#and ethan is happy so i am happy yknow

[garlique]

bought a fucking car yesterday lads

[doggyboyf]

WARNING: extremely long poorly written post ! dbd skin/character concepts ive been thinking about tonight/i just want to see bc some of these are based on these being easy ideas and others being impractical that i just wanna see Nemesis: this is brought on by my 1. dislike of his blighted skin and 2. realization of what a missed opportunity it is to not give him a Mr. X skin, its literally perfect they're both tyrants with almost the exact same build, only issue is X's gloves :/ i don't see a way to make nemmie's visible infection rate work or his tentacle make sense so i admit that's an issue, but... maybe his late game look could work better? sadly that does get rid his iconic look i'd actually want for the skin tho hgvbhjbvhb 2nd concept i have for nemmie is impractical and would possibly better as a skin for a non RE killer but i'd just love to see it and that's a RE1 tyrant skin, i just love the original tyrant design Wesker: imo an impractical skin i just want to see wld be his re5 final boss design, he just looks fucked up and i love it hvbhjhbhjhb Misc: 4: i only have one full idea and that's the plaga knights for knight, it just works really well hbhjhbghjhb 7: i absolutely love the idea of a re7 eveline skin for sadako/onryo but that's licensed on licensed so yknow, not gonna work hgvhjhgvhb, a lucas baker skin for legion would actually be so cool but they already have hunk, his build fits perfect for frank tho WAHHHHh i want that rlly bad now hes so yucky i love him hvhjhgbhb, marguerite baker while itd a be a stretch would be a really fucking cool skin for plague, her lantern would fit perfectly for plague's weapon and she could spit out bugs instead of vomit (i know that like, isnt something that go through the effort to do, i just think it's really cool hgvhjhgbh) and lastly jack baker would work really well for trapper, he honestly just fits perfectly ^^ 8: another licensed on licensed skin that wouldn't work but i love the idea of, donna beneviento/her doll angie for chucky, it'd genuinely work so well, just like in the game shed be in the background while angie takes front stage as chucky doing the killing, donna only actually appearing when picking up a surv just like charles ghost does for chucky, another legion skin idea,, (i love legion jhbhjhb) the dimitrescu daughters i think would really work well as skins for them but im also thinking theyd work for nurse! i feel like consider lady d's popularity shed be a skin people would want but i genuinely just don't see anyone she'd work for? plus her height makes things,, difficult jhbhjhbgh, i do have an idea for moreau! i think blight would work perfectly! lastly mother miranda... she'd have to be a skin for plague i think, but i could see nurse working too, i prefer plague tho hvbhjhbhb Pig: honestly i think she wouldnt be that hard to modify but that's probably just my lack of game design understanding, i think these concepts fall more into a "i just want to see these" mindset but i rlly think they're reasonable, i think a john kramer skin would be rlly good, already got his cloack basically modeled bvbhjhgbvhb, i also think in the same vein a hoffman skin would be rlly cool but i think thatd require a whole remodel Survivor concepts: Saw: i would've liked to see ppl like adam and lawrence or daniel (i love him but he rlly isnt important enough hghh) RE: 1: barry :3 i just love barry <3 4: ashley <3 she deserves to be in the game as a skin at least imo 5: excella gionne, shes an antagonist tho so i dunno, josh stone! i like josh a lot and i'd love if he were there 7/8: ethan winters! i really would love to see ethan in the game, i am a huge mia fan so i gotta say i would be so fucking happy with a re7 mia survivor with like a re8 look skin but i 100% want her base design to be re7, lastly just a skin of chris's re8 look :3

[sspextkr]

and what if I ship you with happiness

get it

like I've never been happy so it must be a fictional character (I'm hilarious)

JOKES ASIDE hmMMMM either Charlie or Todd from DPS. Someone gotta be the + to your - (math talk) man (neil)

.... am I making sense?? idk sorry.

Rev/happiness is my new otp

and !!! todd !!

no because I had the worst crush on Todd when I first watched the movie which has evolved into an even worse crush on ethan hawke himself 😭😭 I don't know if I want him or if I wanna be him yknow??

and charlie omg I think we could get along pretty well

you make sense dw. can't put it in words but I get what you mean

[chessere]

Music that reminds me of wintershur :')

To preface. I am a little bit tipsy and sleepy. What am I rambling about? Fucking guess baby. I don't know either.

Also this post is about songs that remind me of them. Not what they'd listen to. I mean. I think they would listen to this too. But there'd be a lot more britney spears involved. I have a very particular image of them in mind.

Anyways first of all ethan is a swingrowers guy and miles is a bear ghost guy no i do not take criticisms actually

He's trying to call out her name

But his love is still too far away

That part alone. That hits like a bitch. Mia winters you will always be famous.

Also because canon ethan is a jazz guy. Probably more of a frank sinatra person but something upbeat is nice!!! So electro swing it is!!!!!!

.......Yeah this is what happens when you let a guy who only listens to weeb music and electro swing make a playlist lmao

Now. Miles. My second favorite man with 8 fingers.

Both of these. It's the vibes for me and not much with the lyrics. You know which ones are about the lyrics though? both versions of the hound and the fox. They're SO miles upshur. The most upshur to ever upshured, even.

I can't catch my breath! Been working to the bone Dottin' on all the "i's" And crossin' every "t" I own This ain't pullin' thread No, baby this is war! I'll be the card to end their cash machine They'll rue the day the hound came to their door

The real crooks ain't wearin' ski masks No, they're walkin' around in suits They feed us lies in American wrapping They're just acting

It's so hard to choose which part fits the best because the entire song goes crazy. Good god i am so obsessed with it.

Speaking of I the mighty. Playing catch with .22 is such peak wintershur it's insane (delusional)

I've been thinking back to when we used to share a drink on midnight walks When you'd pretend your winter breath was cigarette smoke in your lungs I'd fight the urge to give you all the worst advice about the ones you liked (You called it chemistry, I called it earning bragging rights) Knowing damn well if I told you how I felt, I'd crack the ice Roll the dice

Oughghhhfhhhh...... Oghhufhhughuhhf........ No one said it'd be healthy yknow. I'm not very known to like ships where the people involved are happy without any conditions. Wintershur in particular is big on the side of being a situationship more than a relationship jfjdjHFJDJDJDJ

[allforhader]

New Perspective

Bill Hader x (F) Reader

Warnings: Langauge

Y/N has been childhood friends with Bill and she has always been supportive of what he wants to pursue in life. She’s watched him evolve into one of the greatest in her opinion and she’s been there for almost every major moment. Perks of being a fellow actor. You see a lot.

But with personal things. She was at his wedding, was in the chain of messages when it came to his girls coming to the world, and when he had his lowest moments...Y/N dropped everything to be by his side.

“You always have my back Y/N, how can I ever repay you”

“You don’t have to Bill. What are friends for?”

Apart of her never wanted to tell him that she had feelings. It felt and from the looks on how life played out, it was one-sided. Partners never came easy when her mind is obviously tied to something else. She knew that holding on was only going to hurt her, and it did. It did on most days but of course he always made them 100% better.

Y/N was there for him when he went through his divorce and not much was said. All he wanted was her to be there and that’s exactly what she did.

Now the two were given a movie opportunity and it’s been some time since they’ve worked together. This’ll be fun.

For the most part.

“Ms. Y/L/N” Bill smiles knocking on her open trailer door.

“Mr. Hader” Y/N smiles setting her highlighter down as Bill sits across from her in the booth. “Thought you were talking to the other star in this film”

“I was, she’s nice. But shouldn’t I be getting to know the main love interest for my character instead?” Bill smiles resting his head in his hands on the table.

“You’ve known me all your life Bill”

“Okay touché but I prefer hanging with my best friend on set any chance I get”

Y/N smiles hearing that as it also chipped at her for a moment.

“Are you staying at the hotel near by?”

“Yeah, ain’t gonna live in a trailer” Bill laughs a bit. “Have you checked in yet?”

“I just got in, so not yet”

“You can stay with me, my room got another bed”

“Y’know the film company got me a room to myself right?”

“Yeah but come on, it’s better being with someone than alone”

“Okay...” Y/N smiles seeing how excited he got hearing her agree.

Filming scenes out of order is very common and the two are used to it. Neither of them had an opinion of which to do first since their schedules were changed in order to film without interruptions. Only time something may happen is something with Bill’s girls. Other than that, they took things slow and did the easiest scenes to begin with.

“Oregon is a beautiful setting to film at”

“It beats the normal New York setting like a lot of films”

“True, do you want to get drinks next night out?”

“If you’re paying” Y/N smiles making Bill laugh as he wraps an arm around her shoulders.

The director a moment after had Y/N sit with him as they go over scenes with just Bill and the other interest. He wanted her to watch so that she can get a feel for her character but her character felt more real.

The main female lead, who’s love of their life is their best friend and he doesn’t know that she loves him until it’s too late.

At least the ending is happy. Sad to a degree but—yknow. Rooting for the main lead is the way to go for the most part.

“Be prepared to cry Y/N”

“That’s very unsettling director”

“Well you know your scenes”

“I do”

“You’ll do great” He smiles as Y/N continued to watch the two before getting up and leaving to go over her lines with herself.

Bill turns his attention to Y/N as the director stands up.

“BILL YOU RUINED THE TAKE”

“Sorry”

“TAKE THREE PEOPLE!”

A few months went by in filming as Y/N lays in the bed beside Bill’s thinking about the fact that they are doing one of her heartbreaking scenes. She didn’t want to do it but has to at the same time.

Y/N now in the makeup department scrolling through her phone as the crew worked on her makeup.

“Have you worked in a rainy state before?”

“Hm?” Y/N looks up from her phone catching a smile from the lovely woman doing her makeup. “Oh, yeah. But most of the time we are filming inside”

“True true...but it’s beautiful when it rains here in Oregon. Knock on wood that it doesn’t rain when we film but reading a few scenes with you in it. It’ll be beautiful if it did” She smiles touching up on her blush as Y/N was flattered but nervous.

After getting dressed in the causal outfit her character demands for, Y/N walks into set seeing the tents over the equipment just in case it does rain. She bumped into Bill adjusting herself once she caught her balance.

“Sorry Y/N”

“No I am, wasn’t looking”

“Well. It’s nice running into you than a stranger” Bill smiles fixing his blazer as Y/N wanted to say something then and there but

“Places please!” The director states as Y/N retracts herself walking over to her marker as Bill locks arms with the other love interest.

Bill stood at his placement seeing Y/N starting to count with her fingers. A habit from when they were younger, she did it when she got anxious. He never forgot the little things. He wanted to check up on her but the moment he heard action, he couldn’t.

Script Characters - Bill is Ethan, Y/N is Amelia, other love interest is Evelyn

“Love, you know how to make a girl’s night” The interest steals a kiss as Y/N’s chest started hurting.

“Evelyn, you are worth every moment. Which...is why I want to make it worth it” Bill smiles glancing around them and back to his interest. “The love of my life stands in front of me and it always feels like I’ve known you for all the years I’ve been on this earth. You...make it worth living every day in this chaotic world and I want to fight every day with you right beside me”

“Ethan...are you saying what I think your saying?”

“Every word”

Every word, stated for the wrong person. But Y/N didn’t know that. The director gestures for Y/N to start approaching and the scene and she drops her phone to her side.

“Hey Et—-“ Y/N steps forward before turning her body toward the camera retracting herself back when she saw Bill get down on one knee.

It’s a movie. Y/N, remember it’s a movie...

“Will you marry me Evelyn?”

“Yes! A thousand times yes!” She laughs as Bill picks the interest up spinning her in his arms before stealing a kiss.

The director looks at the shot on Y/N making them zoom in the moment the tears formed and rolled down her cheeks. He didn’t expect that, but it made it ten times better. He was about to yell cut to take another shot when the rain started.

Knock on wood my ass...

Y/N steps back not having anymore words from the scene as her body shifted quickly going behind the prop building but she slipped on her way. Bill quickly looked over after setting his interest down. A great shot. The director had them follow Y/N for the rest of the shot as the rain poured on them. She held her head down letting everything hit her.

This is fake

It’s a movie

These aren’t real characters

But this story feels too familiar...

Fuck.

Y/N brought her head up wiping away her tears as they came down but the rain made it difficult to differentiate. Perfect.

“Cut! THAT WAS FLAWLESS Y/N, SAME GOES TO YOU TWO! Flawless! Now get the hell out of the rain, we don’t want our stars getting sick” The director states helping his crew get the cameras and personnel out.

Bill took his blazer off as the interest’s assistant ran over with an umbrella for her, helping her off set as he makes his way to Y/N who hasn’t move from her spot. He covered her with the jacket not giving a damn if it was for his character. He didn’t want Y/N to get sick.

“Come on...” He held his hand out as Y/N took it carefully being brought up from the wet ground. “It’ll be hell if you got sick” he wrapped his arm around her hurrying her out of there.

After a while the two were in their hotel room, and as Bill got dressed in the bathroom, Y/N sat on her bed already out of the wet clothes and into something comfy as she dries her hair with a towel while the feelings lingered.

“That was an intense scene, one of the electrical people said the director wanted to get another shot until he saw how you were performing. Kept the scene going” Bill walks in sitting across from her on her bed. “You’re amazing you know that?”

“Haven’t heard it enough honestly” Y/N laughs a bit hugging herself as she rubs her arms to warm her.

“You sat in the rain for a while, why don’t take a hot bath. Maybe that’ll warm you up” Bill suggest watching her shake her head before trapping the pillow she wasn’t leaning against hugging it close.

“I’m okay Bill, I’ll be fine” Y/N smiles watching Bill move himself to be beside her. Keeping close brings warmth in ways.

“Come on. I don’t bite” Bill laughs as Y/N rolls her eyes before leaning against him feeling his arm wrap around her shoulders brining her close.

Warmth huh...

A few more months, a couple hundred shots, and more intense emotions that Y/N thought she could handle for the most part. Filming the wedding was killer when her character was best man and now was the money maker scene.

Confessing.

“Looking beautiful like always Y/N” The director smiles helping Y/N step down from the box after getting her dressed hemmed.

“I know it’s for the scene and the movie, I really hate pink” Y/N fixes her dress sighing.

“Well, it suits you. Don’t have to wear it long. One more scene where Amelia grows fed up over the reality and storms out of the reception catching Ethan’s attention. Then the confession” He smiles going to his crew and talking about the trolly shots as Y/N sighs going to her marker.

“Wow”

Y/N turns around catching Bill’s attention making her smile with a tint of pink growing.

“You look beautiful”

“You saw me in this dress yesterday”

“Well, I’m simply stating facts and I like complimenting you” Bill says with a hint of nervousness in his voice. “I uh. Well! Time to get in position. Right?”

“Right...”

Once the cameras were in place with the wall separating the scene in two shots. The trolly camera being set on the one outside and the other having two cameras set on both main characters. Y/N stood in her spot hearing action as she leans against the wall watching Bill enjoy himself in his own little world. She took a deep breath resting her hand on her chest before stepping out.

“Why did I do this? Why did I sign onto this...I shouldn’t have. Shouldn’t have stayed. I should’ve left a long time ago...”

“Amelia—“

Y/N froze along with the camera as it planned to Bill but he didn’t care for that.

“Where...where are you going? The reception barely even started”

“I know...I just...”

“Just what?” Bill rests a hand on her shoulder getting pushed off but it felt personal. “Amelia...”

“Sorry. I can’t stay”

“What do you mean?!”

“I CANT STAY” Y/N shot back snapping as Bill took a step back. “I can’t stay and watch this go on”

“What does that mean? You’re not...You’re not acting like yourself Amelia”

“Ethan...I-...” Y/N felt her face heat up staring at Bill as she suddenly started crying. “I love you...I have always loved you...a-and I can’t stand there and watch you move onto the next chapter of your life...without me”

“Amelia...why didn’t—-“

“BECAUSE I WAS AFRAID”

The director read the script knowing this isn’t what he written and Bill knew instantly.

“I was afraid to ever say anything because you...you were all I cared about. I cared about every single thing you did and everything that happened to you. Because...it either hurt you or put you in a state of mind that i couldn’t always help you out of” Y/N felt her body shake as she clenched her fists. “Every chance I got...you were always with someone. Always in love with somebody and I knew it was never going to be me. Because I’m not...I’m not the love of your life. I never was...”

“A-Amelia please don’t go—“ Bill grabbed her wrist the moment she stepped away and Y/N ripped her hand away not looking at him.

“I love you...I always will....and the only thing that’ll help me get over you...is never being around you ever again” Y/N states as that last part was scripted but the first two lines were all her in the voice of her character.

Y/N stormed off as Bill stood there feeling his anxiety course through his body watching her go.

“Ethan?” The interest interrupts as the scene was continuing. But he didn’t want to continue filming.

Bill looks at the director hearing him say cut as he instantly ran after Y/N.

Y/N had no more scenes that day and Bill searched for her all over set and even went to her trailer before being called back. The director told him to give her space since he didn’t know what went on there and as stupid as some directors are. He’s going to use that shot but of course he himself was going to check up on her actress when they got Bill back in makeup.

