#and I wasn't sure what hot takes meant so I just took a guess and took them as idea for the ship

[froggibus]

hiiiii :3 idk if ur taking reqs for dc right neow but a thought that tickles my brain rlly good is dick grayson/reader w a praise kink and dick exploits it n uses it to his advantage.... preferably afab reader but gn is fine :P

CTRL + H - Dick Grayson

Pairing: Dick Grayson x fem! best friend! reader (uses fem pronouns + has a pussy)

Genre: smut/NSFW

Word Count: 4.1k

Summary: when your best friend discovers porn in your browser history while fixing your computer, he decides to use it to his advantage

CW: friends to lovers, lots of praise, uses of ‘good/pretty/lovely girl’ dick calls you sweetheart/angel, dick is CORNY I’m sorry, mentions of porn/asmr porn, teasing, gaslighting (but not really), fingering, marking, unprotected sex, lots of sweat (its sexy i swear), dick fucks you over a desk, kinda rough sex, creampie, multiple orgasms, implied to be summer, i think thats it??

hey hi 👽 anon, thanks for the request! im sorry it took so long, it wasn't meant to be this long i swear, i just got caught up in the thought of Dick being all hot and sweaty and praising you while fucking you >~< and yeah this happened. really hope you like it (but if you don't, let me know and ill totally rewrite it!) lots of love yes i took an extra 30 mins to find nightwing #83 to take a picture of the comic book to make this banner lol

As if having Dick Grayson look at your search history wasn’t bad enough, now you have to live with the mortifying ordeal of him knowing you have a praise kink.  

When you had first invited him over to take a look at your malfunctioning computer, you’d thought nothing of it. You figured he would turn it on and off again, maybe update some drivers. So when he suddenly clicked into your browser and began scrolling through the long, long list of websites you’ve visited, you weren’t sure how to react. 

You noticed it at the same time as him, the glowing screen forcing you to freeze where you stand. There on the screen, from just last night, read: praise nsfw asmr. You swallow hard and lunge for the mouse to click out of your browser history, but breathe a sigh of relief when Dick does it first. 

There’s a beat of silence, your racing thoughts deafeningly loud as you try to come up with a reason to kick him out. Fanning your face as if that will help chase away the heat of the day, you swallow once more in an attempt to work some moisture back into your mouth. 

“F—find anything?” You say as casually as you can. 

It’s ridiculous how embarrassed you are, honestly. He’s just your friend, it’s just porn, it’s not like it’s the end of the world. Still, the rattling of your heart against your rib cage and his cruelly quiet silence make it feel like it is. 

He shakes his head. “Not so far, I should keep looking but—“ he flicks his eyes up your body, perfect blues tracing your every curve, “you seemed flustered.”

You raise your hands in denial all too quickly, your sweaty palms stretched out towards him. Dick raises an eyebrow, examining you in the way he does with strangers in coffee shops. 

“I just…don’t see how my search history is relevant, I guess. That’s all.”

He grabs your wrists, lowering your arms from the defensive position they’ve taken. Despite the familiarity of his touch, something feels off, different in a way you can’t explain. You shake the thought away. 

The world has not shifted on its axis because your best friend suddenly knows what kind of porn you’re into. 

His touch lingers on your wrist and he uses the leverage to gently pull you closer to where he sits at your desk. When he finally drops your wrist, a chill circles the space where his hand once was, refreshing your feverish skin.

“I just want to make sure you haven’t accidentally picked up a virus somewhere. If we can find one in your history, it’ll be much easier to get rid of it.”

The explanation only half seeps into the mush your brain has turned into under his gaze and you find yourself nodding without quite understanding. 

You were fooling yourself by inviting him here. While asking for his help was cheaper than hiring a professional, having him so close to you almost hurts—especially when lately you’ve been trying to force away the feelings you’ve harboured for him. 

“So,” Dick says again, “won’t you be a good girl and let me fix your computer for you?”

His words force you out of your thoughts, purely by short circuiting your brain. You blink at him with wide eyes, your heart pounding in your chest. 

“W—what did you say?”

“I just asked if I could fix your computer now.” 

You tilt your head in confusion. Did you mishear him, or did he call you ‘good girl’? He flashes you that signature smirk of his, his blue eyes suddenly dark with something you don’t recognize. 

Though everything on his face reads innocent, something not-so innocent lurks beneath the surface. Something that stares you down and screams ‘challenge me’. 

“Yeah.” You swallow. “I guess that’s fine.” You take a deep breath and try to steady the spinning in your head. 

Dick continues his work nonchalantly, hitting a few keys and opening your browser history once more. You turn your eyes away from the screen, instead focusing on the way your fingers grasp the desk until it hurts. 

You listen to him scroll for a while and try to pretend like he’s not looking through the most intimate part of your life. The idea of him seeing that part of you excites you as much as it nauseates you—a lethal combination. 

“You can relax.” Dick hums. 

You lift your head to look at him just to see him focused completely on the screen. You don’t dare glance at what he’s so focused on. 

“Why not sit down? This could take a while.” He says calmly. “I’m sure you’ll feel much better if you do.” 

You roll your shoulders. “I think I’ll just stand.”

There’s a shift in his eyes as if your words sparked something in them. He finally glances away from your screen, completely focusing on you with a newfound intensity. You want to shrink from his gaze, to run down the hall and hide in your broom closet, but you stay rooted in place. 

“It would help me a lot if you sit down. Don’t you want to be a good girl and help me out?” 

Holy fuck. “What did you just say?”

It feels like you’re waiting an eternity for him to speak again, your heart beating a mile a minute. He’s going to deny it, or make fun of you even more or worse—tell Wally about it. 

He pats his lap. “Come sit with me,” he purrs, “be a good girl, keep me company while I work.”

In your shock, you find yourself shuffling towards him and settling in his lap. Dick helps you adjust, tugging you back to his chest and keeping one arm around you while his other reaches for the mouse once more. 

He’s so close to you that you can feel the beating of his heart, his breath on your neck. You close your eyes and pray that he can’t feel the heartbeat that’s suddenly appeared between your legs.

You can’t remember a single time he’s been this close to you, a single time he’s touched you like this. The sudden proximity makes you dizzy, butterflies taking flight in your tummy. You clench the arm rests on either side in an attempt to keep your cool.

Dick shifts behind you, one of his thighs gently brushing your clit in a way that makes you squirm. “Don’t do that!” 

His hand slides from your waist to grip your thigh, a shiver running up your spine at the contact. “Don't do what? This?” He repeats the motion.

You squeak, lurching forward in an attempt to get away from the friction. You tilt too far and suddenly you’re falling head over heels towards the mat beneath your chair. Dick is quicker than that, wrapping one arm around your chest and another around your waist to tug you harshly back to him.

“Don’t do that,” you repeat breathlessly, “please.”

He rests his chin on your shoulder, soft strands of black hair tickling your cheek. “Why not? Use your words, angel.”

The nickname reignites something inside of you, rekindling a fire between your legs. You clench them together in the hopes it will do something to muffle the throbbing, but when you feel Dick smirk against the side of your neck, you know you’ve failed.

When you don’t answer him, he grins his knee between your legs once more, an innocent hum prompting you.

“You’re—fuck, you’re kneeing me in the cunt.”

Dick’s not sure if it’s from your brazen words or how entirely ridiculous this whole afternoon has been, but suddenly he’s laughing. A big, open mouthed, creasing at the corners of his eyes, laugh. 

His laugh surprises you enough to summon one of your own, sending you both into a fit. You shift on his lap to look at him, wrapping your arms around his neck to support yourself while the two of you laugh. It’s stupid and ridiculous and you’re not quite sure what you’re laughing at—just that you are. 

You’re laughing and laughing and suddenly his lips are on yours and his eyes are closed and—fuck, he’s kissing you. And then you’re not laughing anymore, your hands brushing up his neck and tangling in his hair. He’s not laughing anymore either, his hands gripping your waist like he expects you to leave at any moment.

You’re breathless when you pull away, refusing to open your eyes and face the reality in front of you. Because maybe the world didn’t shift on its axis when he learned your porn preferences, but it definitely has because he just kissed you.

He taps your cheek gently, using that terribly calm voice he does whenever you start spiralling. “Y/n.” He coos, “open your eyes, y/n.”

You bite your lip, shaking your head in refusal. You know as soon as you do, you’ll have to confront your feelings for him, and his for you, and all of that is just too much and god, when did it get so hot in here? 

You open your eyes one at a time, casting them down to where your thighs rest on his. Your hands come together, fingers twirling in your lap just to give you something to focus on other than the throbbing in your clit and the weight of Dick’s eyes on you.

He drags a finger down your overheating cheeks, tracing the outline of your jaw and tipping your head up to face him. His blue eyes are lined with something new, something darker—a need you’ve never seen before. 

“Look at me.” There’s a commanding tone to his voice before it softens, “c’mon, please?”

You finally force yourself to meet his eyes, the familiar ultramarine calming the sudden bite of your nerves. “Only cause you asked so nicely,” you say quietly. 

“Good girl,” he smiles and it feels like the sun pushing through rain clouds. He strokes your cheek gently, his thumb landing on your cupid's bow. 

You shiver beneath his touch despite the unbearable heat of the day. While his finger on your lips threatens to send you flying away, spiralling into space, his other does the opposite. His grip on your hip is tight, fingers digging in and sure to leave behind bruises. 

“Can I kiss you again?” He asks quietly. 

It’s only a small mercy that your nod doesn’t prompt another ‘good girl’ from him, or some other horribly delightful variation of it. However, when his lips brush yours and his hand slides to the base of your throat, all of the thoughts melt away. There’s no embarrassment, no overthinking, just raw emotion and the sensation of his skin on yours. 

You shift in his lap, sliding one of your thighs over his so you can straddle him. Dick offers a guiding hand while you slide forward, half steadying you, half tugging you closer. You shimmy up the length of his jeans until you’re as close as possible, your stomach pressing into his toned abs. 

A gasp leaves your throat when your clit brushes the very edge of the bulge in his jeans, the noise only edging him along. His teeth graze your bottom lip, both gentle and desperate, before his tongue slips into your mouth. 

The taste of him is intoxicating, consuming you until you’re grabbing his cheeks with both hands to pull him as close as possible. You whine when his cock grazes your clit again and Dick breaks the kiss to let out a breathy laugh against your lips. 

“Someone’s needy,” he teases, but his eyes are rimmed with dark and when he looks at you through his lashes, all you see is need. 

“Back at you.”

His palm sticks to your cheek with sweat when he goes to pull it away. “You’ve been so good for me today,” he hums, his other hand trailing up your thigh. “Let me take care of you, yeah?”

You mumble a breathy ‘please’ before his fingers are brushing your clit through your pants, the heat pooling in your panties near insatiable. You tighten your grip on him and bury your face in the tight black fabric of his t-shirt to muffle your heavy breathing.

While one hand rubs intense figure eights up the length of your pussy, his other hand is fiddling with the buttons of your pants. He sighs in triumph at the soft popping noise and then the fabric is pulling away from your skin, Dick somehow managing to tug them down with only one hand. 

You shift in his lap and prop yourself up on your knees to give him better access while he drags the fabric down your thighs. He takes advantage of your position to spin you to face your monitor once more, leaning back in the chair so you’re reclined against his muscled chest.

Warm breath fans the overheating skin of your neck just where your shirt meets your skin. Two calloused fingers dip into the waistband of your underwear, skimming the warmth and slick of your cunt. Dick sucks in a breath, his pants suddenly too tight.

“You really are needy,” he swallows hard. “Lovely, needy girl.”

His words only serve as a catalyst to the intense need you feel in your core, amplifying your desire tenfold. The pad of his index finger brushes your clit and you’re suddenly a goner. Your eyes squeeze shut and you throw your head back, imagining the circles of Dick’s fingers in your mind.

He gently kisses at the neckline of your shirt, his lips soft against the sensitive skin. His tongue runs across the sensitive skin there in tandem with the moving of his hand, the duality sending shockwaves through you. You have to bite your lip to keep from crying out his name.

His wrist slides further into your underwear, fingers moving away from your swollen clit to run along the rim of your aching pussy. You suck in a breath, not moving an inch while you anticipate what’s to come.

Dick sucks a dark mark into your neck. “Ready f’me?” He mumbles into your skin.

You eagerly nod, trying to shift your hips into his fingers and shove them inside of you, but Dick moves away. You frown, lazily looking over your shoulder at him.

“You have to use your words.”

You almost roll your eyes but in your desperation, let your head hang in defeat and open your trembling mouth. “I-I’m ready Dick,” you say, quietly adding, “please.”

“Good girl.” 

Then he’s suddenly slipping a finger inside of you, travelling the length of your spongy walls to sit deep inside of you. A gasp rips through you, his name tumbling off your lips faster than you can catch it. He grips your hip to steady you, strong fingers bruising the exposed skin.

He curls his finger inside of you, prodding at that sweet fucking sensitive spot. He only stops when you whine, slipping his finger out for only a second before shoving it back in. He repeats the motion, starting a rhythm of thrusting in and out, his hand on your hip tapping along in tandem.

You squirm in his lap, that ball in the centre of your stomach turning white hot and growing until you can barely contain it. One of your hands squeezes his wrist—whether to stop or encourage him, you don’t know.

“Dick,” you whine, your voice taking on a raspy tone you hardly recognize.

He hums in response. “Does that feel good?”

“S-so good.”

He rewards you by slipping his other finger inside of you, the two of them working in unison. His fingers are so long and thick that they reach places inside you that you’ve never been able to touch on your own, stretching your walls just enough to make your eyes roll back.

The impending waves of your orgasm roll over you, that knot in your core so tight that you know it's bound to undo any second. You squeeze his wrist tighter in warning, your fingers pressing into his veins until you can feel the steady thrum of his blood pulsing. 

Dick slips his hand from your waist up your shirt, palming your tit. “Cum for me,” he murmurs. “You’ve earned it, sweetheart.”

His words walk you right over the edge, that knot finally coming undone and sending wave after wave of molten pleasure through you. Every muscle in your body contracts, your pussy squeezing his fingers so tightly it almost hurts. Both your hands clench around the wrist currently in your underwear. Holding him steady while you ride out your high on his fingers.

Dick holds you, keeping you stable while you gush and thrash wildly in his lap. He can feel your slick soak through the fabric of his jeans, his thighs warm with your juices, but he can’t bring himself to care. 

He trails kisses up your neck to your jaw, your cheeks and finally, tips your head back until he can plant soft, chaste kisses to your lips. His wrist aches from how hard you squeeze him but he doesn’t dare pull away until your muscles are relaxing and you let out your first, panting breath.

“Feel good?” He prompts.

You shake your head vigorously, all sweaty hair and hot skin and aching lungs. Dick almost wishes he had a camera because the sight of you laying in his lap all fucked out is one he would love to savor and put in his wallet.

He shifts behind you, only now remembering his aching cock and how badly it yearns to be free of the denim confining it. “Think you could do one more? For me? It would make me feel so, so good, sweetheart.”

You don’t think twice about his words, lazily trapping his lips in a sloppy needy kiss and mumbling ‘yes’ against him. In your fucked out state, you’re only half sure that you’re even speaking, the world around you fading. Dick slips his hand out of your panties, his palm soaked with your juices, and rests it on your thigh. 

“I need you to stand up for me,” he says, only half asking. 

He helps you up on shaky knees, your pants that had been resting just above your knees dropping the rest of the way to the floor. You brace yourself against the desk, half bent over while Dick slowly tugs down your panties. The minute the sticky, soaked fabric peels away from your pussy, you gasp.

Dick stares at the mess he’s made of you proudly, your folds glistening with the slick of your last orgasm. He burns the image into his mind while he fumbles with the zipper of his jeans, standing behind you while he drags them to the floor with his boxers. His cock springs free, thick and dripping with pre cum, begging for you.

He strokes it absentmindedly, all of his thoughts only on you and your trembling thighs, bent so perfectly over the desk waiting for him. He lines the head of his cock up with your entrance, rubbing it through your folds and prodding your clit before repeating the process over again.

Each shift of his cock, each rock of his hips, forces shivers of anticipation down your spine. Heavy breaths leave your lips, your arms barely managing to hold your weight over the desk when you dip your head down to stare at him through the crook of your arm.

“Such a pretty pussy. So wet and needy,” he groans when he finally lets his cock rest at your entrance. “So ready for my cock.”

You nod even though he’s mostly talking to himself. You let your arms sag against the desk and rest your face against your forearm, the sweaty skin sticking to your forehead. Dick thrusts forwards and lets the head of his cock push inside of you.

Moans leave him the second he dips into your heat, the tip of his cock stretching you in a way that has both of your eyes rolling back. His fingers resume their earlier position on your hip, digging in so hard it almost hurts. 

He stills once his tip is nestled in your walls, listening to the whiny breaths you let out while you adjust to his size. Your clench your hands into fists, slightly shifting from left to right to help him fit better. He’s big, bigger than you expected, but the way he molds your walls to his cock is almost enough to have you cum right then and there.

Dick is so distracted by the sight of his cock dipped inside of you that he doesn’t remember to move. It’s only when you let out a needy whine and shuffle your hips backwards that he realizes you’ve been waiting so patiently for him.

He snaps his hips against yours, the head of his cock barreling so deep inside of you so quickly that it almost hurts. “Sorry, pretty girl,” he pants, “didn’t mean to make you wait.”

You try to tell him that it’s okay but you’re silenced with another hard thrust. You cry out his name into your arm, your teeth grazing at your skin in your attempt to be quiet. Dick grabs the other side of your waist, using his hands to push and pull you as he pleases.

You fall further against the desk, your body lazily resting against it while Dick’s hips snap into yours repeatedly. The room is filled with the sound of skin on skin, a chorus of your combined moans filling the empty space between thrusts. Each shift of his hips, each prod of his cock, only spurs you further along.

You squeeze your eyes shut, completely focused on his cock battering its way through your walls. You’re only vaguely aware of Dick talking to you, his praise sounding incoherent beneath the rush of blood to your ears. Your pussy flutters around him, his cock scraping your cervix with every thrust.

He thrusts particularly hard into you, his cock jamming hard into the very edge of your walls, forcing a loud cry from you. It aches as much as it pleases, and without thinking, you’re suddenly crawling forward across your desk. Dick tightens his grip on you before you can get very far, tugging you back hard against him and slamming your pussy down on his cock.

You nearly squeal from the pleasure, tears forming in the corners of your eyes. That familiar heat builds inside of you once more, spilling over more and more with each intense thrust.

“You’re taking me so well,” he coos. “So tight—god, it’s like your pussy was made for me. Fuck.”

His lewd words add to that growing knot inside of you and suddenly you’re coming undone in his arms. Everything is too hot, too much, too loud. Tears spill from your eyes and you’re barely aware of the half sobs, half moans you let out through your orgasm.

“That’s right, let it all out. Good girl, cumming around my cock like that.”

Dick holds you steady the whole time you cum, thrusts growing sloppy as your pussy sucks him in and tries to keep him inside of you forever. He’s almost as breathless as you while he watches you cum and the way your pussy seizes around him is enough to have him tumbling over the edge after you.

He wraps both arms around your waist, pulling your hips flush to his, before he lets the both of you fall back into the chair behind him. Your new position forces his cock deeper inside of you—as deep as it can go—and then he’s cumming inside of you.

You can barely feel the hot ropes of cum he spills inside of you while you come down from your own high. Your thighs shake where they rest over his and you’re grateful for him holding you. 

Dick lets his forehead rest in the crook of your neck, his sweaty hair wetting your t-shirt. Even after he’s done cumming, he holds you tightly against him, the two of you panting in sync.

It’s nearly five minutes later when you can finally bring yourself to speak, your hoarse voice evidence of the pounding you’ve just taken. “I take it you saw my browsing history?” are the first words out of your mouth.

Dick laughs, his voice gravelly and deep and sexy. “Yeah,” he says, kissing your cheek. “I did.”

You awkwardly turn in his lap, twitching at the way it adjusts his half-hard cock inside of you. You look up at his eyes, the blue finally starting to seep back in through the dark. He cups your face, his hand sweaty, and pulls you in for another kiss.

When you pull away, you can’t help but ask, “so, what now?”

“First, I think I should show you how to use Incognito Mode.”

masterlist | dc masterlist

if you enjoy content like this, interactions go a long way! i appreciate every like, comment & reblog i get ^^

[bluesidez]

Dad!Miguel drabble for Father's Day!!

content warning: curvy!reader, fem!reader, fluff, a little suggestive so MINORS BEWARE

word count: 697, not proofread (I can write less than 9k...contrary to popular belief)

other dad content ➺ DadBod!Miguel | Dad!Miguel Drabble | DadGymRat!Miguel Drabble | Dad'sBestFriend!Miguel

This can be in the same universe as the Dad Bod fic because I kept the kiddos' names the same, but I didn't describe Mig's body here, so you can imagine it how you would like! :D

Only Miguel would have to come into work on Father's Day of all days.

He woke up with his face snug against your chest and a whisper of the holiday greeting on your lips. It was way too hot to be grasping at each other so early, but that didn't stop him from grinning against your mouth as he held one of your thighs over his body.

A blissful morning of kisses and sweet nothings before the kids woke up was interrupted by the shrill of his work phone that he stupidly forgot to put on silent.

So here he was running back home after fixing a multitude of electric billboards across the city that read "Happy Farter's Day" instead of "Happy Father's Day." Of all of the staff in the company, Miguel wasn't sure why he was chosen to fix it. Maybe he was a father that wanted to have a nice, unbothered farting day.

It was itching close to the afternoon which meant almost a day gone without staring in your face and laughing with his babies. Almost a day gone without hearing the people closest to his heart.

Miguel nearly flew down the highway just to get back home. He wanted to be near his family.

He's never driven into a garage so fast.

"Honey? Mija? Mijo?"

Miguel's lanyard tapped against his button-up as he called out for the three of you. The house was quiet minus the ceiling fans humming in the window-lit rooms.

Had the three of you gone out without him?

Miguel walked through the house listening and looking for any clues as to where you all might be. Right when he was about to call you in a panic, he heard a giggle come from the deck.

Sliding the curtain open, he watched as his babies were running through the backyard, Raul barely keeping up with Gabriella's speed.

"You're back!" Miguel could hear you to the left of him. His breath hitched taking in your figure.

A blue flowy dress frames your curves, thin straps hug your shoulders, and the cut of the neckline accentuates the place where he held his head this morning.

You walk up to him and reach up for a kiss that he happily reciprocates, "Welcome home, baby."

You call the kids to come up and eat. Their little feet scatter to reach Miguel.

He bends down to take them into his arms, a hearty laugh leaving him as he picks them both up in the air. He plants their faces with raspberry kisses, Gabriella squealing while Raul asks for him to do it again and again.

You smile at them, watching as Miguel spun around with the kids holding on tight. The grumpiness that filled Miguel up this morning after that dreaded call poured out of him and was replaced with warmth and happiness.

This is the moment that Miguel was yearning to experience all morning. A day for him and his family.

"C'mon. Go get changed so we can head over to Gabriel's. He said something about a grill and a splash pad?" you slid your hand over his lower back, fingers sliding through the belt loops of his pants.

As you took a tug at one loop, Miguel leaned over and gave your lips a peck, "Gabriel only knows how to work one of those things."

"I guess we have to take a gamble with today's lunch then," you chuckle, taking Raul from Miguel as he sat Gabriella down. "Dinner will be perfect for sure."

"Yeah?" Miguel raised an eyebrow you. Your eyes were full of mirth and something else Miguel couldn't quite place yet. "I can't wait, then."

When Miguel was up in the bedroom, he began to see why that playful glint painted your face.

A small gift back was placed on the bed with a new silk tie and the tag for what he could assume was a pair of panties.

"A matching set for you and I. I wonder what can be done with this tie?

When the mood is right, we'll find out tonight.

A fun way to end your lovely Father's Day."

Dinner would definitely exceed lunch.

