#and a detective looking for some children that disappeared from a different foster home

[marjaystuff]

Interview with Sara Foster and When She Was Gone

Blackstone Pub

April 1st, 2025

When She Was Gone by Sara Foster brings to the forefront the unusual relationship between a mother and her daughter.  This intertwined within a riveting mystery allows readers to understand the mother/daughter dynamics.

Former Detective Rose Campbell who now lives in London is notified that her estranged daughter, Lou, has disappeared from a remote Western Australian beach. They have not spoken in years because of how Lou’s father and stepmother spoke of Rose. Yet, now Rose’s ex, Henry, has called on her to help find their daughter who is suspected of kidnapping the two young children she is the au pair for. The missing baby and toddler are heirs to a high profile and wealthy Australian family, the Fishers. Rose is intent on finding her daughter and proving her innocence. 

The detective assigned to the case, DSS Mal Blackwood, on the verge of retirement, is chosen because of his ability to solve some of the most intense and difficult investigations. At first, Rose and Blackwood appear at odds as to what really happened but that all changes when a disturbing piece of evidence is found on a nearby strip of beach, making it clear that they are caught in a race against time to bring Louisa and the children safely home. 

This is a very suspenseful novel that readers will not want to put down with well-defined characters that they will either root for or hate.

Elise Cooper: Idea for the story?

Sara Foster: When She Was Gone came about because I wanted to write a story set in Western Australia, where I live with my family, and so I began dreaming up different thriller ideas. The remote beaches of the southwest are some of my favorite places, and I also like writing about characters with connections to both England and Australia (like me!). Once I had the au pair character of Louisa, and her estranged mother Rose, the rest of the story began to fall into place. 

EC: Was the theme retribution, power, money?

SF: I think all the themes of retribution, power and money come into play at different times in When She Was Gone. Power and money are certainly deeply interconnected in this story. Money gives some characters the opportunity to act in ways that others simply cannot with those who don’t have money are much more limited in their choices. 

EC: How would you describe the mystery in the story and what was its role?

SF: The central mystery of When She Was Gone is the disappearance of Louisa (Lou) and the children, and this thread runs right through the book. I hope the reader is absorbed in the thriller elements of the story and the way this event has repercussions for so many people

EC: Is domestic violence the center of the story?

SF: I don’t think of domestic violence as the singular center of the story but it’s certainly a core thematic element of the novel. I wanted to look at violence in all its forms. Latent as well as actualized – and to think about how violent tendencies develop when early signs aren’t addressed. 

EC: Why this domestic violence book quote, “By the time a victim has been degraded, undermined, and attacked for years, they have lost all sense of control.  They exist from one terrified moment to the next, sometimes for years, and reclaiming their lives is a messy, protracted process.”

SF: I think it’s all too easy to judge domestic violence victims without stepping into their shoes, whereas there are many reasons why it’s hard to leave an abusive relationship. I hope my story exposes the complexity and messiness of these scenarios and encourages empathy rather than judgement. 

EC: How would you describe Rose?  

SF: By the time we come to meet Rose in When She Was Gone, she has gone through a terrible period of grief and depression after a traumatic work event as a young police officer, which readers’ witness at the beginning of the book, leaving her with PTSD. However, she has come through this, rebuilt her career, and is in a much stronger place by the time she needs to search for her missing daughter Louisa. 

EC: How would you describe Henry? 

SF: Henry, Rose’s husband, has been emotionally abusive to Rose over the years, withholding access to Louisa, making life generally difficult for her, and always putting himself first. This changes when Louisa disappears just as his third wife has given birth to twins, meaning Henry is unable to fly to Australia himself, and must therefore appeal to Rose to help him. He is a bit of a classic, self-centered, and narcissist. 

EC: How would you describe Louisa?  

SF: We don’t get to see much of Louisa directly in the story, only briefly at the beginning before she disappears with the children, at which point she’s obviously unhappy with the way the Fishers treat her and parent their kids. However, once she’s gone, we can only learn about her through secondary sources – her diary, her Instagram, and other people’s accounts. Through this we can see her strength and her vulnerabilities, and Rose must pray that Louisa is worldly enough to keep herself together in whatever situation she’s in. 

EC: How would you describe the Fishers? 

SF: The two young children who disappear with Louisa belong to a very wealthy family called the Fishers, who are used to getting their own way or using their considerable wealth to turn events to their favor. However, when these two very small Fisher children go missing, and no one has any idea what’s happened, for once money cannot buy the family out of this predicament, and they are forced to try to communicate with one another in different ways. 

EC: Anything else you would like to add?

SF: I write weekly on Substack at The Resiient Author (for writers) and Story Matters (for readers). 

EC: Next books?

SF: I’m working on another mystery thriller now with a few more puzzle elements to it, set in the Cotswolds in the UK, a place my grandparents lived for a while. I’m having a lot of fun refining the characters and plot, as I try to bring it all together. 

THANK YOU!!

[northernindigenousbeautyhailey]

Stories of the Unsolved

17 years ago since The Disappearance of TAMRA KEEPNESS from the White Bear First Nations in

🇨🇦Canada🇨🇦

Stories of the Unsolved Stories of the Unsolved

years ago

EARLY LIFE:

Tamra Keepness and her twin sister, Tannis, were born on September 1, 1998 to parents Lorena and Troy Keepness. The family were from White Bear First Nation, located in the southeastern portion of Saskatchewan Canada, and resided in Regina.

Shortly after the twins were born, Lorena and Troy separated, resulting in the two girls splitting their time between their parents. The majority of the time, they lived with Lorena, her live-in partner, Dean McArthur, and their three siblings near downtown Regina, at 1843 Ottawa Street. The neighbourhood was known to have issues, particularly regarding poverty and other social problems.

It was no secret that the adults in Tamra’s life struggled with alcohol and substance abuse issues. Dean, specifically, had served two months of a three-month sentence for assaulting Lorena while in a drunken rage. Due to these issues, as well as reports of child neglect, Social Services were often involved with the family, with a total of 50 reports made to crisis workers.

Despite what some might call an unsteady home life, Tamra was a smart and caring girl. She fiercely loved her siblings, especially Tannis, and she frequently had a huge smile on her face. She was also known for being feisty and a bit mischievous, and she was always on the lookout for adventure. When not playing Mario Kart on Nintendo, she could be found climbing her favourite pine tree at the end of the block.

LEAD UP TO DISAPPEARANCE:

On the evening of July 5, 2004, Lorena, Dean and all five children were in the living room watching television. At some point, Lorena and Dean got into an argument, which they claim was about nothing serious. At around 8:30pm, Dean decided to leave the house to cool down. While out, he ran into Russell Sheepskin, a man who sometimes resided in the family’s basement, and the pair decided to grab a few drinks together. Before heading to the St. Regis Hotel, Dean made a stop at a nearby 7-11 to buy some milk for his and Lorena’s newborn baby, which he later dropped off at the house.

Lorena spent the majority of the evening with her children. Between 10:30pm and 11:00pm, she sent them to bed and decided to head to a friend’s townhouse located a block over, leaving her eldest, 11-year-old Summer, in charge. After a while, she and her friend went out to purchase more alcohol and Lorena stopped by the house to check on things. When she returned to her friend’s residence, she called Summer and told her to ring if she needed anything.

At 12:00am on July 6, Russell returned to the house, incredibly drunk. He made himself some food and checked on the children. He recalls seeing some of them, including Tamra, sleeping in the living room, meaning they must have come downstairs after Lorena put them to bed. A couple of hours later, Russell was smoking a cigarette on the front porch when he encountered Dean. The pair got into a physical altercation, resulting in Dean punching Russell and stomping on his head. Injured, Russell went to the hospital to get stitches. He claims he didn’t lock the front door before leaving.

According to Dean, after the fight he decided to walk to his aunt’s house, where he planned to spend the night. However, he ended up getting lost, so he didn’t end up arriving until two hours later, sometime between 5:00am and 5:30am. Police reports claim no one saw him during this time.

At around 3:00am, Lorena returned to the house to find all the doors locked. As such, she entered the home through a window. She was drunk at the time and doesn’t quite remember if she saw her children asleep in the living room. However, she has stated that she recalls seeing Tannis and Summer before she herself fell asleep on the couch.

DISAPPERANCE:

At some point on the morning on July 6, Tamra’s older brother, Raine, felt her leave the bed they shared. While he doesn’t remember the exact time, he does recall it was starting to get light out.

At 9:00am, Tamra’s grandmother came by for a visit and saw Lorena nursing a hangover. This is around the time Lorena herself awoke, as she had to open the door for her mother. Shortly after this, Summer and Raine left the house to attend a day camp at a nearby community centre.

Tamra was first discovered missing when she didn’t come down for breakfast. Lorena had told one of the children to go wake her up, as they were going out for a walk, but she wasn’t in her bed. After checking nearby playgrounds and contacting friends and relatives, Lorena reported her daughter missing at around 12:15pm that afternoon.

INVESTIGATION:

The search for Tamra grabbed the attention of the entire city and would become the largest and most expensive in Regina’s history. At first, patrol officers checked the neighbourhood to make sure she hadn’t simply wandered away or gone to another house, but after they could find no trace of her, the search intensified. The Regina Police Service set up a command post in the parking lot of a church in the 1900 block of Ottawa Street, and hundreds of volunteers, police and RCMP cadets began the search on foot, horseback and in the air. They scoured streets, yards, neighbourhoods, alleys, manholes and trash cans looking for her and even took the search to a local landfill and to areas outside the city. While clothing and a child’s shoe were discovered, they didn’t belong to Tamra, and overall little trace of the missing girl was uncovered.

Since the initial search, there have been others throughout downtown Regina and around the family home. Lorena signed consent forms allowing investigators to search the house. She also provided them with her DNA. Besides seeing a window that had been broken during the fight between Russell and Dean, they found no signs of forced entry or a struggle.

Police questioned sex offenders in the area. They also obtained surveillance footage from area bars, gas stations, convenience stores and a nearby Greyhound depot.

To help develop a timeline for the night before, investigators brought in the family, including Tamra’s siblings, for questioning. In particular, Dean, Russell and Lorena were under intense scrutiny. At the time, investigators felt they weren’t being completely forthcoming with information and were overall not happy with the gaps and inconsistencies in the version of events they were told. The three denied the allegations and expressed that investigators were focusing too much attention on them and not enough on finding Tamra. To help move the investigation along, they named five people they believed could be suspects, including a pedophile who had befriended Tamra some time before.

A few days after Tamra disappeared, an Amber Alert was issued. There are different reports as to why it took so long for one to happen. Some sources say the Amber Alert system hadn’t yet been implemented in Saskatchewan at the time, while a spokesperson for the Regina Police Service said the circumstances of the disappearance hadn’t met the criteria for an alert.

The disappearance soon made national headlines. While appreciative of all the coverage the case was getting, the family soon grew frustrated with both the media and police due to the way they were being treated. Rumours soon began to spread about what happened to the missing girl. One person said she had been seen at a dollar store with an older woman, while another, which has since been disproved with hospital records, claimed Tamra never existed and had been made up in order to scam money from Social Services. A third rumour, which was spread by business owners in the neighbourhood, claimed detectives were looking for a middle-aged white man named “Rocky” or “Roch”. However, police never confirmed if this was true.

To show support for Tamra and the family, residents would wrap ribbons around trees and leave both teddy bears and angels on the steps of the Keepness house.

