#am i allowed to tag this with the mechanisms? I'm doing it

[goodmorninginspectorlyf]

My favorite Jessica Law songs in vaguely chronological order:

The Innocents

The Littlest Libertine

Bedrock

Hollow Lines

Every song on Languid Little Lies (Which I shall now rank:

Lotus Eaters

Jekyll & Hyde 4eva

Mermaid's Revenge

Dagon Lake

Cruel to be Cruel

Narcissus Under the Knife)

Death Insurance

No Damage

Nice vs Kind

Find Me in Hell

Dayglo Dinosaur

Sirens II

Raising the Dead!

Vermillion Sands

Song for Joshua Hayward

Every song on Ghostwatching (Which I shall also rank (was hard the whole album's good))

Context

Monday Morning

Unconventional

Ghostwatching

Angels Have a Thousand Eyes

Too Late Turning

Give us Time

Broken Spoke

No Such Thing as Magic

The Hill

This is Not a Place of Honour

Life After Afterlife)

Oops that's like half her discography.

[astonmartinii]

match my freak | yuki tsunoda social media au

pairing: yuki tsunoda x fem rugby player reader

there's only one person who can match the yuki tsunoda radio freak...

MAIN MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

.・゜゜・ part of the aston martini summer olympics ・゜゜・．

yukitsunoda0511

liked by pierregasly, danielricciardo and 384,098 others

tagged: yourusername

yukitsunoda0511: spa was fine i guess, time to spend my summer break in france (ew) supporting the love of my life (yay)

view all comments

user1: 'fine i guess' as if we didn't get YOINTS

user2: tbf if my gf looked like that, points also wouldn't matter to me

pierregasly: FRANCE (EW)??? DID OUR HOMOEROTIC TENSION MEAN NOTHING???

yukitsunoda0511: oh so when i diss france we had homoerotic tension but when i said we were boyfriends i went too far 🤨

pierregasly: diss me all you want but not the homeland?

yukitsunoda0511: fine, i will from 5pm tomorrow

pierregasly: ???

yukitsunoda0511: because y/n will be there and therefore it will be the ONLY country in existence

pierregasly: i give up

user3: i need a man this down bad for me asap

user4: maybe it's time to lower my height requirements :(

yourusername: it's not how tall you are but how you are tall

user5: idk what the fuck that means

yourusername: IT MEANS SHORT KINGS PUT IN A LOT OF EFFORT WHY DO I HAVE TO SPELL OUT EVERYTHING? WHERE IS THE MEDIA LITERACY? THE READ COMPREHENSION?

user6: okay i think i now know ^^ why y/n and yuki are so good together

user7: i need someone to edit together their most iconic on field and radio moments together please for my mental health

yourusername: that's a crazy coincidence because the love of MY life will also be in paris 🤨

yukitsunoda0511: well i bet i love my love of my life more than you love your love of your life

yourusername: NUH UH

yukitsunoda0511: yep :PPPPPPP

yourusername: u wanna fight?

yukitsunoda0511: yes actually!

yourusername: well soz babe i can't get all hot and bothered before competing 🤷‍♀️

yukitsunoda0511: BORING

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, pierregasly and 318,905 others

tagged: yukitsunoda

yourusername: seeing yuki again: 10/10 ... realising he's not allowed in the olympic village and there's only cardboard beds anyway -100,000/10

view all comments

user12: so i suddenly understand why they give out so many condoms at the olympics

user13: why do they all go so feral?

yourusername: have you seen my man?

yourusername: AND THAT'S A RHETORICAL QUESTION TO SHOW OFF MY HANDSOME LITTLE MAN NOT AN INVITATION FOR YOU BITCHES TO THIRST

user14: noted 😔

pierregasly: i'm the one with a bad digital footprint but you're out here being just as horny as me on main

yourusername: i am allowed to ?

pierregasly: and i'm not allowed to?

yourusername: no

pierregasly: so fuck me i guess?

yourusername: let me be a woman in a male dominated field (being gross online)

yukitsunoda0511: yeah pierre stop trying to minimise womens' voices

pierregasly: how am i the bad guy again?

yourusername: man ❤️

pierregasly: yuki is a man?

yourusername: he's MY man which means he's been closely vetted and is basically one of the girls now

user14: i know visa cashapp rb or whatever the fuck they're called hate to see them coming

user15: it's the fact she's taller than most of the mechanics and she is always watching over them

yukitsunoda0511: i missed you so much but i can't wait to watch you beat the shit out of the competition

yourusername: for you, anything

yukitsunoda0511: a gold? so at least one of us can be world champion 🥺

yourusername: i'll win gold for you and then schedule in a friendly visit to see helmut

yukitsunoda0511: i think your mere presence could give him a heart attack

yourusername: oh well

user16: so real of her

olympics

liked by yukitsunoda0511, landonorris and 1,209,678 others

tagged: newzealandrubgy

olympics: the women's rugby final saw gold go home to new zealand!

view all comments

user17: okay yuki i am SEEING THE VISION

user18: i watched this game to see her and i am a changed woman

user19: i am no better than a man

danielricciardo: my personal favourite moment was when y/n clotheslined that poor girl, laughed in her face and said if she tried to get past her again she'd make trinket dishes out of her knee caps

yourusername: why thank you, i think my wit is my least appreciated part of my game

danielricciardo: i think we should honestly get you in the commentary box

yourusername: i'd make mince meat of crofty, he'd never say anything about yuki's radios again

danielricciardo: can you tell them to stop telling me to retire while you're at it?

yourusername: sure, i'm feeling generous

danielricciardo: a gold medal will do that to you

user20: so they weren't joking when they said that her and yuki are just the same person in different fonts ?

user21: my commentary team apologised about 20 times for her swearing on the broadcast but then they kept bursting out laughing whenever she said anything

yukitsunoda0511: HOLY FUCKING SHIT

yukitsunoda0511: GOAT GOAT GOAT MY GIRLFRIEND IS THE GOAT

yukitsunoda0511: i'm so proud, i love you y/n 🫶🏻🥹❤️‍🩹

yourusername: i love you too boo

yukitsunoda0511: can they let me in the room now? i'm getting withdrawal symptoms :(

yourusername: of course, i can't celebrate properly without you

yukitsunoda0511: 😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄😄

user22: picturing yuki waiting outside the team room is so cute

user23: the nz team instagram posted a pic of it on their story he had flowers and balloons (∩˃o˂∩)♡

yukitsunoda0511

liked by pierregasly, maxverstappen1 and 893,401 others

tagged: yourusername

yukitsunoda0511: she matches my freak :)

view all comments

user25: oh believe me we know

user26: i'm like a confusing mix of scared AND turned on

yukitsunoda0511: you keep that to yourself

user27: okay sir 🤨

yukitsunoda0511: you can look but you can't touch :P

yukitsunoda0511: actually don't even look

yukitsunoda0511: don't even think about her ( ｡ •�� ᴖ •́ ｡)

user28: this man is insane, i love him

yourusername: you LIKE HIM YOU APPRECIATE HIM FROM AFAR YOU MAYBE HAVE A PARASOCIAL RELATIONSHIP YOU DON'T LOVE HIM THAT'S FOR ME AND ME ONLY

user29: oh they weren't joking about matching each other's freaks

yourusername: there's no one else i'd like to be a lil gremlin with :3

yukitsunoda0511: gremlins forever with you <3

yourusername: sounds like paradise to me !!

yukitsunoda0511: i'm on it ✍🏻

user30: is he going to propose ???

user31: hopefully (ㅅ •᷄ ₃•᷅ )

pierregasly: yeah i guess you guys are kinda cute

yukitsunoda0511: kINDA?

yourusername: i know this man ain't speaking on us

yourusername: kika is the face economy in that relationship

yourusername: her back must hurt from carrying the style in this couple

francisca.cgomez: well 🥹

pierregasly: WHAT ? HOW ?

yukitsunoda0511: don't call my girlfriend kinda cute then 🤨

user32: good lord

fin.

note: she's back !!!!!

[xclowniex]

Re a post going around about someone's feelings towards the Palestinian flag and them working on it and getting unfairly dunked on (forgot who made it but please tag them if you know who):

What I'm going to say is going to be controversial to a certain crowd.

It is not abnormal for jews, both in Israel and the diaspora to have gut reactions to the Palestinian flag. This is not because of Palestinians and is literally psychology.

For Israeli jews, they get attacked by Hamas. They have to run to bomb shelters, hide and hope that they or any of their loved ones don't get killed. So many Israelis either knew a victim of Oct 7th or knows someone who knew a victim. And Oct 7th wasn't the first tome Hamas or some other group has attacked Israel.

Whether you like it or not, Israelis are human beings. Regardless of the Israeli government's actions, Israelis are human beings. It is not abnormal for someone to develop a gut reaction to seeing the flag of a country where SOME people from that country have tried to kill you, regardless of what the government of your country has done.

For diaspora jews, we have seen so many people, often times people who are not Palestinian, weaponsize what is going on in Gaza to hurt us. And that fucking sucks for everyone. It sucks on the front that people are finding ways to excuse and justify their antisemitism, and it sucks on the front that people are weaponizing Palestinian suffering full stop.