As always, like, reblog, and COMMENT! I love to see what you guys have to say! <3

a/n: I hope everyone who deserves it has a Happy Father's Day! I'm talking older siblings who raised their siblings, kids who grew up too fast, single mothers, single fathers, good fathers, and fictional men who will stop the world for their kids! You're doing great. Tomato to deadbeat fathers. You deserve nothing.

taglist: @questionable-behaviour @babygotl01292003 @slushycoookie @calig0sto @ghost-lantern

@tatatida @haveclayeveryday @corpsenightmarebride @samjinxx @earth2fae

@maiyart @Feegrh32 @darkstalight82 @ladysimp @vmpz8sauceee

@Leonsbimbogf @unwrittenletter @maxlinpetersen @madeofstar-dust @leoeloo

@just-simpins-blog @poisamm @thequeenreaders @aly29a2001 @mimi-sanisanidiot

@tojishugetiddies @pigeonmama @av3da @darkstalight82 @prettygirleli

@koikohib @jayskookies

[solaireverie]

lh44 | all eyes on you, my magician

pairing: lewis hamilton x f!merc admin!reader

summary: [ social media au ] lewis has a soft spot for the person behind the mercedes account and is a little obvious about it

warnings: one (1) swear word

faceclaim: maisie peters

author's note: it's been a hot minute (two years) since i've written x reader or social media aus, bear with me :) enjoy!

liked by roscoelovescoco, lewishamilton, yourusername and 704,172 others

tagged: lewishamilton, roscoelovescoco

mercedesamgf1 very important good boy(s) appreciation post ❤️

view comments

roscoelovescoco love's the photos!

liked by mercedesamgf1, yourusername

user all i want to know is who took the first picture 🧐

↪ user same like who got you smiling like that lewis???

yourusername the cutest!! seeing roscoe was truly the highlight of my week

liked by roscoelikescoco, lewishamilton

↪ user lewis whatcha doing in the likes 🤨

↪ user it wasn't just lewis' main he also liked on roscoe's acc 😭 what is going on

↪ user so we're all taking this as yourusername seeing roscoe in person instead of through instagram like the rest of us peasants right?

liked by lewishamilton, georgerussell63, yourusername and 814,283 others

tagged: lewishamilton, georgerussell63

mercedesamgf1 #throwbacktuesday to the spanish gp ⏮

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user lewis is so obviously admin's favorite that it's not even funny at this point 💀

↪ user poor george having to thirdwheel whatever admin and lewis have going on

liked by georgerussell63

↪ user george liked??? lewis and admin what do you have to say for yourself

↪ mercedesamgf1 no comment 😜

user okay now i'm curious who exactly runs the merc account?

↪ yourusername 🤭🤭🤭

liked by yourbestfriend, lewis hamilton, mickschumacher and 234 others

yourusername summer break dump 🌥

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roscoelovescoco we's misses you's!

↪ user we?? we???? roscoe hamilton explain yourself 🎤

↪ yourusername i miss you two too 🫶

↪ user you two???!!! 😳

carmenmmundt don't get attacked by an ostrich xoxo

↪ yourusername i stayed a safe distance away 🫡

↪ carmenmmundt good girl ❤️ proud of you for keeping my darling safe

↪ georgerussell63 ?????????????

liked by lewishamilton

↪ yourusername avert your eyes, georgie boy, avert your eyes

yourusername has added to their story

geotag: monaco

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[woso-dreamzzz]

Illness

Barcelona Femení x Teen!Reader

Summary: You hide an illness

If you weren't delirious with a fever and sweating bullets, you would have described this moment as the most embarrassing moment of your life.

The semi-final El Clásico was one of the most important of the season and it was such bad luck that you had fallen ill the week before. It was most likely the flu but you never went to any doctor to get it checked out. Instead, you hunkered down in your apartment and refused to leave until you got better.

Only, you never did get fully better. Your immune system was as strong as a wall of feathers so you just decided to channel your inner Oscar winner and pretend you were fine.

You arrived at training every day after taking enough painkillers to fell an ox and hydrate yourself to the point that you were sure that your bladder had to force itself to grow.

It paid off though because you were part of the squad going to Madrid and you caught up on sleep during the train ride so could keep up your façade all the way up to the match day.

Your head was pounding as you finally stepped onto the pitch about ten minutes after half time, sliding easily into Lucy's position as the ball went back into play.

Thankfully, football was an instinct rather than a conscious thought at this point and even with a banging headache, achy limbs and a blocked nose, you played without much issue.

"Hey," Irene said as you took a little break from running to walk over to the corner that was being set up," You okay? You're slower than usual today."

You fanned yourself with your jersey. "Just a little hot."

She gave you an odd look. "It isn't that hot. You haven't been on the pitch for long."

You gave her a shrug and lied straight to her face," Really? I guess I'm just running warm today." You picked up the pace and slotted yourself between Athenea and Olga.

It was almost slow motion as Salma sent a cross into the box. Olga tried to push you forward and away while Athenea's elbow stabbed you straight in the eye.

You dropped like a brick backwards into Olga, who surprised by your sudden weight, dropped you on the floor. Your head banged painfully against the grass and you groaned.

There was a slight ringing in your ears but you couldn't focus on anything but the desperate churning of your stomach. You squeezed your eyes tight to try to stem the swirling but it just made stars explode behind your eyelids as your face throbbed from Athenea's elbow.

Your stomach bubbled up and you felt a hand on your shoulder.

"Hey, kid, you okay?" It was Irene and she jostled you slightly.

That was what did it and you rolled over onto your stomach just in time to surrender your dinner.

You burst into tears, sobbing into the grass.

"Holy shit, y/n," Mariona said," You're burning up! Are you sick?"

"You're sick?!"

You continued to cry into the grass. With your usual caretaker (Alexia) out of the team for the rest of the month, it meant Irene was in charge of you.

You couldn't decide if you would rather Alexia at this moment.

"Go away," You cried into the grass.

"Can't do that," Ingrid said as she crouched over you," The medics are coming to get you."

You turned your head to look at her.

"She got you good, huh?" Ingrid said, her fingers ghosting over your swollen eye.

"Ingrid," You croaked out," My head hurts."

"I'm sure. That was a nasty fall."

"Hurt before that too."

She made a sympathetic noise as she helped you sit up for the medics to have a proper look at you.

You were escorted straight off when they checked the dilation of your pupils.

Lucy trailed back with you along with Marta, who looked to already be on the phone with Alexia. You knew your caretaker would be watching the match so it wasn't a surprise that she had already called someone the moment you went down.

"Got quite the shiner there," Lucy commented as she inspected your bruised eye," Trying to look like Mapi?"

"At least it isn't bleeding," You said before descending into a coughing fit, thumping at your chest to try and regain your breath.

Lucy laughed but quietened when Marta held the phone out to you. You tried to ignore the sinking feeling you felt when you saw Alexia's contact picture.

You cleared your throat.

"Hola?"

"I knew it!" Alexia declared.

"Know what?" You tried to play dumb even though your whole body protested.

"When I saw you yesterday and you told me you were back to full health! I knew you were lying to me! You're still sick!"

"Barely." Your defence didn't help when you started coughing again.

"You sound horrible," Alexia said bluntly," You're not playing the final. I'll have you benched."

"I'll be benched anyway. I've got a bruise the size of my fucking country on my eye and a concussion, probably."

"We'll have a talk about hiding illness when you get home," Alexia said," And I'll have to leave a message for your captain."

You would have rolled your eyes if it didn't cause a whole new pain to shoot through your skull. Your nose was all blocked up again so the pressure in your head was only mounting. "You're my captain."

"Your national captain."

"Oh, what? You can't tell Leah! She'll go barmy! I'll be lectured for hours!"

"You're being lectured regardless, by me," Alexia said," Now, rest up, drinks lots and I'll see you in a few days."

You didn't even get the chance to watch the end of the match because Marta forced you back to the hotel and into your room.

"No screens," She said when you moved to turn on the tv.

"Well, what else am I meant to do?" You complained, blowing out your nose.

"Well, for one, you can use the bucket on the floor if you feel like you're going to be sick."

"I'm not going to throw up."

"You threw up on the pitch." Marta just had to remind you of the most embarrassing moment of your life and your cheeks flushed red out of embarrassment now instead of your fever.

"But I won't now."

Marta didn't get time to respond because the door to your room got thrown open and Patri sprawled herself next to you on the bed.

"Welcome back to the land of the living," She teased, dumping some chocolate onto your lap.

"Patri," Marta groaned," She's sick and injured. She needs rest."

"She needs company. She's still human. You can't just lock her in her room like she's Rapunzel."

Marta rolled her eyes and swatted at Patri. "She doesn't need you hindering her recovery. Go on, out with you."

"Nah," Patri said as she got comfortable," I think I'll stay here. Besides, y/n wants me to stay."

You sent Marta your most pathetic and sad look.

"Please, Marta?" You begged," I promise she'll help me. It'll be nice to have some company."

Marta sighed deeply. "Fine but just for now. This all might change by the time Alexia gets her."

You groaned and flopped back to lay against your pillows properly. "Don't remind me."

[melanieph321]

You and Jude met a few days before going to SGP for international duty in a club or something.

You guys click right away and there’s so much chemistry and you end up spending the whoooooole night together, you have breakfast in bed the morning after and off he goes to SGP. You start texting and there’s more attraction between you two and he keep saying that he can’t stop thinking about you and it’s the same for you.

He invites you to the first friendly with Brazil and you don’t know if it’s appropriate going as families and partners will be there and ofc his parents.

You end up going and he introduces you as his friend but most of the guys know each one of his friends and they had never heard of you so they know there’s more, same for his parents as they catch you talking deep and they notice his soft look for you.

This is so good! 😭

SEVEN DAYS OF REQUESTS (DAY 4)

Jude Bellingham x Reader - Capture Me Part 1/2

Part 2

Enjoy!

You had always been passionate about photography, and as a photography student, you were always on the lookout for opportunities to hone your skills and earn some extra money. So when your teacher asked you to help her out with a shoot, you did not hesitate to take the job. However, when she gave you the adress to where the shoot would be happening, you had to read the text message twice, one time out loud,  just to make sure that you hadn't gotten it wrong.

"Wembley Stadium?" You frowned. "What the fuck am I doing at Wembley Stadium?"

Turns out that your teacher had a life outside of teaching university kids how to adjust their lenses. Apparently she owned her own model agency that specialized in Sports photography, hence today's job - shooting England's national men's football team ahead of their fixture against Brazil.

You were a bit nervous at first. You had never photographed for a sporting event before. Thankfully your teacher put you on portrait duty whilst she took care of capturing the players in action. It turned out to be a really fun shoot. One of the best gigs you've ever gotten. The football players were a fun and energetic bunch, and they were eager to show off their skills and personalities to your camera. Some of them were constantly moving around, striking poses even though you didn't ask them to. It was helpful at times but not always.

Despite the chaos, the football players were incredibly friendly and curious about you and your job. You found yourself laughing and joking with the players, all of them except for one.

"Is this gonna take all day, or what?" Said Jude Bellingham. He was called in to stand behind your camera but seemed a bit on the edge to.

"Just chill out, Jude, she'll just be a minute." Said one of his teamsmates, telling him off. Jude took it as a joke, though. "Yeah, but you lot get to go to lunch already whilst I'm still stuck here."

You had just gotten to readjusting the lighting but was immediately struck by his confidence and charisma. However, you were determined to focus on your work rather than letting his cocky demeanor distract you.

You snapped a shot.

"Hey?"

Jude had his eyes closed in that one so you snapped another shot.

"Hey, I wasn't ready."

You snapped another shot. And another.

"For fuck sakes...Now I know you're joking with me."

You ignored him, eyes narrowed at your laptop screen.

"Fascinating." You muttered.

Jude frowned.  "What is?" 

Looking at your computer screen you couldn't help but notice the way the light reflected off his muscles and the way Judes smile lit up his entire face.

"Is something wrong?"

You looked up. Jude was looking at you with a bit of concern in his eyes. Heat rose to your face. "No. Of course not."

"Oh. Okay." He nodded. "So am I done?"

"No."

"No?"

"No. It's just..." You were blushing now. Blushing like a fool. "I meant to say that you are really photogenic."

"And what does that mean. That I'm hot?"

"No, and yes." You laughed, avoiding snorting like a pig. "I guess you can say that you're photos are good looking, but it's more about the fact that you are totally made to be behind the camera." You said, cringing internally.

"Aren't you the one behind the camera?" Jude smirked.

You shook your head. A sign to hold back on the compliments towards a guy who probably gets them everyday.

"But you are." He said, still with his eyes curiously checking you out.

"I am what?"

"Technically you are the one behind the camera not me."

You sighed. "Yes, maybe I am."

He smiled, having proven his point.

It was a sweet moment. A brief moment that you share with Jude, where the two of you were shyly glancing at each other, not really saying anything. Nevertheless, the shoot continued with Jude posing behind the camera, showing of the men's football kit for this year.

Despite his initial arrogance, Jude turned out to be a lot of fun to work with, and you found yourself enjoying the shoot more than you expected. Perhaps that's what led you to take up his offer when he asked....

"So are you having lunch with us or...?"

"Um...I don't know?" You said, not sure if your teacher mentioned that lunch would be included today.

"Come on." Jude waved. "I'm sure the guys can spare you a sausage."

"Thanks Jude, that's really sweet of you." But you had yet packed away all of your photography tools. They were supposed to be loaded onto your teachers van and taken back to her agency. "I don't think I'm gonna make it to lunch, I still have a job to do."

"Okay." He said, crossing his arms as he leaned against the door frame. "If not lunch, how about dinner?"

"Pardon?"

He smiled at your reaction. "I'm asking you to dinner. Are you free tonight?"

You frowned. "Do you even know my name?"

"Do I have to?"

You rolled your eyes.

"Fine." He sighed. "I'm Jude Bellingham, what's your name?" He offered you a hand.

You took it and shook it firmly. "It's Y/N."

His eyes widened in suprise, a slight twitch in the corner of his lips. "Hello Y/N, are you free to go out to dinner with me tonight?"

"No."

"Oh, come on."

You laughed. "Fine. But nothing fancy."

"Why not?" He frowned.

"Why not? Don't people follow you with cameras everywhere you go? I don't want to be a part of that."

"Too bad." He shrugged. "I've been told that that I'm very photogenic."

"Shut up." You laughed and shoved him out of the room, shouting: "I'll leave my number with the people at the ticket outlet!"

"Alright, talk to you later Y/N."

"Bye, Jude."

Part 2

[ahgasegotarmy116]

Feral | JJK One Shot

Summary: Jungkook comes back from his Global Citizen Festival and tells you something funny that happened to him. Pairing: Jungkook x f!Reader | Established Relationship, idol!au Word Count: 2.5k~ Warnings: Explicit language and mature themes, mentions of bdsm, sub space and pet play A/N: Hey guys this is my first One Shot that I've uploaded to Tumblr and I'm scared but excited to see what you think. My asks and DMs are open if you have any feedback or just wanna say hi! A big thank you to @trina864 for helping me and encouraging me to start posting on here. Hopefully I'll be coming back with more fics very soon! P.s. Horribly edited so please excuse any errors

"Did you get to watch my performance tonight?" Jungkook asks, bright eyed and bushy tailed walking into our hotel room. I look at him with a pained expression "I'm sorry baby I really wanted to but I had an early morning meeting to talk about this big case we've been working on" I explain apologetically. "Oh" he deflates, sad that I wasn't watching. "That's okay, I know how hard you've been working lately, I understand" he says nodding his head, coming over to the bed to sit next to me and see what I'm working on. He acknowledges all the sleepless nights I've been having, and no matter how much he tries to get me to come to bed, I never listen. Most early mornings he finds me sleeping on my desk having passed out from exhaustion and he picks me up and brings me to bed to get at least a few comfortable hours of rest. 

"You wanna know something funny that happened today?" he says with a toothy grin. I hum in acknowledgement and close my laptop taking a break to give him my full undivided attention. "After one of my songs today I took my inner ear out because I could hear Army chanting something and I wanted to try to understand but I couldn't. So I asked them to do it a bit louder and I guess they were barking at me. Like 'woof woof woof woof'. It happened to me before when I was on Good Morning America and I wasn't really sure what it meant but it looked like they were having fun so I think that would mean it's a good thing right?" he says with an amused expression. "Yes Jungkook it's a good thing" I say giggling at his confusion. "So what does that mean when they bark at me?" he says looking at me and tilting his head at me just like Bam does to him. 

I take a few seconds to think about it but for the life of me I can't really seem to put it into words without making it even more confusing for myself. "Um, well I guess the basic thing that it means if they think you're really hot, like beyond hot" I start. "So sexy?" he says encouraging me to continue. "Yeah pretty much and have you ever really heard the expression of 'going wild' over something?" I ask. "Yeah?" he says dragging it out starting to understand the action a little bit more but still showing some confusion. "Well it's pretty much based on that among other things. Another thing people say is 'going feral' with is like beyond going crazy like when dogs are like foaming at the mouth" I say brining up an extreme example trying to help him get the picture. "You mean like when they have rabies?" he says now thoroughly amused. "I mean kinda but not really" I say tilting my head from from side to side a few times.

"One more thing I could think to link it to would be something a little on... well a little on the explicit side" I say cringing at having to explain this one. "Explicit? Army? Noooo!" he says laughing knowing damn well he has been showing a more explicit side of himself lately, amused that Army is following suit. "You're familiar with some basic concepts of bdsm right?" I say feeling a bit awkward bringing it up. "Well... yeah we've kind dabbled in it a little bit right?" he says with a smirk and poking my side" I flinch a bit at it and laugh nervously "Yeah but anyways, have you heard about pet play?" I ask hoping that I won't have to explain it too much. He tilts his his head up towards the ceiling in thought trying to remember if he's heard anything about it but comes up empty handed. "Mmm can't say that I have" he says and waits expectantly for my continued explanation. 

"Basically it kind of links to a degradation kink, you know when a person gets aroused by getting humiliated. You know, stuff like that" he nods his head showing me he's trying to follow. "So they are saying, well not all of them but I'm sure some of them are thinking this. But they are saying that they want you to degrade them and put a leash on them and treat them like they’re your pet and you can do as you please with them" I say cringing at the fact that I have to have to have this sort of conversation to begin with. "Uh huh" he says feeling slightly uncomfortable but still rather amused. "I mean you're hot so I'm not surprised that people are ready to submit to you like that. "Like you do" he says now dropping his voice an octave, making me shudder. "We're not talking about me right now" I say laughing it off, getting off the bed and putting some distance between us. Jungkook swings his legs over the edge of the bed and stares at me with a hunger in his eyes that had not been there moments ago. 

"Well why not? We're already on the subject, why not continue?" he says leaning his arms back on the bed and spreading his legs. "Because we're talking about your fans, you know Army?" I say continuing to back away from him until I hit a wall. "I don't want to talk about Army anymore, I spent some time with them today so now I want to spend some time with you" he says purposely toying with me, pushing all the right buttons. I let out a slight whimper not knowing how else to respond. "It's been a while since we tried something new hasn't it?" he says sitting up a bit. "Would you like to be my pet? Let me do whatever I want with you? I already know you like it when I call you names. What has been your favorite one recently? Slut? Whore? Bitch?" I whimper again while squeezing my thighs together. "Ah that's right, how fitting, would you like it if I put a leash on you, and let everyone see what a dirty little bitch you are for me? Make you crawl to me? I might even make you drink out of a bowl like the pretty little bitch you are. But wait that might be something you would enjoy. Would you like that pup?" he says waiting for my answer. 

I start to respond but he holds his hand up cutting me off. "Aww look at that, my dumb pup forgot that dogs don't talk. Now try again love, bark once for yes and twice for no" I squirm in place not sure exactly how to respond since the thought of it does intrigue me and I can't lie when I say that I can feel myself getting wet. He raises his brow at me waiting for me to respond and I finally decide to let out one little bark under my breath while hanging my head in shame. "I'm sorry pup what was that? I couldn't quite hear you?" I let out another bark in response now feeling my cheeks starting to heat up. "One more time for me, just a little bit louder. Do you want to be my dumb little pup? My bitch? Poor baby has made up her mind but is too embarrassed to bark. Come on, just a little louder. "Woof" I finally respond loud and clear this time, hoping he won't make me do it again. 

"Aw there we go. Looks like you aren't the dumb little bitch I thought you were. Puppy was just too shy to admit she wants me to play with her". I breathe out hoping he'll stop there but he decides to continue. "On all fours, now" he orders. This I can do, and I've done it multiple times without question when he has me in this sub space that I've been tipped over in. "Good girl" he says with a tone of voice he reserves for when he talks to Bam. For not knowing what this is he seems like quite the natural. "Baby come" he says ordering me to come to his side. I wince at the thought of me crawling over to him and he notices my hesitance, "Aw looks like my dumb little bitch still needs training. Puppy come here" he says in a more playful tone. I decide to surrender this time and crawl over to him and see his eyes rake over my body with a expression that I have never seen before but it makes me feel nervous but sexy. Once I sit in front of him I see him play with his lip rings and then rest on biting his lip for a second just gazing down on me. 

"You did so well love" he says cupping my face in his hand and rubbing his thumb over the apple of my cheek praising me for all that I've done. "You can come out if you want to" he says gently, coaxing me out of my sub space. I blink a few times and reach up to place my hand on top of his and he gives me soft smile, "There she is" he says and he looks down at me lovingly, "Looks like you really enjoyed that" he says helping me stand up. "You're one to talk" I say rubbing my aching knees that I only now just noticed. "Speaking of which you seemed like you're quite a natural for someone who isn't familiar with pet play" I say suspiciously. "Yeah about that..." he says trailing off. "Jeon Jungkook did you lie to me?" I say feeling utterly betrayed. "I'm sorry but you just looked super shy I just had to watch you explain it to me" he says pulling me onto his lap. I burry my face in the crook of his neck to hide my reddening face. 

"You're so mean"I mumble, "Aw come on you know I love you, plus look at you, you're my adorable little pup who listened so well" he says rubbing my back. I sit up and look at him, "But I thought I was your bitch" I say with a roll of my eyes. "That too, but you're my cute puppy first and foremost" he says ruffling my hair. "Hey! Don't do that!" I whine fixing it, "We're not playing like that anymore". "Alright alright, I'll stop. We can pick this up later" he says giving me a quick kiss on my cheek and placing me on the bed walking over to his bag on the floor. "Huh" I scoff, "What makes you think I wanna do that again?" I say crossing my arms over my chest. "Do I really need to see how much of a mess you've made down there right now?" my eyes widen at his words and I cross my legs in response. "Exactly" he laughs pulling out his laptop and his phone, walking over to the small couch in the corner. 

"What are you doing?" I ask curiously watching him prop up his phone. "I'm gonna go on live for a bit to check up on Army to see their reaction, especially since I dropped the teaser for 3D" he says with a smile. "You dropped it at the festival? Wow I can imagine the screams, especially after seeing their reaction to the proof teaser at your last concert in the US" I say shaking my head and smiling at the thought. "Yeah I'm even more excited to release it now!" he says feeling proud of himself. "You and Jack worked really hard on it so I'm sure they're gonna love it. Let's be real, if you just recoded a whole three minutes worth of you just breathing everyone would go crazy over it. That's basically what Hobi did in Jack in the Box right?" I finish laughing. He let's out a chuckle in response, "Yeah you're right, I'm sure it's gonna be great! Are you gonna go shower?" He asks watching me grab some stuff out of my bag. "Yeah I definitely need one, my back is killing me after having to sit in front of my computer all night. 

"Okay wait for me and I'll join you in a bit yeah?" he says with a sly smile. "You better hurry up then mister, I'm not taking a three hour shower because you're still on live" I say remembering the nights he would stay up talking to and spending time with Army. "Okay just give me like 15 minutes" he begs. I laugh and start to walk over to the bathroom but he calls out to me. "Wait!" I turn around at the sound of him, "Can I have a kiss?" he says with a pout, to which I can't help but agree to. I give him a kiss and he deepens it and he promises between kisses that he'll give me a massage to entice me into really waiting for him. I nod my head and roll my eyes and turn to walk to bathroom to which he responds with a loud slap on my ass. "Hey!" I yell back scolding him, but he puts up his finger to his lips as he presses the button to go live telling me to stay quiet. I huff silently and close the door behind me and start the shower and hear him make excuses for the noise.

"Oh I think it's just the sound of someone taking a shower next door. Yeah it's loud huh? I guess the walls are pretty thin here. Oh! Jin! Jin Hyung!" I hear him continue, sounding excited at what I could only think is the sight of Jin commenting on the live. Smiling I get into the shower and let the warm water wash away all the stress from the day until I hear a slight jiggle of the door nob. "Ya! Woman open the door!" I laugh at his pleading and leave him there complaining for a while before letting him in. "Oops" I say "I guess I forgot" I finish, feigning innocence. "Uh huh, you forgot" he says rolling his eyes at me and giving me another slap on the ass. "Just get back in the shower" he says and I give him a kiss before doing just that. 'Tonight is gonna be a long night' I think to myself as I bite my lip standing under the stream of water, waiting for him to join me.

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[maddiethedogstories]

Too Big For His Britches

I've been teasing @pinkducttape a little too much lately. As a self-imposed punishment (the joy of being a switch is that I get to be my own Dom) I wrote this horrible story staring myself, my imaginary Mommy, @pinkducttape, and their awesome Daddy, Midnight. Enjoy my attonement, I guess?

Today, I was feeling BIG! Mommy, my wife, had been so proud of me using the potty and staying accident free for the last week that she decided it was finally time for me to graduate from pull-ups to big kid undies!

Should have I felt embarrassed that, as a 32-year-old man, being allowed to wear a pair of Spider-Man underwear by my wife felt like a massive victory? Probably.

Did I? No.

The feeling of the soft cotton underwear under the jean shorts Mommy had dressed me in was far superior to the warm, bulky feel of the training pants and diapers I was now, much to used to. How could I not feel happy with my new found freedom?

