#and I'm sorry my loves but there is no escaping being a decent person in your day to day life
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I have to say I don’t think I really believe in “Bible study” in the way that many Protestants practice it. Though I believe in sola gratia and sola fide, Protestantism’s theology as applied has a strange quirk that makes some Protestants obsessed with making sure they have actually said the magic words necessary to acquire salvation, which necessitates believing the correct things, or discerning the means by which one knows one is saved, which often spirals into a strange obsession with trying to understand what the Bible is “really” trying to say and what it “really” means, usually involving selective and haphazard dives into etymology, dead languages, and ancient cultures, our knowledge of which is imperfect, and a strange intensity bordering on conspiratorial paranoia about the act of translating a dead language into readable English.
This is as far as I can tell one of the Pharisaical elements of Protestantism, in that people become obsessed with knowing all the right things, but are still, as we all observe with painful regularity, tremendously unpleasant people.
#you know what's amazing is there are some incredibly basic verses in Christianity that are almost impossible to put into practice#consequently people ignore them in favor of finding some obscure or esoteric way to guarantee that they're 'in'#and I'm sorry my loves but there is no escaping being a decent person in your day to day life#yet many skip this step#Protestants struggle to internalize satisfying answers about why one continues to sin after salvation#Catholics by contrast fully expect you to continue sinning right up until the moment of death and that's why you need to go to the church#so the priest can say the magic words for you#I'm not crazy about that but it is at least nice that they aren't shocked that you still drink too much#or whatever it is you do that you shouldn't
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Hello! This is something kind of niche but I was wondering if you could write a Pornstar!Miguel x Pornstar!Fem!Reader, where he is a new pornstar and meets with her the day before their shoot. He’s like super sweet to her and they have an informal hangout/date to like be comfortable around each other. Reader tries their best to ease his worry him cuz he seems kinda shy, but the day of their shoot he’s a total freak in the sheets and it totally catches her off guard? Dirty talk, dom and all.
I love your writing so much and I know you’ll do a great job writing whatever your heart desires for this one! Thx in advance <333
No lie this sounds cute as fuck! Here we go!
Warning: MINORS DNI, Smut, rough sex, dirty talk
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It was another beautiful day. You were ready to receive your next paycheck, but first, you had to help the new guy. A soft chuckle escaped your lips as you walked into a popular coffee shop. You were actually excited for this secret meetup. Normally, it was informal to meet your coworkers before a shoot, but this new guy? Oh, he was your type!
You were a pornstar. It is a long story on how you got into the business, but you were good at acting. A little too good. As you waited in line, you let out a soft sigh. While the paychecks were nice, you were really ready for something new. Cue, your manager making you a teacher and setting you up with newbies.
"Two extra shots of espresso." You muttered, trying to avoid groaning at the thought.
Despite the struggle of your job, you were eager for tomorrow. The new porn star, Miguel, was going to be your next partner. You saw his file and the man was huge and good looking. He was the one who actually asked to meet you in person. It was cute how shy he sounded over the phone.
"(Y/N)?" Miguel waves slowly, sitting in a corner table. You approached him with your drink,
"Hi, Miguel!" You said with a chirp, "My god, you're so tall."
"Sorry," Miguel went to shake your hand before immediately sitting down towards your comment.
You sat across from him, admiring his features. The man chose to become a porn star than a model? He was going to be an instant lady killer! Hopefully his acting was decent.
"Thanks again for meeting me. As you can tell, I'm a little nervous with this being my first shoot and all." Miguel said. You smiled,
"It's no biggie. It's kind of fun breaking the rules like this. Why don't we just chat about ourselves, get more comfortable with each other? I'm sure it will help you out a lot." You offered.
Miguel took the suggestion and the two of you spoke for hours. There was a chemistry there and you sensed it. You were disappointed when you had to leave for the night. Miguel parted ways with and kiss to your hand. He was such a gentleman! You were already imagining the slow and soft sex he was going to give you tomorrow.
It would be different for sure, but you were looking forward to it. Hopefully, Miguel won't disappoint you like all of your other coworkers. It was frustrating to work in the porn industry, but could never cum in your own videos. You always had to fake an orgasm and pleasure yourself later.
"Let's not think of the negative! Just...look forward for tomorrow," You told yourself.
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"Alright, you know the rules. First shoot, newbie gets to pick the theme. We will go from there afterwards," Your manager called out to the crew.
You glanced at Miguel, seeing him nervously look around, "Hey, it's going to be okay. I promise I won't bite, unless you want me too."
"Haha," Miguel smiled towards you, "Is it okay if we do something simple?"
"You get to pick. Why not something that will get you in the mood?" You suggested and showed him the costume room, "Is there something you want to see me wear?"
Miguel looked around, his eyes sparkling at some of the outfits. He glanced back at you,
"I know what I want to do."
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"Mhm~ I don't have any money for this massage~ Is there any other way I can pay you?"
You laid against a soft bed, spreading your naked legs apart. Your gaze towards Miguel as you slowly rubbed your own clit. Miguel had chosen a massage sex scene. Something where he could feel your body to get you prepped. How kind and generous of him. You hummed sweetly, faking a moan as you dove your fingers towards your hole.
"No money? That's fine, I'll just have to massage one more place before you can leave."
You're eyes widen as Miguel removed his pants. He hovered over you, stealing your lips in a forceful kiss before his hands roamed your body. You pressed yourself against him, your hand heading towards his cock. Miguel grabbed your wrists, pinning them above your head before growling lowly,
"I'm giving the massage. Not you, chica (girl)"
For once, you felt a shiver run down your spine. What happened to the shy man from yesterday? You're eyes widen as Miguel's fingers started to enter your pussy. He started with one, stretching you out more than some of your coworker's dicks. You raised your hips slightly, wanting to help him get more access, but once again he pinned you down.
"Tsk, tsk, do you come onto all your massage therapists?" Miguel spat lowly, "Being such a slut?"
You shivered once more to his cruel tone. He sucked against your breasts while another finger entered your pussy. Miguel's fingers were wandering around your gummy walls, searching for that sweet spot. This was different. You're eyes widen once he curled his fingers, making you moan for real.
"That's right. Pay your bill in full." Miguel whispered.
You gasped lowly as Miguel pumped his fingers against that spot. He removed himself from your breasts, keeping you held down. His thumb pressed against your clit, causing you to squirm under him. Miguel just kept making eye contact with you. It was as if he wanted to watch you break because of him.
"What a slutty face. You like this kind of massage right?"
"Y-Yes." You whimpered, feeling your body burn with pleasure.
This was actually happening. You felt a tight knot growing in your lower abdomen. Miguel's fingers only went faster. It wasn't long until he entered a third finger that really made you break. You arched your back, moaning and whining as he wrecked your pussy with just his fingers alone. With one more curl, you finally felt that tight tension burst.
"You're getting my work area dirty, that's going to cost extra."
You were panting softly from your intense orgasm. Miguel withdrew his fingers, causing you to shiver slightly. You were feeling the need, the want. Your pussy was throbbing and begging to be filled. Miguel was the first person who actually made you cum. You gasped, forcing a smile as you saw him position his dick right against your folds.
He was fucking big! You spread your legs, teasing your entrance for him. This was just part of the job. Miguel grunted as he grabbed your legs, placing them over his shoulders. He bit against your inner thigh before pushing his dick inside you. You whimpered, arching your back as you pretended to be fine.
Miguel's dick was stretching you out. This was a first. His dick felt hot and strong. Once he was fully inside you, Miguel pinched your clit, causing you to moan and whine. He smirked, pounding the life out of your pussy, breaking you down even more.
"So fucking tight. You don't get much exercise here, do you?" He mocked.
You moaned in response, focusing a little too much on how good this felt. His dick beating against your pussy with each rough and wet slap of his hips. His tip kissing your cervix each time, threatening to remind you that this was his moment. You were his fuck toy. You whined, your eyes nearly rolling back as Miguel rubbed your clit again.
"You're going to have to come back. I'm going to have to remind this pussy that it owes me payment." Miguel grunted as he went faster.
You felt your growing orgasm once more. Miguel held your body down against the bed, pressing his dick further inside you. Your mouth formed an 'o' as you started to see stars. Whimpers and moans were all you were able to say as you cam hard against his dick. Even after a second orgasm, you still could not believe that this was happening.
"That's a good fucking sign. My little slut is finally relaxing," Miguel spat as he griped your hips tightly, cumming inside you.
Your body trembled as you felt his hot, sticky load fill you. With a pop, Miguel pulled out, leaving your pussy a mess. A mixture of your juices and his cum pouring out of your abused hole.
"Cut! Good job (Y/N), Miguel! I think that's going to be a killer!" You managed yelled out.
"Are you okay?" Miguel asked as he helped you up. You panted softly, regaining your composure,
"Y-Yeah,"
"I didn't go overboard, did I? You're not hurt?" He kept asking, giving you a towel to wrap yourself with.
"You did amazing. I'm the opposite of hurt," You told him as the two of you walked towards the showers, "In fact, you did something none of my other coworkers could do."
"I did?"
"Yes, and I would love to be your partner for ongoing shoots. If not, then...maybe we can meet outside of work?" You whispered the last part to him, feeling slightly embarrassed. Miguel just smiled,
"I would love that."
You watched Miguel enter the shower first, wondering to which part he agreed to. Unsure, you followed him into the shower, still daydreaming about his dick.
You found out afterwards that Miguel agreed to both.
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I hope you liked it!!! Not really sure how porn videos actually work, haha
#miguel o'hara#miguel o'hara smut#miguel spiderverse#miguel o'hara x reader#spiderman 2099#miguel o’hara x reader#miguel spiderman#atsv miguel
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ahhh I understand, I’m glad you replied to my request though! can you simply just make reader a childhood friend of Isagi but the scenario is that reader wants to have her first kiss with Isagi because she trusts him and secretly has a big crush on him?
✦ 𝐈𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮. (𝐅𝐭. 𝐘. 𝐈𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐢)
Syn: You need your first kiss according to your friends by you only trust one person
Pairings: Yoichi Isagi x Reader.
A/N: sorry about the rushed ending I already took farr too long to make this so yeah
This was one of the nights you would dream of, hanging out with your friends and doing things that you probably shouldn't but who gives a fuck really? The night was starting to get rather grey before one of your friends suggested truth or dare.
