#also they should have really short skirts on. for easy access. i mean what

[hemipenal-system]

im actually the nicest gentlest dragon in the stable and they should assign all the cute little rosy-cheeked rookie riders to me

[starrynite7114]

roommates: four

A/N: Hello everyone! Happy weekend! Hope your week has been a good one! So my brain has been going 100mph. I’m trying to calm it down and focus on one thing, but that’s proving to be hard. LOL BUT I’M TRYING. Sorry the updates are taking longer, I’ve been getting ideas and it just takes over my brain. School is starting back up next week so I’m going to try my best to go on a writing spree this weekend so I can try and update every week. Emphasis on TRY. But thank you for continue to support me, you all are just too lovely. 

Also, I have two Angel request I’m going to try to post since they are half way done along with the EZ request. I’m really lagging on EZ, but it will be posted. 

EZ request

Dance (Angel)

Always you (Angel)

Lake Part Two

Sex Guru Angel

Everything is you: part 12

Graduation (EZ request)

Rio request

Two Daddy Angel request: Snuggling and Trip to the aquarium

Groupchat for updates! Please join since the tags could be a bit iffy at times!

If you would like to be added to the tag list, please let me know! My tag list is a little messy, but please let me know if you want to be added!

Masterlist

roommates

Word count: 7697

Warnings: Mentions of abuse, smut, angst

You looked at your closet, thinking of what to wear tonight for your date with Angel. He suggested that you wore something comfortable, casual, no dressy outfits. 

‘But if you want to wear a skirt for my benefit, by all means mami, go right ahead.’

Angel was too much, but you weren’t complaining. Ever since you agreed to go on a date a few days ago, Angel has been occupying your bed. He always reasoned that it was due to the fact that your bed was comfortable, but you’ve slept on his bed before and it was equally as comfortable. You stopped trying to kick Angel out of your bed since you enjoyed his company. And you figured it wouldn’t be long till Angel got over this need to be with you. You felt like he was just scratching some itch about going down memory lane. You didn’t think Angel was interested and you figured this need he had for you would fade. You had no plans on furthering your relationship and it was to protect yourself and Angel. Agreeing to this date, you didn’t regret it, you wanted to go on a date with Angel, see how it was after all these years. 

“It shouldn’t be this difficult to pick out clothes.” You sighed, placing your hands on your hips, looking at yourself in the mirror. 

“You don’t have to try and impress me, I’m already impressed.”

You jumped hearing Angel’s voice. You turned and found him leaning against your doorframe, looking sinfully good. His kutte was not on him for once. He was wearing a short sleeve black button up, jeans and boots. His hair was slicked back, newly trimmed along with his beard. But you had to remain strong, you couldn’t let Angel know that he made the butterflies in your stomach go wild. Or that whenever he smiled at you, you found yourself flustered since even when you were younger, Angel’s smile was your favorite thing about him. You made it your mission to keep that smile on his face. Whenever Angel was with you, you noticed how carefree he was and that’s all you could ask for. 

You and Angel were always able to be yourselves around one another. 

No bullshit, nothing. 

“Impress you? Absolutely not, I dress for me baby.” You blew him a kiss before turning back towards your vanity. “Besides, just in case I see some other good looking guy wherever we go, at least I’m dressed to impress.” That was a lie, your eyes wouldn’t leave Angel’s tonight, but he didn’t need to know that. 

“Look at you talking shit again.” Angel walked over to you just as you stood up from your vanity. When you turned around, you ran into Angel’s chest. One of his arms wrapped around you, while his hand cupped your face. Without any warning, Angel kissed you, which took your breath away as always. You thought that if you kept kissing Angel, the effects of his kiss would wither away, but you were wrong. It was like every kiss was different on a miniscule level, but it was and it always took your breath away. “This ass is mine baby.” He grabbed your ass, a moan escaping your lips. “God, let’s just order pizza and let me show you who that pussy belongs to.” He bit your ear, another moan coming out of you.

You bit your lip and looked up at him, your fingers began to unbutton his button up. “I wouldn’t be opposed to that.”

“No, no, don’t tempt me.” He captured your lips again, his hands stopping you from further undoing his buttons. “I got a night planned for us, but we can definitely have a happy ending later.” 

You laughed. “Are you going to tell me where we’re going?”

“Somewhere nice, fun.” He pulled away from you to stop the temptation he faced. 

“So we’re going to a strip club?” You teased.

“Listen, if you want to go to a strip club baby girl, I’m down, but I would rather you strip this outfit for me later tonight.” He twirled you around, your skirt flowing along with the twirl. You wore a white v-neck for your top and a navy blue skirt, shorts underneath.

“Hmm, maybe.” You held up two pairs of shoes, one were heels, while the other were Air Jordan’s. 

“Heels or Jordan’s?” 

“Jordan’s, you don’t need heels where we’re going.”

“Can you just give me a hint?” 

“It would defeat the purpose of a surprise.”

“You’re annoying.”

Angel chuckled. “Learned from your annoying ass.”

Angel had been driving for forty-five minutes and the sun had setted. It was nice to watch the sunset, listening to some old school jams, and with Angel’s hand was intertwined with yours. You could get used to this, but at the same time, you had your reservations. While Angel made it clear that the scars didn’t bother him, it was still an insecurity for you. Why would he want damaged goods? It was a thought that Carmelo basically embedded in your mind. Why would anyone want damaged goods? Why would anyone want to touch a woman who had someone else’s initials carved on them? He wanted to mark you up so that no one else would want you, so he could have you, you would have no choice. It was all about choice with Carmelo. He would be your choice, your only choice. He isolated you, made sure that you had no choice but to stay with him. 

But then Medina came along and gave you a choice. 

At first, it was just an escape from your reality. 

Then the outings with his wife came about and Carmelo didn’t mind since he was mildly afraid of Medina’s wife.

Then eventually he helped you escape Carmelo.

You never asked for details, you didn’t want details. All you cared about was that Carmelo was gone.

“Baby, I lost you.” Angel softly squeezed your hand. 

“Sorry,” you offered him a smile and you noticed that he had stopped driving. Looking at the place before you, you smiled. “Angel Reyes, you want to get your ass kicked on our first date?” He brought you to your favorite mini-golf place, a date you two had plenty of times when you were still teenagers.

“This isn’t our first date and kick my ass?” He scoffed. “Baby, daddy’s winning this.”

“Odd term to refer to me as, daddy, but I mean, whatever floats your boat.” You shrieked as you exited your car, grabbing your stuff. 

You closed the door and Angel made his way over to you, backing you up against your car. “You’re such a shit talker today.” He smirked. “We should make this interesting.” 

“How so?” You were intrigued. 

“Let’s make a wager, if I win, you left me fuck you in your car after we finish, but if you win, you could have your way with me.” 

“Ooh, or, if I win, we go home right after this, forget the rest of your plans and you can fuck me at home.” You whispered this in his ear, making Angel groan.

“Fuck it, you win, let’s go home.”

“No,” you shook your head. “We just got here, let’s play, just so daddy can hand your ass to you.”

Angel chuckled. “Keep that energy up.”

You were currently at the last hole for mini-golf. Angel was kicking your ass, which didn’t surprise you. You always knew he let you win when you two were younger.

“I can’t wait to have those legs wrapped around me.” He whispered into your ear as you made your way to hit the golf ball.

You scoffed. If you made a hole in one, you could win. But of course, the last hole was rarely the easiest. 

“You look good sticking your ass out like that.” Angel licked his lips, the gesture was not amiss by you.

Looking over at Angel, you playfully glared at him. “You’re distracting me.”

“Is that your excuse of why you’re doing so terribly?” Angel smirked.

“Fuck you Angel.”

“That’s the plan baby girl.”

You rolled your eyes and hit the ball. And much like you predicted, you lost. Angel walked with that damn swagger towards you, but it seemed to have grown tenfold. His confidence made Angel so much more attractive. He was already an attractive guy, but this swagger, the smirk on his face, that shirt that accentuated his newly sculpted body, it was sinful.

How could you keep resisting him?

“I’m glad you wore the skirt.”

“Yeah? Why is that?”

“Easy access.”

You moaned, your fingers became entangled in Angel’s hair, your back arching as he continued to eat you out. His lips parted from your nether lips, the devilish smirk on his lips, your juices make his beard glisten.

“Fuck,” you breathed out. You would never tell Angel he was the best oral sex you ever had. Best sex you ever had, period. “I’m so close daddy.” 

“I know baby,” he spat down on your pussy, the added lubrication was not needed, but the mere act of it turned both of you on. Angel slid in two fingers in you, your skirt was bunched up above your stomach, Angel watching his ringed fingers disappear in you. His rings would bump against your entrance, the cold metal making the experience that much more erotic. “So fucking tight like always.”

“Uh huh,” you panted. “Daddy please let me come, let me come on your dick.” Control was something you rarely gave, especially with everything that happened with Carmelo. But with Angel, it was almost natural. 

Angel bit your inner thigh. “I told you that you would be begging for daddy’s dick.” His mouth was back on you once again, adding a third finger sliding in and out of you. 

“That feels so good.” You whimpered, moving your hips to meet his. 

“Don’t move.” He held your hips down, he sucked your clit in, the added sensation felt so good. You felt your legs shaking, the tears welling up in your eyes. Angel had already made you come three times prior to your impending one. “Look at you, my pussy is just clenching my fingers, wishing it was daddy’s dick. You want daddy to stretch his tiny pussy out?” 

“Yes daddy,” you begged, your hand resting on his hand that was holding your hip down. 

Angel chuckled. He increased the pace of his fingers and before long, you were arching your back, seeing stars as you screamed out Angel’s name. Angel continued moving his fingers in and out, your walls sucking him in, keeping you feeling full. Pushing him away, you moved down your folded middle seats and took a deep breath. Angel’s eyes were locked with yours, licking the juices that were on his fingers. He pulled you towards him, cupping your face as he kissed you, his tongue massaging yours, your hand drifting under his shirt. His lips hovered above yours as he stopped your hand from moving further. 

“Not yet baby, let’s eat and then I can fuck that pretty little pussy.” He gave you one last peck and moved down to sit at the edge of your trunk. You two had gotten some In N Out burgers with fries and a shake. Once you were at the lookout that rarely anyone frequented at night, Angel tore your panties off of you and ate you out. Your food was cold now, but you didn’t give a fuck, Angel gave you some of the best orgasms you’ve ever had and you hated him for it. 

You sat next to him, the wetness in between your thighs should have made you feel disgusted, but knowing it was due to Angel, it made you wetter. Angel handed you your burger. You didn’t realize how hungry you were till the burger was in your hand. You two quickly ate your burger and fries, the melted milkshake still hit the spot. Angel moved to sit behind you, wrapping his arms around your middle and resting his chin on your shoulder. 

The view of Santo Padre below you was breathtaking. You always enjoyed the peace and quiet, something Angel always tried to provide for you. Whenever you were stressed out, Angel provided the escape for you and you always appreciated how well he could read you. 

“Why’d you come back to Santo Padre?” Angel always meant to ask you when he first saw that you had come back to this little town of his. He didn’t understand why you would come back, there was nothing here.

You shrugged. “I don’t know. After the whole thing with Carmelo, I wanted to disappear. Being up north just had too many memories and I was just embarrassed for everything that happened.” You leaned your head back against Angel’s chest. 

“Embarrassed?” Angel’s head lifted, looking at your side profile. 

“I was always so strong willed and wouldn’t take shit from anyone.”

“Say that again.”

You playfully elbowed Angel and he laughed, kissing your cheek. “I was embarrassed, I shunned my family and friends. Then when I finally opened my eyes, I could barely open them.” The memories of Carmelo’s abuse never waned, it was always present like it occurred the previous day. It was easier to mask your feelings or the fear you felt during those times. The scars on your back were nothing compared to the scars he inflicted within. How low you felt always came to hunt you. Confidence was always something you possessed, it was reinforced by your family along with your friends. Cheating was a deal breaker and abuse was above that. After the first hit, you always questioned yourself why you didn’t leave, then you realized that the emotional abuse started before the physical. Carmelo caught you in a low point, a patient had died on you, a nine year old and he swept in. The way he belittled you, it made you feel like an inadequate nurse and that’s when the abuse truly started. He knew how to make you feel low, reminding you that due to your inadequacy the nine year old passed. 

But you realized now that it wasn’t your fault. 

But Carmelo already had done his damage. 

It took you some time to recover, but being up north suffocated you. The further south you were the better and for some reason, you ended up in Santo Padre. Your mentor, Pierre, an older ED physician took a job in Santo Padre Medical Center and you followed. Santo Padre always held special memories for you and a change of scenery was needed. You didn’t think you would run into Angel, but fate had another thing planned for you.

“This wasn’t your fault you know.” Angel hated hearing the defeat in your voice, the embarrassment. A man who was supposed to cherish you and protect you was the one who did such incredible damage to you. Angel could not forgive that. He had to find Carmelo and kill the mother fucker. He didn’t deserve to be walking on this earth after what he did to you. 

“I know that now. He got me when I was in such a low place. He made me feel like a million dollars, but he also made me feel like I was the lowest scum in the world. I loved him, all I wanted was for him to love me. He always told me he did, that when he hit me, he was trying to correct bad behavior so that I would remain perfect.” You felt your chest tightening up thinking of Carmelo’s words. How he sunk his claws into your brain was something you never understood, but it happened. 

Angel didn’t want to indulge in going down memory lane about Carmelo, but he wanted to know just how much he hurt you. Though, Angel realized that this may not have been a good idea since he felt his blood boiling. This was supposed to be your date, he shouldn’t be fucking worried about Carmelo. But he was going to find this man and make sure he endured the pain you went through, even greater than. 

“He’ll never be able to touch you again.” Angel whispered against the side of your head. 

“Medina took care of him.”

“I know baby, but you’re with me now. He will never go near you again.” 

And you believed Angel. As long as he remained your roommate, you felt invisible, untouchable. The Mayans were well respected, well feared in Santo Padre. They didn’t need to be like, their presence invoked different types of emotions from everyone. 

“When you get married, you should let me rent out a room so you can assure I would stay safe.” Angel knew your tactic. You were subtly trying to put him in the friend zone by mentioning his future without you by his side. It was cute, but that wasn’t going to work on him. He would show you that he was worth a second chance. 

“Why would you need to rent a room when you’re going to be sharing a room with me?” 

You smiled, shaking your head. “You’re too smooth Reyes.”

“Maybe, but don’t act like I didn’t just give you a couple of mind blowing orgasms. You can keep trying to push me away, but it’s not going to work.” Angel turned your face towards him, kissing you. 

You pulled away, your eyes closed as you relished the feel of Angel’s lips against yours. “Has it always been this intense between us?” Your forehead rested against his.

“Do you just try not to remember our relationship?” He gave you a quick peck again. 

“Shut up, I do, but I don’t know.” You turned to face Angel, wanting to see his reaction to your conversation. “Sometimes I look back at our relationship and wonder what would have happened if we had stayed together.” It was a thought that was always at the back of your mind. The what ifs scenario.

What if you stayed with Angel? Where would you two be? Would you two be together? Would you two have fallen apart?

What if you decided to come back to Santo Padre after you became a nurse? Would you two have reconnected?

For years after you left, you thought of Angel often. Your connection was always strong when you were younger and at times you felt it may have been too early for you two. That if you met at a later time, things would have been different. You remembered when Angel would sneak into your room, sleep over and pretend he was coming to pick you up in the morning. It wasn’t often but you enjoyed those late nights, talking about your future. He always spoke about your future, how you would be together. Yet when you told him you love him, he just said thank you. 

He was your first love.

And they always said you’ll always love your first love.

It irked you how true it was. 

Ever since you came back, seeing how Angel grew up after all these years, the love you had for him resurfaced and it grew stronger. But you weren’t willing to take the risk. Angel never seemed interested to rekindle your relationship till recently. At times, before this whole thing when you would share a bed, you would watch Angel sleep. He had no worries in the world and had to always be touching you while you were asleep. His arms and legs didn’t have to be around you, at times, his fingertips were just touching your arm and he was good. Or his arm would be against yours as he slept on his stomach and it helped his craving to be always touching you.

Angel wasn’t sure when it started, maybe it was after the first time you two shared a bed, but regardless, Angel craved your touch. It was his love language. 

“We’d be married by now with at least three kids.” Angel’s answer was so firm and sure. 

You grinned, shaking your head. “Yeah? You’re so confident about this.”

“Listen, just because we broke up or we were young, it doesn’t mean our relationship was nothing. I knew that I wanted you for the rest of my life then and it hasn’t changed now. You came back to Santo Padre in your own accord and I knew that meant that this was our second chance and I wasn’t going to fuck it up.” Angel took your hand in his, intertwining it. “I know you’re not ready, I know the wounds he left you are still fresh, but I’ll wait. I’m inpatient, but you’re worth the wait. So all these doubts in your mind? About me not wanting damage goods or your choice to not rekindle previous relationships? That’s well and fine, but I’m here to shut those thoughts down.” He didn’t want to tell you he loves you, not yet. He would wait because he knew when things became too much, your default was to just freeze everything out.

“I’m scared.”

“You have no reason to be.”

And you wanted to believe him, but it was going to take time. You just hoped he didn’t get tired of waiting.

=================

As soon as you stepped through the door, Angel was all over you. Once you managed to lock the door, he picked you up, your legs wrapping around his body. He made his way to your room, softly placed you on the bed. He unbuckled his belt and removed it, your eyes never leaving him. Biting your lip, you stood up and maneuvered him to sit down. Unbuttoning his pants, you kissed him, pulling away so you could help him remove his jeans and boxers. Once they were pooled around his ankles, you got on your knees, wrapping your hand on his cock, your thumb spreading the precum on the tip of his cock. Spitting down at his cock, moving your hand up and down causing Angel to close his eyes. You proceeded to give a few kitten licks on the head of his cock before you engulfed it in your mouth. 

Angel groaned, holding your hair together as he watched you hollow your cheeks as you moved up and down his length. His eyes rolled to the back of his head, moaning out your name. 

“Fuck baby, you look so fucking hot like this.” You moved away from him, sliding your hand up and down his hard length. You take him all the way in, swallowing around him making Angel groan once again. He was trying hard not to fuck your mouth, but you were making it difficult. Dipping your tongue at the slit on the top of his length, Angel caught the smirk on your face as he lost himself watching you engulf his length back into your mouth. Using both your hands and mouth, Angel laid back on your bed, his hand wrapped around your hair, guiding you up and down. The moans that he was letting out was turning you on, you could feel just how wet you were. Knowing you brought such pleasure to Angel, it made you feel good. “Shit, I’m coming.” You took him in deeper, Angel fucking your mouth, groaning out your name as he came. 

You let him go with a pop, you smirked as some of his cum seeped from the corner of your mouth before you put it back inside, swallowing it. 

“You’re such a good girl,” Angel sat up, his hand still entangled in your hair. He bent down and captured your lips with his, you moaned as you felt him slightly tug your hair, his lips hovering over yours. “Daddy should reward you for being so good.”

“Please daddy,” you were giving Angel total control tonight. You could always be a brat, but tonight, Angel could have you.

Standing up, you stepped away from him to remove your skirt. Your hand was at the hem of your shirt, but you hesitated. Angel saw your hesitation and he gave you a small smile.

“You don’t have to take it off baby girl, you can keep it on.” He didn’t want to make you uncomfortable. He wanted to make you feel good. The last thing he wanted was for you to worry about your scars.

You bit your lip and took off your shirt. Angel’s smile widened as he saw your body for the first time. You took off your bra and threw it at him. He laughed and caught you when you jumped on him, wrapping your arms around his neck, pressing your lips together. One of your hands went back down to his length, moving your hand up and down wants again.

“Does daddy want his pussy wrapped around his dick?” Your lips hovered over his lips, smiling as Angel was catching his breath, his attention obviously on the sensations he felt around his length.

“Yeah baby girl, let me get my pussy.”

You positioned yourself above him, slowly sliding down his length. Moaning as your pussy stretched to accommodate him. Throwing your head back, your fingers digging into his shoulders, nails digging in on his skin.

“You’re so big daddy, it feels so fucking good.” You whimpered out as he bottomed out. 

Angel looked down at where you two were connected, biting his lips as he waited for you to adjust. You moved up and down, your walls clenching around him making Angel moan your name out.

“Baby, stop clenching my dick.” He chuckled, kissing you to help you relax.

“Sorry,” you smiled sheepishly.

Guiding you to move up and down his cock, Angel watched your face, memorizing every facial expression you had.

“You feel so fucking good baby, tight, wet, always ready for daddy.” Angel whispered against your ear. 

Your pace was slow, the burn Angel provided was basically imprinted in your mind. Ever since you two slept together, you haven’t slept with anyone and your dildo, vibrators, definitely did not compare to him, but gain, you would never let Angel know that. Angel’s fingers came in contact with your scar and you slightly froze. Before he could lose you, Angel cupped your face, brought your lips down to his. 

“Don’t, stay with me.” He thrusted up into you, your brain fogging as the overwhelming pleasure Angel was giving distracted you. Watching Angel as he licked his thumb, he pressed it against your clit, even adding greater pleasure to you. Increasing your pace, you used his shoulder as leverage as you moved up and down his length, walls clenching around him. “You’re safe, you’re with me and I would never let anything happen to you.” 

One arm was around his neck, his hand cupping his face. Your lips were above his, your breath mixing as you chased your high. Angel rubbed your clit, biting his lips as he watched you bounce on his length. 

“Yeah baby girl, daddy can feel it.” Angel latched his mouth around your breast, his tongue swirling around your nipple.

“Daddy, oh my god, just like that.” 

You threw your head back, black stars filling your vision. Both of your arms were around Angel, your walls still spasming around him. Angel peppered your skin with kisses, sucking on a few spots on your neck that was sure to make a mark. 

“You were talking so much shit not too long ago and now look at you.” Angel smacked your ass, making you yelp, biting your lip. “Have to stop fighting the inevitable querida.” He grabbed your ass, grinding you down against him. 

“You’re so determined about us.”

“I’m confident in every aspect of my life, especially when it comes to you.” 

You laughed at his comment, which turned into a choked moan when you felt Angel thrust up into you. 

“Can you get on your hands and knees for me?” He questioned, making sure you were comfortable. He wanted to show you that your scars, they were nothing to be ashamed of. It didn’t change you. He would never force you out of your comfort zone, especially about something that truly traumatized you.

“Okay.”

“Put your chest on the bed.”

You did as Angel instructed. You rested your chest against the bed, you turned your head so you could see Angel. He was looking at your back, no trace of disgust in his eyes. For once, you didn’t feel judged, scrutinized or even pitied. He just looked at your scars as if he was memorizing them.

“Angel,” you called out to him, bringing him back to you. “Come back to me.”

Angel was mesmerized by her scars. Thinking of how many times Carmelo must have hurt you, what he used to inflict such damning scars on your back. And that carved ‘C’ on your back, he tried not to focus on Carmelo’s actions, not wanting to lose himself right now, but he was angry he wasn’t there to protect you. It seemed irrational, he wasn’t part of your life then, but if remained a part of your life, Carmelo would have never been able to harm you. All he could think about was covering these bad memories up, a design to show you that with every scar, every hurt he caused and every tear you shed, there was life after and while he could never make you forget what occurred, he would build new memories to show you that you were worth it, that you were beautiful.

That you were loved.

“Sorry baby.” He kissed your back. Angel took his length in his hand, moving it up and down your slit, and pressing it against your clit, teasing you. When he finally slid in, you both groaned, your hands gripping the sheets. “Daddy’s too big, huh?”

You nodded your head, biting your lip drawing blood. At times you wondered what would have happened if you slept with Angel. You’re certain he improved his skills over the years, but fuck, you would have been addicted. And there was no shame, Angel’s stroke game was strong.

“Didn’t hear your answer,” Angel stopped moving, only the tip of his cock inside of you.

“Yes, you’re too big daddy, but I love how you stretch me out.” You gripped the tip of his cock, Angel groaning and pushing back in. You hummed, content that he was buried inside you once again. 

Angel slid in and out of you, slow, deep. His slow pace was driving you crazy. You knew he was trying to restrain himself, savoring the moment as best as he could. He heard you sigh, leaning down so his front was against your back. He moved his hands from your hips to your hands that was gripping the sheets. He intertwined your hands, placing small kisses on your upper back before moving to your neck, nipping at your skin, earning tiny moans from you as he stilled inside you again. This wouldn’t be the last time you two would be intimate, but with everything that has occurred, he was just reveling at the moment. 

“Daddy, please go faster.” You pleaded, gasping as he began to pound into you.

“Like this querida?” He moved one hand to wrap around your neck, slightly pulling you back so you were slightly lifted off the bed, while his other hand remained on yours. Angel began pounding in and out of you, the pressure he had on your neck was just the perfect added sensation. 

You moaned out his name, his hand gripping yours along with the sheets. His lips was beside your ear, grunting as continued to pound into you.

“You look so fucking beautiful.” He coaxed. He felt your walls clenching him, your impending orgasm 

“Angel,” the way you whimpered his name, it was intoxicating. It was embedded and his memories, a sound he wanted to head over and over again.

“You ready to cream daddy’s dick?” Angel was close as well, that familiar feeling at the pit of his stomach was there. His pace became stuttered, continuing to pound into you.

“Yes daddy.” 

Angel moved the hand against your throat down your front until he reached your tiny nub, the one that’s been screaming for attention. Wetting it with your own combined juices, he rubbed your clit, your orgasm almost came instantly. You cried out his name, your volume would sure have the neighbors aware of what was occurring. Angel came after you, his throbbing cock stilling inside you as he coated your walls. You felt your legs shaking as you came down from this high. Angel slipped out of you, his come seeping out. He smacked your ass, causing you to moan, but that’s all you could do. You were spent in the best fucking way.

Angel kissed his way up your body, turning your head to face him when he got to the top. He kissed you, turning your body so that you were on your back. Cupping your face, the way he caressed made the butterflies in your stomach go crazy.

“So you gonna quit playin’ and be my girl?” Angel pulled away from you long enough to ask before kissing you again. 

This man’s lips were sinful.

Hell, everything about Angel Reyes was sinful.

How was he going to kiss you after asking that? 

You sighed, pulling away so his lips hovered above yours. Opening your eyes, you met Angel’s intense stare and caressed his face with your hand. 

“I thought I was already your girl?” You teased, closing the gap between you for a quick kiss. “Are you sure about this?”

“I am, are you?” Angel wanted it to be your choice. If you needed more time, he would give that to you. 

You moved the back of your hand against Angel’s cheek, his brown eyes looking at you, waiting for your answer. The fact Angel always put the ball on your table, it was different and much appreciated. 

“Yes, I am.”

=================

You sat beside your co-worker at work, watching the clock so it would go faster and you could go to lunch. You were at the clinic today and you had a surge in the morning, but currently, you had no patients. Trying your best not to yawn, you hold it in and check your phone. Angel’s name popped up and you smiled.

Favorite Roomie 🍆😏 ‘You want some meat for lunch? 😏’

You cackled. 

‘Mmm, feeling veggies today.’

You placed your phone down feeling eyes on you. Looking over, you found your work bestie, Jasmine giving you a knowing look.

“What?” You asked.

“What did BD want?”

“BD?” You were confused by her abbreviation.

“Big dick.”

“Jas!” You playfully smack her. “He’s just being a little shit.” Lifting up your phone, Angel’s reply made you cackle once again.

Favorite roomie 🍆😏

Stop being a little shit, you a rabbit? I know your kind of rabbit. 😏 But for real, what do you want from Wendy’s? I’m in line.

You furrowed your eyebrows.

��Nuggets and fries, and a frosty.’ ‘Also, how did you know it’s lunch?’

Placing your phone down again, Jasmine shook her head. “You two have been dating for how long now?”

“Two months?” You couldn’t believe the two months passed as quickly as it did. One day you were just roommates, the next he basically moved into your room and the next, he was your boyfriend. The adjustment hasn’t been difficult at all. Angel was always very affectionate, but the biggest difference was the intimacy. The kisses, the sex, and just the sweet little things he would do for you.

“You know it’s been a year at this point. He was just waiting for Adam to be gone and boom, slid in.” Jasmine was ecstatic for you. She was the first friend you made in Santo Padre. When you told her you lived with Angel Reyes, she applauded you. She knew of Angel’s reputation, it was hard to not know about the Mayans. From her friends who had slept with Angel, she heard nothing but raving reviews. And besides that, it seemed that Angel was a solid guy, nice, but ghosted them afterwards. But then when you spoke to her about Angel, the things he did, even she knew he was in love. Then she witnessed your interactions at the Mayans Clubhouse or the BBQ’s you two held at your place, she knew it was only a matter of time.

Picking up your phone, Angel had replied.

Favorite roomie 🍆😏

I literally eat lunch with you every fucking day. You always play like I don’t know you.😒🤔 A creature of habit.  Got it baby.  You got time to suck daddy’s dick though? 🤔 Also, did you change my motherfucking name on your phone?

