#and I can actually cuddle and pet the goat

[deathsmallcaps]

While touring on the San Diego duck vehicles, we actually caught a glimpse of the navy training dolphins and sea lions. According to the guide, the sea lions were much better at being food motivated and trustworthy, but the dolphins were a bit more agile and quick, so that’s why they use both. They find and ‘tell’ the military where underwater mines are and such

I’m generally against the military, and I’m kind of against using animals in such dangerous jobs. But regardless of my feelings, it’s happening. And I’ve been wondering for a while how ethically involved are these animals. Like, are they domesticated? Are dolphins really that smart, enough that they can consent to this sort of thing? I know they need lots of mental stimulation, like border collies but even more. And I figure this is the right post to ask.

(Also for the record I am 99% sure the duck vehicle company respected the animals well, and asked us not to feed them at all. It’s been about 2 years since I went so I may not remember everything but they seemed good to me)

I think it's a common misconception that domesticating animals is somewhat like enslaving them. It really is more of a symbiotic relationship. No wild animal would have willingly put up with early humans if they didn't get something out of it. Wolves wouldn't have stayed with us and become dogs if they weren't getting food and safety out of it. Many large herbivores that are now domesticated could and would have easily trampled their early human captors or broken their enclosures open if they didn't have a reason to stay. Sometimes individual animals still do if we don't give them what they need.

The animals that have stayed with us for thousands of years have evolved to cooperate with us better. Dogs have additional facial muscles around their eyes that wolves lack in order to mimic human facial expressions. Sheep grow their wool perpetually while their wild counterparts don't because a bigger fleece means they're more likely to be allowed to breed and be kept around. Domestic dairy cows produce much more milk than wild bovine species and domestic hens lay more eggs. Do you know how energy costly producing eggs or milk is for an animal? It's pretty intense! They wouldn't be able to do that if we hadn't given them the food and safety from predators and the elements to.

And we really need to show these animals respect and gratitude for what they give us by taking excellent care of them. They gave up a lot to be with us, often including the means to take care of themselves in the wild. That's a huge reason why I'm not against using animal products, but I hate factory farming. They are still living, breathing creatures with needs and feelings. They deserve a comfortable life and, when the time comes, a humane death.

[cherie-doll]

𓆩♡𓆪 Headcanon: Convincing Them To Get A Pet

⊱⊰ Price, Ghost, Soap, Gaz, Roach, Alejandro, Phillip Graves, Keegan, Hesh Walker, Logan Walker, König, Horangi, Nikto

Price

You kept bringing stray cats home

Every time you walk through the door, hands buried in the pockets of your tightly wrapped coat, John turns his head and asks "What've you got in there?"

"I don't know what you're talking about" and a meow can be heard coming from inside your coat

He makes you take it off to find a cat and her kittens snug and warm in the inner pockets

"They were cold..." you say sheepishly when he sighs

Ghost

He has to take care of you and now you want a pet??

Says he has enough on his plate with just you

You’re blowing up his phone sending him videos of animals or shoving the phone in his face

“Simon, Simon! Look at this! We should totally get one.”

“…That’s a spider. Why would you want that?”

Soap

He had also been wanting a pet for some time now, he had an exotic animal in mind until you got chickens

"...Are we going to eat it?"

"Johnny, no."

Now he has to wake up early and feed them every day when the sun rises to when the sun goes down

The chickens have grown on him and he's even named them, gets upset when you or someone jokes about eating them

Gaz

Is totally fine with any pet as long as it’s nothing too out of the ordinary, so you got bunnies

You'll let them roam around the house sometimes and Kyle hates when you do that because they tend to chew things and it's somehow always his things

Imagine Kyle falling asleep in your bed with the pink comforters and the adorable fluffy baby bunnies (yes i'm making a reference to that one tiktok)

Roach

Unfortunately for both of you, you are weak when it comes to animals

You’re both fawning over the cats and dogs in the animal shelter, cuddling with the baby goats at the local farm even if they’re chewing your clothes and head butting you

Together you’ve owned your weird assortment of pets; ducks, goats, spiders, snakes etc.

I headcanon Gary is a nerd when it comes to snakes and bugs

Alejandro

In the moment, you manage to convince him pretty easily, until you actually bring home the dog you wanted

Pretends he doesn’t like petting it or getting near it

Even curses when he has to get up at night to let it out for it to use the bathroom

But ofc within a month he’s totally smitten over your pit bull

Spends money on buying it nice collars and food, taking it out for a drive in his truck frequently

When cooking on the grill he always buys extra meat just for your dog

Phillip Graves

I like to think he has a soft spot for animals and agreed to going along with you when deciding what animal to adopt

What he didn't expect was to be pulling into a ranch and looking at horses

He expected to be looking at dogs or cats or a fish even

Now he's helping you muck out the stall for the beautiful pinto you bought

Helps brush her down and keep its mane and tail smooth to enter it in shows and competitions

Keegan

He knew you'd been wanting a pet for a while now because every time you visited someone who owned a pet you'd asked if you could play or pet them

You probably spent longer bonding with animals than with humans

Decided to surprise you with a talking parrot

Every now and then he'll teach it cute phrases like "I love you", the parrot will sometimes pick up some colorful language from Keegan

Hesh Walker

He caved in and originally thought of gifting you a pretty Siamese cat before thinking he'd like to play a little prank on you

As a joke, he gave you two rats, each with a pink bow on them

David would've started laughing if it weren't for you growing attached to them, eventually he did tell you he intended to buy you a cat

The rats were quite intelligent and learned tricks fast and frequently played games so both you and David decided to keep them and forget about the original plan of getting a cat

Logan Walker

He could never say no to you

However, you had owned a dog before, Logan wasn't fond of cats and you didn't want something like a lizard or a fish that would stay inside a tank all the time

The perfect opportunity came up when you had the chance to adopt a baby cow, a calf who had lost its mother

You both agreed, there was extra unused backyard space

The calf was named "Moonpie"

König

You really wanted a pet, but König couldn't understand why

"We already have a pet"

It was an iguana, which König already owned when you moved in with him

You weren't very fond of it because of an anecdote that occurred the first time you were over at König's place; you had seen a long tail in between the couch cushions and thinking it was a stuffed animal or a toy you pull at it only to see the iguana moving

It still freaks you out to this day when you remember how flaky and weird the scales felt

Horangi

He agreed and suggested he be the one to go pick out a pet from the shelter

You stood at the door when you heard his car ready to meet your new pet only to be met with a plastic container

Upon opening the box you're shocked to see he brought home a snake, he just snickers as he picks it up, holding it as the boa wraps around his arm biceps

"You wanted a pet, didn't you?"

Nikto

You had spent months trying to convince him to get a pet, to which he kept saying no to

"Come on Andre, a dog wouldn't be as bad as a kid"

He had no reaction other than just a grunt, but next time he came home from deployment he set a portable crate down

You rushed excitedly when you heard squeals thinking it was a puppy, after three weeks you notice the brownish fur begin to lighten and spots appearing

"Where did you say you got the dog from?''

"Did I ever say it was a dog?"

Post inspired by this cutie:

Everyone say "Thank you Corazòn"

[itstimetojellyfish]

Fanning the flames of affection (Jiaoqiu x reader)

Angst/Fluff/Smut. This is gonna be a long one so please don’t complain if you lose track of time reading this.

this is my first smut post so yeah.

Btw , you can request a male version of the smut if you’d like .

MDNI

Contains: Oral(Fem!reader receiving) , penetration, basically pretty vanilla , tail stroking , tail cuddling , tail humping .

It’s too fucking spicy .

When you first came to the Xianzhou Yaoqing , you heard of the amazing Jiaoqiu , known for his extraordinary culinary and medical skills . The praises of him were practically as high as the stars above!

So , your first mission was to find his restaurant and beg him for some of his special noodles , seeing that everyone praised the wonderful and magnificent flavors it had and how healthy it was .

You wandered along the streets of the Yaoqing , talking to many of the locals questioning them where the famous Jiaoqiu was so you could eat his wonderful food .

They just chuckled and said he’s a stall vendor and that you should prepare your spice tolerance , you have a pretty good one since you grew up on the Luofu so you have nothing to worry about!

Or so you thought.

You were always a foodie , picky on how you wanted the dishes to be made and how they were supposed to be cooked , this was mainly because your taste buds were particularly sensitive .

One time your mother just handed you grilled fish and you almost cried because of how bland the flavor was compared to the other dishes your mother made for you .

You never considered the fact that she was getting tired of you and was actually leaning towards the option of putting tapeworms in your food…

But anyways !

You walked along the streets and when it became dark you would go to a nearby inn and rest there for the night .

Soon , after a whole 2 weeks of dutifully tracking down the pink-haired foxian , you finally found the stall that he lead and plopped your butt down and ordered some of the famous noodles.

He smiled at you sweetly , but it had an undertone of something dangerous that wasn’t exactly something you feared but was a bit concerning to the point you checked your food for poison and tapeworms.

You looked over them before taking a tentative sip of the broth and then devouring the noodles immediately, you couldn’t help it! But then you felt something was wrong .

Now , you did say that you had a pretty good spice tolerance, but the people failed to mention and describe how fucking spicy the food he created was .

Not even two minutes in the spice started burning your throat like a thousand wasps stinging the tender flesh of your throat and you realized that your lips and tongue were starting to go numb .