“Y/N” He knocked on her hotel room door, this time in hers and not in the one she shared.

“Please. Give me a minute”

“I’m not asking you back to set. The shot was fine. If you don’t mind me using it of course”

“God I don’t care if you use it or not. I just...I full on confessed how I felt all of these years of being friends with Bill and...it just. Blew up in my face”

“Bill left set looking for you. He’s back because it’s your guys job not to leave unless it was an emergency. But you have no more filming and...he was upset that he didn’t find you before we brought him back to set”

“Sir, you don’t know the personal stuff about this”

“I know you two have been friends for years, and you have chemistry. Chemistry that would work amazingly playing as friends or lovers. I also know this is your first film as a major love interest and what you told me, it would’ve gone differently if the partner wasn’t Hader”

“God...”

“Get dressed out of that dress and come back on set. If I can guess how he’s feeling. He won’t work like this”

“Isn’t that the point of Ethan’s character? To be emotionally bombarded by what Amelia said?”

“I love that you know every minor detail in my story, but Y/N. His character’s reality. Became his. Knowing that you’re not okay...he won’t work properly even for the character” the director left going back to continue hoping Y/N would come onto set.

A few shots went by and they were re-taken two or three times do to Bill not being in the right headspace. He looks over to the crew watching them discuss what they just shot and before the director asked for places again, Bill saw Y/N stand beside him looking at him for a moment then to the screens.

“Bill, are you okay?” His other co star asks as Bill was in his own world.

“I’m going through it...”

When the work day was over, Y/N knocked on Bill’s trailer watching it instantly open as Bill steps out looking at her. The silence was killer and Y/N didn’t really know what to say since she has already said it.

“I’m so—“

“Don’t.”

“Bill—“

“Don’t apologize for something you kept to yourself for years...I wish you didn’t keep it to yourself for years”

“Your life moves faster than mine Bill. I’m...just. Behind”

“You’re not. You just...why did you put me before you always? You would’ve said something sooner if—“

“Bill just shut up” Y/N frowns. “You’re my best friends. That’s why I did it. But the confessing? I didn’t tell you how I felt because...because life got in the way. You fell in love on a few occasions and I watched. I couldn’t butt in every time! You wouldn’t have the life you have if I did!”

“Y/N, I do love the life I have. I can’t lie about that even if I tried. But...you can’t just stand there and assume I never felt the same way” Bill frowns as Y/N felt her face heat up when he said that.

“I-....For fuck sake Hader”

“Y/L/N. You assume a lot. But for my sake. Can you tell me how you feel without having to do it in a scene to do so?”

“Well. Spit it out then”

“I love you too, and I’m sorry it took you this long to say anything. But I’m also sorry...that I didn’t do it first” Bill instantly presses his lips against hers maneuvering his arm around her waist bringing her close to his chest.

Y/N grabbed his shirt keeping him close to her and taking in the moment as she continues to kiss him. The moment air was needed, Bill didn’t wait long to kiss her again.

They both had enough of waiting, for this new perspective.

[warrenthealien]

Yknow I was sobbing almost hysterically when we got to thirty minutes, and I know I’ll feel that again at some point but right now? I’m smiling without even trying. Because I also feel this satisfaction and love in my heart for everything Unus Annus and the people involved have accomplished. I didn’t expect that. I feel warm inside. It’s over, and it was so, so perfect from beginning to end.

My heart hurts, but it’s also glowing, if that makes any sense. There’s a new moon tonight and I think it’s very fitting... it’s an end, but it’s also a new beginning. A rebirth.

My biggest fear about the channel dying wasn’t the death itself, but like why most of us fear death, I feared what comes after. I, and everyone involved changed so much in one year, and I in a way feared that it would all be reset for some reason.... like all the progress would just dissapear if there was no proof it happened. But that’s not true, there is proof, because it’s inside the growth we’ve all gone through. I was so scared that Mark and Ethan and everyone involved wouldn’t care for some reason, but clearly they do. They are changed as the rest of us our changed, and I am so happy we all went on this journey together.

Congratulations everyone... we all crossed the finish line. Now, we have endless possibilities of where we go from here.

Recently I was thinking about Unus Annus, and what the heck we are all going to do after, and I remembered a scene from Tangled, which sounds odd but the dialogue I remembered is fitting I think, for what comes now.

Rapunzel asks Eugene about what it will be like if her dream comes true the way she always hoped it would: “What do I do then?”

And his response: “Well that’s the good part, I guess... you get to go find a new dream.”

Share on this post if you want, I want to know; what do you guys want to accomplish now and that Unus Annus is over? What goals do you have? And not just bullshit goals that you feel you have to accomplish, I mean really... what do you truly want to do? You guys won’t hear about it when I do, because I want this to be a purely anonymous account, but I want to finally start posting on youtube. And yes, Unus Annus inspired me to finally do that... I was so scared of what others would think, but I’m not scared anymore. I want to start putting together the poetry novel I wanted to make, and I want to start my horror anthology. I want to start making edits, maybe posting them to an account based off of this tumblr. I want to make short films, maybe fan films because right now those are my favorite ideas. I want to start streaming on twitch. All in all, I want to pursue my creative passions that I have wanted to for so long, and was too scared to pursue.

What about you guys?

[wiinterrose]

          ( xavier serrano , male , he/him, 23 ) omg ! i was walking yonge street downtown , and you’ll never guess who i saw . 𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐄𝐋 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐒 ! i just saw a post about them on sixsecrets ! i think it said something like “ 𝐌𝐈𝐊𝐄𝐘 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐒 𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑'𝐒 𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐄 𝐀𝐓 𝟓 𝐀𝐌 : 𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐎𝐑 𝐘𝐄𝐓 𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆 ?” . isn’t that wild ? i guess it makes sense through , since they’re apparently 𝐃𝐔𝐏𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐒 and 𝐂𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 . but i’ve heard they’re also 𝐎𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐂 and 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐂 ! i’ll just stick to giving them the benefit of the doubt . i mean , it’s not like i know them personally — they’re a famous 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐑 / 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐔𝐁𝐄𝐑 ! you know , i’ve actually heard rumors that ██████████████████, but they’re just rumors … i think . i dunno . if you happen to run into them , tell them i’m their biggest fan ! ( ollie , they / them , 21 , est )

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘

— mikey was born and raised in winnipeg because i think it’s funny when characters are from winnipeg. if you’re from winnipeg i’m so sorry. definitely was born on the coldest day of that year ( so like some point in january )

— but because of those long, cold harsh winters, mikey found himself in a dance studio a lot. his aunt was a dance teacher and with rather absent parents who meant well but both had long hours at the local hospital, he spent a lot of time with her. he fell in love with dance pretty early on, always having a certain fluidity and grace even when he was young.

— random but he also played hockey up until he was like 16 or whatever because he’s canadian and i’m not stupid. it happened. he can still skate tho. in a slightly different life he probably would have been a pretty good figure skater huh 🤔🤔🤔 but anyway...

— also feel like it makes sense that he did gymnastics. and trained in classical ballet.

— he went to university of toronto for college, studying kinesology and dance, and danced at one of the prestigious studios in the city.

— his big break moment was when in his sophomore year at ut, he made it onto the second season of world of dance in early 2017 ( lets pretend that show has been on longer than it has bc i don’t want it to be the first season of it sldk ). he made it all the way to the finals and quickly become a fan favorite along the way. though he ultimately placed second and missed out on the million dollars, that was the beginning of many doors opening for him. ( for those who, might have the vaguest clue what i’m talking about : i’m highkey feeling like, michael dameski style which is an idea i had after i named him michael so don’t @ me for him having the same first name ).

— millions watched that show, including some prominent agents and scouts who were able to help him launch a professional dance career : something he never thought he’d see himself actually doing. his first big gig was making the dance team for some singer’s north american tour, and he ended up not returning to ut to pursue a professional dance career full time. since then he’s danced in a few music videos for some uber famous musican ( same one he went on tour with or not idk ?? also a wc ?? maybe ?? ), a tv show, couple movies, and other various gigs around the city. he works part time at a studio when he has time, and has been honing his choreography skills as well.

— he makes enough dancing, but certainly not enough to make him RICH. no, that come from an impromptu vlog he did while on tour with aforementioned singer. having already garnered a following from world of dance, he soon rose to youtube fame as well, something he never could have predicted. i feel like his videos are very just, day in a life with various random challenges mixed in, and various workout and flexibility tips. he also still does pieces and duets with other prominent dancers just for fun too. his natural charisma and attitude really just carries him through easily lmao.

— mikey developed a bit of a habit of sleeping around when he left for college, all the newfound freedom was just intoxicating and well. he was hot so. it wasn’t like it was hard alsdkjf. that stuck around well into his blossoming dance career. nothing that was enough to be scandalous, but he made his way around. and then a year and a half into this unforeseen new life, he met matthew glass.

— he’d had a couple serious relationships before, one in high school, one his freshman year of college but neither of them could hold a flame to what he felt when he was with matt. perfection wasn’t something mikey believed in, but he almost did with what they had.

— it was like for over a year and a half he lived in this insane dream, and then mikey and matt broke up and he was devastated ( behind closed doors and with curtains pulled tightly shut ).

— he then proceeded to broadcast how perfectly fine he was doing by going back to his old ways and sleeping around obsessively, this time with very little regard as to how many headlines he was making. as far as coping mechanisms go, i guess sex is better than alcohol ?? not to say he wasn’t also drunk at times l o l.

𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐂

— mikey is a... how do u say... im gunna write manwhore bc it’s accurate so pls don’t take offense. inch resting bc i’ve written smut like once in my eight year rping career but that’s what he decided he was gunna be and who am i to deny that.

— very bi. very much does not care. if the world didn’t know he was before, it definitely does now lmao. he hasn’t come out in the sense he’s like posted a video about it and said “i’m bisexual” but it’s pretty obvious from the media and maybe he has gotten asked in interviews and has just shrugged and been like does it matter ?? i’m sorry he’s not the vocal bi ally we need. perhaps we will work on that.

— hasn’t dated anyone since matt bc he’s highkey lowkey still hung up on him but no one needs to know that right. outwardly, he’s very much the same : seemingly happy, but he’s a lot more careful with his heart and letting people close to him. if anything he’s become a bit of a two-way mirror, always seeing out but never really letting people see in, just what they want to see.

— probably goes without saying but extremely flexible. idk if any of you know who juuse saros is but apparently he can twerk in a split and i’m not saying mikey can but like. he just might be able to...

— straight up does not get cold. never wears more than a hoodie, probably danced shirtless in the middle of winter just fine. at least being from winnipeg is good for one ( 1 ) thing.

— i feel like people call him flower. idk guys. maybe im just thinking too much abt hockey goalies.

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘

— he tends to be extremely underestimated as he comes across a bit dumb and generally has a pretty positive outlook on life which people confuse for him being naive when that isn’t the case. but he’s found he can use that it his advantage and that sometimes, people will tell him things they think he can’t understand but he hears and remembers everything. it’s helped him out of a few difficult situations before.

— i feel like he has a bit of ethan dolan’s personality & dumbass energy idk guys...

— live in the moment kind of dude. his motto is probably like : you just gotta know what you want to do next. i mean looking back on his life it’s been pretty crazy and that’s only solidified his outlook that like, you really can’t control too much. just let it go where it takes you.

— people do like him though and they like talking to him for whatever reason. generally has pretty trustworthy vibes but he’s more slippery than he comes across. he’s a selfish person at heart and always has his own best interests in mind, even if it doesn’t seem that way at first.

— extroverted. i think ??

𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄

— 6′1″. chocolate brown eyes. curly brown hair. he has a lithe but extremely fit build due to his career. his core strength is especially impressive. 

— he has a monochromatic lineart tattoo of a rose on his left forearm / wrist and a butterfly ( again monochromatic & just lineart ) on his right shoulder. small scar at the base of his neck by his ear from an unfortunate hockey accident.

— needs glasses but usually only wears contacts unless he’s in his apartment late at night.

— he’s not overly fashionable, going more for comfort than how he generally looks. on a regular day, he’s probably got the whole... college athlete look going if you know what i mean. a big fan of mirrored aviator sunglasses. wouldn’t know what dressing up meant even if it slapped him in the face.

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

first and foremost i want to say that i like to vibe and brainstorm with people to come up with unique connections between our characters but here are a few ideas:

— the singer whose tour he danced on — singer whose music videos he’s been in — mayhaps even actors for that tv show / movie he was in ( v small role but whatevs. maybe they just Vibed yknow ) — flirtationship 😔 — always ye ol good hookup l o l — we keep running into each other idk maybe we should talk ??

TAKEN CONNECTIONS PAGE HERE

𝐎𝐎𝐂

          hey guys, i’m ollie. my intros are either written really eloquently or a big mess bc im trying to rub together a couple braincells at 1 am and whatever comes out, comes out. no need to guess which category this one falls into lmAO. anyway, i’m a slow plotter bc i’m easily overwhelmed trying to do too many things at once but i swear i will try to get to as many people as i can. and yeah this entire character is inspired by my love of world of dance don’t @ me... if u made it all the way down here u should watch this bc 😳 & mikey has the same athleticism and strength.

[himbos-hotline]

whats a god au?

I saw a gif of marks god of night and my brain is not leaving me alone.So god turned human AU

Im stealing marks god of the night and making it so he controls like the stars in the sky and the nighttime and all things dark and midly creepy and spooky and Meredith being the complete opposite. The one who makes all the good and makes flowers grow and the world happy and good. And theyre always linked together yknow like "night and day" and "light and darkness" so theyve grown up together. They are always linked and together and oh the forbiddan love that blossoms between the two of them!

They never really get the ability to interact cuz timezones [ like they talk while they work but like dont spend all the timetogether. Theyrealways together cuz their skills are linked but they consistantly seperated just by fate and time] and the sun setting as the moon rises and but they adore the way that the other works. Mark gazing down at earth with awe at meri making flowers bloom and Meredith squinting at the stars while she looks for his face.

Mark fucks up his job and the head god [ive not named him yet] punishes mark with the threat of throwing him to earth as a human and taking away his immortality Meredith, not wanting to be without her friend, she sacrifies her job as being a goddess and the two of them are thrown to earth as people

They loose their immortality but they finally get to be with each other, they get to talk and make friends and converse and their love floods them slowly, they get replaced and the two of them choose to stay with each other as humans. They'll grow and age and exist together and for the two of them thats enough.

I already have the name for it

My designs here:

Meredith's Goddess form

Marks God form

I am working on ethans and bobs and allu's atm cuz I didnt like what the picrew had so im gonna draw

[ao3-writer]

The B Word (4/4)

  At first, it took them some time to readjust back to their old patterns. As unhealthy as their new patterns might be, it didn’t seem to bother anybody for a while. 

  Amy was the first to tick. She began to take Chica out for long walks, the walks could have lasted 30 minutes to 2 hours. Nobody really questioned, in fact, Mark would even urge Amy whenever she looked uncomfortable or antsy if she’d rather walk Chica for a while. Some days she’d just stare at the wheels on Ethan’s chair for a while, and whenever he’d look over at her, she’d turn her gaze and pretend like she was doing something else.

  Tyler was next, not too soon after Amy. He would work out excessively. Some days he wouldn’t even show up to work because he worked himself to sleep by the time he got home and took a shower. Tyler looked exhausted. One day he showed paler than ever and Kathryn practically force fed him food when they went out to lunch. Every now and then he would offer to help Ethan whenever he’d need it, but he usually spent his time avoiding the younger man.

  Mark... Mark was something else. He could only seem to look at Ethan directly in his face. Any lower and... he’d feel a bitter feeling inside his gut. It was guilt, definitely, but there was something else that just... pricked at his skin. All he could do was watch as he rolled himself on his wheelchair, sit on the chair lift that carried him up the stairs, and spring back into his chair where he’d calmly go to his desk. Mark wanted to help Ethan so badly, he just wanted to help him with everything but all he could do was watch. The crash wasn’t his fault, yet Mark still felt directly linked to the tragedy.

   “Amy,” Mark called out, her eyes snapped away from the wheels as she looked over at Mark. He barely shook his head before she smiled and brushed her hair back.

   “Sorry, what’s up?” Amy asked, scooting her chair closer to Mark.

  One quick glance at the wheels and Amy understood what Mark was about to say... for the billionth time. Kathryn walked by and placed a hand on Amy’s shoulder before proceeding to her own laptop. She knew nothing of that hectic night, yet she still managed to pity and take care of all of them. She helped Ethan the most out of any of the others. She offered to wheel him around, or even fetch anything he needed so that he didn’t have to move. She’d help him onto the carrier, she’d drive him around town. She was the glue holding them together at this point.

  Tyler was at his own device, headphones on his head, eyes glued to the screen. The silence was almost deafening, minus the occasional clatter of keyboards and mouses clicking. Then their fragile boundary between good and bad shattered.

