#amelia shepherd.

[jobrookekarev]

Not for the Faint of Heart 

Chapter: One of Three

Words: 3,042

Summary: When Jo is rushed into an emergency c-section Alex has a hard time seeing his wife in surgery and ends up on the OR floor. However, it's Jo’s life that’s at risk. 

Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy.

Relationship: Alex Karev/Jo Wilson. 

Characters:  Alex Karev, Jo Wilson, Meredith Grey, Cormac Hayes, Atticus Lincoln, Levi Schmitt, Carina DeLuca, and Amelia Shepherd.

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences.

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Fluff, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Family, Alternate Canon, Firsts, Medical Procedures, C-Section, One Shot, Happy Ending, Angst with a Happy Ending, Domestic, Parenthood, Pregnancy, Trauma.

Read at AO3

Read at FFN

…………………………………………………………………

Jo stared up at the lights in the cold OR. She took a deep breath in and smiled. The OR had always been the place where she felt most comfortable. It was the place where she had learned and grown into the surgeon that she was. Where she fell in love with her husband. In her therapy sessions, it was her safe place, where she would go when things got too intense. The OR was the place where nothing bad could happen to her. Even now, as Carina prepped her for a crash C-section, Jo was calm. But then again, she had lost a lot of blood and was on a lot of drugs.

“Are you seriously smiling right now?” Alex asked as his hand cupped her face and his thumb rubbed across her cheek, careful not to move the nasal cannula tubes. 

Alex was sitting next to her and focused completely on her. While everyone else scurried around and focused on where Carina was cutting her open. 

Jo smiled up at him, he was wearing his familiar brown scrub cap. She loved that scrub cap. “Our baby’s going to be born in an OR, I think it's kind of fitting?”

“You're scaring the shit out of me, I hope you know that,” Alex said with a nervous laugh as his eyebrows knitted together in worry, but Jo just smiled.

“Everything is going to be fine,” Jo said as she looked over at him with a smile.

Her labor had started out normally. She had felt a few contractions earlier that morning, but hadn't registered that they were anything more than a few Braxton Hicks. So she hadn't bothered to count them. As she went on with her day though, Alex insisted on keeping an absurdly close eye on her. Although he had done this throughout her pregnancy. Still, she knew he suspected she was in labor before she did. Finally, around lunch, she admitted that she might be in labor. She allowed him to pull her over to the maternity ward as a patient rather than a doctor. 

Carina quickly set her up on the monitors and things were going smoothly. Jo was handling her labor well. The contractions were pretty far apart. She just hated that she was in a hospital gown and confined to the maternity ward. Alex had vetoed any suggestions she had made on what to do while she labored except walking the halls. So they walked around a little bit and it did help. 

After a few circles around the hospital, Jo had started to feel a little light-headed and before she knew it, she collapsed in Alex's arms. She awoke back in her hospital bed with the alarms going off and several nurses around her. She had begun to bleed internally and a few minutes later, when her water broke, it all came gushing out. Carina quickly ran in and Jo was then rushed to the OR with a trail of blood behind her. 

Jo knew that she was in danger. That she could lose her life. That if Schmitt didn't get back with the blood soon, there would be dire consequences. She also knew that Carina was the best and her baby's heart rate was still good. It was her life that was on the line and she was so tired. 

“Hey, stay with me Jo,” Alex pleaded with her as her heavy eyelids closed just for a moment. “You gotta stay awake and meet our baby.”

“Just a few more minutes then they’ll be in your arms,” Carina assured her, glancing over at her before looking back to where she was cutting her open.

“I'm trying, but I’m really tired. I just wanna close my eyes for a second,” Jo complained, her eyelids fluttering again. 

She was so tired, she felt like she'd drift off if she closed her eyes. Especially as Alex squeezed her hand and rubbed his thumb over her cheek. It would be okay. She'd wake up with renewed strength and she'd get to meet her baby. 

“Have you two decided on the name yet?” Meredith asked, peeking over the divider from where she was assisting Carina.

“No,” they both replied as Jo opened her eyes to look up at Meredith.

“Didn't the two of you agree on the name Kaitlin, for Kate?” Hayes asked, his heavy accent changing the pronunciation as he looked down at her from where he was next to Meredith, ready to receive their baby. 

“I thought you said it was gonna be a boy?” Meredith asked, looking between the two of them with raised eyebrows.

“We don’t know for sure,” Alex clarified, looking over at Meredith for a second.

“It’s a boy, I know it,” Jo said, confidently as she smiled. 

“Yeah, only because you peeked at them, on the ultrasound,” Alex said, trying to be mad at her, but failing miserably. 

“I didn't, I just know,” Jo smirked as she looked up at him. 

She thought about how even now, he joked around and played with her. He refused to stay mad at her, even though he thought she had broken their rules and peaked at the baby's gender. But worry overtook his face and his eyes betrayed him as he looked down at her. She didn't want him to worry about her. She understood him worrying about the baby. She was worried too, but she didn't want him to worry about her. 

Jo would be all right. If she lived she would be fine and if she didn't well… She had lived long enough and she finally found happiness and that had been enough for her. If that's all she got in this life, it was enough.

“You're going to be… a, a good dad,” Jo whispered, the words coming out of her slowly as she used the last of her breath to speak and a few tears escaped from the corners of her eyes. 

“And you're going to be a good mom too,” Alex said, begging her to stay in his own way as he brushed the tears from her cheek with his thumb.

She thought about never watching him be a father to their child. To watch him hold them for the first time. To watch him play with them and goof around. To watch him teach them to ride a bike and help them do their homework. To watch him teach them to drive and send them off to college. To watch him give them advice as they found their way in the world. 

She didn't want to miss it, but she feared she would. She wanted to stay too. She wanted to watch her baby grow up and do all of that with them. She wanted to be a mom more than anything. She wanted to be there for them because her mom wasn't there for her. To love them because she wasn't loved. Jo loved her baby so much more than words could ever express. More than she ever thought she could love her child. 

Yet, she was so tired. She felt like if she could just close her eyes and get some rest, then everything would be okay. But she wasn't sure if she would wake up if she did. Jo fought her heavy eyelids with everything inside of her but it felt like a losing battle. She was just too tired.

“Please, please, Jo, stay with me. I need you here,” Alex said as he leaned closer as the desperation spilled over and his eyes filled with tears.

“I'm right here,” Jo whispered again, smiling up at him. She promised him she was there, taking in this moment with him. 

“Please stay,” Alex begged her, but she couldn't promise she'd stay and changed the subject.

“As soon as this is over, I'm going to take a nap for a week and you can take care of the baby,” Jo said with a smile as he chuckled. It helped relieve some of the tension and his eyes smiled as he looked down at her. 

“When we get out of here, you can nap for as long as you want and I'll take care of the baby and you, I promise,” Alex said, smiling as he looked down at her still brushing his thumb over her cheek and she knew he would keep his promise.

“I'm here, I'm here, I have the blood,” Schmitt said, running into the OR as Jo turned her head to see the blood bags. 

“Great, let's get them hung,” Meredith said immediately, moving to help Schmitt hang the bags of blood. There was a lot, but Jo knew she needed all of it. She could still feel the blood dripping between her legs and she knew she was soaking the table underneath her. 

“Dr. Karev,” Carina said, looking over at him. “Do you want to come over here and cut the cord, I’m almost ready to pull your baby out.

“Yes,” Alex said eagerly, but he looked back at Jo.

“Go watch our baby boy be born,” Jo said with a smile.

“Our baby boy or girl,” Alex reminded her with a chuckle.

“It's a boy,” Jo said for sure. 

Alex just leaned down and placed a kiss on her forehead through his mask as Jo smiled. Then he stood up and looked over to where Carina was working inside of her. Jo smiled but she watched Alex freeze as he looked over the curtain to her open belly.

“Alex?” Jo asked, staring at him as his eyes glanced over at her. Then back to her belly, then back to her face and as the color drained from his cheeks. 

“Alex?” Meredith asked as well, looking over at him. 

“Alex!” Jo said again more insistently as he just stared at her.

But he gave them no warning before he fell to the floor.

“Alex!” Jo screamed again, picking up her head to look over at him, despite how dizzy it made her feel.

The nurses ran to him as Jo watched them swarm around where Alex had fallen, although she couldn't see him on the floor. Then Meredith appeared in front of her. “It's okay Jo, we’ve got him.”

“He's all right, he's just fainted,” one of the nurses said with a shake of her head. 

Jo sighed in relief as she laid her head back down. Alex was okay.

