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missywritesfor7 · 2 months

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❤️‍🩹Lifeline | MYG❤️‍🩹

Synopsis: It’s long been controversial for idols to date, but idols dating each other can be really beautiful or a complete nightmare. When Yoongi's relationship with another idol is discovered, he decides maybe it’s time to break the taboo and show people it’s ok for idols to date. Instead, they find themselves caught in the midst of one media frenzy after another and struggle to keep their relationship as strong as it had been the past 2 years. Yoongi finds a self destructive way to cope, and it causes even more problems than it solves. As they fight for their relationship and their careers, they discover that sometimes, the only way to truly be free is to let go.

Pairing: idol!Yoongi x idol!OC

Warnings: nsfw, alcoholism, cheating, depression, anxiety, Yoongi goes through a bisexy ho phase, Yoongi is also in his alcoholic phase, post-military BTS

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Ch. 29: 00:00

Hyeri returns to Haeun’s place later Christmas night to see Haeun still hasn’t returned from spending the holiday with family. Hyeri goes into the guest room where she’s been staying during her time here and grabs a few of her things to take into the bathroom so she can wash up. The bathroom is just down the hall so her weak legs carry her to the shower where she stands motionless under the water once it’s reached the perfect temperature. Then she cries.

She never imagined this day would go the way it has. She expected Yoongi to cook her a meal and give her great gifts. She expected him to apologize to her every chance he got. She didn’t expect him to perform a song he had written for her. She didn’t expect any of the emotions that came surging out as he sang to her. There was no way she could say no to giving him another chance. She let everything out to him and she feels free now that she has. Yet for some reason she couldn’t bring herself to agree to return home.

Yoongi pleaded for her to stay, but something held her back. She told him she would give him another chance and that she really wanted to make things work, but something felt like going back home now would be taking too big of a step much too fast. Maybe it’s because these few weeks have given her a chance to not be distracted. She’s been able to focus more on shooting her series and less on what’s happening with Yoongi and who’s waiting outside their home with a camera. Though it’s not perfect, she can’t deny the degree of weight that had been lifted when she didn’t find herself dreading going home. She would get to Haeun’s place, shower, then get a decent sleep without laying awake for hours thinking of how she can’t trust the person she’s laying next to. She feels better rested when she gets to set and needs less coffee and makeup to mask her constant fatigue. This isn’t just for her relationship with Yoongi, she’s doing this for her series that she’s putting her everything into. For her career. For their future.

When Haeun returned home, Hyeri told her about everything Yoongi did for her including his emotional performance. “Hyeri-ya!” Haeun shouts after Hyeri said she agreed to give Yoongi another chance. “What the hell are you doing here then??” If things went well she can’t understand why Hyeri isn’t home with Yoongi instead of sitting on her couch with a glass of wine.

“I’m giving him another chance, but I told him I’m not going home yet,” Hyeri explains.

“Why? After all of that you still had the strength to get up and leave?”

“I’m not ready, unnie,” Hyeri pouts. “I just want things to be simple the way they were when we first started dating. You know how stressed I get about work, I don’t want to be stressed about my relationship on top of that. That day I left and the media saw me leaving made it so hard for me to focus the rest of the day. I don’t want to deal with that, especially if there are more things that come out about him. More…people.”

Haeun understands what Hyeri is saying, though she would have advised that Hyeri return home since it would be hard for them to see each other with their schedules. Hyeri knows it will be challenging, but they’ve navigated busy schedules when they first started dating and made it through. She just wants to go back to that for a while, when it was so simple.

The next day she spoke to Yoongi and he asked her to come home again. She explained to him her reasoning the way she explained it to Haeun. Yoongi understands and let Hyeri know he doesn’t want to do anything to make her feel forced or pressured. He still longs for her day and night though.

So they start slow. Texting between their busy schedules and a phone call before bed. Both of them preparing for their respective New Years festivities they’ve been slotted to attend, then Yoongi texting Hyeri goodnight after she fell asleep on the phone. Hyeri getting an unexpected free hour during the day and wanting to talk to Yoongi but that was the same hour he decided to take a nap in his studio therefore missing her call. By New Year’s Eve they’re relying on shared calendar updates and fan sightings to keep up with one another.

Hyeri is hosting a New Year’s Eve broadcast for one of Korea’s national TV stations, while Yoongi and the guys are performing at a New Year’s festival shortly before midnight to bring in the new year. Neither of them have been able to talk much since a few texts they managed to send to one another earlier in the day. The rest of the day has been a whirlwind of rehearsals, hair and makeup, socializing, then finally showtime.

The broadcast Hyeri is hosting is only set to last only half an hour after the final countdown of the year. With their performance leading right into the countdown, Yoongi hardly has time to catch his breath before the crowd is cheering and they’ve all crossed over into a new year. All 7 of the guys cheer and hug with an unspoken feeling of relief that somehow they managed to survive this tumultuous year. Everyone is healthy now and that’s all they could ask for.

As soon as Yoongi is able to steal a quick second, he immediately pulls his phone out to get a glimpse of Hyeri’s broadcast, even if for just a short minute. She’s wearing a sparkling blue knee length dress and a tiny silver top hat that matches the green one her co-host is wearing. She’s also wearing the beautifully shiny teardrop necklace Yoongi gave her. Seeing her wearing it while smiling at the camera makes his face light up with joy.

Just as quickly he was able to pull up the stream, he’s having to turn it off as he and the guys are pulled in another direction. Lots of cheers and interviews coming from all around until the party finally starts to wind down. The guys were invited to a private New Year’s after party being hosted by a producer and close friend of theirs. Lots of industry figures are set to be there, most of which are attending as a way to celebrate comfortably and privately without cameras around. The guys decide to go since it’s their friend and so they can relax for once before calling it a night and going home.

The atmosphere at the party is buzzing with electricity. It’s like a club with everyone dancing, chatting, and having drinks all around. The guys stick together for the most part making sure someone is at least near Yoongi at all times. They don’t want to police him, but they want to make sure they’re nearby for support. Yoongi appreciates it greatly. This is the first party he’s been to since he’s been clean, plus it’s New Year’s so drinks are flowing all around him, the added support is relieving.

Things start off great with all 7 of them socializing. While the rest of the guys have their pick at alcoholic drinks, Hobi decided to stay sober with Yoongi for the night. While everyone is having specially made cocktails, Hobi brings back alcohol free mocktails for them to sip on. It saves Yoongi from people unknowingly offering him a drink. Outside of the 7 of them, no one has any idea about Yoongi’s struggle with alcohol. This helps keep it that way.

Unfortunately, after his third mocktail Yoongi is starting to weaken. Looking at everyone around him enjoying the night with a good buzz is stirring up a little jealousy in him. He still has Hoseok next to him, but now his sober presence has lost its effectiveness. It’s New Year’s, why can’t he have one drink to celebrate?

As soon as the intrusive thoughts begin to grow, Yoongi whispers to Hobi that he’s starting to have a hard time. Hobi takes him to a back corner of the room and grabs a cup of water for him. Yoongi sips the water and takes a moment to breathe.

“I don’t think I can stay,” Yoongi says. “It’s starting to be too much.”

“It’s ok, hyung,” Hobi replies. He’s thankful that Yoongi is being honest about this and would much rather him head home than try to fight the urge silently. “If you’ve reached your limit it’s ok. You did good today.” Hobi’s smile shines brighter than the strobe lights blinking across the room.

“Thanks, Hoba,” Yoongi says forcing a smile. He appreciates the good job, but he feels like he’s not fully in the clear yet. He still has to make it out of the party, to his car, and home, without giving in to the whisper tickling the back of his neck that’s telling him it would be fine if he just has one drink to celebrate.

Yoongi stands and maps his route to the door in his mind. He tries to move quickly but it’s not easy with the place packed with so many people. After every step he’s having to swerve and dodge around people like he’s in a video game. When he finally makes it out the door he quickly walks across the parking lot towards his car. The faster he can get out of there and get home, the better.

“Yoongi!”

The voice behind him startles him and nearly sends him into shock until he turns around and sees Hyeri running between the parked cars to get to him.

“Hyeri?” He says catching her as she jumps into his arms. He isn’t sure why she’s suddenly running to him like this, but he’s not complaining. Her timing is perfect and warmth is calming.

Once Hyeri’s event ended she learned of this after party being held and decided to stop by after she learned that the guys would possibly be there. Yoongi would possibly be there. When she arrived she immediately saw Hobi who told her Yoongi had just left. Hoping she wasn’t too late, she ran back outside where she saw him across the few rows of cars. Running and jumping into his arms the way she did wasn’t planned but she felt something take over her legs and she couldn’t stop.

“I’m glad I caught you,” she says breathing a sigh of relief. “Hobi told me you had just left so I thought I was too late.”

“No,” he smiles giving her a light squeeze. “You’re right on time. Did you come here looking for me?”

“Well,” she looks up at him with a soft smile. “I wanted to make sure my first kiss of the year was with you, not on set with In-woo.” She lifts herself on her toes and links her lips with his.

How does this feel so brand new to him? They’ve kissed many times, but for some reason today means the most to him. No amount of fireworks can compare to the sparks lighting up between them. He thought he was about to crumble, but he once again finds safety in her impeccable timing. He wants to take advantage of this moment together.

“Do you have a little time?” He asks. “We don’t have to go anywhere or anything, we can just sit in my car and talk if you want.”

“Yeah,” she smiles. “I have time.”

Hyeri follows Yoongi to his car where they both instinctively get in the backseat. This isn’t the first time they’ve taken refuge in a car just for a moment alone, but it definitely takes them back to the early days of their relationship. There’s a nostalgia to the way they cuddle close to each other while remaining vigilant for anyone who may walk by and see them.

“I miss you,” Yoongi smiles with relief. “You have no idea how much I needed you right now.”

“You look like you need some sleep,” she says noticing the way he looks exhausted and distressed.

“I was having a hard time in there,” he admits. “I was fine at first, but then I don’t know what happened it just felt like the walls were suddenly closing in so I left.”

“You made the right choice,” she smiles. “I’m proud of you.”

“Thanks, babe.” He pulls her closer into his body feeling a sense of accomplishment from hearing her praise. “You look so beautiful.”

“Thanks,” she blushes. Even after 3 and a half years together she still gets shy whenever he compliments her.

“I guess you weren’t kidding when you said you wanted to start over from when we first started dating,” he jokes. “When did you get so shy around me?” He strokes her chin pulling an even bigger sheepish smile from her.

“I’m not,” she giggles.

“Really?” He giggles playfully mocking her and making her laugh.

“Hush.” She playfully pushes him then immediately leans back into his chest.

“If you say so,” he smiles kissing her forehead. Then he lifts her chin and kisses her lips. He feels like he’s being overcome by a strong current of pure comfort. Coming from what became a stressful challenge for him inside, this comfort feels ten times stronger in this moment.

Hyeri loves the feeling. The butterflies that flutter wildly within her gives her a rush she hasn’t felt in so long. She doesn’t want to get out of his car anytime soon, but it’s already nearly 3 am. Still, she stays attached to his lips with her arms clutching around his torso hoping time will be kind, but it’s not and Yoongi is aware of this too. Perhaps more than she does, he wants nothing more than to stay attached to her, especially after the mild panic he was experiencing right before she came running towards him.

“Hyeri,” he whispers almost freezing at the sight of her looking much too good to let go. “Come home with me.”

“Yoongi,” she starts. “You know-“

“I know,” he interrupts. “I’m not asking you to stay if you’re not ready, but just for tonight? Will you stay the night with me?”

“Just the night?”

“If you want,” he nods.

