#also ya this took me like 20 minutes to write lmao

[apheliavampire]

Just a short little snippet of my Tav and Astarion, and his nightly eating habits.

"You can feed on me tonight" Grimodim said, staring almost coldly at the vampire. "Well then, I'll see your sweet self tonight~" Astarion replied with a purr. As he watched the half orc turn away however, he found his hands reaching out, stopping him from leaving for a moment. "Ah but, Grimodim? I do… Have a question."

Grimodim turned around, giving Astarion his full attention. "Then ask away."

"While it's not that I don't appreciate your ah, nightly donations… I have to wonder why you do it. Ah ha, look at me, caring about another. Is lust the reason you offer?" The pale elf's crimson eyes looked the half-orc up and down, almost as if he was mentally undressing him.

"It's duty."

"It's what?"

"I allow this to happen for a multitude of reasons, but one of them is duty. You fight better when you've had blood, it's easier than having to worry about you biting someone during combat, and it means you're not doing this to anyone else in camp."

"You make it sound like it's a bad thing, darling~"

Grimodim sighed. "I… Just, drop it, Astarion. You might not enjoy the truth."

"No, please~ It is lust isn't it? I always did peg you for a pervert, wanting to monopolize m--"

"It is extremely painful, to the point where it jolts me awake every night, and the only thing keeping me from ripping you off my neck is years of abuse under the guise of training."

Astarion stood there, eyes wide, seeing the man in front of him look disgusted, although not at him, Astarion understood with a start, but himself.

"I didn't want to inform you, in case it gave you pause from doing it. And, quite frankly, I had thought you would have felt my heart-rate increase when I was woken up, and were just ignoring it."

The elf thought back to every night he had drank from the half-orc, and realised that he had felt his breathing shift beneath him with his bite, that he had felt his pulse quicken as he drank. But he had been so lost in his blood that he had brushed it off as nothing more than a sleeping reaction. "I… I didn't know" he stammered, suddenly feeling very small, like he was back in Cazador's mansion, awaiting the torture to come. He let go of the hem of the half-orcs sleeve, playing with his own in a nervous fashion.

Grimodim sighed once again, rubbing his hand over his face. "It's fine, Astarion. Like I said, I'm in a unique position where I'm probably one of the few people here capable of withstanding it. Maybe Shadowheart with her training from Shar…." He trailed off for a moment, considering it. "And anyway, if I was that concerned over my own wellbeing, I wouldn't offer."

"This whole 'being concerned for others' is horrible you know. How can I drink from you knowing that?"

"The same way you tried to manipulate me in the beginning to like you. It wouldn't even be something you'd have to pretend to do, elf. Just think of me as another target, and enjoy yourself. Enjoy your safety. I'm not someone you have to concern yourself with." Grimodim took a step back. "We move out in 10 minutes. Get ready." And with that, he turned away, out of reach of Astarion.

The elf so desperately wanted to grab onto him again and tell him he was wrong but… Was he? His stomach churned. There was a question hanging in the air, unable to be uttered into existence. Why did he care? Why did he suddenly find himself dreading the thought of hurting Grimodim.

A feeling best squashed down and considered later.

[thekaijudude]

Ok, so as I’m writing this sentence, I just uploaded a speed art of me drawing another form of Milave: Mythical Mode. By the way, I decided not to try and make his base form look more like a pure fusion… for a rather large number of reasons. However, for Mythical Mode, I tried to take the aesthetic I was going for and… really try for it to be comparable to Saga.

Also, if you don’t think this is, at the very least, significantly closer to Saga… I’ll genuinely have some serious, serious questions for you about that one, lmao. For one thing, I’d ask how it’s still not comparable to Saga, and for the other, I’d ask how you think I can possibly fit more detail in.

Plus, seeing as this one took 20 to 30 minutes longer than the base form (which took over 40 minutes to design), I’m probably going to have a panic attack if you don’t think it’s comparable to Saga. So yeah, this paragraph and the one above are just a massive rant about how I’m really, really hoping you think this design is comparable to Saga.

Btw, that's not me trying to make you feel guilty for your opinion, even if that opinion ends up being that it’s still not on the level of Saga’s design. Nor am I trying to get you to lie to me about it.

Anyway, the questions still remain the same, but with an additional question this time: 

—What would this design look like as a suit?

——Where would you rank the suit with this design on a scale of 1 to 30, and where would that be in relation to Saga on said scale?

——Comparing the design’s complexity to Saga, how expensive do you think it would be to produce a suit with this design at the same level of quality as Saga’s suit?

Ah yes this is more like it

But it seems that you actually take your art very seriously tbh so you should actually upload them on your own blog and start your own thing over there as I have artist friends that do the same and actually build their brand cause u definitely can't do it over here since my blog isn't geared towards this tbh

Otherwise,

1) ya as said, this definitely looks more like a pure fusion, otherwise the only criticism is just literally the body proportions itself are wonky af (arms too thick, face looks squashed, why are the eyes tilted so vertically?)

2) 20/30, could definitely do something about the abdomen, and the color scheme is too varied and dosent flow well like Saga's. And ngl, the horns are really squashing the face too much

3) it'll probably actually cost less since as pointed out above, the "collapsing" theme isn't as consistent as Saga's

Thanks for the question!

[insecxreasalwqys]

a pooh bear’s love

This was per @a-simp-20​ ‘s request :) its a yuzuru hanyu x fem! Reader. This will probably suck, bc i dont read or necessarily like x readers in general. There are definitely writers who can write good x readers, but im not one of them. I dont write romance in general, so bear with me, please :).

The press conference left you perhaps a little bummed, but atleast you could watch his shows in the future! As you saw him, you decided to walk up to him.  (This will probably be the worst written part out of all of this, so proceed with caution, lmao. I also dont know how people even ask for autographs, so.)

“Excuse me?” You said. Yuzuru stopped walking, and turned towards you. “Hm?” “Ah, not to bother you, or anything, but could you sign this?” You asked, holding out your pooh-bear. He nodded once, and you handed your bear and pen over.  “Whats your name?” Yuzuru asked, writing a little note. “(Whatever your pretty name is, idk.)” You answered. Hanyu smiled and handed the bear back to you. “Thank you.” You smiled back. As you turned around, you heard a voice call out from behind you. You turned back around, and saw that it was yuzuru. “I was wondering, if you wanted to meet up at, perhaps, the mall nearby? Its fine if you dont want to.” He asked. You smiled a bit, but was in a little disbelief. You agreed. He told you where it was, again, to avoid confusion. After a while, you guys settled for 3 tomorrow.  “Thanks, again.” You said, before leaving. 

You woke up, with a small strip of light next to you. You yawned, before getting up. You smiled a bit, and continued on with the morning in a good mood.  You made sure to drive carefully today, not that you didnt everyday, but, you get the point, okay? It was nice outside, not too hot, yet not too cold.  When you got there, you didnt see yuzuru. You remembered that he hadnt told you where to go. You sighed, before starting to look around.  Yuzurus pov bc yes

 How is one late when they were the one offering to meet up? I thought to myself. It was 3:05. I entered the building, only to realize I hadn’t told her where to meet. I buried my face in my hands, before going to the nearest store.  Not in his pov anymore? Your pov? Idk what to call it.  You still hadn’t found him. You had already been in 2 other stores, probably looking like a maniac to other people. You saw another store close to you, so you entered it.

You were going through the sections of the store. “Nope, no Yuzu.” You mumbled under your breath. Before turning around, only for something to catch your eye.  yuzus pov 

Now, where would she be? I wondered. I might as well just go into a store randomly. Why not? I walked in. “Hi, welcome to (whatever idk you choose)” A worker said. I nodded with a smile, before looking around the store.  I had been looking for a few minutes, before I saw the colors red and yellow. I turned to look. Awh. I saw you grabbing a pooh bear. “Were you hiding there, or something?” I said.  your pov. Ig.  You jumped a bit, before seeing that it was Yuzuru. You let out a laugh, before getting up. “Where were you?” You asked. “It was traffic.” Yuzuru replied. “Ah. Okay.” You said. 

AhEm. Never. Again. Better for you and me both, love. I took 5 decades to finish this. Started on july 19 ended on august 7 :). I have never heard of procrastination in my life. I never once got stuck on this fic and just wrote 😍 ykyk bc im an amazing writer. Right? No, but you have yourself a good day. Or atleast try your best to after reading whatever this thing was. Love ya

                    -insecure (or gabby ig)

[waithyuck]

best friends give each other head (?)

pairing: lee donghyuck/haechan x reader (f)

genre: smut and there’s barely a plot lmao, no backstory no nothin

word count: 3.4k

warnings: female reader, oral sex (m & f receiving), swearing/explicit language, unprotected sex, best friend!hyuck, best friends to ???? idk man, hyuck is soft but also cocky so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯, also ig dom!hyuck sorry for all you sub!hyuck enthusiasts out there I’ll write one for ya eventually

a/n: Ik this trope has been done a lot but this is for raya ( @gohyuck ) bc we’re both thirsty hoes,,,,,also I’ve never actually ever sucked a dick so like sorry for any inaccuracies 😬 I was excited ab this so it isn’t proof read sorry in advance lmao

——

“would you teach me how to suck a dick if I gave you 20 bucks?” you blurted out, your face already feeling hot as you stood at the kitchen counter with your best friend, lee donghyuck. he immediately froze, his hands completely ceasing as he slowly lowers the knife he was using to spread cream cheese on his bagel. you bit your lip anxiously, taking a small step back when his head ever so slowly turned in your direction, his eyes meeting your gaze.

“you–I–what??” he questioned exasperated, a dusty pink hue gracing his cheeks as his eyes practically bulged out of their sockets. you both stared at each other, his mouth agape as you tried to calm your racing heart enough so that you could speak.

“look, I’ve never sucked a dick before and I want to learn—“

“you want to suck my dick?” he cut you off, dropping the knife onto the counter with a loud clatter. he looked at you like you were insane, which didn’t help your already unconfident demeanor. you sighed, your hand going up to pinch the bridge of your nose in frustration.

“No–well yes, I guess.” you pondered over the idea, “I just want to learn in case future adventures with dudes come into play!” you tried to explain, your arms now wildly gesticulating in the air giving away how nervous you actually were. that, and how your voice was coming out extra pitchy and how your words jumbled together as you spoke too quickly gave him insight into how you actually felt in the moment.

he stepped a little closer to you, his eyes narrowing and looking at you up and down in a scrutinizing way. you gulped as he watched you, your hands wringing together. he hummed deeply, the noise coming from within his chest making your legs instinctively squeeze together. you cursed yourself in that moment, screaming at yourself internally for finding your best friend attractive.

“so you’ve really never given anyone a blowjob?” hyuck asked, his head tilting to the side causing his hair to fall over his eyes. “that’s kinda surprising.”

your eyes widened, your cheeks on fire as your jaw dropped to the floor. “I mean,” he continued, his hand coming up to press his thumb against your bottom lip, trailing it across the flesh as you screamed internally. “you’re so pretty, I assumed guys were just dying to shove their cocks down your throat.” he chuckled to himself at the way you were reacting, taking pride in how much you were affected by the smallest touches.

you stood there shocked for a second, allowing his touch to poison your mind. after a minute you finally snapped yourself out of it, shoving his arm away from you and then pushing his shoulders back in anger.

“stop fucking with me, lee donghyuck.” you seethed, embarrassed and agitated. “just say no if you don’t want to.” you rolled your eyes at him and made your way to step around him to leave and hide in your room, but before you could get far his hand caught your waist and pulled you back.

“I’m not saying no,” he murmured lowly, his arms wrapping fully around you and pulling your back to rest up against his front. “it’s not everyday that my beautiful best friend offers to suck me off.”

your hand clutched his forearm shakily as he whispered in your ear, his words barely registering in your brain. nerves were flowing through your veins, causing your fingers to feel cold and your bones to chill. you didn’t reply, as you didn’t trust you voice to come out as steady as you would like. he obviously caught on to your nervousness, laughing lowly in your ear.

“what happened to all that confidence you had, y/n?” he teased, kissing the skin right below your ear. “is a couple of lewd words all it takes to get you flustered?”

you sputtered at his words, failing to find the right things to say in reply. what were you even supposed to say to that anyway? if you lied and told him no, he would definitely call your bluff, as it was pretty obvious how much you were affected. if you told him yes, you would probably feel further embarrassed and just want to dive down into a deep hole and never come back out.

you stared blankly down at the floor below you, your lip trembling as you let your tongue out to trail across them. hyuck suddenly let go of you, moving away and walking out of the kitchen to situate himself on the sofa located in the living room. you absentmindedly followed him, your feet shuffling slowly to a stop as you watched him from the doorway. he sat down heavily, spreading his long legs wide. the gray sweatpants he wore had you practically drooling, and you brought a hand up to your lips just to make sure you weren’t.

he turned his head to look at you, hid eyes hooded and he lazily pointed to the spot on the floor between his legs.

“come here.” he demanded, the deep tone of his voice causing your knees to weaken. you hobbled over to him on shaky legs, reaching your destination and lowering yourself to your knees between his thighs. he watched your every move like a predator, a look you have never seen in the years you have been friends with donghyuck. you shivered, a tingly pleasurable feeling running up your spine caused by his hungry and wandering eyes.

when your knees finally touched the carpeted floor, hyuck leaned forward, his fingers gently capturing your chin and forcing you to look at him. his eyes bore into yours before you watched them trail down your face to settle on your slightly parted lips. you watched him with doe eyes, looking innocent while in such a compromised position.

“Are you absolutely sure you wanna do this, y/n?” he asked you sincerely, his eyes never leaving your lips. you only nodded before breaking out of his hold, leaning up to grip the band of his sweatpants. he allowed you to pull them down and off of him, his body leaning back and his hips lifting up to make it easier for you.

you were surprised to see that he had no boxers on, the heat inside you ever growing at the sight of his pretty cock. he smirked down at you, his hand reaching down to stroke himself for you.

“w-wait, I wanna do it,” you stuttered, your hands moving to slap his own away. he hummed at you, watching as your fingers wrapped around him and began shyly working him up and down. hyuck cursed at the feeling of your warm hand around him, causing your confidence to build. you rubbed him a little faster, your grip growing a little tighter as you went on, his low groans spurring you on.

in no time at all he was completely hard, his cock standing proud in your hold. your mouth watered at the sight, and you wanted to dive in as soon as possible. you licked your lips anxiously, looking up at him for further instructions. he smiled down at you, his hand coming to rest on the top of your head. “Relax” he murmured, “just put your mouth on it and go with the flow.”

“wow hyuck, you’re such a great teacher.” you commented sarcastically, rolling your eyes. you weren’t expecting his hand to move down to lightly slap your cheek, and you squeaked at the suddenness of it.

“better check that attitude, baby,” his hand went back to your head, this time guiding you toward his dick with slight force. “you asked for this, remember?” you let your lips brush against his head, trying to think of everything you’ve read about blowjobs in the past. “I never said i was a good teacher.” after that comment he finally shut up, allowing you to collect your thoughts and press soft kisses up and down his length.

you didn’t tease for too long, recalling something you read about some people not liking it very much, and finally started suckling on the head of his cock. his head fell back against the couch, his hair splaying out every which way beautifully behind him.

you looked up at him, his eyes hooded as they peered down at you, your mouth finally opening to take in his cock, carefully, you made sure not to use your teeth, and you took as much as you could into your mouth, only stopping when your throat protested. your throat constricted slightly and his hips bucked into your mouth, causing his cockhead to ram itself down your throat and you gagged violently. you pulled back a little, tears springing to your eyes as your throat burned, your sputtering causing hyuck to pull you off of him completely.

‘fuck, I’m sorry baby, I’m sorry,” he spoke softly, his thumb coming up to wipe your stray tears away. you tried to ignore the name he called you, but you felt your heart jump not matter how hard you tried to will it not to. drool was already running down your chin and you were sure you looked pathetic sitting there on your knees in front of him, not being able to take his cock. “are you okay?”

you nodded, just then noticing the sudden ache in your core. it wasn’t there until he rammed his cock into your throat, which made you slightly nervous at the insinuation that you enjoyed choking on him.

he gently stroked your cheek, watching you carefully as you got your breathing back to normal. determined, you fixed your posture and pushed his hand off your face, moving to take his dick into your mouth once again. he didn’t stop you, allowing you to take him into your throat. you made sure you relaxed your muscles this time, breathing evenly through your nose as you began to bob your head. you felt the sudden presence of both of his hands finding your head, lightly caressing you as you blew him. from the sounds you could hear coming from deep within his chest, you could infer that you were doing a pretty good job so far.

“oh god, so good baby,” he moaned out, spurring you on to go a little faster and take him a litter deeper. “fuck! are you sure you’ve never done this before?” he questioned, his voice coming out breathy as he whined in pleasure. you just kept looking at him, your eyes glassy with tears as you forced him down your throat, being careful not to gag around the thickness of him.

he kept whining, his voice raising a few octaves when you experimentally kneaded his balls, and before you could go any further he shoved your head away, his cock falling from your mouth and causing a mess of spit to spill past your lips. looking up at him with a curious look, you wiped your mouth with the back of you hand.

“what the hell? I wanna make you cum!” you whined, embarrassed at the sound of your own confession. he was breathing heavily, his cock angry and flushed red, desperate to cum.

“I wanna taste you first,” he blurted, his hands already reaching to grip your arms and pull you up off of your knees. he shifted so that you could lay on your back on the cushions, and he pushed you down almost aggressively. you yelped, but didn’t fight him as he laid you down the way he wanted to. “...please?”

and how could you say no to him when he asked so very nicely? you let a small “okay” slip out of your mouth, your arms coming up to cover your face as he worked on getting your shorts and panties off. you peeked to see that he was now completely naked, his shirt discarded somewhere across the room.

donghyuck spread you thighs apart and was pleasantly surprised to see how wet you were already, smirking to himself at how much you were affected when you were sucking his cock. you whimpered embarrassingly as he stared at your soaked pussy, hunger present in his eyes as he licked his lips. he hands pinned your thighs down as he dove in earnestly, not wasting any time.

his tongue dipped into your hole before licking a stripe up your slit, brushing along your clit and causing your stomach muscles to spasm. he worked your clit with his mouth, licking and sucking like it was his job.

you squirmed in his hold, your little noises of pleasure reaching his ears and egging him on, determined to make you cum as hard as you could.

your hands flew to his long light brown locks, fisting them and tugging when he nipped your sensitive bud. he groaned at the painful pleasure caused by your pulling, his cock twitching in response. you were biting your lip, definitely causing permanent indentations with how hard you were holding it between your teeth. you couldn’t hold back your sounds, loud moans filling the air as his ministrations brought you closer and closer to release. you never thought about it before, but you never would have guessed hyuck was this good at eating pussy.

he slowly inserted two fingers into your core, causing your walls to experimentally clench. you practically yelled out at the added sensation of being filled, your sounds turning into pleas.

“please hyuck,” you whimpered, pulling his hair to lift his head to look at you, his eyes finding yours while his tongue laid flat on your clit. “please fuck me, please,” you were almost crying at this point, desperately wanting to be filled by the same cock you had been blowing not too long ago. you felt pitiful, begging to be fucked liked this by your best friend, but you were too far gone to stop now, and in too deep to care.

within seconds he sped up his fingers, sucking even harder on your clit as you thrashed below him. you couldn’t even collect yourself before your orgasm hit, rippling in waves as you clenched around his sopping fingers. he continued to eat you out as you rode your orgasm, only stopping when you tugged on his hair again.

he pulled his head back, his fingers slipping out of you. he brought said fingers to his mouth, lewdly sucking your juices off of them as he maintained eye contact with you.

“get up,” he demanded, pulling your body from the couch and helping you gain your balance on your noticeably trembling legs. you whined, your brain still foggy from the orgasm he gave you with his mouth. he softly shushed you, helping you to the end of the couch before he pressed you down to bend over the arm of it. you yelped in surprise, but nonetheless let your body become pliant as he positioned your body the way he wanted.