You choked on the water you were drinking, shaking your head. Angel has been changing his name on your phone to future husband and you would change it back to your favorite roomie. Ezekiel was named future brother in law, which surprised you.

‘You’re too damn much.’ ‘Hmm, since you’re bringing me food, sure.’ ‘I’m not saying you don’t know me, I just didn’t think you’d keep on track of that.’ ‘Of course I did, you’re my favorite roomie.’

“Did you tell him that you got a job offer in LA from Pierre?” 

Pierre, your ED doctor friend/mentor, lived in LA predominantly and did a few shifts in Santo Padre as some community outreach. He worked at Cedars Sinai and got you a job, which was amazing since Cedars Sinai was at the center of LA and you could learn so much more.

“No, I mean, I doubt I’m going to take it.” You shrugged. 

“It’s Cedars Sinai, it would open opportunities for you.” Jasmine knew why you were hesitant, but this opportunity didn’t come by often.

You opened your mouth to reply, but Angel’s voice startled you.

“Give me your phone. Favorite roomie.” He scoffed, extending his hand towards you.

“Boy, you’re not just going to demand shit without at least saying hello.” Jasmine scolded.

Angel held his hands up. “Sorry Jas, hello, how you doing, I got you some nuggets from Wendy’s.” He handed her the bag of food he got for her. “Come on baby, phone.”

“Angel, it’s not my break yet.”

“Yes it is, it’s 12:30 on the dot. Let’s go.”��

Jasmine chuckled. “Better listen to the asshole over here.”

“That’s right. Listen to me, let’s go.”

You rolled your eyes before hugging Jasmine. Taking your phone, you followed Angel to the van and went to the back where Angel usually set up a blanket for you two to sit in and fool around if you had time.

Settling on the blanket, you take out your food and your mouth watered. “You’re the best babe.” 

“Yeah I know,” he leaned over to give you a kiss and grabbed your phone. He unlocked your phone, keeping your phone away as you tried to grab it. “If you change this shit one more fucking time, I’m going to cuff your hands and edge you.”

You gave Angel an incredulous look, pushing him. “Angel, why do you keep changing it? Are you not my favorite roomie.”

“I’m not your fucking roommate, I’ve been upgraded to boyfriend.” Angel scoffed. He didn’t want to be offended by your constant need to change his name on your phone. He figured it was some weird defensive mechanism you had since you were the worst with change. He was surprised you had decided to move to LA, but he realized that you grew up in Los Angeles and moved to Santo Padre at the beginning of high school. He remembered how closed off you were and didn’t really open up till sophomore year and once you did, you and Angel clicked. 

“Should I put favorite boyfriend then?” You teased him. The word husband had such certainty to it. You two had just begun dating. Sure, you two dated in high school and you two have been roommates for years, but that didn’t equal immediate marriage.

“Or you can stop playing and put future husband.” Angel rolled his eyes as he took a bite from his burger, shoving a few pieces of fries in his mouth. “We have a party at the clubhouse later, what time should I come get you?”

“Come get me? Angel, I’m not going. I’m going out with Jas, you know this.” You took a bite of your nuggets, leaning against the van. “And don’t even say bring her to the clubhouse, we’ve been planning this for weeks.” Captain Marvel came out and you and Jas had been planning to see it since it was announced.

“Shit, that’s right. Stop by afterward?” He suggested. Being with you was easy for Angel. Eating lunch with you every day, cooking with you at home, grocery shopping, cuddling, laundry, fucking, building furniture you get for the apartment, and fucking, it was all easy for Angel. What he was finding difficult was when you would be lost in your own world, or revert back to just putting this distance between you two as just friends. A few nights ago, you had locked the door and he came home late, he knocked on your door till you finally answered, and you were slightly irate then apologized for locking the door on him. 

“Okay.” 

You two ate in silence, both of your attention mostly on your Instagrams. Angel didn’t like this type of silence between you two since it was just awkward. You two could usually talk about random topics, but as of late, if you two were together, you would occupy yourself with your cell phone. 

“You’re serious about us, right?” The insecurities Angel had screamed at him on the daily. His feeling of inadequacy stemming from him being in the shadow of his younger brother. The love he never felt from his own father, being second best. His mother tried her best and Angel felt she did love him, but his father was a different story. With the hesitancy and the hot and coldness you presented towards Angel, it frustrated him. While he was sure of his feelings for you, he felt that while you seemed present in the relationship a majority of the time, there were times where it seemed like you two weren’t together, that you two were just friends. He felt like he was your fuck buddy. 

You gave him an incredulous look and raised an eyebrow. “Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” You understood Angel’s questions in some way. You could be hot and cold, which made you feel terrible, but it was hard not to be. Keeping a distance between you two was the safer option for now. 

“I don’t know Y/N. At times, I feel like you’re just not in it. We literally eat together every day, so why ask me how I know it’s your lunchtime? You keep changing my name on your phone and girls usually find that shit cute. You know, I just don’t understand why you have this wall up between us. I’m committed to us, I’ve been committed.”

A frown appeared on your face, not liking how you made Angel feel. It wasn’t on purpose. You did this with almost every man you dated or boyfriend after Carmelo. If you didn’t get incredibly attached, you wouldn’t miss red flags like you did with Carmelo. Keeping yourself above the water, and alert, you wouldn’t have to worry about falling back into such blindness.

“It’s not on purpose. I told you, damaged goods remember?” You could feel his intense eyes trained on you, while your eyes remained on the nuggets on your lap. “Maybe this is too soon? Or I’m just not ready.”

“You fucking dated Adam.” Angel let out in frustration. 

“Yes but Adam doesn’t have any added complications with him. I had fun and my only worry is basically just my job. There was no stress with him because,” you paused, trying to form the right words. “I didn’t love Adam, he was fun to have around and I never had to worry about losing myself with him. But with you, every time I’m around you, I find myself falling even greater. If we ever broke up, I would lose our friendship. If I lost myself in this relationship, I may not catch red flags like I did with Carmelo.” The seriousness of this conversation was weighing heavy on you. You didn’t want to have this conversation during a fucking lunch break. “Fuck, can we please talk about this later? This isn’t the right place for this.”

“Nope, you’re going to find some way to ghost me. You don’t think I’m afraid of that too? You’re not fucking damaged goods, stop saying that. What Carmelo did to you was despicable, but look where you are now. You’re an amazing woman. You are also a woman who wears her heart on her sleeves and gives her all.” Angel watched as you fidgeted with your fingers, moving your food every once in a while. “I understand why you’re hesitant mi cielo, but, I’m not Carmelo and I never will be Carmelo. I’m in this relationship for the long run, I have no thoughts about us breaking up or anything fucking ridiculous like that. Open your heart to me Y/N, I’ve never hurt you once.”

“You said thank you.” The night of prom was still so fresh in your mind. You knew then that you and Angel weren’t going to last much longer.

“What?”

“When I told you I love you, you said thank you.” You smiled sadly, closing your food and placing it on the bag. “I should go, my break is over.”

Angel watched as you exited the van.

“Fuck!” He yelled out. 

He said thank you because he knew you two were going to separate. If he acknowledged his feelings for you, if he told you he loved you, he wouldn’t be able to let you go. 

And now, of course it would bite him on the ass. 

=================

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[redledsandharrystyles]

Best friends - Luke Patterson x Fem!Reader

Summary: Y/n and Luke have always been best friends, but one night he isnt answering your texts and you get a little worried. What you see when you open up the door to his room, might just change your friendship.

Warnings: Swearing, smut, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it, kids!) Lots and LOTS of spelling errors. I dont think there are any more...

Word count: 2767 words

Authors note: Its literally been so long since I've written ANYTHING, especially smut, and English isn't my first language so go easy on me please.

____________________

You were making your way up the stairs to your best friends room. It was currently 10PM, and he wasn't responding to your texts, making your worries increase, since he usually didn't take more than 10 minutes to respond, and he didn't go to sleep until at least 2AM. The TV downstairs was on, since his parents were watching the news in silence, and you knocked on his door.

No response.

You knocked again, but the only thing you could hear were muffled moans, which just made you even more worried. What if he was hurt? And he couldn't call for help, or reach his phone. Or what if he's unconscious. Then, you heard your name. Once. Twice. You let out a sigh, and opened the door. The room was dark, with only the moon lighting up the room. You carefully walked towards his bed that was pushed up against the cream walls, and saw him laying there, peacefully. Letting out a sigh of relief, you sat down, placing your head into the palm of your hands. Of course, the small amount of sleep he got every night would catch up to him eventually. But then you heard it again. Your name. Leaving his lips in a sinful manner. He kept moving around on his bed, his forehead sweaty. Was he having a nightmare?

You softly shook his shoulder, but he wouldn't budge. So you shook it again, but a little harder, making him shake his head. "Luke," You murmured, shaking him again. "Luke, wake up." He finally opened his eyes, rubbing his face with his large hands. "Y/n? What are you doing here?" He said as he reached for the lamp that sat on his nightstand, turning it on. You shook your head, "I got worried, since you weren't answering my texts. Stupid, I know. I wouldn't have woken you up, but you kept saying my name, so I thought you were having a nightmare or something..." You trailed off, seeing his face flush. "Y-yeah, n-no, I'm fine. I wasn't having a nightmare." He scratched his neck, which had now also turned a deep shade of pink. "What? Then wh-" Your eyes trailed down his body, spotting the lump in his sheets by his crotch area. "Oh. Oh!" You turned your head away, quickly standing up, and flattening down your skirt. "U-uhm." You weren't able to look him in the eye, your gaze moving from the electric guitar that was leaning against his wall, towards his desk, and lastly, the dirty laundry that sat on a chair by his window. You could hear movement behind you, but you still stood awkwardly in the middle of his room, your cheeks flushed, and your hands fidgeting with the hem of your skirt.

"I-I'm sorry, Y/n, It's not like it was on purpose. I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. I swear, i have no control over this. You're my best friend, and I really dont want this to change the way things are between us. B-but you're just so beautiful it's hard not to fantasize about- no, I mean you're really pretty so of course it happens sometimes. N-Not that this has happened more than once! I- I just-" You cut off his rambling with your hand over his mouth, making him exhale, and shut his eyes. "I know how dreams work, Luke. I know you have no control over them. I'd be lying if I said I've never had those type of dreams about you, y'know." His eyes opened in an instant as you realized what you had just said. He placed his hand over yours, moving it away from his mouth. "R-really?" Your eyes widened as you moved away from him. "I-I think I should go. My parents are probably waiting for me to get back and I dont want to worry them-" You quickly turned towards the door which lead to his room, hearing him sigh as he plopped onto his bed. Your hand hovered above the doorknob, but you sighed quietly, plucking up every ounce of courage, you turned back around, leaning against the wooden door. "Unless you need some help." You screwed your eyes shut, waiting for his response, your hands intertwined behind your back.

"W-What?" He propped up his elbows, leaning against them. You shook away your nerves, and slowly, seductively, walked over to his bed. "I asked if you needed help," you placed yourself on his lap so you were straddling his thighs. "With that." You pointed towards his member which still hasn't softened. He visibly gulped, and slowly nodded. You raised a brow, "Use your words." You purred, leaning closer towards him. "I-I might need some help." He stuttered, leaning back until his head landed on the soft mattress. You bent over in order to reach his neck. Nibbling at the soft skin, he let out a soft moan. You moved your lips down to his collarbone, sucking there, then blowing on the purple mark you left. You sat back up and slowly grinded on him, a groan escaping his lips which sent shocks to your core. His hands moved from his sides to your hips, making you grind a little faster, until another moan left his lips. You, once again, leaned into him, but now aiming for his lips. You brushed your lips against his, your tongue sweeping over his bottom lip, asking him for access, your tongues softly moving against each others. Pulling away for air, he sat up, with you still straddling him. "Tell me about your dream." You cooed into his ear, his grip on your hips tightening. "What?" You looked him in the eye, your hands trailing up his chest, tugging at his shirt, signaling for him to take it off. Then wrapping your hands around the back of his neck. "What was I doing in your dreams, that made you moan my name?," You asked, one hand trailing up into his hair, softly tugging at it, while you tugged at his bottom lip with your teeth. "Were you fucking my mouth?" You nipped at the spot right below his ear, grinding onto his member, a sinful moan leaving his plump lips that went straight to your core, and you then realized how truly wet he had gotten you. "Were you fucking me into the mattress?" You pulled at his hair, and his hips bucked into yours, making your breathing hitch. "Maybe you were bending me over your desk... fucking me from behind, or maybe spanking me." His hold on your hips was so hard he was probably leaving bruises.

"Oh, fuck me." He rasped, "You have to tell me, Luke, what were we doing?" You purred into his ear, your fingers trailing down his muscular abdomen. You looked him in the eye as your hand softly grabbed at his member, his lips parting as you rubbed him through his pants. "Please, Y/n." He whined, his head now resting in the crook of your neck, his breathing heavy, and his chest moving at a fast pace. "Tell me what you want baby." You muttered into his ear,

His hot breath on your skin caused a chill to run down your spine. "I- Y-you were, uhm, sucking me off. Th-then you started riding me." You smirked, and pulled his head from the crook of your neck, and kissed him, starting off slow. You pulled away so you could take off your shirt, now showing off your lacy bra. You then cupped his face, your lips now moving at a faster pace against his. His hands moving up your body towards your breasts, squeezing them through your bra, then moving down to your waist. Pulling away from your mouth, he moved his lips now towards your collarbone, creating a trail of hickeys from your neck to the swell of your breasts. You arched into him, a moan leaving your lips, and you could feel his member harden under your core. "Luke." You moaned, your fingers tugging at his brown locks of hair, he groaned into your neck, as he sucked at the sensitive skin. As amazing as his lips on you felt, you knew you had to at least give him something from his dream, so you pulled away, standing up from his lap. He whined as you moved towards the end of the bed. "Oh come on, Y/n, you can't just tease me like this, this hurts." He said as he pointed at his crotch, making you giggle.

"Did you forget what I was going to do to you?" You said, leaning over the bed, giving him a perfect view of your tits. He looked confused for a second, before his eyes widened. "Y-you were being serious? I-"

"Of course I was, now come here." He moved towards the end of the bed, and you sunk down onto your knees in front of him, looking up into his eyes as you pulled down his grey sweatpants, making him lift his hips. It took you by surprise when you saw he wasn't wearing a pair of underwear underneath the sweatpants, but you grinned nonetheless, licking your lips. You started off by spitting into your hand, then you wrapped your hands around his member, forming a fist. You heard his breathing hitch as soon as you made contact with his skin, but then you started moving. Your fist going up and down at a slow pace. Luke had put his hands onto his sides for support, his head thrown back in pleasure. He moaned out your name, as he fisted his bed sheets. You then licked our lips again, and wrapped your lips around the tip of his cock, an even louder moan escaping his lips. You slowly sunk lower into his member, his breathing now consisting of short pants. You had now taken all of him into your mouth, the tip of our nose brushing against his lower abdomen, and the tip of his cock brushing against the back of your throat. You gagged around him, trying to swallow him, "Oh, fuck." He muttered, his head turned down as he watched you bob your head up and down. "Fuck princess, look at me." Your stomach churned at the pet name, your wetness pooling in your underwear. You looked up into his eyes as you continued bobbing your head, swallowing every once in a while, one of your hands grabbing his thigh, while the other played with his balls. You hallowed your cheeks, and he bucked his hips, making you gag, "I-I'm sorry, sorry, I'm sorry," he repeated, a moan following soon after. His right hand went to the back of your head, tangling itself in your hair, as his left hand supported his upper body. He wasn't pushing your head down, just guiding it. You swirled your tongue across the tip of his dick, and fondled his balls again. "Fuck, I'm going to cum. Fuck, fuck, fuck," He screwed his eyes shut as he threw his head back. You pulled your mouth off of him, making him whine, but your hand kept going, just at a slow pace. "Where do you want to cum?" He opened his eyes, raising a brow. "What do you mean?" He asked, biting back a moan, trying to hold back. "Do you want to cum in my mouth? On my face? Perhaps my tits?" You asked, looking up at him with innocent eyes, your fist still moving up and down on his member. "Fuck, you're so dirty." He chuckled, so you softly squeezed his shaft, making his laugh cut off with a moan. "Your mouth, I want your mouth." He pleaded, and you smirked, wrapping your lips around him again, and bobbing your head up and down. Feeling him twitch in your mouth, "Shit, baby I'm going to-" You quickened your pace, both of your hands trailing up his thighs and up to his abs, scratching softly, then trailing back down, and softly squeezing the base if his member. With one final moan, he came. Swallowing his cum, and pulling your mouth off, saliva running down your chin. His hooded eyes looked down at your reddened lips, loving how swollen they currently were after what you just did. "Holy shit." He groaned, falling back onto the mattress, and you let out a soft giggle. "That was perfect. You- You're perfect." he said, tucking your messy hair behind your ear, and pulling your bottom lip down with his thumb. Cupping your face, he pulled you towards him, his lips meeting yours, then pulling on your bottom lip with his teeth, making you moan softly. "Were not done. Theres still one thing that happened, that we still havent done." You teased, your lips brushing against his, pulling back and looking into his eyes. "Really, and what's tha-" he cut himself off with a moan as you ran your fingers across his member.

You pulled down your skirt, and underwear, then unclasped your bra, making Luke's eyes widen, his gaze fixated on your chest. You straddled him, moving closer to his ear, "I'm going to ride you, remember?" You purred, your hand wrapping around his member, making it harden again. You then, slammed your hips down, sinking down onto his cock, making you both groan. Your fingers were digging into his shoulders, and his were digging into your hips. Your head fell forward into his left shoulder, and you lifted your hips again, making him shudder beneath you. When you slammed back down, he let out a louder moan than before, making you silence him with your mouth, "You have to be quiet baby, your parents are home." He nodded, leaning his forehead into yours. You started bouncing on his member, setting a steady pace, moans and grunts leaving your mouths. His hands moved from your hips to the curve of your ass, gripping it harshly, then slapping it, making your lips part and a loud moan escape. His lips were right beside your ear, so when you slammed your hips back down, the sinful sound he made went straight to your core making you arch your back. "Fuck, Luke." You moaned into his ear, your thighs burning. He grunted, "Hell, I cant do this." Then he flipped you over, making you land on your back int top of the mattress, ending up in a missionary position. He inserted him self into you once again, loud noises leaving the both of you as you arched your back. He shifted his position, grabbing your leg and placing it on his shoulder, allowing him to bury his cock deeper in you. Your breathing was getting heavier, and you snaked one hand towards your clit, desperate for a release. You started rubbing your fingers against your clit in circular motions, but when Luke noticed, he grabbed both your hands and pinned them above your head, leaving you a whining mess. He replaced your fingers with his thumb, repeating the circular motion, you arched your back again, your chest pressing against his. You felt a knot form in your lower abdomen, "Luke, I'm gonna cum," You cried out, making him quicken his pace. His hips slamming into yours, the sound of skin on skin, and the headboard banging against the wall making you feel even more aroused. The knot tightening in your stomach as he pressed his lips onto yours. You repeated his name over and over again, begging for permission to cum. "Hold it, princess." You cried out as he put pressure on your clit with his thumb, "Fuck, you feel so good around me, baby. I'm going to cum," he panted, pressing his forehead to your chest as he slammed his hips into yours,  the tip of his cock repeatedly hitting your g-spot. "Please, Luke, I can't-"

"Let go for me." He grunted into your ear, and snapped his hips one last time, before you both came. You attached your lips to his in order to silence you both as you rode out your highs. Luke sucked into your collarbone, before pulling out, and plopping down next to you. You were both breathing heavily, your chest heaving up and down, your bodies covered in a thin layer of sweat. "Fuck, did we use a condom?" He asked, sheer panic laced in his voice, you chuckled, wrapping your hand around his waist, placing your head on his sweaty chest. "I'm on the pill." He breathed out a sigh of relief.

[ofcowardiceandkings]

UH WHOA not only am i posting art but theres so much of it lmfao

ive been meaning to do this for mmmm a long time, and i decided to get it cleaned up so i can present folks with my homebrew/headcanon/thingy for the d&d playable races !! i know ive missed a few off but these are ones ive seen more of over all in my own travels in Nerd Game lol

ive only DMed one thing so far (our lost mines of phandelver adventure was a total blast but oh boy the shenanigans) but im like ... drowning in it all, have been for a loooonng time since i first played Neverwinter Nights when i was like 11, i just didnt have a party to mess with yet lmao (fingers crossed our schedules get sorted so the campaign goes ahead soooooonnn).. so ive been developing some of these various homebrewy headcanons for uh over half my life

getting them all together in one place like this was unbelievably fun !!

gonna yell under the cut for a bit about it more but very shortly i’ll be opening for d&d character / item / creature commissions so watch this space or pop me a message to get in a queue <3

these headcanon things are half based on “that looks cool” and Sciencing. a lot of the more humanoid in some way races ive really pulled on human ancestors a lot, as well as muscle development in different sports. And Animals, because ye

i haven’t included humans in this mammoth endeavour because we should all know what a Human People looks like, and their proportions aren’t any different in the world of D&D i run at least lol similarly, because they’re an exact intersection between humans & either elves or orcs, the half-species arent included on here either [shrugs] i WILL talk about them some here though !!

i might eventually update this with some npc generators ive made using my own descriptors and headcanons >.>

ELVES av height; 5′6 | heads-high; 8.5 generally long limbed, with fine wispy hair, elves senses are very heightened. helping in this, their eyes are almond-shaped with slightly narrow pupils, their large radar-like ears are very mobile, and the underside of their noses are covered in a lightly damp pitted leather. part of their ability to maintain grace with an elongated frame, aside from longer springy feet, is aided by a tail built somewhat like a horse, with a skirt of hair down its length, only with a slightly longer bone to it than would be seen in the typical pony. excepting a very light dusting on their lower limbs, they typically have very little body hair. sometimes their skin shimmers, or freckles sparkle.

GNOME av height; 3′6 | heads-high; 6.5  gnomes are almost like diminutive elves with a few key differences. their hair tends to be wild if left alone, but is often styled wildly anyway. set rather low on rounded but long faces, their large almond eyes are keen, and small hands very nimble. it’s not sure if its due to their close environments or frequent encounters with accidents in experiments, but their skulls are surprisingly hard, and they possess small horn nubs made of bone and coated in keratin. their small petal-shaped ears are set low and point outward, and are able to move a little to catch sound. they may look fragile due to their size and build but they are pretty hardy and more than capable.

HALFLING av height; 3′ | heads-high; 6 a very hardy but soft and welcoming folk, halflings are built for walking and surviving well, often coming from a semi-nomadic tradition. they typically have round faces with stronger jaws and soft round eyes, and their large ears are pointed upright. their figures easily get a little curved and chubby, especially when they have easy access to decent food, in preparation for harder times and the odd period of hunkering down for some downtime, say in poor weather. truly the most functional part of a halfling is their short powerful legs with big fairly flexible hard feet, and lion-like tail for balance, both insulated by hair.

DWARF av height; 4′3 | heads-high; 6.5 dwarves are accustomed to life in tougher terrain, typically with large parts spent in the ground. their broad frames are also squat down with thick short limbs, for huge power and for life in tunnels. wide feet keep them steady and sensitive to significant seismic energy in the earth, and wide hands aid in their work and the feel of the rock. their large round ears stick outward and are slightly mobile, large noses help condition the air, and high-set eyes with huge irises aid their vision in darker spaces and the ability to peek over things without being fully exposed. their skulls are also very thick just in case of falling rocks. all dwarves are very hairy and grow beards, taking pride in keeping and styling it.

GOLIATH av height; 7′6 | heads-high; 10 a totally different variety of rock & mountain people to dwarves, they do share a few traits. a goliath’s thick limbs are long with a big reach and huge stride, with big hands and feet for steady movement. as well as being hugely tall, they are broad, especially in their shoulders, with a long neck elevating their head further. their facial features tend to be very sharp, but long. they have little to no body hair, and they often dont grow head hair either, but decorate their skulls with tattoos. as they get older, the upper surfaces of their body develop pebble like growths under the skin, often in similar patterns to their habitats.

FIRBOLG av height; 7′6 | heads high; 9 firbolg typically live in deep forests but are actually a giantkin - although not too unbelievable given their huge height and thick build. large parts of their body are hairy, nearly furry, and their head hair is thick and wild, and they often have facial hair too. their large heads have long thick noses with an almost bovine leather to their top lips, and wide set eyes. their fluffy ears are very mobile, but when relaxed they drop and point downward. their nails are thick and sturdy, aiding in being even more dexterous while being so big. sometimes they are covered in layers of clothing, but they possess a tiny goat-like tail.

DRAGONBORN av height; 6′6 | heads-high; 8 dragonborns diverged from true dragons in the ancient past, likely due to a strong magical influence of some kind, but not so long ago that the bloodlines of dragons are absent from the race of dragonborn. (the illustration shows the typical head-shape and placement of ears, each bloodline has its own features). their chest is still very round like an animal, with deep chest muscles, a slightly less mobile shoulder, and short upper arm. their 4 clawed hands and feet somewhat resemble that of a true dragon, but smaller and a little less dangerous. the length of a dragonborn’s tail can vary from just the length from hips to floor, or up to their full height, and as well as being very useful for balance and dexterity, can be used for fighting. different bloodlines can interbreed, with it being a matter of chance which line is present in offspring (although metallic is more dominant over gemstone, and chromatic over both ... (ah yeah gemstone, ill get to that soon))

AARAKOCRA av height; 5′ | heads-high; 8.5 as an avian species, especially one capable of flight, the aarakocra’s bones are hollow, making them on the one hand very agile but a little fragile. their large wingspan nearly brushes the floor, and their wings attach high on their back, through to a deep avian keel. their arms have a long forearm, which is covered in bird-like scutes, and their 4 clawed hands are still remarkably talon like which quite short palms and very mobile thumbs. their legs are very long and powerful, and backed by a typically wedge shaped tail. more often than not, their physical appearance takes after raptor species of birds, but different populations can trend towards many different appearances, including parrots and waterfowl.

TABAXI av height; 6′6 | heads-high; 9 tabaxi are an unusual sight in many places still. their cat-like bodies are very flexible and suited to their athletic climbing lifestyle. their long hands and feet have very a powerful grip, and they can retract their front claws. their long feline face is something like a cheetah or a clouded-leopard, with large highly mobile ears, large eyes and a strong nose. 

ORC

av height; 6′6 | heads-high; 8

orcs are very powerfully build, with heavy muscles and thick bodies overall. compared to other humanoids they can look a little gorilla-like. their short legs are usually a little bent to carry weight better instead of busting knees when locked. their course wiry hair grows profusely all over their body. their strong nails often grow out a little pointed. their large thick heads have high heavy brows and protruding lower jaws, short round noses and low bud-shaped ears which stick outward. the lower jaw and sometimes upper contain tusks, sometimes multiple tusks, which are greatly cared for and very impressive.

HALF-ELVES av height; 5′6 | heads-high; 8.25 a half-elf’s build will be somewhere between human and elf, often inheriting something of an elf’s eyes and nose leather, shorter elf ears, and maybe a small tufted tail something like a rabbits

HALF-ORCS av height; 6′ | heads-high; 8 a half-orc’s build will be somewhere between human and elf, often inheriting something of an orc’s skin colour and dark and profuse wiry hair, shorter orc ears, and some small tusks.

GOBLIN av height; 4′ (stood straight) | heads high; 5.5 bat/cat-like ears, nose something like bear/cat, domed head, arms/legs same length, sparse wiry hair, claws, short digits, lithe but very strong and hardy

HOBGOBLIN av height; 5′3 (stood straight) | heads high; 8 bat/cat-like ears but pinched at the base, nose something like bear/cat, very domed head, arms slightly longer than legs, claws, sparse wiry hair, quite broad

BUGBEAR av height; 7′ (stood straight) | heads high; 7.5 bat-like ears, long domed head something like a lion/bear, arms very long, nearly totally covered in thick fur, big tusks and often fangs, very bear-like hands/feet, big claws, very broad

TRITON av height; 5′2 | heads high; 7.5 lithe but well muscled, quite streamlined for a humanoid, frilled ears, pretty flat face, fins on limbs/back, “hair” is tendrils/fins/etc, short strong legs & long arms, long webbed fingers, long flipper feet, gills along front/side of chest

YUAN-TI PUREBLOOD av height; 5′9 | heads high; 9 domed angular faces, lips are not humanoid, triangular eyes, scales, quite flat nostrils with sense pits following along underside cheekbones, very little cartilage in ear, some may have cobra hoods extending out of ear instead, very tall and thin with small hands/feet, reptilian claws

CENTAUR av height; 7′ | heads high; 10 fairly stocky pony body (usually about 4′10 at withers), very muscled front end, long neck & sloping human-shoulders, long faces with long broad noses, prominent lips, horse-like ears sticking up and out, their whole scalp can grow hair but shaved sides are common, can grow hair nearly all down human-spine

KOBOLD av height; 2′6 | heads high; 5.5 almost alligator-like head & eyes, tiny nub horns, quite animal-like chest, arms/legs same length, thick stubby tail same length of body, 4 digits with stubby claws, lithe but strong for their tiny size

KENKU av height; 4′ | heads high; 5.5 corvid features, deep chest but no keel, longer arms than legs, 4 digits with talons, hands human-like but scaled, wedge-like tail half of leg height, not-quite fully bird feet.

