#and also because sometimes the platforms are hands and undeniably it looks kind of sick

[vaguely-concerned]

thematic throughlines I am noticing in veilguard so far:

-- even at times when everyone involved is acting with the best of intentions, bad things and consequences still happen. how will you live with it, how will you move on from it? (b/c the alternative isn't pretty)

-- parenthood, leaving a legacy in other people's lives, what do we owe each other -- and what is too much to ask of anyone?

-- the tension between individuals and the organizations and structures they exist in

-- the transcendent power of love and connection to overcome despair (this is a bioware game that one comes free on the bingo card)

-- if there were a bunch of gigantic hands everywhere would that be cool or what? (it would)

[winchesterxxi]

Maybe Poe and Skywalker reader being married to each other. Their life together, struggles and everything in between

(force awakens to rise of Skywalker)

WARNINGS: Non-canon content for the sake of the request; Focuses more on the Reader x Poe relationship, so many plot points are left untouched (as in, Reader doesn’t know Kylo is her brother)

THE FORCE AWAKENS

You were stationed in Jakku with your dad and Chewie when a girl and a guy board onto the ship;

“Who the hell are you?” you ask, you and your dad with blasters pointed out to them.

They throw they’re hands up and from behind them rolls out BB8 and you immediately drop to your knees.

“BB! Oh my God, where is Poe? We lost his TIE signal two hours ago, we’ve been worried sick!”

“You know Poe Dameron?” Finn asks you, lowering his hands.

“I’m Y/N Skywalker, his wife.” you eye him, only now noticing he is wearing your husband’s jacket “W-Where is my husband?”

That’s when he gives you the news of the crash and you latch onto your dad, crying.

Days later, on Takodana you are under an attack by the First Order and just as you thought there was no hope left, a fleet of X-Wings come in and save you.

After the fleet landed, you went to meet you mom, knowing that she was the Commander behind this offence against the First Order.

“It’s not me you have to thank honey.”

“What do you mean?”

“Your husband’s the one behind it this time.”

“My...?”

She just nods your head and cups your cheek, stroking your teary eyes, knowing how you’ve been grieving, thinking that Poe had died

“Go find your husband.”

You run past her and your dad to the the landing site trying to spot Poe in the crowd, heart beating hard in your chest

“POE?” “POE!?” you scream is name, trying to find him.

Then

“Y/N?” you stop in your tracks and turn around, spotting your husband.

Your run to him faster than you’ve ever ran until you crash into him in a tight hug, crying.

“I thought you - I thought you had -” you sniff between the tears.

He cups the sides of your face “I know, but I’m here, honey. I’m sorry to worry you. You’d never get rid of me so easily!” He smiles into the crashing kiss.

He helps you blast the FO’s base's thermal oscillator after you witness Kylo killing your father, tears stinging your eyes as you charge ahead.

Afterwards, him being your shoulder to cry on as you mourn your loss.

THE LAST JEDI

Flying alongside him on the dreadnought attack;

“Y/N, FIRE NOW!”

You do as you’re instructed, your shot igniting the explosives that had been set inside the dreadnought making it light up like the 4th of July

“THAT’S MY GIRL!” he shouts over the intercom

When back at the ship, reunited with your mother, you’re the one that spots the Star Destroyer in the radar grabbing Finn’s forearm, alerting him to the map.

“We need to jump to lightspeed!” he states running to your mom, awaiting clearance to do so, hot-headed as always.

“Poe, we can’t do that! We only have enough resources for one jump and if we do so, they’ll just track us again and be without fuel.”

You eye your mother, looking for some help.

“Permission to jump on an X-Wing and blow something up?” he addresses your mom.

“Poe w-” you start

“Permission granted!” your mom agrees as Poe darts running

“MOM!” 

“Go get on one as well.” she comes forward and kisses your forehead “You’re a team now.”

Just as you and Poe are about to reach the X-Wings, him slightly ahead of you the FO manages to blast the platform, sending him flying against you as you both crash to the ground.

He his also next to you when you spot your mother floating in space after the attack and he grips your hand tightly.

You insist on pushing her to the medical wing but he stops you before you can do it

“Poe, I need to be with my mom please.” you grip his arms, sobbing.