Hyeri feels so stupid suddenly. She thought Yoongi would beg and plead the way he did on Christmas, but ever since she explained her feelings and reasoning why she didn’t want to go home yet, he hasn’t tried to press her. Her initial thought was that he was asking her to come home to stay, but she should have known better than to think he would try pressuring her. She feels stupid for even doing this in the first place, of course she wants to stay the night with him. She wants to spend every night with him.

“Ok,” she smiles and nods. “Just for the night.”

Yoongi’s face lights up and he gives her another kiss. They both jump out of the car with Yoongi getting in the driver’s seat and Hyeri heading towards her car. The entire way home Yoongi can’t stop smiling. He’s filled with so much excitement to have Hyeri come home even if it’s just for one night. He made it through the night without having a drink and he’s getting to spend a little time with Hyeri, he couldn’t be happier right now.

When they arrive, Hyeri immediately goes to the bathroom to undress and get ready for bed. Out of pure habit she tosses her dress aside, throws on one of Yoongi’s t-shirts, and returns to him waiting for her in bed. They’ve both had a long and tiring day, so without saying much they cuddle close, kiss goodnight, then drift off to sleep under the blanket of each other’s arms.

When Yoongi wakes up the next day, Hyeri is still sleeping soundly next to him. All he can do is lay there a while and smile at a sight he’s missed for weeks. He isn’t sure if she’s missed him the way he’s missed her, but he hopes she stays home for good after this. It’s been quiet and lonely at home and seeing her things still there made him long for her more. He hasn’t felt so refreshed in the morning since she left, although right now it’s more like early afternoon. Regardless, he knows she loves waking up to a good meal, so he reluctantly slides out of bed to go to the kitchen and make brunch.

Things have been busy lately so Yoongi hasn’t done much cooking, but thankfully he always has some pork belly, eggs, and veggies on hand. He cooks everything up nicely just the way Hyeri likes, and as usual it summons her out of her sleep and into the kitchen.

“Morning,” she says shuffling up to him to see what he’s making.

“Afternoon,” he smiles. “How’d you sleep?”

“Good,” she smiles back. She’s not going to say how she hasn’t slept so good in a long time, but she’s certainly having a hard time convincing herself that she still needs a bit more time. “I think my body is starting to feel the effects of being on my feet all night though.”

“Sit,” he points to the chair. “Just relax.” He turns off the stove and plates his creation before placing it in front of her. He then grabs a couple of bottles of citrus tea out of the fridge and takes a seat next to her.

“Thanks,” she says taking a bite of pork belly.

The two indulge in a mostly quiet lunch, though it’s not awkward at all. They’ve had many silent meals because they’re just that comfortable with each other. They don’t always need to say anything to enjoy each other’s company, it’s a comfortable silence they didn’t realize they had missed so much.

After their meal they relocate to the couch where Yoongi begins massaging Hyeri’s feet as she lounges across the couch with her feet in his lap. It’s become a bit of a routine on the days they have free time together, Yoongi can always sense when Hyeri needs a massage on any part of her body and he spends the day trying to take her every ache away.

“I can’t believe I got you the best foot massager I could find yet I’m still massaging your feet by hand,” Yoongi jokes.

“No one is making you rub my feet,” Hyeri laughs.

“That’s true,” he says stopping his hand movements and moving her feet aside.

“Oh,” she pouts.

“Where’s your foot massager,” he teases almost melting at her adorable pout.

“Haeun is probably using it right now,” she laughs. Haeun has spent the better part of the last week trying to take the lavish piece of relaxation off of Hyeri’s hands. Hyeri agreed to let Haeun use it as rent payment for her time staying there but made it clear she was taking it when she leaves.

“Haeun?” Yoongi tilts his head with a brow raised.

“Yeah…..” she hesitates. Secret is out now, though part of her doesn’t even care anymore because she’s thinking she may stay home for good now. Maybe.

“You hate me that much that you didn’t want to tell me you were staying with your best friend?”

“It’s not that, I just…” Hyeri sits upright bringing her feet down to the floor. “I knew you would try to find me and at the time I left I didn’t want you to. I didn’t want to see or talk to you or think about you. When I saw all of the people outside with their cameras I was even more upset, especially since they got photos of me leaving and I just don’t want to have to deal with that right now. So no, I didn’t want you to know I was staying with Haeun. I didn’t want you, or the media, or any other crazy person trying to follow you find me and have my name thrown across the internet again. You did more than just betray my trust, Yoongi. You caused me a lot of hurt in so many ways and I don’t even know what I did to deserve it.”

“You didn’t,” he shakes his head. “You didn’t deserve anything I put you through and I’ll regret it til the day I die. I know this all started because I was upset with you, but you did absolutely nothing to deserve everything I did. I wasn’t myself, Hyeri, and I know that’s not an excuse, I just couldn’t get control of myself. If I hadn’t been so seriously fucked up all of the time I would have never cheated on you. Never in my right fucking mind would I have done that.”

“I believe you, but I still can’t trust you. I never once thought that you weren’t sorry for what you’ve done. When I first confronted you I thought you would lie straight to my face, but you told me the truth when you could’ve easily fed me any bullshit story.”

“I couldn’t lie to you,” he says. “That would have only made me feel worse…how did you know what the truth was?” He tilts his head and raises a brow in suspicion. “Did one of the guys tell you? It was Namjoon wasn’t it?”

“No,” she shakes her head. “You told me. That night Jin carried your drunk ass home, you kept talking and talking. You said a lot because you thought you were talking to Jin, but even after he left you didn’t even realize it was me you were talking to. I was so upset, and even more the next morning when I saw you. I was ready to leave that day if you were to lie to me. I was in the guest room that entire night mentally preparing myself to pack my shit and leave. Then you admitted everything to me and I wasn’t sure what to do. I was so sure you’d lie that I never thought of what to do next if you didn’t.”

Yoongi sits silently trying to recall any memory from the night of their end of tour dinner. The only thing he remembers is drinking that entire day and waking up with the worst hangover the next morning. He shakes his head hating the thought of how bad he was that night.

“It’s ok,” Hyeri assures. “I didn’t know what to do then, but I think I finally know what I want to do now.”

“What’s that?” Yoongi asks.

“I want to stay,” she admits.

“Stay?”

“Yeah,” she nods. “Rebuilding trust is going to take time, and I know it won’t be easy, but I still want to work on it. I want to stay and work through this with you.”

“Stay?” He asks again.

“I have to be on set early tomorrow, but I’ll get my things from Haeun’s place and come here after I’m done shooting.” She reaches up to stroke his cheek which pulls out his biggest gummy smile.

Yoongi feels like he’s been waiting his entire life to hear her say those words. Someone could come steal every single one of his possessions and it wouldn’t be able to wipe the smile off his face. He won’t fuck this up again.

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osoreee · 3 months

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Might be triggering I speak about littles and their trauma (COCSA) If you don't want to read the post but still want to feel included then you can share your experiences with littles from your system:> (Anyones welcome to)

I probably shouldn't share it but I really need to get it off my chest

My little is an alter based on the COCSA we went through at 7 years old. Its very hard for me to speak about it so please don't mind if the sentences will get messy.

She looks exactly like me when I was 7 years old. And the thing with that alter is, she's stuck in her trauma. That part of me can't move on. I dont know what happend back then, exactly, because I have heavy amnesia on that memory. But after digging into it, I'm not sure if I want to know more. It left enough bruises on my mental health.

However part of me wants to know. I want to know what happend to me. Living with only few flashbacks makes me invalidate my own experiences. My parent remembers it. X remembers when I came home after it happend. X said I immediately went to my room, cried... bawled for hours and didn't let anyone touch me. I remember I took hours long showers that I desperately wanted to make me clean. However even after so many years I still feel dirty.

My parent discovered that it happend to me only a month ago, after I told them about it, they connected the dots and my behaviour on the day it happend and it immediately made a lot more sense for them. I also didn't know about this memory for too long. This memory came back and crushed me completely only few months after system discovery. Before that I was slightly aware of this however I just convinced myself that it was a dream.

I wish it was, I beg it was. I beg that its just my stupid imagination making up weird shit. However, my body remembers, my mind remembers - my little knows. And the thing that he gave me, to keep me quiet, it haunts me everytime I visit my nans house. I dont know why I kept it. Maybe to remind myself that what I went through was real. Other than that I have massive fear of treehouses. I'm terrified of them and would never step my foot in there again. In childhood I had a treehouse that I would play in everyday. But you can probably guess what happend in it, and why im scared of them now.

I struggle with my little a lot. Mainly because my trauma made this part of me extremely... sexual? It feels horrible but I cant do anything about it. It puts me in very vulnerable position and it was used to take advantage of me a lot. Even now, when I'm in healthy relationship it gets quite confusing. I think I'm the book example of a feeling like

You don't love me if you touch me.

You don't love me if you don't touch me.

On one hand I feel loved when I'm used and all that. I have my moments where I crave abuse that i went through, or anything really. But if someone actually does it to me, it feels like I'm back in this particular day. As if I were back in that terrifying place. I feel bad about myself because of it. I feel dirty that I let it happen. But what could a 7 year old do?

I like all of my alters, however my little is kinda scary to me. I'm scared that I will remember more if I talk with her. But I don't hate her. Even though she's stuck behind trauma, she's still a part of me. I wish I could help somehow. Go back in time and run from that place. But I can't. I'm not ready to go back there even in my head. Which is okay. One day I will, and one day I'll help myself.

#actually did #did #did community #did system #actually dissociative #did plurality #dissociative system #system blog #traumagenic system #anti endo #actually traumagenic #did alter #dissociative identity disorder #system things #system stuff

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firetrucks-fastcars · 9 months

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How are the boys in the quartet spending christmas eve and day? Together? Do they take turns going to each others families? I’m so curious!! 🧡🧡

Merry Christmas friend! My gift to you, some very soft quartet verse Christmas content. I hope you enjoy

Cross-posted on Ao3 here

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Splitting holidays between four people is hard, as they’d recently discovered when they finally got their shit together and sat down to plan out Christmas and New Year’s celebrations. There was no physical way they could all be in their home countries and make time for each other during the holidays and going to see each other’s families was out of the question. Max could have gone with Daniel to Australia, but they felt awful leaving the other two back in Monaco without them. Plus, Christmas wouldn’t really feel complete unless they were all together. So they decided to split up the week before Christmas, Max in Holland, Daniel in Australia, Lando in Belgium and Charles home in Monaco.

It was hard for them, being apart, especially with Daniel in a time zone ten hours ahead. Especially when Lando got whiny, bratty, and needy half-way through the five days and Max had to add Daniel to a joint facetime call where they did their best to talk him into a light sub-space and coordinate aftercare through a screen with Daniel fighting to stay awake at 2am, Australia time. Especially when poor Charles called Max sobbing in the middle of the night because he’d had a nightmare and there was nothing he could do other than talk to him gently, praying his distorted voice through tiny phone speakers was enough.

Needless to say, when Max’s plane touched down in Nice the Monday before Christmas, his arms were aching to hold his boys. He was landing the earliest, with Lando’s plan getting in later that afternoon as he’d made a quick pit stop in England to visit Max F. and Daniel joining them late that night.

Charles was already waiting for them at the apartment, which Max knew because he’d texted them with an update on how badly the cats had destroyed their living space while left partially unattended. Only one of Lando’s hoodies and a small potted plant had been sacrificed to their wrath so Max counted it as mostly successful.

Amour: leaving the airport now

Schatje: good. tell them to drive quickly

Amour: patience my love. i’ll see you soon

Max did silently will his driver to navigate the endless Monaco traffic a bit faster, but the poor man was doing the best he could in a sea of luxury cars and confusing intersections. When they finally reached their apartment, Max could have cheered, but restrained himself, instead thanking the man politely and retrieving his bag from the trunk. He was scarcely in the door before he was practically tackled by Charles.