“It's okay baby,” he mouthed against the back of your neck, his chest hovering over your back now. “ i'm gonna give you my cock.” he spoke softly, running his hands up and down your sides in an attempt to calm you as you squirmed aimlessly, desperate for him to fill you up.

you absentmindedly wigged your hips against him, your behind brushing against his extremely hard and dripping cock. he groaned at the friction, sinking his teeth ever so slightly into your skin. he pulled himself up, and before you could complain at the loss of his warmth, you felt his hand come down on your ass. you squealed and heard him laugh as he kneaded the flesh, soothing the pain.

“you want it so bad, don't you, y/n?” they way he said your name was sinful, and the most you could do was frantically nod and whine out several slurred versions of the word ‘yes’. he didn’t make you wait much longer, and you sighed happily once you felt the blunt head of his cock push and pull through your folds, effectively being covered in your excessive wetness.

he swiftly entered you, giving you absolutely no time to get accustomed to his size before he started drilling into you, his hips slapping obscenely against your ass with each harsh thrust. your voice cried out gutterly with each movement he made, your throat feeling raw from the way you were screaming. your walls were sensitive from your previous orgasm, which made the scrape of his dick against them painfully pleasurable. It was almost too much, but you took every inch of him like a good girl just like he wanted.

his hands were gripping your hips, pulling your body back onto his cock with every drive of it inside you. the blunt edges of his nails were piercing your skin, for sure causing you to bleed. you were definitely too far gone now to care; your eyes squeezed shut in pleasure as drool dripped down your bottom lip.

the two of you didn’t say much to each other, but you were very far from being silent. mixed with your airy cries were his deeper grunts and moans, and with every one that reached your ears your pussy involuntarily clenched, causing his noises to come out even louder for your listening pleasure.

he suddenly bent forward, his chest coming down to rest against your back once again as he slowed down and grinded his cock into you. he was so deep inside you, the tip of him was brushing against that sweet spot, making your walls flutter around him happily.

he nudged his head against the side of yours, his lips coming down to kiss your cheek sweetly, a complete contrast to the way he was fucking you mere seconds ago. you weakly opened your eyes to look at him, your eyes moving all the way to the side to meet his own. hyuck groaned as your pussy clenched once more around him, looking directly into your watery eyes as his soft breath hit your face. surprising yourself, you desperately leaned forward and took his lips against yours, kissing him passionately as his cock still worked inside you. as he kissed you back, you felt his fingers slide to your clit, your body jumping in his hold as he began playing with the sensitive nub. his tongue invaded your mouth first, toying with your own playfully before pulling away entirely, leaving you wanting more.

he was getting close, you could tell. his hips pinned yours against the couch with each powerful grind. he positioned his arms on either side of you, using the leverage to thrust into you once again. your clit was abandoned, but the way he pounded you still had your orgasm dancing on the edge of breaking. his thrusts became sloppy and aggressive, his breathing ragged and small whines leaving him as he worked hard to chase his release. you squeaked at the sensation, and before you knew it you were being thrown over the edge for the second time.

the white, hot pleasure enveloped your entire body, your mind going numb as your pussy spasmed hard, causing donghyuck to seize up on top of you and spill his scorching cum inside you. you barely registered the feeling of his cum splattering against your walls, flowing deep. as you came down from your high, your body felt weak and your chest heaved from the effort of the orgasm you experienced. hyuck collapsed against your back, effectively crushing you against the arm of the couch. you grumbled underneath him, squirming but then immediately regretted it as it caused his cock to move against your sensitive walls. to make matters worse, his hips involuntarily bucked into you, causing you to hiss at the overstimulation and you heard him yelp as well.

hyuck gently kissed your shoulder before pulling out of you, his cum almost immediately following, dripping down onto your already soaked thighs. he helped you clean yourself up and was kind enough not to laugh as you limped to sit comfortably on the cushions of the sofa. He joined you, and you both sat together, breathing softly in each other’s company.

“so uh,” hyuck started, his eyes looking over at you and trying not to admire the way you were glowing in the soft light of the room. “do i still get that 20 bucks or…?”

he didn't have enough time to escape before you leaned over and started whacking his shoulder, his giggles sounding off loudly across the room. donghyuck may not have gotten $20 from you, but he was sure he would get to have you and call you his from now on.

——

[miggydiaz]

For the salty ask 1, 4, 5, 6, 9, 10, 14, 16, 20, 22, 23 and 26 for cobra kai pretty please

My answers are so long, so I am putting this under the cut @wonderwolfballoon! Also I just noticed your Daniel icon I SWEAR I’M NOT DRAGGING HIM TO BE MEAN!!!

1. What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get?* My biggest IDGI ships for CK are probably Elimetri or Kiaz. I’m not here to yuck other people’s yums or anything, but I do think there is something to the idea that Migueli isn’t popular because it’s a ship predicated on mutual respect for one another. Kiaz has the obvious enemies to lovers vibe and I just generally don’t sail those ships. Elimetri has... its problems, IMO, most especially around the idea that Demetri has to like... save Hawk from himself? Idk. I just like romances that I feel are based on love and mutual respect and not ...tropes.

 I am also not a Lawrusso shipper although I have a lot of those on my dash and you all are great! Again, not yucking yums! Daniel just makes me want to head butt him too much to pair him romantically with anyone 😂 I don’t even want his wife with him. He needs to self reflect~ 

4. Do you have a NoTP in your fandom? Are they a popular OTP?* 

I once saw someone ship Amanda and Anoush and I noped out of that so fucking fast I almost tripped over myself. I’m not sure if they’re popular. I just think some people feel the need to get Amanda out of the way to sail their ship and stuck her with Anoush which... no. Just no. Let Amanda be a messy single queen with a martini hobby, thanks! 

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?* 

Not in CK. I’m lucky because I pretty much stick to my little Migueli bubble and I’m okay with that? Lmao lord knows the Squad on my dash is all about the DISCOURSE™️ so idk if I just don’t feel the need to get sucked into the wider ship wars because we have good healthy debates, but so far, so good. 

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?* 

I never hated it... I just didn’t have many feelings on shipping with this show in general at first. Then I was in the CK tag one day and I saw Migueli fan art. Then I discovered @afurioushawk‘s falconry series and it was all over for me after that! So fandom DID make me love a ship, just not one I hated.

9. Most disliked character(s)? Why? Oh boy. How much time do you have? In some instances, it’s a good thing season 3 happened because otherwise, this would be a multi-page essay on the problems with race and class privilege as it pertains to Sam LaRusso and just some... generally not nice comments about Demetri that I’m conflicted about because I’m not sure if the writers are intentionally trying to write him a specific way and it’s just not translating to me or what. But season 3 revamped both of their images with me a lot. I’m way more flexible in terms of Demetri, but lmao I was the number one Sam LaRusso hater for a minute there (or maybe number 2, I can think of at least 1 other person who was in that boat with me back in like... August/September, but I won’t call them out because I don’t want them to get hate...) However, I have grown a bit in my opinions of Sam, and even though I still think she’s responsible  for a lot of shit she NEVER gets held accountable for, I also think that’s a reflection of the adults around her too, and this includes my otherwise unproblematic queen, Amanda.

But honestly, my most hated character (other than the obvious villain that is Kreese) is Daniel. No matter how handsome Ralph Macchio looks in cable-knits, because Daniel has always been a sanctimonious, shit starting drama king and I say that about KK Daniel too. I’m not saying Daniel was the ~true villain~ or anything, or that Johnny was innocent -- I can only drink so much Red and Yellow Kool-Aid -- but Daniel’s always been annoying to me as a protagonist, and turning him into a smarmy wealthy car salesman who is also a class traitor did not do him any favors in my book. I will say, I also like Daniel more in season 3 than I have in previous season, but since he is the adult, I will be mad at him longer than I will be at the kids, ya feel?

10. Most disliked arc? Why?

 Johnny’s entire season 3 storyline. The sheer level of REGRESSION at every turn drives me bonkers. It’s like watching him go through all of the stumbling blocks of season 1 all over again, but without the “he’s learning! He’s going to make mistakes!” free pass that I was willing to give him the first time around. He regularly jeopardizes Miguel’s recovery and it’s played for laughs. He fucks up on every level with Robby. He spends most of his time running away when things get hard or too real. He drops the ball completely with Hawk, and like, not to put too fine a point on it, but a lot of Hawk’s issues are because Johnny put Hawk on this ‘flip the script and be a badass’ path and then offered him no guidance for how to walk that path and instead left him in the hands of Kreese. And then he has the nerve to go to Hawk and basically be like “I made you what you are!” lmao yeah Johnny, you sure did, that’s why he’s breaking peoples arms, hoss. And then all of the nonsense with Ali and Carmen, like... if you were planning on teasing KK fans with Ali and him getting back together, why write her as married in the first place? Why even tease the idea of Carmen and Johnny until after you were sure what you were going to do with Ali as a character? Instead, they do what they did in season 3 and it makes him look like a colossal jerk. So yeah. Literally every choice they made with Johnny this season, I hated.

14. Unpopular opinion about your fandom? People who hate Tory are not valid, sorry not sorry.

16. If you could change anything in the show, what would you change? I would have kept Miguel entirely out of Tory and Sam’s beef. Or at least not directly inserted him into it like he was with the kiss. I know the writers thought it was necessary to push Tory to the point of inciting a fight at school, but I am just so exhausted over girls being unable to fight about anything but boys. Also I would bring Aisha back.

20. What is the purest ship in the fandom? 

I am probably biased, but I still maintain it’s Migueli. Look, Miguel stood up to Kyler for Eli and Demetri both. Hawk joined CK because he saw what it could do for some skinny nerd who was getting his ass kicked. And he took to CK, really took to it! Even flourished before he started getting mixed messages. And he and Miguel were pretty much inseparable after that. They coordinated their wardrobes ffs. Hawk dubbed him El Serpiente and no one else calls him that — it’s Hawk’s nickname for him. Miguel confides in Hawk only secondary to Johnny, who is like a father to him. The entire Coyote Creek exchange shows they can fight and disagree but... well, to use the cliche, they don’t go to bed angry, you know? They’re square the very next day. Hawk is the first person at Miguel’s side when he gets kicked over the balcony and the LOOK he gives the second floor where Robby is? That boy is out for blood immediately to avenge Miguel. So much of his s3 behavior is fueled by that need for vengeance because MD is wholly responsible for what happened to Miguel. And Miguel is so confused and betrayed by Hawk’s shift in behavior, and yet still holds out hope that Hawk will see through Kreese’s BS and come with him to The Dojo I Refuse to Name. And when Hawk does make that deflection finally, he shows up at MD with Miguel. There’s so much more that I know I’m missing but whether someone ships them or not, that is a tried and true love and respect for one another, a willingness to fight for and defend one another that you don’t often see in TV friendships... or even in most tv relationships. And I just think that’s the best ❤️

22. Popular character you hate?

 Daniel, hands down. I mean... I don’t even necessarily hate Daniel, you know? I just think it’s really, pardon the pun, rich that a guy of immense wealth and privilege can’t get a therapist or turn to his far too patient wife for help with his existential crisis over his high school bully opening up a karate dojo to make some money and help a kid who is getting the crap kicked out of him. I get that Daniel’s narrative is necessary for the rivalry, but it does nothing to make him sympathetic as a character.

23. Unpopular character you love?

 Tory, definitely! Everyone hates her and then there’s me and the Squad over here banging away on our Coors Banquet cans yelling TORY RIGHTS! Seriously she catches so much flack for a teenage girl who is... the sole income provider for her family? At 17? While caring for a sick mom and a little brother? And fending off a creepy landlord? Tory has it so rough and then she meets a cool girl at her dojo who asks her to hang out at some fancy ass country club which is probably the nicest place Tory has ever been in, and then she gets talked down to and accused of being a thief and has another girl lay hands on her, only to find out that same girl is her new boyfriend’s ex and... ugh. I HATE that Tory gets shit all over when Tory and Sam wouldn’t even have beef if Sam had apologized to Tory as she SHOULD have. Tory isn’t innocent, but damn, I’d be pressed too.

 My other unpopular character I love? Nathaniel. Seriously that kid is THE best. He’s a literal child but is out there like I WILL FUCK YOU UP, even though he’s MD. Honestly, his Cobra Kai energy is so ferocious I won’t be surprised if he moves back to CK eventually. Anyway, I love him.


26. Most shippable character?

 Miguel, hands down. It’s because he’s so affable and sweet overall. And because his hair is so fluffy and pettable that no one can resist touching it. I like to imagine that one day he and Hawk are talking about their hair and Hawk makes a joke about how Miguel’s mane is getting so long that it’s going to be bigger than his own, and then he reaches out to ruffle it and internally has a bisexual meltdown because oh no IT’S SO SOFT AND NICE. But uh... anyway, yes. Definitely Miguel.

[becumsh]

détentewonderful @thiswaycomessomethingwicked  tagged me in the First Line game, which is going to be fun!

Rules are: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line.

Good thing I’m not a ficwriter, so I don’t have a lot of works lmao.

ultima ratio

The Carmelite convent of the Saint-Jacques faubourg was a quiet, sombre place. The daughters of Saint Teresa only opened their mouths to sing holy hymns, and all flesh there, except for the time of prayer, kept silence before the Lord. An uninterrupted life went by unhurriedly, unperturbed by disturbances of the outside world.

Here Be Sleeping Dragons

“During their last term fifth-year students will practice Vanishing Spells, that can be applied to small animals; and I think that the introduction of lectures dedicated to basic mathematical formulae of Conjuring Spells for those who are planning on taking Transfiguration in the sixth year—”

“Wait”, there was a sound of lazy voice somewhere to his right. “Don’t you think that writing out all these formulae is a little bit… Muggle-like approach to magic?”

‘Dear Merlin, do you really give a toss about it, you snake bastard?’ Treville thought.

being alive can be so lonely sometimes (but i'm glad to have met you)

Five minutes before the alarm rings.

He squeezes his eyes shut before pressing the balls of his hands against the eyelids, feeling the deep-seated exhaustion in his bones, and gives himself exactly sixty seconds before getting up.

the promise

“Maybe I should write to my brother,” the Queen said uncertainly.

Treville did not want to be there. He did not want to discuss Richelieu’s future with his almost victim.

He wanted the make-shift council, Richelieu’s reckless and ludicrous plot to murder the Queen, he wanted all of it not to happen.

if you listen hard you will hear my breath

They came to him the next day asking to come back to Court.

"Cardinal..." Anne hesitated.

Richelieu looked at the window. He could bargain anything from her. The Queen had never been so weak and defeated. Powerless.

our disembodied state

He wakes up heaving for breath, his throat dry and raw.

“Here,” someone presses a glass to his chapped lips, and he drinks gratefully. “Oh, my dear Uncle, you gave us such a scare!”

The voice breaks and Richelieu opens his eyes.

détente

The rumours of the Queen Mother’s rapidly rising favourite had spread like wildfire, but Anne’s first meeting with him was purely accidental – she was walking with her ladies-in-waiting down a corridor of the Louvre and Concini and this Bishop stood in their way. Concini merely gave Anne and her consort a careless nod and walked round, but the cleric stopped, and bowed with a trick that took most courtiers years of practice: being quite tall he managed to look up.

no peace to the sword

In the Ninth Circle of Hell lie the traitors who betrayed those they held the closest, frozen in a lake of ice known as Cocytus. The icy hell of betrayal is the final result of consent to sin, the stage of being incapable of repentance.

night vale au

He returns in the early morning. Even though he’s never been here before. The town greets him with breezy wind and a salty drizzle of water down the collar of his jacket.

I like the one from ultima ratio the most, but I think it’s mostly because this fic is literally a lifetime project for me and I think so much about every line I write.

I might be wrong (and if anyone’s even remotely interested in this post, lmao, let me know). But when I say when I’m not a ficwriter, I’m like... I mean it? My main output are fanvideos, so I work with visuals and audio. 

So I feel like my first lines are very visual, setting up a scene like a first frame of a movie or something? And I also care about how the sentences sound, so when you read them inside your head there’s still a cadence to them. But I might be completely bullshitting this, because I feel like it, but it’s not necessarily how my fics are perceived.

Also I’m incapable of writing short sentences or anything short in general, but I attribute that to Russian being my first language and me being traumatised by Leo Tolstoy in high school.

@hobfilm @heyholmesletsgo - yas let’s go (only if ya want) bc thiswaycomessomethingwicked tagged all my writer friends too! coz we are all friends!

I have followers & mutuals who may be writers and I’m unaware of it so if you want to do it please consider yourselves tagged!

[kmelanin]

Hyunnie Baby

Hyunnie Baby

A/N~ Hi my Hyunniebuns. lol that was head ass. But okay so like i need yall to understand something. JEONGIN WILL NOT BE HAVING SEX IN THIS!!! but like he will be in some makeout sessions??? and if yall want more then maayybbeee. but like i know damn well half of hall were crazy at his age, so like sorry im a hardstan. like idk how to be soft. anywaysss...i wasnt going to post this, but when i seen it was over 10,000+ words I was like why not. 

Let me know if you would like to see more!

Warning: They are hybrids, so like yea. Also idk if things happend fast, and tbh i was stoned asf most of the time writing this. LOL. yea im warning yall, this might be a horrible story .-_-. 

Pairing~ lynxhyunjin X human yn X africanwilddogjeongin

______________________________

Jeongin-17/18 Hyunjin-18/19 Reader-20/21  (whatever age makes you happiest lmao)

You look up at the sign above you. E-Hybrids, it was a simple all black sign with white words. It was about a mile out of town. It had to have enough space to have suitable for all of the different Hybrids. This place let you adopt exotice hybrids. The government allows all sorts of hybrids to be adopted, only because they are hybrids.

You took time to do your research about hybrids. You found out that they weren’t able to actually shift into the animal they are, they just have a few characteristics. They were like test tube babies. They were made in a lab with human and animal DNA. They were made to be lovers, to be best friends, or to just be company. Whatever you want. But of course not everyone treats them right. Some were treated as actual pets, like actual trash.

You knew you always wanted a hybrid. You lived alone for that reason alone. You recently bought a home that had two bedrooms and two bathrooms. You've always dreamed about having one in your home, to be your best friend.

Honestly, you didn't know much people. You were always the odd one out. Everyone around you would remind you all the time about how different you were. Just because you were a little bigger than others doesn't mean you were different. But I guess that's how society works.

You dated two boys in your 20 years. But one just had a chub kink and one dated you because he was dared to.

But now at this point you tried not to care about anyone but yourself. You knew that hybrids would love you as long as you loved them. So maybe getting one would help your loneliness. They would love you no matter what. But you were nervous, because maybe your body is the main factor, if a hybrid couldn't be your friend then because of your body then you don't know what you would do. You were big boned, so you were always going to be thick.

You didn't care if your future hybrid didn't like you as a lover, a simple friendship would make you feel a lot better. But your heart jumped at the thought of them loving you, it made you giddy.

You walk up to the counter where a little red haired girl stand.

“Hello. Welcome to E-Hybrids, are you looking to adopt today?” She asks with a bright smile. You felt a little shy, and you didn't want to stutter so you just nod and smile a little. You tuck your hair behind you ears when she nodded back and pulled out a clipboard with some paper and a pen attached to it.

“I need you to fill this out. To make it easier choosing, we take what you fill out and we match you up to a couple of different hybrids to you, just to make everything easier. If that doesn't work then we can take you back, but it usually works” she explains and you nod along, showing that you understand. You read it through and start filling everything out. Your name, birthday, source of income, plus some more basic info. Then there was some on the type of animal you would like. You didn't want to put too much restriction on it, so you put feline or canine. The age you wanted, you put 18-21. There were some others and you quickly fill it out. Once you were finished you noticed that the lady was gone, so you stood and waited.

About five minutes later she comes back out of a door.

“Sorry, I was just getting the presenting room ready.” She explains and you hand over the clipboard. She quickly reads over it and she nods unclipping it and opening a sliding window off to the side and passing it through. Someone pops up and grabs it closing the window back.

“Okay, so my co-worker just took back your preferences to find hopefully you future hybrid. I noticed that you put canine or feline. I hope you know that here we have exoctic hybrids, so they won't be your normal dog and house cat.”

