#and for desire to be like. oh it was for funsies. ]

[softlyspun]

Oh, this is fun! As a historical costumer, I have some Thoughts on how corsetry and fit interact, and this is actually a topic that was keeping me from writing a costuming post for the Ginger and Mint girls. Might as well get it out of the way now! So, corsets...

I think the first thing that might not be completely obvious is corsets are sturdy. Even cheap ones from places like Corset Story are much, mush heavier than, say, a t-shirt or dress shirt. For its components:

The Busk

So, when I refer to the busk, I'm taking about the front closure of the corset, this bit right here:

(My cat decided to help.)

This is the bit that's going to give you trouble when you put the corset on, even if it's the correct size. It's a rigid bit of metal, much, much less flexible than the rest of the corset bones, and it's where the closures are attached. Usually those are the little metal clasps that you see here, but sometimes, especially in modern fashion corsets, you get some really whimsical ones, like this thing from Corset Story.

I'm inclined to say the busk isn't generally a point of failure in a corset: those little metal loops are riveted in place.

Next, we have

The Bones

So, when I'm talking about corset bones, I mean these bits:

These are long strips of something stiff but flexible. Historically, whalebone (a misleading name, it's actually baleen) was used, though, you'll also see things like stiff cord or reeds used for the purpose. Modern corsets use plastic or metal. They tend to be about the weight and flexibility of zip ties, maybe slightly stiffer. With time and use, these bones will conform to the shape of the wearer's body. This is sometimes a point of failure, usually when the boning pokes through at either the top or bottom of the corset. This will usually manifest as the tip of a bone poking you. (Almost every time this has happened to me, it's been under the armpit, but it could just as easily jam annoyingly into your waist). I suppose, technically, if it was put under some kind of weird strain, a bone could snap and poke through the middle of the garment.

Last, we have:

The Laces

So, a corset is actually a fantastically adjustable garment. This isn't to say that it isn't possible to wear them too tight, or for a corset to be too small, but in general they're a lot more forgiving than pop culture would have you believe.

At least with the corsets I've worn, the top and the bottom of the corset actually lace separately, and they tie at the middle. I almost always end up loosening the laces almost as far as they'll go when putting a corset on, getting the busk fastened, and then lacing it to the desired tightness.

While it's possible to lace it up on your own, the whole thing is much easier with another pair of hands.

For the points of failure here: the laces themselves can vary wildly. I've personally never had an issue with laces breaking, but it's not impossible that they might fray/weaken against the eyelets, or, if they're under a lot of strain and made from a flimsier material, they might just snap. The eyelets themselves are another potential point of failure: I've found that they can pull out and tear a garment when under strain (Or if you make the mistake of putting a grommeted garment through the wash. RIP, the kirtles I made in college). This is less of an issue when you're looking at historical construction, since historical eyelets are more or less embroidered into the garment, like this:

This is stronger and less likely to pull out, but still has the potential to unravel or wear out.

The final potential point of failure is the fabric of the corset itself. Like I said, these things are sturdy, but they're not indestructible. If the corset was already worn/damaged, and not carefully mended, it's possible for the fabric to tear (possibly dramatically!)

Just for funsies, let's look at how likely the issues are to occur:

The corset is uncomfortably tight, and it's all your character can think about.

Yeah, this is absolutely likely to happen. I think anyone who's done historical reenactment or cosplay has misjudged the fit of a costume at some point. Bonus points if the corset is an integral part of the costume, or if you're at a con or a Faire where you can't easily get out of the stupid thing. It almost always goes along with chaffing from the fabric of whatever you're wearing underneath the corset (and you should be wearing something underneath the corset. They're undergarments, but not next-to-the-skin undergarments)

I actually have my own personal experience with this. At a wedding, a reenactment friend came up to ask why I wasn't dancing. When I mentioned that I was corseted into a formal dress that didn't quite fit, her face went from teasing to sympathetic, and she assured me that I should just sit down.

The corset won't fit, no matter how much your character--or a helper--tries to get it on.

Like I said before, corsets are surprisingly forgiving (just lace it looser), but sometimes a garment is just too small. This is bound to be a point of frustration: even mass-produced fashion corsets can set you back a couple hundred bucks, and it takes a while for them to ship. If it's a custom corset, that's a much, much bigger investment, in time, money, or both. Depending on how much time you have before the event where the corset was being worn, this might require some radical changes to costume/garment plans. Many historical dresses are made to fit over structured undergarments, and won't fit correctly (or possibly at all) without a corset underneath. If it's for a cosplay, this might mean having to frantically throw together a look-alike out of duct tape and hope the morning of the convention.

All that being said, it might be possible to salvage the garment by just adding in a new panel. This was often how maternity corsets were handled in-period. Still, if the character is in a hurry, this is likely to end up being an obvious patch job, especially if they don't have a matching fabric on hand. If the corset is being worn as an undergarment, this might not matter. If it's being worn as a fashionable overgarment, it might cause remarks.

The corset is beginning to break or come undone as it struggles to contain your character.

I suppose it's possible that a less-experienced assistant might tie a bad knot that could come undone, which would honestly be the best case scenario here. The corset would just loosen as the night went on. Otherwise, this is the herald of frustration: this is going to mean either some time-consuming repairs, or buying a new corset.

The corset bursts open, unable to contain the pressure behind it.

This one's pure fantasy (not that there's anything wrong with that!) The possible ways I can see this working:

The rivets along the busk pull out, letting the corset fall open in the front.

The laces tear, sending shreds of ribbon everywhere, and the garment opening in the back.

The fabric itself tears, probably along one of the sides, in between the bones.

The corset is too restrictive to take off, and your character needs help getting out of it.

This has so, so much potential for a sweet, intimate moment. At the end of a day, feet and head both aching, I've found that I usually just want my beautiful outfit off. And there's always that point of exhaustion, realizing that the busk isn't going to cooperate and let you get out without unlacing the stupid thing, but that the laces are either tied too tight for you to undo yourself, or the knot is just out of reach. Turning to your equally exhausted assistant, and just quietly asking for help. The sigh of relief when the corset finally falls away. The red marks on your skin, where the fabric was pressed too-close for hours. The overall soreness of being through a busy day in costume, and the satisfaction of having had a great event. A vow to take things easy tomorrow, to let your body rest and recover.

Anyway, those are my thoughts on corsets and historical costumes as they relate to this kind of kinky fun!

corset prompts if u can!!! like being too big for a corset and just either not fitting or burstin it if thats ok !!

A time and a place:

On the way to an event that your character needs/wants to look extra nice for.

At an event, presumably with plenty of people your character wants to look good in front of.

On the way home from an event that your character may or may not have gotten a little too wild at.

At home, while getting dressed.

At a store, while trying things on.

The issue:

The corset is uncomfortably tight, and it's all your character can think about.

The corset won't fit, no matter how much your character--or a helper--tries to get it on.

The corset is beginning to break or come undone as it struggles to contain your character.

