#and aww missed you gremlin

[moviecritc]

fearless ⋆ alex albon

pairing: alex albon x driver!reader

summary: your boyfriend and you disguise your relationship as friendship a little too well

warnings: none, just pure fluff

a/n: this is short and maybe a little bit messy, sorry i'm not effortlestly funny

english is not my first language, sorry for the mistakes

masterlist | wattpad | letterboxd

yourusername just posted!

liked by flavy.barla, alexalbon and 75,194 others

yourusername P3 IN MIAMI RAAAAHHH 🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅 I LOVE AMERICA SO MUCH 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 TF IS A KM I ONLY KNOW MILESSSSSS 🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠🤠

ps. goodbye goodbye goodbye meme of nowins you were bigger than the whole skyyy

tagged; flavy.barla, alexalbon

yourusername btw that's my new gf flavy, sorry ocon she's mine now 👰👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

flavy.barla 💋👭 estebanocon wait what did i miss yourusername nothing you can leave actually

user1 SHE'S JUST IN ANOTHER LEVEL

user2 best driver in the grid fr user3 nah she's talentless user4 she literally made a podium yesterday you prick

alexalbon wHAT ON EARTH IS THAT PIC

yourusername shh you look wonderful albono alexalbon i look like a minion yourusername AHAHAHA IT'S TRUE YOU'RE KEVIN alexalbon who's kevin yourusername ... a minion alexalbon why d'you know the names of the minions? user5 nah alex you left her speechless

charlesleclerc congrats on your podium, y/n!

landonorris i appreciate the effort 😅

yourusername ANYWAYS IT'S TECNICALLY NOWIN(S) SO IT'S STILL UPPPP landonorris oh lord

user6 i'm actually so jealous of the friendship of alex and y/n

user7 i'm new here someone explain me the lore plss user8 so y/n and alex have known each other since literally always? they started karting at the same age and were teammates in f2, then they got into f1 in the same year. they've always been super super close, they even shared an apartment in london a few years ago. and basically when they're around each other is a complete chaos, that's why they don't do media days together so often user9 their gossip sessions in media days back then >>>> user10 omg yes i'll never forget when alex almost choke on water after y/n told him she wished he was bald bc she didn't like his bleached hair LMAOOO

scuderiaferrari Let's go!!

user11 anyone else noticing the flowers

user12 not this again, they're probably from her mother, she always receives flowers when she's in the points 🙄 user13 the audacity of these people user12 i swear they try to link her to any guy she interacts for 0.5 secs

alexalbon just posted a story!

[caption: i might be a minion but she's a freaking gremlin @yourusername]

replies

yourusername you're dead. you're so dead

alexalbon i love you babyyy 😍🥰😍🥰😍🥰

yourusername i don't. i'm going to make you eat all the flowers

alexalbon y/n you're so mental for your height. like, so many anger inside of you

yourusername yeah it's true 😞 i'll get even with your minion face

alexalbon ok from now on we're just seeing each other in public spaces. i love youuu byeeeee 😇😇😘😘

yourusername just posted a story!

[caption: YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING ME LOOK AT WHAT I FOUND ON MY GALLERY AHSHAHQURJFJSHAHD]

replies

user1 someone get this girl a pr manager 😂😂

alexalbon Y/N L/N-ALBON.

yourusername lol what. if that's your way of asking me to marry you... dude you can do it better

alexalbon I WAS TRYING TO BE A COOL BOYFRIEND

yourusername aww. but you're not, and i don't want to marry you you're like my getaway car

alexalbon YOUR GETAWAY CAR FROM WHO?? you barely interact with men

yourusername YEAH BC INTERACTING WITH MEN IS ANNOYING, like look at this. just shut up already

alexalbon WELL OK BYE. LET'S SEE WHO BUYS YOU HIGH QUALITY MOCHIS NOW

yourusername wait albono come back. let's get married or something

yourusername just posted!

liked by alexalbon, georgerussell63 and 52,512 others

yourusername anyone knows this man?? he's been staring at me the whole flight and asking me if i have bananas

tagged; alexalbon

view all comments

user1 no bc if alex looked at my like this i would probably fall in love

liked by yourusername

user2 Y/N LIKED??

georgerussell63 oh blimey so here he is!

yourusername george pls take him, he's annoying me with photo of his 275423 cats alexalbon Y/N YOU LOVE MY CATS yourusername yeah ig i have to user3 i'm starting to think that these two have more than a friendship going on

alexalbon just posted a story!

[caption: came threatened but this is actually a blast]

replies

yourusername alex i'm going to post something don't panic

alexalbon y/n i'm literally by your side tf are you texting

yourusername just posted!

liked by alexalbon, logansargeant and 93,512 others

yourusername woke up today and choose to be fearless. anyways, eras tour with my biiitch <3333 🤩🤩

view all comments

georgerussell63 everybody act surprised now!!

user1 OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE IT

user2 this was sOOO UNEXPECTED LIKE WHAT???

user3 ARE WE GOING CRAZY WHAT IS THIS??

alexalbon OMG WHAAAT

yourusername not you idiot you should comment something cute about me alexalbon but you're not cute. actually, at all. you're a fucking menace yourusername minion.

landonorris FINALLY

maxverstappen1 thank god i was getting tired of thirdwheeling

charlesleclerc we all were yourusername oh shut up go kiss or something user4 THIS GIRL-

carlossainz55 congrats, mates

yourusername why are you congratulations us like alex is pregnant or something alexalbon y/n stop

logansargeant you should join us in the podcast the next episode 😊

yourusername OMG YESS I HAVE SO MANY SHIT TO TALK ABOUT ALEX alexalbon pls don't yourusername dw babe i won't!! (logan dm and we record it without him)

[strawhatkia]

lip gloss, lil mama.

INCLUDES ! sero hanta, katsuki bakugo, mirio togata, hitoshi shinsou and hawks x black!reader

GENRE ! fluff

SYNOPSIS ! only after you apply lip gloss, do they wanna kiss from you or, the boys actively mess up your lip gloss !

WARNINGS ! before the war arc, highschoolers are still in highschool, cursing, def self-indulgent on shinsou's part, lemme know if i missed anything!

WORD COUNT ! 1.4k+

A/N ! this is an old request from my deleted account but it's a favorite of mine 🤍 original request look like this -> ”head cannons of Y/N applying a coat of lip gloss on in her room or with her friends and suddenly Bakugo, Shinsou, Hawks, Sero, and Mirio barging in like “My lip gloss senses are tingling” and Y/N’s like “Aht Aht! I just put this coat on, stay back!” She’s just struggling to keep these fools from kissing her and ruining her lip gloss. It don’t matter if she running, struggling, or dodging they kisses (they ruin it with kisses anyways smh)”

MAIN MASTERLIST | BNHA MASTERLIST | TAGLIST

reblogs and comments are welcomed and loved !!

— ☾⋆⁺₊🕸✧ SERO HANTA !

this mofo is the most annoying lil tease ever

the minute you pull out your lip gloss, all of sudden you have his undivided attention

let’s say you were at your desk and he was on the bed on his phone, not paying you any mind

you check to see if he is watching you and luckily he isn’t so you proceed to put it on

and if I know black women as well as I think I do, considering I am one you put a good amount of that bitch; lips all shiny and shit dripping diamonds 

but halfway through, you look up and this motherfucker is staring right back at you

he done sat all the way up, resting on his knees and waiting on you to finish 

he has the audacity to smile when you make eye contact annoying lil shit, even to start giggle when you glare back at him 

he’s the type to let you finish, put the cap on, put the lip gloss away and then swoop in and fuck it all up 

i can not tell you how angry i am right now

“what? got something to say, baby?” “nigga, fuck you.” 

It’s war that you never win unless you know for sure that he is unaware

newsflash: that shit never happens either

you don't even have the option of running unless you ready to be taped to the floor

all he gotta do is whip some out and boom! ya ass is grass!

as soon as you put the lip gloss down, he casually walks over, grabs your cheeks and smashes his lips straight into yours before calmly going to sit back down

lil fucker doesn’t even bother wiping it off for a while either

“thanks for sharing, my love.” fuck this nigga bro

but it’s not like you can argue as much, his kisses are so sweet and if you ever wanted a kiss, just put on some lip gloss; win-win when intentional

plus, all the shawties want this man (can't blame them) so lowkey the lip gloss smears let them bitches know he not single !

