kissmetilurdrunk-blog

[snek-of-eden]

I just saw a post about the gay bar in Amsterdam's red light zone where Trent and Colin's coming out scene was set, and it was talking about how the bar (prik) has a ginger cat that hangs out at the bar. it's even on their website!! and now my brain is whirling with ideas about a possible fanfic idea about trent and this cat. someone give me a break i'm having coniptions over the oneshot possibilities

[jedusaur]

Roy/Jamie(/Keeley) recs, part 3/3

part 1: tropefic part 2: kink fic

part 3: canon-based fic

Waterfalls (R/J/K, 43k) by @andfrecklesandyoursmile Roy and Jamie start texting after Roy's last game. best slow-burn longfic in the pairing, imo (probably got less attention than it deserves because it's mistagged "pre-relationship"—don't worry it's absolutely not, they do get together!)

How To Build A Triangle (R/J/K, 10k) by @itwoodbeprefect this has so many feet-kickingly delightful little details, my favorite of which is Roy googling polyamory in his office with PornHub pulled up in another tab in case someone comes in and he needs to switch to something less embarrassing

the pull of you (R/J, 8k) by @soofyahn if you watched the Uncle's Day scene and came straight to AO3 to find out what happened next, this is the fic you were looking for

if you could redirect my day (R/J/K, 12k) by @theladyragnell my favorite of the broad field of post-S2 "Roy invites Jamie to Marbella" fics

A Change is as Good as a Rest (R/J/K, 7k) by @siriaeve my favorite of the even broader field of post-S2 "Roy doesn't invite Jamie to Marbella but he shows up anyway" fics (one of my favorite lines about Roy and Jamie ever: he admires you so much he can't even tell where that ends and the wanting begins)

he knows so much about these things (R/J, 1k) by @trinityofone my favorite Amsterdam fic, just Roy and Jamie lying in the grass together lookin at the stars

mad comets, fixed (R/J/K, 9k) by @leenik-geelo heroically pounded out and posted during the tragically short-lived Golden Age of OT3 i.e. the week between 3x11 and the finale. some really lovely prose in this one, very atmospheric

so afraid that time will take it all from me (R/J, 10k) by @teddy-after-all in-depth character study of Roy as a closeted gay man dealing with internalized homophobia—I only like this kind of thing when it's executed really well, which this is

With Only Wings (R/J + R/K, 12k) by @icehot13 the aftermath of the hug at Wembley, exploring Jamie's issues with being seen as soft

it's on the table (R/J/K, 10k) by @armadillo1976 in which the three of them visit Oxford, fall off a punt, and end up in a hotel room

[gottagobackintime]

I liked that we only got to see Trent look at Colin this episode. Having him observe Colin and then deciding what to do feels like a very Trent thing to do. Yes, Colin kissing Michael where anyone could see is bad if he wants to keep it a secret. And that's a conversation that I'm not getting into now. BUT, what does Trent actually know about Colin in terms of being out or not. He knows that Colin isn't out to the public, obviously, because it would have made headlines. But he doesn't know if Colin is out to his teammates and leaders. We know he isn't but Trent doesn't. He saw Colin and Michael kiss and he heard what Colin said in the latest episode. Yes, Colin brought Michael to Sam's restaurant and introduced him as his pal, his wingman. Trent could have heard that, he was sitting close by, but did he? I mean every shot we got of him he was clearly deep into his own conversation with various people at his table. Would he have picked up what Colin said, and remembered it? I don't think so.

So he observes Colin, because now he knows something new but not enough. And I know that a lot of you feel like Trent should warn him, tell him that he saw them kissing. But honestly, Colin is an adult who knows that there are no out players. He knows that it would make headlines, he knows he's not out to the team, and he still chose to kiss his boyfriend in an alley. Sure he could have been drunk or just wanted to kiss his boyfriend, consequences be damned. But he still chose to do it. So Trent has two choices, act like Colin doesn't have a clue what it's like being gay, telling him he needs to be careful because people can see him if he's kissing his boyfriend in public (which would honestly be condescending) or he doesn't say anything, he waits and sees how Colin acts, to see if he should mention anything to him. Trent has clearly chosen the latter option for now and we'll see where this goes.

