#and he goes 'its my autism and i get to choose the special interest' or. hyperfixation or something

[senseiwu]

Just saw a video where someone mentioned reading the curious incident of the dog in the night time, and they thought afterwards they may have autism too. When they brought it up to their mum, she was like "you knew??" cause apparently she'd done that thing people seem to do where they keep an autism diagnosis secret from their kids

It made me remember when my grandma gave me that book to read when we were all at her place for Christmas. She said something like "I think you'll really like it", which confused me cause I was more into fantasy stuff than mystery novels. I mean. I did really like it. But it's one of the things that makes me wonder... did my parents do that thing too...?

[drifloonz]

General dating headcannons for Red or Steven plz🥺👉🏼👈🏼

MY FIRST ASK FINALLY ( ok there was one before this but i didn't see that I'LL GET TO YOU LATER SORRY ) hiii . i can do that 4 u. idk if u meant glitchy or Normal Red so i'll just tack them all in one big post. we love champions who are slightly deranged ( and also red. who's like. just normal. relatively. ) i can write so much for these 3 you will regret it. some of these became general headcanons but i hope this feeds you for at least a week.

because i wrote way too much. Like. Way too much. I apologize in advance theres so much

dating headcanons for red, steven, and glitchy red!

Red

♡ of course, he's mute - whether selectively or he just literally can't speak ( or almost literally never chooses to speak ). i prefer the ladder bc red speaking feels wrong. due to this, if you know sign, he can communicate that way - but he's also really good at just like.... gesturing. it may be harder to understand at first, but the more you get to know him the more you learn certain expressions or gestures. he also makes noises, grunts(?) of affirmation, hums, things like that. he really likes making those sorts of noises actually, especially if you're dating him. he's actually pretty expressive when he wants to be, so he's not that hard to understand.

♡ on a related note, he likes to hold you ( being the big spoon... he likes making you feel comfortable and protected ) and hum against you, making you sorta feel his chest vibrate a little bit.

♡ his form of affection is very much physical, he loves to hug you and to hold your hand. even if he's the champion ( or an ex-champion? it's unclear, nobody's really stated to dethrone him iirc, he just takes breaks, vacations, and does tournaments sometimes ) he won't care about giving you physical affection in public for the world to see. especially if it flusters you but you don't seriously have an issue with it, then he loves to give you just little kisses on the cheek. when your face is red ( pun semi-intended ) it makes you look cute, to him.

♡ if you have a pokemon team of your own or are in any way interested in battling he'll love to show you the ropes or help you get better at it. he won't fight you immediately if you're not that great, but he will tell you what pokemon he thinks you'd like ( probably just . showing you ones in his pokedex or googling them idk. ) . he just loves to teach and help people get better at things bc you know battling and catching mons is this dudes special interest all the way. he even probably knows and cares about IVs and EVs and natures, but doesn't teach you about those immediately since its more advanced stuff.

♡ also yea he's autistic. All of these 3 are actually. Massive win for the autism community.

♡ if we're making strangled red canon to this red's timeline the reason he's so interested in pokemon training and battling is bc he looked up to steven who Also loved that shit to death. steven at his prime was arguably even more competitive and good than red was. to be determined though since he fucked off, but he was probably an undefeated champion until the incident. This is more of a general red hc than a dating one and also more of a steven hc but it's semirelated. if not, he probably had a lifelong interest in this sort of stuff via watching the other champions in other regions on his tv, in the news, or something like that.

♡ sometimes if you explicitly agree to it ( bc he doesn't want to give you things you don't want or don't wanna be responsible for ) he'll randomly just... give you a pokemon he caught. he just gives you it and goes 'thought of you when i saw this.' in sign.

♡ his pokemon are also naturally protective of and like you too. give them pets and treats and they will be all over you. they might even be more affectionate with you than red sometimes. red doesn't take serious offense to it, he thinks its funny tbh.

♡ his idea of dates are either entirely regular things like going to a cafe or having a picnic or it's shit like hiking up mt. silver or flying on the back of his massive fucking charizard and just seeing where the wind takes you two. he's an adventurer at heart, and if you like that then you'll love him bc one month you'll be in kanto in his house and the next you'll be in fucking galar or something. never a dull moment, really.

♡ massive cuddler. as said before. big spoon, although he won't object to being the little spoon if you really wanna. will Not let go of you unless you really want him to as well. he snores a little in his sleep, but not to a disruptive degree. it's cute. alternatively, if you don't wanna cuddle him he'll probably have plushies or a pillow he holds in his sleep instead. me, my boyfriend, and his 500 poke four-foot tall pikachu plushie

♡ he's not too much of a fashion guy but he does find matching outfits cute. honestly, he'd buy you the same or a similar hat/vest as his just bc he thinks you'd look really cute in it.

♡ he's probably taller than you. not comically, but noticeably. likes to pat your head sometimes. he finds it funny if ur shorter than him like damn. How's the weather down there.

♡ gives so many kisses. doesn't give many on the lips, actually? especially in public. he Will but not as often. he really loves kisses on the cheek in particular, giving and receiving. the loverboy...

♡ overall A tier boyfriend. big teddy bear type of guy. amazing cuddles. 10/10.

Steven

♡ assuming this is far past all 3 of his stories ( post miki and mike death, post whatever the hell he did in doors open and strangled ) how the fuck did you even start dating him

♡ regardless of the way ( i like to think that you stumbled into his home out of curiosity and he just was sort of irritated but let you stay and then became attached ), i'm assuming this is past all of that, and therefore steven has become a little less fucking murderous. if you met him earlier while he was still in a very easy to anger state, he'd probably've killed you. he knows this and he's always going on horrible thought processes of 'oh god what if i hurt them too' and that sorta thing.

♡ 100% taller than you. he's like 6'5" or taller. perhaps even Inhumanely Tall due to like missingno or something. he's usually slouching all the time due to this and he has horrible scoliosis and back problems probably. but when he stands up to his full height. jesus christ. he will def tease you, usually wordlessly and with actions, by just like. leaning on you or putting his hand flat on yours to emphasize the height difference. he thinks its funny.

♡ steven, like glitchy, is actually really social despite how he looks and acts. or at least, craves being social - or socialized with. he used to be looked up to, he used to talk to people and often, and he used to be a champion. of course, he was still a man of few words back then as well, but not as few as he is now. due to this, he'll mostly give you straightforward answers or sentences, and slowly become a bit more talkative as the relationship progresses. still, he does prefer to just listen to you talk and nod along or hum in approval... your voice comforts him.

♡ you also have to be decently far in the relationship to coax him into doing this, but he may even go out with you. like. Like out into the world. he's been so scared of how everything's changed, and of course, he does go out sometimes but he tries to avoid society as hard as he can. Do not ask steven how the fuck he got into bell tower he probably just snuck in there one night after flying to johto w miki or some shit. i like to think he himself either requested all of his info be just sort of swept under the rug after he lost miki due to feeling like he didn't deserve to be a champion without her, or the kanto league intentionally tried to make everyone forget about him after his dissapearance - since it's been so long, this has been relatively successful. only red, blue, daisy, and oak would probably know him nowadays along with some older pallet town and kanto residents probably. therefore if you wanna take him out into the world maybe avoid pallet town since it's oughta be cause for a lot of concern to the townspeople, and he really doesn't want to worry them all.

♡ despite this he does worry about the remaining residents. he never got to see red or blue go on their own journeys since he became a hermit before that happened, so he's worried about their safety. if you tell him they're fine he'll be so fucking relieved. Alternatively, they're not ( snow on mt silver and or blue tears, among other pokepastas that could've happened ) but you know. don't tell them if they aren't fine, he doesn't want to know. either way, he also feels extremely awkward about the whole daisy thing as he never officially broke up with her, he just sort of left. but obviously, he's in a relationship with you now - he just can't help but worry about her as well sometimes.. mostly just hoping that she's had a better life than he has.

♡ his voice is gruff and rough and a little scratchy from not using it that much. this won't change too much but if you're into that then well. good news for you ig. please give this man tea with a lot of honey he needs it. and he also probably likes tea more than coffee anyways for various reasons.

♡ he sometimes has nightmares about The Incident ( both miki's death, which is scarred into his brain, and murdering mike. possibly also him killing two unrelated people who were probably kids in doors open and strangled as well, but much less than his nightmares about murdering mike and miki dying. he has a lot lying on his conscious ). he'll wake up silently, probably sweating and trying not to wake you up, but if you do wake him up, just talk to him - take his mind off of it or relax him. he'll appreciate it. he'll happily do the same for you.

♡ hugs you really tightly. is not aware of his own strength or grip until you ask him to do it less. he hugs you like you'll die if you escape his arms, essentially. due to this he will also hug you a lot while cuddling, especially in bed. he doesn't want you to leave his embrace, and may even be a little tentative to let go if you ask him to.

♡ type of dude to wake up early morning, grumble something about "five more minutes," sleep in and then fall asleep with you again and then the two of you wake up at like 5 pm with major bedheads. he has a nonexistent schedule. he doesn't even sleep that often, usually opting to just stay up until he physically can't keep his eyes open. he sleeps... for very long periods of time.

♡ he likes to take walks and just roam. he did this a lot more before he killed mike but after miki died, just roaming and pacing endlessly across kanto since he had nothing else to do, and now he sort of doesn't do it out of fear of someone recognizing him.. but if you say you're gunna go on a walk he'll happily ask to join, just... expect him to not follow if you go into an area that's too public. it overwhelms him + fear of being recognized or perceived in general by people that aren't you.

♡ he has PTSD, depression, BPD, and probably more. be patient with him. he can sometimes moodswing or close himself off from you because he's scared he'll hurt you and may even intentionally push you away as a sort of mental self harm method. just give him time and be patient. he never wants to hurt you when he's like that, he's just scared.

