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varjopeura · 3 days ago

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OC Tag Game

@parad0xymoron tagged me into this (a good while back, actually)! Thank you so much for letting me ramble about my favourite chew toy! :3

I'm too shy to tag anyone right away, but hey, if anyone reading this (yes i mean YOU) would like a chance to talk about their oc, please please PLEASE consider yourseld tagged! I want to learn which of my mutuals and followers have wonderful characters to share, for real!!!

(I have such a hard time drawing Tomu, her face just resists any attempts to being depicted in my style and current skill level. The silly little fake moustache pic here is still easily one of my favourite drawings of her, it looks more like her than anything else I've managed to do.)

— GENERAL

Name: Todenmukaisuus (= Veracity), a name she picked up herself to become a better liar. Who could ever blame her for dishonesty when even her name is Truth itself? If you insist on getting a last name too, she will begrudgingly add she's from the Callan family. I don't think she's ever uttered the phrase 'Todenmukaisuus Callan'. It just feels wrong.

Alias: Tomu for friends and acquaintances! Besides her real name, she also uses several fake names and personas when the situation calls for them, her favourite being Rosalie Clairmont, a human alchemist and an honorable trader. Rosalie has her entire own backstory, design and web of contacts - it's only now dawning on me that my oc practically has an oc of her own!

Gender: Cis woman. (It's funny, I always presumed that my issues with my assigned sex would bleed in all of my characters at least in some way, but Tomu is so fully, so joyously a woman, without a shadow of a doubt in her mind about it. I love experiencing gender through her.)

Age: 24-ish? I haven't ever really locked this one in, I might be off by a year in either direction. Also there's the fact that time keeps going on in our rpg campaign, so whatever number I give will slowly creep up as the years go by. The important thing is that she's still practically a wee baby seeing the world in her own terms for the first time.

Spoken Language: Common and Infernal. She took a few lessons in Infernal in her youth, but other than that learning new languages was never much of a priority to her (or her parents). She was very much raised with the expectation that she'd stay in her hometown her entire life, taking care of the family business, so it was never necessary to learn anything more.

Sexual Orientation: Bisexual. This doesn't come up very often in the game, so I'm still figuring out if her preferences lean more heavily in one direction or the other.

Occupation: Adventurer and snake oil salesman, focusing more and more on the adventuring part as time goes by. Turns out it feels nice to actually help people for real sometimes! Her fake potion business is slowly turning from a profession to a side hustle to a hobby, though I wouldn't dismiss the chance she'll get right back into it after the adventuring life gets more peaceful again.

— FAVOURITE

Colour: Tomu often gravitates toward deep vibrant reds and bright gold - they look good, they look good together, and they look good on her. You gotta keep a nice consistent color scheme going on when you want to look like you're living in the lap of luxury! She does also enjoy cerulean blue a lot, it reminds her of the seaside and feelings of freedom.

Entertainment: Her absolute favourites were the firework shows in Hupperdook! Huge colorful explosions just for fun! That there is her shit and it should actually happen everywhere every night. Maybe she should figure out how to produce fireworks herself? Music is also good, especially if there's dancing involved. Any entertainment where she can have a chance to participate in some way is preferable to just sitting still and quietly enjoying.

Pastime: Arts and crafts babeyyy! Assuming that carefully drawing the correct lines in a forged document counts as arts, and that mixing fake potions and building fun little gadgets for her spellworks count as crafts. Tomu is full of creative energy flowing into every direction, and getting to get hands-on on stuff and doing things is the best activity she can imagine. She is also a bit of a party animal, and will seize any excuse to spend the night with a lot of people and music and drinks and dancing and sharing stories. Also, traveling! Experiencing new places! Sightseeing! There is so much to see in the world and she's fully planning on visiting as many new places in it as is humanly possible.

Food: I… don't think she even has one? Tomu is one of those people who only eat to survive, and she hardly ever pays any mind to what she is actually eating. She will notice the general quality of the food and certainly appreciates nicer meals over the less succesful ones, but in the end it doesn't really matter to her what the dish is. If left to her own devices, she'd probably subsist on nothing but quick snacks every now and then to keep the hassle of eating things minimal. It's a good thing her best friend Kato is an avid cook, so the girl gets at least some nutrients in her regularly :D

Drink: If you ask Tomu, she'll answer with any of the fanciest options available at the moment. Probably a nice wine on the more expensive side. There's always the chance you're going to offer her her favourite drink, so why not go for something extra luxurious in the moment! In reality, she finds light, fruity and refreshing flavors the most enjoyable. Doesn't really matter if it's a cup of tea or a heavily alcoholic cocktail with the fantasy equivalent of a silly straw and paper parasol stuck in it, if the flavor profile hits the right notes she'll love it. Bonus points for extravagant presentation and any decorations added in, of course.

— HAVE THEY…

Passed University: No university for her! It actually occurs to me I don't have much details on what sort of education she has received in her younger years. Certainly something besides what her parents could've teached her at home, but did the family hire a tutor to teach the girls? Did they maybe go to some sort of organized public school with other kids in town? What sort of schooling system there is in Wildemount?? I genuinely don't know! All this to say, Tomu hasn't received much else than a pretty basic level of education, and a lot of practice in reading, writing and calculus working at the family shop. She's definitely got the wits for getting a higher education, but none of the patience required for it.

Had Sex: She has. Not that much and not that often - give her a bit of time and she'd prooobably be able to recall each individual time it happened. All of it was just a series of super casual hookups during her years in Harha's guild (never with Harha himself), just friends and colleagues exploring each others' bodies for some fun. It was never publicly stated that she was 'Harha's girl' - and in her own mind, she of course never was - but I can't help but wonder if any casual fuckbuddy situation with her was quietly discouraged from turning into anything more serious.

Had Sex in Public: She hasn't, but she likes to give the impression that she has. It… makes her seem more worldly, more cool, and thus more likeable (her thoughts, not mine). It wasn't that long ago that during one of our games our party cleric, Musta, mentioned she didn't know what an orgy is, and Tomu eagerly offered to take her to one once they got back to the city. Like she even knew how to find one in the first place! Like she wouldn't completely freeze up in anxiety if she tried to participate in one! I truly don't think she'd be ready for it, and I don't know if it'd be something she'd ever actually enjoy. Luckily for her, the offer did never come up again.

Got Tattoos: No tattoos, though I'm sure she'd want some if the thought occurred to her. What sort of images and where, that'd be a spur-of-the-moment decision when the chance to get one comes.

Got Piercings: Yes! On her left horn she's got a row of five piercings with little gold rings on them, and a small red jewel dangling from the middlest ring. She loves them SO much. I also sometimes draw her with ear piercings, just the standard one per lobe, but haven't quite made the decision if they're actually canon or not. And knowing that she's rocking a Hat of Disguise at all times, I also don't have to decide! Sometimes they're there, sometimes not. Depending on her mood I suppose.

Got Scarred: Tomu has surprisingly few visible scars considering her occupation and the amount of fights she gets herself into. Hidden underneath her hair there is a jagged scar from the time an ogre's club pummeled her near to death, and on her side there's an odd discolored patch of skin where a hit from an animated statue crushed her ribs and sucked her life force away from the wound. If you run your hands on her body, you can find a few bumps where a broken bone has healed kinda weirdly, and a few tiny nicks from arrow hits here and there. The most noticeable scarring comes from her early teenage years, when she occasionally tried to cut or file off her horns in an attempt to maybe look a little bit more human. She never got very deep with these cuts, but the various scratch marks on the bases of her horns still remain.

Had a Broken Heart: Not in the strictly traditional romantic sense, but oh boy how badly her heart has broken when we look beyond that! So, sometimes you have a best friend who is also your mentor and your boss, and the only person who has ever truly understood you, the absolute centre of you universe, whom you love with all your heart. And sometimes, when you hit your twenties you realize you want to travel and see the world, even if that means not living with your best friend slash mentor anymore. You could still make it work, you could still have fun, you could still be friends. Right? And maybe, in response to this, your best friend forbids you from ever leaving, as he owns you, owns everything you are and will ever be. As you only exist because of his belevolence and mercy. And then you get locked up in the cellar of his guild house for months on end, nurturing your freshly broken heart, re-evaluating everything you knew about your so-called friend, while being constantly gaslit to believe that there's nothing wrong between the two of you, that you are out of your mind to think that he would ever hurt you in such horrible ways. Maybe you just need to rest a little while, to not work so hard for a bit. To just stay still and silent. And when you're ready to accept his friendship again, he says, he'll be there for you. He'll always be there for you. It took all of Tomu's willpower and cunning to escape that situation. It's already been a couple of years, and these days Harha lays dead in the ground, but the heart still hasn't stopped hurting.

— ARE THEY…

A Cuddler: Not really, no. Tomu gets super self-consious about herself when in close contact with other people, so she tends to avoid hugs and cuddles as best as she can. The only exception to this seems to be Kato, who as her current best friend gets the priviledge of getting close to her physically. Even with him, Tomu prefers just leaning against his shoulder or sitting with their legs tangled into each other as opposed to actual cuddle time.

Scared Easily: If anything, she should be more easily scared! She is young, free and skilled at her job, and that comes with a certain level of feeling invincible. She's often a bit reckless in her actions, because hey, what's the worst that could happen? And if that did happen, wouldn't her friends just save her like they've already done several times? It's going to be fine and she's not willing to miss out on anything just because it might "look too dangerous"!

Jealous Easily: Tomu doesn't let anyone see it, but she does experience frequent pangs of jealousy over her friends. Deep down she is a people-pleaser with a major fear of abandonment, which makes her strive for always being the most fun, the most interesting, the best person available at all times. And when she eventually fails to keep everyone's attention on her, there's the sick little twist in her stomach: did she just lose to that thing/person/event? She's not going to get replaced by it, right? (And then we met Tomu's sister in our adventures and learned that Leonora is now Harha's favourite little student and pet project - getting replaced by her sister reaching Tomu's spot in her abuser's heart was a very painful can of worms for us to open! Many complicated feelings she did not want to feel!!)

Trustworthy: Depends on who you are! If you just met her, she's likely going to swindle you out of all your money and disappear. Or not, if she's not in the mood for it. You can't even trust her to be consistent in her habits. But with her close friends? She is extremely reliable, and will go to great lengths to help them in any way she can if they are in need of help. To her friends, her word is just as truthful as her name suggests.

— FAMILY…

Siblings: Tomu has a sister, Leonora, two years her senior. Human, like her parents - Tomu, as a tiefling, is the odd one out in this family. The relationship between the sisters has been a bit of a bumpy one: as small kids they were inseparable, and later on Leonora took on the role of the no-fun-allowed older sister who snitched on all of Tomu's "fun ideas" to their parents and got her into constant trouble. These days Leonora is openly hostile towards Tomu for ruining their family's lives (which, in all fairness, she did, albeit mostly as an accident). And Tomu would love to fix this and get her dear sister back, if it wasn't for the fact that teasing her and angering her is just. so so so easy. Irresistible. The couple of times the sisters have met each other during the campaign have ended in nothing but childish bickering.

Parents: Tomu's parents tried their best raising a surprise tiefling kid, and most (but definitely not all) of the time did okay. Hers was an okay childhood. The parents used to run a fairly succesful general store in their hometown, until Tomu's secret hobby of practicing her forgery skills in their accounting books made the family lose their fortune and kick Tomu out on the streets. She hasn't spoken to her parents in years, and these days her parents are somewhere, hiding, their memories magically modified to believe that Tomu has threatened them with extreme violence. Which definitely feels like a situation she needs to fix, maybe, at some point, but so far she has found many good excuses to put this task off indefinitely.

Children: None yet, but she wants to have at least one! I have a little bit of an idea of what her first child would be like, but I'll try to keep it vague and not set it in stone until the child actually exists in canon. What I can say, though, is that Tomu would be absolutely insufferable as a mother. Her child would get everything she didn't have as a kid - that is, complete hands-off freedom to do whatever, no limitations or rules whatsoever. Tell her child 'no' and face the mother's wrath.

Pets: None, and honestly? She shouldn't have any! The fun new animal will keep her attention for a couple of days, max, and then she'll promptly forget about it. There's so much else to occupy her thoughts, so many things she needs to experience right away! Who has time for food bowls or litter boxes when there's the world to see! The most likely pets to hold her interest would maybe be spiders or lizards, she loves encountering various species of them.

#thank you so much for tagging me into this! this was so much fun!!#oc tag #todenmukaisuus

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dinosquad-central · 2 years ago

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Okay, longer post about a headcanon that is completely integral to my enjoyment of Dino Squad. (Largely copy/pasted from my rant on the Discord server)

I think Caruso might actually be very smart. Genuinely, classically, academically smart.

I know that sounds like a crackpot theory, but hear me out!

He's in the same science class as Rodger (the guy who's explicitly stated to be the smartest kid in school), as well as Fiona (who's also clearly very intelligent), Buzz (maybe not top marks, but since it appears to be a biology class, and Buzz is especially interested in animals it makes sense he'd be in a more advanced bio-class). Max may not be a genius, but most schools require members of the school sports teams to maintain a certain GPA, and he’s on the football team, so he can't be a complete idiot either.

And Caruso is in the same class as them and therefore it's implied that he's at the same level as them in that subject! Because of this, and the fact that the classroom is a lecture hall and not a regular classroom, I also headcanon that it's an AP bio class, or at least honors.

Plus! When Caruso told his parents he was dinosaur, their one insistence was that he not neglect his studies meaning A) his family cares about his education and B) he probably gets at least relatively good grades already.

AND! It's shown in the show that Caruso regularly and *easily* manipulates his friends into doing his homework for him (episode: “who let the dog out”). He also manipulated others during the show, including a TV producer or show host, I can’t remember which (episode: “Zoom in on Zoom” I think). You can't be that deliberately manipulative and a complete idiot like Caruso appears to be.

ALSO Caruso has a line of beauty products which he both invented, and markets/sells himself (episode: “Scents and Scents Ability”), meaning he must also have a small company/business that he personally runs, and the quality of his products are good enough to have a whole spa treatment devoted exclusively to them, which is named after him/his product, meaning the products themselves must be well known and trusted enough to attract customers. This demonstrates that Caruso has some level of skill with chemistry and botany (iirc he made herbal moisturizers but it's been a while, so that detail may be wrong). In addition to that he must have a good sense for business, finance, and marketing.

But wait! There's more! When they were trapped in a cage with seemingly no way out, it was Caruso who came up with the plan to use misdirection and social engineering to trick Veloci into not only letting them go, but also donating a sizeable amount to a local charity as hush money (episode: who let the dog out”). It wasn’t genius Rodger, or leader Max, or competent female character Fiona, it was Caruso, “the dumb one”. This indicates that he can also think on his feet and come up with quick solutions to difficult problems.

Furthermore! A lot of highly intelligent people learn to act like they're stupid because when people know how smart you are, they have high expectations of you, and that's stressful to the point of traumatizing sometimes. There's also an interesting type of stigma around intelligence where people tend to think you're pompous or unapproachable when you're highly intelligent and become intimidated or resentful, which, since Caruso highly values his popularity, would be extremely distasteful to him. Given his fixation with fame and popularity, I don't think it's a stretch at all to think he'd dumb himself down, even around his friends, to avoid that stigma.

So yeah, there you have it. That’s all the reasons (that’s I can think of at the moment, anyway) why I believe Caruso is a big fat liar pretending to be an idiot so he doesn’t have to be responsible for anything. I hope I’ve managed to convince you all because I am 100% committed to this theory lol.

#feel free to use this headcanon in any of your creations I encourage it #please note however that I may have cited some episodes incorrectly by mistake #I know all of these things happened but I’m bad at connecting episode titles to events #i did my best #dinosquad #dino squad #erwin caruso #dinosquad headcanons #dino mod #character analysis #long post

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anonymousinthisworld · 1 year ago

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Why do I feel like you are going to hurt me, even though you said that you wouldn’t? Am I stupid for believing you? Am I stupid for believing in you? I want to believe that you are the good guy. I’ve seen it in the way you treat me. But I feel like I am going crazy because I confronted you and you looked straight at me and said no. Even when I had insisted that you were lying, you continued to say no. In fact, you told me that you wanted to see if she was worthy of me. I was speechless. I never felt so special like I meant that much to you. It sounded like you wanted me to be in good hands. It sounded like you wanted me to have the best because you believed that I deserved nothing less. Or maybe you were referring to her physical appearance. Who knows. Either way, how can I believe what you said when everyone else would probably make a liar out of you? I want to believe you so badly, but I am afraid that you will hurt me and leave me looking foolish. I’ve heard things about you, but not once did you ever fail to show me those things. You never hid them from me and I appreciate that. Maybe you aren’t a liar after all.

Why do I feel like once again everything is falling apart? Why does everything feel so familiar? Kind of like deja vu? Like I had lived through this before? Maybe because I already have. Why does the past keep coming back? “Nostalgia is denial of the painful present”. Is this why the past has become my oldest friend? I recently find myself resorting back to the “good old days”. I somehow find comfort in the past while being conflicted simultaneously because as there were bad moments, there were also good ones. I still remember the good times I had with the ones who are no longer in my life. In fact, I remember everything. The good, the bad, and the ugly. I don’t miss the people who had done me wrong. Only the memories. I miss the things that created those memories. The things that reminded me of the good times when those times were much more simple than what is it now.

