#and an older sibling who has nothing better to do and tries to hack their way into stuff to either

[charactersaremylife]

I think I spend perhaps a significant amount of time making stories in my brain, on more than one occasion my dreams have relayed themselves to me in a semi-coherent visual that I am fully not a part of. Also I did just have an upsettingly visceral zombie dream that I woke up feeling panicky about. The method of "zombies aren't real and none of that happened" was not nearly as soothing as asking myself how that scenario would resolve, and how would the story be told so that things would turn out alright.

[lovemesomesurveys]

Does it annoy when someone is really, really obnoxious? Oh, absolutely. I can’t stand when people are cocky, arrogant, and obnoxious.  Do you say 'start' or 'begin'? I think I’ve said “start” more often.  Whose the last person you laughed with? My brother.  Who can make you smile no matter what? My doggo usually can.  What color is your favorite fruit? Yellow.

Do you have any plans for today? Nothing out of the ordinary, just watch YouTube videos, scroll through Tumblr, do some surveys, maybe read, maybe color, sleep... that’s about it.   Have you ever dumped someone or been dumped on Valentine's day? No. Has anyone ever hacked onto your myspace/facebook etc account? No. Do you look like your sibling(s)? We have our similar features. Although, there’s this filter on Snapchat sometimes that makes you look like a man with a goatee and it seriously makes me look identical to my older brother lol. It’s just funny because I don’t feel it’s so apparent normally.  Do you prefer buses or cabs? Neither, really.  Does anyone call you 'babe' or 'baby'? ”Babe” sometimes.  Do you like your eye color? Meh, I wish I had blue or green eyes.  Is there someone you can't get enough? Alexander Skarsgard. ;) How was your week? There’s finally been talk of me just going home and skipping the rehabilitation center I was supposed to go to but haven’t been able to go for various reasons. I was supposed to go July 1st, but there was insurance issues. Then I was supposed to go August 1st to a different, but yet again a few other road bumps got in the way. I’m thinking I’m not meant to go? ha. It’ll be so close, like yeah you’re going, they’re ready for you, and then nope! I’m perfectly fine with that, though, let me go home damnit. They’ve been showing my mom how to do some stuff so she can do it at home, so I hope I’ll be going home soon. I do want to do the swallowing test first and see if I can start a liquid diet and be able to have actual drinks and then work up to actual food. 

Do you keep up with the celebrity gossip? Yeah, but not nearly as much as I used to.  Are you wearing any masacara? No. I’m not wearing any makeup.  Whose the most innocent person you know? I don’t know. Do you check Postsecret every week? I never go on the website, I just come across a Facebook post of theirs once in awhile. Is there anyone you regret knowing? No. Does your best friend smoke? No. Have you ever flown a kite? I think I have once when I was a kid.  Do you throw pennies away? No.  Has anyone ever told you a lame line like, 'It's not you, it's me'? Yes, which I thought was BS at the time, but then I’ve said that before and I  believe it truly was me, so... Do you think you're a fragile person? I’ve become one over the past 6 years, physically and figuratively. I feel so weak in every way.  Are you truly happy right now? No. Do you like all your aunts and uncles? All but one.  Whose the last person you said hi to? My dad just now.  Would you rather stay friends with exes or not? I mean it depends. I’ve tried and it ultimately didn’t work out for me, but that’s not to say it never could. It works for some people. Are your parents proud of you? They say they are. I don’t know why, I feel like such a disappointment and failure.  Are you proud of who you are? No. How many sinks are in your house? Three. Have you ever worked somewhere with horrible conditions? I’ve never had a job.  Do you know all your best friend's secret? No. What's your opinion on ...on what? Have you ever been scared to be home alone? Yeah. Even still, like I’m fine for awhile during the day but I don’t stay home alone at night or overnight.  Is your sibling(s0 a good liar? I don’t feel like they’re habitual liars, they’re pretty good, honest people.  Are YOU a good liar? No. I used to be able to hide my emotions better, but definitely not anymore. I do downplay things and maybe leave some things out, though.  What's the best game show? I like to watch Family Feud and The Weakest Link.  Do you say 'simple' or 'plain'? Uhh, depends what I’m talking about.  Name a time when you couldn't control your anger: It was during a very stressful and long trip from Idaho to California (we went to Idaho because my grandpa lived there and he was sick and dying) and our emotions were high because of my grandpa’s passing. I think there was hanger mixed in there for some of us, too. My dad and I were bickering and I just got so mad because given everything going on it was just too much. I remember actually shaking because I was so mad.  How often do you wash your hands? Often, and I use hand sanitizer often as well.  What's your dream car? I don’t have one. Are you one of those people who want to marry Edward Cullen? No. I was team Edward back in the Twilight days, though, and thought he was cute.  What's something you need to survive, other then the obvious food, etc? My family.  Have you ever been kicked in the stomach? No. What would you do if the president asked you to hang out? Nah, that’s okay. Would you rather never wear hoodies again or never wear T-shirts again? Aw, I really like hoodies and graphic tees, but out of the two I’d go with never wear hoodies. I have so many graphic tees and I’d like to keep getting more. Even though I shouldn’t cause I don’t have room... Do you know how to stop an over-flowing toilet? Yeah. When you're typing, do you type 'tomorrow' or 'tmr'? I type, “tomorrow.” With the exception of like, “lol”, “lmao”. “omg”, and “wtf”, I don’t like shorthand or text speak.  Whose the most kind person you know? My mom.  Did you see the movie 'House of wax'? Did you like it? Yeah. Do you have any special jewlery? I do. Do you/did you like school? Overall, I would say I did. In the midst of it I wouldn’t have said that, though. I got so stressed out, burnt out, and overwhelmed, but I did like some aspects of it. Plus, at least I was being productive then. Since graduating UC back in 2015 I haven’t done shit.  Have you ever dated the same person more then three times? Joseph and I had a complicated, off and on thing for like 3 years.  Do you need to wash your hair? I do. Lol or lmao? I use both.  Can you tell when your best friend is lying? I think so. Do you like writing speeches? No. I hated giving them even more.  Do you have bangs? No. Do you say 'lol' even when it's not that funny? I’ll write it with a deadpan look and all lol. Like now.  What's your favorite perfume? Hmm. I don’t have one particular one.  Have you ever been dumped through text? No, but via Facebook Messenger.  Who doesn't deserve to be so famous? I don’t know. Does your hair get greasy soon after washing it? No. If the last person you kissed asked you to marry them, what would you do? Uh, say no and be like wtf?? That would definitely be completely out of the blue. We haven’t seen or talked to each other in 6 years and he had ended things with me years prior because he didn’t feel the same way about me and didn’t want to commit. Now he just shows up and wants to get married? Nah. 

Do you trust people soon after meeting them? No. What do you order at fast food restaurants? Most likely chicken tenders, but it depends on the place of course.  If you were to have a son, what would you name him? I’m not having kids.  Do you eat fish? No. How many of your cousins are married? Several. Many are in long-term relationships and have a family, just not married.  How many times have you gotten manicures? Once, it was for my 8th grade graduation.  Can you get to sleep anywhere or do you need certain conditions? I need to be comfortable physically and temperature wise.  Do you go to tanning beds? No. Big sunglasses, aviators or normal sized ones? None. What was your teacher's name is grade seven? I had a few teachers, like one for math, one for history, one for science, one for English.  Do you know anyone who recently got engaged? No. What color is your most comfy pair of pajamas? I have several t-shirt dresses in various colors and prints that I like to wear for pajamas and around the house.  Do you prefer to keep your issues private? I’m open here in these surveys, but I keep most things to myself in “real life” and on Facebook. I’m vague and selective with what I share on Facebook. I very rarely post anything at all to be honest.  Is the room you're in right now messy? No. Have you ever had a cat who had kittens? I’ve never had a cat.  What was the last thing to make you cringe? Hm. I don’t recall.  Has a chair you were sitting on ever collapsed? No. What is the most basic thing you know? I don’t know? Have you ever heard the song 'If you seek Amy'? Yes. Do you think watching a birth is beautiful or gross? I’m sorry, but I don’t find it beautiful lol. Does your myspace/e-mail/etc have any x's in it? Back in the day all my usernames and emails did.  What's your favorite kind of math? (Addition, division, etc) Uh, none. I hate math.  Would you rather name your daughter Rachel or Holly? I’m not having kids, but for the sake of the question I like the name Rachel better.  Have you ever ditched a friend for a guy? I kind of did in middle school. :/ Would you like to date a musician? I’m not seeking out one, but if I found a guy who happened to play an instrument I’d be into that. I’d love if they could play piano.  Do you know who Pete Wentz is? Yeah. What's your favorite thing to do on a road trip? Snack and listen to music.  What's your favorite thing to eat on a road trip? Chips and sweets. 

[mental-dilemma]

DATPT part 5

The boys have a conversation with Bruce before all hell breaks loose. 

we're gonna ignore the fact I haven't posted in months, for compensation can I give you an extra-long chapter? BTW yes I did finish editing this during class, I'm also not great with pranking siblings, and since this was the way to tell them bout Marinette/Ladybug I ran with it.

Read from the beginning:

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“Ok, Damian, have fun.” Dick turned to his brothers. “Well, boys it looks like we’ll have the apartment to ourselves Damian’s staying with Marinette tonight.”

“And you're ok with that?!” Jason asked, shocked Dick would let their youngest brother stay over with his girlfriend.

“Oh don’t give me that they’re both eighteen now and something tells me Marinette’s parents will keep more than one eye on them. So what do you guys want to do tonight.” The three brothers had decided that this trip to Paris would also be family time, especially considering how they didn’t really get any of that during the year.

“Movie?” Tim asked.

“Which one.” Jason was not watching another

“How bout this one?” Tim picked up the box that Damian had left sitting out on the coffee table earlier that morning. Jason plucked it from Tim’s hands and began reading the title. “Night of the living statue. Are you sure this doesn’t even seem scary?”

“I mean there’s always the crowbar wielding clown we could watch.”

“Oh yeah, that one got burned a while ago.”

“Fair enough.”

“So Night of the living statue it is,” Dick said, already making the popcorn.

------------------

“No don’t go into the basement, oh come on!” Jason was yelling at the screen.

“Jason you know they can’t hear you right?” Tim said rolling his eyes, which were illuminated by the laptop screen sitting in front of him.

“I don’t care Replacement the fact they’re doing it goes against every bit of common sense, it just doesn’t make, well--”

“Sense?” Dick supplied walking back into the room with the third popcorn bucket of the evening.

“Exactly I just don’t get it!” Jason held out his hands and made a grabbing motion for the bucket Dick easily sidestepped him and plopped down between the two.

“Ok, Tim popcorns back computers off.” He said as he finished getting settled.

“But I’m almost in, five more minutes and we get authentic Wayne manor security footage, and that’s better than any movie.

“Rules are rules replacement you agreed to the trade so you have to deal with it,” Jason said munching on popcorn.

“He’s right, and anyway if you keep going at it we’re gonna get a call from Al-” Right on cue, the video call screen popped up on Tim’s computer. He groaned before hitting accept.

“Hey, Alf good to see ya ol’ buddy ol’ pal! How’s the good ol’ USofA?” He said in an overly perky voice.

“Master Drake if I might request you stop attempting to hack onto the Batcave system it would be much appreciated.” Alfred’s voice rang over the call.

“Just hacking into security footage, huh?” Dick said glaring at Tim, Paris was a no hero weekend and Tim just broke that.

“I uh… I’m gonna go.” He said ending the call, moving quickly he closed his laptop grabbed a handful of popcorn, bolted over the couch to the room he was staying in, and closed the door.  

“Well, that’s the last we’ll be seeing of him tonight,” Dick said moving to grab his phone. He opened up Alfred’s contact at called him back. “Sorry, Alfred he’s just itching to get a case. He’s gotten really bored seeing Paris like a normal person, well as normal as you can get given we’re Waynes.”

“Don’t worry about it I have one of those as well.” He panned his camera over to where Bruce was sitting cowl down at the computer in the Batcave. Dick and Jason both gave a small laugh.

“How is he doing?” Dick asked.

“Oh same as usual, sulking during the night, acting like a complete buffon during the day.” Jason laughed, Dick heard Bruce mutter through the phone, and Alfred brought the camera over to Bruce.

“Hey, Bruce how ya doing?” Dick asked innocently.

“How am I doing? Let’s see Richard, my sons hijacked the plane to go to Paris on a whim with no planning whatsoever, I got a call from Damian’s school that he was absent today. I'm also dealing with a very angry Italian ambassador, oh and with all the girls out on other missions I’m dealing with the entirety of Gotham and WE by myself for who knows how long. How do you think I feel?” The bags under Bruce’s eyes were more pronounced than usual as he berated his two older sons for a few more minutes, “now do you two have a reasonable explanation, or am I going to be feeding your asses to Harley Quinn for therapy sessions this week.”

“Damian has a girlfriend,” Dick said smoothly, Alfred and Bruce both paused, looked at each other, and burst out laughing.

“Please Dick if you’re gonna come up with an excuse at least make it a plausible one,” Bruce said while Alfred was attempting to compose himself in the background.

“I’m telling the truth, her name is Marinette Dupain-Cheng. She’s in his class and apparently, they’ve been dating for the last few months.”

“I’m going to search her up and if you’re lying to me it’s three therapy sessions with Quinn.” Dick shivered remembering the last time that happened, He had been suspended over a shark tank until he admitted he needed to start putting himself first. Bruce typed a few things on the computer and let out a sharp whistle. “Well, I’ll be damned.”

“See I told you,” Dick said smugly.

“That doesn’t change the fact that---” Bruce was cut off as they heard a scream come from Tim’s room.

“Sorry, Bruce gotta go check that out. Call you later.” Dick ended the video

following Jason to Tim’s room where they saw him sitting over his computer furiously banging on the keyboard.

“Woah Woah replacement if you keep that up then there won’t be any computer left to type with.”

“I don’t care! Someone cut the power and I was in the middle of checking Parisian crime records.

“Don’t freak out,” Dick said calmly, “I’ll go check the fuse box, you and Jason can go check the router. Ok?”

“Ok,” Tim said taking a breath. He put his computer aside and walked out of the room with Jason following him. Dick tried to call Damian to find out where the fuse box was, but for some reason couldn’t get a signal inside the apartment. He walked out onto the balcony waving his phone up wildly seeing if a bar would show up. He sighed as he brought his phone down. Nothing. As he turned to go back inside he felt a small pinch on his neck he moved to swat at it and he felt nothing. As he stepped forwards his eyelids began drooping, he stumbled and reached for the railing. He missed and before he slipped into unconsciousness he felt the bite of cold cement against his arms.

---------------------------------------

When Dick woke up the sun was streaming through the living room window. He felt a weight on his stomach and when he stretched his neck up he saw Jason was lying on him, with Tim lying on the top of the pile. He laid there a moment as the night caught up to him, he began formulating who would knock them out, and how he was going to get out of this dogpile when a sharp“Ahem” sounded from the doorway. Standing there was Damian in jeans and a shirt.

“Well, it looks like you guys had a blast last night,” Marinette said poking her head in. It was the first time Dick had seen her without pigtails, instead, she had her blue-black locks tied back in a messy bun and she was suspiciously wearing Damian’s sweatshirt.  

“You want to tell me why Father called me last night wanting to know all about my girlfriend and why I hadn’t told him about her yet.” Jason and Tim gave simultaneous groans of annoyance as Dick hopped up.

“Listen Damian I can explain,” He said stepping forward. He felt something hook his foot.  “What the--” he got out before red paint came crashing down on top of him. Jason and Tim, both awake now, shot up trying in vain to avoid the downpour only to stumble into more strings. Before anyone could blink glitter rained down from the ceiling sticking to the paint coating the boys. A camera flash later saw them giving the death glare to Damian as he and Marinette stood off to the side trying not to laugh.

“What. the. Hell.” Dick said as he wiped paint from his eyes.

“If you want to live Demonspawn you better hope that this paint comes out,” Jason said as he attempted to shake glitter from his hair.

“If Con ever finds that picture Jason isn’t gonna be the one you should be scared of,” Tim said dangerously low. Damian finally cracked and started laughing. Collectively the three batboys stopped and looked up in shock. They hadn’t heard Damian laugh before, sure they’ve heard the evil laugh and the Robin laugh but never his laugh, it was soft light, and infectious. Before long Marinette was laughing too, while Jason Tim and Dick were all smiling.  

“Ok you were right that was better than anything I could think up,” Damian said as he composed himself.

“Hey give some credit to Luka,” Marinette said, “He was the one who suggested glitter.”

Jason’s eyes widened as he realized that not only did Demon spawn pull a nonlethal prank, but Marinette was in on it. Not just Marinette but some kid named Luka too.

“Wait back up, you’re telling me you guys decided that you should knock us out, and then dump red paint and glitter on us?” Tim said blearily.

“Well, we couldn’t just come out and tell you,” Marinette responded.

“Well we could, but this is revenge for your little family trip,” Damian interjected.

“Tell us what? That you hate us with a passion? You’re an evil psychopath?”

“You know for a family of detectives you guys can be rather slow.” Marinette slammed a hand over her mouth realizing what she had said. “I’m sorry I didn’t me--”

“I love you so much right now,” Damian said gawking at her, Marinette blushed.