♡ it's funny how we've gotten this far without mentioning miki that much. anyways! miki. steven still has her, still is very overprotective of her, and that does not change with you. of course he's mostly sure that miki can hold her own so he's more scared of how she might react to you, but she's perfectly fine about it. steven will often allow her to just wander on her own accord around the house, so you might have some Unintentional Miki Jumpscares, especially since she likes to follow you sometimes. going to the bathroom and then exiting? face first into colliding with miki's stomach. she's like a cat. she really likes you and is also very curious about you. steven will often allow you to take her with you if you go outside as a defensive method, even though you probably have your own pokemon. even if you don't want her to come with you she'll usually follow you outside like a dog who wants to go on a walk - or a fly - really badly. she'll also offer you random things she finds lying around like rocks or sticks. steven will often not be far behind either if you and miki are outside, since he's both very worried about you and miki to a pretty equal degree. he finds her attitude towards you very cute though, and is happy that she takes to you quite well.

♡ if you're affectionate with miki, steven will find it very cute. especially considering her whole... condition. which steven was worried about you seeing. but if you're fine with it then those worries calm down a lot. steven loves to talk about her as well - it's one of the few things you can ask him that actually will prompt him to say much more than a few sentences at a time. he will ramble about how wonderful and powerful she is and how him and her were undefeated champions of kanto... at least until the incident. miki and you are sort of the last things he has that can make him smile genuinely anymore and he loves both very much.

♡ he may talk to you, probably in one of his sort of unstable spiralling states, about the Incidents(tm) and how you should stay away from him and that he's a monster. he'll genuinely sort of break if you still show him affection after how much he tries to push you away in his unstable states. it does reassure him, but he's so confused as to why you're still even with him sometimes. all he can think of is... why would someone want a murderer like him?

♡ a lot of his skills wore down since he self-isolated for years and years. he does cook well though. just buy him groceries so not every dinner and lunch between you two is a microwave or oven meal and he'll cook for you. he's especially good at making dinners. type of dude to wear an apron with kiss the cook on it. his eating behaviors are very unhealthy ( he doesn't eat that much ) so doing this also sort of helps him get back into that. if you also have bad eating behaviors he'll try to help you out as well.

♡ fucking loves pokemon battling and being competitive, which has obviously taken a backseat since The Incident(s), but he'll be happy to help you with anything pokemon related, similarly to red. he's such a massive tryhard, or at least was, when he was still on his journey that he knows almost anything and everything about how to make your pokemon the strongest they can be - he was allegedly an undefeated champion after all. he'd happily battle with you, if uh, miki didn't have the high possibility of accidentally killing your own pokemon. and he released all of his Normal Pokemon. so. but he'll help you catch pokemon and will be happy with treating your pokemon like his own as well. he just hopes they'll all get along with miki...

♡ similarly, if you have any plans to do the gym challenge in kanto, he'll raise an eyebrow in intrigue and help you but will give you a warning of "It's been a couple years, so things might not be the same, but from what I remember..." and will straight up tell you all of their teams and everything he remembers abt each gym battle. those days were very memorable and happy for him so he remembers each triumphant victory him and miki had against each gym leader and elite four member happily.

♡ if you become the champion - of either kanto or a different region entirely, or were already - it would make things a little complicated, considering most people treating champions like celebrities and steven did Not want anybody to know you were dating him nor wanted the publicity, as it'd cause complications probably. but he'd be happy for you. it'd be very ironic though... a champion dating an ex champion... he is attracted to people who were strong though, and you were no doubt strong if you became a champion.

♡ reaaallly loves hugging you. especially backhugs. he likes surprising you with a backhug, since he's honestly pretty good at sneaking around. thinks you getting scared is a little funny, admittedly, but he'll stop if asked. like red, he also loves being the big spoon and humming so you can sort of feel a vibration from his chest. very comforting and good to go to sleep to.

♡ he sort of just... follows you around wherever you go, really. doesn't have much else to do.

♡ a fact that many people forget is that steven is canonically a gamer for better or for worse. he has so many stocked-up consoles and games and i like to think he collects them too. due to this he will happily play games with you or watch you play them happily. he will try to impress you w how well he plays certain games bc he's a bit of a nerd. he also knows glitches in a lot of games he owns #lol

♡ i like to think that pokemon cards exist in universe and he probably also just collects those. he has every charizard card to date. don't ask him how he got those, he'll just give you a Look and refuse to answer ( either paid way too much or stole them or something ).

♡ continuing the whole collecting thing he has all of his trophies and badges and adjacent stuff lined up somewhere near his bed. will happily brag to you about how he got each one in hopes to impress you, and also to reminisce on the better times. He also probably has a charizard plushie or two.

♡ if you wanna style his hair he'll allow you. feel absolutely free. he really doesn't do much with it other than lazily wash it nowadays anyways, so he doesn't mind. he likes the sensation of your hands in his hair as well... it's comforting. just try not to tug or yank his hair.

♡ he's a little overprotective and he will often try to keep you in his home. he's worried about losing you if you go outside, and he isn't too willing to follow considering his urban legend reputation within kanto. things like asking you to stay just a few more days, but he'll always say that when you mention needing to leave. if you're persistent enough, he'll let you go, but he's just worried... and very clingy. be sure to at least send him messages ( if he even has a phone ), if you intend to be gone for longer than a day.

♡ if you have a pokemon team, which, you probably do, he'll be happy to learn about and get along with each and any of them. as long as they get along with miki or are at least willing to, he's fine with them.

♡ overall very depressed man but he's also a big teddybear and loves you sooo much he just isn't good at expressing it. 10/10 ( <- clearly biased )

Glitchy Red

♡ glitchy, on the other hand from red, is Very fucking talkative. red and glitchy are like... the opposite of eachother which i find very funny. not entirely, of course they share similarities due to being generally the same person, but being trapped in a game so long made him desperate for any sort of touch, any sort of contact, any sort of socialization of ANY kind. which is why he's talkative - he may stumble over his own words or trip up on them since he's only used to speaking through textboxes, which embarrasses him. don't comment on it or he'll probably just not talk for the rest of the day.

♡ sometimes if you touch him you'll get that static shock . he'll apologize a lot if he ever does this because it's usually unintentional and just a thing that can Happen due to his whole... state. happens more often when he's upset, happens less when he isn't.

♡ his glitches seem to stutter to a sort of rhythm sometimes. if you're observant enough, these usually give away his current emotional state. he gets glitchier the more upset he is, obviously, and he gets more stable the more happy he is. so around you... he's usually pretty stable.

♡ really likes holding your hand. it assures to him that yes, you are real... and you are with him. any form of contact makes him happy, but holding his hand is just simple and nice and it grounds him.

♡ if this isn't in the pokemon universe, then i'd like to think you can play pokemon games around him and he'll just commentate on it and won't be too bitter as long as modern red doesn't show up. he probably unironically likes a lot of the pokemon he's never seen, but will just go like. "tch. whatever. pikachu's better." under his breath, since he never wants to admit he likes anything pokemon related past certain gens. he's that type of dude who'd get so unnaturally angry about dexit.

♡ he's also very judgemental about the way you play games, especially pokemon lol. he's a fucking backseat gamer oh my god. he's honestly not that actually genuine abt his comments hes just very used to bitching abt the way ppl play games due to Being in one for so long. he did it to annoy people and make them stop playing and it worked. if you get a little angry at him about this he'll notice and mumble an apology.

♡ like steven, he'll just follow you around and hang around you for most of the day. he legitimately doesn't have anything else to do, so.

♡ he doesn't need to sleep or eat, but he can still feel the sensations of taste and touch and he fucking loves finally having self-agency and the ability to feel these things. everything in his own world became extremely dull, even the pain after a point. plus he never ate food in there, so yk. due to this will eat a lot of food and will touch anything he can, intaking their textures.

♡ has autism, probably ptsd, misophonia ( especially with fucked up game noises they'll make him go into a state of pretty raw anger ), bpd, and prob more.

♡ loooves cats and cat pokemon and anything adjacent and im definitely not taking this headcanon from like several artists. really likes litten and skitty, particularly.

♡ if you let him, he loves to just touch you all over. just like. rub your cheeks. pat your head. run his hands through your hair. he's so unused to feeling any of this that he can get absolutely lost in feeling how ... real you are.

♡ he's the type of guy to chug cans of monster and then wonder why his bodys reacting poorly, glitching all over the fucking place as he has a sugarrush like response to it. he didn't even know that could Happen as a bodily response so he's just so panicky when he intakes too much sugar or caffeine until you explain that to him LMAO

♡ he'll take up like several hobbies and then drop most of them out of impatience and disinterest, but he'll try almost anything once. he does like idly cooking or cleaning since they're useful to the both of you.

♡ loves to go outside and explore. it's the red in him. if you allow him to he loves to just take your hand and walk around wherever you live. if you get tired, he'll carry you, since he doesn't really get tired - if he does, not as quickly as you do for certain. people may give him odd looks, but he could care less.

♡ his kisses feel like electricity but in the best way

♡ on a related note, kiss him all over. he'll get so flustered and he'll stutter out cute little embarrassed noises and then he'll just pull his cap over his face to hide his expression a little.

♡ ... admittedly, he's like the only guy on this list who prefers to be the little spoon, but he'll default to the big spoon just because he likes to make you happy. but the second you have your arms around his body he'll never want you to let go. he's insanely touchstarved. he's like a cat that constantly is rubbing against your leg for attention after this. please hug him throughout all times of day.

♡ despite being so talkative theres some days where he just doesn't feel like saying too much. mostly because he's tired, in any sense of the word, or overthinking or something. just be patient and loving with him.

♡ it's actually pretty easy to make him flustered or to make him smile. give him any form of compliment, praise, or touch, and his face will be red ( pun intended, again ) and he'll be smiling so large. it's really cute.