— ☾⋆⁺₊🌟🫨✧ MIRIO TOGATA !

as soon as he knows that your about to put some on- he’s there, boi can sense it through the walls and shit

he just knows and now that he does, he will stop at nothing to get to you 

even if you successfully get far away to put it on and have it on for a couple of minutes, the second you are in his line of sight it’s over 

running away is like an unfair game of tag, that bitch cheats

his quirk makes it so easy to get to you and the lil gremlin is so fucking fast (although class 1-a praises your ability to get as far as you did) 

“sunshine~ !” “aht, go play with tamaki or some shit! i just put this on!” “no can do, sunshine!” 

once he’s got you in a pretty tight hold, he grabs your face and messily kisses you and wipes the extra lip gloss off

He then nuzzles into your neck and places kisses there, asking for forgiveness 

“Aww come on, sunshine! You know I can’t resist and plus you can just put more on later!” mirio, lemme go before i slap up upside the head. i can't stand you.” “that’s why you’re sitting in my lap!” “LET ME GO-”

he’s a big ole ball of happiness and just laughs at your frustration, knowing that you can’t stay mad forever (brat knows you love him too much)  

— ☾⋆⁺₊🪶🪽✧ KEIGO TAMAKI / HAWKS !

he comes out of no where and he knows what you doing, shawty

and when he does, one by one, little feathers start filtering into the room, circling around you 

little by little, you start to see the feathers around the vanity you're sitting at

one look in the mirror and you see him standing by the doorway with that sly as smirk ouu i could smack him

“…keigo tamaki.” “yes, dove?” “ you betta get yo feathers outta here, boy” “aw but i think they like you~”

cornball ass nigga 

ofc he doesn't move from his position and neither do his feathers- and don't bother trying to drag it out either, he's been a hero for too long to not know the waiting game

once you’re finished, the feathers stop circling around and just stop in the air, waiting for yo ass to move.

you can try to look for a way out but you not succeeding, them feathers are acting like a barrier, moving when you move and the one controlling them is cheesing like an idiot 

“keigo, baby, come on. i just put this on.” “yeah well, you can just put more on later- i'll even buy you more.” “...bird brain.” “i love you too~”

fortunately, he’s much more neater than the others but that just means he’s taking everything with him when he moves away

and ofc you can't move until all the feathers back off, one wrong move and they will swarm you honey (im telling you the one controlling them don't know how to fucking act)

when the feathers are gone, is when you finally get some hits in

“GOD DAMN IT, KEIGO! THAT’S THE FOURTH TIME TODAY, NIGGA!!” “aww come on, dove! it’s fun to tease you like this!”

he’s laughing so loudly and having such a good time that you pipe down and admit defeat for the fourth time that day (he's beautiful when he's happy so just let it go stink) 

— ☾⋆⁺₊🧨💢✧ KATSUKI BAKUGO !

THIS NIGGA BRO

HE DOESNT EVEN LET YOU PUT IT ON PROPERLY BEFORE HE SWOOPS IN MESSES IT UP

it’s absolutely futile to run from him, he’ll get way too excited and start chasing you down like some animal

“whatcha got there, huh?” “AHT! go on somewhere, bakugo! go mind yo business!” 

he just loves fucking with you and making you angry, it's his favorite past time

it's just you two running all through the dorms, jumping over tables and couches, ducking between people, screaming at the top of your lungs, causing chaos and giving iida a heart attack

once Bakugo has caught you because he will and throws you over his shoulder like a bag of fucking potatoes wit his rude ass, he treks all the back to his dorm and proceeds to literally smash his lips into yours 

after he's done with his short tyranny, he just play-fights you as you try to hit him, smiling like he won the lottery  

“WHY THE FUCK DO YOU ALWAYS DO THIS!” “STOP YELLING, DUMBASS!! IT’S NOT THE END OF WORLD AND PLUS YOU GOT MORE!!” “THAT IS NOT THE POINT, NIGGA!!” 

after a while he kinda forces cuddles upon you until you not angry anymore and it's hard to be when he starts rubbing ya back and sides, pulling you into his chest

do not get it twisted. he does it on purpose b/c he knows that it's real soothing- damn near his tactic every time he does this doesn't stop it from feeling good tho

eventually and as planned, it ends in y'all taking a nap after running around the dorm god knows how many times

“bakugo, i’m still upset witchu nigga.” “no you’re not, now go to sleep”

— ☾⋆⁺₊🐈‍⬛🌀✧ HITOSHI SHINSOU !

ouuuu new contender !

he is the most excited you have ever seen him

the moment you even pull out the lil clear tube of gloss, he's right behind you waiting with a small smile

anyone looking from afar would think it's just a bf looking at his gf reapplying her lip gloss vv lovingly...little do they know

that man is waiting behind you with a damn vengeance and best believe you not even getting far this is time i remind you who his teacher is: AIZAWA !!

"toshi?" "...yes, pretty?" "i swear if you mess up my gloss, we gon have some problems." "what are you talking about? i would never do such a thing." liar.

the moment your compact mirror closes shut is the exact same moment he wraps his arm around your waist and pulls you in close

and he does the whole works: arm around your waist, that hand rubbing your lower back, one hand holding your face as his thumb rubs against the top of your cheekbone while gently getting you to look up at him you guys im being very self indulgent with this

he's just so soft and so so so cute when his lil smirk that when he does kiss you, he doesn't take all of it off, just a lil bit !

he chuckles when he backs away, using his thumb to wipe away any that might have smeared

AND THEN PROCEEDS TO WALK AWAY

"...i hope aizawa whoop yo ass during training today." "ouch, that hurts pretty. it's too bad i'd do it again as long as i get to kiss you." fuck this nigga bro

©STRAWHATKIA ━ all rights reserved. all content published on this blog belongs to starsoir. please refrain from copying, stealing, profiting off my works, or using my works for asmr related work. i don’t allow my works to be used or adapted in any way without my permission.

reblogs and comments are welcomed and loved, so leave some please ! i will respond ! 🤍

wanna read more ??

boyfriend. | f. | katsuki bakugo

taglist : @mypimpademia @sevvnt

[muses-of-the-mind]

enemies to friends—or more—prompts

➼ "Who let the gremlin inside?"

➼ "You inspire me so much." "Aww, that’s so sweet!" "To murder myself."

➼ "Some things were made to be broken." "Like your heart?" "Like your neck."

➼ "Your silence is harmonious to my ears."

➼ "I hate you with every fibre of my body." "Your eyes agree to disagree."

➼ "If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were worried about me."

➼ "You know, I love that I hate you." "And I hate that I love you."

➼ "You are the most annoying thing in my life." "Don’t forget the greatest."

➼ "Is it so hard to believe that I don’t hate you?" "Yes."

➼ "I actually miss you." "Wait what— rewind a bit. That wasn’t according to the script."

➼ "You forgot the part where you tell me you despise me." "Maybe I don’t anymore."

➼ "Well, well, well, if it isn’t the ruler of toads themselves." "W-what?" "Sorry, force of habit."

[sunlightandsuffering]

Sorry to ask but I miss Christmas Chaos so much. I miss little Nico and his shenanigans… when will we get an update on the goober?

AHAHAHA aww it always makes me smile how much y'all like the little gremlins I write lmfao!!

Eren experiences his first fight with his child for the most ridiculous of reasons. Sure, he'd realized that at some point the whole fatherhood thing wasn't going to be sunshine and rainbows and Nico would most certainly have vengeful tantrums. He'd just thought it would be over something more reasonable.

Apparently not.

It's been twenty minute and his child is giving him the stink eye. Bundled up in green gumboots a pair of dinosaur shorts, a blue shirt that proudly declares 'Fisherman', and a neon orange life vest Nico watches Eren expectantly.

"Did you catch anything yet?" Nico demands expectantly and Eren breathes out a sigh, the third time in ten minutes. This is partly his fault though, no one said taking first graders fishing was a good idea. They simply don't have the patience or the prefrontal cortex for it. "No," Nico tells him and Nico's glare somehow worsens, mirroring that of his mother when Eren forgets to take the garbage out or leaves her in the morning without a kiss. "Nico, buddy that's not how this works, we have to wait for a fish," Eren bargains with the little boy.

God he hasn't seeked anyone's approval this hard since high school when he wanted to impress his father after Zeke came back into their lives, fuck. Nico sniffs, turning his head out towards the infinite blue of the lake. The final nail in the coffin is when the little boy drops his fishing rod to the bottom of the boat, toeing it away from his presence like it's personally offended him.

"Nico," Eren tries again, he'd wanted this to be a bonding experience, reminiscing on his own summer days out on the boat with his dad. But now that he thinks about it, maybe he'd been a little older when they'd done that.

"I guess you're not as good as mommy said you were." It's a shot to Eren's heart, and he immediately renews his fishing efforts, reeling his line in so he can cast again. He's going to catch this little fucker a fish if it's the last thing he does, if only out of pure spite at this point. "I'm a great fisherman, I showed you the pictures right?" Nico sends him an almost disbelieving glance, green eyes doubtful before turning back to the wonders of the lake, "You looked a little younger in those pictures daddy, I'm not sure you've still got it." Fuck, children are evil, pure evil, and observant as hell. Everything this kid says is ripping his confidence to shreds because he's not fucking wrong, not in the slightest.

Eren hasn't fished in probably two years. He'd given up the hobby mostly during teaching school, there wasn't time to trek out to the lake or the river for hours on end just to catch a small trout or if he was lucky a bass.

Eren winces, pulling his rod back for another cast, "Why don't you try again with your rod buddy, you'll have fun." "I'm okay," Nico mumbles, leaning over the boat to dip a finger into the water, "I'll just wait for you."

God it's the disappointment that's by far the worst part, who knew gleaning your child's own approval would be so hard.

It's killing him inside, he's gotta catch this kid a fish.

Its not even been an hour since they got out here, maybe 40 minutes maximum.

