#and generally this feels better for me. i'm not qualified or in the right position to dissect this stuff

[neometalpussy]

every day they find new ways to make me try and figure myself out. to understand myself. such is my plight i guess

[nartml]

To Pimp a Butterfly and 1989: a rant

Listen here, three things about me are that I'm a) white as snow, b) Greek, c) still a minor.

What does this mean? It means that I obviously wasn't raised with hip-hop, and I got into Kendrick Lamar's music pretty late.

As in, early this year.

I've known of him for some time, and the moment I found out he had a Pulitzer prize at some point in late-ish 2023, I decided I had to sit my ass down and pull out Spotify.

Now, as an avid reader of both fanfiction (ao3 raised me) and books [I feel the immense need to clarify that I don't associate myself with mainstream booktok. Capitalism's consumerism has overrun that shit and all I see are the same 20 books being recycled and recommended (a substantial amount of those are Colleen Hoover and her variants). Tropes and spice* are officially the defining factors of whether a book is worth it (*your porn addiction ain't cute) and quantity is heavily prioritized at the expense of quality. Also, diversity who?], I was, for a lack of a better word, hyped.

A Pulitzer prize is nothing to scoff at in general, more so in music, more so in hip-hop.

(Edit: Upon quick reflection, I realize that putting emphasis on hip-hop can come across as coded.

I am in no way, shape, or form trying to undermine hip-hop or say that it's somehow less 'sophisticated' than, for example, classical music. I'm very aware of the amount of skill and technique one needs to write a masterful hip-hop album, and I'm not doubting that there are hip-hop artists out there who are also incredibly deserving of such a prize. I meant it in the sense that I've unfortunately never heard of another hip-hop artist who won a Pulitzer before, which is quite telling.)

That's some huge shit, and I'd be a fool not to be intrigued.

Admittedly, I didn't get on that immediately. For a while I procrastinated, because I wasn't in the mood to hyper-fixate on anything new just yet.

Which of course meant I ended up forgetting about it for a few months, because of course I did.

But then I came across a TikTok that talked about how it was insane that '1989' won the Grammy when To Pimp a Butterfly was right there.

Now, a fourth thing about me is that I don't fuck with Taylor Swift.

And a fifth thing about me is that I'm not baseless in anything that I do, say or feel, and that includes annoyance.

Her immature understanding of activism and feminism leaves a bad taste in my mouth. The way she built up her fan base around this portrayal of her as a relatable girl's girl, her refusal to accept criticism, and always making a victim out of herself (even now when she's in her thirties and is a fucking billionaire) while never using her position of power and privilege for good are all reasons that serve to fuel my dispassionate dislike.

And before any Swifties get on my ass, no, I don't think that "But she's a singer! Why are you expecting so much out of her, she isn't even qualified to speak on XYZ—" is a good enough excuse.

She has always been rich, and now she's a billionaire. There are no ethical billionaires, and that includes her.

Fame is influence is power. Uncle Ben said it all: With great power comes great responsibility.

And let me tell you, I don't see her owning up to that responsibility, especially after all that talk about how she supports women, supports the LGBTQ community, and supports the BLM movement. Has she ever actually put her abundant money where her mouth is?

I've never seen her speak about anything that doesn't immediately concern her.

Don't get me wrong. She's not the only celebrity like this out there. I'm sure there are worse cases. I know it for a fact.

To wrap this segment up before I get even more sidetracked, I'll outright state that I don't hate her, because hating her would by definition mean that I, in some way, actually care about her, and that just sounds exhausting.

Best way to describe me is indifferent, leaning towards distasteful.

She's annoying.

And that's how I feel about both her as a person and her as an artist.

I'm not denying her talent, nor her impact on the industry, nor the fact that she does have good songs that even I like.

A select few, of course, but still.

Apart from those...what? Ten songs? I have never, ever been able to listen to any other song of her's all the way through.

I get bored. They do nothing for me. They sound empty. Hollow. Plastic. Repetitive.

Her lyrics, that are praised by fans for being deep and complex, sound pretty surface level to me.

Not all of them. But I'm a sucker for analysis. A literature nerd. Greek is my native language. I can tell when something's deep and when something wants to be deep.

(Not necessarily including Folklore and Evermore in that category. Her storytelling ability is actually great.)

Her music largely sounds like it wants to be deep.

Most recent example being her latest release, The Tortured Poets Department.

Anyway, back to Kendrick.

My initial plan was to listen to 'DAMN.' first, because that's what he won the Pulitzer for in the first place.

There was a change of plans after that TikTok.

I decided to compare the opening tacks.

I put on Welcome to New York, and predictably, I felt nothing.

The rhythm is dance-y, I suppose. But there's nothing substantial about it. There's nothing exciting about it.

The lyrics are juvenile, and I get it, it's a pop song and she was in her twenties.

Nobody is expecting Shakespeare (no matter how much you scream or kick your feet, the only reason Shakespeare couldn't write Taylor Swift is because he's in another league entirely) or Odysseus Elytis. Nobody is expecting mind-blowing lyricism.

But it's the opening track to an apparently Grammy-worthy album. The very least I'd expect from it would be some additional levels of artistry.

Am I being harsh? Probably. Do I care? No.

Disappointed but unsurprised, I put on Wesley's Theory.

I ascended within the first minute.

Don't get it twisted, I barely understood shit.

Not only am I white, I am also entirely removed from America and its culture as a whole. I don't know what's going on there in y'all's daily lives.

And this was baby's first proper introduction to hip-hop as a whole.

My untrained, white-ass ear barely caught two references. I got what the gist of the song was about, and that's about it.

I had to look up analyses of the track to fully grasp what Kendrick was on about, and even then, there was obviously still a disconnect.

And I expected all of that.

I didn't expect to get hooked on that song within the first listen.

I swear to fuck, the beat is addictive. I swear to fuck, even when I was fighting to understand what the lyrics were referencing, I was having the time of my life.

Even I, an amateur in every sense of the word, could tell that there was depth and there was quality and there was intentional meaning in every line of that song.

It didn't matter that I couldn't understand it. It mattered that I knew it was there. Not because someone told me that was the case. But because it was audible.

I listened to the next track. And the one after that. And the one after that. I had listened to all of the tracks, before I knew it.

And the evident permeance of quality, of substance, carried on throughout the whole album.

It had exactly the type of lyricism I'd expect a Grammy-worthy album to have. It had exactly the amount of artistry I expected a Grammy-worthy album to have.

Even better, it had all the ingredients I expected a timeless album to have.

The poetry Taylor Swift fans insist hides in her discography, I found in plain sight within Kendrick Lamar's.

After meticulously reading the lyrics, I watched video essay after video essay, searched for analysis after analysis on this album, each time understanding the meanings behind it a little better.

Needless to say that the Grammy's are rigged and I love Kendrick Lamar.

Hip-hop is gorgeous.

[tobiasdrake]

Are you officially gone from TV Tropes? Haven't seen you on any of the forum threads for a while now.

I pop in from time to time to lurk on some threads, but I'm not actively following things there the way I used to. I've been focusing a lot on Tumblr lately.

But I've always had less online time in general lately, as these last couple months have involved a substantial amount of adulting.

I'm finding I enjoy the format of Tumblr a lot better than internet forums. There's less pressure to respond to people here. I can shoot opinions out into the wild and people can take or leave them as they will, and then everyone just moves on.

In a forum, everybody's in one room vying to duke it out with whoever spoke last. Everything has to be such a debate. Everybody's always competing to prove how smart they are and how right their position on whether Batman can beat up Superman is.

And I just. I don't have the mental space for that anymore. I haven't for years. I'm in my late thirties now; I don't want to fistfight someone in the Denny's parking lot over Spider-Man movies.

And I'm also just so tired of long, drawn-out arguments with people who clearly aren't reading what I'm saying, and just respond to the general idea of my point that they've heard from others. Then make me out to be the bad guy because they've made it into an argument and dragged it out for pages on end.

"Ugggh, there goes Drake answering questions and clarifying misinterpretations of what he was saying again. Why does he always have to drone on and on about this every time people keep pushing the topic back onto him? Why won't he just drop the topic we keep responding to him about?"

TvTropes is an echo chamber governed by mob consensus. They like to say that they're just... pro-positivity towards media. "We are a website for celebrating media," is the pitch. Threads that exist purely to complain about a piece of media are forbidden and the general belief is that if a fan and a critic are arguing, the critic is always wrong.

But that's a lie, because the forum has plenty of complaining threads. The Sonyverse thread exists purely so everyone can shit on the Sonyverse and talk about how dumb Sony is for ever thinking these films could work. And also conspiracy theories about Venom's success being fake.

In actuality, TvTropes is governed by mob rule. The community has an opinion consensus about a piece of media, and if you disagree with the consensus then you're wrong. You're not supposed to talk shit about the MCU in the MCU thread but you're also not supposed to defend the Sonyverse in the Sonyverse thread, and either of these positions will incite the furious mob. It's an echo chamber.

For a long time now, it's become my policy on TvTropes to just say my piece and then fuck off and not respond to whoever gets uppity about it. Just fire off an opinion and then bail. Because I don't want to fistfight you in the Denny's parking lot, and if I actually respond to questions being asked then I put a target on my back.

And that's just. Not any fun for me. I didn't like the movie. Seven pages of screeching at me about it isn't going to make me like the movie. That's kind of the thing about media discourse? Even if you have the facts on your side, you're never going to change someone's mind by vanquishing them in the Arena of Logic.