Overused? Sure. But it worked, the room was bustling with chatter before it was your turn.
"Truth or dare Y/N?"
You tilted your head to the side as in you were thinking hard about this simple choice.
"Hmmm, Truth"
"Okay! Whose the first boy you've kissed?"
Damn, She got you. The room was quiet and at first your friends got excited because they thought silence was thinking, as in you missed so many guys you can't remember. But no, it was stalling and it wasn't helping anything.
"I... I um, actually never kissed a dude before"
The room was quiet again before a loud surge basically shattered your ears. Things like "WHAT!? Y/N YOU'RE DROP DEAD GORGEOUS HOWWW" Or "That's a lie, you're not lying, right?" Or... "Ha. Loser" Just what you needed on an already exhausting night.
"I'm being serious! I just never really... Y'know..."
Two of your friends eyed you suspiciously before whispering amongst themselves.
"Okay, well Y/N if you were going to have your first kiss right now and you could pick anyone, who would it be with?".
There was another pause but this one seemed more acceptable. Your mind searched through all of its core memories to find a person who could fit the criteria for your first kiss. They have to have decent looks, a nice reputation and personality and basic love for you.
You could only think of one person that could meet all those standards. Your friend; Yoichi Isagi.
"Well I guess I would have to go with Yoichi Isagi, I mean he's stuck to my side for a few years."
Your friends quietly searched the memory for any sight or interaction with this kid.
"Ohhh you mean that kid on the soccer team?" One of your friends jumped up as they heard the origin of the mysterious kid.
"Oh! Yeah I remember now. He's a cute one" your other friend shouted out, clearly not caring who was in the room listening to her.
"Yeah, heh..." You say while subconsciously staring daggers at your friend.
"Y/N!!! Tell your friends that their parents are here!"
Everyone kinda heard themselves so they all emptied the room themselves. You waved goodbye to everyone and got ready to go to bed.
As the day started up again all you could think about was the events that transpired last night. It only got worse when you heard that sweet, sweet voice...
"Hey! Y/N! How you didn't think you could escape me for another second of the day, did you?"
No.... Of course not. I mean the huge soccer playing, all seeing menace definitely would've found me anyway with those eyes and that brain of his.
"Why have you been avoiding me? Is it because of that game? I know it was sorta, kinda, bad for me but at least we won"
"No, no it's not the game I.... I just had a huge night"
"wanna talk about it?"
"...Later" You say dismissively.
Gosh he was hot... Did he always look at you with that passion in his eyes? No! This is your Best friend! You can't do that to him... You don't like him you're being silly.... But he's so damn cute, such nice lips, such a nice smile.. and that feral smirk he gets on the field.
You were kinda nervous about talking to him later, even though it was just your friend Isagi, it didn't feel so innocent anymore especially when you have thoughts like this going through your head. It doesn't matter that much though... You'll just talk when you guys talk... Nothing will go.... Wrong?
"You like me Y/N!?" Isagi questioned with a red face that's seeking validation.
"w-what!? Where the hell did you learn that information!?"
"From Y/F"
Damn it, your friend, the one person you thought you could trust ratted you out. You swore that when you saw them again it was up.
"I... I...." You couldn't even form sentences, what the fuck!? Your friend just snitched on you!
"I also heard from a little birdie that you wanted a certain blue eyed guy with a passion for talking shit and making goals to fulfill the honor of giving you your first kiss."
"Damn, that bitch can't keep her mouth shut for shit!"
He laughs lightheartedly before grabbing your hands and bringing you closer to him. He brushes your hair from your face and that feral look and his eyes were replaced with something much more soft and tame.
"I like you too Y/N, so much in fact that I might just give you more than just a kiss that you've been so desperately seeking"
He shared that same warm smile before pulling you close by your waist and planting a warm kiss on your soft lips, you kinda just melted into him and he did the same, it became sloppy pretty fast. You guys didn't even see that anyone could've just walked by and saw you guys.
When you guys finally separated to catch your breath he leaned his forehead on yours and chuckled before grabbing your hand and pulling you into his arms.
"I've wanted to do that for a while... Also I won't forgive you for holding out on me" There's the Isagi you remember. He's still in there somewhere?
#bllk isagi#bllk x you#bllk x reader#bllk#yoichi isagi x reader#yoichi isagi#blue lock isagi#isagi x reader#isagi x you#isagi yoichi#Yoichi bllk#black reader
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Entry 31
Day 223
This is him. One of the only people that can help me find The Doctor. The Heavy-Body Builder.
One problem: The man is the definition of "Looks scary, is a wet cat of a man." He definitely TRIED to be intimidating, but he failed pretty miserably at it when I met him after being unconscious for 10 days.
(Yes I did a double take. I still can't believe I was out for THAT long)
Picture this: Me walking towards a towering city of collapsing buildings with dust filled air. Eyes focused on the small blinks of light that just barely escape the smog- I'm thinking that I've finally made it! Comparator City!
And then I get absolutely BODIED by a huge hunk of metal. I wish I were kidding. My poor spine! My arm! It got freaking CRUSHED! I was sent flying a decent few feet and ended up crashing into an old light pole (Again. OW.) All that I can remember happening next is that same hunk of metal approaching me and some guy jumping out of it. But then... Well. I was out like a light.
Managed to wake up (after what felt like) a few hours later and oh GOODNESS did it hurt. My back, my right side, my stump of an arm- It all hurt! But there was somebody in the very dim room with me. The same person that crawled out of that hunk of metal.
"Thank goodness you're awake!" He had said when I first gained consciousness. "I was worried that you wouldn't stabilize! You've been unconscious for over a week!"
"I've been WHAT?!" And of course, when I sat up I saw the damage the man had done to me. Machines were strapped all over my body, an IV drip sticking out of my arm (Where he found a clean needle I will not ask.) a whole heart rate monitor- He was stacked! But from the state of everything, he was telling me the truth. "You knocked me unconscious for a week?!"
"Well it's r-really been ten days-"
"TEN DAYS?!"
"Yes- Yes I know it sounds absolutely horrible but! But! You're recovering at an accelerated rate! You should be good to go in a few days? Maybe three? The experimental drug is working great for you!" He had been blabbering and talking so fast that I nearly missed that detail.
"Experimental- I'm sorry, EXPERIMENTAL DRUG?" Of course I had been outraged back then. (Even looking back now I'm still a bit ticked off at being used as a guinea pig for a drug that could have killed me, but hey! I'm alive now!) "You used an EXPERIMENTAL DRUG to heal me."
"Yes! And it worked!" He stepped away from me to grab my prosthetic arm. "And! And I managed to upgrade your arm! It got destroyed- Again I'm so sorry about that- but hey! At least now your map and compass aren't an extra item to carry around!"
"So you fixed the nerve sensors? The solar panels?"
"Uh- No. Unfortunately I don't have access to the receptors or the proper solar panels you need." He had explained while reattaching my arm. "But! But, it works a lot like mine!" He flashed his brass arm, glowing a soft red. "It's powered by redstone! Should last you a solid month before you need to recharge it!"
And there was the main problem. "How in the ever loving hell do I get this 'redstone' stuff? Heck, where could I even get it?"
"Easy! Me!" He flicked on a lever on the backside of my arm and it felt... Nice at the time. Sturdy. Like it wouldn't die on me when I needed it most. "I use the Parrot System, so as long as you can get mail through the Parrots you should be good!"
"... The who?"
You wouldn't believe me if I told you this man began to glow with embarrassment. I mean he LITERALLY glowed. Pointy ears and face turning a bright red that GLOWED.
"Right, uh- The parrots! They're one of the middle tier delivery birds! I'm friends with their Flight Master! I... I take it you have no idea who I'm talking about."
"Not a damn clue."
"First of all, watch your tongue. Second! That's okay! I should have enough in store that should last you about three months- But you really need to find the Flight Masters. They'll help you in the long run."
When he stopped his rambling I focused on the newly upgraded arm. It is always a weird sensation, flexing a limb that's not really there. But the small tug of metal fingers and steel plates listening to one's mind is even weirder. And I mean REALLY weird.
"Who... Exactly are these Flight Masters?" I managed to ask him after a few moments of silence. "How do you... Get under their wing?"
"That-" The man paused and the red glow only grew. "That was a horrible pun-" He has a really nice laugh. Small but breathless.
"But it works! I mean, they have to be Birds of a Feather to Fly together-"
"Stop! Stop, no!"
"When am I going to stop, huh?! Never!" And then I started to laugh. I think it was just my mind needing something to focus on other than the glaring new arm attached to my body.
"Goodness you may be worse than Gri-" His laughter died when he barely mentioned a name. I couldn't get all of it, but it must be the Flight Master.
"Worse than...?"
"Y-You will find out eventually." His tune changed from that point going forward.
He eventually gave me his name (Mumbo) and gave me a quick summary of the three Flight Masters.
The Canary: Flight Master of the small, yellow birds that linger around Comparator City. Used by the residents of said city. Apparently the easiest one to befriend.
The Parrot: Flight Master of the robotic parrots that fly around all over the Crashlands. They're more tricky to get a hold of as they have a whole database on who's a customer and who's not. Need to find the Parrot Flight Master in order to get on the list.
The Crow: Flight Master of the Murders. Every crow I have seen so far apparently belongs to Him. And apparently the only way to find him is a mystery to even Mumbo. All I can do is hope for the best with that one.
That was all the information he was willing to tell me. Apparently I struck a nerve by getting him to almost spill the name of the Parrot Flight Master. I'm still resting in this small room, letting myself recover from being plowed by that big old machine.
I even tried asking him what that THING was that he hit me with! But he just shook his head and said it was a prototype I shouldn't bother myself with.
Things are just getting really overwhelming now. So much information to process. How do I find the Canary? Or hell, the Parrot? I'm not even going to TOUCH the subject of the Crow. What about the Demon? Is he still around? Is he in Comparator City? Will I run out of the weird redstone dust before I find the Parrot?
So many questions.
Too little answers.
I think I'm just going to shut off my mind for a little bit.