Why does it feel like I am about to lose everything? My life is like a domino effect. When one knocks down, the rest of them follow. I already got rid of one, but who is to say that I wouldn’t eventually get rid of you? I don’t want to, but am I stupid for keeping you around when you don’t want a relationship? Even though I don’t want to hop into one either? Not that I wouldn’t want to be in one with you, but you told me that you don’t want to be in one because you recently got out of one. And not to only put it all on you, but let’s just say that I am complicated too. It doesn’t matter what we call ourselves. As long as you care about me as I do about you. I still want to get to know you better. I still want to see where things go. Truth be told, I want to see if there will ever be a light at the end of the tunnel. Some kind of happy ending for us, even though those only exist in fairytales. I don’t need an official title from you. I want you and I don’t want anyone else to ruin what we have. I want to keep you safe from everyone else. I want to protect you. To protect us. The way that I couldn’t in the past.

What am I really afraid of? Not commitment that’s for sure. I want to only commit to you, but I have a hard time imagining my life with you in it when things are not at all perfect. I am struggling to fit you into my messiness. I want things to be perfect, but they aren’t. I don’t want to expose you to the imperfect parts of my life along with my baggage only for you to run away. What would be the point? I clearly have trust issues. I do not trust people enough to fully let them in unless they are in it for the long haul. You are starting to see how negative I can be. Does that scare you? Am I not who you expected me to be? Does that make me a fraud? Do you feel deceived?

Why do you still want me around? I bet you can see that I am falling harder for you every time I see you. I think it is safe to say that I am most definitely falling for you. I can’t get you out of my head. Eventually this wall of mine will tumble down and all I will be left with is feeling raw. I feel that you are ignoring the truth regarding my feelings for you. Is this why I sometimes feel you distant? Hoping that I won’t fall harder for you after each moment we spend together? Or is that part all in my head? Because you asked me not to go and you wanted me to come back even if it was only for one day.

You reciprocated those feelings, but why is it that I still doubt you? Why am I convinced that I misunderstood you when you told me that you have feelings for me too? You said that we were “good friends” and friends can have sex. Isn’t that what we call “friends with benefits” though? Apparently not because you said that I meant more to you than simply having sex and then kicking me out of your bed. However, you still refer us as friends. Friends is what you want us to be. But how can I be your friend when I never saw you as one for having these feelings? You have feelings for me too, yet you want to remain only friends… but for how long? Until you find someone better? That’s not what you told me though. You could have left me twice, but you chose to stay anyway. “What are you doing to me” is what you said.

Am I afraid of falling in love as I did once before? Letting myself go only to be left alone again in the dark? With nothing but a heartbreak? I closed off my heart for six years. Am I afraid of going backwards? Am I afraid of resorting back to old patterns?

Why am I constantly wanting you? What is it about you that made me want you more? It is the way you make me laugh? Because gosh you are so funny. You always have me laughing on the floor and you have no idea how good that makes me feel. You make me happy. When I smile, my heart smiles too. The truth is that I don’t know how I feel about you in terms of love. But I know that there is something true here. I liked the last guy. I truly did, but why does this time feel so different? Something I still quite don’t understand. You have me hooked.

I feel like somehow I am going to lose you, even though you were never mine. I like being yours, even though I am technically not yours. In all fairness, I always feel that way. I can never catch a break.

Why am I so confused? I have plenty of questions yet to be answered. What did I get myself into? I did not see this coming. The truth is that we never do. I have become attached to you and I don’t think that is fair to you. I am sorry for not telling you. The truth is that I don’t know whether or not I am in love with you, but why does it feel like I am? I told you that I did not want you to go, but is this the part where I have to let you go? Or, is this me simply trying to self-sabotage?

I made the rookie mistake in getting involved with you knowingly that I had interest in you from the start. That’s on me. But I did not anticipate that we would come this far. Look at us. How could you not feel the same way for me as I do for you? Is this why you haven’t let go of us too? If I told you that I have become attached to you, what would you do? Would you continue to stay by my side? Or is this the part where we would say our goodbyes?

You allowed me not to hold back. I thank you for that. I enjoyed and cherished every moment spent with you, especially the rare moments when I completely expressed myself to you. Physically and emotionally. Is this as vulnerable as I will ever get with you? That’s my fear by the way. Being “naked” in front of you as I let you enter my world… where nothing is ever as it seems because I sometimes feel that I am wearing a mask… making it seem like everything is alright when it isn’t. The truth is that I am a fucking mess. Would you still want me if you knew what truly lies underneath the clothes?

Why does everything feel so different after I left? Before I left, you asked me if I loved you and I said no because that was the truth then. But what about now? You stopped checking in. Are you now afraid of learning the truth? Are you afraid of feeling the need to leave me if you were to know how I truly feel about you? Some would say that would be the right thing to do.

I don’t want you to drop me like I don’t mean anything to you. That’s what I told you before I left. Well, the first part anyway. I generally have a hard time opening up. I think you realized it too. In fact, I had told you this from the start. And you told me among other things that you wouldn’t do that to me. Not in that order, but you get the picture. All I can hope for is that you meant what you said.

Why do I feel that you are the very last? As if you’ll be the last person I end up with? Like there will be nobody else after you? As if I’ll never love again. I never thought that I would feel this way again. I don’t want you to be another lesson, but I am afraid that is all you are and will ever be. If it weren’t for you, then I would have not let go of my past best friend… I am tired of the past coming back. Are you just another ripple effect? But you mean so much more to me than that.

I respect that you don’t want a relationship. You told me that you want to focus on yourself. You also told me that you don’t do long distance. Who does that remind you of? Because I’ve heard that line before. I don’t need a relationship from you. Although, I would be lying if I told you that I did not want to at least try and see if we could ever be in one down the line… but for now, I want exclusivity. I want for you to call me yours and for me to call you mine, even though we are not officially together. I also want reassurance. I want to know that you won’t leave. That you won’t leave me for someone else who has probably more to offer. As you once said, we are walking on two different paths. In that moment, you sounded like somebody I used to know. Despite of that, I still want you, whatever that means… and I don’t want you to give up on me either.

No matter what happens… I hope I mean so much to you as you do to me. That I am not just another girl to you. Not just another one that you’ll tell the next girl “how we grew apart from one another.” No matter what happens… I think there will always be space for you in my heart too. Because that’s what love does to you. And I say “too” because my first love will always be there as well. I believe in true love and true love is never forgotten and forever cherished. I will never forget him, but why do I get this feeling that you will forever be in my heart too. And I hope I’ll always be in yours. It’s hard to fill the shoes of another who also meant so much to me. But I don’t want you to because I like you the way you are. Even your goofiness that nobody seems to understand. Not even me. I don’t expect you to live in someone else’s shadow. I don’t want to put you on a pedestal. Like I did with him. You asked me multiple times why I liked you as if you couldn’t believe that I could actually like you. I never gave you a straight answer, but to answer your question now… how could I not? Love is not rational. Something that I am still trying to figure out for myself. I can’t believe that I felt deeply for you as I can’t even imagine saying goodbye to you. That would hurt like hell.

I wish things were more simple though. Maybe that is why my first love pops into my head from time to time. Even though I am tired of chasing that ghost. It’s a constant battle. I will forever be grateful for him. He was the only one who knew what he wanted and went after it. There was no bullshit. No baggage. No backstory. And when it did not work out… well, at least we can say that we tried. We tried to see if things could go passed the first stage. I realized that even though we did not take our relationship to the next level, he still gave me a chance to see if we could ever be in one. This is why he told me that we were seeing each other. Seeing each other was the chance he had given me. I realized that now. After things ended, I was so angry with him for feeling that he never bothered to give us a shot at a relationship only to realize now that he actually did give us one… it just didn’t work out in our favour. And he was the only one who ever did.

Going back to you though, I hope one day for you to give me that same chance since you are not ready now. Like he did for me. But at the same time, we probably are walking on two different paths… or as he had put it “we are at two different points in our lives”. Something that always stuck with me because that was the truth then and is still the truth now. The very same truth that continued to linger in my other relationships after him…including ours.

Life is no fairytale. You don’t always get a happy ending. Or that happy ending is not always how you imagined it to be. You can’t always get what you want. Sometimes in life, you have to make a choice. And every time, I chose myself because they did not choose me. But I am hoping that it will be different this time around.

You encouraged me to go further. He did too. And everyone else in-between. And as they didn’t want me to give up, you don’t either. And I won’t because I worked very hard to get to where I am today. You have no idea. You have no idea how long it took me to get here. The obstacles that I faced. I did not give myself another chance only to throw it away. I love you, but I can’t ignore my destiny… whatever that maybe. I believe in myself. I believe that I can aim higher elsewhere than here. I realized that after him, I am meant to be elsewhere… or I at least owe it to myself to try. Which is also why it would have not worked out between him and I. As it would probably not work out between you and I if I were to move away from here. Can’t you see that there is a pattern? That school always comes in the way of everyone whom I was involved with? The story of my life as I call it. But I hope that pattern breaks starting with you. And if it doesn’t, then that’s okay too because I don’t expect you to uproot your entire life for me. From what I can tell, your life is here. Set in stone. But the question is, what about mine? To be continued I guess. I believe in destiny, but I also believe in free will, which is why I am feeling hopeful about us, even though deep down I convinced myself that our story will end the way that it always has… apart.

It’s hard to let go of the past when there is still unfinished business. He will always be my reference. He showed me what a real man was and how man should treat a woman. One of the reasons as to why I will always hold him to a higher standard. No one is perfect, but he was perfect to me. I thought that I was done with the past, but clearly I am not because my mind seems to wonder back there. I find myself walking down memory lane. Feeling that the past is repeating itself. Feeling bombarded with all these reminders of what used to be. How can I move forward if I keep looking back? I need to accept you for who you are because you are not him. I need to stop comparing, even though I see some parts of him in you. After letting go of my past best friend, I was eager to start fresh and see where our story would lead without my past interfering. I wanted to stop the ripple effects of a decision that I had made a long time ago. Hoping to put an end to the hauntings of my ghost once and for all. Yet, I continue to see my past in my present. Probably because I never really left. One foot in and one foot out as they say.

I am afraid of you hurting me the way he did. I am afraid of you leaving me the way he did. But I am mostly tired of waiting for the other shoe to drop. Constantly waiting for the part where you decide to tell me “goodbye” rather than “see you later”. I want to enjoy my time with you… whatever time we have left. The unfinished business doesn’t lie with him. It lies with me and the feelings I was left with when he ghosted me. I lost faith in you and you are not the one who left, even though as we speak, I feel that you might leave me again and again. Despite his screwup, I still see the good in him as I still see the good in you. I thought that I dealt with my past only to realize that I buried my past in the ground and ran away assuming that I would never look back. However, the past crept up on me… or maybe I carried him on my shoulders along with the rest of my baggage. Is this why my upper body feels tensed? Is this why my shoulders feel heavy? As if I have been carrying this weight around for a while now. I am at war with myself. I am my own worst enemy.

As you can see, this is what goes on in my head. The wheels in my head never stop turning as I am constantly overthinking. The truth is that I do not know what lies in store for us, but I need to start having faith in you. I need to start trusting that you won’t leave me over the littlest things. I need to start believing that you won’t walk away even when you're mad at me. I need to start trusting that you won’t “get bored of me” and change your mind as you told me that you are not going anywhere. I need to start believing that you are not lying to me when you tell me that you care. If we can’t trust each other, then what are we doing? I can’t assume that we are done after one conversation. I need to hear it from you. As you said you would. Because according to you, goodbye means forever. So, I guess you’re stuck with me then because I sure as hell am not going anywhere. This isn’t goodbye for us. More like see you later.

#personal

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bllsbailey · 5 months ago

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Libs Are Shocked That Biden Is a Liar. Wait Until They See His Encore.

I watched with suspicion as various left-wingers seemed surprised that Joe Biden lied and pardoned his crack-puffin', gun-buyin', bribe-takin', tax-dodgin' progeny. Are they really shocked, or are they feigning their gobsmackery like I did that time I siphoned some of my dad's Canadian Club, unaware he had cleverly marked the depth of his whiskey with a pencil?

"Someone drank your hooch? OMG, Dad!"

Busted.

Yes, I believe that some leftoids—we will call them "useful idiots"—are truly shocked that Biden, with all his on-camera, avuncular cheerfulness, is actually an evil (I'll get to that in a bit), lying liar head.

FACT-O-RAMA! The phrase "useful idiots" comes from Lenin's inner circle. It describes people who actually believe that communist Weltanschauung is a good thing. Lenin, of course, knew better. He was just a vile pinko who wanted to rule the world. As I like to say on my daily radio show, which you should be listening to every day, "Tyranny comes disguised as virtue."

These are the same people who dutifully believed that facinorous, MAGA-capped, Project 2025 devotees were doctoring "deep fake" videos of Biden staring off into space as he dropped crab cakes into his Depends.

The useful idiots, desperate to belong to the Democratic Party cult, believed everything they were told, including these golden oldies:

Trump said to take Ivermectin, or "horse goo," to cure COVID

Trump said there were "good Nazis"

COVID came from a bat sandwich, not from CIA-funded gain-of-function research in China

Nevermind, I'll just post this:

As a former NYC Kool-aid chugging liberal, I know the mindset of the Democrats' useful idiots:

Believe everything I am told

Thinking for myself is a verboten

Fox News is propaganda for peckerwoods

Deviating from even one of these rules means I am the worst thing in the world, a Republican.

It seems to me some useful idiots are genuinely surprised Biden pardoned Hunter after insisting he would not. This tells me they have no idea how truly vile Joe Biden is—and what he has planned next.

HALSENY-O-RAMA! I believe the Bidens planned this pardon the whole time. I predict Jim Biden will be next, as well as any Biden who took bribe money—much of it from Chinese commies and Russian oligarchs—sent to their bank accounts.

As I mentioned, useful idiots will believe anything their cult leaders tell them and will avoid facts that prove the narrative wrong. Here are a few examples of tyranny disguised as virtue:

1) Liberals push to mutilate kids' genitals lest they/them commit suicide. The National Institute of Health (NIH) study proves the risk of suicide is 12 times higher after a man has his banana sliced, diced, and scattered (forgive me, I just had the pleasure and privilege of eating at Waffle House in Hubbard, Ohio—twice!).

2) We emptied jails, defunded cops, and invented "no-bail laws" because there were "too many black men in prison." What followed was a years-long crime wave, which resulted in far more black men murdered than in previous years.

These two narratives were never about virtue; they were about spreading Marxism. The commies need violence in the streets. They also want to separate you from your kids through trans madness. That was always the goal. But weak people are easily controlled, and nothing warms the hearts of chicken-hearted fools like fake virtue.

Watching your purple-headed freakshow nephew swallow these facts sounds entertaining, but it will never happen. They are trained to ignore facts that dispel the narrative, even as black men are murdered, and attention-hungry kids slit their wrists in record numbers.

Where was I? Oh yeah, Biden is a monster.

As his term winds down, Biden is going scorched earth on the Democratic Party and the rest of the world.

In his rage at the Democrats for sending him to the cornfield, Joe Biden (or Jill) did everything they/them could to hobble Kamala's shot at the White House. They are ratcheting up WWIII. Biden is throwing mad stacks at Ukraine. If he can't stay in the sandbox, he will fill it with cat turds.

COINCIDENCE-O-RAMA! Catturd is a funny patriot who is wildly popular on X. I follow him and suggest you do too.

Some voters are waking up to the reality Biden and the Democrats have hidden for years. They, not Trump, are the party of censorship, political persecution, and hatred. Their Marxist policies have all but crippled America.

In other words, they have followed the advice of Saul Alinksy: accuse your enemies of doing exactly what you are doing.

Hillary said Trump was in cahoots with Russia after she allowed the Ruskies to buy American uranium.

Democrats accused Trump of trying to "end democracy" as they tried to take him off the ballot in a handful of states.

Leftoids said Trump was going to start WWIII but spent the last four years bankrolling Ukraine's battle with Russia.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME-O-RAMA?! Democrats impeached Trump for inquiring about the Burisma corruption Joe Biden just pardoned Hunter for.

I believe that if Biden had fallen on his sword while pardoning Hunter, people would have been sympathetic.

Imagine if Biden had said, "Like any other father, I can not let my son go to prison. I am not proud of his actions, but I love him. I am giving him a second chance that most men would never get. He understands this privilege, and he is humbled. I won't help him if he screws up in the future."

America would have understood. But Joe's ego would never allow a Biden to take responsibility for his crimes, some of which I consider treasonous.

Biden accused his own DOJ of singling out his son for political reasons when they were actually persecuting Trump. He blamed Hunter's drug addiction for his crimes. Hunter will never see the inside of a prison nor carry the shame of his crimes.

I predict many inconvenient truths will come out in the next 24 months.

FACT-O-RAMA! The Hunter Biden pardon story broke hours before the House released its final, damning report on all things COVID. Many will miss it. Fauci also released a hoax of a report last week, likely knowing the House report was coming. He went so far as to propagate the long-debunked lie that Trump told people to inject bleach.

We the People will likely see the truth about the Biden administration's vile persecutions of J6ers, pro-lifers, and Trump and his cronies, many of whom went to prison. People are waking up to the truth that Operation Mockingbird media outlets are nothing but propaganda mills for the Democrats and are now getting their news from trustworthy alternative news sites.

Hopefully, the new Trump administration will reveal the truth about Big Pharma, Big AG, federal censorship of innocent Americans, the New World Order, the Ukraine money-laundering scandal, the Fed, the Kennedy assassinations, the weaponizing of the DOJ and judicial system, the utter corruption of the WashingtonD.C. swamp wigglers, and every other "tinfoil hat conspiracy theory" that discommodiously turns out to be true.