You forgot how sensitive your taste buds were after countless mornings of eating bland porridge….

The pink - haired foxian just stared at you with a cunning smile as he watched you wheeze for your life before narrowing his eyes and realizing something was terribly wrong .

He rushed over to the refrigerator and pulled out a chilled bottle of puffer goat milk before running to your side and prying your jaw open , noticing the tears streaming down your cheeks .

He coaxed your throat to relax by petting your throat where the windpipe would be and then poured the thick , sweet creamy milk down your throat.

He capped the bottle before bending over the counter and brought out a bag of ice before taking the scooper and placing a few ice cubes on your tongue and rubbing your back.

After a few minutes , your coughing fit eased and you opened your eyes a crack to see the Foxian gently pet your cheek before asking ,” Are you alright?”

You took a deep breath before telling him ,” Yeah… I’m okay now, if you’re wondering why I had such a strong reaction that was because I have some pretty sensitive taste buds.. but your food is really good!”

He eyes you up and down , his tail swaying side to side and then gently laying itself on your thigh .” That’s good to hear , thank you”

You looked at his fluffy pink tail resting itself on your leg before looking back up and the male towering over you and smiling .” You’re welcome!”

While you did find the tail on your thigh a little bit affectionate, you just thought of it as some resting time for it since it always has to rely on the foxian’s spine . You wonder whether or not it painful for their spinal cord.

You didn’t know that this was a sign of interest in you .

Then something stared to cramp in your stomach…. Did you not get rid of all the tapeworms yet?…

You quickly placed a hand in your stomach as you closed your eyes, resisting the urge to cling onto Jiaoqiu’s fluffy tail for dear life as your stomach started cramping really bad.

In the mist of pain , you could vaguely feel someone’s arms gently wrap around your shoulders and underneath your knees and lift you up into the air .

Soon you were being carried around the ship in Jiaoqiu’s arms as he rushed to his house for some herbs to treat your condition .

Soon , soft buttery linens caressed your form as you felt a warm sturdy hand rub your stomach gently as a cold sharp object cut through your flesh and a pair of tweezers gently picks through your fragile flesh and takes out things one by one.

Soon , something pierces your skin again as it sews your flesh closed again and a large warm hand rubs your stomach and pets your head as you soon begin to fall asleep.

———————🪼✨

The warm sunlight pierces your eyes as you groggily get up and rub your face as you attempt to recall last night.

As you sit up in bed , a warm hand gently pets your naked back and rubs your spine gently as you feel something soft and warm curl around your waist and rub against the flesh .

You tense up before looking down and seeing a pale pink tail rubbing against you , you immediately turn pink as you whip your head around and see the Foxian drape a soft white robe around you while giving you that signature smile.

He fully clothed behind you and you look down noticing the stitches in your stomach , his tail avoiding the spot .

You’re stunned speechless as he picks up a spoon from the table next to you and dips it into some sort of pale white pudding and then holding the spoon to your mouth .

“Open up ,” Jiaoqiu says as he gently parts your lips with the spoon , waiting for you to open your jaw and allow the somehow healthy gelatinous dessert into your mouth.

You chew for a bit , relishing the cool sensation of the pudding in your tongue as his eyes soften and his hands place the spoon down after you’re done eating .

He gives you some of his shirts , quite large actually , and then heads off to the living room proclaiming,” Take it easy for today , if you need me just yell , you wouldn’t want your stitches coming loose would you?”

You look down as he leaves and then realize, he’s the one who helped you when your cramps got bad.

Soon you end up somehow changing into the clothes he gave you and shakily walk your way into the living room where he’s lounging at looking at a recipe book.