I have been harassed by strangers who wear a Palestinian flag pin, who do not know my opinion but see that I'm Jewish and will walk up to me or past me and call me slurs and insult me. It has gotten to the point where I've almost been attacked.

Then you see online a 12 year old Jewish girl being raped. Jews being attacked for simply walking past a pro Palestine protest in Germany as they have a destination which requires them to walk past the protest. We see at counter protests how it's mainly the jews at these protests who get hurt and rarely pro Israel goyim.

You see all of that done by people who claim to support Palestinians and use their flag.

It is hard not to have a gut reaction.

I can imagine that it is the exact same, if not worse, for palestinians and the Israeli flag.

And the thing with all of this is, all of us are allowed to feel fear, anxiety, at seeing flags. It does not indicate that we hate the people from the countries those flags represent, or that we want them wiped out. It is a survival mechanism that our brains have learnt to keep us safe.

Where it matters is our actions and wants.

It is never okay to harm people for holding or wearing the Israeli or Palestine flag. It is never okay to want people dead because of the country they're born in. And that's where it really matters.

I and so many others on both sides actively work to get rid of this gut reaction. For me personally, I am grateful that I have a good foundation to start from in that I only get the gut reaction when a non Palestinian person wears, holds or has it in their bio. But it is okay if you're not there yet.

It is honestly disgusting to have this moral purity that you have to have started with no gut reaction and that working on it and changing doesn't matter. Because it does matter.

Calling whoever made that post a bad person for actively working to fix that gut reaction is wrong and doesn't do anything to help them improve.

[loudclan-clangen]

Hey there!

Checking out Loudclan? That's great! Thanks so much!

Loudclan was originally planned to be drawn as I played the game like most other clangen blogs... Then I got frustrated about how slow it was moving and played ahead. Just a little bit, nothing to worry about, only about 1000 moons. So this blog should be running for A WHILE. I also take pretty big liberties with the designs and events. I think it's more interesting that way! Also it's been several real life months since I started playing and some things I just... forgot. Or lost. Either way, it's fun to stretch my creative skills.

As for the mechanics of the blog:

General Content Warnings Include:

Death, Animal Death, (Cat Death specifically), Death in Childbirth, Violence, Murder, Illness, Gore, Grooming, Abuse, Bad Parenting, Cheating, Affairs, Drama, Cursing, Language, Dirty Jokes, ECT. (if i missed something please let me know)

Updates are not going to be on a consistent schedule... ever. I'm a college student. I just don't have the time or energy.

The style is going to vary wildly. It's been years since I've consistently drawn cats and I wasn't ever really happy with the way I did it back then anyway. Come along for the ride with me! I'm just as surprised by what my hands create as you guys!

Overview:

Loudclan is set in a fictional location that is based on South Central Alaska. A group of rogues fled up the mountains to get away from the deep snows of the valleys at the beginning of a particularly harsh winter. The clan follows three "Leaders" in the form of the Leader, the Lead Healer, and the Lead Mediator. These leaders will each pass their position on to their oldest heir, the closest related member of their direct family. Issues regarding what happens when two cats have similar claims have yet to be sorted out by the clan, and may never be fully decided... *insert mysterious foreshadowing sounds*

If you are interested in more of a deep dive into the lore check out this post: Lore, or anything tagged #loudclanlore .

Want to see a list of all of the Loudclan cats? Go here: Allegiances.

Asks are welcome! I will do my best to answer them quickly and efficiently! I am happy to talk about characters, art, process, gameplay, pretty much anything. (I probably won't be showing sprites though, just because I've played ahead so far and a not insignificant amount of them are just... gone. Lost to the ether. Sacrificed so that my laptop could keep running the game.) All asks are tagged #loudclanasks .

Also fanart/writing/edits are more than welcome! You guys are so cool and talented and I am honored that you would want to make something based on my dumb little pixel cats. Referencing or imitating my style/designs/layout is absolutely allowed, just make sure to mention me so I don't miss them! All fan contributions are tagged #loudclanfan .

I will never complain about anyone "blowing up my notifications" or spam liking. I think it's so neat to see people go through the blog liking as they go. Don't worry about it. I enjoy seeing you enjoy my work!

A little bit about me, you can call me "D"! I use any pronouns, I'm pretty ambivalent about them but the majority of people use she/her for me and I'm fine with that. I'm 20, I live most of the time in Alaska and part time on a ranch in Texas and I'm working on my BA in Elementary Education. I started reading Warriors in 2nd Grade and stopped in 6th Grade but the brain worms never die. If you know me in real life no you don't: It took me all of high school to kill the furry allegations I'm not going through that again. Oh, and my main blog is @restinginpiecesofpizza but warning, there's spoilers for Owlstar's family tree for like 8 generations posted on there.

If you think Loudclan's cool and want to help me out consider checking out my RedBubble!

Anyway, thanks for checking out my blog! I hope you enjoy!

[nectardaddy]

B.I.L.L.S , t. hanamaki

american hero. . . b.i.l.l.s. by towa bird

If I had a dollar then I wouldn't have to bother 'bout the bills. I'm so tired of paying rent.

pairing : hanamaki takahiro x f!reader

cw/notes : poverty/financial insecurity, conversation about/wishing for "what could be" (and a deep dive into the feeling of wanting), use of the pet name "sweetheart," humor as a coping mechanism, language, eating used as a metaphor, lots of metaphors in general, established long-term relationship, I am genuinely very proud of this fic so if you got tagged out of the blue that's why <3

word count : 2.6k

The apartment was dingy and run down, a muted tone of gray that submerged the entire cramped space into desolace. A desolace that bled into the other rooms, through the floorboards, through every nook and cranny of the compact unit - through the bones of the pair that inhabited it. Pictures and posters littered the drab walls. Old developed pictures and various music flyers stuck to drywall with bits and pieces of scotch tape - real frames were far too expensive - as they tried desperately to combat the dreary aura of the space. 

But it was difficult to fight against such longing; around every corner being yet another issue that would only ever be resolved with the one thing the pair didn’t have: funds. Air conditioning that went out every other month, as the landlord was too stingy to really fix it and complained with every call and maintenance request about the issue. Mold in the air vents, water pressure that was just short of a small stream, a lock on the door that barely bolted with a small chain lock that was used as a "replacement" that didn't really do anything. It reeked of dust and mildew, a musty smell that lingered no matter how many candles were lit and blown out. And trial and error to shut the, horribly painted, bedroom room; over the months they learned to turn the knob and slam rather than just slam. 

It was a constricted, at times uncomfortable; limited space meaning old cardboard boxes stayed within the living area or bedroom - mementos gathered dust that all but covered the unit entirely. Memories shoved in a box that would barely ever see the light of day, or simply, didn’t want to. Such a place didn’t deserve such warmth. A god forsaken space didn’t deserve the radiant coziness that came with trinkets and baubles, didn’t deserve the framed pictures - that would crash to the ground anyway, as the drywall often crumbled and fragmented - and surely didn’t deserve the mellow residents who resided in it. 

Both home from work, and both exhausted beyond belief, they sat together on an old, thrifted loveseat. A gaudy flower pattern that was stained and smelled of cigarettes from the latter owners, but a place to sit nonetheless. The man shuffled through a slew of mail, the woman, with her eyes closed and trying not to fall asleep right then and there, sat next to him. 

“I’m so fucking tired of paying this shit,” he grumbled before throwing the envelopes onto the rickety coffee table. A table that was discounted, dirt cheap, as one leg was cracked and wobbly. Oftentimes, it broke when too much weight was put on it, duct tape lined the connection between the leg and table itself. All it held was other envelopes - bills, an array of clipped coupons, and a long forgotten coffee cup, that’s rim was chipped and the handle cracked. 

“Then don’t,” the woman hummed in response, a cheeky reply to a serious notion. An exhaustion riddled in her voice that made him look over and sigh, heart strings pulled taut at seeing her weary form. “We can run away together and never have to see this shit hole again.” 

He stayed quiet for a moment, letting a pause settle between them. Allowed the sound of the fan in the far corner of the room to take over the silence he offered, the hum of it engulfed the room as it rotated to cool the entire apartment. “Maybe we should,” he sighed before a small smile pulled at his lips. “We can go off grid and everything, y’know they make shows about people that live like that, right? We could be famous.”

A breath of air passed through the woman’s nose as she chuckled, and she opened her eyes to look over at him. “You’re an idiot.” Even as she smiled at him, he couldn’t help but notice just how tired she looked. Her eyes were dark and hazy, unfocused even, as it seemed like all she wanted to do was close them again - to sleep. Her work uniform crumbled and wrinkled as she sat with her legs up on the small couch, too worn out to change upon coming, to what they reluctantly called, home. 

Home, to them, was coming back at odd hours. Never fully holding each other as the other had to whisk themselves away - to provide, to work. Times were fleeting, just as much as the money that came in. Gone within a second and drained from responsibilities. Every second together was taken with an ironclad grip, and sewn together with cups upon cups of coffee just to try and enjoy it all.