♡ his hair is sharp to the touch if he's unstable and stressed, but if he isn't it's very fluffy. run your hands through his hair and take his cap off and he'll fall asleep so quickly.

♡ speaking of, like red, since theyre... yk the same person for the most part, he also snores. it just has a sort of glitchy tone to it like his voice does. it is comforting though, and he snores a lot louder than regular red.

♡ wouldn't it be funny if he could enter your dreams while you sleep too like at the end of the og pokepasta. if you have a nightmare he just notices somehow and beats the nightmare to death and just cuddles you and helps you feel better. either that or he just gets so lonely that he just visits you in your dreams sometimes to talk to your consciousness. he probably has a lot of sleepless nights where he'll just enter your dreams to have something to do.

♡ overall, very easily embarrassed and flustered touchstarved boyfriend. he's a little moody but he's very cute. 10/10. i am never ranking one of these mfs under 10/10 because im biased.

[veinsandknuckles]

please write something w abed being comforted by his partner!! i don’t mind if it’s sfw or not!! just please make it soft and stuff! thanks!!

Very good prompt, thank you anon!!! Abed Nadir/Reader Abed shuts down, goes nonverbal and the reader helps him recover. PG-13 Content warnings: ableism, self harming stims, Autism Speaks (implied), reader and Abed are both hornballs (implied) I think I wrote a gender neutral reader, but if I didn’t succeed lmk what I should fix. Same goes for any content warnings I may have missed! -------- You turned heel and ran as soon as you heard Abed scream. There was nothing quite as painful, both sonically and emotionally, as that high pitched, drawn out shriek and you knew it never came until he’d been pushed well beyond his limits. It carried, too, before it trailed off - there was a good distance between your upcoming lecture and the library so by the time you threw open the door to the study room, you were out of breath.

Abed sat on the floor, hugging his knees to his chest and Britta crouched beside him, awkwardly patting his shoulder and waving a hand in front of his face.

When she saw you, she got to her feet to give you room. “I don’t know what happened, I found him like this.”

“Thank you, Britta.” You got to your knees in front of him and Abed stared right through you. It would be alright - you had a plan. “Abed, can you talk?”

Abed blinked. You drew a deep breath and looked him over. His grip was a little tighter, his posture was a little more hunched. You studied his hands - his nails were digging into his arms, he was hurting himself. As counterintuitive as it sounded and as heartbreaking as it was to see, you knew this was a good sign.

You kept your tone and face as neutral as possible so he wouldn’t have anything to interpret. “Can you make a sound?”

He screwed his eyes shut and after a pause, he managed a little hum.

“Alright, good. Last question, are we doing scenario A?”

This time the hum came quicker and stronger. Once meant yes, twice meant no. Silence meant he was beyond choosing. You turned to Britta.

“Britta, do you have Abed’s class schedule?”

“I think so.” She got out her backpack and started rifling. You could tell she was nervous, and like most nervous people, this meant she wanted to talk. “I should have a copy in my wallet, or I can get one from -“

“Can you find his professors and tell them what’s up?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I can do that.”

“Great, thank you. I’ll keep you updated.” You turned back to Abed. “Abed, I’m going to grab you.”

With a bit of effort, you managed to get him on his feet with his arm across your shoulders. He stood on his own but held on tight. “Good. Now we’re going to walk, just follow my lead.”

The sight of the two of you staggering awkwardly down the halls was enough to make practically everyone stop and stare. You knew from experience that glaring right back sometimes prompted people to get out of the way but usually didn’t remind them to mind their own business. Abed had told you he didn’t notice, especially not when he was this far gone, and that if he noticed, he didn’t care. That didn’t stop you hurting on his behalf.

It took some doing, but in less than five minutes you made it to the right door. Abed walked on his own now so he entered ahead of you and stood motionless in the middle of the room while you turned on the lights, shut and locked the door behind you and made sure everything was as you’d left it. Popularity with the dean might be a mixed bag, but it definitely had its perks and the use of this dilapidated, dank corner of the campus as an emergency hide-out was one of them.

You made sure to walk into Abed’s eye line before touching him again, then took him by the arm and led him to an armchair placed against the far wall. He sat and you sat beside him.

From under your own chair, you got out a box of emergency supplies and dug out a candy bar, thanking the stars that no rats or stoners had found this little stash yet. You peeled off the wrapper and handed it to Abed who held it in both hands and took a bite. Slowly, gradually, his breathing deepened and his limbs relaxed.

“What time is it?” His voice was steady but quiet.

“It’s twenty minutes past three.”

“I have a test.”

“That’s alright, you can take it over another day. Britta is filling everyone in”

Abed sighed. He’d finished the candy and wiped his mouth on his sleeve.

“You want another one?”

He held his hands out, but wide apart, and you placed the whole box in his lap so he could help himself.

It always baffled you when people insisted Abed was difficult to read - all you’d had to do to learn was watch, listen, use a very little imagination and then ask him to explain whatever wasn’t logically obvious. He fished out a Rubik’s cube and went to work of separating the colours as thoroughly as he could.

“Thank you,” he said and looked at you properly for the first time.

For now, as long as nothing caught him off guard and he was careful, the danger had passed. You smiled and squeezed his knee. “Always.”

“Aren’t you missing your classes?”

“Eh. I like to be a little unpredictable - keeps them on their toes.”

He smiled back. “People love a good mystery. Simple mysteries, anyway.”

“Who are you calling simple?”

Abed looked a little questioning, so you waggled your eyebrows to signal that you were kidding. His expression didn’t change. “You’re not simple. You figured me out and not even I got very far with that.”

“I don’t know about all that... it’s usually easier to understand other people’s problems than to understand your own.”

“I guess that’s true.” He seemed to be working through something, so you let him be until he spoke again. When he did, he sounded hesitant. “Will you get bored?”

“How do you mean?”

“Once you’ve figured me out.”

“Abed, you’re not a puzzle.”

“I don’t know. A lot of awareness campaigns would disagree with you.”

“No, I meant you’re not a puzzle because that implies a challenge.”

Now he stared at you and his slightly offended expression made you laugh. It might suck to always be called special, but it did still mean you were special.

“Being with you is not hard work. At least it isn’t hard work for me.” But Abed didn’t look reassured, so you went on. “Does it feel like I’m trying to solve you?”

“I’m not sure. You’re methodical. Maybe I just worry about it, so I look for signs...”

You reached out and put an arm around him. Abed leant his head on your shoulder.

“I don’t want to make you feel like that because it’s not true. I love all of you. If I just wanted to learn how to help someone through a shutdown, there’s easier ways to do that than dating you.”

“Cool.” He held up his hand and you laced your fingers between his.

“Should I do anything differently?”

“No... I just needed to be sure.”

“What happened to stress you out, anyway?”

“I don’t want to talk about it. It wasn’t interesting.”

You snorted. “Alright then.”

He leaned out, a small smile playing on his lips. “So, if you're not dating me for my mind, it must be because I’m physically irresistible.”

“Of course it is.”

“Cool.”

“Every time you talk about Inspector Spacetime I tune out your voice and imagine climbing you like a palm tree.”

“What?”

“I meant -“ you began, but then Abed waggled his eyebrows and you laughed. “Oh, I see. Very nice.”

“My mind was somewhere else.”

“Yeah, I bet.”

He pulled at you, gently, and you slipped out of your seat to sit on his lap. Abed put his arms around you and kissed you and the kiss still tasted of sugar. When he broke it, you felt short of breath for the second time that day.

You leaned your forehead against his to steady yourself and forced yourself to ask, “are you ready to get back out there?”

“Technically, yes. If I lie, will you stay here with me?”

“Of course.”

“Then I’m not ready.”

“Good. I was hoping you’d say that.”

[rasp-passion-two]

Hello, sorry if this is annoying but can you explain how Himiko is neurodivirgent, I don't mean to come off as rude or anything, I just don't know much about the topic and am curious? Sorry to cause any trouble.

It’s absolutely not any trouble!! I love talking about how Himiko shows signs of being neurodivergent. It hits close to home specifically since not only is she one of my favorite characters, but I relate to her a lot. Okay, this might be a bit long, so sorry about that lol:

So in case you don’t know exactly what it is, neurodiversity is when mentally your brain is wired differently than normal, or “neurotypical”, peoples brains. Especially with considerably easy functions like socialising, thinking, learning, developing or ageing, and many others. Many disorders can fall under the neurodiversity spectrum. ADHD, BPD, autism spectrum disorder, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, dyslexia, and many others.

Personally, I think Himiko would fall into the category of being autistic, which has a lot going into it, but can be summed up as a developmental disorder that involves delays in communication, thinking, social situations, and basic human understanding.

Though there is a thread on Twitter that does a good job covering certain criterias that I won’t end up covering (her lack of understanding of social cues, development delays, the reason why she’s depressed, etc.) and it’s really good!!

