#and dont trust myself writing the ship cause i dont think i am familiar enough with their dynamic rn lol so i would need to research:tm:

[alpinelogy]

Debating the reasonableness of naming a fic after a niche Italian meme that i cannot even explain properly cause i dont speak Italian

[far-east-orient]

Gin’s Journal Part 5

The port of Kugane is the same as i left it five years ago, the salty wind whipping on my face and the sound of the native people welcome us as we step on the dock. Even after years leaving the city, i still feel awed at the majestic Senmon. The gate of the Hingan that lead us to the Holstery. We spent a bit of time discussing which inn we should stay. I initially offered the Uragshi to stay at the boarding house belonging to the Ittotshu Hanabi Dojo. 

I know for a fact that sensei will gladly have us use the place as all the students have left home for summer vacation to their hometown. The rest that left will not mind having companies.Khatun Qurcaqi decides to stay in Bokairo inn, an excellent choice too as the inn provide a fair price and high-quality service. I remember once writing an article about Hingan tourism in the local newspaper and gave the inn a  good review after they invited me to stay for 2 days and 1 night.

As the person who has stayed in Kugane for sometimes, i am familiar with the laws and custom of the port town. I explained the rules and is glad that the Khatun and other Uragshi sisters understood this.Everyone was glad to have left the ship and as soon as we settled in the inn, the Uragshi went to the hot springs to relax while i went to the dojo with Sara and Nergui. Sensei was happy to see me, it was a happy reunion. He is older than i remember and has stopped teaching for a year now. Focusing on his inner cultivation and only overseeing the Dojo. Hiroki, my fellow Meijin have taken over as the Sensei of the Dojo temporarily until he receives approval to take over completely. We exchanged news and pleasantries. That night, i sleep in my old room with Sara and Nergui.

Speaking about Sara and Nergui, the kids have been very obedient to the Uragshi and i have volunteered to take care of them. Nergui reminds me of my younger self. He is quiet and reserved but takes his responsibility for his sister seriously. The Uragshi, unfortunately, do not have enough capacity to raise children at the moment, i do not blame them as the clan is still too new for younger charge and it would be a considerable burden. Even though my heart is heavy knowing this, the most logical way we should take is request the Bairon to take the kids with them if we cannot find the Arulaq. Once Nergui is older, if he chooses to return to the Uragshi then he can do so.

I spent the next day reporting to Sekiseigumi as a custom, as an ex-volunteer i have few colleagues in the security force. Chief Kondo Hiraizumi gave me my old badge, the man trust to me is something that sometimes weight my heart. I resolved not to misuse his trust and keep the badge in case it comes handy.

I might have gone all around the city for most morning and afternoon, however, my mind constantly moves back to a woman staying in Bokairo Inn. Ever since talking to Dayuuqi above the ship, i found myself unable to deny it anymore….i am surely getting attracted to her. I am trying hard to not make it too obvious so she won't feel uncomfortable.Passing through the Kogane Dori, the owner of the shop pulled me to peruse her wares. Initially, i was going to return to Kogane Dori to meet the Uragshi however the wares caught my eyes. Various items that the owner claim to be popular with the young ladies. Looking at the various colorful hairpins, the owner keeps promoting her wares stating that this is the current trend in Bukyo, the capital and amongst the lady of higher class. I start to try and picture how it will fit Yuu, bringing the item in front of my face and trying to picture her wearing it when a voice greeted me.

I almost dropped the hairpins in surprise. Seeing her standing there wearing a very beautiful Suikan.I wonder if she knows Suikan with Silk Yarn Kikutoji she wears means she is ready to be married...the mere thought brings me to fluster about it but i recovered quickly. Using souvenir as an excuse, i bought her the hairpin which she wears on her hair fitting her Suikan and her beautiful smile. We conversed for sometimes after that, before the rest of the Uragshi came to join us. I offered to take them to the Ijin section since Sara wants to see the Garlean consulate. When we arrived, the Garlean as always is haughty and arrogant. Sara keeps trying to imply that she wants to get in, even jokingly said she may be able to break in. I feel this is quite disturbing since it may pose two kind of danger. First is that the ground inside the Garlean consulate belongs to them. If she got caught, she can be treated and punished according to Garlean law. Second, if the Sekiseigumi found out one of the Uragshi tries to break in, they won't be pleased. The Garlean guards feel annoyed at Sara and was about to see what she was doing when i start talking to them, i shown my Sekiseigumi badge and told them that the Xaela are guests of the Bakufu. This does not seems to deter the Garlean as they shout at Sara to move away. Sara proceed to spoke with the Garleans and they seems to be caught aback. I wasn't really sure what she said to them.

