#american tumblr makes me want to pull my hair out at times

[johnwickb1tsch]

John Wick x You │Tarasov's Daughter

You are the eldest daughter of Viggo Tarasov. You’re smart enough to take over the family business, but you’ve always been overlooked because you’re a girl (their loss). But John Wick sees you. In fact he saw a lot of you, once, when he’d been your bodyguard for a brief time during a turf war back in the day. You’re not sure who seduced who really, but you’ve never forgotten the feeling of his big hands digging into your hips or his teeth in your shoulder while he fucked you against the marble top of your bathroom sink, watching you go to pieces for him in the mirror. Maybe he was even your first! You seethed with jealousy when you heard he left the Underworld to get married to a nice normal American lady and settle down in domestic bliss. You were actually allowed to DO that? No one in this life ever really got out. You can’t help but think that you could have made him just as happy as some boring middle-aged photographer. Helen. What a stupid name. So when the shit hits the fan after your dumbass brother Iosef disrespects John Wick (and kills his dog, what the actual fuck?) you wonder if John will come after you.

Pick your poison: Canon!John Wick │ Dark!John Wick │ Yandere!John Wick

18+, all the warnings, dead dove do not eat! Predator kink, size kink, kidnapping, dub-con, brat taming, dark!john, mean!John, yandere!John , jesus fucking crist tumblr u have broken me…🙃

Canon!John Wick

John doesn’t hurt women unless they are really REALLY giving him no choice (Looking at you, Perkins!). But you are the means to his end, so he doesn’t hesitate to take you for bait for Iosef and your father’s men. He is raw and back in full predator mode after taking a hiatus for five years. Of COURSE you piss him off, and when you try to escape he snaps. He still calls you moya milaya printcessa (my sweet princess)tho while he fucks you against the wall with his hand on your throat. When the idiots your father employs do finally come for you John kills them all, and your brother, and your uncle after taking back his car. He lets you go, and a part of you forever wishes that he’d kept you…

Dark!John Wick

You were always such a fucking brat back when he had to watch over you, and finally he can get his revenge. When you mouth off he undoes his tie and uses it to gag you, something he’s always wanted to do, and as you watch him whip off his belt with such calculated flourish you are practically sliding off your chair. He bends you over his knee, the way someone should have a long time ago, and he taunts you when he finds you’re soaking with slick in between whipping you. Is it just you, or is he not hitting you half as hard as he could tho? You don’t know and you don’t care, you’re 98 percent sure you’re not getting out of this alive, so you at least want to die having had his magnificent manhood inside you one last time. You are delirious by the time he soothes the welts on your ass with the light touch of his fingers. “Are you going to be my good little girl now?” he demands as he tosses you on the bed like you’re just a ragdoll. Like he wants to hear your reply, he removes his tie from your mouth.

“If you fill me up with that big beautiful cock of yours.”

He laughs at you, and you get the feeling he’s delighted by your sass, even in this cruel mood. “You don’t get to make the demands anymore, milaya.” He slaps your thighs apart and goes down on you, licking you relentlessly, bringing you to the edge again and again but never letting you cum.

“Please, please, please,” you beg and tears stream down your face as finally you watch him undo his pants. He has utterly broken you.

“You always were such fucking whiner,” he hisses, pulling your hair hard as he plunges himself inside your swollen cunt. You hate him for how good it feels as he fills every last inch and corner of you, and if you ever get your hands free you’re so going to make him pay for this.

Yandere!John Wick

John always carried a torch for you, but you were so off limits. The boss’s daughter. A sure death sentence, but it almost would have been worth it. He’d thought about you constantly for a good long while, your beauty and your body was burned into his brain, but then he met Helen, and that fire smoldered to red hot coals he kept in the back room of his twisted black heart. But when Iosef starts shit there is absolutely nothing to stop him from taking what he’s always wanted. He’ll make you his perfect little pet, one last bit of revenge against the Tarasovs for disrespecting him after all he’d done for them.

When you see him materialize from the shadows in the mirror behind you, you try to go for the gun you keep in the top drawer of your vanity. You’re half certain he’ll kill you for it, but you’re y/n Viggovna Fucking Tarasov, and you will not fucking beg like your little bitch of a brother undoubtedly did. You’re not surprised when he manages to disarm you in the blink of an eye. You wait for the blade in your throat or the gunshot in your gut but he just holds you in those inexorably strong arms, looking down at you with those burning dark eyes. He’s so tall, he’s so much bigger than you and that always turned you on.

“You’re mine now, printcessa.”

You know you’ve always been his but you hate being helpless. He kisses you hard, unforgivingly, possessively, and you try to bite him but he knocks you out with a headbutt. Ouch!

You wake up in a luxuriously appointed room that you just know in your gut is now your new prison. Wick is no fool. There are digital locks on the doors. There are windows that you know will be unbreakable. Your hands are bound above your head, and though you try to worm free it’s impossible. After a while John enters, straddling you on the bed. Even though your legs are free his weight pins you down, you are trapped, and you’re embarrassingly certain he can feel the heat that’s pooling between your legs for it. His face is covered in cuts, his knuckles are torn. He’s been through Hell, but he came out the other side, the way you begrudgingly knew he would. “Your family’s dead,” he tells you. “No one’s coming for you.” He doesn’t really seem to take any joy in it, his handsome face stoic as stone. “You belong to me now, and I hope your father rolls over in his grave every time I defile you.”

You try not to enjoy it while he rails you into the soft mattress, or when he touches you while he does it, his long fingers so exacting. He is a master of manipulating the human body, for pain or for pleasure. You think he makes you cum out of ownership over anything remotely tender, but he makes you see God so often it almost feels like he cares about you. He becomes your dark deity, the altar you worship on, even if just in the deepest depths of your heart. You still have some pride.

You still try to fight and still try to run, even though he punishes you every time. Maybe you’re made bold by the fact that he hasn’t killed you, where he killed everyone else. They were kind of assholes though. John kept you, after all, and you can’t fault his taste. You think he secretly loves the chase, maybe even admires you for fighting him when there really is no hope. He loves reminding you who is in charge though too, and on nights when he’s in a particular mood you know you won’t be able to sit without feeling it for a week.

[gaminggirlgeek]

Want and Desire is One and the Same: Part 1

Being a secretary to Dr. Sabine Callas wasn't that bad given the pay and the (albeit, distracting) company, but pulling an all-nighter with the American Chemist had led her to stare and think about you differently in every way possible.

Slow Burn fic that I made at 3am because I think I've read every Viper x reader here on tumblr 😭

"Pulling an all-nighter today, Doc?" You smile as you look up from your desk to see Sabine going through a pile of documents with furrowed brows. She simple gave you an irritated "Mhm" before pinching the bridge of her nose.

"Want some coffee?"

"No." Sighing, you stand and walk towards the kitchen area and reach for the cupboard to get some coffee beans and two mugs for the both of you. Tonight was just one of those nights where Sabine was increasingly irritated and she'd end up killing herself without at least a sip of caffeine.

However, little did you know that the papers were not the only things plaguing her mind at the moment. From her desk, Sabine took in the shape of your body as your pencil skirt hugged your waist and how your white satin blouse shone in the dim light of the room. You looked like fruit just ripe for the taking.

Professionalism looks incredibly nice on Sabine, but she couldn't help but thirst for you. She loathed mornings but ended up loving them because you'd be the first thing she sees. She'd notice how you tie your hair up when you're stressed; the lip products you reapply in the afternoon that would make your lips look oh, so, kissable and even your perfume that made you smell so delectable. She'd even notice how the other agents looked at you. You were a pretty little thing, a breath of fresh air from the hustle and bustle of the Valorant Protocol and the peculiarities inside it. It was natural for the other agents to be drawn to you. She did not just thirst for you, she desired you with all her heart. The only thing stopping her was the thought of you saying 'no'.

"Want some milk with your coffee?" You said with a cheerful tone in your voice. Sabine snapped out of her daze and went back to reading the reports in her hands.

"Black coffee, please." You smiled and proceeded to brew her cup.

Sabine was this (🤏) close to grabbing you and holding you against the kitchen counter. Moments like these where the two of you are alone were ones she dreaded the most because of how vulnerable you were.

'This is not the time.' Viper reminded herself mentally. After preparing your beverage you placed your cup on your desk first before heading towards Sabine, cup and saucer in hand. Sabine watched as you placed her cup on her desk. You leaned towards her and she could almost smell your perfume and she eventually turned away with the papers in her hand with a sigh.

That worried you as she was particularly more irritable than normal. You decided to engage in some small talk.

"Hey, Doc? Placing all your attention on those reports isn't gonna make you any more annoyed than you already are, you know." Viper turned towards you and narrowed her eyes.

"You talking to me while I'm doing so isn't helping." You smiled and giggled silently. These conversations made your work more enjoyable.

"Please, just a sip of your coffee. It'll help." Viper simply clicked her tongue.

With a sigh, you return to typing into your laptop.

"You have got to take it easy because doing this at midnight with no sleep during the day is going to kill you. Like, get a distraction or something." Viper looked up from her papers and her eyes widened a bit. She then placed the papers on the table and leaned back on her chair, resting her head on her hand and staring at you. You noticed and looked up too, heart beating fast as you observed her gaze to be more, intense, than usual.

"And what might you suggest be my distraction for moments like these?" You gulped, and cleared your throat. Joking wouldn't be so bad at this time, right?

"How about me? Talk to me or something!" Viper smiled and stood up from her chair. She was towards you and stopped behind you; placing her hands on your shoulders.

"I know something more interesting and fun than just talking," She then leans towards your ear, and you could feel her breath against your ear. "..but I bet you wouldn't be able to handle it, anyway." Your eyes widen.

"L-like what?"

"Take a guess." Vipers' grip on your shoulders tighten slightly before slowly sliding her hands down your arms. You tremble from the contact before inhaling sharply.

"...I'm talking about reading the reports with me, of course." She turns your wheelchair for you to face her, and she greets you with the hottest grin you've ever seen.

"Unless you thought about something else." Viper says with a low tone.

"You sound like you're insinuating something, Dr. Callas." You fold your arms and look at her with a determined look.

"Am I? You made the suggestion." Viper walked away and sat back down on her chair, eyeing the documents before scanning them once again.

Before you knew it, your cheeks turned red and you shifted in your seat.

'That was...something.' You smiled and returned to typing into your laptop.

[polkadotsocks1993]

What Good Neighbors Do Pt. 2

Modern Osferth x Reader

Warnings: mentions of difficult family situations, mentions of neglect/emotional abuse

This is a continuation of my first drabble posted yesterday. Thank you for the response! I will probably make a whole series.

Note:

First, let me know if you'd like to be included with a tag list. Also, if anyone can figure out how to do that, I would be grateful since I haven't been on tumblr since 2016 🤣.

Reader is from the American South, American Thanksgivings typically look a bit different down here (we eat a LOT).

Also: in this AU, Uhtred and the Boys were all in the British army (to make it applicable to modern situations). There are mentions of Uhtred and Finan cross training with the American army, and that actually happens quite a bit. Just in case that question comes up.

It was your first Thanksgiving away from your family, your first holiday in England. Thanksgiving had always been a special holiday for your family, but this would be the first time in your life that you weren't spending it with them. For you, this would be a very hard week. Even though you'd found a close circle of friends in Osferth and your neighbors, you still missed home terribly.

You thought of how much you missed your family as you sat in the shared back garden with your new neighbors, Osferth, Sihtric, and Finan, as your landlord's wife, Thyra, threw the ball for her dogs and yours.

"You've been quiet, Y/N." Osferth observed. He had a cup of coffee in his hand, a habit you'd started him on when he (more often than not) joins you for dinner.

"I'm sorry, guys. I guess I'm just a little homesick. Thanksgiving is this Thursday, and this is the first year I've never been with them." You explained.

"I hate to hear that." Osferth said, "What does Thanksgiving look like for you?"

"Where do I even start?" You chuckle, "Me, my mom, my grandmother, my sister, and my aunts all spend days cooking all kinds of food and desserts. My dad starts the night before, smoking different kinds of meats. The whole family comes to my grandparents' farm. We play games, we eat, we go see the farm animals. It's a lot of fun, and I'm really sad I have to miss it."

"I thought you only ate turkey on Thanksgiving?" Sihtric asked.

"Not my family. My dad usually makes different kinds of barbecue. Everyone in the family likes something different." You explained.

"I'd pay good money to have barbecue again." Finan said, taking a sip of his tea. During his time in the Army, he'd briefly trained in America with Uhtred.

"Where did you and Uhtred go, Finan?" Y/N asked.

"Kentucky, Texas." Finan said, "Still the best ribs I've ever had."

You laughed, "I'm convinced you would let yourself get kidnapped if there was food involved, Finan. That goes for you too, Osferth."

Osferth chuckled, tussling your hair slightly.

"If it was your food, maybe." Osferth replied.

You blushed; over the last few months, you and Osferth had grown very close, but neither of you seemed to want to be the first to venture outside of just friendship. You flirted constantly, and it was obvious to everyone how you both felt, but neither of you seemed compelled to take the leap.

"What if we had a Thanksgiving?" Came Thyra's question, throwing the ball for your dog, Brownie.

"I, for one, would not say no to more food." Finan said.

"I could make plenty of food. I'm sure it could be really nice." You said.

"I could help you," Osferth offered, "I'm sure it couldn't be too hard."

"I could help, too." Thyra said, coming over to sit with the four of you, "Gisela makes the best chocolate cake."

"Let's do it." You said, "It could be a little Friendsgiving. I think everyone would like it."

Osferth reached out, patting your shoulder lightly. "I think this is going to be a lot of fun."

You smiled at him, he was impossibly optimistic. You hoped you could pull this off.

-------------

When Thanksgiving came around, though, you had never regretted your decision more.

You only had one tiny oven in your flat, and only so much counter space. You were struggling keep up, and you'd run out of refrigerator space the day before.

Osferth and Finan had arrived at your place early that morning, and your stress rolled off of you in waves. Growing up, Thanksgiving was always a shared task, and you'd taken on the brunt of it. Osferth was the only one of the men who knew how to cook, and you'd immediately put him to work.

"What have you made, pray tell?" Finan asked, looking at the various dishes of food scattered everywhere.

"Well, Beocca and Uhtred are making the meat... I'm making mashed potatoes, cornbread stuffing, rice stuffing, macaroni and cheese, about four different casseroles, deviled eggs..." You trailed off, trying to remember everything Thyra, Gisela, and your other neighbor, Hild, were making. Sihtric and his girlfriend were also bringing a variety of desserts, since his girlfriend was a pastry chef.

"If we run out, I'm going to laugh." Osferth said. He was mixing the dough for the rolls, laughing softly as he tried to find room anywhere in your kitchen. You'd settled on the small table you'd found on the side of the road with Thyra--Finan had helped restore it--and there was barely any room left there.

"To be fair," You said sheepishly, "We usually have a long buffet line for the food, usually in my grandma's living room."

"What does everyone else do while the food cooks?" Osferth asked.

You laughed, taking a shot of whiskey to calm your nerves. "We drink. And play games."

"I like the drinking part." Said Finan, wearing one of your vintage aprons and pouring himself a bit of whiskey.

