#and around him are nadja Lazlo and the guide

[to-be-loved-by-death]

a private ceremony

plus a slightly brighter version of anyone is curious of the background ^

[nellie-elizabeth]

What We Do in the Shadows: Sleep Hypnosis (6x03)

This was delightfully chaotic!

Cons:

I feel like I said this a lot in last season's reviews, but the Guide feels generally useless as a character. I hadn't even really noticed that she hadn't been around much in these first few episodes. I really wish they could give this character something cooler to do! The actress is so funny!

Pros:

This was my favorite of the three episodes so far. I just really loved the premise. It feels very classically sitcom-ish in that it has one central conceit and it runs wild with it. The subplot and main plot don't really have distinction, it's the whole gang all caught up in the hypnosis situation, but just coming at it from different angles. Colin as the instigator here really made me laugh! His wall where he's got everything all mapped out and shows how he's losing ground in the group dynamic was so silly. I love that he positions himself as the lone man out, because previously there were two united pairs in the house - Lazlo and Nadja, and then Nandor and Guillermo. Pretty insightful of you, Colin Robinson...

And then just all the fun hypnosis shenanigans! Everyone having their own realization moment about the hypnosis, the Baron hypnotizing himself, the moment when everyone had forgotten each other but the one thing they did remember was the argument about what to do with the space under the stairs... everyone being horny for everyone when they couldn't remember one another... the bit with the phone translating Nandor's language when he reverted back to his factory settings, so to speak... all of this was so funny.

Then we get to chase it with the bittersweet ending, when Guillermo, hypnotized by accident, reverts back to being an eager guy hoping to become a vampire's Familiar on his road to getting turned into one himself! Nandor was so pleased to have Guillermo eager and impressed by him for the first time in years. Man, I don't trust this show to actually go anywhere with this relationship or end the show with any huge status quo shift, but I do hope I'm wrong and we get something juicy...

Three episodes down, which means only a handful left before this show is gone for good! I'll miss it!

9/10

[memelord1642069]

Actually I am happy that Nandor gave Guillermo a choice, I feel like past Nandor would have just used a wish without asking.

Despite the sort of running joke that nothing ever changes, I feel like the thing that does change are the relationships. They're all much nicer to eachother (well they might need another minute for the guide).

This season, the fact that all the vamps kept the secret?

Lazlo's experiments, his guilt at failing?

Nadja tearing through the clinic to get him?

Nandor not even being able to hide how down bad he is anymore?

The way they all came to his motel to be genuinely nice, in their own ways?

The ending made it look like everything was going back to the way it was, Guillermo's back to cleaning up after them and all that, but then Lazlo offers to help, and he's so nice about it? That would have NEVER happened in the previous seasons.

Maybe because the characters are changing, the situation will have to change as well? Maybe they'll have changed too much for things to go back? At least I hope.

Also competent Nandor this episode? He was actually threatening? Like when he decided he didn't want to kill Guillermo and and he actually went to his mom's house and called him? Because he knew he wouldn't refuse to come when it's like that? The TENSION with that whole stake thing?

The fact that he made up this whole little ceremony to give Guillermo a choice. He just had a pair of Guillermo's glasses in his pocket?? Not to mention the sweater clutching when he thought Guillermo was gone? I suppose he actually does know Guillermo better than anyone. I'm still sad we didn't get anything less subtle, but the nandermo shippers have been eating this season!! (Myself included)

Also I almost forgot because of all the huge shit happening in the episodes, but I'm glad the guide finally got to yell at the gang for mistreating her. Honestly sort on brand for her to get overshadowed by bigger things happening.

Also Guillermo wanting so much to be a vampire but not having the guts for it in the end? Oof, feelsbadman. I wonder if he will actually become a vampire by the end of the series, this time not out of desperation, but properly after having thought it through, after finding out what he really wants, and being turned by Nandor. Maybe then it would feel right.

I know that Guillermo doesn't like killing, but I'm sure we could get around that? I wonder is it possible to drink blood from someone without killing them? Take a couple sips and leave the rest? Have the gang save some aside for him in a bottle? Blood banks?

And then nandermo. Will they truly become canon? I hope so. What if the next season nandermo become canon and in the end Guillermo has a reason to become a vampire other than vampires are cool. Many people have also brought up something happening to Guillermo and Nandor having to turn him to save him as a last resort, although I don't like that one as much cause it sort of takes away Guillermo's choice.

Or just Guillermo becomes a witch to stay eternally young, to stay with his vampire family.

[whomstwedointheshadows]

Season 6 Wish List:

Nandor and Silvia pick out surrogates. Nandermo Reveal by the ensuing conversation, where Guillermo says telling Nandor to Breed Him in the middle of sex is not the same and the whole would-he-Sire-offspring thing was in the middle of a vampire/familiar roleplay! Intent was not clear! Nandor says during their prolonged marriage negotiations which you are spoiling right now, Guillermo, his mother demanded grandchildren, he is doing his best here to be modern about all this.

Bonus points if Guillermo walks in on the debate of Surrogates at the Staten Island House, the whole vampire clan is involved advocating for the best one, Silvia as judge. Guillermo was unaware, but finally understands why Nandor expected him to give his semen to the witches, too. Guillermo was getting weirded out by how specific everyone was getting about the new potential familiar’s diet during the interviews, but thought it was their attempt to show care by figuring out what humans needed. {That, or Nandor shared with the house what he was thinking during blowjobs- and Guillermo terminates that thought}

I really need someone explaining artificial insemination (while Guillermo is gone) to the vampire household, voting they need another supernatural baby and Lazlo swearing not to raise this one into an energy vampire, believing slayer genes will make it hardy. Guillermo is out of town on quest, unaware why everyone’s so caught up with ‘witches and bitches’ until he hears his mother fully on board, defending her grandchild as ‘not un-holy’ to a goth surrogate looking forward to carrying unholy spawn, who misread the situation as an Alister Crowley-anti-Christ summoning. If anything the conception is closer to immaculate by science in vampire logic, but Nadja/Lazlo promise Devil’s Threesomes when the hormones kick in to keep the Jeebus out of it.

Bonus if Guillermo’s been on a parent-relationship journey connecting with his father’s family/slayers, so he wasn’t around as much day-to-day and Nandor is openly advocating having Guillermo’s baby because Guillermo is an honorable man and would not leave Nandor alone with Child. [Who needs faith in promises when you can hold family hostage! Many of Nandor’s wives came about for this reason.]