The corset bursts open, unable to contain the pressure behind it.

The corset is too restrictive to take off, and your character needs help getting out of it.

The cause:

No fault on your character's part; the corset was simply too small for their body.

Too much eating/drinking.

The corset used to fit, but your character has gained weight since they last wore it.

Bloating, be it from nerves, bubbly drinks, something they ate earlier, what have you.

Too much movement, gradually wearing on the too-tight corset and/or your character.

[freytful]

My Desire of the Endless hot take is that Desire does not fuck. Desire is unfuckable. Desire is a voyeur and an instigator and would never in its fucking life just give you what you want? Desire barely even dresses sluttily, theyre mostly in full suits.

[formshaper]

this makes me sad for a multitude of reasons but one of them is just like. the "they were kissing." and "then we are not friends, you and i". how almost childish dream sounds about it. he was younger then (though cruel even then - "they say death is kinder than he is") and. ghghghghn. lies down.

[severalowls]

People who deliberately listen to certain things, or avoid things they like until they're in the shadow of the untracked period just so they can get particular results on Spotify Wrapped live a life I can't comprehend. Like this isn't a party, you aren't picking a song for your friends in the car, and the popular kids aren't listening in because you aren't 15 anymore. What you do in private shouldn't be a curated experience for a nosey theoretical audience......

[blusandbirds]

agh the thing about craigbond that makes me sad is that he really did want a future. with vesper or with madeleine. like james bond is a 'love em and leave em' stereotype but vesper was the beginning of his story as a 00 and he still wanted to run away with her and be in love. and the thing that sets off nttd is his desire to have a future with madeleine ahhhhhh

[chuuyasheaven]

bsd men as tits ass or thighs pls :3?? (specifically meursault boys)

“Tits, Ass or Thighs— What do they prefer?”

“—Everybody’s got certain preferences, don’t they? So, what are theirs?”

Tags: Dazai Osamu, Fyodor Dostoevsky, Nikolai Gogol, Chuuya Nakahara, Sigma / afab! Reader, Nipple play?, ooc! Sigma, praising kink, degrading kink, overstimulation, pet names?, hdc format ig, thigh riding?, hickeys, mentioned lingerie?, spanking, mild brat taming, atp everyone may be ooc, face sitting, oral sex (afab! and m! recieving), titty job, messes of their milk, might contain grammar errors, this is a lot holy shit, etc.

Notes: Maybe u just meant Dazai, Fyodor and Chuuya but I added Nikolai and Sigma for funsies— hope this is okay tho!! And I never wrote for Sigma before so sorry if he’s so ooc. . Maybe he’s gonna be added to my list lol.

Dazai Osamu ;

💙 Thighs 💙

💙 I just know that he loves your thighs!! In my opinion, DAZAI lives for seeing you in thigh highs, especially if you have thick thighs. What do you mean you don’t wanna crush him with them??? What else are they made for then— oh, right, hickeys. It’s obvious that he’ll leave some marks here and there for fun, but another thing he lives about them is face sitting. This is literally the best way to die?!!? But also he lives to grab your thighs when he eats you out!!!

💙 Scenario;

He’s been at it for too long, you don’t even remember how many times you came already. . “Dazai, p–please. . S–sensitive!”, you tried to beg, but Dazai was way into this— Once you sit on this mans face, he won’t let go until your too sensitive, Dazai also always leave hickeys while he’s at it. Chanting how he would love to die this way, being crushed by your massive thighs. “—Why should I? You’re still talking properly, I won’t stop until you’re only able to moan my name. Now be a good girl, alright, ‘donna?”

Fyodor Dostoevsky ;

💙 Thighs 💙

💙 In all honesty, this man is a mystery for me– but if I would have to chose, thighs. FYODOR is kinda religious and stuff, meaning he’s definitely gonna be kinda traditional. (i do not know wtf I’m talking abt.) Fyodor doesn’t know what it is, but something about you in white lingerie and white thigh highs sets him off completely. Looking all innocent but being the complete opposite? Yes, absolute approval from him. But being the busy man he is, he’ll let you sit on his lap while he caresses your thighs!! :3

💙 Scenario ;

Seriously, how desperate are you? Walking up to Fyodor in white lingerie and white thigh highs while he’s obviously working? He finds it quite amusing how you think he’ll stop immediately to fuck you, no he won’t, yet. Fyodor just commands you to sit on his lap, now you’re getting off on his own thighs. But you’re still wearing panties, though he doesn’t care, you wanted this, didn’t you? As you keep grinding against it, he slapped your pussy through the fabric multiple times before. The small whines and whimpers are cute, but won’t change his mind to take you right now. “—I don’t really know what you expected me to do. . Well, actually, i did. It’s quite adorable how you think just because you’re desperate I’ll feed into your desires. Anyway, you seem to be getting off pretty easily, slut.”

Nikolai Gogol ;

💙 Tits 💙

Come on, this is so NIKOLAI, seriously. He's so silly, he would literally call them his personal stressballs. (Do not even try to deny it, it's canon.) Nonetheless, he likes to cum on them, Nikolai will make a mess out of them every time whenever you're giving him head. Another thing their useful for, in his opinion, is tit fucking!! It's a nice feeling for him when his dick's inside of your tits. Not to forget, your nipples are pretty fun to play with, but there's one last thing about them. .

💙 Scenario ;

There are many reasons why Nikolai adores you riding him! He loves how he barely has to do anything, hearing the adorable sounds leaving your mouth while you get off on his cock and most importantly, the way your tits bounce with you. All he's doing is laying back and enjoying the view of your tits almost bouncing out of your bra, he would love if they were to actually jump out. “—Hm, would you look at that! Your tits are seconds away to spill out of your bra, dove. I wouldn't mind if they did, maybe you just need to ride my dick faster. . Just like the needy whore you are.”

Sigma ;

💙 Tits 💙

I’m not really sure if it’s accurate, but running an casino ain’t easy. So what’s better than having you and your comfort. .—able tits? SIGMA would never admit it, but he loves them, dearly at that. If he ever needs an break, his head would probably rest on them. On the spicy side, he loves a good tit job. You mentioned this once and Sigma wasn’t against it, sure he was blushing over your suggestion but after he tried it, he loved it!!!

💙 Scenario ;

It felt good, really, Sigma loved your suggestion! He never thought of something like this, he never thought about recieving a tit job, but it felt heavenly. Just the way your tits were rubbing against his cock so good, it felt unreal. . The most beautiful whimpers left his lips, with his flushed expression on his face too, you assumed Sigma was enjoying himself, very. Soon he reached his climax, letting his cum leak on your tits. “—F–fuck. . You did s–so good, darling. Now, lay back and let me return the favor, yeah?”

