#also there's this one part of the fic where i remember i wanted to add something else but i forgot exactly what. and that's bugging me

[fearandhatred]

I HAVE FINALLY. finished the first chapter of my fic. now just to decide whether or not to publish it

[despressoslatte]

not the zoey you wanted (four)

pairing: zach maclaren x female reader!

summary: you waited all weekend for your boyfriend, Zach, to call or text, anything, to explain why he had just went and ghosted you when you were supposed to go with him on a family ski trip to meet his parents, his sister Avery, and his cousin, Miles.

content warnings: angst; victims of catfishing; miscommunication trope

a/n: a big big BIG thank you to everyone who has been enjoying this fic! I love seeing everyone’s comments and inbox messages dissecting the story and making predictions! I wrote for OBX back in 2020 when the show first came out under a different blog (in case anyone here remembers a blog called jjmaybankx, HI! Though that’s just a generic username, it might be hard to remember that specific iteration ahaha), but i had just created this blog the same day i put out this fic… and i am in awe of how well received and how much you guys are actually invested in this little world i have conjured up whilst dreaming of bf!drew. I am very honored <3

Masterlist | < part three | add yourself to the taglist

ᯓ⟢

How you were supposed to just get up and go to your afternoon classes after what had just happened was beyond you, but you had an important peer workshop in one of your writing courses and then straight to the tutoring center for you. 

Day one was hard, as you navigated the complexities of whatever the hell had just happened. You were angry: angry at the car for hitting Zach, angry that he had even for a second thought that Zoey Miller had been you, angry that she let him think that knowing it was wrong, angry that she did any of what she did at all. And most of all, angry that you were even angry with Zach for it.

Tuesday rolled around and you had to go to the class you had with Zoey Miller, with anger seething in your veins but the inability to cause a scene. You hadn’t told anyone, not even your roommate Bree, what had happened. You felt like if you made a big deal and spoke about it, then you would likely never get over it. 

You felt her eyes on you as you typed your notes during the lecture, having sat a few rows and seats to the left in front of you. Could she like… not? Face forward and pay attention to the class, stop staring at the girl whose boyfriend you tried to steal after trying to steal his cousin, thanks. 

Your next shift at the tutoring center was on Wednesday. Instead of having assigned tutees for the day, you had a five hour shift in the tutoring center where you mainly did your own homework, helped student athletes figure out why the printers wanted to act up and not print their assignments, and help the few random people who would come up to the reception desk to ask you for help on a writing assignment or to proofread their essays.

You paused as you set your coffee up and laptop down on the desk, looking across the tutoring center to see Zach hunched over his own computer in one of the middle tables, typing away. He was one of the few athletes who wasn’t assigned to mandatory study hall hours after he had gotten his grade up, thanks to your one-on-one tutoring sessions and then, once his girlfriend, study dates together in his dorm or yours. He normally wouldn’t be caught dead in the tutoring center if he wasn’t required to be there, preferring to do his homework on his own anyways.

But there he was, regardless. 

A week passed and Zach didn’t try to talk to you at all, just like you had asked. You also never saw him walking around with Zoey Miller, a recurring minor nightmare you kept on having. Thank God, you thought every time you’d see one of them around campus without the other. Zoey Miller came to class looking miserable every time, and each time you worked a shift at the tutoring center, whether it be study hall monitoring or a few hours of one-on-one tutoring, Zach was there, during his homework by himself at one of the tables. 

“Hey.”

You looked up from the book you were engrossed in, taking off one airpods to see Zach in front of you, his laptop in his arms.

“Zach…” you sighed softly.

“I’m not here to bother you, I swear,” he reassured you, sliding his laptop to face you. “I just… actually need your help with this one, promise.”

You looked down at his screen to see an essay typed out. You glance up at him again.

“It’s a big part of my grade, so I was wondering if you could proofread it,” he said sheepishly, putting his hands in his pockets.

You exhale and nod, motioning with your head to the seat next to yours. A smile beamed across his face, and he rounded the desk to sit down next to you, both of you half facing each other as he watched you go over his essay in suggesting mode, making comments and edit recommendations. 

“I like the color you painted your nails,” he said softly.

“Zach,” you warned.

He shut up.

You got to page five of the essay, having only had to make a few small grammatical suggestions, a small smile building on your face for how well written the essay had been. When he wanted to apply himself, and knew how to, Zach would always be extremely smart. Sometimes, when it came to subjects he didn’t quite care for, he just didn’t care to put in the effort. But he was very smart, he had to be a student athlete. 

Plus, you knew he had little moments of crises when he thought about his future. He didn’t think he’d make it pro, but he also wasn’t passionate for other things the way he was for soccer. He felt aimless sometimes. The ironic part of it all was that he chose English Literature as his major, the classes he struggled with the most and hence how you two met.

You had given him the idea before that if he really didn’t think he could go pro, he could keep playing soccer or being involved with it through coaching at high schools or even middle schools. But you also always told him that you thought he had it in him to go pro. He was the school’s soccer star, you weren’t sure why he always sold himself short.

“You okay?” his voice pulled you out of your thoughts.

You had been stuck on page five for longer than it would have taken to read the page over twice, Zach just sitting there in anticipation of what you thought he needed to fix before he looked over at your face and noticed you were zoned out.

“Yeah, yeah,” you shook yourself out of it, continuing to scroll down through his essay.

Another excruciating fifteen minutes until you were finished reading over every line intricately and leaving any commentary needed, you slid the laptop back closer to Zach.

“Just those edits, and it’s all good,” you told him, trying to avoid looking at him.

He tapped the desk, nodding. “Thanks,” he said, and you pursed your lips and nodded.

You bit your lip to try and prevent yourself from asking the question that has been hot on your mind, but the words vomit out before you can stop it, “How come you’ve been doing your homework here?”

You finally look into his striking blue eyes, seeing them widen before his cheeks turned a light shade of pink.

“It’s the student athlete tutoring center,” he pointed out, then pointed at himself. “Student athlete.”

You titled your head to the side, giving him “the look” as you said, “Zach…”

“Fine, fine,” he sighed with a small laugh, closing his laptop closed. “It’s the only time I ever get to see you, okay?”

You had an inkling feeling that was it, and you just nod in response.

“I can stop if seeing me bothers you,” he whispered.

“Seeing you would never bother me,” you said back.

The hopeful smile that erupted on his face made your heart sting.

The moment you two were having was interrupted when another student athlete walked up, asking for help since the printers weren’t working. You offered Zach a small smile, and he gave you a wave, before you got up to go to the opposite side of the tutoring center to figure out the printer.

ᯓ⟢

On your way to class the next day, you paused in front of the class you had with Zoey to see she was standing a little bit to the side of the pathway talking to Zach. You slowed your steps down a bit as you stared at them. You couldn’t see his face, but you could tell from the back of his head, jacket, and backpack that it was him.

That same guilty look was on Zoey’s face, and she was shaking her head. 

You could tell from Zach’s body language that he was upset, the way his shoulders lifted and his arms moved about as he talked, the way he did when he was trying to drive a point. 

You didn’t feel like watching them talk, putting your head down and heading into the building to go to class.

ᯓ⟢

“So, she broke up with you?” Zoey asked as she stood there staring up at Zach. She had asked him if they could talk when she saw him walking by on her way to class, and with an irritated huff, he agreed.

“She did not break up with me,” Zach said back sternly, shoving his hands into his pocket, kicking a rock on the floor. “She is just taking time to�� process… what happened between you and I on the ski trip…”

“I didn’t mean for any of that stuff to happen… I—”

“I don’t really care what you meant to have happened,” Zach said back with a shrug. “You knew you weren’t my girlfriend, pretended to be anyways, and now she won’t talk to me.”

“Well, I don’t get why she’s upset with you when I’m to blame,” Zoey quipped back, earning a look from Zach.

“Don’t,” he shook his head at her. “Don’t try to make her out to be the bad guy here.”

“I’m not,” Zoey shook her head. “I’m just saying—”

“I don’t care what you’re saying, Zoey…” he sighed. He wiped his face with the palm of his hands and huffed frustratedly. “Look. It’s just a lot for her. First, she thought I ghosted her all weekend. Then, it looks to her like I had cheated on her, and then when she found out the truth, she hears that I was starting to feel things for you, and—”

“You were starting to feel things for me?”

He gave her an irritated glare when that was all she had heard from that.

“I love Y/N, okay?” he said to her sternly, using his hands to point to himself and then off to the side for emphasis. “Not you, not anyone else, just Y/N. Whatever fake relationship you and I had when I didn’t have my memories, that’s all it was, fake. You are not the Zoey I wanted.”

Zach looked away from her, and that was when he saw the back of your head, face pointed to the floor, as you sped-walked away into the building. He couldn’t tell if you had seen him and Zoey talking, but from the way you were walking so damn fast, maybe. Damn it. 

He turned back to Zoey, who had tears in her eyes. And he felt bad, because he didn’t enjoy making girls cry.

“Just…” for the umpteenth time, he sighed. “Just stay away from me and my girlfriend, I’m begging you.”

ᯓ⟢

part five>

taglist: @faephoria @maybankslover @ursogorgeous13 @khiatonsx @enchantedstarfish @starsmoonn @zulema222 @10ava01 @ietss @rafegf-real @leather-n-velvet t @avengersgirllorianna @chalahyung01 @thaissette @emberaurora @isabellaxlilah @matchieee @purplerose291 @wtfdudesblog @mattyskies @onlyrealjoy @sabrina6272827 @probablyreadingsmutlol @loupiotesworld @tqd4455 @persefone200 @dreamygirli3 @tobucina @h1ghw4y-blog @k-k0129 @harrys-housewife @pillowprincess4him

hoping all of these tags worked, some of them weren't popping up when i typed them! i've retyped them all by hand like 3 times, but each time i save it, it comes up as half of the list not actually tagged, so pls let me know if it tagged you!

[deeplyshalllow]

Classic Fiyeraba fic recommendations

So, with the new movie coming out, I've seen a lot of requests here for people to write Fiyeraba particularly happy Shiz era stuff, and like guys, guys, I did not spend my formative teen years in the Wicked fanfiction.net section for people to act like the amazing fics there don't even exist.

So here is my list of the fics and authors so great that I remember it over a decade later

Obviously, given we have never had a situation before where people know act 1 but not act 2, there will be spoilers and act 2 stuff in a bunch of these, but please check them out.

(a few of the authors I know are still around tumblr I've tagged, but feel free to tell me if you want me to take it off).

Authors in no particular order:

Tiggy the Hopeless Romantic - Honestly just read anything this woman wrote, I think if anyone said Fiyeraba fanfic this would be the first name I think of - bonus that a lot of the stuff is easily digestible fluffy oneshots

Merina Thropp @merinathropp on Tumblr - Writes beautifully, I remember getting very excited when she uploaded new fic. I particularly remember her Fiyero's Shiz era twitter fic and her extended As Long As You're Mine fic

HC247 @a-partofthenarrative on Tumblr - Writes such lovely fluff and I think double digits on alaym fics! Particularly remember her Once Upon a Kiss series and Masquerade. She mostly writes POTO stuff now but I see occasionally get an alert in my inbox from her.

alinaandalion - another fantastic Fiyeraba writer (god there are so many) I particularly remember her for her A Drop in the Bucket series, which are a lovely series of Fiyeraba oneshots.

CrazyBeagle - one of the people on the Wicked section who has made the transition to real life friend. But I knew her for her fics before we became friends. To Feel is post musical fic which is a lovely realistic continuation of Fiyeraba's journey. Unlimited is a modern retelling of Wicked which I really enjoy though I have been told multiple times it will never be updated no matter how much I threaten.

Scandalacious Intentions @scandalaciousintentions on Tumblr - Candy is the other Wicked friend who has become an irl friend (and I am most certainly the only person who still calls her Candy). She is much better known for her Tonks/Lupin stuff, but I always loved what she wrote for Wicked. Witchy Woman was her first Wicked fic I still very much enjoy it.

Girlscout4ever wrote ever so beautifully. Cheap Rented Room is such a fantastic expanded ALAYM.

ElphabaROCKS - wrote a lot of very good Fiyeraba fluff

Vinkanwildflowerqueen @vinkunwildflowerqueen on Tumblr - I imagine a lot of you know her already as she is still writing! She writes a lot of very good Fiyeraba au fics

Fermantoso - one of the funniest writers in the section! Chasing Elphie is the one I remember best, au but funny and sweet.

Danderson - slightly more bookverse than a lot of the other writers here but still great fics!

Kaylle - There are Nights, is always the one people (including me) remember as it's one of the most beautiful pieces of fanfiction on the Wicked section, but all of her work is lovely.

Lost Ozian - Well known for her humour, The Fiyero User Manual springs immediately to mind, my favourite is actually her serious au fic Different

Me - debated whether to add this, but I was also part of the section back in the day, and I know people enjoyed my fics too, though God knows I've improve my writing in the last decade and a half - in terms of Fiyeraba my strongest were probably A Moment and Living. Perfect Together is unquestionably the best fic I wrote for Wicked, although it's more Flinda.

Individual Fics:

Like a Swan on a Lake - this fic was actually well after my time but I happened to read it and I love love love it! AU of Fiyero if both girls defied gravity together and it does such a good job of showing his intelligence

Broccoli - I remember this one being very sweet Shiz era Fiyeraba

According to Plan - funny fic, fun twist ending

Sincerely, an annoyed Shiz student - not strickly Fiyeraba but you should read it. It is a very fun parody.

It's a long way to fall - This was actually the fic I created a fanfic account for, because I hadn't realised you could anonymous review! A fun arranged marriage AU

Please, please add to this list if you have other recs, mine are about 10 years out of date. Also apologies if I've missed any out as there's so many good ones and it is 2am.

[1-800-kami]

R U MINE? feat gojo satoru (II)

gojo satoru has got to be the picture definition of a stereotypical college frat boy. he’s cocky, loaded with his daddy’s money, and dangerously handsome. it seems like common sense to stay away from him since you’ll never get more than a one-night stand out of it. 

that’s why you choose to turn a blind eye once you’ve come to the horrific realization: you’re in love with him. and you’re just itching to ask…

“are you mine tomorrow? or just mine tonight?”

IMPORTANT: this is part TWO (and the final part) of the r u mine? mini series. make sure to read part one of this fic before proceeding! :)

content: 5.4k words, afab!reader, rich college frat boy gojo, SMUT (fingering & unprotected sex.. wrap it before u tap it kids!) ANGST, (i listened to deftones while writing the breakup era LMAOO i was in my feels 😔) gojo "everything reminds me of her" satoru is really going thru it, idk how to feel about the ending tbh, cheating implications, kinda proofread ig, more emo gojo (u luv to see it)

author's note: guys. where do i even start?? first of all, thank u for all the support on the first part of this mini series!! we also hit 100 followers on this blog so tysm for supporting me n my writing <3 here's the long awaited part two (n also the finale) as i promised that i would get it out over the weekend! just a quick announcement that i may be a little bit more inactive from here on out.. mainly because classes r starting again nd im starting to get busier. i do have more fic plans though, (and a geto smut in my drafts? 👀) so i'll make time to write when i can! happy reading and thank u for all the support on this silly little series :)

tags: @soley613 @feariteriu @bear-likes-mushrooms @96jnie @keilaq1 @whydohumansss @luftyluft @fatbootymuncher (bold = i'm unable to tag u)

reblog and interact for a kiss ;)

everything’s been hazy.

you don’t really remember how you got home– you either waved down a cab or walked until you somehow found your house. either way, the alcohol is worsening the pounding in your ears. the straps of your dress are clinging terribly against your skin–you want to take it off, you want to wear something more comfortable, you want to just go to sleep, preferably forever… but you can’t bring yourself to.

you can’t even bring yourself to move.

so the rumors really were true? but why did gojo pursue so far just for you? why did gojo say those words to you when you spent the night together? why did gojo try so hard to convince you that night that he wanted to have sex with you because he loved you–and not solely because he wanted to have sex?

why did gojo lie to you?

another series of pings sound throughout the room, and you finally move to silence your phone. the noise is all so overwhelming. why the hell is your phone blowing up?

you check your notifications–mostly dms from people you don’t know, either asking if you and satoru were dating, or questioning you about what the hell happened at the party. you know that you’re gonna be the subject of gossip once you’re back at campus, and you hate it.

you were surprised at the numbers once you scrolled down your notification list a little further. ten missed calls from satoru, accompanied by a series of fifteen panicked messages. you open it, and you stare sadly at his contact photo and name, remembering the fond memory behind it. once you two actually started dating, you were merciful enough to add a heart next to his name, and even updated it to “toru”. he was elated at that.

you think you can barely even call him gojo now.

the most recent message was barely sent a minute ago. like it was on cue, you see the bright headlights pull up outside of your door. you wanted to sink into your couch and never resurface ever again.

you hear suguru’s car door open and close, and then frantic knocking outside. you walk to the door while sniffling, looking through the peephole just to confirm your suspicions. it was satoru.

“i can hear you crying through the door, y/n. i know you’re there.” he takes a deep inhale, and the tears start rolling down your cheeks again once you hear the complete and utter vulnerability in his voice. you just don’t know what to believe anymore. “shit, i’m crying too. well, i’m gonna explain myself even if you don’t care enough to listen to me. uhm, believe it or not, what happened at the party wasn’t my doing… at all. when you went to use the bathroom, this girl went up to me and started flirting with me, like she was waiting for you to leave or somethin’. i was g’na tell her to go fuck off but she pushed herself on my lap and before i could do anything about it you walked in and it was just all horrible timing and- god. i know it sounds unbelievable, right? you must think i’m terrible right now.”

“you don’t have to believe me. if i were in your shoes i wouldn’t know what to think either. i’m just… explaining what happened.”

there’s a long period of silence between you and satoru, aside from the occasional sniffling on both ends. you don’t know what to say. you want to believe him. you want to do nothing more than to open the door and let him hold you in his arms again, but you just don’t know what to think anymore. you poured your entire heart out to a man who you knew you shouldn’t be messing with, and now you don’t know who or what to believe. you feel like a fool, and you’re just tired. so damn tired. the silence feels asphyxiating, like it's tearing your relationship with satoru further and further apart the longer it draws on.

satoru is the first one to break the silence. “i’m guessing from the silent treatment that you don’t believe me. it’s okay, y/n. i’ll wait an eternity for you to forgive me because i’ll always choose you- fuck… over anything, and i hope you know that.”

your mind is a mess, and satoru’s words make it even messier.

i’ll wait an eternity for you

i’ll always choose you over anything

you put your head in your hands and sob. it hurts.

a minute passes–gojo hears you get up from where you’re sitting behind the door, and his heart fills with hope.

“i just… i just don’t know how to believe you, gojo.”

his heart breaks when he hears the door–presumably to your bedroom–open and close, leaving him alone with his shattered heart. his heart breaks when he takes in your voice, noticing how weak and exhausted you sounded. he wonders how much you’ve cried just from this past hour alone. his heart breaks once he realizes that he’s alone with his thoughts again, alone with the voice in his head that was berating him for not being able to prevent all of this if he hadn’t frozen up and just pushed her away the second that girl started flirting with him. finally, his heart breaks once it registers that you called him gojo–the last name that he shares with his corrupt and money-crazy family… the family he tries so hard to get away from. it was also the name you called him during the days that you barely trusted him.

now, he’s back to square one, and he has none of your trust again. this time, satoru swears that he’ll do anything in his power to get it back once more.

you didn’t come to school today.

there’s been nothing but radio silence on your end. gojo has sent you countless messages over the weekend asking how you’ve been, with the occasional desperate voicemail where he tells you that he loves and misses you. you’ve turned off your read receipts, so gojo doesn’t even know if you’ve seen his texts or listened to his voicemails. he’s concerned for you, even though he knows that he’s the reason behind all of this. he was hoping to talk things out with you today.. but you weren’t even here.

one thing gojo knew about you is that you cared deeply about your academics, and you wouldn’t miss attendance even if you were sick. it pains him to know that he was the reason that you weren’t here today. you were avoiding him, and he felt helpless.

he’s talked to geto—and the best advice that his best friend could offer was to “find proof that you didn’t cheat on her.” he’s right, though. the last thing you had said to gojo was that you don’t know how to believe if he’s telling the truth or not. gojo has absolutely no idea how to prove his fidelity to you, since words clearly weren’t enough. it frustrates him to no end.

gojo now knows that he feels absolutely lost. all when he’s not with you.

it feels nerve-wracking to walk the halls. 

he remembers telling you the night that you slept together that he’d learned over time to drown out the rumors about him. he learned not to care about what other people thought about him, and he eventually became unaffected by the school’s gossip. 

however, this time was different.

this time, he finds it difficult to drown out the rumors when he hears your name in them. he flinches every time someone whispers your name and his as he walks the halls, feeling that all eyes are on him. “i heard y/n and gojo broke up…” “they were dating?!” “yeah.. i didn’t believe it at first, either! apparently he…”

he doesn’t want to hear it, so he walks a little faster. it hasn’t felt this suffocating to be on campus in a while.

maybe that’s partially why you didn’t show up. rumors are hard to ignore if you don’t know how to shun them out. 

gojo lets out a sigh. he decides that he’s going to ditch the rest of class. you weren’t here, he couldn’t talk to you, and he felt he was gonna go mad if he heard your name spoken by someone again, so he turns to leave, but flinches as he feels a hand lightly tap his shoulder.

“gojo-san?”

he turns around, with a girl that he’s never seen before standing in front of him… not that he pays attention to them in the first place, though. he raises his eyebrow in question, and the girl looks so nervous she might pass out. “i have to tell you something-“

“if it’s a love confession or whatever, i don’t want to hear it-“

“-no!” she flushes a deep shade of red, and he fights the urge to roll his eyes. she coughs awkwardly at his expression. “um, no.. it’s not that. please, just give me two minutes in the library. i have something to tell you.”

he decides to entertain this girl for a bit. he’d be lying if he said that he wasn’t curious about what she had to talk to him for. gojo sighs and says, “two minutes. that’s all you’re getting.”

“this is about the party last friday, no?” he says while taking a seat near one of the tables. he feels sick just being here. he’d never gone to the library before meeting you–as he had no reason to go here at all. then, he started accompanying you everywhere as he tried to win your heart. “study dates” were frequent here, and he even remembers forcefully changing his contact name and number on your phone during one of your dates.

gosh, everything literally reminds him of you. he can barely live like this.

she takes a seat across from him, and she shamefully nods at his words. “i went to the party on friday, and i just want to say i’m sorry-”

gojo gets up to leave. he can’t do this. he doesn’t need anyone’s pity. pity can’t change the fact that you still won’t talk to him. she panics as gojo is about to walk away. “wait!”

the librarian tells her to quiet down, and she mutters an apology. still, she persists. “please, just wait for two minutes… i need two minutes to explain myself. you promised you’d give me that.”

she stares at gojo, who hasn’t left yet, and takes that as her opportunity to speak. “i was a friend of… her,” he doesn’t need an explanation to know who she was talking about. “the reason why she came up to you was because of a dare i told her to do. she’s had a crush on you for a while now, so of course she was willing to flirt with you.”

“um, that was the dare, by the way. my friend told me to record it, because we were all drunk, and we thought it would be funny. just another memory to laugh at in the future, right? we didn’t know you were dating the girl you were with at the party. sorry but, we assumed she was just a fling… or something… we didn’t know she was your girlfriend.”

“yeah, i was dating the girl at the party.” gojo scoffs, and he feels his anger bubbling up again. “then your friend had to do that stupid dare, and she won’t fuckin’ talk to me now.”

“i’m sorry-”

“i don’t need your apologies. is that why you came up to me? to apologize so you don’t feel guilty about what happened anymore?” gojo sneers. he was right, though. guilt is ridden all over her face, and she can’t even meet his eyes. he’s about to leave, thinking that this entire conversation was useless, but gojo thinks back on what she said earlier.

“...my friend told me to record it…”

he turns back to look at her, which surprises her, to say the least. “hey, you said you recorded the dare, right?”

“uhm, yes.”

“so you still have the video?”

“it should be in my camera roll somewhere-”

“if you came here to apologize to me, then you should send me that video.” she looked a little horrified at his words, and gojo could almost laugh. “what? i’m not gonna do anything bad with it, god.”

she thinks about what gojo’s intentions could be with that video, and her eyes light up in recognition as she connects the dots from what he said beforehand. i was dating the girl at the party… then your friend had to do that stupid dare… and she won’t fuckin’ talk to me now.

she nods in understanding. this is the least she could do for him. she pulls out her phone, looking for the video, and says, “i hope you two make up soon, gojo-san.”

gojo satoru walks- no, runs out of that library with determination. determination as he finally has the video evidence of what happened at the party–his saving grace so he could finally get you to forgive him.

you miss him.

you miss him like hell, actually, and you blink at the messages he just sent you in complete disbelief.

you didn’t show up to class today because you were afraid. you were afraid to see satoru again, yes, but you were also afraid of what everyone else would say about you. the party was one thing, but the after-effects and the rumors were something completely different. you didn’t have the mental capacity to deal with that, unlike satoru, so you stayed home. all because you were afraid of what would happen on campus.

you just wish things would go back to how they were before… all of this happened. you didn’t want to admit it, but you’ve read all of satoru’s messages, and you’ve listened to all of his voicemails. you’ve cried to them. and it hurts because you’re still torn apart in the midst of your own feelings. and now, satoru wants to talk to you, because he’s been wanting to do nothing but fix everything between the two of you.

the doorbell rings, and you almost jump out of your skin. 

you didn’t even know if you would open the door or not. despite that, you felt your body moving on its own, like you were relying on your own instincts. you washed your face to get rid of the dried tears on your cheeks, brushed the tangles out of your hair, and dressed into something more presentable. the next thing you know, you’re leaning against the wall next to the front entrance. your shadow is visible underneath the door, so satoru knows that you’re here.

“hi, y/n..” he sounded so nervous that you almost laughed, but you felt equally as terrified as him. “i have something to show you… uh, on my phone. if you don’t want to see me, it’s fine, i’ll just send it to you, but i’d really prefer if you open the door and we’ll talk about this inside-”

your hand is already reaching the door knob before you can even think about it. it’s such an impulse decision that you look at him in surprise once you open the door. it’s the first time you’ve seen him ever since you were at the party. it’s only been three days, but you can’t help but notice how his eyebags are more prominent, his eyes are a little redder, and he looks nothing short of exhausted.

“hey,” he manages to breathe out, his eyes meeting yours. “can i come in? please?”

you nod, too stunned to say anything, and he exhales in relief as he walks in. the two of you sit on the couch, and gojo notices how you’re keeping your distance from him. it breaks his heart a little.

he looks for the video on his phone and gets ready to show it to you. this is it. his last ditch effort for your forgiveness. he’s really fuckin’ hoping that this works. “i got this video from a girl who came to the party. it’s a recording of, um, what happened.”

he hands the phone over to you, and you take it skeptically, still choosing to keep silent. you press play, and you watch the recording. a shaky hand holds the camera, and the person behind it says, “holy shit, she’s actually doing it!” they're presumably talking to their friend, and the camera focuses on a girl walking over to gojo. your heart is pounding, eyes widening in recognition as you stare at her... the one who caused all of this in the first place.

the all too familiar girl comes up to him, saying something out of earshot. when gojo looks at her, completely uninterested, she pulls that move. the scene you saw at the party before you ran out. tears fill your eyes again, and you almost want to stop the video, but your interest is piqued at the next part.

..this… this part was something that you didn’t see. gojo angrily reacts at the girl’s move, with her falling on the floor as she looks at him, stunned at how furious he looks. the person behind the camera gasps, continuing to record out of shock as a crowd of people turn to stare at the two. geto eventually comes into the frame and takes gojo away from all the chaos. the video ends there, and you grip gojo’s phone shakily.

holy shit.

tears roll down your face, but this time, they’re tears of relief. you waste no time in hugging satoru, crying your heart out as you bury your face in his neck. you’re happy. you’re so fucking happy, and so relieved knowing that he didn’t lie to you. of course he didn’t.