There's also the "is Trent gay or not" aspect, I say he is. And if we're going with that assumption we also have to think about, is Trent himself out? Or rather, is he out to people at work. Because coming out isn't a singular event, you'll always come out. Every time you meet someone who doesn't know who you are, you'll have to decide if you're going to come out to them or not. I'm leaning towards him, not being in the closet, but rather him keeping his private life to himself and being open with friends and family. He's not hiding it and he's not ashamed, he just doesn't tell anyone, because it's not relevant when he's at work. And I say that as someone who loves reading fanfics where he is an openly gay sports journalist.

Where am I going with this? I don't know, I never know what my point is. BUT, I do think that we'll see similar scenes of Trent just observing Colin until perhaps the Amsterdam episode. And that's where he tells Colin that he knows and/or that he's gay himself. And then we might see Colin confiding in him and Trent might help him with a statement for when he's ready to tell the world. Because I do believe that he will tell the public. I don't know if it will be because he's been outed or he's doing it of his own free will. I don't really mind, I think they'll give us something that will rip our hearts out either way. But I am a believer in "gay mentor" Trent Crimm, giving Colin someone "in the business" to confide in.

[100gayicons]

Excerpts from Herbert Tobias entry on Wikipedia:

Tobias was a German photographer best known for his fashion photography during the 1950s. He also drew critical praise for his portrait studies, his photographs of Russia during World War II and his homoerotic pictures of men.

In 1942 Tobias was drafted into the German Nazi army and was sent to the Eastern Front. Shortly before the end of the war he deserted and was captured by the Americans on the Western Front. He was released at the end of 1945.

In 1948, while staying in Heidelberg he began a relationship with a civilian employee of the American Forces of Occupation. In 1950 both men were denounced under § 175 of the German Criminal Code. They moved to Paris.

In Paris Tobias worked as a retouched for German photographer Willy Maywald who introduced him to the fashion world. In 1953 Tobias' first published photos appeared in Vogue. In the same year, after resisting arrest during a police raid on a gay establishment, he was thrown out of France and returned to Heidelberg.

Soon his fashion photographs began to appear in West German magazines. And November 1953, out of over 18,000 entrants, he won first prize in a highly lucrative competition by Frankfurter Illustrierten Zeitung.

Through publication of his work in many high-class magazines Tobias had become, by 1956, an established figure in West German fashion scene.

During the 1960s, Tobias style fell out of favor in Fashion magazines. But in 1972 he found a new avenue for his photographs - various gay and pornographic magazines.

By 1981, with some high profile exhibitions of his work in Amsterdam and Berlin, Tobias working on a book with a collection of his nudes.

Tobias became seriously ill in February 1982 and died in August of the same year. He was one of the first high-profile victims of AIDS in Germany. He was buried in Altona Cemetery in Hamburg. In 2007 his grave site was declared an Ehrengrab ("grave of honour") by the Hamburg Senate.

[aveys6]

watched 3.06 for the 3rd time today.

it's so beautiful to see the characters you love having so much fun.

it's what you wish to see in every show; what people are like when they dont have to put so much effort in pushing the plot of their life forward.

starting to believe that every little thing,

is gonna be alright :)

heres a roll of my favorite moments

in no particular order of scenes or admiration

* dani trying and failing to keep his tulip request anonymous

* isaac's impassioned speech in the lobby

* feathers in everyone's hair

* the couple retreating in horror at the state of the lobby

* the staff watching the pillow fight so amused :)

* trent being asked for tourist-y input and giving a nerdy answer (that the team still appreciated!)

* rebecca dancing with boat man in that beautiful dress, hair down, barefoot

* the whole confrontation between trent and colin. beautiful beautiful beautiful

* trent's cunty animal print shoes

* colin freaking out over vanilla vodka actually being served LMFAO

* phil dunster's voice acting was incredible! i keep watching his scenes with brett, especially the "windmills are real, man. what are you talking about?" AND "fucking hell roy. do you know how to tie your own laces?"

* jamie sobering up when roy told him to stop being a dick

* "put your feet on the pedals. PUT YOUR FEET ON THE PEDALS"

* roy's breathing exercises

* "i'm gonna fucking kill you"

* "i can't turn the other way"

* roy and jamie apologizing to each other

* rebecca and beard duet

* sam pretending to cough out feathers on the bus

* moe being a nerd

* ted's whole trip scene. nick mohammed dressed as a cowboy. him being served his favorite barbecue sauce. TSA. the triangle animations. all of it incredible

* triangles. tri-angles. TRY angles. TRY ANGELS

* ted's van gogh doodle

* total football already existing

* dud batch

* jamie and roy biking away together

* higgins performing bass

* charlie hiscock's acting is incredible

* will being invited for a threesome

* colin touching trent's arm on the bus

* trent being underdressed finally and smiling!!!