“Where would you want to go if we had the money to leave?” The off kilter question left his lips easily, without much thought put behind it. Because to him, that's all he ever thought about - leaving. He hoped one day he was able to scrape up enough funds, pack everything up, and leave the cramped unit all together with her by his side.

“Anywhere, honestly, this place sucks ass.” She groaned as she stretched her legs off the loveseat. A series of pops from overworked limbs hit his ears and made him frown - she didn't deserve to be this tired, not for this piece of shit apartment. Not for anything.

“I’m serious.” His normal, almost whimsical, tone went with the wind as he sat up a little straighter. He looked over to her with red tinged eyes, fatigued and strained, that swirled with an unforeseen worry.

“So am I.” A curt reply as she locked eyes with him. A realist, maybe a bit pessimistic to some, but the woman grounded herself in reality more than he. Didn't want to waste herself away with thoughts of what could be than what is. What could be was a sham, a figment of imagination she couldn't bear herself to think about often; as the thought of what is yanked her to the very pits of longing that she would later have to tear herself out of. 

“I know where I’d want to go.” A dream he hadn’t told her before, he wished he had the money to surprise her with it. But that day was far off in the distance, a mere glimmer of a memory, and he cracked under the pressure of wanting to share. At least this way, they could experience the dream together.

“Yeah? Where?” She closed her eyes again and let her head fall to his shoulder. 

“I’d want to go to Tokyo.”

She snorted at the thought, “spare me, Hiro, not this shit again.” A half hearted joke that landed a bit on edge, toed the line of snappy through drowsy laced words. A former wish she had heard before from him, a joke to only go to Tokyo to get piss drunk with friends. 

“No, not the bar hopping thing.” He assured and waved off the remark with a small chuckle. 

“Good, because you do that shit with Mattsun here anyway. You don’t need to drag me to Tokyo just for me to babysit you two idiots there.” Babysitting, truly, was an understatement to the woman. The thought made her cringe as she recalled past memories of his dear friend passed out in their bathroom, head in the toilet and completely out cold. 

“I want to take you to Ueno Park to see the cherry blossoms one day.” His voice was a twinge quieter than before, a bit breathless as he couldn’t believe himself for finally saying the dream aloud. Deep brown eyes shifted over to look at the woman, whose head still rested on his shoulder - completely silent.

The comment had her at a lack of words, letting another silence pass by them once more; but it lingered far too long. A silence that, as moments passed, began to have a weight to it and started to suffocate her. Every inhale became shallower than the last, and she couldn’t find it within herself to take a single breath more of the humid, musky air the apartment provided. She felt herself tumble into the gaping hole of wanting, needing, craving - pure, unbridled hunger for more than what is. A ravishing feeling that took her by the shoulders and shoved, falling head first into the empty, hollow feeling of what could be.

What could be was far from reality, what could be couldn’t happen.

She lifted her head from his shoulder and looked over at him, eyes a bit wider than before and lips parted through means to say something - nothing ever came. “You told me three years ago you wanted to do that.” Quiet words answered her unspoken question and she sucked in a breath. She remembered telling him that vividly, could recall the day to a tee as it held importance to her.

It rained that day, poured down onto the street as they ran back to their shared apartment - a better one than what they had now. Steps taken hastily, hand in hand, as he practically dragged her through the downpour with a laugh. Both forgot an umbrella, so they ran through the rain getting more and more soaked with every step. It wasn’t far from their unit, the pair only went down the street to a convenience store. But the storm they tried to outrun inevitability caught up with them, so the leisurely walk back home turned to a sprint.

Upon their return, they found themselves sprawled out on their bedroom floor. Their clothes drenched from rain and water puddled onto the hardwood underneath them. A silly action, to lay on the floor wet. But neither minded as they giggled and laughed with one another, enjoying the other’s company. 

Strawberry blonde hair stuck to his forehead and he raked a hand through it. A chuckle left his lips from an earlier conversation before he looked over at her once more, “if you could go anywhere in the world, where would you want to go?”

“What kind of question is that, Hiro?” A teasing tone laced within her cadence as she locked eyes with him. Bright and hopeful, full of love, and not an ounce of exhaustion swirling within them.

“One that I’m curious about, obviously, so indulge me.” The whimsy in his words was easily apparent, one of which she got used to quickly. And there was a sass in the timbre of his voice that muddled with care, a juxtaposition to his usual standalone brassiness. 

“What’s yours?”

“This isn’t about me, it’s about you.”

He watched the woman smile before she averted her eyes to the ceiling, scrunched her brows in thought a moment before she looked at him once more. “Probably Ueno Park, in April, to see the cherry blossoms.”

“Are you serious? Anywhere in the world, and you want Tokyo?” He never looked away from the woman throughout the conversation, and when she met his gaze once more he smiled. 

“Did you ask just to make fun of me, asshole?”

“No, god no.” He laughed, lips pulling into a silly smile before he took her hand in his own. “I’m just trying to figure out where I should ask you to marry me one day.”

The inescapable feeling of want consumed her, leaving nothing left behind as she was swallowed whole. A swirling sensation in her stomach that sickened her, made her ill to think about too long as all she could do was stare at him. “Takahiro.” Her words fell to a whisper as eyes flickered between his own, desperately trying to gauge the situation but to no avail. “You can’t be serious?”

“As a heart attack, sweetheart.” The smile he had started to falter, and the concern that saturated her eyes made his heart sink. But through that concern, the smallest, most miniscule, glimmer of need shone through. Even through tired, bloodshot eyes and a tinge of cynicism, she wanted the dream just as much as he, if not more.

“Hanamaki,” she breathed. “Be real for a second-” But she was cut off as he turned to face her, the old loveseat squeaking under the shift of weight, and he took her hands in his own

“I am being real, so put that name away.” Erring on defensive, put a care behind it that she couldn't ignore. A rare seriousness in his voice that made her swallow hard. “I’m taking you to see those damn cherry blossoms at some point, and when I do I'm asking you to marry me.” 

She opened her mouth to say something but promptly shut it, not knowing what to say to the man. But she felt as the ravenous feeling turned to a starved, almost primal, one. Felt her stomach twist into knots at the thought - she wanted to swallow the notion completely. Needed to feel the crunch and snap of it in her mouth, wanted her teeth caught in it, needed it to be consumed until nothing was left. She abstained from could be for too long and needed to devour the concept entirely. 

But could be wasn’t what is. What is left a bruise, tender and raw, that left a rotten taste in her mouth. She felt the urge to spit out the thought as it circled within her mind like a vulture, ready to dive within a split second. “But-”

“We will, I swear.” He cut off her protest and squeezed her hand. But to no avail, as she only looked at him with a sense of apprehension.

“But we're-” 

“I know, I know,” he sighed. Brown eyes slid over to the envelopes on the coffee table, bold red letters catching his attention that made him close his eyes. “Believe me, I know.” A disheartening belief that caused him to take a deep breath before opening his eyes again to look at her. He brought a hand to her cheek, pale fingers gently brushed over her skin with a warmth that was inviting, loving, and selfless. He gave her a small, out of sorts, smile, “but I want to do this. For you. For us. Hell, because we deserve to do something nice. I want us to have something to look forward to other than the same, shit ass, walls everyday.” 

She paused a moment, let his words sink in, before she bit down hard on the concept and refused to let go. “Ok,” she nodded carefully. “Alright, we’ll go to Ueno Park one day.” Could be tasted sweet and savory, mouth watering to think about. It eased a craving that deflected from what is - so just this once, she let herself free fall into it. “Do you even have a ring to ask me with?” 

His smile pulled into a grin at her question, and he chuckled. “Would you say yes to a ring pop?”

With a paltry laugh, she leaned into his hand that was still on his cheek. “As long as it's strawberry, then absolutely, you dumbass.”

“Strawberry it is, sweetheart.” 

However, he didn’t really need the sweet, confectionary ring. In one of the many old cardboard boxes within the living area and bedroom that collected dust - a particularly well kept, small box hidden in the back of their tiny, shared closet - was a ring he bought three years ago. Bought shortly after the conversation was had, when he still had the money to stretch. Stuffed between memories that would barely ever see the light of day, because a place like this didn't deserve such warmth.

But the warmth was willingly given anyway, whether the pair knew it or not.

series taglist (open, send an ASK) + a few moots bc I am genuinely very very very proud of this

@causenessus @softpia @renardiererin @kodzu-ken @phoenix-eclipses

@wyrcan @honeekyuu @wakashudou @wolffmaiden @eggyrocks

@dailyakira @cupidsblonde @mollyrolls @wolffmaiden @zumicho

@jadeoru @sandwhitches

[fight-nights-at-freddys]

"I don't support it in real life!"CW: talk of sexualizing minors, slight rant

Then why write about it? If for coping purposes, why post it online for others (especially actual predators) to see and consume? Then why portray those things in a positive light instead of condemning them?And you're seriously going to tell me that just because as an adult (1) you want to see a fictional minor (that mind you, is usually designed to resemble an actual child) depicted in sexual situations doesn't mean you don't share that same view concerning children in real life? You find fictional minors attractive but not real ones? Why does the line between finding someone who is (and usually also looks like) a child sexually attractive get drawn at whether the child is real or not? I'm not calling anyone pedophiles, but if the shoe fits...(1) No I am not talking about 18 y/os finding 17 y/os attractive. Use your brain. Creating content of underaged characters is still questionable regardless of age, however.

