#and HEARTBREAK and DESPAIR and HOPE and stuff | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

luvst4rc0r3 · 5 months ago

Note

HII so idk what's going on with the whole pregnant reader thing but I feel like u stabbed me bcz why u gotta make it so sad😭 but I thought about the idea that after reader's miscarriage and Jinx takes in Isha, she gets a taste of what it's like to be a mom and it gives her the hope to try again. But then after Isha dies, everything all goes to shit again (events of act 3 play out), but then after Jinx gets out of jail and teams up with Ekko, she goes to reader and says something like "once this is all over, we're getting out of here." And they move to bildgewater together and have an actual child there in a more healthy and happy space :)) maybe for a time skip part but idk lol, anyway just thought I'd leave this here!! Live laugh love Jinx

request: Your “I don’t wanna be here anymore.”

It was super interesting.

And also made me cry😭😭

Can you write a happy ending for it?

TY if you do

request:I'm gonna need a good ending where Jinx and r have the baby and live happily ever after because that last ask fucked me up😭😭😭😭

"But good things don’t always last forever"

Jinx x F!Reader

WARNINGS: DEATH, MENTIONS OF MISCARRIAGE!! WC: 3165

NOTE: erm I hope yall are ok now.

Summary: After a heartbreaking miscarriage, you fall into despair, but Jinx—determined to bring light back into your life—unexpectedly finds a little girl named Isha, who needs a family just as much as you both do.

PT.1

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

The hideout was quiet. Too quiet.

Jinx hated it.

She sat on the edge of the bed, bouncing her leg as she watched you, curled up with your back to her, shoulders trembling under the blanket. You’d barely moved in hours. Days. It felt like weeks.

Jinx wasn’t great with words, but she knew that whatever she said wouldn’t make it better. The grief sat heavy between you, thick and suffocating. She wanted to tear it apart, blow it up, do something—but this wasn’t something she could fix with bombs or bullets.

So, she stayed. As much as she wanted to run from feelings, from pain, she stayed.

She reached out, brushing her fingers over your arm.

“Hey, toots…” Her voice was softer than usual. Hesitant. “Y’wanna get outta here? Just for a bit?”

You didn’t answer. Didn’t even stir.

Jinx sighed. She pressed a quick kiss to your shoulder before getting up.

“I’ll be back,” she muttered.

You didn’t respond.

Jinx wandered the streets of Zaun, hands stuffed in her pockets, trying to ignore the ache in her chest. She hated seeing you like that. Hated knowing there was nothing she could do to take away your pain.

She needed to find something. Something that could help.

It had been weeks since everything fell apart—since the baby was gone. Since your heart had shattered into something unrecognizable. You barely left the bed, barely ate, barely breathed.

Jinx never said it, but you knew it scared her.

She’d always been the reckless one, the impulsive one, the wild one. But now, you were the one slipping away.

And Jinx? She didn’t know how to stop it.

So, she did what she always did when the world felt like too much. She ran.

Jinx wasn’t looking for a kid.

She was looking for a fight, for trouble—something, anything to pull her out of her head. Out of you and the way you wouldn’t even look at her anymore.

But what she found was a girl.

Small. Filthy. Silent.

Fell on top of her while some guys chased her.

Once Jinx shot off the guys she crouched in front of her, frowning.

“Hey, shorty. What’s your deal?”

No answer.

The girl just stared.

Jinx clicked her tongue. “Oh, great. You’re broken too.”

Still nothing.

Jinx was about to leave—she wasn’t in the business of picking up strays—but then she saw it.

A fresh bruise, deep and purple, blooming along the girl’s cheek.

Jinx’s stomach twisted.

“…Shit.”

She wasn’t good at this stuff. She wasn’t you. But you… you would’ve stopped. You would’ve helped.

And maybe, just maybe, if she brought this kid home, you’d look at her again.

Jinx sighed, rubbing the back of her neck.

“follow me or not. I don’t care”

She followed.

She studied the kid. Dirty, scared, alone. Just like she used to be.

Maybe… maybe this was it. The something she’d been looking for.

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

You didn’t know what to think when Jinx came home with her.

You sat up in bed, blinking blearily as Jinx strolled in, dragging a small, silent child behind her.

“Babe, meet Isha. Isha, meet Babe.” Jinx grinned like this was normal. Like she hadn’t just brought home a whole person.

You just stared.

“…What?”

Jinx flopped onto the bed beside you, throwing an arm over your waist.

“She fell on me. Didn’t say a word. Figured, y’know, she could use some better company. We could use some better company.”

You looked at the child.

She was thin. Too thin. Her hands were curled into tight little fists, her lips pressed together in an unreadable line. She looked… wary. Not scared, not trusting. Just waiting.

For what, you weren’t sure.

But you knew that feeling.

Jinx sighed against your shoulder. “You’re not mad, are ya?”

You swallowed. No. You weren’t mad.

You were just… tired.

But when you looked at Isha—really looked at her—something deep inside you cracked.

Maybe it was the way she wouldn’t meet your eyes. Maybe it was the way she stood, stiff and defensive, like she expected you to tell her to leave.

Or maybe it was the way, despite all of it, she still stayed.

“…She can stay,” you murmured.

Jinx made a triumphant noise.

Isha didn’t react.

But when you got up and grabbed a blanket, draping it over her tiny shoulders, she didn’t flinch away.

That was enough.

For now.

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

The first few days were quiet.

Isha barely made a sound. You barely spoke. Jinx bounced between watching you both like a hawk and blowing things up in the dead of night, like movement could stop her from thinking too hard.

But, slowly, something shifted.

It started small.

You’d wake up in the morning, roll over, and instead of being met with an empty bed, you’d find Isha sitting on the floor, drawing.

She wasn’t great at it—her little hands were too shaky, the colors smeared—but it was something.

And for the first time in what felt like forever, you wanted to do something, too.

So, one day, you sat beside her.

She tensed—always waiting for rejection—but when you picked up a crayon and started drawing next to her, she hesitated. Then, slowly, she handed you a blue one.

That was the first good day.

Jinx practically vibrated with excitement when she saw the two of you, sprawled out on the floor, doodling nonsense.

“Holy shit, progress!” she cheered, flopping onto your back. “Babe, you’re alive again!”

You snorted, nudging her playfully.

“This is a miracle!” Jinx gasped dramatically, clutching her chest. “Someone get me a camera—this belongs in the history books!”

Isha watched Jinx’s antics with wide eyes, and when you turned to her, you swore you saw something flicker on her face.

Something close to a smile.

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

You couldn’t sleep much anymore.

ever since everything.

And tonight? Tonight was bad.

She woke up to the sound of you breathing too fast, fingers twitching in your sleep.

She didn’t hesitate.

Sliding closer, she brushed your fingers through your hair, pressing a soft kiss to your temple.

“Babydoll,” she murmured. “Wake up, love.”

you gasped awake, eyes darting wildly until they landed on her.

She didn’t say anything. Just held you.

Your arms wrapped around you tight—desperate, grounding—and for a while, you both just stayed like that.

Then, small movement.

You looked up.

Isha stood in the doorway, blanket clutched in her hands, staring with wide, uncertain eyes.

Jinx let out a breath, forcing a smirk. “Hey, shortstack. Couldn’t sleep either, huh?”

Isha hesitated, then shook her head.

You lifted the blanket, silently inviting her in.

For a moment, she stayed frozen. Then, carefully, she climbed onto the bed, curling up between you both.

Jinx snorted. “Well, well. Looks like we’re officially outnumbered.”

You chuckled, pressing a kiss to Isha’s hair.

And for the first time in forever, you slept through the night, peacefully.

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

It started with a rainy day.

Zaun’s skies were always grim, but today, the rain came in heavy, flooding the alleyways and making the apartment feel even smaller.

Isha sat by the window, watching raindrops race down the glass. Her little fingers traced them, following each droplet with quiet concentration.

Jinx groaned dramatically, sprawled upside down on the couch, legs hanging over the backrest. “I’m bored.”

You smirked, looking up from your book. “And whose fault is that?”

“Yours,” she shot back immediately, flipping onto her stomach. “Entertain me.”

You rolled your eyes. “Not my job.”

Jinx gasped, hand over her heart. “Wow. Rude.” Then, she perked up, eyes gleaming. “Wait. I got it.”

She jumped to her feet, startling Isha, who turned and blinked.

“Pillow fort.” Jinx grinned, pointing dramatically at you. “Right now.”

You raised a brow. “Aren’t we a little old for—”

Jinx was already tearing cushions off the couch.

Isha watched her with wide, curious eyes.

Jinx caught her staring and grinned. “Whaddya think, shortstack? Wanna help?”

Isha hesitated. Then, slowly, she nodded.

Jinx let out a victorious whoop! and tossed a blanket over her head. “Welcome to the chaos, kid!”

You couldn’t help but smile.

Within half an hour, the living room was transformed.

Blankets draped over chairs, cushions stacked like castle walls, fairy lights strung across the ceiling. It was warm, cozy, perfect.

Isha crawled inside, eyes wide as she ran her hands over the soft fabric.

Jinx flopped down beside her, arms behind her head. “Not bad, huh?”

You sat across from them, watching as Isha slowly, carefully, curled up between you both.

For the first time all day, she relaxed.

Jinx smirked, nudging you playfully. “See? Told you it was a good idea.”

You chuckled, shaking your head. “Alright, fine. You win.”

Jinx puffed out her chest. “Damn right I do.”

Isha watched your banter, something soft in her expression. Then—carefully, hesitantly—she reached out and took your hand.

Your breath caught.

She turned to Jinx, then did the same.

Jinx’s eyes widened.

Neither of you spoke.

You just squeezed her tiny hands, warmth blooming in your chest as the rain pattered softly outside.

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

It started with Jinx.

Because of course it did.

She thought it would be hilarious to put blue dye in your shampoo.

You stepped out of the bathroom, dripping wet, staring at her with murderous intent.

Jinx, sprawled on the couch with Isha in her lap, burst into laughter.

“Oh—oh my god—babe, you look—” She was wheezing, wiping tears from her eyes. “I��I’m sorry, I can’t—”

Isha, sitting innocently beside her, covered her mouth, eyes shining with amusement.

You crossed your arms. “You think this is funny?”

Jinx gasped for breath. “Babe, c’mon, you’re literally blue!”

Isha let out a small, breathy giggle.

You smirked.

“Alright, Powder,” you said sweetly. “Game on.”

Jinx’s laughter stopped.

“…Wait.”

By the end of the week, it was war.

You switched Jinx’s sugar with salt.

She short-sheeted the bed.

You put hot sauce in her morning coffee.

She filled your boots with glitter.

Isha, watching the chaos unfold, was delighted.

And then—

The prank truce.

Because somehow, somehow, Isha got caught in the middle.

Jinx had set up an elaborate bucket trap for you, but you weren’t the one who walked through the door.

Isha did.

The bucket tipped.

Flour everywhere.

A long, long silence followed.

Jinx paled. “Oh. Shit.”

Isha, completely dusted in white, blinked.

You braced for tears.

But instead—

She grinned.

Then, the softest, most mischievous giggle bubbled out of her.

Jinx gasped. “Babe.”

You were already smirking. “She’s one of us.”

Jinx wiped a fake tear from her eye. “I’m so proud.”

And just like that, Isha became the ultimate prank war champion.

You had created a monster.

And honestly?

You wouldn’t have it any other way.

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

Your life finally feels complete again.

For weeks you felt alone and scared.

Scared that you failed Jinx.

You saw Jinx actual feel like she has a purpose again.

But then—

when you both were finally settling in your guy’s new life.

she was gone.

But now—

you guys have Isha

finally feel full again.

but good things don’t always last forever.

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

It happened too fast.

One second, you were all together—fighting, running, surviving.

The next—

Isha was holding a gun.

Your breath caught in your throat, legs moving before your brain could catch up.

Jinx screamed.

“Isha!”

Jinx lunged.

She almost made it.

Almost.

Isha’s eyes met yours—And then—

She was gone.

Falling.

And then—nothing.

Silence.

it wasn’t fair.

Not again.

Not her.

Not your baby.

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

Everything burned.

Piltover was drowning in smoke, fire licking at the streets, sirens screaming in the distance. The air was thick with dust and blood, and the world felt like it was cracking apart.

And maybe it was.

Maybe you were.

Jinx stood beside you, gun smoking, eyes wild. Her fingers twitched on Fishbones, but her grip was steady. It always was in a fight.

She turned to you, breath ragged, face smeared with dirt and sweat.

