#and changed all our street signs n shit to be french instead

[dkettchen]

Brennan: in the mountains of Luxembourg

me, from Luxembourg: *gets jumpscared*

me: mf we ain't got mountains in Luxembourg

[aliasimagines]

Miraculous: Tales of Kick-Ass

requested by a lovely anon 💕

Dave Lizewski x fem!reader (miraculous au)

warnings: cursing.

word count: 1814

a/n: Dave has a kwami!! Cause if we are going with Miraculous au, we are doing it properly.

“I am here again, live ,with New York’s favourite superhero battling against his archnemesis in the background. But do not worry! I just saw Hit Girl arrive at the scene and they seem to have everything under control.” the reporter, Lizzie Blonde, says through the tv in Atomic Comics. You are not sure when all of this has started, when New York turned into a battlefield for superheros and supervillains. New York used to be normal. Alright, scratch that, New York was always one crazy place. 

Not that you mind particularly, you were always a fan of superheroes and comics and to see them, in your city? That was beyond exciting. Not to mention your major crush on kick-Ass.

You took a sip from your milkshake and looked around the comic store. Dave should be here by now. Not that you are surprised he is not here. He is always late nowadays. Marty and Todd fanboyed next to you about hit Girl as you kept looking at your phone and the door, waiting for your best friend to give any sign of him.

In the tv the superhero pair just took out the Motherfucker’s minions.  You sigh a bit worried. What if Dave got in trouble? What if he is in that part of the city where the fight is going on? It’s only a few blocks away and if he got hurt it would explain why he is not responding to your messages..

You hesitantly stood up and walked outside the shop. You heard a loud crash in the distance. You bit your lip, debating whether you should go and look for Dave or not. You heard a loud cheer coming from outside, the heros probably won. Again.

You finally decided to go and look for Dave, so you started speed walking toward the street you saw in the news. Maybe you will not only find Dave but see Kick-Ass too! 

Of course Dave is more important but.. You saw a green figure flash from one of the rooftops. You gasped, Kick-Ass jumped on a building, only a few meters away from you. 

The hero seemed to notice you and waved his hand at you. 

You almost fainted, but went to grab your phone to take a picture of him but by the time you looked up he was long gone. You looked around confused but quickly remembered why you came. You started running again, when from an alleyway someone ran into you.

“AAA”

“AAAA” 

“Oh my god y/n!”

“Dave! What are you doing here?” you grasp your chest, hoping your heart won’t fall out of its place.

“I could ask the same!”

“I was worried about you! So I came looking and..Are you alright?” you carefully touch his cheek where a small cut is, slightly bleeding.  The boy slightly brushes your hand away and tries to hide the light pink flash on his cheek.

“I’m fine, I was on my way to Atomic’s when the fight started and I figured I would be safer here.” he lied effortlessly. You nodded.

“I’m glad you are okay.” you say, before remembering what happened a few seconds ago. “Oh my gosh, Dave! I was walking on the street looking for you and you will never believe what happened! Kick-Ass, The Kick-Ass saw me and waved! Ahh! It was so awesome!”

Dave laughed softly, “I bet it was. Let’s go back to Atomic’s, okay?”

 You guys spend most of your afternoon there, talking about the fight and the superhero duo.

“..so in conclusion, I love Hit Girl and she is so awesome. But Kick-Ass? Gosh, he is so hot!” you gesture with your hands. Dave clears his throat and lifts his drink to his lips. Marty rolls his eyes at you.

“You can’t even see his face!” he throws his hand in the air. Dave and Todd start laughing.

“Hey, man, leave the girl alone.” Dave says, slightly nudging your side. “But really y/n, Kick-Ass could be a nerd like me, for all you know.”

“That would be some Peter Parker shit.” you say grabbing a french fry. “But, I don’t really care for his looks, like.. The idea of him? You know? Like  he is a motherducking hero for Stan Lee's sake!"

" That's kinda.. I don't know. Shallow? Having a crush on someone you don't even know? " Dave says and barely noticeably tucks a small piece of pizza in his pocket. Before you can say anything Todd beats you to it. 

"Well that's rich coming from the guy who was practically drooling over Scarlet Witch in The Ultimates." 

"That's a completely different thing." 

Todd opens his mouth to respond when the harsh sound of the news channel floods the comic shop. You all turn to the tv and see that New York is once again under attack. Dave furrows his eyebrows. 

"Twice?" he asks himself. Before he jumps up from the booth you all are sitting at. 

"I just uhm… I just remembered I have to rush home to help my dad!" 

"Yo dude, what the heck?" yells Todd after your best friend. 

"Sorry, guys I have to run!" and with that Dave is out the door, leaving all his friends including you, confused and kinda upset. He finds the first alleyway and soon his kwami flies out of his pocket. 

"Dave? What's going on? We never have to fight twice a day." the little kwami, Kai says. His name is not actually Kai but as he is a lost kwami he never learned what his name is so Dave was the one to give him the name Kai. 

"I don't know, little dude but we better check it out." 

There wasn't anything big, Chris Damico just couldn't take the fact that he lost again and angrily tried to strike at the innocent citizens of New York in hopes of destroying Kick-Ass too. Instead he ended up getting his.. Well getting his ass kicked. 

Dave didn't change back just yet, instead he jumped from rooftop to rooftop to get home. It got pretty late so it would be stupid to go back to Atomic Comics as you guys probably left. He felt bad for bailing on you again. He hated leaving you. Even if he could play superhero and save people. The look on your face every time he rushed away to a fight? Ugh, he hates it. 

Dave jumps down to an alleyway to transform back when a girl turns into the alley. Wait. It's not just a girl, it's you! 

Dave tries to jump behind trash bags to hide but you already saw him. 

"Kick-Ass?" he hears your voice. He sighs and comes out of his impromptu hiding spot. 

"Haha, guilty as charged."

"Oh my gosh, we met earlier! You waved at me, do you remember? Ah, of course you don't, you meet so many people every day." you would have kept on rambling if it wasn't for Dave. He tried his hardest not to giggle at your fangirling, that he knows oh so well and said. 

" I actually do remember you y/-, random citizen! " 

Fuck! Dave curses himself. He almost said your name! Stupid, stupid, stupid! 

You did seem to hear anything but the fact that your superhero crush remembered you from earlier. You felt your cheeks heating up a bit. 

"You.. You do? Gosh, really? That's so awesome, you are like… ahgh you are so awesome."

"You think so?" Kick-Ass asks, smiling. "Well, you seem like a pretty awesome girl, too. What is a pretty, awesome girl like you doing out this late?" 

Dave feels weird talking to you like this, cause you don't know he is actually your best friend but… Dave also finds that a bit helpful? He could never compliment you as Dave, not like this. He would end up blushing and dying from embarrassment. But Kick-Ass? He is a cool dude, who has no problem flirting with the ladies. 

"Oh, well I was hanging with my friends at Atomic Comics." 

"So you like superheros?" he asks, leaning against a wall in a 'cool way'. 

"Oh, yeah."you nod, gulping."I love them." 

You slowly mingled in conversation. Dave softly flirted with you every once in a while and you always responded with a sweet smile and some nice comeback. Both of you were so in the conversation, you didn't even bother to pay attention to your surroundings. Dave for example, didn't even hear the beeping, the warning that he would transfer back from Kick-Ass to Dave Lizewski. When he realized what was going on it was already too late. His kwami fell tiredly into his hands. 

"Oh shit, oh no, oh shit, shit.. Aah." Dave looked around for help, any help but it was worthless. You already saw him transform. You know. 

Dave slowly, terrified of your reaction, gazed over to you. 

But you just stared at him.

"Look, n/n-"

"This is some Peter Parker shit." you whispered,still starring. But then you snapped out of it. "What the actual fuck, Dave?" 

"I know, I know, I am so sorry y/n! I couldn't tell you and fuck! I am so sorry for flirting with you, it's just I could never have the confidence to do that as Dave and- Ah, I just ruined our friendship and I think I should just leave.." he turned around and tried to walk away but you grabbed his hand and pulled him back. You quickly pressed your lips against his. Dave barely had time to react, he froze. Was this really happening? Is this a dream? 

" You are a real asshole, Dave. "you say after pulling away." You are lucky I love you. "

"You what?" Dave asks with his eyes wide open. "I thought you had a 'major crush' on Kick-Ass." 

"Well, yeah, but I like you better." you say with a small smile. Before Dave can say anything you spot the tired kwami in his hand. "Dave, what the fuck is that?" 

"Oh shit." he pulls out a small snack from his pocket and gives it to Kai who starts munching on it immediately. "He is Kai. He is my kwami, he is basically the source of my powers." 

"Uhm, hi." you wave at the small creature. 

The kwami looks up at you and then at Dave. 

"This is wrooong." 

"Shut up, little dude." he turns to you, scratching his back with his free hand. "So, uhm can I walk you home… as not your best friend?" 

You shake your head with a laugh. 

"I want nothing more." you take his hand and you two walk with huge smiles on both of your faces. 

Maybe this was an accident, but at the end of the day Kick-Ass defeated his enemy, saved New York twice, but it was Dave Lizewski who ended up getting the girl.

Here's how I imagined Kai, his kwami (i am no digital artist, i know it look horrible 😂😂) :

taglist: @sethcohenluvr @your-hispanichufflepuff

[trustsalvatorewriting]

Let’s Fall In Love For the Night - Kol Mikaelson x Reader

Trust’s Note: Hey, sorry I died. I lost inspiration to keep writing so I decided to take a break. Anyway, I’ve always been in love with Kol Mikaelson, so here’s an x reader based on Let’s Fall In Love for the Night by Finneas.

Kol Mikaelson x Reader / Elijah x Reader

___________

Kol Mikaelson was a thousand years old, and he was a goddamn stereotype.

He wasn’t sure how it happened. How he’d managed to become the fool that was in love with his brother’s girl. After all, he could’ve gotten any girl he wanted, and all he would’ve had to do was take two steps out of the compound -- and oh, darling, he’d tried. Every time he would cross paths with you and Elijah, he found find himself wandering the streets of the French Quarter not ten minutes later, searching for only God knows what.

It had only gotten worse when he found himself a regular at the bar Camille worked at. She would bury him in questions, asking what drove him to the bar at three o’clock in the morning and how he’d managed to drink an entire bottle of scotch within the hour. Usually, by the third drink, he found himself wanting to admit the truth. He wanted to tell Camille that in a thousand years, he hadn’t felt this way about anyone else. He wanted to tell her that every time you walked into the room, he could feel his heartbeat quickening -- a rush he’d last gotten when he was a witch, practicing spells with the coven a thousand years ago.

He wanted to tell her that when you sat next to him and told him drunken stories, there was nothing he wanted to do but wrap his arms around you and carry you to bed. To be the one to kiss you on your forehead and sleep next to you every night, rather than the eldest Mikaelson brother.

I loved it when you talk that nerdy shit We’re in our twenties, talking thirties shit

 “If love be rough with you, be rough with love,” Kol read quietly, your legs draped over his lap. “Prick love for pricking, and you beat love down. Give me a case to put my visage in: a visor for a visor! What curious I - What curious eye quote both deformities? Here are the beetle brows shall blush for me.”

As he finished his sentence, you couldn’t help but let out a laugh. “I’m sorry, but what the fuck is Shakespeare saying?”

Kol looked at you, shocked, as if you’d said the most crude thing he’d ever heard. “Have you never read Shakespeare before?”

“Oh, I’ve read Shakespeare,” You chuckled, grabbing the book from his hands and folding it shut, carelessly throwing it down on the nearest table. “He’s bullshit.”

“He is the most famous writer on the face of the planet,” Kol crossed his arms, despite the signature half-smile making its way across his face. He did enjoy these conversations he had with you. The ones where he could pretend that it was him that you were in love with, rather than somebody else. “How is it possible you don’t enjoy his work?”

“I just don’t.” He stared at you for a moment, and you sighed. “Okay, fine. I just don’t understand what he’s saying half the time. It’s annoying, and it makes me feel stupid.”

“Darling, you aren’t stupid.” Kol lifted your legs off his lap, moving closer to you. He placed his hand on the side of your face, his heart quickening when you leaned into it. In that moment, he allowed himself to believe you were his. To believe it was him that you were going to bed with that night. To believe that he could treat you half as well as Elijah could have. He allowed himself to believe it, because deep inside, he knew it was the closest he’d ever get to having you by his side.

I’m the boy that your boy hoped that you would avoid. Don’t waste your eyes on jealous guys. Fuck that noise.

“Am I interrupting something?” Elijah’s voice rang through the room, and the moment was gone, his beliefs shattered the moment you got up from the loveseat and ran toward his elder brother. Kol swallowed the lump in his throat as he watched Elijah greet you with a kiss on your forehead, indulging you in a conversation about an antique he’d found at the store, followed by the excuse that it ‘reminded him of you.’

Elijah would greet you every week or so with small presents he’d found around the Quarter. Only occasionally did he choose to keep the surprises private -- though Kol wasn’t exactly sure what was private about having you walk around the compound wearing a one of a kind necklace from the 1800s.

Kol cleared his throat, rising up from the loveseat, his eyes barely leaving the ground. “I’ll find you another novel to read, Y/N.”

He left the room quietly, too focused on the patterned carpet to see the sad you look you gave him when he walked away.

That was how he’d ended up here, his fingers tracing over an old copy of Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein. He was sure there was a copy hidden somewhere in the Mikaelson library -- likely one signed by Shelley herself -- but he wanted to give you a copy of your own. Something to remember him by when he was inevitably daggered by his brothers upon the realization of his feelings for you.

“You can’t keep coming here,” Camille stated, pouring another round of bourbon into his glass. “You’re worrying my customers.”

Her eyes trailed to the book in front of him. She raised her eyebrows in surprise, and Kol grit his teeth in response. “You poured my bourbon. You can walk away.”

“I didn’t take you for a gothic writing kind of guy,” She uttered under her breath. Kol didn’t respond, instead downing the glass of bourbon in the hopes that she would change the subject. “Who’s the girl?”

“There isn’t a girl.” Kol leaned forward, pupils dilating as his eyes bored into Camille’s. “Walk away.”

A smile seemed to break out on her face. She was genuinely amused by his tactics. “You don’t seriously think I leave my house without taking vervain.”

A low growl escaped his mouth. “What do you want from me?”

“What do you want from me?” She questioned, tossing her rag across the counter. “Last I checked, there are five bars that are closer to your house than this place, all of them with top shelf drinks that every Mikaelson boy would probably pine after; but instead, you come here, to the only place where there’s a waitress with a masters in psychology.”

Kol’s eye twitched in anger. He opened his mouth to snap at her, only to be shut up by the expectant look on her face. She was treating him the same way she treated Klaus -- like a child. Like a lonely, vulnerable child.

He hated it.

He was supposed to be the selfish Mikaelson. The mischievous one, who always found a way to go against his own brothers. People were supposed to fear him, if not be charmed by him. He should’ve taken you when he had the chance.

Let’s fall in love for the night and forget in the morning.

Silently, he tossed a few hundred dollars at Camille, making his way back to the compound. He dusted off his jacket, pulling at the collars so they were turned outward. As he turned the corner, he saw you standing in the middle of the courtyard, trying to get through more than ten pages of Romeo and Juliet.

Before he could stop himself, he grabbed your wrists and held you close, softly pressing his lips to yours. You smelled of roses, as if you’d just walked out of a garden not moments ago. He smelled of booze and an old cologne that you couldn’t seem to place. His hands raised to tangled themselves in your hair as he held you close, refusing to allow for even a centimeter of space between the two of you.

Finally, he broke away, resting his forehead against yours. “You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to do that.”

“Kol, I--”

He cut you off, his eyes desperate, pleading at you to let him speak. “Tell me that you don’t love me. Tell me that you feel nothing for me, and you’ll never have to worry about me again.”

You held his face in the palms of your hands, holding him carefully as if he might break. The words left your lips before you could bring yourself to stop them. “I love you, Kol.”

A sad smile seemed to make his way across his face, a tear making his way down his face. “And I, you.”

I know better than to call you mine.

Elijah watched as the pair wrapped their arms around each other, the space between them non-existent. He sighed and lifted up the red rose between his fingertips, taking the scissor he’d used to cut off the thorns, and using it to snip the flower off its stem.

After all, Kol needed you more than he did.

[noonachronicles]

Forget Me Not

Lee Hoseok/Wonho X Reader

Word Count: 22k

Warnings: Tamed usage of curse words. Smut, but cheesy, bad smut . It’s almost like I wrote it bad intentionally? (don’t even read it tbh). Also some of this was written during a cold medicine haze. So any part you don’t like was written while I was on cold meds and/or written at three in the morning and you can’t blame me. Everything you enjoy I was fully conscious for. Also I didn’t proofread this. I tried, but I’m so tired.

Genre: Mostly fluff, some smut, angst? FWB to True Love lololol. 

A/N: Happy (belated) Birthday to my beautiful angel baby, Sara (@memoiresofaneternaldreamer​ ). I’m unexplainably sorry that this took me so long to get to you and I’m grateful for your endless patience with my shit. 🤣 Why you tolerate me I’ll never understand but it means everything to me to know that no matter what’s going on, I can always count on you to be there. For sticking with me through my worst, I wanted to give you some of my best.

Did I also use your birthday as an excuse to write out what is essentially 20k words worth of praise for Wonho based off of the disgusting amount of deeply internalized love I apparently have hidden away for him? Yes. Please don’t tell Changkyun. Now, let’s get to it.

Saturday 

Hoseok 8:40PM: Right. Fucking. Now.

You 8:45PM: k

Monday 

You 9:38PM: Busy?

Hoseok 9:40PM: On my way ;)

Thursday 

You 8:54PM: Now.

You 8:58PM: Please. :)

Today 

Hoseok 9:03PM: Need you.  

Hoseok looked down at his watch as he was stopped at the red light. He'd already sent the message to let you know he was on his way over which gave him about 15 minutes to get to your place before you got too impatient. He had two choices. He could drive straight and make it to your place a little ahead of time. Or, he could turn right and stop at the store to get a bottle of that wine he knew you loved.

When the light turned green he made a split decision and went right. He might be a little late but your irritation with his tardiness would disappear at the sight of the wine.

In the parking lot of the store there was a homeless man begging for change. Hoseok would have to choose between walking passed the old man or stopping to pull out his wallet. As he always did, he stopped. He grabbed a few bills from his wallet to give to the man and talked to him for a while to see if he needed anything from inside before actually going in. He found the wine quickly but then he chose to get something to go with it. He eyed the fresh flowers and picked out a bright mix of spring colors, he knew you’d like those better than something more romantic like roses.

He could hear your complaining already, “You're not my boyfriend. Stop doing boyfriend things. I'll get the wrong idea.”

He could also already see the bright blush on your cheeks as you sniffed the petals and placed the flowers in a vase while he opened the wine. He smiled at the thought of it and made his way to checkout. There he had chosen to stand behind a woman that looked like she was nearly ready to go crazy. Two crying toddlers stomping around in the shopping cart and screaming at the top of their lungs.

Looking at his phone he thought about sending you a message that kids were the worst, but he didn't want you to know he'd stopped. The gifts were meant to be a surprise after all. He couldn't help but listen to the conversation happening before him as time ticked by.

“I'm sorry ma’am, that's still not enough.” the cashier frowned as the mother dug inside her purse for change.

“What if we remove the chicken? So it would just been the rice and vegatables.”

“I can pay for her order. All of it.” Hoseok stepped forward placing his things on the conveyor. “Just add my two items to her order and I can pay for it.”

“Oh, please sir…”

“It's not a handout, there's no need to look so ashamed. It's a gift between friends. Feed your boys well tonight. They're growing after all.” He smiled as tears built in the woman's eyes.

“Thank you.” She whispered, trying not to breakdown in front of her kids. He handed the change from the cashier to the woman who tried and failed to deny it from the persistent Hoseok.

Feeling good, better than good, he made his way back to his sleek, silver, sports car. As he made his way to you he thought about all the choices he'd made that had brought him here and how happy he was with his decisions. Maybe he was running late and going down the road with more potholes than the other but it was worth it. You were worth it to him.

