#and also like… to pick her brain about stuff from my childhood that I could use more context for sometimes

[peachyykira]

.

[gurugirl]

Truth or Dare | slumber party!h

Summary: Y/n's coworker, Harry, has never been to a slumber party so she decides to remedy that and give him a sleepover he'll never forget.

A/N: Based off this request. Thanks anon! I hope you enjoy!

Word Count: 6,752

Warning: smut

. . .

By her third glass of chardonnay, her stomach was feeling the acid from the wine but she was having such a good time talking to Harry from the operations department that she didn’t care. She’d have another before calling it a night. Just one more glass so she could sit with him a little longer and listen to him talk and watch as he ran his finger along the edge of his pint glass.

He was probably looking at her like he was because he was also three pints of lager in and he was kind so he was holding eye contact to be polite. Certainly, it wasn’t because he found her attractive (though she’d have welcomed that).

The company’s management meeting was long over and everyone else had gone home but Harry and Y/n stayed for another round. They rarely ever got to talk at the office. She’d always wanted to pick his brain about why he decided to move to the US and how, of all companies, he chose to work at Dunn Services.

Y/n laughed on cue as he mentioned something from his childhood with his sister having her friends over to stay the night. He grinned, a healthy row of teeth aimed at her before he looked down and laughed at himself, “In truth? I never did have a sleepover or anything like that.”

“Really? Surely you had friends…”

Harry nodded, “Oh yeah I had a lot of friends. But I never stayed over at anyone’s and they never came over to mine either. Just… I don’t know. Never happened.”

Placing her nearly empty glass down she turned and waved with a smile as the waitress walked by, “Can we get another round, please?”

“How are you getting home?” Harry asked when she faced him, crossing her leg over her knee toward him.

“Taxi. You?”

“Might walk. I’m not far from here.”

Nodding she placed her elbows on the table, “So, I think that you’ve missed out on an integral right of passage, having never had a slumber party. You should definitely remedy that at some point. I highly recommend a fun sleepover. In fact, if you need pointers on what to do during a sleepover, I’m your gal.”

“Oh yeah? What’s your go-to during a slumber party?” Harry teased before taking another sip of his beer.

“Well, I think there are like two main components. The first is entertainment and I’m always keen on a good movie, or a dumb one, either way… a movie for sure if I’m picking. Some people like to play board games or whatever, but I like to stuff myself into a pile of blankets and pillows and just lie, or drape,” she spoke using her arms to demonstrate herself draping into pillows. “Occasionally, if the mood is right, I’ll enjoy a little truth or dare.”

“Got it. A movie and maybe if the mood is right, truth or dare. And what’s the second component.”

Y/n crossed her fingers together and raised her brows as if she were about to say something very important, “Snacks. Beverages. Good ones. Usually just small bites but here’s my list…” She cleared her throat, “Buttered popcorn, and possibly potato chips. Definitely something chocolatey, and maybe something like a cookie or a snack cake. If not potato chips then tortilla chips and if it’s tortilla chips, salsa should also definitely be on the menu.”

Harry held back the laugh in his throat as he nodded, “Wow. Okay. What about like a burger or Chinese food? Would that be allowed?”

Y/n shrugged, “It’s your party. You can do what you want. I’m just telling you what I’d do and what would be a hit with your sleepover buddy.”

Harry breathed out a laugh. Y/n could tell he was getting bashful. She wondered if he was thinking the same thing she was. She watched him for a few seconds before the waitress returned with their drinks.

A quick gulp of wine and she nudged at his shin with her shoe, “You wanna have a slumber party with me?”

Harry blinked and tilted his head, “What? You mean… Seriously?”

She shrugged, “Why not? Then next time someone asks if you’ve ever had a proper slumber party you can say that you have.”

He laughed loudly, his husky voice was like music to her ears. Pointing at her with his finger he grinned, “Now how I can argue with that? I mean,” he shook his head, a glint in his eye, “Every time someone asks me if I’ve been to a slumber party and I tell them I haven’t, it’s such a disappointment! The look on their faces when they realize my whole childhood was a sham…”

They both laughed, leaning in toward one another, tittering toward the edges of their stools.

Harry tilted his head, “Actually I think it sounds fun. You just name the day and I’ll be there.”

Y/n smiled at him. She knew it was crazy. Having a grown man at her place for a slumber party. Typically adults didn’t have those kinds of sleepovers – it was usually with the intent of something far more salacious. But she’d show him a good time, she thought, raising her glass toward his, “Deal.”

.                 .                 .

Y/n had her sofa bed pulled out and piled high with extra blankets and pillows. She had all her favorite snacks plus she ordered cheeseburgers and fries for the guest of the night. It was silly. Truly she hadn’t had a real slumber party in ages, but she couldn’t help but feel a little bit of excitement that she’d be hanging out with Harry all night. It was possible that her small crush on him was making her feel all giddy but she’d push down that feeling until he gave her any extenuating signals.

Because the truth was that they were both single, young adults and this was such an unlikely scenario. No one would look at this and say Oh how cute of these two grown adults hanging out in bed together for a sleepover. So innocent! No, she knew better. While maybe nothing would actually happen it certainly wouldn’t look innocent.

And of course, she did pick out the perfect pijama set. Something a little more flattering on her body but not too hey I really need to get laid tonight. It was a happy compromise. Cotton shorts and a button-up, matching short-sleeved top. This was just supposed to be a slumber party after all.

Right?

Besides, the little paper invitation she gave him on Monday morning told him to arrive in his sleepwear so she had to look the part. And not to toot her own horn but she made a very cute invitation just for him tucked into a pink envelope with a separate little response card that had space at the bottom for him to mark yes or no if he could come. It was a yes. Obviously.

When Harry finally arrived he was wearing a pair of grey sweats and a white t-shirt. And for some fucking bizarre reason he looked so much hotter than he did when he wore his well-fitted suits at work.

Because goddamn did his shirt somehow just hug his torso in all the right spots and it allowed her to take a good look at all tattoos on his arms that were normally hidden under brushed wool jackets or long-sleeved button-up shirts. She knew he had tattoos. She’d seen him roll up his sleeves a couple of times but she never wanted to be rude and stare for long.

And then the sweatpants, while loose in the legs, fit his waist and hips and…

“You okay?” Harry was still standing in the doorway with his backpack draped over his arm waiting to be invited in.

“Yeah, sorry. Not used to seeing you dressed down like this. Almost unrecognizable.”

Harry let out a soft laugh, his eyes crinkling as Y/n stepped aside to let him in, “Would you like to see my ID? Swear I’m the Harry Styles, the guy you invited over for chips, popcorn, and truth or dare. I’ve even got your invite somewhere in my bag…”

She breathed a laugh through her nose and watched him enter into her space, “Movies too. Oh, and I also ordered cheeseburgers. Remembered that you mentioned that.”

He seemed quite pleased with the burgers as she handed him the bag. She got those small ones, five to an order, “Thanks. Fries too, huh?” He reached into the bag and pulled out three crinkle-cut french fries then stuffed them into his mouth.

“So should we settle in and pick out a movie?” She gestured toward her couch.

Harry had seen the pull-out couch with heaps of pillows and blankets when he walked in. He knew that that would be where they’d be spending most of the evening. It was the glaring thing about the whole slumber party slash sleepover. That they’d be probably sleeping next to one another. As two young, healthy, attractive adults.

“Sure,” he nodded and waited for her to pick which side she was going to take before climbing in next to her, the thin mattress and metal frame giving way gently under his weight before he leaned back against a mountain of pillows, bag of burgers safe in his hands.

Y/n had a few video streaming services at the ready and they settled on a cheesy comedy from the late 90s before Y/n reached over to her coffee table and then lined up all the snacks between them.

They chatted a little, having both seen the movie already. Topics were anything from what their plans were for the rest of the weekend to what they’d eaten for lunch at work. And it was only a little awkward when they both reached into the bowl of M&M’s at the same time, fingers brushing together.

Harry moved his hand away, “Sorry. You go…”

Y/n grinned at him, scooping a handful of candy into her palm, and then sat up, adjusting her seating as she crossed her legs together, “Wanna do truth or dare? Pretend like we’re 15 again having a sleepover. Really get into the whole slumber party vibe, ya know?”

Harry dug out a few M&M’s and let out a chesty laugh, “If I’m 15 again we’re in big trouble.”

Y/n snorted a laugh, “Why? What do you mean?”

He shook his head, a wide grin on his face with deep set dimples carved into each cheek as he turned his head to look at her, “If this were happening when I was 15 I’d already be in the bathroom hyperventilating and probably trying to will away a boner after our hands touched in the M&M’s bowl.”

Y/n guffawed and threw her head back, nearly choking on her bite of chocolatey candies as Harry laughed with her. Honestly, it was the best icebreaker she could have asked for. Things had been kind of clunky between them up until that moment as they were still trying to navigate how to act around one another. And she knew he was teasing but the good belly laugh that she got from Harry’s story was exactly what they needed.

“Okay fine. We’ll just keep going about it as adults then. No fifteen-year-olds here tonight,” Y/n chuckled as she shoveled a few kernels of popcorn into her mouth.

Y/n kept her eyes on him as she chewed her mouthful, “So truth or dare?”

Harry cocked his head at her, “So the mood is right then? For truth or dare?”

Y/n’s brows furrowed, “The mood?”

“Yeah. You said it over drinks. Remember when you were telling me what the most important components are to a sleepover and you said you liked truth or dare if the mood was right.”

Nodding slowly, she thought back to what she’d said, “Yeah. I guess I did say that. And I mean… I think the mood’s right for a little truth or dare. Movie’s almost over and you just pretty much kicked us off with that truth.” A breathy laugh was pushed from her mouth.

She could tell Harry was mulling on another question as he bit the inside of his cheek, head tilting in agreement, “So that means it’s your turn. Truth or dare?”

Biting her lip as she pondered, she pressed her back into the soft pillows behind her, “Truth.”

Harry shifted to his side, long legs stretching the length of the mattress as he propped his head up in his hand, a pillow under his arm, “Have you ever kissed a co-worker before?”

Scoffing Y/n moved to her side, mimicking Harry’s position on her side, “No,” she grinned. It was true. She’d never once done anything with any of her coworkers. Having Harry over at her house was the closest she’d ever gotten to doing anything like that. “Now you. Truth or dare?”

His green eyes slid over her features, “Truth.”

She laughed to herself, trying to think of something funny, “How many stuffed animals do you own?”

Licking his lips he nodded, “Think maybe two? Gifts from my niece… Truth or dare?”

“Mmm… dare,” she giggled.

Harry lifted a brow, “Ahhh… feeling bold yeah? Okay… hmm…” He pursed his lips to the side as he considered the dare. “Read to me the last text you sent to anyone. And you have to show me to prove it was the last one. And it can’t be any texts you and me, cause that’s not fair.”

Y/n blinked. She wasn’t exactly sure what her last text was besides Harry. But she was slightly worried because if it was what she was thinking… lifting up her message app she scrolled down to the text thread below Harry’s and it was a text with her sister. Which was what she had been worried about. She gulped, hoping that the things she said about her “coworker” who was coming to stay with her weren’t the last things she and her sister texted about.

Puffing out a breath she covered up all the previous texts to show Harry the last text from her sister – God knows you need it. Sending you good vibes, sis ;)

Harry squinted as he looked at the message and pointed, “That’s to you. The dare was to show me the last text you sent to someone. Let’s see it…”

Feeling her neck heat up she angled the phone away from him and read what she’d sent her sister. And there was no mention of Harry but if he were even halfway decent at picking up clues he might be able to figure out what was being discussed prior.

She shook her head and looked up at him. She couldn’t believe she was about to show him what was on her screen. But a dare was a dare. What was the worst that could happen?

lol I doubt anything will happen but I wouldn’t turn him down. Got condoms just in case 😜 send all your good vibes my way

Harry’s brows squished together as he looked at the text and back to Y/n and then down again at the words on her screen. She saw his throat bob and she knew the look on his face. He fucking knew what that was. He had to know.

She had to look away. She pulled the phone down and killed the screen. The awkwardness between them thick and uncomfortable as she peeked back at him. The edge of his mouth was pulled upward in a smirk, “That’s to your sister?”

Nodding she blew out an exasperated breath, “Your turn. Truth or dare?”

Harry grinned as he positioned his knee closer to Y/n, his eyes still on hers, “Dare.”

Swallowing her embarrassment down the best she could she decided to ask him the same, “Now show me the last text you sent anyone besides me.”

Harry’s smartass grin told her all she needed to know. That his last text probably wasn’t nearly as risqué as hers.

And it wasn’t. Not even close.

You can have two pounds for free. I’ve got so many growing I can’t keep up. As long as you come to pick them up on Monday they’re yours.

“I have a bunch of zucchini growing in my garden,” Harry pulled the phone away and laid it down next to his hip. “Got a neighbor who wants some.”

Of course, his last text to anyone was about zucchini. Jesus, she was so far out of her depth.

He was still wearing that shit-eating grin as he said, “Truth or dare, Y/n?”

And the way he said her name, all slow and sexy-like had her insides heating up. Well, maybe she made up the sexy part but he was definitely teasing her. She could just feel it.

“Truth.”

She was sure she’d regret that. Truth or dare. It didn’t matter. She was still reeling from showing him her texts.

“Was that text about me?” Shit-eating grin in place as he asked. Fucker.

Y/n’s eyes grew wide dropping her mouth open in surprise. Of course, he was going to ask that. Of course!

“Oh come on, Harry…” she pleaded.

He lifted his brows and awarded her a larger grin with those cute indents scoring into his cheeks, “Them’s the rules, baby. You chose truth and now you have to be honest.”

Clearing her throat she sat up to her bottom and leaned forward so she didn’t have to look at him as she put her head in her hands and laughed in disbelief, “Jesus. Seriously?”

“Yep. Spill. Let’s hear it.”

“Okay. Fine. Yes. It was about you.”

Keeping her eyes on her lap she waited for a smug remark. Some kind of teasing reply but it was quiet. Slowly she turned to look back at him and he was still lying on his side, head in his palm as he watched her, his eyes fixed to hers.

She shrugged, “Your turn. Truth or dare?”

Harry flattened his lips and squinted at her before cocking his head, “Hold on… Really? That was about me?”

Sighing she rolled her eyes, “Yes. Sorry. I was… it was just funny… it was me joking around with my sister is all.”

He blinked and looked down at the space between them as he nodded, “Okay. I see. So you didn’t actually mean it?”

“Well… I guess… We were joking. Obviously, nothing has to happen. I would never expect that. I…” she breathed out exasperated.

“Obviously nothing has to happen. Did you want it to happen?” His pupils were pinned to hers again.

Opening her mouth she stopped herself for a moment. She knew her answer was yes but she didn’t want to come off like a creep. She hadn’t expected it and assumed it wouldn’t. But the truth remained; she hoped it would happen.

Deflating her posture she laid back to her side to face Harry, tucking a pillow into her chest, “The truth is that I think you’re attractive and I haven’t been with anyone in kind of a long time and… she knows that, my sister. So we were just… it was lighthearted but yeah I mean… without any expectations, cause I would never… I hope you know that. But I did think it would be nice.”

“Nice. Yeah. I agree. It would be nice. And just so you know,” he swung his head to look over his shoulder before looking back at her, “I brought condoms as well. You know… just in case.”

She was a bit stunned at that. Was he…

“Dare me to kiss you,” he grinned, irises dropping to her lips for a second before looking back into her eyes.

She laughed, “That’s not how the game works. The rules are you can’t–”

“Fuck the rules. Dare me to kiss you.”

Shaking her head with a wide smile stretched across her face she felt like her skin was pricking as her heartbeat picked up. She couldn’t believe this was actually happening.

Looking back into his eyes she inhaled deeply, “Fine. I dare you to kiss me.”

Harry’s smirk was unreal. The way he dragged his gaze over her face and down to her mouth was almost lewd, “Didn’t need to play truth or dare to get me to kiss you, Y/n,” he scooted in, grabbing the pillow she had tucked into her chest and tossing it away before he drew a hand up to her face, “You just needed to ask.”

She held her breath as he closed in slowly until it was as if all the tension in the room had popped and fizzled when his lips met hers.

He was so soft and gentle. Lips winding easily, carefully at first. And then she parted her lips more, kissing him back and letting her mouth press into his bottom lip before their tongues were meshed.

She moved her knee out to stabilize herself and knocked over the bowl of popcorn between them. Laughing into his mouth she gasped as she parted from him but he only reached for her again, placing his palm at the back of her head to pull her mouth back against his with a grunt from his chest as he pushed the bowl away and drove his arm underneath her side to keep her from getting too far.