The next thing she knew, the cries of her child filled the room. It was a loud screaming cry, but it was the best sound Jo had ever heard. Her baby was here and they were alive and screaming. Jo looked up at Carina, but she couldn't see anything except her masked face as the curtain was too high. 

“Your baby boy is here,” Carina said, excitement filling her voice as she finally held up the baby for Jo to see. 

She looked up and saw her big baby boy. He was clenching his fists and his eyes were shut as he wailed with an open mouth. His lips were full like hers and he had her round cheeks, but he was his father's son. He was huge with a chubby stomach and chubby arms that he swung around. He also had a large Karev sized head.

“He's beautiful,” Jo said with a cry as the tears streamed out of the corners of her eyes in full force, but she smiled. 

She was so unbelievably happy and all she could focus on was her baby. She watched as Carina handed him over to Hayes, who took her baby boy over to the warmer. Jo felt a sting of sadness that Alex didn't get to cut the cord as she remembered her husband.

“Is Alex okay?” Jo asked, watching Hayes look over her baby in the warmer as his strong cry still filled the room.

“He's going to be fine, Jo,” Amelia said, although she couldn't see where they were.

The room was a buzz as nurses and doctors moved around her and Carina shouted orders for medications although Jo could barely hear them as she focused on her son. She watched Hayes wrap him up in a hospital blanket and look over at her.

“Do you want to meet your son, Jo?” Hayes asked, his eyes crinkling under his mask as he smiled.

Jo eagerly nodded as he brought the baby up to her, so they were cheek to cheek. She nearly cried in relief as she got to meet her son. Someone unstrapped one of her arms and Jo held her baby boy. 

“Hi my baby,” Jo said as she turned to kiss his cheek. 

The moment Hayes brought him over, his cry had softened and after she kissed him, he fell silent. Jo knew his eyes were closed, but she couldn't see his face. Her son, she had the baby boy she knew she would. And she loved him so much. He snuggled up next to her and she kissed him again. She couldn't wait to actually hold him in her arms and look down at his face.

“Is he okay,” Jo asked, looking up at Hayes, who nodded.

“He's absolutely perfect Jo,” Hayes said with a reassuring nod. “His APGAR scores are a perfect 10.” 

“That's good, that's good,” Jo said briefly, closing her eyes again as she felt like she could rest now. Hayes kept the baby on her cheek and she relished this moment. 

“Is that him?” Alex asked as Jo looked over to see that he was getting settled in a wheelchair, his eyes still a little foggy as he stared at them. 

“It is,” Jo said with a large beaming smile. 

“What happened?” Alex asked, rubbing the back of his head.

“You fainted,” Jo said of the little laugh. “What went wrong? I saw you staring at me and then at my belly and then you just passed out.” 

Alex just took his head, unable to take his eyes off their son. He looked down at their beautiful boy as Meredith wheeled him closer so they were both together. Alex reached out to run a finger across his cheek as well. As they both stared at the little miracle of their child.

“He's perfect,” Alex said, his eyes crinkling as he stared at their baby boy and she knew he was smiling under his mask. 

“Yeah, he's perfect,” Jo agreed, looking back at their son.

Jo closed her eyes as she felt her baby boy's hand against her cheek. She relished in this little moment together. She felt her vision going dark as sleep overtook her. But she was desperate to fight it and stay with her son. He needed her. Jo quickly opened her eyes again to see someone standing over her. 

“Stay with me, Jo,” Meredith said sternly as she looked at her.

“Where's my son?” Jo asked, turning her head to look for him. 

“He's right over there,” Meredith said, pointing to where Hayes had the newborn on the warmer again.

Jo didn't even remember him leaving her cheek. She must have slipped out of consciousness. Jo felt so tired, she just wanted to fall asleep as her eyes fluttered. Still, she mustered up the strength to glance up at Meredith again. 

“Meredith.” 

“Yeah, I'm right here Jo.” 

“Meredith,” Jo said, looking up at her again. “You have to promise me that Alex won't name our son Alex Jr. or some male version of Josephine like Joe or something.” 

“AJ is a good name, though,” Alex countered and Jo smiled, but she shook her head. 

Although it made her dizzy, she heard everybody shouting around her. She looked up to see that Schmidt was hanging more bags of blood and starting to squeeze them. She was still so tired and her legs felt very wet.

“What are you talking about, Jo? You're going to be here to pick out a name with him,” Meredith said, trying to sound lighthearted, but failing.

Jo closed her eyes before opening them again. They were so heavy and all she wanted to do was sleep. But she had to do this. “Promised me.” 

“Okay, I promise,” Meredith said with a nod.

“Where's Alex? I want Alex,” Jo demanded, she didn't want to be without him right now. 

“I'm right here, Jo,” Alex said as she looked over to see him sitting on a stool across the room, although he couldn't meet her eyes as Amelia was pointing a flashlight in them to check him.

“I want Alex,” Jo said again, losing the fight to keep her eyes open as they closed.

“Jo, Jo! Alex, get over here,” Meredith shouted, as she gripped Jo's hand and gave it a squeeze. 

“Jo, I'm here, I’m right here,” Alex said, his voice pleading with her as he held her cheek.

She managed to open her eyes and smile up at him. As Alex glanced down at her, his eyes filled with tears but still he put on a smile for her. 

“Can I hold our baby again?”

“Of course,” Alex said, glancing back at Hayes.

He had heard her request and was already bringing their baby back to her. He handed the baby to Alex who held him against her cheek. 

She smiled and looked over at Alex again. “I like the name, Leo, Leonard.”

“I like that one too,” Alex said with a smile as the tears spilled over onto his cheeks. “And for a middle name, we should do Michael or Wilson for you.”

“I like Wilson,” Jo said, glancing over at her baby as he snuggled against her cheek.

“Yeah, I like it. Leonard Wilson Karev,” Alex said, rubbing a finger against Leo's cheek.

“It's kind of a mouthful,” Jo chuckled as she looked up at him.

“Yeah, it is,” Alex agreed, but he smiled too.

“I love you and tell Luna and Leo that I love them, to the moon and… and…” Jo couldn’t finish her sentence as she was too sleepy and had to close her eyes. 

“No, Jo, please, please, don't go,” Alex begged her, but she had already closed her eyes and before she knew it she had drifted off into the darkness.

[sillyfroggremlin]

watching/rewatching a show when you already have an established favorite character is great because every time they come on screen it's like

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[susseccion]

Bonus:

[potpourri-of-ecclecticism]

GREY'S ANATOMY ⦿ S20E03 "Walk on the Ocean" dir. Debbie Allen

[forbescaroline]

TOP 5/10 CHARACTERS PER SHOW (as voted by my followers) ↳ grey's anatomy edition #12. Amelia Shepherd portrayed by Caterina Scorsone

[laureala]

AMELIA AND RICHARD in Grey's Anatomy 20.03

Well sometimes I pop bubble wrap.

[tvseries-writings]

We care about you

Maya x Carina x reader (Amelia is reader’s bff)

Prompt: Reader has a car crash with Carina’s car and she feels so guilty that she refuses to go to the hospital and it’s not the best choice.

TW: car crash, seizure

When you open your eyes, your first thought does not go to the probable concussion you gave yourself, nor to the poor light pole you knocked down. No, your concern becomes the car: the Carina's very expensive and beautiful Porsche that you have just crumpled against a stupid pole that you could very well have avoided, had the road not been wet. Your thoughts are interrupted by the sound of the driver's door, yours, suddenly opening.

"Miss, miss can you hear me? Y/n?"

Vic's face appears in front of you, and as soon as he notices it's you, her gaze changes from a calm and placid one to one quite panicked.

"Are you okay? Do you want me to call Maya and Carina?"

Vic unbuckles your belt, intimating you to stay still while she checks you over. She feels your legs, asking if you can feel them. You nod. By the feel of the pain in your ribs, you probably have one or two cracked if not broken ribs, blood is pouring out of your nose since the airbag exploded in your face, and most likely the deep cut on your forehead indicates a more serious concussion than you would have liked but you don't care. The only thing you care about is the car, and right now you really have no other concerns besides.

"Were other people involved?"

"No, just a poor pole. But I don't think it will complain. We need to get you to Grey's Sloan. Montgomery, Warren! Give me a hand, we-"

"No."

Relief floods you as soon as Vic confirms that no one else besides you was involved in the accident. You know full well that it could have been worse, yet you refuse to go to the hospital, you won't let anyone waste time because of your stupid mistake. Carina's car...you destroyed it, the Italian loves that car and you literally crumpled it for her.

"Y/n, you know you have to go to the hospital. Maya and Carina would kill me if they knew I didn't take you to the hospital...please don't make me carry you or call them."

