#and also would keep me from stopping every 5 minutes to check my phone while i’m drawing lmao

[vulcannic]

hey so i got obs working on my old pc and i want to start doing some art streams but i really have no clue about anything so i was wondering if anyone has any good resources? or just basic tips and tricks?

i’ve been watching some videos but i feel like there’s so much to learn lol

[gisellecnz]

𝐀/𝐧: Okay, first of all—anon, I am SO SORRY TO KEEP YOU WAITING, I've had a new sy started so I was a little busy..😭😭 and I'm sorry maybe you wanted me to answer your ask directly to the post wherein I publish the fic already, so here's a photo of your ask in a screen shot form. 😭 Also, first would be gojo, and then next is Geto!!

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: gojo x reader

𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭: gojo took longer than expected to go home so reader is worried, angst to fluff, gojo babying you, fluff at the end

tick, tock, tick, tock

You stared at the clock, watching it tick and tock. It was past twelve, and each second felt like it lasted forever.

Satoru told you that he'd be home around 9 or 10 from his three-week overseas mission today, but there was no sound of keys clanging at the door, nor any update from him telling you that he'd be home in how many minutes left.

A tired sigh left from your lips, your eyelids becoming heavy as you slumped down on the couch that was near the entrance – your worry increasing every second for Satoru.

You grabbed your phone that was sat on the wooden table, turning it on as you checked your lock screen to see if there was any notification from Satoru – still none.

You opened the app where you and Satoru always communicated, whenever you two were separated. Your recent message to him – "Satoru? Are things going okay with the mission? How many hours left till you're home?" – was still left on delivered after 5 hours. It didn't show that he was active either. What was going on? He'd always text you back immediately. That was not exactly like him at all.

Anxiety was growing inside you each and every second you think about Satoru. Did something go wrong on his mission? No, you shouldn't think about that. He's strong—he should be able to survive. But what if he encountered a dangerous cursed relic?

Sigh. Negative thoughts kept filling up your mind, you tried to reassure yourself that everything went fine, but it just couldn't stop to the point it brought you to tears.

After a many minutes later, you heard keys jingling outside, indicating that someone is trying to open the door outside. Was that Satoru?

As the door creaked open, you quickly wiped away your tears and sat up straight, your heart pounding in anticipation.

And there, you saw him. Satoru was standing in the doorway. He looked more worn out than usual but was still unharmed. His hair was slightly tousled, and had dried blood stains on his jacket. You eyes looked down to his hands, which were holding on some sweets and a gift for you.

"Hey," he said softly. He noticed the tired look on your face, and the way your eyes we're wet and slightly puffy. Did you stay up all night for him? He felt bad. He closed the door behind him, and dropped his gifts on the couch beside him.

"Satoru, " you breathed out, relief washing over you as you ran to hug him tightly, whilst more tears were running down your face. "I was so worried. You got home so late and you didn't respond to my messages."

"I'm so sorry baby." He said, pulling you into a tighter embrace. Leaning in to give your forehead a gentle kiss. "The mission took longer than expected, and I forgot I had my phone inside my pocket while fighting and it broke...I was absolutely panicking when I realized I wouldn't be able to text you." He pulled back slightly to look at you, brushing a stray tear from your cheek with his thumb. "But I'm here now, yeah? I'm safe, dont worry. You shouldn't have stayed up all night to wait for me baby... " he plants another kiss on your forehead.

You buried your face in his chest, the familiar scent of him calming your racing heart. "B-but... How can I not sleep after you were gone for so many days, and you came home later..." Your words were a bit muffled due to you burying your face into his jacket, giving him a small weak punch on his chest as you sniffled in your cries.

Satoru's face softened into a sad expression, guilt evident in his eyes as he looked down at you. He gently cupped your face, lifting it so your eyes met his. "I know, I know. M'very sorry baby. Didn't mean to make you worry so much."

Seeing the tears streaming down your face made his heart ache. "It's okay baby, don't cry anymore. Hm? It's okay, I'm here now."

He rested his chin on top of your head, "I bought you some sweets and a little gift. I knew you'd be upset once I came back."

"You didn't need too..."

"Why not?"

You can imagine the pout on his face as he starts to gently sway you from side to side, whilst rubbing your back in circles.

"Alright, alright. Let's go back to bed now. Don't want my princess to get sick from staying aaaalll night long just for waiting for me.

in the end you both cuddled so tightly and you woke up to a bunch of gifts, he felt bad about you worrying so much about him and he thought the gifts from last night weren't enough 🥲

[lily-fics-11]

I Can See You: Chapter 5 (Ellie Williams, TLOU)

I Can See You

Fic master post here

*Not beta read

This took forever and I’m so sorry😭 Since I last updated, I took a trip to see my girlfriend and she came to see me too (if it seems like I’m in my lover girl era it’s because I am). I went on a trip to Disney (I am an extensive planner, I even made spreadsheets. I put my heart and soul into it) (I had to prep my body and mind as well, for spending that much time with my mother, also the Florida heat and tons of walking). I’ve done a bunch of babysitting and have been on the hunt for a full-time job! I missed writing and hope to get to do it much more often now!!!

Ellie Williams is a player, on and off the lacrosse field. You begin tutoring her so that she can get her grades up and stay on the team. You try to keep things professional, however, your affection is a great motivator. Ellie wouldn't be caught dead with you so you become her secret mission. 

Chapter 5

Ellie gets a little jealous when another girl shows interest in you. You share many sweet moments as she tries to spend every second with you that she can.

Word count: 4k

CW: *Ellie and reader are both 18* profanities, sexual innuendo/references, semi-intimate situations, mentions of drinking/smoking weed

You and Ellie spend the rest of the time before her practice kissing and planning dates. Neither of you can wait to share your dorky interests with the other. 

Picking up your phone, while getting ready to leave, you see a text from Elise. It’s not about homework. You audibly groan and Ellie raises an eyebrow.

“I got a text from Elise,” you tell her and then read it out loud. “Are you going to Kyle’s Saturday night? I’m hoping to see you there.”

Ellie’s face scrunches up in disgust, but she doesn’t say anything.

“I told her to only text me for school stuff. I’m going to remind her,” You tell Ellie, then type out a text while reading it out loud. 

“I'm happy to answer your questions about school work, but I’m not looking to be involved with you in the way I think that you want us to be. I’m your tutor now and that wouldn’t be appropriate.” Ellie laughs at that, you ignore the irony. “Also, I’m seeing a girl that I like a lot, you and I aren’t going to be anything more than friendly.” 

“You tell her.” Ellie nods in approval, hyping you up. “That girl better watch herself. She might be disrespecting what you want on purpose, but she doesn’t know that she is disrespecting me too.”

Elise asks who you are seeing so you tell her that the girl goes to North, not someone she would know. Ellie laughs again, though somewhat maniacally this time. 

Ellie hugs you while saying goodbye, holding your close, not letting you leave until she is satisfied. She kisses you softly, longingly, and the taste of her lips lingers on yours for a while after you have parted ways. 

Ellie calls you that night, to check that no one was bothering you. You tell her that Elise had continued asking more questions but you stopped answering.

Ellie was not happy to hear that. 

The next morning you get a text from Ellie.

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: You free during home room today?

You: Yes!

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Meet me in the science wing bathroom at 8

You like the message and finish getting ready. You get a hall pass and leave to meet Ellie. The science wing is empty during homeroom, so it’s a good spot to be alone.

When you walk in Ellie is leaning back with her hands on the sink. 

“We’ve unlocked a new location,” she points out enthusiastically. 

“We have,” you giggle at how cute she is.

“Less than ideal, but I like getting to see you in person.”

“You spend plenty of time seeing me in person,” you tease her. She walks over to you and flips your hood over your head.

“Actually spending time with you,” she specifies grabbing your hands to pull your arms around her.

You lean your head onto Ellie’s shoulder. “It is really nice getting to hang out with you. Even if it’s only for a few minutes.”

“A few minutes?!” She practically yells in your ear. 

“It may be normal for you to disappear for a half hour but if I’m gone more than 5 minutes people are going to think I’ve got explosive diarrhea or something.”

Her face is contorted in confusion until it hits her, eliciting a discouraged sigh.“You study during homeroom don’t you?”

You raise an eyebrow. “That’s what it’s there for.”

Ellie waves a hand in the air dismissively. “It’s like those yellow speed signs, a suggestion.”

Your jaw drops and you shake your head in mock disapproval. “Remind me not to get in a car with you.”

“I am a GREAT driver. I’ll pick you up for our first date and show you.” Ellie says matter-of-factly. Eyebrows furrowed, but a smile pulling at the corners of her mouth. 

Your heart flutters at the mention of a first date, but it is against your nature to halt the banter. “I’ll just have to bring a helmet.”

“I’m coordinated enough to play lacrosse. You on the other hand, I bet you hit a lot of curbs.”

“I plead the fifth!” You stick your tongue out at her. 

“I know that one!” Ellie informs you with enthusiasm, eager to impress you.

“I feel like you are the kind of person to know the rules so that you can break them most effectively,” you tease her and you can tell by the look in her eyes that you are right on the money. 

Ellie throws her hands up in the air. “I want my lawyer!”

You playfully shove her and she grabs your arms to rope you into a hug.

On Friday during your tutoring session with Elise you are working in a textbook. You slide the book towards her to point to the asymptote in the graph and she puts her hand on top of yours. You quickly pull away and you hear a textbook fall off a shelf nearby, but don't think anything of it. 

When Elise asks to borrow your pencil sharpener she tries to slide her hand over yours once again. Before you can react someone coughs loudly from the other side of a book shelf. Elise gets startled and quickly lets go.  

Reading over an answer to a problem Elise had done you hear a very familiar voice hoarsely whisper “what the fuck!”

You look around for Ellie but the first thing you notice is Elise’s arm around the back of your chair. 

“Do that again and you won’t have a tutor anymore,” you tell her sternly and she folds her arms across her chest in a huff. 

Looking around you see a pair of eyes peeking through a hole on the bookshelf, they are green and sparkling in a way that tells you they are accompanied by a smile. Further down the shelf you see another face poking through, Paz, accompanying Ellie on her little mission. 

You pull out your phone and send Ellie a text. 

You: Are you spying on me???

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: I have no idea what you are talking about

You: None at all?

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: You’re right. Now that I’m thinking about it Paz mentioned something about undercover work

You look back towards Ellie and Paz and they quickly duck out of sight. You have to stifle your laugh and refocus on your job.

Friday at the end of the school day you head to the locker room to retrieve your gym clothes, they need to be washed. You are giddy at the prospect of catching a glimpse of Ellie. Even if you don’t get to talk to her, let alone be near her. 

When you enter the locker room you are greeted by the sound of a ruckus. You hear a crash a few rows back, like someone fell into a locker. 

You creep down the rows of lockers to investigate. That requires navigation through a crowd of softball and lacrosse players. You see Ellie hovering in an offensive stance over Elise, who is crouching slightly, as if recovering from a hit. 

“What the hell, Williams?” Elise asks in disgust, shoving Ellie away from her. 

Ellie pushes her back, much harder. “Just think you need to watch yourself, Knolls.”

Elise doesn’t retaliate this time, Ellie plays lacrosse she knows how to rough someone up. “Fuck is that supposed to mean?”

Ellie pushes Elise up against the lockers and pins her there. You may or may not be jealous. “Don’t ever get in my way again.” The gathered crowd collectively gasps but no one tries to intervene. After staring Elise down long enough to make her point, Ellie lets go of her and turns away. Elise watches confused, pissed off, and embarrassed. You know why Ellie is angry with her, though you are baffled that she would display those emotions so publicly. 

What if Elise told someone about this and Ellie ended up in the principal’s office? What would she tell her? Sorry, she was flirting with the girl I like. She was MY tutor first! 

This isn’t a side of Ellie you are familiar with. This aggression is uncalled for, but it’s attractive. Seeing her physically fight for you? It has you in a lust filled haze. 

The crowd disperses and Ellie walks past you. Her cheeks flush when she spots you, realizing you saw what just happened. But her expression turns cocky when she sees the hunger in your eyes. She bites her lip and winks at you. Her hand reaches so that her fingertips brush over your waist. No one else could have seen because of the way you two were positioned. Normally you would have panicked, but the public display of affection was concealed by the angle of her body. Not to mention the way you caught up in the passion you share. 

Even after Ellie passes by, you stand there dumbfounded. Nonetheless, you force yourself to shake it off in order to continue on with your day. But your phone buzzes…

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: You liked that didn’t you?

Everyone else should be gone in about 10

Want to wait around?

You: That was a bad idea, confronting her like that

But yes I liked it

And yes I’ll be waiting 

You dawdle at your locker while the chatting dies down to silence and footsteps are no longer falling.

Ellie approaches you and leans against a locker with her arms crossed. 

“You know where my gym locker is?” You question.

“Did you really think I wouldn’t know where to watch you get changed?”

You playfully hit Ellie in the arm. “Shut up!” 

“My locker is right on the other side.” She admits. “Doesn’t matter how many voices are around, I can always hear yours.”

Focusing down on your shoes you blink rapidly and take a deep breath, unsure of how to handle this attention. Yes, you’ve received this type of attention before. But Ellie being the girl that notices you is still incomprehensible. Not only that, you have now seen her feelings towards you exist outside of when you two are alone. Sweet moments in secret are one thing, but her defending your honor? Of course no one knows that’s what it is, but it doesn't stop your head from spinning. 

Ellie tilts your face up with her pointer finger and your wide eyes stare into hers, they are focused on you. 

“What?” She asks, her worry evident in her expression as she searches yours for a clue of how you are feeling. 

“It’s nothing,” you lie and Ellie raises an eyebrow. She knows you too well now to get away with that. 

“Well…” your voice is soft and timid. “It’s that… you just … seem to care a lot about me. And it’s sweet.

“I do care a lot about you. I guess I need to make that more clear. I have a secret to tell you.” You cock your head to the side in confusion, Ellie leaning close to whisper “I like like you.” In your ear. You start giggling. 

Ellie wraps her arms around your waist and tucks her face into the crook of your neck. You rest your cheek on her soft auburn hair and hold her tight. You feel Ellie take a deep breath, breathing in your scent, and feeling her exhale on your neck sends shivers down your spine. 

“I have to go to practice but I don’t want to,” she mumbles. 

You sigh. “I don’t want you to go either. But super stars don’t skip practice.”

“Super star?” She asks, picking her head up to look at you. Her surprise is so genuine it melts your heart. 

“I watched your old games, Ellie. You really are talented.”

Ellie smirks, her sense of wonder broken by her dirty mind. “Talented,” she repeats. 

You roll your eyes playfully and ignore the comment. “You can’t slow down now. You’ve got another championship to win.”

She nods in agreement, with a sense of duty. “Very true. I’m like a Wendy’s 4 for 4. Plus I am dating the smartest girl and it would be embarrassing if she wasn’t dating the best lacrosse player.”

“I’ll never eat Wendy’s the same way ever again.”

Ellie’s green eyes sparkle devilishly. “Yeah. You’ll be eating me too.”

“I’m looking forward to it. But my super star really does need to get to practice.”

“Will you stay with me until I’m ready to leave?” Ellie asks shyly, a bright flush coloring her freckled face. 

“Of course I can.”

Ellie grabs your hand and leads you over to her locker. She opens it up and pulls out her practice clothes. 

You don’t even pretend that you aren’t watching. Ellie watched you watch her. She pulls her shirt over her head, only momentarily breaking eye contact when the fabric passes over her face. 

Your breath hitches seeing her like this. Her sports bra hugging her exquisitely and her abdomen pleasantly toned. The urge to trace you fingertips over her impressive body burns in the pit of your stomach. 

“Like what you see?” Ellie chuckles, clearly pleased to see you gawking at her. 

“I guess you could say that,” you sigh, pretending like you aren’t ogling at her body. 

“Don’t lie to me, tutor girl.”

You cross your arms and pout. “Fine. I’m impressed. Happy now?”

“Very.” Ellie hooks her arm around your waist and drags you into her, hastily, and you have to grab her shoulders to steady yourself. Ellie presses her forehead to yours and you take a deep breath after she has taken it away. 

“Pretty girl.” Ellie mumbles and you just gaze at her starry eyed. Ellie kisses you gently and you let your hand slide down her body, over her perky breasts and tight abs. You grab her hips firmly when you get there and then distance yourself, still holding on to her. 

“Practice,” you remind her and she groans. Ellie throws on her practice pinnie and then slides down her pants leaving her in her boxers. Thankfully she pulls a pair of shorts over them right away.

Ellie puts her clothes away and starts taking her practice things out. 

“Can you hold this for me?” She asks, extending her lacrosse stick towards you. You nod as you take it. Ellie slings her lacrosse backpack over her shoulder and stops to take you in for a moment. 

“I didn’t actually need you to hold it,” Ellie admits. “I just knew you would look cute.”

You shake your head at her and bite back a smile. 

“I’ll text you after practice,” she tells you before giving you a quick peck on the lips and heading out. 

You stand there dumbfounded for a moment. 

Is this real?

Does Ellie Williams really like you?

This is not something you ever imagined happening, but here you are, kissing her before she goes to practice. 

You literally pinch yourself so that when you get a text from Ellie you know it’s real. 

Ellie sends you a message after she has finished with her practice. You ask each other about your time apart and chat. 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Can you send me your schedule?

You: Plan on stalking me?

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Yes 

I’ve got some of it figured out but I want to try and run into you whenever I can

You send her a picture of your schedule.

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: I didn’t know half these classes existed 

This doesn’t look fun 

Like at all

You: Don’t worry about me😂

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Don’t tell me what to do😡

I’m going to make sure you don’t get too stressed💚

You: I have a few ideas about how you could do that 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: 👀👀👀👀

I will mix wholesome and not so wholesome 

You: Sounds like a plan 

Ellie ends up going on a rant about practice, Abby Anderson did something to piss her off. However, Ellie’s team won their scrimmage so it’s okay.

