#and go 'haha you're such a loser you can't talk on the phone' as an insult...

[gloriousmonsters]

'i wish x was oppressed' jokes are never funny to me but i'm completely lost over that 'i wish tall calm boyfriends and short anxious girlfriends who can't order their own food were oppressed' post. literally what is the issue with that and why does it inspire such vitriol

[i-literally-cant-with-this]

A/N ::: Kat. That's all I'm gonna say. That and Ilysm. Thank you! Also, fuckin' dumb ass fonts and my dumb ass. Ty, Mack, for pointing that out. It looked so normal on my end!

Kat's Idea ::: All I'm saying is...coughs Hanma fucking her brutally and brat taming her while reader is gossiping and on the phone at the same time as he smokes and just listens in while plunging into her causally

C/W ::: Hanma x Bimbo.F.Reader, gossipy slut getting fucked while he smokes and blatantly eavesdrops while he's pounding her into the mattress, unprotected sex

MDNI under the cut please and thank you

"Yoooo, she did - nghh - she did what? Fuck. I can't stand that bitch." Your eyes rolled back into your head as Hanma hit that sweet spot deep inside of you while you gossiped on the phone to your BFOTW (Best Friend Of The Week - you changed friends like you changed panties). Hanma always got a kick out of how fickle you were about who you surrounded yourself with. But ultimately, they were all fucking idiots.

Your stupid was just a little more special brand than theirs, though. He didn't find it endearing, per se. But he always found it entertaining. And Hanma was nothing if he wasn't an opportunist for entertainment. Especially when he was fucking you.

He lit a smoke and turned his face to blow it away from you while languidly gliding his cock in and out of your dripping hole. You were so wet for him, even with the phone in your hand. You were such a brat, too, always demanding his attention. But he could never deny you.

"Oh my god, bitch. That's insane! She really thinks that shit's gonna work on him? She must be stupid or something. God, I'm so glad I don't have to deal with her anymore." You giggled as Hanma slowly rubbed your clit, his touch feather light and teasing.

He winked at you and pinched your clit and nipples simultaneously, holding his cigarette between his lips.

You put your friend on speaker but muted the mic so you could talk to him. "Shu ... fuuuck feel s'good, baby. Can't wait for you to cum in me. Missed your cock all day." You whispered to him, your eyes half-closed with pleasure.

Hanma just chuckled and kept smoking, fucking you slowly, relishing in the feel of your tight cunt clenching around him.

You unmuted your phone and got back to your superficial bestie. "Are you busy?" They asked, hearing the telltale slapping sounds in the background of your call.

"Mm? Whuh? Oh! Haha, no, not busy, not really. Han is here with me. We're just fucking and stuff. You know how it is." You said casually, as if it was normal to be getting your pussy pounded while gossiping on the phone.

"Oh my god, you slut!" Your friend yelled at you.

"What? Don't tell me you've never been fucked while you're on the phone? Loser. God." You laughed, reaching out to brush Hanma's bangs back away from his sweat-covered face. "So beautiful, Han. Love you so much, baby. Anyway, girl. Did he buy that bullshit she was tryna sell him?"

Hanma pulled back nearly all the way out of you and then slammed back into you roughly, making you gasp and moan into the phone.

"Fuck, baby! Fuck that dick's so good! Just like that. Harder, please." You whined, forgetting that your friend was on the line.

"Should I let you guys ... oh, I don't know, you need to go?"

"Bitch please, 'm just gettin' dicked down by my man. 'S not a big deal, girl."

"Han, baby, can you fuck me harder, please? I wanna cum s'bad." You begged, pouting at him as he lazily stroked your clit and fucked you deep and slow.

He grabbed you by the throat and laughed. "You don't tell me how to do this. Got it, princess? I fuck you how I wanna fuck you and you enjoy it." He growled at you, squeezing your neck just enough to make you whimper.

"Sorry, baby. Won't happen again." You whispered, your voice hoarse from his grip.

Hanma smirked and let you go, reaching over for his smoke and taking a long drag. "Good girl. Now shut the fuck up and let me cum in you." He said, his voice low and dangerous.

"Yes, daddy. Anything you want. Love you so much. You make me so happy."

"Yeah? Tell me how happy you are, princess. Make me cum in your tight little cunt." Hanma cooed at you as he picked up the pace of his thrusts, angling himself to hit that perfect spot inside of you.

You moaned loudly and grabbed his hand, pressing it against your clit, begging for him to touch you. "Please, Han, please. Need it so bad. Love you so fucking much. You make me feel so fucking good." You said again.

Hanma smiled at you and rubbed your clit just how you liked it, watching as your eyes rolled back into your head. "Yeah, that's it, baby."

You started to tell your friend you had to get off of the phone now but he stopped you. "No. Stay on the phone. Want your dumbass friends to hear how fuckin' good I make you feel." He tipped his chin up, gesturing at you to tell the idiot you were talking on the phone to about how amazing he felt thrusting in and out of you.

"(Stupid friend's name) I - oh sh-shit - I'm getting the best dick of my life right now. Do you have any idea what the fuck that's like?" You moaned into the pillow next to your face on the bed. Hanma took another smoke from his pack and lit it, taking a long drag and blowing the smoke right at your face.

You inhaled defiantly and raised your hips to meet his. "Mm, so good. Right there, baby. Keep going."

"(Stupid friend's name), I can't even fucking talk right now. His dick feels so fucking good, and he's rubbing my clit with his fingers, and his other hand is all over me, and he's - nghh - fucking me so good. God, I'm gonna cum so hard." You cried out, reaching out to grab Hanma's cheek, pulling his face down towards yours for a kiss.

"You like this cock, baby? You like how it fucks you? Hm? Tell your little friend how much you love me." Hanma growled in your ear, biting your neck and making you cry out in pleasure.

"I love you so fucking much, Han. I don't know what I would do without you. You make me feel so fucking good. I want to be yours forever. I love you so fucking much."

Your friend couldn't believe what they were hearing. You were basically professing your love for Hanma while he fucked you, right there on the phone with them. They couldn't help but feel a little jealous.

Hanma smirked at you and took your phone out of your hand, pressing it against his ear. "Hey there, bitch. What's your name? Mm, well, I'm Shuji, of course. But you can call me never. I'm hangin' up now cuz my girl needs to give me her full attention. Stay tuned. Or don't. I really don't give a fuck what you do."

He hung up the phone, put out his cigarette in the ashtray on the nightstand and hooked his arms under yours and locked them around your back. He pulled you up against him, pressing your chests together as he fucked you hard and deep.

"That's it, princess. Let me hear you moan for me. Fuck, you sound so good." Hanma groaned, biting your neck again as you whimpered and writhed beneath him.

"Han, baby, please, can I cum? Please, let me cum for you. I love you so much," he laughed in your face at how needy you'd become over something as stupid as his cock. But he loved it. He couldn't deny that he loved it, a lot.

"Mm, since you asked so nicely, I suppose you can cum, princess." He said, smiling down at you as he fucked you faster and harder, hitting your clit just right as he pounded into you.

You cried out and came hard, clenching around him as your body shook and trembled with pleasure. "Fuck, Han. So fucking good. Thank you so much, baby."

Hanma moaned and thrust into you a few more times before pulling out and cumming all over your stomach and rubbing it around with the palm of his hand. He drew a little heart into the cum spread around on your pudgy belly.

"There. Love you too. It's written in the cum."

"Han?"

"What?"

"I think the phrase is 'It's written in the stars."

"No, 's not."

@katkusuo @kazutora-kurokawa @arlerts-angel @darkstarlight82 @viburnt @southside-otaku

[ghostiiess]

[NSB HEADCANONS] - carving pumpkins with ryan

✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧

pov: it's almost halloween and ryan bought two pumpkins for you and him to carve together and do the best looking pumpkins ever :)

warnings: some swears here and there

type: fluff

member: ryan nguyen (azngami)

REBLOGS AND LIKES ARE VERY APPRECIATED!

taglist! (Open! Send an ask if you'd like to be in it!) : @nsb-rkive @kentisbaby @firebenderwolf @hyuneee0 @yawnzzznnn @ghostyycat7

Bold can't be tagged.

so.. ryan was bored on a sunday afternoon

he was scrolling through his phone to cure his boredoom and saw an instagram post saying "buy pumpkins for halloween" (sorry i didn't had much inspiration for the add caption 💀😭)

ryan smiled and decided to go to the closest supermarket and brought two medium pumpkins for you and him

(More under the cut!)

he's just really creative

while you were doing your own things, ryan came into your room and smiled proudly of his projects that he wanted to do with you

"want to carve pumpkins with me?"

ofc, you said yes <3

and it immediately made him super happy

nguyen would have decorated the apartment with halloween decorations (i know ryan do not own an appartment since he's moving houses to houses with the boys, but let's say he have one with you lol) and spooky stuff around the differents room

i know ryan is a SIMP for christmas, but i also know he kinda like halloween (but not like he do for xmas haha)

ANYWAYS-

he would have put tablecloths or paper journals that you guys don't really use or read on your table to avoid a mess

this man brought even the little knife to do it perfectly

like.. this boy wanted to do this activity with you so bad

"i bet my pumpkins can be cuter than yours"

"lol, you wish"

"ooh y/n have some talk back? mmh i love it"

he smiled while saying that

"if you really think your chances to do an aesthetic and beautiful pumpkins are much higher than mine, then let's do a contest on our ig stories so the stars can vote. the loser have to do the dishes for the rest of the week and have to buy the other, snacks and drinks they want"

ryan love so much the stars

so you would agree to that challenge

and ofc, it would make him super happy

"alright, bet. we have 30 minutes to take all the inside out and we'll have 45 minutes to carve it. i'll put the timer"

"that's a serious challenge.."

"well yeah! if i have to carve pumpkins against my girlfriend, i better take it seriously. i would love to see you doing all the dishes and making me food" he said while laughing

he would definitively (try to) put pumpkin flesh on your face and on your nose

"sorry, it was too tempting"

he would laugh so much and take a lot of pictures

he love taking pictures with you

he love being loved by you <3

he would try his best to make you loose

"oh shit, yours is looking pretty sick.. mind if i add my little spice to it?"

"mind your little spice for later, i don't want to lose!"

"it'll make you win! you know how creative i am, right?"

"right.."

he would def carve something he found on pinterest or in google

' easy and funky carving pumpkins ideas '

" damn, these aren't easy! fuck that shit "

" i thought you were creative.."

"hey you, you know what, shut up, y/n!! mind your pumpkin!" he would say obvs laughing to make you know he's kidding

after that curving, he would be super proud of his pumpkin, but then... he would look at yours and be a bit jealous (just a little bit)

"woah.. y/n, you're really talented! it look fucking good and sick!! i love it!"

he tried his best

like literally

he wanted to win so so bad, but he know how great as an artist you are.. like, you could do whatever you want and it would still look sick and awesome

though, he would still be proud of his, he knew he wouldn't be able to win with your masterpiece

he would post a picture of both of your pumpkin and would add an instagram sticker with the choices (a poll lol) and would pray to win

he love seeing you winning because he can see you smile and can see how excited you are, but he still love winning times to times

after 30 minutes, he would check the results and see how he lost-

listen, he always thought you were a born artist, but he didn't know that his pumpkin was THAT bad looking?

ryan's pumpkin would probably look sick and super good, but you know.. the stars have choosen >:)

he was a bit sad, but at the same time, not really, because your smile when he told you, you won, was so worth it like?? his heart was filled with joy and happiness and excitment? ARGH THIS BOY LOVE YOUR SMILE SO MUCH

"i told you baby that i'll win"

he smirked

"yeah, yeah.. i guess, you're the real artist between us"

"don't say that, ry'! maybe you weren't born an artist but you're still good at dancing, at singing, at videos games.. ok, maybe not at smash, but still.."

"thank you baby.. HEY DID YOU SAY I WAS BAD AT SMASH?!"

"maybe, i did"

"alright, bet, you'll regret that, i'll beat your ass like i do every time when we play. you're going to be beat very easily"

then it turned into a videos games contest and let's say that even if you were trying your hardest, you lost.. sorry, not sorry

[galaxysharks]

*I'm actually enjoying this, I hope you are too because it'd just be spam instead-*

I have a thought and it's a sad one! It fits with an earlier post!

THEY WON! HAHA THEY WON THEY WON THEY WON COLOR WARS!

Maddox was so excited, Yellow team Wins!

She ran up to Madison and jumped into her arms, the taller girl laughing and swinging her around. EJ rolled his eyes as he hands Val a rag, Losers clean the canoes!

Madison: Gadget! You looked good out there, why don't we go celebrate?

Maddox: Sure Mad! Just let me help EJ get the decorations up in the barn, Proms tomorrow!

Madison seemed a little bummed, but brightened and told her to meet up by the old Susan Fine shrine.

Decorating took a few hours, but Maddox made a beeline right for the clearing once she was free.

Madison had set up an old blanket, with a lantern on the stones and some pillows propped up.

The girl herself was sitting, scrolling on her phone. She looked up and smiled at Maddie.

"there you are, you guys take forever! It's just a dance, does it really need that much attention?" She said as Maddox sat down beside her.

"hey, you know we can't have phones, and yes of course! It's tradition! What is all this anyway?" Madison kissed her cheek as she said this, continuing down her neck.

Madison pulls her to her chest and carefully peels away her jacket and overshirt. Maddox feels the skin of her arms raised and tense, unsure of what's happening.

"This, gadget, is so we can celebrate...alone"

"oh! Um, than-thank you. I uh, we all worked really hard today. Not-Not that we don't work hard everyday, but with Crash and the rock--"

"Maddox, I don't want to talk about Crash right now" Maddox's hand reaches to settle on the arm currently pulling at her shirt, untucking it from its carefully secured spot.

Maddox looks up at the trees as her girlfriend's other hand lightly tugs on her hair, tilting her head and opening up the rest of her neck. And that kind of feels nice, but Maddie thinks she would like to be hugged, less spit, and more time to think....

"Hey, c'mon what's with you, you've been hanging all over me since we got here, and now you're being shy?"

"n-no! I just--"

"Just relax! I'm not gonna hurt you! Don't you want to have your summer romance?"

"I, y-yes..?"

"Good! I'll help you, just lay back...."

Maddox feels strange, but that's normal. It's supposed to be strange. She's just a little tired, she'll feel better in the morning....

Val had a slightly concerned and confused little smile at lunch before prom the next day. It seemed like she wanted to say something, but didn't know how. Maddox wasn't paying any mind to it though, she had bigger things to worry about. Everything she did seemed to annoy Madison today, and Maddox didn't get it, she was so happy last night! Wasn't she?

Whatever, she'll ask about it at prom...

[dotster001]

Personal Finance

Summary: Mammon x gn! Reader. Getting the avatar of greed on a budget is not super straightforward.

"Mammon."

"Sorry, babe, I can't be tied down."

"Mammon, I'm serious about this."

"I'm a wild card, meant to be free, not that a human could ever understand."

"Just give up, Y/N," Asmo interrupted your discussion. "Mammon's too stupid to ever go on a budget."

"Hey!" Mammon shouted, turning to face Asmo. "What're ya tryin' to say? I'm not stupid."

"LOL, Stupid Mammon couldn't stay on a budget for more than an hour before cracking," Levi cackled, not looking up from his phone.

Mammon quickly turned back to you, determination written on his face. "Alright. Hit me with it. Put me on a budget."

You weren't sure if his brothers had truly meant to insult him, or if it was a reverse psychology move, but you were grateful.

"Awesome! I'm so proud of you Mams…." You began, pulling out papers to work it out on, until he interrupted.

"If I stay on it for a week, those losers owe me whatever I want," he gave his signature grin, which always melted your heart, but in this case was unappreciated.

"Mams…." You scowled.

"Deal,"Asmo said with a grin. 

"Easy win," Levi laughed. "In fact I'm so certain we'll win, that I'm raising the stakes. Whoever wins, gets uninterrupted Y/N time for a full week."

"You're so on!" Mammon grinned. "The prize is as good as mine!"

                                      ….

"Psst. Hey, Satan?" You whispered.

"Yeah?"

"Why is Mammon wearing noise blocking headphones?"

You were sitting in the back row of class, right next to Satan, when you noticed Mammon a few rows ahead of you wearing noise cancelling headphones.

Satan grinned. "Notice how Asmo and Levi are on both sides of him, whispering and showing their phones to each other ever so subtly. They're worried, because there's only one day left for Mammon to leave his budget. So they're constantly talking about things he should buy, because he already used up his "entertainment", "miscellaneous" and "clothing" budgets."

"And the headphones are to block them out?" You asked, to which Satan nodded. "Aw I'm so proud of him!" 

"He might die if he could hear you," Satan laughed.

                              ….

Mammon sauntered into your room, staring at his watch, and followed closely by a rather aggressive Levi and Asmo.

"3, 2, 1! Y/N! I did it! The great Mammon is unstoppable!" Mammon shouted, picking you up in a hug, and spinning you until you couldn't think.

"Nooo!" Asmo shrieked in despair.

"I can't believe we were bested by stupid Mammon," Levi whispered.

"Haha! That will show you not to mess with the great Mammon. Now get outta here! It's my Y/N time for the whole week. AND! Asmo, you will be paying off the witches for this month, and Levi you will be buying me that golden pair of sunglasses ya showed me," he said with a self satisfied grin, ushering the other two demons out of your room.

When they were gone, he scooped you up again, and pressed his forehead to yours. "I did it Y/N, and I wouldn't do it for just anyone, so ya better be grateful."

You giggled, and pressed a kiss to his nose. "I knew I could count on my first man to win this one."

"Good," he sputtered, blood rushing to his face, "and don't ever forget it."

He kissed you passionately, then, looking like an excited puppy, "I'm taking ya out to dinner tonight. Since Asmo's paying the witches this month, I have a little room in my debt payment budget to spend on ya."

"I'd like that a lot. I'm proud of you, I hope you know that," you hummed.

He beamed, and began to carry you out the door.

"Hey Mams, how much money is left in this month's budget?"

"This month!?"

[starlightxsvt]

Pink Dress 4 || Joshua Hong au

Pairing: badboy!Joshua x female reader

Genre: slice of life, slight angst, some crack

Warnings: some cursing

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

"So you're the one who splashed water on Joshua yesterday." Someone speaks from beside you and you look around to see Jeonghan. You are standing in front of the counter of the cafe near your college after class and you didn't really except to meet any of Joshua's friends there.

"Ah, yes..." You whisper at the horrible memory and look behind Jeonghan to see Joshua with Seungcheol taking a seat.

Oh shit.

"Joshua never really introduced us to each other so let me do that. Hi, I'm Jeonghan." He holds out his hand. You shake it and mumble, "I'm Y/n." He gives you a smile right before your order arrives and you excuse yourself from him in a hurry.

"Your dear ex and his friends are here," Seokmin says as you put down the tray of drinks in front of him and take a seat.

"So?"

"No, I'm just saying."

"Thank you for helping me with such a valuable information, Min." You roll your eyes. He chuckles before looking past you, towards where Joshua is sitting, "He's staring holes into your back. Oh shit- he's looking at me. I think I'm gonna pee my pants. He looks like he wants to rip off my throat." Seokmin whispers.

"Then stop looking at him, dummy." You knee him under the table. "Maybe we should get out of here," he says picking up his drink.

"Geez, you're such a pussy." You sip your drink, laughing at his actions. He really knows how to overreact.

"What are you gonna do if he pours a drink over you now as revenge? What if it's hot?" He whispers.

"Well, um, he won't," you say and mutter, "At least I hope so."

"Don't expect me to save your ass. I'll just run."

"Yeah I know, that's what I expect of you," you roll your eyes.

"Oh shit- he's walking towards us. Shit, you're dead Y/n," Seokmin hisses before abruptly standing up.

"Wait, no- you asshole, come back-" Seokmin rushes towards the bathroom before you can finish.

"Y/n," a soft and calm voice says from behind you and you swallow, half expecting a drink to be poured on your head. You turn around quietly and meet Joshua's eyes who stands there hands in his pockets.

"Can we...speak for a while?"

Oh shit. You rack your brain to come up with an excuse, " Right now? Um, uh, I'm a bit busy... as you can see." You point to the books on the table in front of you.

Joshua presses his lips together in rather displease before replying, "Then I'm sure you can spare me some time tomorrow."

"Uh, y-yea, I guess."

"Cool. I'll wait for you in front of the library tomorrow after class." He says and turns around moving back to his seat, leaving as quickly as he appeared.

You finally release your breath and Seokmin reappears from the restroom. "What did he say? Did he threaten you?"

"He said to kick you in your balls, you loser." You grit your teeth.

-

As he promised, you find Joshua standing in front of the library next day. You take in a deep breath before walking up to him. He doesn't offer you any smile when he sees you. You realise that his playful and flirty nature seemed to have vanished for some reason.

"Hey," you smile awkwardly. He nods in reply, "Why don't we go to the back? It's more quiet there." You swallow and jerk your head yes.

You both walk behind to the library in silence, your steps in sync. He takes a seat on the stairs located at the back entrance of the library and you follow him.

"Are you dating Seokmin?"

Seriously?

You exhale a frustrated sigh, "Did you seriously call me here to talk about that?"

He sighs, "Right. Yeah...I'm sorry, it's none of my business."

"Yes, it isn't Joshua."

Joshua looks at you for a beat, his eyes sad. " I...I wanted to apologize," he whispers, looking down to the ground. "For...the thing I said about Seokmin. I was being an asshole."

You sigh, offering him nothing but silence.

"Also...for running away that day. I was a coward."

"Forget it, it's in the past," you murmur not really wanting to revisit that day.

"I can't," Joshua speaks, his voice hoarse. "You are someone special to me. At least you were. You...make me feel things I've never felt before and I'm scared of that."

You swallow. What is that supposed to mean?

You peek a glance at him to see his face scrunched up in worry, lost in thoughts.

"I-I just...it's really hard...for me-"

"It's okay Joshua, you don't have to talk about it. I understand very well that you don't want a serious relationship and I'm not forcing you to. So don't feel pressured."

"No, I just...I want to apologize-"

"And you did. It's in the past, let's move on." You offer him a soft smile. "Besides I'm sorry too...for throwing water at you,"you smile sheepishly and he smiles softly.

Joshua exhales a deep breath, hands running through his hair. "And...can you not avoid me like plague? I get that we're not together anymore but let's not act like strangers. You can...you know, say hi to me when we meet." He says softly.

"Oh, yea, uhm..sorry about that."

"No it's okay, I understand. I made the situation awkward for us." He smiles sadly.

Your phone vibrates in your pocket and you see it's Seokmin when when you pull out your phone.

Oh shit. You had to go pick up some books in the library with him which you totally forgot about.

"I...I'm sorry but need to get going." You say to Joshua, standing up. A small frown appears on his forehead but he replies, "I see. Okay, I'll...see you around I guess."

"Yea, see you." You reply, quickly walking away to pick up Seokmin's call.

-

"So he didn't threaten to pick your eyeballs out or drown you in the sea, just apologized?" Seokmin asks as both of you walk home from the library. You roll your eyes, "No, he didn't threaten me but he did threaten you."

"Haha very funny. I'm not scared of him."

"Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night." You laugh and he joins you, slightly nudging you with his elbow.

"He seemed different, you know. He looked sad," you whisper. He replies, "Looks like he regrets letting you go."

"Haha."

"I'm serious. I'm pretty sure he likes you, Y/n." Seokmin says, his face serious.

"Yea, whatever...let's just drop the topic," you sigh.

"Don't beat yourself up. Maybe give him some time. If he really, truly feels for you, he's gonna come back, okay? And then you get to make your decision."

"Gee, are you a love expert or what?"

"Oh yes, I am."

"Really? Then why are you single?"

"Coaches don't play, you know."

"Wow, you sound so smart for a dummy."

"Come here so I can whoop your ass you crybaby." Seokmin chases after you as a fit of giggles escape from both of you and the night starts to grow darker and the wind warmer.

Summer is almost here.

A/N: sooo, it'll take me a while to upload the next chapter since it'll probably be the last one~ thank you everyone for liking this series and waiting patiently, it really makes me happy. As always feedbacks are highly appreciated! 💖

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Ocean Eyes - Part 7

When we finally arrived at Sue's house Chris walked with me to the front door... i nearly tripped at one point but luckily he managed to grab my arm and keep me upright! I had whispered a quiet 'thanks' before knocking lightly on her front door. Sue opened the door ushering us inside and leading the way to the living room where i saw Mason curled up on the sofa. He was asleep but he looked white and sweaty, there was a bowl on the floor beside his head incase he was sick again.