He was nearly to your place when someone else's choices that day changed everything. A delivery driver that had chosen to have an extra drink with dinner. Who chose to take off down the road instead of sleeping it off in the cab of his truck. Who chose to flip through the stations on his radio rather than look up to see the red light. Whose choices brought him crashing into the silver sports car that was on its way to you.

~~~

Downtown always seemed so busy, so alive, especially on a friday night. People out celebrating having survived the work week, couples on dates, college kids looking for a party so they could avoid any weekend assignments until Sunday. The people were often rowdy and loud, the traffic most times louder. Movie theaters were packed and lines at all the best restaurants took longer than the movies lasted. Despite all of that, it had been a really wonderful second date so far. At least that’s what you’d been thinking about as Loey walked you down the sidewalk with his magnificently long arm over your shoulder, talking enthusiastically about the movie you’d just seen together.

“...but, anyway, that’s why I had really wanted to see that one. And I know it wasn’t really your thing, so I appreciate you going with me.” he was saying as you brought yourself back to the conversation. “Did you at least like it though?”

“Umm,” you released a heavy puff of air, “I mean, it was...nice. I liked most of it. There were a lot of, um…”

“Boobs.” he said with a nod, “Yeah, I’m sorry about that. I swear I didn’t know. I wasn’t trying to like… set any moods.”

You laughed at his genuine nervousness, “It’s okay, I’m not upset. It was just an observation.”

“Well if you were upset and you’re just being sweet about it now, dinner will more than make up for it.” he beamed, “I got us a reservation at the best restaurant. It’s so popular right now, I’m amazed I got us in.”

Your blood prickled in your veins just slightly and you looked at your surroundings. You’d gotten so lost in your thoughts on the walk from the theatre. With his arm around you, you hadn’t even needed to pay attention to where you were walking. The street you were on was familiar, one you’d successfully avoided for months. Your old favorite coffee shop, your old favorite jewelry store, your old favorite bookshop. Everything you’d given up for fear of not having enough restraint to not walk into the restaurant you were walking towards right now. The one with a line of people outside the door, waiting enthusiastically for their chance to experience the best french fusion cuisine in the entire city. The sign above the door, gilded script on dark wood, read La Boucherie. Though to you it might as well have read Turn Back Now in bright, blinking neon lights.

“You don’t seem excited.” Loey said looking down at you with a lopsided pout, “You didn’t happen to go vegan since our last date, did you?”

“No, no.” you shook your head and plastered on your best smile, “This is great. I’ve heard really wonderful things.”

“We can go somewhere else.” he was a puppy, always so eager to please.

You grabbed his face in your hands and forced his big doe eyes to meet yours, “It’s fine. I don’t care where we go as long as it’s together. Also I just want to eat so...”

He clutched at his chest dramatically, “You really are after my heart.”

Once inside the restaurant you tried to keep breathing. Your belly was in knots and you weren’t sure how you were going to stomach a meal with your nerves twisted so tight. There was sweat beading at your hairline by the time the hostess sat you down, but you kept your smile on your face. If he was going to see you here, you were going to look happy. Happy without him.

By the main course you had calmed down quite a bit. Your table was in the main dining area and you knew that on weekends, since they were so busy, he would be working the bar. There hadn’t even been a glimpse of him all night, and the conversation with Loey was going really well. Your stomach aching from laughter rather than nerves. By the time the two of you were sitting, waiting for dessert and after dinner coffee to arrive, you had forgotten where you even were. You hadn’t thought about it at all when you excused yourself to go to the restroom. The restroom that was next to the bar. You’d even made it in and out without a hassle. It was only when you’d walked out of the restroom that your eyes fell behind the redwood bar top. You’d frozen, your heels jammed into some invisible cement, and you weren’t entirely sure you were still breathing either.

Four mirrored panels lined the wall behind the bar reflecting the packed tables, shelves on either side of the mirrors were lined with bottles of the top shelf brands that were offered. Everything else was well stocked, and well hidden, behind the bar itself. It was a sleek look and one you’d always found aesthetically pleasing.

The man behind the bar you’d used to find pleasing as well. His black hair was disheveled. The way you’d used to like, bangs swept across his forehead. They had clearly been busy all night. He had the sleeves of his white button up rolled up to his elbows, showing off the veins in his hardworking forearms. He was helping a customer who had apparently said something funny because you found yourself blinded by his incredible smile. Very suddenly you felt sick.

Honestly, standing there you weren’t sure if you were pissed off or aroused at the sight of him, which only left you more frustrated and flustered than before. After watching him for far too long you remembered Loey and found the strength to leave. At least the strength to get to where the bar met the dining area. It was there you hesitated. You were already here and if you could help it you were never coming back, you’d reasoned with yourself. You would only have this one opportunity to say your peace until you never saw him again. After a deep breath you marched over to an open space at the bar and looked at him expectantly.

He was helping someone new at this point but he noticed you immediately. His smile grew bigger than before and he held up a finger to let you know he’d be with you in a moment. You scowled slightly, having been trying to look angry but wondering if maybe you’d come off as happy to see him. He was either happy to see you or just being his generally happy self. When he was done at the other side of the bar he pushed his sleeves back up and moved over to where you were standing.

“Hey, what can I get for you?” he asked, dark brown eyes sparkling as they looked you over.  

“I don’t want anything.”

A smug smirk spread across his face, “Oh, just came over to see me? I’m flattered.”

“Don’t be.” you snapped, “I just wanted to tell you, I’m here on a date. It’s going really well and I really like him. So I might have sex tonight...with him.”

His eyes went wide with surprise and he laughed, looking both amused and confused by your declaration. “I-I’m...that’s great? Congratulations.”

“I’m really happy now. I wanted you to know how happy I am.” you felt your confidence waiver the longer you stood in front of him. “So that’s why I came over here. To let you know I’m fine, better than fine.”

“Well I am happy you’re happy. I guess.” he nodded casually.

“Yeah, and no thanks to you.”

“Wh- I...I’m sorry. Do we know each other? You seem really mad at me.” he said finally just needing some clarification over this bizarre conversation.

“Seriously?” you scoffed, unsure how much longer you could hold up because you were pretty sure this man was trying to break your heart for a second time. “Are you joking? What...are we pretending like we never happened now? You just moved all the way on from me.”

“I...I’m so sorry. I wish I knew what you were talking about. If we had spent time together, that’s definitely something I would have wanted to remember.” he looked genuinely sorry, which made no sense to you. You weren’t crazy.

“Spent time together?” your jaw dropped to the floor, “I know we weren’t exactly dating but I thought we at least… You know what? Forget it. Just, I don’t know, go fuck yourself, Hoseok.”

You didn’t even give him the chance to process your words before turning on your heel and leaving. You were already almost in rage tears when you’d gotten back to the table. Loey’s smile instantly fading at the sight of you and turning into concern. After apologizing profusely you grabbed your things and begged him to stay and enjoy dessert, promising to call him when you were home. He was incredibly confused but you’d made it clear you needed, and very much wanted to be alone.

You made it out to the curb before the first tears hit and you threw your jacket on before starting down the sidewalk. Behind you there was someone calling for you to stop. Looking over your shoulder you could see it wasn’t Loey, it wasn’t anyone familiar at all so you kept going. You weren’t in the mood for being sexually harassed tonight. He was not relenting, once you passed the second building with him still on your tail you reached into your purse and wrapped your hand around the mace you kept.

“Ma’am! Miss! Please, stop. Ma’am. Jesus Christ, would you stop?” he called behind you.

Finally nearing the end of the block, tears streaking your cheeks, you whipped around furiously. “Listen, you fucking creep, I am clearly not interested. And the fact that you’re chasing after a vulnerable, sobbing mess of a woman really goes to show what kind of sick predator you truly are. Now step back before I mace you until you are forever blinded.”

“Wow…” he said, raising his eyebrows and taking several steps back “Are you done? I’m not trying to fuck you, okay? I saw you in the bar talking to Hoseok. Are you friends with him?”

You calmed slightly, but just barely. “I thought, at the very least, but apparently I wasn’t anything to him but forgettable.”

“Um… okay.” the stranger placed his hands together in front of his mouth, trying to decide the best way to say whatever it was he was going to say. “Here’s the thing. Hoseok was in a really bad car accident. He doesn’t remember most of the last six years of his life.”

“What?” you asked, unsure of what else to even say.

“I know it sounds... nuts. I don’t know what you know about memory loss, but they said he has post-traumatic amnesia. His is a hefty cocktail of retrograde amnesia and short term memory loss.” he shrugged, “The guy doesn’t even remember he was in an accident most days.”

“Fuck,” you muttered looking over this complete stranger, “You are the most legit wingman that has ever existed, but you can go back to your friend and let him know I’m over it. I’m over him.”

“No, listen, seriously! This isn’t some joke. The only reason he remembers who I am is because we’ve been best friends since grade school. I swear on my life, if you come back tomorrow, he won’t even remember tonight happened.”

With your heart pounding against your chest, your first thought was to wonder if he’d really been in some horrible accident. Your second was how you hadn’t been there for him if he was. Tears threatened the backs of your eyes once more and you took a deep breath.

You were pretty sure you knew the answer before the question left your mouth, but you had to ask anyway to be certain. “When was it? The accident...what was the day?”

Before he even got the date out all the way, you knew it was the night Hoseok was supposed to be coming to see you. It had been over a year but that day stuck with you like it had been one of the worst days of your life. It was the beginning of the first time you’d ever had your heartbroken.

Closing your eyes, a few tears fell down your cheeks. It was a lot to take in if it was true. If it was true that meant that he hadn’t intentionally hurt you. You exhaled deeply,  “Thank you... for telling me. I have to go.”

You had already turned your back to him, more than ready to leave, when he said “Are you yeosin?”

“Excuse me?” you asked looking over your shoulder.

“Did Hoseok ever call you yeosin?”

This time you turned all the way back around as you thought back to one of the last times you’d been together.

Postcoital cuddling in his bed, tangled up in the sheets together. He’d been petting your hair, keeping you in a staring contest. Prolonged eye contact was his favorite game to play with you because it never took long for you to get too flustered to even look at him and he reveled in it. You could be anywhere. In bed or out to eat, alone or in a crowded room, it didn’t matter. He’d touch you, something small. Petting your hair, his thumb rubbing circles on your hip, running his foot against yours. Then he’d lock eyes with you and smirk while your stomach got tied up in knots, your core covered in warm honey. The easiest way to get you in the mood.

“Damn it, Hoseok!” you’d whined and then laughed, blushing as you’d finally looked away.

He’d only laughed, pulling you closer, and you’d sunk comfortably into the warmth of him, “Oh yeosin, maybe one day.”

“Why do you call me that?” you’d asked pushing his bangs off his forehead.

“Yeosin?” you’d nodded, and he’d smiled, “Because for me, that’s what you are.”

You’d rolled your eyes at his response, “That doesn’t make any sense. I’m not even your girlfriend.”

“You’re more than that. You’re my goddess, my queen.”

When you came back from the memory, his friend was still looking at you expectantly. You shook your head, “It doesn’t matter. I really need to go now.”

“Please, it does matter! If you ever cared about him at all...please, just please come back tomorrow.”

You sighed, “Maybe.”

“Okay! Maybe, I’ll take a maybe over a no.” he sounded genuinely excited, “My name is Minhyuk. Come straight to the bar tomorrow. I’ll look for you. We can talk.”

~~~

La Boucherie. You’d stood in front of the restaurant window for twenty minutes. Just eyeing the curl and flow of the cursive gold lettering that matched the lettering on the sign over the door. You weren’t even sure why you had come. Still not even positive this wasn’t some insane ruse. All day, and most of the night, you had debated on whether or not to actually show up. It would have been easy to go back and forth for the rest of your life contemplating whether or not you believed the validity of the story you were told. One thing you knew for sure though, for the last year of your life Hoseok had stayed on your mind. And even after months of anger and pain, seeing him had still made your heart race at a different pace than any of the other guys you’d tried being with after him. So you couldn’t help but think that it would be worth it to find out. For closures sake, you’d justified to yourself.

Saturday at the restaurant was just as bad as Friday or worse maybe, you’d thought walking into the thick crowd of people at the door. You told the hostess you were there to see Minhyuk and she waved you into the bar area. He was there, like he’d said, and as enthusiastic as ever. When he looked up to see you his face lit up like a kid on Christmas morning. At least someone remembered you. He made you your drink of choice and practically begged you to stick around until he got a free moment to sneak away. You sat at the bar, sipping on your drink and scrolling through your phone. Minhyuk came by often to check up on you and make sure you didn’t need anything. He even made sure someone brought you an appetizer on the house. Nearly every time he passed he thanked you again for being there and for staying.

“You’re not flirting with him are you?”

You had just lifted your drink to your lips for a sip and had to actively try not to choke at the sound of his voice. You eyed him through the mirror behind the bar. He was smiling, head quirked slightly as he looked at the back of your head, waiting for you to notice him.

Dabbing your mouth with a cocktail napkin you turned to look at him. “Excuse me?”

“The bartender. You’re not flirting with him are you?” he asked and leaned against the bar between you and the guy who had been on the stool next to you.

He was so close you weren’t sure you could speak. You put your glass down slowly. “What would it matter to you if I was?”

“It’s none of my business. I know that. I just think there is something inherently wrong with the most beautiful woman in this entire building flirting with him. I felt a moral obligation to object. I say all of this with love, mind you, the guy’s my best friend.”

You placed your hand over your mouth to try and hide your smile, but the blush was already creeping over your cheeks and up your neck. He was a meal standing right in front of you. Tight back jeans ripped over the muscles in his thighs, his white button down from the night before was replaced with a black one to match the jeans. You loathed how impossibly soft, and pink his lips looked as he pouted at you slightly. Not to mention the way he was staring at you like you were the only other person in the world, forget being just the most beautiful woman in the building.

It was unfair, if this was true, you thought to yourself. If he was really standing in front of you looking like that. You knowing how good it felt to kiss those lips and at one point having been able to kiss them whenever you’d wanted. To already know the feel of his hands on your body, but be expected to do nothing about it because if he truly did have amnesia you were certain that kissing him like you wanted to now would be some form of sexual harassment. Even if he wouldn’t remember it tomorrow. Maybe even worse that he wouldn’t remember it the next day.

You gulped, “Well, who would you suggest I flirt with then?”

He raised his hand to chest, “Wow, I’m so sorry. Was I not being as obvious as I thought I was being? Beautiful, you should be flirting with me.”

“Oh, you were definitely being obvious. I just wanted to hear you say it.” you smirked and brought your drink back to your lips.    

“Good.” he held out his hand, “I’m Hoseok.”

You bit your lip, trying to read his face. Did he really not remember you? Even from last night when you’d kind of gone off on him? You placed your hand in his, the feeling was electric.

“I’m y/n.” you said a little awkwardly, thrown by having to introduce yourself to someone who knew you.

“Fitting, a beautiful name for a beautiful woman.” You suppressed an eye roll you would have given old Hoseok. “Would you mind if I sat with you for awhile?”

He still held your hand in his, his thumb rubbing gentle circles over the top. With your free hand you motioned to the now empty seat behind him. He sat down, keeping your hand, and once he was situated he locked eyes with you. It felt hard to breathe, he was the definition of breathtaking. You grew warm all over, like being showered in sunlight. Then you started to feel the all too familiar tug in your belly. The tiniest sigh fell from your lips as he continued to circle his thumb on the back of your hand. You turned away first, per usual. He chuckled lightly as you took a sip of your drink.

“Um,” you put your glass down, “The bartender...he’s your friend, you said?”

He nodded, “Best friend for many years.”

“How do you know him? Do you work here?”

“Actually, I own this restaurant. Him,” he nodded towards Minhyuk, “I met back when we were in school.”

“Oh,” you nodded. Pretending to be impressed by something you already knew was harder than you expected. “How long have you owned this place?”

“Almost six months.” he said confidently. There was a complete and total belief that what he’d said was the truth. It wasn’t. Hoseok had owned this restaurant for over seven years already.

“You’re sure we’ve never met?” you asked curiously.

“Absolutely positive. I could never forget a smile like yours. That way you blush...” he boldly brushed his thumb over your cheek, “I would never forget you.”

He stayed with you at the bar for some time playing with your hand as you tried to casually ask him questions about your past lives together. You focused on reading his face when he answered and it didn’t hurt that his face had always been one of your favorite views. You remained unsure if you were trying to catch him in a lie or were just amazed at the fact that he might have actually forgotten everything. On top of everything running through your head there was also something strangely exciting about sitting there experiencing him flirt with you again the way he had the very first time you met.

If you were being entirely honest with yourself you’d missed him. It had been so easy to be angry and to hate him when you hadn’t seen him for weeks. In your head he had turned into an evil demon monster. Having him sitting right in front of you smiling and laughing, being the sweet and funny Hoseok you remembered, it made you ache for him like you hadn’t done for months.

“Have you ever tried the curry place down on fourth avenue?” you asked. That was the place that you would always order takeout from together.

He shook his head, “No, actually I’ve never had curry before.”

He hadn’t tried curry before the two of you met, you knew that about him. Hoseok had pretty singular tastes and didn’t really stray from what he knew, but you were too adventurous to let that fly in your relationship.

“If you’re ever around there, you should go and try it. It’s really good. I think you’d like it a lot.”

“I actually live right down the road from there. We should go together.” he offered.

“Yeah I think I’d really like that.” you said with a tiny smile.

Sooner than you’d wanted he confessed he had to leave. There was work to be done and he’d already spent a lot of time fooling around with you. The two of you had talked through most of the dinner rush. Although you felt a little guilty, you wouldn’t have changed it. It worked out well anyway because almost as soon as Hoseok was gone Minhyuk had come over, ready to talk. He walked you around the corner, passed the bathrooms. There was a small room with what looked like a lot of backstock for the bar. Kegs of beer, crates of wine. Minhyuk emptied one of the crates and flipped it over, offering it to you as a place to sit.  

“He doesn’t remember anything.” you said quietly, your eyes welled up with tears instantly, the weight of it finally sinking in now that Hoseok wasn’t around to distract you.  “He doesn’t remember us at all.”

“It’s not just you.” Minhyuk said stuffing his hands in his pockets, “It’s really everything. He doesn’t remember his mom's passing. His brother’s wedding. Most days he struggles with the code to his apartment and there have been days when he couldn’t even find the apartment itself. I can’t express how hard this has been.”

“So what, you have to like babysit him?” you asked, “Does he really forget everything, everyday, like in the movies.”

“Basically. I was the only one who could really afford to pick up and leave everything else to be here for him. He was in a coma for almost seven months. I immediately took over the restaurant for him while he was out. When he woke up with the memory loss, I stuck around. He doesn’t question me being here because I actually worked with him when he first opened. Which is about where he is in his timeline, memory wise.” Minhyuk let out an exasperated sigh, “He’s mostly fully functioning now, but he does get confused. He picks up on little things here and there. Usually the more repetitive it is the better he is at remembering. Being back at work really helped. He’s been good at remembering small tasks and it’s stirred up some progress but he’s been at a bit of a standstill lately. The problem with just doing the same things over and over is there’s nothing new challenging him or stimulating his memory. ”

“How long will he be like this? Forever? Why did he regress so far back? Is that common?”

Minhyuk shook his head, “No, the doctor doesn’t think it’ll be forever, but there’s no real timeline. They don’t know why he went back so far, maybe the extent of the damage. Most people only forget until just before the accident. He, his doctor, said that a trigger would be helpful in getting him back but we hadn’t really been sure what that could be. That’s actually why I asked you to come back.”

Pushing himself off of the shelf he’d been leaning on, Minhyuk pulled a phone from his back pocket. The screen was cracked to hell and there were scratches covering every inch. Hoseok’s old phone.

He handed it to you. “You’re the only one he talked to consistently that wasn’t me or his brother. He knew both of us before that six year mark so we don’t really trigger anything new for him. We were thinking...you might be what he needs.”

“We?” you asked absentmindedly scrolling through his phone.

He’d had dozens of conversations but most of them were with vendors for the restaurant or employees requesting time off or reporting an absence.You’d always kind of thought he worked too hard, but you didn’t realize the extent of it. You didn’t realize that he didn’t have anything in his life outside of work, except you. The conversation at the top was yours. He had you in his phone as Yeosin, which you’d never known. The last message was from you to him.

If I ever see your face again, Hoseok, it’ll be too soon.

You gulped, ashamed and embarrassed at how hateful you sounded in your last messages to him. For weeks after the accident, when you thought he’d just been ghosting you. You looked up at Minhyuk ready to explain. To apologize and swear up and down that you weren’t this person.

He shrugged, “You didn’t know.”

Next you scrolled through his photos. It felt a little like an invasion of privacy but you couldn’t help yourself. It was like learning parts of him he’d kept from you before and it was fascinating. You saw his brother at different holidays and special events. A fractured timeline of his niece through the years, from infant to toddler. Pictures of things for the restaurant like invoices, inventory, and what were probably pictures for insurance.

What surprised you was that most of his pictures were of you. Hoseok didn’t do social media, he didn’t really have time. He didn’t even run the media pages for the restaurant, he’d hired someone for that. That meant you’d never gotten to see all the pictures he’d taken of you, or realized just how many the two of you had together. Out to dinner, at different events, at home. There were cute ones, silly ones, sexy ones. An entire history of your relationship. You didn't realize you were crying until tears were splashing down on the cracked screen. You wondered if you had meant more to him than you realized and he’d just never told you. Then again it wasn’t like you’d ever told him what he meant to you either. Suddenly, you were incredibly worried you would never get the chance to know for sure.

“Um, we?” you asked again wiping your face clean and handing him back the phone.

“His brother, me, the doctor.” he said, “We would have tried to get ahold of you right when it happened, but we didn’t even know about the phone until he woke up. It had been lodged in the car, they put in a box with all the other stuff they salvaged. We hadn’t even thought to open it until we realized we needed to trigger his memory. By that time...”

You let out a small laugh, “I had changed my number. I’m so sorry. Have you tried just showing him the phone?”

“Yeah, a couple times. He just got weird and cried a lot. It didn’t really help.” he shrugged, “We think you could help though. You knew him the best during the last few years. I, we, really think you could be what brings him back.”

Thinking about the man outside this room with his beautiful smile and lingering gaze, you knew there was only one option. You looked up at Minhyuk and nodded, “What can I do? I’ll do anything.”

~~~~

It was simple really. All you were asked to do was come around and see him. Come see him and let him see you. That’s what you did and you did it often. Four times a week that first month. At first it was going to the restaurant, hanging out at the bar or eating a meal alone, waiting to see if he would notice you. He did, every time without fail, notice you. Each time he would come over to where you were and confidently make a pass at you. He would offer to comp your meals and buy you drinks. Several times he’d asked for your number. You’d have to tell Minhyuk so he could go back later and delete it, knowing it would be tough to explain why you were in his phone already the next time he asked you for it.

After weeks had gone by and you’d reintroduced yourself to Hoseok for the twentieth time, you and Minhyuk decided you needed to try something else. The two of you started manufacturing casual run-ins. He’d find out where Hoseok was going to be or ask him to come out with him somewhere and tell you where to go. Grocery stores were easy locations and so were coffee shops. You’d always get a little nervous because it was so uncertain how he’d react. The restaurant was more controlled and he was always so confident there. When he saw you anywhere else he seemed almost shy and would really work for it. It was so brand new to you to see him struggle a little.

At the grocery store he’d follow behind you for awhile, gathering courage. Usually if you stood for a while pretending to read the backs of boxes he’d make his way over, pretending to need something in front of you as a way to break the ice. Coffee shops usually meant him sitting somewhere in your line of sight. He’d make big movements to try and catch your attention. Pushing out his chest, stretching out his arms, subtle flexing that left you biting your lip to keep from laughing at how ridiculous of a flirt he was. He’d test the waters by matching your gaze over the tops of his glasses until you were blushing and flustered. Then he’d come over to your table and sit down with a pleased smile offering to refresh your drink.

Everytime, no matter where you were, like a moth to a flame he would find you. At first it was the best feeling in the world. It warmed you every time he’d find you. Everytime you were in a room full of people and the first thing he noticed was you. Everytime he would find a new way to get your attention, introduce himself to you, and flirt with you made you fall a little bit more for him. Then, slowly, it became the worst feeling. It was bitter for you because even though there was clearly something there, you were stuck. You were falling deeper in love with him than you’d ever been with anyone else. You learned and relearned every part of him, and all he ever wanted was your name. It got harder and harder for you to “meet” him, feeling so hopeless, knowing it was all for nothing. Desperate for a break you’d been avoiding messages and calls from Minhyuk for days.

Too frustrated by everything you just wanted a step back. A moment of your life where Hoseok’s face wasn’t the only thing you saw or the only thing you thought about. Work was turning out to be a decent distraction for that. Especially as there was a big opening at the art gallery you worked for in the upcoming weeks that you were busy preparing for. You were actually on the phone with the caterers for the event when you heard the chime of the door opening.

“I told Bianca when we spoke last week that it was eight hundred. Minimum.” you said calmly looking up from your paperwork to the visitor. You placed your hand over the mouth of the phone before saying “I’ll be with you in just a moment.”

Everything stopped as you caught sight of him. He may have had his back to you but that didn’t change the fact that you knew it was him. There was a black beanie pulled over his hair and his ears and he was wearing a leather jacket over a pair of light jeans. There was no reason for you to know it was him from where you were positioned but you did with one hundred percent certainty. You sunk down behind the front desk and took several deep breaths. There had been no plans made with Minhyuk for this, you didn’t even remember telling him where you worked. He had never once told you to expect this.

“Ma’am, hello?” you could hear the woman from the catering company on the phone, “Are you still there?”

“Oh my god,” you hissed into the receiver, “can you please give me a minute. I need a minute.”

You grabbed your cellphone off the desk and pulled it into your lap bringing up the conversation you had with Minhyuk.

You 1:15 pm: Are you here?

It took a minute for you to see the bubble pop up with its three little dots. Or it might have been seconds, but time got strange when you weren’t functioning properly.

Min 1:16 pm: ...where?

You 1:16 pm: At my work.

You 1:16 pm: Min

You 1:16 pm: Did you send him here?

You 1:16 pm: How do you know where I work?

You 1:16 pm: Min

You 1:17 pm: Min

You 1:17 pm: EXPLAIN PLEASE

Min 1:17 pm: Who

Min 1:17 pm: Wtf r u talking about??

Min 1:17 pm: I’m at the restaurant

Min 1:17 pm: haven’t heard from u in a week...

You looked up again to see that he had moved near the back of the gallery, still just observing the art. You could see now that he was wearing his tight maroon sweater under the jacket and your eyes went wide, he looked so good there was no way this wasn’t a trap.

You 1:18pm: Ho! Seok! Hoseok is at my work right now!

The bubble appeared and disappeared four different times and then…

Min 1:19pm: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

You 1:19pm: You’re a dead man Lee Minhyuk.

After the message sent you slammed your phone down on the desk and picked up the cordless phone for the gallery.

“Are you still there?” you asked hurriedly.

“Yes…”

“Okay, I’m going to have to call you back. Something super urgent came up, a fire to put out. I will call you back as soon as I can.” the woman on the other end sounded upset but you didn’t have the time to concern yourself with it.

You stood up and smoothed out your skirt before inconspicuously slipping back into the heels you’d kicked off under the desk. After several deep breaths you walked over to where he was standing. He’d been looking at a tall, nearly ten foot tall, narrow painting that you’d had in the gallery forever. He’d seen it before. He used to come in all the time to pick you up from work or to take you to lunch. When this painting came in originally he’d looked it over for a long time and said

“You’re never going to sell this.” you blinked at the Hoseok standing in front of you now, a sincere wave of deja vu crashing over you. He looked over at you and smiled, “I mean, not that I think you’re a bad salesperson it’s just who has the kind of space for it?”

It took an excruciatingly long moment for you to reply as he stood there looking at you, waiting. “Not the first time I’ve heard that. Um, unfortunately you’re not wrong. It’s been hard to move to say the least.”

“If I had somewhere to put it, I’d take it off your hands.” Not the first time you’d heard that either. He reached out his hand, “I’m Hoseok.”

“Hi Hoseok, I’m y/n. Did you need help finding something?” you asked tugging your lip between your teeth.

He shook his head, “No. I actually was just going to get lunch. I liked the way the door looked, thought I’d come inside.”

“The door… of the building?”

“Weird, right? I saw it and it just felt...familiar? Just felt like I’d been wanting to come in here for awhile, and I had the time so here I am.” he grinned. “Do you know any good places to eat around here?”

That earned him a suspicious look. He lived maybe a handful of blocks away from here and you knew his favorite ramen shop was about two streets over. “What are you hungry for?”

“What would you want? If you were going to lunch with me, what would you be hungry for?” he asked.

You crossed your arms over your chest and thought about it, “Anything I want?”

He nodded, “Anything at all.”

“Curry.” you said with a smirk waiting for a groan or a request for something else.

He made a bit of a face and then smiled, “Okay. Let’s go then.”

“What?” you asked surprised.

“Come get lunch with me.” he shrugged as if it was no big deal to ask someone you’d known for five minutes out to lunch.

“That’s bold of you. Anyway, I’m at work.” you said and looked around the empty gallery, “Alone. I can’t just leave.”

He hummed thoughtfully, “How long? How long until you’re not alone?”

“Could be hours.” you lied and looked down at your watch. Your coworker should actually have been back from her lunch twenty minutes ago.

“I’ll wait then.” he said clasping his hands behind his back and moving on to the next piece of art.

You couldn’t move, you just watched him as he walked around the gallery. Never once did he look back at you. He didn’t need to, he’d already seen the incredulous look that you’d had frozen on your face. Finally, after taking way too long to respond once again, you walked over to where he had stopped this time.

“Why would you wait that long just to have lunch with a stranger?” you asked.  

He turned to you with a small smirk on his lips, “I think you’re pretty. I also thought it was cute, the way you were trying to hide behind your desk when I came in. So I’d like to have a meal with you. Also I’ve never had curry before. I wouldn’t know the first thing about what to order, I’ll need you to come with me to tell me what’s best.”  

You scoffed, “You think you’re so charming, don’t you?”

“What, you disagree?” he laughed.

“I didn’t say that.” you blushed and looked away.

You both turned at the sound of the chime for the front door to see your coworker scurrying in. Big sunglasses on her face, big purse on her shoulder, and big phone against her ear. She had a finger raised as if to shush you before you even thought to say anything. The two of you watched her go around the desk to drop her bag off and then click clack her way to the restroom without even so much as a hello.

“Well would you look at that?” he said, “You’re not alone anymore.”

You opened your mouth to say something but thought better of it and ended up just rolling your eyes, much to his amusement. When Mina returned from the restroom she had her sunglasses on the top of her head and was just pulling her phone from her ear.

“Hey, Y/n! Soooo sorry I’m late. We had italian for lunch. I had too many bellinis and honestly the service was terrible. It’s not really even my fault I’m late.” She looked up at you finally and her eyes went wide, “Oh. My. God. Is that H-”

“Hey!” you shouted enthusiastically, “Hey, Mina. Mina...hey! Can I talk to you?”

“Sure,” she said eyeing Hoseok as you hurried over to the desk where she was standing. When you arrived she leaned in and said, “That is Hoseok, right?”

“Yes,” you said quietly.

“I can’t really blame you for going back to him, he looks…” she ran her tongue across her lip as she looked over at him. “So good.”

You sighed, “We’re going to go to lunch, so I’ll be gone for a little bit.”

She raised a dramatic eyebrow. “Oh, you think you’ll be coming back to work after. That’s so cute.”

“Mina! Please, it’s just lunch.”

“Just lunch...with that man? I don’t think so, y/n.” she said waving over at Hoseok and he nodded kindly in return, “Yeah, leave your panties here, you won’t be needing them where he’s taking you.”

“Anyway…” you said and grabbed your purse off of the desk, “I’ll be back. Hoseok, let’s go.”

He hurried to the front where you were and went to open the door for you.

“I won’t hold my breath!” Mina called in a song song as you made your way outside.

Lunch with Hoseok had been amazing. At several points you’d questioned why you had ever wanted space from him in the first place. You also realized you’d gotten so good at feigning interest in the things he’d repeatedly told you about himself as first meeting banter. The best part by far had been something new. It had been ordering Hoseok his favorite dish from the restaurant and watching his face explode in delight at the very first bite. He made you laugh so hard your cheeks ached and the two of you ate so much you thought you’d never have to eat again as long as you lived.

Afterwards he asked if you wanted to take a walk with him or if you had to go back to work right away. You didn’t want to prove Mina wrong so you sent her a quick message to let her know you wouldn’t be back that afternoon. You also found a message from Minhyuk swearing he had nothing to do with it, which you ignored. Hoseok walked the two of you down the street to the park that was across from his apartment building. You walked and talked down the bike path and around the small duck pond and then back up again. Finally you begged for the chance to sit down.

Your work heels weren’t meant for leisurely strolls, and you’d become worried they were filling with blood. Though truth be told, if he’d wanted to you would have kept walking for miles, but you were grateful that you didn’t have to. You were grateful he had found an unoccupied bench for the two of you to share. You sat there for some time, at one point the wind picked up and he threw his jacket over your shoulders to make sure you were comfortable enough to stay with him a little longer.  

“I’m really glad I walked into your work today.” he said moving a few stray hairs away from your face. The lights in the park started to turn on as the sun neared setting.

“Me too.” you agreed watching his tongue brush over his lips. This, you’d thought to yourself, would be a good moment for him to kiss you. If he didn’t you imagined you might scream out of frustration.

The two of you sat there for a little while longer, just watching each other. It didn’t have quite the intensity of his staring game, but it still left knots in your stomach. Your whole body was vibrating as you caught him eyeing your mouth. He gulped lightly and it felt like this was it. So you sat still as a statue as he leaned in, worried you might scare him off if you made any sudden movements. He was so close, nose brushing lightly against yours close. Then he pulled away.

“I’m so sorry.” he shook his head, “I don’t know why I did that. We just met, that was really out of line. I apologize.”

You sat quietly for a minute. All of your sexual frustration threatening to boil over. Little white bubbles stacking up beyond your capacity, staying put by nothing more than the grace of god. Looking at his face you knew you couldn’t yell at him, despite the urge to that was tugging at your chest. It wasn’t his fault, he didn’t know, but this wasn’t your fault either. It wasn’t fair for anyone.  

“I can’t do this anymore.” you sighed and stood up, “I can’t.”

“Are you okay? What’s wrong?”

“I just can’t, Hoseok. I’m so sorry.” you said through trembling lips as you pulled his jacket off your shoulders.

He took the jacket from you reluctantly, “It was a mistake, I won’t try it again. We don’t have to do anything, I promise I didn’t expect anything from you. I just wanted to spend time with you.”

“That’s the problem!” you groaned in frustration, he probably already thought you were crazy. You thought you might as well get it all out so he could go to bed and forget any of it happened. “I know it’s not your fault, but you can’t possibly understand how hard it is for me to be falling so desperately in love with a man that never remembers who I am! I don’t get to kiss you or touch you like I want, like I was used to. Every day it’s like you’re meeting me for the first time and you would never want to spend time with a girl that desperate that she begs for your physical attention after the first five minutes of meeting her.”

“I…” it was clear he was already confused by everything you were saying but it was too late, you just had to get it out.

“No, I’m not done.” you said lifting your finger, “Because now it’s so much more than that. It’s more than kissing you and holding you. It’s the inside jokes that you’re on the outside of. It’s the memories that you can’t remember and feeling like maybe I made all of it up. Maybe I made us up. Worst of all...worst of all, it’s knowing in the back of my mind that maybe before all of this you could have fallen in love with me too. I could have made you love me and now I can’t even get you to remember me.”

“I don’t...I don’t know what to say.”

“No, I know. I know.” you sniffed and smiled weakly, “I’m going to kiss you. Is that okay?”

He didn’t know why it felt right but he nodded, “Yeah.”

You grabbed his face in your hands and pulled his mouth to yours. It felt so good to have his soft, full lips against yours. He pulled you close, letting you sink into his chest. It was bittersweet. Kissing him again was exactly what you remembered it could be, but that only reminded you how much it hurt to not have it all the time. You left a quick peck of a kiss and pulled back.

“I’m gonna leave. Um, I’ll call Minhyuk and let him know.” You ran your hand over his chest with a sigh, “I’m really, I’m really sorry I wasn’t...strong enough for this. I hope you get to remember.”

“Minhyuk?” he asked still dazed and very much confused, “You know Minhyuk?”

“Yeah, you should call him. He can explain everything.” you grabbed your purse off the bench and slipped on your shoes. Hoseok didn’t know what else to do but stand there and watch you. Everything you had confessed, the kiss, and his feelings on all of it still processing very slowly. When you were ready you leaned up one last time and kissed his cheek, “I really do love you, Hoseok. I wish you could remember that.”

