#am abt it. and no matter how much ‘exposure therapy’ I have.

[what-even-is-sleep]

Craziest advertising flaw I’ve seen in my life is: it’s impossible to look up “spider catcher” or even “spider catcher for arachnophobes” without EVERY. SINGLE. PRODUCT. having a blown up picture of a spider in it.

[phagodyke]

was gonna say smth else but this turned into a vent sorry everyone just ignore. typical weekend post on this blog u know how it is here we go👍

[aayakashii]

I remember you did something kind of similar already, but I was thinking what if Vagastorm had an S/O that can or likes to carry them around sometimes? :3c

Omg I am obsessed with your art btw 😭😭 I love it so so much, it always makes me laugh!!!!

And yesss I did it here!! Which is wow a LONG time ago so I'd love to give it a go again, with a fresher opinion on them all hehehe

Vagastrom with a S/O that loves to carry them around (with pictures ?!)

Alan

He's absolutely horrified with this situation

Please put him down

Doesn't matter if you're EXTREMELY strong, he still thinks and acts as if he could hurt you even if he's not doing anything

Literally the type of guy that needs to go through exposure therapy in order to get used to the most minuscule touches

So you'll have to work hard until he allows you to carry him around sometimes

You can begin slow, after he's used to you hugging him

You can go for a hug, squeeze him tight and then finally lift him for a few seconds

He'll still be alarmed, but slowly he'll get used to your random bursts of affection that lead to you carrying him around

Once he's used to it, however, he thinks it's actually kind of relaxing

Feeling weightless for a little while in your arms is an unexpected bonus of his relationship with you

And he won't lie that it brings him great comfort that you're strong

Don't get him wrong, he still acts as if you're easily breakable

But maybe not as much... Just a little bit 🤏

Alan before he got used to being carried vs Alan after he got used to being carried

Leo

Oh he LOOOOVES it

But only when he wants it, of course

As soon as he realizes you are strong enough to carry him around, he WILL be using this opportunity to be as lazy as possible

What do you expect from the guy who is plenty capable of doing anything with his ghoul strength but still asks Alan to open cans for him 😭

You will become his little lackey whenever he wants to be carried and you will 100% like it

Some of those weird cats are going around cleaning the dorm? Get up and carry him somewhere else xox

He found a new trend on tiktok abt partners carrying each other? Come here real quick and let him film a new video for his feed thx

Now YOU want to carry him out of nowhere when he didn't ask for it??

Now that's some audacity

Be ready to either be pushed away or to have some bubblegum stuck on your face for a long time 🫶

He's like a poisonous animal, except instead of shooting out venom when he's distressed, he shoots out hazardous, life-threatening bubblegum

But hey, you should know better...

Don't pet the cat if the cat doesn't wanna be pet, duh

Leo when he doesn't want to be carried vs when he wants to be carried

Sho

He finds it extremely embarrassing

No, you don't understand. He LIKES it. And THAT'S why it's embarrassing.

When you come running towards him while he's working, hug him tight and then lift and spin him around...

And he knows he's blushing like a fucking school girl in front of all of his customers..........

Please stop 🤚

Actually, no. Don't stop. But please do that in private so he won't lose face in front of his customers.

Especially in front of that kid from Frostheim who he almost beat up. How is he going to defend his pride when he's tucked all comfortable and cute in your arms, being held high???????

Toxic masculinity aside, he loves to be carried by you

Loves to feel like you like him so much that you can't help but hold him so tight like that

He does the same to you and soon it becomes a competition of who's gonna carry who first when you two meet afterhours at his room

His favorite thing, however, is when he manages to kiss you while he's being carried

If you're going to make him all flustered like a little lovesick dumbass, then you bet he's gonna do the same to you 🫵‼️

Sho when he's screaming inside and blushing bc you're carrying him in public vs Sho when you two are alone

[bbluesrreality]

!! This post may be hella rewarding to read for hypnoswitches !!

(TW discussion about CNC, and baby’s first attempt at hypnotically triggering speech somewhere in this post even though it’s mostly just a horny rant and possibly confusing brainstorming session!)

