#and because i don't like doing it to people who dont reciprocate with the same humour

[wife]

stressing about the same shit i always do when will it end

[yennas-stuff]

There’s this one e/riel who recently said “azriel was loyal to the mor for hundreds of years and he hadn't even gotten confirmation she liked him back so what makes y'all think he's about to be giving up on elain anytime soon Imfao” and then another one replied “And that man is evidently more down bad for Elain than he ever was with Mor so imagine at least another 500+ years of yearning for Elain. He physically can't stay away”

Rhys asked Azriel about Mor and wasn’t able to respond. Didn’t tell Rhys that he doesn’t love her anymore, doesn’t have feelings for her anymore, or is starting to get over her, and I think that’s why Rhys acted the way he did, because Azriel wasn’t able to give an answer, but if Az did give off the slightest hint of having genuine feelings for Elain then Rhys would’ve acted differently and likely would’ve told Az to wait for Elain to break the mating bond with Lucien or to be patient. And Azriel being “evidently more down bad for Elain than he ever was with Mor” is so funny to me. All we got with Az & Elain in his chapter was lust and jealousy when Sarah could’ve put something that showed romantic interest (genuine feelings) but didn’t. It would’ve been easy for her to do so. Lust doesn’t mean love. Sexual attraction isn’t that deep. There’s nothing wrong with the sexual attraction, but him not being able to plan beyond his fantasies and his self loathing toward himself wasn’t okay. That’s the problem I and others have. How he talked about himself was very unhealthy. There were actually people who did ship e/riel but stopped after reading the bonus chapter/acosf, and that’s saying something.

If Mor showed the slightest interest in Azriel or told him she wanted to be with him, then I 100% believe he would leave Elain for Mor. I don’t think he’s completely over Mor, but I do think he’s slowly starting to move on from her and has accepted that it’s never going to happen, and Elain is his rebound just like he is Elain’s rebound for Graysen. I think Az is jealous because everyone around him is getting into relationships/mates and is becoming happy. Rhys says in the third book that Az spent years waiting for a mating bond to snap between him and Mor. He wants a mate and is jealous because he doesn’t have one.

Lovely Anon, agreed 10000%. Thank you for the message. Great points were made.

I think Azriel just latches on to something he considers a pure and perfect embodiment of femininity. Maybe I am reading into it too much, but I don't really think it was love he felt for Mor. I think it was a combination of lust and platonic love. I think he wants to feel some of that purity and perfection, for it to rid him of his *sins* or wrongdoings.

If a female like that loved him, it would mean that he is good. But at the same time, he feels as if his touch was taking away some of that purity he assigned to Mor or Elain. We don't need to even get into it to know it's not healthy.

Also, I've never felt like him being down bad for 500 years was romantic or a good thing. It was not reciprocated or appreciated by Mor. It seems very self-destructive. At some point you need to actively look for happiness somewhere else. And I dont see him being more down bad for Elain than for Mor. Its been just a year and he's been avoiding her. With Mor he actually spent time with her. And as you wrote, he waited because he wants a MATE. He is so laserfocused on that. He doesn't even entertain pursuing anyone without thinking about bonds. Even when he knows that Elain already has one. He still thinks about it instead of how he feels ABOUT HER as a person. Just about having sex with her, which we know... means nothing (Nesta in the beginning of acosf).

We could get some deep loving words from Azriel about Elain when he was talking with Rhys but alas...

His mate obsession just shifted from Mor to Elain. But he knows she's already taken, which makes it impossible and more painful for him, which he probably thinks he deserves. Sad.

How sad it would be to always have this 3rd person in your relationship (Lucien)? He would probably think about him way too much and let these bad thoughts brew. Comparing himself and whatnot.

I hope he finds his happiness when he least expects it, he he. 💖 And for him to learn how true love feels. With no space for these self-deprecating feelings.

(These are just some thoughts my bestie, and I shared about Azriel and his state of mind. We might be talking crap, so if you don't agree, Im open to hear you all out).

[blessedarethebinarybreakers]

hi i just wanted to say, thank you very much for all of your posts and perspectives on the church hurt tags, it's very validating. the religious people around me are always pushing me to physically go to church and I've always been reluctant to despite feeling like im much closer to my faith and God as my best friend lately (all thanks to the numerous queer affirming religious blogs on tumblr btw!) and it's because of all the disagreement i have with the church and what they teach here (i live in a conservatively religious country where even supporting the queer community is frowned upon)

it makes me feel incredibly guilty that i don't feel the desire to go. not to mention, another reason is i work 6 days a week and also an introvert with not that many spoons and so i dont quite have the energy to go because sunday is the only day i get to recharge. but everytime i think about these reasons, i feel guilty as if im making excuses and that im just lazy, I can't never tell which is the truth and that only adds to my guilt.

everytime someone tells me to go to church, i long to find one where i am accepted for who i am, a place where i dont have to be afraid to be myself, a place that doesn't teach outdated beliefs that doesn't resonate with me. i long to feel the desire to go and to sing worship.

and at the same time, for me, worship and my faith lies in the small things that i do everyday, like looking at the sky and admiring the clouds, sending a quick prayer of thanks when the light turns back on after a blackout, enjoying the food that God has given me, listening to music on my way home to work, scrolling through affirming blogs and crying at the amount of compassion shown to me. but it feels like everyone says that's not enough, that we need to diligently attend church to truly be a christian but i just.. cant? which is shameful for me to admit.

im sorry this got long and became a sad rant but just, thank you for having that tag i really appreciate it, I've always been afraid to verbalize all of this thought because im afraid of being judged and being told the opposite but your posts have all been very helpful

Hey anon, I'm sorry the people around you are pressuring you to go to church, rather than doing any work to make the churches around you somewhere you could actually find spiritual flourishing. You deserve spaces where you can worship in community, but when those spaces don't exist, that is never your fault.

We can honor the sabbath in myriad ways: God's instruction to the first of humanity was not "go to church" but simply "rest," one day a week. If church is not a place you can rest in God's love, seek that rest elsewhere.

