#and I was already gonna disappoint my therapist bc I didn't do the thing she asked me to do

[liebelesbe]

bus spotted entering town when it's supposed to be leaving it by now, 13 injured 4 dead

[lemememeringue]

tis change of season (oof ow, me bones) so therapy was mostly talk abt disabilities.

[usertoxicyaoi]

First of all I completely disagree with everything you guys have been saying about Sarawat. Nobody is at fault but the issue here is Tine's insecurities. Pam's text was a hello so how could Sarawat have been lying and texting her? Also Tine was the one imaging scenarios in his head while browsing through Pam's ig, something he didn't need to do. Also Sarawat can't force Tine to talk, he asked him several times to tell him what's wrong and he refused to. Wat also stayed up all night which is /1

how he knew that Tine stayed up listening to music but like I said Tine didn't want to talk so what exactly do you guys expect him to do? Even the next day Tine STILL didn't want to talk and it was only till Sarawat abandoned band practice to take care of Tine and asked him again what was wrong which is when Tine told him how he felt about Pam. Wat explained the situation to Tine even pointing out he doesn't see Tine and Pam as similar to each other and his little joke at the end was just to /2

lighten the mood and make Tine feel better, which he did, not to dismiss his feelings. As for the song, it's probably the same as the video Tine thinking it's one thing and it being another. I don't understand how if Sarawat doesn't completely deal with Tine's insecurities, he's his boyfriend not his therapist, and Tine assumes stuff then that means Sarawat is an evil demon who has wronged Tine in the worst way. No one is wrong here people just need to talk. /3

hiii anon!!! wow okay. urm. so.

firstly, i’m sorry. i hold my hands up and i wanna apologise not just to you, but anybody else who i may have offended yesterday by saying how disappointed i was with sarawat in ep 12 and how he felt written really badly for me to the point where it irked me bc it felt like glimpses of novel! wat were peaking thru him in ep 12. but i’ve slept on it, and i’ve calmed down now. but yeah, i am still really sorry for what i said. 

and its fine that you disagree and its absolutely okay for you to do so. you saw wat in a very different way than i did. thus, my interpretation was a total 180 from yours. 

that being said, its ..... a sensitive issue. tine’s insecurities are a sensitive issue. yes, sarawat isn’t his therapist or counsellor. he is his boyfriend. and i feel like, if i were in that position, it would worry me if my s/o kept on hiding things from me, only for me to constantly find yet another ambiguous thing, and when i ask them for an explanation, they panic and freeze and just ... evade. especially if that happens not just once, but again and again. then, do you really blame tine for overthinking things? lets leave his insecurities out for a second, lets say he wasn’t insecure. even then, would you really blame him for being in the wrong if he overthought? 

now here’s where tine has been a bit more quicker to react, in that he eventually, within that same ep, plucks up the courage to ask wat directly. and within that same ep or directly onto the next one, things get resolved and wat explains himself. so they do communicate. 

but this time, its not just a simple issue. its not just a video, or a song. its a person. a first love. a past thats come to the present of which tine had very little idea on. handling that is a very different issue than to handling a video or a song being hidden from you. and what heightens it for him is that wat referred to her as his “first love”. not even a crush, but a “first love”. and pam says to him “she loves him back”. now obviously, we know that wat doesn’t love her. a ��first’ love doesn’t mean the ‘only’ love. but couple that with tine’s already failed dating history, where his s/o has left him everytime, due to which he now feels he isn’t worth it, along with the fact that pam is quite literally a reflection of him in many ways, yet different from him too. what else is tine supposed to feel other than “second best yet again”. 

now, like you said. the issue here is tine’s insecurities. you’re right - it is! bc this whole show is from tine’s perspective, so of course, all the issues and faults relate back to him and his way of perceiving and reading things. he either reads too much into it or doesn’t at all. its what insecurities do - they mess up and warp your perception into 2 very radical and polar opposite ends, one thats too intense and deep and one that is hollow and vacant. 

now, i’m gonna say what i said yesterday. though this is sarawat’s first relationship, from what we know and can see, wat LOOKS and APPEARS to be the more secure one in the relationship from the two, partly bc he has had that year to stew over his feelings for tine, and this was when he didn’t even know if he’d see tine again. and now that he’s with tine, its more or less everything he’s ever wanted, given to him. but tine’s not had that time. all he’s had is failed relationship after failed relationship. but also, just bc sarawat has now, in tine, what he has always wanted, doesn’t mean its plain sailing. sarawat didn’t know tine came with such a huge amount of emotional baggage with him. 

and yes sarawat has tried. he tried again and again yesterday to reach out. and i commend him for it. but now is the real crucial time for sarawat to learn who tine is, and help him unload that emotional baggage - not do it for him, but help him. not as a therapist or counsellor, but as his significant other. 

and in doing that, he can’t make light of the situation. which, ya know, you found it as him tryna cheer tine up, but i didn’t. i found it rude and inappropriate. and thats okay. you have your view, i have mine. what also needed to happen here was, not sarawat saying that “he claims tine and that tine belongs to him”. no. go back to ep 11, where sarawat said to tine “i’d like to be with you for longer than 10 years”. something like that was what tine needed to hear then. something that mentioned stability and longevity, something he hasn’t had before ever in a relationship, not possessiveness. but of course, that’s just me being very nit picky so ... feel free to ignore that.

and the thing is, ya know what. in all of this. tine is gonna beat himself up more than anything and anyone else. he won’t even lash out that badly at sarawat, more so than he will beat his own self up for it. for being “dumb and silly and stupid and not enough and just a shadow and a failure”. he’s done it before, he will do it again. he won’t even feel the need to see sarawat as a demon. he loves him too much for that. and thats also another problem. 

he sees sarawat as this entirely perfect person. i dont wanna say that he puts him on a pedestal, but bc other people do, it doesn’t help in his perception of seeing sarawat as being this too good of a person thats somehow ended up falling in love and being with him. that’s tine lack of self esteem speaking. and thats something they’re both gonna have to talk about. 

these things arent just gonna go away. they’ll lie dormant, then flare up, then lie dormant again. what they can do though, like you mentioned, is talk. not as therapist-patient, but as 2 people, as equals, in a relationship. tine is gonna have to learn to open up and trust wat and change his perception and see that wat is human and that he isn’t perfect and that he is just as much of an equal part to this whole relationship, and wat’s gonna have to learn to not keep things secretive from tine and make tine see that he in fact is human and not perfect and just be more empathetic towards tine’s insecurities and low self esteem.

but thats easier said than done.