Fuck, he should have listened to Mikasa when she said he might be a bit young for fishing, why hadn't he listened to the boy's mother? Famous last words. Eren does not in fact catch a fish, no matter how mnay different areas he moves the boat, or how many fish he sees other nearby boatgoers catch, the fish seem to absolutely loathe him today. He goes back to the dock heartbroken, even more so as Nico steps out of the boat primly, going almost immediatley to Mikasa's awaiting arms. She hugs him, that bright smile on her face as she asks them both about their adventures, "How did my boys do? Anything I'll be cooking up for dinner tonight?" "No Mommy, Daddy's not the best fisherman," Nico comments before burying his head in her waist, and Mikasa fucking laughs. She notices his forlorn look a few minutes later when she sends Nico back up to their campsite, and she's borderline cackling as she slides her arms around his waist, looking up at him mischievously. "Bad day?" "He hated it, ugh," Eren groans, dropping his fishing gear to the dock and letting himself be comforted by his very beautiful wife, he's ffucking moping. Mikasa laughs, the tinkling of bells in his ears as she kisses her way up his neck before placing a chaste peck at the corner of his mouth. "That'll happen sometimes, get used to it baby." "It really fucking sucks." Mikasa cackles now, "First time it happened to me was when I brought him to an amusement park. Kid fucking HATED it." "Really?" Eren pulls back, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips, "An amusement park?"

"Yeah, too loud," Mikasa chuckles, "I paid all this money and he was miserable all day, we left early actually." "Seriously?" Eren asks, tugging her further into his arms, his hands not so conspicuously running over her ass. She swats him for it, but she doesn't bother to move his hands. He smiles into the crown of her hair and she snuggles further into him, "Yep, and let's not forget my attempts at tennis lessons, I thought he could be a child prodigy but what a mistake that was." Eren barks out a laugh, "Is that why he's always glaring at the tennis equipment in the garage?" Mikasa nods against his chest, "Yup! he thinks i'm gonna send him back." "Let's hope not." She bites his shoulder playfully, "Well with your luck now Yeager he's going to be glaring at the fishing equipment."

He swats her ass this time and she squeaks, "I've still got time." "That's what I said about tennis." "We could raise a fishing tennis prodigy yet Miki." "Sure." It's nice to know he's not the only one, and he's sure Mikasa feels the same, parenting isn't exactly easy, and despite what his early childhood education classes would have him believe, it's not quite as straightforward as employing Vygotsky and Piaget at every turn and gentle parenting the shit out of kids. Sometimes it's difficult, and disappointing and very much not rewarding when his little gremlin of a child stonewalls him fromt he other end of the boat, but it's still his kid either way and he sure does love the little brat.

[the-kr8tor]

Christmas and boxing day hype got me so tired but i am AWAKE Daily Hobie HC! i feel like you guys are waiting for me to turn this into daily ekko hcs /j Billie and Ramona, being the age where they were bordering on teenagers, were getting more bolder. Specifically, towards their dad, Hobie. Playfights were often now, with each girl taking the time to randomly punch at Hobie's palms at random intervals during the day, while cuddling up to you like they're still needy toddlers on the couch. while you were taking a nap, the twins were busy hatching a little prank on dad to make you laugh, knowing you were in a bit of a tired mood. Mona approached Hobie silently as he was working on a controllable gadget, wanting to be able to bring you snacks even when he wasn't around. She stared at him until he had noticed, a habit which proved to be effective due to how unblinking Mona seemed. She wore a terrible sheet over her head, letting out a monotoned and bored 'boo'. Hobie couldn't help but begin to laugh, feigning fear and overdramatically clutching his invisible pearls. However, his laughter ceased as he felt Billie wrestle him from behind, attempting to wrap him up with a towel. Although he could easily get away, Hobie didn't want to, having too much fun with the ambush his girls set up on him. At first, he thought it was harmless. Little did he know he would have to sit on the floor in shock, in a puffy princess dress, pink frilly ribbons around his wrists and a crown. Billie and Ramona were rolling on the floor, practically cackling with tears in their eyes. Their laughter had woken you up to the scene of Hobie looking incredibly traumatized, as if this was worse than his canon events which included death. Perhaps this was a canon event, because soon you were joining your daughters on the floor. You couldn't help but giggle at his overdramatically sad expression, pecking at his forehead to remind him not to crease his forehead so much. He looked towards you with a glint of adoration in his eyes, uncontrollably smiling at how you couldn't hold in your laughter at the sight of a hot pink princess Hobie. -🐦‍⬛

Fun fact when i was younger i thought boxing day meant that ppl would watch boxers duke it out on the ring after Christmas 😂😂 i hope u had a great holiday!

Daily Hobie HC ❤️❤️❤️

I won't be fully opposed to that 🤔 as long as our hobart still gets his daily hcs 😉 (no worries if you can't!)

Billie and Ramona!!!!! Oh how I missed the gremlins

I love that they hangout with dad like that 🥹🥹🥹

Literally Hobie's kids right there!

Hobie making a little robot to bring you snacks when he's away 😭😭🥹

Aww the little boo from mona 🥺

BAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA that gave me the cutest visual of him in a tutu!! 😍😍

Lmaooo it was his canon event 🤣 r would take so much pictures of him

[woso-dreamzzz]

How are gremlin and kiddo today

Gremlin tried to fight Millie Bright and Niamh Charles after the end of the game and they're all like 'aww, I missed you too!' meanwhile Kiddo had a good time cuddling with Katie and playing dolls with her

[smoft-demons]

Home

“Hey, Mam?” Auva murmurs, looking up at Mammon from her comfortable spot, her head tucked safely under his chin as he squeezes her gently. They��ve been standing quietly in the entrance hallway of the House of Lamentation, hugging for a few minutes by now.

“Wassup, gremlin?” Mammon answers softly.

“You… you ever get that weird feeling… of like, you’re at home. You’re already home, there’s nowhere else that could possibly be home, nowhere else that’s ever BEEN home, but… you’re still homesick? You’re like, in your room, but somehow you reeeeeeally want to go home? But like, how? You’re already home. But you’re still homesick. All you can think about is how very fucking bad you wanna go home, despite already being in your own room. You know what I mean?”

“I… huh. I guess, kinda. Sometimes. Like… I’ve missed my old room from before… yknow. Before all the… everything. Sometimes. Yeah, I get that.” Mammon answers. He unwraps one arm from around her shoulders to stroke her hair. “You okay, baby? Missin’ the human world, huh?” He asks.

“No, no I mean,” she sighs, and buries her face in his shirt. Muffled, she speaks again.

“I mean… I’ve felt that a lot. Back in the human world. I’d be in my own bed, in the room I’ve lived in all my life, and still… somehow, be so fucking overwhelmed by how bad I wanted to go home. I was missing something, I thought. Because why the fuck was I homesick? I needed to find home, and I didn’t know where it was or what I wanted.” Auva pauses for a moment, as Mammon gives her a comforting squeeze.

She speaks again. “I felt like that so often… and then, you hugged me for the first time a few months ago, and I was like, oh. I found it. This is what I wanted. I found home. It was you, Mam. I was missing you, and I didn’t know because I hadn’t met you yet.”

Mammon squeezes her again, much more tightly this time. “Aww, well… shit, human… you’re gonna make me cry, sayin’ shit like that, what am I supposed to…”

Auva squeezes back.

“You don’t have to say anything. I just… thought you should know. I don’t feel that homesickness anymore. Not for long. Because whenever it comes back all I have to do is go find you. And bother you until you hug me.”

Mammon stays quiet. He sniffles. After a minute, he takes one hand off his human to wipe his face, before wrapping it back around her.

“You come bother me anytime, okay?” He whispers.

“Okay. You’re a good big brother, you know? I love you, Mam.” Auva says, hiding her smile against Mammon’s shirt.

“You’re fuckin’ doing this shit on purpose, aintcha?!” Mammon sobs.

He has no intention of letting go of her, not a moment before he has to.

Auva is completely fine with that. She’s home :)

[thegreymoon]

The Story of Minglan

Continuing the Minglan brainrot in the middle of a hellishly busy period that has deadlines that will seriously mess up my life if I miss any of them, but I have no spine and no discipline, so here we are.

***

The only reason Molan still gets to come back to her family home is because the Shengs must keep up appearances and maintain a good relationship with her husband.

I must know if she really understands how her mother died. Does she know that her father beat her to death because of what she helped her do? How does she sleep at night? Is she tormented, or does she think that was an acceptable sacrifice?

***

I was just about to ask, lol.

She looks familiar but I can't place her.

***

I assume it's that pregnant chambermaid who gave birth to her, not Molan?

Hell world, you have to watch your husband have kids left and right with random women and smile about it, but Molan did this to herself.

***

Ah, yes. Chunke.

And Molan is pissed, lol. But, like, what did she think was going to happen? She married this man knowing this. Did she think the baby was just going to vanish into thin air?

***

She's been in this drama for a whole of five minutes and she's already stirring up shit 😠

***

Bitch, die.

***

WTF?

What high-and-mighty air?

I detest this man. He is the worst, as a husband, as a father, as a human.

***

Her garbage father shit all over her good mood, if you must know.

***

No, please, noooooooo!

Anything but that!! 🤣🤣

***

Aww, baby, he wants her to be jealous!

He wants her to love him.

***

LMAO, yeah.

He was so spineless about it. He deserved to lose the girl.