No one has ever gone, "Oh, you're right, Black Widow's death technically does not qualify as Women in Refrigerators because she had agency in it. The scene is therefore good now. My qualms have been quelled and I will now defend this movie with my life." At the end of the day, we're just using words to describe how the thing made us feel. You might outmaneuver my words in a clash of verbal blades. But my feelings live on. You cannot slay them in semantic jousting.

And I've long given up on trying.

This is where Debate Bros will say "Well, my goal isn't to convince YOU but to convince ALL OF THE PEOPLE WATCHING US," as if sharing opinions on whether Batman can beat up Superman carries the same cultural gravitas as a Presidential Debate.

I use media discourse the way other people use fanfic. To express the feelings and ideas that are burning in my brain and need an outlet, need to go somewhere. On TvTropes, that always has to turn into a fight, because everyone in a forum environment has to have opinions about everyone else's opinions and we're all expected to civilly scream at each other until the mob consensus has been formed and the Official TvTropes Opinion is reached.

But on Tumblr, I can just throw my opinions out into the wild. And if people like them, they'll get Notes and maybe even start doing numbers. And if people don't, then they'll just be left to the void of forgotten statements. Either way, I can move on with my life after saying it, you can move on with your life after reading it or not read it at all, and we can all just go do something else.

That's basically how I try to use TvT these days, but on Tumblr that's actually the culture. It's what's expected. And so I find myself drawn more and more to the calming void of Tumblr over the combative civility of TvTropes.

[rmd-writes]

Hi!! I always love what you write, so I'm very excited to see whatever this secret project is! But for now I do have a question about beta reading. How did you break into it? For a long time I have thought that I would enjoy doing that for different people, and I like that kind of fine-tooth comb editing work. But I am not a writer myself, just an avid fic enjoyer, so it feels like I can't quite bring as much to the table or meet other authors in a mutual kind of way. And I would never want to imply that an author needed that extra help or anything like that by just cold reaching out to them. Sorry that so much about me haha, I'm not necessarily looking for any advice (though if you had any I would certainly take it) but I am curious about how you got into it and what your experience has been like! Thank you!!

Hi nonnie! Thanks for the ask!

Can I just say to start with, that as an avid fic enjoyer, you absolutely can meet writers and other creators in a mutual way! Everyone has a place in fandom and something to contribute. It would be a very lonely world for creators if people weren't there to enjoy what we make (and hopefully tell us what they're liking those things). Personally, I appreciate readers so much and I especially love seeing regular names pop up in my inbox 💖💖

As for how I got into beta reading, it started back when a pal in Schitt's Creek fandom was writing a fic and worried that she was going to lose motivation to write it so I offered to sit in the doc and cheer her on. Please note that my motivation for doing so was entirely selfish because it meant that I had early access to the fic that I desperately wanted her to keep writing 😅 that eventually turned into me beta reading that fic (and all of her fics after that) for her.

I started beta reading more frequently in RWRB - I'd signed up as a beta reader for an event, but around the same time I also got to know other writers via a discord server. Sometimes people would ask for beta readers and I'd volunteer - I'm still a tiny bit dirty that @three-drink-amy snagged the beta rights to bleedingballroomfloor's baseball boyfriends fic right out from under my nose even though she is far better qualified than I to beta read a baseball fic - so much so that she helped me with the baseball scenes in my rwrb lawyer au lol (please know that I love them both dearly, there is no internet beef here).

You say that you don't want to reach out to writers and imply that they need assistance, but honestly, sliding into people's DMs and letting them know that either I'm very interested in X fic that they're writing and would they like someone to beta read it or that I'm available in general to help if they want it because I love their writing is how I've ended up beta reading for almost all of the writers I do that for!! People are generally just thankful to know that someone is interested in their writing! It can be a lonely hobby sometimes and having someone to live in your docs or send snippets to can help balance the need for wanting to talk about your fics with someone or bounce ideas off someone and wanting to keep what you're working on under wraps.

God, this is getting really long, I'm so sorry. I've been rambling and I'm not even sure that I answered your question.

You asked what my experience has been like and for the most part, it's been very positive! I get early access to fics (I often say that my favourite way to read a fic is in google docs 😂), I get to cheer my friends on and sometimes they even trust me enough to let me throw ideas at them and write them into their stories - sometimes I even get to do this without actually doing any editing and that's just as fun. I love beta reading, I think there's something really special about being trusted with the draft of someone's writing and getting to help make it the best that it can be (what that involves looks different for every writer I work with). 💖

And all of that doesn't even touch on how much I learn from the writers I've worked with - it's definitely helped me improve my own writing!

[starlightfyre]

Thank you for answering my questions! It’s alright for not getting to them sooner, you’re not obligated to answer them, and I got the feeling that everything keeps trying to stop you from accessing your Tumblr haha.

You’ve clearly put a lot of thought and effort into building your world of Dracos, and I’m curious to know how dragons like Landia and Ice Dragon would fit in, if at all, since your world leans more towards anime lore than games. (Sorry if this question isn’t welcome, I’m going through a Kirby dragon world building phase of my own and want to poke the brain of another dragon enjoyer)

You would be right, haha! My devices and usual situations sometimes prevent me from checking Tumblr xD

I'm glad you asked! :D our AU draws a lot from the anime while fusing quite a bit of the games in. So I'll happily explain the wider lore of dragons! Dragons are some of the mightiest of beasts found in the Starlight Dreamers and Dreams of the Stars universe, and are often respected or feared. So any beast that falls under the species of "dragon" is treated with caution or high regard.

There's various kinds of dragons that fall under certain categories. I'll explain the category that ice dragons fall under first.

There are dragons that are demon beasts and/or monsters, which are dragons made or commonly used by Nightmare. Ice Dragons fall under the demon beast/monster category. Demon beasts are creatures that are usually made of negative energy, so most dragon species of this category are usually not nice! But you can come across some that are raised by good people or even Star Warriors as companions of war. Overall, ice dragons are neutral unless raised good or bad! A common name also used for demon beasts are Nightmares since they're often made of corrupted Dream Matter. So an ice dragon qualifies as a Nightmare Dragon. There are many other types of Nightmare Dragons as well, some worse and more evil than others!

Dracos fall under a category that is similar to demon beasts, interestingly enough! Except they're positive magical creatures made of Starlight and untainted Dream Matter. So holy/star beasts, I guess? Creatures that fall under these categories are called Dreams– a concept that belongs to my sister @blazingstaro (check out her stuff for more on the various species of Dreams outside of the Dracos!). So in contrast to Nightmare Dragons, Dracos are Dream Dragons. They're capable of traveling the stars and traversing the realm of sleep when they rest, as well as developing Super Abilities as they grow old. Dracos were born to combat Nightmares and were born in the image of their ancestors, the Origin Dragons, which I will explain after this. In their birth to the galaxy, they evolved and improve on the weaknesses that led to the near extinction of Origin Dragons to have better chances of survival. Because of their similar make to demon beasts, corrupted Dracos become Dracomares. So, a Draco CAN become a Nightmare Dragon.

Origin Dragons are the ancestors of which Dream and Nightmare Dragons were made. Origin Dragons are primal creatures of Dream Matter that were generally neutral depending on the individual. Unlike their Draco descendents, they couldn't traverse space, but were masters of elemental manipulation, such as mastery to cause storms, breathe fire, move earth, and other elemental powers! Landia in particular has lore significance. Eons ago, Landia ruled as kings over a dragon city long before the Dracos or Nightmares existed. The four siblings guarded the Master Crown until the day would come that it would be gifted to a worthy ruler who would lead the Champions of Starlight; wielders of four sacred blades made by the elements and blessing of four powerful dragons of that time (two of those blades being Galaxia and Galacta's lance). The Crown was stolen though, leading to it's misuse and eventual corruption. Landia was lost in an unknown space in that battle and the world was torn asunder, starting the decline of the Origin Dragon's near extinction. As seen, eventually the crown does end up back in their possession, but they guard it for the purpose of it not falling in the wrong hands until Magolor stumbles upon them.

Here's some art examples!

Landia, when split into four dragons, are actually kinda small xD they become large when fused! The sketch of one of the Landia dragons between two others is another Origin Dragon on the left (Athrodite) and a Draco on the right (Branwen. She's young here, but she grows up to be around Athrodite's size).

--

Here are examples of demon beast dragons/nightmare dragons. On the left is my stylization of Ice Dragons! On the right is one of the fiercest of nightmare dragons; the silver dragon, based on the dragons sometimes seen in the anime. This one in particular is my character, Cynder. Silver dragons breathe fire and are quite large, easily rivaling Origin Dragons in size! They don't speak but understand speech, so are highly more intelligent than they give off!

--

Some colored Origin Dragons! On the left is Azymondias, on the right is Elyna. She's the only dragon of her era to have manipulation over the element of space and Starlight and is rather important to the backbone of my story lore. She is thought to be the base of how Dracos work modernly! Azymondias is a storm dragon, and aided in raising and teaching Branwen. Both of these characters are no longer around.

--

And lastly, examples of powerful Dracos and Dracomares! The left is the Alpha Queen Draco. On the right Firush, a Dracomare. Dracos come in various body types that are close to Origin Dragons!