“Once we’re out,” she rasped, voice raw from screaming, “we’ll get the life we always wanted.”

You swallowed, gripping your own weapon, heart pounding against your ribs.

“Jinx—”

“I mean it.” She reached for you, gripping your wrist like it was the only thing keeping her grounded. “No more running. No more fighting. Just us, babe. We’ll leave. Start fresh. We’ll have—”

She choked on the words.

But you knew.

She meant Isha.

She meant family.

She meant the life that was stolen from you both.

Your throat tightened. “Jinx…”

“I swear.” Her eyes burned, desperate, pleading. “Just hold on a little longer. Please.”

You exhaled shakily.

Then—slowly—you nodded.

Jinx let out a breath, pressing her forehead to yours.

For a moment, just one, the war didn’t exist.

It was just you and her.

Like it used to be.

Like it could be again.

If you survived.

If you made it out.

Jinx pulled back, smirking despite the blood on her lip. “C’mon, babe.” She lifted Fishbones. “Let’s finish this.”

And so, you did.

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

The war ended in fire.

You made it out.

Barely.

With nothing but your weapons, the clothes on your backs, and the weight of ghosts in your hearts—

you both flew away.

Flew away from the wreckage. From the war. From everything.

And when you stopped running—

You were in Bilgewater.

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

The first thing you noticed was the salt.

Bilgewater smelled like the sea—like salt and spice and damp wood. The docks groaned under the weight of ships, traders shouting over each other as people bustled past.

It was chaotic. Loud. Messy.

It was perfect.

Jinx stretched, arms high above her head, letting out a long, satisfied sigh.

“Smells like fish and crime,” she said, grinning. “I love it.”

You snorted. “You would.”

She turned to you, nudging your side. “You sure about this, babe? New place, new start—no more blowing stuff up for fun. You ready for that?”

You exhaled, looking out at the ocean.

The wind was soft here. The sun actually touched your skin instead of hiding behind smog.

You turned back to Jinx, taking her hand in yours.

“Yeah,” you murmured. “I’m ready.”

Jinx’s grin softened.

She squeezed your hand.

“Then let’s go home.”

It wasn’t much.

Just a small shack near the docks—rickety, barely standing, but yours.

Jinx spent weeks fixing it up, scrounging for parts, muttering about “engineering genius” and “making this place badass.”

You just watched her work, heart full for the first time in what felt like forever.

Because she was happy.

You both were.

No more war. No more running.

Just waking up with Jinx tangled around you, her hair messy, her breath warm against your neck.

Just late nights on the rooftop, watching the waves, talking about nothing and everything.

Just peace.

And one day, as Jinx lay beside you, fingers lazily tracing patterns on your arm, she whispered—

“We made it.”

You turned to her, brushing blue strands from her face.

“We did.”

She smiled, soft and real, and for the first time in a long time—

There were no ghosts.

No war.

No grief.

Just you and her.

And the life you always wanted.

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

Bilgewater had been home for a couple months now.

The war was a distant memory, just a story told in whispers between you and Jinx when the nights stretched too long and the past felt too close.

Life had settled.

Jinx still tinkered, still got into trouble, still stole things just because she could. But she was happy. She laughed more, slept easier, held you like she was afraid you’d slip away in the night.

And you?

For the first time in your life, you were at peace.

But something was missing.

Something you and Jinx didn’t talk about out loud—not for months, not after what happened.

Then one night, as you both lay tangled on the couch, a storm raging outside, Jinx spoke—soft, hesitant.

“…Do you ever think about it?”

You didn’t have to ask what she meant.

You turned to her, fingers brushing absentmindedly through her blue strands. “Every day.”

Jinx swallowed.

She sat up, looking at you—really looking—and her voice was barely a whisper when she said—

“What if we tried again?”

Your breath caught.

Jinx rushed ahead before you could answer.

“Not—not to replace her,” she stammered. “Never that. Just… I dunno. We had a good thing. A great thing. And I think we could—” She exhaled sharply, eyes darting away. “Forget it. Dumb idea.”

You caught her chin gently, making her meet your gaze.

“It’s not dumb,” you said. “It’s perfect.”

Jinx blinked.

Then—slowly—her lips curled into a small, hopeful grin.

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

BONUS!!!!!

⊹────⊹ ꯭┄ׁ┄ ʚ͜♡͜ɞ ┄ׁ┄꯭ ⊹────⊹

It took time.

But one day, finally, you held her.

Tiny. Fragile. A weight so light it barely felt real in your arms.

You stared down at the baby, throat tight, heart pounding in a way you hadn’t felt in years.

Jinx hovered beside you, practically vibrating.

“D’you think she’s defective?” she muttered.

You snorted. “Jinx.”

“She hasn’t said anything.”

“She was literally just born.”

Jinx huffed, poking the baby’s cheek. “Still. I expected more personality.”

The baby let out a soft, sleepy sigh.

Jinx melted.

“…Okay, that was kinda cute.”

You shook your head, smiling. Then, quietly, you whispered—

“Isha.”

Jinx froze.

The boat went silent, save for the distant sound of the waves against the docks.

You looked up, meeting Jinx’s eyes.

Her breath hitched.

For a moment, neither of you spoke.

Then—slowly—Jinx exhaled, her lips curling into something small, soft.

She reached out, tracing a gentle finger over the baby’s tiny fist.

“Isha,” she repeated, voice barely above a whisper.

Like it was something sacred.

You nodded, eyes stinging.

“She deserves to be remembered…both kids need to be remembered”

Jinx swallowed, blinking rapidly.

Then, suddenly, she grinned.

“Well,” she said, nudging your shoulder. “Let’s just hope this one doesn’t start a prank war.”

You chuckled, pressing a kiss to Isha’s tiny forehead.

“No promises.”

Jinx smirked.

Then she leaned in, brushing her lips against yours, whispering—

“We made it.”

You smiled.

“Yeah,” you murmured. “We did.”

And as Isha let out a tiny yawn, curling into your chest, the past finally let go.

The war was over.

The ghosts were gone.

And the life you always wanted?

It was here.

It was real.

And it was yours.

I love making angst and fluff stories!! They are so fun to craft!!

I want sleep.

#arcane x reader #arcane x y/n #jinx arcane #jinx lol #jinx league of legends #jinx #x you #x reader #arcane x you #x y/n #jinx x reader #isha arcane #jinx and isha #powder #isha is alive #arcane #arcane season 2 #arcane s2 #arcame

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yuutaok · 1 year ago

Text

⊹ ‧₊˚✿ Spring Leaves, But I Never Will

Yuuta Okkotsu x Reader

In the eerie mountain forest, you seek to find what is missing. Lost and disoriented, you encounter a mysterious boy with eyes like the dead, his presence is captivating. With a gentle hand, he beckons you, and you follow.

⊹ ‧₊˚✿ Word Count: ~4.4K

⊹ ‧₊˚✿ Content Warnings: 18+ MDNI (Minors Do Not Interact), P in V, AFAB! Reader, prone bone, unprotected sex, creampies, posessiveness, supernatural/paranormal stuff happens, open-ended ending, Reader is lost in a forest and meets Yuuta, Yuuta is a freak

⊹ ‧₊˚✿ Author's note: Hiii I am back with a vengeance. Belated birthday fic for Yuuta ♡ Life exploded me so I never got the chance to finish until now. Also, I would like to thank Sen (@/ banjjakz) for inspiring some of the horror aspects of this <3 They have such a lovely way of writing such mysterious horror that I deeply wanted to try my hand at, so please go read their Yuuta fics bc they are sooooo delicious ok I'll stop swooning now byeeeeee

Lost amidst the dense, foreboding forests of the mountains, you trudged forward, the fading sunlight casting long shadows across the winding trail. Your heart felt heavy with the weight of recent events, the memory of your painful breakup still fresh in your mind. It had only been a couple of days, of course your heart would still hurt and your hands would still shake. And still, the need to escape, to clear your head and find solace amidst the solitude of nature, had driven you to embark on this day-hike alone.

The townsfolk often whispered about this mountain as a haunt for the heartbroken.

And so, here you were.

The hike was pleasant. You took the time to leisurely look at every interesting formed rock or beautiful sprouting flower that you had stumbled upon. Spring had just begun and it felt nice to be in the calm serenity of nature. You took care to not stray too far from the beaten path but still found your way crunching through the trees to look at specimens that caught your eye. It was a great way to get your mind off of things, to forget about life for just a moment.

But now, as the sky darkened and the woods grew eerily silent around you, regret gnawed at the edges of your resolve. Perhaps venturing into the wilderness alone had been a mistake, a reckless act born of heartache. Panic tightened its grip on your chest as you realized that dusk was fast approaching, and you had yet to find your way back to civilization.

With each step you took through the dense undergrowth of the forest, the sense of urgency weighed heavy on your shoulders. Nervously, you glanced at the sky, watching as the sun dipped lower and lower, casting long shadows that danced ominously through the trees. Hope flickered like a dying flame within you, faltering as the daylight waned faster than anticipated.

Your mind wandered to the rumors that had long circulated about the mountain, tales of heartbroken souls seeking solace among the towering trees, only to vanish without a trace.

It was said that the forest held secrets whispered confessions etched into the bark of the old oak trees, and love letters left behind by those who had come seeking solace from their pain. But these were not ordinary declarations of affection; they were haunting, twisted reflections of despair, each word filled with grief, obsession, and heartbreak. You have heard people say that love is the worst curse of all.

Some claimed to have heard mournful voices echoing through the woods, the ghostly whispers of lovers calling out into the darkness, their cries fading into gusts of wind and rustling leaves. Others spoke of strange symbols carved into the earth, cryptic messages left behind by those who had succumbed to the forest's embrace.

You still had decided to come, despite the unsubstantiated rumors that were whispered by the old grannies in the surrounding town. You’d be damned if you suffocated under the weight of your heartache. But as you delved deeper and deeper into the forest, you couldn’t shake the feeling of being watched— honestly, maybe the old ladies knew something you didn’t.

Panic clawed at the edges of your mind, threatening to consume you whole. Desperate, you called out into the silent woods, your voice echoing into the vast expanse of darkness that surrounded you, “Hello…? Is anybody out there? Can anyone hear me?”

But the only response was the feeling of eyes on the back of your head and the haunting whisper of the wind through the branches, carrying with it a sense of desolation that chilled you to the bone.

With each passing moment, the forest seemed to close in around you, its shadows stretching like grasping fingers eager to ensnare their prey. You were never quite fond of the dark.

Heart pounding, you broke into a run, stumbling through the underbrush in a frantic search for anything familiar. Each rustle of leaves and snap of twigs beneath your feet sent a jolt of fear coursing through your veins, your breaths coming in ragged gasps as you raced against the encroaching darkness.

And then, just as panic threatened to consume you whole, you burst through a thicket of bushes, only to collide with an unexpected figure standing in your path. The air left your lungs as you fell flat on your ass.

You looked up at what, or who, you had just crashed head-on into.

It was a boy, his dark eyes gleaming with an unsettling intensity as he regarded you with an enigmatic smile, despite you just pummeling into him with your full force. The shock of the encounter left you speechless, frozen in place as the realization dawned that you were not alone in the woods after all.

You made eye contact with the stranger, and a chill swept through the air, sending a shiver down your spine. His dark hair fell in tousled waves, framing his pale face in an unsettling contrast. His tired eyes bore into you with an intensity that made your skin crawl. A curtain of bangs parted across his forehead, framing his features in a shadowy veil. His lips twisted into a smile and held a hint of something that lurked just beneath the surface.

There was an undeniable aura of unease that surrounded the boy, a sense of foreboding that lingered in the air like a haunting melody. As he extended a hand towards you, offering salvation in the darkness, you couldn't shake the feeling that there was something deeply unsettling about him.

"Are you lost?" he asked, his voice low and soothing. "It's dangerous to be out here alone at night. I can lead you to safety."

You looked up at the stranger incredulously, as if you would be dumb enough to follow a stranger you met out in the woods!

Sending your apprehension, the raven-haired boy smiles kindly, “I promise, I don’t bite. Please, it’s getting late and I don’t think I could live with myself if I left you out here by yourself.”

Weighing out your options, you realized that maybe this was your best choice. It’s either that or freezing out in the woods, or better yet being eaten by some wild animal that you hardly can find yourself against.

You looked around, dazed. With darkness closing in around you and no other options in sight, you accepted his offer.

“Alright,” you sighed. “But please don’t try anything, I’ve been told I have a killer right hook.”