"He hasn't been asleep long, i think he wore himself out crying"

"Chris can you get Mason please? I can't carry him like this...."

"Yeah sure, i got him" he quickly moved forward and scooped Mason up into him arms.

"Mama...." Mason moaned looking around for me.

"Im right here baby, your dads gonna carry you out to the car".

"God you weren't kidding bout that fever" Chris added looking down at Mason in concern.

"Im gonna get him home, thanks for watching him Sue"

"Sure thing hon, hope he feels better soon. Here, take the bowl incase he gets sick on the drive home" she smiled passing me the plastic bowl that had been next to Mason.

The drive home i had Mason cradled against me as he slept, the seat belt going around the both of us being as we had no car seat in Chris's car!!

God i felt like a crappy mom tonight!

When we got home i sat with Mason on the sofa and stripped him down to his underwear to try and cool him down.

"Chris could you get me a cold washcloth please, there should be some in the pile of laundry on the table"

"Sure" he rushed off to grab the cloth, Mason was just laying against my chest, whimpering slightly.

"Here you go" Chris passed me the cloth and sat beside us "i got him some water too, he should be drinking plenty of fluids"

"Thanks" i smiled before folding the cloth and laying it over Mason's forehead. He moaned at the coldness but soon settled again clinging onto me, it didn't take long until he was asleep. I sighed in relief and carefully moved forward in my seat so i could lay him down.... i was desperate for the bathroom!! Mason stirred and held on tighter, for such a little thing he had a grip on him.

"Can you try taking him i really need to pee!" I looked at Chris with desperate eyes. He chuckled and managed to pry Mason off of me and into his arms.

While i was in the bathroom i wiped off my make up and tied my hair up before getting changed into my pyjama's.... it was gonna be a long night. Once i was done i headed to the kitchen and made coffee, hopefully it would help sober me up a bit more.

"Ah fuck!" I cursed as i sloshed the coffee onto the floor while making my way back to the living room "i made coffee, you might still have some left if you're lucky"

"Thanks" Chris looked up and smiled, i didn't miss the way he looked me up and down either.

"Does he still feel hot? If his temperature doesn't start to go down soon we'll have to try a lukewarm bath maybe give him some Tylenol...."

"Yeah his still hot, but it doesn't seem to be getting worse"

"This is so unlike him, Mason never gets sick. I can literally count on one hand the amount of times his been sick" i shook my head "i'm so close to freaking out right now you have no idea...."

"Calm down sweetheart, he'll be fine"

"Thank you for staying with us, i probably would've been calling my mom in hysterics if you hadn't been here"

"There's no where else id rather be" he said looking down at Mason lovingly.

"Right.... i should probably text Scott let him know we're home" i got up to grab my phone from my purse and started a text to Scott. We had dropped him at his place on the way to collect Mason.

There was a message from Derek on my phone too which i quickly skimmed, he was saying how much he enjoyed meeting me and wanted to know if i wanted to get dinner with him sometime!! I decided i'd reply to him in the morning and put my phone on the table, Mason was the only thing i could deal with right now.

I applied a fresh cloth to Masons forehead and checked his temperature, slowly but surely it was going down. I sat beside him and Chris on the sofa and sighed in relief.

"Looks like his fever is easing off finally" i said yawning and letting my head fall back against the sofa, we'd been up for hours now keeping watch on Mason.

"Yeah, thank god" Chris mumbled as he carefully tried to move Mason in his arms.

"You want me to take him?"

"No no, i'm good, my arm has fallen asleep is all" he smiled.

"You sure? i don't mind...."

"We're all good".

We sat in silence with the TV on low for some background noise and i couldn't help but look at Chris and how natural he was at being a dad.

"You should get some sleep, you look exhausted" Chris suddenly said interrupting my internal thoughts!

"You trying to tell me i look like shit Chris?" I asked raising my eyebrows at him.

"What?? No!! I didn't mean that..."

"Im fucking with you relax" i chuckled shaking my head.

"You looked beautiful tonight" i heard him say quietly, maybe i wasn't supposed to hear him but i did.

"Its amazing what you can do with some make up and clothes that aren't sweats and t-shirts"

"You look beautiful without make up even wearing your sweats and a t-shirt, i just meant that you looked good. I personally prefer this version of you"

"Haha, now i know your just trying to make me feel better....i'm a mess!"

"Prettiest girl i know" he said giving me that smirk of his.... my god damn weakness!!

"Are you just saying this because you think i'm drunk and wont remember?? Because i'll have you know i have mostly sobered up by this point"

"Im well aware, i just..... never mind. You should try and get some sleep".

I nodded agreeing with him, the conversation was about to turn awkward and i wasn't ready for that!

"Wake me up if Mason needs me...?"

"Of course".

When i woke up again i had somehow ended up cuddled up against Chris! He had his arm around me, my head resting on his chest, Mason still sleeping on his other side. To anyone who saw us and didn't know better we looked like the perfect little family. I felt myself start to panic..... i shouldn't have let myself get this close to him! It was too easy to fall back into that comfortable routine we always had..... but we didn't have that anymore, at least i didn't think we did. I carefully eased away from him making sure he was still sleeping and made a quick exit to the kitchen, he didn't need to know about this!

As i started making some coffee and toast i heard the soft voice of my baby boy. As i stuck my head round the door i saw he was sitting up talking with Chris, he looked so much better this morning thank god.

"Where's mom?" I heard him ask and i stepped into the living room giving him a smile.

"Im right here bud, how you feeling?" I asked as i sat in front of them on the coffee table, i reached over to hold the back of my hand against his forehead "looks like your fever is almost gone"

"Im hungry"

"I bet! But its dry toast for you buddy. You've gotta go easy for a little while.... are you still feeling sick?"

"No, not anymore"

"Okay thats good!".

"Dad are you staying for breakfast?" Mason asked.

"Um...."

"Pleaseeee" Mason begged looking at him with those eyes that were exactly like his dads, Chris looked at me waiting for my say so.

"Its fine with me, if you have time..."

"I do! Yeah of course!" He said quickly nodding his head with a huge smile.

After we had all eaten Chris took Mason for his bath after Mason insisted he go with his dad. While they were gone i sent a text to Scott with an update and saw a missed call from Hannah, i sat at the kitchen table and quickly called her back.

"Hey! Hows Mace?? My mom said you had to come get him last night"

"Yeah it was eventful, he had a fever and was being sick" i sighed "Chris stayed to help out with Mason... i had had so much to drink Han"

"You let him stay..."

"To help with Mason yeah"

"Hmmm of you say so" she laughed

"Shut up, what happened to you last night, huh?? You disappeared with Troy"

"I know, im sorry but did you see him?? I knew you were okay with Scott. So what about you and Derek?? He seemed very interested"

"He was nice" i nodded "he texted me last night but i haven't had a chance to reply yet"

"But your gonna right??"

"Yeah...."

"Y/N text him back!! That man was gorgeous!!"

"I will"

"Don't make me come round there"

"Oh god Han, your so pushy" i laughed.

"Only because i love you"

"I love you too, i gotta go though i'll speak to you later".

When i walked into the living room Mason was sat on the sofa watching cartoons and Chris was gathering his things.

"Your leaving already?"

"Yeah i've got a meeting at 11:00am..."

"Okay, well thanks for last night"

"Sure, anytime" he smiled "hey, i was wondering if next weekend i could take Mason to meet my mom? She's been asking when she can meet him...."

"Um.... yeah sure"

"You can come too if you want? I know my mom would be happy to see you" he said with a smile.

"Okay" i nodded "it'll just be us though right? I don't want Mason getting overwhelmed with too many new people"

"Yeah of course, maybe Scott too if he finds out you know what his like"

"Thats fine" i nodded with a smile knowing exactly what Scott was like.

"Thank you, i should go.... can i come by later though? Id like to check in on Mason"

"Sure, i'm sure he'd like that"

"I'll see you later then" he smiled before heading over to Mason "bye buddy i gotta go to work for a bit but i'll come see you later"

"Okay, bye dad".

Everything taglist: @jesseswartzwelder @dumblani @barnesandrogersworld @patzammit @rynabarnesrogers-reading @rainbowkisses31 @rororo06 @supernaturalwintersoldier

Ocean eyes: @supraveng @michelehansel @melissaglenn5 @denisemarieangelina @mrsjeffwittek @mery-be @marvelfansworld @cmalass @capstopavenger @fallenoutofrose @kelbabyblue @biebsmylife95 @loser-alert @traceyaudette @w3lissax @jennmurawski13 @ford66steal @saiyanprincessswanie @christocrave

[nanasarea]

🇨‌🇦‌🇧‌🇮‌🇳

❆Prompt: your friends asked you to stay with them in a cabin for a bit of a vacation and you obviously cant say no to them

❆Genre: fluff

❆Pairing: reader x best friend!nct (dream focus)

❆Word count: 2.6k (ok longest fic I see you)

❆a/n: this was so fun to write and now I'm crying I want this also I might make a summer edition once it gets hotter bc I have IDEAS now

ALSO NOT PROOFREAD

❆Tag list: @bumblebeenct​ @socketpunch​

❆TW: toy gun (?), German, swearing (?) idk not much haha

“Get in, loser, we’re going out of our minds!” Donghyuck yelled from the bus. 

You had agreed to spend the weekend with your friends at a cabin in the woods. 

They all got some time off and wanted to spend some time throwing snow balls at each other and building snowmen, but they couldn't do that without you. 

It was Friday, the day of departure. You had just gotten a text to come outside from Jeno a few minutes ago and there you were, staring at the big bus with 23 grown men, which would otherwise be terrifying, but since it was them, it seemed fun, and only a tiny bit terrifying. 

“Haven't you already?” You yelled back as you walked towards the bus and saw Johnny step out of the bus to help you with your bags and before you could say that you got it, they were already put away on the bus. 

“Thanks.” You smiled at him, your neck slightly hurting from the angle you had to put it in, in order to look at him.

“Don't mention it. Or do, if you must.” He said dramatically and gestured for you to get on the bus before him. You stepped into the bus and Johnny soon followed. 

Immediately, you were greeted by Doyoung, who was sitting at the front with Taeyong, who asked you about how you were and if you slept well.

You quickly greeted back and told them you were great and that you couldn't sleep that well, because you were excited. Before you could ask them the same, YangYang yelled for you to come over to the back as Hyuck pulled you after him. 

You tried to greet as many people as you could before getting to the back, where Yangyang sat with Renjun, Haechan and Hendery. Hyuck quickly sat down on the far left, right next to Renjun. 

Next to Renjun was a free seat, and next to that one Yangyang, with Hendery at the far right. Renjun and Yangyang both patted at the seat and smiled at you, waiting for you to sit between them.

“I’m guessing my plan of a quiet ride was doomed from the start.” You dramatically sighed as you sat down between the two. 

“That was never an option and you know it.” Hyuck laughed, causing all 5 of you to chuckle.

You spent a good 40 minutes talking to Yangyang and Hendery as Renjun and Hyuck debated about something next to you, before you made the first stop. 

“About 10 minutes and then if you're not back on the bus, we shall leave without you, except for you, Jisung, we love you and would never leave you.” Johnny said before the group chuckled as Jisung got embarrassed.

You swear you could hear Chenle’s “of course we would, we have terrible memory.” and Jisung sighing before Renjun dragged you off the bus. 

You got off the bus and were met with Jaemin, who looked like he was about to kill someone, and Jeno, who looked he was trying his best for Jaemin not to give in. 

“Good morning.” You said “Whats so good about it?” Jaemin sighed, leaning against the bus and throwing his head back. 

You looked over at Jeno and tried to contain your laugh, to which he only mouthed “No coffee yet”. You nodded, chuckling a bit before following Shotaro, Hendery and Kun, who went to go get coffee for everyone. 

You barely got your own cup into your hands before you were pulled away from the three and into the store.

“Yn, come with me, I need it.” Hyuck said. “Need what?” You asked, following close behind. 

He didn't comment, he just dragged you to the toy section and showed you the toy gun. 

“You need a toy gun?” You asked “Yes.” He sassed “Its so pretty.” He explained “And it has fake bullets!” He added, excitedly. 

“Very nice, Hyuck. Here’s a deal, I’ll buy you the extra bullets if you promise not to use the gun on me.” You said, knowing very well that you need to make a deal beforehand.

“Deal.” He smiled, shaking your hand. 

Once you finished at the check out, you saw Jaemin pinching Jisung’s cheeks while Chenle and Jeno had their heads in their hands, they weren't surprised, but still a tad disappointed. 

“How many coffees did I miss?” You asked, causing Jeno to chuckle before returning to his disappointment. 

You stood outside of the bus for a while, talking to Chenle about his dog, well, him talking and showing you photos of Daegal while you listened and admired.

“Can I be her godparent?” You asked, placing a hand on his shoulder as Xiaojun’s head turned to you. “Godly parent?” He asked.

“God parent, but while we’re on the topic-” “DONT GET HIM STARTED, IM SITTING NEXT TO HIM AND I WANT TO SLEEP.” Kun cut you off.

“Haha, old man.” Lucas laughed before Kun looked at him and sighed. “I didn't sign up for this, I just wanted to sing.” He sighed. “You love us and you know it!” Yangyang teased. 

After a minute, you returned back to your seat and watched as Hyuck put the bullets into the gun already. 

You pulled out your phone and put in your headphones, before Renjun came up to you and took them away from you and put them in his pocket. 

“Hey!” you protested. “Wait a bit.” He said, laughing and sitting next to you.

“Now, is everyone awake?” Johnny asked, standing up once again. “Yes!” The whole bus yelled.

“What?” he asked, placing his hand behind his ear. “Ay, Ay, captain!” 

“I can't hear you!” 

“Ay, ay, captain!”

“Ohhhh, who wants the aux first?” 

A couple hands got raised, but Johnny sighed and said “If no one wants it, I guess ill be first.” and put on the first song, which was SHINee’s Lucifer, which made the whole bus jam out.

The songs kept going and your ears were in heaven, there were 23 professional singers singing some of your favourite songs, of course they were, but after a while, the atmosphere calmed down and you continued talking to Renjun.

You remember seeing most of WayV, Shotaro and Jungwoo playing a game, Taeyong play on his Nintendo while Doyoung watched and critiqued, Johnny and Taeil making Mark and Ten laugh every 3 seconds as Jaehyun and Yuta discussed something.

After some time, Jeno, Jaemin, Chenle and Jisung changed seats so they were right in front of you, which resulted in you playing some games.

An hour later, you got to your destination. You watched as Jaehyun, Jeno, Lucas, Jaemin and Johnny bring the bags and the suitcases from the bus as  Kun, Taeyong and Doyoung went to go get the keys while you and the others stood before your cabins. 

Once the suitcases were out and distributed, you waited for the keys. Most of Wayv and Shotaro was standing on the porch and discussing something, half of 127 was cuddled up while the other half took photos, alongside Sungchan.

You and the dreamies and Yangyang however, were playing with the snow. Hyuck pulled out his fake gun and jokingly started pointing it at the others. He jokingly shot us, one by one and we all played along, expect for Chenle, because he couldn't bother to move.

First, it was Jaemin, then Yangyang, Jeno, you, Jisung and at the end, Renjun, who just so happen to be near a hill so you all watched in shock as he rolled down it, getting covered in snow as Jeno and Jaemin went to go get him. 

Taeyong walked over to you guys to give you the keys before he saw Renjun, who resembled a snowman and Jeno and Jaemin helping said snowman. 

“Renjun, you okay?” He asked as Chenle, Hyuck and Yangyang laughed their asses off. Renjun just showed a thumbs up as they made their way up the hill again.

You thanked Taeyong for the keys as he and Hyuck made their way to the 127′s cabin and Yangyang to WayV’s. 

You walked to the cabin and went in, leaving your bags at the door. Jeno started the fire in the fireplace as Jisung and Chenle browsed the cabin while you and Jaemin asked Renjun if he wants cuddles to warm him up.

“Normally, I would say no, but I'm really cold, so I shall allow it.” he said before you and Jaemin looked at each other and cuddled the melted snowman. 

After cuddling for a bit, Jeno suggested deciding roommates, so once Chenle and Jisung got back, they reported on the rooms and you used a random pair up generator, since none of you had any preference.

Jeno and Chenle got the ground floor room, which was closest to the kitchen. Jaemin and Jisung got the room one level up, which had the best bathroom and you and Renjun got the top floor room, which had the best view. 

“You guys hungry?” Chenle asked, to which everyone nodded. “I’ll call Doyoung and ask if they know what they're going to eat.” Jeno said, picking up his phone. 

“I’ll take the bags to our room.” Jaemin said, taking his and Jisung’s stuff and walking up the stairs. 

“I’ll do the same.” Renjun said as Chenle and Jeno looked at each other before Chenle sighed. “I guess I shall too.”

Now, you and Jisung were watching Jeno as he called Doyoung. Apparently, there was a take out place not so far away, which did deliveries so they decided on that. 

Once the others got back, you told them and you made your way to the biggest cabin, which was 127′s. The others also came to the cabin and half an hour of everyone on their phone, the food had arrived. 

Taeyong suggested they used his new projector to watch something, so you did. You all gathered on the big couch and floor as the movie started playing on the wall while you ate.

Two movies later, Kun suggested going outside to make snowmen, while Yangyang suggested a snow ball fight, so you did both.

You started building the snowmen with Taeil and Winwin, but once you felt a snow ball hit your back, you said fuck it and joined the fight. 

You got a few throws in before you all got really cold and went back inside for some hot chocolate. 

Xiaojun, Kun, Taeyong, Doyoung, Jaemin and Jeno went to the nearby store to buy what you needed for breakfast while the others stayed in the big cabin and played a few games before Renjun got mad at Jisung’s team beating him.

“Jisung, meet me on the rooftop.” Renjun commented, making everyone laugh. 

You ended up talking to Chenle about something, but you forgot the Korean word for it, and the English word for it, you could only remember the word in German, only because you remember Yangyang teaching it to you a while back.

“Yangyang!” You yelled, grabbing Chenle’s hand and walked over to Yangyang. “Yes?” He asked.

“How do you say schwert in Korean?” You asked. “You mean sword?” Yangyang asked, which made you mentally slap yourself for not remembering. 

“What about in Korean?” Chenle asked, causing silence from the both of you until you both yelled “Mark!” and so, you, Chenle and Yangyang walked over to him.

“Yes?” He asked. “How do you say sword in Korean?” Yangyang asked, to which Mark just stared at all of you.

“Johnny!” Mark yelled as so, you, Chenle, Yangyang and Mark now walked towards Johnny asked him the same question.

“Yeah?” He asked, turning around to face you all. “How do you say sword in Korean?” Mark asked.

Johnny just looked at you all before pulling out his phone and googling google translate. “검 (Geom).” he said, showing you the translation. 

“We’re idiots, aren't we?” You asked. “Yup.” “Totally.” “The dumbest.”

“Wait, how do you say it in Chinese...” Chenle wondered before yelling “Renjun!”

It was getting late, so you said your goodbyes to the others and went back to your cabins, where Jaemin insisted on making you all dinner, so while he made dinner, you sat down on the couch and turned the tv on and searched fort the new buzzed unsolved episode on the YouTube section. 

“You started it without me?” Renjun asked, sitting right next to you. “I was searching.” You defended as Chenle sat down on the floor and waited for you to hit play.

As Jeno helped Jaemin, the rest of you watched the episode, you and Renjun on the couch, his legs lightly tossed over your lap as he leaned against the arm of the couch while Chenle sat right below you on the floor and Jisung next to him. 

“Dumbass.” Renjun commented. “You would do the same.” You said, laughing. “I would not!” he yelled. “You would.” Chenle and Jisung said in unison, making Renjun huff and continue watching in silence as you pet his head, jokingly. 

By the end of the episode, Renjun had turned so that his head was in your lap and his legs were on the arm of the chair as you played his hair and Chenle and Jisung were lazily spread out on the floor.

“Kids, dinner’s ready!” Jeno yelled, causing the two on the floor to groan and slowly get up. “You heard your dad, go.” you teased the two as Renjun got up and held his hand up to help you up.

You got to the kitchen and sat down, eating the food that Jaemin and Jeno prepared in silence.

On the ground floor, Jeno and Chenle tossed and turned, not being able to find a good position until Jeno said fuck it and got up. 

“Jaemin is probably cuddling with Jisung so they have a spare bed, so....se ya!” he said, holding up a peace sign before walking out the door. 

Once he got there, he opened the door to see Jaemin with all of his limbs wrapped around Jisung and thanked god before walking to the other bed and fell asleep.

Back on the ground floor, Chenle tried to sleep again but couldn't, so he said to himself “If Yn and Renjun are sleeping right now, I swear to god.” before getting up and walking to your room. 

He opened the door, and there you were, lying on the floor as a Taylor Swift song played. “What ya doing?” he asked.

“We’re talking about alien li-” “Nerds.” Chenle cut Renjun off before entering the room and lying next to you. 

“So, what exactly were you saying?” Chenle asked, turning his head to face you.

“How aliens could be monitoring us right now.” You said, turning your head to face him.

“But why? You two are so boring, what's there to see?” He said, making Renjun get up and tell you to hold him back, which you did. 

“You're just mad at the truth!” Chenle yelled, propping himself up as he laughed. 

Renjun started laughing too, and so did you, which ended up with all of you back on the floor, laughing, before one of you changed the subject back onto alien life and next thing you know, Jeno was at your door to tell you that its time for breakfast.

Once you finished breakfast, you ended up taking your sketchbook out, and so did Renjun. You spent the whole morning and a bit of the afternoon drawing and doodling with Renjun as Chenle and Jeno played games while Jaemin and Jisung were on their phones.

You looked up from your paper and saw them all having fun and relaxed in your chair.

“There truly is no place like home.” 

[waokevale]

Porcelain Face - Chapter 3

WARNING: Sexual Harrassment

Bullying, F-Girls....

(At least brain-bleatching, not detailed, no touching. Just cringy words)

Two weeks later Logan was about to walk past the corner when he noticed Virgil with a bunch of the "dressed up" girls.

He hid himself quickly inspecting the scene before further investigation.

The girls were all laughing at the poor cardboard boy and pulling by his hair and clothes.

Some of them called him names like:

-"Stupid fag" or "freak" 

All of these were very rude and unacceptable.

He pulled out his phone real quick and recorded the rest of the scene.

He wasn't planning on showing it to the principal yet.

The girls had to pay a bigger price than just detention or calling their parents.

It was clear it wasn't something rare to happen to Virgil from his poor state.

Logan started to form a plan until he heard the girls talking about him and he froze.

Maybe that's another way to get rid of them?

-"Hey Jess, what do you think about the new hot teacher?"

Said one of the girls which made usually emotionless Logan cringe on the inside with only the thought.

-"Same as you Diana. I bet I could smash him till Monday comes, Miller passed, Jenkins passed, so how could this be harder? Just look at me, he won't resist it when I pull out my lipstick."

Now Logan was sick. What the hell was wrong with these girls?! Having affairs with their teachers?! Clearly not seeing the fact that he was gay.

 Now they NEEDED to be thrown out.

Logan already had experience with it, since he didn't really care about people much do to his emotionless state.

 He got rid of some students in his high school easily for yet unknown reasons.

Now was the time to return to the old bad habits...He thought.

But this was worth it.

This boy needed to be at least a little bit happier.

Logan knew that there were a lot more bullies but he had easily spotted the "real" bullies.

Some had pretty bad issues from what he could see, some were doing this because of a bribe and the other ones....they did it for fun, they had no issues at all, these were the ones that deserved it the most. The sadistic people.

The girls belonged to the last type of bullies.

They clearly made him sick.

He had evidence now, but he had to set up something greater.

'So Jessica says she wants to "smash me"? I wonder how does she even do that.... She probably tells the teacher to meet him in some class after school from what I've heard.

He started thinking of a new plan this time, but in  that moment Diana and Jessica had started talking about where and when is Jessica going to meet him at.

It was all in whispers, but Logan had "good ears." Class 24, 3.20 PM 

-"So be it" Logan said to himself.

He had just the perfect equipment prepared for things like that.

Later on Jessica asked Logan to meet him in the same exact place  and time she mentioned before.

He agreed obviously...

For a reason.

When the clock had finally shown 3.20 PM, Logan was already in the class, waiting.

When Jessica came into the classroom he honestly wanted to puke. She looked like a hoe bag or some sort of prostitute, he would've described it if it wasn't so....disturbing and slutty.

-"May I ask you, what on earth are you wearing, Jessica?" - Logan said with an annoyed look.