Adding to my excitement was that today, the day I had graduated from 'Little' to 'Middle,' Mommy was taking me on a playdate! I was going to get to go hang out with Sunset, one of my best friends, while Mommy hung out with their Daddy, Midnight. I just knew that Little Sunsie was going to still be waddling around in diapers, while I would get to show off just how much of a big kid I was to them. It was going to be great!

It didn't take long for us to get to the secluded park where Mommy always took me for my playdates. I sat in the backseat, idly sucking my thumb while I thought about how I was going to tease my friend for still being a stinky little, while I, on the other hand, was a much more mature big kid. My wandering thoughts were interrupted by Mommy's voice.

"Baby Bean, are you drinking your water like you're supposed to be? It's going to be hot out there, and I don't want you getting dehydrated!"

I groaned as I popped my thumb out of my mouth and reached for my Bluey-themed water bottle in the cup holder. Didn't Mommy know I was a big kid? She's the one who held out my big kid undies for me to step into this morning for goose's sake! I didn't need to be reminded to drink water like some silly little baby. But, talking back wasn't worth the fight, not on a day like today. Plus, Mommy was right, as usual. It was really hot outside, and I was feeling thirsty just sitting in the car. There wasn't any harm in doing what she asked, just this one time. Having made up my mind, I replaced my thumb with the nipple of my water bottle and sucked down its contents as we drew closer to the park.

As usual, when we got to our destination, there was only one other car in the parking lot. Mommy and I both recognized it immediately. The pink and rainbow duct tape decorating it was a dead giveaway.

"Look, Baby Bean! Sunsie and Midnight are already here," Mommy said as she parked the car next to our friends' vehicle. She then turned back to me, staring at me sternly, "Now, I know you've earned the right to be a big boy today, but that does not mean you get to be rude. Make sure to be nice to Sunsie. They can't help being an adorable little pamper packer. Also, do not forget to come and tell me when you need me to take you to the potty. Got it?"

I nodded my head up and down in affirmation, happy that my Bluey water bottle hid the blush forming on my cheeks from the mention of asking Mommy to take me to the potty. And, when I nodded my head, agreeing to be nice to Sunset and ask to use the potty, I really meant it. Just because I was planning on teasing Baby Sunsie just a little, didn't mean I wasn't going to be nice to them!

I waited patiently as Mommy walked around the back of the car, opened the door and unbuckled my seat belt. Immediately, I sprinted past Mommy towards the mostly abandoned playground where I knew Sunset would be playing.

"Suuuuunnnnnssssssiiiiiiieeeeeee! We're here!" I yelled exhuberantly as I spotted my friend, sitting in the sandbox in a pastel yellow t-shirt and a pair of jean shortalls that did little to hide the thick diaper bulging at their waist. I was so excited, I didn't notice the pressure building in my bladder as I greeted my friend with a big, uncoordinated hug.

Midnight watched, smiling from their perch on a nearby park bench as I tackled Sunset into the sand in my excitement. From a distance behind me, I could hear my Mommy yelling out with an exasperated tone.

"Maddie! Careful! Don't hurt poor, little Sunsie!" She yelled breathlessly as she ran up behind me.

Sunset, for their part, was overjoyed to see me. They giggled as I wrapped my arms around them and accidentally knocked them over.

Midnight, with a better vantage of what was going on, immediately replied to my Mommy, "Oh, don't worry! It's just kids being kids! Now, get over here! We've got some catching up to do!"

The adults faded out of my awareness as Sunset and I righted ourselves, giggling in the sandbox. Sunset had clearly come prepared to play with all of their toys. Trucks, blocks, dolls, dinosaurs, and tractors were strewn about the sandy landscape my friend had constructed.

"Sunset, Sunset! Guess what?!" I asked, my excitement overflowing.

Sunset rolled their eyes at my bubbliness, but grinned good-naturedly at my excitement. "What 'Baby Bean?'" they asked, teasing me with my Mommy's nickname for me.

"That's just it!" I responded, ignoring the barb, "I'm not a baby anymore! Look! Mommy's letting me wear undies!"

I pulled down the elastic waist band of my jean shorts revealing the front of the cotton Spider-Man underwear I was wearing. Sunset's eyes grew wide. A grin spread across my face as I saw the hints of both jealousy and admiration I was hoping see in my friend's demeanor.

"That's right," I said, letting the elastic waistband of my shorts snap back into place, "no more diapers, or pull-ups, or training potties! I'm a real big boy now! I bet your Daddy will even let me babysit your stinky bottom soon!" I stuck my tongue out to emphasize my point.

As I spoke, I started to squirm uncomfortably. I felt a mounting pressure in my bladder, but it wasn't anything urgent enough to deal with yet. I couldn't leave to go potty now, just as I was starting to rub my new status in my friend's face.

"Yep, I bet it'll only be a couple weeks before I'm holding your leash, droppin' you off at daycare, before I get to go back to my REAL job!" I continued to tease Sunset. I couldn't tell if their face was getting red out of embarrassment or anger, but, frankly, high on my own increased status, I didn't care.

"Stop it, Maddie! It's cool you get to wear undies and all, but you're still just a baby like me! Nobody's gonna let you be a babysitter! You're not 'sponsible enough!" Sunset spat out unconvincingly, a hint of concern that their friend of once equal status could turn into yet another caregiver.

"Oh, Sunsie," I said, trying my best to imitate the condescending tone my Mommy used with me when I got high and mighty, "I'm not a baby like you though! Look at me, sitting in my big kid underwear. And look at you, I bet your diapers so soggy you're about to leak."

I extended one hand over to Subset's diapered crotch and squeezed it for emphasis. Too my utter delight, it was thoroughly soaked. Sunset, suddenly aware of the disastrous state of their diaper, turned bright red at my touch and tried to back away but only succeeded at falling on their back in the sand again.

"Aw! Did Little Sunsie fall down and go boom? Does the little baby in their soggy diaper not like being checked? Is it cause you want to keep playing in it like an icky little toddler? Is that why you don't wanna potty train and be a big kid like me?" I hovered over Sunset as I teased them, loving every second of watching their skin turn as red as a tomato out of fear, rage, and shame.

As I teased, Sunset couldn't even get a word out from where they lay in the sandbox. "I… No… Not… Baby… Gah… Big Kid… Diap…." Sunset's sputtering then suddenly stopped, and a big grin spread across their face. Unfortunately, I didn't notice it.

"Aw, is the little baby too little to talk! That's ok! Maybe I can go get your paci from your Daddy. Babies who waddle around in soggy pants like you shouldn't be talking like a big kid like me anyway!"

I couldn't stop. I was channeling all of the repressed anger and shame I had bottled up over the last few years as Mommy's perfect little pamper-packing, stuffy-humper. I was ready to throw every insult and taunt I had ever heard at Sunset, my friend, just so I could feel bigger and more powerful than someone else. I was becoming a monster in superhero underoos.

Luckily for me and my friendship with Sunsie, my reign of terror was cut short. From behind me, a familiar voice spoke.

"Beanie Baby! I did not just catch you bullying sweet little Sunsie. Come with me!"

As Mommy grabbed me by the ear, yanking me away, Sunset started laughing maniacally as they laid in the sand, excited to watch Mommy deliver whatever diabolical punishment I had earned.

I whined as Mommy dragged me across the park by my ear. "Owie! Mommy! This hurts! I didn't do nothing! I just said the truth."

"Madison James! I don't want to hear it. I heard what you were telling poor Baby Sunsie over there, and it was not acceptable!" Mommy lectured as she pulled me.

My bladder was starting to ache. The nervousness and fear of my punishment only adding to my desperation. I decided to change tack.

"Mommy! I hafta go potty!" I wailed, hoping my growing desperation to pee could distract my wife from my punishment.

It didn't.

"Well, if you're as big a kid as you were telling Sunset over there, you should have no problem holding it while you're being punished."

A new panic struck me as I suddenly realized that I might not be able to do that. I didn't want to go back to pull-ups, let alone diapers like Sunset because I had an accident while in time out!

I struggled uselessly against the grip Mommy had on my ear as she dragged me to the tree nearest to the playground.

"Nose to the tree. Now!" Mommy said as we reached our destination.

Rubbing my sore ear, I did as I was told, feeling the rough bark scrape against the tip of my nose.

"You have more than earned yourself a time out little one! Bullying poor Sunsie! In front of their Daddy! Do you know how embarrassed I am of you, Little Man? Do you know how bad you made me look as a Mommy and a wife?"

A tear rolled down my cheek as my wife explained how my actions made her feel. How could I have been so careless and thoughtless to not think about how my actions reflected on her? Midnight was one of her best friends, and I had embarrassed her in front of them. Maybe I was nothing more than the thoughtless child she thought of me as.

Mommy saw my tears and, instead of comforting me, leaned into my suffering.

"That's right baby, you embarrassed Mommy. You made Mommy look bad. You made Mommy look like she can't control you. I want you to think about that while you stand here for the next, oh, let's say, 30 minutes."

"30 minutes…" I tried to protest, but before I could say more, a pacifier was shoved in my mouth.

"No talking during time out. That stays in. And yes, 30 minutes," Mommy said sternly.

I grumbled behind my pacifier as I silently calculated whether I could actually keep from wetting myself for that long. Before I could come up with a plan to both stay put and dry, my thoughts were interrupted by the familiar feeling of my shorts being pulled down to my ankles.

"Oh, and since you were so proud of these undies, mister," my wife said from behind me, "I think it's only fair you get to show them off for your whole time out."

I was glad my face was towards the tree as a deep red blush bloomed across my cheeks. I could perfectly picture my cotton clad ass on display, the red, white, and blue picture of a web that made the undies look so cool and big kid in the store, making me look so childish while standing in time out.

Making matters worse, only moments after my undies were put on display, I heard Midnight's soft giggle behind me.

"Aw! Aren't those precious?" They said condescendingly.

I fresh wave of embarrassment passed through me at those words. However, I closed my eyes, bit down hard on my paci, and settled in to survive the next 30 minutes as best I could. The pressure from my bladder was only getting stronger, but I was determined to keep my underwear dry. I was a big boy, after all, really, nearly an adult again.

After 15 minutes, my determination not to wet myself had waned drastically. With my nose still pressed to the trunk of the tree, I shifted my weight from leg to leg, only able to do a pathetic little potty shuffle rather than a full on potty dance with my shorts still wrapped around my ankles.

The sound of a crinkling diaper announced Sunset's approach. Unable to turn to look at them, I could only imagine the satisfied smirk that I was sure was plastered to their face.

"Oh no! Does the BIG boy need to go potty? You better show the poor, little baby how to keep your undies dry! You wouldn't wanna have an accident in front a little kid like me!" Sunset taunted as they toddled closer to me.

I groaned behind my pacifier, not willing to risk the consequences of talking during time out. However, although I desperately wanted to yell at my friend to go away, I knew I deserved every insult they flung at me.

It only took moments for my friend's face to appear in the corner of my vision.

"Oh no, can Big Bad Maddie not talk right now because he's sucking on his paci? I thought paci's were for babies, not big kids?"

I groaned again, the sound muffled by the shield of the pacifier as I shuffled from foot to foot in discomfort again. The pressure in my bladder was so bad I could barely focus on Sunset's words.

"Oh no! You aren't doing a potty dance, are you Baby Bean? I bet you wish you were wearing a diaper right now! You could just let go," Sunset said before there expression changed as an idea hit them, "I mean, I gotta go potty too, and I can just go right now! Listen!"

With that, Sunset smiled, scrunched up their face and let loose. The sound of soft hissing as their urine hit their diaper filled my ears. The sound was too much. I couldn't hold it anymore. Tears started to well in my eyes as I felt a warm wet stream of pee release into my once pristine Spider-Man undies, only to immediately become warm, disgusting rivers of urine, running down my thighs.

As I felt my pee run down my legs into my shoes, I also could feel my chances of becoming a big kid again drift away too. I began to bawl behind my pacifier, not just because I was ashamed of my accident, but also because I was upset at myself for the bratty behavior that got me here.

"Oh, Baby Bean! Did you piddle in your cute Lil' Spider-Man undies? Spider-Man looks sad! He's not Aquaman. He doesn't like getting all wet," Sunset teased. Their words stung more because I knew they were in a soggy situation of their own that was somehow more babyish, but also less embarrassing. "Daddy! Maddie's Mommy! Maddie has an accident!"

My fear overwhelmed my sorrow as I heard Mommy and Midnight walk up behind me.

"What was that sweet, little Sunsie?" Mommy asked my friend turned temporary nemesis.

"Baby Bean wet his undies! Go look!" Sunset responded with more excitement than I really thought was necessary.

A soft, familiar hand grabbed my shoulder, gently inviting me to turn around. I didn't want to. Maybe, if I just stayed here for a while, my undies would dry and no one would be the wiser. It was hot out, after all.

Mommy wasn't going to let me live out my delusion though. "Turn around sweetie, let's see the damage."

Her instruction and a more forceful pull got me to turn around. A dark stain covered the entire front of my underwear. The streams of urine running down my leg were far too obvious. And, even the shorts and socks at my ankles were stained from my shameful accident. I wanted to cry as Mommy forced me to hold me arms up, beant over, and tugged disappointedly on my soaked Spider-Man undies as she inspected them.

"Beanie Baby, you destroyed these poor undies! And your shorts, socks, and shoes? I thought you were a big boy?" My wife chastised me as she pulled and picked at my soaked clothing. "You were doing so good I didn't even bring a change!"

I looked up to see Midnight given Sunset a similar inspection, albeit with much less disappointment in their demeanor.

"Looks like Little Mads isn't the only super soaker here, Sunsie's diaper is pretty wet too," Midnight said as they completed their inspection, "Did you say you didn't bring a change? I've got plenty of extra diapers in my bag and maybe some spare tights. Why don't we change these little stinkers together?"

"Midnight, you are a lifesaver! Are you sure you can spare a diaper? I know how many Sunsie goes through!" Mommy responded, causing Sunset to blush for once.

"I sure do! Sunsie can be quite the pamper packer sometimes, but if my Little Sunset needs to sit in their mess for a bit, they'll survive," Midnight answered.

As Mommy and Midnight talked about diapering me with Sunset, my outrage started to grow. I just had one accident! And I warned Mommy that I needed to go! She was the one that made me stand with my nose to the tree! I shouldn't be put back in diapers! Maybe a pull-up or training pants, but a diaper was too far. I opened my mouth to tell Mommy as much.

"Mommy, this…" That was as far as I made it before my wife shot a hostile glare towards me.

"No! I will not hear a word out of you, Madison James. I trusted you to be big. I trusted you to be kind. I trusted you to keep your pants dry. Obviously, I cannot trust you. You will be going back to diapers. I will not tolerate any grief. Otherwise, I will throw you over my lap and show you just how little you are, understood?"

My stomach dropped to my toes. I hadn't been lectured like that for years. Not stupid enough to risk my Mommy's wraith, I nodded my head and responded, "Yeth, Mama." I kept suckling the pacifier, now happy it was in my mouth for the comfort it provided.

Mommy helped me take off my wet clothes before taking my hand at the same time that Midnight took Sunset's. We were both led back to the bench where our two caregivers had been chatting earlier. Sunset waddled in their soggy diaper as I walked normally, save for being completely naked below the waist. Once at the bench, Midnight quickly pulled out a large blanket laid it on the grass.

"Alright little ones, lie down," Mommy said, directing Sunset and I to lay down next to each other to be changed like the small children we were being treated as, something we'd done together hundreds of times before.

We both quickly complied with my wife's gentle command as Midnight dug through their diaper bag, getting out changing supplies for two infantilized adults.

"Um, Maddie's Mommy?" Sunset asked as we waited on our backs.

"Yes, sweetheart?" Mommy answered.

"Do you think I could get your phone and watch a show while I got changed? I've been good and haven't had any screen time all day!" Sunset begged.

From across the nearby bench, Midnight called out, "Don't give it to them! It's my fault, really, but we're really trying to break little Sunsie's screen addiction."

Sunset pouted as Mommy smiled down at them. It didn't take long for Midnight to join us with two diapers in hand.

"Let's get these babies back to clean and dry!" Midnight announced as they knelt down and began unsnapping the buttons of Sunset's shortalls.

With expert hands, Mommy and Midnight changed me and Sunset. Where normally, Sunset and I would joke and giggle as we got changed together, today, with my fall from grace, I couldn't bring myself to even make eye contact with my friend as my wife wiped my butt and other delicate bits.

Mommy and Midnight had us both changed and back up quickly. Once I was standing in nothing but a T-shirt and a diaper in the grass, Mommy pulled me to the side.

"Maddie, your behavior today has been unacceptable. Clearly, you are not ready for the level of responsibility that I thought you were. Thinking you were was my fault. So, now, until you prove me otherwise, I am demoting you back to diapers, but know that that is based on my mistake, not yours," Mommy began.

"That said," Mommy continued, "You messed up too. I warned you to be nice. I warned you to keep your pants dry. You didn't. Sunset is your friend, and you bullied them. That is not okay."

"I am not going to make you finish your time out. I don't think you would learn anything from it," Mommy lectured, "But I do need you to do one more thing before you can go back to playing. I need you to apologize to Midnight for bullying her precious little one, and I need you to apologize to Sunset for being a bad friend. Can you do that for me?"

Looking down past the bulging diaper around my waist to my bare feet, I let myself feel shame for my behavior yet again. "Yeth, Mommy," I answered, the pacifier still stuck between my lips.

With that, I waddled off to do as Mommy asked. The bulk of the diaper between my legs felt both foreign after the months of training pants and underwear, but, at the same time, frustratingly familiar.

I approached Midnight first, feeling my apology to them would be easier. I popped my pacifier out of my mouth so my apology would sound more sincere.

"Um, Sunset's Daddy? I, um, am sorry for bullying Sunsie," I said timidly.

Midnight looked at me with gentle, but stern eyes.

"Thank you for apologizing, buddy, but it's not me who you need to apologize to, is it?"

I shook my head up and down. "No, it's not."

"Who should you apologize to, baby?" Midnight asked.

"Sunset," I responded meekly, avoid eye contact with my friend's daddy.

"Yes, Little One," they said softly, "But who else?"

I looked up at Midnight, confused. Who else was there to apologize to?

Midnight smiled knowingly, then looked pointedly over my shoulder. I turned and saw Mommy picking up our make-shift changing station.

"Was how you acted nice to your Mommy?" Midnight asked.

I looked down at my feet in shame again. "No, it wasn't. I probably owe her an apology too, huh?" I answered.

"What a smart boy! Maybe you'll get another chance at undies again, yet? I don't know if I can say the same about my Sunsie," Midnight said, turning to look at Sunset for the first time since we began talking and catching them digging through their diaper bag. "Hey! Get out of there! Go play! I didn't pack your tabbie and Daddy's phone is in my pocket! No screen time!"

As Sunset ran off chastened, I followed, wanting to apologize to my friend both because I was ordered to and because it was the right thing to do.

"Sunsie," I said as we reached to sandbox again, "I'm sorry I was mean to you. Can we still be friends?"

Sunset turned to me with their trademark bright and friendly smile. "Thanks for saying sorry, Mads! And, of course we're still friends! Who else is going to put up with my smelly butt and listen to me complain about being put in my crib early?"

Sunset followed up their statement with a big, warm hug.

"Now, let's play!" Sunset said.

I had to disappoint Sunset one more time today, though. "Sorry, Sunsie, I'll come play in a sec. I gotta go say sorry to Mommy first."

With that I turned and toddled back to Mommy, who was now sitting on the bench with Midnight again. Midnight smiled at me reassuringly as I approached, obvious remorse in my body language.

"Mommy?" I asked tentatively.

"Yes, Beanie Baby?" She responded, a note of frustration still lingering in her tone.

"I, uh, wanted to say, well," I took a deep breath, "I'm sorry. I was naughty and embarrassed you. I shouldn't have." Tears started to flow as I remembered Mommy's angry lecture at the tree. "I'll never do it again! Please, just don't hate me!"

Mommy's body language and tone softened immediately as I broke down during my apology. She stood up from the bench and wrapped me in a comforting hug.

"Oh, Baby Bean, I could never hate you! Mommy was just frustrated. Everyone is naughty sometimes! You just got a little too big for your britches!"

I nuzzled into Mommy as she hugged and reassured me. She was right. I had gotten too big for my britches. But, a nagging feeling told me that Mommy was going to keep me nice and little from now on, so that being 'too big' would never be an issue again.

[user2772636]

Douzième Fille

12th Girl

××《☆》××

××《☆》××

Some chances are taken too late. You only realise what you've lost when you're starting to lose them. Goodbyes are hard, especially when you've just started.

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Joseph Descamps x Reader

Warnings: ANGST ANGST ANGST, turn back now I'm warning you, goodbyes, intimate scenes, MAJOR heartbreak, swearing

References to Call Me By Your Name

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Chapter eight: Joseph, Joseph, Joseph

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It was hot that morning. I woke up in a layer of sweat, windows exuding heat, hair clinging on my neck, my blanket on the hardwood floor.

George sits on the window frame, taking the heat opposite of how I was.

I get up, groaning with a slight headache. I place my feet on the floor, keeping my eyes closed for the time being, trying to relax and gain back my senses.

There'd been a feeling in me this whole time, but as I woke up, it felt so much more evident. A clench in my chest.

I don't know where it came from or when it started, but I felt it there. It never really took my attention. Maybe it was from whatever position I was in. Or if I hadn't eaten or drank enough.

Summer is just around the corner, but I don't want it to start. It was always something I looked forward to.

Dipping into cold waters under the heat of the afternoon sun, eating fruits with their juices spilling over countertops and silverware. Tanning, sunburns, dry mouths from salt water. Then winter comes and you wait for summer again.

It's probably because I'm expecting something I know won't be there. But what is it? I have a summer job now, and I'm headed to Paris. What else could I possibly want?

I know exactly what. It's not that I'm afraid of it. It's because I can't change it. And it hurts.

Summer is when I'm supposed to be happy. He's ruined all of that now. I've got to get a grip, too. He won't care, so I shouldn't. But I care. I care a lot.

This isn't something I should think about. I'll forget him as soon as I get to Paris. I'll forget anything that's happened between us, even if nothing really did. I'll forget, and I'll forever have that feeling that I felt now. That something's there, and I'm not giving it attention.

Because deep down, I know what it is. And, it hurts.

××《☆》××

The walk to school was short-lived and ordinary. Nothing special happened. It was just brighter; which didn't really match my mood.

I was also a bit late. Most of the students were already heading in, and the bell rang as soon as I stepped through the gate.

I make my way up the staircase, keeping my head downcast and not paying anyone any mind.

All throught class it wasn't special. We did assignments, lectures, and all common school things. But the sound of pages being flipped, ink on paper, pattering of floorboards, it comforted me. I knew those sounds would stay with me throughout my life. People don't.

When class was dismissed, I took my time. I might not see this school again. I might move back to Paris. I might not see Michèle or Simone as much. And I won't, more so refuse to see Joseph ever.

It was afternoon now, so everything's brighter than this morning. And everything's hotter, too. I shade my face with my hands, squinting to see Callum's well-known car on the side of the road.

He's outside leaning on the door, smoking. I'm guessing his third cigarette today. He still has his wide smile on, and I wonder if his cheeks ever hurt.

"Good afternoon, pretty girl." He says as he patches his cigarette out. "How are you?"

"Hot." I shrug, going around the car with Callum as he opens the passenger door for me. I get inside, him as well after doing another roundabout the car.

"Well, love how you state what I already know." I think about that sentence for a while, sensing it was off. I realise what he meant, and I smack his arm.

"Oh, what now? Let me be funny!" I roll my eyes as he starts the car, a faint smile on my face. One thing I know for sure is that Callum is one of the people who would stay with me throughout my life. He was the reason I'm going back to Paris, the reason I have somewhat of a career. And I'm glad I met him, even with the circumstances of difficult feelings.

Whilst I talked about my day to him, I had realised nothing special happened because I didn't interact with Joseph. The day felt gloomy. It felt so underwhelming, so boring, because he wasn't involved.

"And it's so weird because we hadn't talked since that dinner." I tell Callum, who's been listening to me this whole time. We decided to go to a lake to cool off. It was a bit well known, but not too crowded since the school season isn’t off yet.

I made a quick pick up in my house, including a goodbye to George.

Going back, Callum nods. His hand flexes on the steering wheel.

"So, let me round this up. Joseph's mother invited you to dinner, then teased both you and him, then when he walks you out to their place, some girl-"

"The girl from the alley."

"The girl from the alley pops up from nowhere, fully dressed up."

"Exactly."

"But, why?"

"What do you mean why?"

"I mean, sure, I've never met her, but who could compete against you?"

"Okay, Callum, whatever-"

"No, I mean, how stupid can Joseph be to pick anyone but you?" This makes my breath catch on my throat.

"Don't call him stupid, Callum. He's fucking brilliant."

He quiets down, smile fading just a bit from my serious tone.

"Sorry." I had apologised.

"No need. It's fine. I just... you know what I meant."