“m’sorry-” you sniffle into his shoulder. gojo is so shocked at what was happening that it takes him a second to hug you back, but when he does, he starts crying. “m’so fucking sorry i didn’t believe you-”

“shh, it’s okay, it’s okay…” he says, and you only hug him tighter. “m’so tired, you know that? these past three days fucking sucked. i’m just so glad you’re in my arms again, fuck-”

“-i love you, i love you, i love you so fucking much, toru.” you repeat, laughing as you kiss him all over his face. it’s been a while since you said that to someone. you wipe his never-ending tears away, still in disbelief, and whisper, “you’re real. right? you’re actually here with me right now ‘nd i’m not dreaming, right?

“i’m very much real, baby.” he says, putting his forehead against yours as you take in his features again. “god, i missed that pretty face so much.”

he finally closes the gap between you two, pulling you into a much needed kiss. it’s a kiss filled with so many emotions–desperation, happiness, relief. satoru thinks his heart is finally whole again. he’s missed you. he’s missed you so fucking much, and you’ve missed him too. 

you’re like an anchor to satoru. the light of his life that keeps him grounded. and god, he’s been apart from you for too long. 

you reposition yourself as you’re deepening the kiss. you’re on his lap now, and you wrap your arms around his neck, tugging on his hair in desperation. “oh yeah? ‘y gonna do anything about it?"

“of course i am,” he says, hands roaming underneath your shirt as he caresses your bare waist. fuck. he needs you. right now. especially after thinking that he was about to lose you forever–for something that he didn’t even do. “i’m gonna show you just how much i missed you, baby.”

gojo can’t let you go.

you’re in your bedroom, and both of you waste no time undressing each other. he takes you in–all of you, in awe of every crevice of your body as he trails his hands further down your waist.

god, you’re so beautiful. “i can’t believe i almost lost you.”

his words are shaky, like he’s still uncertain that you’re real and you’re in his arms again. he can’t seem to break himself away from you, almost like you’ll disappear if he lets you go. “but i’m here now, toru.”

“i’m here to stay, and i’ll never let you go again… ‘m yours,” you whisper, and your words set a fire in him, fueling his body with nothing but desperation. desperation to have you right here, and right now. 

he wastes no time in plunging two of his fingers in your cunt, and he groans at just how wet you are. “satoru-”

“fuck, you’re so wet… and it’s all for me,” he mutters, spreading your legs effortlessly when you try to close them, thighs shaking in pure pleasure. he adds another finger, and you already feel stretched to the brim, and you haven’t even taken him in yet. the thought of his cock inside of you makes you even wetter than you already are, and you look up at satoru with eyes full of lust and desire. “missed you so much, baby. missed you and your pretty little cunny,”

his fingers are long, and you whine at how full you feel right now. you’re so loud, and you don’t even care. right now, it’s just you and satoru finally feeling each other again. it’s only been three days, but it feels like you’ve been apart for years.

everything about this was filthy. from your erotic moans and the way your cunt squelched against his fingers… not to mention the vice grip you had on them- fuck, satoru thinks he can cum untouched just from watching you like this.

“haa-” you whimper when his fingers curl and hit that spot in your cunt that you can barely seem to reach on your own. it’s exhilarating, and only fuels the growing heat in your stomach. “toru- don’t stop- please, i’m close-”

“really?” he taunts, and it feels so fucking good–your head is numb, and the only thoughts filling your head are thoughts of satoru. the pleasure is too much, and you try to get away from him, but he keeps you in place, curling his fingers faster as punishment. “don’t run away from me, baby… be a good girl and just take it, yeah?”

“toru- fuck- i’m gonna cum, please-” you’re on the brink of release, but suddenly, he stops, ruining your orgasm. “no- wait-”

he pulls his fingers out, and you whine at the loss of stimulation. you were so close–why did he take that away from you? you try and swat at his hands, but he just takes his fingers and puts them in his mouth, locking his eyes with yours with a sly smile. “you taste so sweet, i can’t help it,”

“aww, is my baby mad ‘cause she didn’t get to cum?” he coos sarcastically, caging you in between his arms as he tilts your face up with his finger. “too bad… the only thing you’re cumming on tonight is on my cock.”

and with that, he eases his painfully hard member into your walls. your insides hugged him perfectly–it was like you were made just for him. you gasp once he’s fully sheathed himself inside of you. his fingers were already a lot to take in, but his cock was something completely different. he moans your name, barely keeping his cool. “fuck- you’re squeezing me so tight,”

“missed everything about you, baby. i need to hold you, please,” he pleads desperately, clasping your small hands against his. the size difference alone between the two of you almost makes him cum, but he holds himself back, choosing to bask in this intimate moment. he’s missed every part about this. “you ready f���me?-”

“-just fuck me, satoru, please-” he doesn’t need another confirmation from you.

he can’t bring himself to hold back. next thing you know, he’s fucking you into the mattress, and you feel the headboard shake at how fast satoru is going. fuck–you feel every part of him, every part of his cock as it slams against your tight hole. he’s so big, you feel yourself gasping for breath, and you moan out loud as you notice the prominent bulge forming in your stomach. it’s him, it’s all him, and it’s driving you mad.

satoru follows your eyes in the midst of all of this, and he watches everything in fascination. he decides to be a little mean, and presses his free hand against your stomach–it feels so good, you could almost scream at the pleasure. “you feel that, baby? that’s all me inside of you, hmm?”

“please-” the onset of pleasure feels so overwhelming, and tears fill your eyes. you feel an oncoming orgasm coming, and you know your release will hit you like a tidal wave. your heart is pounding, but satoru only grips your hand tighter and fucks you even harder. “oh, fuck!”

“m close, baby. are you g’na cum too?” he manages to say between pants, and you somehow nod, mind hazy and your release only coming closer. you feel your eyes rolling to the back of your head. “cum inside of me, toru- please- i need to feel you-”

gojo groans at your words, and you both cum together. you ride out your high, screaming as you spasm around his cock, the pleasure overfilling your senses until you’re trembling from it. he fills you up, staying inside of you as the two of you catch your breath. everything’s hazy, and you’re barely aware of your surroundings… it takes you a few minutes to recover. 

“angel, are you with me?”

“yeah, fuck, just… give me a second.” you say, and gojo thinks that he would gladly give you all the time in the world if you needed it. he pulls out of you with a hiss, and his warm seed drips out of your cunny. it makes his cock twitch, but he knows that you’re probably not considering a round two right now.

when you come to your senses, you notice satoru–who put his clothes back on already, wiping your legs down with a rag. his touch is so soft, like he’s afraid to break you, unlike how he handled you just a moment ago. you look down and notice the bruises starting to form on your legs and waist. satoru looks guilty as he stares. “i didn’t go too rough with you, did i?”

“not at all,” you reassure him, and you see him soften up a little. “it felt really good, actually… thank you, toru.”

“s nothing. you know my girl only gets the best,” he teases, and you laugh. “i’m gonna go get you some new clothes and some water… i’ll be back, okay?”

you nod, closing your eyes again as satoru leaves the room. he’s back in two minutes, and he’s gently changing you into new clothes that he found in your drawer. you’re so tired that you can hardly move, so you let satoru do all the work. he caresses all of your bruises, apologizing again even if you already said that it was okay. he’s so gentle, a swift juxtaposition to what just happened beforehand, and so soft with you. once you’re clothed again, he brings a glass of water against your lips, and you greedily gulp it down as he keeps a hand on your back. he places it on the nightstand once you’re finished, and you grab his wrist after, tugging him back to the bed. “lay with me for a bit, toru.”

satoru doesn’t hesitate, laying down next to you on the bed and placing your head against his chest. your breathing is back to normal, and you feel his heart thumping against your ear. you wrap your arms around him, and satoru thinks that this moment is so domestic that he can’t help but daydream. he looks at your face, memorizing every feature about you with a lovesick look in his eyes. you’re so beautiful, so perfect, and he’s just so fucking glad that he didn’t lose you. 

satoru thinks he could wake up to this everyday.

“you’re starin.” you say with an amused look on your face. gojo doesn’t even try to play it off. “what’s on your mind?”

“nothing. i just… love you so much, y/n.” he says, pulling you closer and kissing your forehead. satoru would trade anything if it meant that this moment wouldn’t end. “m so glad you chose me.”

“i think it’s the other way around,” you tease. “you chose me. ever since you saw me at the party, you’ve done nothing but try to win my heart.”

“how could i not? there was just something different about you compared to everyone else.” he reminisces about that night at the party, and how far he’s come with his relationship with you. he remembers that night like it just happened yesterday.

you sigh, almost like you were thinking about that night too. you pull him into a kiss, finally finding the courage within you to say a proper “i love you.” to the man who meant the world to you.

“i love you too, angel.” he says, and you snuggle into him tighter. “you know i’ll always choose you…”

“..from this life and into the next. i’m so glad you gave me a chance, y/n. i’ll forever be grateful to now be called your husband. i’m the luckiest man ever knowing that you let me into your life, and i’m the one who gets to read these vows to marry you. i cannot wait to spend the rest of my life with you. i love you so much, y/n gojo.” he’s crying. gojo satoru is crying, and he’s hardly ever cried before. though, that changed after he met you.

the last time he cried was during pre-k, and now he’s done it time and time again… all because of you. he cried once during your first argument with him, another during the night he thought he’d lost you forever, and then another when he finally had you in his arms again once he proved his innocence… and now, during his wedding, when he finally gets to call you his wife.

and when you share your kiss at the end of the ceremony to symbolize your togetherness, you hear all your friends cheering. mainly shoko, utahime, and geto. if you showed this very scene to shoko during your university years, she’d call you crazy, saying this would never happen. gojo satoru was once a man who’d never willingly committed in a relationship before, but you came into his life and you changed everything about him. it was like magic.

you pull away from the kiss, wiping his tears away and whispering against his lips, drowning out the crowd, “thank you.”

for memorizing all my favorite foods so you could buy them for me. for walking me to class every day. for making me fall in love with you that one day at the park. for waiting for me to slowly love you even when i was scared to love. for waiting for me even if i didn’t trust you. for loving me. for proving those rumors wrong. for proving that satoru gojo is actually capable of falling in love and pouring his heart out to the one he loves the most.

for everything that you have done to love me.

it was like gojo could hear all of your unspoken words. he smiles, letting one more tear roll down his cheek, and says, “it’s all worth it if it’s for you.”

thanks for reading <3 -kami.

[landosjpg]

the black dog | ln

the one where you watch your ex boyfriend walk into some bar called the black dog.

lando norris x gender-neutral!reader

word count: ~1.9k

warnings: angst!!!!, happy ending so fluff as well, brief discussion of bad mental health, lando is a bit of a prick at some point, exes to lovers, one sexual innuendo (?)

note: based on this request and obviously the black dog by taylor swift. this is one of my favorite taylor songs EVER i got so excited when i got this request. i also love a good angsty, heart-breaking fic so giving this a happy ending was a bit harder than it should’ve but i hope you enjoy it!

“stop that,” you softly cooed, your hands cupping his cheeks to try and make him look at you.

the past few weeks had been harsh on him, and you could feel how every self-deprecating comment just made him drown deeper into his own head. you just wanted the best for him.

he didn’t answer. instead, he looked away again, trying his best to avoid your gaze at all costs.

“it’s just been a bad weekend, baby. next one will be better,” you added.

“stop with the optimistic bullshit,” he rudely said before you could add anything else to try and cheer him up.

you knew he was angry —rightfully so —after missing on a potential win only a few days before, but you couldn’t just sit and watch him bring himself down anymore.

“it just hurts to see you like this,” you mumbled.

“it’s hurting you?” he snapped, his tone accusing. “why do you have to make everything about you, every single time?”

as his words escaped his lips, he gently pushed you off his lap, immediately getting up from the couch.

“i’m just saying…” you tried to explain, although his words hurt more than you would ever admit out loud.

“i don’t care what you’re saying,” he cut you off. “it’s always the same story with you. the world doesn’t fucking revolve around you, you know?”

your lips parted, intending to defend yourself, but no words left your mouth. not like lando would had let you speak, anyway.

“this is the last thing i need right now, i’m done here,” he grumbled.

you froze at the tone of his voice, not having heard him talking to you like that ever before. and you didn’t do anything to stop him when he picked up his jacket and walked to the entrance of your apartment, announcing his departure with a loud slam of the front door.

he just needed time, you told yourself.

but he didn’t call, and you didn’t wake up to a simple apology in your messages and him asking to see you as you were used to.

and it had been forty-two days since he had stormed out of your apartment and, unknowingly to you, vowed to never talk to you again.

and after six weeks of no contact, you still missed him.

lando had been more than just your boyfriend, he had been your best friend for as long as you could remember; he was there, in every little memory you had.

you had always been the first person he ran to whenever the smallest thing happened, and for the past few weeks you had to settle for watching his life go on without you through pictures and media outlets.

and as much as your friends tried to tell you that it would get better, every morning without him just got harder than the previous one; used to having his arms wrapped all around you and his curls tickling your neck, waking up in a cold bed was certainly something you weren’t quite fond of.

however, he seemed to be moving on.

that’s what you thought as you sat in the darkness of your room, the only light illuminating the space being the dim glow of your phone’s screen as you intently watched the small, blue dot moving on your screen.

he had forgotten to turn his location off.

like every weekend since the break up, you watched him walk into some random bar in a different city, piercing a new, deeper hole in your heart every time. and you couldn’t help but hope that they played your song each night, that even the smallest thing reminded him of you.

but instead, every morning you woke up to a new picture of him leaving the place with some girl wrapped around his arm, while you could barely wear your favorite clothes because they took you back to a memory you shared with him.

you didn’t understand how he didn’t miss you, how he could be doing so good without you by his side.

୨୧

it had never been his intention to walk out of your life that afternoon. but when the anger washed away, all he could feel was shame.

guilt, for how he had talked to you when all you wanted was to help. and he wasn’t sure he could ever look at you in the eyes without the feeling overfilling his senses. so, instead, he did what he knew best: he ran away.

and the only thing that could take you off his mind for some time was drowning his own pain in alcohol every weekend, end the night with some girl’s legs wrapped around him.

but that night, he froze as the first notes of your song started playing; the song that had started playing when you got in his car the first time he took you out on a proper date. and the upbeat music took him right back to that day.

he could still picture the sight of your teary eyes as you walked into his apartment after another failed date —the guy hadn’t even showed up; the sound of your sobs as you buried your face on his chest, looking for some comfort, still making his heart clench.

“you deserve better,” he had whispered into your hair, placing a soft kiss on top of your head. “someone who’s willing to give you everything.”

“i’m tired of searching,” you had simply mumbled, feeling hopeless after so many disappointments.

“maybe you don’t have to search for it,” he had said before he could even think about his words. “maybe it’s been right in front of your nose all this time.”

at the underlying confession of his words, you raised your head from his chest to look up at him.

“hm?” you hummed.

lando had always liked you; but he had also been scared of you not reciprocating his feelings, of your friendship being ruined by the love he had for you. however, he had been completely oblivious as to the way you had always looked at him.

but that time, he caught the glint in your eyes as his gaze met yours, and so he confidently asked:

“can i take you out on a date?”

he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding as he saw you crack a smile, relief washing all over him.

“i would love to,” you mumbled.

he smiled at your reply, his thumbs coming up to wipe the remains of your tears.

“tonight, then?” he softly kissed your cheek before you nodded and wrapped your arms around his frame, unknowing of how the turn your relationship would take after that night.

he looked down at the girl who was grinding herself against him, trying to ignore the memories flooding his mind; but her eyes didn’t sparkle the way yours did as the song played. and he knew she just wouldn’t get the jokes he was so tempted to make, the ones that would send you into a fist of laughter despite of the many times you had heard them before.

in short, she simply wasn’t you. and he knew he wouldn’t ever feel that way with someone else.

“excuse me,” he said, trying to push her away from him.

he made his way out of the bar pushing in between the sea of people, his phone clutched in his hand the second he stepped a foot outside.

he sighed as he looked at his screen, the cool air making him come back to his senses; he couldn’t just text you. not after ghosting you for over a month.

but he missed you, so what else could he do? how else could he apologize for what he did?

୨୧

you turned around in bed as you felt the room being illuminated again by the screen of your phone, a message interrupting your attempt to sleep.

your heart skipped a beat as you saw his contact picture, followed by a simple “are you up?”. you couldn’t believe your eyes, anxiety coursing through your veins as you stared at the message.

“you still have read receipts on”

“say something, please”

fuck, of course. and you had been staring at his text for five minutes straight.

“what?” you simply typed with shaky fingers; it was dry, yes, but you were still hurt about how things ended between the two of you.

his answer came almost immediately: “just wanted to apologize” it read.

but nothing could’ve prepared you for his next message, asking if he could come over instead of doing so over text.

you hesitated for a few minutes; you knew you shouldn’t, but you needed closure as well.

so, naturally, you accepted.

you anxiously padded around your house as you waited for him, biting your nails as you imagined every possible scenario that could happen. five. ten. fifteen minutes, and then you heard a knock on the door.

the door opened slowly, revealing the figure of your ex-boyfriend.

you stepped aside and let him in, closing the door behind him and turning around with your gaze fixed on the floor. the silence was deafening,and the situation felt awkward.

“can i have some water?” lando tried to break the ice, his eyes fixed on you as you simply nodded and disappeared into the kitchen.

when you came back only a few minutes later with two glasses on your hands, he had made himself comfortable. you walked to the couch and sat next to him, with a considerable distance between the two of you.

“i just…” he broke the silence again, his voice low and slightly nervous. you didn’t dare look at him yet, so you looked down at your lap, where you fidgeted with your fingers.

you heard him sigh as he chose his next words carefully.

“i never meant to hurt you, or ruin what we had,” lando started. “it was a few bad weeks, and i know i shouldn’t have, but i took it all out on you. and then i didn’t think i could even look you in the face after what i said.”

you looked up at him, your eyes starting to water as you took in his words.

“you could’ve just explained yourself, i would’ve understood,” you replied with a thin, vulnerable voice.

“i was ashamed of myself after the fight and i thought running away from all of it would be the best,” he said as his gaze met yours. “truth is i haven’t stopped thinking about you for a single minute all this time. i really miss you,” he almost whispered.

“i…” you stuttered.

“i get it if you can’t forgive me,” his voice broke mid-sentence.

“‘s not that,” you mumbled, a few tears running down your cheeks. “just wish it didn’t take you this long.”

you noticed his pained expression as he noticed the tears on your face, quickly whispering a soft “c’mere” as he opened his arms. you sighed and scooped next to him, letting his arms wrap around your frame in a comforting hug.

“i’m really sorry,” you heard him whisper into your hair before he planted a gentle kiss on top of your head. “i won’t leave again.”

“promise?” you murmured, snuggling closer into his embrace.

“promise, baby,” he answered in the same low voice.

you nodded slightly, your eyes fluttering close as you took in his scent and the way his grip on you tightened, an oath to never let you go again.

[always-just-red]

Merry Christmas, guys!!! Ok, so this is a day early, but I wanted to say thanks to you all with a feel-good follow-up to my Game Night fic! So, here: a Christmas Eve sleepover with the boys, and they’re on their VERY best behaviour this time, I promise 😌

The Night Before Christmas

L&DS Boys X Reader

(Recommended to read this fic first, if you haven't already!)

Summary: It’s time to get the gang back together!!!

Genre: Fluff + humour

Warnings/Additional Tags: gn!reader, kinda poly? but mostly platonic, a lil bit of wholesome intimacy, one particularly suggestive joke from Sylus (he can’t help himself), also probably needs another proofread but my eyes are tired 💀

| Word count: 4.8k | Masterlist | Opt-in to my taglist here!

Disclaimer: Characters belong to Love and Deepspace. All work is my own, so please don't repost or plagiarise!

“Right! Let’s try this again.”

You glance around your living room with your hands on your hips, channelling your inner Captain Jenna as you fight to suppress flashbacks that verge on traumatic.

Some of this is exactly the same as last time. Sylus is sprawled in the same spot on your couch, looking inordinately pleased with himself for someone who has only just arrived. The very image of smugness; you immediately suspect that something is horribly wrong, or on track to go horribly wrong. You glance to the other couch, where Xavier and Rafayel sit, equally braced for your presentation. Neither one has been teleported to the roof of your building.

Sylus is reading your relief, and he gives you an exclusive smile, as if to say: yet.

Try not to think about it.

You stand by a large drawing pad— currently flipped closed to create a suspense that only Xavier has bought into. He gives you an eager nod, the blue of his eyes warm and encouraging.

The faces around you haven’t changed, but your little apartment has. Strings of twinkling lights run around your walls, casting faint, festive glows. There’s frost on your windows. Littered everywhere are ornaments: small, glittery birds and wintery creatures. Lots of snowman plushies, courtesy of a few, dedicated arcade expeditions with your favourite doctor.

New season, new start.

“We all remember how this went last time,” you push on finally. “Mistakes were made. Shit happened. Whatever— we’re not gonna dwell on it.”

Sylus lifts his hand. “I, for one, would enjoy a reminder of said mistakes.”

“Motion denied,” you dismiss with a grin and a customer-service enthusiasm that screams: don’t fuck with me right now. Sylus’s eyes sparkle, like embers anxious to become something brighter— more destructive. Don’t think about it. “It wasn’t my fault. You outnumbered me four-to-one that night, which is why my first order of business today is to appoint a co-host.”

Rafayel’s hand shoots into the air. You look at him incredulously. Zayne is stood beside you, his arms folded, and everyone else in the room has connected those particular dots.

“It’s Zayne, Rafayel,” you sigh. 

“What?!” He sits up straighter. “Why him?! What are his qualifications, huh? His credentials?”

“I’ve never set the kitchen on fire,” Zayne says.

The artist scoffs, adds under his breath: “Turned it into an ice rink, though.”

There’s a chuckle from Sylus, and a part of you feels bad, pitting Zayne against the others like this. But he’s not alone. He has you, just you, so you should probably do something. “That actually brings me really nicely to my next point, Raf, thank you.”

Unexpected praise. Rafayel stutters, a faint blush to his cheeks, and you take full advantage of having staggered him. “Zayne, do you wanna…?”

“Of course.” The dark-haired man adjusts his glasses, then addresses the rest of the room. “In the interest of everyone’s safety, we have devised a few rules to be adhered to for the rest of the evening. These will be enforced by a point system, which we will record… here.”

He flips the drawing pad open, and a blank table fills the top half of the page. Each quarter has been assigned a name. “Basically—” you gesture to it— “three strikes and you’re out.”

None of your guests look perturbed by this.

“The first rule is simple,” Zayne explains, pulling away a strip of paper from the bottom of the page, then reading the writing underneath: “No unauthorised use of Evols.”

Rafayel’s hand shoots up again. You tilt your head at it. “Yes, Raf?”

“Ok, so what if there’s a power-cut or something? Lights are out. Heating’s out. Big disaster, yeah? You’re saying I couldn’t—?” He clicks his fingers, spawning a small flame.

“We would use my Evol,” Xavier says with the gentle authority he uses to steer civilians away from a Wanderer incursion. “It’s safer.”

The flame is snuffed out. Rafayel huffs: “Don’t you use it to, like, kill things?”

“Yeah…” Xavier shrugs. “Bad things.”

“Second rule!” you chime.  

“Second rule,” Zayne echoes, peeling back the next strip of paper. There’s absolutely no showmanship, nor energy at all as he continues, “No unauthorised sarcasm.”

Another hand raises. “What would be authorised sarcasm?” Xavier asks, squinting as though he can’t quite figure it out on his own.

You purse your lips in thought. “If it makes me laugh?”

Rafayel is stroking his chin, his eyes narrowed, because he’s also thinking. “High risk, high reward,” he muses, and you shoot him a smile.

This is going better than you thought it would, actually. If you were to turn a few more pages of the drawing pad, you would see crude illustrations of the worst-case scenarios you’d sketched out for Zayne earlier. There’s one where Rafayel is trying to strangle Sylus with Christmas lights. There’s another where Zayne has turned you all into snowmen.

Don’t get ahead of yourself, though. The evening is young, and the snowman scenario is still very much on the table.

Culprit of about ninety percent of your nightmarish visions and drawings— Sylus has been unnervingly silent. You meet eyes with him, an inherent mistrust in your gaze. The success of this sweet, humble Christmas Eve hinges on you figuring out what he’s here for. His agenda. His ulterior motives.

What does he want from tonight? He smirks at you. You’re vaguely competent, and you can figure it out without him holding your hand, can’t you?

That reminds you of something. “Zayne.” You jostle your co-host by his arm. “Do the last rule!”

You’re excited about the last rule.

Zayne isn’t; he hesitates. “The last rule…” He rubs at the back of his neck. “It’s… it’s only applicable to you, Sylus.”

Sylus is now also excited about the last rule. You can tell from the way his lips part, for a second, like he wants to tell you just how flattered he is you spend so much of your time thinking about him.

You put Zayne out of his misery, tearing the final strip of paper away from the pad. The paper flutters to the ground like a very plain snowflake, and you wiggle your fingers, adorning the final rule with a touch of pizazz:

No smirking, sass, or general smugness.

A corner of Sylus’s mouth lifts. “Believe it or not, kitten, your little point system doesn’t scare me.”

You pick up the pen and score a mark under his name.

“Oh no,” he mutters lifelessly.

“Sarcasm!” Rafayel coughs.

You’re well ahead of him, already turning to make another mark. “Gods,” you hear Sylus grimace, not much more than a whisper, “you’re such a boy scout.”

There’s a snort from Rafayel. “Sorry, say that again? I couldn’t hear you over the sound of you totally getting kicked out of here.”

“Sarcasm,” Sylus says.

“Wait, I didn’t mean— no!”

You giggle as you issue Rafayel’s first strike, and he groans behind you, slumping down in his seat. When you turn back around, his face is buried in his hands.

Sylus is smirking again, but the expression drops the moment he senses your gaze. You both know what’s at stake here. Back in the N109 Zone, Luke and Kieran are lamenting the fact that you’ve stolen their leader— it’s not very Christmassy of you, after all. There were a lot of things they wanted to do with him. Snowball fights, presents, and a heist that required disguises: Santa and his two, hard-working elves. They already have the suit, custom-made for him.

So here is the big, bad boss of Onychinus, hiding in your apartment, and definitely not smirking.

You pop the lid back onto your pen, then post it into your pocket like you’re holstering an all-powerful weapon. That’s one point to you and Zayne, and zero points to Sylus, thank you very much.

…

“What are you doing?”

Sylus sighs, evading a furious lilac gaze while he focuses on the task at hand. Freshly escaped from you and the doctor’s terrifying lecture, he’s making the most of his liberty.

“What I am doing,” he mumbles, tying string around a sprig of mistletoe, “is between me and our charming host. Run along, little artist.” He tightens the knot. “This doesn’t concern you.”

Rafayel crosses his arms, his eyes dark. “You’re cheating.”

“Ha.” Sylus spares him a glance out of pity. “You’re jealous.”

“Am not.”

He definitely is, but Sylus doesn’t have time for this game. He can hear you in your bedroom, rooting around for the phone charger you’d vanished in search of. Your door isn’t closed, but it’s closed enough. You can’t see him. He can’t see you. What a perfect opportunity.

“Give it to me,” Rafayel says— an interruption that warrants a roll of the eyes.

“No.”

“Give it—“ the artist starts again, then makes a grab for the mistletoe. Now that’s jealousy. He could incinerate the plant with a click of his fingers, but no, he wants it. Covets it.

Sylus chuckles quietly, his arm stretching up: holding the mistletoe out of an ever-more desperate reach.

To Rafayel’s credit, he persists. He goes up on his toes, tugging at the older man’s sleeve to try and drag the mistletoe closer. The plant evaporates in a swirl of dark energy the second he succeeds. It materialises behind Sylus’s back, in his other hand, and Rafayel realises instantly. He tries to stretch his arms around him. To take it from him.

“Absolutely not!”

Sylus’s fingers are suddenly empty. Mistletoe-less. He turns reluctantly, still holding Rafayel back.

You stand at your wide-open door, one hand on your hips and the other clutching his confiscated item. You’re frowning. Tapping your foot. Your lips are pursed adorably.

“What a coincidence, kitten,” Sylus smiles, and behind him, Rafayel pokes his tongue out, overcome with nausea. “I was just thinking about you.”

“Clearly.” You jostle the mistletoe, looking… disappointed? Huh. “Never thought I’d catch you indulging an old cliche.”