I pray that guilt will release its hold on you, that you can continue to find God in the small things, and comfort in knowing that the Divine Spirit blows wherever She will — outside church walls as much as inside them.

And I pray that you will find community that supports and celebrates you exactly as you are, whether it's among Christians or elsewhere, in person or online. We are communal creatures, created for relationship. Again, it is not your fault when others fail to extend a fully loving and reciprocal relationship to you; it is just my prayer that God will guide you towards those who can be that for you, and you for them. In the meantime, God Themself is as you say your best friend, holding you close through all things. <3

[mysicklove]

Thinking about yandere Sukuna who will let you do anything to him no matter how disgusting or humiliating it is. At first it’s reluctant because he just wants to please you but soon he starts to crave it.

Tbh I’d have Sukuna be my little malewife who cooks and cleans for me too. I think he’d be an amazing chef and love feeding you!

this makes me want to kiss u on the mouth, bc might have read my rules and how I feel on feederism. RAHHH ILY ANON. but anyways, i didn't interpret it as that so dont worry lovely.

but omg yessss. he gets so desperate for you to love him, his pride comes crumbling in front of you. its quite endearing, bc with other people he is still a stone cold bastard, and goes out of his way to establish his power, but with you, he is reduced to a puppy. it wasnt always like this, of course, but as he fell more and more in love with you, he realized how badly he craved your approval, affection even. and you never seemed to reciprocate it, no matter how hard he tried.

so now he seems to worship the ground you walk on, holding a throne next to his own open for when you finally choose to accept him. you don't make it easy on him, calling him for useless things, and demanding he treat you with the utmost respect. but he never complains, afraid you'll get upset with him.

so, on many days he finds himself cooking for you, twitching with excitement for what you'll say to him. every time it's done up to your standards, and he stares you down with each bite, until he hears the simple words, "taste good." and he's gulping, pretending that he is not vibrating with joy.

on others, you dump it on the floor, just to see his reaction. the way his eyes travel to the floor, wide in confusion. the way you push him to his knees with a stern, "it's gross. you eat it."

it makes him frantic because you liked it last week. he didn't change the recipe, why do you not like it? everything was the exact same. "but I— "

"lick it up Sukuna. from the floor, like the bitch you are."

and he nods at you, hoping that if he listens to you, you'll finally accept him, finally be his after all of the work he is putting into courting you. so he plants his hands on the floor and licks at the ruined food he had spent hours on, while you laugh at him.

[frankingsteinery]

(for the ask game from a few days ago) could you do Victor for 2, 12, 15 and 24

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

i had to sit and think because this one was so hard to narrow down. on a surface level i find all sorts of things about him endearing from his mannerisms to his speech patterns, but i think the thing that got me hooked on victor as a character was how emotionally demonstrative he is, particularly for a male protagonist. this also extends generally to his love for nature, for his friends, and his siblings (disregarding the incestuous implications of his relationship with elizabeth...)

i think this was only intensified for me when i started delving into frankenstein academic essays and analysis and then, by extension, the frankenstein fandom, and found that en masse it was people criticizing victor for just what interested me to him in the first place: being emotional, and therefore somehow melodramatic, overreacting, self-centered, egotistical, etc. it was this kind of climate of victor-hate that pushed me to make a tumblr account in the first place. someone had to be the sole victor defender in this barren wasteland

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

this is silly and probably not the serious answer you were looking for but like 2 years ago a dear friend of mine and i were joking about how you could catch victor frankenstein in a mouse trap and ever since then his assigned fursona in my head has been a mouse:

15. What's your favorite ship for this character?

by far its waltonstein (robert x victor). im aware clervalstein is vastly more popular, and while im charmed by it in-canon i dont find most depictions of it to my taste. i don't see their relationship as wholly reciprocated–one-sided on walton's end–which is part of the reason why i like their dynamic so much: its established that walton romanticizes the unobtainable, chases the unknown, and that's why he hangs all his hopes on things he cannot feasibly reach. first becoming a famous poet and going down with the greats, then sailing to find the northern passage despite being an inexperienced captain, all the while hoping for this impossibly idealistic image of a companion who would be perfectly tailored to his interests and manners, and then, against all reason, he finds this in victor, wherein victor becomes an extension of this habit, who is dying and too hung up in the past and on martyring himself, because everyone who has grown close to him has been hurt for it, so he cannot love again, or at least in the way walton wants. yet victor still has a reciprocated interest and finds a friend in him, even shares the same sentiment of the importance of friendship, but like he says no man can "be to him as clerval was." its very much wrong place/time but the right person.

ive said this before but i think, too, that if victor had recovered and lived than walton may fall a little less in love with victor. their relationship was founded on their dynamic of sick/caretaker, and beyond that, victor would have already exhausted his story, so there's no air of mystery around him anymore–nothing for walton to glorify or romanticize. ultimately i think even if they had the best of intentions and loved each other, they could not have a healthy or fully mutual relationship, and part of the appeal to me is this tragedy!

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?

im drawing a bit of a blank on this one because no other character encompasses just what victor Is to me, but theres a whole host of victor-esque characters i could name because he is the literal foundation for the mad scientist archetype. if i was pressed i think id say geoffrey tempest from sorrows of satan by marie corelli (beyond his blatant misogny), and i remember some parts of emil sinclairs early narration in demian by herman hesse reminded me of victor. lucifer/satan from paradise lost also, particuarly the bit where he says he cannot enjoy the beauty of earth for the suffering of his fall, but that almost feels like a cop-out answer.

lastly–and this one is completely unfounded–itd have to be double dee from EEnE.

[thespacewithin]

Do INFJ’s get hurt easily?

There's a secret most infj's dont tell others, or sometimes they themselves aren't concious of it.