LIZARDFOLK av height; 6′6 | heads high; 7 iguana-like, egg-shaped head, neck wattle, line of back spines varies in height, long arms and legs, very reptilian hands and feet with long claws, elbow spikes

GRUNG av height; 3′ | heads high; 6.5 large heads, neck leads nearly directly into torso, super flexible, very long limbs, triangular body, short upper arm, shorter thigh, large hands/feet, 4 digits

LOXODON av height; 7′6 | heads high; 5.5 large head, trunk as long as torso, short legs / long arms, huge bones under thick muscle, thick skin, 4 digits with thick nails, large hands / rounded cushioned feet, v e r y broad and thick build, small tail with tuft at the end, 

TORTLE av height; 7′6 | heads-high; 7 thick wrinkled skin encased in huge shell, stooping posture with neck extending forward, very long arms & short legs, 5 digits with reptilian claws, boxy head, heart shaped from above with features set far forward, tail to balance stoop

MINOTAUR av height; 7′ | heads-high; 9 powerful build with thick bones, typically well muscled, bovine head on thick neck, often very large horns, fairly long tufted tail, big hooved feet, broad 4 digit hands with thick nails, hair length varies

PLANE THINGS ???

listen this was a lot easier in the edition i first encountered lol anyway, until anything else comes up in extra material im just applying a few square & rectangle venn diagram rules

a useful word; planetouched. i dont really know why WotC seems to have dropped that term for at least 5e (i missed 4e entirely) but it refers to a “mortal native outsider” with lineage or influence from a plane other than the material, so “a material plane native creature with non-native plane influence, which can die”

GENASI height depends on material plane parent the result of a material plane / elemental pair (usually genies). they usually take after their material parent in build and broader features, but their elemental heritage comes through in features like magical hair, bright coloured eyes, unusual body temperatures, innate magics, etc.  genasi can interbreed with themselves, and the crossing of two elements can produce some interesting results (im working on that :>)

TIEFLINGS height depends on material plane parents this is the first of the squares & rectangles, and tbh its basically canonical. a tiefling is the result of a material plane humanoid being born with fiendish* influence. the word ‘tiefling’ refers specifically to a human with fiendish influence, but is also an umbrella term for ALL fiendish planetouched creatures. these DO have some names mentioned in the play material ! fey’ri = elves, tanarukk = orcs, wisplings = halflings, maeluth = dwarves, etc. so all fiendish planetouched are tieflings, but not all tieflings are human-based. the fiendish influence can be dormant for years or just string along for decades. AnyWay, all of them have horns, most have tails, odd skin or eye colour, and others can have all sorts of extraplanar features. *(fiends are another venn diagram thing in D&D, its an umbrella term for both demons and devils) 

AASIMAR height depends on material plane parents aaand this is the second of the squares & rectangles, the not-strictly-canon one. okay duplicate what i said about tieflings, but make it about celestials not fiends, basically lmao. aasimar is an umbrella term, but also a human/celestial planetouched specifically! unlike the above, since its my homebrew concept i dont have other words specifically for other races’ celestial planetouched, but i’ll get there watch this space lol EnyHoo, they all tend to have a strange glow about them in general, but usually in their eyes, and maybe hair especially. it isnt uncommon for them to have a kind of halo around themselves, or glowing glyphs/runes/sigils on or around them either. while MOST dont have full wings, a dusting of feathers isnt unusual. the features of celestials can vary a lot more. for example, unicorns and leonals are actually celestials!

aaand the slightly odd-ball;

WARFORGED height depends on build purpose these are an interesting case, as warforged are actually constructs, brought into this world by the fusing of organic muscle (like wood or leathery material) to an inorganic shell (like stone or metal), imbuing a life-giving fluid of some sort to act like blood, and bringing life to it by a powerful ritual - a unique glyph etched into their heads. as their name suggests they are usually created to become soldiers, or other army positions, although they could be suited to other purposes. unlike most constructs, they are fully self-aware and have a mind on par with humans. they do not need sleep (but require rest) and they also do not naturally reproduce. if they live longer than their purpose, then they are turned loose to deal with the world as they wish. as they are MADE they can vary greatly depending on who made them, and for what exact purpose - although they tend to have beak-like mouths, and 3 digit hands and 2 toed feet.

AV. HEIGHT CHART FROM LEFT TO RIGHT !!! human - elf - dwarf - gnome - halfling - orc - goliath - firbolg - dragonborn - aarakocra - tabaxi - kenku - hobgoblin - bugbear - yuanti - triton - kobold - grung - lizardfolk - tortle - centaur - minotaur - loxodon

oooboy that was a lot of waffle :L

[fan-written]

I couldn't get this bio dad Riddler au by @maribat-writing-and-prompts out of my head, so my brain came up with this! You can find the original post here:

Puzzler! Marinette

Superboy landed silently next to Red Robin, smirking at the slight skip he heard in his heart beat. It had been a year since they started dating and the smaller boy still had the same reaction that originally caught his notice. But that wasn't why he returned to his side as quickly and quietly as possible.

They had split up when Red noticed online activity in a nearby, supposedly empty, corporate building and SB had heard a mugging in progress a few blocks over. The thieves had been easy to take down and Red didn't seem too concerned when he found the cause of the activity. No, Superboy wasn't in a rush until he heard Red Robin sigh the name Puzzler.

For the last two years he'd listened to Tim rant and rage about the Riddler's tiny assistant. He couldn't seem to get her out of his head since the moment she verbally tore apart his costume as Robin. Sometimes Kon wondered if Tim was just having Bi panic with how often he talked about her.

The problem was, as much as he'd learned from Tim about her, they'd never met.

She was only in Gotham during the summers and never seemed to be working the same cases he did. Puzzler wasn't a vigilante so she didn't follow crime the same way, but he had hoped they would have crossed paths by now. So when Red Robin identified her he booked it over.

Red Robin barely glanced up at his boyfriend before returning to glower at the small girl sitting in the giant office chair. And she was small. Tim said she was their age, a few months younger at most, but looking down at the top of her head he wondered how accurate that was.

He also might be starting to understand why Tim was such a Bi disaster whenever she came up. Puzzler was cute. The pastel pink domino mask matched the overall skirt she wore and Kon tried very hard not to stare at the pale green harnesses on her thighs than matched her sleeveless shirt. He was a little confused why she had a yo-yo attached to one and a bag with cookies on the other, but who knows. Maybe PI assistants got bored and hungry while on the job. To top it off she had plum purple fingerless gloves, elbow and knee pads, combat boots, and question mark buttons. For an assistant she looked every bit ready to kick ass and Kon was beginning to think he'd let her.

"Puzzler," Red Robin said again, rubbing his forehead, exhaustion bleeding into the tone. "Please tell me why you broke into a building just to use a computer. I know you have access to a better one at your father's office."

She grinned at the screen but didn't look up or stop her typing as she answered him. "Because," Kon absently noticed she had the cutest accent,  "Piège Mortel, I needed direct access to this terminal." 

Red groaned under his breath about how it was one of those days. "And what do you need from this terminal?"

Her smile grew and Superboy felt a vague sense of deja vu. "What force and strength cannot get through, I with a gentle touch can do. And many in the street would stand, were I not a friend at hand. What am I?" Ah, that would explain it. That was the look Riddler always had before doling out his riddles.

"A key," Red Robin said after a few minutes of silence. Puzzler nodded but continued tapping away at the keyboard. 

"And what exactly is this key for?"

"Your heart!" 

Superboy couldn't help but snort as he watched adrenaline rush through Tim's body, making his heart beat faster and his cheeks flush. It had the added bonus of making Puzzler's gaze jerk from screen to himself.

Everything froze, from Red Robin blushing, Superboy smirking, and Puzzler looking between the two heroes in front of her. Then Puzzler let out the quietest whine.

"Piège Mortel! You could have warned me your boyfriend was here." She blushed darker than her mask and Kon's lips spread wider. Puzzler whimpered and quickly turned back to the computer to avoid looking at them.

Superboy chuckled and leaned closer to Red Robin as if to whisper in his ear. "I knew she had to be cute with how often you talked about her, but I didn't think she'd be this adorable."

Red Robin stuttered, trying to get out a denial, until he looked back at Puzzler. It was as if her brain had flatlined at the compliment and she couldn't reboot fast enough. It was also the first time he'd seen it happen to her. Usually she was the one being flirty to throw him off, but oh how the tables had turned. Red knew he flustered her occasionally, but never enough to stall her. 

He wondered if it was because of Kon, even if his gut twisted with the idea. His boyfriend was attractive so he wouldn't be too surprised. But she'd reacted to him before. Maybe it was the two of them? Together? That would be very interesting.

Superboy watched as Red Robin schemed and Puzzler finally restarted. She must have forgotten that he had super hearing because she started mumbling under her breath and it was frankly adorable.

"Stop looking. Stop looking. Come on, stop looking at me. Of course they both have to be here. I mean avoiding Superboy could only last so long. Oh Kwami, they are way too hot to be in the same building, let alone dating each other." She whined almost inaudibly again. "Two minutes. I just have to last two minutes and then I can go."

Superboy chuckled and she squeaked. "Oh crap. Superboy, clone of Superman with matching abilities including super hearing. Kwami, how could I forget! Because he's hot and so is Robin and he can still hear me and I need to shut up now." His chuckle grew into a short laugh until he could control it enough to whisper everything she said into Red Robin's ear. Kon felt his own rush of adrenaline as he watched Tim's grin become slightly feral. It was one he wore when he had a plan that usually had a dose of revenge added.

Tim took a step forward and Puzzler tensed but tried to ignore them. This was long overdue if everything Tim told him was true. Kon happily followed a half step behind, content to watch his boyfriend play with the little mouse of a PI. Tim tilted his head to one side of the chair as he went to the other and leaned closer to Puzzler.

"You wouldn't be trying to steal this key would you?" Red Robin said lowly, one hand against the back of the chair, the other on the desk, blocking her in on that side. "If you were, Superboy and I would have to take you in, and we wouldn't want that, would we."

She shuddered and Superboy grinned at the way her heartbeat matched her stutter as she tried to answer. "N-n-no. No stealing. Just, just making a copy." She leaned further away from Red Robin, but bumped against his leg on the other side.

"A copy. Really." He said as he leaned over too. He glanced up at Red Robin to see him smirking at the two of them and Kon felt the need to wipe it off his face. "The thing is, I'm the only one with a key to Red's heart and I haven't heard you ask for it yet." Red's smirk shifted into a frown, but SB continued to watch the small girl between them. "And I doubt you could do that when you've been avoiding me."

"W-w-what! Avoi-avoiding you? Who, who said th-"

"Or is that not the key you're looking for."

She was so flustered and Kon desperately wanted to know what she looked like under the mask. Another glance at Tim told him he felt the same.

A sudden chime from the computer startled them out of the bubble they'd created. Puzzler leaned forward and tapped at the keys quickly. A few seconds later she shut it down and pushed the chair back. The two boys moved with it, but didn't step out of her way.

"Well! That's it. No stealing happening here." She grinned wildly at them and stood up to try and leave. "Now if you boys would excuse me, I'm sure my dad is waiting up on me."

Even standing she was tiny and SB could easily look over her head at Red. Red Robin barely shook his head and Superboy knew he wasn't done playing. So instead of stepping out of the way, he crossed his arms and leaned back.

"I don't know Red. Should we excuse her?" Puzzler gaped at him and then at Red Robin when he spoke.

"Probably not SB. We still don't know what that key is for. It is the middle of the night and we both know it's the best time to steal things." Red leaned in even more to force her closer to Superboy.

"If you keep this up you two will be the ones stealing..." She murmured, moaning in frustration when Superboy chuckled. She turned around and pointed a finger at his chest. "You, you are so lucky you're practically indestructible. I still have half a mind to shove one of those stupidly attractive shoulder spikes in your ear because you keep laughing and it's distracting." This time Red Robin choked on a laugh and she whirled around to him.

"And you! You keep showing up with the hair and now the belts. Seriously, you two need to stop with the belts. I can't think when you're around. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go."

Instead of trying to move either of them she simply jumped over the back of the chair and ran towards the open window at full speed. With his enhanced vision Kon could tell her face was cherry red and he could hear her heart race. He took a step to follow but stopped at the hand on his arm. Tim was blushing, but had a shit eating grin. He just got the best leverage against Puzzler, and he didn't even have to search for it.

The two boys watched as she grabbed her yo-yo and tossed it out the window. They both ran to it as they watched her fall out, only to see her swing away.

Kon listened to the familiar zip of wire for a moment more before turning to his boyfriend.

"So, have we ever talked about a third?" Tim shook his head. "We should talk about a third."

Tim nodded this time. "Agreed."

[sugar-petals]

♡ Levi Dating A Tall Girl

warnings ⚠️  some innuendo, possessiveness, jealousy, skinship

↳ NOTE. short captain ftw 

You don’t fall backwards the first time he hands you a big ass gun to practice target shooting. Finally someone who doesn’t act like a wobbly fool. Long legs. Better shooting stances. No questions asked. Levi likes that.

You can get the emergency supply tea box from the top shelf. He is jealous, this is cheesy, but still. Levi likes that.

You are hard to overlook. For pragmatic reasons since he lives in sheer chaos and needs to collect his squad from the most unholy places, Levi likes that.

But also... he has to confess he finds it fascinating to see you walk and talk. So, Levi likes that.

You can clean the ceiling. For obvious reasons: Levi likes that.

Paintjobs are easy to you. Levi likes that.

You can carry more weapons on you. Knife here, knife there, knives everywhere. Levi likes that.

Without even knowing or trying, you have a natural bold appearance. People don’t start trouble. The squad is peaceful and diligent in your presence. Him, too. He doesn’t say it, but he admits to himself that he feels protected. Levi likes that. A lot.

It might be outdated in the Survey Corps, but Levi enjoys calling you Madam. You really look like one in your Sunday outfit, just so you know. The height difference makes anyone buy into it. So, you go by „Ma’am“ wherever you go, knowing who addressed you that way first because he respects you. Levi likes that.

The advanced Trojan horse: You can smuggle him almost anywhere when you wear a dress. Levi is kinda going crazy with your legs being so up close though. My, my. What an interesting undercover mission. Levi likes that. You, too. Wink wink nudge nudge.

When cooking, you fool around planting your underboob on Levi’s head while the oven does its thing. He’s cursing a bunch of things. But he can’t deny you’re funny and he really fits in that spot, too. Levi likes that.

Your height means more to scrub in the shower. Levi does not shy away from grabbing a sponge for the ladies as we know. Only select people he will foam up personally, so, this is a knighting. If you can shave him, he can shampoo you, it’s tit for tat. A very cleanly exchange. Levi likes that.

In the comfort of your room, not in his, nor his office or elsewhere, really when nobody is watching — Levi sits on your lap. Plenty of space, so. He fits snugly right there. Levi likes that.

You look great when you ride a horse and handle horses well in general. You can get on there in two seconds without delay. Speed is key. Levi likes that.

And I mean.

What’s not to like, anyway? Levi’s captain crush on you equals your height in terms of intensity.

Technically, you, like all other people, qualify as a brat. A tall, noodly brat. But you’re nice to him and vice versa: Don’t deliberately nor accidentally get on his nerves. So the most he’ll do is grumble at you where others would get a speech. If you make a mistake with the equipment, he won’t let it slide for obvious survival-related reasons, but his tone is noticeably gentler, a crucial tinge.

The whole squad — especially the rowdy members who tease him the most ironically — spirals into envy, but doesn’t say anything lest they want Levi’s frown and explanation on how they were messing around while you worked. The guy’s proud of it and wants to deservedly hype your ethic to be honest.

So let us just note that special fondness he has and let it sink in.

Under the guise of “establishing order”, Levi has an excuse to make his schtick for you heard: Indirectly.

Levi scolds anyone calling you bigfoot or titan girl. His supposed reason: They didn’t clean well. In reality, he’s mad they pick on you but he can’t say it.

The captain is concerned that people don’t ruin your day and he’ll do something about it. That’s pretty damn astounding. Levi hardly bothers getting into other people’s mood management and personal things.

Armin thinks it’s adorable when Levi casually walks between you and Hanji, likely headed somewhere to buy conveniences because Sasha is dying to get food. Connie calls it the ‘Levi Sammich’ and laughs his ass off every. Single. Time.

Mad titan scientist she is, Hanji’s latest experiment involves a two-person battle maneuver where you have to carry Levi piggyback. He initially declines, but it looks adorable indeed, actually. You don’t really have to put efforts into holding him in place awkwardly, his legs are strong. So much about two-person maneuvers, the two of you fight well as a duo, your bodies complement each other. Best believe the same feat applies to what happens between four bedposts.

In more casual settings, he dons his usual scowl when he stands next to you, but he thinks it's sexy that you look at his shoulders from above. You can see the weight on them.

He wishes he had your shoulders. But then again, he wouldn’t want to change bodies at the end of the day, as surprising as it sounds. Levi knows he needs to be a compact little unit to do what he does.

A lot of people taunt you as a couple, but after some time of always reacting with anger right away, he becomes cooler about his self-worth. Levi realizes — man, he knows who he is.

Should you ever faint, he can catch you with ease. Levi Ackerman is the last guy to get crushed by his gf, that we all know. He’s not afraid of your body or your weight. No cowardice, no shame, no questions asked.

And as we know. He got a thing with your legs, don’t even try. Legs legs legs leggy legs, that’s all there is on Levi’s brain when you don’t wear a uniform but skirts during leisure time. He tries to block out that thought, unsuccessfully.

Titans he can go without, but you are his irreplaceable sexy goddess you know. Levi admires you.

Whenever you hit your hip or limbs at an awkwardly set-up table, Levi will position it elsewhere immediately. Low door frames he can’t do anything against, but he will tug at your sleeve twice every time you enter a room while walking behind you so you remember to stay alert. It’s... really cute how he’s tugging at you from below. I need a moment.

In the mornings, an even cuter thing happens: When his legs are too short to reach the ground while he’s sitting on an improvised barber chair of yours. You’re cutting his neck hair while he’s pouty about his tininess. You do your best to organize a smaller chair with Armin’s help later on.

But your height difference also causes some upheaval at the start or the relationship and brings up some deeper wounds.

You can easily help tie Eren’s man bun way up there and that makes Levi extra jealous. In fact, he feels like imploding to the point of creating a black hole. Even Mikasa is fine with it because it’s all on a friendly basis with no thought behind it. Like it’s just helping Eren get his hair under control for squad practice. But Levi sees red:

Out of sheer Ackerspite, he will grow out the top part of his undercut and ask you to tie up his hair, too. This guy is on fire. Like hello, he wants your hands in his hair like that as well!

He orders Mikasa to take care of Eren’s “brat mop on his head” every morning “for the sake of the cleanly survey corps dress code” without exception. Eren is totally confused, Mikasa likes the idea, and you are shocked.

Damn, this guy doesn’t play.

He wants you to stroke and tie only his sacred hair if he’s entirely honest with himself. Best time of the day for him. Levi ends up looking like your smol samurai bodyguard with his new hairstyle. You could fancy that in the long run.

And... you know he is insecure. You always know. And, if you’re honest yourself, are glad to have permission to give him such deliberate affection because he values it so much.

Levi hardly builds any romantic bonds and if he does, he easily feels left out because the truth is, he’s needier than the average person. It’s difficult if there are only few people close enough for that, since Levi needs a lot.

Eren is no viable competition, but you decide you gotta make that clear to the touch-starved little guy. Since... In reality, the man bun discussion is not about Levi being petty just because. It’s about wanting to have that connection with you. And: Your attention. Levi doesn’t look like it, but he needs it. A metric ton.

In fact, Levi is the biggest love-deprived attention whore on the entire island and that’s a hard fact.

So, what to do about it. First: Clean slate needed, because you’re a bit annoyed, too.

You sit down for dinner and talk to Levi about how you are not interested in stealing Eren from Mikasa, nor do you think Levi looks ugly or invisible compared to Eren because of the height. You want to be a helpful squad member and he has no business imposing his brat hair rules to make himself exclusive out of fear, as if you would jump Eren as soon as he doesn’t look. And that he should say when he’s envious or wants something, point-blank. You’re very willing to give him all the attention to the moon and back alright.

Levi, grumpy at himself, apologizes for wanting to control the situation instead of saying that he wishes for time with you and makes tea.

He’s feeling mighty called out but owns up to all of this having been a knee-jerk response. Guy’s hard on himself, but that’s how he adapts his behavior.

The whole truth is, he knows that Eren is a lot easier to be around while he, Levi, is a complicated guy that is arguably hard to approach in random matters, even for loved ones.

He beats himself up for that and wants to be more emotionally and physically accessible to you so you can shower your affections on him the way you want to. That’s what it really boils down to.

That means fishing for old parts of his youth he didn’t allow. Levi wants to challenge himself to be more open to receiving. He knows he keeps his appeal on lock and it’s time to change that because he sees that you enjoy such closeness. Just the way he does, but secretly.

He also says to you that you can always touch him the way you desire after work.

Levi sees how you like being hands-on and how you do it, and makes it firm that you don’t have to walk on eggshells, hold back, or ask like it’s a delicate matter.

Levi sees relationships in simple terms: Since you’re together, of course you can touch him. It’s part of the whole thing by default to him and he even assumed you took it for granted like there’s telepathy going on.

In fact, brace yourself: For the lack of a better word, it’s even his expectation that this happens. Not like an obligation but as in, that you take opportunities is a given to him, he anticipates it.

You reply that it’s good he communicates this, it’s got to be outspoken. His views on how this whole thing goes has to be out in the open. It gives you a lot more clarity on his boundaries, too.

Before another bout of jealousy unearths more taken-for-granted things, Levi realizes he has to make up his mind that he has to talk about his limits.

So, he also says he entrusts it to you to find the very right moments for skinship.

That entails kissing and pinning and sitting close to another. And sex. Which is pretty damn enjoyable with him, the real fucking deal. So steamy. My God.

And he makes it clear he does his paperwork fast and you can always ask, he’s never too busy to postpone things entirely. He’d rather die the next day after winding in the sheets than handling paper. Levi can’t sleep anyways so it gets his mind off. It’s always welcome and he tells you not to be hesitant.

Levi is the type to absolutely pick up the cues right away — and proceed to really make out against a wall really intensely — so you’re under no obligation to wave a giant red cloth in front of him like he’s a Spanish bull or whatever. He gets the hints and goes along. Not to worry.

You also ask Levi what he thinks about you initiating romantic things and he shrugs — „Do what you want.“

The brand of romance Levi is out for you can already guess anyways. Tea and more tea.

For now, that’s where you agree to “leave it at that” after he thanks you for being straightforward.

You launch your first affections before bedtime. He lets you sleep in his bed, damn right. You really have to be a priority to be able to reside there, I’m telling you. Levi rests with one eye open and in his harness, you have all the blanket for yourself to cuddle up in. That won’t stop you from peppering his face with a few very deliberately placed smooches.

Levi can’t deny he’s a sucker for getting forehead kisses. He drops his hygiene protocol just for that. Safe to say his man bun jealousy from earlier that day cools off in no time. Not to say it shatters completely when you go for the gold that is his pretty little mouth. He’s so overwhelmed emotionally, he almost cries. Levi never thought someone would do this with him.

You repeat the same thing next day, behind the barracks after sunset. Levi holds you real tight. He’s so addictive in the best way. Going by how breathless it all winds up to be, he doesn’t want the kisses to end.

What your height is handy for here? He can gaze up to the night sky when he locks lips with you. Levi, as we know, likes seeing the moon and training his neck flexibility anyways. But that’s not the purpose behind why he’s so down to kiss you so passionately, rest assured.

If he tiptoes a little, he can park his pretty face under your chin after you both ran out of air. Levi’s drug... your long neck. He thinks it smells so good.

He murmurs in response, but he actually wants to be gently cooed at and petted when he rests there. Just a little. He’s humming. Ah, so satisfying. Guess you aced the „Do what you want“ part. You’ll do this with him Lord knows for how many times.

Levi cuddles up at your chest later. Plenty of space for him, and he loves how your voice resounds from there.

Oh— by the way. Since Hanji installed one between the two apple trees outside: It’s always nice to sleep in a hammock with a tall girl. The fabric doesn’t fold him in, he can watch the stars with you off duty. You give him a reason to be content, and that’s the sweetest thing. Levi’s all in love, he’s really grateful. You go, Ma’am.

— more levi writings: sub!levi hc | levi’s happy end/tea shop hc

[alittlewhump]

Unbidden - Act 2, chapter 8

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Content warnings: None

Morgan followed the sound of voices through the archives. He'd taken a more familiar route this time, one that skirted closer to the markets than he'd liked. Blaise and Cain were discussing something, but Cain stopped mid-sentence when he spied Morgan.

"Morgan! It's good to see you again, friend, though I had not expected you so soon." Morgan allowed himself a small smile. He'd missed Cain and his stories, his easy friendliness.

Blaise spun around to face him. "What are you doing here? You-" She seemed to lose her train of thought briefly as her eyes lingered at the collar of his shirt. "You should be resting."

"I want to make up for the time I've lost," Morgan said, growing serious again. He didn't feel tired, exactly, and anyway there was no respite to be found in his shared room. "There are demons seeking the tomb of Tal Rasha as well. Time is of the essence. What is it you've found?"

He couldn't read Blaise's expression as he came around the table to look at the books laid out across it. It turned out that finding the tomb would only be half the problem. There was a specific artifact needed to open it, and it had been split into pieces. A staff, which Morgan recognized from a tour of the local museum, and an amulet, which Blaise had already managed to recover from the demons who had held it. But it was not as simple as just having the pieces; there was a strange device required to bind them together, and that was guarded in yet another tomb by magical traps set by an ancient order of mages known as the Horadrim. Cain was familiar with this order, luckily enough, and was certain that he would be able to use the device once they'd located it, and it looked like Blaise had already eliminated several options from a long list of possible locations for that tomb.

It was growing late in the day, though, and Blaise flatly refused to start a new expedition before the morning. "You might be fine," she groused, not sounding as though she believed that to be the case at all, "but I'm hungry and tired. I'm going back to the palace. You can come with me, if you want. You could probably use the rest."

Morgan didn't want to go back, not yet. He looked down at the map on the table in front of him. Most of the marked locations were far enough from the city to be troublesome, but within a reasonable distance of a waypoint. Potentially good ways to keep himself occupied, to make sure his skills hadn't suffered too badly from disuse. Unfortunately, he'd never accessed most of the waypoints. He would need help with that.

"I'll stay here for the night. I can catch up on research." He paused. Perhaps someone else could act as a guide, someone he wasn't already deeply indebted to. "Is there someone who could show me to these waypoints?"

"Yeah. Me. Tomorrow." No luck there, then. Blaise put one hand on her hip. "Are you really sure you want to stay here?"

"Yes." He'd fled his room for a reason. If he didn't have something useful to focus his attention on now, he was going to come apart at the seams. He just needed to occupy himself, and that was going to be much easier here.

"All right, fine. But I'm not going to take you anywhere tomorrow if you haven't gotten any rest."

Anger flared suddenly hot in Morgan's chest. She kept insisting he rest, as though he hadn't just lost - how much time exactly wasn't clear, but it was certainly at least a few days of precious time, while she apparently picked up the slack. Did she still think of him as a child, someone who needed to be taken care of? Just another responsibility to shoulder? He slammed his open hand down on the table, growling "I don't want-"

He caught himself there, squeezed his eyes shut. Took a deep breath. Control. She had every reason to see him as an inconvenience, and that wasn't important. How others perceived him was inconsequential, he reminded himself. The only thing that really mattered was the Balance. His most important task was to find and stop the demons intent on upsetting it, and he wasn't going to get any closer to that goal by antagonizing a person who could help him. What he needed was her cooperation, not her respect.

"I apologize for that outburst," he said, opening his eyes but keeping them deferentially cast down. "It was not called for. I have had my fill of sitting idle, but I will rest when I need to."

Blaise was silent for a moment. "That's... whatever. Fine. See you tomorrow." She left without further comment. Morgan smoothed down the paper he'd rumpled in his childish show of temper. Not counting the claw vipers, it had been a long while since the last time he'd let himself get agitated to the point of lashing out. He was still on edge, not feeling quite settled in his skin after all that had happened. How long was it going to take him to get back to normal? He would have to focus his meditation on regaining emotional control for a while. This type of behaviour was totally unacceptable.