* the shot of keeley's ad for amsterdam quickly changing to the shot of ted's nearly empty shroom tea

* beard's excessive skin care routine

* "don't tell jan. where's ted?"

* trent just appearing behind colin

* colin's speech :(

* keeley seeing the aurora borealis :)

* colin and trent sitting on the gay monument

* "is everything okay at home?"

[fuerst-von-argot]

I don't know if it's of interest to anyone here, but @elenatria, @progressi9 and I were in Lithuania for a week and had some emotional and exciting moments at the HBO Chernobyl locations. 😁

At the palace of culture and sports we interrupted some current filming and discovered Boris' armchair.

In Fabijoniškės we learned from which rooftops the scenes were shot and where CGI Chernobyl was located.

In the KGB prison it was pleasantly chilly with 34 degrees outside.

We saw shooting stars on the Alley of Sigitas Geda.

They're the same picture.

The Bench Scene in Pravieniškės without the bench but right next to a prison, quite secluded and tranquil and without a cab driver for the ride back.

And at the Amsterdam School Museum, Valery's appartment (directly across the street from our hotel) we learned about the Jewish, gay former occupant of the appartment and how important this place was to HBO, as well as how important it was to them to decorate the entire appartment, including the inside of the fridge, in Soviet style. Or how Valery's cat was almost fed dry food. 

And then there is the back door that could be used to visit Valery's appartment hidden from the eyes of the KGB. 😏

I can only summarise it by saying that it was incredibly unique and emotional and I learned to appreciate every place, every scene we visited in a whole new way.

I can still hardly believe everything we learned, especially from our wonderful guide and host in Valery's appartment.

[liesmyth]

Directors commentary for gonna take on the world some day !!!!!! 💙

gonna take on the world some day (Ted Lasso, Jamie/Roy, Post S3, slowburn get together [WIP])

There’s a part of Jamie that’s still thirteen and awestruck, or seventeen and infatuated, or twenty-two and bitter and still fucking obsessed, that still can’t believe he lives in a world where he gets to have stuff like Roy Kent inviting him over for tea. Can’t quite believe this is his life. Jamie’s summer, and beyond.

omgg thank you for giving me the chance to talk about the behind-the-scenes for this fic! I actually started writing it as a companion piece to Once More, With Feeling (fic where Roy and Jamie get together in Amsterdam one year after the Amsterdam episode) and I had vague ideas of writing the Jamie side of it / how they got to the scene of the fic. So I was like "I know where it started, I know where this is going." I had a whole timeline drafted and everything.

However. Then I started writing the fic and the Roy/Jamie dynamic that developed was all wrong to match up with that other fic timeline and vibes. They were SO codependent from the start and the vibe was so cute! And I simply couldn't go along with the timeline that I had written down (where eventually they became more distant and then reconnected in Amsterdam) and now I'm like, fuck it we're freeballin. Which is why I need to sit down at some time and decide where to send this fic so it can stop being a WIP buy also in have so many half written scenes I don't want to lose! I know their mentor/mentee slash gay chicken dynamic will escalate beautifully.

Anyway. The best part about writing this fic so far was making up the whole Australian Summer 22 World Cup that lives in my head. I only got to use 20% of it in the fic but plotting it was a blast and it sparked so much joy ☺️

[fanfic writers director’s cut meme!]

[embrace-and-love]

@gayboymolloy thank you for tagging me! And let me say, your taste??? >>> I've been listening to Chappell Roan lately and her music is sooooo great. I've basically only listened to 3 people since 2021, but I have opened an exception for her because she's that awesome. ^^

Tagging: @jaypentaghast, @unhinged-nonsense, @hearfrost, @waterghoulcalamity, @andy4yippee, I tried to tag more people here, but it didn't work so... If anyone sees this and wants to answer, consider yourself tagged because I love finding more about y'all. :)

Anyway, this got too long because whenever I'm given an opening to talk about things I love I lose control... But here we go. :p

9 People You Want To Know Better!

Three ships: I'm terrible at picking a favorite anything, or even a top 3, I have like 12 or 13 ships that I'm equally obsessed with... But these are *SOME* of them. <3

Emisue (Dickinson)

Is it a gay thing to have beautiful kisses that look like a Renaissance painting? They're such a beautiful ship, but they impacted me on a personal as well. This was the first time I saw a queer ship that was beautifully written, had loads of chemistry and was executed with care (the fact they had so many queer people and women on the show, specially Ella - who played Sue - made everything even better). They weren't your subtle and digestible queer ship for conservatives and they weren't overly sexualized for straight people with a fetish. They were something else. The way their problems weren't really about being queer/internalized queerphobia and even individual things like Emily's 'coming out scenes' being full of acceptance, support and even celebration were SO FULFILLING. It was amazing to watch from a viewer point of view, but also really formative to me as I came to find and embrace more of myself.