“I missed you so much!” he cried into Max’s shoulder, fingers fisted into his t-shirt like vices.

“I missed you too Charlie,” Max pulled away to kiss his forehead. “How are your mom and brothers?”

“Mama and Lorenzo are doing well. Arthur was dropped from the Ferrari driver academy so it’s been a tough few days.”

“Poor Arthur,” Max tutted sympathetically. “What’s his plan now?”

“To mope for a while I’m sure. Then he’ll pick himself up and get back to work. A season off might do him some good, even if it isn’t what he wants. He puts too much pressure on himself.”

“Sounds like he takes after his big brother.”

“Oh shut up,” Charles batted at his chest lightly. “I laid out some clean clothes for you and put a towel in the warmer. I thought you might like to shower after your flight.”

“Such a sweet boy. Only if you were planning to shower with me.”

“Of course.”

Charles joined him in the shower as promised, even using one of the eucalyptus shower steamers they usually reserved for aftercare showers to relax them more. He insisted on washing Max’s hair, standing slightly on his tiptoes to make sure he got all of the suds out. Max returned the favor, enjoying the small moans and whimpers Charles let out as he scratched and massaged his scalp. Out of the shower, Max toweled him off and covered his body in the scented lotion he loved before bundling him into some sweatpants and one of his own white t-shirts.

“Can we lie in bed for a while?” Charles asked while Max was dressing himself in the clothes the other had put out for him. “I have a week of cuddles to catch up on.”

“Of course schatje.”

They threw back the covers and climbed into bed, resolving to wait there for Lando to return to them. Max had to admit his left arm felt empty without Lando curled into the crook of it, no hair tickling Max’s chin and drool staining his shirt. He wouldn’t feel complete until the four of them were back together, squeezed right into each other’s space where they belonged. Lando had texted that the plane was taking off just as they were getting out of the shower, so Max kept an eye on his plan tracker to have a rough idea of when he’d be arriving. Charles dozed on and off beside him as Max scrolled on his phone and kept an eye on Lando’s flight information, eager for the youngest to join them.

Eventually, he too dozed off, and was woken by the sound of a key turning in the lock and Lando’s gentle voice greeting Jimmy and Sassy.

“We’re in the bedroom,” Max called out to him and he could hear Lando’s eager footsteps headed their way almost immediately.

Lando let out a soft whine as he practically threw himself on top of Max, pressing their bodies as close as he could physically get them.

“Hi baby boy,” Max said, running gentle hands through his messy curls. “How was your flight?”

“Long. I missed you guys so much.”

“We missed you too love. Go shower, then you can join us.”

Lando huffed in annoyance, but did as he was told, taking what might have been the quickest shower of his life so he could rejoin his partners quickly. He settled in on Max’s other side, pushing up his boyfriend's t-shirt to rest his head against his belly. His arm was slung over Max’s waist to curl in the waistband of Charles’s sleep pants and as soon as he got comfortable and still, he was asleep.

They spent the rest of the day in bed, taking short naps, only getting up to use the bathroom and when Max finally convinced them that they needed to eat something for dinner. They threw together something quick from one of Charles’s prepped meals and ate together on the sofa. Lando was allowed to choose the first Christmas movie of the week which was Home Alone. Undoubtedly, they would end up watching it more than once because Daniel also loved the film.

When Daniel finally texted that his plane to Nice was boarding, Max breathed a sigh of relief. Soon, all four of them would be back together. Charles and Lando insisted on waiting up for him, not caring how late it would be, so in order to stay awake, Charles loaded up Disney+ and began a marathon of the “Santa Clause” movies, which Lando was appalled Max had never seen. The end credits were rolling on the second movie when they heard a key in the lock and Daniel shuffled his way into the apartment, stopping briefly to greet Jimmy who was curling around his ankles. He spotted his boys on the couch, Lando in Max’s lap barely able to keep his eyes open and Charles pressed against his side, cuddling with Sassy.

Daniel kicked off his shoes and padded into the living room. He slotted himself behind Max on the couch, tugging all three of them close so he could get his arms around them.

“Hey,” he pressed a soft kiss to Max’s ear and one to Lando’s shoulder.

“Welcome home,” Max murmured.

Lando rolled from Max’s lap and into his, hooking all four limbs around his body like a little koala.

“Missed you Danny,” he grumbled against the skin of his neck.

“I missed you too, baby boy. I missed all of you guys.”

“Can we go back to bed now?” Charles whined, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. His hair was sticking up in all directions and Daniel thought he looked like a disgruntled hedgehog.

They made their way back to the bedroom, Lando insisting that he was too tired to walk and Daniel humoring him because he’d missed him so much he didn’t particularly want to let him go anyway. When Daniel returned from his quick shower, there was a spot waiting for him between Lando and Charles. He settled into it, the two younger boys immediately snuggling up to his warmth. He turned his head to kiss Max over where Lando was already snoring between them.

“This is going to be the best Christmas we’ve ever had.”

*****

The days leading up to Christmas were spent decorating the entire apartment. (Well, Charles and Lando were decorating. Daniel and Max were mostly supervising and moving the heavy boxes.) After two days of work, the place looked like Santa’s workshop had thrown up and somehow, Lando had struck a deal with the cats to not be destructive for once because the tree was still standing.

While Lando and Charles were playing Santas’s elves, Max and Daniel braved the city to do last minute gift shopping for the two boys. It was the first time they’d be spending the actual holiday together, so they’d decided to spoil them as much as possible. Their main mission had been to pick up the boys’ surprise gifts. They’d all sent each other wish lists almost a month prior so they all had a vague idea of what they’d be getting from the others, but Max and Daniel had decided to surprise Lando and Charles with bracelets. Daniel had bought Max one of the Cartier love bracelets when they’d been together a year, and Max had gotten Daniel one for his birthday the following year. So they’d decided to purchase one for both Lando and Charles as they were coming up on a year of all four of them being together.

When they returned home, the other two gave them a tour of the now unrecognizable apartment before they snuck away to the bedroom to wrap their gifts and place them under the tree. Lando spent a solid fifteen minutes trying to get Max and Daniel to spoil the surprise, only being deterred by Daniel swatting the back of his thigh and threatening him with a spanking.

Their real celebrations started on Christmas Eve. They began the day with a giant breakfast spread, a tradition of Lando’s from when he was a child. They’d all agreed that nothing they ate this week counted because of the holiday and they would just work harder when they resumed training after the new year. Lando assisted Max with making pancakes and scrambled eggs, while Daniel fried bacon and sausage out on the balcony. Charles was tasked with cutting up fruit and making the yogurt dip Lando’s trainer had sent the recipe over (the only remotely healthy thing part of the spread). They ate on the living room floor, bathed in the glow of Christmas lights with “Elf” playing on the TV in the background.

When their bellies were full, they threw the dishes in the sink and moved on to Daniel’s childhood tradition. They each got to open one gift that was under the tree. The only catch was, Daniel got to pick. He handed the three of them boxes, all the same size but wrapped in different types of paper. When the opened them, they pulled out matching sets of pajamas, covered in tiny christmas trees and formula cars, the color scheme corresponding to their respective teams.

“Where did you find these Daniel?” Max managed to ask through his laughter.

Lando had already started stripping off his clothes to replace them with his papaya pjs.

“I have my ways Maxy, don’t you worry.”

They spent the rest of the afternoon lounging in their apartment, snacking on junk food and taking turns showing each other their favorite Christmas movies. Max even managed to find one of his favorite Dutch movies with English subtitles.

“Hey Max,” Lando murmured.

The younger boy was wrapped in a blanket and snuggled against Max’s side.

“Yeah baby?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too Lando.”

“This is the best Christmas ever.”

“I’m glad.”

When they got ready to start dinner, Lando snuck off to the office to play a few games with Max F. and some of his other friends while the other three cooked.

Charles and Max slaved over Pascale’s bread recipe to have with their Christmas dinner that had been dropped off by Brad, who knew that Max would struggle to make those types of food on his own. Conveniently, there was enough for four. Max assumed that Brad knew, though his trainer had never said anything to him. He made a mental note to send him a text later as a thank you.

Charles wrapped his arms around his waist and pressed a kiss to the back of Max’s neck as he stood at the counter slicing the bread they’d made.

“Looks great,” he commented.

“We did a pretty good job,” Max agreed. He turned in Charles’s arms and gave him a quick kiss. “Will you go tell Lando it’s time to eat?”

Charles nodded and padded off in the direction of the office. He knocked on the door in their secret pattern and waited for Lando to answer.

“Come in!”

Lando was sitting in front of the computer, face lit by the screen, headset half on his head so he could hear Charles.

“Are you muted?’ he murmured, low enough to not be picked up by the mic.

“It’s just Max, you’re safe.”

Charles nodded and made his way into the office fully, pressing a kiss to Lando’s head.

“Dinner is ready.”

“Great, I’m starving.” He turned back to the monitor and tapped a few buttons on his keyboard to turn off the game. “Hey Max, I’m going to eat. I’ll talk to you later.”

From his proximity to Lando’s headset, Charles could vaguely hear his friend’s response, “Alright mate. Have a good night, Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas mate.”

They ate their dinner much in the same way they ate their breakfast, the dim lights of the tree bathing them in a warm, yellow glow.

When their plates were clear and the dishes for the day were clean, Daniel stood and clapped his hands.

“Alright boys, better get to bed early or Santa won’t come.”

They all chuckled at Daniel’s antics but followed the oldest to the bedroom and climbed into bed together.

“Merry Christmas my loves,” Max said when they were settled, wrapped up in each other.

“Merry Christmas,” the other three chorused.

*****

Lando woke them up early the next morning like a little boy, dragging his partners to the living room. The youngest of them had been frothing at the mouth for days, both to open his gifts and give gifts to the other three. They made him sit and wait, the poor boy practically bouncing in his seat as Daniel passed the presents around. They’d set a gift limit, one from each person to the others, to keep the pile of gifts from being bigger than was necessary.

When all of the gifts had been opened, and Daniel scooped up the wrapping paper like a dad, Max snuck off to the bedroom to retrieve their surprise gifts.

“Lando and Charles, we have one more gift for you,” he said, handing each of the boys a wrapped box. “This is from both me and Daniel.”

They slid the ribbons off carefully, pulling off the lids to the boxes to look inside.

Lando gasped when he realized what it was, looking up at them with tears already welling in his eyes.

“Really?” he asked, voice soft.

“Yes really. We wanted you two to have your own.”

“Will you put it on me?”

“Of course.”

Max gently tightened the screws on Lando’s band and Daniel did the same for Charles.

“Does it feel alright?”

“It feels great. Thank you Maxy.”

“You’re welcome Lando.”

He pressed a kiss to the youngest’s head, pulling him in for a tight hug. Lando pulled him down onto the couch for a cuddle and Charles did the same to Daniel. Lando and Charles curled up between them, clinging to their partners. Daniel pressed a kiss to Charles’s head and turned to look at Max.

“I told you, best Christmas ever.”

#formula 1 rpf #formula 1 #max verstappen #daniel ricciardo #lando norris #charles leclerc #maxiel #lesteppen #dando #charles x lando #charles x daniel #my works #quartet verse

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prttylight · 1 year

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@ Anakin Skywalker × Female!Reader ( Part. 2 )

— english is not my first language; I'm just trying to practice don't pay attencion to this please

⚠️ mentions of rape and violence

tags: confort, therapy, established relationship

— Part 1 !