Dragons are an important part of the lore of our stories! Dream and Nightmare Dragons are what came after Origin Dragons. The four dragons that aided in the creation of the sacred blades are an interesting topic I plan to talk about at some point. But I hope you enjoyed this dive into our world's lore on dragons! The Dracos and Origin Dragons are very important in my stories, so I'll be sharing more about some of the those characters as my stories go on ^w^

[sally-mun]

OKAY GUYS I NEED TO RAMBLE ABOUT LOKI FOR A MINUTE BEFORE I CUT MY FUCKING HEAD OFF

Okay I've been losing my mind about this since last week, and with the new episode coming out tonight and SOMEONE still not up to date on episodes so I can have a proper nerd session (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE YOU FUCKER), I'm just going to explode here if y'all don't mind. I probably shouldn't have to say this, but obviously, SPOILERS AHEAD WATCH THE DAMN SERIES FIRST JUST DO IT

So I've had a lot to go off the deep end about now that this show is FINALLY fucking back, but the last episode ended on an extremely gnarly cliffhanger. To be specific, now that Miss Minutes is jilted and has decided to flip on He Who Remains, she cryptically mentions to Renslayer that she knows a pretty big secret about her, but if she tells her, it's going to make her really mad. Honestly, the main reason I find this so intriguing isn't just the inherent mystery of wanting to know what Miss Minutes is going to say; it's moreso just me wondering, what could POSSIBLY upset Renslayer any more than she already has been since the Time Keepers were outed as fakes? The stakes are already pretty fucking high, and from her POV she's got to forge ahead alone because no one else gets it and thus they won't help her. It'd have to be something MAJOR on a scale we haven't even approached yet to derail her from all that. So I brainstormed it in the shower a few days ago, because I get bored while having to wash my hair 82 times, and I had a VERY INTERESTING THOUGHT:

What if Renslayer is ALSO a Loki?

BECAUSE I MEAN... YEAH THAT'D MAKE HER PRETTY FUCKING MAD. RENSLAYER HATES LOKIS. SHE HATES THAT MOBIUS KEEPS CHOOSING TO TRUST AND WORK WITH OUR LOKI INSTEAD OF HER. SHE HATES THAT SYLVIE'S BEEN RUNNING AMOK AND CAUSING HER PROBLEMS FOR ALL THESE YEARS. RENSLAYER ABSOLUTELY CAN'T STAND LOKIS.

And unfortunately I IMMEDIATELY ruined this idea for myself because we know that Renslayer isn't a Loki. At the very end of season 1, B-15 lured some of the other hunters to Renslayer's place on the timeline to prove to them that they're all variants. We got to see for ourselves that Renslayer's just a normal person like the rest of us. She works in a school, and if I'm not mistaken she's the principal. Unless she lived in a VERY different version of Asgard, she's not a Loki.

BUT THAT'S WHY I FEEL LIKE I'M ABOUT TO COME APART AT THE SEAMS. At this point I don't care WHAT the new ep tonight is about to reveal, because I feel like finding out that Renslayer is also a Loki is SO MUCH BETTER than anything else they could possibly say at this point. Honestly, it would explain just about EVERYTHING we've seen so far -- about both Renslayer herself, and about the TVA in general. In her case, revealing that she's actually a Loki would go hand-in-hand with her attitude and habits. She enjoys her position of power and authority, even keeping trophies of her victories, and makes no secret about looking down on those she feels are beneath her. She unshakably believes that she NEEDS to be in charge in order for things to run properly, and that things fall apart without her. You might even say that Renslayer ruling the TVA makes life easier on everyone else... aka, EXACTLY the reason Loki's always given for wanting to rule Earth.

As for the TVA itself, I would've loved the idea that Lokis are just especially well-suited to work there, and that the majority of the staff there are Loki variants. That would explain why our Loki was so easy to recruit, and why he's been doing such a good job despite knowing the least of the main cast! What if Loki was right all along, and he IS "burdened with glorious purpose" -- and this is it? What if Loki has always been uniquely qualified to take on this responsibility? It's definitely a burden, it's definitely a purpose, and depending on his arrogance level he could definitely find glory in it. Lokis being the best candidates to handle this kind of burden could very well be WHY our Loki and Sylvie were chosen for the mantle by He Who Remains. As he pointed out during their discussion in S1E6, he paved the road for them. He made sure they'd make it to his citadel, because he wanted them.

Besides, it would make SO much sense for the majority of TVA employees to be Lokis because Mobius specifically points out that they pick up WAY more Loki variants than almost anyone else. That means they'd have a VERY, VERY LARGE POOL of potential recruits at any given time! It's also been proven that the staff's memories have been manipulated at least twice, so there's no reason for anyone to notice that they've accumulated so many Lokis over the years. There also wouldn't be much opportunity for them to accidentally find out, either, because we know that Loki's magic DOES NOT WORK AT THE TVA. The vast majority of TVA workers never leave there, so they'd have no chance of accidentally awakening any of their magic -- and those that do leave, such as the hunters, spend very little time actually down on the timeline. They show up, arrest the variant, set a reset charge, and get out. Even though they'd have the opportunity to accidentally perform some magic, it's very unlikely that it would've ever come up.

What makes me like the idea even more is that EVERY variant of Loki we've ever seen so far (minus Gator Loki, I suppose) has had black hair. That's one thing that has NEVER changed despite the circumstances; we haven't seen a ginger Loki, for example. All the Lokis we saw during the briefing in S1E2, and all the variants we saw in S1E5, have had black hair to the extent that we could actually see it. (Yes, this includes Sylvie, because we know her hair is dyed. In her flashback to when she was first arrested, she had long black hair.) You know who else has black hair? Almost ALL of the main characters that we know at the TVA! Renslayer, B-15, Casey, and OB all have black hair. Mobius' hair is white, but might it have been black back in the day? Who knows! It could have been! We don't know that it wasn't! And guess who else also has black hair? He Who Remains. Was he a Loki too? No idea! Maybe it's just a coincidence. Maybe it wasn't!

I don't know, I guess I'm just so stuck on this idea because it would just be SO frickin on-point with the very premise of the series. The idea of "what makes a Loki a Loki?" has already been explored a bit in S1E3, and this would be a great way to dial that discussion up to 11. If everyone turns out to be a Loki variant, well, now we have TONS of data on what it means to be a Loki! Plus, imagine the implications that has just for the TITLE of the show! We all thought it was called "Loki" because we're following the story of the Loki we've always known, but it'd have been an amazing reveal to show that it's moreso about Loki as a concept. The twist that the series name itself isn't necessarily about the protagonist would've been a pretty serious mindfuck to me!

I also like this idea because I've heard the complaint about the show that it, allegedly, really has very little to do with Loki in particular and is moreso about the TVA, with the argument that it could've been ANY Marvel character used as the protagonist. The complaint is that it only stars Loki because he has such a strong fan following and it's all just, effectively, fan service. Let me just say right now that I was never much of a fan of Loki as a character until this series, so I'm not campaigning for it out of personal preference. I've always genuinely believed that this show could only have worked with Loki as the protagonist, for reasons I'm not going to rant about in this post. My greater point is, revealing that the TVA is crawling with Lokis BECAUSE Lokis are the best ones for the job would just go to show that this series WAS always about him, and could ONLY have been about him. It would've been a great rebuttal to what Renslayer said to him in court in the first episode, when she told him "It's not your story, Mr. Laufeyson. It never was." Plot twist, it IS his story, and it ALWAYS was!

And it's KILLING ME that the series is undoubtedly NOT going in this direction and now I feel like I'm grieving the episodes we'll never have alskdjFLKSJE;KesKSJFDLSLEi I'm just imagining Renslayer finding out she's a Loki, being VERY UPSET ABOUT IT but eventually getting past it, and then rediscovering her skills with magic. How fucking cool would it have been to see Renslayer going full Norse God against our team?? What if she was especially proficient, to the extent that our Loki realizes he's outmatched? What if the other TVA characters had to rediscover their own lost magic skills, and the only way to succeed was to be their true selves -- to be Lokis -- so they could work together with their different magic specialties? What if that was how they got Sylvie to work with them again, because realizing that they're the same might instill a little bit of trust -- especially since learning to trust and see herself in others would be a step in fulfilling her character arc?

Siiiiggggghhhhh. One day in fanfiction, maybe.

[amysubmits]

do you have any thoughts on how things like Autism and ADHD can play a positive and/or negative role in relationships and sexual interactions especially in the BDSM D/s dynamic?

Hi :)

I have ADHD, we used to think CD also had ADHD as he was diagnosed with it previously, but we recently learned he was misdiagnosed.

We both have some autistic traits, but I don't think either of us likely qualify for the diagnosis. I find development really interesting so I've sort of been interested in learning about autism since I was in high school...but I don't know nearly as much as many other people. Anyway, I know some about both but I only really have experience with ADHD so this will be more ADHD focused and any of the autism stuff should be taken with a grain of salt.

Some positives that come to mind:

Clear communication. I think people with autism and/or ADHD both tend to be more literal and direct rather than speaking vaguely or in metaphors. I think there is a lot of benefit to having really clear communication in kink or d/s. It just lowers the risk of miscommunication and can increase intimacy which can be a really awesome thing, too.

ADHD can come with hyperfocus which can make BDSM or D/s experiences really enhanced if they're super locked in to the experience.

Passion. Whether it's hyperfocus in ADHD or special interests in autism, both groups can be really passionate about the things they are interested in. If one of those interests or fixations is BDSM or D/s, they can do a really great job of researching thoroughly and learning a lot, which can lead to better educated and ultimately safer interactions and relationships.