Thinking abt the role of eye contact in hypno and directing focus and how eye contact in general is intense for me because there’s information in my eyes about the way I’m thinking, right, so, the concept of eye contact being (consentually, pre-negotiated, you know the drill) forced on me is as violating as being forced to speak. When I look in someone’s eyes I do feel responsible for their emotional well being- to make a face of disgust, or simply to not make a face that is communicating a positive feeling enough for the other party, can be received as hurt. But forced eye contact uniquely doesn’t have that catch... if someone’s making me look, it makes no sense for them to be offended at any reaction I have, voluntary or involuntary, because I have the security that no matter what face I make, there isn’t something I can do “wrong” that will make them less interested in me, a possibility that usually that makes me really nervous in the game of flirtationship, or even just platonic socialization. (and an anxious cycle of thought that keeps me from initiating much socially or sexually with others) I haven’t experienced much forced eye contact because when I want to stop looking at someone’s eyes, stop communicating to that level or stop being responsible to them in this conversation as far as processing emotions they may have trouble with or find frustrating, I simply look away. Or if I simply want to keep a feeling private- or if I am embarrassed about the way something has made me feel. But forced eye contact…,

Eye contact that I have been completed to maintain is a new kind for me, a face-to-face communication that releases me from the responsibilities of having to stay interesting, beautiful, kind enough, whatever, for somebody to continue making that communication with me.

If a hypnotist were looking me in the eye and compelling me not to look away I think I would feel, for the first time, the freedom of feeling like I’m not going to be judged for whatever genuine reaction I have to their actions. It’s not that that the judgement is a true, constant reality for me in social situations, but the fear of it is!!! This approaches an exposure therapy related to my social anxiety, and even though it’s an activity I think would feel good and maybe help my irrational fears down the line, the legitimately medical and therapeutic intention for me in this makes me wary of asking a kink hypnotist for intentioned play like this, maybe it’s totally appropriate but maybe there is therapeutic training a hypnotist should have to do something like that, that they might not have or be informed about how to do effectively or safely- and I wouldn’t know the difference as I am new to this genre, and practice, and community. I can’t stop thinking about this shit though.

The thing entertaining my thoughts about eye contact in hypnosis kink for me right now, is that the vulnerability in that particular activity is necessarily mutual. (Unless like, tinted sunglasses are involved) If I’m looking a dominant in the face I do feel a power in being able to read and understand their expressions, and their excited reactions to… whatever’s going on with my body does make me feel really good, like there’s a counter spell I’m casting to theirs, like they can’t even resist doing some projection into my pleasure, following me into the hypnotic spell they created to help ME to feel good in the first place. There’s a fun opportunity for switchiness in this!!! The concept of someone staring at me, and talking to me with the intention of hypnotizing me, only to realize that as they’ve been focusing my eyes, I’ve been helping them find focus on sensation too. To be a subject who has enthralled someone back, to hypnotize the hypnotizer feels very meaningful to me in relationship to the politics and optics of desire. In relationship to other kinds of CNC- this feels related to the play of a dominant being so overwhelmed by their own desire for my body that they “can’t overcome their carnal desires”, even at the expense of their submissive’s (consentually, pre-negotiated, you know the drill) cries of protest or protesting physicality.

If you feel like it for me-

Imagine, as a dominant hypnotist who is open to sharing power, pulling somebody under, heading their little moans, getting hard or wet or whatnot, feeling them relax into your words and obey, and breathing more slowly, evenly, intentionally with them. You guide your hands on their body by what you assume would feel good as a submissive subject, and it becomes visceral. When they gasp as you caress their nipple you gasp a little too- are you imagining it? Can you feel it a little yourself? How close can you get to your own orgasm in your pants just by watching yourself play with them, not even being touched?

You’ve told them that when they look into your eyes they find themselves unable to move, but you just want to stay there too, the changing expressions they can’t seem to control are too fun to watch. Now- they’re riding the top of their breath, those shallow pants and you know they’re so, so close, you don’t want to breathe all the way out until it’s happened either, you meet them there, bringing your face close in front of theirs, their body emitting a beautiful, sweaty heat that YOU caused. And as they…

“Uh- pl, ple- unhhhh ohmy, ah-pleeeaa, please let me cum canicum please please pl-”

Are you also on the edge? If I surged forward in that moment, kissed you to complete myself, would you too feel completed?

If you’ve been in control of yourself this whole time, why can’t you look away as I cum? Are you hypnotized too, or something?

Ehehehehehehehhehe thisss is what is getting me off today. Give me a new kink and I will find a new convoluted way to top from the bottom.