"Yeah, I knew what you meant. Just... instict, you know?"

"I get that. You're in love, so you're defensive." He shrugs and starts to smile again. He's holding in a laugh.

"Shut up." I glare.

"Not gonna happen." I don't want it to happen.

××《☆》××

The next morning was the same. It was hot, I took a longer shower, got dressed, said goodbye to George, and headed to school.

This time, I met with Simone. I ask her about Michèle, getting worried that she hasn't come to school for two days straight. Before she could respond, she stopped in her tracks, seeing Jean Pierre across the hall.

"I- I'm sorry, Y/N, but I really need to talk to Jean Pierre. Stay here, please?" She scrunches up her face in guilt, but I simply shrug it off, knowing that if she wants to talk to someone, I shouldn't stop her. Especially if that someone is her boyfriend. Or whatever he is.

They go ahead to talk, me staying at the same place she left me, keeping a close eye on them. I lean against the wall, the hallway now a lot more quiet than when the bell rang a few minutes ago.

Their conversation lasted for only a bit because I saw Jean Pierre walking away. I head to Simone's side.

"So, what did you talk about?" She's still, and there's no emotion on her face. I worry.

"He just broke up with me." Oh. I pull her into a side hug, not knowing whether she was devastated with the news or if she was okay with it. She looked like both but neither at the same time.

I nod towards the stairwell, deciding for the both of us we should head to the courtyard to have our break. Or the bathroom for a quick cry.

We pass by a group of boys, and one of them keeps his eyes on me. Then, when I turned to glance at who it was, I realised it was just an eye.

In that moment, everything in me faded away. All the hate towards him, all the sadness, all the misunderstanding. I just wanted to talk to him again. For one last time. So I did.

"Joseph," I stop in my tracks. I tell Simone to keep going, that I'm fine left alone. She nods in acknowledgement and walks down the staircase.

I turn around to meet his stare. My breath catches in my throat, not having this kind of interaction in a while.

I walk towards him, a bit slow. "Can I talk to you?" I pause. "Alone?"

His friends tease him and push him around lightly, but his eyes are still as well as his whole body. I fear his heart might be, too.

He simply nods and silently eyes his friends to go. We're left alone near the window and take a seat in the space.

"You must be wondering why I'm talking to you again so suddenly." He stays quiet, looking down.

"Joseph..." I scoot closer. I bring both my hands up to his cheeks, only hovering above them.

He stays silent. I bring my hands back until he leans forward and into them, gently grabbing my wrists and holding them still. I feel the air come out of his nose as he exhales, body slumping down.

"I'm sorry. For everything. Ignoring you was one of the most stupid things I've done. Being angry was second." I tilt my head to see if he's opened his eye, but he keeps them closed. His thumb rubs one of my wrists.

"You should be with anyone you want to be with. It shouldn't matter to me. But, it did." He lifts his head, peering an eye. His mouth opens, then closes again. I keep going.

"I missed you. I've been missing you. I miss all the times we weren't mad at each other." I caress his cheeks, and he leans into my touch.

"I was never mad at you." Joseph says, but I shake my head.

"You were. And that's fine. It's okay to be mad at me. I get it." He furrows his brows at me.

"Don't say that. I was never mad at you. I've never been mad at you."

"But what about all those times you shouted at me? Those times in the streets?" He sighs deeply, not as relaxed as before.

"I was mad at myself, but I was letting it out on you. And I'm sorry about that. But trust me, I could never be mad at you."

We just stare at each other after. The silence fills the air, and it's the first time it was like this in a while. I had to tell him.

"I'm leaving." I feel his breath stop, and it's so nauseating.

"What?" He mumbles out.

"I'm leaving." I repeat.

"For the summer?" He squints, the gears turning in his head. I wish it was only for the summer.

"No," I look down. "For good."

He pulls away from my hands, sitting straight again.

"No..." He shakes his head. "Don't lie to me."

"I would never." I look him dead in the eye, not wanting him to think that I would ever do.

"Exactly. I know you'd never. So why are you lying to me now? This is some joke, right? Like a cliffhanger for next year. Right?" I simply stare at him.

"Y/N, please tell me you're lying. I'll let it slide. Tell me you're lying." He begs, grabbing a hold of my dropped hands.

I don't move. I don't look at him. I don't say anything. That was enough of an answer.

"No..." He whispers. He does it all over again as he gets up and paces. He rubs at his eye, and I get up and say "Stop."

He stills. I see the tear stains reflect off his cheeks from the sunlight outside coming in. His head is down as it was before. I sigh deeply, placing my hands on his shoulders.

"Come here." I pull him in, and he immediately engulfs me in an embrace. He sobs desperately, and I try my hardest not to join him.

A series of "please don't go"s spill out of his quivering mouth, and my brain goes numb. He's shaking. His heart is pounding. His mind's all over the place.

I hush him, rubbing his back like I do with a baby, whispering nothings into his ear. When he stops, his body is still slumped down to hold mine.

"We wasted so many days. Why didn't you tell me sooner?" He asks once we're sat back down the window.

"I tried. I promise. We were still mad." He laughs, and it's been such a long time that my brain got nostalgia.

"Fuck. I'm gonna miss you all over again." He bites his lip as he looks down, fiddling with the inseam of his pants. I purse my lips together.

"We'll keep in touch." He shakes his head.

"You'd be everywhere."

"I'll call your home phone."

"I'm not gonna be home in the summer."

"I'll call wherever you are."

"Thank god you thought of something for that because I was ready to start sobbing again." He laughs again, and the suns back in his eyes. Like it left and came back.

I grab a hold of his hands, stopping him from fidgeting. I make him look back up at me.

"I promise I'll phone you every day. I'll send you letters, postcards, and pictures. I'll even send you some magazines I'm in." I shrug, and he smiles.

"I don't think you have to do that last one. I'm keeping my eye on every magazine booth here on out." We chuckle together. We stay quiet again, then Joseph tucks my hair behind my ear.

"You're beautiful, Y/N Pardine. You'll do great out there. I'm only a phone call or a pen away." I flush at his bluntness and smile sweetly. He does, too.

××《☆》××

The party happened. We spent almost the whole time together. We had even danced.

An American song called "At Last" plays in the background as Joseph holds me, dancing slowly.

His hands cup my waist, my arms wrapped around his neck, his forehead against mine. I play with the ends of his hair as he caresses my body.

We laugh, we drink, we talk, and we glance. We do what we missed. We held each other. We absorbed one another.

There was a time in that party that happened between Simone and Jean Pierre. Thank god he finally said something of the truth, because that breakup was a straight lie.

Anyways, the night ended, but nothing happened. I don't know what I was expecting, but there was a feeling something special could've happened to me. Like a string tugging on my insides.

Something to do with pretty pink lips.

××《☆》××

The next morning, I woke up with his arms around me.

He smelt of fading whiskey, cigarette smoke, and expensive cologne. Just as he always did.

His eye patch was off, his hair a mess, and his jacket's on the floor. His shirt is wrinkled, he's breathing evenly as one does in their sleep, and there's a small snore coming from him. It's adorable.

When I get up, or at least try to, his grip on me tightens. Not in a way that hurts, but it's strong enough for me to come collapsing on his chest. He's warm again.

"Five more minutes." He groans, and I sigh deeply. Five more minutes will be alright.

Ten minutes pass, and only then do we get up. I hand him a towel and some clothes, my father's again, then one of my own, then usher him to the bathroom. I fix our bed, pick his jacket up off the floor, and fold it neatly.

Once I hear the shower turn off and the door creak, I try my best not to turn and just... stare. It's creepy, I know. But, who could blame me? I mean, I was leaving for good.

Right. Leaving for good.

I feel his arms wrap around my waist, his head tucking into my neck, his nose poking at some sensitive spots. I squeal silently, and he chuckles to himself, the vibration of his chest spreading around my back.

"Want some breakfast?" He whispers. George lies by the windowsill, watching the both of us in embrace. His tail moves around, eyes blinking slowly. He's glowing from the sunlight hitting him.

"If you don't mind. Please, and thank you." I turn my head a bit towards him. He nods, pressing a kiss to my hair. I smile to myself whilst I check things off my list last minute.

He's done with breakfast by the time I finish my quick shower. I'm fully dressed now. The only things missing are my coat and my suitcases.

Joseph sits across from me. We were in this position before.

"So, how's Callum? Still a prick?" He says as he stabs on some of the eggs he made. I finish my bite before answering.

"Callum's doing fine. I don't know why you've always been so off about him. He's a good guy." I shrug, tilting my head for an answer. "What's got you like that?"

He sighs, dropping his utensils gently on the table top. I place a hand over his, and he turns it to hold mine.

"Felt like he stole you from me." He mumbles, but it was clear enough for me to hear.

I purse my lips at this remark. "No one's gonna keep me away from you. Except that girl that actually did." I laugh as Joseph groans.

"I already told you, I didn't even know her." From this, I kept going.

"Well, then why did you basically call me a slut?" I raise my eyebrows in amusement, as to show that I moved on from it. Still, I was curious.

He pauses. For a long time. I begin to worry, thinking he actually meant it. I try to pull my hand away, but his grip turns firm.

"No." Joseph whispers out of desperation. He's taking deep breaths. I can tell he's overthinking. But I need to know the truth.

"You've got to tell me, Joseph. Otherwise, we'll shrug each other off again. Do you want that?" I push on him. He needs to tell me. I need to know.

"No. I don't want that. Just..." He closes his eyes, readying himself.

"The boys wanted to talk to you. I couldn't let them. I knew how they meant. And I'll just put it simply that they meant badly. So I had to tell them things about you that weren't true so they could get pushed away from the idea of you." He cups my cheeks from across the table. I lean into his touch.

"I don't want anyone to take advantage of you. Thank whatever god is up there that I found out because if I hadn't..." He breathes in deeply, caressing my face with his thumb. "I don't even want to think about that. Okay?"

I nod. I get up from my seat to give him a hug. He remains seated, his face pressed up on my stomach. I rub his back and comb fingers through his hair.

He stands up slowly, hands still attached to my hips. They roam up to my wait as he hovers over me, and I feel my breath hitch in my throat. He's so close. His nose just bumps into mine. He's looking down at me. At my eyes. At my lips. His breath is haggard.

"Callum's probably waiting." I whisper, my breath fanning over both our lips. Our lips only an inch away from eachother.

"Let him wait." His voice is low. He's starting to make my knees buckle.

A loud crash is heard throughout the flat. I yelp away from him. Now we're feet away from each other, cheeks flushed and hair tousled. As if we did something. And we didn't even.

George meows on the kitchen counter, staring at us innocently with the keys now on the floor. I sigh deeply, walking towards him and picking him up.

"Oh, I hope you don't mind, but," I hand George to Joseph. "My baby's yours."

His eye widens in surprise, then he switches his gaze from me to the cat, then back to me, then back to the cat.

"I can't..." I shake my head, smiling.

"He's yours, Joseph. That's final. He already loves you more than me. It's alright. Plus everytime you see him, you think of me."

He flushes, demeanour relaxing. "I already think of you too much."

It's my turn to flush now. But I respond. "Good."

××《☆》××

We arrive at the train station. I bid a thank you and goodbye to Joseph's mother, hugging her for a short while. Joseph carries all my belongings.

I spot Callum at a bench.

"Callum, you remember Joseph." I nod to Joseph. He drops my things next to Callum's.

"Of course I do. The infamous lover boy. It was nice meeting you, man." Callum shakes Joseph's hand. Joseph purses his lips tightly, gripping on Callum's hand.

"I'm still not sure about you... but she trusts you, so I should, too." Callum nods firmly. They let go of their handshake.

"Well, I better get our things in. Say your final goodbyes." He moves to go in the train. Me and Joseph are alone again.

"Got your pretty things intact?" Joseph teases, and I simply laugh.

"Yes, I do." I look up at him. He moves closer, hands on his hips.

"One day, I'll hear those words again." There's a feeling in me. Like dejavu, but a feeling from the future. I couldn't explain it, but what he said made sense. Like I knew, I would say those words again, too.

We stand in silence. I walked closer, embracing him for one last time. He leans down, his hands tight around me, his head over mine. I feel a lump in my throat.

We held each other for one last time. We smelt each other for one last time. We absorbed each other one last time.

I try to pull away, but he pulls me back in. The lump grows bigger.

When we finally pull away, my eyes start to sting. I palm my throat, trying to push that growing lump down. His hands are on my shoulders. He lets go.

"Goodbye, Y/N Pardine." He mutters, his voice breaking.

"Goodbye, Joseph Descamps." I mock him with a smile on my face.

I turn around and walk on the train. Joseph follows me, guiding me up the steps. His hand holds onto mine. I hang on the pole.

The train blares its horns, and it starts to move very slowly. The tears escape my eyes. He wipes it away.

"Y/N," he says. "I love you."

I sob. I laugh. It's a bit ugly.

"I love you, too. So much."

He stands on his toes and kisses me. His pretty pink lips are finally on mine. I grip the trains pole harder.

The trains blares again, and my kisses become more desperate. The train moves faster and faster, and Joseph starts to run. His lips start parting from mine, tears dropping even more.

"Come back to me, Y/N!" He shouts. He's still running. He's laughing now. And he's crying. He's beautiful. He gets farther, farther, and farther.

Then he's gone.

××《☆》××

End- Chapter eight: Joseph, Joseph, Joseph

Next- Chapter nine: ______

××《☆》××

I'm actually crying omfg. This hits so diff w the song in the background. Its short but omfg the angst. Help me. Hahhahahahaha.

[dogwithrabies]

what if.. hybrid scara in his breeding season and he needs help? he's usually submissive but he wants to try dominate you, and you agreed! he was a bit shy at first but later on he's pounding into you in rapid pace as you shake in overstimulation, moaning nonstop, begging him to slow down, back arched, eyes rolled, toes curled, squirted multiple times, just 😵‍💫😵‍💫‼️‼️

can you add some degradation kink pls? ○|￣|＿

also can I be "st4rz anon"?

Hello st4rz!! Apologies for the time this took me,, i got busy''' I wasn't sure what kind of hybrid you meant so I went with a kitty I hope that's fine!! i think I strayed a bit from the original prompt but I hope u enjoy it nonetheless <3

【★】 cws: gn reader but described as afab, sub reader, this is not proof read

word count: 1.6k

Kunikuzushi was always good at being sneaky, you hadn’t even heard him until he sat next to you on the couch, arms instantly around your waist. You felt his hot breath on your neck as he left a trail of kisses. Affection was a thing he seldom initiated, so it was always something you cherished. Actually communicating and asking for things just wasn’t his style. He usually just sat around you, slightly pouting (though he’d deny it if you pointed it out), hoping you’d get the hint.

However, today was not the case.

His heat had arrived earlier than expected, leaving his most uninhibited desires on full display. Now facing him, you sneak your arms around his neck pulling him for a kiss. It’s pleasant, and his lips feel nice against yours. But you can feel a tinge of desperation on his part, an urge to deepen it. Nibbling on your lower lip as if asking for permission, he sneaks his tongue into your mouth when he feels your lips parting.

It’s only when you’re effectively left breathless that he pulls away.

“Needy much?”, he’s not looking at you but he can just feel the smirk forming on your face.

He shifts lower, “Shush.” he mutters while readjusting himself, no longer straddling your hips, choosing instead to lay in between your legs.

You don’t miss the hardness poking your thigh.

He doesn’t give you the time to address it though, immediately pulling you in another kiss, even more desperate than the previous one. He feels your hands moving lower on his torso, grabbing and pulling at his shirt, urging him to take it off. Usually, he would oblige. Letting you take the dominant role whenever you got intimate was almost second nature to him. He wouldn’t call himself a sub, lest his ego implodes, and the thought of taking the upper hand had been buzzing in his mind for a while.

Today was the day, he decided.

He pulls away, grabs your hands, and pins them at your sides. Your eyes meet his and you open your mouth to question him, but the words die in your throat when you see just how intensely he’s looking at you. His stare has always been intense but now he looks like he’s fully undressing you with his eyes. His expression, however… is he embarrassed? He huffs and looks away when you make eye contact. Does he want to ask you something?

His eagerness makes you guess that his heat has arrived. You’ve helped him through it countless times already. A light bulb went on in your mind.

“Do you want to top?”, you speak up. Face flushed, he hesitates but then nods silently.

Moving his hands, he grabs the hem of your shirt he pulls it up and over your head. Now that he has better access, he latches onto your neck again. Biting and licking and covering you in his own marks. He always gets more possessive during moments like these. Realistically, he knows you’re his (as much as he is yours), but it’s a desire that comes from deep within. His shorts feel even tighter when hears you slightly whimper as he keeps his assault on your neck. His hips move on their own and he finds himself grinding against your core. Your hands move down his torso once again, and this time he lets you. Your touch on his bare skin leaves a tingling sensation, he feels a shiver running down his spine as he feels you touching lower.

There’s no reason to tease himself like this any further, his carnal urges take over. In a quick motion, he takes off your pants and the rest of his clothes, leaving you completely bare in front of him.

The wetness between your thighs arouses him further. With two fingers, he runs them along your folds, slowly toying with you. He swirls them one last time before pulling away. Covered in your slick, he brings them to his mouth. His tongue darts out as he licks his fingers clean of your essence.

“Kuni,” your voice brings him out of his thoughts and back to the matter at hand.

“Please?” Well, how could he ever say no to you?

He finally puts his palm around his neglected member and aligns it with your hole. He drags it up and down covering it in slick, the sensation makes him shudder. While you’re squirming under him, he pushes in, slowly sinking into you. A moan escapes from his lips as the pleasure engulfs him.

His head sinks in the crook of your neck, muffled pants can be heard as he struggles to keep his composure. Your hands run down his back soothingly, encouraging him to take his time. He’s not usually this sensitive… hell, he’s been fucked senseless multiple times, but his heats truly take a toll on him. Slowly, he starts thrusting into you, quickly falling into a steady rhythm.

Each thrust sends pleasure through you, your moans just spur him on. His name falls from your lips like a mantra as your grip on his back grows stronger. He hits deep, a feeling of fullness overwhelming you every time he pushes in fully.

There’s a spot that makes you clench on him harder. He chases that feeling, focusing all his energy on hitting it continuously. Your back arches and your moans become more frequent the more he pounds into that spot. Your climax builds up fast, Kunikuzushi's moans right by your ears certainly don't make you a favor.

It doesn’t take long before you come undone around him, your fingers scratching his back and your legs locking behind him. He keeps moving allowing you to ride your orgasm out.

Actually, he never stops thrusting.

“Kuni-” “I’m not finished.” He cuts in before you even get to finish.

He grabs your legs and pushes them toward your chest. This new angle allows him to hit deeper.

“I’m gonna keep going until I'm satisfied” he speaks between thrusts, mind completely fogged by lust. Keeping up is impossible, the relentless slide of his length hitting deeper with each thrust.

Pleasure slowly turns into overwhelming overstimulation, but he keeps going undaunted.

“You’re gonna take me right?” he whispers by your ear. “You’re gonna be good for me…?” His sultry voice rings in your ears. He’s not really waiting for an answer, it sounds more like he’s making these statements for himself. He grunts as he speeds up the pace, cursing under his breath as he feels himself getting closer. He can feel everything, every time you clench around him his stomach churns.

He leans down and bites into your shoulder to muffle his moans. Bottoming out one last time he releases into you, thick white ropes as deep as he can reach. He keeps moving, riding out his high till the end. Letting go of your legs, he lays down limp on your chest.

You're both just catching your breaths for a while, chests heaving up and down quickly.

"I like this uh, rougher side of you" You break the silence first.

He hums next to your ear, holding himself up with his arms so he can get a better look at your face. It's messy, still blushing and hair sticking to your forehead.

"Good, 'cause I'm not finished yet." Getting up completely, he pulls out his, still hard, cock. Turning you to lay on your stomach, he observes as his come leaks out of you. He can't have that going to waste, so he uses his fingers to scoop it back inside before sinking himself into you again.

The sudden intrusion makes you gasp, you turn around to look at him. He stares back at you with a proud smirk on his face, but it fades quickly as he asks you for permission to keep going. When you nod, he doesn't waste a second and grabs your waist dragging you to him as he starts moving again. 

Despite having finished once already, he still finds himself twitching with need and eager to fill you up again. The sight of his come leaking out of you aroused him, it revived a spark of possessiveness he usually (tries to) keeps hidden.

He wants more of that.

Leaning his chest over your back he gets close to your ear. "A-are you enjoying this?" he says between pants. You try to answer, but all that comes out is a winded whimper. "Do you like it when I use you like this?"

He laughs above you, his grip on you getting tighter. "Can't talk? Have I fucked you stupid already?" he says mimicking the sentences you told him during your previous sexcapades. One of his hands slides from your waist and between your legs, settling on your clit. He rubs his fingers at an agonizingly slow pace, intending to draw out more of your noises. Thin fingers move from your neck to your back, moving your hair so he can leave some marks on the untouched skin of your neck. Biting and licking, he doesn't intend to leave any spot blank. Moving down to your shoulder he only gets harsher, latching himself onto a spot until it bruises.

His name rolls off your tongue, it's muffled but he can still hear it. The sight of your back arched and your pleas for him go straight to his dick. He holds still for a moment, pushing himself as deep as he can before releasing once again. But the break is short lived, not even giving you time to catch your breath as he starts moving his hips again. His come gushes around his member, leaking out of your hole and onto your couch. Neither of you cares at the moment, Kuni being too busy fucking himself into you to even notice. It would be a while until he gets his fill anyway.

[micksslut]

the bride and the driver

charles leclerc x fem reader

summary: the story of how the jilted bride and the unlucky driver ended up comforting each other on a lonely night.

word count: 3.2k

warnings/mood: angst (?, fluff, sad charles, sad reader, reader is jilted by her fiancé, mentions of monaco 22 gp, charles is the cutest human, reader doesn't eat well for a while. this is a google translator shit, that's a real warning, so please don't hesitate to tell me if there are mistakes of any kind in the one shot 😭 (i think that's all, but tell me if I forgot something pls!).

notes: hI, this is my first one shot on tumblr, and i must mention that it's also the first of my writings that i publish in english, bc i speak spanish. so please i ask you for a little patience. 😭

i hope you like it, please don't be a ghost reader!!!!

The calm sound of the waves, the dark night and the full moon in front of you, were not able to eliminate the memory of what you had experienced a few hours ago.

     The only thing you could remember was that church aisle you had entered where there was no groom waiting for you.

     The looks of pity from your so-called friends, from the priest and from your parents and his was something you would never forget.

     The way your smile transformed, the way you turned and ran for your life and refused to look back.

     It was like a dagger that stabbed into your heart over and over and over again, but it wasn't enough to kill you, like he were just hitting you in the hope that you would die alive alone, slowly and agonizingly.

     How dare he take everything you've ever dreamed of from you? Your dream life, your dream wedding, your future dream family. Everything you've dreamed of since you were a little girl.

     He was the perfect man, and yet he dared not only stand you up at church, but destroy your life as well. You had loved him so much until it had started to hurt you, until you knew you would do anything for him and he had only to ask for it, perhaps not even ask for it, you would guess it and bring it to him as a subject bearing royalties to his king.

     And the funny thing was that you hadn't shed any tears until you had reached the beach. Instead, you took a single gardenia from your bridal bouquet and dropped the rest along with the long skirt of your beautiful wedding dress down a random lonely street in Monaco and kept the short skirt, the one you were meant to wear to the ballroom dance with your husband. You took the bottle of wine and the bottle of tequila that were going to be served at your wedding reception (the same ones that you had been told were the best in Monaco, so you didn't want to leave either of them to anyone else) and you went straight to buy a pack of cigarettes and headed to the loneliest beach to be found in the beautiful little country.

     You took another drag on your cigarette, hot tears running down your cheeks and staining your face. A shuddering sigh left your lips as you hugged your legs.

     You sobbed, thinking that under different circumstances, you would be at your best friend's apartment with her getting drunk next to you and telling you what an idiot your now ex was.

     But that was the thing. You didn't really have any friends. You knew nothing beyond him. For almost four years, all you knew was him.

     Your so-called friends were part of your guests, but you couldn't go to any of them because you knew they were their friends too; You had met them through him, and despite the many times he had told you that over time they had become more your friends than his, you knew that was not true. Actually, you were now considering that maybe they knew about your ex fiancé's plans to leave you...

     And your family? Well, they weren't that supportive either. Starting with your cousin with whom your ex fiancé had cheated on you and for whom he had left you. And continuing with your parents... Because of them you met him in the first place, so surely if you went to them the first thing they would say would be "What did you do to make him leave you?" And as much as you tried to explain, they would see you as the culprit and tell you to beg him to come back to you.

     "Do you mind if I sit here?" a boy's voice startled you.

     "No, go ahead" you immediately sniffled and wiped your face as best you could.

     You looked at him, he was wearing a black sweatshirt and blue jeans, with his head covered by its hood.

     He sat on the sand in the same position as you resting his arms on his knees and when he noticed your gaze on him he smiled gently at you, he was very handsome.

