#am i still in love with the gfs i had as a teenager. should i try to find them and rekindle our relationship

[chilschuck]

omg… thinking abt chil reconnecting w his ex wife and becoming platonic besties. imagine they talk about it finding love again (chil’s ex has a new gf)… chil realises he’s caught feelings for reader… his ex teasing him about it…

`✦ ˑ ִֶ 𓂃⊹ OMG ANON THIS HAD ME GIGGLING AND KICKING MY FEET, WAHHHH. SUCH A CUTE IDEA!!!! it’s currently 2 am but i had to get this out for you since you’ve been waiting a while!!! it was so much fun!! <33

— ALL BECAUSE OF YOU.

꒰ info: ꒱ chilchuck x gn!reader

꒰ warnings: ꒱ none, sfw!! some cussing ofc lol

꒰ wc: ꒱ 586

✦ tumblr deleted this before i could post it twice so let’s pray it posts this time, LOL. short but sweet, i hope you enjoy!!! <333

“So… Who are they?”

That simple question was enough to make him choke on his drink. Was he that easy to read? Catching his breath, the half-foot immediately sputtered.

“What are you talking about?” Yet, the knowing look on her face said it all. Even if they had been separated for this long, she could still figure out just what he was hiding. So much for trying to keep some things personal…

“You have this expression, this content smile I haven’t seen in years, Chilchuck. Someone’s making you happy.” Her tone was not condescending in the slightest, rather content with this new revelation. Her words caused his cheeks to flush, more than the ale in his cup could.

And she was right. He was coming to terms with his feelings; and even the thought of you was enough to make him whole again. The fact it was so obvious was rather embarrassing, and he could feel the tips of his ears burn.

“Yeah, yeah… I guess you figured it out before I got a chance to tell you.”

They were nothing like they used to be, having settled on staying close through friendship. Although this maybe would’ve been hard to do in the past, Chilchuck felt more peaceful than he thinks he has in years. There was something about you that lit fire to his senses in ways he had long forgotten, and he found himself seeking you out more than he’d like to admit.

“I’ve told you plenty about my new girlfriend, now it’s your turn to spill. What are they like? It’s a sight to see you this happy.”

It was something only someone who really knew him could see; the change in his demeanor, the light in his eyes, the smile that threatened to spill from the corners of his lips. And it was all because of you.

“You’re going to laugh when I tell you how I met them,” he began, licking the ale from his lips in thought. “Laios’ party. I really ended up eating my own words about inner party romance, huh?” The last sentence came out in a grumble, one that caused her to laugh.

“Wow, they made you go against your own rules? Must be a keeper.”

And you were. Warm, but not enough to burn. Bright, but not blindingly so. Sweet, but not sickening. Chilchuck found himself feeling like a teenager again when it came to you. He bit his tongue.

“So you’re going to confess to them, right?” She teased, prodding his shoulder. “Look at you, blushing like a schoolboy. Must be serious.”

He opened his mouth to retort, before closing it again. The words died before he could speak, the full gravity of his feelings for you hitting him like a freight train. Burying his head in his arms, he groaned. “Shit…”

Chilchuck was doomed. Yet even as his head spiraled from a mixture of the alcohol and his new found love, it always went back to you. You, and your smiles, and your laugh, and your touch. There weren’t enough curse words he could possibly growl out in this moment to make himself feel better.

His ex wife laughed again, patting him on the back and stirring him from his thoughts. “Jeez, you really are a schoolboy. Maybe you should give them a love letter while you’re at it. Might be smart, actually.”

That’s how the rest of their time together went; two close friends musing about the ability to find love again. All because of you.

— dividers by @/cafekitsune! <3

[seneon]

hcs for nagi, rin, sae, bachi, and chigiri + their reaction to you being a huge supporter of another fellow soccer player, who they may or may not like/get along with. i mean reader got jerseys, posters, probably an autograph somewhere idk

I AM THE ORIGINAL.

featuring. nagi seishiro, itoshi rin, itoshi sae, bachira meguru and chigiri hyoma.

genre. crack / comedy, some jealousy, uh idk ngl.. | gn! reader.

notes. wsg ava ‼️ for plot armour, the other fellow soccer will be reo and kaiser LOLOLOLOL. those two are the most suitable imo. guys pls don't kill me i actually don't know what im writing

SEISHIRO NAGI — he doesn't really care.

nagi couldn't care less if you went insane over his best friend in terms of soccer and looks. i mean, it's literally his best friend so why would it bother him? you absolutely made it clear that you love him more than reo and he trusts in you 101% #trustingbf. ofc, there were times where he gets jealous and when he does, he threatens reo instead LMFOA.

RIN ITOSHI — his blood boils. a lot.

rin absolutely despises kaiser's ass. he literally hates every single interaction you've had with kaiser and tends to get very jealous whenever you brought your kaiser merch everywhere you go. he doesn't really show it but trust me, you can sense that his blood boils everytime. still, he tolerates you and your kaiser obsession just because it makes you happy 😞🫶🏻

SAE ITOSHI — he doesn't give a single shit.

sae knows he's way better than kaiser. in every aspect. plus, he has a mindset that you should be the luckiest girl alive to even be dating the itoshi sae... he'd be so egoistic about it. bro, sae probably don't even have time to care for your kaiser obsession.. maybe he'd get a bit protective or controlling about your fangirling but he'll just sigh it off as an average teenage girl interest.

MEGURU BACHIRA — he gets all pouty.

bachira would sulk and playfully get all pouty with you being a fan of reo. he has nothing against reo but sometimes he just wants to strangle reo for catching his gf's attention more than he did. i mean, you have every merch available of reo. bachira will be like "but i'm better than mr. rich guy!" and puff his cheeks in annoyance while crossing his arms.

HYOMA CHIGIRI — he questions your interests.

chigiri literally stares at you weirdly with your kaiser supporting. most of the times, he doesn't understand what's so cool about kaiser and why you even simped for him. he's probably the 'side eye' bf that doesn't even bother to ask his gf questions. chigiri would rather leave than listen to your delulu self talk. xd.

tags — @anqelically | @yuquinzel @itonashi @daiseukiis @adorlings @noomon @s-shirasenpai

[elsfleur]

could i request headcanons of abby or ellie with a gf who is spiritual or a witch? really likes astrology, tarot readings and the like? thank u :)

this is so self indulgent of me because i literally work as a tarot reader and am an astrology girlie so this request absolutely warmed my little witchy heart, yes yes yes!

🔮 ʾ ⠀

✧˚ you had stumbled upon what was clearly a teenage girl’s room in patrol, bright pink walls and polaroids, decorative burnt out lights from christmas trees spread across the ceiling, but most importantly: a stack of gossip magazines that put literature to shame. ellie submitted to her curiosity, quickly scanning through the still vibrant pages until her eyes fell on something curious: horoscopes. studying the small font beneath the latin names filled with dates she finally spoke up: a gemini.

✧˚ you hummed in response, confused, before catching sight of the magazine in her hands: oh, yeah you’re a gemini sun. a scorpio moon too, based on my calculations.

✧˚ a what sun? there are moons too? in all her years of life with a burning passion towards astronomy and space, going as far as dreaming of being an astronaut, something so distant in the reality you lived in, never has she ever heard the words you were speaking, searching through her memory for something and being faced only with constellation names, were you calling her a star?

✧˚ ellie was absolutely enthralled by your astrology knowledge, tearing out the horoscope pages out of all the magazines and carrying them back to your campsite despite having heard you say those were not accurate. she would take the opportunity to bombard you in astronomy facts, eyes glowing as you took the time to explain that beyond being the second planet from the sun and earth’s closest planetary neighbour venus was also a representative of love. she wanted your explanation on all of them, she would suddenly be starting conversations with things such as dina you’re such a leo and you would laugh.

✧˚ the girl was a general skeptic of all things, but when she told you about the retrograde movement of planets and you explained the devastating effects of a mercury retrograde on people, you best believe she would blame every miscommunication to occur during that period on the planet.

✧˚ at one point she would even begin confusing astronomy and astrology among herself, not quite sure where she had gotten the information she was stating as fact to joel until he burst out laughing over the traits of the taurus constellation. she really didn’t see what was so funny.

✧˚ the crystals and tarot cards were a bit too much for her to believe though, rolling her eyes until she fully understood how much those meant to you, choking back laughter as you eagerly explained what some pretty rocks could do energetically and read her future. she was the only one allowed to make fun of you though, elbowing jesse in the ribs when he started to question your card interpretations.

✧˚ you best believe she used your interests to her advantage though, memorising just enough to know if you felt sick she should hand you the light green rock and the pink rock was a love declaration (you gave her a small tumble of rose quartz and she carried it around everywhere), would write you little fake horoscope notes about how it would be a good week for your zodiac sign and a smoking hot auburn haired girl would kiss you that week and placing it by your bed, even went as far as drawing you both as the lovers card, though she would not show you it.

🔮 ʾ ⠀

bonus!

✧˚ abby was the opposite, not caring much for astrology but taking your tarot readings with the utmost seriousness. you once pulled the death card before she was off to patrol and her eyes instantly glistened with tears before you started explaining that was not what that meant.

✧˚ would still ask if your zodiacs were compatible though and absolutely take it to heart if you said they weren’t, deeply offended and claiming there clearly wasn’t any proof to your beliefs. if they were though, she’d point it out with a smirk every single time you spoke of the stars.

[jimmyspades]

Sad Boston Legal analysis at 9 am sorry

Season 3 Alan sees Vanessa in that pretty yellow dress and he can’t stop staring, he tells her why it affects him so deeply:

When I was a sophomore in high school I attended my very first dance. There was this girl, standing across the dance floor, wearing a yellow dress. She was so beautiful. I didn't have the courage to ask her to dance, perhaps for fear of the long lonely walk back across the gym floor after being refused. I finally willed myself to go ask, and then suddenly she was gone, in a fleeting second she must have left. I began to imagine what she must have been like. Her laugh. Certainly her kiss. I still know exactly what that feels like, though l've never felt it. She's been a figment for 29 years. An imagined standard by which all other women seem to have fallen terribly short.