You text Ellie the rest of the night and end up staying up later than usual until you finally say goodnight. Even though you don’t want to. 

On Saturday Ellie has an away game and then goes to a party with a bunch of her teammates.  

You spend the afternoon studying, then go to a party yourself. Definitely not the same one. 

Elise eyes you from across the room and you ignore her. When your friends ask why you are giving her the cold shoulder you tell them it’s because you are her tutor now. Your friends are relieved, they know how that type of thing has gone in the past. You are happy they don’t know it already happened again.

You socialize outside of your friend group too, politely ignoring any flirting. You have a lot of fun, even if you are waiting for your phone to buzz. 

You hear from Ellie more than you expect to. She keeps you updated on the drama around her and you can tell she had been smoking before she even mentioned it. She is more silly than usual, and it’s incredibly charming, especially since you’ve had a bit to drink. 

Nicole sees you smiling at your phone. “I know that look!”

She gets excited but rolls her eyes when you try to brush it off. She looks you up and down with a bit of an attitude, it’s unlike you to keep this kind of thing from her. 

“Fine. I’m talking to a girl,” you admit and Nicole’s eyes light up.

“Are you going to tell me who it is?” She pesters you, a wildly excited look in her eyes.

You make up a little lie. Nicole isn’t ready for the truth yet. “She goes to North. You wouldn’t know her.” Nicole knows who Ellie is but she doesn’t really know her. Not like you do.

She squints her eyes at you. “Is that all I get?”

“For now.” You take a long sip of your drink, signaling you are moving on from this topic. 

Nicole shakes her head in disapproval. “I guess that’s better than nothing. Don’t think I’ll be forgetting about this.”

You and your friends get picked up around 2 am. On your way back to Nicole’s you get a text from Ellie, asking you to come over. You tell her that you can’t drive anywhere because you’ve been drinking. She says she is high but can walk to you, so you explain that you are sleeping over at a friend’s. Ellie says she will be coordinating with you next weekend because she always misses you extra when she’s intoxicated. 

Sunday is busy. School work, chores, and family dinner.

Ellie gets some homework done too, alongside a bunch of yard work with Joel. 

You get a lovely text from Ellie Monday morning.

You: Good morning:)

What are you doing up so early?

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Getting you coffee 

You: I always make it at home you don’t have to do that 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: I want to. 

And I know your order anyways 

You: How????

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: I took a picture of it that day you came in late with Dunkin 

In case I ever needed it 

You: I’m genuinely impressed

You’re 10 steps ahead 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: 🫡

Meet you at your car when you get to school?

You: What if someone sees us?!

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: I’m like Michael Jackson 

You: ???????

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: A smooth criminal 

You: That’s actually a good one😂

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: I’m glad you said that, otherwise I’d have to beat it 

You: Okay ma’am that’s enough 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Don’t act like this isn’t a thriller for you my PYT

You: You are too much 

In the best way possible 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓:

When you park at school you let Ellie know that you have arrived. 

Out of nowhere Ellie casually strolls by and leaves a cup of coffee on the hood of your car. 

As you are getting out and picking it up Abby pulls in next to you. She gives you a smile and a wave, so you politely wave and smile back. 

Your phone immediately starts ringing and you pick up. 

“NO FUCKING WAY SHE’S GOT THE SPOT NEXT TO YOU!” Ellie yells into the phone and you are grateful the volume wasn’t all the way up. Would’ve burst your eardrums.

“Last year too,” you inform her. 

“My enemy is living my dream,” Ellie practically growls. 

“I would pay good money for you to be my parking neighbor,” you promise her. 

“Top dollar?” She questions, deadly serious.

“Absolutely!” You assure Ellie. You hear her sigh in relief. 

“Thank you. I gotta go but I’ll talk to you later?”

“I would love that!”

“Bye pretty girl,” you can hear Ellie’s smile in her voice.

“Bye El.”

You say hello to Nicole a few minutes later.

“Is that Dunkin’!?” She gasps.

“Uh… yeah?”

“You didn’t even ask me if I wanted any! You always do!” Nicole groans. 

“Sorry, I uh… it totally slipped my mind. I really needed it this morning,” you explain, trying to cover your tracks.

“You should set a location reminder on your phone. When you get to Dunkin’ it will remind you to ask if I want some,” Nicole says, not a hint of sarcasm.

You salute her. “Aye aye captain!”

Your phone buzzes a few times during 5th period, but you don’t check it until class is over. 

Space Nerd 🚀🤓: Don’t go into 6th period right away (12:35 pm)

My class is right across from yours (12:35 pm)

I want to say hi (12:35 pm)

And maybe kiss you👀 (12:35 pm)

Hi (12:47 pm)

Hey (12:53 pm)

You don’t check your phone during class do you (12:55 pm)

When you see the messages you like them all and hurry to your next class. 

As you approach your 6th period class you look for Ellie. She is outside the door across the hall, mindlessly rummaging through her backpack, despite looking around for you and not at all paying attention to what she is doing. Ellie winks at you when she spots you. 

When the bell rings the hallway starts to clear, so you bend down to tie your shoe to stall. 

Once the hallway is almost empty Ellie gets up and starts to walk over to you. Once everyone is gone she says hi and grabs your hand, giving you a quick kiss. 

“I know you don’t want to be late. I’ll see you later.” Ellie holds your hand for another moment before finally letting go and heading across the hall. She gazes back longingly, a pouty frown on her face, not wanting to leave you. 

You bite your lip, just as sad to watch her go, and think to yourself “I don’t know what I’ve gotten myself into, but I don’t think I care.”

Tags: @bready101, @st4r-b3rries, @tlou-bombshell, @stvrs13, @dinanellie, @everegretseverything, @mikellie, @lamolaine, @0pheli4, @soupycloud, @radioheadfan699, @callmelola111, @hysteriawillnotsuccumb, @normalthing111, @3isosoup, @lmaoo-spiderman, @cqliflower 

[jymwahuwu]

i loved your jing yuan rq of him texting you and spamming you constantly 😭 it’s got such a nasty hold on my heart rn

like imagine you’re trying to get work done and your phone goes off every 5 seconds because he wants your attention and tries to distract you from whatever you’re doing so you’ll text him back

he usually sends you wholesome things, but once in a while he’ll send you a shirtless pic, or a pic of him in the mirror with his sweatpants sagging just a little bit to show you his boxers n’ waist

he also loves texting you like any regular husband would. constantly asking you how you’re feeling, complimenting you, trying to lure you into fucking him, and trying to make plans with you. just general domestic things

with the phone s*x though???? oh MAN he 100% will call you saying he has an emergency and when you answer his facetime call it’s him just jerking it and suddenly you can’t hang up and he’s laughing about how flustered you are. cue you throwing the phone and him going, “hey don’t throw me :((“

Thanks for the amazing idea! He'll definitely do it lmao but you won't be fooled a second time right?

related content: yan! jing yuan keeps spamming you and calling you yan! jing yuan visits your home

TW: yandere, harassment, masturbation, (implied) non-con, breaking into a home, hacking

Jing Yuan is really being your "boyfriend" and keeps sending you messages no matter what you're doing. He likes to text you like a normal couple, complimenting you, telling you about his work, sending videos of his cute lion mimi playing with balls of wool and rolling on the floor. Or send you some explicit messages to entice you to have sex with him.

If you tell him you are doing something, Jing Yuan will reply you: okkk :;(∩´﹏`∩);: i won't bother you. A minute later, you get a new message saying he read an article about dating places, and apparently there are different dating fads for people on every planet these days. You don't want to reply at all, but suddenly there are some noises outside the window.

There is a Xianzhou style spaceship flying outside your home window, and a new message tells you that he has booked a restaurant 2 light-years away and is now coming to pick you up.

It's like there's a big "?" over your head. You are petrified.

And facetime call! One night, the general keeps sending you messages telling you that there is an emergency. He has to discuss it with you via video call. You ignore it, but feel a little guilty - what if it's true? He might need your help with something…

"…Your inside is so nice… so soft…" Jing Yuan's long white hair is hanging on his shoulders. His hands are moving up and down, panting and moaning your name. "Oh? Hey baby, I didn't expect it to be connected. You miss me too, don't you?"

"Stop, you- what are you doing…" You frantically checked the button to hang up the phone, but it disappeared. He giggles, urging you to spread your legs now and touch yourself gently. You can only throw the phone aside and allow him to see the ceiling of your house. "Hey don't throw me :(("

This gave the general an idea. You don't believe him now, but Jing Yuan can modify your home communication system so that you can communicate with your boyfriend. He will be able to walk freely in your home as a hologram and give you loving company at all times. You must be feeling lonely at home, right? Before Jing Yuan visits your home, presses your legs to your chest and starts thrusting, holograms can give you some comfort.

[bat-writer]

MAAM

we need a part 2 to the pregnant reader please and thank you 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

Love your work btw!!!

A/N: i didnt think the lash would do so sweep but HERE WE GO! I also turned this into a mixture of head cannons and a regular fic

Warnings: descriptions of birth and delivery

You were actually overdue by a couple of days. Your baby was supposed to come during last week, but they decide to take their sweet time.

However, this meant it was just more strain on your body. Unfortunately I meant your back eight more your feet started to swell and you were honestly very ready to be over with the pregnancy.

The doctor had told you to move around as much as he can’t to try and get labor to start the barista shoes and wanted you to rest and not push yourself more than you had to

Finally on a rainy night you started to have contractions! It was felt more like a cramp and lasted for about a minute or so, so it was still a bit early

Bruce was up right away and ready to go but you stopped him

“Labor can take hours hun, especially for a first baby. Let’s wait it out a little bit and we can get going alright?”

You were WAY TOO CALM in this situation. Bruce was baffled. But, he listened to you and instead had asked Alfred to have the bags and car on standby for when you were ready

Bruce was very supportive and attentive to your every need. He’d squeeze your hips, massage your back and anything else thay would sooth the contractions

“Just let me know and we’ll be at the hospital in no time” he would whisper to you as he rocked you side to side

Once it was time for you to get to the hospital, he made a phone call that you were on your way. Of course, he was never wanted to be seen as someone who abused his power or his name, but in your case, he only wanted you to have the highest of quality in things

So he made sure to book the hospital suite with only the best labor and delivery nurses of your choice.

Yes, he actually printed out the resumes of the nurses in the hospital and let you choose😭😭

This is Bruce Wayne. Batman. This man was the embodiment of fear some wood, even say that he did not know what fear was very different. In fact, he’s never felt more fear than he does now looking at you. He knew that this is a process. The millions of women go through but he still couldn’t help but feel like a child not know what to do.

You were squeezing his hand and your eyes were squeezed shut while you were trying to ride out this contraction. Sure he’s seeing you during your period, and how it was painful, but this was a whole other situation where the pain continue to escalate, and all he can do right now to see if you was to give you support

Once you arrived at the hospital Bruce help you out of the car by one of the nurses rolled out a wheelchair for you to sit in. He followed the nurse closely as he try to keep a close eye on you if his predictions were correct, you should be about 4 to 5 cm dilated

“ your doctor should come in a few minutes to check on your dilation. Please feel free to get comfortable and hit the call button if you need anything.” the young nurse informed you as she rolled get you into your room, and handing Bruce your hospital gown. As he helps you to get dress he also takes time to admire. Of course, it was always tractor for him, but he was also admiring all the hard work you have done in the past nine months.

“ do I really look that bad that you’re staring at me that much?” You asked him

“ no, not at all. In fact, far from it” he said, with a smile when you kiss your forehead. “I’m just admiring my work is all” he quips

“Ha ha mister slick- oh oh ahhh” you he’s in pain as you lean on your husband for support. It was basically like leaning on a brick wall.

“That’s in just breathe. You doing great.” he tries to comfort you to which you respond.

“ easy for you to say…..you don’t have a babies head prodding…..at your vagina” you breathe out between

“ fair enough, darling. You’re right, but I know that you really are strong and you’ll get through this. The contraction lasted for about two more minutes. After that you felt completely zapped from energy. Bruce helps you get into bed in a few minutes later your doctor walks in.

“ hello Mrs. Wayne how are we doing today? Are we ready to have a baby“ she asks trying to lift the mood give her a very pinned thumbs up, and she completely understood. “ All right I’m gonna give you a quick check just to see how far we are in dilation.” She says before checking and measuring “ looks like you’re about 6 cm just 4 more to go! Let me or the nurses know if you need anything else. She dismisses herself from the room.

“Only 6?” You groan “ and here I was thinking that I was around 8” you chuckle

“ well, you said it yourself, these things take time, especially if it’s a first“ he then comes and sits next to you on the bed and brings you into his arms. You can always sense whenever you needed “tell me what is on your mind“

“… because this entire time I was kind of in a trance about the pregnancy. I didn’t really take time to reflect on what’s really happening“ he knew you way too well for you to try and fake it and say you were fine. So you had just came out with it “when I felt the first contraction that’s when it honestly started hitting me that it was time….. and that it’s really happening” you admit

“Yeah it is…” he said still just listening

“I Just….feel overwhelmed” you sniff as your eyes well with tears “i don’t know what I’m doing or what’ll be good or bad for the baby”

“ well let’s look at it this way you do amazing boys. You force moves. Are you awesome like a mother would. That doesn’t excuse your feelings and fears about becoming because it’s something scary.” he comforts you “ but you’ll have me and the boys every step of the way”

For the rest of the night you were going through the motions of each contraction. Your doctor came in every hour or so to check on you. the boys even stopped by while they were in patrol for the night! They said once the baby was born they’d come back to visit again. You really appreciate them for coming by and seeing you, it made it just a bit more bearable. You had made it up until 3:26 am when it was time to finally push.

Bruce held your hand as you pushed with any energy you had left. You had always heard about women who explain the birth story and how it was the worst pain they had ever felt. It’s not that you didn’t believe them but now you can completely confirm what they were saying. This had to be the most intense pain that ever felt in your life. You didn’t know if you wanted to cling onto Bruce and have him comfort you or curse out for him doing this to you.

Either way, he would have taken it because he knows you are in a position he could never really experienced. But he tried his best to support and comfort you through the process.

“ That was a good one you’re doing great” he’d encourage you as he wiped your sweaty forehead. He may have looked very calm and collected, and so he was absolutely freaking out. You were in immense pain, and he can virtually do nothing about it. Here you were in front of him, sweaty screaming, and crying. All he was doing was feeding you ice, chips, and water, and letting you squeezes hands. Take me as you want.

“ you’re almost there. I know you feel tired, but you’re almost there. It’s almost over.” in fact, was speaking half truths because you truly do not know how much longer until your baby was in the world with you.

“ I know this is difficult, but I know you’re stronger than this. On the next count push with everything you have.” of course yes remember you were married to Batman meaning he was gonna push you until you were successful. Course in a loving way because he just wants. And in this case it’s for your health, and the babies health.

“Aaaahh!” You push again and fall back on your pillow panting

“Breath hon, breath. You’re doing good” he encouraged you.

It took you about an hour and a half from that first push to get her out. You don’t think you would experience anything like labor and delivery again. While it was something scary, painful, excruciating…… It also turned out to be something wonderful.

You were in Gotham’s best hospital with your newborn baby girl laying on your chest. She was only taken off to be cleaned and weighed. She passed all of the health tests with flying colors. And from what the nurses say, she is a perfect baby. Bruce, of course following in observing their every move.  he loves you so deeply and his love for you only grew more and now it is shared with the person that was made with that love. He really could not ask for more.

Bruce was absolutely gobsmacked. He didn’t know what to say or how to react he just felt this immense, warm happiness and relief in his chest.

“Look honey…we have a girl” you smiled tiredly “she’s so beautiful”

“She really is…you are incredible. I’m so proud of you.” He complimented you laying a soft kiss to your lips.

“Here, why don’t you hold her?” You said lifting up the tiny human for him to take a hold of. His large hands supported her tiny body. The same hands that were used to fight crime no carry the life that he had made with you out of love.

Funny enough, she had the pout you claimed he did and that Damien got from him. You know that he looked at it he has to agree she does have his pout. But it looked better on her than it did him. She was perfect. Especially her eyes. She has your beautiful Y/E/C eyes, his favorite thing to look at

“did you make up your mind on a name?” He asked as he sat in the chair next to your bed.

“Well i was thinking of one but I could decide if you would like it or not” you answer

“Anything you pick will be perfect”

“Well. I thought Ila (eye-la) would be nice”

“I agree it’s a very pretty name,” he agrees

“But.” You add “I want her to have a middle name”

“Ans that would be?”

“..Martha” you smile “Ila Marth Wayne”

“Y/N…really? He asked with wide eyes. You wanted your daughter to carry his mothers name?

“Of course hon. It’s the least I can do”

Bruce looked down into his hands and saw how the entire world and multiverse slept peacefully in his hands. His beautiful Ila.

She was another reason he caught and became better for create a better Gotham

~🐈‍⬛

[gavisuntiedboot]

Just Pretend (Gavi x reader)

Part 5

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Epilogue

Warnings: SMUT!! MDNI or if you're uncomfortable! Profanity!! Swearing!! Ferran and Martin (based on the reactions I think they deserve their own warning)!!

Word Count: 11.2K (fun fact! If you've read the whole story, you've read 46 pages!)

A/N: I'M SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG, BUT THERE'S A LOT I WANTED TO INCLUDE IN THIS PART (AS YOU CAN TELL BY THE WORD COUNT)

[Incoming Facetime call from: Gavi]

"Gavi, you're going to have to learn to live without seeing my face 24/7. I don't want you experiencing withdrawal symptoms while I sleep."