MLW
G.U.I.D.E. 67
#hermitblr#hermitcraft#the crash#void art#hermitaday#original art#mcyt fanart#mumbo jumbo#mumbo fanart#hermit a day may#martyn itlw#martyn inthelittlewood
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what do u think of the silent hill remake so far personally i'm really loving it
(minor silent hill 2 remake spoilers in this reply, no story spoilers though)
IT'S SO GOOD. i'm SHOCKED. like i always thought it would be a decent game i never bought into the negativity really but i didn't think it would be like... great? i assumed it would be fine but objectively maybe a 6.5 or 7/10 but i'd love it just because it's silent hill and i can always just replay the original when i want the full experience but GODDAMN.... i'm only like halfway through the woodside apartments cause i can only play when it's dark out and my mum's awake so it's a very limited timeframe lol but so far i'm having an incredible time. i've never been more tense in my life. i'm also one hit away from death at all times because i'm bad at video games and the way james is moaning in pain and barely able to walk is stressing me out even more sbdhfjsd i'm so sorry dude i will get better at combat i promise.
idk my main thing i keep thinking about is how clear it is that the devs really really love the og game. my biggest worry was that they wouldn't be able to capture the atmosphere and feeling of the original in a modern game but fucking hell they really did. it's of course not the exact same, the fixed camera angles being traded in for an over the shoulder view and the better graphics and relatively normal voice acting all make it so you can't fully recreate the way the original felt, but none of it has made the game worse at all, the differences aren't a big deal. i've seen people say the original felt more dreamlike and the remake feels more oppressive and i think that perfectly sums it up. running through the streets of silent hill in the og feels like you're trapped in a nightmare you can't wake up from, the remake feels more like you're trapped in a very real scenario you just can't escape
also!!! obsessed with how they handled the corpses strewn about. they clearly realised that if they did what the original did and used james' character model for all of them it would be a little too obvious because of the better textures and graphics, and if it's obvious then james would have to comment on it and that makes it a direct part of the story rather than a subtle eerie thing. the one with the key just being a pile of clothes is a decent solution but i looove one by the tv being covered by a sheet and how if you interact with it james reaches out to remove it but changes his mind and leaves it. i thought that was clever
i could go on forever but my mum's calling me to come stack firewood my life is so hard
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So I saw that you had I tag I follow and immediately rushed over! So first and foremost...How are you? Are you drinking water daily? And I also wish you a good rest of days.
I was wondering since I rarely see this for Akatsuki no Yona. Like a Chubby reader. That's all. Like didn't they exist back then too?...
So basically Reader was Yona's personal maid, one of her most trusted friends like Hak and Soowon. So now they are apart of the group and basically feel out of place. She has a crush on Jae-ha but knowing he only goes for "attractive" women she doesn't act upon her feelings.
What happens next? 👀
Insecure Chubby!Reader Who Has A Crush On Jae-Ha
Pairing: Jae-ha x Chubby!Fem!Reader
Warnings: uh talking down about yourself, insecurities, lowkey suggestive at one point? but nothing crazy
Genre: comfort, fluff
Post-Type: Oneshot
Word Count: 2.2k
Summary: In which you confess to Yona that you have a crush on Jae-ha, but he'd never like you back because you're chubby and he only goes for thin women. Little do you know that someone is listening in on all this o.o
[A/N: OMg hi...I KNOW I KNOW. It's been way over a year since you requested it. If you're still around, you're probably wondering what the heck this is as it's been long forgotten. I'm sorry it took me so long to write, I had it half written in my drafts all this time because I started second guessing myself and I really loved this request and didn't think I could do it justice. SO here's my completed version of this. I hope it's decent, and hopefully you're still interesting in reading it :'). Sorry if it's disappointing NFEKJFKAEF <;3]
It was night now. Months had passed since Yona ran out of her castle after her father's murder. Hak had saved the both of you from Soowoon’s revenge on her father as you would not back down and go to their side either. Yona loved and respected you, so you owed her everything, and that still hadn’t changed. You still refer to her as Princess, just like Hak, but the two of you were closer than ever–going beyond the friendship a personal maid and a Princess should probably ever have.
Owls hooted in the background and the sound of crickets surrounded you. You had all stopped for the night to set up camp, and were currently in your shared tent with Yona and Yoon. The young boy was fast asleep in the far corner of the tent, exhausted from running around all day, but you and Yona were wide awake from the excitement of the day–too pumped to even think about sleeping just yet. Giggles escaped your mouth at the girl-talk that was being exchanged between you both, then Yona began to blush as you asked her about her feelings for Hak. You had noticed the change in the atmosphere between them for a while now.
“He’s just…different from how I used to see him? Instead of just seeing him as that annoying kid back then, he’s more of a man in my eyes now… He said some uh, lovely things to me the other night and it just made me realize my feelings even more,” She hides her head in her hands, thinking back on the deep conversation she had with the raven haired man a few nights ago, but clears her throat and turns the attention away from herself, “What about you, Y/N? Seen anyone in any villages that have caught your eye? Or perhaps even someone among us, hmm?”
You could hear the slight tease in her voice at her question, she fully knew who you liked, but wanted to hear you say it yourself. After all, what fun is girl-talk if she was the only one dropping juicy information.
“Well…there is someone I like, but he’d never go for a girl like me…” you trail off, looking down at your hands.
“Jae-ha would love you, Y/N. You’re gorgeous, kind, and you have a heart of gold, I see the way he looks at you whenever your back is turned.”
“W-what? How did you know it was Jae-ha?” You ask bewildered.
Yona laughs, placing a hand on your shoulder, “So it really is him? I was just making a lucky guess, wow.”
You huff. Perhaps it was a little obvious since you always got nervous around him and ONLY him. The slight disappointment that graced your features whenever he spoke of a beautiful woman he ran into in town. The tiny sparks of desire to have him speak to you with those lovely words, but it would never happen.
“He was probably just wondering why I can’t be so open with him like I am with everyone else,” You sigh. “I know I don’t belong here. You’re gorgeous and way above my social status. The other guys in our group are all very attractive as well, I’m the only one who sticks out like a sore thumb, but I guess I just have to deal with it!”
You fake a smile, regretting a little that you opened up too much.
“Y/N, is that really how you’ve been feeling this whole time?” Yona asks, her voice now softer at your confession.
“It’s alright, really. I’m used to it by now, I don’t know why I suddenly decided to say that all right now. Everything’s okay!”
“No, everything’s not okay. Y/N, you are the most beautiful person I know. I don’t care if you think your extra weight makes you ugly compared to the rest of us, that doesn’t make a difference in my eyes and Jae-ha would be a fool to have that be a difference to him as well! Tell him how you feel! He would treat you like royalty.” Yona explains, a little enraged that you’ve been feeling this way all this time without her realizing it, “And I know we come from different backgrounds, but out here, we’re all the same. You and I are on the same level. You’re my best friend, and that won’t ever change! You are one of us, part of the happy hungry bunch! It wouldn’t be the same without you.”
“Thank you, Princess Yona. You’ve been a great blessing to me and I’m so very grateful to be your friend,” You smile slightly, but it falls again when you think of Jae-ha. “It seems that Jae-ha only goes for thin, beautiful women though. I can’t imagine him directing those compliments to me when I’m the complete opposite of all those women…I- I guess I just wish he could see me as a beautiful woman despite my weight. Even if it was only for a second.”
Yona once again assures you that you are indeed beautiful and that nothing is wrong with you. She was a little lost for words on what else she could say to help you feel better, she just wished you could see yourself the way that she saw you–a beautiful woman, inside and out.
“If I’m so beautiful, then why won’t he look at me the way I want him to?” You shout in frustration, a little too loudly.
Your conversation is cut short though as the sound of shuffling is heard from outside the tent, along with the distant murmuring of the rest of the boys who were still awake, engaged in small talk.
“Will you both shut your mouths? I’m trying to sleep here. Y/N stop being a wimp and just confess to him already. You’ll never know until you at least try!” Yoon groans out with a huff, before light snores escape his mouth once again.
“He’s right,” Yona whispers now, not wanting to awaken the tempered boy again, “But I guess this can all wait for another day. Let’s sleep, it’s getting pretty late.”
You both yawn at the same time and laugh lightly to yourselves. Perhaps it could wait…
Sleep consumes Yona pretty quickly, but your mind is plagued with a million thoughts that keep you up all night. It would be a tough day tomorrow.
…
The next day, your journey together continues as you finish packing up the last of your camp and continue forward.
Yona and Hak had run up ahead of everyone else in the early morning to get in some more arrow shooting practice while the rest of you moved to catch up at a decent pace. You lagged behind a bit, lost in thought of everything you spoke about last night.
“Careful, wouldn’t want to run into a tree and ruin your beautiful face, now would we?” The sudden voice of the man you were thinking of, startles you back to reality along with the gentle touch of his arms around your shoulder, guiding you around a tree that you were seconds from walking straight into.
But all you could think about now was the presence of his warmth on your shoulder along with a word you had always longed to hear addressed to you–beautiful.
“Huh?” You ask a little frazzled, trying to control your breathing from his still present arms around you.
“You almost ran into the tree back there,” He smiles, now removing his arms from around your shoulders and awkwardly scratching the back of his head.
You both were now lagging behind the group who had finally joined back up with Yona and Hak. Yona sends you a quick thumbs up from afar, mouthing a ‘good luck,’ with a wink.
“Thank you,” you mumble to Jae-ha, ignoring Yona’s cheekiness, and continuing to walk to the rest of the group with your eyes glued to the ground. You couldn’t do it, you couldn’t tell him.
You hear the man sigh behind you before firm arms pick you up bridal-style, and jump into the air as you let out a yelp, instinctively wrapping your arms around his neck and hiding your face into his chest from being so high up. You were surprised that he was even able to lift you, but I guess all the dragons were fairly strong.
Your heart was hammering in your chest–both from the sudden action of being in the air, but also from being in close proximity to your crush. You could hear his own heart hammering in his chest, probably from having the fatigue of jumping while carrying something heavy (at least that’s what you think, his heart is definitely pounding for other reasons).
You can hear the distant joyful hollering of Yona and Zeno from afar, praising the green-headed man for his bold actions, to which Jae-ha chuckles at. It isn’t long until you’re safe on the ground again, far enough from the group now to have some privacy together. Jae-ha sets you down as you timidly scoot away from him and sit on the grass, trying to calm yourself down.
“What’d you do that for?” You ask hesitantly.