When you observe infj's, there are a few signs that stand out from all the rest. Infj's are deeply driven to live a full and inspired life, they want to experience meaning and beauty to its absolute core, and they also perceive the deep, beautiful, and painful emotions entangled in the human experience. This makes them very intense people. If you've ever had an infj open their heart to you, it is an intense experience. They have a passion for affection that's unique.

When I say see, I mean they can observe other people and pick up the smallest emotional details of their lives, building a theme of what that person is experiencing, has experienced, and at times…what they may experience in the future. They don't just perceive the theme of anothers sorrows and anguish, but also the details, painting a picture of others with a pallette of colors and a variety of brushes. If they can see someone is lonely, they might add a whole plethora of other characteristics, such as that same person being kind, or defensive, insecure, tying all of these emotions together into a holistic picture.

This is a beautiful trait of Ni+Fe, and no other personality sees emotions so clearly. While infj's do this, they rarely outwardly articulate what they see, preferring to keep their knowledge internal, and adjusting themselves to act in a way that's fitting towards those they observe. (I want to emphasize that this ability is a good trait of infj's, they are not “wrong” for being this way, their emotional perception is a blessing.)

They do this for a few reasons. Infj's have learned that if they manifest what they know, it has a massive impact on the other. In addition, what infj's perceive is difficult to articulate, as it exists in an emotional, ethereal realm, and concretely explaining what you see to others is hard to find the right language for. Worse yet, there are times that if the infj spoke bluntly the other person would not be emotionally aware enough within themselves to grasp the depth of their own experience.

This puts infj's in a position where they can genuinely see others, but rarely connect with them at the level in which they see. This isn't a small problem, when you mine into it, the deeper you go the darker and more painful it gets. Every infj, at one point in their lives, attempted to connect with another at this level, and at the least it's likely they experienced a sorrowful lack of reciprocation. When they did, the infj was innocent, trying to express their real selves, only to be misunderstood, burnt, or rejected. This happens all the time for infj's, and it leaves them extremely lonely. To have such a big heart with no avenue to express yourself makes you feel completely unseen. This is why infj's are social chameleons: They cannot trust that if they're their authentic selves, they will be seen or accepted. In reality, this is true. The vast majority of personalities *cannot* see and understand infj's. Very few can. Infj's dont just feel misunderstood, they *are* misunderstood. This is because Ni insights are a one way street, those who don't have Ni cannot reciprocate the understanding that comes from it, and that understanding just happens to be deep, rare, and hard to articulate.

Optional reading to know why deep infj connections are rare:

(Because Ni/Ne revolves around meaning and beauty it is deep. Only 4 personalities share Ni in top slots, with an additional 4 possessing high Ne traits. The enfj is well positioned to see and care for infj's, but at the expense of a logical connection. Trickster Fe puts an interesting spin on intj's. Intj's can build intellectual connections, but theyre amongst the worst personality to develop deep emotional connections with, although it appears in some cases this isnt always true. Entj's with a developed Inferior Fi have the capacity to understand infj's emotionally and intellectually, but infj's will have a hard time understanding entj's because of Trickster Te. Therefore, of the 16 personalities, only a few others are equipped to meet infj's emotionally where they're at, in the deep, beautiful, and true realm of Ni/Ne insights, and four of them lean heavily towards Thinking traits. These make up 2.5% (enfj), 1.7%(entj) and 2.1%(intj)of the population (5.3%), as well as Ne users. Entj's don't develop Inferior Fi until 30+ years old, if at all, so it would be rare and require exact timing/development for this pair to form a strong emotional connection, although I imagine the safety infj's can provide may expedite this blooming. Infj's can form various other connections with people, but not at the deepest levels of Ni/Ne. Because these numbers and connection implications are real, they're explanatory to the infj's feelings of isolation.

There's a concept that needs to be grasped here:

*If nobody can see you, then you are nothing.*

But if somebody can see you, then they are everything, but that everything never comes, no matter how hard you try, no matter how much you bleed, no matter how much you give.

Herein sits the very core of the infj's sorrow. They feel like they are nothing because nobody can see them the way they see others. Suffice to say this is typically true for all personalities on one level or another, but because infj's see deeper and emotionally, it affects them more profoundly. At least a magnitude larger than any other personality. The rarity of infj's amplifies isolation. An infj's Parent Fe inclines them to need someone they can love, which is unique amongst the parent functions, and they love fiercely.

Because of this, infj's have an acute empathy for the pain of others, particularly with lonliness and castigation, because lonliness and castigation is the default life experience of infj's, at one level or another. Now, they not only see people, but they also embody others pain *through themselves*. This is why they're referenced as having a martyr vibe, but it comes from sincere experience: They seek to “save” others in emotional pain because *they know* what it feels like.

The innocent logic of Ti struggles to make sense of why infj's aren't accepted when they readily understand and accept others. Because this is a deeply painful experience, infj's reason that one can become valuable if they learn specific skills, and they're at risk of seeing people's value according to what they do, because infj's are not valued for who they are. Because of this, every infj has put effort into developing a special talent(s), and they are often perfectionistic and critical towards themselves in this pursuit because of the pain that underlies it. If only they could be perfect at what they do, then maybe their value could be recognized. This is wrong. Infj's are valuable for who they *are*.

This is why they can end up with narcissists, or other scarred people, because *more than anything, they can deeply connect with anothers pain, because this is what they know and experience. *

So are infj's easily hurt? Not particularly, but singularly: If you represent hope to an infj in terms of actually seeing them and caring for them in return, and if this hope is diminished in any way, it will be deeply painful, sometimes even fatal.

Infj's know this, and that is why they choose a very few number of people to actually open themselves up to, they need to first trust that they can, but because they often pick those who are hurting, the odds of them finding a person whos in pain but not maladaptive *is significantly lower*. Not only do they pick those who are hurting, but often these people have no real wavelength in which they can reciprocate deep empathy or understanding, because Ni+Fe is unique in this, and only a handful of other personalties have the functional sophistication to perceive infj's for who they are at core levels.

After being burnt a few times, infj's decide not to try anymore, and you can't blame them.