Honestly, Nandor Baby-trapping Guillermo in the honeymoon phase—

(of their private, quiet beginning of their relationship- according to Guillermo, who doesn’t show anything to the cameras and is doing exploration post season 5 finale about his future. When they got together they discussed going slow to prevent Guillermo from being all wrapped up in Nandor to the detriment of himself and Nandor from repeating past relationship mistakes as a rushing people pleaser)

—is exactly what I expect from this fucked up dynamic. Bonus points if Nandor is putting his energy into Baby as Future because he really can’t face Guillermo growing old and dying in front of him, maybe if the child wants to be immortal then he’ll stay for them, if not Nandor.

Nadja believes Lazlo wants another kid and is involved to make sure no witch trickery is afoot. Collin Robinson is feeding and the Guide will not grasp the house had vetoed magic to make her the surrogate. Also, Silvia pretends she doesn’t hear the offer every time.

[the-vermin-king]

Yvenne's CC Interaction HCs

(Yvenne's Canon Character Interaction Headcanons)

This stuff is going to change in the fanfic post that should drop around September. That one is meant to set Yvenne's lore straight.

To start, I'd like to say that these HCs are in a timeline where Yvenne is the only other familiar in the house next to Guillermo.

Nadja of Antipaxos

¥ As her familiar, Yvenne is relatively nervous when actively serving Nadja. Seeing the way Nadja treats the familiars of others drives her to tread lightly when speaking to Nadja unprompted. Despite this, Nadja has yet to snap as harshly has she does with other familiars.

¥ After finding out that Yvenne fancies a vampire, Nadja and Yvenne both agree that being turned would happen should Yvenne court him successfully

¥ During her free time, Yvenne will sit with Dolly and talk about bugs while tending to the terrarium in her room. There, she keeps invasive species of bugs that show up in the house's garden.

From time to time, Nadja will invite Nadja to join her and the Guide when they go out (or stay in) to have a "girl's night".

Lazlo Cravensworth

¥ Like Guillermo, Lazlo calls Yvenne by a name similar to her own. Rather than "I(yi)-veen" he uses "Evie".

¥ Yvenne's neurodivergence makes her somewhat immune to hypnotism, intriguing Lazlo greatly. Should she not be busy serving Nadja, Lazlo will observe her to learn more about her brain. He has made multiple jokes about dissecting her should she die prematurely.

¥ Though charming, Yvenne feels uneasy around Lazlo when he talks about sexual encounters or expertise.

¥ After the frog experiment, Yvenne puts together a nice enclosure for the frogs to be kept and watched.

Nandor the Relentless

¥ Naturally her favorite of the four, Yvenne is quite fond of Nandor. Though she finds his silliness entertaining, she is deeply saddened by his treatment of Guillermo.

¥ Her and Nandor have a "Back in my day"/"It's time for your meds, grandpa" dynamic.

Colin Robinson

¥ Yvenne will frequently sneak small talks of entomology during conversations to try and get Colin to start info-dumping about the subject. She enjoys hearing him talk about things she has yet to learn. Anything else will put her to sleep.

Guillermo de la Cruz

¥ Being the other familiar, Yvenne feels a strong sense of camaraderie with Guillermo, and will likely take his word before anyone else's.

¥ After Guillermo is turned into a vampire, Yvenne finds out by catching him snacking on raw meat. Though sight made her sick, Yvenne agreed to keep her lips sealed as if nothing happened.

¥ The talking frogs intensely disturb but intrigue Yvenne. The thought of them talking would make her faint.

¥ Post-vampirism Guillermo teaches Yvenne about vampiric combat so she can fill the role should he lose his life to Nandor.

If you made it this far then I applaud you! You much be really interested in Yvenne. As I go about my time in this fandom, I intend on adding to this post as more come to mind.

[bullywugprincess]

WWDITS headcanons

The Guide uses they/she/it pronouns, Laszlo is genderfluid and uses all pronouns, Colin Robinson uses he/it pronouns.

Nandor uses he/him and Nadja uses she/her, but that is not to say they are cis. No vampire is truly cis because of now societal norms change over time, fitting the associations and ideology around a gender during their human lives does not mean they do in the modern day and with the amount of gender norm changes they've seen it's easy to feel disconnected from gender as a whole. Also gender is mostly based on human society, and of course vampire society is very different.

For similar reasons all vampires are neurodivergent. Societal norms have changed so much over time that it is hard for them to seem 'normal', super vampire senses give them sensory overload, and they all follow strange certain rules and routines (of course ones that they have to do as a vampire e.g. not going in sun or not entering rooms unless they're invited, but also completely independent personal rules like Nandor only reading letters in the sitting room, in order to keep their sanity in an everlasting life in our ever changing world)

Nadja and Laszlo have ADHD obviously, Nandor has autism and ADHD, and the Guide has autism and OCD (but her OCD is basically canon so), Colin is autistic

I know this is canon but I just want to say it. Nadja, Nandor, Lazlo, and the Guide are pansexual. I personally see Colin as a sex-enthusiast aro-ace, and obviously Guillermo is gay

A lot of the main group are actually just a big polyamorous relationship. Laszlo, The Guide and Nadja are getting it on, The Guide and Nadja are getting it on, Laszlo and Nadja, Guide and Marwa, Guide and Marwa and Nadja, Guide and Marwa and the Djinn, Guillermo and the Djinn, Guillermo and Nandor, Nandor and Laszlo, Laszlo and Nadja with Sean and Charmaine. I could literally go on all night

Nadja and Guillermo kicked ass together in London. I wish they had given us a full season of that year because I want to know more. They did face masks and cried about being separated from their boyfriend and bitched about their boyfriends and got absolutely shitfaced together. Guillermo had to save Nadja from getting into several fights whilst she was drunk, both with humans and vampires alike. They were just besties

NADJA CAME HOME FOR A REASON AND YOU CAN'T CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE! Also whatever the reason was I think Guillermo doesn't know, she found a way to hypnotize him and make him forget, hence why she goes back to being bitchy to him in season 4. I don't know what I think the reason is yet but I'm taking suggestions.

The Guide and Van Helsing wiped out the majority of the vampiric council when they got arrested over the affair. They weren't going down without a fight and they fucked shit up. The Guide was the OG "you killed all the other most powerful vampires so we're putting you in charge because A) that's fucking impressive and B) you're literally the only option right now. The only reason she wasn't put in charge in charge was because she was fighting with a vampire killer to protect said vampire killer and vampire killers are a big no no. Also said vampire killer died and she was captured in a very violent manner and the trauma is what made her forget, not simply the shame

Nadja originally either did or intended to join Lilith's coven, she definitely practiced witchcraft even before she was turned

Nadja didn't learn to read or write until a fair bit into her vampire life, perhaps after she met Lazlo, and still struggles with it

Nadja and Lilith were in love

Marwa, the Djinn and Guillermo have a "I hate Nandor" support group, occasionally the Guide will show up too

The Wraiths are all actually physical manifestations of the Guides mind. No I will not elaborate

[creativemessbyvd]

FIC IDEA VAULT #13: NANDERMO SOULMATES/REINCARNATED/ROLE SWAP AU (I GUESS?)