The best he can do is maybe belatedly grow a spine and say no to Cousin Cao and her stupid manipulations.

***

Aww, Nanny is finally pleased with Tingye's choice of wife 😅

***

LMAO, let her sleep, you gremlin 🤣🤣

***

LMAO, how to win a woman's heart 👇

Promise her she can sleep until noon!

I must confess, it would work like a charm on me 😭

***

LOL, no need to give up brothels when you get married!

Just take your wife with you! She deserves to have fun too!

***

LMAO, choke then, bitch.

I love it when Minglan puts these troublemakers into place.

***

LMAO, you self-assertedly wanted to get alone time with the master of the house 🤣🤣

She is off to a bad start. She heard nothing Minglan had said that morning.

The only thing I hate more than evil characters are stupid ones.

[vendettaspathfanfic]

(Art by @ceoofdestructix who gave me permission to use it for this post)

As some of y’all may know it was recently @ceoofdestructix ‘s bday!

I thought they might like a little snippet ft Ursula as a present bc we have talked about how Mama Bear she is and how Ursimian is elite djdhdh and if you too are a fan of Ursula you may like this lil story i wrote!

I call it “Warmth”

A persistent, uncomfortable dryness plagued Ursula's throat, acting as a relentless barrier against the slumber her body craved. The solution seemed simple enough: rise from the bed, shuffle to the vending machine she had noted earlier just a few feet from their motel room's door, and procure a bottle of cold water. However, aside from the weariness that weighed heavily on her eyelids, she was drawn in by the gentle pull from Simon's arm around her waist, as he subconsciously yearned for the cooling presence her ice abilities provided. The late July heat was oppressive, the motel air conditioning was weak, and her powers were a welcome respite.

Ursula, who typically shunned the confining embrace of blankets due to her natural aversion to heat, found herself making an exception on this particular night. The usual discomfort from warmth was absent; instead, Simon's proximity and the protective arm he had lovingly draped over her were unexpectedly comforting. His body heat, mingled with her cooler aura, created a harmonious balance that felt just right.

Embraced by this soothing equilibrium, Ursula weighed her discomfort against the serene moment and chose to disregard her thirst. She made the decision to shut her eyes once more, seeking solace in the cocoon of Simon's warm hold.

Hissssss!

Wait, what the fuck was that?

The mysterious sound ceased as quickly as it had begun, only to be interrupted by her eyes snapping open. She was on the verge of dismissing it as a figment of her half-asleep imagination when it pierced the quiet a second time. This interruption was immediately followed by a shrill "fuck!" The voice was unmistakably that of Toxic, their precociously profane four-year-old companion. What could she possibly be doing awake at this hour?

With a delicate touch, Ursula attempted to extricate herself from Simon's embrace, aiming not to rouse him from his slumber. Unfortunately, even her gentlest efforts could not prevent him from stirring.

“Cm’back…” His voice was a sleepy murmur, muffled by the pillow, his eyelids remaining firmly closed.

“I’ll be right back,” She responded softly, careful to soothe him as she straightened her tank top and prepared to investigate the commotion. “You sleep.”

Simon's response was nothing more than a sleepy grunt, his hand instinctively reaching up to rub the sleep from his eyes. In that moment, another hiss cut through the air, followed immediately by a louder, more frustrated "Fuck!"

“God damn it…” Simon's voice was tinged with exasperation as he let out a deep sigh, realizing it was Toxic once again testing the limits of his patience.

Ursula cautiously peered through the slats of the blinds, her gaze falling upon Toxic seated before the door, encircled by an array of spray paint cans, her arms crossed in frustration, head drooping.

“Aww, lil gremlin…” Ursula's voice softened with compassion, her heartstrings tugged by the sight of Toxic in distress. After ensuring that everyone in the room was decent, Ursula pulled the door open, causing Toxic to startle, a can rolling off her lap in the process.

“Oh, sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you, lil gal!” Ursula's tone remained gentle and soothing. “I’m just checkin’ on ye! What’s wrong?”

“I’m trying to do pictures but nothing’s coming out,” Toxic responded, gesturing towards a can with its lid missing.

“No luck? Did you give the can a good shake?” Ursula inquired, bending down to retrieve the can.

“Where did you get spray paint?” Simon interjected, a note of exasperation evident in his voice as he leaned against the doorway, pinching the bridge of his nose.

Toxic fidgeted with one of her pigtails and absentmindedly tugged at a loose thread on her t-shirt, her voice filled with hesitation as she confessed, “Off the floor. I didn’t shake it, I just wanna draw.”

“You gotta shake it up first if you wanna draw,” Ursula explained with a lighthearted chuckle, vigorously agitating the can in her hand.

“Why?” Toxic inquired, mimicking the action by shaking another can.

“It helps mix the paint so it comes out right,” Ursula clarified. “What do you wanna draw?”

Without a moment's hesitation, Toxic pointed directly at Simon, her little blue tail wagging with enthusiasm.

“R-really?” Simon's heart skipped a beat at the unexpected gesture, though he maintained a stoic facade in response.

“Sergeant Wussypants? Well, you’re the artist,” Ursula quipped with a smile, playfully teasing Simon and earning an eye roll in response.

Toxic took the brown can from Ursula's hand and approached a nearby wall, where she began crafting a large vertical oval.

“Yep, make him great big like that. He’s a tall drink of water,” Ursula remarked with a comedic flair, observing the tiny artist at work.

“He’s not water. He’s a fuckin’ gorilla,” Toxic retorted as she started to fill in the oval with color, eliciting a burst of laughter from Ursula.

“Ah, you've got me there,” Ursula conceded amidst her laughter, casting a sideways glance to catch Simon on the brink of laughter himself. “Careful there, you might crack a smile for once.”

“At what?” Simon replied smugly, his arms folded in defiance.

“Oh, you know what I mean. Or maybe you don’t,” she teased, grabbing a blue paint can. “I’m going to sketch a certain cheeky little girl I know.” With that, she began spray painting a small blue stick figure.

As Toxic reached for the green paint to add the finishing touches to Simon's makeshift portrait, her attention was captured by the figure Ursula had drawn. “Is that me?”

“Mm-hmm,” Ursula affirmed with a nod, her tone warm. “Do you like it?”

“Yeah, I wanna be dressed in green,” Toxic replied eagerly, immersing herself in the task at hand.

“Alright, just pass me the green when you’re ready,” Ursula replied graciously.

After finishing her part with the green spray paint, Toxic handed the can to Ursula and then picked up a white one, extending it towards Simon. “You make Ursula.”

“Listen, kiddo, I don’t-” Simon began, his hand raised in a gesture of refusal.

“You heard her,” Ursula interjected, shooting Simon a pointed look.

With a heavy sigh, Simon accepted the can from Toxic, shook it, and hastily spray painted a rudimentary portrait of Ursula.

Once the trio had completed their impromptu artwork, Toxic couldn't contain her excitement. “We’re done!”

“And it's absolutely perfect!” Ursula exclaimed, her face lighting up with joy as she snapped a picture of the creation with her phone.

“Alright,” Simon said with a faint smile, “time for bed.”

“I can’t sleep,” Toxic groaned, crossing her arms. “It's too hot.”

“It is indeed a warm summer night,” Ursula acknowledged. “But you know my ice powers can help cool things down for you?”

“Really?” Toxic's ears perked up with interest.

“Of course. Head on into our room, and I'll be right there,” Ursula reassured. “Would you both like some water?”

After receiving unanimous agreement for water, Ursula procured three bottles from the vending machine and returned to distribute them.

“Thank you,” Simon offered quietly before turning to the young hedgehog with an expectant look. “What do you say to her, Toxic?”

“Thanks,” Toxic muttered as she struggled to twist open her water bottle.

“You're welcome,” Ursula replied warmly, assisting Toxic in opening the bottle before settling into an armchair in the corner of the room. As she took a sip of her own water, a sigh of relief escaped her lips as the cool liquid trickled down her throat. “Come sit on my lap.”

Toxic nodded in response and climbed onto Ursula's lap, snuggling close to her and finding instant relief in the coolness of her fur.

“Feeling better now?” Ursula inquired softly, running her fingers through Toxic's soft hair with a gentle touch.

Toxic nodded, her eyelids growing heavy as a sense of peace and comfort enveloped her both physically and emotionally.

Ursula cradled the child lovingly, holding her close as she observed Toxic gradually succumb to the embrace of sleep.

Although Ursula typically avoided warmth, there were moments when it held a special significance for her. In this instance, it was the simple, heartfelt connection with a little girl who sought solace in her arms.

The profound sense of comfort in this shared embrace eventually lulled Ursula into a peaceful slumber right there in the armchair.

Simon lay on top of the covers, quietly observing the tender scene before him, understanding the importance of allowing this moment to unfold undisturbed. A gentle smile graced his lips as he gazed at the two figures nestled together in sleep, and he whispered to himself, “Goodnight, girls…”

[roseofithaca]

Favorite Mary scenes? I feel she doesn't get enough love! :)

SHE'S MY FAV (after Robin)!

- "Move over you soppy bit of rag!"

- "RENOUNCE SATAN, WITCH!....Yeah, yeah, that's probably done it."

- "Be there a third option?"

- "YEEEEES!"