“Ok, will one of you two please talk to us rather than whatever,” Jason gestured vaguely to the two of them, “that is.”

“What color is the glitter?” Marinette said as she turned her attention from Damian. She sounded almost like a school teacher would when talking to children.

“Black…” The boys responded in unison.

“And what color is the paint?”

“Red.”

“So what’s red and covered in black spots.”

“Lady----- Oh for fucks sake,” Tim said slapping his hand on his forehead.

“There it is,” Marinette said triumphantly, a smile spreading across her lips. A few moments later Jason and Dick both gasped as the information finally sunk in.

“Why can’t anyone in this family be normal.” The second youngest Wayne lamented.

“Well, at least this means you can join my team and me on patrols. I bet that’ll make Paris a little more interesting.” Tim perked up.

“Woah. Woah. Woah. We can talk all that out later but you need to go get cleaned up before the paint stains the carpet.” Damian interrupted, he didn’t like the fact Marinette was talking about patrol with his brothers.

“I would like to remind you that this was your plan, Damian,” Dick said.

“It may be my plan but it’s someone else’s carpet now go.”

The three boys were shepherded to the bathroom while Damian and Marinette cleaned up the mess left in the living room. All three of them were rather impressed with the way the two of them had revealed Marinette’s identity, although it went unspoken how if anyone revealed it there would be serious consequences.

It took them over an hour to even begin making a dent in the glitter-paint combination that covered their bodies. Dick having been directly under the bucket had it the worst, with Jason coming in at a close second. Jason thought he had at least gotten out the stuff in his hair during his shower, only to look in the mirror and let out a quiet fuck. Dick gave him a questioning look, in response, Jason just pointed to his hair. Where his white streak was now stained a deep crimson. “This means war.”

Tag list (closed): 

@ur-average-reader @dast218 @allulily @acoursedprophetwithasmothie @k-laconia-bug1 @smolplantmum @g-arya @loysydark @mewwitch @itsemeanne @hauntedstudent99 @pawsitivelymiraculous @clumsy-owl-4178 @eeveeofstewjon @demonicbusiness @zotinha456 @t1dwarrior-of-earth @chocolateherringtacofan @abrx2002 @toodaloo-kangaroo @wannajointhecrabcult @miraculous-simmer7 @notmycupoftea26 @legodetectivemalsblog @fusser90 @ladyrwby @buginetye

[mischiefandspirits]

Are You Sure About That?

((Warning for blood and blood drinking))

The seedy streets of Gotham were filled with whispers about the demons and monsters that roamed the city, and outsiders and Gotham’s lawful scoffed at how superstitious the criminals could be.

Gordon had worked alongside Batman enough to be quite sure there were no demons in Gotham. Sure, the vigilante was a little standoffish, but it was Gotham. Likewise, the Robins and Batgirls were all good kids. Maybe the first Robin’s smiles were a little eerie, but that was likely just the contrast with his mentor. Maybe the second and third liked morbid humor, but that was just how kids were these days. Maybe the fourth Robin was a bit temperamental and harsh, but he was young. Maybe the Batgirls’ movements were a little uncanny, but that was probably just the training. Maybe Nightwing seemed a little too cheerful about the stuff they dealt with, but the kid had been doing this since he was young. He could have a worse coping mechanism. Red Hood was the only one he’d really consider monstrous, but the guy was a former crime lord turned anti-hero and he had been getting better since the Bat had taken him under his wing.

The members of the Justice League rolled their eyes whenever someone brought up the rumors. Batman was grim, overly serious, and secretive, but he was a good man who only wanted the best and always had plan after plan to help the league succeed.

The Titans thought the rumors were hilarious. Sunshine Boy Nightwing? A demon? Who could believe the guy who was always flipping around and laughing at his own bad puns was some dark monster?

The Outlaws didn’t believe it, but they understood why someone might make the mistake of thinking Red Hood was a monster. The guy was vicious and maybe a little messed up in the head, but then again so were they.

Young Justice scoffed at the rumors. Corvid was incredibly intelligent and an incredible fighter, but he was also an absolute mess who couldn’t remember to sleep, eat, or drink on his own.

The Teen Titans stared dumbly when they heard the rumors. Sure, Robin was rude, brutal, and a bit entitled, but calling him a demon was a little much, especially considering the team had a cambion member.

The Birds of Prey ignored the rumors. Oracle was a godsend, even when she had to give up the cowl because of an unknown accident. And Batgirl was a brash spitfire, but she was always willing to lend a hand. Likewise, Huntress mostly stuck to herself, but she could be kind and personable when the time came.

The public, well, as time went on they saw more and more of Batman and his companions working with their teams on the news. It was quite clear to everyone that the group was nothing more than baseline humans with incredible training who were out to make the world a better place.

Yet the rumors persisted.

Because in the shadows of Gotham, where only the darkest of souls and their victims could see you, there was no reason to hide.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Nightwing licked the blood off his talons as he listened to Batgirl’s story, idly kicking the unconscious gangster at his feet every so often.

“Why didn’t you just kill him, Fatgirl?” Robin huffed from Nightwing’s side and the imp ruffled the tiefling’s hair, carefully avoiding his horns.

“Killing shouldn’t be your go-to option, hdiiga,” he chirped.

“Don’t do that! You’re getting saliva and common blood in my hair!” Robin snarled, slapping away his hand.

Nightwing smirked and leaned down to lick a speck of blood off his youngest brother’s cheek, pulling back quickly when Robin screeched and tried to punch him.

“I’d say it’s an improvement,” Red Hood teased as he finished tying up the gangster he’d had taken down.

“Mind your place or I will put you back in your grave!”

Wiping some blood off his mouth, Hood smiled at Robin. “Go right ahead. I could use the nap.”

“If you’re counting on me to resurrect you, I’ll remind you that the last time I did that, you tried to banish me,” Red Robin said, not looking up from the laptop he was hacking into as his shadows soaked up the blood on him.

Nightwing and Batgirl groaned as the zombie and demon settled into a familiar argument.

“Well maybe if you’d brought me back properly as you did for your blonds, then I wouldn’t have tried to banish you.”

“That was different! I was less experienced when I brought you back!”

“I should have been easier to bring back! I was already a zombie!”

“EXACTLY! You came with a bunch of extra complications!”

“Are you two ever going to let this go?” Batgirl asked, eyes on the gangster she had knocked out. His face was twitching with distress as she twirled her fingers across his forehead, occasionally pulling them away to see the small moment of peace he got before she began brushing them across his forehead again. The revenant looked up at Robin and winked. “And killing’s boring, Human-Bird. Everything ends way too fast.”

Robin clicked his tongue. “I will never understand why we should waste our time torturing someone who has nothing worth telling? If we’re not going to kill them then why bother attacking them at all?”

“Because it’s fun?” Nightwing and Batgirl said together.

“There’s always something you can get out of someone, even if it’s just sustenance?” Red Robin offered.

Hood shrugged when the tiefling turned to him. “Don’t look at me. I’m the white sheep, remember. The only reason I could give you is that listening to B lecture about maintaining appearances by limiting deaths and going after insignificant criminals gets really annoying after a while, and that’s never stopped me.”

“Are you five done?” Oracle’s hissing voice echoed through the alley as the green mist that had been hovering across the ground began to rise in serpentine forms.

“Just finished downloading the data you wanted,” Red Robin said, closing the laptop and passing a thumb drive to the snake coiling up him.

“Alright, the police are three minutes out so either clean yourselves up or get out of there.”

“I will head in. I need to wash off the common blood and,” Robin glared at Nightwing, “saliva.”

The imp smiled back unrepentantly. “I’ll go with you, hdiiga.”

“I should probably take off as well,” Hood said as the two left. “I still need to check on a few things in my territory. Maybe grab another bite to eat.”

“Please clean up after yourself this time. I don’t exist just to disappear all your bodies.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll behave. Not really in the mood for a lecture from His Majesty anyways,” Hood said with an eye roll and swatted the serpent on him off so he could grapple away.

“Guess it’s just you and me on babysitting duty, Red,” Batgirl said. She stood up and stretched before walking over to Red Robin. “Mind helping a lady freshen up?”

The demon snorted, but his shadows rose to clean the blood off her. As they waited, Red Robin raised his guise to make him appear human and Batgirl pulled up her scarf to hide the part of her pure-white face that wasn’t covered by the cowl.

Once they’d gone through the motions with the humans, Red Robin took off on his bike and Batgirl headed up to the roofs.

“Alright, O. Take me home!”

The green mist that had nearly disappeared in the presence of the humans flared to life and condensed into a large serpent that coiled around the revenant until she couldn’t see anything but green. The mist dispersed after a moment, leaving her standing within a summoning circle at the center of the Clocktower.

Oracle was sitting in front of her at a desk surrounded by computer screens and candles with green flames. A scrying bowl sat in front of her and a laptop was across her lap. As Batgirl stepped out of the circle, the scrying bowl stopped glowing and the candles went out all at once. The otherworlder set her keyboard on her desk and spun her chair around to face Batgirl, the white light fading from her eyes and the light from the screen catching eerily on the cracks across her skin that kept her from glamoring.

As she pulled down her cowl, Stephanie tossed Barbara a pendant glowing with psychic energy. “Brought home dinner!”

“Thanks. Your dinner is in the oven. Tiết canh.”

“You’re the best!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hdiiga is an Impish term. It directly translates to mean an infant imp, but it more generally is used as a term of endearment used by parents for their children or older siblings for their younger siblings.

For the record since they didn't appear:

Bruce is a demon king from the same demonic realm as Tim

Selina is a demigoddess who was granted powers by a cat goddess and, as a result, can reincarnate up to nine times

Helena is a cambion that came about as a result of a shared night between Bruce and one of Selina's past lives

Talia is completely human as was Damian's father (Damian's tiefling traits are a result of Talia and Ra's infusing Damian with Bruce's power during his time in the incubator in hopes of earning Demon!Bruce's favor. They are not aware that Demon!Bruce and Batman!Bruce are the same person)

Bernard is also a revenant (he and Steph were the blonds Jason mentioned)

[queerbutstillhere]

Are you still taking prompts? How about a Jondami and Robin!Reversal AU, where Damian's little Bros give Jon a shovel talk.

(Okay so I've gotten a lot of shovel talk requests, but this one immediately called to me. Thank you for sending it in!

Jon - 23, Damian - 20, Tim - 17, Jason - 14, Dick - 12 )

Jon hummed to himself as he flew over the greater part of Delaware and New Jersey. He hummed a little louder as he created a small sonic boom. He barely blinked as miles of fields and cities blurred beneath him.

He had one destination in mind tonight, and he intended to get there on time.

When he reached Gotham, it was nearing sunset. He didn't even hesitate to enter the city, despite the ban on metas, and weaved through the tall building seamlessly, flying across town and to Wayne Manor. The grounds security systems didn't even bother to activate, thanks to the device Damian had given him, a small beacon pin that told both the metahuman tracker and the manor security systems to ignore him. He had two of them, one was pinned to his uniform, the other lived on his keys so he wouldn't loose it.

He landed in front of the door and rang the doorbell, leaning against the wall as he waited, knowing it'd be a few minutes. Three minutes later, he heard footsteps, then the lock disengaging. And then the door swung open. It was opened by a child who barely reached Jon's chest.

"Dick! Hey there!"

"Hi Jon!" Dick said with a wide grin.

The twelve year old was wearing what appeared to be a school uniform, and had a water bottle in one hand, his messy black hair falling all over the place.

"Is Damian here?"

"He's downstairs with B."

"Oh. That explains why I couldn't hear him."

"Yup! Come in, they should be up here soon for dinner though!"

Dick let him inside and Jon glancing around, casting out with his hearing to note Alfred in the kitchen, and Tim and Jason in the living room. Dick started heading that way.

"Come on!" He said cheerfully, walking like everything was fine and dandy.

Jon followed him, despite the sudden gut feeling that he should go hang out with Alfred. They walked into the living room and instantly he wanted to turn around and walk to the kitchen. Tim and Jason were sat in two armchairs, the sofa on the other side of the coffee table.

"Have a seat, Jonathan," Tim said, motioning.

Jon sighed, looking down at Dick.

"I can't believe you set me up."

"Get used to it!" The kid ran away and jumped up to sit on Jason's arm rest.

Jon just sighed again and walked over, sitting on the empty sofa.

"We need to have a talk," Jason told him.

"About this." Tim set a phone on the coffee table. It was solid black, no personalization on the case, but Jon recognized it instantly.

"Uh. That's your brothers phone."

"Clearly."

"I didn't just lift a random phone off him, Jon, we know it's his," Jason said with an eyeroll.

"Okay, why do you have his phone?" Jon asked, warily.

"So we could hack it."

"Wait a minute-"

"Who gave you permission to date our brother?" Dick asked, crossing his arms and glaring at Jon.

"Can we just talk about the fact that you hacked his phone?"

"Okay, technically we didn't hack it. We made Dick ask to play games on it."

"What did they offer you, Dick?"

None of them answered. Jon narrowed his eyes.

"You're getting off topic," Jason said, redirecting the conversation. "We want to know why you're dating Damian."

"Does Bruce know?"

"We haven't told him."

"Okay. I'm dating him because I really really like him," Jon said, willing to cave to the brothers, considering how long they'd actually been dating without the families knowledge.

"How long?" Dick asked, surprisingly menacing for a tiny twelve year old.

"A year."

"A what?!" Jason exclaimed, eyes wide.

Jon shrugged.

"Why you- I oughta!"

Tim held out a hand to stop Jason.

"Not yet. We still have some things to discuss. When did Damian give you access to Gotham?"

"Uh, like, five years ago, Tim. It's been eons."

"When were you going to tell us?"

"When Damian decided to. It wasn't up to me."

"And if it was, would you have told us?"

"Not if Damian didn't want me to."

"And why wouldn't he have wanted us to know?" Tim asked, eyebrow arching.

"Well maybe because he knew you'd attempt some elaborate shovel talk like this!"

The three brothers exchanged glances.

"So you recognize that if you hurt him we will kill you?" Jason asked.

"If I hurt him, I know very well that He'll hurt me, let alone you guys. He knows how, he has kryptonite."

"And what exactly does he do with that Kryptonite?" Jason asked, tilting his head.

The look he was giving Jon sent chills down his back.

"Oh, my God! You're fourteen, you should NOT be thinking about that!"

"For the record? I read your texts, I know very well what he does with it," Tim inputted, wincing. "And I want to burn my eyes."

"Are you- are you kidding me?! That's it."

Jon stood, reaching out and snatching Damian's phone before anyone else could.

"I've had enough of this. Not only have you illegally accessed his phone, you have breached both his and I's privacy by reading our text conversations. That is unacceptable and you can be damn well sure I'm telling him about this. Tim, I'm disappointed in you, acting like this. You should know better."

Jon turned to march out, feeling anger boiling in his body.

"If you tell him, then I'll have no choice but to tell Bruce, and you know he'll immediately disable your beacons."

Jon froze, turning back to Tim, who had also stood, smirking wickedly.

"Not only that, but we might just leak that pretty background of his."

Oh no. The background was a photo of them at the pool last year, they were both shirtless, and Damian was sat in Jon's lap. They were kissing. The lock screen was totally different, however, to avoid suspicion.

"Okay, now you're blackmailing me? Geesh Tim, you're more of a sadistic shit then Kon said."

"He has no idea the lengths I'll go to in order to protect my big brother."

Jon sighed, rubbing his face.

"Okay. Fine. I won't tell Damian what we talked about or that you got in his phone. As long as you promise not to do it again and promise not to tell Bruce."

The three brothers exchanged glances.

"No manipulating. Either you agree or you don't."

"That won't be a problem," Tim said with a sweet smile.

His heart ticked up a bit.

"Are you really trying to bullshit me? Tim I'm literally a human lie detector."

"You think I'm lying to you?"

"I'm dating your brother, I can tell when one of you bats is lying, I had to learn. So I don't think you're lying. I know you are."

Tim scowled. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"You know what, fine. I'm telling him. And I can bet he won't be very impressed."

"Tell who what?"

The brothers eyes all went wide as their gaze snapped to the doorway behind Jon. Jon recognized that voice immediately. Of course he did, he had been hearing that voice for ten years, and knew exactly what it'd sound like when begging.

"Damian."

He turned around, smiling brightly at his boyfriend.

"Hello, Jonathan... Why do you have my phone?"

"Oh, your brothers broke into it, read our texts, tried to give me a shovel talk and are now blackmailing me."

Damian hummed. "Blackmailing you with what?"

"Telling Bruce, leaking photos of us, and deactivating my access to Gotham."

Another hum, and he nodded for a second. The eldest child turned his gaze to his younger siblings.

"Well, I'll have you know, your first threat is useless. Father already knows. Secondly, that is a breach of privacy, as is reading our texts, and should you do so, the repercussions will not be enjoyable. Additionally, not even you, Drake, can take away his access," Damian said smoothly, snatching his phone from Jon's hand. "Thank you for telling me, beloved. And I apologize for their behavior."

Jon smiled at him. "It's okay, not your fault."

"Ugh! Damian why can't you let us have our fun?!" Jason protested, glaring at his older brother.

"Because you have nothing to worry about. Jon is a good man, and a good boyfriend. But. If giving him a shovel talk is all you really need to accept our relationship, then go ahead. You have-" he looked at his watch. "Five minutes until dinner."