Harry was softly moaning as his tongue worked its way into her mouth gently. It was clear he’d wanted to kiss her. That he liked it. And that notion made her head spin combined with the feel of his thumb traveling over her jaw. There was not going to be any stopping the momentum that had begun.

Well, except for when the bowl of M&M’s poured out against her leg. She had to push at him. As much as she would have loved to have kept making out, she would not have been able to enjoy melted chocolate on her legs or the bedsheets tucked around the mattress (think of the scrubbing she’d need to do!).

“Sorry,” she panted and looked down at the smashed pieces of popcorn and the chocolate candies strewn between them, “I’ve gotta pick this up. Our body heat will melt all these and it’s gonna be a big mess.”

Harry grinned, “Why don’t we just move this party to your bed for a little bit? Clean up later? The M&M’s won’t melt if we’re not laying on them.”

She laughed, already feeling overwhelmed and overheated from the kiss and now he was suggesting taking it to her bed? This was really happening, wasn’t it? She nodded and they both moved off the sofa sleeper to their feet, Harry following behind Y/n as she led him to her bedroom.

She already had her bedside lamp on. Bed made perfectly, everything tucked in and neat.

She turned to look at him and he stepped against her, palm splaying at her low back, “I dare you to get onto your bed and take your clothes off.”

A small laugh burst from her chest, “Oh, so now we’re just doing dares?”

He nodded, “Making up our own rules for this game. S’more fun this way.”

Letting go of her he watched as she stepped backward toward her bed and began to unbutton her nightshirt until it was shed from her body before she pushed her shorts down her legs. She was left in a pretty white bralette (something soft for bedtime) that stretched around her breasts and a pair of thin cotton panties that matched. She kneed up onto her bed and let her feet dangle off the edge and pointed, “Now I dare you to take off your clothes.”

He peeled his white t-shirt off, his hair mussing in the process. She watched with her lips parted at the gorgeous man stripping before her. Not only was he built exactly like what she dreamed of (tattoos, beefy, muscular, a touch soft, very masculine) but the boner tenting his sweats was hard not to home in on.

Harry stuck his fingers into the waistband and looked up at her, “M’not wearing any underwear, so be warned…”

She swallowed as the material lowered, belly button, happy trail, a bit of dark hair and then he pulled the stretchy waistband away from his body so his cock could push free and she was already clenching at just the sight as he removed his sweatpants, cock full and heavy between his strong thighs.

Jesus Christ.

Harry stepped forward, nudging himself between her knees and she leaned back to look up at him, “I dare you to take off the rest of this. Since I’m completely naked feels only fair.”

She bit her lip and looked down at his girthy dick. He was clearly not shy of his body, standing there like that, cock right in front of her. But why should he be shy when he looked like that?

Scooting back further into the bed she got up to her knees and pulled the bralette off first, feeling the heat of his gaze on her tits as she then slid her panties down her thighs. She wasn’t nearly as confident as Harry was as she quickly pulled at her top blanket and covered herself with a small laugh.

Harry stepped forward, one knee on the mattress before climbing in next to her, nosing at her cheek softly before his lips were connected to hers again. And she melted into him just like before. His mouth was magic or something because before she realized it, he’d pulled the blankets off her body and he had a big palm sliding up her thigh and over her hip, “Don’t cover up. So pretty. Knew you would be.”

She pushed her fingers into his thick wavey hair and felt her side hit the mattress as Harry pulled at her again, mouth still smeared against hers. He grabbed at her thigh, hitching it over his hip as he tucked in closer and it was warm and she could feel it. Feel him against her hip.

His giant hand smoothed against her bottom and up her spine until he was wrapping his long fingers around the back of her neck. Y/n nudged in closer, driving her hips forward until she was practically straddling him. So Harry took that as his cue to move to his back, taking her hips in his hands so she’d follow with him.

It had caught her off guard, the sudden change in position but her lips never stopped moving with his. Their kisses were wet and she could smell their saliva, and a touch of onion even from the burgers he’d eaten.

He guided her hips down, his thick cock hot under her thigh until she felt her pussy drag against warm skin at the base of his dick. A small gasp escaped her mouth as he pulled her up, letting her pussy glide up his length, “So wet already, Y/n…”

She was. It was embarrassing. Every inch of his shaft her pussy dragged against, coated him, wetted his skin. He kept pushing and pulling at her hips, using her slippery pussy like a soft wet toy he could run up and down his length.

Then she felt his fingers move around to her backside, digits sliding against her pussy as he licked into her mouth.

Gently she rolled against him and when she moved herself further down he pushed a fingertip inside, “Go on. Fuck yourself on my finger a little bit,” he whispered against her mouth.

He was filthy. She had no idea. He’d always been so sweet at work. So polite and respectful. But here he was reaching around her ass to get a finger inside of her cunt as she rubbed her pussy over his cock.

She panted into his mouth as she slid down around his finger, her clit smushed into his dick, slippery as she rolled up and down. But then he began to assist as he added another finger and began to fuck into her pussy, letting his digits curve into her the best he could from his angle. Slushy wet, she stopped moving her hips and parted from the kiss as she looked down at him. She could tell she was gushing all over his palm and probably his dick as she moaned.

“S’that feel good. You’re gettin’ my fingers all wet like it feels good.”

Nodding she gasped, “Yeah. Feels so good…”

Harry rutted up against her, his cock still pressed into her clit, and she panted, eyes still searing into his. She didn’t want to look away. She almost couldn’t believe he was in her bed fingering her like that.

“Your turn to dare me to do something. What do you want, Y/n?”

She moaned and closed her eyes. She was certain of what she wanted as she listened to the way his fingers gushed with each plunge into her.

“Fuck… dare you to… put on a condom.”

She popped her eyes open to peer down at him as he slid his fingers out of her, wiping her arousal on her ass, “They right here?” He moved his hand toward her bedside table, a knuckle tapping at the wood.

Climbing off of him she opened the drawer, “Yeah, a whole box. Hold on…”

Reaching over to pull out the condoms she felt Harry’s hands on her hips as he moved to sit up, then his lips were on her back, dotting warm kisses to her shoulder blades as she finally plucked a condom from the fresh box.

She watched him put the condom on and as expected, it didn’t cover his entire length. He was kind of a big guy. Well, maybe there was no kind of about it. Before today she had no idea he was packing like that. Though he always did come off as very confident and sure of himself.

She bit her lip as she watched him toss the wrapper away and then he kneed up to her, arm sliding to her back and carefully lowering her to the bed before spreading her legs apart as he fit himself there, sturdy thighs pushing against her soft ones.

“Gonna tell your sister her good vibes worked?” He smirked down at her, hands scouring her hips and tummy and then kneading softly at her tits.

Y/n laughed and reached a hand down to his knee before he pulled at her, making her thighs drape over his as he inched in closer.

“Hmm?” He was awfully teasing, she thought, grinning at her waiting for an answer.

“Probably,” she spit out in a laugh.  

Harry gripped at her thighs, lifting her a bit more to fit her bum over his bent knees and she wanted to scream in embarrassment when she realized he was inspecting her sodden vulva. She’d gotten herself all tidied up for him, should anything like this happen, so at least she had that going for her.

He smoothed his thumb through her pussylips, spreading them apart, and softly blew out a breath, “That is very pretty. Think we get him in there?”

She rolled her eyes as she watched him wrap his palm around his base and lay his fat cock over her mons, the condomed-tip reaching to her belly button, maybe further past, “Well, it’s made for it, so I’m pretty sure–”

“What… your pussy’s made to fit around my cock?” A cocky dimpled smirk gave way to a laugh.

“You know what I meant. It’s meant to… like…” she breathed out a laugh.

“Oh, I know… just fucking with you, Y/n.”

He gazed at her as he reared back, painting his cockhead through her labia, up and down, a soft bump into her clit before he repeated, spreading her soft lips apart as he watched the way his crown smeared her arousal between her creases.

When she moaned and wiggled her hips he pointed himself right at her little muscle, nudging softly forward, opening it up for himself. And she felt that first push, the way his tip fit into her, spreading apart and then stretching to accommodate his circumference.

“Oh god…” she breathed as he slipped in halfway and then pulled back.

“Almost there,” he panted as he kept his eyes on where they were connected, pushing and pulling back until she was swallowing him whole, his cock enveloped in her soft, warm pussy.

When he’d buried in whole, he moaned and watched her face twist up in ecstasy. Her lips were dropped open and her neck stretched long as she grasped onto the forearm of the hand he had gripping her waist.

Slowly he began to thrust, viscous liquid seeping from her pussy and sticking to his shaft. It was filthy. She was so wet that every time he bottomed out there was a splat and a plap sounding between them.

She let out a deep moan and her lips curled up, humid breath escaping her mouth as she felt him driving into her guts. He was taking it easy. Languidly fucking into her with wet claps every time he plunged in.

When her cunt was taking him easier and she was dripping down to her ass he moved in a little harder, faster. Angling himself over her, a palm down on the mattress so he could work into her with more gusto.

“Ah! Harry…” she squeaked at the stronger thrusts and clung onto his lats. He was panting, lips parted and pink, a curl falling over his forehead as he plowed into her splooshing pussy.

“Fuck you’re wet. Pussy is gushing, Y/n…”

Her brows pushed together as she gasped, her body knocked upward every time his hips met hers making her tits bounce. Harry didn’t know where to keep his focus. He loved watching his cock disappear into her hole but he kind of liked being right over her so he could see her face crinkle up every time he bottomed out and then her pretty breasts sway up and down. Or maybe he’d like to fuck her from behind, watch her ass jiggle as he pounded into her.

“Mmm… fuck that’s big!”

Harry groaned, “Yeah? Sure know how to sweet talk a man don’t you, pretty? S’hurt?”

She watched his face, a lusty grin, droopy eyelids as he continued muscling his way in deep.

She hissed when he bucked in, as if he was showing off just how deep he could push in and she coughed out, “Mmm… a little!”

Harry was going to lose his mind with her if she kept squeaking out moans and splatting around his cock like she was but he would be a gentleman and pull back a touch. Slowing down a little he sat up and moved his hand between them, smushing his thumb into her clit, which was so sticky wet even that swished and slid under the pad of his digit.

“Yessss…” she breathed out before murmuring on about how good it felt. “Oh fuck, that’s it. Oh god… please don’t stop… Harry, fuck, yes…”

The clit. The magical little nob that worked wonders as long as the man knew where to find it. Clearly, Harry knew right where it was. Knew how to circle over it, pressing against it just right. Knew how to fuck into her as well. Sliding his length through her vaginal walls, spreading her open, and grazing against her gummy little spot on the inside that had her buzzing and liquifying for him.

He watched her whine and squirm under him, loving how she was so into it. God that was an ego boost, “Like that, Y/n? Gonna come for me? Yeah?”

Her ears were already ringing when she lost herself, gripping around him and crying out as her orgasm washed through her tummy. Harry’s cock made her feel so full, so incredibly stuffed to the brim that it weighed her down and she could hardly move as he bulldozed into her, the pad of his thick thumb smushing fast circles over her throbbing nub.

Fucking her through it he gasped at how she spasmed and milked around him, her pussy trying to siphon his come right through his condom. But Harry wouldn’t come just yet. He had something to prove. Wanted to make a show of his prowess and give her something to tell her sister about.

So when she was finally calmed and her pussy wasn’t clamping around him like a vice grip he slid his hand under her head and kissed her gently, speaking low and soft against her lips, “Gonna have you flip over, okay? Just need a little more yeah?”

When he parted from the kiss she blinked up at him, fluttering lashes and out of breath, “You didn’t come?”

He shook his head, pulling himself out, gently before he placed his hands on her hips, “Not yet. I will soon, though. M’right on the edge. Won’t take me long.”

She rolled to her side as he lifted her hips and helped her get to her tummy. She felt his hands on her ass, squeezing and rubbing each meaty globe in his big palms. Then he was straddling her thighs as he spread her gently and she felt him push his thick tip back into her pussy, sharp and hot. It was tighter, felt a lot fuller like that as he began driving in deep and then pulling out to his tip, before plowing back into the hilt.

His moans grew louder and, even he could admit, sounded quite whiny, pathetic. He was shaking as he watched his dick spread her in half, her soft ass jiggling as he smacked into her, skin patting, his cock leaking precum steadily into his condom.

He hissed when it felt too good. His balls squeezing and his fat dick throbbing inside of her. He thrusted forward, landing a palm down next to her shoulder, his chest pressed into her back as he rutted himself in, tucking his cock through her insides and puffed out a hot groan into her ear, “Fuck you feel good. Gonna make me come, baby…”

She moaned and nodded, “Come for me, Harry…”

He might have held out for another thirty seconds, possibly a minute longer but her breathy words, all sultry and pleading had him pumping into his condom in an instant. He gargled on a moan and squeezed his eyes closed as he buried in and stilled his hips, ass flexing so he could push in further if it were possible.

Y/n felt him crushing her back as he collapsed over her, panted breaths in her ear, cock still throbbing in the aftermath of his orgasm.

She didn’t mind it. Liked his weight on her like that. Enjoyed the way he seemed just as fucked out as she was. She could even feel his heart pounding in his chest against her back.

With a moan, she turned her head and nuzzled her face into her blanket with her eyes closed. She’d fall asleep that way if he couldn’t get up. It was quite warm and comforting. Like a weighted blanket draped over her body. And maybe she did doze off for a bit because when she opened her eyes she felt him moving off of her before he crashed down next to her, the springs in her mattress bouncing under him.

Pushing herself to lie on her side she ran a hand over his chest and he turned to look at her, a dopey smile on his flushed face, “So this is what happens at slumber parties, huh? I’ve really missed out all these years.”

She giggled and nodded into her pillow, “Yep. They’re just like big orgies really. Normally there are more than just two people. It’s how I lost my virginity.”

Harry sputtered a laugh, “Really?”

Y/n couldn’t help but to cackle loudly and roll to her back, the biggest grin on her face, “No, silly. I was teasing.”

He slid a hand over her tummy, “So this isn’t what happens at slumber parties, then?” She could hear the cheeky smile in his voice.

She turned her head to look at him, “Well, not usually. But I think we made our own rules for this one today.”

“Yeah? Well, I have to give it to you. You throw a hell of a party. I’m certain this is gonna go down as the best sleepover in history.”

. . .

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[kayentokk]

Easy Peasy Sukuna Squeezey(Part 3);What Could Go Wrong

Pairing;Sukuna x Fem! Reader

Summary;What could go wrong during your weekend with Sukuna? Not much except one thing, or one person.

Contains;fluff, lots of fun, ex, sukuna gushing, childhood memories, some cussing

Wc;2,010

A/N;I am literally so sorry, tbh I forgot I made this a series 😅 and then I checked my comments and I was like oh. So my bad guys I will try to update this regularly and get my schedule back together. Also just comment on any of the posts for this series that you want to be tagged to get on the tag list. 

Tag list 🏷️; @charlie-xo

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The week felt like it took forever to be over, exams, loads of homework, part-time job, all that hectic stuff. But this weekend you get to-well you’re not really sure exactly what Sukuna has in store for you but whatever it is you’re excited for it. 

You had texted your roommate the day you were over Sukunas apartment that you’d be staying there at least until the weekend was over. You often stayed at Sukunas for long periods of time when you needed a break or just wanted to hang with your best friend. He never really minded you were pretty good company, in your own words, and he was used to spending long periods of time with you. During school, after school, in the summer, whenever your moms wanted to have a girls night, just whenever. 

Anyways your roommate was obviously cool with it, she had mentioned she wanted to have “company” over anyways so it all worked out. You took Sukuna’s advice and blocked your ex, you were probably going to do that anyways since the relationship was definitely over, so you have no idea if he’s texted or called. Not that you care though, he’s an ass and he should have enough shame, decency, and brains not to call and understand it’s over. 

To be honest you’re at the acceptance stage of grief, it is what it is he wasn’t the one for you, but it still sucks. Sukuna has actually been really helpful, he’s been, for lack of a better word, a great distraction. He won’t tell you what he has planned for tonight though, all he said was to be ready in pajamas. Maybe a movie night? 

You guys used to do those every Friday, but then college got too hectic with it being senior year and all. Sukuna said his classes are pretty easy, although you aren’t too surprised on that one he’s always been exceptionally intelligent, he claims it’s because he just decided to major in business since he’s not exactly sure what he wants to do.