On July 13, 2004, a $25,000 reward was issued by the Regina Police Service for information about the case, this after searches for Tamra had been suspended. The case was quickly changed from a missing persons investigation to one that was criminal in nature.

On July 19, 2004, Dean was charged with assault causing bodily harm in relation to the fight he’d had with Russell on the night of Tamra’s disappearance. While he tried to appeal, he was denied and sentenced to nine months. Two days later, Tamra’s siblings were removed from the house by Social Services and placed into foster care. Neither government officials or the police would say if this was related to the case, but the house was once again searched after they left.

Just under a month after Tamra went missing, a vigil for the missing girl was held at the family’s house.

On August 11, 2004, Troy was charged with assaulting Dean with a baseball bat, during which he sustained minor injuries. Troy told investigators that he’d gone over to the house to try and get answers about his daughter’s disappearance.

In September 2004, unsealed search warrants revealed police had evidence to believe Tamra had been abducted, as blood had been found on the floor, on the front porch and on bicycles sitting on the porch.

That same month, investigators searched Muscowpetung First Nation, approximately 60km northeast of Regina. The week-long search involved 30 people from the Regina Police Service, the RCMP, Montreal Lake Cree First Nation, and Search and Rescue Regina. While a reason wasn’t given as to why the search had moved north, it’s believed investigators were trying to establish a connection between Tamra and a burnt-out Volkswagen van found on the reserve. The van had been stolen just 10 blocks from the family home on the night the young girl went missing and a jail guard named Sherry Ann Rose had told police that she and a former inmate had stolen the van, picked up Tamra and dumped her body in a ravine on the reserve. A massive search was conducted, with special attention given to ravines and gullies. The waterways were drained with compression pumps and thoroughly searched, but nothing of interest was found. It was later deemed that remains found in the van did not belong to Tamra, and Sherry Ann Rose confessed to having made the story up in order to get her abusive boyfriend locked up. As a result, she was charged with mischief.

Pasqua First Nation was also searched based on tips from the public and visions from First Nations elders.

A six-person task force was established to investigate leads in the case. It would eventually be pared down to just two detectives.

In December 2004, Walter William Obey of Muscowpetung First Nation was charged with assaulting Sherry Ann Rose. He had also been charged with stealing the van that had been found burnt out on the reserve.

At one point during the investigation, Troy was charged with assaulting a female. He claims the assault occurred due to the stress he’d been enduring as a result of Tamra’s disappearance. He was sentenced to house arrest for the charge.

In June 2005, a new team of investigators were assigned to the investigation. That same month, a memorial march was held to commemorate the one-year anniversary of Tamra’s disappearance. This would be replaced the next year by an annual barbecue.

In October 2005, searchers brought in cadaver dogs to aid in the investigation. They searched around Regina for three days, with a specific focus on the north end of Winnipeg Street, Wascana Lake and Wascana Creek. This would be one of the last major searches for Tamra, as the search would be scaled back in April 2006.

Dean has publicly stated that he feared for his safety during the early days of the investigation because he felt the police and the community believed he played some role in Tamra’s disappearance. This sentiment sometimes resulted in the family member’s safety being put into jeopardy. In one instance, three people jumped Lorena after accusing her of selling her daughter in order to buy drugs, something she has repeatedly denied.

In August 2008, seven officers were assigned to work exclusively on the case.

The reward for information was doubled to $50,000 in June 2014. The increase was approved by the Regina Board of Police Commissioners and it has been renewed every year. The police chief hopes the continuation of the reward will allow the family to see they still care about finding Tamra.

During 2014, a hand-drawn map of Muscowpetung First Nation was uploaded to Reddit, with the user claiming the wells on the reserve contained Tamra’s remains. According to the user, she’d found the map amongst the belongings of a deceased relative and that her grandmother had gotten it from a late aunt who’d drawn it up based on visits to a person in prison. While she didn’t have any firsthand knowledge of the investigation, she recalled her family talking about wells and felt the map might be worth something to the investigation. As for why she shared the map on Reddit instead of contacting the police directly, the user claimed to have previously submitted tips via the RCMP, the Regina Police Service and Regina Crime Stoppers, only to never receive a response.

Upon learning about the map, investigators looked to see if it held any real value. This resulted in a search of the reserve, which was done by the Regina Police Service, members of Tamra’s family and the Fort Qu’Appelle detachment of the RCMP. They looked through over two dozen wells with a special camera, but found no evidence that Tamra had ever been there. While an attempt was made to contact the Reddit user in the hopes of learning more about the map, investigators have said they don’t believe it to be an authentic piece of evidence.

The experience was very upsetting for Tamra’s family. It’s been noted that the search prompted renewed interest in the case.

The family has consulted with psychics, elders and mediums. The police have also been in contact with elders, who told them they’d had visions of a child near rocks, trees and water.

In May 2015, Tamra’s case was one of 122 highlighted by the province of Saskatchewan during Missing Persons Week.

In July 2018, a class action lawsuit was filed against the federal government. Tamra’s case was one of many listed. It claimed the federal government had breached the charter rights of Indigenous families to security and freedom from discrimination, and that numerous negative experiences were had as a result of the alleged mishandling of cases. It also claimed that the RCMP shared a responsibility with the government, given it’s a branch of the federal government. The claimants sought $500 million in damages for the RCMP’s handling of the investigations and $100 million in punitive damages.

In May 2019, the RCMP launched a week-long campaign to bring more attention to 45 missing children in Canada. Tamra’s case was one of the one’s highlighted.

Toward the end of 2019, the Regina Police Service renewed its commitment to solving the case. It’s still an active investigation and is currently in the hands of the Cold Case Unit. Investigators are still reviewing and working on case files, and they continue to regularly receive tips – approximately 16 a year. While no arrests have been made and no evidence found to explain how and why Tamra went missing, it’s believed she is deceased and that foul play was involved. However, full details of the investigation haven’t been released due to the ongoing nature of the case.

Lorena has said she doesn’t like to talk about the early parts of the investigation, given the negative focus that was on the family at the time. She also shares that the numerous rumours took a toll on everyone. She agrees with investigators that someone out there is currently withholding information and, as such, she and the family continue to pursue leads on their own time.

THEORIES:

1) The general theory in the case is that Tamra was abducted by a stranger. Some people think she may have wandered away and been abducted by a driver who was cruising the area at the time, while others cite the home’s location. It’s less than a block from the Oskana Community Correctional Centre, a halfway house for federal parolees, and is located near the Salvation Army’s Waterston House, which is known to shelter former inmates and drug and alcohol users. Some feel that Tamra’s disappearance may have been at the hands of someone staying at either location.

While there are many theories surrounding who could possibly have been involved, Lorena is certain her daughter was taken between 9:00am and 10:20am on July 6, 2004. This is further supported by Raine’s version of events, which state Tamra most likely left the room during early/mid-morning.

2) Some in Regina feel Tamra may have been abducted by someone in the drug trade or potentially sold by her mother in order to pay a cocaine debt. The authorities asked Lorena if her daughter’s disappearance was related to the drug trade in some way and Lorena fiercely denied it.

3) There’s a slight chance Tamra’s disappearance is related to the argument Dean and Lorena had on the night she went missing. However, this is seen as unlikely, as both have said the argument was not about anything major and was simply a small spat between partners.

4) It’s possible her disappearance is the result of an accident. While this line of thinking opens up to many possibilities, one idea brought up theorizes that Tamra may have gotten lost after leaving her home. Possibly scared, she then crawled into somewhere so small that she’s never been found. If this is the case, then it means the young girl has most likely passed away.

5) Some have speculated that Tamra’s unstable home life could have played a role in her disappearance. They feel the evidence for this stance comes from the investigators’ theory that Lorena, Dean and Russell have not been completely forthcoming regarding the events of July 5 and July 6, 2004. However, as aforementioned, all three individuals claims they’ve been completely truthful with those investigating the case.

6) A final theory held by the family involves a drifter that used to stay at the house. Lorena informed police of the woman, whose name is currently unknown, as she used numerous aliases. However, it is known the children called her “Big Auntie”. She is said to have been a sketchy character who frequently lied to Lorena. She had been staying at the house before Tamra’s disappearance, but left after she and Lorena had a falling out. She has not been seen since.

Is it possible she abducted Tamra in revenge, or could she have had another motive for abducting the young girl, if she was indeed involved?

AFTERMATH:

Every year, the community holds a barbecue in Tamra’s honour, just a few blocks from where she disappeared. It’s held by the Regina Treaty and Status Indian Services, and the Regina Police Service sends officers to help serve food. According to the family, they hold it to show everyone they’re still looking for Tamra and to also lend support to other families of missing and murdered Indigenous women. They’ve shared that seeing the amount of people who come out and show support has helped them hold onto the hope that one day she’ll be found. Until that day happens, the barbecue will be held yearly.

Unfortunately, Lorena no longer has any family pictures of Tamra, as someone threw out a large portion of her property a few years ago. The only images she has of her daughter are those featured on the missing persons flyers.

Many of the investigators who initially worked on the case have since retired. However, they are still dedicated to solving the case and say it frequently comes to mind.

Lorena has moved repeatedly since Tamra disappeared, having been evicted numerous times. She spends her days working odd jobs and has shared that she fell into sex work not long after her daughter went missing. Her other children have never been permanently returned to her custody and the three babies she gave birth to after Tamra’s disappearance have since been taken by Social Services.

Tamra’s twin sister, Tannis, is currently in university.

Russell Sheepskin passed away on January 1, 2009. Those investigating the case wonder if he knew any more information that may have been useful in finding Tamra.

Lorena feels hopeful that she’ll one day see her daughter again. She does not think Tamra is dead, despite what investigators have said.

Troy has shared that he tries not to dwell on the case, but that it’s hard not knowing if Tamra is alive or dead. He says he harbours guilt over having lost custody of his children in the years leading up to her disappearance.

CASE CONTACT INFORMATION:

Tamra Jewel Keepness went missing from the 1800 block of Ottawa Street in Regina, Saskatchewan Canada on July 5, 2004. She was five years old, and she while what she was last wearing is unknown, it’s believe she could have had on a light blue striped halter top with pink accents; light blue jeans; and either rubber boots or pink and white shoes. She may have been barefoot. At the time of her disappearance, she stood at 3’5″ and weighed between 35 and 40 pounds. She had bobbed black hair and brown eyes. She has two circle-type birthmarks on her stomach, one dark and the other lighter in colour, and a scar on one of her legs, just below the knee.

Currently, her case is classified as a missing person. If alive, she would be 21 years old.

If you have any information regarding the case, you can contact the Regina Police Service at 306-777-6500. Tips can also be submitted to Child Find at 1-800-387-7962 or anonymously via Regina Crime Stoppers at 1-800-222-8477.

Russell Sheepskin👇🏾

Summer Keepness👇🏾

Troy Keepness👇🏾

Lorena Keepness👇🏾

Tamra Keepness 👇🏾

Raine Keepness👇🏾

Dean McArthur👇🏾

Ellen Keewatin👇🏾

[perfectirishgifts]

The 13 Best Korean Dramas Of 2020

New Post has been published on https://perfectirishgifts.com/the-13-best-korean-dramas-of-2020/

The 13 Best Korean Dramas Of 2020

Bae Suzy and Nam Joo-hyuk partner up in ‘Start-Up.’

Although 2020 will make the history books for all the wrong reasons, it was a great year for Korean dramas. With a slew of big budget hits and small quirky stories, k-dramas offered plenty of innovative entertainment to help viewers happily pass pandemic time.