He said it was a sophomore dance so he was probably 14-15, which means he had already been assaulted by his neighbor (s4 ep4: “I was 14, Denny. It was statutory rape. You’re the first person I’ve ever told that to.”) but he hadn’t yet been abused by his best friend Paul’s mom Victoria (explored in The Practice s8 eps 13-15: “Victoria, I was 16. Can a boy even be capable of love? … How many teenagers had you been with?”)

So there’s teenage Alan at the dance, at a very strange, confusing time in his life—

—his parents aren’t there for him, his father doesn’t like him, his mother never hugs him, but recently other adults have started showing him affection; grown women want him and use him sexually, and he thinks he’s flattered by the attention because he’s a stupid horny teenage boy!, of course he should want this!, he’s never been touched and suddenly everyone wants to touch him, even Denny makes a joke of it decades later when Alan finally calls it rape, but he’s still just a child. He’s 14!!!! Suddenly he’s “experienced” and treated like an adult and has a reputation—

—but tonight he’s shyly leaning up against the gymnasium wall, alone, wishing he had the confidence to ask this beautiful girl in his class, his own age, to dance. She was so pretty and safe to him—making up a harmless, idealized girl who would never hurt him at a time when he was being abused and tossed around and confused beyond belief—that for the next 30 years (and beyond) Alan used the idea of her to protect himself.

The idea of her kept his standards so high he could always walk away, he never had to be hurt—because any woman who hurt him clearly wasn’t her, so of course she’d disappoint. He expected this.

Of course Tara broke up with him. Of course Sally wouldn’t stay. Of course the women who had sex with him as a teenager lost interest. Of course he and Gloria would never work out. Of course Phoebe (and several other ex gfs) came back to use him then leave again. Of course his wife died. They weren’t the girl in the yellow dress, they were always going to let him down. “I’ve never met the girl in the yellow dress.” He’s still waiting to find her.

[cinnamonspicewritingroom]

More Than Diamonds

Pairing: Prince Friedrich x Princess! Reader Description:

A hardcore Bridgerton fan, Davika bit the dust in 2021 during a wild protest against Thailand's king on the way home. But instead of the pearly gates, she woke up in the 19th century, suddenly the offspring of Siam's 2nd king and some British lady of mystery descent. Armed with her modern know-how, her main goal is to stack up that cash and upgrade Siam for some chill vibes to avoid being sold off in some arranged marriage mess. But who knew she'd find herself smack in the middle of her beloved Bridgerton drama series? Talk about a plot twist! How's she gonna handle this? Amelia better watch out not to change the story—or is it too late?

Meanwhile, the Brits are buzzing about their new royal guest just in time for the 1813 debutante ball. Princess Amelia of Siam has rolled in as the fresh Ambassador of Siam. With Daphne and Prince Friedrich's courtship hitting the skids, nobody expected him to stick around London, but Friedrich's not one to skedaddle with his tail between his legs. Homeboy's on a mission to snag a wifey and he's not backing down. Friedrich's never been one to back down, but when it comes to Amelia, he's all cold feet. Folks say Amelia's a brainiac, but love? That's a whole different ball game. Those butterflies in her stomach? Yeah, she ain’t got a clue what to do with 'em.

Tags: Slow burn, Coming of age, Time-Travel, Back to the past, Friends to Lovers, Royalties, Oblivious!FLxObvious!ML, Jealous! Friedrich, Slightly Possessive! Friedrich, Black cat gf, Golden retriever bf Timeline: S1&S2

Chapter 2. Princes and a Princess

Calm down, Davika—No, Apsara. Davika is dead; now she is Somdet Chao Fa Apsara Chaiya Kanika, and she fought for her title. Breathe in through your nose, and out through your mouth. You learned this in your overpriced yoga class before you bit the dust and got transported into the middle of the fucking Bridgerton series. 

Focus on the present—right now she is having tea with Golda Rosheuvel—Queen Charlotte, the lineup of princes who are yet to marry, and the current Prince Regent, Prince George IV.

“Lady Amelia, I heard that you are a driving force in the Siamese court,” Prince George IV looked at the Siamese Ambassador. He did not know what he expected, but not a petite-looking teenager; she is not even a woman yet. To believe that she has been advising the Crown Prince and King in the Siamese court was truthfully hard.

“Surely you jest, your highness. I am not much of a driving force as you implied. My achievements are minuscule compared to the King and Crown Prince. I merely stated my opinions on several topics. They are generous enough to listen to my chatter,” Amelia politely responded.

“Starting very young, at the age of 13 years old, I heard you had helped the Crown Prince, Prince Rama III, to establish education for girls by creating a law in which every citizen, man or woman alike, had the fundamental rights to education.” Several of the princes chatted with one another; one of them stated how women's education is useless and how their position is to stay at home with the children. Girl—wait till you hear about the 21st century; women can vote and work.

“And pray tell, why did you think education for women is useless, Prince Frederick?” This put the spotlight on Prince Frederick, who was talking to Prince Augustus. The Queen eyed him sharply; Frederick knew he had to thread this carefully, especially since he was in the presence of the Ambassador of Siam; they could potentially pull all rights for trading and business in their land. They cannot afford that right now, not while they are still at war with Napoleon.

“I think women are gentle creatures who need to be loved. Rather than dealing with harsh politics and boring numbers, they should be surrounded by beautiful things. Music, poetry, paintings. Do you not agree, Lady Amelia?” He looked so proud of his words; Amelia wanted to gag at his face, but instead she chuckled and slightly shook her head.

“May I ask you a question?” Still glowing in pride, he only answered with a gesture, which probably meant ‘go ahead.’ “When you were still a child, which parent did you see more? Your father or your mother?” Several of the princes glanced at their mother, including Prince Frederick. The Queen gestured to him to answer Amelia’s question.

“As my father was busy with work, naturally I saw my mother more than him.” Amelia nodded. “And which parent oversees your education? The one who consulted with the governor, asked you about your progress?” Prince Frederick paused before answering, “My mother, of course. Is it not natural that children will spend more time with their mother? After all, fathers are usually busy and away often.” Amelia smiled subtly.

“Absolutely, mothers are the ones who spend more time with their children compared to their father—” “And as they are at home, why would women burden themselves with education? They should focus on raising the children and make sure they are raised properly.” Amelia stared at the prince for several seconds before she picked up her tea to take a sip.

“Queen Charlotte,” Amelia changed her tactics and turned towards the Queen, who was staring at her with interest. “I heard you were originally from Germany?” The Queen blinked and frowned a bit; she was a bit disappointed that the Siamese Ambassador backed down from the debate against her son. Maybe she is not as brilliant as rumoured.

“Why, yes, I came from the Duchy of Mecklenburg-Strelitz, located in Northern Germany. You should come visit; it is a very beautiful place.” Smiling, The Queen had a look of longing and pride for her country. Amelia nodded. “I will inform the King; maybe he will consider visiting Northern Germany for his annual honeymoon destination.” The Queen nodded with a smile and proceeded to pick up her tea. She was quite pleased with that answer. 

“Your Majesty, I am quite curious about the subject of education for European noblewomen. If education is limited to males, what subjects are allowed for noblewomen to learn?” So Lady Amelia did not back down; the Queen smiled behind her cup.

“Noblewomen are taught how to read and write; they learn about cultures, music, art, and literature. However, as the Queen of England, I need to understand the history of the country and calculations.” How will the Ambassador answer her son after she gives her ammunition?

“If you don’t mind me asking, how does your education experience help you manoeuvre your children’s education? Such as, have you ever consulted subjects you deemed more necessary for the princesses and princes with their governor and governess?” Out of the corner of her eye, Amelia eyed Prince Frederick. He was still looking as smug as ever with his lukewarm answer.

“Lady Amelia, my children are the future of the country. My job is to make sure they receive the best education possible, so of course I would need to consult with the governor. God knows how many times I consulted them, and even more often for me to help them learn and understand what they were learning about.” The whole time Amelia was looking at Prince Frederick. “And you raised them beautifully, Your Majesty. They could not be like this without you.” Amelia sweetly smiled at the Queen before fully turning around to face Prince Frederick.

“You see, Prince Frederick. We have established that mothers spend more time with their children, more than their father. Mothers are the ones who oversee their children’s education, but more than that, they are also their first educators.” She needed that. The pettiness to emphasise that word.

“If the mother has no solid education, then it is easy for the children’s education to go astray. It was fortunate that you were born royal with a mother who had received proper education in her early years. Your mother was able not only to consult with the governor and governess but also helped with your learning process. Unfortunately, not everyone is lucky enough.” Amelia knows she has won the argument with these facts; she just… wanted him to burn a bit more.

“Prince George.” The said Prince perked up. “From what I remembered during the introduction, you are the Prince Regent, correct?” “Yes, you are right.” He confirmed as Amelia gave him a strained smile.

“I must confess, I am never one to stick my nose where it doesn’t belong. I don’t know how you run your country, but I know the Siam I envision it to be.” Amelia sighed, her thumb tracing the edge of the saucer.

“We want to establish peace in the country, and we want equality for everyone. That is impossible without having the citizens educated. Women included because women count.” Her light brown eyes met Prince George’s dark ones. He can see it now; this is Lady Amelia, who rose in the Siamese court in a mere three years before starting her role as an Ambassador.

“Because women are a part of our people. The law is not only to give them a chance to do what they want but also to protect the women from getting blamed for their children’s education.” Amelia may sound cocky about this matter. She was aware that this could potentially insult the Queen and the Princes, but since they laid the stage themselves, might as well show them why Siam is not a country to be messed with, why they are a progressive country.

“We need to educate the children and citizens; therefore, they have the ability to process and filter liable information in order to create a strong and united Siam. That is my opinion about why it is necessary to establish the law of education.” As she concluded her discussion, Amelia could see the sour faces of the princes.

Queen Charlotte should be angry at the Ambassador for embarrassing her sons, but Lady Amelia was correct. It was an impressive debate; instead of debating Frederick on what-ifs, Lady Amelia used her, his mother, as an example.

“Now that it’s done, come with me, Lady Amelia. I would love to show you my peacock collection.” Queen Charlotte stood up, followed by Amelia as they exited the room. The princes who were left in the room stared at the two retreating figures before the footman closed the doors.