"Wait, what?!" Jon asked, turning to Damian again.

"You'll be fine, beloved. I'll see you at dinner!"

Damian walked over, kissed him quickly, much to the dismay of his sibling, and then walked away.

"Damian!"

"You're a invincible alien, Kent, you'll be fine."

And so his boyfriend abandoned Jon with his three younger siblings, who all grinned at Jon like he was a fish among sharks.

"Oh no."

[emeraldgreaves]

7,8,15 and 20 - detective ask game.

Whoops. This sat in my drafts for a long time. Thank you for the ask!

I’m answering for Moira Lin, my main detective.

7. Who is their Love Interest and why?

Nate Sewell! Moira is someone who is deeply loving except when it comes to herself - Nate wants her to feel loved, treasured, and supported. He’s thoughtful and careful about the little details - making her tea perfectly, watching out for her comfort and safety, openly answering all of her questions. He can also draw out some of her wit. In Nate, she finds a space where she can let go of all the pressure to support everyone around her, and gets a space to breathe and laugh and be herself. He cherishes her deeply. It’s extremely sweet.

They’re both also unapologetically huge nerds. Moira genuinely says ‘Just so you know, I like museums too’, leading to Nate (1) being very pleased (2) undoubtedly planning an elaborate museum world tour with her.

There are two unspoken points of angst for them. The first is that if Nate were human, they would have a quiet, lovely life together with good food and a million books and museum dates and two children and a dog - something that is impossible for them given his immortality. The second is that they’re both stupidly selfless and loving to the point of sacrifice. They would die for each other, but neither wants the other to die for them. The things that draw them together are also the things that could be their downfall, to say nothing of whatever N is hiding from us.

8. What's their relationship with their mom like? How did it change?

Moira loves her mother dearly and looked up to her as a child. They aren’t too close emotionally, and she wishes it were better. She’s initially very by-the-book because a lifetime of being passed around to various caregivers made her anxious to be a perfect child - excelling at hobbies, following rules, keeping things together. Following all the rules made her mother happy and gives her less to worry about, especially given the stress of her job. I’d like to think that this Rebecca tried to make an effort to be present on their days off, especially as she got older.

The supernatural reveal is hard, mostly because she has difficulty dealing with the harsh reality that yes, her mother has to do some awful things in order to keep supernaturals in line. She understands why you keep things like this hidden, especially from a child, but it doesn’t help bridge the gap emotionally. By Book 2, they start cautiously making inroads towards connecting as people. Progress is slow, but there.

15. What do they think of Unit Bravo? How has that changed throughout the story?

Wayhaven is such a heavy found family narrative and I revel in it.

Adam du Mortain and Moira ‘life hack: just be nice to people’ Lin butt heads a bit initially. Moira found him to be stubborn and domineering, and he finds her to be too emotionally involved in their work. Those opinion haven’t changed, but they’ve developed strong mutual respect. They share the same sense of when to maintain professional composure, and they’re united in caring deeply about Nate.

Moira and Nate were on the same wavelength from the beginning. I’ve covered their relationship pretty well in the LI answer.

Felix’s boundless energy, open flirtation, and general openness throws her off at first, but once she gets the vibe of the general give-and-take when he flirts at her in the alleyway they settle into an easy rhythm of friendship. They’ve developed a sibling bond of sorts - she helps him learn stuff in low-risk environments, and he helps her loosen up a little. She’s was so worn down by her job and the crushing mundane life of wayhaven that she’d forgotten the joy of discovering things.

Mason is a tough nut to crack. They remain extremely tense throughout Book 1 - in Book 2 when she snaps a little and makes the comment about compensation, she’s surprised by his reaction. That’s when it clicks that he likes to be challenged, and she starts dropping the witty quips more often. It’s easier now that she’s more comfortable with UB to be herself - there’s an odd sort of camaraderie that comes with keeping a secret. They’ve become the people who know her best.

20. What is their personality?

Charming // Cautious // Genuine // Friendly // equally Easygoing & Stubborn // Heart // Optimist // Team Player

Rebecca quickly realizes during Book 1 that her intelligent, observant, self-sufficient, and persistent daughter is not going to make life easy. She falls somewhere between mom friend & grandma friend - everyone she cares about owns at least one handknit item, and she brings a lot of food into the office. She has a deeply ingrained sense of compassion that can only have come from Rook, though she can develop blinders when it comes to doing things that help people.

[tarithenurse]

Orphan - 4

Starring:  Fem!Reader and MCU characters! Contents: Spoilers for Endgame!! Cussing (as usual, take that for granted), some fluff, some angst, confusion, sadness, loss, good intentions, awkwardness, flashbacks. Feels...there are feels. A/N: So this is getting a surge. PREVIOUS CHAPTERS can be found on the masterlist. I’ve added more names to the tag list (because no one ever tells me they want in but still “like” anyways…so HA!). As per usual. Thanks for likes and reblogs and comments and tears…cheers! I mean cheers! ;)

4. Foster Care for Adults

…   Reader   …

You’ve had no energy to protest, but if you’d had then it’s likely nothing would’ve changed the mind of the grim mohawk-dude. Clint Barton, archer extraordinaire and known as Hawkeye, who (after squaring it with the wife) has opened his home to you and herded you onto a little dangerous-looking plane together with his family. The two older kids, Lila and Cooper, don’t say much if anything to you. Well, the little one doesn’t either, but at least he’s staring openly rather than pretending to be busy with the phones or each other.

“Mo-om?” Nathaniel’s clear voice cuts over the sound of the engine. “Is she gonna be my sisther?”

In a flash you’re back to the childhood where terms like siblings and parents were used too loosely or as a means to hurt you, keep you separate from other kids at school. Even within the foster home, there were kids who wielded those kinds of words as weapons, cutting deep reminders into your heart to make sure you never forget what you’d lost. As if that was possible.

In the same flash, the little kid should have fallen over dead from the glared his siblings send him. Turned into dust. Of course, he doesn’t notice, but looks at his mom for an answer she hardly can give.

“Listen guys.” Clint pushes a few buttons before turning the pilot entire seat to face everyone. “I know this is a…surprise. [Y/N] came back from the Blip too and she has nowhere to stay…” Nathaniel merrily begins to hum a song under his breath made up entirely of bleeps. “She’s gonna be a guest until things are sorted out, okay?”

It’s toe-cringing to listen to the Avenger give The Speech™. He means well. Facts are you’re an adult who can talk for yourself, and you don’t have as much of a choice in coming as Clint makes it sound.

 Sitting on the bed of the motel, you didn’t know which hero to look at - none of them were the one you needed to get answers because Stark was dead and with him the hope of a better explanation than the documents and files on the tiny drive provided. Facts. The facts were there…but it wasn’t enough.

“How did you find out about the fu-“ Rhodes had to take a deep breath before continuing, “about the funeral?”

He already knew more about you than you liked, such as your (now delayed) university degree in Medicine and Technology where you’d been working on cutting edge ways to deliver medicine to the right place in the body with biodegradable nano-bots. Tony Stark and his old-time pal had kept track of you ever since you were born and your father decided to split…as if that somehow should compensate for the absence. Still, Rhodes and his buddies were questioning you for more information.

Glaring at the furrowed brows, you decided you already were royally fucked. “Watched the news, put two-n-two together, hacked a phone.”

“What do you want from Pepper ‘nd Morgan?” There it was – the protectiveness.

“Nothin’, I just…the Blue Group chick already asked me this!”

On and on they had gone, never relenting despite the circles you were talking in. In the end, only the talking raccoon was stubborn enough to continue (though both the coloured women had offered assistance by torture).

 A shiver runs down your spine at the memory. Yeah, it’s a good thing Clint Barton decided to bring you along even if it’s just to keep an eye on you rather than help. You send Laura a shadow of a smile before unbuckling from the seat to make your way over to the pilot’s seat. The domed sky is intense, partially coloured with the drama of sunset but also much darker above the plane than you’d expected. It stretches towards the curve of the horizon, dotted with fluffy clouds. Far underneath are the rolling fields smaller than a fingernail, roads like grey thread cutting through a landscape until it finds a glowing pearl, a town where the lights are starting to shine.

“Not a bad view, huh?” The comment is so relaxed that you almost think it’s your imagination until the archer sends you a shy smile.

Maybe he’s not that bad. “Yeah…’s pretty.” There’s a silence between the two of you – less forced, somehow. “It’s umm nice of you to…y’know, let me stay. Better than a motel with a raccoon and a blue assassin.”

…

I’m gonna die! Clint Barton has landed the plane in the middle of fucking nowhere and you’ve never been further from civilization as you are now. Even in the darkness, you can feel the forest sighing, long branches creaking in the autumn wind as they try to reach you and the Bartons (who are completely unfazed by it). Give me streetlights! Anything! Flashes on phones light up the ground, granting your wish to a certain point.

At least they lead you away from the trees, and while it’s still night with no moon the darkness isn’t quite as dense out in the open. Tall grass catch on your salvaged boots and there’s a very distinct feeling of something chasing you…but nothing when you turn to look. For a second, you whish you were in Nathaniel’s place: he’s sound asleep on Laura’s arm, drool wetting her shoulder each time his head bounces from the steps she takes.

The house appears from the dark as a huge, even darker mass before the lights reach far enough to illuminate the wooden steps of the porch. Lila’s ahead, skipping up the steps and reaching the screen door where she flips a switch. Suddenly, stringed lights spread their glow and the house feels wonderfully real and safe even if it’s still dark inside.

 …   Clint   …

The house still smells musty after years of misuse and there’s a ton of things for him to fix. The boiler works, though, and Laura and the kids have been busy cleaning the last few days while Clint took care of the leaks in the roof and the stock of firewood. Mostly, he’d walked in a daze simply to look at them, touch their hair, pull them into awkward hugs in the hopes it wouldn’t just be a dream.

I didn’t think I’d be back to live here. Clint had tried at first to be on his own, but it was wrong – an empty house full of the ghosts of his family and memories that threatened with eluding him even if the smallest item or scent brought them crashing down on him with a force that’d knock his legs away. That was why he went to stay with Nat at the Compound. She dealt by doing things, trying to clean up the mess one crime or fucked up situation at a time because there weren’t enough cops, no military strong enough. The remnants of the Avengers was needed and the two of them teamed up with others…and nothing was right anyways.

“Baby?” A soft hand curls around his elbow before stroking his triceps. Laura. “We’re here, honey, we’re with you again.”

She understands him better than anyone. The five years felt like seconds for Laura, but she understands how fucked up it was for him and how afraid he is that they’ll suddenly be gone again. Pulling her tight, Clint buries the nose in her dark hair to maybe memorize the scent, at least to have her inside and out.

“You’re the best wife I could ever want,” he mumbles.

Laura smiles against the collar of his t-shirt, making his heart flutter. “Oh, I know,” she smirks, “any other wife would’ve lost it after coming home to such a mess!”

It’s a joke and it does make him laugh…but it hurts too because now he’s added to the mess that’s their lives. “…or taken in a stranger.”

“Hm.” It’s almost a tiny scoff. “She needs a home and we have that. I just…it’s a horrible way to find out about your heritage. She must be so confused?”

 …   Reader   …

Fed, watered, and teeth brushed? Done.

Bed, check.

Borrowed pyjama that’s only a little bit musty, check.

Settling down under the thick covers, it’s impossible not to enjoy having an entire guest room for yourself rather than the dorm at the hostel where ten other people snore and fart all night long. Tonight you’re going to sleep great, you decide as you turn off the bed side lamp. Your eyelids are heavy. It’s so dark, you can’t tell if you already have closed the eyes or not. Silence and sleep, here I come.

The wind outside the window picks up in strength, finding a gap between two boards to whistle with when the gusts hit just right. Somewhere in the house a floorboard creaks – maybe Clint is tugging his kids in? And then it might be his wife who’s using the water, making the pipes gurgle inside the wall. Whenever one sound ends another takes over, all unexpected and unfamiliar enough that they startle you awake. Burrowing deeper under the duvet, you try to cover the ears but then it’s your own heartbeat you can hear instead, thumping away with a constant rush of blood that mingles with the sighs of the wind.​

[fatbottombucky]

That’s Stark’s Boy *Peter Parker x Reader*

Christmas Special: Bonus Chapter

Summary: After getting kicked out of school and following the wrong crowd your mother sends you to live with your father - at least you’re away from her layabout boyfriend. But your dad happens to be Tony Stark, he enrolled you into a new school and enlisted the help of his faithful protege to help you feel welcome. Not only are you the new kid but you gotta balance the Stark Expectations AND you’re living with a bunch of heroes… also, lest you forget that a certain red-suited hero makes it difficult to keep your sexuality a secret.

Pairings: Peter Parker x Male!Reader / Tony Stark (dad) x Reader (son)

Warnings: Swearing & Reader having no clue what to do with himself

Word Count: 2654

Author’s Note: This can be read on it’s own, but it is part of my That’s Stark’s Boy universe, and it would make more sense if you read the series. But you don’t have to and it’s set after Civil War, but before Infinity War. - Rosalie 

You can That’s Stark’s Boy Masterlist on my blog.

The smell of eggnog filled your senses, the warmth of the fire heated up your skin almost instantly. The bright, colourful lights illuminated the walls and an eight-foot tree that sat in the corner. The festive music was playing quietly in the background, the voice of Mariah Carey, you silently sang hummed along to the festive track.

Your eyes found the man you had been looking for, your father was standing on a ladder placing the final touches to the Christmas decorating and a Santa’s hat donned the top of his head. You let out a light chuckle, Tony was singing loudly along to the Christmas song, holding some sparkly tinsel and hooking it above the fireplace.

“It’s looking very… fantastical in here,” you mused as you looked around.

Tony had gone above and beyond, there was a festive miniature village set on the coffee table, many woodland creature decorations were perched vicariously through the living room. So, so much glitter was dusted on every surface, glittering lights were strapped around the room and around every window. Fake snow was sprinkled on the real Christmas tree, you looked closer and recognised that every bauble on the tree was, in fact, Avengers themed. Christmas presents were wrapped under the tree in Avengers wrapping paper.

“You mean Winter Wonderland, right?” Tony shot back, stepping down from the ladder and admiring his handy work. It was only then you realised he had the help from his favourite creations, Dum-H and U, also decorated with lights twirled and twisted around them, “Good work guys, really love what you have done with your corner.”

You shake your head at your father’s antics, “Thought you didn’t buy into this gimmicky Christmas stuff?”

“Well, this is our first Christmas together, properly,” Tony shrugged and you nodded lightly, “I just… want to do it right, make it special for you, for us. Unless you hate it, I can redecorate, I have some other decorations-”

You shake your head, smiling brightly, “I love it. It’s so extra and absolutely gay.”

“Well, I’ve discovered Queer Eye and I’m not looking back,” Tony mutters and glances at you, you both burst into fits of laughter at Tony’s ridiculous antics.

You patted Tony’s shoulder before walking towards the Christmas Tree, admiring all the Avengers-themed decorations. You glanced at one, tilting your head slightly and your heart tightening in your chest, the clear bauble had a picture inside of it. A photo of Tony, smiling happily at a baby, that baby is you. You had never seen the photo before and you were far too young to remember the moment, you smiled gently and quickly regained composure before directing your attention to the many wrapped gifts underneath.

“Who are all these for?” Before Tony could say anything you read the labels, “Steve? Natasha? Sam… do you think they’ll come?” You turned and looked over your shoulder to your father.

He gave a gentle shrug and not looking at you, his lips were turned into a tight-lipped smile. “I… haven’t asked them to,” he mutters and you nod, standing up and walking to sit on the sofa, “I just figured, maybe, if they had nowhere to go… it’s been two years, they skipped last year and I understand. I just like setting up just in case.”

You nodded silently, “Well, it’s Christmas and I’m here, it’d be rude if they missed this.”

Tony let out a soft chuckle and nodded.

**

You sat at your father’s computer in his lab in silence, your fingers tapping patterns on the desk and a deeply serious expression present on your face. You had been down in his lab for over twenty minutes, debating with yourself on whether you should go through with it. He wanted to see them, at least, he thinks he does. After what happened with the Avengers almost two years ago, it was radio silence between them all, Tony hadn’t heard a peep from anybody- except Vision, but contact with him was little to none.

Against your better judgement you quickly typed in Tony’s password, one thing you did take from Tony was his excellent technology mind. You easily hacked into the computer and began to scroll through the various contacts; a snort escaped you at some of the names. Till you found the name you had been looking for, it doesn’t take a genius to know where the Avengers would scurry off to and that they’d all be in contact.

You clicked the contact and waited patiently to be connected, your fingers began tapping nervously on the desk and so did your foot. The sound of the tapping echoed through the quiet lab, your eyes nervously glanced around the room to the various stuff that was littered around. The ‘ping’ of being connected made you snap your attention to the screen, then the face that could, potentially, make Christmas happen flashed on the screen.

“You don’t know me, I’m Y/N Stark and I don’t know you, but I really need your help.”

**

“Six days till Christmas,” you yell walking into Mj’s house and being greeted by her older brother, he raised an eyebrow at you before calling to Mj, her head poked out from around her bedroom door and tilted her head. “I haven’t got Pete a present!” You exclaim.

You followed Mj to the kitchen, where she was helping her brother make Christmas cookies to take to see her grandparents on Christmas Eve. “Why don’t you just ask him what he wants?” She asked with a slight shrug and you scoffed, “What? That’s what I did, him and Ned gave me a few ideas.”