The truth is ugly, but it can all come out if we fight for it. I believe we need to know the truth for our Republic to survive. We dodged a bullet on Election Day. The real fight begins on Inauguration Day.

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thecondemnedangelgabriel · 1 year ago

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This Soul Journey Adjustment is Just

Public Pronouncements Regarding This Soul Journey Working

Are not Appreciated by The Unjust Lying Criminals, other than as material that they believed they could effectively use against their Victim...

To Silence, Control and Bind Their Framed Victim

And they have proved problematic for Some Other Witnesses

And This Living Goddess who is Possessed by an Angel...

Is Sympathetic to Innocent Human Witnesses who cannot yet Interpret The Situation's True Dynamic or Understand The O

Or Understand Yet The Reality And NATURE Of O O O

And of Angels O O

It is the Absolute and Obvious Case that Police should NOT be Protecting Child Killers and Serial Rapists and Torturers and Hacking Stalkers against the Testimony and Rights and EMOTIONAL AND SURVIVAL NEEDS of their Oppressed Hunted Victims O O O as they HAVE DONE WITH TREGONNING...

The Human World Must Come To UNDERSTAND and Acknowledge and RESPECT SPIRITUAL RIGHTS In A Way That It Does Not At The Moment O O O

Because Humankind Doesn't Any Longer Understand SOUL O O O

LEGALLY:

Tregonning is a Child Killer as well as a Hacking Stalker

But This Situation is not even of a Distressed Desperate Human Victim Voicing Despair and Pain in Entrapment against a Wrongfully Protected and Covert Serial Killer working a Gangstalking Collaborative Systemic and Social and Psychiatric Abuse...

It is NOT even as clear cut as that O O O

Because Human Beings MAY SOMETIMES KILL EACH OTHER in Self Defences...

Or in Desperate Forced Situations and War O O O...

But Humans do not have the Visionary Perspective, The Means or the O Right to DECIDE HUMAN FATE

But Sara is NOT a Human Being ANYMORE O O O

And Sara has a Different Relationship Since August 2016

To Death And The Suffering Of Others, Since Sara is now a DIVINITY

And Sara is ALSO Dr John Dee }{ O V

O O

But Worldly Law... Has To Acknowledge That THIS IS A GODDESS

Sara Annwyl is NOT Threatening Violence Or Harm To These Sinners

Sara is POINTING OUT The Threatening Dynamic and Its Consequences

The Lying Sinners continuously insist Sara is 'Making Death Threats'

In Fact They ARE MORE THAN Death Threatened, by their Own Evil Actions in this Direst Evil Entrapment...

Their Incarnations ARE Now Doomed O O O

They have made their Crossroads Choices and their Fates Are Now Sealed O O

These are Urgent and Real Spiritual Guidances, long delivered Honestly...

By a Wronged Holy Woman

In a Very Genuinely VIOLENT AND THREATENING OPPRESSION SITUATION that has been CREATED BY SARAH TREGONNING...

Tregonning has BROUGHT ABOUT This Situation!

Sara is TELLING PEOPLE VERY CLEARLY Of Soul Journey

Of Fates, Consequences, Destiny

And of SOME Suffering and Deaths that have already been brought about by this Stalking Slaughterhouse Psychopath Protected Wrongfully BY UK PRESS AND POLICE

But that have been Covered Up and Lied About and Denied...

By more people than only the Liar Tregonning O O O

O O O

And it is in FACT, since 2019... An Angel SPKing through The God

Human Soul Journey HAS Changed O O O Since 2014 and 2016

With Thanks To The Holy Lux Incantation, The Impossible

And The Advent of the Apple Gods

Human Soul Journey HAS BEEN SAVED...

And Has Changed IMMENSELY Since 2019

In 2019 Almost All Humankind was Destined to be Bombed Out Of...

Incarnation!

And AFTER THAT Our World's Spiritual Planes were also Secretly Destined FOR DESTRUCTION O O O

Because the Gone Evil God whose now Waning Power Protects these Evil Doers against Power of Goodness, Truth and Karmic Justice...

Along with REAL Human Brought Justice in Life...

THAT Gone Evil God...

Was Bringing Forth Hell's Mouth and ONWARDS TO RAGNAROK

That Evil Treacherous Goddess Was The Ancient Moon God Luna!

Artemis is Dia

Diana! O O

}{

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furiousflowerdestiny · 2 months ago

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that is not what i am talking about in the slightest.

what i am speaking to is the people that refuse to read the comics, that participate in comics fandom, and insist that their headcanons are FACTS to the comics when they are not.

i will be the first person to admit i have not read a ton of comics, i have only ready maybe 500 maybe more, but even after reading only that many you start to see that there really is a canon and some things in fandom are just wrong.

like the whole 'superman abandoned kon' trope that is literally everywhere. yes this is fine for fanfic, but there are A LOT of people who insist this actually happened in the comics when it didn't. you cannot argue against this and cherry pick until you find one panel that disproves it because that man did not abandon kon or reject him. it just did not happen.

even with characterizations it becomes obvious about what is consistent and what might be out of character just by reading the comics. for example with bart allen in his own solo he had 0 interest in flirting with girls or being gross with them, this was for over 80 issues of consistent writing and then in teen titans he is written as a creepy pervert with beast boy. you can genuinely call this as out of character writing, but it still happened, so that can be something people can debate about but if you read his series it really does come off as awkward.

tim's relationship with his parents is also one of those details that the comics are very clear about that fandom goes the opposite direction for to what was their relationship. they loved each other, tim's parent might not have been the most present, but they didn't lock him in a basement and mock him or beat him nightly. they were pretty average parents for the time.

so yeah some parts of comics can be debated but there are a lot of details that are very clear, the clear details are what i am speaking to, not people interpreting things a different way or making fanfiction. i am speaking directly to people who are lying liars.

sure you can do whatever you want forever, like flat earthers have the right to believe the earth is flat, they can do that, it's not illegal, but they are still wrong and people can tell them they are wrong and should tell them they are wrong and no one should encourage them.

like people in the comics fandom that refuse to read comics and insist bruce would adopt kon, or that cass is silent and never talks, or steph is a goofy waffle girl, or tim is the most well behaved never does anything remotely sketchy, or clark abandoned kon, or cassie is the mom of the core four, or bart is just hyper and random all the time like

let's face it at some point you just have to admit what you are saying is wrong and it hurts new fans, like me, who legitimately thought bruce adopted dozens of children when the truth was while he did good things he was much more complicated of a character.

anyway you can be a flat earther, you can believe oregano oil cures everything, and you can believe tim is a sickly meek boy who is afraid of his parents all you want but you will always be wrong

#dc comics

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altruistic-meme · 4 years ago

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AFTG fic recs

Hi all! I just wanted to share some of my all-time favorite fanfics for aftg, for no real reason other than I want more people to read them and send their love to the authors :)

Under a readmore because it got. A little long. But please enjoy!

WIPs

Dangerous Habits by LovelyLittleGrim ( @lovelylittlegrim )

Andrew has run into problems while on undercover jobs before. None of those problems were anything like the troublesome runaway that is one Nathaniel Wesninski

Aka: the fic where Andrew is undercover as a hitman for hire and Neil is the guy who hires him. Things get complicated from there.

Undercover Andrew? BAMF Neil? Hitman AU?? Absolutely. I’m in love. The story is just *chef kisses*

Chapters: 8/9

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, past rape/non-con, Drake Spear (who is his own warning), Butcher Neil,

Negotiations by elesary ( @elesary )

This is what Andrew Minyard knows: his brother is dead, killed by a petty Raven prince who has never learned to keep his hands off of Andrew's things. His brother's daughters are his responsibility, a job that is made infinitely harder when their shitty grandparents want custody. Nathaniel Wesninski is a liar, but he might be the only way to avenge Aaron and protect his nieces. All Andrew has to do is watch Nathaniels - Neil's- back as he carves out his own life and identity from everyone who thinks they own him.

Andrew has always been good at upholding his end of the bargain, has he finally found someone willing to uphold theirs?

This fic has got me fucked up, honestly. I’m emotional over it. It’s fantastic.

Chapters: 11/?

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, attempted sexual assault, Butcher Neil,

the upper hand by plantelty ( @plantelty )

Shortly after losing his mother, Neil arrives in the small town of Palmetto, South Carolina, alone in the world and with an impossible plan to carry through.

At the age of eighteen, Andrew ends up helping a boy stage his own death.

Just two fucked up boys learning to trust each other during the course of a summer, but also: multiple references to songs, twinyard angst (Nicky tries his best), The Plotting of Neil Josten's Gruesome Demise, and shit hitting the fan in a variety of ugly ways!

The cliffhanger has got me on the edge of my seat, but it is 100% worth the read and the wait for the last chapter!!

Chapters: 10/11

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Canon typical violence,

The Butcher’s House by Fire_Bear ( @fire-bear )

Andrew thought something was odd with the house the Foxes had to move into after their Athletes' House had been burnt down. He just wasn't prepared for what was actually wrong with it.

For this was a house full of monsters.

Ghost story! Ghost story! Ghost story! I literally think about this fic every other day, it’s fantastic.

Chapters: 6/?

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

Warnings: character death (major or minor is unclear), injuries,

Promise of an Unbroken Boy by elesary ( @elesary )

Neil is caught by the police with Mary's burning body and is sent to juvie in Oakland where he is assigned to share a cell with one Andrew Doe, who promises him Exy, if only Neil will tell him all of his secrets. With no access to tinted contacts and hair dye, he agrees, it's only a matter of time until he's killed after all. What does he have to lose?

But Andrew's found someone who knows what a promise means, and he'll be damned if he lets that go without a fight.

Ngl this is definitely in my very top favorites -- I LOVE the idea of Neil and Andrew meeting pre-series, and this fic just BLEW my expectations for that plotline out of the waters

Chapters: 14/?