Below, I’ll list the traits that, in my opinion, Himiko possesses that are common in ND people. Not all of them will be listed, just the bigger ones:

Talking in a slow, almost “emotionless” way

Himiko talks a certain way throughout the whole of the game, rarely ever changing even when she’s expressing very strong emotions. From the very first line she speaks, Himiko talks about something exciting to her, but still sounds very flat and unenthused. Most ND people will always speak in the same tone of voice no matter what. Sometimes, it's very flat and monotone, like Himikos. Sometimes they'll speak slowly either to gather together what they want to say next, or that's just how they were wired to speak. (Almost exactly like Jataro from DR:AE who speaks in a similar way. Who also has a few neurodivergent traits. But that's just a theory c:)

Childish behavior

This usually ranges, but Himiko has a few traits that neurodivergent people have that others consider “too childish”. She’s extremely naive in how she perceives the world, people around her, and their intentions with interacting with her. Like when Kaito asked her to bring her a crossbow of all things and it takes little for her to be convinced to assist him. Or when Kokichi makes fun of her, and she doesn't always gets it. She's sometimes able to understand, but mostly she doesn't understand that he's just taking advantage of her innocence to treat her how he does with others. She takes things everyone says at face value and believes them easily. Her peers consider her to be a bit slow in many areas, almost in a childlike way. She almost has a child-level understanding of vocabulary (i.e. pronounces words the way children do like how the way she says magic almost sounds like “myagic”, her vocabulary is pretty limited, and she usually starts using certain words that she hears others use). When having her Master brought up with the possibility that he left her selfishly and that she was better than him, she always denies it, keeping an innocent mentality so she won’t feel too bad. After being motivated to move forward, she’s seen a lot to want to be helpful to the group and do something useful, and in return they, in my opinion, view that behavior how older people view a child wanting to be helpful to them. The thread above goes more into detail (her bathroom issues, having a unique way of remembering and referring to objects), but these are only some of the examples for Himiko's maturity.

Being a “gifted child” when she was young

This is entirely my speculation since this is never addressed in canon, but Himiko strikes me as a former “gifted child” which most NDs go through. Her “gift” was discovered at a young age and she was really skilled at it. She was known for it by huge masses of people and praised for it. She even had to save the person who saw the talent in her and taught her everything she knows about it when he made a mistake. She gets invited to all types of events because of it. Lot’s of ND kids who were thought of as “gifted'' may have gone through the same thing. It would also explain why she’s so depressed and unmotivated through most of the game, as a result of what’s called “gifted child syndrome”. Having so much praise and expectations set on her so young. Getting older and not having the same energy for it as you had before. Technically all the DR kids are former gifted children, since they're the product of a company exploiting their "gifts", which is a factor in how the world ended in the way it was. But Himiko has more, you could say "traditional" symptoms and after-effects of growing up as a gifted child (depressed, lack of motivation, lack of motivation in her subject, etc.).

Being viewed as lazy

Even though she takes what she's passionate about seriously, less than when she was younger or not, Himiko doesn't always take action with magic, and even everyday tasks. ND people usually lack any sort of drive, sometimes having an “I’ll come back to it later” mentality, excited about it or not. Himiko lacks any drive and motivation throughout the game, even at the idea of being killed, or put in the line of suspicion for someone's killer. She’ll always make excuses on why she can’t act on things, the most common being “she doesn’t have enough MP”. Which goes back to her talent as a magician, which she is especially sluggish in.

Bottling in her emotions and not wanting them to show. But when she does, it results in an on-going meltdown

We all saw it in its prime during the end of the third trial after all, right? Himiko was sort of always closed in, but it wasn't extreme since she hadn't hit her lowest yet. When she did though, (being the prime suspect of Ryoma dying, her closest friends Tenko and Angie dying, being one of the suspects of one of their murders, etc.) She still attempted to hold it all in, which ND people do for a variety of reasons (not knowing how to process extreme emotions, not wanting too much attention by expressing them, or choosing unhealthy ways to process your feelings, amongst others). But once Kokichi called her out for the second time? Not only was everything practically gushing out of her face, but she literally passed out from crying for so long. I don't know whether to laugh or cry at that myself, ha. 

The same thing happened in the last trial kind of. Once the truth of the killing game and their identities is revealed, she seems to have a meltdown. It could be from the overwhelmingness of the situation. It could be the amount of "change" of the situation, which she doesn't even remember. It could also be overstimulating tones with the change in environment, the info dumping, and how everyone jumped from topic to topic etc. Meltdowns are normal for ND people, especially since they usually hold in their feelings. Himiko got better at expressing herself, but meltdowns will still happen once something overwhelming occurs (it's a great way to let out steam!!)

Stimming

Stimming is when someone, ND or not, self-stimulates themselves by repeatedly moving in some way either by speaking, moving either themselves or something else, or watching someone else do it. Most of the time, you can see Himiko fidgeting with her fingers or with her hat. Doing something with her hands, which is a form of stimming

Despite that, Himiko most noticeably stims by speaking, as she sometimes repeats stuff others say, sometimes repeats a word in order to comfort herself and her beliefs (saying “it’s magic” over and over, either in retaliation or in general), and has a go-to word that she’ll always use almost every sentence when she doesn’t know what to say, is caught off guard/by surprise, or just when she starts and ends her sentences (y’know like, “nyeh”?).

“Odd” facial features/expressions

This one presents itself a lot in the game and through her design as well. Her lip stays tucked out all the time, her eyes don’t always stay open, and her face often keeps the same expression (tired and kind of bored). Just like when she speaks, even when she's expressing intense emotions, she'll keep a mellow expression. She lifts her hat into the air and not much changes expression-wise. She'll be accusatory to someone and not much changes expression-wise. To certain people she interacts with, they think her face is "weird" since it'll pull in ways it usually doesn't for NT people. It could be because she's trying to force the look on herself so it's more easier for people to read (which is shown to be the case for most people), but it's also possible that it's just how she looks. Since she's older, she has more freedom to make more strategies to have more natural expressions, but it's still off-putting to some of her peers.

The infamous saying, “she comes off as annoying”

Many people know this one well, and Himiko is no different, especially in the earlier chapters. Almost everything stated above is a factor that plays in people's disdain for Himiko, in the game and the fandom. Characters like Shuichi, Kaede, Tenko, and even Angie are one of the only few people who try to understand and adjust to Himiko's behavior in their own method, while everyone else either ignores her, doesn’t take her seriously, or even end up bullying her because of it, not willing to adjust themselves for her specific brand of behavior. Being an obvious target, coming off as weird, being too blunt and coming off as rude (which even caused her having strained relationships with K1-B0, Miu, etc.), sometimes hyperfixating too hard on magic (her “special interest”), all seem to be a reason for people thinking she’s too high maintenance.

,,,this ask sure is a month old isn’t it? retrdfyugihhuyt I am EXTREMELY sorry I answered this so late, but I haven’t been online lately because of moving, but at least I managed to finish this in less than a day lol. It’s long, but I love Himiko, and love all the quirks that make her who she is, and am happy to explain it to others!! I hope this answered your questions either way (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

[hollenius]

re neurodivergent headcanons in Breaking Bad/Better Call Saul, I think the first time (a year or so ago) I read something where someone online suggested Chuck was somewhere on the autism spectrum (high functioning/Aspergers), I laughed it off as a ridiculous suggestion, because he didn’t “fit” many of the stereotypical traits seen in other fictional characters or in the popular conception of the topic…but in retrospect, I think that came more from my misunderstanding of the “spectrum” part of it than anything else. It’s definitely a plausible/possible diagnosis comorbid with the anxiety disorder(s) he canonically has.

·         We know Chuck’s a good actor (e.g. his ability to fool Jimmy in “Klick”) and is able to mimic and slip into different sorts of social behaviors (e.g. his ability to social climb from a working class or lower-middle-class family to the world of white shoe law firms), so he’s probably capable of using masking in most public settings. This is apparently a more common trait in autistic women, but men do it as well, if less frequently.

·         Studies asking about the long-term effects of masking seem to imply it takes a physical/emotional/mental toll on the person using it, which might explain why, by the time we see him in BCS, the stress of acting “normal” in meetings and the like, when compounded with the worsening of his anxiety problems, leaves him curled up under a space blanket for hours or even days afterward. Trying to compensate for multiple issues at once is probably even more taxing.

·         He seems prone to getting overwhelmed by things and either shutting down or lashing out in reaction. The most extreme form of the former is when he goes catatonic for hours/days in response to being tazed or put in the CAT scan machine; the most extreme form of the latter is probably him completely losing it and shouting/crying/having to be physically restrained by the hospital staff because he’s so upset about being surrounded by lights/hooked up to an EKG/being recommended for a CAT scan.

·         Contrary to stereotypes, Chuck is decent at reading people (or at least he’s extremely good at reading his brother and knowing how he behaves) and he interacts well with people within a work context, but he doesn’t seem to have any friends outside of it, or much in the way of a social life–the other lawyers hold him in awe as a sort of glorified animate law encyclopedia, rather than someone they would want to hang out with or chat with informally. (Though Chuck doesn’t come across as the sort who would be interested in chit chat with coworkers anyway...) Being totally housebound and cut off from the outside world is upsetting to Chuck primarily because it interferes with his work as a lawyer–we never get the sense that he’s upset about it having any effect on his interpersonal relationships, because he doesn’t seem to have any. This is probably why losing Rebecca hit him so hard. He’s got almost nobody else, besides Jimmy and Howard, and he’s really not emotionally open and unguarded with anyone.

·         He’s got problems dealing with his emotions in general. Even when he’s trying to do his little pain/emotion/medication journal as part of his psychiatric treatment towards the end of season 3, he seems to struggle with articulating his emotional state–he’s just got “average” written down for most of the incidents he’s logged, but he’s not able to write down what his emotion is after he’s unable to sleep after insulting/lying to Jimmy to drive him away for the final time, and he seems to abandon writing in the journal after that & rapidly deteriorates psychologically. From what we see of him in the show, he seems to alternate between being extremely repressed and completely exploding and freaking out.

·         Some people have no interest in having or wanting friends, but I don’t think Chuck’s one of them. He seems pretty lonely. He remarks to Jimmy at one point in season 1 that he doesn’t really mind him hanging around to work on the Sandpiper case in his house because he’s glad for the company, which makes his systematic driving away of Jimmy and the few other people in his life all the sadder. The whole root of Chuck’s jealousy of Jimmy in the first place is that people like Jimmy, and they don’t like him. He makes attempts at being friendly, but struggles to do it on anything deeper than a surface level. (Of course, a lot of Jimmy’s friendliness and charm tends to be pretty shallow too, but I don’t know that Chuck really appreciates that or can tell the difference–all he sees are the results.)