GASP, could it be??? Not an SW fanfic idea? xD

Seriously, I am just as shocked. Anyway, I got this little plot bunny while rewatching or rather, listening to WWDITS today as I made food. Enjoy!

TLDR; Vampire Hunters kill Nandor, Lazlo and Nadja, leading Guillermo to abandon his plan to have Derek turn him in favor of going after them. Six months later, Colin finds that it is possible to bring forth memories of a vampire and locate their reincarnated soul if it exists in the present time, teaming up with old allies and friends to locate the trio. Colin discovers that his past live is more intertwined to Lazlo's than he knew (apart from the whole thing with him being a baby and child raised by Lazlo). Guillermo returns to his mom's as Colin is explaining everything and gets knocked out bc Surprised! His family is responsible for his friends' second death. He is also linked to Nandor via a past life, and then our three vampires newly reunited with their memories must decide what to do, keep on living as humans or return to vampirism? What about the Hunters' plan to eradicate vampires once and for all? Will they be able to stop them given newly unearthed history amongst the group? Will Guillermo finally get his wish? And now that he has humanity, will Nandor want to give it up?Will Lazlo and Colin finally air out their history, both recent and past? Will Nadja be persuaded by Gregor into staying with him (as Lazlo deals with his own problems) and her fulfilling life or go back to having nothing to fill her heart after she had to close down the club?

More info, extra detailed idea below:

Season 4 ending deviation, as Guillermo goes to have Derek turn him into a vampire, Vampire hunters get into the house and kill Nandor, Nadja and Lazlo. A freaked out Colin Robinson calls him as he hears the fighting but Guillermo is too late. Despite the Djinn, Colin, The Guide, Derek, and many others trying to help out Guillermo, he leaves to pursue the Vampire Hunters responsible.

A few months after, as Colin is looking around the Council's library, he uncovers a book on ghosts and finds some very interesting information. Apparently, souls will come back and just continually be reborn, as is the case of Nadja's lover Gregor whom she would meet every few centuries. He, Doll Nadja and the Guide go to the Baron and the Sire to ask after what the book has told them and found that:

- The theory of 'killing a vampire will kill off any vampires they turned' is not true (it was created to avoid newly turned vampires to attack and killed their sires)

- it is true that souls will reincarnate even when someone is turned into a vampire (hence why ghosts are capable of being summoned) and there might even be more than one at a time, each with a little bit of a past life (the theory that you had at least 7 doubles in the world comes from this)

- Energy vampires were a product of a failed attempt of Hunters to harm vampires by making their own vampires

- It is possible to locate and bring forth memories if someone has a ghost and a descendant of the vampire

Seeing a chance to find their friends and bring their memories, Colin, the Guide and Doll Nadja locate Jenna and enlist her help alongside the witches to help find Nadja. They find her but another Gregor will not let them take her or have her memories returned.

They decide to wait and look for Lazlo next. According to the Baron, they need two things:

- a direct connection to the specific past life they wish to locate that will resonate the most with the present state (basically, not always will everyone live out the same life or be the same from one to the next, but their essence will always ring true the closer they are in the present to this specific past live) which is why a ghost, being a manifestation of their life before vampirism works best, but really anything that can draw forth a connection to the soul can work, like a relative or lover

- a present connection to them made of flesh, most of the time a vampired they turned will work

For Lazlo, they have the baby he turned into a vampire, but are stumped for the first 'soul connection' until Colin recalls a long kept journal of his he never reads anymore that gives him the answers he seeks, which is that he used to be human Lazlo's younger brother who was turned into an energy vampire by the same organization that killed them

As Colin tries to remain calm with all the revelations, they find Lazlo as a teacher and are interrupted by Guillermo finally answering the million texts Colin send. Guillermo is on the phone with Colin when he is attacked and he blacks out.

Guillermo had been for 6 months running around finding the trail of the Hunters and is just missing the leader and the truth of how the vampire home was located, when he gets home to his mom and is knocked out by his own family, the ones responsible for everything. They had to 'save him from himself' and explain their organization and what their plans are to eradicate Vampirism once and for all. Guillermo is told that he had been too obsessed by vampires for the family to feel like he deserved to be in on the secret. As he tries to persuade them that he has changed, they reveal they know he hasn't bc of his actions of hunting down the hunters (even if he did make it seem like they were killed by vampires) and his past life as Van Helsing himself, who fell in love with a vampire too (three guesses who). They also reveal they have plans to kill all vampires once and for all but Guillermo can't find out the whole plan as he is rescued.

As Colin, Doll Nadja, the Guide and Jenna race to find Guillermo, the Djinn is tasked with locating Nandor. Having Gail for the second requirement is easy but they are stumped for the first. They have no ghost nor any family, that is until the Djinn remembers Marwa and brings her and Freddie back to Manhattan to help out. To make the spell work, the Djinn must reverse the wishes until Marwa is back enough that her connection to Nandor will work. She is happy to be back to being her and they locate Nandor, who is in university and is apparently the younger of the three found.

With Guillermo back, they try and succeed in bringing back the memories, but the ex-vampires now face the question of if they even want to come back to their old lives amongst questions about not only themselves but their own interrelationships, and trying to race to find out how to stop the Hunters.

And that's all I had, thanks for reading my little idea dump :3

[boyhaunt]

this episode has EVERYTHING. nadja and the guide having a domestic. nandor wanting to hang with 'the boys' instead of the woman he handpicked and has been attempting to mold into his ideal soulmate. lazlo cravat gender envy. nandor being unreasonably proud of guillermo's skill as a vampire killer. 'that's my fucking guy!' and 'my closest companion for 13 years.' s3 finale flashbacks. 'should we put on a bit of a show for them, at least?' unbelievably homoerotic swordfight. cameo appearance from cameraman greg my beloved. 'i killed my friend! i killed my friend! i... may have killed my friend.' certified hot girl guillermo with his sleeves rolled up and a stake to nandor's throat (again). nandor not only resigning himself to an end at guillermo's hands but asking him to finish it. absolutely deranged choices all around

[sakebytheriver]

