#and also from lots of subnautica research I did :3
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"I heard you shout. Nightmares again?"
I think this could fit schneep and Marvin?
(Used this as an opportunity for a big reveal of some new stuff for Marvin! Happy Mermay!!)
Another night- another horrible nightmare plagues Marvin’s mind. They always feel so real…
This one is… different though. He’s staring at… a version of himself. Himself stuck in his warper state- those bright pink alien eyes staring straight through him. He watches his other self get stiffer- become more robotic- and he feels himself following after. He panics- wanting to fight the sensation but his body is locking up. The warper him just barely tilts his head towards Marvin before speaking.
“Why are you denying what we are?”
“W-What?!” Marvin stammers in fear.
There’s no emotion on the other him’s face, “We are not like the other hybrids. We are not organic, we are not human. We are machines, made to serve a purpose. Why do you keep denying what we are?”
“Because I’m more than that!” Marvin shouts back, “Warpers may be machines but I… I'm me! I’m Marvin!”
“Your feeble attempts to cling to your humanity are making you weak,” The warper him says, “A human mind has so much potential. So much to unlock. You could be more powerful than any warper ever made. Maybe even on par with the architects. Yet you turn away from what you could be. Why?”
It suddenly warps so it and Marvin are face to face, pink eyes meeting teary blue.
“Are you afraid, WH-005?”
And for a moment… the voice sounded just like Zeke’s.
Marvin shoots awake and gasps, pushing himself up in the sand to shakily try to breathe. Fresh water over his gills seems to calm him down as he grips over his heart. His… heart that he can see through his chest- beating and pumping blood. But, he feels so disconnected from it. Like his body was turning into metal. And it scared him to his very core.
He yelps in surprise and fear as he feels a gentle hand on his shoulder. Then, he sees a goggled face and relaxes some. It’s just Henrik…
“I heard you shout…” The stalker hybrid says quietly, “More nightmares?”
Marvin is quiet but then slowly nods. His voice cracks a bit as he mumbles, “…t-they just keep getting worse, Hen… I-I…!”
Henrik is quick to wrap up the younger brother in a hug and shushes him gently. “It is only a dream, Marvin… they cannot hurt you.”
The warper mer is quiet in his arms for a few beats, trying to find comfort in his embrace. But the dream still lingered like poison in his mind. He pushes himself out and swims upward. “T-That’s just it, Hen! It’s… it’s not just a dream… I-it’s things I’ve been worried about- worried that I’m… I’m too different f-from…!” He cuts himself off as he bites his lip, trying not to let tears linger in his eyes.
“M-Marvin what are you-?” Schneep tries to say. But Marvin hurriedly swims past him, towards the mouth of the cove.
“I- I need to look for answers…!” Marvin says quickly then warps away before Henrik can even get up to chase after him.
———
Marvin appears in the lost river and he blinks in confusion. “…why… am I here?” He asks, his voice echoing slightly in the dark cavern. He shudders, holding his arms tight around him. He hates it down here… here is where Zeke-
You want to find answers, right? A thought echoes through his head. And with the thought comes a feeling. Pulling him forward. Like an instinct. A need.
Marvin trembles, his tails juddering in place. But, maybe there were answers here somewhere. He shakes his head and swims after the feeling, going towards the strange alien-like arches that lead to his destination.
Though, whatever this feeling is… it’s not leading him to where Zeke had him. That was a small white suit wreck- a crude Alteran attempt at making warpers themselves… at least from what he can remember. It was all really fuzzy. But now… this is leading him to a really scary looking building. One that it seems even the white suits don’t touch. Probably because it looked like it was destroyed by… something. Something big. And the entire thing was submerged underwater. Which served Marvin just fine.
Still- looking at the strange glowing green structure hidden amongst the darkest parts of the Lost River sent shivers down the warper’s spine. But, he swallowed his fear and swam inside.
Inside was a confusing labyrinth of architecture he had rarely seen. Strangely glowing and… there were so many things locked behind glass structures. Marvin swam into an open room and gasped as he saw fuana specimens tacked onto displays. He felt sick as he saw a rabbit ray… and a huge egg that kinda reminded him of Anti.