Cain cleared his throat. "Shall we continue? I believe I have at least another half hour in me today." He smiled warmly and Morgan relaxed a little. He could count on the scholar to leave well enough alone, to focus on the task at hand as he so badly needed to do.

"Yes, please."

Cain dedicated the better part of the next hour to filling in details about the Horadrim and their role in imprisoning Baal. He had managed to put together a diagram of the runes he suspected would be holding the demon lord in place, which Morgan set aside carefully to memorize later. He also had a general idea of the area where the Horadric cube, the device required to reunite the staff, was located, and what manner of traps would be securing it. The trouble was that the desert landscape had shifted over the intervening years, so none of the nearby landmarks were there any more. It was in this general area that Blaise had been concentrating her efforts, having gotten clearance from her superiors to pursue the lead. She had made impressive progress. Hopefully she would still be willing to work with Morgan after he'd repaid her efforts with nothing but a short temper. She didn't tend to accept apologies well, though. He'd just have to work harder at making himself useful.

After Cain retired for the evening, Morgan settled into what felt like a reasonable pattern of alternating between study and meditation. He had to ease himself into it at first; the urge to focus all of his energy on the problem of finding the cube was very strong. But the longer he studied, the more he realized he did need to rest himself properly. Once he passed the initial hurdle of forcing himself to stop and meditate, it was actually a relief to do so. It was good to meditate with peaceful intent again. The familiar, uninterrupted mental exercises were calming in a way he'd sorely missed, and it felt like a luxury to be able to sit in a comfortable chair again. Of course, everything felt like a luxury, compared to... well. It was nice to have a fresh appreciation for the small things.

By the time the sun was coming up, Morgan was satisfied that his understanding was at least adequate. Blaise and Cain found him leaning over the table comparing two maps, trying to pick out notable landmarks from the older one that might still be recognizable in some way.

"Good morning," he greeted them, looking up from his comparison a few seconds later. Both appeared to be in reasonably good spirits.

"Morning. So, do you still want to go out today, or do you want to keep studying?" Blaise lingered at the threshold while Cain made his way around the large table.

"I'd like to join the search today. I've rested," Morgan added quickly at the expression that flickered across her face. "More than I expected. I can keep up."

"Right. Get your gear and some breakfast then, we should go before it gets too much hotter."

Morgan flinched as a hand came down on his own. He'd almost forgotten Cain's tendency towards this sort of casual contact. The old man patted his hand twice, smiling encouragingly.

"Do stay safe out there. Good luck."

"Thank you," Morgan said, sliding his hand away. "I'll meet you at the waypoint," he suggested as he headed past Blaise. She didn't agree or refuse, instead following him out of the archives wordlessly. She only broke her silence once they were outside.

"You know you don't have to do this," she said, uncharacteristically quiet. Morgan searched her face, but couldn't identify the expression on it.

"No, I do. I can't just stand by and do nothing as evil gathers its forces. As a follower of-" he caught himself, remembering they were out in public. "I am obligated to do everything in my power to ensure that Darkness does not triumph over the Light," he explained instead.

"After all you - I mean, don't you think you've done enough by now?" Her unreadable expression didn't budge. At least it wasn't anger, he decided. That was a positive.

"No. There is no 'enough' until the Balance is righted. And even then, there will always be more to do." It wasn't a single task to be completed, it was a duty that extended past the definition of 'lifelong' as most people knew it. Long after his body was dust, even long after his spirit faded, there would still be more to do. It just wouldn't be his to do any more. But since there was still life in him in this world, he had to keep working toward the larger goal.

Blaise seemed unsatisfied with his response, but they had reached the waypoint. "Well, I guess I'll scout ahead while you get yourself together. If I'm not here when you get back, just wait for me."

"Very well." He turned to head towards the palace. If he was fast enough, he could get equipped and still visit the marketplace before it got too busy. There was a vendor who sold nuts and cheeses, good nutrient-dense foods that would be suitable for eating while travelling. It would save time if he could avoid larger meals altogether.

Morgan was relieved to find his room empty when he reached it. It wasn't that he didn't want to see Jemali, exactly, but he wasn't looking forward to it either. Not before he managed to get a handle on his emotions. To dismiss the lingering ache of disappointment that he'd invited in by allowing himself to believe briefly, stupidly, that the kindness he'd received had been anything other than a transaction. Of course he knew better, but it had been a moment of weakness. Nothing to do for it but try to get stronger.

His equipment was still as he'd left it. Despite not wanting to keep Blaise waiting longer than necessary, he let himself fall into an easy rhythm of tightening and checking buckles, running his fingers along the edges of the straps to find any thinning or splitting spots. It was a pleasantly tactile exercise, and the familiarity was a comfort.

The small bag of trinkets had been placed back with the others. It was tempting to go through them, to satisfy his vague curiosity about the cost of Jemali's service, but he'd already spent more time than he intended here. It was time to move on to the marketplace, then the desert. Yes, it was good to have an itinerary again.

[kagomiko]

real name : higurashi kagome  /  日暮ひぐらし かごめ . single or taken : timeline dependent , single  /  married . abilities or powers : her most noteworthy ability is her immense spiritual power , which she inherited from kikyo . kagome can also perform spiritual energy projection , which has said spiritual energy concentrated in the palms of her hand & ultimately released for offensive purposes . kagome is also capable of spiritual reflection , wherein her opponents spiritual energy is thrown back at them . another key skill is kagome’s innate spiritual awareness , which allows her to perceive or sense unwordly things such as ghosts , spirits or demonic auras . illusion & demonic immunity is another natural ability ; she upholds it effortlessly due to her aforementioned immense spiritual power , in addition to her usually being free of negative emotions . purification is one of her more developed skills ; kagome is able to purify malevolent forces , such as demonic energy or miasma . she does this by releasing pure spiritual energy , which she constantly releases unconsciously , however its far more powerful when concentrated through tools like her arrows . infamously known for her miraculous ability to time travel , kagome is able to travel between modern day & feudal japan . additionally , she is immune to any time-stopping spells , as she has a flow of time unique to her . last but not least , archery . kagome’s extensive travels throughout a warrning country helped shaped her into a fair marksman & archer . eye colour : brown . hair colour : black . family members : mother anka higurashi , younger brother sota higurashi , grandfather , husband inuyasha , daughter moroha , brother-in-law sesshomaru , sister-in-law moe , nieces setsuna  /  towa  /  mei . pets : her family cats name is buyo . she’s a female calico . the name buyo seems to be from the japanese onomatopoeia of a squishing noise which can also mean flabby or squishy .

something they don’t like : injustice , discrimination , rainy days , artificial flowers , white feminism , math , hypocritical behaviour , breaking in shoes , bad hygiene . hobbies/activities : writing ❪ in her journal most actively , but also poetry , short stories & novels ❫ , calligraphy , ikebana , herbalism , cooking , skating , bicycling , archery , swimming , & embroidery  /  sewing  /  knitting  /  stitching  . ever hurt anyone before : by nature , kagome is a kindhearted , compassionate & benevolent individual . that said , she does have a strong sense of justice & never hesitates to rise against those oppose her beliefs . she chooses her battles , but fights hard , especially when she’s fighting someone whose hurt her friends or family . prior to falling in love with inuyasha , she had little to no genuine moments of selfishness or greed . it wasn’t until she wanted him so strongly that we begin to see more relatable behaviour from kagome , especially in regards to her complicated relationship with kikyo . additionally , one could argue that her repeated indifference has hurt hojo on more than one occasion . animal that represents them : butterly . the butterfly is one of the most emblematic totem animals , symbolizing powerful  /  personal transformation , metamorphosis in your life , renewal  /  rebirth , lightness of being , playfulness , elevation from earthly matters , tuning into emotional or spiritual energy , & the world of the soul . worst habits : overworking , not getting enough sleep , having a huge to-do list , daydreaming , extensive inner-monologues , & exclusively in regards to her respective relationships with inuyasha & sota , losing her temper .

role models : first & foremost , her mother . they’ve always had a very healthy , respectful & loving relationship . when kagome’s father died , her mother was still pregnant with sota . being thrust into a such harsh reality was horrific for all those involved , but nevertheless , her mother , anka , continuously put her best foot forward & solidified herself with breathtaking resolve . kagome saw firsthand how her mother held things together for their family , built a new life for them , & continued to be a beacon of unconditional love & support throughout the entirety of her life . another significant role model for kagome is aung san suu kyi , who campaigned for democracy in burma . she became the first state counsellor of myanmar & was awarded a nobel peace prize for her non-violent struggels for democracy & human rights . kagome also admires audrey hepburn , a beloved actress who is revered not only for her acting skills but also her philanthropic work as a unicef ambassador . she led a life devoted to kindness & compassion while being a phenomenal mother , wife & humanitarian . sexual orientation : undetermined , potentially pansexual . thoughts on marriage/kids : kagome has always been a lover of love . growing up she never particularly ached or yearned for a significant other , nor does she feel the need to define herself by her romantic affairs , but she still finds love in all of its forms to be a beautiful , magical thing . she has no opposition for marriage , but carries a multitude of ambitions for her future & never held marriage as a significant priority when picturing her life . on the subject of children , kagome adores them ! she has very strong , innate maternal instincts , & can definitely finds a sense of fulfillment in nurturing the spiritual growth of children . she does want to be a mother , but it is one of many wishes for her future , & again , not a main priority . to be happy , healthy & able to give  /  receive love is what she thinks is most important .

style preferences : kagome has long since held a considerably girly fashion sense , while regularly teetering between a modest & more playful style . her wardrobe primarily consists of dresses & skirts . kagome has a particular fascination for snug sweaters & bulky cardigans that envelop her whole . she loves all colours but typically wears pastels , pinks & blues in her day-to-day . she also often wears wedge heels , moccasins or loafers . approach to friendships : notwithstanding her personal experiences with bullying when she was younger , kagome maintained a levelheaded demeanour in life , with school being no exception . she treats all with fairness & respect . kagome will normally stay to her usual group of friends , but will never hesitate to branch out to someone , should the situation call for it .even if she doesn't say a word , her feelings are known to be easy to read due to her honest expressions , which generally cause those around her to soften in tough situations & consequently be honest in return .

thoughts on pie : loves pie , especially homemade . can bake it herself but prefers her mothers . favourite drink : ice water & green tea ❪ jasmine , sencha , matcha , genmaicha & hojicha are a few favourites ❫ . favourite place to spend time at : kagome is a firm believer of the  ❛  it’s not about the place , it’s about the company  ❜  way of seeing things . however , she does have a fondness for the sacred tree  /  the forest of inuyasha . also, while she doesn’t actually go back to visit , she does have a special place in her heart for her old family home from before they moved to the shrine , as she has many memories of time there with her father .

swim in the lake or in the ocean : the ocean . their type : kagome has never found herself drawn to a particular type , at least not in regards to appearances . what is essential to her in a significant other , is a good heart . it’s not required that she agrees with them on every matter , but she needs to be able to accept & respect their point of view . if she can’t , if their heart  /  beliefs  /  values oppose her defined sense of justice in any way , she won’t overlook it . while that is most important , she may also be interested in adventurers ; people with great ambition & drive , people who are wanting to better themselves &  /  or better the world . camping or indoors : so , whilst traversing between modern day & sengoku jidai , she did unearth a newfound love & appreciation for the beauty of nature . however , as she often spent extensive periods of time outdoors , it also made her appreciate the everyday indulgences one can access through means such as indoor plumbing , electricity , hot water , etc . of course as said before , so long as the company is good , she will make the most of whatever situation she’s in , but in this instance she sees the value in either choice . everything in moderation , really .

𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗯𝘆 : @7theaven​ ! thank u sm sweetheart i loved this . 𝘁𝗮𝗴𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗴 : @senpujin​ , @slaheir​ , @devilreno​ , @ofmsfortune​ , @warriorhe​ , @balynce​ , @ymagishi​ , @bkugs​ , @innosen​ , @drakenskies​ , @tofiorire​ , @crimsonacrosstime​ , @puppet-slayer​ , @daikusedai​ , @conflictedhanyou​ & whoever else is interested !

[nautiscarader]

Anonymous 1 hours ago

Dipper And Wendy visit the H-hotel and make a new friend https://mobile.twitter.com/JonesBO50034805/status/1273656307170652160/photo/1

(Ao3)

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Anonymous 1 hours ago

Dipper And Wendy visit the H-hotel and make a new friend https://mobile.twitter.com/JonesBO50034805/status/1273656307170652160/photo/1

- I've always knew that wandering into random rooms will end like this...

Velma Dinkley couldn't really complain though. She's spent a significant portion of her life running from door to door, all looking the same, and in a hotel with infinite number of them, one really could make an easy mistake. And now, trapped between two naked bodies of complete strangers, she was feeling more and more ecstatic every moment.

From their moans and very brief introduction, she learned that the young man she was sucking off was called Dipper, much like the constellation, and his red-headed girlfriend, who watched her actions, was named Wendy. And though at first she was merely an observer, she quickly wanted to join the fun, and her lips quickly met hers at the base of Dipper's cock.

Her hands, however, were nothing but idle, reaching underneath Velma's sweater and trying to undo her bra.

- Oh wow, going commando? - Wendy smiled, seeing a blush on her new friend's face - It's always the nerdy ones...

Velma muffled, with Dipper's cock in her mouth, trying to explain herself, but her speech was quickly interrupted when Wendy unceremoniously pulled her head back, depraving Dipper of her lips, to which he reacted with a sharp yelp.

- Sorry for the interruption, Dip - Wendy calmed him down - But feast your eyes on these!

And with a single pull she disrobed Velma of her sweater, revealing a rather large pair of breasts. Wendy's quick move hid Velma's blush for a while, but as her two lovers marvelled at her assets, it quickly came back tenfold.

- Jinkies! - Is that how you call them? - Wendy chuckled.- I bet you can teach me a thing or two...

Wendy leaned forward, dragging her finger between Velma's tits.

- Like, what? - she corrected her slightly skewed glasses

Wendy and Dipper exchanged confused looks.

- Oh come on, don't tell me you;ve never done that!

And with equal nonchalance, she pressed Velma's body against Dipper's, forcing his cock to slide between her voluptuous breasts.

- O-Oh, that... - Yeah, "that", Wendy added. - Come on, girl, start working out!

And with a gentle pat to her head, Velma looked up at the face of her lover, a man she hasn't seen in her life until ten minutes ago, and with a sly smile drawing on her face, she pressed her hands against her breasts to make the very first move. Dipper's eyes rolled up and he let out a soft, almost girly moan, which turned into a proper one when Velma's lips touched his tip with her lips. Velma thought she should feel at the very least strange, sucking a random man's cock, with his girlfriend watching and caressing his abdomen, but the strange, strange hotel she ended up in seemed to have eradicated the feeling of shame. She licked his tip, gathering first small droplets of pre-cum, undoubtedly caused but the presence of not one, but two redheads. Something told her her lover had a thing for that shade...

With each lick, Velma took Dipper an inch or so deeper into her mouth, while her breasts made sure that the rest of his cock was covered with heavenly soft skin, much like her warm, welcoming mouth. Wendy, on the other hand, took care of his testicles, massaging them, as much as he could with Velma's massive bosom in front of her. But that allowed her to sneak a few kisses not only to her boyfriend's cock, but also Velma's breasts, much to her surprise and excitement.

She let out a gasp when the other hand of the red-head found its way between Velma's legs and discovered that bra wasn't the only part of her attire that was missing. her finger slipped between her thick folds, forcing more moans to vibrate around Dipper's cock, only strengthening the moans coming from his lips.

- He's not gonna last much longer. - Wendy spoke - Yeah, I-I can tell tha-hey!

Velma protested when Wendy took her place, slobbering all over the cock that until recently made contact with mostly Velma's breasts. Velma watched as Wendy bobbed her head furiously up and down, making Dipper's legs twitch and writhe.

- Well, guess you could teach me a thing or two as well...

Wendy stopped and looked at her new friend and let go of her boyfriend's cock.

- Wanna try? It's really easy. - If you say so-

But Velma didn't have time to deliberate, as Wendy's hand grabbed her short hair and pressed her against Dipper's crotch, filling her mouth with him in an instant. The same aggressive after-taste and slight masculine smell now overwhelmed her senses, and the fact that Wendy wasn't letting her go, made her slightly dizzy...

When Wendy pulled her back, Velma only let out a soft "Jinkies!", that allowed her to take a breath, before Wendy impaled her on her boyfriend's cock again and again. Somewhere around her, she could hear Dipper's cries and moans, as well as soft kisses Wendy was planting around his abdomen. And with each minute of her impromptu "lesson", she could feel her lover's climax coming faster and faster.

- We-Velma!

Dipper cried and watched as Velma's eyes bulge out when first stream of thick cum floods her mouth. If she wasn't already feeling light-headed, then the new explosion of taste and smell has done it, sending her into  erotic stupor that made her suck more of his fluids...

But they weren't hers for long, as Wendy pulled her back  once more, this time to take what was rightfully hers. Velma was depraved of oxygen for the fifth or sixth time when Wendy pressed her lips against her, her tongue swirling around the dollop of thick cum in her mouth. But Velma wouldn't give up that easily, and soon the two redheads fought for Dipper's seed, until each received her share and could break their impromptu kiss.

- Oh... oh jinkiest of jinkies... - Velma groaned, swallowing last droplets of heavy load - I...I didn't expect that to happen to me... - Well, we're glad we could have helped you. What do you say, Dip?

But Dipper could pant, watching his girlfriend exchanged sloppy, cum-filled kiss with the stranger that just sucked him off.

- Hm, maybe he needs some encouragement to open his mouth.

Once more, Wendy took the initiative and closed her arms around Velma's body, only to effortlessly lift her legs into the air, exposing her glistening pussy hidden underneath her red skirt. And when Dipper saw it, he gladly leapt forward, having not one, but two of them to choose from. Wendy and Velma soon met face-to-face, as their pussies were pressed against each other, giving Dipper better access to both of them at the same time.

- Is-Is that how you spend every night with... er, what-what was the name of your friend? - Velma stuttered by sudden intrusion of Dipper's tongue between her folds - Ta-Tambry - Wendy wheezed, as Dipper dug his fingers into her sex - I wou-wouldn't wo-worry about her, though... We-We-ve been separated before...

And with that, their lips met again, just as Dipper continued to repay them for the mind-blowing blowjob he received.

===============

- So, you're also chasing ghosts? - Tambry gently rolled to her side, passing the joint to on of her new lovers. - Like, yeah! I mean we mostly run away that chase, and they usually end up not being ghosts. - Shaggy replied. - Ours usually are. Or are worse. Monsters, demons, that kind of stuff. - Jeepers! - Daphne exclaimed relaxing on top of Tambry's bosom, her usually perfect hair looking equally untidy as Shaggy's. - Your friends must be brave. - Yeah, they are.. - Tambry moaned, pressing her head against her breasts - Maybe we can go on some joined expedition one day...

Tambry let out a deep moan, as she drifted off to a well-deserved slumber, knowing Wendy and Dipper were in good hands.

[mollymauk-teafleak]

The Man That Came Back

Thanks so much to @minky-for-short and @spiky-lesbian, my wonderful betas

Please consider leaving a comment on Ao3, it’s free, easy and means so much! 

---

For the next part of their plan, a heist needs to be pulled off in the fanciest bar on Saturn. And Buddy knows exactly how Juno can disguise himself, much to the delight of Nureyev

---

“Captain, all due respect and everything but that’s got to be the most ridiculous idea I ever heard.”

Buddy gave him a more than slightly exhausted look over the building plans she was studying on her comms screen, “You know, darling, it would be incredibly helpful if that wasn’t your response to every single plan I put in front of you…”

Juno gave her one of his scowls, the ones where he pouted a little and scrunched up his face, where he knew he was being unreasonable but was going to be stubborn all the same, “Well, let’s just say this one tops the whole damn lot! I don’t even...how...how do you even imagine I’d be any good at this?”

Buddy seemed to be tuning him out for the most part, eyes returning to her screen as the floorplan of the bar rotated slowly, exactly where their marks would enter, meet and most likely leave plotted out in glowing lines, “From the data I gathered on you, same way I know not to send you to any job that may, for some unknown reason, take place in a seafood restaurant owing to your allergy to shellfish. I like to know my crew, young lady, their likes, dislikes, the skills they boast about...and the skills they don’t. Keeps things smooth, interesting and us alive.”

Juno had very little reply to that, still choking on the embarrassment he was hiding behind annoyance, “But...what kind of database has that on file?”

“No database that I’ve ever heard of, darling, but you are aware that your high school yearbooks are also digitised and on file, easily accessible in the archives if one has no more information than your name?”

Juno stalled at that, turning somehow redder, “And that was relevant when hiring me to be a space pirate, was it?”

“As far as I’m concerned,” Buddy raised an eyebrow, tracing a new glowing line onto the screen with her finger, “When I am inviting someone new into my family, everything is relevant. Would you pick a sibling or cousin so carelessly, if you had the chance to do so?”

“But…” Juno screwed up his face even tighter, clearly recognising he was trapped in an unwinnable argument but unwilling to go down without a pointless fight, “Of all the jobs, why did it have to be this?”

With a flick of devastatingly manicured fingers, Buddy blew up the plan into a hologram between them and spoke as if to a small child, “The view offered by that position is unparalleled, you’ll be able to see every table as well as the entrances to the bathrooms and the kitchens, thereby covering every possible means of escape for our mark and you can provide a fitting distraction at a moment’s notice.”

“Yeah, yeah, I read the plans before I came in here,” Juno waved away her hands patiently pointing to what she was referencing on the miniature, translucent version of the Saturnian wine bar, The Albedo, “I get your point, doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

“I grant you that,” Buddy allowed, “Look, Juno, I’m not asking for talent worthy of a Saturday night stream, you just have to be functional. Enough that we can pull off what should be this very simple and problem free job. Put away that scowl of yours and have fun with it, if you can.”

Juno groaned irritatedly and stared at the still revolving plan in front of him. A simple job. Place themselves within the bar, watch the exchange of the stolen goods between their marks then wait until they leave and re-steal it right from out their back pocket. Boom, details on where the last piece of their little puzzle was hiding, where the book was. Snatch it up before anyone else could find it and not have to pay the exorbitant price their mark probably did. Don’t rob the shadowy, organised crime seller of the information who had security coming out of their ears, rob the poor idiot who bought the thing.

Easy. But it sure as hell didn’t have to be fun.

“Just do me a favour,” he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, “Please put minimal crew members in earshot. And for the love of all that’s holy, not Vesper.”

“Brown butter old fashioned please. With a cherry, if you have one to hand.”

A good alias was like stepping into a different skin, Nureyev had always been taught. Everything you were became less than a memory and this new personality took over completely. If you didn’t believe it, then your mark never would. It had to be complete. It had to be total. You essentially needed to die, for as long as required.

Nureyev still held true to that belief. But sometimes, on a job as easy as this one, he didn’t think it beyond the realm of possibility that your new identity may just happen to have the same favourite drink as you did.

He leaned against the bar and waited for his drink, allowing his eyes a pass over the scene. The bar was comfortably full without being a press of warm bodies in evening wear, just a generous handful of couples and groups at tables or standing with him at the bar, showing why Saturn was considered to have the most eccentric style of the solar planets. The headdresses were towering, the frills were voluminuous, the skirts were miles in diameter. Nureyev was starting to feel a little overshadowed in his simple black suit with gold embellishments set into the silk. The drinks poured out billows of dry ice and came in every colour on the spectrum apart from the usual ones. The music was the only thing old school, classic, a simple piano played by a very talented individual on a small, circular centre platform. Nureyev smiled, it was funny how some things kept coming back into fashion. How old could seem new if it was just old enough.

And in amongst the noise, familiarity. Rita, dressed as a waitress, moving between the tables, chatting animatedly with everyone she brought drinks to so her rounds took about ten times longer than she needed to. Hopefully that slight, almost unnoticeable lump in the pocket of her trousers was the signal jammer, just in case their mark tried to call him some kind of backup or there was a tracker on the goods. Rita didn’t often come down on jobs like this, her place was usually back on the ship, but she’d been desperate to see the bar itself (it had apparently been the setting for one of the streams she liked so much) and besides, if the signal changed, the jammer would need to hunt it down to take it out and Rita was the only one Buddy trusted with that task.

Jet was posing as a patron, dressed in smart dark clothes with his hair pulled back rather neatly, looking like he was struggling with the drink that had been set down in front of him. Nureyev couldn’t blame him, the thing had glowing orbs in it that looked like alien eggs. Not that he’d be drinking much of it anyway, in his usual roll as the muscle, just in case things went south. Jet was always a strong, comforting presence when they went to task and Nureyev was really starting to appreciate it. Muscles were certainly something he’d lacked, if he could be said to lack anything aside humility. Speed and cunning he had but his wiry frame had earned him more than a few bruised ribs in the past when jobs had turned irritatingly sour and fists had come out. He’d learned how to avoid those sorts of outcomes fast.

Nureyev’s eyes continued along, taking in the electric blue lighting fixtures making them look like they were all underwater, sleek leather furnishings, glinting gold and jewels on necks and fingers and wrists. His fingers got that old itch in them but he stilled himself. After the prize was taken, perhaps, but certainly not a minute before.

But one thing unsettled him deeply about the whole situation. The one face he hadn’t seen. The one face he would know no matter what disguise or mask it wore, the one face he always looked for first. Juno Steel was nowhere his eyes could see.

Nureyev frowned. He knew Juno was supposed to be posing as an employee of the bar itself, Rita had worked hard forging them employment orders from the owners. He’d expected to see him behind the bar serving drinks and had gotten himself a little excited about flirting with him shamelessly. They’d had some fun experiences with that, playing around with their new personas when they were supposed to be strangers. Nureyev didn’t think that was breaking his golden rule either. He couldn’t imagine anyone not being attracted to Juno Steel.

But he wasn’t here and that was settling a heavy feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach. Too many unknowns. Too many, all centred around a person he cared about. Recipe for panic sparking through his nerves and poor decisions being made.

He tried to catch Rita or Jet’s eyes, tried to calmly and subtly convey the extreme anxiety raging behind his easy, playful bar patron’s expression. But at that moment the lighting shifted, swimming and coalescing on that centre platform. There was an old fashioned mic stand there now, clearly a shift in the entertainment to welcome the actual start of the evening. Though some glitzed up aspiring starlet caterwauling their way through some old Earth classics was hardly what he needed right now, when his boyfriend was AWOL in the middle of a mission. He ignored the gathering interest around the platform and scanned the available exits, head full of potential scenarios with the seller being tipped off somehow, grabbing Juno while everyone else was occupied, leaving him bleeding in the alleyways outside the bar…

Nureyev was halfway out of his seat, drink forgotten in front of him when an artificially amplified voice echoed through the bar room and stopped him in his tracks. No introduction, no preamble,

Just a soft, shy voice buoyed by the sweet piano music, a voice he knew well.

“The night is bitter

The stars have lost their glitter…”

Nureyev whirled his attention to where the rest of the patrons were focused, on the individual in the long, sleek red dress standing behind the microphone, his outfit simple compared to the others on display but so striking for that.

“The winds grow colder

Suddenly you're older…”

Nureyev knew he was gaping at him but he didn’t care. His curls were spilling out over the nape of his neck and forehead, looking so soft under the blue lighting. He looked otherworldly, like something fae and unnatural, glitter dusted over his bare shoulders where it would catch the light just so, the material of the dress shifting and spilling when he swayed to the piano. And his voice.

“And all because of the man that got away.”

Since when did Juno Steel have a voice like that?

If Nureyev had been able to tear his eyes away, he would have seen Rita standing towards the back of the crowd, jaw on the floor, eyes wide, hand having gone limp so a thin stream of neon green wine was dribbling onto the carpet from the bottle she was holding. He would have seen Jet with an eyebrow raised bemusedly, tapping his foot under the table, attention then caught by a man walking in looking more nervous than anyone out for a good time had any right to.

But all he saw was Juno. He was clearly shy at first, voice soft and small, his movements a little stiff. But as the song continued and the reactions from the crowd were clearly appreciative, he began to sway his hips slightly, taking his hands away from holding onto the mic stand in a death grip, letting them float at his sides as he sang. And he started to smile, soft and soulful like his song, full of wry bitterness and loss and longing.

“Every trick of his you're on to

But, fools will be fools

And where's he gone to?”

And then suddenly his eye was on Nureyev, picking him out in the crowd, narrowing the space between them to nothing until they could have been alone in his room back on the ship, voices hushed, lips brushing. And Juno’s smile quirked slightly, enough pin Nureyev to the bar, his breath coming out in a long, quiet exhale. He would make his dear heart sing for him, once this was done.