-"Awww, come on Mr.Berry you know you like it~"

Stay calm Logan... He said to himself

 it usually was easy, probably becuase he didn't have to deal with girls like this all the time.

Then he reminded himself of the plan. 

Act and ask the questions.

-"I'm not sure, Jessica. What are you even trying to do...?" He obviously was waiting for the cringiest answer

-"You~" - She said in a lustful voice

-"Wait a minute. Would you mind answering my questions first? Because I have three."

She signed with a bored expression and replied: -"ugh...Fine. Shoot."

-"Am I the first one that you're willing to....ugh...you know...?" He stuttered a bit but it was clear that she knew what he meant.

-"Depends, do you want it to be?"

She smirked.

-"Answer, honestly. Please? "

-"Nope you're not the first one, I've fucked Miller, Jenkins and even that one substitute teacher....what was his...Oh! Yeah, Rayens and a bunch of other high school guys, if that's what you wanted to hear."

First one, check. Logan thought.

-"Ummm....May I ask about your honest opinion about one certain student? I won't get mad as long as you answer honestly."

-"Kay'..Which one is it?" She asked.

-"Virgil, the cardboard boy."

-"Pffffff...Haha! That loser? I think he's a useless fag honestly. And- uhhh...Sorry teach' for swearing I guess...?"

-Mhm" Logan nodded.

As he thought, a horrible person, really.

-"Jess? May I ask you that third question and get this over with."

-"Sure~ I thought the same." She replied.

-"What the hell did you have had in your mind to even think of such a pathetic way!? People are not dolls, why do you "score them" ?

-"Just because your wifey says so, doesn't mean I can't play."

-"First of, I don't have a wife and i'm not willing to have one"

"Ohhh, So you're si-" 

-"Please just shut up.

I will never have an affair with you, young miss.

You are definitely too young for my liking and I'm not foolish enough for this.

Second, I'm really sorry you haven't noticed yet but I do not feel attraction to women."

-"W-wha-?!"

-"In other words, yes I'm one of these "stupid fags" that you've been calling homosexual people."

-"UGH!? WHY DID I EVEN WASTED MY TIME WITH YOU!? YOU'LL SEE THEY WILL FIRE YOU FOR THAT, HAH! THEY'LL BELIEVE ME THAT YOU'RE MOLESTING ONE OF YOUR STUDENTS AND YOU'LL GO ON COURT, HAHA!" She yelled.

-"If I could I would laugh in that moment, you are clearly missing something. Nothing of what you have just said will become true, because the principal has already heard about this."

-"W-what are you talking about?! You must be joking! Hahaha! Very funny." the girl laughed nervously.

The door suddenly swung open as the very angry principal has came into the room.

-"YOUNG LADY, MIND EXPLAINING ME WHAT WERE YOU TRYING TO DO?!"

-"N-Nothing! I swear! He tried to molest me and forced me to wear these clothes!" She faked crying but no one could believe her.

-"I don't think I would be able to, you know? Since well, I've already told you I'm homosexual."

-"Quit the act, Miss Willow. You've violated the most important rules in this school and ruined it's reputation. I'm very sorry, but I'll have to kick you out and apparently a bunch of your friends, including some teachers as well..."

-"W-what?! No! No! My parents won't let you- they won't believe you!"

-"I have enough evidence that I think they will, Jessica." Logan said plainly showing her the videos.

-"NO-"

-"Check-mate."

Before the "act" Logan had set up a microphone and a small camera that was hidden in one of the paintings like in the thriller movies.

That was the the fall of one of the most popular girls and the worst bullies of their Academy High. 

Logan had her in his little finger. 

It was as simple as a chess game.

She was really naive, huh? She thought everyone was going to serve her and that was her Achilles's foot.

-"Pssst what happened to Jess and a bunch of other people??" - One kid asked in whisper.

-"I heard that someone has recorded her while trying to seduce one of the teachers, he somehow made her  reveal her dark secrets and she got caught and kicked out!" Someone else replied.

-"That's good that she and her squad are gone. I hated them anyways." - Roman said simply.

-"Yeah, she sucked. She was a total slut." Remus added with a squimish expression at the uncomfortable thought..

Logan saw as everyone reacted to Jessica's and her friends fall as he turned to the twins.

He thought:

'Such mean words, yet such fragile hearts,       

I wonder when they'll finally drop they act...'

[colour-outside-the-liness]

Hey, I'm doing good too. Just normal amounts of stressful stuff right now. Just moved to a country I've never been to before but can't complain, things are not as hard as the last time I did this so. Thanks for asking! Yeah, I saw you posting about some pretty scary health issues before, I'm glad you came out of that alive and hope you're healthier now!

The nerve some people have! Haha I know I would be pissed if people were questioning my intelligence like that especially after a couple of drinks in haha. Though I do like taunting people when I play group games, I'll be like "don't need to try that hard guys, you're gonna lose anyway" just to mess with them or just call people sore losers if they accuse me of cheating haha (they're probably right on the accusations tho). People get real mad sometimes it's kinda funny. 😂

Omg literally laughed out loud reading this! Hahaha, how did you manage to fall over a road sign then end up in a ditch? lol omg hope you didn't get hurt too bad 😂 I was trying to downplay my drunken escapades but since you shared yours I should tell you my worst one:

I was at this summer street party at night and got drunk on something made out of tropical herbs and cachaça (which is about 48% alcohol), drank 3 and a half bottles of that like it was apple juice, made friends with a bunch of strangers in a bathroom queue (who tried to talk to me weeks later but I had no idea who they were), had to be held by my best friend while I peed (mostly missing the toilet), fell in the middle of the street and scraped my knee, threatened this boy who was helping me walk and told him not to try anything funny or I would beat him up, then dragged my friends to the beach and left them shortly after to go make out with my ex, came back with lipstick all over my mouth and chin and when my friends asked what I was doing I said I was just talking to my ex and they were like NO YOU WERE NOT, hahaha then I kissed all my girl friends on a dare and we danced under the full moon, then I told my best friend I had to puke so she took me to the ocean but I changed my mind and happened to step on a dead turtle on the way back and started crying bc of it, but last month my best friend told me it was a rock I had stepped on (I believed it was a dead turtle for 7 years!). Had the worst hangover of my life the next day. ✌️✨

Ah I'm happy you liked it! I've never listened to Six musical before but it sounds fun! I can see why you like it haha made me want to dance around my apartment 💃. And hey if liking musicals is your thing then it's great, I'm sure Hozier will understand if he's not your top artist of the year. 😋 Here's my "damie" Pinterest board if you or anyone else wants to check it out, totally recommend making one if you're a visual person like me!

https://pin.it/UcHVlkq

Oh I could talk about Dani and Jamie forever I think. I love the beast in the jungle speech too and it's so painful to watch, VP delivered that beautifully, but I have to admit I'm always a crying mess from episode 1 when older Jamie starts reciting that song about being sad while waiting for her lover to return, this show is fucking cruel I hate it and love it at the same time hahaha. Omg your mom 😂 but I mean it's truly an honor to be compared to someone like Dani, no? She's really great even if she needs a little help haha (don't we all).

Aaah you're amazing! Thank you so much, I'll read this pirate AU soon!

I used to draw a lot, really loved doing it when I was a kid as I said before, and all throughout adulthood too but I haven't done that in almost a year now bc I've got a bit of a case of burnout I guess, it just takes a lot of effort to do it when it shouldn't be like that at all. I used to do fanart too, for other fandoms. Even made one for Dani x Jamie but ended up not liking how it turned out haha. I've got a lot of respect for writers and fanfic writers also! Yall can make words make sense in really interesting and beautiful ways, build worlds so enthralling I can see them vividly in my head. Writing is such an incredibly fascinating skill to have! And I guess the most important thing is that we enjoy doing these things right? Even if we think we're not particularly good at it.

Anyway, have a lovely weekend! 👋✨

Good I'm glad you're doing great but sorry you're dealing with stressful stuff!! Hope living in a new country goes well for you I'm so jealous that you've lived in different countries I'd love to live somewhere else even if just for s few years!! Awwh thank you so much I definitely came out of it alive and am feeling so much better now thank you I mean I do some pretty ditzy things so when people say it to me it's pretty deserved sometimes, I'm secretly smart and people just don't expect it so I never mind too much haha I might have to start saying the things that you do and just taunting them over it I mean, I usually do win even when they make me answer different questions so I will definitely have to start saying things like that to them Haha I love that you're just like "yeah they're probably right in their accusations" I agree seeing how mad some people get over games and stuff is funny (it's me I'm people I hate loosing games depending on what it is and I am very competitive) So it was very dark and all we had for light was my roommates flashlight on her phone but while we were walking home a friend of ours that lived else where kept texting her to make sure we were still safe (my phone as dead at this point) so while she was texting him her flashlight was facing down and someone had moved this road sign to the footpath and it was on that sits on the floor so while I couldn't see it I walked into it and fell over it but while I feel I grabbed hold of it and flipped with it and fell in a ditch with it on top of me... I was fine and was just laid laughing while my friend looked down at me and in the most northern accent ever just said "get up you dickhead." and helped me off of the floor and then asked if I was okay... and I was so it was all good!! Haha 😂 I love this drunken story that sounds like one hell of a night and is a roller coaster from start to finish!! I'm sorry you thought you had stood on a dead turtle for 7 years though, someone really should've told you that it was just a rock!! But that sounds like my kind of night!! I love nights like that... stories that will last a life time... the only down side is the hangover... luckily I have only ever had one hang over in my life and it wasn't the morning after the road sign fiasco... I felt surprisingly good the morning after that haha 😂 It's such a good musical it's about Henry VIII wives and I just love everything to do with his wives and that musical is so much fun and actually gives a little insight to the lives the six Tudor queens had away from Henry and with him because at school we're mainly just taught about him which sucks!! I loved the Hozier song and am definitely gonna have to listen to more of his stuff!! I love musicals so much I mainly listen to musical soundtracks at the minute- usually, Legally Blonde and Six on repeat haha 😂 Ooo thank you I will definitely check out this Pinterest board thanks for sending it to me!! I could talk about them forever too... since watching Bly Manor my niece has been asking me so many questions about it and I am more than happy to talk to her about it haha!! The beast in the jungle speech just breaks my heart every time I relate to it so much and VP just delivers it so beautifully!! Oh yeah now I know at the beginning that it's older Jamie I am just a wreck the whole show is just so beautiful and heart breaking at the same time I LOVE IT!! Even though it makes me sob- I keep putting myself through it!! I mean, yeah I was happy that she said it Dani is great but it was the way she said it... my mum can be something else sometimes... she said she thought Dani was like me the first time she does the accent when she says "I've fallen quite in love with London" because I just randomly do accents a lot too but it was the way she was like "She needs help... but I like her she reminds me of you" I was just like... "Should I go get help?" I still don't know the answer to my question about if I need help or not but I mean I probably do need it You're welcome I really hope you like it!! It's a

great fic I love it!! Yeah I get that if stuff starts taking too much effort and burns you out you're not gonna wanna keep doing it so it's understandable that you stopped!! I think fan art is great and I really would love to be able to do it myself but I just don't have the skill it takes!! Awwh it's a shame you didn't like the Dani x Jamie one you did I would've loved to have seen it!! Honestly there are so many talented writers out there and when I read their fics I am just in awe of the worlds they have built and the stories they have created we are so blessed in this fandom to have so many amazing writers and so many amazing fics out there Oh yeah definitely its important to enjoy what you do!! I know I love writing and love writing fics for Dani and Jamie so I think I'll be doing it for a while even if I'm not great at it haha Awwh thank you very much I hope you have a great weekend too!! ☺️