“I can’t ask, especially now,” Mj cocked a brow at you, “he’s apparently gotten me the perfect gift, he doesn’t want to know the list because I’m going to love what he’s got me,” you sighed dramatically. “If I ask what he wants then I’m the shit boyfriend, I should know what he wants, right?”

It’s silent as the two Jones’ siblings cut the cookies into the Christmas trees, each eyeing one another and deciding who should talk first. Before either of them can begin to help or give advice you sit down dramatically, grabbing a cookie that’s already been baked and place it in your mouth before Mj can take it away.

“Figuring out what to get my boyfriend for Christmas is hard,” you groan, “like he already has everything he could ever want… me.”

Mj and Warren end up laughing loudly, each hunching over to let out loud laughs. You end up joining them, chuckling with the duo. You end up helping the pair with decorating the cookies and listening to their ideas of presents for Peter. Although, all of them good, they didn’t sound perfect or right and you wanted the perfect gift for him since he had found the one for you.

*Peter’s P.OV*

“Ned, I can’t give him that,” Peter chuckled as his best friend held up a Spider-Man action figure, “It’s gotta be perfect, the best gift ever because he’s the best boyfriend,” Ned rolled his eyes at Peter from across the store.

“Why did you tell him you got him the perfect gift?” Peter shrugged, “if it doesn’t live up to expectations he’s gonna be pissed.”

Peter shakes his head, “It’s the thoughts that count, right? He’ll see how hard I’ve tried and appreciate whatever I get,” he tries to defend himself as he looks across the various shelves of stuff and trinkets to get, nothing really grabbing his attention.

He sighs gently and rubs his temples, he turns to Ned and shakes his head. Both leaving the shop to go to the next and start the whole ordeal all over again. If anything it started to become tedious for the two teenage boys, Peter had no idea what to get you and since this was his first Christmas with his first ever boyfriend, he just wanted it to go well and great.

*Normal P.O.V/ Christmas Day*

You were awoken to loud banging on your door, it swings open to reveal your dad, already dressed and ready for Christmas to begin. You wanted to be in the festive spirit but couldn’t bring yourself to actually wake up and be as energetic. Then you felt yourself being shaken, you groaned as Tony kept shaking your tired body awake.

“Can you stop?” You asked, sitting up and rubbing the sleep from your eyes.

“C’mon it’s Christmas, it’s already noon and Peter is here with his Aunt,” You perked up almost instantly and Tony chuckled, “get dressed, we have to open presents.”

You nodded and got out bed, stumbling into your bathroom as Tony left and closed your bedroom door. A big part of you wondered if they’d actually show up, he had told you he would try and convince them to but that it would be difficult, and awkward if they did show up. You got dressed relatively quickly and actually managed to look good.

Grabbing the presents for Peter and May, walking down the hall towards the living room where everyone was already sat with glasses of drinks and chatting. You placed the presents down and was already brought into a hug by Pepper, squeezing you gently and wishing you a Merry Christmas. Then you were brought into a hug by May, you chuckled lightly when she kissed your cheek.

“Merry Christmas, ladies.” Pepper passed you a glance of champagne, “Of course, that’s Tony’s tradition.”

You looked around the room, searching for your boyfriend and coming up with nothing for the short boy with the unruly hair. May nudged you and pointed to the kitchen where you could see Peter and Tony trying to sort out dinner, annoyingly Tony is an amazing cook, something he picked up from is half-Italian mother and from countless sleepless nights.

You smiled gently at the sight of Peter and Tony laughing with one another, your heart growing and beating faster at the sight. You glanced at Pepper who was smiling to herself, eyeing Tony with sweet-heart eyes and that made you grin. Your eyes then drift to May, who is doing the same but with kind, gentle and loving eyes at Peter.

“Wow,” you mutter, “I’m literally a wife.” You make both Pepper and May laugh loudly, both sloshing their drinks as they use your shoulders to hold themselves up.

You end up grabbing the attention of Tony and Peter, both walking through the door and eyeing the three of you with narrowed eyes. Peter raises his eyebrows at you, a soft smile on his lips and you’re still chuckling as you shrug. Peter walks up to you and wraps an arm around your waist, you wrap an arm around his shoulders with a grin looking down at him.

Peter leans up slightly and you pull back, “Umm, there’s no mistletoe. Christmas rules, Peter.” He rolls his eyes at you before you can make another remark the elevator to the tower dings and the doors slide open.

It’s silent as the people file out, all awkwardly shuffling into the living room. You quickly pull away from Peter’s grip and walk towards Tony, who has stopped mid-conversation with May and eyeing them all confusedly, his mouth agape at them.

“Merry Christmas, Tony.” Steve waves, he has a leather jacket on and stubble surrounding the lower part of his face. “We got the message from T’Challa,” he explains and Tony shakes his head, even more confused, “your son, Y/N, he got in contact with T’Challa. We all decided to come along, hope that’s okay?” Steve looks over his shoulder at Bucky, who is shuffling hastily behind Sam.

Tony’s eyes drift to you, “You… did… you guys are here?” They all nodded, Natasha, Sam and Wanda, including Vision. You smiled and nodded at Tony, “Well, um, come on in. Dinner is almost ready and we’re about to open presents.”

Natasha instantly bounded up to you, securing you into a hug and you chuckled, “You’ve gotten so big,” she says and looks up at you. “You’re now Steve’s height,” she mused and you chuckled lightly.

“How have you been?”

She shakes her head, “Time for that later. It’s Christmas and I brought you something from Wakana, well, Shuri sends her love to you. She follows your Instagram,” you raised your eyebrows at the thought of the Princess of Wakana actually following you on social media.

You, somehow, end up in a deep conversation with Bucky and Steve. The presents still not unwrapped, the dinner still left uneaten. Everyone just enjoying one another’s company, you finally ended up meeting Vision, after years of hearing Jarvis’s voice… to now seeing a symbiotic android using his voice was strange but a good type.

“So, you and the Spider-Kid, huh?” Steve asked with a knowing grin and you could feel yourself blush, not out of embarrassment.

“You know, the kid has heart,” Bucky begins, “I’ll give him that, but if he webs me to the floor again with Sam, I’mma beat his ass.” You chuckled along with Steve.

You smiled at Steve, “Didn’t think you’d actually come here.”

“I didn’t think I would,” Steve admits and eyes his drink for a moment, “but Christmas is about family and Tony needs his family, so we’re here.”

**

“I can’t believe they all showed up,” you muttered to Peter once finally alone. He nodded in agreement, “Christmas miracle.”

Peter rolled his eyes, “You’re such a dork.” You scoff at the nerd boy, who just smiled and pulled a delicately wrapped gift from behind his back. The wrapping paper was a metallic red with a gold bow tied around it, Peter clearly didn’t wrap this.

You grinned and pulled out the gift for him, presented in blue wrapping paper with a white ribbon bow tied around the box and mini Sharpie doodles drawn on the wrapping paper. You exchanged gifts and in the silence unwrapped them, you glanced at Peter who was too focused on delicately unwrapping how own to notice that you were focused on him.

You nimbly unwrapped the gift, pulling the bow away and ripping the paper open and frowning for a few seconds at the present. A watery smile starts to come across your face, your eyes tearing up at the thought gone into the gift. A photo of you and Peter are in a frame, along with the tickets of the movie you saw on your first date. There was also the jacket you had wanted, it was Peter’s and he never wore it and you’d borrow it if you forgot your own, but ultimately give it back.

“This is…” you begin and choke slightly, “this is really lovely.” You manage to get out, looking up and smiling at Peter, who is also wearing a hopelessly affectionate smile because of your gift.

Ben’s old camera, Peter’s uncle had an old classic camera. It had stopped working long ago, so as a gift you decided to buy some film for it and get it repaired- permission from May too, of course. Peter had mentioned how much he enjoys taking photos, his own Instagram account is compiled of artsy shots he’s taken as Peter and as Spider-Man, skyline views and amazing shots of the city at night. The few odd ones of you and Mj, plus Ned.

“We’re a couple of hopeless romantic fools,” you chuckle but wipe your eyes to stop the tears from falling.

Peter nods, also chuckling lightly with you. You smile softly at one another, Peter’s face illuminated by the Christmas lights that were strung up around your bed frame. You gently take ahold of Peter’s hand, the loud chatting and laughter of the Avengers travelling down the hallway fall of deaf ears. Yourself and Peter are in your own world, staring at one another before leaning in towards one another.

(You can find That’s Stark’s Boy Masterlist on my blog. Hope you guys have a good holiday, and I hope you liked this. I know it’s short, but I just wanted to post something super cute. You can read this without reading the series, but it will make more sense to.Obviously, the fic the reader won’t meet the Avengers just yet, but for Christmas let’s pretend they show up to be with Tony. - Rosalie)

[authenticaussie]

for the spell character's name: A, C, E and S, A, B, O

A: What are/were this character’s best subjects in school?

He’s really good with his hands! So shop class/woodwork were his favourites - he can make like. So many things??? He’s pretty talented at making Something out of Basically Nothing. Twine and a stick fishing-rod boy sorta shtick. Also I really like the idea that he’s good at chemistry/science. Even if he’s not great at like, memorising formulas, he’s still good at…remembering how things work together? And he’s pretty clever, just practically clever, not theoretically clever. 

…Doesn’t stop him from doing shit like letting luffy water-ski on him tho.

C: Can they swim well?

Yeah!! He grew up watching over Lu, who was shit, so he got good at swimming. Also, it’s fun. After he gets his DF he doesn’t necessarily miss swimming as much as he misses floating. And he doesn’t forget that he can’t swim, moreso his first instinct is save sibling and it takes physical effort to hold himself back.  

E: How are they with children?

TERRIFIED. Oh I have so many thoughts of Ace around kids. Okay so like first of all, I’d like it known that he’s really really good with kids. Sometimes he’s a bit stupid with them (see: that one time he just kinda. Chucked a child tree-top height and then almost dropped them because he didn’t expect them to scream and flail in the air), but overall he is super good with kids. 

But this is matched by: he’s so fucking scared of fucking them up. And other people’s kids?? Where he’s the dorky older brother, the grinning supportive uncle, where he’s got clear rules and he Knows he doesn’t have to deal with them for more than an hour, where even if they cry there’s probably a parent on hand, or it’s not on him to be responsible for this tiny child– he’s fine with that, and it’s still a little nerve-wracking, but he can Deal, and he actually likes kids. He likes kids a lot. 

He could just thinks he could never have his own. The thought of having his own kids is fuckin’ scary. He doesn’t want to fuck them up, or hurt them, or abandon them, he’s not a good dad, he won’t ever be a good dad, like– this boy is so so afraid of having his own kids. He would love lovelovelove a child, love to be a dad like Whitebeard was to him, he would smother that child in his affection, he would be an amazing dad. But there is absolutely no way he would be comfortable having a kid. If his s/o mentioned it he’d probably shut down or get really panicky, or try and turn the conversation around into something else, like, a million potential ways to get out of having that convo. ‘Cause he’s really scared he’d hurt a kid like his dad hurt him. 

So he’s super awesome with kids and anyone who knows him well can see that he’d be an awesome dad and he’d really like his own kids but unless he was either a) completely blank-face thrown into it or b) had heaps of support from his S/O, he’d try and find the baby somewhere else to live, like with Whitebeard or Makino or someone he trusted. Because he doesn’t trust himself to be a good dad. 

S: How stealthy are they?

super stealth. he’s ninja man extraordinaire at sneaking into things.

But like. keeping things on the DL?? fuck no snickers. He found and read Koala’s diary once - (it was an accident, she’d tried to disguise it as info for the army bc most people don’t actually read reports snickers and Sabo was like Oh I haven’t Read This I Probably Should and by the time he was like wait this feels like a diary he was already about a month in) - and was So Bad at keeping his new knowledge secret that he gave up and ‘fessed to it. 

Conversely I also 100% see him as Best Lie Child but only bc nobody expects him to be able to lie. And he never sounds like he’s lying, he’s drawling and sarcastic and keeps close enough to the truth that unless you know what the truth actually is you’d never pick it up. And even then he may get you to question it. 

A: What are/were this character’s best subjects in school?

Writing. English, technically, but mainly writing; he’s good with his words, and it was basically the only subject that interested him. If he’s interested he’ll work at it. If it’s necessary, if he needs it, if he is the one who decides he needs it, he’ll pour himself into doing something until he’s amazing at it, and he decided he wanted to tell stories and so he did. Sabo is…one of those kinda frustrating people who, if they chose to be good at something, seems to just…automatically be good at it?? Especially if it’s cerebral. But there’s also a lot of time where he pours himself into getting better than just good, and he seems to have Lots of things he’s Really Amazing At that just come from him being clever and good at figuring stuff out. 

So. English. And probably PE.

B: Do they have any allergies?

….yes. I’ve just decided. mainly bc I have a cold and I want sabo to suffer now, too that he gets hay fever. It is the worst thing ever. He hATES it. And? The real kicker??? For a long while he didn’t realise he had it. As a child he grew up on the revo army base, which was desert and dust and yeah the dust would make him choke and grumble sometimes but it wasn’t pollen, and then his first few missions out were somehow not spring islands, and then he’s seventeen and snot is pouring out of his nose and he’s basically crying, his eyes are watering so bad, and he can’t breathe bc of all the freakin’ pollen in the air (flower festival + spring island = bad) and for a red hot second everybody thinks he’s been poisoned but one of the crew who’s with them is just like 

“oh. Allergies.” and gives him some medicine and tea and pulls out their stash of mint-smelling tissues so sabo can blow his nose.

Sabo, to this day, still claims he was poisoned (but he keeps antihistamines on him now, and double-checks missions that may lead to spring islands.) 

O: What would it take to break them, inside and out?

wow. sure, okay. 

Okay.

Well first of all Sabo is– yeah, really strong, he went through a Lot and he’s been….in a lot of bad situations, I feel?? And he still has the drive and power and commitment to keep going and keep fighting for the revolution. Losing Ace…really fucked him up, but I feel part of that was like, gaining back his best friend and brother in the exact same moment he lost him/didn’t know Luffy was alive. He had all of his bad memories and all of his good memories come back at the same time that he learned his Most Trusted Person died. S’not great. 

And I bring that up just bc I feel like…losing luffy (before the end of the series/the revolution was over) would fuck him up but I don’t think it’d break him. Like he’d be distraught and hurting but. You have to carry on. There is time for mourning later. There are people to save and wars to end and without anybody to stay alive for he’s vicious and brutal (but then again when was he not?)

I feel like. It’d be really hard to break Sabo when/if he still had the CauseTM. To quote lucky, “it’s the personal stuff that has the power to break him, but it’s the mission that keeps him going”, so you 100% have to figure out a way to tie both of them together and snap ‘em at the same time.

After the revolution was done? If the revolution was done and they lost - he’d still be going, still be fighting - but god forbid the revolution was done and they won. They won with losses, they won with blood, he’s missing the people he cared about, but he steps up to do his duty, to keep working, and then they tell him they don’t need him anymore. 

And Luffy didn’t last longer than Roger did, when he claimed the one piece, so Sabo doesn’t even have family left. He doesn’t have the cause he’d dedicated his life to, he doesn’t have his family, he tries to do good and keep fighting even without the Army at his side, but people are afraid of him, he keeps fucking stuff up, he tries to help but in the latter years the only thing he was good at was fighting, and he never- he never learnt how to take care of himself. That was Koala’s job, and Hack’s job, and Luffy’s job, to poke and prod him into letting himself be a person instead of a martyr, a revolutionary, and he doesn’t have them anymore.

I feel like, to break Sabo, you’d have to systematically strip him of the things that he feels provides worth. Strip him of his title as brother, strip him of the title of revolutionary, say there are no more causes to fight for, and watch him try and live in a world at peace.  

Alternatively, enough times in a no-win scenario would make him pretty jaded and cruel, and I don’t necessarily know if it’d break him unless it was….a thousand times in a no-win, and then you added something else, someone else important to him - Luffy, who comes in and has passion and makes him believe again, who fights to the last breath and then takes his last breath - and Sabo…almost expects Luffy to come back in the next loop but. He doesn’t. 

I feel like knowing finality would really fuck him up. 

[maribelsawyer]

- ̗̀ * ( ella purnell + cisfemale + she/her ) have you seen ( maribel sawyer ) walking around campus ? they are a ( nineteen ) year old, studying ( journalism ). we hear they are in ( delta gamma chi ), and can be ( benevolent & impressionable ), maybe it’s because they are a ( gemini ). they sort of remind us of ( scraped knees , magnifying glasses , vintage oxfords ), maybe we can find out more ! *  ̖́-  + newspaper writer

god okay looks like i’ve fallen in love w ella purnell and i want to b her. anyways maribel is my newest baby n im sorta making her up as i go so pls bare w me lmao

TW: eating disorder mentions, subtle abuse?