     "I'm Charles, by the way" he extended his right hand to you and you accepted it after a few seconds, because when you looked at him and the dim yellow light of the lanterns illuminated him,  you realized it was that Formula 1 driver: Charles Leclerc. But you weren't going to say anything to him, you didn't want to make him uncomfortable.

     Then you introduced yourself and you both fell into a comfortable silence, for although you were sitting on a beach and their eyes were on the blue sea, their minds were elsewhere.

     "You're probably wondering why I have a veil and a wedding dress and smeared makeup," you suddenly commented, making Charles look at you.

     "Actually yes, but it would be impolite to ask when I don't know you" he admitted and you laughed without humor, taking another drag of your cigarette.

     "Well, i was abandoned in the church" you rushed to say and he was silent for a few seconds, trying to process what you had said, not because of the fact that you had revealed to him that you had been abandoned, in fact he already imagined it from your appearance, but because of the fact that you had been abandoned.

     He couldn't help but wonder, how could someone abandon a woman like you? He didn't even know you but he knew you were the most beautiful woman his eyes had ever had the pleasure of seeing.

     "I don't know if it's any consolation to you but I'm so sorry" he mentally slammed himself at how stupid it sounded.

     "It doesn't really work for me, but thanks," he laughed awkwardly at your frankness.

     "What an idiot" Charles commented, not knowing what to say.

     "Yes, right? I mean, we had the perfect life guaranteed, financial stability, emotional stability, children, a happy family…" your voice came out at the end like a whisper, unable to continue. "And he just... He just left me, and he left me for my cousin, that's the worst" you laughed almost maniacally taking a shot of the tequila in your hand.

     "I don't even like tequila, I swear. But I need it like shit. I need tequila as much now as I needed him."

     He fell silent. Any word had been caught in his throat when he heard your broken voice and how broken you were.

    What were you supposed to say to a bride who had just been dumped at her wedding in front of so many people?

     He would hug you, but Charles didn't want you to think he was a nut who went through life hugging sad strangers.

     You pressed your cigarette against the tequila bottle, putting it out and leaving the bottle in the sand.

     "I…" he was about to say when you suddenly stood up, making him think you were going to leave, but instead you asked him a question.

     "Do you like my dress?" You smiled at him without any happiness on your face.

     He got confused and it was obvious, so when he didn't answer you repeated the question.

     "Do you like my dress?" this time you didn't allow him to answer because you spoke again "I said if you like my dress" you started to get upset "I said if you like my dress" you repeated it once and twice and Charles had his heart broken "I said if you like my…" your voice cracked again and the boy immediately stood up wrapping you in a hug, he didn't care when you hit him lightly on his chest with your hands in an attempt to get him let you go, Charles knew you needed that.

     You finally let yourself sob into his chest, wrapping your arms around his torso, finding comfort in his arms, in the hug that you had desperately and silently needed since you had left that damned church.

     "It's beautiful, and you too" he told you in a whisper.

     "You're lying, I look gross" you answered with your choked voice and you felt him shake his head.

     "No. You're beautiful and he was an idiot to leave a woman like you" Leclerc was sincere and you almost smile.

     "I just don't get it, Charles. I swear I've dedicated myself to him and our relationship for the last few years, I've done everything possible for him" you remembered how you left your friends when he asked you to, how you didn't wear the clothes you liked because he didn't like it, how you didn't listen to the music you liked because he didn't like it "I don't understand what I did wrong. I loved him so much" your voice sounded hoarse from the hours you had spent crying and his heart squeezed to hear you like that.

     "You didn't do anything wrong. It wasn't your fault" he assured.

     "Damn, I was going to be a very pretty wife, even..." you sighed between tears at the memory that made you feel more and more ridiculous "We were even going to dance with Lover by Taylor Swift. It's what I've always wanted since that fuckin album came out" you laughed, but there really wasn't a hint of amusement in your voice.

     "I am sure that one day you will be an excellent wife, and you will have your dance with Taylor Swift in the background with the person you love and who loves you in the same way or more" you finally smiled a little.

     "But now I'm here... venting on the first stranger who was nice to me. I'm sorry. You're so cute, you must think I'm terribly pathetic" you lamented, and the fact that he might think you were pathetic made you want to cry all over again.

     "Don't say that. I don't think that. But if it makes you feel any easier, I'm hugging a stranger in a wedding dress, so…" you let out a laugh and the Monegasque's heart sped up.

     "You know, I didn't choose this dress, or the veil, or even the damn bouquet of flowers. My ex mother in law chose it..." you said more calmly after a few seconds, but still with a broken voice thinking about how weird it was to call her like that "I thought that's how all mothers in law were, but she... I starved myself for a week to get into this damn dress" you shed another tear, thinking about how insecure that woman made you feel about your body, and the times she asked the designer to adjust the dress to make you look slimmer.

     "God, that's not fair. It was your wedding…" Charles muttered. He was surprised at himself for how angry he could be with people he didn't even know. Hearing how excited you were about your wedding and having it ruined for you like that was horrible. "How can someone be so cruel?"

     "I don't know, I wonder the same thing" you closed your eyes tightly while trying not to continue crying.

     "Hey, hey. Calm down, okay?" Charles separated from you taking you gently by the cheeks and wiping your tears with his thumbs while you looked at him. "I know it's not going to be like the perfect wedding you wanted, but…" he licked his lips nervously and you looked at him confused, releasing him, missing his touch as he reached into his front pants pockets to pull out his phone.

     You were going to ask what he was doing while browsing on his phone, but your words got stuck in your throat when you heard the melody you knew very well playing on his phone.

     Your heart skipped a beat when the intro of Lover by Taylor Swift played on his phone and a smile spread across your lips. You closed your eyes shedding a couple more tears, but neither of you knew if its were from sadness or happiness.

     "I have no idea how to dance it, but if you teach me... You can still dance Lover tonight, even if it's with a stranger."

     You nodded several times, unable to say anything. He wiped away your tears once more and linked your right hand with his.

     "Can I?" he asked you, referring to if he could hold you by the waist, looking at you with those puppy dog ​​eyes that you were now sure you adored.

     "Of course" you smiled softly, and Charles was sure he would do anything to see you smile again.

     Your breath caught for a moment when he ran his hand around your waist. His too.

     You weren't going to deny it, he was probably the most handsome boy you'd ever seen, and he was also the only person who had been nice to you in the last few days. He just won your heart. And you his.

     You started teaching him the basic steps, inevitably laughing when he messed up, delighted to hear his laugh too.

     You had rehearsed the dance so many times that you knew it backwards and forwards, but now you were sure that with the man you were going to marry it would not have turned out as well as it did with Charles.

     The song ended with laughter, and you two fell lying down into the sand with bright smiles on your faces.

     You turned your head to look at the boy.

     "And why were you here? I don't seem to be the only one who cried tonight" you mentioned.

     He sighed looking away. "I'm a professional driver. Today was my home race and... everything went to shit" You wouldn't lie, you were surprised by his honesty about his profession. You always thought that famous athletes preferred to stay in line with that; but you had just told him that you had been stood up in church about to getting married, so the fact stopped surprising you almost immediately.

     It was funny that you had so much confidence in a boy you had just met, and that he had you. But it felt cute.

     "The home races are very special for you drivers, right?" you asked.

     "They are. I'm the only driver from Monaco on the grid, and it seems like every year I just manage to disappoint everyone." Leclerc pursed his lips into a fine line, and you saw the defeat in his eyes, and also the way in which it crystallized.

     "I don't think you will. I don't think everyone always has perfect races, there are things that just can't go right sometimes, and that's not great, but that's what there is" you knew you weren't the best at consoling, but you made an effort.

    "But not every year, and not at home races" Charles complained.

     "And why was it shit?" you asked and he sighed again.

     "My team made a terrible stop to change the tires" he answered, without going into technicalities of the sport, he didn't know if you had any idea what he was talking about.

     "So why do you think they're disappointed in you? It wasn't your fault, Charles." you repeated the words that the Monegasque had said to you earlier.

     "It just seems like I'll never be able to give them a good run in my own country. They even call it 'The Curse of Monaco.'" He sat back in his previous position, bringing his hands to his face to cover it in frustration.

     You sat up too, and your hand reached behind his back, stopping before you touch him, not quite sure whether to hug him or just give him a shoulder squeeze.

     "And did you talk to your team?" You finally decided to bring your right hand to his right shoulder and give him a gentle squeeze.

    "Yes, but I can't be too hard on them..." he cleared his throat as his voice cracked slightly at the end of the sentence.

    "Because you know these things can happen" you guessed.

    "Something like that"

    "Then why, if you're not so hard on them, why are you so hard on yourself?" you asked, and Charles seemed to have been given the hardest question on some math test.

     "I... don't know." you two looked at the waves of the sea rising.

     "How about we don't try to say any more words of consolation tonight? Let's pretend we've known each other for years, and let's just be two old friends catching up on each other's lives" He looked at you pleadingly and you nodded.

     "That's great because I think I can do a better job making you forget this than giving you words of comfort. So what do you think about going to buy two liters of chocolate ice cream and eat it until we can no longer?" you rested your chin on his left shoulder and Charles glanced at you as a smile formed on his lips.

     "I think my coach is going to kill me if he finds out, but it will be worth it" it was your turn to smile and you moved away from him to take the gardenia from your bridal bouquet and you put the flower behind his ear while he looked at you as if you were one of the stars that shone in the sky; maybe that's what you were for him.

     "Gardenias look better on you than on me" you smiled at Charles and you took the bottle of tequila again, taking a sip and offering him a drink which he gladly accepted.

     "I'm afraid I'm going to miss him forever, Charles," you admitted, while now leaning your cheek on his shoulder, looking at the full moon.

     "Maybe you'll miss him for a while, and that's not bad, you were with him for a long time. But you won't miss him forever" he assured you, and you knew from the way he said it, that he was speaking by experience "Things happen for a reason. And I'm sure you'll soon realize that not marrying him was the best thing that could have happened to you."

     "Well, you're really good at comforting people, I already felt threatened by your talent, so we better go get that ice cream before it gets too late" he burst out laughing and you stood up doing the same, taking your white sneakers and offering him a hand.

     "Does this unlucky driver want to spend the night with this jilted bride?"

     "He wants" he smiled at you and took your hand as he stood up, and Charles looked at the bottle of wine stuck in the sand.

     "Won't you take it?"

     "Oh shit. Right. Take it, we'll open it there. My ex sister in law bought it, she said it was the best wine in Monaco" you laughed as he bent down to inspect it, nodding "So I didn't want to leave it to them."

    The driver smiled at you. Lord, maybe he could already be falling in love with you, wasn't that amazing?

     You gave him a squeeze, so that they would leave there and nodded, being sure that from now on he would follow you to the end of the world if you asked him to.

     And that's how the story of the jilted bride and the unlucky driver began.

what do you think??? 🦋💘

[aleksanderscult]

Hello, I started following your blog pretty recently and I agree with most of what you think. I felt so confused when I finished the books and came on tumblr to see everyone hailing malina as the perfect relationship and I was glad to know that I wasn't the only one who disliked him.

I wanted to ask you something, im not sure if I saw this on this blog, but someone said that zoya is an example of toxic feminism in YA fantasy. Which checked out to me, but it also felt that bardugo added misogyny, feminism and toxic feminism in the SaB series.

Misogyny since alina had to face sloot-shaming in every book (almost entirely by Malyen ugh 😒). I felt that she really tried and suceeded to be feminist with genya, since she actually stood up for herself and had many facets to her personality. She also wasn't an important character just because of her beauty or anything super superficial. Genya IS a strong female character, and she wasn't 'broken' by the king, despite the foul things he did.

But zoya.. my god, I really wanted to like her, but I just couldn't. She is mean and hot headed to the point where I really don't see any redeeming factors to her. I always liked 'mean girl character who isnt as shallow as she seems' in fantasy novels, but she didnt exactly have a redemption arc either. If the darkling had warned her about expanding the fold in the first book, she would have fought for him. I think she isnt a strong female character, but just a girl who is a bully and decided to help mc since the antagonist hurt her specifically. She doesnt even think of the other casualties of novokribirsk. I think the 'break nikolais heart, I'll comfort him and make a magnificent queen' part was a joke, but still....

Please excuse my yapping. I haven't read crooked kingdom and nikolais duology, so I don't know if the characters had any developement since then, so please ignore any innacuracies of this text pertaining to that. Do you have any thoughts on this?

(Do you allow emoji annons? If so, can I be 🎀 annon?)

(Of course I do! You can use any emoji you want and ribbons remind me of coquettish things 😍)

Genya in S&B was my favorite version of her. She was traumatised by the King's abuse, that's true. But she wasn't solely that.

(Here's a meta about that version of her that I once did)

She was very brave, vengeful, intelligent, politically aware, had a sense of humor and was kind. There were different aspects to her personality and wasn't solely "the victim" as many fans of the Grishaverse like to portray her. But in Nikolai's duology Bardugo either forgot how to write complex situations within a court or just doesn't know how to (or it doesn't suit her 🙃).

She threw all the blame to the Darkling (as if he was entirely at fault for her sexually abuse), forgot that Grisha were serfs meant to please and serve the royal family (hence why the Darkling gave her to the Queen) and also forgot how it was the Queen who withdrew her protection and allowed her husband to abuse her. Also, a slight amnesia to how Genya herself decided to stay and take revenge. Essentially, the character became Leigh's mouthpiece to remind the reader that the Darkling is a heartless motherfucker that is undeserving of redemption. How banal.

Now about Zoya. Zoya is the typical female character that we encounter in media nowadays. A girlboss that kicks ass, is rude, has no sensitivity and threatens everyone. Again, cliché. But Leigh broke her own in-universe laws when she gave Zoya the protagonist's role.

Meaning:

The narrative with Alina as a protagonist: "You can't have feelings for your enemy!! You can't be independent! You need to depend on your toxic, childhood friend and...what is this? Power?? You took three amplifiers?? WELL SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR POWERS THAT KEEP YOU HEALTHY AND STRONG!!"

The narrative with Zoya as a protagonist: "Take the amplifiers, take the power to turn into a dragon, let's also have a Saint in your head giving you advice and guess?!? You just got promoted into a Queen and soon enough you will marry the love of your life!! Kudos!!"

That's basically what happened.

It would be an amazing end if only:

- Otkazat'sya didn't hate the Grisha's guts.

- Zoya had the qualities of a leader and a Queen instead of being handed the throne on a silver plate from an illegitimate son who failed in his job.

- The author didn't break her own rules just to prove and show how "awesome" her protagonists are.

- The same author didn't copy paste the storyline of Daenerys Targaryen into Zoya's (somehow she needed to appear cool and sympathetic)

- Half of the fandom didn't hate the primary protagonists now than they ever did before.

So basically Leigh infuriated the fandom even more about Alina's fate when she gave Zoya everything.

And about your question if the characters had any development in the later books after the trilogy. I've got some bad news, my friend. 🥲

[kpop---scenarios]

Linked (3)

Pairing: Byun Baekhyun x Reader

Warning: Smut, Heartbreak

Word Count: 3.8k

Chapter One / Chapter Two

“I had a great time tonight.” Shownu grins, as he walks you up to your door. You give him a smile back, you couldn't stop thinking of what happened with Mr. Byun at the restaurant, the scenes flashed through your head as you remembered the feeling of his fingers, his hot breath on your neck.

“Thank you for everything.” You say, giving him a small wave. You turn to open your door, but Shownu reaches out, grabbing onto your wrist. He pulls your body into his, his other hand moving to your cheek. Before you can say anything he leans down, gently pressing his lips to yours. You wanted to melt into the kiss, you wanted to make it more passionate. Shownu was nice, handsome, funny, sweet and smart. He was everything you could need or want in a man, and best of all, he was single. So why did you feel so guilty? Why did it feel like your heart was going to shatter at the feeling of his lips on yours?

You pull away, whispering a small thanks, going inside and shutting the door. You wished you could have invited him in, maybe you just wanted to use him to get your mind off of Baekhyun, would that have been so bad?

You took a shower, trying to scrub the shame of the evening off your body in an attempt to make yourself feel better, but it didn't work. You couldn't fully tell how you felt but it wasn't right. Ashamed? Guilty? Frustrated? All the above? You didn't want to see anyone else for the rest of the weekend, and that's exactly what you did. You holed up in your apartment, watching shows, eating food and staying in your pj's the entire time. By the time Monday morning rolled around, part of you was ready to interact with humans again but the other part wanted to stay in your bed and do nothing.

You walked into the office Monday morning with your head down. You didn't want to see Shownu, and you sure as fuck didn't want to see Baekhyun. You gave a small wave to anyone who said hi to you, but you didn't make eye contact with anyone. Your head is still down as you walk into your office, as you go to your desk you hang up your jacket, praying the day goes quickly. And luckily for you it does. The clock hits 5pm and you can't wait to get the fuck out of there. You had successfully avoided all interaction with Baekhyun and Shownu. Now you are going to go to the bathroom quickly before heading home. You walk back to your office at a fast pace and your head down. You walk into your office and you see a pair of black shoes standing in the middle of the room. You can feel it instantly. The pull, the need, the pure erotic lust you'd felt before. Slowly you raised your head, seeing Baekhyun standing in a fitted suit, his face stone cold.

“What can I do for you, Mr. Byun?” You ask, grabbing your jacket, refusing to look him in the eyes.

“This isn't what I wanted.” He says. His voice is softer than how his face looked. “I didn't want this. I don't want this. I don't want to care or have such an intense attraction to someone I don't know, someone I don't want to know..someone who isn't my fiancee. But I can't help what I feel, and I can't fucking stay away from you.” He snaps. “No matter how hard I try.”

“I never meant for any of this to happen.” You whisper. “I don't know what is happening, I don't know why I'm so attracted to you. It's like there's this.. “ you pause.

“Pull. I feel a pull towards you, and it's like nothing I've ever felt, with anyone.” He finishes your sentence.

Baekhyun stares at you for a moment before he turns, closing all the blinds in your office. He stands in front of the last one for a second, taking a breath. He turns around, his eyes glued to you as he walks to you. “I don't know what to do about you.” He sighs, grabbing the nape of your neck, pulling you closer to him. His lips hover over yours, it's like he's second guessing his choice. You can feel how torn he is between you and Jennie.

He quickly presses his lips to yours, you can feel the static and sparks running through your veins from this kiss, the amount of connection the two of you had was something you'd never thought possible. His warm lips pressed to yours harder, his tongue swept over yours in an urge to deepen the kiss. Your lips parted, letting him in, his tongue swirling around yours as he pressed his body hard to yours, backing you into the wall. Your arms wrap around his neck, your fingers running through his hair as you allow him to dominate the kiss. He doesn't want to waste any time, he hikes up your skirt, his fingers gently trailing over your clothed pussy. He can feel the heat you're radiating for him through the small touch.

“I need you, now.” He pants. He quickly unbuckles his belt, pulling his cock out. He pushes your panties to the side while you lift your leg, placing it on the chair, waiting for him to fuck you. Just as he begins to guide himself in, his phone rings. He groans loudly, pulling it from his pocket to decline the call. He put its down, the tip of his cock dragging against your lips, you were so fucking wet as tou waited for him to be inside you.

Ring. Ring. Ring.

“Fuck.” Baekhyun yells. He picks up his phone again, answering it angrily. “What?”

His face and tone soften. “Shit. When? Yeah okay, I got it.” He says, hanging up the phone. He looks at you with those please forgive me eyes. You drop your leg, fixing your underwear and skirt.

“I'm sorry, Y/N. I really am, I have to go.” He sighs, tucking himself away.

“Yeah, it's fine.” You half smile.

It wasn't fine. He was leaving you with a throbbing clit and the biggest urge for a cock inside you. You watch as he walks out of your office, adjusting himself. You were lucky there was no one else here right now. You hoped that the two of you would pick things up tomorrow.

That never happened. Baekhyun didn't come to work the next day, or the next day, or the next. In fact it had been two weeks since you had seen him, and no one in the office knew where he was. That was until today, when you checked your work emails, seeing a flight confirmation under your name heading to London.

“Um.” You mutter, looking around the office. “Lisa?” You call out. She pops out of nowhere, smiling at your desk.

“What's up?” She asks.

“Why is there a flight to London in my name?” you ask, looking between the email and Lisa.

“Oh shit, no one told you?” She asks. You shake your head, your mouth still slightly ajar.

“Mr. Byun has been in London the last 2 and a half weeks. And now he needs a senior analyst there with him, and you were the one chosen.” She tells you. She glances at the clock. “Oh shit, it's already 3pm, your flight leaves at 6pm. You better get home and pack! Have a great time!” She yells as she walks off. You scramble to grab your belongings, rushing out of the office and hailing the first taxi you saw. He screeched outside your building and you asked him to wait so he could take you to the airport. You busted into your apartment, grabbing your suitcase from under your bed and throwing clothes, underwear, bras, pj's in there along with some shoes. You got all your toiletries together, found your passport, charger and anything else you could quickly think of. You changed your outfit into something more comfortable, you had an almost 14 hour flight ahead of you. Once you closed your suitcase, you locked up your apartment, and rushed down to the waiting taxi. You were sure you had forgotten something, even so, you'd figure it out. You'd never been to London, you were so excited.

You made your flight on time, sitting in first class was boujee. You sat in a pod, the seat turning into a bed if you wanted. You ate some snacks, dinner, watched a couple movies and slept for a while. Once the pilot announced you would be arriving soon, you grabbed the spare work outfit from your carryon and went to the bathroom to change. You tried your best to fix your hair and your face, but it was hard with all your stuff sitting under the plane.

As the plane landed and you got off, you followed the signs through the large London Airport. You found your baggage claim and once you got your bag you went out, only to see a man standing there with your name on a sign.

“Miss Y/N L/N?” He asks. You smile and nod your head. He grabs your luggage, leading you out of the airport.

“We'll get you checked into your hotel room, you can rest for the day, but Mr. Byun will need you tomorrow.” He says, glancing at you from the rear view mirror.

“Thank you.” You say, letting out a big yawn. Fuck, jetlag was already hitting you. Once you got to your room, you took a much needed shower, after that, you had never been so happy to see a bed, you crawled into it immensely. It was almost like crawling into a cloud. You turned on the TV, wrapped yourself up in the blanket and soon you were out.

The next thing you knew, your room phone was ringing loudly. You groggily answer it. “Hello?” you croak.

“Good morning, Miss L/N. This is your 7am wake up call. The car will be leaving in 30 minutes.” She says, before hanging up the phone. You rolled out of bed, grabbing an outfit and your toiletries. You got dressed, did half assed makeup and your hair in record time. You slipped on a pair of shoes that best matched your skirt and shirt, grabbed your bag and room key and left for the elevator. You weren't looking forward to seeing Baekhyun, especially not after what happened last time. What was wrong with you? Why can't you just leave the man alone?

The elevator doors open, and you see Baekhyun standing there, waiting. He nods to you, before walking towards the doors of the hotel. He opens the car door, getting in and leaving it open for you to get in after him.

“Good morning.” He says to you.

“Morning.” You reply back.

Nothing else is said between the two of you. The day passes quickly as you're in and out of the conference room, talking to multiple different people about multiple different things as you and Baekhyun try to close this deal that could take being a data analyst to the next level. There was 1 more day of work ahead of you, but here the two of you were, eating pizza in the conference room at 730pm with a few others. Baekhyun sighs as you all finish up.

“It's getting late.” He says. “We can pick this up tomorrow. Thank you everyone.” When the others leave, you stand there waiting for Baekhyun.

“You can go.” He says to you.

“Oh.” You begin. “Well we came together, so I just assumed..” you trail off.

“Ah right. Let me get my jacket.” He says.

The two of you stand side by side as you wait for the elevator. He stands close to you, but not so close you're touching, just close enough to feel the spark. Your entire body tingles as you step onto the full elevator. As you step on Baekhyun puts his hand on the small of your back, guiding you to the side. He stands behind you, moving closer, his body pressing up against your back. You desperately wanted to turn around and have him take you right then. But you atleast have a little self control.

By the time you had gotten back to the hotel, no words had been spoken between you. You walked into the hotel in silence, waited for this elevator in silence, and rode to the 14th floor in silence. You got off, and went to your room. You get your key card out, Baekhyun stops.

“Good night, Y/N.” He says, as he continues to walk down the hall, he stops as you put your key in your door, turning around. He walks back towards you.

“I'm so fucking tired of fighting this.” He snaps. He pulls you into your room, slamming the door behind him. He kisses you sloppily, it's so needy for the both of you. He grabs your shirt, pulling it over your head before quickly unhooking your bra, tossing it wherever. He drops to his knees, taking your nipple in his mouth, sucking on it before moving to the other one. You let out a moan as your clit throbs for him. He releases your nipple and pulls down your skirt, discarding it along with your underwear. He stands up, tossing you on the bed before he undoes his tie, and takes off his jacket and his shirt. You can see the bulge in his pants growing harder and harder as he eyes up your naked body. He crawls onto the bed, spreading your legs wide. He licks a long strip up your soaked pussy and you scream. He begins to devour you, taking your clit in between his lips as he switches between sucking and flicking the nub with his tongue. He has you twisting beneath him on the bed as he licks and sucks you like his life depended on it.