"Just mute/block instead of harassing others!"I have nearly 70k people blocked on twitter, and hundreds of words and tags muted, I softblock and mute people who post things I don't want to see. I still see certain things on my timeline, usually because1) It's posted in the main tags of something I'm interested in2) The post isn't even tagged at all3) If someone quote retweets from someone I've blocked, I still see the take on my timeline.

"Antis use the same rhetoric as exclusionists and TERFS!"What exactly does being against pedophilia have to do with trans (women) exclusionary radical feminism?And what does lgbtq discourse in general have to do with not wanting minors to be sexualized?

"Antis harass people!"Apparently, proshippers have never done this before! Not once has a grown adult stalked literal children for calling their ships gross!Not saying harassments ok at all, but let's not act like the poor proshippers are being oppressed here.Also, I promise you, someone saying "x is a proshipper, please block them if you don't want to see their content" is not harassment. Writing callout posts and videos on underaged "antis", however is most definitely harassment but y'all don't want to hear that. People have the right to know if they are platforming people who go against their personal beliefs and morals. Choosing to hide that from people who would otherwise not want to interact with you for the sake of not wanting to "lose friends" makes you a bad person, and you should feel bad.

replying under the cut bc this ask was long enough, and i don't wanna make ppl who follow us/see this have to scroll for eons

why do you think coping mechanisms have to stay private? if someone's coping mechanism was yoga, or working out, would you say they have to do that by themselves, in the confines of their own house, and they aren't allowed to talk to anyone else about it? i hope not, because that would be ridiculous (inb4 "yeah but yoga isn't harming anyone!", neither is fiction!).

the fact of the matter is, anyone can consume any type of content, and that shouldn't prevent people from making what they like. why not portray it in a positive light? what does it matter? any regular person knows that what they see in fiction should not necessarily be replicated in real life. i know better than to go out and kill someone just because billy loomis and stu macher do it.

furthermore, wouldn't you want actual pedophiles to use fiction rather than them going out and hurting real children? that's not how that works, but using your argument that they're one and the same, wouldn't that be better for everyone, and result in less people getting hurt, ergo fiction doesn't hurt anyone?

no, fictional characters are not meant to resemble actual children. that IS a crime. however, you cannot look at an anime child, or idk, kid ashley from TCOAAL, and tell me that looks like a REAL child. that's nonsense. and no, it does NOT mean i "share the same view concerning children in real life", because those characters aren't real, and i (can't believe i have to say this) am NOT attracted to real children. yes, you ARE calling me a pedophile, which is just categorically not true. it's not "questionable" because it's not REAL, which is necessary for someone to be diagnosed with pedophilia, which is a disorder, and not just some label you can put on people.

genuinely, if you are THAT sensitive to people having other opinions, or are sensitive to different kinds of art, maybe social media isn't the place for you to be. if the post isn't tagged, i agree, something should be done about that, but the fact is, WE DO tag our stuff. that has nothing to do with me (or chica), or even proshippers as a whole. you're doing the thing were you believe one rotten apple spoils the bunch.

when you post something online, you HAVE to understand that literally anyone can view it, and if your accounts aren't private, anyone can interact with it. that is the cost of posting online. if you can't handle that, log off.

i don't think i've ever compared being an anti to being a terf/exclus, BUT they do objectively share some of the same opinions as conservatives, and even nazis (which is NOT to say all antis are conservatives/nazis, but that you share some of the same ideals).

i can't speak much to that because i don't think i've ever made that argument, but it is a lil radfem-y when most of y'all go after specifically BL and yaoi. also terfs aren't only bigoted towards trans women, it's also trans men. idk why you said that.

yes, correct, anyone can harass anyone, but the fact of the matter is, 99% of the time proshippers get harassed, it's while we're in our own lanes, minding our own business, and y'all (much like you're doing right now) come into OUR spaces and call us pedophiles, and say we deserve to die, or that we should kill ourselves.

if you've been following this blog for the last week-ish, you'd have seen some prime examples of just that. doing nothing, talking to no one, and getting harassed. people saying i should be on watchpeopledie, saying i should be killed, that they hope i get cancer, or die in a car accident, or that my dad beats me to death. that i should "slit", cut to the bone, kill myself, hang myself. threatening to doxx me, find my address, have tried to grab my ip. the difference is, when proshippers are found to be doing this stuff, they're called out and reported, often by other proshippers, whereas antis, when they exhibit this behavior, they are encouraged. they're praised by their peers.

if all people did was say "x is a proshipper, block them", we wouldn't have an issue, but the fact is, a significant amount of y'all don't start with blocking. you start with slurs, nasty names, disgusting accusations, and downright deplorable behavior BEFORE you block us. if you block us. and when we block you, it's entirely possible you just create a new account to harass us from, or grab your friends to do it for you.

if platforming people who like different types of fiction than you is that big of a problem, that you feel the need to write callouts, make google docs, harass them, and threaten to doxx them, you need to get off the internet. stop interacting with people AT ALL. live in a bubble. because again, people you don't like are always going to exist on the internet, it's your duty to navigate that in the best way you can, WITHOUT hurting anyone.

people hide the fact they're proship because we don't want the harassment. that's sorta the crux of the issue? you're completely ignoring the COUNTLESS posts of people being harassed for simply existing and being proship. we shouldn't be made to feel bad for trying to protect ourselves and our peace, YOU should be made to feel bad for making others feel bad.

[cloudmancy]

which is worse: d20 tumblr or d20 twitter?

this is such a funny question. frankly I prefer talking with my existing friends over discord over either of them but here's a breakdown of my experience with them

d20 tumblr

feels like a more isolating experience because of the way tumblr is set up in general as a platform. I follow relatively few people here, so all my interactions are from people engaging with my art (love you mwah) or asking me questions. nearly every time I go into a d20 related tag I regret it

I think frankly I disagree with 90% of the opinions on d20 here but because I don't have to see it I can just post my art and go

feels relatively static like there's not a good way to get everyone talking about a specific transformative fandom thing instead of only what's happening in canon because it's a looser more disconnected community

allows for longer posts and the search system on my own blog is great though. I love directing people to go through my tags or archived art

d20 twitter

incredibly, astonishingly, bad at recognizing jokes for people who are fans of a comedy show

way easier to interact with people which means most of the friends I make are from d20twt...

very easy to get everyone talking about one specific thing (ie fhsonas) because of how interactive Twitter is as a platform and how quickly word spreads

downside of this^ is that every time I express an opinion someone disagrees with they tend to assume that this is a majority opinion rather than like, 3-4 popular gay asian artists speaking their mind? when I complained about fhjy 18 battle on here I got interesting and thoughtful reblogs and everyone kept it respectful meanwhile on twitter people started making vaguetweets about how people who hated the episode were morons. stuff like us joking that oisin's grandma's whole mahjong group got murked getting 200 likes VS people directly shitting on us getting 1.7k likes and people going "wait... people are mad about oisins grandma for REAL?! she was going to kill people !!" getting 2k likes. clearly there is some sort of strange authority people put on your words whether or not you're actually just trying to have fun with your friends

I did talk about this more on twitter but I am not a fan of the CRitterfication of d20twt either. feels like much of the fandom is now watching because they're megafans of the cast rather than for the story which leads to some really big toxic positivity bias and the implication that criticism of the show == direct attack on the crew and therefore on THEM because parasocial attachment. I don't think it helps that for a majority of them d20 is their first big fandom experience aside from like... kpop or tswift because they have not developed a lot of the detachment from canon + not being parasocial + ignoring opinions you don't like if they're not directly addressed at you mechanisms that people who've been around have. sorry I'm not trying to fandom elder or whatever here I'm 21 years old but I think it's incredibly hard for me to interact with people whose entire understanding of canon depend on siobhan thompson's opinions like this

tldr;

d20twt has way less reading comprehension and critical thinking skills. better for making friends. I interact almost entirely with 30-40 of my artist friends. (my) d20tumblr experience is more chill and feels like I'm doing a seminar and people come up to ask me questions afterward. more isolating but easier to do my own thing. I do recognize and am fond of a lot of you but I've made one (1) entire friend who I can talk to off platform and not just see on the dash/my notes and that's just the nature of how tumblr works as a platform (it's terrible for conversations)

[idwtransformers-vibe]

(⁠.⁠ ⁠❛⁠ ⁠ᴗ⁠ ⁠❛⁠.⁠) a fluffy fic with idw prowl, maybe (fem.reader) them having to share a habsuite because they're transferred to a different facility. so, one berth. prowl, after mass displacement, begrudingly sleeps next to the human and reluctantly submits to the cuddles (human is too soft not to cuddle.)

Heya! Hope you don't mind me using my Soul-Spark Airways idea in this! If you want, I can tag you in it!

Now, onto the one berth trope (my favorite tbh)

IDW Prowl sharing a berth with fem!reader:

"Are you serious?" Prowl glared at Optimus and Soul-Spark Airways maintenance manager. "What do you mean I have to share MY hab with (Y/n)?" He demanded an answer. He does not like the thought of sharing his space. He loved his space. Never once had he ever had a roommate, not in his personal quaters, at least. The war is over. Why should he share his space with a human?