Every drama viewer may have a different list of favorites, but here are a few 2020 dramas that stood out in terms of originality, subject matter and execution.

Park Seo-joon created one of the year’s most memorable k-drama characters in ‘Itaewon Class.’

Itaewon Class

The year started off with the quirky hit Itaewon Class, in which Park Seo-joon’s character overcomes so many odds that he naturally sympathizes with those who society may shun. When opening a cafe he hires employees that others might not and those choices contribute to his success. Park’s generous character is one of the year’s most likable and the drama also features top-notch performances by Kim Da-mi, Kwon Nara, Yoo Jae-Myung and Ahn Bo-hyun.

Why see it? If you’ve never been to Seoul’s international neighborhood of Itaewon, this drama takes you there. The drama provides plenty of feel-good moments and a great soundtrack, including a contribution by BTS member V.

Kim Hee-ae and Park Hae-joon star in ‘The World of The Married.’

World of the Married

Although this drama has not yet made it to all international audiences, it was a huge hit in Korea, enjoying both critical success and nationwide ratings of 28.37%. World of the Married, an adaptation of the BBC series Dr. Foster, stars Kim Hae-ae. Kim plays a doctor who thinks her life is perfect until she learns that her husband, played by Park Hae-joon, has been cheating on her. Even worse, all their friends know. 

Why see it? Kim won Best Actress at the Baeksang Awards for playing the drama’s protagonist Ji Sun-woo and the drama was a breakout hit for supporting actress Han Seo-hee. There’s also the guilty pleasure of watching a woman scorned exact revenge on those who betrayed her.

The legal drama ‘Hyena’ starred Kim Hye-soo and Ju Ji-hoon.

Hyena

The drama’s leading characters, played by Kim Hye-soo and Ju Ji-hoon, each have their own approach to practicing law. She’s a scrappy small-time lawyer with questionable ethics and he’s a self-satisfied high-profile lawyer at a top firm. Despite their differences—and getting off to a bad start when she scams him—they turn out to be good for each other.

Why see it? Ju delivers a pitch-perfect performance, with his every twitch and grimace creating an unforgettable character.  Ju and Kim have undeniable chemistry that sizzles through episodes of fast-paced high-stakes legal entanglements.

Bae Doona played a zombie-fighting nurse in the second season of ‘Kingom.’

Kingdom 2

The second season of this historical zombie drama was even better than the first. Kingdom 2 also stars Ju Ji-hoon as the prince trying to save his country from a zombie invasion as well as inner court corruption. What makes the second season better than the first is a larger role for actress Bae Doona, whose character takes time out from nursing the sick to battle the undead.

Why see it: It’s a zombie story with a historical and moral twist.

Start Up

Nam Joo-Hyuk and Bae Suzy star in this story of a small tech start-up that gets a chance to compete on a bigger stage. When Bae’s character Seo Dal-mi was young she received encouraging letters from a man named Nam Do-san, but the letters were really written by Kim Seon-ho’s character Han Ji-pyeong. When a grown-up Dal-mi decides to find the real Do-san, played by Nam, Ji-pyeong asks Do-san to pretend he really wrote the letters. Do-san and Dal-mi are perfect for each other but their budding relationship is based on a lie. 

Why see it? The story of how the start-up gets started is interesting. Each of the actors—from the leads to the supporting cast— is imperfectly endearing and Kim wins this year’s unofficial prize for being the most appealing second lead.

Lee jun-ki is a potential serial killer married to the detective played by Moon Chae-won in ‘Flower … [] of Evil.’

Flower of Evil

What would you do if you found out you were married to a serial killer? It might be happening to Moon Chae-won’s police detective character in Flower of Evil. Her devoted husband, played by Lee Jun-ki, has a mysterious past that ties him to a serial killer. Did he also commit murders? If he is a serial killer, does his wife love him enough to look past the incriminating clues?

Why see it? Although some of the drama’s plot occasionally veers into the illogical, the relationship between the leads is so charismatic that the drama acquired a loyal and enthusiastic following. The mystery is sufficiently complex and Lee’s tortured performance as the suspected serial killer is mesmerizing.

Park So-dam played Park Bo-gum’s makeup artist in ‘Record of Youth.’

Record of Youth

Record of Youth features ambitious likable protagonists trying to find their place in a highly competitive world. Park Bo-gum plays a model so charming it’s hard to imagine why he’s not already a success at the story’s start. Park So-dam plays a talented make-up artist with dreams. She’s also a devoted fan of his modeling career.

Why see it? Park Bo-gum’s character is as bright as a shiny penny, ever optimistic and upbeat, despite not having much support for his dreams. Watching Park So-dam act is always a pleasure and the real star of the drama might be Han Jin-hee, who plays Park Bo-gum’s supportive grandfather.

Seo Ye-ji aggressively pursues Kim Soo-hyun in ‘It’s Okay Not To Be Okay.’

It’s Okay Not To Be Okay

Easily the most visually appealing drama of 2020, It’s Okay Not To Be Okay stars two of k-drama’s most photogenic actors Seo Ye-ji and Kim Soo-hyun as a twisted children’s book author and the psychiatric nurse she needs to calm her nightmares. Not only are the actors beautiful, but the drama’s graphics, cinematography and costumes are also gorgeous. 

Why see it? The drama explores the topics of autism and the mental scars created by early trauma. Oh Jung-se’s performance as Kim’s autistic brother was one of the best of the year.

‘The Good Detective’ is a fast-paced crime thriller starring Son Hyun-joo and Jang Seung-jo.

The Good Detective 

The Good Detective delivers a Scandi-noir vibe with its insightful character development plus some over-the-top, superhero police action scenes. The drama stars Son Hyun-joo, who might have the most expressive face of any k-drama actor, and Jang Seung-jo as a detective whose super-power is having a fortune. 

Why see it? The Good Detective is an involving police procedural with top-rate performances. Oh Jung-se plays a hard-hearted villain, a dramatically different role than his vulnerable character in It’s Okay Not To Be Okay.

Nana plays a woman who pursues politics for a paycheck despite Park Sung-hoon’s objections.

Into The Ring 

The wry comedy stars Nana, formerly a member of k-pop group After School, and Park Sung-hoon, who recently played a convincing but comical killer in Psychopath Diary. Nana plays a plucky unemployed woman who runs for office, motivated largely by the paycheck, but also from a sense of justice. Although Park initially finds her irritating, he eventually helps her fight local corruption.

Why see it? Nana is so charismatic in this role, viewers may want to see everything she’s ever done. She and Park develop a low-key lovable comic rapport that keeps a story about local politics happily enjoyable.  

‘My Dangerous Wife’ is a cat-and-mouse mystery within the story of a marriage.

My Dangerous Wife

In this dark comedy Choi Won-young plays a chef who plans to murder his wealthy wife, so he can inherit her money, but when he arrives home with a poisoned bottle of wine he finds she has been kidnapped. The note the kidnappers left behind warns him not to contact the police or they will kill his wife. Should he? It sounds like an opportunity.

Why see it: Interesting plot twists and turns make this drama fascinating to the very last episode. The complex storyline involves a mistress, a mysterious old friend, a detective with a suspicious wife, and a set of curious next door neighbors with secrets of their own.  

Son Ye-jin and Hyun Bin experience an impossible love in ‘Crash Landing On You.’

Crash Landing On You

Crash Landing On You, which first aired in Dec. 2019, successfully introduced a wider international audience to the joys of k-drama viewing. The mega-hit, starring Hyun Bin and Son Ye-jin, follows the story of a South Korean heiress who accidentally lands in North Korea and is helped by a North Korean officer at the risk of his own life.

Why see it? Everything about the drama is top-notch—the cinematography, the romantic storyline and the excellent performances from the lead and supporting actors. The drama also offers some interesting insight into North Korean daily life.

Shin Sung-rok stars in the paranormal thriller ‘Kairos.’

Kairos

Kairos is a tense paranormal thriller about karmic debt. In this drama two people who live in different times stumble on a supernatural way to talk and thus untangle their preventable personal tragedies. Shin Sung-rok plays a callous businessman whose daughter is kidnapped. Lee Se-young plays a woman whose mother disappears. Together they must change fate but they can’t connect in their own time. This plot device was used in the film The Call and the k-drama Signal, but it feels fresh in Kairos, given the carefully crafted moments of suspense and some intriguing performances.

Why see it? Both Shin and supporting actor Ahn Bo Hyun do an excellent job of portraying men who question what they once held sacred. 

Which dramas made your list?

From Hollywood & Entertainment in Perfectirishgifts

[daughterofthehighlands]

This is my first time writing in the PD world, but this story came out of nowhere and demanded to be written (it happens when you fall asleep reading fanfiction guess). It is also un-betaed. This story is also outside of what I normally write, and is a difficult subject.

Trigger warning child trafficking, nothing graphic.

I own nothing.

JHJH

Kim Burgess climbed into the passenger seat of Detective Jay Halstead's truck, as Hailey Upton started the vehicle.

Looking over at the blond, Kim noticed the bloodshot, rimmed eyed and sighed, knowing that this was going to be harder than it already was.

The team had been called in to investigate possible child abuse at a local school.

It turned out that the abuse was actually trafficking of kids in foster care.

They would be assigned to certain families, stay for a few weeks, then disappear from the distict, school officials being told the children were found permanent homes or were placed with family.

They sent Jay in, undercover, as a gym teacher for the 3rd graders, and where there were 6 kids who were in four different homes.

Jay had become a trusted figure to the children when one girl came to him with a story of a 'brother' that had been taken by a stranger at night and not seen again. The little girl then went missing from school, and her foster sister said that that same stranger had taken her.

Adam Ruzek finally found the missing piece; a Jennifer Winslow worked for the adoption services and had links to black market trading of children. She found families that would take the children and then sent one of the thugs to pick up the child. The parents none the wiser of what was going on, since they were sent by Ms. Winslow and had the badge of the adoption agency.

Jay had called Voight, and had told him his suspicions, adding that he was at the home where 9 kids had gone missing from.

When they had arrived, they found Jay's car door open and blood on the seat.

Now, they were in the process of locating the missing children and hoping that Halstead would be found with them.

Fifteen hours had passed, when they finally got a viable lead, and now they were bringing the children home.

JHJH

Jay woke up to a splitting headache, his shoulder killing him and his hands tied behind his back. He heard the sobs of children and slowly took in his surroundings.

They were in a large horse trailer, if the hay and smell was anything to go by, and they were moving.

JHJH

Hailey was so focused on trying to reach her partner, she was barely paying attention to the tractor in front of them.

"Hailey! Look out!" Kim yelled, reaching for the handle above the door and bracing herself against the dash.

Hailey slammed on the breaks, the bumper of Jay's truck millimeters from the back tire of the truck in front of them. Traffic at a standstill, due to the roadblock that had been set up to check all tractor/ trailers, RVs and other vehicles that could be transporting the children.

Kim looked over at the blond, "That was close. Do you want me to drive?"

Wordlessly, Hailey nodded, both getting out, and switching spaces.

JHJH

Detective Hank Voight looked at the map in front of him that set on the hood of a patrol car and studied it. He looked up as Al stepped next to him, "You got anything?"

Al nodded, "Winslow said that she uses her brother's ranch as a way to smuggle the kids out. She said that they borrow a truck and horse trailer to move them to another location." He pointed at the map, "She also said that they are using this road today and that her brother is innocent."

"Get people over to the ranch, see what truck is missing and if they have the tag number. Same for the trailer. We bring those kids home. TODAY!"