Chuuya Nakahara ;

💙 Ass 💙

Ah, yes. CHUUYA is, in my opinion, an ass man. I saw a few people say that, and I agree. Like, he’s literally proud of that. He would slap your ass unexpected, respectfully though. He wouldn’t care if you’re carrying a bakery or not, he still slapping it!! Chuuya loves to spend money on matching bras and panties for you, but on your in general. Sometimes it gets to your head or something and you start to act out, which our ginger won’t let slide.

💙 Scenario ;

Lately, you’ve gotten on Chuuya’s nerves. Yeah, he loves to spend money on you and you, but he won’t stand you being bratty. As to right now, he’s ‘punishing’ you for it. The reference for ‘punishing’ is quite just fucking you until it’s stuck in your pretty little brain not to act out again. This time though, Chuuya added something to your punishment. . “Ch–chuuya. . ‘m sorry, I–i didn’t mean to—”, you tried to apologize, only to be silenced by another spank. “—Really? Too bad, you’re gonna take this if you want me to fuck you, baby. Just keep on taking f’me and I’ll fuck you soon enough, m‘kay?”

OH EM GEE YOU GUYS IT TOOK ME THREE DAYS TO FINISH

[al-of-the-stars]

poly vees! poly vees! where everyone loves eachother

anyways, the vee's find themselves attracted to an imp!reader (maybe only one or two at first). i love the upper class x lower class dynamic ajhs

the imp was originally just trying to be a thief in peace and rob them, but they get caught in the process.

gn! reader is more desirable but you can go for a fem or male reader if you want!!

-🍋 anon

"Stole our hearts. (and our money lol)"

A/n: Hi, 🍋! This reminded me a bit of Blitzo and Stolas from Helluva Boss lol Ik I said this before but I'm not too familiar with poly relationships so I'm so sorry if I got anything wrong! I did gn reader but I did mention reader wearing one of Velvette's dresses so I hope it doesn't make anyone uncomfortable! Hope you enjoy!!

Imps were never respected in the hell hierarchy. How ironic that the ones who fucked up enough to get sent here are treated better than the innocent demons who never even got a chance at life in the first place. This was the reason you decided to become a thief. If no one was willing to hire the lowlife so that you could make an honest living, you would steal to live a comfortable life. You weren't a Saint by any means but you weren't evil enough to steal from your own kind, only people who either deserved it or people who could afford to be stolen from. That includes overlords, and more specifically, your latest victims, the Vees. They were known for their social influence on the residents of hell, but you didn't really care much since overlords only live in the pride ring and imps usually residents in Imp City in the wrath ring. That, however, doesn't mean you won't travel there and take their shit. You were currently at Vee Tower late at night. Everyone was asleep so you had the perfect chance to do your job and quickly scurry off, or at least that's what you thought, You usually work fast but that doesn’t take into account the time constraint of Vox’s new security system. The moment you touched the vase, a loud alarm rang and a few seconds later, Vox and his tired partners came up to you. 

“What do you think you're doing,” Vox said, his business smile faltering. Shit. You underestimated this guy's inventions. “Oh.. uhhh..” you were at a loss for words. What were you even supposed to say? ‘Hey I was about to steal this vase that you own’? Absolutely not. Luckily for you, they didn't seem to mind as much as you thought they would. Little did you know that every time you had stolen from the Overlords, they had known you were there. Although they didn't exactly appreciate you stealing their belongings, they had taken a bit of a liking towards you. Even when being mischievous little shit, you still had a sort of charm. Like when you were stealing one of Vox's newest prototypes and spent 10 whole minutes trying to figure out what it did before giving up and furiously putting it in the bag. Or that time you stole one of Velvette's dresses and before putting it in the bag you put it on, just for funsies. She had to admit, you didn't look half bad in her designs, maybe when you finally date them, she can ask you to model for her. And the time you tried to steal one of the blankets from one of Val's studios, which surprisingly sell for a lot. You hurriedly put it in the bag, trying to touch it as little as possible, who knows what things people had done in those blankets. They slowly fell for you one by one, maybe next time, they can finally ask you out. Once they give you the world, you finally won't have to steal their things.

[cinnbar-bun]

Trading Cards- Cross Guild's Day Off 1 (Cross Guild x Reader)

Summary: In which you work with the three Cross Guild officers and stumble across a new trading card game to introduce to them. Hilarity ensues.

Rating: SFW/Crack

Word Count: 1.8k

Notes: No relationships are defined, so feel free to headcanon whatever you want. I know it says x Reader up there and I wrote it in mind that it's a weird ass polycule but I made sure to leave it ambiguous for your reading pleasure. Reader is GN and gets Gumshoe'd, while Mihawk gains a gambling addiction. Minor swearing and violence (but funny).

A/n: Yes I collect the trading cards and I'll be damned if I don't put these three men through hell for funsies in this series (guess what's gonna happen next time).

"What's with all those boxes?” Buggy rubs his red nose as he twirls a knife in hand as you walk into the office. 

“You’ll never believe this! Apparently, someone’s been selling trading cards of famous pirates and marines! It’s a crazy new thing!” You happily plop the boxes on your desk. “And so, I managed to nab a few boxes!” 

Crocodile lowers the newspaper he’s reading to reveal his agitated face. “With whose money?” 

“Oh, that’s no biggie,” you wave off. 

“I’m docking your next paycheck,” Crocodile states as he goes back to reading. Mihawk raises a brow. 

“I have to ask, can they really just sell cards of us like that?” The swordsman questions. “Besides, what makes cards like that so interesting? Isn’t this simply a child’s collection?” 

“That’s what you think! But apparently, there are some secret rare cards everyone’s been dying to get their hands on!” 

You get a dark blue box and marvel at it. 

“Hey, why the hell is that Straw Hat on it?!” Buggy screams. “He’s a nobody! Who the hell wants a card of him?!” 

“Don’t worry, there’s cards of you, I think,” you respond, and Buggy gasps before lunging for the box. “Where?!” 

“I think it’s in one of them,” you point to the many boxes, and Buggy huffs. 

“Well hurry up and get to them!” 

“Don’t you guys wanna open them? They’re meant to be played in fun games,” you ask. “Here, I’ll separate them by fours, and everyone gets to make a new deck!” 

“I have no desire to-” Crocodile begins as you drop the card packets on his desk. 

“This is a strange form of games, but my interest is slightly piqued. I’ll take some,” Mihawk says, extending his hand. Buggy pouts as he’s the last to get them. 

“Now, open!” You yell, while you and the Cross Guild leaders begin to open the card packets. Buggy is tearing through them, shuffling through the cards manically. 

“HUH?! ALVIDA?!” He screams. “That’s not fair! How is she in this?!” 

He gets more frustrated as he opens the remaining packets. “They all say ‘C’ on them!” 

“They’re all common then,” you explain. Buggy lets out a sob at his bad luck. Mihawk and Crocodile ignore Buggy’s wails before Mihawk clears his throat. 

“I’m not asking for any particular reason, but since this is supposed to contain the most famous pirates, does that mean Red-Haired Shanks is a part of this?” Mihawk asks, a curious tinge in his voice. 