"Prowl, it is only temporary. Unfortunately, her documents got mixed up, and someone at the badging office deactivated her badge by accident. She is not allowed to be alone on Cybertron until her badge is working again, and since it's not working, she can't be alone without an escort... You are the only one available with the authorization to escort her." Optimus explained apologetically. He knew he was asking for a lot with these terms. While he didn't want to force Prowl into this, he would hate for the woman to get stranded somewhere on Cybertron.

"We'll try to get her badge sorted as quick as we can and try to relocate her documents." The maintenance manager chimed in. He felt bad for both his mechanic and Prowl. Mainly for the mechanic, though, as this was sheer bad luck.

Prowl glared at the human who stood on the table before him. He glared down at the fragile yet resilient being. "Why not find the IDIOT who deactivated her badge and the IDIOT who lost her he documents?" He seethed.

"Well... The badging office is a different company-" The manager was soon cut off by an irritated groan.

Prowl has met (Y/n) before. She had done heavy maintenance on him after he had gotten into a pretty bad battle. At the time, she was the only mechanic available and performed emergency repairs on him. He hadn't seen her since then, though. But, he has spoken to her before through comms. She had always helped him with getting things delivered. "Fine. She can stay with me." He huffed. His optics narrowed at the two as they both seemed to have a look of relief on their faces.

"Thank you... We'll have someone pick her up."

"You better have someone alright." He grumbled.

A few hours went by. He figured (Y/n) was having to go through strict security protocol as she no longer had her badge.

Soon, he heard a knock on the door. He left his desk and went to open the door. There she was, in her mechanic uniform with a bag full of clothes and necessities. She gave him a smile, quite happy to see him again. "Long time no see." She smiled.

"Indeed." He moved himself out of the way to let her in.

Once she was in, he shut the door behind her. She seemed to be admiring the cleanliness of his hab. "Nice place." She complimented.

Prowl didn't respond. He only carefully moved past her to go back to his desk. (Y/n) tried to see what he was looking at on the datapad, but was too small to see. She heard him grumble in his language over something. She can understand Cybertronian somewhat, but only enough to greet someone or to excuse herself.

Little to her knowledge, Prowl was trying to locate her documents herself. But since he does not work for Soul-Spark Airways, he was denied access. He could manipulate the system... But he doesn't feel like facing the consequences of losing this company's trust.

So, he simply set the datapad down and looked down at them. "I'm going to lay down some rules. Do not touch my stuff, do not leave this hab unless I am with you, or until you have your badge back, and do not stick your nose into my business, and once you have your badge, you're out, understood?"

She nodded. She was warned that he was quite prickly. Although, it was go figure for her. He was always stern and prickly when he wanted certain things transported when the war was going on not too long ago.

Later that evening, after (Y/n) had her dinner, and Prowl had refueled. One got ready to turn in for the night while the other was looking at more data files. "So... Where will I sleep?" The woman asked.

Prowl sighed and looked over his shoulder as if she were disrupting him. She wasn't. He's just annoyed about sharing his space. "You can sleep on my berth."

"What about you, though?" She asked with confusion in her voice. There was only one berth here, where was he going to rest?

"I plan on staying up."

"Prowl, I've worked on your systems before. Your tanks don't have enough energy to pull off 24 hours. Not like an aircraft bot, they can do 24 to 48 hours." (Y/n) explained. This earned her quite the grimace from the autobot. He clearly didn't like being told that his body could not handle the 24-hour function.

"Rest." He ordered.

"You know I'm right-"

"And I don't care. Now sleep." He ordered once more.

The mechanic rolled her eyes some. He was still the same stubborn mech. So, she laid on his berth without another word. She tried to sleep, but it was proven difficult. She spent so much time being a Cargo-Runner that she had gotten used to the sound of a bots internal system running. She normally slept inside of her aircraft bot friend. Their system internal system was loud, but soothing to her. So the sudden silence with the only sound of tapping was a bit unsettling to her.

Prowl would tap away at the files. His systems started signifying that it was time to rest. He would defer the warning, but then it would come right back. This kept happening that he just tossed the datapad onto the desk. He turned his helm to look at the barely sleeping human. A part of him yearned for human touch. The plush and soft feeling of them was almost the equivalent of a human hugging a soft plushie, almost.

He carefully stood up from his desk and made his way over to the berth. He stared at her more. The soft hue of his optics glowed down on her figure. He went back and forth in his mind. A part of him says no, why in Primus's name would he cuddle someone, while the other part him wondered what's the harm in cuddling a human? This could help him relax, which is something he really needed. 'Oh, frag it.' He thought to himself. Prowl carefully laid next to (Y/n)

This startled her slightly, a little surprised to find herself being spooned by the grumpy bot. "Prowl?"

"Go to sleep." He mumbled. Prowl was not about to have this conversation now. He didn't want to, and he never will.

She could feel his firm hold on her. It didn't too tight, but firm enough to the point that she couldn't move, but she found a way to shift herself around some enough to face herself towards him. He surprisingly felt comfortable, he felt warm. He felt like something that came fresh out of the dryer.

So, she laid her head on his chassis. There was the sound she craved to hear, they running sound of the Cybertronian system. She could finally feel herself become sleepy.

Prowl was a bit surprised by this, but he accepted it nonetheless. He slowly rubbed her back and entangled his legs with hers. This felt good on his joints, not that he was that old, but it does feel good. He could see why a lot of bots made cuddle buddies out of the humans. Maybe he could make a cuddle buddy out of her? Well... Maybe not... He needs to give it some thought. For now, he'll enjoy this moment. He buried his face into the top of her head and sighed with satisfactory. Maybe this arrangement wasn't so bad after all.

[fanartka]

can you tag your mid ass AI art so nobody gotta look at that crap thanks 🌹

My answer is "No."

And this is the line beyond which my patience finally ceases to be patient.

@docty-strange If you can't see beauty, then maybe you shouldn't force your radical opinion on those who don't need it.

AI is a tool with which a person can translate his ideas, his thoughts from words into an image, a way for an artist to create something in a style different from his own and sometimes adopt an idea, a well-generated fold of a patterned garment or something similar to use already in what he draws with his own hands.

This is not an enemy, not a devil, it is not even intelligence, it is a tool, like Photoshop and other programs, including programs that people use to improve the quality of screenshots and photos, by the way.

I am old enough to remember heated discussions about the idea that digital artists are not real artists, but just hacks. And although I'm not old enough to remember the Luddites, I'm sure they had very similar rhetoric when they broke machines that only improved people's lives.

Every time something new appears, most people perceive it as a threat. There are still people who blame smartphones and computers for all human ills, just as a few centuries ago fanatics believed that the devil sat in the clock and turned the mechanism. I think our ancestors, who first began to use sharpened stones instead of fists, were also perceived as something strange and threatening. But this is just progress.

The world is changing. AI isn't perfect, it has a problem with human fingers and there are some legal issues that need to be ironed out, but this thing allows people to create beauty that wouldn't otherwise exist. AI helps in scientific calculations, including medical calculations, and much more.

Oh, and thank god I don't have to buy marble, hire a sculptor, and figure out where to find space for a Strange statue in my apartment, because I can see what such a statue would look like with the help of AI.

But pestering other people with all sorts of nasty things and demanding that they do as you would like is unacceptable. Seriously, when haters come to my inbox, most of them are homophobes who claim that Stephen would never love a guy and demand that I stop disgracing him, or with statements like that.

AI can make beauty, but you can only produce hatred and bother people with your demands. If you don't like it, don't watch it. That's how the Internet works.

Take it back 🌹 You know what to do with it.

[autistichalsin]

Okay, I’ve been a bit scared because I’ve been observing from the sidelines, but I do want you to know this isn’t a hateful or troll ask, I’m genuinely asking for clarification.

In my experience, “pro-shipping” has always meant ‘problematic shipping’, and all of the people I’ve talked to about this have said the same thing.

Am I the one who’s misconstrued? I really don’t get it.

Being called “pro-harassment” or “pro-censorship” is hurtful and confusing as all hell.

I don’t harass people for what they create. I don’t care to do that. I block and move on, and warn people if I know they could be upset by the content.

But I also don’t understand how certain things are justified.

I am personally not bothered by much, but I have watched friends and acquaintances go through visceral traumatic reactions because people have decided to air out their coping by sharing it with the public. (I.E, people who write romantic incestual fics, etc)

I don’t give a shit what people write. I really don’t. But it feels harmful to use the excuse of coping when you, in turn, could be hurting dozens of others.

Like I said, I genuinely am not trying to be hateful here. I’m confused, and still distraught that all of this is happening. I don’t think anyone deserves to be harassed. I just also don’t get the logic here.

Pro-shipping never once meant problematic shipping. It meant opposite of "anti" because antis would come and invade the tags and asks, calling them all kinds of names if they found their ships distasteful.

Sorry that being indirectly accused of supporting harassment hurt your feelings. Imagine how I felt, being DIRECTLY accused of supporting rape in real life because of my taste in fiction. You are throwing in your lot with people who can't distinguish fantasy and reality.