Malina (Shadow and Bone)

Mind you that they aren't even together here, they're just imagining each other, it's just that the chemistry was THAT awesome. First love. Childhood love. Friends to lovers. Linked by destiny. Can just sense one another. They'll always find each other. But they also chose one another and made their own story in a way destiny never could do it for them. The world against them and them against the world. "It was always you". Malina mixed all my favorite tropes and some that I hated with a passion and created a masterpiece.

Royjamie (Ted Lasso)

A lot of their problems stemmed from the fact they were thirst for each other and they would've fixed things sooner if they'd just been grown ups about it and fucked yk. These two were meant to be a big part of each other's arc, but the fact they got even bigger than what it was initially planned because the actors were inseparable and crazy about each other? And the chemistry was that amazing? And how they grew so much as individuals and boyfriends through the seasons? And 3x06 that was basically the cutest and longest date ever with them exploring Amsterdam from morning to late at night, opening up, trying new things, riding a bike together etc? And how Phil and Brett are just one of the cutest, messiest, most insane and chaotic best bros in real life who kind of lost focus and had a consensual workplace relationship just makes everything SO MUCH BETTER.

First ship: I can't remember for sure, but if this wasn't the very first, it was the second, tops.

Villadero/Cordueva (Jane the Virgin)

Jane and Michael are really special to me because I think so often couples are about the flirting, sensuality and physical attraction, and it's not that they don't have that because they definitely do, but I think ships usually lack more. And when they do have more, it's usually a will-they-won't-they, on-and-off, love triangles, fights etc, because apparently writers believe dragging things out to the point it gets unbearable is better than just letting them have a stable and deep relationship? Specially back then, now things are getting better (I still think we're taking baby steps, but at least there's some progress), but Jane and Michael were the VERY FIRST couple I saw having that kind of relationship and it was a life-changing moment in television for me. That's not to say they didn't have some of those problems, they did, but they actually worked on them and evolved as people and a couple. I got to see them from their first meet cute (and it was the BEST meet cute ever), him getting a noise complaint about her 21st birthday party and a drunk Jane confusing him for a stripper, grabbing and shooting his gun, only to find out he was a real cop and then not only he didn't arrest her, but spent the whole night talking to her while she sobers up, getting to genuinely know her until it was morning?! Really, doesn't get more wholesome than that. And I saw them become full committed adults who grew together through the years, them working on their careers, Jane starting her first book, Michael getting his first medal, Michael being a close friend to her parents instead of just being a son-in-law to them, the two getting married, living together, being a family, going back home to each other at the end of a long day, going out to have some fun time... Being more than just two people who are attracted to each other, but two people who loved fully each other in every aspect of the word, who were best friends, confidants, who genuinely enjoyed each other's company, who would crack up out loud together, that had a life inside and inside and out of home. It was a gift. And so much of it was the natural chemistry of the actors that got along so well and loved that pairing, too. No wonder the entire cast rooted for them.

Last song: Fur Elise by Faouzia

There are ONLY THREE singers/groups in the world that I'm truly obsessed with and Faouzia is one of them. Her music is out-of-this world, specially her powerful voice and beautiful melodies (she has my favorite melodies ever). Tomorrow she'll be on the finals of a singing competition and she really deserves to win, specially after working herself like crazy making, recording AND releasing new songs, music videos, commercials, doing full concerts and even learning a bit of freaking Chinese ALL IN JUST *TWO* MONTHS! As I get ready to vote like crazy for her tomorrow, I'm listening to all of her songs for good luck. :p And Fur Elise is one of my favorite songs ever and a true masterpiece.

Last TV show: Interview with the Vampire.