“A little bird told me that you’ve been talking down on yourself, is that true?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you avoid his eyes. You physically couldn’t look him in the eyes, you were far too embarrassed. Where had he heard that from?
He takes a seat beside you, gently reaching for a strand of your hair and admiring it as he twists it between his fingers. You’re frozen in shock. What was going on?
His hand abandons your hair and gently grabs your chin to face him as his other hand wraps around your waist.
“And I’d love to know where you heard that I wasn’t completely infatuated by your beauty,” he teases.
Your eyes widen in shock.
“In fact, I love every inch of you, from the plumpness of your thighs to the softness of your stomach, your magnificent chest, and your puffy cheeks. You’re absolutely enchanting– a diamond among stones,” he continues.
“Your eyes, they outshine the beauty of any other woman in this land, you know why? Because they belong to you. I don’t care how big you think you are, but never talk like that about yourself again.” There was a certain sternness behind his voice now, as if he was really serious and hurt that you would think so badly of yourself.
“How did you-”
“I heard everything last night, Y/N. You have no idea how much self-control it took for me to not just burst into that tent and tell you everything right then and there. But I’m here now, and I can’t move forward until you know how much I love you. You’re beautiful and I won’t have you think otherwise.”
You were beyond baffled.
“All this out of nowhere? You’re always off fawning over all the beauties in town, but never at me. You’re just saying this to make me feel better, right? Well, it’s okay. I do like you, Jae-ha, but I don’t need your pity. You don’t need to like me back, I’ll be o-”
You’re cut off by the feeling of Jae-ha’s lips on yours. You can feel the emotion behind them as he was almost desperate to show you how real his feelings for you were. You lean into him, wrapping your own arms around him now, fully into the steamy kiss.
He pulls aways with a pant, “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that,” he laughs. “I hope you believe me now.”
“And to answer your question, I didn’t want to scare you off. I know how bold I can be, and a part of me loved watching you from afar, loving, admiring you in secret. It was exhilarating trying not to get caught,” he confesses.
Yona’s words from that night echo in your head of how she had seen him watching you a few times. He really did like you…
“I’m surprised you never caught my wandering eyes. We need to work on you being more aware of your surroundings, darling. What if it was some other man gawking at you, and not me? Not that I’d let that happen…but still.” There he goes again with his teasing.
You playfully hit him on the shoulder, hiding your face in the crook of his neck, “Shut up,” you mumble, very embarrassed by all his words. You still couldn’t believe it, it was like all your dreams became a reality over-night.
Was this a dream? Because if it was, you never wanted to wake up. You cuddle further into him, hiding the heat that was quickly rushing to your face. You were overwhelmed, but in a good way. His own arms slither around you in a tight embrace.
“This is real right? You’re not just saying all this?”
“Of course this is all real, darling. And I’ll keep saying it all until you believe it. You’re under my care now,” He whispers that last part and leaves a peck to the top of your head.
“I’ll take good care of you,” he confirms again, making sure you know it.
REQUESTS ARE OPEN :D
Posted: 1/24/2023
#yona of the dawn#akatsuki no yona#yona of the dawn x reader#akatsuki no yona x reader#jae ha x reader#ryokuryuu jaeha#yotd x reader#akayona x reader#yona of the dawn x you#yona of the dawn x y/n#akatsuki no yona x you#akatsuki no yona x y/n#yotd x you#yotd x y/n#akayona x you#akayona x y/n#jae ha x you#jae ha x y/n#yona of the dawn fanfic#yona of the dawn oneshot#akatsuki no yona fanfic#akatsuki no yona oneshot#jae ha fanfic#jae ha oneshot#yona of the dawn fluff#jae ha fluff#akatsuki no yona fluff
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I just spent the whole evening reading what I thought was a stucky fic (from the tags), but it ended up with Bucky with someone else, and a heartbroken Steve. It was an old fic, and the author had recieved a lot of comments from other readers who felt decieved, but they were dismissed with the argument that fic readers are spoiled with tags and should learn that a story like real life can be unpredictable. The author had originally set out to write stucky but changed their mind half way so the end pairing came out of nowhere and didn’t really make sense with the build up. I didn’t comment, but I’m sitting here asking myself if I’m wrong to be angry. Obviously writers invest a lot more time writing a fic than I do reading it, but it still was my whole evening wasted on the opposite of what I wanted. What was supposed to make me feel good made me feel like shit, and I obviously really wanted to avoid that. I have always trusted tags, but from now on I might have to skip to the end before reading to make sure. Am I entitled?
Oh darling, I am so sorry that happened to you 😔 That is so sad and disheartening, especially if you were looking for something that would make you feel good. I 100% percent understand that it made you feel frustrated and even a little angry, and no, I don't think you're entitled in this case. I do believe that tagging is a courtesy and not a duty, and I also believe everyone is allowed to write and post whatever they want, regardless of what other people may or may not want to read.
Having said that, though, I personally think that making sure that a story is appropriately tagged, at least for major triggers and pairings, is the decent thing to do. The author of this fic could have easily updated the tags to have them reflect the plot twist for any future readers, and in doing that, they could have prevented a lot of people being left disheartened or sad at the end of it. However much I want people to read my stories, I personally would not want someone to read my fic and be triggered or saddened by something it contained. In that case, I'd much rather they just skipped it and read something else.
The idea of almost intentionally disappointing my readers is so counterintuitive to me, because a huge reason why I personally read fic is to feel better, so that's what I hope to offer other people with my own fic too, you know? Of course, I know lots of people love angst and even unhappy endings, because they're cathartic or just because they make them feel things, and that's perfectly fine, too. But in that case, reading those kinds is fics is a choice - and if a fic isn't properly tagged or if it professes to be something that it's not, then a potential reader is not able to make an informed decision, and I think that's misleading and quite disrespectful of the audience. It's not a crime, but it's not very nice, is what I'm trying to say.
This author's argument about how readers should learn that stories, like life, can be unpredictable is mind-boggling to me as well, because hello, surely it can't be news to them that reading (especially fanfiction) serves as a much needed escape from real life for lots and lots of people. I'm sure there are some who read books with the purpose of being surprised or caught off guard, but I think they're a minority tbh. And again, that should be a choice. Long story short: I don't think you're wrong to be frustrated in this case, and while I'm glad to hear you didn't comment and rant at the author like some people would, if I were you, I would personally steer clear of them and their work in the future. Sending you hugs, lovely, and I hope you find something new to read that gives you everything you're looking for soon! ❤️
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any chance for more what if emma doesn't die thoughts from you? I am filled with sorrow for her and Dean once more
ooh....you know for someone who has an obscenely long ghost emma wip I've never really considered if she just survived from the beginning hmm...
well obviously when sam barges in the room dean either manages to put himself in front of emma and talk him down, or, the sexier option, he shoots the gun out of sam's hand. sam still argues but dean is invoking oldest rule here lmao. I don't know if 'poughkeepsie' would apply here but I want him to drop a code word to guilt sam into letting emma come along
between his attitude and the whole 'pulling a gun on her' thing emma reasonably does not like sam right off the bat, so she's practically glued to dean like a shadow for the first couple weeks
(personally I think emma truly wanted to escape and didn't want to hurt anyone, I think she only pulled the knife bc she couldn't read dean and thought he wasn't gonna help her. so obviously that's. less of an issue here)
idk I just really like the idea of emma knowing How to fight but having more of a pacifistic nature, not really blending well with either sides of her family. like she didn't ask dean to protect her from the amazons so she could be a hunter. dean may not be able to give her a normal life while they're busy hiding from leviathans, amazons, and the us government, but he'll be damned if he's gonna force her into a fight or give her a gun. sam tries to convince emma to work as bait for the pennywhistle case and dean goes Nuclear
so once dean's comfortable letting her out of his sight for longer than half an hour she's usually on research or like, the get away driver lol
dean's 'never had enough money to get nice things for sammy' childhood guilt is manifesting aggressively he's buying stuff for emma every time he goes anywhere. whole back seat of the car is decked out with fluffy blankets and pillows, she's got her own collection of music, clothes, stuff like that. she definitely has more stuff than she should have considering they're living on the run but that's not gonna stop dean
sorry I just love the idea of sam constantly picking fights with her and dean being like. Why Do You Have Beef With My Newborn.
like I definitely think sam would warm up to her before the end of the season, especially after cas fixes his mind, but between the amy situation and his personal trauma about feeling like a monster his family should have hunted, I think he'd just. have a rough time with her at first. plus in no world does sam know how to communicate with teenage girls lmao
HOWEVER I don't think she'd stay with him while dean is trapped in purgatory. I think lowkey sam doesn't even really. Consider being her guardian or whatever bc he sees her as grown and capable, but also he's immediately trying to find a place to settle down and emma is like. what the fuck are you talking about none of this is finished???
so she takes off. she wants to find kevin to 1) make sure he's okay and 2) see if his prophet powers can help her figure out what happened to dean and cas. I think she should meet up with charlie!!! she figures if anyone can track down a missing person it'd be her, and we all know charlie's not gonna turn away kid wanting to save her parent.
they do find kevin (and linda!) and get them situated and do what they can to hide them from crowley. dean and cas eventually get out of purgatory the same way as in canon bc they couldn't really figure that out, but at least kevin wasn't abandoned all year and had a decent head start on figuring out the tablet. the four of them have a little clubhouse set up and charlie makes buffy the vampire slayer references or room of requirement jokes literally every day
this is pretty much all I've got right now, but I'm always filled with sorrow on emma's (and deans) behalf omg. someone please save her already
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life update :3 (a little vent-y)
sooo, been over 200 days since the house caught fire and we had to move. obviously, a lot of stuff's been happening. can't go into deep details for fear of someone I don't want to find this, finding this, but I'll say this much: FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've very rarely mentioned family on here (for obvious reasons - this account is NOT made for that lol) but here goes. tw for pretty heavy topics: mentions of abuse, father issues, health issues, transphobia & financial issues. I turned 18 Feb 21st, literally just almost 2 months before the damn house caught fire. Meanwhile, my brother's still a minor. MEANING, I narrowly escaped the custody battle my mom & dad are in. But unfortunately, he's still stuck in the middle of it. :( My pops was not really the nicest person to me when I was a kid -
whooping my ass whenever I did anything wrong, no matter how minor the offense was.
