#also u can timeskip or do anything u wish

[loveaffairxc]

A simple thank you escaped his lips as she mentioned the spare room, a stark reminder of how empty it had been when they first bought the house. He never imagined he'd be the first to use it—the irony wasn’t lost on him. He could almost find the humor in it if he thought about it long enough.

As he stepped outside to retrieve his luggage, the world greeted him with a sharp contrast—the trunk of the car creaked open, revealing the worn bags that held the remnants of his life. He looked up, and there it was, that white circle of sunlight, almost blinding against the sky, yet it did nothing to diminish the coolness of the breeze that whispered against his skin. For a moment, he felt a fleeting sense of peace, an unfamiliar contentment in the midst of all the change. Maybe, just maybe, things would be okay for now.

The stairway stretched upward in a gentle curve, narrow and intimate, as if guiding him through a quiet, forgotten part of the world. Above, a pendant light hung delicately from the ceiling. Each step he took released a soft groan from the old mahogany beneath his feet, a sound both comforting and nostalgic. The wood, though polished to a subtle sheen, bore the marks of countless footsteps—worn patches where time had left its imprint. These imperfections, far from detracting from the house’s beauty, only deepened its character, like wrinkles on an old face that has seen too much and forgotten nothing.

At the top, the landing split into two doors—one leading to the spare room, another to her bedroom, or what had once been their shared sanctuary. The door to her bedroom was slightly ajar, a crack wide enough to reveal the soft shadows within. He felt a deep, almost primal urge to push it open, to step inside and reclaim the space that once was theirs. Yet, he knew how wrong that was. He lingered there, his gaze heavy with unspoken longing, before finally turning away and heading to the spare room.

The spare room was smaller, simpler, a place that had always seemed to wait for someone who never arrived. He left one piece of luggage on the floor, its worn leather sagging slightly from the years it had traveled with him. The other he placed onto the bed with a controlled firmness. The quilt was immaculately kept, the faint scent of lavender lingering in the air. Everything in the room was pristine, almost too pristine, as if she had tried to erase the passage of time, to make it welcoming. With a swift, practiced motion, he unlatched the suitcase, revealing a haphazard mix of clothes. Buried beneath the layers of fabric were his guns, polished and well-maintained. These weren’t just weapons; in a way they were like reminders. Each gun had a story, a history forged in the heat of battle and the cold calculations of survival. The oldest among them had been with him since the war, a standard-issue revolver that had seen him through the blood and mud of countless battles. Its grip was worn, the metal tarnished from years of use, but it still held a certain reliability. Another had come into his possession long after the war, during the early days of trying to adapt to civilian life. He’d taken up hunting, in the quiet woodlands. The rifle, with its polished wood stock and sleek barrel, was a gift from a fellow veteran who believed in the therapeutic value of stalking deer through the underbrush. He had accepted it with a nod. The last was a newer acquisition, picked up from a small, unremarkable shop in a village far from where he now stood. The man who sold it to him had the look of someone who had lost everything, his eyes dull and voice flat as he described the gun’s make and model. Frank hadn’t asked any questions; he’d simply handed over the money and walked out with the weapon, sensing that it might serve a purpose one day.

He stared at them for a moment, a flicker of disbelief crossing his mind. Before the war, guns had been nothing more than abstract objects, something distant and almost irrelevant in his world. He had never owned one, never felt the need to. The idea of handling a firearm, let alone keeping a collection of them, would have seemed absurd to the man he once was. But now, here he was, discarding his clothes carelessly and gravitating toward the guns as soon as he got home, as if they were the only things that could anchor him to the present. It was a strange, almost surreal shift. He had brought them here, to this house, not out of paranoia but out of a need for control, for protection. In his mind, the most important rooms of the house—hers, theirs—deserved to be guarded, as if the presence of these silent sentinels could somehow preserve what little was left of a world he once knew.

He unwrapped one of the guns, feeling the familiar weight of it in his hand, the cool metal a stark contrast to the warmth of the room. For a moment, he considered where to place it, where it would be most effective, most protective. He left one on the bed, then made his way toward her room. He hesitated at the door, his hand hovering over the handle as a wave of uncertainty washed over him. From downstairs, he could hear the faint clinking of dishes in the kitchen, a subtle reminder of her presence as he wrestled with the unease that had taken hold of him. He took a few hesitant steps inside. The bedroom was just as he remembered—familiar, yet somehow distant. His intent was simple: to place the gun in the drawer of her bedside table. But as he approached it, his eyes lingered on the items arranged on the surface. He couldn’t help himself, curiosity tugging at him to look a little closer, to see what had changed, what had stayed the same. He remembered the cream-white telephone with gold intricate details that used to sit on her bedside table, always within reach, and the silver-framed photo of their wedding day. Now, both were gone, replaced by a simple vase of flowers, their petals starting to wilt. This felt logical, even normal. The first time he reentered the house, he noticed that all traces of their life together had vanished from the walls, every photograph carefully removed. Still, a pang hit his chest each time he crossed the threshold, it was now inevitable it would resurface every once in a while whenever he found himself in these familiar rooms. With a heavy breath, he opened the drawer of her bedside table. Inside, he found a small collection of items: neatly folded handkerchiefs, a leather-bound journal, a compact mirror with its surface slightly tarnished, and a few letters. He carefully placed one of the guns inside, its cold metal juxtaposed against the warmth of the drawer’s contents. As he adjusted the items, his fingers brushed against something familiar. He came across a photograph of himself, tucked beneath the others as if hidden away for safekeeping. He frowned slightly, lifting it to the light, inspecting it as though he were seeing it for the first time. The face staring back at him was almost unrecognizable—there was a youthfulness in the eyes, a vitality that felt distant now. It struck him how a few years could reshape a man, could carve away at the person he once was. He wondered how long it had been since she’d kept this—if she’d forgotten about it, leaving it there to gather dust in the quiet corners of her life. The cynical part of him believed that. But another part, quieter and more hopeful, knew she still cared for him. To what extent, he wasn’t sure.

With another deep breath, he let the photograph go, placing it gently back where he found it. His gaze wandered around the room, eventually settling on the closet. He hesitated for a moment, torn between giving in to his curiosity or respecting the boundaries of the space. Before he could settle on a choice, his body moved almost of its own volition, guided by an unspoken need. It was too late now anyway, he knew his curiosity somehow always got the better of him. The closet door creaked open, and he found himself drawn to its depths. He glanced upwards at the top shelf, his eyes skimming over some boxes and forgotten trinkets, before shifting his attention to the cascade of dresses hanging below. His eyes were drawn to a blue dress that had been a favorite of hers, worn often during the last summer they had shared together. He pushed the clothes aside, parting them in the middle to reveal what lay beneath the hanging garments. The array of dresses, some long and flowing, had concealed the bottom part of the closet. As he moved the clothing aside, the hidden space slowly came into view. There was nothing of particular interest beneath the dresses—just the usual assortment of items stored out of sight.

But the sight of the blue dress now stirred a profound ache in his chest. He reached out and took it into his hands. As the fabric brushed against him, he was enveloped by the faint scent of her perfume—subtle yet intoxicating. It was as though the very essence of her lingered within the threads of the dress. Holding it close, he inhaled deeply, the sweet yet faintly fresh scent enveloping him in a strangely satisfying, albeit disconcerting embrace. What was he doing, acting as if he were mourning someone with whom he had just shared breakfast with?; What would she think if she saw him? the sensation felt almost surreal. This might be the closest he could come to her again, he thought to himself, and grappled with the possibility that he might never fully accept this reality.

Esther's fingers brushed the table as she rose, gathering the crumbs left behind.

“Well, there’s plenty more where they came from.” She replied, the small smile that played at the corners of her lips fading ever so slightly. She’d been watching him, noting how he resisted even the slightest bite to eat, as if every morsel was a burden to him. She’d always admired his resilience, the way he’d always find strength no matter what life had thrown his way, but in that moment she realised just how much the war had scarred him.

"There's no rush, you know." She said softly, her voice carrying a warmth she hoped would ease his discomfort. She glanced toward the hallway, her thoughts shifting to the spare room she’d prepared for him upstairs. It’d been a while since anyone had stayed there. She’d tidied it thoroughly, wanting him to feel as comfortable as possible. But deep down there was a hesitation in her heart, a fear that he might feel like an intruder in a place that was once so familiar to him. "But I'll leave you to get settled in the spare room." She began, her voice faltering slightly as she watched her words. "It's all ready for you, and if there’s anything else you need just let me know."

She turned back to face him, her eyes searching his for any sign of how he was feeling. She knew this must have been just as difficult for him as it was for her, if not more so. The house, with all its memories, was a reminder of a life they once shared, a life that now seemed so distant.

[hxltic]

Im not sure how to request cause this is like my first time doing it but would u write anything w iwazumis timeskip? like how hes an athletic trainer.. YK DO UR MAGIC idek how to request also x reader if thats ok. THANK U

Hey ofc!! You can be as vulgar and straightforward as you want, this is a safe space😘 (idk if you wanted nsfw or not so if not I’m sorry! I just made it suggestive because I was unsure :P)

The ass crack of dawn peeks through your window, enough to have your body twisting and turning until you’re inevitably forced awake.

Of course you drag yourself to the bathroom and check yourself out a bit, admiring how your new waist training is going and your puffy lips of the morning before brushing your teeth to start the day. Some argue you’re a morning person, but you aren’t. And you feel no kind of guilt admitting that.

You only get up because you have to—to remain consistent, especially with allowing yourself to grow not only physically, but emotionally, finally feeling free from the weights of stress by exercising and feeling good about your figure.

Also, the routine is great for you. It makes you feel productive in the morning, so now when you reflect before, there was this emptiness that came with sitting at home with the same three things you have to do on repeat.

And then of course, the motivation of going to the gym for a man you’ve been seeing around recently. He recognizes you now, probably casually assuming the relationship is nothing more than a mutual gym buddy.

And it’s likewise; you wouldn’t call it a crush. The both of you are grown, just two adults with the same hobby even though you are relatively newer to the activity.

So you pack up your bag and tip your head back for a swig of the protein smoothie you prepared and head out the door.

The gym doesn’t smell anything like how you imagined it would when you first cluelessly walked in. It actually smells clean (mainly from the overwhelming scent of chlorine in the pool water), and it wasn’t super busy around this time. If there were people, they definitely weren’t teenagers coming for their afternoon rounds. The receptionist waves back at you as you pass.

Today was legs. You recognize how far you’ve come, because initially, no day was your favorite, each as long and tortuous as the last. But this has got to be what it means to become accustomed to the pain. Does that make all gym-goers masochists?

If so, Iwaizumi has got to be the worst, because the only other person insane enough—that even remotely looks like he does anything other than train—to be here before you, is him.

“Morning,” you chime. His headphones are off, so the switch that usually tells you when people don’t wish to be spoken to doesn’t go off.

To your delight, he responds with just as much pleasure without turning around, currently sitting on the Lax machine and tugging the resistant handles. “Good morning,” he grunts.

He eventually does, even as he attempts to convince himself to stay focused on his set, but even the discipline he’s built over the years couldn’t prevent him from catching a glimpse of you. You were sitting your stuff down nearby, relocating to the floor to stretch.

He’s been watching you. Not in a creepy way, he justifies, but it becomes a habit when you’re working how he does.

Your progress is a miracle. He could count on one hand the amount of people that come in fresh and immediately get to working, just to return consistently, and cycle through this process until they reach their desired figure and continue after that. You, however, stepped in with a determination on your face he’d never seen before.

You hadn’t requested a trainer, and by what he sees, didn’t need one either. He remembers when you came in talking about how badly you wanted to rid of your little tummy, as well as slim down your plush thighs, pleading someone to teach you how. Of course he knew how; he keeps his work strictly professional with the women who come in asking for the same thing.

He’d always found the little pudge attractive, but it’s your body. It’s just somehow, he wasn’t on the verge of telling them how good it looks or the pure desire he has to press on the fat while his head is between their thighs like he was you. Someone must have heard his prayers though, because instead of slimming your legs down, you became comfortable with the idea of them getting stronger, ultimately making them slightly thicker.

The man was close to finishing the set, but that one glimpse of you had him do five extra for good measure since he lost count. How could he focus?

As you split your legs and tilt to one side, you watch him not too far. The black compression shirt he wears hugs his carved body perfectly, only cementing this fact as his back and arm muscles flex with every controlled pull of the bar. Everything about him was sharp from his shape to the hair on his head.

It was no doubt he was attractive, and since having graduated high school, attention wasn’t just found anywhere. Maybe some small talk will help?

“What are you doing today?” He hears you call. He almost flinches with what he thinks you’re asking until you add, “Workouts I mean.”

Iwaizumi chuckles at your mishap, more for himself, but it flushes your cheeks nonetheless. It’s a genuine, gentle sound. “Arms. Tomorrow is core,” he says coolly.

“I hate arms. I should probably do them more often, but lifting is only fun if you’re already strong.”

“I see where you’re coming from,” he pulls off the machine, rotating himself on the seat to face you. You’re in a lunge now, oversized t-shirt covering half of the skin tight shorts desperately trying to contain the glutes you’ve grown. He makes sure to force his emerald green eyes to yours. “You won’t get stronger if you don’t give it a try.”

You scoff, “You sound like my old therapist.”

The humor you two shared was nothing more than the surface level awkward kind so this unexpected comment from you had him laughing. Actually laughing. “And you sound like an old friend of mine.”

Smiling at this, you get one more good stretch in and come to your feet. You stand proudly with your hands on your hips, staring at him.

He blinks around happily, “What?”

“You said to give it a try right? Show me the way."

—•—

“I can’t do this,” you say, already struggling just with the form part of the exercise. You switched positions with him since it was closest machine. “How do I pull it if I can’t move my back?”

“Well, that’s the workout part,” he walks around the seat while inspecting you, waiting for you to figure it out with his advice. “Sit up completely straight and slightly lean back. Stay in that position the entire time, but try to pull the bar down to you instead of pulling yourself up to it.”

You try to replicate what you saw him doing. By this point, you had gotten majority of the positioning right, even keeping your back straight, but the damned bar wouldn’t move an inch. “Are you sure the setting on this thing is right?”

“Oh shit—” He pauses at this, then renders that you’re completely right. You’re trying to pull his weight.

As he shuffles over to the side of the machine to adjust it, you watch him with a smug expression and your arms crossed. I’m not just that weak, I knew it, it reads.

Moments later he comes back around, “That’s my bad, try it now.”

And you’re finally able to do it, but your form falters when you successfully pull the bar to your chest. He knows you know, you’re a smart girl, so he gives you a few more tries to correct it. “I feel like I’m about to fall,” you say finally.

“Here, that means you’re leaning too far.” He comes and presses a hand to your back, pushing you forward. “Don’t think about it too much. I’ll hold you right here for a few until you can support yourself.”

He was already hovering beside you, lurking and seeping into all your senses, making the air warmer than it usually is in the gym. With his palm on your back too, you’re starting to think this little affection of yours is getting out of hand. You don’t even look to see how much it has helped.

Somehow, you do eventually get through the sets, but you hadn’t realized that during that time he would actually train you. It was progressive overload, and he brought the weight up to what he thought you could handle each time. You were on the last few.

“C’mon, you got it.”

“I don’t,” you grunt while somewhat laughing, still pulling it to your chest. His voice is more declarative now. You deem it as his professional tone. You also wonder which voice he tends to use in—

“You do. It’s one more—make it your best.”

And you do just that, slumping on the seat in victory.

“Good girl,” he praises, clapping, and he changes the weight on the machine to just five before twisting around and holding a hand out. He helps you up when you take it, but you’re really trying to figure out if what he said was professional if it made you clench your thighs.

“Ready for the next?” His lips stretch into a smile, already predicting your answer.

You bend and get your smoothie, popping the top and drinking, “There’s a next? What’s next?”

“Pull ups of course.”

Truthfully, doing pull ups right after lax for someone who doesn’t really train arms is a death wish. It’s just this once though, and your arms will already be sore, so he might as well make the most of it while the adrenaline is there.

“Oh dear God,” you sigh.

“I’ll do them with you,” he reassures, chuckling.

—•—

And he stands on his word, because after walking over to the bar, he clips the belt attached to weight around his hips. The bar was relatively high, even he can admit, so he isn’t surprised when you ask how the hell you’re supposed to get up there.

And you weren’t even necessarily short, it’s just the bar was made for six-feet-and-over men and athletes. So people like you were left out, hence the stacked boxes meant for help beside it.

Iwaizumi makes sure the belt is secure around himself before walking over to you, taking a stance directly behind.

He commands, “Arms up, sweetheart.” And it must be the proximity, because you do just that without a fight. The pet name contributed too, you’re sure.

But when he lifts you, he first drags his hands from your shoulder blades, to your ribs, and into the small of the your back. So smooth you’re questioning if he did it on purpose.

He couldn’t help it. Not when he’s hovering behind you, almost a foot taller. With one small nudge of his hips forward, he’d rest comfortably right between your ass, smelling the coconut shampoo of your hair. Though instead of being a pervert, he’d stick to the nicknames and the gentle touches until you get the damn hint.

Sometime later he’s effortlessly hauling himself up, counting one by one with you. He says you’ll only do 3 sets of ten as if it was easy. Either way, it was burning by the ninth.

—•—

Finally you’re done. The only reason your arms aren’t completely limp is your heightened senses from being around the attractive man next to you. He literally regulates your blood flow.

And you for damn sure regulate his.

“Okay, now you have to do my workouts,” you perk up.

He unclips the belt, turning to face you, amused. “I have to do your workouts?”

Your arms come to a cross offensively. “What does that mean? Yes. I did your arm day, now you have to do my leg day.”

He throws his hands in the air defensively, the curl of his lips threatening to break his character, “I’m just saying it won’t be the sa—”

“This way!”

—•—

This was a horrible idea.

He’s situated on the angled leg press machine at a diagonal, now gripping onto the handle bars. The amount of circular plates you usually have on it are already there. You’re standing beside him.

“Are you sure you don’t want to add weight? I usually go more than this,” he challenges.

“Fuck you— no.”

His laughter intensifies at your irritation. Then he brings his legs down slow and controlled, somehow still managing to appear like he could do it with his fucking finger if he tried. You’re not surprised, he’s extremely fit; though you had already catered to this by changing the weight to whatever your highest weight was.