He looks at you, obviously amused, “Of course, I’ll be on my best behavior.”

And begrudgingly you had to admit, despite everything in your body screaming for you to keep running, you felt completely and utterly relieved to see him.

As you followed the raven-haired boy deeper into the woods, the sense of unease only intensified, wrapping around you like a suffocating cloak. "Where are we going?" you finally asked, your voice trembling slightly with apprehension.

His dark eyes flickered with an unreadable emotion as he turned to face you, his expression guarded yet strangely calm. "To my cabin," he replied, his voice low and steady. "It's not far from here. You'll be safe there for the night. You can rest for as long as you need to."

Though his words offered reassurance, there was a lingering doubt in the back of your mind. You had heard stories of people disappearing in these woods, never to be seen again, and the thought sent a chill down your spine.

There was something about the dark-haired man that unsettled you, something that whispered of hidden dangers lurking beneath his calm exterior. And even so, something about him drew you in, made you feel so immediately safe with him.

"Who are you?" you pressed, your voice wavering with a mix of fear and curiosity. "And why were you out here alone?"

Yuuta hesitated for a moment as if weighing his words carefully. "My name is Yuuta Okkotsu," he said finally, his gaze meeting yours with an intensity that sent a shiver down your spine. "I live in the woods, away from civilization. As for why I was out here...let's just say I have my reasons."

His cryptic response only fueled your apprehension, but as the darkness closed in around you and the sound of rustling leaves filled the air, you realized that you had little choice but to trust him, at least for now. With a nod of reluctant acceptance, you followed Yuuta deeper into the woods, praying that you had not just made a grave mistake.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

His cabin appeared suddenly, a rustic structure nestled amidst the towering trees, its windows glowing with the warm light of a fire within.

"I don't usually invite strangers into my home," Yuuta admitted, his gaze lingering on you with a mix of curiosity and something you couldn’t quite place your finger on. "But I can't leave you out here alone. You're welcome to stay until morning." Though grateful for his offer of shelter, you couldn't shake the feeling of unease that settled over you like a shroud.

There was something about Yuuta's demeanor, a subtle intensity in his gaze, that sent shivers down your spine.

You stepped into Yuuta's cabin, grateful for the warmth and shelter it offered. The cozy interior enveloped you in a comforting embrace, dispelling some of the tension that had gripped you since your encounter in the woods. It was humorous actually, how warm the cabin felt in comparison to the uneasiness its owner gave you.

“Home sweet home,” Yuuta said as he took your coat and nodded his head for you to follow him.

Yuuta wasted no time in playing the role of a gracious host, offering you a change of clothes and access to his shower. His bathroom was neat, he didn’t have much, just the basics, but it was still appreciated nonetheless.

As the hot water washed away the dirt and grime of the forest, you felt a sense of relaxation seeping into your bones, soothing the frayed edges of your nerves.

Emerging from the shower feeling refreshed and revitalized. You found Yuuta busy in the kitchen, a delicious aroma of spices and savory delights wafting through the air.

As you peered over his shoulder, you caught a glimpse of the bubbling pot on the stove, filled with rich, fragrant curry. The sight stirred memories of comforting meals shared with loved ones, and you couldn't help but feel a pang of nostalgia. "That smells amazing," you murmured, your mouth watering at the thought of indulging in the hearty dish.

Yuuta glanced up from his cooking, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "It's just a simple curry," he said modestly, though there was a hint of pride in his voice. "But I find that simple comforts are often the most satisfying."

You offered to help, eager to contribute to the meal in some way, but Yuuta shook his head gently. "No need to trouble yourself," he insisted, his gaze softening as he gestured for you to take a seat at the table. "Relax and settle down. I'll take care of everything."

Though you hesitated for a moment, the warmth of Yuuta's demeanor and the promise of a delicious meal were too enticing to resist. With a grateful smile, you sank into a chair, content to watch as Yuuta worked his culinary magic, the comforting rhythm of his movements lulling you into a sense of peace and contentment.

As you settled into Yuuta's cabin, you couldn't help but take in your surroundings with a sense of curiosity. The interior was simple yet cozy, with polished wooden floors that creaked softly underfoot and walls adorned with faded photographs and intricate tapestries.

The cabin had a rustic charm to it, its bare furnishings lending an air of simplicity to the space. Yet, despite its minimalistic design, everything seemed meticulously arranged, each item in its rightful place. There was a sense of order and precision that spoke to Yuuta's meticulous nature, a trait that you found oddly comforting.

On the shelves lining the walls, you noticed an eclectic array of books, their well-worn spines bearing the marks of countless readings. From classic literature to obscure texts on folklore and mysticism, the collection spoke of a curious mind.

Nearby, a shelf displayed a collection of handmade erasers, their vibrant colors and whimsical shapes. You couldn't help but smile at the sight of these charming little creatures. There was a sense of warmth and homeliness to Yuuta's cabin that made you feel strangely at ease. It was as if the space itself radiated a sense of comfort and belonging, welcoming you with open arms into its cozy embrace.

Before you knew it, the food was done and Yuuta served you a steaming plate.

“Thank you for the meal,” you said, nervous.

“It’s my pleasure,” Yuuta replied.

With the two of you sitting down to eat, you found yourself opening up to Yuuta in a way you hadn't expected. You told him about your recent breakup, the pain and heartache that had driven you to seek solace in the wilderness.

Yuuta listened attentively, his dark eyes reflecting a depth of understanding that surprised you. "It's dangerous to be out in the woods alone," he said softly, his voice tinged with a note of concern. "Who knows what evils could be lurking in the darkness? I'm glad I found you when I did." A chill ran down your spine.

Though he had shown you nothing but kindness, you couldn’t quite shake the feeling of anxiety that crept up around Yuuta's presence. He was good company, however, and you worked hard to ignore the way your hands clammed up and each hair on your skin stood up when he leaned in closer to speak with you. You chalked it up to your nerves.

The two of you continued to converse, him asking you more about your life and you asking about his. As Yuuta shared snippets of his past, you found yourself drawn to him in a way you couldn't quite explain. There was a sort of charm to him, an undeniable allure. Despite the lingering doubts that were dancing in the back of your mind, you couldn't deny the attraction you had towards him. You felt like a moth catching fire as it approached an open flame.

With a sigh, Yuuta leaned back against the cushions, his gaze drifting to the dancing flames of his fireplace as if lost in thought. "You know," he begins, his voice a low, melodic murmur that sends shivers down your spine, "I wasn't always a hermit living in the woods." His words hung in the air, heavy with unspoken sorrow.

"What happened?" you ventured softly, your voice barely more than a whisper, to not disturb the mood.

Yuuta's gaze flickered to yours, a hint of sadness lurking in the depths of his dark eyes. "I used to live in the city, surrounded by noise and chaos," he admitted, his words tinged with bitterness. "But... I lost someone very dear to me." His voice trailed off, grief etched into the lines of his face.

"She was my childhood sweetheart," he continued, his voice barely above a whisper as if speaking the words aloud pains him. "We were inseparable, bound together by pure, untainted, love.”

A heavy silence fell between you, broken only by the crackling of the fire and the soft rustle of the wind outside. "She was taken from me," Yuuta murmurs, his voice thick with emotion. "And I... I couldn't bear to stay in that world any longer."

As he spoke, you sensed the weight of his sorrow pressing down on him, a burden too heavy for one mere person to bear alone. "I tried to move on, to forget her and the pain of losing her," Yuuta admitted, his voice raw with emotion. "But no matter how hard I tried, I could never escape the memories of our time together."

“So I left," he confessed, "I left everything behind and retreated into the solitude of the forest, hoping to find something to fill the hole in my heart.”

His words hung in the air, heavy with the weight of his sorrow, and you could not help but feel a surge of empathy for the man before you. At that moment, you realize that Yuuta and you are not so different after all, both haunted by heartbreak, seeking solace in the expanse of trees. In his eyes, you saw a reflection of your desires, a longing for connection and understanding.

But even as your heart yearned to unravel the secrets hidden within Yuuta’s dark and mangled heart, a sense of unease lingered at the edges of your consciousness. There was still something unsettling about the way the shadows seemed to dance around him, as if alive with an energy of their own. Something you couldn’t quite put your finger on…

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

As the night stretched on, the air thick with a palpable tension, you felt a strange sense of drowsiness wash over you. Your eyelids grew heavy with exhaustion as you let out a quiet yawn.

With a soft smile, Yuuta reached out to you. His was touch gentle, yet firm, possessive even. You felt yourself lean into his touch as if he weaved an invisible spell around you.

"You look tired," he murmured, his voice a soothing melody that seemed to echo with the whispers of the forest itself. "Come with me, let me take care of you."

His words washed over you like a warm embrace, dispelling the last glimmers of doubt and fear as you allow yourself to be guided by his steady hand. With a silent nod, you allowed Yuuta to lead you to the bedroom, the warmth of his presence enveloping you like a protective shield as you sank into the soft embrace of the bed.

The room was bathed in the soft glow of moonlight filtering through the curtains, casting shadows across the walls like dancing spirits. He leaned over you, his body flush against yours, his hand steady and reassuring against your skin.

As you lay there, the haze of drowsiness clouding your senses, you felt Yuuta begin to pull away. You grasped at the hem of his shirt, silently begging him not to go.

His features were veiled by the shroud of night, his smile, though unseen, seemed to materialize in the darkness. With a gentle pull, you drew him down to lay beside you.

"Do you want me to stay?" Yuuta's voice, a soft murmur, caressed your ear as his head nestled against your shoulder.

"Yes," you found yourself pleading, the words slipping from your lips in a whispered plea. "Don't leave."

Yuuta's lips brushed gently against your neck, his touch tender yet possessive. "I won’t,” he murmured, “I won’t ever leave,” his voice a velvet whisper that sent shivers down your spine. “I’ll keep you safe, I promise,”

In your sleepy state, you found yourself melting into his touch. Yuuta's kisses trailed a path of fire along your skin. Each kiss was a feather-light caress that seeped into each layer of your skin, burning you from the inside out.

Slowly, he moved up your neck, his lips leaving a trail of warmth in their wake as he explored every inch of your skin with adoration.

As Yuuta's lips found their way to your jaw, you felt yourself melting into his embrace, lost in the dizzying whirlwind that you now understood as Yuuta Okkotsu.

His movements were calm and deliberate, his touch gentle yet commanding as he explored every curve and contour of your body with dedicated devotion. Each touch left you yearning for more. You would die if it meant you could feel this loved forever.

Soon enough, Yuuta’s lips found yours, his kisses both tender and possessive, his passion evident in the way he claimed your lips.

As his lips danced with yours, you found yourself with the thought of never being apart from him. It filled you with a sense of completion. You could feel the depth of his devotion. Could he feel yours?

As if to answer your question, Yuuta’s touch became more urgent, his hands roaming over your body with a ravenous hunger. You felt happy that you could be consumed so ardently, that you found yourself secretly hoping that you at least tasted good.

Breaking out of your thoughts, you realized Yuuta was removing your borrowed clothes bit by bit. He made sure you were left in your panties.

His strong hands moved to caress your bare skin, his fingers leaving imprints on your body. Yuuta’s nails and grip dug into your skin as he kissed you. His hands moved to explore every curve and contour of your body with a reverence that bordered on worship. You wondered if he was trying to memorize every inch of you.

You leaned up to deepen the kiss, which only furthered Yuuta’s excitement. His lips moved hungrily against yours, his touch seeming eager, desperate, or perhaps so incredibly lonely, even.

Yuuta’s wet kisses left you dizzy, your senses were overwhelmed by him. Noticing the strain between his legs, you reached your hands down to unbutton his pants & paw at his boxers. Yuuta obliged by tossing them off to the side with your lost articles of clothing.

You moved to guide his hips to meet yours. With him between your legs, you moved to grind against him. You both gasped as his hard member pressed against your soaked panties.

You look up to see his reaction but notice something in Yuuta’s eyes become dark. His grip on your hips became tighter as his nails dug crescents into your soft skin.

Yuuta took this moment to grind himself deeper into you, his cock sliding between the lips of your pussy soaked panties. You let out a wanton moan, grinding back against him, desperate for any form of friction or release. You felt his cock rub against your swollen clit, moving back and forth in a way that left you crying out for more.

As Yuuta continued to tease you, he paused for a moment, his breath warm against your ear as he spoke in a low voice, "Do you want this?”

You shivered, a chill running down your spine.

With a hitched breath, you nodded.

“Will you be mine?" He asked, his eyes peering deep and dark into your own. You felt like he could see right into you like he was clawing his way into your soul to make a home in it.