~~~

It was lucky for you that it was the start of your weekend because when you got home and sunk into your pajamas you knew that you’d have been useless if you were forced to try doing anything beyond laying in bed watching sappy romance movies and eating ice cream a gallon at a time. You called Minhyuk to try and explain why you couldn’t do it anymore through hefty sobs but he wasn’t understanding anything you said. You ended up just texting him something of an essay that didn’t make much more sense than your verbal ramblings but you’d figured you’d tried your best and it’s all you could do.

It made you incredibly frustrated, mad, and just generally upset that you had to get over Hoseok for a second time. Part of you wished you’d never seen him again, that you didn’t know about the accident. That you hadn’t spent the last couple of months fruitlessly trying to help him get his memory back. Mostly you just wished that he would come back to you.

Sunday morning you woke up fairly early. You showered and got ready for the day like a normal human being, and made your way down the street to the grocery store. The pretense was that you were going to pick up some vegetables and fruit, something sustainable. Part of you knew all along that you were just going to get more ice cream. As you walked up the sidewalk to your apartment building you saw a familiar face. You shifted your bag of groceries in your arm as you watched Hoseok, wondering what he was doing there.

“Seriously, Minhyuk…” you muttered under your breath.

Hoseok looked completely lost, just slowly spinning around in a circle like he was looking for something specific. As you got closer to him, he stopped. You could see his Adam’s apple bob in his throat with a gulp and you wondered for the briefest moment if maybe he remembered you, if you were the something specific he’d been looking for. You kept his gaze, half expecting him to say something to you. Instead his cheeks grew a shy blush and he looked away as you passed him. Maybe not. The fact that he didn’t say anything to you only made you more curious as to why he was there if it really wasn’t for you. You walked up the few steps of the stoop and tried to juggle your groceries as you dug into your purse for your keys.

“Do you need some help?”

Even though you knew he was there, his voice still took you by surprise. You looked over your shoulder and smiled, “No, thanks. I got it.”

“Okay.” He smiled back lightly and shoved his hands in his pockets before walking down the sidewalk a little ways.

Once you got yourself inside you stopped to grab your mail. You could still see him from your mailbox, wandering around aimlessly. He looked like a sad, lost puppy and all the frustration you’d felt start to dissipate yet again. You let out a long deep sigh as you realized that it was never going to be over for you, not when it came to him.

Leaving your groceries on the shelf in front of the mailboxes you walked over to the door and pushed it open. “Do you need help with something?”

Hoseok spun around with a bright smile on his face. “I don’t know.”

Your eyebrows knit together in confusion. “What?”

“Um…” he looked around the street once more and then jogged the short way to your stoop. “I don’t know what I’m doing here. You ever get the feeling you’re supposed to be somewhere but once you get there you’re not sure what you’re there for?”

“Literally never...done that” You laughed.

“I know it sounds crazy.” He shook his head and looked back up at you, meeting your gaze but this time with more confidence. “I woke up this morning and I knew that I had to be here, that it was important that I come here.”

You gulped, “Like right here, to this spot?”

“I didn’t know, not it first. It was more general. I’ve been walking around this neighborhood all morning and then when I got to this street I just knew I was close and then I got to that light post over there and...can’t figure out where I’m supposed to go. But I know this is approximately where I need to be. I haven’t been able to figure out why. It feels familiar but nothing looks familiar. Does that make sense?”

“Why did you feel like you needed to come here?” You asked leaning against the doorframe.

His smile faltered slightly. “I felt bad, I think. Guilty maybe, like I needed to make something right. My heads been weird lately. I thought I’d know when I got here.”

“Well…” you sighed, had he really come all this way to make up with you without even knowing it? Or were you just reading too far into it? “If you’ve been outside all morning you should come in for awhile and warm up. You don’t want to get sick. I can make you some tea.”

“Really?” He asked, looking thrilled at the idea, “You’d do that for a stranger?”

You let out a small laugh, “Yeah...I’d do that for a stranger. Come on, I’m letting all the hot air out.”

“Thank you. Thank you so much.” he said slipping inside of the building. He watched as you got your mail, you’d been too distracted by him to do it before. Then he snatched up your bag of groceries before you could, “I’ll carry them. It’s the least I could do.”

“I guess, if you really want to.” you grinned walking over to the stairs.

“I’m Hoseok, by the way.”

You let out a little hum and nodded, “Nice to meet you, Hoseok. I’m y/n.”

Inside your apartment you brought the groceries to the kitchen and told Hoseok to make himself at home as you started the water for the tea. As you waited for the water to heat up you peeked around the corner of the kitchen and watched him as he scoped out your living room. He looked cozy in his old, oversized, black hoodie and a pair of gray sweatpants. You let yourself imagine, just for a moment, how nice it would be to get back into your pajamas and curl up on the couch with him. Luckily the whistle of your tea kettle woke you from your fantasy and you slipped back into the kitchen.

When you came back into the living room with the tea he was sitting in front of your record collection, flipping through the old vinyls. He looked up at you with a smile, “This is really cool.”

You handed him one of the cups and sat down on the floor with him, “It was mostly inheritance from my dad. I’ve picked up a handful here and there, but it was mostly his thing.”

“Can I put something on?” he asked hopefully.

“Sure.” you shrugged and while he flipped through the records you crawled over to the couch and started tossing throw pillows onto the floor in front of the record player.

After you crawled back over you laid on your back with your head on one of the pillows and closed your eyes. You weren’t entirely surprised when the first song started to play. It was one he’d played often when he came over to your place before. A well worn compilation of vintage soul songs, it had been your dads favorite record too. Hoseok laid down on his stomach, tucking a pillow under his chest, and held the tea you’d made in his hands.

When you opened your eyes he was looking down at you with a curious smile, “Is this okay?”

“This is really nice. I like it.” you nodded.

You watched him for awhile as he bobbed his head and moved his shoulders to the beat of the songs, taking sips every now and then of the tea in his hands. He looked happy and content. You thought to ask him what he was thinking about but didn’t want to bother him. When he was warm from the tea he moved his pillow so that he could rest his head on it. Then you watched each other quietly as the music played in the background.  

“Did you ever figure out what you came here for?” you asked.

He smiled shyly and turned his face into the pillow for a second before looking back at you, “Yeah, I think I did.”  

~~~

Minhyuk smirked when he saw you walk into the bar that evening. Without offering you a greeting he started making your usual drink as you found a seat.

“I see you changed your mind.” He said sliding the glass in front of you. “That didn’t last long at all.”

You gulped down a mouthful of the drink and placed your glass back on the bar. “Don’t boast, it doesn’t suit you.”

“What changed your mind?” He asked leaning against the bar top.

“Hoseok.” You answered simply.

“Speaking of, he’s not here tonight. He’s off today.”

“Yeah, I know. I saw him earlier. We spent a couple of hours together.” You cleared your throat, “That’s why I’m here to see you, we need to talk. Something is changing with him.”

“Something good or something bad?”

“Good. I think.” You said, “He came to me today.”

“He usually does make the first move.”

“No, he found me. I didn’t seek him out or make myself available to him somewhere. I got home from the store and he was standing in front of my apartment. He had no idea why he was there, but he came to me. If you really didn’t send him to my work like you say you didn’t, that means it’s the second time this week he’s done that.”

“Hold that thought.” he said and moved down the bar to the customer that had just sat down.

You wondered what it meant, if it was possible it meant that he was getting more memories back. How could he have known where to go if it weren’t for some subconscious memory trying to make its way to the surface. If that was the case then it meant there was finally a sliver of hope that you could hang onto and that’s all you’d really needed all along. A vision of a light at the end of the tunnel.

“Okay.” Minhyuk said sliding back over to you, “I want to get into the Hoseok thing, that’s important, but I also need you to clarify what the hell you were talking about the other day when you said you were done. Can you tell me now without crying? Hoseok seemed to think you were, I don’t know, the way he described it just sounded like you were horny, to be honest.”

Your cheeks burned red as he smirked at you. “No… that’s not… not exactly. I mean, okay, yes. I am… horny or whatever, but it was more than that. It is more than that. I have feelings for him and he can’t have feelings for me because he can’t even remember me. And yes, sometimes I want to kiss him and more-”

Minhyuk snorted, “Kiss him and more. Are you five?”

“Shut up.” you rolled your eyes, “I want more from him but everyday is the first day we’ve met for him and there’s no good way to try sleep with someone an hour after you’ve met.”

“You’ve spent all this time with him and never asked him to smash?”

“No!” you gasped, mortified, “Total time, yes we’ve spent a lifetime together, but he doesn’t know that. From his point of view every time we meet it’s the first time and it’s only for like three or four hours max. No one is just going to ask a stranger to have sex with them a few hours after they’ve met.”

He scoffed, fully amused at your assumption. “Uhhh, false. Guys will. Guys will have sex with women within minutes of meeting them.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“Men are disgusting and I’m a man, so you’re not wrong.” he shrugged and leaned against the bar. He knocked his knuckles against the wood rhythmically as he thought. “How many dates did you go on before you guys originally hooked up?”

“Well,” you flushed slightly. “It was...the first...date.”

He raised his eyebrows at you, “Then what’s the issue? Just make a move already.”

“It was different that day!” you argued. “We met early in the morning and ended up spending all day together. We were with each other for over twelve hours by the time we got to his place. So it was like we’d gone on three dates, just all at one time”

“Okay, then just do that again.” he said as if it was the obvious answer, “It’s not like we haven’t fabricated all of your other dates.”

“This one we can’t. The day we met we were both going to a festival. That’s why it worked out the way it did. It’s not like there are festivals happening all day everyday just because I need one.“

“Festival?” Minhyuk asked looking suspicious. “What kind of festival was this?”

“Just a music festival down by River Park.”

“Bullshit,” he laughed, “Hoseok would never go to a music festival. He hates that crap. He doesn’t even like to go to regular concerts. He thinks they’re a waste of time and money.”

“Well I don’t know what to tell you. He was there with me all day.”

“Who mentioned this festival first, you or him?” he asked, clearly not letting it go.

“I don’t know, it was like four years ago!” you said shaking your head, but then you realized you did remember. “It was me. I was wearing  some dumb outfit and he said ‘looks like you’re going somewhere fun’ and I told him about the festival, it’s how we started talking actually.”

“Hoseok, you sly dog.” Minhyuk grinned, “I’d bet a million and a half dollars he didn’t even know about the festival until he met you.”

You shook your head in denial, “He had a ticket.”

“A ticket he could have purchased online, day of the event, using his phone?” your face scrunched in confusion. “It didn’t seem weird to you that he was going alone or not meeting anyone there?”

“Not at all, because I was going to go by myself before I met him that day.”

Minhyuk stopped and looked at you for a long while. It was like he was looking at you for the first time. You squirmed uncomfortably under his lingering gaze. You reached over the bar and grabbed an olive before throwing it at him. “Oh my god, what?

“I can’t believe it took me so long to realise it. It’s so clear, everything makes so much more sense now.”

“What is clear? Make your weird little brain make sense to me!” you complained.

“Hoseok was in love with you from day fucking one.” he chuckled to himself, “It’s why he always finds you. Subconsciously he has to remember. I knew, I knew all we needed was you. We just have to figure out what to do with it.”

“In love with me? Are you kidding? We weren’t even dating.”

“You went to dinner together. You watched movies together. You went to festivals together. You made him dinner and he bought you birthday presents. Oh, and you had sex regularly...What the hell do you call that?”

“Nothing!” you argued, “We didn’t call it anything. That was the point. We didn’t have time for dating and feelings. We were just friends with benefits.”

“Well.” Minhyuk sighed, “We learned two things today. One piece of good news, one piece of bad news.

“Yeah, what’s that?” you asked taking a drink.

“Bad news is you’re a totally useless idiot. Good news is I wasn’t the last one on earth to figure out you two were in fact dating and also in love with each other.”

You rolled your eyes yet again, your favorite thing to do when Minhyuk was around really, “You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Get your head in the game, y/n!” he said reaching over the bar and dramatically strangling the the air in front of your neck, “He’s in love with you, you’re in love with him. Let’s figure out how to fix this mess!”

~~~

Your hands were shaking as you stood in line for coffee at your favorite cafe. It had taken Minhyuk all of ten minutes to come up with a plan and even though you weren’t sure it was going to work you also didn’t have any better ideas. It also wouldn’t hurt to try considering Hoseok would just forget by tomorrow if everything went to hell. He was standing in line ahead of you getting his coffee, his phone pressed between his shoulder and his ear. You said a silent prayer as he thanked the barista and turned around to leave.

“I’m literally right across the street. It doesn’t make sense for me to not come in today.” He was still on the phone, with who you knew was Minhyuk. As he got closer you took a deep breath and stepped to the side just a few inches. His shoulder crashed into yours. There was the sound of a splash and then he said, “Shit, Min. I gotta go.”

You turned towards him and touched his forearm lightly, “Oh my god, are you okay? I’m so sorry!”

He looked from your hand to your face where he stared for quite some time, just blinking at you. “No. Yeah! I’m fine, did I get you with my coffee?”

“Um,” you looked down at your outfit, “My shoes a little but that’s okay. I’m really sorry.”

“Please,” he shook his head, “It was entirely my fault. I was on my phone, not paying attention.”

“Even still, please let me get you another coffee. Do you have a minute to wait with me?”

Hoseok looked down at the phone in his hand, Minhyuk had said not to come in today, that he wasn’t needed. Looking back up at you he smiled, “Yeah. I have all day actually.”

“Awesome!” You beamed, “I’m going to go get something to clean this up with. Stay here for just a minute, save our place in line?”

“Of course.”

You let out a deep breath you didn’t realize you’d been holding as you stepped away. Phase one of Minhyuk’s plan was right on track.

According to Minhyuk phase one was equal to the first date. A “meet cute at the coffee shop” he’d called it. You were impressed at how everything had happened exactly like he said it would. After the mess was cleaned up and you bought Hoseok his new coffee you asked if he’d wanted to sit with you awhile and he was thrilled by the idea. Four hours of effortless conversation passed. Part of you didn’t even want to move on to phase two, you’d been so happy with how phase one was turning out. Even if you would have been fine joking around and laughing with him in that cafe for four more hours, you moved on with the plan.

Phase two, or date two, was the fall festival down at the park where the original music festival had been. Minhyuk had found out about it after thirty seconds of googling and made a terrible joke about how you’d been wrong when you said there weren’t festivals whenever you needed them. It wasn’t the same exact thing as your first first date, but it could still be a lot of fun if he agreed to it.  You asked Hoseok if he’d heard about the festival and when he said no you asked, ‘even though you’d just met’, if he wanted to go check it out with you. He agreed immediately and the two of you walked down to River Park. A true gentleman, he bought your entrance ticket but you only let him do it after he promised to let you buy him a corndog.

For hours you walked around the festival. You did some people watching, lots of judging and even more laughing. You got on some sketchy looking festival rides and felt grateful every time you walked off of them in one piece. And you ate way too much fried food. Your latest culinary decision had been a pumpkin spice funnel cake and a hot chocolate. Hoseok drank hot apple cider while eating his second corndog of the day. His was a combination you couldn’t get behind entirely, but he seemed to be enjoying it and you loved to see the smile on his face.  

As the two of you walked down the midway you tore a piece of your funnel cake and held it up to his mouth, “So good, try it.”

You bit your lip as he leaned forward and wrapped his lips around your fingers before sucking the treat into his mouth. He hummed as you pulled your hand away, “There’s so much delicious, horrible food here and I must eat it all. Why?”

“I don’t know,” you laughed, taking another bite, “Isn’t it the best?”

“Oh! Oh! Oh!” he pointed enthusiastically across the way from where you were standing to one of those balloon and dart games. “There. We have to go over there.”

You groaned, “Those are just money traps. Let’s go to the fun house!”

“After.” he said grabbing your wrist and pulling you across the crowded midway with determination.

Very politely he asked you to hold his apple cider and you obliged. He shoved the rest of his corndog in his mouth, and was standing with it bulging from his cheek as he dug out his wallet. You watched as he exchanged his cash for three darts. In a manner that was all too serious for you he took his stance. His tongue was sticking out of the side of his mouth as he eyed one of the balloons. One out of three balloons had popped, winning him a tiny plastic toy. Apparently that wasn’t what he wanted because he pulled out more cash from his wallet and exchanged it for more darts.  

It was clear after sometime that you were not going to be leaving that game until he got whatever it was he was after. In the time it was taking you finished your funnel cake and neither of you had a drink left. You’d even left at one point to find a trash, found a clown making balloon animals and purchased a balloon crown. When you finally came back he was still going and you put the crown on his head and told him it was good luck. There was a growing pile in front of him of very cheaply made, small and medium toys. Things were getting tense as he was down to his last few bills.

“What are you even after?” you asked curiously as he received another bunch of darts.

“You’ll see.” he took his first shot, the dart bursting through a red latex balloon. He got the second one too, blue balloon bits exploding with a pop! With a contemplative sigh he looked over at you and asked very seriously, “Yellow or green?”

“Green.” you answered quickly and confidently.

He focused ahead and took a deep breath before throwing the last dart. The point of the dart blasted through the green latex balloon and you couldn’t help but scream out in excitement. You laughed as Hoseok turned and lifted you off the ground to spin you around.

“You did it!” you exclaimed as he put you back down.

“Great,” the carny said with much less enthusiasm. “Toad or bunny?”

“Bunny.” He smiled, leaving his arm around your hip as he waited for his prize.

Both of you watched as the carny grabbed his long hooked stick and hoisted it into the mess of stuffed toads and bunnies above his head. He gave it a little jiggle and the huge bunny in his little velvet vest with his tiny bowtie tumbled from the sky.

“All of this because you wanted a bunny?” You asked shaking your head.

“No.” He handed you the bunny and smiled, “I don’t need a bunny, I am a bunny. The bunny is for you so can take him home and think of me when you see him.”

Your mouth fell in awe and amusement. He was such an incredible flirt and you weren’t sure when you’d started taking that for granted. Giving the bunny a tight squeeze you remembered that he had in fact told you he was a bunny when you’d first met and that he’d said to be gentle with him. At the time you’d thought he was just joking, but you’d been learning more and more that despite his manly physique he was the softest, sweetest man you’d ever met.  