"Well, to be fair, some of us aren't allowed to drink anymore. Not since Thanksgiving five years ago." You said.

Osferth stopped making the rolls and looked up, "What happened five years ago?"

Osferth knew more about your family than the others, he knew part of the reason you'd chosen to move halfway across the world. He knew where this story was likely headed.

Taking another shot of whiskey to deal with the anxiety rising in your throat, you laughed. "Well, Thanksgiving five years ago is when half my cousins, mostly Aunt Lisa's kids, along with my Uncle Bobby, kind of started a brawl in the front yard. Half of us wound up going to jail."

"To JAIL?" Finan asked, putting yet another casserole in the oven.

"I didn't have to, but my sister did. You'd like my sister, Cassie. But anyway, I suppose my cousin Blake was three sheets to the wind, and I guess he took a swing at Cassie, and all I know is that by the time the deputies showed up, all of them were in the yard." You explained, getting the dish of macaroni and cheese ready.

"Sounds like fun." Finan said.

You shrugged. "It comes with its own problems."

"What do you mean?" Osferth asked.

"My family is big and loud. I love them, and I miss them, but I'm kind of the odd person out. I'm the first one to graduate from college. It's hard, sometimes, feeling like I'm out of place in my own family." You said.

"I know the feeling." Osferth said, a look in his eyes you hadn't seen before, "I've never actually spent a holiday with any family other than my uncle or my mum."

"Wait, what?" You asked.

Osferth shrugged, "My dad and my mum never married. He came around some, when I was little, but it was never consistent. He always gave her money, I guess, but then she got sick, and we moved in with my uncle Leofric. My dad got married, had more kids. His new wife didn't like me. She didn't want me around for holidays, always said that I made them look bad. My sister has always tried to reach out, but I never got to see what a big family holiday was like until I met Uhtred."

You and Finan both stood, mouths agape. As flustered as your family could make you, you'd never been outright excluded.

"My uncle never had a lot of money, growing up, especially after my mum died." Osferth added, "When I joined the Army and spent that first Christmas with Gisela and Uhtred, Gisela had gifts for me. Gisela and Uhtred practically raised me."

"Yes, yes they did." Finan said, trying to lighten the mood. Tears filled your eyes, your heart broken at the realization that the only family Osferth had ever really known was there, on that street. You couldn't help the urge, walking forward and putting your arms around him as tightly as you could.

You couldn't think of anything to say, you just kept your arms around Osferth for longer than necessary, and he didn't push you off. Of course, Osferth never rejected affection from you.

Cutting the tension, Finan cleared his throat.

"As cute as this is, I think we should probably find some tables, as there is more food here than this flat can hold and Y/N has evidently decided to feed the whole neighborhood. I'm going to go see if Beocca or Uhtred have any folding ones." Finan said, taking off the apron and placing it on the hook on the wall.

That left Osferth and you alone, for the first time in nearly a week. You couldn't help but smile as the whiskey warmed you and you turned on some music to help you finish cooking.

"Thank you, for helping me do this." You said, feeling a little more bold than normal.

"I can't say no to you." Osferth chuckled, watching you spin around in sock feet.

"I'm sure you could, if you wanted to." You teased.

"And why would I want to do that? Why say no, when I can watch you dance to some ancient old song?" Osferth teased. You playfully hit his stomach, laughing.

"Don't disrespect Dolly like that!" You exclaimed. He laughed in response, taking your hand and spinning you around.

Truthfully, even though you missed home, you found you'd never felt more at home than you did in your small kitchen, with Osferth.

---------------

As it turned out, there was so much food that tables had to be set up outside. Uhtred and Beocca had outdone themselves with ribs, chicken, roast beef, and ham. Gisela had brought a herring dish and chocolate cake. Thyra had made cabbage, roast vegetables, chicken tikka masala, and several desserts. Hild and Mr. Pyrlig had brought dishes too, and then there was the vast feast you and Osferth had made.

Truthfully, the neighborhood didn't need much of an excuse to get together, as you realized. Watching everyone stand around, talking and laughing, you realized that you'd found a family. You felt an arm sneak around your waist, and you looked around to see Osferth, who had snuck nearly half a tray of deviled eggs.

"I've never had these before, my uncle was not a good cook." He said.

"How many have you had today, Osferth?" You asked.

"I couldn't tell you. Not enough for me to regret it." He replied.

You gave him a playful nudge with your elbow and then went to grab a plate of food, taking a seat in between Osferth and Thyra. There wasn't a lull in conversation, everyone was having a good time and you couldn't help but feel warm watching everyone smile and laugh. Afterwards, you, Osferth, Finan, and Sihtric played with the children while everyone else ate dessert. Gradually, the day turned into night, and you were a bit sad to watch everyone go.

No fighting, no extra stress. As it turned put, everything had been perfect.

-----------

Later that night, in your tiny kitchen, you and Osferth washed and dried what appeared to be an endless pile of dishes, Thyra and Beocca boxing away leftovers to take to everyone in the neighborhood. You truly missed having a dishwasher then, though you didn't mind the company.

"You know, Osferth, you should have invited your uncle." You said, handing him a freshly washed baking dish.

"I would have, but it's a little late for that." Osferth said, drying the dish and putting it aside.

"Why?" You asked.

"He died when I was sixteen." Osferth replied, his voice a little hollow.

"Osferth, I'm so sorry. Could I ask...?" You began.

"How?" Osferth answered, "A roadside bomb in Afghanistan."

"You've been on your own since you were sixteen?" You asked.

Osferth shook his head. "No. I spent a month living with my dad, until his wife decided she couldn't stand the sight of me and kicked me out. Wound up getting sent to a boys' home, until Beocca and Thyra took me in. I had been staying with them while my uncle was deployed, turns out my uncle had named them my guardians in his will."

"Osferth..." You whispered, "I don't even know what to say. I'm so sorry. Why didn't you say anything?"

Osferth chuckled ruefully, wiping his forehead with his elbow. "Everyone else already knew. I don't talk about my family much, no one really wants to ask. I spent the better part of my life being the bastard throw away, as my stepmother used to tell me. Beocca and Thyra, Uhtred and Gisela, Finan, Sihtric...and even you make up for that."

You stopped washing the dishes, turning to look at Osferth. He wasn't very good at hiding his emotions; at least, not around you. You could see the lingering pain in his eyes. You moved to wrap your arms around him, hugging him as tightly as he'd let you. He rested his sharp chin on the top of your head, sighing heavily, as if he were letting go of a breath he didn't realize he held.

"For what it's worth, Osferth, I'm really, really glad you're here." You said, letting go just enough to look up at him. He smiled, placing a chaste kiss to your forehead.

"I'm glad you're here too, Y/N." Osferth replied.

There was a pause for a moment, both of you looking at each other with a vast array of words that you seemed to want to say. However, neither of you spoke, you simply returned to washing dishes.

You couldn't help but release a shaky sigh as your stomach did flips; it seemed that every time you were in Osferth's presence, you felt butterflies. You glanced over toward Osferth and noticed he was looking at you, too, giving a slight smile as he continued to dry the dishes.

You finished the night by watching a Christmas movie, Beocca and Thyra bidding you goodnight before they went upstairs to their own apartment. As you sat next to Osferth, you wished so badly that you could tell him all the things that were in the forefront of your mind.

However, his soft eyes watching the movie said that could wait for another day. He was there, with you, sharing in a favorite tradition.

Someday soon, you would tell him. Tonight, you thought, that it could wait.

------

Thanks for reading everyone!

[thekatebridgerton]

Some say Sophie's hair is dark blonde. I honestly don't like the idea of Lily James fancast because most people chose her cuz she plays Cinderella. Then again, the idea of inter-racial cast for Sophie just doesn't fit me. Please understand that I'm not being racist, I just feel like Benedict's story with Luke Thompson portraying him needs something more like what we see on "Pride and Prejudice" or "Emma" (different tropes, obviously).

So the question is, who's your fancast for Sophie Beckett?

YES someone who gets it about how boring the Lily James fancast is!! I’m so tired of people fan casting her as Sophie just because she’s seems to have been the best Cinderella in the last decade (and that’s a seriously low bar) but it’s time to let it go.

Although sorry about dissing Pride and Prejudice for a sec, because I’m seriously bored of P&P too. I mean Keira’s Pride and Prejudice came out in 2005. But for some reason, until Bridgerton came along, that seemed to be the only period drama worth talking about in Tumblr and it’s gotten old. Personally I love Lizzie, but there’s only so many repeats of that movie I can play for 18 years before I start watching Sense and Sensibility. Or the Jennifer Elhe version of P&P.

As a rule, it is fun for me to fancast Jessie Mei Li as Sophie because I’ve yet to see an Asian Cinderella outside of k-drama, and as someone who advocates for fully racially diverse casting in productions like Bridgerton. I want the Asians to have a larger representation…. And also because I like to bet against the odds, and deep down I know that given Shondaland track record of having so few Asians characters in her shows, the likelihood of Sophie being Asian is unlikely. So if it happens, It’ll bring me the highest emotional reward.

That being said, Sophie’s full name is supposed to be Sophia Maria Beckett. We never find out who her mother was, but given her name and what little we know of her mother, who was supposed to be in the theatre business, I assume her mother was a born Spanish or Italian speaker, so Sophie’s mom canonically was either Spanish, Italian, or South American. Since Sophia and Maria were common names for women in those regions at the time.

So if I’m fancasting book Sophie, I would fancast her as a blond haired South American actress. A friend of mine suggested Ana de Armas and now I can’t stop thinking about it. In fact I think I’m going to change my fancast in Gaslight Gatekeep Girlboss to Ana, because I would love to see her play Sophie, I saw her in Knives Out and Ghosted, and I think she’s got the mixture of cute and badass that would make her a perfect hardworking Sunshine Cinderella who punches Araminta. There’s a reason it’s not totally believable when she plays role of femme fatales, and it’s because she’s definitely got the type of cute innocent face that just doesn't lend itself well to sexy seductive action roles, even tough she's an excellent actress. In my opinion.

I think that Ana de Armas could in fact pull off the whole 'he didn't recognize her without a mask' scene and make it believable.

But in the end, if we were betting money, and if we were playing with the rules of probability, instead of against them. The most likely thing that’s going to happen, is that Sophie’s actress has already been casted and that she is black, or mixed raced black. And I’m saying this because it was foreshadowed in QC (or so my sources tell me) and also because Shonda is extremely predictable. In the sense that it seems to be what the majority of the viewers seem to want (when it's not Lily James)

So yeah that's the tea. Jessie Mei Li or Ana De Armas for Sophie.

[headingalaxys-spicy]

I have arisen from my deep slumber 😌

Could I request a part 2 for the Yandere Bully America ask? I like these kind of dynamics, which I also have discovered in another tumblr blog a few months ago, where America is being a total douche to the new country. I think their name was llamacup or something like that.

Anyway, have a nice day or night, thank you~

🥹😘

Hello there it’s 2023 and I’m filled with DETERMINATION ahahaha.

I want to answer all my story posts this year! 🌟

Tw: Death-of minor characters and torture.

✨⭐️Happy First Friday of the year⭐️✨

“You’ll never see the light of day again,” was a promise that hasn’t been broken.

Darkness became your new muse for crafting your mindset in captivity. Fear was on the loudspeaker having your mind teeter on the edge. When would you hear the dreaded clicks of his oxford loafers on the marble floor? Anxiety permeated your nervous system causing you to tremble like a neverending earthquake. How did things get this bad? Why, you? Why did it have to be you?

You felt hollow and sullen like a decaying tree succumbing to an infestation of black turpentine beetles. This is already after America stormed into your life like a hurricane and damaged you and your nation permanently with his supreme act of violence against you and Britain at the world meeting.

However while you may have been in captivity your love was not.

“Mr. Kirkland, how would you like us to give you some added assistance? We don’t have our duties at the palace today.” Some of his loyal long-time palace guards wanted to join in on Operation: Silent Alarm.

The messy golden haired blonde ceased his hurried pace towards the black Audi A1 car headed to the airport.

“It’s quite alright, gentlemen. I already have some of my best men with a solid plan to rescue Y/N.”

“Oh come on lad. You know that brute will definitely try to kill ye again. We can be a great backup after all we are trained and well equipped with weapons.”

Arthur couldn’t help but allow a small smile to form on his normally grumpy face. He loved how dedicated some of his people were to him and his royals. He still had to be as discreet as possible in order to get under that crafty American’s nose. It took him a few months in order to finally locate (Country Name). The bastard had her imprisoned in the New Hampshire wilderness underground in an elaborate labyrinth Alfred created back in the 60’s. He also had his pesky guards and security system to break through. Thankfully MI6 was more than ready to deal with this.

He again turned their offer down but requested that they be ready for him and his return with you. He would not be leaving without you. They relented and allowed him to leave so that the mission could begin. Arthur pressed the small button on his discreet earpiece.

“Testing operatives lavender and thyme do you read me? Have the both of you successfully landed in D.C. to carry on negotiations?”

A few moments drifted by while the diver started the car while Artheur continued to make sure all the pieces were in place for his rescue operation.

He waited tensely as he waited for a reply.

“Yes, operative Bluebell. We’ll let you know if we’ve located the Burger Man.”

“Copy that. Tally ho. To save y/n here we go.” Like a soldier getting ready to lead the charge on horseback Arthur sprints to his private jet that would take him just outside of Pittsberg, NH.

*******

After laying down in your own tears and mucus for what felt like a few minutes you lift your head up to look at the somewhat barren room you were confined to. It had the basics of what America thought you’d like to keep you entertained while you’re in captivity. A TV that had basic cable, Youtube, and Netflix. A plain (favorite color) journal, a stack of comic books and manga, art supplies, and a few old books that he clearly pulled from his attic in an attempt to try to find more things to entertain you since he plans on living the rest of your existence out in that tiny room.

You were beginning to go Stir-crazy from being confined for so long. Your only comfort was a man that you considered to be a monster that was crafted from a Stephen King novel. Your life became to that of a drawn out horror movie except the only difference is that the monster had taken a liking to you and fucked your brains out on numerous occasions.

“Damn it.” You spat in frustration. You growl under your breath, you wish the mental anguish would simply fade away. You begin to pace back and forth in your room. You listened carefully to the soft crunch of the marshmallow-like carpet given away under your feet. As you continued to do this for hours you eventually heard a few peculiar sounds that piqued your interest. At first you ignored it considering that what you were hearing was nothing more than maybe America or one of his staff milling about through the… where ever the fuck you were. Not that it mattered. No one could hear you nor could anyone-

The flatscreen TV that's mounted to your wall suddenly sparked to life. It startled you and you quickly jumped up in the air like a cat that’s seen a cucumber and flung yourself onto your plush bed and shielded yourself with your (favorite color) duvet.

“OH SHIT!”

“Y/N, Y/N do you can you hear me?” A familiar British accent called out from the screen.

With heavy drawn in breaths that filled your lungs it took you a few moments for your brain to recognize that it wasn’t the monster….

“Y/N?” He says much more gently this time. As if calling out to a severely injured dog. The tone was heavy with sadness. “Y/N… please …I hope you can hear me.”