"I just had a question about- is that a jar of pickles?"

"Yes. I felt like having a snack."

"You're disgusting."

"Listen, I brought several things back from university life in America, and a pickle addiction was one of them. Let me have little joys in life. What did you call me for? Besides to shame me for my midnight guilty pleasures?"

This was the 7th time in two weeks that Gavi had Facetimed you at odd hours. After your little heart-to-heart while drunk in the club, and him covering for you at work the next morning, he caved into the impulsive thoughts and called you, wanting to make sure you were okay.

"Gavi it's 10pm. If you want me to help you hide a body, call me during working hours."

He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding at the sound of your voice. You were okay. Like actually okay. All of the distress in your voice, the shakiness, the panic - it had all disappeared. You were back to your cool self, and it filled him with a warm and gooey sense of relief. He kept you on the phone for about 10 minutes before his internal monologue told him it was enough, and he went to bed with a strange tightness in his chest.

For the first three weeks, it had been strictly texts and phone calls. Gavi was still sending you his daily little updates, some relevant, most not.

[Gavi]: Compression socks are really tight on my shins. Feels like they're cutting off my blood flow.

[Gavi]: pedri keeps telling me to eat bananas to help with my back cramps. Fact or cap?

[Gavi]: saw someone on tiktok make a Joao Felix thirst trap. Anything you want to confess?

This texting remained constant, and then he supplemented with phone calls. After the check-up call, he had to find new excuses to call you. He started scheduling his early-morning sessions over the phone instead of over text, asking about your life in the meantime. He started "forgetting" things in your office, calling to tell you he would be there before practice to pick them up. It hadn't annoyed you, per se, but confused you. Why was Gavi so comfortable calling you and just talking about random things on the phone? Initially, you had joked with him to stop calling you so frequently.

"Gavi, personal number. Personal. You should keep all work related stuff to emails only. I don't get paid to listen to you ramble about Game of Thrones."

"I know you well enough by now to know that if you didn't want to hear my voice, you would hang up."

He wasn't exactly wrong. You were not one to shy away from hanging up in someone's face if you were irritated (you had done it to Ferran the one time he called you from Gavi's phone). You also didn't really have anyone else to talk to. Angelika, despite acting unemployed, worked for a design house in the city, and her designs had been approved as part of the new line. She now spent every waking moment working on the spring/summer collection that needed to be shown in February. She had even stopped bugging you to go to the club. The only times you heard from her were when she sent "Hey I'm alive just busy" texts, or on the weekends when she begged you to drive her to the far fabric stores. There weren't many other people that you wanted to talk to. Your friends in the US were several hours behind. Your friends in Barcelona were kind of exhausting, and not who you wanted to hear from after a long day of work. And Martin?

Martin was ... interesting. You definitely liked being with him in person. Your dinners were romantic. Martin always picked you up and took you to the nicest restaurant, allowing you to order the expensive plates that would actually make you full. He always complimented your dress and your eyes and the way you looked despite having a long day at work. He was a theoretical great boyfriend. You liked going out with him every 3-4 days. You liked getting good morning and good night texts and the hot pre-game selfies whenever you checked your phone between shifts at work. But in those late nights when you were bored and lonely, and your TV shows were all boring you, Martin was not the first person you thought of calling.

While he was great over dinner, he wasn't the most entertaining or comforting presence. He had a habit of downplaying a lot of the things you were feeling or going through.

"Baby, people make sexual comments all the time. Just look at how people on Twitter talk about the players. You should be more flattered than anything that he complimented your ass."

That was the last time you ever called him after a long and tiring day of work. Your text messages were filled with only pleasant conversations. A good goal he scored in practice. Praise you received from the rest of the medical staff for your progress. Never your frustration with your job or your life or the sad boring things that regular, not famous not football players went through.

"It's like 7pm this is not a midnight snack."

The sound of Gavi's voice brought you back from your abstract thoughts. You looked at his face lit up on the screen. His hair was a little wild and still slightly damp from his shower. He was in a white t-shirt that hugged his shoulders. He placed his phone down so that he could show you his complaint.

"Remember how we were talking about my knee and thigh tightness? I've been trying to work out the muscle for a while but it's not helping."

He moved back from the camera, letting his black gym shorts and legs come in to the frame. He lifted his left short leg, showing off the pronounced muscles in his thigh. You brought the phone a little closer to your face, focusing on his leg. He flexed the muscle, and you swallowed hard. You had seen some of the best legs in football laying in front of you - so why was Gavi's slightly blurry form on FaceTime overwhelming you?

"Have you been doing the routine I gave you to improve blood flow? It looks like you haven't."

"It's hard to do! I tried multiple times and I'm just in pain every time. We just have a match tomorrow and like it's kind of uncomfortable. It's fine I can just play through it if you don't have any other recommendations."

This made you sit up. If there was one thing that would get both of you in deep shit, it was Gavi playing through a known and documented discomfort.

"You're not going to do that. If you get injured during the match then I-"

"Awe doctora, you're concerned about me getting injured?"

He got up close to the camera, smiling cheekily and feigning shyness. You rolled your eyes.

"If you get injured in the match I will get in trouble because your muscle tightness is in your file. So you have two options: do the blood flow massage I told you to, or I need to email Xavi now and tell him you should be playing a maximum of 60 minutes in tomorrow's match."

This statement made Gavi sober up, looking instantly more serious.

"We're not telling Mister Xavi anything. I actually don't know how to do the blood flow stuff without feeling like I'm peeling off my own skin."

"Would it kill you not to play all 90 minutes tomorrow?"

"Yes." There was not one indication, neither in his tone or on his face, that he was kidding. Gavi's love for football was evident, but it was deeper than most people saw. Barca wasn't just his club - it was the air he breathed, the blood in his veins. It was his family, his brotherhood since he was a child. It was the greatest love he had ever experienced, and he was honestly willing to lay his life down if it meant making Mister and the boys proud. He would die for this club.

"You know what doctora? You can just do it for me tomorrow morning before the match."

"You can't play right after we literally batter your muscles to increase blood flow. You have to do it within the next few hours to have enough time to rest. I wish you told me this morning, I could have..." Your sentence trailed as you looked at your front door. Your car keys were sitting in the dish. You had been thinking about going out to get some dinner, too tired to wait for chicken to defrost.

"Hello? Can you focus on the crisis at hand instead of daydreaming?"

"What if I came over and did it for you now?"

Gavi's eyes got wide and he stared at his screen. He was trying to process the information that had just slithered into his brain. You? At his house? At night? Alone???

"Wait." He said, and then hung up the call. You looked at your screen in confusion.

He stabilized his hands enough to find the contact.

*Calling: ~banana king pepi~ *

"Pick up pick up pick up pick up-"

"Hello?"

"Help. Me."

Pedri paused his game, much to the dismay of his brother, who was about to score a virtual goal.

"Pablo I know you didn't go to regular school, but you should know that in an emergency you should call the police."

"Y/n asked to come to my house."

Pedri bit back a laugh, removing the controller from his lap and putting the call on speaker so Fernando could be a part of the drama.

"You finally confessed that you're in love with her and want to kick her boyfriend's teeth in?"

"I'm not in love with her, we're just friends. That second part you might be right about." Gavi summarized your reasons for coming over quickly, asking Pedri for some sage advice while he and Fer raised their eyebrows at each other in amusement.

"As long as you have condoms, invite her over Hermano."

"I don't like her like that."

"Then why are you nervous about her coming to your place?" That was a good question. He didn't know why the idea of seeing you outside of work put all his internal systems on high alert, but it did. His hands were sweating at the prospect of opening the door and seeing you standing there in something other than scrubs.

"I'm not. I'm just going to tell her to come over. No need to make a big deal about it."

"Have fun Pablito." Fernando chimed in. Gavi scoffed and hung up. He called you once again.

"Where did you go?"

"Pedri called me to make sure we were going to the stadium together tomorrow. So, are you going to come here?"

"You never gave me an address. Or a yes for that matter." You laughed out. Your heart beat began to pick up. Did Gavi not want you at his place? Did he have another girl there? 'Why would he be calling you if another girl was there?' I don't know, brain, men are weird.

"Oh. Yeah. Yes. To coming over. I want you to. I'll text you the address right now." Something in your chest tightened at this statement. Your phone dinged, and you looked at the address Gavi had sent you.

"Cool. I'll be there in 20."

The drive to Gavi's place was calm. Old One Direction played over your car's aging speakers. The chilly night air came through the rolled down windows, winter finally making its first appearances in the middle of November. As you got closer to your destination, the surroundings started to look familiar.

Gavi was looking at the street from the window of his bedroom. In his La Masia shirt and black shorts, he had perched for all 18 minutes that it took you to drive over, right after he tidied the house. He didn't want you to think he was a teenage slob. If Gavi really thought about it, he would have admitted: all he wanted was for you to respect him - see him as a man. Someone put together and capable.

You parked at the bottom of his building, texting that you had arrived. He tried not to, but he ran down the whole staircase, swinging the door open before you had gotten out of the car.

"Hey. You know you live like walking distance from Martin?" You said, approaching the front door. Gavi's face soured at this news. He was never subtle about his distaste for Martin. After that night at the club, he had made it very obvious that he thought you should break up with Martin, or at least give him a stern talking to for leaving you to stumble around drunk and alone - especially since he was the one forcing drinks on you.

"Wonderful. I'll make sure to go and give him a nice neighborly gift."

"Like what? A black eye?"

"I was just thinking of pissing in his bushes but now that you mention it I really do think "bruised" is a good look on him..." He lifted his hand to his chin to look like he was thinking. You shoved him off balance, walking towards the door.

"Lets go, Gavi. I get cranky if I don't get all my beauty sleep."

He walked into the house first, holding the door open for you. You were honestly impressed: the place did not look like a teenager's house. The bottom floor was a spacious living room and dining room, with the kitchen connected by a low wall. The tan walls had vintage Barca and Spain National Team posters hung on them. There was a large TV mounted on the wall, a PS5 placed on the shelf beneath it, a pile of games stacked high. His couch was a long L shape. black leather wrapping around a black coffee table.

"You have a Barca coffee table book?" You asked, giggling slightly as you picked up the massive picture book.

"I've been with the club since I was like 11. Everything I own I have it in Barca colors."

You looked over at the stairs and the soft glow from the top of them. Something in you was dying to know what Gavi's bedroom looked like. How many hoodies he owned, what color his sheets were, how many pillows he slept on...

You shook yourself from this line of thinking. Despite the two of you getting closer and friendlier, Gavi was still technically just your coworker. You shouldn't want to know all these things about him.

"Ok where is the stone I gave you?" You put your hand out expectantly, and he dropped the black massage gua sha in it. Gavi moved to lay on the couch, mimicking what he would do in your office.

"Before you sit down, what have you been using as lubricant?"

He snapped his head at you, cheeks and the tips of his ears turning pink.

"I, I, um, lub- why do you need to know what kind of lubricant I use? That's a really personal question?"

You stared at him in confusion, wondering why he had gotten shy and stuttery at the question.

"So I can use that lubricant on you now?" He stood up, swallowing hard. He took several deep breaths before saying:

"y/n, I didn't invite you here to do anything sexual. If this is a joke that Pedri asked you to play it's-"

"Pablo you brainless bitch. I meant what have you been using as massage lubricant, because you're not supposed to scrape the stone across your dry skin."

You both stared at each other for a long moment. You had one brow raised, smirk playing on your lips. You were holding back a laugh at the thought: Gavi was thinking you wanted to know what he used to jerk off. Or sleep with someone. That second thought made you slightly nauseous. Gavi's eyes were wide, his mouth still open in shock. You had the courage to speak first.

"I see that the reason you have been feeling pain is because you have been giving yourself microabruises. Go get some oil or lotion so I can do this for you, and I expect my gas money in full tomorrow on my desk."

"Can you, uh, turn around?"

"Why?"

"I don't... I don't want you seeing where I got the lotion from."

"See now Pablo, if you had just gone upstairs, I would have thought it was from the cabinet or the bathroom. But since you've made it weird, you've confirmed that it's from your bedside table. Just go before you make this situation more sexually awkward."

“No but I-“

You held up one finger to your lips to silence him, then pointed in the direction of the stairs. He shuffled past you awkwardly and then took off, taking the stairs two at a time. You laughed to yourself. It was always funny seeing glimpses of innocence and youth in Gavi, especially since he was always pushing himself to act older and more mature.

Pablo was not having a good time. He ran to his bathroom to splash cold water on his now violently blushing face. He thought you would be able to see the mess of clothes in his bedroom if he opened the door. Now the conversation had shifted into an oddly sexual realm, and he didn’t know how to deal. The idea of sex didn’t usually embarrass him - it bothered him when the guys would talk about nothing else, but he thought he had finally reached a level of maturity where he could say “pussy” and not giggle. So why was he so damn shy right now? Why was he embarrassed to his core that you had mentioned him jerking off?

Pablo would describe his masturbatory habits as efficient. Once he and his teammates at La Masía turned 14, the medical staff had all sat them down for “the talk”. Obviously there was the parental stuff about safe sex and all that, but from a sports aspect he knew: sexual frustration is bad for performance. So a couple nights a week he would rub one out hoping to ensure optimal performance. Lately, however, he has lessened his “alone time” significantly. Since Ferran had shown him that picture of you, since he started daydreaming about holding your hand, the feel of your skin, he was borderline afraid to jerk off. He didn’t want to see your face. Coming to terms with the fact that he liked your company was already too overwhelming. Pablo was convinced this was a waiting game: you were just new and exciting. Eventually he would see another picture of another girl, and you would go back to “that one girl physio”, and he could jerk in peace.

He came back downstairs, sheepishly handing you a tube of lotion, and then quickly laying on the couch, hoping to avoid your line of sight.

“Lotion for Men? Gavi, you know that your skin won’t melt off it the product doesn’t say ‘for men’ right?”

“We had a media intern last year that saw a tube of strawberry chapstick in my bag, and she sent the picture to 3 or 4 gossip instagram pages, saying ‘look! Stuff for women! Gavi has a girlfriend!’ So now I only use stuff that can’t be mistaken as something for my nonexistent girlfriend.”

“What if they think you have a boyfriend instead?”

“That might be ideal actually. Then maybe I could go home without being mobbed.”

You smiled at Gavi, who was now more relaxed and far less red. His arms were crossed behind his head, legs stretched out and shorts rolled up slightly so you could access the upper parts of his thighs. You placed some lotion on his legs and began rubbing it in.

“Wow. Does the rest of the team know you offer private massage services?” He asked, resting his head and looking up at the ceiling.

“Obviously not. You think Ferran would ever leave me alone if he knew this was an option?”

Gavi laughed loudly at this. Watching you reject and diss Ferran on an almost daily basis was the highlight of training. Sometimes your responses were so creative that he would run to write them down before the end of the break. His personal favorite was when Ferran asked when you two were finally going to go on a date, and you replied with ‘After my lobotomy next week so my brain is immune to mind numbing conversation with you’.

But as he looked down at you, Pablo noticed that your face was twisted in distain. You began moving the stone around his thighs, working in sweeping downward motions. The frown lines etched hard into your skin, eyes narrowed in concentration and slight disgust.

“Does Ferran make you uncomfortable?”

“It’s nothing I can’t handle.”

“So the answer is yes he does.” Gavi’s voice was lowering with genuine concern. He and the team, the coaches, and even the rest of the physical staff only really laughed at or brushed off your daily interactions with the player. He hadn’t realized how deeply the comments were bothering you. But now it was evident as you swallowed and started working his thigh a little harder.

“I don’t want to speak ill of your friend.”

“If he’s bothering you, you should have told me. Or someone else on the team. We could have made him stop.”

“But why wasn’t me telling him I didn’t like it enough to make him stop?”

You pressed harder into Gavi now, stone running alone the muscles in his calf. You should have been using a lighter hand, but emotion you had been suppressing for months was all bubbling to the surface.

“You’re going kind of hard on my leg…”

“Why does it have to be you or Xavi or Dr. Gonzalez? Why do my words hold so little weight? So little value?”

“Okay this is painful now-“

“Why does it have to be one of you to say ‘hey, you shouldn’t make sexual remarks to someone on staff’? You think he tells anyone else their ass looks good in scrubs? Or that he’s glad their office has a door with a lock? No. It’s just me. Because I’m a girl he can talk about fucking me in broad daylight around the whole squad, and I have to shut up and keep him happy or I lose my job. It’s just so-“

“Ay fuck y/n!” Gavi yelled out, grabbing your wrist and tugging it forcefully to get you to stop your abuse on his leg. You grabbed his other thigh with your free hand, digging your fingers into the flesh. He looked you in the eyes, and finally noticed the tears starting to form.

“I know how you feel.”

"No you fucking don't, Pablo!" You yelled back, hand digging into his thigh, the other still in his grasp. This is when the first tear finally fell. I had been weighing on you for weeks - the slow realization that you were never going to respected in the way you deserved. A part of you knew that Martin was contributing to this burden as well. The arch of his brow when you talked about sports medicine terms, the mocking smile that played on his lips. The way he had adopted Ferran's disgusting little pet name of 'nurse'. You were disintegrating from the inside, and knowing that the others thought it was a joke, that Pablo thought it was a joke, was the final straw.

Gavi could do nothing but stare. His eyes softened, taking in your slumped form. It was like watching Hercules fall to his knees. Like watch the stars were falling from the sky and hitting the Earth in a fiery blaze. Watching you, who was normally so cool, so confident, so self assured, shake with silent tears was breaking something in Gavi. The way you said his name made his heart physically ache. You rarely diverted from his nickname to use his first name. 'When you did, it usually indicated a serious tone 'Pablo' meant there was something serious, something heavy. Now that heaviness was against your throat, suffocating you, and you were tired of carrying it.