“You’re keeping all of them?” You asked genuinely surprised as he scooped up the whole stack of smaller prizes in his arm.”

“No, not keeping them, but I did pay for them”  he looked over at you and smiled, pleased by the way you were holding onto the stuffed bunny. “Fun house?”

As you made your way down the midway once more, headed towards the fun house, you watched him as he passed out his stack of prizes to kids he saw along the way until his arms were empty. When that was done he threw his freed arm over your shoulder and you blushed into your fluffy, oversized gift. Phase two - second date, was going flawlessly.

~~~

With your arms wrapped tightly around your bunny you stood face to face with Hoseok in front of the exit gates of the festival. People were swarming around you as they tried to leave. Broke teenage couples that spent too much money cheap trinkets and rides all day, parents with pink cheeked toddlers crashed out against their shoulders. You tugged your lip between your teeth, it was time to initiate phase three - date three.

“So…” you said slowly, this was the one you were least certain he’d agree to.  “I know it’s late and we’ve already spent all day together. You’re probably tired of me and want to go home but...my friend is spinning at a club a few blocks away. If you’re at all interested in spending even more time with me, I can get us in. No wait, no cover, maybe free drinks?”

“Ummm.” you were trembling, so nervous he was going to say no. “I was actually trying to think of an excuse to spend more time with you myself, so I would love to go.”

“Oh.” you sighed with relief. You felt warm all over despite the chill of the fall air. “Well, good.”

Before the two of you even got passed the gates he’d scooped up your hand in his and you led him the few blocks to the busy club. There was a line that wrapped around the corner of the building of people waiting to get into the club, but you dragged Hoseok, and Bunho, who Hoseok had named for you, to the front of the line. You dropped your name and were let in without a seconds worth of waiting. You could still hear the groans of the line outside as you walked into the building.

Inside the club was packed from wall to wall. You squeezed Hoseok’s hand as you led him to the DJ booth, laughing to yourself as people stared at the giant stuffed bunny in your arms. In the booth you were greeted by your old friend Hyungwon. He’d met Hoseok before plenty of times but you weren’t worried about him remembering as he met hundreds of people a night and was usually already tipsy before his sets even started. If you didn’t meet him outside of a club he was never going to remember you. After giving Hoseok a friendly handshake, Hyungwon wrapped his arms around you in a tight hug as a greeting and told you how happy he was you could make it. He handed over two neon green wristbands that were good for free drinks at the bar, and he promised to take care of Bunho in the booth while you had fun.

“Will you dance with me?” You asked against Hoseok's ear  once you were on the crowded dance floor.

He looked so tense, but he nodded in agreement anyway. You tried several different moves in an attempt to get him to loosen up but you could tell he wasn’t feeling it yet.

Remembering the wristbands you put one in his wrist and the other on yours before shoving him to the bar. There the two of you indulged in several shots of top shelf tequila and a couple of mixed drinks. Within no time at all you both were in the best of spirits and you couldn’t shake the urge you had to dance. You asked again if he wanted to dance and this time he nodded enthusiastically

He held your hips as you both made your way back to the dance floor. It was a tight fit all around but you found a decent spot near the back where there was actually enough space to move. His cheeks and the tips of his ears were pink from the alcohol as he danced with you in the crowded club. You were glad he’d finally loosened up and seemed to be having fun.

You danced for what felt like hours and you wanted nothing more than to keep going. The pair of you jumped around, arms flailing recklessly through the air. He grabbed your hand and twirled you around under his arm several times.

Then he spun you out and pulled you back into his arms. Your heart was pounding in your chest, your chest pressed against his. Both of you were short of breath. Everyone around you kept dancing while he held you close. Not moving, not speaking, barely breathing. Your fingers curled into the fabric of his shirt and you leaned in just slightly, testing the waters. He leaned towards you, until your sweaty foreheads were pressed together. Your eyes hadn’t left his lips, but you were hesitating and you were sure why.

“Are you gonna kiss me or what?” He grinned.

That was the invitation you’d apparently needed. Pulling on his shirt you tugged him that half an inch closer until your lips were pressed together. You smiled against his mouth. Really pressing yourself into him, you lifted your hands from his chest to his hair. His tongue brushed against your mouth and you let him in. You tried not to cry as you thought about how this was happening. Not some sad pity kiss in the park. A kiss you both wanted and were clearly enjoying. It felt so damn good. One of his hands slid up your back and cupped the back of your neck. You thought for a moment how you’d be okay doing this and only this for the rest of your life.

That only lasted until Hoseok pulled away from your lips and leaned close to your ear to whisper, “Do you want to get out of here?”

That one single question had an implication that left fireworks going off in the pit of your stomach.

~~~

The walk back to Hoseok’s place wouldn’t have taken that long. Even still he hailed the first cab he saw once you were out on the sidewalk outside of the club, not wanting to waste any more time. He’d pulled you into his lap in the backseat where you kissed the entire ride. In the elevator ride you stood on opposite sides. He held onto the bar behind him as he smiled over at you, anxiously tapping his leg. You peeked at him from between Bunho’s big ears, squeezing the bunny close to your chest. You couldn’t help but giggle at the feeling of anticipation running through you.

Once the elevator opened Hoseok was blasting passed you through the door, gripping your wrist tightly and leading you down the long hallway. You said a silent prayer that he’d get the code right the first time and almost cheered out loud when he did. Finally inside, your purse and giant stuffed bunny were left by the wayside as he pulled your hips towards his own.

His hands slid down your ass and backs of your legs until he’d hooked his arms around your legs to pull them around his waist. You had released several moans into his mouth. The way your body was reacting to his made you feel like he might as well already be inside you. You were feverish, and aching all over for more of him. So close to the release you’d been needing.

“You gotta…” he panted, pulling away from you slightly, “stop making that noise. My jeans are already too tight for that.”

“I can't stop.” You groaned again. Your hands fisted his hair. He let out some guttural noise and pulled away again gasping for air. And you whined, “God, I fucking missed you.”

“What?”

“Nothing.” You whispered against his ear before pulling it between your teeth, the way you knew he liked. His whole body shuddered and he slammed your back against the wall for leverage to keep from dropping to his knees. You dropped your legs from his waist to give him a break and he pressed his freed palms against the wall beside your head.

“How are you real?” He questioned as he rested his head against your neck, gasping desperately for air.

“Maybe I’m not.” You panted out your own reply.

“Okay..” he sighed, “I gotta get to that bed.”

Hooking his arms around your thighs he lifted you back up around his waist. You cupped his face in your hands, sucking his swollen lips between yours fervently while he danced the two of you the rest of the way down the hall. The mattress took you by surprise when he dropped you onto it. Hoseok stayed standing. You watched, your tongue passing over your lips, as he stepped back and unbuttoned his shirt before untucking it from his jeans.

You wanted to scream with excitement at the sight. It was really happening, after months and months. First months of thinking he’d just abandoned you. And then the ones you’d spent trying to get him to remember you. It was about to happen, you were here again with him and everything felt somewhat normal. Felt like it had before, when it was you and him, and everything was good.

When you focused back on him you realized he’d gotten down to just his tight black underwear and you gulped at the defined bulge. Feeling impatient you stood up, grabbed his face in your hands, and kissed him hard. He whimpered when you drug your nails down his chest.

“Sit down.” You muttered into his lips, “It’s my turn.”

He sat on the end of the bed and watched you with a giant, beautiful smile on his lips. You pulled your shirt over your head and immediately his eyes were wide. With a little chuckle, feeling quite proud of yourself, you unbuttoned your shorts and dragged them down your legs. When you stood back up Hoseok had his hand on his chest.

“I can’t…” he looked at you with wonder, “I can’t breathe.”

“Please, I’m not that special.” You laughed, thinking he was joking.

He shook his head, “No..I...I don’t know.. I can’t-“

“Hoseok…” you stepped forward and grabbed his shoulders. He looked like he was having a legitimate panic attack. “Oh my god.”

He grasped at you with both hands pulling you forward by your hips. He pressed his cheek against your bare stomach and begged you, “Hold me. Hold-hold me, please.”

Hunching over you wrapped an arm tight around his shoulders, and with the other you massaged his head. “I’ve got you. You’re okay. Just breathe, I’m right here.”

It took a couple of  minutes for him to stop shaking, a little longer after that for his breathing to be steady, and then he was back to normal. He threw his head back and looked up at you. He looked so embarrassed, “I swear that’s never happened before.”

“Are you okay? What happened?” You asked placing a gentle palm against his flushed cheek.

“I saw you and...it’s so cheesy...I guess you just took my breath away.” He sighed, “It was something else though. I can’t explain it right, you won’t get it. I know we just met and this is the first time I’ve ever seen you like this but there was this overwhelming… it was like flashes of you, in front of me like you were but not now, not this moment. It wasn’t deja vu. It was like memories.”

You bit your lip unsure of how to handle what was happening. No one had told you what to do if his memory started to return like this. Were you supposed to explain everything to him? Risk him having another panic attack. If he had questions you weren’t sure you’d have the answers. “Should we stop?”

“God no.” He muttered, he was looking up at you with big doe eyes. “I mean, I don’t want to stop, but if I made you uncomfortable…”

You held out your hand to him and when he took it you pulled him to his feet. You planted a kiss against his lips before dropping to your knees. His eyebrows raised in pleasant surprise. As he stood before you, you tugged his black underwear from his hips, dragging them down his legs. He was already fully erect, his tip glistening.

Moving your hands back up his legs you could feel what you thought was scarring. You wondered if he even knew it was there, how often did someone look at the backs of their own legs. Trying your best to be inconspicuous you leaned in close to his hip and left a soft kiss. From that angle, looking down, you could see the scar. It looked pink and fresh, starting at his hip and following the length of his leg all the way to his ankle.

You rested your forehead against the top of his thigh, trying to keep yourself composed. Every reminder that you could have lost him for good had a bad habit of nearly breaking your heart.

His fingers traced you jaw to your chin and he lifted your face to look at his. “Are you okay? Do you want to stop?”

You shook your head and gave him a small smile, “Hoseok...you’re so beautiful.”

He tried to play it off but you could see very clearly on his face how much he appreciated the praise. You leaned back on your heels. And ran your hands down his inner thighs. He shuddered underneath your touch. Wrapping your hand around his length you leaned forward and swirled your tongue slowly around the tip. You grinned, seeing the muscles in his abdomen clench from the small action.

After one more teasing swirl, you took him into your mouth completely. Hands gripping his hips, you looked up at him through batted lashes. His breathing was tense already, and you wondered what he was thinking about as you sucked your cheeks in. You would have never guessed how desperately he was begging himself not to explode in your mouth after only a minute of your lips wrapped around him. He didn’t know why he was so sensitive, he didn’t know it had actually been a year since the last time he’d had sex.

He palmed your cheek as you bobbed back and forth along his length. Your tongue swirling around him simultaneously and you offered the perfect amount of teeth. The slightest dragging sensation that made his eyes roll back. Professional, was all he could think to himself as he gasped helplessly above you. You watched the heave of his chest, paired with the trembling if his thighs under your hands, and you knew he was close. He closed his eyes and you though for a second this was it.

Instead he pulled his hips away from you and panted out, “Stop. Wait. Fuck.”

“Are you okay?” You asked still concerned over his reaction earlier.

“Yeah I just…” he didn't know how to, or really want to, try and explain the comedic way he was imagining his orgasm would look. Feeling like he was going to blast out like a firehose, spraying your face relentlessly. You running away terrified. Him never seeing you again.

“Hoseok?”

“Just...come here.” He said with a smile and helped pull you to your feet. He kissed across your cheek and down your neck before whispering against your earlobe, “I want to taste you.”

That was a good enough reason for you. An anticipatory groan fell from your lips with such gusto that you felt embarrassed, wishing you could somehow take it back. However, Hoseok loved how much you wanted him back. With his hands on your hips he spun you around so your legs were backed against the bed. He kissed down your neck, across your collarbone and over your shoulder. His hands moving around you for just a moment before you were released from your bra.

You wanted to say something about the ease with which he removed your bra but the dark look in his eyes as he leaned back and slipped your straps from your shoulders left you incapable of saying anything at all. Your lip trapped between your teeth as he leaned forward once more to kiss and suck at the sensitive skin. His mouth left a moist trail all the way down your abdomen to the elastic band of your lace panties. His fingers hooked onto them on both sides of your hips and he tugged until you were completely naked in front of him.

“Sit.” He commanded. You did so easily, your legs bordering on the consistency of jello as it were. He knelt down in front of the edge of the bed and m propped your knees open in front of him. You were leaning back on your elbows, watching him as he dragged his fingers along your sex and smirked, “Hey, y/n…”

“What?” You asked breathlessly.

“You’re so beautiful.” Still smirking he leaned forward and buried himself in you.

Your arms fell weak and you crashed back against the bed as he worked you with his mouth. Just the swirl and dip of his tongue, and the way his lips wrapped around your clit, it was all you needed. In just minutes you were so close. And then he slipped his finger inside of you, then suddenly it was two pressing deep and curling as he pulled them out.

“Hoseok,” you gasped, “I-“

You couldn’t speak, you could barely breathe. Not much more than a mess beneath his touch. With a whimper you reached between your legs, running your fingers through his hair. Your toes curled and your back arched against the sheets. Eyes rolling back, you gushed around his fingers and onto his lips. The sound he made as he lapped up your orgasm nearly had you coming a second time.

When he was done he moved on to the bed, between your legs, crawling up your body until your lips were clashing together. You ran your hands up his back, your fingertips tracing the muscles in his shoulders. Pulling away from your lips he shuddered and leaned back in to kiss down your neck, his lips sucking greedily at your clavicle. Goosebumps raised across your skin from the gentle way he dragged his fingers over your body.

“Please,” you begged with a gulp. It was too much. He was too much.

You opened your hips beneath him as further invitation. He pushed himself up further, to get a better look at you. He ran his hand over your cheek and dipped his tongue out over his lips. His dark bangs were hanging away from his face and when he looked at you, you could have sworn he knew you. Not just knew you today, but knew you deeper than that. It was like he knew you were his. It took every ounce of self-restraint you had in your body not to tell him then and there how much you loved him.

He reached down between your legs and keeping your eyes locked with his he fitted himself against you. “You’re sure?”

“Positive.”

Your head fell back as he eased inside of you, the feeling was euphoric on a hundred different levels. His forehead pressed against your neck, and tiny grunts escaped his lips. You dug your nails into skin of his shoulders and dragged them down his back.

“God...damn” he gasped before digging his teeth into your skin.

“Over.” you said against his neck.

He rolled over on the mattress, taking you with him. You pushed yourself up, sitting back against his thighs. His hair was a mess and you were sure yours was even worse off. After some slight adjustment you sunk back down onto him and satisfied with the fill you sighed and looked down at him. As your hips rounded on him you moved your hands over his chest. The dip of his collarbones, the rise of his pecs. His hands gripped your thighs so your eyes followed his arms. Fingers to strong hands, hands to tightly flexed forearms, forearms to bulging biceps, and then just his smiling face looking up at you like you were everything.

“What?” he asked as you let out a small half laugh, half moan.

You shook your head, “Nothing, it’s so stupid.”

He moved his hands up to your hips to make sure you kept your pace as he lifted his own hips up until you were gasping from the fill. “Tell me.”

“It’s just,” you blushed from embarrassment, “you’re so sexy.”

He shook with laughter beneath you and the vibrations left you whimpering. You laughed at the sensation of it and he laughed with you.

You fell forward and giggled through tiny gasps, “Stop...laughing,”

“Why?” he asked, “It feels so good.”

“I know, but I’m gonna cum, and it’s not funny.” you groaned as he chuckled again.

“You’re right,” he said and your stomach tightened at the way he dropped the smile from his face. He moved his hand between your thighs and circled his finger against your clit, “I will take your orgasms very seriously from now on.”

“Oh. Oh my god!” your eyes blew wide as you hit your second orgasm for the night, “Hoseok, fuck!”

He squeezed his eyes shut, his nose scrunched up and he bit his lip as the pulsing from your orgasm brought him to his own. Breathless and exhausted you rested against his chest. You could have fallen asleep to the sound of his heartbeat.

~~~

That night you didn’t let yourself fall asleep next to Hoseok, even though a big part of you wanted to. The winning part of your mind couldn’t stop imagining how terrible the next morning would go when he woke up with a stranger in his bed. Especially after the breakdown he’d already had, you just weren’t sure how he’d handle it. So that night you made up some excuse about needing to be up early the next day and went home with just Bunho to keep you company. Then you did it again. Three more times. Three more day long dates with Hoseok that ended in some of the best sex you’d ever had in your life. Each time you ended up being too afraid to stay for fear of what might happen the next morning, despite the fact that every time he’d asked you to stay.

After the fifth daylong date you found yourself dozing off. You’d been laying with your head on his chest, and he was running his fingers over your bare skin. He’d been humming a song for a while, though you couldn’t figure out which one it was. All you knew was that it was soothing. Hitting that moment when you’re just about to truly fall asleep your eyes flew open.

“I really need to get out of here.” you sighed, pushing yourself up and out of his arms.

“What? No, why?” he asked grabbing your hand, “Stay with me, I don’t mind.”

“I can’t.” you looked over at him almost annoyed at how effortlessly handsome he was being. How effortlessly handsome he always was. “You won’t want me here in the morning.”

“Why? What happens in the morning?” he asked brushing your cheek with his thumb.

“Nothing, you’ll just change your mind.”

You sank back down onto the pillow next to his and looked over at him. You didn’t want to leave, and were less worried now that you were feeling wide awake. He placed his hand against your cheek. He locked eyes with you and you couldn’t look away. His face was so serious, the slightest pout on his pink lips. Your heart was beating impossibly fast.

“Stop.” you said gently, trying to match his calm energy.

“Stop what?” he asked raising a single eyebrow, looking almost innocent.

“Looking at me with your face.” he laughed and you felt yourself sink further into the bed at the sound. “Looking at me like you know my soul.”

“You think I don’t?” he asked seriously, quirking his head to the side slightly. “You don’t feel it?”

Tingles shot across every inch of your bare skin. “Feel what?”

“Feel like you’ve known me forever? I feel like I know you already.” he dropped his hand from where it had been cupping your face to your hand and squeezed your fingers, “Stay. Please?”

“Okay,” you agreed, “but only until you fall asleep and then I’m taking off.”

He smiled, pleased with himself, and moved his hand under the sheets. “Are you challenging me to an all nighter?”

“Hoseok!” you shrieked with laughter, feeling his fingers slip between your thighs. You shoved his shoulder but the action barely moved him.

“Come on.” he said leaning close, burying his nose in your neck, “Let me work you so hard you can’t even feel your legs. Then you’ll have to stay with me.”

You let out a half laugh, half groan. Laugh because of the way his breath tickled all the way down your throat, and groan from the feeling of his fingers slipping inside of you, slowly.

With a weak conviction you choked out, “You can try...I guess, but it won’t work.”

Hoseok’s stamina hadn’t been something you’d considered. His plan had worked and you fell asleep while you were still in his arms after the second round of the night.

Shocked was an understatement of how he felt the next morning as he woke up with his arms around you. For a moment he didn’t recognize you, he didn’t remember bringing anyone home or what he’d done the night before that could have lead him forgetting everything that brought him to this moment. A groan fell from your lips as if, even in your sleep, you could tell he wasn’t close enough anymore. You rolled over so that the two of you were face to face and your hand found his waist under the sheets. He was wide eyed and anxious, as he looked down at you, afraid you were going to wake up and he wasn’t going to know you.

Slowly and quietly, in hopes that he wouldn’t wake you, Hoseok brushed the hair away that had fallen in your face. His breath caught in his chest as he started to remember, a smile spread slowly across his face. He leaned in and pressed a kiss against the exposed skin of your neck, then another and another until you were squirming beneath him.

“What are you doing?” you groaned as his lips tickled your neck.

“I’m awake, y/n. I need attention.” he whined.

Not ready to wake up, you kept your eyes closed as you moved your hand up the warmth of his back. The sheets were so soft and his hands were so strong, gripping your hip. Everything felt so normal. Hoseok was awake and he remembered who you were.

Hoseok was awake and remembered who you were. Your eyes flew open and you sat up in bed taking in a quick gasp of air.

“What’s wrong?” Hoseok asked, “Did you forget where you were?”

Biting your lip, you looked over at him stretched out over the white bedding. Not where, you thought to yourself, but when.

“Yeah,” you smiled and laid back down, “or something like that, but just for a second.”

He hummed and slipped his arms around you, pulling you closer. “You were wrong, by the way.”

“About?” You asked, so comfortable you could have fallen back asleep.

“You said I’d change my mind about wanting you here.”

“Well, I’m glad you didn’t.”

It hadn’t been completely intentional, but the two of you spent the rest of the day together. Most of the day was spent in bed, which you’d had few complaints about. Later in the afternoon, ever the gentleman, Hoseok drew a bath for you to enjoy while he went down the street to pick up some food. You knew he’d probably intended on you staying relaxed in the water for longer than you did but you found yourself a little too restless to stay still for too long. For a while you meandered his apartment, not really looking for anything since you’d mostly seen all of it before. Back in his bedroom you raided his drawers finding the oversized sweater you’d seen him in and a pair of boxers, which surprised you since you’d never seen him wear them before. You dressed yourself in your findings and continued to walk around the apartment as you brushed your hair with his comb.

When he finally returned he found you in the cupboard searching for something unhealthy to snack on and disappointed that there was nothing. He’d brought back...everything. Hoseok realized when he’d gotten downstairs that he had never asked what you might want, so he just went to a bunch of places and hoped that he’d gotten something you’d like. Luckily, all of it was stuff you liked. Together you took refuge on the couch and devoured nearly every bite of food he brought home. As the hours ticked by and the afternoon inched into the evening you started to worry again. Worry that you’d have to leave him soon and that if, or more likely when, you finally did he’d only forget you again. However, as your movie binging, makeout marathoning continued on his couch, he never once asked you to leave. He didn’t even suggest it. Instead, as you tucked into him, what he did was run his hand up and down your back until you’d fallen asleep on his chest.  

It surprised you when Hoseok wanted to spend the next day with you as well. This time the two of you actually left the apartment. You’d gone to enjoy a late brunch. Afterwards you strolled around downtown. You stopped at several department stores to warm up but mostly you liked to go into designer boutiques and guess the prices of their ugliest pieces. Once your cheeks were permanently sore from laughing he brought you home, stopping on the way to grab dinner.

Sitting across the table from him made you sad because you realized that you couldn’t continue to spend all your time with him. This had been the longest amount of time you’d ever spent with him, even before the accident you were never really together for more than a couple hours, a day at the longest. You’d imagined you’d have gotten tired of him or he would have gotten bored of you. You thought, especially since you’d relived the beginning of your relationship a hundred times already, that he wouldn’t have anything new to offer but he kept you on your toes.

You stuffed your mouth with rice and curry, to avoid having to answer any questions about the change in your mood. You were just sad imagining being alone and worried that the second you left he would forget you and you’d have to restart this whole process over again.

When you finally told him you had to leave he looked equally sad. You knew it that it would be awhile until you could see him again. The event at your work was happening this week and you were going to be outrageously busy until it was over. You’d told him it would be at least a week until you’d be free to see him again. When you told him that he kissed you for a really long time in front of the cab he’d called for you. You were sure that if the meter wasn’t already running that the driver would have left you on the sidewalk, your mouths glued together.

He sighed when he finally pulled away, “Do you think that’s enough for a week?”

“No.” You laughed, “That’s not enough for even a day.”

“Glad you agree.” He grinned and leaned in to kiss your cheek. “We’ll just have a lot to catch up on when we see each other.”

“Coffee right?” You asked, “The cafe where we met. Sunday morning.”

“Sunday morning.” He confirmed.

“You won’t forget?”

He shook his head, “I won’t forget.”

“Hoseok,” you said in a whisper. He raised his eyebrows expectantly, “don’t forget me, okay? Promise you won’t forget me.”

“How could I ever forget you?” He laughed like it was ludicrous.

“Just, please. I know it sounds silly but will you just promise me?” you basically begged.

“Hey…” he cupped your cheeks in his hands and smiled brightly, “I promise, I will not forget you.”

~~~

Preparing for your work event was excruciating. It would have been regardless but it was more so because you spent every second you weren’t thinking about work thinking about Hoseok and whether or not he’d forgotten you yet. You’d removed your number from his phone before you’d left him, just in case, so if he’d wanted to get a hold of you he couldn’t. With barely a second to even eat or shower between preparations you definitely didn’t have a minute to contact Minhyuk to find out if he knew anything about Hoseok’s current memory status.

Saturday night, after the last guest left the event, the caterers drove off with their equipment, and the tables and chairs had been stacked and made ready to be picked up in the morning your shoulders finally fell with some relief. You’d been slightly worried you still wouldn’t be able to sleep before your meeting with Hoseok in the morning but your head crashed down on your pillow before you’d even taken off your heels.    

