#and he just wants to believe theres a spark of something decent in her

[litlunacy]

So begins my attempt to recruit Minthara on a good run. With her insulting me. Lovely start.

Now turn around so I can knock you unconscious and steal your armor. You'll thank me later, I swear.

[lime-parfait]

Paranatural Parents: A Quick Analysis (Spoilers)

Please blacklist #long post for this because a “read more” will be unavailable if this blog were to be deleted in the future and it won’t be accessible.

Also no beta on this analysis

Anyways, been awhile since reading Paranatural seriously (ever since the story’s style changed to a text format it was harder to focus and read it). Anyways, there’s something that ‘clicked’ for me when reading some the recent pages. And it was simply that Paranatural is full of incompetent adults (no brainer). But specifically, it was full of incompetent PARENTS. Especially the ones who are involved in the whole world of spirits.

Okay, okay. Think about it. Isabel’s attitudes towards her family. The way that her grandfather finds ways to constantly point out her flaws and teaches her to use spirits as weapons. Isabel’s father, who we recently learned about, DOES want to care about his daughter, still chooses to be involved in the realm of spirits because he believes that Cherub’s words will help to make balance in the world. And yet, Isabel still doesn’t want to be around her father (based off the attitudes she has and it took a lot of strength for her to even ask her mom to drop her off). Isabel has something important to tell her father, but she reacts negatively when he doesn’t take her seriously. In a nutshell, Isabel has 2 guardian figures in her life who do not listen to her. Her grandfather wants her to be a disciplined warrior at the age of 12, while her father doesn’t seem to do his part in making communication between them easier.

Cody, his father was also involved in the Consortium. That man is a business man now and all he does is try to take property away from people. Back in the long (Jim the Brain)chapter, Cody is super hostile towards his father, who’s about to kill a spirit (because that’s what his father did back in the Consortium; stab spirits). Cody becomes cold and harsh, saying that the spirit was HIS to kill. Like, Cody took a deadly turn and it makes for a theory that his father taught him to be a cold-blooded killer towards spirits. But in the evidence, it’s vague why Cody feels this way towards spirits (we only got Davy saying that even though he wants to protect those he loves, Davy pulls out the ‘dad will take care of it’ card). Cody yells at him after that, forcing him to leave the school (due to vampire rules). It ‘s clear that Cody doesn’t his father to be on his turf  and that he can hold his ground at school (remember, he’s school president). But Davy and Cody have a family tension the involves in protecting what they care about from the ‘evil spirits.’ However, Davy probably failed really bad as a parent if Cody gave him death glares and yelled at him.

EDIT: another thing to consider is that Davy sees his son as a reflection of him (literally) and gets really pissed when Max counters his statement by saying that Cody isnt his mirror. clearly Davy cannot see his son as a son, but some sort of copycat that needs to follow in his footsteps.

Rick Spender (as an adult) is literally the worst at being a reliable person for the Spirit Activity Club, theres records of the way he failed to be there for most of the members. Failing to reassure and listen to Isabel and purposefully keeps isaac in the dark that sparked these two to fight each other because they were both hurting

Ed’s parents who were clearly part of the Consortium and they eventually met their doom WHEN Ed was BARELY 3 YEARS OLD. Ed’s parents weren’t there long enough to actually raise him and see him grow up. Like, they decided that it was okay to pass their kid off to a new guardian in the most nightmare fueled moments before they disappeared. They didn’t try to leave him have a happy memory, but planned to just erase themsleves from his memories??

There’s plenty of other parents who also failed to be decent parents in the story (they weren’t part of Consortium, but they existed and basically don’t look after their kids. Penny and her parents’ treatment towards her and the way they favored her brother. Where the hell is Isaac’s parents). But it seems that a lot of the adults who are deeply involved in the spirit’s world, often tend to overlook their own children. Most of them claim to want to protect their kids from it, only pushing them away and the kid feeling neglected. But in the end, working in the Consortium makes these parents see their own children as an after thought because they’re buried in this this work, only dragging their kids in the mess.

And let’s look at Max Puckett. His mother was part of the Spectrals and possibly in the Consortium. She must have seen this sort of cycle. All of these parents who had spectral kids and planned out their futures to live that sort of life. Isabel’s family planning for her to be a warrior. Ed’s parents accepting their doomsday fate as workers of the Consortium. Max’s mom looked at all of this and didn’t want that. She would not repeat this mistake as other parents of the Consortium. And you know what? She married Peter Puckett, a man who wasn’t a spectral, or a vampire, or a wealthy man. But here’s the thing that Peter Puckett had that every other parent lacked; emotionally availability and unconditional love and care.

Like, Dad Puckett didn’t give up on his kids when his wife died. He picked himself up and did everything to raise them. He accepts that Max is Max, a moody preteen. He gets into the same interest as he does (Insolent Children music) and get involved in his life. Yes, he seems like a manchild at first glance because of his happy attitude and not being that smart. But he can be serious about serious topics when needed. He takes both of his kid to a kids’ arcade in order to let them have fun and be able to ask if Max was being bullied in school. He doesn’t make it a joke either, Peter Puckett is direct and wants to make sure that Max wasn’t being bullied in school. Hell, Dad Puckett took Max to the hospital for a broken arm and everything and you see that his face was full of concern for Max’s well-being. He literally makes time just for his kids no matter what it is. Going to a concert? Yes. Going to the hospital and rushing to get there? Peter will not hesitate. Like, Dad Puckett found the strength to continuing being there for his kids after his wife died. He moved to a new town to begin a new life, he takes their physical and emotional health seriously, he is involved in their interests and he listens to his kids, he doesn’t put pressure on his kids’ futures, all he wants is for them to be happy and safe. No matter what bad happens, Dad Puckett will always make himself emotionally available for his kids.

EDIT: another thing that was interesting during a re-read was that Peter said that Max took after his mom in personality and humor, and honestly that checks out based on what we know about her. This contrasts to Davy treating his son as a mirror, but in reality, Cody is nothing like him. Basically saying that Mr. Puckett understands his son better than Davy assumes what Cody is.

Meanwhile, all of the parents of the Consortium are fighting against a doomsday and not actually thinking about what their kids need most is to be there for them.

To Mom Puckett: you chose the best husband who was more prepared to care about his children

[godofevrerything]

Hell Rising Chapter Four: Rin

I hated close knit neighborhoods. They were the most dangerous places to be in. Everyone knew everyone, and a stranger, especially a colored stranger, could be picked out in a second.

I looked around, feeling sick. The air smelled like exhaust and tar. Nothing like the clean air and spice from India.

The cargo ship had been suffocating. I had been running all around the ship for a week, in a constant state of panic.

It was a damn miracle that nobody tossed me overboard for trespassing.

I walked down the sidewalk as quickly as I could. The sooner I was out the the neighborhood, the better.

"You're not from around here, kid. What do you think you're doing?"

I jumped, fear pumping through me. But the question wasn't directed at me.

The security guard glared at the brunette boy in front of him. I ducked into the alley, and peaked out at the scene.

The boy was shaking. "I was j-just passing through, s-sir! I mean no h-harm, I swear!"

I felt a surge of empathy for the boy. He was taller than me, and several years older, maybe 17.

His blue gray eyes darted around in a panic. They swept to the alley and met mine, silently pleading me to help him.

I was conflicted. If I stepped out to help him, I'd get the brunt of the punishment. If the security was this gruff to a light haired, white boy, who knows what they would do to me.

But at the same time, if I helped him, he'd be in my debt. I could use him as my shield to get anywhere.

I drew in a breath.

Allah protect me.

I stepped out of the alley and plastered a relieved look on my face.

"Master, there you are!" I gasped. "Come along, the Madame will be furious if you aren't home for dinner!"

The guards head snapped to me, scowling darkly. "Are you this boys maid?"

I dropped into a low curtsy. "Sir, I am so sorry that the Master went astray. But we must go."

The guard took a step towards me, his eyes flashing. "What kind of damn brainless fool are you to lose your master? A stupid islander like you should know to keep close to their superior."

I bit back a yell. I shoved my hands into my pockets. I could feel the sparks crawling up to my wrist. No. I couldn't kill the guard. That would be the opposite of escaping quietly.

"Once again, I sincerely ap-"

"A cheap sorry, especially an apology from an islander doesn't change the fact that you superior has trespassed." he spat.

"Sir, do not speak to my maid that way."

We turned. The boy had drawn himself up to his full height. He was actually as tall as the security guard, if not, he was taller. But the scary thing was his cold eyes. All the nervousness was gone, replaced by a icy sense of confidence and superiority.

The security guard frowned. "It's a maid. She's not worth much."

"It doesn't matter." the boy scoffed. "She is my maid, and I do not tolerate anyone speaking to my staff that way."

Oh god. Didn't this kid know that people didn't think much about their staff? He was going to get us locked up for being decent.

"Also, if it's anyone who can speak to my staff that way, it's me. God knows how many times she screws up. And if her esteem goes too low, she won't be able to work as well." the boy added.