Sylus shrugs charmingly, like a cat performing a leisurely stretch after toppling a vase from a very high shelf.

“Give me the rest of it,” you command.

“Hmm?”

“The back-up mistletoe, Sy. I’m not an idiot.”

Sylus scoffs, but you do have him wrapped oh so prettily around your finger. He rolls his neck, stalling. If giving up were a slope, he would already be a heap at the bottom of it, but he doesn’t really mind. Three more sprigs of mistletoe appear from thin air, dropping into your open hands.

“Honestly, Sylus,” you groan, stepping past him. Then you thrust the plants to the artist’s chest. “Burn these, Raf.” You’re dusting your hands down as you walk away.

Sylus frowns. That’s neither ideal nor part of the plan.

Rafayel is looking at him, telling him with gloating silence that there’s no playing diplomat, here— no negotiating the return of the hostages. That bridge has been— rather fittingly— burned. The mistletoe turns slowly to ash: darkened by licks of flame that curl with the eager spite of their master’s lips.

It would be beautiful if it wasn’t so damned inconvenient. When the fire’s had its fun, one sprig of mistletoe remains, rich green and ivory— wholly untouched. You’re across the room, talking to Zayne, so Rafayel smirks in triumph. Tucks his prize into his pocket.

Sylus’s heart sinks with it, but he still smiles back.

…

Rafayel isn’t looking too good.

Well, the Rafayel is looking fine, but your Rafayel? Not so much. You steal a glance at the artist across the cluttered kitchen island; he’s sat, leaning, propped up on his elbows, his eyes glazed— he’s clearly away with the fishies. He catches you staring. Gives you a wink.

You glance down at the gingerbread man you’ve been decorating: the blue-pink of his iced eyes, and the mess of purple hair, at least three shades too dark. Oh, gods— probably a million shades too dark through the gaze of a Lemurian. At least the outfit is cute? You’ve recreated Rafayel’s signature cardigan. The plaid pattern isn’t quite straight, but that was a… deliberate choice. This is your interpretation of his cardigan, and you wanted it to reflect its owner. A little all over the place, but still, you love it. Even when it’s coming undone, it keeps you warm.

“Would you like to go next?”

Zayne is talking to you, smiling at you. He was the first to reveal his gingerbread creation: a miniature Xavier that was surprisingly true to life. Your hunting partner had almost glowed with delight, while you were dark with jealousy. The biscuit sits before you all, boasting details that could only be achieved with an exceedingly steady hand.

Worse: Rafayel’s gingerbread is next to it, stupidly, predictably perfect. It’s Zayne. It’s really Zayne, from the sweep of black hair to the hazel eyes; how on earth did he manage to make that colour? The tiny doctor is dressed in his lab coat, sporting his badge and a pocketful of even tinier pens and medical instruments. There’s… shading? Ugh, you can see the creases in the fabric.

“Umm… sure, I can go next,” you mumble.

It was just your luck, pulling Rafayel’s name out of that hat. Sheepishly, you move aside the cookbook you’d stood to guard your project from any prying eyes. Your gingerbread is nudged forwards.

“That’s me!” Rafayel exclaims.

“Yeah…” you confirm half-heartedly. “Sorry, I know it’s not great, but I—”

Lack the skill of a celebrity artist, or the steady hands of a cardiac surgeon? You have no idea which exact pool of self-pity your sentence was set on drowning within, but it doesn’t matter. Rafayel has plucked your gingerbread up for a closer look, and his smile is enormous. “This is amazing!”

“You don’t have to—”

“That’s my cardigan!” He’s crashing the pity party again. “And look at my eyes— the colours! This little guy is so handsome, yeah? You really did me justice, cutie. Look at him!”

He holds the gingerbread up to his face, trying to match its two-dimensional grin. He looks around for affirmation, and it’s just his luck, because is a single man at this table ever going to insult your hard work?

“The eyes are amazing,” Xavier enthuses. “Like the sky at sunset. Who knew my partner was so talented?”

“I did,” Rafayel chirps happily.

Xavier frowns. “No, it was rhetori— never mind.” He smiles at you. Rolls with it. “I knew too, by the way.”

“As did I,” Zayne adds.

Everyone looks at Sylus, who shrugs a shoulder and says, “It was up for debate.”

“Can we please move onto the next person?” you press. This is all too much attention. “Sylus, can you… please?”

He does like it when you beg, but he likes it even more when he can play knight in shining armour. “My pleasure, sweetie.”

For a man whose creative side is mostly indulged by vintage gun restorations, he reveals his gingerbread with a staggering amount of confidence. It’s placed at the centre of the kitchen island, where you all stare down at it. Its hair is snow-white, and its eyes: blood-red.

“That’s…” Zayne begins.

“That’s you, Sylus!” you take-over, voice shrill with betrayal. “You were supposed to say something if you picked yourself! And you— wait, what are…?” There are distinct lines over the gingerbread’s midriff. It dawns on you: “Are those abs?!”

Sylus shrugs again.

“They so are!” You snatch up the biscuit, standing to wave it in Sylus’s face like a crime-scene photo. “Where’s his shirt, huh?”

“He lost it.”

“Bullshit!” you snap. This gingerbread competition had come with its own set of rules, one of which was very clearly: “Nothing obscene! I said nothing obscene, Sylus!”  

He leans away from you with a tut. “It’s tasteful, sweetie. The artist will tell you.”

“The artist is staying out of this,” Rafayel murmurs, off to your side.

Sylus crosses his arms, regardless, as though his case has been made. You cross your arms too.

“Can I show you my gingerbread now?” Xavier asks, and his tone is deceivingly soft: a hand on your shoulder, pulling you back.

You release the tension in your body with a sigh, then set the gingerbread down so you can’t throw it at Sylus’s un-smug face (which he’s been very careful about.) “Of course, Xavier,” you smile, slinking back onto your stool. You can throw something at Sylus later. “Ooh, is it me? It has to be me, right?”

Xavier chuckles awkwardly. “It’s you. I don’t think it’s very good, though.”

“Show me!” you insist.

The final cookbook is removed, and Xavier unveils his hard work. You clamp a hand to your mouth.

You don’t have a single word for what you’re looking at— only laughter, and you can’t let yourself laugh, no matter what. If that gingerbread is you? Then it’s a you who’s been torn apart by Wanderers, at least seven consecutive times. Your face is a swirl of colours and features— you think Xavier must have tried to wipe it off to start again, more than once, but it hasn’t worked.

The gingerbread has been broken, too. Three of the four limbs, to be exact, and that you could forgive, but… did he have to use dark red icing to glue them back on? It drips out of the joins messily, almost making you wince.

Everyone is silent.

“A perfect likeness,” says Sylus.

You burst out laughing, and the moment you do, Rafayel’s right there with you. Even Sylus caves— it’s one of the most sincere laughs you’ve ever heard from him. There are tears in your eyes; you can’t help it. Zayne is the strongest of you, but even the tight line of his mouth quivers. He’s biting his lip.

But it’s fine. Xavier is laughing, too. “I said it wasn’t very good!”

“Xavier!” you wheeze. You can’t even look at him. Your stomach hurts. “What… what happened to me?!”

“What do you mean?” he practically giggles.

“What do I mean?” you repeat, and it tips you into another breathless bout of laughter. You go to point at the gingerbread— all the explanation you need— but it almost kills you. You really can’t breathe. After half a minute, you try again. “I look like I’ve been in an accident!”

“Here,” Rafayel grins, and he slides the Doctor Zayne gingerbread over to poor, suffering gingerbread you.

“Aww!” you smile, having finally caught your breath.

Wordlessly, Zayne retrieves his likeness— pulling it away from yours. You frown at him, as confused and wounded as Xavier apparently imagines you. “Even I have my limits,” the doctor shrugs.

That’s it. You’re gone again, your sides aching as your whole body shakes with laughter. It’s too much. Gods, it’s too much. You’re gonna need another minute.

…

“I can’t believe you made you.”

It’s been fifteen or so minutes, and you toy with Sylus’s gingerbread counterpart, pinching his hands between your thumbs and forefingers— making him walk (well, penguin waddle) across the kitchen island.

“Believe it, sweetie,” Sylus huffs with a smile.

“Is this really how you see yourself?”

Before you can walk the gingerbread any further, his creator plucks him up by his head, away from your reaching fingers. “It’s how I think you should see me,” he chuckles. He holds the gingerbread out to you. Wiggles it. “For your eyes only, kitten.”

“Except the other guys saw it—”

“Shhhh, shh shh!” In his haste to silence you, he almost pushes the gingerbread to your lips.

You glare at him. Complain from behind it: “Get your shirtless abs out of my face, Sylus.”

“Make me.”

You snatch the gingerbread, pinning it down on the counter. “Keep pushing your luck, Sy. Wanna see what’ll happen?”

He absolutely does, and his eyes glint with mirth as you reach for a near-empty bowl of crimson icing. You scrape some of it up with a discarded teaspoon, then let it drip generously over his gingerbread. It takes a few, long seconds to really cover him in it. To make him look as fatally tragic as gingerbread you.

“Here,” you say, dropping the spoon in a bowl with a satisfied clink. You hold out the gingerbread. “This’ll be you when I’m done with you.”

Sylus regards it for a moment, his eyebrow quirked. Then his eyes find your gingerbread likeness. “Want to see what you’ll look like when I’m done with you?”

His hand goes out for the bowl of red icing, except… it goes past the bowl of red icing, and lands on a tube of white icing instead. He holds it up with a smile.

“Inappropriate.”

The tube is swept out of his fingers, and he blinks at the empty space, legitimately surprised.

“It was snow, doctor,” he remarks bitterly, once he’s recovered from the second ambush of the evening. He glances over his shoulder. “From a snowball fight?”

“Sure it was,” Zayne mutters, already turning back to the bowl he’s washing in the sink.

Sylus is frowning, affronted, but the expression softens when you’re filling his gaze again. You: your hands on your mouth, so close to spilling laughter. “Oooooh,” you tease with a secretive sing-song voice, “you got in trouble!”

He wrinkles his nose like ‘trouble’ is an insult. It sets you off sniggering uncontrollably.

“What did I miss?”

It’s Xavier, back from the lounge.

“Nothing,” Sylus answers.

“He got in trouble!” you counteract with a not-at-all quiet whisper.  

You earn a glare from the criminal, and a little laugh from the hunter. “Third-strike trouble?” the latter enquires. He might have handcuffs on stand-by; it wouldn’t surprise you.

“Not yet,” you grin cheerfully.  

Zayne sets a plate on the drying rack. “Give it time.”

…

“I don’t think we have enough, sweetie,” Sylus quips, peeking over the stack of blankets you’ve piled high on his arms. 

What was it Rafayel said? High risk, high reward? You mercifully chuckle. Your arms are wrapped around three, plush cushions— the last of your sleepover supplies. Snacks? Are ready. Guests? Haven’t killed each-other yet. You toe open your bedroom door, shouldering the rest of the way through with your missing puzzle pieces of luxury.

“Oh, nice!” someone exclaims from the kitchen. Xavier is watching you, starry-eyed, and his cheeks are full; he’s midway through a cookie.

Sylus steps through the door behind you, issuing a faint noise of disgust. He sounds like he’s being attacked by a bug, so you turn around, ready to leap to the rescue. He’s stood within the door frame, eyes cast upwards to where a sprig of mistletoe hangs on the end of a string. It’s swaying gently; he must have caught his head on it. You frown, lips parted. He was with you the whole time you were looting your bedroom. When did he…? How did he…?

He looks down at you, the mistletoe still hovering above him. You raise an eyebrow, waiting for the inevitable joke, or the even more inevitable invitation. 

“I…’ he starts gingerly, “I didn’t…” 

Oh. He’s just as confused as you are, and it’s… really cute. He’s lost for words— the man who came here with not one, but four sprigs of mistletoe. The man who threatened your gingerbread with white icing. The man who’s spent the entire evening thinking about how he wants to be close to you.

Sylus laughs, but it’s full of nervousness. “It’s alright,” he says, “you don’t have to—”

You tilt him towards you, your hand on his shoulder and cushions around your feet. “Merry Christmas, Sy,” you murmur, pressing a kiss to his cheek. It’s warm on your lips.

His eyes flutter closed. “Merry Christmas,” he breathes, barely more than a whisper. 

You hum contentedly as you pull away from him. When his eyes reopen, they’re warm with a nostalgia you cannot explain, but you can feel, too— so inexplicably. His gaze is blood-red, but it makes you think of flowers. 

What a funny feeling. It strikes you a lot, nowadays, and not just with the man in front of you. 

Speaking of the others, you glance towards your lounge. Xavier is telling Zayne a story, and Rafayel is watching you from over the back of the sofa— turning away when you spot him. That’s one mystery solved. You collect the cushions from the floor, sparing Sylus a smile before you meander back to your party. The coffee table’s a banquet of sweet, sugary snacks, so you carefully skirt past it.

Xavier’s hands grab at air. You laugh and toss him a cushion. “Thanks,” he grins. 

“Here— your favourite.” Zayne is pointing at your freshly-filled mug, and you grin your own thank you as you settle down next to him. 

Sylus soon arrives too, handing out blankets, and for all the evening’s animosity, he gets a grateful smile for each. He sits down next to Xavier, and it’s odd, you know? You’ve slain Wanderers, saved lives with every person around you. You’ve seen them bleed and kill.

They’re all wrapping themselves up, like snuggly little Christmas presents. Xavier’s managed to collect another cushion— from Zayne, maybe?— and he’s practically building a fort on his side of the couch. Some of it infringes on Sylus’s space, and you notice him notice, but he doesn’t say a word. Oblivious, tucked under two blankets, Xavier’s already looking sleepy. 

Someone’s making less of an effort to get comfortable. On the other side of you, Rafayel sits, uncharacteristically quiet. He hasn’t met your eyes since you sat down. You remember him, watching you under the mistletoe from across the room, and the thought has you leaning in closer. 

“That was sweet of you,” you whisper, even though he disobeyed you. 

“Don’t know what you’re talking about,” he shrugs.

But he does, so you kiss his cheek, ever so fondly, with that funny feeling in your chest again. It’s the first time, but it doesn’t strike you as such. Uncharted waters, a foreign land— when have I been here before?

Rafayel has relaxed: sunken deep into the sofa and the security of your touch. You smile, pulling his blanket up higher around him— tighter around him— until he’s as much of a cocoon as everyone else. His lips curve with a smile of surrender, ever-willingly captured. Silly fish. 

You draw away from him, readjusting in your seat until you’re cuddled up next to Zayne. You don’t see the wink Rafayel shoots Sylus, or the look of begrudging respect in the latter’s red eyes. 

“Are you comfortable?” Zayne asks, head angling towards yours. 

Co-host to co-host. “Yeah.” You snuggle closer to him. “This is kinda perfect, isn’t it?” He feels cold, despite his Sylus-issued blanket, so you lend him part of yours.

“No,” he confers softly, distractedly. 

“No?”

“No.” He gives you a look, and you know it as intimately as the chill of his hands and the warmth of his heart. His ‘I know something that you don’t’ look. Sure enough, he says: “I think it’s missing something.” 

On the other sofa, Xavier is beaming at you, having caught onto your conversation. It’s suspicious— harmless conspiracy, surprise-party sort of suspicious, but your pulse still picks up. 

“Close your eyes,” Zayne instructs. 

And you do, without question. Darkness, yes, but you’re under his care, aren’t you? There’s no anxiousness in your excitement, just trust for the man who was looking out for you long before he was your doctor. Your hands are over your eyes and you’re younger, again, playing hide-and-seek, again.

Zayne’s is a familiarity you can place. A nostalgia built on memories, not reveries.

Something icy touches your hand, then melts without any resistance. 

“Open,” Zayne prompts, leaning against you to stir you. 

Your apartment has changed again. The lights are all out, save for the fairy lights. The spectrum of colours flicker from the walls and the tree, catching on tiny, white specs in the air. Snowflakes are drifting down, impossibly. Falling, dancing— maybe a bit of both. You look up and some land on your face, cold with their kisses. You giggle in delight. 

Everyone’s gaze is on the ceiling: sapphire, emerald, amethyst, ruby. It ought to be dark. Instead, an entire night sky fills the space above you, scattered with thousands of stars. Every pinprick is deliberate. Meticulously placed. There are constellations— infinite patterns that transcend every life you might’ve lead, and every life you’ll ever lead (if you believe in that sort of thing.)

Xavier glances at you, and you forgo the spell of his masterpiece so that you can glance back. Snowflakes are in his hair, dusting him with sparkles. He smiles in a way you think could defy lifetimes, too. 

“This is… really something,” Sylus says, and there’s not a hint of sarcasm. 

It’s everything. The stars, brighter for darkness. The snow, only novel in warmth. These things don’t always work— they’ll undo each-other, overpower each-other, but there’s an ultimate balance, in-between every conflict. An occasional harmony, and it’s… 

Perfect. 

Rafayel scoots close to you. “Was this authorised?” he whispers. 

You look over to the point board, where there are first strikes beneath Zayne and Xavier’s names, and you don’t know how long they’ve been there. 

“No,” you laugh tenderly. “No, it wasn’t.”

[felassan]

David Gaider on Cassandra (the last of these retrospective character threads), under a cut for length:

"This is the last of the (major) characters I wrote during my time on Dragon Age. I could go into others, and considered moving onto Stray Gods... but I feel like fewer would be interested, and I honestly can't keep up the pace. So let's make this the last, for now. So, yeah. Cassandra. We knew early on that Cassandra would come into DAI as a companion, along with Varric, that this was part of what DA2 set up for the sequel. Now, I'd written Cassandra's short scenes in DA2, yes, but I wasn't her writer for DAI. Initially, she was Jennifer Hepler's character. By mid-project, in fact, Cassandra was more or less fully written. Jennifer did a great job - solid character, solid quest. The sticking point, it turned out, was her romance. Now, to be fair, Jennifer told me straight up when we began that writing romance wasn't her forte, but she'd give it a go. The problem with the romance as she wrote it wasn't in its execution but more a clash between the character as Jennifer envisioned her and the requirements of her being a romance. See, I mentioned previously that a romance arc inherently limits the kinds of stories you can tell with a companion. Many responses I got can be summed up as "lol skill issue", but consider this: a companion romance isn't a fic you can just throw up on AO3. It's an investment of a lot of resources. If a companion has one, most of their resources need to be devoted to it - it's not "now let's ALSO add a romance"."

"That means it needs to take priority in who they are as a character and their arc. What's more, they need to be *appealing* to a big chunk of the player base - or at least someone we can imagine being broadly appealing, anyway. Thankfully, there are still many many stories this can accommodate. 😊 This, however, wasn't one of those. Was Cassandra a fascinating character? Absolutely. Her romance, though... Well, Jennifer DID warn me. She'd written Cassandra as a serious, self-righteous, pious woman who put the Inquisitor on a messianic pedestal. Romancing her meant changing her view of you. You did this by being... pushy. Jennifer didn't mean it to, I'm sure, but sometimes it came off as, at best, negging. At worst, a bit harassy. And Jennifer would have fixed it. This was a 1st draft, and the issues - while serious - were something a skilled writer like her could handle. No problem. Thing is, Jennifer left. You may not remember, but this was around the time a bunch of GamerGate dudes decided Jennifer was somehow responsible for ALL of BioWare's faults. Oh, the power she wielded! She, a writer, could even command the combat Bio made! The result was a LOT of ugly harassment. 😞 Is this why she left? You'd have to ask her, but it undoubtedly didn't help. The important thing is, she left - and there was nobody as senior nor as superhumanly fast as her to take over any unfinished work. This is where Patrick Weekes comes in: a solid, senior writer who could fill her shoes."

"It was great timing - not only did Cassandra need a writer, I'd slowly fallen more and more behind. It was clear by that point that I'd never be able to write Dorian AND Cole AND Solas as planned. They needed to pick up two. And I let them choose the ones who interested them, like all my writers. Patrick taking Solas was no surprise, and while I had Big Plans for Solas in the future I knew at least he'd be in good hands. I was reeeeaaaally hoping Patrick would then pick Cassandra... but they wanted Cole. My baby. Who I created in Asunder. I grumped, but Patrick clearly loved the character. They had ideas for Cole which... yeah yeah, sounded cool. Fiiine. 😅 Now I had to figure out what *I* was going to do with Cassandra. We couldn't move the romance to someone else, all the other female characters were well underway, and I didn't know the character well enough to fix her with tweaks. That meant a re-write. I didn't WANT to erase all that good work, but I needed to start from scratch. Yet how? A pious, self-righteous character was already a risk in terms of romantic appeal. There are only a small number of traits sorta considered universally unappealing but they're on that list. In this instance, Cassandra already being a known character helped. I came across a webcomic (by aimo, I think? AHH I wish I could find it now) that made a joke about Cassandra reading Varric's books. Off-hand, no basis for it, but funny. 😆 And I thought: YES. THAT'S IT. THAT'S WHAT I'M MISSING."

"I sat down and wrote the "fangirl" scene, just to test it out. Everyone loved it, and it served to change my image of who Cassandra was - a view of the inside, at the idealistic and awkward passion she felt, for so many things... AND the Maker. "Yes," I thought. "I could fall in love with this." Who knew Cassandra could be funny? Not anyone, coming out of DA2, yet here we were. It worked so well and her voice came so easily. Miranda Raison was game ofc, and amazing. Though Caroline did gripe that, if we ever met more Nevarrans THAT accent meant we'd have the Tali Problem all over again. 😅 Cassandra's romance is burned into my brain as the time when we THE most awkward conversation with the animators ever. See, that moment during the sex scene on the picnic blanket when she leans back and... there were suddenly these strategically-placed candles, juuuust covering the Sordid Bits. Thing is, they were so obviously placed just to do that. Plus, we'd already decided to do full nudity in DAI, hadn't we? WHY WERE THEY EVEN THERE? Turns out, the nudity thing was still pretty new to the team. They'd forgotten and put the candles there almost as a reflex. So prudish. So Canadian. 😂 I do find it kind of funny that, these days, what I mostly hear about Cassandra is from female fans upset at me because she wasn't a lesbian option. I mean, right? Who wouldn't want that? Technically not my decision, but I guess I WAS behind the companions having set preferences so... fair enough?"

"Some of them do take it to an entitled place, though, like Cassandra *should* have been a lesbian. Why? Because she looks like one, apparently, and that that's a bit of stereotyping which feels... odd? But it's not as if lesbian players are spoiled for choice left and right, so again: fair enough. It did lead to the best end credits VO perhaps ever, and overall I'm pretty happy with how Cassandra panned out. Things never end up like you expect, right? But such is game dev lyfe. 🥸🖖 Did you know Cassandra was THE most-romanced DAI character, by a good margin? Least, by a good margin? Dorian."

[source thread]

User: "Did you have any hand in her writing for Dawn of the Seeker?" David Gaider: "No, none. Nobody at BioWare had any hand in Dawn of the Seeker, outside of maybe Mike approving the script or direction? Only he could say for sure." [source]

User: "Was Miranda a specific casting choice by anyone on the team (similar to your picks for Merrill/Fenris/Solas), or was she simply a lucky find? I loved Miranda on the BBC series "Spooks", so I was very pleasantly surprised to learn she voiced one of my favourite DA characters" David Gaider: "I don’t remember how Miranda was cast. Auditioned, I expect, and she had a good “steely warrior voice” which is surprisingly uncommon among actresses. The accent she made up was all her, as well." [source]

User: "What's the Tali Problem?" David Gaider: "When Tali was the only Quarian, the actress doing a made-up accent was fine. Once there were others… do we get them all to mimic her? That’s a tall order!" [source]

User: "I'd say Solas is the most popular nowaday, but you need to be such a specific race/gender combo + most straight guys wouldn't go for him, i get hes not on top of the list, but I'd have expected Josephine over Cass." David Gaider: "You can’t go by how fans online talk about playing the game. There is almost zero correlation between the playstyles of the vocal hardcore and the masses." [source]

User: "I was a Dorianmancer. The cut content in Trespasser DLC was sad to read, it definitely felt short/abrupt for Dorianmancers. Anyway to share what was cut at all?" David Gaider: "I don’t know what was cut out of the conversation, as I never played it. I just heard about it after the fact." [source]

User: "Those end credits are truly incredible. Do you remember who wrote them? I'm guessing a combination of Mary Kirby & you?" David Gaider: "I wrote them, but I recall the entire team kind of took part in brainstorming the pieces of it." [source]

User: "I’m very curious- Do you know what direction you would have taken Cole and his story if you’d kept him?" David Gaider: "It's hypothetical at this point, but I suspect I would have been less willing to lose the serial killer aspect... or, at least, would have made that transition occur as part of his arc in DAI. Yet that's easy to say from this side of the divide. Who knows, really?" [source]

User: "With Cassandra you created one of the best characters in DA history." David Gaider: "Personally, my favorite response of hers is where she gets mocked for loving romance and she comes back with a retort about how it's a strength - how loving something and striving for the ideal takes courage. To me, that's central to her core." [source]

User: "inquiry: did you not write any of the Awakening characters?" David Gaider: "I wrote Anders, Justice, and Nathaniel in Awakening - but it was such a hurried project, my memories of it are pretty much a blur. "Yes, I worked on that" is almost all I can say about it, I'm afraid." [source]

[kopilot-pop]

[New Jeans x Oldest Member! Reader] - #3

-imagine.

Summary: Silly little fics of you and the gorls. You’re basically the tired father figure in their lives.

Warning(s): Cursing, car accident?, bribing a worker?,!crack humor, Hanni has a stalker, you get violent, etc.

A/N: This is like really unserious lmao. I wrote it really lighthearted. Also, this was written over the course of the whole Ador vs Hybe situation. So please understand I’m slowly becoming more unhinged as the story goes.

———————————————————————

#1

You’re strong. I mean physically strong. All of New Jeans, hell, ADOR knows that.

Oh where’s Y/n unnie?; She’s out for a jog.

Unnie is your hand okay?; Yeah, I just had a sparring match today.

That’s just a part of your life.

Fans adore this about you, the girls adore this about you, and today, you’ve come to appreciate this fact too.

Especially when a stalker decided to show his face again at the airport.

It’s been about 2 months since you’ve last seen the man. He went viral on the news (by news I mean Dispatch) for being Hanni’s stalker.

The last time you met him - oh, it was ugly.

He snuck into a performance venue disguised as a staff member. You were the one that caught him lurking near the MC waiting room.

‘Hanni’s supposed to be in there.’

Five. seconds.

That’s all it took for Hanni’s scream to pierce your ear.

The stalker barged into the room, grabbed the girl, and attempted to drag her towards the exit.

You don’t remember much after that scene.

Actually you might remember punching his face something and throwing something him across the wall, but that doesn’t really matter does it?

It mattered alot to Dispatch, who got a hold of the security footage, and decided to share it for the world to see.

The whole situation cause alot of debates of “Oh he’s a stalker. He deserved it. Good job Y/n!” versus “Wow, you didn’t have to get that violent Y/n.”, and in the end, the company decided to put you on a short hiatus and a long scolding from the producer.

Currently, you guys are standing across a crosswalk in front of the airport. The six of you are scheduled to perform in Paris in a few days and decided to get there early to settle in. You all planned a short vacation before having a whole week of dancing after dancing.

So imagine your surprise to see the dirty little freak right between the paparazzis - with a broken camera, might I add - staring at your group.

After acknowledging his presence, you quickly turned to Hanni - hoping that she didn’t notice him yet.

Unfortunately, you were too late.

Hanni’s body was slightly shaking and you could see the fear in her eyes as she stares directly towards the area where the stalker is.

Instinctively, you rushed to her side, and held her waist with your arm.

“I’m not letting him get to you, bub.”

“I.. oh you saw him too?”

“Mm-hm, and I’ll sucker-punch him if he tries to touch you again, alright?”

Hanni giggles, “Nooo, I don’t want you to be stuck in our dorms again!”

“I think it’ll be worth it if I get to break his nose this time, no?”

Minji - overhearing your conversation - butts in.

“Please don’t break anybody’s nose today unnie.”

“I’ll try my best.”

Minji gives you a skeptical look and you give her an innocent smile.

When the crosswalk light turns green, the whole group starts to walk through the group of people, as security tries to make enough room for you guys to pass.