He quickly swam out of that place- seeing massive claw marks scratched into the walls and dents of damage. But soon enough he entered a place that felt way too familiar… yet like nothing he had ever seen before.
It was horrifying… an expansive room filled with- warper parts. Several parts just left in construction- an inactive warper discarded and thrown on the floor, leaving that horrid green cage open. Just like the one that Zeke kept him for weeks, back in that wrecked Alterra copy. Clearly it had been a poorer copy of this. This… this is where the original warpers must have been made.
Seeing this all has Marcin’s heart pounding wildly, his skin raked with goosebumps. Still… this place had to have the answers he was looking for, right? The answer to what he was… was he human? Was he a machine? Was he too different from his brothers? …looking around this place though, he’s not sure this has the answer he wants to hear.
As he swims forward into the lab he tries to look around for something… he’s not exactly sure what. Surely there must be information in here… like a PDA or something?
When suddenly, his tail brushes against some kind of dark cube with glowing green lines- and lights and machines start to glow and whirl around him. Marvin freezes and whips around to look- only for some of those green metal bars and wires to crash into him and hold him in place. Marvin instantly starts to panic and fights against the cage, “no no!! Not again! L-Let me go!!”
He tries to warp but whatever this stuff is made of is suppressing his powers! He feels panicked tears welling up in his eyes and tries to struggle out more, using his claws to try to get out but the cage grabs his arms and pulls them taunt to the side. Ringing is starting up in his ears, he left his mask at the cove! He can’t lose himself here! But he feels his second pair of eyes trying to open, feels his warper instincts trying to claw their way to the surface through his panic.
One of the 4 pronged fabricators creaks loudly across the ancient ceiling as it comes to rest in front of Marvin. A blue light washes across his body, scanning him. Then, a robotic voice garbles out, almost too glitched and corrupted to understand:
‘Warper agent active but incomplete. Processing power not at full capacity.’
“What?! W-What does that mean?? P-Please just let me go! I’m not just a warper I-I’m-!” Marvin sobs. But the machines don’t listen. The fabricator arm zooms around Marvin- then latches onto his neck, inserting sharp tips under his armor.
‘Detecting damage in miniaturized phase chip. Warper agent’s self-repairing technology impaired. Reactiviating-‘
A sharp shock goes through Marvin’s nerves as his back arches and he lets out a strangled gasp of pain. Something in his blood seems to pump faster, feels… different. The… the ringing… is it getting… quieter?
‘Self repairing technology back online.’
Then, the fabricator whirls and then soars over his head, latching attachments against his skull and digging in. He screams bloody murder and tries to thrash against the pain but the cage tightens around him- holding him still.
‘Expanding processing power of Agent’s brain. Please stand by.’
The computerized voice says- now clearer as if talking directly into Marvin’s mind.
Then, there’s nothing but bright blinding pain as something pushes into his skull and electricity fills up Marvin’s whole body. He’s not sure if he’s screaming or not- he feels completely detached from his body. All he can feel is the pain as something is pushed into his mind.
When he next wakes up he’s laying down on his back on one of the tables inside the warper facility. He doesn’t even remember passing out… he groans and holds his head. It’s aching and pounding. But then as he looks out- something in his vision has changed.
He sees- words. Human words. But he can fully read and understand them now. Everywhere he looks he sees things start to get highlighted in blue, like they’re being scanned before information pops up to explain it. Just like a white suit machine. Marvin screams and tries to scramble away but- he can’t escape it! It’s all he can see!
He curls up and holds hands over his eyes, sobbing hysterically in fear. “W-What is this?! W-What’s happening to me?!”
Then, he stiffens slightly and pink blooms in his eyes as words start to fill his mind. It hurts- it hurts and he tries to fight it but there’s just urge to just- repeat the words! Say them outloud- he needs to he’s programmed to-
“Warper agents' brains and central nervous systems been digitally augmented with advanced processing power and remote communications.” Marvin says in a robotic drone, eyes glazing over slightly as the information slips from his lips.