Well. Never mind.

For a long moment, the guard stared at us, his eyes narrowed.

Then he shook his head. "Go on then. Just remember to not loiter. And make sure to keep your staff in check." the guard addressed the boy.

The boy nodded. "Of course." he tossed a glare at me. "Now hurry up. If I'm late, you won't get any dinner tonight."

I gritted my teeth. Christ, he didn't have to be such an ass.

"Of course, Sir." I muttered.

We walked away from the guard as quickly as we could. I kept my head down, my heart in my throat. The boy was silent.

We made it a few blocks outside of the neighborhood when he spoke up.

"Um, thank you."

I glanced at him, raising my eyebrow.

He shifted, looking at anywhere but me. "For what you did back there. You, uh, saved me."

I scoffed. "Yeah, I know. And are you thanking the tree, or me?"

He looked at me, startled. "Huh? I'm thanking you?"

I smirked up at him. "Sounds like a question. And typically, you look at the person when you're thanking them."

He flushed. "Oh. Sorry."

I waved my hand. "Forget it. I don't need a thank you."

He frowned. "Then why were you making a big deal about it?"

I shrugged.

The boy swallowed. "So, I'm guessing that you need my help."

I chuckled. "Glad you brought that up. I'm going to need to travel with you."

He blinked. "Why can't you travel on your own?"

I sighed. "I could, but that would be extremely hard. I've traveled on my own for about a decade, and I can tell you; it's no picnic. You know that guard that you just talked to?"

He nodded.

"Well, imagine that you have to deal with that a hundred times a day, the harshness is ten times worse, and you don't ever have anyone like me to pop out and save you." I speared him with a look. "Now imagine dealing with that for every day, for a decade. Not pleasant, right?"

He shuddered. "No. But, if you've dealt with that for a decade, then why can't you deal with it for a bit longer?"

I groaned. "I can, but I don't want to. I mean, nobody would want to. And not to mention that if I slip up once, I'll be thrown in jail for life."

His mouth opened. "They're that harsh? Please tell me you're kidding!"

I smiled grimly. "Nope. Thats my life. I mean, the guard was awful to you, and you're white. I'm Indian, and not to mention, a girl."

He drew in a breath. "Alright. I'll help you. I have two tickets to Missouri. The train leaves at noon."

I grinned. "Great, lets go."

His eyes widened. "What? But you don't even know my name!"

I snorted. "So? Names don't matter to me. People come and go. No use trying to remember them. It's not like they're remember me."

He stared at me.

I sighed. "Look, are you coming or not?"

The boy held his hand out to me.

I frowned. "What are you doing?"

"It's a handshake." he said.

I glared at him. "I know that. But theres no point. It doesn't matter."

He shook his head. "It matters to me. Come on, it'll only take a minute."

I stared at his hand and sighed. I shook it quickly. "There, happy?"

He sighed. "That wasn't a proper handshake."

"It doesn't matter. You'll forget me anyways." I sneered.

He shook his head. "No, I won't."

I sighed. "Liar."

He frowned at me. "Are you always this cynical?"

I chuckled. "It's called being realistic. And since I don't think you'll stop asking, my name is Saundrine. But call me Rin."

He smiled. "I'm Ivan."

I glanced back at Ivan. He was just as innocent now as he was five years ago. He had become more confident, I supposed, but he still had the optimistic innocence.

I kept telling him that the world wasn't good. People died every day and the ones who lived came and went. Few stuck around, and most hurt you. If he had went around without me, I had no doubt that he'd be locked up in a lab by now. He'd probably blatantly flirt with some man, and the officials would drag him away.

He wore his heart on his sleeve. And never held his tongue.

I sighed. He was going to get killed someday if he didn't watch himself.

Rana squeezed my hand. "What are you thinking about, Sunshine?"

I drew in a breath. "When I first met Ivan. He's just as oblivious to the world as he was back then."

Rana smiled. "Cute. I'm just glad that you two didn't meet like Darcy and I met. Wouldn't want you to have nightmares like me."

I sighed. "That makes the two of us."

Kai tugged on my hand. "Amma?"

I looked at him. "Yes?"

"My feet are tired. Can you carry me, please?" he asked.

I chuckled. "Sure."

I put Kai on my shoulders. He yawned and lay his head on top of mine. I glanced at Rana. Sabrina was curled in her arms, fast asleep. I couldn't imagine the toll it took on them to escape the hotel. No wonder why they were exhausted.

We walked through the city, keeping our heads down. Ivan and Darcy were walking behind Rana and I, something they never did. They always walked in front of us, to sort of shield us from any officials. But now I supposed the roles became switched.

"-Johnson and Ivan Stravinsky. The two young adults not only destroyed their hotel room and grievously injured our police force, but have also been helping two convicts to flee from the law."

My head snapped up. There, on a TV screen in a shop window, were Darcy and Ivan's faces. Right on the news.

"That's right, Dan." the reporter continued. "Johnson and Stravinsky are reported to have helped the escaped convict Namarana Ishimi and a young woman. Ishimi is also reported to have two young children with her, and has been dragging them all around the country. It is unclear if the young women is Ishimi's accomplice or captive. Now, let's hear from David Ricker, the head of the police force."

"Ricker." Rana snarled.

Ricker appeared on the screen, wearing an oily smile. "Thank you Lindsay. I believe that Ms.Johnson and Mr.Stravinsky were simply brainwashed by Ishimi. They were two good young people who Ishimi manipulated into helping her. Nevertheless, they did cause considerable property damage, and not to mention the damage done to our fine police force."

"Well what were we supposed to do, you sick bastard?" Rana growled. "Let them kill us?"

"Rana, quiet." I hissed.

She exhaled angrily, her eyes trained on the screen.

I glanced back at Darcy and Ivan. They were stock still, their faces white. To my horror, there was a small crowd surrounding us, listening to the news.

"I truly believe that Johnson and Stravinsky can become sane again if they simply turn themselves in." Ricker sighed. "We have plenty of outstanding psychologists and medics who can help them through the trauma that Ishimi put them through. And once she is taken care of, I truly believe that the city will be safe again. For she is the reason of the unrest in the city."

"You sick son of a-" Rana hissed.

I stomped on her foot, cutting her off. She glared at me, and I glared back.

"Is there anything that you'd like to say to Ishimi, sir?" the reporter asked.

"Absolutely."Ricker chuckled. "Ishimi, I suggest that you turn yourself in. You've terrorized the country enough, and even manipulated innocent people into helping you. Turn yourself in, or we will be forced to drag you into government custody."

"Forced, my ass." Rana mumbled.

Luckily, nobody seemed to hear her.

"Come on." I muttered. "We've heard enough, let's go."

I grabbed Rana and Kai's hand, pulling them out of the crowd. Darcy and Ivan followed us, silent.

We made it two blocks before Darcy spoke, her voice shaky.

"You know, I always wanted to be on TV when I was little. But this is not what I meant."

Ivan shook his head. "None of us did."

Kai spoke up. "Haha, why were they saying all that stuff about you?"

Rana didn't answer, choosing to stare down at Sabrina in her arms.

"Haha doesn't want to talk right now, Kai. But don't mind what that man on TV said. He was lying." I whispered.

"But why was he lying?" Kai asked.

I shook my head. "Because he is evil. That what evil people do. They lie all the time to make themselves look like heroes. And they paint the real heroes as villains."

"That's awful." Kai whispered. "Can I kick him?"

"Yeah, I'll join you." Rana muttered.

"No, Kai. Kicking him won't solve anything." I sighed.

"But it would make me feel a hell of a lot better." Rana scoffed.

"It still won't change anything." I sighed. "If it would, trust me, I would have beat him black and blue already."

Rana let out a weak laugh.

We walked into a bookstore, ducking into the back isles.

I turned to Darcy. "In the cab, you said that you had a friend who would help us. You said she'd meet us here."

Darcy blinked. "Oh. Yeah."

"Yeah?" I asked. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Hi guys. Glad you made it out."

We turned. A girl approached us, smiling faintly. She was a bit younger than Rana, with short pastel pink hair.

Rana stared at her, frowning. The girls eyes were silver, and they flashed slightly when she looked at Rana.

"Something on my face?" she asked.

Rana blinked. "What? Oh no."

"Great." she sighed.

"Guys, this is my friend, Jae." Darcy said. "Rana, you've already met her when she took care of the kids. And Ivan knows her. Rin, Jae. Jae, Rin."

I nodded. "Hello."

"Hiya." Jae chuckled.

She turned to Darcy. "So are we going or not?"

"Going?" Rana asked. She held Sabrina a bit tighter, her eyes narrowed.

"Yeah, to the safe place." Jae snorted.

"Safe place?" I repeated.

"Well, one of them."

Darcy frowned. "Jae, you've never mentioned safe places."

Jae laughed lightly. "Ah, well. I've only known you for what, nine months? I couldn't trust you yet. Y'know how people turn your trust against you."