“What a petty woman. She strung mother along in order to win the argument,” Prince Frederick huffed in distaste as he stared at the closed doors.

“Please, Frederick, you are just angry you lost,” Edward chuckled as he picked up a scone. “I think she is interesting,” he continued while spreading jam before taking a bite of the scone.

“She’s far too young for you, Edward. If you try anything, it will cause a strain in our relationship with Siam,” George said as he picked up two sugar cubes, dropping them into his tea.

***

For almost an hour, Queen Charlotte showed Amelia her colourful peacock collection, which is truly fascinating, as Amelia even got the chance to hand-feed one of the birds under the keeper’s watch, despite Queen Charlotte’s hesitation. Queen Charlotte and Amelia discussed many things: their differences in art and cultures, sports played in each country, fashion, even education. The Queen was so fascinated by Amelia’s decree to make it mandatory for girls to also get education that she questioned the education system in Siam. Amelia really likes talking to Queen Charlotte; she is curious and genuinely interested in her opinions and beliefs, which became her drive to make Siam a better country for the people. Yes, the Queen might be a strict person, but she is someone who is.

“Before I leave, can I ask you something, Your Majesty?” Amelia asked as they ventured into the garden. The Queen glanced at the young lady next to her. “Why of course, ask away, my dear.” Amelia braced herself to spit out the question. “Could you please tell me where the Duke and Duchess of Gloucester and Edinburgh live currently?” Out of all the questions the Ambassador could have asked, Charlotte never thought it would be that one. “The— Why?” Compared to debating with one of the princes, the Ambassador looked way more scared asking that question.

“I have a letter I need to deliver. It was a personal request from the King.” Queen Charlotte raised a brow. Her brother-in-law and his wife, Abigail of Gloucester nee. Bridgerton, received a letter from the Siamese Royal family? Amelia caught her expression and quickly explained.

“His Majesty, the King… I heard that he was one of the students of the Siam’s Ambassador to London at the time…” Amelia explained slowly. “Perhaps His Majesty has made some sort of relationship with the Duke of Gloucester and Edinburgh during his time here…” The Queen nodded, acknowledging the possibility.

“Alright, I will make sure the letter will reach the Duke of Gloucester and Edinburgh. Do you have the letter with you?” Amelia's eyes met the Queen in surprise and nodded her head. “I have it with Lynn, my secretary.” Amelia turned towards Lynn and signalled her to come to her.

“Your Majesty, Milady—” Lynn greeted before continuing with her question. “Anything I could possibly help you with?” Amelia nodded. “Do you bring the letter from His Majesty the King to the Duke and Duchess of Gloucester and Edinburgh?” Lynn nodded and reached for the handbag she was carrying and took out a leather pouch embossed with the emblem of the Rattanakosin Kingdom.

Amelia grabbed it, and passed it to Queen Charlotte, but was received by her secretary- Brimsley. “Brimsley, quickly send it to Prince William.” Brimsley silently bowed, and exited the room. 

“Your Majesty, I sincerely thank you from the bottom of my heart for your generosity to help me.” Amelia sincerely bowed to the Queen for the help she provided. The Queen merely smiles her way, being sincerely appreciated for her generosity is quite rare these days. The last person who often appreciates her, willing to spend lots of time with her, and someone she genuinely enjoys spending her time with, was her nephew, Princess Felicia of Gloucester, only child and daughter to Prince William Henry and Lady Abigail Bridgerton. Sadly she ran away 23 years ago. The Queen sighed, and focused on the present once more. 

“It is alright, dear. However, if you really want to thank me, maybe you can come visit me for tea sometimes.” Amelia gave her a huge smile and nodded. Queen Charlotte was always one of her favourite characters in the Bridgerton series, and despite being a devoted wife and mother, she has quite a tragic background due to the pressure of being a wife, a Queen and a mother.

“Your Majesty, I must thank you for the tour and the delightful afternoon tea. It was refreshingly different from what we have in Siam.” Amelia paused, wondering if she’s allowed to say this. “Queen Charlotte, I must say that I admire you. Not only as a Queen, but also as a mother who is able to raise not only one, but 15 children. I hope your children share the same sentiments.” Amelia gave her a sincere smile and curtsy before walking out.

Words: 2293 words

Edited: 02/04/2024

More Than Diamond's Master List

IMPORTANT NOTES A/N: Hello, how are you guys? I hope you are well. Regarding this story that is following Julia Quinn's hit series, Bridgerton, I would start by saying I read the book first before I watch the Netflix series, thus I apologize if there are some differences with the Netflix version, but I will try to make it as similar as possible. I would also ask the readers to be kind when criticizing this story as this is my first time to actually publishing my work in the open. For the story, as you can see there is a time-travel tag. Our reader was sent back to the past with all the knowledge from the future. If you are also confused with Davika's education, I actually based her using Spencer Reid, a character from Criminal Minds. I also made Friedrich to be a year younger than Benedict when in actuality, he was born in 1794, 2 years younger than Daphne. If you are not interested or felt like those 2 themes ruined a historical romance story, then please do not leave any bad comments as you can just stop reading this story. Thank You Very Much! Much Love, Cinnamon Meilleure's Writing Room

[pond---scum]

Eight shows to get to know you :) I was tagged by @thetideseternaltune

I’ve taken the ‘getting to know me’ part to heart - I don’t even follow tags for all these shows on tumblr. They are not necessarily my favourite right now, nor are they the shows I write/read fanfic for.

In no particular order:

Numb3rs - I grew up without a tv, so numb3rs was the first show I really picked out for myself, and I started watching it when I was ~15. It’s the only show I’ve ever gone out and bought every season of for myself. It’s just a really solid monster of the week detective show, with subtle and charming characters who are not too closely involved in the plots they investigate. Which is exactly my jam. One of my friends watched Numb3rs and chatted with me briefly about it, but I’ve otherwise never fangirled over it with anyone. Even though I still count it as one of my favourite shows of all time 15 years down the track. I’ve actually never read fanfic for Numb3rs, and I know next to nothing about the making of. I wouldn’t recognise the names of the actors or any of the showrunners, which is actually my ideal media consumption experience xD 

Buffy - First show I ever watched while surrounded by people who are obsessed with the show, and I had an excellent time with it. It was interesting because all my friends were teenagers when they watched it for the first time, but I was in my early twenties, and it was really interesting to see where my experiences of the show diverged from theirs. I don’t usually read Buffy fanfic, and some of my Buffy opinions are pretty controversial :P I think seasons 4-6 are the best, and I love Riley which seems to really bother some of my friends xD

Fallet - This show is a fucking fever dream. It took me a whole episode to work out that it was a comedy, it had some real ‘Douglas Adams’ vibes at the end, which was fun. It’s a murder mystery set in sweden that uses a mix of swedish and english, and it is best described as ‘kooky.’ My only IRL friend who watched it (after much nagging) did so while slightly feverish with covid. They seemed to have a good time, but I would not recommend doing this xD It’s wild enough without the delirium.

Vera - the quintessential ‘slow moving, episodic, british murder mystery.’ Vera is awesome (especially in the early seasons) for just being really fucking good. My favourite thing about this show is the leading lady - Vera is a grumpy, frumpy, middle aged woman without a maternal bone in her body. I am so sick of women needing to be kind and selfless to be a protagonist.

VGHS - now for something completely different! It’s a show made by a youtube special effects guy about a high school where you learn to play videogames. And it made me cry. A death notification set to an in-universe laugh track? Sign me up! It’s mostly super goofy, and the main character is way less interesting than all his friends, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. Probably the closest thing to a pure comedy I will watch, but it makes it oddly poignant moments all the sweeter. Also, 10/10 ending. I don’t read fanfic of it either, and these days I’m waaay too old for the characters personally. I definitely had a bit of a thing for the main character’s gf tho. Ngl.

Shetland - I do this thing where I avoid looking at fan content for a show if I’m enjoying it on its own merits, because I want to experience it without the brain rot. Kinda weird, but it works for me. Shetland is funny because I could immediately see a pairing I wanted to explore, but I waited years for the show to go downhill before I let myself open ao3. Luckily, I think they caught up with the books, and changed hands around season 4ish, because the quality nosedived and I have read and written so many things for Jimmy/Duncan, and do not intend to stop xD I actually haven’t had the heart to watch the latest season, because I don’t think I’ll enjoy it all that much. Cool theme song though! And everyone should watch the early short seasons.

Capitani - I hate the hays code. And not just because of the moralising and the homophobia - it makes storytelling predictable. The impact it continues to have on all english speaking media is never more obvious than when you watch something from another part of the world and are completely blindsided by the emotional arc. Capitani fucking killed me. I’ve read that Capitani is Luxembourg’s only globally successful media product. I don’t know if that’s true, but I wasn’t sure if Luxembourg was a country or a city before I watched it, so it’s probably not far from the truth. I now have a fun little rap song in Luxembourgish on my spotify playlist! It won my heart forever when they set up a joke and completed it four episodes later without any call backs. Imagine having that much faith in your audience! I would read the shit out of fanfiction of the fucked up love story between Capitani and Karla, but unfortunately, there is none :(

MASH - My ex step father owned every season of MASH on DVD, and when I was 14 my friend and I would rush to my house to watch them while having sit-up competitions. I don’t know why this was a fun activity for two 14 year old girls, but I have so many fond memories of this time. It was the first tv show I ever watched sequentially, and the first show I ever watched start to finish. It was also the reason I beat all the boys in my class when we had to do those fitness tests in PE! xD I’m personally a bigger fan of the show post-season 3 when they had the big tone shift. While there are definitely funny scenes, the image in my head when someone mentions MASH is always Charles smashing up his record player. So while it’s famous as a comedy, that’s not really how I remember it. I keep meaning to go look up the show on ao3, because I am sooo curious about what the common pairings are, and what kind of tone the fics take.