Summary: Someone tried to rape reader while Anakin was on a mission, the last thing that the reader wants, is to talk about it. AO3

Anakin was worried, he knew from the conversation you two had, that you didn't want to talk about what happened. And it was okay, he would wait for your recovery how much you needed it. Nevertheless he wasn't sure if staying in bed would be good for you, you worked, yes but he couldn't see anymore the passion you had as a Senator before the attack.

He asked for advices, and received good ones. He tried to talk to you, recommending a therapist who would help you with the mental problems that this attack could cause you. You didn't listen.

You were feeling depressed, dirty and guilty. Anakin was there for you, but you couldn't help to avoid him, you were in a black hole seeing no light to escape from this invisible pain.

You woke up, it was night and Anakin was picking things from the wardrobe, you thought that maybe he finally gave up on you. Faking that you were still sleeping, you tried to not cry. Sadness again in your heart, but did you know that you don't deserve him.

Anakin kept in silence before he walked around the bed and sat next to your body.

" Are you still sleeping, my dear?" He touched your hair, and probably also smiled but you couldn't see it. "I know you don't"

…

" It's okay, you don't have to say anything, you just have to hear me" Anakin whispered, making your heart ache, you didn't know why you ignored him since you wanted so much to admire his face "I have to go to a mission, probably I will be going for a week "

Anakin stroked your face, his fingers traced around your cheek, made you blush.

" I set a date with a therapist in two days, for you" softly said, fearing your reaction. " I'm going to leave you a paper with the information you need. And I know you didn't want to go, just take a little time to think about it. Okay, Love? Just… A little of your time."

He kissed your hand.

" Just remember, any that your choice is, I love you and I always will be right here"

His lips kissed your forehead.

He wasn't in the apartment anymore, your tears moistened your cheeks, where his hands were before. You touched there with your own hands, trying to replicate his warmth.

You knew you had the power to change this, it was under your control. You felt the pain under your chest, and it was time to let it go.

You wanted to search for Anakin, however surely it was late, and first you needed a shower.

In your mind, therapy sounded scary. But when you cried in the first session, you finally discovered that it wasn't. Therapy was a relief.

It was hard, talking about the attack mostly. And the fact that Anakin left for three weeks instead of one, it was also kinda complicated, but he came back, like he promised, and finding you, waiting with a smile made him sob.

#star wars #anakin imagine #imagine #fanfic #anakin fanfiction #anakin x reader #one shot #anakin skywalker imagine #writing #anakin needs a hug #clone wars anakin

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darlingmbappe · 2 years

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Rules: 🎶 when you get this, list 5 songs you’ve been listening to & tag 5-10 people.

Tagged by @kymb-10 & @photmath <3

"Homeless Brother" by Don McLean: Mister McLean’s lyrics always hit so hard. This song explains the hardships of those who don’t have a home. It gives a deep and different perspective to the people we’re used to passing on the streets without a second glance. Absolutely beautiful words, sung like poetry. — Stand out lyrics: “There’s freedom when you’re walking, even though you’re walking slow.” “But somewhere’s just like nowhere when you leave there for a while.” “Down the bowels of a broken land where numbers live like men. Where those who keep their senses have them taken back again.”

"In Bloom" by Nirvana: Kurt Cobain’s lyrics can really be interpreted into a million and a half different forms, but this one’s kind of summed up to poke fun at people who “discovered” their music when they started to become more popular and hop on the bandwagon, but don’t have enough self awareness to realize it’s them. The beat is so catchy. Good luck getting it out of you’re head once it’s in there. — Stand out lyrics: “He knows not what it means when I say, he’s the one who likes all our pretty songs, and he likes to sing along, and he likes to shoot his gun, but he don’t know what it means.”

"READ YOUR DIARY" by Måneskin: Just a pure pleasure song about a man obsessed with a woman while he waits until he gets to touch her again. — Stand out lyrics: “Cried on your nudes wearing your perfume, now I taste like you.” “Alone in the shower, using my left hand so it feels like you.”

"Hanger 18" by Megadeath: Y’all this is an absolute head banger of a song. I’m obsessed with a good guitar solo in metal/rock music, and the entire second half of the song is just crazy guitar solos paired with drums. The lyrics are eh but listen for the instruments. — Stand out lyrics: “Military intelligence; two words combined that can’t make sense.”

"Funeral" by Phoebe Bridgers: Always my go-to when I need a good cry (or I Know the End). The lyrics feel personal, very raw. The soft backtrack guitar fits so perfectly with her harmonies. Love that woman so much. Even though all the lyrics are amazing, here are my favs anyway. — Stand out lyrics: “Jesus Christ, I’m so blue all the time. And that’s just how I feel. Always have and I always will.” “I woke up in my childhood bed wishing I was someone else, feeling sorry for myself, when I remembered someone’s kid is dead.” “And it’s four a.m… again. And I’m doing nothing… again.”

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pbandjesse · 1 year

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We just got back from seeing the Barbie movie. Where I cried the entire time. It was great. I'm really glad we made it happen.

It was a good way to end this week of camp. It was not a bad week at all. But it was very very hot today and that made the day hard.

I slept okay last night. I found a frog at midnight and followed that for a bit. Looked at the stars. And eventually fell asleep.

I woke up at 6 and was very cold. I had only used the one blanket and my underside was freezing. Which was expected. I got up and wrapped my blanket around myself and fell back asleep.

I woke up at 8 and it was already to warm. I got dressed and tried to feel alright. While I was getting ready I watched a video. And when I was outside brushing my teeth Ty came by to chat. And then I went for a little walk. I did not find mushrooms in the normal places but I did find them in a trashcan near the goats. I pet the goats and went to see the birds. Quakers the duck chased me!! And then I was very hot and the bugs kept hitting me in the face and I just wanted to be back in my fan space.

Which was honestly a big help. I would give Annabelle one of my fans that I haven't been using this year. Hopefully it helped her.

My groups were honestly great today. The woodlands were super fun and all wanted me to teach them bracelets after we played the exquisite corpse game. And they were having so much fun they didn't want to go. Honestly that was a trend today. The kids were just a lot of fun and while we were all got it was just like a joyful day.

Lunch was fine. It was the nicest the kitchen staff has been to me. They made me a fresh tomato sandwich. I put cheese and mayo on mine. And it was good. Love in season tomatoes.

I would have some time sitting in the dark which was excellent and made me feel a lot cooler. Annabelle and Celia would come chat in the dark for a bit, since I left the doors open. And it was just chatting about ideas and groups and the weather.

The afternoon was very warm. So doing metal casting was a little tough but we had some excellent results and it was fun!! And there was more bracelet making. I'm surprised it took this long this summer for it to catch on with the boys but it's been nice.

James and me made our plan to go to the movies at 630. So I let Heather know I wouldn't be able to help at the bears. Which is sad because I love helping st the bears. But I was excited to see a movie with my husband. We have gone to more plays then we have movies. So this was a fun treat. And I was very much looking forward to the Barbie movie.

In my last day camp group the kids were fun. Louisa and her friends helped set up the table for next week. Which is sock puppet making! Which I think will be fun but I'm a little nervous about. But the girls seemed jazzed about it so I have high hopes.

I got my stuff packed up and as I was about to drive away Ty comes running, literally running, towards the car. And I'm like??? Butbhe was returning my yarn and was like why you leaving? I told him about the movie and that the building was open and we said goodbye see you.on Monday!

It was a fine drive. I had a snack with me and waved at all the kids as I left. It was a half hour to home. Almost no traffic. And I got home in one piece.

It was stupid hot here though. Much warmer then at camp. I was happy to see my James but hugging was almost out of the question. Shower first.

I washed my hair and shaved my legs and it helped me feel way more human. I put on my pink outfit. I don't own much pink but I'm happy with what I picked. I felt very cute.

We drove to the rotunda to go to our movie and have our little French fry dinner at a place called the local fry. James and me had a big laugh when we discovered that the phone cord was closed in the door but still worked! That poor cord has been through so much.

We got to the fry place. James had ordered ahead. They got a banh mi and I got seasoned fries with cheese and ranch and a whole half an avocado. I really enjoyed it.

Me and James would split and they went to put leftovers in the car and I went to go to the Walgreens for candy but the Walgreens closed??? Like permanently! Crazy. So no candy for me.

But we headed to the theater. I loved seeing everyone dressed up for the movie. I like that it's an experience. I was a little confused about this theater. No one checked out tickets? We just waited on the hall until they let us in.

The seats were very comfy but I didn't like how close we were to the screen. I was nervous about feeling nauseous but after the trailers it wasn't a problem. Thankfully the movie didn't have a ton of quick motion.

I loved the movie. I was crying almost immediately and by the end I was sobbing. Like there were parts I didn't love as much or would have liked to be expanded on more. But mostly it was so good. I loved the 4th wall breaks and the breaking of the narrative and Margot Robbie did such a wonderful job. I honestly felt so connected to her and it helps that we are the same age. Or at least very close to the same age, her being born on 1990 and me in 1991. I was super invested and I was just. Having the best cries.

The girls next to us were also great. The one directly next to me also was crying. And at the end she said she was glad she wasn't the only one and that the last time she saw it (this was her second time) the person next to her didn't cry and she was a little embarrassed. But no I was right there with her and I told her about how I make art about toys and how someday I want to do a doctorate and research and write about toys and gender relations and she was so funny she was like this movie was perfect for you you are the coolest person and it was just such a sweet moment. I love women, I love girlhood, and I love how much we are all connected.

James says they liked the movie but I think they were more focused on how much I cried. It was a good cry, like it was deep feelings for me. I'm glad they were there for me and with me.

We got out of the theater and it was raining. It was pretty clear that it has stormed very bad while we were in there. There were chairs and tables and trees toppled over. We were safe in Barbie land.

We got home and I immediately got changed. I fed the frog. I pet Sweetp. I opened some mail. And now I am just in the AC. I am very tired but I am just happy to be home and with my husband. I love them so much.

Tomorrow I have a busy day. With the market and then a graduation party and then making sure James and the camp boys get to the game safely. If the game is still happening, if there is a storm or not. I hope it is a good day. I hope you all have a good night and are staying safe.

Goodnight everyone. I love you all.

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stokesy55 · 23 days

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ahahahahah, I do like VK underestimating him

Not only does VK underestimate how hard Pat can fuck him, he also underestimates how many times he can fuck him 🤭 Considering Pat is just 18, he has the stamina to fuck VK all night long if he wishes to. And in the beginning, he certainly wishes to. 😉

Their wedding night, VK thinks they're done after the first round. He rolls over wincing, and gets to his feet unsteadily, only for Pat to yank him back with a bemused, "Where do you think you're going, honey?" VK's eyes widen in horror, as he realizes Pat isn't done with him. He gulps. He was already so bruised and sore after the first round, a second one might just kill him. He's so wrong when he assumes it's just two rounds. Pat takes him about ten times that night, pounding into him so mercilessly that VK fears his waist will be broken by the end of it 🤭🤣

The next morning, VK tries to get out of bed, only to find he's aching too much to move. "uff, marr gaya!" (oh, I'm dead!) He laments as he flops back down on the bed. When he begs Pat to help him out of bed, his husband just smirks as he lifts him into his arms and carries him into the shower. Where he proceeds to push him against a wall and fuck him AGAIN. 🤣🤣🤣 "Should I hand in my retirement already?" VK pants snarkily, as Pat thrusts into him. "Because if you keep this up, I'll be an invalid soon."

Over the first week, VK discovers that Pat considers any moment he's not fucking him as a moment wasted. He can get started anytime, anywhere. VK is cooking lunch once, when Pat wraps his arms around him from behind, hefts him onto the kitchen counter and then fucks him raw. Once he bends VK over the study table. And that's not counting all their nighttime escapades when his husband seems possessed. By the weekend, VK locks himself up in the bedroom. "Don't come near me for the next month!" He cries at Pat through the door.

