#although im sure people have said that already and fully believed in it

[in-zwielicht]

twitter algorithm thought i wanted to see shit about ed(s) day ruined faith in humanity lost forever

[allmcl]

WICKED GAME │ Castiel Veilmont.

A quiet afternoon with your boyfriend couldn't seem like a better plan. But when two people are ridiculously in love, they always find something ridiculously more romantic to do.

pairing. castiel veilmont x f!reader

genre. fluff, suggestive.

setting. established relatonship, both are aged up.

content warning. kissing maybe? and castiel loves you too much :( (that needs to be a warning)

author’s note. im kinda nervous to post this 😭, pls tell me if you liked it, enjoy!!

The day was horrible, and all I wanted was to return to the comfort of my room and never leave. But since I discovered the comfort of being with Castiel in his house, simply talking about everything, resting, or any relaxing activity, I understood that there was nothing better than that.

"Feel better?" Castiel asked in a raspy voice, as if he had just woken up.

His finger gently tracing the curve of my back under my shirt sends an electrifying spark through my body. "A lot." I snuggle a little closer to him.

"I'll beat whoever hurted you." Castiel murmured.

I laughed. "You won't."

"Well, not if you don't tell me what happened."

I grimace. "It's not that important, seriously."

"If it concerns you, it's important to me." I don't see his face but I'm sure he's already frowning.

I managed to lean on him and stretch out a little and get a better look. I moved a little closer and my fingers stayed busy untangling the strands that fell into his eyes gray eyes, shining under the sunlight. "You look very handsome." The compliment slips from my mouth before I can think.

Castiel pauses for a second. "Do not change the subject." I would have believed him right if it weren't for the way his ears reddened and his expression relaxed.

"I'm serious." With the golden light from the window illuminating his features, and giving an even brighter shine to the red of his hair, I dare to say that I have rarely seen him so angelic.

He complains. "I knew you were obsessed with me, but it's starting to get embarrassing." Finally his smile escaped.

I rolled my eyes. "Wathever you say..."

A few minutes of silence were enough for the fatigue to dissipate a little. Between talks, Castiel and I were fully up and we were talking about everything and nothing, as usual. At this point in the afternoon, the radiant glow of the sun indicated that it was about to set.

With his eyes still closed, Castiel spoke. "I think about you a lot when I listen to music."

The idea took me by surprise and I couldn't help but raise my eyebrows in surprise.

"Oh yeah?" I smiled.

"It's a slow song."

"I thought you only listened to rock bands."

I have shrugged. "Not since I've known you." He confessed and seemed to avoid looking at me for a couple of seconds.

I stretched a little closer to him. "Can I hear it?"

Castiel seemed to hesitate for a moment, but soon agreed. He shyly reached over to turn on a music player and the song began to play. I know it! If I remember correctly, I may have mentioned to him at some point that it was my favorite. "Wicked games" started playing, and I couldn't help but get carried away by the melody.

"Come on!" I said, and got up from the bed. "Dance with me!"

Castiel shot me a horrified look before starting to complain. I slowly started dancing, and I offered him my hand to take, but he seemed prettysure that he wasn't planning on dancing with me.

"Please.." I wishpered.

Castiel could never resist that, so I noticed how he sighed heavily and barely stood up from the bed to join me. Although at first his movements were a little reluctant, he began to play along when I took him by the hands. We intertwined our fingers and I noticed how his grip was so delicate, but still firm.

The now dimly lit room gave everything a comfortable, homely look, and I felt like the time was frozen, and, for a brief moment, it was just the two of us. Castiel didn't dare say anything, but I could tell he was enjoying it too from the way he was watching me. His eyes shine and I can't tell if it's because of the light or some other reason.

"I wouldn't do this if it weren't for you." He reproached with a red face. I smiled and stood on tiptoe to kiss him.

Although I expected the same gentleness with which he held me, Castiel caught me off guard and instead grabbed me by the waist tightly, pulling me against him. Our bodies continued to move to the music, only this time we were melted into each other. The strong smell of his cologne intoxicated me, and his body heat relaxed me. His lips kissed mine a little too roughly, but he always did it that way.

His hands caressed from the curve of my waist to my back and higher with constancy and softness, just like the gentle swaying of our bodies.

"It´s nice to have you close..." I quietly whisper, breaking the kiss for just a few seconds.

In response, I feel a warm kiss on the crown of my head. Being so tall, he always used to do that instead of kissing my cheek. My body gives up a little, and I lean against his chest. The song is still playing in the background, and I feel how his chest vibrates while he hums to the rymth of the song.

"This…is nice" He said softly. "Even if it's ridiculously romantic."

I smiled against him, and from the way he pulled me closer, I knew he had noticed. I always knew Castiel wasn't that good with words. But he made an effort for me.

And that was enough.

©allmcl !

[ovinophobia]

Ok my biologist brain needs to be satisfied:

Does your body work like a human's ? Or something else ? Like, are your bones shaped in a different way ? Do you have a heartbeat ? Do you even need to eat ? Or are you just... Void inside ? Like no organs ?

And is it the same for Alternates ?

oh my GOD I LOVE YOU FOR THIS I'VE BEEN WANTING TO EXPLAIN THIS FOR SO LONG HSHS

wayy too long explanation under the cut

answering this ooc,,,,

gabriel has smtn fairly close to the same biology/internal systems that a normal person would have, except that its more mechanical (i'm not too sure that makes sense ,,)

it's immune to (most) disease, has an infinitely slower metabolism (hence the need to not eat too much, since it takes so long to fully break down.. that + a general disliking for how it feels to eat/drink)

his bones are the same as a persons, although, a bit more ?? flexible?? if that makes any sense ??

theyre more flexible/weaker so he can change his body shape, height, facial structure, etc,,,

(sorta following what i said about his body running a bit more mechanically ↓ )

gabriel ONLY has vital organs (excluding his stomach, but tbf, it's small enough to the point where it can barely eat a sandwich)- he didn't see the others as "fit" so, as a result, got rid of any non-vital organs (spleen, appendix, reproductive organs, etc)

he does have a heartbeat, but it's much closer to artificial in order to appear more alive than he is if that makes any sense ??

gabriel wouldn't die entirely if his heart stopped beating (as i said, it's more artificial.. it's already barely beating as is) but he WOULD have to take a day or two to get his body up nd running again

he still does need to eat/drink occasionally, but doesn't most of the time if he has the choice not to (this doesn't have a specific reason other than his preference)

i feel some of this doesn't make too much sense biology wise but i do NOT know how to elaborate further for gabriel specifically ,, im going off of the fact that hes lucifer nd wtv, so rather than him needing a fully functioning body, he made/chose this one to tinker with until it looked decent enough for him (i.e.: removing the organs because he didn't believe he would need them)

ALTERNATES RAFH

they don't have blood,, or at least, don't bleed as easily as humans do; they CAN be harmed, although it takes a lot to do so (i.e.: setting an alternate on fire would probably do a little bit of damage, but not to a fatal point)

their skin has a really rubbery consistency, making it hard to pierce !!

they have blood vessels, veins, wtv, but they walls around them are a lot thicker (like a giraffe ^_^)

they don't have any bones (no i don't know how this would make sense movement or structure wise, but they just,, don't,, if they did, then it'd only be the spine, skull, scapula, sternum, maybe pelvis??) so that they can take whatever shape/form they like, allowing them to turn into people, animals, blobs (???) whenever they wish

they don't necessarily have organs? mainly to prevent problems when changing form/because gabriel imo didn't believe it to be efficient nor necessary + they're still artificial.. they're not real people, nor entirely alive

they eat, but only for the pleasure of eating ! it doesn't serve a purpose whatsoever

alternates are virtually just mass,, something to take up space- they don't have much of a sentience, either; they were made for one purpose (inflict MAD onto people) and follow that said purpose

there are gonna ofc be some cases where they gain sentience, occasionally morality, except extremely rare (simple defect that gabriel ignored/assumed wouldn't happen)

PLEASE tell me if i left anything out. i adore explaining this typa stuff thank you so much for this ask ohmy god

[petrichormore]

(Another ramble incoming - this one I’ve been sitting on for a bit. But it’s about Bebou & the French. And the jail incident. And also bla bla bla this is about the characters)

I might be wrong but I really think that if some of the french agree with q!bbh about the government being bad/anarchy being good thing… it’s not because Bad managed to convince them that q!forever is some horrible dictator with his wily demon cunning and manipulative silvertongue or something. it’s because. they just. agree with his views and sympathize with him. Like they just sometimes think Bad has a point, is the thing. Now I know Bad likes to spread misinformation but he rarely does it in a way that can really be taken seriously, or have any big effect (with a few… exceptions).

Bad likes to jokingly blame Forever for like anything and everything but if anyone actually presses him about it (I’m pretty sure pierre, antoine, and etoiles all have to varying degrees) he’s pretty quick to emphasize that he trusts Forever’s judgment and moral compass.

Or he used to. Until he got pushed into a cage trap. It’s clear he lost a significant amount of trust in Forever and everyone else who was involved with that. And he suspected Forever (or Cellbit) of framing him, but I’d say that’s relatively reasonable considering, from his perspective, they jumped to a conclusion with no proof. He doesn’t understand why they wouldn’t hear him out, so he’s looking for a reason. And he’s telling other people not because he’s trying to spread misinfo but because that’s just what he believes and usually, he’s telling people because they’re asking him.

Anyway, Pierre didn’t really steal the waystones because he automatically believed everything Bad said about Forever being a dictator immediately and with no hesitation. If he accepted or encouraged what Bad said, it’s because he probably already agreed to some extent. Pierre, Antoine, Etoiles - they’re smarter than blindly accepting the truth from badboyhalo the Chronic Gossiper. And at least 2/3rds of them are also convinced that Bad and Forever are dating - so they’re not taking what Bad says about Forever that seriously.

If you ask me: Pierre did it because he was probably already more politically aligned with Bad’s anarchist ideals than he ever was with Forever’s and, most importantly, because he witnessed Bad get jailed unfairly with his OWN. TWO. EYEBALLS. LIKE HE SAW THAT. HE WAS THERE.

How did he know Bad was framed? He TALKED TO HIM. He went to his base and had a conversation with him and of the two (count it with me - TWO) people that actually heard Bad out that day (Foolish and Pierre) both of them came out of the conversation believing he wasn’t the culprit. Wouldn’t you know it - communication solved that conflict pretty fast, but Bad didn’t get a chance to communicate to Forever or anyone else because they almost immediately dogpiled him. And Pierre saw that happen.

And I’m pretty sure he also saw Forever hold a vote and then accept that Bad was guilty of a crime. A crime. That isn’t illegal. That he didn’t even do in the first place.

So. I’m sure you can see why Pierre might feel the urge to defend Bad - maybe even from Forever specifically, and of his own volition. Although I can’t say stealing all the waystones and rearranging them into a pentagram above Forever’s house was a particularly reliable method of doing so, nor can I say Bad really needed the protection - Forever had no malicious intent and was fully trying to be fair. (can you tell im a q!forever apologist? because if you can’t: he did nothing wrong. Maybe one day I will make a giant post about how much of a q!forever apologist i am).

Am I making sense. At all. It’s 2am. And I’m getting the sensation that I’m missing something with this one but I’m too tired to correct it so I’ll look at it later.

[anotheroceanid]

Hi, first of all, I wish I could kiss your brain and hands for the wonderful creation that is your fic. I am in love with your writing and world building, sometimes even obsessively so and I can't wait to see how you continue to develop it. I'm usually a ghost reader because overcoming my shyness to interact with my favorite authors is difficult, that said, there's one question I've had in my head since I found out what happened to the world in WTHB What happened to the other religions, is it something you'll address or will it just not be touched on at all? Catholics, evangelicals, all of them. It must have been an absolute shock to learn about the Greek gods, although with the world destroying itself I don't think they had much time to fully assimilate. Sorry for the long comment, it took me a lot to get up the courage to write to you and excuse my English, it is not my first language.

This is a very good question, I’ll try to answer it in the most concise possible way. First things first, and I already said it somewhere else in my page, I decided to let the Greek gods be the only gods in the WTHB because I felt it’d be easier to write and I was bothered with the idea of other deities just sitting and watch the apocalypse happen.

For the people in WTHB, learning that their beliefs weren’t true was definitely a shock. I mean, I come from a catholic family and I know my grandma would've had a heart attack. But the thing is, some people just stayed in denial until they couldn't anymore.

When everything went down, some places reacted better than others, this is for sure. Speaking of my country which has a strong conservative presence that uses religion as a tool, that was most definitely a blow. That's why I said some people refused to accept. Despite how many years already passed, some people still refuse to believe.

At the same time, other people got a bit too passionate over the “omg there are real gods” thing. In both cases, it sometimes is a problem for the Greek city-states and New Rome.

Cults are definitely a problem in the WTHB world, both for denialists and worshippers of the gods.

Despite the division of Greek X Roman territory, they can't really take care of every little village or community, so every place you go people are doing their own thing, in a way. Sometimes they're harmless… sometimes, not as much. (that's why Annabeth doesn't want to cancel the festival, because religion is a really delicate topic, and people get violent over that).

In the Greek cities, they tried to fight this by adapting the gods’ worship into things 21st can relate to, so instead of trying to replicate what ancient people did, they adapted practices that already existed in people’s lives pre-2012. Besides, nobody is really expected to worship the gods, as long as people can live in peace.

I don't know if it made any sense, but its something easier to show in the fic than to explain here.

Makes me very happy that you commented 💕💕 im usually shy too, so I get you. And don't worry, English ain't my first language either. Thanks for reading the fic 💕💕

[ethernetmeep]

went and offered up seeds to this bird in a tiny little bush… brown & white, truly minuscule in size. unsure of species. fidgety. nervous, unsure of itself. when i move to look back at it, it runs away; any slight movement startles the small creature. on my way to leave the outskirt of the pond, a different pond from the one near where i live— its one which has one of those mechanisms which help fish spawn, i believe,— i make sure to leave plenty of possible small treats for that singular bird. sure, the mallard and swan get some too, but… i believe that one has a small nest up there somewhere. i wish for it to be okay. i too know what its like to be small in a big and all encompassing world.

speaking of world, went to the environmental club. offered up ideas of stickers of endangered animals in our state & possible bracelets. idea responded to via snapping of hands and the singular term, ‘fire’. might participate in a beach clean up.. i find this calming. realize i am only known by my deadname to them, all i will ever be to most. this ruins some of the joy i hold, making the experience more or less a bit tainted. nonetheless, it still is one which i enjoy.

beforehand, i was doing as i always do; crying. crying, and in a bit of pain. got a sort of… pep talk from my english teacher. stood beside him as he told me of positive affirmations and whatnot. i asked him what he thought of me. he said i was a good person. i was told this by three people today, actually, including him; still, its hard to have the sentiment stick. i don’t fully believe it, but i won’t argue on it. he has told me essentially what everyone has told me; i think in the end i am the stubborn one. this tracks, considering the expanse of water i wanted to visit was a part of a fucking golf course. stupidity at its finest.

more stupidity includes: bashing ones head against the wall, staring down at a graph paper and thinking ‘yeah, im in hell already’, the singular word compass, picking at skin until blood draws, what have you.

now i sit and, although less stressed, still worried beyond belief. i once again feel as if i am not allowed to do something which i would enjoy.. i know i am, but now it looks almost fake or preplanned. i just want to have fun, i just want to look at art! i just.. want to have a good day. one good day is all i ask.

i… can only hope tomorrow will go okay. i may leave my house exceptionally early, just so i can feel at ease. i will wear a nice outfit but i will not wear either suit i own, nor will i wear the bedazzled fish collared shirt. i should give that one a small break, i think. i may choose cardigan and short sleeve. i am petrified of the short sleeve… more so petrified of possible perception. i am easy to see through.

i recall something my teacher would probably say. stick it to the man, he says! i….. i don’t… i don’t think i want to do that. i would preferably eat pineapples and have a nice conversation. preferably. i just want everything to be okay

i stare at myself in the mirror. DO. NOT. CRY. TOMORROW. i tell myself vividly. time will only tell if i manage to follow through.

nonetheless, i will prevail, blood soaked and trembling.