When i returned to the group, a tall male already joined the group and was talking with Yuuqi. We introduced ourselves to each other, his name is Tagadhur and he is an acquaintance of the clan. He seems to be curious at me. As we walk towards the park, i observed Tagadhur keeps attempting to talk to Yuuqi. I know that Yuuqi is a beautiful woman and that she have many admirers. It was foolish of me if i expect that we would not encounter one of her admirers, to which this man apparently is. As we sit near the pond, i conversed with the rest of the group, however, i found myself keep losing my focus as i keep watching Tagadhur tries to attract Yuuqi's attention. The man is not as subtle as i thought as he tries to sit between me and Yuuqi, i feel the same pang and jealousy but thought to myself that i need to be the one who take the higher road here.

I realize the group haven't ate yet, so i went to the market to buy few boxes of Bento. I remember Caqi's wife is pregnant and one of the healers i had a pleasure of acquainted with said that pregnant woman should not eat raw food. When i return and distributed the box, everyone starts to eat except for Ibakha because she was resting. The feeling of uneasiness keeps pulsing through my being, these new feelings i have is really unpleasant akin to seasickness but worst. I feel myself keeps clenching my fist and tries to take a deep breath, but it keeps getting worst. At one point, Yuuqi wishes to return to the inn. I took this chance and approach her, offering my hand to walk with her back to the inn. Tagadhur tries to come with us and Yuuqi rejected him politely.

Then i did the unthinkable... Something that even myself find shocked that i would do that kind of action... I told Tagadhur that if i cannot escort my Fiancee safely back to her inn, what kind of a man i am? My mouth might have said it in politeness but in my mind it was a sword, dripping with venom. The worst was, i did not regret saying it. The only regret i had was Yuuqi might be angry at me for my insolence, claiming something that she has not even acknowledge at that time. I was new, too new to this raw feelings and emotions and find myself lost. All my life, i never dislike a person without clear cause. I hated those slavers and pirates who burnt down that coastal village seven years ago. I fought them and lost because of my inexperienced self-was too confident in my own ability. Spent a year in their stockade, manage to escape only thanks to Nhaama's intervention.

At that time, however, i feel every time i see Tagadhur tries to talk to Yuuqi and his questioning glance he throws at me is scraping and irritating me to no end.  I disliked this man who tries to woo someone who is not even mine. That was low of me and i found myself in later days pondering about this. I was ready to stand in shame had Yuuqi deny my words, but i will never walk away. A part of me was wondering what drives me to do such action and stance? that even if she denies it, my shamed self still won't go. I would later realize that this is the first time i realized that i am falling for this woman...and no matter how i deny it, i am falling hard for her.

To my dismay and the next shocking thing was that she acknowledges that her family had betrothed her with me. I swear at that time it took me all my self-control not to just jump into the pond in joy. I was known to do weird things to express my happiness... Opposite to my happiness, Tagadhur expression was the epitome of disappointment. I applaud him for doing well to mask it and at that time i truly wish we could be a friend. It was ironic, because a moment ago i was ready to fight him right there. It seems that i am not as mature as i think i am... The last words Tagadhur whispered to me was "Give her whatever she wants, even if she asks for moon or stars...she deserves it" i applaud the heart of this man but does he thinks i will give Yuuqi less? i would give her even more.

Our walk home was quiet until the fireworks start to illuminate the sky that night. She seems to be excited and i explained to her about the Tanabata festival. Where the buffalo herder meet the weaver girl during the peak of summer. A symbol of everlasting love, even though distance and time separate. It brings a smile to her face. Suddenly i feel like taking a long detour, however, the inn was at sight. I dropped her by and goes back to the dojo. I was happy, and sleep was hard to be found... I dont care

I am in love with Dayuuqi...