The ability to fully "unmask" can be really healing. I think the nature of BDSM and D/s can allow people to be more "themselves" than they might feel they can be in other relationships or situations. With kink not really being the most socially acceptable thing, by exploring kink, we're sort of rejecting some of society's expectations for us. Instead of asking what our relationships 'should' be like or what our bedroom play 'should' include, we can instead ask ourselves what we want and what is healthy for us and so on, and customize our relationships and intimate interactions based on those. And I think taking that same basic idea of...I'm going to set my goals and expectations based on what I actually want, what really works for me/us, etc - is a really good way to approach life in general when you have neurodivergence. Or if you don't, haha. But especially if you do! Cause we can't fit in the neurotypical box. I've found a lot of healing through d/s this last year. I should write about that!

Some mixed:

Almost everyone with autism (google says 90%), and around 40% of people with ADHD, also have sensory processing disorder. Which has pros and cons in my mind. Because on one hand, if someone is sensory seeking in certain ways, BDSM may be a great way to get the sensory input they like or need. On the other hand, people with sensory issues may have more sensory related hard limits or triggers that need to be worked around.

Some negatives:

Lots of people with ADHD (and I'd think maybe autism as well?) have regularly been criticized for their shortcomings. I think you'd be hard pressed to find someone who had ADHD as a kid, especially if it wasn't diagnosed young, but probably even if it was - who don't have insecurities that were caused by unfair/unreasonable criticism. Although most everyone knows about ADHD, it's still not well understood. I was diagnosed at 13 or 14 but have just started to really understand what ADHD looks like for me this past year! For a long time I thought I was misdiagnosed because my experiences didn't mirror examples of ADHD that I had always seen/heard. Anyway, I feel like most people think ADHD means being hyper and not paying attention to the teacher in school, and "...squirrel!" right? but not everyone with ADHD has hyperactivity and even those who have the hyperactive type, often have a lot of other types of symptoms that most people don't recognize as being ADHD symptoms. Like sensory issues, memory issues, difficulty with task initiation, other forms of executive function, rejection sensitive dysphoria, impulsivity. And due to that lack of understanding and sort of...ableism, I guess, I think a lot of ADHD people have wounds related to being treated as if we chose to do things poorly or were careless, even though we did our best. Most of us have experiences of being criticized as if we were making immoral choices, when in reality we had shortcomings that we couldn't overcome on our own. And when you grow up experiencing that a lot, it seeps into your view of yourself and makes you insecure and sensitive to criticism. If you have that sort of wound, it can make D/s challenging because accepting respectful criticism or critiques are part of d/s on both sides of the slash.

Most people with ADHD experience rejection-sensitive dysphoria, similar to what I stated above. But yeah this can make it hard to accept criticism and not get defensive or overly hurt, which can make being submissive tough in some situations.

With SPD, that sometimes includes auditory processing issues which can make verbal communication more challenging. This could potentially be dangerous if a sub says the safeword and the dom has auditory processing issues and doesn't immediately process/understand what was said. In other situations it may just make communication harder.

I'm sure there's lots more, but hope this is a decent start. I'd love to see people with ASD or ADHD or both comment with their experiences. :)

[wikaliyag]

hi, so i've become a tomgreg enthusiast just before the fourth season aired (i basically devoured the whole three seasons of succ in four days lmao). i don't really engage in social media and fandoms anymore but i would like to share my thoughts on the tomgreg relationship and the final season itself.

i would like to start with the fact that i was actually really surprised how explicit their relationship was in the first three seasons (in a way it still really is, but we'll get to that), since from what i knew about the show it was supposed to be something perfect for your 'normal' media consumer out there, just some business stuff, so with that logic i assumed it will be as heterosexual as it can get to not offend anyone (i mean homophobes). but the second tom and greg were together on the screen my brain materialised the 'i know what you are' dog meme and i loved it. it didn't feel superficial, it was something different, fresh and ugly and toxic and just real. seeing these two just be horrible to everyone (including each other) made sense and then seeing them finally lower their gourds down and care for only each other also made sense. so my main point is that it made a lot of sense for them to go with the dynamic and to just make it the way it is. i believe wholeheartedly that it is a genuine representation that i so desperately wanted, since i'm so done with all that 'gay ppl can't be horrible pieces of shit and have to be unnaturally perfect and good'. 

it isn’t as explicit as other queer relationships in media but that’s kinda what makes them so unique and fun to watch. they don’t have to kiss or to say ‘i love you’, cause we already have that confirmation through how they act towards each other. from ‘would you kiss me?’ first interaction to the ‘i will take care of you’ declaration, like he really didn’t have to do it, i believe he might have just been lonely in the roy kingdom and greg was the same, not in the inner circle but still a part of the family. that was the reason why he was so attracted to greg from the beginning. the nero and sporus speech, when tom decides to pour his whole heart into that speech and greg just responds with nothing, so tom awkwardly drops his smile, cause he thinks that he might be the only one that feels that way. (it was so fun to me cause for some reason i love to see tom suffer, idk why don’t ask me). but then greg immediately asks if tom is okay, cause he does care about tom and maybe he is just super oblivious to tom’s feelings at that point. in the fourth season greg allows tom to throw him under the bus during social interactions just for him to look better. he also is okay with tom treating him like shit throughout the whole show, even though he could have just leave him and try to suck up to his family more (as we can see in this season it is actually possible for greg to somehow have a working relationship with his cousins). i could give you so many more examples but we all get the point. it is not sexually explicit and it doesn’t have to, queer relationships are not only about sex or physical intimacy in general (though we still get all that patting on the back, stomach, shoulders ect., even all that whatever it was in the first ep from greg), it’s the emotional connection too. and we did get that. 

if it comes to the fourth season, i must admit that i agree with a lot of criticism. the characters feel really off to me. and i will focus on greg for a bit. this season he is suddenly gross and says stupid things, like he is a total imbecile that can’t think for himself (like i get it, he was always a little dumb dumb and ofc he can say gross things, it’s just that these are his only character trades right now, that’s the problem). he is definitely not qualified enough to be in a position that he is now but the greg from the second or third season would at least try to pinch some of his own ideas (even tho they are shitty) or maybe try to give his honest opinion on something, now he just goes ‘yeah it’s dope man’ and moves on. if it comes to tom i would say he is handled quite well, it might be because macfadyen is an absolute acting genius, but him being a total flop and trying so desperately to be on a good page with all the people that he betrayed makes sense. he is scared he is soon going to lose everything and it makes him do everything in his power to not let that happen, he is a total mess emotionally (and we love to see it). that includes coming back to shiv. even though he stood up for himself and i really wish he could just leave her and finally be happy alone, he has to be the a good and obedient husband once again, that’s his only way of saving himself. he says that he loves shiv for the money but i think there is also an actual unconditional love there, it’s just not a thing that she will understand, so he must speak in another language - a love for money and power. she then gets it and lets him in. but then you can see in a way that tom looks at her, that there is something more to it than the prestige of being married to a roy. 

and now the tomgreg relationship. we don’t see many scenes of them and yes it hurts a bit, since you wait a whole ass week for an episode and you don’t get much of their interactions but i saw someone saying that ‘they don’t need to show us tom and greg plotting together, cause we already know that. they focus on the dynamics of the relationships that are currently changing and tomgreg is as solid as a rock’ (obviously paraphrasing that one). i so agree with that, we don’t have to see them to know, it would be amazing to get more confirmation and just to see them both be all giggly middle aged men together but we already know where we stand. they have the deal, they work together behind the scenes, i bet that is exactly why in the sixth episode they went to an empty room, so that they can update each other on their secrety and confidential stuff. and why is greg gregging for ken and tom is suffocating himself in a toxic relationship with shiv? it’s simple, because it’s their plan to do so. they hope that at least one of the relationships will stick and save them from their doom. they will jump ships to whoever will be willing to not throw them away. this way it makes sense for us not to see them all that often together because we see them executing their plan, separately on camera but actually together. i hope that this will be addressed in the last four eps, it would be actually kinda fun to see maybe one of them or even both of them betray each other for their new friends/lovers to just be betrayed themselves and end up together anyway. it's what they deserve.

[multiplicity-positivity]

hi i'm kinda freaking out and idk what to do

so i've been a singlet ally my whole life right?

except for the past weeks (maybe months? idk) whenever i look in the mirror it does not feel like me. i just know it's not me, whoever i am. the person in the mirror is not what i look like.

but i....am still me? if that makes sense? my memories, feelings abt people, and thoughts in general are still very much like me.

TW FOR NEXT MINI PARAGRAPH: mentions of dpdr

side note: i am trans-genderfluid but this does not feel like my dysphoria does. i also have dpdr, but idk if that's it.

i'm just rly rly confused and panicking and would appreciate anything rly.

Hi! So we’re not a doctor or clinician by any means, but this absolutely sounds to us like depersonalization, which is a key symptom of DPDR. Our system made an infographic with our experiences with DPDR a while back, and we’ll link it here so you can take a look:

Struggling to recognize yourself, feeling like your reflection doesn’t really show who you are, being jarred or disturbed by seeing yourself in photos or the mirror… to us, all of this sounds like depersonalization.

So if you already know that you have DPDR, chances are, you’re probably going through a depersonalization episode when you have these feelings. Hopefully with time and through grounding and reorienting yourself these feelings can pass!