You shake your head, immediately regretting it as soon as you do when a twinge in your head makes you squint in pain.

"No, Carina is going to kill me as soon as she sees what I've done to her car..Vic, you don't understand. She loves this car more than anything, she went to pick it out with Andrew as soon as she got to Seattle-" a sob involuntarily escapes your mouth as your body is shaken as more follow. Tears line your cheeks and though you want to stop them, you really don't have the strength.

"Y/n, Carina loves you more than a stupid car...she won't care if-"

"No Vic, you don't understand, I don't want to go to the hospital, please, please, I can't look at Carina and tell her that I destroyed one of the things that reminded her of her brother. Please Vic, take me home, don't take me to Grey's Sloan. Please."

You plead with her and see her struggling internally with herself, even turning a glance over her shoulder where Ben and Travis, having heard it all, are struggling in the same dilemma as she is. Then, Vic shakes his head and you decide that you have just chosen which battle to fight, at least for the next few minutes.

"I'm sorry y/n but we need to get you checked out and Grey's Sloan is the closest. I'm really sorry."

You shake your head, tears continue copiously to line your face, and the adrenaline slowly begins to fade, making your head feel lighter and your chest feel heavier.

"No Vic, this is not your choice. I am conscious and aware of my actions, legally you have no right to transport me anywhere unless I have harmed other people."

You use your best lawyerly tone, the same tone you use in the courtroom and see them exchange a look and then nod.

"You're right, legally we can't force you but we can call Maya and Carina, y/n."

You grit your teeth; this was an option you had not calculated but, instead, you come up with an idea that is better than the others and will probably save you from going to the hospital. As they say, if Muhammad does not go to the mountain then the mountain will go to Muhammad.

....................................................................................................................

"Thank you for coming."

Amelia shakes her head, a look of disapproval quite legible on her face.

"Well, when your best friend as well as roommate for a good six years of college calls you and tells you she's been in an accident, it's hard not to check in on her."

You smile at her, and before you can try to speak, she's asking you rapid-fire questions.

"Have you lost consciousness? Have you had any dizziness? Altered vision?"

Amelia pulls a small light from the breast pocket of the lab coat she is still wearing before pointing it in your eyes.

"I'm fine," you close your eyes, instinctively turning away from that blinding light.

"Mm yeah, no. You're not all right. Now be still and stop saying you're fine."

Amelia holds your head still, probing multiple places for some kind of bump and glancing at the gash on your forehead.

"This cut needs stitches and you need a CT scan. Oh and you still haven't answered my questions, don't think I forgot."

When Vic notices that you don't answer, she does it for you.

"When we arrived she was unconscious and was unconscious for about three minutes while we were there and soon after she recovered she had trouble recognizing me so I wouldn't rule out visual changes."

Ladies and gentlemen, the traitorous bastard Victoria Hughes.

"Hospital, now. No discussion. I remind you that between the two of us, I am the doctor and also one of the best."

You sigh, shaking your head a few times or at least trying to, as Amelia holds you firmly in place.

"I don't even think about it Amelia, not-"

You stop suddenly, a high-pitched ringing in your ears not allowing you to hear whatever Amelia is saying and then, your pupils rotate back and your body is suddenly shaken by convulsions and everything goes dark.

....................................................................................................................

It is Amelia who takes you to the hospital, with Warren by your side as they check your vitals all the way to Grey's Sloan while Vic and Travis brush all speed limits in order to get their captain's girlfriend and great friend to the hospital as quickly as possible.

After administering Diazepam, fortunately the seizures have stopped and Amelia is squeezing your hand, as if to let you know she is with you.

"Everything will be fine, stay with me y/n. It's all right okay? It's all right. I'm here, I'm here with you."

In less than five minutes, your unconscious body is quickly brought through the doors of the emergency room at Grey's Sloan.

"Female, 25 years old, car accident. Unconscious for three minutes, probable head injury. She had a seizure episode before entering the ambulance; diazepam was administered. She has been stable ever since."

Vic says, before leaving you in the hands of Dr. Teddy Altman, who rolls her eyes as soon as she recognizes the woman lying on the stretcher.

"Y/n? Do Amelia, Maya, and Carina know?"

The neurosurgeon sighs, shaking her head and slipping on gloves and a sterile gown to carefully examine how severe your head injury is.

"Damn it, Schmitt, call Dr. DeLuca. Warren, alert your captain. I can't believe you guys didn't say anything, those two will kill you."

Warren swallows before nodding and pulling out his phone.

"What was I supposed to do? This idiot didn't want to and I remind you she's a lawyer, she knows her rights very well. We need to do a CT scan on her, Schmitt did you reserve the room?"

"Y-yes Dr. Shepard and Dr. DeLuca is coming. I told her that her partner had been in a car accident but I didn't have time to tell her that she was okay that she had already shut me down."

Teddy pinches her nose between her index finger and thumb, sighing in exasperation.

"Schmitt, did you even check that she wasn't operating?"

The resident looks at her embarrassed before shaking his head.

"No ma'am, I-"

The boy doesn't have time to finish the sentence that a worried Italian doctor enters the emergency room, nearly bursting through the doors.

"Where is she? Is she okay? Teddy tell me she is fine-"

The Italian woman suddenly stops, noticing only then your pale, unconscious body on the crib in front of the two doctors and the resident.

Caria quickly approaches you, stroking your forehead and being careful not to graze the cut before turning to Amelia as they move to the exam room to have you scanned. "What happened?"

Although she is addressing the neurosurgeon, her eyes do not leave your figure, and her hand does not detach from yours.

"She lost control of the car and drove into a light pole, the airbags deployed, which caused her to have a massive nosebleed, and a head injury. She had a seizure episode before we brought her in."

Carina gasps as she hears the last sentence.

"Has she woken up since then?"

"No."

The Italian closes her eyes, aware that this is not a good sign and praying that you have not suffered more damage than she initially expected.

As they prepare you for the CT scan, Amelia and Carina being the only ones in the room, Carina decides to ask Amelia one of the questions that came to her mind as soon as she noticed the neurosurgeon standing next to you, slightly sweaty in the face and aware of all the information from your journey from the accident site to the hospital.

"Why were you with her in the ambulance?"

"She called me; she was afraid you would be upset about the car and didn't even want to go to the hospital. She said she would report us if we took her, I doubt she would have done that and I would have done it anyway but you know, Vic and Warren weren't too keen on taking the risk. And then he called me so that they wouldn't take her to the hospital and they wouldn't call you or Maya."

Carina shakes her head as she and Amelia tuck you inside the machine, before exiting the room.

"You idiot, I don't care about the car. All I care about is that she's okay."

"I know Carina, I tried to reason with her and then...well, she had the fit. It will be fine Carina, she is a fighter. She will come back to you. She loves you too much to leave you."

Carina nods, chasing back tears as she looks at the monitors in front of her, waiting for the results of your CT scan.

The Italian gasps as she feels two powerful arms embrace her and hold her close.

"It will be okay love, Warren told me what happened. She will be fine, otherwise how could we give her a good telling off for how much she was considered?"

Maya kisses her wife's shoulder, also looking at the monitors despite not understanding anything written on them. They both sigh, looking at Amelia waiting for good news.

...........................................................................................

When you open your eyes, for the second time that day, you realize you've fucked up again. The cold white walls of the hospital room you are in are proof of that. You try to move your head to the side, to look around, but a twinge in your neck puts you off. You recognize Maya's warm grip in your right hand and the Italian's wavy hair caressing your stomach as the latter sleeps peacefully.

You give the fireman's hand a squeeze and a gentle caress to the Italian's face. Carina wakes up, crinkling her eyes and looking at you surprised, happy and worried at the same time.

"Bella, how are you feeling? Are you okay? I'll call Amelia..."

Carina speaks frantically, not even realizing she is speaking in Italian, and as she reaches toward the button to call the nurses, to the right of your bed, you fuss her wrist, turning a smile to her.

"I'm fine and before you call anyone else I...I have to tell you how sorry I am Carina. I'm so fucking sorry. I know how much you cared about that car and I'm so sorry, I wanted to try to fix it before you knew it...although I don't know if it can be fixed and-"

Carina hears the beeping sound getting louder and louder; she turns to the monitors and when she sees how fast you are breathing and your heart rate, she knows you are having a panic attack.

"Bella, love, it's okay. It's okay love, I'm not mad. I don't care about a stupid car, Andrea will always stay in my heart; I care about you, Bella. The car will buy back but you worth more than anything, do you understand?"

You keep breathing fast; the throbbing pain in your head does not allow you to think clearly, and unfortunately, Carina's words come to you so muffled that they have no effect on you.