The cafe was busy for a sunday morning but you’d gotten there early and grabbed a coffee and a table. Hoseok was right on time, he looked amazing and there was nothing more you wanted to do than to kiss him but you waited instead. Waited to see what he would do when he saw you, because he always came to this cafe and him being here didn’t necessarily mean anything. For a blink you thought he was looking at you but you couldn’t be sure, and he walked passed your table to the counter without a word.

You watched out of the corner of your eye as he turned around a few minutes later, coffee in hand. It looked for a moment like he was headed straight for your table but instead he moved just passed it. He sat at a table across from you and opened his book, not unlike he had done a dozen times before. When he caught you looking at him he smiled kindly, which he’d also done plenty. You were becoming more and more certain that he’d forgotten you, like he’d definitely done before.

Feeling a little heartbroken your shoulders slumped. Part of you wondered if it was all the way back to square one, which meant hopelessness. Or, you wondered, maybe if you just spent every single moment together for the rest of your lives he’d be able to remember you. The thought alone was exhausting, but a big part of you thought you could manage it.

“I hate to bother you,” you looked up to see his smiling face, coffee in one hand and a book in the other, “but can I use that chair or are you waiting for someone?”

“Oh, go ahead, I’m not using it.”

You expected him to drag the chair away, like people usually did when they asked to use chairs, instead he sat down on the seat and placed his coffee on the table. He crossed one leg over the other before opening his book.

He grinned over at your confused face, “Sorry, I just felt like it was selfish for us to be using up two tables when we can just share this one. I won’t bother you.”

Unsure what to say you looked down at your book. You read nothing, you couldn’t focus long enough to comprehend the words. Sniffing with eyes brimmed with tears you were trying desperately not to cry out of frustration. You just wanted to stand up, grab his shoulders, and scream Remember Me!

“Rough story?” He asked.

You looked back up at him, “What?”

“I know I said I wouldn’t bother you but,” he nodded towards your book, “you look upset, pretty emotional story?”

“Yeah,” you nodded, “it’s devastating. Might be the worst love story of all time.”

“Why read it then?”

“I can’t seem to let it go, no matter how much it hurts.” You wiped your cheek and looked back down at the book.

The table fell into a comfortable silence, and you were able to calm yourself enough that you didn’t feel on the edge of an emotional breakdown. You hadn’t noticed, but Hoseok hadn’t looked back at his book. Not once. He’d been too preoccupied watching you.

After quite some time he finally leaned forward, planting his elbows on the table. “Y/n, can I ask you a question.”

“Of course.” You said looking up at him expectantly.

He looked almost sad, “Who hurt you?”

You leaned back, feeling slightly attacked by the question. “Excuse me?”

“Who hurt you?” He repeated.

Suddenly your brain seemed to start working again and your eyes went wide, “You said my name.”

“I can’t believe you really thought I’d forgotten you!” He exclaimed in disbelief, “What person on this planet made you feel so forgettable because I have a few choice words for them.”

This time you were really going to cry, but you had to keep it together. You wouldn’t just be able to explain to him why it meant so much to you that he remembered who you were. At least, you thought, you couldn’t do it without Minhyuk. He watched fascinated by how every part of you lifted and brightened in just the blink of an eye.

“You really remember me?” You asked.

“Well, I did promise you I would, didn't I?” He smirked over at you.

You bit your lip, “Tell me what you remember about me.”

He laughed and then realized you were being serious. “That’s such a weird request.”

“Please?”

“I remember a lot about you.” he looked you over for a second and dragged his bottom lip between his teeth, causing an instant blush to cross your cheeks, “like how soft your hips felt, especially when you had just gotten out of the bath. I remember how cute you looked in my sweater, and how you look even cuter when you stuff your cheeks with rice. I remember the way your hair smelled when you fell asleep on my chest. The way you taste, I remember the way all of you tastes.”

“Oh.” You let out a soft breath, not having expected that answer. He laughed at how immobile you seemed.

“I also remember that work project you had that kept us apart all week. How’d that go?”

He remembered you. So many thoughts rushed through your head, so many feelings and you felt incapable of expressing any of them properly. Instead you told him all about your hellish week before asking him about his and then making plans to spend the day together.

~~~

Minhyuk had been so thrilled by your news about Hoseok that he’d dropped the three hundred dollar bottle of tequila he’d been holding. He grabbed your face and kissed you right on the mouth he was so happy and all you could do was laugh because you knew the feeling well. The two of you discussed for a long while the best way to tell Hoseok about everything, deciding ultimately to wait until you knew for sure his memory lasting wasn’t a fluke. The decision had been Minhyuk’s. It had surprised you at first, until he explained that he’d already had to remind his best friend of the accident hundreds of times before and it never got any easier. He wanted to make sure this time it lasted.

You’d told Minhyuk to take his time, that the time of the reveal would be up to him. You had felt bad at first. It felt like you were lying to Hoseok whenever you were with him. Keeping a secret that affected him so deeply. Then weeks had passed and you found yourself too distracted by life with Hoseok. It had been three years. Three years of his demanding hands all over your body. His desperate and needy late night requests for your attention. Never spending more than a day together, rarely spending time overnight. Dates hadn’t been called dates, it was just hanging out. You had never been his girlfriend and he wasn’t your boyfriend. This time with him was different, it was better. It was date night’s and entire weekends together. And when Hoseok told you he wanted you meet Minhyuk and you asked him why he said it was because he thought it was important that his best friend and his girlfriend got along.  

After a delicious dinner at the restaurant and probably already too many drinks the three of you went back to Hoseok’s for more drinking and hanging out.

He’d been so affectionate all night. Holding your hand, kissing your shoulder, always making sure that you were comfortable and having a good time. Back at his place he’d grabbed your hand and led you over to the couch, he crashed down onto the cushions and pulled you onto his lap, “This has been the best day. Might as well be my birthday.”

“I’m glad you’re so happy, Hoseok.” You said before pressing a kiss against his cheek.

He looked over at Minhyuk who had walked over slowly, thoughtfully, “I’m glad you two get along. I hadn’t really been worried, but it was important to me.”

Min smiled at Hoseok and then looked over at you, “I think we should do it now.”

Hoseok looked between the two of you slightly confused, you leaned in and kissed his cheek once more before standing up from his lap. You weren’t sure where to go, you’d wanted to give him space but you also wanted to be there for him at the same time. Minhyuk sat beside him on the couch. Hoseok reached out, solving your dilemma for you by grabbing your hand, you weren’t going anywhere. You sat down on the edge of the coffee table in front of him.  

“What’s going on? Why does it feel so serious?” he looked over at you, he seemed almost scared so you squeezed his hand.

“Hoseok,” Minhyuk took a deep breath and exhaled, “You were in a bad accident.”

It was crushing to watch the myriad of feelings that crossed his face as Minhyuk went over all of the details of his accident, and then his recovery. He was so hurt, scared, and confused by all of it and what it meant. Tears fell down his cheeks as Minhyuk showed him pictures of his demolished car. Pictures of him bandaged and broken in the hospital bed during his coma. The stitches that had been taken out long ago and scars that were now hidden underneath the hair that had grown back. The x-rays of the plate in his leg. He squeezed your hand tightly through every step of the timeline. Finally nearing the end there were pictures of him after he’d woken up, when he was going through physical therapy. Your heart went out to Minhyuk who had retold Hoseok about his accident every single morning when he’d had panic attacks from waking up in the hospital.  

“...up until a few weeks ago you’d had short term memory loss.” Minhyuk had finished telling him almost everything he needed to know. “Since it finally seems like your memory might be sticking we thought it was time to tell you what happened again.”  

For the first time in almost an hour he dropped your hand. He ran his fingers through his hair with a sigh before looking over at you, “We didn’t just meet, did we?”

“We did, it just wasn’t for the first time.” you said in barely a whisper as Minhyuk handed him his old phone.

His forehead scrunched in confusion as he quietly scrolled through the photos on the phone, “Were we dating...before the accident?”

“Sort of. I’m starting to think we made it more complicated than it needed to be.”

“This was over years. We’ve been together for years.” he looked up at you expectantly. “Are we in love?”

“I think so.” you wiped a stray tear from your cheek, “We’ve never said it to each other but I think we are.”

The table vibrated as your leg bounced anxiously. You watched Hoseok scroll through the conversations on his phone. He spent a long time on the one he’d shared with you. It looked like he’d tried scrolling all the way back to the beginning of the conversation before reading it all out. He stared at the phone so long without moving the screen went black and he just kept staring. Finally he dropped the phone on the couch between him and Minhyuk. When he looked up at you his lips were trembling. You knew he was about to cry and you didn’t know what to say.

“Hoseok-” you started.

“You were so mad at me.” he said cutting you off.

“I didn’t know. I never would have said any of that if I’d known. I swear.”

He slipped down off of the couch in front of you and dropped his head in your lap. His arms wrapped around your waist and you could feel him crying. You looked at Minhyuk wide-eyed, unsure of what was happening, hoping he’d have something to offer but he only shrugged. You rubbed your hand over his back gently.

“I’m so sorry.” he mumbled into your lap.

Still confused and concerned you continued to rub his back, “Wait, why are you apologizing?”

“I hurt you so much. I’m so sorry.” he said as he cried even harder.

“Oh, Hoseok. No, it wasn’t your fault.”

He tightened his arms around you, pulling you closer. His face pressed against your stomach. “I almost lost you forever.”

You hunched over him awkwardly wrapping him up in a hug, “No, baby. You would have found me. You always find me.”

Minhyuk leaned back against the couch with a small smile on his face, “Physically, he is stronger than steel. Emotionally, a baby bunny.”

“Don’t listen to him.” You whispered against the top of Hoseok's head. He just squeezed you tighter.

~~~

“I can’t believe you cheated on me.” Hoseok said dropping his keys on the counter.

It had been a few weeks since you’d told him about the accident, and he’d been getting memories back ever since. Minhyuk and you told him all of the really big events that he’d forgotten and that seemed to open the gates as the rest of his memories came flooding back. More and more every day. Some of them were beneficial. Some of them, you were finding were just embarrassing for you, which Hoseok loved.

“What are you talking about?” you nearly shrieked, hanging up both of your coats on the rack.

He turned around and looked at you with raised eyebrows, “Don’t try and tell me you weren’t with other guys the entire year we were apart. You even told me you were going to sleep with that guy you were on a date with.”

“You remember that?” you asked surprised, “I barely even remembered Loey.”

“Too many notches on your bedpost?” he asked with a raised eyebrow and the tiniest smirk.

“Hoseok…”

“I however was not with anyone else,” he yelled dramatically throwing his arms in the air, “because I was in a coma!”

“It’s not funny.” you frowned, “If I could go back…”

“Yeooooosin.” he sang, pulling you into a hug. He kissed your neck in quick little pecks until you were laughing in his arms, “I’m just kidding.”

You ran your hands up his back and over his broad shoulders, squeezing him tight, “I don’t like that joke.”

He leaned back and kissed your forehead. “Okay, I’ll think of a new one.”

You hummed, with a purse of your lips at him and went into the living room where you plopped onto the couch and waited for your very attention needy boyfriend. When he finally arrived he was carrying wine glasses and a smile on his face.

“I also can’t believe you stuck it out with me. That must have been so hard. Why did you do it? For months and months.”

You looked over at him, accepting the wine glass, and laughed to yourself. “Isn’t it obvious? You have a really hot body and a lot of money.”

He clicked his tongue in annoyance, “Just confess that you love me.”

“Never.”

“Well I can’t until you do. So I guess we’re just at a standstill.” He pouted.

You took a quick gulp of wine before placing it on the coffee table. He came around, set his glass next to yours and stretched out on the couch, laying his head in your lap.

“I keep waiting for you to kick me out.” you said quietly, running your hand through his hair.

“Why would I ever kick you out? Why would I ever want this to end?”

“You have your memories back now. I figured it’s only a matter of time until you remember that we were never really like this before, and how you don’t really want to be couple-y with me.”

Hoseok popped up from your lap, and stared at you from the other side of the couch, “Yeah… I have my memory back, which means I remember you never wanted to be in a relationship with me.”

You scoffed at the accusation.” Hoseok, you said you didn’t want to really date because you were so busy with work all the time and you felt it would be unfair.”

“I only ever said that because you always told me not to get confused about what we were doing with each other.”

“Hoseok!” you practically screamed, eyes wide in shock, “I said that because I wanted you to think I was still just a chill, down girl, like I was when we met. Then, I don’t know, you made me want more. I didn’t want to scare you off with all my feelings or by being too clingy!”

“Y/n! Are you kidding me?” he screamed back in frustration.

You watched as he jumped from the couch and stormed out of the living room. As you waited you stood up, this felt like a fight and you felt too vulnerable sitting down.

He stomped back into the room with a low growl, and a small black box in his hand. “I have been in love with you forever, you idiot. I just kept waiting for you to finally get to where I was so I could tell you. Waiting for you to love me back so I could give you this!”

Your eyes went wide and your body tensed as he went to open the box but you relaxed at the sight of the brand new silver key. “Is that a house key?!”

“Yes! I love you and I want you to live with me!” you’d yelled at him so he felt it was only appropriate to yell back.

“What the hell? I’ve loved you for so long! You thought I would just hang out here for months when you didn’t even know who I was because I just wanted to be fuck buddies again?!”

“No!” he shouted, albeit confused, “Why are we yelling!”

You threw your hands up, “I don’t know!”

“You started it!”

“Yeah, because I love you!”

“Well I love you too!” he yelled one last time and then smiled, “...so come here and kiss me already.”

He closed the box with the key and tossed it onto the table as you moved towards him, throwing your arms around his shoulders and meeting his lips with yours.

You smiled against the kiss and mumbled, “You’re so stupid.”

“And yet you’re the one who loves me.” he mumbled back. He sat back down on the couch, taking you with him. Your knees landed on either side of him as you sat on his lap, and leaned into the kiss. He let the kiss go on for some time before pulling away, “I love you, seriously. Be my girlfriend?”

“I was already your girlfriend.” you laughed, moving back into the kiss.

He pulled away again and you groaned, “And move in with me?”

“Obviously! Yes.” you landed the smallest kiss on his lips before he pulled away again, “Jesus! What?”

“Marry me?” he grinned.

Your eyes blew wide and you slapped his shoulder, “Hoseok!”

“Yeah, you’re right, too soon. We should date for awhile. Maybe move your stuff in first, and then I’ll try again.” he reasoned.

He caught your eyes with his and you knew he was playing his game, his battle of the wills. His face mostly neutral except for the pout that accentuated his lips and the clear amusement that glistened in his eyes as he waited for you to crumble.

Dragging your teeth across your bottom lip you grinned, “Ask me again then. When I’m all moved in, and we’re laying in our bed. I’ll have my head on your chest and you’ll be doing that thing where you drag your fingertips over my back. Ask me like that.”

His eyes scanned yours for a long while after you’d stopped talking as he tried to figure out if you were serious. Then, as if he’d been replaying the words over in his head until he finally believed them, he turned his face away. Breaking contact because the joy he’d felt looking at you had become too overwhelming.

With a small laugh you leaned forward and kissed his exposed neck before resting your head on his shoulder. “I win.”

He hummed in agreement, “Yeah, but I win too.”

[dontworrysunflower]

Hint Hint | Shawn Mendes

This was originally gonna be ‘Scariest Thing’ but it was completely different so here’s another proposal Shawn!

Warnings: tears, fluff, I think some language

Enjoy! Masterlist in my bio

•••

He was in the studio, bobbing his head to the beat he’s made since he got there this morning.

Teddy started talking about some more beats and lyrics when Shawn’s phone started to buzz in his back pocket.

His fingers tapped on the screen of his iPhone, the smile taking up most of his face when he sees who texted him.

“God dude, what’s got you looking like a mad man?” Zubin asked, looking at Shawn with a puzzled look.

Shawn looks over his phone, “(y/n) texted me.”

Everyone groans, rolling their eyes, leaning back in their seats.

“What? What’s so wrong with texting my girl?”

“When are y’all gonna get married yet? You guys are so cute it’s gross and annoying. You could use a honeymoon, even we could.” Brian complained.

“Wait, yeah. Why haven’t you and (y/n) gotten married?” Teddy joined the conversation.

Shawn sends his string of heart emojis to her before turning off his phone and throwing the device on the pillow next to him. He looks up at everyone, shrugging. “I d’know. We’re both just busy I guess. I’m going back on tour in a couple weeks and she’s graduating from college this year. It’s just not in the books right now.”

“Do you plan on marrying her?” Teddy asked, turning around in her chair, her full attention to the blushing man.

Shawn gives her a look. “Of course I plan on marrying her. I’d be an idiot if I let her go. I plan on it in the future, just not in the near future, if that makes sense.” He runs his fingers through his brown curls.

He’s been getting these signs lately. He’s seen at least six proposals this week, and it was only Tuesday. Everyday on his way to and from the studio, he can’t help but notice the huge billboard, advertising a jewelry company, their background; someone proposing. And now this. Even his friends have caught into the loop.

Of course he wants to marry her, again, he’d be an idiot if he didn’t. He can’t wait for the day to finally, officially make her his. He can’t wait to get down on one knee in front of her, a large shiny rock in the box in his shaking hands, a sappy speech, and so many tears. He can’t wait to watch the love of his life walk down the aisle, a beautiful white dress adorning her body. He can imagine everything.

It’s just not the right time.

•••

He was on his way back home, passing by that billboard again. He texted her that he was in his way, and he would stop by her favorite restaurant for some food.

He stood in the line of the restaurant, patiently waiting when his phone rang.

Unknown ID

His curiosity got the best of him and he pressed the green answer button.

“Hello?” He answered, moving up in the line.

“Hello sir, your ring is ready at the store for pickup.”

“I’m sorry?” Shawn furrows his eyebrows.

“Uh, your engagement ring. It’s ready for pick up.” The male on the other end said, as if it couldn’t be more obvious.

“Uh, wrong number.” And he hung up.

He waits a little longer for the food to be ready. When he grabs the bag, he walks out the door, the cool Toronto hitting his pink cheeks. His eyes move over across the street, the illuminated diamond capturing his attention. The jewelry on the display cases shine in the bright sunlight. He chews on his lips and looks down at the bag of food.

He crosses the street.

•••

“Baby! I’m home!” Shawn exclaimed as he closed the apartment door behind him, the bag of food in one hand, a bulge in his back pocket.

“In the bedroom!”

He leaves the food on the kitchen island, toes off his boots and makes his way to their bedroom.

“Hi sweetie” Shawn greeted her with a kiss and jumped on the bed, his head in her lap.

“Hi honey. How was recording?” She asked with a smile, her fingers threading through his curls.

“Good. Finished the bridge. Think of recording our next song soon. Hey, are you busy tomorrow?” He asked, picking his head up to look into her eyes.

She looks up, thinking. “Uh, I have lunch with my mom tomorrow. Why? Are you going to the studio tomorrow too?”

He shakes his head. “Everyone’s busy tomorrow. Wanna go on a date tomorrow night?” He beamed up at her, the felt box in his pocket burning a hole.

“Are you asking me out?” She smirked

He got up from his position, cupping her face in his hands. “I guess I am. I’m taking that as a yes, foods ready in the kitchen.” He kisses her nose and walks to the dresser to change into some sweats before going into the kitchen.

•••

He’s called the restaurant at least five times to make sure he had the reservation. Wanted it to be romantic and private. He took up all of his day to pick out his outfit, ultimately calling Tiff to help him pick out his outfit over facetime. She squealed when he told her what he was doing.

He heard the door swing open from his seated position on the couch. He hurries to the door, catching (y/n) off guard. “Hi baby,” He hurriedly kisses her cheek and takes her bags. “go get ready for our date.”

He pushes her through the apartment and into the bedroom. “Shawn, why are you in such a hurry?”

He was this close to giving his plan away, but instead, he just shoved you into the bedroom, telling to get ready and that he’ll be waiting in the living room.

He rubbed his palms up and down his slack covered thigh as he waited for you.

He doesn’t know why he’s doing this so suddenly.

He’s pulled away from his thoughts when he hears her heels click against the wood flooring of their apartment. He looks up to catch her gaze, his mouth gapes open and he realizes scratch that, of course I know why I’m doing this.

“Holy shit baby, you look absolutely stunning.”

The tight leather of your skirt accentuated your curves perfectly. The gold jewelry around your neck shiny over your black turtleneck. Your outfit was amazing.

Your red lips curve into a smile as Shawn got up from the couch and moved in front of you, his hands on your hips as his eyes moved over your body, making you blush.

“You’re so beautiful (y/n). God I’m so lucky.” He smiled as his eyes came up to meet yours and he leans in for a light kiss on the lips, some red stained on his when he pulled away. “Are you ready baby?”

You nodded as you reached up to his face with a hand, rubbing off the red lipstick on his lips, smiling at him.

•••

“Reservation for Mendes please?” Shawn said when you walked into the fancy, empty restaurant building. You looked around at the absence of people in curiosity as Shawn talked with the hostess about our seating.

“Where’s everyone?” You whispered into Shawn’s ear. Your hands are wrapped around his bicep as you continue to gaze around.

“Oh I uh,” Shawn started as the hostess led us to a back area, closed off by french doors. “I reserved the entire place.”

“Why would you do that?” You asked as the hostess left and Shawn pulled out the chair for you to sit.

“Privacy. I can’t remember the last time we’ve had a meal without someone asking for a picture with me. And I wanted tonight to be different.” He said as he moved across from you to sit.

“Shawn there was no need-”

“What can I get you guys started with? Drinks?”

“A whiskey on the rocks for me and a martini for the beautiful lady.” Shawn answered, keeping his eyes on you.

•••

You watched the waiters take away your plates, Shawn clears his throat.

“You want some dessert honey?” He asked

You pat your stomach. “I’m so full, I don’t think I can eat anything else.”

“Oh c’mon babe, they have your favorite cheesecake..” Shawn insinuated. “I know you can’t resist the cheesecake.”

You sigh and lean back on the chair. “Fine. You know me to well.”

Shawn calls for a waiter and tells them what you wanted. You got up to go the bathroom and you could here their faint whispering.

When you came back, Shawn looked nervous. Every other second he would rake his fingers through his hair. His breathing became uneven and he was always looking around. His leg bounce up and down. “Baby, are you okay? What’s wrong?” You reaches over the table to place you small hand over his, which was kind of clammy. You give it a squeeze.

“Oh shit.” He whispered as he saw the waiter come with a plate behind you.

Shawn waited for the man to place the plate in front of you before he got up front his seat. You look down at the plate, a large diamond on the cake, some cursive words were written in chocolate.

Will you marry me?

You gasped and you vision gets blurry. From the corner of your eye you se some movement, and you look up to see Shawn kneeling down on one knee, his hand coming up into the cake to take the ring off.

“(Y/n) I,” Shawn laughs through his tears “I didn’t think of this yesterday and I wasn’t planning on doing this for another couple of years. But I kept getting signs. Yesterday everyone kept asking me when we’ll get married. And everyday on my way to the studio there’s this billboard with a someone proposing on it. And when I went to get food yesterday, I just decided to walk across the street and got a ring because even though it may not be the right time, I know you’re the right one for me.” He sobbed. Your tears falling down your face as he spoke to you.

“The past three years with you have been the best in my life and I could never imagine my life any different. Everyday I can imagine what being married to you would feel like, and I don’t want to imagine anymore. I want it to be real. I’ve finally made the proposal imagination real. I want you to be walking down the aisle to be real. Will you make them real and, marry me?”

You sobbed as you slid out of chair to kneel in front of him, taking the ring from his hands and sliding it on your finger. You both cried some more as he enclosed his arms around your waist and you fall on the floor. There’s cheers behind you and you turn to see the restaurant staff clapping, some wiping their tears away.

“I know it’s not the best time to be doing this but-”

“I couldn’t imagine it any different. I love you so much.” You said before you kissed him.

As his lips moved against yours, he thought of the past few days. He finally realized why he kept looking at those things.

He finally got the hint.

Finally did it the way it was meant. ‘Scariest thing’ was supposed to be this but like half way through writing it I realized it was nothing like a planned so I just made this one as well. I love this because that’s how my parents got engaged. So close to home. Anyway hope you enjoyed and pls reblog!

[shireness-says]

Swan’s Seven (2/?)

Summary: After two years behind bars, Emma’s out, and she’s got a plan in mind. Now to put together the perfect team… Let’s stage an art heist. (A CS Ocean’s 8 AU) ~3.9K. Rated T for language. Chapter 1.  Also on AO3.

~~~~~

A/N: And we’re back! With more players, more action, and more razzing on David. It’s a national sport after all. A certain someone shows up this chapter too...

Thanks as always to my wonderful beta, @snidgetsafan. This doesn’t happen without you, babe. 

Tags: @optomisticgirl, @spartanguard, @profdanglaisstuff, @captainsjedi, @thisonesatellite, @thejollyroger-writer, @let-it-raines, @teamhook, @kmomof4, @snowbellewells, @searchingwardrobes, @winterbaby89, @scientificapricot. Shoot me a message if you want to be added/taken off the list.

Enjoy, and let me know what you think!