If you have a therapist, doctor, or mental healthcare provider, it may be well worth it to bring this up to them. They’re certainly more qualified to give better advice than we are, and they could likely help you more than we can!

We also experience DPDR, which is why we feel more or less confident about what you’re experiencing - because we experience something like this too, even when we’re 100% sure about who’s fronting!

Again, we’re not a clinician, so take our words with a grain of salt! We’re just a system who also experiences DPDR… and to us, it sounds like you’re experiencing some long-lasting depersonalization.

We hope things turn around for you soon! Or that at least you’re able to learn how to make the most of your situation. Good luck with everything!

🌸 Margo, 🖋 Cecil, and 🐢 Kip

[toyotacorolla2008]

hi!!! i was wondering if you could do a tutorial for how you draw transformers? i can never simplify them like you can. do you have any tips?? also love your art sm <33

hi ヾ(•ω•`)o

I WILL TRY MY best to explain what i do… i don’t actually have a very structured system but this is vaguely how i got started and how i simplified the process

1. look up and compile a whole bunch of references

this will be useful for EVERYTHING�� transfomos come with lots of shapes and gizmos and details and stuff so a variety of references from different angles and in different poses is really useful because you can see the shapes they’re made out of and also understand how everything connects with each other

trapezoid town! this is a mess but it’s a quick example of how by looking at everything you start to notice trends or details like what moves with what or how flexible some parts are

there are a whole bunch of resources very nice people have compiled on the web like here here here here and here (mainly MTMTE) and there is a discord server (this is a link to a tumblr post about it and not the invite link itself) for it too but you can always look through the source material and just start screenshotting and pasting shit into a folder. 

you don’t have to do humongous in-depth breakdowns if you just want to be able to quickly doodle robots (god knows i don’t!!) but having the references on-hand makes it easier for the times when you’re like This pose is going to be challenging and I’m not sure how all of the cuboids will be positioned.

references also help break you out of thinking of it as just drawing blockier humans because the proportions and shapes vary a looooooot

2. draw draw draw

at first i drew a lot using refs heavily to get an idea of the shapes then i got lazy and just started drawing anime girls and smacking rectangles and kibble on top BUT as you draw more and more you start to pick up on the Salient Features as well as their General Silhouette.

drawing from memory means that what makes them look recognisable will become more emphasised in your mind so you’ll naturally pick up on how you can simplify them without losing what makes your guy Look Like Your Guy. so if you want to simplify the robots just be incredibly lazy like me B)

i'm kind of horrible because i don't even do like Basic Shapes i literally just eyeball it

for poses i rectangle it out while thinking really hard

anyway when i first tried to draw transformers but Something Didn’t Look Right it was either a) the level of detail across the entire drawing was inconsistent and threw it off balance or b) proportions weren’t right and these things only got better with me finangling and doodling and learning by iteration.

of course sometimes i don’t give a fuck because no cops in transformers doodle land but yeahhhh i’m the kind of guy who only gets through stuff by throwing a lot of rocks at it. i don’t have a Method to offer you unfortunately but what i did do was

3. experiment and exaggerate and experiment!!

The First Rule of Gun Safety is to Have Fun and Be Yourself! i took a lot of liberties and rarely stayed on-model when i doodled and waffled around (and i still do…) but it helped me figure out how much i was willing to draw lol and consequently how i would stylise them.

i would play with how big or small or exaggerated or expressive they'd be… even my most detailed drawings are nowhere near comic-detail but my least detailed ones were. turquoise triangle that’s vaguely brainstorm-shaped. having fun with it and just doing it to make stupid jokes makes the practice seem like not practice.

so yeah tl;dr i started by reffing what bots actually look like, would trace comic panels to get an idea of the shapes and details and then start drawing side-by-side → drew billions of perceptors from my diseased mind and played around with lines → ??? → upgraded from goofy-looking rectangles to goofy-looking rectangles

that’s it for advice! (i don’t feel qualified to say that much)

below are just examples of stupid doodles i’d make on my ipad in class or in the margins of assignments lol, you can tell the last one is from when i still didn't understand brainstorm's build very well because the wings are placed wrongly... But i grew.

hope this was somewhat helpful! there are other tutorials from other artists that i can direct you to but this is how toyotacorolla2008 got to shitposting on tumblr dot com

[batmancomicanalysis]

Content creators/influencers can benefit from demoralising their audience

An example: right-wing influencers frequently claim that women are inherently depraved. What are the psychological consequences of this for their male followers? Greater misanthropy, frustration, sadism, masochism, social alienation, social isolation (which facilitates the formation of a parasocial relationship with the content creator), addiction, hopelessness and depression. Result: the content consumer is less likely to stop consuming the content and will tend to consume more of it, so more followers, engagements, ad revenue (from the website or other companies), sponsorship revenue, paid subscriptions, merch sales and donations for the creator, who may branch off into public or private speaking/meetings (this is aside from any sadistic non-material motives on the part of the content creator). Furthermore, the consumer spends more time online and thus more time consuming porn, which makes them even more demoralised and guilty as a by-product of their hypocrisy. Along with their increasing agreement with the often toxic positions of the content creator and personal radicalisation, guilt serves as an inducement to donate in order to diminish the feeling. And if the world is about to end or has ended then you have no future, which removes a psychological barrier to giving your money away.

If someone is a social media content creator they have a vested interest in you putting your time, energy and money into social media, so if they're narrowly self-interested (as merchants tend to be) then they probably want to keep you there, away from other avenues (if this sounds like the the description of an abusive cult then that may not be coincidental). They want their audience to be passive and feel they are accomplishing nothing (or at least nothing outside the creator), so that they are more likely to want to "compensate" by donating. "At least I'm supporting the cause in the way I can", "X is better qualified than me to fight the battle", "I've had a load of free content from X, it's only right" etc.

In so far as these influencers are able to demoralise their audience, they may also solicit donations from hostile state/corporate actors for this very purpose.

I'm confident that the same logic applies in many areas rather than just being specific to right wing influencers. For instance, pro-porn addiction accounts push the message that "you will always relapse". To donate a lot of your money to someone who doesn't even know you, you generally have to have very low self-esteem, so they work to generate and encourage despair and addiction.

[gayraccoonthing]

Okay, I just got back from my two day trip and LET ME TELL YOU, I'm not lying when I say that shit was fucking AMAZING!

(Small note, this is mostly about the LGBTQ rep there. There was a lot of awesome POC rep, too, but I don't feel qualified to talk about that.)

So, first, we went to the Minnesota zoo (pretty awesome ngl) and saw lots of cool animals and scenery (shit was expensive tho lmao).

Then I got to go to Barnes and nobles (fucking score) got some Adam silvera books and left for the science museum.

And when I tell you this museum was one of the best places I've ever been in, I MEAN IT.

Because HOLY SHIT, it was so welcoming and inclusive, and that's not even going into detail right now. (Images and positive rant under cut)

OKAY! I'll do my best to describe the pictures a bit. Let me go on this positive rant about the museum and it's LGBTQ inclusivity because OH MY GOD.

So, we explored the first floor exhibitions a bit before going off to the omni theater (think movie theater but with a big ass screen that's curved to give the illusion you're in the place it shows on screen, hella headache inducing but fun. Don't recommend it for those with light, sound, or just general sensitivity issues. If I wasn't sensory seeking, it'd be hell.) And the ads go on the screen (ads for the museum, not other companies) and this comes up!

It's hard to read, but I figured a visual may help.

The header at the top says, "Pride in STEM" the paragraph below states as following, "We celebrate the scientists creating a world that's inclusive instead of exclusive, diverse instead of uniform, and powered by the communities they hold. Together, we can make a better place for science itself. Learn more at 500queerscientists.com" and FUCK, if I didn't already love the museum enough.

We go through all the exhibits and floors, all extremely awesome and educational, very hands-on (lots of hand sanitizer too) the dinosaur section was awesome, I loved sportsology (I don't even like sports), the human body section was fascinating, seeing the natural life in Minnesota was so cool, the musical stairs were so fucking fun, the tugboat was amazing, and there's so much more I loved.

And then the giftshop. God damn I loved that gift shop. (What's that one meme? The tumblr post. The one with the three dragons, idk.) And I start to look through, and there's an LGBTQ section!!! It's small, but it's so much more than any other gift shop I've seen.

(Picture from far away, couldn't get too close because my mom) (also, no more images in this post from here on, just so you know)

I ended up getting some awesome enamel pins and a small magnet and cheap button pin. And in the pin display, there was a whole lgbtq section for pins!! I got this trans dopamine test tube pin (pray to God my mom didn't see, I had to get brave and ask the person myself, lmao) unfortunately I didn't get a picture of the pin display, but it was so fucking awesome to see.

The staff were all so nice, SO FUCKING NICE YOU HAVE NO IDEA.

but this one lady at the register for the gift shop, I swear, she's amazing. I walked up with my pins to pay, and she looks at me, and I see her protect trans kids pin and her she/her pronoun pin, and I don't think I've ever felt more safe and secure in my life. And she looks at my pins (either my aroace pin on my bag or my new trans pin, no idea) and says to me, "you're just like me, I don't see a lot of people like us here." In such a sweet voice, I swear to God I MELTED right then and there (not actually, but in my head I'm screaming with pure happiness) and she smiles at me the whole time, and I'm just so fucking happy!