"I can relate." Rana muttered.

They shared a grim smile.

I frowned. "You said that there were multiple safe places. Why haven't we heard of any of them?"

Jae sighed. "Practically nobody knows about them. We have to be extremely careful about letting people know about the safe places. They're all connected, so if one wrong person hears about them, the government will be able to connect and destroy all of the safe places in a whole state. And then the ones out of the state."

"That's dumb." I muttered.

Jae glared at me. "Excuse me?"

"That all of the safe places are connected. I mean, every safe place shouldn't be shut down just because one is discovered. Really, at the most it should be all the safe places in a city connected. Not all in the state. And even if they're just connected in the city, it's idiotic." I scoffed.

Jae sneered at me. "Well, you aren't in charge of the safe places. So could you please shut your mouth and listen to me. Like you said, you didn't even know that they existed."

"Do not talk to Rin like that." Rana snapped. "You might know more about the safe places, but that only proves that you don't have as many street smarts."

Jae's mouth opened slightly. She stared at Rana in shock. Rana glared at her.

"Ummm... So, what about the safe place?" Darcy squeaked.

Jae looked her, lips pursed. "It's hidden. Follow me."

"Oh, so we're just supposed to trust you without any evidence that you're telling the truth?" Rana asked.

Jae paused. "I am telling the truth. I would never lie to you."

"We only met you today." I sighed. "We don't trust you."

Her eyes flashed. "You don't trust me. Darcy and Ivan trusts me."

Ivan raised his eyebrow.

"Is there a problem here?"

We all whirled around. There was young man standing a few feet from us.

"What?" Rana whispered.

"I asked if there is problem." the young man said. "You all are quite loud and rude. Also,"

He paused and frowned at Kai and Sabrina. "Children aren't allowed in the library."

"What are you talking about?" Darcy asked. "Libraries are for everyone."

He scoffed. "Well, they are not for people who aren't mature enough to take their private matters outside."

"Oh, and they are for people who stick their noses into other peoples private matters?" I scoffed.

The young man sputtered indignantly.

Rana shot me a glare and gave the man a sweet smile. "I'm terribly sorry for the disturbance, sir. We didn't mean to be this loud."

He sniffed. "Well, you have been."

Jae smiled. "We meant for it to be a small discussion, but it got," she paused, searching for a phrase that wouldn't have the man be suspicious.

"out of hand." Rana finished. "Truly, we apologize for the disturbance. And we'll be right out of your hair."

The man frowned at us. "Hold on, have I seen met you?" he asked.

He asked Darcy.

She froze. "What? N-no. Why?!"

Rana laughed quietly. "We've never seen you in our lives. Now if you'd excuse us,"

He shook his head. "No, I know I've seen you two."

He pointed at Darcy and Ivan.

They froze.

"Well, my two friends are stunt doubles!" Jae chirped. "You probably recognize them for a show."

"Yeah, they've had to stand in for some actors as well." Rana chuckled. "I'm so proud of them."

She gave Ivan and Darcy a bright smile.

The man frowned uncertainly. "No, I've seen them somewhere-"

He winced suddenly, grabbing his head in pain.

Rana frowned. "Are you alright?"

"Headache." he mumbled.

"Ah, well we'll just get out of your hair then." Jae chuckled.

She grabbed Darcy and Ivan's hands, slipping out of the mans view.

"Yes, we'll get going now." Rana said brightly. "After all, dealing with strangers might worsen your headache. And I know how bad headaches can get."

She grabbed Kai and my hand, rushing out of the bookstore before he could answer.

We met Jae, Ivan and Darcy a few blocks down.

"That was close." Jae croaked. "We have to get you to the safe place now."

"Then let's get going." Rana snapped.

They started walking down the sidewalk. All of them, without a single question or complaint.

I rushed after Rana and grabbed her arm. She jumped, glaring at me. I didn't care. I took Sabrina from her arms and gave the baby to Darcy. I told Kai to go walk with Ivan. He listened, and I went back to Rana.

"Rin, what the hell?" Rana demanded.

"Keep your voice down." I hissed.

She glared at me furiously.

"Why are you trusting Jae?" I whispered. "You don't know anything about her! For all you know, she could be leading us right to the Admin!"

"Jae is Darcy's friend." Rana whispered. "I trust Darcy's judgement."

"Darcy's judgement is what got us wasted in a dumpster and covered in hot sauce in Houston!" I snapped.

"Don't bring that up." Rana scowled. "I don't ever want to think about Houston. And I trust her judgement with people, not alcohol."

"Are you kidding me? Darcy is the type of person to trust a serial killer in the middle of the woods!"

"That's Ivan." Rana corrected.

"And," she hesitated. "I trust Jae. There is something about her that makes me trust her."

"What?!" I yelped.

"Look, if you can't trust Jae, then trust my judgement. You can do that, right Rin?" she asked.

I frowned. "Of course I trust you, but-"

"Great." she interrupted. "Now let's get going before the Admins men come back and try to kill us again."

"I second that." Jae called out.

"Were you eavesdropping?" I snapped.

"Nah, just heard the end bit." Jae chuckled. "Now hurry up."

We went down the street and ducked into an alley. I held onto Rana's hand tightly, frowning at Jae's back.

She yanked the manhole up and grinned at us. "Come on."

Jae dropped into the hole.

"No! Hell no. I am not climbing down into a sewer!" Darcy yelped.

Rana pulled her hand from mine and scooted into the hole. "Then enjoy getting pumped full off drugs and endless interrogation."

She disappeared from view.

Ivan hesitated and then went after her.

"Kai, sweetheart, come on down! I'll catch you!" Rana called up.

"Kai, no." I hissed.

He hesitated.

"Come on Kai, we got to move!"

"Come on, Amma." Kai said. "Haha will catch us."

"Kai?!" Darcy yelped.

He climbed down in the damn hole.

Darcy leaned over the hole. "Um, can I drop Sabrina down?"

I stormed over to Darcy. "Absolutely not. Drop her down that hole and I'll push you in."

"Don't listen to Rin!" Rana yelled. "Drop Sabrina. She won't push you in here, don't worry."

"Darcy." I hissed.

She dropped Sabrina.

And climbed down instantly.

I dropped to my knees and looked down the hole, my heart nearly beating out of my chest. What if Rana didn't catch Sabrina? What if Kai didn't get down alright? Why didn't I hear him? Why didn't I hear Ivan? Were they de-

"Got you, Sabi!"

I heard Sabrina squeal in delight, and Rana laughed. I heard Kai talking to Sabrina, and Ivan helping Darcy down.

Thank you Allah.

"Rin, come on!" Rana called. "We have to go. Hurry up!"

I swallowed. If Jae was leading us into a trap, well....

She was going to regret it.

I swung my body into the hole and yanked the cover closed. I climbed down the ladder as quickly as I could.

Rana grinned and gave me a quick peck. "There you are! Thought you weren't coming, Sunshine!"

I shook my head. "As if I would let my family walk around with a stranger."

Jae groaned. "We get it, you hate me. Now let's get going."

"Hate you? I don't-" I started.

But she was already walking away.

Rana grabbed my hand. "Come on, Sunshine. You can fry her if it's a trap, don't worry."

"How can I not worry?" I sighed.

We went down the sewer, holding hands in the dim light. Eventually, Jae stopped in front of a wall. She kicked the bottom of it.

"What are you-" Rana started.

A panel appeared on the wall. Jae leaned in and spoke quietly.

"It's Jae. I have some newbies with me. Darcy Johnson, Ivan Stravinsky, Namarana Ishimi, and-"

She glanced at me.

"Saundrine Iago." I said.

"- Saundrine Iago." she finished.

For a moment, nothing happened. Then there was a rumble. And the wall opened.

We stepped inside.

My mouth dropped open.

It was a huge pavilion, with hundreds of tent and booths. Everything was colorful. Voices filled the air.

Happy voices.

Jae grinned.

"Welcome to the Haven."