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: Ready for 💔 💔 💔? Jimmy: didn't bring a 🎻 in but there'll probably be a 🌧 about in a bit so go on Janis: Clearly you didn't watch enough back to school hauls to adequately prepare yourself Janis: 🙄🙄 Janis: you'll never guess who found her way to the 'how to catch a man' side of youtube though Jimmy: if it's Helena I really am fucking gutted Janis: Unlikely Janis: less she starts making a big deal out of how her MASSIVE TITS are slowly crippling her Janis: 🐰 has gone full 🐰🥘🥣 Jimmy: what the fuck kind of emojis are them? Janis: it's not my fault there's not a decent pot! Janis: also pretend to be gutted or she will be Jimmy: [draws her a lil pot emoji obvs] Jimmy: Who's pretending? 😭😭😭 Jimmy: have to console thinking about Helena's MASSIVE tits Janis: 👏 dead convincing there Janis: like 💀👑 trying to talk her out of it 'cos she's FUMING Jimmy: should've asked me to do the job for her Janis: check your DMs I'm sure she has Jimmy: [sends her some of the hilarious random DMs he has been sent lately like a highlight reel] Janis: the 💦💦 is endless Janis: you're SUCH old 🗞s Jimmy: 👴💔 Janis: at least you don't have to waste a load of 💸 on tat for her in a months time Janis: which is the only reason she's decided to get in a VERY committed relationship with a 13-year-old in the year below Jimmy: Tah for the reminder to crack on with this fake break up before then Jimmy: good job our kid's young as he is or I'd have to 🔐 Janis: I'm the one doing the breaking up, remember that first Janis: seriously though Janis: doing my head in Janis: get yourself 💐🍫 if you're this arsed gals Jimmy: 💰 on loads of 'em doing that Jimmy: should probably set up that 💌 bollocks you were on about before Janis: boys handwriting would be invaluable to 'em Janis: can't stop dotting their ❓ with ❤ Jimmy: can write with both hands an' all so it won't even be knackering Janis: show-off Jimmy: 💪🏆🥇 Janis: just leave your shit chat up lines like that out Janis: dead giveaway Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: I know what I'm doing Jimmy: just gotta decide who I wanna send ones that ain't been paid for to for the #drama Jimmy: and whose name I wanna 🖋 Janis: [list of the 'loved up' couples of the moment that ain't them] Janis: stick whoever you wanna see get smacked on there Janis: easy Jimmy: this school have a postbox for it or what? Janis: yeah Janis: any excuse to be cringe Jimmy: I'll make sure yours is MASSIVE, don't worry and a top work of 🎨 OBVS Jimmy: 😘 Janis: my biggest concern, OBVS Janis: if you're still here I can do it the day of for all the 💔 points for you Jimmy: we're all 🤞 Lucas'll get on the roof 💐🍫😍 and fall off but you might have to put up with ✨ pissing out all over you when you open a card from me and nowt else Jimmy: that's your 💔 Janis: looking for broken 🦴s Janis: disappointing but not surprising Jimmy: UGH fine, I'll get on the roof Janis: bet we can Jimmy: let's go then Janis: now? Jimmy: you got owt else on? Janis: obviously not Jimmy: so come on Janis: be easiest to get up there from outside the music room Janis: do you know where that is? Jimmy: direct me Janis: [do that] Janis: wait for me if you get there first Janis: sir is insisting I can't go piss because someone else just did, as if our bladders are connected Jimmy: can't do that to lasses hasn't he heard Jimmy: tell him you're about to 💀💀💀 of toxic shock Janis: sadly raging at him over my blob gives off big angry lesbian vibes Janis: and I don't actually have a bloody tampon to throw at him Janis: I'll just leave in a sec but he's being a twat Jimmy: have to be the fake pregnancy fall back AGAIN Janis: one up Asia's news a bit Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: how long ago were the PE cupboard 💕? Janis: I haven't got a diary Jimmy: 😱😱 It weren't the best day of your life! 😱😱 Janis: best OF the day, how about that? Jimmy: bit rude of Asia to nick your phone Jimmy: I get that she don't want her big day ruined but Janis: 😏 Janis: like she's suddenly a top codebreaker Jimmy: #plottwist Janis: 🤓🤓💕 you 2 Jimmy: you 2 more like Jimmy: her being a dickhead means she likes you, DUH Jimmy: must be what the phone nicking were really about Janis: plottwist, they're all massive gays Jimmy: they're going on about sleepovers whenever I open the group chat Janis: you're that cliche? Janis: 👌 Jimmy: just saying it won't be a massive plot twist Janis: in your dreams, dickhead Jimmy: *nightmares Janis: 👻 do I hear someone protesting? Jimmy: Bill's lurking about loads when I get fuck all 😴 he knows I ain't pissing about wasting what dreams I do have Janis: Nice of him to entertain you Jimmy: you've seen my other offers Jimmy: didn't fancy none of them Janis: Fair Janis: he's got some witty bants at least Jimmy: he does alright Janis: better than the alternatives Janis: if I had a sleeping pill hookup, I'd take 'em myself Jimmy: you wanna watch out on that roof, mate, dunno how he'll feel about such a backhanded compliment Jimmy: steady on, bit rude to all the 🐑 hanging about for you to count, that Jimmy: how many #haters you want? Janis: you can pretend you pushed me if you're worried Jimmy: I 💭 that were the point of going up there Jimmy: no need to pretend owt Jimmy: we'll both be 💀💀💀 Janis: alright Janis: [show up] Jimmy: ['bit awkward if you've found a will to live' said like a saucy challenge] Janis: [just a look like does it look like I have? as much of a challenge as we try to find the way up onto the roof 'cos you know it's not that well hidden or secured] Jimmy: [a LOOK because always but we're also helping not just making intense eye contact forever lol] Janis: [remembering our sims school there was multiple levels so maybe you can get on the second story roof if not the third, anyway, letting you 'cos we can, even if you've got to do some lowkey parkour here, help each other and don't die] Jimmy: [it's a mood so we must, I hope your ribs are a bit more healed boy, don't do yourself further injury please] Janis: [rest when you're up there and we're just LOOKing at you like what now] Jimmy: [lighting up 🚬 for you both and doing heart shaped smoke rings because we're on a vday theme which you can totally show her how to do for some #content while you're up there] Janis: [can only imagine the funny face you're gonna have to pull to achieve that which thank god or it'd be too hot already] Jimmy: [all I can think about is when Liam and Edie were on the roof of that house they were staying in and he said he loved her so RIP me and them] Janis: [oh yes I remember that, soz we killed you guys] Jimmy: [anyway give her whatever doodle you've done today as well so she can have it in person cos I like to think you've not seen each other yet] Janis: [always love that, so much that we have to walk away and be peering over the edge dangerously just to diffuse that situation] Jimmy: [jimothy will probably pee over the edge just cos he can haha] Janis: [boy perks] Jimmy: [and they were talking about going for a piss and stuff like that always makes you want to] Janis: [you can't girl we're not falling off forreal, so hold it and contend with finding shit to throw onto the next roof down] Jimmy: [likewise join in with throwing stuff until there's nothing left and you can take your turn to LOOK at her like what now] Janis: [sharing that intense eye-contact for forever like] Jimmy: [we're not breaking it but we are pulling her closer to us] Janis: [writing 'morning' somewhere on his arm, whether we have to pull up his blazer or whatever to do that, we is] Jimmy: [writes 'good' on her in the same place because it is a good morning now we've seen the bae] Janis: [✔ like same] Jimmy: [teach her how to sign it because why not] Janis: ['we get it, you're good with your hands' 'cos mentioning being ambidexterous earlier and we KNOW so] Jimmy: [😏 and kiss her like excuse you I'm good at this too] Janis: [no room or energy to disagree here hen] Jimmy: [nobody's likely to appear and interrupt you up here lads so just enjoy that alone time] Janis: [we know we're gonna, even though it's January and this is scandalous because duh, how can we not] Jimmy: [you have done and will do way worse so] Janis: [should post those unfy smoking roof pics as we're getting down though so everyone knows you were up there but teachers can't actually prove that you were so] Jimmy: [if the teachers are checking your socials they'll get arrested hens] Janis: [easy mr lucas] Jimmy: [but yeah everyone will be well jel, blatantly gonna be a new thing for everyone to try and go to the roof now] Janis: [have fun getting caught losers lool] Jimmy: [not soz you'll never be JJ and living in a rom com] Janis: 😈 Jimmy: 😇🏹💕 Janis: You got the little nappy outfit ready to go, yeah? Jimmy: #kinkunlocked I get it Janis: 'course Janis: what girl wouldn't be 😍 Jimmy: 💀👑 probably prefers wearing them, THANK GOD she's not my target audience Janis: did she ever fake that she was 😍 over you? Jimmy: and have to put owt in the tip jar? Jimmy: SO funny, you Janis: cheek when she's allegedly the most minted Janis: making Asia make it rain 💦💸 Janis: mad she really don't fancy anyone who's not 50% of her though Jimmy: that'll be how she stays 💰💰💰 Janis: keep it in the family? Janis: 👍 Janis: bit extreme but Jimmy: if it were her only reason Jimmy: but she's OBVS 😍😍🤤 an' all Janis: 🤮 Jimmy: she in your lesson? Janis: Yeah Janis: and #2 Jimmy: What do you wanna do that'll do their heads in? Janis: 💡❓ Janis: all they keep talking about is Asia and her new boyfriend Janis: how do we pull focus from how un-goals that is when we're always 💯 Jimmy: could just break them up Janis: I'm not fucking a 13-year-old and I don't think it's a good look for you either Jimmy: never said we had to do owt with him but get in his head Jimmy: not like it'd be hard to convince the lad she's being a massive slag Janis: true, true Janis: she's only gone with him 'cos she knows he ain't gonna dump her because older girl clout Janis: and she wants the 🎁🎁 Janis: well rude Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: the school therapist'll be after him when Asia's done if Lucas ain't Janis: honestly Janis: only the right thing to do Jimmy: [edits some of the many Mia cheating pics they have to look like it could be Asia but in a pisstakey way because we're literally in class so we can't do it properly but like in a is this worth doing way] Janis: 😂😂😂 Janis: that's nightmare fuel, for sure Janis: no wonder you ain't sleeping Jimmy: sleep paralysis demon, her Janis: terrifying, poor boy Janis: but she's got way too many pounds on 💀👑 for that to work Janis: 🤔 what if there was somewhere else he'd rather be Janis: no matter how 🔥 she reckons her 🍑 is Jimmy: not gonna get my sister with him now he's been anywhere near her Janis: Not exactly what I had in mind Janis: bit weird your head went there, tbh but still Janis: you wanna throw a party anyway, yeah Janis: why not do it then a fuck over any girl thinking she's getting a romantic date night? Jimmy: bit weird they're the same age @Asia with that one Jimmy: but DUH Janis: she's only 14, being fair Janis: sounding more and more like 💀👑 by the second Janis: obvs it goes against every dating rule she has so she's 😤 😠 😡 🤬 🤯 Jimmy: feels dead wrong to split 'em up if that's what she wants Janis: at least it'd give them something else to chat about Janis: all this 💘 is making me sick already Jimmy: has to be a way to do that any road, it's fucking ages til we can have that party if we're doing it then Janis: yeah, I guess so Janis: well keep 💭 then Jimmy: I were 💭 what's another 🎁 that ain't another desk? Jimmy: any 🥇💡s? Janis: 'cos I just do this shit all the time Janis: I don't know Jimmy: Oi, don't be getting mardy with me, I only asked Janis: well don't bother asking questions I clearly don't have the answer to Jimmy: 👌 Janis: you already do all the drawings and far more shit than any lad they go out with Janis: like the whole point Janis: I don't know how we'd up that Jimmy: I said alright Janis: now who's being moody Jimmy: you Jimmy: that'll be why I'm leaving it out Janis: piss off then Jimmy: What's up with you? Janis: nothing, what's wrong with you? Jimmy: you're being a dickhead Janis: how am I? Jimmy: what kind of question is that? Janis: let's just drop it Janis: sure whatever lesson you're in is as equally thrilling as mine Jimmy: or just tell me what's wrong Jimmy: 'cause you were alright a bit ago Janis: I'm just Janis: it don't matter Janis: it's fine Jimmy: bollocks Janis: it can be Janis: 🤫 Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: come on Janis: it's alright Janis: just everyone else getting on my nerves, as per Jimmy: alright Janis: 👍 Jimmy: 👍 Janis: what? Janis: be my mate Jimmy: I am Janis: sorry, alright Jimmy: what were it you said, it don't matter Janis: yeah but Janis: change the subject or something Jimmy: put me on the spot a bit there, dickhead Janis: 😏 Janis: but you're such a natural conversationalist Jimmy: it ain't my fault I can't stop thinking about you long enough to put a sentence together Janis: that's very smooth considering Janis: keep saying things like that, who wouldn't be jealous Jimmy: just how I feel, must not have as many dickheads in this lesson as you Jimmy: ☀ Janis: I'm not not thinking about you Janis: I just don't know what to do about that Janis: maybe less so Jimmy: What do you wanna do about it? Janis: how many lessons you reckon we can realistically walk out of? Jimmy: the rest of 'em Janis: Why are we even staying? Jimmy: we're not Janis: That is the best idea you've ever had Jimmy: I dunno, I reckoned the roof were a decent shout Jimmy: but I get it, soz it took me fucking ages Janis: You didn't get how I felt about the roof? Jimmy: 🤏 Jimmy: might've had some idea Janis: I can show you again but you know Janis: little rude Jimmy: 😏 Janis: Crap with words but there's loads else I can do Jimmy: I were gonna say I heard what I needed to up there but Jimmy: there's loads else I want to Janis: Don't be #overit yet Jimmy: sounds fake, that Jimmy: you just want me to 🗨 how not over it I am Janis: so? Jimmy: I already did do Janis: then I must've really meant it Jimmy: you've got nowt to worry about Janis: good Jimmy: Where we going? Janis: We can go to mine if you don't wanna go to yours Janis: or do you wanna go DO something Jimmy: be #goals whatever happens Jimmy: what do you wanna do? Janis: I'm not thinking about #goals even though that's true Janis: I am thinking about how many times I could make you cum on that fucking bus ride Janis: come to mine, no one will be there, so there's loads of things we can do Jimmy: I just meant that bit don't matter but if I were thinking it did before I don't now Jimmy: and you've already sold me on the fucking bus ride so owt else is a bonus Janis: 😁 seems like a bit of a pisstake but Jimmy: it won't be Jimmy: except for the 👵🚍👀 Janis: They go to town at the crack of dawn Janis: shouldn't be loads Janis: but I can make you forget about that as well Jimmy: I don't care if there is loads Jimmy: I told you, I can't stop thinking about you Janis: It's distracting Janis: you are Janis: but fuck this place anyway Jimmy: *you are Janis: you started it Janis: and I'm not sorry Jimmy: I'm not sorry I started it Janis: Good Janis: it's Janis: working for me Jimmy: you'll forget about whatever's doing your head in in a bit Janis: already have Jimmy: come here then Janis: only if you ask again Jimmy: please Janis: 😍 Janis: okay Janis: [run babies run] Jimmy: [I know you only just went back from the hols but fuck school tbh] Janis: [we aren't that bothered ever but truly, you're both smart enough to pass just fine, we got life to be living and love to be falling into] Jimmy: [got a really long bus ride to be extra through soz not soz it's a whole vibe] Janis: [we're about it, and we can show you the actual decent stuff about the cali residence 'cos it's not the place we dislike it's the people rn soz guys] Jimmy: [we all know it's a cool af house even if there are a 10000000000000 cats] Janis: [lmao, at least they gonna be less fussy than Twix so you'll be alright lads] Jimmy: [have a lovely time but probably avoid your room gal since we're not drunk af like we were on christmas eve] Janis: [we know there's nothing there to show it's fine, y'all can chill wherever you want] Jimmy: [love it for you, honestly surprised you ever bother going to school rn tbh] Janis: [only 'cos we clearly can't hang around mcvickers 'cos they're both old enough to be retired even if they're only semi-retired, and you have to take Bobby to school so like, may as well not like you can get extra shifts when they know you're 15 and not out of school] Jimmy: [and it's an easy way to be #goals as they've already proved with the desk escapades] Janis: [mhmm, and an excuse to see each other you so don't need now but you know] Jimmy: [the tea] Janis: [do we wanna do anything when they are at the gaff etc?} Jimmy: [probably nothing too heavy but if you've got anything you want to happen we can] Janis: [lbr, we know we're being cute af and saucy] Jimmy: [I'm devastated that you can't stay forever as will you be, but at least you'll have a fair while even with the long af bus which is only gonna be fun on the way there unless you're leaving together too] Janis: [you should probably stay gal as the school will call to say you went missing and you'd be better to deal with that rather than have her think you've run away again lol] Janis: 👋 Jimmy: [Gonna be fun going home to Ian, I hope for your sake boy you've got work for a bit first for that reprieve even though it'll probably make him angrier cos you're gone longer] Jimmy: 🥺👋 Janis: [mhmm, like get over it Ian it's one day but ANYWAY] Janis: I wish I could've come Jimmy: and I wish I could've hung about a bit longer Janis: fucking real life, eh Jimmy: nowt'll be more 💔 than if the ☕ start cracking on making themselves and I have to look out for a new way to earn 💰 Jimmy: but I get that you wanna be my fantasy, girl so I won't call it a bit rude that you're 🗨 all that just then were fake Janis: Never happen Janis: they like the fake smile on your face when you give it 'em Janis: not fake Janis: just not 💩 like the rest Jimmy: I'll take all them assurances, tah for not getting too near a compliment Jimmy: thought it were gonna be a bit touch and go at the end there Janis: not to mention the carnage if it was self-service Janis: only afford the steam burns if they're paying you minimum wage Janis: 😘 Janis: shut up Jimmy: not just any dickhead can pull off that many scars Jimmy: 😎🚬 Janis: 😏 Janis: I get it, you want MORE compliments Janis: not like I just spent all day showing you how hot I think you are Jimmy: or more worthwhile wounds Jimmy: unless you're gonna kick off about there being no more time or space for them an' all Janis: Oi Janis: don't make me sound like that bitch Janis: cheek Janis: 🔪 you any time you like, you know that Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: can never have it in writing too many times Janis: you trying to get me done for not keeping my word? Jimmy: 👮🚔 Jimmy: don't bother going back on it and you'll be alright Janis: should've known Janis: you're all the same Jimmy: can't 🗨 you didn't know what you were getting into, Jennifer Jimmy: 🐷💕 Janis: my dads rolling in his grave Jimmy: still 🤞 you and your fake tan'll put mine in his Janis: I'll put on my nan's accent Janis: turn it up a notch Jimmy: 😂 Janis: or just intro them Janis: he'd feel so #attacked Jimmy: only if you can promise me she'll chuck a bible at him Janis: 🤞 Janis: can't promise much about her but it's 99% Jimmy: it's a date then 🍷🍞 Janis: 😂 Janis: enjoy Jimmy: be PROPER awks if we've misread this and she ends up my new mum Janis: She's still got delusions about being the pastor's wife Janis: she's too nosy to settle down and have her own life anyway, you're fine Jimmy: poor bloke Janis: your dad or father daddy? Jimmy: not chucking any sympathy Ian's way Jimmy: he's always got the full orchestra playing for himself, there's no need Janis: got ya Janis: I'll make it up to him whenever I get 'round the repenting Jimmy: me an' all Jimmy: bit of time with me on my knees'll sort him right out Janis: fuck off Janis: we're not sharing Jimmy: Why not? Janis: 'cos I want him Janis: get your own boyfriend, bitch Jimmy: thank GOD Pete'll be in Janis: 😒 Janis: shot myself in the foot there Jimmy: made your 🛏 have to lie in it with the hot priest, you Janis: 😣 😖 😫 Janis: don't be mean Janis: it was an involuntary reaction Janis: being a twin means you don't want to share anything Jimmy: you're alright, I'm more forgiving than him and his mate in the ☁s Jimmy: might let you be my mate again eventually Janis: aaaaand share your boyfriend, yeah? Janis: thanks 💖 Jimmy: be up to him, that Jimmy: but agreeing to having a go at being his lead 🎤's bound to make up his mind Jimmy: the lad he got last time you said no is shite Janis: Oh God Janis: do they play the CG? Janis: 😬 Jimmy: that gonna make you rush in or steer clear? Janis: I'm not sure I can fake the enthusiasm Janis: and yes, that IS saying something, thank you Janis: tell him to 📞 me if they ever start getting paid Jimmy: @ him yourself Jimmy: loads of jobs but none of 'em are as your messenger boy Jimmy: ain't chucked 🗞️🗞️🗞️ about for ages Janis: you're such a slag Janis: called playing it cool Janis: look it up 🤓 Jimmy: look up frigid Jimmy: 🥶🥶🧊 Janis: piss off Jimmy: didn't reckon on that rumour being the one that were true but here we are Janis: don't be a twat Janis: you literally know it isn't Jimmy: still feel free to remind me whenever you like Janis: yeah, really convincing that Jimmy: What, you need MORE convincing than earlier on? Janis: oh, now you're calling me a slag Janis: make up your mind and shut up, yeah? Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: 👍 Jimmy: you planning to leave me with my 💭 this whole 🚍 ride? Janis: I should Janis: but it is longer than the journey to hell so Jimmy: you have left me loads to think about, give you that Jimmy: 🏆🥇 Janis: it's mutual Janis: is an understatement Jimmy: yeah, I felt that Janis: bit rude Janis: every time I think seeing you is gonna get you out of my head Janis: never does though Jimmy: bit rude that you want me out when you've said you've not got owt else on Janis: yeah but I can't be around you all the time so it's just inconvenient Jimmy: I'm not stopping you and my 👻 manager'd have a job to Jimmy: and we've already proved school can't Janis: If you're still there when I've dealt with my ma Janis: could Jimmy: if not you know where else I'll be Janis: yeah Janis: I do have work to do and all though Jimmy: OBVS Jimmy: 🐕's can't 🏃 themselves without the owners getting right mardy Janis: Thank God Janis: can't be arsed to sing for my supper yet Jimmy: after though Jimmy: you can do us a lullaby Janis: you just want me to sleep over Jimmy: Oi, don't make me sound like them huns Janis: 💅💄🍿☕️🧸💖 Janis: you Jimmy: Piss off Jimmy: will you hang about if I let you chuck 🧸s about and smack me with a pillow or what? Janis: your nightmare not mine Janis: but as you asked nicely Jimmy: 👍 Janis: What song do you want? Janis: 🎶😴 Jimmy: what song do you wanna do? Janis: [list off some hilariously inappropriate lullabies] Jimmy: number 6 Janis: 😏 Janis: thank god the little ones deaf Janis: hate to be a bad influence Jimmy: 🖍👂 were bad enough Janis: mini 💘story is worse Jimmy: but that's nowt to do with us Janis: 'course not Janis: so pure and real Jimmy: be worse if they hated each other like him and Amsterdam, never be able to chuck him anywhere Janis: yeah Janis: and she's annoying whatever she's 🗨 about so makes no odds to me Jimmy: we better start being the NICEST ever to your nan so he can sleep there and not piss on our party plans Janis: that'll involve you not being as nice as you wanna, perv Janis: tone it down Jimmy: tone down your jealousy, Jules, I'll come to your window an' all Janis: She don't fancy you, sorry to break it to you Jimmy: she's not gonna admit it to you, dickhead Janis: She's not gonna be able to fake that with a remotely straight face, more like Jimmy: must be where you get it from Janis: better than you Jimmy: bollocks Janis: nah Jimmy: yeah Janis: no Jimmy: based on what? Janis: erm, all my performances vs yours, OBVS Jimmy: mine's been as good as yours Janis: hmm Janis: 😂 Jimmy: you're just being a twat 'cause your fit nan 💕s me Janis: and you're just mad 'cos Will wouldn't even cast you as a background character Jimmy: he has done so that's even more bollocks you're chatting now Jimmy: should be chuffed she's not going blind, babe Janis: bit awkward to boot you now Janis: massive head, takes a lot to shift Jimmy: far as excuses go, a TOP athlete like you should have better Jimmy: 🥉 if that Janis: let me start auditions first, arsehole Jimmy: 👌 Janis: 👌 Jimmy: 👍 Janis: stop it Janis: you're the one being a twat, twat Jimmy: how am I? Janis: Where do I start? Janis: I'd rather just not, as I just said Jimmy: at buying some time before you have a proper go 'cause you know I've done nowt wrong, by the sounds of it Jimmy: but alright Janis: I didn't say you'd done anything wrong Janis: just that you were being annoying on purpose Jimmy: Why would I bother with that? Janis: You tell me Jimmy: the answer is I obvs wouldn't Janis: OBVS Janis: 👍 Jimmy: you stop it Janis: I'm not doing anything Janis: so yeah, alright Jimmy: exactly Jimmy: I'd be in the group chat if I were trying to 🗨 in 👍👌🙄 Janis: not my job to entertain you is it Jimmy: I never said it were Jimmy: if you were on the clock it wouldn't be like pulling 🦷🦷 trying to have a word Janis: oh, whatever Janis: I don't like talking, that's not news and it's none of your business Jimmy: and you've heard I like talking to you when you're not being a MASSIVE dickhead Jimmy: give me a clue when that'll be Janis: I've got other shit on Jimmy: and I've not? Janis: I never said you didn't Janis: that was you Jimmy: I'm just not using it as a bollocks excuse to be a twat Janis: I'm not excusing anything, I'm saying you don't know what I do or don't have on, at any point Jimmy: 'cause it's none of my business, you just said Janis: basically, yeah Jimmy: whatever, as you said an' all Jimmy: in a bit Janis: later then Jimmy: yeah Janis: [you're gonna have to leave this some time and I'm gonna have to fix it, well done gal, not leaving it too long though 'cos not that deep so just deal with it, you could still be on the bus tbh lmao] Jimmy: [seeds are being sown and honestly yeah it is a really long bus ride I hope you left yourself enough time boy or you'll be late for work] Janis: sorry, okay Janis: just ignore me, I'm just stressed Janis: you've not done anything Jimmy: I got that Jimmy: how stressed you are Janis: yeah, I know Janis: you don't need that ever Janis: let alone before work Jimmy: @iantaylor8 before I get back, might stop him getting a mard on an' all Janis: He's gonna be raging? Jimmy: when's he not? Jimmy: he'll be chuffed to bits I gave him something to have a go about Jimmy: you talk to your mum yet? Janis: Any excuse Janis: not like we had anything important on today Janis: or ever, really but you know Janis: she won't be back for a bit Janis: just avoiding my sisters in the meantime Jimmy: how many 🐕s you done? Janis: got six here that all walk together alright, get that in before she's back Jimmy: 💰 on my sister not having done ours, you can use that as a reason to piss off when you need Janis: If she ain't seething, might drop me off Janis: save the dog's bladder bursting whilst the bus goes round every fucking street on the way Jimmy: didn't go back at lunch, might already be 💀💀💀 Janis: shit Janis: what time is your dad back? Jimmy: probably will be,  have to check the 👞👟🥾 Jimmy: house'll be trashed if nowt else Jimmy: meant to be 🕠 but it never is Janis: I can leave a note at mine Janis: be there well before he is Janis: only took a day off, say I got that period or whatever Jimmy: not your problem, no need to cause any with your mum for the 🐕's sake Janis: it's not a problem Janis: just replying that I hadn't run away earlier when the school messaged her was more than enough Jimmy: alright Janis: won't charge extra for mopping up piss Janis: didn't think, when I said we should go to mine Jimmy: you don't have to Jimmy: mop up piss or 💭🐕💔 Janis: you can't, you're already doing a job so Jimmy: he can get the mop out, it were his 🥇💡 to get a dog Janis: may as well though Jimmy: IOU then Janis: nah Janis: 'cos IOU Jimmy: Oi, don't be turning me down Jimmy: any time you fancy having a piss on my floor, I'll sort it Janis: 😂 Janis: thanks Janis: big #kinkunlocked obviously Jimmy: I know, that'll be why I'm allowing it Janis: Well considerate of you Jimmy: sound more shocked, Joanne Janis: I ain't Jimmy: good Janis: you know I didn't mean it Jimmy: What bit? Janis: not wanting to talk to you Jimmy: I got that when you started talking to me again Janis: yeah, alright Janis: just saying Jimmy: what's gonna make you 😁? Janis: Is that what you want? Jimmy: what kind of question is that? Jimmy: not like I've spent ages today trying to do it or owt Janis: I can not be a moody bitch without being 😁 though, honest Jimmy: and I can make you 😁 Jimmy: challenge accepted Janis: you have Janis: loads Jimmy: it don't matter if your face ain't stuck like it Jimmy: I'll have another go Janis: what about you? Jimmy: What about me? Janis: What emoji do you want me to make you? Jimmy: your fav obvs Jimmy: 🤗 Janis: 😏 Janis: I'll do my best Jimmy: I get it, you know Jimmy: what you said before about the rest being 💩 Janis: it just really shows how shit everything else and everyone is Janis: how boring and just Janis: bit of a headfuck Jimmy: yeah and I get it an' all that you have shit you have to do but Jimmy: I meant what I said about you not having to go nowhere Jimmy: my 🏠'll be trashed and the 🐕's a dickhead but you can still hang around whenever you want Janis: I don't though Janis: not in comparison to you, that's just the truth Janis: it just makes me sound pathetic when you put it like that Janis: but thanks Jimmy: shut up, you've got a job same as me Janis: you know what I mean Jimmy: I know I ain't gonna hold it over your head that your mum ain't chucking 👶s at you to look after or being a massive bellend all the time Jimmy: what kind of weird 🎻💔😭 bollocks 🏆s is that? Janis: well I knew you'd hate it that's why I didn't say it earlier Janis: I'm just not trying to take the piss with stupid non-problems Jimmy: everyone's got shit, not just me Janis: yeah Janis: and I've got plenty Janis: being stressed about skiving school ain't one of 'em though, it weren't that Jimmy: I never thought it were Janis: I've got a handle on it now though Jimmy: alright Jimmy: made that 😁 challenge even more piss easy for me then Janis: You mad about that or Janis: I can make it harder again easy Jimmy: go on, I ain't 🙀🙀 Jimmy: 💪🏆🥇 me Janis: 😶 there you go Janis: complete blank slate Jimmy: Tah Janis: Yeah well, all the pressure Jimmy: that meant to be a ✔ or ❌? Janis: it means I'm doing what you asked and giving you an actual challenge Jimmy: that consideration's catching Janis: great Janis: need a cream for that, do I Jimmy: might do if it starts irritating you, like Jimmy: 🤞 it don't react with your fake tan Janis: is red more or less offensive than beige? 