   “Sorry, it’s just... odd. yknow, seeing him like this. I just... I sometimes still have nightmares of that night. The phone call, the drive, the... the everything,” Amy attempted to whisper. Ethan didn’t seem to be plugged in however, as he swung around and stared at Amy.

   “I’m right here, you know,” he mumbled.

   “Sorry, Eth,” Amy replied.

   “No, no. Go ahead. It’s fine. I don’t mind you talking about me like I’m not here. I especially don’t mind how you guys walk on eggshells around me. I’m not fragile, okay. I can handle it,” Ethan said, voice laced with malice. 

  Mark took a deep breath. “It’s not that. We don’t think you’re fragile. You’re pretty tough, Eth,” Mark said, attempting a smirk.

  Ethan scoffed. “Is that because I somehow managed to survive a crash or because I’m able to wheel myself around like some Hot Wheels toy,” Ethan muttered.

   “Ethan...” Amy began before Ethan slapped his hand on his desk angrily. He let out a menacing chuckle, a smile etched on his face.

   “No, Amy. It’s fine. I-i’m fine. It’s you guys that are the problem,” He snapped. Tyler slid the headphones off and rested them on his neck, looking over at the commotion. Kathryn idly sat to the side, a paper hanging from her fingers as she watched as well.

   “How are we the problem?” Amy defended, suddenly offended.

   “Hey, hey, there is no problem at all, okay? Nobody is the problem--” Mark attempted to diffuse the oncoming argument but was interrupted by Amy.

   “We’re trying to help you, Ethan. It’s not our fault that you don’t want it.”

  Ethan laughed, bitterly, but a laugh nonetheless. “Oh and why do I need help? Is it because i’m a cripple? Sorry, if I could just make my legs come back to life and carry me out the door, then I would.”

   “Ethan, don’t you pin this on--”

   “If I could just take this wheelchair and throw it out, I would probably be less of a fucking charity case. You know, I truly am sorry that I am such a problem for you, Amy. And for the rest of you, too.”

  Tyler began to twiddle his fingers anxiously and Kathryn was ready to intervene. Mark looked at Ethan with a pained expression. Then at Amy. Why were they being like this? Everything was going fine!

   “You’re not a problem, Ethan.There isn’t a problem at all. We’re here for you because we care, not because we pity you,” Kathryn explained.

  Another scoff. “That’s a lie and you know it, Kathryn.”

   “She’s right, Ethan. We’re willing to help you because we’re your friends--” Tyler added.

   “Shut up! Just shut up! I don’t want this. I-i don’t want your sympathy o-or your pity! I’m just so sick of it,” Ethan exclaimed. 

   “We’re not pitying you, Ethan--”

   “Shut up, Mark! If anything, you’re the cause of this!” Ethan shouted, tears springing in his eyes. 

  And that was the final blow. Mark felt a pain in his chest when he said that. All he could do was lean back in his chair, stunned by his words.

   “Ethan!” Amy scolded.

   “Oh please, don’t tell me none of you ever thought of that,” Ethan hissed. Mark was quiet. Kathryn shook her head.

   “Ethan, I think you need some air,” She decided, standing up and walking towards him.

   “No, get away from me. I can do it myself. Get away!” Ethan shouted as he pushed himself off the chair, crumpling to the ground. Kathryn ran over, grabbing one of his arms but all he did was shake her off as he lay there.

  His sobs began to fill the room. Tyler was still sitting down, his eyes cast down in guilt. Amy looked over at the handicapped with sadness and Kathryn stood helplessly next to him. Mark sat quietly in his chair before finally speaking up. “Can I have a... moment with him?”

 Nobody moved. 

  The silence began to stretch before Kathryn made the first move and treaded past Ethan, making her way down the stairs. Tyler bolted up and followed her in a rush. Amy placed a hand on Mark’s arm before soon following, steps slow and careful. Once the door downstairs closed, Ethan rose his head and stared up at Mark.

   “Did you mean it?” Mark asked, voice wavering. He did his best not to try, but with each passing second it became harder to do so.

   “I...” there was a beat of silence before Ethan finished, “...yeah. A little bit.”

 A tear slipped past Mark’s eye, trailing down his cheek. He cursed quietly and threw his head into his hands. Ethan remained on the carpet, he stared at Mark with a wash of relief over him.

   “I’m sorry... you shouldn’t be directly blamed for this... but I just can’t help but ponder that night over and over again. And if you hadn’t... been there... if you hadn’t made that joke... then this probably would’ve never happened.”

  Mark squeezed his eyes shut and hoped that the negative voice in his head would just go away.

   “I’m sorry... I’ve tried to be a good friend and help you through this but I... I feel as guilty as you make me out to be,” Mark whispered.

  Ethan sighed. At this point he was either going to be honest or never say it. So he followed his gut, “Good friends don’t do bad things to their friends.”

  There it was. The B word. Bad. Mark was a Bad friend. He was a Bad person.

  “I’m sorry...” was all Mark could say. He stood up, lifted Ethan effortlessly back into his wheelchair before staring down at him, wet eyes.

  Ethan brushed him off and looked away, his eyes drying eyes looking at his computer monitor to distract him of Mark’s pleading eyes. The movement tore at Mark’s heartstrings.

  “Thanks... you can go or... whatever,” Ethan whispered. Mark’s heart could’ve broken by then, but all he did in response was lean down and kiss Ethan’s forehead for a few seconds, a tear slipping off his chin and landing in his hair. “Please don’t do this...” Ethan whispered, “don’t make me regret what I said. I’ve been needing to say it for so long...”

  The pain in Mark’s chest was not alleviating any time soon, in fact it only throbbed and made him feel worse. He wanted to puke. He wanted to scream. He wanted to just... take it all back. But he couldn’t. So he let go of Ethan and he let the pain consume him.

  Ethan turned his head... so Mark let the darkness consume him. Not all stories have happy endings... Mark had to learn that the hard way.

[ts-akhmim]

Episode 1 | Part. 1 “Can I Kick the Tomb?”- Kendall

Me before Day 1 of Hosts: “I really am excited to be back and playing my official last season of Tumblr Survivor (and ORG) ever.” *40 SEASONS LATER*

https://66.media.tumblr.com/9abe7e9a250f88588980b89fdbc5bd6f/tumblr_pj4lahOlsg1s34uqa_400.gifv

I’m back for another shot and I’m thrilled to see where this goes! It’s been three years since I last played an ORG so I can’t wait to see how much Tumblr Survivor has changed. And who knows, maybe I’ll be lucky this time around. The main thing I’m looking to accomplish this time around is that I have fun! I feel like I took my previous seasons way too seriously (what can I say, I’m competitive) and I feel like that clouded my judgement. I mean, I’d like to win too!! But I want to be able to enjoy myself and make friendships that last a long time outside of this game. Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, I am currently at home as an unemployed college graduate. So, I feel like this is the perfect time for me to get back into the Tumblr Survivor community and get another shot at an ORG before my life gets busy again. In the past, ORGs have really conflicted with my work/life structure. That’s mainly why I said I’d never do orgs again, because I hated having internal mental breakdowns in public. I didn’t think I’d give it another go around, but now that I don’t have work/school to focus on. And since I have no idea how long this pandemic will last, might as well find ways to occupy my time through ORGs. I feel like I have done almost everything one can do on Tumblr Survivor… except win. Here is a quick summary of the games I played previously to help me reflect on what I can improve upon this time around. First time around, I was a mid-merge boot in Maluku after I was exposed for flipping on the fans and lost everyone’s trust. In Newfoundland, I was sapphire idoled out as an early merge boot for being in charge of the dominant alliance. In Ancient Greece, I was a 4th place robbed goddess after literally controlling the whole game and cut loose by my alliance right before FTC. And in Hosts, I flipped on my OG alliance after finding out people in the alliance wanted me out and got runner-up. So I hope that I can change things around this season and HOPEFULLY win (I’ll cry if I’m a pre-merge boot). My strategy going into this game is just to get to know people on a human level and allow them to think I’m someone who will follow commands/take orders. I don’t want to be the person deciding who goes home, but I want people to feel comfortable talking their every game move with me. Perception is key for this game, so if my allies think they can drag me to the end I’m going to let them think that. I’m hoping with that perception, I can be a subtle move maker this season. Almost as if no one sees me coming for them. I find that my fault in previous seasons is that I either put myself in the leadership role, or I’m too far in the bottom that I’m criticized for all decisions I make. I’m hoping that I have trust for those who are in the alliance within the alliance so that we can eventually overthrow whoever the person in charge is. For now, I just want to socialize and get to know people and hope that by increasing the social game the strategy will all fall into place. One thing that does scare me going into this season is possible pre-existing relationships. I’ve been out of Tumblr Survivor for the past three years and honestly have no idea what happened in previous seasons. I also don’t really keep up with anyone in the community either, so I’m going in with almost zero connections. This could be a good thing or a bad thing. The good thing is that it allows me to form genuine relationships with them, and I can ensure to my alliance that I’m 100% loyal to them going forward. Numbers are important, so if my tribe sees me as a number it would indicate. The bad thing is that if people know each other, then they could easily get me out if they choose to do so. Especially if they know my reputation as a “flipper” and think I won’t be trustworthy going into a merge/endgame. So I’m hoping that if I have a strong presence on night 1 that I can be included in the alliances and get my way into the majority. Because the last thing I’d want is to be Ethan Zohn’d out of the game. Waiting all this time just to be pre merge would be TRAGIC. Overall, I’ve grown over the past three years and I hope that I can reflect that onto this season. Since I last played an ORG, I came out to everyone through social media and I’ve been able to increase my self-confidence. Last time I played I just finished my freshmen year of college. Now, I’m graduating and going to attend graduate school to get my masters degree. I feel like I’ve grown and matured as a person, so I’m going into this season almost as a completely different person. There’s no holding myself back from anyone and I know that at the end of the day, I’m just here to have fun. So I’m ready for this big adventure that’s ahead of me, because I’m hoping to finish my last ORG (forreal) on a high note!

okay so the season hasn't even started yet and in a shock to nobody i'm already cracked out of my mind? i have fully been spiralling and researching who could possibly also be in the cast based on their avatars? i'm not gonna embarrass myself and put who i have predicted because whenever i put that in a confessional im always wrong without fail? anyway so thought i'd put what my plan is here SO when i completely do not follow this i can look back at myself for being a clown? BUT anyway this season coming back as a winner is very, very scary. it looks like i am going to be the only winner on my tribe, and one of only three winners in the entire game which is very very scary. also last season i was able to kind of operate from a position of being super underestimated? like nobody had eyes on me and that allowed me to get away with murder, and this season i need to play with a consistent awareness that people will... know what shenanigans i'm pulling and always will be tentative to let me play unrestricted. also i am so happy about being on the brawn tribe - that is SUCH a good landing spot for me. i would hate to be a winner put on a tribe for social ability (beauty), or strategic ability (brain)... it also means hopefully i could be in a tribe with less social people who are just challenge beasts, so as long as i am pulling my weight in challenges hopefully can wriggle my way in? the avatars on my tribe are real hard to place, two are not players i even recognise and from looking at the wiki - my only guess is someone called jake from generations is na'onka? just because he is also on the record page for immunity wins... so we will see? i'm just very very worried that i'm going to become alienated for being a former winner but i really. really hope that's not the case! in general... my aim is to just make jury, there are gonna be like no winners in this cast and there are going to be such eyes on me accordingly, so i need to play much more round by round, with a survival mentality? this season is gonna be a disaster for me but we will see how it goes NNNN.

I’m back… somehow! It’s kinda crazy how this is my sixth season of Tumblr Survivor (and my first TS game in like almost two years) but I was just wanting to play. I’ve done just about everything you can do in TS (leave premerge, participate in a Redemption Island duel, be a tribe swap captain, win individual immunity, have an idol, have a double vote, go home with an advantage, be the last person from your original tribe, leave in a rock draw, negate votes with an idol, and make it to the end)... except win, I haven’t quite been able to do that just yet! However, that is all gonna change in Akhmim and I’m sending that in stone. (watch me be a clown and leave first gfbndms). I don’t know, I just really want to prove myself as a capable player yknow? Ultimately, I’m here to look cute, chew bubblegum and kick ass. (‘:

Oh my god, synapses are firing all throughout my brain right now. I didn't prepare myself well enough for this season, but...I have friends here! LMAO! Jordan and Liam L are two people I know very well, I've seen Jakey around on FB, and I've spotted Ali on Discord! I'm hoping I can just integrate myself well enough cause there's a lot happening for me right now...

So I’m on Hathor which is the Beauty Tribe which… does not surprise me at all really? Not saying that I’m pretty or anything but I got 2 brain cells and suck at challenges so being a Beauty was my only option oop. That being said, looking at my Tumblr Survivor ~career~, I’ve only gotten 7 votes (only 5 that count) in the last 3 seasons that I played where I got 6th, 12th, and 2nd place SO that must mean I’m doing something right to be in people’s good graces? With that in mind, I want to be the Belle of the Ball and be the cutest beauty here so people wanna love me, protect me, and work with me <3

Jess, 6:51 PM Unfortunately, you have not entered the Tomb.. 6:52 PM Can I kick the Tomb? Alyssa, 6:52 PM you can 6:52 PM I kick the tomb Alyssa, 6:52 PM Unfortunately you have not entered the tomb

oh gorl. i cant believe it ladies and gays we're BACK BACK BACK AGAIN.... thanks coronavirus for completely putting my life on pause making me unemployed and able to have the time to do this again? No but on a serious note who in the hell would've guessed little old me coming back out HOPEFULLY one last time, and my mission this time is quite simple. WIN ALREADY BITCH. ITS ABOUT TIME, ITS ENOUGH, WE'RE TIRED. This will officially be my third time playing tumblr survivor, so lemme try and give yall a quick recap just so everyone knows a little bit about me. My very first time playing, I was an extremely young and naive 17 year old who was COMPLETELY tripping, yet it somehow worked for me and I made it to day 39 in og egypt. However, I didnt get a damn vote so that's when I first realized maybe I got some growing to do.... Fast forward to 2 years later, i was 19, moved out of my parents house, living on my own, so a little bit of character development on my own part, and it reflected in my game so much. I was learning from my mistakes and it got to a point where...i legitimately had a shot to win!! I was being smart and strategic, but, I made one mistake that cost me everything when I was so close, top 5, not too bad. 3 years later, and here we are. I'm still living on my own, im no longer that ugly ducking baby adam but now im slowly on my path to mother goose moment! im in a place in my life where im not only physically feeling myself, but I now know who I really am. With age comes wisdom and another chance at tumblr survivor!! Being this is my 3rd time I absolutely want to go all out. I want to WIN. Im so ready, especially on a season like this, brains vs. braun vs. beauty, one of my favorite twists especially because beauty just means so much to me. Not even in like a vain way honestly, like yeah i know im a bad bitch i know im a cutie physically but to me being a beauty is being able to really have a sense of CHARM about you and being able to get whatever you want with it Looking back at my games in tumblr survivor, and in life in general, i usually get my way with the help of my big mouth. I'm absolutely not the best in the challenges, and i might not always be the one who's able to come up with a big plan, but one thing about me thats for sure is im always one to find my way in the know somehow. In both my seasons I played with a very similar approach, first i assess my tribe and everyone in the game and see how workable i feel with people, and from there on i start building relationships. It's like gardening, you find the people you connect the most with, and build from there, and the ones i dont, i simply wont waste my time with and theyll be the ones i vote out, but ultimately as long as it aint me, then oop sorry to these people not me already writing a whole book and i havent even started talking about anyone but MYSELF YET DSFFHJKAFH.....im so sorry @hosts pls forgive me i warned yall i go on and on but ANYWHO ill try to wrap this up. Basically, im in love with my tribe right now, ive obviously talked to everyone and been having really good conversations with Augusto and Kendall. I really like them and could definitely see myself aligning with them. But aside from them I was honestly GAGGED AND GOOPED to see some familiar faces even on this TRIBE. AMIR is someone who i know from way back when in my tumblr candicestewart days when i was raising hell, we were mutuals but havent spoken since so years really, however in a game like this you can take the tiniest bit of association and use it as a groundwork for trust, so stay tuned for that...also AJ?????? me and him have spoken every now and then through various communities we fall into so thats another interesting dynamic, im not sure how anyone feels about me but im hoping they just like me enough not to be the first boot... Also im really glad there doesnt seem to be a lot of juggernaut type players here, my last season was challengers vs. champions so there was a LOT going on with 10 winners and 10 challenger, but speaking of that season i almost forgot to mention JAKE???? JAKE IS BACK TOO???? this.....could be really bad for me. For those who dont know, in cvc, me/jake/jessy had an iconic alliance because of our ~herstory together which stems back to us all being 14/15, and yeah i worked with them for as long as i could, but jake basically ran a cult on challengers vs champions which obviously i wasnt a target as long as i had them as shields by my side so we worked well together, until final 6 that is when i made my move and my vote was the reason jake went home. My whole season people kept saying adam just wants to sleep and play their game, when the truth was, im no dummy, i always knew id have to turn on them, it was just about waiting for the right moment and thats what i did, and if i could go back, id do it again! However, this is a completely new game so to me its a do over, i hope he doesnt have any baggage against me but i guess we'll just have to wait and see if we ever make it on the same tribe even, but i know he's just as good as me so i think we'll see each other again real soon.. this is my 3rd time playing, ive had a good cirie run but i do NOT want to be hvv'd cirie'd whatsoever. and thats kinda my fear coming back, I wanna be able to keep playing lowkey and having people underestimate me for as long as i possibly can, because guess what thats what works every time, these people are such fools they fall for it over and over again! they absolutely should beware of me because im here, and im in it, and i will absolutely lie cheat etc to just about anyone if it means getting me farther. ive got plenty of friends, im here for my virtual crown anywho. first book over with. i swear this was only so long because i was taking about myself too much, wont be as bad next time! well lemme not be delusional i do love talking about myself but xoxo thats it for now time to go back to having conversations and praying if we lose this challenge im not first boot

also getting to (hopefully) play with autumn again? the egyptian gods are good to me 