This is why they find it difficult to find longterm relationships, why they can tend to end up alone. Sometimes they end up alone even while in a bound relationship, suffering, and remaining to be unseen. The world cannot understand or accept the deep, intense and childlike love infj's wish to give, and it's a sorrow that burdens the subconcious of the infj daily. The plaguing thought ringing in stillness echoes “Nobody loves me”.

In the deepest recess of the infj's heart, they're intimately aware of this, and within this realm, you can easily hurt them. In a sense, the love infj's wish to give and receive isn't an ideal, it's a reality of how love *should be experienced*, it's not the concept that's wrong, it's that there are just very few people who can fathom, experience, and share love at this depth. In reality, other people who lack this depth aren't wrong either, they just don't have the potential within themselves to experience love in these terms. There's something fascinating to realize about this exchange. Inasmuch as the possibility of exchanging love at this level appears very rare for a variety of the above stated reasons, at least *it is* possible for a smaller group of people. I haven't quite figured out the limit, but it's very possible that the full depth of this love can only be shared with other Ni users, a deeper but not the deepest level with Ne users, and the least levels with Sensors, as this represents the different functional potentials embodied from conceptually deepest to conceptually nonexistent, remembering that an ideal can only be fathomed and boundless within the realm of potential and imagination *before* it can become manifest in reality. So then it's not the ideal then that's wrong, but in the same way a jewel is rare and not common, so is the full experience of this ideal. This is the nature of how it appears to me, and I believe my grasp of the dynamics is fairly accurate. In many ways, infj's can conjure love in idealistic terms from Ni, and then actually implement their affections via Fe, which is nothing less than extraordinary. One can imagine why not having this reciprocated feels like a serious loss.

I counsel infj's to only seek those who can see you as a first priority, and don't be lured by another person's ache. You must be sure you are being seen *first* before even thinking about proceeding in relationships. You *will not* find many. It may take years, even decades, but they *are* out there. I understand there's a sense that if you cannot connect through pain, then the other can't fully understand your experience, and this is a legitimate concern. However, it should not be the driving factor in your relationships, rather, look for people who are gentle, kind, and generally able to intuitively connect, and then seek to connect through pain as a secondary goal. When somebody genuinely connects with you, you can't miss it, especially if it's in your own wavelength.

Also, please recognize that your ability to see people in this way is a real gift, truly. In a way your particular functions make you more alive than anyone, which is the cost of often feeling more grief than anyone. You have been chosen out of others to be this way. Your vision of what love can be is inspiring, and quite frankly everyone should adopt it, it's what we were created for.

Original post:

[hotchfiles]

Lari, I apologize in advance, but I really want to add to the discussion of writers supporting writers, because it makes my blood boil sometimes, lol, and I'm sorry if this gets long, and if i sound like a bitch but....

Okay, first off, interaction is important, period! Doesn't matter if you have no followers, if you are a writer with a few followers, or a writer with a lot of followers interaction is important, in every sense! And writers with a lot of followers should be VERY aware of that, because once upon a time, they were a smaller blog too, wishing for people to interact with their works.

Writers especially feed on the interaction, and especially seeing people's thoughts and opinions on their works, and that's where the comments and reblogs come into play!

One thing, that apparently, some big blogs seem to either forget, or not give a sh*t about anymore, because they are just too big now. People are interacting with their works, so they've made it, right? Wrong, because once again, your readers, and their interaction with your works made you big! So, instead of being high and mighty, return the favor by boosting the works you liked reading, written by smaller blogs! (Side note, I'm not hating on anyone, calling anyone out specifically, or etc. But I was a writer in another fandom once, and it was much the same, and it grated on my nerves then, and it's grating on my nerves now)

I was a writer that only used to like, when I was running my old blog, but on this one, reblog, reblog, reblog. Doesn't matter that I don't have a huge number of followers that can benefit from recs, I'm supporting the writer, and to me, that's the most important.

On the mutuals matter, I think you said it right. My works might not be my mutuals cup of tea, or theirs might not be mine. One thing i wanna add here, even if I have mutuals, who's works I don't read because x, y, z, every once in a while I'd reblog a work of theirs and be like "check out this person's works, they write great (character) fics". To me that's just a way to boost your moots, and who knows, maybe someone that follows you actually likes their works.

On indirectly being asked to read their stuff, I think there's nothing wrong with that, BUT! Like you said, if I'm going to support you, I'd expect you to support me too. It's not hard. I myself have asked others to read my works (on my old blog), but I've made sure to interact with them via asks, read and interact with their works, before and after asking! And not because I want to be transactional or anything, but because I genuinely enjoy their works, and asking them to read mine, yes, it might boost me up, but i just want to hear what some of my favorite writers think about something I've written. Later, those same people became my mutuals and I loved that we lifted each other up!

Finally, if some people aren't comfortable interacting, that's completely and totally fine!  What I wrote is for the writers, that honestly should know how tumblr and the community works, well enough to know that boosting people and interacting with people makes for a greater overall experience!

And to the anon that started this whole thing (if they are even reading this, lol), continue being supportive and interesting with the blogs you love, and the works you enjoy! If you still want to read the works of the writers you talked about, be a silent reader, lol. Like you said, they're doing fine! Devote your time and energy and interact with the people that will support you back, and are sweet and kind to you! And, be the person you are now, supportive, because it seems some writers tend to lose sight of where they came from when they grow, and to the ones that don't, you rock!

Again, I'm so sorry for this being so long, lol🥴 (also, if I'm being too bitchy, feel free to ignore and delete this, lol)

i dont even have anything to add you said it perfectly

i love that you mentioned the transaction part because YEAH its not about being a transaction or anything of the sort, its about being reciprocal, and treating others works like you want yours to be treated

i genuinely love reading and helping so i dont mind at all when people ask for me to do that, i just feel like that if you enjoy either my fics enough for that, i should be seeing you reblogging or commenting my fics and the people (really, people, it happens quite frequently) i mentioned just never ever ever reblogged or commented on any of it 😭

i honestly thought i was exaggerating it but it seems its been happening to a lot of writers so

please, writers (especially if you complain about comments and reblogs)

be reciprocal

[crystallizsch]

Hi...I'm new to the twst fandom, and i saw you help out someone else with recommendations so i was hoping you could help me tooo? 🥺 I'm worried about bothering people with asks and stuff, so i was wondering if you had any recommendations for blogs of nice/welcoming people in the fandom? 👉👈 It would be nice to make some friends...