Telling me that he loved God more than he loved me, because "You're God's gift to me. God is the one who gave you to me in the first place," when I was four.
Telling me that if I didn't start being ok with receiving physical affection from family - which he knew made me uncomfortable - I was "going to grow up to be a S3R1AL K1LL3R" (yes he said that.)
Telling me that "God doesn't make mistakes," and that he "made me into a beautiful young woman for a reason" after I came out to him personally at 14 - big mistake 0/10 stars, would never do again. You get the idea. And those are the tame examples I could think of. So, I finally cut him off. As soon as my mom, brother, & I were in our new place, I blocked his number and haven't talked to him since. I was sick of him not respecting my boundaries, and repeatedly demonstrating that he thought of me as nothing more than a possession. Tired of him making me feel crazy all the time too. But now he's fucking with my mom & brother. Intentionally not paying child support till the last minute possible - & then making it in as small of payments at a time as he possibly can (yes he can afford it btw.) Trying to force my brother to go over to his place, even when my brother does NOT want to - which has begun giving my brother psychological issues & issues with school, mirroring the ones I used to struggle with bc of that bastard. My mom is juggling all sorts of things, & I really at least wanna try to help financially by getting a job, but I can't yet because: she says that I'm only 18, & shouldn't have to get a job to help out (I disagree.) I don't have an ID bc she wants me to wait on my legal name change - which costs a pretty decent chunk of change - reason is bc she "wants me to have as easy an early adulthood life as possible" (love her.) AND, I haven't actually graduated - No, I dipped in 11th bc school was hell (not exaggerating,) & instead just decided to pursue a GED, that I haven't been able to work towards bc of the shit show that is life in midwestern america. So I've been very depressed, exhausted, & hopeless. The least I can do is clean up our house while she's at work, & get this - some days I don't even have the physical energy to do THAT! I do not know what the hell is wrong with my body currently, but it absolutely sucks. & I'm really tired of just taking up space all the time. She's dealing with health issues too, & I'm always worried ab her. Idk what the hell to do, but something's gotta give. Everybody needs a fucking break. I keep trying to shoo away all the dark thoughts, push myself as often as possible, & keep my fingers crossed, but jfc... Sorry just needed to yell into the void for a sec. I'll live, I'm sure - I've survived worse. Sometimes things just suck. But I like to think that someday they won't. :,)
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Hi! Hope you're having a great new year!
I've been wondering lately what Team S' breaking point would be. What would they do when they reach their breaking point. Would they kill someone or kidnap their darling? Or just do something drastic in general.
I think Sonics breaking point would be his darling escaping over and over again (after already being kidnapped). Though I'd say the most he'd do in that situation is just chain his darling to the bed by their ankle. He'd probably still have it long enough for you to walk around the house but short enough that you can't get close to the front door. I can imagine him checking and rechecking every window to make sure that they're still locked (he padlocked them) and to make sure they haven't been tampered with. He'd feel absolutely terrible that things lead to this but he believes it's for your own good.
"I'm sorry, okay? But you could get hurt out there! What if Eggman saw you and decided to roboticize you?! I can't allow that."
Shadow might snap because his darling gets badly hurt by a hitman. It's not life-threatening but still pretty bad (for example, being shot in the arm). He'd probably go mental and beat the ever-loving hell out of them before demanding them to say who assigned them the job. He'd probably circle the Moon and back if it meant finding this person. Unfortunately for his darling, they'd most likely never be allowed to go outside again unless he was around (assuming it was outside, plus you'd have to try and convince him for days to just go out for a while).
"You do remember the last time you went out, right? ....................fine.. I need to get something from the store anyways. Do not leave my side or this'll be the last time you go out. "
Since Sliver is clingy and obsessive, I'd say his breaking point would be his darling giving him the cold shoulder for weeks on end. It's one thing for his darling to be somewhere else for a few weeks, but the fact that you're right there and not giving him any attention would drive him insane. This is especially if you won't even look at him much less talk to him. He's absolutely heartbroken and he's convinced you hate him because of something he did. He would try everything he could just to get a reaction from you, poking, tickling, hugging, hell he'd probably cling onto to your leg until you say something or get him off somehow. He wouldn't do much but eventually he might snap and shake you a bit with his telekinesis out of pain and frustration. He'd immediately put you down once he sees that panicked look on your face and apologises about a thousand times. Out of guilt he might leave you alone for the rest of the day, he's hardly able to look you in the eyes without feeling bad.
"Please look at me, y/n. What ever I did wrong I know I can fix it! Just tell me what to do and I'll do it, okay? Please....just love me again."
Let me know what you think! :)
🔮~ anon
Hello! I'm having a decent new year so far & I hope you're having a great new year dear!
I barely know what to say or write or even add to this masterpiece that you've sent.
I've always viewed Sonic as, though a reasonable individual, is quick to act on impulse & my brain reasons that his breaking point would be from his paranoia that builds up. What if you get hurt? What if Eggman kidnaps you? What if you end up being used against him? Or worse, robotized!? He can't have that, no! No! No! I've stated in a earlier post that because of Sonic's impulsiveness, Sonic wouldn't really consider how you might feel (at the moment) & is quick to panic when you panic.
I see your Shadow's breaking point being y/n getting severely hurt, & I raise you, y/n nearly getting killed. Both scenarios perfectly showcase his protectiveness & how far he takes it (y'know, kidnapping & all) but I feel like you nearly dying would just cause something in him to snap, something telling him he can't fully trust the world now. Shadow would also willingly get whatever you need if asked, craving a certain food/dish? He out & about in the nearest market getting the food/ingredients. Need more clothes to wear? He'll look at your article of clothes & check the sizes before heading out. Need some sunlight? Either you let him go with you or you can take some vitamin D pills to assist.
I don't have much to say about Silver because your part on him is beyond spot on. Though I will say I like that you put that he might use his telekinesis on us when frustrated & clearly not thinking straight &, though knowing it was unintentional, he'd beat himself up for it. When you do see him again, he just has the saddest kicked puppy eyes you'd ever seen that would make you feel absolutely shitty. I feel like he'd unintentional gaslight you which would just lead to you giving him all of your attention which he is more than happy to receive.
#grizz responds#yandere#yandere concept#yandere sonic the hedgehog#yandere shadow the hedgehog#yandere silver the hedgehog#sonic the hedgehog#sth#not yandere writing#🐋 anon
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Sorry for sending too many zooble asks I'm a bit too autistic for them
Anyway uhhh. Hcs or thoughts about the way zooble interacts with other cast members or what she thinks of them pls? 👉👈 we saw them interact with jax, pomni and kinger briefly but that wasn't much and I've been thinking about all that tbh
Zooble interactions!
this one may be on the shorter side (and also indulging in one of my zooble ships ueue) since im feeling a little ouuwuwuuuooo wuu right now also dont feel bad for requesting for zooble! i totally get it! obviously this is based around speculation since we only have the pilot and they were absent for most of it so uhuh though i guess that goes with this entire acc as a whole
Jax- as much as i wanna say they hate each other, the more i think about the more i can see them having a love/hate friendship going on. like they arent buddy buddy, but there probably exists some moments where they can agree on something and perhaps even work together in a decent duo. though it is rare you see them interacting and hanging out one on one
Pomni- weirdly enough i think zooble would be sympathetic to pomni, given her freak out when she first landed in the digital circus and her wanting to escape instantly. do i think zooble was the same when they got stuck? not exactly, but hey that's something else. as for actual interactions, i think if they got to interact more one on one i think the constant anxiousness from pomni would get on their nerves, since they're more of a "this is how things are now and theres nothing that can be done to change our fate, so its better to just accept it" person (at least thats how i read them)
Ragatha- finds ragatha to be one of the most tolerable of the group thanks to ragatha just. being kind to others and understanding. they stay in their own lanes for the most part, but zooble knows if they need something they can go to ragatha for a hand!
Kinger- torn between saying they hold a grudge over the gloink thing or not. i feel like it would be a baby grudge, like they dont think about it every single day and they can still talk to kinger without thinking about it but when they DO remember they get a lil mad. as for actual relationships, they would probably find kinger's antics irritating (namely the screams) so i don't think they would hang out with him much either
Gangle- wife/j no but ive been thinking about gangle x zooble since i was introduced to it because i genuinely do love the idea of them so much i wanna make more ideas for these two. anyways! these two hang out a lot, actually if you're looking for one you should probably try looking for the other since odds are the one you need isn't too far off. as stated in a previous post gangle is the only person allowed in zoobles room. love these two
Caine- neutral, i think, at the end of the day. i mean its not like caine forces them to do things they dont want to do (caine goes out of his way to tell zooble that they dont have to participate in the pilots in house adventure, so caine is more than willing to listen to input from the members i think) (ignoring the fact that zooble got 'napped by the gloinks, but i dont think caine sicked them on zooble)
#tadc#the amazing digital circus x reader#digital circus#zooble#tadc zooble#zooble headcannons#tadc headcannon
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Part 24
Masterlist
Series masterlist
Part 23 🍂 Part 25
Pairing: Syverson x ofc
Series summary: Life with Sy, what more can you wish for? The most amazing husband and father to a whole litter of cute little kids... Sometimes you wonder "how did you get here?"
Chapter warnings: Sy's big-ass family.
Word count: 1.3k
A/N: @keanureevesisbae, as promised, I bring thee: Ch 24. I'm making y'all wait for 25 until I have 27 written. Sorry ❤️
@deandoesthingstome @geralts-yenn @omgkatinka @summersong69 @beck07990 @peaches1958 @sillyrabbit81 @ellethespaceunicorn
Jules started her little speech by thanking everyone for showing up at her engagement party, and thanking you – and Sy – for letting her use your house, which subjected you to the scorn of your mother-in-law again. Alright; subjected Sy to the scorn of his mother again. You were largely unaffected by the aforementioned scorn.
“As you may know,” Jules continued, “Pat hates being the center of attention for the whole night, and I’m a sucker for planning surprises for people.” You felt Sy tense up next to you as she said that.
“And it just so happens that someone very important to all of us…” Jules was laying the praise on thick, which Sy didn’t seem to appreciate. It took you far too long to realize where she was even going with this. “… turns thirty next week.”