And on my way out, this person almost walks into me, and they say, "Sorry there, son." And, OH. MY. GOD. SON!!!! They looked at me, this 5'4, not passing at all, long hair, fem faced, me, and called me son!!! It could have so easily been some mistake (probably was), but, God, it feels so damn nice to be called son by a stranger! The gender euphoria is real rn.

I genuinely love that museum so much. It fills me with life.

So, if you're ever in St. Paul MN and looking for a good museum I highly encourage you to go there. It's amazing and I love it.

[viiihouse]

"Darling, I know it's been a long time Since you've been satisfied I can tell by the look in your eyes You need it real bad You need it so bad, so bad

Baby, maybe if you're good girl I'll introduce you to my ride Don't you wanna come inside? Come on baby, I won't fly too fast, I've got so much class"

-Prince, International Lover

Another one of my favorite Prince songs. Particularly, one of my favorite sex songs by him (and in general). This song is a perfect demonstration of his genius when it comes to sexual metaphors and innuendo. I'm confident this man would have been able to liken sex to renovating a house and still make it erotic somehow had he still been alive today, and that's just one of the many things I love and appreciate about his artistry.

As soon as the song opens, before his vocals are even introduced, the backing track alone feels as though all inhibitions are slowly fading, as though the walls are slowly retracting between these two and we are entering a state of vulnerability.

"May I have this dance?"

This lyric establishes an isolation from the world around them. Quite literally, it paints a picture of a dance floor reserved for two. He only sees her and wants her to only see him in this moment.

"Darling, it appears to me That you could use a date tonight A body that'll do you right Tell me: am I qualified? Baby, I know it's hard to believe But this body here is free tonight Your very own first-class flight My plane's parked right outside, baby Don't you want to go for a ride?"

Maybe she's had some bad experiences, maybe she's picky about her partners, or maybe he simply feels she deserves better because he's so captivated by her. Either way, here he is promising her a night of passion with no strings attached, if she'll have him. Sincerely, her pleasure is his only priority and he doesn't want her to miss out on a positively beautiful experience that literally stands before her.

"I'm an international lover, yeah that's right Let me take you around the world I'll buy you diamonds and pearls Only if you're good girl"

The chorus promises her everything. This could be taken literally, but if we were to take this as another sexual expression, he's saying he'll do whatever she wants, whatever it takes, to please her sexually and, as illustrated in the third verse, is fully capable of doing so.

"Darling, I know it's been a long time Since you've been satisfied I can tell by the look in your eyes You need it real bad, you need It so bad, so bad Baby, maybe if you're good girl I'll introduce you to my ride Don't you want to come inside? Come on baby, I won't fly too fast, I've got so much class"

I highlighted this verse because I felt it encapsulated a vital theme in this song perfectly. Here, he expands on the first verse. Whatever the reason may be, she hasn't been satisfied in a long time and deep inside, she's desperate to be filled (emotionally or literally). He can see this in her eyes and probably from experience too. Gently, yet desperately himself, he pleads that he won't hurt her, he won't disappoint, he'd make it so good for her if she'd just accept his offer.

"Good evening. This is your pilot Prince speaking You are flying aboard the Seduction 747 And this plane is fully equipped with anything Your body desires If for any reason there is a loss in cabin pressure I will automatically drop down to apply more To activate the flow of excitement Extinguish all clothing materials and pull my body close to yours Place my lips over your mouth, and kiss, kiss, normally In the event there is overexcitement Your seat cushion may be used as a flotation device We ask that you please observe the "No Letting Go" sign I anticipate a few turbulence along the way We are now making our final approach to Satisfaction Please bring your lips, your arms, your hips Into the upped and locked position for landing Can you feel it? Can you feel it?"

My absolute favorite verse in this song and sexual Prince at his best, metaphorically speaking. This entire verse is the act of sex itself. I revel in his "announcement" every time I listen to this song, with all of its overt sexual innuendo, and find it quite clever that, true to his title as our pilot, he is guiding us through this sexual fantasy he's sending the listener off with as well. I'd especially like to direct your attention to the not-so-subtle allusion to them chasing their orgasm together in the last section. A powerful climax hits with that scream he belts out and the overflow of sexual pleasure follows soon after in the form of his vibrato. Brilliant.

"Welcome to Satisfaction Please remain awake until the aircraft Has come to a complete stop Thank you for flying Prince International Remember, next time you fly, fly the International Lover"

The outro depicts their afterglow literally and instrumentally, with both his vocals and the backing track coming down from their high and fading into a satisfying silence.

I really love this song because, while Prince has taken many different approaches to the topic of sex in his songs, I really appreciate how this song embodies sex itself. It's an entire sexual encounter that could be based in love or a simple one-night stand, but leaves everyone satisfied nonetheless either way.

As I briefly touched on with the intro, the composition really conveys a feeling of vulnerability, desperation, and desire. The desperation to sexually please is a familiar sound in Prince's songs and can be heard in songs like "Do Me Baby" from his Controversy album. It's quiet, yet passionate. His voice is the only thing filling that "silence" that hangs between the two as their sexual tension unfolds instrumentally.

His vocal prowess here is particularly exceptional, with this song being a popular example of his vocal range (especially for the time of its release) in his transitions from bass, to falsetto, and screaming throughout the song. His moaning, whining, panting, and fluctuations between seductive and pleading inflections convey his intense feelings to perfection, as though his sexual arousal seeping through every word is almost involuntary.

In addition to all there is to appreciate about the song itself, his live performances of this song are by far some of my favorites. His ad-libbed lines following the third verse like "Do you wanna kiss me, baby? Then stick your tongue out" or "I know where your G-spot is. You want me to show you?" along with his erotic shadow performance at the end only enhance the sexual experience that the song already offers.

There is much to appreciate about International Lover. From it's composition, instrumentals, vocals, and performance, it is truly a masterpiece among many in Prince's catalogue. The arousal and passion weaved into every facet of the song is infectious and easily invokes those feelings in its listener. The mood it carries of a sexual fantasy is also quite reminiscent of his later work, Space, for me. The 1999 era was definitely Prince in one of his top forms in my opinion, with the album featuring fantastic and unconventional numbers just like this one where the lyrics especially flourished. Many of my favorites belong to this album, but this song is definitely an all-time favorite.

[system-of-a-feather]

I do like this being brought up without the completely valid controversies around it and I'd like to have some thoughts put around as well so I'll put this on my blog with my opinion and invite others to do so.

I don't know if @ylva-vordr minds / their boundaries on it, but bad faith, aggressive and "debate / arguing" replies to my post will be ignored and likely blocked. I am open to discussion, not whatever goes on most of the time on here.

A) First, when do we think reducing stigma crosses the line into sensationalism* and romanticization*?  *Mildly modified words / spelling fixes

Honestly to me the moment occurs when the information is no longer serving a direct educational / illustrative purpose and instead moves solely to be entertaining, click bait, or - for lack of better words - a gimmick. If the content is either directly meant to be educational and not entertaining, that's good. If the content is meant to be about some random hobby they have while having DID, that is good. But if the content is "Someone with DID doing a Thing" then it starts falling into sensationalism and that is when I tend to have personal gripes on since DID is easy to sensationalize and use for clicks, attention, and monetization.

Showing switches can be educational if done right, but using it as "SWITCH CAUGHT ON CAMERA!!!!" and most of the tiktok DID trends and all just.... It's hard to put a firm line in the mud verbally / with words, but theres not really a need to draw focus on the "fantastical aspects" that while not innately "stigmatizing" and "negative" are already huge parts of the media-driven sensational stereotype people with DID have.

If that is how your system presents that's totally fair, cool, awesome and all - but is the video being posted "going about life and a switch occurs cause thats just how things are and this is a normal thing" or is it "Oh my God! I switched! Watch me CHANGE personalities!!!"

I think "Meet my alters" are innocent enough though I guess and are like the only exception of the top of my head to "DID focused 'entertainment' content" cause that inherently has a lot more educational / normalizing value than stuff like switching videos and all.

Not a huge thing i've directly parsed my line about so I'm open to feed back and questions and adjusting it, but generally I don't think you are reducing stigma as much as changing negative sensationality to "positive" sensationality when you make DID-focused Entertainment Content.

B) Under what circumstances do we think self-diagnosis is appropriate, and how can we assist those who have gone down that route? 

I think Self-Diagnosis is generally appropriate in any case where there is any reasonable reason someone can not get evaluated by and treated by a professional (financial, lack of qualified specialists, stigma, social environment, living situation, mental health conditions that make it difficult).

I think it is important to do good research in both peer communities where you can sit down with others who do have it and discuss it (not one way "peer communities" where the dynamic is parasocial / only acknowledged in a singular direction) as well as official and reputable diagnostic / research information.

There are thousands upon thousands of reasons why one might not be able to get diagnosed / treated so I am never the type to shun self diagnosis.

That said, I think its important for those that are self diagnosed to hold some space for the idea that they may be wrong, especially with DID / OSDD which can be hard to diagnose in general due to over lap in symptoms and similar appearances to other disorders which can be affected by dissociation and general egosyntonic symptoms that could hinder an individual as being an unbiased judge of themselves.

I think the "whatever you feel is always valid and true" while in good intentions and very helpful in some cases, it can be a very dangerous absolute to push because it backs people who might not be sure, who might not have the disorder but feel too deep in, into a corner where it is harder for them to authentically realize they are wrong and feel safe coming out that they were wrong (Which is TOTALLY fine!)