“The road gets rougher

It's lonelier and tougher

With hope you burn up

Tomorrow he will turn up

There's just no letup the live-long night and day…”

Nureyev could have fallen to his knees in that moment, with how deep and sweet his voice became, drunk without a single sip of his drink. But then Juno’s eye caught his again and slid pointedly over to a table in the shadowier corners. Their mark and the seller. A thin brown envelope being passed under the table, barely visible.

Nureyev went scarlet. Not one of his more professional moments.

He refocused, taking his crystal glass in his hand and sauntering over, like he was just looking for a better view of the stage, an easy thing to feign now Juno’s hands were resting on his chest in a gentle pantomime of heartbreak that was so very distracting. The mark was just getting up, clearly eager to make a quick exit. It was amateurish in the extreme, a millionaire really should have some more self awareness.

It was the simplest thing. Bump into him, the drink cascading over them both. Apologetic pleasantries, outraged exclamations. Pat ineffectually with a nearby napkin. Slip the envelope from the inner pocket and replace with a blank to mimic the weight. Pretend to only just notice that you have just swilled one of the richest men on Saturn and bid a hasty, flustered exit. Child’s play, as smooth and silken as when he’d first mastered the maneuver at thirteen.

Nureyev allowed himself a self satisfied smile, once he was out of view. It was good to know that some things would never go to rust.

He headed back to the stage, stopping to gently tip the wine bottle in Rita’s hand the right way then claim it for himself, taking a seat directly in front of the stage before tipping it to his lips, eyes fixed on Juno, a self satisfied smirk on his lips.

“Ever since this world began

There is nothing sadder than

A one-man woman looking for

The man that got away

The man that got away.”

There were a lot of rules when it came to working jobs, false facing, slipping on alibis like a second skin.

But no one said you couldn’t have fun.

Later, much later, Juno’s voice was raw and breaking from a full night of singing and the noises Nureyev had been drawing from him for the last three hours.

Considering his work done for now and smiling smugly, Nureyev let him fall back against his bed, curling around him and pillowing his head on his broad chest. There was still glitter clinging to his skin that would likely end up on Nureyev and refuse to budge for days but he couldn’t make himself care about that right now.

“Oh my god…” Juno was still panting, chest heaving, heart hammering against Nureyev’s ear, “I mean...oh my god, Nureyev…”

Nureyev chuckled, pressing a kiss to the warm skin beneath his head, “I rather enjoyed it too, dear heart. And I did say you’d be fairly rewarded for your performance, didn’t I?”

“I thought you meant you were gonna buy me a drink or something,” Juno laughed breathlessly, hands coming up to stroke through Nureyev’s soft hair, sort out where it was matted at the back from their efforts, “Not that.”

“Well, I did say the reward would fit the quality of your performance...and that was pretty spectacular.”

He heard the blush in Juno’s voice rather than saw it, he was far too comfortable in his current position, “Ah...I mean, I was alright. Just something I used to do when I was younger.”

“Oh?” Nureyev’s interest was sparked but he hid that. Juno spoke about his past so infrequently, even with all of their lengthy conversations before they’d fallen back into bed with each other. It was clearly still a wound and Nureyev had no desire to poke it.

“Yeah,” Juno continued on, “My brother was always in the school productions, even though it was always kind of crappy and the sets were junk and most kids' parents wouldn’t even come, he still lit up when it came back around. And because it was better than sitting on the curb waiting for him for hours, I signed up too. He was the real talent, Ben could sing, dance, act...everything. I could carry enough of a tune to get shoved into some minor roles but...whenever I sang, even if it was just a few lines, he’d go crazy applauding for me and grinning a mile wide. Really, I was just doing it to see him smile. I knew it made him happy when I joined in.”

Nureyev smiled gently at that, hand reaching out to  entwine his fingers with Juno’s, “I’m sure he’d have loved to see you sing tonight.”

“Oh, Ben would have laughed his ass off seeing me up there trying to be all femme fatale,” Juno hummed, holding Nureyev’s hand just as tightly, “But...yeah. It was hard not to think of him while I was up there.”

“And...what would he have made of the man drinking wine and watching you all gooey eyed, hm?”

“That asshole?” Juno cuddled Nureyev closer with his free arm, “Nah...he’d have liked you. He’d have realised you’re good for me.”

Nureyev buried his face in the crook of Juno’s neck, feeling a burst of delight in his chest at that, at the idea that he was good for someone.

And that someone was good for him.

[magioftheseas]

Burdensome

Summary: Sometimes, Hanako gets annoyed that he's the only one of the group with secrets.

Rating: G

Warning: None, really. I guess implications to Hanako’s vague past?

Notes: I honestly wrote this just to see if I could come up with a simple enough idea that would then be made into a fairly short fic. I’m trying to get more productive in my writing, see, so sometimes I have to resort to methods like that. In fact, I was so fixated on the idea of completing this before the day was over (and I had like, two hours before it did) that I ended up missing the deadline for applying to a zine I wanted to apply to. Now THAT’S burdensome.

***Alternate Ao3 Link***

Commission? Donate?

The world is filled with secrets. He’s known from the beginning that there are a lot of things that are kept from others. Crushes, concerns, dreams, ambitions, motivations—the deepest aspects of a person were often the most hidden.

He knows this well, and yet—

Those two are a bit different.

“Hanako-kun, what’s up?” Yashiro would ask, and the young exorcist would also glance his way. They both had such wide, honest and open gazes. “You’ve been staring for a while.”

“I was thinking,” Hanako says, waving his hand with his usual smile. “You two are way too easygoing.”

“Coming from a spirit!” Minamoto bit back as Yashiro similarly protested.

“I have plenty of worries not in the least thanks to you!”

“That’s not what I mean,” Hanako laughed. “You two are also pretty naïve, aren’t you?”

“And what is that supposed to mean, Hanako?!”

“Yeah, Hanako-kun! What do you mean?!”

What do you think?

Irritation nips at him. His smile twists the slightest bit.

Normal people have secrets. Normal people have baggage that they wouldn’t share with the world. I’ve observed the students here enough to know that hasn’t changed over the decades. You two, on the other hand...

Open books. Both of them. Even with their torn pages.

“Never mind,” Hanako chirps. “I was just thinking.”

“I bet you were,” Minamoto huffed as Yashiro pouted.

“I swear, Hanako-kun. It wouldn’t kill you to be more honest with us sometimes. You’re way too secretive.” She does pause, however. “O-Of course, I only expect you to tell us things when you’re ready.”

“Yeah, what senpai said.”

Even with the verbal agreement, there is a flicker of aggravation in the young exorcist’s eyes. An open book. Hanako already knows what he’s thinking about. It’s obvious. Too obvious. Minamoto Kou was a simple man of simple concerns, after all. He wanted to be respected, but he wanted to protect those around him. His family, friends, Yashiro—and the other Mitsuba.

Even now, Tsukasa lingers between them like blood in the water. They’re both just too afraid to bite because matters could escalate and that wouldn’t be ideal when Yashiro’s always a factor. That—and Minamoto was kind. He and Yashiro were both kind people. There was that, too.

Kindness was often granted as a privilege. It shouldn’t have been such an easy, accessible resource.

It’s cumbersome—how much the two humans that Hanako is closest to just don’t act like normal humans.

Yashiro was tugging at Minamoto’s sleeve, and she sways him into resuming their cleaning. With a sweet and disarming smile, the matter is settled and discarded. It might not ever get brought up again, because these two aren’t the types to hold grudges.

They’re kind. They’re just very, very kind.

How infuriating.

--

“Is there a reason why you’re giving those two attitude all of a sudden?” Tsuchigomori asks him. “You’ve got them complaining to me about you, Honorable Seventh. And y’know—I can’t exactly reprimand you as your teacher anymore.”

“And yet, you’re reprimanding me,” Hanako pointed out, tucked between the curtains. “I assume you do want me to stop.”

“It’s just troublesome behavior,” Tsuchigomori says with an impassive shrug. “Troublesome for them, for you, for me. Rather than just bottling it up, you should just vent.”

“It is annoying,” Yako chirped up in the midst of grooming her tail. “Those brats are going to keep on whining and it’ll soon be troublesome for everyone.”

“Don’t think we asked your opinion, dumb fox,” Tsuchigomori muttered, to which she hissed back.

“It’s hard to nap peacefully when everyone is as gloomy as you!”

“It’s because,” Hanako spoke up. Immediately, Tsuchigomori turns to face him, ever attentive. “I’m frustrated.”

“With what, exactly?” Yako asked, muffled against her tail. “Don’t tell me you’ve gotten bored of them.”

“Oh no, they’re still plenty fun to mess with.” Hanako waved his hand. “However—don’t you think it’s weird? Yashiro and that boy are both so simple. They don’t really have any deep dark secrets.”

“They don’t,” Tsuchigomori confirmed. “As transparent and blatant as they come. Do you feel awkward, then? Like you don’t fit in? You’re already an apparition, Honorable Seventh.”

Even as a human, I wouldn’t have fit in with them. Even acting as a human, I had to distance myself from them.

“Keeping secrets may be natural, but it is a burden you must undertake if decided.” Tsuchigomori inhales, sighing out smoke. “Even so, don’t act out so much.”

“They’re both still bratty garbage humans,” Yako murmured, ever unimpressed. “Tasteless and tactless.”

“I��m sure you’d make tasty udon,” Hanako cheerfully remarked.

Yako snorted, but curled up into an unassuming ball all the same.

“Honorable Seventh.”

That smile on Hanako’s face remained, even when stared down by Tsuchigomori’s stern, knitted glare.

“Do those humans make you feel inferior?”

Yako’s ear twitched, but she mercifully kept any further commentary to herself.

“Maybe a little,” Hanako admitted, laughing. “I get it. I’ll apologize. I’m sorry for the trouble, sensei.”

Tsuchigomori didn’t look remotely reassured or convinced.

Haven’t you prodded a little too much already? I could still squash you like a bug.

Aha. Those thoughts sound like something Tsukasa would say.

Hanako leaves without another word.

--

“You don’t have to say anything.”

Yashiro speaks the second he slinks in. She’s not looking his way but her hands are fisting into her skirt.

“It’s not like I don’t understand—sometimes people have a lot more going on. I get frustrated, too, when I see Aoi able to laugh off guys confessing to her. Aoi’s really carefree. Sometimes I envy her so much that I get upset.”

Hanako blinks, tugging at his collar awkwardly.

“Yashiro...”

“I know!” she exclaims. “So don’t—don’t treat me as if I’m shallow just because I might not have as much going on as you do! I’ll have you know I have plenty going on!” She turns on him, fierce despite her tears. “I-I actually really want to have a bunch of rodents! And I want to have a huge garden! A-And not only to I want to marry a handsome boy—I also think I want kids! A-A boy and a girl! It’s too early but—who knows! Having beautiful children might be really, really fun! I don’t know—but I think about it! One time I dreamed about my own daughter making fun of me for my legs! And I woke up crying!”

She was still crying right now, in fact.

“I’m going to graduate and I still want to be friends with Aoi even though she’s inevitably going to an elite college that I could never dream of attending! I-I also want to make more friends. I-I heard that—once you get to college, people start caring a lot less about their appearances...! But that because everyone’s all matured, they’re still super attractive...!” Yashiro blubbers. “I-I’m gonna graduate, I’m gonna go to college, I’m gonna grow up, I’m gonna get my garden, my rodents, my husband, my children, and, and, and... I’m still going to visit you if I can... Because I don’t want you getting lonely. Even if Tsuchigomori-sensei teaches here forever, I—I’ll worry about you, Hanako-kun.” She sniffles. “I’ll worry...a lot. What if you completely go off the deep end without me and Kou-kun? I’m—so worried!”

“Are you saying I’ll become a villain out of loneliness?” Hanako asked, mildly offended, mildly amused. “I was lonely before I met you for a long time.”

“That might make it worse,” Yashiro mutters. “Losing your friends is awful, even if you were friendless before.”

Friendless. I wasn’t really friendless. That said. That said...

“The fact that you’re so compassionate really does irk me,” he said. “Yashiro—you’re way too kind. Please be careful.”

“Or I’ll be taken advantage of, you mean?” Yashiro’s frown deepened, her cheeks darker. “I’m not helpless, Hanako-kun. I’m not always going to need you to save me. I’ll do my best to manage on my own. As well as I can.”

“I believe you. After all, I have underestimated you in the past.”

“Hanako-kun...” Yashiro huffed and she stomped forward. Raising her hand, she furiously ruffled Hanako’s hair. “You’re so immature! Don’t act like you’re not!”

“H-Hey, Yashiro.”

She knocks off his hat so that she can ruffle him harder.

“Immature! Childish! Bratty! Meanie! Hanako-kun!”

“Y-Yashiro, cut it out!”

Yashiro finally laughs at him. Hanako glares back, but then, after a while, his expression twists.

“Sometimes, it’s so heavy I can’t move. I should be glad you can move about so freely.”

Yashiro shakes her head, smile strained but sympathetic.

“We’re friends, Hanako-kun. If you want me to shoulder the burden with you, all you have to do is ask.”

I won’t. I refuse.

But Yashiro does hug him, and it’s far too easy to fall into her embrace.

She really isn’t one to be underestimated.

“There, there,” Yashiro coos, petting his hair. “There, there. Just let Nene-nee help you.”

Hanako chortled.

“I’m half a century older than you.”

Yashiro chuckles.

“You’re still a child, Hanako-kun.”

Still a child. She really is naïve. As if all I am is a child that desperately needs reassurance and validation. I needed more than that. We both did. But, still. Still, still, still.

Hanako’s lips pressed closely together as he buried his face into her shoulder.

I guess this is still nice.

[colorfullfalls]

Appreciated

Summary: An American assistant catches Kylo Ren's eye at a United Nations conference.

Kylo Ren did not appreciate Earth. The people were unaware of his power, of the First Order's power. He was undoubtedly taking over Earth whether it was liked or not. He didn't care. He was free to do what he pleased without anyone to stop him. The UN gathered to discuss the issue of what to do, if war was even an option. Kylo Ren was amused by Earth's citizens for thinking they had a choice. Even if there was a war, the First Order would dominate within hours. His light saber would kill any of these fool within seconds. The conference was held in the United States, tense anxiety looming over each member like a cloud. Kylo smirked at the intimidation of his starkiller hovering in the sky. One wrong move and he would wreak havoc.

His knights surrounded him as he walked through the streets earlier that day taking in the new scenes of the world that would soon be theirs. Women moved their babies away from the crew, men hesitated to keep walking, and kids pointed and whispered in awe. Attention that was not completely negative was foreign to him. Other world's would scream in fear and hatred as soon as their ships landed. But at the same time, Earth was so very unaware how things go when it came to him.

Washington D.C was busy as people filed into the House Chambers for the primal meeting. Kylo pushed past a few representatives of Spain as he walked in, his build larger than anyone else's. He rolled his eyes. This was all unnecessary to him, but he let them have their fun. Tomorrow he would take what was his. What was owed to him for his shitty upcoming with Luke.

He leaned against the back wall as the meeting began. Everyone in the room was dressed in suits or pant suits or even dresses. Clothes here were much different than he was customed to. Listening was no priority of his because this damn gathering was equal to a child's birthday celebration in his eyes. Meaning that nothing was going to be accomplished.

You slipped in beside him holding five coffees on a tray. You glanced at the beast beside her but kept going. You could not afford to deliver cold coffees during such a crisis. Your job depended on it. American representatives took the coffees wand practically shooed you away without a single thank you. Shoulders sagging, you went to walk back out to grab their sandwiches.

Kylo watched the encounter with confusion. They took the coffees without even looking at you, and you were somehow okay with it? His people served him but that's because he was in charge. He didn't say thank you, didn't need to. But these low lives? What possible status could they have? One among hundreds at a meeting. Earth was odd because it was divided, different leaders ruling different areas. In his eyes it made Earth weak.

You were breathtakingly beautiful. Short hair framed your face, cascading to rest right about the shoulders. You looked unbelievably kind with your soft smile even though you just got treated like scum. You looked like a woman who should be Queen of a prosperous planet, not an unappreciated assistant of sorts.

"Come here." Kylo's voice caught not only your attention, but also the people's around you. Your eyes adverted to him, ghostly pointing a finger at yourself in confusion.

"M-me?"

"Yes, you, come."

You sheepishly trudged over, terrified that the Supreme Leader would kill you. His hair fell over some of his face as he looked expectantly down at you. You went to kneel in front of him but his gloved hand grabbed your bicep.

"State your position."

"Assistant, sir."

He clicked his tongue in amusement at you calling him sir. Such a beauty in a shitty place. Your voice was soft and unsure. It made his hard exterior slightly melt away. His mother once told him when he was a young boy that you only truly fall in love once. That your soul only binds completely with another one single time. Woman usually were not that desirable to him. He would have sex with them but he never cared about them. He was already interested in you.

"Seems beneath you. Follow me."

You swallowed heavily at the order, but before you could protest his knights were crowding behind you. A silent demand that you comply to their leader's wish. You sighed. Today was simply not your day. A black ship was parked outside in the yard, white armored Storm Troopers surrounding it. They stared at you earlier when you had walked past to deliver coffee. Not friendly folks, you presumed. Kylo waved his two fingers and his guard dogs shifted, allowing a clear path to the entrance ramp.

Kylo walked in first and turned around, leaning against the wall. Apparently that was his usual. Yet again his fingers moved to signal his knights away. They nodded their heads and in synch left down the ramp to guard themselves. His dark hair flowed slightly against the light breeze.

"Earth is a pitiful thing." He declared, "Technology is far behind other planets, no alien species habitat the area, and the people here? They are senseless. My troops could destroy this place."

You sighed, "I am not a leader. I cannot discuss terms with you. Leaders are in the room you just took me out of."

He rolled his eyes at your lack of understanding. He wanted you to understand that he was tolerating Earth for the day, but he wanted to more than tolerate you.

"I do not wish to discuss terms with you." Your eyes snapped to his. You had been in many situations where you had zero power. You were to listen and do what was told because the people you work for are above you. In charge. While you work your ass off and still are struggling to announce yourself as a successful woman. Again, Kylo Ren was way way way above you on terms of authority. Being an assistant woman on Earth is no comparison to the handsome and aggressive man before you.

"Why then...?"

"Why what? Say it." His voice was demanding and goosebumps traveled down your arms and surely to your legs too.

"Why did you bring me here? Oh no.. am I going to die to set an example? Of course this is the karma for not picking up that Hitchhiker the other day. Paranoia is what gets me killed... Mom would be proud." You rambled to yourself, hands running down your face in frustration.

Kylo shook his head no, not liking that you assumed the worst of him, "I am not killing you. Tell me your name."

"Y/N."

He hummed in appreciation of your name, never hearing it before. It somehow suited you perfectly. He nodded, "I'm Kylo."

You nervously barked out a laugh, "Yes. Kylo Ren. I am aware of that, infact the whole world is. Did I do something to disrespect you earlier?"

"You were disrespected."

This took you by surprise. The lethal Kylo Ren, Supreme Leader of the First Order, Han and Leia's only heir was pressed at how you were treated by your asshole bosses. Being a moderately pretty woman gained you attention from time to time, but catching his eye was beyond you. Unknown to you Kylo was reading your mind. It was easy to slip into.

Kylo was stunned that you referred to yourself as moderately pretty. In his eyes you were the most beautiful being his brown eyes landed on. Maybe it was his Mother's tale about soulmates that was getting to him. He considered this very carefully. He did know you or your soul, but could the force be giving him a hint that you would be his one life partner? Either way he was not letting you rot here.

"Not really. It comes with the job because that's how things work around here." You retorted, glancing outside to see people looking in at you. An elderly man stood on the skirts of the lawn, worrying that you were in harm's way. You offered a wave followed by a thumbs up and it was enough because he continued on.

"Do you think you deserve to be treated as such?"

"I'm a hard worker but so are millions of people who get the short end of the stick."

Kylo rolled his eyes and pointed outside, "Blowing this place up may be considered a favor. This is the supposed greatest country's capital and there are homeless here."

"Anyone can be poor anywhere. Earth has it's flaws, sir, but I can assure you that there is good here." You crossed your arms in a defying manner. This was your home.

"Good and bad are not definite, both coexist in a complicated manner. Whoever disagrees is an imbecile." He snarled, hand hitting the wall in anger. Both at you defending Earth and for not listening to him.

How could you defend a planet that was full of selfish pricks who were living lavishly with billions of dollars while more poor swarmed the streets than flies. Kylo took care of his people once they were under his rule. The First Order elegantly supported struggling citizens according to need. Earth seemed like a waste of his time. It only infuriated him at how poorly it was doing.

"What do you want from me?" You quietly asked. Escaping was impossible. Troops surrounded the ship and Kylo Ren was said to be stubborn.

"Power comes with loneliness, Y/N. Consulting with my officers leaves me in a position to be weak. Being weak revolts me. As beautiful as you may be, you are weak."

You scoffed in disbelief, "Excuse me?"

His body moved to surrounded yours like a lion going after a gazelle. His body pinned you, hands rested close to your head against the solid black wall, "You are weak. You take shit from worthless money makers with no true value. Earth raised you this way. But I am here to change that. You will be more."

"More?"

"Yes. We can help one another. For you, I will give you power. No longer will those beneath you take you for granite." His voice was stern like he had all the answers in a tiny book that only he had access to.

"Yeah? What about you, Supreme Leader?"

"Glad you asked. I need someone to confide in without the risk of being overthrown. The force within me senses trust and loyalty. Simply words are what I require from you."

Compromises rarely proved helpful in your case. Set backs always trailed along with them like a loose string on an old sweater. Untangled until nothing but scraps were left. Kylo Ren was a snake. A successful murderer who worked for his cause alone. But what did you have to lose at this point? Your family shut you out after you moved away, you were really too busy for friends, and certainly busy enough to not have a significant other. Leaving Earth behind did not sound that bad. Not when what was offered was appreciation in turn for treating a someone like a decent human being.

"Okay. On one condition."

Kylo's head leaned down so that he was looking into your eyes, "Go on."

"Protect Earth instead of destroying it. I'm not dumb, this place has shitty people but there are simple pleasures that I want maintained. Old tribes, trains, caramel candy, the cultures, high school baseball games, fireworks, cows in pastures, and dogs. Dogs are so very sweet and we don't deserve them. Just please..."

Kylo leaned away from you, crossing his strong arms over his chest. Your eyes tried to look as pleading as possible. He didn't want to give in. Earth was pretty annoying and it being wiped out of the sky would please him to an outrageous extent. But the way you were asking so nicely with every ounce of his heart, he contemplated it. Not to mention that it meant he would finally have someone to talk real conversations with.

"Deal."

[kpopchangedme]

In-Depth | Jackson Wang [M]

Ambushing Jackson in the locker room for an interview was a bad idea. Now you might find out why his talents outside the basketball court are also praised by the masses...

Protagonists: Jackson Wang & You

Word Count: 3,4k

Genre: NSFW - F*ck Boy - University - Strangers - SMUT - [Drabble 2k]

Prompts: “Oh yeah, and what are you going to do about it?” + “Don’t touch what’s not yours”

**explicit content* *dirty talk* *female oral* *unprotected intercourse (DON’T)* *worship* *breath play* *what has my life become**

Requested by: @wangslut7 J’espère que tu vas aimer, je me suis un peu emportée... ;)))) and it turned really steamy...

GOT7 | M.list

The man frowns walking in but barely slows down. You keep a wiped clean expression when his eyes detail you, sitting on the counter, wearing a long skirt and summer blouse. Your heart still skips a beat though, betraying your professional intentions. Glistening with sweat, Jackson Wang throws his gym bag on a wooden bench, still staring at you like you’re an apparition. It’s because you don’t fit in, shouldn’t be in a men’s locker room at 6 AM, but you intended that as a mind trick. Showing up at an unexpected place to get a scoop or an interesting interview… And Lord knows Jackson owes you one. He’s been blowing off your university newspaper for months; not showing up at scheduled interviews and avoiding the usual questions after a big game.

“Were you this desperate to see me naked?” He quirks a brow, flexing his bicep as he throws open his locker. There’s no question, he remembers what you’re here for, but it’s typical behaviour coming from him. You try to avoid noticing how his damp tank top clings to his back muscles but fail. In the end, your eyes drop to the safety of the notepad resting on your thighs.

“Is it true that your mother used to wake you up at 5 in the morning every day for stretching exercises?”

“Is that how you found me?” The hot player scoffs slightly deterred. “You know I don’t talk about my mother.”

“It’s alright,” you scribble something, unaffected by his coldness since you expected this reaction, “I already talked to her last Friday. Amazing lady, very nice and proud of you.”

His jaw clenches, “The game where I scored over 60 points? Write about that.”

“Everyone knows about that…” You reply confidently, holding his gaze. “I want to write something substantial, an in-depth interview about the real Jackson Wang.”

“Really?” A dangerous smile suddenly stretches Jackson’s face. “If I knew you wanted to have me deep, I would’ve made us happened sooner.” This doesn’t even make you flinch. Wang has a reputation, apparently, plenty of girls want an extensive experience with a self-obsessed Point Guard. He’s hot, you aren’t blind. Now that you’re standing alone in the same room as him, you can totally relate. You blink, trying to mask the effect the man has on you. “What’s your name, doll?”

Fricking. Doll.

“You’ve been told many times, but I guess you’re forgetful when women talk.”

“You’re smart,” Jackson chuckles, taking his sticky tank top off. You concentrate on his face, not letting your eyes wander lower on his ripped body. He’d like that way too much… And maybe you would too. “Join me in the shower, promise I’ll never forget you again.”

“Y/n, for the Uni’ paper. Remember it.” You nervously replace a strand of hair that went astray behind your ear. Suddenly the room feels very warm. “Do you have any favourite Chinese restaurants in town where a fan might run into you?”

“Are you always so frigid, doll? I could help with that.” Unphased, Jackson slips his fingers in the waistband of his gym shorts, sliding them down his thighs and calves in one swift go. Jesus, his briefs are gone too. Your whole face burns at his exposure, but he doesn’t seem embarrassed at all. He grins, observing your shyness and walks up to you. Instinctively, you press your back against the wall and your thighs together.

He attempts to steal your notebook, but you hiss like an animal, clutching to it and staring at the ceiling; “Don’t touch what’s not yours.”

“Feisty,” Jackson licks his lips, scrutinizing you, “I’m a traditional man... I’ll take you to my favourite place if you shower with me.”

You make the mistake of inhaling through your nose, he’s close now but you had not realized he was also in the air all around you. The manly scent of his sweat and skin is arousing, mind-numbing, you can almost taste him. Shit. Lord knows you aren’t made of stone. Being in the same room as a hot naked man is a bit much for your brain, especially if he’s hitting on you. Ambushing Jackson was a bad idea after all. 

“Do you have a boyfriend?” The player’s gaze slide on your neck to the little triangle of bare skin in the middle of your chest. There’s nothing impressing there to see but still, he exhales softly, like he’s affected. “Or are you a good good girl, y/n?”

“I ask the questions,” you try one last time to sound convincing and get him to focus on the interview. “You’re naked.”

Ok, not a question.

“Oh yeah,” Jackson steps even closer, trapping you on the counter. His tanned shoulders glimmer rendered sticky by dried sweat from his morning training. “And what are you gonna do about it?”

Fuck. People were right.

He’s dangerous, he has that little something that makes you lose your mind and go full-on primal. Your second mistake is to look down at his body. Until now you had managed to concentrate on his dark brown eyes or your surroundings.

Of course, Jackson Wang is ripped like a god, every muscle under his honey-toned skin shaped to perfection. When you see his already half-hard dick something in your lower stomach pinches violently. Screw the interview. You fell into your own trap this morning.

“You don’t look like you have a boyfriend,” he muses, unbothered by your silence. His right hand brushes your ankle, decidedly climbing your calf to your thigh under your skirt, leaving your skin electrified at the touch. It stops behind your knee. “You look like you’re imagining me fucking you raw on that counter.” Your breath hitches as he roughly pulls your leg until you’re against him. Instinctively your arms wrap around his bare shoulders to stay straight and he presses into your clothes. “Am I right?”

“I-I’ve never done that before.” You hush in admittance, shutting both eyes and already giving up. That sounded like a promising offer. Jackson Wang’s talents outside the court are also praised by the masses. You’re too turned on to care about his fuck boy ways or your interview anymore. You bet a guy like him and a girl like you isn’t the most unexpected thing to happen in this locker room.

“Of course, you haven’t,” Jackson chuckles lowly before kissing your throat, “But do you want to now?”

It’s not like you’ll see him again and to be honest you’ve been thinking about it since the first time you saw him. “Yes.” You don’t hang with the same crowd, might as well have fun with him.

Immediately, his hand climbs back under your skirt, reaching your panties only to get rid of them. “You’re such a good girl,” Jackson muses, not slowing down, “so open for me...” His voice is huskier than before, and you cling to him when his fingers meet your folds.