“Right, right.” Ah you were getting excited.

“Okay, so a few more things. The price depends on the hybrid you get, but if you would like to take them home today it will be a extra grab per hybrid.” You quickly nod. Suddenly a loud ding rings through the lobby area. “Perfect, so they found…” she looks down at the computer that also dinged with the louder one. “Three that matched your preferences. I will lead you to the presenting room, because they are part human, so you will be able to ask any questions you will like.” She smiles, she walks over to the gate that could let you through. She leads you through the door she came out of earlier.

It was a simple white room with two doors. One you come in and another. There was also a single chair.

“You sit here, we will give you ten minutes with each. After that just let me know who you want another ten with. After you are done meeting, either let me know if you are ready to choose, or let me know if you would like to see others. Have fun.” She smiles and leaves.

You sit down in the chair and you wait. You quickly look down and fix your posture and pull your shirt down a little to cover your gut up a little.

You were so nervous. You didn't have a certain type, but out of all of the hybrids you've seen, you've always felt drawn more towards the asian ones.

Suddenly the door opens. You head snaps to the other door and in comes the cutest little thing you've ever seen. He kept his eyes down as he walked towards you. His ear twitched which caught you eyes and you noticed how they were big and black, they were rounded with some tan spots. His hair was black and messy. He was wearing some black sweats and a white t-shirt. He walks in front of you and falls to his knees. He leans back on his heels so he sits comfortably.

You remembered on one of the websites you read that some hybrids are scared of meeting new people so they automatically submit so no one was afraid of them.

“Hi, I'm YN.” You say softly. You knew to start slow, let them get used to you. His ear twitched a little at the sound of your voice. “What’s your name?” you urge him on. You hoped you weren’t scaring him.

Slowly his head starts to raise and his eyes connect to yours.  His eyes widen when he took you in and you did the same. He was beautiful. His skin was so smooth and clear. His eyes are mono lidded which made the way he looked at you so much more intense.

“I'm Jeongin. My human side is Korean, and my animal side is African Wild Dog.” He says bowing his head down and then his eyes connect to yours once again. “What about you?” His head tilts a little and it was like his eyes were shining at you.

“Oh, I'm African American and Caucasian.” You say softly. You couldn't keep eye contact with him for long. His stare made your whole body buzz with nervousness. You looked down at your fingers, you started to fiddle with them.

“Oh? We both have some African in us?” His voice comes out a little higher. Your eyes snapped to his and he was smiling really big. It took you by surprise when you seen braces in his mouth. He must of seen the change in your emotions because his face fell.

“It's the braces huh? The other say that braces are dorky, so no one will want me.” He mumbles. You remembered reading that Hybrids were raised to be almost perfect. So by 18, they would have straight teeth from having to wear braces.

“Jeongin, how old are you?” You ask, remembering you put down 18-21. But his eyes widen and he leans up on his knees.

“I was told about your age range, I'm 17, but I fit all of the other things you written down but the age part. They were hoping it was okay.” He was panicking a little. His eyes were wide as his ears flattened against his head a little.

“Oh it's okay! It's okay.” You say trying to calm him down a little. You grab his hand unsure how to calm him. When you did his body tensed up and he squeezed your hand back and his eyes look down at them.

“I'm sorry, It just….I actually fit someones wants, and I was scared at first.” His eyes look back to you, his ears start to perk back up. “You are really really beautiful, I would love for you to adopt me YN.” He says and he raises your hand up to his lip and it shocked you when his lips touched the back of your hand and they were so soft. After his cheeks were burning red. You couldn't help but to giggle a little at how cute he was being.

“Did someone teach you that? Or did you come up with that all on your own?” You ask smiling at him. He keeps looking at you and away over and over as if he was to scared to look at you.

“I-I came up with it. I'm serious.” He says nervous, but you felt the seriousness in his voice. You nodded understanding. Did he really think you were...he had to be saying that just to say. You felt his hand squeeze yours again making your eyes look at his.

“You don't believe me? I don't lie, I don't think I can.” He says. You hated this feeling. You suddenly felt so much bigger than you actually were. You felt yourself start to panic. You can ruin something that barely had a chance to start.

“Jeongin, I'm 20 years old. I'm three years older than you. If I adopted you, would that bother you.” You say finally telling him your age. He shakes his head as soon as you were done talking.

“Of course not. That just means you are my Noona.” He says smiling hugely. The weird word he used threw you off a little.

“Noona?” You ask questioning him.

“Ya, the Korean side, we use that as a honorific.” He says and he starts to say something else but there was a rapid three knocks on the door. His face suddenly turned sad, he looked back to the door and back to you. Your heart broke when you seen how sad he looked.

“It was nice to meet you Noona.” He squeezes your hand once more and stands up pulling his hand away. Then he was gone.

About a minute later the door opens again and in comes two people, one has his head down and has really pretty tan pointy ears with black tips and another was the guy who grabbed your preference sheet.

“I'm sorry, the next one that was after the dog actually is sick and he is unable to come in contact with anyone. So here is the last one, let us know if you would like me to go and get some others.” He nods and leaves, leaving the hybrid in the room with you.

“Hi.” You say and his eyes snapped up to yours instantly shocking at how fast he looked up. Instead of walking over to you and sitting down like Jeongin, he walks sideways keeping his eyes on you. “What’s your name?” You ask smiling a little, you wanted to show him that you weren't going to hurt him. He kept his eyes on you still and he walked around you.

Based on your reading, you could tell he was a feline. He was stalking me getting a good sniff. Something his cat side does. Every hybrid was different. You stood up to say something since he was literally against the wall in front of you now. But a low growl escapes his mouth. It shocked you and you quickly say back down. You were scared, suddenly really nervous. He probably hated the way your body looked. He was probably wondering why his luck was so bad. You knew he could have way better owners.

You looked at him, you seen how his lips were plump and his skin was smooth and clear. His hair was black as well and messy like Jeongin. His eyes stared at you, his eyes were mono lidded as well, but unlike Jeongins intense soft stare. His was scary. You felt as if he was judging you.

“Ah, I'm sorry.” You say standing up and quickly walking towards the door before he could growl again. But once again you were stopped, not by his growl, but by his voice.

“Hyunjin. I'm Hyunjin. Please don't go.” You turned back and your knees almost gave out when he was right in front of you and he was peering down. He was so much taller than you. His face was still hard but you could see the sadness in his eyes.

You quickly nod. He bends down and grabs your hand and pulls you toward the chair, he sits you down then sits down cross legged in front of you on the floor.

“I'm sorry. I-you are-you scared me for a minute.” he says mumbling to himself. You probably scared him off with your rolls. “I heard you’re 20, I'm 18.” He says as he puts his other hand over yours. You didn't even realize that he was still holding your hand. “I'm part Korean, and part Lynx.” He says and his eyes flicked to yellow cat yes back. His ears looked so soft and you really wanted to touch them.

“You like my ears, huh?” He asks with a slight smile. “Go ahead and touch them.” he says quickly. You started to reach out, when the sudden three knock came. You eyes looked back down at him and his eyes were filled with sadness and his mouth was ajared. And it was like slow motion, he got up and walked away, his tail was swaying really fast. And you knew just by the basic house cat, he was irritated.

After a few minutes of getting yourself together, you finally left the room and met the lady at the front.

“Soo, how did it go?” She asks. “I'm sorry about Joji, he told us last minute that he was sick. So it was only the two. I can get others if you would like.” She says. She talks really fast so you just nodded taking the extra time to comprehend what she said.

“Actually, how much are the two?” When she told you, your eyes bugged out. You found out that Hyunjin was quite expensive, but Jeongin was in your budget so you weren't able to have both of them. Which is fine because you feel greedy already for wanting both of them.

“But, i have a little deal for you since this is your first time here. If you get Jeongin you will have to deal with his braces. So If you get Hyunjin, I hate putting it this way because they are priceless, but you will get both for the price of Hyunjin. Think of it as also a apology for not giving you your prefered age range.” She bows a little. You were shocked. This was...did you want two hybrids? Will they even like each other? A canine and a feline?

“I will say that the grand each to take home today is still in tack.” She says with a sorry face.

“Okay, why the hell not.”

“Perfect! I will give you a list of food they both eat and things you will need to buy. How would you like to tell them?”

“Um, I want to go to there room and tell them. Maybe trick them a little?” You say shrugging. She laughs a little nodding. She told you that she will get them to their rooms. Then she gets a map of the building and draws out directions.

You are soon walking towards Jeongin room. The hallways were extremely bare and so were all the doors. You only know you found his room because of the easy directions and the simple black numbers on the door. You didn't know what to do but knock. You waited a couple of seconds and until his door beeps and it opens. You peer in and see him laying down on his bed.

“Is it time to eat alread-” He pauses when he looks up and sees you and he stops talking. His eyes were wide and he slowly stands up. You were surprised at how much taller he was than you. But he was shorter than Hyunjin. You only knew because with Hyungjin, when he was in front of you, you had to look up to meet his eyes. But with Jeongin, when he walks up to you, you didn't have to look up as much as you did.

“Hi Jeongin.” You say softly, but you try to keep your excitement in, so it ends up coming out sadder than expected. You noticed that he noticed how your voice was. You knew that Hybrids were very observative.

“Hi Noona, did you come to say goodbye?” He asks, even though he was sad, he didn't want to make it more difficult for you. He thought you both had a little connection. But maybe his age was the final factor. He was too young for you, even though he was turning 18 in a couple of weeks.

“Goodbye? I was just coming to ask if you are ready to come home.” You say acting as if you didn't know what he was talking about. His face goes from a sad smile and cute puppy eyes to a surprised look, his mouth fell open and notice that his tail started to wag really fast. You looked at it and it was so cute and fluffy, his tail went from white to the tips to some brown and you weren't sure what the base look like.

“Really? You want me?!” He jumps up and down for a second with his eyes closed. But his eyes snapped open and looked at you, it was like he forgot you were there. He stops jumping and clears his throat. “You...want me?” He asks a slower than before.

“I do, if only you allow it though, I don't want to force.” You say, you didn't want him to go with someone he didn't want to. And with knowing the past, you wouldn't be surprised.

“Of course I do, Noona!” He says a little louder, he bent down to connect your eyes. You tend to look down a lot. You hated to see the looks you got. “You are so cute when blush.” he says looking all over your face. That caused your cheeks to burn even harder.

“Uhm, Hyunjin is coming home with us as well.” You say trying to move things forward.

“Hyunjin? The Lynx?” He asks his face dropping a little. You frowned in confusion. “He agreed? He always talks about his future family. They were suppose to come get him on his 18th birthday. He first met them when he was 6, and every year on his birthday since then. But when his 18th birthday came, they didn't. 6 months later, here we are.” Jeongin says softly. His words broke your heart. You couldn't help but to think, maybe he will come just to run away and try to find that family. You sighed.

“Well, let’s go see if he wants to come home with us.” You say grabbing his hand. He quickly nods and tells you he knows where his room is. You both walk down a couple of hallways and turn a few times. We stop in front of a door and you reach up and knock. The door beeps and it opens. You look in to see the Lynx sitting on his bed staring back at you. But then his eyes move to the being next to me, and he scoffs.

“So you picked the wild dog over me?” He asks, he looks away shaking his head.

“Hyun-”

“Can you leave?” He asks growling a little snapping his head back to you. That made Jeongin squeeze your hand a little. He pulls you back and he stands in front of you. But you noticed that he doesn't look at Hyunjin in the eyes. He keeps his down, but he won't budge from his spot in front of you. He was protecting you from what he thought was potential danger.

You thought about his suppose future family, maybe he wanted to stay here and wait to see if they do come. You understood he still had hope. You stood on your tippy toes over Jeongin shoulder to look at Hyunjin.

“I couldn’t choose between both of you. And I wanted to come and tell you both in person. But I understand if you want us to leave.” You sighed, standing on your feet normally. “I understand.” You pull on Jeongin’s hand wanting to leave. Your chest kind of hurt, he didn't want you. Jeongin was happy to leave, he pulled you down the hall. As he did you looked back and was shocked to see Hyunjin standing outside of his room staring at you as Jeongin pulled you along. He looked devastated. But your body was on autopilot, your empty hand reached out towards him. And instantly his eyes flickered to his yellow cat eyes and he runs after you. When his hand connected with yours, he had a huge smile plastered on his face. When Jeongin looked back it quickly disappeared.

“Finally, I knew you were not dumb Hyunjin.” Jeongin says looking back.

PART 2~

You finally walk into your home with the two behind you. It was only one level with a basement. You knew you messed up when you realized there were only two bedrooms, but now three people.

“So, It isn’t much. I actually didn't expect to have both of you here.” You say as the two hybrids look around your living room, which your front door was attached to. “So there are only two bedrooms. We will figure out sleeping arrangements later. Are you guys hungry?” You ask taking your shoes off and you pull out a needs list that the shelter gave you. You noticed that the only proteins they both can have is white meat and seafood. They could also have veggies and fruits, and noodles, and some dairy.

Both Hyunjin and Jeongin take off their shoes and they follow you to the kitchen.

Oh god, you weren’t used to this. Having two beings follow you around.

“Mhm, how about I show you around first then I’ll cook dinner.” You say peeping at the clock. You didn't realize how late it was. It was currently ten at night, and you were just getting home. Man, maybe a slight snack.

You show them around the kitchen, showing them everything that was available to use, then you go to the tv and show them how to turn on Youtube, or Netflix. Then you go to the first full bathroom, then the bedroom right across the hall. Then you show your bedroom and your bathroom. You don't go downstairs, but you mention that you wash your laundry down there.

You let them watch a movie as you make some shrimp and bowl ramen. When you were done, you put everything on the a big tray and take it out to the living room. You set it down in front of them and you sit in front of the coffee table. In front of the couch they were sitting on.

“We can go shopping tomorrow for more clothes for you both. Sorry. I thought I was prepared but it seems i'm not.” You shy away, you pick up a piece of shrimp and bite the tail off.

“It's okay.” Jeongin smiles softly and picks up some chopsticks and eats some of the noodles.

It was like your mind stopped, you didn't know what to say or do. So you just finish your food and wait until they were done. You then got up and took care of everything.

“Um, you two may use the first bathroom I showed you. That's your guys bathroom. But until then, i'm sure you both aren't comfortable sleeping together, so until I can get another bed, one can take my bed and one can take the other.”  You smile. Jeongin was the first to jump up.

“I call your bed!” He smiles big, throwing his hand up. Hyunjin just rolls his eyes. You get up and hold both of your hands out. You hold their hands and walk to the first bedroom. You look up to Hyunjin and Jeongin.

“Goodnight, guys. I’ll be on the couch.” You say. You weren’t sure if you should hug them or what. So all you do is smile and bow you head slightly. You turn to walk, but Jeongin holds on tightly. You look back and see a confused look on his face.

“You aren't sleeping in your bed?” He asks confused. His words took you off guard. Did he expect you too...no. You knew hybrids loved skinship. So you knew that meant lots of cuddling. You could already see it now, him touching you and not liking what he feels.

“No, no. Plus I need to catch up on some reading. Go to sleep, the beds are really nice.” You say and slip your hands out. “Good night guys. Ill be out here if you need anything.” You say. You open the closet door as they disappeared into the rooms. They shut their doors at the same time. You sighed, as if you could finally breathe again. You grab a extra blanket and pillow and go to the couch. You laptop was on the kitchen counter, you grab it and continued to read the rest of a websites article. In the rest of the reading, you found out something you wished you found before getting them.

|| Hybrids are made with certain genes. Think of it as a recipe that can be changed. They have the basic DNA strands to be a functioning human with animal traits. Then every hybrid has a different combination of certain genes. Making each one unique.

They were made to become your lover, or your best friend. Even though hybrids are very observant, they can't read you mind. Depending on the hybrid you will need to tell them what type of relationship you want. Some, mainly in the canine and feline families, they will instantly want to love on you. You will need to set it straight to them. If you don't, their feelings will grow and grow, and if you don't feel the same. You will hurt them. So tell them before it's too late.||

Oh fuck.

You were suddenly scared. You wanted to go back a day and finish reading the article, then maybe you would have more time to think about it. But no, they are literally in the next rooms over. You sighed. Now that you think about it, you weren't sure what you wanted. And you knew that you needed to talk to them. But what if they just laugh in your face.

You knew the go to answer would be friendship, tell them you want friendship. But do you? Do you want something more? Maybe one can be one and one the other? Fuck. If you knew this information yesterday, maybe you wouldn't of gotten two. You took a deep breath. You needed sleep. So you did.

As the morning comes around, and as you start to wake up, you noticed just how freaking hot it was in your house. Did one of them turn the heat up? When your eyes opened you were met but a face, not even a inch from you. Your heart dropped to your stomach and you screamed pushing yourself away. But you didn't expect two hands to grab your waist, causing your body to not hit the floor, like you thought you would. The hands carefully pull you the rest of the way off the couch and onto the floor. You were confused until you looked and seen your coffee table on the other side of the room. You look back and see Hyunjin on the floor and Jeongin on the couch. They both had a worried face. The Hyunjin looked at Jeongin with a irritated look.

“I told you not to lay with her.” Hyunjin says shaking his head. But your mind wasn't focused on it. It was focused on the face that you almost crushed Hyunjin. You were so careless.

“Hyunjin. Are you okay?” You ask looking all over. Making sure he wasn't showing a sign of discomfort.

“Of course I am. I should be asking you that.”

“I'm sorry Noona.” Jeongin chirps in. That damn word.

“I almost crushed you, I didn't know you were there.” You say. You looked away, you felt your cheeks heating up. You wanted to jump in a big hole and never come out.

“Crushed? How can I be crushed,” He pauses and you felt his presence get closer to yous. “ by a cloud?” He says into your ear causing your body to freeze up.

“A-a cloud?” You stutter. Was that a compliment or should you be offended.

“MmHmm. A cloud that I could eat up.” He says with a low voice, right into your ear. Then his tongue sticks out and kitty licks at your ear making you jump. You backed away and you looked at him with confusion all over your face.

“You guys…” You mutter. You look at both of them and notice that both of their eyes were a lot lower than usual. It made their eyes looked a lot more fierce, a lot darker than before. Then you spoke before you could stop yourself. “I think friendship would be best.” You were too scared. Scared of them looking at you and hating what they see. You don't want them to feel like they have to like you, just because you adopted them. It would be different if they were human, then they would be you kids. But in the hybrid world it wasn't like that.

When you finally looked up, Hyunjin had his knees to his chest and he was frowning not looking at you. When you looked up he turned his body away from you. Your eyes looked up at Jeongin, and his face made you miserable. But when your eyes looked at him, his face turned still, and he looked away.

“I just don't think i'm good enough to be on that level of a relationship with you guys. This way, you both can go and find whoever when you are comfortable enough.” You shrug. You thought that would be best. You knew it. But you guess you were wrong. “I know I should’ve told you sooner.” You felt as if you fucked up.

“No, no, it's okay. I don't think we will be...um...finding anyone else anytime soon. But thanks for telling us.” Jeongin say, he tries to put a smile on his face. You knew you said the wrong thing.

You didn't know what to feel at the moment, so you tired something else.

“It's like, I have a choice on what hybrid I want, but you guys don't...you guys don't have a choice.” You try to reason. Hyunjin doesn't say anything, his back was to you still. This was just embarrassing. You were making a fool---.

“We don't see it that way. Plus, if we didn't like you, you would've known when we first met.”

“It isn’t our fault you have body problems, maybe you should’ve figured that out before fucking adopting us.” Hyunjin stands up and he leaves the living room. You hear the bedroom door slam. Your heart was beating out of control and you couldn't breath, you felt yourself panicking. You quickly got up and ran to your room, leaving Jeongin behind trying to call you back.

Jeongin was sitting on the couch for about ten minutes after you left. He had to think for a second. He knew you were quite shy from the beginning, he also knew he shouldn't of acted the way he he did. Jeongin and Hyungjin were quite close, being the only korean hybrids in the shelter. So Jeongin knew Hyunjin quite well. It was hard for Hyunjin to show his feelings. He’s been betrayed more than he’s been shown love, so he can only show his anger. He can't help it.