Gavi stopped thinking. He acted on impulse only. He tugged the wrist that was in his hand, pulling you in. Your head met with his hard chest, and you felt one arm circle your shoulder. You remained like this for a long moment: up against Gavi, his arm pressing you into his chest, his shirt soaking up the wetness on your cheeks.

"'m sorry. I wont let him talk to you that way anymore."

You composed yourself, pushing yourself off Gavi and wiping your eyes. You looked away, embarrassed that you'd made him comfort you - that you'd broken down in front of him.

"It's okay. I can deal with Ferran."

"But you shouldn't have to."

"It's not your job to protect me, Pablo."

You finished the rest of your job in silence. Your fingers moved expertly around his skin, working out the muscle and pressing into his flesh, a soft gasp or hiss from Gavi being the only sound to fill the room. Your anger was irrational, but you couldn't quell it. You had gotten this far in life without the protection or defense of anyone, and you weren't prepared to be coddled now. You finished quickly, wiping your hands on your pant legs and moving to grab your bag.

"I'm going to go now. Get some sleep for tomorrow's match against Betis. Good night." You tried to walk past Gavi without looking up, but he blocked your path.

"You're in my way."

"You're not leaving while you're upset."

"You want me to stop being upset? Stop pretending you give a shit about my feelings. You want to look like a man? Telling off Ferran so people think you're a good person?" You shoved past Gavi once again, and once again he moved in front of you, blocking the door completely.

"Just because you're older than me doesn't mean I'll let you disrespect me in my own house. I'm not pretending to give a shit. I do give about your comfort and your feelings because last I check, we're friends. I've been waiting to break Ferran's shins for weeks, I've just been waiting for you to say so."

"You think it would make me feel better for you to hurt a teammate? Could you be any more juvenile?"

Gavi took a step towards you, arms crossed over his chest, breathing more heavy. He looked you straight in the eye, not allowing you to break from the gaze.

"You can yell at me all you want. You can be angry at the fact that I care about you. You can punch me," he hit on his chest, "right here if you want to. But I am not a child. Don't refer to me as one. So you can go an be upset and pretend that everything I do is selfish, but you know deep down that no matter how much you push me away, I'm looking out for your best interest." He opened the door and stepped aside.

"Drive safely, doctora."

You walked to your car, turning to gaze at Gavi, who leaned against the door frame, watching you intently. You were the most confusing person he had ever met. You were stubborn and easily irritated. You refused to accept help. You were fucking frustrating. But as he watched you walk to your car, something warm filled his body. He didn't want you to leave. He wanted to rush after you, pull you into his chest again, and take you upstairs. He wanted you to see the mess in his bedroom. He wanted you to lay on the couch. And the drive didn't feel like you were going home. It felt like you had left something important behind.

~

The next morning you were up before your alarm. You couldn't find sleep or peace. Your words to Gavi had eaten you alive all through the night. You knew you had been too harsh, projected too far onto him, but you hadn't been thinking straight. It hurt differently to think that he was laughing at your expense. The guilt followed you around all morning as you prepared yourself for the match. You slicked back your hair, pulling it away from your face, and dressed in the slacks and pullover that all the field medics were regulated to wear. But as you sipped your lukewarm coffee, the guilt still sat in your stomach, swirling and festering and making you nauseous. So you swallowed your pride with your last sip of coffee and pressed the call button.

"Uh, hello? Am I late?" Gavi's voice asked, raspy and dripping with the remnants of sleep. He sounded like a child who was woken up for school.

"Oh no, you're not late. I'm up early... couldn't sleep."

"Why not?" Gavi was now fully awake after processing that you had called him. His heartrate elevated slowly, the sound of your voice helping the tiredness slip away from his very being.

"I... I feel guilty about yesterday. I shouldn't have taken out all my anger on you and your thigh tissue. I really appreciate you looking out for me. I guess I just wanted to say I'm sorry."

Gavi was leaning against his sink, swaying back and forth and smiling stupidly. You were thinking about him. You appreciated him. It made him swell with pride. He listened intently to the rest of your apology, hypnotized by the sound of your voice.

"There's no need to apologize doctora. I understand that you were upset."

"But I still feel bad. I was.. pretty mean to you yesterday. I want to make sure that you're not still upset with me."

Gavi looked into the mirror, smiling and dancing at your response.

"If you really want to make it up to me, I would like to cash in my favor."

You were in the process of grabbing your keys when you paused, eyebrows pulled together in confusion.

"Favor? I don't remember owing you any favors."

"La doctora, you don't remember? Let me refresh your memory. You go home drunk and don't set an alarm. I come up with a wonderful and convincing excuse for Dr. G so that you don't get in trouble. You owe me, and I quote, anything I want. Ring any bells?"

You scrunched your face and groaned in distain. You remembered rather vividly now the promise you had made.

"Alright Gavi, hit me with it. I can take it. How am I repaying you saving my job?" You heard a low chuckle from the other side of the line.

"You'll be driving me home from the stadium starting today until we break for Christmas."

"What?!"

"You'll be driving me home. Pedri is working with Adidas for several campaigns over the next month, and it'll be a pain getting home after practice. Since you know the way now, you can get there easily. And hey, you can even visit Martin afterwards."

You started your car, thinking about the ask. It was on your way home anyways to drive by Gavi's neighborhood. And it would probably make you both even after your missteps.

"Fine. We will discuss further in the stadium when I see you. Go go, prep for the match. I want us to win today."

"We are going to win for sure. Give us a harder goal."

"Don't be arrogant Gavi. See you at noon."

~

Matchday at the camp was always extremely hectic, but especially for the medical staff. Meetings started at 9am despite the game not beginning until 3pm. All the equipment had to be approved by La Liga through inspection. Your wardrobe was inspected as well, and once again you were told off for not removing your rings. You pulled them off your fingers begrudgingly, hearing once again the lecture about rings tearing gloves. You were already over the match by the time the players started to arrive.

You made your way to the locker room to do some checks on players with pre-listed discomforts, making suggestions to prevent injury during the game. You were greeted warmly by the players as you pulled out your clipboard and pen. You made your way around, telling certain players to wear compression socks, and instructing others to stretch in certain ways. You made your way over to Pedri and Gavi, pulling out your notes.

"Pedri, how is that right thigh?"

"Amazing, y/n. I've been using resistance bands nightly like you instructed. I feel as flexible as playdoh."

"Always great to hear. Also congrats about the expanded Adidas contract." Pedri lifted his shirt over his head and looked at you somewhat confused.

"Ah thank you but... which contract specifically?"

Gavi's eyes were wide in panic. He had forgotten to fill in Pedri about his little white lie. It was true that Pedri had some filming with Adidas, but it would take about 3 days max. There was no reason that Gavi could pinpoint that would make him lie to get you to drive him home for 4 weeks. But he did it anyways, and now he needed to make sure it didn't collapse because of a lapse in communication.

"Gavi told me you'd be filming with Adidas, so I'll be driving him home until the Christmas break."

Pedri shot a look to the younger boy, one eyebrow arched, and found the expression of desperation on his face. The smile crept onto Pedri's face, proud of his friend for finally making some sort of move with you, even if he was yet to admit it was made because of the crush he was harboring.

"Oh that's right! They have us filming a lot of content at night to show off the color of these new boots, so it's really helpful that you'll be taking little Gavi home."

The sigh of relief was almost a little too loud. Gavi would fill Pedri in later, but for now, he was glad that he hadn't been caught in the lie.

"Anytime. Now onto little Gavi himself - how is the thigh tension?" You worked on Gavi, evaluating his physical form.

"I didn't know the nurse was making house visits today!"

Your jaw clenched and eye twitched at the sound of Ferran's voice. You took a deep breath, calming your nerves, and continued to check for signs of bruising and distress, crouched close to the ground to inspect Gavi's thighs.

"Wow Pablito, got her on her knees for you? You'll have to tell me the secret."

"Ferran, you couldn't get a dog to love you if you were covered in bacon. Be quiet and get changed so you can sit on the bench for 90 minutes."

You looked up at Gavi, shocked at his response. You squeezed his thigh, causing him to meet your concerned gaze.

"Gavi, tell me to shut up again and you'll be preparing for a prolonged hospital stay."

"I'd like to see you fucking try, Torres." Gavi moved from his place, approaching Ferran, before a hand from Pedri gripped his shoulder. One of the assistant coaches noticed the argument and rushed over, eager to prevent his players from killing each other.

"What the hell is going on?"

Ferran looked at Gavi with disgust, and then turned his eyes to rest on your chest.

"I think y/n is creating an uncomfortable environment in the locker room. I'd prefer if she wasn't here." He said, smirk playing on his lips. Your face paled, the colors draining and nausea bubbling. The last thing you needed was a complaint from a player.

"She wasn't doing anything except looking at my leg. She didn't even speak." Gavi responded, voice high and a touch too loud to be respectful.

"y/n, it may be better if you leave for field inspection. Send in Antonio to continue current problem rounds."

You nodded and walked out of the locker room, feeling utterly embarrassed. All you ever wanted was to make a good impression and be respected, and it seemed that no one paid your wellbeing any mind. You bit back your feelings and went to find Antonio. Gavi was not as merciful.

"What mental deficiencies do you suffer from that would make you say that? What if she loses her job?"

"She won't lose her job. She'll get a warning because of player complaints, and then she'll come to me and do whatever I ask to get the complaint removed. Just want to watch her bend over that desk just once before they realize she's incompetent."

"Say nasty shit about y/n in front of me again and I'll kick your fucking teeth in."

Ferran wanted to laugh, but the sound died in his throat when he saw the look in Gavi's eyes. His eyes were angry, cold-blooded, and murderous.

"You wouldn't dare." He retorted, trying to regain some confidence by calling the bluff.

"We play football for a living. I can make it look like a fucking accident." With that, Gavi left the locker room, ready to be away from Ferran and his punchable face.

~

Normally, you loved being on the sidelines for matches. You got to watch all the action as it occurred, and you got hands-on experience with the Barca players and the visiting teams (maybe it was bad, but you prayed Joao would need medical attention when Atletico was at Camp Nou). You got to enjoy every aspect of your job, and feel like you had come a significant way in your journey. Normally. Today, you wish you were at home or in your office or anywhere but the sidelines. Word had gotten back to both the coaching staff and the rest of the team about the little disagreement in the locker room, and now all eyes were on you. Xavi gave you the normal courtesy head nod, but gave you specific instructions to stay away from the bench and the players. It was a mortifying experience, and you prayed this game would end quickly and painlessly.

Your wish was granted in the first half. The team was playing cohesively and relatively safely, with a couple fouls here and there but no injuries requiring any attention. Lewandowsky scored a goal in the 34th minute, putting the team in the lead 1-0 at the half (during which, you were asked not to be in the locker room or the tunnel). This only made you feel worse. Player complaint were the kiss of death for any aspiring professionals in sports. You get into a disagreement with a player? You're gone. Why? Because there are thousands of physios and photographers and water boys, but only onw left forward worth 48 million Euros.

In the second half, however, you did not get your wish. Areal collisions came one after the other, requiring you to rapidly check players for any sort of head trauma. In the 67th minute, Gavi assisted Pedri with an amazing goal from deep in the box. You jumped when you saw the ball hit the back of the net. Pedri did his signature goal celebrations, and after he pulled away, your eyes locked with Gavi. He raised his eyebrows at you and you returned the gesture, and then he resumed the aggressive attacking. At minute 70, you were contemplating packing your things. The intensity of the match had died down significantly. Barca were passively looking for a third goal, and were not as prone to injury. This all changed in minute 72, when the midfielder decided he hated Gavi. Dribbling with the ball, Gavi was trying to turn to give him more options to pass or dribble, but he was surrounded by three people. As he tried to break free, the Betis player's knee collided with Gavi's groin. Hard.

The sound of the collision and then the fall to the ground sounded like it was heard in the entirety of the stadium. Your jaw went slack and eyes went wide. Gavi was on the floor, unmoving. You didn't even think, using enough brain power to grab the medical bag at your side, and then sprinted across the field to Gavi. There was a crowd of players surrounding him now, creating a tight ring of people. You approached the group, placing your hands on the nearest person, and then shoving.

"GET OUT OF THE WAY! MEDIC! MOVE!"

You finally go the bodies to disperse, and laying there was Gavi, tears in his eyes and whimpering from pain. He had one arm slung over his face, and the other gripped his shirt in immense pain. When he saw you approach, he looked at you with pleading eyes, begging for anything that would stop the throbbing pain he was experiencing.

"Gavi, where did you get kneed exactly? Where is the most intense pain?" You asked, kneeling to the ground and pulling on your gloved.

"My... my dick. I got kneed in the dick and it feels like hell." He replied. He was in too much pain to be shy. His dick fucking hurt, and he wanted anything to soothe the pain as quickly as possible.

"Gavi, I'm going to touch you now, okay?" You asked, hand hovering over the area. He nodded, not fully processing what you were saying or what was happening. You placed your hand over his dick and his eyes shot open. You began to massage the area slightly, moving your hand around, trying to prevent receptors of pain from activating and working to increase blood flow to the area.

And increase blood flow you did. Gavi felt the blood begin to pool in his shorts, and now that the pain was subsiding the embarrassment was returning, he took in what was actually happening. You had one hand on his cock and balls, moving them around slowly, and one on his hip, making sure the area wasn't sensitive. You looked up at Gavi, who was still in somewhat intense pain.

"Here, give me your hand." You placed your hand atop his, guiding it to his injury.

"Keep moving your hand around where you got kneed, and we'll get you on the bench. I would give you ice but I don't think that's idea here. Can you walk alone?" Gavi nodded, and you and the medical staff cleared the field. Gavi walked to the bench himself, earning cheers and love from all the fans in the stadium. He sat on the bench, continuing to massage his bruised genitals, and trying to make his blush subside by the end of the match.

~

After a stunning 3-0 win, you were ready to go to bed and never wake up again. Your whole body ached, and you had gotten dizzy from the sun exposure mixed with the biting chill of late November. You were barely able to drag your body to the players area - which you still could not enter. You received an email on your phone saying that Dr. Gonzalez would speak to you personally regarding the player complaint. Just as you were ready to burst into tears, Gavi emerged from the locker room, Pedri trailing close behind.

"Enjoy the game today?" Pedri asked, pulling you out of your trance.

"Loved it. I just wish Gavi could stop running into people so I could have a better viewing experience."

Gavi took this as an opportunity to enter the discussion, groaning on about how the other teams bullied him and were extra tough on him as the three of you walked to the garage.

"See you tomorrow, Pedri." You waved, unlocking your car and climbing into the driver's seat. He waived at you, and approached Gavi to hug him goodbye. As he pulled the younger boy in he whispered in his ear.

"I don't know how you thought of this little lie, but now you're going to be alone with her every day for four weeks. Ready to admit that you like her?" Gavi let out a fake laugh, playfully slapping Pedri on the shoulder.

"I don't like her like that. I just want to relieve some burden off of you, Hermano."

"Mhm yeah I'm sure. Just try not to get hard watching her drive on your first ride home. Wait until day 4 or 5." With that, Pedri walked to his own car, getting ready to call Fernando and update him about the circus that was Pablo's love life, and enjoying only being mobbed by 1/2 the normal amount of fans.

Gavi walked to your car quickly, climbing in and tossing his bag in the back. He tried not to think about Pedri's words. He was perfectly capable of sitting next to you, his friend, without being aroused just because you were a girl. At least he hoped he was. He was not hunched over and thinking deeply. Why did he decide that this was the best way for you to repay him? It's not like Pedri had ever complained about chauffeuring him around. And it's not like he didn't enjoy rides home with Pedri, listening to Quevedo and making idle conversation. But lately he just wanted to be around you - make sure you were okay.

The ring of your phone broke Gavi's train of thought. You answered on your car's speaker.

"Hola Martin. How are you doing?"

The sound of Martin's voice twisted Gavi's intestines, making him nauseous and fatigued. He hated the sound of his voice, the thought of his face, the words that he strung together and decided to say to you.

"Hola sexy. How are you doing this evening?"

You rolled your eyes. You knew exactly why Martin had chosen to call at this time. You had texted him earlier in the day, asking if he would be home that evening so you could drop by. This had led to a brief inquisition, with Martin wondering why you wanted to see him suddenly, and why you would be in his neighborhood. Once he found out it was because you would be in a car with Gavi alone, something in his behavior switched. He suddenly wanted to be a doting boyfriend who called and checked up on you.

"I'm doing well. You're on speaker in the car. I'm driving Gavi home right now."

"Are you still coming over afterwards? I've missed you so bad." Martin whined out that last part in such an animated way that it made you want to laugh. You knew what he was doing. He wanted to assert his dominance over Gavi, and make it think that you were going to swiftly go get railed by Martin right after you delivered Gavi at his doorstep. the truth was, despite dating Martin for several months now, you two had yet to go all the way. There had of course been kissing and some heavy petting, but no articles of clothing had never his the floor.

"I'll see how I'm feeling after Gavi leaves and call you then. Bye Martin." You said quickly, hanging up the call once you took a quick look at the disgusted look Gavi had plastered on.

"I'd mock you if I didn't think I would throw up." He said, trying to be lighthearted but failing. You didn't reply, feeling slightly embarrassed that he had to listen to your boyfriend's weak attempts to prove his manliness.

"No it's okay, go ahead and mock my boyfriend who moans on the phone when other people can hear." Your laugh was also stiff and forced. The call had made the air thicker and the mood more tense. You handed Gavi the phone, instructing him to play some music so that you weren't sat in the awkward silence that Martin seemed to always create between the two of you.

"This is a lot of pressure now on me. I'm never on AUX." He says, scrolling through his music. He pressed the song, and the sound poured from the speakers.