He guffaws again at your blank expression. “Fine. How much more do you need?” You sigh.

He appears to think for a moment. Instead of calculating the math like he should be, he’s actually doing nothing of the sort. “Get up there.”

He bends his legs as if confirming he’s dead serious by allowing you to actually step foot on the back of the plate. You stand there still, having not even realized what he’s asking you to do. “What?”

“Get your sweet ass up there and that should be about what my usual weight is.” He shoots a nonchalant glance to the machine. “You won’t fall, if that’s what’s bothering you.”

After a few moments, with an incredulous look painted on your face, you slowly step to the lowered machine, and push yourself up and on to the back, past the weighted plates, to sit not-very-comfortably in the middle. “Uhm…”

“Perfect.”

This time, it didn’t look as easy, but he very much did an entire press to extend his legs out. You watch in wonder over the plate as he carried your weight and plus some just in his legs.

It was his arm day, and you didn’t get to fully watch him do the pull ups since the focus was keeping yourself on the bar. But you got a glimpse when he finished, biceps flexing and pulling extra weight then too. He was strong. You wonder if he puts it to use with his partner?

With his partner. What if he does have a partner? You shake your head, no, he wouldn’t have asked you to do what you’re doing if he did.

His grunts were a nice addition too.

Counting for him aloud, and not completely sure if you didn’t skip a number even though you’re only going to ten, you helped him through the set. It had been a while since there was someone to cheer him on. He was always doing the cheering.

“Okay okay,” you wait for him to finish the set, then get off. It feels so good to have your feet on the ground, sure that you won’t be yelled at by the gym staff to remove yourself from the equipment. “You’ve proved yourself, muscleman.”

“Great, I’ll take you out Saturday then?” He asks, pressing up the remaining weight easy and locking up the machine so he can leave it.

A flush runs across your cheeks, driving you to pick up your drink and sip to hide it. “You don’t know me. What if I have a husband and kids at home?”

You were projecting, you know that. It was fresh on your mind since you slightly wanted to ask him the same question. He stalks over to you.

“I don’t see a ring on your finger,” he observes, nodding to your right hand, making you look as if you didn’t know it was bare. He only stops walking until you’re face to face, way too close to just be a professional interaction. It only worsens when his thumb and index finger pinches your chin, his eyes sending flames through yours. “And let’s both be honest— if there was someone waiting for you at home, you wouldn’t be here with me.”

Let alone at the gym at all, he wanted to add. Whatever pussy was letting you come here to workout instead of telling you how good it feels to have your thick thighs ricocheting off his skin or how good your stretch marks look after being swollen with a child for nine months, doesn’t deserve you anyway.

He doesn’t kiss you, but he swipes your lips with his finger and retreats. The heat doesn’t dissipate.

“Saturday at 7?” You speak softly. So softly and breathless you aren’t even sure if he heard it as he walks away.

“My number’s in your bag, beautiful,” he winks, and then he’s turning the corner, back to where you met earlier in the morning.

smash

If you wanted like actual nsfw, (whoever sent the ask) just send in another into my inbox or just dm me asking!! LMAO

You get unlimited access!!

©️hxltic

[mekiiiii]

ethereal beauty

summary: a mermaid? they exist? unbelievable, alhaitham thought until he saw you while reading. a couple of peering eyes that would somehow come to a promise of "let us meet again one day"

a/n: this is probably ooc but im trying to write as close as i possibly frikin can (s/c)=scale color bc ur a mermaid babe

content: mermaid!reader x alhaitham, childhood friends, (forgotten) promises, fluff, many MANY timeskips, brief mentions of alhaithams late grandma, siblings? you have siblings, ur a dancer but also a scholar? idk what im doing, gn reader, i use mermaid more as a gender neutral term u can think of it as merman too!, ooc alhaitham🤷

pt2

(lowercase intended)

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

alhaitham, a sharp kid, a mere boy who inherited his late-father's enjoyment for reading...

now was going to the docks to fetch some things for his grandmother, when he noticed a slight unusual glimmer in the water. usually it's just the light from the sun to the water, but this one was different. it appeared more vibrant.

must be his imagination, he thought.

-

a sleepy alhaitham, despite his fatigue, he couldnt rest no matter how much we wished. he looks into the deep night and waning crescent moon. he deeply contemplated attempting to sleep, only to release it would end in failure and waste time anyways, he recalls in a book that sometimes night walks help people sleep, so walk he did.

...

he quietly walked, slipping from his grandmother's abode to the just to the docks of sumeru city. despite the bustling city, it has gone quiet around midnight. taking a seat near the edge of the dock, he stared into the waters, reminiscing of the intriguing sparkle of color he thought he saw, and then.. he saw it once more?

this time under the light of the crescent moon..

his eyes wandered from the book in his hands and to the waters of the quiet city. staring intensely as if he was.. looking for something..

a quiet swish of water was noticed and if not heard by the boy, out of his intense staring, his gaze seemed to soften but his eyes were wide in disbelief.

a pair of glowing (e/c) orbs peered at him, slowly rising a bit more out of the water, he noted down the noticable features of the mermaid.

a beautiful shade of (h/c), (s/c) scales, elf like ears that are decorated with said scales, and of course, curious eyes.

with a slight tilt of your head, he could tell you were curious or if not, confused. unlike others, you were yet to be taught that humans could be dangerous. some with bad intentions hidden by pure facades.

you sent your greetings, only for alhaitham to tilt his head signalling confusion just as you did.

quickly realizing he didnt quite understand, you simply said,

"hello.."

the quiet tone of your voice, the unfamiliarity of his first language was understood by alhaitham.

"hello, what's your name?"

"(y/n)"

"alhaitham, that's mine."

-

you and alhaitham have been friends for many years now. despite your, differences in both language and life. you both have a somewhat mutual understanding of each other.

alhaitham has been busy as of late, he seems to be a bit more down lately. has something happened? is he okay? he can tell you anything, he knows that right? the anxious feelings invade your mind and fill your thoughts.

"y/n."

the quiet tone of your name shook you, but of course, you quickly hummed in response. alhaitham hasn't spoke as much, but it will always be appreciated.

"i got accepted into the akademiya, meaning we won't be able to meet for the time being."

"oh?"

he nodded,

this would upset you, if it weren't for the fact that you as well had your fair of work needed to be done. helping your brother find a partner, crowning him, helping him find an assistant that would benefit his future kingdom. as well as your sister, who you would need to finish the final preparations for the declaration of her lead of the army she dreamed of leading, as well as helping her plan her wedding.

you were busy, so was alhaitham, but what could be upsetting him?

"well, can i ask you to promise me something?"

"it depends."

"haha, real funny,"

"whats the promise?"

"let us meet again one day."

you swear you heard him laugh a bit.

"alright."

-

you rarely came out of the water completely, let alone walked around. however, your brothers assistant has requested you fetch something for them, as they are too busy to do so themselves and apparently, it was at your brothers request.

you walked around in a dancers outfit, customized to match nilou's. you and her have been good friends for awhile and you both deeply enjoy each other's company.

you walk from different booths and stands, finally finding the item your brother requested. finally about to go back under the waters and to your abode. you're practically daydreaming about going home and resting in the comfort of your space... being able to have some personal time to your self and-

"Ugh."

you bumped into someone... falling on your butt in the process.

looking up, to see a man with grey hair, cyan eyes with a nice hue of orange towards the iris, and disappointed frown.

you couldve sworn you've seen that face before..

"apologies." he sighed.

then it clicked.

"alhaitham?" you spoke while he was walking away.

"hm?"

you couldnt believe it, it was alhaitham, as in the one you knew as a kid? the one who read you his books, taught you the language of teyvat, promised to see you again?!

"long time no see!" you grinned

"huh? who are you?" he said genuinely confused..

you stood there in disbelief, how could he.. your childhood friend, the one who agreed to the promise, forget you? his childhood mermaid friend..

"uhm? we were childhood friends 'haitham"

"were we?"

he couldnt have seriously forgotten..

or could he? maybe this was an act for his entertainment? but he actually looked puzzled, not as if he was trying to play a game or some sort.

"hm, maybe i was mistaken, apologies."

you couldn't take the embarrassment any longer, feeling the eyes of the people around you reminded you of your errand.

-

who would have thought, a mermaid royal advisor would end up being a scholar, sent on a mission t understand the world above, the very life they live.

nearly forgetting that your dearest childhood friend, alhaitham, was graduated from the akademiya..

let alone a scribe and the current acting grand sage. let's just say your disbelief was to the stars and beyond.

you don't think he recognized you, or even noticed you were in the akademiya.

the akademiya was easy for you, you were all knowing and all your project topics were based on the ancient ruins under the sea, let's say you easily handled this.

but with an upcoming test you find yourself in the library studying day and night.

..not really studying more like revising of what you had gone off of.. the test was more of your general knowledge and to see what you've learned from your years of study.

and of course, you were still a breathing, living, functioning being. therefore who could blame you if you just so happened to pass out... catch a little bit of a cold... and wake up in an entirely different room a week before the test..

not that anyone could blame you really...

"sleep is needed for the human body to function, you know that right?"

who could that be, you wonder....

nah who are you kidding, it's alhaitham.

"where am i," you attempted to get up before being slightly pushed down.

"at my house. don't get up, you're sick"

oh,

you furrowed your eyebrows as if trying to process what he said, well not if trying, you were processing what he said.

you're "sick" but you've never gotten sick in your life, no matter how much you overworked, under-slept, or how stressed out you were. you were never sick, but this time you are? how could this be?

this thinking was certainly turning your brain to mush considering you were answering alhaithams questions subconsciously.

"if i recall, you've said we met before and that we were childhood friends."

"could you refresh my memory?"

you stared into his eyes, it looks like his gaze was softened, not too focused on the sight in front of him.

subconsciously, you ruffled his hair, something you used to do when you were kids. alhaitham looked puzzled on why or what you were doing, wanting to move away but hesitating, it's as if he was letting his guard down.

only just a bit though..

"im y/n, dont you remember? the mermaid?"

he seemed to remember now,

"y/n? but why are you here?"

"for fun." you yawned.. "so sleepy.."

your hand slid down to his face, eventually falling back to your side, signaling that you were gonna fall asleep once more.

taking note of your drooping eyes and your body relaxing, he rubbed your scalp as if trying to ease you into sleep..

and it worked.... you thought you heard him say something, but you were much too tired to hear it.

but you did hear a few words.

"sweet dreams, y/n"

.

.

.

[doyouevenshipbr0]

top 10 strongest airbenders

this list is tough. we don’t see many airbenders at all throughout the show. but ive ranked all the other elements, so here’s this list now!

let’s go

*gyatso*- i dont want to put a nunber next to his name because i have 0 concrete evidence as to where he would rank. if i had to guess i feel like he’d be 2-3? but i just can’t put him there based off vibes alone lol. with that being said, i still have to give him credit. there is no number 10 lol sorry.

9. bumi- yeah he kinda sucks as an airbender lmao. i loveeeee bumi and to be so honest i really really REALLY wish he had stayed a nonbender. it was such an important part of his character and what made him so interesting. but alas he has to be an airbender. boring lame boo!!!!! but he does do a few cool things. good job bumi.

8. opal- boringggg snoozeeeee. i don’t really like opal. but she airbends which is cool. i dont remember her doing anything significant at all as an airbender though lol. maybe that’s on me because i dont care about her character so i just forgot, but from what i remember she’s a good airbender, just nothing special.

7. kai- kind of a similar situation to opal where he doesn’t seem to be special but i will say i think him and airbending compliment each other very well. he naturally is able to utilize airbending which is honestly reminiscent of aang to me a tiny bit. obviously he’s not on his level at all but the vibes are still there! but yeah other than natural ability he doesn’t have anything else of note imo. it’s kinda like he just plateaus after the timeskip i feel like? idk i shoulve made these lists immediately after my most recent rewatch lol.

6. meelo- hate him HAHAHAHA sorryyyyyyy. his fart stuff is so annoying. however i think its obvious that all of tenzins kids are great airbenders and it comes pretty naturally to them. so yeah all three are excellent he is just the least impressive to me.

5. ikki- i loveeeeeeee ikki omg. but she’s very similar to meelo to me in that she is clearly naturally gifted and practically a master airbender but i don’t remember her doing anything really impressive that would make her any higher. she gets to be higher than meelo because i like her way more and she doesn’t fartbend. congrats ikki!

4. zaheer- im kind of annoyed that he’s this high. like he should not be that good of an airbender but here he is i guess. he gave almost everybodyyyyy a run for their money during his season and was kicking lots of ass. idk why he’s so good, i guess because he was spiritually connected to airbending before he became an airbender, but he definitely is amazing. mf can fly which no one else can do. also the way he killed the earth queen was awesomeeeee! wish more airbenders could be more unhinged. but yeah he can’t be higher bc he lacks a fuck ton of experience.

3. jinora- people argue she’s the best airbender in tlok and ok she mightttt beeeee because of her spiritual abilities, but i do think she lacks some combat skills and experience. with that being said though her spiritual abilities make her insanely op. im just saying like if u average out her impeccable spiritual skills with her just good combat skills, she gets number 3 imo. but she is obviously a master who earns her tattoos at such a young age so that’s why she’s here! also i think in her adulthood she will surpass her dad, but she aint there yet!

2. tenzin- gonna get his con out of the way first, he has little to no spiritual connection. which i dont think is a HUGE detriment but it is a detriment nonetheless and it’s why i also kinda flip flop between him and jinora and who i think is the better airbender. but today, for me, it’s tenzin. what he lacks in spiritual ability he makes for in strength, agility, technique, IQ, skill, utilization, and literally any other feat you could think of. remember when he was making zaheer look like an absolute amateur? that was awesome. yeah he is the best airbender that isn’t an avatar in the whole series.

1. aang- LOLLLL im not following my own rulessss butttttt idc. there arent many airbenders to choose from anyways and for a majority of the first book we really only know aang as an airbender anyway soooo im bending my rules lol. i dont feel any need to give a big fat response. he is not like any airbender we ever see throughout the entire show and it is not even close.

[deripmaver]

I'm so happy to find another Casca Apostle hater™. Like it's so weird to find people who think it'll give Casca more narrative agency when it means she'd work for Griffith of all people. Not only that but it's part of this annoying trend where people ignore the fact that Casca is a good person. Casca was able to admit Guts was right to warn Griffith about that burning fort after the timeskip, didn't let Corkus kill him, wished that they could work together without fighting all the time and told Guts that Griffith needed him. If Casca can be that respectful to someone she hated then why in the hell would anyone expect her to sacrifice someone she loves??? She wouldn't do that, especially now that she doesn't idolize Griffith anymore. Even in Golden Age Judeau noticed Casca soften up to the point where she wasn't willing to sacrifice everyone for Griffith anymore and during the Eclipse Casca is not only angrier about this betrayal than Guts (which isn't much lol) but she tries to stop Judeau from sacrificing himself for her. She loves people too much to put them through anything like the Eclipse and she always has.

YESSSSS ANON EXACTLY!!!!! it just does not fit with anything in casca's character up to now. the thought of her sacrificing anyone, and condemning them to the same fate as the hawks, which we know she feels immense survivors guilt about*, would be completely ooc.

i want to hear more from casca's POV about her feelings on her lack of agency as elaine, and now as griffith's captive in falconia, and i do think that reclaiming her agency is hugely important, but doing so by becoming an apostle???

also yeah afaik our understanding of apostles is that their powers are granted by the god hand, of which griffith is a part of, and since she can't even think of the eclipse without going completely catatonic the idea that she'd willingly work with griffith even just to get powers is....... insane. and so sick lol. what kind of rape apologist do u have to be to think that's a positive outcome for her? someone did point out to me that because she's branded, and because miura kind of made up the rules as he went along, maybe she could be granted apostle powers without needing to sacrifice someone through a weird magic loophole LOL but of course that's complete speculation

but yeah i hate the apostle casca theory so much LOL ty for being sane anon

*it's not called survivor's guilt obviously but so far in canon thinking of judeau's death caused a severe ptsd flashback, and in 372 she started crying when the falconia knights reminded her of the band of the hawk, so her feeling distress when remembering her fallen comrades is pretty obvious

[procrastinova]

art summary 2022 vs art summary 2023

individual 2023 artworks below (plus some thoughts on them because why not. Said thoughts will include me critiquing some of the pieces, especially the ones from earlier in the year.)

also here's a link to all the artworks from my 2022 one if anyone wants to see them

JANUARY - Art piece i did right before For the Future aired of Luz and the rest of the hexsquad having a much-needed group hug. I didn't really look at any references for this one (apart from for the character's designs) so the poses look really awkward and stiff tbh 😭. That being said, I'm still glad I gave it a shot, and it looks a lot better than the one I did before Thanks to Them's release, since I was more used to drawing the characters.

I'm not going to go too much into some of the... questionable... anatomy choices I made, since they aren't exclusive to this artwork in particular, nor is this the worst example of them (*cough cough* my old King's Tide screenshot redraw).

Overall I think this is an okay art piece. Definitely could have been improved by actually using references for the pose though.

FEBRUARY - This one is actually another redraw of a REALLY old piece I drew in 2021. With my finger. Not a good combination to say the least. This one is miles better especially in terms of anatomy, facial expressions and composition.

That's not to say that it's without it's flaws. I do think that lining up Betty and Amber's poses better would have improved the overall look of the piece. Another thing that I did end up changing a little while after I drew this was removing the shine from the black parts of the mirror to make it look like it was actually cracked, which I didn't do in the original version (that one's on my scratch account if you want to see it). It's a subtle difference, but I think it makes the piece look a lot better.

Again, I think this is an okay piece overall. Looks like the mona lisa compared to the 2021 version, but honestly I think anything would.

MARCH - Yet another Owl House artwork (bet u guys cant guess what my favourite tv show is). This one I created for a zine which I was working on for my multimedia class (this artwork in particular was supposed to be an advertisement for the finale). You can kinda tell I still wasn't that confident in drawing King, since his pose is pretty stiff (I don't think I ever really got used to drawing him tbh).

I do think this piece would have benefited from some more shading and lighting that wasn't the singular multiply layer I placed over the characters then erased some parts of. (There is some other shading but there's no other lighting).