The six of you were just about to manage through the gates when Hanni’s pained scream cuts through the air. You snap your head towards your right to see the same stalker gripping a fist-full of her hair.

And in just a millisecond, a loud crack replaces the girl’s scream.

The paparazzis’ cameras went wild with flashes - all trying to capture how you grabbed the man by his collar and slammed your fist right into his nose. Your pupils were blown wide, piercing right through the stalker writhing on the floor.

“Y/N!!”

Minji was the only one quick enough to snap out of her shock and grab onto you before you could attempt to break anymore of his bones..

Yeah, guess you’re not making it to Paris.

———————————————————————

#2

“UNNIE!! Look at this!!”

Danielle happily skips over to the rack filled to the brim with different bunny plushies. You, her and Haerin all decided to go to a state fair that was happening only an hour away from the hotel.

Technically, you were dragged here by the two of them, but that doesn’t matter.

You watched as the girls looked through the pile of plushies while sipping in your smoothie.

‘Is this what parenthood feels like..’

When the two of them finally chose a bunny they liked, they simultaneously looked over to you… expectingly..

“What. Wait. I already bought us food?”

They nod.

“And hats, I bought us three hats.”

They nod, again.

They’re now directly under your nose, giving you those big puppy eyes. Sweat drips down your back, and it’s definitely not because of the Texas heat.

With a exasperated sigh, you reach into your back pocket and take out your card.

“Excuse me, how much for two of those plushies?”

“Oh, so sorry, but those aren’t for sale. You have to win 50 tickets to win two of them!”

The worker gives you a smile and continues helping out a family near the shooting range. When you turn around, Danielle has a clear pout on her face.

“Aww.. I thought I could buy them..”

“Not you, I could buy them.”

“Potato po-tah-to.”

For a moment you think of the choices you have. It’s either waste cash on a rigged shooting range, give up on the plushes, and.. oh.

“Can the two of you get wait in line for the bucket of cookies over there? Here-”

You hand over a 20$ bill. Danielle squeals happily and Haerin finally has a tiny smile on her face. The older girl grabs her hand and runs towards the stand.

As soon as they turn their backs on you, you slither over to the worker again.

“I need the plushies.”

“Wha- oh it’s you again. Look man, we have a policy that we can’t sell the prizes for c-cash.. wha..what is that..”

You quickly tuck a 100 dollar bill into his front pocket and give him an innocent smile.

“Dude, this isn’t a drug deal, I- ugh, fine, I’ll grab you the fucking plushies”

“Thank you :D”

You carry the two bunny plushies in your arms and a giant teddy bear the man gave you in return for a signature to give to his sister.

You awkwardly walk towards your groupmates while balancing the giant furball on your back.

“Y/n unnie!!! Oh my god! What is that?!”

Danielle looks clearly surprised, but you can tell she’s having a hard time containing her smile. Haerin’s trying her best to help you with the teddy bear.

“I.. uh…-holyshitthisisheavy- I hit the jack pot! Yeah, jackpot….”

You give them a toothy grin, not noticing the group of people taking photos of the three of you, and definitely not realizing the absolute fever Twitter is having over the pictures.

———————————————————————

#3

“I’m telling you guys, nothing’s gonna happen-”

A loud scream cuts off Minji as a ghost jumps out from the wardrobe.

Hanni and Danielle screams louder than the ghost, and runs into your arms in fear. You turn around to see Minji in the same situation as you - just with Hyein.

“Nevermind…” Minji rolls her eyes as the actor scurries off to a different room.

But her nonchalant behavior doesn’t last long when something under the bed grabs her ankle. She screams and - quite literally - jumps into your arms.

“WHY DID YOU CHOOSE A HAUNTED HOUSE FOR YOUR BUCKET LIST.”

The moment you let down a wide-eyed Minji, Hanni grabs your collar and shakes you; Pretty sure she’s trying to get revenge, but having absolutely no impact.

“Ack- I thought it would be fun..”

“FUN?! YOU THINK GHOSTS AND DEAD PEOPLE ARE FUN???!!!”

While Hanni growls at you with tears in her eyes, Haerin bravely opens the next door, only to be met with a doll dropped right in front of her face.

The shock causes her to let out a scream-

‘My ears are ringing.’

which you never expected from her - and run towards you to use your body as a shield.

“ALRIGHT, you guys stand behind me, and I’ll open all the doors, okay? That way I’m the one being threatened by the next ghoul or whatever…”

The girls nod their heads in unison. Hanni finally lets go of your collar to grip onto your left arm.

You cautiously kick open several doors, trying to find the exit, and on the third try you finally find another long corridor with a glowing exit sign at the end. The 6 of you slowly walk towards it but freezes when the buzzing sound of a chainsaw starting echoes from behind.

You’re the only one brave enough to turn around and see the clown standing in the middle of the room you guys just left.

“Okay, don’t panic but there’s a clown-”

The girls scream in unison as they sprint towards the exit like their life depends on it. You follow suit, and use your body to bust down the last door.

The whole group falls toward the ground together, and the younger girls naturally grab onto you, tightly closing their eyes in fear.

“Um… Congrats…?”

When you see the employee standing behind the counter, you sigh in relief that the haunted house is over.

“Guys, we escaped the house.”

They finally detach from you to take a look around their surroundings.

“Oh! Well that was nothing.” Hanni scoffs confidently, causing everyone around her to let out a deep sigh.

———————————————————————

#4

“We got into a car accident.”

“WHAT?!”

You jump up from the bed - almost dropping your phone - and check the contact name again.

“Yeah, I think Haerin unnie has a concussion.”

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT.”

You quickly put the phone on speaker and fumble around to find your jacket.

“Yeah.. so since Haerin unnie got her license we decided to take your car out for a drive..”

“Wait, wait- MY CAR?!”

“Yeah, you said we can take it out whenever we want? Anyways, we decided to go to the beach… but the road was really messy, I think my phone is glitched, unnie.”

“HUH?!”

“We kinda went down this hill… blah blah blah… we hit a telephone poll- blah blah….”

“Oh my god.”

You rush out the door to the location Hyein has told you. When you arrive, you spot the girls and your BMW M3 that you recently acquired after begging your uncle for 3 months to sell it to you.

With a quick glance you can tell that - thankfully - the car is only a little scratched up, so you immediately turn your attention to the girl curled up in the driver’s seat.

Haerin’s head is against the handle with both of her arms covering her face. Her knuckles are almost white.

“Hey, hey, you okay?”

The only response you receive is a tiny groan from the younger girl.

“Hyein said you might have a concussion? Can you look at me sweetheart?”

“She’s been like this the whole time.” Hyein chimes in.

“The car can be fixed, it’s fine, just a scratch. But it’s more important to me if you’re fine, bub.”

With that a few seconds of silence passes and you finally get a tiny ‘I’m okay’ from Haerin.

“Alright then, let’s move you to the backseat so I can drive us to the hospital, okay? Hyein, get in the passenger seat.”

“Hell yeah! Shotgun!!”

You carry Haerin to the backseat, but as you try to get her seatbelt on, you finally notice the frown on her face.

“Haerin, I’m not disappointed you guys took my car out. I told you guys you’re free to do that. However, I am upset that you guys weren’t careful and got hurt. Okay? We can talk about that after we check if the two of you are fine.”

“What- me too?”

“YES, YOU TOO. YOU WERE ALSO IN THE CAR!”

Hyein pouts at your disbelief. You sigh and give Haerin a peck on her forehead, and hurry to your seat to get to the hospital.

“Put your seatbelt on bub, I’m speeding to the ER.”

“W-wait, you just told us to be caref-AHHH!!”

———————————————————————

A/N: This was fun to write lol.

[crescenthistory]

your last animagus fic was so sweet! it even made some ideas popped in my mind. i was thinking about feisty (gn) reader being a crow animagus accompanying barty into his mischief, which could be scaring the skittles or pranking people in general. if you could write this, it would be wonderful 💞

(fun fact: crows can mimic sounds such as ambience noise or even human voice, this is so amazing and a bit scary, imagine encounter one while you walk in the woods AAAAAKXNSM!!! i love them so much, thx for reading me yapp xx)

hi lovely<33 thank YOU for yapping to me, i find it very endearing and entertaining 🤲 people who are passionate about what they love>>>>

now, i personally don't think i would be able to write this as a full-length fic, as pranking and mischief is not reallyyyy within my toolbox BUT this is very cute so i'm giving you some belated headcanons 🫂 if anyone's able/willing to write a longer version, please do share with the class and tag me!!

i present to you my thoughts of crow!animagus!reader x barty:

i imagine you become an animagus before you and barty get together

(because if you wanted to do it while the two of you were friends/dating he would INSIST on doing the transformation process with you)

and i think deciding when your relationship is at the point where you can/should divulge that part of yourself would be difficult to pinpoint

so what happens is that you would be laying on the floor beside each other in the astronomy tower, stargazing together. a date of sorts, in the way every second you spend with barty somehow feels like a date as he is fully, wholly dedicated to you.

the later it got, the more you two would switch between genuinely trying to find and remember constellations and just goofing around

those type of late night conversations where you seem to get to know someone 100x more in just a few hours than you otherwise could over the spans of months

asking each other increasingly deep questions

"tell me something about you no one else knows"

when else would you get the perfect opportunity to reveal your animagus status to your boyfriend?

stupidly, you feared his reaction. would he be upset with you hiding it for so long? would he think your animagus form was silly? would he look at you differently?

but when i tell you this man shrieked with excitement

"show me, show me, show me"

when you turn into a crow and fly around him in circles, he genuinely would jump up excitedly and twirl in the same direction you're flying so that his eyes never have to leave your form, laughing and screaming

the only thing on his mind would be how spectacular and remarkable you are, excitement and love filling any space that the hostility you feared might have fostered

not to mention; "that's bloody badass, treasure"

you would land carefully on his shoulder and barty would scoop you up close to his body, almost squishing you and making you squeak

"we're gonna have to perfect the art of cuddling with crows," he would say gravely

barty, the secret academic weapon and swot that he is, would SO do his due diligence with research immediately upon the discovery

we're talking library trips, tomes and scrolls purchases, books upon books of muggle literature on crows and wizard literature on animagi that he chases through faster than you could imagine

when he learns of crows being able to mimic noises, including human voices, his mind floods with ideas

"oh, we are going to have fun baby"

that's how you start accompanying him into his many tirades and mischief

most of the time it is just as a companion, the crow sitting on his shoulder as he runs around the castle wreaking havoc

it adds to barty's general intimidating aura and the reputation that just barely proceeds him — the crazy guy with the facial piercings, acid green streaks in his hair, punkish style, chokers and a volatile wand now also has a crow with him everywhere? hell no, people steer clear of him

it doesn't help that many students swear he talks to the crow and seems to hold an entire conversation with it, based solely on its body language and occasional caws

"i swear to bloody merlin, the crow looked at me when i spoke badly of junior. it's like it understood, some human-like capabilities or what not, fucking scary."

it doesn't take long before you become a more active partner in his shenanigans, though

you will call out people's names to get them to enter a room barty needs them in (because let's be real, if barty called for them, nobody would be stupid enough to fall for it and go to him)

you deliver letters and packages for him, you caw behind first years so that they jump in fear, you borrow people's clips and rings and pens

poor regulus and evan get the most shit from you among the skittles, while dorcas finds the most amount of entertainment through it

i imagine it's through your animagus form that the skittles learn that when pandora talks to animals she actually does understand them -> you two have lengthy conversations, much to everyone's eventual chagrin

and while the skittles of course all learn you're an animagus, no one else in the castle does

(though i imagine the marauders have their strong suspicions from early on)

barty was already showering you in gifts — "my father's outrages amounts of money should be put to good" — but now he has taken it upon himself to get you anything and everything shiny he sees

"you're a literal crow and i'm your dutiful partner. i have to contribute to the nest."

(mind you, this would likely be a thing even before he ever sees you seek out something shiny while in animagus form; he just assumes)

ironically, barty starts behaving like a crow himself in how he seeks out shiny trinkets for you

and while you try and tell him you don't have those instincts when outside of your animagus form... you actually really do and you revel in the love and attention

after a while, i do believe he would attempt to become an animagus too

honestly, he would begin getting on your case about it every single day from finding out. same way he would immediately learn his s/o's native language imo — he needs to be included.

especially if regulus is a cat animagus in this universe, because his two favourite people simply cannot have something in common that he is excluded from. this man is the epitome of fomo

my default animagus form for barty is a raccoon, but i think he would also make a lot of fun as a bat animagus which fits perfect with you as a crow

can you imagine, just you two flying around on school grounds and later on in your neighbourhood when you move in together?

the crow and the bat<3(shit crazy boy who loves them)

[luvergirl-866]

something like love

part - 4

pairing - paige bueckers x azzi fudd

word count - 5.3k

c/w - language, small amount of angst, some hurt/comfort. also kinda problematic paige but i get her

a/n - guess who’s endo cramps are killing her!! that’s right, me! fml. as usual this is unedited but i’ll come back to edit later! also, i changed paige’s step-dad’s name from tim to dean because i remembered that azzi’s dad is named tim and i felt like that would be confusing lol. also, thank you so much for all the fic recs i got! i’m so excited to start working on them :3

They’re ten minutes into the thirty-minute car ride and nobody has said a word. Country music is playing quietly over the radio, and Dean and Amy keep glancing at each other. But the awkward silence is deadly.

Nobody spoke earlier, either. After Paige dropped the bomb. It was silent for a good minute before Dean had coughed loudly and turned back to the car, getting wordlessly into the driver’s seat. Amy stared at them for another minute or so, giving them no clue as to what was going on in her head other than her ears, which rapidly turned bright red. Finally, she’d shook her head and said, “We will talk about this when we get home,” before following her husband into the car.

As soon as they were both out of hearing range, Paige had sagged, and Azzi’d looked over at her, concerned. Usually, she’d lay a hand on her arm but she wasn’t sure if Paige wanted to be touched, especially by her, so instead she’d said, “Remember, we can leave anytime.”

Paige had nodded stiffly. And then, without looking at Azzi, she’d gotten into the car as well, leaving the door open for Azzi to follow suit.

And now they’re on the road, Paige and Azzi sitting in the back seat like two little kids in trouble. Azzi wants to go on her phone to avoid the awkwardness but her parents raised her to be polite, no matter the circumstances, so here she sits, stiff and awkward while she rides in this car that smells new and fancy and she hates it.

Chancing a glance over, Azzi sees that Paige is still staring out the window, the same thing she’s been doing the whole car ride, and Azzi hates that, too, because Paige only ever gets quiet when she’s bone-tired or truly upset. And Paige got a pretty good nap on the plane.

Based off the way she acted to Azzi’s words before they got on the road, Azzi’s pretty sure she’s doing that thing where she shuts people out because she’s mad or on the verge of tears or thinking too hard. And when she does this she can get mean, because she’s trying to protect herself, and it comes out all wrong.

She’s always done this, been reluctant to open up about the hard stuff, shut out the people who care about her. She and Azzi have talked about it a lot. She once admitted that Azzi was the first person to get her to actually talk about her feelings. But despite Azzi’s way with Paige, and despite the fact that they just get each other in a way no one else ever has, they still have their flaws. Azzi still doesn’t always know the right thing to say. And Paige still gets mean.

This fact keeps Azzi glued to her seat, thinking sidling closer and trying to comfort her best friend would only end badly. Azzi acts like she has a tough skin but often, the things Paige says when she gets like this cut deep, and it ends with both of them hurt. She’s scared to add a fight between the two of them onto whatever will surely go on with Paige and her parents later. So she stays put, even though every bone in her body is telling her to make Paige better.

Azzi has only managed this for maybe five minutes when she glances over again and notices that this time, Paige’s hand is splayed over the middle seat, fingers tapping anxiously, almost like she’s subconsciously reaching over. And that sight alone is enough to get Azzi sliding over, moving Paige’s hand so she doesn’t sit on it. Dean looks at her through the rearview, but Azzi pretends not to notice.

Paige doesn’t look over when Azzi settles in beside her. But she does reach blindly for her hand before taking it and placing it in her own lap, playing with the fingers nervously. Azzi breathes in relief. Paige hasn’t rejected her outright—she can’t be too upset. At least not yet.

They sit like that for the remainder of the ride.

When they pull into the driveway, Paige gives Azzi’s hand a squeeze before subtly shaking herself out and exiting the car. Azzi follows, afraid to be alone with Paige’s parents for even a second.

Before Paige can close the door, Amy calls, “Bring your bags into your room, Paige. And when you’re done come down and talk to us in the kitchen.” There’s a weighted pause. “Alone.”

Paige doesn’t answer, just slams the door shut. Azzi winces.

Azzi doesn’t say anything while Paige opens the trunk, or when she starts aggressively pulling their things out, or even when she slams the trunk shut. No, Azzi keeps her mouth shut, wanting to allow her best friend to seethe in peace, but when Paige slams into her shoulder when she passes her, Azzi doesn’t want to let it slide. “Ow! Paige, what the fuck?”

“Get your bags,” Paige responds gruffly.

Okay, so it’s gonna be one of those times. Perfect.

Despite not wanting to, Azzi does as she’s told, gathering her bags and following Paige to the front porch. She tries not to think about how usually Paige would’ve carried her things for her.

Paige opens the door without a word and they walk inside. The house is nice, open, smells of cedarwood. Paige doesn’t give Azzi a chance to look around, though, instead walking briskly to the staircase, lugging her shit upstairs with impressive strength, and Azzi thanks God she’s in such good shape because she’s practically jogging by the time they arrive at a room at the end of the hall.

“Paige—“ Azzi starts to stay, but Paige cuts her off by throwing her own backpack off her shoulder and dropping her suitcases, as if she’s trying her hardest to make as much a ruckus as possible.

Azzi places her things much more nicely on her usual side of the bed, eyeing Paige cautiously the entire time. It’s the only reason she’s able to catch her before she leaves, anticipating her movements just like she does on the court and darting between her best friend and the door, blocking her.

For the first time in nearly an hour, Paige looks her in the eye, and there’s fire there. “Move, Azzi.”

“No.”

“God,” Paige sighs, “seriously, don’t piss me off. Get outta my way.”

“No, Paige,” Azzi repeats, keeping her feet planted.

Paige stares at her and then shakes her head. “Why are you being so fuckin’ annoying?”

“Don’t,” Azzi says, trying to stop her before she gets too fired up, but it’s already started.

“No, Azzi, you don’t,” Paige snaps. “I knew you were gonna get like this, do your fuckin’ peace and love shit that you think will solve everyone’s fucking problems.”

Azzi swallows hard. It’s been years since Paige went on a rampage like this, and she opens her mouth to stop her, but is quickly interrupted.

“It doesn’t solve anything, dawg. It actually makes shit worse, because it’s so motherfucking annoying having you acting like everything’s fine when you don’t even know.” Paige shakes her head, taking a step towards her. “And that’s the thing, is you really don’t know but you wanna pretend like you do. You don’t know what it’s like to have your mom fuckin’ leave you for some fuckass guy, for her to have new kids outta state and raise them to be hateful just like her. Just like him.”

At this point, Azzi has tears in her eyes, and she attempts desperately to swallow them down. “Did you forget that my dad fucking left me when I was a baby? I’ve never even fucking talked to him, Paige. He doesn’t want shit to do with me.”

“That’s not the same and you know it.” Paige sends her a withering glare, so different from the way she usually looks at Azzi. “You have Tim. You have your mom and your brothers and they all love you so fucking much.”

“You have your dad!” Azzi responds, throwing her hands in the air. “You have Drew, you have Alora!” A tear escapes, against her will, and she wipes it furiously away. “You have me, Paige,” she says, more quietly now. “I love you so fucking much. So you don’t get to take this shit out on me and say mean things to hurt my feelings. That’s not—it’s not fair.”

As soon as she sees the tears welling in Azzi’s eyes, Paige softens, her shoulders slumping, eyes turning on her with guilt rather than venom. “Az, don’t cry.”

For some reason, this makes Azzi more mad, and she turns away to face the door, always having hated crying in front of others. “Well if you say mean shit to me, I’m gonna cry, Paige,” she mumbles, though there’s not much fire to her weak, shaky tone.

“Hey, no, you’re right,” Paige reaches for Azzi’s shoulder, trying to turn her around, but the tears have started now and they’re not going to stop anytime soon so Azzi stays turned firmly away. “Azzi, I’m sorry, I didn’t—“ Paige cuts herself off on a sigh. Her hand falls off Azzi’s shoulder, and for a second Azzi thinks she’s going to walk away, but then a pair of arms wrap tenderly around her waist and Paige’s chin is wresting on her shoulder. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have—I was wrong for that, I shouldnt’ve said any of that shit.” When Azzi doesn’t respond, instead burying her face in her hands to try and hide what she’s sure is an ugly cry, Paige squeezes her tighter. “Azzi, please don’t cry, I’m really sorry. Fuck, I’m sorry, for real. I didn’t mean any of it, I was just so scared about my parents and I took it out on you, I fucked up.”

Azzi nods into her hands, taking a deep breath to try and stop the embarrassing flow of emotion. “I know, Paige,” she tries, but it comes out sort of as a whimper and this only makes Paige circle around to stand in front of her, full-on hugging her now, burying her face in her neck and rubbing her back soothingly.

They’re silent for another moment before Paige says, “I’m serious, Az. I didn’t mean any of it.”

Azzi knows this, fundamentally, but there’s still a part of her that sort of cracked at hearing her best friend tell her that she was annoying, that her efforts to help always fall flat. “You shouldn’t have said it, then,” she stutters, letting Paige hold her close even as her face doesn’t come out of its hiding spot.

“I know, I know, I shouldn’t have. You’re the only person who can ever make me feel better and I—fuck. Azzi, I’m sorry, I can’t believe—I never wanna hurt you.” Paige lifts her head out of her neck to nuzzle into Azzi’s hair, pressing a kiss to the spot just behind her ear. “Never wanna make you cry.” She plants another kiss there, and Azzi’s breath hitches. From the crying or from something else, she doesn’t know.

Sighing shakily, Azzi finally pulls her head out of her hands to look up at Paige, placing her hands at her chest almost as if she’s about to push her away. She’s sure her mascara is ruined by now but she can’t bring herself to care too much. “It really hurt when you shoved me outside, too.”

A pained expression flits over Paige’s face, and she nods, looking almost sick. “Fuck. I’m—I’m sorry, Azzi. I’m so sorry. Is your arm okay? Does it still hurt?”

Azzi can’t take the guilty look on Paige’s face and shakes her head no. It doesn’t seem to relieve much of anything.

Breathing deeply, Paige closes her eyes and then leans her forehead against Azzi’s, bringing her hands up from her waist to stroke over her tear-stained cheeks. “I’m sorry, baby,” she whispers, and Azzi’s knows that the nickname wasn’t a slip-up this time, wasn’t just a habit from their pretending. “I’m really fuckin’ sorry.”

And with that, Azzi isn’t mad anymore. Her feelings are still hurt and the things Paige said are still going to replay in her head for quite some time, but at least for now, Azzi just can’t be mad. Because Paige is going through something she could never imagine going through.

“I’m sorry, too,” Azzi breathes, and Paige rears back, but before she can protest, Azzi says, “about your parents. About this whole…situation.” She looks down at her hands on Paige’s chest, and, deciding she won’t be needing to push her away anymore, she slides them up to her shoulders. “It’s shitty and you’re right, I don’t know what it’s like to be in your position.” She shrugs, swallowing back the last couple tears that threaten to fall, trying to regain at least some of her composure. “I’m going to be here for you, okay? I always am.”

Paige nods. “I know you will.”

“And that means,” Azzi goes on, “you can’t do this again. You can’t take it out on me. You can’t push me away. Because that makes it really fucking hard for me to help you, and I want to help you.”

Paige nods again, more solemnly this time, moving her hands back to circle her waist. “Yeah, yeah, I know, and I’m so sorry for—“

Azzi holds a hand up to Paige’s lips, effectively shutting her up. “Okay, stop. I accept your apology, I promise. Just, show me you’re sorry and don’t do it again, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Paige says. “‘Course.”

“Good.” Breathing mostly even now, Azzi pulls Paige in for another hug.

With a heavy sigh, Paige hugs her back. “We’re in it together, hm? From now on, together.”

Azzi rests her cheek on Paige’s shoulder, the weight of her arms around her, the feeling of her skin and bones, so familiar. “Yeah. Together.”

Paige pulls back just enough to look at her, and when Azzi reciprocates, she’s uneasy to find that Paige is giving her that same new look. The perplexed, maybe enthralled?, almost worried look that has taken over her face more often than can be explained ever since the first time after their kiss. Azzi really wants to work out what it means.

But, as always, Paige corrects herself and it’s gone as fast as it arrived. “We’re good?”

Azzi nods, smiling softly despite herself. “Yeah, P. We’re good.”

—————————————

Paige has been downstairs with her parents for nearly an hour.

From what Azzi can hear from her spot at the top of the stairs, it doesn’t sound to be going too well. The three of them keep going from yelling to whisper-yelling to yelling again, and Azzi swears Amy has cried like five times at this point.

When Azzi hears Dean say, “We just don’t allow sinners in this house, Paige,” and Paige snap back, “Do not use God against me right now!” Azzi figures it might be time to intervene.

Trying to come up with something quickly, she pulls out her phone and dials Paige’s number. She hears Paige’s phone ring downstairs, and the three of them go quiet before Paige says, “Just—one second,” and then there’s a click on the other line and she’s answering. “Um, hi?”

“Pretend I’m your dad,” Azzi says, hoping she’s not on speaker.

“What?”

“Just pretend I’m your dad, Paige. Seriously.”

“Uh, okay.” The line gets a little muffled and Paige says, “It’s dad.” Azzi can hear both Amy and Dean let out audible groans downstairs.

“Okay, now tell them that I—your dad—am offering to fly you home.”

“I…wha—“ Azzi can tell Paige wants to argue but can’t with her parents right in front of her, so instead she sighs and the line goes muffled again. “He’s, um, he’s offering to fly me home.”

Azzi only has a second to hope and pray that Amy shares Paige’s competitive nature before Amy is saying, “What? You told him about this?”

“No,” Paige answers, “he just knows how you’re like now. And he wants Azzi and I to have a good summer, not a shitty one with shitty people.”

“If you want to go back to your dad’s, go,” Dean says, and Azzi’s heart sinks. Maybe this won’t work.

But then, bless her evil, horrible soul, Amy is stepping in. “No. Absolutely not. I will never hear the end of it if we send you to your father after inviting you over. We just…” Amy sighs, and Azzi thinks she can hear her start crying again. “We want what’s best for you, Paige.”

It’s silent for a moment. And then, “Let me be happy, Mom. Let me see my siblings. Let me and my girlfriend have a good trip with y’all.”

Dean interjects. “We really don’t believe in this kind of stuff.”

“I don’t care,” Paige replies viciously. “I love Azzi. It doesn’t matter that she’s a fuckin’ girl. I…” Paige pauses, quite abruptly, and Azzi wonders if something happened. But then she hears a heavy inhalation and a quiet, “I love her, Mom.”

Azzi knows it’s for the act, but she can’t help the way her stomach somersaults, hearing the words she’s always wished Paige would say.

“And it doesn’t matter what you think of it,” Paige continues. “I’m happy. My faith is strong. And what goes on between me and God isn’t your fucking business.”

“Language,” Amy says immediately. But then it’s silent for another weighted moment and Azzi can imagine Amy and Dean sharing that knowing, judgmental look of theirs. Her heart races while she waits for a consensus, and she’s sure it’s 100 times worse for Paige. But after a few moments, Amy says, “Tell your father that you’re staying here with us. Your siblings will be home tomorrow morning. The four of us adults have a reservation at a restaurant tonight, and we’re all going to go.”

“Mom—“

“We will try,” Amy sighs. “Azzi’s a nice girl. We will—we’ll try.” There’s something tired in her voice when she says, “Right, Dean?”

No answer. But Azzi can imagine him nodding gruffly, and a moment later, with no more words from any of them, Paige appears at the bottom of the stairs. She startles a little when she sees Azzi sitting there at the top.

“Hi,” Azzi says sheepishly, finally disconnecting their call. “I was eavesdropping.”