🤔 Jimmy: less Jimmy: colour of 🩸🌹💘 Bill's fav, that Janis: we already know he 💘s me Janis: about making your dad 😡🤬 not me Jimmy: already did do Jimmy: nowt challenging about making Ian fuming Janis: yeah but that's what you want me to do and keep doing Jimmy: it's not why I want you to stay Janis: it'd be a bit rude if that was all you wanted me for Jimmy: I just mean he's not the reason I do owt Jimmy: doing his head in gives my sister something to do with her 😡🤬 but he don't matter to me Janis: yeah, it isn't about him Janis: but getting him fuming enough you can all go home is, I mean Jimmy: which ain't even been working Jimmy: as plans go it were never 🥇 Janis: what letter plan was it? Jimmy: you know I can't count, mate Jimmy: dunno my letters either Janis: we don't have to talk about it though Janis: not right now Jimmy: We're here so whatever goes I had at getting him to not take the job or owt I did to try and stop us from leaving didn't work Jimmy: what's to talk about? Janis: you're giving up? Jimmy: never said that Janis: alright Janis: I get it Jimmy: do you? Janis: you either haven't thought out your next step, or I can't help you with it and it isn't my business Janis: either way, don't wanna or have to talk about it now Jimmy: 👌 Janis: not a total idiot, cheers Jimmy: never said that either Jimmy: feeling like one 'cause you had a massive strop is nowt to do with me Janis: fuck off Janis: 1. I didn't 2. Weren't talking about that no more Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: what are you rolling your eyes at me for Jimmy: what you mean you don't get that? Jimmy: don't sound like you Janis: wow Janis: nice Jimmy: just leave it out Janis: whatever Jimmy: 👍 Janis: I'm not staying, pay me whatever you would your sister for the dog Jimmy: I don't pay her Jimmy: @ my dad for his rates Janis: obviously not Jimmy: don't come then, even easier, that Janis: It's nothing to do with you Janis: the dog needs walking Jimmy: not by you Janis: why not Jimmy: why are you SO bothered? Janis: because it's needless and cruel Janis: it isn't hard Janis: and it's literally what I do so just shut up Jimmy: it ain't hard for my sister to do it Janis: is she going to or are you fobbing me off Jimmy: not a 🧠📖 Janis: for fuck's sake Janis: I don't need your permission, I'm going round anyway Jimmy: you don't get nowt so don't act like you do Janis: fine, take your 🎻💔😭🏆 and shove it Jimmy: ✔ Janis: so glad you're happy Jimmy: so glad you ain't lost your sense of humour Janis: the gags that I never had one, so where's yours Jimmy: Dunno, maybe you'll find it when you're pissing about at mine Jimmy: places the spare 🔑 has to get left are getting weirder and weirder Janis: I'm just knocking Janis: you might be arsed but doubt your sisters stopping me doing a job for her Jimmy: be about right Janis: be weird id she cared Janis: if* Jimmy: no weirder than you reckoning she'll bother to answer the door Janis: You're being ridiculous Jimmy: that's you Janis: no, it ain't Jimmy: yeah it is, this 🐕💔 being the hill you wanna 💀💀💀 on Janis: I told you why Janis: not rocket science Jimmy: and I told you why not to, neither's that Janis: I didn't say it was your fault but it's not fair on the dog and you know that Janis: I'm not gonna pretend I don't 'cos you're pissed off with me Jimmy: 📞 the rspca then, be doing me a bigger favour than this bollocks is Janis: if you wanted to, you would've done it yourself Janis: the kid 💕 it and that's why Jimmy: funny way of showing it she's got Jimmy: can't even do something she gets 💰 chucked at her for Janis: yeah and that hardly takes a genius to work out either Jimmy: no need for you to get your head round what's up with her an' all Janis: stop acting like I'm fucking therapizing you Jimmy: stop doing it Janis: fuck this Jimmy: yeah Janis: [you better walk away gal but we're clearly going to attempt to walk Twix still] Jimmy: [at least he's not there so you won't brawl] Janis: [oh the drama mick] Jimmy: [oh boy, it's not her fault you don't wanna leave dublin anymore, well it is but don't be rude] Janis: [quite literally your fault but that's a convo we're not ready to have yet clearly lol] Jimmy: [a convo we've literally had twice drunk lol lol] Janis: [oh lads, we're literally in such a tiz, thank god you didn't stay home tbh] Jimmy: [don't need to have a blazing row with your poor mother] Janis: [make this Thing an actual Thing™ though that is lowkey the deal in the fam being suspish of you boy but still] Jimmy: [literally don't know how I'm gonna fix this because he thinks he's in the right here, sir your pants] Janis: [like he's not not but we didn't really get what he was saying 'cos neither of you was saying enough/the right things lol] Jimmy: [she's not a mind reader either jimothy] Janis: [fair, we're probably going to go out and get drunk somewhere so I could always come @ you] Jimmy: [good idea because that's not a luxury he has until work is over at least and even then not really because Ian will be throwing his toys out of the pram] Janis: [yeah, like he's really not gonna be in the mood is he but we'll do it anyway, good luck lmao] Jimmy: [how much later are we saying it is like is he at work or has it been ages?] Janis: [well it's fully a monday so like what kind of party would be happening, so it's probably on the earlier side like we're just 'hanging' somewhere and drinking, but by the time we come for you you can probably be leaving work/home like] Jimmy: [makes sense] Janis: are you okay? Janis: what did he do? Janis: can't stop thinking about it Jimmy: I'm not back yet, nowt to worry about Janis: oh Janis: it's not that late Janis: still so dark 🌨⛄ Jimmy: you alright? Janis: yeah Janis: but no too Jimmy: ? Janis: I don't like it when we don't talk Janis: but I'm not dying in a ditch, that's what I mean Jimmy: but where are you? Janis: at the park with some people Janis: not the park, a park though Jimmy: what park? Jimmy: it's freezing Janis: I don't know, the one on [some estate he's not going to know gal but anyway, a let's get drunk in parks energy] Janis: it's not that cold, had my coat on anyway Jimmy: SO helpful, you Jimmy: it's not that cold now you're pissed, my dear Janis: That is half the point Janis: idk what you expect me to tell you, it's not like the park has a name, just a bit of grass and some swings Jimmy: I've got a map up 🤞 I get there before you 🥶🥶🥶 Janis: you're coming to see me? Janis: but you're angry at me Jimmy: I'm bringing you ☕ to warm and sober you up a bit, then I'm taking you to your nans Janis: I don't want to Jimmy: you wanna go home? Janis: god no Jimmy: you can't stay there Janis: not all night Janis: but it isn't even late Jimmy: not the point, dickhead Jimmy: I've got enough to worry about without adding you to the list Janis: don't worry about me Janis: I'm just trying to have fun Janis: I'm worried about you Jimmy: bit late for that Janis: 😠 Jimmy: don't you start, girl, I've hung up my apron now Jimmy: already on my way Janis: you can't try to seduce me to change the subject Janis: not that drunk Jimmy: weren't the plan Janis: why you talking like that then Jimmy: what? Janis: like Mias there and you want her to fancy you too Jimmy: I dunno what you're on about Janis: daddy 👏 energy 👏 Janis: anyway, literally said you wouldn't distract from the point so sh Jimmy: you Janis: but Jimmy: 🤫 Janis: sorry for caring Jimmy: it weren't what you signed up for Janis: not what you signed me up for, you mean Jimmy: go on, make it sound more like I forced you into something Janis: that's like Janis: the opposite of what I'm saying Jimmy: alright Janis: you keep turning things 'round and it's not what I mean Jimmy: just say what you mean Janis: I am Janis: I'm trying Janis: I just don't want you to get really hurt again but I can't do anything about it Jimmy: there's nowt I can do about it either Jimmy: how do you think I feel? Janis: I can't imagine Jimmy: don't Jimmy: 💭❌ Janis: I were never saying I knew what that was like Janis: I wouldn't Jimmy: not something I want us to have in common Janis: 'course not Jimmy: there you go then, can't have a go at you for not having a clue Janis: you can Janis: or you could just tell me what you do want me to do Janis: or say Janis: or not say or do Jimmy: that'd be taking the daddy energy a bit far, babe Janis: alright, not any other time, tah Janis: just let me fix this Janis: and not fuck it up again Jimmy: you heard Jimmy: there's nowt either of us can do Janis: okay Janis: I know that Janis: but how do I not annoy you about it Janis: because I don't think I can just fake that I don't know Jimmy: I don't have an answer I can just chuck at you Janis: okay then Jimmy: if I did I'd have loads of mates and a real girlfriend, duh Jimmy: that charming and social, me Janis: I'm glad you don't have a girlfriend though Jimmy: me and Bill's 👻 an' all Janis: I've got no friends either Jimmy: Oi, what am I? Janis: I don't know Janis: what are you Jimmy: 💔 RUDE Jimmy: I'm your best mate Janis: my best mate Janis: who I think about every time I cum, alright Jimmy: why isn't it? Janis: just confusing Janis: it can be both Janis: probably Jimmy: don't have to be if we just 🗨 Jimmy: it's been alright up til now Janis: very rude if that's your review Jimmy: shut up, you know what I mean Janis: do you want me to 🗨 or 🤫 Janis: just confused now 😏 Jimmy: I've missed you but if you wanna change my mind about it Janis: no, no Janis: I can behave Jimmy: making promises you can't keep Janis: cheek Jimmy: we'll see when I get there Janis: I missed you too Janis: I don't know what's wrong with me Jimmy: other than being a massive pisshead, you mean Janis: psh Janis: what else am I meant to do Jimmy: you want a list or what? Janis: yes, go on Jimmy: 1. 🗨 to me 2. come 👋 to me and my 👻 manager 3. workshop a 💀💀💀 scene with Bill 4. 🐕🏃 5. @ Lucas or 💀👑's dad for a lift Jimmy: just off the top of my head Janis: 1. we weren't 🗨 2. so I couldn't 👋 even if your manager actually existed 3. he's your mate 4. you definitely didn't want me to do that earlier either 5. just admit you want me 💀💀💀 now like Jimmy: 1. gotta start somewhere, Jessica 2. he were actually about, believe it or not! 3. he is with THAT attitude 4. I definitely don't want you spending all my 💰 either 5. I ALWAYS want to 💀💀💀 you, I've admitted that before Janis: 1. what's this? 2. so sad I missed him/my chance to seduce him for a job then 3. #ladsladslads with him forever 4. only said that 'cos you made me mad and I said for like a five not ALL your 💰 not that stereotype 5. then why are you letting either of them do it instead? Jimmy: 1. but before or instead of getting off your head were the point 2. 💔 for you and him both 3. speaking of, how many lads off that estate am I gonna have to smack before we can leave? 4. you still fuming at me or what? 5. never said I'd let it happen, just that it could do Janis: I'm not still mad at you Janis: it was a solid 60% my fault anyway Janis: I don't even know what we were talking about or then why we weren't, really Jimmy: then how do you know owt were your fault? Janis: 'cos you've explained since Jimmy: I were being a dickhead, it's not you Janis: no, it's alright Janis: you weren't Jimmy: I were and it's not alright Jimmy: you're the only bit that's not shit and taking the rest out on you ain't gonna change them, it'll only fuck this up an' all Janis: I'm not looking to make any of it harder Janis: that's not what a mate should do Jimmy: and I made it loads easier for you a bit ago when I already knew you weren't 😁 Janis: that's really nothing though Janis: stupid high school level shit Jimmy: meant to be cheering you up, that's what I said I'd do Jimmy: not nowt that I did the opposite Janis: okay, but I wasn't helping you none neither Janis: so we can be even Jimmy: 🤝 Janis: 🤝 Janis: am I going to need to come find you? Jimmy: what kind of question is that? Janis: um, a really valid one from experience Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: I'm not the one who's pissed, tah very much Janis: you exaggerate Jimmy: you take the piss Jimmy: I'm not lost Janis: okay, okay Janis: it'd be rude not to check Janis: you could die Janis: or 🥶🥶🥶 Jimmy: too northern for that bollocks Jimmy: what kind of truce is this? Janis: 🤐 Jimmy: have a swing, I'll be there in a bit Janis: someone's hoyed 'em over Janis: so rude Jimmy: fuck's sake Jimmy: never did answer me on how many lads I'd have to 🥊 Janis: Not sure if it was one of them Janis: I'll ask for you Jimmy: 💰 on it being you when you were FUMING Jimmy: trying to blame these poor lads now Janis: 😱 Janis: I WOULD NEVER Janis: pain to get back down, even if your da is like, freakishly tall or something Jimmy: never admit it now I've caught you out, more like Jimmy: know what you're like Jimmy: trying to show off and make the most of your 🦒 perks Janis: yeah, all these lads are SO cool Jimmy: never said it were for them Jimmy: might've been waiting to impress me Janis: well are you impressed? Jimmy: haven't seen the state of nowt yet Janis: you're an idiot Jimmy: yeah 🤏 Janis: I like it Jimmy: then I'll live Janis: Jimmy Jimmy: ? Janis: Would it make it better or worse if I come back to yours Jimmy: better this time, worse the next Janis: What would you rather I do? Jimmy: you know the answer to that Janis: but are you sure Jimmy: are you? Janis: I'll be fine going to my nans, for me Janis: I don't know what's better for you Janis: yeah, I can delay it now, or let it be less tonight than it COULD be Janis: but neither of those feels good Janis: so I just wanna do what you want Jimmy: so stay Janis: okay Jimmy: okay Janis: we could get rid of him the old-fashioned way Jimmy: stop flirting with me Jimmy: I'll get lost Janis: seriously Janis: how hard can it be Jimmy: piss easy if you don't care about the bit where you get caught Jimmy: how you gonna walk my 🐕 from prison? Janis: well that's why we do it properly Janis: just need to do the groundwork Janis: keep slyly telling any nosy neighbours you're moving back soon because he's lost his job, so they don't @ him Janis: then backdate a resignation letter to send to his work Jimmy: then what? Jimmy: can't actually piss off back up north without the dickhead Janis: well, you could, ferry is well cheap Janis: what you'd do when you get there is another issue Jimmy: keep dreaming, baby Jimmy: it's never gonna happen Jimmy: you're stuck with me for a bit Janis: I don't want you to leave anyway Janis: not my dream Jimmy: what'd you bring it up for then? Janis: you could stay and we could kill him Jimmy: we'd be prime suspects Jimmy: and they'd take the 👶👶🐕 off me Janis: nah, 'cos if we sort work and your neighbours and move you in with me who's looking Janis: 💡 Janis: see Jimmy: your whole family'd be 👀🍿 Jimmy: and your 🐕 best mate'd be eaten by 🐈🐈🐈 Janis: hardly Janis: 2 of my sisters got married before they were 20 and one of 'em is dead Janis: can't say nothing Janis: don't fight how much sense it makes tah Jimmy: you're so Janis: fucked up? Jimmy: not what I were gonna say Janis: they are Janis: try and distance myself from it but Jimmy: if we were judging each other by our family I'd come off loads worse Jimmy: no tah Janis: no need to have the competition Jimmy: 'cause you're losing Janis: nah Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: 🏆 goes to me Janis: nope no no no nah Janis: you have no idea and you don't need it Jimmy: alright, stop going on about it and 🗨 something you want me to know Janis: 😳 Jimmy: go on Janis: bit on the spot, like you say Jimmy: but you're 💭 about something or you wouldn't be 😳 Janis: too bad you're not a 🧠📖 Jimmy: just have to read your body language instead Jimmy: [show up sir] Janis: ['scuse us random park people, biggest run and hug ever] Jimmy: [holding onto her for the longest time and we're not sorry] Janis: [lowkey like don't cry gal, so overwhelmed and drunk dangerous combo here] Jimmy: [gal we know all about trying not to cry Imma get you out of here asap] Janis: [not letting you say anything intelligible yet] Jimmy: [it's fine we're totally picking her up so we can leave] Janis: [soz not soz to the lads who clearly thought you were about to get off with them or something] Jimmy: [bye bye boys have fun] Janis: [hope you're near enough to his lads 'I'm really sorry'] Jimmy: ['it's alright' cos it is and snuggling her as we carry her like] Janis: [sighs 'it's not' but we mean everything else so we're snuggling him back even harder Jimmy: [kissing the top of her head like yeah it is] Janis: ['you're the loveliest, that's what I want you to know'] Jimmy: [clearly 😳 about this because not what we expected her to say but we're also doing a little genuine smile so] Janis: [just softly stroking his cheeks though you probably can't even see in this light/state we just know, about to blurt something about but just about catching ourselves 'tell me something then'] Jimmy: ['are you gonna remember it?' cos we gonna catch ourselves too before being too extra] Janis: ['yes!' indignantly like how dare you, nudging him like go on 'I'll tell you another if you do'] Jimmy: ['alright, one thing I want you to know is how much this means' keeping it deliberately vague as if we're just talking about the Ian situation because we clearly aren't lol 'to me that you-that you're-' still not finishing our sentences though soz about it] Janis: [squeezing him wherever you're holding onto him, but gently please let's not fall and die here although 'I love you' not leaving like a sec here 'like I care about you, you know' and how rushed that last bit is like and I oop] Jimmy: [we've straight up died so whatever we say back is too muffled to understand because we're hardcore hiding in the bae and also using our softest voice ever] Janis: [casual panic happening in silence here but we move, meant it and can't take it back so at least you're drunk enough that you can't really try to run away rn] Jimmy: [lifting our head when she moves because we think she's gonna try and run away and that's a hard no from us 'always gotta one up me, you' but we're still using our soft voice so you know it's not a pisstake 'not gonna win the awards against you but I care about you an' all'] Janis: [shrugs like yes, that's what it was, of course 'just that good'] Jimmy: ['I know' giving her 😍 as we say it because we mean it] Janis: [going in for a makeout moment] Jimmy: [allowing it because he also meant it when he said he missed her and the feels are too high not to even though she's drunk and he's obvs not] Janis: [it's fine, we know we're being extra with it because we are drunk so it's not like you've got it wrong boy] Jimmy: [we're being extra too cos we're in our emotions and I don't trust you to speak rn sir, always makes me laugh like how far have we even gotten away from this park] Janis: [seriously, like you already said it girl you better stop lmao, I hope far enough that we're not giving a free show, also you're nearly at his but probably not knowing y'all] Jimmy: [hope you're at least off this estate so we're not getting whistled and shouted at by chavs cos that'll really ruin the moment] Janis: [like get that you're both in this moment but there's only so much you can ignore really] Jimmy: [I'll make it rain or snow if I have to lads so that'll move along, don't test me] Janis: [least you're gonna have some urgency by how hard we're going rn 'cos no shame] Jimmy: [an incentive to get home is very much needed cos Ian will be a delight] Janis: [I'm like gal do not speak that could be disastrous] Jimmy: [going upstairs immediately for all the reasons] Janis: [can't come for Ian and his life, it'd be amusing but make everything worse so not rn, in that bed tah] Jimmy: [we'll give you other opportunities gal but this is not the one] Janis: [not when you're drunk, not gonna be witty, just like fuck you bitch] Jimmy: [it's gonna be ages before you get back anyway cos we know y'all will keep stopping, never any chill] Janis: [we all know it, there is no chill now or ever] Jimmy: [hence I am making you walk, not letting you anywhere near a bus or anything rn] Janis: [do we wanna skip to being at his or to the AM or quoiiiii] Jimmy: [good question, we can probably skip to later at his because you can't avoid Ian forever, even if we're kind and say he's not around when they first get there] Janis: [what's your vibe like is he gonna come in and make Jimmy come out to talk or ambush him like what's the tea sis] Jimmy: [I feel like Jimothy's gonna have to go make tea at some point because it's his love language so he'll probably get ambushed in the kitchen then] Janis: [ugh SIR] Jimmy: [is nothing sacred you bitch, but at least she'll be upstairs so she can't brawl him and Twix will run up cos she will be scared so that'll distract you gal] Janis: [like if we heard brawling ourselves we would come down but I'd like to hope you're keeping it to shouting rn, have some shame dickhead, just look after this baby dog] Jimmy: [I would hope he is just shouting because he's that dickhead that wants to appear like he's not one and like what's to stop Janis telling literally everyone including her social worker nan so] Janis: [right, even if you think she's trash, I don't think you're being that dumb with it ever] Jimmy: [shamelessly just gonna bring the bae tea and biscuits as if that didn't happen] Janis: [trying not to be like !!! but we're also not gonna pretend as hard, patting the bed like come here] Jimmy: [obvs we do and do a feelsy lean when we're there cos we both need it] Janis: ['really wants Lucas to like him' because we know there's fuck all we can actually say to be of use, but we're tucking him back in and cuddling him] Jimmy: [a little lol because 1. funny 2. not what we expected her to say 3. relief that she hasn't said something that'll make it awks and that Ian didn't kick off any harder/try and kick her out] Janis: [equally small smile 'cos we love to see it but we do not love the rest of this situation so we're not buzzing obviously] Jimmy: [draw it bigger with our fingertip because we've remembered our 😁 challenge] Janis: [write LOL on him like okay, whilst we're here let's sort that out] Jimmy: [do some !! on her like epic lols please] Janis: [go to tickle him like it can be arranged] Jimmy: [obvs tickling her back like excuse you it's meant to be you doing it] Janis: [we are loling but still trying to tickle him and get him too] Jimmy: [never far from a playfight which I love for you and also I imagine that Twix is probably still around so joining in] Janis: [don't bark gal or do because we don't care about you Ian but bit rude to Cass, just pinning him and being like 'my offer still stands' which like, explain yourself but we're not lol] Jimmy: [also don't spill that tea or crush those biscuits/ let Twix get either of them while you're living your best life, obvs giving her a look like ?] Janis: [my boo always so concerned about the tea situation, runs a finger along his throat and looks meaningfully at the door like you know who] Jimmy: [I am and I'm not soz boo, but jimothy meanwhile is gonna just give you a lovebite/go over an existing one on your throat gal like I'd rather just kill you thank you] Janis: [doing the opposite of complaining about it] Jimmy: [taking the encouragement and going harder as a result of it duh] Janis: [when you can't breathe casually, pulling him closer into us 'please'] Jimmy: [kick that dog out so she doesn't cockblock you soz Twix, casually looks like you're like nope and leaving] Janis: [Twix is probably 🥺 but we definitely are x2 🥺🥺] Jimmy: [don't worry we're running back immediately to kiss you INTENSELY] Janis: [getting in his lap, duh, and looking at him for ages 'lovely' like yes, I was correct] Jimmy: [putting his finger on her nose like he's pointing at her cos no you] Janis: [grabbing the finger and then we're holding both his hands 'how am I going to make you happy?'] Jimmy: ['you already have done' because true that we've already forgotten about Ian's bullshit lbr cos we're in love] Janis: ['I could do better' 'you deserve better'] Jimmy: ['you just wanna take the challenge off me' because we can't even deal with our emotions over her saying that] Janis: ['I just wanna-' and kissing him again like let me show you] Jimmy: [a very enthusiastic response in all the ways possible because same] Janis: [have your moment kiddos, cannot express how much she's calling him baby] Jimmy: [cannot overstate how into that he is and will forever be] Janis: [being a perfect combo of intense but soft rn] Jimmy: [Cass gonna wish she was deaf too, first Ian shouting and now this lol] Janis: [thank god for headphones gal soz still not gonna be our fan for a while lol] Jimmy: [she's really not cos already had to dump Bobby on her when we had work then had to find Janis and now all this is shamelessly going on, soz gal] Janis: [it's fine, we'd hate us too in your position and we will win you 'round in the end] Jimmy: [I'm sure Jimothy will also do something to make it up to you cos he's just that bitch even though he's fuming at you for not walking Twix ever] Janis: [lowkey don't deserve it but you lucky gal and not shading you too hard] Jimmy: [we all know you're strugging rn gal it's okay] Janis: [not helping your brother but this isn't meant to be your job any more than it's meant to be his] Jimmy: [and we'll let you get your bf and friends soon and then you can walk Twix together] Janis: [and you'll be happy, despite the fact you go back up north, that's your business hen] Jimmy: [what if he sends her a valentine and that's what starts this lil otp] Janis: [that would be very cute do it] Jimmy: [like idk if he goes to your school or if he's putting in through your door or if he even signs it but we know bitch] Janis: [we should be nice and say he goes to your school so you have company but it should be a ? 