Al nodded once and disappeared into the crowd of officers.

So, I'm not very good at knowing the inside of horse trailers, but this is kind of what I envisioned for it to look like, especially for what I needed to take place.

Fanfiction at it's (not so) finest

And Part 2

Jay fought to stay awake, but it was hard. His shoulder hadn't quit bleeding and his head was pounding. But he had to get these kids somewhere safe, he just didnt know how. Then he saw Kelsey Jennings and hoped she could help.

"Kelsey? Can you help me out? You k ow how you untied those knots at school for that project?"

The eight year old nodded, "Do you think you can untie my hands?"

Again, the little redhead nodded and went to work.

JHJH

Voight sighed as he looked at the passing signs. If there was one thing he knew, it was that they had to stop the truck before it reached the interstate, or those children would be lost, possibly forever.

And they were running out of time. Hailey and Kim were stuck in a road block, unable to move.

Atwater and Ruzek were coming from the opposite direction.

And he and Al were speeding down a back road towards the turn off they were informed would be used.

JHJH

Jay sighed when he hands were freed, and nodded to Kelsey, "Thank you, Kelsey. Steven, come here, please."

Steven was the oldest boy and Kelsy the oldest girl. He was going to need them both, if his plan was to work. Luckily, there was no loose equipment in the trailer, and the windows were cracked to allow them fresh air.

The children were soon all tied as safely to the walls as they could be. If the trailer tipped, they would not be thrown all over the trailer, but would be bounced around in place. Sore and bruised, but hopefully no broken bones, and not possibly thrown out of a window if one busted.

With one more look back at the children, and a smile that showed more confidence than he felt, Detective Jay Halstead went to work on freeing the children.

JHJH

Kim and Hailey finally made their way around the block and started down the side road they were told about. They had been driving for a while when they came upon a horse trailer parked across the road at an angle.

Throwing the truck in park, the jumped out and pulled their side arms.

Hoping that the children were okay and Jay was taking care of them.

That all went out the window when they opened the doors and the children were the only ones available.

Quickly untying them and ushering them outside, Steven and Kelsey told the two women what had happened.

JHJH

"Voight," the sergeant said, answering his phone, "Thanks, Haliey."

Without being told, Al stepped on the gas, neatly passing another vehicle.

"Jay got the children out, but isn't with them. One of the kids said he climbed out the emergency hatch on top and found a way to release the trailer from the truck. Other than some bruising, the kids are all fine."

Al nodded. Their boy was in trouble and he was going to make sure they were there to help him. And as they came around, yet another curve, they saw a truck turned over and no movement.

JHJH

Jay watched at the trailer disconnected and swerved before coming to a complete stop at an angle. He sighed in relief, knowing that the kids were fine, since it didnt tip.

The truck sped faster after the trailer was removed, and that was when he could just barely pick up the sounds of a police scanner.

His team had been made and these guys were going to try and escape the consequences of kidnapping.

He wasn't going to allow it.

And, apparently, the kidnappers weren't going to go down easy. The driver started to swerve and the old road, being uneven, cause them to over correct and the truck to flip.

Jay jumped and rolled as he hit the ground, when he realized what was happening, but still felt the discomfort of drawing in breath, and the cracked ribs that caused it.

Seeing the two men get out of the truck, Jay started towards them. One fell to the ground, halfway out of the vehicle, and didn't move again.

The other saw the detective and attacked.

The fight was over in a matter of minutes, both me on the ground, one with his neck broke, the other with multiple stab wounds and a knife in their chest.

JHJH

Al and Voight ran to the scene and briefly paused.

A man lay halfway out of the over turned truck, clearly dead, unseeing eyes looking up at the cold December sky.

A second perp was laying on the ground, neck at a weird angle, staring at Jay Halstead, who was clearly trying to stay awake.

Voight knelt by Jay and turned his face to look at him, "Hey, kid. You with me?"

Jay tried to focus on the hands that touched him, at first trying to fight them, until his wrists were caught in warm, calloused hands. Hands that were comforting, and the voice was familiar, safe.

Al held Jay's wrists, gently, but firmly, seeing the abrasions on them, but trying to keep him from giving Voight another black eye.

Hank still spoke calmly to the kid, never moving his hand from Jay's face, while Al tried to access the injuries that covered the detective. Both feeling the heat rolling off of Halstead, and worried about what injuries were hidden by the jacket he wore.

"Hank," Olinsky spoke quietly, "he's been shot in the shoulder, has a knife wound in the side, wrists are a mess and then the knife in his chest."

Jay finally got a clear look of the person over him, "Voight, don... wanna die ...lone," it was whispered, paper thin and barely eligible, but the best thing either officer had heard.

Until the younger man started to pass out, "Jay? Halstead! Stay with me, kid! That's an order! Jay!"

JHJH

Dr. Will Halstead stood in the breakroom of Chicago Med and scrubbed his hand down his face, clearing the tears.

Sgt. Hank Voight walked in as Will's fist went through the wall, "I don't think Ms. Goodwin is going to be happy about that."

Will huffed out a laugh, "Probably not. They lost him twice, Hank."

The cop sighed, hands going into his pockets, "I know, kid, I know."

"Connor is doing everything he can. Said it'll take hours to fix the artery the knife was in."

The doctor sat on the couch, leaning forward, head between his hands, "I was worried when he went overseas. Afraid he wouldn't come home. Then he became a cop. And a good one. He's all I have left, and I don't know,-"

Voight sat by him and put his hand on his shoulder, "And you won't ever have to find out, Will. He's the strongest person I know, and we are going to be there for him."

After a moment's thought, he continued, "Plus, he has to take my place as lead over Intelligence, when that time comes. I think I he will take it far beyond what I could ever could. And he will do well. But don't you tell him I said that. I'll deny it."

Will choked out a laugh, and looked at the hole he had put in the wall, "You think she'll notice?"

Sharon Goodwin walked in, "Will, Jay is out of surgery. They'll be moving him to SICU once he is out of recovery. I thought you might want to go up to the waiting room so you'll be there when he gets moved."

Will stood, as did Voight, "Thank you. We'll go there now."

As she went to leave, she spoke again, not bothering to turn, "And Will? Make sure you patch that wall. And don't put a picture in front of it, either. Egg shell paint is what we used in here."

Voight slightly smiled, "Yep. She'll notice."

JHJH

The return to consciousness isn't what isn't seems like in the movies. You don't wake up immediately and go on about your daily life. You don't hold conversations for several minutes either.

No, it's so much slower.

You hear things around you, but it doesn't automatically click what it is. You may try to wake up, but you pretty much are out of it for quite a while.

The same went for Jay, the first several times he tried to wake up. But one thing that he could count on, was knowing his big brother was there. He could feel him, may not physically, but he knew.

And when he finally did wake up, several hours later, it was dark outside, and snow was falling, the lights outside making it glitter and shine.

Will was beside him, asleep, his hand on Jay's arm, comforting and familiar.

He must have made a sound of some sort, because the next thing his groggy mind knew, a hand was on his face and his name was being called.

His eyes rolled about, trying to focus, and finally finding his boss at his side.

"You're going to be okay, kid. We're here for you."

And with that, Detective Jay Halstead of Chicago PD's Intelligence Unit fell into a deep, peaceful and healing sleep, knowing that he was safe and he wasn't alone.

JHJH

I figured this was the best place to end it. After having a brief dream of him being in a horse trailer with young kids, (kids not much younger than my oldest) this story was born.

There are some very nice horse trailers out there, some with an air conditioned kitchenette and/ or sleeping area.

Yes, I had to come up with a way for the kids to be rescued, and I know it probably isn't possible to release such a heavy trailer while it is moving, but hey, fanfiction right?

And thank you to everyone who has written their favorite comfort bits and pieces on Tumblr. That helped me so much when I was trying to end this story, but wanting to show the comfort as well.

This story has been posted on fanfiction. net and Tumblr. Tha k you to everyone who has commented and followed. It means so much to me.

I own nothing

[excorcismic]

ALRIGHT SO HERE’S THE DEAL ; if misa is my first favorite death note character , this angy kid right here is my second - i adore mello to pieces and he’s very close to misa in terms of how much i love him , but ultimately does she remain queen . but ! the cool thing is that in the series they never actually interact ( the closest being mello spying on her for a brief period of time ) which means i could play my two blonde fashion icons and voila , here they are . so here’s the gist on mello in canon & alucard and most importantly the plots i am digging bc my muse for him rn ?? is off the charts . LESGO !

IN A CANON NUTSHELL ( HUGE DEATH NOTE SPOILERS ) : So Mello’s introduced during the latter half of Death Note ( or maybe it’s more the final third but either way there’s a part where it significantly breaks in two ) - or , the very end of the first half , takes center stage during the second . He’s from the original home of the detective L , an orphanage of gifted children known as Whammy’s House - and essentially , the goal of the children is to maybe one day live up to L , one person taking his place . Mello !! Is one of the candidates . But he has a permanent chip on his shoulder since Near - the other candidate - always managed to beat him at everything . So when Light Yagami gets his way & L dies , Near and Mello are told that L didn’t choose a successor between them . When the idea that they work together to do just that is brought up , Near ( who honestly really liked Mello ) is like ‘hey! let’s do it’ and Mello ( still angy that Near is always right in front of him ) is like ‘FUCK you I’m gonna catch Kira myself’ and leaves the orphanage . Five years later , he works with the mafia , even getting his hands on a Death Note & with the help of a shinigami ( that he scared the living piss out of ) concludes that a rule that states a human will die if they haven’t written in the notebook in thirteen days is fake . He also like , blackmails the president and orchestrates an explosion that Soichiro Yagami dies after but he gets a wicked ass scar afterwards so it’s okay . Now working with L’s third potential successor , Matt , he spies on Misa Amane and makes connections between the second L ( Light Yagami ) & Kira , deduces that Kiyomi Takada is an accomplice , and kidnaps her to try and expose Kira as Light Yagami - but . . . he dies in the process , and so does Matt . The cool thing is though his discoveries led to Near’s breakthrough in the Kira case ( as he and Near met one last time , where he gives Mello the photo he has here in Alucard ) and Mello kind of gets the last laugh post-mortem . And also a kind of neat thing , his last appearance is as the narrator in the Death Note prequel , the Los Angeles BB murder cases - I’m gonna quote the whole thing in my eventual intro but ! It’s an awesome book and Mello is an awesome narrator . ( dn spoilers end here tyvm )

IN AN ALUCARD NUTSHELL - So Mihael Keehl ( his real name in canon , mind you ) is a twenty year-old runaway from the foster system - also sometimes lived in an orphanage but when he wasn’t , the constant tossing around because of his rebellious tendencies wrecked him . He isn’t employed , not does he actually have an actual home - living in a beat down truck most of the time if he can’t get a motel / hotel room for a night or a few . He makes basic expenses and fills his basic needs by doing odd jobs in exchange for money or favors - stuff like ‘if I do this for you for x amount of days or I get this for you you’ll pay for my phone bill for the next two months’ and that stuff . Basic arrangements . And he knows he can like , maybe try to commit to a job or a home but he’s actually . . . way too fucking scared of being tied down or in a worse situation that’s somehow more stable so the nomad life is kind of what he sticks with . But he’s homeless & it’s not good for him . At all . He’ll never flat-out admit that though which is why he calls himself a drifter . His main reason for being on his own , and refusing any extensive help from anyone outside of these favors , is because he has a point to prove - because that inferiority complex kicks in because the other kids he grew up against are doing amazing things and he wants to do better , and not receive any large amount of help . He just ,,, doesn’t understand he’s not doin’ any good for himself .