"I've been fucked more times this one week than I've been in the rest of my life!" VK tells Rohit on a call. "I don't think I can make the next series. I can't even sit down anymore!"

There is a bit of truth to this, but remember in this 'first week' you reference they're newly bonded. You think Patty isn't going to want to keep his hands off him, VK is going to feel like he's on fire every time Patty ISN'T hands all over him

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jacquievandegeer · 1 year

Text

Valencia te quiero

I arrived in Valencia with the bus from Benidorm, it was a noisy travel.

Music, loud and a woman talking in her phone , louder and non stop. On my way to the room I had rented in Valencia there are lots of cars, and also lots of smoking people. Lots. Actually too much. Not sure if I will like Valencia.

I see my street, a small narrow street with some trees, a tapas restaurant and a young Arab man smiles at me. I smile back at him and I try to call the person who will hand me the keys. He asks me if I want to call Sandy. Yes, that is her name, Sandy, like the star from Grease. He says: I will call her, she rents rooms to everyone here. Meanwhile two other young Arab men leave the house. Sandy comes and shows me the apartment, which I share with three Arab young men. Oh dear, I think, I am in Arabia.

I smile and say hi and I am happy to see the apartment is clean, the room is small but clean, only the shower and toilet are on the balcony outside. It reminds me of my time in Prague last summer, where I also had to cross outside on the balcony to do my things.

That night I have the courage to go to the tango, two metro lines away from here. The three Arab guys are watching television, it is loud and they look serious. I sneak outside and discover Valencia. I arrive in a working class neighborhood and I find the tango place, the music is lovely and the walls are deep red, decorations all over the place and soft lights to finish of a kind of bordello look. Only a few couples at the small tables around the dance-floor. It might be an evening where I will only watch, I think. Then the teacher is nice enough to dance with me, I follow his heavenly steps on heavenly music. Oh glorious tango music: Fresedo, di Sarli, Pugliese… Later I dance with a French man and as a dessert I share a wonderful tanda with a young Venezualean dancer. Mission accomplished!

I return to the carer Jardin and find my way easy to my Valencian home. I love it when cities are easy, I love to travel with the public transport. When I enter the house, Arabian music blasts loud, rai music, so that is not so bad. Still, I do hope they will tone it down but I do not want to ask. We’ll see, I think when I open the door. I say Hola! The guys look scared, as if I am going to be angry or something like that. But I smile and say that is really nice music. Then I go to my room, unwind a bit. Within ten minutes it is quiet and when I go to the balcony to brush my teeth, the lights are out and all the young men are in their own rooms. Sweet, I think, that is really sweet of them to be so considerate with this old lady. That night I sleep like a baby, I feel safe and cared for, just like I like it.

The next day is Saturday, the weekend day. Art-galleries, exploring the city center on my own. In the evening I am sharing a meal in a restaurant with my Valencian friends Andrea and Vincent. I met Andrea in Leipzig, she is a super sweet, a bit crazy, a very small but feisty dancer, she speaks German and her speaking is wild and slightly exaggerated. I love it. She thinks I am a queen. Vincent is a writer and works often in Madrid, she cries when he goes there for a few days. He is as lovely as she is, calmer but witty and intellectual, I can dig deep with him in conversations, I love it. Digging deep.

In-between my Saturday activities I return home. I am freshening myself up for the evening and Yassin sits at the kitchen table. We had a small talk this morning, he studies for one year here, electricity or something like that, he misses Marocco. I guess they all do. Far from home, studying hard. He likes me. All of a sudden, before I head out , he asks me if I want to go out with him tonight. To show me the city. I am touched but I also think: Good heavens, you must be twenty three , can’t you see I am old older oldest? I decline with lots of tact, explaining my plans. A part of me is flattered though, it is always nice to get an invitation.

The evening is good, we go after dinner to the museum night and I meet some of the friends of Andrea and Vincent, we drink rioja wine and we discuss art and such afterwards on the museum terras before each of us head home. I outplayed the guys, it is past three and everyone is already in bed, I quietly sneak on the bathroom balcony before jumping in bed. Valencia, I start to warm up to you!

The next day Andrea and her dad and her cousin take me downtown, explaining lots about the history and architecture of this city: Roman, Arab, gothic catholic, Spanish, barok etc. a kaleidoscope of styles. The cousin does not speak English and is shy. I kind of love shy people, for me they spread an authenticity around them and they bring a calm that is rare to find these days. He has a bracelet tattoo around his wrist and I ask him what it is. Imagine, he says, do you know the song? Wow, how nice. When he looks at me, he looks for real into my eyes, we dive in each others eyes. Soft penetration. Sweet.

That evening I go to tango, but this time to another place, by foot, it is only twenty minutes away from me. This place is at a gym, there are no red walls and decorations, it is a big room with a very basic interior. This time a lot of couples. Again I dance with the teacher, it is dynamic, big fun, with lots of unexpected moves. We laugh and I get a compliment, you dance very well. Sweet. I see a man who I would love to dance with, when I watch him dancing I notice that his abrazo is full of care and he oozes protection, it is a big man, older than me, bearded. I dance with some other men and it is nice. But I really would love to dance with the bear.

I decide to help luck a bit. Going around the dance floor to get me a drink, I pass him and I say Hola! He looks up and I smile, he smiles back, that is a relief. When I am back at my seat, I gaze from time to time in his direction and yes! He picks up the signal and he asks me to dance a tanda of waltzes. It is heavenly, just as I thought it would be. We start very simple, one tango we are only walking, which I love, we take time, figuring out each other’s weight and adjusting our abrazo. Then he takes more risks with me and it complicates the dances, he guides me into lovely turns, make smaller steps in staccato rhythms and then I have to follow a lyrical swaying, ending by him inviting me to give all my weight in the dancing. Connection. The tanda is over, we smile, he speaks Spanish. His name is Juan. We go to our own spots. I know he is going to ask me again. And he does. And again. We dance the last dance. Then it is over. Shoes are changed and I walk home. I wonder…if I would have lived in Valencia, would I have danced with Juan again, I guess so. This connection. Tango can make this happen, strong, real, immediate.

I do not see the boys anymore. I visit the cathedral on Monday before flying to Malaga. Catholic churches have such a strong visual attraction for me, their marketing and business model was really good, the statues, the gold, the architecture, everything is so impressive. Over the top and yet a realness in the emotions of the saints and off course Christ. Taking Ryan air to Malaga , arriving midnight and my cab driver is a sweet Nigerian young man, Peter. Beautiful smile. He takes me home, the home in Malaga.

Tidal sleeps already but has send me a small video in which he shows a little box with keys. He magnets it under the fire alarm. Cool. It is one of these buildings where you can enter without needing a key, you only need a key to open the door of the appartement. I take the elevator, tenth floor. I feel under the fire alarm. Check! The box is there! I try to open the box, but it is really difficult, oh my god, I do not want to ring Tidal out of his sleep. I get on my knees because one way or another it feels easier for me. Stay calm, I think. Then the door opens and Tidal stands there in his pyjama. Come in, he says. Was I noisy? No, he says, I slept but then woke up and I sensed you. Connection. The box is really difficult to open, I say. I know, he answers, I go back to sleep now. I hug him and sneak into my room. I am blessed, I think, I am blessed. With connection.

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floplvl · 2 years

Text

On Thursday, my baby girl went into surgery. We surrendered her at 8:30 and six hours later we came to get her. She was so tired, her paws just slid in different directions as she melted down to the ground, softly whining, eyes red, she laid down. I wrapped her in a blanket and she slept until the taxi came.

We drove to my mom’s place, where we have to stay due to my apartment not being suitable to host this little patient. Baby was so tired she couldn’t even walk up the stairs, we had to drag her up. And then we welcomed her to the air mattress we’d put in the living room. She’s not allowed to jump or climb. She was so weak, so tired and so inconsolable. She kept crying softly, especially when I wasn’t beside her. Anytime I got up for the bathroom she cried until I came back.

It all made sense to me now. Why I didn’t get to move to Estonia, why I wasn’t able to work in Norway. Why the universe kept sabotaging every opportunity for me to get out of the country. Why I got an apartment from the city, why I got adminstrated to the school here. Why I am so lucky to have so much work experience that I do not need to be with my classmates right now doing the practice/internship, and instead am on ”vacation” right now until January. Because my Baby would need her mother beside her.

I have spent every second with her. Of course I didn’t go on the event on Friday. I’d much rather be with my baby girl, but even if I’d wanted to attend I couldn’t have because of the bags under my eyes from the crying and exhaustion. It’s the worst feeling in the world, when something happens to our pets.

The second day she was feeling a little better. She’s on painkillers: I give her oral suspension for inflammation and pain in the morning, and then mid-day and evening I give her a small amount of opioids. My mother was against the idea of me giving her opioids, but I think that if she wasn’t the one who had her stomach cut open and then sewn back together she doesn’t have so much to say.

They discovered through an ultrasound, that my baby girl has cancer in her spleen. And we agreed that regardless of consequences or results, it’s the best to remove the whole spleen, because otherwise, due to it having grown to triple its size, it could burst and result in death by internal bleeding. It could have happened as easily as her bumping into a wall.

Anyway, the xrays and ultrasounds cost 485 euros, and the surgery was 1,845e. And although it never crossed my mind to act otherwise, I did observe that it’s a lot of money. But, you can’t really put a price on life, can you? I don’t think so. Besides, money come and go and it’s not even real, so. As long as I added something to her life.

We don’t know the results yet. I don’t know what will happen. I pray for the best, of course. She’s such a good girl. And she’s doing so much better. Today she showered her mommy with kisses and showed that she wants to go out and play, and showed also granny and grampa her toy. My angel is not allowed to do more than regular walking for the next 14 days.

I also removed her plasters today, and sent a picture to the hospital, and they told me it looks really good and how it’s supposed to look. It’s really important to keep everything clean. I am pretty happy I already have some experience in nursing so that I am more comfortable to take good care of her wounds. I won’t show here what ther wound looks like, it’s pretty sensitive and hard to look at.

Now we’re laying in bed listening to relaxation music for dogs. It’s amazing how well it works to get this one to go to sleep. She does regularly xchange positions during the night. I’m so happy she does. I’m never really asleep because I keep listening to her breathing through the night. She’s so precious, so beautiful. I love her so much. I’ll make sure to be the best mommy ever to my baby girl, until the end.

Btw she hates this e-collar soo much, poor thing

This is a really hard time for me, so I’m not really in the mood to write and such. I just want to be with Baby and make the most of the time we have left. I’m hoping we still have years together.

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ro-is-struggling · 2 years

Text

Incomplete || Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: When your relationship started to have problems you and Bucky agreed that the best thing to do would be to break up. At the time it had sounded like the only option you had left. But now, several months later, Bucky was beginning to wonder if he had done the right thing because the pain in his heart and the emptiness in his chest only seemed to grow with each passing day.

Based on prompt 28 from this prompt list: “I tried to go on like I never knew you // I'm awake but my world is half asleep // I pray for this heart to be unbroken // But without you all I'm going to be is incomplete” (Incomplete by Backstreet Boys)

Warnings: angst (with happy ending), one kinda intense kiss scene, english is not my first language! I think that’s all but if I missed anything let me know!

Word count: 2600+

Notes: This story was requested by @tapedeck-hearts Thank you very much for stopping by my blog! This was going to be just pure angst with no happy ending but I guess I was in a fluffy mood so this is the result. I hope you like it anyway💖

Bucky didn't remember breakups being so devastating. He had had his fair share of love affairs in his time and there was a period of time when he thought he was an expert on the subject. He had been through every state and embodied every stereotype of a man in love that existed. He had been the one ending the relationship and he had also been dumped. He remembered most of those instances in great detail and could say with certainty that he had never felt as empty as he did when he woke up in the morning without your body lying next to his.