So I’m making my Day 1 confessional mainly so that I hit the 500-word requirement for the first challenge. Tumblr Survivor is different than when I last played 3 years ago. I hope I don’t come across as doing TOO MUCH but I’ve already started on the challenge and I’m trying to spend the first few days socializing and getting to know people. My goal is to have people come to me with alliances because it shows to me that they want to work with me. If I lay the foundation for the alliances, then I get the image that I’m running things. And I want other people to fill those shoes so that I can play an under the radar game. I feel like this is a group of people that I can stick with long term. I have a reputation for being a flipper, so I’m hoping that I can show to the Brains tribe that I plan to be loyal to these people long term in this game. But I also hope that I’m never put in a position where people want me to flip. Anyways, here’s my Day 1 analysis of my tribe: Trace – We played in Maluku together 6 years ago and I flipped on the fans the first tribal to vote him out. Granted, he got his revenge by making me the first boot of a versus side season, I hope he doesn’t try to seek vengeance now. So far I feel like we’re gonna be civil with one another. We talked about him and his boyfriend Matt, how he got a new dog just 3 days before quarantine, and how he recently moved to San Jose California. To me, it makes me think things are pretty civil between us. I could see Trace being a future leader of this tribe, so I hope that he goes about taking that role and makes the first move against people so I can work alongside him. Isaac – My history with Isaac is that I hosted Malaysia, and I feel like we’re on good terms. Which is nice because I don’t have to do the small talk with him and can just go right into the strategy. Sadly I don’t know him too well since he was voted out Day 6, but I felt bad that he was an early boot. The age difference between him and the other contestants played a role in it :/. But right now we’re hitting the ground running with things. We’re talking about my dog at the moment (which I intentionally changed my profile pic to her so that people would use it as conversation starters – we love strategic thinking!) Devon – I like Devon, but at the same time, I also see right through him. Devon’s trying to play a UTR game. I respect that, however, I’m trying to play a UTR game too. We had a brief call to solidify our allegiance to each other. He told me how he was loyal to Alyssa and Jess and they screwed him over big time during Guyana. So I’m seeing that he already has a plan to make sure that doesn’t happen. I want to keep him around because I could see the two of us being a dynamic duo going forward, similarly to Me/Matt in Maluku or Me/Andrew in Hosts. I need to make sure someone else calls the shots and brings me/devon in so we can plot against getting them out. Also, he’s really attractive and it saddens me that he’s straight so I now have to work on that. Autumn – a QUEEN!!! I love her! She’s iconic, she’s a legend, she’s never the same, she’s talented, she’s EVERYTHING! Considering that she’s one of 3 females on this cast, I hope that she and I can be the iconic male/female duo that I have every time I play. Similarly to Me/Maria in Maluku, Me/Lizard in Newfoundland, Me/Gerda in Ancient Greece, & Me/Jessy in Hosts. Right now we’re bonding over graduate school and the severity of the pandemic, so I hope that we can work together long term in the game because I love her. I also have to be careful with her because she’s won before. Duncan – I like Duncan so far too. We’ve played an org season together before I took my 3-year hiatus, but I don’t remember which one. And neither does he LOL. But so far we’ve just talked about psychology since we have a lot of respect for that field and how survivor is a huge social experiment. I’m hoping that he doesn’t see me as a major threat because of our intellectual talk. I like him so far, so hopefully, we can work together going forward. We’ve also talked about the types of dogs we both have and what we’ve been up to with our lives, which I like being able to get to know everyone. Bodhi – I messaged him saying “hi” and he ignored me, so I am comfortable with him being the first boot. However, I will need to have other people go and say they want him out so I can be like “cool let’s do it”. Maybe this will change tomorrow, we’ll see. But that’s where I’m at right now. Overall, I think I have a good fitting with the group. I don’t like that no one’s made an alliance chat yet, but I think my conversation with Devon confirms that I have allies going forward. Plus it's also Day 1, so no one wants to make that type of move yet. I’m hoping that by sticking with the social game for now that I can get people to like me and include me in alliances that they have. For now, I’m just gonna keep talking about my dog until that happens 😊

hey guys its me, again. I know i said I was done going on and on but now i have some tea! the tea is: IM PISSED. last time i played in challengers vs. champions i made it my prerogative to be the first one to find the hidden immunity idol, and so guess what for the last 4 1/2 hours ive been DECIPHERING and trying to figure out how to get it, first i spent 2 hours learning heiroglyphyics because my dumbass really thought it was hidden in plain sight right on our logo! until i realized it made no sense at all, but hey, good to know ill be able to find my way through an egyptian pyramid now if i ever need to! So i kept digging, a little deeper until i seen these little numbers on the blog under all the cast reveals, this was what told me i had just wasted my time with the heiroglyphs but that i was onto an actual lead now, so upon doing that, i was messaging both aj and amir discussing my theories with them because i figured if i didnt find it, i wouldnt mind them finding it....but i definitely just want it for myself first because cmon this is survivor and we havent even had any tribals yet, therefor sure ill let people THINK i trust them, but at the end of the day i only truly trust me, myself, and i. amir then helped me crack that the numbers on the blog actually spelled out the three gods names that our tribes are named after, so then about another hour goes by and i cant find NOTHING ive tried flipping the names, doing research into them, and got nowhere. until i realized, it was so simple, all i needed to do was look at MY tribes god, HATHOR, and then i took that name and coded it into numbers, which lead me to finding the idol trigger. Lemme tell yall how ecstatic I was to find it, it made all my work tonight completely worth it, or at least i thought until i tried entering the tomb and had to answer these questions to get in, and i got one wrong along the way..... I WAS SO CLOSEEEEEEEEEEE, THEN MY DUMBASS OVERTHOUGHT ONE OF THE EASIEST QUESTIONS AND BLEW IT. now i have to wait another 24 hours before trying again, which drives me crazy, i solved and cracked this puzzle within 4 hours, who's to say every other person on this tribe wont do the same? if someone finds it and gets it all right before i do, im gonna be so mad at myself but hey at least i tried, im gonna give myself kudos for figuring that shit out it was not easy!!! and i at least made what i would assume would be one of the first attempts at it, so anyone else who tries yall are copying me and trust you WILL hear from my lawyers!

i am not as upset to be back as i thought i would be! i don't hate the cast and theres only one person in the game that im not excited to see and ironically, its not jordan pines. I got stuck with a bunch of mayo boys at first but then you guys blessed me by bringing autumn into the tribe. THATS MY DAUGHTER AMERICA! i literally was the one to bring her into the community and never got to play with her, i think its crazy that after such a long hiatus from us both that the quarantine gifted me the chance to play with her. Hopefully i can last longer than 1 round to enjoy it lol. Also the boys aren't that bad! They're all really pleasant and enjoyable so far and i found out Trace used to live in STL so we're bonding on that! I'm hoping i can do well but ultimately I'm enjoying this tribe for what its worth but i just can't figure out what to do to go idol hunting haha.

To start, it’s important to acknowledge how good it feels to be back in TS. I wasn���t quite too sure what kind of cast to expect, considering most members from my original season, Guyana, would likely feel uneasy with me in the game. However, it looks like TJ is the only one from Guyana representing this season, which is great news for me. Even then, TJ and I got along great after the season ended, so he doesn’t worry me in the long run. My current tribe is clearly skilled in the social game, because everyone has been active beyond belief. Right now, I would describe my closest ally as Scott. He is a clear-cut threat, but has a lot more connections than I do and could be useful to me in the early stages of the game. We called for a bit last night, and continued to be around the bush about gameplay. However, if we ever lost a challenge, I feel like he’d run with whatever plan we come up with. In terms of my LEAST closest connection, I’d go with Bodhi. He’s a nice kid, but we just don’t relate and he can come across as arrogant at times. Scott has already mentioned him as a first boot, so I’ll likely stay clear of any game talk with Bodhi for the time being unless its pushed onto my lap. My biggest blessing/curse in this game will be the fact that I’ve played FAR less times than a majority of the players. Almost gives a ‘Russell Hantz’ vibe. Far less credibility entering a new season with experienced and well known players, but also means there is less material for them to know about when it comes to my game. As long as I don’t overplay my hand and let the game talk come to me, I could set myself up PERFECTLY on the Brains tribe. Autumn has been fairly quiet, but we talked a bit about television shows, which is great common ground to build on. It would be hard to classify her as a threat right now, but I wonder how much she has been talking to others. As for Isaac, he came in late to my DMs because of his work shift. We both work within food service, so it was nice to reflect on our work shifts and ask him about his interests. I think he’s capable of being someone worth working with, but no game talk has taken place between us. If we lose an upcoming challenge, I expect for that to change rather quickly. When it comes to Duncan, I’m not sure how to read him yet. He’s oddly active, and has likely been talking to everyone for an extensive period. I’d like to say I trust him, but I’m sure others feel a similar way. It will be difficult to pinpoint him as a threat to others, but we will see how things unfold based on the challenge trend. Finally, there was Trace. We held a steady conversation for a bit, but then he disappeared. Would likely make for an “inactive” boot if he doesn’t turn around his social game early, but things happen. Based on the number of times he has played already, it would be ideal to get rid of him within the first 3-5 rounds of the game.  

Here’s my cast assessment: Brains: Scott – This guy seems awesome. He seems smart, he seems well-spoken, he seems humble. I’m really excited to meet this guy down the line. Bodhi – All I know about him is he’s supposedly a crackhead and you should be careful around strategically… not sure how I’d fit in there. Trace – I like him! Funny, sassy, he and I totally need to meet! Devon – Fucking Slithers… Isaac – I’m hoping this isn’t the Isaac I fought with in a different game because this guy seems really funny and genuine. Duncan – What is he wearing? Autumn – She seems chill. I’d like to talk to her and get to know her some more. Beauties: Austin – He seems like a good southern boy, but I imagine there’s a diabolic side to him that the intro video doesn’t show. I’m gonna watch out for him. Adam – Another funny guy. He’s got a great personality and I could see making it far, but I also see him as someone that could get to self-involved and make a mistake down the line. Kendall – Ok, she’s cute and funny. Please let her be my new Lexi (and don’t let her be like Alyssa) Augusto – Seems like a good guy, but I’m not sure how our styles would mesh just based on his introduction Connor – Is this Zwooper Connor? Because like… hell yes!!! AJ – Not sure what to say here. Not much of an intro. But he seems interesting. Amir – I’m curious to see what this guy is like. I could see him being like someone I played with my first season which would be intriguing. Brawns: Dan – I’ve been hosted by Dan. I’ve played with Dan. I think he could be a great person to work with moving forward and I’m excited to reconnect with him. Liam M – He’s a funny guy from my interactions from him. He’s been quiet, but I’d imagine he’s not that quiet. TJ – Dumbass Liam L – I love Liam. We just finished another season together, so I could see us working well together Jakey – This guy is F-U-N-N-Y! I need him around. Jordan – Is this guy full of himself? Or like… how do you name a season after yourself? Ali – I like this guy. He’s going to be a social threat as a winner, so I’m gonna let him make himself a bigger threat.

okay so this is going to be my five hundred word confessional! My cast assessment is uploading so this is going to be a bit out of order but some updates. im now in an alliance with jordan and jake so life is GOOD. I love them both and they're both kinda chaotic and super fun which is super exciting! i also cracked the idol code with dennis yesterday in my host chat! my plan is to search again in three hours when i can, hopefully snag the idol and then tell my two lovelies so i can build trust. thats the goal anyway... in other news... trace from brain thinks he is SO slick. he edited his wiki to remove the fact that him and connor are friends like sir... the fact y'all hosted together is enough for people to be worried about you, you going all FBI level redacted is so stupid? it makes it look like MORE of a thing. anyway so if i can get my way one of connor or trace (or both im not picky) would go prejury... hehehehhe hmm wowie five hundred words is a lot more than i thought.... anyway so other thoughts lemme think... i think my game plan this season is something im going to stick to of gravitating towards the big personalities and threats. like i need cover as a winner with that said im very lucky that im probably the worst winner of the three? amir is literally one of the scariest ever and im terrified of him... and autumn i love her but she is more fun and strategic than me! like me landing on brawn is also great, because i'd rather be seen as brawny than strategic or social... god i really do not know how to fill up 500 words this is so tough not enough has happened yet hmmm... maybe i update my tribe thoughts... so Jake I LOVE, he is so much fun and i think we are gonna really really vibe... im excited hehehe. Jordan Pines is a legit legend, like he is gonna be SUCH a hoot i feel it... me jordan and jakey are literally gonna blow stuff up on this tribe and beyond im MANIFESTING it. others on my tribe... TJ is lovely! he talks so formally hehe its like our conversation is a script? like its human but its slightly rehearsed and weird its odd. British Liam I really like I really wanna stick with him but I am worried for him about being an easy vote? I wanna keep him safe tbh... then other Liam is ofc close to Jordan, which btw im SO glad jordan like addressed head on with me... im kinda fine with him sticking around now at this point... dan I love too! i think at this point my priorities are sticking with jake and jordan, while also protecting liam lovelis if he becomes a target because i really like him!! liam m first boot if jordan is fine with it, otherwise TJ...

I haven't done one of these yet and honestly, I am just gonna spill a little about my tribe? I like everyone a lot so far. I hope that we can win some challenges and stay safe for a while. I really like Ali, Jordan, and Jakey so far. But also, I know them from before this. Ali and I have never played together I don't think but we have always talked about wanting to. Jakey and I go waaaay back. He is actually from the same part of NY as me. We had a rocky relationship years ago but we have both come a really long way maturity wise. Then there is Mr. Jordan Pines. We always have good intentions and want to work with one another, but we always seem to start off on track, and then identify each other as threats and kill one another. He usually out places me so I want to keep an eye on him. As for the others, I'm really just trying to remain social, make those connections, but focus on the people that I know. I hate playing like that, but honestly, it might get me farther. As far as my strategy this game, I want to be super loyal to people. That's how I played my last game and it got me 2nd place. I know that I should be striving for first, but honestly second isn't too bad lmao. I think that what was missing from my last TS game was the glamour. The jury said they missed "big moves" and "idol plays". Well honey, let's do that then! I need to come up with a plan to incorporate those things into a strong social game. I just fear that I'll be damned if I do, and damned if I don't. My fear is that I will come up short with the moves and get second again, or I'll overplay and find myself gettin somewhere between 10th and 7th. I think a way I can get around this is not bringing all the people I trust into a big group. If i'm able to divide and conquer my allies, it will show loyalty, but also strategy. As far as the idols are concerned. Who the fuck knows. I can't get into this tomb, I can't figure anything out about it. I am searching high and low on the blog and pictures trying to find the key into the tomb. I have a feeling it is one of those things where you really need to put in some work to find it. Or it's one of those, it's under your nose the whole time and Jess, Alyssa, and Drew can't believe how stupid you all are. That is more likely the true answer to this haha. I have been asking Ali and Jordan about what they think, and they have basically "come up short" I don't know if that is really true or not, I know that they are really smart players. I think the key could also be in the posts as far as the hashtags. There are some really weird hashtags on some of the posts. Maybe it's a code or something? Lemme look into that.

Soooooo first day was super exciting bc my whole tribe is new ppl which I like bc it's always good to start in a fresh type game ya know. I'm on the beauty tribe werdily so I figure I'm the tai of the season . I also saw on one of the other tribes liam from my season is here so that could be a good or bad thing just have to cross that bridge if and when needed. First person I saw and talked to on my tribe is kendell and I really like her vibe . She seems super chill and I saw she played as a hero is a past season so could be a loyal player. Amiry I actually have seen before in a mini on discord. We didn't talk much but l dis vote him to win in the end so that could be good in my favor . Aj is really nice to seems to be a lil younger then but good to chat with so far. Adam is someone in the game that i have a few things in common with which is great bc connections is exactly what I need to make right now with a game full of new ppl .connor I'm not fully sure how i feel about him yet. He seems like he could be funny but he is always a lil short when we talk and I feel maybe he could be the person to go and i would be okay with it . Augusto is def the person I have probably been talking the most with so far . He seems like he could be my person in this game . I mean things change all the time but as of now that's how I'm feeling about him . I'm so nervous being back in tumblr survivor so soon after my first season in nighingale islands. I got 4th place and if anything I wanna do better now worse . Its alot to hold myself up to but i feel i can push my self more this game and do it . I'm hoping to try and play a lil different this time around . I wanna be bolder and try to do more with myself game wise . I want to play more strategic and not care even more to get my hands dirty. People in the past have called me cutthroat and a villain so why not be the best villain I can be . Finding a idol or advantage and getting a vote at ftc is the other goals I have for myself this season . I know its early but I have a great feeling about the beauty tribe and think we are gonna do great in this game together. Well that's about 500 for the challenge . Hopefully you'll get more confessionals from me in the game . Its gonna be a crazy season . May the tumblr survivor gods be with me in this crazy ass game . Peace out girl scouts . Have a great day . Goodbye all.  