You were okay with that.

You nodded again, “Yes, I’ll always be yours.”

With a glassy darkness in his eyes, he flipped you over onto your stomach, his movements rough and commanding as he positioned himself behind you. He tsk’ed as he ripped your ruined panties off, throwing off into the darkness of the room.

Well, you didn’t need those, anyway.

You could feel the heat of his breath against your ear as he whispered, “I’ll make it so you can’t ever think to leave,” sending shivers down your spine.

Yuuta trailed hot kisses along your skin as he positioned himself above you. With a low moan, he pressed himself against you, the throbbing hardness of his member seeking entrance to your dripping heat.

And then, with a thrust, he entered you. Yuuta’s hands gripped your ass as he slowly sunk his hard length into your wet core. You sucked in a breath, a wave of pleasure crashing over you as he filled your pussy completely. He was big. So much bigger than you anticipated.

‘We fit together perfectly’, you thought to yourself.

His pace was slow, with him getting used to the tightness of your cunt. You looked up at him with adoration as he leaned over your shoulder to give you a sloppy open-mouthed kiss. A trail of saliva left between your lips when you parted.

Yuuta’s spent no extra moment finding his stride, his movements becoming rough and unyielding as he fucks you with such devoted reverence. You’re helpless. All you could do was beg for more as you gulped in the air.

It’s obscene, the way he makes you moan. You’re powerless to fight against the way he makes your heart skip and your stomach churn. You feel on fire like he’s burning you to a crisp of ash and dust only to resurrect you again if only to just keep fucking you.

Yuuta’s movements become more urgent and the tension between you reaches its peak. With each thrust, you feel yourself teetering on the edge of ecstasy, your senses overwhelmed by Yuuta.

Suddenly, you feel a surge of pleasure coursing through your veins, your body convulsing with the intensity of your release. With a cry, you shatter into a million pieces, the only thing able to leave your mouth is the chant of, “Yuuta-- Ah, Yuuta, Yuuta.”

“I’m here,” he replies, voice strained feeling your pussy tighten around his cock, “I’m right here.” Feeling the wetness and tightness of your cum triggers Yuuta’s climax, and with a stifled moan, he follows suit, pouring his hot cum into you.

Yuuta pulls you into his arms, his leaky cock still hard inside of you. Your dark-haired lover kisses your temple and leaves sweet whispers across the sweat of your skin. He holds you close, entwining you into him as your eyelids get heavy and you feel sleep take over your spent body.

You feel loved.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

In your dreams, you find yourself lost in a labyrinth of shadows, the air thick with the scent of decay. Whispers echo through the darkness, taunting you with half-formed promises and cryptic warnings.

You stumble through the endless maze, searching for an escape, but the shadows seem to shift and twist, leading you further into the depths of your despair.

And then, just when you think you can bear it no longer, you see him. Yuuta stands before you, his dark eyes looking into yours as he reaches out to you with a hand shrouded in darkness.

He whispers something, you don’t understand. But you still reach out, taking his hand into yours.

You awaken with a start, the echoes of your nightmare still lingering in the recesses of your mind.

Heart pounding, you sit up in bed, the room bathed in the soft glow of moonlight filtering through the curtains.

Yuuta is gone, but his warmth remains.

A sense of foreboding settles over you like a shroud.

#₊˚ 彡✩ ₊˚ writing #⋆୨✿୧⋆ jjk #⋆୨♡୧⋆ yuuta #yuta okkotsu x reader #yuuta okkotsu x reader #yuta okkotsu x you #yuuta okkotsu x you #jjk x reader #jjk smut #yuuta smut #EXTREMELY BELATED BDAY FIC LETS GOOOOO #idk if u will see this but #hiii sen i hope u dont mind the mention o///o your newest Yuuta fics had me in such a chokehold that i started this…#but then u finished my comm and my braincell was literally screaming #I NEEEED TO WRIT EJ NEEED I NEED I NEED #so basicallt thank u for making me insane

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mangooes · 28 days ago

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Are you alive?

The sinking feeling of dying, living, dying, living again and again.

The distant light flickering,

ahh… is it hope? despair? … .I’m lost in between.

So, are you alive?

The world is shining brighter….but why is it that I’m running out of breath?

The harder I run, the harder I chase, the further my dreams drift away.

Chasing nothing but an endless illusion.

The truth is, I want to be happier more than you could ever know.

You feel it too don’t you?

“Let’s just run away, please? together?“

I reached out my hand, inviting. Your eyes tell me everything I need to know.

You never took it, you never did look at me once.

My lungs are desperate for air, to breathe, to live. But what can I do, when dying is the only thing I know?

The truth is, I want to live more than you could ever know.

Is it because of her? Is it because I was never fated to be with you?

I never blamed her. Why should I? I have no reason to.

The harder I run, the harder I fall, the further my reality drifts away.

The tears I shed, because of you. The pain I feel because of you. The torture i endured because of you…..

Oh don’t you cry, it’s all a nightmare.

My world’s the sunlight of my dreams.

Then I realized, all the happiness I deserve, needed to obtain, was on the ground all along.

So this time, I’ll shine on my own. Right here, right now, alive, breathing.

My senses awakening, the numb i feel, the heartbreak i went through, i don’t need them anymore. I don’t need you anymore.

The truth is, I want to feel alive more than you could ever know.

Running towards a bigger dream, a reality for me without you.

Falling into a bigger despair, sinking deeper and deeper.

Because when I wake up tomorrow, I hope all of this, I hope the vision of you and I, it's all just a mere dream.

Till I’m awake.

So, once again let me ask you this… are you alive?

In which (Name) has lived through different lifetimes. Seeking love, happiness, a happily ever after. In every life, she always died, it was never her from the start. So this time, never again would she live for the nightmares she had endured. No more.

Xavier Zayne Rafayel Sylus Caleb

Heya everyone! this is my new project for the time being, because i have lots of ideas for this. This, is heavily inspired by triple S's are you alive askdjsadkasndaks. Uh each lis has their own route for the flashbacks and stuff, and ill figure sum out when the main story line starts lol. Ive finished writing raff's cuz his new myth just came out and i am so so down bad. This is just a bit of a prologue yk not rlly but yeah! have funn guys

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fookinhellcurlyyy · 4 months ago

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hi my love! i hope all is well with you. i need to vent ab something that has been bothering me for a while. first they were dragging h in the press and now their target is louis, by saying louis never wants to get back together w the band and that hes estranged from h. first the narrative w h is that he’s too big of a solo artist to get back together w the boys and now louis doesn’t wanna get back with the band bc he’s moved on and he’s “estranged” from h.

i definitely believe that louis probably said at one point recently that he didn’t wanna go back to the band but i don’t think it’s for the reasons that the article is claiming. he (and most likely the others as well) probably don’t wanna get back together without liam.

when zayn left in 2015, liam said it best. he said we are not one direction without zayn. he said they just go by louis, liam, niall and harry. there will never be a one direction without liam. when zayn left i felt the same way. it’s those five boys or nothing at all. when they released the joint statement they released it as louis, zayn, niall and harry. one direction sadly will never be the same ever again and it’s heartbreaking.

i also hate how some people are like “harry, niall and louis are the only ones left”. like no zayn and liam will always be part of one direction. just bc zayn left doesn’t mean he should never be a member of the band ever again. he’ll always be apart of one direction, same with liam. liam passed away and was with the band before the hiatus.

whatever louis, harry, niall and zayn choose to do i will always support them. if they never get back together as a band i would totally understand and respect that. i just hope for their sake they have reconciled any differences they might’ve had with each other and they can be friends again (whether it’s publicly or privately). you can tell they all really loved and adored each other. their bond was so pure.

I'm doing great, lovely anon! Thank you. ♡

First of all, I just want to say that the media headlines these days are utter BS. They love twisting words and narratives for clicks (which, well, is their job). I wouldn't pay too much attention to them. I only keep track of them because I know they might play into a bigger picture in the future—like you said, why were there so many smear campaign headlines against H before? Then they falsely used his name, and now they’re doing the same to L.

EDIT: Adding @delicateperspective's comment here re alleged articles (I haven't read all of them myself but I saw the backlash from The Standard's article):

I just want to point out that I checked ever recent article and there’s nothing that isn’t regurgitating the one quote that his PR manager gave that asshat at The Standard while telling him not to ask about Louis’ grief. The whole “"Louis just despairs. He could never get up there and sing as part of the band after what has happened." thing. Everyone from People, The Sun, and The Mirror are running the quote into the ground and making it a whole article by quoting past stuff like Louis’ memorial post and that one terrible Sun article that Louis told us was bullshit “how drugs and ego destroyed 1D” or whatever the title was. One thing you can rely on mainstream media for is if they get a sound bite of Louis’ grief or trauma -they run with it because it gets clicks. Same for Harry’s ego. There’s no new actual quotes or information or even rumors. Just Simon Jones or one of his assistants making an offhand comment to get The Standard to not exploit his grief (which they did anyway).

BACK TO MY POINT:

And I agree—there will always be five One Direction members. This might be indirectly related, but I answered an anon about grief and the idea of 1D never coming back. I’m still hopeful that they will, because they've all said so, and I feel like Liam's passing has pushed them to reconcile their differences—at least as much as we've seen with L and Zayn (who had the biggest fallout). H and L are together, so they're definitely alright. Niall and Liam were always the same. Their relationships seem just as strong as before (in the band), even if they all have different careers to focus on. We’ve seen Niall with H, Liam with L, Liam with N, N with H, and so on. When Zouis reunited earlier this year, it felt like the world was finally healing. They're older and wiser now, and while what happened to Liam isn't the best circumstance to have triggered it, I'm grateful to witness the healing and reconnection happening between them.

What keeps me anchored in this fandom—as both a Directioner and a Larrie—is staying updated while learning to push away the negativity that can come with it. We barely see the reality of their lives. We don’t know them personally, and neither does the media. The media paints them however they want, depending on the circumstances, and the general public blindly believes it. That's where we come in—not getting swayed and standing our ground, because we know they aren't the people they make them out to be.

FAITH IN THE FUTURE WOOHOOO!!! *fandom-fueled scream*

#anon #answered #♡ chats

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vaguely-concerned · 2 years ago

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Thoughts upon finishing Master and Apprentice! A good double read with Padawan; the ending of that leaving Obi-Wan slightly hopeful about his relationship to Qui-Gon makes for a very sad yet hilarious ‘Local Padawan loses last little bit of hope he didn’t even know he still had’ sort of vibe to the beginning of this one, which is set one (1) year later and Obi-Wan is So Done with Qui-Gon’s whole deal by this point (correctly btw). Also if you can’t tell already I will not be objective or free from bias in this because I love Obi-Wan so much and some of the stuff Qui-Gon pulled made me incandescent with rage on his behalf <3 let’s go

- 'oh obi-wan, you're so mature for your age, I keep forgetting you're only seventeen years old,' qui-gon says, word for word, repeatedly, in master and apprentice, apparently willfully deaf to the industrial-sized warning bells about their relationship dynamic that should probably be setting off in his head. qui-gon believes in vibing with the living force and being in the moment right up until the moment requires him to pay attention to the kid he's raising for more than oh, one and a half minutes of self-effacing inner monologue and then he's like 'well unfortunately there is simply no time for that right now there are prophecies to be pondered'. (the fact that the admission that obi-wan has essentially been left to raise himself emotionally and the resigned reframing of that as 'and maybe that is a good thing!' is part of the olive branch they extend to each other towards the end... will my sadness never end)

- most of all it's so heartbreaking to me that qui-gon seemingly never understands just how much obi-wan as a person is rooted deeply in shame. I don't think that's a feeling that's particularly prevalent in qui-gon's own inner world so he doesn't recognize how central it is in obi-wan's psychology and completely misunderstands and misaligns with him again and again and again and then gets annoyed with obi-wan for that, thus making the shame even deeper. doubly painful because he does see the way rael lives so much of his life out of shame now and feels sad about it, but can't see the way he's contributing to obi-wan doing so. this is what fucks me up so bad about the generational trauma in star wars -- no one here meant to be cruel. for all his faults I do think qui-gon does love obi-wan and doesn't mean to hurt him. but the original sin of the prequels as far as I'm concerned is qui-gon tenderly drying away obi-wan's tears as he's dying even while completely failing to see him, his eyes too fixed on anakin's future to actually be with obi-wan, who's there right now and needs him.

