#alt says stuff

[au-not-alternate]

every day it becomes more and more apparent to me that the thing that oppresses us most is the need to be labeled. we cannot exist without a label being forced upon us, and that is how we are divided

[800db-cloud]

spare some spy hcs? 👀

OKAY. ok. so i have been putting off answering this ask because i’m admittedly very shy and very afraid of sharing my headcanons. and also because i have A LOT OF THEM.. but here we are!

here are my headcanon spies :) René works for RED and Jacques works for BLU!

where to start, where to start… i have a LOT of headcanons for them, i’ll be talking for FOREVER here. i’ll just start with story because why not! xP

René’s parents were also agents/spies, so he was always destined to be one as well. And he lives up to his parents’ legacies! He’s most notorious for destroying gangs and mobs and the like from the outside in. He was brought to America years ago to take out a dangerous mob boss, but unfortunately found himself infatuated (and involved) with the boss’ daughter. Luckily for him, the boss’ daughter wanted the guy dead, too.

René’s story is honestly a lot more fleshed out than Jacques’, but here goes anyway:

Jacques’ father was a very rich and powerful man in politics. Jacques himself was the result of an affair, and to keep it hush-hush, his father decided to raise him. Raise is a strong word, though— but he did help his father gain intelligence and blackmail on opposing political parties. Jacques proved to be a promising spy since childhood.

If anyone has any suggestions/ideas for Jacques’ story, let me know haha x) he didn’t have the greatest upbringing per se…

last thing on this section i wanna talk about is the Scouts. René is related to both of the Scouts; he’s RED Scout (Jeremy)’s biological father, and he’s BLU Scout (James)’ adoptive/step-father. Jacques has no relation to either scout, but acts as a guardian figure to BLU Scout.

anyway, this is the part where i continue talking about other miscellaneous headcanons! and these come with doodles :)

You couldn’t catch René DEAD without his mask, or his suit! He’d neeever take them off around other people (‘other people’ is mainly just Scout. For obvious reasons.) Meanwhile, Jacques is pretty lenient in letting his teammates see his face! Everyone on BLU’s seen his face at least once.

A big part of why René refuses to strip down is also due to the fact he has a LOT of tattoos. No doodle for this one because I’ve yet to decide on what tattoos to put on him (ideas are very welcome!!), but yeah! Most of the tattoos were ‘forced’ onto him/he had to get for jobs and ‘fitting in’ with bad crowds, but a good few of them were of his own accord, too.

Jacques doesn’t have tattoos, but he has a myriad of another thing: scars! Lots and lots of scars on this guy. Faded and old, sure, but they’re there. Most prominent ones are the one around his neck (from when the RED Medic beheaded him) and the ones on his forearms (those are from the LAST time he was imprisoned— looong story…)

René doesn’t cook very often for his team, but when he does, everyone’s always BLOWN AWAY by this guy’s cooking! René’s really bad at taking compliments, though— (“Cooking food that’s remotely edible isn’t a compliment, it’s basic survival.”) —but rest assured he’ll be thinking about it for the next month. Jacques, however… Do NOT let this guy into the kitchen. Ever. The BLU base has a special fire extinguisher “In Case Spy Decides To Turn On The Stove”

oooh, this one is an hc and a HALF to me. René much prefers working alone. It’s just in his nature, being isolated and whatnot. He likes to deal with things by himself– maybe he doesn’t want to burden others? On the contrary, Jacques NEVER works alone. It’s a trait he’s had even before being hired to BLU. You never know when things could go wrong, so it’s best to have someone else to fall back to… or someone else you can blame!

these hcs both have something to do with how René and Jacques show their trust in other people :) it’s a bit convoluted but it gets there:

René is, amusingly, very bad at remembering names. Almost laughably bad. There have been many-a-story of his days before RED where he’d get a target’s name wrong, even after he’d repeated it in his head dozens of times over. Names are difficult for him, so if he remembers yours, it means you mean a lot to him! He prefers using his teammates’ names rather than their titles. René is unaware of how charming this specifc trait is to his coworkers (they saw how much work and effort it took for him to memorize their names, they’re just happy with how far he’s come!)

Jacques has a… to put simply, very complicated relationship with food. But the one thing he’ll never turn down is sweets. His favorites especially being chocolate bonbons. Jacques has a hard time eating in front of others, let alone sharing his food! But if he genuinely likes and trusts you enough, he’d have half the mind to share with you. Admittedly, he hasn’t brought himself to share with most of the members of his team yet, except for a select few. Mostly BLU Medic and BLU Sniper.