I don’t know if I would really have it in me at that point in a scene to break free of a hypnotic suggestion that I couldn’t move, again, I’m new to all of this. I don’t fully understand it and I’m just really horny and fantasizing atm. I would love to hear what some experienced hypnotists and hypnotees (?) have to say about amm my thoughts here. Especially other trans people who have thought a lot about the vaaarious gendered dynamics and commentary about gender and gender roles that this type of play brings up for you, and how you use this tool in a way that feels fun and good and empowering to you! Most of the power play stuff I see in hypno content, text and video, is very one-way, very, “the hypnotized succumbs to the control of the hypnotist” which is kind of… the whole premise of the activity so I understand why the online hypno play I find has very little play outside of this black and white, one-on-one dynamic. There’s something about “winning” hypnosis like this though, like “beating” a game that’s intriguing to me. Idk if it’s the brat in me or a dominant side I don’t fully want to accept because being a kink dom and doing it well is…. Sooooo much work and responsibility. I’m also really interested in the control dynamic if a dominant top has hypnotized a switchy sub into doing sexual things to another sub. I’m also not a dom so maybe projecting what I would want into the dom experience by making it more submissive, so maybe hypnotists in general, would not be interested in something like this, like the feeling of total control they get from hypno, and don’t particularly feel like messing with that.

I think I’m trying to find how I want to engage with the cultural context of this kink as a trans man who makes porn. There are some t4t gender affirming hypno things that sound fun for me in the way of feminization despite being a trans dude who is not into misgendering or detrans. To “feminize” me into being a pretty boy affirms for me that I have not lost my beauty in transitioning, or that that beauty has not become any less valuable despite being a man’s prettiness instead of a woman’s. A lot of this material also assumes the subject is starting from manhood, thus the underlying assumption that I am somebody who is NOT feminine enough, actually turns around into feeling gender affirming again. I know this is weird and convoluted again, enough that I would only consider this type of play with someone who is trans themselves AND who I’ve talked to thoroughly about exactly the boundaries I’m interested in. If done wrong, this could be come pretty hurtful to my ego pretty quickly. At the same time, there’s a general forcemasc body of work and aesthetic stuff that I really like, but some of it gets unironically mysoginistic in a way I’m not interested in participating in. The essay I’m writing now is, in part, a response to some writing I found on forcemasc on this app the other day. I don’t need to put down women, or play into the understanding of them as a secondary class below men to be affirmed in my own manhood, nor to I particularly want to be humiliated for the things people find feminine about me. Maybe some things that people code as feminine, like physical weakness? But my interest in a strong man and a weak man fucking is about the fun of being pick-up able during sex and the um, gymnastic and athletic activities that become possible when a dom can easily hold me up or maneuver my body himself, it doesn’t have to do, for me, with my proximity to womanhood even if this is what some other people find hot about the same dynamic. Because my proximity to womanhood, though, is what a lot of people praise me for in my erotic content, and there’s a lot of M/F hypno out there, and the sissificafion/bimboification subsets of hypno kink are very widely visible, I kind of don’t want to make a purely submissive hypno vid with my cis partner? I don’t worry about the way he would think about me, but I want to think carefully about the optics of the imagery I would be putting out. I don’t want to be encouraging any genuine “trans men are just holes/ you are built to receive sexually because you have a vulva” messaging, but due to my personal tastes of bottoming sexually, and also the way people have told me they perceive my body and what they are attracted to me for, I think I would attract an audience that is into that kind of aspect of this thing. I am trying to include a subversion of this conclusion and a gender affirming aspect of this play that could involve taking some hypnotic power back, while still being legible and hot to other people into this kink, and that involved being in conversation with the large body of work related to it available on the internet, such that hypnokinksters will be engaged enough to subscribe and get the full vids. I just find some aspects of that large body of work frustrating and not hot in a politically distasteful way. In no way do I want this message read as judgement for people whose play is not actually harmful, I just find it personally uncomfy, but I do want to acknowledge that some dynamics and themes found in widely availible play can have negative real-world consequences, and I am disturbed by the possibility of how hypno can be misused to perpetuate violence against marginalized people, particularly submissive women in intimate relationships, and as somebody who wants to be showing off my sex on the internet, I’m deeply invested in making sure there’s no way I will contribute to that harm.

Credit card processors fucking hate hypno anyway so creating content around it might be playing with fire a little bit. Def not on OF, I’ll have to look into other sites and perhaps alternative language to promote with.