Once he’s done, the pink fades from his eyes and the pressure lightens as he gasps. His limbs begin to tremble again, no longer stiff and robotic. He claps his hands over his mouth and chokes on a sob. That fabricator- it did something to him! Did it make him even more like a warper? More like a machine?!
Marvin rockets off the platform and back out into the rest of the facility- the rest of its freaky secrets blurring around him in his panic. The second he feels like he can warp again he does- crashing into the wall of the cove with a loud thud.
Soon enough Jackie comes into view and tries to help Marvin up, “Marvin?! Marv what’s wrong? Are you okay?!”
The touch is electric, it’s too much- it feels like Marvin’s nerves are on fire! He pushes Jackie away from him and curls up, “D-Don’t touch me!”
Jackie looks hurt, “What? Marvin-!”
More bodies start to swim closer, Marvin can feel Jamie’s tentacles and hear Schneep’s panicking. Another hand tries to touch him and he shoves it off. “Stop please just- stop…!”
“Marvin, I need to see what is wrong…!” Henrik tries to say, “Is your head hurting? Do you need your mask?”
“M-Maybe we should call for Danan?” Chase suggests shakily.
Marvin tries to look out at his brothers- and he gasps as he sees his vision start to scan them. Messages pop up, showing their designations. No no- Marvin didn’t want to see those! He whimpers and the others tense as they see flickers of pink in his eyes.
“Anti, get Marvin’s mask, quickly!” Henrik shouts. The sea dragon hesitates then grabs the mask and hurries over to hand it to Marvin. “Here,” Anti whispers, looking slightly worried.
But all Marvin can see is Anti’s designation- SE-004. And the notes of ‘return to HQ at all costs.’ Marvin chokes on a sob and curls up as much as he can, digging claws into his head as he shouts out, “no no! G-Get- GET AWAY FROM ME!!”
As he shouts this- suddenly, his mask and any lingering tech around the cave start to glow with blue light. Then, they start to float in the water despite their weight. The boys all watch this in awe. Until- the objects all shoot off in different directions, causing even more crashing sounds.
Marvin dares to look up, his eyes glowing blue now instead of pink. The others stare at him with confusion and a bit of fear.
“M-Marvin…” Schneep whispers, “…what did you do?”
#huffle tales#Mermay 2024#whump requests 2024#sorry it’s late :(((#but great way to start off Mermay!!#this is me trying to figure out how to make Marvin more magical#and also from lots of subnautica research I did :3#eeee excited to see what y’all think!!#warper Marvin#warper magic#henrik von schneeplestein#reaper jackie#septnautical main story
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I swear your writing is like magical because you sea fever so fucking beautiful it made me want to go out into the ocean on a boat even tho I'm death afraid of deep open water. and honestly every time I read a fic of yours I learn like 10 new words so I think that in and of itself is a testimony of how fucking amazing your writing is. <3
Ahhhhhhhh, thank you!!!! 😭 I did a lot of research for this fic - probs the most compared to any others, but I also live/lived in harbour towns just like the one described, so it was easy to snatch pieces from real life to make it seem like I knew what I was talking about.
Also, I fully agree - the ocean is terrifying but??? Kinda beautiful when you're away from shore (but in a, "so this is what they mean when they speak of existential disbelief and cosmic dread???" sort of way. Not even a pinprick in the ocean. Less than a pixel. A humbling experience. Do not recommend for the people who get a lil queasy playing subnautica, tho).
I'm so glad you enjoyed it!!! 🖤
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We got a superior rating and won the competition! So questions: 1. How did you first learn you were aro? 2. What is your favorite video game/movie/tv show? 3. Are you in any fandoms? That is all 💚🖤💚🖤
That’s so awesome! I was hoping to get an update on the competition!!