- EVERY Mary and Kitty scene! Y'all can all go feral over Cap and Kitty, I love the girls together, I love Mary supporting Kitty standing up to Cap, I love them cuddling in the Christmas ep, I love their little inventory rhyme, I love how they're always cooing over stuff together, I love them playing hide and seek, I love Mary putting her to bed at the party, I just love them so much!

- Likewise, her and Robin's queerplatonic romance is as special as chess husbands to me, if not more. They are trauma bonded chaos gremlins who are down for murder and watching Loose Women, Robin misses his lawyer!

- "They sounds like tiny peoples. Blipblipblip!"

- "Someone here has done nothing wrong!" *walks out singing triumphant*

- "YOU LISTEN TO ME, AL'SON COOPERS!" Scary Smoke Goddess Mary ftw.

- "Aww, the child still lives. Most surprising that!"

- Her joining in the big fight and headbutting Cap as soon as she has an excuse! She's been waiting a while to beat these boys up!

- Her growth from calling a video camera a metal cow to being a director understanding editing!

- How proud she is of Alison for speaking as she wanted to scare the cult people away!

- All her improv but of course her kicking off the dinner scene "yes and", encouraging Robin to try it again - for Alison this time.

- And of course her and Annie! Not enough fics of them, when you know if they were two dudes the fandom would be all over them. Their little wave when they first meet is total Meet Cute. Mary's happiest memory is with Annie. They are wives, your honour.

Could name any scene she's in really, miss her so, can't believe we couldn't get Katy to cameo in the finale, Mary deserved more than a single name drop.

[youuuimeanmee]

RWTGI 34 Thoughts

😆🥰🤗 I've been waiting for Kirishima's past to be translated since forever 😭😭Now I can FINALLY talk about this chapter wkdbjsnsjsjk

Out of all the mysteries presented in this series (the hell's up with Suo Azami, Renji, Yoshino's parents, the brewing yakuza civil war), Kirishima's past is one thing that hyped me up the most; mostly because I've been dying to know the background this insane yet lovable(?) ML lololol.

⚠️ Though the title is Ch 34's Thoughts, I actually started it from ch 33. If you haven't read it then what are you doing here, go to MangaDex if you don't wanna get spoiled here.

⚠️⚠️TW; Bullying, Abuse, Self H4rm, yk how Kirishima is.

👏 Okay! So!

We FINALLY get to see Kirishima's rich ass mommy and daddy 🥳🥳🥳

(tho they don't have a face, I'll take it)

Looks like the parents are busy people, they missed the fact that their son is not normal since birth. That, or Kirishima is just damn good at hiding it. Maybe both.

"My 2 classmates are fighting over irrelevant things. Solution? Erase the thing without anyone knowing. No more things to fight, problem solved 🙂"

He has a shrewd moral compass, I have a feeling he was being genuine when he "helped" his classmates. Aww my cute baby gremlin.

Or if he wasn't being 100% genuine, maybe he tore up the cards to surpress his urges for violence, to ease the boredom he felt because he couldn't feel anything while living in a normal, peaceful life.

The parents slowly realize the abnormal blood that's been there since Gaku era has never disappear from their family.

Since Gaku is the black sheep of the family, Kirishima's dad prob thought: 'Oh fuck this is uncle all over again. No wait I can do this. He already released his energy using a good outlet (karate), he just needs to surround himself with good people. Friends, yeah. The school we picked is the best; surely there's no bad influence that's gonna taint my son. No more psycho #2.' Umm, I hate to break it to you, but daddy-

Ironically, the dad might be the first person who gave him insight about the feeling of having fun by being with a friend. Up until that point, he probably didn't know the feeling he felt when he did the karate. He did it many times, and the dad claimed he liked it, but he never registered it as 'liking something' until it was pointed out to him.

(just like when kirishima threw daggers at yoshino's back until she pointed out he might be jealous of Shoma and he got a little 'ahh that explains it' moment.)

Aww look at that probing eyes, trying to search the answer of his boredom from his dad 🥺

Let's be real Kirishima could really use a proper diagnosis and therapy back then, even right now.

The smile of a child who has found the spark of his life:

LMAO seriously, he smiles because Kodaka can kick hard. The more pleasure (read: pain) he gets from other people, the more he's gonna seek it.

But Kodaka is still weaker than him, so the pleasure ends quickly.

Enter Otogawa.

She's cute. Sweet. More importantly, she's important enough to trigger Kodaka.

She told him all he needed to know about Kodaka. Great in academics, gyms, and karate. Secretly violent too. Just like himself.

"He's just like me, so we matched right? We can be friends! 😃"

Kirishima be like: FUCK YES MORE FRIENDS TO FUCK.

Remember in ch 25.2 when Kirishima told Yoshino he once formed a "friendship plan" that went down the drain?

Whelp, looks like Kodaka is that "friend." We all know how that ends, tho.

Anyways.

Thus, began Kirishima's scheme to ✨️nurture✨️ Kodaka into a person who could kick him harder & also strong enough to not break easily. He befriended (read: flirted) with his crush, lured him into a desolate place, provoked him, stayed docile & easy to kick, yadda yadda.

Really an elaborate plan for someone his age, it's almost cute.

This moment of Kirishima and concealer really highlights his cleverness since he was a kid. If he buys a concealer for his bruise, it's too pricey for his budget. Parents will question unnecessarily if he were caught buying it. Solution? Pretend to return the high schooler's money (even though it's his own) so they'd do the makeup for him. Bruise covered, money covered, no one's gonna know ☺️ Little manipulative shit.

I was gonna feel sorry for him for getting beaten up, but then his innocent, excited smile turned me off so quick. Ugh.

(This is prob the beginning of his exploration to find new "fun" stuff to try. Like choking himself, for example.)

Kirishima is a pathological liar huh. Saying his birthday is in September even though it's in November. This really adds weight to his words earlier that he only revealed his true birthday to Yoshino 🥺🥲

Kirishima's plan to nurture Kodaka is going smoothly in this chapter. Maintaining good relationship with Otogawa, making him jealous and all that.

I bet bringing a 10,000 yen bill is part of the plan too, because kids need the motivation to keep coming back to him. Extorting a broke student is boring afterall.

It's been 300 days since Kodaka had beaten him up? Um. Excuse me what the fuck. With that many injuries, Where are his parents??? Did he ever get questioned at all?? Is Kirishima just that good at lying?? I'm sorry, but I also smell neglection. Intentionally or not.

Moving on, Kirishima is damn good huh. His fights like an adult, prob even better than some yakuza. He's 12. Let that sink in.

(should've seen it coming tbh, but it still surprises me.)

I wanna say he's so disgusting when he ripped the poor dude's ear (where on earth did he learn that?), but he's also my son, so...

Also, the art is so clean. My eyes is blessed, thank you Konishi.

I'm running out of gas. Yeah that's all for today! See you next time 👋

[paranormals-of-ilvermorny]

Chapter 12

“Remind me what the plan is again?”

It was mid-breakfast the next day when the girls reunited and Lorelei told Robin about what she found last night. While eating they discussed what it meant to have the knowledge of Ramona’s name, Lorelei coming up with a plan to use their information for their current mission.

She swallowed her mouthful of orange juice before speaking, “First, we find a way to contact Ramona. Then, we send her a letter asking about her attack; what was it, what did it do, that kind of stuff. We also ask her if there were any other attacks, and if so when. Finally, we send the letter and await its return,” she finished, pretty proud of herself for thinking of such a well thought out plan.

As she spoke, Robin took a few spoonfuls of oatmeal and listened intently, no longer suffering from fatigue. She waited for Lorelei to finish before speaking. “One question.” She said, holding up her index finger. “How do we find out her current address?”

Lorelei smiled wide at her friend’s question. “That is where you come in!” At the raised brow Robin gave, she continued. “You write to your mom and ask her to send a copy of her Oracle Pages. This way we can get her current address and can send her the letter!”

“Hmmm, that’s a pretty good plan, ‘Lei,” she told her friend before blowing on another spoonful of oatmeal. “When do you need the book by?”

She gave Robin a tight lipped smile. “I was hoping by the end of the week?”

Robin’s eyebrows shot up out of shock, but as she continued to eat they settled into a furrow. “Okay, I’ll send it by this evening.” She told her friend begrudgingly.

Happy with her answer, Lorelei continued to eat her breakfast before they had to scurry away to Arithmancy.

“Lorelei, someone’s at the door for you!”

She turned to see Yasmin, a seventh year Serpent alerting her. Lorelei wasn’t expecting anyone to be looking for her so she didn’t have a clue who could be asking for her. Getting up off her spot on her favorite wingback chair, making sure to place a bookmark in her current novel, before she went over to greet her guest.

Upon opening the door, Lorelei found there was a figure wrapped in school robes, the hood pulled up to conceal their face. They weren’t too tall, the top of their head reaching around Lorelei’s shoulders, which gave her some idea as to who it could be. “Package for Miss Raywood?” The figure asked in a deep, gravely voice.

Lorelei rolled her eyes and crossed her hands, the chill from outside the common room seeping in. “What is it Robin?”

“Aww, how’d you know it was me?”