BUT OOOOOOOH YOU WANNA PLOT WITH MELLO SO BAD OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

so the biggest connection in the sense that it’s the most open , i mentioned that mello mainly pays for his own expenses ( or more so , gets other people to pay for them ) by doing favors or small jobs in exchange for either money or other forms of payment . so obviously , people he has these arrangements with - they can range from anything , mello is extremely smart ( a thing that comes up is that he has a shit ton of wasted potential ) in the books , technology , the streets and has a bunch of small talents he’s picked up over the years of living on his own ( saving money , sewing and mending / caring for clothes how else is he gonna keep that amazing fashion , cooking with very little ingredients , cleaning with little tools , fixing the kinks / souping up automobiles , ahem sexual stuff , tutoring , sometimes even mild illegal shit , you name it . ) so he can offer these talents / skills / etc . to other people who could use them ( most of the time repeatedly ) and in exchange , the other muses will pay him in cash or by doing things like paying his phone bill , car insurance , health insurance , food / groceries , hotel/motel room for a few nights , or even just offering him a place to use the shower or bathroom or even a bed for certain days of the week . This can also lead to many of the other plots I have listed here in the sense it’s a start , and it can happen with anyone , anywhere , for any reason .

literally the thing w/ mel is that he knows no limits and will do anything for anyone and is hardheaded as fuck about it because he’s got a point to prove and things to do and he won’t waste time refusing but the moment you offer your help in exchange for nothing or you’re trying to hold his hand a little too much and he catches on , the arrangement’s over and you’ll be lucky to see him again .

okay so uh . in that sense ?? maybe ppl who kind of helped him out and he did like . one thing for them and once he got his payment for that one thing he kinda bounced n they never heard from him again for whatever reason . nothing against them but he rly isn’t gonna make a habit of staying in one place for too long . 

obviously , those people that really think he’s gotta give up the ghost of trying to survive like this bc it’s wearing on his health & he doesn’t wanna admit it . and he’s tried shaking them off but he won’t leave and sometimes he’s forced to give into the help they offer but tries making them take a payment back .

old peers that felt whatever way about him back then but feel pity for his wasted potential ( at the moment ) , bc this dude was like . . . a straight-a student and was rly good at a bunch of things and now he’s living the way he is . whatever they wanna do and however they felt about him and how he interacted with them back then Differs but . there’s kind of like ‘damn u live like this’ now . gimme some kids who had crushes on him , kids he was rivals with , kids he got into fights with and maybe socked in the jaw a few times , kids who always admired him , kids who hated his guts - it always comes down to what life is like now vs. what life was like then .

i’d like some friends who were formed from the favors - and maybe they’ve stopped whatever they had with him but they still regularly hang out or something , maybe offer a place to stay for the night . 

just in general ?? people who keep their home open for him and whether he takes them up on their offer on a rare basis .

pls some folks trick him into accepting their help like leave him basket of chocolate candy and trap him or something like just . make it ‘wait what’ deal bc they all know he’s stubborn .

also uh . he’s been arrested for minor offenses a few times so some ppl who’ve bailed him out pls and he’s tryna repay him back .

mentor figures . mentor figures pls he’s trying not to accept their mentor-y guidance from .

so maybe the hero  . . . maybe the one person who was like the l to mello of alucard ( maybe even the Man himself ) that he just . looked up to forever and probably still does .

. . . favor idea ?? maybe he’s a stand-in boyfriend or date for events or somethin’ like mello kinda has that bad boy reputation but maybe he dated them for show on their whim at some point or they have that kinda thing ‘pls pretend to my boyfriend and i’ll let u use my shower every weekend for the next month’ or so .

also , one night stands or friends with benefits he uses only for the bathroom / a place to sleep . folks he’s dated for a period bc he did feel something and therefore he had them as an outlet but then broke up with them ( most likely ?? he was the one who ended it bc he has never known love stability & got spooked on it ending and just - did it on his own accord before he could further get hurt BUT THAT NEVER WORKS and he has hella commitement issues ) and tried to shrug it off as ‘ just another fling ’ even tho he’s highkey sad over it . ppl he’s slept with and then disappears with only a ‘thank you’ note as the evidence he was there . and do they accept it ?? are they pissed over it ?? that is up to You but it’s probably gotten around that mihael keehl has never had a stable relationship and never , ever stays . 

lots of ppl he probs has the above two arrangements or scenarios with bc again , gotta get shit done somehow .

enemies . . . he has an endless grudge with for some reason like maybe they screwed him over , 

i want . . . folks he can eventually get soft with and maybe actually seek that comfort in even tho u gotta chip at the five thousand concrete walls to get to that stage . i want to see him become better and that’s an ultimate goal for him in alucard ( even though it’s gonna be a bit more difficult with his memories returning ) to get better , commit to something , accept stability and get his life on a better track .

and yes , that includes an eventual ship ! really it can build off of any of these dynamics just . give me sneaking in through windows late at night , soft words and gentle kisses and protective hugs and please stay i know you never stay but please stay with me and the thought that maybe he should leave but he doesn’t and they wake up with him after a night and he’s still there and maybe there’s a scare he left like he always does but he made chocolate chip pancakes and he feels safe & alright which is . . . a rare occasion in his messy ass life . maybe something like friends to lovers , fwb to lovers , an old flame , anything this could be fun to do !! end goal though , i’d like something on the softer side that’s healthy and loving because that’s really what he needs . 

( some notes tho bc he’s only twenty i’ll sayyyy max i’ll do the more romantic / spicier stuff with in that aspect is . . . 23 - 24 ?? bc he’s almost 21 like if we put the fact we’re in october into account and his birthday is december 13th that isn’t too far away so . That’s That . he’s also pan as fuck . )

BUT , yes . the main connections / plots there are what i can think of . ik a lot of these are so wordy and i’m sorry bt as always ! i will take literally anything i love plots and i think with what i have for mello there is so much potential in what we can do here .

and as always . give me other death note characters . near or matt specifically would fucking make me cry and i’m here for it .

[whatthef0ucault-addendums]

Its In Making Decisions That We Learn To Decide Character Summaries

Story Link:

In This Family We Punch Nazis part 2

Henry Cardenas

Origin/Fandom: The Ascent (2016) 

Background: Henry Cardenas was born and raised in Mexico where he met the love of his life in his teens and married her out of high school. He came to the United States for work and sent money home until his wife could join him 2 years later. They worked many odd jobs together and tried to conceive for a few years until they had a son. They were never able to have another child, but they were grateful and happy for the family they had. When their son got older and started reading advanced books, he started talking about revolution, systemic oppression, and other topics that scared Henry to the point of making him angry. In his attempts to control his son, he ran away at 14, and joined a gang that he said ‘understood the cause’. He was killed by police officers after turning 18. In his mourning, Henry had to find some kind of meaning out of his son’s death. He decided to go into the police force so he could look out for his community, especially the young teens of color who ended up homeless or who ran away, and to try to prevent other senseless tragedies from occurring in the future. Henry and his wife decided to adopt, formally or informally, different teens Henry would come across at work who were in desperate need of help.

Relationship To MC: Henry, along with Chuck and Jester, find Diego and offer him an opportunity to make money in the underground fighting scene. 

Relationship to other characters: Henry is the biological father of Pedro, formal adoptive father of Jester and Gabriela, informal adoptive father of Chuck and Vince, and foster father to Lucas and Miguel. 

Susanna Hernandez Cardenas

Origin/Fandom: El Chicano (2018)

Background: Susanna Hernandez was born to a large, loving, but poor family and raised in Mexico. She met Henry in high school and fell in love with his kindness, dedication, and respect for her, marrying him after graduation with her father’s blessing. Being told of the ‘American Dream’ through various cultural and media references, she shared his aspirational dreams of making a better life in the United States. She waited and worked her own jobs for 2 years before she came to join him. She was only able to ever conceive and carry one son, suffering from fertility issues. She devoted her life to raising him and being the best mother she could be, though she could not stop him when he wanted to run away from home. She was devastated when her son was killed ‘by accident’ in an act of police brutality, never fully recovering. Still, being a mother was her passion and life’s work, and she came up with the idea of adopting teens of color in need with her husband who might be particularly vulnerable to experiencing the same kind of senseless violence. Her protective streak ran a mile wide alongside her kindness and devotion to her children.

Relationship To MC: Susanna hears many different stories about Diego, but finally meets him in person just after his 20th birthday and during the week leading up to Dia De Los Muertos. 

Relationship to other characters: Susanna is the biological mother of Pedro, formal adoptive mother of Jester and Gabriella, informal adoptive mother of Chuck and Vince, and foster mother to Lucas and Miguel. 

Detective Chuck Beaman

Origin/Fandom: The Umbrella Academy (Season 1/?)

Background: Chuck was born to a Latina mother and African American father, both in their late teens. The couple believed they were head-over-heels in love, and lived as such until Chuck was four when things started to change. Chuck was too young to remember, but both of his parents struggled with drug addictions and were unable to provide a safe, consistent home for him. This often resulted in Chuck having to fend for himself, or when he was a bit older, having to take on the roles of cooking and cleaning and taking care of his younger siblings. When he was 10, he and his siblings were taken from their home and put into separate homes in the foster care system. Chuck started to get into trouble not long after that, becoming a behavioral problem and refusing to cooperate with any of his social workers or foster parents. Most of those parents proved to be neglectful or physically abusive. Chuck would start to form bonds with his foster siblings and attempt to protect them like he attempted to protect his own. Henry came upon Chuck as a police escort during another foster-home change, and quickly connected with him. Due to Chuck’s mother still having some custody rights, Henry and his wife were unable to adopt him, but Henry personally looked out for him and aided him in learning how to become emancipated at 16. 

Relationship To MC: Chuck and Jester discover young Diego on the streets and see him fight off a whole group of skinheads by himself. They, along with Henry, offer him a chance for a different life. Chuck is about 7 years older than Diego. Chuck eventually becomes Detective Beaman. 

Relationship to other characters: Chuck is the oldest “child” of Henry and his wife after being shuffled through foster homes as a young teen. Henry helped Chuck gain emancipation, and then welcomed him unofficially into his family as his own son. 

”Jester” Cardenas

Origin/Fandom: We Die Young (2019)

Background: Jester was found on the streets by Henry when he was 12 after he had gained a reputation for stealing food, clothing, or other essentials from different local stores. Although he was born in America, his parents had been undocumented, and both were deported suddenly one day to their home country of El Salvador. Jester refused to go into the foster system after he wasn’t allowed to be deported with them, and ran away instead to try to make it on his own. Henry picked up on the kid’s patterns of stealing, and knew he wasn’t dealing with a typical teenage delinquent. He was able to approach him with compassion when he finally found him, and felt compelled to adopt him when he and his wife heard his story. Jester refused to go by his birth name, and adopted the name Jester due to his off-beat nature that often resulted in either humorous jokes, or unorthodox fighting styles, sometimes at the same time.

Relationship to MC: Jester, along with Chuck and Henry, discover Diego’s significant fighting skills after watching him take on a group of skinheads alone. He picks a fight with Diego to further test those skills, before he loses and Diego is offered a chance to become an underground fighter. Jester is about a year older than Diego.

Relationship to other characters: Jester is the biological cousin of Gabriella who is two years older. They are technically siblings by adoption. He is one of a few officially adopted children of Henry and his wife. 