{she is not currently in that mindset ^}

gen. info

full name: maribel ottoline sawyer

nickname(s): mari, bell, lottie b/c middle name, etc. etc. just sawyer sometimes idk

b.o.d. - june 1st, 19 yrs old

label(s): the marionette, the demure, the prevaricator, etc. etc.

height: like 5′3″ prolly tbh

hometown: duluth, minnesota

sexuality: shit she don’t know

bio. info

her dad’s in the air force, her mom’s published three diet cookbooks and two different DVDs--maribel is the only middle child

one of those conservative, all american families, they were strict and definitely made it known that they were parents and not friends by any means

9pm curfew, not leaving the dining room until all ur food is gone, grounded if ur grades were below their expectations, etc. etc. 

her older sister can evoke emotions in others thru her acting like no other. has taken the hearts (and leads) of all her acting directors since childhood. her voice is broadway material.

and her older brother? has been the best linebacker on any high school team he’s joined; hopes to make it to the big leagues. but if he doesn’t? he’s been taking college-level classes since he was a sophomore.

and...maribel?

maribel is...just, maribel.

for the longest time, there was nothing special about maribel

she couldn’t sing, or dance, or compose words in pretty prose

her grades were only satisfactory after hrs n hrs of studying everyday

homegirl can’t even cook w/o smth exploding

in short, maribel has never been good at anything. can’t draw within the lines, can’t follow the line, opens her mouth at the wrong time. etc. etc. shit? rough.

ANYWAYS

her family moves around a lot b/c of her dad, so she’s never really been in one place long enough to really prove herself? always been the quiet girl in class while her siblings brought home gold stars everyday

the kinda girl others would sorta push around n bully a lil bit bc she would never know what to say; prolly just cried a lot tbh

grew up w a lot of insecurities b/c of this

definitely doesnt help that her mother is obsessed w beauty n fitness n like

their mother p much forced her lifestyle onto her children, mari has a rough relationship w food b/c of it

ANYWAYS part 2

grew up always in the shadows of her siblings and their accomplishments, and spent a lot of her time tryn find something to be good at just so somebody could give her a stamp of approval

was always the ~wannabe~, the girl who would just endlessly suck up to the most popular girl she could find and try to mimic her to the best of mari’s abilities, just so she could survive her school experience

by the time mari was a freshmen in high school, her parents had divorced and she finally thought she could have a normal school experience and make something for herself

obv not. her mother shipped her off to a boarding school in nevada and that was it; her sister had already graduated and her brother was still in middle school.

it was finally just mari.

of course like she tried to suck up to others but it wasn’t really helpful, everybody was a lil too boujie for her and she always froze up when she tried to speak to the ~popular kids~

they only rly spoke to her b/c she’s got this knack for forging shit, like i dont think she even has her own handwriting; she always copies other people’S b/c she’s just. so used to tryn to mimic others n be them as much as possible

around this time she found herself fucking around in her computer class more often than not; it’d been the only elective left b/c she arrived in the middle of the year

but she surprisingly enjoyed it, like, a lot

her parents never really allowed much computer use b/c like. rots ur brain or whatever.

got into programming, but when she found out that u could ? hack shit ? kinda peaked her interest.

her shift into programming to hacking was subtle but before she knew it, she was fucking around on websites for the fun of it. never anything severe

computers became her friends, y’know

that was until her sophomore year and there was another loser fucking around on the computers during lunchtime

and like...they just started kinda talking, y’know? became friends, prolly mari’s first legitimate friend in...forever, really

the kid was kinda weird but she didn’t mind b/c fuck, mari couldn’t be picky n she didn’t mind weird

like...they were obsessed w conspiracies n mysteries n shit

it started to rub off on mari too, b/c homegirl is an idiot but. an observant idiot.

so she started getting reeeally into mysteries and shit. started acting like a mini investigator w/ her pal; solving stupid things like ‘who wrote ‘mindy is a whore’ in the bathroom stall’ and ‘does mr. roberts have a secret obsession w kpop’

no mindy is not a whore it was slander

yes mr. roberts is into kpop

ANYWAYS part 3

so they were these nancy drew, scooby doo, veronica mars knock off duo

by junior yr her partner started getting into like. drinking and minor drugs and other things that the other boarding school kids were smuggling in, y’know. 

this meant that mari was getting into that shit too, y’know. cant stay innocent forever.

became a lil bit of a pothead lmao

so like now theyre just stoners who go around solving shit and prolly also stirring shit up for the hell of it

so like . . . . . one night they were doin’ their thing, right? and her partner brings up this...completely wild idea

they live in nevada. y’kno what else is in nevada?

area 51

these fucking idiots want to go break into this fucking. air force base. to find area 51.

guess what they did?

they attempted to break into the air force base. like. of course they tried.

they failed like, super miserably, got arrested for trespassing and had to be bailed out of the county jail by their parents

her dad almost lost his job so he was mcfuckin PISSED esp once they figured out she was high as shit

her partner? disappeared. nobody knows where they went.

mari was moved from the boarding school to a public school closer to where her mother could, begrudgingly, keep an eye on her

kinda spent the rest of her high school career p miserable, she gave up on her whole ~detective~ thing and resorted to making fake IDs for her fellow high schoolers

was drug-tested like every week or so, too

around this time her mental health and relationship w food got worse, she barely made it to graduation. took a gap year to recover, worked a buncha jobs but usually gets fired from them b/c she’s really fucking bad like most things besides her two (2) unconventional talents that are decidedly useless

came to ucla b/c her mother p much made her, her mother’s a legacy and that’s about the only reason why she got into delta gamma chi

doesn’t want ppl to know she was a loser and also like . fucked up her dad’s life a lil, b/c it was def a thing that made the news and the only reason why her name wasn’t in the articles was b/c she was a minor at the time

so she like...lies abt her childhood a lot

tells a lotta lil white lies b/c she just. doesn’t wanna b her

uuuhh wanted to do computer science bc she loves it but her parents were both like ‘lmao we’re not paying for shit if u do that’ bc they don’t think it’s very ~ladylike~ n they still want her to like. just be submissive and obedient n shit.

so she took up journalism b/c neither her parents think it’s like a real career and they just want her to find a husband n get married n settle down n stop being troublesome

fun fact: she has a scholarship for being lefthanded so that pays for Some of it esp b/c she’s an out of state student

still struggles a lil bit w food but she’s like. doing a lot better. goes to group therapy, probably

uuuh that’s it for now i think ??

OH SIKE !! she’s a writer for the newspaper and writes ADVICE columns on various topics b/c she’s good at offering advice but only when she can sit down n think abt it lmao

^^she goes by an alias b/c she just. doesnt want ppl to know its her idk she thinks its embarrassing

other than that she’s probably like ... doing campus tech support b/c that’s her current job but who knows how long that’ll last lmao

knowing her she’s going to accidentally switch into her phone sex voice (another, old job she doesn’t do anymore) n get fired for tryn seduce a man with ‘did u try turning it on and off again?’

OKAY i think that’s all lmao

personality

mari is just. awkward, man

i mean like...she’s sorta bad at talking to others a lot of the time??

like ppl r kinda like ‘how tf r u a delta gamma chi girl’ n she’s just like i mean u  h h h h 

prolly stutters a lil bit b/c she’s usually rly anxious

but she’s v v nice, like, she tries her hardest to be a good friend n everything

but she also kinda switches her personality to appeal to whoever she’s talking too ?? like she wants to be. likable. she’s not real w/ others v v often

if ur boujie yeah she’ll pretend to be boujie too

she prolly still sells fake IDs to high schoolers n some of her college peers, she has one herself n hasn’t gotten caught yet sooo

always fidgets like she can’t rly sit still often b/c she’s so nervous

is a lil bit of a stoner but i feel like u can’t ever tell tbh

a lil shy n hesitant at first i’d imagine, or maybe just always lmao

has a bit more of a personality once she sucks it up n gets closer to u but she’s always v v cautious abt befriending ppl just b/c she’s had a bad time w bullies n her one friend in life disappeared so like...bummer, y’kno?

can never say no. like, i dont think it’s in her vocabulary. she’s a yes gal.

will p much do anything u ask of her b/c she’s constantly seeking approval

can ramble a bit when she’s nervous which is always but she also apologizes like a lot.

squeaks like a mouse

present at parties but it’s always kinda like. who r u. n she has to remind everybody that she’s a sorority gal too

considers herself v v forgettable, like, just v unimportant

like she’s just rly insecure

still does computer shit n is still rly good at it but she hasn’t done anything srs w/ it so it’s just wasted potential

going to use her journalism degree to do investigative journalism and maybe escape her parents, eventually

she just. bends easily to other’s wills, y’know? she’s hashtag soft

even tho she’s like. shy n awkward n shit it doesn’t take a lot for her to like, laugh, or smile

like she tries rly hard to appear happy n an optimist n just like. unfettered

a lil plain jane we stan

i cant think of anything else but she’s. she’s a good kid

OH she’s rly good w numbers n math but like that’s abt it. she’s a whole dumbass on everything else sometimes

is bad w talking n giving advice like in person but like ?? in her column or ovr text or smth ? she’s good. she’s concise.

is a good team player/good w/ projects/etc. etc.

OH OKAY YEAH

she’s rly observant n b/c she’s a lil bit of a compulsive liar she can usually tell when ppl arent honest

depending on how close y’all r she’ll prolly crack down on ur bullshit

but she’s also timid so like who knows tbh

this isn’t a personality trait but she wears like medium hoop earrings all the time n it’s cute ok bye

OK OK LAST THING

she’s so. fucking. clumsy. she will bump into everything. she’ll bump into the air. fuck, she prolly falls over just standing straight. usually has bruises n scratches from just being a clumsy idiot

like she can b a lil ditzy y’know ?? doesn’t have much common sense, sometimes, n can b naive but idk it’s all rly dependent on her n who she’s w n just. how i end up playing her lmao

lovs vintage. is cute.

wanted connections

her roommate uwu

ppl she’s interacted w/ during her childhood !! she’s moved around a lot so like . . . . they could kno each other

mmm sorority sisters

um gimme a ride or die or like a best friend or smth PLS she needs more friends

just more friends in general. she’s awkward but she needs ‘em

?? a one night stand ?? she’s not really . . . known for hooking up w/ ppl but i think an accidental occurrence would b fun!

idk somebody for her to just. crush on from afar. prolly stutters whenever they come near or talk to her or smth

^^i mean like an unrequited crush

SOMEBODY USE HER ! RUIN HER !

FRIENDS OR FUCKING OR WHATEVER

fake friends too! use her for her ~kewl skillz~

bad influence

let her b a good influence

some kinda...skinny love idk what that means. a will they wont they. smth cute. smth pure

it’d be wild if her partner just popped up outta the blue like that b/c mari 100% thinks they were like killed by the government

ppl she gets high w n talk abt conspiracies w/ tbh

ppl she gives or has given advice to w her column pieces ! love it

idk partners in a class

enemies or smth. i want conflict.

a tutor for her dumbass

but also anybody who needs help in math? she can tutor u

idk like this we can work a lil smth smth out

i give u one penny, if u plot w me. pls. i am poor.

[shitthehousessay]

 Alright, it took a day (albeit I haven't really had much of a chance to work on it), but it's finally done. Here's my responses to the 102 questions^^. I probably put too much personal info on this site lol.

I’m doing this on my laptop because of how long it is, but answers are under the cut. Hope you enjoy random tidbits about me!

--Zero (the [other] Ravenclaw)

1. What is their full name?

While I usually use and prefer Zero Ace as an online name, my irl name is Solomon.

2. Zodiac sign

Pisces

3. In detail describe how they look

I'm 5'10" with a build like Shaggy Rodgers. I'm about,,,, less than 120lbs (that's a guess really, it's probably way less or slightly more.). You ever see a cloud? Yeah, imagine one as black wavy/curly hair with red tips (natural, not dyed) that goes to about the bottom of my neck. Brown eyes, half philipino (no, I don't know any of the language), decent moustache, and I've been told by various people that they thought I was a stoner when they first met me.

4. How old are they?

I am 16

5. What clothes to they like to wear?

I don't really have any kind of set style either. I usually just go with whatever's comfy for me.

6. What’s their favorite piece of clothing?

I've got this really soft brown fake leather jacket that my dad got me about two or three years ago that I used to wear consistently, but I'm not sure if I have a 'favorite'.

7. Any piercings?

Nope

8. Do they have any other jewelry they wear?

I wear a Timex Ironman analogue watch that I got at Walmart a few years ago ('twas on sale) and a ring with a part that spins in the middle that I bought in like sixth grade at the Newseum in DC.

9. Any tattoos?

Nah

10. How old are they?

See above

11. What do they smell like?

Idk, disappointment probably

12. What are their four trinkets?

(I'm gonna do stuff on my school backpack for this one) -- I've got a Ministry of Magic keychain, a Pokeball keychain, a Spiderman keychain, and a Ravenclaw house emblem pin.

13. GOVERNMENT MANDATED FERSONA

Roomba with a knife taped to it

14. What kind of magic are they good at?

Accidental Procrastination, aka Time Travel

15. What kind of magic are they bad at?

Luck

16. Of the four, six or seven magical elements which are they most connected to? Four: fire,air water earth. six: fire,air,water, wood,earth, metal. Seven:fire, air, water, wood, earth, metal, aither.

Not sure if this is asking about choosing a single element or a group, so I'm gonna go with water.

17. What does their gateway look like prior to their memory loss? What does it look like afterwards?

(I'm not sure what this is asking)

18. Do they have a familiar? If they do. What type of animal is it? What is it’s name? Is it still around after they lost their memory?

I have an old yellow cat named Iris and he's pretty cool. We share birthdays and he's one year older than me.

19. Have they ever cursed someone?

I have tried and I will continue to try.

20. How do they handle those headaches/migraines?

I sometimes put headphones in and listen to ambience after taking some medicine, but on some of my bad days I just wait for them to pass, even when it takes a few hours.

21. What tarot card do they connect the most with?

I'm gonna be honest: I know next to nothing about tarot cards.

22. Where were they born?

Tennessee

23. What is their favorite color?

Like a light blue or teal. Specifically though? #41A9B8

24. What is their least favorite color?

This is a tough one. I'm gonna go with like a rusty brown

25. Are they right handed, left handed or ambidextrous?

Right handed

26. What were they like as a child?

This would take a while, but I was a little shit, imo. (Also, kinda hard for me to remember specifically rn)

27. What were their parents like?

My dad's okay, he's not the best but he's doing great. My mom? Well, let's just say my opinion of her has always been pretty decent of her up until around when 2018 started.

28. Do they have any siblings? If the answer is yes how many?

Yes, I have three half brothers, two on my mom's side (who I wish would die) and one on my dad's side.

29. Do they have any other relatives they are close with?

I've got a lot of aunts (dad's side) that I consider myself close with, along with a few cousins. There's also my Grandma and Grandpa (dad's side) that I love a lot. I also have a nephew who's about I wanna say 5 or 6 years old who's a blast to hang out with.

30. What are they afraid of?

Spiders kinda scare me. And a few things associated with low self-esteem that I don't want to mention here.

31. What do they identify as?

I am a Demi-Pansexual dude

32. Do they have any allergies?

None that I know of

33. Do they have any other medical problems?

I can't think of any specifics right now

34. What about mental health issues?

Depression and Anxiety both are self-diagnosed though. I'm waiting until after highschool, or until the age where I can legally keep things like those to myself without having to tell my parents, before I go to get them diagnosed

35. What’s that personal hygiene regimen like?

Showers at least once a day, twice if possible. Remember to try to brush your teeth, too.

36. Favorite rock or gemstone?

Amythest because it's my birthstone

37. Favorite tree?

Redwoods are pretty cool

38. Favorite type of weather?

Not too hot, not too cold and sunny and cloudless or overcast and rainy, depending on mood

39. Least favorite type of weather?

The type of cloudless hot day that just saps your energy away like nothing else

40. What is their favorite season? (remember winter is summer and spring is fall)

Winter

41. How many languages could they speak before the memory loss? How many do they currently speak?

English and very broken French

42. Do they sing or play any instruments?

I sing from time to time (albeit not very good) and I have an ocarina that I really want to take time and learn

43. What do they tend to joke about?

Self-deprecation is my go-to, then there's vine humor and some standup, then just nonsense humor (See: bORGER)

44. After a stressful day how do they relax?

Nap a bit, then some music and/or video games

45. Guilty pleasures?

Idk, I can't think of any. Sonic ‘06, maybe is the closest thing that I have to one.

46. idiosyncrasies?

I guess you could list a lot of the usual ADHD stimming methods. I also adjust my glasses from the side sometimes whenever I’m nervous/anxious or when I want to appear confident. Adjusting my watch on my wrist is also something that I do a lot. I know I have a lot more, but :/

47. How do they act when they first meet someone new? How quickly do they warm up to them?

I can be kinda timid and quiet. I usually try to listen in on conversations involving that person/people to try to find somethings that I can remember and use for initiating conversations, especially if it’s with stuff that I know a bit about. It usually takes two or three semi-long times amd well interactions spent with me for me to start being comfortable around other people. I don't warm up too quickly, unless if you can get through my barriers pretty well

48. In what order would they prioritize Love, fame, money, power, and knowledge?

Love, knowledge, money, power, fame

49. List four or more things they love to do

Draw, read, talk with internet friends, play video games, browse the internet

50. List four or more things they hate to do

doing boring and uninteresting school work, being an unnecessary nuisance, hearing about family drama, engaging in school drama

51. List five or more things they have said that sum up who they are

"I'm laughing my ass off rn because the program the state is using for EOC testing was apparently hacked so we aren't testing today, but when my class heard it almost everyone started looking at me and saying I did it." [...] "Meanwhile: I nearly tripped over my backpack"

"Oh good, we get to make memes of stuff in the Louvre for extra credit. Looks like my grade is about to rise drastically."