Nadja and Guillermo take Marwa out for a girl's night on the town where they all get super drunk and then have a wild crazy adventure when the Guide shows up with some wild task that needs to be done for the night club and gets passive aggressive about not being invited like "funny how this is girl's night and I was not given a call but Guillermo is here and he is all man" *runs her hand down Guillermo's arm while Guillermo sends a panicked look to the camera* and then the group is off, running around town getting into more and more trouble fucking up so many different places in a drunk haze, Marwa using her smarts to talk them out of a sticky situation and she drunkenly adorably hiccups in the middle of a super long scientific sounding word, Nadja and Guillermo absolutely gassing her up after her badass display of scientific knowledge that saved their lives and then Marwa feeling comfortable enough confessing to them that sometimes she thinks Nandor doesn't like her and he doesn't treat her right and Nadja and Guillermo totally drunk, now completely devoted to her for saving their lives tell her "girlfriend you are a Queen and he should worship you! if he doesn't treat you right, you make him" and then they all go home with the Guide still hanging around like a sober chaperone as they all go back to the house and Marwa totally dresses Nandor down saying she deserves better and he better start treating her the way she should be treated once again hiccuping adorably as Nadja and Guillermo drunkenly hype her up from behind her and then the Guide tries to be like "yeah and I deserve to be invited to things" but Nadja and possibly Lazlo, who walked in with baby Collin Robbinson in the middle of Marwa's speech, tell her to shut up because this is Marwa's moment and this isn't about you, end of episode it's revealed with a Nandor monologue that it is now routine for Marwa, Guillermo, and Nadja (+ the Nadja doll) to get together in a room in the house to paint each other's nails and gossip and other slumber party activities, last shot is Marwa closing the door on Nandor with a self satisfied smile on her face as Nandor turns to the camera with his signature cringe, roll credits

[falcor-thee-luck-dragon]

Dark Shenanigans - Nandor x (f)reader

Summary: It’s Nadja’s something hundredth birthday, with that said, you’re on a mission to make it great.

Warning: fluff, general vampire nonsense

Masterlist

“Yeah being a half vampire half human does have its perks. I mean for one I can do all that cool vampire shit and I can go out in the sunlight...so that helps for when they’re all being really annoying.” You admit with a casual shrug to one of the documentary cameras before turning to an isle of party supplies. “So anyways we’re at this store.”

The camera shifts to the multiple arras of supplies and materials at the local supermarket in Staten Island that you and your vampire lover’s human familiar, Guillermo, currently are. Specifically on the hunt for birthday decorations for Nadja and ghost Nadja who’s possessed a strange looking doll for the time being.

Since the other four actual full vampires can’t shop for themselves at this time of day or really in general, you and Guillermo have been given such an honorable task in making Nadja’s birthday the best one yet. Considering she’s the most well balanced in the head out of the four of them and is the only other lady of the manor.

“Hey Y/N, how’s this look?” Wonders Guillermo as he holds up a bunch of Mardi Gras beads of yellows, purples, and greens. “Comments, questions, concerns?” He adds with a small smile.

Eyeing up the beads, your head shifts over to the other various colors, “Hrmm, G I’m feeling the vibe you’re going for this year and I like it, but let’s go with Nadja colors.”

Guillermo’s dark eyes light up at your positive suggestion, “Right! So the red and black ones then?”

“Yup. She’ll love that shit.” You state with a satisfied nod of approval, “Let’s get some black and gold confetti from over there and oh, those masquerade masks look cool as fuck.”

You pick up and test out various masks in the background as Guillermo adds some bits of dialogue for the documentary crew, “Um yeah she’s really cool isn’t she.” He says with a smile while glancing at you then back to the camera, “Which is kind of odd since Y/N’s been with Nandor since 1793 so you’d think she’d be a little more like them but no, she’s super chill and really nice.” Suddenly his face goes a bit serious as he leans in to whisper, “But she did kill a whole street gang once when they threw a slur at me so I wouldn’t mess with her. For your safety.”

The camera pans back over to an oblivious you who’s put on a masquerade mask and is swinging a plastic light saber around with a whole lot more accuracy and grace then would a normal person. The camera then pans back to Gullimero, “Um, I’m just gonna....make sure she doesn’t smack anyone.”

——

Arms full of groceries of food for you and Gullimero, as well as random party decorations for Nadja’s birthday tomorrow night, you use the bottom of your boot to skillfully open the door as the documentary crew and Guillermo follows suit. Guillermo now on the verge of falling over with the large heart shaped pillow in his arms that’s covering most of his body.

You don’t feel tired in the slightest due to your half vampiric abilities so this is nothing to you, “Alright.” You state, turning on your heel to face the crew and Guillermo, “They’re asleep so we gotta be extra sneaky now, I don’t want Nadja catching us with all this cool spooky birthday shit. Everyone to the attic!” You whisper yell before leading the charge to the attic.

They all follow as quietly and as quickly as they can and then soon enough in no time are you and Guillermo back outside in the sunny garden trying to figure out if you should blow up the giant sea monster pool floaty.

“I mean it would look cool as hell and no doubt out-do whatever the fuck boring thing Lazlo probably has planned.” You quip with a shrug while the two of you stare thoughtfully at the small gloomy dark pond. “He’s got no chance with us. I’ve won best decorator and card maker for two hundred years in a row.”

Guillermo side eyes you in honest amazement, “Wow that’s a lot of years. And cards.”

“I know. I was an artist in the 12th century but my no good terrible good for nothing piece of garbage trash sexist human husband, who I was forced to marry when I was only sixteen, took all the credit for my artwork in that era.” You confirm with a growl, “But it stings less because once I finally grew into my powers and strength at eighteen I simply made his untimely demise look like an accident.” You add with a smirk.

“Oh, wow.” Mutters the intrigued familiar.

“Precisely. The old fool was thrown off his horse because I told Philip, the horse, to throw him off. And he did. Which killed the idiot so I got the house and all of his money.”

“That’s......neat.” Mutters Guillermo as he shoots the camera crew from behind you and him a nervous look. “Uh the suns going down so I should probably help Nandor out of his coffin.”

Raising your head to the sky you immediately see how the sun has begun to paint the clouds in beautiful colors of oranges, reds, light pinks, and darkening purples. “Oh, how bout that. Yeah alright let’s get inside.” You nod to Guillermo before turning to walk towards the manor’s giant mahogany doors.

——

Turning the handle and walking a couple feet into the large main room that holds itself as a sort of crossroads for all the other various connecting hallways and staircases. You don’t make it even three more steps towards the left ascending staircase before you hear the highly recognizable voice of your one and only.

“Y/N! My lovely wife and favorite person still ever so lovely!” Announces Nandor loudly with a grand smile showing off his pearly white fangs, “How I have missed you and your morning kisses. Where have you been off to?” He wonders softly as you smile a big dumb love-struck grin right back up at him, you’d absolutely die to hear that accent one last time.

“I can’t tell you right now it’s a secret!” You whisper yell back, causing his thick dark brows to scrunch up in confusion.

“But I am your lovely strong puff dragon Y/N.” Whines Nandor adorably as you roll your eyes at the cameras before looking back up at him.

“Fine. Come here then.”