You seem really friendly and welcoming, which is why I managed to send this...I just don't want to annoy anyone...💔💀 Thanks!!!!!!!!

AWHH HELLO HI WHAT THANK YOU SO MUCH??

i sometimes worry that i may be too overwhelming (if that’s the right word for it???) to even approach so that means so much to hear 😭💖💕

also i MAY have rambled too much,,, i ended up giving (unsolicited) advice as well im so sorry but i just wanted to say some additional things too about making friends in the fandom in general 🤧

anyways anon it’s all right under the cut 💖

AAGH FIRSTLY welcome to the twst fandom!! so glad to see you joining in!

i’ve only been in the fandom since the beginning of this year actually! and so far as my experience goes it’s been so fun!! people create amazing things and share amazing ideas with one another so i hope you enjoy your stay!

ALSO it makes me happy that you even think i’m approachable enough for recs 😭💖

i'm admittedly very biased though because a lot of the blogs i consider nice/welcoming are already mutuals/friends of mine 🤧

and i’m lowkey highkey kind of shy mentioning them again ahglsjdlsalk so i’d like to point you back to that original post here even though im assuming that you literally just came from there 😭

im so sorry i couldnt be more helpful with recs 😭💔 but all of them i do consider pretty nice blogs!!

ANYWAYS PLEASE DONT WORRY ABOUT “ANNOYING” ANYONE YOU ARE NOT A BOTHER most people love receiving asks/interactions!!

i really understand the feeling though!! it’s hard making that first move sometimes,,, and honestly (i know it sounds incredibly cliche but) you’ll never really know if you’ll click with someone here until you try!!

and i'm not sure if you post or not but! it's definitely how I've met the people i’m mutuals/friends with here!

i’ve made friends with others who regularly/every now and then reblog with nice tags or comments on my posts ;;; and i do the same on my main blog! i tend to leave a lot of tags when i reblog posts that i like

and sometimes it just,,, happens??? especially if you and the other person have a shared interest in the fandom!

anyways,,,

send people asks!! reblog with nice tags!! comment!! just let other people that you're there!! the right people for you will reciprocate 💖💖💖 (also this is in no way being against people who just prefer to silently lurk/interact btw i still appreciate you guys 🫶 this is just for if you want to interact more and make friends in the process!!)

but that's just me!!

similar to what i said on the original post i encourage you to find and interact with other people that you think you would vibe with!!

there's a lot of different corners in this fandom that are into way different things about the game than me. and the people that i vibe with might not necessarily vibe with you which is not anyone's fault!! it’s just the way it is 💖

(also i forgot to mention this in my original post --- i'm not sure if you're a minor or not so make sure if you decide to check out some blogs allow minors to interact 🙏 ) (and a lot of blogs outline their boundaries and rules on their intro posts that are pinned so keep that in mind!)

i have no idea how to end this hsjshsjs but generally just find others who like the same twst things as you and interact with them!! it’s okay to do little by little until you’re comfortable, there is never any rush 🫶

AGAIN i hope you have fun here and i wish you the best!! 💖💖💕

[sunflawyer]

Hi, sorry if this is a bother, but I wanted to ask a question since I'm new to the community. If someone says that they don't share their f/o, what does that mean? I understand they don't want to speak to people who have the same f/o as them, but what does it entail? Like, does it mean that they don't want anyone with the same f/o interacting with them completely, or do they mean that they just don't want anyone talking about the relationship they have with their f/o? Sorry if my question is confusing; I hope I worded it correctly.

hi sweets! 🧡 oh, this is such a great question! thank you for asking me (and the community!) welcome!! 💕

to answer it - if someone states they dont share their f/os, that means they dont want people (who ships with the same f/o) to interact with them at all. sometimes it can make them uncomfortable because some selfshippers treat their ship like an actual relationship! 💗 usually they will just block and move on for their own comfort.

but sometimes it also depends on the person themselves. there are also some nonsharing selfshippers who allow doubles to interact, but they wont reciprocate. however it's best to just keep the interaction to minimum to prevent unwanted conflict in the future. usually they will state their nonsharing status in their bio/carrd.

its all about creating a safe place for our own! as long as we're respectful of each other, im sure there wont be any unnecessary conflicts. 🧡

comments are open for all! drop your opinion and thoughts about this so that we can educate each other as well. (⁠✿⁠^⁠‿⁠^⁠)

[eldritchmochi]

talking about the cishet man i, a visibly gnc trans person, am courting and how he explicitly reciprocates my interest, to queers at large at a pride event the other day has given me a new appreciation of how god damned annoying the general habit people have of insisting someone's identity is actually [insert something other than what they explicitly id as here] because whatever reason like

im absolutely also guilty of this. i am guilty of this with this particular person even! i try not to because if i am allowed to use whatever hodgepodge of labels i want for myself, everyone else can too, what does it matter? and i certainly feel that my boy is not "just" your run of the mill straight dude, as he keeps insisting, i get big demi vibes from him, but i dont know if i doubt his interests lying pretty exclusively towards femmes, a category i most certainly belong in

i just. dont get why its so weird that a straight dude has interest in me. plenty of straight dudes are attracted to plenty of trans and gnc people of all presentations, why is my boy suddenly definitely queer because hes not an asshole about it? why is he definitely queer because he tells his straight dude friends their queerphobic jokes arent funny? dont we want straight dudes who do that?