Most of the other issues I have with this pieces are just issues I have with my old art in general so I'll leave it there.

APRIL - This is the last Owl House artwork I promise. I made this one for Zeez Vov Gee 2's watching and dreaming art contest. I actually do still quite like this one, which might partly be to do with the fact that I really like all of the character's timeskip designs, but whatever.

Some of the proportions on the hands are a bit weird, and I REALLY wish I put the shading on the lineart as well, considering how light of a colour it is.

One thing I do really like which I didn't notice while I was drawing it, is the pose Luz and Amity are in forms a sort of heart shape, which is really adorable akdjfhskhdf ;w;

Anyway, overall a pretty good piece, might remake it later. Who knows 👀

MAY - as you may immediately be able to tell, I did not make that much art in May (I might've had a few tests on at the time. Or I was just lazy). This one is actually OC art for once (wow shocking never seen before).

It's kinda just a doodle/a more doodley art piece, but it's pretty alright. I actually really like the pose that Robyn (the OC in the drawing) is in. This is also kinda the first time I drew their design, so yeah. The background isn't great, but I can't really expect that much from a doodle -v-

overall, pretty decent doodle. (for anyone wondering if I'll ever post more about Robyn... maybe? I'm mainly using their story for writing practice, but I think I posted something from it on here)

JUNE - June was literally the polar opposite of May. I'm not kidding, there were like 3 artworks that I was debating putting for June (this one, some deltarune fanart and a TOH screenshot redraw). I eventually went with this one because HOLY CRAP am I proud of that background.

This one was really heavily influenced by cartoon backgrounds (in particular ones from Gravity Falls and Hilda), and while I do think there are a few things that could be improved (like some of the trees), this was the first time in a while that i'd tried drawing a background that wasn't grass and a couple of trees (and i think the first time ever that i'd done something this complex).

I think another reason that this one turned out so good is that it was a birthday card for a friend. And if there is anything that I am constantly trying to do better at every time I redraw it, it's birthday cards (probably bc they're for my friends, love you guys sm /p).

anyways, overall a really good piece, 11/10 background.

JULY - behold... the first artwork I posted on Tumblr! I drew this shortly after seeing Across the Spiderverse in cinemas (which I have to say was one of the greatest experiences of my life).

I wanted to mess around with lineless art a bit on this one, as well as sort of try to give it a watercolour feel like earth-65. And I gotta say, I think it turned out pretty good. Though I did spend a good 15 minutes looking for references because ATSV wasn't out digitally yet ;w;

overall, I like this piece, I tried something new and I made fanart for the greatest movie of all time (in my opinion)

AUGUST - I don't think I drew nearly enough Omori fanart when I was super into the game, so I'm making up for it now. I wanted to redraw one of my favourite photos from the photo album for this one.

I probably could have put a bit more detail into the background for this one, but I really like the warm lighting, and the dappled light effect that I used for the characters. The lineart is also a bit sketchy, but I was (and sort of still am) in the process of figuring out how I actually want my lineart to look.

overall, I really like this one, nice colours, nice lighting, has the omori characters being happy in it :]

SEPTEMBER - like in May, I didn't get as much Art Stuff TM done, so it's just a doodle of some of my OCS (except this time it's Copper, Lapis and Peg, who I have posted about before).

I kinda just wanted to draw something cozy, so I didn't put too much effort into the background and stuff. One thing I will say, is that I wish I drew them looking a bit older, since they are all 16-17 lol.

overall, this one's ok. Could be better, but it's just a doodle.

OCTOBER - ohohohohoho we are SO back. Yet another birthday card. I love the perspective and poses on this one (because, you guessed it, I used references for them). Everything about this artwork was really fun to draw (especially the characters).

Overall, really good artwork, 11/10

NOVEMBER - redraw of an artwork from 2021 part 2: electric boogaloo. I remember being so proud of the original artwork, so I wanted to make this one an artwork I was proud of too (which was a success).

One of the main things I wanted to do for this one was to actually draw a background, instead of getting one off google. The one I drew was simple, but I think it really works, because I wanted the focus to be on the character, not the background. I also added some slight perspective to the drawing to make it look a bit more interesting.

Overall, amazing, especially compared to the original

DECEMBER - and finally... December's artwork! Aka my banner. I wanted to do something kinda simple for this, because I'm probably going to redraw it or make a new one later. I really like the contrast between the colours in the foreground (which is supposed to be inside a train, but it's kinda hard to tell), and the background.

Also something I've started doing for a few artworks is making a duplicate of the artwork, blurring it slightly and lowering the opacity, which makes it look a lot more visually interesting :0

overall, love this one, good artwork to end the year off with :] (i'll prolly still draw more stuff tho)

(fun fact - I was going to put the redraw I did of the 'get in loser we're going shopping' scene with the characters from TMC for December because it's the highest quality meme i've ever made but it looked weird next to the other ones bc it was in black and white 😭)

[inigostears]

UGH WAIT can we PLEASE get more info on vivianne??? im so interested

HEHE YES OFC

i have a whole ass google doc HERE that goes a lot more into detail about her. it's not, like. 100% complete or anything, but she's been in the works since like, before the ashen wolves DLC came out LOL

here's an old ref (done in like, late 2019 i think? maybe early 2020? i need to do an updated version LOL) :

to summarize her:

vivianne is a part of the golden deer house! she and her family live in deirdru.

so before yuri and the rest of the ashen wolves came along, i had originally written (and still will because fuck u intsys this is my real estate) that vivianne has a major crest of aubin! she comes from a once noble family that was the main inheritors of the crest, but she is the first person in many, many years to publicly have the crest. because of this she and yuri are now bffs and no i will not be taking criticism. if intsys is going to do me dirty like this i WILL be cringe and i WILL be free.

vivi's main hobby is blacksmithing! she adores all sorts of weaponry, fighting styles, armor, and even metal accessories. she even made the roses on her head! she is very attentive to the weapons people fight with, and if she were to be in the game, she would give certain characters their own weapons (she creates her own in byleth's). she also made her own armor in her timeskip design! she's a huge nerd when it comes to this stuff, and will absolutely tell you her opinion even if you didn't ask for it.

she's also a bisexual disaster. like, horribly so. she can be quite boisterous but when she sees somebody she finds REALLY attractive? she freezes on the spot. once she gets comfortable, though, it doesn't happen AS often.

she can get INTENSELY focused. be it on tests or blacksmithing. she will literally, unintentionally block everything else out until she finishes something. like, the teachers at garreg mach have just stopped trying to get her to finish a test when the bell rings lol. i wish i had her focus.

and... that's all i can really cram in here without like, spamming and like, going on a huge tangent LOL. but also if any of u also have ocs..... show me...... i beg of u and i swear vivi will become bffs with them!!! >:)

[satorisoup]

hihi lene!! hru? life has been so hectic recently BUT ANYWAYS i saw

i) ur tmnt post speaking of which i love love loveeee tmnt so much:( esp donnie:((

ii) ur shoto art like DUDE UR STYLE IS SO PRETTY I MIGHT CRY I WANT TO CONSUME IT

iii)ur face rev ! ur so PRETTY OMIGOSH I MIGHT CRY (2) ur like an angel!! like,, idk how to describe it i'm not much of a writer outside fics but i'd imagine u to be that one character in a media that no one can hate ! and that's WITHOUT knowing u at all!! ur so sweet youd be the fan favourite forreal!! talk about being gods favourite !! cs u are!!

i tend to ramble a lot im so sorry ><

ALSO I SAW ALL THE TAGS WHEN YOU RB-ED THE BOKUTO FIC AND I ALMOST CRIED AHH UR TOO NICE☹️☹️

anyways, how's life been treating you?? has anything interesting happened recently???

aaaand that's it, sorry for writing this much. im gna sleep now, good night/day/whatever time it is 4 u!

UWAHHHH DARLING HYENA !! (´ᗜ` *) hi hi my love !! ^_^ m’ soso happy to see you in my inbox teehee !! you’re such a delight to talk to !! <3

EEEK OMIGOSH !! A TMNT FAN !! >//< PLS i am soso happy !! tmnt is just the absolute BESTEST !! i wouldn’t be here without it !! <3 and donnie !! he’s my most beloved, isn’t he just the absolute cutest ?? T^T i hold that entire franchise soso dear to my heart !! i could talk about it all day long !! :3

WAHHHH PLS !! T^T YOU ARE TOO KIND !! <3 m’ soso glad you liked it omigoodness !! >_< i’ve been wanting to draw / talk more about mha so i just thought i’d give it a go !! ^_^ THANK YOU SOSO MUCH MY LOVE EEEK !! that means the absolute world to me !! <3

SNIFFLE OMIGOSH !! M’ SOBBING !! T^T m’ soso flattered PLS you are an absolute darling !! <3 m’ blushing and kicking my feet i swear it !! >//< GASPS !! fan favorite ?? SOBSOBSOB MY HEART IS ABSOLUTELY MELTING RIGHT NOW !! you have no idea how much your kind words are makin’ me smile !! :> YOU ARE THE SWEETEST IN THA WORLD HYENA !! THANK YOU SOSOSO MUCH PLS !! ( ˃̣̣̥ᴖ˂̣̣̥ ) i absolutely adore you !! <3

EEEP pls don’t cry teehee !! T^T you deserve all tha love !! the bokuto fic was absolutely PRECIOUS !! i couldn’t of asked for anything better, i was giggling the whole time it was SO CUTE !! it worked soso well with my koene selfship, because in one of me & kou’s timeskip m’ a flower shop owner !! YOU CAPTURED IT ABSOLUTELY PERFECTLY !! <3 your characterization and writing is soso adorable hyena, THANK YOU SOSO MUCH FOR WRITING IT FOR ME !! >//< congratulations again on 200 followers !! m’ soso excited to continue to watch your blog grow !! <3

SOBSOB life has been oki recently !! ^_^ i’ve just been workin’ and having a little bit of trouble with my managers being unfair but other than that i’ve been good !! :> THANK YOU SOSO MUCH FOR ASKIN’ MY LOVE !! <3

UWAHHH also also, you don’t have to apologize for writing a lot / rambling !! i don’t mind one bit !! <3 i absolutely LOVE talkin’ to you, you can say as much as you’d like !! the more the better teehee !! <3 DONT WORRY !! i promise it’s perfectly oki with me !! >//<

TEEHEE how are you doing hyena ?? m’ soso sorry life has been hectic for you recently, m’ hoping things get better for you soon !! T^T have you watched the new blue lock movie ?? I MUST KNOW !! you are an absolute star in the night sky !! m’ sending you all of my bestest wishes & givin’ you soso many smoochies !! MWUUUAH !! <3 🍓

[seiwas]

SEL!!! WAAHHHH IM SO SORRY FOR DISAPPEARING IMPROMPTU AFTER THE PAPA SHOUTO AND PAPA KATSUKI ASK 😭😭😭 i got so sucked into exam season and family gatherings that I didn’t get a chance to respond 🥺 but you wrote them so perfectly 🥹🥹💓

before I get i to it, I really hope youre doing well!! i saw that you’ve been busy with work and i think you said you had a bit of a health scare so i hope you’re resting and that its nothing serious 🫶🏼 Make sure to take your breaks and stay hydrated!!

now, papa shouto 🥹 i love love love that baby sho has his blank stare ahjfjd in my mind its shouto’s little head tilt as a baby and his icy snot bubbles HAHAHA. i love that he gives him his freedom!!! its so important to him for his baby to have im so 🥺🥺🥺🥺

and papa katsuki!!! you are so right with the “if-it-happens-it-happens kinda thing”. i love that she had the “worst” (quotations because i don’t think they’re necessarily bad they make him who he is and i adore him) of his childhood (aka the stubbornness, chaos, need for autonomy) but its why he knows how to deal with his daughter a million times better WAAAAAAHHHHHHSHSHJDNFJF im so emotional

also!! did you hear about the haikyu timeskip being animated?? right now im ignoring everything that could go wrong with it and appreciating that the grass is green and the sun is shining and tje butterflies are happy and-

take care sel 🫶🏼

-🍧 nonnie

🍧 nonnie hello 🥹 sorry for the super late reply!!

pls dont apologise abt disappearing omg 😭 it’s perfectly fine 🥹 life happens and we get busy!!!!

work has been busy for me yes 🥹 and thank you for the well wishes!! the health scare wasn’t anything serious thankfully 🥹 i hope you’re taking your breaks and keeping hydrated as well!

and baby sho yes !!!!! icy snots pls thats so cute 😭😭😭 i love the image of them both staring at you like 🧿👄🧿 HAIBZJZ THO THIS FEELS MORE LIKE GOJO BUT U GET WHAT I MEANNAISBNS

and yes!!! katsuki w an equally as loud baby as he is 😭 i love playing with the idea of katsuki doing things right yk??? like doing things differently from how it was done to him

AND YES. I HEARD SBT THE TIMESKIP BEING ANIMATED IM TRYING SO HARD NOT TO RAISE MY EXPECTATIONS BUT AKZNKDJ WHEN IT DROPS IM GOONG TO GO SOOOOO INSANE U CAN BET WAHHHH

i hope youre taking care too!! how are you these days? 💗

[misqnon]

IM SORRY FOR PLANTING THE IDEA IN UR HEAD THAT I WOULD TRY TO DECEIVE U /GEN

being 14 and stupid is a valid reason. i too was 14 and stupid at one point

i get really jealous when my fav fictional characters get into a relationship (assuming i like them romantically) and so .. best for me to not ship them.. and also best for me to not fall for characters that will get together with someone. loz:totk spoilers but seeing sidon got married actually broke my heart..... i was so sad...

ACTUALLY PHOENIX AND MILES DO HAVE A RIVALRY UR RIGHT.. i dont ALWAYS hate enemies to lovers. but they were friends first.. and then they became friends again. so i think i categorize them differently in my head

kidd becoming king of the pirates sounds pretty impossible to me because.. i fully believe luffy will do it. but i can see how it would happen if like. luffy gets the one piece but doesnt take credit for it or something. i could also kinda see a route where luffy, kidd, and law all reach the end point together

in the world of pirates i guess most can be forgiven. i definitely DO forget abt how awful some characters were so his way of just rewriting them to be nicer ... kinda works..

u might have linked the wrong video bc i dont remember him saying anything about sanji's eyebrow swirl. maybe i wasnt paying enough attention,, i do think i like partially noticed that oda's signature has sanji's eyebrow swirl but ... yeah that is VERY telling

"and i want to beat him to death with hammers . who said that" LMAO i can relate..

AGHH U WORDED IT SO WELL.. "zoro is boisterous." YES HE IS... UR SO RIGHT.. like he has a lot of quieter moments post timeskip but when hes loud hes LOUD,, i watched episode 2 which is the buggy episode (idk if he shows up later or not) but i did Not Hear the fuck... i mustve filtered it out. too used to hearing cuss words..

RIGHT, they did a great job with the casting. trans koby is so good..

"GOD I WISH SHE WAS REAL" ME TOO

"thank you for showing me!! :D" <3 :)

i found out google had a record of a bunch of accounts that used my email with passwords that mightve been compromised. like . i found that a while ago. but i couldnt log into any of the accounts because . well probably because they WERE compromised. and half of it i was just like ... i dont remember this.... im just living my life with probably a million accounts on various websites that have been stolen. actually my og minecraft account from when i was 9 was stolen.. it was heartbreaking.

THAJK U i will enjoy. i will.

gasp . i.. that is very sweet of u to offer, thank u. my music taste is honestly really hard to pin down i think.. from what i have gathered from other people

"I FUNDED IT" YOU DID!!

"some people have said it seemed fake/forced" noo 😭😭. iñaki seems too genuine for that. i fully believe he was actually that excited. i think he just kinda has that awkward... dare i say autistic... energy. so his interactions with people probably seem forced no matter what. i am just speculating though

was it the zosan comic because i had seen that on my own timeline like 5 times already before u reblogged it LOL

genuinely i think its just because i have dissociative amnesia ahjdhs. but i do think its a funny story to tell people... like yeah... i forgot....

my gender evolution has been genderfluid -> cis girl -> genderfluid -> cis girl -> genderfluid -> cis girl -> trans man? -> trans man who uses he/they pronouns -> transmasc -> nonbinary/transmasc (i usually say nonbinary)

and now i am questioning my gender again. the grind never stops 💪🔥🔥

i say im non binary bc i . gave up. like i am so sick of trying to figure it out ... ill just use the biggest umbrella term.

i do remember that guy who keeps showing up on the sbs for his extremely perverted questions about women... and i would actually send in a question for the sbs but I don't know japanese and he doesnt answer questions that arent in japanese. or so i have heard. i could use a translator though so maybe im just making excuses

it IS a bop.. thank u for the context i heart when ppl tell me things so im not confused. i havent seen rupauls drag race.. i did mean to at one point and then i .. forgot about it

"I USE THAT SAME PHRASE A LOT AND ACCIDENTALLY DO THAT SAME THING EVERY TIME LMAO" IM SO GLAD IM NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO DOES THAT AHJDS

OH PERFECT. MAGISTRATE OF SANJI!!! u get to sit in a courtroom full of sanji fans and judge ace attorney style cases

u havent even gotten to the death pact though have you?? LMAO

YES perfect. i agree its probably just cuz oda wants them to be more intimidating but thats not an interesting reason to me .. i want canonical reasoning behind the heights

"bisexuality of man or whatever" is so funny ..

i like dofuwani too but yeah i think they only really interact during marineford?? i think listing out what ships i like would be hard cuz i LIKE a lot of them but dont Care About most of them.. i care about shuggy.. and recently sanuso.. and ofc hanyagellan. i think thats it tbh. im way more likely to care about characters themselves rather than ships.