In an instant he’s at your side, excitedly awaiting what secretive news you will tell him, “Okay, so we know it’s Nadja’s birthday tomorrow right?”

“Yes. I remember because she hasn’t shut up about it.”

“Right. So me and Gullimero got some fun surprise birthday party decorations and they’re in the attic and we can’t tell Nadja.”

Nandor gives you a knowing look of affirmation as he leans in closer to you, his demeanor suddenly shifting into a more saddened one, “You went shopping without me?” He says quietly.

Leaning up to give him a quick peck on the cheek your hands instantly find his, “Just for a little while, but I still need to find more stuff so....you wanna come?”

Nandor’s big dark eyes light up with joy as you hand him a kind smile, “Yes! Let us go in search of unknown treasures for our lady friend Nadja so she will not be mad at us for terrible dull gifts of friendship.”

Laughing you give his hands a playful squeeze, “Come on I’ll race you to Party City!” You say before leading him past the camera crew and Guillermo who simply watches the two of you leave, glad to have an hour of peace.

“There’s a whole city for partying? Y/N why have we never been to this place?”

——

“Y/N there are no people partying here.” Whines your vampire lover in puzzlement as he follows you from the entrance to a side isle. “You said this was a city for partying.”

“That’s just the name of the store Nans.” You retort with a small chuckle as he looks from right to left at all the color coded party plates and napkins galore.

“Well the title is very misleading.”

“Agreed.”

Turning to the right you guide him towards the decretory pirate themed isle in search of something that will peak his interest. Also you wanted so badly to make it to this spot but Gullimero was a man on a mission so your intention was thwarted for when you had Nandor with you.

Speed walking down the pirate themed isle you quickly halt all movement as Nandor’s large body stops within less than an inch from your back. Smiling brightly you snatch the desired object in front of you and as swift as a cat turn to face him.

“Have you come for a dual my old enemy?” You speak slyly, eyes narrowed as you hold the foam sword right in front of his face. “I sense a nervousness about you. Tell me, are you ready to face your inevitable bloody end?”

Staring at the pointy foam, his dark puppy eyes shift over to you as an adorable fangy grin breaks out across his pale face, “Seems you have come prepared, oh radiant and alluring seductress. Well, so have I!” Shouts Nandor before grabbing two foam swords from off the rack and swinging them in both hands like a mad man.

Taking a cautious step back you hold your pathetic five dollar sword in both hands like a true warrior ready for battle, “Only one shall leave this place alive.” You affirm with a smirk, “And it’s not going to be you.”

“Arrrrrggg.” Bellows your lover as he charges you like the true conqueror that he once was. But all to soon do you swiftly duck under his arms and swat him over his stomach with a confident thwack sound.

He makes a puny little “oww” as you turn around to face him once again, “Y/N you hit me kind of hard.” He complains, looking rather defeated and genuinely hurt that you could have intentionally injured him on purpose.

Bringing the plastic weapon down to your side once again, your face suddenly softens as you walk over to him, “Come here you big baby.” You quip sincerely as he leans down so you can give his cheek a quick kiss.

Rising back to his full height, Nandor almost blushes as the corners of his eyes crinkle into a happy smile, “Actually it didn’t hurt at all I just wanted you to kiss me.” Reveals the vampire with a proud grin as you simply roll your eyes.

“Should have known.” You add before turning and snatching up four more plastic foam pirate swords for the others. “Alright let’s get outta here, follow me my love, to the checkout line we shall purchase our weapons of war and partying on the high seas.” You announce with gusto as Nandor stands proudly at your side, ready to follow you anywhere.

“Yes. To check out.”

——

Kicking open the unlocked door, Nandor bursts into the vampire residence with bags full of goodies for Nadja’s birthday party. You right behind him but less dramatically, “We’re back!” You shout to no one in particular as Colin Robinson suddenly appears from out of nowhere, looking ready to leave with his funny little hat and usual beige jacket.

“Oh hey guys,” He starts with a friendly nod, “I’m just heading out on the town tonight. I guess there’s a fair or something in the park and I wanted to test my skill at the ball toss. I’ve been reading up on the body mechanics and how the game is set up which seems pretty basic all in all. Also I really want to win a stuffed bear this time, it might add a little pizazz to my room. Welp see ya’round.” Adds Colin before walking past the two of you without another word and out into the night he goes with some of the camera crew following close behind.

Nandor turns to you with a look of annoyance, “Jeesh I thought he would never leave. Let’s go to your room I want to kiss you some more now.”

“Why my room?”

“Because since you are half vampire you get to sleep in a bed and because I am a full vampire I sleep in a coffin.” Inquires Nandor while looking at you with those big beautiful dark eyes of his, “And my coffin is too small for cuddles so your room will suffice.”

“Yeah that’s a fair point.” You shrug before following him to your room.

After many cuddles leading to other more rated R type activities that lasted until just about sunrise, you finally got some well needed rest while the sun shone high in the sky until she began her dramatic descend back into oblivion. Opening your eyes you slowly rise from out of your comfy bed, already missing the presence of your obsidian eyed lover.

He gets too nervous about your closed windows for fear that the sun might burn him which would be impossible because you black out the glass. But alas, he’s very cautious about these types of things and won’t risk it for anything, though he feels bad about leaving you in the morning, you understand.

Suddenly it dawns on you that today or perhaps tonight, is Nadja’s birthday and you completely forgot to set up any decorations. Shit, how stupid. Throwing the blankets off of you, your feet move quick as you speedily change yesterday’s outfit for something a bit nicer and more clean.

Racing out of your room and into the dimly lit manor hallway, you make a bee line for the attic but before you’re able to reach the steps, Guillermo runs into you, just about knocking you into a wall of various stolen ancient weapons. Sharp ones at that.

That was close.

“Y/N are you okay!” Worries the familiar as you quickly gather your bearings.

“Guillermo! The decorations! Nadja’s birthday!” You whisper yell as the human man simply smiles. “Why are you smiling, this situation does not call for smiles.”

“Don’t worry. While you were sleeping I set up all the decorations.” He replies with a shrug, “No problem.”

“What? But that must have taken you all day, you could have asked me for help. I would have come.” Your brows furrow as he shakes his head, though you still feel bad for not helping with anything.

“Well I did try, but um,” Gullimero awkwardly clears his throat, giving the camera a quick glance, “Nandor was with you and last time I asked for you while you and him where having alone time he threatened to carve out my eyeballs and force feed them to me.”

Pinching the bridge of your nose in annoyance you take a deep breath, “Sounds like him. Very creative when he wants to be, alright, well....where’s everyone?”

“Oh, they’re not up yet. I was actually on my way to get you. I made blood popsicles and the pool floaty is all done and in the pond.” He says with a sense of pride for his decorating skills. “I think she’ll like what we’ve come up with this year.”