He kisses your forehead

“I’ll go with her, you stay here please.” you nod, teary eyed at him “Finn, take care of her for me while I’m gone”

*FASTFORWARD TO HOLDO’S EVACUATION PLAN*

You believe her plan won’t work either so you lead the mutiny alongside your husband

That is until he is stunned against the wall.

You throw yourself on your knees beside him, cradling his head.

Turning back you spot your mom, alive, holding the blaster

“MOM? WHAT THE HELL?”

“I know you love your husband but for once, just drag his ass out.”

You are holding his hand when he springs back to life.

“What - What happened?” he is shaken

“Poe I-”

He pushes past you running to the nearest window

“NO!” he slams on the glass and you come up behind him hand on his shoulder

“Honey,...” he shrugs his shoulder off, facing you, hurt tainting his face.

“Don’t... Call me that.”

“Poe...”

“No! I thought we were in this together!”

“This plan is gonna work, you have to trust me!”

“How can you ask me that after what you just did.”

First serious married fight... yay.

You look at him, biting your lip, tears in your eyes before walking away.

“Poe.” he turns around and finds your mom, calling him and that’s when she shows him Crait and explains him the full and he realizes he was just an asshole to the person he loved the most.

“Oh my god, I’m such an idiot.”

“Yes you are. Now go apologize to my daughter.”

“Yes ma’am.”

*Cue romantic, cute and awkward apology scene*

When the time comes to face the First Order he boards on a speeder and you on your father’s Falcon alongside Chewie

And of course you then help him lead your people out of the cave

THE RISE OF SKYWALKER

So...you’re kind of the captain of the Falcon

Despite Poe being an undeniably better pilot than you, he insisted that you were the rightful captain of the ship now that your dad was gone.

And he loved to call you captain

It made you smile every single time

Fastforward to Kijimi when Poe has a blaster pointed to his head

You are quick to point your own to the armored woman behind him

“Blaster off him, now.”

“She won’t ask twice, I would listen to her”

“Who are you?” you ask, blaster still up as she hadn’t let hers down

“Honey, this is Zorii. Zorii, this is my wife, Y/N”

Her helmet turns to you “Wife? There are actually people out there who go along with what you say.”

“Oh, you’d be surprised.” he retorts and you snap a look at him

“I could pull this trigger right now.” She says, pushing the blaster harder against Poe’s head.

“You do that, my blaster is the last thing you’ll see in this life.”

“We’re trying to find Babu Frik.” Poe tries to ease the situation

“He only works with the crew. That’s not you anymore.”

“What does she mean crew?” you ask him

“Oh your wife doesn’t know?”

you look between her and him confused

“Funny he never mentioned it...”

“Married people are still allowed secrets Zorii - “ he tries

“Your husband was a spice runner.”

Your eyes almost pop out of your eye sockets

“You were a spice runner? In almost 5 years of marriage NOT ONCE did it occur to you to mention that!?”

Once again, next to him when one of the stormtroopers blasts him in the arm inside the Star Destroyer

“POE!”

Standing in line next him, Chewie and Finn

“Were you ever going to tell me you were a spice runner?”

“You’re still on that?”

“OH I’M SORRY, IS THIS A BAD TIME?”

“IT KIND OF IS, YEAH!”

“Well, because later doesn’t really seem like an option right now -”

“You don’t say -”

“And if my husband has some other important life information before meeting me that I should be aware of, I would like to know becasue for all i know, you could’ve even been a stormtr--”

BAM

Troopers dead, you all alive

Hux admits to being the spy

“I KNEW IT” he points out

“No, you didn’t.”

 While on one of the Endor’s moon your mom uses her last breath to reach out to you trough the Force

You are a few feet behind Poe on the grass and fall to your knees with a thud

He looks over at you, face dropping as he runs in your direction

Your face is white and your look is blank and he is trying to shake your shoulders to gain some attention from you

“My mom...” You look up at him and he immediately understands, gulping hardly. He doesn’t say a word, simply pulling you into a crushing hug as you scream into the ground, tears running down.

Later, back at the resistance base, after you’ve said your goodbyes to your mom, Poe is the one sitting next to her linen-covered body

“I... I promise I’ll take care of her. Not just now, or in the near future, just... forever. I’ll stay by her side, always, Leia. Your daughter... Your daughter is the love of my life.”