Paige stares at her, and then starts climbing the stairs, a small smile overtaking their face. “Thanks for saving me.”

“I told you I would,” Azzi replies, waiting for Paige at the top. “So. Dinner with your parents tonight.”

“Yeah. I guess.” Paige gets to the second-top step and stays there, so she’s just a little shorter than Azzi.

“Dinner as a fake lesbian couple with your homophobic parents,” Azzi clarifies, and Paige laughs nervously.

“Uh-huh,” she responds. “I think we needa nap before that.”

“Oh, yeah,” Azzi agrees, pulling Paige up to stand with her. “That is an amazing idea.”

——————————————

Azzi is rudely awoken to none other than an old Tyler, The Creator song blasting through the tinny speakers of Paige’s phone. Azzi groans, and she blindly reaches out for Paige to turn the damn thing off, but her hands only find cold bedsheets. Annoyed, Azzi cracks her eyes open and tries desperately to find Paige’s phone, realizing in the process that Paige’s side of the bed is cold. Strange, considering they still have two hours until dinner.

Finally, after probably thirty seconds of this stupid song playing over and over again, Azzi finds the phone tangled up in the bedsheets and slams the off button. It’s sort of pointless, though, because now she’s very much awake and will not be going back to bed.

She sits up in Paige’s bed, rubbing her eyes and looking around the room. The sun is shining through the curtains, reflecting off the mirror above the vanity and showcasing the off-white walls, the pink door to the adjoining bathroom—which Azzi now realizes is in use, the sound of the shower muffled through the door. She hadn’t noticed before because Paige isn’t awfully singing to some Mariah Carey song. Other than the water, it’s dead quiet in there. She must be nervous.

Fiddling with the pink sheets, Azzi feels nervous, too. Usually, merely being in Paige’s space comforts her, but this room—it doesn’t feel like Paige. It doesn’t smell like her, and it’s too pink. There’s no purple at all, actually. And the vanity—Paige has never known how to do much else other than mascara. In high school, she needed Azzi to tell her what concealer was for, and to teach her how to curl her lashes. She certainly wouldn’t have use for an entire vanity dedicated to makeup. The walls are also decorated with cringy, sort of Bible-thumping quotes and paintings of flowers. There’s not a single basketball poster.

No, this room isn’t Paige at all and Azzi feels an ache in her heart, thinking about how out-of-place she must have felt whenever she came to visit as a kid. How out-of-place she must feel now.

Without Paige to talk to, and without her room to comfort her, Azzi settles for laying on Paige’s side of the bed, burying her face in the blankets, and there she is—vanilla, like her hair products, and lavender, like the lotion she wears and the linen spray she uses, because it calms her down.

Azzi thinks she just might fall back asleep, enveloped in Paige’s scent, but then the door to the bathroom opens and steam billows out just before Paige does, wrapped in a towel, hair wet down her shoulders. Azzi only has a second to ogle the water drops adorning Paige’s collarbones before she’s spotted, and Paige gives her a curious look. “You still sleep? I left my phone here so the alarm would wake you up.”

“Yeah, no, it did,” Azzi says, sitting up quickly, before she looks like a weirdo snuggling up in Paige’s spot. “Just tryin’ to hype myself up for dinner.”

Paige gives her a commiserating look. “Me too. I’m shitting my pants, for real.”

“That why you couldn’t sleep?” Azzi asks, stretching out her back and swinging her legs over the side of the bed.

Paige hums, bending down to rifle around in her suitcase. “I’on even know what to wear. Apparently it’s some fancy restaurant but I’m not wearing a fucking dress.”

Azzi laughs at that, lifting her hands when Paige shoots a glare over her shoulder. “I’m serious, dawg! And it’s not like I brought a suit or nothing.”

“I think you’re overthinking it,” Azzi says, standing up. “Just wear jeans and tuck a t-shirt or something. You’ll look cute no matter what.”

Paige straights up and gives her a cocky grin. “You think all that?”

“Chill, P,” Azzi rolls her eyes, shoving Paige’s shoulder a little.

“What were you doing on my side of the bed, anyway?” Paige asks, and Azzi can’t help the way she freezes. She’d thought Paige hadn’t noticed.

Trying to cover her reaction, she shrugs casually. “I didn’t know you owned the right side of the bed.”

“Nah, we’ve always had our sides,” Paige shakes her head, taking a step closer. “Why was you all cuddled up in mine?”

“Oh, I dunno,” Azzi says, trying for sarcastic but she can’t even really make eye contact, “maybe I rolled over or something.”

“Please. You don’t move in your sleep.”

“Maybe I do. You don’t know.”

“I think I’ve slept with you more often than I’ve slept alone,” Paige scoffs, taking a step even closer so that they’re practically chest-to-chest. “I know damn well.”

“Okay, seriously,” Azzi says, taking a small step back and stumbling when her thighs hit the bed, “go get dressed, you weirdo.”

“Mm,” Paige says, pretending to think about it. But before Azzi can move away, she grabs her waist and they both fall onto the bed while Paige starts to tickle her like crazy.

“Paige!” Azzi screams, laughing so hard she almost can’t breathe. “Get—off, oh my God!”

Paige is laughing right along with her, and it’s a miracle her towel hasn’t dropped yet. “Tell me the truth!”

“What the…” Azzi giggles and squeals when Paige goes for her armpit, “fuck!”

“I won’t stop ‘till you admit it!”

“Okay, fuck, okay!” Azzi pushes Paige off her, and Paige lets up just enough for her to gasp and say, “It smelled like you, okay? The sheets, they…” Paige has stopped completely now, staring at her with a shit-eating grin on her stupid face, “they smell like you.”

“Uh-huh,” Paige replies, “and you missed me so much while I was in the shower that you needed to smell my sheets?” She jabs her one more time in the ribs, making Azzi shriek, before rolling off her. “You lil creep.”

“It wasn’t like that!” Azzi insists, even though that’s exactly what it was like. “Now, seriously, go get dressed. You got me all wet.”

What Azzi means by that, of course, is that Paige’s damp towel and sopping hair had transferred to Azzi’s own clothes and hair. But Paige can’t be normal about anything, so she looks over and grins slyly.

“Don’t,” Azzi sighs.

“Oh, no, it’s okay,” Paige says, sitting up in bed and pulling Azzi up with her. “You don’t gotta be embarrassed. I know I make a lotta girls wet.”

“Stop being weird,” Azzi says, as Paige bends down once again to pull an outfit from her suitcase.

She begins walking back to the bathroom. “I’m not the one who gets turned on by tickling,” Paige calls over her shoulder. Just before she closes the bathroom door behind her, she says, “Don’t worry, we can take care of you after dinner, mama,” and winks at her.

Azzi’s shoe hits the door just as it clicks shut.

—————————————

They drive to the restaurant in silence.

It’s similar to their car ride from the airport, though it is a little less tense than before. Paige isn’t fidgeting too much beside her and her parents aren’t giving each other looks the entire time. That’s gotta be a good sign.

When they arrive at the restaurant, Amy and Dean start chatting idly, Paige and Azzi trailing behind when they walk inside the fancy building and give the hostess their reservation.

It’s only when they’re finally seated that they are addressed.

“So, girls,” Amy says, her voice all forced cheerfulness, “what looks good?”

“I dunno,” Paige mumbles, and Azzi kicks her under the table before saying, “Have you guys ever been here before?”

Amy looks a little startled at Azzi’s voice, but she recovers quickly, looking over at Dean with a forced smile. “Oh, yeah, we come here sometimes.”

Azzi smiles politely. “What do you suggest, then?”

“Um,” Amy says, and then she sort of jerks and Dean winces, and Azzi’s sure Amy has also just kicked him under the table.

Apparently well-trained, he speaks immediately. “We love the spinach ricotta.”

Azzi hums, then nudges Paige. “That sounds good, right?”

“Uh…” Paige looks like she wants to be difficult, but then she sees the warning stare Azzi is giving her and straightens up a little, “yeah, yeah. Sounds good.”

“Wanna share?”

Paige sighs, but luckily it’s barely audible. “Yeah, sure. Let’s share.”

Azzi leaves herself out of the conversation after that, letting Paige answer her parents’ conversation starters. When the waitress comes to take their orders, Paige gets a glass of wine for the both of them. Neither of them really like wine, but it seems classy enough and it might take the edge off just enough that they can actually get through the night unscathed.

It’s not until their dinner arrives that Azzi is addressed again.

“So, Azzi,” Dean says, out of nowhere, “How’s the knee?”

Azzi’s hand goes subconsciously to her surgery scars. “Doing better. PT’s been going good.”

“Good, good.” He leans back in his seat, and Azzi senses trouble. Something about the way Paige protectively rests her arm across the back of Azzi’s seat makes her think she senses it, too.

“You get injured a lot, huh?” He asks.

Azzi sort of hates the way her face gets hot, hoping it doesn’t show up on her brown skin. “I’ve torn my ACL twice, yeah.”

“And your meniscus, right?” he prods.

Without really noticing it, Azzi looks over to Paige, and that’s apparently all Paige needs to jump in. “Hey, let’s not talk about it.”

“Why not?” Dean asks, scoffing. Amy is looking between the three of them nervously. “It’s hard not to talk about. Azzi, you don’t even play basketball at this point.”

“Um,” Azzi replies, her instincts telling her to get hot-headed but with the way Paige is buzzing beside her, she’s gonna need to keep her cool.

“What the hell?” Paige says, her hand going from the chair to Azzi’s shoulder. She looks at Amy. “Mom, you said this wouldn’t happen.”

“Your father is just asking a few questions—“

“He’s not my fucking dad!” Paige exclaims, and Azzi jerks as she’s pulled into Paige’s side. “I already have a dad! He raised me, he loves me, Mom, and he’d never say this shit about Azzi.” Angrily, Paige stands up, tossing a few bills onto the counter and helping Azzi to stand beside her.

“Sweetheart,” Amy says, reaching limply for her daughter while Dean sits beside her looking far too smug. “Paige, where are you going? We’re your ride.”

“We’ll Uber,” Paige responds, wrapping an arm around Azzi’s waist. “I’m not gonna make her sit through your bullshit because you don’t know how to act like a decent fucking human being.”

“He was just asking—,” Any starts, sounding exasperated, but Paige cuts her off.

“You know what he was doing.” She glares at Dean, who shakes his head, smirking. “We’ll go back to the house,” she sneers. “But if this doesn’t change by tomorrow we’re leaving.”

And with that, she takes Azzi hands and leads them both out into the night.

—————————————

Paige keeps it together until they get to the house.

As soon as they’re stepping through the door, she turns away from Azzi and leans down to untie her shoes. Azzi does the same, but she doesn’t miss the sniffling sounds coming from her best friend.

Paige refuses to look at her when they start heading upstairs, and she tries to make a beeline for the bathroom once they close her bedroom door shut behind them. But Azzi stops her, placing a gentle hand on her arm. “P?”

Another sniffle. And then a quick wipe at her face before she’s turning around, trying to look nonchalant but her eyes are red and her lip is trembling. “Yeah?”

“Paige,” Azzi says softly, and Paige crumbles, hands coming up to her face as she starts crying.

Azzi steps forward to hug her, pulling her down to hide in her chest. “I’m sorry, P. I’m so sorry, this—this sucks.”

“I’m sorry,” Paige replies, voice all small and muffled in a way that makes Azzi’s heart hurt. “I thought they were gonna try…I wouldn’t have taken you out with them if I knew…”

“Hey, it’s all good,” Azzi responds, running a hand through Paige’s hair. “I didn’t mind, really. I’ve heard worse.”

This is apparently the wrong thing to say, because Paige just cries harder. “Fuck, Az, you shouldn’t have to do this.” She lifts her head up to look at her, and Azzi absently wipes her face. “This sucks. It’s the first week of summer and I—I was shitty to you and now my parents, and I—“

“Paige,” Azzi says sternly. “I wouldn’t have agreed to this if I couldn’t handle it. I can handle it. It’s you that I’m worried about.”

Paige nods, sniffling again. “You don’t gotta worry. I’m fine.”

“You’re obviously not fine, P,” Azzi says, and Paige winces, wiping her nose with the sleeve of her shirt.

“I’m okay,” Paige insists. “Really. As long as we do this together, I’m okay.”

She straightens up like she’s steeling herself, and Azzi thinks maybe she should do the same.

This is only the first day of their two-week stay.

It’s going to be a long trip.

@azzibuckets @smiths-fan--13 @ch12334 @makethemhoesmad @the-other-half @rosemariiaa

[jenchan-writingmultis]

Twisted Wonderland Boys x Fem Reader in their respective Fairytales (Series)

(Idia's Part)

Previous part (Kalim)

─────❅─────

A/n: Out of every housewarden, I felt like sobbing writing Idia's cause of how fluffy he is, I love him so much. Content Warning: This Fic will be tagged as 16+ since it is a bit suggestive along with mentions of Gorey themes (Azul), it’s very vague. I haven’t finished Book 6 and Book 7 because I’m stuck in Tartarus, but they’re not done here yet. Potential Inaccuracy in Indian Tradition, Indian and Greek clothing, if ever you see inaccuracy about it, please let me know, I only did a bit of research about it. The reason for potential OOC was cause I mixed both the classic Villains with the personalities of our beloved boys. You have a child with Kalim here!

─────❅─────

First Batch would be: Riddle, Leona, Azul

Second Batch would be: Kalim, Idia, Malleus

List of Villains interconnecting with each character:

Kalim = The sultan Idia = Hades ─────❅───── Idia: The underworld has always been Idia’s little comfort zone, although at first, he didn’t want to rule it, due to how depressing it gets sometimes, but along with his brother Ortho who takes care of “outside” activities, aka meetings with those overbearing gods and goddesses who think they’re better than anyone, he didn’t mind the work as long as it’s with him. So far, his duties were all just about guiding souls into whatever the fuck they want or are allowed to go, honestly if they all became lost souls, he wouldn’t give a flying damn.

One day, however, an odd discrepancy appeared in the calculations of souls being accepted—an unregistered soul had entered the narrative. Concerned, he strolled toward the portal of Tartarus to investigate. When he peered inside, a sudden flash of blinding light erupted, disorienting him. Before he could react, a heavy force slammed into his body, causing him to stumble.

“What the!” he grunted, feeling a heavy body on top of him, he rubbed his head, opening his eyes, adjusting to the sudden light-to-darkness transition.

You stirred, finding your hands pinning him down. His eyes widened in shock as he pushed you off, scrambling backward so quickly that he hit his back on the wall with a loud slam.

“What In the world?!” he screeched, his hair glowing brightly meaning he was incredibly nervous, while you seemed to be lost, standing up, you pat away the dust off your outfit, taking notice of Idia who still was pressed on the wall.

“Idia?” you went closer to him, he looked like an angry kitten, glaring at you at first but the moment you got closer he stiffens up, pushing his hands to protect himself from you.

“Stay back! You anomaly!” he shouted that it echoed around the empty room, you were taken aback, “Idia, it’s me.” you said, eyebrows knitting in frustration.

“H-how do you know my name?” he asked, looking at you confusedly, were you sent by his other brother who he doesn’t even think of one, Zeus? You look kind of angelic so there’s a suspicion.

“Idia, you’re my boyfriend” Wow point blank you decided to kill him with those words, boyfriend his ass, what boyfriend, all he knows is that he prefers to be single than have a lover, also he wants to add that you are way out of his league, there’s no way you like him that way, and this is the first time you met him, was there a camera around here? The edited laughter? Where is it? He’s waiting for that to come.

Realizing that he was overthinking again, you snapped your fingers catching his attention; stating your name you tried to see if you got any reaction, but nothing. He really didn’t remember you.

You were going to be saddened by this, if it weren’t for the fact that the tips of his hairs had a slight pink on it meaning was still a chance for you to get your boyfriend back.

Okay, you two might be misunderstanding things, while Idia was observant, he can’t think straight when he’s in front of someone, his black and blue robe being a perfect cover for himself, he even had a hoodie knitted for him to cover his hair with.

You noticed that he was taller than before, raising your eyebrow, you grabbed his arm, which made him freeze up, looking at you like you just harassed him, his sweat drops. “What?”

“Since when did you get taller?” you asked, he slides your hand off of his arm, rubbing it a bit, “I don’t know?” he answered confusedly, before waving his hand dismissively, “No more questions, I’m bringing you back to Zeus” he grumbled, his stupid brother playing pranks on him again.

“What? Zeus?” you walked faster to catch up on him when he started speedwalking away, “Y’know, God of Olympus?” he said, weirded out why you didn’t know Zeus, everyone knows him.

“Wait, Zeus as in the God from long ago?” you asked further, which made Idia stop his tracks, turning to look at you, his figure looming, he looked like a grim reaper when he stands with you before, but now it’s more evident.

“What do you mean long ago?” he asked as bewildered as you are, why are you acting this way anyways? Anomaly that popped out of nowhere and almost giving him a concussion and right now you’re giving him a migraine, what’s next huh? brain aneurysm?   

“Are you not my Idia?” you frowned, looking at him closer, he exhibited a different style, he was taller, slightly shorter hair, bluish skin instead of pale.

“Your” Idia? What does that mean?

The more you open your mouth the more questions pop out, sighing he decided to cover your mouth with his hand. “Please… just shut up for a minute”

Okay, first theory! You’re not from around here, I mean you just got spat out like trash by the Tartarus and suddenly proclaiming that he’s your boyfriend, he feels bad for you, your standard is in hell if you’re dating him, you’re pretty too, a disrespect to your face really.

Second theory, which he’s leaning on more, you’re a spy sent by his brother Zeus; to make him fall for you and you break his heart and upload it to magicam or something.

If you think he’s self-deprecating too much, please, he’s just being realistic with the situation.

“First off, I am not yours” he clarified, lifting his hands as if he’s surrendering to you. “I never met you in my whole life, you’re cute but no”

Rejected by your own boyfriend, you wanted to pinch his cheeks for it, you were going to be hurt by this, but the thing is, the way he acts reminded you of the first stages of your relationship with him, he wasn’t the best with it.

“Okay,” you said, being short with him, for some reason that made him feel bad, scratching the back of his neck, he wanted to hold your cheek or hand to comfort you, an odd feeling.

“Sorry- I mean if you want to, I can act like your boyfriend or something” he murmured, his voice gradually decreasing to the point you barely heard the last words.

“It’s fine Idia, no need” not wanting to force him into that kind of thing, however, you noticed that his little fire hair started to fizzle out, panicking a bit you touched his hand, holding it, “wait I mean, okay, sure we can act”

Phew, that got his fire back up, lucky you. “Okay…” he said awkwardly coughing as he uses his tech to call for Ortho. “Ortho, can you come here?”

Ortho was impressively fast with going back to the underworld, looking the same except his clothes or rather his cyborg parts looked Greek like, it explains why you were wearing a tunic.

“Scan her” Idia said, using his eyes to signal ortho who to scan, in which Ortho grins brightly. “Okay!”

You stayed still as Ortho used his eyes to scan you, it was something that came natural for you, especially since your Ortho does that often.

“So?” Idia asked, leaning on the wall, Ortho shook his head, looking conflicted. “Nope, she doesn’t have any data around Ancient Greece, or anywhere”

“Huh” he didn’t seem surprised. “Are you sure about this?” he asked, patting Ortho’s head. “Yeah! I did another scan but there’s no indication of her presence anywhere.

So, you really were just transported by Tartarus to Ancient Greece, connecting the dots, that means Idia here is…

Noticing you staring at him in deep thought He smiles a bit, you looked funny thinking like that, pouty and all. “Since you’re really not from here, my name is Idia, God of the Underworld, and this is Ortho, my brother.” Ortho waves at you enthusiastically and he was genuinely surprised that his brother introduced him instead of himself.

“I know” you hummed, crossing your arms. “I told you already, we’re dating- “

Idia tried to cover your mouth before you spout that out but failed as Ortho’s eyes widens. “You’re dating my brother in the other world?! You mean there’s another version of us in your world?”

Oh dear, you’re in it now.

Ortho basically asked you plenty of questions, already happy that his brother pulled someone like you, you were gorgeous!

Idia was a bit happy you got along with his brother, he sometimes feels bad that he keeps Ortho in such a depressing place instead of being a normal kid outside and playing.

Also he can’t help but get flustered whenever you randomly get physically affectionate with him, he’s been trying to find a way to get you back in your world, but it’s proving to be difficult since Tartarus maybe his domain, but it’s a system that’s entirely independent from him, think of it as the pity system in his gacha games, even if you hit enough 80 pulls, it doesn’t guarantee the limited character you want.

But, as long as he can, Idia tries to make sure every time he hangs out with you is worthwhile, it’s the first time he made effort to spend time with someone, when he’s off work, he finds himself going to the guest room, asking if you wanted to come eat with him and Ortho, or sometimes, you end up in his room, playing a two-player game with him.

Ever since you came into his life, he started going out of his room more, back then he usually just… does his work and go to his room. That’s all Now he’s trying to go outside more, especially when Ortho told him that to get you back faster was by “thinking outside the box” which just meant that he should go touch some grass and let the gears in his brain think of a solution.

He didn’t really know when he fell for you, but he noticed it when you were outside with him, in the largest field that had nothing but nature around. The outfit that Ortho lend you fits your palette so perfectly, it almost made him want to take a picture.

You were admiring the view while glancing around, picking up flowers.

Confused with what you were doing he walked to you. “Hey what-“ getting cut off as you shove a bouquet of flowers on his chest, a ribbon clumsily wrapped around the stems of the flowers.

“For you” you said, smiling, making his heart skip a bit, he accepted the gift as Ortho called out for you, giving him a glance before you grab his collar, pulling him down to kiss his cheek before walking away.

That got his hair to burn bright pink, shaking from the adrenaline, he coughed awkwardly, hopefully, Ortho didn’t see what you did.

Well, he’s having a hard time finding a way to send you back home, so… it might take a while.

─────❅───── A/n: ACCCCCCK IDIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA ILYSM ༼;´༎ຶ ۝ ༎ຶ༽ Malleus' Part

[yourcutelittlegayfriend]

No More Chances:

Fate's Prologue Assessment

CUT!

Let's review your scrip again, yes?

• Regression is the act of going back or a return to a past.

• You can guess what types of manwha I've reading.

• That's the AU for this fic that I intended for Y/N to have.

• Regarding about their past, I have mentioned that they have been regressing far too many times, reliving a new and yet still old life.

• Answer to why so many resets is possibly because of the 'butterfly effect' or something where even repeating resets can achange the outcomes because of the new actions you perform.

• Y/N might have done something that was different from 'the script' that led to a bad outcome resulting to another reset.

• The past or Y/N's original life is permanent and can never be change.

• Y/N will always come back as the young abandoned orphan of Bruce Wayne, who was neglected and forgotten in favor of his other children.

• Resets can only happen when Y/N is literally killed, Y/N does not have the power to control it, if Y/N want to reset, you know what you have to do, that's the price you must pay.

• Life is precious and if you want to play with it, it'll cost you your own life and sanity.

• I headcannon that death already know about this but decided not to interfer, it's not like you're an actual immortal or anything, I guess you can say you're already punishing yourself by caging your fate in a loop hole.

• Going back to the backstories, everything is a bit blurry but will be revealed by flashbacks (That's what happens when you keep **** yourself).

• Y/N remembers their mother but not her face or voice, they remember moments with them but only the fleeting ones, their touch, the warm kiss on your forehead and the cold hands that touched your bloodied cheek before it drop to the ground.

• Y/N is born and raise as a Gothamite more so on the poorer parts of Gotham.

• It's a bit ironic that Y/N's backstory is almost the same as Bruce if not for a little difference in narrative, A young mother finally earnings extra money from work and took her kid out for some mother and child bonding as a request for their birthday but the night ended with a robber being a little trigger happy and shot the mother in an alleyway grabbing all her money and possesions while leaving the traumatized child to watch their mother's life leave her body.

• Commissioner Gordon arrived at the scene and couldn't help but reminiscent a little wayne boy also sitting on the cold concrete floor of crime alley crying for his parents death years ago.

• Implied that in the next parts that Y/N will become mature and more far off than the other version of her.

• Y/N might be a kid again but they remembered some of their supposed 'ending' and in return gain more than enough trauma.

• It might be a little bit corny or too much but I want Y/N to be a little petty or hateful to the rest of the family in the upcoming interactions.

• Only acting nice and patient around the rest when you face them, they're detectives I know but how are they gonna find out when your fake acting doesn't really matter from the rest of their problems am I right?.

Lil tiny note : I want this fic have a lil angsty with some comedic stuff would that be alright?

That's all I got for now but if any of you guys want to add more traits for your own Y/N you guys can add it down.

Let's take 5!

I'll prepare for your next lines, ok?

〖 = ✧ = 〗

Do you guys want me to tag you on this stuff as well or just on the main story?

[starsinthesky5]

you belong with me IV part 2 || joe burrow x reader

description: being each other's everything is all you two have ever wanted, and now you finally are in every way possible.

a/n: first and foremost THANK YOU to all my anons and everyone who sent in requests and ideas! i appreciate you all so much and hopefully this lived up to all your expectations! i got sooo many requests and ideas for this particular fic and had so much fun working on it!! love you all!!!

second of all, thank you for patiently waiting! sorry it took me this long LMAO

edit: oh and forgot to add, there’s a good few references to superstar by taylor swift towards the end! wouldn’t be YBWM without fearless references!

warnings: language, SMUT. (there’s a lot.)

word count: 19 k

you belong with me master list (previous parts can be found here)

----------------------------------------------------------

(Direct continuation of part 1)

After looking at the photo strips for a few more moments, you walked back out of the closet and sat down on his bed, your eyes looking around his room as you tried to think of what you could do now. 

While sitting there you noticed some things about his room that you hadn’t before, like how he hung up the star map you got him for his birthday up next to the picture of the two of you and his parents after the national championship game. You stared at the photo a little more carefully, realizing how you all looked so much like a family even back then and how much you and Joe looked like a couple in the photo even though you weren't.

“Missed all the signs,” you giggled to yourself as you then looked over at his TV table. Various small LEGO structures, a few books about space and physics, and some more photos were placed on the table. There were photos of him and his friends, some pictures from when he was a kid, and a few photos from the past few years which included you. His room perfectly represented who he was inside as it was filled with meaningful pictures, nerdy little knick-knacks, and everything close to his heart. 

On the outside, Joe appeared stoic, hard-headed, and confident. On the inside, he was a full softie and the most adorable person on the planet and you were lucky enough to get to see this side of him which not many people did since he kept that part away from the world. You also got to see a side of him that was specifically reserved for you. The intimate side of him; his lover-boy personality, his unparalleled sexiness, and the part of him that made you weak in the knees.

“His duality is insane,” you whispered to yourself as you got up from the bed and walked out of his room. You made your way down the hall towards the stairs before backtracking when you passed his office.

You walked inside, giggling as you were met with a shelf filled with more LEGO structures including the one you got him for his birthday. “Such a softie,” you smiled to yourself as you walked behind his desk chair, taking in everything in the room. You never really came into his office so this was engaging for you. You never really explored his house now that you thought about it. You usually just stayed wherever he was since the majority of the time you were here in the past was when you were just friends and had no reason to venture around the house. 

You looked down at the desk and saw his computer, his calendar, a silly doodle bob pen holder, a Bengals-themed Newton’s cradle, and then a framed recent photo of the two of you.

You tilted your head as you picked up the frame, examining the photo that you remembered him taking just a few weeks ago. 

Flashback to New Year’s Eve 

You were sitting on the couch in Joe’s backyard, the warmth of the fire pit in front of you heating you up as you sat cross-legged in your champagne-colored strapless skin-tight dress, waiting for Joe to come back with your drinks. You glanced up at the TV that was mounted above the Patio Bar where Joe was pouring you both a glass of Blanc de Blancs, watching the live view from Times Square as the ball drop was commencing momentarily. Your eyes then dropped down to Joe, who looked incredibly gorgeous wearing a cream long-sleeved knit polo sweater while topping off your drinks. He placed the bottle down and looked up, his eyes meeting yours which sent chills down your body. 

He grabbed both the flutes and walked over to you, ���You’re staring,” he said with a cocky smile as he placed them down on the side table and sat down next to you.

“It’s for a good reason,” you bit your lip as you gave him a slow once over. “You look amazing,”. 