-

Standing in the living room with your three fellow immortals you search a dresser for her card, “Oh shit where’s my card? I could have sworn I had it yesterday on my dresser but I don’t remember seeing it there in the morning. Maybe it’s in this one?”

“Witches!” Hisses Nadja as you huff in frustration, where the hell did you put that damn card?

“Oh, Y/N my love,” Intervenes Nandor with a gentle tug of your sleeve, “I took it with me when I left your room before sunrise because I wanted to put my name on it too so she would know it’s from us.”

“What?” Replies Lazlo dramatically, “Now hold on just a damn minute, this card competition is individually scored so I won’t be having any of this nonsense. I worked really hard on mine this year.”

“Oh lick a donkey’s arse, look here,” You retort with, quickly holding up the card for Nadja, “there are two separate drawings on ours so either way if one of us wins she gets both our pictures. So you better hope your drawing doesn’t resemble a night clubs bathroom wall.”

“Yeah.” Mutters Nandor, who’s hiding behind you while resting both hands on either one of your shoulders as you glare at Lazlo.

“Fine.” Agrees Lazlo begrudgingly, “And mine will be amazing, this bitch of paper took me a whole six months to plan and produce. Can’t get quality this good anywhere else I guarantee it.” Adds Lazlo with a firm nod of self approval as you glance at the nearby camera.

“Right, okay everyone sit it’s time for presents. I want to know what you all got me.” Beams Nadja excitedly as she smiles a fangy grin in delight, plopping herself down in one of the arm chairs. Lazlo quickly finding the other one while you and Nandor seat yourself on the large couch. Colin and Guillermo finding somewhere to sit close by respectfully.

“Well, all I can say is hold onto your socks my dear cause this is going to blow you away.” Smirks Lazlo as he pulls a small box from out of his jacket pocket.

“If it’s a self made business card that says invitation to sexy town I will puke.” You deadpan while Nandor laughs from beside you, causing Lazlo to lose his smirk as Nadja hides her amusement the best she can manage.

“He he, sexy town, nice one Y/N.” Mutters Nandor with a proud grin as you raise a brow at Lazlo who’s giving you a hard glare.

“Oh, my dear pumpkin pie love, don’t listen to Y/N I will love anything you gift me.” Encourages Nadja with a bright welcoming smile, no doubt immediately boosting Lazlo’s once irked mood.

Rolling your eyes you shift a bit to find yourself leaning into Nandor’s body as Nadja opens up the rest of the vampire residents various gifts. A joyous fangy smile gracing her pale features every single time, revealing this birthday party was a thrilling success.

After much more fun that just about lasts throughout the whole night, and some rare but hilarious attempts at dancing between the five of you vampiric individuals. You’re feeling rather sleepy and you can tell Nandor is ready for a trip to dreamland as well.

Swaying to the lowly playing record instrumental, you hold Nandor tight while simultaneously enjoying the feeling of him so close, him doing just the same as he keeps you firmly pressed against his chest. His long dark hair tickles your face as he presses his head to your cheek, doing his absolute best to keep the flow without tripping up.

Sensing his growing fatigue, you gently squeeze his hand, “My love the sun will be up soon, let’s get you to bed, yes?”

A small lazy smile tugs at the corners of his lips while he looks down to meet your gaze, “But my dark angel I’m not tired. I want to dance with you a little longer.” He whines adorably before failing to conceal a big yawn.

Giggling, you lean back to slowly lead him towards the door, “That yawn says otherwise.”

“That wasn’t a yawn Y/N, I was just smiling really big.” He protests, though he still follows your lead to the door.

“I’ve never seen anyone smile like that.” You add with a raised brow.

“Well maybe that’s just how I smile.”

Letting out a breathy snort, you pull away from him to at last take his one hand, “Come. I can’t have a single ray of that dreaded sun to get a taste of your precious skin. Not on my watch.”

Glancing at the closed front door, Nandor squeezes your hand, “Well um, now since you’ve mentioned the sun...I think I’d like to go to my crypt now.” He says, the flash of worry crossing over his face for only a brief moment.

“You sure? I mean a sunrise is pretty beautiful if I’m being honest and I know you never get to see them...”

“Not funny Y/N. And not fair, you know I can’t because I am full vampire.”

“And you’re missing out.”

“And I’d like to stay alive Y/N.”

“Aren’t you dead?”

“Yes and I am your only husband so I need to stay not burnt to a crisp.”

Chuckling, you follow him down the hallway, “Oh really? Don’t want me finding myself with another vampiric lover? Some new beast to sweep me off my feet and take me away into the night.” You tease.

Side eyeing you, he frowns, “No. Don’t I sweep you off your feet?”

Stepping into his crypt you stop him with your hand against his bicep, “Always.” You whisper sincerely with a quick wink, causing him to break out into a big fangy grin.

“Good. And if anyone would try and whoo you I would make sure there would be no more whooing again!” Exclaims Nandor, making the candles rise in flame for only a short second at his rise in emotion for how much he loves you.

“I don’t doubt they would fall by your blade. Not for a second.”

[strawberry-circus]

I haven’t seen the last episode yet as I believe it releases later tonight, but before anything happens I have secretly been a Derek x Guillermo truther ever since season 3 and my season finale predictions are:

Nadja will burn down the nightclub

Nandor will kill a central character only to use his final wishes on penis enlargement only to immediately backtrack this wish, unintentionally backtracking all of his wishes and somehow that also alerts the vampire council or some shit because why the fuck not??

the family of 4 that Nandor backpacked around Europe with will return claiming to be Marwa’s descendants or some fucking thing only to not be remotely relevant in the plot whatsoever

Simon the Devious and Lazlo kiss then Lazlo snaps his neck, ending the rivalry. Except he was wearing the hat and as he walks away the camera zooms in on Simon’s face as he opens one eye, teasing his inevitable return in season 5

Guillermo gets shoved into another box.

Killing Sal Vulcano alerts the rest of the Impractical Jokers and they have actually been spending this entire season setting up a deadly prank, and Nandor is Tonights Biggest Loser. Guillermo will have to save him but he takes a really long time doing so.

The Guide was a spy against the crew and Nadja finds out, but is forced to concede because The Guide threatens to burn Mamma Mia 2: Here We Go Again

Colin robs a 7/11 trying to get attention, everyone else goes to jail. That’s right. This is a bottle episode. Colin can rescue them if he wanted to, but he doesn’t. In fact, he finds himself strangely pulled to their arguing and awkward tension. Hm.

[nellie-elizabeth]

What We Do in the Shadows: Lazlo's Father (6x06)

A pretty good episode, but probably not one of my favorites?