"Enrique Iglesias? Isn't he before your time?" You asked, smiling from ear to ear. You loved Cuando Me Enamoro, and the familiarity helped release the tension from your shoulders. As the song played, you started softly singing along. You opened the cover of the moon roof, allowing more of the street light to enter the car.

Gavi turned to look at you, examining your features. Your eyes were soft, focused on the road ahead of you. Your fingers drummed against the steering wheel to the beat. You had one leg up as you drove, leaning into the door slightly. Your lips moved along with the lyrics, singing contently. Gavi could not move his eyes from the sight. Your lips forming every letter were drawing in his focus, hypnotizing him. He never wanted to look away from the soft pink flesh. His thoughts began escaping his control. He wanted to hear you sing louder. He wanted to hear you speak, watching those lips talk about anything your heart held a passion for. He wondered what they would feel like against the pads of his fingers. He imagined what it would be like to kiss them - softly at first, just to feel their warmth and softness. Then harder, to interlock with his own, to bite them, pull them, have them stretched around him, make them cry out his name.

"Pablo?"

He snapped up, giving himself whiplash. Gavi had not noticed that he had rested himself on the center console, leaning against his palm and daydreaming so deeply it drowned out the sound of your voice calling his name.

"Sorry to disturb your deep pondering, but we're here." He looked up at you, vision still rose tinted from the deep dive he had conducted on your lips. His mouth hung open, wanting to say something, but the words would not form in his head. He wanted to touch you. He wanted you to be closer. But he couldn't say it. So instead he extended his hand for a fist bump, coupled with a quick mutter of 'goodnight'. He grabbed his bag, quickly closing the door and digging for his keys.

"Gavi?"

He looked back at you. Your eyes locked for a moment. His hazel eyes conveyed an emotion that you couldn't understand. You didn't want to look away from him.

"I'll see you tomorrow, right?" There was a plead in the question that didn't escape either of you. It was a request. You wanted to see him. His eyes softened, crinkling at the sides as a smile spread across his space.

"Of course, doctora. Drive safe, and let me know when you get home."

Your eyes remained locked until Gavi shut his front door. He leaned against it breathing deeply, as you leaned your head against your steering wheel. You both felt a deep longing for the other, the feeling of "I miss you" sinking in as soon as the door clicked. But he got off the door, and you turned your engine back on, and you both ignored the feeling that something was missing.

~

Gavi was proud of himself. He was only half hard after leaving the car, despite the most sinful and inappropriate thoughts about your lips festering in his mind. He tried to eat, but he had no appetite. All he wanted to do was call you, text you, read your old messages. He threw his phone on his bed. He didn't understand why you now took up so much of his headspace and thought. He went to shower for the third time that day, hoping to relieve the tension permanently etched into his limbs.

You knocked on Martin's door for a third time. You had called him from Gavi's to let him know you were coming. He answered the phone out of breath and rushed, telling you to just come over, and hanging up quickly. It was night and day from the concerned lover that had called earlier. On the drive over you rationalized his behavior. Did you really have time for a boyfriend that wanted to talk to you often and be with you and have sex and sleepovers? No. You were busy and focused on advancing your career. So maybe Martin and his distance and indifference was actually perfect.

He finally opened the door after three rounds of knocking and two phone calls.

"You're here sooner than I expected." He said, cheeks slightly pink and breathing fast.

"Yeah Gavi lives really close by. Can I come in?" You asked, raising an eyebrow at his form, which blocked the entryway entirely.

"Uh," he looked over his shoulder before responding, "yeah sure. Come in." You entered his house, removing your shoes at the door. Martin had called you "backwards" the first time you did this at his house. As a person in medicine, you couldn't comprehend tracking the entire bacteria ecosystem onto the floor of his house, but it was one of those things you just agreed to disagree on.

"Making sure the other girlfriend left before letting me in?" You laughed, and he spun around quickly, grabbing you by the shoulders and leaning down to look at you.

"I know you make a lot of jokes, but this can't be one of them," he said, his tone somber and serious. "Don't ever joke about me being a cheater. It's not who I am and I am a better person than that." You were shocked by his sudden change in mood, putting your hands up in surrender and apologizing.

Gavi laid awake in bed, legs tangled in the sheets, moving from one side to the other, unable to find a single moment of rest. He checked the phone on his nightstand every couple of minutes, waiting to see your name light up the screen. Why weren't you home? It had been over an hour since you had left his house. Martin was definitely not interesting enough to keep you at his place for so long, especially after a match day. The longer he thought about it, the more the sweat pooled on his brow and the dread seeped into him. Maybe you two were having sex. Maybe you would be spending the night at his house, and Gavi would never get the "I'm home" text. He tried to calm himself, but everything irritated him. Why did you have to leave him to go to your stupid boyfriend's house? Why did he want you to tell Martin to fuck off and lay on the couch with him? Why did he want to know so badly if you two were having sex?

As with most news he got about your relationship, he heard the tip from Ansu who obviously heard it from Ferran: after three months together, you and Martin had still not had sex. After the initial 'why the hell are you guys talking about this', Gavi started to listen to Ansu's gossip as he packed his things after practice. He heard about Martin's complaints.

"Apparently, he told Ferran that she will kiss him and touch him and make him hard, then she will pull away and go home. He said first it was like exciting - ya know, being teased, playing hard to get. But now he's kind of getting impatient ya know. Ferran told him to get another girl."

"To break up with y/n?" Gavi asked a little more enthusiastically than he intended. Pedri looked up from his phone and raised an eyebrow at Gavi, but refrained from making a comment. He wanted to go home, and he knew the longer this conversation continued, the longer it would be till he could sit in front of his TV and play FIFA.

"No not to break up with her. Ferran was like 'oh you know she's wife material like she is good in front of cameras and will look nice for your Wikipedia page. But if you want to have sex just go to a girl in a club and sleep with her and then do the couple shit with y/n when you feel like it. You already set her expectations low."

Pedri swears to this day he saw the smoke rise from Gavi's ears at the suggestion that Martin cheat on you. In football and in life, Gavi hated cheats. He wanted to tell you, but was advised against it.

"Unless we hear that he is actually cheating on her, there's no need to hurt her feelings or add stress to her life."

So now he sat in bed, frustrated in more than one way, as he thought about you and Martin having sex. He closed his eyes, hoping to conjure up a new mental image, but all he saw was you. You were in the same sweatshirt and leggings that you had come over in the other day. Martin was nowhere to be seen. You were in the living room, laying on the soft leather of the couch, beckoning Gavi over.

He felt the blood begin to pool and his cock start to harden. He threw one arm over his eyes, groaning loudly. It had become a common occurrence for him to get horny when thinking about you, but usually he could will the image away by reminding himself that you two were friends and would not be anything more. Usually. Today it wasn't working. The image of you on his couch, licking your lips and calling him over refused to disappear. The tighter he closed his eyes the stronger it got.

He moved his hand to palm his aching erection through the fabric of the boxers he had worn to sleep. The you in his head was standing now, playing with the hem of your sweatshirt. The sight of skin (imaginary as it was), encouraged him further, and set his very skin ablaze. He pushed down his boxers, stroking himself slowly now. In his head now, you had slowly stripped away your sweatshirt, leaving you in a bra and tight leggings that cupped your ass in the most sensual ways. He was panting now, breathing heavily, switching between stroking his cock and playing with the head. In his mind you stripped off your leggings, leaving you in just your bra and panties for him to stare at, taking in the sight of your body. Beads of precum formed at the head, which he spread around, teasing his most sensitive nerves. He knew once he came you would disappear, and he didn't want to be without you.

The real you was in a similar position: seductive and shirtless. You were currently under Martin, shirt having been discarded somewhere in the living room as he pressed you into the couch. He broke from you to pull off his shirt, then captured your lips once again. You move fervently to match his pace. He kneaded your breasts between his hands. Rough. Everything Martin did was fast and rough. And you tried to keep up, but the only sounds leaving you were heavy breaths from exertion, not arousal.

The scene in Gavi's head switched perspectives. He was now on the couch, legs spread open, inviting you in. You walked towards him slowly, and he drank in the sight of you. You crawled onto his lap, straddling him, and rested your forehead against his. Your eyes, your lips, your breasts - the image of all three sent shock waves through his body and straight to his cock. He gripped it now. He wanted to turn to his nightstand, grab something to lubricate with and stroke in earnest, but he was afraid he would lose the vision of you.

In Martin's house, the real you was searching for an escape. Martin was kissing your neck, grinding into you like a dog in heat. After a few minutes he noticed that you had gone silent, even your breathing relaxing now. He came up to look at you. What kind of girl didn't get turned on from activities like this? He decided to switch positions so that you were laying on top of him, and he dug his fingers into your hips and ass pressing your clothed core against him. He was unmistakably hard, but you felt nothing. There was no pool in your panties or heat in your loins. You were kissing him hard but felt, well, indifferent. Like you might rather be doing laundry.

In Gavi's head, you were a puddle. He had captured your lips between his own, kissing you deeply as you rocked against him, the kiss only breaking when he hit your sweet spot, causing you to moan out. He let his hands roam your bare skin, and he could almost feel the warmth. Fingers resting on your waist, he moved with you, rutting against each other and chasing your release. He looked down at the two of you, watching the wet spot on your panties grow as you ground your clit into his hard-on. He moved to your neck, kissing and suckling until little marks bloomed on the skin. You whimpered out, and now Gavi wanted to do everything in his power to make you moan in earnest. You were looking at him with those gorgeous eyes, begging, pleading, imploring Gavi to do more. And he wanted to do so much more.

The action ended for the real you rather quickly. Martin was pushing you against him, bruising your pelvic bone as he chased his own orgasm, almost forgetting that you weren't a sex doll. You decided to help finish him off quickly and go back to your place. Maybe you would still have time for that laundry. You placed your hands on either side of his head, his face basically buried in your breasts, and you started to grind into him earnestly, rocking your hips in a way that you knew drive men crazy. Within 45 seconds he was cumming in his pants, moaning loudly, and pressing into you so hard you were worried it would leave marks. You gave him a quick kiss and tugged your shirt back on. You both exchanged words about seeing each other soon, and you walked out of his house to your car alone and unsatisfied.

Gavi was almost in pain. His cock was angry and throbbing, begging for him to stroke himself in earnest. But he couldn't do it dry, and he would rather remove his cock entirely than lose this dream of you. You were now in front of him, on your knees, touching his upper thighs. He felt the ghostly sensation on his skin as he remembered every time you pressed your fingers into the muscular flesh in your office (or on his couch). You pulled down his boxers, and his cock sprung free. You leaned over and let your tongue hang from your mouth, your drool flowing on to his cock. Gavi brought his hand up and spit in his palm, pretending it was you. He brought it back down and began stroking, long fluid motions from base to tip. You were also stroking him, looking up at him with those big innocent "fuck me" eyes, and he couldn't stop himself from moaning out.

He wanted you. He wanted you to be on your knees for him, on his lap, under him in bed. He wanted you. He had never been harder in his life. And then he got to those lips. Those pink perfect lips that spoke to him so gently, teased him, called out his name - in his mind he watched them stretch over his cock. His self restraint snapped. He brought his hand up again, spitting into his palm multiple times, and beginning to stroke his cock rapidly. He wished it was you. He wished it was your smaller hand wrapped around him, so he could guide you to stroke it in just the way he liked. He was playing with the head of his cock now, imagining your lips sinking deeper and deeper over him, looking up at him with tears in your pretty eyes.

There was no more pretending and no more care. The sheets were thrown off, the room filled with heavy breaths, groans, and the squelching sound of Gavi pumping his cock. His dream you had pulled of and was now leaving gently kisses on his cock, licking the head shyly. Your lips were red and swollen, a product of his passionate kisses and his member. Gavi was almost there. He squeezed his eyes shut as hard as he could, trying to see you, imagine you more clearly. You were alternating licking at his slit and sucking on his head. He was gone. Moans of your name mixed with "please" filled his room. He wished you were there. He wanted to feel your skin, the smooth warmth under his finger tips. He wanted to hear your voice, soft and silky and telling him how good he was going. He was so, so close. He had never edged himself this much in his life, but he wanted to keep watching you.

The dream you pulled off of the head of Gavi's cock, placing a kiss on it, before crawling back up his body. He tried to capture your lips in yet another kiss, but he couldn't. He felt you drape yourself over his thigh, grinding into the muscle there as you pumped his cock for him. He fisted his own cock at a bruising pace. He would deal with the consequences afterwards. Now he was ready to cum to you, for you. You leaned into his ear, still riding his thigh, one hand wrapped around him, and you moaned out,

"Pablo."

His orgasm washed over him in a tidal wave, knocking the air out of him. He moaned your name out loudly, filling the whole house with his sounds of pleasure. Cum landed on his chest, and he continued to pump himself through the orgasm, thinking of you and riding out his high. When it was over, he calmed himself and worked to slow his breathing. His eyes were still screwed shut, but you weren't there anymore. He was alone and covered in his own load, and he was still thinking about you.

Once he had composed himself (and his legs were stable enough for him to walk, he went to the bathroom and cleaned himself, donning a new pair of boxers to actually sleep in. Once he returned to his bed, he saw his phone light up.

[Doctora]: I just got home. Have a good night Pablo

His chest got tight again as he laid in bed, staring at your words to him. You hadn't forgotten. He set his alarm and laid down, the exhaustion from his orgasm settling in now and making his eyelids heavy. When he closed his eyes, he saw you again. This time you were fully clothes - in one of his hoodies and a pair of his sweats. You were in bed next to him, arm stretched out, beckoning him to come closer to you. Gavi hugged one of his pillows close to his chest, imagining it was you sleeping in his arms, and drifted off.

[Gavi]: Have a good night, doctora. Dream of me

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: not proofread because I don't feel like it. I hope you al enjoy this part! I think this is the last part of 'exposition'/ setting up their dynamic, so relationship building will start in the next chapter, so I hope you all stick with me for the rest of the story! I love hearing all your reactions in the comments, so please don't be shy to comment! Or if you're a little shy, feel free to send me an anon ask!

Also please comment if you want to be added to the taglist ok bye

*~*Taglist*~*

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[padfootscoldleathers]

i'll leave (a light on) ch.2

Minnie watches them all pack in and file out before picking Sirius from the pack. "There's someone waiting for you on the bus."

He scrunches his brows together, "Is it our lawyer again? I swear it wasn't me this time and if it was I plead the fifth." Minnie stops them with a hand on his shoulder. 

"You are a citizen of the United Kingdom," she says, squinting. 

"A citizen in the United States of America, so I will be using their laws and I plead the fifth and will now be taking a vow of silence," he replies smoothly and continues walking out the building. Peter stops walking and waits for her to catch up. 

"Minnie," Pete whispers, "Want to make a bet?" 

McGonagall checks him top to bottom, "Let me hear it."

"We'll take guesses of how long it'll take for him to crack. Whoever's closer, timewise, wins. I say 20 minutes." Pete explains while they trail after Sirius and they both start a stopwatch.

"Six. What exactly are we betting?"

"I want to see what's in the locked box you keep in the drawer under the couch in the tour bus." Peter says it like he knows something or the curiosity has been eating at him. He shrugs, "I'll also take one item if it interests me."

Minerva's heels echo mutely on the concrete as they exit the building. She hums in agreement, "And when I win?" He thinks for a moment but draws a blank, "Anything you like, Minnie."

"A blank check is a dangerous game, Mister Pettigrew."

"Yeah, but it's you, what's the worst that can happen? I like to live on the edge a little and you wouldn't do wrong by me, would you, Minnie?"

"Nothing's concrete. You have yourself a deal." They shake hands and make their way outside to see Kingsley driving in ahead of them with the bus. They load in and not a moment later do they hear Sirius' surprised gasp. Then he starts rambling like a madman, making absolutely no sense but tangibly excited. Peter hears the strangled mutter of "I missed you too" before he realises he's already lost. He slowly turns his head to see Minnie holding up her phone stopped at 5:32. "I suppose I overestimated slightly. You won't be getting inside that box but you do owe me. I know you're a man of your word and if not... I'll call your mamá." Peter eyed her slowly head to heels and back, "You would, wouldn't you?That's low, Minnie." She grins like a cheshire and walks past him, heels clicking, "It's deliciously clever."

"Mm, I'm sure. Deliciously deceiving," he utters under his breath once she's gone. He makes his way over to where Sirius is wrapped tightly and rocking in place with an old friend. Peter smiles slow and fervently and trudges over as Sirius reluctantly lets go. He wraps his arms around her and hooks his chin over her shoulder, "It's lovely to see you, Marianne." Mary hugs him fondly, "I know." He knocks his head into hers and she snickers, "Alright, alright, lovely seeing you, dushi."

He pulls back and narrows his eyes at her suspiciously, "You're here early." Peter steps back completely to inspect her, eyes her head to toe. Then he paces around her, lifting her hair, arms, kicking in the backs of her knees and ducks when she tries to flick him for it. "Ay yai yai, calm down, I'm just checking your mobility. Meds, supplements?" he asks while he holds her face in both hands and turns it both ways. 

"Yes and yes, every morning." He tugs on her ears, checks her temperature with the back of his hand before nodding in approval. 

"How's the stump?" Peter asks, smirking. 

"You know I don't like calling him that," she utters unimpressed.

"Why didn't you choose Hephaestus, again?" Mary rolls her sparkling brown eyes at him. 

"Because the accident was a Hiccup in my life. Also 'half Hephaestus' doesn't sound cool; too many syllables." Peter grins at her with a small kick to her bionic leg. 

"Hey, you break it, you buy it." Sirius breaks out laughing behind her. 