why can we not accept that sometimes there are cishet men who truly are good and respectful of queerness without actually being closet cases? why can we not encourage and reward straight dudes who are truly queer allies with the same respect of identity they afford us? whats so hard about accepting a straight dude who is comfortable having incidental interest in someone outside of standard gender norms as still straight?

i stg i am gonna start spraying people like naughty cats when they argue that my boy is totally not straight. hes my straight boyfriend, not urs, u don't get a vote on his straightness

[lesbianrobin]

i understand ur post but i have a byler mutual saying almost the exact same thing about if they make mlvn endgame because to give will one sole love interest and put him through that much trauma and struggle to accept his sexuality only to have the guy reject him and end up with his sister is homophobic writing and u probably dont agree but i find it hysterical that st have managed to get themselves into such a conundrum that their only option is to introduce mikes secret twin of the opposite sexuality thats been there the whole time so they both get a happy ending. surely this is a perfect plan and there are no flaws whatsoever and everyone will be satisfied

SMCKSKXJSNKE i was literally just talking to sarah about how they've written themselves into a corner by reintroducing the stoncy love triangle in s4 because BEFORE they could have been like yeah steve is over her and now he's finding fulfillment outside of romance etc etc but now they've reignited stancy for some fuckin reason (my fingers are crossed for that theory that says since the upside down is stuck in 1983 it was making steve and nancy's 1983 feelings come back) and suddenly they'll be pissing off Some segment of the fanbase no matter what they do.

re: byler i think. well first of all i think that byler isn't even remotely on the radar of casual viewers as an actual possibility and i don't think it could happen in s5 bc the vast majority of viewers would be like where the fuck did that come from. second of all my el argument is partially a joke but also it's just fundamentally a very different situation where like. for will if byler doesn't happen nothing gets Worse for him shit just stays the same. for el if byler happens something Must get worse for her like she loses her boyfriend of 2-3 years. they're in different situations.

third of all i think it's very silly for people to act like will Needs for mike to like him back in order to be happy when like. it's not The Crush that's making will miserable it's being closeted in a small town in the 1980s and feeling like he can never have what he wants and be truly happy in life. mike liking him back would not fix the misery he feels at having to hide this part of himself from the world.

yknow in s3 robin is a sorta closed-off character who's snarky and prickly at times and she only really opens up in the russian torture scene + the bathroom scene. and in the bathroom scene she is Terrified to tell steve she likes girls but she confesses to having a crush on tammy thompson and... steve makes her feel okay about it. he makes fun of her crush and robin feels Normal and Safe and they laugh together and by the time s4 rolls around robin is a much more open and happy person than she was back before she'd come out to steve. she's more herself. and you know what never happened? tammy thompson never liked her back. robin didn't need a girlfriend. she needed love and support and validation from a good friend. she needed to find comfort with herself and her sexuality and all the other parts of her that she hid behind a tough exterior for protection.

as much as i hate watching will scenes bc noah schnapp can't act for shit, i am kinda looking forward to seeing him finally openly addressing his sexuality in s5 and maybe realizing that his childhood crush on his best friend not being reciprocated isn't the end of the world. i think if will could move on and let mike go (in the romantic sense not as a friend) it might also feel a bit like letting go of all his pain over the past few years and starting over with a clean slate. obviously idk what exactly's gonna happen in s5 we're all just making shit up right now but i guess that's kinda what i hope will happen with him.

it makes me sad kinda that will's most dedicated fans are more preoccupied with getting him a boyfriend than like... self-confidence and shit. but i'm not actually that sad bc i kinda don't give a fuck about will anyway

[shallanigans]

oooh im so glad u watched dbd! yeah so charles, in the comics, is canon bisexual. he's also, in the show, a teen boy who died in the 80s. which. the AIDS crisis. the first person to die of AIDS in england did so in 1981. take that, and then pair it up with his reaction to edwin's confession, particularly what he says.

hes not closing the door to edwin or this opportunity--what he is doing, is saying that they have the rest of forever to figure this out. he's not wrong. he just needs for the two of them to be able to reach that forever first, and to do that they need to run up the stairs and away from the doll spider demon.

i think, for charles, who is so devoted to edwin, and clearly loves him above all else, the answer he gave was perfect--he cant say hes in love with edwin back, so he doesnt. he cant say hes in love with edwin back, because he doesnt know! as a bi person, ill say this. in my experience, there have been a few times, where there have been moments of, i dont know yet. and obviously that is not everyone's experience, and im not even saying that is charles' experience! but he loves edwin so much, and he wants to figure out if he loves edwin in a romantic way too--and to do that, he needs to think about it, and again, he cant do that on a stairway to hell running from a demon. perhaps, its even more than that--perhaps, he wants to figure out if he can. has he thought about his sexuality before? has he ever been attracted to a boy before? has he ever consciously been? maybe these are things he needs to think about. he likes girls, check. maybe he likes boys too? he's a detective, he'll figure it out.

i do think that expecting a love confession reciprocation (which we did get, it was just not a romantic one, and even then, it wasnt shut down forever) right away, and then not getting it, was not necessarily bad thing. ultimately, dbd is a story, a tv show, there are characters and then there is development--there is build up. so to not get that confession, it makes sense storytelling wise. because we havent gotten to see charles come to terms with his sexuality, or even think much about it (consciously), beyond being attracted to crytsal. (and. all those longing yearning loving looks directed at edwin lbr) we get to see edwin come to terms with his sexuality in s1. he was repressing pretty hard and wasnt even aware he was in love with charles. so, in the hopes we get a s2, maybe we'll find ourselves with a charles having an oh moment scene. id kill for that

I would absolutely love to see this, and I know in the show the love confession wasn't explicitly a shutdown. However, based on Edwin's comments to Niko that "it made us better friends"/that Charles didn't feel the same, and also based on comments from the showrunners about how they wanted to focus on the platonic friendship between them, I am not so optimistic.