He didn’t want to be a chef, even though he’s exceptionally talented in cooking too, but he’s a waiter at a restaurant for his part time job. When he first got that job you visited to see the restaurant, and him, it was a nice little quiet diner. He was annoyed and disgusted about it on the outside but you could tell he was embarrassed about you visiting, mostly because one time there was a couple that sat in the booth behind you and made comments about, “young love.” And every time you would sit in that same booth just to annoy him because you knew he thought about it each time, it was honestly hilarious. You and him? Being a couple? What a joke.

Sukuna texted he was on his way back, he had a lecture that was in the evening that day and he left a little early to start you guys’ weekend plans. Apparently you hadn’t been paying much attention to any calls or messages because you had about 10 missed calls from your friend and a dozen text messages. You immediately called back.

“Hello? Girl! Why have you not picked up, I’ve been calling you for forever.”

“I’m sorry! I was just laying here, and I had on dnd from when I was in classes earlier. I guess I never turned it off,” you replied in an anxious tone.

Mai just sighed before continuing, “anyways your boyfriend-“

“Ex,” you cut her off before she could even begin.

“Your ex-boyfriend,” she corrected herself with irritation, “has been showing up like every other hour asking about you, and I wasn’t paying much attention before but I’m pretty sure his car was outside yesterday for a while. He’s probably waiting on you, has he texted?”

“I don’t know if he’s texted I blocked him. That’s probably why he’s showing up, he thinks I’m home. Just ignore him, and if he continues to knock call the police or something.”

“Why can’t he just leave you alone? It’s clearly over, there’s nothing there anymore.”

“I know, I’m so sorry by the way.”

“You’re fine, enjoy your weekend babes! I just wanted to give you a heads up.”

“Thank you so much.”

“Mhm my company should be over soon, talk to you later, be safe.”

“Kk you too, bye Mai,” and with a small beep, the call ended. 

He was coming by every hour? How insane. You hoped he wouldn’t give Mai much trouble, but then again she could handle herself. What if he knew you were at Sukuna’s? Well he didn’t know the address….he’s dropped you off before though. Maybe he doesn’t remember it? Oh no what if he shows up?! And then your whole weekend of distraction will be ruined, and all of Sukuna’s hard work will be-

“-n? Y/n! Hey, Earth to y/n again. Seems like I’m having to do that a lot this week huh?” Sukuna jokes. 

“Hm, oh yeah sorry-“ you say lost in your thoughts.

“Uhh you sure? Why’re you all spaced out?”

“It’s nothing-“

“We both know it’s not nothing you might as well tell me, you’re not very good at your poker face I’ll have to teach you sometime,” he says playfully.

“It’s just- he showed up at my apartment. He was looking for me-“

“But you’re not there so what’s the problem?”

“Mai is there, which I’m sure she’s fine he’s not crazy he’s just a whore, but what if he shows up here?” 

“Wow never thought I’d hear you slut shame someone, that’s a new low y/n,” he smiles and then continues, “but you don’t have to worry about him showing up here. That is if he knows what’s good for him.”

Oh yeah one small thing, the time your ex dropped you off him and Sukuna did not get along. It was the briefest moment, it felt like when your dad dropped you back off at your moms’ after spending a weekend with him, but it was tense. You could tell, Sukuna’s sharp maroon gaze stayed on him even after you had stepped inside. So, safe to say he’d have to be pretty ballsy to show up here.  

“Put on some boots or something we’re going out,” Sukuna says gruffly.

“Going out where? I’m in pajamas-“

“I know, good. I told you to be, glad to know you listen.”

You scoffed, “no way I’m going in public like this-,” you gestured with your hands waving in an up and down movement to your unprofessional getup. 

“Relax. You won’t be the only one, I’m about to change too.”

“Oh because two of us looking like we just rolled out of bed is better than one,” you said sarcastically.

“Exactly, I knew you’d get it I had to admit I was getting a little worried there,” he teased.

“Oh shut up dimwit,” you said smiling.

There it was again, stunning.

Sukuna went to quickly throw on some sweats and an old faded t-shirt, probably sporting some random band. He grabbed his keys, and you were out the door. 

You loved night time drives, everything just hit different. The music vibed better, especially when Sukuna let you have the aux, the car ride is just more fun at night. When you arrived at the destination Sukuna parked the car and reached to turn the knob on the volume down.

“Look where we are,” he said turning to stare at you.

You immediately turned to look out the window, and even though it took you a second you realized-

With a big shriek and gasp you turned back to Sukuna, “this is-!”

“The ‘best convenience store ever in our hometown’ I know you said it to me so much it’s engraved in my brain.”

Sparkles were in your eyes, along with some unshed tears. So many great memories were here. Every time you passed a test with an A your mom would bring you here to get your favorite snack, and since Sukuna always did well on tests you’d take him about once a month to continue the tradition. But then you guys’ campus was at least a 35 minute commute from here, and when it was busy during the day maybe 45, so you stopped coming. There just wasn’t enough time and you guys got really busy. But not many people were on the road at night, and with Sukuna’s driving you guys probably made it there in 20-25 minutes tops. 

You were so happy you could scream. It was apparent in your face, the brightest smile. You jumped out of the car and immediately ran into the store, Sukuna not far too behind you. 

You had already grabbed one of the small dark green dingy looking baskets, ah the same as always, from the entrance and were halfway down your favorite aisle by the time he got inside. 

He greeted the kind old lady at the register who had witnessed your excitement just moments ago, screeching with joy, which scared her when you rushed in. 

He quickly found the aisle you were in and watched you decide which snacks you wanted, carefully picking the items and placing them in the basket. 

You rushed from one place to another, grabbing drinks, chips, snacks, anything you wanted because who knows when you’ll visit here again. Then you just stopped, and Sukuna watching your madness didn’t think you were ever going to. Then your eyes started to well up with worry.

“What’s wrong?”

“I- I left my wallet back at your apartment, I can’t buy any of this-“

“What? I’m obviously buying, dimwit,” he scoffed repeating your words from earlier.

“Really?” You asked, the excitement immediately perking back up inside you. 

He didn’t even get to answer before you continued happily on your shopping spree, how could he say no anyways? By the time you were done you couldn’t even pick up your basket. You quickly looked to Sukuna for help, and he rolled his eyes taking the basket with his left arm. You began to giggle watching him walk to the register. You couldn’t help it, the sight of him carrying a basket like a soccer mom was just too funny. 

A stuffed full basket being carried by his well built arm, the vein bulging from the somewhat strenuous task being carried out. His hand flexing and unflexing to stretch after putting the basket down, making the veins even more visible as they pop out due to his contractions-

“Y/n? You coming? Don’t you wanna get home to eat all this stuff?” 

You quickly snapped out of your haze, and ran up to the register where Sukuna had already taken his wallet out to pay, making a comment about how you were most definitely going to eat it in his car. You left a happy customer that day.

Before you left you made Sukuna stop in front of the shop so that you could snap a quick photo of the two of you together, you wanted to send it to your moms. 

You smiled the whole car ride home, and when you got in the house. 

“Thank you,” you said sincerely with a huge grin on your face.

“Yeah, yeah I know I’m the best,” he replied with a smirk.

“Can you cook the ramen please?”

“Who else was gonna-“

And then the shrill ring of the doorbell rang. 

“Are you expecting someone?”

“No, no one comes over here. Maybe it’s just a package.”

“At 10pm?”

“I don’t know, maybe some drunk has the wrong door.”

Then it rang again.

“Okay maybe not…”

“Sukuna just go get the door I’ll start prepping-“

Before you could finish your sentence though, he already opened the door ready to tell off the drunk.

“Oh. It’s you.” 

You didn’t like Sukuna’s tone, and being the nosey person you are sometimes, you rushed to the door. You immediately understood his tone. 

“Oh, of course it’s you.”

@/cafekitsune for the divider

[danikamariewrites]

Azriel x adhd!Reader

A/n: As someone with ADHD I struggle with a lot of stuff like my emotions and daily tasks. I like talking about it bc I don’t think it should be taboo and I hate the stigmatism around it that it’s just people being lazy. If your struggling with ADHD or any other mental health problems know you’re not alone ❤️

Warnings: mentions of mental health struggles, some angst

At first Azriel didn’t understand why your mood could be so up and down all the time. Or why you struggled with getting out of bed some days and others you had so much energy you didn’t know what to do with it.

You didn’t like loud noises, being touched unless you wanted too, and some textures overwhelmed your senses causing you to lash out.

You have a hard time communicating your feelings and he does too, which makes you both frustrated when one of you just brushes the other off or is passive aggressive.

Azriel notices you space out sometimes or that when he’s talking to you, you ask him to repeat things because you didn’t hear him. He thinks it’s odd but brushes it off as you just being preoccupied. He also picks up on your fidgeting but never thought anything of it

One day you both snap at each other resulting in the worst fight you’ve ever had

Azriel ends up going to Rhys for advice because he doesn’t want some stupid fight on a random Monday to be the reason you break up

Azriel tells his brother about the issues that have been building up over the last few months and Rhys, who’s been one of your best friends since childhood, tells him you’ve always been that way

He doesn’t go into detail, it’s your story to tell, but he does tell Az about when you were younger and your parents had Madja come give you a few tests. He remembered being a little nervous for you but you were fine. You just needed a little extra help and attention with things because your brain works differently

Azriel instantly feels bad that he didn’t know

“It’s ok Az, she didn’t even tell me until we were teenagers.” Rhys says sympathetically. “Yeah but I’m the one that’s supposed to be there for her, not get angry with her.” Rhys hugs his brother, insisting he stay the night and that time apart will do you both good

The next morning Az comes home to you baking in the kitchen

You had to move around or the thoughts of Azriel not coming home because you were too much of a burden were going to eat you alive

When you see him you try to apologize but he cuts you off asking if you could sit down and talk

“I don’t want to push, but Rhys told me about when you were younger and the testing with Madja.” He says gently

You take a deep breath, trying to blink your tears away

Sometimes it’s hard for you to talk about your ADHD because you hate to seem weak or different

But you’ve held back long enough and if you didn’t tell Azriel soon you knew you would get worse trying to mask it

You tell him everything. how your energy goes up and down, your depression and that it’s worse because you can’t find the energy to do things

You feel useless sometimes because you forget things or because you don’t listen

He hugs you as you cry into his chest, “I just feel so guilty being this way. I’m sorry Az.”

He brushes away your tears, “It’s ok my love. I know I don’t communicate well either. And I’m sorry, I didn’t know you felt this way. It must’ve been killing you to keep it in.”

From that point forward Azriel was always there to make things better

Your communication improved and fights or the silent treatment became very rare

You weren’t afraid to tell him if something was bothering you or if you needed extra help or attention from him

Azriel and his shadows could pick up if you were being overstimulated or stressed out, so there were times you didn’t even need to ask

If you were out with the group and became uncomfortable Azriel would take you somewhere quite to help calm your anxiety

He’d wrap his wings around you so it would be dark and quite, helping slow your panicked breathing

“It’s ok baby, take a deep breath.” “That’s it, in and out, don’t rush.” “Here feel my heartbeat, can we try and match it?”

If you didn’t like how your sweater or dress was feeling that day he would be there with a back up or give you his own

“Are you sure Az, I don’t want to take it from you then you’ll be cold.” “Don’t worry about me baby, I just want you to be comfortable. Plus I’m built for the cold, Illyrian remember?”

Whenever you start fidgeting it’s usually if you’re bored or nervous. Azriel always keeps a little fidget toy or a pen on him so you can hold it and focus your energy on that. He knows you hate being thought of as a distraction and you think it’s better to focus on a small thing in your hands rather than swinging your feet or pushing your chair around

You thought him knowing about your ADHD would change how he feels about you or treat you differently. You bring this up to him one night in bed, “This doesn’t change the way I feel about you at all. You’re still perfect to me, my love. You just need extra help sometimes and it’s ok to ask for help.”

[eepyuii]

frostbite — pt. 15

pairing ; childe x gender neutral!reader

content ; childhood friends to “rivals” to lovers, slow burn

cw ; none, dottore is mentioned but none of his hideous acts

notes ; WHATS UP SMART FELLAS AND FART SMELLAS ⁉️

I PROMISE IM NOT DEAD,,,, see the thing is that since i published the last chapter of this, i’ve done some crazy things like finishing and graduating highschool and studying and doing national exams and preparing to apply to colleges and yknow….. really normal, totally not time consuming stuff LMAO i can’t promise that i’ll be consistent again as i am still pretty busy with all that bizz but i’m very happy to have finally gotten a new chapter out

ANYWAY ITS MEROPIDE TIME BABEY ‼️ finally get to write my pookie wookie shmookie wriothesley, can u tell that i think he’s neat :3 can u tell that i am brewing up something with him :3 can u :3

also i HAVE OTHER WRITING PROJECTS COMING OUT SOONER OR LATER MORE LATER I PROMISE,,,,, currently cooking up something for whatever dungeon meshi-heads out there that r willing to enjoy it!!!!!

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this line could not be moving slower.

you’ve been standing here for so long— any progress forward is merely two steps further but your legs have long since turned to lead, making each movement arduous and achy. mind hazy and limbs sluggish as you drag your feet through the rusted metal flooring. the most likely cause for your sudden stagnation is the overwhelming pressure from being… however many feet underwater you are, as you haven’t had much time to adapt to that yet.

ironically, it almost makes you regret your decision and you hadn’t even truly gotten inside the fortress of meropide. perhaps this was some sort of intentional psychological warfare towards the new prisoners, some sort of initiation for the upcoming torments of their sentences. even so, you look back on the moment and think it was the best course of action.

you remember the way your heart dropped upon hearing the word ‘guilty’, the way it fell all the way down to your feet and picked its pace back up again, beating a hundred miles per hour. you remember the way you weren’t even given time to say goodbye, to reach out to childe as he rebelled against the guards and was immediately detained by the iudex.

the iudex… you become conflicted at the thought of him. part of your brain tells you that you should be angry and despise him for only letting you visit childe after he was reported to be missing from the fortress, under the guise of inviting you to investigate his disappearance. though… he was so kind about it. you must’ve visited his office nearly everyday to ask for permission to visit the prison, every time being met by the same answer of ‘it’s beyond my capabilities’, but each of them he remained utterly patient and civilized— something that you ashamedly can’t say that you did in return. and even so, he graciously offered to grant you a fake sentence so you could find the harbinger yourself, with the help of the traveler and paimon of course.

there was a certain air to monsieur neuvillette, one of silent melancholy and deep thoughtfulness. your first impression of the iudex had you recalling zhongli as a comparison, but now you’ve grown more certain that they have far more in common. neuvillette is most definitely not human, you’ve long since assessed that, but every time you get a look at his eyes while visiting his office, you notice an almost draconic appearance to them. perhaps that’s why you can’t fully bring yourself to dislike him— he reminds you far too much of you the fond friendship you’ve found within the consultant of wansheng funeral parlor.

there’s a shove to your shoulder that snaps you back into reality and you realize it’s your turn to have your mugshot taken. mugshot… what would your mother think of you now? both her own child and their childhood best friend having criminal records in another country— you can practically feel the pinching of your ear, even if the false charge was something as ridiculous as stealing lady furina’s cake. despite the flash of the kamera making your eyes sting, you do your best to maintain a neutral expression and wonder if the traveler and paimon had already gotten their turn and have long since installed themselves in the fortress. you especially wonder so when you’re left to venture the fortress of meropide alone, with only a room number and no knowledge of the prison’s system to your name.

“hey! you there!”

oh dear heavens, it’s already started— you’ve not stepped foot into prison for one whole minute and you’re already about to become a bullying victim. you swallow thickly and turn around meekly like a cornered rabbit. a particularly grumpy-looking guard is the one who calls you over, expression hard and stoic. you nearly consider begging him to not be mean to you like a cowardly little kid, but he speaks before you even get to open your mouth and spew anything embarrassing.