He smiles at you and invites you over , and so , this is the start of your domestic life together for the next two weeks .

~~~~~~~~~~����

It’s been quite awhile since you’ve been living together , he’s helped you a lot since your flesh has yet to heal and adjust, while he has taken out the stitches , your nerves still need to mend together .

You can’t move much because of that so when you need something , Jiaoqiu either gets the item for you , or he carries you .

During this time , you’ve gotten to know each other better , like how high his spice tolerance is , and he’s learned about your preferences.

Also , you’ve noticed he has favored you quite often these past few weeks .

You don’t like this pepper? Never seen in his kitchen again .

The mint is too much for you ? Thrown out the window immediately.

Too spicy? Immediately lowered while other customers still complain .

There’s also another reason, foxian ears and tails are very sensitive , and they don’t just let anyone touch it , but bring the ill-informed person you are , you ask to pet them .

He stares at you before chuckling and tilts his head towards you and sways his tail , allowing you to touch them to your heart’s content.

Now , you only realized this when you went to the library for some new recipe books ,Your wound has gotten better so Jiaoqiu allowed you to go out , when you were searching the shelves you stumbled upon an open book about Foxian customs .

Next thing you know you rush out of the library with two recipe books underneath your arm and as red as a tomato .

When you get home you quickly plop the books on the kitchen counter for Jiaoqiu to read after he’s done cooking for others .

After a few hours he’s back from work and has started to cook some stir fry for you , the spices overflowing the room with their scent .

You aren’t gonna lie , the man is extremely handsome and you wouldn’t mind if he had his way with you , but you aren’t sure if he felt the same way .

He’s been quite the lovely guy and he’s been very hospitable, so you suppose it wouldn’t hurt to give in and indulge in your fantasies…

Right?

You were brought out of your thoughts when the man you’ve been thinking of walked over to you and gently lifted your chin ,” A credit for your thoughts? I haven’t gotten the name of the woman who I’ll be working with “

You stare at him before asking ,” Wait… working with? “

As soon as those words came out of his mouth, you flushed red to the point you would’ve looked like an actual tomato . You didn’t think you could’ve gotten any redder .

You didn’t know he was courting you all this time!

Before you know it he has you pinned to a wall and is caressing your cheek ,” Oh Y/N …. My sweet darling … have you finally noticed my affections for you ?”

You look away before nodding slightly , making a wide smirk appear on his face , a chuckle escaping his lips .

“ It’s about time .” A soft tail curled loosely around your ankle and he gently tucked a piece of your hair behind your ear.

You stare at him for a few seconds before pressing your lips together and saying ,” Oh fuck it….”

He smiles at you before tugging at the hem of the shirt he let you borrow and asking ,” So you’re consenting to this?”

You nod your head before tipping his head towards you and pressing your lips to his frantically , wishing for more even though you don’t know how to get it .

You’re a bit inexperienced so you’re hoping he knows what to do …. However you do know the basics of what happens .

He gently swipes his tongue along the seam of your lips as he kisses you back with just as much force you put in , asking for your permission.

You gladly part your lips allowing him entry as he immediately thrusts his tongue into you mouth and starts to explore your mouth , caressing your tongue with his .

Mean while , his hands are busying unbuttoning your shirt while yours are clinging onto his shoulders for dear life while he ravishes your mouth .

A burning warmth is pooling in your stomach as he finally undoes the last button and starts to fondle your waist , one hand creeping up to your bra to unclasp it while the other continues to grasp at your flesh .

He pulls away from your mouth and narrows his eyes as he struggles to unclasp your bra , pouting slightly .

You giggle before reaching back and help him take your bra off , handing it to him after it’s been unclasped .

He looks at the lacy white material before throwing it to some unknown corner and lifting you up and starts walking towards the bedroom kissing you fervently while you tangle your fingers into his soft pink hair .

He gently puts you down into the bed and sits down with you , immediately fondling your breasts and pinching your cute nipples until they turn stiff , making you moan .

As he continues that his mouth is sucking your supple skin and he’s straddling your thigh and grinding his crotch against it , making you soak your panties at the scene in front of you .

He trails a line of kisses down to your midsection as his hand creeps lower and pulls down your shorts slightly to fondle your womanhood , making you squeal .

“ Hey!…” You gently pushed his hand away before curling in and flopping onto the bed .

Jiaoqiu stares at you before smiling and asks ,” Too fast my darling girl?“

You blush before nodding , before you can say anything , he gently brushes his pink tail against the fabric of your panties and the tip of it teasingly pulls on the fabric before resting against it .

He leans forward and then kisses you passionately before telling you ,” I can take it slow if you’d like…”

Before you can respond he rubs his tail against you and before you know it , your straddling his tail and humping against it as both of you moan out loud.

Your hands are tangled in the soft fur of his tail as he marks your collarbone and neck all over , your slick leaking through your panties and soaking his tail a bit.

You whine as he starts fondling your chest and whimper out ,” Jiaoqiu…. I’m close…”

He chuckles before kissing the nape of your neck and says ,” Don’t worry…. Let go , I’ll get my reward later …”

As soon as he said that , the glass broke as you came , drenching the middle of his tail with translucent liquid, slicking it up while you kept grinding against it .

After your pleasure high, you slump onto him and take deep breaths as his hand pets your back.

While you’re in a daze, you don’t realize that Jiaoqiu has lowered himself to your crotch and has pulled off your panties , you only do realize when you feel cool air against your wet folds .

You push your upper body up immediately only to find the one bedding you face to face with your fold looking like he’s ready to devour them.

“ Hey… what are you doing?…” You reach for his head but before you can pull him off , he blows warm air on your cunt and his tongue peeks out of his mouth and licks a warm, wet stripe against it while pushing your legs apart so he can get better access .

Soon you’re writhing around as Jiaoqiu thrusts his tongue into your sweet ,tight ,and warm hole as you complain ,” Jiaoqiu! It’s dirty down there! Don’t lick it- Oh!!”

Your hands tangle in his hair as you moan out loud , brushing against his long ears , making him moan against your cunt sending pleasurable vibrations against your cunt.

Your feet kick out as he starts sucking on your clit , you don’t realize he’s picked through the drawers to find some lube until you feel a cool , wet finger gently part your folds and find your small little hole and gently prod at it .

You flinch a bit and he asks , “ Is this okay with you?” His amber eyes pierce through your skin , as you press your lips together .

You nod your head and he gives you a light hum before continuing to suck on your clot and prods at your hole .” This might feel a little weird but it’s going to feel good okay?”

“ Okay…” You lied down as he gently inserted his finger in , making your fingers in his hair grip tighter .

He smiles at you before kissing your clit and holding it in his mouth as he wriggles his finger around in you , stretching you out .

As soon as you loosen up a bit and relax around his finger , he presses another finger in and sucks on your clit hard in order to distract you from the pain .

You squeal and flinch as he does that and writhe around when he continues to pump his fingers in and out of you , pressing against your insides.

Soon enough you’re taking four of his fingers , and he starts to push around to find that one spot that would make you see stars .

It didn’t take long before you start fidgeting around , moaning out constantly, and then his fingers feel a rough patch and you yell out .

He smirked and then took out his fingers , pulled down his boxers , revealing his length , which was a pretty considerable size…

He lubed it up , making him hiss a bit , and placed the head of it against your cunt, the precum on it smearing .

You held your breath as he slowly breached your hole and your warm , wet insides spasms around the length penetrating your most delicate parts.He notices this and brings his tail up to your hands and gently tangles his fur into your hands while his have a firm grip on your waist

Once Jiaoqiu felt you relax , he asked you ,” Are you ready?” In an affectionate yet strained tone.Is was very clear that he was trying to hold back from rutting into you and making you a brainless mess.

You sigh before clinging onto his tail and telling him ,” Yeah… I’m ready.”

He smiles at you softly before pulling out a bit , and then thrusting in gently, making you moan out.

His smile turns into a smirk as he pulls out a few inches, and then thrusts in a little bit harder , making your walls spasm and tighten which made his grip on your hips tighter .

You looked up to see his pretty face have sweat beading on the side of it and his amber eyes clouded with determination as he continue to gently thrust in and out , patiently waiting for you to say that he could go faster .

After you get used to the intrusion, you take a deep breath and tell him ,” Alright…. You can go faster.”

His head immediately looks up and stares at you before raising an eyebrow and asking you ,” Are you sure?”

You nod , and some enough he’s pounding into you mercilessly as you writhe around , moaning and whimpering .

You can feel the burning sensation in your stomach get hotter and hotter until it finally snaps and you attempt to warn your partner ,” Jiaoqiu!.. I’m-… Gonna cu-!”

However you only manage to get out most of the sentence before your cum seeps out of your cunt even with the object plugging it up .

The foxian feels your wall tighten and relax sporadically which leads him to thrust into your warm welcoming heat and fuck you through your orgasm .

Soon enough , he’s pulling out and hot white ropes of semen latch onto your skin , after he gets down from his pleasure high , he collapses onto you , grabs the edge of the blanket with one hand , and pulls it over you two as his other hand latches onto your waist .

You fall asleep in his arms when he gently pets you head and tangles his hands into you hair , kissing your fore head and whispering sweet nothings.

You don’t hear what exactly he says though .

You didn’t react when he said ,

“ You’re such a lovely bunny…”

[peqchys]

❥ obey me demon form headcanons!!

these are a month or so old but i realized i never posted them so here we go!! [headcanons under cut!!]

lucifer!! ⁃ for the love of god he’s not goat boy he’s peacock boy ⁃ do i think he would let mc keep a pretty feather or two? yes. ⁃ i think he would spread his feathers when he’s super pissed ⁃ on a similar note, i think the boys would have some animalistic instincts related to their demon forms. so yes, lucifer WOULD try to use his pretty pretty feathers to attract mc [it works, somehow] ⁃ i don’t think he could FLY, per se, but he could probably lift himself off the ground a bit

mammon!! ⁃ a weird mix between bat and bird?? ⁃ he preens for sure!!! why? because i think it’s cute. ⁃ ^ he tries to “preen” mc also, if they’ll let him [just him playing with or brushing out their hair] ⁃ he has small claws/talons even out of his demon form ⁃ the whole bird demon thing just makes him like shiny things even more than he already does ⁃ ^ you may offer the mammon coins and jewelry to win his heart