"I’m gonna go provoke this cult so I can get asks in my inbox"

“I stole this haircut from a lion”

"I have many problems"

52. How do they react to (both verbal and physical) conflict?

I'm a pacifist so I try to stay out of situations like that (They bring up too many negative memories and emotions for me)

53. What kind of bad habits to they have?

I have a lot of trouble with a perfectionist mentality. It gets me into a lot of sticky situations

54. What kind of character faults do they have?

What even is self-esteem/ self-worth/ self-love????? To me, my needs come last. Self-doubt out the wazoooooo. Tons of unresolved shit. That's barely even scratching the surface.

55. What’s their best trait in their opinion?

I try to have a lot of empathy for people and I want to make people happy, even if I’m not happy.

56. What do they think of their appearance?

I like mine, at least a bit.

57. How do they interact with people in a position of authority?

Honestly, it just depends on the person. If the person in question is a dick, you better believe I’m not going to react well to their face.

58. Who did they look upto as a kid?

Mostly like video game characters from games that I played.

59. How do they interact with kids?

I like kids pretty well.

60. Do they want kids of their own someday?

I don't know. I don't think I'm at a point in my life where I can answer that right now.

61. Are they religious? If so what god/goddess or gods/goddesses do they worship?

I'm agnostic

62. What do they think the meaning of life is?

Idk... Maybe... Self-discovery, in a way.

63. What would they want their last words to be?

There are three roads. Maybe omething meaningful, like "Thank you," maybe something vague and prophetic like, "You won't have to wait much longer," or maybe, just maybe, something like, "I'll be back bitches!!!"

64. What do they want to do before they die?

I want to make at least one game and book that people enjoy and that I will be satisfied with

65. What/how do they want to be remembered for after they die?

I would like to be remembered fondly by people who knew me.

66. How do they express affection?

I'm usually very asocial, so if I make an active effort to maintain communication with someone, then they usually mean something to me. I also send memes and stuff. Also, I try to open up a little more around people that I trust

67. What do they normally eat for breakfast?

It usually just depends on how much time I have in the morning. Can range from poptarts to a slice of toast between two pieces of bread to leftover pizza

68. Do they like spicy food?

Yeah

69. Favorite fruit and or vegetable?

Favorite fruit is probably mandarin oranges and my favorite vegetable is probably carrots

70. Do they like sweets?

On occasion

71. Do they drink alcohol? If they do, what do they act like when their drunk?

Nope, but probably like a damn fool

72. How do they take their tea/coffee?

I like sweet ice tea or maybe some herbal tea with a small bit of sugar or honey. As for coffee, I don't usually drink it, but I can drink it pure black or french vanilla

73. What food would they refuse to eat?

Most things that have a weird texture and/or smell

74. Is there anything they eat that most people would find unappealing?

You ever drink just straight sauces? Like A1 steak sauce or barbecue sauce? Yeah....

75. When going on the road what food could they not live without?

I need me some original ritz

76. What meal gives them a sense of nostalgia?

Not sure about nostalgia, but my school sells fresh-made chocolate chip cookies during lunch on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays and I get them a lot when I'm having bad days

77. What do they do when no one’s around?

I sometimes sing and maybe hop around, but I usually just do stuff that I do when people are around (like browse tumblr)

78. How would they react if a prized possession got stolen?

Cry, feel numb, or go ballistic. There is no in-between.

79. What’s the first thing they would buy if they won the lottery?

A better computer, that's for sure

80. What would their favorite modern invention be?

The Nintendo Switch!!

81. In a new unfamiliar place what do they do?

Observe the surroundings from the sidelines before doing anything

82. Someone just threatened them what do they do?

It depends on the situation, but I either brush it off or I take precautionary measures (like a protective order if my life is being threatened)

83. A rather well rich looking woman just dropped her purse and didn’t notice. What do they do?

I might try to give it back.... after I check her wallet and get some cash as an award...

84. What’s the worst thing someone has said to them?

The one that sticks out the most is probably the time when one of my older half-brothers was yelling at me and said that if I ever wonder why people say that I act like a school shooter it's because I act like one most of the time (all this stemmed because I was frustrated over a book recommendation not posting and instead of letting me silently cool down, my mom and brother kept on talking crap about me and I decided to say "Just shut up for a few minutes").

Oh, but there’s also the time when I went with my dad to the divorce case’s hearing to testify against my mom and my brothers and the judge looked at me and said “You’re 16, right? In two  years, you’ll be 18. When I was 18 I was heading to war. So, if you’re gonna cry, go do it somewhere else because I don’t want anyone coming up here and being a crybaby in my courtroom.” That fucking stunned me when he said it.

 85. What is the strangest thing they’ve ever come across?

"can i hear your belly" has to be the weirdest and most unsettling direct message that I have ever gotten from someone who isn't a bot and it haunts me to this day

86. Someone just stole food from them what do they do?

I don't usually eat a lot, so if someone takes food from me I don't really care.

87. They meet a man at a crossroads. The man says they can have everything they’ve ever wanted. What happens next?

I would check to see if there was anything I want to make sure that my family and friends and people who are close to me that haven’t experienced mental illnesses like depression or anxiety to never develop any mental illnesses as long as they live, before anything.

88. As a child what would they say they wanted to be as an adult? ie. When I grow up I’m going to _______

My dream has always been and continues to be to become a successful video game developer and/or producer. I want to help create worlds to escape to when the real world becomes a bit too overbearing.

89. What’s their D&D alignment?

I consider myself a neutral good

90. What is the stupidest thing they’ve ever done?

Oof, that's a long list. Probably entering the crawlspace under my Grandma's house too fast and getting a part of my lower back pretty bad. Boy, did it leave a pretty big scar.

91. Have they ever got in trouble with the law or been arrested?

Nope

92. Do they know how to win a fight?

I like to think so. I'm not going to not play dirty if I feel like I'm in danger. Also try to use the environment to your advantage if possible.

93. Are they good at hand to hand combat?

I dunno. I doubt it, but I haven't really tried.

94. Have they ever stolen something?

I have, but really only minor things and only from people that I hate

95. Have they ever killed someone?

Not yet, :p

96. What/who do they find disgusting?

I can't look at stuff or pictures like decaying stuff (like dead stuff) without gagging

97. What upsets them the most?

Conflict mostly. The thought that I'm bothering people also does it. And I feel odd, to say the least about physical contact.

98. What anime character would they be?

I feel like maybe Fafnir (Miss Kobayashi's Dragon Maid) or either Shinra or Mikado (Durarara!) could fit me.

99. What disney character would they be?

I didn't really know about this one, so I asked a few of my friends and one of them [the one who actually answered my question with an actual Disney character] said that I remind them of Sora from Kingdom Hearts, on the grounds that I've "got a good heart" and I'm "always confused". It was the nicest thing I've heard all week^^

100. What monster would they be?

Knife-wielding tentacle

101. What mythological figure would they be?

Tbh, I don't know enough mythology off the top of my head to answer this question.

102. List three songs that you associate with them.

Hmm.... this one is very tough for me because there are different songs that define different points in my life... As for songs that kinda aren’t bound by specific points in my life, even if I haven’t known these songs all my life, I'm thinking that these could fit the best here:

ECHO (feat. GUMI) by Crusher-P

Simple Life by Fox Stevenson

Canonball (Mythos Remix) from Megaman Zero 3

Anyway, I hope you now know a little more about me now. Do what you will with the information, I guess  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . It’s really late for me and I’m really tired so I may go ahead and get some sleep for tonight. Have a good one everyone^^ !

[crystalelemental]

FE Fates Replay - Part 3

When we left off, we were ready to make the decision between the Hoshidans, and the Nohrians.  On one side, our peaceful blood relatives, who have finally been reunited with you after all these years.  On the other, the people you’ve grown up with, who serve a mad king that seeks only to subjugate other nations.  Now...we must choose...

The decision between the two is interesting.  Based on the Nohrian events at the outset, we’ve been given a glimpse of what the kingdom is like on the inside, and then we’re shown how brutal their tactics can be once we join the Hoshidans.  The Hoshidan segments prepare us for the inevitability of the choice, and frame things as a matter of which family you are siding with.  That’s an important distinction.  It’s not a matter of your ideals.  Those are never in question.  Regardless of whose side you’ve been on, Corrin remains true: she seeks to protect people, and create a peaceful end for both sides.  The question is, which family do you belong with?

The Hoshidans seem convinced that you are meant to be with them, by virtue of blood.  But really, what is family anyway?  Yes, they are your “true” family, for whatever value that has.  But what have they done as your family?  Mostly, they’ve just tried to assure you that, although you’ve been raised in Nohr, you are one of them.  Hinoka has a pure display of emotion toward Corrin, but beyond that, they offer almost nothing else.  Compare that with the Nohrian siblings.  Xander, your older brother, who helped you train, day after day, so that one day you could leave the tower you were kept in.  Leo, risked his own head defying your father, just to help you hold to your ideals.  Elise, who visited you every day and kept you company in your imprisonment.  Camilla, who looks out for you and the other siblings.  Though the few chapters we had with them, we’ve seen how devoted they are to you, and the bonds you share.  Comparatively, the Hoshidans offer nothing other than “the truth,” that you are part of their family.  There are no bonds, and Corrin herself remarks on how she feels nothing toward these siblings outright.  Though your blood relation is there, your bonds are in Nohr.  The reason to side with Hoshido is your ideals, the path that fights directly for peace, and doesn’t involve dealing with Garon at all.  But the game has insisted that the choice should be based on which family you belong with, and that being the case, the choice should be obvious.  We side with Nohr.

“But what about the true route?”  Shhh!  Later, okay?

When you pick Nohr, it politely informs you that you won’t be getting extra experience or gold.  That’s funny, because I have the DLC, so I assure you I will not go without.  “I thought you wanted to maintain the difficulty of the game?”  Yeah?  I’m not gonna power level, but I want my money.

Anyway, the Hoshidans are devastated, and Ryoma goes on a lot about how it was your destiny to be on their side, and the Nohrians must have brainwashed you or some shit.  This is honestly the point where we should just turn around and leave, but instead, the Nohrians are insistent on fighting.  If they leave, the Hoshidans might think they’re scared, or worse, might think that Nohr coerced you into joining them.  No, we have to fight to show them that Corrin picked them over the Hoshidan siblings!  ...guys.  Guys, this is really petty.  Like...really petty.  I’m starting to have second thoughts.

I will note that, if Corrin fights with certain siblings in this map, you get a bit of extra dialogue.  I didn’t get Hinoka’s dialogue with Corrin, but Takumi’s is mostly him being like “I knew you’d betray us.”  Yeah, I guess even Takumi saw how boring his family was and knew I’d go back to the cool kid’s club.  That said, your dialogue with Sakura is fucked up, man.  Sakura can’t even fight, you run up to her and she’s like “Corrin, are you really going to fight me?”  And Corrin just goes “No, I just...need you to take a long nap...”  I know you mean knocking her unconscious, but damn, that’s harsh.

After the conflict, Azura tells you that your choice can’t be undone, but you’re sure to see each other again.  Jakob arrives and tells you he’s been looking for you.  You also run into Lilith.  Jakob’s confusion here is great.  Anyway, this brings us into My Castle for the first real time, and we can start setting up.  You know what that means!  The entire rest of this is going to be me VIOLENTLY COMPLAINING about My Castle!

Fuck this goddamn shitheap.  I hate it.  I think half the detriment to gameplay is right here, in this fucking place.  Let’s start with the worst: artificial resource collection.  There are 12 resources and 10 kinds of food.  Resources are used to upgrade your weapons, with different weapons needing different types of stones.  The stones, I believe, are separated into 6 for Nohr, 6 for Hoshido.  You need a veritable assload of resources to forge one weapon, and the level you can forge is pretty low.  You also need copies of said weapon at the same level, in order to forge up.  So you may be wondering, if I’m playing Nohr, and money is tight...how do I get the resources for this?  Short answer: you don’t.  Forging is so goddamned expensive you can’t realistically do it without the DLC.  More importantly, you only get one unit of resource from your own castle, and only of one type.  To get others, you need to go to other castles with wireless features, and do all that.  Then, you can also get bonuses for how often you visit or battle the other castles.  Oh, and the cap is 9999.  So...good luck with that, I guess.

“Wait, battle?” you ask.  Yes, you can battle other players in their castle!  Finally, Fire Emblem has PvP!  ...kinda?  The other team is AI controlled, so it’s not proper PvP, but they’re trying, I guess.  Anyway, what’s really funny is no one really does that.  PvP in this kind of game is stupid.  Why?  Because when you win, you can buy a skill from your opponent at a discounted rate, if you have the same character!  So, remember having to choose an alternate class for Corrin at the start of the game?  Let’s take my choice, Samurai.  Samurai can learn Vantage.  However, by choosing this path, I locked myself out of, say, Knight class, so I can’t get Pavise.  I can rectify this by going to the castle of someone who did pick Knight, and learn their Pavise skill by beating their castle, and they in turn could get Vantage by beating my team.  Now, put on your thinking caps, kids.  What is most valuable for everyone: setting up a proper fighting team, or setting up your units to be far away from the Seize point and letting them just run up to capture it?  The second, obviously.  They get skills, you get more visits from people who want things from you, and everything is great.  If you actually defend your castle?  You’re an asshole, and are what’s wrong with society.  Now this also creates other issues.  Marriage options in this game allow you to reclass to the classes of the person you married as well.  This means that, in essence, you can get every possible skills on any unit, depending on your pairing choices.  So finding people who chose differently is imperitive.  But there’s no way to find people who chose differently with any sort of reliability, so you’re sunk.

Now, the flipside there is that Awakening didn’t have this.  You had the classes and skills that were inherent to you, and nothing else.  I do like the idea of better balancing the kids and adults by expanding what the adults can learn, but the problem is that this whole process is tedious.  The only way to find those other skills is to locate someone online who is sharing their information, hasn’t updated their castle since sharing that information, and is apparently in the same country as you.  But more importantly?  Half the enjoyment of this kind of system is that units don’t play the same.  But now...they kinda do.  Anyone can be anything, but certain skills are definitely better than others.  There are certain combinations, but mostly you keep to a few tried and true configurations and don’t deviate.  So when you randomly go to castles hoping maybe someone will have Nyx with something unique, they tend to all have the same characters (lords or kids), and generally have the same skills throughout.

That said, there is one hysterical outcome of this, and that’s hacking.  Apparently, they didn’t think it would happen to them, or just weren’t prepared, but people immediately found a way to hack Aptitude onto every character in existence, and it spread like wildfire through this system.  So in a way, for anyone who is anti-hacking (which should be no one, but I know better), this system allowed everyone to be a cheater!  Even when you didn’t directly cheat, you still have cheats on!  Hell, even Hoshidan Unity is floating around all over, and I’m pretty sure that was an exclusive skill too!  Anything can be anywhere thanks to hacking, and this unnecessary system!

Then we have the Dragon Points, which you need to upgrade facilities.  You only get them from clearing maps and visiting other castles.  It’s another slow resource you need a lot of, because eventually you get statues of your units that, when created, increase their specific boon stat by up to 3 points for everyone who is well-supported with them.  So have fun farming dragon points out too!  Technically, you can do a bunch of these things at once, but it’s astonishing how, in a game all about quickly going from map to map and figuring out the strategy, their best idea for a central hub was a location that required you to stop actually playing the game for hours to farm materials.  Brilliantly done.

And this doesn’t even get into the controversial areas.  Prison is one, where you can capture enemy units and convert them to your side through...apparently torture?  I’ve heard that some lines suggest rape as torture, but I don’t know that for sure and I am so not willing to find out.  I don’t think Prison is actually necessary to improve, so I won’t even be building it.  Oh, right, fun facts: you need to upgrade some of these facilities to their max to recruit specific characters.  Flora won’t join you unless you have Fire Orb at rank 3, for some fucking reason.  I’m all for hidden characters, but that’s just obtuse.

The other is the most notorious one: the face-rubbing minigame.  I...god, what the hell were they thinking with this?  Guys, it was only cute in Pokemon because you want to give your little pupper Growlithe head pets.  They’re animals, and you’re petting animals, as is good and proper.  But these are humans, and you’re inviting them into your bedroom to stroke their face.  The US version got rid of it for your general cast, and only allows it for your wife/husband choice, but that’s...really not any better.  At all.  This mechanic never should’ve been in the game in the first place.  It’s creepy and uncomfortable, and I hate knowing it’s there.

I’m sure there will be other things for me to complain about, but for now, that’s all that immediately comes to mind.  The short of it is, I hate My Castle.  It was a terrible idea that does nothing but stall out gameplay for far too long, and completely invalidated the concept of making people choose a sub-class in the first place.  Half the fun should’ve been working with the pairings to get the shared skills to work in some combination, and instead you just play My Castle until you have the access to things.  Which costs money, so good luck with that.  I know, I know.  I can always play without those elements.  But the fact that they exist at all, and that I need tremendous amounts of resources just to forge weapons or upgrade the facilities here, means I may as well get skills while I’m doing it.  “Why don’t you just not forge weapons and use the stronger ones as the game progresses naturally?”  Ooohoho, friend.  Buddy.  Listen.  That’s another shout-fest for another day.  Safe to say, there’s a damned good reason you can’t just do that.

