#and also it’s like wow I really wonder what girls wine and hockey night has that I simply could not offer. what sort of shit do they even do

[bluestonewings]

Fucking hockey and wine night with the girls orchestrating the downfall of my relationship. What the actual hell

[inyournightmares97]

I’m so sorry, anon, I accidentally deleted your ask!! But the request was essentially for a fluffy college au with Mark where they start off friends and realize they’ve been dating all along because one of them gets jealous. Here you go!

Masterlist

FriendstoLovers!au Mark

It all started, as everything in the universe inevitably does, with Jackson Wang.

You’d met Jackson in one of your classes, only because he’d been sitting in front of you you and talking so loudly that you had to tell him to shut up at least twice a day. But he simply grinned at you, never minding your nagging. It was hard to stay mad at such an energetic person.

Until one day, Jackson randomly invited you to hang out with his friends because the weather was nice and they were all apparently going to the river. You couldn’t really afford to say no. You were new to the city and had no friends beside your roommate and a few girls you talked to in one class. So you went to the river and found that Jackson and his buddies were having a picnic.

And they were good-looking. Every single one of them. Wow.

It was going rather well and you were chatting with them and having fun teasing Jackson about how he always wore snapbacks and could he please take them off in class so you could actually see the whiteboard? At which Jinyoung smiles evilly and says you should just steal it from him and watch him panic.

So you snatch the snapback off Jackson’s head and hold it up in the air gleefully, enjoying the sight of him trying to smooth down his hat hair while failing to get it back from you.

Until a strong gust of wind blows past and sudddenly the hat isn’t in your hands anymore. It’s floating face-down in the Han River and you run to the edge of the bridge and look down at it, while Jackson laughs.

“That was Mark’s hat! I borrowed it from him today!” he laughs gleefully.

And you freeze, horrified. Mark is literally the only person in the group who’s been sitting stone-faced all evening and hasn’t said a word to you. You were already kind of scared of him to begin with and now you’re positive that he’ll kill you because you dropped his hat in the river.

Except Mark only throws his head back and laughs, a wide gummy, happy child-like laugh that you never imagined could come from such a serious-looking guy. So he’s laughing, you’re laughing and suddenly everyone’s laughing.

And you’re relieved that you narrowly escaped death.

But of course, you buy him a new hat. In fact, you both go out shopping together over the weekend and end up having a blast because you try on all sorts of stupid shit that even Bambam wouldn’t be caught dead wearing. The mall you go to has a gaming arcade, and Mark is a whiz at air hockey and neither of you are allowed to leave until you’ve beat him at least once. Which takes a full two hours and even then, you’re sure he just threw the game because he was hungry and wanted pizza.

By the time night falls, you’re laughing and joking around and wondering who ever told you that Mark was quiet and shy because sure, he doesn’t say as much as Jackson but every word that comes out of his mouth is gold. Not to mention that he has a really cute smile.

And amongst all the fun you had at the mall, you guys forgot to buy the hat.

So you went back again. Obviously.

You hardly realize when you both start hanging out so much. Jackson starts getting anmoyed because you and Mark team up against him all the time, and he can’t deal with both of you at once. So he starts bringing his new girlfriend whenever he meets up with you guys.

Except Jackson’s girlfriend only really wants to go to romantic places like fancy restaurants and the amusement parks. Inevitably, you and Mark end up tagging along. You make fun of the multiple pieces of tiny cultery and see who can balance them on their glass the longest while Jackson and his girlfriend drink wine and eat dinner under candlelight.

And while Jackson and his girlfriend are snooching at the top of the Ferris wheel, you and Mark are screaming your lungs off at the roller coaster and hoping you don’t die.

It’s sort of like a double date but sort of… not.

You’re pretty helpless at this point, and you’re wondering if you should have said something sooner. Because now you’ve fallen hard for this quiet, adorable man who always has a smile for you and who gets crazy excited about the randomest things and loves dogs…

But you’re so far into the friendzone that you wouldn’t even know how to bring it up. Like you could go up to Mark and say “I love you,” and he would probably just ruffle your hair and laugh and say “I love you too.”

Which would be really pathetic. So you keep your mouth shut.

Then one day Mark sends you this link to the website of this place which lets people skydive. You’re horrified at first but he gives you an excited smile and says it sounds like so much fun. Besides, Jackson would never agree to come along because of his ‘weak heart’. Mark is giving you his puppy dog eyes and he tells you that you’re the only person he knows who would do something like this with him.

So you agree.

Of course you do. You’re in love with him. You would hand over your kidney if he asked.