these are simply very different people trying and failing to understand each other, and the harm that can still happen in that… 'if you love me, you don't love me in a way I understand', all the way through the disaster line, even when the love is there, it is there, that’s what hurts the most, it just doesn’t reach where it’s needed, there’s a connection that doesn’t happen. (ironically I think ahsoka doesn't doubt that anakin loves her, it's just uh everything else that went down. so y'know family curse broken! new even more fucked up curse achieved now with more child murder. I mean there already was some child murder in this family but anakin upped the game exponentially)

- a lil guy who's basically tarzan except the gorillas are replaced with protocol droids and then he becomes a jewel thief is one of the funniest star wars concepts I've ever heard and I hope pax and rahara get to pop up in more star wars media, they’re great fun. (also an idea I think would be super fun to make a character/campaign around in Edge of the Empire or something, everyone playing different droids and then one person being robo-parented lol)

- was not prepared to have rael posit a theory of what essentially seems to be the jedi version of predestination in his despair, but I do love to see it haha. especially interesting since he, qui-gon and dooku must be among the people alive who've studied the prophecies in most depth, and they've all reached different conclusions -- dooku decides to join the war of light and dark on the side of dark for some reason, qui-gon (possibly the stubbornest fucker the jedi order ever produced) 'turns towards the light not to win some great cosmic game, but because it is the light', and rael in the middle falls into the depressed apathy of 'it doesn't matter what we do here, the outcome is already decided; for there to be true balance there has to be as much dark as light in the world so we're fucked'. but in the end he does take qui-gon's words to heart and turns towards the light rather than accepting dooku's offer, even if he might not believe it makes a difference in the long run. man I love rael. hobo-looking sonofabitch living in a castle for eight years will just suddenly fling out some deep jedi theology huh

- master rael 'I'm gonna make up for the big terrible mistake I made on accident by making an even bigger more premeditated mistake on purpose' averross (affectionate)

- the added layer to dooku’s fascination with prophecy after reading dooku: jedi lost — that his best friend in the world was a seer who couldn’t turn it off and it destroyed him……….. dooku you’re not getting him back if you just understand what he saw you know that right

- the more I read of master and apprentice the more I realize that the reason yoda and qui-gon don't get along is that they're two of the judgiest bitches the jedi order ever produced. They’re like two cats scowling judgmentally at each other from opposite sides of the room pretending to live and let live while going ‘you’re wrong tho’ internally.

- I dunk on him constantly (not entirely without affection, however grudging), but Qui-Gon is genuinely a really interesting character. He’s so… he’s so. He’s infuriating but he’s infuriating in an equidistant sort of way. You feel me. He’s pissing everyone off equally and he just doesn’t care because again, he’s the stubbornest judgiest bitch around and thinks he’s right all the time. I would be free to just enjoy his ornery ‘no actually I’m right about this’ ass and the chaos he wreaks so much more if Obi-Wan didn’t have to live with the emotional consequences of it lol.

- poor rael closing in on fifty with his puriteen middle-aged little brother clutching pearls about his getting laid once in a blue moon fhdskjahfas. again a really interesting insight into different ways of interpreting the jedi code, though, I love seeing the jedi not be an ideological monolith. to be fair to rael, having sex sometimes does seem to be the indulgence he has that causes the least conflict with his principles or loyalties so you know what honestly force speed you my friend why not. (and then there's qui-gon 'noooo sex is only okay if you're In Love (implied: like I was)!!!' jinn lmao. I wonder what he'd think of anakin and padme's relationship, would that pass the 'being sufficiently purely in love' test for him) I do like how consistently it’s shown that rael doesn’t mean to be cruel or unkind in anything he says, he always notices something landing too close to home and then pulls carefully back from it instead of pushing on. He seems to be the emotional intelligence powerhouse in this lineage (as long as he doesn’t have his feelings too tangled up in something, at least).

Dooku: jedi lost also shows us that dooku absolutely knows rael is out there in the galaxy laying pipe and is, at worst, softly amused by it. So in this little family unit it’s only qui-gon losing his mind over it fjsdkafa I’m so used to having qui-gon be the wild card maverick compared to obi-wan ‘*in tears* but what are the RULES master’ kenobi, it’s so fucking funny that within the context that raised him he’s the stick in the mud

I guess. the book also had a plot and it was not bad! some interesting insights about how the republic interacted with the big corporations and just how fucked everything already was by this point. I'm a pretty character-driven reader so that's what sticks with me for the most part

- obi-wan’s big teenage rebellion here being that sometimes. Occasionally. When he really loses his temper and gets hot under the collar. He’ll say something slightly passive aggressive out loud instead of keeping it contained inside his head. And qui-gon still can’t handle that gracefully AT ALL he snaps right back fdjskfhas. (I guess he also snitches on qui-gon to the council but well, you know, qui-gon was breaking republic law pretty brazenly at that point I think that moves beyond teenage angst and into ‘...master that’s a wholeass felony’ territory). Obi-Wan does go for a couple of low blows, but like. Nothing that’s not actually true, is the thing. And mostly he blames himself for not being good enough, because surely if he were qui gon wouldn’t treat him like this. Augh. hngh. Pain. suffering.

- I am not one of the people who think everything would have automatically been just hunky-dory if only qui-gon lived and could have been anakin's master (in fact I would have given it a 50/50 chance of going exponentially worse way faster; being more similar as people is not always a guarantee that a relationship will go smoother and qui-gon is an incredibly difficult man to be close to for any length of time), but the way this book basically presents how the dynamic between dooku, rael and qui-gon could have gone on in the next generation too... it would have been incredibly unfair to obi-wan (as always I think that's just an universal constant lmao) but I think the odds of it turning out okay would have been better if you had him in the mix to run crisis control for both qui-gon and anakin, as he does for each of them individually as best he can anyway. at least he could have been free to be anakin's brother and friend purely in that scenario, without all the added mess of grief and having to take on a parental role there so young. he does basically fill that role in ahsoka's apprenticeship, after all.

- qui-gon finally hugging rael before he leaves the planet (and especially since when they were younger he wanted to, but held himself back from it)... that's still his big brother even with all the shit that's happened since ;_____; when someone teaches you how to swim (literally and symbolically) that shit stays with you I suppose

Relatedly: DOOKU getting hugged, and gladly. What the fuck. Are you all seeing this shit. I’m gonna cry or laugh I’m not sure which one why am I emotionally invested in the galaxy's most problematic grandpa now this sucks

#and that's the power of star wars baybey #star wars #master and apprentice #obi wan kenobi #qui gon jin #rael averross #count dooku #star wars meta

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honey-minded-hivemind · 1 year ago

Note

Fool, you think I can't handle such dark ideas?

I live for this kinda stuff!

imagine Reader was used as a tracking device to find Genosha without them realizing it- imagine if Reader survived and found out before anyone else and just-

Stared into nothing, their poor robotic brain racing with too many thoughts to properly function

And like- when they're found imagine they just slowly reached up, and without a second thought, began tearing themself apart

They caused so many of their friends to die without realizing it, they're horrible, they're a monster

Those are thoughts that ran through their mind as they tore off their own head

Cube Anon

Oooooo... I see you like where the darkness is taking us...

Reader rips themself apart slowly, unable to cope with the fears and despair and unending unrelenting pain that drenched their core, that smothers each breath, each thought.

Friends of their's were gone.

Gambit was gone.

Leech was gone.

Magneto was gone.

Genosha was gone.

And it was... Reader's fault...

Hearing their friends find our, hearing their anger, their pain, their hate...

Reader couldn't live with it.

They don't go with them to find Trask. They can't. Their friends hate them, and all they want is for Reader to leave tbem alone, to go away, to not come back or cause more damage.

So here Reader is, at the edge of a cold, freezing lake, in the middle of the night, alone, about to plunge in.

They tore open their arms, their legs, exposes the wires in their neck, their stomach, tore their core out and ripped their false hair off and tore at their eyes, breaking them to pieces.

They hated themself.

They couldn't live like this.

They couldn't exist this way, knowing they were the reason everything was bad and their friends were dead and the surviving ones hated them.

So with that final, heartbreaking thought-

They plunge in, screaming as the water burns their system, and their being, into nothingness...

***************************************************

For the X-Men, fighting Bastion amd Sinsiter had been brutal.

It was filled with pain, despair, blood...

What was worse?

Knowing their old friend, Reader, was dead now?

Or knowing that they were innocent, save for the fact Bastion had uses them, created them to be a scapegoat, and would have killed Reader before they'd met the X-Men for being too human for his tastes?

They don't know.

And it burns.

Kurt hadn't turned his back on them. He kept checking the one gift, the one piece, he had left of them, a small wire butterfly, beaded and bright and colorful, just like him, they'd told him. He hated not knowing if they were gone, forever, or if they were possibly in Heaven... He wasn't sure he wanted to know...

The team had decided to build a new safehaven, somehwere safer and more hidden, a place that only allowed mutants and trusted humans into its paradise... It was an island, one that seemed... almost sentient... at times... But it hosted many wonders, good plant life, beautiful animals, clean water, and it opened itself to them, to their kind... It was easy to shut themselves, their new home, everyone and everything, off from the rest of the world. It seemed the only reasonable, the only sane thing, to do, after all they lost and sacrificed amd had destroyed.

And when they discovered pools that could create bodies...

And found out that they could try to enter the spirit realm to bring back those they'd lost...

It was only a matter of time before they started bringing back those who had died unfairly, to give then healthy bodies and a better life and new hope...

All anyone asked, was that they drink of a special liquid and eat its fruit, for then they would know peace...

And it seems the next two they needed to find, the last two, were Gambit and Reader...

***************************************************

(Meanwhile, in the afterlife, Gambit hasn't left Reader, begging them and pleading with then then tell him why they think their friends hate them and who the h*ll told them they were some robot-! How dare someone say that to them?! They're with him, aren't they? So obviously they ain't evil! He's hugging them, murmuring soft words and letting them cry into his shoulder, all to try and stop their sadness, their self-hatred, their pain... He isn't leaving them, no, not for one minute. They need him... But they need to figure out what's taken everyone else, and see if they can't stay safe... So can they please calm down, just for Gambir, please-?)

#honeycomb thoughts #platonic yandere marvel #yandere platonic marvel #platonic yandere xmen #yandere x-men #platonic yandere marvel x reader #platonic yandere xmen 97 #platonic yandere xmen: the animated series #🌸rose by any other name🥀 au #🦾sentinel reader au

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jellybear455 · 17 days ago

Text

What's Left of Anna - TLOU - Part 6

Warnings: cannon violence, reader has a name, spoilers, etc etc

Part 6 booyahhhh

Interacting really helps me know if my stories are reaching people, so don't be afraid :)

Previous part Next part

“Hit gold yet?” I shout to Joel from inside the abandoned car I’m rummaging through.

He’s attempting to siphon gas from one of the decrepit cars surrounding the gas station. He huffs a response, rising to his feet and moving to his next target. I sort through the glove box.

“How’s your hand?” I raise my voice again.

“S’fine.” He’s not lying. I snuck a glance earlier, and it’s significantly less purple, the wrap seemingly helping.

“Cool.” It’s suspiciously quiet without Ellie, who is currently using the gas station bathroom.

Slamming the stiff door shut behind me, I make my way to the car Joel is currently working on. I peek into the driver’s side to pop the boot, but instead catch a glimpse of something shiny.

“Oh, fuck yeah.” Joel’s eyes follow me suspiciously as I approach. “Backstreet Boys.”

He looks at me for along second. “Excuse me?”

“You’re excused. Millenium is the best album to hit the charts.” I brandish the CD. “Don’t you know it? ‘Larger Than Life’? ‘Spanish Eyes’? ‘I Want It That Way?’ Don’t make me sing, because you know I will.”

“I know who the Backstreet Boys are. I’m not an idiot.”

“If you say so. Now I can show Ellie some real music.”

Joel rises to his feet. “You will not be playing that garbage in my car.”

“You wound me,” I reply, pressing my hand to my heart in mock despair. “Shame it’s not your car.”

“Shame it doesn’t have a CD player.”

I frown, glancing over at the offending Chevy. “Fuck.”

Joel barks out a laugh. At least, I think that’s what it was. This man has two expressions; pissed off and heartbreaking despair. Laugh fits neither of those. He catches himself quickly, and for a second, we just stare at each other.

“What happened to your stomach?”

I blink. “Pardon?”

“You press your hand to your side whenever you get nervous.” Joel replies. He looks surprised at my surprise. “You’re not exactly subtle.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Joel pointedly looks down at my hand. “You’re doing it right now.”