“I know a girl with good taste,” he shrugged as he stretched out his arm behind you and brought you in closer. 

“You sure do,” you smiled as you laid your head against his shoulder after kissing his cheek.

“How much time do we have before the ball drop?” he asked as he gently ran his thumb across your shoulder.

“Hmm, about 15 minutes,” you said after you looked back at the TV. “I still can’t believe you didn’t invite anyone else over to watch,” you giggled. 

“Why invite more people over when just you is enough?” he asked, a blush creeping up on your face as a result of his words. 

“I appreciate the lovey-doveyness from you but I’m sure your parents and family members are pretty confused as to why you bailed from the family party and didn’t initially offer to have them over at your place like you usually do. They probably think you’re spending New Year alone since they don’t know about us yet,” you said as you looked up at the starry night sky. 

“I wanted it to be just us tonight,” he said as he joined you by also looking up at the sky. 

“Any reason in particular?” you say, turning your head to look at him. “You know I love your family and wouldn’t mind celebrating with them, even if it meant having to sneak away for our New Year’s kiss,”. 

“It’s our first New Year together as a couple so I wanted it to be special and with 0 distractions. I want to start off the year with the one that means the most to me,” he said, turning his head to face you after he finished talking. 

“Awww, Joe,” you cooed, giving him a quick peck before tucking your head into his neck. 

He definitely had made the night pretty special. First, it was treating you to a delicious and impressive dinner he prepared all on his own (with some tips from his chef), then you both decided to make cupcakes together (with a side of karaoke) since you had quite a bit of time before midnight, then it was making a bucket list for the year filled with things you wanted to do together while the cupcakes were in the oven, and after that it was you two sitting on the floor for about an hour building the LEGO rose bouquet set he got you for Christmas (you both really loved your LEGO’s). At about 11:00 you both went out to the backyard and got situated by the fire while watching the New Year’s special on TV. 

“We’ve had a pretty wild year haven’t we?” he said while letting out a content sigh. 

“Very wild,” you nodded. “Specifically the final stretch,” you added, referring to the past month with Joe. “But it’s been the best year of my life and the next one will be even better…because of you,”.

Joe swore his heart exploded for maybe the 100th time when you said that. The fact that he made you feel like this was the greatest feeling in the world. “I love you,” he said before capturing your lips in a sweet kiss. “So much that it’s not even funny,” he said in between kisses. 

“The feeling is mutual,” you smiled against him. 

“This year’s going to be so much fun. I can’t wait to do everything on our bucket list,” he softly laughed. 

“Me too. I think I’m looking most excited to go camping and road-tripping to California,”. 

“I still can’t believe you’ve never been camping,” Joe widened his eyes and laughed. 

“Listen, I don’t want to get eaten by a bear or kidnapped by some random man in the woods,” you blinked.

“What if that happens to us? I don’t think me being with you makes a difference,”.

“Yes, it does. The bear will be too blinded by your hotness to eat us and you’ll scare the random man away with your big muscles,” you teased while gripping his bicep. 

“I’ll probably book us a cabin,” he nodded after hearing your plan of action if you came across something like that. 

“Nooo,” you groaned like a little child. “I want the traditional camping experience. Tent and everything,”.

“We can still bring a tent and do that for a night but I think you’d feel more comfortable in a cabin,” he said while moving your hair out of your face. “Sleeping in a sleeping bag gets exhausting after the first night anyway. And there’s more privacy in a cabin so we won’t be at risk of being seen doing certain things,” he whispered in your ear. 

“Can’t stay away, can you?” you giggled at his insatiableness.

“Mm, Mm,” he shook his head. “It’s like a drug,” he said as he kissed your cheek, referring to the intimate time between you two. “Can’t quit and won’t quit,” 

“Good to know. I should probably change up my birth control then since we refuse to do it the way it was taught in high school health class,” you laughed as you looked back at the TV again, feeling Joe laugh beside you as you saw that the time was now 11:53. 

“Oops. 7 minutes to go,” you said as you sat back up and handed Joe his champagne glass while grabbing yours. 

“Time to make a toast,” he said as he lifted his glass in the air. 

“Okay,” you giggled as you lifted your glass in the air. “But what are we toasting to?”.

“To us,” he smiled. “A toast to us and a new year filled with good vibes, lots of love, countless laughs, and even more moments where I fall even more in love with you than I already am,”. 

You felt your heart swell while your eyes pooled with tears, none falling through as you blinked them away and spoke up. “And I want to toast to the same thing, but also to you,”.

“To me?” Joe asked, slightly confused. 

“Mhm. To the person who literally turned my world upside down 9 years ago. The person that I’m lucky enough to call my best friend and my boyfriend. The person that makes me the happiest woman alive and the person that I can’t wait to spend every single New Years with from now on. The person that makes my heart smile and sets my soul on fire. The person that is my absolute everything,” you grinned. 

Joe stayed silent for a few moments as he took in the beautiful words you were saying to him before giving you a small nod and a fervent smile, “I’ll toast to that,”. You both moved your flutes closer together, a small clinking noise coming once you finished the toast before downing your champagne in one big gulp. 

You watched as a drop of champagne slid down Joe’s lip and slowly down to his chin, you quickly leaned over and slid your tongue along his chin to catch the drop, then pressed a kiss to the area after you were done.

“Ohhh, so we’re already getting to it?” Joe wiggled his eyebrows.

“Nope,” you giggled. “Not yet. Just making sure you didn’t get champagne on your clothes,” you said as you looked back at the time and saw that you had 3 minutes left.

Joe looked back as well and then stood up from his seat, extending his hand out to help you up before leading you to the open floor area. “It’s almost time,” he grinned.

“Yes, it is,” you laughed as you moved your hair back. “Our first ever New Year's kiss. One for the history books,”. 

“Damn straight,” Joe said as he abruptly pulled you closer to him by your waist, the sudden movement catching you off guard. 

“Someone’s eager,” you smiled.

“Oh, it’s definitely not like I haven’t been wishing for this moment every December 31st for the past 9 years,” he rolled his eyes.

“Well, you’re about to have your wish come true in about 60 seconds,” you winked. 

Joe smiled at you before turning around to see the TV, the camera panning over Times Square and zooming in on all the couples getting ready for their kisses. Then he turned back over to you and saw the pure happiness on your face and the little twinkle in your eye that was even more precious in the lighting of his backyard. He still couldn’t quite believe this was real life. He doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to believe that this is real life as this all felt like a dream that he didn’t want to wake up from. 

Joe took a deep breath before turning a bit more serious, “I love you. And I know I say it to you so often that it may lose its meaning but I really really love you more than anything else in this world and I’m so lucky and glad that I can do this with you. You make my world complete, you’re the most extraordinary person I’ve ever met, and you’ve changed my life for the better,” he quickly said as he gazed into your beautiful eyes. 

“Joe…I-”.

“10!” the countdown on the TV said. 

You looked into his eyes and felt all of the thoughts in your head disappear. The only thing you could think about was how much you loved him, which was more than enough to fill your empty head. 

“9!” you heard as you felt his grip on your waist tighten.  

“8!” you heard as you felt his hot breath against your skin, your arms looping around his neck as you both smiled at each other like two love-struck fools. 

“7!” you heard as you felt Joe sway you back and forth, a soft laugh coming from your mouth.

“6!” you heard as you moved your hands into his soft hair, twirling the strands around your fingers as you continued to get lost in his eyes.

“5!” you heard as you heard Joe speak up again. 

“You are the best thing that’s ever been mine,” he said. 

“4!” you heard before you spoke up. 

“I'm completely, utterly, and madly in love with you,” you whispered. 

“3!” you heard as you both slowly ghosted your lips over each other, your cold noses nuzzling against each other as you looked down at his pink lips.

“2!” you heard as your breathing picked up while your eyes moved back up to his heated gaze. “You’re everything,” he said, just loud enough for you to hear. 

“1!” you heard before you crashed your lips against each other. 

“Happy New Year!” the TV said, sounds of celebrations echoing through the backyard as fireworks started going off above you. 

You cupped Joe’s face and pulled him closer as he held you tighter, your lips saying so much to each other just like how your hearts were as they were so incredibly close given you close your chest was to his. Fireworks were going off inside of them, just like the ones that were going off in the sky above you. 

Your tongues tangled in each other's mouths, the taste of champagne lingering which made the kiss even more intoxicating than it already was. He was kissing you as if he had never kissed you before; the way his big hand gripped your waist and slid down your back was sending heat throughout your cold body, the way his lips molded against yours was almost like they were specifically made for you, and the warm and comfortable feeling you got from him was an irreplaceable feeling you couldn’t replicate any way else. 

After a few more moments of being attached to each other’s lips, you pulled away—both of you a little breathless—and rested your foreheads against each other, the biggest grins on both your faces. 

“Happy New Year, Baby,” Joe whispered.

“Happy New Year, Joey,” you blushed. 

End of flashback 

The photo was a picture of the two of you post-kiss, the fireworks visible in the background as you leaned your head against his cheek and rested your hand on his chest (the hand with the ring) and both of you had the most raw and beautiful smiles on your faces. 

You put the frame back down before pulling out your phone, clicking on Joe’s contact, and typing up a message. 

You: saw the photo on your desk.. you move fast ;)

Joe: good photos and even better memories deserve to be shared asap 🤷‍ i also like having a constant reminder of you when i'm in there 

You: have I told you how much I love you lately? because i realllyyyy do

Joe: maybe a few times but I don’t mind hearing it again.. but anyway, how are you doing? even though it’s only been a little over an hour ish since I’ve been gone 

You: great! took a nice long shower in your bathroom which by the way, water pressure is to die for. you’ll need to get used to me taking hour showers because wow..

Joe: noted lol. what’re you doing now? 

You: was about to head downstairs to make something for dinner but your office caught my eye first 

Joe: you aren’t naked are you…

You: i was kidding when i said that, well kind of..but im clothed don’t worry

Joe: good to hear ;)  and also don’t bother making anything for dinner. i ordered you some food and it should be at the house in a little bit 

You let out a soft laugh as you shook your head, Joe was always two steps ahead of you and always made sure you had everything you needed even if he wasn’t physically there with you.

Joe: there’s also a bunch of wine in the wine cellar so pick out your favorite and have at it. just don’t get too drunk without me 

You: no promisessss. but thanks for dinner 🥰

Joe: of course. im gonna go get dinner from the dining room with the guys so I’ll text you later?

You: okay, i love you <3

Joe: i love you x2

You let out a relaxed breath before slipping your phone back into your pocket, taking one more look around his office before walking out and making your way downstairs again. 

You find yourself in the wine cellar a few minutes later, your eyes glancing around the room as you are a bit overwhelmed with the amount of wine he has. “For a man who doesn’t drink very often, he sure has a great variety of wine,” you giggled as you looked around for your favorite. 

You smiled once you found a bottle of Malbec Rosé, sliding it out from the hold and exiting the cellar. Once you’re back in the kitchen, you pour yourself a hearty glass of the drink and sit back down on the barstool, sliding around as you think about what you could do now. 

“Hm, I guess I could just walk around more?” you whispered to yourself as you took a sip before sliding off the stool and getting up, the speaker on the counter by the sink catching your eye.

“Oo, music would be nice,” you thought while pulling out your phone and connecting your music to the speaker. Once you get that situated, you turn up the volume and start your walk around his house. 

“I'm no one special, just another wide-eyed girl, Who's desperately in love with you…” you mumble, singing along to the song as you walk past the patio door. You stop and look out from the door, thinking about how this patio would become your patio in a few short weeks. You’d get to have friends and family over here with Joe. You’d get to swim out in the pool with him and you’d get to sit by the fire every night in his arms while talking and watching the stars together. You'd get to watch the seasons pass by with him out there, seeing the leaves turn from green to orange and then covered with snow. 

You smiled while taking another sip of your wine before you continued walking, this time along the couch where you both spent a lot of time together watching various shows and movies and sometimes just talking for hours. You looked at the 2 built-in wall shelves on each side of the mounted TV, both decorated with fake plants, some more photos, and some unique decor pieces that you remember helping him pick out. He always had an interesting taste when it came to art and decorations and the house definitely showed that.

“Can’t wait to add my own flair to these things,” you softly chuckled. 

You continued walking around the house, this time walking past his special display shelf that had a few of his accolades on it. Your eyes went straight to the National Championship trophy, then to his Heisman, then to the few NFL honors awards, and then his AFC championship trophy. There was a large space next to it that was specifically kept empty because he wanted to put his first Lombardi and his Super Bowl ring there. Your eyes slowly welled with tears as you looked at all of his accomplishments, seeing how far he had come since you first met him all those years ago and how you’d been with him through every single one of these things. Your heart swelled once you realized you’d also get to be with him whenever this empty space would be filled with the greatest accomplishment of all. 

You took another sip of your wine and continued walking around the house, taking note of some empty spaces where you could add something of your own. A few minutes later, you heard the doorbell ring so you checked the camera and saw that it was the delivery person with your dinner. 

You placed the glass down and got the bags from the door before you walked back into the kitchen and laid everything out on the counter, the first bag was from Chipotle.

“He knows me too well,” you shook your head as you looked at the bowl which had everything you wanted on it. “How did he even memorize my order?”.

The second bag was from a local bakery you loved. “Hm?” you questioned why there was something from the bakery as you opened up the bag, pulling out a square-shaped box. You flipped the lid open and inside sat a beautiful heart-shaped cake with a white frosting base, tiny red hearts scattered across the surface, and a cursive ‘i love you’ in the middle all in red frosting. 

“Joe…,” you giggled as you stuffed your face in your hands and then moved them into your hair. His thoughtfulness knew no bounds and he had a constant need to keep you smiling, and whatever he did always worked. 

You pulled out your phone again and pulled up his contact, typing up another message to send him.

You: okay im this close to breaking all the rules and sneaking into the hotel and into your room 

Joe: i assume this is about the cake? either that or you’re just horny as hell

You: its most definitely about the cake (maybe a bit of the second thing too). how hard do you think it is to break into the facility and steal the mascot’s costume and then show up to the hotel and get up to your floor without being caught? my idea from a few weeks ago still sounds foolproof 🤷‍♀️

Joe: i’d say you probably wouldn’t make it past the front desk before getting the cops called on you 

You: yeah you’re probably right because they most definitely will think im your stalker or something 💀. 

i just wish i could kiss you right now. you’re the sweetest for this. thank you 💞

Joe: you can make it up to me tomorrow morning :)

You: oh i definitely will 

You wished you could’ve thanked him in person but there was nothing you could do at the moment to do so. After a few more minutes of texting about tomorrow, you grabbed your dinner, got comfy on the couch, and turned on an episode of The Office. It didn’t hit the same without Joe next to you, but it made you feel close to him since you were starting to miss him. 

“Separation anxiety is brutal,” you joked, only partly though. Normally you wouldn’t be missing him like this but being in the house without him was making it worse than usual. 

An hour later 

After wrapping up your dinner and eating a slice of the cake, you cleaned everything up downstairs before heading up to the bedroom for the night. Right now you were in his closet as you were trying to find something to spice up your game day look for tomorrow and his jewelry collection was the perfect place to go. 

Your eyes scanned his impressive jewelry collection, the sparkly diamonds and jewels were as dazzling as a million tiny stars embedded in the night sky. He had quite a few iced-out chains, some big statement pieces, and some simple more tamer pieces. 

Your eyes stopped once you saw his large ‘9’ iced out chain, a smile creeping up on your face because you remember when he wore it for his Bose photo shoot last year and how sexy he looked with it on, his longer headband hair made him even more desirable. You obviously couldn’t say anything then because you were just friends and he had a girlfriend at the time, but now you could say and do whatever you wanted. 

You picked up the chain from the velvet pad it was resting on, the necklace a little heavier than you expected. “How the hell does this not break his neck,” you whispered to yourself as you held it up in front of your face. You obviously weren’t going to wear this one tomorrow, but lucky for you he had a smaller version of the necklace right next to it. 

“Now that’s my kind of thing,” you giggled as you started to place the necklace back down but stopped once you saw one of his hats sitting on the shelf across the closet. A sultry idea popped into your head, one that you’d never thought of for anyone before let alone Joe. 

“I may not be able to physically thank him for being such a great boyfriend, but I can send him a little something to show my appreciation and give him a treat of his own,” you smirked as you took the necklace over to where the hat was. You put the necklace down and slip your clothes off, then put the hat on your head but backwards just like Joe did, and then put the iced-out ‘9’ chain around your neck. You were standing just in your lacy light orange bra and pantie set, the cold diamond ‘9’ resting right above your cleavage. You slipped off one of the straps of your bra so that more of your breast was visible, grabbed your phone, and walked over to the floor-length mirror. You got down on your knees and sat back, spreading open your legs a little bit to get a good position. You opened up the camera and snapped a few pics of yourself like this, then switched up the poses a little bit to tease him. 

“He’s gonna love this,” you giggled to yourself. 

For the last picture, you took the chain of the necklace and held it between your teeth, the ‘9’ now dangling as you slid the strap of your bra down a little lower, the top of your nipple now in the frame. You snapped a final photo and let go of the necklace which was now starting to hurt your neck. You had never done this for any other guy before so this was new for you, but you were comfortable with it since you knew it was only going to be seen by a guy that absolutely loved you to pieces. 

If you told yourself 9 years ago that you’d be sitting inside Joe’s closet taking these kinds of photos to send him, you’d slap yourself in the face and call bullshit. But you shouldn’t be surprised you were doing this considering how ravenous you two had been around each other since the first time you two had sex about a month ago. It was like another part of you was unlocked by him, a part no other guy could crack open. You two just couldn’t stay away from each other. 

Flashback to the morning after your first time 

Your eyes slowly fluttered open as you felt a pair of warm lips pressing feather-light kisses to your lips. You fully opened your eyes and saw Joe cutely smiling down at you as he was admiring your beautiful face and tucking your hair behind your ear. “Morning beautiful,” he said with a kiss to your forehead, his voice more raspy than usual due to last night’s activities. 

“Good morning,” you rasped, your voice also incredibly scratchy given how much you were screaming last night.

“We sound soooo…,” he began to say.

“Fucked out?” you giggled.

“Yeah,” he nodded, his cheeks turning a little red. “It was worth it though. A solid 2 rounds before we crashed,”.

“Did you have fun?” you smiled up at him, internally praying that he enjoyed this as much as you did.

“Fun is an understatement. That was the best sex I’ve ever had in my entire life,” he mumbled as he leaned in to kiss you again. You smiled and grabbed his cheek with your hand, moving closer to his head as the kiss slowly became more heated. His hands went under the covers and settled on the bare skin of your lower back, his soft and familiar touch making you want more as he pulled you closer to him. You shrugged the covers off your nude body and slowly hooked your legs around his waist, your lips still attached as you got on top of him. 

His hands settled on your hips as you continued to share a feverish kiss for a few more moments. Both of your tongues tangled in each other's mouths; your hands were massaging the soft skin of his neck while he was tracing and lightly scratching your back.

“Hey, what was that for?” Joe pouted after you abruptly pulled away.

“Want to make it a solid 3 rounds?” you winked, your body still very sore but sizzling with anticipation because of the man underneath you.

Joe looked at you for a few moments, thinking about how lucky he was to be sitting here with you right now, especially like this. You two were sharing such intimate moments with each other and he had never thought that this would’ve ever happened, but this was reality. “I thought you’d never ask. I cannot get enough of you,” he grinned as he started to scooch up to flip you both over.  

You placed your hands on both of his shoulders and pushed him back down, “Mm, Mm. You did all the work last night. It’s my turn,” you shook your head, the thing that you were implying making Joe’s heart skip a beat. Since last night was the first time you did this, you’d never been on top of him before and the thought of that happening was making him lose all coolness.

“Just take it easy. I don’t want you to hurt yourself and if it's too much we can always stop,”  he softly said as he stroked your thigh, just body humming with anticipation just like yours. 

“I love you,” you said as you leaned down to peck his lips before moving back up. 

“I love you too,” he smiled as he put his arms behind his head and laid back, his bulging biceps even more prominent this way. He looked so good right now with his messy bedhead, swollen lips, that little purple love bite you left on his neck last night, and his sweet bedroom eyes. It was all making you even more needy for him than you’d ever felt before. 

You grabbed his growing erection and guided the tip between your drenched folds before slipping it inside, a loud moan leaving your lips at the sudden fullness you were feeling. “Oh, fuck,” you whined as you threw your head back, still not fully used to his size. 

Joe looked up at you and watched as you slid down his length and got comfortably seated. He was trying not to lose his cool but he really really wanted to flip you over and fuck you senseless because of how sexy you looked above him right now, but he knew you wanted to do this so he was letting you do your thing. You rested your palms on his chest as you slowly started to slide up and down his length, each movement sending electric jolts throughout your body as you could feel every single inch of him right now. “Joe,” you moaned as you picked up the pace, your manicured nails digging into his chest. 

You leaned down and gently bit his thick bicep, a throaty moan leaving his lips after you pressed a kiss to the little bite mark you left. “Y/N,” he panted. 

Joe felt himself getting lost in your touch, his brain getting all foggy as sounds of pleasure started leaving his lips. “Fuck, Y/N,” he moaned as he moved his arms from under his head and gripped your waist. Sounds of skin slapping against skin filled the room as you quickened your pace, Joe’s eyes stuck on your perfect breasts that were bouncing in front of him with movement. You felt and looked heavenly on top of him, a feeling he’d never felt before with anyone else filling his mind and body. 

“Baby, please you feel so good,” Joe whimpered as he dug his head further back into the pillow. “You’re doing so fucking good,”. Joe was having the absolute time of his life watching you bounce on his cock as sounds of pleasure were leaving your lips like a prayer. The thought of you sharing this intimate experience with him was enough to make him let go right then and there, but the fact that it wasn’t a thought and was actually happening right now was what he couldn’t believe. 

“You like that?” you smirked as you turned his head back to look up at you, the heat in your stomach rising as his hands wandered along your body. You felt him give your breast a gentle squeeze at the same time as you felt him hit a spot inside you he hadn’t before.

“O- oh my god,” you whimpered as you fell forward onto him, his hands holding you tightly as he pushed your lips against his in a messy kiss.

“I’m fucking obsessed with you,” Joe mumbled between the kiss, your moans coming out in short gasps as you felt him buck his hips into yours. 

Every word that came from his mouth set your heart on fire. Every time he touched you, you felt electricity run through your veins. Every time he looked at you with those eyes filled with love and passion, you felt like his soul was hugging yours. 

Every time you looked at him with the same love and passion, he felt his heart explode. Every time you touched him, he felt like he was in heaven. Every time his name left your lips, he fell more in love with you. 

“Ah, fuck. Joe, you’re s- you’re so..” you whimpered before you went back to the kiss as you rode him into oblivion.

You pulled away and sat up again, this time moving back and forth even faster as he thrusts up into you. “Mmph, Joey,” you whimpered as you placed your hands on his, which were gripping your waist. This felt better than either of you could’ve ever imagined, both of you also mentally cursed yourselves out for missing out on this for so long. 

“I’m close,” Joe groaned, feeling himself hurdle towards his pleasure; the feeling of your warm cushiony walls wrapped around him was the greatest thing he’d ever felt. 

You nodded, placed your palms back on his chest, and bounced back against him even harder even though your legs started to get tired. Joe started to press kisses along your hands and your arms as you continued to ride him, “You’re doing so good, baby,” he praised, which sent you closer to your orgasm as the band in your belly was tightening.

“Joe,” you whimpered, your legs starting to burn as you slowed down. 

“It’s okay, I’m here,” he said as he gripped your hips and guided you along his thick shaft, taking the weight off of you and giving you some rest. He then moved his hands under your thighs and started snapping his hips up into your soaked core, both of you just moments away from fully letting go. One particular hard thrust stroked your G-spot and had you screaming once again.

“Mm..Joe, I’m gonna.. cum,” you moaned as your chest heaved from the intense pleasure you were feeling in your body. 

“Fuck, me too,” he whimpered as he snapped his hips up into yours again, this time your release washing over you.

“Joe,” you screamed as you felt the band in your belly snap and your walls tighten around him, your body falling forward onto him again. He drapes his arm around your back and pulls you closer as you moan into his ear, the aftermath of your release hitting you like a brick wall.

“Fuck, I’m cumming,” Joe rasped as he felt you move your face to his face, your lips crashing down on him as he released inside of you, the kiss being interrupted by his moans which came out in sharp breaths. 

A few minutes later, he was holding you so incredibly close to him as both of you spent a few moments catching your breaths and coming down from your intense highs. The only sounds in the room are your steady breaths; the quietness and his warm body are incredibly comforting. You were laying your head against his chest, feeling his hand play with the strands of your hair while you lightly scratched his chest before you heard him speak up.

“You are a dream that I never want to wake up from,”.

End of flashback 

Then it got worse (was it really a bad thing though?) after the first time you went down on him after you had one too many glasses of wine at lunch with your friends and he looked like a walking greek god when he came over to your place after practice.

Flashback to a few weeks ago

“You look prettyyy,” you giggled as you stared at Joe who was trying to eat the post-practice salad you made him but couldn’t focus on because of how intensely you were staring at him. 

“Are you okay?” he asked, raising an eyebrow and taking a slow bite of the salad.  

“I’m greattttt,” you slurred as you leaned back in your chair. 

“Uh-huh,” he nodded. “What’s my middle name?” he quizzed you.

You rolled your eyes and laughed, “I said I’m great, Joseph Lee Burrow. I just had a few glasses of wine earlier at lunch with the girls so I’m a little tipsy,”. 

“How many is a few…,” he bit his lip as he watched you struggle to remember.

“Uhh, no comment,” you grinned at him as you got up from your chair. “But I’m 100% sober when I say you look absolutely amazing right now,” you smiled when you walked over to him, pulled his chair out a bit, and then sat down in his lap and pressed your crotch against his. His big hands instinctively settled on your ass as you looped your arms around his neck.

“I’m really sweaty right now,” he nervously cleared his throat.

“I don’t care,” you said as you pressed delicate kisses along his face. “You look, feel, and taste amazing,” you mumbled as you moved down to his neck, licking a stripe along his jawline and tasting the salty sweat on his skin.

“What’s gotten into you,” he chuckled as he moved your head back into his view. 

“Ask the media admin who posted quite a few pictures and videos of you from practice today,” you giggled. “You looked hot,”. 

“Looked? Damn, am I not hot right now?” he playfully pouted. 

“You know you are,” you said, sending him a heated look. “I’ve dreamed about you in this cut-off white shirt quite a few times over the years,” you winked as you traced his chest through the loose shirt that barely covered his chiseled body.

“Jesus, you are drunk as hell,” Joe laughed while throwing his head back. 

“Shut up,” you smiled while grabbing his head and pressing your lips against his, the kiss quickly becoming more heated as he began to rock your hips back and forth against his growing erection. 

“Mmph,” you moaned into the kiss as he was grinding you against him, the hardness underneath you sending shivers down your spine.

“I think we should take this to the bedroom,” he mumbled as he started placing open-mouthed kisses along your jawline.

You let out a heavy sigh, “I’d love to but I got my period this morning,”.

“That’s great,” he grinned as he moved his head back up to yours.

“What…” you asked, as you tilted your head out of confusion.

“I mean, that sucks because of cramps and all that annoying period stuff. But that’s great because it means there’s no bun in the oven,” he softly laughed. “Yet, at least,” he muttered under his breath, just loud enough for him to hear.

“That is true,” you nodded as you fell forward and wrapped your arms around his neck, his arms wrapping around you in a warm hug. You stuffed your neck into his neck, smelling his natural pheromones from his sweat which combined with the hardness you felt under you was adding to the tension you were feeling right now. 

“But that doesn’t mean I can’t make you feel good,” you whispered in his ear, Joe’s heart stopped when he realized what you were saying. 

“I….,” he trailed off, his heart beat picking up again and his palms getting sweaty. 

You pulled away from the hug and met his eyes, flashing him a sweet smile before speaking up. “I’m serious, Joe. Let me make you feel good,” you said as you traced his arm all the way up to his face. 

His silence started to worry you and you felt yourself getting nervous again, just like how you did when it was the first time you two did anything intimate. “Unless you don’t want to,” you quickly said as you started getting off his lap, but his big hands wrapped around you and pulled you back down. 