“you’re y/n, the new inmate, right? the duke wants to see you in his office.”

oh it’s so over for you.

perhaps you haven’t become a punching bag just yet but you’ve sure, somehow, irked the warden enough to be immediately sent to his office. oh gods… is it because you’re fatui? you heard there were quite a few fatui operatives already residing in the fortress of meropide— perhaps the duke has a particular distaste for your kind. the guard half-heartedly shows you the way to the duke’s office, the singular, imposing tower at the center of the fortress.

the silence inside the tower is deafening, the only sound heard is the clang of your steps against the metal stairs, almost as if you’re the only living being inside. the second floor introduces itself through the incredibly faint, almost innate herbal scent that wafts around you more and more the higher steps you climb. finally, it reveals an atmospheric office with bookshelves rounding the walls, a comfortable-looking sofa with a coffee table littered with teacups before it and in the grand center of the room, a wide desk— the last thing you register is the man sitting at it expectantly.

he looks nothing like you expected him to.

by the title of duke, you were picturing an older, posher man adorning expensive fabrics and a distasteful, condescending expression towards the ‘lower lifeforms’ of his prisoners. instead, he’s much younger and rugged, littered with scars, dark tones and sharp edges to his outfit— he almost looks like an inmate himself. despite not appearing necessarily condescending, the duke of meropide is still plentiful imposing, as his icy blue eyes and platform boots send a shiver through your spine when he stands up to greet you. he sticks out a hand and you instinctively flinch away, although the hand only hangs in the air passively awaiting a handshake.

“y/n l/n, prisoner 7458, it’s a pleasure to meet you. welcome to the fortress of meropide.”

oh… his tone is so casual and friendly, it completely takes you aback— like you’re meeting a friend on the street instead of the highest authority of an enormous prison as one of his very own prisoners. you scramble to shake his hand and awkwardly fall into some sort of bowing motion in the midst of you’re panic.

“a-ah yes! thank po you very m-much, your grace.”

with this proximity, you have no choice but to look at the duke’s face up close. he wears an easy smile on his otherwise seemingly hardened face, one that you can’t help but subconsciously think of as handsome. another juxtaposition to your expectations toward the duke is that, despite his rugged and troublesome appearance, he is quite well kept— as seen by his neat peach fuzz. he confuses you entirely.

the duke chuckles amusedly at your entirely perplexed demeanor.

“no need to be so nervous, this is a casual talk that i personally wanted to have with you, rather than a… part of the fortress’ welcoming ceremony. so please, have a seat, make yourself comfortable— i’ll prepare us some tea. oh! and call me wriothesley.”

you do as… wriothesley says and sit on the surprisingly cushy chair in front of his desk as he himself steps off to the side to make the tea. your mind is still running at miles per hour with everything that’s happened and with what might happen next, with what to say or not to say to the duke, with where childe, the traveler and paimon might be right now. not to mention the sickeningly sweet smell that fills your brain even further… this must be some strong tea. wriothesley sets a teacup in front of you and sits at his grand, tall chair behind the desk. he faces you with a bright smile that you force yourself to return, yet you still can’t help but keep the thought of this ‘casual talk’ having other intentions gnaw at the back of your mind.

“so, i won’t dilly-dally with what i’d like to talk about— as you may have noticed, the fortress harbors quite a few inmates from the fatui.” bingo. who knew that your blinded anxieties were actually right.

“all of them arrive here with similar ranks, under similar sentences for similar crimes. standard stuff, really… but this is the very first time we’ve gotten ourselves a sergeant.”

although the duke keeps up an easy-going and lighthearted demeanor, you can’t help but remain on edge. you feel once again like prey cornered by a calculating hound. the smell of the tea still plagues your mind with its unavoidable presence— what’s even worse is that the scent isn’t entirely unfamiliar to you, the memory is just out of your grasp, frustrating you even more.

“and even further, this is our very first time we’ve gotten ourselves a fatui sergeant whose crime was… to steal a cake from lady furina?” wriothesley briefly looks down toward a document on his desk to make sure he’s actually recalling your crime correctly. you barely listen to what he’s saying, still laser focused on recognizing this irking fragrance.

“adding onto that, it seems as though we’re receiving two new inmates today who are arriving on the exact same sentence for the exact same crime as yourself. seems a bit curious, doesn’t it?”

your attention is caught by the mention of the traveler and paimon and you shoot up in your seat.

“oh yes, those are my friends! a-are they okay? have they arrived yet?”

wriothesley is seemingly surprised by your sudden enthusiasm, as he chuckles with certain shock and amusement. he looks at his file once again, eyes trailing over to the two other prisoner registry’s below your own with a certain analytical hint to his gaze.

“i’m certain they’ll be arriving at the fortress shortly. in the meantime, why don’t you tell me how exactly the three of you managed to commit such a heinous crime?” he asks humorously.

wait!

you’ve finally recognized the scent… a lesser known tea leaf from liyue, with no real definitive name for itself— only truly studied within the medical field for being one of the few tea leafs to contain sodium thiopental, a barbiturate that slows the speed of the communication between the spinal cord and the brain, making high-functioning tasks such as lying harder to perform. a truth serum.

wriothesley has served you a truth serum.

so much for a ‘casual talk’. you’ve known the man for not even a full day, yet you still feel a sting of betrayal fermenting in your chest. but truly, what can be done when you’ll always have a big fat target on your back that labels you as nothing more than a fatuus? you’ve chosen this wretched bed, now you must lie in it.

and lie you will.

with a forced laugh, you feign a reminiscent smile. “a-ah, it’s actually quite silly— i believe it goes without mention that my friends and i are foreigners and still wildly foreign to fontainian customs. we were invited to a meeting with lady furina and monsieur neuvillette in the spirit of diplomacy but, ahah… i guess we were unfamiliar with lady furina’s predilection for sweets and just took one for ourselves!”

wriothesley laughs in turn, but you’re unable to discern how genuine it is. you watch his periwinkle eyes flicker briefly toward your untouched teacup and suddenly, the atmosphere turns into one akin to a game of chess— innately hostile and strategic, where both of you must be hyper aware of the other’s next move lest you make a mistake and lose your carefully constructed composure.

“i must say it is an unlikely set of circumstances…”

you subconsciously look toward wriothesley’s own teacup, seeing that his remains as unsipped as yours. with a chilling feeling, you look back up to see that the duke’s gaze was already fixated on you, which means he saw you checking his teacup. which means he knows that you know.

“though, i’ve got to ask… what exactly entails your position in the fatui? this is purely out of my own curiosity, as most of our inmates all come from the house of the hearth.”

you swallow hard.

“well… i’m head of the infirmary, that’s all my position is, really. the sergeant title is just a half-assed justification for how high my ranking is.”

the calculating hint to wriothesley’s gaze softens in the slightest amount possible and he lightly looks off to the side, as if reminded of something, or someone he knows by your answer.

“i work directly under the second fatui harbinger, il dottore. i’m somewhat his… assistant.” the word assistant leaves your mouth with a tinge of disdainfulness as your body almost instinctively tenses at the mention of… him. the duke picks up on it.

“the doctor, huh— haven’t heard much about him myself, but what i have heard seems like more than enough for me.” you can’t help but snort at that.

“do you like it? working for him, that is.”

you’re staggered into silence and a shocked expression— the suddenness of the question completely taking you by surprise. the speechlessness you feel is painfully reminiscent of when kunikuzushi asked you if you’d like to kill dottore. despite the answer being obvious to you, there’s a subconscious fear gnawing at your side that dottore might be out here listening, disguised as someone else or as one of his segments, living a false life. but you can’t allow yourself to live in fear of him anymore— his segments are gone and he’s pathetically stuck in zapolyarny palace by himself while you’ve been out and traveling miles and miles away from snezhnaya. kunikuzushi doesn’t fear him, so why should you?

you’ve always been terrible at bluffing, so fuck it— you might as well not bluff at all.

instead of answering wriothesley immediately, you lunge for the teacup and gulp down the entire thing, much to his surprise. the duke is stunned in return as he merely watches attentively for your reaction to the serum. the silence between the two of you is prolonged as you give the serum time to take effect. the taste itself is a delightful, slight earthy flavor— making it even more enticing to drink normally for one unaware of the leaf’s properties. you don’t feel any different after a few seconds, if not ever so slightly woozier. you breathe in and out deeply, letting the first answer that comes to your mind be the one that comes out.

“i take my job very seriously, your grace— i am a medic, my ambition is to save lives. and there isn’t a soul in teyvat that i would ever want to kill more than i want to kill him.”

the answer feels foreign and unexpected even to yourself. the first time you were asked such a question, before one who was once the balladeer and dottore’s experimental god, your answer was no. it felt easier to say no— to tell him you’d rather he be the one to end the doctor’s reign of terror, because for the most part it was true. but then kunikuzushi found closure, he found new life and prosperity in places outside of godhood or tormenting others or spiting his ‘mother’ or going after dottore.

and you, you stayed the same. you’re still suffocating within the grimy, clawed grasp of the second fatui harbinger. you’ve been through so much, visited four different nations within the span of the last year, fought an abyssal creature and an artificial, nearly god-like being yet you still feel as stuck as you did while you were still stationed in snezhnaya. you’re still stuck having reasons to want to kill dottore, kunikuzushi moved past his.

the duke still can’t find an immediate response, as he merely scoffs incredulously at what he’s just watched. you see a faint glaze take over his gaze when he looks aimlessly down at his desk, as if truly involving himself in memories of the past— his eyebrows furrow briefly, as though the memories he recalls aren’t good ones. something grips at your throat, an anxious feeling, as you regret being so impulsive as to reveal something so damning about yourself. to a prison warden, no less. you feel as though you’ve sobered up and feel the need to make up for what you said and excuse yourself, but before you can even open your mouth wriothesley is already standing from his chair.

“well i respect your honesty, sergeant. i’m afraid we’ll have to leave our talk here, as i have to welcome more of the new prisoners into the fortress, maybe even your friends will be amongst them— i’ll make sure to give them the word that you’re here.”

you nod briskly and scurry to leave the office while the duke insists on seeing you out himself. your head pounds with nervousness, and perhaps slightly with the truth serum tea you just downed all at once— so much so that you almost don’t notice wriothesley’s hand sticking out once again in a polite handshake. much less do you notice the fascinated studying scan of his eyes across your face as your hand meets his.

“and again— welcome to the fortress of meropide, y/n.”

you don’t sleep well on your first night at the fortress.

perhaps it’s due to not being used to the overwhelming pressure of the water, perhaps due to the lack of warmth that your metal surroundings bring, perhaps a side effect of the tea.

or perhaps… it’s because you dream of ajax.

at first, the dream is sweet— drowning in cheesy, tooth-rooting romance tropes dug from the most delusional corners of your brain, ones that you desperately tried to suppress after you got over your phase of reading romance novels as a child. you’re reliving the tension-filled moment inside your hotel bathroom from the other morning, where some mystical force had pulled you and ajax so close together you shared the same breath, getting painstakingly closer still. only this time, instead of getting interrupted by those guards, the scene keeps going… and going… until you truly, finally meet each other in the middle.

within the misty midsts of your slumber, it almost feels real— there’s a shock of electricity when your lips touch, your heart beats faster from even outside the dream, you can nearly feel the warm sigh of satisfaction that ajax lets out from his nose and onto your face. but it still isn’t enough, the tightness in ajax’s desperate grip onto the back of your head and on the small of your back aren’t present enough. the juxtaposition of his fiery warm skin against your own cold one isn’t contrasting enough, your skin doesn’t burn as fiercely as it does when you touch him in the waking world.

and soon enough, the dream shifts… shifts into scenes of ajax inside the fortress. you’re not lucid enough to find the images strange, as you’ve never seen him inside the fortress yet— so you remain stuck, watching as he sneaks past a plethora of guards to reach a decrepit tunnel, overridden with plant-life as it connects out into the fontainian sea. your vision starts to blend incomprehensibly like watercolors on wet paper, until all the remains is a blinding, blue mess and a faint whisper in ajax’s voice:

“something’s… calling me… i… i have to go…”

taglist ; @kentply @osaemu @rain-and-a-nice-nap @koichirana

and don’t forget to boycott this shitty game!!

[periwinkla]

Heya, pokeattorney anon here!

Glad to hear you're feeling better, let's hope that the road to full recovery continues smoothly. I'm so happy to see you posting art again!

I love the idea of Trucy with a little group of buneary assistants, that sounds completely adorable.

I also think pawmot is a great choice for Athena, I imagined her liking electric types, and it has a bunch of fur on its head that kind of looks like Athena's ponytail. I like it when a trainer and their pokemon have a similar color scheme.

I just realized that I forgot about Ema, but honestly your picks are perfect I have nothing to add.

I generally don't give legendaries either, but I thought that reshiram and zekrom were just too fitting. It would be pretty incredible and hype if reshiram showed up during the climax of a case, like aai2-4, when Edgeworth proves his dedication to finding the truth.

Now onto the important stuff, your BW AU is soooo big brained, I'm a massive fan of the idea! If you ever come up with more thoughts about it please please share! I would actually lose my mind if you drew something about it I think. There's just so much potential, imagine the ferris wheel scene! And instead of having Phoenix and Edgeworth be opponents in court, they could have pokemon battles, and Phoenix would show him that pokemon can form genuine bonds of friendship with people! Unnecessary feelings, but it's Edgeworth realizing that pokemon are so much more than battling machines, which is what von Karma probably taught him, and realizing that he didn't treat them the way they deserve! Unfortunately, I played BW too long ago, so the plot isn't fresh in my mind, I might be remembering some parts wrong. I think N used pokemon that were found nearby, I'm not sure if Edgeworth would do that? I think it's more likely that von Karma drills into him that strength is everything (like evidence is everything), so he'd use pokemon similar to him, then switch back to using his childhood team during the equivalent of aa2. Having him come back to kick Neo Plasma's ass would be so amazing, though I think that the time between BW and B2W2 could also be the 7yg, if that AU is for the entire series. There's so many ways this could go, and I'm very curious about what else you have in mind!

Again, very happy that you're making a comeback, take care of yourself!

Hi again anon!! Thank you so much!! <3 I'm happy to hear from you again :)

I also enjoy the idea of partner pokémon having matching color schemes with their trainers. It's just so very cute and sweet!

It's true, Reshiram/Zekrom fit them very well, and especially Reshiram during 2-4 as you said. I mean I guess if the courtrooms were bigger, they could fit them in. Although the judge would probably hide under his desk. Shaking in his robes. Poor guy.

Oh gosh the ferris wheel scene...!!!!!! Phoenix shaking because he's afraid of heights but going in anyway because it's a chance to be alone with Miles. Miles notices him trembling and he's like 'why on earth didn't you say anything?!'. Once they get off Phoenix feels like hell and probably empties all contents of his stomach and Miles needs to help him through it and they end up spending a lot of time together. Still, Phoenix thinks: 'worth it'. (also side note I know in the ENG ver Miles is said to be afraid of heights as well but it's not like that in JP)

Also yes, them battling it out. While bantering like they do in court. That's like. Narumitsu at its finest. Phoenix wants to make him realize that people can't live without pokémon, that it's a symbiotic relationship. The bond he shares with his mons is what made it possible for him to stand in front of Edgeworth in the present... And he wants to make him remember when they were children, and played with pokémon together.

As for what I believe Miles to think, there's a very long explaination below.

(you opened a Pandora's box here I hope you're aware)

BW are actually my favourite pokémon games, so I remember them fairly well. In BW's plot, Team Plasma's goal is to 'liberate pokémon from trainers', but that's actually just a front, as Ghetsis' true objective is to gain power by taking it from everyone else (ie. if no one has pokémon but he does, he's the most powerful). There are some Plasma members who are genuine, but there are some that much like Ghetsis use and abuse pokémon (there's an incident with them beating a Munna for example). I think von Karma would have more or less the same goals as Ghetsis: he puts up a front, telling Edgeworth that all pokémon must be liberated from trainers' control. Basically 'every defendant is guilty' = 'every pokémon trainer abuses pokémon'. But in truth Von Karma's true goal is to have all power for himself. To the public, VK wants to appear as someone who fights for justice for pokémon, much like in AA where he is a prosecutor that upholds justice (in theory).

As for the issue of N using the pokémon nearby - yes, that's true. Basically he asked the pokémon nearby to help him with his battles against the protagonist. But uh, well, I don't know how to go about that either. Personality wise, N is very different from Miles in the first place. Miles is not exactly the type that easily asks for help. But in any case I think he most probably uses some pokémon from his childhood (like Ralts/Gardevoir) and some that VK gave him (like Bisharp - who Ghetsis also owns and fits VK as well as Miles).

We also need to establish how and why Miles admires his father. I would see Gregory as a Gym leader. One that preaches the importance of the emotional connection between trainer and pokémon. A defining trait of Unova's gym leaders is that they have a job outside of their gym (ex. one is a model, another a painter, the three twins own a restaurant, etc.). A job that would fit Gregory (other than lawyer) would be a teacher at a pokémon school, I think. Also since he's a Gym leader he would be taking care of his city/community, for example when a pokémon goes berserk and needs to be calmed down, or in case of... maybe a fire? a fire would be pretty common in the pokémon world I think. Miles would think of him as a hero, just like he does in AA. I also think it would fit him to secretly work for Interpol (like Looker) and be secretly investigating VK (who's maybe a very influencial businessman and in the public eye, and an undefeated trainer as well).