'cos that's cute, I've only ever got one of those and it was from nannie haha] Jimmy: [I've derailed us but yeah that felt like a nice thing to happen amidst all the drama] Janis: [hohaha you'd be so embarrassed gal, be nice Jimothy aka shamelessly tease her] Jimmy: [simply must] Janis: [but yes, we're probably good for tonight unless you really wanna 'round 2 Ian] Jimmy: [do you wanna do the am?] Janis: [sure ting honey, it's a tuesday, so you'll be having to get Bobby ready for school and Ian will be gone so that's good] Jimmy: [leaving the bae in bed while we do our big brother duties but we will be bringing you breakfast gal you know it] Janis: 👋😪 Janis: you want any help? Jimmy: did I teach you the signs for hurry the fuck up? Janis: 🤔 Janis: [clip of her doing the thing where you gesture towards yourself frantically like LETS GO] Janis: ? Jimmy: that'd do Janis: does he know I'm here? Jimmy: he'd have come to ask you loads of questions about his missus if he did Janis: 💔 ouch Jimmy: if you fancy jumping out at him, the 🐕'll give you a hand knocking him about and getting his attention Janis: I'm not that offended Janis: be a bit rude Janis: plus if your sister knows I'm here, she definitely wants to see me even less Jimmy: but I might want to Jimmy: bit rude of you not to think about that Janis: Please Janis: I think about you ALL the time Janis: and you've seen a lot of me lately Jimmy: 🥺🥺🥺 Jimmy: me and the 🐕 are having a 💔💪🏆 Janis: she's FUMING at me Janis: I went to the bathroom and she was giving me 🔪🔪👀 Jimmy: the 🐕 or my sister? Janis: 🐕 Janis: your fault Janis: haven't you noticed her 😤 😠 😡 🤬 Jimmy: Oi, nowt to do with me, I never said you went to the park without her Janis: you kicked her out Janis: I remember Janis: also she was scrapping at the door Jimmy: not my fault you never said that were a kink of yours Jimmy: should've if you wanted her kept in Janis: shut up Janis: I said she was mad, not me Jimmy: she'll get over it once I sort her breakfast out Jimmy: what do you want? Janis: for 🥞🧇🥓🍳 or in life in general Jimmy: obvs to eat, dickhead Jimmy: but if there's owt else I can do an' all, go on Janis: cheek that you don't wanna know all about my ambitions and dreams in the morning Janis: @ the gals with that relatable content Jimmy: I LITERALLY just said tell me so that's bollocks Janis: woe is me 😉 can't hear you over all my 😭 Jimmy: poor baby Janis: are you going to school today? Jimmy: are you? Janis: haven't got my uniform Jimmy: you can borrow my spare if that's the only thing putting you off Janis: school is always off-putting Janis: but didn't know if you were gonna go in to shut him up Jimmy: if it were that piss easy I might do Janis: yeah Janis: I'll come in, if you are Janis: I usually have mine in my bag but I left that at home when I went out last night, for some reason Jimmy: probably weren't planning on going, we still don't have to Janis: what do you want to do? Jimmy: if we don't go? Janis: well I meant are we going or not Janis: but go on Jimmy: whatever is the most #ultimategoals bollocks we can think of, duh Janis: do you reckon any of them have heard of bed peace Janis: 😴😴😴 Jimmy: will have once I'm done 📷🥇 Janis: you're gonna koala onto the side of me? Janis: you're basically scouse, yeah 😏 Jimmy: unless you fancy making another fort downstairs, been ages since the last one Janis: just say you want to babe Janis: I'll get started whilst you're taking him in Jimmy: only thinking of you 🦒 Janis: it's a bit of a squeeze Janis: stretched out rn though Jimmy: very subtle Jimmy: I won't hurry back Janis: 🥺🥺 Janis: fine Jimmy: make up your mind, girl Janis: you know what I want Janis: read my mind, boy Jimmy: I miss you an' all Janis: compared to the school run, I'm a delight, obvs Jimmy: but hang on, some of them yummy mummies really dress up so you've got a bit of competition Janis: you have fun with that then Jimmy: 🤞😁🤞 OBVS Janis: you're gross Janis: and I'm going back to bed Jimmy: actual 🤞 you don't 🤮 in my 🗑 Janis: I ain't even hungover Jimmy: 'cause I came and got you before you could get too off your head Janis: you act like you've never done it Jimmy: never said that Janis: What, then? Jimmy: nowt 🤐 Janis: why'd you come though Jimmy: what kind of question is that? Janis: why can't I ask? Jimmy: what's it matter? it's done now Janis: alright Jimmy: there's 🗨 you can read before I did Janis: that would require reading my own 🗨 Janis: I'd rather leave it 🤐 Jimmy: alright Janis: 👍 Janis: I'll take the dog out Jimmy: what happened to going back to 😴? Janis: I'm not sleepy Jimmy: tah then Janis: no worries Jimmy: 👍 Janis: it doesn't need to be weird Jimmy: what? Janis: ➡️ ⬅️ ⬆️ ⬇️ ↗️ ↘️ ↙️ ↖️ Janis: this Jimmy: you're the one calling it weird to say it don't need to be Janis: I'm just saying I don't wanna start up the whole thing again, that's all Jimmy: that's alright by me Janis: okay Janis: ignore me Jimmy: I don't want to ignore you Janis: okay, don't, but I mean Janis: I'm not trying to be a dick Jimmy: I'll give you a 🏆 if you manage it Jimmy: 😏 Janis: fair but fuck off 😂 Janis: not going for 😇 fake gf Jimmy: what you going for? Janis: 😈 DUH Jimmy: you can have that 🏆 Janis: I'd fight you if you disagreed on that Jimmy: no need as it's fake Jimmy: I'll agree to owt as long as it's on brand Janis: that ain't fake Jimmy: last night it were Jimmy: SO nice you 😇🏆🥇 Janis: that was mate stuff Janis: not fake gf Jimmy: let's just be mates today then Jimmy: I'm 🥱😴 if you're not Janis: subtle way to say just be nice to me all day Janis: but alright Jimmy: I'll do it back, not that much of a dickhead Janis: doesn't sound terrible Jimmy: 🤝? Janis: 🤝 Janis: and I could sleep, so don't need to worry about me creepily watching you and/or stealing all your shit whilst you 🥱😴 Jimmy: I ain't Jimmy: you've had loads of chances to do both before now Janis: gain your trust first, not an amateur Jimmy: and what, you reckon you have? Janis: yep Janis: like you said, could've easily done both by now Jimmy: 👌 Janis: oi, are you saying I haven't? Jimmy: I said I weren't bothered about you thieving or 👀 at us 😴 Jimmy: don't mean I trust you, mate, just that I've got nowt worth nicking and don't reckon I'm 🎨 Janis: Psh, that's a blatant lie Jimmy: which bit? Janis: not reckoning you're 🎨 Janis: you and your massive head Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: if that weren't bollocks I'd be my own muse Janis: selfies aren't #art Janis: that's the truth, pretentious hipster Jimmy: take one and watch the fans disagree Janis: you do the same Janis: you know what you look like Jimmy: [obviously does because no fucks given ever] Jimmy: there you go then Janis: see Janis: you're Janis: your DMs will 💥 'cos I'm not in it Jimmy: have to take loads with you in Jimmy: good job you're not hungover Janis: I've not seen myself yet Janis: could be 👹 Jimmy: 📷 Jimmy: it's your go Janis: [a bed selfie where you clearly look good 'cos when do you not, bitches be mad] Janis: demanding, you Jimmy: if I were next to you there I would be Janis: 😳 Janis: rude to say that and not be Jimmy: I thought it'd be ruder not to 🗨 soz Jimmy: taking our 🤝 dead serious, me Janis: speechless is a bit far Jimmy: Dunno you might reckon the nicest thing I can do is shut up Janis: nah Janis: I've told you loads I don't mind it Janis: your 🗨 Jimmy: [a voice memo that's full of compliments about that selfie because of course] Janis: I already missed you Janis: you had to make me admit it, didn't you Jimmy: weren't why but I'm not fuming that you feel the same as me Janis: you shouldn't be allowed out of this bed Janis: s'what I reckon Jimmy: we can stay there long as you want Janis: ⛓😍 Jimmy: be like Lucas is about Jimmy: no need to go to english Janis: yeah, smart to mouth off to your captor Janis: think on Jimmy: #thickandnorthern Jimmy: you have been warned before Janis: damn, I thought you said thicc Janis: misled Jimmy: 💔🎻😭 for you Janis: yeah, pretty gutted Janis: you'll do for now Jimmy: til you @ some fatter northern dickhead Janis: have to change my tinder location Jimmy: not much of a #kink since you ain't even offered to make me owt for breakfast Janis: those are perks you've not even fake unlocked Jimmy: or answered what you want Janis: surprise me Janis: I'll get you something on the way back with the dog Jimmy: already outted yourself as not a real feeder, no need to follow through on it Janis: you don't like surprises...? Jimmy: you heard that I don't trust you Janis: it's breakfast Jimmy: it were you who asked the question Janis: alright Janis: your loss Jimmy: I do like surprises from you, the 🎄🎁 were good Janis: You ain't bad either Janis: no 🎅 shithead Jimmy: 💕 Janis: dunno how I'm gonna top it Jimmy: got ages before you have to Jimmy: not expecting THAT 🥇 of a breakfast, like Janis: wait and 👀 boy Janis: 💪🏆 Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: I get it, you want me to have to compete with whatever 🍳🍞☕️🥞🧇🥓 I'm knocking up for you Janis: How else will you learn, babe? Janis: or maybe I just wanna do something nice, dickhead Jimmy: what's 🐕🏃 if not that? Janis: nothing new Janis: feel like that's all I friggin do Jimmy: who 🗨 it had to be something new? Jimmy: not 🥱😴 of you Janis: **because I keep you on your toes Jimmy: you're still about, that's all I want Janis: tah Janis: proximity is your biggest selling point as well Jimmy: 👏 @iantaylor8 for pissing about in this shithole instead of the one he was born in Janis: I'll @ my grandparents whilst I'm at it Jimmy: I meant you being at my 🏠 still but alright Jimmy: if they wanna take a bit of credit for that, you did say you didn't wanna go there Janis: already rude you have to split it 50/50 with your dad so Janis: not technically their fault, even if they'd hardly be happy I got pissed on a school day Jimmy: bit rude you didn't save me any tbh Jimmy: but not a surprise so I can't be fuming about it Janis: weren't my alcohol Janis: you could've hoe'd for it like the rest of us Jimmy: read the room a bit and they weren't chuffed to see me 💔🎻 Janis: awh babes Janis: 😞😘 Jimmy: your fault that you were, could've toned it down 🤏 and let me have some mates Janis: excuse me, you weren't hanging about to chat neither Jimmy: convenient that, you chucking the blame back over here Janis: you could've chucked me back if you were actually arsed Jimmy: might've been a good shout but I had a look and none of 'em were as fit as you Janis: now THAT'S a compliment Jimmy: take it then Janis: How can I? Janis: so overwhelmed you fancy me more than a bunch of greasy 16 year olds in tracksuits Jimmy: you're in the right place to have a lie down, you'll be alright Janis: OBVIOUSLY I prefer to swoon directly into your arms but Janis: have to do Janis: long as you reckon I'm dead when you get back and top yourself Janis: 😩🤤 Jimmy: Bill wouldn't have owt else Jimmy: trying to get this ☕☠ as we 🗨 him Janis: he's so thoughtful Janis: 💕 Jimmy: [bring her whatever adorable breakfast you've made before she gets out of bed because we know what this gal is like] Janis: [shamelessly giving you a massive smooch like you're gonna be gone forever] Jimmy: [it will feel like forever and we all know it, also shamelessly doing a little photoshoot so his dms don't blow up and obvs no other reason like she's the cutest ever] Janis: [so domestic, so cute] Jimmy: [the effort to tear himself away I lol you'll be right back sir] Janis: [and we all know you're not going to school so like, you have all day kids, god bless] Jimmy: [too in love] Janis: [bet Mia will make one of the gals dob you in] Jimmy: [she blatantly will, that snitch] Janis: [like get over it henny, why have you got nothing better on] Jimmy: [your jealousy and bitterness is simply not bringing us down rn hun] Janis: [we're already in trouble and don't care so like, what do you think you're achieving] Jimmy: [you're just annoying Grace even more than you already do gal, sadly she has not yet yeeted and we will have to endure the notp of her and Harry] Jimmy: [jimothy meanwhile is living his best life sending the bae pisstakey pics of these mums on the school run] Janis: ugh, put your tongue away Jimmy: @ the 🐕 Jimmy: nowt but 😎🖍 here Janis: well that was SO 🤓 so Janis: speak for yourself, not him Janis: dragging down his playground cred Jimmy: alright 😒🌧 then Janis: you'll get all the single mums that ain't learnt their lesson after you then Janis: sensible ones trying to tempt away the nice male teacher or one of the active dads Jimmy: #ultimatekinkunlocked Jimmy: Asia's mum Janis: She would Janis: you should, at least make Asia fuming Jimmy: see if I can convince her to 🔒 our kid's BFF in a cupboard or some bollocks an' all Jimmy: send her off to wherever the fuck she's named after Janis: must look up to the 💀💀s more that one Jimmy: must take after Asia with her 🧠 AND 🦷🦷 Janis: Poor little fuckers Jimmy: should have the full orchestra hanging about on this school run Janis: right? Janis: it's well depressing Jimmy: 💔 you ain't trained the 🐕 to take him to school for us Janis: soz she still needs a babysitter herself, like Janis: she'll be out of the puppy stage soon-ish and less of a handful but Nana is still a bit of a 💭 Jimmy: convenient excuses them, Janet Janis: 😒 Jimmy: *😏 Janis: I thought you were trained better than this, tbh Jimmy: said as you're having breakfast in bed Janis: you're saying I should be telling you how grateful I am rn? Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Janis: Hmm Jimmy: wind your 🦒 neck in Jimmy: I'm being nice Janis: Charming as ever 😂 Jimmy: [writes some v charming and extra post like there you go] Janis: it's gross yet impressive how fast you can turn it on Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt baby Jimmy: 💪🏆 Janis: post about how fast you can turn it on would seem a bit cheap rn Janis: I'll be more 💕 too I GUESS Janis: [post it bitch] Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: now give me what the 1st draft were Janis: [something way more 🔥] Jimmy: you been holding out on me this whole time or what? Janis: can't distract you from your duties/milf hunting Jimmy: you've just proved you can Janis: alright, shouldn't Jimmy: why? Janis: because you're having SUCH a good time already Janis: what kind of mate? Jimmy: a TOP one, duh Janis: you haven't been that nice Janis: 💔 Jimmy: how have I not? Janis: aforementioned milfs Janis: 🥺 Jimmy: Baby Jimmy: I'm sending those pisstaking 📷 of them but I'm looking at the ones of you Janis: Jealousy isn't cute, I get it Jimmy: whatever you do is cute, every dickhead gets that Janis: you're not every dickhead Janis: and I'm not that bitch Jimmy: and the kind of dickhead I am is alright with who you are Janis: ew Janis: 🤫🤫🤫 Jimmy: Oi Janis: we don't do mushy Jimmy: calm yourself down, I'll chuck a pillow at you in a bit or some bollocks Janis: I'll start an argument if you like Jimmy: has been AGES since the last one Janis: 👍 Janis: so much fun Jimmy: for Bill, I'd be chuffed to leave it out with the #drama Janis: unlucky Jimmy: for you, not being able to compete with Ian when it comes to having a strop Jimmy: I'll live Janis: fuck off Jimmy: this you starting the 🥊? Janis: you'd know if it was Janis: so no Jimmy: 👍 Janis: let's not Janis: I can't be arsed to go into school Jimmy: you know I don't wanna fight with you Janis: then we're not Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: I'm capable Jimmy: never said you weren't Janis: you don't need to when you keep calling me stroppy like I'm Libi's fucking age Jimmy: I'm only pissing about Jimmy: call me what you like Janis: not feeling the 🤤 now soz Jimmy: 💔 Janis: isn't it just Janis: me and the 🐕 are out, if you rush, the bed will still be warm-ish Jimmy: 🏃 Jimmy: how much food she nick off you? Janis: erm she had to wait patiently until I was done Jimmy: alright, bighead Janis: can't help being dominant Jimmy: send tweet Jimmy: I'll get one of the 🎻 to play for you Janis: for you Janis: 🥈 Jimmy: piss off Janis: 😏 Janis: ask Lucas, under me is EXACTLY where you wanna be, dickhead Jimmy: I'll @ him while I'm waiting for you Janis: better than the milfs Janis: he can't come 'round and seduce you Janis: #doubleenglishfirstperiod Jimmy: have to use his words Janis: if that's a hint Jimmy: for him that he can't half arse this just 'cause he's got one of Bill's classics to teach Janis: good luck Janis: he's way more touchy feely, despite the job title Jimmy: tah babe 😘 Janis: what's your angle Janis: besides being 2nd choice to me Jimmy: don't need one Jimmy: it's just that REAL between us, obvs Janis: 👌 Janis: what a nice change Jimmy: gotta have something to do when you're pissing about with this 🐕 Janis: thought you were 🥱😴? Jimmy: thought you promised me breakfast Janis: You can't nap and leave me to it? Janis: got loads of fantasies to be cracking on with, nothing else Jimmy: too excited, me Jimmy: you proper talked up how 🥇 it were gonna be a bit ago Janis: ✊💦 help you finish Janis: what a morning you're having Jimmy: don't keep you about for nowt Janis: aside from the fact I allegedly wouldn't go home Jimmy: it weren't like I were gonna make you Jimmy: or wanted to Janis: cheers Janis: if I was gonna argue with anyone Janis: better be you Janis: sorry Jimmy: we called a truce, you weren't allowed Janis: right Janis: be a bit rude to Jimmy: and you've got nowt to be sorry for Janis: I remember what we actually did Janis: so I know Jimmy: no hangover, not even that much of a pisshead in the first place, yeah I heard Janis: okay Janis: I know I was a bit Janis: not the end of the world Jimmy: not having a go Janis: thank god Jimmy: meant what I said Janis: what part? Jimmy: all of them Janis: nice and specific Janis: but okay Jimmy: alright, specifically not being a massive dickhead to you Jimmy: today at least Janis: don't worry Janis: you're never that bad Janis: not 🥇 anyway Jimmy: that's bollocks but sounds like 🥊🗨 an' all so I'll leave it out Janis: you reckon you're Ian levels of 🤬? Janis: nah Jimmy: there'd be a massive scale between him and me Jimmy: don't mean I weren't a twat to you before Janis: well you are a dickhead, don't need to apologize for who you are, like Janis: you're my mate, yeah Jimmy: your best mate, keep having to tell you Janis: I've still got the necklace Jimmy: be a bit rude if you'd chucked it Janis: don't just wear it when you're about Jimmy: don't just use my lighter when you are Janis: Your habit is pretty extensive Jimmy: 🚬's dead addictive, you not heard? Janis: 😱 Janis: and you let me have some Janis: wow Jimmy: not your daddy Jimmy: and it's a bit late for your growth to get stunted, Judith Janis: you're trying to make yourself feel tall Janis: that makes sense, Tom Jimmy: if I were bothered I'd chuck on a pair of 👠 Janis: or take a saw to mine Jimmy: I'll try not to go as far as fucking up your ankle again Jimmy: right ball ache that were Janis: why are you lying kathy Jimmy: Dunno what you mean Jimmy: ain't a 🪓 under this pillow or owt Jimmy: just me and my ⛓ how you're used to Janis: I'll come back then Janis: if you're promising no surprises Jimmy: [a pic of him snuggled in bed like see there's no danger] Janis: you're cute Jimmy: you Janis: I've got the evidence right in front of me so Jimmy: me an' all Jimmy: 👀📷 Janis: I'd take better ones but there's nothing very sexy about freezing my nips off Janis: you can, when I'm back Jimmy: warm you up a bit first Janis: you will Jimmy: can easily promise that Janis: It's not easy though Janis: you're just good Jimmy: never been a hard job, can't take all the credit for that Jimmy: 🤏 you an' all Jimmy: probably have to share the 🏆 at least Janis: alright Janis: we can drink from it Janis: toast to how easy it is Jimmy: long as Bill's 👻 don't try and take over like the proud dad he is Janis: ☠ later Jimmy: he'll have to wait til after I've 💀💀💀 you loads of other ways Janis: you first in that respect Janis: always Jimmy: them lads from that estate'll still be fuming about it Jimmy: swings'll be 🔥 Janis: was never gonna get drunk enough to do shit with them 🤷 Jimmy: not enough drinks in whatever shop they robbed for you to wanna bother, I get it Janis: obviously Janis: not the only girl to ever fuck them over like that, they'll survive Janis: least they can't accuse me of being frigid without sounding stupid now Jimmy: if anyone's still calling you that it'll be me that's fuming Jimmy: what more have I gotta do, like? Janis: 🍆📹 they wish Jimmy: come here then Janis: 😏 Jimmy: *🏃 Janis: I get it, you need both hands free Jimmy: dunno what's ruder, that you're not well trained enough to leg it to me when I click my fingers or that you reckon I don't already have a tripod set up Janis: right, you're a PROFESSIONAL pervert Janis: excuse me Jimmy: get it right Janis: get yourself to church Jimmy: hang on, I'll @ your shit nan, see if she can pick me up Janis: I'll stop 🏃 then Jimmy: or just 🏃 faster Janis: you think I want to fight my nan again Jimmy: didn't know it were a habit Janis: oh Janis: yeah, obvs Jimmy: alright, if it stops you trying to 🥊 with me Janis: bit selfish but Janis: 👌 Jimmy: never said I weren't Janis: I definitely am so not gonna say nothing Jimmy: already said I like you, not gonna risk 🗨 it again after how that went Janis: no accounting for taste Jimmy: 💔🎻 Jimmy: got time to dry my eyes before you get back Janis: just about Janis: but I know you, so don't worry too much Jimmy: Oi Janis: I like you too Jimmy: that's alright then Jimmy: no need to chuck you out Janis: you promised you'd warm me up first Jimmy: 'course I will Jimmy: not an utter bastard Janis: I know Janis: fuck knows why I like you Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: Bill's gonna do you a list, look less bigheaded coming from him Janis: 🤏 Janis: [come back now] Jimmy: [show her why she likes you with the most extra and enthusiastic welcome ever] Janis: [thank god everyone has gone so we can do what we like, even Twix be having her breakfast rn] Jimmy: [the actual freedom because that's never a thing for him] Janis: [true, when he's here the kids always are, live your best life honeys, not that you were being considerate last night but you know lol] Jimmy: [the feelings just keep getting higher, they can't be blamed or tamed, 100000000% gonna get in the shower together later and run up Ian's water bill too not soz] Janis: [hohaha you know he's the type to be fuming so we gotta] Jimmy: [he's gonna be so fuming when Janis leaves because you've skipped school again as well, not looking forward to that but for now, I'm buzzing for you both] Janis: [no, we're all worried about that, lowkey trying to never leave again but we know we have to soon, just like 🥺] Jimmy: [it's not gonna be nice, fuck you Ian, thank god things are going well for jj rn so if he kicks jimothy out in the cold or something post brawl at least we have the bae] Janis: [subtly moves self in so Ian can never kick off again, we know that that is eventually what's gonna happen but sadly not yet] Jimmy: [can't wait for that] Janis: [lowkey take over your house because what you gon do sir, look after your children? unlikely] Jimmy: [or out yourself as an actual utter bastard by kicking off, even more unlikely] Janis: [like you can be salty but if you even asked for rent or whatever to try and get her out she'd just pay it so soz] Jimmy: [so glad Janis has worked out what Ian is really like because it'd seem like he was making it up/ it wasn't as bad if she hadn't] Janis: [the injuries don't lie, and if he'd got them from scrapping or whatever he would've just said 'cos it's much less shameful so we know] Jimmy: [and soz but who would this soft boy be fighting you're not a massive slag giving him grief like his ex] Janis: [exactly, we already know he ain't that boy either so like, pretend all you like Ian, we see you] Jimmy: [not soz he's not actually Liam 2.0 and a mad lad] Janis: [you'll see eventually fam, anywhosers, do we wanna do any of their day or skip to when she's gotta think about leaving] Jimmy: [we can probably skip because we know the vibe when they're together] Janis: [when are you gonna think you've gotta leave hmm] Jimmy: [and am I making you go to work after school or not hmm] Janis: [that would make sense, if you go to work and you leave] Jimmy: [let's do that then why not] Jimmy: [probably go pick Bobby up from school first and maybe take him and Twix to the park or something for a bit because Cass gonna mad at you after last night so] Janis: [yeah, we can give you that time, he's primary so he probably gets out pretty early] Jimmy: you wanna come with me? Jimmy: do some ☕🎨 Janis: tempting offer, boy Janis: I DO need to perfect the 💕 for the BIG day Jimmy: for the fans who ain't 😎 enough for the smoke rings I taught you Janis: all of them? Jimmy: SHOOK that you've forgotten the dickheads who vape Jimmy: good to know you ain't getting me one of them for the BIG day Janis: I bet they have flavours that are well appropriate though Janis: all 🍓🍧🍨🧁🍭🍬🍫 Jimmy: gimme 👼🏽🩸 and 🥀 or I don't want it 💔 Janis: That's why you've invited me Janis: 🤞 I fuck up that bad Janis: who's first aid? Jimmy: Pete 😍🤤 Jimmy: had loads of 🩺 fantasies obvs Janis: UGH Janis: what can't he do Jimmy: NOWT Jimmy: 💪🏆🩹💕 Jimmy: need a 🤕 that looks chuffed to bits Janis: 🥴 with a bandage, deffo Janis: cannot wait for my third degree burns now Jimmy: they'll probably be about though Jimmy: 💀👑 and that Jimmy: so you'll have to fake that your 😍🤤 is @ me til they've pissed off Janis: oh, duh Janis: caffeine so needed after a long day of bitching about everyone Janis: I reckon I'll manage Jimmy: haven't had their IRL 👀 on us all day Jimmy: 💔🎻😭 Janis: You need the audience, yeah? Jimmy: they need the updates Jimmy: nowt to do with me Janis: hmm Janis: alright, hate to disappoint 'em, obvs Jimmy: make it worth your ⏲ with 🥪🍪🧁 if their 👀🔪🔪 don't Janis: just don't make yourself sick of me Jimmy: bit rude to be taking the piss out of my stamina Janis: you're rude Jimmy: how am I? Jimmy: been 🥇😇 all day Janis: exactly Jimmy: I just Jimmy: don't want you to 👋 yet Janis: Me either Janis: I'm coming Jimmy: okay Janis: I just feel a bit Janis: the hangover might've caught up with me Janis: easy on the 🍪🧁 Jimmy: I'll knock you up a smoothie Janis: so behind my 💪🏆 Jimmy: DUH Jimmy: you can sit in the back again an' all if you want Janis: that's okay Janis: gotta have all 👀s on us to make it count Jimmy: nowt makes 'em more fuming than what they can't 👀 all I'm 🗨 Jimmy: you don't need to worry about chucking them the 🍿 if you don't feel alright Janis: should teach them to lip read Janis: but don't Janis: I'm okay, honest Jimmy: [teaching her how to sign stuff for if she doesn't feel well that won't be obvious to the flatwhites cos lord knows some sign language really is] Janis: [doing some you've remembered from a previous sesh like look, I've learnt] Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: 😏 I know, so impressive Janis: Libi makes me practice with her Jimmy: without me having to @ her an' all Jimmy: must be 💕 Janis: DUH Janis: don't be acting like you haven't had your 👂 signed off Jimmy: it's alright, he's deffo gonna outdo me with his 🎨 and 🎁s Jimmy: probably keep it going the whole 2 weeks, him Jimmy: CLEARLY mutual Janis: Your influence Jimmy: except I dunno what I'm gonna get you that won't make you start a scale for it from 🙄 to 🤮 Janis: you don't have to get ME fuck all Janis: you only have to 1 up the basic 🎁 every lad does Jimmy: you'll be stuck with it, might as well sort out something that's not a load of shite Janis: 👍 Janis: I'll hit Bobby up for tips Jimmy: too soon for a 💍? Jimmy: he'd say it ain't Janis: 😂 Janis: gonna have to keep an 👀 on him Jimmy: least he's only got 😍 for Libi and don't take after me in being a massive slag Jimmy: be proposing to his whole class Janis: be well pricey if he's not reusing Jimmy: have to break into one of them machines once the shop is out of the sweet ones Janis: hoeing was meant to bring in the 💰 not lose it Janis: 💔 Jimmy: not gonna say you should give him tips Jimmy: still don't wanna 🥊 tah Janis: Not gonna break no baby hearts, so you're safe for now Jimmy: now I know you're feeling 🤢 Janis: you're gonna have to later Jimmy: what for? Janis: 🥊 Janis: not me Jimmy: I thought you meant 💔👶 Jimmy: not in the job description but alright Janis: 'course not Janis: be a weird rule to have at any of 'em Janis: ☕ or 💕 Jimmy: piss easy though Janis: that's not up for debate Janis: taking the 🍭🍬 is well known Jimmy: *🍪🧁 Jimmy: off you and them Janis: so tough Jimmy: stop flirting with me Jimmy: I won't wanna go Janis: you promised you'd teach me how to do the thing Jimmy: UGH fine Janis: I'll make it worth your while Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: come on Janis: you know me Jimmy: and you know I'm only pissing about, Jules Jimmy: VERY impressive, you Jimmy: said it before Janis: I'll get you to say it again Janis: one way or another Jimmy: you can't just say that like it's nowt and we're just gonna go crack on with ☕🎨 Janis: why not? Jimmy: you know why not Janis: 🥺 Jimmy: you're so Janis: that's you Jimmy: you Janis: you did such a good job on your first job Janis: you deserve to have a good shift Jimmy: it weren't a job today Janis: true Jimmy: I'll call in sick if you want, my nursing kink ain't gone nowhere Janis: No, no Janis: we'll have a good time Jimmy: can't deny that Janis: you can but I'm gonna do my best Jimmy: you'd know I were faking if I tried to bother Janis: let's not Janis: even if they're there Janis: we can still work it Jimmy: 🤝 Janis: 🤝 Jimmy: it still won't feel like a job, however hard work 💀👑 and her mates are Janis: neither of us need it Janis: they'll see 😍 regardless 'cos they want to Jimmy: right Jimmy: we've done our 💕 posts Janis: and it's not like I'll be ignoring you Jimmy: or that I can ever ignore you Janis: they don't know the difference Jimmy: 🧠💀💀💀 Janis: and you do 💀💀 me Janis: really Jimmy: you're killing me now Janis: sorry Janis: IOU Jimmy: when you feel less hungover Janis: I don't feel hungover Janis: I just miss you and I'm gonna miss you Jimmy: no need to miss me now and if you do in a bit I'll do the balcony scene 🌹 Jimmy: gone further to come get you and I didn't get lost Janis: it was VERY impressive, baby Jimmy: do alright under pressure Jimmy: @ my manager Janis: I'll put it on the trip advisor review Jimmy: tah Janis: I'll keep it PG Janis: or at the very least be vague about which barista I'm fucking Jimmy: I get it, this were nowt but a plan to get Pete's girlfriend to piss off Janis: 🤫🤫 Janis: worked SO hard on this plan, you ain't fucking it up for me Jimmy: 🤐 for now but he'll get it out of me Janis: great, now I've got to have a threesome with you 🙄 Jimmy: need a different eye rolling emoji for that Jimmy: get a bit closer to your actual review Janis: don't you dare make me 😳 in front of him Jimmy: it ain't my fault you're 😳 whenever I'm about Janis: psh Janis: whichever way you look at it that's clearly bollocks Jimmy: you're 🗨 bollocks denying it, mate Janis: shut up Jimmy: make me Janis: you're on Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: sorted our kid out now, I can do you before we have to go Janis: 1. no you can't 2. don't add me to your to-do list Jimmy: 1. yeah I can 2. you're top of every list, don't be a dickhead Janis: I want you too much Jimmy: so come here