The chaos around you makes Maya suddenly wake up; it takes the blond firefighter a few seconds to figure out what is going on and to join his wife in trying to drag you out of the panic attack.

The blond climbs onto the bed, sitting right behind you and holding you in her arms despite you trying with all your might to free yourself. Carina, on the other hand, kneels in front of you, taking your hands in her own.

"It's okay love, it's okay. Breathe, listen to my heartbeat" Maya whispers in your ear, leaving a kiss on your cheek.

"Follow my breath Bella; that's it, good, keep it up."

In less than ten minutes, the incessant sound that resonated in the hospital room is replaced by a soft, steady BIP. Your chest hurts and you rub it hard, to ease your pain, before a hand forces you to stop.

"Hey, hey, you're going to hurt yourself if you keep this up. Do you want me to call a nurse to give you something?"

You nod, closing your eyes and waiting for the nurse to arrive. Carina reaches out to press the button before immediately returning to hold your hands. Maya continues to leave kisses on your neck and face as you continue to keep your eyes closed.

Contrary to what you expected, it is not a nurse who enters the room but Amelia.

"Hey rock star, you're awake. What's wrong? Do you have a headache? Dizziness?"

You nod, opening your eyes and looking into her eyes. A small smile ripples your lips as your best friend walks over to your bed and hugs you.

"You had me worried idiot."

The neurosurgeon pulls away from the hug before giving you a weak punch on your right arm.

"I'm sorry."

Amelia shakes her head as she sticks something into your IV.

"This is a painkiller, not too strong but it should ease your pain. Call me if there is any problem. I'll be back later to check how your head is; I know you have a hard head but it's always best to be cautious."

Before you can even insult her for the joke she just made, Amelia sneers her way out of the room.

"What an idiot," you shake your head, rolling your eyes. Your body begins to relax as the medication kicks in.

"So will you tell us why you didn't go to the hospital right away? You know how dangerous a head injury can be and you still decided to not go to the hospital right away. It was stupid and reckless and you can't, you CANNOT do that with your health. Ever again."

Maya looks at you sternly, with her ‘’Captain's look’’, as you and Carina call it.

"I'm sorry Maya, I know you are angry and I understand why but my only thought was only the car and the fact that I had destroyed one of the things Andrew had given Carina."

Maya holds you close and Carina joins your embrace.

"No physical thing or not, none, will ever be worth as much as your life y/n. And don't ever have a seizure over it again, am I clear? A car will never be worth as much as you are to you and me, ever. I don't care if I have to throw it away, I don't care if I have to buy another one. I care about you and your health so don't ever pull that crap again because if you had the crisis while you were alone, at home, after getting dropped off there, then it could have ended really badly and I, we, need you to understand that Bella."

Carina strokes your face gently; some tears line her face and you promptly wipe them away. Maya leaves a kiss on your cheek, holding you close.

"Car is right love, you really scared us today and when I think about the fact that we could have lost you I..." Maya shakes her head, her voice breaking and you turn to her, pulling her into a kiss.

"I'm sorry Maya, I'm so sorry I...I won't do it again."

You hug and hold each other tightly, you know you fucked up but now that Carina has calmed you down the relief you feel is priceless; therefore, you enjoy the embrace and that warmth you love so much as the medication slips you back into sleep.

Thank you so much for reading! Sorry, I know it is not the best so excuse me… I will try to improve. Have a great day!

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Taglist: @mmmmokdok @blackhill2245 @melatonindaydreamz @foggytidalwavefun @sevnheaven @budoxinha @gayshyandreadytocry @lighthousekiller @m456300 @blitzar-3 @in-love-with-heda @idontknownemore @lesbianbabe @speedup500 @differentranchempathfestival @mebeingthatbitch @jemilyswife @yuleni18 @darkstar225 @whyamihere2673 @your-my-mission @finca-lotr @coollemonsaresour @nuianced-tck-enby @fishlikestuff @ktstwice @idontknowhowtogay @liladoesfanfics @maria-403 @kawaiitoga @razorscooteer

[celebadmiration]

[oneshotnewbie]

Hey, could you do an Amelia Shepherd x fem!reader where they are in the OR and one of the interns is just starring at Amelia the whole time and reader gets mad (reader is the head of cardiothoracic surgery and she and Amelia have been together for a long time now)

Authors note: I promised you, so here is a new story from me. I hope you like it & I'll try to post and write a little more from now on. I promise ♥

ᕚ---ᕘ

The fluorescent lights of the operating room cast harsh shadows on the concentrated faces of the medical team gathered around the operating table. The atmosphere was tense, the silence broken only by the quiet hum of medical equipment. Dr. Amelia Shepherd stood at the head of the table, her gaze focused on the tiny area of the brain she was trying to operate on with extreme precision. Next to her stood you, the head of cardiothoracic surgery, whose hands calmly and confidently guided the instruments to stabilize the patient's heart.

It was a highly complex operation in which every movement had to be precise to the millimeter in order to preserve the patient's life. The surgical light shone into the interior of the open chest, and despite the bright light and busy, intense activity of the situation, you noticed something unusual out of the corner of your eye.

One of the interns, a young doctor in training, who was attending the procedure didn't seem to have his attention focused on the operation, but instead stared steadily at Amelia. His looks weren't one of admiration for her surgical skills, but of something else - something you couldn't approve of.

A feeling of anger and annoyance rose within you as you noticed the inappropriate attention from him. Why couldn't he concentrate on his work and why did he have to stare at your partner like she was the only thing that mattered?

You felt your heart rate increase and you forced yourself to stay calm so as not to jeopardize the operation. But the sight of the intern looking at Amelia with obvious interest gnawed at her. Was it jealousy you felt? Or just annoyed at the lack of professionalism?

Determined to clarify the situation, you abruptly turned to the intern, your expression serious and stern. "Hey, eyes on the operation!" you snapped, your voice sharp and unmistakable. "Dr. Kwan, this is not an act, this is a vital operation. If you are unable to concentrate, please leave this operating room!"

The intern jumped as if snapped out of a daydream and quickly looked down, his cheeks reddening with embarrassment. "I'm sorry, Dr. l/n. I'll concentrate on the operation immediately," he murmured before hastily shifting his gaze from the neurosurgeon and focusing back on his tasks.

You took a deep breath, your anger slowly fading as you saw the intern focusing back on his work. But the feeling of unrest remained. As you continued to run the operation, you felt a pang of worry in your heart. Was there more to your emotional outburst - an unpleasant hint of jealousy that you couldn't ignore? Was your relationship really as strong as it seemed, or would the shadows of insecurity and jealousy tear you apart before you even had a chance to grow closer?

The situation in the operating room became increasingly complicated when Dr. Kwan continued to stare at Amelia with inappropriate looks minutes later instead of concentrating on his work. Despite your previous admonition, the young doctor seemed unable to take his eyes off the brunette, and this distraction was beginning to negatively impact the quality of the operation.

Suddenly, in the middle of an intense moment, the monitors around you started beeping wildly and a critical condition jeopardized the entire course of the operation when the intern made a mistake. The patient's vital signs spiraled out of control when an important instrument slipped from his hand, further aggravating the patient's already weakened condition.

"Damn, we're losing him! Y/n, talk to me, what happened?" Amelia shouted, desperately trying to control her position on the brain. The brunette felt the pressure in your body rising as the entire team around you reacted frantically, feeding you everything you needed to avert the impending loss of the patient. "Pericardium was injured. I'm trying to repair it."

You didn't have time to talk. You reacted quickly and precisely, your hands working to the rhythm of a well-oiled mechanism as any professional duty outweighed any personal sentiments. But despite your quick efforts, the patient's condition didn't seem to be improving. Time seemed to stand still as you found yourself in a desperate fight to save the life of the person lying on the operating table in front of you.

Minutes passed, but for you and Amelia it felt like an eternity. The exertion and stress began to take its toll, but you continued to fight, every move crucial before another unexpected complication arose, making the situation even more desperate. An artery that was directly underneath where the instrument slipped began to bleed uncontrollably, and the blood streamed into the surgical area, dangerously close to the patient's heart.

"Damned!" you scolded, pushing the intern, who was still standing at your side in shock, out of the way to give you more space. "Y/n, you can do it. Keep a calm head, you know how it works. You're the best in your field." Your partner spoke calmly and you took a deep breath before sharpening your focus, her voice and words always keeping you at bay.

You worked feverishly to control the bleeding while the neurosurgeon tried to continue the brain procedure. Time seemed to continue to stretch and distort, each second becoming an eternity as you were caught in a desperate dance between life and death.