Jeongin gets up and walks towards the hallway. He stopped in his tracks when he sees Hyunjin leaning against your door. He was on the ground with his legs up to his chest.

“She's asleep, I'm going to apologize when she wakes up.” He mumbles when he hears Jeongin walking closer.

“Let’s go in. She doesn't think she's good enough to be with us, so we have to show her.” He says, he opens the door slowly and walks in. Hyunjin gets up and walks in behind Jeongin.

Hyunjin was scared. He wondered if you would want him anymore. He knew what he said was way out of line. He wish he could go back in time and re do the whole thing. He wouldn't of said anything, he wouldn't of even acted the way he did.

He was afraid that you would do something to hurt him like the family before. But now since this little incident happened between you two, he knew that you were the one he needed. As he looked down at you as you slept on your bed. He could tell that you were once crying before, your lashes were still wet. He felt himself get extremely depressed, his chest started to hurt a lot. His body let out a loud and sad cry. He climbed onto the side of the bed your back was facing and he melts his body into yours. When his body wrapped around yours, it really felt like he was at home. He also knew that it was going to be hard to just be friends with you, he was going to have to try to change your mind, or at least try.

“Jeongin, can you leave?” Hyunjin asks, but he doesn't take his eyes off of you.

“What?...” he asks him shocked.

“I just want to apologize alone, I’ll give you your time alone later.” Hyunjin whispers when you start to move a little. Jeongin just nods, he doesn't hide his sadness but he leaves.

Hyunjin was against your back, but he was afraid to touch you with his hands. His didn't want to disturb you, but his heart was beating way to fast for him not to do anything.

He was so happy that you got him, when he first seen you, you made his heart almost fall to his ass. He was scared, he didn't know what to do, he didn't even feel like this when he suppose family would visit. Suddenly he was pulled out of his thoughts when you turned over, facing him. His eyes were wide and he froze as you got comfortable again, you face a buried into his chest. He tried his best not to purr. His chest would start vibrating, causing you to wake up. He frowns his face trying to hate the feeling of his chest warming up, he tried to ignored the goosebumps raising on his skin from you breathing hitting his skin.

He looks down and notices your lips, and how soft they were. He looks at almost every freckle that was laying on your face. Your lashes made him swoon, he wanted to caress and kiss every part of your face. He couldn't help it anymore, his chest starts to rumble. He felt better and less tense now that he isn't holding back his purring. Just like he expected, with in a couple of seconds your eyes open and your body freezes up. Your eyes look up at him, and back to his chest. Your hands that were scrunching his shirt up. You quickly let go and start to move away.

“I’m sorry.” You mumble over and over, you were still kind of dazed from just waking up. Hyunjin grabs your wrist so you don't move too far away.

“It's okay, I think I already love being close to you.” He says smiling a little. Your eyes snapped to his lips and your cheeks instantly burned. “I'm happy. I'm really happy you brought me home with you. So I'm extremely sorry for what I said earlier. I was just upset.” His eyes were staring right into yours. His eyes made everything so much more intense.

“Upset? I didn't mean to make you upset.” You whispers softly. That wasn't your intention, but then again you never took their feelings in for consideration.

“Last night, Jeongin and I talked about this. Not many people know that Hybrid feel certain connections when they meet people, and both of us, our connection is so strong with you. We were excited for our future together, we even agreed not to get jealous of each other. But when you said you wanted friendship, it just really threw us off, it threw me off.” He says lowly. He scooches a little closer as he spoke, one of his hands were now caresses one of your cheeks, your eyes were stuck in his. His face was so serious, but his eyes showed so much.

“You-you wanted more?” You were shocked, have they seen you?

“We both do. You are just so damn…” His eyes trail down, making your face blush so hard. Then his eyes snap back to yours.

“But you can say no. It's all up to you.”

Your mind was going crazy. You were so confused at everything happening in your life. First no one wants you, now two do? It had to be to good to be real.

“Your purring is so loud” you couldn’t help but to say it. It was the thing that woke you up. That's when you noticed his ears again. They stood out against his dark hair, so you didn’t know how you didn’t notice. They went down slightly when you said what you did. His face started to turn slightly red and his eyes darted some place else other than you.

“I’m sorry. I can't really he-.” he started but you quickly stop him.  One of your hands shoot up to his chin and tilt his head back up.

“No, it’s cute. Doesn’t it mean you’re happy or something?” You ask in a lower voice. His eyes looked deep into yours making you feel shy once again.  

“Yea, something like that.” he says softly back. You didn’t know what to do or say to not make it as awkward as you envisioned it.

“When we met, you said I could touch your ears, and i know it might sound weird...but they are so pretty..” you were mumbling, you knew you were. You had troubles with thinking before speaking.

“Please touch them, you never have to ask.” he says in a low voice but quickly.

“Are you sure? I don’t wanna inva-.” he cuts you off by grabbing your hand and bringing them up to them. The first touch had your hand moving by itself. He was softer than he looked. you touched the darker tip of them. You were so mesmerized by them that you didn’t notice Hyunjin looking right at you,  mesmerized by your face.

You slowly moved your hand down, dragging your nails in multiple different ways. As you got closer to the base you noticed how his breathing picked up and his purring was more interrupted. Was the base the sweet point? You decided to switch back and forth from ear to ear, softly playing with them. It made him whine out that you were no longer going lower than just the tip.

His whine made your insides melt, you gave him what he wanted almost instantly and started to run and scratch the base, and it was like he jumped. He didn’t expect you to just suddenly go, and that caused him to move his head into your chest making you freeze up a little. After a second you moved a little to lay on your back and you brought both hands up to each hair and that cause him to huff out and lay on top of you, his head still buried into your chest.

His movements were sudden, and you didn’t know how to feel. You knew he could feel you under him and that made you blush like crazy. You continued to rub his ears so he didn’t notice your weirdness going on in your head. You tilted your head a little to try and look at his face. You couldn’t believe he was real.

Your heart started beating even faster in your chest when you see that his eyes were closed. Could he hear it? His lips were sticking out slightly and you suddenly really wanted to touch them. Did they feel as soft and cloud like as they looked?

Then it hits you again, he wants more than friendship, he wants you. This god like creature wanted you?

Fuck, that scared you, you hated getting close just for them to stab you in the back, and break your heart. You knew you pushed people away. But maybe they were different. But then again you always thought that.

“Hmm, I promise Jeongin and I will earn your trust. We won't hurt you, Noona.” He whispers the last word as you scratched a little harder on accident, he seemed to like, so you weren't too worried about hurting him.

That damn word. You didn't know why it made you feel special, it made little butterflies flutter all around in your stomach. The way it just slides off of their tongue…

You've noticed how fast your thoughts went dirty recently. It made you slightly uncomfortable, only because you couldn't help it. You didn't know if you hid it well, or it was in plain sight.

You felt his fingers dig into your side a little which made you freeze a little.

“I have to use the restroom.” You mumble, and pause your fingers and remove them from his hair. When he peels himself off of you, you shivered a little from the cool air that was around you. You didn't realize how much heat he was giving off. You quickly went into your bathroom and you shut your door behind yourself. You quickly use the bathroom, and you freshen up a little.

But you suddenly felt really weird. You met them all done up, and you were scared that when they see you...then you realized that the whole little moment you had with Hyunjin, you were exposed. No makeup, no perfect posture.                                                              

Fuck. Your mind starts spiraling outward.

Did he notice? Did he care? Why should you even care? You can't help the thoughts...did they take pity on you? Did they know about your past love life? Did they notice your insecurities?

You quickly got out not wanting to keep them waiting. You quickly got dressed for the day in some loose light blue jeans with a black leather belt. You grabbed a white turtleneck and a pale yellow tshirt to go over with, with the word ‘live’ written across the bust. Your hair was now curly so you just throw it up in a messy bun. You quickly do a little makeup to make yourself feel a little better and you leave out of your room.

You went into the living room, and the kitchen but couldn't find them. You went to their room you gave them and knocked on the door. Within a couple of seconds the door opens and Jeongin pops out. He looked as if he wanted to say something but he freezes and his eyes widen.

“Noona. How did you manage to look so good in such little time?” He asks looking at you up and down. Before you say anything the door behind you opens.

“I don't know what's better, this or the no makeup and PJ look.” Hyunjin voices comes out deep behind you. You felt your cheeks heat up almost instantly.

“Definitely this.” You laugh it off a little and your eyes snap down. You quickly clear your throat. And look back up and change the subject.

“So, I'm actually really unprepared for this.” You say sighing. “I didn't want to go to the shelter with a certain hybrid in mind, I hate getting my hopes up. So I wasn't sure if I should get fem, or masculine clothes. So that's what I am doing today. Buying you both clothes, because well I don't think you want to wear these sweats anymore.” You laugh a little. Your heart pounding in your chest.

You don't see, but Jeongin and Hyunjin looked from you to each other and smiled really big. They felt their heart start to beat faster, making their bodies get a little hotter and their tails start to flick.

“But I also didn't realize how intense your diets were, so I hav-”

“You don't have to follow that. In fact can we not? We are part human.” Hyunjin asks. He hated how strict the shelter was. He understood eating healthy was perfect training for a future lover, but damn. “Fish is nice though.” He licks his lips. You laugh a little when his eyes sparkle. You could tell he was trying to make you laugh. It was so cute.

“Do you like sushi?” You ask, it sure sounded good.

“You’ll let us have sushi?” Jeongin bursts out with wide eyes.

“Well yea why not?”

“We had it once. Well the cats did. But they found out everyone likes all kind of sushi. Good sushi isn’t cheap. So we never had it again.” Hyunjin laughs a little. You felt yourself feel hypnotized as he was explaining and he shakes his head almost naturally and his hair moves out of his eyes, and as soon as it did his eyes goes right to yours. His monolids making the stare so much more fierce. You couldn't help but to look somewhere else, making him sigh.

“Well, if you guys come with me, it would be much easier to get clothes, plus ill order sushi later.” You give them a small smile, trying to convince them.

“Why wouldn't we go with you?” Jeongin asks confused. You looked up at him and his looked almost surprised. “Is it the hybrid part? It's okay if you are used to it.”

“What? No, no. It's just your clothes now, and I don't know…” You didn't know what to say really. You couldn't say that you were embarrassed of yourself. What would people think what they see two beautiful men on either side of you, you this walking tragedy. You sighed.

“Lets go, so we can get this over with.” You say trying to look happy. You hated feeling like this. You should feel wonderful right now, but yet all these thoughts. You turned around to walk towards the front door where all of your jackets and winter were was in a closet.

You got two feet away when a pair of hands grab both of your arms and pull you into a hard chest. You looked down and almost instantly recognize the large soft hands as Jeongins.

“It's okay.” He says softly in you right ear. He lays his head into the right side of your neck from behind. His body was giving off waves of heat it felt like, it made your body turn to a puddle. But you weren’t sweating. Your cheeks were burning, where his arms were around your body, burned.

A good burn. A burn that you need.

Your heart almost gave out when Hyunjin came around in front and instantly brought his larger more manly looking hands around your waist lower and more towards your hips, his head in the left side of your neck. You were so confused right now. You weren’t sure what the sudden affection was for. You didn't know what to do, what to think. You were so tense and stiff.

            || As hybrids they have a couple more senses then the normal human five. They can't ‘feel’ emotions, but they can sense them. In fact certain emotions, they will feel as well. When the human is happy, they will feel happy and giddy. When the human is sad then the hybrid will feel a heavy presence on them. Each emotion has a different reaction depending on the human and the hybrid. ||

Later that night, the three of your sat around the coffee table with chopsticks in your hands eating away. A movie played on the screen in front of you and you felt content. Their closet was full of clothes that they picked out, and shoes aligned with it.

They said they didn't need two mattresses and would rather have more room and one bed.

You couldn't help but to keep thinking about what Hyunjin said earlier. You had been wanting to talk to them all day about this.

When the movie was done, you turned the tv off and cleared your throat catching their attention.

“Um… I wanted to talk, to clear things up. Ya know hear your opinion.” You say softly.

“Finally. I've been waiting for this talk Noona.” Jeongin says smiling and he shifts his body a little to face you.

“You have?” Your eyes widened a little.

“Yea. I've realized that you like things just out there, because your mind runs when you aren't sure. So i'm ready to tell you want I want from you and I want you to tell me what you want from me, from us.” His voice was soft and serious. You felt yourself freeze up a little with they both grab your hand. They were so soft and so welcoming.

“Well...uhm. What do you want from me? I'm up for anything.” You say the last part more softly. You keep trying to look at them in their face. But their gaze was too much for you. Your words were honest. You’d be will to try anything. But that doesn't mean you weren't scared. Fuck, your mind just kept going on and on. You keep picturing their faces twisted in disgust when they see what’s under the clothing. “At any point, if you don't like anything...Just tell me, I’ll back away. You won't hurt me. I just don't want you to hide anything-” You were startled when Hyunjin pulled his hand away from you. You eyes were glued on him and his eyes were stuck on you. He moved in front of the table and pulled it away from you and Jeongin.

You wanted to ask him what in the world he was doing. But Jeongin pulls himself onto his knees, his hands still in yours and he puts either knee on both side of your legs. Your eyes were crazy wide and you look up to his face as he looks down at you.

“Jeongin…” You whisper out. Your heart was beating so fast, your mind was fuzzy. His body sat upon yours. He looks so small right in front of you, so good and delicious looking.

His free hand comes up and touches your cheek. His hand was so warm.  

“I can almost sense it. Deep down…” His hand trails from your cheek down a little, around your neck slightly. “All of the men who hurt you, hid you away.” He mumbles. Your body was tingling slightly. The only thing on your mind was Jeongin. Both of his hands go down and grab your hands, he brings then up and makes you grab onto his waist.

“I know you want to…” he whispers into your ear. His mouth was grazing around it, letting his soft breath hit your skin. You felt goosebumps rise on every part of your skin. “Come on, push me down Noona...make me yours.” Your body was burning...your mind was blurry. Your hands were squeezing him, pulling him closer.

He was so beautiful and you couldn't tell him no. He wasn't making you feel useless, he made you feel like you were the one in control. He was yours.. He is yours…

You pushed him down with one thing on his mind. You switched positions with him, you now straddling his lap. You drag your hands up his body and around his face. He sits up a little from his lying position.

You brought his face closer to yours. His breathing was rugged. His eyes never left yours.

“Baby…” You mumble against his lips. His body reacted just how you thought, just how you hoped, just the way you always imagined someone under you. His body trembled a little and his mouth parts and a little airy whine comes out. It made you smirk just a little bit.

“B-baby...I like it. Call me it again.” He mumbles, you felt his hips move a little and that's when you noticed his lower area, hard. “Please.”  Your tongue sticks out and lick his bottom lip a little.

“Baby...you’re mine?” You ask, your hips start to rock against him a little to get him going a little more. The elbow he was leaning on, It looked like his arm gave out, the one that was supporting him.

“I'm yours. I'm definitely yours. We both are. Please kiss me...please.” He begs, he looks so fucked out, so good. You had to give it to him, he begged without being asked, it made you tingle down below.

Finally you leaned forward to kiss him, and when he seen that you were leaning in, he meets you halfway. He got impatient and later you’d have to tell him that that wasn't allowed, but you couldn't stop a moan from escaping your throat. Your hands went through his hair so perfectly, it was so soft, and light. Your fingers played with his ears, making him moan and groan underneath you.

You wanted to continue and go farther down but you were stopped from a little whine coming from next to you. Your lips left Jeongin’s and your eyes were met with slightly glowing ones. The way he was looking at you, this eyes were low and dark, except for the slight golden glow. You didn't know what to call him, his nickname for you. The key thing to trigger a perfect response. Was he even like Jeongin, would he confuse your moves as ‘cute’, instead of hot and sexy.

“Hyunnie…” The nickname fell from your lips, not really sure about the name. But he seemed to love it, he bites on his bottom lip a little to try and keep in his slight whine, but it came out to fast, it was muffled, but it was enough for you. “Do you feel left out?” You ask softly. You kept your eyes on him as you crawled off of Jeongin to sit on your knees a couple of feet away from Hyunjin.

He was sitting on his butt, his legs sprawled out in from of him. He bends them as if he was going to come over to you, but he hesitates. He eyes look over to Jeongin, who’s hair was all messy, and his cheeks were still slightly pink. Then he looks over to you again. You look at him in wonder, you wondered what will make him tick, make him stop overthinking and just do.

You understood that he wants to do something, but his nervousness was getting to him.

“Is it true Hyunnie? Are you mine?” You ask, you start to crawl to him a little. Right until you were right in front of him, but you don't touch him. You were still on your knees, so he had to look up at you a little.

You hoped he would hurry and do something so you could move from this position. Your knees were killing you.

When he nods his head, you smile a little.

“Then why the hesitation?” You ask.

“Because I'm not sure if you want to love on, or want to be loved on” He answered with no hesitation at all, which surprised you, but not as much as his actual answer did. Your heart was already racing but now…

“What do you want to do?” You whispered.

“Both.”

It was such a simple word, but it did so much to you. You raise a hand and grazed it against his jaw, luring him closer. Slowly, he gets into a kneeling position as well, his eyes glued to yours. He starts to lean down slowly, his eyes trail down to your lips. He locks his target and starts to close his eyes. He was moments away when there was a sudden knock at the door.

When your eyes left him and looked behind him at the door, his chest rumbles out with a growl.

“Shh,” You say caressing his face softly, wanting him to keep calm. His hand comes up over yours, and his eyes were on you again, he looked down at your lips. He started to lean in wanting to capture your lips finally. But you back away from him wanting to open the door. You smile at his little pout and get up.

You go to the door and open it up. You were surprised to see your old friend TaeYong at the door. As soon as you opened it, his smile hit you and his arms were open ready to take you into a hug.

“YN! I've missed you.” He whispers and enters your home. You were highly confused and you quickly shut your door.

TaeYong was a guy that was truly special to your heart. Years ago, he was once your best friend and he stole your heart. In fact he stole it and left the country for school. He never knew you loved him at one point. But that doesn't stop your shockness when he enters.

“You have hybrids?” He asks entering the living room and sees them sitting on the couch.

“I-uh, yes. Just recently. When did you come back?” You ask confused still. You reach up and try to fix your hair, in case it looked strange.

“A couple of days ago, I'm staying with my sister now. What are their names?” He asks practically hounding over them.

“Jeongin, and Hyunjin.” You say slowly, you watched as Tae reaches up to touch Hyunjins ears when he hisses at him making him jump back.

“Ohh, Hes feisty.” He says laughing a little.

“Uh, I don't think he likes strangers.” You say walking between them.

“Right right. Well my parents are throwing a party tomorrow. And you know them, finger sandwiches and tea. Make sure you were a skirt or something.” He says walking towards the door.

“Wait what?”

“Remember when my mother would just throw random themed parties? Well this one, girls are required to wear skirts and boys are to where some type of dress attire. Please come?” He says clasping his hands together.

“I, I have to talk to them first. But text me the address and we might show up.” You say smiling. You felt a hand grab yours pulling you gently, making you back up slightly. You could feel the tension thickening. You weren’t sure how they would react around others, and so far you were going to go crazy yourself

“Okay! I really hope you can come, it will be just like old times.” He smiles hugly and he leaves out of the door. As soon as the coast was clear, the hand that grabbed you, yanks you down and you land in Hyunjins lap. His face a twisted in a frown as he leans down and quickly captures your lips in his. Everything happened so fast, so it took a moment for you to process.  

Your head was in one of his hands and his other hand laid on your waist. His lips were soft and cloud like, they were warm and rushed against yours.

But just as quickly as he there, he pulls away, letting you slid off his lap and onto the floor, shook as fuck.

“I don't want to go tomorrow.” Jeongin says from behind you. You look up at him.

“You don't have to.” You say smiling and nodding, but he just frowns again.

“I don't want you to go either. I-I don't…” His frown soon goes away and his cheeks turn red. You felt on alert, confused to his change in emotion. You lean up, tilting your head a little.