~~~~~

Regina has always been good at finding the exact right person for any given job, and it seems that hasn’t changed in the two years that Emma has been away. She somehow knows everybody who’s anybody in this business, like the criminal version of a recruiter or HR lady. She’d probably hate being called that, but it’s an apt comparison. 

Only days after Emma divulges her plan to Regina, she’s presented with a short stack of manila folders - Regina’s top choices for their needs.

“I think you’ll be pleased,” she says as Emma flips through the top folder. It’s just a cursory glance, really; Emma trusts Regina’s judgement implicitly after all their years as a pair. “They’re the best I could find.”

“I’m sure they are,” Emma replies nonchalantly. “You’ve got them scheduled to come in for an interview or whatever?”

“Later today,” Regina agrees, before fixing Emma with a stern look. “You’re going to play nice, right? We need these people, I can’t have you getting all demanding or treating them like they’re idiots.”

“Ok, first of all, it’s an interview, there’s going to be questions so I can’t really help the demanding thing. Second of all, why the hell am I the one we’re worried about getting uppity? That’s kind of your thing, scaring people off with a condescending sniff.” Emma really hadn’t meant to sound quite so demanding with that list, but that’s the result anyways. Maybe Regina has a point - though Emma still thinks her partner is the one who needs the warning to “play nice”. Whatever that means. Fuck it all, they’re career conpersons, the nice line has already kind of been blown to smithereens. 

Regardless, the warning proves unnecessary, since Emma can tell within minutes that Regina’s first candidate is exactly who they’ve been looking for.

“Emma, this is Ruby Lucas. Ruby, Emma Swan.” With the way Regina makes introductions, you’d think they were having some fancy corporate business meeting, not planning an art heist above a nightclub. Emma has the strongest urge to start offering business cards. “Ruby’s a safecracker - the best on the east coast.”

“Well…” Ruby drawls, her red-painted lips twisting into something wry and just shy of wolfish. Emma thinks it kind of suits the brunette, especially paired with her casual sprawl across one of Regina’s stiff backed chairs. 

As much as Emma is amused, however, Regina is not. That eye roll could probably be seen from space. “Fine. The best on the east coast who hasn’t decided to retire to some disgusting fairytale in backwoods Maine like a goddamn schmuck. Better? Satisfied?”

“Better. Satisfied is a whole other thing, sweetcheeks,” Ruby winks salaciously. Not that there seems to be any heat behind it; if Emma had to guess, it’s just a flirtatious habit. There are worse habits to have, really. Her flirting accomplished, Ruby focuses her attention on Emma. “So. I hear you have a plan.”

“I do. Did Regina brief you on the specifics?”

Ruby nods. “Brantley 3900, she said. Digital fingerprint system on top of a trio of combo locks, plus an acid failsafe. I could use some info about the big picture plan, though.”

“We’ll get there,” Emma promises. Ruby isn’t at all what she would have expected of their safecracker in her short skirt and high heels and bright red hair streaks - especially when Emma’s used to dealing with her brother for this kind of thing - but she likes the saucy brunette. That flirtatious energy could really come in handy, if they play their cards right. “You think you can break it?”

“No problem,” Ruby replies with her bubbling confidence. “We’ll just need those prints, and the rest is all tumblers. Nothing I can’t handle.”

Emma looks to Regina, who inclines her head in a subtle nod. Excellent; they’re on the same page, then. “You’re hired.”

Their next candidate - a computer whiz and hacker - might as well be Ruby’s polar opposite. Elsa Frost shows up in a neat skirt suit and heels that only emphasize her pale skin and white blonde hair, dressed for all appearances like she’s interviewing at a law firm. For god’s sake, she even brings resumes in a file folder, the two pages paper clipped for maximum convenience. You can’t make this shit up. Emma wonders idly if their prospective keyboard artist has any idea what she’s walked into.

Surprisingly, reading the resume provided is illuminating. Ms. Frost certainly does know what she’s here for (“And this is an art theft, yes?”), but she cut her teeth, so to speak, in providing network security for major banks. Really, there’s no one better to hack past security systems than someone who made a career trying to prevent exactly that. 

Emma still has questions, however. Namely: “How exactly did you end up on the less legal side of things?” It’s more than a valid question, considering the formal interview attire. It seems that Elsa doesn’t know how these things usually play out. 

“I have a sister,” Elsa explains. “She’s the only family I have in the world, and she just got engaged. To a Central Park carriage driver. Wants the whole big to-do, which of course is very expensive. You know, the big white dress and the massive cake and the three courses and the specialty cocktail. So I’ve been looking into… alternative income streams.”

“Admirable,” Regina drawls, clearly unimpressed. “But there are plenty of other ways to make money. Legal ones. I’m sure you could make a very generous living just off of consulting with your skills. Why this?”

Elsa flushes, the rush of blood especially evident beneath her pale skin. Still, Regina and Emma wait in silence. They don’t need someone on their team who’s a risk, and that kind of motive makes any con with common sense worry their contact will go to the police when all is said and done. So they’ll wait, as long as it takes Elsa to come up with a real answer or prove herself too much of a risk to gamble on.

She cracks, of course. Facing down two such intimidating stares, anyone would. “Maybe I was bored,” Elsa finally says. Her chin lifts with the words like she’s trying to muster all her dignity - not that it works. “I’d done security for Wall Street firms and major banks for years. Eventually, you tire of trying to close all the loopholes that hackers are testing. Your entire career and your entire life becomes reactionary. Working on the other side… I get to exercise a little more creativity and problem solving and thinking outside the box, which is why I fell in love with programming in the first place.”

Emma makes eye contact with Regina and shrugs. “Works for me.”

Elsa stares back, disbelieving. “That’s it? That’s what you needed to hear?”

“We get boredom,” Emma explains.

“And we absolutely understand thinking the criminal side is a little more fun,” Regina adds. Like she knows anything about fun. 

(Ok, that’s not fully true; Emma half remembers a few tequila nights. Regina gets rowdy when she has enough to drink.)

“Where we’re going with this,” Emma finishes, “is that you’re in if you want it. I trust that after all that banking experience, you can work your way around their firewalls and whatnot?”

“Sure can. Check the bar’s accounts if you don’t believe me, I took the liberty of going ahead and transferring my $100 consultation fee.”

Well, that’s one way to prove your point.

“So that’s two down. Who’s next?” Emma asks after Elsa and her business suit depart.

Regina smirks. “Field trip.”

The field trip is to the Metropolitan Museum of Art, where they watch a young woman paint a replica of one of the portraits - a particularly unflattering source work featuring a distinctly masculine-looking woman. It makes the reproduction their prospective partner is working on all the more impressive, that she’s able to replicate that particular variety of unfortunate realism. 

“Belle French,” Regina explains under her breath. “She should be a rising young artist on the New York scene after graduating from Columbia, but tastes these days run a little more abstract and her style probably leans closest to the romantic or rococo. Instead, she’s stuck teaching intro level courses at a local community college.”

“What a waste.”

“Indeed. She’s absolutely broke and absolutely talented, and absolutely desperate. Teaching shitty freshmen who can’t draw a straight line and want to argue about their grades constantly does things to a person, or so I’d imagine. If we play our cards right, make the right approach…”

“She could be our girl.” Our forger, Emma means, but that’s a stupid thing to say out loud in an art museum.

“She could.”

Emma observes for just a moment longer before nodding decisively and making her move. She’s the one who’s got tact, after all; as good as Regina is about searching people out, she’s a little too blunt for this kind of negotiation.

“That looks beautiful,” Emma comments when she’s standing just behind Belle’s shoulder. “You’re very talented.”

“Thank you!” Where Elsa blushes, Belle beams. Here, it’s a sign of someone who’s been denied warranted validation for too long, and who’s looking to gobble it up even from unusual sources. It’s a good sign for their purpose; even if they’re cons, Emma and Regina can provide the validation she seems to be craving. 

“Is this just a hobby, or do you do this for a living?” Emma knows the answer, of course, but that might as well be rule number one of running a con: never show all your cards.

Belle makes a little wistful, frustrated noise. “Oh, I wish. This is just my free time, unfortunately. Hopefully it will help me hone my skills.”

“I don’t know. From where I’m standing, you look pretty skilled already. If this is your dream, I don’t think the talent issue is what’s keeping you from reaching it.”

“Yes, well, my dreams also feature millions of dollars and a functional love life. Some things, unfortunately, just aren’t going to happen, and I’m afraid this might be one of them.”

“I think I can help with some of that, at least,” Emma smiles. “I’d love to take you to coffee, maybe discuss it a little.”

“Like a job? Painting?” Belle’s skepticism is plastered all over her face. Not that Emma can blame her; it probably sounds just a little too good to be true.

“Something like that.”

“You can’t be serious.”

“I absolutely am, if you’re interested in learning more.”

It’s a close thing, Emma thinks, but Belle does show up in the back corner of Regina’s favorite little Italian bakery an hour later.

“Why do I get the feeling this isn’t exactly a legal opportunity that you want to talk about?” Belle asks right away. Still, she seems utterly unfazed by the idea of it as she calmly sips a cappuccino. 

“Probably because it isn’t,” Emma replies, equally calm.

“Hypothetically,” Regina makes sure to add. Maybe that’s what she should have been in another life - a lawyer for the mob. Not that it matters, especially since Emma changes her mind every other time Regina opens her mouth. 

“Hypothetically,” Emma makes sure to emphasize, “we’re planning a job that would require someone with top notch artistic skills.”

“And you think that someone is me.”

“Hypothetically, yes,” Regina agrees. 

“But why me?” Belle argues. “I’m barely good enough to teach a bunch of college students. What makes you think that I’m skilled enough for whatever you have in mind - hypothetically have in mind?”

“Your style, ironically the very thing that’s really kept you from breaking into the art world, is exactly what we need for our purposes.” Somehow, Regina manages to make it all sound completely reasonable, though Emma knows it’s not. They’re talking about forgery and theft, for Christ’s sake. 

“And if I say no?”

“Then this conversation never happened,” Emma replies easily. “Look, my partner may be a little over-enthusiastic with the hypotheticallys, but it means we haven’t actually been planning anything in a way that you could take to the police. Look, I’ll be level with you - we can probably find another artist if need be. They’re out there. But they’re not you, Ms. French, and when we say we want the best, that’s you. For better or worse. The payout - sorry, the hypothetical payout would be more than enough to set you up. No more teaching brats with an attitude. We can help your originals find a way to market - legitimate or otherwise. There’s a lot of doors you can open with the kind of money we’re talking about.”

“Think about it and let us know.” Regina slides a card across the table - blank except for a starkly printed phone number. A burner, obviously, and perfect for what they have in mind. “You’re just the woman we need, and I think we’re just the opportunity you need.”

Emma and Regina barely make it to the end of the next block before the phone buzzes. 

I’m in.

Two pieces to go.

It’s a relatively short cab ride to Battery Park, where Regina says they’ll find their next crew member. “This is the pickpocket?” Emma asks as they stroll past a particularly fragrant food cart. Ah, New York. 

“This is the pickpocket,” Regina echoes back. “Tink Green. Young, but talented. She could easily break into larger jobs if she had the inclination, though I’m not sure that she does.”

“Tink? Seriously?”

“I know.” Regina rolls her eyes. “But yes, seriously. No idea what her real name is, she refuses to tell. If you have to have a stupid nickname, though, might as well make it a bad fairy fingers pun.”

“Yeah, I suppose.” A crowd is gathered up ahead along the railings bordering the river. “So where is she?”

“You see the blonde weaving through the crowd?” Regina asks, nodding in a general direction. “With the bun and the scarf and the headphones?”

“Yeah?” The woman in question looks utterly distracted - just another twenty-something absorbed in her phone.

“Watch.”

It looks like any other passing interaction - a distracted pedestrian not watching where they’re going, despite passerbys’ attempts to step around her. However, Emma’s a thief. She can spot the way that when the blonde bumps into an unsuspecting businessman, only the hand holding her phone comes up to brace on his torso, while the other steals into his coat pocket.

“Smooth,” she mutters. “I wonder if that’s all she’s got.”

Regina smiles  a wicked, amused smile. “Let’s go find out, shall we?”

“Just make sure you don’t have anything valuable in your pockets.”

With the leisurely pace Tink saunters along at - just the right speed to feign distraction and avoid any serious attention - it’s easy for Emma and Regina to catch up along either side. “Impressive show,” Emma comments casually.

She’ll give the pickpocket this - she’s a good faker. Emma only sees the momentary flash of recognition tinged with panic because she’s looking for it. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she replies. Tink’s accent is unusual; Australian, maybe, or possibly New Zealander. 

“That lift,” Emma continues. “Very well done. Practically seamless.”

“Again, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I think you’ve got the wrong person. Now if you’ll excuse me…” Tink’s eyes flit briefly to either side, looking for an easy escape like any good con.

“Oh relax,” Regina cuts in with that exasperated drawl she’s perfected. “We’re not here to bust you. We’ve actually got a job. Think of this as your interview.”

“You’ve lost me.”

“Regina Mills. This is my partner, Emma Swan.” Tink straightens, almost imperceptibly. “Ah, so you know who we are.”

“Run with a certain crowd, and it’d be hard not to.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” Emma replies. “Like Regina said, we’ve got a job. Need someone with light fingers. A little teamwork and big payout.”

“How big?”

“Big enough not to say in such a public place.” Regina produces another card. “If you’d like to know more, come by the Poison Apple the day after tomorrow, around 2pm. We’ll share all the details with the team then. That is, if you’re interested.”

“I might be,” Tink hazards.

“Anything holding you back?” Emma asks. It’s obvious Tink is the woman for the job - talented and just charming enough for a little undercover prep work if need be. If there’s anything they can say to get her on board right now, Emma will gladly do it.

“Who’s the mark?”

Not the question she’d anticipated, but Emma can roll with it. “Zelena West.”

Unexpectedly, the other blonde bursts into a peal of laughter. “That piece of work?”

“The very same,” Regina replies with a wry smile.

“In that case, count me in. About time that bitch got what’s coming to her.”

Who knew it could be so easy - uniting a group of people around hatred of one disgustingly rich woman?

——— 

The last thing Emma expects to see when she and Regina finally make it back to the loft about the nightclub is a man already waiting outside the door, rocking back and forth on his heels with both hands shoved into the pockets of his leather jacket. As Regina wrangles the lock, the man springs to attention. “Ms. Mills?”

“Yes, yes, come in.” She’s obviously expecting him, as she holds the door wide open for the man to walk through, though her face never changes from mild irritation. Typical Regina. Though Emma can’t imagine why she’s letting him in to start with. 

“This one of your vendors, Regina?” she asks, closing the door. The man has come to stand in the middle of the room, looking around like he’s waiting for something.

Regina scoffs. “Don’t be ridiculous, Emma, the bar’s vendors come on Monday. This is our fence.”

Emma isn’t entirely sure what face she’s making, but it’s certainly not good. “Him?” she asks needlessly, earning herself an eye roll.

“No, the other man standing in the corner. Yes, him. This is Killian Jones.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Emma,” he says - warmly enough, she’ll grant - extending a hand to shake. 

Unfortunately for him, Emma’s not in a mood for warmly enough. “We are not on a first name basis,” she all but snaps before quickly pivoting to address Regina. “Can I talk with you for a moment?”

“What is your problem, Emma?” Regina hisses once they’re a reasonable distance away. Not that they’ve found true privacy; that doesn’t exactly exist in the loft space.

“He’s a he!” she hisses back.

“How didn’t you know that? I gave you the file.”

“It’s not like I read in-depth or anything! You always give me a little rundown anyways. I saw the name and figured they were a her, not a… him.” The last word is practically spat out like a curse. Absolutely melodramatic, not that Emma cares.

“And is that a problem? It’s not like you told me you wanted only women.”

“Yeah, well, I thought I wouldn’t have to when everyone else you offered up was of the female persuasion. Isn’t there anyone else?”

“No. You want the best, I find you the best. That man can find or sell practically anything, like a modern day pirate. Or something less stupid.”

Emma ignores Regina’s denial. “What about Jasmine? She’s great, she’d be good for this.”

Regina shakes her head. “She and Al just had a baby, so she’s out of the game for a while.”

“I guess I can get that. You send something?”

“Gift cards for take out and a card signed with both our names.”

“Oh, thanks for that. What about Kathryn?”

“Went to prison last year. And you hate her anyways after she flirted with your brother.”

“It’s more because she’s a prissy little rich girl who got into the black market because she thought it’d be fun.”

“No, it’s because she was hitting on David. I very narrowly escaped attending a debutante ball, if you remember, so I’m technically one of those prissy little rich girls,” Regina points out.

“Yeah, but I like you,” Emma sighs. “Bet her daddy bribed someone to get her sentence reduced.”

“Oh, undoubtedly. Still doesn’t change the fact that she’s unavailable.”

“What about —” Emma starts, only to be interrupted.

“Look, I’ll go find you someone else if you insist, someone female,” Regina argues, “but they’re not going to be as good as him. There’s no one else out there who’s got the amount of connections in the black market art world that he does, and he’s got strong footholds in advanced tech to boot. Just what we need. So are you going to quit your tantrum and suck it up, or am I going to have to put out feelers again?” She waits for an answer with arms crossed - never an inviting look.

“Fine,” Emma finally grumbles. “But he’s got a lot of ground to make up.”

“Yeah, and I’m sure you won’t let him forget it,” Regina mutters back under her breath.

Jones does them all the favor of pretending he didn’t hear any of that conversation when the women rejoin him. “Swan, is it?” he asks, extending that hand again. Today, Emma really feels like the last human on Earth who doesn’t feel a pressing need to follow that particular societal convention.

“That’s me,” Emma replies with as much enthusiasm as she can muster. It’s not much. “Regina says you’re the best around.”

“In more ways than one,” he winks. Mistake.

“Let’s get something straight right now: this flirting, or whatever you’re hoping to pull off? It’s not going to work on me,” Emma replies with venom hiding just behind her voice. “We’re here to stage a heist, and all I care about are results. This is about the job, and if you can’t keep it professional, then you can walk back out the door right now and we’ll find someone else.” 

They stare at each other for a moment, Emma hoping to establish her dominance right there and then, before Jones finally cracks a closed-mouthed smile and nods. “Won’t be a problem, Swan. I’m at your disposal.”

“Good. We’ll see you in two days for a full overview of the plan and to get this show on the road.”

“As you wish,” he declares, sketching a short bow. After a last nod to Regina, he leaves again, now a problem for another day.

“I still don’t like him,” Emma declares to Regina. The other woman is smiling like the cat who got the canary, and Emma hates it.

“You don’t have to,” the other woman replies, “but he’s going to make this work. You’d be an idiot to fight against that.”

“All I’m saying is he better be as good as you promise.” There’s something about Killian Jones that makes her nervous, something she can’t quite put her finger on. Not his skills; Emma trusts Regina on that front. Something about his attitude, or his confidence. That’s not important right now, though, when there’s plans to make and details to nail down. 

Killian Jones may be an unknown variable, but he’s one she can’t deny they need - and for the moment, that’s more important than any of her concerns. 

[bensroger]

A Night to Remember - Ben Hardy! Roger Taylor

Summary: Based off of a Star is Born, Roger is captivated when he first lays eyes on Y/N, performing on the stage at open mic night. He takes a chance and asks out, and they end up spending the rest of the night together.

Word Count: 3278

Warnings: Just a little swearing

A/N: Sorry for the repost, tumblr is shit and it didn’t show up under the tags. This is only my second fic, and I didn’t proofread. It’s not exactly like A Star is Born but heavily inspired by it. Idk how I feel about it to be honest, I said smile/laugh sooo much. I tried to not make it super cliche, but I still hope you really like this! I still didn’t proofread so excuse any errors please!

He was exhausted of the flashy parties with girls crowding around him, each out-flirting the last. Roger couldn’t complain—he loved the parties and the endless line of girls, but he was just simply tired of loud and crazy parties. He only wanted a break for one night.

So while his band-mates went off to another party after their concert in Seattle, Roger decided to just go to a mellow, and quiet bar. Walking around the dim streets, he’d only find bars full of annoying college kids or full of people drowning their sorrows. He was about to head back to the hotel until he was drawn to a specific bar. A blue neon sign so bright that it hurt to look at, read “Blue Moon Bar,” and had flashes of stars around it. It was beyond freezing at this point, and nearly pouring rain, so Roger decided it’d be best to at least try this bar out. At least it had an intriguing name…

When he stepped in, it was dead silent, and everyone’s eyes were drawn to an older women singing on the stage. Great, he thought, It’s open mic night… Roger figured he could at least order a beer or two, maybe it’d actually be fun to see people fail at sing.

After a few good singers and definitely a lot of bad ones, there was only one singer left. The host, a young girl who herself sang terribly earlier, stepped on the stage to announce the last song. “And now, everyone’s favorite, our very own Y/N!” Roger almost laughed to himself thinking about how awful the other singers were… How good could this Y/N really be?

A girl with shining, curled, y/h/c hair stepped on the stage, standing out even though the lights were dim. She was wearing a slim fit, black dress, with white gloves that went above her elbows. Roger couldn’t lie, he was struck by her appearance… Nonetheless, he still believed her singing was going to be absolute shit.

“Well hello again Blue Moon Bar, I’m so glad to be here again.” Y/N smiled into the mic, her eyes full of excitement. “So I’ve sang this song before, but it was a long time ago. Now, I’m taking you back, but adding something new… I’ll be seeing this song in French!”

Roger took another sip of his beer and nearly rolled his eyes at this annoyingly cheery Y/N. The lights dimmed, and the music began playing. “Des yeux qui font baisser les miens…” She sang, her eyes closed, and intently focusing on the music. “Un rire qui se perd sur sa bouche” Her voice was amazing and angelic, and Roger’s jaw nearly hit the floor. He was awestruck…

She walked across the stage gracefully, continuing to sing smoothly. The crowd would cheer every time she’d wink or a blow a kiss. She’d often smile and nearly laugh, but still managed to sing perfectly. Roger smiled to himself, admiring the way she confidently carried herself on stage. She knew she was good. He turned around to face the bartender as she was still singing.

“So… Tell me more about this Y/N…” Roger said, sneaking in a glance at you.

The bartender glanced up from pouring glasses at Roger. “Well, as you can see she’s amazing at singing… Her name is Y/N Y/L/N. She always finishes up the night, we can never get enough of her.”

“Has she ever thought of pursuing a career in singing? Has she tried?”

“Not that I know of, we’ve all tried to get her too. She’s just scared I think, but we all know she’d go places. Instead, she just works at some restaurant across the street.”

Roger turned back around to look at you, and realized you had finished the song. “Thanks for coming everyone, I’ll see you next week.” You said with a small wave.

You smiled to yourself as you felt you had the best performance yet. You were honestly really worried about how you’d do with the French version of La Vie En Rose, with only taking three years of it in high school. You walked into the makeshift backstage area and all the other weekly singers ran up to hug you.

“Y/N, you did so good, I’m so proud!” Said Lizzie, the host of the open mic night. She sang earlier too. “It was all so perfect and angelic… The outfit, the song, your voice…”

You laughed. “Thanks Lizzie, but we both know it was just a good performance. I have room for improvement.” Lizzie rolled her eyes.

You changed out of your dress into something more comfortable, just jeans and a floral shirt, with white tennis shoes. “Honestly Liz, the cold weather is killing me, I can hardly—“ You were interrupted by a tap on your shoulder. You turned around to be met with the face of a blonde man you vaguely recognized. It wasn’t a bad face though, you thought to yourself, His face was actually pretty nice…

Before you could say anything he introduced himself. “Hey. I’m Roger.” He said, giving you a charming smile.

“Oh um I’m Y/N!” You said, with a hint of awkwardness. “I don’t mean to be rude, but should you really be back here? It’s just—“

“No worries, I asked someone if I could come back here. I wanted to know if you’d like to get out of here with me.” You were a little concerned about this Roger guy. You knew his face from somewhere… And he was just so forward…

“Well I have to work tomorrow and it’s already late—“ You began, but were cut off by a scoff from Lizzie.

“She’d love to go! Between you and me, she really need unwind.”

“Holy shit Lizzie you—“ You whispered to her, only to be cut off again, but this time by Roger.

“Great! We can leave whenever you’re ready.” He said, and then abruptly left the room.

“Liz what hell! You can’t just force me on dates with random guys!”

“God Y/N, sometimes you’re so thick… Do you know who he is?” She rolled her eyes.

“Yeah, he just introduced himself as Roger!”

“As in Roger Taylor, the drummer of Queen?”

You paused for a moment, thinking about it. You listened to Queen quite often, how did you not realize he was the drummer? You sighed to yourself, and pinched the bridge of your nose in frustration.

“Well what the fuck am I supposed to do now Liz? He’s part of an internationally known band, probably has dated so many girls better than me, and I’m just—“

She put a hand on you reassuringly, “Y/N, you’re gonna be fine.”

You took a deep breath and grabbed your jacket. “You’re right, I just need to get through the night and not embarrass myself.”