“Oh my god, Baekhyun. Fuck.” You cry out, making him go faster. He inserts two fingers inside of you, pumping them in and out as he continues slurping up all your juices. You grab your tits, rolling your nipples between your fingers as your orgasm builds. Before you can say anything you cum hard. Your orgasm rips through your body, your scream out in pleasure as Baekhyun slows down his work.

“Holy.” You breathe. “Fuck.”

Baekhyun sits up, smiling as he looks down at you, your chest heaving as you come down from your high. That smile disappears quickly as he stands up, taking his pants off, and boxers. He lets his cock spring free stroking it a few times. You lay there with your legs wide open, ready for him. He sticks his fingers inside of you, using your juices to lube his cock. He lines himself up with you and rams himself inside you. Your eyes roll back as he slams his dick into you over and over again. He grunts loudly, holding your legs in the air ad he fucks you hard, like he's been wanting to do for weeks.

Baekhyun pulls himself out of you, pulling you up onto your knees. He moves behind you, inserting his cock back into your pussy as he reaches around to the front to play with your clit. You tighten yourself around him as he thrusts into you, while his fingers work your clit. It doesn't take you long to cum again, this time soaking his cock.

“Fuck baby.” He moans. “You feel so fucking good.” He pushes you down, your face now on the bed as he picks up his pace. He rams his cock deep inside you as his fingers dig into your hips. You cry out and moan so loudly, you were sure you were going to get complaints, but you didn't care.

“Right there.” You scream. “Yes! Fuck, right fucking there.”

“Does my cock feel good baby?”

“So fucking good. oh my god.” You scream.

Baekhyun grabs onto a clump of your hair, pulling hard as he rams into you a few more times before he finally cums, his vision goes blurry as his cum seeps deep inside you.

He pulls out of you, collapsing on the bed beside you. The two of you lay there, smiling at each other as you try to catch your breath. Baekhyun reaches over, caressing your face, you close your eyes. You only meant to for a second, but you were so tired you must have fallen asleep. You woke up the next morning, looking over at the spot Baekhyun had laid before and he wasn't there. You look around the room and see him sitting in the corner in a chair, watching you.

“Are you okay?” You whisper.

Baekhyun looks down, his fingers twisting the couples ring on his finger. His shoulders are hunched as he takes a deep breath. “I uh.. I don't know.” He answers.

Your stomach sinks.

“I know you love her. You've been together for so long it makes sense.. but what if.. what if I'm your soulmate?” You ask.

He looks up at you, he's confused until you can see it click on his face. He stands up, kissing you quickly before he puts some clothes on.

“I need to talk to her.” He says, running out of the room. You get yourself dressed and ready for the day, you had only this morning to finish everything up, your flight leaves this evening.

This was the hardest morning you had ever had. Your eyes kept wandering towards Baekhyun. You tried to fight it but he just looked so fucking good. He had a smile on his face, he was laughing. You'd never seen him so carefree before. Anytime he caught you gawking, he secretly winked at you, making your insides burn with desire.

“I'm just going to go to the restroom.” You say, clearing your throat. You use the bathroom, wash your hands and walk out but not before a hand grabs you, pulling you down another hall.

Baekhyun leans closer to you but you stop him. “Wait. I've been needing to know.” You begin. “Did you.. end things?” You ask him.

“Yes I did. I ended it.” He confirms. He actually did it?

“I've been wanting to do this all day.” Baekhyun groans, crashing his lips to yours. He presses himself against you, making you moan into his mouth.

“Just fuck me, right here.” You gasp, his lips kissing all over your neck.

He chuckles. “Now, now, baby. You have to be a good girl for me.” He groans, tempted to just do it.

“Mr Byun?” You hear him being called. He sighs loudly, releasing himself from you, straightening up himself. He walks around the corner, taking the person calling him away so you can sneak out too.

Once the clock hit 2pm, you and Baekhyun were out of there. Your flight left at 5pm, so there was still time for you to check out of the hotel and make it to the airport. The two of you sat in your seats on the plane, and you drifted off to sleep for almost the entire flight. As you and Baekhyun collect your luggage, he grabs your hand, intertwining your fingers as you walk out of the airport.

“I have to go the other way.” You giggle, trying to release your hand from his. “I need to get a cab.”

“What? Absolutely not. I'll drive you home.” He smiles. He puts both your luggage in the back seat of his car as you get into the passenger seat. As Baekhyun drives towards your apartment, his hand rests on your thigh. You feel like you're going to explode if he doesn't touch you soon. Smiling to yourself, you reach over, placing your hand on his thigh. Every second you moved it up slightly, until you were finally on top of his cock. You gently massage him, making him groan.

“You're making It hard for me to concentrate.” He breathes.

“Oh yes, it's definitely getting hard.” You grin.

Baekhyun stops the car outside your building, running around to your side, opening the door and pulling you out of the car and your suitcase. Baekhyun's hands grope your body as you try to unlock your door. Once it opens, he slams it shut behind you, pinning you against the door. His mouth is on yours, you're both pulling clothes off of each other, so desperate to feel each other. Baekhyun slides two fingers into your pussy, making you cry out as he thrusts his fingers in and out.

“you're so fucking wet.” He moans, stroking his cock with your wetness. You pull him to the couch, pushing him down to sit. You climb on top of him, sinking yourself down on his cock. You gasp as he stretches you out. You begin to rock, grinding yourself on him as his hands grope your breasts. Your hands run through his hair, pulling him closer to you, his hands move down to your ass, making you bounce up and down on him.

“Shit.” He cries out, you squeeze your pussy around him as you feel your orgasm coming fast.

“Cum for me baby.” He says, gripping your ass tighter, bouncing you faster.

“Fuck.” You cry, your orgasm exploding through your body. Baekhyun keeps holding you up as he thrusts himself inside you, pounding himself into you, desperately needing to release himself inside you.

He cums inside you, letting you soak up everything he's given you. You sit there for a moment, catching your breath. You slowly get off of him, your legs wobbling.

“Come on, let's get cleaned up.” He chuckles, letting you lead him to the bathroom.

A few hours later you were begging Baekhyun not to leave but he kept telling you he had things he needed to do.

“I promise, after our little victory party tomorrow, we will go on a date and I'll stay all night and all day the next day.” He smiles. You pout but agree.

“See you tomorrow?” You ask.

“See you tomorrow.” He smiles, placing a small kiss on your lips before leaving.

You were so unbelievably fucking happy.

The next evening, you were surrounded by coworkers as you celebrated landing the deal that you and Baekhyun had been in London for. Champagne in your glass, you looked good, and you could not wait for Baekhyun to show up. You were talking to Lisa when she mentioned that Baekhyun was here. You turned around, a smile plastered on your face until you saw him. In he walked, fingers intertwined with Jennie. A big smile plastered on her face, their couple rings flashing under the lights.

His words from just a few days ago replay in your head.

“Yes I did. I ended it.”

[sizebrained]

It's So Hot, Can We Go To The Pool? Part 1

Ok, this is the very first thing I've ever shared in terms of G/t writing so be kind.

I hit Tumblr's max length every post, sorry not sorry. I retconned this from when I first wrote it to make Ben bigger than I originally thought. Muwahaha. Also Hazel's haircolor.

It's meant to be an intro that takes place in the middle when everyone's dynamics were already established.

Content Warning: Adult themes, somewhat suggestive romantic/sexual interests. Mentions of nudity, war, death, danger, terror, injury, PTSD, and panic attacks. But also fluff.

***

The condo was eerily quiet, but that suited Ben just fine. The air inside it, however, felt heavy and still. Ben could do without that on such a hot July day. The air inside was so heavy and still because the building’s air conditioning system was broken, and it was supposed to be brand new.

“Top of the line” the realtor had told him. “Top of the line” was doing absolutely nothing for him now.

The single oversized ceiling fan in the main living space helped, but not much when the air was this humid. Ben looked up at the fan whirring as fast as it could manage to try and cool the air. He guessed that if he were to jump, he could slap it to help it along.

But he figured that he would more likely just break it, given the state of the “top of the line” air conditioning. And he couldn’t jump like he used to anyway. Well actually he just wasn't sure…

He really missed moving his body like he used to before the accident. Almost half a year on crutches was awful. But his older sister, Sam, told him that he shouldn’t be pushing himself.

She insisted that he needed a few more months of physical therapy with her before he tried to pull any stunts. He figured jumping up to slap a ceiling fan counted as a stunt. Especially one that was hanging from the ceiling 10 feet up.

But standing 7'3" inches tall, it didn't seem that high to Ben. With his reach and vertical leap, Ben knew he could have probably done it a year ago. But that was before the car accident. His basketball days are over now thanks to that wreck.

The thought made him bend over and absentmindedly rub his left knee cap with a sigh. It was like he was developing some kind of nervous tick.

His long fingers took turns gently tracing his surgery scars. Even with the surgeon’s best efforts, Ben still thought he looked like they had used a lawnmower on him. It made him self-conscious about his body, which he already had enough of before adding surgery scars to the mix. His lower back, shoulders, arms, and some parts of his legs already took the brunt of his big body's rapid expansion over the years leaving stretch marks from his growth. At least the stitches from his latest procedure had dissolved and were no longer itching him.

Lost in his own train of thought, Ben had carelessly bent down at the waist to play with his scars. This made the massive college student’s whole upper body tilt forward at an angle.

“Mind what you are doing, please!!!” shouted a small voice from his left shoulder. It was said in a gentle tone, instead of annoyed as someone would expect given the result of Ben's thoughtless movement. Something about her British accent always made Ben think Mary Poppins was living with him.

The voice came from a tiny, young looking woman who was shorter than any one of Ben’s long fingers. Even his thumb was bigger than her. She was standing with the front of her body facing the profile of his face many times larger than her own.

Dangling away from his body, the tiny figure was clutching the shoulder fabric of the arm closest to her in the grip of one tiny hand. She was pulling on it hard enough so that the top of the cotton fabric actually lifted up off of his skin.

Ben was much darker compared to her own pale complexion, made even lighter by so many years indoors. And she stood just over 3 and a half inches tall making Ben 30 times her height.

She shifted her position and braced her feet flat against the front of the massive human’s collarbone. A long tail swished back and forth vigorously behind her, helping her steady and balance.

One hand came to rest on her hip as if to emphasize her point. She looked like she was purposefully striking a pose. It was as if she was a great pirate captain measuring the wind speed for a ship sailing across the open ocean.

But instead of such a majestic scene, the reality was far less adventurous. They were both simply waiting together for Ben’s sister and Hazel’s sibling, named Cob, to return from the store. Hazel had been perched on the top of Ben's one shoulder and rather than climb to his back, she decided to hang on till he was upright agian. The plan was for all of them to try to go to the nearly empty, and supposedly luxury, building’s pool. Ben and his passenger were a terribly sweaty and annoyed mess.

Ben still hadn’t adjusted to moving differently when he she was on him, and he worried that he may never at this rate. It put more effort onto her to compensate for his lack of continued awareness, but she didn’t seem to mind.

She relished the chance to have a human to climb on again after Mary and Jack’s passing, and Ben was like the Mount Everest of humans. She enjoyed the challenge.

Given how nimble she was, there was never a real risk of her falling from her perch. Instead, she was more concerned with his obsession over his body.

It was true that the tiny woman was very annoyed today, and her tail swished in a way that looked it. But she was not annoyed at Ben, almost never at Ben. It was becoming harder to ignore or admit, but he was occupying more space for her and not just in a physical sense. It was the heat. It was never hot like this back home. And even though she’d lived in America for most of her life now, she always considered England her real home. And it never got hot like this there.

From her spot dangling on Ben’s left shoulder, she took a look again at his knee, way, way down. Scars were nothing new for her. She’d seen far worse after four years in a war hospital during what would eventually be called World War II. But Ben had kept it wrapped in bandages at her suggestion to keep himself from itching and scratching at the sutures.

She was amazed to learn they’d invented stitches that would dissolve. She wished they had those back when she was nursing. Having to remove them once a wound had healed was novel for Hazel, at first. But by the end of the war, she reckoned that she had cut through and removed hundreds of yards of stitching from humans. She could always do it far quicker than Mary, the human nurse and her companion, ever could. It was a skill that gave her a sense of pride. That she could do so little else at her size in such a place made her relish some superior skill.

Mary, ever stoic, simply reminded the tiny woman with a tail that the stitches were a lot bigger and easier compared to her. So she shouldn’t get too big of a head over it. Still the human nurse was glad for all the help she could get on her shifts in the war hospital, no matter how small the help may be.

Seeing Ben’s healed scars now in the open, she was interested by how different the angles of the incisions were compared to what they would have back then. Although if pilots like Mary's husband, Jack, had suffered injuries like Ben -- they would have had just amputated.

She was surprised that she hadn’t noticed it before, but then again he had kept them covered. Plus, Ben’s size had the habit of sometimes making her freeze up and miss minor details.

That he had such an effect on her was the only thing that did annoy her about the enormous human. She knew he would never hurt her. Generations of her kind had ingrained in instinct into her, she felt a constant warning that Ben was too big and must be a threat.

The hours Ben spent during their first meeting proved the opposite, despite his size. He could also be incredibly delicate. It took so long getting her unstuck from that glue trap and he was so flustered and gentlemanly about it.

He made joke after joke about the situation to make both of them feel better. And he was more embarrassed by having to, ultimately, cut off some of her clothes with a pair of scissors than she had been.

Nudity, at least her own, never really phased her. That it so flustered him to see her in a state of nature was all the evidence she ever needed to trust him. Although as her feelings about him changed that started to as well.

But still, he was just so…big. It was like the word was invented with Ben in mind. Her natural impulses to flee had certainly gotten better with more time and exposure to him. But he was still so utterly gigantic even when compared to any humans she’d previously encountered in her life. And he was so fast, it reminded Hazel of herself.

The Professor always hobbled around with a cane, and Mary wasn’t the most graceful human she’d seen. Mary’s husband, Jack, who was an American pilot during the war, also moved around rather slowly and deliberately having lost both a leg and his eyesight during the war. She still marveled at how Ben could move like that being so enormous, even when he had been on crutches for most of the past several months with his injury.

“Oh Hazel! Sorry! Sorry sorry sorry…” Ben blinked furiously out of his own thoughts. Replying quickly and sheepishly, he gave up on touching his reconstructed knee and stood back upright.

This pleased the little, tailed woman named Hazel, but she found herself on the backfoot again when Ben brought one huge up to his left shoulder as if to catch her. He opened his hand to extend his fingers, straightening them out.

The span of each of his hands from the thumb to the pinky was four times Hazel’s size. His hand got measured once to potentially be drafted to the NBA. He thought it was weird to get measured like he was a farm animal.

Hazel didn't care about his exact dimensions. Just that, however many inches the hand was, it was large enough to block her whole view.

Hazel’s sharp featured face fell under the shadow of his hand as Ben made a literal wall for the small woman, more as reassurance for himself. She wasn’t going to fall, and she especially wasn’t going to fall now that he had stood up straight again leveling out his shoulder. She resumed her former position on top of it.

It had been decades since she had lost her footing, and even then it wasn’t her fault. Hazel sighed as she waited for Ben to figure out for himself why she would find his well meaning gesture bothersome.

She could have just told him, but she took her old Professor’s old approach of a Socratic method, favoring questions over providing answers as a form of instruction.

She took the time to remember the last time she had fallen. A bomb the size of a normal human, not Ben, went through the roof and several upper floors of the makeshift hospital’s building. Then it exploded. It was the loudest thing she had ever heard. Her ears rang for hours afterwards.

Lately as he started acting more like what she imagined his old self was like before the accident, she thought Ben was getting close to being the second loudest thing she’d ever heard. Even his whispered apology just now was enough to make his voice rumble through the whole of her body. It was especially noticeable when she was this close to his throat.

Every time the giant human spoke while she was this close, it sent vibrations up through the soles of her feet into her whole body. No human she’d encountered, not even Mary’s husband, had quite the same effect. Hazel always noticed the absence of it when talking with other humans or her family. Now that she was used to it, she found she would yearn for the sensation.

For a human, Ben was just so…so much. It was concerning at times. All humans were large but something about Ben’s enormous size was especially noticeable today. Conceptually, she understood what being over 7 feet tall meant. But for all intents and purposes, he might as well have told her he was 100 feet tall like the old oak trees on the Professor’s country estate.

Sometimes Hazel felt like she was a human who had been accustomed to riding horses their entire life, to all of a sudden find their preferred stead was replaced with an elephant.

Hazel had only seen an elephant once when Mary had taken her to a circus in the late 1950’s. It was the biggest creature she had ever seen. Ben was the second biggest, followed by his absent sister. That Ben’s sister had still not returned with Hazel’s own sibling, who had accompanied the human shopping, also annoyed Hazel right now.

Maybe it was just the heat making her snippy. She was annoyed at herself, that her inconvenience overtook her patience. She couldn’t stand to wait in front of his mammoth hand any longer.

“It’s fine. It’s fine. Just be more mindful please. Remember, you have a passenger. And I appreciate the gesture but it’s truly unnecessary…” She chastised him tenderly.

To Ben, even when she looked mad or annoyed she never sounded like it. He loved her accent, except that it made her sound older than she looked. Hazel reached out casually and patted the closest spot of his palm a few times in reassurance. Ben could just barely feel it. Hazel’s own outstretched hand wouldn’t even cover one of his fingernails. The boy was just so…big.

Ben lowered his own hand, closing his fingers inwards towards his palm tightening them so his knuckles cracked. Another tick of his. Hazel hated when he did that.

Hazel let go of his shirt and took a few steps back towards the center of his shoulder again. She wiped her brow feeling as if her body was making its own pool while they waited. Even the bandana she used to contain her long curly hair, and keep it out of her face, was soaked through. It was also exceptionally frizzy in this heat and humidity. The state of her hair also annoyed her.

Hazel pulled off her bandana causing her hair to nearly stand on end when it was released. Ben thought it made her look like a dandelion about to blow away if there was a breeze. But he dared not share that thought with her and risk annoying her further.

Now on the top of Ben’s once again flat shoulder, she pulled up the sliver of fabric that rested across his powerful tendon to pat her face dry.

“Pardon me.” Hazel said while Ben watched in silent amusement. It was nice to see her be less formal than he was used to her being. The heat must really be getting to her.

Hazel wrung out her bandana several times with her strong hands, the droplets barely registering as they fell onto Ben’s enormous shirt. She shook it out a few times, before rewrapping it around her head with a loud, haughty huff. It was still damp. The annoyances seemed to never end for her today.

“It is just that…I cannot see a thing when you do that you know?” She said with a slight upturn of her chin to peer at the side of his face.

“Have they returned yet?” she asked while trying to stand on her tiptoes to look out the window for herself as if she wasn’t already high enough.

“Nope. Not that I can see…” Ben said slowly.

Ben took a turn peering down through the window. The kitchen’s large single pane of glass over the sink gave him a clear view of most of the building’s parking lot. He realized that the motion made him start to lean again and he raised his hand again instinctively.

But he caught himself and lowered it quickly before he was verbally slapped by Hazel, if you could even call her admonitions something that harsh. Hazel saw him correct himself and nodded ever so slightly in silent approval.

Sam almost always parked in one of the handicap spots when she took Ben’s car. The novelty of getting to park so close to entrances spoke to her lazy core. It was quite a source of contention between them with Ben rightfully worried about someone who may actually need to use a handicap spot.

Sam promised that she would only park in a handicap space when there was an abundance of them, but that wasn’t enough for Ben. Hazel thought they could bicker over it for some time and it seemed like Sam did it on purpose.

The last time they fought over it, Hazel turned out to be correct. She was doing it on purpose in the hopes of forcing him to drive himself finally. Sam finally snapped at her little brother that if he was so concerned about her doing it, then he needed to start driving again so she couldn’t do it.

It was Sam’s unsubtle way of trying to force him to get back into a car again. But Ben had refused to even get into a car ever since his accident. Even the elevator made him jumpy now. Despite being on crutches for several months, he would still painstakingly hop up the stairs with the crutches tucked under an arm rather than feel trapped in a metal box again.

There was an entire row of more than a dozen handicap spots right in the front of Ben’s new luxury condo building. Sam usually left it parked in one of them, hoping to lure her brother into it again somehow.

As far as Ben knew, there was only one occupant who needed it because of her wheelchair. She was a rather nice woman in her late 30’s who lived four levels below him. Ben thinks her name was Susan...maybe. He was terrible with names but always remembered faces. His sister was the same, but just called everyone “Babe” to as a workaround, even with him.

Ben saw that his neighbor, maybe Susan, had parked in her preferred handicap spot right next to the ramp into the building. The rest were empty, meaning Ben’s sister and Hazel’s sibling Cob had yet to return.

“Is the store not just two of your blocks away from here? Could they not have just walked?” Hazel asked annoyed.

She still wasn't used to how quick a walk somewhere could be when she hitched a ride on Ben and guessed his older sister was nearly as fast. Sam wasn’t as big as Ben, but she wasn’t that much smaller.

Ben turned his head to look at Hazel perched on the wide expanse of his left shoulder. He could just make her out in his peripheral vision. If he took a second to really focus he could even make out her little features.

He was amazed by how strikingly beautiful she looked. Few of the human teachers that he had seemed like they could rival her knowledge looked like her. Although he guessed Hazel had a bit of an unfair advantage being over a hundred years old. She'd probably kill at trivia...except for any sports categories. But if she was on the same team as Sam, they'd be unstoppable.

Right now, Ben thought she looked annoyed. And sweaty. But he was too. Ben pinched the front of his tank top between two fingers and pulled it away from his body. He then did it again over and over so it started to flap. The flapping wafted cooler air up and down his body. When the air hit Hazel like a light breeze she smiled in grateful relief.

Ben felt a sense of accomplishment over the change in her face. He would leap on any chance he could get to make her more comfortable with him. Hopefully, this helped make up for his hand mistake earlier.

Ben pulled out his phone from the pocket in his shorts with his other hand to check his texts. He saw no missed calls or texts from his sister and only his several unanswered ones left. She always left him on “read.” Each text asked what was taking so long with increasing impatience.

“She probably ran into someone from work or they’re still out joyriding. You know Cob never turns down the chance to ride in a…”

Ben was about to say car, when he was interrupted by the familiar sound of his own pulling in faster than it should into the parking lot. Thankfully, the parking lot was almost always empty.

Out of the 50 plus units in the building, less than 10 had been bought so far leaving the rest of the building unoccupied. It meant there was lots of space in the parking lot, which Sam fully intended to really explore.

Ben and Hazel watched as Sam curved left then right, finally turning in a tight circle several times that left tire marks on the asphalt. Relieved from Ben’s shirt breeze, it was Hazel turn to see Ben be the one who looked annoyed for a change.

The car finally parked in one of the many handicap spots causing Ben to grumble in disapproval and shake Hazel’s whole body so much that her teeth chattered. Sam emerged then walked to open back of the car and pick up several large shopping bags in both hands.

“Oh that’s why…they went fucking shopping. Again. She was just there yesterday what could she possibly need now.” Ben said, agitated, still flapping his shirt for Hazel. In fact, he sped up the motion a bit making the artificial breeze sway Hazel’s clothes and hair.

Even from the 10th floor, Ben could tell Sam was wearing a bathing suit now. But she had left in shorts and a t-shirt. She was also wearing a wide brimmed straw hat like she was going to the beach. Hazel saw them now as well, but she could not tell where Cob was holding onto Sam. She guessed maybe the hat?

“Language!” Hazel said, lifting her leg to stomp a foot down on his shoulder in protest. Hazel thought she may never get used to the casual swearing of this generation of humans.

Ben only made another grumbling noise in acknowledgement, shaking her whole body up to the teeth again. He wondered how much of a bill she had run up on his credit card. Not that it mattered after the settlement, probably, but like the handicap parking it was the principle of it. Sam seemed to find excuses to buy all kinds of junk when it was his money.

Ben turned his body slowly away from the window and stopped flapping his shirt. The shirt breeze was replaced by the rustle of wind sweeping past his should as as he took long barefoot strides across the condo.

“Do you think they still want to go to the pool? That took longer than I thought it would.” Hazel asked him while peering over her shoulder at a clock on the wall in the kitchen.

She steadied herself, bending her knees slightly and swaying along with Ben as he walked. Her tail resumed swishing again, helping her keep her balance while he moved.

“Yea but would you and Cob really want to go down to the pool again?” Ben asked concern, sneaking a glance at her on his shoulder.

“I don’t love the idea of you just floating in a body of water that big or sitting on the ledge. One of those birds could get you.” Ben said ominously.