[cyb-organ]

whaddya think the fates of the yabusame sibs will be in 3-2? will they have any major plot impact? will they have one big defining moment? will they DIE?? idrk so I wanna hear the expert’s thoughts!! (and do you think the reko/Alice decision will have an impact on logic route?)

oo this is interesting! okay i have quite a few thoughts bear with me here.

also just for ease, i am only referring to emotion route unless i say otherwise

oh and im gonna put it all under the cut cuz its pretty hefty i apologise

will they have any big plot impact? i personally believe that every character has pretty big plot impact, but i know thats not what you mean so i will give an actual answer. im not sure if they will have MORE plot relevance than other characters, especially since theyre only there in one route (although, i have seen people theorise that emotion and logic will have seperate plots completely, which is interesting). i think plot wise, there isnt alot that they CAN impact yk? midoris gone, hinakos gone, and those were the big moments. i mean, that was a huge moment in alice lives route, the hinako reveal was such a huge plot moment, and to my knowledge it wasnt as big boom powpow in rekos route as it was in alices. i think that reko'll have one of these moments (please she needs a w). we still dont know her first trial. i think we'll find out what it is in 3-2 (the same applies to gin and kai but this is about reko). and i feel like alices first trial was pretty plot relevent so the same could apply here. as for alice specifically, i have a feeling that the memories that safalin erased will come into play. yttd has established a pretty big theme of humanity/how can humans be altered or changed and alice erasing his memories of reko is a pretty huge example of this. i highly doubt that it wont be relevant. also again, hinako moment was a pretty big plot impact. im not saying that he won't have any more plot impact, but i feel like in 3-2 he won't have a single big reveal moment because, well, it's already happened.

big defining moment this is just me elaborating slightly. i think all the first trials we dont know about will be relevant, and that includes reko's. on top of that i do think that while her arc is mostly coming to a close, i think she very well could have a big personal character moment, this may be wishful thinking cuz i love her and want to see more of her but whatever. to be honest, i don't fully see HOW her first trial is going to be relevant, but there has gotta be a reason for it being hidden this whole time. alice's first trial seemed irrelevant until it wasnt so! alices big moment, as i said, has gotta be related to his memories. i refuse to believe that he just erases his memories and moves on with his life, it just seems like a copout and i trust nankidai more than that!

will they die? to be honest, i dont think so. they very well MIGHT but i dont know! i think there will be at least one route where they die, but i think itll be avoidable. again. very well may be wishful thinking. but truly i think that either of them surviving to the end, possibly even escaping, would be a huge win for their character arcs. particularly alice who has very little to get back to. for him to fight on, to move forwards, despite knowing this? i think that'd be hella cool thematically! the idea of hope, and the idea that being human is to fear death are pretty big themes for the game, so for character like alice: a prisoner, who's already lost his sister and hasn't talked to the rest of his family in years, to not give in and to escape anyways would really fit into that. he doesn't have too much to live for, but that doesn't mean he should die, yk? (also would be an interesting parallel with kanna). reko, similarly but also on the other hand, HAS people to get back to, she has her band. and her fans. shes a public figure, her kidnapping was probably a big deal, making national news headlines, so it'd be nice to see her escape, also playing into the idea of hope both for her personally, and for everyone else; everyone in the death game and, yeah, her fans. additionally, because she is famous, her escaping could be detrimental to asunaro. she could out them completely as criminals, it would be a huge fucking deal. realisitically, im not sure if thats going to happen but its a possibility!

will choice affect logic route? honestly i have NO idea. i think most realistically, no, considering alot of people play chapters seperately to each other and will be starting from 3-2 without any link to any previous saves. there wouldn't be any point in having a "who died" choice for the yabusames at the start of 3-2. hopefully speaking, maybe. i think it could be interesting seeing how it affects sara, especially because she was incredibly close to reko. reko's death in logic route would obviously hit her alot harder than alice's so it'd be interesting seeing the differences there, but very likely the choice won't matter. emotion route on the other hand, i have a feeling theres gonna be a big difference in 3-2 between alice and reko lives, not sure what it'd be but. something's gonna happen. might be first trial related who knows

this is like half "what i think will happen" and half "what i want to happen" and i cant tell which is which.

tldr: alice gets his memories back, we find out rekos first trial, there is at least one route where they survive their respective routes, and the choice is relevant in emotion (all theory)

anon i am literally so thrilled that i am considered the expert is this, i really hope all of this makes ANY amount of coherent sense. 🫶

[tera-91]

Ranting and its only the beginning of June

The last while has been … interesting.

I haven’t heard anything from the manager so I am still in the dark if I still have a job. I feel like people are second guessing my choice to quit my job. Even if they think it was the “right” choice I keep getting asked questions. Like do you have anything lined up? Do you have another job? What are you going to do? And a bunch of other similar questions.

I cant tell if these questions are infuriating or just plain exhausting. Quiet honestly, I haven’t even applied to another job. Ive looked but haven’t applied. Its not because I think I might still have one, I think Im just decompressing.

Like I was burnt out.

Or maybe I was just overwhelmed.

I feel like I’m getting more motivated. Getting more inspiration.

I may not have finished them all but in the last almost month since I informed those that needed to know that I did not want to work there any longer I have started at least 8 stories. Im not sure that I started 8 stories in the last 6 months, maybe year.

What you just read was from several days ago. At this point I don’t even know how many days ago.

Most of the days seem to pass without getting much done as far as “physical” things so it is a little difficult to keep track.

I heard from that manager.

Jackass.

Spent easily 4 to 5 times longer on the phone than needed just to be told there are better options than me. Basically due to my physical limitations (I am not legally disabled) and my personal obligations I said before day one I couldn’t work past a certain time during certain days of the week.

So I told the higher up manager what this one said. Mostly because I have work with this manager for a long time, so I was just giving a curtesy heads up. This manager really has no say as far as that managers people so I wasn’t really expecting anything, not wanting anything. Plus at this point I had applied to a handful of jobs and put this manager as a point of reference.

No way will I ever use that manager as a reference. He is just enough of a vindictive individual that I don’t trust giving that information to perspective hiring people to speak to.

Well this manager said for me to come in. Maybe I could do something under a different manager. While not as many hours. It would just be something to keep me from fully being out. At least until this manager thinks things can be patched with that manager.

I am not hopeful.

Honestly, I don’t want to patch anything up.

I worked one shift already and know that I cant stick around.

At least not doing that.

If this manager ends up talking to that manager and that manager calls me saying things can get sorted. I honestly don’t know if I would.

The clock has been reset.

I will have some income from that shift anyway.

I have a little time before the next shift to keep me in the system.

I know what I want to do but not how to do it. I feel like I would be letting this manager down. Feel like I will be breaking a bridge. Not completely severing it. Just leaving it broken. Not quite safe to travel back across.

Im sure if that manager ended up leaving and this manager was still around, although rumor is they wont for much longer, this manager would bring me back. Little to no questions asked.

My friends have told me to do what feels right. Taking a break would be ok.

I believe them. I just havnt been able to push myself over that hurdle.

I don’t know what is stopping me.

Maybe a fear of rejection from another job opportunity I have in mind. Maybe a fear of failure when it comes to my book.

I still haven’t touched it.

I seem to be stuck in a loop.

Get up, take care of my furballs. Try to get some stuff done around the house or run errands but end up just binge watching shows that I need to catch up on. Then I feel this urge to be productive. When I feel like it would be safe to tackle things. By then though its late afternoon which is usually when I feel drained.

Then I wonder why did I not try to be productive earlier. When I didn’t feel as drained. Even though I know at that time I was lacking motivation. With one pup still recovering from surgery I didn’t feel safe leaving the room. Later afternoon is when they are also drained and sleeping.

Frustratingly.

Even when I do get the urge to do something and have the mental and physical capacity to do something. I procrastinate.

Before I sat down to write this I spent the better part of 30 minutes cleaning up a small area in my room. Then I checked to see if there were any more jobs to apply to and got a snack.

Really, I shouldn’t be writing this. But I haven’t done an update in I’m not sure how long.

Other than feeling like I could go take a nap my brain is telling me that I should be doing one of a handful of other things.

One thing I know cant take me long. Maybe 20 minutes. But no longer than 30.

Part of me feels like it is too loud. Or Im just too tired.

The next day is kind of better.

As of writing this I havnt done that thing yet but I probably will here soon.

Im still kind of tired but I feel like I cant start it until I give the pups their meds.

Finally heard back from the vet.

Not a lot of conclusive results for my big pup. Not sure why the heart did what it did but its responding to the meds. Just needs to have more frequent visits to make sure it stays that way and needs to lose some weight.

Which we have been trying and for the most part were successful. 2 pounds in 9 weeks. But then my little pup needed surgery and is not allowed to do a lot of stuff. So instead of walking several miles a week we might get just one in. I have a buggy that luckily the little one won’t jump out of and just sits as we stroll around. Its so hot that we can only go first thing which is not always an option.

I am going to get to work on some things now. Now that it is June im sure the weather is in full swing for most of everyone. Stay safe and please stay hydrated!

[charlewiss-writes]

make damn sure / charles leclerc

masterlist

day 19: wonder (part of one-word november prompts!)

word count: 1.5k.

pairing: bff!charles x reader

summary: being the hopeless romantic that you are, you've been dreaming about your special other your whole life. you're talking to your best friend pierre about the dream guy. what if you already knew him?

author's note: not proofread, so for sure many errors lmao. hope its still understandable (? also, im sorry for the delay! will try to have day 20 ready soon but its one prompt i really like so i dont want it to be short :( ill see what i can do! thanks for sticking with me through almost 20 days already!!

since being childhood friends, charles, pierre and you were inseparable. going to school together, joining them on their karting days, them joining you in your school plays. you were always there for eachother, without doubt. so when things started to get complicated at your house and you decided to move, they were 100% in. and that's how you ended now, two years after living with them, in the couch while talking to the frenchman.

"don't you wonder sometimes?" you had started the conversation, voice dry after hours without saying a word. it went like that sometimes, all too busy with their stuff: sometimes, even though you lived with two other people, thanks to their jobs, it seemed like you lived on your own. pierre straightened himself a little on his seat and turned his body towards you, so he could look into your eyes as he said "about?".

immediately regretting your decision to bring this topic to the table, you tried to back off. "well of course you don't, you already have a girlfriend" jokingly, you said. that only seemed to interest the boy in front of you more, being one that didnt like to leave things unresolved. "what are you talking about?". after knowing you for so long, they already knew you were a hopeless romantic at heart, but still, it made you nervous to talk about it out loud, being aware that it could seem ridiculous to others. "promise you won't laugh about it".

"when did I laugh to you?" he said, tilting his eyebrowns like you were telling him something unbeliavable. but you two, having the brother-sister relationship that you had, knew that he was blantantly lying as he always made fun of you, as you made fun of him too. seeing your glare, he laughed before saying. "fine, I won't, i promise". still, you took a bit of time before actually telling him what had been on your mind all day. "I don't know, I started to think about how everyone has met their significant other but I can't seem to find them".

"what if you did already? you know plenty of people".

you fully laughed at him, with no means to offend the frenchman. it truly seemed hilarious to you that he would believe that. "I think I would have realised if a certain person with all the qualities that I look for passed in front of me, pierre. I'm not dumb".

"you sure?"

and if look could kill, you would've been charged for murder. "you're being awfully mean to me today, pierre".

"it's cause you're so blind sometimes, like you purposely don't want to see". he looked pissed off now, and the change between his playful tone and this much colder one threw you off. "see what?" you asked.

"the way he looks at you".

it was a common discusion betweet you two, ever since you realized that you didn't love both boys the same. and although yeah, you cheered for their wins and stood through their hard times the same, the smile that adorned your face was different when you were greeted at the other side by the grin of a certain monegasque, who you also lived with. but for you, he was completely off limits. and you were okay with that, with being alone on the sidelines cheering for him, not expecting anything else from him. "oh shut up. you know we're just friends".

"if telling yourself that lets you sleep at night, go ahead. but you have to know that its okay to fall in love. if it goes wrong, i'm sure we can figure it out: you won't lose us. but what if it goes right and you're wasting your time? won't you like to know?".

"know what?".

the voice of a certain someone startled you. it wasn't like you didn't know he was in the house, but after a few hours asleep you had forgotten about him at all, otherwise you wouldn't be talking about this topic in the middle of the house. "know why she likes to talk about deep topics when we should be asleep" he quickly managed to answer, and even though it wasn't a lie, it felt wrong to lie to charles like that. "but why don't you two continue with the chat, eh?, i'm sure charles as more answers than i,he's smarter after all". the monegasque laughed at that and punched his arm in his way out, while he entered the room and started to get comfortable in the same couch that you were sat in.

"i love talking about deep topics, why don't you ever talk to me about it?" he sounded genuinely hurt, like the fact that you preferred to talk about certain stuff with pierre over him really bothered the ferrari driver. "thought you were asleep, charles". and it wasn't a lie.

"don't you trust me?"

"don't be silly, cha. I didn't want to bother you, that's all"

"you could never bother me".

after a few moments in silence, where he directed his eyes towards the ceiling instead of looking at you, he said, softly this time, like he truly didn't want to wake pierre up with his tone. "pierre's right. we need to talk. i want your opinion about something". at that, you clearly became more interested in whatever charles had to say. it had been a while since you two really talked, since he was always away, and when he wasn't, you were the one with the busy schedule. "it's really really really complicated, but i think i like a girl, and i don't know how to talk to her about it".

ah, that's it. that's your worse nightmare coming true, once again.

obviously, being the pretty boy that charles was, always so well manered and the perfect boyfriend that a mother could ask for his child, it wasn't the first time that he had a partner. but as the time went on, you knew he was getting more serious about the whole dating thing, and it scared you to think about him settling in for someone lese. someone that wasn't you. so, after all the years that passed, it still hurt quite a bit to hear him talk about other people in the same way you wished to be talked about.

after a few minutes where you didn't say anything, too stunned to actually answer him, you started to get self concious. obviously, he for sure saw how your face dropped when he told you that. would he realize that you had feelings for him all this time? would he feel betrayed? after all, he thought that you were only his friend, and thats why he was telling you this in the first place.

"you don't get it, do you?"

you furrowed your browns, now confused at what he was implying with that last sentence. "what do i have to get?".

he laughed about it and took your hands into his, to gently brush your fingers over your palm. "i'm talking about you, silly".