Currently reading: Six of Crows by Lady Bardugo, but I'm gonna start The Vampire Chronicles soon. I have no idea if I will like them, let alone love it as much as the show (it's my favorite show in the universe), but I'm so curious to get to know the characters, be able to fully talk about the universe with other fans and know what can possibly happen in the future seasons that I will do it anyway... I just need to figure out where to begin, because I want to skip the first book (for now) since the show has already covered it. I hope it's possible to start with a book that has all the main characters that appear on the show, but I'm still gathering information to know what's necessary to read and what isn't, the best order to do it etc. :p Anyway, I have attention issues so that will surely be tricky, but I'm just so curious about IWTV that I have to do it, lol. And I also can't drop SoC or I'll forget it and will have to start it from scratch all over again... I've read like 3/4 of the book so I can't let that go to waste either lmao. I'll just give certain days of the week to each book and eventually finish them (hopefully in time for season 3), lol.

Currently watching: Still Up, Silo, House of the Dragon, The Purge, The Lazarus Project. I'm pretty early into these shows and don't really know what to think about them yet, though. I do have a soft spot for Antonia Thomas because she played one of my favorite and nicest characters ever (Claire Browne, The Good Doctor), so it's good to see her face. And Silo has Chinaza Uche, who had a supporting role in Dickinson, but he was so charismatic that I wanted to see him have a longer screen time somewhere else. I hear he's been promoted to a bigger role on season 2, so let's hope I make that far and get to see him shine lol. I also have some shows with sapphic and/or non-binary/androgynous/fluid characters people recommended that I'm gonna try. :)

Currently eating: Nothing, but the last thing was steak, rice and potatoes. :p

Currently craving: Also nothing, but the last time I craved anything was a cheeseburger with cheddar. Not even joking when I say it's been over a year since I had one lol. #fml

[disasterbijamietartt]

Putting my Roy x Jamie tinhat back on!

In my queer Roy post I mentioned his double life with his yoga besties and compared it with Colin’s situation (in the sense of “which other character is shown to hide aspects of himself? Oh, surprise, the gay one!”), but thinking about it further I realised that essentially Jamie was leading a double life in season 1 as well.

Jamie was pretending to be someone he deep down was not to please his father. We saw the hints of the “real” Jamie mainly in his interactions with Keeley. He always was soft and sweet and fun with her. Even after their breakup he was open and vulnerable. No hint of him trying to hide his real self behind some mean and bitchy persona.

And then I noticed a big difference between Roy, Colin and Jamie: Colin and Jamie are true to themselves and don’t hide aspects of themselves when they’re around their intimate partners—Roy on the other hand is like two different people when he is around his yoga besties vs. when he is around Keeley (and Phoebe). He is softer with Keeley, yes, but … he is still keeping his insecurities from her, doesn’t like her to see him soft and vulnerable, even though she should be the person closest to him. And he obviously is keeping things from his yoga besties as well (who for sure are convinced he’s their gay mascot, you can’t convince me otherwise.) He seems repressed to a degree where he is never fully himself with anyone.

When I saw this gif set I also realised how this is the only time I can recall that Roy wears something that is not black-ish (aside from the Richmond kit, but that is not something he decides to wear)—interestingly it is a subdued orange; who else is wearing orange in this scene? (And who was wearing orange in Amsterdam? In the pride flag orange symbolizes healing, btw.)

The only colorful things Roy ever wears are his socks, that he can easily hide in his shoes. (Edit: The socks he wears in the scene mentioned above? Same colors as the pansexual pride flag.🤡)

I don’t know yet where specifically I’m going with this—maybe it just illustrates another way Roy x Keeley never truly worked, maybe I’m actually onto something with my queer Roy agenda, but the thought was nagging me, so I wanted to share it with you lol.

Anyway, if we get queer Roy we’ll likely know by tomorrow or at least get some less subtle hints.

(I’m so excited, like, not a shred of me believes they could still be going for Roy x Keeley endgame🤡, so I’m here with my clown makeup muttering to myself “Tomorrow we’ll find out whether they go Jamie x Keeley or Jamie x Roy (x Keeley, on the horizon)” and I’m not ready)

[singaroundelay]

Is it too late to meta about last week's episode? Because I need to meta about last week's episode.

The locker room scene.

While I've been working on this week's fic — I've re-watched this scene so many times, mostly focusing on Trent. The look on his face as he watches everyone else around him.

(We'll skip what feels like the super intentional cuts after Beard says "So there are probably more people in this room who are gay" and we cut from Trent then immediately to Ted.)

I want to know how close Trent was to speaking up in that locker room. Because, frankly, I think it was very close.