He walked over to his front door. On the wall next to it was a large monitor and several buttons. He pressed one button to buzz his sister into the building. She had his key and he didn’t need to do it, but pressing the button activated a camera that filled up the wall monitor with a view of the lobby.

Ben and Hazel saw her bounding up the flight of stairs in the lobby two at a time towards the elevators. She looked like the Grinch stealing Whoville’s Christmas presents in the night. 

“I could just get a big bowl and put some ice cubes in there for the two of you while Sam and I go down.” Ben offered thinking out loud.

Hazel’s annoyed expression returned. The idea of floating in one of his large, used popcorn bowls was more unappealing than continuing to sweat in the condo. Cob would probably love it though.

Ben unlocked the door while he spoke. Then he took a few steps back to rest his butt on the wide back of the sectional couch. The sectional took up most of the living room. He bought the biggest one they made so that Ben could lay on it fully outstretched wherever he wanted.

The movers who delivered it were expecting a place with lots of people or kids. Instead, they were shocked to see just one giant person on crutches who had to bend down so that he could see them under the top of the door frame. Ben couldn’t wait for them to finish and go. One of them was a big fan.

One half of the couch faced the tv while the other faced a wall of windows and the wide balcony after that. Ben crossed his arms over his chest, waiting on the back of the couch and facing the front door with the balcony behind him. He was trying to look as annoyed as he could muster. Hazel missed the breeze from his shirt. She hoped he may resume flapping his shirt to make it return.

“Thank you, but no I do not think I will be going popcorn swimming today. Do you not think that one of those large bags your sister is hauling up here contains some ingenious item that will allow Cob and I to fully enjoy the pool with the two of you.” Hazel asked with a sarcastic emphasis on “ingenious.”

Like the popcorn bowl idea she knew they often meant well. But Ben and Sam could often do or suggest things that were demeaning and patronizing for someone her age. It didn’t seem to bother Cob as much. Hopefully their tagging along and input helped Sam buy something that stood a chance of being useful.

If it wasn’t for Sam’s shopping trips, Ben’s new space would likely still be as empty and filled with echoes as when he first moved in. While Ben was annoyed by her spending, Hazel appreciated the clutter from Sam’s trips. Hazel loathes nothing more than clean, wide open spaces with nowhere to hide and no human objects to use for improvisation.

***

End Pt 1

[rachelbethhines]

PotP Ch 55 - Blizzards, Blackbirds, and Bargains: Part 1

Snow.

Varian hated snow.

It wasn't always such. In his youth, he had loved winter. Snow days were meant for play. He'd make hot cocoa, ice skate, pick frost berries, and build snow forts for snowball battles with the local kids. Once he invented a machine that helped carve ice sculptures... until it caught on fire and melted them all.

But that was before the amber.

Varian could tell that it was snowing before he ever even poked his head out from under the covers.

First, the cold morning air; unusually cold for San Fransokyo. Then there was the soft diffused light from the frosted window pane shining in his bedroom. There was also the quiet stillness; near unheard of in the big city. Finally there was the fiamiler fresh scent of ice. It lacked the undertones of fir and pine that he was used to, but he could still tell.

A look outside confirmed his worst fears.

Especially when Ruddiger came through the window and shook the white powdery stuff off his fur.

Varian groaned, kicked off the covers, and made his way to the kitchen.

----------------

"What are you hunting for?" Aunt Cass asked with a yawn.

"I guess we don't have any tripe, do we?" Varian asked in kind as he rummaged in the cupboards.

"Ummm... pretty sure we don't. Why do we need tripe?"

"It's snowing."  

Aunt Cass blinked, unsure of what the connection was. "Snowing?"

"I used to make tripe stew on snow days." Varian explained. "It's just easy and warms the castle up."

"Oh... well... we don't have any tripe, b-but we do have some bacon." She opened the fridge and started rummaging around. "Maybe we can improvise and make some bean and bacon soup instead? Start a new tradition, huh?"

She retrieved the bacon and smiled wide as she offered her suggestion to Varian.

Varian half-heartedly returned her smile and took the meat from her.

Aunt Cass frowned at his lack of enthusiasm.

She placed a hand on his shoulder, pausing him in his hunt for the beans. "Hey, I know sometimes you get homesick, and that's okay. Everything is different here, and it's a readjustment. But If you need anything you know you can talk to me."

Varian shook his head. "It's not that. "

Aunt Cass's brow furrowed in confusion, but rather than explain, Varian just said, "The bacon's a good idea. Tripe is too chewy anyway." and went back to digging around in the pantry.

----------------

Honey Lemon watched the pink puff balls on her boots bounce up and down as she gingerly stepped off the trolley. The railed carts were the only safe way to travel in this weather as most people in San Fansokyo didn’t own cars with snow tires, including Gogo, who stepped off of the trolley after her. They spotted Fred waving at them both from across the street as they walked over towards the Lucky Cat; very carefully, so as to not slip on any ice.

“Hey, glad you made it!” Tadashi greeted them, as he held a large snowball in his hand. He placed it on top of an even bigger snowball and he and Hiro both started patting extra snow along the seam where the two met.

“We’re building a snow sculpture of Baymax.” Fred explained as he joined them.

Just then Wasabi opened the door to the cafe. “I found the eyes!” He called out as he carried a small cardboard box. Baymax shuffled along behind him.

“What did you get?” Hiro asked him.

“Chocolate covered coffee beans!” He proclaimed as he pulled out a small container of the treats.

“Oooh, I want some!” Fred exclaimed and practically crawled over Wasabi to rummage in the box he held.

Honey Lemon laughed. “You better not eat all of Varian’s stash. He might be tearing the cafe apart looking for those later.” She gently warned.

“Where is Varian anyway?” Gogo asked.

Tadashi shrugged. “Upstairs. He’s been in the kitchen all morning with Aunt Cass.”

“I’ll go get him.” Honey Lemon offered and skipped inside.

Her glasses started fogging up as soon she entered the much warmer cafe. She paused to take them off and rubbed them clean on her matching pink sweater. This only got lint on them, so she wiped them on her jeans instead. Satisfied, she put them back on only to find Aunt Cass coming downstairs to greet her.

“Hi,” She sang out. “I’m glad you and Gogo made it here safe.”

“Hi Aunt Cass. Yeah, the roads weren’t too bad and the trolleys are still running. I thought I’d ask Varian to join us. Is he still upstairs?”

“He is, he’s in the kitchen, however...” Aunt Cass sighed as she poured herself a coffee. “I don’t know how much he’ll want to get out. He’s been pretty shut in all day. Buuuut, if anyone can encourage him to come outside, it’ll probably be you.”

She gave her a sweet smile before heading outside herself to check on the rest of the teens.

Honey Lemon watched her go with a frown. Varian must be in one of his moods again, and no one ever quite knew what to expect when Varian became gloomy. She also didn’t know what she could do that Aunt Cass probably hadn’t already tried.

Still, she took a deep breath and made her way up the stairs.

She found Varian in the upstairs kitchen just like everyone had said. He was sitting at the table reading a large leather bound tome, while a pot on the stove was boiling away. Honey Lemon recognized the book. It was the fantastical grimoire that held the secrets to the magical portal that would send him home. The thought of which filled her with dread, but best not to bring it up now.

“It smells good.” She said with a smile as she came up from behind him.

Varian looked up from the spellbook, startled by her voice, and turned to look at her. “Oh yeah, umm, Aunt Cass and I are making bean and bacon soup. Sorry, I didn’t know you were coming, or I would have made you a vegan option.”

“It’s okay, I can just pick around the bacon.” She shrugged as she lifted the lid off of the pot to look at the soup. “Beans sound like a good supper to me.”

“It’s chicken stock as the base.” Varian warned. “Here, I think we still have some dried beans. I’ll just make you a small pot of your own.”

“Oh, you don’t need to go to any trouble on my account.”

“What trouble?” He asked as he pulled out the bag of dried beans. “All you do is put it in a pot and let it boil for a while. Look to see if there’s any vegetable stock in the cabinet over there.”

Honey Lemon followed his suggestion and quickly found the container of stock next to the other broths. She poured some into another small pot, along with the beans, as Varian started raiding the spice cabinet.

“What do you want in it?” He asked. “Shallot, a bit of celery salt, oooh, how about some chili power for a little kick, huh?”

He gave her a Cheshire smile and waved the plastic shaker full of pepper at her.

She only shrugged in response. “Anything is good with me.”

Varian took this as permission to experiment and pulled out a whole bunch of spices. He happily went to work seasoning the small pot of what was quickly becoming vegan chili.

“What do you think we should have with our soup?” He asked. “Aunt Cass thinks we should just toast the leftover baguettes downstairs and make croutons, but I think we should make some fresh bread.”

“Why not both?” Honey Lemon awkwardly asked. She didn’t like being caught in the middle of any sort of disagreement, even a mild one like this.

“I like the way you think.” Varian agreed, and Honey Lemon felt relief wash over her. Varian didn’t seem to be in a bad mood at all. Perhaps what had bothered him earlier today had been forgotten, or maybe he had worked through it.

“Shall we go for a sourdough, or a dark rye... Oh hey, I’ve never made cornbread before. That’d be fun. Something new?” Varian gave her a wide smile and Honey Lemon returned it.

“I’m down for something new.” She agreed. However, as Varian started to gather up the ingredients she decided to press on with why she was here. “Speaking of fun. Everyone is outside building a snowman. You wanna join in?”

Varian paused in shifting the cornmeal and started to stare blankly at the opposite wall. Then he shook his head and went back to cooking.

“No, it’s alright. You go on ahead, and I’ll just keep fixing our dinner.”

“Well... dinner’s not for hours.” Honey Lemon nervously suggested. She could feel the change in Varian’s mood the way one would feel the temperature drop. “Why don’t you take a break and do this later?”

Varian paused in what he was doing and turned to face her with a cold frown.

“I.. don’t like snow,” He said carefully. “I would rather not.”

He then turned away from her and placed the mixing bowl on the stand mixture. “You can go on ahead though. Y'all have fun.”

He said this in a much lighter tone, but Honey Lemon couldn’t dismiss the sudden change in attitude. Especially not with the grimoire still lying there on the table.

“Is... is everything alright?” She asked.

“Yeah... yeah, everything is fine. Snow is... just not my thing.” He lied to her. “After all, it’s not that special when you get it regularly every winter.”

“Do... do you get a lot of snow in Corona?” She timidly asked as she placed her hands behind her back.

Varian finally turned to look at her, and he gave her the most peculiar stare; as if he was simultaneously seeing all of her, and through her at once, looking past her at some distant memory that she wasn’t privy to.

“We get far too much.” He said ominously, and Honey Lemon didn’t want to know what he meant by that.

She sighed, accepting defeat. “Well I thought I would just ask... promise me though... that you won’t stay cooped up in the kitchen at least. You’ll come down stairs for hot cocoa, right?”

Varian gave her a small, sad smile. “Alright, I promise.”

“Okay,” She nodded.”I’ll come and get you when we do that. Sounds good?”

“Yeah, I’ll see ya then. In the meantime I’ll fix the rest of dinner.”

Honey Lemon pursed her lips and gave a tight smile before awkwardly turning to leave. She did however turn back to look at Varian one final time before heading downstairs. His back was turned towards her now as he continued to make the cornbread. Her eye landed on the spellbook again, and for one brief moment she wished she could throw the thing in the trash.

----------------

The storm only got worse throughout the day. By the time lunch rolled around all the roads were completely closed, with announcements that the trolleys would soon stop running and shut down early for the day, and the news was advising people to stay at home.

Everyone agreed therefore to an impromptu sleepover in the living room.

Board games, movies, hot cocoa, and pillow forts with pillow fights helped to pass the time away.

Aunt Cass yawned as she finished handing out the last of the blankets. "Man, this snow day has worn me out. I'm heading to bed early. Just don't stay up too late. Good Night."

"Night Aunt Cass." The chorus of college kids rang out behind her.

"I'm with Aunt Cass," Wasabi yawned himself as he laid down on his makeshift pallet on the floor. "I'm pooped."

His beauty rest  was short-lived when Rudigger crawled up on his chest, circled around once, and then curled up to sleep.

Wasabi frowned before picking the wild creature up and putting him down on the floor. "Hey now. I am not a pillow"

He then readjusted his sleep mask and laid back down again, only for Ruddiger to ignore his warning and perch upon the scientist's chest once more.

Wasabi's ensuing battle with the raccoon for dominance was ignored by everyone.

"Well, I for one think we shouldn't end any good sleepover without ghost stories." Tadashi mischievously smiled as he flopped on the couch.

"Varian's got a good vampire story to tell." Hiro chimed in. "You know, that one you told during the camping trip."

Varian, who was already laying down on his own pallet on the floor, heaved a sigh. "I'm not really up for stories. I'm pretty tired as well."

Gogo frowned. "Hey, is everything alright? "

"Yeah, you've been pretty bummed out all day." Fred added bluntly.

"It... it's nothing." Varian insisted. "I'm just not a fan of the cold."

And with that he pulled the cover up higher and turned on his side. Everyone shared knowing looks as he pretended to sleep, but all thought it best not to press the matter.

"Well, I guess it's up to me then." Tadashi sighed as a knowing smile played on his lips. "How about the one about…”

----------------

Tadashi was midway through his ghost story when the power went out. 

Varian had only been half paying attention but his eyes snapped open and he bolted upright at the sudden darkness. 

He vaguely heard screaming, but he couldn't tell if it was just himself or the others. 

“Ha. ha. Very funny Tadashi.” Wasabi yelled into the darkness sarcastically. 

“It wasn't me.” The other boy protested. 

That's when Baymax’s chest lit up and produced a weather report. 

“The news is reporting temporary power outages across the city. Citizens are recommended to stay inside and keep warm while the electric company works on the lines. Power should be back shortly.” The robot helpfully informed. “In the meantime I will activate my built-in heater.”

Varian could see a few of the teens make their way over to the glowing automaton and snuggle up to it. Others wrapped their blankets around them tighter. 

All except Hiro, who had made his way over to him. 

“Hey, are you okay?” He asked in a low voice. 

Not low enough to Varian’s liking however, as he put on his usual front. “Yeah I'm fine.” 

“I didn't think Tadashi’s story was that scary.” Gogo added, commenting on everyone else's earlier screams. 

“Just because you're not afraid of anything Gogo..” Honey Lemon started but Fred interrupted her. 

“Nuh uh… She’s afraid of leprechauns, remember?” 

“Leprechauns?” Tadashi snorted. 

Gogo rolled her eyes. “It's from that stupid movie that came out when we were kids. I was five. Okay.” 

“Oh Unlucky Charms!” Tadashi nodded recognizing the film. “Okay, I can see why that would creep a kid out. Not me of course… but…” 

“Oh stop lying.” Hiro needled his brother. “I know what you're afraid of.” 

“Oh come on… no… not that.” Tadashi begged. 

“He’s weirded out by the Share Bears.” 

Tadashi groaned and literally everyone else burst out laughing. Everyone but Varian. 

“Bears can be scary.” 

“No he means the Share Bears.” Wasabi tried to explain. 

“It's a cartoon.” Honey Lemon added through her snickers. 

“Yeah, a cartoon for babies.” Fred chimed in. “Seriously bro?” 

“Hey, they're disturbing. Alright?” Tadashi defended himself. 

“How are teddy bears that teach kids manners 'disturbing’?” Gogo asked. 

“Because they don't teach anything. They brainwash people into being perfect little mindless drones with those heartfilled laser beams. I'm telling you guys, it's a messed up show. Also Hiro had one of those stuffed animals as a kid and it would not die. I'd bury it in the backyard and three months later it was back in the toy box singing ‘I love you very much’ in its high-pitched voice over and over again.” 

“So in other words, your parents found it outside and put new batteries in it.” Wasabi stated matter of factly. 

“That's just it,” Tadashi insisted. “There were no batteries in it. I checked!” 

“Ooooh… now that is creepy.” Fred whispered. 

Gogo rolled her eyes. "So we got leprechauns, share bears, " she pointed to Fred, "spiders," then to Wasabi, "heights," and lastly to Honey Lemon, "and hippos... for some reason."

"Hippos?" Varian couldn't help asking in spite of himself.

"Hippos are mean." Honey Lemon defended herself. "They bully all of the other animals. Even crocodiles are afraid of them!"

"Don't crocodiles eat hippos though?" Hiro asked.

"Actually adult hippopotamuses are extremely aggressive and most predators leave them alone." Baymax informed them.

"See!?" Honey Lemon shouted, validated. "And they have those big scary tusks and huge mouths, and they can trample you under their weight."

"So can elephants and you love those." Wasabi butt in.

"Yeah, but elephants are adorable." Honey Lemon countered, as if this was an obvious difference.

"Okay," Gogo rolled her eyes again, "So we know what everyone is afraid of, except for you Hiro."

"Me?" Hiro asked, and shrugged. "I don't know. I used to be scared of monsters under the bed when I was like three, but after you've faced what we've faced…. It's kind of hard to find normal things scary."

"What about abnormal things then?" Tadashi asked.

"I... I still have nightmares about the void sometimes." Hiro admitted. "I can face it, but like... it's just nothingness... endless... I won't lie... that's kind of terrifying."

"Many people find the unknown scary. It is a common fear." Baymax said comfortingly.

"But apparently it's not unknown." Fred said. "That Madame Canardist says she traveled through it to get here.” 

“So she says .” Gogo pointed out. “We've no reason to believe her.” 

“We don't really have any reason to disbelieve her either.” Tadashi shrugged. “I mean given everything we've seen so far.” 

“What do you think, Varian?” Wasabi asked. 

Everyone turned to resident portal expert among them, but Varian just sat there hugging his knees and staring at the floor. 

"I think... I'm afraid of failing."

Silence fell over the little group as Varian kept staring at his toes.

He seemed to be considering something before he looked up again, coming to a sort of decision.

"Where did you put Carnardist's scroll?" He asked.

"No." Tadashi said softly, but firmly. "We all agreed that we weren't going that route."

"But-"

"No 'buts'. You said it yourself. It's too dangerous. We'll use the portal."

"And what if I can't get it to work?" Varian sobbed.

"You will," Tadashi reassured, "and we'll go with you to rescue your dad."

For once, Varian didn't even bother to argue the second part. "You don't know that."

"You got it to work before." Hiro pointed out.

"If anyone can make it work you can, querido." Honey Lemon encouraged, wrapping him in a hug.

Varian didn't return it. "Exactly. What if no one can? What if we're just wasting time? What if he's... what if he's already d-"

Gogo sighed, and laid a hand on his shoulder, snapping him out of his panic.

"Hey... I believe in you. We'll keep Madam Carnardist's scroll as a backup, but until we know more about the void, we're going to focus on fixing the portal first."

"Just tell us what you need and we'll help." Wasabi added.

"Oh and Minimax has been running algorithms on that secret code in that Demanti guy's journal every night, just like you asked." Fred said.

Varian only frowned at them, in spite of their support.

"You don't understand." He whispered before suddenly standing up.

He briskly made his way to the stairs and everyone rushed to follow him.

Despite the darkness he ran down them two steps at a time and for a moment, everyone feared that he was going to rush out into the storm, but he stopped at the door.

He stood there staring out into the alleyway and the flurry of snowflakes. Everyone stood still on the stairs, afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing that might send him into a flight. Only for him to  forcefully slam the door. He turned back towards them, shaking as tears ran down his cheeks.

"I hate the snow." His voice cracked with this little admission before he slumped down onto the floor, his back to the door.

Tadashi broke from the group first. "Well I love it, especially if it keeps you from running away yet again."

He stood there in front of his adopted brother, his hands on his hips, as if waiting for an explanation. He had tried to keep his voice light and his manner half joking, but he couldn't fully rid the evident concern on his face. Finally he sighed and sat down next to him.

"Look, I know we don't understand." He said more softly. "And I know it's difficult for you to talk about it. Just.... What are we supposed to do? How can we help?"

Varin sniffled. "Nothing."

Tadashi shook his head and rung his hands. He looked back up the landing to his friends, completely lost.

"What if... what if we ran some experiments?" He slowly offered. "After school starts back. While you and Hiro work on the portal... maybe Baymax and I could study the scroll mor-"

"No!" Hiro half ran, half jumped down the stairs towards them. "No one is reading any freaky magic scrolls or going anywhere near the void."

Tadashi gave his little brother a pleading look, but was surprised to hear Varian speak up in agreement.

"Hiro's right. It was stupid of me to ask. Just... just forget it."

Hiro immediately looked regretful. "We can still work on the portal. You've proven that can be done safely."

Varian gave a long sigh.

"Sure." He said flatly.

Everyone exchanged worried glances. Unable to run away or fight, Varian now went back to his depressed state from earlier, and for some reason that seemed to be even worse.

It was Fred who spoke up first. "It worked the first time, before Momaksake showed up. Did you change the design of the portal any when you rebuilt it?"

Varian shook his head. "No... and I'm using the same focusing device. The amber should work. That's what I can't understand."

"What is the amber anyways?" Tadashi asked. "You said that you made it somehow."

Varian eyes darted away from his, and he wouldn't answer.

"Well, then do you have anything else that you could try?" Wasabi asked.

"No. Nothing else would have the same energy signature. Except... except for the rocks."

"Like Carnardist's paperweight?" Gogo asked. "She said it was made from those rocks."

"She won't let us use it though." Tadashi pointed out.

"Well maybe if we just explained-" Honey Lemon started but Varian interrupted.

"Guys.. just drop it!"

Everyone stared at him. That's when the lights came back on.

This seemed to signal something to Varian. He stood up and made his way back to the stairs. He stopped at the top of the landing.

"Maybe it's time to face the facts." He whispered. "I'm never going to see my Dad again, and it's my fault."

Gogo stepped forward. "Don't say that."

"Gogo, please. All this time I've been trying and trying to fix my mistakes and all I've done is either gone nowhere or made things worse."

"That's not true." Tadashi said, standing up himself, as if highlighting what good Varian had really done just by being there.

Varian looked back at him, lost. Tadashi wouldn't let him continue.

"I've already told you before. It's not your fault."

Varian's face hardened as he looked down on them.

"You weren't there."

His voice sounded colder than the freezing snow outside.

Tadashi made his way back up the stairs until they were face to face.

"In what way is it your fault? It's not like you hurt your dad. You didn't cause the rocks. You didn't start the war. It isn't your fault that the portal's not working."

Varian seemed to crumple in on himself as Tadashi continued.

"Tadashi, please..."

Tadashi ignored his pleas and held him by the shoulders. "Listen. I know. Okay? I know what it's like to blame yourself for bad things, to think about all the ways you could have changed time if you had just done something different, but sometimes accidents just happen and it's no one's fault."

Varian was openly crying now. Tadashi waited.

He was going to make Varian understand. That he didn't need to feel ashamed of his past. They were going to get through this as a family, just like they had always done.

Nothing prepared for the words that came next.

"But I did do all those things." Varian whispered.

"What?"

"I caused the accident..." He started to ramble as he pulled away from Tadshi's astonished grasp. "The rocks were destroying our home! I had to do something! Dad told me not to. B-but I didn't listen. Not till it was too late! We.. we were arguing in my lab, and I heard him shout and he pushed me out of the way... and... and... It's my fault!"

Everyone stood there in shock as the most pitiful wail broke from Varian's lips. "Oh God, why did I ever mix that formula?"

He broke down in tears and no one knew what to do. Then suddenly he gasped as if coming to a realization.

"What if he really is dead? What... what if I killed hi-?"

"Now none of that." That seemed to snap Wasabi out of his shock. He took three big strides and before Varian could react he found himself wrapped up in a big bear hug.

"None of that." Wasabi repeated; softer this time. "Your dad is alive, and we're going to rescue him. And... even if the worse has happened...it is still. not. your. fault."

He made sure to emphasize each word and only held onto him tighter.

"Of course not." Tadashi agreed, and joined in on the hug.

"An accident is still just an accident." Hiro explained as he too came forward.

"Your dad wouldn't blame you." Gogo added.

"We certainly don't." Honey Lemon said as she came up from behind.

"That's.. *hic*... the saddest... *sob*... origin story I've ever heard." Fred bawled before adding himself to the group hug.

"It is difficult sometimes to face our past." Baymax advised. "But remember that, even when you believe you've made a mistake, you are loved."

Now Varian was crying for a whole new reason. He was still loved. They saw his deepest fear and still cared. They still were promising to help his dad, the same as they had done months ago under the sequoia tree. And if they still had hope... maybe he could too.

----------------

Honey Lemon turned in her sleep and reached out to cuddle the nearest person, but her hands grasped nothing but the cold rug underneath.

Her brow furrowed as she barely consciously noticed something was amiss. She fell asleep surrounded by her friends. Someone should be there.... but who?

Her eyes snapped open with alarm. Varian!

She sat up quickly and tried to pierce the darkness as she scanned the living room.

Everyone else was still asleep but Varian's sleeping bag was definitely empty.

Honey Lemon tried not to panic. After all, he could have just decided that his own bed was more comfortable than the floor. But somehow Honey Lemon knew that not to be the case.