I don't like incest fics either, anon. They are triggering for me. So you know what I do? I don't read fics tagged as incest. For that reason, I have never been triggered by an incest fic. I suppose I would be if I read an incest fic that wasn't tagged as much, but you will never find a single pro-shipper who defends posting such content without a tag. You are responsible for your own experience online; it is your job to curate the content.

If it was just seeing that the fic exists that triggered the response, then I'm sorry to say they're still in the wrong. As a survivor, learning that triggers exist and how to navigate those triggers is on you. We are responsible for how we deal with our trauma. Your friends didn't deserve their traumas, and they deserve kindness and support, but requesting that people never be allowed to write distasteful fiction so that they don't have to be upset by the idea that someone somewhere shipped incest is not reasonable. Their feelings are valid; it's totally reasonable to be triggered, to strictly curate your online experience. It's reasonable to block everyone who ships the upsetting incest ships, to put an "incest shippers DNI" on your page, all of it. It's not reasonable to call them supporters of IRL incest or to accuse them of causing your trauma. It isn't hard at all on AO3 or Tumblr; they even give you the option to blacklist/filter out certain tags so you can avoid it without blocking users. There's easily half a dozen safeguards that already exist that are a lot less radical, a lot less likely to be weaponized against queer users, and a lot easier to enforce than trying to remove them.

Me writing fics, such as a character using kink to cope, can only harm a user who doesn't curate their feed (and who reads fics they know will trigger them, which I can only assume would then be a purposeful form of self-harm). Denying other survivors their coping mechanism, though, IS a direct form of harm. Stigmatizing recovery by saying that survivors are in any way akin to abusers for creating fiction is a direct form of harm.

It sounds to me like you've absorbed some very harmful and very narrow ideas of what recovery should and should not look like, and what is and isn't a good/valid survivor. You might want to reflect on why you're turning your attention to policing what survivors do to cope so much.

[1nv1s1bl3-r41ndr0p5]

Hey! I'm Petrichor/Petri, and I use he/they pronouns :)

I've been on Tumblr for many years now (different blogs) and I decided I wanted a fresh start!!

~about me~

I am a minor- over 18s are welcome on my blog, but no NSFW accounts please!! (terfs, homophobes, racists, etc. = DNI)

I am autistic- a lot of my posts will be related to this!! I also have a lot of mental and physical health problems, so be prepared to see a lot of vents :)

I have been battling a self-harm addiction for 9 years (currently not clean :/) and disordered eating for 6 1/2.

I am transgender FtM and bi-aroace (technically, I'm nebularomantic but, but I say aro usually as it is easier for people to understand).

~what do I like?~

My favourite film is The Imitation Game (my beloved <3), and I like shows and flims such as: Ghosts, Horrible Histories, Bridgerton, Heartstopper, Sherlock, Moomin, Good Omens, Bluey, Stranger Things, Shameless, Hidden Figures, Brooklyn 99 and Coraline.

I LOVE musicals. My favourites are Hamilton, Six, Dear Evan Hansen, Hairspray and Les Misèrables.

I like reading too!! My favourite books are The Seven Sisters series by Lucinda Riley

Music is my main coping mechanism, I listen to music every day and it helps me massively :)

>My favourite band is Bears in Trees and I mostly listen to indie/vent music and musicals

My hyperfixations are plants, stationery, writing, poetry, Hamilton, anagrams + word puzzles, birds, sharks, alpacas, space and The Imitation Game.

I have an ESSA (emotional support stuffed animal) called Penelope. She is a penguin and I take her everywhere!!

IMPORTANT!!

I am trying to cope with what I believe is DID. I've noticed signs of it for a while (many years) but recently it's got a lot worse and I can't hide it anymore. If you know me irl and I haven't told you, feel free to ask (tbh that goes for anyone on here) about it.

Currently there are 4 entities? alters? headmates? that appear? front? this terminology is confusing and idk what I'm allowed to say bc I'm not officially diagnosed.

E (irl me), co-host (🌿)

Petri/Petrichor, co-host- I use their name for my tumblr now (🦠)

Brynn, protector I guess?? (🎧)

Rain, child alter and only speaks French (🌧)

Sparrow, child alter and is non-verbal (🦅)

don't hate us for this, it's scary and we're just trying to figure out what's going on as a system.

(also if it is DID instead of maladaptive daydreaming I would be a traumagenic system)

☆about my neurodiversity☆

•about my mental and physical health•

my mutuals are:

@kaipler-22b

@mossy-introvert

@loulooser

@s1l4s-w0rsh1ps-t0m4t03s

@sunshinerosefromthedead

@sp4rklemuffin

tags!!

#petri rambles

#petrichor's thoughts

#petri vents

#petri-tism

#petrichor-blimey

#petrichor outside!!

#rain 🌧

#brynn 🎧

#sparrow 🦅

#sparrow's silent rambles

#petri 🌿

[bobtheacorn]

I've decided your tags on that post about Leo not being anyone's favorite brother are the only take I will be accepting from here on out. Galaxy brained and honestly very in character for all of them lol.

tags from this: #leo is actually Everyone's favorite brother they just all insist that he isn't bc he would be Insufferable if he found out #april asking 'whos your favorite bro' in pre-lair game interviews and don mike and raph instinctively going #'leo - WAIT I MEAN [other brother]' April being like Mhm *writing that down*. donnie makes her sign an nda

Thanks I made myself sad about it actualy dslfkjskldf

-

"Who's your favorite brother?" April asks.

Mikey answers at once, cheerfully:

"Leo." He realizes what he's said as soon as it's out of his mouth, while April is gleefully jotting the answer down on her interview notepad, her phone balanced in her other hand, recording an audio file for redundancy's sake; Mikey looks at her pleadingly, clapping both hands together. "Don't tell 'im I said that, April! I'll never live it down! Especially with the Games comin' up!"

"My lips are sealed!" she promises.

-

"Who's your favorite brother?"

"Leo," Raph says - and then laughs nervously when he actually processes the question, slumping back on the bench and folding his arms like he's trying to hide something, avoiding eye contact, "I mean! Mikey! No, no - Donnie! I mean - Raph loves all of his brothers equally…!"

"I didn't ask which one you loved more," April clarifies with amusement, rolling her eyes, "I asked which one's ya favorite. Big difference!"

"Raph doesn't have favorites," Raph asserts, "And if he did, it definitely wouldn't be Mister Always Rubs His Five Years of Victory in Our Faces!"

"Uhuh," April says, circling something in her notebook.

-

"Donnie, who's your favorite brother?"

"I refuse to answer on the grounds that anything I say can be used against me - "

"Donnie. This is a for-fun Pre-Lair Games interview."

".....Are our answers confidential?"

"Exclusively for my eyes only! I'm not gonna publicly display your answers on the fridge or anything."

"Sigh. Obviously it's Leo." Obviously, April thinks, trying to suppress her fond smile so Donnie doesn't see it and suddenly become allergic to his own Emotions. She busies herself with her notebook while Donnie pushes back and forth in his gamer chair, fingers steepled in front of him like a super villain. "He has the most consistent pro-to-con ratio, if only marginally - though that is subject to change in the next month, what with the Lair Games coming up."

"Obviously," April says, waving a hand.

Donnie narrows his eyes at her.

-

"Who's your favorite brother?"

"Aha, a trick question," Leo says smugly, "You'll have to get up earlier in the day to pull that one over on ole Leon."

"I'm not pullin' anything," April laughs.  "I'm askin' all you guys the same questions! Just tryin' t'think of some fun little headliners for the interviews and stuff, y'know? All in good fun. Now answer the question!"

"Uuh-huh. Well, it depends on the day of the week, I guess," Leo evades, shrugging.

He's playing with some fidget toy in his lap, allowing it to distract him. April is perched on the arm of the chair beside him, so she can't see his face. She folds one of her legs over the other, notepad balanced on her thigh while she taps out a rhythm with the mechanical pencil.

She can't help but tease him.

"Wanna guess who said Leo was their fav?"

She's not really gonna tell him. (That would break her NDAs.) And what it would do to his ego, she doesn't like to think - but she expects him to guess correctly, anyway. She's fully prepared to brush him off and play a little game of as if. But Leo chuckles and braces his feet on the opposite arm of the chair, pushing his shell briefly back into April's side, and says brightly, "Oh I guarantee you, I am nobody's fav. I'm too magnificent! They hate me cuz they ain't me."

Now that catches April off guard.

"Excuse me?"

Leo curls the fidget toy into his palm to touch his fingers, counting off, "Raph and Donnie both probably picked Mikey - and who can blame them, he's got all of us wrapped around his adorable little baby brother fingers. But if they picked each other, it's because Donnie actually shows up the most for Raph's missions because he loves having a Schedule, and because Raph always lets Donnie infodump at him because he likes listening to someone talk. And I know Mikey picked Donnie, because Raph always tries to smother-hen him."

"Uhuh," April says, uncertain about how she's feeling right now. This was supposed to be for laughs, but she's not laughing. Sharply, she adds, "Are you playin' with me right now?"