Gabriela Cardenas

Origin/Fandom: We Die Young (2019)

Background: Gabriela, along with her parents, was originally from El Salvador. She was born with Spina Bifida and required extensive special care in the first few years of her life. This prompted her parents (along with Jester’s) to move to the US both for better medical care for her and for a bigger community of support from other relatives who had already immigrated. Her parents were hardworking, but spent most of their money on Gabriela’s medical care as she grew up. When they had to renew their permanent resident cards, they only had enough money to renew Gabriela's, forcing them to let their own lapse. They made plans to save money to reinstate their documents, but never got the chance, as they were deported at the same time as Jester’s parents. Gabriela was 14 at the time, and went into the foster care system. She was chosen by Henry and his wife due to her special needs and emergency situation, eventually becoming officially adopted by them like Jester. 

Relationship to MC: Diego meets Gabriela when he first meets Eudora at a night club just shy of Diego’s 20th Birthday. She is about 3 years older than Diego. 

Relationship to other characters: Gabriela is Jester’s biological cousin, although she is not as close with him as she is with Chuck. She is also childhood best friends with Detective Eudora Patch.

Vincent Marins

Origin/Fandom: The Ascent (2017)

Background: Vince’s background was a bit of a mystery given how he choose to share it at any given time. He liked to go on long rambling stories of different points of his past that might make someone skeptical or laugh until they can’t stand it. It was difficult to tell when he was being serious, and how he felt about a given situation. However, he was also prone to random moments of pure, unfiltered honesty. He was tri-lingual, speaking Spanish, Portuguese, and English fluently and seemed to know a slew of phrases and words from other languages as well. What was known for sure was that Vince was transferred to Henry and his wife’s care through the foster system just shy of his 16th birthday, and disappeared for a year once he turned 18. He returned with some new sets of skills and a few bad habits, but he still remained loyal to the most steady family he’s ever had, sometimes even to a fault. 

Relationship to MC: Vince meets Diego with a group of men associated with the family on the way to Diego’s first underground fight. 

Relationship to other characters: Vince is a former foster child of Henry and his wife who never got to be officially adopted as he aged out of the system too quickly. He also meets Klaus on the streets. He is about 4 years older than Diego. 

Pedro Cardenas (deceased)

Origin/Fandom: El Chicano (2018)

Background: Pedro Cardenas was born in the United States to Henry and Susanna Cardenas. He grew up as an only child due to his parents struggle with conceiving a child. Their family didn’t have a lot of money, though his parents do everything they can to make sure he never goes without the necessities. Pedro grows up watching their struggle with getting access to better jobs, being subjected to discrimination with his parents or with his peers at school, and always having questions about why. He was also considered gifted by his teachers at school, and encouraged to read and study at higher levels that the rest of his peers. Pedro stumbles upon different revolutionary works, philosophies, and concepts in the same library he spent a lot of his youth’s free time. He learns, to the best of his young ability, about systemic racism and discrimination, and wants to change the world with the ideas of revolution. Anytime he brought up the ideas to his father, he would become significantly angry, and pushed Pedro away more and more until he runs away from home at 14 to find those who believed the same as him. Pedro became involved in gang activity and activism, and any extra money he acquired, he sent home to his parents. He was killed by police at 18.  

Relationship To MC: Diego never meets Pedro in person before he dies, instead first seeing his alter in the family home when he meets Susanna, Lucas, and Manny for the first time.

Relationship to other characters: Pedro is the deceased biological son of Susanna and Henry.

Lucas 

Origin/Fandom: We Die Young (2019)

Background:  Lucas is born and raised in the US. His mother dies shortly after Miguel is born, and their father abandons them not long after that. When their older brother is old enough, he takes them out of foster care to help raise them on his own. Their old brother dies after going into the army to bring in more money and resources for the family, and Lucas and Miguel end up in foster care again. Luckily, this time they ended up in a loving family with Henry and Susanna.

Relationship To MC: Diego meets Lucas in preparation for Día De Los Muertos celebrations. Lucas is 6 years younger than Diego.

Relationship to other characters: Lucas is the biological brother of Miguel, and foster brother to the rest of the ‘siblings.’ He has been in Henry and Susanna’s care for about two years when Diego meets them. 

Miguel

Origin/Fandom: We Die Young (2019)

Background:  Miguel is born and raised in the US. His mother dies shortly after he is born, and their father abandons them not long after that. When their older brother is old enough, he takes them out of foster care to help raise them on his own. Their old brother dies after going into the army to bring in more money and resources for the family, and Miguel and Lucas end up in foster care again. Luckily, this time they ended up in a loving family with Henry and Susanna.

Relationship To MC: Diego meets Miguel in preparation for Día De Los Muertos celebrations. Miguel is 10 years younger than Diego.

Relationship to other characters: Miguel is the biological brother of Lucas, and the youngest foster brother to the rest of the ‘siblings.’ He has been in Henry and Susanna’s care for about two years when Diego meets them. 

[gray-autumn-sky]

Sleepless in Seattle, Chapter 11

May 28, 1993- Seattle, Washington:

He’d had the talk with Emma, and she’d easily admitted that she was okay with keeping things casual. She liked him and she enjoyed his company, but she didn’t want to get in too deep or disrupt his life or put labels on things and try to fit into some traditional role that didn’t really work for either of them.

So he decided that if she was okay with the way things were, so was he.

Or he could be.

Or should be.

But when it came down to it, he wasn’t.

This wasn’t the sort of relationship that he wanted.

He wanted someone who would curl up on the couch with him and Roland and spend an entire day watch The Great Mouse Detective, The Little Mermaid, and The Rescuers Down Under. He wanted someone who would go to Roland’s Cub Scouts activities with him and tell him that giving junk food to children wasn't good idea no matter what Roland said, and would replace pizza rolls with apples and peanut butter. He wanted someone who’d come to him, who’d involve his son on their dates, and someone who wanted to be a mother. He wanted someone who’d fight with him, someone who stood her ground, and someone who he’d have passionate makeup with. He wanted someone who could offer him more, someone he could build a future, someone who would make him fall in love all over again.

Emma had helped him to rediscover parts of himself that he’d forgotten about, and for that, he’d always be grateful--and though it seems cliche and the sort of line you’d give without actually meaning it to soften the blow of a break up, he genuinely hoped they could still be friends.

Now, he just had to figure out a way to tell Emma.

And now that he’d come to this realization, he needed to do it sooner rather than later.

Drawing in a breath, he reaches for the the phone, slowly dragging his fingers through the dial as he tries to figure out what to say--and all he manages to decide doing this over this over the phone probably isn’t his best option.

But, of course, it’s ringing and it’s too late to hang up, so he decides to ask her out for lunch--and then he’ll her over pizza. Nodding, he decides that’s a much better plan, and holds his breath waiting for her to pick up--and for brief moment, he thinks she won’t.

“Hello?” she asks, picking out the phone and sounding both irritated and out of breath.

“Hey, Emma. It’s me… it’s Robin.”

“Oh. Hi.”

“I was going to ask if you wanted to grab lunch, but it sounds like I’ve interrupted something.”

“No, no. You haven’t, and an hour ago I would have had plans, but not I don’t.”

His brow furrows. “Oh…”

“My car died. So, I’m stuck here.”

“Oh, were you… going somewhere?” He asks, trying to remember if she mentioned something to him and coming up blank. “Or do you need to be going somewhere?”

“The airport,” she says briskly, still sounding annoyed. “In, like, an hour.”

“Did you… call a cab?”

“Yes! Of course, I did. He never showed.”

“Oh. That’s...that’s weird.”

She sighs. “He was having trouble understanding me. We had a bad connection or something. He probably went to the wrong address and now someone else has my cab.”

Robin’s brow furrows. “Well… I could take you, I suppose,” he says, glancing toward the stairs. “Or well, Roland and I could.”

There’s a long pause, and for a second, it seems like she’s searching for a reason to say no--but then, she offers a tentative-sounding okay and asks if he could get her there by the time her flight takes off--and though he doesn’t have an answer for that, he says he’ll try.

He gets to Emma’s in record time and somehow, miraculously, he gets her to the airport in time.

On the way there, Emma explains that she’s meeting some friends she grew up with, kids who were in and out of foster care, like her, and kids she lived with through her teenage years at a group home. They were the closest thing to family she had, and though she wanted to see them, seeing them always set her on edge a bit.

She left it at that, not explaining anymore, and he could only assume she was on edge because seeing them reminded her of everything she lost and everything she didn’t have. But he didn’t press, he just listened and nodded, and every now and then, glanced in the rearview mirror to check on Roland who never once looked up from his gameboy.

When they reach the gate they exchange hasty goodbye and quickly, without a kiss or a hug, Emma turns and follows the crowd to board. He sighs and looks to Roland who giggles and makes a face. Robin rolls his eyes and drapes his arm around his son’s shoulders, turning him away from the gate and suggesting they grab some chili fries from the food court before heading home--and that’s when he notices her.

He stops dead in his tracks as he watches a woman with shoulder length dark brown hair step into the gate. She has a little boy with her and she’s rummaging through her purse. The little boy says something to her and she looks up at him, laughing--and from where he’s standing, he can hear it, soft and musical--and beautiful as her laugh is, it doesn't compare to the smile that accompanies it.

“Dad, the fries,” Roland whines, tugging on his hand and forcing him to take a step back. “Come on.”

“I just--”

“Dad!”

“One second,” he says, tightening his hold on Roland’s hand as he takes a step forward--and then, before he can take another, a man approaches her, carrying a bouquet of flowers. He slips a hand around her and presses a kiss to her cheek and as she accepts the bouquet, the light catches the stone on her ring--and though it’s completely irrational, he can’t help but feel disappointed.

“Dad! The fries! I’m starving!”

With a sigh, he looks to Roland at his side. “You aren’t starving.”

“Yes, I am.”

“You’re hungry, not starving.”

“Same difference.”

“No,” he sighs, looking up to steal one more glimpse of the woman at the gate--and again disappointment washes over him when he finds she’s already disappeared into the crowd.

“Daaaad--”

“Okay, okay,” he says, turning back to Roland scooping him up, lifting him onto his shoulders. “Let’s get those fries.”

“Can we get cheese on them, too?”

“Brilliant.”

“And eat them while we watch the planes take off?”

“Even better,” he says, taking one last glimpse into the crowd and searching for her--and feeling one last wave of disappointment washes over him when he realizes that she’s really gone.

____

May 28, 1993- Somewhere above Washington State and Seattle, Washington:

Regina rings her hands nervously as she looks to Henry, watching as he stares out the window, trying to catch his first glimpse of Seattle, and she reminds herself that this trip to Seattle will be totally and completely different from the last.

She’ll be sure of it.

In the nearly two months since her last visit, she had done her best to forget everything about it, including Sleepless in Seattle.

But now that she was on a plane descending into the city of Seattle, suddenly, he was all she could think about--the way he lifted his son onto his shoulder, the way he smiled and laughed as the boy threw the fish back into the water, the way his shirt tightened subtly around his arms.

And that feeling of guilt that she’d lived with since she heard Doctor Hopper’s show on Christmas came rushing back, and she didn’t know how to stop it.

Taking a breath, she nudges Henry, grinning when he looks over at her. “Do you need some gum?”

“I’m good?”

“Are you sure? Once we start dropping down toward the runway, your ears might pop.”

Henry considers it. “What flavor?”

“Spearmint and regular mint.”

“Regular mint,” Henry says, holding out his hand. “Just in case.”