"im ngl hannyagellan is like a funny joke ship to me but if it becomes one of those crack ships u acciddentally get attached to im gonna be so mad (i wont be mad itll be really funny)" this is pretty much how i feel... like i was joking and i think its turning into . not a joke... i think im starting to be serious.....

i also miss kuina. like she barely appeared but she has such a big impact.... i wish . she. hadnt died. also i think about how her father's last words to her might have been that she can never be the strongest swordsman, because she was born female. i hate that guy... (her dad). i have seen people say her dad killed her or something and i dont like that theory. first of all i dont think her dad is evil like that. i think hes just your regular sexist dad lmao. but also i feel like it cheapens the impact of her death.

this panel is so good and. like. idk i feel like him realizing that humans are inherently weak is so important to his character.. thats why he protects weak people. because he sees his childhood friend in them. or thats my theory anyways,,

somewhat unrelated but i have always been amazed that people can imagine amvs/animations/stories while listening to music. like my aphantasia isnt that bad but HOW... doesnt the music block out all your thoughts... thats what it does for me...

ur probably right that it really was a gender thing im just.. huffing copium. im coping. i cant handle the reality that he might also be a sexist jerk

i think seeing plays is fun but being part of the production is way more exciting. i love getting to see all the behind the scenes work and like. i like being able to work with my hands a lot. and when i was spotlight for a few shows . that was so exciting. this is kinda lame but i get chills super easily from watching things (idk how else to explain this. chills. goosebumps. because im excited.) so whenever i would watch the shitty high school theatre productions we did i was still like. so proud of all the work that went into it. and i got chills every show. most of the time i didnt get to watch the show though because i was moving things on and off set. watching plays on youtube is so real.. i watched uh.. "natasha, pierre, and the great comet of 1812" on youtube. it was still very fun to watch. but yeah in person will always be better

NO i agree i dont rly think of robin as a mother either. i honestly dont like putting the parent role onto any of the older straw hats.. like why cant they just be cool older friends. an older person and younger person dynamic doesnt always have to be parent and child. i cant find the video but have u seen that video on youtube that has a bunch of sanji mother moments... its so cute..

ateez and stray kids were my favorites!!! not sure how familiar u are with kpop .. slang?? but i was ot8 for ateez (as in i liked everyone) and with stray kids changbin was my favorite. i still love them but they arent my hyperfixation rn. i was into bts when i was uhhh.. 12??

the video u sent seems fun and i will watch it after i finish this!!

*points* zosan liker.. /lh. i have seen quite a bit of themetalhiro but idk if im following them or not!! the other ppl i am not familiar with so yippee new content

i have plenty op thoughts i can share!! im honestly not good at asking questions so i tend to just say things n hope whoever im talking to can jump off whatever i say,,. i try to stay away from anything spoilery ofc but so many of my thoughts r spoilery... which is why i havent been throwing them all at u. and also some (a lot) of them are just .... law centered..... and ... u dont like him like i do... (which is fine ofc) i just dont wanna be annoying JSHRJ

ok this isnt really a theory or anything like that but i keep wanting to tell people about this and i am barely restraining myself so . i will tell u. ace sabo and luffy are called the asl brothers right? and ace... died.. my brothers and i also have the initials asl. or we did. but my deadname starts with an a.... my deadname and ace have something in common (theyre both dead).

thats not really anything but i just find it to be a very interesting coincidence . i like to think about it.

ok heres an actual thought. sorry if it sounds awkward. some of this would be spoilery so i will just not include it but. pirates are all about dreams. they have big, lofty goals that they dont usually tell people about, probably out of shame and embarrassment. in sabaody it is hinted that kidd and killer told people that they were going after the one piece, and they were laughed at for it. not many pirates are like luffy, who proudly proclaims that he will be king of the pirates and find the one piece.

i find it really interesting that crocodile is hinted at having had a dream that was only possible through taking over alabasta. and enel's dream was to get to the "endless varse", even after being defeated he still headed towards his dream. he just ended up going alone. big mom's dream is a utopia where every race can live peacefully together. they all are willing to do awful things for the sake of their dreams.

but again, the difference between luffy and these other people and their dreams is that luffy is not hurting people in the pursuit of his dream. he isnt causing a bunch of people to suffer. in fact, he is doing the opposite. he has continuously been shown to free people from their oppressive rulers, and he crushes the dreams of those who are willing to sacrifice innocent people to achieve their goals.

i dont really have an end point to this but i think that the differences are kind of proof that luffy is going to actually succeed. because he is good at heart. because he doesnt kill people for the sake of his dream. and also i pity the people he defeated. like yeah theyre awful. but i cant help but wonder what crocodile wanted. i cant help but think about what kind of circumstances led them to that point in their life

uhm uhmm yeah... i will think of questions to ask u.. so that u dont have to worry about asking Me questions..

"also p.s. there is never any pressure to watch any of the videos i link it is more for a sourcing purpose unless u actively want to watch them" i watched them anyways!! but i rly appreciate this .. tbh, usually i wont watch something when someone asks me to (pda autism perhaps), but when u say theres no pressure im like "oh. ok. that means i can do whatever i want.." and then i end up watching it most of the time. bc i am curious.

sanji is such a mess... i love that first image what a goofy face . i wish i could send videos through asks cuz i have.. a video from the 4kids dub saved.. that i think is funny... maybe i will send it another way. but alas. i will give u this instead.

CAN’T BELIEVE U WOULD SO SUCH A THING!! /j

NO FR I ACTUALLY LIKE YONA BUT. NOOO THEY MARRIED OFF MY MAN!!!!

i felt similarly when they almost married off sanji. but i really like pudding too. also hey why the FUCK did they make her 16-!!! (will never not be mad about it. they'd be kinda cute together if she wasnt tbh!!)

yea i assume the theories that are like “buggy will find the one piece first” or “kidd will become pirate king!” all assume luffy will do it in the way that matters. i COULD see the worst gen trio reaching it together but part of me really wants all the strawhats there when luffy finds it 🥺

i absolutely couldve linked the wrong video its been a while since i watched it lmao SORRY U SAT THROUGH A SANJI VIDEO FOR NOTHING

okay but regarding zoro THIS VIDEO IM IN THE MIDDLE OF WATCHING SO I KNOW ITS THE  RIGHT ONE. around 25 minutes in he starts discussing opla zoro’s issues and at 26:12 he brings up a little zoro recipe card that is exactly what we’ve been saying HAHA and dw u didnt miss the fuck its later on in the season.

all these stolen accounts….all around me are familiar faces…worn out places…..

i dont think inaki gives the impression of being autistic but with english being his second language he may just have that slight hesitation of understanding his brain working out the the english (and this is just ME suspecting and i could be totally off base) but especially in the oda video where everything oda says is translated through japanese to english but his first language is spanish kvnkd. i dont mean to imply i think hes bad at english or anything but when ppl say stuff to me in spanish (which i took for a few years) i always have to mega process it in my brain first

“was it the zosan comic” [hangs my head in shame] m..m…..maybe.,

A DIFFERENT IRL FRIEND OF MINE (who is very asexual, for reference) GOT A TUMBLR WITHOUT TELLING ME AND HAD BEEN FOLLOWING ME AND I HAD PREVIOUSLY TOLD HIM “YEA U SHOULD GET A TUMBLR BUT DONT WORRY ABOUT FOLLOWING ME U PROB WONT LIKE WHAT I POST HAHAHA….WHEN I FOUND OUT HE HAD BEEN FOLLOWING ME I WAS SO. EMBARR5ASSED. ALL MY ONE PIECE YAOI…AND VAMPIRE HORNY…ON FULL DISPLAY…I WAS LIKE PLEASE TELL ME YOU’RE FILTERING THE CONTENT . I NEED U TO PUT “ZOSAN” ON UR FILTER ASK DONT ASK ME WHAT IT MEANS,

your gender just “i forgor..”

LMAO THE GENDER QUESTIONING GRIND. WE ARE ON IT TOGETHER MY BROTHER. mine was like. cis girl -> demigirl -> still demigirl but casually bc i kept forgetting -> questioning?? -> genderfluid?? or bigender?? is where i currently am at. 

I REMEMBER THAT GUY… SHOO..SHOO

he has mentioned a couple questions as being from overseas, but idk if they were sent in english originally and translated or what. we could Try

so to be fair i have only seen one season of drag race (i think it was 7. the one with kim chi) but i watch trixie and katya a lot so i absorb their knowledge. i really like drag. i kinda wanna try it someday 🧍

“OH PERFECT. MAGISTRATE OF SANJI!!! u get to sit in a courtroom full of sanji fans and judge ace attorney style cases” i literally. feel like i know exactly how this would go.

DUDEBROS WHO THINK HE’S COOL: [BANGS GAVEL] GUILTY

PPL WHO THINK HIS TREATMENT OF WOMEN IS PERFECT AND RESPECTABLE: [BANGS GAVEL] GUILTY

EIICHIRO ODA: [BANGS GAVEL] GUILTY

WOMEN WHO THINK HE’S A PATHETIC MEOW MEOW: [BANGS GAVEL] innocent

GAY PPL WHO PLAY WITH HIM LIKE TOYS: [BANGS GAVEL] innocent

(for legal reasons (haha get it) this is a joke bc all of these have nuance too them ofc. i think he’s very cool sometimes. but other times he is a LOSER. and . i guess i should give oda credit for like. making him,)

I HAVENT GOTTEN TO THE DEATH PACT YOU’RE VERY CORRECT BUT HEAR ME OUT: …THE ZOSANERS TALK ABOUT IT A LOT AND IT SOUNDS COMPELLING,

I LIKE SHUGGY. I WOULD LIKE CROSS GUILD AS A POLY SHIP MORE IF IT DIDNT FEEL MEAN WITH HOW OFTEN THEY BEAT UP ON BUGGY AND ALSO BC I THINK BUGGY BELONGS WITH MR. RED HAIR. the dynamic of shanks being desperate and pining over buggy while buggy thinks he hates him/knows but still hates him. is so funny. i love a onesided ship tbh

OH NO BRO….HANNYAGELLAN…ITS HAPPENING…

kuina gives me a lot of feelings. i love her and everything she stood for. and her time with us as the audience was so brief but we remember her too. i like thinking about what she could have been if we got to see her grown up bc she was such an awesome kid. to influence someone like zoro too. and yea koshiro seems generally pretty cool but that was FUCKED UP and im gonna be mad about it forever. i’ve also heard that “falling down the stairs” in japan can be a way of getting around saying it was a suicide and when i first got into the fandom that was compelling to me but now i dont like it bc. she wouldnt have done that. she made her promise with zoro. she was probably feeling more hopeful about her dream than ever. but then…one small accident and she’s gone. it fucks me up :/ it fucked ZORO up. ive never made the connection that thats why he protects weak people…ah . i think to me kuina made a promise, and zoro takes promises very seriously. he’s very blunt in that he takes things at face value and so a promise is an ironclad thing. i dont think hes stupid and cant tell when someone is being deceptive but i think he thinks deception in that way is kind of unhonorable. 

IF I MAY in one of my fics i set aside part of a chapter (titled zoro alone. hehehe atla reference) and wrote this about zoro and kuina. its very simple and doesnt dive deep but i like it 

“Zoro looks up from his walk along the path. Even in the near afternoon sun, the forest and its surroundings are grayish from the fog. Something snaps a twig. He glances over and spots a buck hopping through the forest in the distance. 

Dreams. Ambitions. Drive. Do what that day stole from Kuina. Defeat Dracule Mihawk. Become the world’s greatest swordsman- for both of them. They’re lofty goals- but he can achieve them. There’s no use in doubt or regret. 

He finds himself in the clearing. That same damn clearing from the first night. In fact, if he looks closely, he can still see the imprints of his boots, paced in circles in the dirt. It’s infuriating. This isn’t a good sign for his current navigational endeavors. Nonetheless, he perseveres, heading the way he remembers Sanji to have taken them yesterday.

Kuina. He doesn’t think of her as often as some might think. He doesn’t dwell on the past, only reflects on it. Today he is reflecting. The day he waited for Kuina by the lake, only for Koushirou to come instead. There’s been an accident, he’d said. She’s gone, he’d said. She’d been sick. She’d tripped. She’d fallen down the stairs. 

Zoro remembered how they’d overworked themselves the day before, training together. He had some childish thoughts that day. Impulsive and hurtful. He tried not to have those anymore. He instead wanted to focus on achieving what they had set out for themselves: their promise.”

i am always imagining amvs in my head to music. i make ANIMATICS in my head to music. but do i ever actually make those things….no. i do not

as a sanji liker i am huffing copium everyday. dont worry. dont worry about it. [streteches out my hand] lets take ibuprofen together

i get chills during performances too!! its just. SO COOL!!!! TO SEE PEOPLE ACT WITH SUCH PASSION AND PORTRAY EPIC STORIES..RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!! LIVE!! AH!!! THOSE BITVHES IN THE SHAKESPEAREAN ERA HAD A POINT

i agree actually! theyre a family but not literally. the mothering some of them show is just cute. and um YES OF COURSE ive seen the sanji mother moments video. god esp pre ts he was so damn cute sometimes 😭 im reading ur message and seeing some of ur posts now and i just feel like this 

“u like sanji now dont u rowan”

i think for ateez my friends favorite is seongwha…and my other friend’s bias in ateez is…i dont remember actually,

I LIKE LAW!!! LAW ME UP!!! IM THE MAGISTRATE AFTER ALL!!!! ksjncdkj no but really he isnt one of my ABSOLUTE FAVS but i really like him!! and after corazon…….law is just very compelling ok. i saved the hawaiian shirt comic to my phone as well btw. 

omg…rip to ace and also ur deadname i suppose…thats kind of funny. 

about ur thoughts on dreams: i…forgot crocodile had a dream beyond alabasta. i thought he just wanted power bc hes sand and its a sand country so it would be perfect for him. plus the poneglyph. now im really curious…i wonder if it relates to his backstory and the possible trans-ness of it? i mean…hm. the poneglyph was weapon related,...idk . croc backstory when…

and ur right about that! luffy is selfish and he’s not a hero but hes also NOT INTERESTED IN BEING NEEDLESSLY TERRIBLE…bc he’s after freedom and what use is it if u destory the freedom of others while searching for it for yourself? undermines your entire goal

i see ur video and i will respond to it shortly but man i DONT KNOW IF I CAN DO IT. HIS 4DUB VOICE PAINS ME PHYSICALLY

speaking of videos. i have a playlist where i put my fav one piece shits. again u do not have to watch any of these. but feel free to peruse

also HERE’S SOMETHING: the other day my friend asked me what i think the one piece is…and having not even reached joyboy/nika shit yet (i shouldnt know about that but alas. spoilers aplenty on the internet) i was freeballing but:

my friend @ liliflower137 had a crack theory that the one piece should be gold roger’s bug collection and with luffy’s love for beetles and the sense of adventure instilled from that i was like. i actually would not be upset at all if that was the case

so i think it might be related to…joyboy/nika/ the SUN…i think maybe its like a. a hat maybe. thats my guess. sun hat. from the original joy boy. its not a good guess but its all i HAVe

also…why do they call him bartolomeo the cannibal. i swear they didnt say anything about him eating people upon introduction. they just call him that. did i miss something. why is bartolomeo called a cannibal and yet when i, big mom, 

to end here’s a good zoro meme for u 

[luvvatlantis]

Halo! Do u do NSFW? If so I have a request ^_^

Daichi with fem!so who's toes reflexively curl when she enjoys something (typically really delicious food or when she's sore and he gives her a massage) and it jus 🤌 does 🤌 things to him

HQ Sawamura Daichi and Your Toe Curl

A/N: Given my response to this post, I happen do to NSFW. However, I’m not an exclusive or often NSFW writer so don’t expect anything too great. Anyways, thank you so much for your request and I hope I did you idea justice!

Separately, please read the author’s note at the end.

Category: Semi-Headcanon(s), Chaotic Semi-Fluff, NSFW-y

Pairing: timeskip!Sawamura Daichi x fem!Reader

Characters: Sawamura Daichi

Content Warning: Dumbification, Praise, Degradation, f!Oral Sex, Overstimulation, (our boy is horny), Word Vomit, Unedited; (also sorry I kinda strayed away from the point)

Word Count: 384 words

REQUESTS ARE OPEN

SMUT IS BELOW THE CUT OFF!!

Daichi Sawamura is a busy, busy man. Between becoming a cop to keeping up in volleyball, he really doesn’t have a lot of time; for anyone other than you.

And with part of that, Daichi notices every little thing about you. From the way the left side of your upper lip quirks just a bit higher when you smile, to the way your toes curl when you’re experiencing something you enjoy, he tries to note everything he can about his girlfriend.

Why not, you know? She’s the absolute love of his life. He’s practically planned his wedding with you because he is just that far in love. But, that toe curl you do, drives him crazy. Truly, it launches him into a world of thought.

No, Daichi doesn’t have a foot fetish. Not even a little to be clear. But the way you curl your toes when you enjoy your food makes him think about the gorgeous look on your face, which makes him think about kissing you sore, which makes him think about fucking you dumb.

God how he wishes he could fuck you dumb.

So that’s how you got here, riding his cock as he whispers sweet nothings into your ears and kissing up and down your neck. The feeling of his dick against your walls making your toes curl.

“Fuck-, baby just like that.”

By the middle of the night he’s got you cumming on his tongue nth time. Praising you up and down for how pretty you look but at the same time calling you his personal slut.

“You’re so pretty when you can’t get enough of me.”

And by the end of the night he’s fucking his cum back into you. Appreciating the way your toes curl at how good he, and only he, makes you feel. Appreciating the way your tits bounce with every drawn out snap of his hips.

“S-Shit, love,”

The look of absolutely nothing else but his cock on your mind makes him want to keep fucking you senseless. He could kiss the beautiful tears running down cheeks till the end of his days. Those soft babbles coming from your mouth were more than enough to have him fuck you well into tomorrow.

God, if he could, he would fuck your back out again tomorrow.

A/N: Okay first addressing the fic! I don’t think this is too good as for this one I really couldn’t seem to get in a smut writing mood but I hope you enjoyed! Thank you so much for your patience and all the support! <3

Second, please drop a comment if you want to be added to my tag-list as I’m trying one out! Of course, this is more appealing if you are familiar with my content!

Third, my best friend @clueless-ghost posted some “Peacemaker” (HBO Max series) headcanons of mine so go check them out. Ghost might try to start a blog too so look out!

Now the other things I want to address. I’m going to be talking about mental health so if that triggers you, stop here.