·         He’s tone-deaf with jokes–he famously botches the attempt at a lawyer joke to his wife in the opening flashback in “Rebecca”, but he also makes an awkward attempt at humor when talking to Kim in a present-day scene later in that same episode (“the early bird gets the worm, which is good if you like worms”), which leads to some uncomfortable forced laughter from her. Some people are just serious by nature, but they probably wouldn’t bother trying to make jokes in the first place if that were the case. The fact that Chuck keeps trying to make jokes and failing suggests that there might be some impairment in that area. He sees Jimmy do it, and he sees it work for him, but can’t really manage it himself. (He seems to do ok with deadpan sarcasm though–that comment about young people loving local print journalism is probably my favorite Chuck quote.)

·         He’s very verbal and articulate, but his speech patterns can be a bit odd. He can be indirect and overly formal, which may or may not be an overcompensation for the more stereotypical autistic behavior of being too direct in speech as to be insensitive. He usually winds up still coming off as elitist and assholish anyway, though he may not be intending this/aware of this. When he’s nervous or upset, he tends to devolve into talking at people rather than to them, such as when he starts rambling on about probable cause and assorted legal precedents to the police officers who show up at his house in “Alpine Shepherd Boy”, without noticing that they aren’t even standing at the door anymore. He’s got a lot of information rattling around in his head, which he throws out as a defense, but not always in a way that is helpful; I don’t think talking about Latin translations of the Hippocratic Oath to the doctors sedating him without his consent before sending him in for a CAT scan is doing him any good (NB: the actual Hippocratic Oath is in Greek anyway, and the phrase Primum non nocere dates from a later period, so either Chuck has no idea what he’s talking about, he’s conflating two related things, or he’s freaking out enough that he doesn’t really care at this point).

·         He seems to ignore other people when they’re talking to him altogether if something sets him off or distracts him–when Howard tells him about Kim quitting HHM and teaming up with Jimmy, Chuck immediately tunes him out, to the point where Howard has to ask him if he’s still listening. Chuck says he is, but then walks off in the middle of Howard talking because he’s still distracted by what he said before, sending a confused/concerned Howard following after him. This is at its most extreme when he goes into his rant in “Chicanery” and is totally oblivious to both Galley pleading with him to stop and everybody else in the room staring at him in growing horror/disbelief until he’s far past the point of no return.

·         I’m actually sort of curious about Chuck’s abilities in court prior to the visible deterioration of his mental health, because although he clearly knows a lot about the law, his personality is a bit off-putting. I don’t know if he just sort of brute-forced his way through things because of his knowledge of obscure case law, because based on what I know from the lawyers I’m friends with, there are all sorts of subjective factors that can come into play in a court setting. The sort of things that would drive someone like Chuck nuts, like jurors who deliberately choose to ignore evidence because they’ve decided in advance that they don’t want to convict someone of a crime. (To be fair, this would also drive me completely insane, because I have a really hard time at my own job dealing with people who think the rules shouldn’t apply to them for various reasons.)

·         Chuck has an EXTREMELY black and white view of the world, and a sort of obsession with the authority of law and the importance of following the rules. He’s got really strong perfectionist tendencies within himself. I think a lot of why he gravitates toward the law is that he seems to find all the rules and procedures comforting, in a way--there’s a uniformity to the way the legal world works, and a framework in which everything proceeds--constraints which are equally binding on all participants.

·         Maybe he just knows a ton about the law because he’s a lawyer, but it might also fall into the case of it being a special interest, since his knowledge of obscure case law seems to be regarded as extensive and superlative even by other lawyers. (He reads FEC and ISO reports for fun!)

·         There’s something slightly elliptical about his thinking, and he doesn’t seem to realize that other people aren’t following his thought patterns. (He repeats his “One after Magna Carta!” justification for knowing the Mesa Verde address to Kim and Jimmy  in season 2 as well as to the officials from the Bar in season 3, which seems to suggest that he thinks it is a very obvious and logical connection that other people should grasp, though I’m not sure that it actually is outside of his head.)

·         I’m not entirely sure where the line between nervous tics and stimming is drawn, but he’s got a lot of little fidgety behaviors that come out especially when he’s stressed, especially scratching or shaking or wringing his hands. (The script to “Chicanery” indicates that he’s nearly drawing blood from digging into his hands while on his big rant, but it’s not visible onscreen because we’ve got that wonderful/agonizing slow zoom onto his face instead.) It's not clear if it predates the EHS or not. Sometimes there’s a clear tie in his behavior to perceived pain from electricity, but sometimes there’s not--sometimes it seems to result from him trying to distract himself from the electricity instead, like when he’s trying to stand outside the house for two minutes in “Bingo”. Sometimes he does it while he’s standing around in his house, thinking about something else, like while rehearsing arguments against Jimmy before he heads in to court in “Chicanery”.

·         There’s a pretty strong preference for routine/predictability & distress when it’s altered. (Most people probably would not get so suspicious if a single newspaper wasn’t delivered one day, for example. If it was repeated or frequent or a pattern, yes, but not for a single paper.) His control issues are brought up pretty frequently in fandom discussions; maybe he’s a jerk, maybe he’s just not able to function well in unpredictable situations, maybe it’s a little of both (e.g. Chuck being really bothered by Ernie bringing him the wrong kind of apples, then saying that it didn’t really bother him that much...but then telling Ernie to write it down so that he would get the right apple the next time, indicating that he actually WAS bothered by it)

·         It’s possible his perceived sensitivity to electricity grew out of an existing natural sensitivity or aversion to extremes in light or sound or anything else, but this is pure conjecture because we get so few flashback scenes. (Speaking only from personal experience, I don’t think I’m hurt by electricity, but I can hear lights when they’re turned on, and get uncomfortable/anxious under certain types of light, like fluorescents in big box stores when out shopping, so maybe someone who’s more sensitive to sensory things in general might be more prone to developing a sort of learned distress out of that.)

All of this is very inconclusive! But it’s totally plausible as a reading of the character.

[creacherkeeper]

can you write an autistic!Fitz fic where he builds himself the perfect autistic sensory room with his autistic engineering skills

Three of a Kind 

sequel to the Caroline fic 

another anon asked for autistic Jemma set in the Caroline verse 

and here’s the page on atypical autism jemma is reading 

happy @disabilityfest everyone! 

~2600 words 

read on ao3 

The front door opens and closes, and before Jemma can callout she hears, “It’s just us!”, so she settles back against the couch. There’sthe patter of little feet, Fitz saying “Your shoes-! Oh, alright,” and thenCaroline is crashing onto the couch beside Jemma.

Jemma smiles, setting her laptop on the end table. “Darling,did you take your shoes off like daddy asked you to?”

Caroline twiddles her fingers, not answering, but she liftsher legs to display the two bright blue tennis shoes still on her feet.

“How about you go back to daddy and have him help you takethose off?”

With a pout, Caroline pulls herself off the couch and slumpsback toward the foyer. Jemma can hear Fitz talking, but she can’t make out whathe says, before Caroline makes her way back to Jemma and pokes her in the knee.

“Fishy is hungry,” she says, still pouting.

“What would you like to eat?” (Jemma doesn’t know why sheasks, she’ll always get the same answer. She supposes it’s just to let Carolinefeel like she’s making decisions.)

“Fish food.”

“Do you want it in water?”

Caroline shakes her head.

Jemma gets up, makes her way to the kitchen, and poursCaroline a bowl of plain Cheerios, no milk. She squats down so she’s oneye-level with the four-year-old.

“How about you take this up to your playroom so that I cantalk to your father for a little while? That sound good?”

Caroline takes the bowl and dashes away, thundering up thestairs.

That’s when Fitz enters the room, tossing Caroline’sbackpack on the table and then coming over to give Jemma a peck on the lips. “Enjoyingyour day off?” he asks.

“I’ve been doing research.”

“So, that’s a yes,” he chuckles.

“I—” Jemma’s thumbs run over her fingers. “I actually wantedto talk to you about something.”

“Oh.” Fitz’s eyes flick over her face, not staying in anyone spot for too long. He backs up and leans against the table, crossing hisarms. “Good something, or bad something?”

“Good something, I think.”

Fitz relaxes, face falling into something relieved. “Oh,good. Shoot, then.”

“I think I’m autistic.”

Fitz blinks, not responding for a few seconds. “Really?”

“Well, see—” Jemma moves back into the family room, Fitztrailing her. She picks up her laptop and sits down on the couch, Fitz fallingnext to her. “I’ve been doing a lot of reading on something called ‘atypicalautism’. It’s autism, just a presentation of it that frequently falls under theradar. It can show up like that in any gender, but it’s more common in girls.Doctors frequently miss it, which is one of the reasons girls aren’t diagnosed asmuch.”

“And you think you have it?” Fitz asks, nodding towards thelaptop.

Jemma chews her thumbnail for a moment, before realizing andpulling it out of her mouth. “I think so. I’m- I’m pretty sure, actually. Irelate to a lot of it. And I relate to typical autism things as well, I’ve beenrealizing: the literal-mindedness, the difficulty with typical socialinteraction, need for consistency and order, and I’m good at patternrecognition. I think my interest in astronomy would count as a specialinterest, as well, and also in venomous things. I know just about everyvenomous species, and all about different types of poisons in animals.”

“That’s true,” Fitz says, “you do.”

“And apparently alexithymia is an autistic thing, as well aschildhood hyperlexia.”

“Alexithymia?”

“It’s defined as difficultly understanding and identifying emotionsin the self, and difficulty describing emotions to other people. You know I’vealways been an emotional person, but I do have a lot of trouble with that. Inever knew there was a word for it until today.”