Things between you were somewhat complicated, not by your choice but rather by the whim of fate. You loved each other, but you soon discovered that that was not the only important thing in a relationship. Sharing quality time together was a very important aspect, one that you were never able to make work. Bucky had a very demanding job. As an Avenger he was constantly traveling on dangerous missions that forced him to spend most of his time away from home and away from you. And when he finally returned it was your work demands that kept you two apart.

You both loved your jobs almost as much as you loved each other. Bucky's job in the Avengers helped him alleviate the guilt he still felt about his past as the Winter Soldier. And you had worked too hard to get where you were, finding a great source of happiness and pride in your daily work to abandon it. Neither of you wanted to give up your jobs and neither of you wanted to be the reason the other gave up their dreams and projects. But you didn't know how to build a future together when your goals were so incompatible. Your relationship seemed to be more trouble than it was worth, so you decided by mutual agreement that the best thing to do was to break up.

It had not been a decision you took lightly, nor did you do it without feeling a great pain in your chest as you said your final goodbye to each other. It was a sad ending to what could have been a beautiful story, and perhaps that was why it hurt so much, but at the time you both genuinely thought it was the only option you had left.

Or so Bucky thought until he began to feel the weight of sadness and loneliness on his shoulders. His days seemed to be grayer without the ray of light that was your presence in his life. His nights were colder without the warmth of your body enveloping him as he slept and he lacked the motivation to get up in the mornings. He felt empty, incomplete, because a part of his heart had stayed with you.

He had done everything to try to forget you. He had given his heart time to heal, he had cried in the shower and at night before going to sleep, he had covered his pain with work. He had even tried to meet new people, to go out with strangers to remind himself that the world hadn't ended and that he wouldn't be alone forever. But nothing seemed to work. Nothing was able to fill the void that your absence had left in his heart.

"What is wrong with me?" Bucky snorted in frustration, taking a long sip of the beer he held in his hands.

"Nothing, pal," Steve said, patting him on the back. "You are in love, that's all."

Sam let out a chuckle at Bucky's absolute ignorance, hiding his grimace of amusement behind the bottle of beer he conveniently lifted to his lips. The super soldier gave him a menacing look, but said nothing. In fact, he remained silent for quite a while, Steve's words echoing in his head.

He was in love.

Suddenly the intensity of his feelings made sense. He knew he deeply cared for you, but your relationship hadn't lasted long enough for him to put words to how he felt about you. He hadn't come to question whether he really loved you even though deep in his heart he had known that he did for a long time. And now he felt even more stupid for letting you go.

"Look, if it's bothering you this much you should talk to her" Sam said as he noticed the gears in Bucky's head moving quickly behind his scowl as he analyzed the situation.

"I can't talk to her! We agreed to break up, she doesn't care about me anymore."

"You don't know that. Maybe she's feeling as miserable as you are right now."

"There is no point. Our relationship didn't work before, why would it work now? I just have to try harder to forget her.”

"Well, maybe this time can be different considering now you know you love her" Steve interjected, speaking as if it were obvious. "Maybe now you can make some changes to make sure it works out."

"Maybe..." Bucky muttered, lost in thought.

His friends' words stayed in his mind for the rest of the week as he considered what he was going to do. Bucky didn't know if you felt the same way he did, if you missed sleeping in his arms and waking up next to him the way he did. And honestly he was afraid to know the answer. He was afraid to find out that you were over him and that your relationship was nothing more than a memory of the worst mistake of his life. For a while that fear had been enough to paralyze him. He would rather miss you than find out that you didn't have feelings for him anymore.

Lately, however, the emptiness in his chest was getting bigger and bigger. Bucky missed you in every way it was possible to miss someone. He missed the electricity that coursed through his body when your fingers gently caressed his skin and the warmth that flooded his core when you whispered sweet nothings in his ear. He missed the sound of your voice and the incoherent gibberish he sometimes heard you whisper in your sleep. He needed you. You were the only person who could make him feel whole again because you had the other half of his heart.

All of a sudden Bucky stopped caring that you didn't feel the same way he did. He stopped worrying about the pain your indifference might cause him because he was convinced that nothing could be worse than the emptiness he was feeling right now. He had to try to fix things, he owed it to his heart. So he headed to your apartment without even bothering to call you first to let you know or find out if you would be there to greet him.

"Bucky?"you asked in confusion as you opened the door to find your ex-boyfriend on the other side. "What are you doing here?"

"You're going out" he mumbled, ignoring your question. His eyes traveled down your body, admiring you from head to toe. The blood from all over your body gathered in your cheeks, feeling embarrassed. Although you didn't know if it was due to the revealing outfit you were wearing or the fact that your ex-boyfriend, who you were still not over, had caught you at that moment.

"Yeah, we broke up, remembrer?" you said defensively to silence the guilt that was beginning to cloud your mind as you saw the sadness in Bucky's eyes. You hadn't even wanted to go out in the first place. Your friends, tired of watching you suffer for your ex, decided it was time for you to try to put your life back together. You didn't feel ready yet, your heart was still beating for Bucky, but your friends had insisted and you couldn't refuse."What are you doing here?" you repeated your question, your voice pulling Bucky out of the trance his own thoughts had put him in.

"Did we do the right thing? When we broke up, I mean. Was it the right thing to do?" he asked with eyes full of doubt.

"Bucky..." you trailed off. It was not the right time to have that conversation. You were in the hallway of your apartment and your friends could show up at any moment. But you couldn't say no to him when you had asked yourself that same question a thousand times.

"Just... Please, tell me that you never thought about it, that you never wondered if we did the right thing. Tell me you are completely over me and I'll walk away and you'll never see me again."

"Bucky, I..." It was the only thing you managed to say. You couldn't answer him. You knew you weren't over him, but you weren't sure if telling him was a good idea. As much as it hurt, you had broken up for a reason and nothing assured you that things would be any different now. You couldn't give in to your heart's desires knowing that it would bring you more pain in the future. But at the same time the thought of never seeing Bucky again made your heart clench with sadness.

He seemed to read the conflict in your expression. He saw the hesitation in your eyes. And hidden behind the clouds of doubt he noticed a familiar sparkle that made his heart race. It was the sparkle of love, the one he noticed in your eyes when your gaze connected after sharing a kiss or when he complimented you. The tension in his shoulders disappeared completely, relieved to discover that you were just as screwed as he was.

He took a step toward you and you didn't pull away. You bit your lip hesitantly causing Bucky's eyes to travel to your mouth. He admired your lips for a moment before returning his attention to your eyes. Then you noticed that his pupils had grown. The air caught in your throat, recognizing what the expression on Bucky's face meant. You knew full well what was about to happen and yet you did nothing to prevent it. Bucky gave you time to protest or say something to stop him before he acted on his desires. But you did nothing. You longed for what was about to happen as much as he did, so when Bucky leaned closer to you you just closed your eyes, letting him bring your lips together in a desperate kiss.

You lost yourself in the softness of his lips, reveling in the electricity that coursed through your body at the mere touch of his hands on your face. You clung to his body, letting him guide you into your apartment while you focused all your attention on memorizing the taste of his mouth. Bucky pushed you against the door after closing it, taking the opportunity to press his body against yours. He bent his head to deepen the kiss and you let out an involuntary moan, enjoying his closeness. His scent assaulted your nostrils as his fingers caressed every inch of skin at his disposal. Your brain short-circuited, completely overwhelmed by the sensations Bucky aroused in your body. You could only respond to his demanding lips that moved desperately against yours.

You had missed Bucky so much, dreamed so many times of feeling his kisses on your skin again, that the experience didn't feel real. You were afraid to open your eyes and discover that it was all a figment of your imagination. But the intensity with which your heart was beating told you that you were not in a dream. Bucky really was there, kissing you as if his life depended on it.

You groaned when his lips parted from yours, though you took the opportunity to catch your breath. Luckily you didn't have to complain much as Bucky's lips made contact with yours again. It was a simple, quick brush of lips before moving down your jaw all the way to your neck, leaving a trail of wet kisses. Your fingers lost themselves in his hair, tugging at the brown locks as he sucked a mark just below your ear. Bucky grunted in response and you felt your legs go limp. You'd forgotten how much you loved hearing him make those sounds.

"God, I missed you" he murmured against your skin in a hoarse voice and your heart skipped a beat. The sound of his voice was intoxicating, but his lips had more power over you. And when he parted them from your skin to speak, the spell he cast over you was broken. Slowly your brain regained its cognitive abilities, remembering the reasons that had led you to that situation in the first place.

"Wait, stop. We can't do this" you suddenly exclaimed, acting against every fiber of your being. At your words Bucky immediately pulled away from you, though he kept his hands resting on your hips. "We broke up for a reason, Bucky. It didn't work before so why would it work out now?"

"Because I'm gonna make it work. I don't care what I have to do, I would do anything to get another chance. These last few months without you have been hell and I would do anything to never feel that way again" he replied with such conviction that he almost managed to convince you. Almost.

"I don't want you to sacrifice your life for me, Buck. We talked about this already. Your work as an Avenger is important for so many reasons..." you murmured sadly, remembering the many talks you' d had in the past about it.

"None of that matters if I don't have you by my side," he interrupted you."I love you, Y/N, and I'm sorry we had to break up for me to realize it.. But now that I know I'm willing to do anything to make us work. I need you with me, Y/N. You complete me."

Bucky's words brought tears to your eyes. He sounded so sincere, so desperate, and you felt it deep in your soul. You knew very well what he meant when he said that you completed him because you felt exactly the same way about him. You complemented each other in a special way, it was as if you had finally found the missing piece of the puzzle that was your life. But you hadn't realized it until you lost it again. Nothing had felt right since you and Bucky broke up. For a long time you had thought that emptiness was part of the grieving process, but now that you heard Bucky put the same feeling into words you understood what it really was: love. You felt strange and empty inside because you had lost the other half of your heart.

"I love you too, Buck" you said softly before you joined your lips in a kiss again. It was a much slower kiss than the previous ones. Your lips moved gently, allowing yourself to enjoy the moment. You cupped his face with your hands as he pulled you closer to him by the waist. You melted into the warmth of his arms, savoring the moment. When you separated you kept your eyes closed for a moment, resting your forehead on his. As you opened them you found his deep blue eyes studying your expression and you were unable to contain the smile that formed on your face. You really had missed this kind of intimacy with him.

"Okay, let's try this one more time."

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x yn

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noteguk · 4 years

Text

devilish | kth | m

— summary; in which Taehyung has a bit too much fun toying with your limits.

— contents and warnings; pwp, smut, Taehyung x reader, established relationship, edging, guided masturbation, dirty talk, corruption kink, sliiiight dumbification, dom!tae, mentions of past virginity loss, mentions of blowjobs, mirror, begging, orgasm control, praise kink, use of the word “slut”, cockwarming, unprotected sex

— words; 2,4k

— author’s note; this request has been sitting in my askbox since forever because I was stuck with the last version of it. Eventually I deleted that document and completely changed the plot (or lack thereof), and now here we are. I really like corruption kink so :) this was a nice ride

Requested by anon!

Taehyung was almost convinced that you were the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

Granted, he was biased. He had been dating you for some time now, but, in his defense, he was positive that the wind had been knocked out of him (how cliche) the first time he had laid eyes on you. And it all went downhill from there. Taehyung became a bit more crazy about you every time he saw you, paid a bit more attention to the small details that he might have missed before — the way you played with your hair, the shy tug of your lips every time he made a flirtatious remark, the fluttering of your eyelashes when you leaned away after a kiss. It was all beautiful, perfect, created by angels just for him. And he loved every second of it.