"what do you mean? why?".

his deep greenish blue eyes looked straight at yours, and it was impossible to pull away from his gaze. he softly started to answer your question. at least the one you had told him about, since your brain was already a mess with all the questions you had for him. since when? how didn't you see it before? did pierre knew about this? was that why he always talked to you about it?

"cause i've been in love with you for my whole life, more or less. i was just too scared to ruin things between us, but pierre talked me into it. said our friendship is bigger than anything that life could throw at us. and im confident we can work things out, you know? we have known eachother for so long. i know you like the palm of my hand. and you know me the same. please, don't tell me you didn't think about it, at least once, y/n".

you smiled, knowing about the endless times you had fallen asleep to the thought of you two together. wondering exactly this, if you could ever work out. how, each time, pierre and you talked about what you were looking for, you were, knowing or not, describing the boy that was in front of you, looking lovingly into your eyes. "i think about it all the time, cha".

"and why didn't you say anything before?" he reached for your face, gently caressing it with his right hand. "cause we're both dumb, i guess. but i think it's for the better, no? we've grown so much. we know how to make this work"..

"i'm gonna make damn sure, love".

[hanazuma-inactive]

ifhy. (nsfw) dabi x bottom!male reader

pronouns: he/him

warnings: hate sex, a lot of cursing, a little bit of degrading, fucking on a counter (?) idk if that counts, and implied violence a little

a/n: sorry this took a while to write i was passed out for the past two days 😀👍

_____

ever since you entered the league of villains you've hated everything about the man. the cockiness, the way he talked, even the way he smiled, though he barely did. you wanted to prove you were better than him. due to the fact that he had a flashier quirk than you, he received more attention from tomura than you did.

everything about dabi pissed you off.

you weren't very subtle about it either, you made sure that dabi knew you didn't like him. In fact everyone in the league knew you hated his guts and they didn't want to get in the way of you two either, just so they don't get hit by the crossfire.

you challenged him one time during another one of shigaraki's meetings because he was taunting your abilities in the mission tomura assigned you to. the fight was pretty bad and thankfully kurogiri was there to stop you guys or else the hideout would've been burned to crisps in the matter of seconds.

believe it or not, there was actually one thing you hated more than dabi. it was how much you wanted to fuck the man. everytime you were with dabi, you were practically undressing him with your eyes. his tall and lean body, those ocean eyes you could melt in and the fact that you could see his pecs slightly due to his clothing.

you didn't want to admit it but you couldn't deny your own desires. not saying you would volunteeringly ask him to fuck you but if the oppurtunity came up you wouldn't say no either. there were times you touched yourself thinking about the black haired male deep inside you stuffing you full of his cum. he turned you on so much and you couldn't deny it.

it was another day were shigaraki excluded you from a mission. you didn't mind too much this time since you didn't want to go anyways. shigaraki and your ideals weren't similar but he recognized your strength and you recognized his authority.

you were resting at the bar table in the hideout and fixing yourself a drink. you knew kurogiri had to have some good booze hidden here somewhere. while ruffling under the counters you heard slow footsteps coming down the stairs. the person you wanted to see the least appeared in front of you.

"what are you doing back here, aren't you supposed to be with them?" you said in a cold tone.

"they don't need me anymore, they've got it handled. shigaraki's plan also failed once."

"wouldn't be surprised."

"fuck is that suppose to mean."

"i said what i said , burnt face."

you felt the atmosphere in the room tense up and so did dabi. you both stayed silent for a few seconds until he spoke again.

"real rich coming from someone who's been eye-fucking me ever since we entered the league together."

you were startled by his response. did you make it that obvious? you stopped looking for the alcohol and stood up.

"so what if i did, huh? i still fucking hate you, i don't know who in the right mine would want your cocky ass here but i guess some people just don't see how much of a piece shit you can be."

you could feel it in your bones a fight was about to go down. dabi wasn't the type to stay silent after you insult him. well, if he does try something you were ready to face him. backing off from something like this wasn't your style.

dabi walked closer to you and put his hand on the counter.

"i always thought you had a pretty face, what a shame it came with a shit personality." dabi said while cupping your cheek with his hand.

his touch felt so right against your skin. the male's hands weren't cold but it wasn't exactly warm either. you didn't know why it felt good but you didn't care either.

"don't fucking touch me, bastard." you said while slapping away dabi's hand.

you wanted dabi to touch you but you didn't want to admit it infront of him. in fact, he was getting too close to you for comfort and the tense atmosphere with just the two of you, him pushing you against the wall. even a nomu would know what he's trying to do.

“oh please, we all know you want it you fucking slut... you want me to fuck your brains out right on this counter, don’t lie to yourself.”

“don’t be so full of yourself, who do you think you are? just because i like your body doesn’t mean i like you.”

dabi turned around and started to walk away realizing you were being serious about this.

“then again, i'm not saying no. so if you want to prove me wrong, come and show me.” you said

dabi understood what you meant, he turned around and grabbed you by the waist pulling you in for a sloppy kiss.

you've never felt your heart beat so fast in your life before. you hands on his shoulders pulling him closer towards you. both of you struggled to take control of the kiss but dabi ended up winning this time.

after a few minutes the kiss broke and you wiped your mouth with your left arm.

"is that all you got bitch boy? c'mon there's no way you're this weak right?" you taunted

"you haven't seen nothing yet, you fucking squirt."

dabi said as he unbuckled his belt. you could see the thick outline of his cock under his boxers. it was so much bigger than you could’ve ever imagined all those times by yourself. dabi soon took off his boxers to show you the real deal. his cock was still half erect but it already looked too big to fit into your hole.

“you like it?” dabi asked with a smirk on his face

“tch, i’ve seen better.”

“oh? is that so.”

right after he said that, dabi grabbed your head and shoved it onto his dick, making you take his cock by all its length right away. you attempted to push yourself away but dabi’s hands were on your head the whole time. Soon enough you submitted to dabi and adjusted to his rhythm. after a while dabi finally let go of your head and pulled out his cock, this time fully erect. you couldn’t tell the exact size but it was practically double the size of what it was initially. during this entire time, you had an erection in your pants too. you were begging for a release preferably through dabi’s cock.

“c’mon sweet heart, we all know what you want. now show me that fucking ass and get on the counter.”

you stayed silent for a bit thinking whether or not to pass up this opportunity or take it. the decision was still in your hands because although dabi might be a villain he would never do something like this if he didn’t get their consent first. after considering, you realized this could be a once in a lifetime opportunity and agreed. you slid the bottom half of your clothing off and sat on the counter. you didn’t expect dabi for the type to ever get flustered but he did. when his eyes locked onto your ass and thighs his eyes widened just like when you saw his cock.

“bet you never had something like this huh~” you teased.

and just like your response earlier, dabi scoffed and said

“i’ve seen better.”

you were both impatient for what’s about to happen next. one person to be stuffed and the other to do the stuffing. dabi’s precum was the most lubricant he was ever going to use on you so without prepping he pushed his cock inside you. right away you felt a bit of pain under there but it quickly turned into pleasure after dabi moved around the area a bit more.

“f-fuck bitch… you’re tight huh…”

“nngh... tch, i told you AH-.”

“this is the good spot isn’t it~” dabi said as he pushed his dick further into you.

you moaned in pleasure as a response with grunts in between. you were feeling euphoric, this was the situation you’ve imagined so many times and now it’s finally coming true. you looked down at your own dick to see the tip of it leaking pre-cum. you couldn’t deny how good you felt at this point even if you wanted to.

“fucking hell… you fuck pretty good for some a-ah! who talks like a bitch.” you managed to make out.

“don’t talk with you ass full, slut.” dabi said as he yet again thrusted into you this time with even more force.

“and you wanted to deny it, look how good im making you feel. you’re gonna cum just from me fucking you in the ass.”

“you’re one to talk, i can feel all of your pre inside. i know you’re feeling just as good as i am don’t lie to me.”

you two gave each other a smirk as if this was some kind of competition of who can make the other person feel better. well it is, but in an aggressive way.

as both of you were getting close the moans and grunts started to become more frequent.

"hgh! im fucking cumming." dabi grunted out

"a-ah fuck! me too." you replied

the two of you came at the same time. pants filled the room with dabi still inside you.

"heh… not bad y/n."

"that's the first time you said my name, dabi."

"the same goes for you."

"i still fucking hate you by the way."

"the same goes for you."

[calamitydaze]

i think why people are defensive about the word neutral is because especially on twitter people are saying they are neutral but also actively spreading misinformation/victim blaming rhetoric on top of it, and so there's this notion and active history of neutrality being used to sweep this under the rug entirely and hate on the victims which is not what youre doing at all but that's sort of the way i see the defensiveness come in.

But i also will say that from my perspective regardless of what happened which we dont know for sure dream did admit the dms were real and in those dms were inappropriate messages to people who were minors and also admission that the priv snapchat was given to said minors (amanda). I think yes its okay to stay open minded and wait for more information but i do believe theres at least enough solid ground that the behavior was inappropriate. Even dream called his behavior "cringe flirting" which i took as admission he recognized his messages were flirtatious and those people were minors, so that i find to be inappropriate.

This is not negative towards you just thought id offer some perspective and such i dont think youre a victim blaming hater im sorry people are misinterpreting what youre saying but i hope this perspective helps.

it does, thank you for sending it in! i worry about this blog coming across as an echo chamber when it’s not meant to be that at all, so i really appreciate hearing from people who don’t like, 100% agree with me

you definitely have a point with “neutrality” being used to hide a lot of stuff that definitely Isn’t Neutral (i know i’ve seen it on both reddit and twitter, and i’m sure i could find it on tumblr too). i think for the most part, people don’t do it on purpose? i think because the reaction on one end of the spectrum has been so extreme, people think they’re being neutral by virtue of not being That and don’t notice when they’re slipping back around to victim-blamey rhetoric. not that it’s excused, people should be critically examining their own reactions as well as those of others, but yeah. i hope i made sense. and i’m really glad you don’t think i’m guilty of that! but if i do start spouting weird shit pls definitely call me out because i do actually want to be neutral i’m not just trying to cover my ass, and while i’m doing my best to keep it in check when i analyze the situation i won’t pretend i’m not internally biased

per your second paragraph though, i think you’re mixing up the facts of the case (understandably so, there’s a lot to keep track of)! the cringe flirting messages were from anastasia’s thread the day before, and dream explicitly said those Cannot have been him because he uses a google voice number that doesn’t have imessage. one could disbelieve him of course, but across both threads he has not confirmed anything except friendly and outwardly innocent conversations, and by extension the giving of a snapchat to amanda, but nothing that happened on it. to say he admitted to flirting with minors is active misinformation. (i could be pedantic and say amanda’s weren’t even fully confirmed, just that he “believes them to be true”, but eh that’s kind of irrelevant here). ymmv on the existence of the snapchat and that’s fine! personally, i think i’ve settled on the opinion that there was nothing wrong with the ig dms but moving to snapchat does cross a line that should be in place, regardless of what may or may not have happened there. inappropriate? for sure, and something that should be corrected (although according to his twitlonger, it already was). predatory? not inherently, and there’s nothing we know for certain that inclines me to apply that term

[aerequets]

can you give me some webtoon recommendations? name some of your favorites! :)

i am here to answer folks 😎

all of these webtoons can be found on webtoons.com! I'm not sure about the whole daily pass thing they've got going on (which sucks tbh) but like,,, you could probably find it online illegally. NOT THAT I CONDONE ILLEGAL ACTIVITY HAHAHAHA ᵖˢˢᵗ ⁱᶠ ʸᵒᵘ ˡᵒᵒᵏ ⁱᵗ'ˢ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ

I'll split these up between completed and in progress :) most are still in progress though

COMPLETED

1) Gourmet Hound (166 chapters)

this is like, my all time favorite webtoon. it follows Lucy and her quest to find all the chefs that left her favorite restaurant, Dimanche! it’s a really heartfelt story and the food illustrations make you really hungry, so make sure you have a snack before you sit down to read it. each character’s name is also food-related, so that’s pretty cool too! and the diversity in this webtoon is AMAZING. it’s the only webtoon i’ve ever read that has a hijabi character in the main cast. the development is done really well and it explores themes of loving and letting go. all in all, it has a bit of everything. i personally love food-related things, and this centers around it, so i was set LOL

(also a bonus is that this webtoon has NOT succumbed to daily pass hell, so you can binge read the whole thing. legally.)

2) Hooky (200 chapters)

if you like stories of witches, this is the one! the summary and beginning chapters are deceptively lighthearted. DO NOT BE FOOLED! the story really develops further on and explores numerous conflicts, a big one being (if i remember correctly) witch vs. nonwitch. if you like to see struggles between two sides, not a good-and-evil but just people-who-want-the-best-for-themselves-and-their-loved-ones type of thing, this is good for that. also, sibling love! the two main characters are Dani and Dorian, and while there is someee romance, i like how this story centers around the siblings first and foremost. ALSO THE ART??? I LOVE HOW THE AUTHOR DRAWS SETTINGS SO MUCH and am unabashedly jealous because i am completely incapable of doing so   just like,,,, even if the story doesn’t pull you in, you can at least stare at each panel for long stretches of time.

(unfortunately succumbed to daily pass, but you can read it on mangaowl or manganelo!)

3) Spirit Fingers (167 chapters)

aww, this one is cute. Amy is 18 and lacking in self confidence (her family definitely doesn’t help). but HEY she joins a wacky art club!! without her parents knowing!! HECK YEAH!! unfortunately it takes more than joining an art club for her to learn to love herself (it is a long journey after all!). i love this webtoon because it explores the problems of multiple people, not just amy: her high achieving brothers, her mother who had to give up her dream, the different members in the art club, Amy’s girl friends. the art is unique and has a cool watercolor-y texture! and the main couple is just adorable, too. if you’re an artist especially, i recommend this because that’s a big theme and you get to see these characters expand their art styles! which is very cool!

(you can read this one fully on 1stkissmanga)

now here’s where the majority of my recs are:

IN PROGRESS (all can be read on webtoon.com)

1) The Makeup Remover (currently 71 chapters)

i look forward to this every tuesday and friday because oh man!!!!!!!!! idk about you guys, but i am thinking about beauty standards A Large Amount of the time, especially when i consume media. and this webtoon is all about beauty standards (specifically in Korea, but still applicable like. everywhere). Main character Yeseul ends up having to partake in this beauty competition and, with her experiences through it, she begins seeing makeup and beauty standards for the huge role they play in society. i said it already but i LOVE LOVE LOVE this webtoon because it really challenges you as a reader to think about your own perspectives. why do we find the things/people beautiful that we do? what shapes our perception? how much of it is marketing, and how much of it shows in our daily lives? what assumptions do you make about people based on how they look? AGHH im sounding like an essay prompt instead of a reviewer but man. if you like webtoons that examine society through a critical lens (gosh i sound like an english teacher), this is the one. 