The set-up is there. Colin told Trent at the homomonument in Amsterdam that he doesn't want to be a spokesperson. He just wants a quiet life with the ability to kiss his fella after they win a match. Yet when the rest of the team starts speculating about if Isaac is the one who's gay... Trent looks ready to speak up if Colin can't. Isaac isn't in the room. He shouldn't be assigned a sexuality — particularly when he's not there to defend himself. (or confirm. or deny.)

Trent knows he's the one with the pretty words and knows how to wield them to his own advantage. (Good or bad, as Roy will attest.) He has the age and the ability to leave the team if necessary without destroying Ted's perfectly crafted house of cards that is needed for Total Football.

But in the end he doesn't have to, because Colin finds the courage that, perhaps, Trent doesn't have.

Trent is the one whose closet door is open. Who is comfortable wearing leopard print shoes and having a rainbow mug and rainbow bracelets. He has the hair and the whole vibe going on here. Who won't deny who he is, but isn't going to be marching in this year's parade. But somehow it seems like actually stepping out of the closet is something he's not ready for. Even if it's to the club.

But after he talks to Colin and they have that moment — he stops and turns back. I'll put my tinfoil hat back on here because damnit, when he turns back he looks right at where Ted was standing.

The only reason Colin was able to come out was because Ted created a culture of trust at AFC Richmond. So, maybe, it's a club who will support the gaffer stepping out with the team novelist, too.

[devotioncrater]

predictions for amsterdam:

1. colin gay bar scene with michael (trent's there too)

2. jan maas taking the himbos out and around amsterdam

3. sam and rebecca in the van gogh museum and they talk about what happened between them

4. beard living his best ziggy stardust nightlife

5. will and higgins jazz club adventure that ends up linking everyone's individual storylines together

6. roy and jamie 4AM jogging together as per routine but they end up Having A Moment under the lamplights

7. ted teaching trent how to ride a bike and they end up Having A Moment

8. beard saving rebecca from her fall into the canal, still dressed in his ziggy stardust inspired outfit

9. "goodnight, sport" reprise in the hotel hallway but with a parallel kiss to roykeeley

[croptoppoprocks]

More than anything, I want a scene where Ted finds out Trent is gay and implies that he didn’t know while Trent is standing there with his rainbow mug, leopard print shoes, and just gay ass demeanor like “are you being serious??” Like I know the implication of the Amsterdam episode was that most people don’t know but also just look at him

[faramirsonofgondor]

You're right about samjamie and you should say it!!! People ignore how cute their dynamic is, and the fact that they are constantly hugging/leaning on each other. Sam was pivotal in Jamie's growth and Jamie was key to making Sam a more assertive leader (in nice and not so nice ways). The material is RIGHT THERE and everyone ignores it!

yes! i think one of the most important aspects of their relationship is the fact that they CHOOSE to be close to each other, to support each other, and to love one another. in s1 jamie was a major bully to sam and hurt his confidence, and when jamie came back in s2 it would’ve been so easy for sam to write jamie off as a lost cause and move on. but he gave jamie the opportunity to prove himself, and jamie came through and supported him, and further acknowledged that sam was a good person who did a good thing despite the fact that they lost their match. now, from there it would also be easy for sam & jamie to remain distance from one another while still be cordial/friendly teammates. but from then on we see that they actively seek each other out & chose to grow closer. when the player jamie pissed off fouls him, sam is there. when sam decides to use his one haircut for his date with rebecca, jamie is there despite his inner turmoil and only leaves when he knows no one else will notice. i also think it’s very important to note that after what happened at wembley, sam immediately decides to seek out comfort in pursuing his most recent romantic encounter (rebecca), which i think highlights that sam was also feeling hurt for jamie and chose to pursue romantic relief (which maybe says something about how he feels about jamie). they continue to show their love and support for each other throughout the season.