It was just a matter of time before his little obsession leaked into the bedroom and Taehyung didn’t hesitate to make good use of it. Even if you were a bit embarrassed by it, always so shy, Taehyung liked to watch you play with yourself as he told you what to do: where to touch, how to move, when to stop. And you were always so good for him — following his orders eagerly, giving him more every time he asked you to.

You were so, so perfect that he thought he was dreaming. He couldn’t have wished for a better girlfriend.

“That’s it, baby, take it slow,” his husky voice sounded next to your ear, one of his hands caressing your hair gently. You had your back pressed against his chest, sitting between his legs, with your own thighs open and pushed up to the level of your breasts. He could see everything like that. “So pretty. You’re always so pretty for me.”

Taehyung had his eyes zeroed in the reflection before you two, the large rectangular mirror presenting him with the glorious view of your flushed heat. He followed, mesmerized, as you circled your clit with two of your fingers, whining beautifully at your growing pleasure, back arching and eyes closing.

Taehyung was used to your body, how it reacted; he knew the telltale signs that your orgasm was getting closer. And that was the dangerous part. “Shhh, you’re almost there, baby,” he mumbled, the venom in his tone telling you that he would do it again — ask you to stop just as you were about to cum, making you cry and whine until he allowed you to start over. But then your pleasure was almost gone, and you had to build it back up from zero. “Look at you, you’re so desperate. You like playing with your little pussy?”

You nodded, a frail moan leaving your mouth. You could feel yourself clenching around nothing, begging to be filled up.

“You do? That’s so dirty,” he teased. Taehyung’s hands were resting on either side of his body now, supporting his weight. No matter how much you wanted him to touch you, you knew that he wouldn’t. He found much more satisfaction watching you do it. “Is that pussy wet for me, baby? Does it want to cum?”

“Yes, yes, please,” you implored, overwhelmed. Taehyung had made you edge yourself five times already, it had been going on for too long, and you didn’t think you could stop it again. You would try, though, of course you would, but you were afraid that your body wouldn’t respond in time. “I want to cum, Tae, please.”

He hummed, placing a wet kiss against the nape of your neck. Taehyung was breathing heavy, fighting against every cell of his body so he wouldn’t bend you over and fuck you full of his cock. He also had his needs, but his objective was to teach you some discipline. He needed you to need him.

“One more time for me, baby,” he said. His cock was unbearably hard inside his pants, leaking into his underwear as he heard the beautiful sounds of your soaked pussy. He was going insane thinking about how well it would wrap around him, how gorgeous you looked when you were full of his cock. “Stop it one more time.”

You almost cried out at his words. “N-No, I can’t,” you whined. You could feel your orgasm just about to overflow, your thighs shaking as you continued to rub your clit. “I can’t do one more.”

“Shhh, you can,” he calmed you down. Another kiss against your neck and you swore you were about to die. “Stop now.”

And you actually stopped, because you were such a sweet, obedient girl for him. Taehyung watched as your chest heaved, your eyes closing as you pulled your hand away from your pussy, a shaky moan of frustration leaving your lips as you let your orgasm slip away for the sixth time that afternoon. He felt his cock throb in his pants when he saw how soaked and puffy your cunt was for him, caught himself groaning out in hunger.

“That’s such an obedient slut,” he complimented, his voice a hoarse vibration against your shoulder. Taehyung knew you were on your limit, and he loved that, still, you followed what he told you to do. “You used to be such a good girl, baby, now look at you: edging that little pussy of yours, begging me to let you cum. That makes me so fucking hard.”

You could only whine, because your limbs had turned to jello and you didn’t think you could find your voice quick enough. Your own reflection stared back at you in the mirror — your skirt pulled up and panties brushed to the side, your heat dripping against the bed, making a mess that you were sure Taehyung would tease you about later. You didn’t know what had happened to you, it seemed as if your life had completely turned around ever since he had walked right into it.

And, as if he was reading your mind, Taehyung continued talking as your pleasure melted away.

“When I met you, you couldn’t even kiss me without getting shy,” he started, one of his hands leaving the bed and resting on your waist. Your body shivered at the warm contact, sensitive. “You were this timid little virgin, you hadn’t even touched yourself yet, baby. You didn’t even know how to.” Another kiss against your neck had you shuddering, hoping for more. “And now you are soaking all over my sheets like a good slut. You learned how to take my cock so well, didn’t you? I taught you well.”

You nodded, brain flooded with images from your past. Taehyung had always been drawn to your innocence, found his delight watching you discover your pleasure for the first time — rather, he loved teaching you, breaking that inexperience apart until he had you whimpering for more, embarrassed and needy, grinding your pussy against him just to feel something. He had turned you into a desperate little thing, an obedient girl that could cum just by playing with your tits, or that would start crying when it became too much — and still would ask him to keep going.

You were a giver: you liked to provide Taehyung with whatever it was that he asked you to, loved to be showered with his praises every time you made him cum. You liked to play up your innocence just to see how he reacted, weaponized your apparent cluelessness because you knew that he loved to show you how to do things. It was a perfect game that you two played, and it always ended up just like both of you wanted to.

Taehyung’s hand slithered up your stomach and groped your covered breast, pulling you out of your reveries. You pressed yourself closer to his chest, a shot of pleasure going straight to your core as his fingers brushed against your hardened nipple.

“Taehyung, please,” you begged once again, your voice a pathetic little thing, “let me cum.”

“My baby wants to play with her pussy again?” He asked, his voice an octave lower. You nodded. “Hm? Want to make that tight little cunt cum?”

“Yes, yes, please,” you were losing your mind, droplets of sweat running between your breasts. The bedroom was so hot, you felt like you couldn’t even breathe. “I need it so bad.”

He chuckled devilishly against your skin, his thumb grazing your nipple. “Alright, baby, you’ve been good,” Taehyung finally gave in, making you breathe out in relief. “But sit on my cock first.”

Your heart hammered against your rib cage, your pussy clenching in anticipation. “What?”

“You heard what I said, baby.” He removed his hand from your tit and used it to unzip his pants. The sound was harsh and loud, shooting straight to your dripping core. “Come on, I’m not very patient.”

Taehyung was patient, though, that was how he managed to edge you so many times without losing his cool. But you bought his act and moved forward so he could fumble with his pants, your eyes following his movements on the mirror as he pulled his cock free.

You sighed at the sight, your mouth watering with the thought of licking his cock clean. He was so hard and heavy, leaking all over himself, and if you weren’t so desperate to have him inside you, you would’ve turned around and sucked him like he had teached you, until you were crying and he was cumming down your throat.

“Don’t ride it. Just keep it in.” Taehyung shattered your dreams just as fast as he had built them, a frown covering your features as he placed his hands on your hips, pulling you towards him. “Keep my cock warm as you touch yourself, baby. Make a mess on it and I’ll think about fucking you, alright?”

Taehyung always had wonderful arguments, because that had you agreeing within a second. You struggled to place yourself over him, lining his tip with your entrance and, just as you were about to sink down, he stopped you.

“No, baby.” Taehyung placed his hand on your chin, tilting your head towards the mirror. “Want you to watch too.”

“I’ll watch,” you guaranteed, earning a soft smile in return.

You sat down on his member with ease, thankful for how absolutely soaked you were. Ever since Taehyung had taken your virginity, you realized that you would never get enough of that feeling — of his length stretching you wide open, hitting every spot and throbbing inside you. Back when you had your first time, you had been so flustered that you couldn’t even watch when Taehyung entered you and, now, you couldn’t tear your eyes away from your reflection, your hand clenching the hem of your skirt so it didn’t cover the view.

Behind you, Taehyung moaned out at the sensation, his eyes closing. “That’s it, baby, fuck.” He breathed out. “This pussy was made for me.”

And you felt the same, felt like the two of you were made to be together like that, a perfect match for one another.

Before you could react, his hands were back on your body, playing with your tits as you squirmed under his touches. The movement of your hips against him was automatic, filling the room with the sounds of your wetness and a beautiful whimper coming from your throat. “T-Tae, I’m…”

“Sit still,” he commanded, ignoring your shy requests for forgiveness. You managed to stop your body from moving, instead focusing on how perfectly he was buried inside you, his pelvis glued against your ass. “Didn’t you want to cum? So, go ahead. Play with your clit, baby.”

Another moan left you as he pushed your breasts together. “But I want to—“

“No, no. You already asked for what you wanted,” he interrupted. Taehyung’s eyes were hooded and dark, looking at you from the reflection like they were daring you to disobey him. “Play with your pussy for me, baby. Cum all over my cock. That’s all you’re gonna get for now.”

You agreed with a frail movement of your head, your fingers moving back to your sensitive nub. You coated them in your juices before pressing down on your clit, crying out in sensitivity as you started to rub yourself again. This time, with the feeling of Taehyung’s cock inside you, it was much easier to find where you had left off, your walls clenching dangerously tight around him as you searched for your high.

Taehyung continued to watch you, his gaze burning your body. He was biased, yes, but you were the hottest thing he had ever laid eyes upon. And he wasn’t ignoring the way you were moaning out his name, your perfect cunt clenching around his cock, the sweet smell of your perfume infiltrating his nose. All of you was perfect, handmade for him, and he was going insane knowing that you were all his.

“Gonna cum,” you warned, looking at him through parted lids. Taehyung, of course, knew that already. He knew your body better than yourself. “Can I cum?”

Taehyung smiled — you were so cute. He had already allowed you to and, yet, there you were, making sure his desires hadn’t changed. Even though you were about to break, you still needed his permission. “Of course, baby,” he said. “You’ve been so patient. So perfect for me. You can cum whenever you want.”

He could not even blink when you finally tipped over the edge, your pussy gushing down on his cock and pulsating around it as you finally — finally! — found your high. Taehyung knew all those small mannerisms already — the opening of your lips, the rolling of your eyes, the high pitch of your voice — but he couldn’t help but feel like he was experiencing them for the very first time.

And as you came down from your moment of euphoria, your thighs jittery from overstimulation, Taehyung had erased every single doubt from his mind: you were, undoubtedly, the most precious, beautiful thing he had ever seen.