[notedchampagne]

Please explain the gay trifecta I love it and need to know more

okay so first of all the similarities that combine dirk vriska and catra under the same umbrella is that all of them are deeply complex morally gray characters that have sparked discourse about how “good” they are under at least one point in time. also theyre all gay and self loathing

but now for the distinctions which tbh are more (five bc its my fave number) bullet points but anyway*:

vriska- 1) hates herself but masks it up with so much ego and pride its really hard to find the line of where one begins and where one ends, so much that vriska believes it herself too 1b) wants to be recognized as the Best TM. like thats it 2) pushes her abilities to their extent for the purpose of being the best version of herself as she can be (alt. to mimic her ancestor but mostly for her own full potential) and also to prove herself right 3) will ALWAYS believe shes right. if you think she isnt right shell kill you 4) is mean because she has to have a vaccine for being nice before she even says something not mean. its a part of her charm 5) chaotic disaster gay

catra- 1) loves herself the most out of the three, but she still hates herself not bc of her identity but mostly bc shes not being appreciated/respected for what she can to for her potential. also bc she feels like shes never good enough and wants to prove that bit wrong 1b) she wants to be/ be recognized as someone who deserves something, whether it be love or power she wants to earn it 2) pushes her abilities because to their extent of proving she can do anything. she wants to prove you wrong and to prove herself right 3) will believe shes right but will prove it to you by fighting or threatening you 4) is mean because she has trust and separation issues and also because shes a little >:3c fiesty. were only 2 seasons in but i know this deep down in my bones so fight me 5) disaster chaotic gay (this is different from chaotic disaster gay)

dirk- 1) hates himself with a bitter passion to the point that his introspective points and reflections are more just self loathing 1b) wants to be/ be recognized as like, a decent guy deserving of love and not the scum of the earth 2) pushes his abilities to their extent for the purpose of him being just completely stupid. i mean theres something about ultimate self in there but really its so polluted with his loathing and a bunch of other meta that im really not the best to tune up on but tldr hes dumb and doesnt think before he does things 3) always thinks hes right until somebody slaps him upside the head and the he goes into a pit of “ive made every mistake ever and im always so so so wrong” until somehow he gets over it and the cycle begins again 4) doesnt know hes being mean until the damage has been done 5) disaster gay

*disclaimer please dont come to me with discourse/corrections ive only sipped a little bit of the dirk and vriska tea and chugged like 10 gallons of respect catra juice this is funsies. just for funsies

edit: I ALMOST FORGOT. if you want to find out where you lean on the scale listen to oh no! by marina and the diamonds. if you feel sad and remorseful youre dirk leaning, if you feel powerful and full of hubris youre vriska leaning, and if you feel like you wanna clock somebody and prove your worth no matter what youre catra leaning

[sky-scribbles]

Hello, hello! For that ever fun Inquisition Ask Meme, could you do 3 & 4 for Elera, and 9 & 14 for Talan? :3

This’ll be good, thanks for asking! *cracks knuckles* Putting this below the cut, ‘cause it turned out long.

3. What is their first impression of their companions?

For Elera Lavellan, the blind Dalish dreamer mage.

With Cassandra, it was initially hostility - Chantry humans were the kind of people Elera had always been warned to stay away from, and this one was not only accusing her of mass murder but touching her without permission. (Word of advice: if you want Elera to like you, always ask for permission to touch her. She’s OK with being touched, she just hates not knowing that it’s coming.) Once Cassandra allowed her to have a weapon and showed willingness to believe that she was innocent, she softened her opinion somewhat, though she remained wary for a time.

Solas earned her instant respect for his knowledge of complex magic, and for his magical abilities. Elera saw him as the one figure in the first battle that she could trust (erp), since he was a fellow elven apostate surrounded by Chantry servants, and in the aftermath, where he revealed his knowledge of the Fade and affinity for spirits, her respect for him was cemented. A heartbreaking best-friendship was born.

She liked Varric right away for his jokes, and was curious about him, having never really interacted much with a dwarf before. She also knew he was linked to the Champion, too, and was eager to know more.

Vivienne won her respect for her command of magic, and for having the calm, emotion-masking grace that Elera tries to have herself… though it was mingled with the suspicion that a Dalish mage is naturally going to have for a Circle loyalist. She had no idea why in the Creators’ name anyone would want to be in a Circle - though she was willing to listen and try to understand.

With Sera, it was originally a sort of scholarly curiosity - ‘so this is what an elf becomes without any elven culture to guide them?’ Thankfully, she didn’t voice that aloud, and she was also rather amused by Sera’s spirit and odd way of phrasing just about everything. The spark of an amazing unlikely friendship was born.

Bull, she had no idea what to make of at first - whatever she expected a qunari to be like, this wasn’t it. Suspicious of his status as Ben-Hassrath but willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. Elera pretty much made up her mind not to form any first impressions of him, but wait until she had a chance to talk properly to him - the only thing she really took away from their first encounter was approval of his obvious love for his men.

With Dorian, she was very curious to see what a human mage who lived free and embraced their magic was like. She was wary - Tevinter and elves aren’t exactly best friends - but she could tell he was on their side, so she put her mistrust aside for the time being.

Things were so mad when she ran into Cole that she didn’t have much time or energy to form a solid impression, but she could tell instantly that he was a spirit - he had a sort of feel of the Fade about him - and that made her instantly predisposed to like him and trust him.

And Blackwall?

So much was decided in that moment where he held up his shield to block that arrow that would have killed her. She was prepared to like him already, because a) Wardens are Dalish allies, and b) she’d talked to Giles the farmer in the Crossroads and listened to him singing Blackwall’s praises. And then the guy blocked an arrow meant for her. 

She’ll never admit it, but Elera is terrified of how easily she could just be killed without any idea that it was coming. This man stepped forward to stop it from happening, even though they were strangers. He didn’t draw attention to the fact that he’d done it, either, which might well have embarrassed her. What he was doing with his temporary conscripts impressed her immensely, too - and then the icing on the cake was when he offered to help her, and not for any personal agenda. Just to help.

It wasn’t love at first sight. Heck, it would be impossible for Elera to have love at first sight. But it was definitely the spark of something close.

Ugh, that became long.

4. Where does your Inquisitor spend most of their time in Haven? In Skyhold?

In Haven, Elera actually spent most of her time in Solas’s little hut. The two of them spent hours talking about the Fade and spirits, occasionally making forays into the Fade, and as they became closer friends, he even read to books from her. She also spent a decent amount of time down in the tavern talking to Sera - and, of course, outside the smithy, chatting with Blackwall about the places they’d travelled, and slowly falling for him.

In Skyhold, where she feels a bit more comfortable, Elera likes to pass time in her own room, because she knows where everything is and doesn’t have to worry about tripping over unexpected objects. She often sings to herself to pass the time, or just enters the Fade to wander around in a place where she can see for a while. She can also be found in the stables a lot, for obvious reasons, practising her magic while Blackwall works at his carving. If she’s not there, then - as in Haven - she can be found in Solas’s rotunda or Sera’s tavern room. She tends not to wander much into other places unless there’s a friend with her, because she’s worried about getting lost or falling over and making a fool of herself.

9. Was your Inquisitor pleased or displeased about Morrigan joining the Inquisition?

For my Qunari quizzie, Talan Adaar.

Talan had no reason to be displeased - he doesn’t get magic stuff, so having more people around who understand it is a good thing in his books. Sure, Morrigan seemed a tag shady, but she couldn’t be worse than the apostate elf with apparently no past, the Fade spirit, the Tevinter, or the Ben-Hassrath spy. She’d helped him out and she knew her stuff; that was all he needed to accept her, even if he did keep an eye on her at first.

14. Who drank from the Well of Sorrows?

Morrigan. Talan’s not very ambitious; any power the well could offer him wasn’t really a temptation. He didn’t have a clue what to do with crazy elven magic, and he’s a careful guy - he didn’t want to do something that could kill him, leaving the Inquisition without a leader, Meraad without a brother and Cassandra without a lover. In his eyes, Morrigan was in every way the more qualified, and if she was willing to take the risk, it was her choice.

Thanks again for asking! :D

[kweebtrash]

Celebrate

YoongixReader (M)

Words: 6k+

Features: Bestfriend!AU, squirting, sex toys Summary: Yoongi celebrates his best friends birthday and gives her naughty presents that spark a night of debauchery. Mostly pwop (theres a small plot lol) A/N: Lmao this title sucks, but I was supposed to finish this for Yoongi’s birthday but my lazy ass did not. But I’ve been working on this for weeks and I’m really happy about it! I tried to mimic first-time awkwardness a bit and general bestie fun. Hope Ya’ll like it! Also still need a beta! Inspired by x

“Hey, I’m here.”

You pinned your cell phone between your ear and shoulder scoffing as you held out a dress in front of you. “What?! I’m not even ready yet!”

Yoongi’s irritated voice came from the other line. “Ready? For what? We’re not even going anywhere! You’re the one who said you didn’t want to go out because of work tomorrow.”

“I know, I know!” You replied, annoyed at the scolding he was giving you. You yanked a shirt from your closet, holding it up to your chest and examining how it looked in the full-length mirror, before tossing it aside. “I want to at least look presentable.”

“Y/N, I’ve seen you in sweatpants, bent over a toilet with vomit in your hair. I think we can get over presentable.” You heard the sound of a rustling bag and a small grunt before Yoongi continued. “I’m coming upstairs, bye!”

Rolling your eyes, you pressed the red end call button and tossed your cell phone onto the bed. There was no point in arguing with your best friend. He was just about as stubborn as you were. The true reason you wanted to look nice was because, well for one, he was coming over and two, he always looked so stylish. Yoongi’s style was fashion forward yet effortless, looking like he stepped out of an issue of GQ. He was a pretty boy in every sense of the word. Whenever you would hang out with him people would turn their heads and stare. Even high school girls would giggle obnoxiously and take pictures. You always felt like a hobo next to him so you compensated by trying to dress to the nines every time you two were together.