In response, Lorelei just laughed at her friend before beckoning her inside the warm room. They went over to one of the unoccupied tables where Robin revealed a large book from the insides of her robe. Holding the massive book out, she let it drop to the table with an incredibly loud thud, waking a poor student from their nap.

“You got the book!” She exclaimed upon the unveiling.

“Yes I did. Oh, mom said to return it by next week so we might need to write the number down.” Although she nodded her understanding, Lorelei already had her hands on the book. The cover showed a classic black cauldron with a glimmering potion inside. The cauldron’s contents were being mixed by a gremlin who was whistling and stirring as if he wasn’t trapped to the cover of a book. He stopped his whistling and looked up at Lorelei when he realized he was being watched.

“Who’ya lookin’ for?” He asked, his voice gnarled and raspy.

Lorelei didn’t really know what to say so she simply asked, “uh, Ramona Woodly.” The gremlin mumbled something about not getting any privacy before the book opened with no help. The girls stared at the book on the table, flipping through dozens of pages, barely making out the names of wizards and witches on the previous pages. Soon the names got to the W section of the alphabetized names, ending on the exact page they needed, first names starting with R.

“Ramona Woodly,” came the gravelly voice of the gremlin, “looks like you’re outta luck, kid.”

Upon reading the names of the book, Lorelei and Robin didn’t quite understand what he meant by saying they were ‘out of luck’. It wasn’t until they saw the number of Ramona’s did they realize the gremlin’s words.

“There’s gotta be at least ten of them!” Exclaimed Robin, pointing to the many similar names, all with different addresses.

Lorelei gulped before speaking. “Who knew Ramona Woodly was such a popular name?” She placed her finger under the first Ramona, then began to count as she slid down. Twelve, there are twelve ‘Ramona Woodly’s in the book. How they were gonna find the right one was going to be a challenge, but hopefully it won’t take that long to write and receive twelve different letters.

“Uh, Lorelei?” Robin asked, tentatively so as not to scare her already distressed friend more. “I hate to pour honey in your already sticky situation,” she began, wringing her hands out of nervousness, “but I just realized, what if Ramona doesn’t even live in Massachusetts anymore?”

Despite her shocked expression from the number of imposters, Lorelei’s eyes seemed to grow even larger, the only thing that told Robin she heard her question. A million thoughts filled her mind, and all of them berating her for coming up with such a flawed plan. Stupid, of course there’s more than one Ramona Woodly! And maybe she doesn’t live in the state anymore, what then? Oh, I never should have thought of such a dumb plan before working out all of the kinks, Robin probably thinks I’m an idiot!

As if reading her mind, Robin placed a gentle hand on Lorelei’s shoulder, giving her a soft squeeze to remind her she’s there. “Lei, if you want, I could help you write some of the letters? Ya know, make the work go faster?”

Her words brought Lorelei back to the present instead of the spiraling hole she was just in. “You wanna help? Even though you hate writing anything that’s not for school?”

“Well, it’s important right?” She reasoned, a smile starting to bloom on her face. “It’s not just a random letter, it’s to find out about the attack, to stop another one from happening again.”

Lorelei looked at her friend and the determination sparkling in her blue eyes, feeling some of it jump across and infect herself too. Her features softened and Lorelei wrapped her arms around her friend’s slightly shorter frame, Robin returning the effort. “How did I get so lucky for a friend like you?”

“Ha, I ask myself that every day.”

“I’m such an idiot,” Lorelei mumbled into her friend’s hair, “what if I mess up and don’t for see another flaw later on?”

“First of all you are not an idiot,” Robin told her, pulling back a bit to look her in the eye. “You are one of the smartest people in our grade. You think Merlin never forgot to put a cork in his potions?” This made Lorelei laugh, the reaction Robin was hoping for. “And if you do forget something or mess up, I’ll be right here to help pick up the pieces and make a new plan. You aren’t alone in this, ‘Lei.”

Warmth spread through Lorelei’s body at the endearing words her friend gave. It also filled her with a renewed desire to crack down and find the answer to their problems, willfully accepting Robin’s help to save as much time as possible before another student gets hurt.

“Well,” Lorelei sighed out, “I guess we should start asap.” Then, with a quirk of her brow, “What are you doing tonight?”

A few days later and all twelve Romana Woodly letters were written and sealed in their envelopes, ready to be carried to their respective owners. Holding the letters in her hand, a very bundled up Lorelei was making her way to the owelry to send them off.

On her walk she remembered the words written on every letter, hoping at least one of them reaches the right person. It took some trial and error, but eventually Lorelei had perfected what she wanted to say.

Dear Miss Woodly,

If you are not an Ilvermorny class of ‘64 graduate, please discard this letter. I sincerely hope this letter reaches you, your name is very popular it seems.

You do not know me, but my name is Lorelei Raywood and I am curious about a certain accident that occurred to you during your time at school. I’m a current fifth year student and by chance have learned your name after reading about your encounter in a book about dangerous creatures. I dearly hope you know what it is I am talking about, and can understand my vague definition. If you do not mind, and the incident does not trigger any negative thoughts, I would greatly appreciate it if you could answer some of my questions regarding the “animal”.

What exactly happened, and where around the school grounds?

How did your silver necklace affect the creature?

Did you tell the headmaster?

Again, if you cannot recall or if these memories are too overwhelming, considering it has been years since it happened, I completely understand and only hope for your wellbeing. Thank you for your time, any reply will help.

Sincerely,

Lorelei Raywood Class of ‘00

P.S. Have you continued your photography?

After giving the working Pukwudgies her letters, Lorelei made her way back to the warmth of the castle, already thinking about how she wanted to spend the evening sipping on hot tea and reading.

Goodness knows her wrist needs it.

Over the next week, classes took up the majority of Lorelei’s headspace that the anticipation of the letters had no room to fester.

During potions the class made Alihotsy Draught, which poor Professor Teagarden had to watch with an eagle’s eye to make sure no class clown tried a sip. Robin had a difficult time cutting up the plant’s stem, known for being leathery and tough, so Lorelei stepped in and the two dissected it with little difficulty. However, there was one point when a bit of the plant’s juice sprayed the girls in the face, causing hysterical giggles to erupt between them. All in all, a pretty good class.

Later, during charms, the class had fun trying to decode what Professor Dollee had written by practicing Aparecium on several different pieces of parchment. Lorelei had some trouble with it at first, but soon got the hang of the motions. One piece of parchment, Lorelei flicked her wrist to reveal the message, only for the paper to read ‘I heard there was a solar eclipse soon, didn’t realize it was your big head’, which seemed out of place for a teacher to write. Sure enough, after a frown formed on her face, the annoying high pitched laughter of Claire and her friends could be heard, the tell-tale sign she planted the message. Robin, having been seated next to Lorelei and read the decoded message, discreetly casted ‘Calvorio’ onto Claire who screamed when she realized a very prominent bald spot appeared on her head. This caused the whole class to laugh, and for Claire to run out of class to the nurse, her friends running after her saying how it didn’t look that bad.

When the girls had Magizoology, they tried to reconstruct the skeleton of a small sea serpent. It resembled a fish, reminding Lorelei of all the times her dad would cook and debone fish at home during the summer. With multiple arched bones that acted as its ribs and connected by one long spinal column, it was easy to see this serpent was around half a foot long. Professor Azarola told the working students how a sea serpent could reach lengths of twenty feet long, and prefer sea water rather than fresh.

Robin in particular had fun expanding the wide jaw of the snake, resembling its land cousin by opening its jaw by unhinging to swallow small fish and shrimp whole and alive. Once everyone’s skeleton was complete, and everyone’s hands were covered in glue, the professor said they could donate the skeletons to the classroom or keep them. Lorelei decided she did not want nightmares of sea snakes gobbling her up, and instead chose to give hers away.

Between classes, the girls got a chance to speak with one of their friends, Rain Knotts. His kinky hair having grown a bit over the summer, his eyebrows were still fairly unkempt, and slightly sculpted cheekbones were very becoming of his face. Lorelei always made it a priority to keep her friendship with Rain, not that he was the only other black student, but one of the ones she got along with best. It was always nice to have someone in your corner.

Rain asked the girls if they would be going to the Wampus’s yearly Halloween party, to which they looked to one another. While being near Claire, a proud Wampus, was difficult it certainly wasn’t worth missing the best party of the year over. Besides, they agreed, with the number of students and size of their common room, there was little to no chance of even seeing her. With a farewell to Rain, they continued their walk to their next class.

The day was cold and it only got worse as the sun began to set, golden rays of the late October sun ghosted into the Thunderbird common room. It was a pretty lazy afternoon with no one around causing too much of a ruckus by swinging or climbing on the different equipment.

Robin lounged with her arm over her eyes to shield the light, taking a well deserved nap before dinner after studying hard for her herbology quiz. Well, she reread her notes, which was a lot for her. So she figured a few shut eyes would help the information sink in. The sound of Quinn scribbling on some parchment in front of her and the sound of hushed voices nearby served as the soundtrack that Robin slowly started to drift off too.

Unfortunately, any hope for a nap was lost when Lorelei rushed into the common room with some envelopes.

“WAKE UP!! WE GOT LETTERS!” She rudely announced, clearly more excited than her resting friend.

“Oh sweet mistress of sleep, how you elude me,” Robin muttered before sitting up to open the envelopes.