This is a long post with a lot of different ideas in it and it’s pretty unedited so sorry for any typos but thank you for reading! I hope I made you horny or provoked in you some interesting new thoughts about the world! If you feel like you can answer any of the questions I’ve brought up please do help me out! I’m in an information sponge phase of this rn. I wanna find an experienced hypnotist I like and trust to try eye contact stuff like what I was talking about here in person eventually, but I also just want to hear more from hypnokink people about what is exciting about all of my concepts to you and find where our interests intersect! Idk if I’m looking for a scene but my DMs are open for hypno rants. Or hypno kink resources you wish someone had directed you to earlier. Thank you for reading you’ve been so good for me I mean oops who said that I’m not a top… unless…

[lostandfem]

hhhh i feel like we agree on so much i just. im “TIF” ig, more specifically FTMTFTMTFT?? and w confirmed prenatal androgenization + dissociative disorder linked to onset of puberty. i have literally tried everything i even did IV ketamine treatments, electroshock therapy. testosterone is the only thing that made me feel like i wasn’t. playing the sims. trying to live from the inside out. idk how to even explain it. if u have dysphoria ykwim probably. the only other times ive ever felt ok were when i was starving myself to the point of producing little to no sex hormones. i feel like a lot of ppl— especially with endocrine-disrupting chemicals becoming more of an issue— are struggling with degrees of genuine sex based dysphoria from prenatal EDC exposure. ik that sounds conspiracy-y but the WHO even released a study recently linking them to GD and intersex conditions. anyway i havent even socially transitioned this time because ive realized idc about what i’m seen as or called i simply just. know in my head what my body should look like. i was also intersex and forced on fem hormones at puberty so maybe its related to that but. i wish radfem spaces were less hateful towards transmasc female ppl. the rhetoric abt our bodies (and in turn abt unmodified intersex bodies bc i wouldn’t have been feminized originally without hormones) is really gross and just shows a deep seated hatred of sex non conforming females and as much as i recognize and hate the biosexism of amab trans ppl and the overall trans community. i just cant feel safe as an intersex snc female so its just like. No Community For Me, i’m too trans for the terfs and too terfy for the transes. sorry i didn’t mean to rant its just. the climate is so divisive rn n im struggling with being radfem but also like. clearly having biosex dysphoria that i have tried literally everything to eradicate. you dont have to publish this i simply needed to tell someone who would maybe get it and you seem to

i did these asks out of order and idk if youre the same person as the other ones rip. but yeah i hate teh “detrans people are mutilated” stuff too. ideologically i know radfems are supposed to support all females regardless of the state of their bodies, but i think youre right that a lot of them take the altered thing to mean youre an impure female. im really sorry you were forced on hormones, i really am. its hard to make peace with knowing that your body was altered when you wish it wasnt. intersex people deserve at least a choice in the matter, not that stuff being forced on them. they deserve to feel the sex dysphoria/dysmorphia without it being an inherently gendered experience too.

being in-between ideologically is rough. but sometimes its kinda necessary. belonging to yourself is important, so if you dont feel like you can belong to any one group, at least stand by your beliefs 💜

[seijorhi]

asks :)

Below the cut 💕

OMFG I JUST READ UR SPLIT FIC AND AHHHHHHHHHHHH IT WAS SO GOOD. Ur such a good writer I’m jealous

BBY!!! I’M GLAD YOU LIKED IT!!! but fr no need to be jealous it’s just some horny ramblings 👉👈

I just wanted to say that I LOVE your haikyuu fics! Especially the Oikawa/Iwa soulmate au one! Just a quick question tho, would their darling be able to turn the duo against eachother? Like maybe she/he/they prefers Iwa more than Oikawa and that could lead to some competition?

ok i’ve talked about this a little bit before in another ask but my tags are a mess and i can’t find it but tbh i think it would be almost impossible for their darling to actually turn them against each other - even in a tiny way just because their own relationship with each other is rock solid. Iwa knows how to deal with Oikawa at his worst and vice versa. if you do end up showing preference to one over the other - say you cling to Iwa because he doesn’t go as hard on his punishments or Oikawa because a pissed off Iwa scares you they’re gonna notice, and there is nothing like a little exposure therapy to cure your fears.

Inquiring minds need to know: does the slasher trio fuck you in front of their victims? When they’re alive? When they’re dead? Both???

Bruh.... I think you know the answer to that ;)

I just read Final Girl and I just wanna say that it scared the shit out of me??? I rarely watch horror let alone slasher movies and most of the time I imagine what would happen if they keep one of their victims and your fic just damn. It was scary good

you have no idea how happy that makes me?? because like when i write fics i’m trying to convey emotions and build tension and stuff but until somebody else reads it you never know if it’s actually worked?? so this makes me all 🥺

Yo I just read your Shiggy fic the chikan and boy oh boy I am a huge fan of it. He’s so gross but it does something to me and I don’t know why but I’m here for it. Also I love your writing I may or may not have just binged your blog but it was so good and I just could not help myself 😅, anyway I hope you have a good day!