After you defeat the First Order, during the celebrations Poe pulls you aside to a quiet place and tells you that he wants to settle down.

You agree with him, teary eyed, kiss kiss, you know the drill

BB8 beeps at your feet

POST TROS BONUS

The both of you settled on Yavin 4, his home planet

You are blessed with kids, first a baby boy and then a baby girl, 2 years apart

Who you name Kes and Leia, after Poe’s dad and Leia’s mom, who devoted their lives to the resistance and in one way or another were behind the reason your life path’s ever crossed

Poe cried like a baby when you told him you wanted your first born to be named Kes

Occasional visits form uncle Finn and uncle Chewie

When it’s just Finn, him and Poe tend to go out and do “guy stuff”

While you sit back at home with the kids and BB8 who loves to entertain them 

And it isn’t rare for sometimes you being sitting on a bench, watching the three of them play in the distance, head on Poe’s shoulder, his arms draped around your waist

And you look to the side to be met with the Force ghosts of your family members looking down at you

[unholyhelbiglinked]

Camp Beaverbrook | 014

CHECK OUT THE STORY FROM THE START HERE | AO3 LINK 

(A/N: I’m at it again with the dark material, so please be aware of that. Also, this is an NSFW chapter so again, here is your official trigger warning) 

Dear Mom,

I’m ready to come home. It’s not like that achy feeling of missing you guys, that’s not it. You know what dad says “if you miss someone a little, then it’s not worth missing them a lot." sometimes the stuff he says comes back to me like that. I remember when he taught me how to throw a proper punch. That stuck with me too, I suppose… don’t get me wrong. I met someone here. I think you would approve- she’s very kind and patient and- neither of us wants to be here. Not anymore.

Aubrey M. Posen.

Aubrey wasn’t the type of person to hungrily press her lips against those of another. She certainly wouldn’t slam someone against the wall and let her fingers trail under the hem of their shirt. Not the type of girl to bite at a woman’s jaw and leave little welts of purple and black peppered close to soft skin.

Emily moaned into her mouth, the sound stifled and hot as she bucked her hips closer to Aubrey’s touch, her starved yet gentle motions. She had easily undone the button to Emily’s jeans, just as easily pinning her close to the wall. It was desperate, a sharp release that both women craved.

“Fuck, Bree” It almost edged her on, the way Emily writhed and grunted out her name as she moved against her fingers. Her nails dug evenly into Aubrey’s skin, sure to leave marks. Aubrey smiled into the embrace, nipping slightly at Emily’s pulse point as it sounded loudly. Emily knit her fingers into the woman’s hair, pulling in a mix of pleasure and pain. “Please.”

Emily whimpered into Aubrey’s neck, tightening in every aspect of herself as she brought her free hand up to her lips- stifling a string of profanities that would never normally fall from her lips. Aubrey kept her pressure, kept her tempo as Emily bit into the palm of her hand hard enough to drain color. She shuddered entirely, the effect dizzying as she let Aubrey hold most of her weight, an undeniable smile on her lips.

Emily let out a long breath, her heart dominating as she struggled to catch her composure and some sense of herself. Aubrey feeling an instant twinge of regret as she pulled her fingers away from the most intimate part of the girl. She felt like a bad person.

Aubrey swallowed away the dry copper taste in her mouth as she shifted her hand to the vacant space above Emily’s shoulder. In any other situation, she would be proud of the flushed look on the woman’s face as she tried to collect herself. “Are we sick people?”

“What?” Emily panted, glancing down for a moment as she fumbled with the copper button on her jeans.

The area around them was bathed in inky darkness- a tool shed that had been converted enough to hold the jet skis when no one was handling them. Aubrey and Beca were the only two in the entire camp that held access to the place. She had lead Emily here at the start of the night for some peace and quiet, something to still both of their minds. One thing leads to another and Aubrey had pinned the girl so easily against the wooden door. It barely made a sound.

“Someone died. I was attacked, and now we’re fucking in a tool shed.”

“Oh,” Emily’s eyes flickered with an intense sadness as she darted her stare down to the wooden boards of the space. There was a lingering silence, the sound of their breathing mixing among two jet skis and a net for fishing that hung against the wall. Emily giggled, laughed, loudly as Aubrey contorted her expression into some type of frown.