I had a lot of fun with this :) Thanks for tagging me! I’m way too shy to tag eight people, but would love to hear about the viewing past of: @republicofgaypirates @galadriel1010 @leliesblou @scullyverse @justplainsalty

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary301

7/16-17/24

tuesday - wednesday

gf is still at work.

and i feel really hideous, like i look at my face, i see so much wrong with it, and i feel like my hair is stupid and making my face look long and other words i can use that will hurt my own feelings, a bunch of stuff re: dysphoria basically. unpleasant. i do not like that i feel like i can't even know what i actually look like. the image shifts and i can't gather what i am at all. it's just like... ugly. i feel so ugly and like i look at my face and wonder if it's always seemed so masculine or if tomorrow i'll wake up and feel fine. it's so weird. maybe it's just being inside a lot right now.

anyway, today i re-did some lyrics, so tomorrow i should be ready to try them out.

i also got a new song mostly written, roughly, i think i need to work on making it easier to follow though. there's a little synth in it that kind of makes some moments weird to follow, i need to mix it down i think. that and some drum patterns are weird, maybe i need to also mix out some mids from the snare so the guitar comes through a little more, and boost that too.

i didn't do too much else today... i feel like i am giving myself a bit of option paralysis right now, with music, there's anxiety working on stuff cuz i don't wanna deal with crashes, that paired with the fact that i have a lot of material waiting to be worked on, + new ideas already written out like those tabs (i need to do some more of that it's very fun), there's a lot here for an ep or however many i want to do. i'm happy for that, of course, and i'm deciding maybe the hard limit on time should be like 15-20 mins on this one. we'll see where i end up, but i guess at minimum, 21-22 minutes (extra 1-2 minutes as flex time but really i would prefer under 20 but over 15...).

anyway,,, i listened to the whole ep this song is off of today, crazy views on this i forgot abt that:

the overall effect this song has feels very mr. oizo, while not really sounding like it at all. the chiptune synth is rather pristine, all the sounds are, but it feels so cheap and scuzzy still, really great thing, that.

another song i spent a while looking for this morning, talking about that one japanese idol group with all the dots in their name, they were dancing to this fred frith no wave release, the band's called massacre, the frith thing, but it got me on the thought train of j pop no wave, and i had to go and hunt for this:

i'd never seen the video before!!!! it's like the inside of my head!!!!!!!! it's like everything i like, and the song too, it's so funny, when i heard it like, in 2018 it must have been, it was so special to me.

also yesterday i was revisiting teenage jesus and the jerks, to keep it on no wave, i hadn't heard them for such a long time, but they're still very very good, to me at least, and i guess it's more about the inventive guitar thrashing and lydia's vocals, the drums aren't as energetic as i'd like, i guess, they are rather minimal, which is fine and maybe i should think about working with drums like that more, cuz i do have a tendency to make some stuff toooooo messy. or idk. not too messy, cuz i like it. but you know, it makes problems, but they're problems worth having for me i suppose, anyway here's a track i like a lot:

love the scrape of the geetarzzz here, it's funny, when i first heard them, it must have been before this compilation had come out, because i was stuck with this other one that had this cover on spotify, this was back in highschool, so it must have been in 2015 before that comp w/ lydia on the cover + pink came out (oh, i guess it was actually just reissued then, how odd, it was not online before then, i think it also came with a remaster, though, the 1995 comp does sound a little different) or before then in 2014:

it's such a vivid memory to me because my parents took away my headphones because of something dumb i don't really want to get into, and i still wanted to listen to my dumb fucked up music, so i was playing this on the computer in the dining room, where my computer had to be and stuff, and my mom walked up to me and asked wtf i was listening to, not that she's not into weirder stuff, she tried to get me into zappa around that time, but honestly he doesn't do too much for me, i have a friend who has had better luck with him though, anyway, it was so embarrassing for me, to be caught like that, but it's what i liked. soooo whateverrrrrrrr.

here's something else and then i gotta sleep:

i never heard this / saw it, idk why he'd delete this because the music video is at least probably one of the best of the last decade. not really even exaggerating it feels like a meditation on the weird place violence has in american youth culture and the runoff from videogames, where it's like this derealized cruelty, and then all the sports imagery, it's like from within these really american/western feeling things, at least portrayed at their most american, like paintball and airsoft, military fetishism, the fortnite dance in the football field, that part's like, it blows my mind a little. idk how he made that work as a poignant moment, it's like, humorous of course, it knows, and still it works. that is special! it feels super observant of our surroundings and the undercurrent that's got no recourse outside of like, the avoidance / attempt to sublimate / impossibility of reckoning with it, the impossibility as like, an excuse to just ignore, you know, like the girl just kind of looking like an ad for vr headsets, the super commercial look of the whole thing, the perfect cameras for most of it, everything with that wal-mart / best-buy tv demo sheen, but it's all pointed and a little venomous, it's like, got teeth in the eagerness to avoid, you know. it's crazy, anyway back to my points re: it using stuff that's so american, it's like reaching some kind of actual american denpa thing almost. not the music but the kinda stuff that came out that people describe as denpa in anime and movies. also like the willingness to have that little interlude part with the guitar in the middle of the track sound like pure buttrock is crazy. like what the hell. that's bold as hell. damon rush is definitely kind of a #genius rn. he could outlast the hellp maybe. we will see though. i really love the shot of the fortnite dance in the football field... that and the part where they're shooting the shirtless kid with paintballs... and when he gets the ball kicked into his head. the pseudo execution scene is like. it's soooo loaded!! it really feels crazy to see idk. it's a very exciting piece of art . for me .

anyway , i have to sleep now

so

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[golbrocklovely]

I think i worded my one last talk poorly, so let me correct myself. I didn’t mean to say that Colby or Malia owe us something, i know they don’t. They are obligated to post whatever the fuck they want , yes. What i meant was that whenever I see hate for Malia , it is 90% hate about her body or het “not having a persona”, I know they do not have to prove anything to us , especially if some fans are so ungrateful for many things, but showing some other sides of Malia, like even just a short vid for the story would maybe shut the people up and their agenda of her “not being anything besides blah blah blah”

I didn’t mean it to sound like i am hating on either M or C. I don’t care about their relationship, but as a woman it hurts to see such ridiculous things being written on another woman by some teenage girls whose delusions were destroyed, the minute c found a gf

i understand what you're saying, however like i mentioned in my response, i still think this fandom (or at the very least those that hate malia) would still dislike her even if she posted her personality. she could be an amazing person, and i'm sure she is, but that's not gonna change the fact that at the end of the day she's dating colby. and since so many fans legitimately thought they had a chance with him, when he's off the market, it feels like a personal attack when really these same fans were never an option in the first place. and so they take it out on her.

too many fans think they own snc, colby especially, and that's why they're upset that he's not listening to them. this fandom is too used to colby being on their beck and call all the time, so when he's finally doing something that makes him happy and he doesn't care what others are saying, they don't know how to handle it.

what's frustrating is that i get why these fans are acting the way they are. god knows it took me years to be less misogynistic, bc i had so much internal and external misogyny. i did very similar things to them, thought lowly of other women, the whole 9. that's why i wish these fans would just wake up and realize that malia isn't the problem here. her showing her body is not an issue. her having had an onlyfans isn't an issue. it should NEVER be an issue in the first place.

but the goal post will continue to move bc no woman ever measures up to societal standards. and the sooner we all realize that, the easier it will be to love ourselves and other women.

[deadgrantaires]

man devi.anta.rt has GOT to stop being a hot topic bc it is making me go digging through my old accounts too long making me think i miss my exes and need to talk to them. brain poisoning

[larryjohnsonsbitch]

May I request sal x fem reader

Sal and Ashley been hanging out lately , sal gf starts overthinking that maybe sal doesn’t like her anymore so she starts avoiding him . Then after awhile sal confronts his gf , she tells him the reason she been avoiding him and it ends with smut. ❤️ can this be kinda angsty and long pls ,take your time with it🥺❤️ Thank you

Hi sunflower!

I’m so sorry for how long this took to write, I’ve been really struggling with motivation for a while so when I had a sudden burst of it at 1am this was the product.

Hope you enjoy!

WARNING: NSFW MINORS DNI

Your boyfriend and ash had always been close, hanging out often and such. You were very much aware of the crush that Sal used to have on ash and he always makes it clear that your the one he loves, not some silly teenage crush, but truly love.

But no matter how much you pushed and shoved away the negative thoughts that clouded your mind as he laughed at her jokes, they always came back.

What if I’m not enough. What if he doesn’t want me anymore. She’s always been prettier, funnier too. He’d be happier if I just leave. I need to leave.

So that’s how you found yourself slowly moving away from the love of your life, no longer answering texts as fast as you used too no matter how much you wanted to reply the second you saw his name. And watching as ash held into his arm showing him something in the store window that made the both of them smile.

And no matter how much it killed you, they looked like a good couple.

So as days turned to weeks and those weeks into a month, the space you put between you and your boyfriend grew evermore leaving him wondering what he had done and if you had found someone better.

Until one day as you were in the apartment kitchen making lunch, ash knocked at the door and sal opened it. You eyed her suspiciously, unable to help it as you saw the light blush dusting her cheeks and the way she fluttered her eyelashes at Sal. She reached to grab his hand and pulled it closer to her.

The sick feeling in your stomach only grew.

So this is it. I knew he would leave me, but why so soon? Why am I never good enough. this isn’t fair.

You quickly left the kitchen entering the bathroom as quickly as you could before the sobs came, crashing through you like tidal waves of sadness, you struggles to breathe as you sat in the floor, eyes blurred from the tears that ran down your face mixing with the snot and mucus. It wasn’t pretty, most certainly not like the girls from the movies.

It was the that the you heard the soft knock at the door, the pattern and rhythm created a little song which instantly gave away who it was, Sal.

He opened the door tentatively as if not to scare you and you steeled yourself for what was to come.

“Darling, are you alright” that wasn’t what you were expecting, he knelt in front of you taking off his prosthetic and holding you face in his hands, wiping away your tears.

“I’m so sorry, Sal” you could feel another wave of sobs coming as you spoke “I’m sorry I can’t be good enough for you, but you should be happy- with ash.” You hiccuped and and struggled to breath all throughout your sentence; but once you had finished, Sals lips crashed into yours.

He pulled away, pressing his for head to yours looking deeply into your eyes, his eyes were such a bright blue it feet like you were looking at the sunniest blue sky.

“Is that why you’ve been distant? You think I could ever leave you?”

He kissed you once more and it felt like pure happiness was being released into you as he pulled you tighter.