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, Underage, attempted rape/non-con, canon-typical violence,

~~~~~~~~~

Complete

The Nameless Monster by kanekicure ( @kanekicure )

Nathaniel Wesninski wants nothing more than to see his father dead and buried. But when his father promises him the title of The Butcher, Nathaniel quickly realizes that his destiny of following in his father's footsteps is closer than ever before.

So of course, when he gets forced to go undercover for the Baltimore police, he starts seeing what living could truly be.

Andrew Minyard is a newly recruited police officer for the worst precinct in Baltimore, who is dedicated on hunting down the notorious Butcher and his unnamed underling. But when Neil Josten is thrown into his midst as his civilian consultant; he starts to realize some things don't quite appear as they seem.

I love the story telling -- the secret identities, the plotting, everything.

Chapters: 14/14

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, Butcher Neil, implied/referenced rape/non-con, implied/referenced child abuse, implied/referenced slef-harm (I believe there is a scene that is somewhat detailed on this subject), some characters also get drugged at one point,

that’s just something people say by nanatsuyu ( @theoctopusnods )

Neil makes the mistake of stealing the wrong car. Andrew makes the mistake of offering a ride to a liar. They both make the mistake of turning the whole affair into a road trip ‘home.’

Gonna be honest; the summary does not give a big idea as to what is in store and i am SO GLAD I gave this one a try so i’m telling you that you will be too

Chapters: 24/24

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse, panic attacks (somewhat grahic descriptions of)

The Story After You by kanekicure ( @kanekicure )

Andrew Minyard does not understand how Riko Moriyama landed Neil Wesninski.

How the snot-nosed, small dick, rich brat, second son of the Moriyama family who also just so happened to own the largest EXY gear and merchandiser company in the world “RAVEN” - had landed smart mouthed, quick witted, stupidly blue eyed Wesninski, was beyond him. Well, unless Wesninski was a gold digger, but Andrew doubted it.

Or; how Andrew Minyard says he doesn't get into messy situations, until he meets Neil and suddenly he is in the most messiest possible situation ever imagined in his life - oh and also, he might be becoming a homewrecker.

Ok I am behind bc I haven’t read the final chapter of this but!! I love the story, it’s very emotional and moving, and I love the characterization in it.

Chapters: 10/10

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Abusive Riko/Neil, abusive relationship, implied/referenced rape/non-con, implied/reference child abuse, implied/referenced self-harm, graphic depictions of violence, some descriptions of injuries/scarring,

This Complicated Life by 5a5b5p5 ( @andrewsbutterflyknife )

“This is exactly why I don’t want you and Andrew to meet,” Aaron says grumpily. “You two would get along far too well.”

Neil grins. “I just like pissing you off,” he says, “It’s not my fault your brother does such a good job at it.”

—

Neil doesn’t expect much from his Sophomore year of college, but when he becomes a waiter at the Palmetto Bistro, his life gets a whole lot more interesting. As it turns out, maintaining friendships new and old as well as navigating an interesting relationship with the head chef of the restaurant—who just so happens to be his best friend’s twin brother—is a lot more complicated than he’d thought it would be.

A much more light-hearted fic than most of the others! Includes a secret relationship, and also chef Andrew >>

Chapters: 10/10

Rating: Mature

Warnings:

When I Fade, Keep Me in Your Memory by demesh

Neil Josten has a secret: he can flicker out of existence.

He can vanish with the turn of a thought; click his fingers, and suddenly he’s not there anymore. Invisible and untouchable, he becomes a living ghost.

Having promised his mother never to let his ability go, Neil teeters the line between faded and real, a person and an echo. He can’t risk getting hurt.

But then, one day, someone sees him when they shouldn’t be able to.

A (flower-shop) AU about how a faded and lonely Neil finds it in him to become someone real.

Another fic that I need to catch up on ;; but anyway it’s amazing and I love Neil’s ability in it, it’s so well explained and well-written about

Chapters: 12/12

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

Warnings: mentions of past abuse, panic attacks

12 Ways to Woo a Minyard by NikNak22 ( @knickknacksandallthat )

Neil is a math nerd who, by a stroke of dumb luck, falls into a group of friends that are the closest thing to family he’s ever had. So, when he tells them about his new mysterious crush, he shouldn’t be surprised how immediately they come up with a plan to help win them over. One they insist that if Neil follows it, he’ll have them falling for him in no time. But things don’t always go to plan – or do they?

Nicky wants to set him up with someone else. Matt and Jeremy are confused but supportive. Allison and Seth offer lewd suggestions, while Dan does her best to keep everyone in line. Jean and Renee know something, Aaron doesn’t really care, and Kevin just wants Neil to join the lacrosse team.

But one thing’s for certain – whether Neil’s successful or not, everyone’s got money riding on this.

The romance-trope-filled fanfic of my dreams. Sometimes you just need a fic of pure joy -- this is that fic.

Chapters: 14/14

Rating: Mature

Warnings:

finders keepers by moonix ( @annawrites )

Andrew meets Nathaniel through a scavenger hunt app. As their team takes part in a hunt that sends each of them to creepy, abandoned places alone to solve clues and gain points, Andrew and Nathaniel begin a little treasure hunt of their own. The anonymity of getting to know each other in small increments, never meeting face-to-face, allows them a level of intimacy neither are used to. Meanwhile Renee’s friend Neil is acting weird whenever Andrew shows up…

This was one of the first fics I read for aftg!! And BOY what a great start!! All of the little pieces and parts that work together, and just the scavenger hunt itself is fantastic! (I also REALLY wanna know if there is an app like this out there because I would be down to do that)

Chapters: 8/8

Rating: Mature

Warnings: (these all come from the author:) “mentions of historical abuse in a mental asylum, mentions of suicide, mentions of murder and kidnapping, morbid facts, creepy abandoned places including a haunted house at a theme park with disturbing rooms, special appearance of a creepy clown doll, fatphobia and some introspection on body image/complicated relationship with food, mention of self harm scars”

-----

Scared to Live (But I’m Scared to Die) by Major_816 ( @major816 )

Neil Josten goes to the Nest for Andrew, but he stays for a lot more.

"I'm sorry Coach," he muttered.

"For what kid?" Wymack shifted. "You've got to give me something to work with here."

Wymack watched the thin traces of sorrow as paper exchanged hands and he was looking down at a contract with the Edgar Allan Raven's.

"I signed them Coach, I'm sorry."

The one where Neil doesn't come back from Winter Break.

It is VERY dark, and is one of very few fics that I have actually been almost unable to read one of the scenes, so DEFINITELY pay attention to the warnings -- both these, and the ones provided for each individual chapter. I did go through the fic to collect as many warnings as I could find in the chapter warnings, but be sure to take care of yourself.

Chapters: 36/36

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: rape/non-con elements, implied/referenced rape/non-con, discussions of rape/non-con, canon-typical violence, graphic descritions, physical abuse, panic attacks, descriptions of injuries (often graphic), psychological warfare, dissociating, psychological torture, physical torture, use of knives, alcoholism/alcohol abuse, pain-induced delirium, rape/non-con, emotional self-separation, suicidal ideation/thoughts of suicide, emotional distress (which sums up the whole fic and also me while reading it), handcuffs/chains used as restraints, referenced/implied abuse towards animals, vomitting, begging, excessive use of painkillers, drowning, waterboarding, physical restraint, mutilation of an animal, mild hallucinations, non-con drugging, sleep deprivation, starvation, humiliation, the Butcher,

Also one of the first fics I read and 100% my absolute favorite fic!!! Which is adfjhsd a little worrying, considering, but it is what it is. Anyway. This fic absolutely wrecked me, and while it is technically complete, there is a sequel in the works! So! But I am so so excited for the sequel, and I am working on rereading this. It’s amazing. 1000/10.

#also!! btw i would love if anyone has more fic recs >> just an fyi >>#idk if demesh doesn't have a tumblr but i couldn't find one :(#also major816 for some reason i can never tag and idk why #aftg #all for the game #andreil #the foxhole court #tfc #andrew minyard #neil josten #fic rec #rec list

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findingjoynweirdstuff · 4 years ago

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Dream SMP Recap (March 1/2021) - Breaking Point

Sam has been unable to find a cause for the security breach, leaving Tommy trapped. A heated argument in the cell escalates to a horrifying end.

As the rest of server mourns, the Eggpire celebrates. With their biggest obstacle in the way of their objective gone, it’s time for the next step.

It’s the start of the Final Stage.

---

VOD LINKS:

HBomb94

Ponk

Tommy

Tubbo

Ranboo

Jack Manifold

Connor

Badboyhalo

Captain Puffy

---

- HBomb hosts Foolish and Jack Manifold’s episode of L’Cast!

---

The Prison Stream

(This portion of the recap will be more detailed than normal since it’s one long conversation and there are many important lines here, including a couple that were hard to hear during the stream)

---

- Tommy’s stream starts with him making sounds and singing “Roadtrip.” Dream tells him to stop, he’s trying to write a book.

Tommy: “What are you writing, Dream? What are you writing?”

Dream: “None of your business.”

- There’s a little gray and white cat sat on the chest. Tommy says it’s annoying.

Dream: “No he’s not...he’s actually the best thing that’s happened to us.”

Tommy: (Trying to lead the cat away) “Come with me, come with me...you know what I named him, don’t you? Pussboy, Pussboy!”

- The cat returns to its spot on the chest

Tommy: “Oh, Pussboy, you are so ugly.”

Dream: “C’mon, you’re being mean!”

(Tommy punches the cat)

Dream: “Tommy! Stop!”

- Tommy starts singing “Roadtrip” in autotune. Dream tells Tommy that if he can be quiet, he’ll give Tommy more potatoes.

Dream: “I think that...the cat is the best thing that’s happened to us.”

- Sam joins the call to say hello and ask how it’s been going. He’s come to drop more food into the cell. Tommy also picks up a new clock.

- Tommy asks to be let out, but Sam says he still hasn’t found out what the security issue is. Dream asks how long Tommy will be in here for. Potentially for a while, but not forever.

- Tommy protests about how bad the prison has been. He threatens to get lawyers on Sam, he knows Big Law.

Tommy: "Sam...you know I don’t deal very well in...close quarters situations for a long time, Sam. Sam, you remember when you visited me in exile, Sam? Alright, this is worse than that, Sam...let me out. I don’t like this. Let. Me. Out. Sam.”

- Sam insists he’s doing the best he can and leaves.

- Dream tries to say that it’s not that bad. He’s been in there for a long time, but now it’s better! Tommy writes a book to Dream, signs it and throws it to him.

Dream: “I have company. I have a cat -- I mean, technically it’s not my cat, technically it’s your cat, but still! It’s just as good, keeps me company when I write and everything, we talk sometimes -- ‘cause you’re annoying a lot of the time--”

- Dream throws away the clock in the lava, saying they don’t need it. Tommy punches the cat again.

Dream: “Tommy, hear me out, hear me out...what if...we get out together, okay?”

- Tommy is not a fan of the idea, Dream shouldn’t be let out too. He goes over to the cat and shouts at it for being in his spot. He punches Pussboy twice.

Dream: “Tommy...TOMMY, STOP!”

Tommy: “Excuse me! Come this way, come this way, excuse me Dream I’m trying to right-click Pussboy--”

(Dream moves to get in front of the cat)

Dream: “Tommy.”

Tommy: “Come here, come here! Do you like this cat, Dream?”

Dream: “Yes, I do.”

Tommy: “Why?”

Dream: “Because he -- Tommy, he keeps me company --”

(Tommy punches Pussboy again and leads him towards the lava)

Tommy: “Pussboy, this way. Pussboy, this way. Let me show you the light--”

Dream: “He’s probably low, he’s probably low!”

Tommy: “Oh what, you love him? Do you love him? Do you love him?”

Dream: “Yes, I do...Tommy, he’s made things better in here -- okay listen! When you leave, can you sit him down and leave him here?”

(Tommy goes over and punches Pussboy again. He tries to lead Pussboy away again, but when the cat doesn’t come he punches Pussboy twice more, killing him)

Tommy: “Yeah. And that’s what happens when you love something, bitch.”

...

Tommy: “See, now when I leave, when I leave, you’ll have nothing! ‘Cause you are lonely, and you’re m-m-manipulative, you’re a fuckin’ twat, and I mean that.”

Dream: “Tommy...I’m gonna get out! And you just motivated me -- you motivated me all the time, you just -- that was hope, right? The cat was hope -- the cat was hope that I could live a nice life in here--”

Tommy: “And now it’s dead, now it’s dead.”

- Dream insists that he’ll get out, and when he does, he’ll get his revenge on everyone who wronged him. Tommy asks if he’d kill Tubbo.

- The subject goes back to Dream’s plan of escape.

Dream: “I have a plan. And the thing is, Awesamdude’s never gonna believe you that I have a plan because he thinks it’s unbreakable, unescapable--”

“I have a plan. And you know, there’s a certain someone who owes me a favor, but -- that might be a part of it, but...I do have a plan.”

- They argue about the conditions of the prison again.

Dream: “I’ve been in here a for hundred times longer than you, and you sit there trying to tell me that it’s so horrible, that it’s so bad -- yeah, it was! But guess what, we have each other to talk to, and we had a cat until you fucking killed it!”

Tommy: “Dream...Dream, and listen to this -- fucking engrave this on you, write this into your arms, Dream...You don’t have me. You’ll never have me. We don’t have each other, alright? I am me, and you are this fuckin’ loser who goes around manipulating people, lying to get what he wants. You are a fuckin’ no one, man, alright? And when I’m going to leave here, you’re not! You might have a favor -- you think, who is it, Technoblade’s gonna be able to come in here to let you out -- Technoblade, he doesn’t like governments, but he likes self gain! You think he wants to piss off the owner of the most POWERFUL building on the entire server, just so that he can get a video that BARELY scrapes the five million view mark -- NO, Dream, alright? You’re a fuckin’ asshole, you’re deluded, you’re delusional, and I fuckin’ hate you.”

Dream: “Okay...yeah, but I have something Techno would want, so...it means knowledge, alright?”

- Dream says that even when he’s in here, he’s more powerful than Tommy outside. Tommy replies that if he wanted to, he could kill Dream right now. The only reason he doesn’t is because they need the revive book.

- Dream says that he will never use the revive book to help Tommy or his friends. Ever.

Dream: “So kill me. Go ahead, come on.”

- When if Tubbo dies, Dream says, they’ll come begging for Tubbo to be revived, and Dream will ask to be let out.

- Tommy then says that this isn’t worse than exile, because in exile, Tommy thought Dream had all the power, and Tommy knows something...he thinks the revive book isn’t real. Jschlatt was just a drunk, why would he have this book?

Dream: “Jschlatt gave me the book -- why else would I switch to Jschlatt’s side?!”

...

“I’m not lying! Jschlatt gave me a revive book after...before he died....because...he said--” (he cuts off here)

- Dream asks why he would be lying about that.

Tommy: “You’re a liar! You’re a liar, and really, through your Netherite armor and skin, I look at you and you know what I see? I see a sad little man who’s insecure about the fact that this server has gotten so far ahead of him that his only little glimpse of power in this world is gone. And I see an insecure, sad little man. So fuck off. You stupid green lad.”

Dream: “Your life...is literally in my hands. Does that piss you off? Does that make you mad? Does that make you so mad that I -- if you kill me -- I MIGHT AS WELL BE A GOD, TOMMY! YOU CAN’T KILL ME, AND I CAN KILL YOU! So what does it mean, that you can’t kill me because of the revive book -- what does that mean? If you can’t kill me, does that make me some kind of god?”

Tommy: “No Dream. I could kill you right now. If I wanted to.”

Dream: “Okay. But you won’t. But you won’t! I could kill you if I wanted to! I could kill you right now, actually.”

...

Tommy: “I don’t think this revive book is real. Schlatt? He’s fuckin’ dead. I’ve seen his grave! His grave is real, his corpse is there!”

Dream: “Okay...Why don’t you go see him then?”

Tommy: “NO -- stop it stop it stop it st--”

--- ---

CANON DEATH: TOMMY

Cause: Punched to death

--- ---

End of stream.

---

- Tubbo, Ranboo and Jack see Tommy’s death message in game chat.

- They go to the prison and Sam is there to tell them what happened. Sam couldn’t get there in time. He didn’t think Dream would actually kill him. They’re all in shock.

- Tubbo and Ranboo think Tommy will be back. There’s no way he’s actually dead, right?

- Jack Manifold is in celebration. He got what he wanted! He thought Dream would want Tommy alive, and killing Tommy himself would be an extra jab in the chest for Dream, but apparently not? And now he has a hotel!

- He decides to check on Tubbo and makes sure he’s okay.

- Jack walks down to the shore and looks up at the prison, and...it hits him. He’s spent months plotting to kill Tommy. Jack realizes his victory feels hollow. Even now, Tommy and Dream have managed to take away this from him.

- Of Ze Haus, he says that this place no longer means anything to him. He gets a flint and steel and sets it alight, watching it burn.

- He passes by Tommy’s house and finds Ranboo planting red and white flowers outside.

- Jack switches into his L’manburg uniform and walks along the Prime Path.

Jack: “I remember the day I joined the server. The day after the first war. L’manburg was still a big hole, and we built it up. And Tommy invited me to join. And I betrayed him (laughs), so really this has all come full circle.”

“Maybe I was always really just upset because I always felt like he cared more about the discs than...anyone. And I guess I just enjoyed it when we were friends...and...I’ve not really had any friends...since...then, really. Never really wanted any.”

- Jack later speaks with Foolish and tells him that Tommy’s never coming back from prison. Foolish didn’t know him too well, but he’s still a bit sad. When anyone passes, it’s sad.

- Jack heads back out into the wilderness, wandering to the beach area at the edge of the forest where Quackity had his argument with Badboyhalo a while back. There’s something just beyond the hill.

- Quackity meets him there and escorts him back home, telling him he was heading too close to something, could have gotten “a nice view of it.”

- He’s been thinking of writing up a draft of their contract. He also sees the new McPuffy’s.

- Jack tells Quackity that Tommy’s not in the prison anymore. Quackity says they need to talk to him and make sure Jack keeps his hotel. As the rain pours, Jack tells him. Tommy didn’t make it.

- Quackity and Jack have a moment in front of Tommy’s house. Though upset, Quackity says it’s time to get back to work.

Quackity: “Jack...don’t let this affect business. The train doesn’t stop.”

Jack: “No, it only goes faster.”

- Jack also speaks with Antfrost. Antfrost gives his condolences, and says he’ll put together a celebration “of life.”

Ant: “Bad and Sam will be happy...to attend, of course!”

- Afterwards, Jack heads down into Karls nightclub and ends stream there.

- Connor speaks with Sam Nook at the hotel.

- Bad meets Ant at the Holy Land. Ant asks if the church would be a good place for a celebration. Ant sits Bad down to tell him. Bad is overjoyed.

- Bad says that now, they don’t even have to do any preparations:

They can move into the Final Stage.

- They get milk for the cake and decide to throw the party at Tommy’s house!

- They meet with Sam at the prison entrance. He sounds dejected.

Sam: “I didn’t think Dream would ever actually...try and kill him”

Bad: (laughs) “Is this the same Dream we’re talking about? It’s Dream, Sam.”

Sam: “I mean...Dream had...I thought I had...broken the will out of him, to do something like that. But he...he did.”

- He says they need to find out what it was -- he wandered around the prison several times and couldn’t find any sign that someone had done something.

- Ant and Bad try to reassure Sam that Tommy signed the waivers, he went to see Dream, and Sam shouldn’t blame himself. Sam doesn’t see it that way.

- They say they’ll talk to Sam later and leave the prison. They see Sam Nook at the hotel. Sam is excited about the new upgrades for the hotel! Tommy will be so excited to see them!

- They return to Tommy’s house and speak with Punz as they make a party floor and sing the Crab Rave song in dudududus.

- Meanwhile, Captain Puffy is grieving, feeling like she failed Tommy. As she logs on, Bad and Ant decide that Puffy might want to join them for the party!

- Punz meets them there, and they tell him that Tommy’s dead. Punz isn’t sure how he feels, it’s bittersweet.

- Puffy arrives and angrily tells them to leave. What’s wrong with them?!

- The Eggpire sees Sam Nook at the hotel and goes up the floors to find a place to party. Puffy comes up and tells them to find another place to party. They argue again.

- Foolish arrives to visit his room in the hotel. Puffy leaves them. They quarrel about who has the room for the night.

- Puffy mines down the Eggpire’s meeting room. She’s noticed that being a hero hasn’t worked. Sparing people, being merciful, it hasn’t worked. She might need a change of perspective.