But Yoongi was right- you had said that you just wanted to stay home for your 21st birthday. It had fallen on a weekday this year and of course, you had to get up and go to work the next day. Besides, you and Yoongi’s 6 other friends would be dragging you out on the weekend to a club for a night of debauchery. You couldn’t do it twice in one week, though. Yoongi, however, continuously insisted that you do something on your actual birthday day and had planned something. You just hoped it wasn’t anything too extravagant. Sighing, you trudged to the front door to unlock it so Yoongi would have no problem getting in, before retreating back to your room to find something else to wear. Something that was more relaxed and casual and wasn’t your pj pants or didn’t have a one-year-old pizza sauce stain on them.

Making your way to the dresser you bent down to open the last drawer where you stashed your dozens of leggings, trying to decide between plain black or black with patterns. A very tough choice indeed.

“Well damn the full moon is out tonight!” You heard him say. He slapped the lace elastic band of your thong and laughed. You jumped up, yelping and covering your backside, shocked that he had come up so quickly.

“Dammit, Yoongi! Cut it out!”

He chuckled and sat down on the bed, leaning back on his arms. “Lace panties? Is that all for me?” He smirked.

You rolled your eyes at his crude joke. Your comfort barrier was indeed lowered when he was around you. Both of you had gotten sick and tired of people always asking you two if you were a couple. Yoongi of course, being the little shit he is, just took to saying yes, purposefully saying sexually explicit things and flirting with you just to make the nosy people uncomfortable. For years it had made you laugh, and it still did, but sometimes it made your cheeks flush and your heart flutter just a little bit too much to your liking. You still joked with him nonetheless, covering up your feelings and hoping you weren’t too obvious.

“Oh yeah, definitely for you, daddy.” You chuckled and shimmed into your selected leggings.

“Oh, I’m daddy now, huh? That’s a new one.”

He smiled from ear to ear, that same dorky smile that never failed to make you laugh. Your eyes met in the mirror attached to your dresser, holding each other’s gaze for a moment. You noticed his eyes trailing lower, resting at the flirtatious lace bra you wore. There was only a small space between your breast, the padded cups pushing them up and together. You couldn’t really blame him for looking as it made your tits look damn good. But did he really have to stare so intently, especially when he was biting his lip in concentration? God, that always killed you. “You gonna stop drooling over there, loverboy?” You asked, pulling a tank top over your torso, before giving his shoulder a hard whap to snap him out of it.

He blinked quickly, crashing back down to reality. A rather nervous giggle escaped him. “Took you long enough to pick an outfit. I was about to fall asleep!”

“Oh, you liar! You were staring at me with that fuckboy look on your face.”

He put his hand over his chest feigning being hurt. “I take offense! Maybe you won’t get your present.”

“Present?” Your ears perked up at the sound of the word and your eyes caught sight of the bag by his feet. “Yoongi, you didn’t have to!”

A smirk crossed his face. “Whatever. You say that every year but I know you’re expecting something.”

“I am not!” You snatched the bag from beside him with an excited grin on your face. “You really didn’t have to, though.”

Yoongi shrugged nonchalantly. “You always get me nice stuff for my birthday so I feel like I should go above and beyond for you.”

He was literally the sweetest person (when he wanted to be anyway). Only he would go out of his way to do something so nice for you. You were stunned at his thoughtfulness. It was the reason why you loved him so much. Love-that word lingered in your thoughts as you pulled out the messily wrapped box from the bag. You fingers shook slightly as you peeled the wrapper away, eyes turning wide when the present came into view.

“YOONGI!” you screamed, tossing the box at him.

He threw his head back, cackling while still trying to defend himself from your attacks. You jumped onto him, playfully slapping his shoulders. “You got me a damn vibrator?!”

“Yeah! Then-” he tried to catch his breath from all the laughter. “Then you can stop being so damn grumpy and violent all the time!” He grabbed your wrists and pinned them to your sides while you straddled his chest.

“I can’t fuckin’ believe you!” You struggled against his hold trying to shield him from seeing the rush of color that now decorated your cheeks and tips of your ears.

“But wait-!” He said dramatically. “There’s more!”

Rolling your eyes, you dug your knees into his rib cage trying to get him to let go. “You really are asking for it, aren’t you?” You growled.

He coughed, letting your hands go and tapping your thigh signaling his defeat. “It’s your 21st birthday! Live it up a little! Destress, fuck yourself senseless because we all know your past boyfriends-and girlfriend- haven’t.”

Well…he got you there. You hadn’t had the best string of relationships in the past couple of years. Everything happened during high school so it wasn’t like those were real relationships anyway. Just a couple of kids pretending they were adults. Awkwardly exploring each other’s body was cute for a minute but getting older meant you were missing out on something good. Lately, you hadn’t really had time to yourself since you and Yoongi had gotten the job at the production studio. Not to mention your tiny pocket rocket had been on its last leg after years of abuse. Maybe the stupid vibrator wasn’t such a bad gift after all. But you weren’t going to let him know that. Now way in hell.

“C’mon, look at the rest of the gifts. They’re good. I promise.” He said with a devilish smirk which only meant that you were in for more trouble. With a sigh, you slid off him and grabbed the bag from the floor. Digging through the excessive amount of tissue paper you found 3 cheesy pornos, a tiny packet of clitoral stimulation gel, and a pair of neon green glow-in-the-dark sex dice. You gave him what had got to be your best “what the absolute fuck” face and it just restarted another fit of laughter. Tears formed at the corner of his eyes as he wiped them away and tried to regain his composure.

“Okay, okay so the website I got this off of had this special- free shipping with surprise gifts. Surprise!”

Your face remained the same, unamused by his laughing fits. He took the dice from your hands and rolled them on the floor. “Don’t you wanna-” he looked to see what each die had landed on. “Lick foot? Oooh that’s sexy right?”

He reached his sock clad foot out to poke your tummy gently and your serious facade was broken. “You are the absolute worse, you know that?” You chuckled and waved his foot away from you. You decided to join in on the fun by picking out one of the DVDs and giving it the once over. “Want to watch one of these things and see how awkward and fake it is?”

He sat up and shrugged. “Why the hell not? We can order pizza, my treat, birthday girl.”

“Hell yeah, it better be your treat.” You kissed his cheek appreciatively, grateful for his thoughtful albeit absurd gifts. It was already turning out to be much better than going out to a bar and getting annoyed by strangers. You headed over to the decent sized flat screen opposite of your bed and selected the DVD called “Island Paradise.” You opened the port on your Playstation 4 and set the DVD in, the sight of Yoongi leaving the room momentarily caught in your peripheral vision. You hoped to god there weren’t any more sex toy surprises but knowing Yoongi there was probably a stripper waiting to pop out a cake somewhere.

You heard him rustling through the kitchen but you continued setting up the movie, grabbing your controller and hitting X. “Yoongi, this cinematic masterpiece is about to begin!” you called out.

You turned towards the doorway about ready to go find him in the kitchen but a small flame stopped you. The first few notes of happy birthday filled your eardrums as Yoongi appeared holding a simple cupcake with a candle stuck in the frosting in one hand and a bottle of your favorite liquor in the other. A huge smiled crossed your face as you rushed over to him, wrapping him in a tight hug as he finished singing.

“You big dork” You giggled, wiping your misting eyes.

He placed a kiss on your forehead. “C’mon, make a wish and blow out the candle.”

You bit your lip as you thought about what to wish for. Feeling his gaze on you, you looked up at Yoongi, holding his stare for a moment as the wish crossed your mind. I want Yoongi to be in my life forever. You blew out the candle with a smile, content with your wish.

“Alright now let’s party!” He said, handing the cupcake to you then opening the bottle of liquor.

“We haven’t even ordered the pizza yet!” You protested as you took the melting candle out of the frosting before the wax could contaminate it.

Yoongi took a swig from the bottle before plopping himself in front of the tv on the bed. “Ahh! I will now. I know your order by heart anyway.” He fished his phone from his jean pocket and held the bottle in front of him for you to take.

You grabbed it as you sat down on the floor, careful as not to drop the precious liquid. You took a long harsh sip and turned your attention to the tv, watching the overly dramatic actors think it was somehow ok to fuck on a beach. “You know-” You coughed and rubbed at the burning sensation that remained in your chest from the alcohol. “Fucking on the beach doesn’t even sound appealing. Like sand gets in your crevices, it’s hot, the sun is beaming down on you, no thanks.”

You handed the bottle back to him as he slid down to join you on the floor. “I think it’s just the thrill of public sex that gets people off, it’s not really the sun and sand.”

You nodded in agreement as you grabbed your cupcake and peeled back the wrapper. “True, true.”

Just as you were about to take a bite, Yoongi slapped your hand sending the cupcake straight into your face and smearing frosting everywhere. You were stunned, unable to process what that little shit had done.