"I would never!" Leo says, scandalized by the very idea. He flicks the fidget toy so it swirls between his fingers, and he chuckles. "But I'm gonna play those losers like a Kazoo during the next Lair Games! What's the next question, Apricot??"

April taps her eraser against the notebook.

She doesn't have one ready.

.

[larkral]

Hello!! Thanks for the tags @hushed-chorus, @bookish-bogwitch, @cosmicalart, @j-nipper-95, @forabeatofadrum, @orange-peony, @ileadacharmedlife and @aroace-genderfluid-sheep! So fun to see what everyone is working on!

I've been doing some tests for audio for my @caught-on-tape-fest, which has been difficult because my children have been home sick almost every day this week. Anyway, got a first roll of a fic and learned a lot, like: I'm definitely not going to be trying a British accent (comes out half-Australian, I blame Bluey), I need a working doc so that I can highlight different characters dialogue in different colors to allow for different pacing and emphasis, and I need to talk slower. 

That said, I am excited and it's fun. Haven't yet done any editing but I have done that before and I feel pretty sure I'll be able to manage. 

Also this week I wrote some Simon's Two Mums and some of one of my CORB pieces. Sentences from both below!

My CORB piece, draft titled mechanic!Simon:

One of my foster families had three cars up on blocks in the backgarden. Kitty said she collected kids and Jules collected cars. It worked for them. Worked for me too. Kitty wasn't my biggest fan, but Jules didn't mind a quiet pair of eyes watching him, tools being passed his way when he reached for them. He didn't talk a lot either, but when he bought the Mini ('74) he patted the hood and said, "Happy Birthday, Simon."

Simon's two mums (draft titled normal!Simon even though he's reallllly not) also this is 8 sentences. Ah well:

Baz uses words like purview. I can barely get my lips around them. Why the crucible thought that he and I would be good as roommates, I don't know.  But I do like him. And he likes Penny. And Penny likes me. So it works out, even if it does kind of suck to be the in-between friend.  Not that Keris and Penny are better suited as roommates than Baz and me.

One thing that's helping me to work on these two pieces in tandem is that they're both stories where the WOM timeline doesn't happen the way it does in canon, so I get to be really generative in thinking about what the actual universe of CO is like, and what the social and political dynamics would be like if the events that happen canonically hadn't happened. Fun! Difficult! My jam.

Tag/hellos under the cut. :)

Tagging @stitchyqueer @thewholelemon @confused-bi-queer @raenestee @facewithoutheart @cutestkilla @sillyunicorn @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @basiltonbutliketheherb @asocialpessimist @aristocratic-otter @captain-aralias @petedavidsonscock @takitalks @artsyunderstudy @yeonjunenby @carryonvisinata @takenabackbytuesdays @martsonmars @nausikaaa @nightimedreamersghost @chen-chen-chen-again-chen @ionlydrinkhotwater @shrekgogurt @palimpsessed @fatalfangirl​ @blackberrysummerblog​ @valeffelees @imagineacoolusername @whogaveyoupermission @wellbelesbian @rimeswithpurple

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

I've asked myself many times over the course of three years about how would I react to information that comes to contradict a specific image I have about people. And the answer would differ, more or less, depending on a myriad of factors, such as my mental wellbeing, my attitude toward the fandom, the group, the members, etc. The truth is, I only knew how I would respond the moment it happens and I was pleasantly surprised in a way. I see it as a sign that I'm doing better or at least I'm on the path of doing better.

These are things that I didn't want to allow to come to surface in the way I used to handle the BTM blog. Perhaps because the point was to create a platform in which I could offer the rational, researched perspective which I considered to be the correct one. I'm not retracting any of that. I still believe that it is possible to offer a more complex perspective if I can back it up with knowledge from various fields, but it was also one of my defense mechanisms.

Without expanding on the personal reasons, it has become very easy for me to separate my rational and emotional side. So much, that even when I should be staying in the moment and let my emotions take space, I can't really do it, I need to come up with a rational explanation so it can make sense. I then applied this to BTS as well. I couldn't just say I like this group when someone would ask, I would have to tell them about all the studies I read and how my fascination is mostly intelectual, when in truth it was both. I used to talk about jikook only in the context of analysis, be it GCF through semiotics or various types of interpretations when it came to their performances or fandom reception in terms of their dynamics. It had to be in the context of rational fascination and curiosity because I was merely trying to justify myself on why I care that much about two strangers that I look at on my phone. Again, my intellectual curiosity is real, but that has always been only one side if the coin, but it was one that I pushed.

It's about shame actually. I can't actually accept that I have such an interest. It doesn't fit with the idea I have of myself. And sometimes I don't like it because it makes me question my intellect, my critical thinking. How can I be so good academically and at the same time I fear that I've fallen into a fandom trap? I'm smart, right? Right?

I'm sure a lot of people have dealt with or ar going through this process of cognitive dissonance. How does one deal with the mere idea that something they believe in based on their understanding of the world, their ability of decoding (not in a conspiracy sense, but in a Saussurean way) can turn out to be wrong? We see something that resembles a specific behavior that we are surrounded with our entire lives, sometimes we ourselves engage with, but we've identified it wrong on others? Of course, it's through the visual medium, one that is edited. It's a puzzle with large chunks missing, but we're getting a general idea of it. But we can be wrong. So how do we deal with that? Well, I don't have a correct answer.

Me in 2020/2021 would have been more affected because my mental health was not good. I was functionally depressed and I clinged so much onto BTS, Jikook and the small community that I found myself in at that time, that I would have felt a lot more torn than I am now.

A couple of years later and having to actually go through a situation in which my understanding of people's relationship might not be accurate, I realized I'm fine. And I think it's because it made me really register just now that I finally learned how to have fun with it. It took me three years. By having fun, I mean genuinely being able to simply enjoy the little things. I'm still on the path of not being ashamed for liking kpop or spending time talking about the dynamic/relationship of two people.

What prompted this post was reading what is currently being written in the jikook tag. Yes, I had this big introductory chunk that perhaps people won't bother reading, but I'm doing it for myself. If I can't be honest while writing stuff into the void for strangers to read, then what is the point?

I get frustrated very easily. I like debates and contradictory points of view, but not always. And that's because I like to be right. Almost all the time. So when I see something that I believe it lacks logic or I find it absurd, then my fingers are itching. I don't comment or DM people, I can control myself. I'd rather get out of the app and do something else.

What I want to say is I was surprised at how much fanfiction is being written. More that usual. Shipping contains a big deal of fanfiction by its nature. Gestures and events taking place at different times are interpreted and having information added that fills the gaps. People do that because they have to make sense of what they see.

They like to make relationship timelines. They speculate on first kisses and first sexual experiences. That's their imagination. None of us has any way of knowing. The element of fiction is heighted when people feel like they are losing control of the narrative. When they are unsure of what they are seeing. Which is what usually happens in the shipping community on a yearly basis. Anons flooding the bloggers' inboxes because they need confirmation or they didn't get any ship content in a month or two which means something is wrong.

There's this understanding that the shipper/supporter is delusional while the one who stops shipping is the rational one. From what I've observed throughout time and mostly now, that is a false distinction. The so-called rational fan makes use of fiction just as the shipper. The difference is in purpose. One talks about why the supposed romantic relationship is real and the other tries to refute that. But both categories seem to need fiction in order to build their arguments. That is because none of them have access to someone's private life and relationship, so the gaps need to be filled with speculation. There is no right or wrong version here, despite how much the idea is being pushed. And me writing about this won't make a difference. It's simply how the fandom works. The one who position themselves on the side of anti-delulu will always be seen as the less crazy one. The similarities will fade for the collective consciousness of the fandom.

I think it's difficult for a lot of people, regardless on which side they find themselves on, to accept that the option of simply not knowing is enough as well. Or knowing, but without getting anal about it. But it's hard and they write posts after posts, anons are sending asks over asks because there has to be a firm answer. Only a few allow themselves to be in between lines.

I'll bring back something that I always used to say. Shipping and involvement in the fandom is a lot more about us and less about the people we're talking about. It's about fullfiling some needs, of needing a community, of focusing on the idea of love. Those things can still be done in a way that still makes the experience enjoyable. But not everyone can and I'm not blaming it.

There's a way to just like how people behave with each other and imagine things without adding so much weight to it. Regardless of the true nature. It's our imagination, there's no need for a moral inquisition to tell anyone how to think or that they should stop thinking a certain way. Touching some grass is a cliche and an expression I ended up hating, but I do believe that being connected to discourse on a daily basis can really alter our sense of reality and what we consider to be real issues. We really should pay more attention to that and take some distance if necessary.

[dungeonmalcontent]

So, I'd like to showcase a few things that I've put on DMsGuild because there's a whole lot more now.

I want to start off with Grimdark & Dangerous. Follower turnover is pretty high on Tumblr, and people go inactive pretty quick. So many people that see this will not be familiar with G&D. It was a huge project for me and I am very proud of it.

Grimdark & Dangerous is a 5e d&d homebrew book available for purchase on DMsGuild for $19.99. It comes as a PDF (for now) and is 159 pages of content geared towards gritty aesthetics. You can follow this link to see my full post on the book or the DMsGuild page here. It has a lot of content and is more than worth the price tag.