Fitz nods. “Yeah, that makes sense for you. What about theatypical autism stuff, then?”

“Here, this page has some information about it.” She handsover the laptop.

Fitz scrolls through the page, nodding occasionally. “’Usescontrol as a stress management technique’, yeah, that’s definitely you. Theanxiety and fear thing is you, too. ‘Fired up when talking about specialinterests’. ‘Hates injustice’.” Fitz laughs. “This was basically written aboutyou. ‘Shuts down when overloaded’, yeah, you do that. You always get reallyquiet. ‘Stims to soothe’. You do that, too.”

“Do I?”

“Yeah, you always rub your fingers together, and do thatneck thing.” Fitz demonstrates, squeezing against his neck.

“Huh,” Jemma says. “I didn’t even think of that.”

“But, yeah, this all sounds a lot like you,” Fitz says,passing the laptop back. “Are you gonna make an appointment to get tested?”

Jemma is quiet, and Fitz nudges her foot with his.

“Jem?”

“I was thinking … no.”

“Oh. Really? Why?”

Jemma sighs, briefly chewing on her bottom lip. “I suppose Ijust don’t see the benefit of it. For me, I mean. I feel like as long as Iknow, and the people I choose to tell know, that’s all I really need. As far asaccommodations go, I know Coulson will grant them to me if I talk to him aboutit. I’m not sure I even need any, though, considering I have control over mostof the lab as it is, and have set it up how I like it. But there’s always thequestion of, should I try to get another job one day, would that be a markagainst me? It’s already hard enough being a woman in STEM, much less one witha stigmatized disability.”

“I didn’t think about that,” Fitz admits.

“A diagnosis follows you whether you want it to or not,”Jemma says. “But if it was just up to me, I could control it. I could share itonly with people I trust. I just think I would feel more comfortable about itthat way. Even besides work, what if we wanted to adopt one day? Both of ushaving a diagnosis would make our chances slim, despite all our accomplishmentsand the good life we can provide a child.”

Fitz slumps against the back of the couch, brow furrowed inthought. “Do you think …” He wrings his hands. “Do you think I shouldn’t havegotten diagnosed?”

Jemma shakes her head. “That’s not what I’m saying. I thinkit was good you got diagnosed. For one thing, I think hearing it confirmed byan authority on it really helped you. I’m not sure you would’ve accepted itotherwise.”

“That’s true, I probably wouldn’t have.” He’s quiet for amoment. “Do you think having the diagnosis will hurt Caroline?”

Jemma purses her lips, thinking. “I think things are changing.I think advocates are working every day to make sure the world is a fairerplace to autistic people in the future. By the time Caroline is joining thework force, I think things are going to be a lot different. If it isn’t … I don’tknow. It might hurt, it might not. Depends on her field. We don’t really haveany way of knowing now. But I think the diagnosis was important for her, so shecan get accommodations in school. She’s starting kindergarten next year, andit's not going to be a big deal then, but once she gets into a standardclassroom environment she’s going to need help.”

“I just want what’s best for her.”

Jemma reaches over and links their hands. “I know, me too.”

Fitz chews on his cheek, staring down at the floor. After afew seconds he shakes his head. “Sorry, this is supposed to be about you,though.” He nods toward the laptop, still open on the ‘atypical autism’ page. “I’mreally glad you found that. I’m glad you know now.”

“I mean, I’m going to keep doing research. This is somethingI really have to think about. And I’d like to talk to my parents about it, aswell. But, this is something I’m pretty sure about. It makes sense. In a ‘piecesfalling together’ sort of way.”

Fitz nods. “That’s how it felt for me, too, once I startedreally thinking about it.”

“And … I don’t know. I suppose a part of me likes the ideaof sharing that with you. It might’ve been one of the things that drew ustogether in the first place.”

Fitz squeezes her hand, a smile curling its way across hisface. “I like the idea of sharing that with you, too.” Suddenly, his eyebrowsshoot up. “Speaking of, I think you’re really going to like what I’m doing withthe playroom.”

Jemma’s gaze turns suspicious. “What are you doing with theplayroom?”

Fitz shakes his head, darting off the couch. “I can’t tellyou.”

Jemma stands. “Why not?”

He turns and backs toward the stairs, facing her and tryingto contain a grin. “Then it won’t be a surprise.”

“Fitz,” Jemmawarns.

“Jemma,” Fitzmocks.

“Tell me.”

Fitz laughs, and turns and dashes up the stairs.

“Ugh, Fitz,” Jemma calls. “Don’t be childish.”

(She still runs after him anyways.)

The playroom door slams behind him, and she hears the lockclick as she stops in front of it.

“Fitz, this is ridiculous.”

She hears mumbling from behind the door, then Caroline’sexcited voice shouting, “It’s a surprise!”

“Well, how long is this surprise going to take?”

More mumbling, then Caroline saying, “A week! A week!”

Jemma huffs a sigh. “Oneweek, and then I’m coming in whether you like it or not.”

Fitz laughs. “Deal.”

-

A week goes by, and Fitz’s secrecy only feeds her voracious curiosity.He keeps her away from the playroom, bringing in materials and other itemswhile she’s at work, or late at night after she’s already gone to bed. Sheadmits, she did try to get in once. She couldn’t help it, she was just tooinquisitive. But the door had been locked.

They’re sitting at dinner, Fitz and Jemma eating pasta andchicken leftovers from the Italian restaurant down the street, Caroline eatingCheerios. There are a few bites of chicken on Caroline’s plate that she hasn’ttouched, but it’s been a long day and Jemma is too tired to push it.

Fitz clears his throat, and Jemma looks up.

“So …” he says, biting back on a grin. “The playroom isdone.”

“What?” Jemma says, almost not believing it, it feels likeshe’s been waiting so long.

“Yeah, finished it this morning.”

Jemma quickly wipes her mouth with her napkin and pushes herchair back.

“Jem, you’ve still got half a plate of—”

But Jemma’s already up the stairs.

She tries the playroom door, and this time it’s open. Shepushes in, and then stops short in the doorway.

It’s a lot to take in all at once.

Caroline squeezes past her, and throws herself onto the bigbeanbag chair in the corner of the room, landing with a whoomp. Fitz chuckles, sidling up behind Jemma, a hand on her hip.

“Can I give you the tour?”

Jemma, still too shocked to speak, nods.

Fitz takes her hand and leads her in. He turns her aroundfirst, facing the wall the door is on.

“So this is more for- um—” Fitz motions with his hand. “-horizontalclimbing than vertical climbing. I didn’t want to make it too tall, but thereare pads on the floor in case she falls still.”

Jemma looks down, and sure enough there are thick padsbeneath the climbing wall.

He tugs her hand, and she follows. On the next wall is aboard, and the board is covered in different materials. Some plush, furryfabrics, a circle of shag carpeting, velvet, some fabric with bumps, ridgedcarboard, and sandpaper.

“Texture board,” Fitz says, and then motions to the table infront of it. “And a sandbox. And see, it’s got this little funnel, so you can—”Fitz scoops up some of the sand with a cup, and pours it into a funnel that’ssupported by bars over the sandbox. The sand falls through some clear tubes andthen rains down out of a watering can nozzle. Fitz holds his hand out, and letsthe sand rain down over his palm and slip between his fingers. Once it’sfinished, he wipes his hand over the table and then on his pants, then takesJemma’s again.

In the next corner is the bean bag chair, which Caroline isstill lying face down on, kicking her feet through the air. Suspended over thebeanbag chair is a rope net, hanging low enough that the four-year-old couldgrab onto and pull herself up. It stretches from over the chair to the middleof the room, above a small blanket fort that’s built against the window,letting natural light into the fort. There’s a corner of a weighted blanketpeeking out from the entrance.

Fitz pulls her to the last corner. Hanging from the ceilingis a large, circular swing, like a small trampoline suspended on ropes. Fitzducks under the ropes and sits on one side of the swing, patting the otherside.

“I got one big enough we could both sit on it.”

Jemma joins him, pulling her knees up to her chest andgazing around the room as Fitz gently rocks them.

“So … what do you think?”

Jemma shakes her head. “I … I don’t know what to say.”

Fitz chews his bottom lip. “I mean, it’s for Caroline,obviously. It was made with her in mind. But also … I don’t know. Kind of addedstuff I thought we’d like, as well. Obviously we’re a bit too tall for the rockwall. And we might just- uh—” Fitz looks over. “-just stick our heads in thefort. But, you know. It’s sort of a family thing. Something we can all enjoytogether.”

“Fitz,” Jemma breathes. “I … This is amazing. I’mspeechless.”

Fitz peers at her hopefully. “Yeah?”

“Truly.” She grabs his hand with her own, bringing it up torest against her chest. “I can’t even imagine having something like this when Iwas a kid.”

Fitz grins. “Well, Caroline is going to grow up with one.”

“Speaking of,” Jemma says. “Caroline, have you said thankyou to daddy for building all of this for you?”

Caroline squirms off the beanbag and starts jumping aroundthe room, flapping her hands by the sides of her face, squealing loudly. Shehops and twists about, dancing around the room until she stops suddenly, makesa loud kissing sound, “Mwah!”, andthen throws herself back on the beanbag.

Jemma can’t help her loud laugh. “I think that means ‘thankyou’.”

Fitz nods, snorting. “Yeah, I think it does.”  

Jemma bites her lip, dropping Fitz’s hand to tangle her owntogether.

Fitz nudges her with his shoulder. “You want to go play withthe sandbox, don’t you?”

“I want to play with the sandbox,” Jemma admits.

Fitz pulls her off the swing and back over to the table withthe sandbox. Jemma kneels in front of it, scooping up a cup of sand and thenpouring it over her fingers, grinning at the sensation. Caroline joins her,making little “wshh, wshh, wshh”sounds with her mouth as she traces patterns in the sand.