—

and of course, eventually, EVENTUALLY, these two also become friends! it took a little bit but believe me, they both respect each other’s skill in their job :)

AHHg i could go sooo much longer about them— from things like their physical traits (how much teeth they have? it’s a pressing question) or different periods of their life (why did rené have to leave his family? why was jacques imprisoned for the last time?) BUT this post is so… so, so long. My fingers hurt from typing

If you’ve managed to read through this Beast, THANK YOU RAAHH!!! thanks so much for asking this, too. i hope to spare more hcs someday. hehe ^_^

[justladders]

I feel like Errortrap could use a hug

he's okay just listening

[aalesu]

Don't mind me, making a compilation of Legoshi and Louis being fucking gay

btw why are gay people always trying to run away together?

I'll never forget the first time I read the "which of these three are you going to eat?"

+ Legoshi saying herbivores are beautiful while looking at his totally platonic bestie Louis. Like, man, you don't need to be gay to appreciate another's man beauty but this bitches are gay

RIGHT-- Almost forgot my man Louis also saying he loves carnivores while thinking of Legoshi

Also almost forgot a classic

how did I forget this scene???? this is the gayest shit ever like- GRABBING HIS TIE???? MFG AND LOOK AT HIS FACE! Louis knows what he's doing.

[buttered-toasty]

There is a red eye in the east.

.

.

Posting this one reallll early cause why not. It is one of my inktobers (just not labeled bc the writing takes away from the vibes). Fun fact: this shit is titled “mawwiage” in my files lol

[scribe-of-hael]

I feel like a deep cleaning of a car alt mode would feel like a deep tissue massage for the bot

Brushing away first, vacuuming the floor boards, the bubbly sounds of leather cleaner on their seats, on their dashboard.

So satisfying for the cleaner and relaxing for the bot ❤

[elizabethrobertajones]

heeey they graphically updated the ARR world leaders with custom models (well. Nanamo has one too but she seems the same to my eyes and she seems like a normal lala when not wearing her full costume?)...

Aside from Raubahn and Merlwyb somehow being even hotter I have to shout out Kan-E's unicorn necklace's radical improvement :D

(unicorn way up so you also never unsee it)

Aymeric, Lyse and Hien remained low poly at the Alliance meeting, as did poor HW-style Thancred, who just dramatically collapsed in order to travel the rift into graphical fidelity...

Also very funny that earlier Asahai showed up with the old graphics, but Maxima was already boasting full new skin textures despite having of course a way more custom model than the completely character creator ready Hyur next to him... This is the exact right time in the game's history to be in late Stormblood to enjoy the roll out.

[layaart]

metal from heaven is out now

[autistickaitovocaloid]

Yakuza picmix the sequel

[au-not-alternate]

the rarepair shipper has found an alternate spelling for its favorite ship! rejoice! it shall last through the winter now

[crystalpallette]

no witty caption today; I just love ringo hiii ringoooo

[peapodsinspace]

Drawing on magma with MY STUPID SISTER @scarymonsters-andsupercreeps <3

[Image ID in alt text]

[octoberarts]

[Image Description: A digital drawing of a woman with Pfeiffer Syndrome, standing with her legs crossed over, one arm across her waist and the other up in a confident position. She wears a colourful outfit, most prominently a yellow jacket with rainbow sleeves, but also an orange top, denim skirt and red shoes. Her hair is a mix of purple with pink streaks and is up in two buns. She has a blue hearing aid and tracheostomy tube. /End description.]

I meant to upload this last week for facial equality week...but hey, better late than never! I finally settled on purple for her hair, but I think she'd look good with any colour of hair. I had considered rainbow as well...well, I guess for pride month next month I should do a rainbow haired character!

Image ID in the post again, as I saw a post saying alt text isn't always accessible on screen readers?

[foxbirdy]

mahiahionomalolo 🌊 banner-in-progress for a display case of fish skulls at my university!

[vynnyal]

Turns out Sunlit Trail isn't quite done just yet, so after all that they just send you to a dead end 😂

[pokimoko]

Hello!! i just discovered your blog and firstly i wanna say that your art is gorgeous! <33 and secondly, if youre still taking requests could i get a lesbian/non binary cheetah? /nf

Thank you! Cheetahs be upon ye!