"It’s not that I don’t want to. God, I want to,” he laughed. “It’s just…I don’t want you to do something if you’re not comfortable with it and won’t enjoy it yourself,” he said as he cupped your cheek and rubbed his thumb against your skin.

You grabbed his hand and pressed a kiss to the inside of his hand, “I want to,” you nodded. “I really want to,” you mumbled as you leaned forward again and crashed your lips against his. 

After a few minutes of teasing him with your kisses and your touch, you slid off of him and got on your knees in front of his chair. You used your hands and spread his legs open before you looked back up at him, his eyes darkened with lust as he bit his lip. 

You smirked at him as you leaned forward to pull his shorts and boxers, after which his impressive erection sprang free. You ran your manicured hands along his thick, muscular thighs as you slowly leaned down and wrapped your lips around his shaft.

Joe closed his eyes as he felt you take him deeper and deeper with each bob of your head, “Fuck, Y/N,” he whispered. You moved your lips back to the tip, pulling them off with an audible pop as you licked a stripe across his red tip, tasting the bit of pre-cum that was pooling. 

He let out another low moan once you wrapped your lips around him again and slowly moved down his cock. You started bobbing your head up and down, more sounds of pleasure leaving Joe’s lips as you used your hand to give him a few pumps while you worked your way down.

“Mm, Y/N,” he whimpered as you felt his hands in your hair, your eyes navigating up to his eyes which once again were telling you what he was thinking without him actually saying it. You squeezed his thigh in response as you went back to what you were doing, Joe’s hands gently pushing you down further as you moaned against him.

A few minutes later, you moved off his cock and kept eye contact with him while you jerked him off with your hand as you used your other one to wipe the saliva around your lips, a smirk on your lips as you saw his blissful facial expression; the way he was biting his lips, his tired eyes filled with lust and love, and the way his hand was lovingly rubbing your head. You moved back down after a few seconds, teasing the slit with your tongue and licking a stripe down the side before you took him in your mouth again. 

“F-Fuck,” he moaned once he felt the tip hit the back of your throat. He looked down at you with his tired eyes and couldn’t believe that this was really happening. He physically could not get enough of you; not now, not ever. Joe began bucking his hips up a few moments later, the feeling in his belly getting stronger as you got sloppy with your movements. His hand started pushing you down harder, your moans and whimpers being muffled because you had him in your mouth. Tears started coming down your cheeks as he started to thrust into your mouth and when you looked up at him, you knew he was close. 

“God damn..you’re so fucking good at this,” he moaned as you massaged his balls using your free hand, Joe just mere moments away from reaching his high. 

A few more heated moments later, you felt ropes of warm cum shoot down your throat. “Y/N…” he moaned while throwing his head back. It really couldn’t get better than this for Joe. He was already obsessed with you as a person, but now he was obsessed with you physically. 

You continued to bob up and down his shaft, making sure to milk every last drop of his orgasm before you released him from your mouth, then swallowing his sweet release as you looked into his heavy eyes. 

“You are insane,” he panted as his chest heaved, a thin coating of sweat on both of your skins because of your actions. 

“I know,” you cockily grinned as you wiped his release off your lips with the back of your fingers before licking them clean.

End of flashback 

After that, it was the two of you going at it in the backseat of his Porsche after a post-practice dinner with some of the guys and their significant others. That compression shirt he had on was sending you into overdrive and the way you were teasing each other the entire time was making it worse. 

Flashback to the night out with your friends 

You were in dire need of a cold shower right now. 

You were trying so hard to keep yourself together as you were currently at dinner with Joe and a few of his friends from the team (who at this point were also your friends). But the man sitting next to you was making it incredibly difficult for you to act normal. 

First, it was the fact that he picked you up after practice and he was just in his skin-tight compression shirt and his workout shorts, which he was still wearing at dinner. He knew this combination always made you feel certain feelings and normally he would change out of these clothes after practice was over, but he was doing this on purpose because he knew you were going to see it. The top highlighted his delicious biceps and hugged his body so tightly that his chiseled figure was on full display; he was mouthwatering and he knew it too. 

Then, it was the fact that ever since you sat down at the table with your friends for dinner, he’d been sneakily teasing you with little touches and glances that he knew drove you wild. Nobody in the room knew you were dating so it should make sense as to why you were struggling to keep it together.  

You felt his hand creep up to your thigh, his big hand seductively massaging the skin as you took a bite of your meal while intensely staring at him. 

“So, Y/N. How does it feel being Joe’s honorary girlfriend,” Jermaine teased as he took a sip of his water. 

You flipped your head from Joe to him as you felt your heart stop in your chest. “What?” you deadpanned. 

“Burrow over here can’t seem to keep a girl around to save his life,” Tee laughed as he watched Joe roll his eyes.

“Correction, he can’t keep a girl other than Y/N around,” Ja’marr nodded. “She been with him since day 1. Why? I have no fucking idea but he’s managed to keep her around somehow,”.

“It must be because of…,” Tee teased as he pointed down to his crotch, your eyes widening and cheeks turning red at the embarrassing situation you were in right now. 

“You guys are children,” Joe shook his head as he moved his hand to cup your mound through your skirt, your eyes widening again as you flipped your head over to him. Now was not the time to be doing this, not in front of everyone. 

You grabbed his forearm and scooched his hand back over to his lap before speaking up, “Maybe the reason he can’t keep a girl around is because of his bad timing,” you said while shooting daggers at him with your eyes and emphasizing the ‘bad timing’ part.  

“Um, ouch?” Joe raised an eyebrow and bumped your leg with his. 

“Damnnn, even she sees it,” Jermaine laughed. “But Y/N, you gotta admit. You kinda are the honorary girlfriend at this point. They need to add you to the WAG’s list or something,”. 

“She knows she just won’t admit it,” Ja’marr pointed out. “Must be an ego thing,”.

“Ouch?” you said, acting like you were offended by that. You then felt Joe’s foot bump into yours, but not by accident. You looked over at him and saw the smug grin on his face as he continued to rub his foot, then his leg against yours underneath the table in a way that sent shivers throughout your body. 

“He wants to play? Let’s play,” you thought to yourself. 

You cleared your throat before turning back over to face the guys, “You know, maybe Joe can’t keep a girl around because he’s bad in bed?” you boldly said as you moved your hand to his lap, gently grabbing his cock through his shorts which made him jerk up in his seat. 

“No way,” Tee said before he fell into a fit of laughter.

“I’m serious,” you shrugged as you gave Joe a squeeze through his shorts, hearing him softly groan next to you. “Sex is very important to girls. The whole intimacy and love aspect of it is very important for relationship development,” you nodded. “Maybe Joe just sucks at it,” you smirked as you looked over at him, his cheeks flushed as he was biting his lip.

Oh, he definitely didn’t suck. If he got any better at it you would probably have a stroke. 

“Damn, you really gonna let your girl do you like that?” Ja’marr said to Joe. 

“She can do whatever she wants,” Joe said, giving you a heated look as he stared intensely at your eyes and then your plump pink lips that were covered with peach lip gloss. 

“Whatever I want, huh?” you wiggled your eyebrows at him as you let go of his dick and slid your hand along his thick muscular thigh. “Okay, then I think the guys would just love to hear about how you almost threw up on one of your hookups back at Ohio State and how you had to text me to come save your ass while I was in the middle of a date. When I showed up she thought I was his girlfriend and he was cheating on me,” you giggled. “It was a whole improv routine, I swear,”. 

“But you still came anyway,” Joe said, staring deeply into your eyes. “You always showed up whenever I needed you,” he said a little quieter, but his words were incredibly loud and clear. You always showed up for him in every shape and form possible, and now that you were together, that would never change.

“Y/N, we coulda used you down at LSU for real,” Ja’marr nodded. “You’re the only one that can keep Shiesty over here from completely embarrassing himself and the only one that can keep him in check,”. 

“Ohhh, I know,” you grinned. “I do a really good job at keeping him in check,” you winked at the guys as you gave Joe’s thigh a loving squeeze.

An hour later 

After the dinner, you both got into Joe’s sleek black porche and were on your way back to his house, the tension in the car growing as you two sat in silence and had not mentioned a word about the shenanigans at dinner. The only sounds in the car were the song playing on the aux–Kiss It Better by Rhianna–and the sounds of the car moving. 

You glanced over at him, taking in his muscular and hypnotizing body. The way his jaw was clenching as he focused on the road, the way his veiny hands that you loved to feel on your body gripped the steering wheel, the way the tight compression shirt fit him like another skin, the way his thick muscular thighs were spread open, and the way his plump bottom lip was in between his teeth. You needed him so badly and the teasing at dinner made it worse.

Joe felt your eyes on him so he turned over to look at you, but you quickly turned your head away and continued to look out your window, praying he didn’t notice you looking at him but you were too late. He slowly swallowed as he stared at your perfect body. The way your delicate eyelashes were fluttering as you stared out at the road, your glossy pink lips that he wanted to feel against his so badly right now, the way your cropped sweater was hugging your perfect hips and breasts, the way your freshly manicured hands that he loved to feel in his hair and along his back were gripping your phone. You looked incredible and he felt a visceral ache inside of him because of how badly he needed you right now. 

“Just take it on back, boy, take it on back, boy. Take it back all night. Just take it on back, take it on back. Mmm, do what you gotta do, keep me up all night,” you mumbled as you bobbed your head to the song, slowly turning your head over to look at Joe, finally your eyes meeting his heated gaze.

“You’re staring,” you whispered as you felt your heart rate ramp up and your stomach do a backflip. 

“I know,” he breathed out as he flipped his head back to the road, the sign for the nearest exit getting closer as he switched lanes to get to the exit lane. You were confused as to why he was going this way since this wasn’t the way back home, but you didn’t say anything because your brain was slowly being clouded by lust and desire. 

You watched as he sped slightly, his grip on the steering wheel becoming tighter which made more of the veins along his muscular arm pop. Your eyes then fell down to his lap, the tent in his shorts incredibly prominent which made you smile knowing the effect you had on him. 

He quickly pulled into the most empty parking lot possible, your mind finally realizing why he was doing this and a gush of wetness pooling your core at the thought of it. He quickly put the car in park and turned it off before looking over at you, “Backseat?” he breathlessly asked, his voice thick with infatuation. 

“Absolutely,” you grinned as you quickly got out of the passenger side and slipped into the spacious backseat of his Porsche, Joe following you.  

“Thank god for tinted windows,” you giggled as Joe pulled you onto his lap, his big hands settling on either side of your hips as he smashed his lips against yours. 

“I need you so bad,” he said as he pressed kisses along your cheeks and jawline. 

“I’m right here,” you whispered as you leaned back to look at him, his hands instantly pulling you back forward as he smashed his lips against yours again, this time his tongue invading your mouth as he started to peel off your top. 

You flung it to the side before pulling your skirt off, then returning to the kiss while you felt his hands wander along your back before unclasping your bra. You let the straps fall as he slipped it off for you, you leaned back again as Joe peppered kisses along your collarbone down to your breasts, lightly nipping and sucking on them before kissing his way back up to your lips. You began to grind down on his crotch which made him moan into the kiss, his fingers slowly peeling your lace panties off. You quickly moved to the side to get them off faster before coming back into his lap.

“Leave this on,” you mumbled, pointing to his tight compression shirt.

“Whatever you want,” he said, getting lost in your beautiful eyes. 

“I want these off though,” you giggled, pointing down at his shorts and boxers.

“Oh, right,” he said, snapping out of his daze. He picked himself up and pulled both down at once, his erection springing free as you quickly gave him a few pumps before lining him up with your already wet core. 

You smashed your lips against him as you slowly slid down his thick shaft, the feeling of him inside of you was something that you could never get tired of. “Joe,” you moaned against his lips, the way he was stretching you out was sending you right to the edge. 

“Fuck, Y/N,” he whimpered as you started moving against him, his hands landing on your hips as he started to help you move. 

You put on of your hands in his dirty blonde curls, softly pulling at the strands as you picked up your pace. You moved your lips down to his neck where you spent a few moments sucking on his soft skin which was sure to leave a pretty purple mark

“You feel so good,” he breathed out as his head fell back. You continued to move up and down him, the car filling with breathy moans and skin slapping which made you both even more desperate for more. 

Joe wrapped his arms around your torso and started snapping his hips up into you, the sudden change of pace causing you to topple over and your hand to slide against the car window. “F- Fuck, oh my god,” you whined as you leaned on him, the new angle causing him to reach new spots inside of you.

“You like that?” he whispered in your ear.

“Mmhm,” you breathlessly nodded as he continued to rapidly thrust into your slick core. 

A few moments later, you leaned back again and placed both hands on either side of his shoulders as you started to rock your hips back and forth. This new movement made Joe lose it.

“Fuck, I can’t..That’s it...That’s my girl,” he whimpered as he gripped your waist tightly, his brain fully fogged and the heat in his belly getting stronger. 

The words that were coming from his mouth and the tension in your belly increasing made you lose it. “Joe, I’m so close,” you moaned as you felt your walls slowly tighten around his cock. 

He moved a hand down to where you two were connected, the mere sight of that drove him crazy let alone the feeling of being connected. He started rubbing circles around your sensitive clit, giving it a few rubs and then a gentle pinch which sent you right to the edge. “Oh my god,” you screamed, your high hitting you like a ton of bricks.

“I’m close,” he groaned as he began snapping his hips up into you again, your walls squeezing him in the best way possible as the wetness below you increased. 

“J-Joe,” you whimpered as you leaned back, your high still washing over you as he continued to push deeper inside of you. 

“I’m about to cum,” he moaned as he ran his veiny hands along the sides of your thighs.

“S- Shit..pull out,” you panted as you looked down at him.

“Why?” he breathed out as he met your tired eyes.

“J-Joe, fuck…cum on my stomach,” you moaned as you placed your hand on his chest. 

Joe stared at you in awe for a few seconds. He had never seen you like this before, but he loved it. He loved this side of you and he loved you. He nodded as he stopped his movements and easily slipped out of you, the loss of contact making you squirm in his lap, “Shit,” you whimpered as you felt your release seeping onto him.

He gave himself a few pumps as he watched you catch your breath, your gorgeous body glistening because of the light coming into the car from the street lights. A few seconds later thick ropes of cum spilled out onto your belly, the sight making you feel euphoric. “Y/N,” he moaned as his head fell back again. 

You looked back up at him and grabbed his head so that he was looking at you, “Look at me,” you panted as you felt him release more ropes of his pearly cum onto you while the rest was dripping down your belly. 

“You are amazing,” you grinned as you pulled his head forward and captured his lips in a heated kiss as he fell back into the seat with you closely pressed against him, your lips moving against each other in a sensual tango.

After a few minutes of catching your breaths and whispering sweet nothings into each other’s ears, you spoke up. “Sooo, are we going to talk about earlier?”.

“I think we just did,” he smiled at you, referring to what just transpired in the backseat of his car. 

End of flashback 

Then it was your best friend Lydia (the only one who knew about you two since she picked you up from his house the morning after the christmas party) catching on to what you two were up to which resulted in you fawning over how amazing it was to her. 

Flashback to the phone call

“Sooo, how is it,” she asked through the phone, you could practically feel the smirk on her face. “And I’m asking because this time I know for sure you’ve had sex with him,”.

“How can you be so sure?” you giggled as you fell back against your soft sheets. 

“Nobody, and I mean Nobody is going to believe the lame-ass excuse you gave me about building Ikea furniture at Joe’s house as to why you couldn’t Facetime me earlier. You wouldn’t be caught dead within 5 feet of a hammer and an instruction manual. You weren’t building a bed, you were probably breaking it,” she teased.

“Lydia!” you screamed as your jaw dropped, you couldn’t help but laugh at the silliness of it all. You both were truly making up for lost time with how your relationship was developing, doing everything you wish you could’ve done with each other in college. 

“Soo,” she said, expecting more from you.

“Fine,” you laughed. “It’s really really really good,”.

“Like how good?” she asked.

“Hmmm, as good as a bottle of cold water at 3 in the morning,” you smiled.

“Damnnn, okay Joe,” Lydia laughed.

“He’s so comforting and gentle with everything. He talks me through it all, says the sweetest things to me, looks at me like I'm the rarest diamond in the world, and showers me with all the love in the world. He always ensures I’m fine and wants to do it as much as he does. It’s just so perfect,” you said as you flipped over onto your stomach and started moving your feet back and forth like a child.

“Aww,” she cooed. 

“But he’s also very good at everything he does, never makes me feel unsatisfied or unappreciated...There's a side to him that is less lover and more motivated by raw desire. I think if he got even better at it, I would have a stroke,” you blushed. “Just know I have a bottle of Advil on standby because…Damn,” you giggled.

“I love this for you. He sounds like everything you needed in your life,” she said. 

“I’m really happy, Lydia. Like I don’t know what I did to deserve him, but I can’t get enough,” you said as you felt your heart skip a beat. 

“Lovergirl finally got her Loverboy. All is right in the world,” she smiled through the phone. “You two are tooth rottingly adorable and sweet,”. 

“Adorable, sweet, desperate, horny. We’re a mix of a lot of things,” you laughed as you stuffed your face into the pillow.

End of flashback 

“Good god, someone please spray us with anti-horny spray,” you laughed as you felt yourself getting worked up. 

You took everything off and put it back in its spots before you put your clothes back on and turned the closet light off. You walked into the bathroom to do your nightly routine of brushing your teeth and washing your face before getting comfy in his bed. 

You pulled up his contact and looked over at the time, “He’s probably still awake,” you said as you clicked on the photos you took earlier and sent them to him. “Hopefully he’s alone,” you laughed when you realized how embarrassed he’d be if he opened these photos around others. 

You turned the TV and put on a movie as you set your phone to the side, a few moments later the screen lit up with texts from Joe.

Joe: holy fuck 

Joe: holy fuckkkkkkk baby 

Joe: you look so sexy what the fuck.

Joe: you doing this to me knowing i’m a good 30 minutes away and can’t leave is criminal. 

You: doing what?

Joe: Y/N.

You: fineeee. i just wanted to show my appreciation and since you’re not here this was my best option.. 🤷‍♀️

Joe: that necklace looks even better on you than it does me. and that hat too. god, you’re so pretty

You: thank youuu but that necklace was about to break my neck. don’t know how you do it 

Joe: i’m glad you put it on though. you look hot as fuckkkk. i’m struggling to keep it together right now 

You: settle down QB. you have a game tomorrow, save that energy for the field 

Joe: just wait until after the game. im getting my appreciation in person too, i’m making sure of it

You: only if you win for me 

Joe: you got it gorgeous 

You: you should probably go to sleep now, you need to get your full beauty sleep 

Joe: you’re probably right

Joe: i miss you 

You: miss you too, J

Joe: i’ll see you in the morning. i love you and thanks for that treat :)

You: i love you more and of course. just don’t have too many scandalous dreams or you’re going to wake up frazzled  

Joe: no promises.. i have hot ass girlfriend so my brain has a mind of its own

You: night joey

Joe: night sexy ;)

You smile as you put your phone on the nightstand and turn the TV off before turning the lights off. You got comfy under the covers and laid your head against his pillows, his natural scent lingering on them making you smile as you closed your eyes and fell asleep.

The next morning 

You felt a pair of soft lips press delicate kisses along your face, your eyes slowly fluttering open as you saw Joe sitting on the bed next to you with a huge smile on his face. “Morning, sunshine,” he smiled as he moved your hair out of your eyes before kissing your lips.

You quickly scooched up and pulled him in for a hug, “Mmm, morning. I missed you,” you said as you pressed lazy kisses along his neck. 

“How did it feel being the lady of the house while I was gone,” he laughed before kissing your cheek and pulling away from the hug. 

“Good,” you yawned as you stretched your arms out. “I think I’ll do just fine here,” you smiled. 

“Amazing,” he smiled before leaning forward and pressing two sweet kisses to your forehead, a soft laugh coming from your lips because of his sweet actions, and also because you remembered the first time he kissed your forehead. Forehead kisses were one of your favorites, so sweet and intimate.  

“Why are you laughing,” he said while raising an eyebrow.

“That forehead kiss,” you smiled. 

“What about it?” he questioned.

“Reminds me of the first time you kissed my forehead. Remember? Back at my apartment when you showed up with a bunch of goodies to cheer me up after the shitty day I had,”.

“Of course, I remember,” he nodded as he laced his fingers with yours and played with the ring on your left hand. “That was also the first time you kissed my neck,”.

Joe loved it when you kissed his neck, it felt so comforting and sweet; just like you. 

“I never did ask you why you kissed my forehead, Did I?” you asked him.

“Nope,” he shook his head.

“Well, why did you? You never kissed my forehead, even when I had breakdowns worse than that,” you wondered. 

“I kind of had a feeling that you were crying for another reason. A reason you couldn’t tell me about. You were crying because of our relationship, weren’t you?” he asked as he looked up. 

You nodded, “Yeah..I was getting in my head about the whole thing and the possibility of screwing everything up and losing you,” you sighed, dropping your head. 

“But you didn’t,” he said as he moved your head back up. “You didn’t lose me and you won’t lose me,” he smiled. “I kissed your forehead because I actually wanted to kiss your lips, but I couldn’t. I kissed your forehead also because I knew what forehead kisses meant to you and I guess that was my way of showing my love without actually saying it,”. 

“Well, I definitely felt loved in that moment,” you grinned as you leaned forward to kiss him.

“Wait, but why did you kiss my neck? You’d never done that before either,” he asked. 

“Honestly? I don’t know. I think my body knew how much I needed you before my mind did,” you giggled. “It felt right for some reason,”.

“I like that,” he smiled. “It feels right,”.

“Mhmmm,” you giggled as you leaned forward to kiss his neck again. 

“You should go get ready. I’ll grab us breakfast on the way to the stadium,” he smiled.

“So early? The game isn’t until 4:25,” you said while rubbing your eyes.

“Yeah, I know. But since it’s the first playoff game, they want us there early. My parents are going to be there to keep you company too so you won’t get bored. You can explore the stadium if you want as well,” he said as he got up from the bed. “But I think you’d get bored of that since you’ve been coming to every home game for the past few years,”.

“Yeahhh,” you smiled as you got up. “It’s good though. I love catching up with Jimmy and Robin so I’ll be fine,”.

“They do love you a lot,” he smiled as he pulled you in for another hug, your chin resting against his chest as you looked up at him.

“Good thing I love them and their golden baby a lot too,” you smiled before pressing a big, passion-filled kiss to his lips and quickly pulling away from him. 

“Teaseeee,” he laughed and shook his head as you walked into the bathroom with a smirk on your face. 

A little while later, you walked downstairs after getting ready and saw Joe facing the kitchen as he was seated on the barstool and scrolling on his phone. He heard your footsteps behind him so he turned around, his jaw on the floor once he saw you. 

You were wearing baggy black leather cargo pants, a tight skin-fit orange crop top, a ‘Burrow’-themed bomber jacket, and his smaller ‘9’ necklace. Your shoes were orange and black, a little ‘9’ carved in on the sides. 

“Y/N…” he said as he got up, watching you do a little twirl as you walked over to him.

“You like?” you smiled.

“I love,” he said as he took in your outfit again. “That’s my girl,” he smiled as he touched the smaller iced-out ‘9’ chain around your neck. 

“I hope it’s not too much. I wanted to make my first official appearance as Joe Burrow’s girlfriend a good one,” you said as you bit your lip.

“It’s perfect. You look absolutely stunning,” he said, sealing his words with a kiss. “I’ve dreamed of this, seeing you wearing my number as my girlfriend and not just my best friend,”.

“I’m glad I could make it come true,” you giggled. “Oh wait! I almost forgot something,” you froze. 

“What? I don’t see how you could make this better than it already is,” he laughed as he admired your sick jacket. 

You winked at him as you pulled up your pants, showing your socks off to him. “One sock inside out,”. 

Joe’s heart skipped a beat when he saw the inside-out sock. He had been wearing one of his socks inside out since his early college days, a pre-game ritual that had become a tradition for him every time he stepped out on the field. The fact that you were partaking in this with him made his heart flutter, the fact that you remembered made his heart flutter. 

“Y- You remembered,” he mumbled as he looked up at you with his soft eyes. 

“Of course, I remembered,” you said while gently punching his shoulder. “This is one thing that makes you, you. You’re still the same guy you were all those years ago and the fact that you still do these things is adorable,” you grinned, your hand going into your pocket as you reached for something.

“Aaandd, almost forgot this too,” you said as you handed him a Caramel Apple sucker which was a part of another pre-game ritual of his. 

Joe laughed as he took the sucker from your hand, “You’re incredible, you know that?” Joe smiled. 

“No, you’re incredible,” you giggled while you kissed his smooth cheek. He meant the world to you, so doing these things for him was a given. You wanted to make today as special as possible for the two of you.  

A few hours later 

“Are you excited, sweetie?” Robin eagerly asked as she patted your leg.

“Very excited. I can’t wait to see him out there,” you smiled at his parents as you all were sitting inside the Burrow suite. 

“Gosh, I still can't believe you two finally got together. We always knew Joe liked you but I thought he wouldn’t ever tell you since it had been so long,” Jimmy laughed.

“Joey always had a knack for taking his time with things. He always made sure it was the right time to do something, he was never one to rush things. And given how much he cares about you, him taking so long to tell you how he felt made sense,” Robin smiled. “He really cares about you. Just the way he looks at you says everything and more,”.

“The way he was looking at you the night you both told us just gave it away,” Jimmy smiled.

Flashback to when You and Joe told his parents about you two (a couple days after your sister’s wedding)

“And then she just fell right into the waiter and got tequila all over her dress,” Joe laughed as he finished telling his parents about your 21st birthday mishap. 

“We’ve all been a little clumsy when we’re drunk, Joe,” you giggled as you absentmindedly placed your hand on top of his.

Robin’s eyes darted down to both of your hands, she looked at Jimmy through the corner of her eye, a smile on both their faces as they stayed silent.

“Don’t even get me started on the time I had to nurse you back from the massive hangover you got after Lydia’s birthday,” you giggled as you looked at him like you were the only two in the room. “It was brutal,” you smiled as you moved your hand off of his and rubbed his shoulder with your hand. 

Joe’s parents had noticed your behaviors as soon as you both walked through the door. Ever since you got here, you both had been extra giggly and touchy with each other. Whether it was the accidental (but not so accidental) touches when you were putting food on your plates, the little glances at each other that you two had thought you were doing a good job at hiding, or the way you were laughing extra hard at everything Joe said. You were even laughing at things that weren’t even that funny. 

They also noticed the way Joe was looking at you the entire time. His eyes were so clearly filled with love and infatuation, a look in his eyes that they had never seen in him before until now. He did a bad job of hiding it because he was so damn in love with you that it was literally oozing out of him and everyone could see. 

“And that is why I don’t drink that much anymore,” Joe smiled as he placed his arm around the back of your chair, his hand just inches from your shoulder. “Take a page out of my book,”. 

“Don’t need to tell me twice,” you said as you pushed away your wine glass. “I’m gonna use the bathroom real quick,” you said to everyone as you got up from your chair, your hand squeezing Joe’s shoulder as you walked behind him to get to the hallway where the bathroom was.

Joe watched as you walked away, his eyes filled with adoration as his face had the biggest smile on it. He turned back to look at his parents, both of them staring at him like he had something to tell them.

“What?” Joe laughed as he leaned forward to grab his water glass.

“Nothing,” Jimmy shook his head and looked over at Robin who had a skeptical look on her face.

“Okayyyy,” Joe said, a little suspicious of his parents' behavior but decided not to think much about it. “I’m gonna go grab something from my old room, I'll be back,” Joe lied as he got up from his seat.

He didn’t need to grab something from his old room, but he did need to see you alone and this was the best chance he had all night to do so. 

Joe walked over to the bathroom you were in and softly knocked on the door. “Just a minute,” you said as you were fixing your hair in the mirror. 

Joe rolled his eyes and knocked harder this time, “It’s me,” he said. 

You rolled your eyes and unlocked the door for him before going back to fixing your hair in the mirror, “Jeez, if you had to go so bad why didn’t you go to the other bathroom,”.