Sy looked at Julie as if he wanted to shoot her straight to hell, and you sighed, as there was now officially no way you could make yourself scarce. There was singing, then another round of singing, specifically because Sy had begged everyone to stop singing, and following that had to be an attempt at the World Record for ‘most consecutive times a single person could hear the word ‘congratulations’ before going batshit crazy.’
You surprised Sy’s family with a sudden outburst of Dutchness when you congratulated Sy’s parents with Sy’s birthday, and were then forced to explain that it was a thing the Dutch did, without being able to give any kind of even half-decent reason as to why. Finding out you were Dutch also meant that a small army of kids now forced you to teach them some Dutch words, which started out cute, but soon turned into the inevitable ‘translate this swearword for me’-fiasco anyone with any braincells would have seen coming from the beginning. All in all, it took a while for things to settle down a bit again, and you were glad when the kids had disappeared back into the crowd.
“Love kids, but thirteen of them is a lot.” You said to Sy when he helped you find a place to sit down for a minute.
“I’d ask if you’re feeling any better yet, but I don’t think that whole circus really helped,” he said as he stroked a few curls out of your face and tucked them behind your ear, where they immediately escaped again, making Sy laugh. “Let me get you a drink.”
“Thanks, Sy,” you said, grabbing his hand as he got up to head to the kitchen.
While Sy was gone, you closed your eyes, and tried to ignore everyone around you, which became impossible when Mary Beth joined you on the couch.
“Lara, sweetheart, would I be a whole lot of trouble if I asked you to hold Lainey for a minute?”
“No, of course not!” You hadn’t even finished your sentence, or the little girl was in your arms.
“Thanks, honey,” Mary Beth said softly, “I love her to bits, but my arms are gettin’ sore.”
“I can imagine,” you said. Lainey was adorable. Nine months old with enormous blue eyes, and little hands and feet and… Her mom was gone. Probably off to the bathroom, but still, you prayed she’d get back just in case Lainey decided to start crying…
“Hey, how’s my favorite niece?” Sy sat down next to you and wrapped one arm around you as he tickled Lainey with the other.
“I thought I was your favorite niece, uncle Sy?” One of the other girls had heard what he said and jumped into his lap.
“Y’are,” Sy said, “and so are the twins.”
“That’s not fair,” one of the boys yelled. Suddenly, you were being ganged up on by children. It was scarier than you would have imagined.
“You’re not my niece, Johnny,” Sy answered with a smile, and the kids laughed at their uncle’s terrible joke before disappearing again.
“You said somethin’bout this lookin’ good on me, Sugar,” Sy said softly as he pressed his lips to your temple, “but I gotta admit, it looks pretty damn fine on you, too.”
You allowed yourself to get lost in that feeling for a bit. It was like a little glimpse into your future; sitting on that couch with Sy, holding a baby…
“Dammit, Sy, I want one,” you heard yourself say, although you were sure you’d never made the conscious decision to actually speak the words. In fact, you’d never thought you’d hear yourself utter a sentence like that at all. Ever. The look on Sy’s face said it all, but he doubled down on it with words.
“As many as you want, Sugar,” he said before kissing you. The loving and intimate energy of the moment was skillfully destroyed by half a dozen children yelling “eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew” the moment Sy’s lips touched yours.
“Good Lord, you’d think it would traumatize them forever,” Mary Beth said after shooing the kids away. Now that her spot on the couch was taken, she sat down in the chair next to you. “I’ll take her again, if you want.” She held out her arms, but you really didn’t want to let go of Lainey just yet.
“It’s alright, she’s asleep, anyway,” you said. Mary Beth seemed more than grateful to have her hands free for a bit longer, and you didn’t mind that you got to cuddle with this cutie a little more. Besides, your stomach finally seemed to settle a little, but you still hoped that holding a sleeping baby would keep people away from you for a bit.
It all went on like that for quite some time, and by the time people started leaving, you’d been praying they would for at least three hours. Sy was merciless in kicking his brothers – who were now fairly drunk – out of the house, and with them gone, peace was restored. Wait, no. Scratch that: quiet was restored. Peace, to you, was a house that didn’t look like a miniature tornado had ripped through it.
“Take a shower and go to bed, Sugar,” Sy said. He could clearly tell you still weren’t feeling very well – and he was one hundred per cent right about that, it’s just that you’d much rather he join you for both of those activities. “I’m gonna help Jules clean up this mess.” Jules didn’t look too thrilled that she was being roped into cleaning duty – something she had surely hoped to avoid by not hosting this party herself, but you knew she wasn’t so stupid as to actually expect she’d be let go just like that. Even with Sy’s mom doing you the courtesy of stacking the dishwasher before she left, there was still plenty to be done.
“Since when does your family leave deviled eggs uneaten?” Jules asked while she carried a plate with two sad-looking eggs back to the kitchen. “Lara, want one?” As soon as she held the plate out to you, you stepped back. Julie made a whole scene out of pointing out you loved deviled eggs – as if you’d forget that – but with your stomach as upset as it was right now, they just made you feel sick.
“Let her go upstairs, Jules,” Sy said. There was definitely some irritation in his voice, and you were one hundred percent sure he wanted Jules and Pat out of the house as soon as humanly possible, so he could get to bed, too. “She’s not feeling well. Just… help me clean up my damn house.”
Jules followed his orders immediately, which was a very un-Jules thing to do, and you made your way upstairs. First stop: bathroom. The thought of a hot shower was almost excruciatingly appealing to you right now.
#syverson x ofc#syverson#captain syverson fanfiction#captain syverson#syverson fanfiction#syverson fluff#cpt syverson#syverson fic#henry cavill characters#henrycavill fanfic#henry cavill fanfiction#henry cavill
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this is so random but i would love to hear your opinion on mydramalist as a fellow asian drama lover. because it’s obviously well known as a reliable wiki of sorts in dramaland but i beg to differ. (the only plus i feel being the summary and cast list for info)
i mean, i’ve not seen a single comsec w more than two brain cells as a whole? there’s always complaints about female leads rooted from misogyny, they are never happy about story progression, and i just find so many of them kinda dumb sorry lol. like zero media literacy to be found, insufferable arguments, etc. the star ratings are rly just given to popular dramas w high profile actors too.
and i personally find it disheartening that so many ppl end up referring to mdl when considering dramas because so many gems are then lost and not given appreciation.
anon. anon anon anon if you know the way i sat straight the f*ck up when i saw the notification and then read through this ask bc yes. yes to everything here that is exactly it. almost three fourths of what i've watched this year was either 1. not received well by the general MDL crowd (Moon in the Day. where is the taste brethren to not like MITD and not even for reasons that actually make sense), 2. received well but had a good chunk of people bitching in the comment section, or 3. received well but had the main point of the show (and its relevant characterization) go over their heads. (The Worst of Evil aka TWOE comment section, i am f*cking looking at you. i can count on one hand the number of people who understood what that show was supposed to be about) the one fourth that managed to escape was bc the toxicity did not reach the comment section and everyone was pretty f*cking civil. alas if only it could be like that all of the time
case in point for the ratings example, since we've already briefly tackled the lack of media literacy—j-dramas on MDL are notoriously rated much, much lower than either k- or c-dramas. half of the time that's bc there are less users watching (and rating) them therefore the average is lower but the other half it's bc people simply do not understand good media when they see it. don't get me wrong there's some freaky ass sh*t in the j-drama world that i would not touch with a Grinch level pole but to see MDLers out here talking about how slow j-dramas are and that nothing's happening. have you considered that you are either watching the wrong genre or you shouldn't be watching j-dramas in the first place bc their entire setup and general narrative framing arcs are not your style. have you even thought about that for six seconds or are you too busy expecting it to read like a typical tropey rom-com k-drama with your trending oppas. (no hate on my tropey rom-coms with [most of] said oppas, i need them when i don't want to think i just want to see sh*t on my screen and scream about hot people and the Hand Umbrellas in the Rain and the Back Hold when the male lead catches the female lead before she falls and you have the fifteen second focus on their faces just looking at each other)
and the misogyny. oh God do not get me started on the dichotomy that was the Cult, as we affectionatly called ourselves, on the feeds while THEE sageuk of the year My Dearest was airing (beloved show [that i still need to finish. JangChae i'm sorry ily life hates me like the mf it is 😭], beloved commentary on the feeds. they saw the vision on the feeds) vs the sh*tshow that was the landmine field of the comment section (the takes i saw on Gil Chae, Eun Ae AND Ryang Eum respectively.......... the misogyny wasn't enough we had to add the homophobia into the mix. buy one get one free deal fr fr). you mad man. that sh*t was insane there was a point i banned myself from scrolling farther than the cast section until the show finished airing. i kid you not on average they didn't have even half a braincell. maybe a quarter of a quarter of one. f*cked up just say you are not decent people and go
this is not to say that all of MDL is like this. i have gotten tuned into absolute masterpieces of content (and have tuned others, amen) bc of a comment comparing a show i'm watching to another one or a review being posted in the feeds about a film with less than 500 people interested. i have reconsidered my choice to not watch something after having spirited discussions in private messages discussing the pros and cons of the premise and whether they managed to get it done without f*cking sh*t up. i still contribute semi-regularly by adding relatively unknown actors and crew members to the database so they can get the credit due them. if you know where to look, you can get some good sh*t out of that place. problem is most users who are new to both the site and East/Southeast Asian cinema as a whole don't know where to look, and the cycle continues, and the ratings continue to be skewed/bloated and no one pays attention to the plot, if there even is any to pay attention to.