“I believe he is in here,” you nod. At your confirmation, Mihawk glares at the cards in his hands and tears them up. 

“C. C. C. C. SR. SR. C. C. R. R. C. UC,” Mihawk reads aloud his card rarities as he opens the pack. 

“Woah, who’re the SR’s?” You ask before Mihawk tosses the cards to the floor and opens another pack. 

“C. C. C. C. C. R. R. UC. UC. R. C. C.” 

“Mihawk, are you-” 

“C. C. C. C. C. C. C. UC. UC. R. C. L.” 

“Holy shit,” Buggy stares in awe as Mihawk’s hands move faster and his eyes frantically roam over the cards. 

“C. C. C. C. C. C. C. R. R. UC. C. L.” 

Crocodile rolls his eyes as Mihawk eventually covers his face with his hands, the non-Shanks having pile of cards a mess on the floor.

“What do you have?” The hooked man asks you. 

“Let’s see…” you open some packets and shrug at the some of the common cards, before you smile at an SR card. “I got you!” 

You proudly show off your new SR rarity Crocodile card. Crocodile motions you to step closer and gazes at the card. “Huh. That’s interesting. I better be strong.” 

“Maybe. I mean, it is an SR, and that’s pretty good!” 

“Why the hell are you an SR?! That’s bullshit! You got your ass handed to you by Straw Hat-” 

Crocodile immediately silences Buggy by pressing his hook onto the clown’s throat. “Want to finish that?” 

“N-no-” 

You continue to hum as you go through more cards. “Oh, Boa Hancock!” You squeal. “She’s so cool!” 

“Not as cool as us…” Buggy whines. Mihawk is still despondent on the couch. 

“Woah, I got Mihawk, too!” You gasp as a very cool card of Mihawk sitting on his throne is in your hands. 

“Okay, now that’s complete and utter crap! These two get in, but I don’t?! What the hell! I should burn these guys!” 

“How did they find out how my outfit and room looked like…” Mihawk mumbled as his face scrunched up. 

“You guys are getting so worked up over some silly cards,” Crocodile clicks his tongue as his cigar hangs from his lips. 

“Easy for you to say! You at least have a card in here!” Buggy whines. “This is so stupid! (Y/n), give me the other boxes, now!” 

“Hey, don’t grab them!” You swat your hands at the clown. “Crocodile still has to open his.” 

“I don’t care about him! I want to find me!” Buggy grabs the first box you opened and notices a pamphlet. 

“Huh? ‘Get your starter packs to begin playing’?” Buggy squinted as he went through the listed starter packs. “Let’s see… Straw Hat, that red-head-” 

“Shanks?!” Mihawk jumps. 

“Not that red-head,” Buggy interjects, and Mihawk sighs. “Kaido, Big Mom, Crocodi- wait a damn minute! How are you the face of one of the starter packs?” 

“I am?” Crocodile blows a puff of smoke. 

“Yeah! ‘Seven Warlords of the Sea’ starter pack! You jerk! Why is it you?!” Buggy screams angrily as Crocodile chuckles and twirls his cigar in his fingers. 

“Well, I am the obvious choice, aren’t I?” Crocodile strokes his chin. “I am strong, handsome, and far more intelligent and renown than the others. Why wouldn’t they put me on the cards?” 

“And humble,” you mutter. 

“Another dock to your paycheck,” Crocodile adds, the smile on his face returning to his usual humorless appearance. 

You slump your shoulders pitifully. “Crocodile, I can barely afford instant ramen at this rate.” 

“Aw, it’s okay, Buggy’s here for you,” Buggy chuckles as he pats your back, relieved he’s not at the receiving end of Mihawk and Crocodile’s torment. 

The four of you continue to open box after box of booster packs, with you mostly happy to just see the cool art, and Buggy hitting the floor in retaliation to his awful cards. 

“Nothing! Not even one of me! And they’re all commons!” 

“I really don’t know how that happened…” you pitifully look at him. 

“You making fun of my nose?!” Buggy screamed, looking up at you as his makeup smeared down his face due to his crying. 

“Oh…” you wince at the sorry state he’s in. “It’s okay, we can always-” 

“Shiny foil!” Mihawk shouts, making everyone in the room jump. “Is it finally-” 

He pulls out the card, only to scream in agony as he drops to his knees and lets the card fall through his fingers. 

You curiously pick up the card, only to see it’s sadly not Shanks, but someone called… “Sogeking”? 

“Who is this?” You stared at the card. 

“(Y/n),” Mihawk shakily fumbles through his pockets and pulls out a bag of berries. “I don’t care what it costs. Go. Buy more boxes.” 

He drops the bag in your hands and shields his eyes with a hand. Crocodile opens another packet and lets out a chilling laugh. 

“What’s so funny, Croc?” Buggy asks, nervously anticipating how badly things will go when Crocodile is laughing like that. 

“You’re looking for a card of Red-Hair, aren’t you?” Crocodile’s voice lowers, the smirk on his face widening. 

“No we’re not!” Mihawk and Buggy shout at the same time, making you and Mihawk raise a brow at Buggy’s admission. 

“Oh? So then it’s fine if I keep this card? Perhaps sell it even?” Crocodile holds up the card and everyone’s eyes are wide as you three gasp. 

In his hand, is the Secret rarity Shanks card. 

“You…” Mihawk says under his breath. 

“How the hell did…” Buggy’s eye twitches. 

“Woah… so lucky,” your eyes lighten. Crocodile’s chest rises with every laugh he lets out. 

“Since no one else wants it, I think I may just sell it and get back the money (Y/n) stole for this!” He proclaims. 

In an instant, Mihawk stands up and pulls out Yoru, pointing it at Crocodile. 

“Hand it over.” 

“You don’t get to make the demands here, Hawk Eyes,” Crocodile shakes his head. “What are you willing to offer?” 

“Give it, or I’ll kill you.” 

“Okaaay, well, there’s no need to kill each other-” you stand up, trying to get between the two men. 

“I’m not asking again, Crocodile,” Mihawk threatens. Buggy scowls and then jumps to his feet, pulling out his knives. 

“Yeah! We aren’t asking again! Hand it over!” Buggy yells, feeling confident with Mihawk’s strength at his side. 

Mihawk locks his gold eyes onto Buggy and Buggy cowers in fear. 

“N-never mind! Have it!” He surrenders. 

You nervously think of what to do before you rip up the last packet in the room and pray to whoever is listening for another Shanks. 

C. C. C. C. C. C. UC. UC. C. C. C. 

You gulp. There’s only one more card. This card can either save your life, or lead to a massacre from Mihawk. Your fingers reach in and pull out the last card, and you raise a brow at the shiny gold border. 

“What is this,” you murmur as you finally reveal the full card. 

A Secret rarity Shanks card. But unlike Crocodile’s card, yours is a stunning art piece of Shanks. With a gold border and a badass look in Shank’s eyes, you’re in awe. Even Buggy gasps at the sight. 