A few tears pricked your eyes. His voice was the only thing that sounded like a daydream after being in this watered down version of hell.

“A…Arthur?” You say in a weak hoarse voice. There was still a voice in your mind screaming that it was a trick, a facade, a cruel prank that America was playing. All of the alarms in your brain were going off in a blaring symphony of panic. You were too afraid to remove your cover still and your shaking had begun again.

Silence hung over the room. You dared not to speak again.

Arthur stared at his screen that allowed him to see where you’d been imprisoned. He knew he had seen your slightly battered form run for the covers. He knew full well that you were not in the best headspace for any human nor country to be in. But he still had to try, because being left to America he'll surely turn you into a completely different country. You’d be unrecognizable. He tried not to think about all the ways that you’d change and did his best to put the images of you being America’s wife out of his mind.

Arthur called out once more with his voice cracking, this time you finally decide to take a peak from your massive duvet and look at the screen to see those dazzling emerald eyes. They were coated over with salt water that already began to spill onto his somewhat reddened cheeks.

“Oh my god it really is you. But…”

“Listen , Y/N we’ll save the heartfelt conversations for later. Let’s concentrate on getting you out of here. Within the next 30 seconds I need you to push your nightstand aside. One of my agents has constructed a tunnel that will lead you to the East and into the forest where I’ll be. I just need you to stay calm and….. It’s going to be okay.” He reassures you. Judging by the tension that you had in your face and the terror pouring from your eyes he knew he had to be more verbally accommodating to you in your fragile state.

‘Definitely going to ask France to make us a nice meal and I’ll actually have to be nice to get him to do it. Y/N is in some desperate need of pampering and escapism after this.’ He mused to himself.

You were still shaking tremendously. You hadn’t even registered his words in order to take action. However the agent Rosemary had reached you and effortlessly moved the nightstand from the hidden entrance that crumbled.

“(Country name)?” The agent calls out from the hidden tunnel. “Hurry, we have to get out of here. The guards are distracted but some of the other personnel will come to check on you and we have to allow the decoy take over for you before-”

Numerous footsteps pounding against the marble floor swarmed through the labyrinth. They began to draw nearer to your room.

“Y/N I promise it will be okay just listen to agent Rosemary. She’ll get you out of there safe and sound.”

“What are you guys going to use as a decoy?” Curious as to what your British love interest was scheming.

“This love.” A realistic hologram of you sprung to life from the screen. It was realistic. “Now tally ho. Get the hell out of there!” His transmission ends while your hologram continues to be projected through the screen. It wouldn’t be long before America’s guards figured out that it wasn’t you.

“My lady.” Rosemary pushed you into the escape route and you began to crawl for your life. With the agent right behind you couldn’t help but feel the tension that was in the pit of your stomach and made you somewhat nauseous. You had to cling to the fresher memory of Arthur in your mind to continue your escape and not be caught.

You had to get back to him you were determined to.

*******

In Washington, D.C. Burger Man I mean America was in a deadlock debate with Lavender and Thyme over trade deals. Agent Thyme’s golden hair swished violently as he pounded his fist against the table in heated debate with America.

“You can’t just harbor a personification and then begin a hostile takeover of their government and start spreading your propaganda like some twisted infestation! It’s illegal first and foremost. And second it VIOLATES THE ENTIRE BLOODY UNITED NATIONS CHARTER! And you’re supposed to be a LEADER?! You act like such a petulant child!”

“Funny that comes from a man that had more than half the world in the palm of his hand. How dare you insult me in my own senate.” He hissed back at England in pure defiance.

(they die at the end.)

“You’re acting like a super villain in one of your stupid comic books that you melt your already stupid brain with.”

The verdant versus aqua eyes collided with one another. Neither was the type to let their pride down. The air was tense with a thousand needles and no one wanted to be caught in the crosshairs. Teeth biting, nervous shifting, and over hundreds of eyes witnessing the showdown between two sworn enemies since the betrayal. Some cracked their knuckles to at least relieve some tension that was broiling within the room. America had reached the point where negotiations were at a stalemate and….

America’s earpiece beeped in his ear and although his facial expression stayed neutral and as distant as the moon. His eyes bled out with rage and stared out at ��England’ with a look that was meant to obliterate one within mere milliseconds. He stood up suddenly as if a giant had been awoken from a peaceful slumber and was in a terrible mood.

He snapped his fingers.

Secret service surrounded Thyme and Lavender. The ruse was up.

“Kill them. Right here. Right now. They’re fakes.” America ordered.

“It was a pleasure working with you, Lavender.” The spell that Arthur originally put onto him wore off and their true identities were revealed. They raised their hands high into the air.

“We did our duty.” Lavender uttered her last words she’d ever speak in this world.

A few hundred rounds were fired off within seconds filling the air with deathly gunpowder. Two less souls came out of the senate that day. The monster raged through the White House all night. It was a scene straight out of hell. Glass broke, things set ablaze, people injured, and some even parished. The only thing that most who were in earshot of the White House could hear

Y/N HOW DARE YOU!

UK I WILL KILL YOU!

Y/N IS MINE!

Then just more hellish shrieks would follow. No one really wanted to question what was going on for fear they would be caught up in the chaos. They stayed away and allowed it to happen.

*******

For the first time in a while Y/N could rest peacefully without having a horrid lucid nightmare that would only bring her down deeper into depression. She finally felt okay for a moment between England’s athletic arms. She actually got to sleep and recharge her broken soul.

“Is everything going to be alright Arthur?” Your anxieties are still nibbling at the back of your ears. It was nice that you could talk to him but you still feared that he’d leave you because you’re damaged and neurotic. A ball of untamable wild energy that no one would want to deal with.

“Y/N it’s okay. I want you to relax. I won’t leave you. I won’t harm you like America. I promise.” He kissed the back of your collarbone. You felt a million bright butterflies fly from that area and through your entire being you felt relieved and could live in the moment. You felt relaxed and safe. Nothing could ruin this for you. You melted like hot butter in Arthur’s arms. You didn’t want to think, just feel. Nothing else mattered.

Except for the brewing storm that was brewing from across the pond.

[mediocre-daydreams]

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐮𝐲 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐞𝐧: ask me any question/let's play some common tumblr games!

cym as different holidays! 💗

11 holidays for 11 mutuals!

christmas (dec 25) is @sw34terw34ther : i always see you chatting with your mutuals! you seem like the person who hosts the best holiday parties and can make their own seasonal drinks. plus with that voice of yours, i could totally see you going carolling. getting tagged in your posts is like a little christmas present.

new year's day (jan 1) is @sub-text : bro is my fucking favorite. i would clean up bottles with you on new year's day. you're so nice it makes me want to cry. i always get sentimental on new years and your writing makes me so sappy and soft bro. you write with such dedication to detail and i can't get enough of it. when i tell you my entire world reset after reading "the bet," i'm sirius serious.

valentine's day (feb 14) is @fairydxll : thanks for this ask btw! imma be honest i tried to urban dictionary what cym was but i'm hoping i got it right and it's "cast your mutuals." (UD was no help i used tumblr.) anyway, you're pink, sparkly, and precious, and you quite literally sent me a heart. i envison you as just the sweetest person ever.

johnny appleseed day (march 11) is @emmaev : i love this johnny dude. tbh no clue if he's real, but as a kid i read a book about him and it was great plus you make me just as happy as i feel when i'm apple picking. you're so insanely supportive and kind and seem down-to-earth and i think johnny would admire your thoughtfulness.

april fool's day (april 1) is @yourallihave : my tumblr wife, obviously. i appreciate you so much. your blog is bright pink and spunky, seeing your name in my notifs always makes me smile, and you have the rare ability to actually make me laugh from something i read online. not just one of those huffs or snorts, yknow?

may day (may 1) is @prettylestrange : colorful hair, colorful blog, and glowing personality. you're like the epitome of spring. i've only ever seen american may day, but it's always full of floral skirts, flower crowns, and the pole with the ribbons and stuff and if midsommar weren't a horror movie, you'd be the may queen.

national apple strudel day (june 17) is @forourmoons : (*said like timothee chalamet in don't look up*) i fucking love apple struedel just likei fucking love you. i'm your biggest fan. you're so talented and you're so interactive with everyone that it feels like you're the perfect flaky pastry crust gordon ramsey would approve of.

national bagelfest day (july 26) is @vendettaparker : if i have extra time in the morning, i'll sit down and grab a bagel before school. your writing is so indulgent and part of the reason i started writing so thank you very much i love you very much. it actually took me a long time to start liking bagels, but when i tried soft bagels for the first time dear god i ascended discovering your blog literally awakened a new jenny.

world plant milk day (aug 22) is @munsonsreputation : hear me out. i'm very passionate about soymilk, but my adoration for your blog comes close second. the way you write with such a balance of artistry, fourth-wall-defying humor, and an understanding of characters makes you as cool as plant milk imo.

dear diary day (sep 22) is @masivechaos : nobody pulls off dark academia like you do. you remind me of hand-me-down sweaters, scrapbook journals, and chocolate covered coffee beans. you're friendly and courteous and i think anyone would feel comfortable talking to you.

halloween (oct 31) is @omenhel : the whole black and white theme fits the vibe and all, but most importantly you seem like someone bold, lighthearted, and who values trying to stay true to themselves. plus you send me asks and it's like getting trick-or-treaters at my door.

(no th*nksg*v*ng on this blog boooo colonization boooo)

[autumn-foxfire]

Regarding the Best Jeanist hate: one thing I see popping up is how heroes get compared to cops a lot and I have seen things like 'of course the author is too scared to kill a cop'. This general anti-police stance that (American) Tumblr has seems to play a role here. The heroes are the establishment and therefore evil, and the lov are the underdogs fighting against abuse /s. This completely forgets that the lov are in a way abusers themselves and that they harm innocents. I don't know how Japan sees the police, but I know that at least people outside the US (and tumblr) have quite different worldviews from mainstream Tumblr (for example the police hate seems a bit over the top at times to me because I'm not American and therefore can't relate to their struggles so well, because of very different experiences with the police system). So a Japanese author not sharing the same mentality as people on Tumblr might just play into how his characters are created and intended and how they are then viewed by some.

We shouldn't press our ideals on an author from a different country or culture. So the reason heroes are still intended to be the good guys but are disregarded by a lot of fans in favor of the intended bad guys, might just be cultural bias towards one specific topic. Fans will look for any flaw they can find in heroes, even if they are blatantly untrue, just to enforce their own worldview instead of accepting that this is written by an author from a different culture and therefore there is a chance that things won't adhere to their own cultural ideals. Not to mention the language barrier, which makes unofficial translations a bad source for facts to begin with.

I hope you understood what I'm trying to say here. Have a good day :)

I know Japanese police suffer from corruption much like American police, though I think it’s more due to organized crime (the Yakuza) controlling them and a different type of corruption then what we see in America (and I’d argue that even in BNHA such corruption isn’t rampant anymore due to the fact that the manga has actually tackled the Yakuza and has portrayed them as lacking the influence they once had).

However, I find any comparison to the heroes and villains situation to what is going on with the American police system to be extremely disrespectful to the real life victims of corrupt cops. Not only is BNHA completely fictional and has no impact on society, people have been actively comparing the League of Villains, a group of murdering terrorist, to innocent black/lgbt/disabled people who have been targeted by the police in hate crimes. It is beyond insulting to do so and I can’t believe people still think it’s okay to do (the other day I saw someone actually say ahab, co-opting a phrase from protesters of actual police corruption for a fictional story).

I find it beyond infuriating how American tumblr tries to enforce it’s politics onto a Japanese series created by a Japanese author and actually claim he’s pro corrupt cop just because he’s not pandering to their views. People need to stop looking at the manga from such a biased political lense and actually read it properly for a change :/

[jayden-killer]

BLACKOUT.

Paring: Steven Grant/Marc Spector × Gender neutral reader.

A/N: OK everyone, this is my first one short ever published here, on Tumblr. I kinda stuck writing, that's why Im trying to improve my writing skills. As a reminder, English is not my first language: if you find any errors, point them out to me! <3 Enjoy!

°~°

There was something wrong with Steven Grant. Lately his behavior seemed quite out of the norm, for example: forgetting where he was, the day, the time, what he was doing, to wear such clothing. It was worrisome, and yet he didn’t seem to realize it himself. As if things were all right. Normally, you know. I couldn’t understand this nonchalance from Steven.

—It’s nothing— he always repeated, with a reassuring smile on his face, —I don’t think I’ve come out of melon. At least, not yet!—

I even talked to him about considering an appointment with a psychiatrist, a good one.

He didn’t want to know about it. He claimed that he had nothing and that it was just stress that aggravated his situation. And insomnia. That was not so much insomnia.

One episode in particular caught my attention: he claimed to have been chased by a jackal the evening after our movie night. I stared at him in disbelief, not understanding the meaning of his words.

—A jackal? In a museum?

—__, you have to believe me, but it’s true! I’m not crazy, there really was that... thing that chased me, it scared the shit outta of me!

—Steven, don’t you think you need some sleep medicine?— I said, calmly, but worried.

—No, no, this is not about insomnia, I swear on the bloody Queen of Shiba! That thing chased me and then, the next moment, I didn’t understand anything.

I rubbed my eyes. I tried to understand something about what he was telling me, but it seemed so far-fetched as to be true. More like he was telling a lucid dream or... whatever it was.

—Go home, Steven-. My hand found place on his shoulder, making small, slow movements to reassure him, accompanied by a slight smile—you’re too stressed. Is Donna also influencing these... hallucinations?

—It really happened.

—Never mind, go home and enjoy the rest you deserve.

I was right: Steven needed to pull the plug for a while. Maybe take some time off, do something new, vent through a hobby...

Maybe, for once, he listened to my advice.

But...

I didn’t hear from him for two whole days.

𖣘 𖣘 𖣘 𖣘 𖣘 𖣘 𖣘 𖣘 𖣘 𖣘 𖣘 𖣘 𖣘 𖣘

—Steven, are you home?

Nothing. I had already knocked three times at the door, alas, no answer from the other end. That he had gone into hibernation?

Shaking my head at that intrusive thought I did, I focused on the current situation.

Ah, wait a minute...

—Bingo! Unbelievable, sometimes I feel like I’ve got my head in the clouds worse than Steven— I laugh between me and me.

I was able to find the key to her apartment in my backpack. Why would I have a copy of hi original key? In short words: Steven often came to me, and I came to him, so much that we decided to copy the keys of our houses to each other. And if one left something in the other’s apartment, we wouldn’t have a problem with the key we had.

Brilliant, isn’t it?

Returning to where we were, with a forced click, the lock led the door to open. Calmly, but urgently, I took a quick look at all the rooms of his soulless home. The lights were off, things were well set up (unusual for Steven, he often leaves them where they happen), the bed well made.

So he left home?

—How about leaving the apartment, now?

As I turned around, I found myself in front of a someone who couldn't be Steven Grant. It didn’t look like him, he had something different: his hair was held back by the gel, he was wearing a leather jacket and a tight-fitting shirt underneath, as well as jeans.

His posture had also changed completely: he was way more rigid and imposing, while the accent no longer seemed typical English. In fact, hearing him right it was American.