1. I first learned when I was aro when I was 12 I think. I have been talking to a friend of mine and we somehow got onto the topic of like crushes and romantic situations. I told them that I have never experienced a crush or anything really of the sort and if I did I always ended up becoming friends with that person and then my “feelings” went away. A couple years after that point I remembered the conversation for some reason and I asked them again and since then they had come out as LGBT+ and they had learned a whole lot more than I had at that point. They explained to me about like asexuality and Aromanticism but they lead with aromanticism and told me from the very get-go that the two things were different. They asked me to explain you know my feelings and or lack there of. And they were like hey do some more research on this and maybe you’ll figure something out about yourself and once I looked more into it the aroness really clicked and made sense. 2. I don’t really play video games but I’ve watched late game plays of red dead redemption. That one looks super cool and very well thought out and the storyline looks amazing. I’ve also watched play throughs of Subnautica which looks really cool too, but I don’t have anything that’s able to play the video games so I just watch the play throughs. My favorite movie is the Road El Dorado or my bloody Valentine I think weirdly enough. My favorite TV show is Supernatural I think probably. 3. I am in the supernatural and Star Wars fandoms mostly. I watch other shows but most of my shirts are Supernatural and Star Wars so there’s really no avoiding that I’m in those fandoms. They’re also the only two things I have stuff (shirts, toys or posters) in. Thank you so much for the asks! And congratulations on your win and superior rating!
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2016 Fanfiction Round-Up
Copied this fanfic round-up from @veliseraptor because I’m always a sucker for this kind of thing and I pretty much always do some kind of fic retrospective. Also I’m only doing this on AO3, not counting FFN.
Total Year-Long Wordcount: The unfortunate thing about my inability to finish stuff in a reasonable time frame means that there’s probably a big difference between how much I wrote last year and how much I actually posted. On the other hand, something like half of “the kindness of strangers” was written prior to this year and I’m still counting everything I posted, so whatever. Adding it all up, I posted 67,504 words on AO3 (minus “adventures of tiny Loki and Thor”), but my dubiously accurate 2016 document contains 97,000 words, so...my actual wordcount for the year is probably around 85,000.
This year I wrote and posted: 16 fics, of which 3 have more than one chapter, and 53 new “adventures of tiny Loki and Thor” posts
Overall Thoughts
Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d predicted? I didn’t set a word-count goal of any kind, so...I don’t know? I’d say I did okay, although now that I’m looking at it, I feel like I should have finished/posted even more short fics than I did, which is...not a super helpful way to look at things.
What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January? Maybe the “I got pissed about Hydra Cap” one, considering I sure didn’t see that asinine “twist” coming. I also didn’t really expect I’d write so many Avengers Academy fics, although maybe I should have. Of course, those are still both Marvel. Probably the only really out-there fic was flailing in the deep, for @markiplier‘s Slime Rancher and Subnautica videos.
What’s your own favorite story of the year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you happiest? Overall, I think I’d have to say under bright stars burning--I struggled a lot with that one too, partly because it was so different from anything I’d written before (taking place over a long period of time, with two characters gradually developing a relationship, and a somewhat more meandering plot than normal because of that; plus most of it was set in the past, requiring a lot more research than usual), and I spent a lot of the writing process sure I was producing absolute garbage, but I ended up being really satisfied with it. I think it has a good arc, with vignettes that work well individually, and based on the comments, I think I did a good job writing Steve’s voice, using gradually maturing word/style choices for different life stages, and showing how he and Loki fit well together. I don’t know, I just like it a lot.
Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them? Taking the plunge and committing to one of my long-term WIPs (the kindness of strangers) for Marvel Big Bang, I suppose. I learned, uh, that trying to wrestle a story I wrote in disconnected chunks over 2+ years is agonizing but more or less possible?
From my past year of writing, what was….
My most popular story of this year: Not counting the adventures of tiny Loki and Thor, my fic with the most kudos was the state of my head (228), followed by “under bright stars burning” (178), Metal Gear Widow (137), and “the kindness of strangers” (131). By comments, it’s pretty much the same but in a different order: “the kindness of strangers” (58 comment threads), “under bright stars burning” (32), and “the state of my head” (16). If you go by percentage of kudos to hits, it’s “the state of my head” (13%), “the kindness of strangers” (12%), I’m your national anthem (12%), and “under bright stars burning” (10%). Also I’m sure that’s way more than anyone wanted to know.