“What’s wrong?” You ask. He sat on the couch, you were on your knees leaning into him. Hyunjin comes and lays his head down on Jeongins lap.

“I don't want us to go either. I don't like him.” Hyunjins words come out softly.

“It's okay, we won't. What will we do instead?” You ask, your hands come up and start to play in Hyunjins hair.

“I don't care, as long as you're there.” Jeongin says smiling. He grabs on of your hands lacing his fingers through yours. Hyunjin grabs your other hand, the one that was in his hair and laces his fingers through yours as well.  

You remember reading somewhere that a Hybrid won't get overly possessive and protective until you've mated with them, or in human language, have sex with them. When you do, it's like they claim your whole body as theirs. But that's the extreme, the more you do the more they love you and become attached. You made the slight mistake by kissing them. It wasn't a whole mistake because you loved kissing them already, it's just, if you knew it would change how they acted so much you would've waited.

The next day, you woke up before them. You told them to sleep in the other room just to be safe, you didn't know what would happen if they slept in the same bed after you kissed. You might’ve been overdoing it, but you didn't know how they would act.

You opened your bedroom door, only to let in two bodies. You could tell they were leaning against your door. When their bodies fell over, their eyes popped open and they looked at you. You squatted down to their level.

“What are you two doing?” You say smiling a little and looking between them. They were both looking at you so deeply. Jeongin was the first to speak up.

“It's hard to sleep in that room.” he smiles showing off his shiny braces. You reach up and smooth out his messy hair, causing him to lean into your touch.

“Only because you aren't in it.” Hyunjins soft voice follows, he grabs your other hand. It was so strange to you, as you looked between them both, their eyes never left yours, their smiles were stuck, even though they were sleeping on the floor outside of your room.

“How long were you out here for?” You ask worried that they were out here all night.

“Um, we sat here around 11.” Hyunjin says quiety, trying to think.

“I went to bed around 10, why didn't you just come in?” You ask smiling a little. You stood up and they followed right after making sure your hands was in theirs.

“We didn't want to make you uncomfortable.” Jeongin says squeezing your hand a little.

“It's okay. I would've let you sleep with me if it was hard to sleep.” You started to pull them down the hall and through the living room and into the kitchen. “What are you guys hungry for?” You ask them letting go of their hands and walking to the fridge.

You come to realize that you might have to cook two different meals every time you cook. Which made you already sigh in exhaustion, you needed to teach them how to cook. You weren't sure what to cook for their very first official breakfast. You looked back to them, watching as they were talking between each other. They were sitting across from each other leaving the middle spot open to you, the other spot taken by the table sitting right next the the wall.

It was like they could sense you, at the same time they turned their head and looked at you. You quickly looked away and tried to busy yourself, hopefully to get passed the fact that they caught you looking at them. Your heart raced as you opened the cabinet and took out two packs of ramen. You then got out two pots and one pan. You quickly started to bowl the ramen. In the pan, you cooked some shrimp first and prepared it to eat, then you took it out, cleaned the pan then put a little bit of chopped up beef and started to cook it.

“Wow, it looks so good!” Jeongin voice comes out from beside you. You jumped at his closeness, not even hearing him walk up. You look at him as he looked down at the food that was cooking, you looked over and seen Hyunjin standing on the other side. He was too looking down at the food like it was the best thing he has ever seen.

“Do you guys wanna help?” You ask taking the beef out. “Go grab whatever veggies you want.” You say pointing toward the freezer. You made sure to get pre cut veggies that could be frozen, it will help cut down the cooking time. When they did, you instructed them that they had their own pots and to put however much veggies they wanted, plus their protein. They after they were done, they put in their flavor packs.

As they did that, you got out some more pans and started to cook some rice and scrambled eggs. You seasoned it how you liked.

You told them to go sit down, but they insist on helping until you could sit down as well. So you told Hyunjin to get some bowls and cups. Then you told Jeongin to get the jug of water out of the fridge. You put everything in the bowls and poured the water.

After it was all done, you all sat down and began to eat.

After breakfast, you told them that you were going to go and get ready for the day and that they should too.

You were in your bedroom, looking through your clothes. You weren't sure what to wear, or what you were even going to do today. So you stood up and left your room. As soon as you opened your door to walk out, you didn't get really far. You were frozen in place. Hyunjin walks across from the second bathroom into their shared bathroom. He was towel drying his hair, as another towel hung from his hips. Your mouth went dry as you seen how his upper body was still slightly wet. He wasn't super muscular, but his body sure was carved from the Gods themselves. You couldn't help but to look down, as lines shaped into a v went down. You were hoping he would continue into his bedroom, so you could snap out of it and wait until he was dressed. You felt like your eyes were stuck. As soon as his body disappeared, his head popped back out.

“Are you okay? You seem a bit pale.” He asks stepping back out of his doorway. It's like you don't have control over your own eyes, you look down right away. You couldn't help but to bite your lip a little as you watch his arms as he puts the towel he was drying his hair with around his neck.

Your quickly look up and clear your throat.

“Um...uh...you took a shower so fast?” You ask, your voice cracks a little. You could feel your cheeks starting to burn. Jeongin steps out in some basketball shorts. You wanted to cover your eyes when you realized that he was shirtless too, the towel around his neck covered up a little.

He was so innocent and soft looking as he looked between the both of us with a big smile on his face.

“The cat part of him.” He laughs and pulls the towel off of his neck.

“Yea...I like to do what I have to and get out.” He says quietly, making you look at him. He was looking at your with such a dark stare, it made you feel funny inside. You felt a warmth hit you in the stomach and you weren't sure what it is...but as he stepped forward that spot twisted and turned. You wanted to run and hide, but you also wanted to stare and touch.

“I personally love showers!” He runs off into the bathroom. You wanted to call after him, he felt like a safe haven that you didn't want to leave. Jeongin was the literal light to Hunjin dark and dangerous vibes.

You couldn't handle yourself around either of them yet. With Jeongin you felt like you should be the one taking care of him, so that helps a little with your self control. You would do anything for him, and it's scared you a little because you've only had him for a short period of time. But with Hyunjin, you felt like your knees could give out at any moment. His eyes would look at you so intensely, and you weren't sure what he was thinking, you weren't sure what you could do, or say without ticking him off. You knew he supposedly liked you, but you were scared of saying one thing and he completely changing his mind about you. He felt, they felt too good to be true.

“Yn.” When his name leaves his lips, your eyes catch his. “Follow my finger.” He holds his hand up holding out one finger next to his head. You frowned a little but nodded anyways slightly confused. He then brings it in front his nose. You focus on his fingernail, looking back and forth between his eyes and finger. He then touched the tip of his nose and started to drag down. Your eyes quickly followed.

Your eyes widen a little when the pass over his lips. As he slows a little and just to taunt you dragging at his lips, making them pull down. Flashes of him kissing you days ago flash in your mind, making your want to run away.

His finger then falls to his chin and goes down his neck, it then goes passed his collarbone and down his chest...you refused to look any longer.

“I'm...I still have to take a shower.” You looked at the ground, fight or flight right? You were over trying to fight.

Your hand was almost to the door knob when his hand pulled you back, so it was out of your reach.

“Oh come on… why are you so afraid of me?” His voice was soft, and it had a slight whine towards the end. Your eyes were stuck on the floor too afraid to look up. You felt his hands grab yours holding it for a slight second, he brought your hand up. You think that maybe he was bringing it up to his cheek, something your realize he liked. But instead your felt skin, but hard. You were confused and looked at what he was doing. Your mouth went dry has he pushed your hand downward making your fingers run over the hard divots.

“Hyu-” He cuts you off by stepping forward with one big step and you were suddenly against the wall. Your head was to the side and he stuck his head into your neck. He made sure to keep your hands against his stomach.

“You are the cutest little thing.” He whispers into your neck, causing shivers to run down your spine. “I'm not even doing anything and yet you are almost red as a tomato.” His tongue sticks out, licking a strip up your neck. You gasped out, not expecting his warm muscle to be on you. Your hands shot up to his arms to push him away. If you weren't leaning against the wall, your knees would've buckled beneath you. It was the need to get away from future embarrassment keeping you up.

“I'm sorry. You just smell so good. I don't ever want to leave this spot.” He buries his face deeping into your neck, and he raises your arms to hook around his neck, then he pulls you in closer.

“Hyunjin-” Your voice came out as a whine, surprising not only yourself but Hyunjin as well. A little growl erupts through him and he starts to kiss all over your neck, getting more and more rough. His hands traveled up, making sure you couldn't get away, and he started to leaves marks all over your neck.

He felt drugged, but in a good way. He was floating on clouds and your scent invaded his nostrils. His hands were grabbing at every possible part he could. One of his hands soon went under your shirt and shooting straight up your back. His lips started to make their way towards yours. Your eyes were rolling to the back of your head and he was nibbling below your jaw bone.

“Fuuckk.” You moan out, the pleasure all shooting straight down. As soon as his ears were blessed with your sounds, his lips were on yours without anymore hesitation. You didn't waste any time kissing him back either. His hand clawed down your back and both of his hands met at your waist and he pulled you up, making your legs instinctively wrap around his waist.

You instantly pulled away wanting to be let back down.

“Shh…” He shushes you and he kisses you again. But this kiss was slightly different, he embraced you so deeply that you completely forgot that he was holding against the wall. Your stomach and mind was going extremely crazy, at the fact that you've always wanted to be held against the wall, and now he was. So effortlessly.

________

So like I risked it all posting this. Let me know if you liked what you read by reblogging and giving me your love. I love you!

[bigthighsandstupidguys]

Thank you to the lovely gems @satans-helper @mountainofthesunn @beautifulcinephile @safarimama @gretavanfic for tagging me! <3

1. What is your middle name?

Raquel

2. How old are you?

27, yes I’m ancient in Tumblr years haha

3. When is your birthday?

Feb. 23

4. What is your zodiac sign?

Pisces sun, Aries rising, Scorpio moon.

5. What is your favourite colour?

dark greenish blue, like dark teal I guess.

6. What’s your lucky number?

13

7. Do you have any pets?

My kitty cat Padmé....and there’s Obi, too, a younger, misbehaving kitty cat.

8. Where are you from?

Southern Arizona (it’s a dry heat!)

9. How tall are you?

5′1 1⁄4 “(you will pry that fourth of an inch from my cold, dead, hobbit sized hands!) also all y’all are tall af! What gives?

10. What shoe size are you?

7 or 7.5 depends on the style of shoe

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own?

A reasonable amount, I do believe in having shoes for every occasion.

12. What was your last dream about?

I was trying to pair a body suit with a skirt or something to attend a concert, but then a “race of superior humans” took over everything and well, the concert was no longer a priority.

13. What talents do you have?

I like to think I’m a pretty good dancer...

14. Are you psychic in any way?

I have a strong intuition, I think. 

15. Favourite song?

Today I am going to say Free Fallin’ by Tom Petty.

16. Favourite movie?

Probably Forrest Gump

17. Who would be your ideal partner?

Someone kind and funny. A good human being who’s just trying their best.

18. Do you want children?

I think so, but not for a long, long time.

19. Do you want a church wedding?

I got opinions about marriage as an institution...but if I gotta get married I think I’d want it to be somewhere outside.

20. Are you religious?

Not anymore

21. Have you ever been to the hospital?

Not admitted, just emergency room stuff

22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law?

lol no

23. Have you ever met any celebrities?

I met an actor from a kid’s soap opera in Mexico once idk his name tho. (and i swear to god I saw Travis Barker from Blink 182 at the San Diego Zoo once, could not confirm tho)

24. Baths or showers?

Showers (but Lush bath bombs are fun and fizzly and smell good)

25. What color socks are you wearing?

barefoot rn

26. Have you ever been famous?

no, but as a toddler my picture was used in a newspaper article lol

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity?

Not really, I just want to be able to wear gorgeous gowns and walk down a red carpet and pose haha. And also be interviewed, I pretend I’m interviewed a lot in my head.

28. What type of music do you like?

I listen to a little bit of everything in spanish and english, but mostly pop, rock, soft rock, oldies, r&b, hip hop. Like shoes, there is also a playlist for every occasion. 

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping?

NOT YET!

30. How many pillows do you sleep with?

four

31. What position do you usually sleep in?

on my tummy, arms under my head, making a four with my legs (if you know, you know)

32. How big is your house?

big enough

33. What do you typically have for breakfast?

an egg dish of some kind.

34. Have you ever fired a gun?

nerf gun lol

35. Have you ever tried archery?

No, but my middle school BF, Legolas Greenleaf, Prince of Mirkwood was really good at that.

36. Favorite clean word?

luscious

37. Favorite swear word?

Fuck

38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep?

24 hours i think

39. Do you have any scars?

Oh, ya...thanks Padmé

40. Have you ever had a secret admirer?

Not that I know of...

41. Are you a good liar?

Ha! No! My best friend says my voice gets two octaves higher when I’m lying haha

42. Are you a good judge of character?

I believe so, yes.

43. Can you do any other accents other than your own?

I mean, I’ve tried to do British, that’s what happens when you grow up watching LOTR, Harry Potter, and Pirates of the Caribbean over and over lol

44. Do you have a strong accent?

My Spanish and English are unaccented, but i’m sure when i travel to other parts of the country they know I’m “not from ‘round these parts.”

45. What is your favourite accent?

One time I heard a man from Holland speak and I’ve never heard an accent as beautiful since. But usually I like New Zealand accents.

46. What is your personality type?

Chill and funny.

47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing?

Probably my faux leather jacket

48. Can you curl your tongue?

Yes

49. Are you an innie or an outie?

innie

50. Left or right-handed?

right

51. Are you scared of spiders?

Fuck yeah, especially tarantulas. 

52. Favourite food?

Egg rolls

53. Favourite foreign food?

Chinese

54. Are you a clean or messy person?

My personal spaces are messy...there is order in the chaos, though.

55. Most used phrase?

“You guys are bad, bad kitties.” 

56. Most used word?

“Ubie” one of the many nicknames for my younger brother.

57. How long does it take for you to get ready?

about 30 minutes

58. Do you have much of an ego?

it exists and is a fickle thing

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops?

suck and then bite when it’s been weakened lol

60. Do you talk to yourself?

oh yeah

61. Do you sing to yourself?

mmhmm

62. Are you a good singer?

no, not really, but that ain’t gonna stop me

63. Biggest Fear?

living an inauthentic, unfulfilling life.

64. Are you a gossip?

I like to listen to tea being spilled, I just really like a good story. 

65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen?

The Prestige

66. Do you like long or short hair?

Long

67. Can you name all 50 states of America?

I think so

68. Favourite school subject?

History/English

69. Extrovert or Introvert?

introvert

70. Have you ever been scuba diving?

no

71. What makes you nervous?

being thrown into unfamiliar situations

72. Are you scared of the dark?

No (my best friend slept with a night light when we were growing up and it was the worst part of sleeping over, but I weaned her off of it eventually!)

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes?

Sure, kindly, the same way I’d like to be corrected.

74. Are you ticklish?

yes

75. Have you ever started a rumour?

no

76. Have you ever been in a position of authority?

yeah, at work. it’s weird, I do not feel like the kind of person who should be in a leadership position. I’ve always thought that was a thing for loud, confident people haha

77. Have you ever drank underage?

yeah

78. Have you ever done drugs?

like weed/edibles lol

79. Who was your first real crush?

Cody in fourth and fifth grade.

80. How many piercings do you have?

seven

81. Can you roll your R’s?

Yes

82. How fast can you type?

pretty fast

83. How fast can you run?

Like if I have a good reason to, my ass will sprint fast.

84. What colour is your hair?

It’s naturally a dark brown, but right now the roots are dark and the rest is lighter because i’m a dumbass who wanted rose gold hair 

85. What color is your eyes?

dark brown

86. What are you allergic to?

I think the combination of avocado and tomato causes some kind of reaction because every time I eat it, my lips feel all tingly and swollen.

87. Do you keep a journal?

I have a lot of journals that I occasionally will write in.

88. What do your parents do?

Their best. lol. My dad is a facilities director and my mom can’t work because of her chronic illnesses. But she was a teacher in Mexico, and worked at all kinds of things here before her health got too bad.

89. Do you like your age?

Sure

90. What makes you angry?

assholes lol people who don’t realize or care about the fact that we’re all on the same damn rock with the same needs. 

91. Do you like your own name?

I do, yes.

92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they?

haha I really like the name Agustín

93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child?

doesn’t matter

94. What are you strengths?

i’m compassionate and love deeply

95. What are your weaknesses?

i’m compassionate and love deeply lmao jk. It can be difficult to set boundaries

96. How did you get your name?

Named after both my grandmothers, they were quite different women and I think I got some of the best stuff from both.

97. Were your ancestors royalty?

Not likely, probably more like merchants. I’m convinced my mom’s side of the family left Spain because of some shaddy stuff haha or to incest in peace lmao

98. Do you have any scars?

Yeah, thanks Padmé

99. Colour of your bedspread?

It’s summer so i’m only using a flat sheet right now, it’s purple.

100. Colour of your room?

blue, specifically the shade azure

Tagging: @lazingonsunday @lantern-inthenight @gretavanfleetlife @littlegeekwonder @dreams-madeof-strawberrylemonade @eatmyshiftsticky @jeordinevankiszka @myownparadise96 @michaalien @mr-stank-i-dont-feel-so-dank @okietrish @thebatphone

[misfitsluug]

just listen to my voice | kritz

uhh this story is kinda old, so im sorry if it sucks; also kritz (kryoz nd fitz) is an underrated ship change my mind. i wanna upload more but im very slow with writing so im gonna upload an old story i wrote a while back lmao,,

anyways, hopefully it’s good! jus a reminder there’s some heavy subjects like, right off the bat so if your uncomfortable, then don’t read it! thank you, and have fun reading :•)

-

/ o n e. /

▕▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▏

cam.

The best way to start off the first night of summer vacation is when your Dad decides to kick you out of the house, again. "Fuck you, too," I muttered angrily to myself, kicking a rock that rolled onto the road beside me.

Usually, I don't come till he calls me, telling me about how pissed he is at me for staying out too late. I find it unfair, but I don't say much about it.

Anyway, I head down my favorite diner, my music blasting through my ears and my backpack slung around my left shoulder.

The night breeze hitting my face, the sky sprinkled with tiny stars while the lights from cars and stores passed by.

Once I finally approached the diner, I opened the door with a swing as the bell rang above me. I sat down at a booth next to the window, taking a peek through the menu in front of me.

"Hey, welcome to Nancy's finest wines and dines," The boy in front of me said, I took out one of my earbuds and smiled up at him.

He had blonde bleached hair with brown strips here and there with different moles scattered on his pale face; I took a glance at his name tag.

"Dahlia?" I asked, he chuckled awkwardly. "My name isn't actually Dahlia if your wondering, just covering a shift for a buddy. You can call me John," He replied, pausing as he looked down at the table. "Oh, uhm- you're looking through a kid's menu."

"Huh?" I looked down as well before realizing he was right. "Well, it's pretty late. Can't blame myself I guess."

"Alright, well, lemme fetch you a different menu. Unless you prefer your little kids' menu with crayons?"

"I'll keep the crayons," I grabbed the crayons and managed to make John laugh again. "Okay, I'll be right back."

I watched John walk behind the counter, reaching underneath to pull out a bigger menu and walking back to me. "Do you actually want something to eat?"

"Nah, in all honesty, I just wanted to order a coffee."

"Couldn't you have said that before?"

"Yeah but I'm an asshole like that," I stated, he rolled his eyes and smiled, leaving without a word. I had to admit though, he was pretty cute.

After a couple of minutes, he came back with a mug of coffee and a small bowl of coffee creamers. "Here ya go, uhm.."

"Cameron, Cam for short if you want."

"Here ya go, Cam," He restated, placing everything down before sitting down. "Since your my only customer tonight, tell me more about youself. I'm curious."

"So am I," I retorted, pouring creamer into the coffee.

"Ooh, very mysterious," He said intrigued.

"Maybe," I winked at him.