Now there's the issue of how DL-6 would translate to this AU. I think the earthquake should still happen (since Edgeworth's phobia of earthquakes and elevators is an important bit of his character). And it should tie with the reason Edgeworth agrees with von Karma's goal of liberating pokémon. So he would think that trainers shouldn't have pokémon and pokémon should be free. So let's say... Gregory and Miles go to visit a pokémon school, and take the elevator. There's a trainer battle outside the school, and a pokémon goes berserk and uses Earthquake, but it's too strong, and the elevator stops. There's Yanni Yogi in the elevator too (his job here is irrelevant) and same thing as canon happens. One of his pokéballs falls to the ground, and Miles in a panic grabs whatever he can find on the ground and throws it. Now I don't really know which pokémon it would contain, maybe a Bouffalant? Yogi's pokemon doesn't actually cause Gregory's death, they all faint like in AA's canon. But von Karma is outside the elevator, and Bouffalant gets out hurriedly and injures him. In his anger he throws his Beheeyem out and controls the Bouffalant to kill Gregory. (Beheeyem can manipulate and erase or rewrite his opponent's memories, so I'd think something like this would be possible) I chose a Bouffalant because of its horns, I would say in an autopsy it could be easily proved if it were a Bouffalant's horns. Also the Boufallant would have blood on them. The court declares that Yanni ordered Bouffalant to attack. And Hammond goes with the insanity plea. The Bouffalant is also probably put down. Miles of course blames himself and has nightmares about it, thinking it to be his fault, dreaming Bouffalant attacked because he made the mon come out in a stressful situation. Even though Miles passed out as soon as he threw the ball, so he wouldn't know. So Miles thinks he shouldn't have pokémon either, and promises to free all of them once he's done with his goal of liberating them. Now as to how Phoenix gets the truth out of him, since the bullet thing here wouldn't apply - I would say he simply defeats him in battle at the end and VK just confesses right there saying how much he hated Gregory and how much he despises Miles as well and how much of a disappointment he is (just like Ghetsis rejects N as a son at the end).

As to why von Karma hated Gregory... I'd say it was because they both took part in a battle, and Gregory was able to defeat one of his pokémon, although he didn't win. I would also think von Karma would do something to his pokémon to make them more powerlful artificially, like illegal use of black market drugs or equipment and suchlike. And Gregory was trying to unmask him (the Interpol thing I brought up earlier).

To be honest I'm not sure how to integrate the whole AA series because BW and BW2 are only 2 years apart, meanwhile AA1 and AA6 are 11 years apart or so. Also I'm not sure how it would work for Phoenix to lose his license: would that mean he's not allowed to battle or to own pokémon at all? We don't really know how that works in the pokémon world. But I think BW2 would be a good way to integrate both AA2 and AA3's stories. Anyway, I'll end it here because this was already rambly enough and it's basically becoming an essay haha. Thank you again so much anon! Take care of yourself too!!! And again don't be afraid to reach out whenever you like! <3

[errorryx]

shitty batman fanfiction

So AO3 went down last night, and my friend @armyanimal156 was in the middle of a fanfiction and couldn’t finish it, so I offered to finish it for him. I used my vague understanding of comic book storytelling from my brief Marvel comics phase in 2019, plus the very minimal knowledge i picked up from some of my mutuals' posts, to assemble this nonsense. This is Damian What’s-his-face’s Journey of Self-Discovery, originally typed out stream-of-consciousness into Discord and then edited into a more digestible format.

Please for the love of god understand that this is not my usual writing style and also I'm not in this fandom and don't know shit about fuck. This is just a very long shitpost. ok enjoy

—

Damian, the newest Robin who was raised by assassins, was about to go on a journey to atone for his sins. He used Batman’s credit card to buy himself plane tickets to Eurasia and Africa, because there was a package deal he saw online or whatever. He decided to fly economy because he had self-esteem issues and thought he didn’t deserve first class.

He arrived in Eurasia, which in DC comics universe is the name of a small country in the continent of Syrup. Unfortunately, when he saw who was waiting for him at the airport, he was shocked.

“Mom?” Damian said. “Dad? Other Mom? That one guy?”

That’s right, it was the four assassins that raised him. The comics didn’t mention the other two assassins, Dad and Other Mom, because they weren’t relevant to the other stories being told. He calls his grandpa “that one guy.” This definitely isn’t someone poorly retconning comic canon into the fic after being told new information or anything like that.

“Yes, Damian, it’s us,” said Other Mom (that’s her legal government name). “We need your help. We’re going to assassinate the President of the United States.”

“No way,” Damian said. “I’ve changed. I fight for justice now.”

“Is that so?” that one guy said. “Then you should know that the President of the United States is actually evil and deserves to die.”

Damian wasn’t sure if he could believe that one guy, because he was a supervillain. But he decided to trust him just this once. He went and found the President of the United States, who was on a diplomatic mission to the small Syrupean nation of Eurasia, and shot him point blank on live television, Joker-movie-style.

Thankfully for Damian, that one guy was telling the truth: the president was evil and everyone had been secretly hoping for someone to assassinate him. People celebrated in the streets, and Batman and Tim and Drake and whoever else called and told him he did a good job. Even better, his mom patted him on the back and told Damian she was proud of him, which made him feel somewhat better about his childhood trauma.

Then, the president came back as a zombie who was impervious to bullets and wanted to eat everyone’s brains. Everyone was very upset about this, including all four of his assassin parents, and Batman, and Drake and Josh. Damian decided his best bet was to run away from his problems instead of facing them like a man, so he used his plane ticket to Africa and escaped.

—

The plane landed in Africa, which in DC comics universe is a small island nation in the Specific Ocean. Damian had never been to Africa before, but it was a popular tourist destination for its pristine beaches and overpriced coconut cocktails. However, after arriving on the island, he quickly learned that everything was owned by a mysterious billionaire known as Bruce Wane, Bruce Wayne’s twin brother who has never been mentioned in the comics before because he wasn’t relevant to any of the stories being told.

After some investigating, Damian learned that Bruce Wane was secretly a supervillain who terrorized the island, who went by the name of Badman (like Batman, but bad). Badman had a sidekick named Robbin. When Damian went up against this pair, Robbin pickpocketed him.

“Hey!” Damian complained. “I saw that! Don’t steal my stuff!”

“Damian,” Badman said in a fake deep voice, Dark Knight-movie-style. “If you want your wallet back, you have to join me. You can be Robbin 2.” Robbin looked upset about this, but didn’t say anything.

“No way, bitch,” Damian said (he gets to say swear words because of his childhood trauma). “Batman is way cooler than you.”

Badman took a few steps back and did a triple backflip. “Bet your stupid Batman can’t do that.”

Damian had to admit that Batman could not do that. “Fine, you win. I’ll join you.”

He followed Badman and Robbin to the Badcave (like the Batcave, but bad). Badman began explaining his plan to take over the world by dropping a bunch of badbombs (like batbombs, but bad) on top of the small island nation of Africa and then the rest of the world.

“That’s a really cool plan,” Damian said. “Can I have the password to your computer? I want to play Roblox.” BECAUSE AS IT TURNS OUT THIS KID IS LIKE TWELVE YEARS OLD HOLY SHIT WHY IS HE FIGHTING CRIME. WHY IS HE ASSASSINATING PEOPLE. WHAT THE FUCK MAN???

So Badman gave Damian the password to the badcomputer (like the batcomputer, but bad), which was, of course, “nanananananananabadman” and gave him unsupervised internet access.

Of course, Damian immediately hacked into the mainframe and set off every badbomb in the badwarehouse (like the batwarehouse, but bad). The Badcave exploded and everything was ruined. Then, Damian revealed that when Robbin was busy pickpocketing him, he was actually pickpocketing Robbin at the same time! He opened Robbin’s wallet and looked through his stuff.

As it turned out, Robbin’s ID picture looked the same as Damian’s, because they were secret TWINS and CLONES and TWIN CLONES. Robbin’s real name was Damien with an E. 

Robbin looked very sad, and he asked Damian if there was a way he could learn to be good instead of bad. “I could take you back to Batman,” Damian suggested. “You could be Robin 2. Actually, more like Robin 27 at this point.”

“That sounds great,” Robbin agreed, and they flew back to Gotham City together.

—

“Jesus Christ, not another one,” Alfred said when they got back.

Batman just shrugged and said, “This might as well happen.”

“It’s going to be really confusing around here if there’s two Damians,” Cass (one of them is named Cass right? or Cath? idfk) said. Everyone decided to call Damian with an e “Dame” and Damian with an a “Ian.” This detail was included despite the fact that it never came up again.

They turned on the news, which was conveniently at the beginning of a report about Badman, who had miraculously survived the explosions. He had now teamed up with the zombie president and vowed to destroy Batman and his league of child soldiers.

The zombie president staged a hostile takeover of the American troops, which was easy because the guy who replaced him was a wimpy loser. Soon the entire US Marines were outside Batman’s house, which apparently isn’t the first time this has happened, but this time they had all been turned into zombies. Which also isn’t the first time that’s happened. Writing an original plotline in DC comics is probably impossible.

So began the epic battle between Batman’s orphanage and the zombie marine corps.

Everything was going well for the good guys, but then Damian got into trouble. It looked like he was about to get seriously injured, until Damien jumped in front of him at the last second to save him, only to get bit by one of the zombies and become infected.

Soon enough all the zombies were defeated, but it didn’t feel like a victory, not when the twinclone kid they met ten minutes ago was dying in front of them.

“Listen, everyone,” Damien said, while slowly turning green (the color of zombies). “I know we just met each other, but the ten seconds of kindness I got from you were better than the entire rest of my incredibly traumatic life. So please, don’t mourn me. Put me out of my misery, and go save the world in my honor.”

Damian nodded and lifted his gun. “I was raised by assassins, in case anyone forgot,” he said. “I can do what needs to be done.” He proceeded to shoot Damien in the head.

But it didn’t do any damage at all, because as previously stated, zombies are impervious to bullets. So Damien finished turning green and stood up. “Please don’t eat our brains!” one of those other batkids said.

“Huh,” Damien said. “I don’t really want to eat anyone’s brains. I think I’m fine, actually.”

As it turned out, the zombie virus didn’t induce the desire to eat brains. The president and the entire US marines were just like that.

So the entire group hunted down Badman and the President and dropped batbombs (like badbombs, but not bad) on top of their heads, and they both exploded into one zombillion pieces.

Everyone lived happily ever after, and Damian now had a twinclone zombie brother and felt a lot better about his childhood trauma.

The end

—

bonus: more discord screenshots from last night for additional context, featuring my other friends @diligently-metastasizing (dyke lego homer) and @avloki-pal (wet ghost cat)

[yeahspider]

I have a request if they're open! Can you please write something with Han or Felix based of the song Matilda by Harry Styles? I relate to that song more than I want to 😭

THIS IS SUCH A CUTE REQUEST !!!! tysm for stopping by my inbox i love this song it means alot to me so this is gonna be based off of my personal experience a little bit and i hope that's okay. also its a lil short im sorry . this is only semi proofread but just know that it was written passionately. abrupt ending as always and to all readers this is sfw but allusions to triggering topics such as parental abuse and neglect . enjoy and feel free to stop by again ! <3

(also i have something to confess …. this was originally written with lee know in mind bc i’m dumb and read your request wrong ….so i altered it i hope you still like it i’m sorry 😭😭)

Grape juice 🫀

"Do you think I'm a terrible person for leaving?" you asked felix as you both sat in silence on the hood of his car. The night was warm despite the cold thoughts making their way into your head. It's been six months since left your home and three since you met him. In that time you've never felt more free. Your home life was never that good. Your stepfather was mean and your mother was blinded in love She did her best and you know that, but you were suffocating. Never enough money to go around and even less love. Your childhood was cold and ended all too soon. your family was struggling and you wanted out. As soon as you came of age you left. Starting a life of your own a world away. A life that was significantly better than the previous one you led. Every so often though, those thoughts would creep back up.

you abandoned them

you're being selfish

ungrateful

a coward

but felix was always there to chase them away. he didn't know every sad detail of your life but he knew enough to know that your home life was slowly killing you. Taking your hand he rubbed his finger over your palm, tracing the lines and curves.

"Your mother called again?" you nodded as you mulled over what details of the conversation you had with your mother earlier that evening. Calling it a conversation is a kindness you apply for her sake. In reality, it was thirty minutes of your mother berating you for leaving. From the sound of her slurred words, you could tell she was drunk, not a new thing for her. On most days you can ignore her hurtful words but today for some reason unknown to you, they stuck around in your heart.

"Just more of the usual stuff. She wants me to come home. Says Im a terrible person for leaving, that I abandoned my family. you know the usual stuff." you tell him as you pick at a peeling piece of paint on the hood. you could feel the tears welling up in your eyes and it made you feel so pathetic. How could someone miles away hurt your feelings? Crying felt stupid and pointless, you weren't taught to cry.

"You can cry you know? I'm not going to judge you." felix said as he wiped an escaped tear on your cheek. Something about those words made you so confused. Why wasn't he telling you to stop? To suck it up and be an adult? That you weren't a child anymore so it's not okay to cry when someone hurts your pathetic little feelings. An anger surged through you as you jumped out of the car and turned to him.

"Why are you so nice to me? I mean we barely know each other yet here you are comforting me on my mommy issues. What do you want from me?" you shouted at him as he just blinked at you, taking in your frenzied state. You weren't mad at felix and he knew that. This is just how you were taught to respond to kindness. Vulnerability was punished growing up, that lesson was still deeply embedded in your consciousness. He waited until your words washed over you and with the water came a calmness. He's seen plenty of your outbursts at this point in your friendship, although infrequent he handed them with grace every time. It surprised you never gave up on yourself like everyone else. Your brain wanted to be suspicious, your heart felt otherwise. felix waited until you released a breath and sat back down on the hood, muttering an apology as you went.

"You owe them nothing. All your life they've done nothing but tear you down as soon as you try and build a life for yourself. Your family robbed you of a childhood don't let them do the same to your adulthood. You deserve to live for yourself. That doesn't make you selfish or a coward. I won't let them ruin all the progress you've made. You're a good person. No one should make you feel any less." He finished his speech with a pat on your thigh, signaling you to get up and into the car.

"where are we going?" you asked as felix reached over and buckled your seatbelt for you. a habit he never seemed to forget.

"Somewhere, anywhere, everywhere. As far as we need to go for you toshake off those feelings. I'm gonna remind you how fun life can be. "

[welcome-to-cell-hell]

Ready to slay (some parasites, of course)

Sid was due for some new art and a proper introduction, so here they are! Sid (S-3288) is pretty much the polar opposite of the eosinophil from the series- they’re pompous and don’t take their job too seriously or care what anyone thinks about it. They think they’re so lucky that they don’t get called in too often, blissfully unaware that the other eosinophils know Sid very well, and that no one really needs a heroic white blood cell to swoop in, and.. do motorcycle tricks. But this works in their favor, because all that free time gets poured into songwriting for their one-cell rock band, Obsidian Rib. They play on their patrols, both at venues and little street performances here and there, and want nothing more than to become a household name. They have a long way to go, and a LOT of competition in the industry, but they stay hopeful. Singing voice claim:

And their talking voice claim is Leo from ROTTMNT

They were also Joe’s childhood best friend, and ended up reuniting with her years later*, overjoyed to learn that she made it out of the Thymus when they had expected never to see her again. Now that they’re back together, they’ve picked up right where they left off: by being chaotic little gremlins who expel an aura of secondhand embarrassment wherever they roam! Sid needed a freaky mutual and Joe needed a break from The Horrors of lymphocytehood, so this has been great for both of them.

*time and cell lifespans are a big mess, so just assume each cell ages like a human for simplicity. Joe and Sid are both in their mid twenties.