Grinning she hands Henry a stick of gum, watching as he fumbles with the wrapper. “So, what do you want to do when we get to Seattle?”

“Will we have time to do stuff? We’ll only be here like two days.”

“Well, while Daniel’s working, you and I have all that time to ourselves to go sightseeing.”

Henry nods, considering it. “Well, I wanna see the Space Needle,” he says. “And Daniel said I’m not supposed to tell you but he got us tickets to the Mariners game.” A guilty little grin stretches over Henry’s lips as he shoves the gum into his mouth. “So, I guess I wanna do that, too.”

Regina’s eyes narrow. “It’s a secret?”

“Yeah. He got tickets from somebody.”

“Oh--”

“And you’re really excited?” she asks, narrowing her eyes as she remembers the time Leopold tried to take Henry to a Yankees game and half way through, he’d asked Leopold for some money to buy a slice of pizza and called her to pick him up instead. “I thought you didn’t like baseball.”

Henry shrugs dismissively. “He’s excited, so I guess I am, too.”

Regina frowns--that sounds like something she’d say.

“Well, maybe we can figure out some other stuff you want to do,” she says, trying not to dwell too much on all of the ways her own problems have influenced her son. “I’m sure the hotel we’re staying at has some of those brochures advertising different attractions. Maybe you’ll find some things in those.”

“Yeah,” Henry nods as he looks back to the window and smile. “Maybe.”

The captain of the plane announces that they need to make sure they’re in their seats, that their trays are up and that they’re buckled into their seats because in just a few short minutes, they’ll begin their descent into Seattle. Henry shoots her a look and rolls her eyes and she grins, caught red-handed in the lie she’d told him as they boarded the plane in Hartford when she told him he’d have to stay buckled in for the entire flight.

But it doesn't last long because as the plane begins to drop, Henry’s face scrunches up and he covers his ears with his hands--and when she stretches an arm around his shoulders, pulling him as closer as the confines of the plane will allow, he lets her. And as guilty she feels for being glad for her son’s discomfort, it serves the perfect distraction because as the plane touches down her last visit to Seattle and the man she came to see is the furthest thing from her mind.

When the first few rows ahead of them clear out, she reaches into the overhead compartment to grab Henry’s jacket--and when he protests, she points out the planes window, pointing to the gray skies that look like they’re about to bust open. He sighs and puts on the jacket as she grabs their carry-ons--then, drawing in a breath, she takes his hand a pulls him to the gate, laughing as he tries to pop his ears.

“Plug your nose and puff out your cheeks,” she tells him.

“What?”

Laughing she repeats it, then laughs again, as he looks to her as if she’s crazy, but nonetheless, tries it.

“Mom! Mom! I swallowed my gum.”

Her brow furrows as they come out of the gate. “You swallowed it?”

“Yeah, I gulped back some air to get my ears to pop and I swallowed it!” She grins as his eyes widen a little, completely unaware that he’s yelling. “Am I gonna get sick?”

“No.”

“But Mal told Lily if she eats her gum, it’ll stay there forever and twist around her organs and--”

“You’ll live,” she cuts in, shaking her head and laughing softly. “And your organs will be just fine.”

“But will it live in my stomach forever?”

“No,” she tells him, her voice dropping an octave. “You’re gonna poop it out.”

For a moment, Henry just stares at her with wide eyes, a slack jaw. and rosy cheeks, horrified that she’s talking about his poop in public and watching as she fishes the directions that Daniel gave her to get from the airport to the hotel--and she bites down on her lip when she can’t find them, hoping she didn’t leave them on her desk at work. After all, this trip--like her previous one--had been a spur of the moment decision and she wasn’t quite prepared to be traveling.

“We might have to stay here,” she tells him, still rummaging through her purpose. “At least until Daniel’s out of his meeting.” Glancing up at him briefly, she grins. “Maybe we can grab some chili cheese fries or--”

“You’re going to let me eat chili cheese fries?”

She nods, motioning in the direction of the food court. “Yeah. I don’t know. I just saw a sign from the corner of my eye. We can get something else if you don’t--”

“No. Chili cheese fries would be awesome. But… you never let me eat stuff like that.”

“We’re on vacation. Calories and cholesterol and saturated fats don’t exist on vacation.”

Henry grins. “I think I like Vacation Mom,” he tells her, just before his face falls. “Or are you just being nice to me because you know my gum is strangling my organs?!”

At that, she can’t help but laugh out as she looks to him. “Henry, if I thought something was strangling your organs, I’d have already hijacked a plane and had you halfway to the nearest hospital.”

He giggles. “True.”

“Now--”

“Daniel!”

She looks up, watching as Daniel pushes his way through the crowd, carrying a bouquet of bright pink flowers. “Hey, you! I thought I was meeting you at the hotel.”

“Change of plans,” he tells her, pressing a kiss to her cheek as she accepts the flowers. “I got out of my meeting early, so I figured I’d surprised you guys and pick you up.” Grinning, he turns to Henry and hands him a little bag. “And this is for you.”

Henry grins as he takes the bag, unrolling the top and grinning. “I don't know what King Caramels are, but I know that I’m going to eat them all before we get to the hotel.”

Regina laughs. “Thank you--for meeting us and for the flower and--”

“Those are coast rhododendrons, the State of Washington’s--”

“That sounds like a fungus,” Henry says, scrunching up his nose.

“They’re definitely not, but the place I am taking you two for lunch most certainly has fungus on the menu.”

For a moment, Henry looks grossed out--and then, he rolls his eyes. “Oh. They serve mushrooms.”

“You’ve got it.”

“So, where is this mushroom-serving place,” Regina asks, reaching for his hand. “And what else do you have planned for us?”

“Well, I was thinking we’d have lunch at this place at the Pike Place Market, then do a little sightseeing and--”

“That’s very Seattle.”

Daniel nods. “Well, since you two have never been here, I figured that was the best way to spend our time.”

Her stomach flutters and she nods, forcing as smile. “Perfect.”

Daniel gives her hand a little tug then loops his arm around Henry’s shoulders, turning them in the direction they need to go in to pick up their bags--and as they turn away from the gate, something catches her eye.

Or rather, someone.

There, just a few yards away is Robin and his son--the man she’s forced herself not to think about, the man whose mere voice attracted her, and the man she’d spent a whole day stalking. Her heart beats a little faster and she swallows hard, her stomach churning as all the things she’s refused to let herself think about since her last trip to Seattle come rushing back--and irrationally, she nearly turns herself in his direction.

But then Daniel tugs her in the opposite way and she reminds herself what a colossally bad idea it’d be to put herself in Robin’s orbit, and while she feels some deep--and probably a bit disturbing--connection to him, to him, she’s a complete stranger.

And that’s what she keeps telling herself all the way to baggage claim.

[queercapwriting]

Maggie’s Drive to Midvale

“Alex breaking down while home and Maggie comes after her” prompt from @lastbestplace and “Eliza calling Maggie to check on her post break up. What if Eliza reveals she also never wanted kids (Jeremiah did) but her perspective changed when she had Alex?  Maggie shows up in Midvale to make things right and get Alex back.” from @crimson-archangel and “how maggie got through her first night without alex (i know. sorry.)” from @freewillandphysics

She’s drunk.

She’s too drunk to drive and she’s almost too drunk to sling words together, let alone put one foot in front of the other.

She’s heard through the grapevine that Kara whisked Alex off to Midvale. 

She would take her bike out there right now if she wasn’t sure she’d crash it. If she wasn’t sure it would be completely disrespectful of Alex’s obvious desire to not be with her. 

Completely disrespectful of Alex’s choice to leave her behind. To abandon her for the sake of something, someone, she doesn’t even have yet, might not even want for years now. 

She orders another round.

Her phone buzzes.

Her heart leaps, because maybe it’s Alex. Maybe it’s Alex, calling to tell her that she loves her, that she’s changed her minds, that we should kiss the girls we wanna kiss and she wants to kiss...

It’s not Alex.

It’s Alex’s mother.

Maggie fumbles to press the magical green button that will bring her a little bit closer to Alex. Alex’s stubbornness, her persistence, her brilliance. Her cold streak, her warmth, all mixed together. 

She fumbles to press it, fast, because god, no, please say nothing’s happened to Alex, that nothing’s wrong, that -- 

“Dr. Danvers, is everything alright? Is Alex okay? Kara?”

There’s a slight silence on the other end, and Maggie frowns at her phone, like it’s offended her, like it caused Eliza to butt dial her, like -- 

“You’re going to have to say that again, Maggie dear, I’m afraid I couldn’t understand you.”

Maggie puts her finger in her opposite ear like that will help Eliza hear better.

No. 

No, that’s not it. She must have been slurring. All that alcohol.

Dammit.

She tries again, repeating herself, slower this time, more intentional.

“Yes, yes, the girls are safe, no one’s hurt. I was... I was actually calling about you, sweetie. I wanted to see if you’re with someone who can take care of you. But you... you sound like you’re alone. With a bottle of the same thing Alex is glued to right now.”

She says that last part more to herself than to Maggie, but Maggie hears, and her heart shreds.

“You didn’t have to call, Dr. Danvers, you... you have your own kids to take care of -- “

“Just because you and Alex don’t think you can work it out doesn’t mean you’re no longer a daughter to me, Maggie.”

She nearly starts sobbing at the sentiment, but something in the detective part of her brain slows her emotions. She squints. She tilts her head. She leans into her phone almost desperately.

“Don’t think we can work it out? Why? You... do you think we do?”

She hears Eliza chuckle softly, and she wonders if she said something funny. 

“Just as sharp as Alex always says you are, even brimming with alcohol.” She hears her sigh, and it reaches her ear like a loud gust of wind. She nearly drops her phone, but she hangs onto it like a lifeline.

“Dr. Danvers -- “

“You’re the only person who knows what’s best for you, Maggie. And I respect you not wanting children. I respect it quite a lot more than you might expect. And I would never want to try and change your mind.”

“But...” Maggie supplies, not knowing if she’s annoyed, angry, or hopeful for the first time since she and Alex had made love for the last time.

The last time.

She nearly chokes on a sob.

“But,” Eliza sighs. “I didn’t... I didn’t want children. Alex was... well, we didn’t conceive on purpose, but Jeremiah wanted a child so badly, and when... I’ve never loved anyone or anything as powerful as I love the woman you’re drinking over right now. And I’m not... I’m not saying that to guilt you, Maggie, or to... I didn’t even intend to say any of this when I called you, but I... you fit together. Your values align. Your goals.”

“Our goals? She wants... she wants PTA meetings and brownies and... and mom stuff!” Maggie splutters, agonized, and Eliza sighs again, but softer this time.

“That’s not all there is to being a parent. And fostering is... taking in Kara was... no. No, no no no no, I’m sorry, Maggie. I didn’t call to convince you of anything any which way, I genuinely called to see if you need anything, if I can do anything. Where are you? Are you home? You sound like you’re at a bar. Can I call you a cab, please? Will you let me do that for you, Maggie dear?”

She does.

She does let her, because she suddenly feels an urgent need to be home. Well, on her work partner’s couch, anyway.

Because she needs to sleep off this drunken stupor. Sleep it off enough to drive.

Because in the morning, that’s exactly what she does.

Drives.

Drives her motorcycle miles and miles and miles, coffee staving off a hangover and nerves keeping her alert.

Alex is on the porch with Eliza and Kara when she gets there.

Her eyes are red and swollen, like she only fell asleep come morning. Like she’s been crying. Like she’s been drinking as much as Maggie has.