You somewhat confidently walked out of the room, and entered the now almost empty bar. There were two girls at a table loudly laughing, the bartender, Drew, and then him. You weren’t as nervous before, but he sat there chatting up the bartender with a charming smile. You hated to admit how good he looked. You approached them with a nervous smile on your face, and gave them a little wave. “Hi Roger, so where are we gonna go then?”

Roger turned around to face you, and gave you a smile, “I don’t know it’s up to you really.” He said, not breaking eye contact with you, “But I was thinking we could go to another bar that’s open or back to the party and you can meet the rest of the band.”

You thought for a moment but decided you didn’t want to be partying right now. You were never a party person, always more reserved and avoided large crowds… “Not that that doesn’t sound fun… But I was thinking we could just go to Tiffany’s Diner down the road and get some milkshakes? They really do have the best milkshakes in the state of Washington, if not the west coast…”

“Best milkshakes in the state you say? Sounds tempting…” He thought, as you looked at him expectedly. “Alright, but I’m going to hold your words against you if you’re wrong…”

You grinned, and grabbed his hand, guiding him out of the bar.

The diner was practically empty, except for a trucker and two teenagers. It’s neon lights lit up the room, and the odd smell of grease filled the diner. You sat across from Roger in a booth, and talked as you waited for your milkshakes and fries. “So,” you said leaning closer on the table, “what do you think of Seattle so far?” You asked.

“It’s very umm…” He furrowed his brows, unsure of how to answer the question. “Wet.”

You laughed and shook your head. “That’s one way to describe it. I love it here though, I’ve grown up here and I don’t see myself ever leaving.” You said with a gentle smile on your face.

“What do you do for work?”

“Well… Right now I’m just a waitress at this high end restaurant… It’s no life-long career, but it pays the bills and the tips are big, so I really can’t complain.” You fiddled with the zipper of your bag. “A little birdie told me you’re a drummer in a world famous band then?”

“Yeah I am, have you heard our songs?”

“A few. They’re okay… Room for improvement.” You said jokingly with a grin on your face.

“Hey wipe that grin off of you face! We’re internationally known, I’ll have you know.What about you? Have you ever thought of pursuing a musical career? Your voice is bloody amazing.” Roger said looking at you.

You tucked your hair behind your ear, a nervous habit of yours. “Thanks but I don’t think I will. I’m not going to chase after a dream that will likely never come true. My mom taught be to realistic.” You were started to feel less nervous now, but it was intimidating to be alone with someone so good-looking and so famous. “You met my friend back at the bar, Lizzie, and she always tries to get me to sing at other places… But I’m happy where I’m at.”

There was silence for a second, but it was quickly interrupted by the waitress bringing your food. “Hey Y/N, another performance at the Blue Moon tonight, I assume. Replacing Liz I see, who’s this?”

“This is Roger, my new best friend, Lizzie got to be too annoying.” You chuckled.

“A strawberry milkshake, a chocolate milkshake, and fries. You kids enjoy!” She said.

“Thanks Carol!” You called after her. Roger was looking at you with a puzzling look. “What?” You frowned.

“Are you friends with just about everyone then?”

You laughed, shaking your head. “Just with the people around here, I suppose.”

“I’m not sure if I believe that.” He looked at the chocolate milkshake in front of him. “Now, we’re going to see if you’re a liar or not. The best milkshakes, huh?” Roger studied it for a moment before taking a sip. He shook his head not saying anything.

“Well? What’s the verdict?”

Roger grinned. “That’s a pretty damn good milkshake, Y/N.”

“See I told you! The strawberry is even better!” You said taking a sip of your own. “Try it!” You said pushing your own milkshake towards him.

After trying your strawberry milkshake he exclaimed, “Why didn’t you tell me before we ordered to get strawberry?”

“Your first experience with the best milkshakes needs to be decided by you!” You beamed, and he rolled his eyes.“You know, some people like to dip their fries in the their milkshake. Liz does that, it’s disgusting.” You said, nearly laughing remembering the time with Lizzie.

“That sounds… Aggressively American…” Roger said, a shocked yet disgusted look upon his face.

You and Roger drank your milkshakes and ate the fries (not at the same time, of course), while chatting and laughing at the same time. You don’t know why he made you laugh so much and how he made you comfortable in such little time. It was weird to think how famous he was, yet here he was, enjoying a milkshake with you in a small diner. Against your wishes, he paid for your little meal and left a hefty tip for the waitress, Carol.

You looked at the clock above the diner counter. “Holy crap, it’s 1 AM. I really should be getting home, I have work at 8 AM…” You sighed, putting your face in your hands.

Roger took your hands in his. “You should come with me to my next show, it’ll be great! I could even ask Freddie if you could sing a song!” He looked at you with an excited look on his face.

“Rog, that’s sweet but I could never. Performing in a bar full of people you know is one thing, but in front of thousands I don’t know? That’s crazy. The open mic nights are just a bit of fun, that’s all… I’ll have to see you perform some other night, but right now I’m up for a promotion at work and I really can’t miss my shift.”

“I get it…” Roger said, leaning on his arm. “How far do you live from here?”

You frowned at the odd question, but answered nonetheless. “About two miles, why?”

He stood up from the table, and stretched his hand out to you. “Cause I’m going to walk you home, that’s why. Lead the way, love.”

“Roger it’s pouring you can’t honestly think we’re going to-”

“Come on, then I still have an excuse to be around you.” You blushed a bit, grinning as you took his hand and stood up.

The rain had let up, but you figured you still be drenched by the time you made it home. As you walked outside, you could see the moon slightly peeking out behind the storm clouds. You walked down the damp streets of Seattle, arm in arm. It was cold enough to see your breaths when you spoke, but that just gave you more of a reason to stay close to Roger.

Right now, Roger was telling you about how crazy tour could get, all the parties, all the fans, and all the shows… It was really intimidating, and talking about the topic made you nervous… When Roger looked down at you, he saw the look on your face, and that said it all. He could tell you were kind of freaking out.

“What’re you thinking about right now?” He smiled at you as you walked. “You kind of have a funny look on your face…”

You took a deep breath in… “I just… I don’t know… Why me? I’m just some girl from Seattle nothing special or different-”

“I knew you were special from the moment I saw you on stage in that black dress. The way you carried yourself on stage… The way you interact with people and have all these friends… I’ve shamefully met a lot of girls on this tour, and none of them have been like you.”

You bursted out laughing, despite your attempts to keep it in. “What’s so funny?”

“I’m sorry everything you said is super sweet, and I appreciate it, I really do, but it’s just so sappy and cheesy.” You giggled.

“Hey! Don’t make fun of me, I meant what I said!” Roger said, slightly laughing himself. “Okay… Yeah… It was a little cheesy.”

“Rog…” You stopped walking. “You aren’t gonna just forget me like all of those other girls right?”

“Of course not, I never intended to.” He frowned.

You tried to hide your smile but you couldn’t. After one night, you sort of fell for this stupid boy with messy blonde hair. It was hard not to. You continued your walk, telling him the story of Lizzie shamelessly mentioning to everyone how well you could sing. You told him a lot of stories, too, and in turn Roger told a few tour stories and about his band.

“They really seem like fun, and they all sound lovely. I’d love to meet them sometime.” You said, beaming up at him.

Roger shook his head. “‘Lovely’ isn’t exactly how I’d describe them but… I’m sure they’d love to meet you, too.”

You stopped in front of your apartment building, both of you drenched, the hair sticking to both of your faces. “This is me, right here.” You gestured toward the building.

“I’ll be sure to take note of your address, send you some letters.”

“That’s sweet and all but wouldn’t it be easier if I just gave you my number?” You questioned, and he just nodded. You took a pen out and wrote your phone number down. “Be sure not to wash that off.”

You stood in front of your apartment building’s door. “I have to admit, I didn’t think I’d enjoy this night as much as I did. Thank you, Rog.”

“The pleasure was all mine.” He gave you a small wave.

The rain was starting to fall harder, and the street was dark except for a dim light. You waved, and took one last look at him before you pushed the door open and walked inside. You tried to shake the water out, and realized how could you were now. You were almost at the stairs when you heard a knock on the door, and you turned around to see Roger.

“Now what is it?” You said playfully, as you opened the door and stepped out in the rain to meet him.

“You forgot something” Roger said leaning close to you. He was a lot closer to you now, you could feel your heart beating in your chest, and your face burned. Luckily for you, your blushing was hidden by the darkness of the night.

You frowned trying to think what you forgot. “No, I don’t think so I got my purse right h-”

He interrupted you by grabbing your face, and resting your forehead against his. He kissed you softly, and the world fell away. It was slow and soft, comforting in ways that words never would be. His hand rested below your ear, his thumb caressing her cheek as their breaths mingled. You wrapped your arms around his neck, and he pulled you closer until there was no space left between them. You could feel the beating of his heart against your own chest.

You both slowly pulled away, both resting your forehead against one another’s. “Be sure to call me, okay?” You whispered, and he nodded. You gently kissed his cheek once more before breaking apart, still holding his hand as you walked toward the door. When you got far enough, your hands also broke apart, and he allowed it to fall to his side. You opened the door and finally went up to your apartment.

The clock on your nightstand read 2:38 AM, and you shook your head over how much time Roger had taken up. You had to wake up in five hours, but you were pretty sure you’d have trouble falling asleep. As you now laid in your bed, thinking about the night you met and spent with Roger, recounting every conversation, every smile, and every laugh… You knew that this was a night to remember forever.

[oscar-piastri]

what happens in Paris... [p.p]

a/n: hey guys! so i’m still struggling with writing, but I enjoy it so here I am again lol. i also wanna say that this one is very rushed and i wrote it in just an hour

masterlist 

quick summary: the reader and peter get lost in Paris (1.4k words)

“Stop moving! You’re taking all the blanket” you said as you struggled to keep the warm blanket on your body.

“No I’m not” you heard your friend Peter mumble as he took the blanket for himself, again. “And stop talking, I’m trying to sleep”

“Yeah, me too!” You said as you get out of the bed. Putting your hands on your waist, you looked at Peter, snuggled in the blanket and sighed.

You guys were on a field trip to France. Something went wrong when the school booked the hotels and it led to you and Peter in the same bed. In fact, your french teacher made a mistake and counted you in the boys floor, making you share a room with Peter.

Of course you protested, but the girls floor was full and without a bed for you. Peter and you eventually agreed to that and thought that it wouldn’t be that bad.

But yeah, it wasn’t great.

“Peter I swear I’ll fight you for that blanket!” you told him as you were trying to pull the blanket your way.

“Okay, okay stop! I’ll try to share it” Peter groaned as you put a satisfied smile, jumping on the bed.

The next morning, you found yourself waking up pretty early because, as you suspected, Peter stole the blanket that night.

God, you just wanted to push him out of the bed. But you decided to go take a shower instead.

You were now sitting at a table in the restaurant part of the hotel, with Ned, Peter and Michelle.

“What happened in your room? You guys were making a lot of noise” Ned asked you, making you choke on your breakfast

“W-What are you.. What do you mean?” Peter stammered, his cheeks slowly turning to red.

“Oh you mean when I almosted killed our dear Peter because he stole the blanket?” you replied with a forced smile on your face.

“Yeah, well in my defense, I get cold during the night AND you snore” Peter protested making Ned and Michelle laugh.

“You guys look like an old married couple” Michelle joked, making you stick your tongue out as an answer.

Paris. Such a beautiful city. Everything is beautiful about it, and the fact that you were finally visiting this city made you very happy and excited. You took out your phone and took pictures of pretty much everything, getting distracted by the architecture. “Oh shit!” you yelled when your phone turned itself off because your battery died.

You turned around to join back your group and was surprised to see that they weren’t here. They left. Without you. You tried to find them but you quickly lost hope.

“Yes Mr. Stark. I’ll be careful” you overheard someone over the phone. You looked around and noticed Peter, sitting on a bench, talking on the phone to someone. “Yea- Shoot I’ve gotta go, my phone is” was what you heard before Peter groaned loudly and you assumed that his battery died, too.

“Peter! Oh god I’m so glad you’re here!” You said, putting your hand on the chest as a sign of relief.

“Y/N of course I’m here! I’m here with…” Peter started to talk “with everyone else…. Who apparently, aren’t here anymore” he concluded, turning on himself to find the group.

“Yeah, I guess we got distracted and lost them..” you muttered, nervously playing with your fingers. Peter noticed it and took your hands in his

“We’re gonna be okay. Look I have an idea” Peter tried to reassure you and drag you with him towards some people. “Ur, désolé… Je… Amie.. perdu?” Peter asked a young woman, and you chuckled when Peter tried to speak french.

“Bonjour, désolée de vous déranger. Mon ami et moi sommes perdus, pouvez vous nous prêter votre téléphone s’il vous plaît?” you asked the woman, smiling.

The young woman gently smiled at you and give you her phone.

“What did you say? And since when do you speak french?” Peter whispered, looking surprised that you know french this good.

“I told her we were lost and asked for her phone” you told him as you handed him the phone. “Here, call Ned. I can’t even remember my own number so someone else’s is impossible for me” you explained to him.

Peter looked at you, furrowing his eyebrows “yeah well uh that’s the problem. I don’t know his phone number” he told you, biting his lips.

“You’re supposed to be the brain” you joked. You apologized to the woman and gave her back her phone.

“We should try and find them. If I remember, we were supposed to see the Eiffel Tower. We just need to follow the signs” he said with an optimistic smile.

You had no other choice than agreed to this, and to be honest and it was a brilliant idea. The two of you started to walk, still enjoying the beauty of this city.

After minutes, you were walking on a street full of luxury shops. The eiffel tower wasn’t that far and that made you smile. You were about to say something to Peter when you heard the alarm from a shop and saw people running away from it.

“Hey, they’re thieves!” Peter exclaimed. “Shit Y/N, stay here I’m coming back” he said in a hurry, before running after them but he surprised you when he started running in an alley that seemed deserted

“You’re stupid! Don’t leave me here alone we’re already lost and you’ll get hurt! And you’re going the wrong way you idiot!” You screamed at him but he was already gone.

After seconds, you saw a familiar person going from buildings to buildings with a web. You recognized Spider-Man right away. It probably took you a minute to understand the situation.

“No way… Peter?!” you asked yourself before covering your mouth with one hand as a sign of surprise.

You ran to the alley and waited for Peter, well Spider-Man to come back. And it only took minutes for Spider-Man to come back.

“Shit wow you scared me!” He said taking a step back and putting a hand on his chest.

You looked at the masked superhero and took a step towards him. And he didn’t move, he stayed, so you took more steps.

Once you were close enough, you put your hand on his mask and took it off, just to be face to face with Peter, as you expected.

“I can’t believe it was you… All along…” You said, not hiding your surprise

“Surprise!” He told you with a soft smile as you hugged him. “You found my secret”

“Well you didn’t really hide it, you were with me and the next second you’re not and Spider-Man appears in France” you told him giggling.

“Now you know my secret. You should tell one, you know… So that we could be even?” He asked with a smile.

You stayed silent for a few seconds before putting your hands on his cheeks. “I think my secret is that… I like you” you told him before putting your lips against his. You waited a few seconds before pulling away, smiling.

“I think I really like your secret” he said, putting his lips back on yours. The two of you giggled.

“Well, I should let you change, right? We don’t want everyone to see you like that” you told him, leaving the alley and waiting for him near a shop.

The two of you held hands while you were making your way to the Eiffel Tower.

“By the way, Y/N, what happens in Paris, stays in Paris, right?” Peter asked you shyly.

“Um what part? Your secret identity or us liking each other?” you asked him, already knowing the answer.

“Spider-Man” he said before looking at you. “I’d be an idiot to keep you as a secret. I want everyone to know that I liked you” he said kissing your forehead.

After a few minutes, you managed to get to the Tower and you were surprised when you found all of your friends there, the teacher looking all stressed talking to a police officer.

“Guys! Where were you? We tried to call. I was worried sick!” The teacher asked the two of you, trying to sound mad but you both knew she was relieved that you were both okay.

“We got lost” Peter said, making you giggle.

“What happens in Paris, stays in Paris” you whispered in Peter’s ear, making him smile.

[rpf-bat]

This Is The Best Day Ever

Pairing: Gerard Way x Reader

Genre: Fluff

Summary: Request fic for @shes-sweet-as-battery. “Are you taking requests? Cause it's my birthday tomorrow and I would love it if you wrote a story with Gerard, and it's the readers birthday and they spend the whole day together going places and being cute and then cuddling when they get home and yeah.”

A/N: Happy Birthday, friend!   

You woke up in your warm bed, feeling for your boyfriend, Gerard, beside you, but not finding him there.

Where could he have gone? you wondered sleepily, rubbing your eyes as you checked the time on your phone. It was still early. He shouldn’t have meetings with Reprise or anything at this hour.  Was he still in the apartment somewhere?

You stood up and slipped on your dressing gown, intending to go looking for him in the kitchen. Then, suddenly, your bedroom door opened, and the sound of your boyfriend’s  beautiful voice filled your ears.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!” Gerard sang boisterously. He must be on his third cup of coffee, at least, to have this much energy. “HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR Y/N! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!”

He pulled you close with one arm, greeting you with an affectionate kiss. You saw that in his other hand, he held a Starbucks bag.

“I got you your favorite drink,” he smiled. “And I was going to get you a muffin, but, then I figured, since it’s your special day, why not get a cake pop instead?”

“Cake for breakfast?” you raised your eyebrow.

“Why not?” Gerard chuckled. “Your birthday only comes around once a year, and I want to make it a special one.”

“This is definitely the most special way to start the day,” you agreed, taking the bag from Gerard and setting it down on your nightstand. With both of his hands now free, Gerard hugged you tight and kissed you again.

“What would you like to do today?” Gerard asked when he pulled away. “I told Craig and the guys I’m taking today off, so we can go anywhere you like.”

“Want to take a walk down the Sunset Strip?” you suggested. You’d moved out to California not too long ago, as Gerard’s band started to take off. You thought it would be fun to explore Los Angeles a little.

“Sounds good to me,” Gerard nodded. “You get dressed, I’ll be waiting in the car.”

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

About twenty minutes later, you and Gerard were walking, hand in hand, down the famous LA street. You spotted a trendy looking boutique.

“Want to go in?” Gerard asked. “I’ll buy you anything you like.”

“Oh, you don’t have to do that,” you said politely. It looked like an expensive sort of shop.

“Babe, I’m a rock star now,” Gerard laughed. “I can afford to buy you something nice now and then, it’s ok.”

True, you considered. Sometimes, you forgot that you weren’t broke kids in Jersey anymore. It was weird to think that Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge was making your humble boyfriend a millionaire. Fame hadn’t really made him act any different, but you supposed it did have an effect on what kind of places he was able to take you.

“Besides,” Gerard convinced, “you need something nice to wear to the place we’re going later.”

“Oh?” your eyes widened. “Where are you taking me, exactly?”

Gerard reddened. “I…..may have made a reservation at a five star restaurant,” he admitted. “I hope you don’t mind. Howard says it’s really good….”

“No, that’s awesome!” you said gratefully, hugging Gerard tightly. “Thank you, Gee!”

“Anything for you, my love,” Gerard whispered into your ear, and you resisted the urge to start macking on him in the middle of the street.

“Come on!” Gerard said, taking you by the hand and leading you into the shop. “Let’s pick something out!”

You eyed the racks of dresses, not sure what you would like.

“How about this one?” Gerard suggested, holding up a dress on a hanger. It was your favorite color, and it was just your size. Gerard knew you so well.

“I’ll try it on,” you decided, taking it from him and walking into a fitting room. A few minutes later, you walked back out in the dress, eyeing yourself in the mirror uncertainly.

“Y/N, holy shit,” Gerard swore, his eyes panning down your body lustily when he saw you. “You’re gorgeous.”

“Thank you,” you blushed.

“We’ll take it!” Gerard shouted to the sales girl. “She’s gonna wear it out!”

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Not long after that, you and Gerard arrived at the restaurant Howard had suggested. It was French, and unbelievably fancy. You wondered if you even belonged in a place like this.

“Oh my gosh, is that the guy from My Chemical Romance?” you heard someone whisper as the waiter walked you to your table.

It was starting to dawn on you how different Gerard’s life was becoming now that he’d signed with Reprise.

“Are you going to sign an autograph or something for that fan?” you asked Gerard discreetly.

“I don’t think so,” Gerard shook his head as the two of you sat down. “I mean, normally I would, but I want tonight to be all about you. I’m sorry my….work is getting in the way.”

“No, it’s fine,” you replied as you pulled out a menu. “You’re a celebrity now, it’s to be expected.”

“I do like that being a celebrity affords me the opportunity to give you all the nice things you deserve,” Gerard sighed, “but I don’t like the way it distracts me from being with you. Sometimes, I miss New Jersey, you know? Where nobody knew who I was, and we could just go places without it being a big deal.”

“Whereas now, I wouldn’t be surprised if the paparazzi showed up,” you frowned.

“I’m sorry,” Gerard winced. “But, listen, let’s not let it ruin our evening, ok? Order whatever you like.”

“You sure?” you hesitated. Celebrity or not, it seemed rude to order the most expensive thing on the menu when someone else was paying for your dinner.

“I’m sure,” Gerard smiled, looking at you lovingly. “I would give you anything in this world that you asked for. I love you.”

“I love you, too,” you said happily. Even though Gerard’s life was changing fast, the way you two felt about each other was always the same. Maybe you had nothing to worry about, after all.

“Speaking of giving you anything,” Gerard grinned, “I got something for you.” He pulled a small, wrapped box out of his coat pocket.

“Happy Birthday, Y/N,” he smiled, handing it to you.

“Oh, Gerard, you shouldn’t have,” you blushed, unraveling the sparkly ribbon.

“I couldn’t resist,” he shrugged. “When I saw it, I thought of you immediately.”

You opened the box and tossed aside the tissue paper to discover a glittering, bejeweled locket.

“Oh, Gerard, this is too much,” you gasped.

“Open it,” Gerard insisted.

You undid the clasp and saw that inside the locket, a small message was engraved: I’d end my days with you.

It was a quote from “Demolition Lovers”, a song he’d written for you two years ago, on his band’s first album.

“I had it custom-engraved,” Gerard explained. “So, it’s completely unique.”

“Thank you, Gerard,” you said, touched. “I’ll wear it every day.”

“Here, let me help you put it on,” Gerard said, rising from his seat and coming to stand behind your chair. He fastened the locket around your neck, taking the opportunity to dot a kiss on your cheek as he did so.

“Pardon me, monsieur,” the waiter cleared his throat. “We have brought the cake, as you requested.”

“Oops, sorry,” Gerard giggled, sitting back down.

“Cake?” you repeated.

“Oui, mademoiselle,” the waiter explained. “Your amoureux has ordered our finest gateau au chocolat, with, um, pink birthday candles.”

The waiter gestured to the well-lit, delicious-looking cake, which he had wheeled out on a small cart.

“Blow out the candles and make a wish, Y/N,” Gerard suggested.

“How can I wish for anything,” you smiled, close to happy tears, “when you’re already a dream come true?”

[truthlogicbeauty-blog]

Hamilton revolution

I wanted to see what all the shouting was about, so I got a ticket to the Hamilton revolution

What a shock, the best seats in New York were going for $829, if you could even get one, but the scalpers in NY are getting over $2000 from frenzied theater-goers.  So, I waited until it hit LA.  I was lucky, I got 2 center area tickets at regular price (not together) for only $1,120.00. That’s a high price to pay for a show without any famous stars, but I saved the plane fare, plus the weather here in LA is a bit better than in NY.

 “The musical Shot Heard ‘Round the World” has seemed to have started a new American Musical revolution with all the publicity it’s been receiving.  Okay, okay, did the show live up to all the hype it has been receiving? Well, not exactly, but just bear with me, this is a very ambitious and unusual show.

 I liked what I saw of Miranda’s first show In the Heights, which used mostly R&B and Salsa. But, Hamilton was pretty much Rap and Hip Hop.  The show had clever rhyming, but the lyrics in scrappy street rap really dropped the bar. I’m wasn’t aware that the colonies were also revolting against the king’s English:

 "ten-dollar Founding Father without a father"  “Man, when the British taxed our tea, we got frisky, Imagine what’s gon’ happen when you try to tax our whiskey”.

 Damn, you’re in worse shape than the national debt is in Sittin’ there useless as two shits Hey, turn around, bend over, I’ll show you Where my shoe fits

 I'm runnin' with the Sons of Liberty and I am lovin' it! See, that's what happens when you up against the ruffians We in the shit now, somebody's gotta shovel it! Hercules Mulligan, I need no introduction When you knock me down I get the fuck back up again!

 I can handle the profanity, getting down and dirty, taking off the gloves and white wigs, and the street gang rebels rapping against English rule.  Even if it at odds to the actual literate and scholarly style of our superstar founding fathers, which I think the show was trying to honor.  Look at Thomas Paine’s 47-page pamphlet Common Sense, if you want to see how eloquent the founding fathers were contrasted to this show’s street gang rap. Thomas Jefferson’s statements of human liberty and equality are a bit of an odd fit in this transition into street gang rap.  I’m just not so sure that “we hold these truths to be self-evident” communicated gang rap, slang, twitter, even emojis, always finds a new way to beauty and enlightenment?  So what, if it’s not classy or literate, a diversity of new styles can be fun.