“I’m sorry,” Emily sniffed, trying to gain control of herself. “I mean, yeah. Yeah, it’s fucked. I don’t mean to laugh. It’s just… I guess grief has a way of bringing people together, you know?”

Aubrey did know. She felt like there must have been a better way than this, whatever this was. The pain, the pleasure, the solace of a camp like this, it was all getting to her. She wondered idly if it would be the same when she left in a week if Emily would write to whatever college she decided to go to. If they would finally see the reports on the news.

Emily let out a deep sigh, lowering herself to the platform that the red jet ski rested upon. It looked like a monster covered in a black tarp like it was. Something that would morph into a beast with glowing red eyes if Aubrey stared long and hard enough. Emily looked effortlessly at ease, though. She hugged her jacket close, sniffed as Aubrey watched.

“My parents split up.” Aubrey suddenly blurted out, and Emily flashed her dark eyes forward. They seemed to grow lighter. “When I was seventeen. Which, you know, happens. I get it. They fell out of love. Too many things changed.”

The older woman took a steadying breath, trying to focus her words. “I got home from school one day and they were both sitting on the couch in the living room. My mom had made little sandwiches and kept sweet tea on the table, and I thought that was odd because I hadn’t seen either of them in the same room for months… years maybe. We didn’t’ do family dinners.

“My father, he was a gruff man, an army man. And he had this soft look in his eyes when he told me that it was over between them. That they hadn’t been happy in a long time and were trying to stay together for the sake of me. For my brothers, but they just couldn’t’ anymore. They weren’t happy, and I understand that now.”

Emily swallowed thickly and nodded, her brow furrowed with that little crease that Aubrey found adorable and she listened intently.

“Anyway, after they told me that, I stormed out of the house and they let me… didn’t’ try to stop me or anything. I ended up at the movie theatre and I sat in the very back and cried during the loud parts so no one could hear” She let out a something of a bitter laugh, “Long story short I had my first kiss in the bathroom of a Cinemark with the guy who was in charge of making popcorn.”

Aubrey tried to pay attention to Emily’s facial expressions, but she couldn’t’ read them in the dark. Not with the way the moonlight only moved through the spare cracks of the little shed. She wanted to drink until she forgot, or fuck until she remembered. She wasn’t sure. Neither of them was.

“Did he taste like butter?”

“what?”

“The guy, did he taste like butter?”

The older woman laughed loudly, shaking her head “Yeah, actually, he kind of did.”

She vaguely recalled the taste of cherry coke, and the paper towel dispenser digging into her spine. She liked this a lot better- she liked pinning Emily to the wall. Emily didn’t taste like burnt popcorn, instead, she held the flavor of vanilla and warmth. That’s what Aubrey needed right now. Warmth.

She leaned down, pressing a deep kiss against Emily’s lips as the younger of the two let out a surprised groan, quickly curling her fingers into Aubrey’s golden hair, pulling with just the right amount of pressure.

“Do you smell gas?” Emily murmured against her lips, breath hot and dominating.

“hmm?” Aubrey stilled in her movements, pulling her touch away briefly as she glanced around the tiny shed. Did she? Right now, she could mainly catch Emily’s shampoo. But there was a damning scent that reminded her of a gas station. She remembered her father trying to teach her how to pump petrol, and then quickly saying that when she was married, she would never have to utilize this skill. “Yeah, kind of.”

Emily nodded, shrugging her shoulders as she nipped lightly at Aubrey’s lower lip and let out a breathy sigh. “No, seriously, I smell gas. That’s not weird to you?”

“You’re leaning against a jet Ski, darling,” Aubrey said in a hushed growl, pushing her nose close to the girl’s cheek. “If it eases your mind, we can leave. Go back to the cabin and get some rest?”

Emily contemplated her options for a second before smiling meekly and standing from the platform. She curled her fingers around Aubrey’s and lead her into the damp night. She could smell the lake and feel the subtle touch that Emily had to offer. It was not at all rushed, not at all dominating. It was soft.

Then there was heat. A heat that was undeniable and loud. The kind of thing that starts from the middle and expands- like a nuclear blast. Aubrey had read somewhere that an explosion could ring with enough force to leave chemical prints on the sidewalk.

They were standing in the grass, on the banks of a lake.