2) Odd Girl out (currently 261 chapters; on season 2) 

okay, first and foremost: if you’re NOT into long winded drama, this probably isn’t it for you. i will admit im not a fan of long problems that get dragged out, especially in a school setting, but i did keep reading this webtoon and i am glad that i did! the character development here is amazing and ONE CRUCIAL THING is that the whole first season (which is many, many chapters. at least over 100) focuses on the friendship between our main 4 girls. if you don’t wanna wait for a romance storyline (which comes in season 2), then you’ve gotta have the patience of a saint. i loved this though because lots of romance webtoons cast friendships aside or use them to further the romantic plot. platonic relationships are great to read about and this one does it masterfully! main character nari is resilient and emotionally strong, and it’s great to see her ruin her enemies

3) Cursed Princess Club (currently 110 chapters; on break before the final season)

this is another one about beauty and societal expectations, but in a fantasy setting! it’s really funny and the cast of characters is heartwarming. Gwen is a princess, but she doesn’t look like the typical princess. she accidentally stumbles upon the Cursed Princess Club, which is exactly what it sounds like: a club for princesses that have been cursed and are trying to find their self worth despite not being conventional princesses! now that i think about it, this is like a lighthearted mixture of Makeup Remover and Spirit Fingers. although while i do say “lighthearted”, this webtoon has its fair share of mysteries and exploration of deeper topics. but its funny throughout

4) Brass & Sass (currently 83 chapters)

ahh this one is really cute and the art is cute, too! i also like how this has a diverse cast. high schooler Camilla kinda sucks at band, but dangit if she’s not passionate. Victor is some type of musical prodigy but he’s a brass-hole (hahaha get it. no that’s not original i ripped it from the summary). now i KNOW I KNOW, the whole “perky girl and asshole guy” is so overplayed BUT DON’T FRET! this isn’t the type of story where the girl “fixes” the guy, or where the guy is an asshole to everyone except the girl. believe me, the character development and relationship development in this story is SPLENDID. there’s no real antagonist. it’s just a bunch of high schoolers trying their best to make themselves and everyone else happy, and that’s hard! the story is carried more by the characters than by the plot, but it works well in this case since the characters are strong and each one has a presence. 

5) Surviving Romance (currently 10 chapters)

this one is relatively new compared to my other recs but it’s by the author of the Makeup Remover so yaknow i had to hop on it. BUT IT IS VERY DIFFERENT! first off, it’s a horror, so keep that in mind. the best way i can describe it is a mixture of the standard “girl falls into a story” genre, Groundhog Day, and zombies. Yeah. Bascially, Chaerin is our main girl and she’s in a romance story that’s she’s read a bajillion times, so she knows the day has come for her male lead to confess his love! except he doesn’t! because he becomes a zombie instead! hahaha well that sucks! it’s only got 10 chapters but i am very into it, and it seems to be taking an emphasis on platonic relationships, so i am very closely watching 👁👁

6) The Witch and the Bull (currently 60 chapters) 

another witch story! and the art is GORGEOUS. more witch + nonwitch conflict, too! our main dude, Tan, is the royal advisor and he’s hella bigoted against witches. our main girl, Aro, happens to be a witch. and Tan needs her help to make him into a human again (because he got turned into a bull. that is worth mentioning). this is a very barebones summary and there’s a lot more that goes on, but that’s the general gist of the beginning!

ANYWAYS. this got very long, predictably, and i rambled for each title, predictably. i’ve got more that i’m reading, but i really like these 9! i also made comments on the art for a lot of them, which might not matter to some people, but i feel like my art was very impacted by each webtoon i read. if you’re an artist i recommend finding a webtoon you like and studying the art; try implementing parts you like into your own style! 

anyways, i am FINALLY done talking. bye yall 

[like-rain-or-confetti]

A Story (Alec Volturi x Reader)

You opened your eyes, sitting up straight. Your back was stiff. You were in your bathtub, fully clothed, soaked. The bathwater threatening to spill over and freezing. You frowned. “I need to stop drinking.” You grumbled before rolling out of the tub. You groaned, too sore to even consider standing up. You’d clean the mess later. You crawled into your bedroom before flopping onto the floor. This had to be the last time you drank, it had to be. Better ignoring that you definitely could have drowned, since you were so intoxicated that you tried to take a bath and didn't even take off your clothes. You couldn’t even remember the night before so really, it wasn’t worth it. Whilst you didn’t have a headache, thankfully, you just felt tired...and cold. Phone, where was it? You groaned, a sudden feeling you had left it in the bathroom. You didn't see it around your room and it wasn't in any pockets thankfully. With a sigh, you figured you couldn’t avoid the day any longer, although it would be very nice to try. Regardless, you slowly got up and trudged back into the bathroom. 

Your phone was on the floor, next to the bath. A couple of water droplets lay on the screen but remained undamaged...although it had twenty percent battery left. You had two missed calls from Alice. You checked your texts to find none. You decided to call Carlisle who picked up after two rings.  “Hello?”  “Carlisle, it’s (Y/N).” You said.  “Hello, are you okay?”  “Yeah, i’m good. I just...do you know if i was drinking last night?” Carlisle seemed amused. “No, why?”  “Oh, no reason. I just, woke up weird and tired.”  “Im sure you could have done that without alcohol.”You could hear his smile in his voice. You hummed in amusement.  “Are you coming to visit today?”  “Yeah, I can do that.”  “I just wanted to check since you said you would yesterday?” Carlisle responded. “I did? I must have forgotten but yeah, i can do that. I’ll come over later. I’m going to take a nap first, okay?”  “Alright, I’ll see you soon.”  “Bye, Carlisle.” 

When you arrived at the Cullen’s, they seemed as though they were waiting.  “The Volturi are coming to visit.” Carlisle informed you.  “The who?” You made a face of confusion.  “The Volturi.”  “I’m going to assume thats some vampire friends i don’t know about.” You shrugged. Carlisle turned to you with a look of confusion of his own. “You’ve-” He paused. Carlisle's eyes widened, a sickening thought rushed through him. Panic rushed through Carlisle realising the likelihood of his thought become more and more likely. "Stay here for a while. We have guests, I believe you'll have met them before." Carlisle swallowed hard trying not to scare you. You lightly shrugged. 

A group of seven arrived, all dressed in black and grey with cloaks, varying in the same colours. You could tell they were an older coven with how they moved. You were given their names and noted the odd looks they gave you. You figured it was down to being human, you were a big no-no from what you remember. "Do you know these people?" Carlisle asked you before putting his hand into Aro's in a weird bizarre handshake. You shook your head. "No. We haven't met." Carlisle inhaled.

This made Esme step towards you. "(Y/N), why don't you help me in the kitchen?" She smiled. "Carlisle will get our guests settled in before you make their acquaintance." You nodded. "Sure thing, Esme." Without a second glance you turned, heading for the kitchen, Esme sending Carlisle a glance. 

Half an hour passed and Esme led you to the living room where the Volturi awaited your presence. Your eyes immediately shot to Carlisle, nervous about meeting his friends but he nodded in encouragement. The leader in the middle was the first to greet you. "You must be young (Y/N), we've heard so much about you. We are delighted to meet you. My name is Aro." "Hi...it's nice to meet you too." You nodded. He held out a hand and you hesitantly reached out thinking it was a handshake. Instead, he cradled your hand in his own briefly. A flicker of an unrecognisable emotion passing his face before his wide smile returned. "These are my brothers, Caius and Marcus." The two men beside him nodded to you and you offered them shy smiles. He gestured to who you were told were their guards. "This is Jane, Alec, Demetri and Felix." You nodded. "Hi." You said nervously as the four nodded at you. Later that night you huddled into your seat. "So you guys have been around for a long time?" You asked looking over the Volturi members. "Yes. Quite." Aro smiled slightly. "Do you guys have any good stories? Surely you've got at least one after all this time." The Volturi looked around amongst each other, Marcus kept his head down whilst the Cullen's looked around uncertain of how to continue the conversation. Marcus spoke up, meeting your gaze. "I have a story. It was quite some time ago but I believe it's one our coven cherishes." All eyes were on Marcus, uncertain just what he was doing. However, you seemed pleased. "I'd love to hear it...if you're willing to tell it." "I believe it would be a good one to tell." Marcus nodded. "This is a story about a human we once knew, one who after all this time will continue to be very special to us." 

(Y/N) caught Alec in their sights as he approached the door to the spare bedroom. "Alec!" They cried out with a grin. "You're here!" "So are you." Alec said peeking around the door. "What are you doing here? You don't live here." Alec couldn't help the amused smirk building upon his face as he watched (Y/N) struggle to reach for something on top of the closet. "I'm visiting but...! I can't reach my folder! I left it here the last time I stayed over. It has all my documents in there." With a defeated sigh, (Y/N) began to drag themselves down the closet doors. "I'd offer my assistance but I don't think I can't do anything without damaging furniture." Alec pondered. Alec's eyes suddenly glinted, clearly having an idea. "Come here." Alec bent down. "What am I doing?" They asked with confusion. "You're going to sit on my shoulders and I'll lift you up." Alec responded. (Y/N) made a noise of protest but couldn't think of a reason why. They couldn't necessarily tell him you were too heavy, tall or would hurt him given Alec was inhumanly strong. "...Promise you won't drop me?" They asked him. Alec looked unimpressed. "I have no reason to drop you now, come on." (Y/N) whined quietly in defeat once again moving to Alec. 

As they got into position they looked down at him nervously. "You're sure I won't hurt you?" (Y/N) asked and Alec rolled his eyes, wrapping his hands around their ankles and standing up with ease. (Y/N) squealed, although it seemed Alec was right. He wouldn't drop them. "Oh it's all the way at the back, I bet Emmett did that. Can you take a step forward please?" Alec complied and suddenly the folder was in arm's length. (Y/N) grabbed it. "Thank you!" "Did you know that it's very likely you couldn't get down now that I have a hold of your ankles?" Alec smirked and (Y/N)’s smile of accomplishment vanished. "You'd get tired quickly." They retorted. "Would I? Shall we see how long I last?" Alec responded. "If you don't put me down, I'll eventually pee on you. It's inevitable." Alec immediately pulled a face of disgust, crouching back down and letting (Y/N) stand up.  "So are you visiting the Cullen's or have you broke in? Oh! Oh! Did you run away from the Volturi and so have sought shelter with the Cullen's?" They asked. He scoffed. "My coven is visiting to check the progress of the hybrid." Alec answered. 

Later that night, (Y/N) and Alec were outside, sitting on the Cullen's balcony floor. "Why do you need those? Those documents?" Alec asked turning his head towards them. "Oh, it's just stuff to keep the state happy. It's documents saying that Carlisle is my emergency contact and stuff, he's my legal guardian though I'm not living with him. I'm in contact with him frequently and he gives me money for my house. All of that stuff. Boring really." "You still haven't been in contact with your parents?" Alec asked and (Y/N) smiled at him sadly before shaking their head. "You should reach out, (Y/N). The argument was a typical one. They have no reason to hold a grudge against their own child for this long over something so trivial." "It's a little more complicated than that. Although I guess deep down, I like to think that maybe I do have their forgiveness." They admitted. "You didn't do anything wrong. Besides, for the last option, you could always make them forget the argument ever happened and avoid the topic forever." Alec smirked at (Y/N) who playfully shoved him. "Thanks Alec." They said with sarcasm. "It'll be okay, I assure you." Alec said to them. "They'll come around if they aren't already waiting for you to come back to them." 

(Y/N)’s gift was phenomenal. Unique but dangerous due to its impact. They could make people forget things, everything really. Whether it were, events memories or thoughts, none of them were exempt. The only person it didn't work on was themselves. Since meeting the Cullen's and eventually Alec, (Y/N) had better control of their gift making them a very tempting addition to Aro's collection. Although that was still very much in discussion. Whilst they'd have to be changed at some point, it wasn't consensus that they were to join the Volturi. As a matter of fact, it was highly debated among both covens instead. 

"You talk about my ability like you can trust me with it. I'm still learning, you could be forgotten at any time." Alec chuckled. "First of all, it doesn't work on yourself. Secondly, you don't forget someone like me." Alec's smile faded. "Not for good reasons, might I add." "Good reasons for me... you've been nicer to me lately." (Y/N) said. "I'm trying...it's not your fault you're human." Alec smirked slightly. (Y/N) narrowed your eyes on him playfully. "It's all I can ask." Alec wasn't the most open individual nor the kindest. He certainly had nothing nice to say about (Y/N) when they first met. Although over time, he gradually warmed up to them- even if it was reluctantly. Now (Y/N) felt like Alec understood them better than anyone in the world and accepted them. It made their bond to him stronger than most bonds could ever be. (Y/N) was confident that a piece of them would always be connected to Alec, nothing could divide them from him.

None of the Volturi really understood why Carlisle had a form of guardianship over (Y/N) and what a conflict with their parents actually meant for them to no longer be around their parents. Whilst the Volturi wanted to respect their privacy, it was important to them if (Y/N) were to become a vampire eventually. It was necessary to have the details. Although even being close with Alec didn't give them any answers as (Y/N) never told him any complete details. 

There was an argument about (Y/N) wanting to be independent, treated less like a child and since then, they hadn't been near them since. Whilst this seemed logical that (Y/N) left, it didn't make sense why their parents hadn't reached out to them in so long. So much so (Y/N) was convinced that they couldn't be forgiven. 

Marcus asked (Y/N) about their parents when talking one night. "Do they know about your gift?" He asked. (Y/N) wanted to wince at the reference of their ability being a 'gift' when there was very little actually pleasant about it. "No, they don't. I never told them and after that argument, I guess I had made up my mind they could never know."  "Do you miss them?" Marcus asked. "I try to forget about them if I'm honest." (Y/N) answered. This response made Marcus tilt his head slightly. They looked at him, really scrutinizing him. Marcus was the most kind and gentle of the Volturi leaders. (Y/N) couldn't help but trust him, especially after he came to defence of their friendship with Alec to anyone who questioned it. Marcus had always made it clear that the bond Alec shared with them was undeniable. "Can I tell you the full story?" "If you wish." Marcus said quietly. 

(Y/N) could remember the moment that their house stopped being your home. Everything was as it always had been. Signs of life, nothing missing from it's usual place. However, it was no longer welcoming as it had been before. Even the photographs of (Y/N) and their family, scattered around the place. Things were different now. Instead of a family, there were just memories of one. It took some time for (Y/N) to understand how their gift worked. Although they were forced to learn the hard way. (Y/N) had been arguing with their parents when (Y/N) said something about forgetting (Y/N) ever existed. Their parents did. They never had any children by that name. Nor had they ever seen (Y/N) before. All memories of them gone in a matter of moments. From then on (Y/N) could only see their parents from a distance, outside their house. Their parents wondered why they had pictures with the strange person in their house and got rid of them too. "I wanted to remember every inch of them as they were. Their eyes, nose, mouth, hair. Every tiny detail, because I knew after today. I'd never see them again." (Y/N) told Marcus. "Why are you so determined to pretend this didn't happen rather than embrace it and carry on?" Marcus asked. There was a moment of silence. Neither of the two looking at one another. "You rejected Corin's gift when offered comfort after your loss. Why?" (Y/N) responded. Marcus thought about the answer but it didn't require much thought. He had spent decades thinking about that decision and why he made it. "Because I wanted to feel the pain. I didn't want to feel content about her death." (Y/N) thought over his answer before replying, sadness almost radiating from them. "See that's where you and I differ. I want nothing more than to forget." Their voice was quieter as they looked down at their hands. It was safe to say, Alec was furious at (Y/N) when he found they had left out such an important detail when it came to why their parents didn't speak to them. (Y/N) had more than one chance to tell him and they didn't. It felt like a betrayal, like they had lied. Alec only ever asked (Y/N) to be honest with him, no secrets. This secret was a pretty big one at the very least. (Y/N), on the other hand, didn't think anything wrong with that. They were allowed some privacy like every other person. They were sure Alec didn't tell them everything so why should they share something they simply hadn't been ready to speak about until that moment. It was how the argument had began and it seemed the more defensive (Y/N) got, the more angry Alec became. 