—What are you saying? I’m here because I haven’t heard from you. Is this your way to thank me?

—I didn’t ask you to come here.

—Well, I’m here now, so suck it up.

Answering in tone was not one of the main characteristics of the man in front of me. He had literally lost everything about Steven Grant and now he was a completely new person. What the fuck was going on?

—What did you do to the accent? And the hair?—I pointed at his hair change, intrigued.

No answer.

–Okay, will you at least tell me where you’ve been these days?

Still no answer.

Nothing.

—Who you really are? Where is Steven?

—Do you always stick your nose in things that don’t concern you?

This last question made me completely out of my mind. Anger issues had never been one of my favorite traits, and controlling them was even more difficult. Clenching my fists until they turned white didn’t help. I was a volcano, which could explode at any moment: that was the right time to explode.

—Then I’m so sorry if I came to check if you were okay or not, Steven or whoever you are! Next time, however, whatever happens, don’t expect my help, because if this is your gratitude, then I won’t help you anymore! You’re happy now, huh?

But I never expected the moment I burst into tears. A hand checked that I was really crying, bringing it to my left cheek: how had I not noticed it before?

Pulling up with my nose, and wiping away the remnants of tears, I looked into Steven’s eyes and in a broken voice I said: —I will no longer be there with you in times of greatest need.

With a brisk pace I rushed out of the apartment, but Steven took the opportunity to grab my wrist and stop before I left. He whispered something indecipherable.

—What did you say?— I questioned.

—Don’t leave me too, please.

Now Steven was crying too, and he didn’t mind covering his sobs. His hand let go of my wrist and covered his face. I realized that Steven was going through a tough time, and I shouldn’t have reacted that way, but moving away wasn’t gonna solve much. I let my arms embrace him and hold him close to me, whispering words of comfort. Tempted to reassure him, and when he did, I felt a second change. His expression softened, his eyes now kinder: the Steven I knew had returned.

—Is everything all right?— I asked, worried.

—Not quite. There’s something you need to know, maybe this is the right time to do it.

—Sure— I offered a reassuring smile, —I’ll hear you.

And that’s how I learned about Steven’s condition: a Dissociative Identity Disorder, and another person living in his body. He explained who I’d been dealing with a few minutes earlier, I held his hand and made him talk. 

So, Marc was the one who pushed me away before?, I thought. Putting together the pieces of the puzzle, I knew why he was acting so strange.

—You don’t think I... don’t think we’re crazy, right, ___? - Steven asked, his eyes on the verge of filling with tears and crying again. His lip trembled, and his face resembled that of a frightened and confused child.

A smile made its way to my lips, hugging Steven (and Marc) a second time.

—No, Steven... there’s nothing wrong with you, guys. And whatever happens- I took his face gently, looked him in the eyes,—we’ll face it together. All three of us.

[plaid-shirtsandvibranium-arms]

Nemesis: Retribution (4)

Summary: 10 years after the Avengers had left you for dead during a mission gone wrong, you unexpectedly re-enter their lives. Wholly unrecognizable from the person they used to know and now with a new team behind you, they ask for your help to stop a chain of syndicates who were manufacturing and peddling the super soldier serum. You were determined to say no until the chance at the vengeance you had been chasing for years was added to the offer.

Fandoms: Avengers, Marvel, MCU, The Punisher, Daredevil

Pairings: Female Reader x (Frank Castle, Billy Russo, Matt Murdock, Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Pietro Maximoff)

Warnings: EXPLICIT SMUT. SHAMELESS SEXUAL BEHAVIOUR (18+ ONLY. I WILL BLOCK YOU), voyeurism, exhibitionism, authority kink, praise kink, spanking, slight dom themes, polyamorous relationships, reverse harem, blatant disregard for canon timelines and events, angst, Punisher canon level of violence and gore, strong language, mentions of trauma, mentions of character death, fluff if you squint, 

A/N: Slowing it down just a bit to move plot along. Freaking out on the reblogs and comments are encouraged and will be rewarded with cookies. Seriously though, I love hearing what you guys think and use some of it to make the next chapters better. I adore you all! Have at it!

No permission is granted to repost, steal, or translate my work. Not even a credit makes it okay. Tumblr is the only place I post my writing. If you see it anywhere else please report it.

Series Masterlist | Full Masterlist

1:4 Apple Crumble

Steve Rogers had kindly offered for you and your team to stay at the Compound. For however long this mission would take, you were all going to start running straight at it early tomorrow. In terms of the mission, he was relieved to have your help. The sooner the serum was out of circulation the better and they truthfully did need your help. This underground world was more your scene now and you could better navigate it.

On a personal level, he was glad that you were sticking around even if it was on a contract. He would take whatever opportunity he can and make the best of it. That's how he's always been and he wasn't going to change that now.

He told himself that it was because he was the Captain that he was at your door this late after you all had agreed to part for the night. It was out of consideration that he carried with him some of his own clothes to offer you in case you needed something to change into. It was out of a need to clear the tension with you now that you were going to work as a team again that he was knocking on your door.

That was all.

You opened the door a moment later wrapped only in a short towel and with your hair still dripping wet from the shower. The smile that rose on your face was sly as you leaned on the doorframe with your arms crossed and your hip cocked to one side. He swallowed.

Maybe that wasn't all.

"What can I do for you, Cap?"

He opened his mouth, but no words came out. He was far too distracted by the little droplet that rolled down from your temple to the valley of your breasts. He shook his head and cleared his throat, forcing himself to focus only on your eyes and not the inappropriate answers that sprung to mind at your question.

"I brought you a change of clothes in case you need it," he managed to say. "And I wanted to talk to you if you're not too tired."

You opened the door wider and took the clothes from him without a word, turning into the room toward the bathroom. You casually dropped your towel to the floor and Steve choked at the sight of your bare back, a small set of black panties the only stitch you wore. The breath in his chest released only when you disappeared into the bathroom, the door cracked open offering him enticing glimpses as you moved around.

Steve hurriedly closed the door behind him and as he made his way further in, he caught sight of an open go bag beside your bed with clothes clearly visible. There was also a shirt and sweats beside it, the design he knew belonged to Pietro. He felt a little embarrassed. Of course Pietro would have already beaten him to it and that your team always came prepared. Still there was a satisfaction that bloomed in him when you stepped out clad in his shirt, the hem barely reaching mid thigh and bare feet soundlessly crossing the carpeted floor until you came to sit with him on the sofa. You tucked your legs under you and rested your head on your hand over the back of the seat.

"Gotta say I like this look, Steve," you grinned at him.

He chuckled, self-consciously rubbing at his beard and pulling at the hair at the back of his collar. The light dusting of red on his cheeks didn't go unnoticed by you.

"What? You don't like the all American apple pie look?"

You hummed and took a leisurely look at him from head to toe. Rugged and imposing as he appeared, the heat on his face intensified at your obvious appreciation and the way you swiped your tongue along your bottom lip. You were biting your lip when your eyes met his again, trying to stop yourself from laughing at how flustered he was getting and how much you were enjoying it. You've always found Steve handsome and he made apple pie look damn good, but this look on him was just so dangerously delicious.

You had a type.

"I'm more of an apple crumble kind of girl. I like the texture better," you winked. "And I don't mind a little beard burn."

"Will your team mind that I'm talking to you without one of them here?"

You raised an eyebrow and held his unsteady gaze, clearly understanding he meant more than just your professional relationship with the three men.

"You're curious."

"It's none of my business. That's not what I came to talk to you about," he stammered, unaccustomed to how forward you were.

"What did you want to talk about then?"

"I wanted to apologize properly and thank you for agreeing to help."

You groaned and threw your whole body back on the seat, causing Steve's shirt to ride up just shy of completely flashing him. You sat back up and pinched the bridge of your nose, letting out a long breath. It was only the fact that it was Steve that you were even entertaining this conversation.

"You have nothing to apologize for, Steve," you firmly dismissed.

"I do, Nem. We all do."

"Fine. List down what you're sorry about. Let's go through it one by one or we can draw lots to make it interesting."

"Nem," he said, low and clear with warning yet imploring you to listen. "Can you take this seriously for one second?"

The ever present smirk on your face dropped as you sighed heavily and ran a hand through your hair. For the first time since he's seen you, your expression softened a fraction and a shadow of the person he used to know passed across your features.

"Listen to me, Steve. I don't blame any of you. I'm not angry at any of you. I honestly have no room for more anger even if I wanted to be."

In the beginning you were. There were days while you were getting tortured that you hated them while you pleaded to the heavens for them to rescue you. It had taken a decade and three incredible men for that inferno of fury to turn into a manageable bitterness.

"Do you know how tiring it is to be so fucking angry all the time?" you chuckled darkly. "It took a while, but I learned to prioritize what I choose to be angry about."

"Salvacion," he muttered and you nodded, your eyes staring blankly forward.

"I've carried that name for a decade, Steve. That asshole has to die by my hands."

Steve saw now how selfish he was for forcing the conversation with the purpose of earning your forgiveness. It was for easing his own guilt that he was doing it when instead he should have just been thanking you for what you did and had to endure.

"Why didn't you ever come back?"

"I tried, Steve. When I was recovered enough I tried to go back. Did you know my sister had a girlfriend?"

He shook his head, throat suddenly closing at the sight of absolute misery in your eyes. He regretted starting this conversation even more.

"Jill. She was amazing to Lily and she was like a sister to me too," you smiled a little, not in your usual sarcastic way but with a hint of gentle fondness before your expression hardened once more.

"I saw her and I just couldn't bring myself to face her. I'm the reason the love of her life is dead. I couldn't, Steve"

It started off with the fear that they might have killed Jill too. You told yourself you had to know, but truthfully you were trying desperately to find a connection to Lily. You found her visiting the graveyard, laying flowers on two stones and spending the afternoon sitting on the ground tearfully talking to the dead. The shame burned through you and from then on you made it your sole purpose to destroy the man who took Lily from you both. Until then you had no right to face her. You had no right to return to the life you once knew.

Steve noticed that you weren't crying although the look in your eyes was swimming with grief. He expected you to cry, but somehow seeing you with dry eyes only made you look more in pain. You only clenched your fists, your shoulders tense and your jaw stiff. Steve decided he would tell the others instead of having you go through this conversation again.

He would do that for you.

You woke up surprisingly refreshed the following morning, strangely lighter than you have felt in the past decade. You didn't expect for that talk with Steve to have such an impact on you. You smiled ruefully, remembering your many counseling sessions with Curtis before and that maybe you were finally seeing his point.

FRIDAY had directed you to the larger conference room for today's briefing session with the rest of the team. You were wearing another one of Steve's shirts paired with your usual cargo pants, a fact that didn't go unnoticed judging by the raised eyebrows and teasing smiles. Billy in particular was leaning in to whisper to Matt what was going on.

"You don't have to tell me. I can smell it," Matt chuckles, crinkles visible at the edges of his dark sunglasses. "His cologne is quite distinct."

You smacked Billy on the arm, but laughed with them as well before throwing a wink at Steve who proceeded to blush a deep red. As you took your seat, a cup of coffee suddenly materialized in front of you accompanied by Pietro's ever bright smile. You smiled gratefully and took a sip, eyes slightly rounding in surprise at the taste.

"You remembered how I took my coffee."

"I've forgotten nothing about you, little star."

You haven't taken your coffee that way in so long. It's been just strong plain black coffee lately, the lack of sugar and cream where you lived with the boys being a factor. It had seemed pointless to eat something sweet when there was a permanent sour taste in your mouth from life. Now though you couldn't seem to help taking one sip after another, licking your lips before going in for more.

Right now this tasted right.

You didn't notice that Billy was smiling adoringly at you and sharing a look of approval with Frank as the briefing began, happy that someone aside from him was spoiling you. You certainly didn't know that Matt was smirking because he heard your heart literally skip a beat at the sweet gesture.

It took hours for the meeting to wrap up, but there was still more to do before you could actually take action. A number of the Avengers were sent out to gather more intel while the rest would stay to make further preparations.

"I only really need to talk to Frank a bit more," Steve said as he approached your group. "Why don't we have Pietro show you guys around the Compound? There are some improvements I think you'll find interesting."

Your tour guide for the afternoon appeared beside you, taking your hand in his and bouncing on the balls of his feet in his excitement. He was just too cute that you couldn't help but let out a small smile. The effect he had on you remained it seems.

"A tour would be really helpful for me," Matt easily agreed.

"And I go wherever the pretty girl goes," Billy added, slinging his arm over your shoulders.

"Great. Surrender your weapons and you should be good to go," Steve asked with a pointed look at both you and Billy who groaned in answer.

Billy was ready with a string of complaints and counter arguments when the clang of metal on the glass conference table stunned him into silence. He watched in complete disbelief as you removed every gun and blade attached to your body, efficiently dismantling them and lining them up on the table.

"Is she?" Matt murmured, leaning closer to Billy.

"Yeah."

"All of them?"

"Yeah."

By the time you stepped back, there was practically a decent sized armory on the table. How and where you managed to fit all of it on your person was a mystery to them.

"You missed one," Billy said, snapping out of his daze.

He stepped in front of you and casually slipped his arm up the front of your shirt and under your sports bra. His fingers grazed unnecessarily close to your now hardened nipples and he simply winked when you raised an eyebrow at him. Billy pulled out two small throwing daggers soon after and placed them alongside your other weapons.

"Oh yeah. I keep forgetting about those," you chuckled.

"Do you always come armed to the teeth?" Bucky snapped, clearly bothered by the display.

"She doesn't want her team to carry extra ammo for her, Sergeant," Billy scowled at him, the obvious animosity surprising Bucky. When he turned back to Pietro, his expression was back to his usual playful one. "So how about that tour?"

Frank turned to Steve when you had exited the room. "You gotta teach me that trick, Cap."

"What trick?"

"First time in 10 years I've seen her take any kind of order without a knife fight first," he said, cracking a smile and shaking his head.

It turns out that coming back was doing some good for you and this made him more comfortable around the Avengers. He wasn't about to braid them friendship bracelets but he was less inclined to pop a cap in their ass. At least for the time being.

Walking around the Compound brought back some of that wonder you felt when you first stepped in, but it recalled everything you had lost. Sensing the sudden tension in you, Billy gripped you by the waist and pulled you into his side. He kissed your temple, a silent reminder of what you had gained.

Pietro had been an absolute sweetheart, specifically describing what was in the area for Matt's benefit and pointing out the changes to you. The training area was your last stop, the place you had spent the most time in during your short stint here. There were loud sounds coming from the area and walking in you saw fresh-faced recruits in paired off sparring sessions.

Your full attention was on Pietro as he happily listed off the new features and answered questions from Matt and Billy, the latter now in businessman mode as he thought of what he could implement for Anvil. You were having an unusually pleasant time until a familiar shrill voice demanded your attention.

"Well look what the street cat dragged in. Y/N?"

You knew that voice. A decade with torture and trauma included apparently couldn't change how much her voice grated at you. The cold smirk made a reappearance on your face as you slowly turned to face her, the three men with you were instantly alarmed at the change in your demeanor.

"Kim," you nodded.

"Thought you were dead."

"Thanks. Can't say I thought about you at all though."