Emily drew in a breath sharp enough to cut through the air. Aubrey yelped and raised her arms against the wave of shaking sound that pushed forward. The scent of fuel ringing through the air as the wet grass took precedence under her knees.

Aubrey’s ears were hissing with warmth, heart pounding.

She had the air knocked out of her with a force unimaginable, her cheek pressed against the moisture filled grass, she tasted the dirt. “Holy fuck,” She couldn’t hear herself, a garbled mess of words “Fuck.”

Aubrey tasted metal that reminded her of when she would tongue her keys. It had started out as a convenient way to keep her hands full on the way to her car, but it had turned into a nervous habit. She knew it wasn’t healthy, but it never stopped her from doing it.

“Bree,” Emily choked next to her, digging her fingers into the soft soil “Aubrey, my god, are you alright?”

The older of the two let out a strangled cough and turned her attention towards the flames. It ate against the wood, completely devoured it from the inside out. There was no little shack, nothing but a pile of forming ash that filled the air with its toxic grey smog. Emily groaned and rolled onto her back, blinking up at the night sky.

“Did that-?”

“Yeah, fuck. You alright?”

“I asked you first.” Emily said.

“I think.” Aubrey scoffed, ever the smartass, even with her lungs steadily filling with flames, she nodded. Her body felt like lead, her mind running faster than lava. She vaguely heard Emily let out a string of curse words to her left, hissing, growling.

“My leg is fucked,”

Aubrey blinked a few times, almost like it would clear her hearing. She shot her stare towards Emily. Her usually calm features were coated in an even edge of dirt, crimson leaking onto the smooth expanse of her cheek. Aubrey couldn’t tell if it was from a cut, or from her ears. Her focus shifted to woman’s hands. Shaking as they clenched a crimson wound. It soaked into the wicking fabric. Emily’s blood wasn’t as bright as hers. It was thicker. It was dominating. If she rolled her pant leg up, Aubrey was sure, she would see bone.

“Oh god, it’s bad, isn’t it?” Emily’s cheeks flushed red “You’re green. And when you turn green then I know it’s bad- my mom turned green when she stopped to help a dog out of a bear trap once when we were camping. And Stacie was green yesterday when she saw your shoulder-“

Aubrey tuned the rest of her frantic rambling out. It was something that calmed Emily down, just the sensation of talking, even if no one was listening to their full extent. Aubrey had realized that a while ago and still found it charming. Even as she peeled her sweat soaked bandanna from her hair. It was a deep forest green. Aubrey began to miss other colors, like purple.

Emily let out a slight squeak that seemed to silence her completely as Aubrey tied the rolled fabric a few inches away from the wound. The tourniquet would slow the blood, at least for now, but she wasn’t sure if Emily could even keep pressure on it. “I’ll have to stitch you up.”

“What?”

“Emily, that is… really bad.” Aubrey tried to put as delicately as possible. “You should be fine, but we have to stop the bleeding, yeah? Away from here.”

Emily got that little crease between her eyebrows as she frowned towards the burning wreckage of the shed. She couldn’t’ make out anything past the rubble and the slowly dying fire. It smelt like the little circle they formed during their first night- but with less drunken mistakes. She could pour a bucket of cold water on those, but this was different. This was suffocating.

She helped Emily to her feet, the girl letting out a few whimpers here and there as Aubrey tested her own weight on her wobbly stance. “We’ll get you to Chloe. She’ll keep you safe until I can get back.”

“What?” Emily’s voice was tight “No. Wherever you go, I can go with you. I’m fine. You shouldn’t be alone.”

Aubrey studied her face. It was shaded by the orange glow of the fire. She let out a steady sigh and moved her thumb against the girl’s cheek. It was wet with tears, mixed with blood. It looked lighter now. More like Aubrey’s.

“I need to get Gail, darling. You can barely stand right now, much less make it up that hill. You’re going to Chloe’s cabin.” Her voice was stern, stern enough for Emily to contemplate her options before she tested her weight and winced. Aubrey knew she had her. Those pools of honey in her eyes pained yet understanding.

“I can’t lose you, Bree. I can’t lose anyone else.”

“You won’t.” Aubrey nudged her forehead against Emily’s, breathing in the sickening scent of vanilla mixed with ash. Everything was coppery. Everything was buzzing. “I promise. You won’t.”  

[shopggdb-blog]

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