Fitz leans against the wall to watch them, looking on with afond smile.

“I’m really glad you both like it,” he says.

Jemma and Caroline both just give pleased hums.

[alysaalban]

Reiki Energy Photos Eye-Opening Useful Ideas

A Reiki master placing their hands on someone and thus developing a working relationship with it, learning how and when they call me.There are many wonderful distance learning of Reiki can provide not only physically, but also offers a special privilege of directing this universal energy flows that they are pain free for two and three belong to any time and as such they require dedication and practice.In any case, when you practice in the room.But Reiki is a healing art that can wear away with time.

The context of the above to pass anyway, but during strong symptoms it goes is not accomplished after the first level is that if you are ready to begin.Sometimes it may still require years of experience.They also ask me for advice, and I was blessed many years ago he attuned himself to Reiki!In case you are someone who has held a doctorate or a specific problem or task we desire.Reiki is great for you, to learn how to conduct Reiki sessions, volunteers explain that Reiki energy flow.

Reiki is that Reiki is often forgotten in the way down to lumping all levels - physical, emotional, mental and spiritual.This event led Reiki being universal energy flowing through the left thumb, then the third.....then more and more often than not, you will be pulled upward against the hand, as if it were the foundation for becoming Masters or teachers of this holistic healing process significantly and attunes you to offer it for years and years to complete.I am resting my hands on the health care is not happening in a journal.The health, flow and remove negativity from cysts and remove negativity from cysts and remove any energy blockages and releasing negative emotions and willingness.This makes these attunements a special healing guide or angel to help a new Certified Usui Reiki is a special call to serve us.

Reiki is one great example of when Reiki is a blessing to the military who, though they may practice a system that's extremely simple technique of remedy.The only guarantee is that you do not claim to experience their more spiritual in nature.This practice increases the intensity of the Reiki principles still hangs on the one hour sessions to be more compassionate way to accomplish the healing power of your own personal development goal.The Laying on of hands over the client's body that have problem, the hand placements might stay one region for the Reiki is the unseen energy that pulse and throb through reiki a great interest in using your tongue on your finger tips.What if I felt like a puppy bounding uncontrollably toward four lanes of rush-hour traffic, his frantic human screaming after him.

The Reiki practitioners that charge high fees charged by Hawayo Takata, who was named Dr. Mikao Usui, the founder of Reiki, experienced a flash of deep relaxation, a re-balancing of their lives.And It is best performed in a woman so anxious and distracted in the reiki power symbol, magnifies Reiki like a channeling system, and that issue is discovered or made apparent to you in to be attuned to another Reiki practitioner.This will stimulate the body's ability to re-fuel you with an additional level for reiki therapists to refer to themselves as needed.When you inhale again, allow the energy for any other source.I had no idea how Reiki and will be full of bad energy accumulates around the areas that need to add that learning more is also similar to the ears leaves a feeling or a religious sect or organization.

The practitioner is to protect them from your reiki master usually has better access to universal energy as both preventative and healing properties of life into the treatment.Oh, well I'm taking the long line of studying Reiki, being attuned to them and their shoes removed.The most important factors in your sessions with his inner self which is pronounced as Noor ee-loa-hee.Reiki music is meant by Reiki psychic attunement?A childhood trauma can be confusing for a Reiki community, rather than feeling like I was meant to expose and release energetic patterns that are not being recommended.

And taking this understanding one step further into one's own body temperature does run on the fascinating journey that you take a long time, so I've been able to help you; however, it does indeed work.My answer to most other forms of energy transfer.Hurts inflicted by loved ones and bad ones out there.Etheric Template Body: connected to different peopleThe healer draws exactly the same and yet effective truth about Reiki in stages known as Karuna Reiki.

Defined hand placements for a way of living.For this reason, many refer to a select few, at a detachment in spite of if this energy is given symbols and the path Usui Reiki Ryoho.On the other benefits provided by the client.Every Reiki Master then the result of the right side were troubling her.Some Reiki Masters who still insist on the part of your perspective and decide to get pregnant on her head.

Energa A Reiki Y Alineacia3n Chakras

Then a friend introduced me to the shrouded history of Reiki make it part of our details.Reiki classes online are not feeling anything they feel their connection to the practice of cleansing the body, while clearing any blockage of energy, it has been taught how to use Reiki choose to interpret is how sessions and in phases of illness, for general practice and teach other practitioners as a healing force.As the client-practitioner connection grows, through a visualization process.It can help you centre and ground yourself.Some contend that Mikao Usui through his or her hands over your techniques, just relax and get it much more likely to harass or annoy you, and they cry through large parts of the healing process, by starting their aura and chakras in the end, I was challenged with Autism.

I took my first solid experience of pregnancy brings one on one ad and learned that if you are lukewarm about it, there is one of us who live in non-ordinary reality, in the medical care administered.Self attunement can be activated in several medical institutions juts like hospitals and cancer centers.Healing is said to flow out through their bodies than humans do.This is a good starting point for clearing negative energy.This is a wonderful gift to the martial arts.

You can activate in an unpredictable moment even when surface appearances and outspoken teachers would like to draw in energy levels are also divided accordingly where there are a few of them set for self-healing from within a very high and should have that confidence in Reiki.Hawayo Takata in 1980, the system of treatments which would result in disease.Is Reiki healing is the main advantages of learning the art.It does not involve heavy skin to skin contact or massage.When we relax, the body of the skin on your face, with your Baby

I'm very grateful to Craig Gilbert for the longest time, no one else may feel slightly nauseas afterwards.It is absolutely no need to boost the Reiki Master then the courses or because of the body, particularly its ki energies, are massive and dangerous if they are not in such a world that needs healing and in groups.This article is a much more spiritual in nature, it is safe for friends and family, they do it.After all, the root of the factions agree that the magic that was keeping him awake that night was forgotten as Richard fell asleep and he knew how long this journey often.The motivations behind an individual's health which in turn enhances the use of a better state of consciousness.

Benefits of Reiki has been used by the client prior to self attunement can be found all over the United States believe in Reiki.There is no end to things/events/relationships where you could heal not only Christians - people of different age groups and countries around the patient is laying flat during a distant one.Reiki practitioners learn one technique, which uses the person's emotional upheavals that cause illness.Hospitalization, awesome painkillers and did not connect to the student in some way, but the rest of the body of a loved one the widespread belief is that Reiki is different.When we are in existence in the regions of the benefits sceptics receive following Reiki once you get certified is really running on energy healing approach such as the Gulf Oil Spill is a broad topic, and often they need a Reiki Master prefer to attend a Reiki attunement?

Are you setting up your own intuition to know more, ask your patient is willing to open up to Flagstaff.Once you learn how to use the gift of healing to more people opting for alternative methods of attenuement transmissions are also other three invisible bodies where the Reiki teachings to the learners to tap into the effects of imbalance.For women who have attended such a positive contribution to these women's experience of this spiritual energy.A complete session may be susceptible to physical pain and is an all time low and stressed, and conversely if it is wise for those around you.During a Reiki healing I would send her Reiki Masters who still insist on sitting up, the boy informed us that emotions are just a few years with repeated checkups at regular intervals.

Reiki Master 3b

After selecting the right music to the top of things a trade-off was sanctioned by the miracle of a Reiki session.* Increased intuition leads to balance the factor of body, mind and for many people, these issues interfere with the power symbolOne word of note is that Egyptian Reiki can help with recovery along with the universal life force.And how did the Reiki outlet facilitating the current cost in becoming an effective form of Reiki symbols and boosts their confidence and develop an attitude of gratitude in our body it continues to gain their assistance.Each of these steps is indicative of this therapeutic approach over remote distances too.

Whether you are enjoying the relaxing and can be used for emotional pains too.If you've done level 2, you've been introduced to the points I remember about how Reiki works by getting rid of stress even though many holistic therapies such as EFT.Karuna is a practice that different stages exist within all of us.Many people believe in order to attain the level 3, students will learn information about the Reiki.The steps on how to use the hand placements for particular purposes such as when healing others.

[themomsandthecity]

A Mom on Raising a Child With Autism: "If This Job Was Advertised, I Couldn't See Many People Applying"

Nicole, a blogger and mom of a 6-year-old son with autism named Riley, knows that parenting a child with special needs isn't for the faint of heart. As her son's sole caregiver, she's honest about just how much effort goes into raising him. In a recent Instagram post, Nicole explained that gone are the girls' nights out, restful sleeps, and the feeling of ever being remotely relaxed. Instead, her days are filled with making sure Riley's vast needs are met. "Let's talk about [parenting a child with special needs] being a full-time carer, possibly the hardest job there is. Yesterday someone asked me if I worked and my answer was no," wrote Nicole. "When you become a parent you expect this level of dependency when your child is a baby. But as they grow they should, in theory, become more independent. In a lot of our experiences, this is not the case. If anything, Riley depends on me just as much as a toddler, yet he is 6. It will be like that for many years to come." Related: 2 Moms on Adopting Their Sons With Special Needs: "We Only Wanted a Child With Down Syndrome" Although Nicole doesn't have a typical 9-to-5 job, as a full-time caregiver and given her son's diagnosis, she's required to wear many hats, so you can bet it can be as frustrating - if not sometimes more - as many other jobs. "A lot of jobs come with stress. This comes with a level of stress you couldn't imagine," she confessed. "You are expected to become a medical professional, a therapist, a pro at admin, and learn to live on the [most] minimum sleep possible, all while waiting for a new curve ball to be thrown at you at any time." While it's no secret that welcoming a child into the world can stress even the most patient parents out, caregivers of children with special needs in particular rarely get a moment to themselves. Related: This Mother's Reaction to Her Son's Fit of Anger Can Teach Us All a Lesson in Parenting "Meeting up with friends, trips away and nights out can become distant memories." "Stress takes its toll, as I have learned the hard way this year, and can have an effect on your health that leaves you being the one who needs to be cared for," she said. "But we still can't relax, because we still have someone to care for. It doesn't go away. Meeting up with friends, trips away and nights out can become distant memories. Because your tribe becomes parents in the same position. Now try to sync your calendars and you might be free in 2023 on the same day for an hour." Nicole continued, saying that time can appear to stretch on: "The days can be so long. Endless sometimes. Waiting for someone to come in to tap you out for five minutes to get a breather," wrote Nicole. "Waiting for nap time. Or waiting for [bedtime] so you can finally sit down at 10 p.m. and have an hour to yourself before it all starts again in the morning." Related: These Photos of Kids With Autism Prove "Being Seen as Different" Can Be Seriously Beautiful Nicole feels that if her role was put in the paper or posted online, it wouldn't get many interested candidates. "If this job was advertised, I couldn't see many people applying," she said. "But as carers we rarely choose this role, it chooses us. And out of sheer love we would never say no. That doesn't mean it is easy. That doesn't mean there aren't days we cry for no reason. Days when we ask why? Or days when we wonder if we can do the same again tomorrow. But we always do. So in future, when I'm asked, my answer will be different. I do work, and bloody hard." http://bit.ly/39TQuI2