Lorelei plopped down onto the sofa next to her and placed the envelopes on the coffee table that Quinn was just writing on, she too scuttled near having had her interest peaked. Before the three girls lay four envelopes, and Lorelei wished with all hope that one of them had what she was looking for.

After opening and reading them, it was apparent that some Miss Woodlys felt the need to respond. Two of the letters said they weren’t students of Ilvermorny, but appreciated the letter regardless of the mistake, and one clearly stated they graduated class of ‘73 but continued to answer the questions about an ill encounter they had with a Muggle’s chihuahua. Thankfully, the last letter contained everything they were hoping for and more. But it also left Robin and Lorelei with more unease than before.

“Dear Miss Raywood Class of ‘00,

I must say, I’m amazed to have received such a letter, and from such a young woman as yourself. I can tell through your writing what a dedicated student you must be. As per your question, yes, I am still a photographer and even have a job working for the Boston Stake. You know, the newspaper?

As per your other questions, yes, unfortunately I do still recall that attack. I was out in the woods looking for a Chickadee with two heads that some younger years said they saw when out playing in the snow. I wanted to get a picture of it to enter the Stake’s Wild Near You contest of natural anomalies. Unfortunately, I never snapped a picture of that bird. Instead I found some weird looking tracks, just as the sun began to fall over the mountain. They looked almost bird-like, like a giant owl.

I remember the violet color of the snow so vividly, how the trees casted long shadows, walking around between the Wampus den and the Old School Ruins. Somewhere behind me I heard the crunch of it as something big got nearer. I recall being knocked down by the thing and tried to get away but couldn’t, feeling paralyzed by what I saw in its eyes. Looking up, I was horrified. What can only be called a monster was looking down at me with these huge orbs that shone the absolute scariest thing back at me: at the time my mother was gravely ill, and in its eyes I could see her dying by herself in the hospital room. By some miracle, it tried to grab a hold of me in my occupied state, but my silver locket burned the skin of its talon. It let out a horrifying screech, giving me enough space to get away and run back to the castle. Once I returned, I tried to tell people what happened, but no one would believe me. Then I thought maybe my camera caught a picture of it, but upon checking the whole thing had been crushed in my fall.

My, all of those memories I had put out of my mind seemed to have found a new home again. That is no fault of yours, dear, simply the way the subconscious works. As for your other questions, the first thing I did the next day was go straight to Headmaster Pope’s office and told him the exact thing I just told you, but with more detail given how fresh the incident was. He told me that it would be looked into over the upcoming winter break, so I left it in his hands. What had happened still rattled me the rest of the year, never feeling safe enough to go past the woods alone, and soon enough it was May and I had graduated. I even asked my now wife, then girlfriend, about that time and she agrees how scared I was afterwards. She even recalled me writing to my mother every week, promising to visit everyday after graduation, but she didn’t know why. I still wear my locket daily, maybe because I internally feel like if it could protect me then, it can protect me from anything. I still never learned the name of that thing.

I wish you all the best in your studies, don’t forget to enjoy every little moment, you don’t realize how much you will miss it. I know I still yearn for their yearly Thanksgiving feast!

Best Regards,

Ramona Woodly

P.S. My wife and I also remember there was a seventh year boy during our first year that said he too was attacked by something in the woods, but everyone just thought he was pulling their leg and trying to make a joke. If it helps, his name was Harrison Cuttler, and I’ve attached his address. Wish you well!”

[sithwitch13]

AEW Dynamite 10/2/24

Aaaa starting with BCC giving me life and drama

"We have big plans for you, Yuta." Cult shit, I am so here for cult shit

Taz news? Is Taz ok?!

Yay Nigel though!

Yooooo Ricochet vs Ospreay to start!

That look from Takeshita aaaaaaa

Yaaaaay not having to use Fite any more, though I may still keep it for GCW.

LOL NIGEL SAYING HE TRICKED DANIELSON I WILL DIE

Wtf

Okay thank you for making them both look strong without having a dumbass draw finish

SOUP NO

At least it's a finish we're meant to hate

Mercedes and Kamille and Renee look so pretty omg

Mercedes is such a fun obnoxious villain, I can't help but love her

YOOOO MVP ALLYING WITH MERCEDES

AEW is full of cunty little brats and i love that so much for us all. I want to see them all together at a bitchy Regency tea party.

HANGMAN VS THE GUNNS YOOOO

Oh christ the elementary school play trees are back

Conglomeration my loves

Please move on from this feud, it has been so many months

Biiiiiitch

Darby open challenge? Hmmm.

HANGMAN TIME

His pants keep tricking me into thinking he's back to the panties but it's never true

Angry Cowboy Murders Literal Muppet

HANGMAN DON'T YELL AT AUBREY

Oh, they're writing Taz off so he can get knee surgery, got it

"It was a great match. That you lost." God I love Bitchy Schiavone.

Oh shit he's hanging people again

THE KNIFE PERVERT IS BACK!!!

JACK PERRY VS SHIBATA GIMME IT

I hate that the women's match is the one I'm looking forward to least but I just can't with Serena Deeb

Not the hugest Britt fan either but I do have a soft spot for her. The "chubby Whataburger faces" promo was my first ever live show and I do in fact love (and miss) Whataburger.

Mariah! Also lol at Nigel

Yay Queen Aminata!

Angry Hook

CHRISTIAN

Willoooooooow!!!

Yay Private Party! Yay Iron Savages!

That Bucks/Private Party match was the first ever match I saw on AEW. Good memory.

Aww my fancy gremlin boys!

Matthew is growing ever closer to that one drawing of him I did

YOOOOOOO SHELTON BENJAMIN

I love them antagonizing Nana specifically

Oh god Brodie Lee I am going to cry

DANIELSON VS OKADA HERE WE FUCKING GO

I love Nigel so much.

Schiavone like "I am so tired of your shit, Nigel"

One of my shoulders hasn't been sitting right this week and I wish someone would do that shoulder thing to me

Okada's flip off zoom-out still pops me

RRRRRAAAAHHH DOING EACH OTHERS' MOVES

Aaa BCC looking on

Is it me or does Claudio look proud?

Aaaaaaaaa

AAAAAAAA

YOOTS

I am so stressed

I'm gonna die

I AM GONNA DIE

Oh thank god Yuta is a good boy

[thefamilyeldritchabomination]

Short Story: Midsummer Pt. 2

Freddy’s head tilted back a bit while inside of the van, his eyes beginning to shut for a quick nap thanks to the prepping going on. It’ll be nice to enjoy summer down in Resembool, the lilacs should be in bloom down there with their calming spiced fragrance. That was something that both Freddy and Dolly had been looking forward to once in Resembool, the lilacs have always been a massive prize of sorts to the family. With the thoughts about the lilac bushes, Freddy smiled softly as he slowly started to drift into sleep before being abruptly woken up by a shrill screech and some grotesque face pressed up closely to the old man’s face. The shock startled Freddy back into waking up and looking at the hideous hand puppet pressed up against his face. The lipstick was caked on horribly on the fabric of the puppet’s lips with a messy yarn wig on top and googly eyes bouncing all over the place as a familiar grin of the puppeteer appeared from over the seat. “Goddamnit Greed! Why the hell did you do that!?” Freddy screeched, nearly jumping out of his own skin from the puppet based intruder.

 “Because this is the prettiest Dante Puppet I’ve made for my circus act so far! I no longer need to use super glue on my hands for the eyes.” Greed grinned stupidly as Freddy glared at him for the interrupted nap.

 “Yeah that thing sure is a fucking super model level of gorgeous there Greed…” Freddy only deepened his glare at the hideous little fabric monstrosity as Greed could only laugh away.

 “Yah think? I should really enter her into the Miss Universe pageant then.” Greed was grinning away at his horrible masterpiece of garbage theater.

 “Greed, why are you pestering the Face Fur? That’s my job in this household.” Envy had arrived with their gremlin survival pack as Ernest and Dorian followed them into the van.

 “Aww I wasn’t pestering, I was just showin’ him my newest puppet.” Greed pouted that he can’t do his older brother style of pestering Freddy anymore. “That thing? Seriously?” Envy wrinkled their nose a bit at the puppet of horribly done makeup and style. “What? Don’t you think she’s the prettiest lady ever?” Greed faux pouted as he held the wretched construct. “It belongs in a bonfire.” Envy plainly said, wanting to toss it into a fire the moment they made it to Resembool.

 “That’s the one thing I can agree on with Envy.” Freddy said, in awe of being in a time where he could actually agree with the green jackass with bad naming skills. “Nevermind, Greed, you get to share a room with Face Fur for the trip.” Envy noped right out with being on the same level as that Face Fur.

 “I think my grandkids would be up in arms over that one.” Freddy sourly said, making Envy flinch a bit at the fact Freddy had in fact managed to spread his seeds and multiplied much to their disgust.

 “Mertle is such a tacky name for a grandchild..” Envy grumbled their disgust over the naming of the Freddy progeny. 

 “It's better than the name ‘Grody Gertie’ that you seem to be obsessed with.” Freddy fired back, catching Greed’s full attention at such a marvel of bad names.

 “Dude, seriously, you were pushing for that name? Why?” Greed was fully ready to pick on Envy over the name, big brother mode fully activated.