"I see you're still pathetically clinging to Pietro."

"What can I say? He's really cute," you said with a wink at Pietro who seemed to enjoy the compliment.

She sneered at you, her irritation rising when you weren't backing down like you used to do. She couldn't quite put her finger on what had changed about you, but you seemed rougher around the edges and far too cocky for her liking. Luckily, she still remembered a sure-fire way to take you down a few pegs.

"I'm teaching a class on hand to hand combat. How about we show them a demonstration on what a real fight looks like?"

You giggled as your smile grew, a disturbing sight that made even Kim doubt herself for a moment. You nodded your head in easy acceptance and she looked like she was pleased at herself for getting this opportunity. Before you could step forward though, you found Matt's walking stick blocking your path.

"What? It's not assault if it's provoked," you grinned at the frown on his face.

He hated it when you found loopholes, but he relented with a heavy sigh. He was too used to this. He leaned toward Pietro and told him that he should inform the Captain.

"Get some snacks too, roadrunner," Billy chuckled, delightedly watching you strip off your shirt and walking confidently towards Kim on the sparring mats.

Pietro had returned a moment later after completing his task, actually handing Billy a bag of fresh popcorn. The smile on his face froze when he caught sight of your bare skin. So far all he had seen as evidence of your torture was what was visible on your neck and face. He had stupidly brushed that fact aside, too excited to have found you again. Now the vicious marring on your beautiful skin was a cruel reminder of their failure as your team. They had failed you.

He had failed you.

Back in the conference room, the same feelings were shared by two super soldiers. They had pulled up surveillance on the training area after Pietro's message, just in time to see you take off that shirt.

Bucky felt the air leave his lungs at the horrific sight. He was alive and you had paid a heavy price for saving him. He could barely keep his eyes on you, the shame burning through him. He didn't want to imagine the amount of pain you had to endure to sustain those injuries.

"Don't you people dare look at her with pity," Frank warned. "Those scars are a testament to her strength. She's damn beautiful."

Steve agreed. He'd caught a glimpse of your scars last night and jarring as they were, your complete lack of self consciousness to them just made you more alluring. Looking back at the screen though he was concerned that you could hurt yourself. Kim was a top agent now, high enough in the ranks to be training recruits and leading missions. She had proven herself deadly in combat, but the way you were grinning was chilling in itself.

"One question before we start," you said.

"What?" Kim scoffed, flipping her braided hair over her shoulder.

"When's your next mission?"

"2 weeks. Why?" she answered, perfect brow raised in confusion.

"Just calculating your recovery time," you shrugged. "I'm nice that way."

Kim predictably charged at you then, growling and cursing at you under her breath. You smirked, standard SHIELD movements were easy to read for you. You stayed completely still and relaxed in your stance as she lunged at you with her fist. You timed your movement precisely, sidestepping at the absolute last moment. One hand grabbed at the back of her head, forcing it down to ram against your oncoming fist with a sickening crack.

Broken nose.

Kim shrieked in pain as the blood gushed from her nose and she tried to pull away from you. You didn't let her. You pulled her down by the shoulder to bend her over before driving your knee up her midsection. She wheezed at the impact, the mat below her smattered with her blood.

Bruised ribs. Maybe slightly broken.

You unceremoniously threw her aside, letting her fall groaning on her side. You clicked your tongue, watching her struggle and turning to the class she was supposed to be teaching.

"Lesson 1, kids," you waved your hands in Kim's general direction. "Don't end up like that."

Broken ego.

You turned to go back to your boys when the glint of metal caught your eye. You tilted your head just in time for the dagger to zip past your eye line, only thinly scratching at your cheek. Your hands reacted on instinct, reaching for the small hidden pocket along the waistband of you pants. You flicked the thin blade with deft fingers, embedding on the mat and landing it purposely close to Kim's eyes that it cut through her fake lashes.

"Nem!" Steve's unmistakable voice boomed through the speakers. You had forgotten that they had FRIDAY everywhere. "We said no weapons."

You rolled your eyes and smiled cheekily at the cameras. "It's just a nail file. I don't like keeping blood under my nails."

"You call that training?" Steve groaned rubbing his eyes and turning to Frank.

"I call that anger management," Frank said, amused at how unpredictable to handle they already found you when they've barely scratched the surface. He noticed how Bucky looked furious, his metal hand clutching a little too hard onto the table. "Don't like what you see, Sarge?"

Bucky didn't answer. He didn't tell them that he didn't like what he saw because he knew he was a major contributor in what caused it. If only he had been kinder, gentler, more honest. Maybe things would have turned out differently.

He walked down the hallways much later gripping a first aid kit in his metal hand and nervously running the other through his cropped hair. The cut on your face was barely anything, but he needed an excuse to talk to you. He was afraid you would turn him away, but he was terrified that you wouldn't. He didn't know what to say to you. He didn't know how to begin to apologize for everything he's done. His palm grew sweaty and beads were beginning to form on his brow.

He was only a few steps away from your bedroom door and he was sorely tempted to turn back around when he noticed that it was cracked open and he could hear voices from inside. He should have followed his instinct to keep his distance but a high whine that definitely came from you pushed him to peak through the small opening.

What he saw made his already thumping heartbeat grow quicker. His eyes grew wide and his throat went dry. Whatever he was expecting, it definitely wasn't this.

You. Stark naked. Grinding your mound on someone's face.

You looked absolutely glorious as you wound your hips in your chase for release; head thrown, back arched, and lips in a dreamy smile. The view he had of you, facing him and deep into your pleasure, was enough to cause his pants to tighten. He couldn't see which one of your teammates was beneath you, the bedframe blocking his view. Whoever they were, Bucky was jealous. He wanted to taste you too.

He felt that stirring of longing again now as he watched you in the throes of passion with another man. He felt it the moment you stepped back into their lives. He felt it during the 10 years they thought you were dead. And he felt it when you were still in training as a recruit every time you smiled at Pietro and Steve.

You picked up your pace and he could see muscular arms reach up to grip your waist and pull you down harder. You were panting curses, your breathing turning erratic and Bucky could see your thighs begin to shake. The sight of you coming undone has to be the most entrancing thing he's ever seen.

Movement from you and your partner pulled him from the hypnosis caused by your erotic display. His face heated up, deeply embarrassed at having watched you for so long and finding enjoyment in basically violating your privacy. He was about to leave when the man whose face you had been riding, came up to kneel behind you.

He pulled your hips back against his own, sliding his hard length easily into your dripping cunt causing you to moan so deliciously that Bucky felt a shiver run down his spine. You reached your hand up to grip the back of his head, letting him bury his own in your neck as he set a languid pace with his thrusts.

Your head rolled to the side and your eyes opened, locking directly with Bucky's. You smirked and reached down to circle your swollen bud, pressing your back further against the hard body rutting behind you and purposely putting on a show. You winked at him.

He bolted out of there.

"That wasn't very nice, honey," the low voice was thick with lust in your ear. His breathing was growing labored too, finding your heat wrapping around him overwhelming.

"I don't see you stopping, Captain."

"How can I when you're gripping me so tight?" He snapped his hips earning a sharp moan from you. "Did you like that? Torturing my best pal with me balls deep inside you?"

You sighed and closed your eyes. Apple pie Steve wouldn't have whispered such sinful things to you, but this Steve could make you cum with just filthy words alone.

"Yeah, you did. Look at you clenching and soaking my cock from having Bucky watch you. You like being bad to him, honey?"

A sudden smack to your ass had you snapping your eyes open. He chuckled into your neck, biting down hard on the juncture as he felt you gripping him even tighter.

"Answer," he growled, landing a harsher smack to your bottom.

"Yes! Yes, Captain, I did."

"Good. Will you be good for me now, honey? You caused a bit of trouble today." His thrusting was still slow, making sure you felt every ridge and vein with each stroke as he drove you into a stupor. "Will you be a good girl for your Captain now?"

"Yes, Captain."

He smirked against your skin, pleased at your compliance. He was reveling in the power he had over you. Frank had said that you never took orders without a fight, but here you were being so good for him. Pliable. Yielding. He was enjoying it.

He gathered your hair in one hand and pulled, your back arching beautifully and emphasizing where his cock was buried deep inside you. With each thrust his cock came out glistening with your slick. The image made him lose control, abruptly escalating his pace to rail feverishly into you.

He had you gasping and clutching at the sheets instantly, begging for him to go harder and push you over the edge. He bent over you and reached around to rub furiously at your throbbing clit.

"Cum like a good girl, honey. Cum around my cock," he commanded. "I wanna feel you fucking drown me."

You came, lights dancing in your eyes and your head empty of all thoughts aside from the pleasure that racked your body. He followed soon after with a loud grunt, the sensation of you fluttering around him too much to resist.

He fell on top of you, spent and satisfied. Your sweat and heavy breaths mingling together as you both tried to return back to the world. You liked the heavy feel of him on top of you, strangely finding comfort in the weight.

He dragged you with him when he rolled off you, spooning you and planting kisses on the back of your shoulders that had your skin tingling from his beard.

"When are you going to put him out of his misery?"

"When it stops being fun?" you chuckled.

Steve wasn't going to push the issue. He knew that it was up to you whether you forgave Bucky or not and when that would be. It would be on your own terms how things moved. Just like what happened between you two. He wasn't expecting it, but the heated argument about the injuries you inflicted on one of his best agents had somehow escalated into him spanking you and you growing wet from it.

Not that either of you were complaining.

You turned around in his arms to face him, looking up at him with a taunting smirk. "You sure your old heart can take being in a polyamorous relationship?"

He chuckled and pecked your lips before going back in for a much deeper kiss that had you swooning. When he pulled back, he was looking at you lovingly.

"I'm known for waiting too long about things like this. I lost my shot at you 10 years ago. I'm not missing out on you again."

His words were firm and genuine. He honestly thought that he would mind having to share you with several other men. He thought that he would feel jealous and possessive. Instead, he felt reassured. He knew that wherever and whenever he lacked, someone else would pick it up and he would be the same. There was a sense of relief knowing that you would always be taken cared of by people who felt the same for you as he did.

"Well then you have some making up to do for waiting so long," you said nibbling at his lower lip.

He groaned and grabbed your thigh, hitching your leg up on his hip. Your thighs and core were still sticky and slippery from both your releases. His tongue dove into your mouth and he could feel you moan against his lips as he ran the tip of his cock against your still sensitive core. Your nails dug into his back as he sunk in, fitting perfectly inside you.

"You're running with a super soldier now, honey," he said, eyes burning with want. "I can do this all day."

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A/N: Some asked about Jill and Kim so here you go, lovelies. Come freak out with me in the comments and reblogs. Thank you all for the support! More coming soon. 

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[theepisceswriter]

AOT characters with a black S/O (Zeke, Jean, Connie, Eren, Reiner)

Synopsis: I think the title is pretty self explanatory 🙈

TW: none really besides mentions of food, African-American culture only for right now sorry my foreign babes 😕, not proofread

ZEKE

Someone throw this man a black girlfriend with a dark or regular academia aesthetic P L S because he would love you to the point where he’s obsessed and treat you so good.

Loves finding neutral shades of beige, white, or brown that compliment your skin color nicely while the two of you are out shopping. Will literally come running from across the other side of the store with a brown jacket in his hand like “Look babe, this would compliment the brown of your skin so nicely 🥺 we gotta get Instagram pictures of you in this.”

He also enjoys finding academia type hairstyles and trying to make them work with your natural hair or braids. At least once a week he sends you a hairstyle he found on Tumblr and helps you later that night to try and achieve a black version of it.

The two of you most definitely have viral pictures floating around on Twitter, Pinterest, and Instagram.

He’s so soft and patient when it comes yo your hair because he has a beard, so he knows what it feels like having to keep up with something that requires a lot of work. He’ll often come into the bathroom to do his beard and offer you an extra pair of hands when it’s your wash day. His favorite part is to help you twist your hair because he likes seeing the finished product when you take them out.

He also uses your hair conditioners and oils in his beard because they make him smell otherworldly and he likes smelling like you. And yes, he has requested for you to braid his beard once but never again because you both thought he looked too weird like that.

Grisha is the awkward white dad who tries too hard to accept you and says stuff like “Hey, like the new hairdo 😃👍🏾.” Whenever you come around. Bless his poor heart, at least he’s trying and you know he means well.

JEAN

Worships you and the ground you walk on like 24/7. He’s so in love with you and makes sure to let you know that on the daily multiple times. And he’s such an amazing lover and avoids doing cringey shit like calling you chocolate or Nubian queen goddess.

Hangs with your uncles and all the other black men in your family because he thinks he’s cool like that, but they don’t mind at all cause they love him.

His mom is the sweetest mother in law ever. She gets along so well with all the women in your family and they’re always swapping recipes with one another. One day time you and Jean pulled up for Christmas and she had a dish filled with collard greens on the table and they were good too.

He has two chains around his neck dedicated to you: one is your name and the other one is the date you two became official. You also wear his name around your neck and you have a ring with his initials on it.

Getting jewelry is something the two of you do together very often. Matter of fact, swap meets are his favorite place to go to in general and his mind was blown when you first took him to one.

Asks you to put his hair in French braids at least once a month because the process is so therapeutic for him. He loves laying his head on his lap and watching as you make his braids so neat and cute. But be careful though because he does like to “Can you braid my hair? 🥺” his way into some coochie.

Don’t brother teaching him how to braid because even if he does get the hang of it after a couple of sessions with you he’ll always request that you do his hair.

You two have random rap battles with each other alllll the time. It’s pretty split between who wins, but often you’ll call him out for trying to use lyrics from other artists.

CONNIE

Did y’all know me and Connie are blood cousins? Both his momma and daddy black and his full name on his birth certificate is Cornelius Demetrius Jones Springer, so take that as you will…

BUT REALLY, Connie fits right in with you and your culture that it’s nearly identical to dating someone the same race as you.

He has a fitted cap with your name sowed into it on the side with a cute heart right by it. It’s his go to hat and he points is out to everyone who doesn’t know about it.

Has most definitely dragged you along with him to go take one of those 2000’s-esque photoshoots with the airbrushed backgrounds. He even made the two of you dress alike and color coordinate because he’s extra like that and the photos are hanging all over your guy’s house. He carries around a mini version of his favorite picture in his wallet at all times.

You better not ever come around this man with messed up edges, visibly old braids, a too visible lace, etc because he will get on you bad and crack jokes about it the whole day because he’s a menace to society like that. No one besides him is allowed to do it though or he’ll get mad at them.

Do not ask this man to help you take down your braids unless you’re cutting them first because he will cut them crazy as hell and might even accidentally cut some of your real hair off too. He’s a master at dipping braids though, it’s something he takes pride in.

EREN

Literally a POWER COUPLE !

Eren will never have you out here looking wrong. The part on your lace is a little off? He’s telling your hairdresser to fix it! Thinks the hair you got looks too synthetic and shiny? He’s dropping big bucks to make sure you have some silky soft hair extensions.

Made you do him some baby hairs one day when he was wearing his signature ponytail as a joke, but now you’re obligated to slick up his edges for him at least once a week. He even has a silk scarf that he uses to tie them down with at night.