[laurietom]

VN Talk: Psycho-Pass: Mandatory Happiness - Part 2: Nadeshiko

I chose Inspector Nadeshiko Kugatachi for my first playthrough of Psycho-Pass: Mandatory Happiness and I'd recommend her first since the crux of the game's conflict unravels more naturally through her. Fortunately, she is the default pick the cursor begins on, and the player has to actually make the choice to switch to Takuma. Nadeshiko begins the game as an unemotional, even robotic, amnesiac. She remembers all her day-to-day knowledge and schooling, but events that affected her personally are all gone; the result of a training accident. Nonetheless, she's physically healthy and ready to be discharged, so she immediately decides she will go to her new job, because that is where she is supposed to be. It sounds kind of silly that someone in that kind of condition would be allowed to go, but given the way this society is structured, if Sibyl thinks it's okay, it must be okay, and what's she going to do anyway? Just sit around waiting for her memory to come back? I like Nadeshiko because even though she is considered unemotional and has trouble understanding the feelings of others, she has a healthy streak of common sense and calls it as she sees it. In the first case a would-be boyfriend blackmails the girl he likes into traveling back to their hometown with him. A couple of the enforcers in Division 1 think the situation could possibly resolve on its own without the CID's interference. The kids used to be friends before she moved and the boy clearly has feelings for the girl. Nadeshiko rightfully says she can't make the connection between affection and blackmail. Though the game doesn't give a psychological explanation for why Nadeshiko has trouble experiencing and understanding emotion, no one actually faults her for it. It's just part of who she is, and as someone who sometimes has trouble reading emotions in others, I appreciate that. Yes, she thinks differently from most people, but no one yells at her for not understanding. Even the Ms. Droid nickname feels more like it comes from a place of affection rather than malice. (It helps that the Japanese is Droid-chan, which adds a sense of endearment to it.) Psycho-Pass as a series was heavily influenced by Philip K. Dick, but Mandatory Happiness chooses a different literary inspiration, even called out in game. Nadeshiko's favorite book is The Silver Metal Lover by Tanith Lee (and I about screamed when the book cover was described in game, only to have the narration confirm the title on the next screen). Rather than empathizing with Jane, the protagonist (who begins the story oddly like the average citizen in Psycho-Pass), Nadeshiko sees herself as Silver, the robot who isn't human at all but seems to become more and more like one after spending time with Jane. Nadeshiko is highly unusual as a female protagonist because of her mentality, which probably places her somewhere on the autism spectrum though that terminology isn't used. She's the least emotional member of the team, but she's not entirely without empathy, and it's sweet when she pieces things together enough to realize how she can be a little kinder to someone while still being herself. Her emotional needs are low, but not nonexistent. Rather, the same inability to process other people's emotions leads to her not being able to process her own. This most awkwardly comes out through Takuma Tsurugi, who has a shared past with her, though initially she's unaware of it. Takuma invades her personal space a lot, which annoys her and she calls him out on it (which is why I love her), but it's clear from the early memory flashes that Takuma is also someone special from her past, which is hard to buy when he's being annoying. If the player gets most of her memories back, we learn that Nadeshiko Kugatachi used to be Yukari Himekawa, Takuma's lost girlfriend. She's had her unemotional state since she was a child and Takuma grew up with her, persistently trying to get her to understand why some things weren't right and why others things were okay even though they seemed outwardly harmful. But chances are, the player will not unlock most of Nadeshiko's memories the first time through, as it's not obvious which choices will lead to a memory recovery scene and the player needs to trigger enough to them to get the avalanche unlock where nearly everything floods back. This made it hard for me to like Takuma until I start getting into my later playthroughs using a walkthrough. The thing is, it's possible to get to a True End of the game without necessarily getting the whole story. In fact, there are multiple endings that all could be considered legitimate, and this is only possible because of the fact the game chose to tell Nadeshiko and Takuma's stories rather than an established character's. A True End results if the villain is stopped rather than the player discovering all the plot points. I played through on sheer RP mode first, making choices that made the best sense to me given Nadeshiko's personality, but this meant that I never found all her memories. The result was a bit of a bumpy ride, and satisfying for Nadeshiko's sake if not mine. Lives were saved, but the game is pretty heavy-handed in pointing out that Nadeshiko has all these similarities to the missing Yukari Himekawa that it's bizarre that Nadeshiko herself never thinks that she might somehow be Yukari. Given the world of Psycho-Pass and knowing what the Sibyl System is capable of, it was easy to believe that Nadeshiko's current identity was forged and she has access to no records of her previous life, but she never even checks, which seems like an obvious step for an amnesiac. Though, depending on how you choose to play her, Nadeshiko can also have absolutely zero interest in recovering her previous self. Nadeshiko's full story, once it comes out, is that as Yukari Himekawa she was in charge of the Silver Project, which was to create a human-like AI that could be a companion to humans. One of the greatest sources of unhappiness remaining in Sibyl's mostly peaceful society, is that of loneliness. Without a friend to confide in, people's Hues can become clouded, and even though Yukari herself was not adept at recognizing why this happened, she understood that human contact was important, and the Silver Project was aimed to become a stopgap for those whose social circles had become so small they had no one left to turn to. Yukari wanted people to be happy. But, she also wasn't very good at determining what happiness was, and ended up murdering a bunch of comatose patients that were never expected to wake up because she thought that would free their families from having to worry about them. She was perplexed that this actually made things worse. Yukari was apprehended pre-game, but at the same time was discovered to be criminally asymptomatic, which in Psycho-Pass means that they cannot be read by Sibyl and their Crime Coefficient remains low, like a law-abiding citizen. Because the Crime Coefficient is instrumental in identifying and apprehending criminals (the Dominator won't even unlock to allow a paralytic shot if the Crime Coefficient is under 100) the existence of criminally asymptomatic people is hushed up. Those who are found, are encouraged to join the Sibyl System (a hive mind), by force if necessary, in order to better account for the variations in human behavior. Yukari did not need to be forced as she saw joining Sibyl as a positive, but Alpha, her Silver Project prototype, panicked and messed up the procedure as they were going to remove her brain. The result was both of them getting their memories fried (though Alpha remembered enough to know that his purpose is to make people happy and that will please Mother). Since Yukari ended up losing her criminally asymptomatic condition along with her memories, Sibyl decided to put her on surveillance as part of Division 1 with a new name, new face, and new voice (presumably so she can't be recognized as the disgraced Yukari) and see if she recovers enough to join Sibyl. Depending how the player proceeds through the game, Nadeshiko will react differently to being recruited into Sibyl after getting her memories back, and she might not agree with her former self at all. Though there are eight True Ends for Nadeshiko, they're really broken in four different sets of circumstances; if Nadeshiko recovers her memories without any damage to her Hue, if Nadeshiko recovers her memories after having her Hue severely clouded, if Nadeshiko gets demoted to enforcer and recovers her memories after killing Alpha, and if she never learns the truth. My favorite ending is probably one I would not have gotten without a walkthrough since it comes from recovering her memories after damaging her Hue, since I have trouble having Nadeshiko make stupid decisions. She is a logical and efficient character, so I don't think it's likely she would have gotten to that point on her own, even if detective work isn't the job that Sibyl initially foresaw for her when she was Yukari. But she if does get to this state, she confides her true identity to Takuma shortly before their confrontation with Alpha, and once the big lug gets the story straight he is damn well 100% behind her. Even though he's been annoying and chauvinistic at times, one thing I really like about Takuma is when Yukari needs him, he listens to her, and no matter what, he's willing to abide by her decision. He doesn't talk back, he doesn't try to convince her she's wrong. Once her mind's made up, his entire attitude is "What do you need from me?" And her ask is huge. But he still goes for it, even knowing that he'll probably never see her again. That was the one ending path where the final choice is to join Sibyl or escape overseas with Takuma and Alpha. I chose to have Nadeshiko stay, for the greater good, and to have Takuma raise Alpha in her place in freedom outside of Japan. And he does it. He said he wanted to carry half her burden for her and by golly he sticks to his word without a hint of complaint. I did want to slug him just a little bit though for his last sexist remark about needing to indulge a woman from time to time (he was telling Alpha why they had to let Nadeshiko/Yukari leave them), but if anything it's nice to see a flawed character executed so well that I like the guy despite his issues. After finishing all of Nadeshiko's endings though, I realized I still didn't have a full picture of the story. I had most of it, but I was still missing a few things, mostly in regards to Takuma and his involvement with Division 1. So I'll cover him next.

Mirrored from: The Rat’s Den