“It’s tradition.” he said with a devilish smirk. You wiped the smeared frosting off your face collecting as much as you could in your hand and launching your attack on Yoongi. He yelped and tried to keep you at bay but you shoved him to the floor determined to get your payback.

“You bastard!” you laughed and slapped the frosting across his cheek and nose.

“Ack! Now it’s all over me!”

“Good, you deserve it!”

He shook his head and chuckled, grabbing your wrist and pulling him close to his body. “You got something on your facccceeeee~!” He teased, sticking his tongue out to try and lick the frosting off your cheek.

“Noooooo!” You cried out, trying to keep him at bay. He released your wrist but instead grabbed a hold of your sides to tickle you. Your whole body spasmed and jolted, wriggling around to try and escape his torture. “Stop! Yoongi!”

He was in control now, pinning you down to the floor and wriggling his fingers down your sides, up to your armpits and neck. You tried with all your might to keep him at bay but spent most of the time trying to deflect his tickles and protect your body. Your laughing was uncontrollable and you could barely get a word out.

“Say uncle!”

You gasped for air, turning your head towards his to say your defeat but you were unaware of just how close he was. Your lips met his sending a jolt of electricity through you. Your eyes fluttered open to see the shock on his face melt into complete comfort. His tongue swiped across your bottom lip, collecting some of the frosting to pull into his mouth.

“U-um….Yoongi…” you stammered.

His hand instantly went to the back of his neck, rubbing it nervously. “S-sorry, Y/N…” Though his voice seemed steady his expression was that of a saddened puppy. The silence quickly turned awkward. All your could hear was the thundering of your heart and the harsh nervous swallows of Yoongi. You retrieved a couple tissues from the box on the bedside table, handing some to him before cleaning your face.

“I’m sorry…” You whispered.

“You think of me like a brother, don’t you?” The question caught you off guard, especially when he looked you dead in the eye, awaiting your answer.

“No? I mean, yes? I mean, I don’t-well…like…I’d fuck you if you want?” Your voice squeaked at the last part of that sentence, flabbergasted that you would even admit such a thing.

“What?”

“WHAT?” you repeated his question louder as if that was somehow was going to erase what you had just said. Yes, you were close to Yoongi but you didn’t exactly think of him in a brotherly way either. However, there was always the thought that if you two did indeed get together that something horrible would happen and your friendship would be ruined. You had heard the horror stories about people being miserable after breaking up with their best friends and the friendship never being the same again. But deep in the recesses of your mind, you knew that if the opportunity ever presented itself you might take the plunge. Was that opportunity happening now? Were you really ready for it? Your mind raced a mile a minute, fiddling between pros and cons.

“Y/N, you’re so strange you know that?” he said with a dry laugh. “I feel like you’ve been driving me crazy since high school but I never wanted to be the guy who just became your friend to fuck you. I care about you and it’s so easy to be around you. I could be myself…But I couldn’t help but hate when you were with other people. I tried to hide it for a long time, feeling mocked whenever someone would ask if he were together and you would immediately say no. I just always assumed you never felt that way towards me.”

You shook your head quickly. “It’s there, Yoongi. I was just always afraid of being with my best friend and ruining what we have. What if something happened and we ended up hating each other? I couldn’t stand that.” You wrapped your arms around him tight stifling back tears as your mind played all the worst case scenarios of Yoongi not being in your life. His arms followed suit, keeping you in place against his body.

“I wouldn’t dream of it, Y/N. We’ve been attached for years. I think you’re stuck with me.”

“That doesn’t seem so bad, I guess…” you said with a playful roll of your eyes.

“Sound a little more enthusiastic, why don’t ya?!” he replied. “I’m not drunk enough for these feelings”

“Who the fuck are you kidding, bro?” You reached for the liquor bottle again, taking another long harsh swig. Yoongi followed suit never even showing a sign of discomfort from the high alcohol content.

“Sooo…” he began.

“Sooo?”

“Are we like a thing now?”

A thing? A thing-thing? A really real together together thing?. It was still a little strange to think about but the butterflies in your stomach were already revealing your true feelings. “Maybe we can take it one step at a time?” you offered.

Yoongi nodded. “Ok, one step like…kissing?”

“Kissing?” You chewed at your bottom lip nervously. “Kissing’s cool.”

“Yeah?” He asked, suddenly getting closer. His lips hovered above yours just long enough for you to let out a whimper of approval. He was instantly on you then, cradling your neck in his hands as he laid soft languid kisses on your lips and making your heart skip a beat. You hadn’t expected him to be that gentle yet you relished in the feeling. All the tension in your body slipped away as you relaxed against him, trailing your hands down his sides to rest at his hips. Parting your lips, you let your tongue slide out to greet his, earning a satisfied grunt from him. Your tongues danced together in a chaotic rhythm of ups and downs and swirls that labored your breathing. He cocked his head to the side, deepening the kiss further as you found yourself slowly falling onto your back. The cheap carpet beneath scratched at your skin, digging in as Yoongi settled between your thighs.

His hands had released their hold on your neck and instead took up residence in your own hands. Your fingers entwined, locked together in a hard embrace as neither of you wanted to let go. He slid both pairs of hairs to rest beside your head, keeping your body arched against his. He pulled away then allowing air to refill your lungs, though your head was still angled towards him waiting for the kiss to continue. You heard his low chuckle as he booped your nose gently.

“I like these baby steps.” he said.

You looked down at the minimal space between your bodies. The crotch of his jeans were flush against your thin leggings. “Maybe….maybe another baby step?”

Yoongie raised an eyebrow. “Like?”

“Like…I don’t know…” You winced as the words flew out of your mouth. “A hot makeout and dry humping session like some dumb teenagers in a car?”

He pushed back his hair and laughed. “That’s not even close to a baby step!”

‘I know, I know! I…if you don’t want to we don’t have too. I don’t even know what I’m saying…” You pulled your hands away to cover your face that was now a wonderful shade of crimson.

He took your hands in his once again and kissed them both. “We know each other so it only makes sense that we’re more comfortable with one another.  Maybe it won’t be so bad to skip around a bit. It’s not like we have to get to know each other.”

You couldn’t help but smile. “Yeah…you’re right.” He always had a way of making your feel better.

“Now, get on the bed.” He commanded, pulling his weight off you so you could slide out from beneath him and crawl into the bed, making sure your ass was on full display for him. The fabric of your leggings stretched against the expanse of your ass, making it more see through and showing off the outline of your thong. You settled into the mattress, satisfied with your cheeky antics, especially when you saw the predatory look in Yoongi’s eyes.

He stood up, grabbed the collar of his shirt, and yanked it over his head easily, leaving him in just his tank top and fitted jeans. He made his way onto the bed reclaiming his place between your thighs, forcing one of your legs around him to rest more comfortably against your center. The heat had risen to your cheeks again and you wanted to look away out of sheer embarrassment.

“What?” He chuckled, looking down at you.

Your voice dropped down to a whisper. “I always get nervous and giddy and laugh awkwardly when I do stuff like this. It takes a bit for me to really relax and get into it. I’m sorry if I mess it up.”

“You’re not messing it up. What’s fucking without a little fun? If it’s all serious then it gets boring.” He assured you.

Your hand cupped his cheek gently and he turned to kiss your palm, his signature grin crossing his face. “You always make me feel better.”

“I can make you feel good in more ways than one.” He replied in a sultry tone.

Your hands slipped down his back resting just underneath the hem of his tank top. “Oh really? Prove it then, Min Yoongi. I dare you.” Your challenge was playful but his expression was nothing but. A dark lustfulness filled his eyes.

“Don’t ask for something you can’t handle.” He whispered, catching your earlobe between his teeth.

Your entire body felt like it was on a fire as a lush warmth crept over you,  your mind dangling on that slight threat. You had never seen this side of Yoongi before. Normally, he was a normal sleepy goofball but this Yoongi was electric. Your nervousness ebbed away, replaced with brazen confidence. “That so, pretty boy?” You teased, grabbing a handful of his ass.

He ground his hips into yours, the denim rubbing hard against your mound, eliciting a ragged groan. “Y/N, I’m serious.”

“Do it again…please.“

You could feel his eyes burning into you even though yours were closed, your head thrown back against the pillows. His hips rolled against you again as his tongue traced the muscle in your neck before his teeth sunk in. Your nails mimicked his teeth, digging into the flesh of his lower back to gain more friction. Yoongi decorated your skin in a haphazard pattern of bruises sending shivers down your spine. Your hips came to life, shifting upwards as you came to meet his with every roll. Soft pants shared the space between you as his hands roamed the expanse of your chest, cupping your breasts. His lips never left your neck even when you turned to try and capture his lips in another kiss. He denied you if only for a moment, choosing to occupy his actions with sliding your tank top up and over your head.

A mischievous grin spread across his face. Yoongi’s thumbs grazed against your nipples through the thin lace of your bra, bringing them to pert peaks. His bottom lip was now caught between his teeth as he watched and waited for your reactions. You couldn’t help but wonder what was going on in the devious mind of his but your answer seemed to come in the form of his own question.