Most fun story to write: Maybe “the state of my head”; I got inspired by a prompt, it all came together quickly, and I knocked it out in a weekend. Writing from Tony’s POV was fun, too. “flailing in the deep” was another one where I got to be funny.
Story with the single sexiest moment: Literally the only semi-explicit sex scene (by which I mean, I didn’t fade to black but I also didn’t describe specific body parts) I’ve ever written was for let your colors bleed and blend with mine (Crimson Peak, Thomas/Edith) and that was right at the end of 2015 so it doesn’t quite count. Otherwise there’s a kissing scene in “under bright stars burning” but it’s...not very sexy...
Most “Holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you” story: uhhhhh. well, “the kindness of strangers” probably has the most/nastiest Loki whump I’ve posted on AO3 thus far, to the point that I think a few readers were surprised, so I suppose there’s that??
Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: I hadn’t really written Steve before “under bright stars burning” and that ended up being a reasonably long fic all from his POV, at different points throughout his life, so writing that one definitely gave me a better sense of him as a character.
Hardest story to write: Gonna have to go with “the kindness of strangers,” which should be obvious to anyone who noticed me screaming about Marvel Big Bang for the last several months.
Biggest Disappointment: I’m not great with deadlines, as everyone probably knows, so pretty much every time I sign up for anything with a deadline, I end up causing myself a lot of stress and just barely squeaking in under the wire, often with less of a story than I originally planned, or actually a little bit after the deadline in one way or another. I’ve often been especially bad about this with Yuletide, posting an unfinished placeholder on the deadline and then getting it actually done before reveals; way back in 2011, I never did get it done and they had to send it out for a pinch hit the night before reveals, and I still feel bad about that (and keep intending to go back to the fic I was trying to write). This year I got caught doing it again and although I did end up posting a complete story, I’m definitely not happy with it because it’s like...one third of the story I meant to write. I still intend to finish it, but the fact that I didn’t is frustrating.
Biggest Surprise: Nothing comes to mind.
Most Unintentionally Telling Story: I’ve written exactly two Marvel-related fics that aren’t about Loki, and they’re both about Steve, one where he’s progressive and mad at the whole world, and another where Avengers Academy Steve realizes he’s on the aro/ace spectrum. That probably says something.
Favorite Opening Line(s):
At this point, Tony is running almost entirely on adrenaline and good old-fashioned Stark bravado (patent pending), so he’s pretty much prepared for things to go completely to shit at any second. The particular variety of shit remains to be seen, but honestly, shit is shit and he’s mostly just banking on JARVIS deploying the new suit before Loki switches from talking to shooting. (the state of my head)
“What the fuck is this?” (I’m your national anthem)
Dorian was worried about the Inquisitor. This was hardly unusual, to be fair; in fact it was so far from being a new state of affairs that when Dorian wondered briefly what it would be like to live without at least a vague background worry for Elden, he came up blank. (another year)
For as long as Gamora has known him, Thanos has been a collector, entirely unmatched. He has been so for much longer than that, in fact; Gamora herself and all her siblings are proof. (the kindness of strangers)
Favorite Line(s) from Anywhere:
“I wouldn’t say nervous,” he hedges. Nervously. (the weight of it all)
“I’ve never stood for any of that shit, and I’m sure as hell not going to let anybody pretend Captain America stands for it either. That’s not—I won’t give more power to that kind of hatefulness. If people want to be bigots, fine, that’s on them, but they do not get to use this symbol to spread and validate their hate.” (I’m your national anthem)
There’s about five seconds of resounding silence, during which Loki shivers and barely seems to be breathing and Tony keeps rubbing his shoulder because apparently this is his life now, and then Barton says, “What the fuck, Stark?” (the state of my head)
Loki growls under his breath and makes a sharp gesture that sends another robot flying. “End program,” he snaps, and glowers at Natasha again. “Did you have a point, or did you simply wish to drag me back to the infatuated horde slavering for my brother’s return?” Natasha tilts her head. Whatever else you could say about Loki (and there’s a lot), he sure has a fancier vocabulary than most people she knows. (getting the gang together)
He is a being of countless interwoven myths and stories, the precise intersection of which seems to shift every time he tries to examine it, and eventually he stops trying, because he is no longer sure that it is relevant to what he is doing here. One thing, in all this, is constant: always, he is Loki, and he knows more than almost anyone that identity is malleable, that facts and truth are not always perfectly interchangeable. (we could be heroes)
“I see,” Loki says. He does, actually; he has studied and used enough magic to know that some laws of reality simply are, immutable no matter the power of the one seeking to change them. This knowledge does nothing to make him feel any less weary, and for a moment he thinks the weight of all this really will crush him, that he lacks the strength to do anything but sink into the dust of this barren realm and sleep there forever. (in death’s other kingdom)
haha so it turns out I liked a bunch of lines in this year’s long fics so I’m just gonna...list those separately at the bottom...