“You think I could ever leave someone so perfect. So beautiful. So amazing.” He punctuated each compliment with a kiss. “Let me show you how special you are”

He stood up, holding out his hand to you- still frowning after he moved away- and helped you to your feet.

He pulled you through your apartment to your shared bedroom and pushed you into the bed.

He crawled on-top of you, pushing his knee between your thighs as heat pooled to your core.

He kissed you like a starving man having his first meal and pure ecstasy ran through you veins at the feeling. His hands ran beneath your shirt, gently playing with your nipples before fully removing your shirt.

He took one of your perked nipples into his mouth and sucked at it, rolling it softly between his teeth, the other he okayed with in his hand softly punching and playing with it causing soft moans to fall from your lips as you bucked your hips, desperate for any kind of friction. But instead of heeding to your neediness he held your hips down to stop them from bucking and moved down from your nipples leaving a trail of wet kisses down your chest and stomach.

He stopped at the waistline of your pants, a smirk on his lips as he moved his hand to your heat feeling the wetness that has soaked through you pants.

“So wet for me already, baby” he kissed the top of your head softly before slowly removing your pants.

“Your so good to me, y/n. I could never leave you, even if you hurt me, even if it kills me. I would stay. With you.”

His words caused a shiver to run through your body as you arched into him.

He quickly removed you pants, then removed his own clothes. You sat up and wrapped your arms around his neck, kissing him passionately, pressing yourself into him as much as possible. One of his hands tugged at your hair whilst the other found your clit and rubbed it in teasing circular motions causing a moan to fall from your lips at the pleasure.

“Hngh~ Ah- Sal, please, please fuck me” your voice came out breathy as he chuckled at your desperation.

“Alright, princess, your wish is my command” he guided his tip to your entrance, rubbing it along your clit before slowly entering it into you.

He held you close to him whispering sweet praises as you took him until you were fully on his cock, you bounced slightly trying to tease Sal, you were successful, he groaned tipping his head back and gripping your hips tightly before leaning into your ear, breathe hot and his voice deep.

“I’m gonna fuck you til you don’t remember your own name” A shiver ran down your spine at his words; and he nibbled softly at your ear love before pushing you back down to the bed.

He didn’t start slowly, no, he pulled out and then slammed back into you, holding you legs up to your head for better access.

A scream fell from your lips as he abused your pussy, repeatedly hitting your g-spot. You arched you back desperately bucking your hips to him and gripping the sheets desperately.

“Fuck, my love, you feel so good around me” he groaned, tipping his head back as sweet moans fell from your lips at the pleasure.

“Haaah~ Sal, m’gonna”

“It’s alright, love, cum for me”

He leaned down to you kissing you passionately as your orgasm ripped through you. He came quickly after his hips faltering as he released into you.

He pulled out and flipped you around so your ass was in the air and face was pushed into the pillows.

Goosebumps rose on your skin as Sal licked a line from your clit to your entrance, before grabbing his shirt and tying it around your eyes as a blindfold, you whimpered as all of your senses were now amplified and you could feel his hot breathe on you pussy and his bulge pressed against your thigh.

You moved your thigh slightly, trying to rub his dick but you received a growl and his hands holding you in place.

He kissed your aching core, then pushed his tongue inside you eliciting filthy moans from your mouth as he begun eating you out,

It wasn’t even five minutes before he had you cumming in his tongue.

He removed the blindfold gingerly pressing a kiss you lips. But despite your tiredness you were suddenly over come with the urge to mark him up so much that Ash wouldn’t fucking dare go near him.

You gripped his shoulders, pushing him to the bed so he was underneath you.

you straddled him, grinding against his cock as he groaned.

You sucked at his neck harshly, biting it softly every once in a while and once there was a deep hickey left you moved to the next one until he was gonna have a lot of trouble hiding all of them, not that you’d let him hide them.

He whined at the lack of attention to his dick, bucking his hips up, rubbing it against your ass. You giggled softly and hopped off of him your finger trailed down his chest to the base of his cock. You sat between his legs looking up at him with big eyes. He let out a soft ‘fuck’ looking at you before falling back into the pillows.

You rubbed his tip softly, before leaving a long lick on the underside of his dick from the base to the tip.

You kissed it softly before taking it slowly In your mouth. But apparently Sals patience had run out he gripped your hair tightly forcing you down, you gagged on his length as he began face fucking you, tears fell from your face as you desperately tried to keep up, sucking his length and swishing your tongue around him.

“FUCK, Y/N, M’GONNA” a loud moan left his lips lewdly.

His cum spilled into you mouth, the salty substance tasted gross but it didn’t stop you from looking him dead in the eyes, swallowing and licking your lips.

You fell beside him on the bed, cuddling into his chest listening to his heart beat as he kissed the top of your head.

“I love you” he said it so softly and sincerely that a smile couldn’t help but spread across your face.

“I love you too”

“Good because I never want you to ignore me again” he brought his hands to your sides tickling you as you squealed at him to stop.

It’s safe to say the next morning you both wore the hickeys you gained with pride, you especially, flaunting them at Ash.

[avintagekiss24]

Hi! I don't want to start anything on here and am always willing for civil conversations. At this point there's so much I've found out about Seb (besides the video he liked, the tommy lee thing, and the girlfriend thing) that I feel so guilty if I would continue to support him. I love him sm but it just doesn't look good rn. He is associated/follows an organisation (for helping veterans) that has posted a blue lives matter flag picture and who's co-founder has sexual assault allegations against him, and worked with him in 'The last full measure'. His friend Paul Walter Hauser has done blackface in the past, and when called out on it he just listed a few people that also did blackface. There's more, I found a discussion on here that I can link. I seriously don't support "cancel culture" bc I don't think it helps anyone but there are just a lot of 'mistakes' and shady people that can be linked to Seb, I wish it wouldn't be that way. I honestly don't know what to think about it anymore.

Hi! I’m also open to having civil conversations and I don’t believe you’re trying to start anything. I really do think this situation of dragging up a four year old video and taking it completely out of context is harmful not just to Black people, but to fandom/activism in general. This is gonna be long because I’m going to take your points one by one, and I want to preface this by saying that I will not answer any derogatory, sideways asks pertaining to this subject. I will delete every single one and will block your silly ass. I’m not going to argue with people who think I’m blindly supporting Sebastian because I’m just trying to get fucked by him, or people who think I hate myself and am trying to appease some white man.

So, on with the discourse!

The video he liked - this video was taken completely out of context and that is my main issue with this whole situation. It was not a video of a white man saying that he thinks he should be able to say the n word as everyone claimed it was. They were quickly debating on whether or not it's okay to say in rap lyrics. He was told no, that's not okay, that's never okay and they moved on from it. That's it. End of story. That somehow was twisted into a click bait style headline of "Sebastian Stan likes a video of a white man defending his right to say the n word" when that is absolutely not true. My other issue is that people are more upset that Sebastian liked the video than they are about the white man in the video literally saying the n word. So, do you really care about the use of the n word like you're claiming? Cuz if you do, you'd be more upset at the white man that said the word than you would be about the white man simply liking the video. Or, are you just using this as an excuse to grandstand against a white man you don't like?

The Tommy Lee thing - Sebastian Stan playing Tommy Lee does not make Sebastian Stan a bad person. Is Charlize Theron a bad person for playing Aileen Wuornos, a prostitute who started murdering men? Is Leonardo DiCaprio a bad person for playing a slave owner? Is Edward Norton a bad person for playing a nazi sympathizing racist? Actors play bad people. That doesn't mean that they themselves are bad people. 1990's Tommy Lee was a bad person, but that should have no bearing on who Sebastian Stan is or his character as a man.

The gf/Paul Walter Hauser thing - Why are we holding Sebastian accountable for what the people around him are doing? Again, why are we more upset that Sebastian is associated with people who have done questionable things than the specific people themselves? I'm not going to speak on the kimono wearing -- I'm not Asian. It's not my place to say whether or not its offensive because it's not my culture, but she posted that picture and attended that party before she started dating Sebastian, quite possibly before she even knew him. Same with Paul. I think that black face thing was long before he knew Sebastian. Now, if Sebastian was defending these actions, going around saying "I think it's okay for white women to wear Kimono's" "I think black face is fine" "I think white people should be able to say the n word" then we'd have a different story, wouldn't we? But that's not what we have, and that's not what he is doing. He is not responsible for the things his friends do or have done in the past just because he's more famous than they are, and he is not required to speak on them. Let's put it this way -- would you be comfortable having to be responsible for something a friend of yours did before you knew them? Would you want to have to be forced to answer for your friend when you yourself had nothing to do with the questionable behavior?

The organization that supports the military/blue lives matter - Sebastian cannot control what message that foundation puts out and it does not mean that he is or is not pro-police himself. There is not enough concrete evidence -- if any evidence for that matter -- that Sebastian is a blue lives matter supporter. Did Sebastian donate before they put up the blue lives matter post? Or after? I don’t know, cuz I don’t follow him that closely, but if he donates before they come out with a particular stance, that means he should be held accountable for that? I know I donated to an organization once and they turned out to support something that i’m 100% against. That means I’m a bad person because I couldn’t see into the future? Another point, how can we be certain that Sebastian saw the blue lives matter post in the first place? I know I’m not online 24 hrs a day, I miss posts all the time and I’m just an average person. I make three or four tumblr posts a day, and I’m gone. I have to play catch up on social media, and even then, I still miss stuff. So I’m sure the same happens to a working actor. As for the co-founder, I don't know who this person is and would rather not get into any allegations against them because I don't want to trigger anyone who comes across this post. If Sebastian knows about these allegations, is a willing participant/supporter of this person then yeah, that's pretty shitty, but we don't know the inner workings of this friendship/acquaintance/work relationship. We don’t know how close they are or if they even still speak.