“Will you let me do a little bit more than grinding?”

“Depends.” You smirked.

He lowered himself again, slightly hovering above you as his mouth took up residence around your nipple, tonguing it through the fabric while a free hand trailed down your stomach drifting lower and lower until you were literally in the palm of his hand. Your back arched up into his lust filled actions, feeling a familiar ache throughout your lower half.

“Fuck…”You breathed out. Your hand snaked its way into his soft hair, pulling it slightly as you tried to keep him as close as possible. Yoongi groaned, sending vibrations through your sensitive bud while his hand worked its way into a stroking motion, the edge of his palm brushing against your clit. The tips of his fingers pressed against your entrance through the layers of fabric. Your hips were flying at a faster pace desperate to get as much contact as possible, your toes clenching around the bed sheets. His name left your lips in a loud moan. He finally spoke again, his breath tickling the wetness he had left behind on your nipple.

“Shit…if you keep saying my name like that I won’t last much longer.”

You exhaled deeply and chuckled. “Hmm, that all you got then?”

“You’re going to keep challenging me?” he asked quizzically.

You sat up enough to get your hands behind your back to unclasp your bra, tossing it to the side and letting your breasts fall free. His stunned expression made you laugh to yourself as you trailed kisses up his neck making your way to his ear. You slipped your tongue out to trace his earlobe, pulling it into your mouth for a rough nibble. In the distance, you could hear a knock on the door. “Yoongi~” You cooed.

His eyes fluttered open as he bit his lip. “What is it, baby?”

“I think the pizza’s here.” You smirked.

Yoongi tossed his head back and groaned, getting up from the bed to answer the door seeing as he was the only one still mostly clothed. You chuckled as you watched him leave in frustration, you eyes somehow trailing to the corner of your bed where the forgotten vibrator remained. Curiously, you picked it up, reading the description on the back before pulling it out. It was a slim purple glittery stick with a slanted head. A simple button at the end of the handle controlled the vibrations. You pressed it once, watching it come to life in your hands. You pressed it once more, increasing the speed over and over until it was viciously and rather loudly vibrating in your hands.

Yoongi came back then, practically shouting, “Do you know how awkward it is trying to give someone a tip with a raging boner?!”

You laughed and held out the vibrator for him to see. “Look at I! This thing’s a menace!”

He took it from your hands and clicked the button until it was back at it’s lowest setting. “That’s why you start off slow. Do you want to try it out? It is your gift after all.”

He trailed the toy up your thighs, grazing it up and around your center before trailing it down the other thigh.

“Ahh…”You whimpered. “Really?But…”

“We’d have to get rid of these first.” He said plucking at the waistband of your leggings. You bit your lip and nodded, lifting your hips so he could slide your leggings off. He pulled both your leggings and thong off, tossing them to the floor. You watched as his breath caught in his throat as your sex was finally revealed. Though you wanted to keep your legs shut so he would stop staring, you let your thighs fall apart just a bit, your wetness gleaming in the light of the bedside table lamp. Yoongi looked up at you finally putting a stop to his staring. “Close your eyes, ok? And keep them closed.”

You obeyed him, grateful to shield yourself from the knowledge of his prying eyes. You heard him moving around making you wonder for the umpteenth time what he was up too. Suddenly your thighs were pushed further apart, a cool wetness decorating your clit. You gasped as a tingling sensation overwhelmed you. Instantly, your hand went to cover your mouth to abstain from letting out any more embarrassing noises. You thought it was Yoongi’s tongue on your clit but you soon found out that it was busy licking around the tender flesh of your inner thigh. The cool head of the vibrator was the one that met with your clit, rubbing slow tantric circles around it. The dull hum of the vibrations filled your ears as the smooth surface traveled from your opening upwards, teasing your folds and around your clit at the masterful hands of Yoongi.

You body jolted, each pulsation titillating your nerves. Everything felt you heightened though you didn’t know why. Your muscles were tensing with need and you struggled to keep a hold of yourself. Just when the sensation was at its highest, it would slip away like an erotic and torturous wave. He would slide the head of the toy lower keeping it at the rim of your entrance. And though you wanted to plunge your hips down onto it, a harsh bite warned you not to. Yoongi laid his forearm across your waist keeping you pinned to the mattress as he continued to watch your legs squirm around him. Though your eyes were still closed you could feel his gaze burning into you especially when he held just the very tip of the vibe to the tip of your clit eliciting the most whorish moan you never fathomed making.

“That’s it. That’s exactly what I want to hear.” He whispered against your sweat dampened skin. The words stuck to you, imprinting you with a dominance you never expected from your best friend. Your body easily reacted to his arching in eagerness as you teetered on the edge of an orgasm. You couldn’t believe that this little toy was driving you insane, or was it really Yoongi himself; his sultry words, the deep tone to his voice, the horrid teasing that culminated into finally sliding the head of the vibrator inside yet pulling it away just as quickly when you groaned that you were going to cum. His bites turned into hot open mouth kisses against your lower lips. His tongue greedily lapped at your throbbing bud exciting every last nerve within you.

Your hands were desperately clawing at his hair, the muscles int your lower half tensing. The vibrations were angled right against your sensitive spot making your toes curl instantly.

The vibrator hushed into silence. The half-moon indentations on the palm of your hands started to fade as your fingers unfurled from the tense fist you had on his hair. Your ragged breaths slowed though your rage was building as you wondered why he hadn’t let you cum. You opened your eyes to see him licking the vibrator clean. “I’m sorry I’m so selfish, Y/N. But I wanted to be inside you when you cum.”

Your throat closed up. No words came out as you filled the room with a stunned silence. Yoongi didn’t seem to notice the effect his words had on you. He busied himself with finally peeling away his clothes, the prominent outline of his cock that was once trapped within the confines of his jeans now springing free. You stared openly, entranced by the outline of his body being revealed. He had seen you in every state of undress but his body remained mostly a mystery. Seeing him bare before you had your heart beat skipping. He slipped away from the bed and made his way to the dresser. He knew exactly where you kept your stash of condoms thanks to your countless stories about your previous sexual encounters. You realized he listened patiently and with a heavy heart, unable to fulfill his fantasy of being with you. But that was all coming to a head now.

Yoongi returned with a condom, handing it over to you. “Put it on,” he commanded, his voice drenched in lust. You looked up at him, feigning innocence as you instead kissed the head of his cock. Your kisses started as gentle and soft but escalated into sensual licks up his shaft. Each vein skirted across the plains of your tongue. You could head Yoongi’s breathing increase, his hand gripping the headboard so tightly it was shaking. His hips tried to remain still even though he wanted to grab your head and throat-fuck you raw. You looked up at him as you swallowed down most of his shaft.

His breath stilled, a moan getting caught in his throat. You pulled away then, making sure not to stimulate him too much and rolled the condom on him. He glared down at you, only waiting the few seconds for you to put on the rubber before forcing you down onto your stomach. You raised your ass instinctively allowing him easy access to plunge inside you. Your walls stung at the sudden intrusion but you didn’t protest. The little bit of pain made your thighs quiver. You lowered your head flush to the mattress, you fingers rhythmically opening and closing around the sheets. The steady slapping of his hips against your ass making you practically scream your lungs out. His hand traveled up your spine to grip the back of your neck giving him leverage to pound faster into you. Your walls clamped down around him, the constant attention to your spot overcoming your entire body. His free hand met yours, sliding it under your body as he whispered “Cum for me,” against your glistening skin. He guided your fingers towards your clit, slowing down his thrusts a bit as his cock throbbed and ached for sweet release.

Your index and middle finger rubbed furiously at your swollen nub. It was only moments before your body froze, constricting as your orgasm gushed forth, trailing down your thighs and making your entire body shake. You barely heard or felt Yoongi’s release, your mind too clouded in the fuzzy aftermath of the most amazing orgasm you’d ever had. He pulled out slowly tying the condom off and tossing it in the trashcan by the dresser. You curled up on yourself, trying to steady your breath and fighting the urge to completely pass out.

“Hey…” He pushed the hair away from your face and peered down at you. “You ok?”

You gave him a silent thumbs up, not bothering to move.

He chuckled and fixed the pillows that were tossed aside during your romp before propping you against them. You groaned, feeling the ache between your thighs. “What the fuck happened?”

“You squirted.” He said nonchalantly before he took a heavy swig from the liquor bottle. “Probably from the clit gel I used, And the vibrator. And me going to town on your spot. “

You whapped his stomach, embarrassed by his words. “Shut up! I can’t believe you!”

“Hey, I didn’t hear any complaints from you.” He stuck his tongue out like a child before heading towards the kitchen. “Now how about that pizza?”

[xoxojustbreathe]

Religion

Completely random thoughts at 3:57am.