#bts smut #taehyung smut #bts x you #bts x reader #reader insert #kim taehyung #taehyung x you #taehyung x reader #smut #pwp #drabble #smut drabble

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dreamcatcherrs · 4 years

Note

streamers finding out youre pregnant?

the mcyts reaction to finding out their s/o is pregnant

+ this is a reaction to if you had been wanting to get pregnant, and that you and the specific mcyt had been wanting this for a while. so only fluff, no angst :) I can do an angst version, though?

dream:

after you told him the amazing news his whole face just lit up

he’d lift you up in the air

and spin you around

would set you down and then give you a big fat kiss on the lips

“I’m gonna be a dad?”

you don't think you'd ever seen him that happy before

he’d tell everyone almost immediately

and would want to go out and buy a bunch of baby stuff

just to be ready

would shower with you in the bath tub

with, like, a specific bath bomb you'd mentioned before

and washes your hair for you

always has an eye on you

and doesn't want you lifting heavy stuff

ever

won't let you do anything that contains more work than lifting a finger

very protective over you

georgenotfound:

would be really surprised at first

just imagine the grin on his face

I mean, he would be smiling till his cheeks started aching

pulls you into a hug and kisses the top of your head

“this is crazy. I just…I can't wait.”

would make sure you go for walks together

because he says then your baby will learn the area quicker

and you explain that the baby can't actually see out of your stomach

but he just brushes it off

will rage eat with you

just buys a bunch of fast foods and eats if with you

whilst simultaneously making sure you're eating all of the right things

he literally has a list of foods you should eat

speaking of lists, he also has a list of names

boy and girl names

he’s just so excited to be a dad

sapnap:

“are you serious?”

would punch the air in happiness

and then hug you tightly

but not too tightly cause he'd be afraid to hurt the baby

even though there wasn't really a baby yet

would take so much care of you

you need a snickers bar?

he’ll buy every single candy in the world

your back is hurting?

he’ll be your personal massager

or he’ll get you one

he’ll take days off just to be with you and the growing baby

LOVES touching your belly bump once you get one

and will definitely be talking to it

and calling the baby “he” because he is so convinced that it's going to be a boy

he’s cute or whatevuh😩

badboyhalo:

“you’re pregnant?!”

immediately gets on his knees and rests his forehead against your stomach

“that’s my little baby in there... I can’t believe it, pumpkin.”

gives you kisses all over your face

he will always remind you of how beautiful you are

and how you have a natural glow to you now that you’re pregnant

and he tells you how much he loves you all the time

and that he’s so excited to have a baby with you

makes sure you’re fed all the time

because now there has to be enough for 2 people

also makes sure not to eat the things you can’t eat during the pregnancy

would do everything for you and always looks out for you

technoblade:

when you told him the happiest smile broke onto his face

techno is a softie when it comes to you

so having a baby?

he is gonna be the sweetest dad is all I can say

hugs you and kisses you

he’s just in awe that he’s gonna be a dad soon

treats you like royalty

even if you're just calling for him because you're hungry

he will stop his stream and be with you for the rest of the day

or for multiple days if that's what you need

he’s still his usual techno self

(and by that I mean he still takes care of you quietly)

but you do feel his stares on you sometimes when you're doing literally nothing

like, even just when you're standing up from the couch once you have a bigger bump

he’ll be ready to be by your side if you need help

afraid you'd fall

very soft (but that’s just a fact we all know)

wilbur soot:

“really? baby, that's great!”

like dream, he’d spin you around

and then gently place a hand on your stomach

and just smile at you

he’d always be smiling

and makes sure you're never uncomfy

would buy you a special soft pillow

so you’d sleep better

he’d almost always have a hand on your bump

or look at it from a distance

wilbur as a dad is just🥺

would probably want a little girl

so he could braid her hair

(even if it looks horrible)

but nonetheless he’s just so happy to be a dad

skeppy:

I could just imagine him screaming “are you serious?”

he would then grab your face in his hands and then just stare at you

until his eyes gazed down at your stomach

he would be panicking

because he didn't know what to do

at the grocery store he would've made a list of things to get you

and would be running around trying to find them

has his eyes on you at all costs

“don't lift that!”

“are you trying to slip and fall?!”

even if you were literally just walking to the fridge

is a little scared about the whole birth thing

but doesn't want to scare you as well

so he just pushes it to the back of his head

because how bad can it really be?

for him, at least

would want to do a gender reveal as a youtube video

but only if you wanted to

very dramatic

but very loving

karl jacobs:

he would have his hand over his mouth when you told him

then starts laughing

“we’re gonna be parents?”

he’s honestly just so speechless

cradles your head in his neck and just smiles

almost cries

almost

he’s gonna be such a great dad

I mean have you see him with tucker?

he’s just so cute (yes, I’m a karl simp)

will rub your feet

or your lower back

or wherever you need to get those muscles loosened up

can get kinda scared sometimes

about the whole dad thing

but feels a lot better after talking to you about it

just like he makes you feel better, you make him feel better as well

buys cute little socks literally 8 months before the due date

bc he thinks they’re cute

fundy:

his surprised expression would slowly turn into a smile

would mumble out something in dutch

before hugging you so tightly

like, you actually had to say you couldn’t breathe for him to let you go

“I’m sorry baby, I’m just so happy!”

buys a bunch of baby stuff… the day after you told him

he just can't wait

always holds your hand during doctor’s appointments

and makes sure you're seated or laying down comfortably

especially once your bump gets big

talks to the baby through your stomach

so they can recognise his voice once you've given birth

always makes sure you feel beautiful

by complimenting you every day

multiple times

because if anything you look more beautiful than ever

will brush your hair

and brush his fingers through your hair

makes sure you feel loved all the time

quackity:

panic

as in pre-parental panic

but quickly recovers and tells you how fucking great it is that you're gonna have a baby together

and that he just can't believe he’s gonna have an actual baby with you

you bet he’ll be looking up tips for being a dad

he wants to do everything perfectly

and tries his very best to be there for you

does all of the chores

and still makes time for you

you'd get worried about him overworking himself

but when you tried to help him

he’d just make you sit down again

“you're not doing any work. too dangerous for little q.”

you'd accomplished making him stop doing all the work by luring him over with cuddles

he’d get you any food you wanted

fast food, healthy food

whatever you wanted, as long as you're always full, he’s happy

punz:

“really? you're serious?”

mans’ smile is brighter than the sun

pulls your shirt up to kiss your stomach all over

and then rests his hands on your hips and kisses you gently

“you're gonna be the best mom, you know that?”

like dream, he gets very protective of you

won't even let you get something that you can't reach by an inch

never drinks any liquor or coffee while you’re pregnant

because he knows you can't

highkey really loves your big bump

and tells you all the time

as well as how sexy you are

and will stay up late until you fall asleep

especially on those nights where it seems unbearable for you to fall asleep

the two of you would paint the room for the baby together after the gender was revealed

and then buy furniture that matches the room

he’d suggest exercises you could do for pain relief he’d seen on the internet

and even do them with you if that’s what you wanted

anything to make you happy

awesamdude:

HE’S SO HAPPY OMG

would cry if he wasn't so fucking excited

squeezes your hand

while putting a hand on your stomach

he can't wait to see the growth

he wants you to feel absolutely no stress

because he can't imagine the amount of emotions you must already feel with your baby growing inside of you

so he does everything for you to avoid that

and if you do feel stressed he suggests cuddles

then yoga for pregnant women

and then more cuddles

cooks delicious food for you

and buys cute little outfits for the baby

and tiny little shoes🥺

eret:

picks you up right then and kisses you

all over the place

“holy fuck, y/n. this is just… I’m so fucking happy right now.”

does literally EVERYTHING for you

laundry? he’s got it

dinner? he’s got it

waking up early because you can't sleep and then massages your shoulders because he's an absolute sweetheart? yep, he’s got it

fucking loves everything about you being pregnant

but he’s sure you don't like it just as much

I mean, you're the one who’s carrying a literal baby

so he believes it gets pretty goddamn hard for you sometimes

and therefore takes many breaks from streaming

just to hang out with you

you’d go to baby furniture stores together

until you found the perfect things

feeds you loads of chocolate

or ice cream

whatever you want, really

he discovers that he fucking loves pregnancy

hope you enjoyed this! never written something like this before, but it got me all soft…

________________________________

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turtle-steverogers · 2 years

Note

Off the post of Steve’s body image issues. Of course he has them! For all the reasons mentioned before and the fact that there’s times he looks in the mirror and doesn’t recognize who he sees. It’s so hard to conceptualize.

In addition to all of the things you mentioned (Steve showering in the dark, feeing dirty etc) I also think there’s times he starts scrubbing until he’s raw. Partly because he wants wants to feel clean, but also because the pain is familiar. And I can’t help but think of the first time Bucky sees this, the raw and bleeding skin and Steve blindly rubbing because maybe just a bit more will do it , and his heart completely breaking because he’s always found Steve beautiful and it pains him so much that Steve can’t see it. And Bucky gently takes the scrubby and holds Steve while he cries and he spends the rest of the night murmuring gentle words and tracing patterns onto Steve’s healing skin because maybe, just maybe, Steve will feel the love with them

Finally getting around to answering this, but yes! I've headcanoned this before, actually, and it's made its way into a fic a friend and I are working on (though, the circumstances in which he does this and why are partly body image related and partly feeling dirty due to other trauma).

That being said... I couldn't agree more. I think Bucky discovers it one night after Steve's had a nightmare, and he wakes to find the bed empty and the en suite light on. He can hear the shower running and steam is billowing under the door. Evidently, Steve has been in there a while.

When he goes to knock gently on the bathroom door, Bucky stops up short, hand freezing in front of the painted wood. There's a distinctly distressed sound coming from inside-- heavy breathing and... not quite sobbing. Biting his lip, Bucky battles between his instinct to break in and make sure Steve is okay and giving Steve privacy. His hesitation goes out the window, though, when he hears a pained hiss.

Knocking twice to warn Steve, Bucky calls out, "I'm coming in," before opening the door and slipping inside. Bucky freezes when he sees Steve, and Steve-- who's staring up at him with wide eyes-- does the same.

There's a washcloth in his hand and he's hovering it over his stomach, which is red and raw, much like the rest of his skin. There's angry, red marks all over his body where he's evidently pressed in harder, and his face is splotchy, hectic, red spots high on his cheeks.

"Oh my god," Bucky breathes, too in shock for a moment to reel in his reaction. Steve tenses, his entire body locking up as he drops the washcloth and crosses his arms at his chest. "Steve, you're--" Hurting yourself.

"Sorry, I'm sorry," Steve says, and Bucky manages to gather himself. He shakes his head, closes his eyes. Musters the strength to set aside his instinct to gather Steve out of the shower and protect him from whatever the hell is going on in his mind. Love on him until he can love on himself. Steve has never liked that sort of reaction, so Bucky tries to stay easy.

"No, no, it's--" It's not okay. He can't say it's okay. He won't lie. "Can I get you out?" Action. Action is better than trying to talk through whatever the fuck this is. Especially when Steve is still vulnerable-- chest heaving and body trembling. Fuck, the shower's got to be cold by now. "I'd love to get you to come back to bed."

Steve stares at him for a long time, and there's so much goddamn shame rolling off of him in waves, that Bucky can hardly tell how he'd missed it before.

After a suspended moment, Steve licks his lips. "Why?" he whispers, face screwing up. He looks down, shifts where he stands.

"Why what?"

"Why do you want me to-- I mean I was-- I'm so disgusting, and I look--" He cuts himself off, lips pursed and tears flowing down his cheeks.

Bucky steps closer, but doesn't touch. Instead, he reaches for Steve's towel and holds it open-- an invitation. Steve doesn't look at him yet, doesn't take the offer. But that's alright, Bucky thinks. The important thing is that it's there. The important thing is that Steve knows he's going to take him into his arms when he's ready.

"Because I love you, Steve," Bucky says, and it's simple as that. "And yeah, I'm worried. I wanna know what's going on, but first, I wanna make sure you're safe, yeah?" He cocks his head a little, smiling at Steve even though he can't see it.

He watches Steve battle with himself for a moment longer, then Steve is turning off the water and stepping out of the shower. He comes into Bucky's arms with a sob, and Bucky lets out a soft noise, wrapping the towel around his shoulders, being mindful of Steve's raw, sensitive skin.

"There we go," he murmurs, letting Steve melt into him. Letting Steve take what he needs. Giving all he has so Steve can feel that.

"I just feel so fucking gross," Steve sobs, and Bucky closes his eyes. Deep down, he'd always known Steve was harder on himself than he could ever comprehend, but to hear that he thinks of himself as so dirty-- so disgusting-- hurts.

He hauls Steve closer, rocking them side to side.

"I know, pal," he murmurs. "I know. But I love you, yeah? I love you even when you feel dirty. I love you even when you feel disgusting."

And it doesn't fix anything-- of course it doesn't. That part needs to come from Steve. But as he feels Steve lean into him trustingly, Bucky thinks maybe they can get him there. Together.

#this got away from me but im happy to be back with long thoughts #steve rogers #mikey answers #stucky #bucky barnes

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