I’m sorry I haven’t been able to post as much as I would like for you guys. I have a lot of works that I just can’t seem to write for because I just can’t seem to bring myself to write at all. I’ve struggled with my mental health the majority of my life and even though it wasn’t good when I started my blog it has dropped dramatically since starting it. I received poor news among other things and it just plummeted. I’m trying my best for you all and I am truly grateful for all your support and patience. If you see that I don’t post much or dislike my work it’s just because I’m not doing super great. However, I’m not abandoning you any time soon so please stick around. Thank you so, so much! <3 -ashlynxmylove

Reposts and notes are greatly appreciated. Plagiarism, copying, or creating videos of this work is prohibited. This work belongs to @ashlynxswhore on Tumblr.

[hhawks]

in a world where you could just lie to me

✰ starring: asahi azumane x fem!reader ✰ synopsis: in which asahi tries to say sorry. set post timeskip, ceo of fashion brand azumane asahi hires you to sew for his fashion show. ✰ content: exes that fuck, canon compliant, lots of references to fashion and the fashion industry, bitter reflections on the past, depiction of new york by someone who has never been to new york, kinda angsty but also not quite, kiyoko n yachi are here! along with an oc bc i needed one more person for plot ✰ warnings: thigh riding, fingering, implied exhibitionism ✰ word count: 9.6k (holy fuck u guys) ✰ a/n: HAPPY BIRTHDAY ASAHI the Best character in hq shut the fuck up if you disagree. i love you my anxious anxious man.

part one of red thread series.

“don’t tell me.”

your new intern looks at you, sweat practically pouring down her forehead. “boss, i’m not sure what to say—”

“then don’t speak. get kiyoko on the line.”

mitsuri shuts the door behind her, and you can hear the way she slumps against the door sighing. you don’t mean to be vicious, overbearing. but this is one thing that you can’t let just slide.

you pull your legs up, hoisting yourself up to sit cross legged in your office chair before picking up the phone. “boss, i—”

“you wanna explain to me what you just did? why i just had to hear what i just heard?” you spit down the line. “mitsuri near pissed her pants telling me.”

“look, i think it’d be a great opportunity. for you and the company.” her voice is sweet, as it’s always been since high school. “he’s not the devil. you can work with him for one season, can’t you?”

you scoff, twisting around in your chair. “you want me to work with him? i can barely stand to even look at his name, let alone sew for him for his entire show.”

“boss, he requested you.” the line strikes a chord in your heart, and it pangs against the confines of your sternum. you wish you hadn’t heard that. “he wants you. look, i don’t know where you guys stand now, but think of us. think of the brand. you work with one runway brand and you’ll be a fashion week regular. it won’t just be his brand asking to work with you.”

“kiyoko—”

“think about it.” you hear her sigh. “it’s all up to you, in the end. but i think you’d benefit a great deal from it.”

a beat of silence. you hear mitsuri chattering outside your office door. the squeak of your chair as you lean back. “fine.” you say finally. “i’ll think about it. when do we have to get back to him?”

“he didn’t say, but out of courtesy i’m gonna need an answer by friday.”

friday. you look at your calendar— wednesday now. “okay. you’re really a stick up my ass.”

“just lookin’ out for you,” she laughs. there’s a chord of graciousness in your sternum that beats louder than your fear. “i’m coming in soon. want a coffee?”

it stares you in the face every time you so much as glance at the contract. kiyoko’d laid it on your table, as gently as her slender hands could, almost trying to comfort the worsening wound in your side. it’s not that you didn’t want to take the offer.

it’s that even his name made your heart pound.

asahi azumane. how long had it been since you even heard it uttered? when mitsuri briefed you about it this morning you choked on your spit, thumping your chest to regain control. “what did you just say?” you spat.

it wasn’t her fault. you groan, making a mental note to apologise to her later. but you thought that you could go the rest of your life without meeting him again. that was the plan, wasn’t it? that’s what he said, wasn’t it?

you kick back in your chair, gazing upon the piles and piles of intricate fabric, of reams of satin. kiyoko said that his designs were in the folder— so you pick it up, hands threatening to tremble, and start to flip through.

the drawings— the sketches, the delicate pencil lines, the bold strokes, the light shading, it’s all him. you can’t think of anything else, can’t look past the little asahi’s in the corners of each sketch, his signature to copyright them, can’t stop your fingers from trailing over every line. it’s all him. they’re all reminiscent of his style, extravagantly simple, silks and velvets and leather. everything you remember working with him on.

you don’t realise you’re crying until a tear smudges a corner of a sketch. “fuck,” you mutter, stretching out to grab a tissue from your desk and dabbing it gently so the graphite doesn’t run. they’re beautiful, his designs. always had a knack for being the most creative person in the room.

“asahi,” you test his name on your tongue. it feels awkward, unfamiliar. like you haven’t uttered it in years. you probably haven’t. but somehow the more you say it the more it feels— not natural, but comfortable.

(like a home made by hand, burying deep in your mouth.)

you thumb through the designs. it feels like the first time he designed, you in his lap, making suggestions and talking him through what works with what fabric. the two of you were a duo; went everywhere together, worked together, loved together. his designs now are different, but you can see the little details that you taught him.

fine. you think. we’ll see how this goes.

“kiyoko?” you call loudly. the walls of your office are thin, so you hear her footsteps padding along until she pushes the handle down.

she smiles. “hey boss. what is it?”

your hand moves before your brain does, grabbing a pen from your mug-turned-pen holder, darting to sign big and loud on the contract. “tell azumane i said yes.”

new york is dreadful. you’ve known this from the day you first stepped into rat-infested subway stations, walking down garbage-lined streets. no matter how many times you encounter a cockroach you will always jump and squeal before stomping on it with your shoe.

but for some reason, life always finds a reason to drag you back here. you breathe in the first gust of putrid perfume concoctions and the unmistakable fried food, and you feel the same you did all those years ago. hopeful, filled with some sort of determination. now just without the man who brought you here, your scarf around his neck, his hand in yours.

“he really has god-like faith in you, huh?” hitoka comments when you step off the plane, sewing machines and sergers in hand. “fashion week is in less than a month.”

you hum. “i’ve never really known him to make important decisions well. he works best under pressure.” kiyoko snorts. “anyway, as long as he’s paying us well i don’t mind working long hours. i hope you guys don’t either.”

“‘f course not.” kiyoko heaves the machine against her hip, and hitoka stretches out her hand in an offer to help. she shakes her head. “i mean, we practically already do that with every client collab.”

“when are we meeting mr. azumane?” mitsuri asks, shouldering the duffel bag of necessities.

“you don’t need to call him that,” you murmur. “he hates being called that.”

“tomorrow morning,” kiyoko answers. “and yeah. he much prefers just being called azumane.”

or just asahi, you think. there’s something about that thought that sticks in your head, burrows itself deep into your subconscious. something menacing, yet sweet. you don’t know if you’re dreading seeing him or if you want to sleep now so you don’t have to be awake without him anymore.

he’d scheduled private hire cars for the four of you, kiyoko tells you, to shuttle you from the airport to the hotel that’d you’d be staying at. it takes a while— new york traffic is as bad as you remember— and hitoka falls asleep on your right shoulder, mitsuri on your left.

“they’re exhausted,” you comment to kiyoko, who’s sitting up front. “i haven’t seen them this knocked out since the day after tokyo fashion week.”

“you would be too if it was your first time flying 13 hours non stop,” she hums gently. “they were all cramped up with the machines.”

“poor girls,” you pat their knees softly, watching as the dim orange glow of the streetlamps illuminated their faces with every stretch forward. you’d forgotten what new york night life was like; how rowdy it is, how lively it is. you’d forgotten how tired just being in the city made you.

you’d forgotten that the only reason you’d ever come here was for him.

the hotel is nice. kiyoko tells you his manager was the one who booked it for a couple of nights while you look at other places with enough studio space to make a hundred different pieces. god, he’s really pushing you for time, isn’t he? “what time is the—”

“the office is about a block away, and the meeting’s at eight,” kiyoko says, letting down her hair, black cascading around her shoulders. she’s still the beauty she’s always been, even after a thirteen-hour flight. “so we sleep now so we’re not late, got it?”

and that’s exactly what the four of you don’t do. the japan-america time zone difference is brutal on your body, tossing and turning in your bed until the ungodly hours in the morning. it doesn’t help that your tummy’s churning with the dread of seeing him again, for the first time in what feels like forever. you wonder if his hair’s still the same length, if he’s changed his glasses. you wonder if he’s seeing anyone. god, you don’t know whether it’s better if he is or isn’t.

you lie there, awake, staring at the ceiling. you count the flowers in the wallpaper, you lean on your side and watch the clouds inch by slowly. there’s nothing to rock you to sleep. you wonder if it would be better if he were here, next to you, tucking you into his chest. “fuck,” you mutter, clutching the sheets between your fingers. “fuck you, fuck this. why am i here?”

you’re not sure when today becomes yesterday, when night turns into day. all you know is that eventually slumber overcomes you, and you tuck yourself under the covers for a good hour and a half before the kiyoko-mandated morning wake up call rings, sharp and shrill, from the hotel landline. you groan, twisting over to pick up the receiver.

“hello?”

“good morning, miss!” the voice is way too chipper for— you glance at the clock— 6 in the morning. “this is your morning wake up call. have a wonderful day.”

“you too,” you grumble, slamming the receiver down before stretching out of bed. god, you’re tired. your shoulders are aching and your chest feels heavy, but the new york outside is starting to wake up and you can’t help but shiver from the anticipation of the city. the sun is pulling horizons of pink and orange behind her, taking her place in the sky.

there’s a knock at the door. “boss? you awake?” it’s hitoka, voice small and muffled by a yawn. “we’re going down for breakfast. want us to wait for you?”

you hum, darting across to your bga for your sweater. “i’ll be out in a sec,” you call, and you hear her grunt in affirmation. the sweater is warm, and you pull it over your head and settle into your sneakers. you’d have to wait till later for a shower. pushing down on the handle, cold metal icy in your hands, you’re greeted by three other sleepy girls, eye bags tightly drawn under their eyes, kiyoko’s glasses pushed over her forehead to keep her hair back.

“jet lag, huh?” she mutters, and you all giggle a little.

breakfast is a quiet affair. it’s your typical breakfast buffet, and mitsuri and hitoka pile their plates with pancakes and whipped cream and make fun of kiyoko eating cereal? you have all these fresh cut fruit and meat and you chose cereal?

“it’s healthy.” kiyoko shrugs. “and plus i don’t feel like eating anything else so early in the morning.”

honestly, neither can you. you push around the food in your plate, eventually opting for just sipping the orange juice hitoka so kindly brought for you. there’s something eating away at you that you can’t quite place. is it him? is it the new city? you’ve never seen so many people talk so loudly this time of the morning.

you think about it more when you shower. you can’t help it; it’s all that consumes your mind. what he looks like, who he’s with. you want to see him again, no matter how much you deny it outwardly. there’s a little excitement, a little flame that burns in your palms. you start to remember the way he touched you, how soft his hands are, the tips of his fingers constantly bruised from volleyball. you remember sitting with him every night, applying ointments and wrapping his fingers and kissing them one by one.

“fuckin’,” you spit, digging the heels of your palms into your eyes. “stop thinking about that. stop it.” the shower water beats down, scalding and hissing on your back, rivulets of memories and tears staining your skin. stars explode behind your eyelids, and you let go. your vision is blurry, and perhaps it is best that way.

his office is big. that’s the first thing you think when you walk down the block to the building that kiyoko’s leading you all to. he’s definitely upgraded from the small studio space the two of you had rented when you had first moved to new york, cramped and crowded with your piles of fabric and his stashes of messy sketches.

but you two made it work. fit a small bed in the corner and held each other’s hands as you dozed off to sleep. now you stand at the foot of his building and your heart is in your throat, threatening to spill into words that you can never let see the light of day. but you brave it all, shoulder the past and its vicious tongue and walk inside.

the three of them can practically see the tension rolling off your shoulders as you step into the lobby. your sneakers made contact with unforgiving marble, walking up to the reception. “i’m here to see azumane,” you murmur, and she gives you a look. you can’t tell what it says. you decide you don’t care.

she picks up a phone, mumbling something into the receiver before looking back at you. “he’s expecting you. floor 16.”

you nod graciously. floor 16. that’s high. or is it? you can’t really tell what the standard of new york offices are like; you’d only been here a handful of times, and you barely remember them, always buried nose deep in sewing that you don’t even notice the sun going down. you’re twiddling your thumbs when kiyoko whacks you on the shoulder.

“relax.” she says. “you’re practically vibrating.”

she’s not wrong. you’re shaking, trembling even, but as you enter the elevator and press a knuckle against the ridged button that says, 16, you breathe. you breathe and you calm yourself. you knock against racing tides of your thoughts, still whipping winds.

you’re fine. you’re fine.

when the doors open his name is the first thing you see. you almost scoff at the narcissism, but the company is named after him. you flip your sunglasses up to your hairline, heaving a small sigh.

“you got this,” kiyoko whispers.

you nod. “i know.”

and then you venture into what you’ve only ever dreamt about.

floor to ceiling windows. walls filled with rows and rows of model headshots, little sketches and notes hanging under them. sample pieces, headgear, jewelry. it’s your dream, to run a show like this, and now you’re the part it all hinges on.

people watch you as you walk in. whispers. murmurs. is that the tailor? is it only the four of them? we’re so royally fucked. but you ignore them, following behind your supposed tour guide into the main office.

“azumane-san’s been waiting for you,” she smiles gently, and it does nothing to calm your nerves. you pinch your thighs. “i’ve heard loads about you.”

“oh yeah?” you attempt to laugh, and it comes out in a weak exhalation. you come to a stop in front of a glass door, and inside you can see a wall lined with the same sketches you poured over the last few weeks. in front of it, a dark oak table littered with different fabrics, magazines, several accessories, and a gold-plated name plate.

asahi azumane.

he sees you before you see him. because you’re busy watching the people milling around the room, shifting the weight of your bag on your shoulder. you’re looking, looking, with that look on your face he’s always been so acquainted with. the look of awe, at passion and at activity, the flurry of happening that surrounds you. asahi’s known how much you love just being a part of something.

and then you see him. him, here, really in front of you. he looks tired, a little older, but his hair’s still pulled into the same low bun, long strands framing his face. he looks at you and you look at him, and you can’t begin to explain the calmness that overwhelms you. calm? how are calm? how do you look in the eyes of your haunting nightmares, the shadow that’s tacked to the end of your days and feel calm?

“azumane!” kiyoko and hitoka are moving before you do, rushing up to him. you’d told them to do that; take away the attention from your being there by talking to him first. “it’s been years. how’ve you been?”

sometimes you forget kiyoko and asahi are from the same year too. kiyoko takes his hands in hers, neck craning up to look at him. “you look the same. you’d think you would have gotten a haircut by now.”

he laughs. you forgot how light his laughter was, the way it fills the room. “it’s nice to see you too, shimizu.” his voice is the same, deep ochre spilling into the room, smooth as whiskey. “you too, hitoka.”

and then he looks at you.

“hey.” his eyes are soft. you want to gauge them out.

“hi.”

it’s silent for a while, deafening above the chatter of his subordinates. asahi clears his throat. “can i, uh,” he scratches the back of his neck. “can i talk to you privately? there’re some matters i need to run by you before you can start sewing.”

your blood goes cold. “yeah, sure.” you take a step forward, and he jerks his head to everyone else, a low command to “please take your leave, i’ll call everyone back in a bit.”

“it’s been a while, huh?” you start. you try to fit a small smile on your lips. “you must have been desperate if you called me.”

“the opposite, actually.” he takes a seat at his chair, motioning for you to sit next to him. “you were my first choice.” there’s a hesitance behind his voice, in the way his hand reaches for yours and then stops. he pulls a file towards you, flipping it open. “i take it you’ve already looked through the sketches?”

“yup,” is all you can say. your hands are paralysed by your sides. you don't know if you wish he’d just hold it. “they’re really good. your blazers especially.”

“you think so?” he thumbs through the pages, and you watch the way his hands flex and move. meadows of smooth porcelain, dotted with freckles and moles, silver rings adorning his fingers. your breath hitches in your throat.

he talks over his ideas, his intentions, the way he wants things done. “of course, i’d still love for your input on it,” he smiles. “you know best the way fabric works.”

you hum. “you have a lot of faith in the structure of velvet,” you comment, hand running over his dress sketches. “you might want to use a lighter fabric if you want this level of flow.”

“as i said,” his hand finds its place on the little of your back, and suddenly the two of you feel all too close, all too intimate. but even if he notices the way your body tenses, he doesn’t show it. “you know it best. what other revisions did you think of?” too close, too close. he smells the same, you realise. he’s using the same cologne, the one you first got for him the first christmas you really had money to blow on expensive presents. you were fresh out of high school then.

the hour goes by with the two of you making revisions to his sketches, going through colours and fabrics and “do you want it against the grain? i think the drape would look nicer that way.” asahi listens, nodding along as he always has. you’re his little genius; everything he’s ever done only ever went through you before coming to life. he watches you talk, making revisions in your signature pink pencil, sketching over his designs and making notes.

“i’m taking this home with me, by the way,” you mutter as you thumb through the pages. “you can have my blank copy. i need all the notes.”

he laughs. “thanks for clarifying now,” you pull out your copy from your bag, the one with all your little scribbles during your first revision, and hand it to him. “you haven’t changed a bit.”

what’s that supposed to mean? you grit your teeth, flipping through the pages one last time. “i wouldn’t put money on that assumption.”

it’s silent. he looks at you and you’re looking at your notes, studying the little indents in the paper. there are so many questions you want to ask, so many words you want to speak. so much you have to catch up on, so much skin to explore. you want to, you want to. so what’s stopping you?

“the team’s going out for dinner tonight,” he murmurs, and you can feel his breath against your skin. you shudder. “should i expect to see the four of you there?”

is this his attempt at making things better? is this his attempt at pretending everything’s normal, like he didn’t leave you for dead years ago? you look at him, and his eyes are soft, filled with mirth. curious brown.

“expect the three of them,” you say finally. “i’m going to look over studios so we can start sewing.”

kiyoko is adamant on staying with you that evening, no matter how much you tell her you’re fine alone. “you’re really gonna leave mitsuri and hitoka on their own? in the big city?” you squeal, laughing as she stands over you, refusing to budge.

“well, they can stay too! right? we can go get dinner downstairs.” she turns back to face the younger girls, who just smile sheepishly.