FIRST IMPRESSIONS: BEAUTY TRIBE austin: hes boring but nice and that is okay, just be who u are adam: dangerous, mariah stans dont respect old people, animals or the dead. he scares me. hes real funny tho, kendall: she is so cute, she seems very hesitant to talk to me, but I want to work with her. Shes the only girl on our tribe so like shes not gonna be targetted by a bunch of twinks so its better to be with her than against her augusto: my fav so far, Relatable sweet idk i love him i hope he gives me a chance connor: white gay twink aj: i dont feel Cast Assessment : Winners Ali: my biggest threat in this game by far, kind, can be ruthless, underestimated, he’s gotta GO but I also have to work with him ?? Idk I want to work with him but I don’t think he will want to work with me so idk how I feel about that one yet. Autumn: she is extremely likable from this one intro vid alone...girl we in danger. Want to work with her for sure. 

I want to build a relationship with every member of my tribe, but I am afraid because that could make me a target when I’m already one. Today, I will talk to everyone but not about game at all, tmmrw I will select 1 or 2 people to really trust with game stuff. The goal is to be social but not the most social person on the tribe. I need to get at least 2 or 3 of these people to feel some kind of emotional attachment to me, so I’m gonna keep it strictly personal convos for tonight. I do usually get attached to people as well but this game, being back for the third time, I can’t hesitate to cut a single person. It’s clear some of the people on this tribe are wolves in sheep’s clothing, mainly Adam and Augusto who are lovable and sweet but careful with their words. They are level 3 thinkers (shoutout to jacob). Kendall, Aj, and Connor seem to be more like level 2 thinkers. Austin seems like a level 1 thinker so I have to work with him, those are the kind of allies I need. 

Adam gave the numbers the for this thing, but I told him to use a decoder to turn it into letters. I know I’m an asshole cuz he tried to help me and gave me the clues but I am not going to tell him how to find the tomb, simply because I want it, but I wouldn’t be shocked if he figured it out

Also Amir....

So on my tribe, Kendall has played with aj, Aj has played with Kendall and and Connor, and Connor has played with aj and augusto.Kendall and Aj were never on the same tribe, so that’s not a threat. Augusto and Connor both made it far together and didn’t vote each other out so that’s gotta be something to watch out for. Kendall seems super well connected in general, I think the move is to scoop up Austin and Adam and then take out on of the other 4 but if the 4 of Kendall/Aj/Connor/Augusto end up aligning, well, good luck Charlie! So basically my issue is that I don’t trust anyone. Like everyone on this tribe is either distant or a threat, and the thing is is I HAVE TO TRUST SOMEONE so like?? If I just keep my cards close and not talk game with anyone that’s just ensuring being on the outs, but I can’t choose weather to align with the social threats or the people who I barely know anything about because they don’t wanna talk to me much (Kendall Connor Austin aj) Meeee finks the move is to align with Augusto and Adam, they’re both obviously huge threats, but risks need to be taken so I’m going to work on establishing a game relationship with both of them, I trust Adam more than Augusto, and then we can maybe maybe pull in Austin ? Okay literally no one wants to talk to me i i i i, like no one on this tribe messaged me first except augusto, but hes very hesitant about any info in general. Kendall/austin/connor all do not seem to care to try and talk to me so only 2 things are possible, they have all aligned and are planning my downfall, or people r inactive for now but idk. IDK> i do not trust ANY OF THESE HOES ONE BIT, i have to find this fat ass idol tonight i must i must Im gonna get on a call with adam tonight and try and figure some shit out but homeboy literally told me that he took out jakey in an earlier season even tho it was bad for him jsut cuz it was cool to take out a high profile player like sis what in the actual FUCK AND HES THE ONLY ONE WHO SEEMS INTERESTED IN ALIGNING WITH ME LIKE EWKFNEWKFLEWFE i have no choice but to work with this basket case, GOD WE CANNOT LOSE IMMUNITY WE CANNOTTTTTT the people from the other tribes that I would like to work with the most would be jakey and duncan and bodhi. I really wanted to work with bodhi on cutthroat and I genuinely love duncan he is a sweet heart through and through. I wanna work with jakey because he is a massive threat and has bad blood with people who are in thi game. He can also be volatile and someone I can turn into a target ahead of me if it I required 

guess who just got an IDOL HEHEEHEHE. It's Pharaoh Thoth. It's Pharaoh Thoth. I must have said that literally six hundred times in my host chat, the fact that Thoth is a tribe name was legit staring me in the FACE i'm just stupid. and then i messed up on question 9 at 5AM yesterday so i had to stay up till 5am for a second day running which was soul crushing but.... i have an IDOL. I definitely did much more work this time, compared to last time where benj carried my lifeless corpse across the idol bridge only for me to get two separate idols. dennis definitely had to like defibrillate my brain cells into shape but im proud of the work i put in. having an idol is definitely super scary because the risk of going home with one in my pocket is super super high... but.... hopefully I can use this idol to cause havoc and shake some stuff up. it also covers me for a bad tribe swap which is a situation i really see happening this season for me... it just gives me some cover and some wiggle room! im really excited overall tho... ive already snatched myself up an idol and its only day two? ive got an alliance with my two favourites on the tribe, good connections fostering with all the others on my tribe and an idol... which by the way i'm calling dennis im so excited this season is gonna be hoot... also one more time for good measure ITS PHARAOH THOTH.

Alright! I'm so very excited to be back for Tumblr Survivor Brain vs Brawn vs Beauty! So far I'm really enjoying my tribe even though I was cast as a Brain??? What's up with that?? I'm just some hippie from the swamps of Tennessee who is decent at doing long division. So I guess I'll go through my tribe and talk about them individually: Autumn seems pretty cool, I know she is a gigantic social threat so she could maybe potentially be utilized as a shield but I like her! We've been talking a lot about food and the south but that is okay. Bodhi approached me Night One offering an alliance to which I was ecstatic to take him up on! Bodhi is a very very smart and cunning player, which makes me even happier to be working with him because I think as of right now he needs me to get off of this tribe. Duncan is a wildcard in my eyes. I haven't played with Duncan since Pacific Islands and we didn't get along if I recall correctly and I seem to be having trouble creating a dialogue with him? According to other sources that seems to be a consensus. Devon is really nice and I think that Scott thinks he's attractive but that's neither here nor there. I think this is the Devon who went by Slithers in Guyana and referred to Alyssa, Dani, and Jess as females at Final Tribal Council. He seems to be EXTREMELY straight (he said when he's not slinging 'rittos at Chipotle he's playing Call of Duty or watching sports) which is okay if straight people weren't my kiss of death in these games. Scott is a really fun one! He hosted me in Malaysia and always seemed to be a sweet guy and our talks together for the past few days have kinda proved that assumption? We've gotten to know each other pretty well and I think he's a cool dude. I really also didn't wanna be the one to tell him about Amanda Lynn but I was and he joined in on the jokes like a champion! I really think my relationship with Scott could be something that carries me at least to the first swap? Trace is an enigma to me. We have played Tumblr Survivor now 3 times together (he voted me out every time) and he hosted me in Manhattan Beach and I genuinely think in these first two days we have talked more than the rest of those combined? He is a masc for masc dreamboat though but he knows that. If I have to stroke his ego to get where I need to be I genuinely have no problem doing that. I have been trying my best to get in everyone's good graces and/or at least get a dialogue going with them and it seems to have been working? The suckiest part about this tribe at the moment is that there doesn't seem to be an obvious inactive or someone we can scapegoat but here's hoping we don't lose or we lose bad enough we can put it on someone who isn't me. 

i cant believe i learned a tik tok dance. i've never even downloaded tik tok before

this is a RANT confessional it's day 2 and im already so annoyed with this DUMB BITCH...and yes i am the dumb bitch in question WHAT ABOUT IT DAY 2 AND I GO TO THE TOMB AGAIN TRYING TO GET IN, AT THIS POINT IM POUNDING ON THOSE DOORS HARDER THAN ANY JEHOVAHS WITNESS YOUVE EVER SEEN LIKE LET ME IN PLEASE!!!!! and once again, i start off good on the questions, then BOOM i just flop out of no where. story of my life. like DAMN by the time i do get in there's going to be nothing left for me but a fucking stick. But its ok, last night you know what i got cocky and i honestly mightve blown it thinking i could find it myself, so i was forced to make a VERY risky move. im a FIRM believer in loose lips sink ships and thats always one of my biggest strategies when i play survivor is to use infomation and keep as much to myself as possible so i can play my game how EYE want and make MY moves as i see fit, however.....clearly that strategy has not WORKED for me seeing as ive lost twice, so im trying this new thing, its such a crazy concept it's called asking for fucking help ! this was really hard for me to do because of my whole tribe so far im gonna be honest i feel like i have a genuine bond building with AJ, Augusto, and Amir, but i dont want to go spilling the tea on the idol to everyone, the last thing i want is everyone else figuring out and trying to get it, granted, finding it probably wasnt that hard and im just a dumb bitch so someone else most likely ALREADY has it, however, if they dont.... i decided i wanted to make a move and tell AJ about it. Me and AJ have a past connection thats pretty good so basing it on that alone i decided to share my tea with him, and honestly i LOVE augusto and amir too, however.... these people are all silent killers, they wont be fooling me. even though i want to believe theyre on my side, im gonna need a vote before i start to put trust like that into them. So until them, im putting my eggs in AJ's basket and hoping he finds something and will trust me moving forward because of it, even if he already found it himself and didnt tell me, i at least made the effort to show him i want us to be in this together, so hopefully trusting and opening up a little bit more will finally improve my game but if not i am still hoping absolutely no one finds it so i can be greedy and try again, and probably flop again tomorrow. **BREAKING NEWS ALERT: aj has just informed me he DIDNT find it, which he could be lying but i dont think he is, but only another 24 hours will tell... 

I have not written a confessional in a day, why am I like this? Anyway, y’all are about to hear EVERYTHING! We all get onto the beach and the gag is that 3 winners join the game alongside us losers (;-;) but honestly, it isn’t too bad? Like genuinely, it’s cool that the winners get to return like yay for them! Not only that, but if people believe these winners to be a threat then that’s just a shield for me so I am not mad at that whatsoever! Looking at the cast this season… I see familiar faces and I’m not sure how to feel? I know Dan who is on the Brawn Tribe (Apis) and I adore Dan as a person. That being said, I had a lot to do with his boot in Seychelles and while we were working closely together, I had to get him out. My thing about games is that if it’s a new game, it’s a new slate. However, is he gonna feel the same way? Only time will tell. On the Brain Tribe (Thoth), I have played with Isaac, Trace, and Bodhi. My relationship with Isaac is inch resting because I think he’s amazing and he has actually hosted me before… but the only thing is that we voted for each other to go in Socotra so who knows how he feels about me in that way? Trace I know because of Socotra as well and we did click socially but we just never had much of a chance to play with one another so there isn’t much to say about that. Now Bodhi…. He is the person I am the closest to out of all these people and I do not know how that will affect this game? I was the only person to stick by his side during the first round of Socotra when he went home in a revote and in a way, this was good karma because I was the only Great Lakes representative still alive after Final 21. Now will he remember my loyalty and admiration for him if we are reunited in this game? Girl, I deadass have no idea and it could go anyway… which is scary like a yikes on bikes moment right there. The only person that I know on my tribe is Connor since we played in Socotra together. We weren’t TOO aligned but the round I left, him and I made an alliance with Samantha. However, this loyalty wasn’t tested much considering I got rocked out. However, a connection is a connection so pursuing that is something I am okay with. As far as my tribe goes, I really do like everyone! I am trying to be this super approachable person that people can laugh at and laugh with yknow? So I do hope it works in my favor in the long run because currently, everyone except AJ has expressed the fact that I am one of their favorite people to talk to on this tribe so yay for that!

Alright, so the first full day is over, we're nearing the end of the first challenge, and I think that I've positioned myself at least somewhat decently? I think I've learned from past seasons that the goal of this early stage is to make sure you're about right in the middle in terms of activity, socialness (which isn't a word, but everyone is going to know what I mean by it) and challenge performances. That way, nobody has reason to get rid of you before a tribe change(whether that's because people think you aren't going to be helpful in challenges moving forward or because you're too big of a threat and can't be allowed to make the next stage of the game) and will allow me to make some connections that will help me both now and later in the game. I think I'm implementing this well at the moment. I had a nice talk with both Dan and Jakey and I think both of them will look out for me early on, specifically for this first vote. Once that trust is established from voting, I think both of those will be very fruitful for me moving forward. Same with Ali and Liam L. Both of them have been talking to me a decent bit and I like the rapport that I'm creating with both of them, but these two are going to be HUGE threats this season, I can already tell. So I think it's best I get on their good sides and allow other people to catch on to the fact that these two are going to be people who need to go whenever you get the shot (specifically though when they stop benefiting me). This first challenge absolutely sucks! I always hate these stupid scavenger hunts and will be so glad when it's over. I think I've put in a decent amount of work that will show that I'm here and want to play, but we'll have to see after the challenge is revealed how my score is really going to stack up. I really don't want to go to tribal this first round, but I could see either Jordan or Liam M. being people who could be targeted for everyone else to not be the first boot if that's the case. I think Liam specifically hasn't spent as much time socializing and I think others hopefully know how large of a presence Jordan has (I've known him for two days and I figured this out). So like, it would make sense to take one of them out early, but I reiterate that I'm quite ok not going to tribal here and just being safe. Being back for my third time means that this truly needs to be the one where I can take home this win. I admittedly don't know if there will be a fourth shot for me. I think I'm nearing the end of my ORG playing as hard of a realization as that is for me, but I know that I'm not able to commit the same way I was when I was back in high school, so I need to make the most of this time out there. I made huge mistakes in my redemption season that still haunt me to this day, so hopefully I can fix those this time around, play a strong, strategically sound game, and maybe I can surprise myself this time around.

All right 500 word confessional coming up. Time to say my thoughts on this game so far and this is a good excuse to do it. Its been 65 seasons since i've done an all returnee season which is a crazy fact I won't shut up about even though drew hates it, and I’m feeling good so far on this brawn tribe. I already have an alliance with me Ali and Jakey, and strong bonds to Dan and Liam, that leaves Lovelis and TJ my new people I'm meeting and probably people i'd target if we lost just due to the fact I don’t really know them. Out of the two I’m probably having better early convos with TJ but I don’t think thats really indicative of anything as its just been 2 days and anything can still happen. Honestly this cast is kind of a mix and match of crazy throwbacks for me like y'all got me SCOTT, y'all got me KENDALL, like I am floored and I am so excited to play with some of these people. I think my strategy for the starting tribes is to try to chill a bit and not be the centre of attention if I can manage that. Ideally I just want some easy rounds where we mostly win immunity, but if I’m honest Im gonna want to go to at least one tribal before we swap, and i don’t want to go into a swap not knowing how people are actually planning on playing, I want a chance for everyones cards to be laid out early, and then I can better understand the playing field. Okay I'm running out of things to say and I still got like 200 words to go. Alright the tomb, FUCK THE TOMB, its crazy for me that theirs an idol system I just haven't auto figured out before anyone else, its very out of character. Especially that before this game started I found the legacy advantage and left the hosts shook, like they were actually speechless the game hadn't started yet and I already have a power that was a great moment. But the tomb has still alluded me. What I know is that their are numbers on the cast reveal posts and a weird in face in the picture but I cannot out two and two together to make this work. Im hoping everyone is struggling as much as I am because I don't want any powers on the table that I do not know about. I want ideally to know where everything is even if its not in my possesion. Knowledge is power and I want all the knowledge possible to give me the best upper hand. Im cautiously optimistic on this starting tribe that I don't think people will target me early, so I think all I got to do is just secure my relationships and make sure that when this game starts getting crazy, i got enough people feeding me info so I'm in control. WHEW 500 WORDS DONE!