 Miranda’s choice of putting his history lesson into kind of an oratorio style, where characters summarize the events and rarely ever interact with one another, doesn’t give us three dimensional protagonists that pull us into the story. Despite the incredible talent of the cast, the show’s constant rap beats like a stuck metronome.  The ensemble of dancers going on and off stage almost constantly, does give the story a sense of non-stop motion. Unfortunately, this history lesson in declamatory rap gets tedious as it recites with little dramatic variety or beauty. 

 The rap all seems very mechanical.  If only the cast could just step out their metered march and touch us with something real like “Molasses and rum” that was in the musical 1776.

 Molasses to rum to slaves 'Tisn't morals, 'tis money that saves Shall we dance to the sound Of the profitable pound In molasses and rum and slaves

'Tis Boston can boast To the West Indies coast "Jamaica, we brung what ye craves" Antigua, Barbados We brung Bibles and slaves

 Molasses to rum to slaves Who sail the ships back to Boston Laden with gold, see it gleam Whose fortunes are made In the triangle trade Hail slavery, the New England dream

 Also using Burr as Hamilton’s Judas/Javert is a bit of a red herring.   For the most part they worked together and even got along.  When Hamilton had his scandalous affair 1792 and Monroe challenged him to a duel, it was averted by none other than Aaron Burr.  The split came later when Hamilton supported Jefferson for president instead of Burr in the 1800 election.

 Hamilton doesn’t seem to celebrate winning the war for independence against Miranda’s foppish King George. Similarly, none of the major events in the recited history lesson seems to really catch fire, the company just talks about them.  Hamilton’s first act badly needs conflict and a real adversary to pull us into story. The war lasted for over 8 years and 1 out of every 20 able bodied Americans died fighting for our independence. Giving us Hamilton complaining about Washington’s field promotions is part of it, but the show needs to pull into the real battles, and America’s final victories.  

 The American Revolution ended when Britain and the infant United States won the war and they both signed the treaty of Paris. Hamilton’s Act I finale, in an anticlimax, as it ends with just talking about the Federalist papers.  These newspaper essays were hasty written in three or four a weeks to support New York’s ratification of the Constitution.  But by the time New York voted, it had already passed.  If this was the big event to get excited about and stand up and cheer at the end of act I, it was a bit of a yawn.

 Hamilton biggest problem is overlooking what our revolution was actually about. It forgets the Sons of Liberty’s mantra: "No taxation without representation". Hamilton changes the English colonies fight against taxes and the rule of England and to a conflict with immigrants and slaves against slavery.  This may resonate with some groups, but it’s not the true story of the British colonies war from English rule and Hamilton’s roll in the forging of our country.

 The Revolutionary war was not against slavery.  The founders accepted slavery as an institution.  George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin and James Madison were all slave holders.

Number of slaves each president owned. (CAPS indicate the president owned slaves while serving as the chief executive): [1] - GEORGE WASHINGTON (between 250-350 slaves) - THOMAS JEFFERSON (about 200) - JAMES MADISON (more than 100) - JAMES MONROE (about 75) - ANDREW JACKSON (fewer than 200) - Martin Van Buren (one) - William Henry Harrison (eleven) - JOHN TYLER (about 70) - JAMES POLK (about 25) - ZACHARY TAYLOR (fewer than 150) - Andrew Johnson (probably eight) - Ulysses S. Grant (probably five).

 Hamilton mother, Rachel Lavien lived with James Hamilton, a Scottish trader.  They lived on Nevis, an island in the British West Indies near St. Croix.  They had two sons, Peter and Alexander.  She lived with him for nearly fifteen years, even though she had not formally divorced her former husband.    When Alexander was ten years old, they moved to the island of St. Croix. Of the 24,000 residents on the island, 22,000 were slaves. They owned a dry goods store and 7 slaves.  After discovering that Rachel was still technically married to John Lavien, James Hamilton left Rachel and returned to Nevis and St. Kitts, leaving her and his two sons behind. To make matters worse, his mother died of severe illness, when Hamilton was only 13 years old.  Ironically, when his mother died, she left two slaves to her sons—one to James and the other to Alexander.  The sons never took possession of these slaves as the court held that since they were the illegitimate offspring of a fallen woman, they had no right of inheritance.

 Hamilton worked as a clerk for Beekman and Cruger Company in Christiansted on St. Croix.  The company traded sugar and African slaves with New England.  Hamilton recorded the arrivals of slaves from the Gold Coast of West Africa. They were, he reported, “very indifferent indeed, sickly and thin . . .” and commented on the bottom line, “they average about 30 [pounds sterling].”  Hamilton’s excelled in his position and ran the company when the firm’s owner was absent at sea. 

 In 1780, Hamilton married Elizabeth Schuyler, from a prominent New York slaveholding family. He bought for his in-laws "2 negro servants" from N. Low for $250 in 1796 according to Hamilton's own expense book.  Hamilton deducted $225 from Church's account on 29 May 1797 for the purchase of "a Negro Woman and Child.  Although Hamilton was not an advocate of slavery and did not own slaves himself, opposing slavery was never at the forefront of his agenda.

 The Revolutionary War:  Here’s the long and short of it!  It began as a conflict between Great Britain and her Thirteen Colonies. The British were overtaxing American colonies pay for Britain’s war debt from the French and Indian War.  They revolted and declared their independence as the United States of America and the fight began.  We formed a militia, drove the British out and formed our own government

 [HAMILTON] You have your orders now, go, man, go! And so the American experiment begins With my friends all scattered to the winds Laurens is in South Carolina, redefining brav’ry [HAMILTON/LAURENS] We’ll never be free until we end slavery! [HAMILTON] When we finally drive the British away

[LAURENS] Black and white soldiers wonder alike if this really means freedom

Slavery and indentured servants within England was pretty done at that time in England, and it was outlawed in 1772.  It was abolished in all British colonies in 1833.  But, the colonies had slavery both before the war for independence and long after.  My gosh, even in the Declaration of Independence, the delegates had Jefferson cross out the antislavery clause in the Declaration:

 “He (king George) has waged cruel war against human nature itself, violating its most sacred rights of life and liberty in the persons of a distant people who never offended him, captivating and carrying them into slavery in another hemisphere or to incur miserable death in their transportation thither.  This piratical warfare, the opprobrium of infidel powers, is the warfare of the Christian King of Great Britain.  Determined to keep open a market where Men should be bought and sold, he has prostituted his negative for suppressing every legislative attempt to prohibit or restrain this execrable commerce.

 Slavery was also implicitly permitted in the Constitution through the Three-Fifths Compromise, which detailed how each slave state's enslaved population would be factored for apportioning seats in the United States House of Representatives and direct taxes among the states. Slavery wasn’t abolished until the 13th amendment 100 years after the war for independence.

  [LAURENS] They'll tell the story of tonight [ELIZA] "On Tuesday, the twenty-seventh, Lieutenant Colonel John Laurens was killed in a gunfight against British troops in South Carolina. These troops had not yet received word from Yorktown that the war was over. He's buried here until his family can send for his remains. As you may know, Lieutenant Colonel Laurens was engaged in recruiting three thousand men for the first all-black military regiment. 

The surviving members of this regiment have been returned to their masters."

[LAURENS] Tomorrow there'll be more of us

 However, England’s Lord Dunmore In November 1775, promised freedom to all the slaves and indentured servants of revolutionaries who would take up arms and fight for “His Majesty’s crown and dignity.”  Most believed that victory by the British would lead to the end of their slavery. Slaves rushed to Norfolk to join “Lord Dunmore’s Regiment.” Across the chest of each black soldier appeared the words “Liberty to Slaves”.  

 By the end of the war, from 20,000 to 100,000 enslaved blacks—as many as one in five enslaved Africans from all 13 states including George Washington’s own slave Harry, ran to the combined British-black army.  Washington had refused to accept slaves into the official Continental Army.  Lord Dunmore’s proclamation prompted Washington in 1777 to reversed his decision barring free blacks.  

 Roughly a year later, enough slaves in Rhode Island—were promised freedom in exchange for military service—enlisted to fill two battalions.  For South Carolina and Georgia, it was a different story. Even with increasing pressure from Congress for additional manpower, those colonies would not arm slaves.  If the use of slaves in the battles is to be an important element in Hamilton, it shouldn’t be half told.  

King George defeated France in the Seven Years' War, becoming the dominant European power in North America and India. George wanted to "keep the rebels harassed, anxious, and poor, until the day when, discontent and disappointment were converted into penitence and remorse”.  That’s the bully that should be the show’s bad guy. But this show makes King George into a foppish preening drag for a few laughs, who just thinks the Colonists are just being very bad boys. Moreover, he’s always all alone without any solders, not menacing at all.  This takes away any real drama from the battle. Also being British he gets a Beetles style song.

 With all this show’s supposed diversity, what’s with the “single” white casting of King George?    How come only a white guy get to play the bad guy?  The original casting call specifying “NON-WHITE men and women” actors (later amended) for ongoing and future productions of the show. Lin-Manuel Miranda: “It is essential to the storytelling of Hamilton that the principal roles — which were written for non-white characters, excepting King George.

 L-MM “There are only 3 roles specifically designated for Hispanic actors on Broadway: Paul San Marco in A CHORUS LINE, Bernardo in West Side Story, and Cervantes in Man of La Mancha.”  “I don’t dance well enough to play Bernardo [West Side Story], or Paul in The Chorus Line. And I don’t have enough of an operatic voice to play the Man of La Mancha. And if you’re a Latino man, that’s all you get.” The idea has always been to look the way America looks now, so it doesn’t exclude anyone.” ‘Hamilton’ is a story very deliberately told to reflect what America looks like right now. We have every color represented …”.

 While I applaud making more minority casting for shows, excluding all whites, except for King George, is not how America really looks right now.  African Americans are 12%, Hispanic and Latino 18%, native is 1%, and white make up 61%. At the dawn of the American Revolution, 20 percent of the population in the thirteen colonies was of African descent. The first official United States Census taken in 1790 showed that only eight percent of the black populace was free.  If L-MM had to include slaves in the story, how would they be cast?  In Hamilton all the main characters are being played by people of color, but there are no historical people of color find a place in Hamilton’s narrative.   Washington had hundreds of slaves, why pretend they aren’t there?  While I applaud L-MM being race conscious, I would prefer the show to be colorblind, instead of excluding white performers.  

 The tedious uninvolving story and lack of excitement were only one of the show’s problem.  Fatigue was another.  “Hamilton” has 3 to 4 times more words in the show than most musicals. Lin-Manuel Miranda explained, in an interview , that it would be impossible to tell Hamilton’s story at the pace of a conventional musical.

  L-MM, “It would have to be 12 hours long, because the amount of words on the bars when you’re writing a typical song — that’s maybe got 10 words per line,” he said. “Whereas here we can cram all this shit in all the margins.”

 A total of 20,520 words are crammed into Hamilton's two hour and 23 minutes if Hamilton were sung at the same pace of other shows it would run somewhere between four and six hours.  

 Show                            Total words

Hamilton                         20,520

Spring Awaking                4,709

Phantom of the Opera      6,789  

Company                          5,085

1776                                 2,735

Candide                            5,616      

Oklahoma!                        4,303

Pirates of Penzance         5,962

 Sometimes more words are, well, is just more words, unless you have something new to say.  This is what contributes to Hamilton’s verbal overload. One wonders with almost 3 hours running time L-MM needed so much filler for the room where it happened.

 [Thomas Jefferson and James Madison] and an immigrant* [Hamilton]

*Why is Hamilton treated like an Ellis Island immigrant?  He is an American and qualified to run for President.  When the new Constitution was adopted: Article II, Section 1, specifies: No Person except a natural born Citizen, or a Citizen of the United States, at the time of the Adoption of this Constitution, shall be eligible to the Office of President;

 Two Virginians

walk into a room

 Diametric’ly opposed, foes

They emerge with a compromise, having opened doors that were

Previously closed

Bros

The immigrant emerges with unprecedented financial power

A system he can shape however he wants

The Virginians emerge with the nation’s capital

And here’s the piece de resistance:

[BURR] No one else was in The room where it happened The room where it happened The room where it happened No one else was in The room where it happened The room where it happened The room where it happened No one really knows how the game is played The art of the trade How the sausage gets made We just assume that it happens But no one else is in The room where it happens The room where it happens….*

*“The room where it happens” lyric is repeated many, many more times—I just didn’t print them all.

I suppose a weak lyric is better than nothing, and if you just keep repeating it long enough and then add a banjo to the hip-hop mix, it’s going to end up golden.

And why does the shoe need a number about Burr’s bitching that he wasn’t in the room where it happened anyway?  He wouldn’t have been invited to the room where it happened for the June congressional dinner meeting as NY state’s attorney general. Burr didn’t make it to Congress until 1791.  Miranda creates the dinner party diplomacy in Burr's imagination.  Why not show the sausage actually being made in congress where it was passed, instead of all this imaginary verbal repetition?  

 Central to the compromise was a bargain where southerners agreed to change their votes and support if Congress would relocate the capital city of the United States after a ten-year temporary residence at Philadelphia. This carried the strong implication that the North would not raise serious objections to the institution of slavery, since the capital would now be located on the Potomac in two slave states, Maryland and Virginia.

 Three key Southerners -- George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, and James Madison -- finagled locating the national capital, Washington, DC, in slave territory. The capital started out in New York City, in a free state, then moved to Philadelphia. But in Philadelphia a slave-owner could only keep a slave for six months before freeing him, unless he was temporarily sent into slave territory, which was inconvenient to the owner. The founders set aside land around a slave town, Alexandria, Virginia, to serve as the capital of the new nation.

 Sondheim’s song Someone in a tree in Pacific Overtures comes to mind, where no one knows what happened in the treaty house. The old man and the boy report what they’ve seen from a tree, and the soldier hiding under the floorboards reports what he’s heard. Sondheim gives it from three points of view and this song is brilliant.

 "The World Turned Upside Down" is an old 1640’s English ballad protesting against the policies of Parliament relating to the celebration of Christmas.

 In the surrender of British troops, article 3 stated that: "the garrison of York will march out to a place to be appointed in front of the posts, at two o’clock precisely, with shouldered arms, colors cased, and drums beating a British or German march. There was no historical record of song or songs were played by the band. The account of it being that song was added to the historical record almost a100 years after the event.

 This show also lacks memorable melodies.  I not asking for Che gelida manina, but couldn’t Hamilton step out of the rapped history lesson and give us some real emotion, about what he feels about the Nation he’s building or maybe even a love song?  Moreover, if it had a beautiful song, or melody, to soften the monotonous beat of this show. Usually most shows have at least one standout musical theme that rises above the rest, Beauty and the Beast’s “Tale as old as time…”, Les Miz’s “One more day…”, Evita’s “Don’t cry…”, and I can’t think of it, but Hello Dolly may even have one.  

 I didn’t find myself humming anything from the show as I was leaving.  But the show did have one catchy recurring leitmotif “Not throwing away my shot” that pervades the show. I was very confused what that lyric was all about.  

 Hamilton:

I am not throwing away my shot I am not throwing away my shot Hey yo, I’m just like my country I’m young, scrappy and hungry And I’m not throwing away my shot

 But when it finally comes time to duel with Burr and his shot, Hamilton sings,

“If I shoot first and throw it away He has to yield.”  “We both get to live another day” “I know this puts me in a difficult spot, but I’ve got to throw away my shot.

 Hamilton wrote a note, entitled “Statement of Impending Duel with Aaron Burr,” stating he would “throw away my first fire [shot].”  Indeed, Hamilton does throw away his shot.  And he was fatally wrong about Burr yielding and both of them living another day.  Hamilton did throw away his shot!  This lame and recurring lyric “I am not throwing away my shot, needs to be changed.    

 At the end of the first act, I simply just got tired of the long monotonous rapped history lesson. The prospect of the second act done much in the same manor dealing with Hamilton’s establishment of our national bank, foreign and domestic debt, and the U S Mint, seemed even more tedious, so I bailed at intermission.

 Oddly, Hamilton’s version of our history gave me little stand up and cheer about.  But, when they dimmed the lights, the audience went crazy and most had never seen the show.  I can’t believe this show with a single wooden balcony set devoid of any effects except a turntable and some chairs costs any more to produce than shows like Les Misérables, Wicked, Miss Saigon, or Phantom of the Opera.  But with all the show’s hype, and the money they were charging, the story of the Emperor’s new clothes did come to mind.  Charging thousands of dollars with a B list cast on an essentially bare stage, would be a tough sell even for Bernie Madoff.  

 Hamilton, one of the great founding fathers, in addition to being instrumental in the war for America’s independence, was the author of America’s economic policies and the architect of our financial and banking system. Hamilton’s gravestone said, “The PATRIOT of incorruptible INTEGRITY/The SOLDIER of approved VALOUR/The STATESMAN of consummate WISDOM.”  

 Hamilton’s brilliant accomplishment’s in the forging of our country needs to make us stand up and cheer, but the show’s lack of excitement and tedious rhythmic droning just holds it back.  The show’s semi-dramatic dialogue in a metronomic slog fails to muster up much excitement, but at least the dancers being onstage did give the story some sense of motion.  

 But my biggest problem with Hamilton was my failure to understand just why on earth they were charging us thousands of dollars to see it. The second one was setting this history in a metered rap using a chorus to show emotions and personalities with little theatrical interaction between them.  The constant rap rhythm made it feel like the cast were just reciting and chanting the events to me, in choregraphed patterns, not really bringing them to life. If Lin-Manuel Miranda could also have gotten the history right, it would have also made for a much better show.  

 I am not putting Lin-Manuel Miranda abilities down, as he one of the brightest new lights in the theater.  Listen to 'Evolution of Lin-Manuel Miranda', a soulful celebration of Lin's groundbreaking musical creations! https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=381&v=6PGV_p4iPiE  

The music, harmonies, the transitions, are an inspiration.

 I can hardly wait for his next show. I’m sure it will easily surpass this dramatically flat and tedious street gang rapped, “We in the shit now, somebody's gotta shovel it!”, tableau on Alexander Hamilton’s importance in American history.    

 Peace,

Bob Main

[pleasetrytoforget]

Dude I ate that roll that was soaking in air freshener and my burps tastes like 'desert jasmine' scent now

Why did I just get a protein style burger from in n out (shoutout to the coppa who paid for my food bc I have a money-spending addiction but now I'm too broke for my own spoiled good) and why do I claim that I try to eat healthy if I ingest a yeast roll that had just been soaking up the fumes of a highly chemically soaked "California Scents assainissuer d'air pour la voiture" and pardon my French, i-don't-speak-Spanish-Japanese-or-French fluently but I know a lil bit of 'em all and all I've learned is that English is really fucking hard but it's a super dope language and it's a Romance language which is awesome because romance makes me think of love which is what makes the world go round but like why do all the words that English stole and "claimed as their own" from the other Romance languages just sound like shittier, less pretty words that don't seem to roll of the tongue as well? Because "The US of A" has officially ruined everything it's touched since it began its existence so many, many, many years ago. And back when we were a 'real' "democracy" (Latin word meaning specifically "of the people") where people (not everyone, but certain individuals) had the right to vote for who they wanted in power. And, now that the world and the human population has grown and evolved with technology and shit like that, the United States of America has grown, too. To a superpower actually. Some might say the most powerful superpower, based on our emphasis on our 'great' nation's military. But with all of that military and with all of this war and violence going on in the world, let alone within our country and on our country's streets, it terrifies me that our country is still in a massive debt to other countries in the world. Granted, our debt is mostly to our "allies" (don't quote me on that, but I sure hope that's the case for the sake of the U.S.) but I don't like the idea of a racist, sexist, homophobic, rich-bitch, piece-of-shit, son-of-another-rich-bitch, and so on and so forth, that I like to call the Real donald trump. But I don't know enough about politics yet to legitimately argue any of these points, I just know that we need more LOVE in the world and then the Whole-Wide-World will spin a little easier because this loving planet will adjust to the absolute shenanigans that I like to call a nice combo of rapid self-awareness and a rapidly changing population (the whole entire human population of this planet) which equates, more simply, to LIFE and the FACTS of life. What's a fact of life? Death. What makes death inevitable? Lack of money. What fuels hate? Money. What is our "superpower-of-a-country" seriously lacking rn, in terms of national debt as compared to other countries' levels of military power/enthusiasm and violence history/capacity since we began as a 'free country' (isn't it sad that "this is a free country!!" is now an outdated phrase because all of our supposed 'rights' are drastically limited now-a-days?) back on September 17th, 1787, when the US Constitution was signed. After the American Revolution was won in 1783. Yet, that was after we declared our independence from the English (the supposed "enemy" at the time) with the Declaration of Independence, which had it's final text approved by Congress on (none-other-than-the-FAMOUSLY-celebrated) July 4th in the year of 1776. When we were supposedly already a "free country" in terms of being independent from the English. Yet, we weren't really independent from them until we defeated them in the Revolutionary War with our 'awesomely' supported military. I'm all for respecting those who fight for our nation's rights, from law enforcement to any branch of the military, including volunteers and the Reserves. However, I feel that our country has immensely grown and evolved, in some ways good, and in some ways bad, but what our egocentrism/ethnocentrism fails to let us 'die-hard' Americans realize is that our country is no longer free. We are not a free nation. We are chained down by national debt. We are not all that we could be- a beautiful melting pot/salad bowl/whatever-you-want-to/call-it of a nation- where so many kinds of people (could be) living in harmony but we restrict ourselves with so much hate and ignorance, and the wrong kind of love. I'm talking about the wrong kind of love as in the love for religion, power, and money; the 3 things that, in my opinion, destroy the very concept of love itself. Love is meant to come from no other place than a place of compassion and empathy and understanding. The 3 things that I believe our modernized society here in this wonderful country of ours has ruined us as a whole. If orange is the new black and orange is the new fascism, then we're on trend to have the blackness of death and devastation start another world war- a potentially more-devastating war than any war this world has ever seen in the past (shoutout to modern technological advances). I'm just scared rn, that's all I'm trying to say. Not trying to choose any side of anything because I know I'm not educated enough in politics or political science or psychology of philosophy or anthropology or physiological biology or child development or statistics or physics or anything of that nature to make any completely valid, fallacy-free arguments at this point in time, but let's just say I'm heated. I'm heated as fuck. Just like Mother Nature. Our founding fathers must be tossing and turning in their shallow graves right about now. It's time to raise above all of this fake, untrue love, and find some REAL LOVE, the love for one another, regardless of any past, present, or future discriminatory factor. Humans are the only living beings that we can really tell have emotions and feelings and a moral sense of right and wrong. We have the capacity to change Our Earth and ourselves to be better as a whole. We just have to find that love and come together. But with the aforementioned love of religion, money, and power, it seems like it's gonna take our human race a while to figure that out. I just hope it happens soon. And, remember, "the power of the people is stronger than the people in power." Stay true and real for yourself, stay strong for yourself and your family, and stand your ground for yourself and your family and your friends and your ultimate survival 'in this increasingly mad and dangerous world.' Goodnight, now. Let's try coming together to make some real love and make some real art together instead of making real hate and real war and real ignorance and real violence. I can't honestly say that that's NEVER the answer, because sometimes genuine force needs to be used against other forces of genuine evil, but it's not the answer for this point in history and of human evolution. This world needs love. I need love. I want love. Don't we all? Thank the Lawd I at least love myself enough to want to stay alive from this point on until the day I leave this life, whenever that may be. "Be good or be good at it." Thanks for that beautiful quote, my beloved YMCMB mentor, Lil' Wayne. Oh, and speaking of mentors and intelligence and evolution and pop culture and the evolution of pop culture in Modern American society, I've thought of the perfect quote to end this rant: "...and NOT having money is the root of all evil." Thanks for that one, too, Weezy. Btw how's your lung cancer? One of the current leading causes of death in America? On the same list that lists Suicide or Death by Intentional Harm as one of the leading causes of death in America, according to the oh-so-perfectly accurate U.S. Census? Aight, cool. Thanks for tuning in to my nightly rant. Tonight's was brought to you by none other than addy, my day-one, long-time-favorite prescription to simultaneously intentionally and unintentionally abuse. Thanks for that one, FDA!! Props to you for building a psychiatric field that believes in diagnosing confused, 'problem' children with illnesses and 'diseases' that require fixing with a legal form of amphetamine. Okay, that's enough. I should go take my sleeping pills so I can sleep through the night tonight. Goodbye, for real this time. Btw my in n out from over an hour ago has been sitting out since I started writing this and is now cold. I guess that's okay since there's no buns on this burger. That sounds like a catch phrase for a modern superwoman who fights against fast food corporations while also not being pop cultures current idea of 'beauty'... ha ha, "Nice try, but there's no buns on this burger!!!" A quote from America's next top superhero: Super-flat-ass-Woman. Oooooooh lessgo!!!!