levi!! ⁃ my favorite sea-monster-snake boy!! ⁃ LOVES water. likes to go swimming and showers + takes baths super frequently just to be in water [yes, the gamer boy showers] ⁃ sometimes hisses like a snake if he’s frustrated ⁃ has a super long tongue and can unhinge his jaw [because i’m a weirdo and i think it’s cool] ⁃ will wrap his tail around mc as a sign of affection ⁃ has sharp, shark-like teeth ⁃ curls up with his tail around himself like a snake!! ⁃ while he isn’t ahletic normally, he’s very good at swimming and super fast when he’s in water!!

satan!! ⁃ unicorn cat boy?? again a weird mix ⁃ will genuinely kick people like a horse if they piss him off or startle him. i’m not kidding ⁃ one of the RAD newpapers did say that satan’s birthmark was on his back, so i like to think that he has fur of some kind that we can’t see ⁃ his tail follows cat tail language!! so for example he wags his tail when he’s mad and curls it when he’s happy to see someone [probably mc] ⁃ will let mc pet his tail as long as they’re very careful ⁃ he can purr i will not take criticism on this

asmo!! ⁃ scorpion boy!! also has bat traits like mammon!! ⁃ CAN sting someone in self defense. ⁃ has more bat traits/behavior than mammon ⁃ ^ vampire bat to be specific!! yes, he can and will suck blood. ⁃ vampire bats are very cuddly with each other, which i think makes sense for asmo!! ⁃ ^ they also groom each other, so i think asmo would do the same with mc [regularly checking in with them and helping to fix their hair and/or makeup]

beel!! ⁃ my silly silly bug boy ⁃ y’know how flies rub their little hands together before they eat? yeah, beel does that too and he doesn’t even realize it. ⁃ in my take of his demon form, he has multiple sets of arms and eyes ⁃ flies are attracted to body heat, and so is beel. he’ll follow mc around the HOL and just hover around wherever they choose to settle down

belphie!! ⁃ funny little cow boy!!! ⁃ cows will follow around humans that they like, and belphie does the same thing!! even if he’s sleepy, he’ll follow mc around until they sit down and then he lets himself nap ⁃ ^ adding this together with the beel thing, the twins are basically completely attached to mc. you could go into any given room in the HOL and just see the three of them cuddled up in a pile. ⁃ ^ speaking of cuddling, cows like to be hugged and cuddled, and you can bet belphie does too!! he tries to fall asleep the same room as mc so that maybe he’ll get some cuddles. sometimes he’ll even force himself into their lap to ensure that he gets their attention. ⁃ i think that belphie wags his tail when happy or comfortable. i know that cows don’t actually do that but let me have this lol

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

I have a light one that’s kind of dumb.

🐶🐱

AITA for wanting a dog even though my sister/housemate does not?

To start, nobody is allergic to dogs or has a fear of them, she just doesn’t want it.

(if ages and gender are important, we’re both f in our early 20s)

I grew up on a farm with lots of animals. There were always cows, I had goats, there were chickens, ducks, barn cats and of course, 1-3 livestock guard dogs at a time.

When I was 16, I had a senior spaniel who had to be put down due to heart problems. Ever since I have been asking if I can have another dog but my parents have said no.

Around a year ago now I sold my goats and moved out of my parents house into an apartment. The apartment didn’t allow any pet bigger than my little gecko.

Then, about January, my older sister started messaging me with images of houses on a realtor site. So we looked at houses. I agreed to buy a house with her 1) so she could move out of our parents house and 2) because being by myself in the apartment with no real friends wasn’t really that good for my mental health.

To her credit, she did get a kitten from our farm and let me keep it, although I didn’t really want a house cat. The main reason I wanted a dog was for the amount of exercise it would need, and I would have to take it for long walks. Not to mention litter boxes aren’t my favourite thing to deal with. Still, I am glad I have a little animal to cuddle.

Additionally, most of the times when I bring up wanting a dog or getting a dog, it’s either in a jokey matter or it’ll be in contrast to something (for example there was a shady guy hanging around our street the other night and we don’t have an actual alarm for our house, so I went “yknow if we had a yappy little chihuahua it would be an alarm enough” or something like that) to which she will reply something short and growly along the lines of “you’re never getting a dog in my house”

Her reasons she gives for not wanting a dog? Number one, it’s “her” house. (It’s in both of our names, I paid half the down deposit and I pay half the mortgage and bills, and I pay for the Wifi. I’m not paying her rent, we both own it) Number 2, her friend is allergic to horses. (A friend that never comes over to our house anyway, and I understand fur allergies are complicated but it’s a dog. We aren’t anywhere NEAR horses! We live in town!) (this one is also BS because sister wants to buy a farm and have Clydesdale horses) Number 3, it sheds. We have a cat. The cat sheds more than the breeds of dogs that I really like or want. One of my favourites are the Xolo dog. Which has no hair. At all. Number 4, the cat is scared of dogs. (She isn’t. She’s never seen one in her life. I can get her used to having a dog around easily, even if she starts afraid. I’ve done it before when our parents have gotten new dogs around new cats.)

I’m not going to go behind her back and bring home a dog (even though there have been opportunities to get a free puppy multiple time) but I’m not going to stop wanting to have a dog or wanting to get one or talking about what dogs I like.

Our grandparents are moving to town and selling their farm next year, which sister wants to buy with me. I told her I’d like to move out of town into a farm, but only if she let me get either a dog or a donkey to protect our property against coyotes. (Especially considering we both want chickens if we get a farm)

She got really pissy at me about that, and stormed off. AITA here? I think she’s being a little unreasonable. I’m not a bad pet owner at all, I work with my animals as much as possible. I had my billy goat following me around the farm without a lead before I sold the goats, for pineapple’s sakes!

What are these acronyms?

[simvanie]

Luxor Amata for Scarlett's love is embarrassing BC

Guess who is back (in an alternate timeline)? I totally forgot about the existence of bachelor challenges when I was playing with Luxor for the lust generation of my legacy, until he was old and already fully committed to his wife. I think doing a bachelor challenge with Luxor would have been really fun, but doing one myself with him now, even in an alternate timeline, wouldn't make sense for me since Luxor has already established his story and lore in my sims universe. So, when I saw @theosconfessions post for Scarlett's Love is Embarrassing BC I got this idea where Luxor can still participate in a BC in some way and let others have fun with him. I thought, what if I make an updated version of Luxor set in an alternate timeline where he hasn't met the love of his life yet and so it's entirely possible that he ends up with Scarlett? So, I gave Luxor a makeover and pitched this idea to Stacey (theosconfessions) and luckily she liked it!

Info about Luxor under the cut:

"Blondes have more fun, right?" That is what Luxor heard some of his co-stars say on the set of the upcoming series where he plays a role in. When he asked what they were talking about, they showed him Scarlett's bachelorette challenge call. Luxor's heart skipped a beat and suddenly it felt like his brain wasn't getting enough oxygen anymore. For a while now, Luxor really wants to find someone to grow old with and thinks that Scarlett might be the one. Luxor has had his fair share of official (and unofficial) relationships in the past and it's safe to say that this heartthrob already has a lot of experience in the dating field. One might attribute his need for love and affection to his childhood, in which his single mother, who tried to keep her head above water as a criminal, was often angry at him and didn't give him much attention until he was a little older. But don't get me wrong, Luxor is 100% capable of being fully committed when he finds the right person. He is charismatic, has a good heart and doesn't actually want to cause anyone heartbreak. Although his noncommittal trait caused him sometimes to suddenly jump from one relationship into the other or have multiple at once (and this 'multiple at once' can also be applied to a couple of in the bedroom activities he has had), he feels that it is finally time to settle down and find someone to build a future with. Luxor is currently a B-lister celebrity with a love for stand-up comedy and playing the guitar. He is romantically more interested in women but open to explore romantically, and has had woohoo experience with both men and women. His PR agency told him that it would be better for his public celebrity image to keep that last one under wraps for now. The life in the spotlight can sometimes be a bit hectic, and Luxor hopes that he can find in Scarlett someone to come home to, cuddle on the couch with, tell his new jokes to, go on dates with, play guitar for, have romantic dinners with, go on advetures with, visit the petting zoo with (he absolutely loves the little goats), make memories with, and to show him if it's true when they say that blondes have more fun (whatever fun for them may mean *wink wink*). And what better place to meet Scarlett than one of Luxor's favorite vacation locations, Tartosa!

Pronouns: He/him

Age: He's already nearing the end of his young adult years, but Luxor never minded an age gap in relationships and hopes Scarlett feels the same about it

Sexuality: Bisexual (currently closeted for the public image, but close friends and family know)

Traits: Noncommittal, outgoing, music lover (Luxor originally had the romantic trait here, but it's changed to music lover to make it more fair regarding the other contestants)

Career: Actor

Hometown: Del Sol Valley

I hope you like him! Can't wait to see how the drama, ✨the spice✨, and everything else unfolds in Scarlett's bachelorette challenge.

[jacksdinonuggets]

~More Pain~

Summary: Vaggie’s back pain flares up again during work and regresses to help.

As Vaggie unloaded the last of the boxes off of the Carmine Delivery truck, throbbing erupted from her shoulder blades and middle back. She almost dropped the box she was carrying but managed to keep it from falling. Once it was placed in a good position, she stretched her back out, hoping that it would help. Unfortunately, it didn’t do much.

She needed to lie down. Usually, resting on her side, stomach or back, helped. After signing a few papers for the reinforced weapons and angelic building material, she stumbled over to the couch. The pain was getting so bad that she could barely walk. She flopped onto the hard, uncomfortable coup and groaned. The bad cushion wasn’t very good but lying down did help a bit. Afterall, she was on her feet almost all day, she needed to rest.

However, this flare up was one of her worse ones. The couch didn’t help much and her back still hurt. Then, out of nowhere, it felt like her eye was being stabbed again, even though she only had a socket.

“Aargh!” She yelped and covered her eye.

“Vaggie? You good there?” Lucifer walked in the room and heard her pained voice yell. It worried him since he’s barely seen her in pain.

Instead of answering, she whimpered. It sounded more of a groan though. She was in too much pain to speak.

Lucifer walked over to the couch she was laying on and sat there. “You getting phantom pains?” he asked. She nodded.