DISCLAIMER: If you are of any faith, please if you’re going to read this have an open mind and don’t get offended because I have no intention in offending anyone. These are just my personal thoughts and beliefs. Thank you.

Religion. There are so, so many types of religions. When I googled “how many typed of religion are there”  this is what I got

“As of 2014, there are an estimated 4,200 different religions in the world, and these can be categorized into several main religions. These include Christianity, Roman Catholicism, Islam, Hinduism, Buddhism and Judaism, although Roman Catholicism is often categorized under Christianity.”

SO many. And how is one supposed to choose? The probability of people choosing their religion based on their personal beliefs is probably slim to be honest. (maybe the numbers gone up in the past few years, but it still doesn’t seem as much)

Then theres being born into religion.

When you’re born into religion, you’re being raised on what your parents beliefs are. When you’re young and all church is to you is that place you go to every Sunday and or Wednesday (or both) and you get told bible stories in Sunday school. When you’re older and more apt to actually soak things up and understand church and religion, whose to say that’s what you personally truly believe in? It’s just something you were brought up with, so it’s normal for you. It’s what your family believes in. So it’s what you should believe in, right? And when you’re brought up in a religion, they don’t give you much chance to explore other things, find what you believe in. It’s just Here. Believe in this and only this and follow these rules and you won’t go to hell.

And that just doesn’t seem right to me really.

I think that when you’re old enough, you should be able to decide for yourself. Which technically, you can I suppose.

But there still isn’t that opening.

Sometimes it’s a situation where if you were to left that faith, your family wouldn’t be happy with you. 

But it shouldn’t be that way.

Everyone is different. Each soul is unique and everyone feels and thinks differently.

I don’t know. I feel like this is just nonsense that will end up offending someone which is not what I intended at all. 

I was just watching videos of Brendon Urie on YouTube and there was a vine he made where the radio was playing some christian thing and then his next vine he was like “I may have offended some christians in my last vine, all I can say is... forgive me?” and he laughed. 

And then I went over to his Wiki page to see what his decent was because he’s absolutely beautiful and it was Hawaiian on his moms side.

ANYWAYS to my point that sparked this thought.

In the write up of his early life it said that he was raised in a mormon family but “left the faith when he was around 17″

anyway, that’s what sparked the thought for this...assortment of words. idk what to describe this as lol.

BUT yeah anyways.

I live in an area that’s known as a “bible belt” where everyone is very very religious and if you aren’t you’re seen as a bad person.

I have a friend that’s Christian and she goes to church and everything and she preaches about stuff online but then in person she's completely different. But that has nothing to do with this. idk.

My sister’s best friend grew up in a very strict christian family where they couldn’t wear certain clothes because they were “provocative” so they had to wear long skirts and whatever and they couldn’t watch certain things or listen to certain music or do this or do that and yeah

idk.

"The concept of doing good, as opposed to being good, the idea that a lot of us have been taught, many and you see it a lot, where people push to get you to do certain things. Give you a check list 'Do this, do this, DON'T Do that, and don't do that, don't do that, but DO this and this' and everything's cool. And they miss the whole heart of the issue. If the bible teaches anything, it teaches that god is much more interested on what's on the inside, then what's on the outside. And I grew up in a place where it's a Sin to go to movies, it's a Sin to have short hair, or long hair, you gotta have short hair, it's a Sin for woman to wear dresses that are too short, it's a Sin to dance, it's a Sin. All of these 'dos and don'ts. And while there may be some merit in that, and I'm sure there is, but I'm not saying any of those things are bad or good, my point is, it misses the heart. There are millions of people, and churches and institutions  who've built an entire religion out of dos and don'ts. And there empty inside because at the end of the day, following the rules and regulations has nothing to do with grace and mercy. Because, you know what, I am as foolish and frail as everyone here, we are all, simple human beings, right? We all do stupid things from time to time, We all say things we wish we wouldn't have said, we all mess up from time to time, but here's the cool part I want you guys to know: God is not some taskmaster  whose just waiting for you to mess up and that he's gonna go whaoom! He's not he wants the best for all of us, and if we get  past the idea of 'I gotta do this, and i gotta do that, and I can't do that, and I CAN'T do that!' And you walk around in fear all the time, and you try your best to keep this list of dos and don'ts and rules and regulations, and there's no joy in that! And, Our creators greatest desire for us, is to have joy, not just fun! There's a deference, not fun, but joy." -Vic Mingogna, Sunday Reflections 2008 (video below)

I just think...idk.

I think that religion is too forced in some ways. 

And it’s such a big thing that people forget what it’s actually really about.

Since theres so many types of religions and so many different stories and gods and beliefs it’s hard to fathom sometimes.

I’ve had a few really deep conversations about religion with my best friend because neither of us really have one. I don’t remember about her parents, if they had a religion or not but growing up, I didn’t. 

Before I was born my parents had my older sister and when she was growing up they were very christian, they went to church every wednesday and sunday and read the bible regularly and all that jazz and by the time I came along they didn’t really do that anymore. I forget why, but I’m glad they did stop because I like how I am.

I don’t have a religion and that’s perfectly okay.

I do believe in some god. I believe there’s someone that unconditionally loves you and believes in you.

"Embrace God's love for you and God's desire for you, because it's good, he wants the best for all of us, he wants you to be the best person you can be. And when I say God, I don't know what image comes into your mind, everybody has a different image, right? When I say that word, maybe you think of a guy in a black outfit with a little white square around the neck. When I say God, maybe you think of a church in your neighborhood with a certain steaple and a cross on top, When I say God maybe you think of a man in a white robe with a beard, right? Every body has a different concept , when I say god maybe you think of some kind of a silver haired, big bearded guy sitting on a big throne somewhere up on a cloud, So I'm not trying to get everybody to have a single review of god, that is not my desire, my desire is just to let you know, you are an extream value to god he spared no expnece and making you, and making you unique and special in your own way, and as we go through our lives we can either make choices that make us more like he wants us to be, or less like he intended for us to be, So my desire for all of you and for myself as well is not to follow a list of rules and regulations, but to invite every day, to invite god into your life." -Vic Mingogna, Sunday Reflections 2008

If you’re still reading.... 

Watch that. If you don’t want to watch the whole thing, just skim through it, but it’s so important and so life changing. Go to 25:50 in that video and it’s basically exactly what I’m trying to say about religion. <3 

In the link I posted below I basically typed up a lot of what he said in that video or some other one and here is one of those. This always hits me right in the feels honestly.

"I gave an example once at an event, but I don't think it was this one, but I love this example: How many dad's in the room? One? Fathers, anybody? Two, three, okay. Let me ask you guys a question. When your baby was small and was learning to walk, do you remember like, going across the and going, *he gets on his knees and holds one arm out* 'Come on, walk to me, come onnnn, come onnnnn little walker, look at your legs walking!' and your baby's going *and he stand up and wobbles around, like a  baby trying to walk* Right, Right? When your little boy or little girl fell did you go "AH COME ON! CAN'T YOU GET THIS RIGHT?! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?! LOOK I CAN DO IT!" Did you do that? No. What did you do? "Come on, get back up, you can do it! Come on, I believe in you" God is referred to as our heavenly father, that is a beautiful image, of god. He's not standing up in heaven going "Ah come on! Can't you get this life thing right?! It's so easy!" No, no, he is reaching out going "It's okay, it's alright, you fell down, so what? Get back up, I believe in you, you can do it." If you can hold on to that image, and I'm talking to myself this morning, If I can hold on to that image, if we can hold on to that image of God, not the 'waboom' god, but the God whose like *gets down on his knees and holds out his hand* 'Come on, Come on, oh it's okay, so what you stumbled, you lost your balance, it's alright, come on, I believe in you' If we can hold on to that image of god it will revolutionize your life and my life, it will change the way we do business in our lives, the way we relate to others. We're gonna find ourselves wanting to share that with others because it was shared with us, and we're gonna find this huge burden lifted off our shoulders, "ahh! I don't have to follow the list anymore? I don't have to go down the checklist of the dos and don'ts and the better not and the better have?" No, no. But we're all just human and we can't do everything by ourselves, the longer you live the more you'll know that's true, some of you that are thirteen or fourteen or fifteen you'll find that out and those of us that are older  we've learned that you can only do so much in your own strength, but there is an infinite amount of power available to you from your creator, just ask him. You don't have to jump through any hoops, you don't have to wear any particular clothes, you don't have to cut your hair a certain way, just ask him." - Vic Mingogna, Sunday Reflections 2008

I don’t remember if he says it in that one or not but one year he said this (He did. It’s at 27:00)

“God is madly in love with you and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

and that is so important to remember. Regardless of anything.

My religion is that video. It’s every year that he did Sunday Reflections at that convention and I got up early to go sit and listen to him. 

I really don’t know what else to say http://tamakisgirl.deviantart.com/journal/Religion-221930193

There’s a link that little 2011 fifteen year old me wrote about this same matter. 

At the end of the day, EVERYONE is allowed to believe what they want to believe.