In the case that it does happen, I'm frankly not looking forward to a several-season love triangle between Crystal, Edwin and Charles. Of course, I understand Charles not reciprocating Edwin's feelings immediately (and especially not in that setting). However, I really don't care for his romance with Crystal because I feel they have no chemistry. It annoyed me that Charles pretty much put the whole thing out of his mind afterwards and went back to wanting to be with Crystal for no real reason other than she's a girl who was a good friend to him. I understand that TV shows work like this, but I'm tired of love triangles in general. If Charles and Edwin don't get together (or at least Charles doesn't address Edwin's confession in some manner) in season 2 I probably won't be watching it. I've seen too many teen shows drag on with unnecessary romance drama between people who have no chemistry, and I don't want another one to add to the list.

[charlestrask]

Sorry if you've said this and I missed it but what do you think of the nature of John and Paul's relationship? Sorry if that sounds like an interrogation or whatever I just feel like the mclennon fandom has such a wide range of takes and I'm always curious what other people think. Like personally I think it's like, almost factual that John had sexual/romantic feelings for Paul. Paul is harder for me to read but I think it was reciprocated to some extent. Like I guess my personal "pet theory" is that they kinda fooled around off and on and just blamed it on booze/drugs/whatever and at some point it got to a point where it was too serious and they couldn't nohomo it anymore which lead to denial and the implosion of their relationship. I love the idea they had like a long term love affair but idk if I buy that. Sorry for the rambling...😓

very difficult question. short answer is that i believe a lot of different things all the time and also don't believe any of them. long answer is what do i think REALISTICALLY happened in real life actions between them? not a lot. i doubt they ever had anything that they would consider sex (because as we know, they would not consider jerking off in proximity to each other or having sex with women in the same room as each other as something like sex between them). i also doubt either of them confessed romantic or sexual love to each other (at least in words that would be clearly construed as such). as for what was going on in inner feelings? i think its basically confirmed that john felt romantic and/or sexual feelings towards paul, although i think he only realised them as such near the end/after the breakup of the beatles. i dont think paul is consciously aware of any romantic/sexual feelings towards john, although whether they exist subconsciously i truly dont know. i do think the importance of their relationship to each other in THEIR minds may have included romantic/sexual feelings but was comprised of something a lot bigger/beyond that. i think they and others recognized that they had similar tension and relationship dynamics to an actual couple but i dont necessarily think that that registered as an actual possibility. and i dont think realistically anything TANGIBLE happened in india and johns kind of sudden change in feeling is largely mixed in with his mental health, brians death and the maharishi/magic alex/yoko and his need to latch onto and then destroy his idols. but then i also believe maybe all of that could be wrong and maybe they were fucking like rabbits all the time! who knows! i would love to know.

[quadrant-query]

Why is it that every troll i wax pale for turns out to be a traditionalist when it comes to concilliatory roles?

Im a bronzeblood but ive got some fucked think pan hoofbeast shit going on that makes me get really agitated for perigrees at a time. I’ve been on the market for a moirail for a long time, but it feels like everyone whos ever interested is someone higher on the spectrum who wants a pitiable lowblooded conciliator. The last time i dated a rustblood, she broke up with me because she thought i was too “high maintenance.”

It’s not like i never want to be the pacifier, im all about reciprocal moiraillegiance, but it’s like everywhere i turn everyone wants the same old even-tempered, pacifying brownblood. I dont know if i keep attracting this type of troll or if theyre just the only people in my area. Ugh! What does a troll have to do to get some conciliatory action out here?

That really sucks and I'm sorry to hear that, actually. People don't often talk about the ways the skewed traditionalist views of romantic roles can harm the people in them; likely because it's usually in ways (or to people) not deemed "important". I sympathize with your struggle.

If I were you, I might start intentionally seeking out a moirail who is closer to your caste, or perhaps even lower. That could lower the chances of them being an ass about things. Alternatively, you could be much more upfront about your boundaries before getting into a relationship, (though this requires the other troll to not lie to you).

You could also try emphasizing your volatile-ness of your problems in order to attract pity from people who want to soothe that sort of behavior; but I understand this may feel demeaning for you.

[plasmasimagination]

Hello! I DONT KNOW IF UR REQUESTS R OPEN so feel free to ignore this if they're not.

This is a request for a romantic male matchup (from star rail, and genshin), coming from a female requester. Pls feel free to ignore this request if it makes you uncomfortable.

Gender: Female

Heterosexual (afab)

Mbti: INTP/INFP

Pisces

My pronouns are she/her. I am an adult. My height is 5'4. I am south asian, I have collarbone length dark brown wavy hair, my eyes are the darkest brown possible. I would say I have soft facial features.I am mostly thin, but I carry a lot of weight on my thighs, something I’m love and hate at the same time.I try my best to appear alert, but many times, I often zone out and look very clueless and blank, and have no idea what is going on. I am very shy generally, and I'm kinda awkward too. I care a lot about my close friends and would do anything for them. I am very soft spoken, and can be a doormat sometimes. It takes a long time for me to get comfortable with people, so I may seem boring at the start. I also dislike making the first move, as I’m utterly clueless on how to. I’m pretty lazy too, I can sleep for 2 days at a time. I also am a bit sensitive, if someone close to me does something, I get a little worked up over it. I tend to disassociate under tense situations. I have very few friends, as I cannot handle too many. I would also consider myself to be a hopeless romantic. I often tend to become completely block out my emotions, but sometimes, I’m extremely sensitive and will cry over anything, no in between.

I would describe my dressing sense as kinda elegant, feminine and colourful, i love wearing dresses and mary jane shoes.

I love shopping, jewellery, and perfume, though I’m broke (college is hard). I get flustered, really, really easily. 

Likes: I love making miniature things like miniature houses, buildings etc. I love watching ballet, though I could never learn ballet myself. I also love going outdoors. I also like hanging out with my friends, and sweets.

Dislikes: crowds, unhygienic surroundings are a major peeve, being left out, bland food, horror movies, really scary amusement park rides, being yelled at.

Love language:

Giving: all of them but mainly words of affirmation, quality time, and physical touch. I am pretty vocal about my love, and if I’m deep into the relationship, I tend to forget that there are people around who are being made uncomfortable by the pda.