"Maybe?" He giggled, only making me laugh a bit too.

"You are beautiful," I muttered, slightly blown away at how this conversation is playing out.

"Really? I find that quite doubtful."

"Really? I find what you said quite doubtful," I repeated. "So, Dahlia-"

"It's John."

"What're you doing later?"

"Probably goin’ home, why?"

"Just wondering, gonna head down the train tracks tonight. A little adventure mind you," I explained, a small grin plastered on my face.

"Adventure?" John inquired. "Shouldn't you be going home? It's pretty late."

"Huh, never took you for goody-two-shoes. My dad kicked me out again and I ain't going back yet so might as well entertain myself," I added, taking a sip of my coffee.

"Hm, I'm interested, but what if I don't have any fun on your adventure?"

"That solely depends on you, doesn't it? Plus, I'm pretty good at having fun, maybe more than you if you're so worried about me staying out too late."

"Sounds like a challenge."

"If that's what you want it to be," I dared with a grin.

"Well, my shift ends in a couple of minutes. Mind waiting for a little?"

"I've got all the time in the world, honey," I reassured, John opened his mouth to say something but the man inside the kitchen coughed loudly, catching his attention as he stood up awkwardly.

"As you can see, I should be on my way. Before I go, do you not want anything else?"

"Nah, go ahead and do your job, Dahlia," I joked, John shot a non-threatening look while walking away. I smiled again, the hot rush of the coffee racing down my throat.

I popped my earbud back into my ear, spacing out with my coffee in my hands. After maybe, 20 minutes, I silently glanced behind me a while later, a pair of red doors opened and John walked out without his uniform. He wore a yellow, red and blue hoodie with white ripped jeans. "Hey, you ready?"

"Yeah, let's go," I replied, standing up from the table, turning off my music and putting my phone away inside my backpack, leaving the diner behind.

-

Silence filled the night air; the sound of leaves, sticks, and dirt crunching underneath us while walking through the forest. "Have you been here before?"

"No, I heard about there being abandoned apartments down nearby the train tracks, thought that I might as well check it out tonight," I answered, John nodded. "What about your backpack?"

"Eh, just full of spray paint."

"You know you could be arrested for that?"

"As long as I don't get caught."

"Good point," John answered. We chatted a bit more until finding the train tracks. "Finally, Jesus Christ."

"We still gotta walk more, you do realize that?"

"Yeah well, at least we found your dumbass train tracks," John grumbled.

"You know, you never told me why your Dad kicked you out. You don't gotta tell me but I'm just curious."

"He does that often, it's honestly a habit. He's technically my foster Dad," I continued, I chose not to go into detail. "I dunno, I love him but he can kiss my ass."

"Oh, sorry about that," John mumbled.

"Appreciate it," I answered, it wasn't anything uncomfortable for me to talk about. At some point, a building peered over the trees and as soon as we got closer, we were already there.

"Wow, it looks kinda beautiful."

"Yeah, it does," I agreed, stepping closer to the the apartments, admiring the art scribbled upon the grey walls as I opened up my backpack and pulled out my light pink spray paint, writing my signature (just the word Cam).

"Woah, can I try?" John asked, I nodded and he scrambled through my backpack, after a while, he finally pulled out a blue spray can. "You can do it, Dahlia!"

"Shut the fuck up, Cam," He sneered but I laughed in response, watching him try to write on the wall. "Here, lemme help you," I offered, I put my hand on his as I assisted him with the can, letting him write in his signature. "There you go, told you I'm obviously better at having more fun."

"I gotta admit, that was pretty sick."

"You sure you're up for this?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Because you said 'that was pretty sick' but I don't want you to end up getting sick," I teased, John fake-laughed in response.

"Whatever, douche," John insulted, painting more weird scribbles and I joined him. Our laughter was the only thing heard beside the sound of wind and crickets chirping. We painted all over the wall, covering other people's drawings in the process too.

John painted an extremely detailed penis, making the both of us laugh until a snap was heard in the distance.

"Cam?" John inquired, I was still laughing a bit before responding.

"Yeah? What's up?"

"Did you hear that?"

"Uhh, no. Why, what'd you hear?" I asked again, then a much harsher voice shouted.

"WHO'S THERE?!" It shouted, I knew that tone anywhere as I immediately grabbed John by his hand and my backpack, scurrying out as the policeman shouted at us.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck-" John repeated, his words laced with anxiety.

"We'll be fine, calm down," I spoke, still running until we lost the man in the forest.

We both took deep breaths, leaning against a tree. "I'm-I'm never going another adventure with you again."

"Trust me, you are," I raised my brow with a grin, he huffed and cupped his face. "Jesus fuck, that was terrifyingly delightful."

"Exactly why your gonna wanna go on another adventure one day."

"Fuck off," He spat, I felt a buzz run through my backpack as I grabbed my phone. "Hey, Dad," I sighed, rubbing my head. "Yeah, I'll get home soon- I know. No, I'm not with anybody. Okay, bye.," I hung up.

"What was that about?" John requested.

"Ah, just Dad yelling at me that I gotta go home," I spoke, looking down at my phone again. "It's 12:05 am."

"Oh fuck," John murmured, looking back at me anxiously, I could tell just by glancing at him that he wanted to leave. "C'mon, let's go," I began to walk again, John silently followed me as we reached the town. Almost nobody was outside, therefore most of the stores were completely off and the sound of two cars is heard in the silence; it felt like a ghost town.

We walked without saying a word, only appreciating our company until I broke the silence. "You know, out of the couple times I've gone to Nancy's, I've never seen you. Did you just start working there?"

"Yeah, Mom wanted me to get a job and that's the only place where they'd actually accept me, I guess," John answered. "Or at least, that's the only job that I applied for."

I laughed a little, my cheeks hurting from smiling.

Then we were silent again once we reached the small complex of apartments along the street, I could tell he's never been here before; we stopped in front of the entrance where a tall fence stood.

"Will I see you again? Back at the diner, I mean."

"Depends on when you want me there, honey," I said, winking at him as he silently smiled but I noticed the small tint of blush on his cheeks, however, I didn't mention it.

"Here, I have an idea," I remarked, pulling out a napkin and crayon from the diner. "Does it involve you giving me your number?"

"Yes it does, what I charmer I am. Right?" I said jokingly, handing him the napkin. "Whenever you wanna see me, when your shift is over or whatever, call me. Not like I'm busy."

"Hey, when your Dad called, why'd you tell him that you were alone?"

"Eh, just a habit. He assumes whenever I'm out with somebody, I end up doing drugs but I don't."

"Oh, well. I'll chat with you soon, Cam. Thanks for the adventure," John said as he stepped back.

"Au revoir," I spoke in French while bowing down fancily, listening to Johns giggle as he walked away.

I forgot the code to get inside the complex so I just hopped over the fence, my mind still thinking about John.

I just wish I hadn't gotten attached so quickly.

▕▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▁▏

1908 WORDS.

[lovenotesuggestions]

Write about yourself please hehehe i wanna know u 🥺❤️ ure so good at writing

Thank you, that’s so sweet 💖

Well, I’m a 21 year old nonbinary pal from the UK, and my name is Harry (tho I usually go by Fox online just bc that’s been my online nickname since I was like 12 on deviantart lmao). I just finished a Bachelor’s degree in English and Creative Writing (graduating with first class honours!!! aaaa!!!) and started my first full time job a week ago as of writing this. It was the first one I interviewed for and they liked me so much that they gave me a slightly different, better role than the one I originally applied for!!! Which I’m super stoked about. It’s not in the field I want to build my career in eventually (which is publishing!!) but I’m happy with it now as a way of earning a living and getting into the swing of real life after university without working ridiculous hours or having to bring my work home with me. I’m rly excited to have a structured routine and no homework and a pretty pleasant office environment bc I feel like it’s gonna be super good for my mental health. 

I’ve suffered with mental health issues for approx. the past 3 and a half years - namely depression, anxiety, and PTSD from an abusive ex relationship, but I’ve made a huge amount of progress in therapy over the last year and I’m doing Way better than I was when I started my degree.

This blog is one of my main hobbies, but my others are writing (predominantly poetry and short fanfic, tho I haven’t done it recreationally in a while) and video games (tho at the minute I mostly play the sims 4 because my laptop is Not designed for gaming and can’t run anything more powerful). I also really like getting tattoos, if you can call that a hobby??? I got my first one in November last year, and so far I have nine, and my list of ink that I want is like 20 things long lmao. I’m monolingual, but I downloaded Duolingo abt a month ago and started re-learning French, because I took it up until I was 16 at school and I really admire people who can speak multiple languages. I’m also super interested in activism and I’m always looking for ways to become more involved in advocating for underprivileged groups and important social issues. 

I’m a big Cat Person, and my partner and I have three cats. They’re all black shorthairs, and all siblings - Hubble and Pluto are 1 year old twin males, and Nova is their 3 month old baby sister (my sister owns their mama, so we adopted both the boys bc you can’t just have one when there’s a litter of two, and then when we heard they had little siblings we couldn’t not have one). They’re super silly and affectionate and playful and funny and I adore them, and all I ever wanna do is spoil them. 

I’ve been in a relationship with my current partner for almost exactly two and a half years now, and I’m convinced he’s my soulmate. We went to secondary school together and were close friends then best friends for years before we got together, and did that Dumb Gay Thing of secretly pining over each other for a long ass time before we finally got together. He p much saved me from my abusive ex by giving me the courage to leave that relationship before it could do any more harm to me, and he makes me feel so safe and loved and I enjoy being around him so much - it’s as easy as breathing. I’m so comfortable around him, he makes me laugh, we share a lot of the same interests and sense of humour, and he supports me so much through everything. We’ve lived together for coming up on two years now and I can’t imagine being without him. If people are interested, I’ll tell the story of how we got together (I might have told it before on this blog but it was a Long time ago)

Fun facts I guess??

I’m naturally ginger

I’m Short (5′1/155cm)

my fav animals are foxes

I have a giant family - I have 4 older half-siblings, two older like, half half siblings??? (not strictly related to me by blood but they have the same mum as my half siblings so they’re Part of The Family) and a total of 14 niblings. 

my fav colour is teal

I’m a scorpio???? idk shit about like moon and rising signs and at this point I’m too afraid to ask

I tend to use the label ‘queer’ for my sexuality, but more specifically I’m pansexual (tho I’m pretty neutral about using either bi or pan to describe myself) 

anyway, that’s me, ya boi, the person behind the sunflower 💖

[viktcrr-archive]

MAXENCE DANET FAUVEL / NONBINARY. — viktor samuels is really making a name for themselves as a tier 3 shepherd. i think that he/they are studying english + visual arts in their senior year at lockwood, living in peregrinis. originally from rochester, new york, viktor is known to be observant & ingenious, but can also be reticent & dependent. — james / 20 / est / she/they.

3/5 !!! once again ... little edits

TW DEATH, HEAVY GRIEF, OVERDOSE / DRUG ADDICTION, HOSPITALIZATION, HYPERSEXUALITY, RELIGION MENTIONS, MENTAL ILLNESS

a e s t h e t i c s

old tvs and their static, worn tapes, horror movie screams, spilled ink, a sculptor’s hands, clay-stained, chicken scratch handwriting, messy notes, messy hair, scoffs and eye-rolls, bruised knuckles, sore throats, funeral homes and a crying preacher, shattered ceramics, knife fights, high ledges, vertically-striped pants, red lights, the moon shrouded in clouds, cigarette butts.

general info !!

full name: viktor phillip samuels

nickname(s): icky vicky :/

b.o.d. - jan 2nd

label(s): the black hole, the crepehanger, the impious, the opaque, the tempest, etc.

height: 6′0″

hometown: rochester, new york

sexuality: uuuhhh god … probably pan tbh

pinterest

stats

biography !!

okay so … born and raised in rochester, new york to the well known samuels family. preacher father, a mother, a twin sister born 15 minutes before him - aka tatiana samuels, who died back in january.

kinda … grew up as a really awkward, quiet kid? like … just didn’t really interact with other kids super well, preferred being alone and like … digging up bugs in the dirt. only friend was like … his own sister.

grew out of this as they got older, instead sort of … becoming a bit of a dick? to compensate for years of awkwardness? will bite the hand that feeds him. was a full on nuisance by middle school. tatiana was not, at least, noticeably.

has always been a fan of darker materials, y’know - grim and creepy, morbid shit. big fan of tim burton ever since he was a kid, which isn’t … a good look for a preacher’s son, but he’s never really felt ~in~ with the rest of his family, anyway.

drew disturbing pictures as a kid probably tbh that prompted one or two or five phone calls home 2 assure everything was fine.

has always been really … good at art, in general - from drawing to painting to playing with clay, that’s always been viktor’s Thing.

aNyWaYs. being tatiana’s twin brother was kinda hard sometimes. tatiana and him were near opposites besides their same mean-spirited trait. she was better in the public than he was, but viktor was arguably more talented than tatiana. they both loved each other deeply and found each other as competition for their parents’ attention - a rivalry, of sorts.

high school is when viktor really started to act out - started extreme, like losing his virginity in their church and vandalism around the neighborhoods. faked being possessed in the middle of sunday service. almost had an exorcism performed on him, probably.

the only redeemable trait was like … his sheer talent with art. was in a 3d art AP course, specialized in sculpting - could pretty much create anything he wanted with enough dedication.

because his parents would be focused on disciplining him for his antics, tatiana could sneak away and get away with stuff easier. so like, y’know, that’s on the bright-side of things.

never been particularly motivated to do much - wasn’t planning on attending lockwood but his parents kinda … did and sent in his application for him b/c they were Not on board with him Wasting Away (wanted him out of the house asap)

actually pretty smart !! just doesn’t like … want to apply himself ever. double majoring in english and visual arts because they’re like … two of his only interests :/ plus he wants to write and illustrate his own series of children books with a style similar to tim burton’s

he’d been experimenting since high school but college is where he really started to like … crack down on himself and figure himself out. was out as pan & nonbinary by his sophomore year of college, just … not to his family, necessarily. thinks tatiana always knew, but didn’t … really use it against him, blessedly enough

always felt like the whole twin - connection thing was … both wack and also not-wack? sometimes it felt believable but sometimes he had no idea what was going on in tatiana’s head. but he felt oddly transparent to her, always - like he was predictable to no one but her.

( TW DEATH, GRIEF, OVERDOSE / HOSPITALIZATION BEYOND THIS POINT )

but when tatiana disappeared - it was like, like viktor knew. the moment she had been kidnapped - felt something deeply wrong in his gut. and when tatiana died - viktor felt something cut so severely in him. he knew, he always knew exactly when. he couldn’t put his finger on how - but he knew. even when everybody else held out hope for her to be found - he knew.

went on a bender around the same time, had always struggled w/ drug addiction but it got worse the longer tatiana went without being found.

( also struggled heavily with his mental health, too ?? has manic and depressive episodes. will fixate on a sculpting project for six months and then purposely knock it off the table and destroy it in the matter of seconds once it’s finished for. no fucking reason. impulse spends A Lot. )

when her body was found, viktor went off the rails. ended up overdosing and being hospitalized where he spent the next like … however long months … until they deemed him better.

stayed out of school until very recently b/c he just … didn’t want to go back. didn’t want to deal with it. didn’t want to be known as the dead girl’s twin. but then his mom kinda just was like ‘u go back 2 school or god so help me’ n he was like FINE.

so ya !! viktor’s back after being gone since tatiana’s body was found. that’s it, that’s him, a lil glimpse of his life.

trying to finish his senior year b/c he … obviously left before he could.

finding out that it was george who killed tatiana has ultimately ... caused viktor to spiral. his lows are some of his lowest, his highs are ... very high, but very bad. unstable & unpredictable in his actions it’s ... a whole thing :/

personality !!

the human embodiment of a gremlin, fed after midnight. a goblin, if u will. one of those cats with a narrow head and big ass ears. that’s him.

b i g horror & halloween enthusiast. loves the old campy horror movies. probably has an abundance of masks from different movies. dresses like a grimy millennial beetlejuice more than he should. love those vertically striped pants!

fashion alternates between e-boy (would b tik tok famous if he were like … 17), millennial beetlejuice, and like … goth in a crop top and sweatpants. big fan of crop tops. big fan of sweatpants.

he can be fucking mean. petty, aggressive, instigator. will literally spit in ur face or no reason. kind of person who’ll stick his gum into other ppl’s hair. other than that he’s like … pretty okay. he’s not always mean, he’s just a dick like … 70% of the time lmao

i mean yeah okay he’ll call someone a stinky bitch for no reason except He Feels Like It And Believes It. it’s fine he’s fine, we’re fine.

despite the fact tht he’s probably getting into fights whenever - considers himself 2 be a lover n not a fighter but that’s just because he Fucks a lot. kind of uses it like a coping mechanism, like he’s this big fancy carnival show that’s like ‘come one, come all! fuck the dead girl’s twin brother!’ may have a problem w/ hypersexuality but it’s nothing he’s fully. aware of.

the preacher’s whore son, basically

like i said he’s pan & nb, switches between he and they pronouns but like … he has such a fragile grip on his identity that u could call him ‘dog-faced bitch’ and he’d turn like hey wassup :)

vastly impulsive, like i’ve mentioned … destroys his own creations 4 the fun of it, spends all his money on useless shit, will cheat on someone bc he feels like it. screams into the night sky frequently, like a cat in heat.

i mean he also creates useless shit for no reason too. spent six months sculpting a hollowed out tree the size of him and then took a sledgehammer to it.

dramatic fuck. used to play the organ at the church like … when no one was looking after him and service was about to start. just these creepy as melodies. would do the same thing at home on his keyboard w/ the organ setting whenever he got grounded until his parents took away his keyboard sadjfkg

won’t talk about his time away b/c it’s not rly anybody’s business but ofc nothing is sacred to the watershed app, y’know, nothing’s private.

still like - he absolutely refuses to talk about tatiana’s death and like, his mental health or his addiction (he’s fallen back into it tbh but it hasn’t gotten bad again … yet) or like … anything involving his own emotions

will literally just change the topic! abruptly, no warning, asks about the jonas brothers instead.

that being said he’s obsessed with tatiana’s death. tatiana was very much a rock for him, kinda dependent on her in a way? just … being there, y’know, kept him grounded.

so he obv became a shepherd bc he wants to know Everything there is abt the app, wants to be deep inside it, wanted to know Who Exactly Killed Tatiana and like … not saying he wants 2 commit murder but :/ yknow. he’s very upset.

emotionally unavailable while also like crying twice a day.

will tell you straight up what he wants from you, no bullshit, no beating around the bush - just blunt. if he wants to just fuck, nothing else, then that’s that. if he feels deviation he’ll ghost in like. less than a second. kinda awful like that! feels no shame.

but like … also is emotional ?? as shit ?? it’s confusing. he’ll cry on a whim and then flip u off if u try to console him or like. ask him anything. will bite you.

he goes to therapy but he generally fucks around and wastes most of the time until the therapist threatens to like … idk what therapists r allowed to threaten. to send him off to another therapist? idk.

likes being intimidating but like … not with his body or nothing ‘cos he’s a TWIG, but like … uses his love for horror n creepy shit to his advantage. has an abundance of fake blood. has channeled the energy of jack nicholson and used it on tatiana’s boyfriends before.