I also think for those that are self diagnosed and probably do have it / continue to think they have it / continue to have it and then get diagnosed, its important to just have open conversations on how things are in a non-sensationalized manner as to keep things open, normalized, and educational / helpful / productive. I think its important for those that find that the self diagnosis WORKS for them and helps them to be open to non-professional peer-to-peer notes on how to live and get by with it WITHOUT having all the sparkles and "OWO SWITCH CAUGHT ON CAMERA!" that serves more to an audience that doesn't have the disorder than those that do.

Anyways, these are just some of my loose thoughts on the matter. No real major claim. Interested to hearing other's additions.

Having watched the McLean Hospital video with regards to DID and a rise in self-diagnosis, there are some things I feel we should definitely be discussing. 

A) First, when do we think reducing stigma crosses the line into sensationalisation and romanisation? 

B) Under what circumstances do we think self-diagnosis is appropriate, and how can we assist those who have gone down that route? 

I do not, under any circumstances, condone the use of third party media as a way to prove a point, particularly without permission. 

[foreveranevilregal]

Felix finds out Pepa is bisexual

Oh, absolutely.

Some disclaimers: I'm not claiming this is canon or trying to make it canon. Just exploring an idea. Please keep in mind that they lived in a different time, so people's opinions might not necessarily line up with what we think today (but this is positive, I promise). And I myself am bi, so I feel qualified to write on the subject. Please be kind.

On with the show!

“I’m going to the market, I’ll be back soon.” Pepa leaned down to kiss Félix.

“Okay, mi vida.” Félix smiled, watching her as she walked away. He allowed his eyes to drift lower, appreciating some of her more generous assets.

“Gross, man, don’t check out my sister in front of me.” Bruno made his presence known, grimacing in disgust.

Félix chuckled. “Can’t help it, bro, she’s a real catch. Not my fault my smoking hot wife has a brother.”

“Can you not refer to my sister as ‘smoking hot’ in front of me?”

“What, you want me to lie?” Félix grinned.

Bruno squeezed his eyes shut. “I don’t want to be part of this conversation anymore.”

“Okay, okay.” Félix clapped a hand on his back. “But I just can’t believe how beautiful she is. I could just look at her all day.”

“Yeah, you and half the encanto,” Bruno muttered under his breath.

“What was that?”

“Nothing.”

“You definitely said something.” Félix frowned, confused.

“Uh…” Bruno scrambled for a response. “Just that it’s nice you and Pepa ended up together.”

“Hmm.” Félix sounded unconvinced.

“I didn’t think anyone would be able to tame her,” Bruno remarked.

“She’s definitely a spitfire,” Félix agreed.

“She dated so many people.”

“Eh, so did I. I had a lot of girlfriends back in the day, before Pepa stole my heart,” he dismissed with a wave of his hand.

“So did she,” Bruno blurted out without thinking.

Félix did a double take. “What?”

Bruno clamped his hand over his mouth, horrorstricken. “I said nothing, forget I said anything.”

“No, no, no, you can’t say something like that and pretend it didn’t happen.” Félix shook Bruno’s shoulders.

“Yeah I can, watch.” Bruno tried desperately to remedy the situation.

“Pepa’s had girlfriends?” Félix sputtered. “What??”

Bruno’s eyes widened. He rubbed his arm, panicking. “You didn’t know? Sorry, sorry. I thought you knew.” He averted his gaze. “Did she really not say anything?”

“This is the first I’m hearing of it.”

Bruno sucked in air through his teeth. “She’s going to kill me. Well, you were a good brother-in-law. Too bad my life’s going to be cut short.”

Félix ignored his histrionics. “So Pepa isn’t only into guys…” He mulled over the point. “Am I the last person to find out?”

“No, no, it was only me and Juli that knew. Well, us and the girls she dated.” Bruno winced. “I’m not making this any better. I’m sorry, Félix, don’t be mad. I really did think she told you. She’s your wife, she should have told you. And I’m still talking. Shut up, Bruno.”

“Hey, I’m not mad at you.” Félix threw an arm around his shoulder. “It’s just something I gotta process.” He exhaled loudly.

Bruno sighed in relief. “Don’t be mad at Pepa either,” he said with a wan smile. “It’s a lot for her to carry. People here aren’t exactly the most accepting of anyone who’s different. Trust me, I should know.” He laughed awkwardly. “Being the town weirdo and all.”

Félix nodded in acknowledgment, eyes wandering out towards where Pepa had disappeared. “I can’t believe she didn’t tell me.”

“Like I said, Julieta and I are the only ones who knew. And that’s because we grew up together. Pepa’s not exactly subtle about her feelings.”

“True enough. After I proposed to her, it was nothing but rainbows for a week.”

“Right. It was even worse when we were younger. Eventually, she learned how to hide it. She made us swear not to tell anyone because it’s not ours to share and I’m a dead man.” Bruno gulped.

“You’ll be okay, Bruno.” Félix was used to dramatic Madrigals by this point. He turned to walk back inside the house, needing time to think. “I should go get my chores done before dinner.”

“Okay.” Bruno shifted his weight from foot to foot guiltily. “And Félix? Pepa loves you, a lot.”

Félix looked at him strangely. “I know, Bruno. I love her too.” He walked inside, somewhat more subdued than before.

“Good. Because you two are really good together.” Bruno toyed with the hem of his ruana. He seemed to be pondering what to say next. “Now, at my funeral-”

“She’s not actually going to kill you,” Félix called through the door, waving away his fears.

“Let’s hope you’re right!”

Something felt off when she came home. Pepa couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but Félix didn’t kiss her back as enthusiastically as he normally did. And he was awfully quiet, which was very uncharacteristic of him.

“¿Estás bien, mi sol?” she asked, frowning.

He nodded, giving her a weary smile.

“Did something happen while I was gone?” She began putting away the food she had bought.

He opened his mouth to speak, then reconsidered and closed it again, shaking his head.

Pepa planted her hands on the counter, turning towards him. “What happened, Félix?”

“Later, mi vida.” He tried to deflect, to no avail. “After dinner.”

A cloud appeared over Pepa’s head. “What do you mean, later? If you have something to say, say it now.” Worries started swirling around her head. What had happened? Was something wrong? Why wouldn’t he just tell her? Her stomach twisted into knots as she considered possibilities, each worse than the last.

He walked over to her, rubbing her back soothingly. “No te preocupes, mi amor. There’s nothing to worry about, I promise.”

“If there’s nothing to worry about, then why won’t you just tell me what’s wrong?” Her voice came out shriller than she intended. She took a breath, closing her eyes to calm down. “I know you, Félix. Something is up. So come on and say it.”

He looked at her uncertainly before asking, “How was the market?”

“Fine,” Pepa replied brusquely. “Félix, what…”

“Did you see anyone interesting there?” he continued, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind and swaying her from side to side.

Pepa’s head lolled over her shoulder as she savored the affection. “Just the usual people.”

“Really? No ex-boyfriends?” he teased, pushing aside her braid to kiss her neck.

“Félix,” she whined, squirming around in his grasp. “Don’t be silly.”

He raised his mouth to her ear and whispered, “What about any ex-girlfriends?”

Pepa jumped into the air, squeaking. Did he say what she thought he said? Voice shaking, she asked, “What did you say?”

“I know you heard me, Pepa.” He was so calm. How was he so calm? Unless it was just pretend. And once he got her to confess, then he would…he would…

She staggered over to a chair, collapsing onto the seat just as her legs gave out. Her eyes were blown wide with fear as she tried to gauge her options. Finally, she decided to go with flat out denial. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. “

“I think you do, Pepa.”

She wished he wouldn’t be so calm about this. He should be furious. He should be yelling at her for lying to him (but she wanted to be with him so much, she didn’t want to risk telling him this and losing him over something out of her control. She loved him. She loved him so much and it felt like her heart was going to explode out of her chest-). But he wasn’t. He was just watching her, as she sat there, frozen in her chair, unable to talk.

“Pepa…”

Mortified, she threw her face into her hands as she began to cry profusely. Great. This was it. This was the part where he told her he was going to leave her. Now she was going to end up alone and lose the love of her life because she couldn’t be like everyone else. It would just be her and her cloud for the rest of her life. And to make matters worse, she could hear the rest of her family in the courtyard on their way back from town, cutting their conversation short.

He put his arms around her shoulders, squeezing her reassuringly. “This is why I wanted to talk later, amor,” he said quietly. “Let’s go upstairs.”

She let him slip his hand over hers and pull her out of her chair, guiding her upstairs to their room. She had stopped feeling, a numbness spreading through her limbs. Somehow, her body came to rest on their bed.

He lay down next to her, steeling himself for what had to be said.

Pepa turned on her side with her back to him. She couldn’t bear to look at him. Not when everything had fallen apart so spectacularly and he was going to leave her for being…the way she was. The sooner she got used to not having him near her constantly, the better. She fixed her eyes on the wall, focusing on the pattern of the wallpaper.

“Pepa, we should talk about this.” His words were quiet, devoid of any judgment. He put a hand on her shoulder.

As soon as she felt the touch, she shrugged it off. She didn’t deserve his affection, and she didn’t understand why he was toying with her. Why didn’t he just get it over with and say it?

“Say what?”

Horrified, she clapped a hand over her mouth. Had she said that out loud? Her breathing sped up as she fought to draw air into her lungs. Blinking back tears, she spoke to the wall instead of her husband. “Just say what I know you’re thinking. I’m awful, you don’t want to be with someone like me, and you’re going to leave me.” Choking back a sob, she buried her face in the sheets, letting them absorb her tears.