Jimmy: there's loads I can do about that Janis: [do that] Jimmy: [I'm just like do we want these kids to ruin this for you or no cos clearly both around] Janis: [when we're gonna be so rude later we're like ahh have everything lol, you probably would get cocklblocked though being real] Jimmy: [hence I was conflicted because Ian is gonna be a huge cunt and hurt you boy but realism though] Janis: [you can have an enjoyable time at the CG before we make you say goodbye it's okay, like it's not but] Jimmy: [we're doing what we can lads, you're welcome] Jimmy: [we can totally skip to then now if you like] Janis: [skippity doo dah] Jimmy: [do we wanna do any of the CG stuff is the question or fully go to later] Janis: [we could just vibe out how the gals are 'cos we already said Mia and co are being extra like skipping school is so shocking, then skip to when they have to say goodbye 'cos it'll be emosh] Jimmy: [that's a fair shout I think because yeah we know that they'll be goals without trying so it's just how Mia's trying to be] Janis: ['cos soon she's gonna literally get him fired so clearly she's gonna be a cow] Jimmy: [making complaints like a Karen when he's literally done nothing wrong, we see you] Janis: [she should be like IS THAT GIRL TRAINED when he's letting Janis do some latte art, as if they're giving anyone the ones she's making, so then they have to stop] Jimmy: [that's so petty she would, like gal we weren't gonna serve it to you we're just having a nice time while there is a lull in customers step back] Janis: [seriously, excuse us tryna have fun, like we still will but clearly that's the vibe, any time they try to do something she's like UM] Jimmy: [yeah and any time he tries to go remotely near the bae's table she suddenly needs something as if he's the only barista here] Janis: Can she be our second victim? Janis: 🔪🔪 Jimmy: first Jimmy: no need to hang about Janis: I'll clearly poison her 'cos I dunno how to make a latte Janis: whoops Jimmy: could let you loose with the steam wand Janis: her face just looks like that Jimmy: exactly, can't be traced back to you Janis: I don't want Pete to give me his disappointed face when he has to give her a bandage and write it in the accident book though Janis: 😥 Jimmy: I'll say it were me, piss easy to get his forgiveness 😘 Janis: rude Jimmy: it's alright, I know how to get yours an' all Janis: you do not Jimmy: 😏 Janis: dickhead Janis: meant to be focused on the murder anyway, you've got well off topic Jimmy: Oi, well decent at 🤹 now, me Janis: you need to work on your 🏃 clearly Jimmy: get my 🐕 trained and then we'll 🗨 Janis: am I even qualified? Jimmy: Depends Jimmy: can you get 💀👑 to behave herself or what? Janis: could give it a go Janis: what's in it for me though Jimmy: other than getting to rub her noise in her 🤮 next time she pisses off to the 🚽 how dickheads do when their 🐕s piss, you mean? Jimmy: what else do you want? Janis: save on you cleaning it up, you mean Janis: but alright Janis: [go over to the gals table like they haven't been actively being bitchy like HEY BABES WHAT'S UP] Jimmy: [comes over too like is there anything else you need and just being subtly but not subtly touchy feely with the bae while you're there to annoy Mia like what are you gonna do bitch make a complaint cos I'm playing with her hair] Janis: [getting y'all a massive cake or muffin or whatever that you would never order yourselves like our treat!] Jimmy: [LOL I love that, Hollie will be buzzing] Janis: [finally some food, just force feeding you like what are you gonna do, say no and look weird? I think not] Jimmy: 👍 Janis: worth it for the 😨😰 Janis: just collateral the ones that eat occasionally are getting fed but I'll cope Jimmy: do you want owt or have they made you lose your appetite? Jimmy: tell me so I can fake that I 🧠📖 Janis: I'll take a smoothie Janis: bonus points that I can brag about how talented you are or whatever Jimmy: and she can have a go that I ignored a load of dickheads to get it done for you Jimmy: they must be 👻s an' all Janis: since when was 💕a crime, Mia Janis: must've been dumped Jimmy: when I'm 45 and undercover 👮🚔 but that's our secret so Janis: She'd be far too into you then Janis: no escape Jimmy: [IRL 🤫 cos he looks hot doing it and then it looks like they are being saucy with their convo lol] Janis: [🤭 energy back but not exactly that obviously] Jimmy: [😏😍 energy that is not fake because I 100% assume she's wearing his clothes rn cos not been home and looking cute af] Jimmy: [definitely giving as many LOOKs as we can while we make this smoothie] Janis: [she definitely is so that's adorable and we never need to fake this energy lbr] Jimmy: [you've never had to fake much of anything we know and that's why this works] Janis: [mhmm, faking an interest in y'alls convo however? very much so] Janis: please tell me you're due a 🚬 soon Jimmy: manager ain't about to stop me Jimmy: bit busy with his 👂🩸 from all her whinging probably Janis: definitely better not go out back as it's staff only Jimmy: What?! 😱 you DON'T work here? Jimmy: top ☕🎨 like that! Janis: I know right?! Janis: #hiremegreg Jimmy: [writes her a review as if she do work here] Janis: pretty generous Jimmy: [shows her some pics of his early latte art like look how shit I was] Janis: awh, baby's first ☕🎨 Janis: only got a few years before your brother comes for this gig too Jimmy: 🤞 they'll have heard of coffee in the north by then Jimmy: he'll be 💔😭😭 else Janis: 😏 Janis: you're not emmerdale northern, I remember, can't fool me Jimmy: UGH fine Jimmy: real 🤞 he's stopped copying me ages before that Janis: you'll lose your ✨ Jimmy: ⏲ Jimmy: [give her this smoothie with today's 🎨 on the napkin and a kiss on the cheek] Janis: [insta that in front of the gals, obvs, just showing you all how cute we are] Janis: 🤞 I don't forget and wipe my face with that Jimmy: 🤞 I've got my 📷 out when you do Janis: I won't Janis: 🐘 memory Jimmy: 💔 you'd look well shakespearian with a pen beard Jimmy: Bill's gonna roll in his ⚰ at the missed chance Janis: I don't need to think about him that excited, tbh Jimmy: 👻🎻 Janis: you're the slag, you deal with it Jimmy: alright Jimmy: leave you with whatever you wanna 💭 about instead Janis: but Jimmy: ? Janis: what happened to our break? Jimmy: nowt, ready when you are Janis: [run away because we are over this girly chat like let's go] Jimmy: [you lasted longer than I would gal hence Jimothy will light you a 🚬 cos deserved] Janis: [you can dramatically breathe out like PHEW] Jimmy: [do your own because we all know what you're thinking about but we can pretend it's either a pisstake of hers or in solidarity] Janis: [reaching out to squeeze the hand that isn't holding his cigarette] Jimmy: [writing an o and a k on the back of hers but not establishing whether we're saying we are or asking if she is] Janis: [kissing the back of his] Jimmy: [kissing her dramatically because he cannot handle the softness rn] Janis: [we can go with that too] Jimmy: [just have a moment lads that's deserved too] Janis: [going in 'cos our emotions] Jimmy: [likewise because it's not like you care about all the people going past or that can see you inside] Janis: [keep going to say 'we-' and 'you-' like many times but never actually finishing either sentence 'cos you know he can't] Jimmy: [and don't talk to me about how tightly he's holding onto her because never mind this break not being long enough, this whole shift isn't and the goodbye and how evil I'm gonna be is looming over us] Janis: [gonna need someone to come through and break yous up we all know it] Jimmy: [thank god there's lots of possibilities for that cos of where you are] Janis: [someone else just tryna have their break lol] Jimmy: [soz but not] Janis: [truly] Janis: I'll brb Jimmy: Where you going? Janis: just need to get some stuff Jimmy: 🔪🪓🔧🔨🧱🧨🛢 I get it Janis: exactly Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: they should fuck off now 🤞 Jimmy: *🤞😁🤞 Janis: I'll do that whole way down the street, like Jimmy: 📷 it for us Jimmy: nowt else would do to make me 😁😁😁 Janis: ugh Janis: now I have to Jimmy: if you want a 🏆 or IOU Janis: [obviously we are] Jimmy: [have a lil reaction vid back as if we're not literally meant to be working because we're a nerd and in love] Janis: there we go Janis: all worth it now Janis: even though I looked like tiktok tammy Jimmy: 🦍🌃 Jimmy: you could NEVER Janis: compliment or diss? Jimmy: What kind of question is that? Janis: dunno Janis: 'cos if you're saying I can't dance like I'm having a seizure that's a lie Jimmy: you're gonna have to prove that now, you get that, yeah? Jimmy: walked right into making yourself look a twat Janis: you ask for any more 📷 and it's just gonna be weird Jimmy: alright, if you'd rather do it here in front of dickheads buying ☕ crack on Jimmy: I'll wait Janis: what about me doesn't scream 'loves an audience' Jimmy: what about me makes you reckon I'll be up for being your fake boyfriend after any of that bollocks? Jimmy: far as plans to dump me go Janis: you're the one asking me to do it, dickhead Janis: can't reverse psychology your way into getting to be the one doing the dumping Jimmy: you set yourself up, dickhead, nowt to do with me Janis: you could let it slide Janis: you already know I can dance Jimmy: I could Jimmy: you have got that IOU Janis: not what I'd use it for in an ideal world but Jimmy: might let you keep it and let it go an' all if I like the sound of what you would use it for Jimmy: am in a VERY 😁 mood now Janis: that'd be telling Janis: can't risk that 😁 Jimmy: go on Jimmy: you said it were in an ideal world, nowt but 😁 there Janis: but that ain't where any of us is Janis: so no point Jimmy: 🥺🥺🥺 Janis: yeah Janis: you weren't meant to stop 😁 Jimmy: doing my customer service face, it's as near Janis: if you're an alien who's never seen a person before Jimmy: busted 💔 Janis: 👮=👽 checks out Jimmy: bit racist of you but I get it, the north does look like something out of a shite sci fi film Jimmy: all them fuming orange lasses with nowt on 🤞 for 👽 Janis: bit up yourself Janis: but won't disagree Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Janis: maybe you should go back Janis: first, like Jimmy: what for? Janis: so your dad has to relocate Jimmy: might just still be about big enough for the both of us Janis: it might work Janis: if you keep doing a runner Jimmy: don't see that happening with 👶👶🐕 Janis: he'd get fed up of looking after them, right Jimmy: not leaving them with him long enough to find out Janis: okay Jimmy: or trusting Ian to work out where I'd gone even if I left a 💌 with a drawn out map Janis: he can't be that thick Jimmy: why can't he? Janis: it's impossible he's not heard what your sister wants Janis: ignoring it is another issue Jimmy: yeah Janis: anyway Jimmy: what he's too thick to work out is that she wants a person not a place Jimmy: that's how he reckons he can make it work here with his 🎁💰🐕 Janis: guess he can't give that anywhere Jimmy: he could give her her mates back who were there and know about it, instead of this bollocks where it only gets 🗨 for each new Sharon who comes about Janis: so tell her to do it Jimmy: what makes you think I can tell her to do owt Janis: it's what she wants to do, so help her do it so she doesn't fuck it up Jimmy: she's a kid, I'm not helping her piss off on her own Janis: not permanently Janis: just so he has to do something about it Jimmy: no Janis: alright Jimmy: it's not alright, what the fuck's wrong with you? Janis: she's 12, not 2 Janis: and you said she has friends, all it is is showing up on their doorstep unannounced and waiting for their parents to call Jimmy: she's my sister, not some dickhead I don't care about that I'd use to score points against him Janis: I didn't say you had to, it was just a suggestion Jimmy: leave it out Janis: I said alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: for fuck's sake Jimmy: what? Janis: forget it Jimmy: forget what? Janis: don't be a dick Jimmy: you started it Janis: by trying to help, sure Jimmy: I never asked for it Janis: nah, 'course not Jimmy: you don't know her Jimmy: and if she got it into her head to go looking for my mum instead of pissing about at a mates for a bit, fuck knows what'd happen Janis: like it's going to be easy to convince your dad to move back when he moved for a reason Jimmy: I'm not thick, alright Jimmy: I know how decent his job here is Janis: you either want to do something about it or you don't Janis: and you clearly don't so that's what forget it means Jimmy: stop having a go at me Jimmy: you clearly don't have a fucking clue about what I do or don't want Janis: this is pointless Jimmy: yeah, it is Janis: bye then Jimmy: 👋 Janis: I'll be over the road when you want your stuff back later Jimmy: it's nowt I need back in a bit Janis: then I'll leave it there Jimmy: 👌 Janis: [what do you wanna do like after he's gone home and dealt?] Jimmy: [I'll hit you back up because I was thinking injury wise like obvs it makes sense for them all to be hidden still because Ian is probs suss of Janis so like whatever healing his ribs have done they are probably fucked again but if it's lowkey that whole side of his body his wrist and arm would be an easy one for people to maybe notice at school but not think is a big deal because people hurt them all the time by putting them out when they fall etc and he can write with his other hand anyway but because we want some #drama and none of the bruises will be !! for a couple of days he could also have a dislocated shoulder as it's painful and shock factor for her to having to pop it back in but easy enough that she could without anyone else having to be involved] Jimmy: You still over the road or what? Janis: yes Janis: do you need to come in? Jimmy: come out Janis: ok Janis: [do that quickly 'cos we've clearly just been waiting] Jimmy: [I dread to think the state of this poor boy just trying not to cry outside mcvickers gaff like hey] Janis: [we're gonna be really shocked but pretending hard not to be like okay, just trying to survey the damage 'what do you need me to do?'] Jimmy: [show her your shoulder boy like nbd just casually pop this back into place because we're lowkey in shock here hence we told her to come outside even though you're gonna have to go in because you have to do this while he's lying on a bed you can't just do it here] Janis: [just gonna lead you inside without touching you or saying anything, just gesturing like come on 'it's okay' which is the furthest thing from the truth but what else can you say rn] Jimmy: [thank god you can trust her not only to do this but to not tell anyone because what a big ask when we're literally a month in] Janis: [lowkey, thank god you have a room here too, gonna rip your top off instead of trying to get it off 'cos impossible and bunching it in a way to make a decent gag because don't need to bite through your tongue or scream the house down, letting him get ready in that much and getting on the bed but not giving him loads of warning because best way to do it] Jimmy: [last we need is Libi or mcvickers rocking up and interrupting any of this so well played gal because he is not in a headspace to be helpful rn] Janis: [at least its one of those things where it's better once it's done so that'll be some minor relief for you, still, 'sorry' though 'cos it's fucking gnarly 'wait here' and going out to the bathroom, thank god they're old and probably have some decent painkillers, have to cross that bridge later when they think you've taken 'em for fun gal] Jimmy: [if he was thinking clearly he would not have come here because you already know too much gal and more importantly isn't not fair to make you do this when you're literally supposed to get xrays and shit first but here we are and you know he's saying sorry too and also trying to stop her from leaving even though she's literally just going too the bathroom and we realistically know that] Janis: [just keep telling him it's okay over and over 'we need to get you comfortable, okay? then we'll-' trail off 'cos we don't know and we know that's gonna be a journey to get there] Jimmy: [just nod because we know she's not wrong you do need those painkillers] Janis: [get as many of them down you as is safe boy, thanks for having a decent stash guys, also bandages we're gonna try to make use of now, taking his hand gently 'do you think any of the fingers are broken?'] Jimmy: [they gonna be suss about where all this has gone you're gonna have to lie convincingly gal, but for now we're just moving all our fingers by like messing about doing the signing alphabet and stuff like cos I'm gonna let you live and say they are okay] Janis: [sigh of relief like okay, we don't need to splint any of those, checking to see if he can bend his arm and how high he can etc before settling on splinting the whole forearm and then doing a sling 'he does realize you'll probably have to take more time off school now, where's the fucking sense in that' basically to ourselves and under our breath 'cos we know it's not logical and also not really about that] Jimmy: [didn't realise when you were having all that fun fake nursing each other that it would come to this, did you lads? ugh Ian, but jimothy is just getting ready to go when she's done this like okay thanks bye as if I'm just gonna let you walk out and go back to big brother duties and whatever else you're thinking about rn sir] Janis: [putting a hand out like stop 'you can't just go back'] Jimmy: ['I can't just stay here' like you literally can boy it's okay] Janis: '[just sit down, you need to give yourself chance to catch up'] Jimmy: [when you do sit down without arguing or saying anything pisstakey and it's so unlike him that we all hate it] Janis: [sit in silent shock for a sec guys 'you know you can't let him do this again' 'you will end up in hospital'] Jimmy: ['you're acting like there's owt else I can do that I've not'] Janis: ['that isn't what I'm saying' 'this isn't working, not any more'] Jimmy: ['What then, you still want me to tell Cass to crack on making him more fuming than I ever have done, knowing what he's like?] Janis: ['has he hit her?'] Jimmy: ['not yet'] Janis: ['you're gonna have to consider possibilities you don't like, you can't live like this'] Jimmy: ['there ain't a possibility I've not, I've been living like this for ages'] Janis: ['this isn't just discipline or whatever the fuck, it's assault and he knows that, wouldn't you be better off without him?'] Jimmy: ['where do you reckon we'd go? They're not better off without me'] Janis: ['I don't know, all I know is, he gives you any more injuries, neither of you will have any say who gets involved, okay'] Jimmy: ['he's got away with it this long'] Janis: ['well he isn't now'] Jimmy: ['I didn't come here for you to have another go at me'] Janis: ['I'm not'] Jimmy: ['nobody knows fuck all about it and that's the way it's staying'] Janis: [just shrugging like okay and getting up to go 'get some sleep' Jimmy: [likewise getting up to leave and actually go home this time like okay bye] Janis: ['next time this happens, don't come to me for help, because this isn't fair' 'because I do know and I'm not going to pretend I don't again'] Jimmy: ['I shouldn't have bothered coming this time' because we know it's not fair and we're just very sad and frustrated by life obvs 'do what you like' because lord knows we would if we could] Janis: ['I'm not going to tell anyone' 'but it has nothing to do with what I like, Jesus fucking Christ'] Jimmy: ['and I'm not saying tah for you not being a massive dickhead who'd proper fuck my little brother and sister over' a shrug but we're maintaining eye contact because this is serious] Janis: ['it's not about them' because it ain't Jimmy: ['you tell anyone and they'll get chucked into care same as I would'] Janis: ['remind him of that, not me'] Jimmy: ['you don't think I have done?'] Janis: ['there are ways to make it a more serious threat'] Jimmy: [just an exhausted sigh because he's doing everything he can always and it's not enough ever] Janis: ['think about it, the last thing he wants is people knowing, yeah? well I know'] Jimmy: ['might work for a bit, til he's too fuming to be bothered and just tells himself no dickhead'll believe you or owt else he needs to'] Janis: [just looks at him like there's all the evidence needed 'not like it's being made up though'] Jimmy: ['alright, it might be enough to get him to fuck off back to the north and get us away from you, but that don't help me'] Janis: ['except he doesn't want to go back, as is very fucking obvious by now, so it'd be easier for him to stop beating the shit out of you than do that'] Jimmy: [a look like yeah obviously but that doesn't mean he will] Janis: ['it's accountability, if he keeps doing it, I could tell anyone, everyone- he clearly reckons you won't by now, he doesn't know that about me'] Jimmy: [just clearly thinking about if she did have to then follow through on that threat though and tell everyone and how much he obviously doesn't want anyone to know and all of this is just in his expression rn] Janis: [shaking our head like well there's fuck all else to say rn 'get some sleep'] Jimmy: ['stop saying that' cos clearly neither of them will be able to very easily] Janis: ['you need it to heal'] Jimmy: ['just say you want me to piss off, you've already said not to bother coming back'] Janis: ['I'm trying to fucking help you'] Jimmy: ['I know' in a purely frustrated way but then repeating it in a soft way because we do know that] Janis: ['I don't know what else you want me to do'] Jimmy: ['I never said I knew what I were doing or what you should' this boy trying not to cry again over here] Janis: ['don't' but softly 'cos we've been trying not to cry this whole convo lowkey and we don't wanna do it now] Jimmy: [doing a feelsy lean with our good side because we want to hug her but we can't] Janis: ['I mean it' and moving away so he doesn't hurt himself, but not dramatically like get away] Jimmy: [a nod because we know and we appreciate everything she has done and is trying to do more than we can put into words without crying rn ' but I shouldn't have made you do that' a look at his shoulder 'I'm a dickhead'] Janis: [shrug like it's nothing, like I'm sure you've seen dislocated shoulders but doubt you were the one putting them back in but okay 'don't mean you deserve any of this'] Jimmy: [a look like don't because we know it's not nothing and we're really sorry about this now we're thinking clearer] Janis: ['you didn't have anywhere else to go'] Jimmy: ['that don't mean it were alright to come here and do this to you'] Janis: ['I'm not the one battered and bruised, I'm fine'] Jimmy: ['I'm used to that bollocks, it's having someone be bothered about it that I can't get my head round' when you aren't used to having people care about you ever so you always feel like you're fucking it up] Janis: ['be a pretty shit person if I didn't' 'so I can see the confusion' not really the time to be salty about that but we are] Jimmy: [a lol which we then regret because ouch] Janis: [tryna be serious like 'for fuck's sake' but a lil bit 😏] Jimmy: [when you wanna kiss her so much that you've simply got to, injuries be damned] Janis: [at least your face is purposely avoided so you'll be okay but you can't go in sad times for you 'I'm sorry' 'that you think I'm having a go at you'] Jimmy: [shaking his head because he genuinely doesn't think that 'I didn't mean that it were just -' no need to finish that because she knows what you mean, we've all been put through it tonight honey and we've already admitted we've been a dickhead] Janis: [nods because yeah 'I was never saying it was easy, I don't think that'] Jimmy: [also nods because yeah 'and I weren't saying it were a shit idea'] Janis: ['I just want-' not finishing that sentence like never mind 'anyway'] Jimmy: [all the eye contact because always 'what?'] Janis: ['I just want you to be alright' mumbling and not giving more than a second of eye contact like you haven't already said ily and that you care] Jimmy: [posing to show off the amazing job she's done bandaging him up and 😁 like I am alright now as if it's that simple] Janis: [just like mhmm like that is not what I mean and you know that but we don't need to get into it rn it's okay] Jimmy: [pull her even closer to you because we do know what she means and we appreciate it] Janis: [checking him like be careful please 'I'm sleeping on the floor' it's definitely a double but we don't wanna hurt him] Jimmy: [gestures at the bed like um look how much space there is compared to what we've used to 'no need for that'] Janis: ['could make a pillow wall' like people who hate their partners do lmao] Jimmy: ['that'll be Mia at every one of them sleepovers, cracking on just like her dad taught her' shading Ella and Mia's mum in one go lol] Janis: [we have to lol 'poor els, no 'accidental' rub ups for her'] Jimmy: [goes to do the 💔 but can only do half so has to force the bae to do the other bit for us] Janis: ['so tragic' and lowkey forcing him to get situated properly in this bed as comfortably as possible 'what are you gonna say happened then?' 'cos can't hide for the whole time it'd take to heal] Jimmy: ['weren't planning to do a q&a about it' cos he's honestly not thought about it yet with everything else he has been thinking about 'don't matter as long as nobody reckons you smacked me about'] Janis: [a look like who is going to think that? then rolling our eyes 'cos is the type of thing Mia would try to say lol 'well no one is going to think you got it playing a sport' cheeky bit of shade as we are looking in the wardrobe and under the bed for something] Jimmy: [chucking a pillow at her for the shade like oi 'I'll say I fell over or some bollocks, worked for my mum'] Janis: [making a noise like psh but we're not throwing that back 'you tryna prove you have aim? alright, I believe you' and coming back with the pillow and the sleeping bag we've retrieved to sleep in so we're not rolling all over] Jimmy: [a look like you know how good my aim is because any excuse to be saucy about anything especially when we're so upset about this whole sleeping situation but trying to downplay it] Janis: ['thank god you're ambidextrous' meant to be taking the piss out of him but it just sounds thirsty so we're loling] Jimmy: [😏 'you'll have to tweet that so the fans know'] Janis: ['the offers to fill in whilst you're injured would probably be a lot'] Jimmy: [😒 because we don't wanna think about that 'won't be a slaggy nurse's outfit left in this shithole once they've heard' because also true] Janis: [likewise 'gross' and shaking our head 'there's nothing sexy about hospital'] Jimmy: [a fed up sigh 'I can't be bothered with this' like it's an option to just not be injured, soz boy] Janis: [squeeze his non-injured hand like I know 'it'll be alright, we'll work it out'] Jimmy: ['can we not just fake going away like we were gonna do at new year's?' probably not boy but it's a nice thought] Janis: ['it'd be easier to actually go away' but a tone that's saying, that's how long it'd need to be, not suggesting it] Jimmy: ['let's do that then' as if that's remotely plausible in any way] Janis: ['are you concussed as well?' and moving our fingers about in front of him like follow but 😏 'cos we don't think he actually is obvs or we wouldn't be joking] Jimmy: [takes her hand and turns it into a 👍 like she's agreeing to his great idea 'wouldn't even have to be for that long' because we know he's not gonna do the 2 weeks off that you're meant to when you dislocate your shoulder because he never does what he's supposed to] Janis: ['where are we going then?' as we lay down ourselves] Jimmy: ['where do you wanna go?'] Janis: ['don't care' because we don't 'what about you?@'] Jimmy: ['what makes you think I care?' because likewise we don't] Janis: ['then just not here it is' turning to face him in our little sleeping bag 'assuming the pain pills don't wear off and you change your mind'] Jimmy: [a genuine smile at the prospect of getting to leave for a bit together even hypothetically tbh 'when they wear off you might change yours' and doing a 😒 af face] Janis: ['this is you being a delight, yeah?' and do a feelsy lean assuming we're sleeping on his good side 'cos makes sense] Jimmy: ['that were me doing an impression of you remembering what a nightmare I were last time we went away' because that skerries domestic when she tried to get him to sleep in a bed we all remember those joys] Janis: ['bit rude' like how dare you insinuated I'm ever grumpy lollolollll 'you'll be less trouble now you're fucked up' but a sad sigh 'cos its not funny though we're trying] Jimmy: [taking her hand again so you can write soz on it playfully but then just properly hold it because we heard that sad sigh and we are really soz in our heart] Janis: [doing the 👌 symbol which is probs hard to follow so then just doing a 💕 like] Jimmy: [doing an irl 🤝 because best friends forever] Janis: [then tucking him in like go to sleep nerd 'it'll be better in the morning'] Jimmy: [goes to say something because it won't be but we're deciding against it so she doesn't sad sigh again and closing our eyes instead] Janis: [gently lean over and kiss both his eyes] Jimmy: [not opening our eyes or anything but 'I really fucking like you' with feeling because he do] Janis: [got to kiss you on the lips with as much feeling 'cos we cannot trust ourselves to say anything rn] Jimmy: [have a moment because it's been a very dramatic night]