then we get into s3 (yikes). while sam is also one of the people caught up in the zava whirlwind, it doesn’t necessarily diminish his relationship with jamie. while i do think it did hurt jamie that sam didn’t notice his struggles or check in on him, i think jamie was more hurt by the fact that NOBODY did, rather than just sam. and i think he shows more leeway towards the members of the team than he does the coaches in their obsession with zava because he understands that they’re still young and that’s it’s still easy to get caught up in all that. i also think it’s important to note that jamie still shows up to sam’s restaurant (wearing the sexiest outfit he could find) to support him despite being upset, and he doesn’t try to let his feelings overshadow the overall atmosphere. while i know some people see this as jamie being a team player, i think it has more to do with his relationship with sam than does it with that because we see him walking out of team meditation and showing more obvious disdain towards zava during the scene when they’re in the gym and zava steals his speech. then when we get to amsterdam, as roy is yelling at jamie on the bus, we see that jamie’s first reaction is to look towards sam (we see this in other moments where roy is being unhinged). in the strings that bind us, when the team flips off jamie, we notice him lingering on sam’s finger (which is quite close to his face) before speaking up. later when sam finds the team cleaning up his restaurant, jamie is the first one to answer sam’s question about why they chose to help out. in the next episode sam and jamie walk and discuss something together after the team finds out about the leak and deletes their nudes. then in la locker room aux folles, the camera focuses on a multitude of people turning towards jamie after the “somebody else in this room could be gay” but we don’t see sam’s (who jamie had shared a cute moment with like three minutes prior) reaction. when jamie does his little “i’m flattered” and the team laughs it off, only then do we see sam, who says they shouldn’t discuss it further. then we get a cute moment between jamie and sam when sam does his captain speech. skip to international break, jamie, after hearing that he’s making his england debut, immediately goes to see if sam is alright and tells him that he got screwed over. then, jamie chooses to wear sam’s number while he’s playing for england (just get married already). when jamie is having his breakdown during the press conference in mom city, sam is immediately worried about jamie’s behavior/attitude. i think the only reason we don’t see him checking in on jamie is because he can acknowledge that it might be easier for jamie to give space and let jamie come to him if he needs to.

i think the fact sam is able to give jamie space while also supporting him and letting jamie give him love in return is what makes it one of the healthiest jamie ships. while roy and jamie do have chemistry, roy is very resistant to jamie’s attempts to show support/comfort towards him. keeley, on the other hand, is unable to adequately support jamie while she’s trying to support and heal herself. sam and jamie have each others full and unconditional support, and sam is receptive towards jamie’s shows of love. i think this is essential to helping jamie heal because he hasn’t been able to show other men love and be met with love and reception in return. furthermore, sam doesn’t expect jamie to tell him all his secrets or come to him straight away, he has enough patience to let jamie work things out on his own, and will be there if jamie needs to come to him. this contrasts both roy and keeley’s approaches to getting jamie to open up during mom city, where roy yells and then somewhat comforts jamie and keeley brings up his worries in an attempt to gauge his feelings, and then they both proceed to stalk him until he reaches his mothers house. it wasn’t roy or keeley that made jamie feel better, it was jamie who knew what he needed and sought out his mother to comfort and reassure him. both keeley and roy are a bit restricting towards jamie and allowing him to express his feelings, with s1 keeley not explaining what made her upset (not communicating her boundaries) and laughing at his discomfort/fear with roy during the auction (dissuading him from communicating his own boundaries in fear of rejection/not being taken seriously). roy on the other hand attempts to manipulate jamie’s behavior and undermine the feelings jamie is expressing in those actions such as when pushes jamie into saying the ‘ugly boy’ thing and ignores the fact that jamie is clearly uncomfortable and that he has a lot of power over jamie in this scene, or when he tries to manipulate jamie into “backing off” keeley. when his attempts to manipulate jamie backfire, he tries to silence jamie through intimidation and physical aggression. overall, while it may not be intentional, both keeley and roy limit jamie’s behavior to the point where cannot fully express himself without fear of repercussions (whether that be mockery, rejection, or aggression). meanwhile jamie has the space to express himself how he wants when he’s with sam, and he doesn’t have to worry about being mocked or attacked for it. sam takes him and his emotions seriously in a way that others do not (although there could still be some improvement in that area for sam).

additionally, jamie is a great partner for sam because jamie is a very honest person and he is willing to learn, grow, and change. i think sam would value honesty a lot, because sometimes it’s better to hear what you need to hear rather than what you want to hear. From what we can tell, ola seems to be a very open and honest person as well, which is probably why sam values the truth. it’s also clear that sam likes it when others listen to him and ask for his input and jamie is willing to listen to sam and learn what sam’s boundaries are and he would respect those the best he could. i also think it’s important that jamie is one of the few people who shows pride in sam and recognizes his achievements and tells him that he should be proud of himself. when jamie has the opportunity to be jealous of sam becoming captain, he takes pride and joy in seeing him take on a new role instead. when sam doesn’t get picked to play for nigeria, jamie is the one to make sure sam knows that he deserved to play. when they lost their match after the dubai air protest, jamie is one to rally the team into celebrating sam and acknowledges the bravery of sam’s actions. they are just so perfect for each other!!!