I’m a pretty big fan of Don Cheadle. He’s a stand up guy, he’s a great actor, he’s funny, he’s political and stands up for what he believes in and in a very public way. I support him. Don Cheadle is also friends with Chris Evans, RDJ, Mark Ruffalo, and Letitia Wright (just to name a few). Chris Evans has a bipartisan forum that highlights/promotes right wing politicians, RDJ defended Chris Pratt during the whole “he’s the worst Chris in Hollywood” crap, who’s technically done black face, and who once said to a female reporter “nice tits” when she walked into the room, Mark Ruffalo just walked back his support of Palestine, and Letitia Wright retweeted/supported an anti-vaxxer/anti-trans Pastor who equated an ingredient of the covid vaccine to the devil because it contained some parts of the word Lucifer. Does that mean Don is now a bad person because he’s friends with these people? Why isn’t he getting any heat for his friendships with them? Why isn’t he being held accountable for what they’ve done and said? Oh right, because he’s not a white fave. So people don’t care one way or the other, which brings me to my next point. 

I can guarantee you that if Sebastian’s gf or Paul or this co-founder were not associated with Sebastian in any way, nobody would give a shit about her wearing a kimono, about Paul doing black face, or about the co-founder/organization being blue lives matter supporters and in that lies the actual problem. Being critical of people and their actions should be consistent and should happen all the time -- not just when they interact with your white fave. That’s when it becomes performative and looks like you just want to be able to show internet people that you follow/support/stan unproblematic celebrities, when really, you don’t care.

I think the moral of this post is that I think it's unfair to hold a complete stranger to a standard that I cannot hold myself to. I also don't view celebrities the way most teenagers/twenty somethings do, and that’s because when I entered fandom we didn't have social media, so I grew up with a wall between myself and said celebrities. There is no wall now with the presence of social media. "Fans" nowadays have a weird ownership feeling over celebrities because they can read their personal thoughts or view personal pictures and think that they have this personal quasi-friendship with them. I can't get on board with that. I prefer having the wall and I still keep the wall.

If supporting Sebastian makes you uncomfortable, then by all means, stop supporting him. Just make sure you are making this decision for yourself based on credible sources and concrete evidence and that you're not letting this fake woke activist mob make you feel uncomfortable. Internet activism means nothing unless you put your money where your mouth is in your real life and 90% of the social justice internet warriors do not. Real activism is bigger than changing your avi to a black square.

[hologramcowboy]

I swear what is up with male celebs dating the most problematic people. First Henry Cavill (which doesn’t surprise me because of his own comments he’s made), then Sebastian Stan (apparently he’s not dating her and is allegedly dating Annabelle Wallis now) Chris Evans, and now Dylan O’Brien. It seems like it’s a pattern for celebs to date someone who seems like a really cool person only to be exposed as either racist, homophobic, misogynistic, or fatphobic. And sometimes the person is all 4.

I honestly never had any problems with who any celeb dates and when I would see who it is, I would just be like “oh they’re so pretty” and “oh they seem pretty cool” and “I’m so happy for them” just for it come out a day later that they aren’t a decent person. Literally not being racist, homophobic, and etc.. is not that hard and is quite literally the bare minimum. It does not take that much to be a decent person. And i get those tweets are old, but everyone should know back in 2012 or 2013 or 2018 that saying a racial slur is wrong and it doesn’t matter if you were a teenager or a young adult, you should know better. And all of sudden deleting the tweets and blocking comments doesn’t necessarily mean you know better now, it just seems like you didn’t want to get caught and be held accountable. Either way, if they want to date those type of people then that’s their prerogative, but don’t expect that people will still look at you the same way. I honestly wonder what goes through their pr teams heads?

I am out of the loop on this one, has Henry's gf made other racist moves? If so 🤢🤢🤢 I hope he dumps her fast. Also, he's no stranger to stupid comments and failing to react in the face of racism and discrimination, sadly. It's why I'd rather avoid running into my idols, it's so much better to appreciate from a distance than find out celebs you love are racist, homophobic, mean, etc.

Celebs focus on image so, they are looking for perfect optics and tend to be quite shallow. So it's no surprise to me when their partners turn out to be shaddy. The thing is, if your partner is a racist but you want to claim you are not, I won't believe you because in supporting your racist girlfriend you are supporting racism so you are, in fact, a racist. People need to start taking responsability for their views. Did Henry date racist women? Yes. Therefore, clearly being inclusive isn't at the top of his values otherwise he could have never gone for a partner that has a racist mentality AND he has a history of this by now. So, while I admire his work and look, I question his views.

As for Dylan, his girlfriend seems extremely, how should I put this...lacking in neurons? My point is, I think, in her stupidity, she thought she was being cool by appropriating the n word. Which is beyond absurd. The lack of cultural awareness and empathy is quite sad. Ignorance should never be an excuse in these situations. It's why I hope that Cultural Sensitivity will be taught everywhere, because we all come from different backgrounds and cultures and we may have limitations imposed by our programming so it's important to learn about cultural differences and how to honor and celebrate them.

I question Jensen the same way due to Danneel, she was a bully in her early twitter years and also on the red carpet (see her maxim event interview where she disses bai ling) and she is truly questionable as a human, she tries to hide it through fake activism but high quality people won't buy that because they know those who truly value activism get involved on deep levels while she isn't even able to hold a coherent discouse about the causes she supposedly "supports". She also deleted her whitewashing of MLK when people pointed out that she shouldn't teach her children to white wash. Instead of using that opportunity to create a discourse and bring awareness to a highly important topic and give the people in the know a voice, she deleted their comments and then finally deleted the post. She then proceeded to call them "bullies" during a live she supposedly held to show she was an ally...I think that speaks volumes. Then there are the numerous lies from where she went to college, to how she got work, to pageant participation, to many, many more. Her character truly makes me question the real nature of Jensen Ackles' personality, because she contradicts everything he claims to stand for.

[defying-gravityfalls]

Here we are, 10 years later

Hey folks. It's been a while. I really wanted to have something to post in time for the anniversary but I've gotten held up and was unable to make anything in time for the date. We are however on 618 today! So I'll take what I can get lol.

You may have noticed this account has been pretty barren the last couple years, and it's not hard to guess that is because I had moved on, I have fallen into other hyperfixations, and I'm also an adult now with more responsibilities than I had when I was running this account as a teenager. I almost have some sort of guilt from leaving this behind and even wonder if anyone still cares about what's on here, which is part of the reason I haven't posted much. But I'm feeling nostalgic and I want to talk about Gravity Falls and this is the perfect place to do it! So I thought I'd give you all an update on what I have going on and how I've circled back here.

Let me just start off by saying I'm sorry for falling through on a giveaway I had promised right before I had left this account, I still feel bad about it, I was at a real low point in life and should have never promised something I felt I could not follow through on. I didn't know what else to do except run away from it. But I'm better now, and to anyone who is still upset at me over this I encourage you to contact me for a free commission of your choice, because I'm actually serious about art now! (Seriously you have no idea how bad I feel about this I am so so sorry yall)

I have had one major hyperfixation since my GF one faded, and that would be Hatchetfield. I guess I'm just drawn to small towns where weird things happen! In the same way GF changed my life, Hatchetfield also has, I would not be where I am today without either of them. And if you also like Hatchetfield I have side account if you wanna check it out! This is definitely where I'm most active these days. I actually have a fic for it with a premise which many times has been compared to Bipper, and yes I do think that is an accurate callout lol

I've also gotten into The Owl House quite a bit lately, I wasn't too into it when it first started airing like I was with GF but once season 2 hit I started watching pretty regularly, and I'm sure many of you also watch it because of Dana. I'm definitely not as into it as I was with GF but I'm having a good time! A thing doesn't have to take over my life to be good lol.

On a personal note I have moved back to Minnesota! I'm currently a waitress trying to save up enough money for an apartment, I haven't finished college yet but now instead of animation/writing I'm hoping to get/finish my degree in theatre with a focus on costuming and SFX makeup. While I still love animation and could see it as something I would like to be a part of, theatre just seems more realistic to me at this point, and I like it and am already kinda good at it! I've always done theatre, this makes sense for me.

Back to why I came here. With all the hype recently leading up to the 10th anniversary I have been missing Gravity Falls, and I have been missing the community, and I want to get involved again. I don't think I ever truly left Gravity Falls behind, it stayed with me one way or the other, having this presence in my life I couldn't deny, and I think I want to come back home to it. My life has changed a lot the past 10 years, i wanna look back on something that made me so happy.

So I'm gonna try to be more active on this blog! I'm gonna start a long overdue rewatch on the series and maybe liveblog some parts of it. I think that's a good starting point. I'm happy to be back, and I hope I maybe still have friends here after being absent for a few years, and I'm willing to make new ones too. Thank you everybody, for everything. Stay weird.

[a-quiet-borderline-diary]

I wonder if she ever thinks about our first love together. I am drawn to stories about young people falling in love with their same sex best friend because that was my first love story.

I find myself romanticizing the idea of falling in love with a best friend, and then experiencing much of the romance secretly, but in plain sight. We were in the closet for a long time, even from friends. We told everyone we were just "best friends"... But after school we would go to one of our rooms and pretend to be studying or playing video games and we would just be caressing eachother so fucking tenderly. The whole thing was just full of angst. Eventually when I came out to my parents, it pretty much sent my life crashing. It changed everything.

Things were no longer able to be simple. We couldn't just be teenagers secretly in love. All of the sudden, I was forced to live independently as an adult. No more parents to help me, and my gf at the time didn't step up to support me. I had to beg her to get a part time job, while I worked a full-time job I hated to keep a roof over our heads. When I would ask her for more money (because I covered all the bills) she would get upset because having to spend all of the money she made working made her "not want to work at all" and she would say she should just move back in with her grandma so I didn't have to pay to feed her. I wanted her to be my savior. I wanted her to become my protector, and my rock because I lost my family all for her. She failed me. I had a new platonic best friend, but he was a boy. He loved me so unconditionally. Even though he thought we would never be romantic together, he became so fond of me that he would do anything for me.

I fell in love with my best friend once again, but it wasn't (as) queer this time. (both of us do identify as nonbinary he/them and she/them, but we present pretty hetero normative). I guess it wasn't as exciting as being a teenager, but he made me feel loved as an adult. My first love only had the capacity to love me as teenagers... It's as if she was not ready to grow up with me. We were the same age, but I was forced to grow up and she chose clinging to her childhood instead of stepping up when the going got rough to take care of me.

The best friend I left her for gives me everything he can. He has still hurt me, and he isn't perfect... But I can tell that he not only loves me but would give me anything he could give to make me happy and safe. He knows self defence and he would kill someone for me if he had to. My ex made me feel like I needed to do everything for HER, even though I felt like the one that needed to be protected and cared for.