Is a master at finding filters on Instagram and Snapchat that don’t make your skin look Orange or pale so the two of you can have the cutest Instagram pictures together.

Walks around the house 24/7 singing 2000’s R&B songs at the top of his lungs because he’s a menace to society like that.

Supports all your financial needs when it comes to hair clothing or anything in general really. Need a new lace front? He’s wiring $700 to your account. Want a Teflar bag? He’s getting you one in every color. Some new shoes came out and you think they’re cute? He’s getting them for you !

REINER

Your aunties would L O V E a hardworking and burly man like Reiner.

He’s get so spoiled by them all the time whenever he comes around. Sometimes they pay attention to him more than they do you and best believe they slide him all the extra plates and desserts at barbecues. I just know he smacks down on a plate of soul food in like 5 minutes.

Speaking of soul food, you really lit up something in his Caucasian taste buds when you gave him a plate of soul food for the first time because now he’s OBSESSED. Every night he’s begging you to cook for him or asking you for the recipe so he can make it himself. His favorites are macaroni and cheese, fried chicken, and yams ☺️

Will bust a move on the dance floor if your family pressures him to get on it at events. He did a two-step with your aunt once at somebody’s wedding and nobody in your family has shut up about it since because they were surprised at how good he can dance. You were equally as surprised as them.

The best person to ask to help you with your hair because he’s so patient and will make sure that your parts are straight and perfect or use his hands to slick your ponytails up to the gods. He’ll do it exactly how you want it to look too and he makes sure it’s to your standard by checking in with you every now and then.

Encourages you to buy clips or little jewels whenever you take him to the beauty supply with you because he thinks you look so adorable when you wear them in your hair.

[divinerulerluvr]

Womanizer

Summary - Warren Lipka picks you up after studying to have some fun and buy time.

Warnings - basic smut with a bit of a pain kink, breeding kink, that's the main things idk what else to advise you about.

A/N - I feel we need more warren shit on tumblr since he is arguably one of Evan's best characters outside of ahs. this fic has nothing to do with the plot of American animals so no spoilers ahead.

- - -

Warren’s car comes speeding down the road, skidding to a stop where i stand on the sidewalk.The window was rolled down, letting me see his pretty face. “Hiya there, stranger,” he jokes, a smile on his lips.

Chuckling, i walk around the car and get into the passenger side. It was late at night and i had just finished studying for my exam on Monday and who better to call at two in the morning on a Friday than Warren?

The moment I had buckled my seatbelt, Warren drove off. He always drove like he was in a car chase. It scares me sometimes but we’ve never been pulled over or gotten into a crash.

His music plays loudly, only making him drive faster. He tends to get lost in the moment. “What were you studying this time?” he asks, looking over to me as he pulls up to an abandoned intersection at a stoplight.

“The uh, Stonewall Riot of 1969,” I answer, looking over to meet his eyes. My minor was in Social Justice so of course, the Stonewall Riot was a topic we’d talk about. “Cool. That chick who was like, the leader of the riots was cool,” Warren replies, driving again when the hue of the green light filled the dark car.

I just nod, looking out my window. It was late at night so not a lot of people were out on the roads. The occasional drunk person or car was all you could spot. “Where do you wanna go?” he asks me.

It was always a dreaded question. Warren knew this, that’s why he always hesitated to ask. Sometimes he’d just drive around with no destination in mind because we had nowhere to go or be. I never wanted to go home and neither did he.

“I don’t know,” I say with a heavy sigh. Warren pulls into an abandoned parking lot, screeching the car to a stop and putting it in park. He grabs something out of the cup holder and I see he holds a joint.

He lights it, inhaling it first before offering it to me. “I stopped smoking weed,” I turn down. Warren smiles, a look of playful shock in his eyes. “My god, Y/n. Repenting, I see,” he jokes, taking another hit on the joint.

“I hope you don’t think you’re better than me now,” he comments, leaning back in his seat. He turns down the music a bit, silencing ‘Piano Man’ by Billy Joel. “How's college?” Warren asks me, his eyes studying my face.

The only source of light was from the dim street lamp that Warren had parked next to. I shrug, my lips pressed together. “Fine. Stressful but I can handle it,” I answer, resting my head back on the seat.

“You look tired,” Warren notices, his eyes evaluating my face like I was some complex math equation. I chuckle weakly. “Thank you for that,”

“College is bullshit, anyway. All the famous and rich people dropped out of high school. Let alone graduated college,” Warren tries to comfort. “All you need to succeed is money and charisma. And to be honest, Y/n, you’re already halfway there,”

I turn my head to look at him, a small smile spreading on my lips. “You think I’m charismatic?” I ask. Warren nods, exhaling smoke from his joint out of his rolled-down window. “Charisma is mostly how attractive you are and the other half is being nice so, yeah,”

“That is the nicest thing I think you have ever said, Lipka,” I say, almost surprised by his compliment. He chuckles, shaking his head as he looks away from me. “The weed makes me nice,” he excuses.

“I have to agree,”

“You are very pretty though,” Warren states, his voice lowered with affection. I turn my head back to face him, seeing the forlorn look in his dark eyes as he looks at me. “You’re pretty, too,” I compliment in return, reaching out and twirling a strand of his shaggy, brown hair around my finger.

Warren places his hand on my thigh in return, his eyes heavy on mine as his thumb rubs small circles on my inner thigh. “Third hookup of the month?” Warren suggests.

“That’d be the last one and it’s only the sixteenth,” I reply. He and I had this rule that since we were friends with benefits that we got three hookups a month. It keeps order in our friend group. Warren sighs, a look of disappointment on his face. “So?”

I roll my eyes playfully, feeling his hand creep further up my thigh and closer to my core. “Fine,” I say as if I were tired of arguing but in reality, I really wanted it as well. He leans over the center console of the car, his lips locking with mine without hesitation.

Kissing back, my fingers tangle in his hair as his fingers rub my clit lightly through the fabric of my pants. I moan into the kiss, my free hand going to his dick and palming him through his jeans.

Warren pulls from the kiss first, his eyes dark with lust and his cheeks red. “Backseat,” he instructs vaguely. With a simple nod, I crawl into the backseat, already taking off my leggings and tee shirt as he joins me in the backseat.

I help him take off his shirt, running my hand up his toned torso, feeling his warm skin. He does the same to me, his hand running down my bare leg. He lays me across the seats, pulling my panties off in one clean motion before settling between my legs.

Our lips meet again, my hands on his face to deepen the kiss. The kiss was hot and desperate. Sex with him was always like this. Like he was going to die if he didn’t fuck me in the next five minutes.

Warren was a very impatient man. Which causes for hot and oh so unholy sex.

His hand travels down between our bodies, slipping under my bra and playing with my breasts. I arch my back, my moans silenced by his lips. The car was already getting hot, causing a thin sheen of sweat to break out on our skin.

My hands go to his pants out of habit, undoing the zipper to his jeans easily. Pulling them down, I pull back the waistband to his boxers to let his dick out. I feel him smile into the kiss, impressed with my eagerness. He didn’t even have to make a snide comment about it, I just knew he was thinking it.

His hands move down my body, stopping at my hips where he holds me in place so he can push into me. His lips leave him, his eyes admiring the way my mouth falls agape as I feel his dick inside of me.

My legs wrap around his waist, my nails digging into the skin of his shoulder blades as he bottoms out inside me. He pushes some hair out of my face, stalling any movements to help me adjust.

“You look so pretty with me inside of you, pup,” he says, his lips grazing over mine in a taunting way. I whimper, a shudder running through my body as he moves his hips just so slightly. “Oh, you want more?” he asks teasingly.

I nod eagerly, giving him my best puppy dog eyes to hopefully make him cave. He runs his thumb over my lower lip before pushing it into my mouth. I gladly accept it, sucking on his thumb as he pulls his hips back and thrusts into me roughly.

I screw my eyes shut, my walls clenching as Warren sets a fast and relentless pace right away. My wetness made it easy for him, as he likes to say. Any noises I made were muffled by his thumb in my mouth.

My stomach tightens in knots as pleasure floods over me. Warren pulls his thumb from my mouth, his eyes on mine as he admires his work. Tears gather in my eyes, my skin hot to touch. He caresses my cheek, his hand falling down to my neck where he drags his nails down my neck and trails down to my breasts.

A whimper falls from my lips, my hips bucking to meet his as he continues to fuck me into oblivion. “Warren,” I moan weakly, my voice dripping with submission.

A groan leaves his lips, his eyes closing briefly as he indulges in his own pleasure. “You feel so good, baby. You’re such a good girl,” he praises, his words sending more arousal through my body.

I run my fingers through his hair, our eyes locked. Warren loves to keep eye contact during sex. Says that seeing the look on my face was better than the sex itself.

Already close to my orgasm, Warren runs his hand between our bodies, his fingers locating my clit effortlessly and rubbing slow circles on it to double my pleasure. I moan out, my eyes falling shut again as I bask in the feeling.

Warren removes his hand from my clit, moving to snake under my back so he could flip me around so we were now in doggy style. He quickly resumes his thrusts, hitting deeper inside of me than prior.

I rest my hand on the fogged-up window for stability, my head thrown back. Warren’s fingers tangle in my hair, pulling a handful of it. I cry out weakly, his grip on my hair being painful. Using my hair as leverage, he leans back as he fucks me roughly.

Right on the edge of an orgasm, I hold back knowing that Warren liked to make sex last due to my three times a month rule.

Using every ounce of willpower to repress my orgasm, my walls clench around his dick tightly. “Aww, is my baby gonna cum?” Warren asks in a mocking tone, just his mere words making me want to give up my fruitless battle.

I just nod, a pathetic moan leaving my lips as his fingers dig into my hips. “Go ahead, I give you permission,” he allows. With a sigh of relief, I give up everything and let the pleasure take over. With one last cry of his name, I’m falling apart.

The only way to explain an orgasm from Warren was like being able to sit down after running for days and days on end.

My entire body shakes and I find myself relying on his grip on my hips to keep me up. Soft pants leave my lips as my ears ring, my eyes screwed closed as pressure from my veins releases itself all at once.

Warren fucks me through my orgasm, leaving me a shaky mess as he cums inside of me. Ceasing his thrusting, he carefully pulls out of me, running his finger through my soaked slit to admire his work.

Panting, I sit back down on the seat, pulling my panties back on. “Shit. I gotta get to a bathroom now,” I huff, suddenly very aware of how uncomfortable having his cum in me would be. Warren smiles charmingly, shrugging. “Everything’s closed,”

I sigh, getting back into the front seat and pull on the rest of my clothes. Warren follows behind me, pulling his shirt back on as he puts the car into drive. I lean back in my seat, still catching my breath as Warren skirts out of the dark parking lot and onto the main road.

“Just don’t tell my boyfriend, ‘kay?”

“As always, friend,”

[ttaekookss]

FIRST NIGHT [M]

Pairings- !sub Jimin x Reader

Warnings- !sub Jimin, Dom f.reader,smut, messy handjob, noona kink, a little bit of degration, cum eating ,hair pulling/tugging , begging , friends w benefits

Wordcount - 855

Author note - okay! Welcome to my first fic on tumblr (i haven’t been writing in over 3 years) . I am not native american so my english may not be the best, but i can give you 99.9% out of 100%! Enjoy yourself and if you like it- then Thank you.

It was 12: 10 am when Jimin went to bed, he mumbled something about having a mild stomach ache, but it wasn’t anything to worry about. You hummed at his words and thought nothing of it as you wished him a good night, when he left the room you continued to watch out the serie you were watching before deciding to sleep aswell. You checked the time on your phone , 1:05 am.

You turn the tv off before you walk silently towards the bedroom , you peeked inside to see a sleeping Jimin holding around a pillow. You smiled softly at him before you went to brush your teeth and change into your nightgown, you turned the lights off and moved over to the bedroom again , you gently laid down careful not to wake Jimin up. You shifted onto your side , gently running your fingers through his hair before you moved a little closer before you closed your eyes.

3:25 am, you woke up to not feeling any warmth bext to you. You sat up rubbing your eyes trying to get used to the darkness. “Jimin?” You whispered once, but there was no response which worried you a little due to him earlier mentioning the stomach ache. You were about to call out for him again untik you heard small mumbles coming from the bathroom right across you, silently waiting for anything else you slowly stepped out of bed and walked over to the door listening more carefully.

You couldn’t help, but smirk as his words were very clear to you, “Hmpf-noona.." his breath slightly ragged as he was sitting on the toilet with his hand around his shaft, slowly you open the door , watching him beg to himself. “please..” he whispered with his eyes closed, his hand were moving painfully slow as he was teasing himself just like you used to do whenever we was acting bad. “And exactly who allowed you to touch yourself without my consent?” You spoke up from the silence making Jimin startled “n-noona? I’m sorry! I wasn’t-“ you scoff and walk over to him with an angry gaze while moving his hand away from his cock.

“You wasn’t what?” You spoke again as you tugged his hair back making him whimper up at you “I’m sorry Noona-“ he mumbled and licked his dry lips, his legs spread apart even more as he were getting even more turned on by the second, you noticed that and let go of his hair only to sit down on your knees with a smirk. “is this what you wanted, baby?” You whispered as you wrapped your fingers around his shaft painfully slow with nothing to lubricate with. “P-please Noona, i can’t ..” he whimpered while looking down with flushed cheeks “i’ll be good i promise..” he promised, but you only scoffed and placed your hand below his lips , he seemed to understand as he spit in your palm the second you placed it there.

You lazily wrapped your hand around his shaft ans slowly moved it up and down, your thumb occasionally rubbing over his red and swollen tip. “Such a pathetic little brat, couldn’t even ask noona for help, always wanna do things on your own hm?” Jimin only moaned at your words while thrusting into your hand making you stop “do it again and i will let you go back to bed without any release, okay?” You sharply said before quickening your pace while looking at Jimin , pre-cum oozing out from his tip, “so dirty baby, it feels like you are already close from a little messy handjob hm?” , Jimin nodded fast at your statement “i’m so close ,Noona can i please cum?” He softly asked, but as there was no words coming from your lips he tried again.

“Please, please , please let me cum noona! I’ve been good to you! I’ll make it up for you..” he begged you as he was trembling while his cock kept twitching from how messy and lazy your movements were “yeah? You gonna make a mess for noona hm?” You smirked and licked your lips “yes, gonna cum a-all over your fingers- and i’ll even clean you up!” He desperately whined as he was struggling to hold back “come on baby, make a mess for your noona” Jimin locked eyes with you and whispered countless of thank you’s while cumming all over your hand moaning softly at the final release.

You pulled away when he had finally calmed down, soon after he looked at you with a small smile as he gently took your hand and licked it clean, whimpering softly at the taste “thank you so much noona..i’ll make it up for you tomorrow!”He promised once again before the both of you went back into the bedroom once Jimin was dressed again. “Make sure to ask me next time, or i can guarantee you that i won’t let you cum” He nodded and laid back in bed cuddled up against you. “Good night noona, and thank you..” he mumbled before drifting off again. “Good night, baby..”