Your eyes open into his and you read his surprise at your wetness. You grind closer to his hand, craving friction and Jackson stares for a long second, frozen. Dropping your head in the crook of his neck, you repeat the motion and suck on his collarbone. He’s probably marvelling about how compliant you’re being. Should you have been playing hard to get? Thankfully he doesn’t seem to mind any longer and he exhales shakily, inserting his fingers inside you with ease. You smirk into his skin, he’s in for a joy ride, you’re full of surprises. You aren’t his usual type, just like he isn’t yours, but that doesn’t mean you are anything close to frigid.

“So wet,” He murmurs, curving his fingers and making you raise your pelvis, “you have the softest little pussy ever. Did you know that?” You grip his shoulders tighter, digging your nails in harshly. When you roll your hips forward to fuck his hand, Jackson laughs in disbelief. “Someone could walk in…”

“You’d better fuck me fast then.”

“Tsst,” he hisses in disappointment, shaking his head and claiming his hand back, “I didn’t become the best by half-assin’ things...”

“The best?” You curve a brow, observing as he suggestively licks his fingers clean.

“Yes, the best.” Jackson frowns, rolling up your skirt to expose you. He inhales sharply when he succeeds, “Such a pretty pussy, I bet it taste like heaven.” The words should feel cringey but with his low deep tone... It’s the sexiest thing anyone has ever said to you. The guys you usually hook up with would never dare do anything like that anyway.

“Jesus.” You accidentally hit your head on the mirror in your back when Jackson presses a kiss on top of your pubis. He’s already going for it and he tugs at your legs again, pinning your ass down on the counter to allow himself better access. One of his thumbs digs your inner thigh while his other hand spreads your labia. “F-Fuck.” Jackson licks your cunt fully, lapping your juices off like it’s honey. You immediately fist his damp hair, holding to him.

“Delicious,” he groans, and your eyes roll back in your head. At the sound, you fell your insides tremble in answer. “I love to make good girls say dirty things…”

“J-Jackson,” you manage to get out haltingly as he teases you, stubble on his chin rubbing your private sensitive parts tortuously, “I’ll… die if someone walks in.”

“Why?” He chuckles, “You’re being so good right now...” He swirls his tongue on the bud of your clit and you cover your mouth to keep from embarrassing yourself. Ok, maybe this was the best damn decision of your entire life. Rumours were true, he is amazing at this. Your walls clench from pleasure when he inserts two fingers. Jackson builds you up easy and fast, sucking on your mound while his fingers curl and your hips jolt forward.

“Fuck!”

“So swollen, doll,” he hums in appreciation against your sex, “are you alright?”

“I-I…” You gasp for air, struggling to line up words that aren’t obscenities, but Jackson understands.

Your thighs are already shuddering of their own accord, out of control. He keeps working hard, circling, moving quickly. He’s relentless, tongue and hand merciless. Jackson keeps curving his fingers, holding your legs open with his whole body. You break after a particularly harsh suck on your clit and his fingers’ back and forth seems to hit something deeper buried inside of you. You come apart, crying out. Shivers run on your spine and goosebumps spread on your skin. Jackson holds you down as you jolt forward in ecstasy. His mouth remains, licking your sex clean of your arousal squirting out. When he finally stands, it’s only because you’re so overpowered you must push him back. You might come again right away if he keeps this up.

“Shit...” You curse, hand on your chest to calm your heartbeat. Your whole body feels numb and heavy. Jackson stares at you in awe, almost like he’s the one who just came. You never orgasmed that intensely with anyone before. What the hell just happened?

“Wow.” He breathes out, looking at you with round eyes instead of his usual smug smirk.

He’s also a wreck, full wet lips and messy hair sticking up in the air. When a man eats pussy like that, it’s clear he deserves to be praise to the skies. You can’t resist and you wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him down for a first kiss. Jackson follows, crashing his mouth on yours without any restraint. Your tongues meet rudely, you’re both way past caring about being decent anymore. Eager, one of your hands runs down his tone body to get a hold of his erected dick. Jackson lets you work your magic, too busy kissing you and caressing your thighs to care. Your fingers course on his burning sticky skin, taking their time to graze his pecks, abs, sliding on his back to explore the muscles of his ass. When you finally take him in your palm, he instantly groans, snuggling closer. Amused, you stroke him a few times, smearing his precum with your thumb.

“I think you promised to fuck me…” You say although you aren’t sure you can take it anymore and he pauses his kissing, pulling back.

“Get down,” Jackson orders darkly, making a shiver of excitation run down your back. You obey, sliding down the counter to stand in front of him on your wobbly legs. If someone was to come in right now, they’d wonder what he’s doing naked when you are still fully clothed. Jackson presses a kiss on your lips one last time before spinning you towards the counter. Obediently, you bend over, staring at him in the mirror as he lifts your skirt again, taking his time. “Fuck, you have the best ass... Why hide it?” Jackson stops to firmly massage it with both hands, grunting and rolling his hips forward. His cock brushes your over-sensitive parts and you grip the counter, holding your breath for what’s to come. He doesn’t seem too stressed and keeps toying with your ass, rolling his palms to raise your cheeks and releasing your skin to watch them bounce.

“Jackson…” You bemoan and he meets your eyes in the mirror, a cocky grin plastered on. “F-Fuck me while I can still take it.”

He chuckles, pulling again until you’re practically bent in half. He rocks his hips, running his dick on your wetness and letting out a satisfied groan. “Don’t worry,” his jaw clenches in concentration as he aligns himself at your swollen entrance, “I’ll give you in-depth, one on one Jackson Wang, baby doll.”

You’re about to reply something snarky when he pushes in, making you forget whatever you were going to say. While one of his hands predictably stays on your ass, the other comes up to fist your hair. You arch, allowing him deeper. Jackson pulls back until his tip is almost completely out before thrusting forward powerfully. Unable to remain quiet, you cry when he fills you again, stretching your hypersensitive sex in the most delicious way.

“O-Oh, shit!” Jackson picks up a rough pace, fingers bruising your ass to hold you still. “Fuck!” You gasp every time your skins meet.

“Such a dirty,” he thrusts, almost making your teeth clatter, “dirty mouth!”

“Please, please don’t s-stop!” You beg and Jackson’s grin widens.

“Your pretty pussy is so soft and wet, doll.” He wipes sweat from his brows, still tugging at your hair. “I could fuck it forever.”

Your eyes shut at his words, and your walls clench around him. Waves of pleasure already course through your body. Jackson keeps going evermore, faithful to his claim. Every push now has you trembling, and he releases your hair, wrapping his hand to hold your throat instead. He doesn’t add pressure. The messy moans you’re letting out are vibrations on his palm, and it’s clearly doing things to him.

Jackson pants behind you, “Open your eyes.” He commands and you execute, holding his gaze in the mirror with heavy eyelids. “You’re so tight. S-Shit.” You clench once more around his cock and he groans, sliding a foot to spread your legs further apart. “Are you really…” He fucks harder and your whole body shudders unable to take it much longer. “… Gonna come again just like this? I haven’t done anything yet.”

You stare in disbelief, fighting a new rush of thrill. You’ve already came once; he must be kidding. “What else can you d-do?”

“Oh, doll…” Jackson chuckles, shaking his head slightly. “I am the best.”

You gulp, throat bobbing in his hand. Perhaps he’s just being cocky, but he’s been amazing so far… Your insides jitter and you cry out. Fuck, you aren’t going to be able to last forever, unlike a certain someone. As if aware of this, Jackson’s hand on your neck tightens lightly. The action limits your air supply but curiously, the new sensation isn’t horrible, far from it. Your eyes go wide when your lungs tingle in protestation. Jackson bites his lips, observing your expression in the looking glass. Weirdly enough, you’re even more turned on than before. The hand on your throat is distracting you from your throbbing, over-stimulated folds. Attentive, Jackson releases you and oxygen suddenly fills your burning chest, nearly making you come right away. You heave, letting out a litany of curses and clutching to the counter for dear life. Jackson laughs, thumb stroking your jaw gently as it relaxes.

“Again?” He asks and you surprise yourself by promptly nodding. His hand tightens around your throat once more and this time you’re more than ready. He keeps burying himself into you, your whole body is on fire, lungs and sex about to explode. Your thighs begin to shake violently and your back curves. You’re lightheaded, you’re about to break and come again. Knowing, Jackson releases the pressure at the right moment, letting air fills your lungs abruptly.

All those sensations at once are overwhelming. You cling to the counter, out of your mind when you come undone. You’re quaking, riding the waves of your second orgasm and Jackson gives up too. His muscles tense and his hips gradually come to a stop. He presses against your ass, twitching and emptying himself completely. His hot cum fills you in spurts.

You are still completely out of it when he pulls back and his cock falls out, done. Jackson is still short-winded, but he starts cleaning you off with a paper towel right away. His touch is strikingly delicate as he wipes what’s leaking down on your inner thigh.

“Your perfect pussy took it all so well, doll.” He whispers in your ear like it’s your secret to keep before kissing your neck. Your silence doesn’t seem to bother him much and he bends to pick up your discarded underwear. Jackson helps you step in like you’re an impotent little girl. For once in your life, you certainly feel like one. He even replaces your skirt expertly as nothing happened. You try to keep your thumping heart and you’re erratic breathing under control when he hugs you tightly.

Jackson Wang is actually hugging you… Minutes after fucking you into oblivion.

“Wait here,” he presses a series of pecks on your jaw, not minding your dazed state, “I’ll shower real quick.”

“Actually…” you are still holding onto the counter when he pulls away, “I should probably show–”

“You should probably sit here and wait for me, like a good girl.” Jackson grins widely, forcing you to go sit down next to his abandoned gym bag. “The swimming team has a morning practice at 7:30.”

“Oh!” Panicked, you turn to look at the digital clock on the wall. “I should go!”

“Stay,” Jackson doesn’t even bother looking back to see if you’re obeying. He’s already in the open massive showers, half-yelling to be heard over the running water; “Let’s grab breakfast if you don’t have plans!” You watch his back as he washes off any traces of you and his morning training. What’s left of his cum sticks inside your panties, it feels unfair that he’s the only one getting cleaned. Still, you choose to accept, curious at the perspective of sharing a meal with him but already hating yourself for being so excited about it.

“Okay,” you yell back, jumping on your shaky legs to fix your hair and makeup in the mirror where you just watched him fuck you, “but only because you still owe me an interview!”

“I’m sure you have plenty of amazing things to write about me now!” Jackson laughs, shutting the water off. “Then we can go to my place. I’ll show you what else I can do.”

You bite your lips, wiping a smudge of mascara from under your eye. “Sounds great,” you manage to reply just before he reappears in all his wet, steamy, god-like glory.

“Great,” A still very naked Jackson repeats, grinning like a little kid as he steps into his clean sweatpants, “you won’t regret it.” Perhaps clothes should be forever banned from campus. The thought never occurred to you before.

Cautiously exhaling, you feel the familiar pinch of arousal in your lower stomach watching him get dressed. Again? You’re still throbbing everywhere but apparently, you’re already excited for next round. Feeling your gaze on him, Jackson turns, winking as he puts his t-shirt on. His abs stretch deliciously before sadly ending up being covered.

“I’m sure I won’t…”

GOT7 | M.list

[20dollarlolita]

Okay, so, let’s go to step 2 of the guide on making your first lolita dress.

Yesterday, in step 1, we talked about why you should find a dress and copy it when you’re making your first lolita dress, why that’s different from buying a replica, and a bit about patterns you can use as a base for making your copy.

You probably also want to read the introduction post, which is split into part 1 (things to know about lolita) and part 2 (things to know about sewing lolita).

So I was thinking about just making a series of post like that about most of the steps of making your first lolita dress, and subsequently your first lolita coordinate, with both lolita quality and accessible budget in mind.

I’ve got similar resources on this blog, but a lot of them are from roundabouts 2014, before I finished costume college, before I started working freelance in costume design, before I ever took a fashion design/merch class, before the styles of lolita had moved to their current trends, before shopping in store and online had picked up the trends they are in now, and a lot more. It’s the new decade, so let’s rewrite this from my more experienced viewpoint.

So, grab yourself a dress you like, and a pattern. Let’s talk about how to do some really basic pattern manipulation, how to identify fabrics and trims that you’ll want to use, and the vocabulary you need to shop for them online.

I know these series are kind of long. This isn’t a difficult process, but there’s a lot to it, and I don’t want to skip over anything crucial.

It’s difficult to explain, but what we’re going to do is learn how to pick a pattern and shop for making a dress using actual lolita as a reference, instead of assuming that some Simplicity designer who bootlegged a dress pattern has any idea what she’s actually looking at can guide you into making something coherently lolita.

So, let’s start by grabbing a pattern we like, and finding a dress we can use with that pattern. We’re going to use Simplicity 8444, because it’s a shape that applies to a whole ton of lolita, and the pattern is ready for border prints.

This is a JSK with full back shirring. I’m going to assume that you’ve done enough research to know this, but JSK is short for “jumperskirt”, and means a dress without sleeves. Shirring is where you gather up the fabric with lines of elastic, making it stretchy and available to fit more sizes. A dress with full back shirring or partial back shirring has elastic in just the back (or just part of the back). A dress with full shirring has shirring all the way around the bodice.

So let’s go to Lolibrary and look at other dresses that are basic JSKs with partial shirring.

Lolibrary has a filter, so you can sort it to only show you dresses with that option. Then, all you have to do is find one that you like, that more closely resembles your pattern. There’s 113 pages of results for just this search, so feel free to also narrow it down by brand, year, or by adding other features.

For example, I narrowed my search down by adding the tags of “plaids”, “solids”, “polka-dots”, and “florals.” I picked these because I know these fabric patterns are easy to find.

<This got REALLY long, so I’m going to save everyone’s dashes and stick a jump right here>

When you’re looking at printed dresses, focus on the design of the dress, and the way the colors and motifs are laid out, but do not limit yourself to just motifs that you like. If you don’t like swans, but you like the way they colors look on a swan-themed dress looks when you hold it at arm’s length and squint, consider that dress. Motif will probably change (more on that later).

Here’s a couple of dresses that I’d avoid, because those stripes of lace that run from the bodice’s princess seams down and onto the skirt would require some re-patterning.

Here’s a few that I’d avoid just because they’re as incredibly simple. If you’re making something simple, you need to get the proportions and trim really right, or else you’ll look like you bought your dress on Wish.

And here’s four dressed that I ended up liking for this pattern. Three of them are Meta, which doesn’t actually say anything about Metamorphose as a brand, and says a lot about the limited research that I did when I was looking this up.

I really, really suggest using a resource like Lolibrary for this research, because it’ll tell you the year the piece was released. This will be incredibly helpful later on. If you’re just using google images, not only will you have to fight your way through a lot of unrelated, not-lolita content, but you’ll also have no context for who released the dress and when.

We’re going to use the one on the rightmost side of the image as our sample. It’s Meta’s 2016 release, Strawberry Garden Stripe Ribbon JSK.

We are absolutely doing this because Meta has a technical illustration for this dress, on the bottom. Up top is the Simplicity front and back views for view A of 8444.

From these, we can see the changes we need to make pretty clearly. Here’s our plan of attack:

Remove the frills from the straps

Change trim application on the front of the bodice

Remove that weird line of lace around the bottom of the bodice

Add a ruffle to the bottom

Add waist ties

We’re going to say that two changes are optional, due to a combination of the difficulty of the necessary pattern manipulation, and the fact that they’re not crucial details. We’re not going to redo the back of the JSK to be a partial back shirring with a corset lacing. We’re going to justify that by saying that the corset lacing is in the back, and that a lot of people take out the corset lacing entirely to get some extra breathing room.

We’re also not going to scallop the hem. While I actually have a pretty darn great tutorial on scalloped hems, if I do say so myself, getting that ruffle on under the scallop will require adding a slip, which is a bit much. Instead, we’re just going to add the bows at the hem and hope no one will notice. We’re going to justify this by saying that there’s a lot of lolita dresses that don’t have that scallop, so our omission isn’t removing anything that’s absolutely a crucial part of the look, and that it’s so subtle that skipping it will probably be unnoticed.

If you’re newer to sewing, or just don’t do this kind of pattern manipulation too often, or just don’t want to overcomplicate your very first lolita dress, doing small changes like this is acceptable. However, you want to keep them small, and have a good justification for doing so.

Since our changes that we’re making are all pretty cosmetic, we don’t need to start this by taking out our pattern and cutting it up. We could just jump in to making it by the pattern instructions, and doing our adjustments more or less on the fly.

Or, well,

we could just jump in, if we had our fabric and trim.

So let’s do that.

Since prints are the hardest thing to match, I start by looking for a suitable one.

For the main fabric, you can sort of skip matching the motif, as long as you keep the color pallet and scale of the piece. In other words, it’s less important to have a strawberry print, and more important to have a print that has a smaller, widely-spaced motif with a larger, more colorful detail around the hem.

I went onto Fabric.com, searched “border print”, and grabbed some images that had the spacing we needed. None of these are of strawberries and bunnies, and none of them are light pink with red detail.

Out of all these fabrics, the cherry one on the right is the closest to the strawberry print, but I don’t like wearing cherries, so I’m eliminating that one.

Then next thing I do is look at what kind of fabric the print is printed on. While quilt cotton is...*sigh*...yeah, I guess it can be fine...if the print is on something more substantial, you’ll have a better chance of success.

So, we have four of these on plainweave cotton prints, and two on stretch sateen. Stretch sateen is a better fabric for this than the quilt cotton is.

Remember when I said that copying a dress does not remove your need to be a designer? Here’s where this starts to become very apparent. We don’t have access to the same fabrics that Meta had four years ago, and we’re going to have to decide what we want to work with.

As previously mentioned, I don’t like wearing cherries. I’m not fully sold on the spacing on the other sateen one. I feel like the border of the flowers is too large, and the non-border is too closely spaced and cluttered to match the specific dress that I’m modeling this after. Again, the motif doesn’t matter as much as the spacing.

Here’s the skirt, next to a photoshopped version of the print. This print isn’t available with a white background, but I put it on a white background to (hopefully) better illustrate my concerns with the spacing in the upper part of the print.

At this point, my instincts are saying to give up, scream, “I WANT SWANS,” and pick the dark blue fabric, but instead, I just keep researching more fabrics. The swans are also a double border print, which is fine. However, when you have a double border, you have less of the upper fabric per yard. This can get tricky when you’re making your bodice. So, instead, I keep looking for a border print, on a sateen or twill, with a relatively narrow border and a wide spacing in the upper area, and with a somewhat analogous color pallet.

There’s something to be said for perseverance getting you what you need, in situations like these.

I found a couple more border prints that I liked. The top one is from Mood, and the bottom one is this Spoonflower print.

I like the Mood one, but I don’t like it for this dress. It’s a monochromatic color pallet, and there’s no pattern in the upper area of the print. The Spoonflower one is cute, but the print make clearly designed it with the top area intended for something and I don’t know if that design will work with the dress model we have. Also, Spoonflower’s price for this in twill is $26/yard, which isn’t super friendly if your goal is to save money by making your own lolita.

However, I did find my favorite print for this dress concept.

It’s a stretch sateen with a nice color pallet. It’s a single border print. The print isn’t upside-down, and it’s decently spaced up top (though closer than I’d love). Also, it’s skulls and freaking ravens. It’s also only $9 a yard.

So yes, I’m using a fabric that’s theme and motif is about as far from happy pink bunnies eating strawberries as we can possibly go.

At this point, I did a bit more research, just to see if there were any JSKs in a darker theme that were still styled like our original one. I found this BtSSB JSK that used black lace and ribbon to keep a dark theme with the sweeter styling. This convinced me that this fabric can work in this application. Because of that I queued up 4 yards of that skull fabric in my shopping card, and held that to the side, while I looked at trims.

.

Note: If all that fabric shopping looked too complex, find a dress with a polka-dot or solid color fabric, and then look for a fabric in a sateen or lightweight twill. If you’re doing a more classic or gothic look, also check out tropical suitings. You can also find a dress with an all-over print, which gives you more options when trying to match print scale/spacing/pallet. Border prints are trickier than other prints due to their relative scarcity, which is why I chose to illustrate that process here.

.

So, first, we inventory what trim we need:

Beige circle: Contrasting fabric for waist tie back and bottom ruffle. Green circle: Embroidered lace (or any gathered lace with lots of drape), about 2.5″ wide for top edge of bodice Purple circle: Embroidered lace, about 1″ wide, for bottom hem, bow ends, and princess seams Red circle: Coordinating fabric for bows on front, shoulders, and hem.

Lolibrary’s listings will usually tell you what kinds of laces are used in a dress. There’s something to be said for swapping laces out, but it’s a good starting place.

My print has white, black, and red on it. While not universal, you get different feelings from different contrast decisions.

Using white lace on a black or dark background looks more old school lolita. Using black lace on a black background looks more refined, and slightly more gothic. Using red lace is a huge pain and looks more Hot Topic than lolita. However, using a red fabric to coordinate the small bows will probably look balanced. I’ll take the option to match the darkest red in the fabric, and use that to keep the whole look toned down.

Fabric.com has a good floral chantilly lace in black, which I’ll use for all the pink-circled lace parts. I bought enough to put my purchase into the free shipping category. That’s more than I need, but I always need lace, so it’ll be fine. Because the motifs in my print are skulls, roses, and ravens, I’m especially looking for trims that have any of those in it. It’s much easier to find roses than the other two, but if I find venise lace skulls you can bet your petticoats that I’m buying all of it.

Speaking of buying all of it, at some point in your lolita career, you’ll cave and buy an entire putup of lace from cheeptrims.com. Accept that it will happen one day, and you’ll feel better when you eventually do. Today, however, fabric.com had what I needed in terms of lace.

Because I don’t know what colors my print is going to be until I have it in my hand, I will save buying the coordinating and contrasting fabrics until I’ve had it shipped to me. I’ll just get those at my local fabric store.

At this point, with shipping, I’m at about $55 ($57 with the pattern, since the Simplicity $2 pattern sale happens sometimes). I have a basic rule to add 20% to the cost of my original online purchase, because I will have forgotten something and have to buy it locally. This puts the dress cost at around $70 While you can absolutely find offbrand lolita dresses listed at $80, you usually cannot have them shipped to you for less than a total of $80. This amount should also give me enough extra fabric to make a hair accessory and maybe a purse.

But there you go, how to start out your first dress by actually referencing real lolita instead of trusting some Simplicity designer to have half a clue what she’s looking at.

Once I’ve recovered from spending a literal three hours on this post, I’ll do a shorter one about what kinds of fabrics are good for what dresses, kind of like that post where I said what dresses are good for what patterns.

[ejosdust]

ATEEZ is a big mafia orginization which was secretly founded and built by Kim Hongjoong 4 years ago. Hongjoong has personally selected some of the finest criminal individual for ATEEZ and things are going really well inside.

"Boss, i just finished the target. Clean and clear sir!"

The boy standing tall and straight, his brown hair got messy as he pulled out his mask. He looks so young and handsome, wearing a full black outfit. And on his back, he carried his precious sniper rifle, the one he just used to take someone's life.

"Well done Yunho! You have my compliment."

Hongjoong sat on his big arm chair, hand running down to his little dark blue braid as he leans back in pleased. Hongjoong was wearing a suit, dark blue to match his hair, the one with thin white stripes, and he has some touches of silver jewelry all over his neck and fingers. Next to him, the girl who flipping pages of documents, is his girlfriend Juniel. She is now wearing a tight short leather dress, crossing her legs, her hair was tied up and she is focusing intirely to the paper works in front of her.

"Ms.Juniel" - Yunho greeted politely but she just nod her head and draw a smile on her mouth as an answer, eyes still sticked into the documents on the table.

"You can go now." Hongjoong lower his voice as he stand up and start fixing his suit "Be prepare for the next mission, understood ?" his footsteps coming closer towards Yunho "My bad if my girl make you upset or something, she has always been like that when she concentrate, you know right ?" Hongjoong let out a chuckle as he found out he just pushed it out a little too much.

"It's a joke Yunho, you still need to learn to take jokes in a better way boy" Hongjoong pat lightly on Yunho back, a sigh of relief came from Yunho mouth. I was just thinking too much - he said that to himself and walk out the door.

"Tomorow i need you to go grab some weapons for me, babygirl." Hongjoong sat down next to Juniel, casually drop his hand on her shoulder and slowly move his finger-tips around in circular motions. "I have an important meeting with our new customer, so i can't personally go and grab those weapons-" Juniel stopped writting for a while and then lean her body into Hongjoong's chest, she smiled as she corrupted his words "I will do it for you baby, don't worry about me."

"To make sure you are unharmed, i had called San - a brother of mine, not techinically blood related, but he can be trusted to protect my baby." Hongjoong say softly and take out the hairband as his fingers intertwined to Juniel's hair. She then relax her body and lie down on his thighs, not forgeting to pull down her skirt. "I guess this is too short on you baby. Why do you keep wearing these type of clothes ? It's uncomfortable and-" She let down a small kiss on his lips to stop him from talking nonsense "Because i like to and i look good in these. That's why." She giggle as she stand up "Don't say that you don't like seeing me in these skin-tight dresses"

"I do. But i don't like you looking this exposed to people out there, babygirl" He groans as let out a sigh of unpleased. "Then protect me harder from all the hungry wolves out there baby." Juniel smirks as she run out the door of Hongjoong's office. She seems pleased with his powerless reaction.

Hongjoong is the boss, he has the mighty power to simply kill people as he pleased or when he feel like it, he won't even blink once. ATEEZ growing big is his long last desire, he will do anything to protect and build it up. His words are rules, you must obey, or else. But those rules don't quite apply to Juniel, as rules for her are meant to be broken. She had came through thick and thin with him, being his greatest supporter in his lowest point of life. Because of that, she can do whatever she wants without minding about his rules.

Hongjoong loves her a little too much, which might become his weakness someday.

---

"Enough right?" Juniel say, looking at a man who is counting a suit case of money across the room. Then she take one knee down to check the weapons she has just received.

"All good Mrs." The man laugh loudly as he continues "I hope we can meet and do bussiness with each other again in the future."

"Sure! We will meet again someday Mr.Park Seonghwa." Juniel smile and bow as he jump into his black van and drive out of the place.

Juniel then slowly walk down the hall toward the parking-lot with a huge bag of weapon on her hand, the sound of her heels echoing all around. "So he said the license plate of the car is 1024 and it's black with a--oh found it". The car's door suddenly open, walks out a handsome man in a black suit with embroided red line all over the neck part.

"Hello, im San, Choi San. You must be Juniel, Hongjoong asked me to catch you up here and drive you home." He smile and let his hand out for a handshake. "Yes, nice to meet you San." She smile back and give him a greeting handshake.

"Ah-you won't mind having another girl sitting with you right ?" San ask in concern. "If you make sure she won't cause any fuss in our bussiness then it'll be fine." Juniel say as she slowly get into the backseat of the car.

"Oh-Rachel? What are you doing here?" Surprised at the presence of her friend inside his car, she can't help but open her mouth. Rachel is wearing a neutral grey tone two-straps dress, which is long enough to cover her ankle, it has some sparkly strap tying around to define and show her beautiful waist line. Her hair is bundled up nicely, on her lap settling a bouquet of variety flowers. "Jun-? It's surprised to catch you here. San and I just went out for a date in that fine ass restaurant we used to go together lmao" Rachel reply and then burst out laughing of the coincidence.

"So is he a financier like you ?" Juniel ask in wonder "Yeah, this date is all set up by my mom and his mom." Rachel let out a sigh of disapointment. "But he is nice, and polite, so i guess he ain't that bad." she quietly whispered and then paused a little "But hey, you knew San ?"

"Nah, not really, he is a friend of Hongjoong, a close one as i know" Juniel reply, her hand crossed in front of her chest, she raised her eyebrow up a bit. "Oh that's so! He might be a badass, who know someone like Hongjoong and also be his close friend." Rachel compliment with a little chuckle, she made sure San hear it loud and clear in the front-row seat. His little secret is now exposed. Things will get fun between us - a thought slip out in Rachel's head.

--

"Baby im back with the weapons." Juniel kick the door in and made it slam on the wall real hard, she didn't seem to mind it even though Hongjoong startled because of the loud noise. "Shit-you scared me baby!" he said as he turned his head back and quickly glance at the bag on her hand. "I mean i can say Seonghwa is doing good right now, if you wanna know about your long old partner" she walk toward Hongjoong and then collapsed right next to him, head fall back on the couch as she un-tied her hair "these new heels are killing me tbh" Juniel munmur, try to kick the other heels off her red and swollen feet, the movements leaving her thighs exposed further up more than it should.

Hongjoong's hands suddenly fall on her thighs, she startled because of the cold touch out of nowhere. "Too short-" he said slowly as he raise his brow "Ah-about the weapons-" she quickly tried to pull her skirt down and avoid the non-stop conversation about she's wearing something too short to bear for his liking. His grips on her thighs getting tighter as she pull it down, interrupted her speaking, it might leave a mark there as she feel tingle on her skin. Hongjoong then grab her chin and hold it to place, keep her eyes lock to his, his glare are so intense yet lustful at the same time. He pull her close and their lips begin to mash against each other, his tongue swirl and explore her mouth, he make ways to dominance and rule her mouth as the tension inside her rise up like a tide.