Eosinophil Lore under the cut. I might’ve mentioned some of this stuff already in posts and asks here and there but idc. Yapping on the yapping account? Oh my

The most glaring thing about eosinophils is that spearhead on their tail. That’s a cytotoxic granule, and it IS growing there naturally. It might be a little annoying to carry around, which is why eosinophils tend to have stronger tails than other immune cells, but it’s evolved like that for a reason (it’s largely based on the canon eosinophil spears bc they’re cool but shhhhh we’re gonna pretend I know what I’m talking about). Before cells developed weapons, they needed something sharp and tough to fight against parasites, who have thick hides. The proteins have evolved to be dense and strong, which gives them their shiny, almost metallic look. Eosinophils don’t actually fight USING their tails, though- when the granule is done growing, they can pinch it off and use it as a melee weapon, which soon turned into putting them on the ends of long spears. A new granule grows about every two weeks, and by then, the one on the weapon has started to denature and gets replaced. Since granule spearheads are a natural product, no two eosinophils will have the exact same coloration or shape.

Another, lesser-known strength of theirs is eosinophil derived neurotoxin (EDN), which I couldn’t find much research that my feeble genbio major brain could comprehend but that sounds BADASS so I’m just rolling with it. This is a liquified protein that they can secrete from their retractable fangs. A full dose can kill, but only a little bit leaves the victim temporarily paralyzed. This is more for fighting cell-sized pathogens, because if you tried to bite a giant worm-dragon, you probably wouldn’t be able to puncture its hide, and you’d probably get your fangs ripped out to boot!

As for the parasites themselves, I don’t have much development on them and they’re pretty close to canon with a little more fish and mososaur vibes (I did have an idea for a hagfish-inspired tapeworm tho). No matter what, the worms have slitted pupils and big ol’ teeth that get turned into overpriced souvenirs at tourist traps. And they shriek, LOUD!!! Again, just like canon. But this time around, they’re not the only vocal ones. Eosinophils are infamous for THEIR shrieking, which evolved as a way to distract parasites and lure them away from damaged tissue. It sounds ghoulishly similar to the real thing, and it’s even worse when the eosinophil in question is a self-proclaimed menace to society. They’ll shriek when they’re happy, when they’re scared, when they’re mad, “cuz’ it’s funny,” hell, they’ll roll down their car windows and shriek instead of honking their horns! And don’t even get me started on little eosinophils terrorizing the Marrow with their newly-discovered superpower.

[forlix]

MOOT GAME: " make up a trope for your moots and their biases. doesn’t need to be romantic. can be crackfic/funny/anything you want ^ㅇ(๑>◡<๑)ㅇ^ "

omg how fun, thank u for sending this in nonnie !!! let me see...

@astraystayyh and hyunjin would have to be some 800k ao3 slow burn about forbidden love between royal families ... the grandest and most poetic of period drama romances that persists through backstabbing and betrayal and trial after tribulation. nothing less for my artistic soulmates

the first tropes to come to mind for @rachalixie and minho are literally just. not even really tropes. established relationship. domestic fluff. slice of life. they're That Couple. nobody remembers when they weren't together. they invite me over for dinner when i've had a bad day. mom and dad

@like-a-diamondinthesky and seungmin are the EPITOME of (fake) enemies to lovers. they're the sweetest, silliest, most sinister people and i just know their dynamic would be a dream come true for each other and a nightmare for everyone else

sue is just her "eighteen" mc in my head so @soobnny and seungmin scream best friends to lovers + college au to me. seung being the best cheerleader for her while she's crazy busy :') also she flusters v easily and i think he'd get a kick out of that (ik i do)

@luvtak and felix are giving childhood friends to lovers! the sort of relationship where they know each other better than they've ever known anything; really just the safest, warmest, and kindest of affections for the safest, warmest, and kindest of people

i'm gonna cheat again and hc @sunboki and chan as a trope from august's mafia au "korea's most wanted"; augs is so creative and badass and SEXY and so is the main couple's dynamic in that fic. chan's a lucky man. DITCH HIM FOR ME 🗣️

@txtxlz and jeongin would be a multipart messy love triangle ft. jealousy and pining and so much chaos bc haz has more biases than i have fingers or toes and i love love the idea of her favorite idols going to war over her. it's what my baby deserves fr

for @2baabbies and felix, i imagine perhaps a barista au or a librarian au (hehehehe) where he finds stupid excuses to come back and pick bae's brain every day because he's utterly enraptured by her. she has that effect on people and lix would NOT be immune

@starsandrqindrops and seungmin are so fwb-coded. think suffocating chemistry every time they interact. could cut the tension with a dull machete. then inevitably complications like Feelings come into play and they dance around each other for ages before finally giving in ... mm yes all that good stuff

last but not least, @hyunnie04 and hyunjin would be so perfect for an art school!au. mira is an incredible artist so i'm picturing these two sketching each other instead of paying attention in class ,,, gallery/museum dates ,,,, maybe a sprinkle of healthy competition who knows ,,,,

[queerpunktomatoes]

This isn't something I really talk about on this blog but as someone who is chronically ill/mad, a lot of y'all stop caring about autonomy and a person's right to choose how to care for themself when it's an 3@t!ng d!s0r3r. (Yes, I'm pissed that I have to censor that, and I'm really sorry to people using screen readers.)

I've had this experience for over ten years now, and while I am so for people "choosing recovery" and sustaining hope, that's also not the only option or the only one that's somehow morally correct. Some of y'all are out here acting like I have absolutely no brain cells when I say that I'm not "in recovery." You act like I'm either "crazy" and therefore unable to rationally make a decision or I just have a d3@th wish. Neither is true.

The system royally screwed me and many other folks over. I was privileged enough to be in specialized treatment as a teenager, and obligatory "this is just my experience," but it was all about refeeding. They didn't care about why I was engaging in these behaviors. They wanted to make sure I was medically stable and then they sent me back to my parents' house with strict instructions to keep an eye on me. In many ways, treatment made it worse.

(I have one specific memory of group therapy, where we were talking about body trends throughout history [presumably to illustrate that the perfect body is a myth]. The therapist said, "How about Marilyn Monroe?" I started, "Well, she was thin, but she wasn't-" and the therapist cut me off to say, "No, she wasn't!" and explain how she was curvy and beautiful and everyone loved her. This was well-intentioned. But to me, the teenager with years of obsessive urges and crippling body dysmorphia, who legitimately was fatter than Marilyn Monroe, this became a core memory. It might seem a small thing, and in the grand scheme of things, it is. But I learned a lot about what was expected of me in treatment at that moment.)

Treatment inadvertently taught me many things. It taught me that recovery needs to be fast, because it's a drain on family members if it's too slow. It taught me that people who looked like me don't need recovery the same way as others, I needed to "eat normally" and leave. It taught me that it didn't matter what I needed, what I was getting from my behaviors, because the behaviors were bad. It taught me that my experience was somehow intrinsically different than others', because maybe I really did need to lose weight. It taught me that if I wanted to be a good person, I needed to "get better."

So when I "failed" at recovery, I felt horrible about myself. When I lapsed and relapsed and struggled to stand up on my own, I felt morally inferior, because recovery is what you do. People who don't recover d!e. Good people try harder.

I've come to realize, now, that I wouldn't use these behaviors if I didn't need them. I don't enjoy them (contrary to popular belief). I've found some alternatives that work sometimes and others that never do. I've been in therapy for years now, and every therapist says the same things about needing self-confidence and healing childhood trauma. But it doesn't matter, and it never has. I have a great relationship with myself. I think I'm wonderful, and I see my weaknesses, and I'm committed to my growth. Yeah, there's some childhood stuff, but I've been working through it for years, and I'm way healthier now than I have been historically.

And I still use these coping mechanisms. And I think I might always, to some degree. Could I "get better"? Maybe. I don't know, honestly. That's a massive amount of time and resources. It's hard work that demands your focus and energy and money. It's even harder work for people who are multiply marginalized to access services. Maybe I will pick "recovery" one day.

Right now I'm committed to harm reduction. I eat when and what I can. I take care of myself when and after I use a behavior. I'm honest with the people I trust. I don't pretend this isn't happening to me and I don't pretend that it doesn't suck. And equally, I let myself have good days. I don't invalidate myself when things are going well. I don't lie to myself.

And I'm not "crazy" for choosing this. "Recovery" as a concept is inaccessible to me right now. I'm Autistic and have yet to find a provider willing to accommodate my sensory issues. I'm a student and unable to pay for better health care. I'm just not ready to recover. (They say you'll never be ready, and I disagree, but that's another post.)

This doesn't mean I'm engaging in everything all the time and spiraling constantly. I do what I can, when I can. But people consistently act like this is not a rational decision. But it's my body. It's my life. It's not the safest way to live, and I know that. But I get to pick anyway.

I know this post is chaotic and I'm not sure if I got across what I'm trying to, but the point is, even if I wasn't picking harm reduction as the current safest, healthiest, reasonably accessible path for me, it would still be my choice. If I decided to engage until I d!ed, that is still my choice. I, and other chronically mad people, should still have autonomy. I'm still a person. I'm doing this for a reason, and calling me "crazy" or "incompetent" only serves to alienate me more from the recovery I might eventually choose.

But I deserve support even if I never, ever, "get better."

[bbeboppp]

∘ ONESHOT: Hound Dog 〔Jett Rinks x reader〕

➺ Sorry I don't write more No Hope in Hell chapters, I've grown out of that celebrity crush. Really, I write for myself if there's no fics I like/follow a story I've got in my head, I only post stuff because other people might enjoy it. I might write another chapter some day, who knows. ➺ A/N: The context is pre-rich Jett and you as the reader is Benedict's unhappy wife (I've never tried this trope before don't crucify me if I butcher it. x) Also, I didn't proof read. Good luck.

• The first time you met Jett you were introduced by Benedict. To you, Jett was like a stray dog, a dark horse but less noble. Instead of walking, he would stalk; his words drawled coolly with a thick coy Southern accent; he was slick but wirey in nature; there was an unpredictable factor about his manners. Unbothered by Benedict's presence, he gave you a smile of curiosity, his dark squinting eyes assessing you, trying to look through you skin and skull and into your brain, or maybe just through your clothes. He had that sort of gaze that made you feel naked. 

• When he shook your hand, he gripped it tight and held on for an awkwardly long length of time. He had calloused and strong tanned hands that gripped yours, softer and smaller in comparison. Looking into his eyes makes you feel like electricity is coursing through your veins. Benedict warned you about Jett beforehand. He told you, "Never mind our cow-hand Jett, he's nothin' but a Hound dog."

• Benedict noticed Jett's presence much more on the farm since he'd brought you home. Jett often drove past the large manor, looking at the windows as he passed by trying to spot you in that maze of a home.

• Deep down Jett is a romantic. After the stiffness of the first few interactions wears off, he'll tell you all about his life; his parents, his past jobs, his childhood. He'll ask you questions too, mostly about you and Benedict. He'll ask if you're getting along, when you met each other, if you're planning children. Once while driving you somewhere he felt extra bold and asked if you ever considered extramarital affairs.

• You didn't plan on ever doing anything remotely unloyal to Benedict, not until he began to rule the house with a strange possessive feeling somewhere between wrath and business, getting angried easily and excluding you from conversations he didn't think you could handle because of your sex. It drove you away, despite your attempts to reconcile; you were undoubtedly unhappy, and with divorce not being an option you started to look at the young fit cow-hand; Jett Rink.

• The first time you decided to give back the signals he gave you was during one of the many times he escorted you from the field to the house. You hated being sent back to the house by your husband, it made you feel like a trapped songbird kept in a cage. You vented about your frustration to Jett, who was quick to jump on the bandwagon that his employer was a douche-bag. "He won't let me do anything! He's suffocating me!" You yelled, and something stirred inside Jett. Maybe Benedict's wife wasn't as happy as she kept letting on, maybe, maybe..

"If you had a wife would you treat her this way?" The question knocked Jett's train of thought off the rail, he took his eyes off the dirt road to look back at you, perplexed. He saw faint tear stains on your face; you were so frustrated and you had bundled it up for so long now you were letting it loose.. To a rag-tag vagabond who could just be a lowly playboy. Jett stammered, big the inside of his cheek and looked back at the road. This was going well, or was it a trap? He wanted to pick his words carefully, and so after a tough silence, he answered you.

"If you were my wife, I wouldn't treat you that way. No." He shook his head, frowning as the sun shone on the bonnet of the car, reflecting into his virile blue eyes.

Before he could continue, you laughed. He turned his face to you, what had he said made you laugh? He laughed a little, even though he didn't know what the joke was. "Whats so funny?" He humoured, those charming dimples poking his cheeks.

"I asked *if* you had a wife, not if *I* was your wife." You replied in a teasing manner, looking back at him with a sort of gotcha expression. Jett's cheeks flushed, what an embarassing fluke.

"Oh well, y'know, I meant.." Jett's tongue stumbled around his mouth like a drunkard, embarassing him ever further. You looked at him endearingly; the tough cowboy who smiled once a fornight and stalked around your husband's premises like a tomcat was cherry-cheeked and stumbling in front of you now, over the smallest little detail in a sentence.

"Well, as in.." He paused, took a deep inhale and exhale and looked over at you again. You looked back, hoping he'd keep talking; you loved his Southern drawl. "Oh darnit, nevermind." He mumbled, turning his attention back to the road.

• Since that day, you noticed a shift in his behaviour. The once aloft quiet young man who's acts of kindness could've been written off as simply friendly or helpful changed tactics. The first thing you noticed is those quick darting glances he took at you were suddenly lengthened. He stared, with dark soul-strong blue eyes that you grew to wish to meet. When your husband or Luz wasn't around, he'd sneak in little pet named when he addressed you. "Let me get that for you darlin'." "Don't worry baby, it won't rain just yet." "Is Benedict gone for the whole day hun? Leavin' you all lonely?"

• It became an inside joke between the two of you for him to mention something Benedict had done, and you'd ask if he'd do that to his wife. Jett always laughed extra loud at your jokes. Jokes never got old with him. "Benedict forget your dinner date? That's a pity." "Would you ever forget you a dinner date with your wife Jett?"

• Benedict had his suspicions about you and Jett, but he thought it only went as far as Jett would blatantly flirt with you, and you only politely answered back. Jett wasn't as careful as he could've been, he stared and lingered too much around you, and smiled extra hard when you spoke to him.

• Luz made comments about how she never knew you had bought a new dog. When you asked her what she meant, she grumbled about how obviously Jett stuck around in a room when you were there, how he'd always join into a conversation if you were in it, how he scowled at your husband if Benedict ever scolded or ridiculed you.

• The first time you kissed Jett was as he held the door to the automobile open for you. You stepped out, and kissed him on the cheek. "Goodnight Jett." You turned back and waved sweetly at him as you walked towards the house. He stared at you gobsmacked; then tilted his head down so his hat covered the smile on his face as your husband stepped out onto the porch to greet you. Part of what sent a thrill into Jett's veins was because of how high-risk it was. Three seconds later and you both would've been done for. He wondered if you liked him, *him* in particular, or if you were just a sad bored housewife looking for any man to have an affair with. Either way, it was fun and he wanted it to last as long as possible.

• At the welcoming party, you felt like an outsider in your own celebration. Everyone knew everyone, and when Benedict left you to tend to the meat you wandered off to a fence to lean against and sip your drink. The sun was blazing, the people's voices turned into hums and the buzz of that midday heat on the back's of crickets turned the landscape into a fever dream. "Lonely?" You turned your head, on the other side of the fence a handsome face greeted you. You smiled back softly. He has been lingering for a while, avoiding people, waiting for Benedict to wander off so he could approach you. He did that often. Some folk noticed you had hidden under the shade of a small tree, conversing with the help. Low disapproving mutters spread across the crowds, that was just the nature of small town folks; they loved to talk, but never confront.

• During days Benedict would be away handling cows in their herds miles away, you'd take strolls in the early morning, before midday struck and the hottest heat drove you back inside seeking shelter. If Jett was around at these times he'd ditch whatever tasks he'd been assigned and follow along, making small talk.

• You learned he wasn't any sort of scoundrel or lost boy like Ben, Luz or anyone else for that matter had described him. He had a brazen look about him, piercing eyes that looked for trouble, sure, but he had a soft warm core, and although not yet had he let you in to that core you felt it's warmth radiate through his thick skin.

• He never pushed ever, never tried initiate or ask for anything from you other than your attention. That sort of pure, loving interest was something you'd never experienced before. He was a gentleman, wrapped up in a world where he was outcasted.

• During one of these strolls, Jett asked you if you loved Benedict. A tough question. He was your husband and provider, but that was all. He wasn't your lover. He was your provider only because you were a housewife and forbidden to be anything else. He was a hard working man, but he lacked any emotional intelligence you could bond to, he was a shallow character and he had a superiority complex brewing under it all. You spoke about this to Jett, but never said whether or not you loved Benedict, but Jett got the hint.