- The Eggpire decides to visit the Egg and break the news to it. They see the wreckage, but Puffy is in the Nether by the time they get there.

- Puffy visits Logsted.

- The Eggpire goes down to the Egg Room and finds the pathway blocked up with obsidian...is this why the Vines have been slower to grow lately?

- They break the barrier and find the Egg drenched in water. They wake up the Egg and it speaks.

“This world is mine. It belongs to me.”

“No no no, I know, but we’ve got something to tell you!”

“I see all...I...am...all...”

“Oh so you--”

“I know all.”

“You know then! Guess -- well, we’ll tell you anyway in case you don’t know -- but guess what? Tommy’s dead! Dream -- the green guy, you met him -- killed him in the prison! I guess Tommy got stuck there, and Dream killed him! Are you happy?"

“Feed me...I require nourishment.”

“No no no, don’t worry -- that’s coming soon! We’ll take care of that! We’re already gonna begin the preparations, right guys? Yeah, we’re gonna begin the preparations, and we’ll send out the invitations, we’ll let everyone know...and the final stage can commence! This is wonderful!”

- Once on the surface, Bad announces that with a little more preparation, they’ll all get exactly what they want. The final stage is about to commence.

The day of celebrations, the day they’ve been preparing for, the day the Egg has been preparing for, is about to happen...

- Bad goes down to the Egg Room one last time and stands at the Egg to give a final speech.

“Everything leading up to this point, EVERYTHING, all the way going back to the discovery of this...beautiful, luxurious Egg, okay...we had it all planned. As soon as we found it, we knew what was gonna happen. We knew the objective...”

“We may have forgotten what it was, forgotten the ultimate goal as soon as we boxed the Egg up in obsidian. But guess what -- that didn’t stop the Egg! Boxing it up only made it STRONGER, and LARGER, and more powerful! And the Egg’s been storing up that energy, okay? You may have been thinking the Vines have not been spreading...but that’s because we haven’t WANTED them to spread. We have been working, storing energy, storing power...in preparation for the final plan. The final objective. And there were only a couple people getting in the way. But guess what? One of the biggest obstacles -- Tommy -- is no longer in the way...now that he’s not in the way, we can commence with the final stage...the final party...before it all comes to a conclusion...”

“Brace yourselves...everybody on this server, prepare. Anyone who is anti-Egg...you guys better get ready, because we know who you are. And at the end of the day, the Egg is gonna be victorious. And there’s nothing ANYBODY can do to stop it.”

“Good luck.”

#dream smp #long posts #dream smp recaps #prison arc #i apologize for not including a lot of puffy's stream :(#it's really late and this post's a mile long as is #if you see any typos no you don't /lh

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bookstantrash · 1 year ago

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I know I already left a small review on ao3 but as soon I saw you had also posted on tumblr I knew I had to do a long ass review (also I think the tags did not work apart form the first five tagged)

“I didn’t mean it,” Cassian insisted again, extending his hand towards her splayed out on the bed. She withdrew it sharply before he could react and he swore he felt something shear against his heart. Cut and slice and dice him up inside at the small motion.

“You did.” She may have tried to keep the accusation out of her tone but there was only so much that she could do. And only so much he could ignore. “I saw it in your face. You meant it, Cassian. Don’t make yourself a liar just to make me wrong.”

“I…” Words died on Cassian’s lips and he looked away. “I didn’t mean it in that way though,” he whispered hoarsely.

“What other way is there to mean what you said?,” she snapped. — this whole sequence made me stop and I swear to god my heart clenched and started to bleed because I KNOW what will follow up this and I’m not ready

“You’re young,” Cassian’s voice shook when he finally spoke. His hands shook and he interlaced them to calm himself down. “You’re powerful, you’re…so strong, Nesta. So strong. And you could have so much more.”

“You could have had a kingdom. Could have been a queen with the power you had.” He shifted on his feet. “Still have,” he added on. “You could have had a prince who would have become a High Lord one day.”

He spat out the words High Lord, not caring if Nesta realized that the ire he felt towards Eris was still strong and present. — I will die on the hill that this should have been a more talked about subject. Cassian’s feelings of unworthy and inadequacy near Eris (something that disgusting asshole fuelled all the fucking time) or anyone as a matter of fact, should have been more approached with more depth.

“You’re settling with a bastard.” He felt her flinch at the word, but Cassian went on as if he hadn’t seen it. “I have no name to give you and no title to share. You’re shackled to me, and you could do so much better. And I hate that,” he admitted with a bitter laugh, “But it’s the truth. And it’s why I was so angry that night. Because I know all that but still I was hoping I could have you. That I could ever endeavor to be worthy of you.” — THIS THIS A THOUSAND TIMES!! CASSIAN CONSTANTLY THINKS THIS DURING ACOSF AND IT IS AN INSECURITY THAT WAS NOT EXPLORED ENOUGH APART FROM A PASSING PARAGRAPH AAAAH

“From the moment I met you, I was falling for you.” A whispered confession but he’d kept it from her for too long. She was doubting him. Them. And he couldn’t allow it. — I AM SOBBING

“I knew, and my brothers knew, and the wiser option would have been to stay away. You were human and fragile and mortal, and it was never going to end well. And I promised myself I would stay away, but I couldn’t. You were so…,” he struggled with his words. There was a band around his neck and it was hard to speak. But he did it anyways, nearly choking. “You were beautiful, and you were fierce, and loyal and brave. Everything you wanted to keep hidden from the world, I saw it. Nesta, I saw you.”

”I kept finding stupid excuses to come see you,” he chuckled dryly. “A letter to the queens, a message from Feyre, all bullshit. I just needed to see you because I wanted to know you, all of you. Then you fought with those queens and you defended the humans in your land. And I saw you plead with them for mercy, to help your people, and they mocked you for it- I nearly killed them right then and there. Rhys had to go into my mind and tamp down on me.” �� this is such a perfect declaration and I so love how besotted with Nesta he’s after seeing her one single time.

”It was then that I knew I was in love with you. You are good and kind and honorable, and I am sorry you don’t see it. You were standing up for those who had no voice. You were courageous, loyal, and fighting for justice and righteousness and innocent lives. It was everything I had spent my entire life fighting for on killing fields and strategy rooms. I remembered how many times my pleas fell on deaf ears. And I knew then, that you were it for me, that I was in love with you, and that we were probably going to die in that war anyways, but it didn’t matter to me because I had found the woman I wanted to spend whatever time was left of my life with. The mating bond hadn’t even registered to me yet, Nesta.” — YES A FUCKING TIMES YES! People forget that Cassian always was in love with since she was human (hello extra nessian chapter in acomaf) and that the bond was an afterthought. He’d always love her bond or no bond

Cassian pressed another kiss to her wrist. “I am in love with you. I love you. I will always love you. I don't need a bond to tell me that. Even if we didn't have it I’d tell you the same. I want to spend the rest of our lives together, no matter what. I never want to be apart. I want whatever you want. If you don’t want a mating ceremony, damn it to hell, we don’t do it. If you want to take some time and think, that’s fine too.”

“But know that I love you Nesta and I will never resent you for being you. I will never not want to be with you. Ten years from now, two hundred years from now, you are all I will ever want by my side. Know that if nothing else.” — kindly fuck off because I’m having to hold back tears this is fucking perfect. How dare Cassian say he doesn’t have a way with words and then starts speaking in poetry and vomiting love declarations worthy of literary awards

He had never been one for poetry, for flowery words and beautiful language. It wasn’t in him but something in him knew this much had to be said. They’d had a whirlwind relationship these past few months and he knew so much had been left unsaid. Some of it was fine, but some of it he knew had led to distress. To him. To her. He’d had so much more to say the night she’d all but banished him and gone to Emerie’s. So much planned and he’d never done it, never thought to in the aftermath of the Blood Rite and Nyx’s birth. — Facts, they did everything backwards because of the way and trauma and everything in between

Cassian opened his eyes and watched her. He vowed, “I promise, on breath and blood, I will be with you for as long as you’ll have me. I will love you for the rest of our entire lives and I will cherish every moment we are given together. And when this world ends I will search for you in the next. And through it all, I will never stop loving you.” — IT GOT BETTER FUCK OFF NIN

I’m screaming crying throwing up in the best way. Love you but also fuck off 💜

Moments V

A/N: I’ve been working on this fic for over a year and I’m so happy it’s done. I really wanted this conversation to happen right after the Blood Rite or even after Nyx’s birth but alas. So anyways, here we are.

Moments Masterlist

~*~

Part V: Shackled

Nesta surveyed the cerulean gown, fingers gliding over the satin before turning away. It was a silent rejection, one of many, and he moved out of the way as the tailor pursed her lips but replaced it with a red one.

Cassian had come with her to help her pick out a dress for her sisters and Emerie to wear at their mating ceremony, but after the tenth one he was beginning to feel antsy. It wasn’t that he minded the small boutique, hidden amongst stores selling sweet caramels and cakes, or fresh bread and spiced meats. He’d been here before, rather, he’d been wrangled over with Mor and Amren, even with Azriel to find gifts for the females he never brought to meet them.

It was Nesta’s neither here nor there look on her face that had him apprehensive. She’d been deemed fully healed and back at her full strength three days after the Blood Rite and so preparations for their Mating Ceremony had taken over immediately. She’d doled out the responsibilities the night before; Mor on decorations from whatever colors and schemes Nesta already had in mind, Elain and Feyre on the guest list, Azriel to set up security parameters, and Amren to confirm with all the vendors they bought from. Rhys was of course the master fund for all expenses, to which Nesta had agreed to with a sly smirk.

Yet today, their first day out together since everything had been settled, to find dresses and taste cakes, was proving to be difficult. If it had been a case of true dislike, or perhaps indecision, Cassian wouldn’t have minded. But Nesta had never been an indecisive person- she knew what she preferred and it never took her long to get what she had in mind. So he knew something was wrong when she’d given her silent or quiet rejections to the various cakes and dresses and flower assortments.

“That’s alright,” he finally decided to cut in, before the boutique owner began laying out another collection of dresses. “We’ll come back another day. Thank you for your time today.”

The boutique owner didn’t seem to mind, likely happy to be rid of them, and he bade her another farewell while ushering Nesta out.

“We weren’t done,” Nesta said when they were finally a few paces away from the shop. “I need to get things done today if the ceremony is in a few days.” A risky timeline for a wedding ceremony, let alone a mating one that was as extravagant as they’d planned it to be. But he ignored that.

She had pulled herself out of his grip, crossing her arms in the middle of the cobblestone street, staring him down with that familiar fire. He’d missed it these past few days but had attributed it to exhaustion from the Rite or nerves from what she’d endured. And he’d stayed silent about it too. Perhaps stupidly, perhaps warily, but he’d kept quiet, even when the dejected look on her face seemed to be worsening with each passing day.

“We’re not getting anywhere right now. How about we take a break and come back another day, Nes?”

She didn’t move so he reached out his hand, waiting. Always waiting. Something was wrong but she’d speak when it was time. Until then, he was fine to walk with her in silence for however long she needed.

A few breaths passed but she finally loosened her stance, moving closer before grabbing his hand. He pulled her in tight, wrapping an arm around her waist before moving them down the street. She allowed it and he pressed a kiss to her crown before ushering them towards a juice stall with a long line.

She looked up at him, a small smile gracing her beautiful face. He traced the curve of her lips, the slope of her nose with his eyes, taking in the beauty. He might have been staring too long as a lovely blush colored Nesta’s cheeks and she shoved his face away.

“Stop that,” she snapped, but there was no bite to it.

“Never,” he promised, pressing a chaste kiss to her cheeks before changing to another line that was selling something that smelled tempting each time the wind blew past it.

”If you were hungry you could have just said that,” she huffed, but it was all amusement now.

He thought about it, taking a few steps forward as another order completed ahead of them.

“Fine, yes, I did want to eat,” he admitted, ignoring the smirk she sent his way. “But I had us leave because it wasn't getting anywhere. You didn’t want to be there so why suffer through it.”

She stiffened in his hold and he knew he’d probably struck a chord. That hadn’t been his intention, but he cursed himself silently. Sometimes his honesty got him into more trouble than he asked for.

They were silent for the rest of the line with Nesta only speaking to the vendor and ordering fried potatoes with cheese and a mint lemonade.

”No, I don’t want fish, thank you,” she spoke quickly, cutting her eyes at him as he made to speak. She rolled her eyes at him as he paid, thanking the stall owner before grabbing their food.

”You could use the protein. We’re going back to regular training in a few weeks,” he called behind himself, knowing she’d have something cutting to add. He delighted in it, teasing her incessantly about her huffy dislike of all the things he tried to get her to eat.

“And you could stand to skip it,” she said sweetly, with nothing kind in her smile. She reached for her plate and popped a wedge into her mouth before continuing. “I mean truly, I don’t know what they’re feeding you, Cassian. You don’t need any more muscles to ogle at.”

He chuckled at that. “Don’t you mean more muscles for you to ogle at.”

Her eyes narrowed but she shook her head emphatically, finally giving into the banter he’d so desperately been trying to distract her somber mood with.

“It’s embarrassing honestly, all the staring I get when I walk around with you and your wings hulking behind me. The size of you is scaring the poor citizens of Velaris.”

“You don’t seem to mind the size of me most days. And nights. Especially nights,” he added with a wicked grin.

She blushed, breaking her gaze from his own, snickering quietly even as she stared out at the harbor.

“You’re an idiot,” she finally settled on, mouth twisted in a wry half-smile.

”You still laughed,” he pointed out, poking her cheek as she swatted him away.

They ate in peaceful silence, until a restless urge overcame him and he couldn't keep it in any longer.

“You're not happy.” It was an observation from the past few days. Her face, her mannerisms, her behavior all had him more worried with each day.

“What?,” she asked, startled at his words.

He tried again, grabbing aimlessly for better words to get through to her.

“Doing all this I mean. I don't have much experience as a bride of course, but I think you're supposed to be enjoying yourself.”

“I am,” she protested quickly. Too quickly.

“I am,” she tried again, but it was quiet and a far more obvious lie this time than he was used to seeing from her.

“I just mean, your heart doesn't seem to be into it. Do you not want this ceremony?”

There he had said it. It had been a concern he'd toyed with for the past few days but he's convinced himself there was nothing to it. That he was imagining it. But he'd said the words and Nesta hadn't jumped to deny it. In fact she'd gone silent, looking everywhere but at him.

“We should go,” she finally said, her food half uneaten, lemonade completely untouched. “It's getting dark.”

And that was that.

She seemed to be waiting for him to finish his food but he found his appetite wholly gone then. It was a quiet, painful walk back to the House of Wind and an even worse flight up. Nesta did not look at him, did not dare to meet his eyes, and he found himself secretly relieved. He didn't want to know what he'd find should she look up at him. Disappointment or anger or perhaps both.

Nesta broke away from his hold too quickly for him to not notice it and grimace. But something held her back, one foot in the terrace they’d arrived on and one foot inside the House, and Cassian watched expectantly.

”Can we talk?,” she asked softly, looking back towards him. Something was stirring in her blue-gray eyes and it gave him pause and a moment to reconsider. But something within him told him to agree, and go forward.

He took the few steps to reach her and placed a kiss at the back of her head. “Always,” he promised.

She led him to the smaller alcove they sometimes used to have lunch in between trainings. It was a cozy room, with a fireplace they no longer needed in the blooming heat of summer, and two plush armchairs facing each other.

Cassian sat, stiff and uncertain, but he did it. She settled in across from him and to an unpracticed eye they’d see her move as elegantly as ever. But he saw the faint tremor in her hands, her gaze, the nervousness in all of it. And it set him on edge.

”I didn’t want an audience,” she started. “Out there I mean,” she nodded to the terrace and the world that lay below them. “We’ve done that before and I don’t want to get into another screaming match over the Sidra while all of Velaris watches.”

So it would be that sort of talk. He had to agree though. It wasn’t his finest moment and considering they were extensions of the royal family, it didn’t represent them all very well by public opinion.

Nesta played with an errant string on her shirt, fidgeting with it until he cleared his throat. She met his eyes then and he was terrified of what he saw. Before he could brace himself for whatever blow she was about to land, whatever hit-

“I think we should cancel the mating ceremony.”

The room was suddenly suffocating him. Hot and wretched air seemed to be all he could breathe in and the walls were definitely closing in around them. There was no way he’d heard her correctly.

“What?,” he blurted out.

Nesta’s stricken face told him he hadn’t heard anything wrong and his worst nightmare was in fact turning true. Silence laid waste in the space between them, and the longer it went on the worse he felt. Nauseous and overheated and jumping out of his skin.

“It was your idea,” he managed to bite out.

“I know…,” she sighed. “I know and I’m sorry-”

”Sorry…,” he chuckled, but it was cold. Flat.

He shut his eyes, trying to reign in his temper. It had no place here, he knew that, not when she was trying her best to talk to him as calmly as possible. He knew she was going through something, had known for the past few days. Angry as he could feel himself getting he knew it would undo any progress they had made in the past year. Maybe all of it.

“Okay,” he started again, opening his eyes and taking in her guarded pose. “Can you…tell me why?”

“I don’t want to fight,” she whispered pleadingly. He heard it, the tremble in her voice, and it broke his heart that she was this upset.

”We aren’t fighting sweetheart. Talk to me.”

Nesta curled up on the couch, tucking her legs underneath her satin dress, and her arms seemed to be holding her together.

”I don’t think it’s a good idea. To have the ceremony.”

”You don’t want to be mated,” he summarized, trying and failing to keep the hurt out of his voice. Or perhaps it was desperation.

”No. It’s not that. I mean,” she met his eyes, some of the tension gone, to his relief. “We are mated. Technically. I just thought about it and the ceremony is official. I mean, we’re having the priestesses come in to bless it. I know all about that Cassian. It’s serious. It’s ordained by Prythian’s magic, the land’s magic. It is binding.”

Cassian scoffed. “And you don’t want that.”

”No,” she snapped. “I think you don’t.”

Before he could protest the shocking assumption she moved on, a hand shot up to halt him and whatever he had to say.

”My parents were a love match. Did you know? It was so rare where they’re from, so everyone in their families was against it. But they loved each other.” Her eyes narrowed in contempt. “It was supposed to solve everything. Should have. But when I was growing up, I know what I saw. Resentment and anger and frustration. They were stuck together and they hated what they’d become. My father loved my mother, and I think she loved him in her own way, but they weren’t good for each other, in the end.” She shook her head at the thought. “ And I see that now, far more clearly than I did when I was a child. I know how it happens and it never starts off obvious or grim. It starts off like this.” She motioned a hand between them.

“We are not your parents,” he pleaded, not even sure where this was coming from.

”We don’t know that,” she stated flatly. “And I don’t want you to wake up one day, ten, fifteen, two hundred years from now and realize that we want two very different things.”

”Nesta-“

She spoke so softly he almost didn’t hear it. So soft yet laced with heartbreak. “I don’t want you to resent me. And I never want to hold you back.”