Cons:

The recurring gag of Nandor having a crush on the Guide still just feels really unmotivated for me. I swear this isn't a shipping thing, the whole Nandermo thing is something I enjoy thinking about but I don't have a lot of hope that the show will actually deliver on. But even setting that aside, it just feels out of nowhere and not very funny for Nandor to have this crush on the Guide, a character who hasn't been around most of the season and when she does pop up, has nothing really to do? I don't know.

Pros:

I enjoy the groupings this season, where Nandor, Nadja, and Guillermo are often connected in one of the plots together. It's a fun dynamic. Their subplot, with their misunderstanding about an AirBNB, and then the plot twist that shapeshifters actually are involved, was pretty great. Guillermo as exasperated explainer of basic human things is a joke that never gets old. And I love them accidentally stumbling into preferential treatment, as their neighbor is worried she'll get in trouble for operating an unlicensed AirBNB.

Probably the funniest bits of this to me were the fact that the vampires hadn't even realized they had neighbors on the other side of their house, and also the bit where Nandor and Nadja are each paranoid that the other might be a shapeshifter in disguise. They are unable to assuage each other's suspicions because it turns out that Nadja never listens to Nandor when he talks and so can't answer his basic questions that would prove she's really who she says she is.

The main plot is a Lazlo-centric operation, where his ghostly father comes back to try and make things right with his son. While Lazlo is completely unwilling to entertain that he's a changed man, the rest of the gang seem charmed and delighted by the old ghost. I loved Nadja willfully misunderstanding his insulting attitude towards her and actually getting along with him, Colin taking out his own daddy issues on the relationship even as Lazlo reminds Colin that he was the one who raised him up from a baby... Lazlo having Guillermo pretend to be his servant in order to impress his father... all of this was great. And then in the end we discover that Lazlo was right to be suspicious of his father all along. Turns out, he's here to try and gain access to a corporeal form again. And it's not Cravensworth's Monster he's gunning for - it's Lazlo himself! Luckily he's able to use his Ghostbusters-esque contraption to trap his father's essence, which he then hands over to Colin. Colin hides it along with his Funko Pop collection, which is of course something he would have!

So that's it. I had fun with this episode, I liked seeing Lazlo deal with his emotional baggage in a direct way, all the Freudian slips were quite humorous and completely in character for this dude! Still, I'm not sure anything in this episode is going to stick in my head in a major way moving forward. Fun, but not remarkable!

8/10

[scottydelacruz]

So thanks to moving into uni and classes I wasn't able to watch the last 3 episodes of WWDITS. Heartbreaking. But I like looking back at my live reactions so I am gonna watch em all now and master post em. What's the worst that can happen.

Episode 5: The Chamber of Judgement

Guillermo and The Guide both waiting in the shadows (heh) for them is such a good moment.

I love that Lazlo and Colin just being completely uninterested in the Council and just fuckin around with Shaun is so sweet. Just gonna let the world know that there is a fanfic shipping Lazlo and Shaun and I support it it's funny.

Kingmaker Guillermo enters the chat.

The Guy Pillow guy looks a little like Paul Hollywood and now I'm dying.

Shaun is in an MLM. I'm scared for him. Poor boy.

Guillermo wants the throne. I approve of this plan. He deserves it.

Guillermo and Nandor are boyfriends only RN it's in spirit.

Colin 'the guy who looks like a foetus' Robinson.

LAZLO IS GOIN TO COURT. YES!

Guillermo wants something. Power hungry Guillermo is weird I don't subscribe. It makes me uncomfy.

I wanna do the sick white robe running and dancing.

Why did they keep on walking put of the caravan.

Derek has Doc Martens and a hellhound. Beautiful.

LAZLO! IN COURT! WITH BOXES OF PORNOGRAPHY! I LOVE IT!

Awww I feel bad for poor Lazlo, failing like that.

Lazlo standing just completely gone is how I feel after a heavy conversation.

Episode 6: The Escape

Oh they fucked up. They fucked up bad.

Honestly I respect The Sire. Sire hungy, Sire dig hole, Sire stop hungy.

Lazlo: No, it's a fucking urban myth, like ghosts and large penises. 👀 👀 👀

Is it Baron time? It's Baron time.

Girly-Jim. He did nail it.

Guillermo is done, disgusted, and in danger.

NADJA DOLL STAN.

Once again, not a fan of Guillermo power

I did not know The Watchers are ladies. I have only seen screencaps. I love them.

The Baron riding on the hellhound is way funnier in motion.

How *do* you know what vampire piss tastes like.

Yeah racism orgies sound fun.

I partially retract my statement Guillerrmo bitchslapping Nandor was awesome.

The Sire looks cool AF. The harmonica isn't going to work.

OH MY GODS LAZLO HARMONICA VOICE IS BEAUTIFUL AND PERFECT I LOVE IT!

Nandor pulling Guillermo too early is definitely no homo.

How has it taken Colin until the year of our lord 2021 to learn about that's what she said. Boy we be reppin that joke for decades.

Oh my I want a TV show of The Sire, The Baron, and the hellhound. They are an adorable combo. We stan and ship.

That Hussein press conference reference tho. Beautiful.

Episode 7: The Siren

(I have seen nothing about this episode yet so this is full blind).

Lazlo and Colin Robinson are the true buddy cop duo. They got that vibe.

SCOTT BALUKA. SCOTT BALUKA. SCOTT BALUKA. SCOTT BALUKA. SCOTT BALUKA. SCOTT BALUKA.

Israel/Palestine being described as a win/win is terrifying.

Poor Nadja doll, she can't get around. We need to get her a car or something too.

Guillermo calling out the camera crew is powerful but unfair they did it because you both have the same problem you stupid man.

Is it just me or has the art team declined a little. A couple of them have looked a bit off. They are mostly good still.

Poor Nadja doll. I feel bad for her. I will miss her, even if we barely see her.

Colin rubbing his chest is a oddly sensual view. I don't know how I feel.

OH NO. The Guide is being oddly seductive with Guillermo I don't want to read into it.

That siren has clicky legs. Very clicky. Like my bones.

Guillermo having a longing moment with LEGO is a big mood.

LMFAO? IN YOUR COMFORT TV SHOW? ITS MORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK.

That Nadja doll rat is scary.

He's gonna buy a tricopter. He is.

Lazlo should not be allowed in Best Buy.

Guillermo I'm sorry but good luck.

Colin stop singing I'm in pain.

Colin please don't do this she will eat you.

Nadja doll rat is powerful.

Nadja doll is back baby! I am so glad.

RIP camera crew. We appreciate your service.

They could totally travel to Plum Island again.

Honestly I respect Colin beating off.

And that is me done wow powerful time I will not get over the Scott Baluka for a while.