Top 5 Scenes from Anywhere You Would Choose to Have Illustrated:
"under bright stars burning,” Steve and Loki hanging out on Coney Island, especially the bit where they’re sitting on the boardwalk railing watching the beach with the Wonder Wheel behind them
ditto, the kissing scene :3
anything?? those are the only two scenes that really come to mind in a “oh man I wish someone would draw this, it would be super cute” way, but 1) “the kindness of strangers” already has a bunch of awesome art from @neurovicky, which is amazing, and 2) I am thrilled with literally any fanart of my fics
Fic-writing goals for 2017:
continue writing at least a little bit every day
continue to post at least one new short fic to AO3 each month (last year I said “even if it’s a new ‘adventures of tiny Loki and Thor’ or ‘Custom figures’ chapter” but I managed even without that, I think, barely, so I should be able to do it again
continue to try focusing on fucking finishing some of the many, many, many fics languishing on my WIP list, especially the shorter ones that I really should have written and posted months or even years ago
more specific fic goals:
finish “the kindness of strangers” part III
finish the rest of my Yuletide fic haha whoops
New Year’s Resolution fic because my actual Yuletide fic was late, more whoops
that damn Stoki Week fic I started back in June
“Avengers Academy: Friendship Is Magic”
finish the rest of always gold to me
shit, I should get back to winter in our bones
and work on a followup to “under bright stars burning”
I don’t knowwww there are so many others
Favorite lines from “under bright stars burning” because sure why not, please note these are all very spoilery if you want to read the fic and haven’t:
“You would [like Thor],” Loki says, like it’s a law of the universe. “Thor is…bright, and boisterous, and everyone loves him, even when they are displeased with him. He is impossible to ignore. And I am…not him.”
He darts a glance toward Steve and then away, studying the shoreline, and Steve is suddenly struck by how beautiful Loki is. He’s noticed before, but not quite like this, with the breeze ruffling Loki’s hair and the sun highlighting those fine, sharp features Steve is always itching to draw. He doesn’t just want to draw Loki now, though; mostly he’s wondering what it would be like to kiss him.
Steve sighs, shoulders slumping, and gives up on the attempt at a smile. “It’s my mom. She…working in the TB ward finally caught up to her.” He swallows hard around the lump in his throat, which seems to be growing sharp points with every word. “The funeral was today.”
Loki gives him a look that somehow combines concern with profound skepticism.
Steve nods, his gut twisting uneasily as more threads of the nightmare come into focus, connect, begin to compose a larger picture. The golden prince in the red cape, blinding and bright, with a shadow no one ever notices. Cheers and thunderous applause (but not for the shadow, never for the shadow). His hand turning blue and ridged in the monster’s grip, and horror freezing the breath in his lungs more effectively than the glacial cold. A glowing blue box radiates cold and his hands turn blue as he touches it monster monster monster and revulsion is so thick in his throat he thinks he’ll choke on it. Rage and terror, rage and terror, no more than another stolen relic, claimed to love me, tell me tell me tell me, never wanted never loved never real and fear again. A corona of golden light. A spear and a throne and plans plans plans he will do it he will show them he is right, is worthy (is nothing but the monster parents tell their children about at night)—
Desert. Blood on the sand. A bridge. Battle, galaxies hanging suspended overhead. An explosion that sends him flying, his grip on the spear the only thing holding him above the abyss, but he has no reason to hold on and so he lets go and falls falls falls—
Bucky falls and Steve can’t catch him. Schmidt takes off with the Tesseract and Steve can’t stop him. Instead he sits at the Valkyrie’s controls and makes a date with Peggy that they both know he won’t make and tries not to think that even as Captain America, all he can do is fail the people he cares about, over and over again. Tries, fruitlessly, not to spend his last moments wishing he had more time with any of them, and then he sends the Valkyrie into the water.