( also a big fan of sfx makeup, has dabbled in it)

probably chases kids with a chainsaw (w/o the like … chain … or w/e … so it’s not actually Dangerous) around halloween

he’s generally never doing good, both mental health wise and morally.

would probably steal candy from a baby for the fun of it.

i don’t know if there’s a good to him, deep down, and i don’t know if he sees any issues with himself either !! nothing really breaks through to him anymore, the only person who ever really made him stop and Think about his actions was tatiana.

kinda introverted, recluse type who doesn’t rly like most people or going out, but he’ll go to parties if it means he’ll be high as shit.

pretty observant. likes to analyze people even though he’s probably not … fully right.

connections to the victims !!

tatiana samuels / his twin sister, other half - the only one able to control viktor.

george craig iii / close family friends ... they could appreciate each other, when viktor wasn’t being an outright asshole.

hana williams / ‘friends’ with benefits, their relationship was rocky at best but she was a good lay. have often fought due to their clash in personalities and viktor’s history with christoph.

christoph wainwright / an ex-hook up, an infrequent occasion whenever christoph wanted to tick off hana. viktor was often on board, never the one to consider others’ feelings.

wanted connections !!

he lives alone currently but like … ex - roommates where viktor was just. a nightmare to live with.

feel like a lot of enemies is also a possibility !! viktor’s messy.

people that like … knew tatiana. dated tatiana, even, and viktor would pretty much try to intimidate / scare them at any given chance :/

close friends of tatiana too

people who hated tatiana but liked viktor. people who hated viktor but liked tatiana

people who take pity on him and he Hates it viciously and vocally.

a band of hooligan gremlin kids who do drugs and fuck shit up around town like they’re edgy teenagers even though they’re all early to mid 20s.

the girl he lost his virginity 2 in high school lmao … a distant memory

fellow rochester locals, from church or school or whatever

exes from the past !! good terms and bad terms, but i love bad terms a whole lot mainly b/c viktor’s a jackass.

don’t know if he’s soft towards anybody but we can try. we can Try.

friends, old friends, new friends, bad friends, good friends, close friends, frenemies, etc. etc. all of it

hookups !! so many hookups. fwbs, one night stands, whatever.

uuhhhh god. i don’t know. im so sleepy rn. people in the same major or similar majors.

maybe a ride or die.

people he’s a bad influence on / an enabler towards / all around toxic for them / each other.

people he’s fought !! people who’ve seen him get into random fights and were like ‘uh wtf’

fellow shepherds !!

literally anything im not picky.

[sierrabinondo]

woodland creatures tour - day 8 (falls church)

finally got around to starting the final journal. life picks back up so quickly for me when i return from going anywhere, really, so it’s hard to stick to little projects like this. but i probably could have benefited from writing this sooner after the actual last day of tour haha. it’s funny how we only leave for a week or so but it feels like our lives shift so drastically during that time. it really does take time to snap back into reality and accept normalcy.

after a good night of bullshitting until super late (we tried to put on hot ones around 2:00 am but all passed out shortly after) we grabbed coffee and breakfast at coffeeology (i THINK that’s the name) in greensboro. we stopped at a shop literally across the street from the venue we played last year, new york pizza. seeing that place again reminded us of playing to literally our tourmates destination dimension and maybe like 3 other people in the room, versus the couple dozen we played to last night. the main band that played the gig that night literally sat outside the entire show with their friends and only came inside for when they had to play. it was disheartening, to say the least. this time, we didn’t play to a crowd that was there for us, but we played to so many more people who actually stayed inside to watch us. 

i wish i could remember this drive, i didn’t have any work to do so i think this was the day i bought untitled goose game and i was playing it a little bit haha. we listened to some music and just enjoyed the trek to our last gig on this run. of course, we started to hit traffic as we approached falls church, which is in the DC area for anyone not familiar. however, we were still making okay time. we could make a detour to drop our bags at the hotel in vienna, get food, and then run our dual band cover of uneasy hearts with pulses. forgot to mention this in the jacksonville journal lmao, i approached kevin with this idea for the last show of tour super casually and we did end up deciding as a whole to go through with it! 

the hotel in vienna was such a strange spot, but it was kind of cool? we stayed at the vienna wolf trap hotel hahaha. all of the decor was SO DATED but it was still pretty okay. the guy at the desk was nice, we somehow got on the topic that we were a band on tour rand he gave us late check-in for free! ended up not needing it. but it’s the thought that counts haha. we arrive to the venue and jaime’s girlfriend rebecca is there to greet us :’) poor girl drove their RV all the way down to virginia alone, and that thing drives slowly. but then that meant jaime could ride back up to jersey with her which was good. 

it is insane how at home we feel at falls church. i guess everyone south of maryland is just way fucking cooler than the northeast lmao, but it’s like pulling up to play somewhere at home in jersey and running into old friends. i can’t get over that we have that in a state hundreds of miles from home. it was good to see familiar faces and be back at the vfw. our friends’ band to michigan, with love was also on the gig, and our newer friends in science penguin joined us on the show as well! it was an all-around homie fest. i rolled up to the venue with the remainder of the trulys i purchased the night before, and shoved the box in the fridge haha. i was ready to just chillll. 

because we have played here a handful of times, it is also now tradition to walk across the parking lot and go get korean fried chicken at the restaurant next door. it fucking sucks, we always arrive just in time to eat before doors and i normally can’t eat jack shit because of fried/spicy food being horrible for my voice. i ordered bibimbap and then 12 wings to go, for after the show lmao. or a snack after we play!! but i ended up forgetting to FUCKING eat them AND they just sat out overnight in the van so they were toast. goddamnit. i think the restaurant is literally just called bbq fried chicken, the way they fry their chicken is just perfect. the sauces are all delicious and everything besides that on the menu is also tasty. 

i wanted so badly to break my last set of tour curse. it’s definitely a self-imposed, silly, superstitious thing, but my last set of tour iS ALWAYS HOT GARBAGE. i always for sure mess up. and this was probably the best last set of tour i’ve had but still not my best performance all of tour haha. i got lost the bridge of murder mountain and couldn’t hear my bandmates for some reason? fucking embarrassing but!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cannot stress enough how much fun it was. it truly was. fucking, we’re about to play pixelated and i’m trying to give my SHPIEL about not being a JERK musician and i hear the sounds of “smooth” by carlos santana featuring rob thomas faintly playing through my in-ears. i rip them off and i’m like, what the fuck is going on LMAO. surprise, the pulses. gang were behind it, and tyler, taylor and kevin come dancing up to the stage. i was DEAD. we never do last day of tour pranks so we were fuuuully unprepared hahaha. it was so funny. my meme now takes on a whole new meaning!! 

most importantly this show felt like such a fun celebration of tour. pulses., as they did all tour, hyped us up during almost every song and went off for synapse fires. we are too fucking lucky to have them as friends. they really helped make every set and every show feel worth the hours of travel and sometimes stress. to look out and see their faces in the crowd and singing the words uplifted us each night. it’s unfair that we live so far apart. it’s like how they say your soulmate could be literally anywhere in the world but you won’t know until you go look??? it’s like that but with finding supportive friends. i’m not sure if we’ve stressed this enough but this tour gave us strength to keep going as musicians, due in part to their friendship. we always joked like how the fuck we’re supposed to just go on not playing shows together or seeing each other all the time but it really does suck lmao. i was in my feelings in both a good and bad way, soooo i immediately scurried off the stage to go grab a truly the second we were done HAHA

it’s always so sad to watch your friends play their last set of tour, too. well moreso bittersweet! but you know that it’ll be your last time seeing them play for a while. i enjoyed every single minute. i love watching them play hometown shows, too. halfway through we jumped on stage to do the uneasy hearts cover, completely unrehearsed, and i’d say we did a pretty damn good job. such a fun way to send off the woodland creatures tour. i had always wanted to do something like this, where two bands play on stage at once (holla me versus i nd the artwork of). the energy the whole song was so infectious, it was fun to see people in the crowd go off too. also, fucking KRIS KHUNACHAK shot this video with TWO ANGLES holding both his cameras at the same time. i still can’t get over that.

i love that pulses. played you already know as their closer, it was the perfect way to wrap up their set and the best bookend to the setlist they chose. kevin would get on the mic every night and speak to the crowd, dude is just really good at being a performer and resonating with people. in jacksonville he sat down and everyone followed his lead haha. it was fun to dance one last time with everyone as we watched pulses. kill it before the tour came to an official end. we then gathered outside to take group pictures. it’s the part you don’t wanna get to, because it signals farewells in the near future, but we took some really great ones. 

post-gig taco bell plans were foiled, but someone recommended the silver dollar diner nearby. diners outside of jersey are normally horrifying but i trusted the people we were with. we piled back in our vehicles and rolled 20 heads deep to the diner. it was actually a really sick diner with tons of vegan dishes and pretty tasty food. i got chicken noodle soup, red wine and an ice cream sundae because i am a freak of nature. we ate up like 3 tables and sat altogether, just bitching about having to return to real life the following monday. but also, trying to plan the next time we would see each other. already!! and!! talking about doing more shows together. we try to work with different people all the time but there are a select few bands we would tour with or gig with again and again and again and pulses. are one of them. after how much fun this run was it’s pretty hard to imagine not doing this again. it just... makes sense. so much sense. and it feels wrong to not do it again lmao.  

goodbyes were bittersweet. we huddled in the parking lot by our van to say goodnight and see ya later, one by one. fuckin, tyler is moving to nashville very soon so we all probably won’t see him for a hot minute :’----------( thankfully everyone else really isn’t that far if we planned a weekend trip to meet halfway or if we wanted to make the trip out to each other, thank god!!! i don’t know what i would do if i couldn’t always have a part of this tour with me, somehow or some way.

afterword

was thinking of adding a lengthy epilogue but it’s essentially just me openly sobbing in the van the entire ride home hahaha. you’d think that every single time it would get easier to come home but it doesn’t. i know why touring impacts me as much as it does emotionally, but when the bittersweet acceptance of coming home pours over into tears like it does, i feel kinda silly. i’m sure that there are musicians who are constantly gigging that would love nothing more than to be home more, and i know that if i was in their shoes i would come to dread touring, too. 

i really, truly wish i was in a place, or that my bandmates and i, were in a place to tour more often, but for now we have what we have. and that’s okay. i want to share something beautiful our friend charlene posted today that deeply moved me: 

This is the moment. I’ve made it.

People always ask me “what are you gonna do when you’ve made it?” I need you to understand something; I’ve already made it. I am living out my dreams. It’s not easy and obviously I would only hope that’s I will continue to grow, to reach bigger goals, to push the limits. But I’ve already made it. This is the moment. I won’t let myself miss out on the beauty of life that’s right in front of me because I’m too worried about something that may or may not come tomorrow. This is the moment.

[intothedanvers-e]

Unspoken

Word Count: 1.9k Pairing: Peter Parker x reader (Boy Meets World AU) Summary: You’ve known Peter Parker since you were kids. You’ve gone through elementary school and middle school with him and his attached-at-the-hip best friend Ned Leeds. You and Peter always had an unspoken chemistry, you’d always considered him one of your best friends; but why did starting high school make you feel like there was something more there? Something the two of you felt like you couldn’t say out loud out of fear of shattering your friendship? Author’s Note: I KEEP FORGETTING TO ADD AN AUTHORS NOTE LMAO SORRY I JUST BEEN REAL BUSY!! if u like it or would want to part of the taglist let me know!! :)) <3 Here’s my masterlist! Prologue Part 1 Prologue Part 3 Chapter 1

Prologue Part 2

You came back from your writing camp two weeks earlier than you had last year. You and your dad had agreed that this time he’d let you have at least a fraction of your summer to hang out with your friends. You were equal parts nervous and excited, before you left for camp Peter and Liz broke up and they didn’t end on the best terms. Peter kept yelling about how everything was moving too fast and he was too young to be tied down, but Liz told essentially the whole school that she never really liked him that much. You wanted to stay and comfort Peter but you were actually kind of looking forward to camp this year considering you weren’t going to be put in the “kids” section.

Your bus pulled into the parking lot and you could already see your dad standing next to Peter and Ned on their bikes. There was a third person there you couldn’t really recognize. You got off the bus, grabbed your duffel bag and ran to hug your dad.

“I missed ya big man!”

“I missed you too,” he said putting your bag into the trunk of the car. You walked over to Ned and hugged him. You pulled Peter into the hug as well.

“I missed you dorks.”

Your dad walked over and gave you a quick kiss on the cheek.

“I’ll take your stuff home and leave it in your room. Don’t stay out to late and if you’re not coming home for dinner, call me okay? Love you.”

“Love you!” you said as your dad drove out of the parking lot.

“Y/N, this is Michelle.”

She finally stepped forward and smiled at you.

“My friends call me MJ.”

“Nice to meet you! I’m Y/N.”

“Yeah your nerds wouldn’t stop talking about you all summer.”

“I hope it was all good things.”

“I don’t think they’d be physically able to,” she said laughing.

“There’s nothing bad to say!” Peter said a little too quickly.

You all giggled and you tried to change the subject as you climbed onto your bike.

“So where are we headed?”

“There’s a carnival going on around my house, my cousin is working the ticket booth so she could sneak us some tickets,” MJ said shrugging.

“I love her already! We’ll follow you.”

“This guy already knows the way, we should probably follow him since he says his ‘shortcuts’ cut the time in half,” she said pointing to Peter.

“It’s also a lot safer since we’re not on busy streets!”

You bit the inside of your lip. You liked MJ, you really did but you could tell there was something more going on between them than they were willing to admit. You thought back to the letters sitting in your box in your closet. Would they have changed anything? Could that have possibly been you if you would’ve just given them to him? “Y/N?” Peter said tapping your shoulder.

“Huh? Sorry I was just thinking about whether I left anything at camp, don’t know why I suddenly got really worried,” you said trying to let out a genuine giggle.

“C’mon, I’ll lead the way.”

“Gotcha.”

You all rode together for about 20 minutes and finally reached the carnival. MJ had managed to get a lot more tickets than the four of you suspected. After a few hours of going on all the rides at least twice, Ned and Peter went off to play one of the carnival games which gave you and MJ some alone time. You sat at a picnic table not too far from them.

“So what’s the deal with Peter?”

“What do you mean?” you said smiling and trying to hide the fact that your hands went almost instantly clammy.

“I’ll be honest with you because I like you Y/N, I like him. Like, like like him. But he wouldn’t shut up about you all summer so I totally get if you already called dibs on that. Just let me know so I know what to do.”

You turned to look at Peter who looked like he was having the time of his life playing the ring toss with Ned. You wanted nothing more than to walk up to him and just kiss him and hug him.

“No Peter’s just my best friend. He’s an amazing guy and I can already kind of tell there’s something there between you two so I say go for it girl.”

“Thank you thank you thank you,” she said pulling you into a hug.

Peter and Ned walked over to you guys. Peter placed a little teddy bear in front of you.

“For you,” he said smiling.

“Uh actually you should give it to MJ since she’s the reason we had tickets to even be here,” you said sliding it back to him as he sat across from you.

He gave you a confused look.

“Okay! Here you go MJ, thank you for hooking us up.”

MJ took the teddy bear and smiled at you, you tried your best to reciprocate it. “I’m gonna head home guys! Sitting on a bus for hours can really wear you down so I’m gonna catch up on some sleep.”

“Already?” Peter said standing all of a sudden.

“Yeah but please don’t let me stop you. I’m just sleepy and don’t want to make any of you deal with that ya know?”

“Y/N when she’s sleepy is probably the worst,” Ned whispered to MJ.

You pushed his arm and laughed.

“Stop scaring her please, I actually like her and I finally wont be the only girl!”

You hugged all three of them.

“I’ll call you as soon as I get home okay?” Peter whispered into your ear.

You smiled and nodded, before taking off on your bike. You got home quickly, your dad was sitting in the living room watching TV.

“There she is! Did you guys have fun? What did you guys do?”

“We went to a carnival! MJ has a cousin that snuck us some tickets and we got to go on everything like twice. She’s so cool.”

“You didn’t go have dinner at the Parkers?”

You shook your head quickly.

“Just want to unpack and take an actual warm shower for the first time all summer. Maybe sleep early.”

“Okay, goodnight honey. I got work tomorrow so I’m off to sleep too.”

“On a Saturday?”

“Yeah Mr.Delmar wants to promote me to manager so I’ve been picking up shifts to train.”

“Yay! That’s good right?”

“Of course sweetheart. I’m off to bed. Goodnight. I love you,” he said placing a kiss at the top of your head.

You went into your room and started unpacking things and putting them in their designated piles. After a while your room was fully clean and you were pulling out another small box of papers from your duffel bag. You took your box out and unlocked it, but froze as soon as you heard what sounded like your front door open and close. You jumped up and grabbed your bat, turning off the light in your room. You quietly opened the door and walked into the hallway. You walked through your kitchen and stood at the entrance of your living room which was connected to your front door. You creeped toward the window double checking to see if it was locked. You slowly walked to the door, noticing that the locks you were 100% sure you locked after coming home where unlocked.

“Y/N?” a voice said from behind you.

Without thinking you swung the bat behind you, just barely missing the guy in front of you.

“Woah!”

You swung again. He was wearing what looked like a spandex suit but didn’t get to look at it too closely because he jumped onto your ceiling.

“What the fuck?!”

He quickly pulled his mask off and signaled you to keep quiet. It was Peter.

“WHAT THE FUCK?!”

“Y/N let me explain!”

“Everything okay?” you heard your dad yell from his room.

Peter’s eyes widened as he kept signaling you to be quiet.

“Yeah just a freaky looking bug flying around but I killed it.”

“That’s my girl. Go to sleep Y/N.”

“Okay dad! Love you!”

Peter got back onto the floor and took the bat from you.

“Peter what the FUCK is this?” you said quietly.

“Can we go into your room so I can explain this to you?”

You nodded and followed him as he quietly walked to your room. About an hour later you sat on your bed in disbelief. Little tiny nerdy Peter Parker who you’d known your whole life, was now basically a superhuman?

“And Tony Stark made you that suit?”

“Yeah, he’s like my mentor you know?”

You nodded your head but didn’t say anything.

“Y/N I need you to believe me.”

“Oh I believe you. There’s no way you’d get six pack abs other than a radioactive spider biting you.”

“Okay fuck off.”

“Okay but what were you doing at my house?”

“There’d been a few robberies in the area recently. While you were gone I’d come and patrol the building just to make sure your dad was safe. I thought you’d be asleep so I just wanted to see if you were okay since you left really quickly today.”

“Yeah that’s not creepy at all,” you said laughing.

“Also I wanted to talk to you about something.”

You sat up, already sensing a difference in his body language.

“What?”

“MJ tried to kiss me tonight.”

You bit the inside of your lip, it really was your worst habit.

“Nice!”

“What?”

“Yeah she told me she liked you and I told her to go for it. Boy did she go for it, I like her.”

He looked at you confused.

“You told her to go for it?”

“Yeah of course! She’s great, the two of you get along, both Ned and I actually like her, and she seems like a nerd. What’s not to love?”

“And you’re okay with this?”

“Why do you ask me that every time you like a girl Peter? I’m not supposed to approve them or something. If you like them, you like them. It has nothing to do with me.”

“I guess I just keep checking to see if your answer will ever change.”

You started fumbling with your nails, you didn’t want to look at him.

“Well I say you go for it. You guys seem to have already spent a lot of time together this summer so might as well see if something comes out of it.”

He nodded his head and stood up to go. He caught a glance of the box you kept hidden away from everyone and the letters that sat inside them. You panicked and closed the box.

“They’re from a guy at camp. He was sweet, but it was just a summer thing because he’s from California,” you said locking the box.

“Oh that sucks. Would’ve loved to meet him.”

“Yeah you’d like him. Cool guy.”

“Alright well I’m heading home. Thanks for the advice I guess. And please don’t tell MJ about this, I don’t want to overwhelm her already.”

“My lips are sealed,” you said as he opened your window.

“Why does it always seem like we can never get moments together, just the two of us?”

“If it’s meant to be, it’ll happen. You can’t force it,” you said shrugging.

He smiled before putting on the mask and leaping out of your window. You shut the window and immediately hid your box away in your hidden spot. You went to bed wondering if things would’ve been different had you said all that you felt to him. You shook your head; you knew it was probably for the better this way.

Taglist: @tom-hollands-eyelash @colourful-fandoms-ruined-my-blog @hollandlovely @serpent-tea @lemirabitur @tomsspideysenses @spideycentral-1 @kalteneckr @skelkitt @jujurandy 

[hitchcock-eastern-hemisphere]

Tuesday 9.21.21

I feel like it's been a week since I got here. I've walked probably 20 miles in the last three days. Let's see where to start.

Sunday morning I went to Costa's for coffee and breakfast, apparently it's a big coffee chain here. Around lunch time, I went to meet a friend K (I will shorten all names for confidentiality) from my cohort on LSE campus. I'd never been on it before!