"This isn't a big deal, you're making something out of nothing!" (Y/N) said with exasperation. "It is something, (Y/N)! You didn't trust me with the full story and you told Marcus! Even Carlisle knew!" "Carlisle had to know!" (Y/N) argued back. "If he didn't I'd have been taken by social services! I told Marcus because I was ready to talk about it and I knew he wouldn't make a big deal out of it! It was nothing to do with trust!" Alec scoffed sending them a sneer. That was when their anger had begun to really build. "Am I honestly supposed to believe that you tell me everything!?" (Y/N) snapped. "That's different! There are parts of my life that aren't necessary and would only scare you." "Like your complete lack of trust and hatred towards humans for being burned at the stake? Like the dark, twisted things you and your coven have done in the name of justice?" "You don't know what you're talking about." Alec said icily. "You're just a little human who thinks they know everything when they know nothing. I have given you no reason not to trust me-" "Alec, I didn't do anything to you! Ever! I didn't accuse you of witch craft! So what did I ever do to you like the rest of the human population!?" Alec laughed darkly. "Of course, you wouldn't understand. How could I expect you to? You're only human." 

(Y/N) was stunned into silence before fury took over them. "You are cold." (Y/N) said, anger and disgust in their eyes. "Cold and empty. So empty you have to suck out the life of everyone around you to feel even an ounce of emotion. Perhaps that is what your village  saw in you! Perhaps that's what Aro sees in you! A monster just like the rest of your coven!" (Y/N) looked taken aback by their own words, stunned. When they saw the look of growing rage upon Alec's face, they knew they had done it again. Like they had with your parents, they lashed out with hurtful words they didn't mean. Alec was very hurt. (Y/N) knew by the emotion overpowering his stoic gaze. "I'm so sorry." (Y/N) whispered, their anger rushing away as they began to feel nothing but guilt. The look Alec gave (Y/N) could kill but instead he began to walk by them. (Y/N) reached out for him, grabbing his hand. "Alec, wait-" They began but gasped as they immediately felt cold numbness crawl up their arm. Alec roughly tore their hand off him and they were so caught off guard that they didn't even notice the slight pain you felt within their fingers. Suddenly (Y/N) felt like they were on fire. 

(Y/N) screamed, collapsing to the ground, seeing Jane was now beside her brother. The two watched (Y/N) scream without sympathy. "So that's how you really feel." Jane said simply. Alice and Carlisle were quick to rush by the twins and towards (Y/N). "Enough! Not in my house!" Carlisle barked.  The pain stopped, only (Y/N)’s hysterical crying being heard. "I didn't mean it!" They cried out as Alice pulled them into a hug, hushing them. "It's okay." She told (Y/N). "You're okay."

It was obvious that all the Cullen's and the Volturi knew what had happened and surprisingly enough the Volturi also seemed rather angry by (Y/N)’s outburst. Alec had made it known, (Y/N) wasn’t worth his time. (Y/N)’s true feelings had finally come to light. Yet none of the Volturi seemed to believe them when they said it wasn't true. Despite knowing (Y/N) sometimes said things they didn't mean. The last time they had seen their parents being one of them. 

It had been Marcus that suggested the two covens separated for the night for some space. Especially since the Volturi hadn't fed yet. However, much to (Y/N)’s surprise, someone of the Volturi had phoned the Cullen's. Whoever it was, was asking on the leaders behalf how they were. If (Y/N) had to guess it was Marcus. If they were hopeful, Alec would want to know too. (Y/N) stared at Carlisle, who stood at the entrance way. "Marcus wants to know if you're okay." Carlisle said. "However I'm not entirely sure what to tell him. So, how are you (Y/N)?" (Y/N) slowly met his eyes. They looked exhausted from how upset they had been. "Tell him what he wants to hear. Tell him that I'm fine." Their voice croaked slightly. "I don't think I can do that." Carlisle said softly. "Why?" (Y/N) responded flatly. "You're asking me to lie for you." Carlisle replied. "He thinks I'm a monster. So it's better he thinks that way." Carlisle began to protest but Esme appeared with the phone. "Would you be willing to speak to him?" Carlisle asked, taking the phone from Esme. Even as Carlisle put it on speaker, Marcus asked if (Y/N) was alright. He even acknowledged that Jane's behaviour wasn't necessary. Somewhat of an apology. However (Y/N) stayed put, simply staring at the phone. After another few moments of silence, Carlisle took the phone off speaker before putting the phone to his ear. "My apologies, Marcus. I don't think they're feeling well enough to come to the phone right now. They appreciate your concern." "Of course, Carlisle." Marcus responded. "I thought it best to express my concern given Jane's gift." Marcus lifted his gaze to the twins, Jane looking indifferent whilst Alec's eyes were latched onto Marcus. "Emotions are high right now, would you appreciate our return tomorrow?" "Of course." Carlisle responded. "I'm going to keep (Y/N) here over night to keep an eye on them but I'm sure they will be just fine." After some more conversation, Marcus bid farewell and hung up the phone. 

He turned to Alec. "I assure you, they didn't mean it." "That doesn't matter." Caius snapped. "They still said it." Marcus turned his gaze to Caius. "You suffer from the same flaw Caius. If anyone should be understanding, it's you." "Why should I take the time to understand? They're human. That's a waste of energy." Marcus turned back to Alec. "Trust me. I'd know if there were any truth in their words." 

"They're coming back tomorrow?" (Y/N) whispered. Carlisle nodded. "We can take you home before they get here if you like. However, I feel more comfortable keeping an eye on you tonight after..." Carlisle trailed off but (Y/N) knew. After Jane used her ability on them. (Y/N) nodded. They were given the option to stick around the next day. Although (Y/N) declined, deciding they'd go home instead. 

"I'll drop you off." Alice said brightly in attempt to keep the mood light. "Thanks." (Y/N) said quietly. Alice, Carlisle and Esme went quiet. "Let's go out the front." Alice smiled. "I'll go and get my keys and meet you at the car okay?" (Y/N) nodded. "Sure." "Come and visit tomorrow." Esme nodded to them with a smile, bringing (Y/N) into a hug. "Okay." They responded quietly, offering her a small brief smile before heading out the door. 

Just as the door shut behind (Y/N), the Volturi moved into the living room after being let in by Jasper. Carlisle was quick to welcome them. Before they could ask, Carlisle explained whilst Alice passed by with her keys in hand. "Alice will be back shortly. She's taking (Y/N) home." 

Alice grinned at (Y/N) as she walked down the path. "Alright, ready to go?" Even now she was trying to keep the mood light. (Y/N) nodded. "Yeah. Thanks for the ride." "Of course!" Alice responded. (Y/N) kept their eyes on her, not daring to look at the house until they were in the car. 

Two days passed and Alec still wasn't speaking to )Y/N). Although (Y/N) figured it would have been best if they were the one to reach out to him given the situation as well as knowing Alec wasn't necessarily one to do any kind of approaching unless it were to kill them. (Y/N) found him alone and decided that was a better opportunity than any. He sat his his back to them, seemingly reading in Carlisle's study. "Alec?" (Y/N) asked quietly. They didn't receive a response, not even the turn of his head. He remained unmoving. "Could we talk for a minute? I want to apologise again. I didn't mean it but I still said it and I shouldn't have. It was an awful thing to say and I'm so sorry." Their words still didn't earn even the turn of Alec's head. "I can't stand not talking to you." (Y/N) began. "You're my best friend and I miss you. I want to make it up to you. To show you that I’m sorry and that I'd never think such a thing of you." (Y/N) still received no response. They sighed. "I don't know what to do here." "What makes you think you can do anything?" Alec's voice was cold. Although (Y/N) considered it progress. Especially as he turned around to look at (Y/N). His face was unforgiving, gaze piercing and his mouth in a tight line. "We both know I'm going to hurt you regardless." Suddenly he was standing and slowly moving towards them. (Y/N) took a step back. "You're scaring me." They said, trying to maintain the distance. He looked at (Y/N) like he did everyone else. He looked at them like he wanted them to burn as he did, like (Y/N) deserved more than he ever did. Alec looked like he most certainly would hurt them or even kill them. "I didn't mean it!" (Y/N) pleaded. "I'm sorry!" Alec glared at (Y/N). "It was my fault. It won't happen again." (Y/N) faltered. "What?" “It’s my fault for thinking you were different from any other disgusting wretched human!” Alec had most certainly returned the favour, his words cut (Y/N) to the core. They felt tears well up in their eyes. "Get out." Alec snarled and they did. Without question. 

Another day or so passed and (Y/N) had an idea of how to fix all of it. Once again, (Y/N) waited until he was alone, this time he was outside by the tree line before the woods. "I'm mad at myself too, you know." (Y/N) began, crossing your arms over your chest. "I felt the same way when I made my parents forget about me. The confusion and fear they had to see someone claim to be their child, have photographs with them but have no recollection of them ever existing. I was so angry with myself for saying what I did and I'm even more angry that I did it again but this time to you. I meant what I said Alec. You're my best friend. What I'm trying to say is that I get it, if you hate me. I understand. Although I really do want to try anything I can to make this up to you." His back was still towards (Y/N). "You won't even look at me." (Y/N) said quietly. Alec turned to look at them with an empty stare. "Alec..." (Y/N) trailed off. "I want you to forget this happened." "What?" Alec's eyes narrowed on them. "I want you to be happy. I never wanted to hurt you. So I want you to forget-" "No!" Alec covered his ears and shut his eyes tightly. "Alec, look at me." (Y/N) stepped closer. "No! Get back!" Alec yelled. That was when Carlisle hurried in between them both. "What is it?" Carlisle asked, looking between them both. "They're trying to make me forget!" "It's better this way!" (Y/N) pleaded to Carlisle. "I never meant for any of this and it's hurting him! I can fix it!" "(Y/N), I want you to listen to me very carefully." Carlisle began, blocking them from Alec. “These thoughts, these memories, they don’t belong to you. They are not yours to take." "I-" (Y/N) struggled to respond. Feeling both the eyes of Alec and Carlisle on them. Carlisle put his hands on their shoulders. "This isn't the way." "I can't believe you!" Alec spat. "This is how you want to make it up to me? Wipe my memory and pretend it never happened!?" (Y/N) could see the hatred in Alec's eyes. Any second chance he had considered was long gone. 

In that moment (Y/N) gave in. They knew they couldn't fix it. (Y/N) couldn't make it up to him and he wasn't willing to forget. It was over. Jane was the first to storm up to (Y/N) when they came back into the house. She was immediately held back and to their surprise she didn't use her gift.  However, she did rant that they were lucky she couldn't slap you at the very least. Although she didn't need to. (Y/N) was suffering enough. They didn't look at anyone, instead walking out the front door. Alec and Carlisle entered the house, Alec yelling in outrage. Carlisle simply wasn't listening to him. His eyes immediately searching for (Y/N). "They left...what happened?" Rosalie asked. Carlisle said nothing, rushing out the door after (Y/N). 

It was night time and most certainly not safe for them to walk home alone but they were determined to. Tears running down their cheeks, arms crossed over their chest as they briskly walked down the road. "(Y/N)!" They heard Carlisle call out behind them. (Y/N) didn't respond, continuing to walk away. Suddenly Carlisle was behind them, tugging them back. "(Y/N), it's not safe out here. Come back inside, we can figure-" "No!" (Y/N) shouted back. "Get off of me! I'm going home!" "Let me take you home then, come back to the car." Carlisle said. "I'm not going back in there! I’ve lost everything! It's my fault! I lost my friend, I lost my parents and there's no one else to blame but myself!" (Y/N) yelled. "(Y/N), you are a wonderful person with a remarkable gift. You just need some guidance. We can help you, just come back. I'll take you home!" Carlisle pleaded. "You know what the cruel part about my gift is Carlisle?" (Y/N) said significantly more quiet, an eerie calmness taking over them. "I can't use it on myself. I can make everyone around me forget anything but the one who wants to forget the most is me." (Y/N) took a step forward. "Can you take me home please?" Carlisle nodded. 

Outside (Y/N)’s house, Carlisle pulled over. "Come to the house tomorrow. We'll have something figured out by morning." (Y/N) sighed before nodding. "Alright, I'll do it." "This will improve, (Y/N). We'll talk things over with them." Carlisle assured them. "Yeah, just at what cost?" (Y/N) mumbled. "I lost my friend. Alec will never speak to me again." "You don't know that." Carlisle responded hurriedly. "I do." (Y/N) said. "I'm just going to sleep this off. I'll see you tomorrow." 

(Y/N) decided to run a bath later that night. Kneeling on the floor they turned on the tap which began to fill the tub. They felt the weight of every decision they had made on their body and no longer could they even cry about it. Whilst (Y/N) thought a bath would be best, they didn't really care about it being too warm or too cold. As a matter of fact, they didn't think further than the action itself. 

"They hurt me." Alec ground out. Marcus wanted Alec to see reason. Not only that, Marcus wanted Alec to admit the reality of the situation and not hide from it. It was of no surprise to him considering (Y/N) was the first proper friend Alec had, the closest anyone had ever come to the twins. "Just as you hurt them." Marcus replied. "You've hurt many people, Alec. (Y/N) is one of many on that list. Yet regardless, they want you in their life. They want your friendship. You want to punish them but you don't realise they've already punished themselves. More so than is necessary. Furthermore, you aren't just punishing (Y/N), you're punishing yourself. I know you want to be their friend but you won't let yourself." "They-" "You're torturing yourself as much as your torturing them." Marcus said simply. "I think they frightened you, boy. I think you forgave them the minute they said it and that frightened you." Alec didn't have a response. As much as he tried. He couldn't tell Marcus he was wrong because he wasn't. "I can't trust them." Alec responded. "You can. You simply won't. They said awful things but still want you in their life. Apologizing the minute it was said. You've never experienced that and it bothers you that it makes it difficult to act in your usual response." "I don't know how." Alec said after a moment of silence. "I don't know how to show that I care about them and I don't know how to show it when I forgive them. I'm so used to pushing people away that...I don't know how to let people in." "You tell them." Marcus responded. "Even if it means you need to say it to yourself first. Put down the weight of the past. Even if it's only for them." Silence filled the room. "I forgive them." Alec said under his breath, it was quiet, barely audible but there none the less. 

Alice tilted her head, staring at nothing in particular. “What is it Alice?” Jasper asked. “I think i should check on (Y/N).” She responded. “I can’t be sure but i think something is wrong.”  “They’re upset.” Carlisle responded. “Do you suspect they’re in danger?” Alice tilted her head again. “I don’t think so. It’s hard to tell, I see them and then it just goes black.”  “Why not give them a call?” Esme asked lightly. Alice nodded, immediately going for her phone. 