“Is that what you think of me?” Félix sounded…hurt? “You think I would do that to you?”

She pulled her face out of the sheets and turned to face him. “I don’t see why you wouldn’t,” she spat out bitterly. Wind blew the tears off her cheeks. She closed her eyes, hoping it would make the room stop spinning.

“Pepa…” He reached out for her hands.

She yanked them away, keeping them clutched to her chest. “Look, just say it. Say whatever it is you have to say and then let me move on in peace.”

“Move on? Are you leaving me?” He sounded so genuinely baffled that it brought a smile to Pepa’s face.

“Why would I do something stupid like that?" she scoffed. "You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I would never leave you.”

“And I won’t ever leave you either. I seem to remember some wedding vows that were exchanged saying ‘till death do us part’.” He brushed tear dampened bangs out of her eyes. “I took them seriously.”

“So did I,” she whispered, meeting his eyes.

“Then we’re gonna be fine, Pepi.” He took her hands in his, squeezing them tight. “You were jumping to conclusions. You didn’t even ask me how I feel. You just assumed you knew.”

“How do you feel?” Pepa chewed her lip nervously. Okay, here it was. He was going to be a good husband and not abandon her, but he’d never be able to look at her the same and his love for her would wane and- She found herself hyperventilating and tried to hide under the covers.

Félix sighed. “Honestly, Pepa, I feel hurt.”

And there it was. Her heart sank. At least she didn’t have to see him. The sheets muffled her tears.

“I’m hurt,” he pulled the covers off of her head, “because you kept this from me.”

“What?” Now she was confused.

“We shouldn’t be keeping secrets from each other. That’s not what you do when you’re married.”

“How did you even find out?” Her voice shook.

“It doesn’t matter. The part that hurts me is that I didn’t find out about it from you.”

Anger blazed in her eyes. “Who told you? I bet it was Bruno. Oh, I’m going to kill him,” she seethed, clenching a fistful of sheets.

Félix looked at her sadly. “We’re supposed to be a team, Pepa. Not hide things from each other. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because it doesn’t matter, mi amor.” She kissed his cheek softly. “I’m with you. I chose you. It doesn’t matter if I find women attractive. You’re it for me.” She clung to his arm, desperate to feel him next to her now that she wasn’t going to lose him.

“Doesn’t matter?” Félix asked in disbelief.

Uh oh. She should have known there would be a catch. Time for damage control. “Of course it doesn’t matter,” she cooed. “I’m exactly the same person I’ve always been. Nothing has changed. I love you with all my heart.”

“Wha-“ He shook his head. “I know that, Pepa. But it does matter. It’s a part of who you are, and it hurts me that you don’t trust me enough to share that with me.”

Pepa gasped. “You think I don’t trust you?”

“Yeah, I do. Why else would you keep this from me?”

“Because I didn’t want to risk losing you!” she yelled.

Silence filled the air, interrupted only by her sobbing.

“You actually thought you would lose me?” he asked gently, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

“Yes, Félix!” she cried out, her words garbled by the tears. “I…I know what everyone thinks about… people like me. I’ve heard it enough times, at church, in town, everywhere. I got the message. No one would want me. So I had to hide it.”

“Oh, Pepa…” Félix wrapped his arms around her, feeling her body shake as she sobbed. “I can’t imagine how hard that was for you. But…did you have to hide it from me too?”

“I didn’t know how you’d react. For all I knew, you’d be disgusted and never want to see me again.”

“It hurts me that you think so little of me.”

“Can you stop saying I’m hurting you?” she demanded, wresting herself from his hold. “I know. I know, okay? I’m a horrible person, and I’m sorry. I didn’t ask for it. It wasn’t my choice. My choice was to be with you. So,” she took a deep breath, “I’m sorry that I hurt you. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. It doesn’t matter to me anymore, because I have you. Why would I want anyone else? It’s in the past.”

“It matters because it’s part of who you are, Pepa. I want to know all of you. I want to love all of you. But I can’t do that if you don’t share yourself with me.”

“Really?” Pepa couldn’t believe her ears. “You’re…actually okay with this?”

“Pepa…you are my wife. This changes absolutely nothing about my love for you. I love you, just as you are.” He kissed her forehead.

“Thank you.” Tears of joy streamed down her face. It felt too good to believe.

“I married you because I wanted to be with you. So don’t keep yourself away from me. I want to know all of who you are.” He kissed the back of her hand. “No more secrets, okay?”

She nodded, still tearful. “No more secrets.” She fidgeted with the end of her braid. “That was the only one.”

“Thinking about it, it’s really not that surprising,” Félix mused.

“What do you mean?”

“I’ve seen how you dance with people at parties.”

“Félix!” She swatted him with a pillow.

“A lot of things make sense now, actually.”

“Like what?”

“Like how much you flirted with guys as a teenager, but would get really quiet around girls.”

“Those weren’t all crushes!” she protested, her cheeks burning.

“So you admit that some of them were?”

“Shut up!” She crossed her arms, fuming.

“Hey, you don’t have to be embarrassed about it. Teenage crushes happened to all of us.”

“I hate you so much.”

“No you don’t.” Félix peppered kisses all over her face, sneaking his hands up her sides to tickle her.

“S-stop it!” She erupted in a fit of giggles. Normally she hated being tickled, but she was feeling practically euphoric right now. Félix knew, and he didn’t care. And he still loved her. He could tickle her until the morning for all she cared.

Much to her surprise, he did stop. “You know…there is one thing I’ve been wondering…” Félix trailed off.

“If you’re going to ask if we can invite a woman to our bed-“

“No!” He was quick to reassure her. “Unless…is that something you want?” He looked at her unsurely.

“It’s not.” She kissed him on the lips. “What were you going to ask?”

“I was wondering if we’d kissed any of the same girls.”

Pepa burst out laughing. “What?”

“Well, you know, I dated a lot of girls before you.” Félix scratched behind his neck. “I know you dated other people before me. Maybe there was some overlap.”

“How on earth am I supposed to know whether there was any overlap?”

“How about we both make a list and see if we write down any of the same names?”

“I’m not doing that, Félix.”

“Okay, okay.” He raised his hands in defeat. “But it got you to laugh, didn’t it?”

“It did.” She smiled at him sweetly. “Thank you for being so wonderful to me.”

“No need to thank me for treating you the way you deserve to be treated.” He snaked an arm around her middle, pulling her into him. “I was kidding. Mostly.”

“Mostly?!” Her eyebrows shot up her forehead.

“I’m curious now.”

“Let it go, Félix.” She kissed him deeply before whispering in his ear, “It wasn’t as many as you think.”

“What??” he yelped. “Who?”

Her laughter was light, tinkling. She looked at the clock on the nightstand. “It’s getting late, mi corazón. We should sleep.” Pepa extinguished the lamp by their bed.

“You can’t just say that and expect me to be able to fall asleep after.”

“Good night, Félix.”

[yandere-romanticaa]

question: you're a big blog and everything so im a bit curious. Is the yandere side of tumblr comparably friendlier than other sides? like I'm always seeing discourse on other blogs and they tend to get into fights, while the yan side is just chilling. But I'm also aware that I don't have that large of a following and I don't really follow many blogs, so I'm kind of sheltered in away? Idk, what's your thoughts on the yandere tumblr community? At least, the genshin one

I noticed this too and now that you put it in words I'd say you're right!!

Something I noticed about dark content creators is how most are incredibly open about everything they do and are always willing to discuss anything and everything, I'm not even sure I can name someone who wouldn't welcome you with open arms. It also needs to be said that we're aware that what we are writing for wouldn't fly irl under any circumstance but that's what makes this so fun, it's literally just pure fantasy and everyone is here to indulge. If yandere or anything similar to that just isn't your thing you just walk away!

The Genshin community heavily depends on the platform. I'm strictly speaking from my PERSONAL experience but the worst one I'd say is on Twitter (come on guys...), Instagram is just chilling, drawing fan art although I've seen some dumb comments that shouldn't even be there despite the creator tagging everything accordingly 🙃 As for Tumblr it gets weird, hear me out on this one and you're more than welcome to tell me if I'm wrong BUT I feel like the Genshin fandom here (at least some people) have these weird unfulfilled desires and they themselves aren't sure what they are. They take comfort in the characters but whenever something goes wrong by THEIR book then it's time to witch hunt and whatnot. Tumblr is also a beehive of assholes who think they're better than you simply because they think they're on the moral high ground thus making them qualified to judge others. I once wrote something for Kaeya who falls for an older woman and in the end it's implied that he assaults her. I tagged it accordingly and most people really liked it but I got an ask calling me an ableist and that I should "grow up" for using the "r word". Considering that this hellsite really IS a hellsite I'm honestly shocked with how positive my experience on here was. I think I received maybe one (1) death threat, that ask I mentioned before and probably some weird stuff I can't be bothered to remember but other than that my entire Tumblr experience has been nothing other than heavenly. People here were so kind and good to me, not to mention friendly and welcoming, just very amazing people in general whom I all wish nothing but the best in their lives, and I mean it. I hope they're healthy, happy, eating good food and drinking well, I want all of their dreams to come true and everything in between. I can't begin to describe just how good people can be and that goodness really does trump all of the nonsense in between. Everything I've said has been highly subjective and just my own personal thoughts, so take it with a grain of salt because it's always different for everyone.