We immediately left and walked across the bridge to Southwark (pronounced Suthark, apparently). It was drizzling and everything was pretty grey, it felt pretty enchanting in a dreary London kind of way. The whole south bank of the river around there is super built up, it feels like the Yards or the Wharf in DC near where I'm from.

We eventually ended up at Ristorante Olivelli for lunch, we both really felt like having pasta for some reason. It was a cute restaurant. We meandered around Vauxhall and then crossed the river again toward Pimlico, and we walked by Big Ben (I hope my gold production is now increased by 25% [hah, Civ 5 reference]) and Westminster Abbey. Big Ben was mostly blocked by scaffolding. Eventually, I split off and took the train back up to Tufnell Park. For dinner, I ate granola out of a whisky tumbler with a fork, so that's the type of life I'm pursuing now.

On Monday, I went to meet my friend N from the cohort at LSE campus. He had literally just arrived from NYC, and couldn't check into his hotel until later. We walked around LSE campus a bit more, and both bought some LSE clothing/etc at the school store. It's funny, a lot of the buildings are quite modern, but the way they're all tucked in together, it still feels kind of like a medieval street. Lots of cobblestone-ish roads, no real quad like I'm so used to at UChicago or Columbia (though I only spent a couple months at the latter, and I always found that campus to be not terribly welcoming).

I wanted to go to the bookstore Hatchards in Picadilly, which I thought would be a 15 minute walk. Instead, I dragged my friend on a like 40-minute march (keep in mind, this man just got off a red-eye flight to a country five timezones away from home). We made it, and I bought two books that looked related to my dissertation subject.

We were supposed to do a lot of work on that this summer and I did none, because I needed a five month break from that truly exhausting nine-month slog of virtual class and quarantine isolation. Anyway, we chilled at a Caffe Nero nearby for a while, then I left and bought a tennis racket+balls and a basketball at Lillywhites nearby. Yesterday afternoon, I bought some plants. I'll be filling my apartment with as many as possible while I'm here. Pictures soon.

Yesterday evening, I wanted to try this Ethiopiean restaurant Lalibela on Fortress Rd nearby, but I stood outside for like 20 minutes after their supposed opening time of 6, and they never flipped the closed sign to open. I also realized I was slightly under-dressed wearing only a tank top and shorts. So I walked across the street and ordered from Blue Moon Thai instead. While I was waiting, I went over to Sainsburys to buy a few things, and I think the security guard thought I was a suspicious loiterer because he followed me around most of the time I was in there.

I forget what else I did yesterday, but I went to sleep at 10-ish and actually slept through the whole night!! Which is a big deal, because the first night I woke up at 1 am and fell asleep again like an hour later. And then Monday night I woke up at 2ish and proceeded to text one of my friend, L, until like 3:45 am.

This morning, I walked over to Rustique Cafe, on Fortress Rd right near all the other things on Fortress Rd that I talk about. Inside, they have a bunch of bookshelves and all the books are for sale. And you can walk out the back and sit in a wonderful garden they have.

I also saw a cute cat walking around outside my building.

I got a cappuccino (UK cappuccinos always seem to be like 12-16oz, a traditional capp is supposed to be 8 lmao). Also, it has just become apparent to me that tumblr or Firefox spell-check does not recognize cappuccino as a word. It's 2021, boys.

Today, I might my friend K came up to Tufnell park because she was thinking about trying to get a room in my building. We walked to Workman's Cafe (where I went the first day I was here) and got lunch, which was cute. I like the vibe. When we were paying at the counter, I asked the guy if I could tip them and he stared at me for like 10 seconds. Apparently, tipping isn't really a thing here. Also, I'd been wanting to get a picture of the train tracks from the bridge near my apartment for a few days. Got it today. It makes me think of Persona.

We then walked all the way down Fortress Rd, which eventually becomes Kentish Town Road, to Camden. My best description of Camden is that it's basically like the Greenwich Village of London, with some Times Square elements on a couple blocks. Parts of it were really cool, other parts were cheapo London/Britain knick-knacks shops that looked like they belonged in wherever the equivalent of Midtown NYC is in London. We walked by this cool lock on the way.

We went to an anime store!!! that she found called Japan Craft. Manga shelves took up like half the store, and they had some posters, t-shirts, and figurines as well. And for some reason, some Harry Potter merchandise? Anyway, I didn't buy anything, but that's probably the best manga selection I've ever seen short of Kinokuni-ya in NYC, so I want to go back. And somehow, I forgot to take any pictures.

Afterwards, we walked over to this Italian Cafe to get coffee, and instead got a Rosé (K) and Peroni (me). I also had a Portuguese custard pastry. I'm too tired to remember the name of this cafe, but it was cute. We toured another apartment she's looking at near there, then I walked all the way back up to my apartment.

And immediately got changed and got on the tube back down south to LSE campus again, to meet my friend C who flew in yesterday! After a brief tour of LSE campus, I led her too on a long and partly unguided walk through Picadilly and Soho, and we eventually landed at Kissaten bubble tea shop right near Chinatown. I definitely got us lost because I wasn't looking at the map, which she was not thrilled about lol. The bubble tea was good and there were so many super flashily dressed people there. But they only had caffeinated options which is why I'm now up at 12:40 writing this, oops.

We also walked by a pub called Duke of Argyll, which is where the Scottish part of my family is from.

Afterward, we walked through Chinatown, which was absolutely enchanting. My friend C is from Shanghai, and I really like food from places all over China, so we were both excited.

We ended up sitting outside at See Woo, a dim-sum restaurant that had mapo tofu, which I name as my favorite food in the world. That's also one of the first things she and I ever talked about when we were becoming friends. We both want to learn Cantonese and she suggested we take it together.

I took the train up and got home a bit after 9. I continued my multiplayer Terraria game with my stepbrother H for a couple hours, and now I'm here. And I think I might finally be ready to go to sleep.

[brianna-lei]

Butterfly Soup Asks #16

This time including the squad as DnD characters, Liz facts, Noelle getting her yaoi education, and more

I’ve only played Dungeons & Dragons once (1) in my life so I’m no expert! I’d consider my thoughts suggestions (like with my takes on the charaters’ MBTI types, which I’m not an expert of either): 

Noelle as a Wizard sounds right, since she definitely can’t do anything reliant on physical strength. She would be an asshole and attempt things like building a Clone Army

AKARSHA THE BARD. Rogue sounds too cool for her

Diya: I actually want to say she’s a Ranger because the Wiki on 5th edition says “The Beast Master archetype forges a connection between civilization and beasts, allowing the character to interact with animals in certain ways including gaining an animal companion to control.“ Fighter and Knight also sound plausible though! 

Min: Barbarian with high Strength and no Intelligence and Wisdom

I don’t want to say too much because I want to save things for the sequel, but here’s some stuff:

She actually played against Diya in youth leagues before she transitioned. That’s why she recognizes Diya+specifically approached her to sign the baseball club form while Diya doesn’t recognize her. At the first club meeting Liz tells her “I was at one of your games when you were little” -- This is purposefully ambiguous/misleading (sounds like Liz was just watching) because she passes and doesn’t want to out herself to a bunch of club members she doesn’t know well

After transitioning she quit baseball and switched to softball. It was weird being the one trans girl on a team of cis dudes, and additionally when she was younger she sort of felt like she had to prove she was a girl; she naturally has feminine taste, but she’d overperform it by 25%. It wasn’t until she got close to Chryssa and found out she also liked baseball that she reclaimed her interest in it

She has a nice resting face so strangers tend to ask her for directions 

Sunburns easily

Yesss check the FAQ guys! Fangames are fine as long as you explicitly say it’s a fangame!! 

I’m almost mad I didn’t think of this myself. I’m one of those people who overuses “spoopy” 

All art in the game (including the title screen) can be downloaded here!

NO!!! 

Noelle. The day the others find out will be the End of her

Akarsha was reading some yaoi so it came up in conversation, and since Noelle had never heard of it Akarsha gleefully educated her (to Noelle’s horror). Noelle was extremely scandalized that Akarsha kept sending her inappropriate images, and Akarsha was like “i’m doing this out of the kindness of my heart! it’s for ur education!! me: Master Teacher. call me sensei”  

Following this Akarsha changed her chat name to YAOI SEME as seen at the beginning of the game 

Diya and Noelle: Never tried it

Min: Has tried it 

Akarsha: She constantly makes weed jokes but actually only does it rarely 

Yes, I’m planning on exploring this more in the sequel! 

Diya; Dee-ya. Rhymes with “See ya”

Min-seo: Korean way, but most characters like Diya pronounce it like Min-so, with the “Min” rhyming with “win” (not like “mean”). The “so” is one syllable (not like “see oh”)  

Akarsha: uh-KAR-sha

Noelle: No L 

I was planning on making the sprites blink! I’m still a bit sad I didn’t end up doing it

It’s supposed to be fall 2008 when they’re in high school, but I took a LOT of artistic liberties when it came to the references. For example, Akarsha makes a Durarara reference even though the anime didn’t come out until 2010, and there’s a lot of modern memes that ended up in there too...I couldn’t hold back...

The IGF trailer video is especially modern-day meme-wise -- since it broke the 4th wall, it was like, all bets are off. Don’t think too hard about it!

I wanted to put a lot of 90s and early 00s hits in the game for the nostalgia factor, like Complicated, Rock Your Body, Dilemma, etc. I think it would’ve made the experience even more surreal for players who are around my age!

I don’t own the rights to all the music so I can’t distribute it around for people to download! Here’s where you can find everything:

Thought Projection by Ketsa

Holding Your Breath by Ketsa

Thoughts of You by Ketsa

2011-13 by Ketsa

Miyauchi Yuri/110515 (miltata remix) by Miltata

Night Tourist by Miltata

Sound413_Images(short) by Miltata

Sound429_Floating Cloud (draft) by Miltata

Side by Side by Miltata

Blooming by Miltata

Romaras by Miltata

Little Circle by Miltata

Daydream by Miltata

Calling Project 2 by .que

Flame of Love by YOSHI

Valar Morghulis by Bloodgod

Overflowing by Tatsuya Kato

My Heart Will Go On - Recorder By Candlelight by Matt Mulholland

At one point Diya finds out what it means on her own. After she finds out, she uses it for the actual meaning :) (added this to the FAQ now) 

I can totally relate to all of them, but I’d say Diya! (added this to the FAQ now) 

that sounds a bit alarming

(I added this to the FAQ page now, thanks for reminding me)  I’m fine with people shipping whatever!! The only thing I can think of that’d make me uncomfortable is incest and shipping Diya and Min with male characters – other than that, go nuts

Oh noo im sorry, that must’ve been stressful! For those who don’t know, I chatted about my game for a few minutes last week with MEGA (a USC club I used to be in!). I’ve adapted them here with what I assume what the questions were: 

1. Is that your cat on your Skype icon? 

yeah it is!! it's burrito 

(people think it’s a cute name) 

LOL glad you guys approve

2. Was the game made in Renpy? What do you think of Renpy vs. Twine? 

yep! it's made in renpy! I actually started out in twine -- twine is impossible if your game is like longer than an hour and is image heavy. the engine started lagging so bad it would take 30 secs to do anything

2. Would you eat a tiny 2 inch man for $100 million?

LOL it's hard..it's a lot of money. I don't think I would

(but you could use that money to save many more lives! utilitarianism) 

it's a real dude tho! i'd feel awful for him haha it's hard when you have to physically do it LOL

3. How long did it take for you to make Butterfly Soup? 

FOREVER. I thought of it in my junior year over winter break

4. Was it for school (like an assignment)? 

nah! just on my own

(people saying that’s impressive) 

yeah!! self motivation

5. What’s your favorite part of the game? 

hmmmmM I like the "date" with min in the dream. it's so fun, with the dog park

6. Which character do you relate to the most? 

diya!! social anxiety queen, so relatable

(people comment on how she runs around when anxious) 

i really did that before my sat once, ran 2 miles at the school's track

7. Are you from the San Francisco Bay Area

yeah i'm from the bay! east bay

8. Which year did you first come up with Butterfly Soup? 

winter 2014 i think

(people trying to calculate which year was my junior year) 

i graduated a year early so junior year was also senior year

9. Are you making a sequel? 

yes!! once ihave more time. i have a lot of ideas for stuff that goes after

10. Was this a prequel to Pom Gets Wi-Fi? Or maybe spiritual successor?

this is a prequel. i dunno about spiritual successor tho, they're a bit differnt

11. Any tips on how to balance schoolwork and working on personal projects? 

hmm...i honestly sucked at this and could only work on it on breaks lol...if you can try to work it into your school projects, like some bit of it...

other than that i cant think of anything LOL it's hard

12. How did you organize yourself making such a long game? Any tips? 

it was SUPER hard to organize, i was really lost until i split it into 4 sections with each character. so if you're planning on making a game this big definitely think about forcing yourself into sections like that

the art was the most confusing to do bc of how many assets there were. i was going to say "have consistent naming conventions" but that's literally impossible LOL it'll always become inconsistent no matter how hard u try

13. What part of the game took the longest (writing? art?) 

writing, actually, despite how much i complain about art assets. it's really hard making sure the structure and themes come across correctly. like pacing is so hard. art is like #2 biggest time sink

14. How early in did you write the Akarsha/Min skateboard scene?

that came pretty late haha i put it in at last second

15. Are the characters based on real people? 

they're all inspired by combinations of ppl i know! i wouldn't say based on them, tho. for example min is like a combination of 3 friends i have, strategically arranged to play her part in the story

character design is design so u still gotta be deliberate about it

16. Who’s the other cat on the computer? (they’re referring to the cat on my desktop wallpaper) 

that one's maru! he's a famous japaense cat. he's super photogenic

(people speculating that he’s the “tube one”) 

the tube one? probably. he's famous for going into stuff

17. What was your favorite aspect of working on the game? 

definitely getting to put specific Asian-American experiences into it

i was like HAHOH i can do this and no one can stop me! it was really fun getting to do this without any creative direction from like, a studio or anything. so i could just go bonkers. i hate pitching stuff so

18. Any writing advice? 

definitely have other people beta your writing as soon as possible! they always catch stuff you missed. also this is like a cheat, make your characters really extreme. like find one aspect of yourself, and turn it up to 11 and make it into a character. that way they'll be relatable and memorable at the same time. i think most people don't make their characters extreme enough so they're all kinda samey

19. (I can’t remember what they asked me here, sorry! They were asking if a specific meme was in the game)

LMAO nah it's not. i did briefly think about it though, i will admit

20. Would you eat a Gusher the size of your hand? 

that would be pretty cool. i don't think i could eat it all at once tho...i would try to save it. like half

You’re welcome, I’m really happy to hear it helped the game feel relatable!!  

Thank you! I hope you have a good day too!!

haha I feel like my game is almost propaganda bc so many people wish they had girlfriends after playing it! the agenda...Thank you for waiting for the sequel, it makes me super happy to hear people are looking forward to it! 

You’re welcome!! I’ll do my best!!! 

You’re welcome!!!! :>

You’re welcome!!! 

same I’m really happy so many people find them relatable! you’re welcome!! 

You’re welcome!! my kids can never get enough love im very happy 

I’m glad you liked it! Thanks for the support! TT_TT

[kpurereactions]

Can I hear about the other story too admin Minlee~? ✨

SO WHAT HAD HAPPENED WAS…LOL kidding. WARNING! This is going to look like a mess because when I talk about this…it’s a mess & I’m a mess lmfao

THIS IS SUPER LONG 

So I attended B.A.P’s LOE 2016 in San Francisco, CA. This is my first time seeing them, I couldn’t go to the 1st two LOEs & I cried lmao. So anyway, I had a little over $200 in my bank account & after I purchased two tickets, I only had $2 LMFAO ANYTHING FOR B.A.P!!! I didn’t go to the venue until around 4pmish…stood in line for 3 hours. (I’ve stood in line for Infinite for 6hrs, 3hrs is nothing) We stood in the wrong line LMFAO we stood in the VIP line but quickly learned it wasn’t the general ad line. The general ad line was WAAAAAAYYYY much shorter THANK GOD! While we were standing in line the staff were selling BAP albums to whoever wanted a chance at Hi-TOUCH with BAP. I didn’t care to purchase it AT THE TIME because I would’ve been EXTREMELY upset if I had paid $40 & I got a regular album. So 7pm comes around & they finally open the doors & we’re let in, I buy a shit load of merch! I’m not going to list it all but I bought a lightstick; that my baby sister just broke recently ): Anyway we find our seats & the show is about to begin. My friend that I met online had told me she was attending earlier that day! I was stoked to meet her! We hugged when we saw each other & honestly that is the best way to meet someone for the first time! NOW!!!!! I DID NOT REALIZE THAT I WAS NOT SMILING BACK AT THEM! UNTIL I GET TO FCUKING HIMCHAN & HE DIPS HIS HEAD DOWN A BIT & SMILES REALLY BIG AT ME!!!!!! AND I SMILE BACK, I CAN FEEL MY WHOLE BODY GETTING HOT (FROM BEING SHY, NOT THAT OTHER THING YA NASTY! LOL) SO I PUT MY HAND UP AND HE HOLDS MY HAND AS IT SLIPS OUT OF HIS T^T I CAN’T EVEN FUCKING DEAL. AFTER THAT EVEYRTHING IS A BLUR. ALL I KNOW IS THAT JONGUP WAS AFTER & THEN BANG WAS LAST, HE WASN’T TOO HAPPY THAT DAY :( I WAS SAD HE WASN’T. THEN I EXIT THE ROOM & THE VENUE & I JUST FREEZE UP…..LIKE EXCUSE ME….DID THAT JUST REALLY HAPPEN?! WHAT?! I CAN’T, I JUST CAN’T. I swore to myself that I was not going toto wash my hand UNTIL THE NEXT DAY after I wake up. I then got scolded not to stand in front of the venue doors….which i mean i was like 8ft away from, rude sir. Anyway my friend leaves to go catch the last BART train & I’m like still in shock and I need to tell someone so I call my best friend that live sin Georgia so it’s like midnight there & i just start balling my eyes out telling her how I met BAP & that HIMchan smiled at me & I’m like I’ll let her go cos i know its late over there aand I’m gonna go wait for BAP to leave the venue then I’ll go home. So I walk over to the side of the building where some other fans are at & GIRRRRLLLLLL WE WAITED A HOUR OUT IN THE COLD! They didn’t leave til 11pm. You when they walk out we obvious scream lmfao & I’m right in the front of the barricade that is like 20 ft from the car & I shout “ I LOVE YOU!!!” AND I KID YOU FUCKING MOON FUCKING JONGUP HEARS ME & ACKNOWLEDGES ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I SWEAR! HE FUCKING MADE EYE CONTACT WITH ME! FOR 2 SECONDS & SMILED SHYLY & THEN GOT INTO THE VAN!!!!!!! AND THEN I CRIED. BAP leaves & then of course we all leave. I talked about it the whole way home (1hr) So remember how I said I swore I wasn’t going to wash my hand until I wake up the next morning,,,,well I failed. I went to use the restroom when I got home & I WASHED MY HAND T^T I WAS SO SAD lmfao I spammed text my best friend who was still awake & told her i washed my hand and she laughed lmfao I also texted my other good friend that attend the same concert & told her I got the chance to Hitouch BAP & she asked if I told Bang that she loves him & I told her no cos I myself didnt even tell Himchan that I love him, and I hope he stays the way he is becasue hes perfect the way he is. and doesnt need to lose weight becos I dont care about that and I only care about him being happy. She then scolded me that I should’ve been the one to tell him that becos we all know how much he needs to be told that. I then cried cos I had the chance and I didn’t. But now I know and next time, if there is a next time, I’ll be more prepared.

SOOOOOOO yes, that is how my BAP concert & Hitouch went….That was long lol

Thanks for asking me about it. I love BAP & that is forever a memory/day I will cherish forever. It makes me happy cry lol (Yes, I got emotional while writing this)

**EDIT: Here’s photos :) -Hold on I have more. I gotta switch computers. LOL

Minlee