While G&D is my biggest item on DMsGuild, I have a nice handful of middle sized docs as well. These are mostly pay what you want (PWYW) titles and quite old. They are also more prone to errors and unintelligible text (where I just started writing and went into a stupor and created something I no longer fully understand).

+ Ancient Artifice Primer for Modern Practitioners (PWYW) - A magic item crafting system which can allow players to create magic items with some degree of value based balancing. It doesn't cover as much as it should in my opinion and is one of those unintelligible texts. However, I do still appreciate my very limited world-building of early runic magic and early graphic design work.

+ Better Backgrounds: 5e Character Building Alternative (PWYW) - A short book on how players can build characters without relying on race based ability score increases. I built on this premise in Grimdark & Dangerous and I'm still quite proud of how I did it in Better Backgrounds. This is a much rougher document than G&D and the writing has a handful of errors, but still decent.

+ The Inheritor: An Artifact and Exploration Class (PWYW) - A homebrew class option. I always say that if you want to play in a game and have a strong connection to the setting, run vestiges (Critical Role), or have a complex backstory this is the class for you. Inheritor characters come with a prebuilt artifact which functions as a growing magic item. You get to customize the item and there is a lot of variability to what your item can do (also includes a modular builder if you aren't very creative). Still pretty proud of this.

+ Mystic Revised (PWYW) - A full remake of the mystic UA class using my own opinions of what it should be. It's based, roughly, on the Nen system in Hunter x Hunter. It's a pretty fun class, but is not very mystic/psionic-y.

+ An Outcast's Notes on the Plane of Pensos - A Planar Adventure Setting for 5e (PWYW) - Don't pay money for this one unless you really genuinely love it. It's an outline and not worth much (IMO). Technically, it can't really even be sold on DMsGuild because it constitutes a homebrew setting (which they don't allow). I created it because I ran (and still do run) this setting and figured it could be a fun thing to share.

+ Plague Pestilence Parasite (PWYW) - A disease book that introduces new mechanics for how contagious diseases spread and how they can be integrated into 5e adventure settings. It also includes a handful of new diseases of varying danger (not all of which are actually threats to player characters). Still a decent book, though I now recognize it lacks some clear writing and has a handful of errors (I may come back and redo this book at some point).

+ Plague Pestilence Parasite: Avolakia Overrun (PWYW) - I don't think I'm really fit to write actual adventure modules, and this book is why. It is an adventure module written to use the rules in Plague Pestilence Parasite. It is still technically an open beta test. It's not unplayable, but I don't think it represents an adventure that players would latch on to (feel free to prove me wrong).

+ The Emissary: An Extraplanar Class (PWYW) - One of my first docs. It's a homebrew class heavily inspired by the Fate/Stay series (has nothing to do with any of the core themes/tropes/abilities of any Fate title) and is actually way more fun than it may sound. The premise: you get a little pocket dimension to store things in and it gives you a variety of powers (the ability to make a little nature preserve, become an auto-crafter, or be Gilgamesh in UBW and launch items at people).

Then there are smaller docs. These are moderately more expensive than most of my short docs (will list those later) but have a significant amount more content than my short docs. These are more recent docs and I generally have higher opinions of them because I was more skilled when I made them.

+ Grimdark Puzzles ($5) - An extension of the themes present in Grimdark & Dangerous. This document contains three (technically 5-6 depending on how you think about it) puzzles that present unique puzzles with dark aesthetics. I really like this doc.

+ From the Dwarven Vault ($1.50) - An item collection themed for dwarven cultures. This does rely a lot on dwarven stereotypes in fantasy, but I did get to bring in some fun things (like burial armor and the DUBA) that I think most people would really appreciate having in their games for lore and aesthetics. Also includes some content for rune carving.

+ From the Elven Vault ($1.50) - Like FTDV, this is a collection of items themed for elves. However, this one is a bit different. While Dwarves are smiths and warriors, elves are crafters. Not just of metal, but most mediums and particularly with mediums that take a great deal of time. If you like crafting in campaigns (if artificer is your favorite class), you want to take a look here because I added in crystal singing and there are three new sets of artisan's tools.

+ Lich Minions: A Lair Building Guide ($2.50) - I really liked making this doc and I am very happy with it. This is a guide for making lairs when your BBEG is a lich. It includes a variety of undead themed minions and how they fit into a lich's minion hierarchy. Each minion has some unique difference from their generic variety or are outright unique, they all have stat blocks. This is a really good resource if you want to do a short dungeon run campaign or a siege campaign. I plan on making more docs like this and I really enjoy this format.

Finally, I have my short docs (there's a lot of these). For simplicity I'll break these into two sub-categories: "Encounter With" and "Subclass".

The “encounter with” docs are short docs that include information on a unique or updated monster, a specific NPC, or a type of NPC. Each is given a stat block, has an outline of what kind of hazards are in the same area as this creature, and lists what kind of loot you might be able to gather from encountering this monster. These encounters include:

+ Archchancellor Ensiid

+ Dracolich Gollryn

+ The Athach

+ The Beholdra

+ The Boom Goblin

+ The Chaos Beast

+ The Destrachan

+ The Drow Paleweaver

+ The Introspective Terror

+ The Lifeblood Magus

+ The Musclemancer

+ The Non-Phaneron Beast (note the cover of this doc is intentional, as the beast does not have a visible form)

+ The Pale Widow

+ The Silkscale Coiler

+ The Soliptic Nightmare

+ The Sunken Effigy

+ The Venomous Plesiodrake

+ The Werewolf Lord

(I feel like I'm missing one...). All encounters have a $0.50 or $0.75 price tag depending on if the encounter features an original or converted stat block.

The subclasses are just that, subclass docs. I really love making subclasses and I try not to burn out on them because I have so many subclass WIPs I want to do. These subclasses include:

+ Druid: Circle of the Grove (Plant druid. Why doesn't this exist already?)

+ Druid: Circle of Witchcraft (Discworld witches, love this one)

+ Fighter: Blade Drifter (I just want to link a song from the Sonic Riders franchise here, but they're all so corny)

+ Ranger: Hell Skulker (nine hells/abyss ranger, also really like this one)

+ Warlock: The Greatwyrm (DRAGON PATRON! Why doesn't this exist already?)

These subclasses all have a $0.75 price tag. I will probably be making a lot more of these, they just take a bit longer than the encounter docs.

[the--journeys]

Talk Shop Tuesday: as someone relatively “new” to the fandom, tell us more of what you thought you’d find vs. what you did (aka more thots on the tags of the woobified peter post)

hooooooo boyyyyyy.

Peter Parker has always been my Boy. As someone who read the comics first, to find out that most comics purists hated MCU spidey was so surprising to me, because while there are Many problems with the MCU adaptation of Spider-Man (many of them revolving around Tony Stark, yes) I still think that MCU Peter has the Essence?

MCU Peter dies and walks it off. Gets a building dropped on him and walks it off. Almost gets shot point-blank and walks it off??? To log into tumblr.com for the first time in many, many years and see MCU spidey largely regarded as some uwu, noob of a character was cognitive dissonance.

Until. I read a few fics! And suddenly it all made sense.

I still don't trust comics fans who hate MCU Peter for uwu reasons simply because that isn't Him, and that can be true while also being annoyed at the way fannish works have bred this misconception of who MCU Peter is.

Writing MCU Peter into a world where he calls Tony Stark "dad" or calls the other Avengers to come save him at the drop of a hat is not illegal. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and interpretations of media, but I PERSONALLY believe it's a disservice to Peter Parker's character to file down his nails and teeth because doing so erases not only his competence and tenacity but also! His flaws!

Most (I'm sure there are exceptions but I'm yet to see them) of these worlds created to showcase MCU Peter Parker as a soft li'l bean do not allow Peter to keep his ego, selfishness, or even his optimism? He is a "perfect" little child, a kid with a boatload of trauma but whose coping mechanisms have been changed from kicking the shit out of criminals to??? cuddling?? on the couch??

It does not make sense. To me. In MY mind palace. Peter Parker is a fascinating character (and has been since his conception decades ago) in large part BECAUSE of his flaws. To take them away leaves a character who is boring, flat, and also... Not Peter Parker lmao.

And on TOP of this, to have hate directed at MCU Peter not because of how he's actually portrayed but because of how fandom has massacred him and to see how that hate gets translated into cries that the MCU has "ruined spider-man," or is "the worst spider-man adaptation" when it's the only Spider-Man adaptation to feature POC in really any sense, and especially as Peter's friends/love interests/supporting characters? side EYE.

I love me some media critique! I am a believer that Disney made so many Wrong choices with the MCU, with Spider-Man in particular. But so much MCU Spider-Man critique is actually fandom critique without being labeled as such, and it has an effect on attitudes regarding characters who are portrayed by POC. MCU Spider-Man doesn't do right by its POC lmao, but fandom's psdeudo-straw man hatred of MCU Spidey Isn't Helping.

All this to say, I avoid teen!Peter now in fics now unless I recognize/trust the author, and MCU critique is only as good as the author's understanding of the actual MCU versus fandom's portrayal of it.