#and average horse training practices are still aversive based bc of tradition

[asdpawprint]

Today in therapy, we developed a metaphor comparing me to a traumatized horse that goes into fight or flight over the slightest touch on the lead rope. And work is an average horse trainer interacting with me.

A great trainer would take many steps back, let the horse loose in a pen and just sit with it for as long as it takes to develop a sense of safety and trust. After that, they would slowly build back up to wearing a halter and lead rope, and counter condition the lead rope so leading becomes a safe and comfortable feeling. That's the magic wand scenario (unrealistic wishes for how life could be better): taking a long term break from work to develop a sense of safety in everyday life and accumulate enough maturity/capacity to cope with raising the expectations again years later.

But we're talking average traditional horse trainer, who expects this horse to do its job asap, but also wants minimal stress reactions while doing so. What can be improved without taking steps back?

If you stay just where you're at, slight touch on the lead to create movement, for long enough, then eventually the panicked leap forward will shut down into a tense walk. But the emotions are still the same, and the problem will be explosive again when the bar rises.

What's the in between? How can we improve the emotions without taking steps back? How can I develop feelings of safety while still doing my job?