[oh-hush-its-perfect]

Alex Fierro's Introduction Full Breakdown

Okokok so. This is going to go full English-professor mode, where I'm drawing conclusions that are gonna seem a little far-fetched. That's what's fun about media analysis! I can say something is a symbol, and even if I don't have enough faith in RR's competency to know if he meant for it to be a symbol, it's still true! That being said, a lot of these choices I'm sure are intentional, either at a literal or subliminal level. Page numbers are going to be used not to assert a kind of authority or whatever— this is a Tumblr post, not an essay— but to help readers find the pages I'm referencing in case they'd like to do some digging of their own. Also, this is going to be really long. Really sorry to anyone with ADHD; I might make an audiofile of this so you can get the information without having to read the whole thing. With all that, let's get into it!

To kick off, let's talk about Alex being in the form of a cheetah when she first meets Magnus. Of course, there's the obvious impact of him seeing her but only so breifly, as well as introducing the conflict between her and the rest of Hall 19. But that could have easily been accomplished by almost any animal. The choice of a cheetah being implicated implies two qualities of Alex that will be recurrent throughout the two books she's in: 1. She has a tendency to run away, as we'll later learn when she describes how she became homeless, and 2. To Magnus, she's elusive. She can't be caught or held down. The event that shows this so transparently is how Alex refuses to define their relationship at the end of the series, despite it clearly surpassing the normal bounds of friendship.

But the cheetah isn't the animal Alex is in the form of when Magnus first gets a good look at her; she's a weasel. Weasel's bring up all kinds of connotations: ferocity, slickness, a lack of charm. When we want to describe someone as an untrustworthy person, we call them a weasel. RR had Alex take this form to play up her comrades' feeling of distrust towards her. She could be a double-crosser. But paradoxically, the up-front and vicious mannerisms of a weasel also have a transperency. She does not try appealing to her Hallmate's sense of goodwill because she doesn't have anything to gain from it. So even though there is the implication that she might be an antagonist, there's also evidence from her actions and mannerisms that she isn't. The weasel's long and skinny frame also allow for a smooth transition into Alex's actual body, which is convenient.

As Alex transforms into her usual human form, Magnus describes her as "a regular human teen, long and lanky, with a swirl of dyed green hair, black at the roots, like a plug of weeds pulled out of a lawn" (pg. 50). That simile at the end is of particular interest. Let's compare it to another time Magnus describes Alex's hair, in Ship of the Dead: "Her hair had started to grow out, the black roots making her look even more imposing, like a lion with a healthy mane" (pg. 136). By contrasting these two different examples, we can see the development of Magnus and Alex's relationship. The first time he sees her, he thinks of her hair as something nasty— note the word choice "weeds." Later on, though, he becomes more affectionate towards her, more complentary. The immedient negative reaction is less his actual impression, though, and more the reaction he expected to have based on everyone else's reaction to Alex.

Her clothes are equally as interesting; as Magnus describes it, Alex wears "battered rose high-tops, skinny lime green corduroy pants, a pink-and-green argyle sweater-vest over a white tee, and another pink cashmere sweather wrapped around the waist like a kilt" (pg. 50). Aside from the obvious fact that this outfit is a) bizzare, b) fire, and c) Alex's signature colors, which add a layer of style to what can otherwise be a somewhat boring series fashion-wise (excuse me, Blitz), the outfit reveals a crucial facet of Alex's backstory in a kind of subtle way. These are expensive clothes, like the Stella McCartney dress in Alex's room. Note the mention of fabrics (corduroy, cashmere) and patterns (argyle). These indicate wealth and status. Even the high-tops; shoes like that don't come cheap. But I'd like to return to the very first word of the section: "battered." Alex's wardrobe show-cases a proximity to wealth, but also shows that that proximity has been strained and lengthened, maybe for an extended period of time. Alex dresses like a rich person, but she isn't one. Least, not anymore.

The last word of that outfit-introduction is also of interest: "kilt." At the current moment, Magnus thinks that Alex is male. No one has indicated otherwise to him. Everyone has been referring to Alex with he/him pronouns. Samirah called Alex her "brother" (pg. 29). His first thought in seeing what he at first perceives as a guy with a jacket wrapped around the waist is That looks like a kilt. This thought tells us about Magnus: despite being open and accepting, he still has some lingering notions of gender conformity from his years in wider American society.

Magnus also indicates that the outfit "reminded me of a jester's motley, or the coloration of a venomous animal warning the whole world" (pg. 50). This is rather self-explanatory, but it's still worth noting that Magnus sees the outfit as something bizzare, strange, and even perhaps comical. This places Alex at odds with the other people Magnus has met. It also reveals that Magnus has zero fashion sense. But we already knew that.

After finishing up staring at the ensemble, Magnus finally gets around to actually looking Alex in the face. First Magnus says that he "forgot how to breathe" (pg. 50), which, yeah, relatable. This is justifed by saying that Alex has the same face as Loki, but the very same sentence that asserts that that's the case also suggests an alternative reason: Alex has "the same unearthly beauty" as her father. Here we can see the beginnings of Magnus's attraction to Alex, though at this point, he still has a lot of internalized homophobia. Though there's certainly some truth in that Magnus was unnerved by Alex's resemblance to Loki, the idea that Magnus pointed out that Alex was pretty without elaborating on that thought until about a chapter later— after he was informed that Alex was presently a girl— can tell us a lot about how Magnus perceives sex and beauty.

Of course, Alex's eyes are given special attention. She has cool eyes; what can I say? But I'd like to focus in on how Magnus here depicts Alex's heterochromia as "completely unnerving" (pg. 50). Again, let's contrast this with how he describes them after getting to know Alex a little better in Ship of the Dead. In Chapter 3, Magnus describes "[Alex's] dark brown eye and his amber eye like mismatched moons cresting the horizon" (pg. 25). Once again, this shows the development of their relationship— but this time, it's in a much more personal way. Eyes are the windows to the soul; they are culturally important and biologically important in inter-personal connections. In you look into someone's eyes, you're giving them your full attention, and you're implying a kind of closeness. The way that Magnus describes Alex's eyes in the second passage is downright intimate. At this point, he is in love with Alex, and it is clear when contrasting the two descriptions.

As my last point, I'd like to discuss Alex's first words on page: "'Point that rifle somewhere else, or I will wrap it around your neck like a bow tie'" (pg. 51). First of all, Alex saying this with a "perfect white smile" (pg. 51) on his face implies that she is used to being threatened. She is not afraid of being shot; she counters the promise of an attack with a promise of her own. This pleads the question: why is Alex accustomed to violence? What events of her past or qualities of her life have brought her to this point? The threat itself reveals Alex's trauma from being genderfluid in a society with rigid gender norms, as well as her antagonistic relationship with her father. Magnus makes a comment that Alex "might actually know how to tie a bow tie, which was kind scary arcane knowledge" (pg. 51). Like Alex's wardrobe, the idea that she may have experience in high-class fashion also implies her former status as a rich kid.

I could go on. I could break apart Alex saying "'Pleased to meet you all, I guess'" (pg. 51). There is a wealth of information in this short page span that tells us things about Alex Fierro in the present moment, quietly demonstrates things about her past, and characterizes the narrator Magnus Chase. This passage is also effective in hindsight in marking the progress of Magnus and Alex's relationship.

But I'd like to take a step back and look at not the pieces, but the whole picture. Alex Fierro gets a full page of pure description— her outfit, her face— and about a chapter of introduction. This comes after several chapters of build-up. Alex Fierro is an important character you need to keep your eyes on. Alex Fierro is emotionally significant to the main character, Magnus Chase. Alex Fierro is one of the most developed and well-rounded characters that Rick Riordan has ever written— heck, she's one of the best characters in middle-grade books period. The extended emphasis on her and her alone tells us exactly what role she's going to play in this story: she's the star.

[surpriserose]

has anyone asked for a live action part 7 yet?

HELLO HI NO THEY HAVENT AND I AM FINALLY GETTING TO THIS UNDER THE CUT <3

Johnny is evan peters i casted evan as someone else at some point i know but listen hes got the perfect babyface for johnny and he cries so so much on American horror story and the tumblr girls will love him they will say he has so much gay energy despite being so so SO straight. Gyjo only has chemistry here as like...residue from canon

Gyro...can i...can i cast bo burnham as gyro like he does a lot of acting and hes a comedian and also i dont really like him and i dont think it fits at all so <3 i think gyros still italian they just dont care enough to make bo burnham do an accent...also he just kind of looks bored the whole time he cant pull off gyros jokes let alone his serious and asshole moments

Hot pants im so sorry they have to be hailee steinfeld because i hate her so much she is taking so many wlw roles despite going to hillsong it makes me soooo mad im so normal <3 so she might as well try and fail to play a nonbinary icon too <3 i was going to make gyro a woman because even Hollywood executives can't deny gyjos chemistry and have female gyros plot be about ooooh im disguising myself as a man because women are oppressed and im gonna take my helmet off and show off my beautiful blonde hair when i win for #girlpower instead of marco and stuff but then i realized theyll just do that with hot pants so they can keep the brokeback mountain jokes. Everyone talks about how progressive this is

Diego has to be whoever the hottest bri'ish guy is right now WAIT kit harrington is not the new hot bri'ish dude right now but he used to be and he was never very good at acting outside of game of thrones where he just kind of had to look miserable which was easy because it was game of thrones. He cannot be anywhere near as fun as canon diego he says puns like he wants to die and never smiles

Lucy is millie Bobby brown because like thats the only young actress i really know anymore im sorry 😭 i think she can pull it off i mean lucy is a good character and shes a good actress....but that doesnt matter they've aged lucy up to 18 so she can be johnnys love interest and thats kind of all she is because gyro isnt an option obviously our cowboys cant be gay and dinopants is canon here and rina doesnt exist :( also lucy is definitely a major damsel in distress the whole time but Shes still marketed as a strong female character

Funny valentine....im gonna be self indulgent here i really liked knives out and i want to see Daniel craig doing a terrible southern accent again <3 i dont think they direct him to do that he just does it because he wants to <3 also hes the right age range so <3 i think he would appreciate being a villain just like...wish it was any other villain king

Pocoloco is not a main character BUT he gets to be here because i was stuck by inspiration....hes played by kevin hart So they greatly expand his role even though kevin hart is just playing himself

Other notes

Everyone lives and they have an epilogue where you see johnny and lucys, hot pants and diegos, and gyro and some original character ladys kids playing in their respective lawns or something

Hot pants is probably named something like harriet now but like they have someone catcall her and call her hot pants and she stands up for herself its a real #girlpower moment

The horses are cgi since animal handlers probably have a union

There has to be a dream sequence where slow dancer and valkyrie start talking to johnny and gyro i know it and i know its got adult cartoon humor and animation...one of them is voiced by john mulaney

Johnnys disability is handled way worse than canon

Jesus is here so its not a netflix production its a pureflix production

Add your own <3

[philipkindreddickhead]

I often seen critiques of make up from an existential/philosophical perspective, but I rarely see criticism of cosmetics from a stand point of the very physical bodily harm it does. I think this is because the number of dangerous ingredients is so massive, and overlapping its an absolutely daunting task. So I've compiled the information I've found and bear with me its a lot. (This is from an American perspective. Sorry, thats what I know. However I would love it if people from other countries had things to add.)

First I want to get the "simple" stuff out of the way. I think almost everyone has heard about bacteria and fungi in makeup and that makeup causes acne from clogging pores. Makeup has a pretty strict shelf life, yet consumers are entirely supposed to self-police as Ive never seen a single expiration date on any cosmetic packaging. (I guess consumers are meant to pull this knowledge out of the ether or something. I only found out about it in a tumblr PSA. I did read that expirys are on products in Europe.) Beauty blenders are the worst offender because theyre almost always moist. When I was taught makeup I was told to wet my sponge so it would soak up less product. If you apply makeup daily your sponge is likely constantly damp. USA Today had an article which said that 96% of sponges had fungi and over 60% had E. Coli in them. But I think what people talk about less is the complication of problems from using other products in conjunction with dirty beauty blenders. USA Today warns its especially dangerous to use beauty blenders if you have damage to your skin like acne, cuts, or dry skin. However the most popular beauty products for washing your face contain walnut pieces for literally scrubbing your skin and creating microabrasions. If youre a frequent makeup user you probably know about the cyclical nature of applying foundation, breaking out, and then applying more foundation to cover the breakout. You may even be using scrubbing cleansers more frequently to combat the acne creating more tears. This can lead to "blood poisoning" and, though neither USA today or Forbes mentions this, blood poisoning (not a medical term btw. Its sepsis.) according to numerous medical sites has the potential to be extremely lethal. The symptoms are so similar to a regular flu its nearly impossible to self-diagnose.

The very first thing I was told when a friend handed me a jar of finishing powder- popular with many beauty gurus for the "baking" technique and considered a must have- was a joke about "clown lung." This was a reference to the main ingredient talc. Talc causes lung problems including cancer and respiratory illness. If anyone remembers the large Johnson and Johnson lawsuit from 2019 it was because theyd been putting talc into baby powder. Talc is dangerous because it's impossible to mine and seperate from ASBESTOS. Some high-end finishing powders will try to sell you on safe talc-free formulas but all the products I looked into contained mica instead which causes pneumoconiosis, colloquially known as "black lung disease." Like fucking coal miners get. Its not just present in finishing powder either. In my research it turned out that talc/asbestos are also present in many eyeshadows and other powder products. [Googleable, evidenced in J&J lawsuit]

Another industry to examine is nail salons. Toluene, Formaldehyde, Dibutyl Phthalate, and Methacrylate compounds are all dangerous ingredients and present in various salon products. These ingredients cause a range of problems from dizziness, drowsiness, birth defects, slow fetal growth, future intellectual disabilities in the fetus, eye skin and throat irritation, coughing, allergic reactions, asthma-like attacks, short-term memory loss, nausea, dermatitis, cancer, and misscarriage. Some nail products advertise that they are 3-free meaning that toluene, formaldehyde, and DP should be absent but often the labels are found to be completely inaccurate. It should be noted that the risk is mainly to salon workers and not patrons but ask yourself if it is right to place other people at serious risk for your aesthetic. OSHA does make an attempt to mitigate these risks however not once in my years of makeup queen did I see a salon following these directives which include constant air monitoring, half mask respirators with chemical cartridges, gloves, long sleeves, and safety glasses. (And Im not even going to touch issues of human trafficking/slave labour out of nail salons one case of which occured 5 days ago two hours away from me) It should also be noted that formaldehyde can also be found in hair relaxers and hair dyes. [Found articles in Scientific American and NYT]

I also found on the FDAs website that many cosmetics include heavy metals like arsenic, mercury, and lead. (Usually accompainied by a picture of lipstick so I assume that is the product most likely to contain it, however campaign for safe cosmetics lists foundation as containing heavy metals, and The Guardian has an article about skin lighteners from Asia and Africa containing mercury.) The website stated that the amount of these heavy metals in cosmetics is "safe" if used as intended. (and I'm going to come back to the concept of "intended use" later because thats a can of worms too) However, when searching for info on heavy metal safety I found this quote in regards to metals in food:

"Certain metals, such as arsenic, lead and mercury, have no established health benefit, and have been shown to lead to illness, impairment, and in high doses, death. Understanding the risk that harmful metals pose in our food supply is complicated by the fact that no single food source accounts for most people’s exposure to metals in foods. People’s exposure comes from many different foods containing these metals. Combining all of the foods we eat, even low levels of harmful metals from individual food sources, can sometimes add up to a level of concern"

So like, which is it? Is it a "safe amount" or is no amount of metal safe? I understand that in the case of certain foods like fish some amount of mercury poisoning is always expected but fish is also something you feed yourself and nourish your body with while cosmetics are completely unecessary to your survival. The mercury problem in fish is also mitigated by health warnings when mercury levels are particularly high but cosmetics have no such warning. Another warning on the site indicated that children should ingest NO amount of lead AT ALL because it is particularly harmful for kids yet theres no effort to stop children from using lead-containing cosmetics. I worked next to a Five Below where I was shocked to find they sold Jeffree Star and Anastasia eyeshadow dupes for five dollars which amounts to fucking pocket change for a lot of kids and kids do buy that stuff. I also think its ironic the FDA would have anything to say regarding cosmetics because in the very same article about heavy metals in cosmetics the FDA says that they DO NOT REGULATE cosmetics beyond the color additives.

