#and he wint reply bc je is asleep
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boosterthisgold · 3 years ago
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I
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I'm gonna kill myself I'm gonna kill myself I'm gonna kill myself I'm gonna kill myself I'm gonna kill myself I'm gonna kill myself I'm gonna kill myself I'm gonna kill myself right here right now I'm gonna jump off of somewhere I'm gonna kill myself
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#tw repeating#tw suicide#tw vent#what did did dkenekdkenekwndkenekdkenekwndbdkenekdkenekwndkenekdkenekwndbdxzh2nudkenekdkenekwndkenekdkenekwndbdkenekdkenekwndkenekdkenekwnd#WHAY DID I DO#IM GONNA START CRYING#the past two days have been like not bad for us but not good and now im thinking he wants to leave me bc#i didnt kiss right fucking kill me shoot me i want to killl myself#i have extreme bpd u cant do this shit to me#and he wint reply bc je is asleep#usually we. sent hearts to eachother all the time and. whay. dehqgd whay dd i do im gonna actually kms#when ur fp makes u suicidal at 2 in the morning 🥰👍#i cant take this shit#tw death#my friend just died. he doesn't know that. but. im. imf e jjdnejjjdnejwwn#i woukd love it if i didnt have to deal w grief AND my boyfriend beijg a bitch in the same week thanks#he communicates directly. he said something i do that annoyed him and i will stop doing it.#but whay else. what djd i do. we had a not so good convo before that sure but. nothing worthy of thag#i cant do this shit. lol. lol lol lol lol if i dont relapse tonight im gonna be sooo shocked#4 hours more to go before he wakes up and potentially replies to me lollolololololololol#i wont hang out w him today bc. he hherhejwje bc i have to be w my friend but if i see him at scschool today and he is a bitch i will#postpone tto talk to him bc. wjat fid i do. yesterday he was like feeling bad in the morning then later he started kissing and hugging me#and it seemed fine?? i thought everythinh cooled down??? so before bed all i was thinking was how im gonna go early in the#morning to go see him bc he goes to school 30 minutes earlier i thought it was all chill??? what happened#if it was a joke how is it funny. he knows jow much anxiety i have over him being mad at me. he KNOWS that. i ask every 5 seconds#and he says he has no issue w it. so this isnt a joke.#help. ihfdzxgjvkitdvnjkjgcffyiojbvhjjjjihfxzzdd#oh great now im crying.
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