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1CxQVVsZUxRnM6PtiAIKKX2ncbSa-2rOR/view?usp=sharing Look man I am exhausted if you want intensive strategy you have come to the wrong place

Truthfully, the biggest gag of this whole season is me being placed on the brain tribe. I obviously am brilliant, graduated from honors from a top university, etc. But like, my beauty is undeniable, no? God I hate that I wrote that but, I AM BACK! It feels good to be back on a season where like nobody seems that negative? Yet? It was really refreshing to see a couple of people that I already knew, but I honestly have a really good feeling about this brains tribe. I connected really well with everyone on the first day, and I feel like I already have a strong standing in the tribe just after a few hours. I also love that this tribe is only 7 people and not like 12 because I can actually connect with people on a closer level. That being said, another great thing about this cast is that I also have a good amount of friends on the other tribes. Connor is here. I love that for me, but I am going to have to be very strategic about how I use that friendship if our paths ever do cross because I am not going to let it get in the way of me being strategic and making moves that actually make sense for my game in the long run, not just to appease my friend. A similar thing could be said for Dan D, but he is also just like a scary good player and he’s engaged now too so I have to really work on that friendship. I am feeling somewhat good about this challenge. I have taken the time to really try and do as many of the things as I can, and all I can hope is that my tribemates do the same. I am a little nervous about some people’s scores… Autumn. We have less than 12 hours to go and she still hasn’t started. But I am hoping that some of the scores of the more active people will carry us to a win. It would be cute if I could avoid tribal for a bit, but I know I won’t be able to. Also, Isaac being here is funny. Immediately he came to me and was like, “god I hope you aren’t going to vote me out this time, AGAIN.” And I obviously would really love to work with the kid but clearly our history is a bit rocky. So my plan is just to be kind and kind of act like it didn’t happen in hopes that he too will do the same and we can actually work together as friends this time. In closing, I appreciate the opportunity to be brought back, and I really hope that I do not let any of my fans down! I am going to keep socializing, using my social skills to create lasting bonds that will hopefully save me for a couple of tribals. We will see what happens as the season progresses but for now, please wish me luck!

Okay! I am awake! I can make a functional confessional maybe! So first hour of the game I made an alliance with Austin because I have no impulse control and hey thought it would be swell. I then made an alliance 30 minutes later with Augusto and I probably would have made more alliances if Augusto didn't say "Kendall plz wait like a day," So I did wait a day... and then made 2 more alliances 24 hours later. In my defense it wasn't my turn with The Beauty Tribe's communal brain cell and it's been 7 decades since my last game. Anyway I think it worked out because now we have a power alliance and we are Bringing Sexy Back! ... Literally that is the name of our alliance. Bringing Sexy Back. I came up with it and it's like a double meaning because 1. We Sexy and 2. We back. We do not have backs though... there was a tragic accident. Anyway the Core 4 is Me, Augusto, Connor, and Amir. And we keep saying shit like final 4 final 4 but I have to determine the weakest link before it hits me in the face. I don't trust Connor which is why it's important we work together, because I have a feeling he's going to cause damage either way and it will be safer if he thinks I trust him. He has played with Augusto and has a high opinion of him, so that duo is something I am somewhat worried about. I don't know why I don't trust him, it's not a matter of dislike, if anything he's one of my favorite people to talk to on the tribe it's just there is something calculating about him. Like he's sizing us all up. Augusto and I get along pretty well. He keeps saying shit like "Queen" and "We are meant for each other" and other weird but nice things. We both live in Utah so that's pretty lit. I'd like to work with him but I'm also wary of flattery. He seems to be pretty social with the other two as well, like I mentioned before he and Connor were once on the same season together and Amir mentioned that he's the person he talks to the most. It makes me a bit suspicious as to where his loyalties lie which is sort of dumb because he's like legally allowed to talk to people but I don't want him to be their number ones. It would be inconvenient. Amir is... a mess. A likable mess but a mess. He literally told me he has been waiting for someone to ask for an alliance and that he talks the most to Augusto. He wears his thoughts on his sleeves. He seems a bit nervous to be back, like we'd perceive him as some sort of threat because he was an extra player so to speak.... I don't not yet anyway but it's probably for the best I don't say that out loud. We talked about having a spare fifth and I put Austin on the table because 1. it would be nice to have control of a spare. 2. To keep my promise to him to work together. Sadly I wasn't all that subtle about it so... probably sketched the others out even if it was only a little bit. There 400 words plus other more words. Suck it and See bitches! And by bitches I mean hosts and I guess who ever else reads this.

Ok so I have full confidence that I can reach 500 words because I talk too much as it is so here we go hahaha. My tribe is taking this challenge super seriously and while I obviously stan and enjoy having a very active and engaged tribe, I need them to have lower expectations cause your girl is on her period and she just wants to nap. This whole “everyone needs to get 100 points” energy is not a message I can actually endorse. I am content with a smooth 50 points so if I get more than that great but I don’t need the pressure. I respect everyone’s right to go hard but I would like to not do that. Like it’s a Monday my guy- if that’s how you want to spend it by all means but this is not the only org I’m in and it’s definitely not the only thing I have to do today. I desperately need to do laundry but like changing the sheets on my bed and going to two Zoom meetings has me BEAT. Like I’d call it a day to be honest IF it weren’t for my damn tribe and their push to 100 points per person. All I know if I reach that goal, y’all better not say a damn thing to me because I really tried. I not only look like garbage but I feel like garbage yet I’m out here taking videos and drawing on my face and looking up a damn TikTok dance even though the whole world knows it by now and I’m like why? Why am I doing all this? Is it really to keep white men happy? Does this arbitrary goal mean anything in the end? Do we really NEED 700 points and can we negotiate that number down a little bit? I’m just saying Like obviously I want us to win but no I don't want to spend all day doing this against my will. Y’all need to be happy with whatever I give you and VERY hot take: if I don’t get 100 points then what. What y’all gone do about it- fight me? I do not own Crocs, VHS tapes, anything Egyptian, anything Survivor related, anything rainbow, or a banana and I don’t feel bad about it. There, I said it. I own what I own and I ain’t breaking quarantine for anything so hear me when I say: y’all will get whatever I give you. I want to EAT today but no I gotta get to making all these random videos so I can rack up points, some of which would make for quality blackmail but we won’t get into that. I’m doing this honestly for all the iconic female players who aren’t playing. I can’t make them look bad by being first fucking boot in a season that only has two women playing out of 21 people so I will just suffer through the pain. It’s not like I don’t have the numbers to stay anyway so there’s that. This is all really a formality, if you will. I’m not going anywhere- low score, high score, it really doesn’t matter but that’s just between us girls.

Okay! I am awake! I can make a functional confessional maybe! So first hour of the game I made an alliance with Austin because I have no impulse control and hey thought it would be swell. I then made an alliance 30 minutes later with Augusto and I probably would have made more alliances if Augusto didn't say "Kendall plz wait like a day," So I did wait a day... and then made 2 more alliances 24 hours later. In my defense it wasn't my turn with The Beauty Tribe's communal brain cell and it's been 7 decades since my last game. Anyway I think it worked out because now we have a power alliance and we are Bringing Sexy Back! ... Literally that is the name of our alliance. Bringing Sexy Back. I came up with it and it's like a double meaning because 1. We Sexy and 2. We back. We do not have backs though... there was a tragic accident. Anyway the Core 4 is Me, Augusto, Connor, and Amir. And we keep saying shit like final 4 final 4 but I have to determine the weakest link before it hits me in the face. I don't trust Connor which is why it's important we work together, because I have a feeling he's going to cause damage either way and it will be safer if he thinks I trust him. He has played with Augusto and has a high opinion of him, so that duo is something I am somewhat worried about. I don't know why I don't trust him, it's not a matter of dislike, if anything he's one of my favorite people to talk to on the tribe it's just there is something calculating about him. Like he's sizing us all up. Augusto and I get along pretty well. He keeps saying shit like "Queen" and "We are meant for each other" and other weird but nice things. We both live in Utah so that's pretty lit. I'd like to work with him but I'm also wary of flattery. He seems to be pretty social with the other two as well, like I mentioned before he and Connor were once on the same season together and Amir mentioned that he's the person he talks to the most. It makes me a bit suspicious as to where his loyalties lie which is sort of dumb because he's like legally allowed to talk to people but I don't want him to be their number ones. It would be inconvenient. Amir is... a mess. A likable mess but a mess. He literally told me he has been waiting for someone to ask for an alliance and that he talks the most to Augusto. He wears his thoughts on his sleeves. He seems a bit nervous to be back, like we'd perceive him as some sort of threat because he was an extra player so to speak.... I don't not yet anyway but it's probably for the best I don't say that out loud. We talked about having a spare fifth and I put Austin on the table because 1. it would be nice to have control of a spare. 2. To keep my promise to him to work together. Sadly I wasn't all that subtle about it so... probably sketched the others out even if it was only a little bit. There 400 words plus other more words. Suck it and See bitches! And by bitches I mean hosts and I guess who ever else reads this.

wow, is it great to back! initially, i was pretty nervous entering this game because i honestly just didn't know what to expect. however, i feel as though i'm sort of picking up where i left off a few years ago in terms of adaptability. i was placed on the beauty tribe, and immediately there were a ton of familiar faces that i could connect with. those being adam, amir, and kendall. i would consider connor one too but we were never that acquainted when we played idlm together, i'm pretty sure i even voted him out. as with any game, it's all about breaking the ice in those starting days by striking up conversation with other people on your tribe and seeing what they're all about. with my aforementioned connections, i felt as though it was pretty easy slipping into conversation with them and just catching each other up on how life's been since we last met. with adam, that wasn't really the case since we still frequently see each other but nonetheless! augusto has left a HUGE impression on me in the best way possible. i adore literally every aspect of him and it feels like and i could be pretty good friends. austin is very sweet and we have similar interests, but i'd love to continue getting to know him to form a more solid relationship with him. overall, i feel as though the tribe dynamic works pretty well. everyone is likable and of course, while it's expected for the beauty tribe, it'll be tough in the event (knock on wood) we ever go to tribal! but i'm always geared up and ready to go girl so i guess i can take on anything. our first challenge is the scavenger hunt, and while i lowkey loathe it, this one was actually pretty fun! hopefully we win it because we seem to be pulling out all the stops for this. one of the tasks had required us ALL to be on call and honestly i feel as though that really brought us even more together as a tribe. it was an instant kii with everyone as we sat around sharing interesting experiences and memories. going into actual game discussion, adam is EAGER to play. like EAGER. he's so excited and his mind has been racing since i've touched base with him. as soon as we were introduced to the tomb, his cracked ass starting spiraling. he was NOT gonna stop until he figured out how to get into this tomb! initially, he thought the hieroglyphics on the logo were of importance but he then noticed that the tags on the cast reveal had interesting numbers that corresponding to our tribe name. we ultimately put these numbers into the blog and were let inside the tomb. HOWEVER, we have to fight to even see what's inside of it! we have to answer 10(?) questions i believe relative to egypt, and i got about 7 of them right and stumped on one, halting my progress until the 24 hours are up and i can go again. out of an act of selfishness, i do want this idol all for myself so hopefully adam doesn't get there before me, though i wouldn't mind it as right now i consider him my final two? but we have WAYS to go so who knows if that even holds up.

I guess i need to do one of these anyway!!! I wish i could do a video but i will suffer for the greater good as always!!! The cast this season is very interesting!!! I dont know a lot of people which is a plus but there’s a few haters in the game i hope aren’t coming after me as much as I’m coming after them LOL. Adam, Kendall, and Trace sorry boos your time is limited! I will never trust these players. On my tribe we have a masc straight energy with Liam, Lovelis, TJ, and Dan and some more feminine energy in myself, jordan, and ali. The fems have decided to join a group to stay together and hopefully we can get someone to vote with us if we have to go to tribal council. For right now I trust both of these players, but moreso Jordan. We’re not entirely sure if we can trust Ali. The temple stumped a lot of us and I haven’t heard much about anyone finding it. EXCEPT ME BITCH. I found that shit last night and I was so hype then jumped the gun on the third question and flopped. But I’m reallyyyyy hoping no one else has it, though I fully suspect someone else to have found it. I’m not going to tell a soul because I want it for myself and I’m worried word would get out that I found it and people would suspect I have an idol, even if I don’t. I don’t want to lose at allll. I’m putting my all into this challenge and praying we come out on top. If we get another clue, whatever, just don’t send me to the hell place. TJ is a cool dude and I enjoyed my conversation with him the first night. We vibe together even if he is a straight male and I am gay as a fedora. I like our pairing and I don’t find him to be a sneaky player so I’d love to develop our partnership further so we can be a powerful force in the game. I would feel good knowing I have someone outside my alliance watching my back as well. Right now, it’s hard to get a read of the tribe. Everyone’s kinda quiet, besides ali and jordan, and I don’t know if it’s because they’re already against me or just hard to warm up to. I guess time will tell but can that time be later? My plan right now is to just continue being myself because I think people like me on this tribe for the most part. I’m not going to over-socialize or play too hard cause the way this tribe is going, saying one wrong thing could make you stand out. I’m trying to hide in the shadows and play the cute role for as long as possible before I smile in their face and slit their throats :~) Also I may have planted some doubt into Jordan’s ear about Liam! Because Liam said to me he can’t do the tik tok dance bc of his foot disease that flares up sometimes. Note, this tik tok had no feet movement and could virtually be done in a chair. So I just let Jordan know what Liam told me and immediately Jordan was irritated. I didn’t intentionally mean to throw Liam under the bus, but the bus came quickly. 

So i meant it when i said that i truly like everyone in my tribe. I love the fact that trace is the first person I’ve ever played with that live(d) where i do. I’ve never met anyone from saint louis before and to be able to talk about the gay bars and the local colleges and areas is nice. I’ve seen his name way back when around the community. I think that it’s amazing, the casting this season so props to all you host. Bodhi is someone else who I’ve seen around plenty, but we’ve never had the pleasure to meet each other and he’s someone that I think is very intriguing. I know he’s a strong social player when it comes to brass tacks though so im a little nervous seeming him in the game. Isaac is someone who I’ve played with a handful times and it’s just weird? We have never targeted each other in the games we play but also have never actively worked together in a game. We usually just coexist and ended up on different sides because we had different friend circles in games past. Now if we go to tribal in this first round, then ideally one of those few people will go. Like I said I like everyone, but I need to make sure to play an active role this time, not so passive like last time. Autumn and I got an alliance together. Also, if I haven’t already praised the tumblr survivor gods that I get to play with m daughter, let me re-iterate that I am so ecstatic! Now I’m not going to put all my eggs in her basket, but I hope my connection with her can carry me through the first couple rounds of the game at least. We got an alliance together consisting of myself, herself, devon and scott. In my opinion, the key to a successful alliance is good communication and loyalty. I also want to work with people I have a genuine interest in. I think Scott is so adorable, and I can’t tell if it’s a façade or not but I’m getting along very well with him. Perhaps its just his strong social game kicking in. Regardless he’s someone that I like and is charismatic and optimistic, that’s the type of person I need on my side moving forward. He’ll be great for group morale and maybe he can snoop information out of others moving forward. As for Devon, he says he’s a very loyal player and he is from Guyana. I see him as someone that will hopefully be super loyal and perhaps even a bit naïve moving forward. I don’t know what I want my relationship with Autumn to be with like in this game. She could be my number one, but for anyone that knows us its possible we get targeted like natalie and Jeremy which I don’t want to happen. I really like our tribe and hope we can stay together as long as possible. What I want from this game is to play a strong game and still be liked by all my peers and of course try to win. My first time in the first quarter of seasons, I was brand new as fuck, fresh out the survivor pussy. I didn’t have any confidence or social skills and got booted first. My second season in the 2nd quarter, Lazio, was not a horrible game to play. The cast was trash though and not a well respected season. It was a weird twisted season, i didn’t like anybody on that season and went out in early jury, although I did make single digits. Last time I played was in the third quarter of ts seasons, playing in Bermuda. I played bc I wanted one last hurrah before taking a hiatus and I don’t mind playing in seasons hosted by Chris Stoner. It was revealed to be a 30 person and I wanted to quit after seeing that lol. I was a weak player on strong tribes during the first half of the game, and the few times I went to tribal I had enough relationships with people that I made it to the 15 person f*cking merge. Because I ghosted the first half of the game I wasn’t viewed as a threat but also wasn’t respected by players. I want to be respected for the game that I play this time whether it brings me to final tribal council or winds me up as the first boot. I came here to prove that I have the chops and can do it. I haven’t been voted out of a game in 2.5 years so if I do get eventually booted its going to sting hard lol. I hope to eventually see people like Dan and Ali get voted out before a swap hits but I bet ts gods will swap me onto a tribe with them both lol. Its just going to be awkward if I have to play with them. I’m willing to if I have to, but I def would prefer to just avoid the awkwardness if possible. In contrast I’m hoping people like Amir and Kendall perform well on their tribes because if possible, I already know I like them personally and would love to work with them later on in the game. I just thought about what I can rant on about for a 100 words. WHAT THE FUCK IS WITH THIS IDOL SEARCH!?!? IS IT LIKE ONLY OPEN FOR CERTAIN PARTS OF THE DAY? I LOOKED ALL AROUND THE BLOG AND CLICKING EVERY LINK I COULD FIND HOPING TO MAYBE RUN INTO THE IDOL HUNT. NO ONE HAS TOLD ME THE SECRET YET! IS IT ONLY OPEN ONCE A ROUND BETWEEN RESULTS AND TRIBAL? Oof I don’t want to lose. Losing to one tribe isn’t bad because its mutually exclusive, first and last. We don’t have to win 1st place, however we need to make sure we don’t come last. Getting first boot would suck eggs and I would end up getting a lower placement than my first time. Idk if anyone has gotten first boot twice, but I don’t want that distinction. 