Despite all the odds, you didn't give up. You continued to fight, your hands melding together in a choreographed dance of survival. And amidst the chaos and hustle and bustle, you finally managed to stop the bleeding and save the patient from imminent death.

But the anger towards the intern was bubbling inside you. When the immediate danger had passed and you could turn your attention back to the root cause of the operation, you turned your burning anger on the young doctor.

"What the hell are you thinking, acting like a schoolboy in love while we're here fighting for someone's life?" you shouted at Dr. Kwan, your voice filled with a mixture of anger and disappointment. "You have a responsibility to this patient and the entire medical team, and your unprofessional attitude of pandering on my wife not only endangered his life, but also the career of everyone in this room!"

The young doctor lowered his eyes in shame, his cheeks once again coloring with shame. "I'm sorry, Dr. l/n. I was careless and it won't happen again." he stammered, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Damn right it won't. For the time being, you won't be able to see the inside of an operating room anymore." You spoke, taking a deep breath, your anger slowly giving way to exhaustion as you felt the tension inside you slowly release. You turned back to the patient, your mind focused on the final task in front of you as you ordered the intern to leave the room.

In the hours that followed, Amelia and you worked tirelessly to continue to keep the patient stable and ensure he would survive the surgery. And as the first signs of success appeared and the monitors flashed gently in confirmation, you felt a moment of gratitude.

But amidst the triumph of saving someone's life also lay an uncomfortable realization - that the lines between professional duty and personal emotions could sometimes become blurred, and that life's challenges exist not only in the operating room but also in the relationships between people.

[wlw-imagines]

Behind The Curtain - Amelia Shepherd/Reader (Grey’s Anatomy)

request: Could you do a oneshot with Amelia Shepard where they both work at the hospital and are secretly dating. One day Arizona or Meredith or somebody catches them making out and then teases them about it the rest of the day. You're writing is fantastic! Thanks for reading this :) - anon

a/n: these are from my old tumblr thefandomwritings from back in 2018 ! re-vamped and re-purposed!! hope u enjoy and forgive the 2018 me style writing

Keeping your relationship with Amelia secret had been pretty easy for the two of you.

Whilst you were rarely seen venturing further than paediatrics ward, Amelia was similarly tied down to Neuro, being a neurosurgeon, and to whatever various tasks kept her occupied elsewhere in the hospital. Therefore there was never any need to cover anything up about your long-term relationship.

It had begun as a late night fling, early on in your careers at Seattle Grace - you had both finished a shift at the same time and walked into each other as you were buying a coffee.

She smiled sleepily, her eyes bleary as she gripped the coffee cup, “Y/L/N, right?”

You nodded at the correct name, and also in recognition of the woman in front of you, “Amelia.”

“Coffee? At this late hour?” She smirked, a twinkle growing in her eyes.

You couldn’t help but let out a laugh, “I could say the same for you.”

Amelia shrugged and started walking at your side, “I won’t get any sleep any time soon anway, what’s your excuse?” She raised an eyebrow as the two of your left the cafeteria.

“Same.” You shrugged, before turning back to face her and fully reigstering the look in her eyes. You took a slight risk, hoping it was the correct one, “Want to come back to mine? We can talk about how shit life is and commiserate together?”

“I’m less of a talker, more of a do-er.” She caught your expression of a raised eyebrow and shook her head, “Not like that!”

“Hey, we can do whatever you want to do.” You laughed, “I can make us more coffee at home? Stronger coffee.”

“Okay. I’d like that.”

You were fortunate really because whenever you were around one another your love was probably too obvious and your relationship was something that you felt didn't need to be known by everyone yet. So, the longer it could be kept a secret, the better. There would be no complaints of favouritism in surgery and no teasing during late night shifts, it was just straight up easier.

And while normally the distance between your areas of expertise was in your favour, sometimes, on the rare occasion, the paediatrics and brain surgery teams would collaborate. It was at time like these that it was much more difficult to keep your hands off each other.

The day had started with Arizona rushing towards you, a stressed look on her face reserved for only the worst cases. "We have a nine year old girl coming in with serious unspecified head injuries. I've paged Lady Shepherd so she is on her way up, you'll be following the case with me." She rushed out, no time to pause.

"Wait, I... Lady Sheph- Amelia is being given the case?" You asked, your heart hammering slightly once you heard the name.

"She is our in-house neurosurgeon so, yes. She is. Do you have a problem with that Y/L/N?" The woman quirked an eyebrow up at you, giving you one of her looks that you could hardly ever interpret so you just stuttered away.

"N-no, not at all. That's fine, it's great. Good for her." You stumbled through some random words that didn't even really make sense in the situation before you were interrupted by your girlfriend walking through the doors.

There was just something about her in authority and her scrubs that turned you on and that was why you were better off separated. So you found yourself relatively lucky to not be included in the team that went into surgery.

You avoided the viewing platform. But even when you were stuck outside doing paperwork you still found yourself too distracted, your mind wandering off too many times, thinking of what you would do to the woman once you were in the safety of your own apartment. 

It was going to be a long day.

You had waited until the surgery was finished until you snuck into a call room. Amelia had been walking past when you attempted to (subtly) pull her into the  room with you. You immediately closed the door and pinned her up against it, making an attempt to lock the door before Amelia flipped the tables and pushed you against the wall. The look in her eyes immediately brought back memories of how your relationship had initially begun.

"What are you smiling about?" She asked, pulling back with a confused look on her face.

Leaning forward, you kissed her nose and hummed slightly, "I love you, is all." 

The smile remained on your face as you leant slowly in. Your lips connected and the kiss only became more passionate as the pent up frustration of long, hard days and not seeing each other as much as you needed to built up. You weren't even in there to hook up like you always used to, you just need to be close and be together.(Although, shirts were beginning to be unbuttoned...)

You were vaguely aware of footsteps approaching but you were too caught up with Amelia and had just assumed they had passed. That was until you heard a small gasp coming from the doorway.

Amelia and you pulled away from each other as quickly as you could, your girlfriend stumbling back and almost falling over had it not been for you grabbing her waist and wrapping your arms around her to prevent the fall.

Once she was secure you turned your head back to whoever had interrupted with a smile that was as innocent as you could make it before clearing your throat, "Arizona... Hey."

"Well, I was not expecting this...” A small grin spread across her lips and she let out a gleeful laugh, “Actually, you know what I kind of was. Y/N's been acting strange." Arizona smiled with an evil twinkle in her eye, "I can't believe you guys haven't told me!" You quickly shushed her before pulling her into the call room and closing the door behind her. "I love you guys but at least buy me dinner first..." She joked, earning a light slap on the arm from you.

"What are you doing?" You asked, running your hand through your hair and starting to fidget.

Arizona paused, "I was going to take a nap... in the call room. Because that's what-"

Your girlfriend looked at her watch and shrugged at you, "Look at the time, I've got to go." Amelia, spoke up from the corner, sliding out the door without another word.

You went to walk after her but turned to Arizona who was still standing there with a smile on her face, "You scared my girlfriend away." You pouted.

Arizona just wrapped her arms around you and rocked you side to side, "I'm so proud of you!"

"Shut up."

"But you're both so cute."

"Shut up!" You pushed her slightly, laughing.

"And you've finally found someo-"

You gave her one last look before opening the door, "Okay, I'm leaving now!" You said, walking out.

"Love you." She yelled after your disappearing body.

"Love you too." You yelled back before adding on, "And don't you dare tell anyone!”

--------------------------------

"Y/N," You jokingly rolled your eyes when confronted with Arizona leaning on the nurse desk with a big smile on her face. You prepared yourself for the teasing that was inevitably about to come and pretended to be more interested in the paperwork in front of you. The teasing over the past week had been neverending, "Listen, I know I've been making fun of you and your girlfriend all day and I just wanted to let you know that I support you 100%. I promise that I won't let anyone know of your little secret, okay?" You visibly relaxed and looked back up at her.

You smiled, putting your hand over hers, "You know, you didn't need to tell me that. I trusted you from the beginning but thank you all the same."

She nodded and went to leave before turning back to you, "By the way, I've given your girlfriend a little gift - you may want to go up and say hi. She's in the nursery."

Confused, you frowned slightly but didn't question it as you nodded and made your way to the other side of the ward, where all the newborns are kept.

You stepped in front of the window looking into the nursery and felt your heart skip a beat to see Amelia cradling one of the babies. She caught your eye and her eyes twinkled slightly as she looked down at the baby in her arms. You sighed blissfully and stepped into the room.

"Are you terrorizing the children?" You asked, looking around at the other 3 cribs, each holding a tiny, delicate baby. You stepped closer to Amelia, putting an arm around her lower back and looking down at the baby.