“They shouldn’t have taken your eye and wings, sweetie. You didn’t deserve that,” he rubbed a soothing hand along her back, trying to massage it a little. Surprisingly, it actually managed to help. But it only lessened the agony a little bit.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” He asked. She finally had enough strength to speak.

“I- I’d like to regress… can- can you grab Charlie for me?” 

“Of course, sweetie, I’ll be right back with her,” He promised before getting up to go find her.

While he was gone, Vaggie allowed herself to slip into her smolspace and curled up.

When Lucifer returned with Charlie, they saw her softly whimpering and a few tears down her cheeks. Charlie immediately rushed over. She had Vaggie’s bag in her hand and took out her stuffed goat and cat. The cat had a cute pirate costume on with an eyepatch. 

“Hey, my dad told me that you’re having flare ups again,” she handed Vaggie the two plushies, which she squeezed tightly. It was scary, and she needed the extra comfort.

Charlie lifted the girl up and put her in her lap, petting her hair and giving her forehead kisses. Kisses always made things better. 

Charlie cuddled with Vaggie as they watched a movie on the couch. Whenever Charlie needed to get up to go grab something, Vaggie would whine and pout, almost screeching for Charlie to return. So they came up with a system that if Vaggie needed a bottle refill, a snack, some of her toys, or anything else, they would get Lucifer to get it for her. He was more than happy to help. How could he say no? 

Luckily, the movie and regressing helped distract her from the pain. She forgot she even had her wings ripped off. Overall, pain was a bitch, but when you have a good coping mechanism, it won’t be so bad.

[blouisparadise]

Upon request, today we have a rec list of fics where Louis, Harry, or both of them have pets. This is a great group of fics, so please be sure to check them all out and show the authors some love! If you enjoy our rec lists, please also like and reblog this post to help spread the word. Happy reading!

1) Maple | Mature | 5,255 words

Prompt 30: Louis is crazy about animals, so Harry is determined to get him all the pets he wants even if they are unconventional, like a baby goat. Louis is over the moon when they get to adopt a goat family, but there’s one little problem, and that is the goat not liking Harry…or even letting him get close to Louis. At first it’s all endearing fun and games, but when it starts affecting their sex life and Harry’s dick feeling neglected, he’s determined to try win over the goat so he let him be with Louis. It’s easier said than done - who knew goats could screech that loudly? (Tip: google goat screaming to get an idea how loud.) ***Change to a cow, I hope that is okay.

2) At The End Of My Rope | Mature | 5,608 words

"Baby?" Harry mumbles, voice laced with sleep and a shiver goes through Louis at hearing the term. He hasn't called him that in so long, in that voice and, clearly, even Louis' body fucking misses it. "Did you cheat on me?" Louis finds himself asking. If he's being honest it's more so he can see Harry's reaction, than a genuine question, but what has he got to lose? Sure enough, Harry's face changes from sleepy to the most incredulous look Louis' ever seen on him. He actually looks terrified, all wide eyes, mouth gaping like he can't believe Louis would even assume that and Louis would laugh at it, but he's so done with the way Harry's been acting, he just wants to know what the hell's going on.

3) If This Room Was Burning | Explicit | 8,629 words

Where Louis' cat gets stuck on the roof and Harry is the firefighter who ends up saving her.

4) I Built This Bed For Two (I Built This Bed For Me and You) | Explicit | 8,942 words

Harry and Louis broke up after uni and haven't seen each other since—until they're roped into doing a Buzzfeed video together. Featuring awkward cuddling and a reunion that just needed a kick in the arse, gleefully provided by Niall.

5) Glistening Under The Sun (You’re My Honey Soaked Love) | Mature | 8,996 words | Sequel

“Oh Petal,” he picks her up nuzzling the top of her head with his cheek as she nibbles on the lavender, “How lucky are we? I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy, the only thing we have to be sad about is that soon I won’t be able to hold you like this,”

6) Candle Wax & Polaroids On The Hardwood Floor | Explicit | 13,082 words

Prompt 463: Clumsy modern witch Louis AU where he accidentally gives his roommate Harry a love potion and he has a crisis because he thinks he will get in trouble with the law for technically poisoning someone and Harry’s heart eyes aren’t helping.

7) A Vivid And Wistful Melody | Explicit | 13,137 words

"Slowly, he takes his violin out of its case, listens for a few more minutes to Louis’ flute, before joining him as best as he could. The flute stops for a few seconds, and Harry imagines Louis blinking cutely, taken aback, before huffing with a smile, and starting to play again, on a suddenly far happier tune. Harry closes his eyes as he twirls around the living room, violin in hand and music filling the air. He pictures Louis doing the same in his own flat while being careful as to not step on his cat. Somehow, even with heavy eyes and tired limbs, this is the happiest Harry has ever felt in years."

8) Absolutely Smitten | Mature | 20,120 words

Louis is walking his dog. Harry is walking his cat. Leashes get tangled, and feelings too.

9) I Didn't Fall For You (You Fucking Tripped Me) | Explicit | 20,681 words

These days Louis tends to steer clear of dating alphas. He’s dated too many knotheads in his time, and he’s ready to just focus on school and his friends and his pet monitor lizard, of course. Too bad the alpha next door won’t take a hint and stop using the worst pick up lines of all time on him. He’s really got to stop laughing with him--and talking to him and walking to class with him and letting him bring him coffee and tea and gifts for his lizard and watching Netflix together and...

10) Nocturnal Creatures Are Not So Prudent | Mature | 24,558 words

Louis is a white witch with a little black cat named Hemlock and a best human friend Liam (they're a lot like Samantha Stephens and Louise Tate). When he's dragged out to a new club Liam's heard about from a friend and classmate, Louis comes face to face with that which witches do not touch: a charming vampire by the name of Harry.

11) Weightless | Explicit | 25,332 words

Harry is the best dragon racer the world has ever seen and Louis is an almost-vet who feels like he is carrying the weight of the world.

12) A Common Place Affliction | Explicit | 36,508 words

“You should go home,” Louis muses, and Harry can feel the omega crouch down to become eye level with Harry, poking his cheek with a dainty finger. Harry lifts his arm, taking a peek at Louis’ face. Louis looks tired, he notes, but not exhausted, and there’s an eyelash stuck to his cheek. Harry doesn’t hesitate to lazily reach out and thumb over his cheek. “Can’t,” Harry croaks, blindly twisting his hand around to grab at Louis’ offending finger and just holding it. “C’mere. Take a nap with me,” he asks after a beat, opening an eye to look at Louis. Louis raises an eyebrow. “M’not going to nap with you in the middle of the ER, H.” Sighing, Harry squeezes the young nurse’s finger. “Nobody cares.” He knows they do; they’ll annoy nurses and probably worry patients when they catch sight of a nurse and surgeon sleeping on the job. Let alone in the middle of the emergency ward hallway. Harry can hear the complaints now: ‘these are the people we’re supposed to trust with our lives?’

13) You Wish I Was Yours And I Hope That You're Mine | Explicit | 36,992 words

The one where Harry's a bit strange and Louis doesn't give up easily. Of course, they fall in love.

14) Give Me Love | Explicit | 41,041 words

Louis doesn't feel like a good omega, Harry doesn't remember how to be an alpha, and they figure it out together.

15) This Glass House | Mature | 43,072 words

While deployed, Alpha Harry gets injured by an IED explosion, leaving him to deal with severe injuries in its devastating aftermath. During his road to acceptance and recovery he learns with the help of Louis and their children just how important family can be for the mind, body, and soul.

16) Breakable Heaven | Mature | 44,594 words

“What do you think?” Louis gets captured by Harry’s green eyes, unable to look away or even take a breath. “I think you’re the most magnificent creature I’ve ever met.” “You must not have met many creatures then.” Harry’s eyes glance downward to Louis’ lips and his tongue darts out to wet his own. “None like you.”

17) Yesterday Came Suddenly | Explicit | 48,504 words

They don’t talk about it. The way Harry deflects any and all questions about his past and Louis pretends he isn’t confused or hurt by it. The way Harry keeps a distance between them and Louis acts like he can’t see it creating a wall between them. The way Harry doesn’t always answer honestly and Louis goes along with it as if he can’t tell. They don’t talk about it. Harry knows Louis feels like he doesn’t know him well enough, and it pains him. It pains him every time Louis gets that look on his face that’s a mixture of disappointment, frustration, and confusion. And sometimes, self-blame. It pains him because Louis is��wrong. Because even though there is a lot Louis doesn’t know about him, there is so much that he does. He knows what Harry is like at his most vulnerable: curled up on this bed with him in the dark where it’s safest. He knows Harry in a way no one else does.

18) So Much We Didn’t Say | Mature | 53,584 words

Harry’s near fatal accident exposed the cracks in his and Louis’ eleven year marriage. A serious error in judgement by Louis shattered it completely.

19) Secret's Safe With Me | Explicit | 59,208 words

When bad turbulence and three glasses of wine have Louis spilling all of his secrets to the man sitting next to him on the plane, it's embarrassing, sure, but it's also easy enough to shrug off and block out of his memory forever. Or at least, it was until Louis went into work on Monday morning and realized that the man from the plane is the new CEO of his company.

20) Tug-Of-War | Explicit | 63,000 words

Louis' husband dies suddenly and he is left with nothing. Well, not really nothing. He has Harry. And a St. Bernard puppy named Link, whom his late husband left behind for him. Louis takes care of Link and Harry takes care of Louis. Everything is okay until suddenly, it isn't.

21) Sweet Creature | Explicit | 78,282 words

Prompt: "You're having a nightmare and I feel bad because you're trembling and crying so I crawl into bed with you and hold you so you feel safe, but in the morning you wake up with my arms around you and you're really confused and embarrassed."

22) Elysian | Mature | 81,886 words

Harry is running out of time to fall in love, but with Louis, it seems as if there’s all the time in the world.

23) Beautiful War | Mature | 103,379 words

Five years ago, Louis was nearly the next victim in a string of murders plaguing Portland, Oregon. He managed to escape and the Angel Killer was apprehended and sent to prison. Now, Louis' a best-selling author that assists state police with minor cases. He still suffers from the events of the days he'd been held hostage, but he's found ways to cope. That is, until the killings start up again. A body was found in the woods. A body that bared the same signature the media had dubbed: The Angel of Death. Special Agent Harry Styles leads the case, and he doesn't buy into the clairvoyant bullshit that Louis spewed to save face five years ago. He's certain that Louis Tomlinson was involved. Until they meet, and they're both left questioning everything they'd thought to be true.

24) Only You Can Be My Alpha | Explicit | 212,387 words