Both of their breathe are turning shallow and shaky, some moans being let out inside their throat, they all try to catch some air as the kiss grow more in desire. She then broke out from the restrain of his mouth, slowly slide her tongue down his neck, he tilted his neck and smirk "You are always freaky like this babygirl" he grab a lock of her hair to secure his position and then lean back to make it easy for her to access his neck. "You like it ?" she don't really need an answer right now, say as she suck the sensitive skin on his neck, he squirm a little and a groan escape his mouth in pleasure. "I love leaving marks on you, you look so sexy sir." She smirked and grinned her teeth as she continue to create marks after marks.

His grip tighten around her scalp, the other hand squeeze her waist close to his as he lean down and whisper "Babygirl, i need you to be on top of me." The hot air brushing around her ear make her tremble and her face burning up. He can't wait any longer for his lover to move, he grab her ass in no time and then pin her on top of him. "This is your throne babygirl. My dick is your throne." Hongjoong impatiently push her hair to one side, leaving her beautiful soft neck and sexy collar bones exposed to his thirsty eyes. He roughly bit into her neck, suck it harshly like a hungry creature devouring its prey. She moans into his ear, back arched with the sensation run down her veins, hands grip tightly on to his short messy hair. Her body heating up, sweats begin to form on their face.

Those moans quickly turn into whimpers, that back arched turn into humping against his harden sex. Their hips rock to each other's rhythm, his lips still glued onto her neck as he 'create' his path around that slender neck and collarbone, dark purple and blue mark risen up one by one.

"Oh-" the door isn't locked, someone just knocked and walked it "Did i just interrupt something ?" Yunho voice suddenly sound so husky and awkward, not like his usual voice. All their action got caught up in Yunho's words "Why did you come here ?" Hongjoong asked him calmly as if there was no one in a tiny dress who spreading her legs on his lap and grinding right now. "Ah-i just want to confirm something about our next mission, boss." Yunho gaze down on the floor, trying to not make eye-contact with his boss - the one look like he just went out of a war (sex war).

"I'll call you to talk about it later. You can go now." Hongjong move his hand in a gesture that say 'go out', only waiting for that, Yunho bow and leave the place.

"Fuck you Hongjoong-you embarrassed me!" Juniel punch him in the chest then roll herself down from his lap. He reacted an awful 'ouch' like it's a funny thing to caught herself un-guarded like that. "That was fun right baby?" he grab her ass and smash it as she leaning down and putting her heels back on. "Ouch-stop that. imma fucking kill you Kim Hongjoong don't make me." she growl in pain and anger. He seems to enjoy the scene of his angry and embarrassed girlfriend, he let out a smile and giggle in his throat as he watch Juniel walk out the door. "Wait me at home babygirl" he shouted towards Juniel, don't even know if she could listen or not, but who cares anyway, he will meet her eventually.

--

Juniel was taking a shower while she heard the door being unlocked, Hongjoong has just arrived home. Drying her hair walking down the stairs, she found Hongjoong talking to Yunho and Yeosang - another one in the crew just like Yunho, but he specialize in investigating places and people. Juniel smile at them as a greeting.

"Joong, i gotta go out for some of my bussiness. I'll be home soon." she announced him, Hongjoong just nod his head in reponse and go back to the discusion about the upcoming mission. Realizing that, she quickly go upstairs, change her clothes as she dial Kay's number - a person who got kick out of the organiztion because of his betrayal action. Which is unlikely for a girlfriend of the boss to do something such as getting in touch with a betrayer.

"Hey, can we meet right now ? I got the weapon ready."

"Sure, meet me at Des. in 15 mins."

Juniel had never talked about her past relationships with Hongjoong, even though he almost begging her to share her past stories. She just found that wasn't nescessary to bother him with all of her dark past and toxic relationships. He got works to do, things to deal with, there isn't only 'her' in his life. So, there she go, trail down the same old path, keeping touch with her ex - not really ex, Kay's just a hookup buddy before she knew Hongjoong. But since Kay was sly, he got some tapes of her having intimate sex with him, recording it without her consent, which is a shame for her and even the organization if that was leaked.

"Jun, long time no see!" Kay stood up from his seat, open arms like he wanted a hug. "Hugging is not a part of our bussiness." Juniel denied as she saw his gesture and sat down on the barstool next to him, odering a Margarita like she always do. Then realizing somebody sitting next to him, she raised an eyebrow of concern toward that person. "Yes he is my partner, his name is T.U." Kay quickly response.

"Can we talk somewhere else, i don't think i can trust your new partner." She stood up as she whisper in Kay's ear, holding her drink. "Wait for me here T.U." T.U nod as Kay speak. Walking wearing a simple black body skirt and a two-straps velvet top might caught his devil eyes, as she feel his gaze starring on parts of her body. "So, let's get back to work, shall we?" she hum her throat to draw his attention, lean her back on the couch she just found in the corner "Sure," he paused and then sit down "Where did you store it now?" He talked as he sip his drink. "In the warehouse near my place. It is fully guarded from head to toes, you might not get through it without losing an eye or maybe your heart if things get worse." She smirked out "But i can help you, if you delete all those clips. Or i can't make sure anything." She tossed her drink on her hand, mixing the ingredients together before sip a bit.

His expression darken but he agreed on her suggestion. Maybe he just agreed for her trust? Afterall, she couldn't neglect all the possible outcomes, she has to repair for the worse. Suddenly, the phone rang, it's Hongjoong calling, Juniel turn her face sideways to take that phone call. "Baby, what are you calling me for?" She pouted as she answer "Do you want something to eat at night?" the voice on the phone reach her ears "Lemme think--fuck--" Out of nowhere, Kay jumped on her body, left her sentence interrupted. His hand crawling on her thigh, tugging her short skirt up, he is trying to get a way with her. A thought of making his way to rape Juniel came to his mind so suddenly, he found it quite interesting. So he did it for fun, to take control of her. Kay and Hongjoong has a feud since he kicked him out of the organization because he snug ATEEZ weapons out to sell for some other smaller groups.

"Where are you Jun ? Tell me now." the phone is still on hold, Hongjoong might just heard all the things. His voice sound cold like a rising storm, she can tell that he's so mad, that scenario bring shiver to her spine. Hearing that, Kay lean down to whisper to her ears "If you tell the truth, i will reveal to him that you're nothing but a betrayer like me." he chuckle under his breathe. "Ah-i am out with my friends," she forced a laughter out "I just s-slip because of the water someone spill on the floor so i swear a bit, there's nothing tho-" she mumble and then continue "I gotta go, it's loud here and my friends wanted me to join them at the dance. See ya at home baby!" She quickly hang up and drop the phone on the table, the position is still the same with Kay on top of her.

She stared at him in disgust then struggle herself out, he let her go since there's no one hearing it anymore. Then she stood up, checking her outfit while swearing in her throat. Kay standing there, smirk in pleased, crossing his arms in front of him, he thought it was fun while he can caused Juniel some type of troubles as her boyfriend did to him those past years.

Suddenly, Juniel felt a hard grab on her arm, she turned around to see San standing there gazing a cold harsh look into the situation. He stood there with Wooyoung - another member of ATEEZ. Look like they were here and see her with Kay from the start. Not even waiting for her to response, San raised an eyebrow then roughly pull her out of the place without saying anything. She struggle to break free but it's useless, he's too strong. Their pace slow down as they reach the parking lot. "Don't do anything to hurt Hongjoong, he loves you." Finished talking, he quickly jumped into his car and drive out of the place, without taking a glance at Juniel's expression.

--

Ever since that day, San and Wooyoung seem to notice and be aware of Juniel actions more and more. She still sometimes text Kay when she's around all of the guys, also around Hongjoong which irrated San a lot. Watching your best friend's girlfriend cheating and betraying him with somebody else but you can't do anything with it without causing some fuss. San stood there, trying to hold his will to literally throw some fire within those eyes, he clenches his fist hard in anger each time.

San's weird reaction in days has driven Hongjoong attention toward him, which one day ended up with himself holding the barrel of a loaded gun against San's temple. Hongjoong look up sharply, lean himself comfortably on the table behind him, hand holding the trigger and ready to pull anytime. "Don't.ever.touch.her." he grunt under his throat after a smirk. "Huh?-" San gives out a faint smile then take a quick glance of Hongjoong expressions. "Why do you suspect everyone but..i don't know? HER?" he raised a brow up, saying words in a lower tone than usual, hands constantly loosen his tie up. He doesn't even care one bit if Hongjoong is going to shoot him in the head or not, who even care if a stupid mafia boss getting his nose lead by some betrayer. Not him of course, Hongjoong better watch out, if he dies, game over, no one is going to tell him the truth. "Oh shit-" Yunho and Wooyoung who standing across the room, rapidly rush themself toward Hongjoong and San when they realized things are much more WORSE than it look.

"Maybe it's a misunderstood or something," Yunho quickly intterupted the conversation while trying to keep his boss from pulling the trigger "Yeah yeah, San's already has a fiánce." Wooyoung keep up the sentence, standing behind San in worried. "Rachel, her name is Rachel," "There would be no such thing as he liking Juniel, boss!" They all sound shaky in their voices, what if someone going to die ? They wouldn't know, so they gotta make sure no one goes over their limits today or blood will stain the place. Suddenly, they hear a dinstant crack cutting through the air, then the sound of shattered glass echoing loud and clear within the walls. Hongjoong just shot. A pop coming up like a short-distance fireworks, then after that is a sound of metal hit the ground, broken pieces of bullet spread unevenly everywhere. Everyone is shocked while looking at the direction of the noise, except Hongjoong. He slowly drop his gun on the table, then turn his face toward the door saying "I will always trust and forgive her, even though she did wrong things to me. Remember that." Finished the sentence, he walk out the door as if nothing has ever happened. Yunho and Wooyoung let out a breath in relief. "That was close.." Yunho hold his heart "I know right, shit was getting really intense." Wooyoung reply, hands patting Yunho's back. They both go out of the place shortly afterward, the only one left was San, standing there and looking into the void, thinking should he tell him the truth about her? After all those lives and deaths expreriences.

--

Not so long after, like only 2 hours after that, rumours begin to float around like garbage on the river. Juniel heard all the things about her man willing to kill his bestfriend because of her, about the fuss between her and Kay which caused San in trouble. He must have been killed if there weren't Yunho and Wooyoung there. She couldn't help but feel guilty and disgusted of her own self.

"Hey, it's Juniel, are you free for a drink? Like right now, i need someone to talk to." Juniel pick her phone up and dialing her friend Rachel, she can't bare staying home and thinking about her life decision anymore, she need to go out and talk to someone. Maybe Rachel could help. "Yeah, im quite free at the moment. I could meet you up Jun!" Rachel on the other line reply cheerfully. "Thanks god. I'll text you the address. See ya in like 30 mins?" "Okay, sure, see ya there" They hung up their phones, and preparing to go out.

"Rachel, have a seat then!" Juniel arrived at the place first, sitting herself comfortably at the counter of the bar. "Nice pub! A good place for drinking your sadness away lol." Compliment went out of Rachel mouth as she look at the designs and decorations inside, she didn't forget to make a joke and burst out laughing at the end of her sentence. "Your taste of things are still the same." Talking as Rachel glance at the glass of Margarita on Juniel hand. "Yeah, nothing has really change much since." Juniel sip one bit of her drink, squinting her eyes because of the strong taste of alcohol, then she continue "Strong one. That's why i love this place." "Other places use of alcohol suck, aren't they?" Rachel say as she sit down next to Juniel, hand pointing at a Mojito on the menu. "I'm not a big fan of strong drinks, so imma play it safe tho" She smile and continue "So, what is it all about? Why did you call me out of the blue?" Rachel cross her legs and draw all of her attention to Juniel.

So, not waiting any longer, Juniel started speaking about everything that happened right now, which were driving her insane. "You're afraid, but why did you do that anyway?" Rachel forcefully ask while looking straight at Juniel eyes. She avoid Rachel's look then lean down to sip her drink, clearing her throat "Kay has my secrets. I'm scared of him letting my secrets exposed to Hongjoong." The door suddenly creak a sound, which brings both of their attention toward it. "Oh fuck not again-" Juniel sighs in displeased looking at the people who walking in right now and then whisper "I completely forgot that this place has now under the control of Kay." Hearing it, Rachel clenches her teeth "Oh-speak of the devils, is he the one in white shirt?" "No, it's T.U. his new partner. He is the other guy in black."

They both trying to avoid Kay and T.U. by turning their back to the entrance, but things aren't going the way it should. The footsteps are coming closer and closer then a cold hand suddenly slip on Rachel waist, she startled and glance up for a man in white, trying to have his way with her. "Well look at that, a new girl in town." T.U. say provokingly, fingers on the other hand playing with her hair. Rachel annoyingly push his hand out of the way, she don't want anyone to touch her without her consent, especially a douchebag like him. T.U. hand quickly grab her chin up, hold it into place as he speak to her face "Be a good girl and pleased me for one night, or i will make sure you're not coming out of this place alive baby."

"Well," Juniel click her tongue "you could have sex with her or kill her, but after that, lemme tell ya, it's more dead than alive." She stand up watching the view, didn't forget to say a statement to his face. He probably won't want to see Rachel's fiánce got mad. No one want to. "Take it easy Jun, i wanna see T.U. have his way with your friend." Kay hold Juniel hand back, which is reaching out to push T.U. hand away from Rachel face, and give out a smirk. Juniel stare at Kay in disgusted while Rachel struggle her way out of T.U. hands. The pub getting heated up by the situation.

"Tsk, call Hongjoong!" Rachel keep her voice downn as she say, enough for for two people to hear, herself and Juniel. "I can't. If Hongjoong meet Kay, shits will turn into a disaster." Juniel whisper back. "How about i call...San?" Rachel nervously mention. "I won't really recommend that tho.." They exchange eye contact in fears. They fell in silence for a few minutes, those man eyes still lock on Juniel and Rachel. Then Juniel decided to go down and try to negotiate (thương lượng) to the mans about letting them go.

Suddenly, Rachel phone rang, it's San calling. She is too afraid to pick up her phone because she is being caught up inside a not-very-pleasant situation so she don't wanna bother San dealing with this, and maybe if she pick up, that guy named T.U. will start to annoy the shit out of him. Ting! a text message coming up from San, help pulling her out of her own thoughts, which said: "Pick up the phone! Don't let me find out where you are right now." While Rachel hesitated should she pick up or not, T.U. and his sly hands quickly steal her phone, he pick up right after. "Where are you?" - the cold icy voice coming out of the phone. "Oh, im having fun with these guys in the pub." T.U. answer and the other line hang up right away. T.U. burst out a laugh and give her phone back, while Rachel eyes widen with suprised, that thing happened so fast she can barely react.

About five minutes after, San and Hongjoong both show up at the door, bringing Yunho and Wooyoung to the place. They kicking the door in, three of them having guns on their hands, only San came in with nothing. Hongjoong started speaking in a serious tone, hands loading his gun. "So, tell me Jun, why did you want to steal the weapons for Kay?" He then receive no answer from her, Juniel has placed her eyes down the floor since she saw him walking in, trying to avoid eye-contact as much as possible. "Ah-because i have negotiated to sell those weapon to an oganization in America, but ATEEZ got it first. So i asked her to steal it for me." Kay reply in rejoice. "Sure. Yunho, take the weapons and give it to him." Hongjoong turn his head and give his command out for Yunho. "Yes sir."

"And Kay, after you have had your weapon, i don't wanna see you have things to do with Juniel ever again." Hongjoong grunt and look at Kay straight in the eyes. Those piercing gaze Hongjoong give out could possibly kill someone. "But, beside that, you don't know what had Juniel done with me." Kay seems unpleased with the situation being so easy for Hongjoong to handle, he thinks if he give all the weapons out things will end? Not so early my friend, challenges need to be made. He painted a faint smile on his lips as he walk closer to Hongjoong, provokingly speaking. A loud bang then appeared, too loud to hear clearly, then after that it sound as small as a whistle. It's a close range gunshot.

Looking down on the floor, Kay's lying there, no state of life remain. Blood spill all over the place, it stain the walls, brain and skull pieces flew all the way across the room. People yelling and screaming, finding their way out of the mess, someone has already passed out. And there standing Hongjoong, look lifeless as he just has been forced to finished the prey. Rachel has already stayed in San arms when that gun shot burst out, San is fast enough to guess the thing that will happened as he pulled Rachel in right on time.

Cold words coming out of Hongjoong mouth again "Even that, you don't have the right to insult Juniel." He then turn his back and walk out without looking back. Leaving Juniel standing there, not knowing what to do or how to feel, she just standing there like a statue. He's filled with anger and disapointment. Why did someone he loves so much betray him like that ? What should he do right now ? Will there be a way out of this mess ? He keep his head ruined with his thoughts spilling every way possible.

Watching Hongjoong leaving, San then make his way toward T.U., who is standing there in fear since his partner died in front of him. San grab his shirt up by both hands, angry voice growling under his throat. "What did you do to her ?" As he talk, his fists clench tighter and tighter like he wanted to lift T.U. up the ground and throw him dead in the corner. "Noth-ing. Just a litt-ttle teasing that is-s it sir." T.U. mumble as if he's scared of losing his own life like his partner here. If he didn't back down from it, he might get killed and oh god that doesn't sound good. A punch then come out of nowhere, landed on T.U. face, everyone in that pub can clearly hear the thump moving sound as San fist collide to the cheek bones area of T.U. After that, T.U. whole body collasped on the ground, blood leaking through the corner of his mouth, maybe San broke his nose too because that punch was hard as hell. "So, what do you say?" Saying as San drag T.U. face of the ground, making him look straight to his face. "I won't ever-r come around her again sir-r" San tilted his head and smile happily "Good then."

Then he drop T.U. back to place, eyes glancing at his bruised knuckles. "Why do i always have to do such things tsk." he said to himself as he stand up, put his hand slowly back into the pants pocket. "Sorry for letting you see this Rachel." then he bow down to apologized. "Ah-it's nothing San." Rachel reply, eyes looking other ways "Shall we go now ?" He reach his hand out, Rachel quickly understand his intention, she put her hand onto his then they walk out of the pub.

--

As they were walking, San forcefully ask "So, what did he do to you ? Did he touch you somewhere ?" "He touched me everywhere." Rachel make a pitty face as if its the truth. His holding hand suddenly loosen up, his breathe got faster and veins coming out of his neck as they going to pop out anytime "Wait for me as i come back and kill that guy." he growl under his breathe, words come after words filled with anger. "No-no, i was kidding-" Rachel say in nervous while trying to grab his arm and pull him back from causing more trouble "He just touched me at the waist and that's all." Her voice got smaller and smaller, after finished the sentence, her grab on his arm start to loosen up, she look at her feet, helplessly waiting for an angry San to grow out of him. "Fuck i caused trouble for myself." - she said that to herself as she felt San getting closer to her. "Come with me." San say as he pull her arm with force, push her into the backseat of the car.

"Uh-what-?!?" Rachel confusingly response as her back hit the leather seat of the car, her whole body lie weirdly in the backseat. Unluckily, 'waiting' is not in San dictionary, he rapidly narrowing the distance between him and her, his face now only an inch futher from her face, he then adjust his leg right in between her thighs as he lean closer. San hands are parallel outside of Rachel head, holding her into place while his leg sliding upward her skirt which made her skirt to roll up. "So, you said you've lied to me? For fun?" He smirk as he watch her thigh starting to rub against each other, her face lit up in rosy color, her hands trying to cover her 'nearly' exposed self. "I didn't mean to-San." Her voice somehow sound broken, which appear to San ear as a beautiful choir from the one he loves. "Really ?" He lower his head and whisper provokingly into her ear, which send shiver and goosebump through all of her body. She squint her eyes, try not to feel the thing which run in her veins right now.

He then put his hand sideways to her waist line, the coldness from his hand make her body jump a bit. "Now i know why he touch your waist first-" his slender fingers seize her waist then he continue "because it's exposed to his eyes." She bite her lower lips, trying not to let out any possible sound. His eyes then glance slowly from her head to her toes, she look so beautiful, like a dream come true, he want to save her picture right now in his mind and never let it fade away. Then he slowly kiss her lips, a kiss felt light like a feather, she kiss him back as a respone. Their tongue intertwined to each other, her hand crossed on his neck, pulling him closer. Take that as a yes, he begin to devour her lips like a starving animal which haven't eaten anything for days. His grip on her waist became tighter, their breathe rapidly become one, they let out moans and groan within their throat. They soon let each other out to catch some air, her face is getting hotter than ever, both of their heaving chest risen up and down desperately finding some oxygen in the narrow space.

His eyes then drop at her neck and collarbones which now covered with drops of sweat, make it shine so marviously in the faded and flickering lights. He then lean down, bite and leave some red marks on it. She give out a soft moan then quickly try to cover it with her hand. "Let me hear you." He remove her hand from her mouth and roughly pin it to the back as he undo his tie and use it to secure her hand on top, then tying the tie on the door handle. "If you don't like it, i could stop and untie you. But only when you say so." He started his movement down there, knee touching and circling around her already soaken part. She let out a moan, louder than before "Good girl." He praise her as he slowly move his hand down, fingertips touching her neck, her collarbone, her waist then her part. She couldn't stop shivering by his actions, his touches. He start putting his hand inside her panties and massage it in a circular motion gently as he watch her reaction. She squint her eyes together, biten her lips and turn her head sideways, soft moans still leak out of her mouth even though she try so hard to conceal them up. Putting a kiss on her forehead, he slide his index finger inside her, a suprised groan crawl out of her mouth, her body twitching and squirming while her pussy leaking more juice out. He begin to move slowly in and out, trying to make her experience more comfortable. He then put another finger in, stretching her out carefully as she try to struggle free from the restrain, sweats begin to form on her forehead, moans started to fall out uncontrollably. "You really sucking me in. Such a good slut for me." A passionate kiss is now formed on both of their lips, like the wave of desire come over and take both of them out of the land, they hungrily explore each other throat while their tongues dancing inside. His finger pace then become faster and deeper, he curl his fingers to find her g-spot and then he knew hit them perfectly when she try to struggle his fingers out of her with broken moans and shaken legs. "Fuck-you're so hot." he whisper on her ears, still keeping that pace of his fingers. "San-n-i can-t." She mumble as she squeeze his finger, her words barely formed into sentence. "I'm not done yet." His tongue travel around her exposed neck, licking and sucking its way around while his hand still doing its job so damn well. He then roll her top up, reveal her beautiful breast, his teeth biting her nipples, tongue swirling around in circle, sometime suck it hard to make her moan out. Her moans are music to his ears.

"S-an--im going to c-um." She tremble, legs twitching together, herself sucking and squeezing his finger like it wanna trap those inside her, eyes closing and mouth can't help but open wide as she reach her limits. He body temperature risen up like a volcano ready to explode, she squirming and let out broken moans once again. "Then cum for me like a slut you are." His words have pulled the trigger inside her, she let out all of her on his fingers. Heaving chest, shaken legs, blurry vision after she let it all out. "You taste good, as always." He say with a smirk as he suck his fingers in pleased. "Don't talk to me like that." She avoid eye-contact with him because he probally gonna tease her if he saw her blushing face. She then sign 'untie me' as she look at her hand and wiggle around. After untied her, he help her fixing herself and clothes up, also wiping all the filty things they just done a few minutes ago. "Now shall we head home princess?" he smile as he jump in front and take the wheel, not forget to check her up one last time. "Sure baby. I need to take a bath as soon as possible, this itchiness is now killing me thanks to you." She glance at him in anger. "Oops, my bad princess. I guess i could make it up to you by cleansing you up when we get home ? How about that ?" He chuckle as if he has just made a funny joke which embarrassed her. "Shut up and drive or i will kill you." She threaten him as the wheel rolling on the way.

--

Juniel finally arrived home after the whole incidence. Her mind is now drown in puzzled, in thoughts, in regrets and in apologizes. Walking in their shared bedroom looking as dead as ever, her eyes get caught up within Hongjoong gaze. His gaze was cold, cold as ice and in that moment, she can't remember how he normally were. How sparkly those eyes were only for her, how his smile curl up beautifully when she push the door and came in, how he shown his affection toward her,..it's now all blank.

Like a white torn paper. Blank and Ruined.

"Hongjoong, you can decide how you gonna take my life right now, im not gonna fight back or something like that." She stood at the door, looking at him straight but he's just narrow his eyes down, focusing on the laptop which was on his lap. "Get that thought aside." He look up, closing his laptop. "No one's going to die tonight. But in this mean time-" He toss his legs down, put his hand in his pocket and walk toward her. His eyes landed on her face and on her expression, he wonder what's going on in her beautiful yet mystery mind. Does she love him or is it just a game for two ? Will he win this or will her take that mighty tittle from him ? He won't know, nobody knows.

"-you have to make up your mind and answer this question: have you ever love me, or not." his figure stood tall in front of her, his voice turn strict and it sound as a command, the way his words always affect everybody but her. "This house, you can stay for as long as you need-" he paused and take a deep breathe, his eyes avoid her face, as if he's torn if these words get spoken out. "-But, if you decide that you're not in love with me anymore, you can simply go, and from that moment, we won't be involed within each other life anymore." he then let out a light pat on her head, his fingertips may want to linger longer on each strand of her soft dark hair but he couldn't, his hand fall down in a fist as he put his hand in the pocket and go out.

The words ruined her, as a dull knife get stab inside of her heart, the veins covered it were struggle to remain its beat as the knife dance itself around in circles to damage the already bruising wound. Blood start streaming out of holes inside her body, her guts get twisted, the pain is now too much to endure. She collapsed on the floor, water start to form inside the corner of her eyes, the world then turn blurry as if its drowning. "I've ruined every-damn-thing." she growl in desperated, her nails unconciously stratching the wooden floor making unbearable noise. Drop of warm tears landed on the ground, mix with the crimson color of her blood spilling through the tip of her fingers.

"Fuck-" Yunho ran up stairs as he hear strandled and broken noise. When did he have the key? "Are you okay?" He nervously pick her up on the ground, blood is still leaking and dropping on the floor along with her tears, which create a beautiful and wild picture of the kinda fuckup mixture. "Boss tell me to look after you when he's away but fuck- i don't think it can be this worse."

"Ah-it's fine, really." She blink her watery eyes then get herself back to reality, she is now sitting on her bed when Yunho kneel himself under it to dress her wounds. "Aish-" she squint her eyes because of the pain. "Is it hurt?" he stop his motions and look up to check her "Just tingling a bit." she paused "Thank you for coming." her eyes drop at her fingertips, slowly check out the sore from her movements. "It's a command from boss, i couldn't do any different." "Sure thing. You can leave now, i will take it from here." she toss her eyes out as a sign, he then stand up, bow before her and leave, not forget to say something on his way out "Please take care miss."

--

The night she spent without Hongjoong beside her was long, longer than expected. The flickering lights outside the building, the cold breeze came through the window, the breathy sound she made while laying in her bed, slow music playing in the background,..it all formed in a large empty space - their home - used to feel like home to be exact.

She lay there wide awake all night, watching the sky change it's apperance as time went by. From the color of enternal crimson, illuminated itself behind endless skyscraper, to the fresh rosy glow hidden itself behind those soft looking clouds. All of that turn out more than enough to calm the rising storm within her mind and her heart, maybe just for a short amount of time.

There were no sign of her boyfriend in the house, he would be always sitting at the kitchen table and wait for her to come down to have breakfast together. But today, he's nowhere to be seen, which break her heart a little bit. Trying not to think too much about his disappearance, she grabbed some left over stuffs in the fridge for somewhat called breakfast and sat herself down the table.

"Hey, it's me again, are you currently free ? i was going to grab you for some early coffee." she dialed her phone and called Rachel once again. "Ah-im sorry i can't go with you today, i have some kind of idk- sore in my body so, it won't be comfortable for me to go out." the voice sound like a whisper as someone just got woke up from her sleep "Oh- okay, take your time resting at home." She paused and took a deep breathe, "But-uhm-can i ask you something?" the words spilled out her mouth in hesitae. "Im listening." Rachel voice tone got lower, which is now feel like a serious bussiness.

"What can i do right now, like along with the whole incident nights ago, Hongjoong did ask me something and i am now torn different direction-" Juniel paused and let silence get a whole of it "I mean- Jun," Rachel voice glow up through the phone in a serious and comforting way "i know you regret what you've done toward him, and shit got worse because you try to hide things, but now it's your chance to make it up and be honest with him..He loves you as passionated as he could, that's why he is now hurting. Real bad wounds you've made lol." Rachel chuckle at the end of her sentence. She then put force into each words that went out of her mouth which stumbled into the other line "Learn from it." After those last words, Rachel hang up, the conversation get cut half-way.