"They're our kids without any home, or parents." Amelia whispered, rocking the baby slightly before shifting the pink blanket to cover her head and little waving hand that had fallen out when she was trying to reach up to your girlfriend. "I kind of thought you were just going to end the sentence at, 'they're our kids' and then you would have a lot of explaining to do."

"Surprise!" She sarcastically cheered before one last rock of the baby. Between the two of you, you managed to safely get her back into her cot and tucked up in her blanket before sneaking out the door.

You both stood in each other's embrace for a while, just soaking in each other's love and company.

"Y'know, maybe it's good that people know about us - especially Arizona." You mumble, longingly staring at the bundles left in the nursery, "if it gets us perks like getting to cuddle cute babies during work then I'm so up for coming out to everyone." You joked.

Amelia just nodded, "Me too." You looked up, slightly surprised as it hadn't really been something you had discussed yet. "Hey, you want to stay at mine and get chinese tonight?"

"Do you have the house to yourself?" You asked with surprise, since these are the only times you get to stay round and even then it is like a military mission. "No, it's a full house tonight. I'm introducing you to them."

"Babe, you realise I know your friends and they know me. We're part of the same friendship group."

"I know, but I get to introduce you as my girlfriend." She grinned and began walking back down the corridor, back to work before yelling over her shoulder, "Plus I get to show them pictures of our children!"

[upat4amwiththemoon]

amelia shepherd x fem!reader that’s an intern or resident who keeps logging in hours on neuro when they aren’t really interested in it just to see amelia. and eventually amelia noticed and asked why. i don’t really have an idea for an ending but like fluff

girls

Summary: They’re so pretty it hurts.

Pairing: Amelia Shepherd x female!reader

Warnings: my medical knowledge is zero, Scout doesn’t exist

Word count: 911

a/n: Amelia is keeping the whole show together

masterlists | guidelines

“Y/N.” Amelia smiles as she sees the woman she has gotten to know well these past months. “More neuro hours, huh? Should I feel threatened you’ll take my spot as the head of neuro one day?” She grins, holding onto the tablet with all of her patients’ information.

Y/N laughs, following Amelia as they start walking. “No way. I don’t think you should be threatened by anyone.”

“I agree.” Handing the tablet to Y/N, Amelia opens the door to a room full of MRI scan images. They stand there for a moment, watching the images. “What do you see?”

Straightening her posture, she clears her throat and stares at the pictures more closely. “Uhm…a brain tumor?”

“Are you asking me?”

“No.” Y/N shakes her head quickly, turning her gaze to Amelia. “It’s a brain tumor.”

“It is.” Amelia takes down the pictures. “What do we have to do?”

“Do a biopsy to figure out what type of tumor it is.”

Nodding, she puts the pictures aside and gestures for Y/N to follow her. They walk through the hospital hallways, all the way to the patient’s room. “Good morning, Mrs Noceda”. Amelia smiles as they settle into the room. She gives Y/N a look, giving her the moment to present the patient.

“Mrs Noceda, 53 years old, came to the hospital yesterday due to multiple complications, a MRI scan was made and a tumor was found.” Y/N lists, her eyes staying on the patient and Amelia. “Today’s agenda will be biopsy, which will tell us how to proceed.”

“Does that sound good?”

“Of course, you know best, Doctor Shepherd.” Mrs Noceda has a gentle smile on her face despite everything going on.

“Then we will get you into biopsy right away. Y/N will come and prepare you in just a moment.” Amelia takes the tablet from Y/N after they walk out of the room. “Make sure we have an OR ready soon, then prepare Mrs Noceda for the biopsy.” She writes the new information down on Mrs Noceda’s file.

“Yes, Doctor Shepherd.”

“You’ll join me on the biopsy.”

Y/N’s eyes widen momentarily, but she manages to keep herself in check. “If you wish so, Doctor Shepherd.”

“If you wish so?” With furrowed brows and a confused grin, Amelia turns her attention to Y/N. “A little more excitement would be great.”

“Sorry, I truly am very excited to be in this with you.”

She doesn’t look convinced, but there’s no time to dwell on the details. “Alright. Go get everything ready.”

“Yes, Doctor Shepherd.” With that, Y/N is off to book an OR and prepare Mrs Noceda for her biopsy.

After the biopsy, Y/N and Amelia are waiting to hear back from the lab to get the results. The latter is tapping her fingers against a table as she moves back and forth on the chair. “Y/N.”

“Yeah?” Y/N is sorting through papers. They’re cases from different branches, ortho, peds, general, cardio, and so on.

“Don’t take this as an attack,” now Y/N’s attention moves to Amelia, “why do you keep logging hours in neuro? You don’t seem too interested in it. Which I don’t get, neuro is easily the best and you’re really good at it.”

”Oh.” Y/N avoids eye contact. She didn’t think Amelia would notice her lack of interest to neuro despite the many hours she spends with the doctor. “Well…” she searches for words, though it’s clear she isn’t finding any.

“Are you here because of me?” Amelia has a playful grin on her face, which changes immediately as she notices Y/N somehow becoming even more uncomfortable. “You are?”

She lets out a breath, her cheeks puffing as she nods. “Maybe.” Her voice is a quiet mumble.

Amelia doesn’t know how to answer, not expecting this to be the actual reason for Y/N’s decision to spend time in neuro. She sits up straighter, pulling the chair closer to Y/N with her legs.

“I understand if you wish me to stop doing neuro.” Y/N says quickly.

She shakes her head. “I want you to do neuro if you enjoy it. I don’t want you to be here while wishing to log more hours into something else.” Her voice is gentle and comforting. “You are an intern, and I am in a position of power,” Y/N opens her mouth, but Amelia raises her hand to stop her, “however, I would be lying if I said I haven’t gotten…attached.”

“Really?”

“Yes.” Amelia smiles when Y/N’s whole face brightens. “Don’t get too excited. All of this, whatever it is, has to happen slowly and discreetly, preferably out of the hospital.”

“I understand.”

“And you have to start logging hours into the branches you’re actually interested in.”

Y/N’s face falls momentarily, but she smiles quickly. She knows it’s for the better, she won’t become a good doctor by pining after someone while doing something she isn’t interested in. “Okay. I’ll start logging hours on other things too.”

“Good.”

“So…” Y/N fidgets with her fingers. “Does that mean we could go on a date?”

“We’ll go on a date. After we help Mrs Noceda with her tumor.”

She giggles in excitement. “Yes, Doctor Shepherd.” Amelia rolls her eyes with a grin, patting her arm before moving her chair right next to Y/N, curious with the other cases she’s studying.

[scarlettjemily]

Being in a wlw relationship is literally just you and your girlfriend watching tv shows together, claiming every hot middle aged woman as your wife, literally prove me wrong????

[wandamaximommy22]

drinking game to play while watching greys

take a shot every time they say

1) seriously

2) fistulas

3) mcdreamy

4) mcsteamy

5) round of epi

6) time of death

7) it’s a beautiful day to save lives

8) you’re my person

i can guarantee you will be absolutely hammered within the first few minutes

[illdowhatiwantthanks]

Left Unsaid

Amelia Shepherd x fem!reader Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI, angst (happy ending!), sex, fingering, explicit language, surgery times (duh), (let me know if I missed anything!) Word count: 1.8k

Summary: You used to be Dr. Shepherd's favorite resident, but something had happened in the last month that drove you further apart than ever. Will it get resolved (hint: yes, it does)?

“You, out!”

You stood, flabbergasted, in full scrub, suctioning blood out of someone’s brain-deep head wound. The OR had gone deathly silent, and if they could’ve seen your face under your surgical mask, they would have seen you blushing bright red.

All you’d done was ask a question. All you’d wanted to know was why Dr. Shepherd had gone after the brain bleed at the angle she did, because it wasn’t the angle you’d expected. You were a surgical resident. Asking questions is what you were supposed to do.

“Dr. Shepherd, I–”

“Uh-uh. You? Out of here. You’re distracting me, Y/L/N. And if you can’t focus on saving this man’s life, you don’t need to be in here.”

Frustrated and more than a little embarrassed, you handed off the suction tube to another resident and quickly burst through the doors and into the scrub room, washing your hands furiously. You felt like crying. You didn’t know what was going on these days.

During your intern year, you’d gotten really close with Dr. Shepherd. She’d sort of take you under her wing, said you had the right mind and hands for neuro. You worked well together, almost read each other’s thoughts sometimes, it seemed. But the last month or so, she’d all but banished you from her service.

You knew part of it had to be Webber’s new initiative for “well-rounded surgeons,” a new protocol where residents were cycled between attendings at random, with no favoritism or preference allowed. But even when you were assigned to neuro, Dr. Shepherd always put you on the other neurosurgeon’s service. She hardly talked to you at all.