"You're laughing but he cost me several months rent." Marlene walks in freshly drunk behind them and giggles, "A limb more like." That gets Dorcas snickering. Mary slowly raises her right brow and says, "That joke was dropped off a cliff and died harder than Fili in the Hobbit." A mourning silence fills the room and Marls's voice cracks as she mutters, "Ouch. I respect it, message received but... Damn."

Mary throws her arms around Dorcas and Marlene and fully kisses both their cheeks. "Marls, you’ve got to understand I hear that joke all the time, it's annoying now. It's like when people call you an oreo 'cause you have vitiligo or tell you to go back in the blender."

"That's more in line with bullying though. Do you feel like we're bullying you?" Cas asks with an arm snaked around Marlene's waist.

"I don't, but it gets irritating."

"I bully her," Peter cuts in. "Every day." He shakes his head like it's nothing. "It's my job as her brother." He pinches her cheeks from behind and like his abuela does to them sometimes. "Isn't that right, sugarplum." Mary's eyes are unimpressed in contrast. 

"¿Sabes qué, Chiquito?" She utters as she turns around and tries to grab at him, but Peter ducks and runs off to the bunks at the back of the bus in a fit of giggles. Although not before stealing a bottle of tequila from Marlene, who then chases after him, on the way. Dorcas then backs out of the lounge to 'save Minnie from a murder charge'.

Mary drops herself on the sofa and her eye twitches for a bit, then she sighs out as much of the air in her lungs as she can. She makes eye contact with Sirius and she can tell he knows. They've been friends for more than half their lives and he knows her on so many vulnerable levels. Sirius could always tell when Mary was loathing herself. Perhaps because it was so familiar to him, by guilt or by force. She thinks it's because when the quiet rolls in, she drifts away, that it's visible. Still, she hopes that if she drifts far enough, she won't even have to pretend her problems aren't happening. Dreams to be so far that their anxieties won't exist to her.

She sits there staring at him and gradually her eyes haze until she doesn’t really see anymore. Sirius pulls her in and Mary lays her forehead to the side of his neck as he rubs circles into her back. Sirius sings softly into her hair but Mary only gets the melody. It's soothing nonetheless. Something about being with her best friend is making all the shit she's going through finally sink in. It all crashes into her like pain after an adrenaline high and in all honesty – it just really has her feeling like a pile of shit.

Moments pass and the present feels like eternity and yet as if no time has passed at all. Time is measured between speed bumps and red lights while she wonders if this is what it feels like to be losing your mind. She doesn't get to think about it before she falls asleep. Lullabies will have that effect.

Sirius sits up and unrolls the sleeve down her prosthetic, gently removes the leg and puts it to charge. He scoops her up and walks her over to the bunks trying his best not to stumble as the bus turns a corner. He shifts her onto one of the beds but when he tries to pull the blanket over her finds Mary's hands clutching his sweater in a fist.

Peter and the girls drag out an 'awe' from the bunk across and he has to shush them. Sirius watches Mary’s face glisten with sweat for the single second it takes him to decide to climb in. He curls an arm around her head and strokes her hair as she tries to bury herself between his ribs. Mary gradually calms and Sirius wonders what the hell Lily Evans had done this time and what hair stylist she'd moved to.

thank you for reading but first mary macdonald. this is only here 'cause it's her birthday EVERYBODY SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARY

(day two of did you get the reference) taglist under the cut

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@s0ggyguts @nyx-taylors-version @will-vs-the-homo-sapiens-adgenda @siriusly-insane

[mitsukiwa]

Baby, love me cause I'm playing on the radio.

Previous I part 5 I *My wattpad user is 6arelyhuman_ if u want the outfits visuals u should read it there*

WARNING!!! There will include: angst, fluff, smut, love triangle

Summary: You love bill and there’s no doubt in your heart, unbeknownst to you he feels the same way. You both have to overcome challenging events that leads the both of you to grow apart, what happens when his twin brother feels for you? Will you be able to crush his heart? What will you do to prevent hurting them both?

On the way there the boys were all conversing except for bill, who was glued to his phone; he wasn't necessarily using it but checking it every ten seconds. Which if I was being honest did annoy me.

When I did try and include him in the conversation, he only hummed while still looking at the phone.

"Who's the lucky girl?", "Or guy?" George hastily adds.

Tom was driving, Gustav was in the passenger seat and as for me and George we were in the backseat with Bill.

Bill turns the phone away from George, bills cheeks flush red.

"No one"

Yup, there's that high pitched tone in his voice he does when he's lying. Bill was always bad at lying.

"Clearly their something if they have you checking your phone every five minutes" George retorts.

Bill let's out a puff of air finally relenting.

"Fine, yeah, she's a girl I bumped into at the store, and we exchanged numbers" he saids scratching the back of his neck nervously.

Every second that went by along with every word that left his lips, felt like a sharp knife stabbing deeper and deeper into my heart. I feel heat behind my eyes, I look out the window to avoid them from seeing me.

I blink my tears away. I didn't want the mascara to smudge, I wipe beneath my eyes Incase any black smudged.

I disassociated myself.

George shook me back when we got to the club, saying 'we're here'.

▀▄▀▄▀▄🄽🄴🅇🅃▀▄▀▄▀▄

The line to enter was fairly long, there would also be times when fans recognized us and stopped for a picture.

Tom wasted no time in chatting with some bimbo in the line.

Gustav and I were talking about Hamburg. George was beside bill, talking about the girl bill was talking too.

I heard bill behind me say "I invited her, she said she'll be here in 15"

I stopped mid sentence, Gustav asked if I was okay.

"Are you okay?" He had a worried expression.

"Mhm" I lie, not giving a verbal response.

"You sure?" He had a skeptical look.

"Yeah, I'm fine really" I try and assure him. He stares at me for a few seconds long before finally leaving it when I flash him a smile.

The line had now moved up, we were now next, each of us showed our IDs, before everything the bouncer gave us a nod waving his hand dismissively. We weren't the required age but since his daughter was a fan of the band he's given us that privilege.

He nodded firmly for us to enter, the five of us stalk in.

We open a metal door revealing a bar and blasting music with neon lights.

"Let's get drinks!" Bill yelled over the loud music.

The five of us walk up to the bar. We sit on some vacant stools.

"I'm gonna get shit faced" George saids.

You weren't going to judge him for that, he had recently broken up with his girlfriend of three years, she had said she couldn't do the long distance with him being away on tour for months.

He really did love her so you did infact understand his heartbreak.

"Don't get too drunk last time you woke up at some random ass place you didn't know" I say.

"Yeah, take her word for it" Tom agreed with me.

"at least I don't wake up with two random girls I don't even fucken know in my bed" George saids.

"At least I know how to keep a girl satisfied" Tom retorts his signature smirk making itself known on his face.

It started getting more heated up, when Tom mentioned Georges Ex, Cassie.

George had stood up with fisted hands, Tom did too.

Bill and I had to push them away from each other.

I was angry at both of them for their childish behavior. Gustav calmed down George whilst I had to calm Tom.

I knew Tom would still be upset; he had a tendency of holding grudges.

"Guys let's not cause a scene" I say looking around to find a few people staring at us. The bartender looks at us warily. I knew she had been close to call the security, I wave my hand dismissively at her.

"Everythings fine"

She nods, returning back to making drinks.

"George was the one who started it" Tom points an accusing finger at George. I roll my eyes at him.

"No I fucken didn't"

"Guys come on, let's not fight over something as dumb as this" Gustav saids.

Gustav was kind of the mediator in our group. Bill was also sometimes, but if it involved him, he was always right. He was just petty like that.

"Ima go dance" Tom said, walking away from the bar, and to the dance floor.

" I need a drink" I say, letting out a sigh.

"Me too" Gustav saids.

"Me three" bill also adds

"I'll also have one" George buts in.

I motion for the bartender to come over, "hello, what can I do for you guys" she asks with a smile, if I said she was beautiful that would an understatement, she was gorgeous.

Light blue eyes that seemed to shine under the neon lights of the club.

Dirty blonde hair that sat just beneath her shoulder.

"I'll have a tequila" bill orders.

"I'll have one of those too" I say

Gustav and George ordered a beer. The bartender whisked away to prepare the drinks.

In the corner of my eye I see bill pulling out his phone. He lets out a gasp that has the G's and I heads turning to look at bill.

"She's here" he whisper yells.

I was curious and sad to see how she looked. It already hurt a hell lot that he was talking to some one he may potentially start dating.

Suddenly the seat I was sat on felt uncomfortable, I couldn't help but fidget with my hands.

I didn't know what happened next but bill got up and made his way out the bar.

"Where'd he go?" I ask Gustav.

"He went to meet her upfront"

'oh' I say. Oh was nothing compared to what I really wanted to say. I wanted to cry, or yell. I felt frustrated at myself, and mad at bill.

Even though it wasn't exactly his fault.

The bartender slides the alcohol to us, without second thought I down the liquid. And another, along with a few more that accompanied those.

"Woah, your gunna make them run out of supplies, tone it down a little" Gustav saids.

I roll my eyes at him. "Gosh, gustavi your no fun" I whine out.

He chuckles at me, I pout at him.

"Stop being mean" I slurred.

Yes, I was drunk. It takes me about four drinks tops to get drunk.

"I'm not mean I'm nice" he answered with a playful tone.

I wave my hand dismissively. "Not even"

I was about to raise my hand once again to ask for more drinks but mid way Gustav pulled my hand down.

"No more" he states firmly. More like demands.

"Fine, no more" I emphasized 'NO'.

He smiled at my comprehension.

" Guys, do you think that bartender would give me her number if I asked?" George asked.

With all due respect it seemed she wasn't interested in George but in Tom, but don't tell him it'll crush him and his heart of gold.

"Sure man, go ahead" Gustav saids shrugging his shoulders.

I wasn't going to comment on anything, so I just nod my head at Gustav's words.

The bartender comes back with two Bacardi's, not a third one sadly.

They count down to down their shots, "you guys are such a buzz kill"

"We're only looking out for you, mini bill"

I roll my eyes at the nickname. They always called me that when we all met back in middle school. Apparently I'm sassy like bill, which I wholeheartedly doubt.

I blow a strand of hair from my face, over and over to pass time.

I look back at the dance floor.

" Guys I'ma go dance" I was letting them know just Incase.

The song playing

They nodded at me, with that I got up and made my way to the dance floor. I managed to find a not so crowded area on the dance floor and began to dance, I started off by swaying my hips, my fingers running up and down the length of my body.

My eyes closed while I danced to the song that had just came up.

I began to feel lonely so I look around for someone to dance with.

Though I really didn't have to look long, a male came up to me, and said over the loud blasting music.

"wanna dance, sweetheart?" I nod my head.

I press my body on his, I feel his hands grip either side of my hips, I don't mind though. There was so much going on this just couldn't add up. Maybe I'll have him for a night. Who knows? I mean he's not quite bad looking either...

He closes any space between us, leaving us both pressed together if that's even possible.

We were both dancing for a few minutes, when I feel his lips latch onto the side of my neck, leaving open mouthed kisses, I move my head more to the side to give him access.

He starts sucking on the sensitive skin there. I know it'll bruise, though I don't mind.

His hands slide down lower and grope my ass.

I'm about to tell him something about it, when I feel his body being roughly pushed off me.

The guy yelled out 'what the fuck, man!"

I flicker my eyes to him on the ground then over to the man standing before him, Tom was fuming, both of his hands fisted in a tight clench.

"Don't fucking touch her" he grits out at the man on the ground.

The man on the floor raised his hands up in surrender. "She wanted it man, I was giving her what she wanted".

I roll my eyes at him. Wow, such a wuss

Tom turned to you with an angry expression.

"What the fuck? You were gunna asleep with this piece of shit?!" Tom yelled at me.

I shrugged. "I don't know, I was considering it, but, uh, on second thought I think I'll pass"

Tom's face got even more angrier, if that's even possible.

I'm sure that vein on his forehead would pop any second now.

He roughly grabs your forearm, dragging you out of the dance floor.

I would have been scared if someone else were doing this to me but then again it's Tom.

"Ouch, that hurts Tom"

He stayed dead silent, his hold seemed to tighten around my arm.

Yeah, okay so now I was scared.

I began to struggle out of his hold on me.

"Let go of me, you're acting like a prick"!

My complaints went ignored. I couldn't even see his face, just the back of his head.

I looked around anxiously, occasionally stumbling on my heels.

My arm went limp when I saw Bill and some girl at the bar area. She was giggling, and Bill had on a huge smile. I scowl at them. And with the alcohol In my system I was by far worse.

I turn back to Tom. He's still dragging me.

"Tom, take me home, please" Tears were threatening to fall out from my eyes.

He halts his steps before turning around and looking down at me.

His mouth slightly dropped when he saw my red rimmed eyes and puffy nose.

"I don't wanna be here anymore" I let out weakly.

He looked around, his eyes landed on what I also had seen.

He lets out a quiet 'oh' He swiftly picks me up bridle style, I yelp out.

"Those heels look uncomfortable, plus you hate heels" was his excuse.

"Yeah, I hate heels" I admite.

I lay my head on his chest. I close my eyes, but with every step he took my body would shake in his arms.

When we got outside, he walked to the parking lot over to his car.

He opened the passenger door, and sat me down.

"He looks happy" I say out loud.

Tom freezes, glancing at me. He was in the midst of putting on my seatbelt.

"I mean, if you think so" he shrugged. " He seems bored if you ask me" he says.

"No, he doesn't" I slur.

He was just saying that to make me feel better.

"Whatever you say" He clicks on my seatbelt.

Silence

"The other you is so much better" I sigh out.

Tom squints at me. He raises an eyebrow confused.

I continue, "you know, when he got rejected on that audition, I wanted to beat up those judges"

Tom couldn't help but laugh at you, you always made a fool of yourself when you were drunk.

"Yeah,me too"

My head perked up. "Really?" I ask.

"Yeah, I wanted to egg their cars and pop their tires, but looking back on that now I would have gone to jail."

I giggled at him. "You're so stupid Tom."

He chuckles at me.

"Sure, I am".

"Do you really think he likes her?" I ask weakly, voice above a whisper.

Tom looks at me then down at my lap. He looks at my eyes, then ruffles my hair. Flashing me a smile. An actual smile, not a smirk of his, or a slight smile but a genuine smile. It's contagious so I feel myself also smiling.

"Give that little head of yours a break, yeah?" He taps his index finger on my forehead. I scowl at him.

He pulls his upper body out of the car, closing the passenger door. He walks over to the other side, he opens the door of the driver's side. Stepping into the car. He sits himself down, clicking on his seatbelt.

Before he presses the on button on the car, he looks at me and saids, "I will show you I'm better than the other me"

I feel a pit in my stomach the second those words process in my head.

He looks ahead, driving out of the parking lot and to my apartment complex.

© Mitsukiwa 2023-Do not copy,post or translate my work anywhere.

[filthforfriends]

Poll: Which fic do I finish?

While writing Guardian Angel I've started a lot of fics. I'm going to post the beginning of each and let you vote on which one I should finish. (Depending on the fic, I might let you vote to change the character) Please reblog this post. Tumblr still hasn't fixed my blog so no one is getting my notifications or tags.

#1 Quirk

Quirk was the language you’d decided on. You called it a problem, Thomas called it fucking adorable, and quirk seemed neutral. Sometimes you’d blame it on him. Tommy loved your rty talk, insisted upon it. The closer you got to orgasam, the more it became descriptors and ramblings, instead of intentional and sexy. 

You couldn’t just stop talking altogether when things become less polished. Falling silent would be awkward. Tom would worry about your pleasure and check-in. You’d already tried that. Most of all it was hard to shut up when Thomas was hanging on to your every word. Especially when you were on top, and he was gazing up at you like the mortal equivalent of Aphrodite. Eyes wide, but also threatening to flutter closed from the stimulation. Pillow, pink lips parted, sexy little teeth showing, and flushed beautifully, elegant nose included. 

“I love it when you talk to me,” he admitted in the afterglow.

#2 Panic

Thomas snapped at you, probably because he needed an outlet and you were the closest thing. It really upset you. Not because he was cruel, or because your boyfriend wasn’t allowed to have a bad day. Thomas simply didn’t externalize stress onto his loved ones. He’d play some violent video game or destroy his nails by picking the polish off or shred his guitar until it was out of horrousicly tune. Taking it out on you, however? A very irregular occurrence.  

You’d still slept in the same bed that night, both wide awake for different reasons. His breathing was off, almost panicked. Thomas would get these runaway, anxious trains of thought that sped his heart rate up. He couldn’t stop the worrying.

#3 Something New

Two years ago it might have freaked Thomas out, but he’d matured as a sexual partner since then. He understood that him and sex toys were on the same team. He knew lube was his friend, not his competition. Sure, sometimes natural excretions are enough. Sometimes a carefully selected lubricant can make things more comfortable. There was also a third option: menstrual blood, which he fondly coined nature’s bonus lube. 

He’d tried this euphemism when proposing maybe not avoiding sexual contact like the plague for six days every month. Which is when he learned that a questionable father figure and all your brothers had acted like your period was the most disgusting thing in the universe. 

It started with dropping to your knees in front of him as soon as you got home from work.

#4 Awake

The last time you checked your phone with an exasperated huff it had read 10:45pm. Ethan was supposed to text you when he was going to be home 15 minutes ago. It wasn’t a particularly significant amount of time, but you were struggling to keep your eyes open. He’d occupied your thoughts nearly every moment of this very long day that had rendered you exhausted to the point of vertigo. 

Regardless, Ethan had brought back an obscene lingerie set from France and gifted it to you this morning. So tonight's plans had been implied hours ago. The body suit and garter belt was gorgeous and so fucking uncomfortable that you wanted to time wearing it until the last minute. No matter how sleepy you felt, the adrenaline and endorphins of the moment would keep you going.