And then Loki moves, quick as thought, already inside Steve’s guard, and Steve has no time or space to block him (and barely the space of a breath for a rush of horrified betrayal) before the tip of his scepter is pressed to Steve’s heart. Everything else disappears in a blaze of consuming blue light.
He is drowning in pain and anger, and then (no, Loki) despair overwhelms everything else, and he opens his hand, and he falls.
Under other circumstances, Loki thinks he might be impressed with his captors’ efficiency. They are expending no apparent effort and still grinding him down, and he does not want to think what it means, that this all must be in preparation for something—or that perhaps it is not, and he truly does not know which thought is worse.
He knows Thanos is too powerful. To think otherwise comes near to blasphemy.
It is fitting, he supposes, that the monster should destroy everything that was once good in its life, even this. Steve does not deserve this, does not deserve to suffer for unknowingly befriending a monster and finding himself inevitably drawn into the monster’s fate, but he will, and Loki can almost feel his spine bending under the weight of his own despair.
Favorite lines from “the kindness of strangers” because ditto, and ditto on spoilers:
This is truth: Thanos is patient like Death is patient, with the calm surety that the universe will bow to his will in the end no matter how long it takes.
Gamora was never nice except when it suited her, even before; was already hard, and fierce in her defense of anything she considered hers, and so once Thanos had broken and remade her, she had something left of herself, harder even than the shell he made her create.
She is a daughter of Thanos, by necessity and unyielding determination (and by something she refuses to call desperation, even in her own mind), but she is also the last surviving member of the Zehoberei race. This second identity is not one she considers often; at best it is not useful to the life she leads now, and at worst it is dangerous, but it still exists, always, alongside anything else Thanos might make of her—a kind of sacred responsibility, almost, even if she has little time or patience for religion or superstition. And the last survivor of the Zehoberei, in the name of all the unknown dead that she alone carries, burns with quiet rage at the idea of Thanos gaining the power to wipe out another race.
“I would take you for a Valkyrie,” he says, quiet and hoarse, “but if that were so you would not come to me, for I cannot succeed even at dying and I know Valhalla is barred to me.”
Yes, she is afraid of Thanos, afraid down to her marrow, and any thinking being should be as well, and perhaps everything else she tells herself—everything else she holds close as evidence that she does not belong to him—is merely an excuse for her own cowardice.
But the truth that matters the most in this case is simple: her reasons have not changed, and they far outweigh her pity for Loki (and her desire to prove to herself that she is not a coward). Whether they are still good reasons or merely excuses to salve what remains of her conscience is immaterial.
This is another truth: Gamora does not like to think in terms of what she can and cannot do. It is too much like helplessness, to look too long at the choices she is denied, and she learned a long time ago that helplessness is a short step away from death or worse. Instead she assesses situations and finds choices to make, and then she chooses, and she does not regret or look back—even when the choices are impossible or effectively meaningless. There is always, always a choice of some kind to be made, and to choose is to regain some measure of control over the situation, no matter how small. If she chooses, she cannot be forced one way or the other, and therefore she is not helpless.
“Soon,” Thanos tells her, his expression satisfied, and something unpleasant curls in Gamora’s stomach, the same mingling of fear and relief she feels whenever Thanos is pleased.
The titan smiles down at him, something both paternal and predatory in his gaze.
Slowly the blankness in his expression is replaced by something just as sharp and feral as the first time Gamora laid eyes on him, only now it is more wary, more focused, both more and less desperate. ... Every now and then, Thanos tells Loki that he is pleased with his progress, and Loki smiles to hear it, and his smile is like a brittle blade.