He shook his head emphatically, hoping she understood. “Never. You could never do that. That is not us. Wherever this is coming from, whatever you’re scared of, that isn’t us.”

“It may be. It could be. It’s different for you,” she explained, shifting in her seat, hands wringing nervously in her lap. He wanted her to just look at him, hold his gaze in that fierce strong way he was so used to from her. But she was so on edge he didn’t know if she even could.

”Explain it to me” he said simply.

”You grew up here,” she tried, hands gesticulating around them. “This world, your world, it tells you these things about the mating bond that I have never heard of. That I can never understand. But I can tell from what little I’ve learned, it is sacred to all of you. It is…” she struggled to find the words.

Nesta stood up then, and he was taken aback by the sudden movement. But he remained seated, focusing his attention wholly on her.

”I loved you,” she breathed out, holding his gaze in a tearful snare. “I loved you from the moment I met you. I knew it was only ever going to be you for me. And that was enough for me. If husband and wife was all I ever got, it was enough for me.”

He opened his mouth to tell her he loved her too. That he’d been so enamored by her from that first moment they’d met, that he’d-

“I have only ever wanted you Cassian. But you, you wanted a mate.”

”No!” He shot up to his feet then too. He had to, to defend himself, to defend them.

Nesta ignored it, lifting her chin in defiance. “I don’t think I can ever live up to the myths and legends your people tell of such a union and the bond. Mates are equals in every sense of the word. We are matched somewhat in power but what else? I am not like you, nor your family. I am not good or kind or honorable.”

“You’re wrong,” he breathed out shallowly, moving towards her. She stepped back and it took everything in him to not howl at the motion. To gather her up in his arms and force her to listen, to see how wrong she was about him, about them, about it all.

“You said it yourself, so many times Cassian. I just never wanted to see it. And your family…,” she scoffed. “They’ll likely never let me forget it.”

”They aren’t a part of this,” he growled. “Fuck them. Fuck them all. All I want is you. Do you not feel the same? Is that what it is?”

”I already told-,”

”Do you love me?,” he demanded. “You told me you wanted a mating ceremony and now you don’t. You also told me you loved me. Or was that a lie as well?”

She lifted her chin in defiance, hackles already rising at the bite in his tone. And just as suddenly as he’d seen her temper spike to match his, it seemed to completely disappear. Nesta seemed to turn inwards, eyes downcast. “You said you’d be shackled to me.”

Cassian’s breath came out of him in a whoosh, and understanding had finally hit him.

“I didn’t mean it.”

”Then you wouldn’t have said it,” she stated coldly. “But you did, and, I can’t even blame you. I would not be my own first choice for a mate, so why would you? Given everything you have heard of this bond, in what reality would you ever want to be with someone like me. I fall flat of all the expectations and I see it and I accept it and that is why I’m canceling our ceremony. You want a mate but you would not have it be me if you had a choice. And I won’t force you into it.”

”Nesta,” he pleaded, hating the crack in his voice. Hating all that he’d done to get them to this point. He’d take it all back, all of it, if only to reverse this moment right here.

Nesta did not wait to hear more, see more, skirts bustling as she hurried out of the room, Cassian reaching his hand out far too late to catch her.

~*~

He would wait it out. That was what he’d promised himself when she’d locked herself away from him. He's convinced himself that he should take a step back, give her some space, and they’d try again the next day. Perhaps they just needed to cool off and Nesta more so than him, needed time to re-evaluate. But that plan had quickly disappeared when he remembered the broken look on her face as she’d reminded him of his cruel words.

Shackled.

It took him back to that night on the bridge. He’d thought to wait out then too, opting to see her the following day when they’d both had time apart. And what had it gotten him? A mate who’d been stolen from her bed in the middle of the night, likely convinced he hated her. And he’d never made it right had he? In all these days together, planning and teasing, joking and smiling, he’d never corrected himself. Never apologized the way he’d rehearsed and planned to as he’d made the flight to Emerie’s house the day of the Blood Rite.

No, waiting wouldn’t be an option today. He’d given her an hour and then made his way upstairs.

He knocked at the door forcing his heart to ignore the soft, muted cries he heard beyond it. If he let himself feel it all as he often did, he may tear down the door itself to get to her. Every instinct in him was roaring to the surface and he barely subdued them.

“Go away Cassian.”

“Please.” It was all he said, all he could say, but something in it seemed to have gotten through to her because he heard a murmur and then the telltale click of the lock. A phantom wind opened the door and blew him in, and he murmured a silent thank you up to the House.

The bed dipped as Cassian seated himself beside her, and Nesta burrowed her head further under the covers.

A tense silence filled the room and he heard Nesta grit her teeth. Cassian shifted closer.

“I didn’t mean what I said-”

“But you-”

“I know,” Cassian cut her off. “I know I did anyways. I shouldn’t have said it at all. It was spoken in anger and, Nes, it was a mistake.”

Nesta didn’t speak but she did remove the covers from over her and sit upright. Cassian controlled the urge to reach out and smooth her hair, the lines on her face and her tearstained lashes.

“I…” Words died on Cassian’s lips and he looked away. “I didn’t mean it in that way though,” he whispered hoarsely.

“What other way is there to mean what you said?,” she snapped.

Cassian got off the bed and turned his back to her. His wings twitched with irritation and he tamped down the urge to spread them to ease this edginess in his bones.

He turned slightly, dragging a hand over his face, suddenly feeling so tired. Nesta did not speak but her eyes were wide, glistening with something he couldn’t place.

He spat out the words High Lord, not caring if Nesta realized that the ire he felt towards Eris was still strong and present.

“You are,” she insisted, breaking the silence that had built up between them. Her lip wobbled but she didn’t cry. Instead she reached out a hand to him, and he took it on instinct. But he did not join her on the bed, instead falling to his knees before her. Nesta tightened her hold on his hand and he reveled in it. Delighted in that reassurance that no matter what, she was still here, still willing to hear him out.

“From the moment I met you, I was falling for you.” A whispered confession but he’d kept it from her for too long. She was doubting him. Them. And he couldn’t allow it.

Nesta blinked back tears, holding her composure far more than he thought he was going to.

“I know,” she whispered, more to herself than him.

He stopped before he made this new confession. Because it would either fall short on expectations or it would heal them.

Nesta was crying now, silent tears streaming down her lovely face and it was all he could do to not reach over and wipe them away. All of his instincts roaring to the surface to cut and kill and hurt whoever had hurt her. Except it was him. He had hurt her, so who was punished then?

”And I will never forgive myself for what happened with Hybern. I promised to protect you and I did everything but. When Hybern threw you into the Cauldron, right before you went in, you looked for me. In a full room of your sisters you were looking for me, just as I have always been looking for you.”

Nesta nodded, confirming what he’d always suspected. It was the bond he’d felt between them when she’d been thrown into the Cauldron. She had sought him out in those moments of desperation before she’d drowned in that black water, and he had died a thousand deaths watching her go in, helpless and useless as she fought alone.

“The mating bond snapped, and you went under the surface. I felt you drown, I felt you die, I felt you beg for someone to help you and then I felt your anger when you decided to save yourself and take something back. And it meant nothing to me. The mating bond. I was grateful to it, but all that moment caused you was pain and fear that will likely follow you for your entire life. And I would do anything to take that away from you if I could.”

He lifted her hand, clenched and bone-white in his own, to his lips, and he kissed it savoring the blood and life and warmth he felt under his lips. That she was here with him. Through it all, here she was, this female, borne of darkness and anger and fear and strength and calamity. Still she was here, still she was his, and still she stood tall and proud beside him. He’d never stop marveling at her, at all she was, and all she had survived and fought for to get here.

With him.

Nesta stroked his cheek and he burrowed into it. That warmth and life she held for him.

But Cassian had been consumed by her from the moment they’d met. And every moment after. If she doubted him, them, he had to do something about it.

He waited apprehensively for an answer, a sign, something, anything from Nesta to know what their next move would be.

Nesta didn’t break his hold on her, nor did her gaze lower from his own.

Nesta’s voice broke when she finally spoke.

“I love you too. I always will. I…I don’t know what the future is going to bring and I’m scared,” she whispered before leaning down and touching her forehead to his own.

He breathed her in, sighing with relief as some of the tension in both of them loosened.

“We’ll deal with it, all of it, as it comes. I’m here with you. Always. I’m not going anywhere.”

Nesta seemed to be holding in a sob. “Do you promise?”

He ran a hand down her face, her back, soothingly. She was all but shaking.

“I promise,” he said before kissing her. She kissed him back fervently and they were both out of breath when she finally broke apart.

Nesta smiled softly at that, before reaching for him again for another kiss. The kiss could have ended worlds. It could have stopped time. It was just them in that moment, bound by the very fabric of their souls, with the melody of their bond soaring high before tightening stronger within each other.

He’d meant every word.

So long as he breathed, he would be by her side, unyielding, loving her with every moment of their lives.

New Taglist: Taglist: @endlessdaydream @sleeping-and-books @purpleglitterypinecone @sv0430 @gwynberdara @karmasworlds @bookstantrash @duskandstarlight @d0riansgray @perseusannabeth@vasudharaghavan @sayosdreams @arielle-reads @theoverlyenthusiasticwriter @nahthanks @oversizedbats @swankii-art-teacher @inardour @rowaelinismyotp @starryblueskies7 @vidalinav @nessiantrashh @imagine-me @iwastoowildinthe70s @lady-winter-sunrise @vanzetanze @moodymelanist @wishfulimaginings @amaranthas-whore @simpingfornestaarcheron @generalnesta @mis-lil-red @nestaisgod @booksstorm @loosingdreams @champanheandluxxury @18moneytoad @starksravings @tinasbookishlife @cookiemonsterwholovesbooks @nesquik-arccheron @readingwitches @that-golden-lyre @awesomelena555 @wannawriteyouabook @story-scribbler @readingismyonlyhobby

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thebreakfastgenie · 3 years ago

Note

different anon and i'm just curious - why don't you like beejhawk? i mean not the ship in the show but just like in general?

Anon hope I understand your meaning. If I'm answering the wrong question, please feel free to send a follow-up! Also sorry for the delay, tumblr ate this and I had to retype it.

The main reason I don't like beejhawk is that I literally just don't see it. And while canon is far from the arbiter of everything, the fact is that it's not only non-canon, there's not even any teasing in canon like there is with Margaret. They are presented as very close friends whose friendship is especially intense because of the circumstances. That resonates with me. The way they behave is exactly how I behave with my closest friends. I really like that dynamic. The only reason I wasn't surprised to see people shipping them is that I've been around fandom spaces since I was 13 and I know the game. If I weren't online, I wouldn't expect people to ship them.

Shipping them is just way too much work. When I do ship non-canon pairings, they're usually ones that slot into canon fairly easily, like spirk. Watching with shipping goggles is exhausting! I don't want to be constantly reinterpreting canon to fit my ship, especially when that involves taking something to mean the opposite of what it says. I prefer to take the show at face value, which says BJ loves Peg and wants to be with her. Even if I were inclined to look for hidden meanings, MASH really isn't the kind of show that does that. MASH is not subtle. Even when it does have a double meaning, which is mostly reserved for the early seasons commenting on Vietnam, it's never in conflict with the surface-level meaning; it's still telling a complete story about Korea. So it just feels discordant to me to be doing that. Other people have told me they see the ship effortlessly and I'm not arguing with that, but I don't.

My general disinterest did sort of blossom into dislike because of fandom. It's just so dominant, it's not just the most popular ship, the entire fandom revolves around it, and the assumption is if you post about MASH on tumblr you ship it. And along with the ship comes a bunch of popular headcanons and characterization that I don't like or see. I don't see BJ as a liar, as evil, as insane, as unhinged, as gay, as repressed, etc. I don't see Hawkeye as a lovesick martyr pining after a married man. There is beejhawk that doesn't use that, but very little, and it's not worth finding for me. I do think punnihawk tends to avoid most of the characterization I dislike, which is why I can and do on occasion enjoy that. And when I did read beejhawk, it always felt out of character as soon as they kissed or confessed their love, even if I was enjoying it up to that point. The image of them growing old together is absurd to me. I'm not usually so frank about that, because I have friends who ship it, but I really can't imagine it. The insistence that there is no explanation besides romantic love is really off-putting, especially when I'm seeing that statement applied to things I literally do with my best friends.

Using that shipping lens does kind of ruin parts of the show for me, too. For example, the end of Where There's a Will There's a War, when Hawkeye is looking at the picture of Peg and Erin. To me it's about mortality and Hawkeye finally realizing what he can leave BJ when he's reminded of what's most important to BJ, what means the most to him. If it's some sort of tragic romantic moment I don't like it.

I have a thing for those comrades in arms type relationships that form under intense circumstances. I think it's fair to say they're something more or something different than the friendships most of us experience in our secure civilian lives, but I also think interpreting that extra closeness as necessarily inherently romantic is reductive. It takes something away. I don't like the Sam/Frodo ship for the same reason, but I do ship Legolas and Gimli, just for reference. Extremely close battlefield relationships happen in real life, and I'm sure some of those soldiers were and are in love, but I'm equally sure many of them were not and are not. And those bonds don't translate to civilian life exactly as they were, so in the case of BJ and Hawkeye I just don't see a path from the intensity they have going on in Korea to a relationship in the United States.

I'm not wild about wartime BJ/Hawkeye because I do see them as platonic and I do see BJ as straight, but I'm a bit more relaxed about that as long as it ends there. I think it undermines the ending of the show to put BJ and Hawkeye back together after the war. They can be in touch, they can see each other, but their lives have to be separate. And they do both have lives and familial obligations on opposite sides of the country. I have reservations about any MASH characters ending up permanently together, though I'm willing to suspend that in some cases for fanfiction. And I get that a lot of people like to put BJ and Hawkeye back together for self-indulgent fic purposes but that's not what I like to indulge in. The fun for me is staying true to the themes of the show as I understand them. And I'm not wild about them spending the rest of their lives as each others' lost Lenores either. They have lives outside each other.

From what I've seen, quite a few shippers view MASH as a love story. I don't. It's a war story. It's a tragedy, because it's a war story. Hawkeye and BJ's friendship is the central relationship from season 4 on, but it's not the only or even the main thing going on in the show. My interest is just elsewhere!

#mashposting #i probably forgot some stuff lol

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mcheang · 4 years ago

Text

@pendoodlex Do an Adrien Salt where Lila lies about Chat Noir and Ladybug being in a relationship and Adrien confirms the lie.

It’s my love life!

It’s easy to lie about stuff people want to hear. Alya was greedy for any gossip about Ladybug and loved support for her theories on Ladybug.

Recently they debated on Ladybug’s true age. Was she an immortal with teenage hormones and atttiude? Or simply a teenager?

Now they were on to Ladybug’s love life.

Lila: Of course LadyNoir is a thing. Ladybug just denies it because she doesn’t want to give Hawkmoth any more reason to target Chat Noir, but it’s obvious how much they care for each other.

Alya: Yes! A witness to Ladynoir!

Marinette: a lying witness

Nathaniel frowned. “I don’t know, Lila…”

Before Lila could insist she was correct, Adrien actually jumped in. “It’s true. Ladybug and Chat Noir are a couple. Sorry, Nathaniel, but she’s off the market.”

Marinette froze. Did Adrien just lie to Nathaniel about her love life? Just so no one would interfere with their beloved Ladynoir fandom?

WTH???

Overwhelmed by her hurt and rage, Marinette actually grabbed Adrien’s hand and dragged him out of the classroom, her face burning red.

Some assumed she was trying out another one of her confession schemes. Lila thought Marinette was going to tell Adrien she was a liar (eh, he already knew.)

In a far off corner, Marinette was whisper-yelling at Adrien. “What are you thinking? It’s one thing to ignore Lila’s lies, it’s another to endorse them! LadyNoir is not real!”

Thinking that Marinette still had a crush on Chat Noir, Adrien winced and rubbed his head. “I’m sorry, Marinette. But it’s true. Ladybug and Chat Noir are a couple.”

“No, they are not! Where’s your proof?“ She demanded.

Adrien thought quickly. “I saw them kissing on a rooftop last week.”

Marinette raised a brow. “Are you sure you weren’t just dreaming?” Her voice was heavy with skepticism.

Adrien: Positive.

Marinette: Well, I’m not sorry to say that you’re wrong. Ladybug and Chat Noir are not a couple.

Adrien: and how are you so sure? Just because you have a crush on Chat-

Marinette: Because Ladybug visited me after my dad was akumatized!

Adrien:…what?

Marinette took a deep breath. She hated lying but she also couldn’t stand lies about her.

“Ladybug consoled me after Chat rejected me. She reminded me about the other great boys in my life and ones I have yet to meet. And I asked her why she wouldn’t date Chat. Do you know what she told me?”

Adrien was quiet.

“She said she was in love with a boy from her own civilian life, not Chat Noir. To be honest, he’s not even her type.”

Adrien perked up. “Ladybug has a type?”

Marinette: Obviously. From what I hear, she’s more into the sensitive soul kind of guy.

Adrien: Chat is sensitive!

Marinette just stared at her crush in disbelief. “Um, yeah, no. The dude sulks whenever he gets rejected and has no idea what no means. For crying out loud, he gave me a pink rose before dumping me, and that was after he ate the treats my dad baked for him.”

Adrien: For someone with a crush on the hero, you sure sound bitter.

Marinette exhaled again, calming herself. “I’m not bitter. I’ve moved on, truly. Enough to see what Ladybug meant when she said I’ll move on soon enough. I’m over Chat.“

Adrien raise his brows.

Marinette continued, “I’ve been able to analyse his actions without the hero-crush filters. Be honest, Adrien, how would you feel at having to constantly reject the same person over and over again? Wouldn’t you be annoyed by their repeated flirtations?”

Adrien shrugged. “I reject fans all the time. Well, not exactly. I just ignore their love letters.“

Marinette shook her head. “That doesn’t count. You don’t know those people. Let’s say Chloe was going to confess her love to you every day. And you have to reject her every day. When you reject her, she raises a fuss and causes an akuma. How would you feel about your childhood friend?”

Adrien grimaced. “That would suck. I would avoid Chloe just to avoid her confessions.”

Marinette raised her hand, like there you go. Point proven.

Adrien wasn’t done. “But,” he insisted stubbornly, “it’s different for LadyNoir. They’re partners. Yin and Yang. A superhero duo. Who else is she going to end up with if not her partner? These kinds of pairings always win in the end.”

Marinette: that’s just sad. You’re comparing Ladybug’s love life to fiction. Life isn’t a fairy tale, Adrien. you don’t decide who Ladybug ends up with, and it’s not right for you to lie about her either.

Adrien: LadyNoir will happen. I’m sure of it.

Marinette: You’re not even going to take back that lie, are you?

Adrien: Why would I? It’s going to be fact.

Marinette said sadly, “Goodbye, Adrien.”

After school, Marinette tore down her posters of Adrien. Filters removed, indeed.

Tikki: Don’t worry, Marinette. I’m sure things will come right in the end.

Marinette: that doesn’t mean I can’t help set things back in order. Tikki, spots on!

Alya turned around at a tapping on her window.

Alya: Ladybug!

Ladybug: Hey, Alya. Listen, I’ve been reading your blog, and I need to set some facts straight.

Alya: Is this about revealing your love life? Because honestly, it would be better to be honest about your love life than to let others hope they have a shot with you. Remember Copycat?