“actually, shimizu-san,” hitoka starts, her thumbs twiddling. “we actually did want to go for dinner.”

you gesture wildly at them, eyes wide at kiyoko. “you can’t deprive them! it’s their first time here.”

kiyoko groans. “i— fine. but we’ll be back right after to make sure you haven’t, i don’t know, died from neglect.”

“i’ll be fine for four hours,” you roll your eyes. “now get out. i have to rake through air bnb now.” the moment the lock clicks behind them you’re back on your computer, leg hitched up on the chair as you scroll through endless studio spaces. normally you’d work in the studio that the collaborator has, but you specifically requested to scout your own despite the price, just so you wouldn’t have to see him all hours of every day.

“isn’t that going to be expensive?” hitoka asked when you briefed them, hands planted by her sides as she sat cross-legged on the chair.

you waved a hand. “they said they’d pay for it. it’s the same if we got our own place than if we’d just used theirs.”

but the challenge comes with having to find a place. you scroll endlessly, looking for somewhere big enough to house four bodies and twice as many machines, piles and piles of fabric and the mannequins his secretary was nice enough to let you take. you gaze at your notes, the little scribbles he’d left you in black, ones you marked in pink. there’s a little inkling in your heart that tells you, maybe it’s different now. maybe he’s really trying to make amends.

this is a pretty expensive way to say i’m sorry, you think, resuming your scrolling on the site. you bookmark some that catch your eye, good hardwood floors, ample lighting, space enough for all of you. it looks like a bigger version of the first place you had rented when you came here, the same high ceilings, the same earthy undertone that you can never seem to find anywhere else.

you look out the window, back in the same state of mind that haunted you years ago, and again just last night, one that had you counting lit windows in the landscape to alleviate that sick sense of loneliness that consumes you. maybe you should have gone for that dinner.

but airbnb pulls you back into their spiral of overpriced studio spaces cloaked in the surrealism of owning property. you’re reminded that this time you’re not alone; you have your colleagues— no, friends who came with you. there’s a quirk in the corner of your lips when you think of them, wide-eyed and mystified as you were walking back from the office, twinkling lights reflecting off mitsuri and hitoka’s gazes. you remember what it was like your first time here.

you were probably the same warm-cheeked, curious girl they are now. your eyes are misty. when did that happen? you run a hand over your face and turn your attention back to the computer, scrolling endlessly. no more distractions. by the time the lock clicks and slowly opens, hushed whispers creaking forth from the gap in the door you’re pressing submit application and leaning back in your chair.

“found one, boss?” hitoka’s voice is small, slightly slurry. you turn to look at them, pink cheeked and smiley, a little dazed. they all are, even kiyoko who’s always been designated driver. so either they walked back, or someone—

“i had to make sure they got back okay.” you hear asahi before you see him, and suddenly you see his kind face loom over the girls. “mitsuri might have had a little too much,” he turns to the smaller girl, arm slung over his shoulder, looking faraway.

you can’t help the snort that escapes you. “jesus christ,” you stand, hurrying over to take mitsuri in your own arms. she grins at you, hair tucked messily into a bun that bumps against your chin. “i hope they weren’t too much to handle.” the girl in your arms shoots you a look of incredulity. you ignore it. “i’ll have to have a talk with these two. and you,” you shoot kiyoko a look. “you didnt monitor them at all?”

kiyoko raises her arms as if in surrender. “hey, i was busy catching up with my old friends.” something about that line makes your heart sting just a little. you wonder who was there, which friends who you cut off after you and asahi split. you think maybe nishi was there; you know he’d been travelling the world, but knowing his closeness to asahi during high school, he’d definitely be in town for the show.

so you shake your head and smile at them, and manage a hasty grin up at him. “thanks for walking them back,” you say, and it feels genuine.

“it’s no problem.” asahi scratches the back of his neck awkwardly. “i wanted to come and— well, say hi to you too i guess.”

you blink slowly. “oh.” your tongue darts out of your mouth to wet your suddenly-dry lips and find words that have seemed to slip right through your teeth. “well, hi.”

he smiles. you wonder how many girls (and guys) he’s smiled at like that since you broke up. it’s annoying really, how much you think about things like that. almost like you’re still not over him, obsessing over every detail, every insinuation that he had any more of a life outside of his relationship with you.

(you’re not over him, you realise quickly.)

but then you smile back at him and it fills you with a strange feeling of calmness. a beat passes and you’re still looking at him, your eyes sketching over the fine lines of age and wisdom that he’s undertaken, the softness in his eyes akin to that of when you were in school. there are a lot of memories you subconsciously repressed when the two of you broke up. but one you never failed to remember was just how comforting it was to be looked at.

“have you found a place?” he asks, voice low. it shakes you out of your reverie and you blink twice before it registers in your mind what he said.

“oh— yeah. yeah i have. do you wanna see? i feel like i shoulda ran it past you before applying, but—” you shrug, a small smile daring on your lips. “i guess it’s too late now.”

he laughs with you, taking a tentative step into your hotel room. it feels like a line being pushed, a safe haven broken into, but you allow it to happen. you turn the laptop so it faces him, all the apartments you sent applications to in on the screen. “you know,” he starts. “the office studio is still open if you wanna use it.”

“i know,” you murmur.

it’s quiet between the two of you as he scrolls through the specs, nodding and muttering along. “i like this one,” he says, and you crane your head to look. “nice lighting. hardwood floors. it’s nice, kinda looks like a bigger version—”

“of our first apartment,” you chime in, a small smile tightening on your lips. “that’s exactly what i said when i saw it.”

asahi leaves not long after that. after he smiles at you, the smile soft quirk that tugs at the corner of his mouth and soft brown eyes that make you want to slap him, telling you that that apartment was perfect, and if you could get it just to send him the rent details. you both look at each other for just a beat too long before he shuts the door behind him, and you don’t realise how tense you are until you breathe.

your posture collapses, every huff of air in your body escaping. the chair creaks under your weight and you hear a stifled giggle behind you, and that’s when you remember you aren’t alone in your room.

“right,” hitoka begins in a botched british accent, swaying in her spot on your bed. “what’s all this then?”

the three of them rupture into giggles and you throw the nearest cushion you can reach at them. “i’ll kill you girls.” you murmur. “it’s your fault he even came here!”

“that was the plan,” mitsuri slurs, laying atop hitoka’s thighs, her skirt riding up just a little bit. “ wanted to see what you two would say if you saw each other.”

“the plan?”

“they asked azumane to walk them home,” kiyoko mumbles, half asleep on her side of your bed.

“you what?” you lurch forward onto the bed, collapsing on top of the two smaller girls, digging your fingertips into their flesh. there isn’t a hint of malice in your breath, none as you hover over their faces and huff, “you did what now?”

“it was hitoka’s idea!” mitsuri screeches through giggles. “not mine, i swear not mine, st-stop!” but you don’t listen, revelling in their laughter and kiyoko’s soft smile on the other end of the bed.

it’s moments like these that make you grateful for the people you work with. you’d been together as a small company for years now, but it was long haul trips and sharing the same bed that made it feel less like work and more like adventures. some kind of bliss behind every door you opened together, wrapped in twinkling night lights and the new york city skyline. you sit back on your haunches as their laughter dies down, and you watch them, teary eyed and red cheeked. i’m glad i’m here with you guys.

but you’ll never say it. instead you watch them doze off, make up still running down their cheeks. kiyoko’s half asleep too, so you shuffle to the bathroom for baby wipes and micellar water, cleaning their faces gently. hitoka’s black mascara and kiyoko’s red lip and mitsuri’s brown eyeliner, wiped and balled up in a wet tissue and thrown away.

and when you stand back and let that deep silence envelope you, there’s an inkling at the back of your neck you can’t quite qualm. one that calls you to a place you spent times just like these in; hours of the night in the suspension between real and fake, where you’re alone but not really. when all you can hear is people but none of them are talking to you. so you put on your jacket and you step out the door, letting it click behind you.

new york’s surprisingly gentle at night. maybe it’s where you’re staying, but as you walk, hands shoved in your pockets not because it’s cold but because it’s strangely comforting to be buried in thick fabric. in deep pockets that envelope you whole, that hold you steady in a country so familiar yet so foreign, places that look just slightly off, road signs you remember the words of but not where they are. something about stiff yet broken in denim, or soft corduroy makes you feel safe, a thick velvet or moleskin. it’s running through your head while you take the walk you’ve always walked, the pavements your heavy feet wear upon start to become familiar.

there was a park that you and asahi went to sometimes on your first trip here. by accident, the first time, and then deliberately every time following. you’d found it one night walking back to your home, ice cream in one hand and his hand in the other, giggling and tripping over your feet. it was your first time in new york, who could have blamed you for being in love?

the trees sway with the gentle breeze. it’s september, the end of summer, the beginning of a new end, when the heat dies down just enough that it warrants a jacket. you remember the first time you were here; it was colder, the early days of january, blowing out the candles on asahi’s cake before boarding the plane. it was such a stupid decision, really; one you hadn’t thought out as much as you should have, but it was alright. because all you had was two suitcases, a jacket, a machine and asahi next to you in the january cold. the leaves gather at your feet, illuminated by the hazy orange lamplight, little shadows dancing along pavements.

there was a bench— there is a bench, that the two of you found the first time. etched your names in the splintering oak and kissed messily under the silvery gusts of moonlight. just up ahead, you remember, shaded by foliage and mimosas in patches of eroded sand. you’re just about to round the corner that takes you there, plop yourself in the worn seat when you stop.

there’s somebody already there.

normally this would have been fine. you know, it’s a public park, a tuesday night in new york. public benches are free reign for anyone who wants them. but not this time. you recognise that jacket, that hair let loose over his shoulder, the soft voice humming a familiar tune. you recognise it all, and it burns deep in your stomach, acid coiling and curdling. confusion or excitement froths in your throat, and a part of you pushes forward, a part of you pulls back.

“how is she?”

and you freeze. nothing moves. it feels like time itself has stopped, the leaves have stopped shaking, the autumn night is still. all there is you, him, and that detached voice who sounds so groundbreakingly familiar. high pitched, energetic, just a smidge of reminiscent.

“she’s—” asahi sighs. sputters. “she’s just as much of a spitfire as she’s always been.” you can hear the smile curving into his mouth, head turned ever so slightly to face whoever he’s speaking to.

you don’t stay to find out who it is. you turn on your heel and you leave, a breath caught between its way in and its way out. your head swims, and the lights begin to blur together. pavements sewn into the soles of your feet take you back to the hotel, back into your bed where the three other girls have barely moved.

the night wastes away and you let it. because in your heart, your rotting heart, something has begun to bloom. and you don’t want it to. you wished new york would stay dead to you.

but you fell in love here once.

(and now you’re doing it again.)

ONE MONTH TO FASHION WEEK

“a hundred and four.”

“yup.”

“in like, twenty seven days.”

“mmhm.”

“and we’re getting paid, how much again?”

“about fifteen thousand dollars.”

hitoka sputters. “only?”

you laugh, hands fitted on your hips as you take one last look at the board, every piece of clothing due for fashion week pinned up and notes written. “actually, less than twenty seven days. we’ll be doing fittings as soon as we finish so we can get them altered. mitsuri,” you call over your shoulder, who shuffles up to you with a small grin on her face. “you’re in charge of the alterations once they come in. it should be small, button relocations, maybe a extra inch or two off a seam. as long as we keep to our schedule,” you breathe, the large calendar right next to the board pinpointing every single hour of every single day. “we should be fine.”

THREE WEEKS TO FASHION WEEK

asahi comes to visit every day.

he knows the schedule by now. every day you are finishing at least a piece and a half each. morning till night at the cutting board, rotary blades dulled and then replaced, hand cramping from the sheer amount of velvet you’ve had to cut, sewing machines oiled and gears cleaned.

mitsuri has each model come in a day for a fitting, taking measurements of what needs to be changed, a pair of thread snippers on her belt for loose threads someone’d forgotten to trim. then back to the chopping block in her own corner, the pile of fabric growing larger each day.

you’re on schedule. you make sure you are. kiyoko’s one of the most type-a people you know, but you’re the one picking up the slack when everyone else has gone to lunch.

and that’s when he comes in. with a to-go bowl of whatever he’s chosen for you, burrito bowl, poke, acai, ramen. and he sits with you, helping with small hand stitches as you handle the big renovations, making sure you eat and drink water.

“you shoulda asked me to start earlier, dumb fuck,” you murmur to him one day.

“i only had the designs finalised the day i sent them to you,” he laughs, threading maroon thread into a size 9 needle. your personal favourite was 10, but it didnt make much of a difference. “i asked you as early as i possibly could.”

“that’s bullshit,” you huff. “you have all year to plan fashion week and you finalise your designs a month and a half before the event?”

“well,” he leans in closer to you. “i work best under pressure.”

you swat him away, your cheeks burning. “yeah well, i don’t.” you lift your foot off the pedal, snipping the thread off the dress before holding it up with your hands. “what do you think?” holding it up in your hands, it falls elegantly down in ripples of crushed velvet, a sea of maroon draped just the way you like it. “number 34.”

“it’s perfect,” he looks at it, eyes wide and bright. “you’re a fuckin’ magician.”

you chuckle. “no, i’m just a seamstress.”

you don’t ask why he was at the park that night. you don’t ask who it was he was with. because it doesn’t matter. spitfire. spitfire. spitfire. that’s what you had been called your whole high school career— the feisty little girl with the ember tipped tongue, subdued by the gentle giant from the volleyball team. you’d died down since then, hadn’t you? just as much as she’s always been. have you?

but then you’re taking the dress to the racks and leaving it to be ironed, glancing at the pinboard again for the original design. your hands work magic on the machine, but it was from his mind, his ideas. they had never failed to leave you speechless, even just as tiny sketches.

“you bring them to life, you know?” his voice pierces through your reverie, and you drag your gaze from the board to him. “it may be my ideas, but they’re useless till they touch your hands.”

“well, i wouldn’t have anything to sew if it wasn’t for your ideas.”

“then we need each other, don’t we?” you don’t notice you’re gravitating back to him in small steps, like you’re levitating across the room. “i need your hands. you need my ideas.”

“that’s the way it’s always been.” you agree, no matter how much you choose to deny it. and then suddenly you’re in front of him, standing between his legs, neck craning down to look at him. “it’s always been you and me.”

asahi nods. asahi agrees. asahi looks at you like you hung the stars and carved the moon from the shell of the nebulas, and his hand, big and warm and lovely, comes up to cradle your cheek.

how do you find it in you to look back at him? how do you find it in yourself to let him touch you again, be so close to you in a room alone? why does this feel like years ago, when it was just the two of you in a shoebox apartment, the same set up of machines and sergers and pinboards against a wall?

and how do you find it in you to ask, “why did you leave me?”

asahi doesn’t answer. he looks at you, mirth melting in his dark eyes, and kisses you. reaches up and pulls you down and you let him, let him consume you and you consume him, stealing each other's breath and words and blood and minds. he’s warm, so warm, smells like his cologne, spicy, woody scent that you gave him, that you made for him. it feels like everything he’s ever been is made for you.

and by the way he’s holding you, you are made for him.

his hands fit in the nooks of your body, sidled by your hips and your waist as he pulls you onto his lap. “i never wanted to,” he says breathlessly. “i swear, i’ve never wanted to be away from you.” his lips attach to your neck, and you mewl, tilting your head for him.

“then why?” you murmur, hands tightening on his shoulders, knuckles white. “why did you?”

there is an answer that the both of you know deep down, in the recesses of your hearts. one that you’d agreed on all those years ago; the only thing you had agreed on in the middle of a screaming match, yelled in broken pitches and shards of dying sunlight.

we just don’t work.

but we do, you think now, from the way you’re rolling your hips onto his, and how he’s holding on to you like you’re a mirage, a dream that he needs to sink his claws into before you drift away. he needs you. asahi needs you.

and you need him. you do, you realise, after years of staring out windows counting lights and stars in the dusty skies. after callouses formed on your hands when you worked on dresses you never really had the heart for. asahi’s clothes are the only pieces that you put your whole heart into, a piece of you sewn onto the fabric with thin strands of your blood work. they’re the only clothes you will ever be proud of making.

and the marks he’s sucking into your skin are the only ones you’d be proud of showing.

you’d been with other people after your break up. men, women, they all came, stayed a night in your bed before you told them to leave, because none of them fit. none of them held you the way he’s holding you now, fingers digging into the plush flesh of your thighs as he rocks on over his thigh.

“you’ve needed this, haven’t you?” he whispers in your ear. “you have. i can feel it.”

there’s a really bold insinuation with the word need. you’ve never had a need for anything. not any amount of money, not any friends or colleagues. there is nothing in the world that would press you in a way that would make you need it.

but you can’t lie to asahi. you’ve never been able to. “i need you,” you beg, and it feels pathetic. it feels vulnerable. it feels right. “asahi, i- i need you, fuck.”

“yeah, you do,” his words are so close to you, like they’re in you, swimming in your head. voice low, timbre making you quiver in his grip. “and i need you just as much. always fuckin’ have.”

you question yourself and why. why what? you don’t know. why this is happening when you so intently promised yourself it wouldn’t, you wouldn’t fall for it again. but you did, you are, free falling dangerously as you shift your legs so slightly so your clit catches against the taut muscle of his thigh, even through layers of clothing. “fuck, say it again, please,” you beg, your hands coming up to wrap around his shoulders.

“say what?” his voice is so sweet but you can hear the teasing behind it. “that i need you?”

you nod, desperately. “yeah, yeah. am i— am i the only one?”

his hips tighten on your hips. “there’s never been anyone else,” he whispers, dragging your clothed cunt over his thigh. thank god you’re in a skirt today, because if you weren’t you don’t think you would have had the patience and good grace to shuck it off right now. you’re drooling over his dress pants, a dark stain over emerald green linen, mouthing at his neck as he grinds you up and down. “promise. you’re the only one.”

you keen. he’s always known what makes you tick, what makes you fawn. the friction on your cunt is delicious, the warm air making your head spin, and you just want him to touch you, bare skin on bare skin. but the responsible person in you remembers. the responsible person who you threw to the wind and left to fend for themselves in the dust of your fabric-laden floors.

“they’re gonna come back soon,” you gasp against his neck, your head tilting back to glimpse at the clock. 12:45. “they always come back at 1— fuck, that feels so good.”