okay so my tribe is picking it UP in the end of this challenge, my king jakey suddenly has a full sheet which we love to see. in other news... im not feeling TJ's energy, he is kinda fishing about Montenegro and referencing that I won in a kinda threatening way? and i think he thinks he is being super discrete?! but he... is not. its just making me uncomfortable, like i am already really insecure as a player about being a winner and being seen as one, and i dont like what he is doing. also wanna preface this with the fact that he asked about montenegro in a super complimentary way so this is 100% an overreaction JKASDF im not trying to hide that im a winner (im not trace trying to FBI redact the wiki) but i don't like it being brought up in that kinda threatening/fishing way. like when jake talked to me (even tho he was vague too) about me being a winner, he said he thinks me, Jordan and jakey are the high profile people on the tribe (even tho i think i only am because im a winner, im a one time player and not super connected), which at least grouped us together and was in a discussion about working with that? so yeah... i think at this point i wanna stick with Jake/Jordan first and foremost, then Lovelis, then Dan... then Liam M/TJ are bottom of the totem pole for me, but particularly TJ that man can go soon... (also this is really gonna be a mo situation where tj said literally one thing and i dont trust him KJLASDF)

Wooooo cast assessments except I never watch anyone's intro videos so it's more like a cast reaction lmao

https://youtu.be/K3rfK-Cf-GQ

everytime tj starts typing my heart rate elevates by about 600bpm. literally how can someone be so complimentary and yet so terrifying simultaneously i'm nauseous also just as a side note he is probably being super nice and im just being demonic but we will see kjasdfa

okay so if this doesn't demonstrate im insane, im not sure what will. i take it back about TJ, i think he is actually nice JLKSADFAD. i think his way of relating to me was talking about past games and honestly thats kinda sweet i think i just read into things too much. maybe i do like TJ and want him to stick around NNN. maybe she's born with it, maybe its genuine insanity. but yeah TJ if you are reading this sorry for being the rudest ever over a compliment nnnn

I’m so sad that we lost because I don’t want to see any of these people go home and I don’t want to be first boot! lol. I’m also pissed now because I spent so much time doing stuff for nothing >.> it’s the game though, so we’ll keep trudging along i suppose. I don’t want to go home so let’s see what happens 

[xpwewarchive]

XPWEW Friday Night Pyro (2-28-2020)

Friday Night Pyro February 28th, 2020 New Orleans, Louisiana UNO Lakefront Arena

Opening Segment: Golden Bryce enters the arena to a mixed reaction from the crowd. Half boo/Half cheer; Bryce then enters the middle of the ring and awaiting him is Pyro Interviewer James Westerbeck. James asks Bryce “Well Bryce it seems like the XPWEW audience is a bit split on you winning the world heavyweight championship last Sunday night at Flirting With Disaster over the All Man” <<crowd boos hard>> Bryce: “......James everyone in NOLA tonight paid hard earned money to buy a ticket and cheer or boo whoever they want, And the people of New Orleans have spoken and I think they are upset. Listen I’m upset too, but All Man had a chance and he fought his heart out though so let’s give him a round of applause y’all “NOLA! STAND UP!” <crowd somewhat claps for All Man> Bryce: All Man left it ALL in the ring and gave me one of the best matches of my career that I dedicated to a young man named Zayden who’s watching LIVE from Little Rock tonight. We’re pulling for you Zayden! But James, The reason I have you here is because I like your style and I like your voice I like your whole demeanor and presentation and I know you could do this justice. (Holds up title) This title is what I’ve been chasing for 9 months now and after winning it the other night I have the confidence to defend it and by defending it I thought i would put my own drip on it. So Nola you are the exclusive audience right now. This is the NEW XPWEW World Heavyweight Championship Bryce pulls black curtain off of podium The new title is revealed | Gold Strap, Oval big plate and 3 small oval side plates. 12 millennium star diamonds circle the oval making the title a net worth price of 120K Bryce: This marks a day in my career and to my supporters I thank you and I love you and I will always fight for you. To the people that boo me and boo my actions and my character when i know deep down I’m doing the right thing, I will pray for you, I will still care for your well being and I hope you find happiness. I am the champ and I am the man. Get it. Got it. Good <music hits> <Bryce exits ring triumphantly>

Plagueground enters

Kotto Brazil, Myron Reed, Siaka, Chrissy Rivera & Jordan Oliver enter and cut a promo on how Plagueground need to go back to there Neckbeard Nests before they think they are better than THE SET

M1: Myron Reed w/ The Set defeat Brodie Croyle w/ Joe Gacy

PROMO: 86 days until Lockdown 7

PROMO: PYRO on VICE promo with Action Bronson & Golden Bryce

In ring segment: Garrett Thompson with tag partner fellow Brit Ethan Bedlam; talks about how next week Friday Night Pyro will be in London England! His home country and he looks at the current standings is 4-3 in the ring and why is he being overlooked in the xpwew world title picture; Alveno La Flare comes down and says well I’m undefeated. I’m 2-0 why am I not in the conversation Ethan Bedlam speaks up “oh that’s bollocks! Well come on down and see who is bettah.”

Backstage: All Man holding an ice pack on the back of his neck, Tenille Dashwood says “You gave it your ALL the other night” All Man responds: “Did I? Sure. I guess. I knew that getting to the top was hard but I learned staying on top was harder, but I don’t care if it’s Golden Bryce, Champagne Clausen or God himself I. WILL. Be World Heavyweight Champion again....

M2: Garrett Thompson defeats Alveno La Flare [thus ending his undefeated streak]

Backstage: <Gorilla Position> Alveno comes back from the curtain and runs into Jacques Dudley who says man don’t pay attention to the stats and the standings go out there and give your best and if you keep doing that the win will come <enters Jordan Oliver “Jacques that’s loser talk you know that right, I mean to think man you were once unbeaten for 89 matches and now you are a shell of your former self I mean meanwhile I’m undefeated I can’t relate. Jacques well why don’t I challenge you ...for that title next week Jordan: ahhh oh you’re serious. Bro you don’t get title shots for losing records. <looks at Alveno> and that applies for you too Bum! Aha Jordan: How bout next week I’ll tag with my boy here Kotto Brazil and you two Bozos can tag and we’ll see who wins. Alveno: You got it bitch Oliver: Man fuck you huh bums <Jacques and Alveno look at each other in approval>

In ring segment: Kiera Hogan puts the women’s locker room on notice and says she’s not afraid of anyone in the Locker room; she then joins commentary

M3: Genevalisse defeat Audrey Carbine

Kiera: Genevalisse! Pa-lease what is that her first win ever lol <Lotus enters> Lotus in ring; At flirting with Disaster my dad challenged me to a shot at his title but I’d rather go after yours first Kiera: You need to stick to being the social justice warrior, ain’t no problematic stuff about me. I’m the first ever gay xpwew champion. I’m a role model. You are just a face painted freak Lotus: <Lotus grabs Kiera and attempts to put her in the helm sharpshooter> <<Slayer and Rosemary come down and hold Lotus down>> Rosemary: Why would you hurt a member of the larva, Mother doesn’t like to be disturrrrrrrbbbbed Slayer: <looks at Lotus> if you wanna fit in your gonna have to learn your place first <<Lotus in ring collecting herself>> <<<Kiera waves by ironically>>>

PROMO: Dragon Kid didn’t reveal his mask at Flirting With Disaster despite his loss to McGraw Interview: James Westerbeck with Dragon Kid and the importance of the mask. Dragon Kid has challenged McGraw to a flag match

[[However: Twitter would translate that Leonard has challenged Dragon Kid to a patriotic showdown at Blitzkrieg: Flag Match???? Japan vs USA in the UK?]]

1 on 1 M4: Leonard McGraw defeats GG

After the match: I don’t give a rat’s ass about England. As a matter of fact I think it’s one of the worst damn countries on this old dirtball. And I might not have much to say on Japan cause I’ll be honest I don’t respect them, I hate samurai culture, The food sucks, But I’ll say this nothing beats that Cajun Food that they got down here in New Orleans baby But first things first Dragon Kid with your STUPID mask and your STUPID name. Everything about you I can’t stand boy and I’m challenging you to a flag match. USA verse Japan in the UK you gotta grab the flag what kind of horse shit is that, well I’ll say this. I’ll accept the match but that doesn’t mean I won’t knock your teeth down your damn throat while doing it. <<<<Ryu remains wholesome during that intense sweaty promo from McGraw>>>>

Pre-Recorded Segment: Champagne Clausen backstage segment where he sends off Troy Clausen to a old timer’s home and has a bit of funny banter with the employee. Employee: Name: C: Troy Employee: Last Name? C: Are you serio..Troy. Troy Clausen. Xpw Employee: I have no idea I don’t watch football C: Hes pretty well know Employee: I have no idea C: Whatever it doesn’t matter Employee: Is he asleep C: He takes naps, Long long naps. But he’ll probably wake up soon and let him know that it is the year 2038. Tell him that his daughter was perished in a car accident on lol television and that he’s been in the care of Lenny from Mice and Men for the last 4 and a half months Employee: And do I tell him about you C: Yknow what. Tell him that his son is the xpwew world heavyweight champion and did it all without his help. <<<<walks away>>>>

Dragon Kid enters

Golden Bryce enters

Main Event 1 on 1 M5: Golden Bryce def. Dragon Kid

<During the match All Man and All Woman come down and join commentary; All Woman speaks a lot but All Man is watching the match very closely> After the match: General Manager Romeo Roselli comes down with Champagne Clausen almost hassling him at his side announces. Well as Champagne has informed me: He can now challenge for the world title since All Man is no longer the champion but gentlemen I’m going to tell you like this. On March 29th, 2020 From Manchester England. Golden Bryce will defend the xpwew world title in a 3 way dance against Champagne Clausen and The All Man in the 1st ever.....BLITZKRIEG Match !

[Match rules appear on screen and Kaitlyn Khaos and Nick Simmonds break the match down on commentary] It’s a 3 way dance but you must successfully perform their finisher 3 times on any opponent to win, first to do so is the world champion. It’s Bryce vs Champagne vs All Man ie: It will be the battle of the finishers: 6 Rings vs The Chardonnay vs The Allman Joy

[iwannainspire]

rambling 12/15/18

so lets start with the universe

i’m feeling more and more connected to the universe lately. i’ve always felt a connection to the universe, but its different now. like my relationship with ethan maybe. we used to fight, but realized we’re family and stuck together, now its all love and he’s so much cooler than i used to give him credit for. same goes for me and the universe

anyways, i feel like i can feel the vibe in the room. everyone can but some rooms have more tension. the outside is sometimes calm and other times its chaotic regardless of how many people are out there with me. i feel overwhelmed by the chaotic air when there are no people and i feel overwhelmed by the people in calm air. idk calm air is easier to walk in tho people or no people. i feel like my horoscope is always accurate and even if its not i check my friends and see theyre right. i like vice horoscopes because theyre vague ish. yknow? like it just tells you how the day will feel not what will happen. i like knowing how the planets change moods. i am connected to the planets and the tides. the universe moves and i move with it. my emotional state does. my psyche?

i feel overly connected. i feel the universe too strongly sometimes and it weighs me down or pulls me off my feet. i live in a snowglobe for days at a time caught up in the tides of emotions that don’t always belong to me. i invite them in and let them go in their time tho now which i used to not do. i used to ignore feelings i didnt like and sought out the happy ones. the search left me disappointed because happy wasnt as happy as i expected it to be. i put a lot of pressure on myself to feel happy when i knew sad was the one knocking at the door. ignored him or asked him to wear a happy mask. disrespected him and only made him feel worse. i’m sorry sadness. i accept you now. i invite sadness, anger, frustration, jealousy, anxiety, etc to come in and talk. where do you come from? what do you need? how can i help you before you carry on your way? i know we’ll meet again, but we won’t fight and hurt each other like we used to. let’s be friends.

i’m trying to accept all of my emotions. not just the happy ones. holding on to happy isnt good. trapping happy hostage when he comes to visit lol. locking him in the basement so he can’t see the sunlight and bloom. he gets sick and dies down there then you’re left alone again with just the painful memory of happy. it didnt have to be painful! let happy come and go as he pleases! i promise you he will come back if you let him go. don’t hold on to old happy times when you could be making new ones. live each day!

————-

zephyr-

the thing about zephyr is

idk. i forgive him. he isn’t evil or a bad guy. he is a product of his circumstances. he was born and raised to be this way. the environment and political climate he grew up in created him. it’s not his fault he is the way he is.

but he could be better.

i think zephyr is immature. i think his parents failed him. i think he failed himself. i think we all fail ourselves and other people. nothing to feel guilty or bad about tho. who has time for guilt for the past when the future is always a second away? accept what happened, where you are, who you are, and move forward. keep moving forward because you can’t go back. alright im getting weird and off topic now but anyway,

zephyr has a good heart. he has an innocent child’s heart. he’s young and immature. he was raised to believe he’s a grown man since 4. he makes his own independent choices. nobody can tell him what to do. he resents people telling him what to do. even if its good advice or something he knows he should do and was going to do but wont now because someone told him to. he’s an idiot. but it’s not his fault. he’s just immature.

he is sexist and shitty. it’s not his fault? but it is. he knows better than to be homophobic/transphobic/misogynistic/racist/EVERYTHING but he still does it because he has been told not to be. and that’s not okay with him. he doesnt like being told what to do more than he cares about how the other person feels when telling him what to do. its a virgo thing i think. not selfishness, but just stubbornness.

so zephyr could be better and he knows it, but he won’t be. he has to decide to do it for himself. i can’t make him decide to be a better person. i can’t make him understanding of others if he doesnt want to be. i cant teach him. i could, but why would i? i spent years climbing that hill and never reached the top. then it occurred to me that i had my own hill to climb. i need to take care of myself, not zephyr. he is not my responsibility and i am no one else’s but my own.

so i forgive him. im not mad about the time i spent climbing his hill to never reach the top. i wouldn’t have been able to see my mountain with its patchy trees and shrubs as beautiful if not for the barren desolation of his mountain. thank you zephyr for teaching me so many things about myself.

i am stronger than i thought i was. i’m always surprised by my growth because i can’t see it while i’m in it yknow. being with zephyr was experiencing growing pains and now that they’ve stopped i’m taller and stronger than i was before. thank you zephyr for making me feel alone. i found a friend in myself. thank you for making me feel smaller than i was. it makes it easier for me to see how much i’ve grown. thank you for hating the same things about me that i did. i know exactly what to work on loving and embracing about myself

i hope you can learn to love your true self too

————-

people have demons. i believe everyone has a good heart. this is leading off the zephyr paragraph bc he’s an example of a real human but it’s not about him.

i think all people are born innocent. theyre babies! completely and 100% being themselves. i think everyone has a good heart. nobody at their core wants to inflict misery on another. life is what you make of it and you are what life makes of you! it’s the universe!! we’re all connected to it and thus connected to each other so nobody at their heart of hearts wants to do anything to hurt the universe we are all a part of. but things happen! not everyone feels as strong a psychic connection to the universe. we have demons too. we have anxieties and jealousies and angers. they look like the wendigo to me. or centipedes. semi-translucent grey shapes lingering in the shadows. big ones stomp around making the floor shake. they rocks at you from a distance. they follow you when youre walking home alone at night. they whisper in your ear. they slither through your blood stream making your heart beat too fast then too slow and your hands cant stop shaking. they twist in your stomach and bubble up your throat. they wait until you aren’t looking to move.

do you do what they say? if you do that then maybe they’ll stop terrorizing you! they’ll leave you alone and you’ll spend the rest of your day worry-free. right?

wrong! everyone has demons! they don’t stop! but guess what? theyre not as strong as you think they are. don’t give in to them! they’ll invite their friends and by then you’ll have a real problem. demons breed demons. don’t feed the demons.

so what do you do? you can’t stop them and you can’t give in to them. should you fight? you could try that. you could try ignoring them too. i’m not really sure yet honestly. i know you shouldn’t feed them though. i’ve found ignoring them to be the easiest option, but it doesn’t kill them. so maybe it is a good idea to fight? fighting makes me tired, but the demons aren’t as strong as you think. tackling one or two a day shouldn’t be too hard and then i could take off weekends.

but wait, let me tell you that fighting the demons isnt a risk-free option. be prepared to lose to them every once in a while. but if they get you down, dont stay there. get right the fuck back up. finish the fight if you can or go home and take a nap to regain strength but dont just sit there in the dirt feeling defeated. never do that because you’re a fighter. life isn’t fair. everyone has demons and we’re all fighting our own battles.

so don’t judge people so harshly because you don’t know their battle. maybe their demon of the day is a level 2 maybe its a level 20. we all have good hearts and we all have demons. some of us have fallen for the demons and their tricks and that’s why we do bad things. the demons want to disrupt the universes cycle. i’m fighting them because i want to protect myself and everyone else. we’re all one

[wiinterrose]

          ( xavier serrano , cis male , he / him, 23 ) no way ! i swear i saw 𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐄𝐋 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐒 walking down danforth avenue ! i just saw a post about them on 6secrets ! i think it said something like “𝐌𝐈𝐊𝐄𝐘 𝐅𝐋𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐒 𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐎𝐑'𝐒 𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐄 𝐀𝐓 𝟓 𝐀𝐌 : 𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐎𝐑 𝐘𝐄𝐓 𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆 ?”. isn’t that wild ? i guess that makes sense since they’re apparently 𝐃𝐔𝐏𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐈𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐒 and 𝐂𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆. fans will claim that they’re 𝐎𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐂 and 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐂.  i mean , it’s not like i know them personally — they’re a famous 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋 𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐑 / 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐔𝐁𝐄𝐑. whenever i think of them, i think of 𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐂𝐋𝐄𝐒 𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐓-𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐒, 𝐔𝐍𝐑𝐔𝐋𝐘 𝐂𝐇𝐎𝐂𝐎𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐂𝐔𝐑𝐋𝐒 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐒, & 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐋𝐈𝐓 𝐒𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐒 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐌 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒. i wish i would have asked for an autograph ! ( oliver, they / them, 22, est ).