SHIGGY SUPREMACY!! no but i took so long with that fic and now i just wanna write a bunch more creeper shigaraki i love him sm! anyway thank you fo being such a sweetheart - i hope your day’s going well too!!

Idk if it's thirsting hours, but I'm a horny bastard, so I'm just gonna express myself. Every time, I watch Ushijima show emotion and get excited about volleyball, I think about Outrunning Fate and daydream about the kind of face he would make while he rails a resistant, crying reader. And I feel like Tendou would just watch his facial expressions for a while because this is a side of Ushi he's never seen, and he just wants to admire him. Thanks for coming to my TED talk. @ks350

so it’s not exactly a secret that Ushi’s a little... stoic, but with things he genuinely cares about - volleyball, and you guessed it, his adorable little resistant soulmate - that’s when he lets himself soften a touch, smiling easier, seemingly without even realising it. He tends to get a little carried away when he’s fucking her because he’s honestly just so fucking content, this is exactly where he’s supposed to be and nothing else matters, not even your pretty tears and soft whimpers for him to stop. Of course Tendou’s gonna watch!

Okayyyy so I just read Split and, as always, your writing is superbbbb. Osamu acting like he was innocent in the whole situation? Atsumu being the sadistic little shit that he is? 💯 My brain is just full of thoughts of the Miya Brothers that I decided to read their Soulmate AU this early in the morning and I noticed how the party was set in the new captain's house.

And OMG as third years Atsumu's the new captain of Inarizaki and holy fuck there's a huge possibility the reader, their soulmate, just lost her V card in either of the twin's room or bed. Wouldn't that situation be a cluster fuck that drove them both crazy to do those things at the end after denying reader? Goshhhh I love this little subtle details in your fic. You are such a genius writer that endless possibilities are available to be interpreted by us readers. Thank you so much Rhi 💖💖💖 @pamdamonyum

👀 sqirugpq3urnioklnjk you’re a sweetheart 

but can you imagine if it was Atsumu’s bed and he was the one to find you and the soccer captain? because like i genuinely debated about having them kick his ass and i think in that circumstance... not even Samu would be able to hold him back!

❤️❤️😍😘💕✌️

I love you too, you funky little anon

Ok omg split was amazing! I have to share smth tho when my bro and I were kids (like pretty young), when one of us did something “bad” we’d be like “no that wasn’t me it wasn’t me it was my evil twin,” and like then we’d forgive the other and shit talk abt our “evil” versions bc it wasn’t the “good” twin’s fault lol. So the “Osamu you promised!” “Osamu isn’t here rn,” had me dying. Like so perfect. What bs. Then the end with Osamu “I couldn’t stop him” miya like oh yeah ofc just your evil twin nothing you could have done 🙄 like it was so perfect, I loved it!

aw that’s actually really cute tho! i honest to god think that Osamu’s worse in this one - at least Atsumu never pretends to be anything other than what he is. Osamu’s just as toxic and warped, but he acts like the hero, like it wasn’t his obsession that started this all

So, I just read the Dear Old Friend Osamu drabble and I couldn't help but grin. The implications I got from it and the initial one-shot were the following;

1. Atsumu is a titties man, considering how much he bit and teased them in DOF.

2. 'Samu I don't have a favourite twin how dare you is an ass man considering how many words of that drabble were dedicated to his thoughts lingering on the titular dear old friend's arse.

And I'm just LIVING for it because they really do complete each other in that regard. But also because 'Samu strikes me as the kind of guy that likes face sitting and spanking his partner while they sandwich his face between their thighs. And Atsumu strikes me as the kind of person that likes just randomly fiddling with his partner's tiddies because tiddy = fun.

Also, hi! I love your writing! Pretty sure this is my first ask, even though it's not, really??? @pavlovs-titties

ahh you’re so sweet, thank you bby!!

and yeah, Atsumu’s definitely a tiddies kinda guy and Osamu prefers ur butt (but also not me writing that little drabble because i wanted to tease the idea Osamu have his turn leaving his mark on the reader by spanking her till she’s nice and sore 😉)

Baby, you were amazing ❤️! I don't know how I still get surprised by your awesomeness, but I do. You're amazing and no one can tell you different 🥺🥰

💖💖💖 sdfghjhgj you’ve got me all blushy and soft, thank you!!! 

the jokes on you tho because in actual fact you’re the one who’s amazing?? ily!!