It's such a shame that love is not enough. My ex still hates me for leaving her... But I wonder if she even sees how she failed me. I was depending on her and all she could do was depend on me. It was too much...

I can't help but daydream about being 17 and being in love with my best friend, though. Sitting at the lunch table with friends, and being questioned about being together because we would accidentally do something a little too intimate. We would look into each other's eyes just a little too long. We made mix tapes for eachother and hung out every day after school. We really lived the teenage dream.

High school love doesn't tend to last forever though, and for me it was because we weren't both ready to become adults at the same time. Even so, I look back fondly at those memories and I feel my first love shaped me into the person I am today

[bittybattybunny]

OKAY so here’s the cursed into a dragon story and doodle!!

I wanted to draw the cute knight and the dragon (AKA Ru had an old suit of armor at his brother’s and had no idea the dragon he was asked about was his not GF)

Fic time!! and reminder this idea was suggested by @creepyfuzzymelon​!! It did get a lil long for a ficlet but eh it works! Enjoy!

She paused in front of the red door and brushed her hair behind her ear before she walked in. She sneezed as she walked in, the smell of incense making her nose burn. She frowned as her head began to spin.

“Welcome.” Came the shop keeper’s sing song voice. Her green blue eyes twinkled with mischief as she saw the woman.

“Hello.” Eclipse gave a smile but she wanted to leave. Not wishing to be rude she decided to walk around some before she ran from the over scented store. She looked at the cluttered shop shelves and her eyes landed on an ornate dragon mask. She frowned looking at it. She picked it up and turned it around curiously. There was writing in the back. She squinted trying to read it.

“It says to the wearer their heart will become fierce until the knight calms it.” 

Eclipse jolted, having not even noticed the woman sneaking up behind her. She felt a cold chill as she looked at the woman’s smile as she chuckled.

“Don’t be so skittish dear.” she cooed and took the mask in her hands. Eclipse watched as she spun it around in her hands, producing a ribbon from the air and tying it on. “I wonder what form you would take?”

Eclipse could only gasp as the mask was shoved on her face and she was thrown from the shop.

She blinked a few times. She reached to remove the mask but it wouldn’t come off. In fact the more she tried the firmer it seemed to stick. She struggled and pulled. She felt a burning sensation starting to grow in her chest. She clawed and shoved at the mask. Her body began to contort as she feverishly tried to get the mask off. She gasped as her face felt the cold chill. She grit her teeth as she felt her face ripping at its own seams. Fangs jutting. She roared as her bones grew and rearranged, horns shoving through her skull as she fell to all fours. She clawed the cobblestone sidewalks of the small village as her clothing fell in shreds.

Wisps began to light up as black scales began to grow and cover her body as her newly formed tail lashed around. Large wings caught between bird and moth spread as she panted and slowly the burning subsided. She collapsed on the stone. Her head was heavy. She sighed.

“Way to go Moony. You walked into that one.” she groaned as she lifted her head to look herself over. She lifted a hand and looked at the claws and whined.

“Great.” she moved to stand. At least a dragon was similar in limbs to a wolf so she had that going for her. The wings were a new feature. She lifted one to inspect it and looked around. She had entered the shop in the downtown of Subcon City but. 

Small buildings with no life surrounded the dragon-woman as she walked around. She raised her head to look at the rising moon and huffed. She turned to inspect for her bag among the remains of her clothes but couldn’t find it.

“Guess no phone calls.” she flicked her forked tongue as she jumped on top of one of the buildings. She narrowed her eyes as she saw a church and decided to get a better view.

A wind blew as she climbed up to the steeple and looked over the rolling fields.

She looked at the sky and sighed, “Fierce until the night calms it huh?” she shook her head side to side. “Hopefully this mask comes off soon then.”  she ran off, deciding to enjoy the empty fields in the meanwhile.

------

“A dragon?” Snatcher asked as Kaya gave a frown. She scratched her cheek as he stood in her office.

“Yeah. reports of one in the old ruins of Tir na Nocht.” she sighed, “I put SO MANY BARRIERS!” she puffed her cheek annoyed, “I tried to make sure NOTHING would get into Ti Na Nocht when i left!” she fumed, “And this dragon comes WALTZING IN LIKE SHE OWNS IT!” she stomped her foot, “The worst bit is NO ONE CAN GET NEAR!”

“So what does that have to do with me?” he raised a brow, “You know I’m busy watching the kid since Eclipse is working a job.”

“See that’s the thing!” she frowned, “I thought she was home! I was going to ask HER to do this! She’s fought dragons before! And I would ask Jacob since he’s a dragonborn, but he went off on another mission last week with Maki and Tiffny to deal with an issue in the elvish kingdom.” she rubbed her neck. 

“Why don’t you go?”

“Didn’t you hear me?” she scoffed, “NO ONE can get near!” She groaned and winced as she rolled her sleeves up, revealing bandages all over her arms. “I already TRIED and that bitch roasted me with wisps!” She whined, “And even my healing takes a bit when it’s soul fire.” she sighed, “it’s made to chew up magic in the first palace after all.”

His eyes widened as he looked. He hadn’t ever thought the Solaria Umbra could even be harmed, much less burned. He frowned, “So why me? I’m less resistant than you are.”

“You have a blessing of attraction. It should work on the dragon. If not throw this down.” she handed him a glass orb, “it’ll instantly send you back here.” she explained. “If you’re worried, I saw some Solgarian armor at your brother’s when I was visiting, you could wear that!” she teased, “a knight in shining armor!”

He thought about it and sighed, “Yeah, let’s do that then. Let me just text Cookie see if she can watch Hattie.”

“Oh, right the kid. I’d say i can watch but I need to drop you off, if it takes a bit I can get her from school even if my arms are bacon.” she snickered, “Since I am the one asking you to do this for me.” she moved around the desk and began to shift the shadows. Snatcher sighed and walked over as she used them to send them to the woods.

Marcus jumped as the two appeared on the porch. His potion flying from his hands. Kaya reached to catch it and screeched as it landed on her burned hands and then the floor. Marcus stared at the ruined mix and brushed his hair back annoyed.

“Yes?” he asked, hands on his hips as his tail wisped.

Kata frowned, “Can we take that Solgarian armor?” she asked, “I’m sending your brother to calm and agitated dragon down.”

“Ru? To a dragon?” Marcus deadpanned and rolled his eyes, “Sure I guess.”

“Sweet.” She moved the book shelf to head into the storage room. She grabbed the golden armor with a snicker, “Did you know my dad’s armor actually does have a similar look?” she asked.

“Does it?” Marcus floated over, “Interesting. But it makes sense. Father wanted his approval more than anything.”

Kaya snorted and chewed her lip.

“What?” Snatcher asked taking the suit.

“My dad LOATHES your dad,” she admitted as the two former princes stared.

She laughed loudly, “My dad thinks your dad is a fucking piece of shit who doesn’t deserve his bloodline!” she wheezed. She adjusted her bandages, “I mean he picked a fight with ME!” she snickered, “and my dad is a god of UNION not war.” she pointed out.

Snatcher snickered as he started to pull the armor on. “Yeah sounds right.”

“I pecking LOVE that fact!” Marcus cackled. He looked, “wow you still fit in that.”

“Huh?” Kaya blinked.

Snatcher adjusted the armor and looked around, “my sword should be here isn’t it?”

“Wait--” Kaya’s mouth dropped.

“Yeah I have it upstairs though on the wall display.” Marcus explained.

Kaya looked between them confused.

“Oh, cool. That’s easy.” Snatcher looked around, “is my scabbard around too?”

“Should be upstairs as well.”

“WAIT!” Kaya gasped getting their attention. She frowned, “are you saying that’s YOUR armor??? Not random?”

“Yes? It’s a little tighter but, this was when i used to train with the guards. I wasn’t about to get hurt. Estelle kept it here at the cabin after I was engaged as I didn’t fight anymore. Same with my sword.” Snatcher laughed at the teenager who shook her head and scoffed. He sneered, “What did you think I was a laze about?”

“N-No I just thought you were all books! The whole lawyer thing!” she admitted.

“I had no magic, of course I did something to protect myself!” He cackled.

Marcus snickered, “I can fight with a bow and arrow you know.”

She turned red and huffed, “well, I knew that one, i let you use my archery range.” she scowled, “L-Look let’s just get this dragon dealt with! I don’t want it to get more annoying!”

“Right.” Snatcher scowled.

“Kaya…” he stated as she looked at him.

“You said you thought Eclipse was home?” he asked, he’d thought on it for a bit but not too much, “I thought she was working. She had left and said she’d be out of cell service.”

“I called her phone and it said she was home.” she admitted with a frown, “I’ll look into it. Maybe she’s a frog again?” she suggested.

He frowned and nodded. “Please.” he scowled as he pulled his hair from his face, “let’s go get my sword and head off then.” His stomach flipped.

-----

Her claws traced the rocks as she snarled. It’d been a few days and she was starving. Nothing lived in the area that she could hunt. Her eyes narrowed as she felt someone getting near HER territory. She slunk across the grounds. Tail lashed around as she sniffed. She smelt that annoying twig that’d entered her territory a day before. But there was a new one. Sweet. Salty. She liked it. She licked her jaws as she growled.

“So a giant black dragon with weird wings?” he stated with a frown. He sighed as he looked at the barrier and stepped inside the area. Instantly he felt eyes on him. He frowned and reached for the hilt of his sword. He saw a flash of blue and held a hand up, the wisp nudging him. He chuckled. He frowned. His eyes grew wide.

Wisps.

He turned to where he felt the eyes and began to run towards it.

The dragon blinked in shock as the man came barreling at her. She reared up in her surprise and he looked up as she emerged from the grasses. He sighed.

“Guess I don’t need Kaya to look that up.” he reached his hands up.

The dragon whined and lowered her head. She nuzzled against him, chirping.

“What did you do you silly woman,” he asked as the dragon licked him. He snickered as he pet her muzzle. She purred as he rolled his eyes. He kissed the front of her nose and she huffed a small flame.