So you guys drive out to the countryside and rock out to some music along the way in the hope that it might calm your nerves. When you both arrive, there’s a really buff instructor who hands you the gear and starts telling you about all the safety instructions. You simply stare at the man in shock because this is scarier than it seems. You’re not even sure if you want to do this anymore. Is Mark worth risking your life for?

“Are you okay, little lady?” the instructor asks you with a smile.

You gape at him and nod. “Uh-uh.”

The instructor laughs and glances at Mark while saying something along the lines of, “Your girlfriend’s really cute, man.”

Mark presses his lips together and looks anmoyed, but you don’t notice. You’re too terrified for your life to notice the instructor helping you with your equipment and subtlely putting his arms around you while he adjusts the gear and the buckles. Mark is watching, though, and he doesn’t look happy. He’s even more annoyed when he finds out that same instructor is going to be accompanying you on the dive.

“Can’t she and I go together?” Mark asks one of the other employees. The employee merely raises an eyebrow.

“Are you a licensed skydiving instructor? I don’t think so.”

You tremble as you all get into the helicopter and it starts going up. Mark sees the look of panic on your face and he agrees to go first. He looks nervous and you assume that he’s scared too, he is about to leap off a helicopter.

Except when he’s just about to jump off and he suddenly turns and looks at you. You’re staring at him, wondering why he isn’t jumping when he suddenly yells,

“If we both manage to get through this then be my girlfriend once we land!”

You’re flattered, really. And happy and relieved but you’re also terrified because you have to jump into thin air in a few moments.

“Are you kidding? If we get out of this alive, I’ll marry you!”

So Mark smiles his sheepish grin and turns to jump off. And then it’s your turn. It feels like your organs have turned inside out and you scream until your voice is hoarse. When you land, you’re feeling kind of light-headed and you know what Jackson means when he says his heart is too weak for these things.

But Mark is grinning widely and waiting for you, laughing as you stumble across the frass towards him on shaky legs.

“Hi,” you mumble.

He laughs and wraps his arms around you and you suddenly feel better and more stable in his warm grasp. He looks down at you with a happy smile and his eyes are shining as he smooths down your hair and strokes your cheek.

“Hi,” he replies with a chuckle.

You clear your throat. “So I guess we’re getting married now, huh?”

“Probably wouldn’t be as scary as this just was.”

At which point you realize that you adore this man and so you stand on your tiptoes and kiss him. But the stress of the day proves to be too much for your weak heart so seconds after your lips touch his, your legs give out underneath you.

So you’re just sitting there in a melted lump on the grass while Mark laughs at you.

Nice.

[punkwhodrinkstea-blog]

A Monsters’ World

I’m Not Alone!!! Hey folks, I have this interesting relationship with my parents which I always thought was kinda hard to describe and I thought it was a unique type of hell, but it’s not. So I literally Googled “Why don’t my parents care about my interests?” and I didn’t actually expect much to come up but it turns out there are hundreds and thousands of other people who go through the following issue.

 You know when a small child is telling you about some fantasy world that they just made up and you just kinda dismiss it and tell them ‘cool’ just so they’ll leave? Well I’m sad to say I’ve done that and we probably all have. But This is one of the many ways my parents. If I ever talk about something that I care about they dismiss it or trivialize it. At the end of one of my sentences they just say “Anyways” and then move on and talk about something else, not even acknowledging me and they send a clear message that what I just said, what I care about, WHO I care about and that I, do not matter to them. My dad still thinks I play Call of Duty, after 4 years of not playing it. My parents couldn’t name one of my hobbies other than gaming and you’d have to ask them directly or else they’d never think to talk about me. I’ve eavesdropped on their conversations at church several times and they never mention me, because I’m not the success or the type of success they like. I am treated like that little kid who tells them something and they treat me as if everything I just said is utterly useless and worthless. I have straight up been told to “shut up” or “stop talking” because no one wanted to hear about something I thought was worth talking about. Next is something that really bugs me. We all want to spend our time doing things that we enjoy, things that bring us joy and things that we see value in, right? Well of course. However for me, if I am not making money or in school then what I am doing is “nothing”. What I am doing isn’t worth anyone’s time and I am simply being lazy or wasting my life. My parents insult my hobbies and my way of life, they hang on every mistake and insecurity and then they wonder, “Why don’t you like to spend time with us?”. Gee I wonder you crap sack! Maybe because you hate everything I do, think, say and like. Maybe because you make me feel invisible and worthless! If I wanted to feel invisible and worthless I’d go back to school where I was picked on and was made fun of because of my hobbies and beliefs but now you guys are the bullies you dicks!