[creatureofseafoam]

I need Trent Crimm in his leather jacket sauntering to the gay bar in Amsterdam only to find Colin there.

I want them having a parallel conversation to these two where it’s older person mentoring/supporting someone younger. Leslie and Will both have very bright spirits in this intense sports environment just like how Colin and Trent are both (probably) queer in the sports environment that isn’t typically accepting of that lifestyle.

If Trent and Colin don’t have at least one scene together in all the 63 minute run time we get, I will riot. Neither of them were featured in the stills for this episode so it must mean something right. Right?

[gottagobackintime]

I honestly did not expect to react the way I did to this episode, or rather, the scenes with Trent and Colin. I knew they'd been seen filming outside a gay club/bar in Amsterdam, I've seen Trent as gay since season 1. And yet I cried, and I cry while re-watching those scenes, and I tear up thinking about Trent's reassurance and the "I haven't said anything to anyone. I must have a good reason for that, mustn't I?" I think it's about being seen. Being seen by fellow queer people, not feeling alone.

And we were right, we are not delusional. We were fucking right about Trent!

[thetarttfuldickhead]

Do you have any headcanons about Jamie's first time with a guy/figuring out his sexuality?

Truth be told, sweet nonny, I’m too agnostic about the whole thing to have any properly formed and firm headcanons. Depending on context and my mood, I can see dizzingly divergent takes and be “oh yeah that makes sense” about all of them.

I mean, Jamie’s bisexual, and unconcerned about it, I’m pretty firm on that one. But as for how he came to that realization and what he’s actually done – or not done – with guys…

I can see him figuring it out early and being chill about it but never pursuing because football and his dad and the like. It’s an ache, a grief, and a quiet anger, but what’s the use in worrying over it, he’s fine anyway, not like he minds girls, fucking loves them, so what does it even matter if there are times when his eyes fall on that pretty boy across the room and he wants and he wants and he wants.

I can see him figuring out absolutely nothing. Not that he doesn’t realize that he’s attracted to guys, but he… just doesn’t really think about it, never really labels it, doesn’t really see it as a matter of identity (ie “I am bisexual”)? It’s more like fleeting thougths of huh, that guy is hot, be nice to fuck him, doesn’t seem convenient, oh well and that’s that, nothing that worries him, nothing he spends much time thinking about. (And sometimes it does seem convenient, and that’s good fun, innit, that’s brilliant – but again, nothing he spends too much time thinking about.)

I can see him knowing what he wants and pursuing it at quite a young age, determined and persistent as he will be in all the things he cares about. Young Jamie is softer than the man he’ll grow up to be, but the confidence is already there, and the swagger. He’s good at knowing when someone’s interested in him, and good at convincing them that fooling around with him is a great idea. He has a lot of fun, young Jamie, and learns a lot about himself and about all the ways he can make others feel good.

I can see him daring just a few, covert encounters during his Academy days, player seeking player in the shadows, and there’s joy in it, but there’s also the knowledge that this must stay in the shadows, always. This must never be spoken about, or known.

I can see Roy being his first experience with another man. Maybe it’s new to both of them and maybe they’re a little unsure, a little fumbling, but they have such fun figuring the whole thing out, and in this – as in so much else – they just fit.  

Or maybe it’s new to Jamie but not to Roy and Roy fucking loves that because let’s face it, he totally gets off on bossing Jamie around and training him and, well, Jamie takes direction so very, very well. Jamie is a quick study too, and full of initiative; it won’t be long before he starts bringing his own ideas to the table. Bed. Whichever is nearest.

Maybe it’s new to Roy and not Jamie and that works too, because vulnerable Roy is absolute darling and Jamie would be considerate and caring and very patient, and only tease when he knows it wouldn’t actually upset Roy. (Like, imagine the Amsterdam bicycle scene, but with gay sex.)

Maybe Jamie and Keeley talk about it early on, their dreams and their fantasies, and in the end they pick up a third, they pick up a boy for Jamie, and it’s as hot as he always though it would be, but feels so much safer than he ever knew it could, because Keeley is there to call the shots and make sure everything goes smoothly. They do it again, and again, with boys and girls and others. (One day, this will make the notion of them both dating Roy a very obvious one.)

Just… all the things, you know? They’re all good, and good fun.