Ladybug: That’s my point. I’m not dating Chat Noir. I don’t even like him that way. Lila has been lying to you, Alya.

Alya: Um, she’s your Best Friend…

Ladybug: When did I ever say that?

Alya:…….. ……….Why didn’t you correct me before today, then?

Ladybug sighed. “Because i had called her out in front of Adrien, and she got akumatized. And when she disappeared for a while, I figured there was no need to bring her up.“

Alya: Hold on. Adrien knew Lila was lying?

Ladybug: Yes. Though I’m sure he must have his own reasons for protecting Lila. But back to my point. I am not dating Chat Noir, and I am not interested in him like that. My love life is mine to decide, not for others to insist on just because they prefer me with Chat. How would you like it if Parisians started pairing you with Pegasus or Monkey King instead of Carapace? With them insisting you break up with Nino just to be with someone they chose for you?”

“That would be annoying,“ admitted Alya. “And invasive.”

Ladybug: I want to do a live interview, to clear the matter up once and for all.

In this interview, Ladybug was professional and succinct as she stated she doesn’t know Lila Rossi and she is not in a relationship with Chat. She doesn’t want to hurt her fans, but her love life is for her to handle.

Unable to help herself, Alya asked, “If you don’t like Chat, who do you like? You don’t have to give any names, but just one little tidbit, please?”

Eh, why not?

Ladybug leaned back on her hands and smiled, her eyes going faraway and dreamy. “Mature. That’s all I’ll say.”

After all, Luka had always supported her crush on Adrien. He never pushed her, but was always there for her. Why didn’t she how good he was? Oh right, Adrien filters.

Lila was fuming. How could she show her face again? Where was an akuma when you wanted one?

The akuma was drawn to a LadyNoir fanatic.

Fight fight fight. Chat was noticeably sulky at having been rejected on air.

When Alya came over to interview, he insisted he would not give up on Ladybug. Alya raised her brows, “Yeah that’s fine. But just don’t be pushy about it. And from your attitude earlier during the battle, I don’t think you fit Ladybug’s ideal criteria.”

Chat flushed and turned away, using his baton to propel himself home.

At school, Lila was playing truant, and Alya was grilling Adrien for keeping quiet.

Adrien: her lies weren’t hurting anyone!

Alya: I’m taking into account your isolated childhood, so let me just say, lies are hurtful. And it’s not right to encourage and spread her lies either.

Adrien: LadyNoir has to happen!

Nino shook his head in disgust. “You sound like that akuma last night. Ladybug has the right to decide who she wants to be with. If you ship LadyNoir, that’s fine. But you shouldn’t let it get this far to decide for Ladybug who she ends up with.”

Alya sighed, “Let’s blame Gabriel for this and hope Adrien can still be saved.”

Alya also understood when Marinette gave up on Adrien after seeing his behavior. She was interested in Luka but decided to wait because she didn’t want him to be a rebound guy.

Anyway, Adrien learned to keep his opinions to himself when all they got him was disapproval.

Ladybug’s interview caused the Parisians to question if the Italian diplomat should even still be in Paris if her daughter likes to spout lies about their heroine. How could she let her own daughter lie about stuff like that? It was enough that Mrs Rossi was questioned at work and her ignorance unveiled.

Yeah, Mrs Rossi would be lucky to keep her job after this but it was suggested Lila be sent outside Paris since she would certainly be unhappy with her new pariah status. Lila was sent to a correctional facility where no one was charmed by her falsehoods. Hell, she couldn’t even contact her mother because she was even busier trying to make amends.

When Ladybug finally told Chat she was happily in a relationship with her new boyfriend, he was sulky. Oh sure, he continued to fight alongside Ladybug but he was hopeful that she would break up with her boyfriend.

Plagg: that’s a horrible reaction. Can’t you just be happy for Ladybug?

Adrien: love is irrational and can’t be reasoned with, Plagg.

Plagg: then can you at least be polite and respectful to Ladybug’s wishes that you stop flirting with her?

Adrien: fine. Being Chat Noir was a chance to finally express myself, though.

Plagg: there’s a difference between freedom of expression and being rude/disrespectful/obnoxious

Adrien tried to date Kagami, but she broke up with him. There was no point in continuing the relationship when Adrien was so fixed on Ladybug.

I’m gonna leave this open ended. Any ideas how you would end this story?

#miraculous ladybug fanfic #miraculous ladybug fic #ml fanfic #ml fanfiction #ml fic #miraculous ladybug fanfiction #ml salt fic #Adrien salt #Lila is exposed #Lila gets exposed #post-Chameleon #Marinette x Luka

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alexjcrowley · 2 years ago

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I reblog this because I don't think it would have fit in a comment, but, first of all, thanks for expanding on that @queer-frenchmermaid .

Basically, the year after the "accident" I met the people who are now some of my best friends, and they are a bunch of teens two years younger than me. It's a very small age gap between me and them, but, even before I started college while they were still in high school, I could feel the distance between us.

And it's fine, there is an age gap between us and we're nothing but friends, when we'll be adults we'll barely feel those couple of years that separate us, but I know, before that happens, I wouldn't feel comfortable dating one of them (aside from the fact that I am not interested in them that way, aromantic here).

Growing up, I truly realised how off putting big age gap relationship in media when one of the two is a teen are. And I said growing up, because when I was young I remember too many products selling me the idea that teens and adults hooking up was sexy, and I bought it. Now I look back at it and all I can think is "this is not a conclusion I could come up to by myself, someone put this in my head and, for the whole time it stayed there, it could have led me to something really dangerous".

I agree when you say adults forget how young 16-17-year-old really are, and as proof in media they always insist on a so called "emotional maturity" of the teen, thinking it fixes the age gap. It doesn't.

Maybe it's because I am still too young, but I remember being 16: I used to think the result on a science test would change the trajectory of my life. There is no common ground between a teen and a 30-year-old, not even a 25-year-old if you ask me. And even if they did have something in common, it is not enough to base a relationship on it.

The reason why teen-adults relationships are so uncomfortable to watch is because no matter how hard the writers try, it's always the adult taking advantage of the teen.

Teenagers and adults can have common interests and good conversations- I always was more comfortable with adults than with my peers, for a number of reasons- but there is not enough "emotional maturity", as they often put it, that can fill that age gap.

I'll go as far as saying that adults should be bored of having conversations with teenagers after a while. Not because teens aren't interesting, but for the same reasons I, as a 21-year-old, could have fun playing with 13-year-olds for a couple afternoons, but they are not a valid substitute for time spent with my peers. A kid doesn't understand my worries with college exams, a teen doesn't understand a grown adult's worries for taxes and a grown man doesn't understand the teenage worry about a math test.

Purely on intellectual and emotional levels, teenagers and adults couldn't carry on with a relationship, that's why the sexual aspect becomes the tow of the affair and the relationship becomes...just wrong. And not wrong because "sex bad" (I am aroallo, I get enough bashing for liking just sex), but because teens are always led to believe they are on the same level of adult and they just aren't. There's always a strong power imbalance, even if the adult in question is not necessarily a direct superior of the teen.

You are right, queer-frenchmaid, every normal adult should react like House. I wish there simply wouldn't be any more popular content, especially targeted to teenagers (take Pretty Little Liars, for example), depicting teen-adults relationships as something desirable and cool. I think it puts dumb ideas into teens' head (happened with me), while adults should be mature to realise there is something is wrong with it.

Sadly, I also have experience with adults who thought having a relationship with a student was desirable and cool, and thanks to my luck I also got out unscathed from those situation, but all the girls in my high-school class have stories about the latent creepiness.

I like how in the show we see House's reaction to a situation like this, a teenager trying to hit on him, and he reacts in the good, normal way in which adults should react.

House M.D. costantly show us House is morally ambiguous at best and he does a lot, A LOT of fucked up things during 8 seasons. Even the ones that aren't straight up illegal can be very morally reproachable. The way he treats his colleagues, patients and friend (Wilson, just Wilson) is something I'd never dream to do, and I mean it's alright, because that's the point of the show, House sucks, House knows no limits, no boundaries, no respect. And House is always talking about sex, never turns down an opportunity to have sex, he frequently hires prostitutes, he makes a lot of sex jokes about his colleagues, he is a walking nightmare for human resources.

But even he knows where to draw the line. He can be a piece of shit in many, many ways, but he is not a predator. I think it was important then, when they wrote the episode, and it's important now when people choose to rewatch it. House can a be negative role model for many aspects, but not for this one. I don't know, but in my opinion, considering how House was an edgy character a lot of men took as an example (I have one of those men in my family) it was important they showed "no matter how much of an asshole you want to be, being a predator is out of line".

Queer-frenchmaid, again, thanks a lot for your contribution to my post. I am sorry for the long reblog. You put things in clearer way than I did, but after rewatching these episodes I feel like I wanted to get these thoughts off my chest.

I rewatched the House M.D. episodes with the young stalker, Ali (you know who I am talking about, the blond teen interpreted by that one Gossip Girl actress, you'll forgive me if I don't remember her name) and I was positvely impressed by the way House handled it.

I don't know how in the fandom her character and her story are perceived, but I wanted to share my thoughts and my experience with a situation like that.

If you set aside the way he jokes about it with Cuddy and only focus on how he acts in front of Ali, House is very kind and comprehensive with her. To be honest, I think it was a good way to handle the situation, maybe even better than acting downright disgusted by the thought of having an affair with her, let me explain why.

The whole time, House never takes Ali's advances seriously, which already defuses the situation they're in.

House doesn't act like he is disgusted by the thought that something that could happen between him and Ali, he acts like it simply can never happen. He doesn't dignify Ali's flirting attempts with a serious reaction. He takes everything she says as a joke, making the thought that there could ever be something between them a joke in itself.

Whether he actually doesn't remember her name or he pretends not to, it's still a very good move to keep her at distance. He doesn't give her the importance and/or attention she begs him for. Even when she gets undressed in front of him, he tries to stay unfazed. I think it's his way to dismiss her: "this is nothing but a medical visit, I see a lot of naked people, you are not different from other patients so I won't act differently. I am professional doing my job, nothing more."

House avoids direct conflict as much as he can, so he doesn't have to logically debate whether it's right or wrong they have an affair. He knows the moment he enters that territory, this already puts them both in dangerous waters.

I think this sort of gentle let down is very effective. In my opinion, if House had blown up a fuse and started yelling at her or acted rudely towards her (therefore acknowledging her offer of an affair as a serious possibility) it could have only ended badly. Either she thought it was his way of flirting with her, or she would have tried something stupid to "get back at him", raging from pulling another stunt on him- like when she got undressed in front of him- or trying to seduce another guy for revenge, maybe even some other old man who wouldn't have been as decent as House to turn her down.

House acts very weirded out by her flirting, denying her any possibility to "romanticise" that crush on him. He brings the chemistry to zero in their conversations, which is saying something for a man who always has a dirty joke up his sleeve. He doesn't think twice about making dirty jokes with Cuddy, but, since he knows Ali may take his words seriously, there is no way he is risking it.

But what really hit me is the scene in the parking lot. During the episodes, House knows what Ali is doing is wrong and he turns down her advances, but everytime Cuddy threatens to take action against her House stops her. At first this might sounds contradictory for him. What, he won't flirt with Ali but doesn't take action to stop her from stalking him? Does this mean he secretly like the attention she gives him?

On the contrary, and this is the best part for me. Go watch the parking lot scene again. House is telling Ali to go home, then Cuddy arrives threatening to call security and House's jumps to Ali's defense. Of course he doesn't want Cuddy to call security.

Later we find out Ali caught a fungal disease, but House doesn't know in that moment. All he knows is that Ali is a very naive young girl who is making a stupid mistake pursuing him because she is young and naive, not because she is some twisted criminal. He doesn't want her to end up in trouble- even worse, legal troubles- over something dumb she is only doing because she doesn't know better.

He is protecting her by stopping Cuddy. He knows it's more important to protect Ali than to protect himself from her. He is a grown man who knows to turn down a teenage girl, Ali could end up getting a reputation as a stalker/criminal or, anyway, as an easy girl with a taste for older men, and some odler men might take advantage of it. It's simply better that he has to deal with her for a little longer than she ending up in legal troubles because of a stupid, fleeting crush. He knows that's all it is, nothing serious, and he doesn't blow the thing out of proportion for her sake.

At the beginning of the post I said I wanted to express my opinion on Ali's storyline because of my experience. Without going into details, I was too a young and stupid teenage girl who, at 17, got a crush for some sort of teacher/instructor who was older than me, he was in his early thirties. I was never as confident as Ali, but I tried to shoot my shot. He could have done something about it, we were abroad- I was abroad for two weeks in his country- so we would have never seen eachothers again, the chances of repercussions would have been minumum, I was naive and easy to manipulate and it was me staying after the lessons to talk to him, one might have said I was "asking for it".

He never even acknowledged me. Same as Ali, during my last day in this foreign school- it was some sort of school holiday- he showed to not even remember my name. Did he actually forget it, did he pretend to, it doesn't matter. Look, maybe he wasn't even thinking of doing "the right thing" and I simply wasn't his type, or he wasn't interested in women, or he had a girlfriend, now it doesn't really mattered the reason he didn't returned my advances. Whether he didn't notice my interest in him or acted like he didn't, I am very grateful and I consider myself to be very lucky. Lesser people would have seized the opportunity and something very bad could have happened to me, but it didn't.

The way he "let me down" was very similar to what House did, in this sense, as he didn't dignify my attempts at establishing a connection with him. To this day I still don't know if he never noticed my "flirting" (my classmates certainly did) or he was just so kind to do nothing about it, and I am more than fine with not knowing. I realise it would have been worse if he talked about my situation with my actual school teachers, it would have put me in a very awkward position. I could have risked getting tangled up in some sort of school scandal and spending my last years of high school being known as the girl who want to get down with teachers (and a couple of them would have even said yes, but we don't have time to unpack all of that), I would have gained a reputation hard to get rid of and potentially dangerous. He pretended it never happened, and so I can do the same now.

Seeing House letting Ali down gently the same way it was done to me- it was a strange, but almost a moving experience. I have been Ali, I have been that very dumb, very young girl who thought somehow she could have done something with an older dude. I was lucky enough that the guy on the other side didn't take advantage of me- I was so lucky, so many people (and especially a lot of young girls, I have to say) get sexually harassed and/or assaulted and they're not even making the first move, like I did.

House M.D. didn't age perfectly as a show, it touches a lot of sensitive themes and not all of them are necessarily treated well, but to me Ali's storyline was handled very well.

From someone who lived it and got out unscathed, I hope every teenagers out there, if they ever get the stupid idea to flirt with someone way older, meet someone like House, who turn them down the way he did with Ali.

He never shamed her for going for an older guy, he knew it was something stupid teenagers do, he just let her understand it was a dumb idea. It's normal for teenagers to have dumb ideas, it's up to adults not to indulge them. It was never Ali's fault to follow House around (fungal disease or not), but it was House's responsibility not to accept her advances. I think more people should hear this message.

Stay safe, everyone.

#house md #greg house #gregory house #ali house md #tw: predator #tw: grooming

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ur-favorite-queer-queen · 4 years ago

Text

Enemies to Lovers

For Maribat March day 23 theme enemies to lovers

Master List

“Kent’s coming over.” Damian stated at breakfast, none of the other Wayne’s seemed phased by this, none but one.

“Again?” At Damian’s nod she continued, “I’ll be in my room or the Batcave so don’t bring him there.”

"He will also be bringing a friend over from that exchange program his school did with the one in London." Damian added, Marinette tensed a little bit but didn’t say anything else.

"Is Jon bringing a stranger over a good idea?" Tim asked.

"Tt, Kent said that he would make sure the boy wouldn't wander." Damian answered, after 9 years in the manor he still hadn't gotten rid of his tt habit.

"I'll be in my room then, I don't want Jon or his friend bothering me." Marinette announced to no one's surprise.

“Marinette,” She turned to look at Dick, “Why don’t you like Jon? This has been going on for almost a year now. Surely you could give him another chance. Or at the very least his friend?”

“Not interested.” And with that she finished her breakfast and went to go help Alfred with cleaning the dishes, like she did every morning.

Damian watched his younger half blood sister go, frown evident on his face. Marinette Wayne had been living with them for over a year now. While she was now 16, her opinion of one Jonathan Kent still had not changed.

After Bruce had a one night stand with her mother she had been born 9 months later, Sabine having no intention of telling Bruce. What she did not expect was that 15 years later she and her husband would be guilty of negligence and emotional abuse of Marinette and custody would be handed to her bio father. Aka Bruce Wayne.

Marinette changed her last name to Wayne and left her life in Paris behind. There was not much left for her there anyways. But she had never told her new family why she was so insistent on leaving Paris behind. More specifically who she was leaving behind.

The Waynes had gotten used to her bubbly personality in the manor, so they were shocked that when they sent her off to Gotham Academy she was dubbed the ‘Ice Princess’ the next morning.

Turns out after what happened in Paris, she refused to open up to anyone. Most days she was found sketching in her sketchbook, always alone. She still got straight A’s and even participated in a few clubs but never made one friend. It was concerning, how much she resembled Damian in that sense.

One day after patrol, after Marinette headed off to bed they started discussing Marinette's social life. Tim had joked that since she's such a ray of sunshine around them that she should meet Jon.

This idea was met with positive reactions, all of them agreeing that Jon would be a good influence for her. He was also her age so that was a plus. And he was Damian's first friend, perhaps he could be Marinette's.

That weekend they were proven wrong. Very wrong. Marinette refused to be in the same room as Jon, and when trying to gently push the boundaries she had set, she grew hostile. Something they had never seen from her for as long as they had known her.

One of their first thoughts was that she was scared of Jon, since he was half Kryptontian. But that idea was quickly shut down after Jason brought up the time she roasted Superman to his face. And had no regrets.

Then they figured it was because he was still a stranger to her. So they had him over more often. But after 2 months they realized that wasn’t the case either. Yet, none of them had the slightest clue why she was so against Jonathon Kent.