“Envy wants another clay construct, told them if they can come up with a better name with Dolly, I’d reconsider it.” Freddy explained before Envy could get a word in edgewise. 

 “You realize Envy is a stubborn asshole, right?” Greed pulled up the grotesque little sock puppet, using the obnoxiously high pitched voice as he moved its mouth.

 “Yes and don’t ever use that ugly fucking thing ever again.” Freddy begged as he fought the urge to rip the puppet apart with his teeth.

 “Oh my..” Dolly said as she arrived with her luggage and the snack box, looking at the ugly puppet in horror.

 “Dolly, I got good news!” Envy interrupted to avoid that spotlight stealing cloth crime from ruining everything.

 “You apologized to Freddy and became good friends?” Dolly asked hopefully as Ernest and Dorian scampered up into the transport van for the train station. “No! I got Face Fur here on board with making us a third clay construct! All we have to do is come up with a far more superior name than Grody Gertie together!” Envy smiles widely showing off their awful, awful teeth for all involved.

 “Well…that was progress still..” Dolly said, a bit grateful that the name of ‘Grody Gertie’ was officially off the table.

 Freddy shook his head, all hopes of having a restful nap dashed away as the four noisy trouble makers and Dolly were now in the vehicle. It would be another half hour or so for the rest of the massive Mancer family to load up for the long journey ahead. Once everyone was aboard the line of vans, the vehicles started to take off for the train station to ride into Resembool in. Ever since the day that airplanes were declared as a form of transportation, Dolly had been firmly against boarding one. The combination of being in a cramped small space, thousands of miles up in the air, and the fact these things could violently explode made Dolly fearful of this form of transport. There was absolutely no convincing of Dolly otherwise on the matter, planes were the bane of her existence and were the devil in Dolly’s mind. Trains were the only way to go when the whole family was involved and stayed that way as the vans pulled up to the station. The station braced itself as the swarm of Mancers stormed its halls, tickets in hands trailing with luggage behind. The Mancer family had essentially bought out the entire train from how much they multiplied over the decades as they all boarded in. Greed, Envy, Freddy, Ernest, Dorian, and Dolly boarded the cabin, situating themselves for the long ride ahead. 

 “So what do you think of Carnage as a name?” Envy offered as they wanted to give their clay construct a violent name to make up for a possibly cute-ugly appearance. “I think I’d have to politely veto that one.” Dolly wasn’t going to let Envy name their clay construct after a synonym for massacre. “Okay okay, how about Despair?” Envy always felt that Despair would’ve been a great Homunculus name. “No, we’re not going with Despair as a name.” Dolly shot that name down right away, feeling like it’d give the construct depression. “Then what about Bloodbath?” Envy was getting desperate to name the construct after something truly terrible. “I say this in the most loving way, but that sounds like a metal band name that we’d likely play air guitar with. Let’s name our sibling ‘Fairfax’ after our favorite cartoon dragon!” Ernest interjects, wanting in on the naming scheme. “Please name our baby sibling ‘Fairfax’! It’d be so funny to name our sibling after a cartoon!” Dorian supported his brother on the conquest of naming their younger sibling after a cartoon dragon for laughs.

 “I’ll consider it, for now.” Envy huffed to humor their favorite boogers, considering having ‘Despair’ as a middle name instead as a compromise.

 “That's strangely the most reasonable name I’ve heard during this topic..” Freddy said in surprise that the awful clay lions could come up with a better name than Envy.

 “You’re telling me, I was expecting Puke Master Three Thousand from the dogs..” Greed was just as surprised as Freddy even though the construct would be named after a popular cartoon dragon. “We’re lions, LIONS.” Dorian glared, the temptation to bring back the yellow jackets was strong, very strong at this point.

 “Chill, I was just pulling your legs.” Greed pouted that no one appreciated his absolutely funny joke. “Changing it back to the topic, I rather like Fairfax, that’s a lovely name.” Dolly said, trying to prevent a full on train brawl.

 “Well Face Fur, you heard Dolly, we both agree on Fairfax as the name.” Envy went for the throat, wanting to get that clay construct made and the fact everyone did in fact like ‘Fairfax’ as a name.

 “I hate that you all managed to come up with a better name, but a deal is a deal. I’ll make the construct AFTER the family vacation.” Freddy relented, dreading the fact there was a chance the new construct could take a bite out of his flesh like before with Ernest.

 “Perfect, we get to have a shared construct.” Envy wrapped a scaly arm over Dolly, grinning away at the success of getting a third construct as Ernest and Dorian slammed a very gross sounding high five.

 Freddy sat there, gears turning on a design that he knew Envy would be pissed about along with making sure the construct would be aesthetically pleasing for Dolly. Glitter, tons and tons of glitter will be used in the construct, making it shine more than a disco ball. A smile spread on Freddy’s withered old face as he decided on not only making it glittery, but also a unicorn, would fit in with the alchemy theme going on along with Dolly adoring unicorns. Perfect, simply perfect in Freddy’s mind as Greed pulled up a box like object with a handle and dials. The screen was shiny as the rest of the group checked it out in awe as Greed turned on the box to display a television program. 

[parttimepuff]

PARTY TIME? I brought those soft cookies people say they all hate but actually like and also king fu panda let’s get unreasonable and use your new citizenships to get formally charged with disturbing the peace WOOOOOOOOOOO

">I’ll take that movie-" Lor announced, a port on her console opening up for it to be placed in. "Yesssss, a classic." Gremlin happily took the film, bringing it over so the AI could play it. Beep found herself more intrigued by the cookies, not having tried this sort before. "Oh, nice! Now we've got more choice for treats!" Luna exclaimed, having set her own creation on a table with a bunch of other snacks.

Already holding some beeper bites, Beep picked up and took a bite of a lofthouse cookie. Her eye widened. "Pretty good, huh?" Reverie prompted. The Matter answered with a low frequency buzzing sound as Lor got the movie playing. "Glad you like 'em!" Her father chuckled. Though not able to entirely understand her first language, he was at least getting the gist.

'Yeah!! Super good!!' Orbee chimed in, munching on a beeper bite as they eyed the other snacks. "Aww, thanks!" Luna beamed, glad her cookies were still well liked. Turning from the screen to the others as it went through very old movie previews, Gremlin grinned. "You guys are gonna love the movie, promise." He insisted, excited to be sharing it with them.

Glancing around the bridge, Beep found herself smiling wide with the rest of them. This was what she'd been working so hard for, what they all had been. "I got the popcorn!!!" Magolor shouted, the large bowl held high over his head like a trophy. "Awesome!!!" Gremlin cheered, shifting their snack table around so they had room for it. "Movie, snacks, family. This is how to party!" His niece exclaimed.

'Yeah!! I love parties!!!' Orbee agreed, bumping into her affectionately. "And I-agh-love you!" Beep reciprocated despite the high positivity starting to make her feel ill. Something that didn't go unnoticed. "Ah… Just let us know if we need to calm down, ok? OR if you need space, we all totally get it." Reverie reminded her, Magolor nodding and taking it to heart himself. He already had a bit off space between himself and the rest.

"But if I do, then I’ll miss the MOVIE." Beep protested. "We can pause whenever, don't worry about it." Gremlin offered. None of that was enough to dissuade her, holding Orbee like a pillow, clearly hyped on sugar. "Mooooovie." The Matter insisted. 'Movie!!' Her sibling echoed. The previews, having run their course, finally gave way to the film itself. "Heh, movie it is." Reverie relented. Though silent and in the corner away from the rest, Hermit watched on, a cookie in one hand, as the movie began.

[tiressian]

thought abt this little scenario following melon's missing blankie.

they find it half an hour later then comes the challenging part of escorting melon to her room (just gonna assume she's a girl for now) and convincing her to sleep alone. the task falls to Gojo, much to his chagrin, but he loves her too much anw. and the father-daughter convo goes like:

"You're a big girl now. Big girls sleep on their bed."

"But i still want to sleep with you and shoko." Melon looks up at him.

"You call her mommy, Melon (I can't think of a name, ok! don't kill me)" Gojo reprimands lightly

"Why? you call her shoko?"

"yes, but you can't"

"why? Melon's a big girl now"

"not big enough"

"so she can sleep with you and mommy?" melon implores innocently.

"no, she's big enough to sleep alone."

"dad, tell me, you're a big boy, then why do you still sleep with mommy and I can't."

Cuts to Gojo getting an epiphany about how they created a mini shoko, much to his pride and doom. then the next years of his life starts doing a montage in his mind showing an adult and a lil gremlin created in the former's image roasting him for as long as he lives.

lol, and in true dramatic gojo fashion, he laments all this to shoko after finally convincing their daughter to sleep alone - "our sex life's doomed!", "timing is optimal shoko! how-", "I'm done, she's gonna roast me, there's two krakens now." and through all this shoko just looks at him, smiling knowingly, finding his lil rant cute, like 'you get what you bargained for, 9 months for at least 9 years of your life'

this. i love it, so cute!

aww 🥹 a mini shoko would be so cuuuute, big brown eyes that have an iridescence to them, barely 80cm tall, wearing agumon pyjamas and still managing to hold 50 kinds of ordinances on this 190cm tall man with zero effort hahaha