Ugh, this is making me irritable.  I think I’m gonna sit the rest of the evening out on this one.  If I’m gonna be fair to the game, I can’t be this riled while playing, so next part tomorrow, because tomorrow is, thankfully, a holiday.

[ruinouss-archived]

Dossier

Disclaimer: This contains the basics that mainly center around a more modern world. Any verse specifics can be found under her VERSES page.

The backstory TL;DR of her bio is at the bottom. Backstory tws: child/domestic abuse mention, alcohol, drugs, and death.

Mini Ref  - Other Visuals - Tattoo and Scar Guide (coming soon)

General

Name: Faye Rivera

Nicknames: Red, that bitch

Race: Human (most verses)

Age: 28

Gender: Cis-Female

Orientation: Demiromantic pansexual

DoB: May 3rd

Occupation: Gun for hire

Appearance

Height: 5'3"

Body Type: Hourglass

Skin Tone: Tanned

Hair: Reddish Brown

Eyes: Heterochromia blue (left) & brown (right)

Notable features: Freckles over bridge of nose, beauty mark on left jaw, notch in right ear, scar across right side of neck, and small ones scattered over body

Modifications: Three piercings in right ear, five piercings in left ear, behind left ear, and on her left hip/thigh.

Face Claim: Adria Arjona

Personal

Skills: Expert hand to hand combat, expert marksmanship, expert swordsmanship, first aid, cooking, minor mechanical knowledge, minor hacking knowledge

Weapons: Dual swords/daggers, hidden blades, retractable bo-staff, dual pistols, various other weapons depending on the job

Likes: Cooking/eating, drawing/painting, danger, drinking, the ocean, music (listening and playing)

Dislikes: Authority, failing, spiders (borderline phobia), being alone, losing her temper

Fears: Blackout darkness, claustrophobia

Family: Fiona Rivera (mother), Ryder Rivera (older brother), Cesar Steele (father), Joseph Duvall (Mentor/adoptive father)

Personality: Upon first impression Faye comes off as a cocky, audacious smartass with a death wish. She lives life to the fullest and tends to be rather reckless in some of her actions. But don’t let this fool you, she’s very calculating in her risks and has at least two back up plans already in the works. She’s slow to trust and can come off as a bit callous in some of her mannerisms and responses and her chaotic neutral disposition can prove unfavorable if a higher bidder comes along. It’s a cruel world and she’s learned the hard way to do the double cross first. She’s constantly looking for the next job/adventure and can find the silver lining in even the most bleak of situations.     Her mouth tends to operate faster than her mind which often gets her into some sticky situations but she’s learned to adapt and roll with the punches. Literally and figuratively. If one manages to tolerate her and stick around long enough to gain her trust they’ll earn themselves a friend who’ll gladly trade her life for theirs. They’ll also learn there’s more to her than meets the eye. And as a final warning, be mindful as she has a nasty temper that can get the best of her in the blink of an eye.

Bio:     Ever since she was born, life was difficult to put it simply. Her father, Cesar, was a cruel man who took over a criminal empire at a young age. Her mother was forced to be his property in exchange for her sister’s life. He found his men to have too many morals and decided to treat his two children as experiments, forcing them to commit heinous acts at a young age and severely and inhumanely punishing them when they disobeyed. Faye got the worst of it as her she got his tenacious and rebellious spirit. Her mother did what she could to protect her children, attempting many times to escape with her children. Each failed escape ended with a worse punishment that only fueled a fire and hatred for the man. It wasn’t until she was around eight and her brother was eleven that they finally got their chance to escape.     A highly trained mercenary had been hired to infiltrate Cesar’s domain and gather what intel he could. Upon discovering the family, he decided to assist them in escaping, believing Faye’s mother, Fiona, would be able to divulge valuable information. It was an escape as Cesar always seemed to be a step ahead. They managed to escape the compound but didn’t get very far before Cesar had tracked them down. The mercenary, Joseph, was badly injured during the firefight, leaving the three basically defenseless. In a last ditch effort, Fiona gave her life to save her children. Faye and her brother took to the woods, using their smaller size to their advantage as night fell. Assuming they’d succumb to the elements, Cesar gave up the chase and returned to his base of operations.     The pair waited for hours before finally moving, knowing there was nothing else but to look forward. Eventually they came across train tracks and followed it to a city where they survived in the slums by stealing and taking advantage of anyone that crossed their path. Over a year passed before their luck took a curious turn. Faye was attempting to pickpocket a stranger when they managed to catch her by her wrist. To both their surprise it turned out to be the same mercenary who had rescued her and her brother. He had survived his injuries that fateful night and spent days searching for them before ending up in the city. He decided to offer her a deal; he would adopt her and her brother but they’d have to follow his every command or they could remain on the streets where eventually their luck would run out. At the thought of becoming mercenaries themselves and avenging their mother, they agreed.     The following years were exhausting and difficult as they went through rigorous training to prepare themselves for the cruelty of the world while also having to balance school work. When their vindictive intentions came to light, Joseph confronted them with him and Ryder having a huge falling out who refused to bow down. A fight ensued but Joseph was quick to put Ryder back into his place, showing their was still much the eighteen year old could learn. This only upset Ryder who took off, leaving Faye to train alone. Despite the pain she felt from her brother’s abrupt disappearance she remained with Joseph, continuing to learn the trade and feeling the first sting of betrayal. They had been on a mission when one of their comrades double crossed them for a large cut. While they managed to complete the mission, Joseph suffered injuries that required him to retire.     Faye continued on and when she was twenty-one fell in love with a man named Ethan who showed her an even more lucrative world dealing in the underworld. She ignored her father’s warnings and pleas to not go down that path, running off with Ethan who manipulated into doing just about anything. A few years went by before she was ultimately betrayed by Ethan who attempted to kill her, slicing her neck and setting the building they were in on file. Miraculously, Faye managed to survive and pull herself out where she was able to get medical help in the nick of time. Her father came to visit where they reconciled. However, it was a short lived reunion as Ethan had heard of Faye’s survival and sent some men to dispose of her. Joseph was killed protecting his daughter. Grief stricken, Faye gave in to her rage and spent the next several months tracking Ethan and anyone associated with him down before brutally killing them.     Unable to properly cope with her grief and pain, she dissociated, becoming a living weapon. She reached out to contacts in the underworld, taking damn near every job offered to her no matter how gruesome or cruel the specifics might’ve been. She turned to alcohol and drugs to help dull her senses. This continued for about a year until her brother managed to track her down. It was a rough month as he forced her to detox and face what had happened and what she’d been doing the past year before finally bringing her back to normal. He helped her grieve and the two caught up where she learned he had in fact killed their father and took over the criminal empire, changing things so it was mainly just guns and drugs they dealt with. He’d always kept an eye on her but it wasn’t until she really went off the rails that he decided to step in.     Ryder remained with Faye, accompanying her on a few missions and showing her a few of his contacts that assisted in more training and fine tuning her abilities. He stayed until he was certain she wouldn’t slip back into a dark place. The two remained in contact and Faye continued working as a gun for hire with jobs ranging from being a body guard to contract killer. She remained rather neutral with the jobs she took, only stating killing animals and most children were off the table. Old habits died hard and she found herself finding some comfort in alcohol on the lonely nights.     TL;DR: Father was a crime lord and murdered her mother in front of her and her brother as they were trying to escape. The siblings lived on the streets for a year before a mercenary took them in. She trained with him even after her adoptive father and brother had a falling out and her brother left. She eventually ran off with some guy who manipulated her and introduced her to the underworld before eventually betraying her. She managed to survive and reconciled with her father right before her ex’s men tried killing her and instead ended up killing her adoptive father. This sent her in a rage where she hunted down her ex and his associates.     After successfully killing them, she was unable to cope with the guilt that came with her father’s death. She cut herself off from her emotions and started taking just about any job even if it meant killing innocent. This continued until her brother decided to step in and try and get her back on the right track. When he managed to break through they caught up and she learned he’d killed their father and had taken over the criminal business with some changes. They remained in touch and eventually Faye started working as a gun for hire again, taking jobs that ranged from being a body guard to a contract killer with a slightly better moral compass than before.

Extras

Knows a few different languages

Claustrophobia and fear of darkness stems from being locked in a footlocker/closet/cellar as punishment from her father

Usually always has snacks on her

Sometimes gives people nicknames

Has used the pseudo name Sharon Peters (say it fast)

Has safe houses scattered all over

[cntcrtainmcnt-blog]

lmao never trust my words when i say no more muses. so anyway, under the cut are brief intros.

ABIGAIL MACQUEEN looks an awful lot like VICTORIA JUSTICE. SHE is TWENTY-THREE and while they’re DETERMINED, they have a tendency to get pretty PASSIVE. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to SOLITAIRE by MARINA&THE DIAMONDS.

so i can definitely see how she resembles victoria’s character on eye candy. i actually created that muse before and then when the show came out, i modified it to look similar.

Older of two, she’s always been very energetic and outgoing. And very very damn good with computers.

When she was 16, her younger sibling went missing, and she started developing her hacking skills to try and track her online activity to find her.

But she never did, at least no in time, since they found the body of her younger sister washed up on some shore on the East Coast two months later. 

She decided to not let it stop her, and decided to use her skills to actually help others who might need it. So she opened some sort of underground business, and gets paid to hack for people(as long as it’s not like... government, or the person isn’t meaning any harm by it).

Buuuuuut she got caught, although they gave her some kind of second chance. She’d be free, as long as she decided to use her hacking skills to help cyber crimes rather than doing illegal jobs. So now she’s a hacker for cyber crimes in Kola(which is where she grew up btw).

ARINA KOLOSOVA looks an awful lot like NATALIE DORMER. SHE is THIRTY-TWO and while they’re SUAVE, they have a tendency to get pretty VINDICTIVE. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to YOU DON’T OWN ME by DUSTY SPRINGFIELD. 

Born and raised in Moscow, both her parents worked for an underground agency, think something similar to Kingsman, but with a Black Widow twist.

While her childhood was fine, when she became older, her parents started training her to become the perfect agent.

They became harsher on her, often depriving her of a real meal or even bed sheets at night when she wasn’t doing good in her training.

It was becoming a lot to deal with, but she knew better than to go against her parents. So she just tried harder and harder in trainings until they judged she was old and skilled enough to pass the entrance test for the agency.

Which she did, she aced it. While Arina never really thought about doing the same job her parents did, she did have a job now, at 21, so why give it up?

But it was underground, not very legal, and so they got busted when she was 24. She wasn’t there when they showed at the HQ, but her mother was, and she destroyed all files linking to Arina before the authorities saw them.

Due to her parents being arrested and her job not existing anymore, she managed to get a visa to move to the states for political protection.

She landed in Kola, and joined a biker’s gang, which is the best thing she did in her life.

Due to being deprived of meals often when she was younger, she now has a very large appetite, although she does burn off all excess by training.

Probably gets paid to help people get revenge on whoever did them wrong.

ARWEN DAE SHEEN looks an awful lot like ARDEN CHO. SHE is TWENTY-NINE and while they’re FUN-LOVING, they have a tendency to get pretty CLUMSY. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to WEIRD PEOPLE by LITTLE MIX. 

Dae was born in Korea, but before she was even 5, her parents were targetted for a crime they did not comit, but the culprit created false proofs, so they had to flee the country.

They landed in England for a few years, building a new life. And by doing so, they all changed their names. They didn’t want to be traced back, although they did keep their last names. She was only 5 though and would only come up with random names, so her parents named her after a character from their favorite book series.

Her father later on got a job offer in Kola, California, so the family moved there. Arwen was probably about 8-9.

And she’s been in Kola since, and doesn’t plan on moving out, since she fell in love with the town.

She currently works as an elementary school teacher, as well as a fencing instructor by night.

CARSON MCALLISTER looks an awful lot like ALEXANDER KOCH. HE is TWENTY-SEVEN and while they’re IDEALISTIC, they have a tendency to get pretty DERANGED. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to WICKED by BOY EPIC. 

My fucked up son I haven’t played in ages.

Son of the police chief in Kola, and a high school teacher, who sadly passed away giving birth to him.

His father was not a good man. Carson grew up seeing him bring in women, at first acting like a true gentleman, until he became abusive with them and they left. And that did rub on him with time.

During high school, he fell in love with this girl, she was the light of his life. They were together for nearly 5 years, before they broke up. He was training to become a police officer like his dad, and she felt their paths were diverging.

He... did not take it, and locked her up in one of the rooms of his very large house. His father working crazy hours and that room being empty, never realized it until a few weeks later. A missing notice person was filled, and his father suspected him. The house was searched, they found the girl, and Carson was arrested.

He did time, and is only coming out of jail now, has no job, probably couch surfing since his father won’t talk to him.

Still wants his ex back tbfh.

GENESIS FERRER looks an awful lot like ZOE SALDANA. SHE is THIRTY-SEVEN and while they’re LOYAL, they have a tendency to get pretty OPINIONATED. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to SORRY NOT SORRY by DEMI LOVATO.

Her parents moved to the states before she was born. But they later on got deported, although since she was born there, she was placed in foster care. (would’ve much rather prefered to be taken with her parents)

Was intentionally bad with all foster families because she was salty. She’s always been kind of a brat.

After graduating, she started studying management, while also working as a part time security guard at the mall. 

One thing lead to another, and when she graduated, Genesis decided to start her own security company. So now she owns a company, who people basically employ to guard their buildings, malls, shops, zoo, whatever.

Was never able to get a serious relationship because she’s very distant with people. BUT I SWEAR SHE HAS LOVE TO GIVE.

Also I’m making her a green alien in the future verse because I CAN.

MADELEINE STOKES looks an awful lot like KYLIE BUNBURY. SHE is TWENTY-SEVEN and while they’re CHARISMATIC, they have a tendency to get pretty JUDGEMENTAL. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to BO$$ by FIFTH HARMONY.

This character was originally an April Pearson fc? But she has like no good resources? So here we have the lovely Kylie instead.

Filthy rich family, she was spoiled to death. And it got to her head. But her parents also thought her that she’ll have to work for her own money when she’s older.

Queen Bee all through her school career. People looked up to her, but also feared what she could do.

Currently works as weather girl for the local channel.

That character was also originally inspired by Regina George, so she does keep a Burn Book, which she’s had since high school, and still adds stuff to it.

MARGARET BALDWIN looks an awful lot like DAISY RIDLEY. SHE is TWENTY-FIVE and while they’re METICULOUS, they have a tendency to get pretty INDIVIDUALISTIC. You’ve probably seen them around Kola listening to CAN’T BE TAMED by MILEY CYRUS.

Daughter of Gustav, he used her as one of his test subjects.

When it got debunked, her mother and her changed identities, and while it did mess with her head, it was nothing compared to her mom.

It wasn’t much later that her mom had to be sent to a psychiatric rehab center, and is still there. As for Nicoline Margaret, her neighbour was kind enough to take her in for as long as it might take.

They already had two kids, so she grew up with two people she now considers her siblings.

She always did good in school, but was horrible at following simple rules and orders. So after graduating, she went into journalism and is now an investigative journalist.

She hates her dad, and wished he would still be in jail. Actually erased him from her life and didn’t even know he was out until she went to see her mom and she mentioned he visited her.

She’s very bad at relationships but I swear if you bring me John Boyega, Adam Driver and/or Oscar Isaac, as exes, current crushes, FWB, or whatever you can think of, I will forever love you.

[djetan9282]

I hate my life so much.

I hate myself.

I have nothing special about me dammit, no one really wants me.

This year has done nothing but make me feel like shit when I look at it. I was never smart, never special, never unique. I’m just a gross, booger eating overweight loser who tries so hard to feel like they’re worth a damn, but all I am is a burden and a bunch of fat lobbed into a retarded hispanic.

I hate that I feel like this, like I feel unloved, like the only one who even shows me affection is my dog, which makes me even sadder because he’s old, he’s going to die sooner or later, and I don’t know how I’ll handle it. I feel he doesn’t even really love me, like I’m the only one who bothers to feed him, to let him sleep in my room, my bed, to walk him, because no one else bothers anymore these days.

I hate I’ve never had a relationship where I could say I wasn’t alone. I’ve never had a girlfriend, and even though I only recently accepted I’m bisexual, it hardly even matters, because I don’t feel a longing for a boyfriend, I know it wouldn’t be good either, because my family probably wouldn’t be happy for it. My mom’s a “catholic” but it feels like it’s nothing but a front now for her being a goddamn terrible person.

Speaking of, I used to love my mom. Now, I feel nothing for her. She’s always expecting of me, but I can’t do anything, I’m worthless. No one wants to hire me. I’m practically wasting money at school now, I waste money every day, and she does nothing but remind me of it and scold me. She says shit like “I’m telling you this because you need to” but fuck I don’t feel any damn love anymore, I feel like I’m nothign but a damn errand boy 1/10th of the time and a burden the rest

i watch my sibling every damn day, it feels like she probably tolerates me the most, but only because she hardly sees us anymore either. She has her damn boyfriend, who I hate because he’s more or less everything I hate about myself in a rich white package. Hell, my older sister’s boyfriend makes me feel the damn same about myself. Every negative trait I see in myself I see in them too. Except at least THEY have relationships, at least they know love, I don’t feel like anyone wants me. I only give my younger sibling what they want, what they said they need, because it’s all I’m good for, for taking them to their friends, taking their friends home, buying them food because they “forgot” their wallet or keys, or anything. I’m just a convenience to them.