She rushes her park job and she tugs off her helmet and she notes vaguely that Eliza is smiling and that Kara looks ready to throw her beyond Saturn, but she only has eyes for Alex.

Alex, who’s dropped her mug of coffee.

Alex, whose eyes are flooded with fresh tears.

Alex, whose jaw is nearly on the porch.

Alex. 

The love of her life.

The woman she wants to marry, the woman she wants to be her forever.

The woman whose name burns in her blood and whose laughter courses through her veins.

“I heard everything you said,” she starts, and Alex walks down from the porch, toward her, like she’s in a trance.

And maybe she is.

Maybe they both are.

“I heard everything you said, about how we can’t be together. About you wanting -- needing -- to be a mom. And I know you heard me. About how it’s not some trauma issue, how I’m not going to change my mind. And if... if this is crossing too many boundaries, if my being here is harming your healing, I’ll go. I’ll disappear, and you will never see me again.”

Both of their eyes burn with the memories of old words, new. Healed wounds, fresh.

“But if you give me just two minutes of your time, I -- “

“Two minutes,” Alex interrupts her, her voice cracked, her eyes blazing, her arms crossed over her chest and her lips moist.

“I know how badly you wanna be a mom. And I respect that. I... it’s not what I expected, but I love that about you. That you want to... Alex, I love everything about you. But we didn’t... we got so wrapped up in what we can’t do that we didn’t get wrapped up in what we could do. You being a mom and us being together but the kid being yours, unless... unless maybe getting to know the kid... your kid... would get me feeling otherwise, and we decided... Or fostering. Maybe teenagers, or older kids, maybe that would feel different to me than raising a baby. I know you made your decision, and I respect it, Alex, I respect you, I just... I just wanted to ask one more time, if we could... I don’t wanna give up on us, babe, I -- “

But the rest of her words are lost on Alex’s lips, on Alex’s tongue, on Alex’s hands in her hair and Alex’s tears on her cheeks.

“I love you,” Alex is whispering into her mouth, over and over and over and over, and Maggie is whispering the same, over and over and over and over.

Kara hugs Eliza, back on the porch, and when Maggie finally opens her tear-streaked eyes, finally glances past Alex’s face to those of her family -- their family -- all she sees are smiles that are welcoming her home.

[ms-maj]

Tell Me How

Eep, I wrote something. This is the very first fic I’ll have ever posted on Tumblr, so, here goes y’all. Thanks to @wordsonpages1 for the encouragement and kind words in getting me to post this. I would love any and all of your thoughts!

The sun, which had seemingly hung on as long as it could, had finally dipped below the horizon. Its last wisps of pink and orange were swallowed by the inky night that descended. There was no moon, only the lingering twilight and flickering street lamps to illuminate her way. She chose to live close to work, in the neighborhood where she’d be making a difference; she had wanted to see its impact. And see she did. She saw the impact of something that was not confined to the borders that separated the South side from the rest of Riverdale; she saw the impact in vacant, empty stares, heard it in cries, feeling the sobs in her arms as she tried to offer comfort.

Comfort, she snorted out loud as her eyes rolled. Betty Cooper wasn’t a hero, making a difference to these people; she was one decision away from being persona non-grata. Her house, at the end of a broken sidewalk, came into view and she felt a little of the weight she carried dissipate. It wasn’t much to look at; the blue-painted siding was faded and chipped, the sun had bleached the roof unevenly, the small unattached garage leaned at a precarious angle, but it was hers. She managed a slight smile as she turned the key in the lock, but it disappeared as quickly as it came.

Today had been a long day. The kind of day you felt in your bones. With an exhausted sigh, she pulled the door closed and upon the subsequent click, she felt her legs give from beneath her. She slid down the door, knees pulled tight to her chest as the tears began to fall in steady streams from her eyes. The scent clung to her sweater, all Baby Magic and sunshine, as his weeping mother cried in her office. Another life was gone, one second a proud and beaming father, the next; a statistic. She’d been on too many cases like this lately; had to ask too many people questions about their state of life she should never have to ask. She should never have to be called in to assess whether a child can safely return to its remaining parent. No one should have to go through what this poor girl faces, no child should grow up without…

Betty only realized what she was doing as the hot tears hit the open abrasions on her palm. She gently splayed her hands over her knees, breathing slowly and deeply as her head fell back on the door. She hated her job. No, not entirely, she supposed. Betty loved to help, she was intrinsically made for getting answers; no truth could outrun Betty Cooper. Yet more and more, there were simply no answers for what she’d been seeing. Slowly, on bone-weary legs, she stood and tried to push down the images that were seared in her mind.

Every time her eyes closed she saw a baby, the spitting image of his father, who would never hear his laughter or remember his smile —No!— she thought, her head shaking neared violent as she made sure the deadbolt was latched. She pushed away from the door with purpose, propelling her down the short hallway into her bedroom. As tired as she was, the grey sheets and yellow walls never looked less inviting. She stripped off her blazer and slacks and traded them for her favorite worn yoga pants and old Smiths tee-shirt. Throwing herself onto the bed, she stared at the ceiling, willing her eyes to close and the sleep she was so desperate for to come. But after an hour it hadn’t, then another; images of bright blue eyes and wispy blonde hair haunting her. A huff of air escaped her as she swung her legs over the side of the bed. It was way too late to go for her customary run but she’d picked up some old Tae-Bo tapes at a garage sale a few years before and they never seemed to fail her when she needed to let off some steam. The old thirteen inch Panasonic fired up as she fixed her hair into a tight ponytail and through the auto-adjust tracking, Betty got lost in the routine. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Routine it became. The lack of sleep, two a.m. Tae-Bo, the inability to separate from this case. It had been two weeks of tenuous phone calls, ‘just checking in’ she’d say when the weary mother would answer her phone. Betty knew it didn’t help, that the platitudes of a strange woman who had the power to take your child away probably weren’t conducive to grieving. Betty resigned herself the obsession, even if she didn’t fully understand it. There were so many children she had dealt with and while many of their stories stayed in her heart, none of their eyes seemed to haunt as much as this ones. Tomorrow, she would call her doctor tomorrow, she decided. Stretching back against her pillows, Betty closed her eyes.

“Wake up, please…please wake up,” she cried over the prone form. Her hands fisted whatever piece of clothing she could get her hands on, sobs wracking her body as she sank against the cool tiles. “You can’t leave me. You promised…” The body under hers shuddered. She shot up, pulling them with her as her hand went to sweep the hair from the forehead where it was stuck in what appeared to be sweat and no small amount of vomit.

“Betty,” the voice rasped. Her tears subsided, for just a second, before all she saw were the whites of eyes.

“No!” she whimpered. “NO!”

Betty woke with the word on her lips. She was practically panting she was breathing so hard. The memories she worked so hard to suppress, all she had fought and conquered, everything broadcast in live and in-living-color right in her bedroom. Reaching for the water bottle on her nightstand, the shrill ring of her phone cut through the night, the number flashing on the screen sent chills through her body.

“Betty Cooper,” she answered, willing her voice past her lips.

“Miss Cooper, this is Detective Neal. I had heard you were handling the case regarding Mr. Cousins.”

She swallowed thickly. “You heard correctly, Detective. I assume a call this late isn’t for a clerical error.”

“No, Miss Cooper. I wish I was calling you with something as banal at that, unfortunately, we’re going to need you to come and remove the child.”

Betty’s head smacked against the headboard audibly. “I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was closer to ten minutes when she pulled up to the cute, suburban home. She may have broken a few traffic laws, but she was certain that anyone foolish enough to pull her over that night would have gotten the raw end of Betty’s razor-like tongue. She was running on pure adrenaline, that’s the only way she’d get through this night. To have to walk through this house, again, not knowing what she’d have to see inside, made her insides flip uneasily. The lights of the ambulance and police cars danced through the darkened street, casting shadows in suburbia, where they’ve always existed and no one thought to look. Betty’s hands wrung and stretched as she made her way through the door, flashing her credentials at the officer. She wove her way through the throng of responders, focused on the cries of a three-month-old little boy who needed, well, everyone who’d left him. He’d have to settle for her and the family who was taking him in.

The kitchen was a disaster. The wife apparently had used every glass in the house to allay her anger. Futile. Ineffective. Useless. The words Betty remembered so well after her own dalliance in grief echoed through her head as the physical shards of anger crunched under her feet. She could feel the darkness welling inside her as she crossed the field of broken glass. Fingernails pressed into her palms, she felt it before the skin broke this time, snapping her focus back to the present.

“Ah, Miss Cooper!” A tall man waved her up the stairs. She took a deep breath before ascending, knowing what she might face at the top. Fortunately, the coroner had been quick and all evidence to what had happened was out of sight. Small miracles. The breath fell from her lips heavy as she walked into the nursery. Bright blue eyes clouded with tears as they met hers. A sad smile formed on her lips as she reached out to try and soothe him. But there’d be nothing soothing about that night. Not that Betty could produce.

“…I don’t know that he’s had other charges, but he’s the only open foster we’ve got right now. He’ll have to adapt quickly to an infant, but, that’s what he signed up for.” She realized the older detective was speaking to her and turned her head toward him to meet his eyes. The man’s eyes were weary, his back hunched by the weight of the job he carried. He ran a hand over his shorn hair and met Betty’s eyes with sympathy. “We get way too many of these calls, Miss Cooper.”

"Don’t I know it,” she agreed sadly. She looked back to the baby, and placed a hand on his belly, trying to pour all the love she could muster into the gentle touch. Before she could register what was happening, a diaper bag had been slung over her shoulder and the car seat placed at her feet. Through a haze of tears, she managed to secure the infant in his seat and get him settled into her car. She looked at the slip of paper in her hands, the address eluding her. She hated when that happened; she’d only been back in Riverdale a few months and still didn’t know it as well as she should have, not for as long as she’d lived there before, not when all she used to do was ride around…she stopped, shaking the vestiges of that train of thought away, securing it away for a night her emotions weren’t already overwhelming her. She plugged the address into her GPS as the sound of the Aquabats filled the air. The little boy cooed, a gurgle escaping his lips every now and again as they drove through the winding roads. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The drive to the foster house took longer than Betty expected. They ended up outside the city proper, a small dirt road leading to a cottage that overlooked the Sweetwater River. Betty took a deep breath when she got out of the car, honeysuckle enveloped her completely and knocked her senses for a loop. Her mouth opened as a ragged breath fell from her lips. She tried to bite back the tears that gathered on her waterline, she could taste the blood on her lip as she opened the car door. But try as she might to fight them, the tears cascaded down her cheeks as she went to remove the sleeping cherub from her back seat.

“So, this is where you’ll be staying, little guy. I’m sorry I wasn’t paying attention when Detective Neal was saying their name but they have to be a lovely family to get you.” Betty ran her hand down the baby’s cheek, he sighed a half smile as he nestled against her hand. She tucked the moment away, deep into her heart and rang the doorbell. “I promise I’ll be back to see you, not that you know who I am but, oh sweetling, know that you’re loved.” Betty did not notice the door open, therefore she did not see the young man standing there taking in the scene before him. When he swallowed audibly, Betty tore her eyes from the baby and startled herself into speaking.

“I am so sorry, I didn’t mean just to be standing here staring at him…I swear he was in good hands,” she laughed without humor before the sound of his voice froze her in place.

“I have no doubt that he was, Betty.”

Betty’s head slowly rose, green eyes brimming with tears connecting with stormy blue. She wasn’t sure her voice would work, but she managed to croak out a single word. “Juggie?”