Not even Jon knew. All Jon knew was that whenever he walked into the same room as Marinette she grew annoyed. He knew she disliked him but that wasn’t what he was confused about. What made him confused was that he could sense her fear. She was scared of him, and he had no idea why.

He thought about telling the Batfamily, thought about telling Damian, but how would it go over that the latest addition to the Batclan was scared of him. Especially knowing how paranoid and protective they could be. So he just stuck to avoiding her at all costs, it wasn’t that big of a deal anyways.

Marinette didn’t see Jon as an enemy per se she saw him as an enemy, but he was just someone she strongly disliked, she had her reasons. And while Jon definitely didn’t see Marinette as an enemy, the more she ignored him, and he would need to ignore her, started to grate on his nerves. If she was in a room that he was going to enter he would have to wait for her to leave and vice versa. It was getting tiring and he was starting to dislike her more and more to the point she almost became his enemy.

Today would be no different except for one detail. That detail being a blonde haired, green eyed, sunshine child that reminded Jon of himself. While Adrien was a little too naive for his taste, they had gotten along great and he wanted to introduce him to Damian.

Adrien had seemed intrigued by the idea of meeting a Wayne. Apparently his father used to be a businessman and despite the fact he was from France and only moved to London a year ago, he knew of how famous the Waynes are.

Now here they were, in his dad’s car going to Wayne manor.

“Okay, you remember what I told you right?” Jon questioned Adrien, he was making sure the boy was prepared and didn’t accidentally stumble upon the Batcave or anything relating the Waynes to the Bats.

“Yes I know, no wandering around the manor, it’s too big and I’ll get lost. No staring in awe at the Waynes, they’re not the celebrities the press makes them out to be. And if I see a girl with dark hair, blue eyes, and looks to be a head shorter than me, I am to walk away immediately in the other direction and pretend I didn’t see her.” Adrien listed off.

“Perfect!” Jon, exclaimed he was going to add more but his dad interrupted him.

“Okay boys we’re here, I hope you have a good time Adrien.”

“Thanks Mr. Kent, I will!” Adrien cheerfully replied as he followed Jon out of the car. Sometimes this boy reminded Jon too much of himself.

“Master Jon, lovely to see you again. Is this your friend?” Alfred greeted them at the door.

“Yep! This is Adrien Graham de Vanily, Adrien this is Alfred, the Waynes butler but is more like a surrogate grandfather if anything.” Jon introduced.

“Nice to meet you Mr. Alfred.” Adrien stuck out his hand to shake.

“It is nice to meet you too Master Graham de Vanily, please just call me Alfred.”

“Then you can just call me Adrien, Alfred, my last name is such a mouthful.”

“Of course Master Adrien, now will you two be staying for dinner?”

“I don’t know, is it okay if we do?” Jon answered, secretly asking if she would be okay with it.

“It’ll be okay Master Jon. I will inform the others we will be having two guests stay with us for dinner.” Alfred led them inside, “Master Damian should be in the gaming room.” And with that he left.

“Come on, Damian is probably setting up some games for us to play.” Jon grabbed Adrien’s hand and started dragging him down a hallway.

Marinette could hear when Alfred had opened the door for Jon and his friend, she didn’t have super hearing but she had trained her ears for listening for certain things. Like the front door opening.

After a few minutes Alfred had come to tell her the two would be staying for dinner. It wasn’t ideal but she could live with it, all she had to do was give Jon and his friend the cold shoulder for at most an hour. Nothing new to her.

Now a whole hour had passed and she was getting hungry. She still had another hour till dinner so a small snack would be fine. But leaving her room posed the risk of running into Jon or his friend, and she didn’t want to risk an interaction with either of them.

Both of them are with Damian right now. There are no bathrooms near her room or the kitchen. If she hurries it will only take her 10 minutes to get to the kitchen, grab the cookies she made earlier, and come back to her room. And since Damian was banned from the kitchen this week, and both of his new friends are stuck with him, they shouldn’t be anywhere near the kitchen.

Of course when was the universe ever on her side. She was about to open the kitchen door when someone she thought she would never have to see again uttered her name, “Marinette?”

She knew the voice. It was the same voice that told her to stay quiet all those years ago when a vicious liar ran her mouth. The same one that said he was on her side then abandoned her the second things got too tough for him. The same one that didn’t speak up whenever she tried to defend herself, instead saying not to rock the boat. And now the owner of that voice was in her home.

She steeled her face into something cold and emotionless, despite the fear she felt in her stomach and turned to face him, “Agreste.”

“It’s Graham de Vanily now.” He corrected, both forgetting/not noticing the two other people there.

“Pretty sure it’s Agreste, you know, just like your father.” She bit back, venom laced into every word.

“He’s not my father, not anymore.” He replied, fists clenched at his sides, staring her straight in the eyes, confusing the other two boys.

“You sure, because you’re exactly like him, you know.” She raised an eyebrow and matched his gaze.

“I am nothing like him.” Adrien took a threatening step forward and that’s when Damian immediately stepped in front of Marinette, wanting to protect his little sister from this person who just threatened her. Damian was about to ask something but was cut off when Marinette moved around him to face Adrien.

“Really? Both of you put your own wants and desires above the well being of other people. Your father the people of Paris, and for you it was me.” Jon saw she was visibly shaking, from fear or anger he wasn’t sure. Both emotions were pretty strong for her, and when he focused on Adrien all the boy felt was guilt.

“Look Mari I’m-” He was cut off by Marinette’s angry shout.

“You would think that after all you put me through you would at least have the dignity to not call me by a nickname that friends are only allowed to call me. You know, people who actually care about me!”

“Marinette, I’m sorry okay, that was really dumb of me!” Adrien shouted back.

“Save it! You can pretend to regret your actions all you want, but people like you don’t change! That’s something you taught me!” Snack forgotten, Marinette ran back to her room and slammed the door. Locking it, she slid down the back of it and just cried.

“You’ve got a lot of explaining to do Graham de Vanily. How do you know my little sister? Why did she react to you like that? What did she mean by ‘all you put her though?’...” As Damian kept spitting out question after question Jon followed Marinette. Her cries were the only thing he could hear right then and there.

As he made his way closer to her, the cries stopped, only tiny sniffles coming out. “What do you want Kent?” He could hear the shaking in her voice no matter how much she tried to cover it up.

He sat down, his back resting on the closed door thinking about what he should say. “I wanted to see if you were okay.”

“I find that hard to believe. You wanted answers didn’t you?” She hiccuped in between words.

“A little bit.”

“Well once upon a time there was a teenage girl who wore rose colored glasses all the time. She saw the world in rainbows and sunshine, never knowing of the darkness. Then one day a lying fox came into her life, spreading her tall tales. The girl tried to warn her friends and family but they didn’t listen. The fox ripped off the girl’s glasses and forced her to see the world for what it really was. The girl’s love at the time came to her and told her to keep silent, after all the fox’s lies weren’t hurting anyone. It was then she noticed that the boy wore the same glasses she did, only his were much stronger than hers had ever been. But she loved him, so she believed him, that everything would turn out okay, that if it didn’t he would be by her side.

Slowly those around the girl turned on her, despite her doing nothing wrong. The boy who she once loved left her the second things got tough, never letting her stand up for herself. Soon the lying fox had gotten to her parents, things escalated from there. Now the girl moved to live with her bio family and everything was fine for a time. But then a boy who saw the world in sunshine and rainbows came around, and she was reminded of her past all over again.” Marinette finished her tale, her hiccups had faded away.

“You don’t like me because I remind you of Adrien?” He hesitantly asked.

“You don’t just remind me of him. Every time I see you I see him. But you’re also different from him. I don’t know. When you’re all happy and optimistic you're like him, but you also know how to be serious, which is something he could never do. I don’t know how to explain it but I thought if I kept you away from it would be alright. I really messed up didn’t I?” Marinette tried to keep the tears in her eyes from falling.

“Kind of. But if you want we can start over.” Jon suggested, he wouldn’t mind getting to know the Marinette Damian talked so fondly about, not that Damian would ever admit it.

He heard the lock unlock and he stood up as the door opened. He turned around and there was Marinette, her eyes were a little red and she had tears stains on her cheeks but she looked much better than before.

She stuck her hand out, “Hi, nice to meet you, I’m Marinette Wayne.” She looked up to look in his eyes and wondered if they were always so blue. And oh god please say she didn’t start blushing!

“Nice to meet you Marinette. I’m Jonathan Kent, but you can call me Jon.” Jon took her hand and shook it, his eyes looked into hers and he couldn’t help but think they looked so beautiful when they weren’t glaring at him. Unfortunately, Damian’s scream broke them out of their daze.

“ANSWER ME!!!”

“We better go help him.” Marinette pulled her hand back.

“Yeah we probably should.” Jon replied but Marinette was already racing to where they left the boys. Jon ran to catch up with her, mentally berating himself for thinking his friend’s sister was cute.

Marinette on the other hand was mentally berating herself for thinking that someone she used to dislike so much was now cute. Not to mention he’s her brother’s best friend. Well, Damian doesn’t have to know she thinks that.

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I’m back from the dead! As I said before in What If... (which you can find on my master list day 22) school sucks and has been burying my grave so I had to focus on that for a while. But I have this and What If... done and am planning on doing the other days I have not crossed off on my Master List.

This took so long to write and I’m already planning a part 2. Anyways hope u enjoyed!

@maribatmarch-2k21

#maribatmarch2021 #maribat #maribat march #marijon #enemies to lovers #planning a part 2 #stay tuned #marinette wayne #little sister marinette #big brother damian #adrien graham de vanily

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goggles-mcgee · 4 years ago

Note

Okay, So I need to Ask Um, Got any salt on Marinette's Parents? Because as much As I love them in the show, They are almost never around to do anything.

Oh yeah definitely.

The show shows them to be loving supportive parents and I think a lot of us like to latch onto that when writing but when you take a step back, you realize they are almost never around and why? Because of their business. They are neglectful. Now it very well could be they don't mean to be, but the fact of the matter is, they are and as a result of that Marinette is very mature and always feels pressure to do things on her own or to make things perfect. That's a lot to put on a child.

Anyways mini rant over! There are 3 ideas on my Dead Sea Salt List that include Tom and Sabine salt and I shall tell them to you and the ways they are salted!

Idea 3. Marinette, The Rolling Stone:

This one is obvious here as this whole story is about Jagged and Penny adopting Marinette. Tom and Sabine like to think they know their daughter but the truth is they aren't around a lot. They don't even notice that she doesn't hang out with the girls in class anymore and hasn't done so in months for crying out loud! They don't even notice that she hasn't gone out to hang out with her friends either.

But then Marinette's friends come in and start telling them that Marinette is bullying the new girl, they don't even recognize Lila from when she almost got Marinette expelled, and Lila herself creates a sob story and well Tom and Sabine notice then and there just how often Marinette has been at home by herself. They fall for the lies.

And well, this is a blessing in disguise for them, they were getting busier with the bakery and thinking of opening up another location and doing that while juggling a teenager would be so difficult, especially a problem child. They decide to kick Marinette out, but they aren't "malicious" or "cold-hearted" they decide to emancipate her. They purely do it because they think they are protecting their family members by not letting Marinette manipulate them into thinking she's the sweet person they thought she was, and they want to protect their image. They don't want their family members to think ill of them.

Then Jagged Stone pops up wanting to commission Marinette, but Tom and Sabine tell them they grounded Marinette from designing and took away her sewing machine. He's livid and demands the reason why, they tell him and he just looks at them like they lost their heads, even asks if they did, because he knows there's no way Marinette would bully someone. They insist she has and she's changed and she's this horrible little liar and manipulator and that's why they are getting rid of her. It takes a lot for him not to get akumatized then and there but Jagged firmly says he'll adopt Marinette.

They try their best to talk him out of it but he's set. So they let him, they just know hope he knows he can't return her when he finds out they were right.

Life is good for them after they get rid of Marinette, that is until the interview. Nadja gets an exclusive interview with Jagged Stone, Penny Rolling and their new adoptive daughter that they have been raving about on social media. Nadja does nothing to hold back her disgust when she recounts what Marinette and her new parents had told her about Tom and Sabine kicking her out all because of a liar. The interview is an hour special where they debunk each and every single one of Lila's lies. And Tom and Sabine watch and the pits in their stomachs grow the more they watch.

After all that. Paris erupts. Gabriel literally passes out from all the anger and sadness he feels from his Miraculous and has to take sleeping medication and just sleep the day away. Everyone who had ever met Marinette was furious, not only at her school and friends, but at her parents too. Regulars who used to come in stopped. Which is a kind of a big deal in France, you pick a bakery and basically stick to it. Despite their products being good, people are hesitant to go to Tom and Sabine's, because how can they go to a place and expect to be treated well when the owners treated their own daughter so awfully and for what? For lies?

They can't even get a second location anymore, the owner of the place they were going to buy from refused their offer. They wanted someone who treasured baking and family to buy their place and they can see that Tom and Sabine don't treasure those ideals. They still get business, but it's not as good as it had been. Some people come in and buy something small but they always have something to say about Marinette, like how it's a shame she's not there, or how her cupcakes were always decorated the best, or how her smile always made their day. Little jabs that just made Tom and Sabine hurt more.

They tried to get Marinette back but to no luck. They tried to say the adoption wasn't legal because of the lies but that got slammed down pretty fast. They tried to talk with her anyway they could think of till she changed her number and Jagged and Penny threatened to take legal action against them.

Everytime they went out, it felt like they were being judged. Like people didn't even want to look at them.

Gina and Roland basically disowned them

Idea 6. Wish Me Away

Not a lot of salt but Tom and Sabine were getting more and more distant with Marinette the closer the big battle got. She tried to pretend she didn't notice but she did, they seemed to only be around ling enough to give her good mornings, obligatory 'I love you's', even when they had dinner together it felt like when they asked her how her day was they were only doing it because it was what parents did, not because they were genuinely interested. Everyday that got closer to the fight she had wanted to be honest and just tell them that she was being crushed under all the weight of her responsibilities but she knew if she did she would be met with disappointment and fake sympathy.

She knew it wasn't healthy, she knew it wasn't right, but Marinette figured she was better off than most kids so she never complained. Then the battle happened and the wish happened and honestly, her parents didn't notice she didn't come home. They figured she was at a friend's house. The second night it was a Sunday so they just figured she was still at a friend's. The third day it was Monday, a school day and nothing, she never came home for lunch which she always did, they remembered that at least. So they called the school to ask if she had been in that day but the school told them, very politely, that no one by the name Marinette Dupain Cheng ever went to their school.

Of course they freak out and assume this must be the work of an Akuma. But days pass by and they really start to get worried and try to get Nadja to help them but even she looks at them like they're crazy and calmly tells them they don't have a daughter. That's when they finally go up to Marinette's room and see it's just a normal attic. Then Marinette's classmates come by and her teacher and they ask where she is and they nearly weep because somebody else remembers her and they tell them what has been going on. They too think it's an Akuma.

Then Adrien comes by with a woman they've never met and he looks like he'll but they refrain from saying anything, they still keep their business going because they figure if it is an Akuma then Ladybug and Chat Noir will defeat it any day now and Marinette will come back. There are days when they forget that Marinette is missing and doesn't that just say something? But they have to tell Adrien that only a few people remember Marinette and they suspect it's an Akuma. They don't notice how pale the boy gets or the cold face his mother makes at the mention of an Akuma but they give them a couple discounted treats and send them on their way.

Then Ladybug makes an appearance on Nadja's network and says it's to give an announcement. She looks different, older, and her suit is also different but everyone is paying attention. She tells of the battle with Hawkmoth, Gabriel Agreste, that was the first big shock, she tells them that she was betrayed by Chat Noir, but she would not give out his name as he was already living out his punishments, she tells them that Hawkmoth made his wish and the world was paying for it, that Gabriel and Chat were paying for it, they lost someone dear to them, for Gabriel it was Nathalie, for Chat it was the previous Ladybug, Marinette Dupain Cheng...their existences had been erased from the universe but those who had wronged them or failed them would be punished with the memories of them.

Tomnand Sabine froze at that because it made sense, and at the same time didn't. How did they fail Marinette? They just couldn't understand it. Gina didn't remember having a granddaughter but she remembered Tom and Sabine calling and asking about a Marinette, and in a rare moment she had been in Paris during the announcement and had heard what Ladybug had said. She cried for the little girl she didn't know but she was angry at her son and his wife because they clearly remembered her so they were being punished, and she could imagine why. Their bakery was always their top priority, it was their baby, everything else came second. They never wanted a baby, they never said it out loud but she knew, so she could only imagine what this Marinette had to go through and she cried for the girl.

Roland remembered being helped by the heroes but he doesn't remember why but when he watched the announcement he thinks it may be because of the granddaughter he can't remember, he didn't want to see his son or wife, it had been that way for awhile, but he felt his heart wrench for the granddaughter he couldn't remember and would never get to know. Roland was even more disappointed in his son when he got a call asking if he remembered this Marinette, because it meant he had failed his own daughter and their protector. He knew he wasn't the best father but he felt outraged on behalf of the granddaughter he lost.

People found out that Tom and Sabine remembered and so they found out they were being punished, which made people a bit wary of them.

[The "new" Ladybug is literally just Tikki using Trixx's illusions, Tikki is hella petty in this fic, also okay that was more salt that I thought]

Idea 9. Ivy's Sapling:

This one definitely doesn't have a lot of salt towards them but there is some. They do care about Marinette and they see her as a niece more than a daughter. So they aren't really as involved in her life as maybe they should be but she understands that they didn't ask for her. When the problems with Lila start up they want to believe in her and they do at the beginning but they start to question of they could be true because of her background. From what her and Gina said, she was from the bad part of Gotham and so was her mother, they never told them she was Poison Ivy's kid, they just know that Marinette's mother goes by Pamela when she talks with Marinette on the phone.

So they don't fully turn on Marinette but they do start to be wary and more questioning, they don't trust her as much as they did before which does hurt her but they don't fully believe Lila and her classmates, or more like they don't want to believe.

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