I don’t remember the last time I saw my dad. My family’s issues have broken us all up. I barely want to see him anymore because I feel like my mom’s going to explode for seeing him in the first place. And I know he’s no saint either, but at least because he’s not always there to talk me down I don’t always feel like a worthless piece of shit either, at least he tries to me offer me something. And I worry I’m still going to be like him either, the kind of person who lies and has affairs behind his family’s back, the kind of person who isn’t there to comfort me, who I’m not confident enough to ask to comfort me when I need to.

I have no friends. David left years ago, we talk on Discord, but it all feels so meaningless these days, I know he’s busy, I know he’s also had it rough, far rougher than me, but I feel so lonely. Alex I barely even speak with anymore, he never seems to have time, I know he’s probably very busy, still going to college, still working, still living with his folks, but it still feels like he probabaly forgets me and shit like that, hell, I even feel kinda guilty, like the only reason I’m his “friend” is because of David and he never really told me to piss off, which is terrible because after David left I did really feel like we kinda stuck together so we weren’t really alone anymore, I dunno, but I feel terrible and unfit for him, who actually has a life compared to me. Practically everyone else I knew in high school, I either lost ways of talking to them or just stopped talking. And even now in college I feel like any friendships I try to make I end up leaving to die anyway, like it doesn’t matter, and I feel just terrible for that, because I want friends, I want to not be lonely anymore, but I’m a terrible person who can’t follow anything through.

I’ve been trying these last few months out of school to find something I can do. No one wants to hire me. I started writing about last year, but it’s nothing but fanfiction, no one really cares about what I write anyway, it’s just worthless smut most of the time and these days I can barely push myself to finish something, even projects I even got into writing fanfiction for, which I can see acting out like a movie in my head, but I never can bother because again, I am a terrible fucking person.  I’ve been trying to draw, but I clearly hang out with much of the wrong crowd, because I try drawing crappy nsfw porn and it’s never good, I never was good at any of it. I’m still trying now, ask a few people on discord, I try posting crap on discord servers hoping to get any response out but i hardly get anything, and the few times I feel I get anything it’s mostly the shit like “practice anatomy” or “try not drawing nsfw” but believe me I feel like it’s a nasty habit because I feel like I want to draw nothing BUT that and I know everyone means well but it only makes me more sure it wasn’t meant for me, I always knew I was never good, never an artist, but now that I have so little in my life I do nothing but try hopelessly for this shit

I feel like half my mutuals here don’t really care for me and I hate it. Thed, if you’re reading this, you seem like a cool guy, I’d love to get to hang with you in person since you’re apparently in Miami Dade or somewhere around South Florida, but I feel unworthy of it all the same. Madalyn, Stephen, you seem nice, I’d love to get to know you better too, but I’m stuck here in this hellhole of my life and again I don’t feel like I’m worthy of you guys attention, we only really talked through overwatch and since then doesn’t feel like I offer much to you guys either. Charles, you’re a good kid, I hope you know that, and you already have life so much better handled than me, you have a job with your family, I don’t even have that, even though my dad started his own business this year. Rory, I really do enjoy the talks we had, I miss when we used to talk more, I felt less lonely about life then.

And that’s not even getting into the porn artists I’ve met over the past year either. Fuck, there’s so many of them, but they all were nice people, and it’s funny, as much as I try to cheer them up when they’re down, I myself am depressed as shit, except it’s because I feel like I’m trying to copy you all and it’s just worthless and I shouldn’t even be trying on this because I’m a talentless hack. You all have something, but fuck, I’m worthless, I can’t even draw a circle clean, let alone a damn tit.

So many bots come to me. I see them practically every day, my follower list feels like it’s 90% bots, 10% actual people who follow me out of guilt. I remember when I first saw someone follow me on this site, I felt somewhat special, like someone actually cared a bit for me, but now all I see are 10 porn bots a day and I’m too tired and lazy and broken to search through them.

And again, porn. I feel like I’ve used it to cope for so much for so long it’s a daily thing now, and that’s probably not good. People say “oh, it’s only natural, everyone masturbates” and shit like that, but these days I see so much, I follow so many porn blogs because I have this damn problem, I feel so little, I don’t even masturbate to half the stuff I like and reblog on my nsfw blog because there’s just that much. There’s so much on my feed, I have to many porn mutuals, which I follow all on this main blog of course because I was an idiot and didn’t use another email, just made a damn subblog for it, and yeah, it did the trick, but now it feels like there’s probably more people who care for what I post there than here, and even then, it’s just because of how much I reblog. I have people who actually can make stuff following me there, and I just say every time “why” because I’m really nothing special, I just happen to be really fucked up enough to have made a blog just for that when I honestly didn’t need one.

Ugh, this is just a goddamn mess right now. I just typed out whatever came to mind, whatever I could feel, and at first, this started with me wanting to cry and it led me me tearing up because of how much I hate myself and now I just came back to the hate, because I really am not worth it. I wonder how many people actually read this clusterfuck trainwreck of text, because it’s what describes me the fucking most. I feel like none of you care anyway, and that’s probably for the better, it’s better you don’t waste your time with a waste like me. I’m sorry. Don’t worry, I’m not going to off myself. I’m too afraid to off myself. I fear death too much, I want to think it’s God’s way of telling me I still have something worth living for, but I sure don’t feel it or anything to live for. I just want to be worth something, to be happy, to be important to someone, to be special. Something I’ll never be.

[saferincages]

gAme over: in my end is my beginning

I can’t stop thinking about that ridiculous, unsatisfying finale, and how spectacular it COULD have been had they simply planned it well in advance and timed it properly. There are so many plot holes/plot threads/red herrings/unanswered questions that I cannot even begin to address them all, and I dreamed this up fairly quickly, so I apologize that it is a very rough draft and doesn’t resolve certain things completely, but it’s a sketched out version of the way I imagine this plot being able to actually work on some level:

Alex Drake is an unhappy and unstable child, abandoned by her adoptive parents and left to fend for herself at a young age, and when she is a teenager, she decides to find out the truth about her birth parents. She steals or hacks her adoption records, discovers their names and the place of her birth, and sets out for Rosewood, PA. When she arrives, she discovers that she has both an older sister, Cece Drake, and a twin sister, Spencer Hastings. Cece has recently been released from Radley (for whatever backstory reason you want to give her, because anything would be better reasoning than her canonical reveal), and is living independently, so Alex approaches her first, assuming (correctly) that she will have less of a chance of being rejected by another lost sibling than by the parents of her twin. Though Alex is of course immediately drawn to Spencer, Cece tells her horrible things about the Hastings, along with the fact that Spencer has no idea she was adopted, and so, instead of immediately introducing herself to Spencer, she hangs back to see what her life is like. 

She discovers that Spencer is close friends with a girl who is (as far as she can see) an awful bully, so she decides that the best way to immediately ingratiate herself to her twin and her twin’s friends is to remove this bully from their lives. “That Night,” she witnesses the girls’ sleepover in the barn, realizes Ali has drugged them, and takes the opportunity. She attacks Ali, hitting her over the head, meaning to frighten but not kill her - but, of course, she doesn’t know the girls all that well yet, and recognizing Ali from behind in the dark and the utter chaos of the night proves difficult. The girl she actually hit was Sara Harvey, who was simply passing through Rosewood - Melissa (also mistakenly thinking Sara was Ali), witnesses this attack and thinks she’s seeing Spencer, who is struggling with substance abuse and the mood swings and memory lapses which accompany it, murder Ali. Horrified, she approaches the body in a panic, but she sees her face, and knows it isn’t Alison. She rushes up to Ali’s room, where Ian is still waiting, and Ian (because of the NAT Club, or because Ali told him at Hilton Head, choose whichever makes more sense) has discovered that Ali has been planning to disappear, and tells Melissa she’s already gone. Ali left behind both her yellow top and her name bracelet. Melissa and Ian dress the body of the anonymous girl in Ali’s clothing, and bury her in the backyard, assuming that, should anyone find her, they will initially believe it’s Alison, and it will force her to stay away (both of them want her out of town, let’s say they’re the ones who replace her dental records and such, too), but Melissa is also attempting to cover it up to protect her sister (she does not tell Ian she witnessed the murder, and Ian assumes it’s Melissa herself who killed her, thinking she was Alison).

Alex flees back to Cece, but says nothing about what she’s done. Ali is reported missing, and Cece is wracked with grief and anger, and she tells Alex a piece of their story she’d withheld before - their connection to the DiLaurentis family. Ali is both their cousin and Cece’s good friend, as Cece spent the summer getting to know her, as an initial attempt to reforge a connection to her family. Alex, having no idea that the attack she planned was against her own cousin, cannot confess what she did, for fear of Cece’s wrath, and not wanting the only family she’s ever known to reject her and throw her out. 

The girls are traumatized, and Aria’s family leaves for Iceland - all also throwing a wrench in Alex’s plan to reveal herself as their defender and become part of the group. A year passes, Aria returns, the girls begin to reforge their friendship, and Mona is -A. During this time, Cece and Alex watch and wait, for different reasons - Cece becomes more and more convinced that the girls are guilty of harming Ali that night, and wants to punish them; Alex becomes more and more obsessed with their lives, their friendship, and how “good” they seemingly have it. When Mona is admitted into Radley, Cece (knowing the place all too well due to her time there), steals the game, with Alex as her helper - disguised as Redcoat and Black Veil (Alex has to either wear the Ali mask and blond wig, or a veil over her face, because, of course, no one can know she looks exactly like Spencer). Cece’s intent is finding out what happened to Ali, but Alex has ulterior motives - she’s decided to take Spencer’s place. Cece has already begun to build the Dollhouse, thinking that kidnapping the girls will push them to tell the truth about what happened to Ali, and she and Alex devise the plan of the night in the woods with the body they fake as Toby’s, pushing Spencer to the breaking point. The plan is to put Alex in Spencer’s place while she’s in Radley, as the first step to luring and eventually abducting the rest of the girls, but a sudden twist occurs - while Spencer is in the hospital, Ali sneaks in to visit her, and Cece discovers that she’s alive. 

Cece’s intentions shift, as she now wants to bring Ali home, and Alex becomes a liability. Unbeknownst to Alex, during this time, Cece has tracked down their birth mother, Mary, and Cece convinces Mary to take Alex back to London. Alex is infuriated to be taken out of the game, but goes with her mother because she wants the chance to know her. In London, she realizes Melissa (who, of course, is also her sister) has moved there, too, and she can’t give up her interest in her family or her propensity for stalking, so she watches her, and sees her with her charming British fiancee, Wren. She becomes infatuated, and eventually approaches him, as Spencer, which is the first time she’s able to test whether or not someone will believe her in her twin’s place. She convinces him not to tell anyone that she’s there, and his feelings for Spencer override logic, so he keeps quiet. By the time she finally admits her true identity (which she is forced to do when Spencer comes to London to visit Oxford), he is already in love with her, and promises to keep her secret.

Ezra has also been spying on the girls, for his ~book~ (I hate this, but want to try and keep this as close to the convoluted canon as possible, so), and Cece approaches him, saying she has additional information that could help him finish writing it, but what she really wants is to take advantage of his knowledge and clues to discover Ali’s whereabouts, which they do, when they find her in Ravenswood. All of those events can remain in place (it’s been a long time since I saw those seasons, so forgive me for being fuzzy on the details?), but the girls can still find Ali in NYC and bring her home, and of course, Mona still wouldn’t want that, leading to her “death” as Cece takes her to the Dollhouse so that she won’t expose everything Cece has done or tell the girls all that she knows.

S5, the Dollhouse, and the events subsequent to it can also essentially stay the same - Cece tells the girls a twisted version of the truth (passing herself off as Ali’s long lost older sister, not Spencer’s, to protect both Alex and Mary’s identities), and is admitted to Welby. Alex stays in London with Wren, because she’s content for the time being simply to have someone who loves her. He tries his best to help her with her delusions, her obsessions, and her rage, and she tries to give up her thoughts of Rosewood. Mary, assured of her youngest daughter’s safety, returns to Pennsylvania to keep an eye on Cece’s care, and to confront her sister and Peter for the mess they’ve made (thus, the details with Jessica’s murder also remain, but would happen a bit later in the narrative).

Five years pass, and Cece’s release is imminent, and Alex begins to become interested in returning to Rosewood and revealing herself, though Wren has qualms about it. But then, Cece is murdered. (idc about Archer, but he could feasibly still be a part of the plot, although I’d prefer him not to dupe Ali into marrying him). At this point, Alex would’ve known her older sister for something like seven years (even if she wasn’t physically with her the entire time, their bond is strong, it’s easy to assume they’d have stayed in contact even while Cece was in Welby), and she snaps - just as Cece assumed the girls must have done something to Ali on the night that started everything, Alex now assumes they must have killed her beloved sister. She wants revenge, and in her sister’s honor, she continues the game, plotting all the girls’ downfall, and determined to finally take her rightful place in the town from whence she same. 

We, the audience, know of Alex’s existence from at LEAST Cece’s reveal, if not sooner, and thus the suspense of when she reveals herself to the girls builds continually, plus there could be a lot more scenes of possibly not knowing whether we’re watching the real Spencer or not, along with being able to witness scenes of Alex clearly being creepy in the background and planning her torture for the girls. 

They are all targeted and taunted, but they all also actively work together to figure out who this person is, and end it once and for all. They are real participants, not sidelined and irrelevant in their final episode. A lot of S7 (especially 7B) would need to be polished and reworked, but it could have been done, and everything would still wrap back to That Night, and Alex would’ve been someone who had, indeed, been hiding in plain sight for years, rather than being a coincidental encounter in a London bar. Where Cece hated the girls and viewed them as her objects, her dolls to manipulate, Alex has developed a twisted love for them (limerence, perhaps?), she wants them to know how smart she is, how long she’s watched them and shadowed their lives, how much she deserves (in her mind) to be loved and accepted by them (this sort of retreads Mona’s motive, but then...so does everything else...but I think it might have led to the girls actually realizing that perhaps they ought to have let Mona in a bit more? idk), and if they won’t let her in for who she is, then she’ll have to take her twin’s place. Liars’ Lament has some sort of real purpose, the puzzle makes an actual picture (imagine if it was Spencer’s face, and for a moment the other four girls think Spencer is AD and spend at least an episode terrified and suspecting her, before they begin to piece together that the person who has been with them for a while...wasn’t Spencer at all). Alex uses the blueprint her sister established, intending to house Spencer underground, and there’s another cell for whomever murdered Cece, too (so, Spence and Mona would’ve been in there together, rather than Spence and Ezra, although she still could’ve kidnapped Ezra in the finale too, it’s almost irrelevant, as frustrating as that is). Spencer is abducted from the Blind School, and replaced, and Alex is masquerading in her shoes for the entirety of 7B, so the girls have many episodes to observe her odd behavior, spend time with her, and begin to unravel the final mystery, concluding with them solving the mystery and racing to rescue their missing best friend (I also would’ve had Alex die at the end, but ymmv).

You can extrapolate details from there (whether Wren helped her or not, how much Mona/Ezra/Melissa/Jenna/Jason/Ian/Wilden/Garrett/whomever knew, etc etc), but these are the primary issues it could have fixed:

Bethany, since she was ultimately meaningless, never existed, the body was always Sara, and thus Shower Harvey as we knew her isn’t in the story

Alex being Redcoat/Black Veil gives an actual reason for that enigmatic figure’s existence

The fixation on the girls’ appearances pre-Ali’s disappearance (ie: the way they were dressed in the Dollhouse, the way their game pieces were designed) was because Alex had been observing them since that time.

Cece was always a mistreated daughter, eliminating all the problematic “Charles” issues, and...there are just so many unresolved issues with her reveal that would have to be filled in differently that I honestly can’t even begin to chart them, but I know there’s a way to make her reasoning less messy.

Events of That Night, Melissa protecting Spencer (even the flashback with Spencer and the shovel being spattered in blood could’ve been explained, it was Alex), why Spencer was targeted to be broken in such a vicious way in S3 - it would all tie together (I think the lodge fire could be a puzzle piece fit into place here, too, but it’s been so long since I watched those episodes that I don’t trust my memory to make sense of it).

The motives are still a bit muddy and hinge on abandonment and feelings of scorn/loneliness/loss of family (plus mental illness), but at least there’s more clarity than...what they gave us, at least there’s a path that goes back to the start.

This doesn’t resolve things like ezrA (my ultimate favorite theory), or any other truly epic theory that has been written and analyzed in the fanbase over the years; it doesn’t fix myriad plot holes and nonsensical clues (again, a lot of which might have been written and delivered entirely differently had this been planned in a more linear fashion and had Alex been established much sooner), but I’m trying to work with what we were actually given by the writers, to see if there was a way to make it thrilling and compelling, and I’m convinced they could have, had they invested the thought and the time, and it breaks my heart that they didn’t, that they took a show that was exciting and unique and beloved by many, and made such a mess of both its mystery and of its brave, complicated heroines. I still consider their sisterhood and friendship to be important and beautiful and iconic, but the mystery should have been, too.

(Feel free to add to this with clarity and/or details if you wish!)