[nellie-elizabeth]

What We Do in the Shadows: A Night Out with the Guys (5x02)

The poor Guide lol.

Cons:

I will say, the Guide isn't really my favorite part of the show, as much as I love Kristen Schaal. So when the show seems to lampshade how superfluous she feels, making jokes about how the other vampires forgot about her, didn't notice she hadn't been around, I find myself sort of agreeing with that sentiment. She's great, but she doesn't seem to add much that we don't already have with the other characters, and I don't miss her when she's gone! Sorry!

Pros:

I did enjoy Nadja's plot thread even without caring much for the Guide, specifically her discovery of Little Antipaxos! It was so fun to see her connect back with her roots, while being completely and utterly oblivious to the poor way she's treating the people around her, specifically the Guide. Her enthusiasm about her original home is infectious and delightful.

Lazlo and Nandor hanging out with Sean and his buddies made for a lot of laughs. They're playing an extended game of chicken with each other, basically, both refusing to use hypnosis to get themselves out of trouble as the evening devolves into pure chaos. Sean and his buddies harass a cop, steal his car, crash his car, shoot his gun off into the air, get arrested... and all the while, Lazlo shows how charm can work just as well as hypnosis. But in the end, once they're all locked up behind bars, Lazlo admits that he's never been very good at hypnosis, and that's why he tried to mock Nandor about using it so often. Nandor uses his powers to get them out, and then he backs Lazlo up, claiming it was his charisma that saved the day after all.

What works so well about this show is that it's 95% jokes, but then every once in a while they toss in something to make it clear that these people actually care about each other and enjoy one another's company. The fact that Lazlo admitted a weakness to Nandor, and then Nandor helped him out and also let him take the credit, shows that there's a real affinity between them. It makes all the comedy land even harder, that there's a genuine backbone to it.

And then there's Guillermo, trying to figure out why his vampire change doesn't seem to have worked out. Clearly something's going on - he's able to give himself bat ears when he attempts to transform. The Baron doesn't know what's up with all that, though they do run an experiment to see what happens when a vampire gets double-bitten by two different vampires, in order to perhaps change Guillermo further. Their test subject ends up exploding into gory mist, so it sounds like getting Nandor to bite Guillermo isn't going to be the answer to these issues either.

I loved the beat at the end where Guillermo inadvertently spills the beans and tells Lazlo he's been bitten. Lazlo is furious and says that the news will probably kill Nandor. He suggests convincing Nandor to bite him, and when Guillermo says "I don't think that will work," Lazlo replies: "You don't? Well then you're fucked." That was a big laugh but also an example of what I was talking about above. Lazlo is legitimately pissed off, and Guillermo is legitimately scared. This is a funny show with a lot of jokes, but the stakes are underpinning the shenanigans super well!

That's all for now. I'm officially so excited for the other vampires (Nandor especially, of course) to find out about Guillermo's condition. It's sure to be a lot of fun and chaotic nonsense!

7/10

[nellie-elizabeth]

What We Do in the Shadows: Reunited/The Lamp (4x01/02)

Ahhhh!!! I discovered this show during quarantine and I am so excited to be back with new episodes.

Cons:

Nothing really to report, here! More just a general wish list of things I hope we can explore later. There's this part of me that wishes season four had broken with the formula a bit more, and played around with the diaspora... the fact that we start with Nandor, Nadja, and Guillermo all returning home, and don't really get to see them having their adventures, is maybe a little disappointing? But that's maybe more a pie in the sky wish of what I wanted, as opposed to a judgment on what we actually got.

Pros:

Where to begin? I always find writing about comedies to be particularly challenging, because a lot of what was great about this episode were individual funny lines and moments, and it's not exactly fun for me to just list jokes and say they made me laugh. Suffice it to say, a lot of these jokes made me laugh!

Guillermo is the best thing about this show to me, so I love that his role here is that he's moving on but not really. It's such a funny tension for his character, to have him no longer hung up on Nandor and desperate to become a vampire all the time. He's got a boyfriend, he's not jealous of Nandor's quest for a wife, he's chill. But... he's still hanging around! He's got to take care of baby Colin Robinson and stop the house from falling apart. These vampires would all be lost without him, and he's going to keep helping them, grudgingly, even though his heart doesn't seem to be really in it right now. I love this more jaded, self-assured version of Guillermo.

I love how much the internet wants Guillermo and Nandor to be together, and sure, I think it would be an interesting turn for the story to at least explore, but honestly it's just the sheer comedic potential of them that makes me smile every time. I think it's just that the bar is so, so low here. In this episode, we get Nandor rescuing Guillermo from drowning, saying his first and last name correctly, defending him and sticking up for him a bit with Lazlo and Nadja, and you're sitting here thinking "wow! this is such a step up!" but it's so funny because literally just knowing his first and last name is all that it takes to improve on the behavior of the other vampires. Literally Guillermo deserves so much better, and yet we are seeing Nandor put in some measure of effort. So delicious.

I've got to say, the creepy baby Colin Robinson was the one aspect of this season I wasn't sure was going to work for me, but it's so funny so far. Just the thought of Lazlo trying to raise him to be the opposite of boring old Colin Robinson, the way everyone refuses to call him Colin except Guillermo, and instead keep saying "he's the thing that emerged from the corpse of our dead friend Colin Robinson", all of his destructive and bizarre shenanigans... so fun to see Lazlo of all people take on something of a parent role, and then Guillermo swoop in to do all the actual work, as usual.

Nadja got a glow-up in terms of self-confidence, as she returned from the Vampiric Council regretting that she hadn't made more big moves, and decides to open a Vampire Night Club! The Guide is against turning the lair of the old council into such a place, but Lazlo steps in with some psychoanalysis to help get her past her objections. They discover that in her past, the Guide was a bad vampire who had sex with a vampire killer! The solution? Send Guillermo to seduce her. Brilliant therapy work there, Lazlo. This scenario is so bizarre and impossible to fully describe. It really highlights my personal struggles with reviewing joke-heavy TV comedies. I don't know what to tell you, it was really funny! Lazlo saying that Freud got the concept of "penis envy" from him, the two of them digging through nested boxes in the Guide's mindscape, all of it had me laughing!

Nandor's wives... honestly, I can't say enough about how great this show is at managing to take a scenario that sounds good to begin with, and then spin it out into avenues I never would have considered. First of all, Nandor calling the men he was once married to his "guy wives" is absolutely legendary behavior. Secondly, the genie being there to... mercy kill? All the people Nandor decides not to choose? So funny. He's so bored. "You don't look like a djin." "You can't say that." "I just did." Contender for one of the funniest jokes in these first two episodes.

I could go on, but as I said, it feels fruitless to just start listing jokes I enjoyed. It's funny! This show, it turns out, is really really good! I can't wait for more.

9/10