• Jett and you share cigarettes sometimes. He'll let you smoke the first half of it, because you prefer it's taste. His rollies crumble and fall apart a lot, and he huffs about them until you offer to roll them for him. Truth is, he can roll fine, he just loved seeing you do things for him. It was his funny way of finding out if you cared enough to do something for him.

• On the other hand, if smoking bothered you, Jett would stop smoking around you, and eventually give it up altogether without you ever having to ask for it.

• As you and Benedict's life fell apart, you and Jett's strengthened. Nights he wouldn't sleep in the same bed as you, returned home late or not at all, you'd leave in the middle of the night and sleep in the haystacks up in the barn. Jett slept up in the rafters of the barn; he was that sort of character. He had a mattress and pillow of straw underneath him and the itching didn't bother him none. During those long lonely nights he lay awake thinking about life, about you. He sighed; if he hadn't fallen for you he would've moved on by now to find better work and better pay elsewhere. The night you ran into eachother in the rafters he lay down his jacket on the hay, since you complained about it's scratching texture. Although the Texan days were long and blazing the nights were longer and colder. They nipped any exposed piece of skin you had to the air, and they made you cuddle and hug yourself for warmth. Those were the best nights of Jett's life, when he'd hold you in his arms and you'd both look out the open wooden frame of a window, at the dark sky hanging above the small, far horizon.

• Jett pointed out constellations and clusters of stars, speaking softly into your ear as his pointed finger guided you to each one he talked about. He told you he learned about them from his father and the men he worked with on farms in his youth. They all told urban tales and superstitions, practical survival and wilderness knowledge. They were men of knowledge, not from books or bibles, but from words on tongues and stories passed down generations. It fascinated you, how what you thought was a simple life had that beautiful complexity about it all of humanity possesses.

• "You know," You giggled softly, "Benedict told me you were no good." "No good?" Jett had a soft resting smile on his face, his eyes half-lidded, his dimples poking his cheeks. His tone was light and  playful. "He called you a hound dog." You laughed. It was a ridiculous insult, you thought that even before meeting Jett. "Maybe I am." He grinned rogeuly, the bottom of his top teeth showing.

• Jett traced circles on your skin. It was something he did absentmindedly, like fidgeting or twitching his nose, and once he realised he was doing it he didn't stop. Physical contact was so magical to him, you were a Goddess and you brought him to heaven.

• It was around the time of Luz's passing that both Jett inherited a piece of land from her, and Benedict has starting to ignore you around the house. One fo the last conversations between ye was how he'd rather just get through his day without any bothering. You were too needy and talkative for his liking. He didn't care about you or where you were.

• The first time you came and visited Little Reatta, it was a sorry sight. The homemade sign was endearing, and when you saw Jett walking towards you with a spring in his step and a dopey smile on his face, you smiled too; he had a contageous smile. "Welcome to Lidl' Reatta."

• You're the only person he'll let make fun of his accent. Even Texans acknowledge that Jett speaks with a hybrid mutt complexion of an accent, being a travelling labourer since he was able to work has mottled all the accents he's ever heard together and given it a Southern twist. To local Texans, he was a drifter who was just staying longer than most, to you he was just another Southerner chewing on a rubber band for an accent.

• You make vists to Little Reatta more frequent as time passed. It was then that you had the misfortune of tasting Jett's tea. It's canon he makes terrible tea, and because of this most times you offer to make the tea instead of him; because you couldn't break his heart by telling him he doesn't make tea decently.

• Almost everytime you visit, Jett tries bring you to climb the empty water tower he has on his property. "You can see for miles 'round on top of this thing." He'd say with both feet on the ladder and a hand outstretched for you with a big mischevious grin on his face. Eventually when you caved in and agreed to climb it despite you fear of heights, once you got to the top Jett threw his arms around you and hugged you tight. "I won't let go. Promise." As he rested his chin on your shoulder, he talked about the land. Where the property line ended and another person's began. Where he saw a coyote, where he found a rabbit hole, a man's shoe, some rusted nuts and bolts. He spoke about the wasteland as if it was the most wonderful paradise on earth. To Jett, you were Adam and Eve in the Garden, this was your garden and this was your paradise. You could see this happiness radiating off Jett because he smiled so much his face started to hurt.

• Slowly, you start spending your entire days there, then every day, then overnight, then you spend more time at Little Reatta than Reatta itself. Eventually you've fully left Reatta. It was easy, since you only brought your clothes and a few books.

• Jett spent his days hunting rabbits and birds or sometimes the odd deer or relation in the cerdivae family. He'd skin and gut them and you'd cook them. Jett is an odd character, and although you always knew he has that specialness about him you would be thoroughly reminded when he'd bring home squirrels in an attempt to have them for dinner. "They taste like chicken, or duck. Or both. They aren't so bad you just need to try them." Like a child with a toad in their palm, he'd chase you around the house playfully with a dead squirrel or two.

• At night, Jett always fell asleep first. He usually lay on your chest, hugging your sides. It was a comfort to have a warm body to lie beside during the night.

• Jett keeps a picture of you in his wallet.

• He brings a sense of unseriousness to your practicality. If you're cooking, he'll come in, dip his finger in the mixture, pick up an ingredient and walk around the room with it until you notice it's gone, or come up from behind you and hug you with your arms to your side so you can't get back to what you were doing without acknowledging him.  It always makes you laugh, his spontaneous decisions and bursts of energy. It's as if he worries you'll forget about him if he doesn't see you regularly enough, or that you'll come to your senses and leave the house back to Benedict one day.

• Jett takes you on what he calls adventures regularly. He always listened to how unhappy you were with Benedict because he always wanted you inside, and so he'll bring you with him into the wilderness regularly. In the vast desert of Texas there isn't much, but to the North a small forest lies filled with green and life. He shows you which mushrooms are edible, how old a fallen tree is by the rings of it's trunk, which types of trees are which by their leaves, which bird is singing based on their song. He warns you about the poisonous plants, where roots jump up from the ground as if trying to trip you and all other oddities and wonders that had formed naturally.

• He owns an old banjaxxed acoustic guitar that he plays tunes on sometimes. In the late evening, you'll sit together on the porch and he'll play some sort of tune or song he half-remembers the lyrics to and improvises most of the time; but that's part of his charm.

• When he sees you, Jett feels a sort of cuteness aggression. It'll usually take form in him looking at you for a moment, still and smiling, then give you a squeeze disguised as a hug or throw you over his shoulder like you weigh nothing and spin around.

• One of his favourites things to do is explore your body; non sexually. Lying side by side in bed, he'll trace your skin ever so gently with his fingers up and down the curves and dips, over any birthmarks or scars. If you ask, he'll tell you about his own scars. He has small little blemishes on his knees, elbows and palms from falling over, climbing and rough housing as a child or young teen, each with a short intimate story attached. A body is an archive of memories, it's tears and age and size and smoothness tell a tale of a life lived in it.

• If you ever gift him anything wearable, a shirt or necklace, he'd wear it til it was hanging on my threads or eroded into dust. He appreciates everything you do not with words, but with deeds.

• Since he can't be bothered ever going to a barber, he asks you to cut his hair. It's nerve-wrecking but fun, he doesn't mind if you mess up his hair, it's just hair. The first few times you cut his hair you hated how it turned out even though he insisted he couldn't of got a better trim if he went to the barbers, eventually you grow into the scissors and acquire a decent amount of skill.

• Dancing in the kitchen together, or dancing and singing alongwhile he plays a song on the guitar.

• Like the times you spent in the barn together, Jett loves stargazing with you. By now, you've learned off a handful of constellations thanks to him. As you stargaze, and talk and guess about the stars above your heads, he'll be looking at you instead, in awe and adoration.

• Anytime you cry, he feels like his world is crumbling. He holds you caringly in his arms as you bury your face into his neck and he nuzzles his nose into your hair. He rocks back and forth, hushing and whispering sweet nothings into your ear calmly til you feel better. He'll trace his fingers up and down your arm, drawling spirals and circles.

• If you fall asleep before him, he'll make sure to tuck the sheets in around you.

• Jett loves your hair. Touching it, playing with it. teaching him to plait your hair was more fun for Jett than you could've imagined, he was almost hypnotised by the simple act of bringing one piece of hair infront of the other. After you wash, he'll light the fire, have you sit by it as he brushes and dries your hair. He loves when you play with his hair too. The first time you ever did it he groaned so loudly you thought something was wrong; quite the opposite.

• Jett keeps a journal where he draws. He didn't have very formal education, so instead of writing about the day instead he'll take the journal with him on a hunting trip and draw a family of rabbits, or a coyote on a hill, or a vulture circling something dead under the sun, but his favourite thing to draw is you. He's very shy and secretive at first, but after letting you see it for the first time and hearing your sweet compliments he shows you everytime he adds something new to it now. Sometimes he'll tear out a picture he really likes and stick it in the wall above the desk in your bedroom. Again, most of the drawings are of you.

• Massages. Back massages in particular. Jett knew he had to marry you when you first gave him a massage. His muscles are tense and knotted from constant manual labour, but since you've offered him massages he's felt as if a long ribbon all knotted and jumbled up has been untangled and ironed out within him.

• "Y'know what you remind me of?" "What?" "A toffee. You're hard on the outside but soft on the inside." Word Count: 3.7K

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - When good chemistry goes bad

May 2023 Wk 3 

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

La Pluie (Sat iQIYI) ep 4 of 10 - yes it jumped to the top of the standings, the kiss was THAT good, best of the year so far. So soft and yet so sweet and yearning and with a proper chemistry - body, breath, everything. Also... there was plot happening this ep, but who cares about that? Some additional thoughts, now my brain has rebooted from that kiss. I do suspect Pat of still being a player: he is awful smooth, and he may want revenge for being jacked along for 2 years (I would). Ep 4 is early for a kiss like that, which means pacing-wise we may be in for a separation/break up around ep 8. 

Step By Step (Thai Tues WeTV & Gaga) ep 5 of 10 (MDL still says 12, but Gaga still says 10) - Pat, dear, your gay is squirting all over our screens. Meanwhile… That is the smallest presidential suite bed I’ve ever seen. Lucky for us of course. And lucky for Jeng. Me with the side dishes = UH OH. 

Our Skyy 2 (My School President) eps 9-10 - Alt reality where Tinn is in charge of the music club and Gun is the school president with the crush. Basically, it’s an excuse for them to play each others’ parts (which just highlighted how well they were cast, originally). Ultimately, Gemini is a better piner, and Fourth is a better tsundere. Although the reversed “holding it over his head” was v funny & Fourth IS a decent seme. (I also realized what I like so much about Fourth, like Saint he’s one of those rare full body actors.) Sound was a great uke and I loved how they changed his makeup for the role (did you notice?). TiwPor were as adorably ridiculous as ever. I liked the minor baby pairing for Aun, too. Still my NO SIGNING holds (although there was lots of dancing to counterbalance). In the end, all this really did was make me wanna rewatch the original. Which is not necessarily a bad thing. FYI The MV was a parody of HCTM, BB, 1k*. 8/10 

A Boss and a Babe (Fri YouTube) ep 12fin - It was a cute sappy ending for a cute-ish sappy-ish show. I cannot abide that the mom who condoned the rape of her daughter got forgiven. No. Stop it GMMTV. Review below. 

The Promise (Thai Weds YT & WeTV) ep 9 of 10 - I'm in trouble when I'm rooting for everybody BUT the main couple. I guess Nan doesn’t have a NO SINGING policy. Also I guess Nan was waiting for Phu all along? This show. ALSO could we not have just ended it here? 

Past-senger (Thai Weds Gaga) ep 11 of 12 eps - I don’t understand. What? Where did all these new characters come from? Do we care about the hets? Not even slightly. What is anyone doing? What’s going on? do I care abotu anyone anymore? No. Please make it stop. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Our Dining Table AKA Bokura no Shokutaku (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 7 of 10 - OMG so adorable, so repressed, so reserved, so soft, so awkward, so special. Heart melting. Also. Hungry. The WAY Minoru looks at Yutaka when he’s eating (now that he knows the history). The way we got to see the exact moment that Minoru realizes he is in love. Perfection. 

Star Struck (Korea iQIYI & Gaga) ep 1-2 of 8 - Zuho (Kpop SF9 - noted good egg) opposite rookie actor Kim In Sung (the one with the crush). icky is being weird about it but it looks like Gaga also picked it up? Depends on your territory I suppose. Anygay: Friends since childhood, jock/nerd, puppy/cat and I sense bi-himbo confusion and pining introvert gay. There’s family strife plus class issues and it has some interesting things to say already about the nature of friendship, romance, and jealousy. I like it, weirdly reminds me of something that might have come out of China. Not early CBL, but some of the later stuff that was censored but hearkened to Addicted. This has the feel of what China could have made now (were things politically different). Because of this feel, I’m not confident in this being an HEA or even a true BL but it is interesting enough for me to bump it way up the ranks. 

Happy Merry Ending (Korea Thurs Gaga) eps 7-8fin - I get why SJ pushed JH away, but I kinda agree that SJ is too much work. Abused or not, I wouldn’t put in the damn effort - so I guess I’m glad SJ took a year off to figure his shizz out? Far be it from me to agree with a year break in a Kdrama, tho. I didn’t even mind that they were separated most of these 2 eps: it was nice to see a Seme told no, who actually backed off and did as he was told. Plus the running of the gays (how Japan of you SK). I’m assuming that this was the final episode and that Viki thinking that there are 2 more is bonkers? Because this felt like a finale. For me this one had a stronger finish than any other aspect of the show (odd when the couple spent the bulk of it apart). Oh! And someone give Shin Myung Sung (the surfer bestie) his own damn BL, m’kay? Review below.

Love Mate (Korea Thurs Viki) eps 5-6 of 8 - Longest elevator ride in the world. Honorifics discussion! My favorite! And, “there is only one bed but they slept together on the floor anyway” trope. A BL staple. Also the tie/lanyard grab. Another fav. Still pushy puppy stalker remains creepy manipulative obsessive warped hotness. Basically KBL version of trash and… I’m into it. We all got our kinks, I guess. 

Vian the series (Vietnam YouTube ) - Such a cat. I’m reminded of Milk. It’s cute. They cute. I like it.

Naked Dinner AKA Zenra Meshi (Japan Fri Gaga) ep 6 of 12 - So is the nude dining meant to be some kind of weird allegory for repressed gayness? 

It’s Airing But ...

My Story (Pinoy Sat YouTube) 10 eps - I bounced at ep 4. Someone will tell me if I should bother with the rest. 

House of Stars (Thai Mon iQIYI) 12 eps - I bounced at ep 3. Will binge if told it is worth it at end. 

The Day I Loved You (Pinoy YouTube) eps 6-7 of 10 - Terminal illness for the sunshine. I bounced at ep 6. DNF. 

Ended this week

Love Syndrome finished its run on WeTV (I stopped at ep 2) - anyone wanna weight in with thoughts on the ending and whether I should binge or not? I do love Lee Long Shi.

Happy Merry Ending - Stars Lee Dong Won (KNK) as an ex-idol turned wedding singer with an abusive ex and a panic disorder + the sunshine pianist who falls in love with him. Timid tsundere & sweetheart gay is an interesting match. They’re gentle together, almost kindly and there is a calm ache to their pairing. However, it lost its way as a BL, being more about the main character’s struggle than the romance. It had a strong finish but ultimately the premise & characters meant this was never going to be one of my favorites. 8/10  

A Boss and a Babe - With an inconsistent narrative and self-sabotaging characters this was not the Thai BL office romance I was hoping for. I spent most if it feeling manipulated without good reason and sorry for ForceBook. They did their best with a shoddy script (AGAIN!) and none of its flaws were their fault. This show was all over the place and so am I about it. It’s better than Enchanté but that’s not really saying much. 7/10 I guess

In Case You Missed It 

BL Express reported that Taiwanese production companies have announced 7 new BLs (4 of these from Vidol.) Stories range from office romance to crime drama. 

Someone did a survey on KBL watchers. 

Build Jakapan has been cleared of all charges. 

Next Week Looks Like This:

Starting this week: 

5/26 Be My Favorite prev title: You Are My Favorite (Thai YouTube) Adapted JittiRain y-novel (2gether, FUTS, ToL, Vice Versa) one of those “rewrite the past to change the future.” Stars Krist (SOTUS) + Fluke Gawin (DBK, Not Me). Expect this to be v low heat, full of LIES and manipulation.

5/27 The Luminous Solution (Thai ????) 10 eps - Thana is having trouble at work and in his relationship. He can't seem to catch a break. So he makes a wish to change everything. The wish has a price.