In a world where one was either an Alpha or an Omega wolf, Louis found himself in a body that could be neither. Born an Omega without the expected characteristics of one, he felt broken, choosing to live as Alpha a lifestyle as he could. Harboring a serious lack of respect for Alphas and their authority complexes, Louis managed to get himself banished from his home, forced to wander the unforgiving woods for years, facing the elements and fighting enemy rogues each time they arose. Unbeknownst to Louis, in a tribe to the southwest of his home, there lived a dysfunctional Alpha, the orphaned pack leader Harry, who had never felt satisfied enough with anyone to settle down and continue his royal line. Living their lives apart thus far, the both of them assumed that they might be alone forever, making the best of things despite this even though it hurt. Chance, luck, or maybe fate brings Louis to this tribe when he’d least expected to receive kindness and shelter from a stranger, and when he arrives, something in his soul pulls him to Harry like a raging river current. The two don’t get off to a good start, but everyone around them can sense the chemistry—and in time they do too.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

[delopsia]

del 💐 do the trio have any animals? like, cows, chickens, sheep, goats? or do they maybe just have horses, dogs, and cats? but! do robby and reader ever catch rhett napping with any of the animals that they have inside or outside?

*whispers* i don’t have a tiktok but i have seen an amount of farm videos uploaded elsewhere of people napping with cows, or the one of the tiny baby lamb getting scritches and knocking its hoof against the person when they stop? but also big rhett curled up with big dogs—i actually don’t know how big shepherding dogs are (if they have cows), or if you can nap with a horse? but cat naps in the sun with a cat? omg 🌷 but you tell me, darling! what’s going on in that household?!

I almost hit "Answer Privately" when I was drafting this and nearly had a heart attack.

omg wait why have I never really considered this 😭 I have so many thoughts. (Sidebar, I'm writing this assuming nobody has any allergies. If you're allergic to a particular animal, just...skip over that portion and pretend it never happened <3)

There's never really...been a plan for pets; they've sort of just happened? Aside from the chickens that Bob gets after he leaves the Navy (three Buff Orpingtons and two silkies. I elaborate more on this in Rhett's A Borderline Disney Princess), nobody has actually sat down and said, "Hey, I want to get this particular animal for this reason." Instead, the animals sort of...find them instead.

The first Winter in the new house, two days before Christmas, Rhett inexplicably didn't come home when he was supposed to. The Reader and Bob had called and texted him, but the most they'd gotten was a rushed promise of "I'll be home soon." He's usually home come dinner time, but by the time Bob and Reader had ate, showered and watched a pre-bedtime movie, their cowboy was nowhere to be seen.

So when a shivering Rhett and his buddy Archie came bursting through the door, snow clinging to their hair and the bottom of Archie's beard, the Readrer and Bob didn't know what to think. And Rhett was so focused on what resided in the box to see the way Bob's face lit up when a choir of tiny, tiny meows echoed through the kitchen.

Kittens. Dumped out on the ranch, Rhett and Archie have been working. Feral, spicy little things. Big enough to climb a tree and evade two cowboys but not old enough to survive without their momma. There are five of them: two white, a one-eyed calico, one solid black, and an orange. And every single one of them is rightfully pissed off, puffed up, and spitting at anyone who dares reach for them. Rhett's hands are torn to hell. Archie nearly lost an eye.

The Reader knows right away that they're going to wind up with at least one. Because Bob keeps peeking into the box and giggling when a flurry of hissing erupts, muttering under his breath about how he just wants to play with them. It does take him some time to coax them out, but by morning, he's befriended one of the white kittens. She may be small, but she's on his heels like a trained killer. Climbing up his sweats, squealing at the top of her lungs, and biting at his fingers.

She's a keeper.

The second kitten is chosen when Rhett takes a nap on the couch and wakes to find that the calico has cuddled up on his chest. Only to puff up and scratch his jaw when he tries to touch her, but she refuses to get off of him.

The white kitten is named after the mother cat from Aristocats, Duchess. And the one-eyed calico...her name is Egg. Because Bob was cooking once, and she knocked an entire carton of eggs off the counter. What better way to memorialize Bob's ruined breakfast plan then by naming the cat after it?

Archie finds this missing mom about two weeks later, just as feral and vicious as her babies. But what do you know, his wife came to the ranch one afternoon and had that damn cat purring in her lap before the sun had set. The cat is now affectionately named Rose, and she's treated better than most people.

Meanwhile, the remaining three find homes on their own. Archie takes the black one, and Rueben and Mickey drive four hours just for the remaining white, but the orange takes a while. He's an adventurous handful who gets his head stuck in a discarded peanut butter jar and somehow got shut in the fridge for about fifteen minutes (he was found snuggling with the jam and the butter).

Until Jake, in the middle of some cross-country road trip, spent the night and impulsively adopted the little ball of mischief. A match made in hell. Where he goes, that cat goes. Walks at the beach, hiking, swimming, road trips, and vacations. The cat even comes to the bar with him.

And then, of course, is the time that Rhett buys a handful of button quail from some guy at the gas station. Despite his avid despise of chickens, Rhett's built a nice little pen for the quail, borderline luxury. It's learned very quickly that Egg will steal the eggs...don't ask how Rhett managed to pry the delicate thing out of her greedy little jaws.

It was traumatic for both of them.

Once, the three were snuggled up on the couch, recovering from a flu that even had the cats sneezing when an advertisement for a local animal shelter flashed across the television. Rhett had pointed to one of the dogs in the background, curled up in the back of its kennel, unnoticed by the person filming. Bob had jokingly said they should go visit the poor thing, not really intending to follow through, but the Reader just couldn't get it out of their head.

So, spontaneously, on a day off, they visited the shelter and spent a half hour searching for the little thing. Until they found him, a German Shepherd-Australian Cattle Dog mix named River by a previous owner. He'd been returned four times for herding children, escaping, and being an overall hellion. One of many, many backyard-bred dogs with too much energy to be a stay-at-home family dog.

The Reader isn't so sure about adopting them, this dog needs a job that they can't exactly provide but they keep coming by every Thursday to take River on a walk, and Rhett's starting to take notice, eventually tagging along to meet River for himself.

You can imagine Bob's surprise when he came home to a new dog in the house. Just a two-week trial to see if they're the right fit because Rhett's gotten it in his head that this dog has what it takes to work on a ranch. He's trained ranch dogs back in Wabang; it's nothing particularly new to him.

It's the longest six months of everyone's lives, keeping River out of the cat litter, breaking him of stealing food, and teaching him his manners, but one way or another, River joins the family. He's got an outdoor kennel and a doggie door to choose when he goes in and out (which is now fully cat-proofed because Egg got out and went on an adventure once).

He floats about the house on days off, hops in the truck with Rhett when he heads off to work, and he's taken to herding cattle a lot quicker than anyone could have expected. River does prefer to lounge in his outdoor area over indoor, but he'll come up to steal some snuggles on the couch every once in a while. Rhett's his primary victim; there have been many times when someone's walked in the living room to find Rhett and River knocked out, snoring.

Likewise, Rhett's been photographed many a time sleeping with his horse while on the clock. Sometimes, there's an hour or two where they're waiting for something to get finished, and there's nothing else to do. So he finds himself a nice spot in the grass, lays down, and slowly but surely, his mare Isabela comes wandering over. Most of the time, she'll just sit and "stand guard" while he naps, but every once in a while, she'll lie down nearby.

The Reader and Bob are cat magnets. They can lay down just about anywhere and wake to a collection of felines around and on them. Bob once fell asleep on the porch swing and woke up to the neighbor's tabby sitting on his legs. And Egg will actively curl herself around someone's head if she can get away with it without waking someone up.

Bob also just...comes home with a duck one day. Found it injured on the side of the road, so of course, he had to pick it up, take it to the vet, and bring it home. And well, the duck has to have friends, and ideally, they need to be in groups of five to six.

So now they have seven ducks that just do their own thing. They go up in their pen every night, are let out when Bob gets up, and wander about the fenced-in portion of the property, quacking about how they plan to kick Rhett's ass the next time they see him.

That's how Rhett views it, anyway.

Normal animals and chickens aside, they don't really own any farm animals. Mostly because nobody has the energy to look after them, and they already get their fix through Rhett's job. Want to meet this year's crop of lambs? Goats? The new donkey? What about Archie's new mule? Calves? They're all a hop and a skip away at Rhett's place of work, free to visit whenever.

Rhett's also a primary catalyst in the "no farm animals" category, primarily because he knows how much of a responsibility those animals can be. It's no fun being stuck at home taking care of animals and not being able to go on vacations because you have nobody to look after them while you're gone.

Though there is the odd occasion where a heifer rejects her calf or passes unexpectedly, and Rhett winds up bringing the baby home to keep an eye on for the night... who would have thought that you could fit a calf in the passenger seat of a truck?

💃💐 🦆

[emeritus-fuckers]

Sister Imperator NSFW headcanons

Applying to both younger and older versions of Sister Imperator. Papa Nihil is mentioned.

Sister actually enjoys watching more than the act itself.

There is something exciting about seeing how helpless she can make her lover with some toys and just a few touches.

She enjoys your taste, but mostly she just licks the juices off after you've finished, she rarely actually uses her mouth on you.

She'll gently drag her fingers down your things, scratching your skin with her nails, leaving soft red marks.

When she's younger, she's much more likely to suddenly use her fingers against you. As she grows older, she's much more gentle.

No matter the age, she loves teasing you. The difference is that when she's younger, she's much more likely to degrade you. She's much more into hushed praises now.

Absolute dom, no questions asked. You don't get to do anything she doesn't allow you to. You might as well not even think on your own.

Younger Sister Imperator is very likely to make you wear a collar and drag you around on a leash while she confidently struts around the Ministry. If she's at a meeting, you're sitting on the floor next to her while she strokes your head.

Once she's older, she won't need a collar or leash. You'll be trained to react to a snap of her fingers. You'll be there whenever she says the word "pet". You do get a proper seat this time, however. Either your own chair or a small couch in the corner of her office.

She's very sharp and observant. She knows everything about you, and that's not limited to your sexual preferences. She knows everything.

Will make you her personal assistant just to keep you close.

She's possessive. Especially after the Kiss the Go-goat incident. You barely get to leave her sight.