#5 Satin, Lace, and Other Pretty Things Part (continued)

Digging through what you affectionately referred to as your little box of horrors, was even more fun than you anticipated. You’d forgotten the full contents of your sex toy collection since you’d moved in with Thomas and stuffed it at the bottom of a closet. He had a barricade up that you were always testing the bounds of, trying to gently work around. Anal fingering? Fine (as long as you didn’t really talk about it). Rimming? Nope. 

Thomas made up for this with orgasams galore, so you were far from bored. However, you also knew that wiping out a 10 inch neon green dick and balls with a suction cup at the base would just intimidate, and maybe also traumatize him. So you kept the more adventurous items in your collection tucked away in case they became appropriate later on. At the bottom of this innocuous looking plastic container, was your strap on harness. It was simple, because that's all you could afford when it came to quality leather and an adjustable o-ring.

You sat with your back to the wall, amongst phallices and vibrators spread out on the hardwood floor, running the black straps through your fingers.

#6 Colleagues

Embarrassingly enough, it was the most action you’d gotten in months. You were turning a corner, nose in your field trip roster, not watching your surroundings because the building was practically empty. His tennis shoes were quiet enough that you didn’t see Damiano until walked right into you. This wasn't a meet cute bumping into each other, you fully collided and lost balance.

“Oh shit! Shit!” He pulled you against him to stop your fall and hold you upright. For a second you were a few inches away from one of the most beautiful faces god had ever created. Giant brown eyes, jaw sharper than a blade, sky high cheekbones and an inhuman level of symmetry. Damiano knocked everything in your hands loose, a folder full of papers scattered on the shiny floor.

#7 Alpha!Ethan

“Ethan, hold your breath,” Damiano exclaims. It’s a harmless enough request that he obliges rather than asking why. Being the most rational member of Maneskin was a chaotic experience at best. That is until Dami breaks out into laughter, Victoria snickering with a hand over her mouth. Ethan hears the door shut and looks in your direction. 

Walking into a room where you're the subject of the latest joke was never a great feeling. Your alpha’s bandmates were never cruel, but the power differential always made you feel like a target on some level. Even if it was just teasing between friends, they were all alphas and you were an omega. All eyes were on you: Dami and Victoria because they thought your influence over the ever-composed Ethan was hilarious. Your boyfriend looked annoyed and Thomas awkward.

#8 DILFiano (continued)

Three hours: barely a respectable amount of time to party hop with your friends before asking to go home. It’s not like you didn’t have a good excuse: they wanted to drive over an hour to some bougie party in the hills. Icarus liked to use her dad's name to get into events every now and then, just for the thrill of it...

“Is it okay to just drop you off at mine? Or do you need me to take you home?” Your heart jumps at the prospect of spending time in the David’s home. Pretending you were on this little adventure for Icarus was morally and emotionally exhausting. It’s not that you didn’t care about your friend, but because the globe had shifted its axis.

#9 More Than Friends

You were going to tell her. Victoria had made her intentions clear, and insisted you don’t answer right away. 

“There's no time line. I’m sorry if this – I don’t want you to feel pressured. We’re still friends like before. Even if you’re not interested. Okay?” You open your mouth to agree. “Don’t say anything just yet,” she blurts. You raise your eyebrows, asking if now you’re allowed to say something. 

“Sorry, sorry, uh! I ask you a question then interrupt you. I’m just…” Vic sighs and looks at her hands, fingers chipping at the navy nail polish. “I’m so fucking nervous,” she confesses. Her suitcase stood by the door: so nervous she waited until the very last minute.

#10 Information Introductions (continued)

“Whatever you want.” You’re on your sides, facing each other. Damiao has both his hands tucked under his head like a pillow, like you’re at your first sleepover. It's such a sharp contrast to the man who just coaxed you towards orgasam with such tenderness for the past...15 minutes? You look up to the vintage clock on your wall, still ticking away.

“40 minutes? Is your leg okay?” Damiano chuckled.

“Yeah, it's fine.” His voice lilted up on the last syllable, like the corners of his mouth upturned in a smile. You wanted to drag your fingertips along his side, but initiating touch felt like you were reaching out into the dark.

[layanasstories]

Cause of pain

Part 5

I hated it. I hated him, hated the betrayal. I hated my life. I hated myself for being addicted to him. Everything I encounter in my aimless flight I kick or beat out of my way. Every breath hurts and brings shooting pains in my chest. My stomach also keeps squeezing, forcing me to stop running all the time to stop the gagging. The lump in my throat is so big that I can't even sob anymore. The gasping for breath makes me cough only to suppress the gagging again. As my legs gave out, I collapsed and rolled up into a ball, crying.

The sun was already high in the sky when I finally sat upright again. I wiped the tears from my face and had made up my mind, closing everything once and for all. Looking around to orientate where I am, I see that I am next to the lake. A long walk was ahead of me, towards the village. In this case, the church was my refuge. Jake still had my backpack in his car; my dashing away had made me forget about it. Unfortunately, it contained my phone and wallet, which meant I couldn't get anything at a supermarket or cafe. So I hoped the church could help me get a glass of water and a toilet so I could freshen up.

The pastor was a real sweetheart. He immediately walked me towards the toilets and even gave me a small towel. The cold water against my face made me feel like I could breathe a little again. I cleaned myself up, stroked my hair a bit and made a neat ponytail. When I stepped out of the room, a female deacon was ready with some drinks and even a sandwich. The pastor and the deacon asked no questions; they were happy to help me. I barely got the sandwich down, but out of politeness I ate it completely. The ice water was like a gift from heaven, and let me be in exactly the right place to feel close to heaven. Although I am not religious myself, this glass of water almost converted me. Afterwards, I thanked them both kindly for their help and walked towards the police station.

The parking lot is small, room for five cars. There are three parked there, one police car, Alan's car and Jake's car. In the latter, I quickly check to see if my backpack is there, but unfortunately not. When I step inside the building I see a policemen sitting behind the counter. The hall is quiet but I can clearly hear some arguing back and forth at the back of the building. After a moment, the officer looks up from his work and greets me politely. "Good afternoon ma'am what can I do for you?". "I would like to speak to your chief." I answer him determinedly. "I don't know if he has time at the moment, if you want I can also listen to you." his attempt not to bother his boss is not going to succeed, because this man cannot help me. "I'm sorry, but no. I need to speak to Alan. I am sure he has time for me, you can pass on that Layana Schmidt is here for him." Forced, I give him a smile. "One moment, I will see what I can do for you." he smiles back and then gets up from behind his desk, disappearing through a door.

Within 15 minutes, I was in an interrogation room, waiting for Alan. I was surprised that when the door opened it was not Alan but Jake standing in the opening. "I have nothing to say to you, Mark" with the tone in which I say his fake name I try to show my disapproval. I have no desire to blow his cover, or betray his secret. I want to close the whole Duskwood chapter, with Jake in it. The disappointment on his face is huge, but says nothing and walks away again. Not long after, Alan steps into the room "Hi Layana, it's been a while. What brings you here to Duskwood?" had I not known him better, I would have bought into his kindness. "Oh except it's been a year since Richy killed himself? Or that it's been a year since Hannah can walk free again?" my eyebrow raises at the stupid question he asks. "Right. The memory of that terrible night and time, let's call it an anniversary." his answer is quick and without value. "I am also here because I heard that a body was found?" I ask my question directly, I am not in the mood for small talk. "That's right." his reply is equally short and direct. "Is it possible for me to identify the body?" this question makes him look a little out of sorts. “You want to identify the body? Does this mean you have an idea who it could be?" that he suspects me of involvement is more than obvious, and totally expected.

[themichaelvan]

I posted 5,387 times in 2022

That's 5,387 more posts than 2021!

268 posts created (5%)

5,119 posts reblogged (95%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@schmope-is-dead

@nachosforfree

@miiilowo

@fazbear-ent-official

@cherry-flavored-content

I tagged 3,060 of my posts in 2022

Only 43% of my posts had no tags

#favorite - 188 posts

#👀 - 149 posts

#goose tag - 88 posts

#inspo - 77 posts

#important - 50 posts

#server tag - 42 posts

#me - 37 posts

#prev - 26 posts

#blazed post tag - 25 posts

#prev tags - 23 posts

Longest Tag: 124 characters

#🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝🤝

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

why nearly every character in all of the fnaf musicals are insane in distinctly different but still very much insane ways: an essay

(this is like 80% from memory and its. checks time 2:15am as of writing this so excuse inaccuracies.)

mark: oh my god starting off with a bang, are we? okay okay. he was there for ONE NIGHT. one. one night. he spent like basically all of it crying in the corner because of puppets. theyre puppets. freddy is literally punted across the room on multiple occasions YOU ARE A FULL GROWN ADULT MARK. "in all my dreams i see / a maze of halls with bloody walls / and countless scrawls reminding me "it's me!"" YOU WERE THERE FOR ONE NIGHT. he IMMEDIATELY decides that the solution to this is not 1) taking it up with his manager 2) just fucking quitting bUT INSTEAD THAT ITS 3) BRING A DUFFEL BAG FULL OF WEAPONS, INCLUDING SEVERAL KNIVES AND GUNS TO HIS WORKPLACE INTENDING TO KILL THE ANIMATRONICS YOU WERE HIRED TO PROTECT. AND THEN THE ONLY THING HE DID TO CHANGE HIS IDENTITY AFTER NEARLY KILLING A MAN AND GETTING CAUGHT WAS TO DYE HIS HAIR. he didnt even change his ADDRESS. dipshit. he acts all tough and crap afterward too like he spent 40 years in prison. he was reduced to literal actual tears by puppets. god i love him so much.

nate: sassed the man holding a knife to one of the animatroniocs he, AGAIN, was HIRED to PROTECT. drove the animatronics to a man they KNOW is willing to use guns to protect himself in the FIRST PLACE. also he just ??? fuckign Had bb on hand like. did they give him bb when he quit the first time?? like. okay. say you have to distract an easily distracted but immensely murderous animatronic and your first thought is "hmm what if i use that rc car that looks like a child from my old workplace". bitch if its been 7 years since i worked there and witnessed a traumatizing event im gonna bury that fucker at the bottom of my closet not just have it with me. also his first concern when he was faced with a very much "i am going to die" situation is that he hasnt caught up on a tv show yet???? nate buddy please i appreciate you but get some self-worth and some therapy while youre at it

aj: he was nearly killed by an animatronic as big as he was, stopped only by like a foot or smth, and then IMMEDIATELY accepted the transfer to ANOTHER place with animatronics in it like. why would you actively choose to keep working with fazbear entertainment. im sure literally any other company ever would look at aj "nearly killed two men because he wanted to work more hours" purple guy and hire him in a millisecond. SPEAKING OF WHICH, HE NEARLY KILLED TWO MEN BECAUSE HE WANTED TO WORK MORE HOURS. DO YOU NEED THE MONEY THAT BADLY OR DO YOU JUST REALLY FUCKING. WANT TO WORK AT FAZBEARS THAT MUCH. i honeslty cant decide which is worse. he also mocked the guy with a chainsaw who burst through the wall not ten minutes before??? who was also like 2 feet away from him???? what were you EXPECTING him to do??????????????????? give you more hours????????????????????????

phone guy: yeah.

mike: looked at the absolute flaming dumpster fire that was the lawsuits, filthy animatronics, extremely low budget, and EXTREMELY sketchy boss that was the new fazbears and said "yeah i can work with this." also i think he got killed by pan stan which is such a sad way to go my god. i dont have quite as much to say about him but i DO love him very much and he REALLY SHOULD HAVE gotten a better job.

lizzy: other than the fact she hasnt quit fazent yet (which is excusable considering it looks like shes looking into the sketchy stuff and is probably mostly there for mikes death), actually not that bad. props to her tbh if i had to deal with a boss like phone guy id go considerably more feral.

those police officers who showed up for like 2 scenes in the og fnaf musical: just fucking, like. let an actual murder perp ESCAPE because they Forgot To Lock The Car And Went To Go Get Food and then just. DIDNT REPORT IT. because this, apparently, is NOT the first time theyve let someone escape, and because theyd LOSE THEIR JOBS IF THEY REPORTED IT. if the police is THAT bad in this town no fucking wonder phone guy's gotten away with everything so far.

41 notes - Posted August 7, 2022

#4

drops dead on the floor

43 notes - Posted October 7, 2022

#3

buddy.... are you..... sweeping..... the evil rune circle............

45 notes - Posted October 20, 2022

#2

SIGHS. okay whatever. 10k notes and i finish reading homestuck

81 notes - Posted October 3, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

i hope the admiral knows i love him

(original image under cut, id in alt)

2,341 notes - Posted September 12, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[ifyoucantflythenrun]

rant about some teacher aide at my school today

some teacher aide wrote me up with a warning today coz i took my phone out to check my card balance before lining up at the cafeteria to buy food. i’m sorry i didn’t want to waste other people’s time?

for context, this year the Australian government announced a policy named ‘Away for the day’ where students are not permitted to have phones out during school at all unless under explicit teacher instruction. the exception being to pay for food through a card connected to your phone. it was put into action as an attempt to get students to interact with each other more irl than online during break times and all public schools need to adhere to this.

seeing as i was in the cafeteria during a break time, i (apparently wrongfully) assumed i could check my card balance. i checked with a teacher and she tells me i need to be in the sectioned off area where you go to actually line up to buy stuff, just be in the general area of the line. you apparently have to be actually in the line to check a card balance and it has to take less than 15 secs to open and login to ur banking app according to a different teacher. and then after i was written up (where the teacher practically yelled at me and then took down my first name before forcefully turning me around to get my surname off of my senior jersey) i went to tell my friends because i hadn’t heard of such a rule in the 7 weeks that school had been in for this year and wanted to make sure they didn’t get in trouble like i did. as soon as i start recounting what happened, she comes up to me and my friends and says “i have ears you know, i can hear you.” to which i reply that i’m just letting them know so that she won’t have to write up more people. she then says “you don’t need to make such a big deal out of it,” and some other things along those lines, acting as if i was a toddler throwing a temper tantrum. mind you, until this point, i figured she was just doing her job as required by the government, and did not even think of smack-talking her to my friends. but the fact that she barged into a separate conversation i was having with my friends, assumed i was talking shit about her, and continued to passive aggressively point out she has ears and can hear was the straw that broke the camel’s back. like, did she want me to congratulate her for being able to hear the same way 80% of the world’s population does? i feel like that provides reason enough for me to share my experience with tumblr. also the warning scared me because i’ve had a clean record since primary school and getting a proper detention for the first time/having this be reported on with less than 9 months til i graduate would be so annoying it would be like losing a 4020+ day streak. i have an issue with perfectionism, i know, i’m working on it but it hasn’t fully gotten “there” yet, yk?

in my opinion, one of a few things happened here. she wrote me up for a stupid, made-up reason because she’s bitter and is abusing every ounce of power she holds against me as an anonymous authority figure (i’ve literally never talked to this woman in my entire 5 years at this school, 6th this year). and she knows she made it up so is censoring me in order to keep abusing her power against other students by stopping me from alerting others lest she has her little bit of power taken away once this eventually reaches the higher-ups. or. the school forgot to tell students that you can only take out your phone to check ur balance while actively taking up space in an already small cafeteria order area while not knowing if u can/will buy something or not. keep in mind this was during a 20 minute break in between periods during which we have to both get the food and eat it before class starts which would be okay if there weren’t at least 10 people not buying anything in a closed off area that holds about 30 people comfortably on a good day. the only other thing i can think of is that she was having a bad day and took it out on the first person she saw that she had power over. once she heard me telling my friends, she realised what an incredibly stupid idea that rule was and didn’t want it to be reported by me or my friends. this lady is maybe 50+ years of age and definitely knew what she was doing and it all happened too fast for me to even begin to question her until after the whole situation had already taken place. i’m friends with the school captain and our cohort is currently the longest running cohort at this school so the higher-ups sometimes look to us for help with improving the school, and i like to believe they actually take our opinions into consideration, considering how worried she got that i was telling my fellow students.

idk who’s in the wrong here so if this is just me being an entitled toddler and throwing a temper tantrum, so be it, i will fix my behaviour in the future but this is my way of moving past it coz no one sees this anyway. i can understand doing her job but no one told her to follow up a minute later by telling me off for speaking to my friends during a break time. i had respect for her as my elder and authoritative figure but that has since flown out the window once she decided to fling it through the glass. sorry if none of this made sense or had bad grammar, etc., i kinda just typed whatever entered my head.