You wondered if you’d done something wrong, something to completely ruin the mentorship–no, the friendship–you’d felt like you were forming with Dr. Shepherd. Not only did you miss her company, miss working with her, but you missed neuro.

You spent the rest of your day on neuro doing glorified scut alongside the interns. Humiliating. And when you finally went home, you wanted nothing more than to collapse on the couch and order Chinese food. But a text from your cohort group chat reminded you that tonight was the annual Surgeons for Surgeons benefit gala. And unless you wanted to be fired, you’d have to show up, bells on, ready to mix and mingle and convince Seattle’s rich and famous to donate to the program that connected Seattle-Grace with its partner hospital in Nairobi.

You stared at yourself in the mirror before leaving. Thanks to a very artful layer of makeup, you looked a little less exhausted than you really were. And you had to admit, you looked good in a suit.

By the time you and your friends arrived at the gala, things were in full swing. Wine, music, twinkling lights, the whole shebang. You were determined to have fun with your friends, despite whatever weird stuff was going on with Dr. Shepherd. You’d had a few glasses of wine, had danced with a few other residents, and had generally avoided Dr. Shepherd, even though once or twice you’d caught her watching you. Let her feel bad, you thought. She was out of line.

But when you were on your way back from the bathroom, a hand shot out of a hallway and gently grabbed your arm.

“Jesus, Dr. Shepherd,” you complained, straightening your suit as she crossed her arms and looked at you, leaning against the hallway wall.

“Sorry,” she muttered. “You just…” She threw up her hands. “You’ve been avoiding me all night. I didn’t know how else to talk to you.”

You raised your eyebrows. “I’ve been avoiding you!?” You scoffed. “Dr. Shepherd, you haven’t talked to me in over a month. I went from being the de facto neuro resident to being bottom of the barrel in your OR. So forgive me if I’m not jumping at the opportunity to chat with you.”

Dr. Shepherd looked at the ground. “I know. I’m sorry.”

You sighed. “Look, I don’t care if we’re friends, okay? I– I would have liked it. I like you. But my career comes first. And whatever’s going on with us got in the way of that today. So whatever I did to upset you, I’m sorry. Okay? But I love neuro. And I’m good at it. You don’t have to talk to me ever, outside of work, but you cannot keep me from surgery.”

You started to walk away, but she stopped you.

“Y/N!” she called, grabbing your hand and holding it for just a moment too long. You were taken aback by her use of your first name. She always called you Dr. Y/L/N. “I don’t want that.”

“Okay…” You shrugged. “So put me back on your service.”

“No, I mean…” She exhaled sharply and stared at the ceiling. “I don’t want to be friends with you.”

You’d be lying if you said it didn’t sting. You liked Dr. Shepherd. You really liked her. You thought she’d liked you. You thought that in another life… But it didn’t matter now.

“Message received,” you said, avoiding her eyes.

“God, that’s not what I meant. I’m fucking this up.” She looked at you almost like she was in pain. As if there were words she just couldn’t get out. “What the hell,” she finally mumbled, then grabbed the sides of your face and kissed you.

To say you were surprised would be an understatement. But her lips felt so good against yours, her hands warm and soft against your skin. This was what Dr. Shepherd had wanted with you, why she’d been avoiding you. And, if you were honest with yourself, it was what you’d wanted to, you’d just been too scared to let yourself admit it.

You wrapped your arms around her waist, pressing her into the wall to deepen the kiss. She whined into your mouth, her tongue fighting for entrance, and you knew–by the arousal shooting down through your very core, the wetness pooling in your underwear–that this would not end here tonight. Amelia’s arms snaked underneath your blazer, searching for skin.

“Why do you have so many clothes on?” Amelia muttered breathlessly, painstakingly unbuttoning the collar of your dress shirt, then continuing on to the lower ones.

“Whoa!” You grabbed her wrists, pushing them away. “We’re in a public hallway, Dr. Shepherd.”

She huffed, pulling you by the arm into the closest room, which turned out to be some poor soul’s vacated office at this event venue. She slammed the door, taking her own turn to push you against a surface. It took your breath away.

“Don’t call me Dr. Shepherd when we’re about to have sex,” she said, trailing kisses down your neck.

“Fine, Amelia,” you retorted, and she smiled into a kiss. She liked a little sass in a woman.

With one hand, you rolled her nipple between your fingers. With the other, you moved slowly down her body, gently pulling up her dress to slip a hand into her underwear.

She gasped as you brushed lightly over her clit. “Fuck,” she breathed, throwing her head back. You smiled, happy to have a little power. Amelia might have all the power in the OR, but you had all the power here. You could tell by the way her hips rolled toward you, by the way she leaned heavily on the desk at her back–she wanted you bad.

She breathed heavily, squeezing your arms as she pushed her hips into you, desperate for the friction, the pressure. You grinned wickedly and removed your hand, licking her arousal off your fingers.

“Y/N!” she protested, glaring at you.

“Hmm.” You pretended to be thinking deeply, circling the rest of her vulva so that you were close, so close, to where she needed you, but not quite there. “You know what? I bet this feels a lot like being knee deep in a surgery and then being pulled for no reason at all.”

“I said I was sorry! Please, Y/N.” You had her squirming and writhing and you were getting drunk off her desperation.

You pushed two of your fingers into her warmth, already so wet, so ready for you, and she moaned. “I mean, I guess, if you insist.” You smirked at her, loving to see her lose control. She was always so in control at work. It was honestly something you admired about her. But right now? All you wanted was to see her coming apart.

There was a part of you that wanted to tell all the residents, to tell everyone that you were fucking Dr. Amelia Shepherd. But there was another part of you–deeper, softer, more you–that wanted to keep her all to yourself. Because some part of you knew that it wasn’t just sex, no matter how much easier it’d be if it was.

Amelia’s breathing grew ragged, her walls pulsing around you and you knew she was close. You circled her clit with your thumb, and she thrust her hips up into your touch, chest heaving, legs shaking. And when she finally, finally hit her peak, you scooped your arm around her back to hold her up, keeping your rhythm steady until she came down, resting her head on your shoulder, a thin sheen of sweat on her face.

“Fuck!” she breathed, lifting her head to grin at you and tuck your hair behind your hair. “Your hands.”

“That’s why I’m such a good surgeon.” You winked at her.

“That’s why you’re good at a number of things, apparently.” Amelia pulled her underwear up, straightening her dress.

“Well,” she shrugged. “Should we go back in?”

You scoffed. “I’m certainly not.”

“Why?!”

“Are you kidding me!? There’s a fucking lake in my underwear right now. I gotta go home.”

Amelia smirked, pulling you down by your collar for another kiss. You couldn’t take much more of this. You needed her. Or a vibrator. Or a dildo. Or something.

“You want help?” she asked, playing with the hair at the nape of your neck.

You blushed. The tables had turned all of a sudden, and she was the one with the power now. “Yeah,” you said quietly. “Yeah, that’d be… that’d be good.”

She laced her hand in yours, squeezing it. “Take me home, Dr. Y/L/N.”

“What if someone sees us!?” you hissed, looking both ways out the office door.

“We’ll slip out the back.”

“Sneaky.” You nodded. “I like this side of you.”

Glancing furtively around, she leaned forward and sunk her teeth into your neck, taking you by surprise. You gasped.

She pressed her lips against your ear. “I’ve got a lot of sides you haven’t seen yet.”

God, you couldn’t wait to see them.

[girlkisser13]

for the first time

"it's just like seeing her" "for the first time" "again"

pairings: amelia shepherd x fem!reader

warnings/tags: angst with a hint of fluff at the end. mentions of amelia having a relapse.

summary: you reunite with amelia after she comes back from rehab.

the corridors of grey sloan memorial hospital held a familiarity that felt like home. the steady rhythm of beeping monitors, hurried footsteps, and murmured conversations had been the soundtrack to your life for years. it was comforting, yet today, as you walked through the halls, there was an undercurrent of unease you couldn’t quite shake. maybe it was the fact that you hadn’t been back in seattle for a while, or perhaps it was the uneasiness that always seemed to follow you since things fell apart with amelia.

mark had paged you for a consult. another reconstructive case that needed your expertise. you were good at this— rebuilding, putting things back together. it was what you did best, even if you couldn’t always apply the same skill to your own life.

you turned a corner sharply, your mind preoccupied with the upcoming surgery, and collided with someone. papers flew into the air like a cascade of autumn leaves, and you stumbled back, reaching out to steady the person you’d bumped into.