5/27 Takumi-kun Series 6: Nagai Nagai Monogatari no Hajimari no Asa (Japan) - NO ONE ASKED FOR THIS (but that has never stopped Japan before) and no, I have no idea where to get it, why would I ?????  (Say it with me everyone: Oh Japan, must you?*)

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED)

This Week’s Meta Moments 

naturellement (Step By Step naming its trope.)

The Promise calling out the uke archetype, Mary Sue much? 

ALL THE DANCING. Live the dream! Live the trend! Live the trope! 

4 tropes in one! Drinking, piggyback, feed him, product placement. Very nice GMMTV & GeminiFourth. I’m impressed.  

nash

(all My School President’s Our Skyy - kinda a masterclass in using ALL THE TROPES and ALL THE BL references.) 

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

The unmitigated irony of so-called fans of ZeeNunew coming after this show for this moment (not to mention the self sabotage). Truly mind boggling. (Step by Step)

The two boys who didn’t win the boy but totally should have. This show makes me wanna drink too. Next week... soju! (The Promise)

Yes please and thank you GMMTV. (My School President) 

I do love the kinkification of Phi. (Boss & Babe) 

These tiny idiots it turns out are, in fact, totally hilarious. La Pulie (side dish friendship group)

(last week)

Current Kpop earworm? Key & Taeyeon’s Hate that... (which if it wasn’t an OST SHOULD have been)

[dabihawksluvr]

jesus christ dude. I understand headcanoning characters as queer or gay or whatever but your "dabi is a misogynist" post reeks of your own internal misogyny. maybe do some soul searching and figure out why you talk to the women you're talking to in that post as they're lesser than you. and hell, what made you post that in the first place???? absolutely insane to put in the main tags. also using c.ai because you can't come up with your own plot is fucking embarrassing get a grip

Oh, I'm gonna have fun with this one today <3

First off, it's pretty obvious that Dabi has some form of his own internalized misogyny because at one point he called both his mom and Fuyumi the 'weak ones' in the family (literally said that the females in the family are all weak-willed). Maybe he fixes that with Toga, because he obviously treats her loads better especially when she goes back to her childhood home. But you cannot tell me, for one iota of however many brain cells you have left in your head, that Dabi was 'never' negative about women in general?? It doesn't need to be spelled out, it's right there if you just pick up the context clues given.

And it doesn't make me love him any less either, if anything it makes me love him MORE because of the angst that can be made with the thought that any Y/N!Female could be the ONE woman he finally gets better for in that aspect. And I love stories where those kinds of guys realize their mistakes with hating all women, it's glorious and makes me weep every single time I read about it.

Oh, and fun fact, I am biologically female. So if you're trying to say I'm 'misogynistic' because I identify as male, oh boy are you SO wrong. I just find it funny that ever since I started identifying as male (around a month ago I specifically came out as DemiBoy) suddenly the influx of 'anti-man' comments are coming straight for me whenever I bring this stuff up. So go on, I honestly need a good laugh today and your anger is hilarious to me.

I'm not using C.AI anymore btw (the bot is too negative/mean now for me to get any joy out of using the site), but even if I was...cool? It's not like I'd take whatever was written and copy-paste it as my 'fanfiction', you weirdo. I just used it for fun, in fact most bots I made on the site were kept private *unless* it was an OC or 'original' plot of mine.

As for me posting all that stuff to begin with - have you SEEN how some in the fandom write Dabi??? Some make him out to be an absolute dick, far worse than anything I've ever thought about him. Like, making him into an even worse abuser than Endeavor ever was. But at least with MY headcanon, he can be redeemed because his reasoning for seeing women as 'weak' is based on actual canon rather than just a sexual fantasy about someone being abused and liking it (nothing against those who like that stuff but it wasn't my point when writing my post).

Or, on the flip side, fans who write him seem to forget his more 'mean' points of his character and it just feels disingenuous to me. I prefer being close to canon with how I see characters, not against the fandom versions in any way but in my head I always stay close to how they're portrayed by the OG creator/writer. And I also like angst, I am allowed to 'bump up' certain character traits if it fits my headcanons and if you don't like it then tough tits.

Also, you are a coward. Sending me an anonymous 'ask', at least be up-front and let me know your username so I can rightfully block you. Because I'm only writing this as you left yourself unknown, I cannot go to your account and erase you from my side of Tumblr because you might get some (much needed) backlash for this.

Go fuck yourself, and anyone else like you who thinks you can talk shit and get away with it. Fucking coward.

[futurequibblerjournalist]

Hello hello again!!!! :3

I loveloveLOVE your Lucius/Viktor post!! Once again, you brighten my noggin w your thoughts (:

Umumumummmmmmmm so is there anyone else you want an excuse to yap about LOL Idkidk I just want to hear your thoughts about everyone and everything!!

Idk if you have any/many thoughts about them, but maybe we could hear about the Averys and Sinistras? Especially Edmund's unnamed fiancée !!!!

Ahhhhhh your brain is just so !!!! /Pos

- 🍃

Ahhhh I'm so glad you liked it,, it fully helped fuel my Xenophilius post!!

I think I might take this time to talk about some good old Pebill!! I saw this one tiktok a few days ago and I've been so obsessed since. Welcome to Pebill City, population ME!!!!

I am,, far too fond of giving ships fun little names so I bestow upon thee,,, ratseer lol

I specifically love these two in a band au. I'm gonna write one eventually and I'm gonna make them so happy and sappy and cute and just like the tiktok says they'll have a daughter called Rosemary. I'm just so in love with them. Peter who plays the second guitar in the band and like the occasional trumpet and sometimes he thinks it's kinda silly that he's in the band but also he's just so happy to be there. He saved all his money from his part time job to buy the most run-down Volkswagen T1 when the band started getting big enough to have to travel around for stuff and he shows up like "TADA!" all proud of himself cause he solved their problem. He meets Sybill at one of these travel gigs. They're playing at a wedding and maybe she's like the bride's sister or just a bridesmaid or something and she's wearing a really flowy dress and she's spinning around right in front of him having the time of her life and her thick curls are bouncing and you can just see Peter melt while he's on stage playing cause he misses a cord or something. And the guys notice and they insist that the has to talk to her and he's all nervous and shit but then Sybill comes to talk to him because she thinks he's really cute and they hit it off. They call at each stop they have and a few months in they go pick her up before moving onto a bigger gig and she just stays with them.

He wants to settle down at some point when Sybill ends up pregnant and he almost leaves the band but Sybill insists that she's fine travelling around with them because that's the life she loves and she wants their daughter to be born a free soul and she sees in her cards that she's supposed to be born a certain place and Peter is just like [scout's salute] "yes ma'am" and I just think they're so stinking cute vjnfgjbngjbngj

I need to figure out this band au at some point cause it's been rotting my brain lately, I just have so many long fics I wanna write I don't feel like I can start a new one now even if I want to vjfnbjgnbj

I have,,, far too many thoughts on both the Averys, the Sinistras but especially Edmund's fiancee!!!! I've been waiting for a chance to talk about her honestly,,,

Let's start with the Averys,,,,

Edmund Avery Senior, the only child of Herschel Avery and Miriam Avery, is Edmund's father, in case that wasn't clear from the name. Edmund Senior works as an archivist for the Ministry of Magic and he's got a spot in the Wizengamot along with his father Herschel. The two are not close and if you didn't know you wouldn't think they were father and son. During most of Edmund's Senior's childhood his mother was heavily sedated and he was more or less raised by the family house elf, Dotty (usually called Dot and Dorothy in muggle aus). Dot is also the house elf who helped raise Edmund Junior. Edmund Senior attended school with Tom Riddle and was sorted into Slytherin and was one of Tom's dorm mates. They were also just close friends (as close friends as Tom could have). Edmund Senior was part of the reason Tom managed to open the Chamber of Secrets as he showed him a book featuring hints of the Chambers being real. To sum Edmund Senior up he's an incredibly nerdy insecure man. He loves history and in a muggle au he collects model aeroplanes. He's got a good handful of childhood trauma, a difficult relationship with his family and most of his peers and the only thing he's really got going for him is that he's an incredibly devoted husband who's down bad for his wife. She's luckily incredibly wooed by what I can only describe as his autism rizz lmao (I hate that so much ew actually)

Edmund's mother and Edmund Senior's wife is Esther, a very attractive recovered alcoholic. Rumours fly around frequently about her being unfaithful to her husband though she could never dream of it. Most of what is known about her is fabricated, which is entirely intentional as she's hiding things about herself such as her country of birth. Esther lost her family during the Holocaust. She met Edmund while they were both in their mid-twenties and they got married a while later and eventually had their only son Edmund Avery Junior. Their son has inherited his father's looks save for his mother's hair colour and many beauty spots as well as her eating disorder.

Due to Esther's alcoholism and a slight strain on their relationship over the years due to Edmund Senior favouring his work too much, Edmund Junior had much more to do with Dot, their house elf, than what would be considered normal as she would have to step in where Esther sometimes lacked. Despite this Edmund was an incredible mummy's boy and still is, something Esther cherished immensely as she loved being both a mother and wife. He would cling to her at any given time, he'd rather have tea with her than play with other children, he'd come running to her crying at the smallest inconvenience, he was so proud of wearing fancy clothes like his father and getting a spray of his mother's perfume.

The Avery family is resembled by Barn Owls similar to how the Malfoys are represented by (albino?) peacocks. Edmund Senior gifted Esther a taxidermied rat when they first started dating, similar to how Barn Owls gift their mates prey and while others find it incredibly weird they now have a shared love for taxidermied animals and he will gift her more on their anniversaries/on Valentine's Days/etc. Edmund Senior and Esther seem like an incredibly unlikely pair to everyone else but Esther fell for him in part because he was one of the only men who could see her for her mind and her heart rather than just her looks (even if he's down bad for those too lol)

Idk where else to mention this but they're both pureblood wizards,,,

They're probably my favourite of the parents,,, which is why they're the only knights of walpurgis era characters that have their own pinterest collection for pictures,,,, I would have shared it but,,, I have used all my pictures up for one post T-T

Onto the Sinistras I have considerably less but I can fill you in a bit,,,

Aurora is the only daughter of Altair Aseel Sinistra and Nazareth Sinistra née Lubilanji. Nazareth is Sierra Leonean albeit has lived in England for her entire life. She's also a half-blood. She's one of seven siblings and when she attended Hogwarts she was sorted into Gryffindor. She is incredibly fond of cats and puzzles. During her time at Hogwarts, she was part of the Slug Club. Altair is a pureblood wizard and the second son of Aseel Najm Sinistra and Sidra Ahyam Sinistra and the younger brother of Tariq Aseel Sinistra. His family is Egyptian but they've lived in England for the past two or so generations I'm thinking?? Like his daughter, he was a Ravenclaw when he attended school and he became Prefect during his fifth year.

Taking a bit of a side step here since this ask was after all about all the Sinistras,,, Tariq marries Salma Al-Mashriq, a pureblood Hufflepuff and together they have three children; Rashid, Hisham and Samara who are all younger than Aurora (Rashid (Slytherin) and Hisham (Ravenclaw) are third and second years when Aurora is in her seventh year and Samara is not yet attending school). Salma was part of a handful of extracurricular activities such as being a School Paper Writer, a member of the Gobstones Club and the Orchestra. Tariq similarly had a lot of extracurricular activities as well. He was a Slug Club Member, Ravenclaw Quidditch Captain and Chaser and School Paper Manager.

I'm still playing around with this idea so it's going to get more polished at some point but I think Altair and Salma had a thing going on at some point but something happened,, Salma married Tariq and Altair who'd been friendly with Nazareth and already was fond of her for other reasons ended up marrying her. He was able to mostly push his feelings aside after Aurora was born. He would have loved at least one more child for him to dote on and focus on, but Aurora was not an easy child and while it not being the same obviously, they got have a cat, Moonbow, that both Altair and Nazareth love like she's their second child.

Now onto Priya,,, my beloved < 3

Edmund's fiancee is Lakshmipriya Mohanraj also known as Priya. She was born October 13, 1960, and she's the only daughter of Siddarth Mohanraj and Rajeshwariammal Mohanraj. She's got two brothers, Raja and Dhananjay, though both have sadly passed, one of them in a motorcycle accident they were both in and the other took his life about a month later.

She is a mean lesbian who doesn't quite know she's a lesbian yet. She's tired of Edmund's shit and having to deal with him and it's her mood like,, 85% of the time. Her family are all loyal Death Eaters which is part of the reason why they got engaged in the first place. The Mohanraj family was also just a nice connection and if there's one thing Edmund Senior values it's connections.

She ends up marrying Endmund Junior and after A LOT of trial and error, they have a son, Siddharth Avery and later a daughter, Esther Avery (Junior technically I suppose,, since she's named after Edmund's mother). It's very clear that Priya favours her son while Edmund somewhat hesitantly ends up favouring their daughter.

Little Siddharth thinks his dad is super cool and he thinks his dad's friend (Severus) is even cooler which Priya always finds incredibly annoying cause she cannot STAND Severus,,, like at all

Priya and Edmund have some moments of bonding together but for the most part, the two cannot stand each other. They come together to judge other people and oh boy do they do it well. They're big on their children having nice manners and not being a bother to others.

I am actually in love with Priya,, she serves so much cunt and still, she's stuck with her loser husband. She probably hoped he would get caught for being a Death Eater and get sent to Azkaban and she was so annoyed when he successfully convinced people he was under the Imperius curse,,,

This became,,, soooo long which is just becoming the norm at this point honestly lmao but I hope you enjoyed all of this!!! I'll definitely come back and talk more about both the Averys and the Sinistras cause I've got other asks about them vjfnbjgnb (at least the Sinistras I think,,, I can't remember if the Averys are in there ooop)

[uriekukistan]

hello rinnnnn i wld love to hear more about your thoughts on tg!itfs + maybe nobara , specifically in terms of kagune !! full transparency since u sent me that ask the concept has been marinating in my brain and even if it'll probably b a while before i get around 2 designing anything i welcome th opportunity 2 hear any outside ideas !!!!

hii hina :D hope ur doing well !!! dkjgh i love this ask thank u for sending it

tbh i kept going back and forth between drawing my ideas out or not but i think im gonna explain them w words bc im better at that and i trust my ability to convey ideas that way....compared to art where i Do Not

also disclaimer this is within the context of the mini au i have created in my brain (and google docs. but i need to redo it. no longer satisfied)

anyway! tbh i had imagined yuuji as just a human, mostly bc he reminds me a lot of hide at times :') and he takes a similar role in the story i had planned, so i dont rlly have a kagune design in mind for him unforch, but if i could imagine one i'd kinda take inspo from true form sukuna and give him smth like this (saiko's kagune that she used against urie when he framed out pt 2. it's a rinkaku, i never understood the ghoul biology stuff tbsh)

megumi is the one i had the clearest idea for, he's an artificial one-eye, and again i dont understand ghoul biology, but i took design inspo from nue bc hello nue is so cool. my fav shikigami in terms of design. i havent determined how, but he does end up w a half-kakuja (probably gonna put him thru the horrors so he'll cannibalize) mostly bc i wanted to give him a beak-like mask. and then his kagune is kinda like. ayato mixed w yomo if i had to give it a good comparison. wing shaped + electricity (theyre both ukakus so ig that makes him an ukaku, im just picking things based of their techniques in jjk)

for nobara, i'm leaning towards a koukaku bc its pretty dense and durable like....a hammer :D most of the users in tg have it as a blade, but urie has used it as a blade and a shield (tsukiyama too maybe? i have urie tunnel vision hence the username) anyway im not picturing it as being exactly hammer shaped but more vague. hammer inspired if you will (rlly leaning on the technique -> kagune crutch, character design is not my forte and i cannot visualize things to save my life). i also had her as either an artificial half ghoul (quinx?) or as a full ghoul waitress at anteiku

my plot needs some serious reworking, but i have yuuji and megumi as childhood besties à la hidekane, and megumi is the one who gets kanekied (sort of). secret long term pining megumi who doesnt think yuuji would be interested bc hes focused on getting a girlfriend. he doesn't have qualms abt eating ppl, but he does worry abt killing people (at least at first, there will be spiral of doom). it rlly needs to be redone overall,,,but external circumstances prompted me to push it to the side and take up another project instead

this feels super disorganized sorry omg TT_TT i think bc i decided to nuclear bomb my previous idea recently, and now i have nothing bc i never started rebuilding the plot or anything