“M-Mihawk! We got you a Shanks!” You flail the card in your hand to draw his attention, and Mihawk swipes the card from you. 

“Don’t do that! You’ll ruin it!” He lectures you and stares at the card. “Incredible. I never knew this was in here.” 

He drops Yoru to the ground and presses the card to his chest, as if all the weight in the world was finally gone from him. Crocodile rolled his eyes and promptly threw his card to the ground in front of Buggy. 

“Come the hell on, (Y/n)! I was negotiating!” Crocodile sighs in frustration and rests his chin on his hand. “I’m not paying you at all this week!” 

You don’t even care anymore, crying tears of joy at the fact the sword that clattered on the ground beside you was not spearing your chest. 

“Since we all got decks now, why don’t we try and play the game?” You innocently suggest. You lay out the multipage rule guide and manual as the three men surround you to take a peek. 

Immediately after seeing the abundance of rules, all of you grimace and shake your heads. 

“Maybe another time.” 

“Yeah.” 

“That’s good.” 

“Great idea.” 

[pomefioredove]

Ah

Was going over the voicelines and references and aaa it's so fun

I think i found the snippets that were good fodder for vilyuu. some of them from the post that goes into depth for vilyuu this one -> the link ( https://jasminetl.lofter.com/post/1d5363f0_2b4c8f58d )

These ones are fun

From the camping event, outdoor wear

I know I'm beautiful but did you know i can be rugged too? Look how rugged i can be. <- vil really said i can do both actually. He didn't have to say that, he singled out yuu for that

Invitation for yoga and exercise by the lakeside

From beanfest (this one i might be just really intensely wanting to see but ahhh who knows)

So again, he's like " I'm not JUST pretty, look how cool and capable i am. I can even get dirty for this"

And again he's like "y'know being covered in dirt and scuffed from battle can look attractive. Don't you think that looks attractive??" <- vil why are you seeking so much approval??? Do you have something to say???

The more i look through the voicelines (between him and Yuu) and in other events the more i find that a lot of it really does kinda boil down to "heh, isn't this cool? Do you think it's cool 👀" subtle gauging of interest type of stuff. Trying to help, to get some hang out time (usually in excuses though not always), constantly dropping those hints. It's very funny, even more so compared to how he acts with other characters in similar situations. I'm just saying that vil very much offered only prefect his cape to hide in to protect from ghosts, and didn't really offer as such to any. He's Definitely more likely to get irked by someone else asking for his time than prefect lol.

Anyways thought to drop this in to the ask box due to that last post about vilyuu week and just like for funsies

look at this man.

he wants them so bad it makes him look stupid /ref

I think it's delightful how he has 10 billion fans and a live-in hype man but he still purposefully seeks out approval from Yuu. which could mean nothing.

I read a lot of voice lines on the wiki when I'm trying to develop a character's voice and his definitely stand out because. hmmmmm 🤨

touch

vil has mixed reactions to being touched (by yuu), I suspect a part of that is just being overwhelmed from time-to-time

like this:

"I know you want me to pay more attention to you, but it will have to wait. I'm very busy at the moment."

(okay but notice how he he doesn't say no. he says later. okayyyy mr schoenheit. making room in the schedule for your little angel huh. I see how it is)

other times he's okay with it:

"Ah, but of course. Given my radiant allure, I can hardly fault your overwhelming desire to touch me."

and other times he ASKS(!!!) yuu to touch him:

"The placement of a single hair can greatly affect the outcome of a photo. Could you fix this for me?"

>_> I'm just saying.

obvious flirting (and banter)

not including the obvious ploys for yuu's attention which he does CONSTANTLY (as you have shown in your ask!) there's a lot of. uh

"Is it the dorm uniform that leaves you smitten, or is it I? Heh..."

"Admiration nurtures the seed of beauty. By all means, fall for me."

"Unfortunately for you, you have nowhere else to turn. So you'd best resign yourself to becoming my thrall."

"I will sink my fangs right into you."

I KNOW this is the halloween event and he's only playing the part, but c'mon. come on. COME ON

"Trick or treat! But I'm not after your candy. Vampires are more interested in... Heh heh!"

why is he giggling.

then there's cute little bantery moments like:

"Where's MY souvenir, then? ...Oh, goodness. I was only kidding, but you actually had one for me. Why, thank you."

IDK the way he feels comfortable and friendly enough around yuu to joke with them... 🥺🥺 they make me want to chew metal

"You'd like to visit the Scalding Sands with me someday? Certainly-as long as you draw up an itinerary that won't leave me bored."

they're planning a date here actually. hello. I hate them so much (lying)

and whatever you'd call this

"You are the last person I ever expected to make me happy. That's a compliment, by the way. Thank you for your warm wishes."

THEY MAKE ME SICK. I read this in a mean way at first but now I think that's just his sick twisted version of flirting. "I never expected you would make me so happy but you do and I'm still partially in denial about it" DO YOU HEAR YOURSELF

other stuff

these are like random and inconsequential, I just like them

"Parting is such sweet sorrow."

this is literally just Shakespeare. does Romeo and Juliet exist in this universe or did he come up with that. crazy thing to say either way

anyway yeah. these are taken out of context and such so there's other stuff going on but you get my point. the OTP

[sixeyescurseuser]

《1》

Except it does keep happening. There will be random periods where Gojo just randomly shifts into his swan form? Always when he’s in the apartment. Usually when around Geto too. 

It’s very healthy, or so Geto claims. To be comfortable with his animal side and embrace shifting instincts - which are very normal - all Gojo needs to do is learn how to control his shifting. 

Despite not jumping up and down about this, Gojo supposes he’ll live. He got flying down pretty easily. Just flaps his wings and zooms around like a little airplane in their living room and kitchen. He dive bombs Geto for funsies too. 

While navigating the hybrid experience to its fullest potential, Gojo also comes to terms with the fact that at some point, he’s fallen for his roommate, wholly and irrevocably. 

The easing into physical intimacy was definitely the start of it. Gojo loves when their chests are pressed together for whatever reason, in a hug or cuddling. 

Listening to the way Suguru describes Gojo's dance after each moment - in complete awe - Gojo realizes that yeah, Suguru has always seen him. Every part of him.

Suguru makes him happy. 

It's really a no-brainer that Gojo feels the desire to mate. 

Meanwhile, Geto continues to look up every last piece of information on swan hybrids. He wants to be prepared in case Gojo struggles with anything other than shifting. And if reading about swans courting and mating rituals are part of this process, then so be it. Geto sure isn't going to complain.

When Gojo stumbles across Geto's notebook of information, he becomes even more fond of Suguru.

During one of the biggest performances Gojo has ever put on, he debuts of a new kind of dancing called “shift dancing," where he shifts mid-dance from human to swan, swan to human. Or pops his wings out to fly as a human, still moving along to the music, dropping white feathers to a few lucky members of the audience. 