I snatch my hand away from the scar. “No, I’m not.”

“I’m guessing it’s a scar, or an old wound. At least, I hope so. If it’s fresh I don’t want to deal with that.” He squints at me for a second, and the next words that come out of his mouth are fearful. “You been bit?”

“No! No, God no.” Swallowing my discomfort, I let my eyes drift away from him.

“Then what is it?”

“I’ll tell you what happened when you tell me who shot you.”

“Touche.” It’s quiet again, and suddenly I feel guilty.

“I got stabbed.”

“By who?”

“What. Bit of glass. Car accident.”

“Oh.”

I look back at him and realise he’s staring straight into my soul. He’s way too close, but yet somehow, so far away. My face burns and I yearn for something to break the awkwardness.

“So, do we have to do this every hour?” Ellie shouts from a few meters away. Relief floods me and I look over my shoulder at her. Joel drops back into a crouch.

“Gas breaks down over time. This stuff's almost water.” Joel replies, refocusing on the car. “Back in the day, we'd drive ten, twelve hours on one tank. You could go anywhere.”

“So, where’d you go?”

I open my mouth to reply but my voice, for some reason, is failing me.

“Pretty much nowhere.” Joel replies, before lowering his mouth to the siphon and blowing.

Ellie, ever the adventurer, marvels. “Nice, how does that work?”

“It’s a siphon.” Joel looks for an answer, but I grin when I realise, he doesn’t have one. “It's when liquid... travels against gravity, because pressure...”

“When you blow on the hose, it makes a temporary vacuum in the tank,” I jump in. “But it’s filled up with the gas that has to go somewhere, so it comes out the other tube because of the difference in pressure.”

Ellie makes a face. “Nerd.”

“You asked.”

She rolls her eyes, before her attention is captured by something else, and she begins to move towards it.

“No wandering.” Joel commands.

“Okay…” Ellie says, swinging off her pack and pulling out a small book. “But what happens next is your fault.”

Joel and I exchange a look of confusion.

"It doesn't matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery." Ellie recites, giggling like a schoolgirl. She reveals the cover of the book with glee. "No Pun Intended: Volume Too by Will Livingston. Volume Too. Look. You get it? ‘Too’? Like, T-o-o.”

“Jesus.” Joel groans.

“God, no.” I clamp my hands over my ears.

"What did the mermaid wear to her math class?...An algae bra." Ellie cackles. “Like, algae bra. I stayed up all night..."

“No.” "…Wondering where the sun went... and then it dawned on me."

“Feel free to wait in the truck.” Joel says, standing up and leaning against the car beside me.

Ellie sighs, reluctantly putting away the book. “Ugh, okay, but just know, you can't escape Will Livingston. He'll be back. There's nothing you can do to stop him.”

“How ‘bout I set Will Livingston on fire. Think that’ll stop him?” I peel my hands from my ears.

“You wouldn’t.”

“I would.”

Despite the banishing of Will Livingston, Ellie’s mouth continues to run. As the Chevy takes off from the gas station, Ellie discovers a whole new world of questions.

“How come all the cars are pushed to the side like that?”

I glance out the window. “The military came through with trucks to free up the road.”

“Must’ve been some truck.”

“Yeah, they used to stick big ass plows on them and clear the roads for their tanks and such.” Joel replies.

Ellie lights up. “I want to see a tank.”

“You will.”

“For better or for worse.” I mutter under my breath.

“Tanks, choppers, all that stuff.” Joel continues. “But they'll fight the wrong enemy. Just scattered around now.”

Ellie has already been distracted. I can feel her rummaging in the pocket behind my seat. “Quit that.”

“I got something. This make you all nostalgic?” Ellie reveals a faded Hank Williams tape.

“This is actually before my time.” Joel replies.

“Speak for yourself, this is gold!” I eject Linda Ronstadt and replace her with Hank Williams.

“Better than Backstreet Boys,” replies Joel, cranking the volume.

“Hey, watch your mouth.”

“Shut up, idiots.” Ellie interrupts.

‘We met in the springtime when blossoms unfold, The pastures were green, and the meadows were gold.’

Closing my eyes, I whisper the words under my breath. With the warm sun on my face, I pretend I’m somewhere safe, and I ignore when Ellie triumphantly reveals her next treasure.

‘Our love was in flower as summer grew on, Her love like the leaves now have withered and gone.’

I jump when Joel attempts to snatch a magazine from Ellie’s hands.

“Why are all the pages stuck together?”

Finally glancing over my shoulder, maternal panic sends me into a flurry. I snatch the magazine out of her hands and fling it out the window. Ellie dissolves into laughter.

“I was just fucking with you!” She winds down her own window and shouts, “Bye-bye, dude!”

I shake my head turn up the volume.

‘Alone and forsaken by fate and by man, Oh Lord, if you hear me, please hold to my hand, Oh, please understand.’

This time I sing along comfortably, staring out the window at the countryside and the cows. Ellie goes silent for once.

None of us have said a word for hours, and Joel refuses to let me drive. Ellie’s sitting in the front seat, staring out the window. I’m lying along the back seat, eyes closed, trying to sleep a little. I don’t know where Joel plans for us to stop tonight, and I want to be prepared for the possibility of a sleepless night. That is, if Joel plans to stop at all.

“She asleep?” Joel asks suddenly.

Ellie looks back at me, and I keep my eyes closed. “Think so.”

“Hm. Surprised she stuck with us so far.” I try not to flinch at Joel’s comment.

“I’m not. Bel’s been there my whole life, and I’ve been told I’m a handful. I don’t think she’d chicken out now.”

“No kidding.” Joel considers this. “She said that she gave up being a spy to keep an eye on you. That true?”

“Yeah. Apparently FEDRA didn’t know she was a doctor. She fessed up when I was born. Said she was a… child nurse? That sounds weird.”

“Paediatrician?”

“Something like that. They put her with the FEDRA kids. She taught us how to read and count and cook and all that good stuff. Bel pretty much raised a whole generation of sad orphan kids.”

“So you’re important to her?” Where is he going with this?

“I guess so.”

“And you’ve never questioned it?”

Ellie is quiet for a second as she thinks, and I hold my breath. When she finally speaks, it’s in a small voice. “I know she knew my mother.”

“You never asked how?”

“I thought you said no backstory stuff.”

Joel doesn’t say anything else for a long time. “All right. That’s enough for today.”

He pulls off the road into a field, and I am forced to give up my façade as the bumpy dirt threatens to send me flying. “Where are we going?”

“Somewhere safe,” Joel replies, glancing at me through the rearview mirror.

“That’s cryptic.” I mutter back, but I don’t object because for some reason, I trust his judgement, despite his strange questioning of my motives.

I push myself upright and pull on my seatbelt. The Chevy is headed for the forest, where under the shelter of the trees we will be safe. Probably. Joel eventually decides we’re far enough from the road and turns off the engine.

Leaping out from the back seat, I call, “Bathroom.”

Leaving the Chevy and my companions behind, I venture off into the shrub. Under the guise of needing to pee, I keep walking until Ellie’s voice sounds like a hum in the distance. Joel trusted me enough to fall asleep in the car today, so I trust him enough to take a moment to myself. A particularly thick oak tree calls my name, and I flop down in front of it.

The light streams through the leaves in sloping columns, the sun slowly slipping towards setting. Dust and pollen swirl though the beams, making patterns in the air and tempting hay fever. The trees stand tall and proud, protecting the forest’s innocent inhabitants, and, by proxy, me.

It’s quiet, which doesn’t always mean it’s safe. But for now, all I want to do is breathe. And think.

Joel claims his brother is in Wyoming. He claims he is… was a firefly. I know this is at least partly true; when we first pointed guns at each other, Marlene mentioned Tommy. But there is absolutely no reason why Tommy would know where the doctors researching the cure are. Which means at some point, Ellie and I might have to venture off on our own.

The thought twists my stomach. Leaving Joel and his protection was a risk I’m not so sure I want to take. It might end with me, or Ellie, or both of us for that matter, dead in a ditch. Anna would expect me to keep her daughter safe, and I have, but travelling without Joel could see me break that oath. Ellie’s blood could save us, but was it worth dying to get her there?

Slowly, as not to disturb the stillness of the forest, I slip my hand into my pocket and retrieve the silver wedding band. Anna had no belongings for me to keep, so a ring that reminds me of her is the closest thing I have. Before she traded away her own engagement ring, I remember she used to whisper to John through it.

“Anna?” I whisper. “This feels dumb, but you used to say talking made you feel... closer to John. So here goes. I wish you were here. I’m really trying to keep Ellie safe, but to be honest the further we get from the QZ the harder it gets. She’s just so… fiercely independent and totally hard-headed, which makes sense because she is your daughter. I just hope… I hope I’m doing this right, making the right choices. It’s hard without you.”

I raise my head from where it was leaning against the trunk of the tree. I have no idea how much time has passed, but the thump of my heart is a little steadier and my thoughts a little clearer. The sun is heavy in the sky. Soon it will set, and the forest would be unsettlingly dark. I pick myself up, heading back in the direction I came until I hear Ellie and Joel quietly conversing.

“I know, the infected will see the smoke.” Ellie says sarcastically.

“No, fungus ain’t that smart. Besides, it’s too remote for infected out here anyway.”

Ellie looks at him incredulously. “People? Well what are they gonna do, rob us?”

I step out of the trees, finally catching their attention. “I think what they’ll have in mind is a little more… permanent than that.”

“You came back.” Joel mutters. Both he and Ellie are watching me cautiously.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“Why would you?”

With a frown, I match Joel’s stare. “What is your problem, old man?”

“Try’na figure out what’s in it for you, old lady.”

“Okay…” Ellie interrupts, pushing a tin bowl towards me. I sit, taking up the bowl of… ravioli, I think. It’s good.

No one says another word as we quietly eat, then roll out our sleeping bags. I strategically place myself between Joel and Ellie. I’m too tired to be trusting now.

“This smells… kinda good,” Ellie comments, pressing her nose to her sleeping bag.

“Must be Frank’s, then.” Says Joel bitterly.

I give mine a quick sniff. Smells like dust. Must be the spare. I zip myself up into it, folding my jacket behind my head and laying my pistol within arm’s reach. Ellie looks at it longingly, and I raise my eyebrows at her in return.

Switching off the lamp, I give my back to Joel, but quickly change my mind as Ellie pulls out her torch and a familiar looking book.

“Joel…” She whispers. He ignores her. Or he’s already asleep. “Joel!”

“What?” Not asleep, then.

“Can I ask you a serious question?”

I attempt to shut my eyes and block Ellie out.

Joel sighs. “Yeah.”

“Why did the scarecrow get an award?”

It’s silent for a second as Ellie waits for Joel to bite.

Finally, Joel replies. “Because he was outstanding in his field.”

“You dick!” Cries Ellie. “Did you read this?”

“No.”

“Everyone’s heard that one Ellie.” I mumble. “Go to sleep.”

For a second I think she’s finally learned to follow instructions. I close my eyes, and sleep is within reach.

“Joel? Those people you said… there’s no way anyone knows we’re here, right?”

“No one’s gonna find us.” Joel replies faintly, clearly drifting off.

“No one’s gonna find us.” Ellie repeats, then goes silent.

Thoughts of a restful night are pulled out from under me like a rug. Suddenly, the trees that felt so safe before are leering and haunting. Shapes move behind my lids every time I try to close my eyes. Each rustle is like a gunshot.

My body goes into lockdown when a twig snaps a few meters from my head. My eyes snap open, and through the dim moon light I spot a familiar figure standing to attention, rifle at the ready.

I wriggle out of my bag as quietly as I can, tiptoeing over to Joel. He watches me over his shoulder.

“I thought you told Ellie we were safe here.” I whisper.

“Not safe anywhere anymore.”

“True, but you can’t keep her safe if you’re dead on your feet.” I say, and he looks away into the trees. “At least try to sleep.”

“You go, I’ll be fine,” He insists.

Gently, I reach out and take the gun from his hands. “Joel, you drove all day. You’re old enough to know that you need to sleep.”

He finally looks back at me, and we stand together in the dark for a second. My eyes strain to make out his features. Cautiously, I take his hand and tug him towards our sleeping bags.

“Please?”

“Fine.” He relinquishes, taking back the rifle and laying it down on the ground.

I don’t relax until his breathing evens out and his body softens with sleep.