(Y/N)’s phone buzzed beside them, as they sat and watched the running tap. It was a text from Bella, telling them that Jake and the pack were around the area, making sure they knew the Volturi wouldn’t come within their vicinity for the night. (Y/N) was about to respond when they got a phone call from Alice.  “Hello?” (Y/N) answered.  “Hi (Y/N), I just wanted to check in with you since things didn’t end too well tonight.” They paused and Alice noticed. “They’re just leaving now for the night.” Alice said, locking eyes with Alec as the Volturi moved towards the door.  “I’ll be fine.” (Y/N) responded.  “I... thought i had a vision of you but, I couldn’t see anything.” (Y/N) smiled slightly with a hum of amusement. “You don’t need to look out for me, Alice. I’m just going to go for a bath and head to bed.”  “Are you sure?” Alice asked.  “Of course. Besides, I’ve already began running the water...as you know.” Alice hummed quietly in amusement. “This will be fixed tomorrow.” (Y/N) swallowed. “I know.” (Y/N) said quietly.  “It’s a good sign they want to see you, you know?” Alice said.  “I can only hope.” They said simply.  “Anyway, get some sleep and i’ll speak to you tomorrow, yeah?”  “Yeah, have a good night Alice.”  “See you tomorrow, (Y/N).” 

When (Y/N) hung up the phone, a tear ran down their cheek. ‘disgusting wretched human!’ Alec’s voice rang in their head. (Y/N) put their phone on the floor next to them. (Y/N) felt their clothes stick to them as they sank into the water, leaning back in the bath. The calm luke-warm water peaceful, like their mind. (Y/N) felt a tear run down their cheek. (Y/N) shook their head biting back their tears. Before any more could fall, (Y/N) slowly sank underneath the water. After a brief moment,(Y/N) sat up, their hair dripped as they felt another wave of calm wash over them. (Y/N) noticed a reflection of the ceiling along the water. An idea rushed to their mind and that was when they knew, what they had to do. (Y/N) hunched over slightly, arms moving to the edge of the tub, more droplets falling down the sides. They looked at their reflection.  “You’re going to forget. You’re going to forget the Volturi, forget what happened. You’ll forget ever meeting them. You’re going to forget that you have a gift to make people forget things. You won’t think to even question it. If it’s brought up. It’ll be like a dream, or story that you made up. You’ll forget ever using it, you wont remember to question why your parents aren't around.” It wasn’t known when (Y/N) had stopped repeating those very words. Although it wouldn’t concern them, they’d forgotten they had ever done it. "If only (Y/N) would have waited. If only we were quicker. Then maybe we would have had the time to tell them that they were forgiven. That for some of us, there was nothing to forgive. Maybe if we had spent more thought, we'd have known how much hurt they truly felt. However by then, it was too late what was done was done. They'd forgotten who we were, forgotten what they had done and all the details in between, washed away by their gift. We'd never know if such a gift could be reversed but could only hope that they've found peace and happiness. They'd live out their life, never knowing the happiness they gave and the joy they spread to many."  Marcus finished.

Many in the room couldn't help but glance at you, wanting to see your reaction. Perhaps a flicker of recognition would show. Your head lowered and the two covens seemed almost hopeful. You lifted your head, wiping your eyes. "That's sad. I hoped for a happy ending." A pang hit some of their chests, that statement had remained the same even before you had forgotten. A quiet hum escaped you. "You know it's strange, you said the humans name was (Y/N). My name is (Y/N) too." "Oh?" Marcus responded lightly with a ghost of a smile. You nodded. "It's a funny coincidence, I suppose." You looked at Marcus with uncertainty. "I feel like I should hug you...?" You began. Marcus cracked a small smile. "That's alright." Marcus stood up and you met him half way.  The room was quiet, even after you both separated. 

You moved into the kitchen to refill your glass of water when you jumped. Alec was so quiet you had no clue he was even in there. "You scared me!" You laughed, a hand going to your chest. "Sorry." Alec felt a pang in his chest, remembering how tried to apologise to him and he completely rejected you. This time you were apologizing for nothing. In your eyes, you had apologised to a complete stranger and that broke Alec's heart. He wished he could turn back time, assure you that you were forgiven, that you'd always be his friend. He missed that chance, you got so good at your own gift you figured out a way to use it on yourself. "Alec, yeah?" You asked. Alec nodded. "I'm getting better at names." You smirked, pleased with yourself. "The human in Marcus' story was your friend right?" You asked nonchalantly as you filled your glass. "Yes." Alec responded. "Can I ask you something?" You turned, now with a full glass with a small smile on your face. Alec knew that smile well that you had sent him. It was the polite smile you wore to anyone you didn't know. In the hopes that it would cover up how nervous you actually are about meeting new people. "Yes." Alec said again, not entirely ready for the question but whatever it was, it meant you'd stay in the conversation. For all he knew, that last conversation he'd have with you. "Were they nice? Your friend?" You might as well have stabbed him in the chest in that moment. Alec did his best to hide it. "They were wonderful. The best friend I could have ever had." Alec responded. You slowly nodded, contemplating his answer. "That's nice. Anyway, I won't bother you anymore." You smiled, raising your glass. "See you around." You turned and walked out the room without even a second glance. Leaving Alec standing in the kitchen, alone once again. Jane moved passed (Y/N), casting them a quick look before entering the kitchen towards her brother. She said nothing as Alec looked at her. For what could she honestly say? "They forgot me." Alec said quietly.

[royalequeenofships]

HSMTMTS Season 3 Predictions and Character Analysis

Ricky & Nini:

Ricky and Nini have a complicated relationship. I feel like they have the whole dynamic of “right person, wrong timing” vibe. They have chemistry and a bond with each other. However, for them to grow as a couple, they really need to have character development first. Nini really needs to figure herself out and who she truly wants to be and figure out her dreams and how she wants to pursue them. We had the whole YAC arc in season 2, where she goes there because she thought it was something that she wanted, but she realized that YAC was not truly what she wanted and isn’t what makes her happy. So, she’s slowly trying to figure herself out with independence and not relying on anyone except herself. In Season 1, most of her moments were with Ricky, with only the YAC arc really showcasing her independence, but her reliance on others in season 1 and parts of season 2. For example, Kourtney was the one who submitted her application to YAC, and partially her reasons for coming back to East High were also her relationship with her friends and Miss Jenn. Also, the fact that Carlos posted her song online, and she asked Ashlyn for help to write “Ain’t see nothing.” However, in episode 11 and 12, really starts showcasing her independence and stop relying on others for her journey. She BECOMES the one other people rely on, she hypes everyone up for their performances and is really figuring herself out and blossoming like the Rose. It is a great metaphor for Nini’s journey, and the fact that she herself calls Jamie’s brother instead of other people doing it for her, really makes it more special. Gina could’ve easily called her brother and be like “Oh yeah I have this friend who’s a great songwriter, yadda yadda.” But she does it herself, which is really great. Now with Ricky. Many people would agree with the fact that he truly does need therapy. He needs to learn how to handle change, and dare I say, realizing that other people are more important in his life. Personally, I felt like Ricky was very selfish this season. Last season, he was being selfish as he broke up with Nini because he couldn’t say I love you, and once school started again, he wanted Nini back so badly, but he proved himself worthy at the final episode when he stops being Troy to give Nini a chance to perform for YAC. However, this season once he and Nini are back together again, he was being selfish and thinking of himself again. When Nini goes to YAC, all he could really think about was how HER leaving was affecting him and his relationship with her.

For example, he would ask Gina for help on HIS own relationship, and sending Nini the message of how much he missed her and wishes she would be there because HE misses her so much. And thinking that Nini came home for him and him only. Plus, he thinks that the rose song that she wrote was SPECIFICALLY related to him, and then the whole situation with Miss Jenn and his dad, in which he was only thinking about himself and his feelings, with no regards to theirs. However, in episode 10, he finally stops being selfish and really opened his eyes to his surroundings, as he helped Carlos with his song for Seb. I hope this development continues, and once he realizes that he needs to stop being selfish, and is able to handle change and mature as a person, then maybe the Rini ship can happen once again. Another thing I’ve noticed about their “angst” in season 2 was the long-distance relationship, especially in episode 3. Although, Ricky and Nini were in the same city, throughout the episode, it still felt like they were going long-distance, which was probably foreshadowing their breakup. They only communicated through their phones that episode, and even at the end, their songs for each other wasn’t sang in person, but through the phone. As for predictions on the Rini relationship, I think that if Tim only plans on 3 seasons, then Rini will probably get back together at the end of Season 3, but if he has 4 seasons planned (which I am hoping for), then Rini will probably get back together then. Now we also have to take into consideration the career of Olivia Rodrigo. We do not know if she wants to continue with HSM, and even she herself is not sure. What I think will happen is, if Olivia decides she wants to take her music career to the next level, I think a really easy way to write her out without breaking the contract, would be to have her travel to L.A. to work on her music for the summer, so that there will be reason as to why she is absent for most of the season. This will probably take 1 episode to do and Olivia can spend the rest of her time focusing on her music. However, if Olivia decides she still wants to work full time in this season, then she might stay in Salt Lake and do the musical and write some songs for Jamie, etc but personally I think Olivia would want to focus on her music more than the show, as she posts about it more on social media than the show, and even with interviews. Nini might return for the final episode when summer ends and the new school year starts, so Olivia might just be in like 2 episodes. That’s my take on Rini for now, we get back to Ricky later.

E.J. & Gina:

Portwell is literally my favourite ship of the series, and it is just amazing. I personally would not like to see any angst in their relationship next season, but honestly it is probably going to happen and here’s why. Their relationship was built really steadily and took a long time to flourish. With other couples, like Seblos, Redlyn and Kowie, they got together awfully fast, taking 2-3 episodes to truly get together. So, the angst that those couples go through gets resolved rather quickly. Seblos with their relationship gets solved within 1-2 episodes, for the whole “does he like me because im the only gay one” storyline. Redlyn has the whole “Antoine” situation (which I will get back to later) and the “Red’s future” which again, took 1 episode to resolve. And Kourtney and Howie took 1-2 episodes to resolve the whole “Howie is from North high” and “Why Howie seems weird”. The reason is because those couples got together really quickly, and therefore their angst can be easily resolved through that, and wouldn’t really take time to fix. As you can see, Rini took a while to really get together. They were childhood friends off screen and we get to see their past relationship through flashbacks in season 1, but technically they took around 10 episodes to fully get back together. They have their cute., fluffy episodes for the first 4-5 episodes of season 2, but then their angst slowly starts to build at episode 5-6. It drags on until episode 8 where they fully break up, and counting episode 9 with their take on how they’re handling the breakup, so that’s around 5 episodes worth of angst for the couple that took 10 episodes to get together. So, with Portwell, they’ve technically been building them up at the end of season 1, but we’ll truly count the buildup starting from the Quincenero episode, which is episode 5, and they had 7 episodes worth of relationship buildup. So, I think, for the first 4 episodes, we’ll see some fluff and cute moments between the two when summer starts (and hopefully some kisses cuz like please I need to see at least one), but the angst will probably start in the middle of the season. It might take like around 4-5 episodes to fix, but I truly believe that they will not break up, and it will get resolved either near the final episode or the final episode of the season. Now for the REASON of their angst. I truly think the only “angst” worthy storyline is about EJ going off the college. As I can’t think of anything else that can topple their relationship. Firstly, EJ knows about the chocolates, which makes me think that he probably knows about Gina’s past crush on Ricky. Secondly, they resolved the whole “Big Brother” situation, and EJ knows that Gina doesn’t see her in that way. And the character development of E.J. and Gina. Back in season 1, they were arrogant and straight up ambitious people, who really don’t care about how others feel, but they truly changed as people in season 1 and 2, and had their character development moments. The contrast with them and Rini is that Season 1 focused on rini’s relationship development and season 2 and maybe 3 will really focused on their CHARACTER development. For Portwell, I think that would be flipped as they already had their Character development in season 1 and 2, so we probably will see their RELATIONSHIP development in season 3. So, since they already had their character development, I think it would be pointless to have unnecessary drama about their personalities or jealousy or whatnot, since they truly developed as people. So, the only thing I can possibly think of for their angst is EJ college arc. I know that they will probably fix it, but still I’m dreading to see it as I don’t want Portwell angst anymore. ☹ (ALSO PLEASE GIVE ME A PORTWELL DUET!! I NEED IT! Also, an EJ solo)

Ricky & Gina:

Personally, I do not ship Rina. I don’t think they would make a good couple; however, I think they would be really good friends. Someone they could confide in about their issues like Gina said “Sometimes I tell you things I don’t tell anyone else” and Ricky being like “I think we do that for each other.” We didn’t really get to see Ricky and Gina resolve their issues in season 2, partly because of Ricky’s character development. I am hoping to see in season 3, Ricky working on himself and fixing up his friendship with Gina. I think something that might happen is when Gina is going through her angst with EJ, and Ricky going through his own angst with Lily, they might be able to give each other advice and on how to handle it. However, PLEASE for the love of God, do not drag the whole love triangle back, because we do not need it. Gina has truly gotten over Ricky, and Ricky never seeing Gina as someone for his romantic relationship anyways, and he really needs to work on himself more, they should not be together as a couple. However, I do hope that they amend their friendship and is able to confide in each other once more, which I think will be cool and really help with Ricky’s character development.

Ricky & Lily:

Now this one. We know they will not be endgame, and I am 90% sure of the fact that Lily does not have romantic feelings for Ricky. Sure, she might find him attractive (and I mean who can blame her, Joshua Bassett is gorgeous), but she definitely does not like him in that way. We can see it when she “confesses” to him, she said to him “I like your brown hair and brown eyes” which are all physical descriptions of him, nothing about his personality which makes sense because she barely knows him, so how could she develop feelings for someone she doesn’t know. She has also stolen the harness, so we know that there would be no way that she likes him, and at the end of season 2, we don’t even get to see her feeling guilty about doing it, because she likes him. So that definitely setting in stone on how she’s only using him and manipulating him. Now for Ricky, yes you might be thinking “oh he’s calling her, why?” But Ricky does not know what we know. He was not there when Lily was talking to Gina about their roles as Belle, he was not there when Lily was laughing at Big Red, he was not there when she had a conversation with Miss Jenn, and he was not there when she planned with Antoine and when she stole the harness. In Ricky’s eyes, the reason that she was so mean to them is because of the Menkies, and their schools were enemies and rivals for it. He doesn’t know about Lily’s evil and ambitious side, and he believes that the Menkies might have made her that way. For example, he knows that the Menkies has turned Miss Jenn into someone different and a little bit mean, so he assumed the same for Lily, and when she asked for a second chance, Ricky gave it to her as he didn’t know. I feel like for the first couple of episodes, it will show Lily and Ricky “bonding” or getting to know each other, but Lily lying about the whole situation and really planning something behind his back, but we don’t know what yet. Maybe Ricky will be like “Huh, she’s a cool person, I’m starting to like her.” But then figuring out her plan, and finding out that she stole the harness. He then will be very upset and kind of heartbroken as he gave her a chance and she was only manipulating him the whole time. Maybe then, his character development will continue to grow and he will realize that he does not need to be in a relationship right now, and that he needs to work on himself and mature as a person. And I think him and Lily’s “relationship” will be a strong pushing point that he needs.