tl;dr: begging people to not let MDL be the be all end all for their drama recs a la 'well MDL doesn't like it so i won't watch it'. babe we have said MDLers complaining about how the ratings on Viki are too high but in my entire time watching dramas i've found that in the past two to three years the Viki ratings are making more sense than the MDL ones. sit with that for a sec. when you're done branch out and see the world (literally and cinematically), i promise you will be a better person for it
#inbox#q: anon#mydramalist#mdl#kdrama#not what i expected to see this Friday but i needed to see it#anon love this got a bit long i'm sorry i am just. Passionate about this subject as you can tell#honestly istg the only reason i still use MDL is to track my sh*t. plus i obsessively organized my profile page and i am not letting that#go to waste no ty#i feel like the Asian drama fandom over here on Tumblr are just. slightly more normal somehow. also you'll get f*ckingly long analyses#on shows that will have you face down on the ground shot in six different places taken apart etc etc#situations like these are when i'm grateful that Bollywood is not available on MDL bc the takes with even less than a quarter of#a quarter of a braincell that i would have to deal with then........... God loves me that's why it hasn't happened#also. the Caribbean seeped into this once again let me explain. 'you mad man' is a Dominican (DM not DR) phrase. it has nothing#to do with the 'you mad?' in the African American community that is an entirely separate thing. 'you mad' here means 'you crazy?'#or 'bitch you ain't serious'. could have also said 'you too have limyé' but that would need another paragraph by itself to explain#bc of the Dominican specific context and this is not the kweyol/patois class session today sksksksk
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Here's the objective, factual— if you disagree you're a mook—Cartoon Cat song tier list (/J, this is my personal ranking)
Explanation (going down from the tiers)
S Tier
Toon Catastrophe: I love this song, incredibly catchy with some good lyrics, not what I feel like a standard CC song should be but I think that works for it really well. I think the grim and depressing lyrics about how absolutely fucked you are while this snappy catchy beat really adds to it, there's also a decent part of humor with the humans characters in the song acting casual about this eldtritch monstrosity saying "maybe he needs the ol' litter box!". This part could make some people dislike the song yet I feel like it being goofy actually fits because CC is powerful but having him be a goofy element to his sinister presence does wonders. Not to mention this moment DOES NOT LAST and a few minutes later CC himself sings and comes out with STRAIGHT BARSthat give me chills:
"You can tiptoe and run all you want! I'm on the prowl, and I'm just being blunt but you're lookin' delicious, you're lookin' nutritious, you're probably going to sleep with the fishes! Cartoon Cat, I'm the Cartoon Cat, I'm the one and only, imagine that! The flavor of human is truly divine, let's count down the seconds before you die"
Only for CC to do a whispery countdown and then it goes back to singing. THATS STRAIGHT FIRE deserved top of S-tier plus the visuals look great with CC being stylized but still pretty accurate to Mr. Henderson's works, his walk cycle is pretty eerie and I love that too.
Run Away: it's fucking crazy this is 4 years old and it still holds up. The voice they give CC has been exactly how it sounds in my head since I've watched this It's one of my favorite voices for him with it being incredibly snarky and playful but still sinister. The entire song is essentially CC going on about how he's going to catch you and eat you which granted isn't very creative but with the rhythm so good it doesn't need to be. The simple lyrics work for it as well so the lack of creativity regarding the song doesn't matter, not to mention the bit after the second chorus utilizing a piano has to be my favorite parts. Overall good rhythm and in general solid.
A Tier
I honestly believe both entires in A tier are great and it was hard to put them down here, I wanted to put them both in S and it was a kinda 3-way tie with Run Away being considered to be put down here but ultimately I chose against it.
Tapes of Old: "but this isn't a Cartoon Cat song! It's a cartoon dog song–" SHUT UP MY TIER LIST MY RULES! SHUSH! SHHHH! Sorry but I actually really love this song, it doesn't really paint CD as a "good guy" like some people love to HC him as being the good version of CC meant to kill CC. Instead CD is just another creature with immense power who hates CC and they've had an eternal battle spanning across forever, it's been so long they don't even know why they fight they merely do, it's LITERALLY like cats and dogs. CD is pretty goofy looking in the video yet this works great and the run cycle of him on all fours sprinting creeps me out and if I saw that running at me oh yeah no that would be fucking terrifying. There's a specific section of the song that I believe implies CC and CD are harmonizing as well? Like after the second chorus there's a bit where it goes "our fight continues on and on! It keeps on going, never done! I keep thinking that cat is gone but it tells me RUN, RUN, RUN! it's a cycle I cannot escape, chasing forever this cat and a day, I refuse to take this as my fate! Some day I will put down the stray!". I heavily believe this is both of them singing at once with CD taking over only briefly to talk about the cat not dying, but the part where it goes "some day I will put down the stray!" It switches between the animation of CC walking and CD walking with "stray" being a neutral term for an animal with both calling the other a stray. The shared hatred and story these lyrics give make it soooo good plus it's fun to listen to, yeah once again struggled to put it down here in A.
Masquerade: also once again, I didn't really want to put this in A nor put this below Tapes of Old or Run Away as I believe these 3 are pretty on par with one and another. I bit the bullet though and this song? Although I don't believe it's the BEST CC song, it's my FAVORITE because the lyrics are once again aren't overly creative similar to Run Away and it's merely talking about how he's gonna get ya and you can't hide ya know. I will say though the title of the song and the tagline lyrics "After my little masquerade", I specifically love this masquerade line as it's a reference to the fact that CC isn't a cat nor cartoon. It's one giant act in order to latch onto this world and he just loves pretending to be one because he's something that is god-like. This is especially reflected in the lyrics that paints a real sense of hopelessness as while he also talks about killing he also does a good job demonstrating why running is pointless saying "Oh I have so much power!" Or "oh you don't know what I can do, especially to prey like you". This confidence combined with the voice they gave CC that's echoey and generally emotionless is so good as it once again paints a very vivid picture this is a mere game to him, all of it including your life means nothing to him and you're only alive because he's having fun. He doesn't need to worry about a thing, you're in his sights and it's over. Not to mention the visuals? OOOO, the SFM CC model is the perfect blend between fanon CC and canon CC being a weird middle ground that I think is perfect. I especially love how his ears look furry but their not, like the rest of his body it's pure rubber and it's just him trying to sell the bit of being a cartoon cat. Also towards the end of the song it shows CC commanding several other Mr. Henderson creations which granted isn't realistic as they all stay away from CC and CC also minds his own business, but this idea of him commanding over these twisted creatures kinda like an even more fucked up Bill cipher tickles me in a way I can't describe (and has also inspired an au of mine!). I love this song, sorry.
B tier
While these are good I wouldn't say they are in any way on the same level as A-tier because A-tier holds two songs which only BARELY didn't make the cut to be S and in all reality was more of a 3-way tie.
Curiosity Don't Kill This cat: I don't got much to say, lyrics are pretty standard as you'll see for all of these songs however one thing I will say though I love the much more ominous tone CC has. It feels like the standard for a song about him but other than masquerade I think this is the only one that does it hold throughout the entire song. Also I love the various jokes thrown in throughout the song like "I'm not some hello kitty!" Or "has cat got your tongue!", cat puns are par for the course yet I feel like this song is the only one that fully utilizes them. The beginning is pretty cute I will make a note on that with a kinda jingle for theoretical cartoon featuring CC, a cutesy version of him is also drawn on there which is adorable. The only last thing I will say is like all of these this pretty catchy with the part I keep replaying being "come over and watch me smile bigger, I'm walking on two paws towards my dinner, you're messing with fate and I'm all for it, curiosity don't kill this cat!". It's good overall with the visuals not having too much to comment on other than CC doing the funkiest little wave.
Outrun This Cat: looking back I actually think is pretty good than I first thought? Idk why I put it down so low this belongs in at least low A-tier I'm a fucking moron. Uhh starters the visuals have CC looking ugly as hell which works, ya know he ain't supposed to be pretty and the bloody gums sell this. As he's singing he's also very expressive, his entire body contorting or swaying using a mallet and pulling out a watch at one point. As much as I love ominous slow hunter CC the upbeat, energetic, and chaotic version holds a place in my heart. Towards the end of the song there's also a part with a toon version of CC and normal monstrous looking CC and I find this cool as the idea he can be either form but chooses the more horrific one funny. The lyrics are also solid, once again the standard of "you're gonna die" is set yet I think there is some cleverness like "better run for your life like a rat or it shreds you up instead", which btw the lyrics say "shredders" which I think is an intentional misspelling as it's a mix between shreds and cheddar because ya know, rat? Idk I find it funny shut up, but also the line "you're life on the line, it simply can't compare against my nine!". Nothing Shakespeare level ofv but still pretty good in my opinion, also the song has a bit of story with CC hating humans stating "there is no use for your urbanity, humanity drives mad my sanity" which I think is supposed to come with the implication that he was a cartoon abandoned which is why he hates people as this is supported by the lyric "abanonded in 2D—too bad i jumped to 3D!". Overall catchy and honestly really good than the ranking I gave it—heck there's a remix of this song made by "Mautzi" that features some FUCKING AWESOME THUMBNAIL ART, but also the way they remixed it would probably make it S-tier and beating Cartoon Catastrophe.
C Tier
He's The Cartoon Cat: I don't know, the song on paper isn't bad and I think the beat drop towards the end IS FUCKING INSANE AND CRAZY, but that singular great part doesn't make up for the rest of it being kinda a drag? I will say the optimism in the song only for the build up to the beat drop is phenomenal with the "run... Run... Run away!" Slowly distorting is a nice touch and makes it feel like the song was made by CC himself and hes intentionally trying to strike fear into the listener. Once again one good part doesn't make the entire good thing though yet in no way a bad song.
D tier
Kitty Kitty: I love rockit music yet they are a truly hit or miss nerdcore artist(s), this one sadly misses. Like it's not bad or at least not that bad, if I were listening to it on a playlist and it came on I wouldn't skip it, yet it wouldn't be something intentionally play, ya know? Like not a song I'd search for but if it comes up I'll vibe to it. I think the lyrics here are actually worse than Run Away in terms of nothingness though, it doesn't have that good of a beat to support these nothing lyrics making it suffer drastically. Once again, Rockit music has cooked some of my FAVORITE nerdcore songs but this one ain't it sadly.
That's about it, I ain't got no more tiers. All CC songs have their own merits with a few having somethings that just personally wasn't for me but I'm sure is someone else's cup of tea. That's the last song and there's no more, no more songs left. Anyways ramble over and Toon Buffoon out.