"i’m so sorry! i didn’t see you," you apologized, dropping to your knees to gather the scattered documents.

"no, it’s okay, i wasn’t looking where i was going either," a familiar voice replied.

you froze, your hand hovering over a paper as the recognition hit you like a tidal wave. you slowly looked up, heart hammering in your chest, and found yourself staring into the eyes of amelia shepherd.

"hi," she said softly, her voice carrying a hint of surprise mixed with something else— something you couldn’t quite place.

"hi," you echoed, your voice barely more than a whisper.

the hospital faded away, the bustle of nurses and doctors becoming a distant murmur as you stood there, looking at each other. she looked almost exactly the same as the last time you’d seen her. her hair was shorter, yes, but her eyes still held that familiar spark of determination and defiance. there was a vulnerability in her gaze, though, that hadn’t been there before.

for a moment, you were both back at johns hopkins, two young residents studying late into the night, navigating the grueling demands of your profession while also navigating the complexities of your relationship. she’d been your world back then, the anchor that kept you grounded when everything else felt like it was spinning out of control.

"amelia…" you began, but before you could find the right words, your pager buzzed, breaking the moment. you glanced down, seeing mark’s name flashing on the small screen. "i—i have to go," you stammered, taking a step back. "mark’s paging me."

"yeah, of course," she replied quickly, masking the disappointment that flashed across her face. "i’ll see you around?"

you nodded, still trying to process the fact that she was standing in front of you. "yeah, sure."

as you walked away, you couldn’t help but look back. amelia was still standing there, watching you go, a wistful expression on her face. a wave of emotions threatened to overwhelm you, but you pushed them down, focusing on the task at hand. mark needed you, and that’s where your focus had to be.

mark was waiting for you in the attending lounge, leaning casually against the counter, his arms crossed over his chest. he looked up when you entered, a knowing smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

"what took you so long?" he asked, his tone teasing.

"i, uh, got held up," you replied vaguely, trying to shake off the encounter with amelia. "what did you want my opinion on?"

mark handed you a patient file, but his eyes stayed on your face, studying you intently. "i was looking at a complicated reconstruction case. thought you might have some ideas. but, you know, since you’ve been avoiding seattle like the plague, i haven’t been able to ask for your expertise in a while."

you knew he was baiting you, and you weren’t in the mood. "i’ve been busy, mark. you know that."

"sure," he said with a shrug, his expression still smug. "by the way, did you know amelia’s here?"

the file slipped from your hands, falling to the floor. you bent to pick it up, trying to hide the sudden rush of emotions his words caused. "yeah," you said, your voice more steady than you felt. "i ran into her in the hall."

mark’s eyes gleamed with amusement. "and? how was that?"

you shot him a glare. "she said hi. i said hi back. then you paged me."

"really?" he said, his voice laced with disbelief. "because she looked like she wanted to say more than just hi."

"do you know why she’s here?" you asked, changing the subject.

"nope," he said, shaking his head. "but she did say she was looking for you."

you felt your heart skip a beat. "looking for me? why?"

before mark could answer, a voice cut through the room. "mark." both of you turned to see amelia standing in the doorway, looking hesitant. "can i talk to you for a minute?"

mark straightened up, glancing at you before nodding at amelia. "sure, come on in."

you felt trapped, the walls of the small lounge closing in on you. "i should go prep for my surgery," you mumbled, quickly walking past amelia without meeting her eyes. as you left the room, you heard mark and amelia start talking, their voices fading as you made your way down the corridor. your mind was a storm of thoughts and memories, each one bringing with it a wave of emotion you weren’t prepared to face.

later that afternoon, you were in the lounge again, trying to focus on a patient’s chart when amelia found you. she entered quietly, her presence like a ghost in the room. you didn’t look up, your attention fixed on the papers in front of you.

"can we talk?" she asked softly, breaking the silence.

you took a deep breath before raising your eyes to meet hers. "what are you doing here, amelia?" you asked, trying to keep your voice neutral.

"i wanted to see you," she said simply.

you felt a flicker of frustration. "you flew three hours just because you wanted to see me?"

"yes," she replied, her voice unwavering.

silence filled the room, heavy and suffocating. you felt her eyes on you, searching, but you couldn’t bring yourself to meet her gaze. she took a step closer, and you saw her pull something from her bag. it was an envelope— the letter you had sent her when she was in rehab.

"i read your letter," she said, holding it out like it was a fragile piece of glass. "i’m sober now. i’ve been through rehab, therapy… i’ve done the work. but you weren’t there."

her words stung, and you finally looked up, meeting her gaze. the sincerity in her eyes was unmistakable. she looked like the same woman you’d fallen in love with all those years ago, and yet there was something different about her now— an openness, a vulnerability that hadn’t been there before.

"you don’t get to use my letter against me, amelia," you said, your voice tinged with anger. "not after everything you said to me."

her eyes filled with tears, and she took another step closer. you instinctively took a step back, the distance between you growing. the hurt in her eyes was palpable, and it mirrored the pain you’d carried for so long.

"i know i hurt you," she said, her voice breaking. "i didn’t mean those things. it was the drugs talking. i was scared and angry and broken. i wish i could take it all back."

you felt a lump in your throat, memories of those final days flooding back. the way she had looked at you with nothing but disdain, the harsh words that had cut deeper than any scalpel ever could. you had known she was spiraling, but you hadn’t known how to help. and then she had pushed you away, saying things that still haunted you.

"i know you didn’t mean them," you said quietly. "but that doesn’t make them hurt any less."

"i’m sorry," she whispered, tears spilling down her cheeks. "i’d do anything to take it all back, to make it right. i’m here now. and i’m sober. i came back to you. please, come back to me too."

loving amelia had always been complicated, a tangle of emotions you could never quite unravel. but standing here now, seeing the vulnerability in her eyes and hearing the sincerity in her apology, you felt something shift inside you. her presence brought back a flood of memories— late nights studying at johns hopkins, quiet moments stolen between surgeries, laughter shared over dinner.

but there was more than just nostalgia. there was pain. deep, lingering pain from the harsh words she'd said during her relapse. words that had cut deeper than any scalpel ever could. words you weren’t sure you could forget.

"amelia," you began, your voice uncertain. "i don’t know if i can do this again."

she looked at you, her eyes filled with emotion. "do you still love me?" she asked softly.

the question hit you like a freight train. did you? it felt like loving her was an inherent part of who you were, woven into your very being. but could you survive loving her again? you opened your mouth to speak, but no words came out. instead, you stood there, silent.

amelia’s face fell, but she didn’t back away. instead, she took a tentative step closer. "because i still love you," she said, her voice trembling. "i’m still so in love with you. i don’t think i’ve ever… stopped being in love with you."

her words were like a balm to the wounds you’d carried for so long, but they also brought a new wave of fear. could you trust her again? could you trust yourself not to fall into the same pattern, the same heartbreak? "what are we supposed to do, amelia?" you asked, voice strained. "ruin each other all over again?"

she shook her head fiercely, determination shining in her eyes. "no. that’s not what i want. i want to love you the way you deserve to be loved. i want to be there for you, support you, make up for all the times i hurt you. and if you’re not ready yet, that’s okay. i’ll wait for you. as long as it takes."

you studied her, really looked at her, and for the first time, you noticed the changes. she seemed different, stronger, more grounded. it was like seeing her for the first time again, and it scared you. what if you had both changed too much? what if the love you’d once shared was gone, replaced by the scars of time and pain?

"i don’t know if we’re the same people we were before," you said quietly, voicing your fear. "we’ve changed, amelia. what if we’re too different now?"

she reached out, her fingers lightly brushing against yours, and the touch sent a spark through you, familiar and new all at once. "then that just means we get to fall in love with each other all over again," she said softly. "we get to learn each other’s hearts from the beginning. we get to build something new. something stronger."

her words resonated with you, and you felt the tension in your chest begin to ease. maybe she was right. maybe love didn’t have to be about holding on to the past. maybe it was about letting go, about choosing to believe in the possibility of something better. something real.

you took a deep breath, letting her words sink in. she was offering you a chance, not a promise that things would be perfect, but a promise that she would try. that she would be there. that she would love you.

"okay," you said finally, your voice barely more than a whisper. "okay, let’s try."

amelia’s eyes lit up with relief, a smile breaking across her face. she stepped closer, and this time, you didn’t move away. Instead, you let her wrap her arms around you, pulling you into a tight embrace. you closed your eyes, resting your head against her shoulder, feeling the warmth of her body against yours. and for the first time in a long while, you felt a sense of peace. a sense of home.

[kanescrown]

a jumelia hookup would change lives (mine it would change mine)