Varian, for all his pertinacity for running away, he genuinely hated being alone. Especially when he was upset.

She couldn't see him retreating to his room and willing isolating himself after what he had told everyone about his dad.

Slowly she stood up and tipped toed towards the kitchen. Maybe he woke up for a midnight snack?

She was surprised that her hunch was correct. Varian was indeed in the kitchen, but he wasn't eating.

He just stood there, silently, staring out of the window at the swiftly falling snow.

Unsure how best to approach him, Honey Lemon just quietly moved to stand beside him and watch the storm too.

"Sorry, I tried my best not to wake you." He whispered.

"It's okay." Honey whispered back, and then after a pause asked. "Did you have another nightmare?"

Varian's only answer was to sigh and hang his head, as if he was ashamed of such a thing.

Rather than asking if he wanted to talk about it, Honey Lemon decided on a new tactic. "C-cause I just had one. That's what woke me up actually."

This had the desired effect as Varian completely forgot about his own insecurities and reverted all of his concern onto her instead.

"What about?"

Honey thought quick. "That you had disappeared."

It was close enough to the truth that Varian didn't question it. Instead he gave a soft laugh and tucked a stray strand of her hair behind her ear.

"Well I'm right here." He smiled.

Honey grabbed his hand with both hers as he caressed her cheek. He was still here and she couldn't have been happier for it. If only he would stay and never go back to that awful Corona.

Varian broke away from the embrace first, but he still held her hand as he led her to one of the kitchen chairs. He sat down, and without even thinking about it, Honey Lemon sat in his lap.

It felt so natural to just sit together in the quiet. Him holding her. She absentmindedly running her fingers through his hair.

She could have remained there all night to watch the sunrise, but then her eyes soon landed on the journal sitting on the table.

She reached out to pick it up. It was opened to a page about portals.

She gave him a pout and Varian pressed his lips together, unsure of what to say.

She shook her head, laid the book back down, and stood back up.

"Honey?"

Varian took off after her as she made her way down the stairs.

But rather than answer she forced a smile on her face.

"Do you want some hot cocoa?' She asked him with as cheerful a voice as she could manage, and without waiting for an answer, she went behind the counter and started to pull out the hot cocoa packet and mugs.

Varian stood frozen on the bottom of the landing, bewildered by Honey Lemon's sudden mood swings, not knowing how to proceed.

"Do you want marshmallows?" She asked.

"Yeeeah...?"

He inched slowly towards her as she pulled out the half and half; almost as if she was a deer in the forest that might bolt if he so much as breathed wrong.

"You know... I umm... about that nightmare I had?" He paused waiting for her reaction. She slowed in her moments but didn't look at him. He continued on. "Mine was about the black rocks again. I keep having them. It's sort of the same dream... only different each time and well, whenever I can't sleep I'd rather work on something then just sit there in the dark. S-so that's why I was studying Demantius journal."

"Okay."

Her reply was soft but curt and Varian didn't know how to respond to it.

"Here's your coco." She said with another forced smile and handed him the steaming mug. He took it and gave it a half hearted sip as she went to sit in front of the window.

The street lamp outside lit the swirling flurries with a soft warm glow. It was beautiful. It was deceptive. And it was cold.

His gaze landed back on the slender woman's silhouette, also bathed in that same warm light and every bit as frosty as the snow that fell.

He suppressed a sigh of frustration and took a seat next to her. They sat there, for who knows how many minutes, just looking at the storm.

“I know you don't want me going back to Corona.” He said, finally breaking the silence. 

Honey Lemon didn't respond. 

“B-but you do understand how important it is, right?” He pressed. “Now that I've told you everything?...You don't have to like it. I just need you to understand.” 

“I understand.” She whispered; not looking at him. 

“Do you? Do you really? Cause, it doesn't feel like it when you get mad at me for working on the portal.” 

She turned her head away from him, but didn't answer. He sighed and went back to nursing his cup of coco. The uncomfortable silence returned. 

"Did you know I had a sister?" She asked suddenly, and Varian turned to her in surprise.

"Umm... n-no. No I didn't." he stuttered.

"I've never met her."

She still wasn't looking at him as she stared at her toes.

"I don't even know her name."

She almost laughed at that. Almost. Like a breathless gasp that she nearly choked on.

"See... after dad moved out he got this job at a university. It was practically on the opposite side of the world. Anyways... I  hadn't heard from for awhile, so I contacted the collage and got his private office. Some girl answered the phone and when I asked to talk to 'Professor Hopken’, I heard her call out 'Daaad!' Phone call for you!' so I just hung up.” 

Varian didn't say anything. He sat there, with concern etched onto his face. Honey Lemon knew that look, but didn't turn to face him. She kept staring at her cup of coco that she had barely drunk out of. 

“I always thought that the reason he left was because he didn't want to be a dad. That he had to put his career on hold when he and mama had me. But I guess he just didn't want to be my dad.” 

“Don't say that.” 

Honey Lemon finally looked at him and gave him a sad smile. “I know. It's not me. It was never about me or my brother.” 

She let out a shaky breath. 

“Look, you're right. I don't understand. I never had a dad who cared. I can't even begin to imagine what you've gone through. But why do I have to understand? I'm not trying to stop you. I said I would help.” 

Varian let out a second sigh; one of defeat instead of frustration. 

“I know. I guess… I just feel guilty when I see you upset over it.” 

“Sorry.”

“No. No, don't be sorry. You didn't do anything wrong. I guess…I should be happy that you care so much?”

Honey Lemon snorted over his awkwardness. 

“Well, if I was planning on traveling to a dangerous alternate dimension to save someone, what would you do?” 

“Go with you.” 

“And if I told you ‘No. It's too dangerous.’ What then?” 

He conceded with a nod. 

“Okay. I get it.” 

“Sooo you'll let us help you?” 

“Define help.” 

���Like coming with you to Corona to save your dad?” 

Varian stifled a groan. “How?” 

“What do you mean ‘how’?” 

“I mean how will you being there help?” 

“Well for one we could fight off that nasty king if he showed up!” 

“It wouldn't be the king. It would be the king's guard and Rapunzel. You can't just bubble the princess like you do criminals.” 

“Why not?” 

“Magic.” He said seriously. 

Honey Lemon’s stomach dropped. Varian hated any association with magic. It only dawned on her just now why. He hated magic, because he had fought against magic. It wasn't fairy godmothers granting wishes to attend royals balls nor pixie dust that made people fly. Magic was something to be feared. Magic was a weapon. 

She took a deep breath, squared her shoulders, and looked him straight in the eye.

“And we have the power of science.” She said with far more confidence than she felt. 

Varian slowly broke out into a grin before snorting with laughter. 

“It wasn't that corny… was it?” 

“It was,” he snickered.

Honey Lemon pouted. 

“And it was glorious.” He added. Which made her feel a little better. 

“B-but I mean it. We could figure out some way to like.. I don't know… block her powers or something.” 

Varian swallowed down his giggles with another swig of coco, before gaining his composure. 

“I'll make you a deal.” He said, more seriously this time. “If you can find a way to dispel magic. You can come. ” 

Honey Lemon raised an eyebrow. “And if we can't?” 

“Then you stay behind to man the portal.” 

“I'm not sure if I like that deal.”

“Someone has to stay behind, so that whoever goes won't get stuck.” He reasoned. 

Honey Lemon saw the logic in that but wasn't ready to give up. 

“On one condition.” 

“Name it.” 

Honey Lemon bit her lip for a moment before jumping up and pulling Varian away from the table and his mug of coco. 

“We have a snowball fight.” 

“What!?” 

“We have a snowball fight.” She repeated as she opened the front door. Everything looked pale and gray in the early morning. “If you win, then I'll accept the terms of the deal. If I win, then we renegotiate.” 

She stood in the doorway, hands on her hips, looking at him expectantly. 

He however looked at her as if she was crazy. 

“I’m not going out in that .” He pointed behind her. 

“It's just snow. It won't hurt you.” 

“It's cold.” 

“We're both wearing sweaters.” 

She grabbed a couple of scarves and hats off the coat hanger next to the door and tossed some at him. 

“You could slip on the ice.” He protested, as she put on her boots.

“And it's not even fully light out yet.”

 She didn't hear him as she ran outside. 

“Fine, I'll renegotiate!” He yelled from the doorway; his hands up in the air in surrender, still clutching the hat and scarf. 

Honey Lemon paused, snow in hand. 

“You mean I can come with?” 

“I didn't say that.” 

Honey Lemon grabbed another handful of snow and started packing it on top of the previous handful. 

“Okay… okay.” 

She looked up to see him snag a handful of snow himself while still standing in the doorway. 

A short but fierce snowball fight began. Honey Lemon ran this way and that. Varian never left the doorway. Somehow they both manage to completely miss each other every time. 

Varian dogged another snowball as it smacked into the side of the doorframe, and then he scooped down to get more ammunition. 

He had to lean out far to grab more fresh snow, since had used up all that was in front of the door. 

Honey Lemon took aim, and then lowered her arm as she watched him struggle. 

“We can take a break if you want to get your shoes.” 

“No… it's fine… I got it.” He grunted as he nabbed a pitiful handful of powdery frost, before catching himself as he nearly fell face forward. 

He righted himself quickly and started quickly forming a ball before it melted in his hand. He stopped when he noticed that Honey was no longer throwing anything at him. 

“Do you really hate the snow that much?” She asked. 

“I… don't hate it.” He squirmed. “I just…” 

He trailed off, unable to articulate his complex history with the weather. When looked up again, she was standing in front of him. Her hands now empty. 

“I'm sorry. I just thought it would be fun.” 

“It was fun.” He insisted. “Really. I'm… I'm just bad at snowball fights.”

She threw her arms around his neck, and he dropped the last of the half melted snow. 

“Oh what are we going to do?” She moaned, her face inches from his own. 

“Uhhh…” His mind blanked. “I don't know.” He managed to mutter.

His head swam. She had given him hugs before but this felt different. He could feel her warm breath on his lips, contrasting with freezing air and he wanted to kiss her. Kiss her properly, on the mouth. Like he'd seen in movies and read in books. 

But would she let him?

He didn't get a chance to find out. 

“What are you doing holding the open like that? It's freezing out there.” 

Varian snapped his head around to see Aunt Cass and his brothers on the stairs. 

“Yeah and some of us are still trying to sleep.” Tadashi added, hugging himself to keep warm. 

“If you want to go outside that's fine, but try not to let all the warm air out with you.” Aunt Cass finished before turning to go back up stairs. 

“Why can't you two flirt like normal people?” Hiro sneered before following after. 

Both Varain and Honey Lemon turned beat red. 

She slowly untangled her arms from around his neck as Tadashi left as well, and he stepped aside to let her in. 

He was about to close the door too when a strong gust of wind blasted in his face. 

Honey Lemon squeaked and covered her head as something clambered against the side of the wall. 

Varian looked to see what had hit the side of the house. It was black and poking out of the snow. 

Ignoring his socks getting soaked through, he strode over to the object to pick it up. 

Its handle glinted in the soft light and his heart stopped. 

“What is it?” Honey asked, peering from the doorway. 

“It's a knife.” 

“A knife?” 

He pulled the dagger from its sheath to show her. Even the blade was polished black stone. 

“That's weird.” She commented. “Who leaves knives lying around?”

He looked at her with an unreadable expression on his face. 

“It's not from here.” He said. “It's from Corona.”

[choccyhearts]

Lollipop Chainsaw // Steve Harrington x Reader

Note: is this too niche of an idea? i originally thought of this as an eddie fic until i realized, no, steve fits the profile for handsome jock obviously, and he would love any kind of sexy couples costume with his partner <3 (also this idea came to me because i thought it'd be sooo hot but awful irl)

CW: 18+!! Suggestive and spicy but not smut, fem!reader, light soft!dom!reader/sub!steve dynamic, steve is in LOVE, modern!steve but only cause of the video game, plzz lemme know if i missed anything!

Here's the costume btw:

♡

Steve wasn't ever really into Halloween. He did all the traditions, but it wasn't a time of year he was dying to celebrate. As he got older, he liked it for the reasons young people like it -- drinking and sexy costumes. Not that he didn't have a sweet tooth too, though.

But once he started dating you, he quickly discovered how serious people could take the holiday. Not that he was complaining. He thought it was adorable, the way your face lit up when you'd see a pumpkin or skeleton in front of someone's home, or how excited you'd get when you were making your autumn treats. And it meant he had a wide variety of dates he could take you on -- haunted houses, hay rides, pumpkin picking, picnics.

He also helped you decorate, putting up the really high stuff like spider webs and lights. He loved how big your smile was when you saw your vision come true thanks to his help. He may not love Halloween, but he sure loves you, so I guess he loves Halloween by association.

But when it came to picking out a costume, something he was excited to do, you had other plans. He wanted to do something cheesy and coupley or sexy and totally hot. He'd always thought it would be cute to have the couples' costume experience for just one night. A silent way of showing you off to everyone, making sure they know you're only his.

You, however, told him that you already knew what you were going to be and it was going to be a surpise. Steve knew he was going to like whatever you pick, but he couldn't help but feel a little bummed that another Halloween was going to come and go and he once again wasn't going to live out his couples costume fantasy.

So, now he lay on your bed, tossing a stress ball into the air and catching it while you're in the bathroom. It's Halloween weekend, and there's a party you're both excited for. Steve decided to go without costume, not having come up with a good idea soon enough. You asked him sweetly over the phone to wear his old Hawkins varsity jacket and the pair of jeans that hugged his ass and bulge nicely but refused to clue him in why.

A sigh leaves Steve's lips, his eyes lazily following the stress ball as it soars and drops over and over again. It had been almost half an hour, and you were still in the bathroom. He was getting antsy, wanting to check in and see if you were okay. He knew it took girls a while in the bathroom (though it could be argued he takes just as long), so he just assumed you were trying to fix your hair or makeup.

"Babyyy, are you almost finished?" His voice comes out whinier than he wants, but it still gets his point across.

"Almost, Stevie. I promise it'll be worth it," you call to him lovingly.

You stare at yourself in the mirror, adjusting your belt. You knew this idea was perfect, and you were counting down the days until you could reveal it. Your eyes drift over your body in the mirror, donning a Juliet Starling costume.

When it came to picking out the perfect costume idea to surprise Steve with, you wanted something that would take his breath away and wrap him even tighter around your finger. Most sexy couples costumes were good, but you didn't want to be the third Morticia and Gomez at a party. You wanted something you figured no one else would wear, and after playing the game, Lollipop Chainsaw, you knew it was the perfect costume.

Steve hums softly to himself, mind blanking as he continues waiting. You walk into your room, and like a puppy, Steve sits up putting all of his attention on you. He smiles at you, heart racing as he looks at your cute appearance, standing in front of him with your hair in two pig tails and makeup done softly.

"You look sooo pretty, baby," Steve grins, face flushed and eyes shining.

"You can't even see my costume," you tease, as you've hidden it under a robe.

"Doesn't matter, still look pretty," he blinks slowly, very love drunk.

"Well, you look handsome too, my love." You walk to him, standing between his legs as you set your hands on his shoulders. He lets out a 'mmm' and brings his face against your stomach, needing to just melt into you. You delicately drag your nails against his neck, not wanting to mess up his styled hair.

"My handsome, adorable lover boy," you coo before pulling away. He tightens his arms around you and grunts in response.

"No, wanna stay like this," his voice is muffled as he speaks against your body.

"Don't you wanna see my costume? I wanna see yours." You successfully free yourself and take a couple steps back.

"Yeah, speaking of, why did I need to wear this?"

You don't answer verbally. Instead, untying your robe and sliding it off your body, revealing the cute blue and pink cheerleading uniform. You let the robe fall to the floor as you do a small spin to let Steve look at all of you. His eyes widen and get shinier as he refuses to blink, his mouth parting in an 'o' shape. Lights are on, but no one's home.

"What do you think? Isn't it cute?"

Your little boyfriend can't even hear you, his brain too occupied drinking in your seductive beauty. All he can think about is how mouth-watering your thighs look, how soft and plush your tits look, how he could just barely see your ass when you turned. He wants to keep staring but he also wants to touch you.

"Stevie?" You walk forward and use two fingers to guide his chin to look up at you.

He blinks a few times, involuntary tears falling as his eyes rehydrate.

"I'm sorry, baby, what did you say?"

"Do you like it?"

He pulls you against him again and groans loudly.

"You kidding, me? I looove it, I mean it. I fucking love it," his hands squeeze your ass which makes you jump. You bite back a moan, not wanting to let him distract you.

"Thank you, sweetie." You kiss the top of his head. "And now, for the other surprise!"

"Another surprise? Baby, I don't think my heart can take it."

"Come on, you'll reallyyy like this one," you say in a sing-songy tone.

"Well, I reallyyy like this one, just fine," he mimicks you. "So why don't we just stay here, put on a scary movie, and I show you a few tricks of my own."

He holds your left wrist and begins kissing up your arm, knowing it's your weakness. You hum happily, always enjoying getting loved on by him. His lips are soft and gentle as they stamp your skin over and over again. But his efforts are useless.

"Nope, nope. Let me show you the other half of the costume." You pull off as he gripes at you.

You go into your closet and pull out a thick, neck brace looking collar with a metal loop on the back. You keep it hidden behind your back from Steve as you walk back to him.

"So, you've never played this game, but our costumes are inspired by two characters from a game called Lollipop Chainsaw. I'm Juliet, the protagonist, a zombie hunting cheerleader, and you get to be her football player jock boyfriend."

"I see why you asked me to wear this now."

"There's just one thing about her boyfriend."

"Is he zombie?"

"No, actually, Juliet saves him by decapitating him."

"So you're asking to decapitate me," Steve asks with heavy sarcasm lacing his tone.

"No." You roll your eyes before pulling the collar from behind your back, and Steve eyes it confused. You walk towards him and motion it to him, asking if he'll let you put it on him. He nods, trusting you and remembering you said he'd like it. You've never steered him wrong yet. What's the harm?

You unclasp the collar and begin to gently wrap it around Steve's neck.

"After she decapitates him, she does a spell to keep him alive. And, for the rest of the game, she needs to keep him safe."

You click the collar shut and allow Steve to make any adjustments. Once he confirms he's comfortable, you continue.

"So, she keeps him with her by attaching him to her belt."

You turn and show him you have a clip attached to the side of your belt. You look at Steve as he slowly makes the connection of what you're asking him to do.

"So, I thought, obviosuly not for the entire night, you could stay clipped to me. And it stretches too, see?" You demonstrate that the clip is on a stetchy wire. "So if you need to move around you can."

He stays quiet, an unreadable look on his face. Your face heats and stomach drops. This is not going how you thought it would. You knew Steve wanted to do a couples costume and you should've just planned it with him instead of trying to surprise him and-

Steve slides off your bed and down to his knees. He shuffles over and grips your leg, looking up at you with pleading eyes. This was somehow better than anything he could've imagined. He should've known you'd do something so thoughtful.

♡

And that's how you end up walking around a party with a large prop chainsaw in one hand and your lovesick boyfriend Steve attached at the hip, literally. His big, strong hands grabbing and groping you anytime he needs a Halloween treat (the real reason you picked this costume) and soft, wet mouth biting your ass and thighs anytime he wants a trick.

Unsurprisingly, he stays attached the entire night!! He sits on his knees while you mingle and talk to your friends, lays his head on your lap when you sit on the couch, and chooses to just stumble over his feet while you walk around --and yes, he does need to grab your ass cheek while you move, how else is he supposed to hold on???

It's safe to say Steve's favorite holiday is now Halloween...

[unchartedthelostlegacy]

Water in my ear

The first mistake was dismissing the early signs of the infection. The second was getting onto the plane home with a burning hot ear. Nadine could have burst her eardrum. She should have known better.

It was just so stupid that after all the danger and risks they took, some water in her ear was what ended up getting her.

Nadine swallowed, and it hurt. The pain radiated through the entire side of her head. She had to keep taking the antibiotics as the doctor prescribed, which meant she had to eat, no matter how little of an appetite she had. Nadine swallowed another painful bite of apple.

She was in a hammock hooked between two walls of an armory. Probably not ideal for someone having intermittent dizzy spells. At her flat in Johannesburg, she'd just be set upon by relatives. She was lying low in an old Shoreline hideout near Cape Town instead. And why was it comforting to her, being alone and surrounded by weapons with a book?

The compound was half-subterranean, hidden by nondescript office buildings on all but one side, and the alarms and locks didn't depend on the frequently load-shedding mains electricity. The entrance was a narrow passageway behind a warehouse. The only Shoreline personnel with knowledge of or access to the location were either reading Tom Clancy inside it or dead.

Sorry, former Shoreline personnel.

I could bury the guns, Nadine thought.

The Kalashnikovs filling the room like sharp stalactites would most likely fall into the wrong hands if she was to unload them on the market. Pun unintended.

I could put soft lighting in and add marble countertops and built-in storage. Charge people to spend vacations in a unique doomsday-prepper-themed AirBnB.

Nadine's ear throbbed. She wriggled deeper into the blanket. The building's end-to-end silence was its own security feature. The scratching of a mouse's feet would be audible.

Unless it was on the side of the wrong ear.

Nadine's phone buzzed. It was Chloe again. She would never have imagined feeling more able to talk to Nathan Drake's old flame than her own family.

Chloe was telling her about wanting to be involved in her local Hindu community more now. She was reading more about it. "In a personal way, you know? I never felt this close to it when Dad was telling me about it."

"What book are you reading right now?" Nadine said.

"The Mahabharata."

Chloe said it so casually.

"The...the whole thing, Frazer?"

"What, like it's hard?"

Nadine fought back a scoff. It would only make her pain worse. "Whatever. I thought you'd recommend an entry-level book to modern Hindu practice or something."

"I guess I want to make sure I'm...I don't know."

Chloe was sighing. God, that had to be bad. Chloe had to be spilling her guts right now if she was letting herself sigh. And there was that nervous laughter of hers.

She wanted to make sure she was doing it correctly. Because Chloe was trying to find one side of her roots and she was guilty for not seeking it sooner. And she was having doubts she even could, because while not everyone had Asav-level epithets to shout, being multiracial was complicated.

And it wasn't like Nadine could tell her something that would make it easier.

"I'm not taking up too much of your time, love?"

"No," Nadine said. "It's good to have a distraction, anyway."

"From what?"

"Ear infection." Nadine had to laugh saying it. "Remember when I got water in my ear?"

There was a slam on the line.

"WHY didn't you TELL me?!"

Nadine winced and pulled the phone away. "Shit! Ow!"

"You let me go on and on about--" Chloe was furious.

"Shut up, Chloe! I--I like hearing about how you feel!"

"--bloody hell! Where are you?"

Nadine muttered, "Nowhere close, if that's what you're asking."

"Did you--Nadine, did you already have it on the flight?!"

"Ja."

"BUGGER! You shouldn't have got on the--"

"Ja," Nadine was speaking through her teeth now. "Stop yelling or I'll hang up."

"Some military professional," Chloe said.

Nadine couldn't even grumble. It hurt. "Because in the military you get excused from air offensives because of water in your ear." Besides helicopters did not share the ear-exploding air pressure differences of commercial airliners. Nadine could never justify the cost of a fighter jet.

"I thought you were about avoiding risks."

It was choppy, like Chloe was pacing about her house gesticulating wildly at the phone.

"Chloe, please stop talking about it," Nadine said. "It's an ear infection. I'm not going to die."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Why was Chloe's voice so broken when she said that. Why did it make Nadine's heart hurt.

"What would you have done?"

"I don't know? Encouraged you to change your flight? Paid for another few nights at the hotel so you could wait till you got better? Gone home with you if your stubborn ass insisted on not wasting money on the nonrefundable--"

"You don't need to babysit me," Nadine snapped.

Chloe fired back, "You sure babysat me, mate, when I had my little coma after getting my bell rung back there."

Nadine swallowed again, and it hurt, again, even without a piece of apple.

She said, softly, "And have you gone to get checked for multiple concussions like I asked you to?"

"What would they do for this old brain in this rubber skull, Nadine?"

Nadine would have laughed, if wouldn't hurt so bad.

"Tell you not to drive until you recover. Don't start. Shut up, Chloe. Tell you to get plenty of rest and come back for follow-up so they can keep an eye on the serious complications that can come from a traumatic brain injury. Oh, just a few things."

"I'll make an appointment," Chloe said. "Just...please tell me where you are. Nadine, I need--"

"You don't."

"Let me--it's not like it's contagious--I could make things a bit easier at least--"

Nadine said, "Talking to you like this already does."

"My ass it does," Chloe wasn't going down without a fight. "You probably have a fever and aren't drinking enough water and I could help you around if you're dizzy and--"

"Ugh!" Nadine bit the edge of her palm. She hated how badly she wanted it. "Shit, Frazer, I'll text you the location. Good luck finding it. You can see a doctor while you're here so I'll know you aren't lying about getting your head checked."

Nadine couldn't believe she was doing this.

"I would never," Chloe said sweetly. "See you soon, love."