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐘

— mikey was born and raised in winnipeg because i think it’s funny when characters are from winnipeg. if you’re from winnipeg i’m so sorry. definitely was born on the coldest day of that year ( so like some point in january )

— but because of those long, cold harsh winters, mikey found himself in a dance studio a lot. his aunt was a dance teacher and with rather absent parents who meant well but both had long hours at the local hospital, he spent a lot of time with her. he fell in love with dance pretty early on, always having a certain fluidity and grace even when he was young.

— random but he also played hockey up until he was like 16 or whatever because he’s canadian and i’m not stupid. it happened. he can still skate tho. in a slightly different life he probably would have been a pretty good figure skater huh 🤔🤔🤔 but anyway...

— also feel like it makes sense that he did gymnastics. and trained in classical ballet.

— he went to university of toronto for college, studying kinesology and dance, and danced at one of the prestigious studios in the city.

— his big break moment was when in his sophomore year at ut, he made it onto the second season of world of dance in early 2017 ( lets pretend that show has been on longer than it has bc i don’t want it to be the first season of it sldk ). he made it all the way to the finals and quickly become a fan favorite along the way. though he ultimately placed second and missed out on the million dollars, that was the beginning of many doors opening for him. ( for those who, might have the vaguest clue what i’m talking about : i’m highkey feeling like, michael dameski style which is an idea i had after i named him michael so don’t @ me for him having the same first name ).

— millions watched that show, including some prominent agents and scouts who were able to help him launch a professional dance career : something he never thought he’d see himself actually doing. his first big gig was making the dance team for some singer’s north american tour, and he ended up not returning to ut to pursue a professional dance career full time. since then he’s danced in a few music videos for some uber famous musican ( same one he went on tour with or not idk ?? also a wc ?? maybe ?? ), a tv show, couple movies, and other various gigs around the city. he works part time at a studio when he has time, and has been honing his choreography skills as well.

— he makes enough dancing, but certainly not enough to make him RICH. no, that come from an impromptu vlog he did while on tour with aforementioned singer. having already garnered a following from world of dance, he soon rose to youtube fame as well, something he never could have predicted. i feel like his videos are very just, day in a life with various random athletic challenges mixed in, and various workout and flexibility tips. he also still does pieces and duets with other prominent dancers just for fun too. his natural charisma and attitude really just carries him through easily lmao.

— mikey developed a bit of a habit of sleeping around when he left for college, all the newfound freedom was just intoxicating and well. he was hot so. it wasn’t like it was hard alsdkjf. that stuck around well into his blossoming dance career. nothing that was enough to be scandalous, but he made his way around. and then a year and a half into this unforeseen new life, he met matthew glass.

— he’d had a couple serious relationships before, one in high school, one his freshman year of college but neither of them could hold a flame to what he felt when he was with matt. perfection wasn’t something mikey believed in, but he almost did with what they had.

— it was like for over a year and a half he lived in this insane dream, and then mikey and matt broke up and he was devastated ( behind closed doors and with curtains pulled tightly shut ).

— he then proceeded to broadcast how perfectly fine he was doing by going back to his old ways and sleeping around obsessively, this time with very little regard as to how many headlines he was making. as far as coping mechanisms go, i guess sex is better than alcohol ?? not to say he wasn’t also drunk at times l o l.

𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐂

— mikey gets around. has definitely been trying to forget matty with other warm bodies but honestly it’s not working

— very bi. very much does not care. if the world didn’t know he was before, it definitely does now lmao. he hasn’t come out in the sense he’s like posted a video about it and said “i’m bisexual” but it’s pretty obvious from the media and maybe he has gotten asked in interviews and has just shrugged and been like does it matter ?? i’m sorry he’s not the vocal bi ally we need. perhaps we will work on that.

— hasn’t dated anyone since matt bc he’s highkey lowkey still hung up on him but no one needs to know that right. outwardly, he’s very much the same : seemingly happy, but he’s a lot more careful with his heart and letting people close to him. if anything he’s become a bit of a two-way mirror, always seeing out but never really letting people see in, just what they want to see.

— probably goes without saying but extremely flexible. idk if any of you know who juuse saros is but apparently he can twerk in a split and i’m not saying mikey can but like. he just might be able to...

— straight up does not get cold. never wears more than a hoodie, probably danced shirtless in the middle of winter just fine. at least being from winnipeg is good for one ( 1 ) thing.

— i feel like people call him flower. idk guys. maybe im just thinking too much abt hockey goalies.

— always posting on instagram stories. u kno the type.

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘

— he tends to be extremely underestimated as he comes across a bit dumb and generally has a pretty positive outlook on life which people confuse for him being naive when that isn’t the case. but he’s found he can use that it his advantage and that sometimes, people will tell him things they think he can’t understand but he hears and remembers everything. it’s helped him out of a few difficult situations before.

— i feel like he has a bit of ethan dolan’s personality & dumbass energy idk guys...

— live in the moment kind of dude. his motto is probably like : you just gotta know what you want to do next. i mean looking back on his life it’s been pretty crazy and that’s only solidified his outlook that like, you really can’t control too much. just let it go where it takes you.

— people do like him though and they like talking to him for whatever reason. generally has pretty trustworthy vibes but he’s more slippery than he comes across. he’s a selfish person at heart and always has his own best interests in mind, even if it doesn’t seem that way at first.

— extroverted. i think ??

𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄

— 6′1″. chocolate brown eyes. curly brown hair. he has a lithe but extremely fit build due to his career. his core strength is especially impressive.

— he has a monochromatic lineart tattoo of a rose on his left forearm / wrist and a butterfly ( again monochromatic & just lineart ) on his right shoulder. small scar at the base of his neck by his ear from an unfortunate hockey accident.

— needs glasses but usually only wears contacts unless he’s in his apartment late at night.

— he’s not overly fashionable, going more for comfort than how he generally looks. on a regular day, he’s probably got the whole... college athlete look going if you know what i mean. a big fan of mirrored aviator sunglasses. wouldn’t know what dressing up meant even if it slapped him in the face.

— PINTEREST BOARD

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

first and foremost i want to say that i like to vibe and brainstorm with people to come up with unique connections between our characters but here are a few ideas :

— ( f ) a close friend he has had on his channel a few times and fans passionately ship them but they’re really just good friends. maybe they play into the drama a few times as well tho. — the singer whose tour he danced on — singer whose music videos he’s been in — mayhaps even actors for that tv show / movie he was in ( v small role but whatevs. maybe they just Vibed yknow ) — flirtationship 😔 — always ye ol good hookup l o l — we keep running into each other idk maybe we should talk ??

TAKEN CONNECTIONS PAGE HERE

𝐎𝐎𝐂

         hey guys, i’m ollie. my intros are either written really eloquently or a big mess bc im trying to rub together a couple braincells at 1 am and whatever comes out, comes out. no need to guess which category this one falls into lmAO. anyway, i’m a slow plotter bc i’m easily overwhelmed trying to do too many things at once but i swear i will try to get to as many people as i can. and yeah this entire character is inspired by my love of world of dance don’t @ me... if u made it all the way down here u should watch this bc 😳 & mikey has the same athleticism and strength.

[ao3-writer]

The Q Word (1/2)

Could you maybe... crankiplker angst with a happy ending? Like Mark Messed Up Big Time And He Has To Fix This kind of ansgt.

 Mark decided to host a party at the office, inciting friends and Youtubers alike. The celebration had no real reason to it, it was just a little thing Mark wanted to throw together for everybody in L.A.

 Ethan and Tyler were busy getting the last essentials to the party fixed up before they finally had time to socialize. Amy was taking Chica out to use the restroom so that she wouldn’t have to charge up and down the stairs to get their attention.

 Mark was chatting up with Matt and Ryan when Ethan stood next to him, sliding his arm around him. Mark shook Ethan’s arm off. The younger man simply took nothing of it, just walking away and finding Tyler.

  “Hey, did you find Mark?” Tyler asked, drinking the ‘safe punch’ from his red solo cup. Ethan nodded.

  “Yeah, but... he was just busy. I’ll just talk to him later.”

 But later turned into an hour. and from an hour to two. and from two to three. Soon enough, people began to leave. Mark was talking to practically every person that had showed up except Ethan. Hell, he even managed to hang around enough for Tyler to tell him that Ethan was looking for him. But Mark and Ethan never spoke.

 The night dwindled down, the room got too hot for Ethan and he made his way outside, letting the cold fresh-air blast the heat away and fill him with relief. The stars barely shined, the moon exceptionally bright, fighting against the glow of the cities own lights.

Ethan heard a door open behind him, hoping it was Mark. Unfortunately, it was just Amy. She had her hands stuffed in her coat pockets and revealed a napkin hiding cookies.

  “Here, I figured you needed these,” she said, shrugging as Ethan’s face lighted up. “What happened to you and Mark? Weren’t you two going to be inseperable this entire night?”

 Ethan chuckled. “Yeah but... he’s just been socializing with a lot of people. I’m fine just skirting around and joining occasional conversations and debates,” Ethan replied. Amy raised an eyebrow.

  “What do you mean? Has he not brought you into any of his conversations?”

  “Not really. He’s kinda just been...” avoiding me “... busy,is all it is.”

 Amy wasn’t buying it. She welcomed Ethan to follow her back inside. The hot air escaped, Ethan kind of missed the cool air outside but this would have to suffice. Amy led him through the small stacks of conversations before they finally reached Mark.

  “So anyways, as I was saying-- oh Hey, Ethan,” Mark greeted, wrapping an arm around his boyfriend. Amy was relived, seeing nothing had gone wrong. “This is Ethan. You’ve probably seen him in my videos. He edits too,” Mark added, “he’s a big ball of fun. I love him.”

  “Don’t you have a Youtube channel too?” A girl Ethan had never met before asked. Mark simply laughed. “I’m surprised you’ve heard about it. His channels pretty nonexistent at this point, isn’t that right, Eth?” Mark asked. Ethan felt the insult harder than expected, staring at Mark in confusion.

  “How long have you two been... together?” A different stranger asked. Mark shrugged.

  “Probably two or three months. But it’s all just numbers, am I right? Who needs to count days when you’re in a relationship? All you have to remember is the anniversary and you’re good,” Mark replied, pulling laughter out of the others. Ethan was put further into shock. They’d been dating for six months already, how could he have forgotten?

  “Mark,” Amy said, trying to hide her forcefulness, “wanna tell them about the project Tyler and Ethan have been working on?” Amy tried her best smile, hoping that Mark could recover all the shit he’s said about Ethan already. But to no avail.

  “For what? It’s not like they’re the brains behind it. They just do what I ask. Nothing more. Besides, Ethan can’t think further than in his own box sometimes.” Amy and Ethan stared at Mark in shock while the others merely chuckled and mumbled among themselves. 

  “Moving the camera’s hard work, Mark,” Ethan finally said. Mark scrunched his face in annoyance.

  “Yeah but we have to retake half the things you film anyway. You suck at it, Ethan. Stick to vlogging.”

 Those three words were all it took for Ethan to snap. He let go of Mark’s arm and stared at him angrily. Amy already knew what was coming and stood by Ethan’s side quickly, but part of her wanted to see Mark be dropped a peg.

  “Well maybe if you weren’t such an asshole, things wouldn’t be so hard. After all, you’re a fucking prick most of the time. Why don’t you stick to ‘vlogging’, Mark. After all, your most popular videos are mostly you doing dumb skits that WE have come up with,” Ethan bit out. Amy rolled her eyes and tugged at Ethan’s arms to lead them away from the group and back outside into the fresh air.

 Mark was stunned, watching where Ethan just was back to the others. He gave a small smile before he tried making his way through the people before Tyler stood in his way and steered him off into a different conversation.

 The party was over. The people had left, Tyler and Amy were left to clean the mess while Mark texted Ethan desperately as to where he was. Mark grabbed a plastic bag anyway, starting to toss empty cups and nacho plates inside. His phone buzzed and found that it was someone thanking him for the wonderful night.

  “He’s not answering you anytime soon, yknow,” Amy said. Mark stared at her and she merely shrugged. “Just sayin’. You messed up big time, Mark. and I mean... big time.”

 Ethan finally replied, saying he was at home. Mark immediately called, dropping the bag and stepping outside to hear him.

  “Where have you been? Ethan cmon, you can’t be that mad. I was just trying to be funny,” Mark said.

  “Yeah well it was a dick move,” Ethan replied, “you know I’ve put up with so much bullshit you give me and it honestly doesn’t feel like a relationship anymore. It feels like a fucking dictatorship. I’m not your whore. I’m not some servant. I’m your boyfriend, Mark,” Ethan said over the phone.

  “Ethan, don’t be dramatic. I was just trying to be funny. Okay, one of those jokes did cross the line. But cmon, we always take like this,” Mark pleaded. Ethan scoffed.

  “WE?! You always talk like this, Mark. Like the egotistical little shit that you are. Saying that m channel is nonexistent and saying I suck?! I try harder than you probably do, Mark. DO you think I fuck up on purpose?! I learn from my mistakes, but you just completely ignore your own. Blaming it on somebody and anybody else. Fuck you, Mark.”

  “Hey, don’t be like that. I never said you were a fuck up. You know how much I support you in all that you do! Cmon, Eth, it was one time. We need to move past--”

  “Oh no. Oh-hoho, NO. You are always like this. You are always an asshole to me and sometimes I don’t even realize. You avoided me all night and I... I had nobody to talk to. I was lonely. Jesus Christ, sometimes I feel like you’re embarrassed to be around me!”

  “You would too if your boyfriend was a total queer.”

 That was it. That was the last straw and Ethan went off. Amy stepped out to find out what was going on and she could even hear Ethan’s rage over the phone speaker.

  “A QUEER?! ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS, MARK?! I done. I’m SO fucking done with you. This is it. I’m done with it all. I’m done with your constant abuse and your stupid jokes. I’m done working for you. I’m done getting every little detail perfect because your subscribers will ‘notice something’s off’. And you know what I have to say about that? FUCK YOU. Fuck you, Mark. Fuck you and everything you stand for. Fuck your channel. And fuck this. We’re done.”

 Ethan hung up the phone. Mark took each blow and let it sink in. Damn he really fucked up... big time.

 Amy walked over, her boots clacking against the pavement as she reached Mark, who’s head hung solemnly to the ground in shame and regret.

  “Wow... The Q word’s out. You have a knack of pissing people off sometimes, y’know that?” Amy said, rolling her eyes. Mark began to speak but she raised her hand, as if ready to strike at him. “I wasn’t finished, you piece of shit. Now, I know that you’re not the best when it comes to relationships, aha, i.e. me.”

  “Amy I--”

  “BUT,” she raised her arm again, “ that doesn’t erase the fact that deep down you’re as much as an asshole as the rest of us. You need to fix things with Ethan. If you don’t, you’re going to ruin things for yourself. Don’t bear Kathryn with all the editing. Don’t make like harder just because you’re too proud to fix your mistakes. Now you drive your ass all the way over to Ethan’s house... and you fix it. Before I fix you a new face, got it?”

 Mark nodded his head, knowing he couldn’t argue with her. He headed back inside for his keys and returned to find her still standing there.

  “Thanks... I guess,” he whispered. She grabbed his arm before he went and she looked him right in the eyes.

  “And don’t fuck it up, Fischbach.” She let him go and she went back inside.

[I NEED THE ENERGY TO WRITE  A HAPPY ENDING. PT 2 COMING SOON]