Seb & Carlos:

Now Seblos is one of my favourite ships in the show, and I love them to bits and pieces. However, as regarding their relationship, I feel like they have already resolved all their angst in season 2, it will be hard to make up angst for them in season 3, if they ever have one. I would like to say this though, I knew there was going to be angst for them in season 2, but the way they built it up, I thought the angst would be about how Carlos’ family is really rich, and Seb can’t compare because he lives on a farm, and it might make him self-conscious. Cause that’s where it seemed to be leading in the first few episodes of Season 2 (the sled, cashmere etc.). However, they brought a completely different angst to them which I thought was pretty surprising. Personally, I think they should’ve done the “class/money” difference in season 2, and then maybe the whole “why are you with me” angst for season 3, but maybe they MIGHT switch it around for season 3, and have the whole “class/money” difference then. Although, that’s probably the only “issue” I see for them ever, cause they’re a power couple and like what other angst could there be? Maybe they’ll introduce a new love interest but I highly doubt it because they already resolved the “I choose you always” in season 2. So, hoping there’s no Seblos angst, but if they do decide to throw in one, that might be the one they’ll do.

Big Red & Ashlyn:

Again, Redlyn is one of my favourite ships and they’re just so amazing. However, their storyline is hopefully again, all fluff for season 3, but one thing I realised that they didn’t really resolve in season 2 was the whole “Antoine” storyline. After episode 7, they never really talked about it again and introduced the new angst next episode with the whole “Career” thing. I feel like Antoine will be a more recurring character in season 3, as he only got like what? 10 minutes worth of screentime this season? (Maybe even less) and especially at the end as he joined Natalie in the final scene. So maybe there will be more of him in the next season, and slowly moving in on Ashlyn and making Big Red feeling like he’s not good enough, and then maybe Redlyn will FINALLY get their “I love you” confession then, because WE NEED IT! I’m manifesting for Redlyn “I love you” next season, and I think the whole situation with Antoine would be a nice way for Ashlyn to TRULY confirm to Big Red how much she loves him and how grateful she is for him, and vice versa. (Also manifesting for more EJ and Big Red friendship moments, like maybe Big Red goes for EJ for advice for his relationship with Ashlyn, and maybe EJ confiding in Big Red for Gina as well)

Kourtney & Howie:

As for Kourtney and Howie, they’re probably still going to work at the pizza shop together and continue to bond. A plot point that I think will be very interesting is maybe Kourtney trying to convince Howie to move to East High, but Howie kind of not wanting to, because he spent like 3 years there and it’s kind of his home. That might be a nice storyline to do, or it can be the opposite, where Howie is trying to transfer to North High, but Kourtney being worried like “Is he going to North High for me? I don’t want that, what if he hates it here”, but Howie confirming that he’s going to North High because the environment for him is better there and less competitive and toxic than North High. That might be a storyline that can happen for these two. I would also like for them to have a duet as well; I think Dara’s strong voice goes well with Roman’s soft voice and it would mesh well together.

Miss Jenn & Mr. Mazarra:

Now this one is a toughie, but I have some theories. Now we know that Ricky has given Miss Jenn permission to date his dad, which is another great character development for him, as he’s handling change and seeing other people’s happiness. However, as soon as he gave her permission, Mr. Mazarra confesses his feelings for Miss Jenn, which seemingly makes her happy, as we did get to see a little smile on her face when he did. Throughout Season 2, Benjamin was really the one comforting her, and giving her courage for the Menkies. We see it through episode 8, when he helped Miss Jenn film the commercial and how he put so much effort into making her coffee and setting up a table, just so she could relax. Same goes for episode 10, when she confides in him, and he acting like a therapist to her and accepting her anxious feelings, and helping her feel calmer and better. They are both opening up to each other. And I believe Miss Jenn truly appreciates him as a colleague and a friend. Now another moment is when Ricky’s dad comes to the show with flowers, and she was talking with Mr. Mazarra at the moment. When he called out her name, she smiles awkwardly and immediate turns to Mr. Mazarra saying something along the lines up “Why we always running into him?” and very awkwardly makes his way to him and you could tell she was slightly uncomfortable, with her awkward smiles and everything. This really contrasts from episode 3, where she herself walks up to Ricky’s dad and starts up a conversation, and how now, it is the other way around. Now, the whole problem of Mr. Mazarra leaving for Caltech. He confesses his romantic feelings to Miss Jenn, and really emphasizes on how she’s the only one who is stopping him from running off the California, which I believe that she is a big part of why, but also not fully. We really get to see Mr. Mazarra bonding with a lot of the students this season as well, E.J., Ricky, etc. I feel like he truly cares for his students, and in season 3, maybe he is thinking about if he really wants to stay in Utah for his students and of course, his budding relationship with Miss Jenn. Now, there was a scene in episode 4, where he was confiding to EJ about his rejection from Caltech. And he admits to EJ how he doesn’t think about Caltech very much anymore. He’s made his peace with it. This kind of mirrors EJ’s situation about Duke. EJ didn’t get into Duke from his own accord, but rather his dad got him in. Same can be said for Mr. Mazarra, EJ’s dad made the call for him for Caltech, and he didn’t really get in from his own as well, as he said previously, He was rejected many, many times. So maybe next season will really show him and his decision of staying at East High back in the fall, or leaving for Caltech. Now moving back to Miss Jenn. Next season, I feel like will focus on her and the students more, as this season, she was a really crappy teacher, and kept pushing them due to stress and wanting them to beat her ex at the Menkies. This season, I believe that she will return to the teacher that she was in season 1, and really focusing and hyping up the kids’ talents. I would love to see that Miss Jenn come back, and really help her students. Of course, the whole love triangle debacle will probably be fixed, I can maybe see Miss Jenn going out on a date with Ricky’s dad but thinking of Mr. Mazarra the whole time, and Ricky’s dad is a good man, so he might notice something is different about her, and tells her to go for it, her relationship with Mr. Mazarra before he moves or something. Also, since in season 2, we got to see Mr. Mazarra comfort Miss Jenn a lot, maybe this season will have Miss Jenn comforting Mr. Mazarra about Caltech, and if he truly wants to leave his students. Another thing I’d like to maybe see is Mr. Mazarra singing a song for Miss Jenn. We know that Mark St. Cyr has a good voice, as we saw from the Christmas special. So, him singing to Miss Jenn even though he doesn’t like musicals that much and all that, would show a lot of character development from Season 1.

Overall Plot:

Now, I have a few theories about summer. I’ve seen a lot of people saying they will go to a camp like “Camp Rock” which I think will be very likely to happen, and they put up a musical. What I can also see happening, is like High School Musical 2, where they go to a resort for work, and then putting up a musical there for the audience as well. Or they could just stay in Utah, and just relax for the summer, and not have any musical but just a lot of original songs about their summer in general and the stuff they’re going through. If they do a musical, I don’t think that they’ll do a musical from a movie or theatre, but rather write their own musical. I think it would be a really interesting concept, it can show us more imaginative and creative concept for a musical and have more original songs for the season. I would truly love to see that.

So that’s all for the character analysis and predictions I have for Season 3, sorry if it’s long lol

[fleetingpieces]

My One in a Million Chapter 8

Hiiiii! I'm back from the dead and finally got back to writing again <3

Sorry it took ages—and sorry it's not a great chapter— but thank you so much everyone for the patience and support, it means so much!

Thank you @inloveoknutzy @donttouchmycarrots and @knittingdreams for beating, love y'all! <3

Tag list: @whataboutmyfries @justdyingontheinside @heyoitslysso @sunflowerfox87 @hereforwolfstarr @potterlocked24-7 @ttylfedora @domesticatedbeetlenamedjorge @lovemeleo @im-lana

CW: Mentions of food

Ao3

Masterlist

Chapter 8 - The morning after

Remus woke up the next morning with a splitting headache. He blinked a few times to get the tiredness out of his eyes—which seemed to want to stay glued shut—and stared at the ceiling for long moments.

His first thought was that, for a second, he thought he could hear Padfoot’s laugh. Vague images of a dream he’d had came flooding back to him; long corridors, empty beds and his gaming console. The sound must have been a remnant of that.

The second thought was that the ceiling of his room was weird. He couldn’t quite pinpoint where the bugging sensation came from, but something was off and he was way too tired to figure out what it was. Maybe he should just go back to sleep. Groaning, he turned around to do just that, and that’s when he got a good look at the rest of the room.

He sat up with a start, regretting it instantly when nausea hit him like a wave. Closing his eyes, he stayed still until the feeling ebbed away, then opened them again slowly.

This wasn’t his room. There was no sign of any of his stuff; instead, he saw a big mirror, a dark wood chest of drawers, and a trail of scattered things that either belonged to different people or to someone with diverse tastes: a blue hair tie, a black snapback, t-shirts that at a glance he could tell were of different sizes, with stamps that varied from Disney to Strand.

One by one, memories from the night before popped up as the fogginess from sleep left him completely. That’s right, Sirius had offered his home to him after he’d found Remus outside of his flat; he’d come in to take a shower and had sat on the couch as they watched a movie and drank. Things were a bit hazy from that point on.

Had he really pouted and asked Sirius to stay with him like a little kid? Fuck, please let that be a part of the drunk hallucinations. He turned around slowly, glancing to the other side of the bed with his heart beating fast in his throat, but the spot next to him was empty.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Remus threw the blankets to the side and planted his feet on the floor to get some resemblance of stability, but frowned when he stepped on something. Looking down, he noticed a pillow and a blanket lying rumpled on the floor, next to his side of the bed.

A pang of guilt made its way to his chest when he realised Sirius must have slept on the floor while Remus was on the bed, covered from head to toe and warm. Sirius had been so careful with him. Every touch had been gentle, not invasive but rather trying not to overstep, trying to comfort. So, so very careful.

Remus felt slightly ashamed for thinking Sirius would take advantage of him. Not to mention for the way he'd bawled his eyes out in front of the man. He’d made a fool of himself yet again, something that kept happening a lot as of late and to which he wasn’t used to.

“Oh, God.” He remembered how he’d felt his mother’s hand brushing his hair before he fell asleep and he desperately hoped he hadn’t called out for her in his dream. Bringing a hand to his forehead, he could almost feel that phantom touch, tracing fingertips over his hairline.

He rubbed his face in embarrassment. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to face Sirius after all that, but there was no way he could fall asleep again and a quick glance at the clock on the opposite wall told him it was barely eight in the morning. It was still too early to call Leo or go back to the clinic, plus he didn’t know how everything had panned out.

Remus glanced at the bedside table where his phone was lying face down and stretched over to grab it. He flipped it from hand to hand, back and forth, the small thing weighing him down every time it fell on his palm with a soft thud.

He could call.

He should call.

But what if something had gone wrong? What if Cocoa had had a complication during the night? Would they have notified him already if that was the case? Did he want to find out like this, far away from him and helpless to do anything? He didn’t want to show any more weaknesses in front of Sirius, he’d already shown more of his vulnerable side than he’d ever intended to.

Nodding to himself, Remus got up and threw the phone on the bed. He took two steps towards the door. The doctor had told him to go in the afternoon; he could wait a couple of hours before going back to the clinic and then he would know and—

A huff escaped him as Remus hurried back and dialed the number, plopping down on the mattress.

“Thank you for calling Mercy Animal Clinic. This is Jennifer, how can I help you?”

“Yes, hi, my name is Remus? I brought my dog in last night for chocolate poisoning and I—I was just calling to check on him?”

“Of course, Sir. What is the patient's name?”

“Cocoa,” said Remus, gripping his phone a bit tighter. Jennifer hummed and asked for a few more details to confirm his identity, to which Remus replied on autopilot, his mind going blank in a subconscious attempt to protect himself.

“Just a second, please.”

Remus busied himself counting the floorboards while he waited, trying to calm his nerves, but it had the opposite effect as he became very aware of how long Jennifer was taking to find what he wanted to know. He’d started tapping his foot when the receptionist finally came back on the other end of the line.

“Yes, everything was ok during the night and Cocoa will be ready to go home after lunch,” they said cheerfully.

Remus’ breath stopped completely and then he exhaled loudly. He could have sworn he felt his heart unclench, invisible fingers letting go of their painful grip and allowing blood to stream freely again. His shoulders dropped, releasing all the pent up tension that had been building there since he’d stepped into his apartment the night before, and he laid down, covering his eyes with his free arm.

“Sir?” Jennifer said hesitantly.

“Yes. Ok. Ok. Thanks, I’ll be there.” He hung up and let the phone fall at his side.

The silence of the room was an echo of his own head as Remus tried to let the words sink in. He peeked at the ceiling from under his arm. Cocoa was fine. The phrase repeated itself a few times until Remus took a deep breath and swung himself up.

The hall was quiet outside of the room, but he could hear some noises coming from ahead. Remus bunched the sleeves of the jumper he was wearing, not too willing to admit how comfy and warm he was in Sirius’ clothes. Especially not when he was assaulted by memories of Sirius helping him walk through this same corridor the night before and Remus almost gave in to the embarrassment. Sirius probably thought he was pathetic.

Groaning, he steeled himself as he padded the rest of the way, but his step faltered before going into the kitchen, a hand rising to settle on the wall. Something smelled amazing in there. Like melted butter and Saturday mornings back home, with his mom humming as she stood by the stove and the sun streamed in through the open windows. The sound of the sizzling pan was accompanied by a rock song playing in the background, a cool guitar distortion filling the room, followed by a gravelly voice singing a capella.

And there was Sirius in the middle of it all, moving around the kitchen gracefully, head bopping and singing into a ladle. He slid across the floor like Tom Cruise in that old movie as he moved to the fridge and a chuckle bubbled out of Remus’ chest, taking with it most of the heaviness still clinging to him.

Sirius jumped up, accidentally closing the fridge door with a bang, and turned to face Remus fully. It was only then that Remus realized what he was wearing: he had black ripped jeans and a black tee, his hair was pulled back in a loose ponytail; and on top of all that, he had one of those aprons that had a buff man printed on the front, that read “Kiss the chef”.

Remus stared for so long that Sirius followed his gaze and looked down, only to look back up quickly with a blush. “It was James’ idea of a joke.”

James, as Remus was quickly learning, took special pleasure in teasing his friends, although Lily claimed he always failed when it came to her. But Sirius clearly treasured anything that came from his best friend, no matter how silly or awkward.

Clearing his throat, Remus stepped into the kitchen and peered at the stove. “What are you making?”

“Pancakes!” Sirius exclaimed, seemingly glad for the rapid move of the subject. “I thought you could use some hangover breakfast,” he added with a shrug before turning back to the mixing bowl on the counter.

“Oh,” Remus said dumbly, taken by surprise. He scrambled for something to add. “Did you get the recipe from the same place as those cookies?”

Sirius spluttered and threw an offended look over his shoulder. “Mon Dieu, I’m never going to live that down, am I? I’ll have you know, these are my speciality. But I won’t give you anything if you keep that attitude up.”

Laughing quietly, Remus breathed a sigh of relief that Sirius wasn't looking at him with pity or mentioning his sorry state from the night before. So much had happened between them in just one day, he wasn’t sure how he was supposed to act anymore. He shuffled awkwardly to the island and, as he leaned on it, the name of the song Sirius had been dancing to dawned on him.

“I can’t believe you’re actually listening to Black Dog,” Remus said, covering his face, not sure if he wanted to laugh or cry.

“Hey,” Sirius turned to point at him with the batter-covered ladle, “Plant speaks to me on a spiritual level. I’m sending good vibes to Cocoa.”