If you and her are a thing when Nihil is still in the picture, she will make you to do it in front of her just so she can watch her two lovers together. (Nihil does quite enjoy the deal)

She'll be very quiet, you'll probably forget she's even there if you didn't hear her soft moans as she strokes her clit in her comfortable armchair, enjoying the view.

She might give you two commands as well. You both better pray she allows you to cum, otherwise she will absolutely turn it into torture.

Very likely to tie either you up and make you watch as she fucks Nihil, too. Or tie him up and make him watch the two of you. Really depends on who annoyed her more.

After the Nihil incident, though? He's not ever even gonna see you again.

You're only hers. Nobody gets to touch you inappropriately. She barely lets you talk to anyone anymore, honestly. At least at first, she calms down eventually (except if it comes to you and Nihil, you two are not allowed in the same room ever again unless it's a sermon, during which she demands you hold her hand the entire time).

In her youth, she enjoys showing you off. When she's older, everything is much more private and intimate.

She also gives more aftercare when she's older. She'll bring you a cup of tea, say how well you did for her and how precious you are. She'll hold you as long as you need, tuck you in and stroke your hair until you get a much deserved nap. When she was younger, it was mostly just a glass of water and some cuddling, maybe a few kisses.

Usually the act is about you. Sister herself has a relatively low sex drive, she just enjoys watching you, as said before.

Also, she has a mommy kink. Especially when she's older. Call her mommy. She is mommy.

Can you all tell how much I simp for this woman? - Jez

[the-back-matter]

Muses as pets/animals :

Fujiko

A very cuddly and affectionate Siamese cat. Always the one to welcome you home with brushes to the leg, asking to be held. She has an affinity for the tv and is usually pretty quick to join you when she hears it being turned on. Her favorite places to hide/chill out are in your closet or in your open dresser drawers. They're like little nest piles for her.

Reid

A moody Maine Coon. Switches from being affectionate and cuddly to being cold and reclusive. Gets jealous when you pay attention to other things/people or smell like other cats (except her sister) and will pout for the rest of the day. Likes to sleep next to you in bed. She will get into all of the foods you don't want her to get into and likes to eat table food. Not at all a fan of catnip.

Riley

A rowdy and chatty Maine Coon, but she acts more like a dog than a cat. Likes to roughhouse/play with her sister and her human(s). Likes to wander outside and tends to come home dirty, so the need for a bath with her is often. But she hates actual water baths so good luck wrestling her into the tub. Prone to biting to get her way. Likes to sleep on top of your chest or your feet when you're in bed. Whichever causes you more issues.

Chouko

Okay hear me out when I say that Chouko is a Pygmy Goat. A small but very active and friendly friend. Loves to meet new people and other animals. Unfortunately she's very active and if you don't have her leashed or in a large enclosed space, you're going to have to chase her down if she gets too excited.

Aika

A shy but very loving dwarf chinchilla. Quiet and incontroversional, she's enjoys having the enclosed space that is her cage and doesn't like to explore when she's taken out. She bonds extremely well with her human and always make little happy noises in their presence but it takes her a while to open up to new people. Cuddle times are a must and she'd more than not chew/nibble on hair/clothing as a way to show her affection.

Val

A lovely mini lop that's as sweet as she is fragile. A cuddle buddy through and through that adores people, so she gets along with most. Her energy levels differ from day to day so some days she might be in the mood to play 'games' like hide and seek and other days she's solely a cuddle fiend. She does suffer from the 'snuffles' so a little extra care is needed.

Seika

An ever curious (Blue-Eyed Leucistic) ball python. The one that always plays nice around others but there's plenty of reasons why she's riddled you with bite marks. Her ways of affection are always concerning: wrapping herself around your arms and neck, small love bites here and there, licking at your face (especially if you know she hasn't eaten just yet). Pretty picky about her food and will play with any food she doesn't like until you feed her something else.

Andrew

A black golden retriever with nothing but love and excitement for the world. Everything that you can expect from a goldie: silly, affectionate, active. He's the type that'd want a more active human so that the two can constantly play and be outside but he'd also be fine being an at-home dog. Very vocal and likes to 'sing' a lot, lol. He has a couple of other dog friends around the block and often wants to go out to meet/play with them.

Yuuki

A hyper-independent pomeranian. One you probably found off the street rather than through adopting. The amount of convincing you have to do to get him to do things is unfortunate and there's still a chance he'd still ignore your requests. It takes a while for him to warm up to people and even once he's comfortable with you he's still not affectionate.

Pets are rare and you can't pick him up unless he needs to get to higher places. He will bite you if you continue to try to pick him up. He's active, though, and is always willing to go on walks or play. Doesn't like playing with any of the smaller dogs at the dog park and always wants to play with the bigger dogs. Picky about the food he eats and sometimes he genuinely has a bad time eating things, but those days are easy to pick out as it's his low-energy day.

Ishin

Legal Option: A kai ken that almost feels like an old soul. Even as a puppy he was very well behaved and easy to train. Perfect with both kids and other pets but if he's bigger than them he will play/tease them. Very observant and likes to watch others. His favorite thing to do is stand in doorways because it mildly inconveniences others.

Illegal Option: A... surprisingly friendly silver fox. Not really considered your pet, but he's around and obedient enough to essentially be called so. Quiet and social towards other people and animals. You need to have permission to touch/pet him. Will occasionally bring back 'treasures' (twigs, small rocks, leaves) from any neighboring forests or park to show his affection.

Idris

A pompous (if not entitled) Standardized Poodle. You can believe that you've properly trained him but he will always act out on his own accord and will make you deal with the repercussions. Loves to play around and toy with other animals and humans. It's easy to tell that he just loves the attention either way and, as you can imagine, he will get upset when you don't pay attention to him. He will bark and fuss and pout but, if you ignore him long enough, he'll probably leave you alone to cause some chaos elsewhere. And don't let his fully exterior get the best of you, he can absolutely be as vicious as any dog and will always be ready to attack anyone that threatens his human.

Orion

Legal Option: A box turtle, more than likely. Unassuming, for the most part, and you'd expect that as much from the little guy swimming around in his tank. But, on occasion, you'd hear such aggressive thumping and sloshing from where his tank would sit. He was absolutely doing flips and jumping off the top of his artificial rocks into the water. It would go on for minutes to the hour for no other reason than he found it fun.

Illegal Option: A penguin. That also secretly a menace. Picks up all of the bad/silly habits that you display around him. Not talkative by any means, but will have 'conversations' with you if you talk to him first. If you use animal buttons with him, the amount of profanity he'd use is astounding....

Akashi

A doberman-husky mix that works as a service dog. Pretty aloof towards anyone other than his human but can be pretty intimidating just by first glance. Behind closed doors, though, he's can be pretty affectionate and likes to lay on top of his human (if he can) as his main display of affection. He's great with kids and other animals and is generally a big softie.

[chickensarentcheap]

3, 5, 14, 18,19, 20 for Tyler and Esme?

Thank you so much! <3

3. Do they wear each other's clothes?

Esme is notorious for poaching items from Tyler's side of the closet lol. His t-shirts, dress shirts, hoodies, nothing is off limits. And she is so tiny that everything is absolutely enormous on her. But she is his stuff is the most comfy and she'll never stop lol

5. Describe their cozy night in

Definitely pyjamas, all the snacks they hide from the kids, cuddling on the couch, and either a movie or some reality television

14. How do their personalities compliment each other? how do they clash?

Esme is very much an extrovert. She's very outgoing, very sunny personality, loves to meet people, very chatty. Tyler on the other hand is introvert. The 'strong, silent type' for the most part. He always says that when they attend events, parties, etc, he likes that he can just stand there and let her do all the talking and socializing. They clash in the morning: he's a morning grump who needs a cup of coffee with four shots of espresso and enjoys his silence, whereas she's very energetic and talks his ear off lol. They're also both phenomenally stubborn people. That causes some issues as neither wants to be the first to acknowledge defeat in a fight and apologize.

18. How likely are they to have fur babies? How many and what kind?

Both love animals and in the main series, have many pets! They have two dogs (a german shepherd and an australian shepherd), a turtle, a few hamsters and a couple guinea pigs, a bearded dragon, four goats, a dozen chickens, and two pot bellied pigs :)

19, How do they feel about PDA?

Both are comfortable with it. Little kisses, hugs, holding hands, arms around each other

20. Choose one sing that perfectly describes their relationship:

I Found by Amber Run. It's actually the song that inspired the very first fic :D

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

I'm deeply ready for the days off I've planned for myself, including PRIDE night for me and wifey (and maybe some new clothes to go with? Neither of us have had a new outfit in over a year. I think maybe for wifey for sure, as her wardrobe always take harder and faster hits than mine does)

I've got a nice four day lil 4 day weekend, and a 3 day weekend to follow, so hopefully by the end of it, I will be feeling much better rested and will have gotten a few things handked around the house.

God and I have our anniversary to plan for next month already, and I'm still neck deep in initial planning for our tenth so I honestly don't even know what that's gonna look like. Maybe just a nice dinner at our favorite place? And maybe buying a new movie to watch together and cuddle. A nice jug of cider for me to spice up.

Lord I'm just tired all the time lmao, and I'm trying to get myself in order, but I'm just usually so busy or exhausted or we've run thru the paycheck for the week, or whatever the fuck.

We definitely need to buy and build the chicken run first thing during my long weekend, because it's almost butchering day for the waffles, and the ladies are almost big enough to deserve real exercise space (the hen house is huge lol, and until now genuinely has been big enough for them all to not need outdoor space at all). They can managw another week together in there with no consequences, but after that, they're gonna need their outdoor run.

I think I'll buy the berry bushes and the fencing supplies all in one go so I don't have to worry about coming back to it later and disrupting the ladies. Which really means I need to find a local nursery with native berry bushes, because I don't feel up to driving all the way down the mountain to Ream in the same weekend if I don't have to. I can save that trip for picking up our trees later in the sunmer.