“you think i can’t make you cum in fifteen minutes, baby?” your cunt pusles at the way it drops from his lips, the pet name you haven’t heard in years. you squeeze his shoulders tight, drawing your lip between your teeth. “i can make you cum twice.”

“but— you—” you’re cut off by one of his hands snaking between your bodies, slipping under your skirt. “asahi.”

“you’re dripping,” he whispers. “you’re staining my pants.”

“it’s your fucking fault,” you spit, angling so you can feel his fingers on you over your damp panties. “fuck, fuck— holy shit, your fingers,” the feeling of his fingertips on your clit make you jump, rough and calloused and warm. he coos in your ear, little sweet nothings melting like sugar from his lips. “wait. i can’t— wait.” you push yourself off of him for just a second, yanking your panties down your legs in a split second before climbing back onto his lap.

“desperate, huh?” he chuckles.

you slap his cheek. “shut up and make me cum.”

asahi smiles. you recognise his fondness. “that’s my girl.”

his fingers slip between your folds, covered in slick and taps your clit. you mewl softly, burying your face in his shoulder as he rubs at the sensitive bud, both your breathing growing shallow. “you’re still so fucking beautiful,” he coos in your ear. “that day when you first came to new york. you’re different. but you’re still beautiful.”

“shut up,” you grumble, rolling your hips unto his fingers, your cheeks heating up at his words. beautiful.

“it’s true,” he continues. “and nobody’s been spared the compliments i shower on you and your team. ask around. they’re sick of hearing me talk about you.”

the knot in your stomach is starting to build, starting to swell. the familiar sensation you’ve never been able to achieve so fast with yourself or anyone else as he draws circles on your clit with his thumb, aided by slick and spit. “you j-just haven’t met many good tail-lors then,” you choke out, biting back a moan. “asa— asahi, please.”

“i got you,” he whispers. “gonna make you cum all over me, yeah?” and he must have more brainpower than you do right now, dead and oozing and limp against him because he shoves away all your work and fabrics and threads with his free hand. “you better not spill a drop on any of your work.”

“who the fuck do you think i am,” you hiss between clenched teeth.

“the best seamstress in new york and japan,” he breathes, pinching your clit. you jerk in his arms, breath escaping you sharply. “the only girl i will ever want.”

“asahi,” you cry, the band in your navel beginning to break. “i’m gonna— please, please don’t stop, holy shit—”

and asahi speeds up, his fingers working tighter circles on your clit until you’re gushing, until he’s pushing you into blinding white, crashing down upon him like waves upon breakwaters. you’re gone, eyes squeezed shut as you let out a soft cry, cumming and cumming all over his fingers and pants. you feel his breath stutter as you come down slowly, and you open your eyes to meet his.

“another one,” he demands. “one more time, princess. said i was gonna make you cum twice. i need you to cum again, okay?” you don’t have a chance to reply before his fingers are back on your sensitive cunt, this time thick digits pressing at the seam of your slit.

“no, i—” you hiccup, “it’s s-sensitive, i—”

“yes you can,” he’s shaking his head, like he’s made the decision for you. (he has.) his fingers slip into your weeping mess of a pussy. “you’re my good girl, yes you can.”

and brainless as you are, you nod. “yes i can,” you murmur, leaning back slightly to grant him a better angle. “fuck, yeah, one more? one more f-finger?”

“three?” he asks softly, eyebrows pinched slightly. “you sure?”

you nod. “need it,” you promise. “need you.”

so he gives it to you. slips in one more finger beside the two already in you and pushes, thick calloused fingers reaching inside you where you could never yourself. he knows you, knows your sweet spots and your weaknesses better than you ever have. and hell if he’s not going to use that knowledge.

he’s fucking you on his fingers harshly, lewd, wet sounds of your pussy swallowing what he has to offer willingly cacophonous in your ears. you whine, thrash, drag your hips forwards and backwards in time with his thrusts to help him help you cum. “asahi,” you breathe.

“yeah, sweets?” he’s so kind. he’s looking at you like angel dust, like fairy wings. like you’re luminescent, glowing. like he loves you.

“i wanna m-make you cum too.”

he laughs dryly, allowing a single glance downward at his stained pants, his clothed erection straining against the fabric tautly. “don’t worry baby,” asahi kisses your cheek. “you can give me that another day. it’s about you now, okay?”

“nngh,” you manage to groan as he crooks his fingers inside you, prodding expertly at your gspot, jerking in his grip. “but— i want to—”

“get caught by your employees?” he whispers. “want them to walk in and see you getting fingered by the big ceo hm?” you clench (regrettably) at his words, and he all but lights up. “you do,” his voice is faraway, breathy. “you want them to see you.”

“no,” you let out, strangled, unconvincing. “i don’t— tha’s embarrassing—”

“you’re clenchin’ around me, princess,” he chuckles. “sick, sick little girl.”

you seal your mouth over his, swallowing his breath, his words. to shut him up, because you can’t deny the little truth in his statements. you press yourself against him, hips rolling forward onto his fingers, and a moan escapes your mouth. his lips are so soft, so warm against yours, almost comforting you about the fact that he’s three fingers knuckle deep in your pussy, stretching you out deliciously.

“gonna cum,” you mumble against him. “can feel it— can feel it in my tummy.”

“sweet girl,” his free hand drags against your clit, and you almost keel over. “sensitive, huh?”

you can’t answer him, not when you’re so close to cumming, so close to letting go all over him one more time. a whine leaves your lips, almost begging for him to make you finish.

“you know,” asahi starts, and you can tell by the small shake in his voice that he’s criminally affected by this too. “i wish it was my cock you were cumming around.”

and that does you in. that has you falling forward on his chest; not his fingers in you or on your clit, but his words, his sweet timbre, the quiver in his voice. you let go, cum for the second time all over his fingers, wet and slick and embarrassing but you don’t care, can’t care. there’s not a thought crossing behind your eyes anymore, just asahi, asahi, asahi.

he’s whispering in your ear when you come to comprehension again, little mumbles of, so good, such a good girl. so pretty when you cum. and you shiver, momentary weakness fading from the forefront of your mind. before you stands your ex boyfriend who’s just made you cum your brains out twice with just his fingers and his voice. your ex boyfriend who can read you like a book, no matter how much you wish to hide from him.

what have you done?

“baby?” his voice is small, tentative. “hey, what’s wrong?”

and then you’re up, backing away from him slowly. your senses return, your thoughts are loud, and you remember, you weren’t supposed to do this.

why did you do this?

“you should— you should go,” you say quietly. “before they come back. they’re,” you glance at the clock. 13:02. “you should…”

“don’t go back on me,” he steps forward but you step back. you try, try so hard to lift your gaze to meet his, but you can’t. “hey. hey. look at me.”

you can’t. so he makes you. he corners you by the wall and tilts your chin up with just enough force that says, listen to me. and so you look at him, his hair messy, his lips swollen red. his eyes are swimming with something you can’t quite read, something you can't recognise. worry? disgust?

“i meant what i said,” he whispers. “all of it. you’re the only girl i want.” why does it sting when he says that? why does your chest ache? “i don’t want to be without you anymore, okay?”

“i don’t understand,” you mumble.

“then i’ll help you,” his voice. it sounds so hurt. “please, baby. let me help you.”

“why did you—” you stop yourself, searching for the right word. leave doesn’t fit. “abandon me?”

there’s a moment in your lives that you always came back to. that morning in december when you woke up and he was gone. when you called him and he didn’t pick up. when you asked around, to everyone you both knew, and no one knew a thing. he abandoned you, in a foreign city, in a wasteland, in the rubble of the only relationship you ever cared about. your hands are trembling.

“i’m sorry,” he mumbles. “i’m so, so sorry.”

“you should go,” you tear your face away from his, shaking away the stern grip of his fingertips, your mouth moving faster than you can think. “i’ll— you can stop coming over. i’ll finish this, you pay me, and i leave. okay?”

silence. you don’t know what you want him to say. i don’t want to do that. okay, i’ll leave you alone forever. please, be with me. you don’t know why you said that.

but you know, in your heart of hearts, it’s for the best. you’ve asked him, asked him twice, and he hasn’t had an answer. asahi looks at you, and you don’t look back.

he leaves.

and you think new york has never felt this cold.

[eyecicles]

Hey! So I saw ur posts on Misa and 100% agree with u on the fact that her character had so much underutilized potential. If it’s not too much, what would u have included, for lack of better word, to improve her characterization in a way that would be near the level of the other male main leads?

Good question.

First, I want to point out that there are several things I do like about her—like how even though the role they gave her is pretty cliché, her personality makes it a bit more unique and interesting.

What I mean by that, is that having a female character that is unquestionably loyal to the protagonist and mainly preoccupied with romance, is anything by new. But her obsession with Light isn't treated as admirable or just “girls being girls”. Well, we do get a little of that, but it's still clear that Misa isn't a regular young woman. Light, who's not a stranger to dating and girlfriends, finds her behaviour alarming and isn't sure how to deal with her…at first.

We even get to see Misa and Rem to threaten Light, and he has to figure out how to deal with them. (Which takes him a while.)

I also like that they gave her moments where she can be smart and competent (how she manipulated Higuchi, for example).

On top of that, she's never manipulated into doing anything that goes against her own morals; she never gets corrupted. She readily kills innocents even before she meets Light.

Misa does have agency…mostly at the beginning of the story. She's allowed to be proactive a few times during the Yotsuba arc as well, but after the timeskip, she becomes almost entirely passive, which is what bothers me the most about she’s written.

Now, I can understand that with all those new characters we get, it would have been very hard to make her an active player as well. But knowing this doesn't make her arc any more decent.

The most obvious and popular way to create interesting storylines and relationships, is of course to have your characters' wishes clash. And although her and Light’s wishes aren’t perfectly aligned, Ohba doesn’t make that Light’s problem later on. Instead, we get that very uncomfortable and unfunny dinner she has with Kiyomi. (To make matters worse, Ohba admitted in HTR13 that he included it only because he thought it would be funny.)

And yes, if Light wanted to get rid of her at that point, it wouldn’t be too hard, so making her go against him could have been fatal. But that’s because Ohba wrote it that way.

I think that’s where we get closer to the issue here: Ohba very rarely gives female characters any sort of power that feels threatening. If he does, it’s only for a short period of time (because they quickly end up subdued or dead). And you don’t have to make Misa a genius or betray Light in order to become more of a threat, but you certainly would have to take her seriously. I’m pretty sure Ohba doesn’t do that. 

I’m not sure if I have a perfect answer to how best solve this. It certainly could have been interesting to let Light think he has her all figured out and docile, only for her to become more demanding and less predictable. We already know that she can be extremely stubborn and chaotic, and I could easily see how these traits could have come back to bite him in the ass.

We could also go back to the beginning and change a few things from here: make her powers (the Shinigami eyes) harder to replace, more valuable or basically indispensable. You could even give her powers Light can’t completely figure out (maybe something not fully explained that happens if a Shinigami sacrifices themself for you)—just anything that would make him depend on her more, really.

I don’t know how I would change the plot in detail, because there would be way too much to think about, but yeah. The main issue is that unlike L, Near, Mello or Ryuk, Misa doesn’t have to be dead in order to stop being a character Light has to take seriously.

[t0shii]

hi could i request kita, tendou, and mattsun and it’s your first time sleeping at their place and they find out you cant sleep in the dark and need to sleep with a night light?

% s/o who can't sleep in the dark

.! timeskip! kita, tendou, matsuwaka (sep) x gn!r

.! fluff/ mention of food in kita's, mention of rainstorm in tendou's, water drinking in mattsun's- not proofread.

.! hi! ty for the request <3 sorry u had to wait so long :(( (idk why these ended up to be so long)

kita

to say you were nervous to stay the night as your boyfriends place for the first time would be an understatement... your heart raced as kita placed your back on the ground to unlock the front door, "make yourself at home." he opens the door, "down there is the bathroom... and that's my room." he shows you around and you crack a joke about how clean his house is compared to your apartment. you both decide on a movie night with take out which he insisted you choose.

you yawn and rub your eyes as the third movie of the night ends. you'd been laying in between his legs, back pressed against his chest. you sit up and he follows, wrapping his arms around you and perching his chin on your shoulder, "sleepy? we can head to bed if you want." he mumbles into your neck before planting a kiss there, "mhm, let me change first though." you try standing up to reach your bag but his hold on you doesn't loosen, "i have clothes you can wear." he says bluntly, standing up and bringing you with him. he leads you to his room, rummages through his dresser and hands you a shirt and shorts, "these should fit, yeah? i'll leave so you can change."

you start to internally panic as you both settle into his bed, and he begins turning off every light in the room. suddenly theres only one bedside lamp illuminating the room, he reaches to turn it off and lays down, pulling your body against his which makes you giggle. "good night." he mumbles into your hair, "night." you sigh. 'maybe if you close your eyes you'll forget it's dark' you think to yourself, squeezing your eyes shut. thirty minutes pass you're still awake. you sigh, a little louder than intended, "y/n? are you still awake?" you mentally scold yourself, "yeah" he props himself up with his elbow; you angle your head back to look at him, "what's wrong?" the sleep in his voice evident. "well... uhm... i..." his eyes soften as he notices you becoming nervous and he cups your cheek with his free hand, "you can tell me angel."

you can help but lean into his touch "it's embarrassing" "not it's not" "okay well... i can't sleep in the dark. ever since i was a kid, i've never been able to." you can see eyebrows furrow from the small amount of moon light peeking through his curtains, "why didn't you tell me before i turned all the lights off?" he frowns, reaching over to turn the lamp on, relief filling your chest at the illuminated room. "because it's embarrassing." you mumble as he lays back down and pulls you against his chest again, "it's not embarrassing, baby, at least not to me. so no need to embarrassed, i won't judge you for i and besides, i don't mind sleeping with a light on." he places and kiss on your temple and you sleep well, secure and comfortable in his arms.

tendou

you'd been over to tendou's apartment plenty of times before and every time you made up some lame excuse for why you couldn't stay the night, "i need to feed my cat" "my clothes are still in the washer" literally anything to save you from the embarrassment of having to tell him you couldn't sleep in the dark. tonight was different though, with a storm passing over town and not looking like it's letting up any time soon, he wouldn't let you leave. "ten, i dont have any clothes here, my cat's by herself-" he cuts you off "babe, babe- you can wear something of mine if you want and i'm sure she'll be fine. she's a cat." he holds you firmly in your cuddling position on his couch. "fine." you grumble.

really, if he had to be honest, it hurt tendou's feelings a little bit that you were always against the idea of staying the night with him- but he had no choice but to celebrate this small victory and thank the rain storm, "it's for your safety, angel." he says proudly, placing a kiss on your cheek. you choose to ignore the nervous feeling creeping up your belly and rest your head back on his chest, "yeah yeah let's just continue with the show, i'm invested in the plot." "you mean the hot main characters?" "exactly... the plot." you giggle while he pretends to be offended. three hours later you find your eyelids getting heavier and heavier until you can barely keep them open and your boyfriend seems to take notice quickly.

"are you falling asleep on me? we haven't even finished season 3 yet." he mumbles and you let out a groan, "it's two in the morning, of course i'm getting sleepy." you rub your eyes, "i'm just giving you a hard time, babe. you're the one who wanted to stay up though but i guess we can go to bed now." you sit up and stands from his position on the couch and helps you up, "c'mon sleepy head, you can make it." he grins taking your hand and leading you to his room. he lets you sit on his bed while he looks through his dresser, "hmm is this shirt okay?" you nod as he hands you an old band shirt "i'll be right back." he leaves the room with his own change of clothes. once he's back you both lay down, "oh babe, i almost forgot, you wanna see something cool? he gets out of the bed and you respond with an "mhm" as he begins to turn all the lights off, a familiar nervousness creeping up your belly as the room gets darker and darker.

"okay okay, so i don't sleep well in pitch dark but the lamp is just too much light so i got this-" he plugs in a small object into the wall, stars illuminate his bedroom ceiling as well as your other surroundings and he smiles wide, "see it makes stars, theres a moving option too but i don't really like it that much. oh, and don't make fun of me." he says seriously, sliding back into bed with you, arms wrapping loosely around your waist, "well i can't make fun of you for that, satori." "i was just hoping you wouldn't, honestly." he chuckles. "babe, do you wanna know i always avoided staying the night here?" you ask, ready to confess your secret. "i didn't wanna force it out of you but now that you're ready, yes." you both turn your heads to look at each other. "the truth is, i was embarrassed because i also cant sleep in the dark, been that way for as long as i can remember. but i'm glad theres someone i can relate to." "how ironic" he mumbles, placing his face into the crook of your neck. you sleep like a baby in his arms that night.

matsuwaka

you were over at issei's place so he could help you study for an exam coming up, honestly you didn't want to stay as late as you did and when the both of you finally noticed the time he just wouldn't let you leave. "c'mon baby, it's too late. it would be irresponsible of me to let you go home now, i don't mind you staying the night." he hugs you tight like you'll disappear if he lets go, face buried in the crook of your neck. you sigh in defeat, "okay fine." his head perks up as you say it and he smiles at you, "i can get you something to sleep in if you want."

that's how you got in this situation, awake hours after your boyfriend had already fallen asleep. finally after two hours of laying in the dark listening to his snores, you sigh quietly, slipping out of his loose embrace and tip toeing your way to his kitchen to get a glass of water and sat at the dining table. you'd been sitting there for about thirty minutes before you heard the bedroom door creak open and heavy, rushed footsteps make their way towards you. "y/n?" you recognize a panic in your boyfriend's groggy voice, "i'm in here." you croak out hearing a sigh of relief escape his lips once he sees you. you look up at him, his hair was an absolute curly mess and his eye lids were droopier than they already were, he was obviously still half asleep. "y/n there you are. he sits in a chair next to you, "you scared me, i woke up and you were gone. i thought you left." he leans his head on your shoulder, "sorry." you mumble, bringing a hand up to run through his hair a few times resulting in a groan from the man.