He frowned, “well. That didn’t work.” he scowled. A kiss didn’t work. He gasped when she pushed her head against him and he laughed as he reached at her horns. He frowned as he noticed an odd line of scales.

“Eclipse…” he frowned.

She blinked. Eclipse. Was that her? Her eyes flickered.

“Eclipse?” he asked a bit more forcefully. Her head hurt. She whined and pulled away from him.

He huffed and put his hands on his hips. She looked at the knight and growled. He made her head hurt.

“Eclipse show me your head again.” he ordered.

She shook her head and sat definitely. He glared and she lowered her head with a small huff of flames escaping her lips. He walked along and reached that odd line of scales. He frowned as his fingers traced it. It felt like an edge. He scowled and gripped it. The dragon lurched. He held tightly. He wrapped an arm around one of her horns as he gripped the edge. As he held it, it seemed to lift. He grit his teeth as she bucked and shook her head. She roared and growled as he continued to work on the edge, the scaling pulling up. He gasped as there was a spark of blue flame and the dragon collapsed to the ground. He winced as he hit the earth when she slammed into it in her collapse. 

He pulled and slowly, her body shrank. The scales vanished, the sound of snapping bones as her body reworked to human form. He shifted her to his lap as he pulled the mask fully off. She laid unconscious on his lap. He sighed and looked at the mask in his hands. He lit it up in blue flames, the mask crackling as it burned to ash.

Shaking the remains from his hand and focused back on Eclipse. He brushed her hair from her face as her ragged breathing grew more steady. He felt his cheeks grow red as he realized she was naked.

Her eyes fluttered open slowly. She looked up at him.

“Snatcher?” she asked softly. She groaned and moved to sit, falling against him. He gasped moving to steady her.

“Careful… you just were a huge ass dragon.” he snickered.

She whined and buried her face against his shoulder. He sighed and shifted to carry her. He felt her cling onto him and he was doing he best to not think about the fact he was carrying a naked woman with whom he had affections for. He felt his face heat up as he left the barrier.

Kaya stared in confusion. She stared with all four eyes and sighed heavily. She removed her over coat as she winced, handing it over to him.

“Thanks.” he used it to wrap Eclipse up.

“Of course she was the one to burn the shit out of my arms.” the demoness grumbled, “sooo any ideas?”

“A mask. A dragon mask. I burned it.” He scowled, “she didn’t seem to have any recognition.”

“What did it look like?” she asked with a huff. She looked at Eclipse with a scowl.

“Dark black, had a red ribbon on the back, had gold scales on it with ruby inlaid eyes.” he explained, “it was fused to her face.”

“To my love, may your heart grow fierce until your knight can calm it.” Kaya recited with a sigh and rubbed her neck with a groan, “An engagement mask from the dragon king. How odd. There shouldn’t be one in this realm…” She scowled as her fingers tapped her chin, “there’s no Dragon king in this reality so why would one of his engagement masks be here…” she sighed, “well I’m glad you got it off her. If she had it on too long, she’d have been a dragon forever.”

Snatcher scowled. He smiled softly as she moved some more in his arms. She looked up at him tiredly.

“How you feeling?” he asked.

“Hungry.” she admitted with a frown, “tired… sore… where am I?”

“Near the ruins of Tir-na-Nocht.” he explained, “you were a big dragon.”

“Was I?” she frowned as she shifted how she was in his arms. She squeaked and pulled Kaya’s coat close as she realized she was naked. She groaned and rested against Snatcher, “I don’t remember… I just remember I was in some weird shop and some lady shoved something on my face then it gets blurry. I smelt something really sweet and I just wanted to be near it.”

Snatcher felt his heart race, “O-Oh?”

“It was like… calming. I felt calm so I wanted it. Then I remember pain and I’m just so hungry.” she sighed as she closed her eyes.

“Sho--- OH GODS DAMNIT!” Kaya slapped her face and whined as she hit her own burns, “Red door? Smells HORRIBLE?”

“Yes?” Eclipse turned to look at the demoness who had pulled her phone out and was angrily texting.

“Clockwork Rose” she explained, “I bet you met Belle. She’s finicky like a cat. Says she likes to help people but I swear she makes more messes than not! Stupid interdimensional space witch!” she huffed, “I prefer Briar to her cuz at least Briar only messes with shit in her own territory but nooo Belle makes paperwork EVEYWHEREEE.” she hissed and hit send with a sigh, “Seems you must have been her plaything.

Snatcher froze, “Does she have red hair, like a bright red?” he paled.

“She does.” Kaya admitted, “and eyes that are either green or blue, like gemstones.”

“I-I’ve been in her shop,” he admitted. “She gave me a weird locket! It burnt Eclipse’s hand and made me hear her heartbeat.”

“It made you hear what?!” the woman gasped, red in the face. “I-I remember the locket a few months ago b-but!”

He nodded, “Yeah, it had a weird side effect. I don’t know why.” he sighed.

Kaya frowned as she thought about it and sighed, “let’s go home. I have enough work to do, more so knowing this crosses into spacial law. Damnit I wanted to watch a new episode of Calimari Stage.” she opened a portal and waited for them to enter. She looked back at the fields that were once her home and frowned.

She raised a hand and reached out.

“Kaya?” Snatcher called.

She pulled her hand and looked back. She gave a small smile. She ran towards the portal and shoved them through. Wincing at her burns.

A wisp danced beyond the barrier, giggling before vanishing.

[holdinghandswithastatue]

my thoughts on the lorien legacies reborn series [spoilers]

i think it sucked

sorry

i loved most of the characters to bits and they all deserved better (in terms of characterisation, plot)

nigel. oh my god nigel i love him so much

ran takeda deserved SO MUCH BETTER im still mad

the way they hinted at a whole bunch of romances but only made the one i dont give a shit about canon

i really really hate white girl taylor cook

yes, having a white american girl as the main character IS diversity :))))))

isabela is cool as shit and i wish i was her

i love their fleshed out backstories but i wish i couldve heard more

THERE WAS LITERALLY NO DEVELOPMENT IN MOST OF THEM (personally i think the series was cut short bc they all had so much more room to grow)

(it gave off percy jackson movies energy)

it hurts me how the writing hinted that nigel would get his heroic moment but he literally never did 

and then nigel was left with what? his only best friend dead, his parents corrupt assholes and him still not having healed from his trauma- still the underdog

ALSO: NIGEL WAS THE ONLY CANONICALLY GAY CHARACTER (except for maybe daunphen but still that doesnt really count bc its only implied) but they just like. didnt give him a love interest. 

nic was literally right there- that homoerotic moment really hit me and i just read it over and over

ran’s death was really well done but also COMPLETELY PREVENTABLE

if isabela had just told einar to stfu and shoot lucas it wouldve all been over and ran and five would still be alive 

speaking of which, ran and five were a super cute couple/friendship i cant tell but i like their dynamic a lot

five saying that he “actually likes” ran is essentially a confession of love in his terms

caleb. i liked him. but he was so boring and straight. i think his development wouldve been great if they just DID SOMETHING WITH HIM

also idk whether to ship isabela with caleb or daunphen but personally i like to think of daunphen as trixic which is unrelated

caleb literally. had potential. troubled home life. not as bad as the others but he never really stopped being an uptight little bitch

if he had, i think he wouldve been great

I LOVED EINAR’S GROUP’S DYNAMIC

do they have a name? i feel like they do but i cant remember

like... what a mix of characters, i love how they work together

personally i think theyre just the gay friend group

on the topic of einar,

i KNOW i shouldnt love him the way i do but if you didnt want me to love him you SHOULDNT HAVE GIVEN HIM REDEEMING QUALITIES

(same with five)

literally einar’s final monologue hurt me so much even though he nearly did drown nigel in gen 1 but still

“will you- will you finally listen?” yea kill me now 

i really hated how they brought the villain in in the final book. the fuck. who even gives a shit about lucas. no one remembers him

also it feels slightly political to make the main villain a radical christian who wants to convert the earth garde by killing them

listen i could talk about einar all day

i think he and isabela were a great friendship... of sorts

i mean did einar ever really let anyone close enough to him to make friends

but hes just so... S O F T

no hes not 

but he is to me 

ew

kopano really deserved a better gf than taylor

god 

also i wanted to see more of miki

again i will reiterate i think nic and nigel wouldve made a great couple

i keep forgetting theyre all just teenagers and thats kinda painful

einar was just a kid bro 

SO MUCH NUANCE TO HIS CHARACTER THAT WAS NOT EXPLORED

so much potential

hmm am i forgetting anyone?

lets talk about john smith

that man has a hero complex and its really annoying and part of me is really glad he wasnt the one to save the day this time but also i didnt want ran to die so

i think it wouldve been fitting if einar just ended it all since he kinda started the whole fiasco

fuck bea barnaby and her homophobic (and also mass-murdering) ass

the john and marina thing shouldve been forgotten completely no one ships them pls 

they had their one true loves just let them be without an s/o thanks

ella deserved to have more screen (? its a book) time bc she was my favourite character in the original series

OH MY GOD I HAVENT TALKED ABOUT NINE YET

hes the loml

also the part where lucas (in the body of john) rips off his cybernetic arm really hurt me

i kinda wish taylor died instead of ran

kill off the heroic white girl instead: the fifth wave style

john is such a stupid selfish bastard honestly but having a hero complex a valid flaw but still. i cannot deal with his bullshit all the time

writing one line on john and nine reuniting was cruel when you know most of the fandom ships them

also i like einar’s softening up near the end, and treating the group like they were his actual friends 

i wish we couldve seen more of them

i love myself a found family ragtag group situation

even though 2 of them died 

and the other has an inhibitor in his head, gets shocked every 3 minutes and took the fall for everyone

AS HE SHOULD THOUGH, MOST OF IT IS HIS FAULT

but hes just a kid

my thoughts are so scattered

omg stop i think i relate to einar... no..... not the literal mass murderer “terrorist” psychopath

he’s uptight and always needing to be in control

but he feels the pressure of having to be perfect to everyone else, and thus falls apart on the inside

gosh i wish i didnt love einar the way i do

final thoughts (but i’ll probably add even more): ran :’( nigel :( taylor >:( caleb :| einar :’( isabela >:) daunphen :D john :|

i hope no one reads this