It’s a huge step in the dancing world, as well as for Gojo himself in showing off his swan side. After the final bow and the curtains close, Gojo is vibrating from the post-adrenaline of the show and-

He's itching to find Suguru, who will be backstage soon.

Geto shows up with a giant bouquet of Gojo's favorite flowers. Gojo lets out a happy squawk and catapults himself into the air - trusting Geto would catch him. 

Geto quickly switches the bouquet to one arm and catches Gojo with the other. 

"Satoru, what are you- I- oh my goodness, you're jittery," Geto laughs as he's frantically nuzzled. Geto is so proud of him.  "God, words cannot describe how breath-taking you were out there."

Gojo suddenly feels all fuzzy from being in Geto's arms. He merely hums in response. 

"Satoru, do you want to change out of your uniform?"

Gojo shakes his head. Geto laughs, and can't help but place a kiss on Gojo's hair. 

"You want to go out to our celebratory dinner in your uniform?"

Gojo pops out of his hiding place at that.

"Dinner? Where?"

"I booked that new place you wanted to try. All you can eat buffet. With sashimi, and wagyu, and fish," Geto murmurs.

Gojo positively wiggles in happiness, throwing Geto off balance. 

"Satoru-!"

"Let's go! Right now!"

Who is Geto to tell him no?

Cut to Geto literally feeding Gojo because Gojo deserves to be spoiled. Geto is rambling on about the food, saying, "This is good for your protein intake, which you need for muscle repair and growth. Got some healthy fatty acids here too~"

Gojo has long finished chewing and listens like 🥺 

He leans forward to peck Geto's lips, effectively cutting Geto off. 

Then, Gojo steals the bite of food from Geto's chopsticks, chewing with satisfaction. 

“I- Satoru?" Geto blinks, malfunctioning. Gojo merely raises an eyebrow. 

"Hm?"

If Geto had his panther ears, they'd be twitching with interest.

"You better not be messing with me-"

Gojo steals another kiss. Geto lets out a low growl and grabs ahold of Gojo's chin to keep him from pulling away. They both sigh into the longer kiss, noses lightly bumping.

When they slowly pull away, Gojo's eyes flutter open. Geto could count how many pretty, white eyelashes he has up close. 

Geto shakes his head, murmuring, "Fuck. The things you do to me."

"Nuh-uh. The things you do to ME,” Gojo counters, feeling a surge of emotions well up inside. “You feed me and hug me. You rub my back when I'm cranky, and watch all my dance performances. You let me have the comfier side of the couch and you look at me as if I'm your entire world or something. How do you expect me NOT to fucking fall for you, idiot?"

"I-I, I didn't realize-"

Gojo shoves a bite of food in Geto's mouth. "If you're not confessing, I don't wanna hear it."

Seconds later, Geto is nosing at Gojo's neck, lifting up slightly to whisper in Gojo's ear: "All right, darling. Let me take you home - I'll give you a real confession."

***

When they get back home, the new couple begin bickering about which room shoulder be shared as “theirs.

Geto: “Mine already has my scent!”

Gojo: “Mine has my nest!”

Geto: “Mine’s facing away from the street!”

Gojo: “Mine’s closer to the kitchen!”

In the end, they wind up in Geto’s room. 

Gojo has full reign of recreating his nest there, and easy access to his mate’s entire closet. 😈

***

w/ @no-one-says-hi

[erikahenningsen]

if you're still accepting prompts, maybe 81. “It’s cold, you should take my jacket.” for rejanis :)

81. “It’s cold, you should take my jacket.”

A/N: This exists in the universe of the plot got twisted and the fact turned fiction (chapter three specifically) from Regina's perspective, just for funsies, but you can read it on its own.

It's an unusually cool night, a breeze coming off the lake and wrapping itself around Regina's ankles.

She sits on the edge of the porch, breathing in the air thickened with humidity that smells distinctly like summer. The brief reprieve is much needed, even though nothing is wrong, not really. But sometimes being around her friends—Cady and Aaron, happy with each other; Damian, happy in his own skin; and Janis, happy without her—becomes overwhelming.

It reminds her of everything she doesn't have, everything she has lost.

The past is the past, and my past doesn’t predict my future, Regina thinks to herself, repeating the mantra her therapist had given her. I forgive myself for mistakes I made and I refuse to hold them against myself.

The door creaks open behind her, making her jump.

"Hey, sorry," Janis says, stepping outside. "Didn't mean to scare you."

"No worries," Regina says. She leans back on her hands as Janis sits down next to her, only a few inches separating their legs.

"You okay?" Janis asks. She pulls one knee to her chest, and Regina has to try very hard not to let her eyes trace the line of Janis's leg from her knee down to the hem of her shorts.

"Oh, yeah," Regina says, clearing her throat when it comes out a little hoarse. "Just needed some air."

Janis just hums, still looking at Regina, and for a moment, Regina lets herself look back. Janis is so beautiful, and Regina's chest physically hurts with the need to tell Janis that, but she swallows it down.

Regina makes herself look away, certain that if she stares any longer Janis will be able to read all of her desires on her face—her fantasies of holding Janis's hand or braiding her hair that somehow feel more embarrassing than any of the weird sexual solicitations that boys at school have DM'd her.

Janis shifts, putting her leg back down, and this time their skin does brush. It sends a shiver down Regina's spine before she can stop it.

"Here," Janis says, shrugging off her hoodie. "It's cold. You should take my jacket."

Regina isn't cold. In fact, she feels like she's burning from the inside out, desire hot and licking at the wall of her chest, a fire that started long before that fateful day in sixth grade, a fire that had at times reduced to embers but never was extinguished.

But she can't tell Janis that, and she also can't resist wrapping herself in the soft jacket, large and loose and smelling so much like Janis—the closest thing she might get to being wrapped in Janis's embrace.

Regina comes back to reality after a moment, remembers that Janis is still here, next to her, surely entirely uninterested in Regina's silly romantic fantasies.

So Regina forces a smile. Scoots a few inches away. Casually says, "Thanks."

It's all under control.

[tamelee]

Hi, what do you think sets SNS apart from other ships? I like lots of ships but after a time I kind of forget about them or don't care as much but I could never fully stop thinking about SNS. Funny it's not even an explicitly "cannon" ship as others.

Yeah, same for me! 😩

Because they are canon.

Well, fine. Technically, they are not considered canon due to a detached sequel that attempts to redefine their relationships. Now it’s canon that they’re married to women they’ve never felt love for, and some executive's niece wrote a trash novel to try and make it seem the original author had it all wrong, or they change the narrative for convenience sake. It's similar to following a recipe to bake bread, only to have someone mislabel it as an inflatable bike for funsies and profit.

But think about it: what about SNS is not canon?

Their bond, their journey, and everything that led up to that moment of reconciliation and hope is in fact explicitly canon. Both in text and sub-text. And if we’re talking romance specifically, the action shown in Kishimoto’s Manga and sacrifices they make for each other, go way beyond the mere declaration of “I love you." Many  things Naruto and Sasuke said to each other go hand in hand with an ‘I love you’ anyway—mutually.