Both Joel and Ellie are sleeping soundly on either side of me, but my eyes remain wide open against my will. I toss and turn for what feels like hours, the cold creeping into my bones. I scootch closer to Ellie, hoping to steal some of her body heat. She is absolutely roasting, borderline feverish, and normally I would be concerned, but right now it’s all I need to fall asleep. Tucking my head into her shoulder, I drift off.

#fanfiction #x reader #fanfic #tlou #tlou x reader #ellie williams x reader #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel x reader #reader insert #hbo tlou #the last of us #joel and ellie #the last of us hbo #tlou season one

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captainoxymore · 11 months ago

Text

JORGE CANT HURT US MORE ISNT ? [WISDOM SAGA EDITION | SPOILERS]

at the end of the thunder saga I was crying my eyes out. But hey, I said to myself, as an unquestioning optimist. Now that all the crew are dead, no one's going to die, so no more emotional damage, it's DONE, and he can't do the pancake thing again, Jay! Ahhhh. I was optimistic and naive. I'd forgotten that Mr Jay was as crazy as I was. Or worse. So here we go, rewinding the traumas!

Legendary :

legendary spared us quite a bit at the beginning, at least all the sweet stuff with Telemachus playing Disney princesses. Only argos got me, but then argos is ‘only’ in the animatics. well, I'm going to count the animatics because I was at the livestream.

And then antinous. It's not so much the trauma as the distress of telemachus that was touching. And I jumped up when I heard antinous' words. I was expecting threats, vulgarity, in short, for him to be hurtful, but I wasn't expecting that.

little wolf

Little Wolf was also quite calm. What I mean by that is that the trio of songs shared by Athena and Telemachus can be touching, that Antinous is worrying, the songs aren't bathed in the same dark, worrying and pessimistic atmosphere as those in Thunder Saga. Athena brings light and hope to Telemachus and you think ‘that's it, a goddess against all this rubbish, it'll be over in no time’. Even if telemachus takes a beating against antinous, he's got an impressive level up and with just a little more help from athena he'll be able to beat everyone.

We'il be fine

when we'il be fine, i screamed, because ATHENA CHARACTER ARC. Because she calls odysseus her friend, she calls telemachus good kid, because you feel the chemistry between the two and it's incredible. you feel all the hope in this song, and telemachus is definitely the reincarnation of polites. And the reference to your light is sublime.

Love in paradise

the little recap at the beginning of love in paradise is nice, especially in animatic, I was riveted. I have to admit that for Love in Paradise I was really waiting for a slightly comic song where Calypso acts like a 2 year old fangirl. I totally underestimated Jay. Already. 1. the music grabbed me right in the heart. And…. sorry but the depressive part of the song? ‘ody, get away from the lenge’. I thought polites couldn't fool me any more. LOST. JUST LET ME CLOSE MY EYES, MY OPENS ARMS. odysseus's howl at the end broke my heart. You could really feel his despair. I couldn't even see ‘im a monster now’ (not the raw raw raw version the edgy version), I just saw a depressed, borderline suicidal guy. heartbreaking.

God games

god games. i was expecting a punchy, catchy, song. A great song. But i was not expecting the end. (i do a little post about, and 2 other about athena)

in other words, ZEUS STAGGERING HIS OWN DAUGHTER, HIS FAVORITE DAUGHTER. AND HER, WALKING IN THE LIGHTNING, MOTIVED BY A VISION OF THE FAMILY SHE IS FIGHTING FOR, FALLING ON THE FLOOR IN HER OWN BLOOD AND BEGGING HIS FATHER (WHO TRIED TO KILL HER) TO LET GO HIS FRIEND AND PASSED OUT OR DYING WE DONT KNOW.

do i really need to said more ? NO.

but im going to analyse all that more i swear...

Jorge, im watching you. If athena dies, im going to do something bad.

#epic musical #epic the musical #odysseus epic #calypso epic #epic zeus #epic the wisdom saga #epic athena #epic telemachus #epic antinous #god games #love in paradise #we'il be fine #legendary #little wolf #analysis

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bluegekk0 · 11 months ago

Note

would the adults in the family smoke/drink/take drugs? if not now, what about when their trauma was really bad?

Putting it under a read more because it's long, and because of the subjects mentioned which some may not feel like reading. Warnings for use of alcohol, drugs and sexual topics (I'm adding that last one because it is very relevant to this topic for Grimm specifically)

Grimm and Vyrm drink together from time to time, and sometimes Hornet joins them as well, though she doesn't like the taste of most drinks. Holly and Zote don't drink, as do the kids, naturally (though I imagine there are some non-alcoholic drinks they could sip on). Alcohols like mead and wine are especially popular during town celebrations, and there is also a tavern in the town that Grimm occasionally visits with Vyrm or the Troupe whenever they celebrate a successful performance. I don't think anyone smokes, and when it comes to drugs, there is the substance found in the beasts named Squit, which has some drug-like effects. Vyrm is occasionally under its influence if he ends up hunting for them in Greenpath, and while it can help him relax, it often has an opposite effect and for that reason he rarely consumes it outside of those hunts. Aside from that, I wouldn't say anyone else does any kind of drugs.

---

Now, in the past, things were a lot different for both Grimm and Vyrm. I'll start with Grimm, since he's the one who really experimented with this stuff. I don't think he ever smoked, but he attended many social events and parties where alcohol and other substances were plenty, and he definitely didn't spare himself any of it. He would get drunk and sometimes start fights in taverns for fun, and even during more sophisticated events he liked to drink and mess with everyone if he felt bored. During many of these events he also hooked up with strangers, so very often you'd see him leave the main event and disappear with whomever he wanted to have some fun with. He was definitely a party animal, so it's no surprise that he would drink a lot and do other things.

Things took a different turn after he met Vyrm. He didn't stop attending events and enjoying himself, but he tried to visit Vyrm as often as he could, and as his feelings for him grew stronger and stronger, he found himself thinking more about that than some of his more wild activities. Because of his new focus, he would also drink less. Getting to know Vyrm had an effect on his chaotic life, undoubtedly, he was already slowly in the process of settling down and leaving that life behind, even if he had no guarantee that he'd end up in a relationship with him.

Unfortunately, after Vyrm disappeared, Grimm didn't take it too well. He didn't attend as many parties as he had no energy for them, but he still drank a lot, more than ever, in hopes it would numb the pain of his heartbreak and all of his guilt. It was a period where he indulged in anything that would make him temporarily forget, which for him was primarily alcohol and sexual encounters. Divine and Brumm's intervention helped him from falling completely into the pit of despair, but he still drank a lot whenever he was by himself.

After Vyrm came back, Grimm was able to overcome that habit, certainly made it easier by the fact that he was replacing his physical body periodically (which meant that the effects of his drinking thankfully weren't nearly as destructive as they would be otherwise). Instead of reaching for wine whenever he felt down, he had a partner to find comfort in. He still struggled with the sexual part of his old habits, he would seek that frequently, often just to make himself feel better, which back then made him worry that he only saw Vyrm as another sexual partner. Which, of course, wasn't the case, he truly loved him, it wasn't just sexual attraction. These days, he doesn't deal with those fears nearly as often, he's a lot more confident in his feelings for Vyrm, and their private encounters are rooted in their genuine passion for one another instead of being framed as a form of escape. As for drinking, he was able to stop doing so to cope, and instead only drinks occasionally as a form of celebration, to mentally set the acceptable boundary and not fall back into his habits.

---

When it comes to Vyrm, he didn't outright have a problem with alcohol, smoking, or anything else that could be seen as addictive (like sex in Grimm's case). Well, almost anything, though he wasn't aware of it for most of his life. It was soul, the magical substance found at the center of his powers. He consumed it in liquid form in place of eating actual food, and he would rely on it all the time to heal any ailment he had through focusing it. At the beginning of his rule, things were perfectly fine, but as time went on, the lack of proper nutrients and calories had a bad effect on his body. Instead of eating, he would constantly rely on soul to keep him going, which inevitably put him in a spot where he was basically addicted to it. Any attempts at eating food were unsuccessful for as long as there was a source of soul nearby, as he was too terrified of embracing his instincts, especially after the Xero incident.

The reliance on the substance was slowly killing him, and only when it was stripped from him and when the hibernation messed with his knowledge of soul magic, was he able to leave it behind. It wasn't smooth at all, granted. Right after waking up from hibernation, he experienced what can easily be compared to withdrawals. Nausea and vomiting (inevitably also connected to the fact that his stomach had to adjust to proper food intake), insomnia, heightened anxiety, tremors, he had an absolutely terrible time for the first few weeks of not relying on soul. All of the symptoms were made even worse by his guilt, as well as the wound on his head that slowly became infected, which would cause him all kinds of pain and side effects.

Eventually he reunited with Hornet, Holly and Grimm, and while he had the opportunity to heal, he did struggle with the symptoms for a while. He would still experience tremors and anxiety, nausea became less frequent but it still sometimes bothered him. Luckily for him, soul wasn't a commonly found substance outside of the White Palace (in the AU, it works a bit differently; only a soul-based higher being can extract it from living beings, which disqualified Vyrm, and I see the soul totems found all over the in-game world as a gameplay only thing; meanwhile, the hot springs are filled with water without any soul in it), so he had very little chance of getting back into the harmful habit. Besides, he could not use any of the spells anymore, the hibernation erased his memories related to them, so he would have to re-learn it all to utilize soul.

The first year or two after his return were a healing period for him. As he found comfort in his new partner, and focused on eating to gain weight and heal the damage his body suffered throughout the years of relying on soul, his withdrawal symptoms softened. These days, it's all behind him, and while he does sometimes worry that he might relapse if he ever comes into contact with soul, his acceptance of his instincts and the gained love for food guarantee that whatever would happen, it wouldn't be nearly as bad as it was back in the day. Soul nearly destroyed him because he was scared of eating, which isn't the case anymore. That said, he still avoids it, as he's comfortable not using any magic and being an equal to those around him.

#ask stuff #feral pk au #save #grimm #fpk #vyrm

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brainfilehasstoppedworking · 2 years ago

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So, thought of some sad Taka and Takaaki stuff.

And it's Mastermind AU stuff. If Takaaki was a Mastermind in THH.

After Mondo's execution, Taka completely shuts down. No sleep, won't eat, won't speak and nobody is really there to help him out. Makoto is trying, but it doesn't work. And everyone else just either acknowledges him or doesn't bat an eye.

Takaaki really didn't want it to happen. Taka...he was happy. He made friends with Mondo, and as much as he didn't like Mondo given his record, he felt glad that Taka met him. Even if he wanted Taka to make friends with someone a bit better. Someone who didn't challenge him to a sauna battle where both of them could've died. And in the most idiotic way, too. But...Taka was happy. And the two really loved each other.

He wasn't an idiot. He knew how to two looked at each other. They really loved one another. Then...

Then Mondo killed Chihiro.

He knew what would happen. He couldn't be biased. He couldn't keep Mondo alive and figure something else to replace him. No. Mondo needed to be executed. He took a life. And now, his life must be taken from him. It's how it worked. He knew the justice system as well as anyone else, it was his job! His career was justice.

And...justice wasn't the best thing in the world when it came to something like this. He remembered just how awful he felt when he had Mondo board the bike. When he had Mondo chained down. It was funny, he felt joy of seeing the despair in others' eyes. When he killed the others previously, it felt nice...

And he practically felt nothing else, not even any remorse. But Mondo made him feel the most remorse. But not for Mondo himself, but for Taka. He just wished Mondo wasn't the boy he knew for years since the formation of The Crazy Diamonds. Which, he wasn't, but...

He was still the same. That awful temper and blind rage that got him in trouble a lot.

And seeing Taka during the aftermath made him feel worse about everything, too.

He hoped Taka would at least eat or something. Then again...you really wouldn't eat if you thought your best friend could be in the meal you were given. Right? He also wished Taka would just at least sleep. Prayed for at least a little nap. But Taka refused.

When Taka became Kiyondo Ishida, he was worried. But, at least he was feeling better. And he'd finally do things like sleeping! That was something! And when Taka would go to sleep, he'd sneak into his room and just watch him for a bit. Make sure he's okay.

He'd see the tear streaks on his son's cheeks as his son held Mondo's jacket close to him. Curling up into a little ball as he slept. It was heartbreaking. He wished it didn't happen that way. He'd embrace Taka ever so carefully. He'd apologize quietly, apologizing to the pain he's caused his son to go through. And that he was sorry for being an awful father and that he loved him.

It was really what he could do. It was the only thing. He could only hope that Taka would be safe. Safe from harm.

And how wrong he was.