A sign of that call get her mind back on track, she slide through her phone, wanting to call and check on her boyfriend but she texted him instead. 'Hongjoong, will you be home for dinner? I got something to tell you.' - A text was sent, Juniel don't want to bother him by calling and get herself in trouble after hearing his voice. Not so long after, she receive a reply.

'I'm out for bussiness, i will be back after 2 days and then we can talk. I guess you have your answer now right, so see you then.'

'Okay, then see ya! Take care.'

She drop her phone on her bed, burried her face down the piles of pillows. "2 days." she whisper to her ceiling "then its all or nothing."

--

Two days went by, standing in front of her is her dearest boyfriend - her boss - the leader of ATEEZ - Kim Hongjoong. He look a lot leaner than the last time she saw him. His jawline is looking way more sharpen than a knife and can easily cut through his thin layer of skin, his cheekbone raise higher than before which made his cheeks sink down. How did he become so slender in that short amount of time ?

"Have you had dinner yet ?" The weirdest sentence ever formed getting spoken from Hongjoong mouth. "What? What do you mean?" She startled by surprised, unconciously took a step back in worried. "I said, have you had dinner yet ?" He say that once again and look at her straight in the eyes as he raise one brow up. He look very concern and strange. "I have already but-" "Good. I've already had dinner on my way home. Go to sleep dear, it's late." He interrupt her sentence then took his turn to walk out the living room. "Wait-i do love you."

Her grip on his shirt force him back as he try to sneak away from a serious conversation she wanted to build since like 3 days ago. "I meant it, i love you Hongjoong."

"Yeah i know, that's why you're still here." he rub her head, his eyelids close slowly "Hear me and go to sleep first" he say as he walk away from hern leaving her disapointed. "But you know what babe,?" he suddenly stop and angle his head sideway "I can forgive you sweetheart, you and only you, but i can't forgive for the thing you've done to me that easily."

She then found her wrist being pulled with extreme force, his fingers wrap around it tightly as if it can leave marks. His movements were furious, she can barely stay in balance with her own foot. "I mean, you've been a bad girl." Her back touch harshly in the cold wall behind, his elbow land on both side of her head and a grunt came out, leaning himself closer to watch each of her expressions. "My bad. I'm sorry.." Her eyes stick to the ground as she speak "Look at me." His slender finger lift her chin up. Their eyes then collided, once look shuttered as it tried to hide it true feelings, once look heavy in sadness. "Things wouldn't have gone bad if i didn't accept the offer. I was scared- I.." She mumble in her throat, her voice get broken and her eyes get teary as she try to speak.

But in a split second, her cries get stuck between his lips, his kiss is so addicting yet painful to the touch. He slide his tongue inside her mouth angrily and wandering around like a lost child finally found his perfect home, he crazily bite her tongue and her lips until they both feel the taste of iron.

Red and sticky liquid spill of the corner of their mouth, which then turn out to become too painful to bear, she try to get away from the animal but he's too strong. Being a boss of a mafia organization has trained him to be powerful and fearless. She's been pinned into her place like a figure of animal hung on the wall as a reward, after an exhausting hunting session.

Can't move, can't scream.

She struggle in his restrain, crying and begging him to let go. But he didn't seem to care much about her reaction, he continue to devour her hungrily. "Bad girl need to learn how to behave." He then push her down on the bed, finally letting air to fill her heaving lungs once again. He brush the hair out of her face, take his time to admire the figure of his beloved one, who's covered in sweat, breathy sound and broken moans, before he fuck the life out of her. "Know that i love you." A kiss drop on her forehead, warning about the thing will happen after that. An angry session of sex maybe ? But she's too worn out to respond probally, just let out a light breathy moan as an answer. His intention today isn't pure. That's what she know.

--

Days after, things might have gone back to normal, nobody act weird as the days before anymore. But, they all have to (or try to) pretend that the incidence hasn't happened, beside that it's all good til the moment T.U walked in with a bunch of people carrying weapons.

"Long time no see boss." T.U carry a rifle on his shoulder, looking bossy as he rule the place. Hongjoong raise his head, cock a brow then calmly spin the pen in his hand "Why do you come here?" He ask stony. San's head turn backward as Hongjoong speak up to see who's standing at the door sound so fucking cockily. "Ah-you again?" San say as he turn back, slowly sip on his cup of tea.

"To keep it short," T.U smirk "I want ATEEZ. A whole army behind me won't take a no as an answer." He walk closer to Hongjoong's desk, dragging his rifle on the ground creating annoying sound. Wooyoung, Yunho and Yeosang then pull their gun out and take a step foward to protect their boss. Hongjoong lift a hand up as a sign for them to stand back from the arguement. "As a person who needs another country help, my bad if i offend you Yakuza, that's a bold statement for you to say oh boy." Hongjoong stand up and let out a smile, he push the chair out to create a space for him to walk out. The sound of his shoes touching the floor echoing the silent place. Yakuza is another big mafia organization, it's like ATEEZ but in Japan. Hongjoong expression didn't change a bit, maybe he let out a small smirk as how stupid T.U. is to mess with ATEEZ. San still sitting there, sitting and sipping his tea in peace, bother about nothing, even when the situation is getting in the nerve of people around here.

Hongjoong and T.U. now standing face to face with each other, the atmosphere is becoming more intense as time goes by. "Don't make me to fire any bullet. Which will mean war to everyone in here." T.U. voice raise up as a threat and he continue "Beside, look at the amount of people right here, my guys are way much more compare to yours." He make an action of brushing dirt on Hongjoong's shoulder and burst out laughing.

"You disgust me." Hongjoong push T.U. hand away from his shoulder and keep a straight face as he talk. He loosen his tie and put both of his hand in his pant pocket. T.U. startled as he think Hongjoong was going to pull out the gun, his hand movement shutter while he try to pull his rifle up for protection. "Relax. I won't shoot this soon." Hongjoong chuckle then turn his back and walk toward his desk, as he was walking, he felt a cold metal barrel reaching his head.

"Don't fucking test me." T.U. grunt in his throat, his finger got closer to the trigger. All of the ATEEZ member startled and point their gun in T.U. direction, Yakuza did the same thing to ATEEZ. Dead silence filled the room.

"Stay put. Im going to check things out there." Juniel whisper firmly as she slowly lower her body and crawl out to study the situation. Juniel and Rachel were making some kind of deserts in the kitchen while they heard metal sound smashing around and some strangers voice. "Is something wrong?" Rachel ask quietly, avoid creating loud noise. "As I observed, they're going to have a gun firing, soon." Juniel nervously say as she loaded her gun, put her hand on the trigger.

"There there," San turn around as he speak, he slowly put his cup down, the sound of it and the sound of his calmly voice draw everyone attention. He cross his legs, eyes piercing forward. "Don't be so impatient like that. Let's talk things through, shall we?" He sound exactly like a bussinessman dealing an offer to a customer, cautious and reliable. "What do you want to talk about, huh?" The gun now turn its head toward San "You wanna play with me right? Im not done with the last time you nearly hit me to death, Choi San." T.U. angrily put force into each of his words, finger still set into the trigger.

San suddenly burst out laughing, T.U. akwardly look at his reaction, his grip on the trigger then loosen a bit. That's the chance, Hongjoong quickly pull the gun out of its place in his belt and fire a shot. Waitting no more, a gun firing start as soon as the first bullet flew out of its barrel. "Shit-too soon Hongjoong." San swear as he try to find a place to hide under those bullet rain. Yunho quickly cover as he slide a gun toward San, took no time wondering, San grab the gun and loaded it as soon as possible and find his way to fire.

Hongjoong stand there, firing non-stop towards T.U., trying hard to hit him in his deadly part and finish him, but the unequal part of the individuals cause him lots of troubles. Wooyoung deadass seriously come to the gun battle with his shotgun and dagger for a close range fight. Yeosang hide behind the counter as he try to contact the others to come and give them a hand, sometimes look up and throw greenades toward the enemies and often terribly knock down some walls and funitures. Yunho stand beside Hongjoong as his right arm and kill anyone who stood in the way with his favorite uzi.

"Oh my god they're fighting do they?" Rachel ask in concern but don't expect an answer while the firing sound keep getting louder and sharper. "I need to keep you safe." Juniel say as her hand drop on Rachel's. "Don't worry." Not so long after Juniel ended her comforting sentence, a loud shout then appeared.

"BOSS!!" Yunho shout as Hongjoong fall down right beside him, Hongjoong then took his last effort to fire one last bullet towards T.U. The bullet spin itself around, swirling and cutting through thick air and smoky scene, land right on T.U. heart while he cockily watch Hongjoong fall. Not the right time to laugh i mean. T.U. collapsed not so long after, his heart stopped beating in that right moment.

Juniel quickly rush over to check Hongjoong out in the zone of falling bullets, not even afraid of herself getting killed. Fuck it her boyfriend has been shot and she couldn't do a thing about it. Wooyoung and Yeosang take the responsible of clearing the path which lead to Hongjoong place. They, included San, surrounded Hongjoong in circle, bullet spin out non-stop from outside trying to protect the inner circle.

"Fuck im running out of bullets"

"Me too"

"Shit-"

"What do we do now ?"

"Die. Duh."

"I have some spare knives if you want?"

"Give it to me and stop fucking around will ya?"

They argue as the Yakuza narrow their distance, ATEEZ bullets starting to weakly approach their enemies. "As my count, 1-2-3 GO!" San shout as a command, just wait for that, they all turn to different direction and throw blades, sliding the enemies neck open. But this plan can't hold for long. Knives vs Guns? Fucking kidding me.

Juniel has tried her best to covered the wounds but he's bleeding too much through the veins of his neck. She tried to put pressure on his blood shot neck by her shirt, tried to keep him concious, tried to save his life. But, nothing gonna change the fact that he's already dead minutes after all of her efforts. The wound was too deep, hit right through the main veins of his neck which caused blood boiling out like a freaking waterfall. Watching her man fall in front of her, slowly giving his life up but damn he's fucking not forgeting to smile and comfort her that things would be alright before he gone - afterall. His delicate hair strings stuck into his beautifully shaped face, his eyes closed shut, his smile still lingered on his lips. Fuck that shit, everything about him was so beautiful and yet, hurt as hell. She paint out a smile, slowly touch every corner of his face to memorize it, intertwined her hands to his as the body gone cold. A kiss drop on his forehead, she mumble those three words with a smile before standing up and put herself in the fight.

"Don't fucking fuck with me and my guys." Now the circle has one more person, the only person who has a fully loaded gun. Juniel start to fire her bullets, tears covered her eyes but the thing is, those tears won't stop her from killing. Anger grow in her eyes, burning flames and dead bodies. She has to get herself back together and killing is the right thing to do now. Aim restlessly at people and watch them fall down like a castle of cards facing the wind.

One by one. Dead.

Red vision. Darken eyes.

"Shit-" San just got shot on his chest as he swear, one hand put pressure on the wound. They're all hurted, one place or another. Not one man is safe and sound. Oh well except Rachel - she's hiding and turn more worry after she heard San swear of the pain, her fingertips collide to each other, her palm begin to sweat uncontrolably as she pray to herself everything would be fine.

Then suddenly a group of ATEEZ trainees come in, armored to their core, firing every enemies down. "Wow, so soon!" Yeosang drop down on the floor, provokingly say as he glare deathly at the leader of that group.

"Good job guys we fucking lost our boss" Yunho rub his messy hair while looking at Hongjoong body and sigh. "I will fucking kill you all after today." Wooyoung threaten, point of each of the individuals. Rachel has now came out to take care of San wound with an emergency kit on her hand. "Let me handle it, it might hurt a bit" Rachel say softly as she open San shirt and try to pull the pieces of bullet out by a twizzer. A tiny ouch leak out of San mouth, which Rachel find it cute and funny at the same time. Finished covering San wound to stop it from the infection, she then continue "First aid, then you all will go to the hospital." She then turn herself over and take care of others wounds carefully.

"Juniel, you got some slit in your arms and waist." She look up and find Juniel slowly close her eyes and shake her head as a no. After that, her figure dissapeared with Hongjoong body. "That might take a while." San sighs sadly, leaning himself back and try to move his chest up and down. "Keep an eye on her, please." Rachel speak up, almost sound like begging, her eyes filled with worry. "Sure, we will. Don't worry." Wooyoung answer quickly, gazing his eyes through all those dead bodies in front of him.

--

[crushedbyhyperbole]

Cleared for Duty - Chapter 3

Have you read chapter two?

Chap Summary:  After a chat with Steve, Bucky tortures himself over Edwards’ assessment.  A chance encounter and some eavesdropping gives Bucky some answers but there’s yet more misunderstanding. Will Bucky ever overcome his over self-loathing, and get a grip on himself?

Warnings:  There’s a lot of angst, self-loathing and emotional beratement on Bucky’s part.  Bucky is getting over his past traumas.

Shoe’s on the Other Foot

“You really hurt her, Buck.” Steve rested his elbows on his knees, leaning forward with a disappointed expression.

He’d come to my room for a beer and a chat about the possibility of me becoming a more active member of the team, but he’d quickly diverged from that topic onto a one I really didn’t want to entertain.

I sighed and shook my head. If I didn’t respond then it wasn’t a conversation.

Dr Edwards had walked out of the sparring suite on her own two feet, without assistance.  I know she had.  I checked the footage.

A large ball of guilt hung in my gut so I’d watched the recording just to torture myself some more. Yeah, I’d fucked up.  I knew it, Steve knew it, the whole compound knew it. Stark was furious, calling for me to be sent back to Wakanda.  Jokes of Manchurian Candidate aside, he probably wanted to put me back on ice. It wasn’t a bad idea, in fact it was a pretty good one.  Smart. The problem was, there was no helping me while I was under.  Steve wouldn’t allow it.

“Bucky?”

I looked up, glaring at my friend.  I hated that I put him in this position but also hated that he was laying a guilt trip like this on me.  Like I didn’t feel bad enough.

“Whatever it is between you two, you at least owe her an apology.”

He was right, I did. But that didn’t change the fact that seeing her was the last thing I wanted in the whole world right now.

“Have you seen the medical report?”

There was a medical report? Did I beat her that badly?

“Broken ribs, Bucky.” Steve sighed heavily before continuing. “Bruises all over her body.  She’s lucky you didn’t-.”

“Kill her?”  I snapped.  “She gave as good as she got, Steve.  I don’t have bruises to show for it but she was more than capable of defending herself.”

His frown was deep.

“I’ve seen the suit data, yeah, I know she put the hurt on you man, but she’s just a normal person, no serum, no powers, no nothing.”  He seemed to sympathise but it was short-lived.  “Her suit data on the other hand…”

“Just stop, okay.”  I leaned back against the chair and rubbed my hands down my face.  This was painful enough.  My own anguish plus the extra guilt Steve was laying on me.  “I know I fucked up.  I’m not saying it wasn’t my fault, but I can’t take it back, there’s no rewind on this shit.  It’s done.”

“You could say sorry.”

“What’s sorry gonna do, Steve?  She won’t accept it anyway, she hates me, more now than ever.”

“Just talk to her.” Steve stood, putting his unfinished beer on the occasional table.  This was him saying ‘apologise or else’, whatever the ‘or else’ would be.

After Steve left, I paced in my room.  I’d been hiding out in here for a couple of days after the assessments, not wanting to see anyone.  Steve had been my only visitor and I didn’t know whether that was because he’d told everyone to give me space or if they were too pissed off with me to bother checking in.  Either way, I’d worked myself up to a guilty crescendo only made worse by Steve dropping the broken ribs bombshell on me.

“FRIDAY?”

“How may I help you, Sergeant Barnes?”

“Are Monday’s combat assessment files sealed, or can I view them?”

“Yes to both.”

He could almost sense the amusement in her disembodied voice.  Curse Tony for making these A.I. things too human.

“Explain.”

“The files are sealed but as an active member of the assessment team, Sergeant Barnes, you have full access to all data, footage and results from the non-enhanced team assessments.”

“What about medical?”

“That is included in the data, sir.”

Had Steve known I’d look into it after he’d told me what I’d done to her?  Or had he forgot that I had been given access?

“FRIDAY, show me the files from my session with Dr Edwards.”

“Preparing…”  She said before light from above beamed a virtual display right in front of me.

It was all there; video, audio, suit data, energy outputs, efficiency readings, contact stats, medical, assessment result, recommendations for any further action.  I swiped at the medical file, though maybe I should have worked my way up to it.

The report was easy enough to read, two broken ribs on her left side.  I’d done that with my own flesh and bone, not the prosthetic.  Extensive bruising over 70% of her body, no concussion, no contusion.  There were pictures.  Stills taken from the examination immediately after and also from the days after.

My chest ached, seeing what I’d done.  No amount of dislike for a person should have made me lash out like that.  Yeah, sure there were bound to be some bruises.  These people were fighting enhanced avengers, we packed a punch.  But this…

The bruises on her forearms were from blocking my attacks, some of the ones on her legs also, shins in particular.  But her thighs, hips, stomach, ribs, and back were a contiguous blanket of mottled deep purple and bright blue bruises.  One bruise even had enough detail to see the ridges where the articulation of my metal hand had bit into her skin.  I hadn’t struck her face, however.

Feeling sick, I stumbled back, waving away the display.  My room fell into gloominess without the bright images.  Was I good for nothing but destruction, bringing hurt?

I had all but forgotten how she had pushed my buttons, making me angry as we fought.  Now it surfaced again, prickling my scalp with annoyance.  Why would she do this?  Push me into hurting her?  Why didn’t I stop?  Why didn’t I just let Steve switch her with Maria, then this would never have happened. All very good questions that didn’t mean a damn thing because I couldn’t take it back.

Goddamn you!  You broken, fucked up piece of shit.  You can’t escape what you were made for, never could, never will.

It was another couple of days before I ventured out of my room.  The necessity of food drawing me to the communal kitchen.  I had missed the weekly grocery order and the supplies in the fridge in my room had dwindled to nothing but condiments.

I waited until it was late in the evening, when I thought all the staff would have left and everyone else would have retired to their rooms.

I had just pushed the door to the communal area open when I heard voices.  It was Wanda and Dr Edwards.

My heart plummeted into my gut, stopping me in my tracks with the door cracked open no more than a couple of inches.  I was about to leave when I heard my name mentioned.

Out of their direct line of sight but able to see them reflected in the glossy black backsplash of the sink panel, I eavesdropped like a teenager.

“Why are you even asking about him, Vee?  After what he did?”  Wanda took a sip from a large white mug.  She liked tea.

“It wasn’t his fault.”

Edwards was leaning against the counter, uncharacteristically wearing trousers and a sweater in place of her usual skirt and blouse.  Maybe she was here socially.

“Hmph.”  Wanda frowned.  “Don’t make excuses for him, he’s a big boy and can deal with his own consequences.”

“I only asked if you’d seen him.  That’s all. Professional curiosity.”

“The fact that he stormed out of the assessment in the ‘murder strut’ has got nothing to do with it?”

I could hear the teasing in Wanda’s voice.  Wait! Murder strut?  What the hell?

Dr Edwards was silent but she looked down as if hiding her expression.

“Wow, really?”

“Can we talk about something else now?  You’re clearly not going to tell me what I want to know so let’s move on.”

“What did you want to know?” Wanda put her cup down on the counter and crossed her arms, suddenly invested.

“Just that he’s doing ok.” Dr Edwards huffed a breath through her nose.  “I really pushed him and I shouldn’t have.”

“Why did you, then. You know he’s volatile.”

“I don’t know.  I guess I just wanted to show him that not everyone is afraid of him, that I’m here and I’m indomitable.”  Veronica sighed then, defeated.  “Ever since I was put on his detail, back when he first arrived, I’ve been trying to help him through, well everything.  Yeah part of it is orders but there’s a part that’s not. I thought we had a connection but he really hates me for some reason, I have no clue why.”

Funny way of helping. I thought bitterly as I continued to listen in.

“He told Steve that you’re the only person who won’t ever call him Bucky.”  Wanda laughed softly as if it was some cute story.

“Really?”  That was genuine surprise.  “It’s funny you say that actually.  When we first met, he used to call me ‘Ronny’.  It was a name my parents called me when I was a kid, and I kind of liked hearing it again.  Then he started calling me Dr Edwards, in that stiff tone he always does, and I thought he was flirting.”

They both laughed.

“Bucky doesn’t flirt.”

“He does.”

“No he doesn’t.  He’s the type to bash his woman on the head with a club and drag her off to his cave.”  Wanda chortled.  “Anyway, you were saying?”

Dr Edwards, paused a moment to take a big drink from her glass.

“Okay, yeah.  I thought he was flirting.  I won’t lie, I did it back.  I figured it was a prompt, that he liked being called by his title, maybe it was a bit of tension charged camaraderie.  But it wasn’t.”  She shifted. “I didn’t realise how badly he was still damaged, you know, inside.  What I’d thought was a connection was a complete misread.  He closed himself off and made it perfectly clear that he didn’t appreciate my company, and now here we are.”

I felt like I’d been socked in the chest again.  There it was, confirmation that I was the cause of this whole situation.  Me, a broken thing, breaking other things around it.

“You know that’s all bravado though, right?”

“Is it?”

“Of course.”  Wanda laid her hand gently on Edwards’ shoulder. “He’s working through some, uh, things.  Maybe you should try to talk to him.”

“I can’t.  I tried after the arm protocol debacle but as soon as I walk into a room he ghosts.  Gone before I can draw a breath.”

She seemed sad, full of regret maybe.  I knew what that felt like but to me she always looked full of resolve.  When she would stare me down, hold my gaze until I became uncomfortable, there was nothing there but cold regard.  Could she be lying to Wanda right now?  Surely playing the victim would suit her cause better than admitting any fault.

“Can we talk about something else?  This is fucking depressing.”

“Sure, sure.”  Wanda said absently.  “So how did you learn to fight like that?”

Edwards laughed.  It was unexpected and a little bitter.  If I could have seen her face, I knew her smile wouldn’t have reached her eyes.

“You don’t quit do you?”

“Have you only just learned that about me?”  Wanda chuckled.

“I suppose not.” Edwards said wistfully.  “It’s not really a long story so much as it is a strange one.  I’ve done martial arts since I was a kid actually, it’s an unusual style adapted from kung-fu and jeet kune do.  When I was recruited by the CIA as a tech officer, they put me through special ops training.  Undercover work, infiltrating labs is harder than infiltrating governments apparently. Something to do with knowledge and expertise.”

“So you were a nerd version of Romanoff?”  Wanda interrupted.

“Oh, god no!  I was nowhere near her calibre.  She’s a legend.”  Edwards drank.  “Anyway, I was headhunted by SHIELD so I took the job.  Obviously SHIELD wasn’t what we all thought it was so that got me transferred to STARK Industries.”

This was all very interesting but I was getting impatient, wanting to hear how she’d managed to kick my ass.  She said that she was nothing in comparison to Natasha, yet Nat had never bested me the way Edwards had, even when she was fighting for her life back in Washington DC a few years back, when I was him.

Wanda seemed to share my sentiment.

“But that doesn’t explain how you took him down.  Not even Romanoff can do that.”

“It’s really quite simple.” She sighed, saddened further by the memory of their fight.  “I learned him.”

Say what?

“I mean, really learned him.”  Edwards took Wanda’s confusion as a queue.  “When I was put on his recovery detail, I learned everything there was to know about that man.  Who he was before, back in the forties.  The war. His Hydra history.  The arm.  Every mission.  Every kill. His abilities, strength, speed. His style and all of his weaknesses. Even his psychological reports. It’s always best practice to know the terrain, right?  How effective would I be if I didn’t understand him?”

So you were just another experiment to her?

“The only thing I don’t know about him is how he feels.”

The restless simmering of anger burning in my chest increased until I was practically twitching. This made things so much worse. The cold way in which she’d picked out all my flaws in order to exploit them?  Jesus what a piece of work.

“I fought like I did because I know him, down to every scar on his body.  Every, single, one, Wanda.  That’s how much I wanted to put into his recovery.”  She swiped at her face and coughed nervously.

I was already letting the door swing closed, striding down the hall in what Wanda had aptly called my ‘murder strut’.  I didn’t care that the door clunked against the frame after I let it swing shut unhindered. I didn’t care if either of them knew I had heard.  I was done with this shit now.  Steve needed to either send me on mission so I could go hurt some assholes or let me go so I could get away from this place and her.

I supposed this was how she had felt, hearing me and Steve talking about her a few weeks ago.  I couldn’t care enough to feel guilty about it then, and now it felt justified.  Hearing her say she studied me, learned my weaknesses, learned the terrain.  For what?  Manipulation?  Had she resorted to this emotional conflict to try to control me, in place of her failed attempt at friendship early on?  Perhaps it had been pity that had made her try the connection route first. And what for?  To keep me under control?  Hell, I’d rather be put on ice again.

Fuck it!  It’s not worth the stress.

Then why does it hurt?

The slight cracking of her voice as she told Wanda the final piece of her story.  The hasty swipe of fingers against her cheek.  Was she regretting starting this war with me? Had I hurt her more than she was letting on?  Something other than the physical.

Undoubtedly the latter played a part.  She took a beating from me with barely a perceived reaction.  I knew at what point I’d broken her ribs, however, it was the first body blow I got in on her.  And she’d continued to fight afterwards.  That took some control.  Could I hate her and admire her at the same time?

The images of her bruised skin flitted through my mind as I strode up to Steve’s door.  I knocked twice and FRIDAY let me in.  Steve was sat at his desk signing reports.

“I want out.”  I said, not bothering to greet him.

He turned to me and considered me for a moment before signing one final page and closing up the manila folder.

“Care to tell me why?”

“Edwards.”  I said.  “I’m done.”

“You spoke?”

I shook my head, clenching my jaw.

“Then what?”

He laid a hand on my shoulder; a friendly gesture despite my formal stance.  I hadn’t realised I’d stood to attention, army training never too far under the surface.

“I can’t help you if you don’t talk.  Was it what I said earlier?”

“I saw the files.  I can’t be trusted.”

Keeping my answers short was the best way to keep the emotion out of my voice.  I didn’t want to admit it to myself but I was floundering in the shallows of my own mental anguish with the deep water not too far away. Her bruises bringing back memories from a cold place in my mind.  The ice cold feeling was firmly rooted in my soul despite the therapy.  The words were ineffective now but that didn’t matter because The Winter Soldier was always in there, he was me and I was him.  We could only destroy.  If I stayed here the split that had formed in The Avengers over the Sokovia Accords would only grow wider.  I had to go.

“Buck,” he began but I scrunched my face up, not wanting to hear him beg me to stay.  “I don’t want to force the issue but the only reason you’re not in a cell on The Raft right now is because Tony and I took responsibility for you.  You can’t just leave the compound and go live on your own until the government signs off on your rehabilitation.”

“And they wont.”  I murmured, half to myself.  I knew that’s what he’d say.  I could tell him I’d just escape and disappear.  I’d done it before, spent months and months in hiding until Zola framed me for the U.N. bombing.

“No, they wont.”  He sighed.  “Look, you’re not a prisoner here but there are protocols to follow, hence why you’ve always got a buddy or a shadow when you go out.”

I knew that and I accepted it.  I’d never tried to shake them before but if I wanted to vanish there’d be nothing they could do to stop me.

“I’m just hurting right now Steve, I can’t be here.”  I said, hoping he’d understand because I sure as hell didn’t.  “I saw her in the kitchen with Wanda.  They were talking about me.”

Steve raised a sarcastic eyebrow.  Yeah, I knew he was thinking I deserved that for doing exactly the same thing to her. I nudged him with my elbow, my way of saying ‘jerk’.

“I learned a few things, like how she studied me to get the better of me.  She must really hate me, Steve.  Did I kill someone she loved, maybe one of the ones I don’t remember?”

This rollercoaster of feelings was draining my energy faster than a pack of tranq darts.

“She doesn’t hate you Bucky.”

“You’re wrong.”

“Trust me, will you?” Steve said, almost rolling his eyes. “Just talk to her, okay?”

I nodded.  Accepting the fact that he was right.  I did need to have this out with Dr Edwards but I couldn’t bring myself to approach her.  That underlying feeling of unease I got when I was around her was enough to make me stay away, let alone the guilt from my most recent fuck up.

Over the years I’d killed a lot of people.  You’d think that the weight of all of that would completely outweigh this new feeling of helplessness that was threatening to smother me.  No such luck.  At least the PTSD was a known quantity.

“At least book in to see Rodriguez tomorrow, get a few things off your chest.”  Steve had this concerned look on his face that told me I’d zoned out for longer than I thought.  “It might help you get your feelings straight.”

“I don’t want to see the shrink.”  I needed less emotion, not to find more.  I had so much of it right now I was slipping under the surface, close to drowning.

“That wasn’t a request, soldier.”

Figures.

FIN

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