It’s funnier knowing that Kishimoto did use such spoken, explicit declarations of “I love you” only with the intention to mock it or show how one-sided it was. That such words are rendered meaningless in a world that required these characters to explore what (personal) bonds meant in the first place. Naruto's words in VotE1 didn't yield the desired outcome, leading him to remain mostly silent during VotE2. That’s all with good reason. Alternatively, words are deemed unnecessary as per Naruto's belief that men express emotions without verbalizing, and Sasuke's view that they can understand each other's hearts through their fists. Or how Kishimoto decided to use a single page with no spoken words to show a mutual romance between Konan and Yahiko. Oh, and look at that; Kishimoto does know how to show romance when he wants to. Kushina and Minato didn’t need it; neither did Tsunade and Dan, nor did the romance in Kishimoto’s previous Manga.

We can delve deeper into Naruto's persuasive techniques, like 'talk-no-jutsu,' and question its effectiveness compared to his actions, as he also applied it to himself without significant results, right? Often, the words spoken by these characters didn’t even match how they truly felt anyway. Like Naruto trying to convince himself what's right for the people instead of what he wanted, or Sasuke during the reunion scene. That’s why context is so damn important.

And I could go on and on about this, tbh.

I believe it’s a mixture of their beautiful story as well as the passion to defend the authenticity that is SNS from external pressures like fan interpretations and industry expectations. I think it’s no wonder people go so hard to preserve Kishimoto’s original intent or, on the other hand, to try and disprove it.

For me... I have many ships that I like, but they’re just that: ships. And that’s fine, of course, but there is a difference. 

[blond-jerk-tourney]

Champagne Bracket: Round 3, Poll 1

Propaganda from submitters Under Cut

Yoshiya "Joshua" Kiryu

He’s a bitch and a hate (love) him. I will now quote him below: "Sigh... I don't do the whole sweating thing, Neku." "Very impressive, Neku. Show those fifth graders who's boss." "Who needs other people's values? It's easier to just live by your own rules." "Oh! I can't say I'm particularly interested, but... I'll go ahead and ask, for the sake of convenience. Do you have a name?"

Smug asshole. Always playing mind games with the player character. Has many secrets but never shares them. Also did a bunch of spoilery shit.

Byakuya Togami

Very elitist, constantly calls others "commoners", talks about how he is gonna kill someone and get out of the killing game, hangs up a corpse and writes a message with their blood on the wall because he already knows the murderer but wants to see who is smart, complains the other students left him out even though he made sure to tell them every time that he wants nothing to do with them, pretty sure he screams in the 4 chapter " How can you know something I don't know?!", the only reason he doesn't qualify as a villain is cus he doesnt kill someone and in the end works with the rest of the survivors. He also constantly wants the protagonist to tell the rest what he knows

he's mean and self-centered and sees himself as above everyone else.

such a cunt 😭 doesnt eat breakfast w everyone and spends all his time in the library. (also he tampered with a crime scene but spoilers)

His title is literally, get this, "ultimate affluent progeny" Fucking look at him /hj Treats everyone as inferior in every way, even when they're trying to solve a murder he goes "how did YOUUU figure this out before MEEE???? >:0" Constantly has an "Me vs. Them" mentality about everything so he feels the need to prove himself to be superior - Messes with crime scenes because it would "make them more interesting" (purposefully incriminating someone else, who he didn't like) Actual quotes by him: "I'm only here to get breakfast. I have neither need nor desire to talk to you. Now withdraw." "You're like a child lost in the woods, you know that? A total waste of space." "You know, I still just can't believe it... That an uneducated, brain-dead, useless piece of garbage like you has survived this long." "You have only yourself to blame—you came to me with your tragic little story. I didn't ask you to. This is the real world, not some romantic fantasy fairytale."

This rich mf… He spends the entire game being a snobby, condescending, uncaring asshole. He becomes relatively nicer by the end but never stops being a dick. He also desecrated a corpse once for funsies. He’s also stupid but he doesn’t know that. I both like and hate him. It’s complicated.

He's an heir to a wealthy family corporation and he sure does act the part. He acts like he's better than everyone else and thinks they're not worth his time. He's just a huge asshole. (SPOILERS) He tampers with a murder scene just for fun and outs another student's secret alter, knowing full well it was irrelevant to the case. He also has a small breakdown about being wrong in another trial. By the end, he becomes a bit more likeable and kinda a tsundere that pretends like he doesn't care about the other survivors (but he totally does). Still very much an asshole though. He's a fucked up lil guy and something about him draws me to him. I would kick his rich bastard shins IRL given the chance, however.

He is emotionally detached from his classmates…

why you should vote byakuya "tell em naegi" thanks for watching like and subscribe

[quirkle2]

you didn't just write that angst down of your zombie au and expect me to go on about my day without crying,,,,

also also, now i wonder what did mob do to finally have reigen and teru trust that he's, well, still him? WHAT HAPPENED I NEED TO KNOOOOW (and the terumob hug oh no, oH NO *RIPS MY HAIR OUT)

((sorry if i'm asking too much i'm just that invested in this au jwnxjwndi i hope you don't mind 🥹))

DW im like so stoked abt the questions i LOOOOVE talking abt the zombie au it makes me ill

i think it's a lot of little things that add up, actually. mob, compared to other zombies, is still quite reserved and quiet. in his weird little sparse mumblings, they occasionally catch what sounds like pieces of their names in the stream of syllables. even tho he's a zombie now and most of them r usually sloppy in their movements, mob still sits with relatively good posture and with his hands politely in his lap

one of the biggest things was seeing him sit down next to ritsu and plop his head on his shoulder. old habit of his when ritsu was bummed abt smth... they saw that and the gears started churning..

a lot of behavior can be explained away if ur desperate enough for sciency proof, which is what teru likely tries to pull at first. zombie mob watches ants on the ground and gets easily distracted by animals and bugs, much like he used to pre-zombie, but many many zombies do that anyway... the hug-back is purely muscle memory there's surely no recollection of emotions or a desire to comfort in there... that thing he still does when he tilts his head at confusing things is surely a Typical Zombie Behavior

when they go to grocery stores to loot them mob stands in front of the fridges with the milk cartons that are 100% expired by now, like he wants one. he seems more quiet and a little bummed when ritsu tells him they're bad by now and that he can't have one. him and teru Totally used to have one of those silly secret handshakes for the funsies and teru starts it on instinct one day and mob returns like ?half of it in a very stilted and sloppy fashion, struggling to remember but doing it well enough.that almost makes teru cry Again

but honestly, even without any of that at all, if they rly search in his eyes, they See it. they see Him, and they never know how to describe it, but he's still there in his gaze, it's just incredibly muted and tired. there's recognition when he turns his head and looks at them, there's even some semblance of fondness when they smile at him. you don't see it if u aren't looking for it, and at first they're convinced that's the deal, that they Want to see it so obviously it's just a trick of their brain that they Do, but...it is there. he is still there

reigen and teru quickly join ritsu in the belief that mob is still very much mob, in almost every interaction they have with him. and they quickly become just as eager to find a cure for him—seeing him be Him But Not Quite is harder on them than they thought it'd be,, makes them miss him that much more