#It's every where LMAO #This kinda written like a fic I didn't mean that dndben #oopsies...ehehehe...#danganronpa #sam's talky talks #takaaki ishimaru #mastermind takaaki ishimaru #kiyotaka ishimaru #mondo owada #ishimondo #<- I mean it's mentioned for a little bit #Uhm...yeah #mm! takaaki au #If Takaaki was Mastermind during THH #I've been having R U Mine by Arctic Monkeys on loop someone HELP ME

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luvo27 · 28 days ago

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17!!! 21!!! 22!!!

17!!! Do you regularly discuss fics, or do you keep most of the info to yourself before you start posting?

ohhh this is such a good question actually!!! I tend to discuss my fantasy high fics a lot more than my dc ones, and i can be a snippet sharing fiend in discord servers im in!! i do always feel like I tip basically my entire hand about my wips when i say anything ever, but i probably share a lot less info than i think i do until i post!!

21!! what is something that no one has caught about one of your fics?

this one was tricky because i definitely like to chat about stuff when i reply to comments, and some quieter folks definitely might have caught some stuff that i dont think anyone has, and theres definitely a lot of stuff that HAS gotten caught!! i think i tend to be pretty intentionally obvious about things i want people to catch, but definitely some highlights are someone noting the carefully insidious text messages from Baron from the Baronies in The Stress of Being Seventeen vs. the Immutable Law of Love, and one that you caught actually, which is the layers to Tim offering to teach Cass how to drive in you do not have to be good!!

but i'm pretty sure no one has caught onto this!! in chapter 3 of you do not have to be good, there's this paragraph:

Cass can remember a time when she did not know what death was. Cass now knows, better than most, what death is. What a terrible, awful, horrendous absence it creates. What regret is now carried from that irreversible mistake.

i think in part not caught because not everyone who read the first fic read this one, and not everyone who read you do not have to be good read tell me about despair, but this is a direct call back to the opening of tell me about despair:

To Cass, death is: 1. A mistake. She didn’t know what she was doing. How could she? She understood so little, back then, she didn’t know— 2. A regret. She wishes she could take it back. She’d do anything to take it back, but unfortunately, what she did is 3. Irreversible. She can’t take it back. She can’t put that man back together, she can’t bring people back to life. She can do nothing but relive the memory of watching the fear, the panic, the drain of life and willpower and emotion, again and again and again, wishing that she’d known then what she knows now, that death is 4. Terrible. Awful. Horrendous. Any number of words, along those lines, really. It’s terrible, to see nothing where there was something once. Cass has heard people say that bodies look peaceful, when they’re dead, as if the person they were before is resting, sleeping. Cass doesn’t understand how they could come to that conclusion. Even in sleep, the body betrays thoughts, emotions, expressions, hopes and fears and dreams. In death, the body is just a collection of blood and bone and viscera. There is no rest to be had there.

22!!! what is one of your favorite tropes to write?

crack. the answer to this is always going to be crack. i dont actually write straight crack all that often but its literally my favorite thing to do ever!!! i always write more faster and i always have such a great time!! for me, it kind of alleviates any of my usual fic writer neuroses: i'm not trying to write something particularly good or an in depth character study or with a coherent plot, my main goal is to make myself laugh and if i do that, then i win!!

that being said, the line between hilarity and heartbreak is probably my favorite thing to play with in writing!! its why stephanie brown is one of my favorite characters to write, because i feel like she lends herself to it well!! its why yj 98 is one of my favorite comics!! it's why i love writing for fantasy high so much because sometimes that's exactly what the show is!! i take a lot of my storytelling philosophy from the philosophies of the cast for d20!! there's something that i think brennan lee mulligan said, about how comedy lowers your guard to allow other emotions to hit harder and more viscerally, and in the wrapup for exu calamity, the cast talked a lot about the profundity of hilarity and the hilarity of profundity. the tag crack taken seriously is probably my favorite thing on ao3!! i both want to get more cracky and also more serious, and i want those things to feed into each other!!! there's a quote that gets repeated in cathrynn m. valente's novel Space Opera: life is beautiful, and life is stupid, and i think that sums up a lot of my feelings on how i approach crack :DDD

#hehehehehe thank you friend i loveeee yapping!!!

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goshdangronpa · 10 months ago

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oh PLEASE hit with that 7-10

Hey, Peach! Is this for the ask game? Dang, that was fast

7.) Favorite Class Trial From All The Games? The last trial in SDR2. The overwhelming barrage of plot twists (holy shit it's Makoto! ... holy shit it's NOT), the roller coaster of emotions, the violently jarring shifts in setting and tone (everyone's back! ... EVERYONE'S IZURU). Plus, I finally understood the point of, and finally came to like, Hajime Hinata.

V3's fourth trial came very close for its masterful subversions of the Danganronpa formula, and especially the incredible use of gameplay to forward the narrative. That moment where you have to COUNTER Kaito and AGREE with Kokichi is a heartbreaker.

8.) Least Favorite Class Trial From All The Games? THH's third one is unique in being almost anti-hype. Every other trial at least has a disturbing set-up, preposterous reveals, a string of moments where everything falls into place, and characters revealing their true selves. This one has ... little hammers and a cardboard box robot? And the hammers were used in a different order than you'd expect? And a fairly obvious culprit, motivated by fairly uninteresting reasons to cook up a fairly bland murder plot? Even when the other trials sucked in certain ways, they had some real imagination and zest and emotional heft to them. Not the case here.

9.) Favorite Execution? Like I could name anything other than Kirumi's execution. Hoooly shit. Its basis in mythology makes for truly striking imagery, like a Saw trap wrought by a vengeful god. And though we've only just come to know Kirumi's nature, it's such a perfect match for that character. The emotional power of the body-rending climb, the dashed hope, and the plummet to hell is how I define Despair. Just gotta quote Linkin Park here, with zero irony: she tried so hard and got so far, and in the end, it didn't even matter.

Korekiyo's came close for being, by a landslide, the funniest in the whole series. My understanding from his monologue in the third trial is that he abused and killed his sister, so her spirit teaming with Monokuma to extinguish his soul made me bust a fucking gut.

10.) Least Favorite Execution? I'd say Mikan, but I've played with the idea enough in an as-yet unreleased fanfic project that I can't say it doesn't do something for me. Gonta's execution? I got nothing. Why the high noon setting? Why impalement by a dang Beedrill? Why ... why all that stuff with the Monokubs ...

#hajime hinata #kirumi tojo #gonta gokuhara #thanks for asking!!

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definitely-rubbish · 2 months ago

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Hey! First off, just wanted to say how great your writing is. I know a couple of people have already mentioned it, but I don’t think it ever hurts to thank the people whose work you enjoy. It’s honestly a joy every time I read something of yours.

Also, I wanted to ask if you’ve got any album recommendations. I’m really into music and how it can properly make you feel things. I’d love to find more records that take you on a journey from start to finish, and you really seem to know your stuff when it comes to music, so I thought I’d ask.

Thanks again for everything you do. Sending a big hug from Spain!

this is one of my favourite asks ever, thank you thank you for not only being so lovely about my writing, but giving my the oppurtunity to talk about music!!! I really value your words. there's never enough times people can tell me what my fics mean to them, it really keeps me going. i'm in awe and total gratitude every occassion, so i'm very happy you enjoy my work this much and i value it very much! I will go total album ramble mode under the cut :]

I'm going to list 8 here, but i've got a few more if you would like them, just let me know or reach out! but in no particular order, here's some albums and the journeys i think they take you on.

This Is My Truth Tell Me Yours by the Manic Street Preachers - very much the journey of truth, grief, and longing flowing under typical manics political messaging and cultural signposts. cannot be removed from the context of Richey's disappearance, which both adds and is integral to the fabric of this album. You are in dialogue with both your inner self and nicky wire's lyrics, as well as the pain the entire band were dealing with. we are all guided by these emotions and this album guides us not to acquitting them, but acknowledging that they are foundational to our humanity. that's my truth, anyway. technically a britpop album but i believe it furthers that in all the right places.

And The Hits Just Keep On Coming by Michael Nesmith - i wax poetic about michael nesmith whenever i possibly can, and probably when i shouldn't. he is one of my favourite lyricists and his impact on current music cannot go unstated. This album was a response to both pressure to conform by music execs, as well as an affair he had that led to a child with a woman who was not his wife, and a divorce. and yet. YET. this is one of the most dignified albums i have ever heard. he respectfully extends a grace, and humility to his wife, admits that he has done wrong, and keeps going. despite how able he is to admit the depths of his despair, there is such hope in the soul of ever song that you don't realise how heartbreaking it all is until you've finished the album and already promised to be a better person in the future. More stripped back that his previous stuff, or his work with the monkees, yet defiantly His sound. The Upside of Goodbye and Roll With The Flow are two of my favourite songs of all times. one of my favourite albums ever. excellence in the face of the loss of integrity. only he could do it. a journey thru nez's psyche, and hope in hard times.

The Final Cut by Pink Floyd - i tried not to stray into Concept albums when doing these, but i'll make an exception here, because this is my favourite pink floyd album. i remember first listening to it and leaving the living room to lay down in my bed and soak it all up. inspired by the start of the falklands war, roger waters highlights the deceit of the british government with the brutal honesty it deserves about war, violence, and the ongoing threat of nuclear terror. never does he shy away, and though the recording of this album was a tumultuous time for the band, i believe it adds to what this album is worth. especially prevalent today.

Queen II by Queen - not exactly a concept album but not not a concept album, but it's a queen album and they're my special interest so in this goes. Basically two journeys in one; instead of the regular A-side/B-side we see with vinyls, Queen bring forth The White Side, predominantly brian may tracks with one roger taylor tune that deal with the exponential Reality of human emotions through grandiose imagery, and The Black Side, all freddie mercury tracks that deal with terrestrial fantasy through a uniquely human lens, and the life that can be held within fairytales (+ complexities therein). There is a medley of 3 songs on each side, and the White Queen medley is one of the most beautiful succession of songs to ever grace music. i truly believe. It's Queen's second album and yet they are already proving themselves as giants of their craft - thru a mainly prog rock sound (but delving further, naturally) - of which no one can truly define but many are amazed at. compelled further into.

Silent Passage by Bob Carpenter - though sonically brilliant and lyrically phenomenal, i would suggest a more ambiguous definition of Journey when thinking of this one. I knew when i first listened to this album that it would be incredibly important to me, because i couldn't fathom how this gem could go overlooked for all these years. That there are such few people privy to this album. My heart breaks for the artist, and for the album, and the songs. it is a journey of acceptance that music will find you if it means something, and can leave an impact. It is folk-esque, and to me feels like a pilgrimage to nowhere. the opening track Miracle Man sets the tone fantastically, but i think the soul of the album is in First Light, which i use as inspiration in most things i do. i hold this album in incredibly high esteem.

Gigi's Recovery by The Murder Capital - dark and foreboding, this is one of my favourite albums of the 2020s so far. TMC have a similar sound to Fontaines DC but, imo, surpass them. the album a journey of Gigi's Recovery, yes, though who that is, and what that represents, and the consequences of that throughout the rest of the album is entirely up to interpretation. It's an intense listen without being scary. every song is warratned in its sound and what it provokes from you. it is also incredibly vulnerable in a way i treasure. Ethel and The Stars Will Leave Their Stage are particular highlights.

Chill Out by KLF - an ambient soundscape album from electronic band klf. it's literally supposed to be like a journey through america, and you feel it. i'm a lyrical person but i do not feel as if I'm missing anything by the absence of any here. very vibey and worth the experience. would recommend listening on youtube where you can listen to the original version rather than the reissue which misses some stuff out. noel gallagher brought it on his first roadie tour of america with the inspirals and apparently it was the Sound of the Tour! so nicely ordained.

So Long I Screamed by Holy Ghost Tent Revival - if Chill Out is a train ride thru middle america then So Long I Screamed is a steamboat ride through the south of the country. totally bluegrass and raucuous. I adore it. populated with laughs and applause and a personality that really puts you into the fun with the band. nice surprises dotted around that juxtapose the upbeat sound at times, and adds to the rich texture the album gives of summer, sun, and serenity with the unknown, i find. we don't know where we're going but look at us doing it anyway.

let me know if you listen to any of these and what your thoughts are! i hope this was helpful in some way and again, thank you for asking! i love to talk about music and give recommendations so this is really a dream. Have a lovely day and my sincerest gratitude for your kindness!!!

#i love music #and i love talking about it . evidently #also just eternally loving of everyone who reads my fis and takes the time to say so it genuinely makes me feral #asks

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