[linggluu]

2023 wrap up!

i just woke up from an hour log nap because i've had this migraine since tuesday :D (not covid) but i needed to get this all out with a nice, one direction comfort playlist in the background. what a year i have lived.

january - went on my first work trip (flying) in my life to north dakota! the bad thing about the NE is that you CAN drive everywhere. i've driven all up and down the east coast just for work , and my customers are literally 20 minutes from my office so i can always drive there but january was the first week i had to fly

february - started going to the gym consistently for the first time since middle school with my best friend. this lasted all the way until july but i'm still in the habit :)

march - discovered the strange tales of the tang dynasty. refreshing bc i haven't watched an (ancient) mystery/thriller in such a long time. lu ling feng and i share a last name! I NEVER SHARE THE SAME NAME WITH ANY ONE IN A CDRAMA.

april - big fight with jeff. discussing our future and how much $$ we're gonna need if we're actually going to get a house. he thought i shouldn't be bitching because i have a "good job" which made a good salary. whoa buddy, i have to keep myself alive. this was a fight that last months especially because he's in florida right now with NO JOB and NOT finishing his degree. at least pick ONE and do it. Someone has to stress around here and it clearly ain't him. am i wasting my time? we've known each other for so long, we are comfortable with each other other, if we dated other people we'd both be crushed? but i don't think we have the same goals.

may - delia still in the office. she's afraid of calling customers to tell them about deliveries. she's afraid of talking to drivers. she was so hard to train because she WOULD not pick up the phone. and she ate all the snacks in the office. and she ordered so much so stuff for herself because it was free. 5 months in and she was still afraid to talk to people. maybe this isn't the job for you? she got transferred out of my office THANK GOD

june - tensions rising in the house again. $$. getting married. my mom is getting on my nerves because she thinks i'm getting behind in life because i'm 30 and not married. and she wants me to get married BY my birthday in October or in December or by January. i'm not ready, i'm not in the mindset. she needs money, she also needs an ego boost of saying "my kid is married". i'm tired of coming home and walking on eggshells, wondering when she'll come and bother me. i'm tired of her sharing stress on me. i'm tried of her asking me for money all the time because i can't save. she keeps asking when i'm gonna bring jeff over but i never have because i don't want associating the good thing in my life with the bad thing. without the restaurant, she's even more annoying.

july - my mom started asking for $ again. A bulk of my check every month. my career and finances are finally getting steady because i'm in a nice groove now and i can save. stop asking me for money! the shitty thing is i found out my sis was slowly moving stuff out (she found an apartment of her own in may , i also found a house.) but she was denying it smh rude. my mom stopped me from moving out but not lili because i'm soft. and because "i owed her an explanation about jeff" . i don't owe her shit and i don't want to tell her anything about my personal life.

i moved all my shit out on July 7th which was a Friday. I was in the middle of a move while mom called me and cheerfully asked about if we were going to RI over the weekend and i faked it. liz helped me move and got me stuff for the room. air purifier, clothing rack, a mixer, a clothing chest thingy. i'm so lucky to have her.

that whole day was was so exhausting and terrifying because i was trying to move all my shit out while she was at work. a few days before this sister and brother in law gave me a spare bed and desk for free. they also helped me rent a box truck to get all this over. forever grateful. but at the end of that friday night, i was so exhausting i was SHAKING. then i typed out a long text message to my mom and shut off the phone.

i was afraid to turn it out, i cried all night because what kind of daughter ditches her parents like that and lies? i was so miserable that first night and first week. i was on the phone with liz all night and she was about to come sleep over.

why doesn't my mom ever ask stan for money? god i'm tired.

哭完以后还是一条好汉。

august - my mom kept calling me but i kept ignoring her. i didn't read her text message reply but one message i read she said 你真的狗卑鄙. how dramatic do you have to be? you used me my whole life to work my entire life , denied me of many opportunities and i didn't have the balls to leave until my younger siblings left because i was still trying to be a good daughter. life goes on. went on vacation to Philly with Lili and Stan at the end of august. my roommates C and K are nice :) one is a teacher one works for the state. both nice and clean girls just trying to live out here. everyone is clean, respects each other's privacy and safe. K has a cat named Gnocchi who totally runs the house. i love him ;;

september - life is settling in to a nice groove. work. gym. home. 三点一线。C is taiwanese so we get along great - culturally + food ;; she asked me to go to the cat shelter bc she wants to adopt another cat. this was the right choice. i make enough $$ to rent an apartment like lili but still the bulk of one check. not that worth it. i'm so lucky i found this older house. we all have our own rooms and i got the garage spot. the house is also owned by the same landlord who owns the apartment complex behind us! lawn, snow all done by him! i made the right choice. to live with roommates and kind of experience that college life i never got to experience, except it's work and i go to work now instead of class. is it weird or nah. but it's a good feeling. i don't like to be lonely and jeff's not here and all my friends are doing their own things and we live every where.

october - birthday month! i'm 31 and i'm fucking old. life is good in terms i don't have to come back to stress or the pressure of getting married or giving up my pay check like i'm still in high school. started rewatching naruto yay. still learning how to be an account manager. drivers and alberto and james and joe piss me off . i'm still too soft.

somewhere between october and november , i visited pioneer again. i miss it so much. i miss making medicine.

november - made up with jeff. we're going to his friend chris's wedding in july , the same weekend as jeff's birthday. lili also gave me her gaming pc. been playing games :D jeff also recommended me some games to get. thanksgiving was chill. went to boston with chelsea. spent too much money and time was too short. yay.

december - all of a sudden, it's the last day of december.

K had an Xmas party two weeks ago. I invited Lila, Sara and Liz. We ended up watching 一念关山 in my room. Christine stayed in her room and didn't mingle. For both Xmas and New Year's Chelsea asked if I wanted to spend it with her family but on Xmas I spent it with sibs and right now, I've been sick since LAST Saturday. I'm so grateful to her because she knows i'm not with family.

started back our ksll group chat. i miss my friends.

All in all, this was a crazy year. but i think i'm happy.

2024 goals:

lose weight (specifically 40-50 pounds by July) it's gonna be rough ugh

amp up my resume. promotion? new job?

save money/be more responsible about money

have a healthier life style

travel more.

deuces.

here's to 2024 i guess.

[sarah-dipitous]

Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2023 Day 237

Our Little World/Xmas Special

“Our Little World”

Plot Description: a teen who’s lost her souls leads Dean to Crowley and a fast-growing Amara. Castiel sees an old acquaintance on TV, stuck in an earthly body

Would I Survive the First Five Minutes??: No one died…that we saw

Yeah, bet that won’t come to bite you in the ass, Crowley. “You’re strong, but I’m stronger” “…for now” how do you ground the Darkness and not think that that’s gonna come back around some day.

Oh good. Misha’s done with whatever he was up to that prevented him from being here.

Did Dean just tell Cas to go touch grass? He’s not wrong. My boy is looking rough, and all he has done is watch TV

Ok. So it took an extra episode for the Lizzie Borden fanatic to die ☹️

Oh. Oh, Cassy. He’s been watching reruns of trash tv to stave off his thoughts and memories 😭

The look, the horrible dawning realization that he’s found Metatron, and Metatron’s working as a camera operator for the news

I know this wallpaper. This is the wallpaper from the Changing Channels episode

We’re back to exorcising demons?? Wellllllllll maybe not

It’s important that a growing teen learn some good cat memes

I’ve been checking out the lamps in hell, and they are really nice. There are a bunch of like art nouveau shades, they’re gorgeous

Omg he’s not even doing it for the news, he’s like a tragedy paparazzi. He might even be orchestrating it

Man, if this old asylum is where Crowley’s been hanging out or has an entrance to hell…it REALLY shows how much wreckage Amara caused in the demon ranks

I’m glad that SOMEONE ELSE has addressed the fact that every time someone mentions (or I type) the Darkness, I feel like we’re talking about the band for a second…I do wish it was someone other than Metatron

I mean, maybe don’t bait Cas into hitting you, Mets

Sure, Crowley, we’ll call what you and Dean had BROmance

Yeah, i guess that when the Darkness said “we’ll always help each other” or something like that, it cuts both ways. It’s not just a threat to Dean. She’ll protect him too…or she’s just mad at Crowley. I dunno

I’ll piece together what the parallels of Cas and Sam’s fights mean at some point, especially since Cas had to be baited into fighting and then really went on the offensive and ends up not killing Metatron while Sam goes in looking for a fight, tries to be a pacifist, and ends up killing a few demons. Cas was also having visions back at the bunker and Sam…well, he’s having them now

The indignity of having to keep your phone charged IS rough, Metatron, I know…

I AM UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THE ENERGY WE’VE BROUGHT INTO HELL TODAY. Amara is very in love with Dean (who on this show isn’t?)

What is the lore in this show?!?! The Darkness is god’s SISTER??? (I can’t believe we’re getting this reveal when I’m so close to season 4 of Sherlock)

Why are you getting visions of the cage, Sammy??

“Xmas Special”

Plot Description: the Doctor and Clara are trapped on an arctic base and their only hope is Santa Claus!

Oh good, I waited til really late to watch another long dw episode

These elves are so mean to her!!

What a brilliant time for the Doctor to show up, seconds after Clara tells the very real Santa that she stopped believing in fairy tales

Is Santa a time lord? His sack of toys is obviously bigger on the inside…

You know what gets me about shows and movies that are meant to be for families that discuss the existence of Santa? And this might be a more recent phenomenon. But aside from the weird mechanics of adults who don’t believe in Santa still somehow finding presents under the tree from Santa on Christmas morning because of course he exists in this universe….but you’re also showing these shows to your like 5 year old who’s just learned through watching that there comes a time you stop believing in Santa even though they’re only now at an age where they can recognize Santa. It’s just weird and I have no idea if that paragraph made sense

Wtf is going on at this arctic base? Why can’t she look or think about these beings in the infirmary??

Ah damn…the Doctor and Clara fucked it up for these people. Whatever they were tying to accomplish, they just BARGE IN

LOW BLOW, DOC! You can’t bring up Danny, and you REALLY can’t insinuate that he’d be cheating on Clara. It’s too soon for her and it’ll pretty much always be too soon for her

Omg they’re really are gonna get saved by Santa…..he just sent an army of toys into this base

I’m usually not a huge fan of how Santa gets depicted in Christmas specials (not in a “this doesn’t fit my headcanon” but more in a “he’s just uninteresting” way) but this one’s at least a little fun and interesting.

I really think he’s a time lord

…I forgot they didn’t know they lied to each other…I forgot they lied to each other at the end of the last episode

I do love that they keep saying Twelve looks like a magician

He’s got a point…it would definitely be offensive, as an extraterrestrial, to find out we have a horror movie called Alien. Then again, we have a lot of horror movies named a lot of things, so…anyway “no wonder you keep getting invaded” is a good reaction

Ah, fuck. The Dream Crab got Clara.

I know this is the Doctor trying to save her, but in this perfect dream world, it’s super jarring to see the hallway walls turn into chalkboards with “DYING!” written all over them

Oh good. The Doctor has come to actually save her….excuse me?? He let himself get taken by the Dream Crabs too??

Huh…so the only way to kill them is to reject the dream

THEY DID AN INCEPTION?? The Doctor and Clara were in a dream but everyone’s been in a dream since the beginning? Since they all got into the infirmary??

He’s so against any real touchy freely stuff, and I am forever living for that

…nah, there’s still 18 more minutes. How…I don’t like this existential crisis they’re giving me “no one ever knows they’re not dreaming m. Not ever. Not for one second of our lives” don’t do that to my brain. Please

Stop physically reaching out to them!! What is wrong with you people?!

Have we really circled back to Santa’s real?? We spent a bunch of time proving he wasn’t real in the last dream, and he still might not be because this is still another dream but who knows??

This girl has an interesting Christmas itinerary. She’s gonna watch Alien and The Thing From Another World before her dad comes around. Then she’ll watch Miracle on 34th Street before what I can only imagine is a Game of Thrones marathon…and last “forgive Dave???”…which she’s somehow apparently already done that last one

Please tell me this isn’t yet another dream. What??? It’s been 62 years since they’ve seen each other??? It was another dream. When did Steven Moffat watch Inception? Did he wait four years? Because the number of levels of the dream were just too much. And then the tangerine at the end, like the spinning top.

[rosethreeart]

You or any followers have any tips on how to map a story for a comic when you have unmedicated adhd because i am suffering here lmao

Im so sorry I don’t know anything about making comics 😭

Hopefully some of my followers could help tho!

Here’s so tips I got from my script writing class which might be helpful!

I mean my assumption is that it would be similar to how you would go about writing any story. Create your outline for the course of the story / block out your plot.

Do a separate, more detailed outline/bullet point each “episode”

Do an even MORE detailed outline for one one you’re working on.

Write your script (scripts can be used even for comics!)

Once you got that done and revisited, try to make little thumbnail sketches on a duplicated document to get a vibe for how you might want that section to look!

For the adhd part:

do what works best for you! Somethings that might work for me might not work for you and that’s okay!!

Don’t overpressure yourself into trying to complete the whole thing or whatever in one sitting; you’ll burn out!

Try to set a deadline, and if you have anyone you feel comfortable enough to do this with, ask them to check in on you and your progress on that date!

Celebrate milestones even if their small! Could be with a small treat or a break or a pat on the back!

Sometimes having a body double can help so if you got a friend or anything/anyone you can have “in the background” even if it’s like a twitch stream it might help! Bonus points if they’re working on something similar to you!

I recently found out that putting asmr on helps me A LOT! So small background noises like that or lofi beats type of deal might also work!

PUT YOUR PHONE AWAY AND TURN IT OFF!!! The phone is the biggest distraction in the world, you’ll get nothing done if you’re checking it every five minutes!

There’s a study method where you do like 20 minutes of work and take a 5 minute break and take a 15 minute break every hour. This works and feel free to adjust the times!

If you’re feeling like your burning out for the day keep going for like 10-30 minutes and then see if you need to stop still. There’s no shame in packing it in early!

The worst thing you can do is beat yourself up! Adhd is a disability obviously so comparing yourself to the way NT or even other ND people work will do you no good. Everyone is different and needs to take things at their own speed there’s zero shame in needing to either slow your pace, stop, or go crazy and spring once in a while.

Hope this helped!

[fsos3105]

Technology Log Analysis

In my FSOS 3105 class, we were asked to record our use of technology for a full day. Following the completion of this log, I analyzed what kind of technology I was using, the duration, pros/cons, and how I felt about it. Here are my findings :)

Technology Log Analysis 

The night before I began my technology use log, I decided I wanted to estimate what it would look like based on my perception of how much technology I use on a daily basis. I took into consideration that it would be a Saturday and I would not be on my laptop or iPad as much as I would on a day I had school or work and that I would likely be on my phone more because I would have more free time. I also thought that most of my time actively using my phone (screen on and interacting with it as opposed to having music on in the background) would be on social media. Additionally, I knew I was going to a football game and that being there would probably cut down on my screen time. In the end, I estimated that I would spend about 5 hours using technology. 

As I was recording my technology usage throughout the day, I felt a little alarmed by how frequently my phone was in use. I tried not to alter the amount of time I was spending on it to keep my data as accurate as possible, but I did notice myself resisting the urge to check my phone more often than I would if I were not recording how much I was using it. I also noticed that a large portion of my technology use seemed to be for music. I found this to be a little relieving because I feel like my technology use is most detrimental when I am glued to a screen and mindlessly scrolling on social media or watching Netflix. 

In addition to what I was using and the duration of it, I also tried to pay attention to how I felt when I was using technology. I found that every time I opened my phone, one of the first things I would do was look to see if the guy I have been dating had texted me. My mood definitely fluctuated depending on whether or not he had texted me back. The intermittent reinforcement made me want to check my phone constantly and I had to stop myself from keeping it in my hand all of the time. Similar to findings from Duran et al. (2011), I found that I was often frustrated by the lack of connection due to his inconsistent communication via text message. 

When I was on social media, I enjoyed connecting with my friends and seeing what people were up to. I saw that one of my high school classmates got engaged and then I spent a while texting my friends about it. We bonded over feeling weird that people our age, 19 and 20, were getting married and having children. Over text, I bonded with my friends and solidified plans with my parents for them to pick me up at the airport for Thanksgiving break. I felt relieved afterwards that we were able to figure everything out. 

After totaling up the amount of time I had spent using technology, I was very surprised to see that I had racked up eight hours of use over the course of my day. A third of my 24 hour long day was directly impacted by some form of screen time. When I looked closer at what I was spending my time on, I noticed that a lot of that time was spent on Spotify and my phone was not turned on nor was I looking at my phone. After disregarding the time I was not actively looking at a screen, my use came down to about 5.6 hours which was much closer to what I had thought I would end up with. Still, that is almost a fourth of my day interacting with technology and half of the time that I was actually awake. 

Looking at those numbers, I have to ask myself if all of that time interacting with my screens was worth it. The amount of time I spent working on assignments is justified and I still could have spent more time doing that. Texting and planning with my friends and family was useful and necessary for safety and for being able to meet up together. The 35 minutes on social media is, truthfully, much lower than it would have been if I had not been at the football game that afternoon. In a different setting with my friends, such as in my apartment or getting coffee, I would have spent much more time on social media apps such as Twitter and Instagram. The amount of time I spent on Netflix could have been excessive. I like to use it to wind down and get ready to sleep but I think that the amount of blue light I am exposed to is not helping with the quality of my sleep and contributing to a cycle of not sleeping well, being tired and stressed during the day, and then watching T.V. to unwind. 

From observing my own screen time, I can see that listening to music and keeping in contact with my friends and family are the most beneficial forms of my daily technology use outside of school and work. I enjoy these activities, they do not keep me on my phone excessively, and do not disrupt my life. When applying this to families, it makes me think about how they could integrate the use of technology for connection and minimize negative effects such as becoming withdrawn or disconnected from each other. 

Because playing video games as a family has been shown to foster connection in families (Voida & Greenberg, 2012), I believe this could be extended to other types of technology use within a family. Similarly to my experience by myself, sharing and listening to music as a family could be an effective way to use phones or computers to bond with family members without having to be constantly interacting with a screen. That way, people with concerns about the amount of time they are using technology such as parents of young children and anyone who is conscious of their technology use can interact with members who are more inclined to use it.

Overall, I am a little surprised about the amount of time I spend using technology in one day. However, I am not necessarily displeased with how I spent that time. A large chunk of my time was schoolwork, music, or purposeful connection with friends and family. Because most of the things I was doing were beneficial for me academically and socially, I feel like my overall usage was positive.

Sources

Robert L. Duran , Lynne Kelly & Teodora Rotaru (2011) Mobile Phones

in Romantic Relationships and the Dialectic of Autonomy Versus Connection, Communication

Quarterly, 59:1, 19-36, DOI: 10.1080/01463373.2011.541336

Voida, A., & Greenberg, S. (2011). Console gaming across generations: Exploring intergenerational interactions in collocated console gaming. Universal Access in the Information Society, 11(1), 45-56.