 Oh man, I guess I just needed to blow off some steam… this is very therapeutic. Anyway it turns out that so many other people have this problem and it destroyed the bond and friendship between parents and their kids, especially mine. They likely haven’t noticed that they’ve done this and they probably don’t care. 99 percent of my encounters with a family member is bad and they put me down in one way or another. I’ve said this before in my blog but frankly this is my family bullying me to some extent. Also you may have noticed that earlier in this post I said that my parents don’t care about who I care about. So that means my girlfriend. They really don’t understand my feels for her or they don’t care about my feels for her. To them she’s just some girl that I call my girlfriend (though she’s so much more than that, I’m not a fan of that label despite being true). They treat it the way people do when a kid in grade 2 says they have a crush. They brush it off as if it’s nothing and will always be nothing. I hate it and unfortunately I have to pull teeth in order to use the car to see her because simply using it when no one else is, is somehow a burden on them. I was recently working on some art for my girlfriend and it was a nice pixel art piece that took it’s fair share of time and effort. My Sister walks behind me and looks at what I was making. She says “isn’t that a lot of work just for your girlfriend?”.... WHAT!? Wouldn’t you do it if you value someone that you are in a relationship with?! What the hell is wrong with you?! Of course it’s a lot of work but it’s worth it because that’s called ‘Caring’ you stupid human! However my sister wouldn’t understand, she has never cared about anyone but herself and that’s not an insult, that’s legit true. She doesn’t do things for her friends because she feels that they “don’t deserve it” and she’s never been in a relationship even though there is a perfectly nice guy out there who’s way too good for her and to her, who has had a crush on her for years now but she won’t think twice because… he sometimes has a casual beer. I mean I just bought my girlfriend wine because who the fuck cares about a causal alcoholic drink? (responsibly of course) We are Christians but it’s not wrong to drink alcohol, it’s wrong to get drunk. Anyway this guy has bent over backwards to please her and treat her special and she won’t even look at him because he’s not her textbook perfect guy that fits her requirements. Frankly I think he’s lucky because she’s toxic, evil and stupid anyway, he’s dodging a bullet. Anyway that was a bit off track. The point is, I am locked in this house like a dog, I’m expected to not talk or do anything that may inconvenience anyone (but they’re allowed to inconvenience me) and I am to just exist happily in my own little world where no one cares about me. I am just waiting for the day that they take me out back and put me down.

 Next would be how my hobbies, don’t count as hobbies because it’s not adult like enough or simply not something they like. For example over the span of my life they have attempted countless times to pull me away from video games and do… just about anything. Soccer, hockey, gymnastics, art’s and crafts (not even the good kind), biking, wall climbing. Anything! Now none of these things are bad, in fact I can enjoy any of those things I listed but they forced me. They said I have to pick one and I ended up trying all of them but it wasn’t videogames. I loved and still Love them, no doubt due to the lack of affection, acceptance and fun that my parents never showed me. Of course after awhile they just gave up, Now I hardly see them. I live from noon hour to 6am while they are either at work, asleep or watching tv. My parents are funny though, they think that popping their head through my door and saying good night is a good way to show they love me… awwwwww, isn’t that a cute little load of crap. Another thing is when they try and tell me what I like or what I think. Like what?! How do they know? Is it magic? They don’t know anything about me but yet they can tell me what is important to me and what think. Go die. The other day I was busy helping move things to the new house (we’re moving) and we were building counters for the new kitchen and when we were finished they were excited to get home and watch a movie and I said “no thanks, I’ve got work to do”. I had to work on my book, that piece of art for my girlfriend and I that I mentioned earlier and there’s a game that I want to finish before I go off to college. All of these things are work and mean alot to me but my brother just said, “No you don’t”. He assumed that what I was doing was worthless and a waste of time.

 Now this is not entirely my family’s fault… well there bad attitudes are. However my talents, skills and idea’s of fun are… generally frowned upon by people, especially people like my family. For example when someone is a good singer or dancer or musician or athlete people think “wow I wish I could do that” instead my hobbies and skills are “worthless” and people think “what a waste of time” or “you have too much time on your hands” or “get a life”.

 Lastly after more digging around on the internet this is a clear sign that my family is toxic and full of narcissists because apparently this is how they feed themselves. Inflicting this upon me as the weaker target makes them feel dominant and gives them a sense of power. They need this to feel secure. It sucks for me but it’s easy and nice for them because they are monsters living in a world where the monster is the good guy and the good guys always win.

 Anyway folks, I definitely feel better after writing this, though I now have more research that I want to do on this matter. Peace