Man, I really am looking forward to having the garden set up and the ladies grown enough to lay. Free fresh eggs are a huge relief on our budget, especially if we keep doing periodic waves of meat birds to keep cutting down our meat budget alongside it. I'm thinking probably 2-3 sets of meat birds per year, maybe a dozen each time? I'm never doing Cornish Rocks again tho, these little abominations are a disaster to raise. Literally every bird we lost (4 total) was a fuckin Waffle, and they always died for the stupidest reasons. One literally just ate too much and then passed out for a nap under the heat lamp until he got heat stroke because he didn't bother also hydrating???? The only other birds I've raised with this kind of mortality rate are fuckin great white turkeys and they drown in the goddamn rain. Apparently it's not just us either. If I'd taken the time to research more instead of trusting the meat and egg chick mix, I'd have seen all the other homesteaders online panicking about half their flock dying and meing warned by more experienced folks that Cornishes are really only viable for industrial scale farming that can reliably take those kinds of losses. In retrospect, now that I *do* know that, I'm almost proud we managed to keep 80% of our Waffles alive.

Point being, I'm never going through that again. There are plenty of heritage meat birds, and I'll be sticking with them please and thank you.

I've considered starting to do rabbit too? It would cut down on our pet food costs a fair bit, and then maybe I could co-graze themand the chickens in a tractor along the yard to manage overgrowth of ground cover. I'd prefer a goat obvi, but I don't think the council will let me have one, even if wifey would lmao. That's definitely a later thing tho. Gotta get the humans more sustainably fed before I can consider any new livestock lmao

I think the chicken run, the berry bushes, the first order of seeds, and a chest freezer are probably the major expenses this coming paycheck. We might be able to postpone the chest freezer? Our freezer isn't overly full at present, and I think could actually fit 20 processed Waffles if needed. We'll need one soon regardless tho, cuz it definitely won't fit the next butchering day product at that point, nor the frozen fruits, veggies, and easy preps we'll be starting to make over the summer. So if not this pay period, then the next one.

God, I guess that means I should prep all my orders so I can place them first thing on Friday when I get paid, and price out the batches. Ughhhh I'm so busy today, that's gonna be hard to make time for during my breaks, and after work it's dinner and eorzea time, plus probably some tidying.

Awww fuck i gotta bring in the washing too and maybe do another load.

Whatever. Point is, I'm gonna be busy for a while. Which is good. But also means I have less time to sit and think and write which does make me a lil sad. It's just until harvest season is through tho! Once everything is planted and plucked and canned and stored, I'll be back to having time for other things. I'm probably gonna prioritize my writing and my sewing thru the winter so I can be ready for fiber processing in spring and publishing season in summer/fall. I'll want to get back to the zine soon too, because I really do want to add in the documentation I've been building around appalachian riperians

Lordt

Someone needs to tell my brain to pick a goddamn lane. This is how I end up pulled in so many directions that nothing gets done lmao

[marshmallowprotection]

Kait!! Look, Saeyoung will be in heaven!! They are around like.. 15-17 cats in general lmfao

Wanna know the most fun part? YOU CAN PET NEARLY EVERY SINGLE ONE. In fact, most of them even follow you around for head pats and cuddles! The 5 kittens here will think you're their parent and the others usually want some head scratches!

There are these 3 gray and white cats who only follow you for head scratches (the third one took a bit to trust me and today I head him purring for the first time, he has such a quiet purr though-)

They are these two very identical white with some black cats who start licking you even if all you did is stroke their head like.. one time. They keep rubbing your leg and meow at you. (Although they'll mostly lick whatever skin they find on you AHAHAHA)

Saeyoung will be so happy LMFAO. Wait until I tell him that we have like 50 or so chickens and a BIG ASS field! We got like.. infinite eggs!! There's even a garden here where we raise vegetables as well~

We used to have two dogs and goats but they aren't here anymore. Honestly, I would have LOVED to see Saeyoung do the same thing my uncle did with a goat LMFAO

My uncle basically sat on a goat's back and did a gesture like he was riding a motorcycle by touching it's horns ANDHWHDH

And you actually need a car or to use a bus to get around here where I am. So I think that Saeyoung would be very happy driving around here! Although he'll need somewhere to park his car and sadly, I don't think he can bring his whole collection T_T

We even have a beach near us so I think he'll also be very happy to go and relax there! I remember someone fishing one day while I passed by my grandma to dive in. So I think Saeyoung would be really happy about it!

Ah, I wish I could also ride the bike with Saeyoung! Would be fun doing races! The current ones we have are uncomfortable to ride sadly.

The bittersweet thing is that while no one is riding their bikes here like back then, the house in front of us has two kids and even some relatives who come with their own kids and today they played outside! Reminded me so much of the old good days.

It's funny how it used to be one or two kids from nearly each house but now it's only one house, although they don't play that often outside. I had a smile watching them, though.^^

I was originally gonna ramble a bit about Yatora but I think I'll leave it for another ask, Kait! I have a lot to ramble about him as well SKDHWJD

It's been a while since I rambled about doing things with Saeyoung, hehe. I love both Saeyoung and Yatora so much, I'm so happy they are in my life! I wanna shower them both with so much affection and make them a flustered mess~!

I hope you have been doing well, Kait! It's really warm these days so stay hydrated and take care! <3

See, that is also a literal heaven for me. I would love to just flop over on the ground and have a dozen cats decide to be my best friend. Honestly, who doesn't want to do that? Who doesn't want to be swarmed by a dozen cats? I'm sure maybe somebody who is allergic might feel that way, but that ain't me and I am here to pet some kitties. But, I think it's worth saying that Saeyoung would eat this up, too.

He clearly is the kind of person who wants to enjoy the outdoors. He loves animals more than anything so if you put him in a chicken coop and tell him to go crazy, I'm pretty sure the situation will turn into something where he is either getting chased down by the entire flock or he's helping them get exercise. Either way, you're going to laugh at him when he inevitably trips in the mud. Farm life is not for him but he's going to fight for it.

Can you imagine that? I don't know if Yatora would do that to you but... It's still funny.

[stocious]

ben, carl & the pack, let's go.

ben: remember how i was supposed to pick up the dog today? carl: aw, where's the ba- ben, opening the trunk:🙂

after a while the boys get the very strong feeling halloween might be actually possessed. everyone still loves him.

baz and carl love to watch those "let me change your entire style" shows. and the great bake off. ben joins them for golden girls marathons when the weather changes in october.

ginger snap's a very trusty sports partner, he goes swimming with ben and running with carl. but he'll also steal their pancakes.

ben & tony are one heart and soul. ben's sad? no, dad, play something on the kalimba, it'll help. (carl taught him, actually, because he noticed it.)

carl, out of breath and exasperated: why are you and dirty in the goat pen. AGAIN. ben: he's a CATTLE dog, carl, i don't want him to get DEPRESSED.

carl: walking in on ben and machete. carl: what the FUCK are you trying to teach him now. ben: ... law.

ben, trying to coax jims, who has had bad staircase experiences due to his gangly limbs. down to go for a walk. carl: just carry him- ben: he can DO THIS, just give him TIME- carl: you've been at this for FIVE HOURS.

carl: does mini carl really need a massage pillo- ben: he's not AGGRESSIVE, he's ANXIOUS, this HELPS.

snickers loves whipped cream. carl feeds him when ben doesn't look. don't tell the others, but he's carl's favourite.

firecrotch has many opinions about the pack's diet. ben: 🥺 carl: babe, NO, the dogs CAN'T have burgers every night.

carl: did you let van damme hang out with the neighbour's shepherd again? ben: yeah, they're besties :3 carl: honey, our dog's a mafia leader.

seagal just wants cuddles. he's also a cockblock for his dads.

SO MANY PUPPERS IN MY ASK 🥰 and carl + ben + puppers adventures? you truly are a treat nosho!

-halloween IS called halloween after all. maybe he's always been a little possessed? but you're right, everyone still loves him!

-do you think baz knows that trick? i think he does. that's the only tick carl has taught any of the dogs. because golden girls.

-GO GINGER! HE'S FAST AS FUCK BOI. he loves running and swimming and fetch and zoomies and!!! you can always count on ginger snap to be your work out partner. we love him for it.

-tony is the best emotional support pupper in all the land. he gets the big sad. he will cuddle with you and lay in bed all day if you need it. but he'll also encourage you to get up eventually. he's a good boi. (they all are)

-dirty loves all his friends in all the shapes and sizes. he loves the goats though. they're his favorite.

-chettie making shady deals AND knowing law? is he the evil villian in the pup pack? machete pleads the fifth to that question.

-OH NO JIMS. poor baby. you can do it! we have treats and pets and cuddles down here! i believe in you slim jimmy! maybe he needs tony for emotional support?

-MINI CARL DOES INDEED NEED A NECK MASSAGE. big carl is just jealous. it's okay big carl, you can have a neck massage after mini carl is done (never).

-snickers likes 'em sweet. carl has all the treats. carl is snickers favorite too.

-no burgers? how about a tasty stake? no? but he makes such convincing paw geastures!

-everyone thinks machete is the evil genious. but no, it's van damme. he has all the neighbourhood doggies running deals for him and he just sits back and gets his cut. he's smart like that.

-he's always sneaking his way into the bed, smack dab in the middle. on his back. slobering all over the sheets. but he's a cutie so that's okay. if he happens to cockblock, that sounds like a carl and ben problem for going at it in HIS bed.

[not-that-syndrigast]

personally, I would choose Cody. I think we are in similar positions and share a few struggles but he also seems like the kind of person to enjoy the same things as me.

I would spend the three days actually rather boring. One day I would spend doing my regular weekend activities, hanging around the library and the haven, I feel like you could spend a great time together silently just reading in each others company and then eating something for the general comfort.

Another day I would spend going out. I love nature and hiking and we got some cool historical places in my area I would definitely like to show more people, plus a cute pick-nick because hell why not and maybe visit a petting zoo because I like petting little baby goats and he should try it out some time.

And the last day I would personally spend making a short trip anywhere, I like driving places let it be car or train and the time can be spent with various great activities (talking, watching shows, cuddling) and see new places (possibly some he would be interested in?)

If you had 3 days to spend with your favorite clone, what would you do? And would you be in an established relationship or just falling in love? I wanna hear all the cheesy daydreams. 😂