Receiving: Anything is fine, as long as it reminds me that I’m loved.

I would like someone who will make the first move, and remind me that my love is reciprocated.

HAIII SWEEETIEEE ヾ( ˃ᴗ˂ )◞

*sniff sniff* yeah I know who it is

Your matchup issss......

.

.

.

JING YUAN

You can be a doormat to people? Don't worry babe you're gonna be a freaking queen to Jing yuan.

With him next to you he won't allow anyone to even try to take advantage of your kindness

Don't like making the first move? Don't worry Jing yuan already asked you out, and he's very chill about it, my man's not putting any pressure on you

Also I think Jing yuan would spoil you ROTTEN.

Like money problems? He ain't heard of em

Hes also the type of person to be quite open about his love for you

So never have to worry about feeling like he doesn't love you, because at least 5 times a day he tells you how much he loves you, how proud he is of you, how amazing you are . . . You get the jist

He's also an act of service type of guy so expect a bit help with chores/tasks here and there >:)

HEIZOU

Flirty boyfriend x easily flustered girlfriend

The matchup may seem weird but trust I think it would be cute

Also Heizou would 1000% find his way into your heart, you got to do nothing!

Heizou...will show his love to you very audibly and often

From physical affection to words of affirmations to gift giving...everything

Literally all the 5 love languages are his to give you

Aside from his flirty demeanour he's also very caring, he'll always make sure you're comfortable, especially around other people

He's also aware of your emotional state and will assist you no matter if you're feeling emotional or emotionless, he's really a shoulder to cry on and someone to worry about you

[youremyheaven]

Hey, I always end up here for some reason. I actually do have a lot of people I want to ask about but it would take an eternity, but I would like to ask about relationships. I never dated but I did attract the boys I liked, some moments just happened for 1 or more years but I couldn't date them or anything, I don't regret nothing but I do remember them messing bad and it always ends up with me and my dignity, and I choose latter. They do remember and "seem" to like me even after months, as I heard from my friends after I stopped talking to them which I don't what's happening like where was your courtesy before? With such failed attempts in barely seeing them made me question my own taste. If I remember I know they reciprocate the feelings from here and there but they never told me directly, it's like I've to put efforts which I mostly don't and I don't want to assume anything so I just have to move on. I take my time and they end up doing bizzare things so I create some distance. There was a guy who did confess after whole ton of my hardwork but it was such a trashy experience, I didn't settle of course but my goodness never in my life again. I just gave up on this matter overall, let's see what happens next. I want to be a little delusional for a while. Can you talk about V a little bit, I was curious because I relate to him a lot and I thought of it as romantic before but I don't think it's the same now, I don't know what I'm trying to say but you haven't talked about him much either and I wished to hear this from your side? So if you just want to add something? Maybe I'll know myself a little too? Can you also talk about my attraction to such partners and them being weird?

i dont know if i entirely understood what you were trying to say

but basically you attract boys you like but even if they seem to like you, you don't get them to confess or be straight up with you??

IF this is what you meant,

boys who dont tell you they like you are weaklings. a lack of clear communication means they dont like you enough to risk their pride getting bruised. if a guy genuinely likes you, he'll risk it all and be straightforward with you

guys hold back when they have multiple thoughts running through their head and ideally their only thought should be bagging u

what goes on in their heads is none of our business and it doesnt matter. a guy who does not actually be clear with his intentions and does not pursue you is NOT worth your time. leave them in the dust.

idk how young you are but since you say you dont have any experience dating , i feel like saying this, its okay to want to be desired and wanted by others. there is nothing wrong with it. its biological and natural.

so ask yourself if you just wanted a bunch of admirers or if you actually wanted to date these guys

i know it can be really confusing and stressing as well tbh when someone gives you mixed signals but honestly just leave it at that. theyre being shady because THEY have shady intentions. no man with actually good intentions would hesitate to approach you directly my queen<333

idk how useful this is but im someone with a very "a win is a win" mentality lmao in the sense that if i liked someone and they liked me back, thats a win 😌😜

you did hear from your friends that those guys liked you, so likeeee 👀💅🏻

the number of people who like you, who you have mutual liking with etc will always exceed the number of people you actually date bc thats just math

if 10 guys like u and u like them back, u cant date all 10 in one go (or maybe u can but u'd have to figure that one out urself 🤡)

alsooo men being weird is just ://// how a lot of men are. many guys are straight up bizarre ://// dont take that stuff personally

about V (taehyung), he's actually my least favourite BTS member tbh,, idk if its because he's a Revati Moon (atmakaraka) with Mars in Uttara Ashadha amatyakaraka or what but he's always struck me as a guy who was kinda tough to be around. i dont think he's horrible or anything but his Shravana Venus, UA Mercury and Mars, Moon conjunct Ketu,,, its a weird combo,, he himself is a bit offbeat and eccentric but he would expect his partner to be kinda traditional and modest. i just dont like malefic influenced men i guess :///

something about his sweet boy act feels insincere to me. and as someone who has been around manyyyyy Revatis ,, i dont like that ADHD type behaviour they exhibit (im not making fun of anyone who actually suffers from ADHD and nor am i equating a mental condition with a nakshatra, i just dont know how else to describe the way manyyy Mercurials act??? yk all those funny reels and tiktoks about how gen z has a short attention span and communicate in a weird way bc they're chronically online, yeah, thats how a lot of Mercurials act)

a bit of a self-drag but i went to a girls school until i was 15 and had never interacted with a guy my age, after switching to a co-ed school at 16, i had to learn how to deal with guys from scratch. its a whole different world ill tell u. i think atp due to your lack of experiences with dating, you just dont know what to expect and how to deal with it. and thats okayyy,, this is just a part of life and youll figure it out for yourself as you go. dont stress out too much and dont worry about it tbh,, there are 8 billion people on this planet, there has to be a decent guy who will be honest, as well <333