[fangirl-docintraining]

do you have any tips on how to start writing fics?

the outsiders brainrot actually has me coming up with ideas and i have a desire to start writing them into actual stories but i've never written outside of class papers/assignments and i don't really know where/how to start since it's all just my own prompts and ideas and there's no grading rubric lmaoooo

like do you plan out each chapter with a list first or do you just start writing about the main plot point of the chapter and fill in around that out of order or do you just start writing and see where it takes you...

how do i know when to stop writing or decide on which endings/paths/plot points to go with... the deadly combo of indecisiveness and perfectionism along with having no guidelines or due dates is crippling me so im asking some of my fave fic writers (who have been inspiring me to write and be creative as well)

Okay disclaimer: I haven’t taken an English class in uhhhhhh 6 years which is whack to think about

Tbh I’m a big reader of fics and so as far as the inspo to write I just tend to want to write stuff that im like I’d love to see a characters thoughts or experiencing XYZ

My way of writing might be unique idk because I know a lot of fic writers have a like general idea of where the story is gonna go from start to finish. I uhh do not have that 😂 I legit come up with a general thing I want to happen for the chapter (ie current chap I’m writing is Soda’s birthday and I want him to have a moment of insecurity) and then I just sit down and start writing with that as a goal. I feel like usually I have one idea or a line in mind of like that’s where I want to end up. Last chapter I posted I was like okay goal is Betty and Darry are skinny dipping and she somehow ends up holding on to him in the water. And then I just free write and it just happens. I also have a tendency to edit as I go in terms of how to stop. To be fair I just like to pick a little moment where I feel like there’s resolution or a moment where I��d be like on a cliff hanger and stop there but I silly know I’m done with a chapter when I’m like okay this is enticing enough that I as the writer want to know what happens next so I stop and then make myself wait to write the next one. Basically I guess I write almost as a reader where I’m like omg I can’t wait to see what’s next 😂 (unfortunately then there are times I read my own stuff and I’m like wait I want another scene of Darry and Betty and then I go…. Oh girl you gotta write it first 😭 )

Idk if that’s helpful at all but also feel free to dm me if you’re 18+ I love talking! However in terms of writing I’m a chaotic example cause med students do very little writing at all, and def not creative writing unless we do it for funsies 😂

[adelrambles]

I am so sorry I promise I’ll stop spamming you about Bishop now (maybe.)

Do you think Bishop could ever be in a healthy relationship? What would the dynamic be like with evil Bishop versus Fast Forward Bishop?

And no I don’t mean Stockshop. 😭

Oh no worries at all I'm enjoying your questions!! Please feel free to spam to your heart's desire. Sorry it took so long to get around to this one, I have admittedly not put much thought into Bishop in romantic scenarios, so I had to think on it a bit!

So, could Bishop ever be in a healthy relationship? Short answer NO. NOT AT ALL LOL

Slightly longer answer, there is some potential depending on how you like to interpret Fast Forward!Bishop. I think it's impossible for Present-day Bishop to be in any sort of healthy romance (and I'll go into way more detail than neccessary about that below 👍) but if you take FF's presentation of the character at face value, there's certainly a possibility.

So long answer, Bishop is one of the single most self-centered, unexamined people to walk the damn earth. There are a lot of factors that go into why he would be just, the absolute worst in a relationship, but the biggest issue is he doesn't give a shit about anybody but himself. If we throw everything else out and consider a hypothetical where he enters a relationship for the relationship's sake, he is not capable or willing to see things from a partner's perspective. In any disagreement he will be unwilling to consider he could be wrong, and will go to great lengths to ensure the other person concedes or backs down. He is a paranoid control freak who would not stand for anything less than being agreed with and obeyed, and he is perfectly willing to break someone down to achieve that. And in a scenario where, indeed, his interest is actually in the other person, we know he has a terrible possessive streak. As long as his interest holds, there is no out for the hypothetical partner. He is going to be emotionally and mentally abusive at best.

Moving more to the particulars of what he'd want a relationship for, it's worth pointing out that Bishop is very single-minded and relentless in his ultimate goal. I find it very difficult to consider a scenario where any single person would be considered worthwhile enough to distract him from that. We've seen him willing to sacrifice personal friends in-canon for the sake of his experiments, (if you ascribe to the theory that J. Finn was mutated on purpose to some degree,) so his work is ALWAYS going to come first. But that's the nicer option, because there is always the possibility that he would consider a relationship if it benefitted his greater goal (OR fed his ego tbh.) In which case, he's only in it for what he can get out of the other person, and the second they've outlived their usefulness to him, well-- I guess it depends on how much sensitive information they know, by that point.

But, okay! Let's consider President Bishop. He's certainly less likely to lure in a partner just to use them and then dispose of them, so he has that going for him. With him, there is a lot of room for how you want to interpret his "change of heart." You could take it at as presented in the show, or read more into his actions based on what we know about his past. Personally, I prefer the latter, but I'll examine both for the sake of thoroughness, and also for funsies.

So let's assume Bishop is being genuine in how he acts, first. In this case, I think there's a decent chance he could learn to be a good partner, though I don't think he'd start out that way and I doubt it'd come naturally to him loL. His job requires a lot of time and attention from him, and he is always going to prioritize it; he is, after all, "a bigger picture kind of guy." Kindness does not come naturally to him, so in times of stress he may default to meaner actions. However, he is also pretty effective in learning and adapting, so with good communication he probably won't make the same mistakes too often. In this scenario I think time constraint really is the biggest obstacle, given his job.

Now, assuming his Good Guy act is just a mask for politics? He's still pretty damn toxic. Bishop's tactics have changed, but his personality remains pretty similar. I'm not sure his pleasant demeanor goes that deep, once you get into more than small talk. It's a necessity for his job, but he still appears to be cold and utilitarian underneath it. He still thinks he's right about everything, and based on the insidious ways he phrases his own backstory to always shift blame away from himself, (even throwing Stockman under the bus, STILL, just to look better in comparison,) he's gotten a LOT better at making it feel like he is always in the right. What you've got is a Bishop who can lie, persuade and charm better, who also still doesn't care about much beyond protecting his territory and using the people around him. This presents us with a partner who, unlike 2000s-era Bishop, is far FAR more subtle with his abuse. And again, heaven forbid he actually genuinely has an interest in his hypothetical partner, because now he has galactic-wide surveillance and public sway on top of the immortality, and they're never getting away.

I hope that answers to satisfaction! Honestly while it's not my cup of tea it is really interesting to examine this facet of his character, so thank you for the question!!