"'s okay, how long have you been awake?" "hmm about two and a half hours now." you reply honestly, "what? baby, why didn't you wake me up?" he raises his head and you both turn to look at each other, "you were tired, issei-" he interrupts you, "so? you shouldn't have had to be awake by yourself." "it's fine, i knew it was gonna happen, i knew i wouldn't be able to sleep" "why's that?" you sigh, internally scolding yourself for the hole you've dug yourself into. "i... i cant sleep in the dark." he looks at you for a moment, "that's all? that's what kept you up this whole time?" he asks and you nod. mattsun can't help the grin that makes his way onto his lips, "baby, you should've just told me, i could've kept a light on for you." "no- look i shouldn't have told you now you'll think i'm immature." you mumble, looking away from him. "no no baby, it's totally normal, honestly and i don't think any less of you. i just wish you would've told me sooner because then we'd both be sleeping right now. he hugs you before standing the both of you up, "c'mon we're going to bed." he grabs your glass and leads you back to his bed. you sleep in his embrace, table lamp illuminating the room the rest of the night.

[yoimix]

haikyuu!! as types of best friends.

➼ ft. hinata, sugawara, bokuto, osamu+atsumu.

➼ playlist. talk too much - coin, higher - banks, romanticism - mrs green apple, me and my friends - james vincent mcmorrow

➼ a/n. these have light bff2l undertones hhn i love that trope, pls forgive me. </3 + there’s some timeskip spoilers for atsumu & osamu’s part.

❀ hinata :-

i wish the childhood best friends trope a very good evening.

no one’s better than hinata at making friends, even if you met after he spiked a ball into your face. you’re childhood best friends too !! so imagine being a child and having to pick up this goofball by the scruff, who has the audacity to ask you to play with him after giving you a scratched up forehead and teary eyes from a ball to the face. but, like, you were the one who said yes so it’s on you :-)

sometimes you bicker but it’s ok bc he would literally go to the ends of the earth for you if you asked. no kidding. he hates sitting still anyway so he’ll just gravitate towards where you are like you’re the sun. also gets you taiyaki in the evenings but climbs in through your window instead of using the front door like a normal person. (he has too much energy </3) if you hear someone yelling your name outside your window and ranting about volleyball games, you know who it is.

ok when he makes you mad with his bullheadedness, you'll be complaining with kageyama (who agrees vehemently) and hinata gets pissy bc you get along a little too well when you're throwing insults about him. (he's not jealous, no, of course not.) but.. how long can you stay mad at this sunshine child anyway?? you'll be pretending you never got mad at all within a few hours and go back to joking around.

he gets distracted if you're watching a match sometimes (bokuto somehow got it into his head that he needs to show off in front of you) so you got banned from watching. he overcomes it later on so you can cheer him on in his jersey too <3

gives you ALL his attention when you talk or even complain about your life. he reacts a lot to whatever you have to say so you have to pretend there aren’t people behind you glaring at hinata for having the same decibel sound level as a jet engine.

you have matching keychains you bought at a local fair !!! (you got a pochacco one for hinata but it’s super worn out by now so he keeps it in his wallet instead.) 

he has not won a single multiplayer video game against you (*cough cough* mario kart *cough*) and you don’t even have to be good at it. if you call him a loser, he’ll lose even harder. gets unnecessarily mad at just dance and you have to calm him down.

... you’ve probably kissed bc the two of you (mostly him) were too eager for a first kiss and you got fed up with his pubescent ramblings and ended up kissing him. and then had an early mid-life crisis bc you guys are definitely just friends. (unless.. unless he doesn’t think that way.. surprise surprise 😳) also he's.. kind of bad for make out practice... it’s like kissing a month old puppy.. sorry :/. if you happen to make a lot of offhand comments and tease him about his kissing skills, he WILL turn tomato red and argue in gibberish. only do that in private bc the rest of the world thinks you’re sickeningly cute together >:(

overall, your best friend is a ball of sunshine (who occasionally pisses you off) and your #1 motivation to get out of bed. it's mostly bc he's somehow there to get you out of bed though you've repeatedly told him to not climb in through your window. at least the sun is smiling upon you every day <3

❀ sugawara :-

being best friends with him is such a secure relation !! 

he’s your soft place to fall but also would provide gentle (not so gentle) reminders for your wellbeing (STUDY!!! WATER!!!! BREAKFAST!!). doesn’t get mad when you say you skipped breakfast but gives you this look of disappointment which is 100x more effective. still gets a granola bar for you though. also he literally carries bandaids for u and he’s been doing that since second grade bc you fell off the swing ONCE. you know, just in case. if you’re an accident-prone hazard to society, you’re in luck. 

BEST HUGS especially if you had a rough day and want to sob into his shoulder. if u damage his $85 hoodie tho, he will make u do his laundry and also buy snacks for him. but like he is so soft (his skin is SUPER soft bc he actually follows a skincare routine now) and cuddly like a teddy bear, it's a small price to pay for salvation.

he will hype you up for anything you do !!!! new outfit? offers to be your personal photographer. scored an A+? will treat u to your fav ice-cream. new job? will tell everyone just how proud he is. 

ALWAYS shares the last bite with you and smiles to himself when you eat it so contented. also!!! hanging out at cafes and taking cute pictures is a must <3 even though you’re not dating, you’ll have photos together that make you look a real couple which ensue teasing from daichi and asahi and admiration/jealousy from noya and tanaka. also he gets weirdly protective of you around the team (i’m looking at the moron quartet) and you have to pull the “koushi you’re not my mom” card. it really strikes a chord with him when you say that out loud.

will egg your ex's house with you if you say the word. somehow gets more pissed than you at your ex (if they're a shitty one). it's kind of scary when he's mad too so.... good luck calming him down. he's also really good at sarcastic trash talk so if you happen to meet your ex on the street... send prayers for their self-esteem.

you don't really fight often but if you happen to disagree, he'll go about it in a pretty mature way and talk it out. if you pick a fight on purpose, he'll catch on to it and either tickle you (excessively) or flick your forehead as punishment for trying to rile him up. it’s impossible to prank him!!!!! it’s like he’s got a sixth sense or something so you might as well give up on anything of the sort. 

you said you want to get a dog (or cat) with him in the near future and he somehow equated that to having children. turned bright red and started saying it’s too soon to be thinking of that while you had daichi stop you from smacking some sense into your overly imaginative best friend. (i mean, you do need to live together if you want to raise a pet sooo)

his lockscreen is a picture of the two of you so a lot of people who try to hit on him take the hint quick. he says it’s unintentional but you know he can be terribly scheming at times. if you say something like “why don’t you date me for real, coward” he will malfunction and not be able to look you in the eye. (“don’t joke around, y/n” “what if i’m not” “it kind of feels illegal to date you” “what do you mean?!💢”)

anyway you are one lucky mf if you have sugawara koushi as your best friend even if there are both ups and downs (mostly ups). having someone care for you so blatantly certainly makes the question of romance arise but you’re content with the most loving best friend ever.

❀ bokuto :-

you guys are the “two best friends in a room, we might kiss” “yes we will” “what” type of best friends PLS

it doesn’t matter what stage of life you met him, it’ll feel like you’ve been best friends since the beginning of time.

it’s just so easy to make friends with this airhead and by god’s gift, you cannot physically get annoyed at this man. sometimes his friends will complain about him being forgetful or blunt but you’re just there like. yeah. that’s bokuto. love him for it. (you seem to have a lot of patience.)

he probably gets into trouble with authority unwittingly, so save your weekends to sweet talk his way out after accidentally implying the coach has a weak mindset. afterwards, you go get ice cream or something and hang out at the dog park to forget it happened. (the amount of second hand embarrassment bokuto has given you though... you need some hard drugs to forget all of it.) 

you probably make a lot of friends through him in high school/college but at the end of the day, it’s just you and him and sometimes akaashi making sure you guys are alive. if you guys are alone together on a friday night, you’ll still be having fun!! very often, it takes shape as karaoke :-) bokuto thinks he’s really great at rapping for some reason (he’s not) so cue you screaming the lyrics in an attempt to ruin your part of the song equally. also he always sets the key wrong??? although you sing the same songs each time?? sometimes he picks a song neither of you have ever heard and the both of you try to guess the melody. he’s terrible at it but at least he’s funny. there’s not a single song he hasn’t had a voice crack in.

if you go clubbing/partying with him, get prepared to be introduced as the friend of “the guy who did four keg stands in a row before proceeding to do a cartwheel unprompted and somehow not throw up”. is on first name basis with the bartenders/hosts and gets you free drinks. also gets hit on often but is oblivious unless they’re being very straightforward. if he’s not into them... you have to pull the s/o card and save his ass. oh also he barks at anyone that gets near your drink.

will always exaggerate when introducing you to new people. “y/n and i met when i saved them from drowning a terrible death.” “it was the children’s pool and you were the one that was screaming.” “and then y/n didn’t really thank me but it’s not like heroes need thanks to do the right thing.” “kou, i will push you into a pool right now, let’s see how well you swim.” (he learned swimming to impress you so joke’s on you.)

he likes to watch you do stuff at the end of the day, so if you see him go o_o at you doing homework, you can just put your earphones on and focus on your work. even if he’s making.. a strangely.. adorable expression. also LOVES to listen to you talk about your day when he’s tired, he says it helps him sleep better (so expect a lot of nighttime calls). moreover, if you say you had a bad dream, he’ll comfort you with his ridiculously confident tone of voice (unless the dream was about something bad happening to him, then he’ll freak out and you’ll have to comfort him instead </3)

ok one thing that’s annoying about him is that he probably leaves food crumbs over your stuff like laptop, bed sheet, etc. you clean it up but bokuto.. is a bit... distracted to notice the mess he’s making. it’s usually pretty difficult to get him to be more aware, but like your glare is enough to make him at least try to be careful from the next time. (either that or he’s become sensitive to your change in mood/emotions bc you know... you’re best friends after all.)

i’m not gonna lie, he probably catches feelings for you at some point. he wants to, like, keep it lowkey bc akaashi told him to take your feelings into consideration too but?? it’s so hard?? you’re literally so pretty?? everything you say is like music to him??? he reacts reflexively to all the firecracker feelings u give him. he probably says he likes you all the time but you dismiss it with “as a friend right :-)”. there’s no climbing up from that one, sorry bokuto.

to summarize, if a moody golden retriever was your human best friend.exe

❀ miya twins :-

they feel like a set. it would be strange to have one of the twins as a bff and not have the other one around whoops 🤷‍♀️ 

either you and osamu bully atsumu in your free time, or you and atsumu annoy osamu for fun (or both) <3. it’s always a good idea to team up with osamu and prank atsumu for fun btw. (put wasabi in his breakfast pancakes and you’ll get a very pissed off but weirdly cute tsumtsum. you can blame it on osamu if you don’t want to face his wrath.) your alternative is to embarrass osamu in front of strangers with atsumu, have fun with that. (second hand embarrassment also works.)

when you were younger, you pretended to not be able to distinguish the twins bc it would visibly rile atsumu up and then you’d go “ok you’re atsumu”... which would further rile him up. osamu got used to your shenanigans though it ticked him off the first time too LOL. call them the wrong name on purpose and they’ll start a riot; be careful when you’re playing with fire pls.

you guys played a lot of knight and prince/princess/royal when you were a kid and atsumu would always try to make osamu the evil dragon holding you captive. in the end, you were somehow the knight, osamu the prince to be rescued and atsumu the big, bad dragon. (it’s kind of funny in hindsight. your parents have photographs of the three of you fighting like no tomorrow.) also speaking of which, your parents are also friends and have bets on which twin you’ll marry (or if you will at all). it’s tearing your parents’ friendship apart.

these two have DEFINITELY fought over whose jersey number you’re going to wear to the games ( “oi, ‘samu, stop brainwashing my best friend into wearing your stupid double digit number” “you know i’m the best friend, ‘tsumu. they clearly like me better over yer ratty ass.” “what did ya say?!?!? if anything, you’re the one that looks like ratatouille.”) you wore kita's jersey number to games.

imagine sunday picnics with the boys !!! by that, i specifically mean osamu and his perfect bento boxes <3 sometimes the two of you will cook together before your outings while a sulking atsumu stands outside bc you didn’t let him. (let him in, you monsters.) he says he can cook too but the last time the twins’ bickering almost burnt the whole kitchen down. the picnics continue well into adulthood and you get to diss your boss to the twins who will always support your rants. (sometimes atsumu will tell you it’s your fault but you can smack him off. we only need supportive besties here 🙄)

if someone hurts u.... they’re going to need divine intervention to be safe... you have two well-built, physically adept best friends ready to beat the shit out of anyone who deliberately breaks ur heart. 

when the twins get into a physical fight...... oh boy. it kinda pisses you off that they’re spewing profanity at each other and you’re the one getting glares. but at the same time, you don’t really want to step into a fight that has nothing to do with you. people should solve their interpersonal issues on their own. they have never fought over you, this isn’t twilight <3 

but the question did come up once on which twin you like better; it’s not something to seriously fight over though. if you chose osamu, atsumu will complain for six days straight and you’ll start to regret ever answering the question. if you say atsumu, osamu won’t feed you his onigiri anymore for a few days which is just as bad. the safest choice is to say neither bc it will both be funny and you won’t suffer too many consequences. if you say you love the both of them for being your best friends all this time and go all mushy, there’s a slight chance they’ll go soft too. god help you from the bone crushing hug you’re about to receive 🙏

you make sure to not miss any of atsumu’s official games !! sometimes he’ll wave at you and make the reporters give you hell bc he’s a little shit. just push osamu to them and run away if it gets that bad. (he gets free advertising for his shop, he should be grateful.)

osamu is super good at cheering you up!!! whether it’s with food or with pleasant talk, you’ll be feeling much better with a full stomach and a calmer state of mind. as for atsumu, he’s really good at you cheering you up by distracting you. he’ll talk about his team or this new serve he learnt and the world will seem a lot brighter bc he seems so happy about it. whichever twin you go to, it’s win-win. 

in return, the twins take up a good chunk of your time. sometimes atsumu will crash at your place after a game though you’ve told him to not lead the damn reporters here. osamu makes you taste test his experimental onigiri... which are not always good..... no seriously, why’d he put honey and tuna in there ?? but still, your life is ridiculously colorful with them around.

anyway, what can i say except what’s better than one best friend?? two best friends !!!

[krisdreaming]

Fluff but make it ✨O S A M U✨

Your wish is my ✨C O M M A N D✨

But seriously I made myself so soft planning out this lil drabble 😭 It’s timeskip Samu, and I really really hope that I got his characterization down and also that I didn’t write anything that contradicts canon lmao

-

Osamu opens the door as softly as possible, on the off-chance that you’re already in bed and asleep. About an hour earlier, after you’d finished filing the stack of paperwork on his desk and muffled a yawn with your fingers, he’d told you to do just that. He’d stayed behind to finish up a few more loose ends, things he knew he wouldn’t want to work at first thing tomorrow morning any more than he did tonight. 

In the living room, he finds that he was half right. You’re asleep, but you’re curled up on the couch instead of in bed, with your phone just slipping out of your fingers. He shakes his head. You always insist on waiting up for him, no matter how late he gets home. 

You’re propped up awkwardly on the couch, your fist tucked up under your cheek and your mouth hanging just slightly open, producing the occasional soft snore. A smile tugs at the corners of his lips. He could watch you sleep like this for hours. 

Something about your sleeping face reminds him just how young the two of you are. You’re in your early twenties, but sometimes he can’t help but feel like the two of you are barely more than kids, even though you’ve worked so hard and accomplished so much. It had been a long few years, but the dream you’d worked alongside him to build has finally become a reality. 

Sometimes he wonders if you ever get tired of this - of the late nights and the early mornings and the countless hours he’s poured into this business that he could have been pouring into you. He knows what you’d say if he asked, though. Don’t be ridiculous, Samu. We’re in this together, aren’t we?

He’s not sure if he made some kind of sound or if you just sensed his presence, but you start to stir, your eyes blinking open and catching him watching you. “Samu? What’re you doing?” You murmur with a soft giggle. Now that you’re awake, you’re giving him a sleepy, doe-eyed look that settles somewhere deep in his middle.

“Nothin’,” He says too softly, unable to mask the fond smile that’s growing on his face. You return it easily, and reach out with both hands silently beckoning him to join you. “Y’know we should be gettin' to bed,” He reminds you, but he sinks down next to you anyway.

He settles your thighs across his lap and you immediately bury your face in the crook of his neck, releasing a low hum of contentment as you burrow closer to him. “You smell like rice,” You murmur after a few moments, and he huffs out a soft laugh.

“That does happen,” he concedes, resting his cheek on the top of your head. You both fall silent again, just soaking up these quiet moments of being together. Sometimes they seem so few and far between. You feel around for a few seconds before your hand finds his, and you lace your fingers together. Absently, he begins slowly tracing his thumb across the back of your hand. It isn’t long until he hears your breathing slow.

“Don’t fall asleep again,” He nudges you, and you pop your head up quickly to look at him.

“I wasn’t,” You shake your head a little too hard, and he shoots you an incredulous look. Reluctantly, he slides you off of his lap and gets back to his feet. You release a soft whine at the loss of his body heat, but before you can protest he leans down and scoops you up in his arms.

You squeak out a surprised sound, your arms quickly looping around his neck. “Let’s get you to bed, sleepyhead,” He whispers, pressing a kiss to your temple. He carries you down the hall to your room, finally setting you down on the edge of the bed. You tug on his t-shirt to pull him close for a kiss before he can get too far.

He pulls away again after a few moments and turns to the dresser, rooting around for something for the both of you to wear to bed. “You could’ve at least put on your pajamas before you decided to get all cozy on the couch,” He grumbles good-naturedly as he tosses you one of his t-shirts and a pair of shorts. 

“Mm,” You shrug, changing and lobbing your clothes from the day into the hamper across the room. You both crawl under the covers at the same time, and naturally shift close together, laying nose to nose in the semi-darkness. He lifts his hand to brush a few stray strands of hair away from your face, then cups your cheek in his palm.

“I love you,” He murmurs candidly, leaning in to press a kiss to the tip of your nose, then a longer one to your lips.

“Love you, too,” You hum against his lips, your voice already low from the sleep pulling at you again, “So so much, Samu.”

“I wouldn’t want to do this with anyone else,” He admits softly, watching your sleepy smile fade as your eyes droop shut. “You’re it for me, y’know?” Your only response is a soft snore. “Always have been,” He adds, pulling you close and burying his nose in your hair to press a kiss to the top of your head before finally giving in to sleep himself.