[tamiddyinyourcity]

3:06pm.

Suicidal thoughts, ENGAGE! :)

Thursday, June 18th of 2020.

Hey, yall.

Haven't written a forreal dated post in awhile.

Having a bad day.

Lets write things out.

Alright, whats going on for today:

I woke up, instantly thinking of him. I didn't wake up at 6am, but I did officially wake at 8:46am or something... Depression paralyzed me to bed. Not too fun, haha.

I had some dream where I was a mall cop/entertainer that was punished for not turning the local Mall Santa satanic to cause an amusing turmoil to the drama-and-pain loving followers of the cult inside of the mall. (My guess is that it symbolizes me not feeling like I got some sort of real revenge or feeling of power leaving Patrick, and unlike others who left me, there was no happy ending where I wreak havoc on them as others congratulate me for doing so.)

Weird symbolic dream, but still cool.... It also was designed to look like a Puppet Combo game, too. Huh. Odd.

Manifesting my ex to be hit by a bus and break their femur within 34 hours. Break their femur near their house. Within 34 hours. Hit by a bus. Broken femur.

Also, in my paralysis state, I realized I could only be content in life if Patrick were dead. Not to say I plan to kill him, but, if he were to die then I would care. Or if someone called me like, "Patrick is about to jump off his roof, come quick, talk him down", then I would show up. Do I hate a lot about him? Absolutely. Would I kick the shithead in his jaw and love to see his glasses fly off and hit the pavement? Maybe a little too fucking much to ever call me a sane human being. But sad thing is, if he ever did want to change, or talk, then I know I'd be the type of asshole to still pick up the phone.

Hell, I don't respect Marco whatsoever. But, I still give somewhat of a fuck about him. Somehow. He may be a dogshit human being that repeatedly cheated on the girl that loves him, all to put his chode inside of me and then immediately kick me out, (that prick,) and he likes to be a coward, loser, pessimist..... A shitty punk ass fuckface. God, Marco, you're such a slut, and I would force you to lick the pavement of a freshly shitted on San Francisco sidewalk with a grin on my face due to many more actions of you...... But, so far, opportunity hasn't arrived. And even if I have a very low opinion of him, I can at least go, "He's a dipshit, but he can be really good when the moment arises".

Like how when me and Matty broke up, (or moreso, Matty, hours after saying I was the only girl he wanted, romancey bullshit, dumped me the second his female best friend showed interest....) Marco was the one to drag the fuck outta Matty, and lecture him on the principle of "HEY, don't use women for sex, spin the idea that you love them and wanna be with them, then throw them out like hot garbage, ESPECIALLY when you KNOW she has trouble at home and was hoping to be protected by you in the way you promised her!"

........Marco may be a piece of shit, but I'll admit, I tear up to this day about that. He didn't even need to know the full terrible ass story. He just heard "I broke up with Tamia for JaLeah", and knew.

I don't respect him a lot, but that put him in a good place in my books.

Plus he's the designated fallback guy. Mainly because years of disrespect + him being called every name in the book hasnt gotten him to fuck off, since he also lacks self respect, and openly tells me I'm the hottest girl he's fucked.... (Flattered, lol,) = Marco clearly isn't gonna leave, taken or single, and will just keep trying to fuck me.

But he also will give me money for food, pay for Ubers, or do a phone call every once and awhile just to see that I am doing okay. He's such a jackass, but, you can't say he's not chivalrous before being a scumbag once we fuck. (Like the type of guy to put his jacket over a rainpuddle for a girl, and then will probably trip her into it once he gets what he wants from her.)

Potential to be a great guy. He doesn't really see it. And he refuses to let me ever tell him, without being a cock. Hence why he likes it better when I insult him or give him the toughest love possible..... It's what he's used to from his abusive family, I guess. :/

Anyway, feeling better now that I write this.

I also blocked Kieran today.

I try not to block people if they're being distant. But, its still an ego thing.

I stopped doing that after several moments with Patrick.

When I almost blocked him before we ever met for being a huge dry texter.... Luckily, I did not block him. I simply was half asleep, so I decided to send him a meme about peeing in rectums captioned "this could be us, but you don't reply to my texts", and went to bed....

Surprisingly, that had worked???????? He was just kinda like "oh are you hitting on me? i thought we were already doing that". Bada bing, bada boom, we ended up dating.

And then incident two, of course, where I blocked him after that cemetary hangout or whatever..... I could tell it was lingering guilt, and a crush, when a week passed between cutting off him and Mari, (a stank ass bitch,) and alas...... I missed him a lot, sadly.

So then of course, called him up. He agreed to meet me. Awkward apology and rekindling of friendship. Him being ridiculously confused as to why I was so annoyed at the cemetery, me admitting my Asuka-esque feelings for him.... And bada bing bada boom, we had started dating again!

So, I didn't wanna block Kieran.

Buuuut I can tell when I'm more into a person than they are actually into me.

We seemed to have a lot in common; NB related stuff, political "kill and eat the rich" mindsets, good shit.

I don't know.

It's like..... you never know when something is overreacting or not.

Or when a situation can either be "i shouldn't have said that", or "i did what was right".

Since I should've left Patrick at the first signs of him:

Lying to me.

Being overly suspicious and openly hiding the truth from me.

Perversion.

Cowardice. (Getting spat on, and the lying yet again...)

Me openly discussing how a situation negatively impacts me, (especially when shit like lying or inability to communicate fucked with my physical health terribly,) and him dismissing it as not his problem, so, not his worry. (That's why he gets left on read on Tinder and dresses like shit.)

Shit like that is why he got aired out on Twitter, with his ungrateful and unthoughtful ass. A bitchass fuckin loser. Gosh. FUCK.

I'm alright.

Gonna relax my face muscles.

:)

3:53pm.

So anyway, I just unblocked Kieran.

Stupid ass.

Well..... I don't know.

I saw this meme and it had made me reconsider.

...........

I just need time for the steam to blow off.

They seem neat, buuuuut yknow.

I'm not the absolute best at rejection. (Or I could be, if niggas didn't have me waiting 4 days or more just to hear if its reciprocated or not.... come on hoe, dont give me problems today.)

....

It started off okay. I eventually got too many panic attacks over the idea of hiding my feelings, told them.... it had went well.

We talked a lot more, aaaand it went pretty nicely.

Learned a lot about em.

But eh.

Shit kept falling off......

Just unblocking them and not dealing with them. No energy for blocking since I feel too guilty, but, no waiting up either.

.....

Plus, some other dude with nice eyes hit me up, so I'll live.

4:23pm. Alright, gonna do a feet pic live to make some money for sushi for the week.

Peace yalls.

[starry-eyed-skz]

Jisung and Jiwoo Han ~ The Twins Epilogue : Pride and Joy

Haha wow, we've reached the very final of The Twins! Thank you to those of you who have read this story, and I hope you enjoyed the chapters. I would also like to say happy birthday to our one and only Jisungie, I can't believe he's 19 now 😫 Anyways, enough talking. Let's get into this epilogue!

Bold = memories, beginning & ending of chapter | Italics = thoughts

prev | epilogue

-----------------

~~~Jiwoo’s POV~~~

“Jisung!” A loud squeal leaves my mouth as my twin brother picks me up bridal style out of my bed. "Put me down you jackass!" I smack my hand against his chest, him just rolling his eyes with a smile on his face. "Stop flailing or I'll fucking drop you." Jisung's laugh is still so relieving to hear, keeping my heart at ease. I pout and just lean my head on Jisung's chest. My body instinctively leans in closer to him as he starts walking down the stairs, not wanting to fall.

"You're fine JiJi, I'm not gonna drop you." His tone is teasing, making me send a slight glare up at him. I don't know why I'm even surprised, he does this every damn morning. I'm ripped out of my thoughts when I'm thrown on the couch, whines of annoyance coming from me and two others. Jeongin and Minho. "Jisung how dare you make me hurt my son?" I sit up hastily and wrap my arms around Jeongin, pulling his head towards me. "Excuse me," Minho's face is that of faux annoyance as the words leave his mouth, "I got hurt too!"

"Yeah but you aren't my son." I reply sassily as I play with Jeongin's hair, seeing him send a smirk Minho's way. My eyes drift to the floor where Hyunjin, Seungmin and Felix are sat playing Mario Kart on the big tv, their playful competitiveness making me smile fondly. Changbin is curled up on the chair next to the couch, just barely staying awake as he scrolls through his phone. Cute. Chan and Woojin aren't in the room, but judging from the aroma coming from the kitchen, they're making breakfast. In my half-asleep state, I had forgotten what today was, suddenly standing up and tackling Jisung in tight hug.

"Woah!" We almost tumble to the floor before Jisung catches himself against the wall. "Happy birthday doofus!" I yell in his ear and give him a cheeky grin. "If I could have one birthday without you making me temporarily deaf, that'd be fantastic." He says sarcastically but his smile gives him away. "Happy birthday to you too loser." His arms lazily wrap around me and he rests his chin on my shoulder, laughing as Felix loses the current round of Mario Kart. A sudden knock on the front door makes me peel myself away from Jisung and walk over to open it, a smile instantly taking over my face.

"Shua!" I immediately wrap my arms around his neck and nuzzle my face into his chest. "Hi baby.." Joshua's voice is so quiet and sweet, making my heart calm down from what happened earlier. "Close the door please, it's raining!" Woojin calls from the kitchen, a small giggle leaving me as I pull Joshua inside to close the door. Chan peeks his head out of the kitchen, smiling gently when he sees Joshua. "Sup, Hong." Josh gives a polite nod as I drag him to the living room where he greets everyone else that's out there, Woojin yelling a greeting from the kitchen.

"Happy birthday Jisung, you too baby." Joshua kisses my forehead and goes over to give my twin a hug, giving him one of his birthday punches in the process. Well that makes ten. A laugh leaves my mouth before I get one too, having both of us Han twins whining and rubbing our arms. "Sorry, you guys know the normal birthday traditions." Everyone laughs with Joshua while me and Jisung pout at each other. "Speaking of which, which member of your group is sitting out of their birthday punches this year?" Minho asks as he runs his hand through his silver hair. "Probably Jeonghan, I don't know. They were discussing it when I left."

"Wow, great to hear that the boys are fighting over who's gonna drive their fist into mine and Jisung's arms today." I roll my eyes but laugh a little, not surprised about it at all. "I swear Jihoon is going to break my arm one of these years.." I mumble and slump my shoulders, shuddering while remembering how much his birthday punches hurt. He really doesn't know when to go easy.

Later that night all 23 of us are at a reservation that was planned by Jeonghan and Woojin, so many stupid but memorable conversations taking place over dinner. The past two years have been part of a long healing process, which has been very successful. After the universe had turned on me and ripped away three years with the people I call my home, I had finally successfully got back to them. The first best moment since being home was sudden, but not unexpected..

Hyungwon's arrest:

~~September 20, 2019; Jiwoo's POV~~

"JiJi, come here now!" Jisung's yell reverberates off the walls, making me jump in my skin. I instantly spring up from my desk chair and run down the stairs into the living room. "What?! Who got hurt?!" I frantically yell, my eyes scanning the room. "No, no! Your dickbag kidnapper is on the news!" My heart stops in my chest, my feet moving quickly to sit down next to Jisung on the floor. The other eight boys run into the living room as soon as they heard Jisung's words.

We all watched in silence as the news reporter was explaining why Chae Hyungwon is being arrested. I become uneasy in my spot when I'm mentioned, twiddling with my fingers in my lap. "He is the confirmed kidnapper of Han Jiwoo, twin sister of Han Jisung of Stray Kids. The words from the man himself has lead to one of his many charges." The reporter on the screen is gone as the footage from the scene of his arrest is played full screen with audio.

"I will find her! None of you can fucking stop me! I'll have all of you pathetic wastes of space slaughtered before you even get the chance to put me away!!" He continues struggling against the officers, eventually ending up handcuffed and in the back of the police car. I can't help the dry laugh that passes between my lips as the policemen continue to restrain him to stop him moving or trying to escape.

That day had made me beyond relieved, knowing I'm completely safe from him now. I still have all my scars from the times Hyungwon had hurt me, but I just try not to pay attention to them. Jisung and I have been going to therapy together, working through our trauma and problems side by side. My train of thought is suddenly derailed as someone taps my shoulder, making me look at Vernon to my left who's looking at me in concern. "Hey, you okay?" I just nod at him with a genuine smile, my eyes turning into crescent shapes. "Perfectly fine Hansol, just thinking back on stuff."

He nods his head and once again everyone is engaged in conversation. All of us are extremely happy and comfortable in this very moment, it seems so serene and unreal. The night slowly comes to an end after Chan and Woojin's "happy 21st birthday" speech. Seungcheol pays for the meal and we part our respective ways.

Almost instantaneously when I'm in mine and Jisung's room, I'm peeling off my dress and replacing it with my much comfier pajamas. Jisung is near his bed doing the same with his dress pants and shirt, opting for sweatpants and a simple t-shirt. I turn around and give him a certain look before grabbing my phone, him knowing exactly what I'm doing. As if on instinct my finger taps on the Instagram icon and I look for a picture of Jisung to post, writing a quick but sweet caption. The only noise that fills the room is the sound of our fingers dancing across our screens.

Jisung finally looks up to meet my gaze after having stared at the side of his face for a little bit, ready to post them. We count down from three together, pressing 'post' at the exact same time as our posts now enter the ether.

I smile at Jisung as I finish reading his caption, no words being able to do any justice for how much I love and cherish my twin. He gets up and walks over to my bed, sitting down next to me and wrapping his arms securely around me. "I'm so happy you're here JiJi.." His voice is slightly muffled into my hair, but I still hear it nonetheless. "Me too Sungie, me too.." I wrap my arms around his, leaning into Jisung's warmth. "Hey Jisung?" My voice breaks our comfortable silence, making his eyes drift to me. "Yeah Jiwoo?"

"I'm proud to call you my twin brother."

~~~~THE END~~~~

I hope you all enjoyed this series! I had so much fun writing it and receiving everyone's feedback :) This is also my first completed book, so I'm proud I stuck with it! Thank you so much to those of you who truly loved my series as well as being patient in between chapters, it means sososo much to me!

Thank you for reading, and I'll see you all next post for another series or stand alone 😄😙

[imagodwithnodess]

Moving-Park Jisung

Genre: fluff

word count:1,600

Whhyyyyy!!???. You thought as you look at your dirty room. Today you have to pack to move out of your room. You currently live with your aunt as you wanted to go to an American boarding school In Korea, but your sister and her husband recently moved to Korea so you and she decided that It would be best for you to move In with her. As you all know each other better, and you missed each other dearly. You sit and look at your room and wonder how you are going to stay level-headed through this process. You call the only person you know that can help you through such a stressful sItuatIon.

(M=mark lee

Y=you)

Y: heeeeeey

M:.....what do you want

Y: I can't just text my best friend to check and see how he's doIng????? I'm Insulted!

M: 1. No...no you can't 2….well what do you need!

Y: ok so I need a strong man (or men) to help me with my room

M: your room? You're literally stronger then half the boys…..also that sounds more like you need help with organIzatIon...not strength.

Y: but maaaark

M: just…….text him already

Y: ok but no….we are playing a game. Whoever texts or calls fIrst loses….I ain't no loser.

M: call hIm...bye

Y: you're the worst

M: call your boyfriend!!!

Y: fIne!!!

You close your textIng app and go Into your call logs and begrudgIngly hIt the phone Icon.

“Heelloooo”

“Shut up”

“I knew you would call me today”

“Shut up,I know I didn't want to….but I realIzed I have too”

“ so babe what do you need?”

“I'm movIng today and I need help keeping a level head”

“Fear not my lady for I will help you”

“.........”

“.......”

“you are so lame omg haha”

“Ok but so are you so...ok I’ll be there In 10”

“Ok, love you bye”

“ yeah whatever I love you too bye”

You put away your phone and start a prIorIty lIst with what you need to deal with.

10 or 15 minutes later you hear a knock on your room door, “Come In!” you say towards the door. JIsung leans In “someone order a mental paperweIght??” he says making you laugh as you turn around and get off your seat and walk towards him “hello love,” you say as you kiss him. “ hI babe,” he says after you finished your kIss. “So! I have a list of things we need to do...so let's do them” “wow I have never seen you like this” he says as you walk away from the list and he picks It up to read It. “Like what?” you say as you start to pack up your bed set “ so effIcIent, so organized,” he says as he walks over to help you. “Well, I guess there has never been a need for It” you say as you shrug your shoulders “yeah I guess not,” he says slowing down on the last couple words.

You 2 work hard to get your room all packed up…..well 1 of you anyways. If you took a tImelapse of that day It would consist of:

You running around like a mother that's kids were down for a nap and she only had 30 minutes to clean the entire house

jIsung sIttIng and gettIng up every now and then

You guys dancing to music that we put on the speaker

Your aunt peakIng In the room sometImes

You guys pIllow fIghtIng, and clothes fIghtIng, and wrestlIng

And you guys face timing dIfferent people like your family, you guy’s friends, and of course the boys at the dorms

“Hey, babe you need help with that” jIsung asked you as he saw you about to pick up a chair/reclIner “nah I got It” you say with a smile that melts his heart. You pick the chaIr up with eas and take It to the living room. JIsung Is left dumbfounded In the room, as you come back Into the room he asks “ have you always been that strang?”, you laugh and nod your head yes “ yea, but I like seeing you be all gentlemen like and manly so I let you pick things up for me” you say as your working on packIng up your closet “huh” JIsung said as he got up to help.

2 hours had passed since the chaIr. “Im hungryyy” you said layIng on the bed”    “well do you guys have any food?” jIsung says layIng on the bed next to you proppIng himself up on his elbow “nah aunt ray hasn't gone shopping this week” you say as you turn over “well….thats all my Ideas out the window” you chuckle at how easily he gives up “oh! Oh!” you say getting excIted searching for something “ what gIrl? what Is It!?” he says like your a dog trying to tell hIm someone Is stuck In a well. You find your phone and look at hIm” pizza!!!” you say as you dive on him from the floor. You both laugh and you lay there for about 10 minutes not realIzIng what you set out to do.

You remember the pizza call the pizza place. JIsung has never heard you talk to a place of business so he sits up and sees how you handle It. “Your staring at me” you say as the phone Is rIngIng “sshh order the pizza” he says wavIng his hand In a ‘shoo’ motIon. You were about to speak when someone answers the phone. All jIsung here's Is you talk In your professIonal voIce. “Hi can I get one large cheese pizza please” you say In a voice jIsung does not recognIze. After you get off the phone jIsung Is starIng lovIngly at you “what?” you say laughing through your words.

“You just...contInue to surprise me” he says smIlIng. You blush slightly even tho you can't really see It consIderIng your complexIon. You both ate as soon as the food got there. You then packed up the last of your stuff and sat down on jisungs lap In the one seat left In the room and leaned your head on his shoulder.

“Thank you for helping me today love” you say as you nestle yourself deeper In his arms “no problem baby,” he says then kisses you on the top of your head.

As he is about to leave he looks at you “ babe I want to tell you something” “yees??” then he walks back over to you and grabs your hands. He then says something that you will never forget “Y/f/n y/l/n I love you so much, I know we haven't been together very long but I feel like I learn something new about you that makes me fall more In love with you every day” he says then kisses your forehead and stares into your eyes. You were dumbfounded at how sweet and loving this state Is and how It came out of nowhere. “ I honestly don't know what to say other then I love you too babe, more then.. A Lot of things...maybe even more than pizza” you say the word pizza In the most dramatic way you can think of “whaaaaaat????” he says being as dramatic as you. You laugh and contInue to sIt there until he has to leave.

He gets In his car driving off and honkIng as a goodbye from the car. You wave from the doorstep then go back In the house when you can no longer see him. You run Into your almost empty room and laid there think about how lucky you are. As your sister calls “haay giirl” she says “so how was your day with boo??” “omg I can't even right now” as you start your story about how much you love your boyfriend.

Jisungs pov

I get to the dorms and am greeted by all of my bandmates in the living room. I guess since it's our day off they all decided to come to the dream dorm. “Hi hyungs,” i say taking my shoes off at the door. I hear alot of sounds and i assume it's because i was just at y/n’s “i'm sorry” i say being confused but still wanting to be polite. “Soo, how was the girlfriend?” Lucas says i start to blush just thinking about her “i know that face, come here and tell us all about it” teayong says. I sit on the couch and start to talk about her. Hyungs have only met jahrra about 5 times, shes really shy around newer people, so shes only just been coming out of her shell the last 2 times. So they know her just not nearly as much i do.

I didn't realize it but as i talk about her more and more they got more intrigued and slowly but surely they were all listening and looking at me “shes just, perfect, everyone has there flaws but hers pail in comparison to everything else about her.” i finish finally zoning back in “AAHHH! Our little maknea is in love!” yuta says “it sounds like you got it bad too” mark says “i guess i do” i say as they al start making fun of me (in the fun older brother way)

y/n pov

“dang sis you got It bad,” she says laughing at how her little sister fell In love “yeah….I guess I do”. you didn't realize how whipped you too were for each other till right now. LIttle do you know jIsung was realized the same thing at the dorms. You 2? Truly, t r u l y In love.

[patchworkcrows]

You ever just feel like you've ruined your entire life already at 25 and like your goals are never going to get achieved and maybe all your friends mock you and think you're a moronic loser and you want to call your partners so badly to tell them you need to speak with them a bit and fall asleep on the phone with them to get through the night but you're scared they'll say no or it'll be a reason to leave you down the line and then you work up the courage to call the one who isn't sick with the flu but it goes to voicemail and you panic and think they could wake up tomorrow and think something happened and you just message them you're alive and okay and all about how you just wanted to talk for a bit even though it's almost 6 am here and really above everything else you just want your life to be fixed or to kill yourself and it's like every day is one step closer to just offing yourself already cause at least you can't keep failing and fucking things up if you're dead

Haha jk