Remus raised an eyebrow, making an effort to keep the corners of his mouth down. “You do know that the lyrics have nothing to do with dogs, right?”

“Yeah, but it’s the feeling that counts,” he waved his hand dismissively, sending a few vanilla-colored drops flying, “and the song title.” Smiling at that logic, Remus shook his head—as weird as it was, he found it reassuring. Sirius peered at him as he flipped the golden pancakes easily. “I’m glad you look better. How are you feeling?”

Remus tensed up, but it didn’t look like Sirius was making fun of him. Focusing on some point by his feet, he rubbed at his neck. "Yeah, um. Thank you for your help. And sorry about...everything. I guess it was one thing after the other and it was just too much.”

“We’ve been through this, you have nothing to be sorry for,” Sirius smiled tentatively. “Have they contacted you from the vets?”

“Actually, I called just now.” His heart rate picked up as excitement coursed through his body. Saying the words aloud made them even more real, allowed them to settle in and gave way to tiny pinpricks of impatience. “They said everything’s good. I can bring him home after lunch.”

Sirius turned to face him fully and his hand went to grip Remus’ forearm, his smile turning so bright it was almost blinding. “Remus, that’s great.”

Remus smiled too, staring straight at him. “Yeah,” he breathed. After a second too long, he coughed discreetly and moved back. “I just feel like I won’t be able to relax fully until I see him, you know? I wish I could go over now.”

“Yeah, I get that,” Sirius said as he leaned back too, fingers moving to play with the strings of his apron. “Just a few more hours, eh?” Remus hummed noncommittally and, sensing that he needed a bit of a distraction, Sirius turned his attention back to the food. “In the meantime, can you get the plates from over there?” He pointed at a cabinet as he got the pan out of the stove.

Remus did as he was asked and brought them over to the counter, where an array of toppings were waiting. His stomach grumbled as he watched Sirius cutting up some strawberries to place over the pancakes and then drizzling chocolate on top of everything, singing under his breath to the next song on his playlist. It was all oddly domestic. It was nice.

They sat in the living room to eat, though instead of sharing the couch like they had last night, Sirius—now without the ridiculous apron—sat across the coffee table on one of the armrests. Remus took a bite of the fluffy sponge and closed his eyes with a hum. “Ok, you were right. These are awesome.”

Sirius had just taken a mouthful himself, but he beamed before he swallowed and licked some of the chocolate off his finger. “Glad you like them, Re. I don’t think my reputation could have survived another fiasco.”

“Are you sure this wasn’t just a lucky mistake?” Remus joked, if only to ignore the way his stomach jumped at the nickname, prompting Sirius to throw a napkin at him.

For the next two hours or so, the conversation was light and easy while the music kept playing at a dim level. But, as time went on and the plates got piled up on the coffee table, Sirius started getting distracted.

He kept glancing at his phone like he was checking the time or waiting for a call. Remus would have thought that he was overstaying his welcome—Sirius had a life to get back to, after all—if it weren’t for the fact that the man kept the conversation going and going, asking questions and gesturing excitedly when he was telling a story about how he and his friends had once managed to get a flock of pigeons inside a train full of passengers. At this point, Remus was pretty sure that Sirius was not capable of lying.

A lazy breeze drifted in from the open window, bringing in the smell of morning dew and ruffling Sirius’ hair so that a few strands fell in front of his face. As he brushed them back, he raised his eyes and pinned Remus with a look that was slowly becoming very familiar. That look that said he wanted to say something but he was choosing his words carefully.

Remus was pretty sure he knew what that meant. So far, everything he’d blabbed about the night before had been skillfully avoided—mostly by Remus averting his eyes every time Sirius looked at him like that. He wasn’t looking away now though. Wasn’t sure he could, honestly; not with such intensity and thinly-veiled concern directed his way. Sirius opened his mouth, the words starting to form at the back of his throat when Remus’ phone pinged.

He jumped slightly and went to quickly fish it out of his pocket, holding on to the getaway it provided. Talking about his behaviour or the few hints he’d let slip about his past was not something he was ready to tackle. A quiet sigh dropped from Sirius’ lips as he got up to take the plates back to the kitchen, while Remus stared at the notification flashing on his home page. “Oh, Padfoot just uploaded a new video?”

The sound of ceramic banging in the sink startled Remus into looking up. “Um...you ok?”

“Yes! Too much soap,” Sirius’ voice came back, muffled slightly by the running water.

Remus snorted and got comfortable on one end of the couch, resting his back on the side and pulling his knees up. He wiggled his toes as he waited for the page to load, digging them into the plush sofa and then tapping his feet when the video finally started. It began like usual, with the starting screen of a game and Padfoot’s cheerful voice.

“Hello everyone and welcome! You’ve all been nagging at me to play with Prongs more often, so I hope you appreciate how much effort it took to get his ass out of bed.”

“That’s so not the introduction I was expecting,” another voice complained.

“Oh, I’m sorry, did you want to do it?”

“Why, yes, thank you. Hello y’all! By popular demand and because I know you like me more than this silly goose, I am here to play some games and have fun! Mostly at Padfoot’s expense.”

“You’re the only person in the world who could say ‘silly goose’ and not have everyone laughing at them.”

“I know, it’s a skill I honed for years.”

“What the hell,” Remus laughed, shaking his head fondly.

Sirius came back into the room, drying his hands absentmindedly on his pants as he took his seat back. He sat at the very edge of the cushion, leaning slightly forward with his hands clasped between his knees, eyes down.

Remus made a questioning sound, waving the phone in front of him. “Do you mind?”

“No,” Sirius croaked, gesturing with his hand for him to go on as he cleared his throat.

A small line of confusion pulled Remus’ brows together. Something was definitely going through Sirius’ mind. Deciding to give the man some time, Remus focused his attention back on the video and made a note to ask later if something was bothering him.

Padfoot was talking about the game they were going to play and Remus could feel his energy even through the screen. He always got like this when he was trying something new. Remus pictured him bouncing on his chair, waiting impatiently to start playing, tapping the buttons in anticipation. “He’s like a kid on sugar, isn’t he?” he said without thinking.

A cough came from Sirius’ spot. “Well, I… I think it’s...nice? He sounds happy.”

The corners of Remus’ lips tugged up in a small smile at that. “Yeah. That’s good.”

“Huh?”

“He didn’t seem his usual self in the past few streams. I’m just glad he’s ok, is all.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Remus saw how Sirius’ hands gripped his knees tightly, slipping through the holes in his jeans. Remus watched in silence but, just when he was about to ask what was going on, the video changed. A small square appeared on one of the corners, showing a man sitting in a chair, not much to see in the background, his face covered with the black dog that was his signature logo. Remus sat up straighter. It wasn’t often that Padfoot appeared in his videos and he couldn’t help the interest that sparked inside him whenever it happened. He scanned the small image until something caught his eye.

“Huh? ...Wait. That’s—” Remus froze for a second before promptly throwing his phone to the other end of the couch. “Oh my God.” He covered his mouth, feeling the pull of his mouth as a grin lit up his face, his wide eyes not leaving the small device lying innocently face up. “Oh my God, oh my God.”

“What happened?”

Remus turned to see Sirius looking at him with a confused little smile, probably wondering if he was still drunk or just bonkers.

“He...he’s wearing my merch. My merch.” And one of his favourite hoodies from the collection, at that. “How—How does he even know about me? I know he likes to keep in shape but…”

The faintest blush crossed Sirius’ cheeks. He rubbed his hands together, looking down at them and then back up at Remus’ still astounded face. He took a deep breath and exhaled in one go. “You know, I’m...” He trailed off, mouth opening and closing a few times.

Remus tried to bring his thoughts back to the room, to the man in front of him and not the one on the screen. He bent forward to grab the discarded phone, his mind still reeling as he paused the video. “Yeah?” he prompted Sirius to go on when he straightened back up, smile still in place—he wasn’t sure he could wipe it off even if he wanted to.

Sirius’ grey eyes roamed his face, then went to the phone in his hands before they finally settled on his bright expression and he sighed, smiling and shaking his head. “No, nevermind.”

Remus tilted his head, but Sirius simply shrugged. “Are you sure? You can say it, whatever it is.”

“I don’t think it’s the right time,” Sirius admitted, letting his head fall back as he worried his lip.

Curiosity flared up, dazzling and hot, and Remus tried to water it down, unwilling to trespass Sirius’ boundaries. Instead, he looked down and tried to organise his whirring mind, eyes going to the clock on his phone. “Fuck,” he muttered. He really wanted to finish watching and keep talking with Sirius, but it was getting late. “I should probably get going.”

“Oh,” Sirius blinked as he raised his head up. “You can stay if you want to.”

“No, I…” Remus stood up. “I should go get the key from Leo. I will probably see both his mom and mine, which means it won’t be a short visit and I’d like to be at the clinic as soon as possible.”

“Do you want me to come with you?”

Stopping midstep, Remus turned to look at Sirius, eyebrows raised. “Come with me?”

“Yeah, to the clinic? You are not too fond of them.”

It wasn’t a question, but Remus replied anyway, surprised that Sirius had caught on to that at all. “No, I’m not,” he said, dumbfounded. He shook his head. “But it’s ok, you did a lot for me already.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “Remus, anyone in my place would have done the same.”

No, they wouldn’t.

“It’s fine, really. Leo will probably come with me,” he said. He wasn’t sure how Sirius could think that everyone was that selfless, that any person would have helped an almost stranger without thinking it was too much effort. Remus chose not to say anything about it, knowing fully well that was not the case.

[ilysmxiao]

your title is gone now, childe. | childe x reader

ok this is rlly shitty bc ive nvr written for childe before. the reason why i did was bc there was a yt vid (which the link is here) and a lot of ppl were writing ab it,, so i decided to join in on it and my friend rlly liked it lol. so im posting this here . this is super shitty tho, cus i rushed it. childe is probably occ so b warned. anyways i might start writing genshin fics, so yea. pls pls pls check the warnings bc this is triggering,, gn prns used !! i wrote this listening to i bet on losing dogs on repeat lmao summary : the love of your life remains as your enemy, even as you both grow closer and share memories you would never share with another person. although you truly loved him, he had what you didn’t. in our lives, we do what we can to achieve what we want, even if it ruins what we already had. we must pay the price if we sought to get what we wish. warnings : character death, gore/blood, knife stuff, possible manipulation?? jus overall sad shit. please dont read this if ur triggered by those things !! 

at first, it had felt like a game - a childish one, in which both had fought for the title they held so dear. a number was just so in many eyes, but in their own, it held much more meaning. to be a harbringer, you must prove your strength. to achieve such title, it wasn't considered dirty to cheat, as it all was just part of the game. as time went on, though, it all had lost it's meaning, though one continued to fight - whether that was to prove he earned his title, and did not want to lose the superiority that it granted him, or for other selfish reasonings that even his inner thoughts refused to accept. due to his own lack of true understanding of the powers others held to make himself seem all the greater, childe went into the war blindly; yet, at the same time, too aware, so much so that his concentration on his weak spots created a new one entirely that was left open. it was not paranoia that put him in this spot, but his own selfish reasons he had yet to entirely understand. a cough escaped the males lips, blood dripping down from the corner of his mouth. it was then, did he realize he underestimated his lovers strength, their willpower, and the lack of true love they held for them. even with a knife against their neck, they would not back down, and it was far too late to realize such. whether [y/n] truly loved him or not, whether they used him for the title that granted them so much power in liyue, he could not tell if what angered him was the lies he had been given or the very fact he so gradually fell straight into them. in the end, all that mattered was who won, but he was unsure if the battle he sought was one he truly wished for. although he was a merciless harbringer, one with no care for the likes of someone like [y/n], he still had a right to love. not only so, but at the end of the day, [y/n] promised him that if all else corroded around the two, they would always be there. childe refused to listen to the soft spoken echoes of the loving words [y/n] used to tell him. he refused to watch the sweet memories of the two playing with teucer, bringing back the toys [y/n] taught him how to make for the pure fact that the poor kid would not find out the truth - or when they would lay in bed together, speaking of the many stories they had experienced in their lifetimes that made them who they were now. but when all is said and done, what all of that was true? did any of it mean anything, if the ones people truly loved hurt them in a way that was unforgivable? when they took away the one thing that meant so much to them? when all is taken, what do they become; what happens then? "oh, oh, my little baby," his lovers lips cooed, their hand softly grazing the others chin. "what have you become?" a soldier that blindly ran into war, fighting against a force he could never put his finger on. the title of a harbringer was an important one, though, how important it was to another was never going to be the same as the other. childe lacked to realize such, stuck in a bubble of his own selfishness and his love for the other - he never cared to realize how much it might have meant to the other. he never sought to realize the power that being even related to one it gave them, or the trip that it would put them on. childes eyes gazed up at his lover, soon shooting away to the empty space beside them. upon looking into those blue eyes of his, one could see the color began to dull and the ambitions he once held began to fade. "i should have been more cautious of you, i would have never expected you to be the one to steal this from me." although he said it in a tone that could show the way he laughed at his own faults, [y/n] knew very well that he had officially been stripped of what power he had held. "you underestimate me, childe. did the acts of other teach you nothing? even the ones you love betray you, a war can not have two winners." a small, hoarse chuckle left his lips; a burning sensation growing in his abdomen. the blood continued to poor out of his side, in which, caught his attention - his eyes glanced at the wound at his side, then back at his lover. he knew his time was up, as the thoughts of his loved ones and the risks he had managed to pull through with scattered his mind - was it worth it, leaving his loved ones behind, his younger brother who had meant as much to him as he did to teucer, in the end? "i hope that..," [y/n] paused for a moment, a small sigh leaving their lips. "in the next life, we meet again, and that you are sure not to let your guard down." the gaze that casted upon childes body soon wavered, turning into almost a sad one, perhaps even a disappointed one - in that moment, when their gaze met each others, they both realized what this both costed them both. it was clear that [y/n] still loved him, and always have loved him, and that was the breaking point for the both of them. one refused to show it, the other was uncaring of what he had let the other see. what is left after life is what truly matters, and although you may not like how it ended, at least something stuck with you until the end. right? "i-i'd like to believe that, [y/n]," childe muttered shakily, his brows very slightly furrowing. "you truly can not trust those closest to you." although the males lover already knew what they had done, what it had costed them - the one person he had chosen to love, the last words to leave childes lips was what had made him fully understand what he had done and the pain was one he knew that he never truly would be able to get away from. "well, we will see, won't we?" there was a pause, silence soon flooding the air. childe knew his time was coming, he accepted it, and it nearly mortified him to know things had to end the way it was going to. "y-yeah, we will.," few words left childes lips, and another blade plunged into his stomach. another groan left his lips, his face coiling slightly in pain. if you were to look hard enough, you could almost see the tears that soon began to prick the males eyes. "i love you, ajax." soon, [y/n] wrapped their body against their dying lover, and childe attempted to do the same. "i-i.., love.. you, too." those were the final words that childe spoke, his body soon going limp in his lovers arms. the words he spoke still lingered, echoing in the bristling sounds of leaves swaying in the wind - nothing more, nothing less. to become a harbinger, there were no rules - you just had to prove you were worthy of such a title, no matter what it costed, no matter how you cheated the rest. life does not come with special privilege's, no one will let you surpass them willingly, you have to fool them into believing you cant, and only then will you be able to reach what you sought for.