#and all the ones I like have fcking goddamn grinch feet

[thelittlespanielthatcould]

Labrador (pretending that they have a coat you're safe around)

This is the scenario in which I actually get the service dog I desperately need instead of stubbornly insisting on getting the breeds I want because I want them. So, I'd expect a big improvement in functioning, yay! I could go more places and do more things. I would get harassed a more normal amount in public with a more typical service dog breed. Exciting to think about.

I would bitch and moan about having to get a breed not catered to my whims but then nothing would actually go wrong because there's not actually anything wrong with them. Inevitably, I'd fall in love, because they're a dog and they're my dog. Two years in, I'd be That Guy that recommends labs to everyone and prattles on endlessly about how they could do anything.

I would have a springy little field line female because the average lab is much bigger and bulkier than I'd prefer. We would do dock diving, agility, nosework, and canine freestyle. Maybe urban mushing, if they take to it. I would probably get a real kick out of having Big Gundog and Tiny Gundog. They would be a great travel buddy, and I definitely enjoy living with bombproof dogs.