#cartoon cat#trevor henderson cartoon cat#CC nerdcore music#music#tier list#rambles from toon#im not gonna explain why i hate horror skunx or bad karma#maybe if im irrationally angry enough later I'll go off but i just can't
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i'm so sorry to see that you're being vagueposted about for your sylki takes. it may be true that how you see sylki is a bit different than a certain section of the fandom, but that doesn't at ALL mean that you shouldn't be allowed to have your own takes! fwiw, i followed you bc i actually agree with and really enjoy ur perspective on sylki. i was getting frustrated with how many people seem to view this ship in a super heteronormative way and want sylvie to basically become a housewife, and i was so glad to find a blog that felt the same way. this fandom has become tiring tbh with how many people are now freaking out that sylvie hasn't immediately started having lokis babies in s2, and i really wish that people would at least leave room for others to have their own opinions!
this! that section of sylki shippers do not leave any room for you to have your opinions! they act like a fanon police controlling what you say in your posts on your blog!
and god forbid that what you say opposes their own hcs and takes, if you commit this unforgivable sin of having a take that is different from theirs, you better be ready for some good old online group harassment! they will make you feel like you are not welcome in this fandom, they will make sure that you are hurt, they will alienate you and force you out!
but no, you are the bad guy for jokingly calling a fandom in general "vanilla" and saying (after several disclaimers that it's your personal opinion) that when it comes to canon, you don't think that sylvie should be all about being loki's housewife.
at this point i honestly hate this fandom. there are some decent sylkis out there and i love the ship itself, but a big portion of the fandom has simply sucked all the joy for the series out of me. i wonder if they realize what the consequences of their behavior could be? back when i said (in my blog) that i don't think sylvie having babies is a compelling completion of her story in canon, and this bunch came to my blog to harass me for my takes, i was in a very *very* bad place already, and the space that was supposed to be my escape pretty much turned on me and added up to an already depressing state i was in.
and bfr anyone says that it's just a fandom wank, let me tell you that these people know how to be really cruel, whether they realize it or not, their behavior is simply cruel. they don't just argue in favor of their opinion, they shit on you personally, get aggressive towards you personally, make you feel like you "can't sit with them", ect. it gets really creepy and ugly.
and the thing is, i never addressed anyone specific in my posts, i never said *this* person and *that* person have shitty hcs/takes, i never even vaguely hinted at a distaste towards the hcs/takes of someone specific, but they accuse me of pointing fingers. when i said that i didn't think canon sylvie having babies would work, i never said anything about sylki babies in fanfiction, yet people accused me of pointing fingers at the fic writers. and they would come to my blog, harass me in the replies and asks, and talk about how despicable i am in their own blogs, and it went on and on for a while.
thanks for your nice words, anon, they are uplifting. and to those who can't stand me so much, don't worry, i'm going to leave this fandom once the series is finished. i hope you are satisfied that being a shitty, gatekeeping, narrow-minded, egocentric person worked for you! but don't ever feel entitled to complain about how lokius shippers treat you.
#asks#sylki#sylvie laufeydottir#loki#i regret ever getting invested in this fandom i really really regret it#learn from my mistakes my friends#unfortunately a lot of your mutuals aren't actually your friends#they are going to turn your time in the fandom into hell if you dare to voice your unpopular opinion/hc on your own blog!#i had mutuals harass me and ppl i thought as friends not come to my aid bc of nonexistent sylki babies lmao#anyways anyways#you win! good job at forcing the last sylki who has unpopular takes/hcs out of the fandom!#you could have just muted or blocked me but i guess it was your duty to make sure it was clear that sylki fandom hates me!#oh & thank you for destroying my desire to ever read a sylki fic vanilla or not bc i can't be sure that it's not written by someone who#felt so insecure bc of my hcs that they decided to ruin the fandom experience for me!#mf i never insulted your fic i'm sure i have never even read it i was simply ranting about what i would like to read in case there was#someone wondering if there would be an audience for that sort of thing#and i never told you not to hc sylki/sylvie a certain way when i ranted on my blog how i don't think housewife!sylvie would work in canon!#but deep down you know that you just don't want anyone to have a different hc/take#again don't worry! you won! hope you are happy!#actually you managed to destroy my desire to be in any fandom ever! i should replace fandom with grass-touching bc maybe the lack of said#grass-touching is the reason some of you think everything is about you and targets you and your precious hcs#god i just cant stop thinking regretful i am for getting invested in this fandom when so many shippers turned out so hypocritical bad peopl#maybe one good thing that may come out of this is some poor soul reading it and getting a reality check regarding twitter/tumblr fandoms#DON'T GET ATTACHED THESE PPL WILL HARASS YOU AND HURT YOU OVER MADE-UP BABIES#it's not worth it! prioritize your mental health!#i have wasted so much of my time defending sylkis from the antis here & on twt only to have the majority of them turn on me#i want my time back god i really want all that wasted time back#why are you mfs sending me angry asks i told u that u won i'm leaving this fandom what more do u want from me?!#im not wasting my life in the fandom where the mfs would harass a real person bc of their parasocial relationship with hc babies#be content with hurting and forcing a person out of the fandom bc u took smtng that wasn't targeted at u too personally
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TL;DR : As if there's not enough drama in the fandom. As if there is no toxicity in the fandom.. probably the worst timing ever to confess something. Because again there's always something negative about me apparently. So let's get over with it. I'm Yelena and this me addressing myself about everything in very long post. I'm sorry for everything. And whatever you like me or don't, i wish you the best. 💖🩷
But even my understanding has its own limits. My compassion has its limits. Because that's a way of advertising about something that is important. And there's a way of being a bully that just want to make people feel bad because for many reasons. Because if someone is not following the "right " path or not saying the exact words like many people are saying, is just morally wrong and somehow the villains of the society. Can people have a different opinions of many topics and issues and still be friends along with disagreements? Can people acknowledge that people are not their government ? Can people accept the complexity of other people and the environment that they are in?
So I'm Yelena aka yelenasbuddie and I think that my silence is conforming to what people had said about me, that I'm that person. And first I'd like to say that I'm sorry for desiving you with pretending to be someone else. It was wrong and unethical to you guys. I feel like if I'll try to explain myself to you guys ,I'll come as someone who is trying to make an weak excuses and perhaps I'll be pointed as someone who is trying to manipulate you to see me as a victim. I, by making this post, let them win the game. But honestly, they didn't break me. Because by their actions, I learned their true colors. I honestly thought that they were caring a good heart and having sincere interests about fighting for human rights for Palestinian people and maybe having some criticism about the war and Israeli government. Thought they might not have understood the complexity of this ongoing conflict through many aspects. I did and still do separate the political views and the personality. After all, we do share some things in common, which are the fandom and our love for the show and for buddie and some silly things and positivity and etc.. So I kept following those people who are part of the fandom and clearly are supportive of the Palestinian people. And I never came at them for that matter in chats or asks anonymously. I only created a new account with a different name because mostly I didn't want those people to come after my mutuals or other people for associated with me. Even though my blog is apolitical and buddie and 911 centered.
I'm choosing my battles, and tumblr is my escapism. Therefore, my escapism has no moral values. I just filtered those posts that relate to the Israel-Palestinian conflict. So I won't have to unfollow people knowing their opinions on this.
Well, I'll admit that zionist is a strong word for me, and I honestly don't feel like it. I take that as being patriotic, which truthfully doesn't describe me at all. I'm just a little girl who tries to live the best life in a very, very difficult world. Although I do believe in Jewish people right to self-determination and for having a safe place. And for some people, that belief is enough to identify me as a zionist. And absolutely in no shape of form, I would agree to suffering Palestinian people and killing them in the name of zionism. I believe in Palestinian people's rights for liberation and self-determination as well. If there's a genocide in Gaza, I won't support that. No decent human being would support genocide at any kind. What is happening in Gaza is so heartbreaking, and my heart goes out for the families and children. At the same time, I won't support the dehumanizing of Jewish people and Israeli people. The same goes for dehumanizing Palestinian people. Even today, I still believe that there are innocent people in Gaza who just want to live a peaceful life, and yes, the Israeli government and military are too harsh in their responses and actions. I really wish that the war would stop soon along with the return of hostagers and ending the suffering of the Palestinian people. I didn’t choose this war, just like I hope many Palestinian people didn't choose this as well. I just happened to be an Israeli because well I moved here from Ukraine simply because of my parents' search for a better life quality for me as a girl with CP. Which is honestly it's true that Israel has better qualifications when it comes to people with disabilities wellbeing in comparison of Ukraine. It's definitely not perfect, but really, is there any other perfect country? If I had stayed in Ukraine, I wouldn't have had so many accomplishments as I have so far now. And that's not really in the name of zionism for myself and my family. But it was an easy way for us to move in another country without having to deal with too many obstacles due to the fact that my grandfather was a Jewish and holocaust surviver.
Since October or maybe since I seem to be associated with openly zionist buddie and 911 fan, people were questioning my relation with zionism. They done it by sending me this anonymously and partially giving me a choice to rather address that or not. Because I guess my blog is apolitical and safe place for fandom stuff. My blog and my choices right?
If after my explanation, you don't accept my perspective and my thoughts and (not) respect them, then you are welcome to unfollow me and block me. No hurt feelings. But DO NOT COME AFTER PEOPLE IN THE FANDOM FOR ASSOCIATED WITH ME , FOR REBLOG FROM ME. Because I won't accept this behavior and I will dare to say that this tactic is not helping for the cause of the Palestinian people's rights for liberation. I really think that you can do better than that.
I guess that no matter how polite and compassionate I try to explain myself to you or address my political views without dismiss other people's opinions and perspectives, people will always have something negative to say about me. People will always try to find something wrong about me and therefore will paint me as the worst person in the world, no matter which side. Some would say that I'm naive for still believing in peace. Some would say that I'm a people pleaser and don't really have the balls to say anything that is so certain. Either this or that. Some say that I'm manipulater who tries to lure people to my side aka pro Israel side. Some would mad at me for not saying the exact words they wanted me to say. And some would just twist my words to something I never said. Honestly, I don't care about this anymore because I know who I am, and I know how I treat other people. And I think that if other people from the fandom would be honest with themselves, they know very well what kind of person I am .
To those of you who will still (hopefully) decided to stick with me despite or not the difference in our opinions and perspectives, you are truly good friends and kind people 💖 it's a humongous honor to have you as my friends and mutuals. I don't deserve you and I'm so appreciative for you. I also want to apologize for not trusting you in this because it's really tough days. And I again want to apologize for desiving you with my other name.
#yelenasbuddie#i/p war#my inbox remains open#you can send me anonymously#but if you will send me a hate anon or threats#or send them to others#you will be blocked
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