Mascara, eyeliner, lipstick, and brow tint often contain carbon black. This is a color additive that is an incomplete combustion of carbon-based products. It can cause lung disease, cancer, and organ system toxicity, and eye, nose, throat irritation. The effects are mainly studied in rats and those at biggest risk are industrial workers but why do other workers have to endure lung problems for something so unecessary? [Easily googleable, NIH, CDC, WHO Europe]

This next bit I only want to mention briefly because I didnt find any particularly reputable sources about it, but its a claim that cropped up repeatedly and I think its an interesting one. Parabens, estrogen, phthalates (again), and pesticides in cosmetics are apparently linked to endocrine disorders and hormone dysregulation. Im not entirely sure what is meant by this accusation. Endocrine disorders include female diseases like PCOS and possibly endometriosis. None of these diseases is very well studied and the female endocrine system itself is not well studied either. Im not saying "cosmetics cause PCOS" because we dont know if PCOS or these other endocrine/hormonal disorders are genetic or environmental or both (it appears that PCOS is largely genetic and Endometriosis is likely autoimmune related) AND we dont appear to know for sure that cosmetic ingredients cause endocrine disorder. But I include anyway for a number of reasons:

If you happen to struggle with hormonal problems you may want to know cosmetics is a potential environment factor.

These conditions are incredibly painful. It will be a battle getting your doctor to even acknowledge that pain for diagnosis. PCOS is linked to diabetes, and heart disease. [Thanks @mother-of-pearl ] There is no cure and the treatments are often throwing hormonal birth control at it and hoping for the best.

I dont anticipate the link between cosmetics and endocrine disorders being studied any time soon or any endocrine disorders studied at all because the medical/scientific field is sexist. I dont want women to suffer in the mean time.

Now again, take this with a grain of salt because I couldnt find scientific or news sources for it. Dont fucking come for me. Im not gonna respond to you. [Most reputable source was a paper from the library of medicine at the national institutes of health but it was behind a paywall and I dont have 39 dollars to be right on tumblrdotcom]

Avoiding these ingredients is not as simple as scanning the label for them. As many beautubers and the community are no doubt aware considering multiple scandals over veganism. Products advertised as vegan or cruelty free but contain non-vegan carmine or are sold in China which legally requires the products to be animal tested. Cosmetic companies will hide ingredients claiming they are "trade secrets" or they will be placed under "fragrance." Many ingredients will be known by six or seven different names and asking consumers to be aware of seven different names for multiple ingredients requires consumers to be aware of innumerable different, often complicated ingredient names. I shouldnt have to point out that's a ridiculous burden to place on women. The EU banned 1,300 hazardous ingredients that the US did not. Cosmetic companies rely on women being unwilling/unable to bring in a list of 1,300 ingredients- with multiple names- every time they pop in to the drug store, sephora, or wherever. Buying "natural" products will not help you either. Theres no established criteria for natural/organic in costmetics, the FDA doesnt test these products, and "natural"=/= safe anyway. Plenty of plants and minerals are poisonous. One good example is traditional kohl products which advertise their natural status but also naturally contain lead and reiterating that natural powders contain mica. US courts are rarely on the side of consumers either. I found an interesting lawsuit against St. Ives for their apricot scrub taken to court for their "dermatologist tested" label despite it causing breakouts and cuts to the skin. The courts ruled that this label was fine because it only indicated that the product was TESTED not APPROVED by dermatologists. However I think any rational consumer would look at this label and assume the tests concluded it was safe for use or else why put the label on there?

[Googlable XMONDO drama, googlable laws wrt china and eu, already stated about FDA, FDA website about Kohl. Googled St. Ives lawsuit.]

I want to return to the idea of "intended use." This is sort of a fucky concept a lot of companies have ways of getting around. My "last straw" with makeup had to do with a run-in I had with Anastasia over their "Riviera" eyeshadow palette. In this pallette they had two colors that were the real feature of the palette, an electric neon purple and a radioactive pink I mean every photo, every promotion has these two colors swirled together around the eye. Because again, its an eyeshadow palette. When I buy the eyeshadow palette of course there's a little insert warning in the package that says these two shades are not intended on the eye area. In an eyeshadow palette. Contacting their customer service they told me that these two shades were meant to be used as a blush. neon purple blush. Not only that, but their website and instagram featured NO models wearing the shades as blush while EVERY model one or more of the shades as eyeshadow. When asked about this discrepancy ABH stopped responding. What I find egregious about this is the amount of people who dont know, and then more staggeringly; dont care. The sephora clerks didnt know, the in store abh representative didnt know, their customers didnt know, and when I told them they would respond with "oh, [brand] did the same thing with their [shade]." Sure enough, when I demanded that store clerks open the packaging to look for warnings nearly every product had an "eyeshadow" that was not intended for use on the eyes. Relegating dark, red-toned teal to "contour" and neon grean to "highlighter" US-based cosmetic junkies will say that these pigments have been approved for use by the EU however I found absolutely NO evidence of that. I googled it a thousand ways but all I ever found were blog posts, reddit comments, and one quote from an apparently nonEuropean layman in an Insider article. I even changed my location to France on ABH's website and the Norvina palette still contains the same warnings (not to harp on ABH in particular. I just know which shades in particular are the problem there). The Insider article noted that brands who were selling pressed pigments declined to comment. If the pressed pigments were EU friendly, I would think companies would be clamouring to say so. It also still makes their market as eyeshadow colors illegal in the US. (If any Europeans would like to chime in I'd love that.) Another problem I find with cosmetics companies and their reps is the claim that the worst thing that could happen is eye irritation for those with sensitive eyes and staining. How could they possibly know? The FDA doesnt test, or approve these cosmetics in the eye area, so ostensibly no one should be using it that way.

The next one is a bit of a "duh" but I'm going to talk about it anyway. Counterfeit cosmetics are a booming market full of untold dangers. Untold primarily because these products could contain literally anything. Ive read about glue, arsenic, lead, feces, staph, and horse urine to name a few. The labels and ingredient list on these products are fake. Legitimate brands often unintentionally play into the counterfeit market. They create artificial scarcity by making less of the product than is actually needed for consumer demand to create an even higher demand. If consumers miss out often their only chance at getting the product is to turn to counterfeits. I found examples of women who had their lips superglued, lips "turned to goo" and burned to blistering, throat closures, women with stys, contact dermatitis, eye infections. I think we as a society turn a blind eye to this problem because we think "hey, if youre buying counterfeits for a discount and you get hurt you deserve it." We imagine idiots buying products for 4 dollars from ebay or perusing Canal street for FEИTY beauty. But these counterfeits can be really convincing. I myself received a gift of a huda palette that I only recognized something was weird about it because I'd swatched it at sephora about five times earlier that month. The person who bought it for me actually paid MORE than the usual cost for the palette because it was advertised as a newer, better edition. The websites can be disturbingly similar. For instance Kylie Jenner's legitimate website is KylieCosmetics.com but you can find fakes at kyliecosmeticsshop.co.uk. These fakes can buy ad space and be one of the first sites that populate when you google the products instead of typing the legitimate site into the address bar. Counterfeits can also be bought and sold through third parties on websites like ebay, wish, and amazon. (My gift actually came from Amazon.)

[Netflix doc "Broken" ep "Makeup Mayhem" Corroborated by personal experience and google]

[autumnleaves1991-blog]

Sleepy Sex Part 2 - Javier Pena

A/N: **I’m reposting this because Tumblr put it in jail.** I was not planning on having this done tonight but the writing bug took hold and I got it done. I really hope you like it. I chose Javier. 

Thank you @peterhollandkait​ for letting me know that the link wasn’t working! You can read it now. 

Pairing: Javier Pena x F! Reader

Warning: 18 + ONLY - Oral (M & F receiving) P in V sex 

My Masterlist

Late Night

“Uhm excuse me?” you question the marine stationed at the door, “Is Agent Pena still here?”

“Who are you?” he asks annoyed, “another one of his informants?”

You roll your eyes adjusting the strap of your bag on your shoulder. “No, I’m his...roommate...he didn’t come home tonight and he’s not answering his phone at the office. I just need to know if I should open a missing person….” you trail off and he glances down at you before scoffing and opening the door.

“He’s inside his office, straight down that hall, the second door on the left.” he points you toward the embassy and you duck inside.

“Americans,” you shake your head and walk down the empty halls. It’s late and no one is around save for a few night owls. You follow the directions and stop outside the door labeled DEA Pena and Murphy knocking lightly on the door.

No one answers testing the knob and seeing that it’s unlocked you push inside. Light snores come from the couch over in the corner and you sigh upon seeing Javi safe and sound, asleep. You drop your bag by the door, and lock the door behind you. Slowly approaching him you take a rare moment to see Javi so relaxed. His lips soft and puffy, forehead clear of the usual stress lines. In this moment he truly looks at peace.

He rolls onto his side to get more comfortable and sighs, “Y/N, come to bed,” he calls softly. You stop breathing looking at his closed eyes, and checking to see if his breathing changes. “Carino,” he calls out again.

Is he....is he dreaming about you? You kick off your heels and kneel down beside the worn leather couch, running your fingers over his cheekbones and his sharp nose. “Javier,” you whisper, “Javier wake up...it’s time to come home.”

He shifts until he is flat on his back and you get an idea. You turn again and make sure the door is locked before you reach for his belt. Carefully unclasping it and sliding it through the loops, the metal clinking against each other. You unbutton the top button of his jeans and gently pull down the zipper, trying to stay quiet. His cock sits snugly inside the denim and you pull it free. Half hard in your hand you give him a hesitant stroke before checking to see if he’s awake. Seeing your clear you move closer, taking the tip past your lips and swirling your tongue around the head.

He groans and tosses a bit but still doesn’t wake up. You take him further into your mouth and brush your hair over your shoulder so you can look at his face as you take him deeper into your mouth. When he hits the back of your throat you groan as he hardens further into your mouth. You set a slow and teasing rhythm as you bob up and down on his cock hollowing out your cheeks, and running your tongue over the ridges. His hair at the top tickles your nose as you take him all the way back again before pulling him out with a pop.

Your hand reaches out to cup his balls as you run your fingers over them in a gentle rhythm. Resuming your ministrations you suck him hard into your mouth and feel his hand move into your hair grabbing tight. Your eyes shoot up to him and see Javi’s eyes finally open and staring wide mouth as you take him into your mouth.

“Fuck,” he groans, tightening his hold on your hair and pushing you down onto his throbbing cock. “I’m gonna cum carino,” he gasps before he spills down your throat. Ropes of hot creamy cum spilling onto your tongue and you swallow every drop before pulling off and opening your mouth to show him. His fingers untangle from your hair and he rubs at his eyes, a small grin on his face. “Fuck...if you wake me up like that every time I think I’m gonna marry you.”

“Who said I would have you?” you tease standing up and rubbing into the joints of your knees where they locked up.

“Come here,” he sits up and pulls down his jeans further, “I want you to sit on my cock carino,” he pats his lap and you bite your lip considering. It was one thing to give him a blowjob at his office but another thing entirely to fuck him here too.

“I don’t know Javi, why don’t we just go home?” he reaches for your hand and pulls you closer burrowing his face into the soft fabric of your dress. You run your fingers through his hair and hold him close.

“I’m not coming home tonight…” he mumbles against your stomach and your heart drops pulling him away to look up at you, “I still have so much paperwork to do.”

“Javier Pena when I came in here you were dead to the world, not working amor.”

“I know, but I had set an alarm, I just needed to close my eyes for a few minutes,” he reaches his hands under your dress and over the curve of your ass kneading gently. “Please carino,” he begs giving you that look. The look that he knows makes you weak in the knees and will give in to anything he wants.

You nod once, and he slips his fingers into the waistband of your panties and tugs them down. Putting his head under your dress, he gently parts your legs. His tongue flicks up on your clit and you grasp his shoulders to keep yourself steady as he runs a finger through your folds. “Already so wet for me,” he coos, “did sucking me off make you horny baby?”

You mumble out a yes, and gasp as he slides a finger inside you pumping slowly. His lips attached to your clit. He adds a second finger and glides it through your slick. You moan and he tells you to shh as he adds a third finger stretching you.

“You have to be quiet carino, there are still some people here,” he teases before pulling out from beneath your dress, his hand still working inside you.

“Can I cum on your cock?” you beg and he nods quickly withdrawing his fingers and pulling you toward him as he sits on the couch. You straddle his waist and hold his quivering member in your hand before you line yourself up and slide down to the hilt. He fills you deliciously and you grind yourself on him circling your hips. He kisses you fiercely and you feel the bubble burst as you flood his cock with your pleasure. He swallows your moan and raises his hips up to keep you moving, never recovering from your orgasm.

You bounce on his cock and he stops kissing you to bite at your nipples through the thin material of your dress. Lapping at the nub and soaking your dress. “I’m close carino, I need you to cum with me,” he pants against your chest.

You reach down and rub circles on your clit as he pounds into you harder. You throw your head back and bite hard on your lip to suppress your screams, as you cum again. Suddenly he cums inside you, painting your walls as he bites down hard on your breast to suppress his moans. You both breath heavy and you tilt your head down to look at him and kiss him gently. You lift yourself off his softening cock and Javi grabs your panties off the floor. “Don’t you want me to clean up first?” You hold onto his shoulders as he helps you step into them and pulls them back up into place.

“No, no carino I want you to walk around with my cum leaking out of you so you remember…”

“Remember what?” you ask breathlessly as he stands above you.

“Remember how it feels when I fuck you. That it’s only me that makes you feel that way,” he reaches towards you and caresses your cheeks. “Stay with me a little longer,” his voice drops to a whisper.

“What about your paperwork?”

He looks over at the clock on the desk. “I set that alarm to go off in thirty minutes, will you sleep with me till it goes off?” You nod already pushing him down onto the couch. He reaches for you and tugs you down on top of him. You leg over his waist and your head in the crook of his neck. He inhales deeply against the crown of your head, and places a gentle kiss before his breathing starts to even out. You place a kiss against his neck, smiling, holding tight and falling asleep, happy in the arms of Javi.

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