And for a long moment that freezes the blood in her veins like shards of ice, all she can think is I have failed. She has not done enough, and Terra is going to fall like her world did so long ago, all because she was so determined to wait for the right moment.
“It’s really not that complicated,” Romanoff says, and then: “I’ve got red in my ledger. I want to wipe it out.” There is…a cadence to it, something he knows, not the words but the sense of…something practiced, repeated, held close…
“Because look, he busted up a town because of a fight with his brother, singlehandedly destroyed a SHIELD installation, took out a guy’s eyeball, and threatened a freaking Holocaust survivor. Even if he doesn’t want to be this Thanos’s tool, he’s still a tool in general.”
“Gentlemen,” Fury snaps, “if you’re going to have a pissing contest, do it on your own time. I’m not asking you to like each other or the God of Crazy, I’m asking if you’ll put on your big boy pants for five seconds, do what’s necessary, and work together.”
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Meet the Authors: Huffle!
1) What's your name?
I’m Huffle! Also known as Huffle-Dork!
2) Who are you?
I’m the one of the authors and the artist for Septnautical! I run another jse blog that’s not so great :P
3) How did Septnautical start?
Well I had the original concept idea for Jackie and posted the first picture (our icon!) a little bit after a septicart event last year to boost my morale and just keep working cuz I was just kinda bummed about the event overall.( I tried my hand at the first concept got sea emperor jack for the event and it just didn’t turn out how I wanted.) Then I started researching and looking at the other boys but… I was too worried about the work of it all. But Juri messaged me one night just so intrigued about the whole concept and we ended up talking for hours! I was already working on my first JSE fanfiction at the time and I knew how well Juri could write so once she helped me figure out how the boys could feasibly live on Subnautica and had the semblance of a story I was like… you wanna run a blog with me and write about these boys? Like half these ideas were yours- and she accepted like right away so Septnautical was born! Like 4 months later I found out that whole week she was high off painkillers from a survey XD
4) Who's your favorite Septnautical boy?
I have to say Jackie! He’s the easiest to write for me and super fun to draw!
5) What was your favorite story to write?
I really loved the captured arc! I was so excited to finally have the boys finally get to Jack even if for a second! When I came up with the idea I remember just hounding Juri with messages just so excited! It’s one of the pieces I’m most proud of.
6) What is your favorite genre to write?
WHUMP!! Give me hurt and injured characters ANY DAY! I lovee that shit! Or like sickness, fevers, fatigue all that it’s so much fun! And mind control/Brainwashing is tied for whump! Can you see now why septnautical is the way it is? Lol
7) What are some strengths of yours in writing?
I’m really proud for how I can describe scenes I guess? Usually when I draw a scene later I get people saying “that’s exactly how I pictured it!” Or I get “I can picture this so well!” And I take that as a big compliment! I’m also pretty proud of how I do dialogue most of the time!
8) What are some weaknesses?
Um typos and grammar probably… I never paid much attention to that stuff in high school or college or it never stuck in my head cuz I never thought I’d be a writer- damn you past me! Also a lack of motivation… I have lots of ideas I just need to sit down and write! But that’s really hard a lot of the time!
9) How has Sepnautical impacted you?
It has impacted me in more ways than I thought! It brought a lot of lovely people in my life who are now my best friends. It’s really pushed me as a writer even with this huge hiatus and now I can probably say I’m a writer and that’s pretty cool! I know this blog won’t make us money or make us famous but it’s definitely made me some lifelong friends and something I’ll remember, and it’s not even a year old yet!!
10) Any hints for us about upcoming projects for Sepnautical?
Yes!! We have a brand new arc coming and I’m excited for it! I’m hoping it will give us a lot more fodder for more frequent stories and hopefully, more interaction with you guys! A lot of inspiration is from blogs like reverseblackofwords and septic-dr-Schneep where you get to interact and get prompts from the readers! I feel like that’s gonna be a little easier in this new arc, fingers crossed!
Also I want to do so many more illustrations for septnautical! I’m working on refs and something I’m calling observatory boys as a steaming project but I’d love to see if y’all have any favorite scenes you’d like to seen drawn! Feel free to submit suggestions in the ask box! ;3
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