Joe quickly slipped inside and closed the door behind him, locking the door and then turning back to you. He wrapped his arms around your waist from behind and rested his chin on your shoulder. You looked down at him through the mirror, noticing his almost tired-looking face. “You okay, J?” you softly asked him as you moved your hand to his hair, ruffling the curls a little. His sudden need to be attached to you was slightly worrying. 

“I’m great. I just miss being close to you,” he said as he pressed a kiss to your shoulder. 

“We’ve only been here for a couple of hours,” you giggled as you turned around in his hold, your body now facing him. 

“I know, it’s just annoying not being able to touch you like how I should be touching you in front of everyone,” he sighed as he ran his hands up and down your arms. 

“I know,” you nodded, feeling bad that you were being secretive about your relationship even though this was something you both decided you wanted to do for a bit even though that was coming to a close. Your family already found out (on accident obviously) and Joe’s family did not; hiding it from them was becoming difficult. 

“But, this will do for now,” Joe smiled as he lifted your face to his, capturing your sweet lips in a gentle kiss. You instantly melted into his touch like you were a piece of gourmet chocolate on his tongue, your arms looped around his neck as you felt him lift you up onto the bathroom counter. You spread your legs open to accommodate his large body as you wrapped them around him, your fingers threading through his dirty blonde curls as his tongue invades your mouth and you two get lost in each other’s touch. 

You spent a few minutes making out in the bathroom before you had to stop so that his parents didn’t get suspicious, even though they already were. You quickly fixed yourselves in the mirror before Joe opened the door for you to leave the bathroom, then followed you out. You both turned to walk back to the dining room but froze in your tracks as you saw both of his parents standing at the end of the hallway with their jaws on the floor.

“Are you fucking kidding me,” Joe whispered to you.

“What the hell is it with us and getting caught leaving a room together after doing something scandalous,” you whispered back, this was the same way your sister found out about you and Joe. The Universe was really messing with you at this point. 

“I promise this isn’t what it looks like,” Joe said louder to his parents as they walked closer to you.

“Yeah,” you laughed. “Joe, just uh…needed to talk to me about something,” you lied.

“About what?” Robin raised an eyebrow and looked at you both. 

“Uhhh, umm,” Joe mumbled as he struggled to come up with an excuse. 

“About a girl,” you chimed in, all 3 of their heads flipping over to you. 

“A girl?” Jimmy gasped. 

“A girl?” Joe whispered under his breath. You really couldn’t come up with another excuse? Now he had to lie about having some random girl in his life when the only girl in his life was you. 

“Yeah,” you cleared your throat and said. “He needed some advice,” you reassuringly nodded. 

“Advice,” Robin said. “Joe needed advice about a girl from you? In the bathroom? Right now while you’re at dinner with us?” she asked, still not quite believing you.

“Uhh, yeah,” Joe nodded. “I needed to talk to her alone and this was the best way. I didn’t want to tell you guys anything yet,”.

“Looks like we were caught though,” you nervously fake-laughed as you grabbed onto his bicep, your heated touch sending visible shivers down his spine. 

“We really need to do better at hiding things,” Joe nervously laughed as he looked down at you, his arm moving up and wrapping around your shoulder. 

“I know right? We’re too old to be doing this sneaking around and getting caught thing,” you fake laughed again as you and Joe continued to have an improvised conversation to hopefully get his parents off your scent. 

You continued to go back and forth with the unbelievable lie, Robin and Jimmy both staring at each other with a growing smile on their faces. They knew something was up and you two were really bad liars. 

“Would you two just get together already!?” Robin loudly said as she looked at you guys. Both of you froze, stopped talking, and your eyes widened. 

“What?” Joe asked as he looked at his Mom.

“You heard her,” Jimmy nodded. 

“I think you guys have the wrong idea,” you said. “We’re just-,”.

“Friends?” Robin interrupted. “Y/N, I’ve heard you both say that for 9 years but every time I see you both together, you look like a typical couple,”. 

“Look at you two right now,” Jimmy said, pointing at your body language. Joe’s arm was wrapped around your shoulder and your body was tightly pressed next to his, both of you instantly moving away from each other once you noticed they were right. 

“Ever since you both walked in, we’ve seen the constant touches and looks and heard that never-ending laughter from both of you,” Robin noted. “And I know you two have always been like that, but this is that on steroids,”. 

“Robin’s right. You two are just extra happy and cheery around each other,” Jimmy stated. “Looks like a relationship glow to me,”.  

“Are we not allowed to be extra happy without it being weird?” Joe defensively asked as he ran his fingers through his hair. 

“You are allowed. It’s just a little too obvious now, you both clearly have a thing for each other,” Robin said, not giving up on her observations. “Joe, you literally look at her like she’s the rarest diamond in the world. I can see it in your eyes,”. 

“And Y/N, we can see the way you touch him and what your touch does to him,” Jimmy added. 

His parents really cracked the case open on their own; it didn’t help that you two were so bad at hiding your feelings for each other. You practically handed it to them.  

Joe was beginning to feel antsy as his parents continued going on about their observations. They were talking about how it’s been clear you both have had feelings for each other for years, how they are incredibly visible now more than ever, and how you should do something about it before you miss the opportunity and regret it for the rest of your life. You were attentively listening to them, but Joe was fully zoned out and restless.

“Fuck it,” Joe thought to himself as he looked at you. “They were bound to find out at some point. Let me save them the trouble,”.

He used his hand to turn your head to face him and instantly smashed his lips against yours and kissed you hungrily in front of his parents, both of you hearing gasps and laughter from them as you leaned into the kiss. After a few heated seconds, you both pulled away from each other. 

“Surprise,” he said as he looked back at his parents as you stood there speechless by his boldness. 

“I knew it,” Robin shrieked as she eagerly patted Jimmy's shoulders and jumped up and down. 

You looked over at Joe, your face still stunned at how everything did a full 360 within just a few seconds. “You’re insane,” you giggled as you dropped your head to his shoulder.

“Insanely in love with you,” he said as he kissed your forehead, his parents hearing and smiling even harder at you two. 

“You need to tell us everything right now or I’m throwing all of your old Lego sets into the fireplace,” Robin said with a stern look on her face. 

“Woah, no need to get crazy there Mom,” Joe laughed as Robin’s face quickly changed back to excited as she hugged you both.

“Finallyyyy,” she squealed. “You two are perfect for each other,”. 

“I can’t believe you just did that. I thought our lie was believable,” you shook your head up at Joe. 

“Believable in what dimension? That might’ve been the worst lie we’ve ever told,” Joe said as his Mom let go of you two and he pulled you into his arms. 

“He’s not wrong there,” Jimmy laughed. “Next time, choose a better one,”.

“Well sorry, I'm not used to lying about dating my best friend,” you playfully scoffed. 

“No need to lie anymore though,” he shrugged. “Time to openly show everyone how much I love you. I think I might buy a megaphone and shout it from the top of Paycor so everyone can hear about how I’m winning at life in the best way possible”.

“I love you” you smiled at him, your heart exploding at the thought of showing your deep love for one another to everyone. 

End of flashback 

“I can’t believe you guys came at us like detectives with your observations and everything,” you giggled as you sipped your water. 

“You two just suck at hiding it,” she smiled. “But true love is always hard to hide so that makes sense,” Robin laughed as she looked out onto the field and noticed the team coming out for pre-game warmups. “Oh, looks like it’s warmup time,”. 

You turned around and looked out on the field, seeing all the guys come out of the tunnel, then spotting Joe who was looking up at the suite. 

Robin noticed the smile on your face once you found Joe on the field, she rested her hand on your back and spoke up, “Go down there and see him,” she encouraged. 

“Are you sure?” you asked as you turned back to face her. 

“Absolutely. They won’t mind. I’ve done it a few times myself,” she nodded. 

You hesitated for a few seconds before getting up from your seat. It would be nice to see him down there before the crowds piled in and you were overwhelmed by thousands of fans. 

“Okay,” you breathed out. “I’ll be back,” you smiled as you walked around the table to the exit door. You walked around the concourses and slowly made your way down to the field level. You walked through the tunnel and made it onto the field a few minutes later, spotting Joe on the sideline sitting on the bench staring out onto the open field. 

He didn’t notice you coming over until you were just a few feet from him, his eyes widening and a smile popping up on his face as he saw you getting closer. “What’re you doing down here?”.

“I came to see you,” you grinned as you sat down next to him. 

“You keep surprising me. Now you’re willingly down here in front of everyone,” he laughed as he wrapped his arm around your shoulder and pulled you into his chest before dropping a kiss on your forehead. 

“I mean, I'm going to be down here before the game in front of like 60,000 people. This is nothing,” you smiled as he chuckled above you. “Care to tell me why you were lost in thought just now?” you asked him about why he was staring out onto the field in silence.

“Just taking it in,” he sighed. “It helps me calm my nerves and get my head straight,”. 

“Ah,” you nodded as you watched some of his teammates warm up. You couldn’t even imagine how loud the thoughts in his head were during game day but he still managed to go out there with the most calm attitude, you don’t know how he does it, but he manages to block everything out with a snap of his fingers. 

“Just know that I’m proud of you regardless of the outcome. I know I said you should win for me, but I want you to know that winning or losing doesn’t matter to me at all. I just want you to have fun out there and give it your best,” you said to him as you continued to stare out onto the field, feeling his hand squeeze your shoulder as you continued to calm him with your words. “You are an amazing Football player regardless and will continue to set the league on fire for many more years to come. If you lose tonight, it doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. You’re still building a legacy that nobody can undo,”. 

“I love you, baby,” he said to you with another kiss on your head, his heart and soul smiling because of your meaningful words. You always said the right thing at the right time. 

“I love you more,” you smiled as you kissed his neck and scooted closer to him, both of you enjoying this quiet and calm moment with each other before you were interrupted.

“Ooooo, Babbyyyy,” you heard a group of voices say ahead of you. It was Ja’marr, Tee, and Jermaine. 

“We gotta talk about this later, Y/N!” Tee screamed over at you.

“For real! Y'all can’t do this shit and not tell me until a whole ass month later,” Ja’marr yelled. 

“I called it,” Jermaine nodded. “Honorary girlfriend is the real girlfriend,” he said while giving you a thumbs up and a cheeky grin.

“You told them?” you asked as you looked over at Joe, both of your cheeks red from slight embarrassment. 

“I think they could’ve figured it out if they saw us sitting like this, but yeah, I told them earlier,” he laughed. 

“I can’t wait to hear what they have to say,” you blushed as you looked back over at the 3 men, watching as they teased you both with Cupid arrows and air kisses. “Ooooo, Babyyyyy indeed,” you softly laughed, remembering the first time you called each other ‘baby’.

Start of Flashback (early days of your relationship)

You were lying down on Joe’s bed, mindlessly scrolling through your phone as Joe was putting a few things away in his closet. You were so zoned out and unaware of your surroundings that you didn’t even realize when Joe came out of the closet and turned off the TV before turning around and looking at you. 

He didn’t say a word and you didn’t even notice, you just felt a growing weight on your body as Joe suddenly crawled up your body and laid on top of you. You lifted your arms out of the way to look at him, his head instantly finding his home on your chest as he wrapped his arms loosely around your torso. 

You placed your phone to the side as you wrapped your arms around him, one hand playing with the soft strands of his hair while the other one was rubbing his back. “You okay, J?” you softly asked him as you looked down at his adorable face, the ‘out of nowhere’ cuddling a new thing for you.

“Mhm,” he cutely mumbled against your skin, dropping a kiss to your chest before holding you tighter and getting comfy on your warm chest. 

You giggled at the sight of your 6’4, hunky, muscular, very manly, athletic, and strong Boyfriend melting into your body. He was already as adorable as they come but even more adorable whenever he acted like this.

“Why are you laughing?” he said while looking up at you.

“You just look so cute right now,” you smiled as you played with his hair, lightly scratching his scalp at the same time. 

“Thanks, pumpkin,” he said with flirtatious eyes.

“Pumpkin?” you asked, your nose scrunching up at the cringe word. 

“Yeah, muffin,” he laughed. 

“Joe, what are you doing?” you giggled 

“What do you mean, sweet pea?” he asked as he stuck out his tongue and laughed.

You looked at him with confusion before the lightbulb went off on your brain as to why he was calling you these weird names. Pet names, obviously. 

“Oh, sorry. You’re right, honeybun,” you said, trying to hold back a laugh. 

“It’s okay, Princess,” he smiled as you caught on to what he was doing, he used his hand to give your waist a loving squeeze.

You did like Princess though. That one sent butterflies around your body and made you feel warm inside. 

“So how was practice, Sweetie?” you giggled as you asked him. 

“Good as usual, lovebug,” he laughed against you, the pet names getting even more unserious as you both went on. 

“That’s great, Studmuffin,” you giggled again.

“My god, we’re so unserious,” Joe burst out laughing into your chest.

“I know,” you giggled as you threw your head back. “But I like the pet names idea you got going on. I really like Princess,”.

“Okay, what else do we have then, Princess,” he asked while lovingly gazing into your beautiful eyes. 

“Hmmm. There’s Bubs, Bae, Honey, Darling, Sweets…” you began to say.

“All those are cringe except for Sweets,” he laughed.

“Agreed,” you breathed out. “Ooo, what about loverboy?” you asked him as you continued to play with his soft hair.

“I like that, Sweets,” he smirked at you. 

“Good, loverboy,” you laughed again, a permanent smile slapped on your face because of Joe. He always had you extra giggly, smiley, and happy around him. His effect on you was unmatchable. 

“None of the other names feel super natural honestly. They feel weird,” you said as you pressed a kiss to his head.

“Agreed. I think we’re good with these ones,” he nodded.

These ones were good, but they still didn’t feel perfect. You needed something that naturally rolled off your tongues.  

“I still can't believe this is real life,” you contently sighed. “I feel like I’m a pinch away from waking up from this beautiful dream,”.

“Nobody’s pinching you because this isn’t a dream,” he said while kissing your chest again. “This is all real,”.

“I love my life,” you giggled again as you felt Joe press multiple kisses to your skin. 

“And I love you, baby,” Joe said, absentmindedly calling you ‘baby’ as he scooched up to be face to face with you, butterflies filling your body as he was showering you with all the love you deserved. 

“I love you more, baby,” you said while pressing a sweet kiss to his lips before suddenly pulling away. 

You just called each other baby without realizing it, but it was perfect. It was natural.

“Wait, that’s it,” you said as your heart skipped a beat. “Baby. That’s it, that’s the one,” you smiled at him.

“Baby,” he said, the word so easily rolling off his tongue. “Classics are always the best,” he nodded. 

“And it rolled off our tongues without any pre-planned effort,” you eagerly smiled. 

“Baby,” he whispered. “Baby, come here. Baby, where’s my sweatshirt? Baby, let’s go hook up in the storage closet,” Joe smiled as he tested out the name.

“Joe!” you shrieked as you playfully slapped his chest. 

“I’m sold. I love it,” he grinned. 

“Good. I love it too, Baby,” you smiled before you pulled him down for another passionate kiss. His arms wrapped around you as he pressed his body closely against yours, your heartbeats meshing together.

Sometimes home wasn’t four walls and a roof, it was 2 arms and a heartbeat.

End of flashback 

“Where’d you go?” Joe asked as he rubbed your shoulder, snapping you out of your flashback. 

“Hm? Oh, nothing,” you smiled at him as you played with his fingers. “Just thinking,”.

“Good things, I hope?” he said as he laid his head against yours.

“It’s always good things with you, don’t ever worry about that,” you smiled after you pressed a passionate kiss to his lips. 

“Joe! Come out here, we need you,” Tee yelled over as he motioned for Joe to come out on the field. 

“Sorry, Y/N!” he added. 

“No worries,” you yelled back before you looked over at Joe. “Duty calls, Quarterback,” you nodded at him.

“Unfortunately,” he sighed as he got up from the bench, extending his hand to help you up. “I’ll see you in a bit though?”.

“I’ll be right there, front and center,” you blushed as he pulled you in for a tight hug. 

“Make sure to wear the peach lipgloss,” he said as he dropped a kiss on your head before letting go of you and jogging out to the field. 

“Would never forget it,” you yelled out to him, watching him look back at you with an enamored look on his face. 

An hour later - Game Time

“Deep breath in, Deep breath out,” you thought to yourself as Joe’s parents led you down to the sideline family section. The air was electric, buzzing with the collective energy of thousands of fans. The shouting, cheers, and chants blend into a beautiful symphony of sound that vibrates through your chest. 

The bright lights seem to follow you with every step as you walk down onto the field, walking past the screaming fans on one side and the football staff on the other. You were used to all of this considering you’d been a part of his football journey since day 1, but this time it felt different. The sea of people around you felt a tad overwhelming but incredibly exhilarating. There’s a sense of being both tiny and monumental at the same time–part of something much larger than yourself, yet with all eyes on you. 

“They should be coming out any minute now,” Robin said once you reached the roped-off family section from where you could see the entire field. “How are you doing?” she asked, noticing your slightly overwhelmed facial expression. 

“Good,” you breathed out. “I can feel all the eyes on me though,” you giggled.

“I think your outfit might have something to do with that,” she smiled as she rubbed your back. “They can see that his girlfriend came to play today,”.

“Yeah,” you blushed. “She did,” you grinned as you played with the ‘9’ on your necklace.

A few minutes later, they started setting everything up for the players run outs, your heartbeat picking up once you realized you were about to see him and this was really going to set in. 

“Fuck, I can’t forget this,” you whispered to yourself as you reached into your pocket for your peach lipgloss. You carefully but quickly smeared the gloss over your plump lips as you heard and watched the team run out. The crowd erupted as the music blared throughout the stadium and you could practically feel the vibrations underneath you right now. 

“And the Quarterback of the Cincinnati Bengals, Joe Burrowww!” the announcers yelled over the speakers, your heart stopping as you heard the stadium erupt once more as the electricity in the air got dialed to 100. 

“Here he comes,” Robin squealed next to you as she placed her hands on your shoulders and gently shook you around because of how excited she was for you. 

And there he was. 

The man that swept you off your feet, the man that completed your world, the man that loved you in ways that you thought were impossible. There he was running out of the tunnel and onto the field–and he was running straight to you. 

You smiled at him as you watched him take his helmet off with one hand, using his other to fix his hair as he got closer to you. The crowd behind you losing their minds because of the detour he took over to this area of the sidelines. 

“Joe!! Marry me!” one fan screamed. 

“Have my babies!” another screamed.

“Yeahhh, get 'em’ shiesty!” another screamed.

“Ahhhh, he’s coming over here,” another one screamed. 

You paid 0 attention to what was happening around you because as soon as you laid your eyes on him, everything went silent. It felt like it was just the two of you in that stadium. 

“Fuck, he looks good,” you whispered under your breath as you gave him a slow once over, the Orange Jersey he had on was your absolute favorite.

Joe reached the roped-off portion of the family section and placed his helmet on the ground, first greeting his parents and sharing a few words with them before moving to you, who was eagerly waiting for him to notice you. 

“Hi,” you grinned at him.

“Fancy seeing you here,” he wiggled his eyebrows. “Come here often?”.

“Nah, first time,” you giggled. 

“Well, how’s the experience so far rookie? Is it everything you dreamed of?” he asked you as he caught his breath. 

“Everything and more,” you smiled at him, and he flashed his million-dollar smile at you in return. “When you smile that beautiful smile, all the girls in the front row scream your name. Just listen to them,” you giggled as you heard the loud girls screaming his name amongst some other bold things. 

“Okay, but I can’t take my eyes off of you, and only you. As far as I’m concerned, you’re the only girl in this stadium right now,”. 

“Please, I’m just another wide-eyed girl who’s desperately in love with you. Your whole fan club is here,”.

“Pshh, please. The fan club can go find someone else to thirst over. I have all I need right here,” he smiled as he grabbed your hand and pulled you closer, the rope preventing him from fully holding you. “Mm, this is a problem,” he sighed. 

“Sorry, I’m off limits,” you winked. 

“Nope,” he shook his head as he placed his hands on either side of your hips.

“Joe, what the hell are you-,”.

“Curl your legs up,” he whispered in your ear as he picked you up and lifted you to the other side of the rope, practically carrying you over it. 

“Holy shit,” you widened your eyes at what he just did in front of everyone. You could hear the loud chatter behind you, everyone sounding incredibly confused as to what was going on in front of them. 

“Not off limits anymore,” he smiled as he set you down and fixed your hair. 

“I could’ve climbed under the ropes…” you said, still frozen in shock.

“Yeah, but that wouldn’t be dramatic enough for us,” he laughed as he met your beautiful eyes. 

“Fair point,” you giggled. 

“I’m really glad you’re here. This is all I’ve ever wanted,” he said as he turned a bit more serious. 

“This is all I’ve wanted too. I’m glad we decided to give this a chance, well, more than a chance. I know it hasn’t even been that long, but I’m all in,” you looked at him with your adorably soft eyes that he loved to get lost in.

“I’ve been all in since the day I saw you,” he blushed. 

“Damn, am I that captivating?” you giggled as you fanned yourself from the flattery. 

“Do you need me to answer that for real or…,”.

“No need. You can show me later,” you winked as you watched him quickly look over his shoulder at the time, seeing that he had to go back to his area for kickoff. 

“I gotta go,” Joe breathed out. 

“Okay,” you nodded as you shoved your hands in your pockets. “Have a good game,” you innocently teased. 

“Mm, Mm,” Joe shook his head. “Nope,”.

“What?” you wiggled your eyebrows. “You need something else?”.

Joe reached out and put his hand in your jacket pocket, pulling you into him as you stumbled because of the sudden movement. Your eyes were glued to your feet as you slowly moved your head up and looked up at him, “I need my good luck kiss,” he grinned. 

“Fine,” you playfully rolled your eyes and sighed. “If you insist-,” you began to say before you felt Joe smash his lips against yours, his hand firmly planted on your ass as he pressed you closer to his body. He groaned into the kiss as he tasted your delicious lip gloss on your lips. He placed his other hand on your waist as your hands looped around his neck, both of you getting lost in the sensual yet sweet kiss and forgetting about where you were and what was happening. 

You were sure that everyone around you was probably screaming, taking a dozen photos and videos, and probably screaming at you to get away from Joe. But you didn’t actually hear any of it. It was just the two of you out there. In a stadium packed with thousands upon thousands of fans, it felt like it was just the two of you there. 

A few seconds later, you both pulled away, still holding onto each other though. You and Joe were both a little breathless as you both laughed at each other.

“Peach Lip Gloss. You didn’t forget,” he winked. 

“I could never forget,” you smiled as you heard a staff member call out for him. “Oops, looks like I’ve kept you too long,”.

“The game can wait,” he rolled his eyes. 

“Uhh, I don’t think that’s how that works,” you laughed as you threaded your hands in his hair.

“Yeah, you’re probably right,” he said as he dropped his head. 

“Hey,” you said as you lifted his head back up and cupped his cheek. “Remember, you’re amazing and you’re going to kill it out there. Win or Lose, you are still one of the best damn quarterbacks to get onto that field in recent memory,”. 

“I love you, Y/N,” he smiled, his heart beating right out of his chest at this point. 

“I love you, Loverboy,” you giggled.

“Go get 'em’, Superstar,” you grinned as you pressed a final kiss to his lips. 

After the Game

They won. The Bengals had won their first playoff game of the postseason. 

Joe killed it, to say the least. He was out there playing with an extra edge, an edge many were curious about.

The only ones that knew where his newfound edge came from were the two of you. You were the edge he was playing with. He knew you were watching and he knew how much this all meant to you, he wanted to make it perfect. 

And he did. 

From start to finish he played an excellent game, one of the best games of his NFL career is what many were calling it. 

Currently, you were seated on a bench outside the locker room as Joe was about to go into his postgame conference. You couldn’t wait to see him. Your phone was blowing up with messages and various notifications about you and Joe but you were holding off on looking at them because you remember he said that he wanted to do it together. 

You pulled up the Bengals App and tapped on the live feed for the conference, your heart, soul, and face lighting up once you saw Joe sit down with a huge smile on his face. 

“Hello, Hello,” he cutely said into the mic as he got comfortable. 

“So, Joe. Looks like you had one hell of a game out there,” one reporter said. 

Joe laughed as he pushed his hair back with his hand, “Yeah, I guess I did,”.

“Any reason in particular? Looked like you were playing with an extra edge out there,” another reporter asked. 

“Just good vibes and feeling 100% all around,” he sighed. 

“So, it had nothing to do with what happened on the sidelines before the game?” another reporter asked.

“Can they ask him that?” you whispered to yourself as you raised an eyebrow. 

Joe let out a soft chuckle before responding, “Honestly. It had everything to do with that,” he boldly said. 

Gasps and murmurs began to fill the conference room before another reporter spoke up. “Joe, we know you don’t really talk about your private life, but we have to know. That looked like one of your friends from college from what we’ve seen about you over the years,” they said. 

“If you’re comfortable with sharing anything about that, we’d love to hear it,” another reporter added. 

Joe paused for a few seconds before taking a deep breath. “Yeah, it is. That’s Y/N. She’s my bestest friend in the entire world ,” he nodded. “But also my girlfriend. She means the world to me and is a big reason why I go out there every Sunday and do what I do. She’s been by my side since day 1 back at Ohio State. She’s stuck by my side through everything in my career and my personal life, she never failed to show up for me no matter the situation or circumstances. She’s done it for 9 years and she doesn’t plan on stopping anytime soon and I do the same for her. I love her more than words can describe. She’s my everything,”. 

You felt a tear trickle down your face as you heard him talk about you most sweetly and lovingly way possible. He truly loved you and wasn’t afraid of openly showing it. 

His everything. 

You were his everything. 

–The End–

[ewanmitchellcrumbs]

Hallowed

Pairing: Michael Gavey (Saltburn) x f!reader Warnings: Toxic relationship dynamics, face sitting, smut. Word count: ~1.3k

Summary: Her Early Medieval Literature essay is due, and Michael has his own cruel way of ensuring she stays focused.

Author's note: Can be read as part two of this fic, but also works as a standalone. Day six of the Smuffmas prompts - "future and face sitting". No tag list. Follow @fics-by-ewanmitchellcrumbs and turn on post notifications.

She lounges on Michael’s bed, clad in only knickers and one of his t-shirts, a copy of the Canterbury Tales grasped lightly between her fingers. Her eyes move over the words of Chaucer, but take none of them in, how could they? His long fingers draw lazy circles on her ankle, her legs stretched out up to the pillows where he reclines, the duvet wrapped around his bare midriff while he reads from a textbook called the Book of Proof.

Life feels simpler since Michael has entered it, despite the turbulent beginnings. She has given up her friends, under his advice, and there is now far less pressure to conform. Her only focuses are her studies and pleasing him, the latter of the two she takes great pleasure in.

It is always on his terms; when they see each other, what they do, how they do it, and despite his obvious initial inexperience he is a fast learner. His ability to make her fall apart, to make her relinquish all control is something he does expertly. The slight fear she feels towards him only adds to the excitement; he could destroy her if he wanted to, but if she plays nicely then he won’t, and she is more than happy to play nicely when the rewards for doing so are as satisfying as they are.

She sighs, his fingers upon her flesh making her core throb with want, even from the simple gesture of absentmindedly touching her leg. She lets her book slip from her fingers, raising up on her elbow to look at him.

“Michael…” she whines.

He looks at her impassively, adjusting his glasses. “The first of your three essays is due soon, isn’t it?”

“Mmm,” she responds with a roll of her eyes, flopping back down and stretching her arms above her head. “Early Medieval Literature.”

His hand moves from her ankle, fingertips ghosting over the exposed skin between the hem of his t-shirt and the waistband of her underwear. “And what have you written?”

She shivers beneath his touch, squirming slightly. “Am I really here to study?”

“I’ve no interest in sleeping with a failing literature student,” he pulls his hand away and she immediately misses his warmth. “So tell me.”

She groans in frustration. “Oh, I don’t know. Probably something about irony in the Merchant’s Tale.”

His textbook thuds closed and she hears the heavy sound of him dropping it onto the bedside table. When she chances to glance up at him she sees he is sitting straighter in the bed, his gaze hardened as he looks at her. “Probably?! You mean you haven’t started it? Have you even thought about your thesis statement, your in-depth analysis or how you’re going to conclude your ideas, if you’ve even had any?”

“Oh, come on,” she says softly, sitting up and reaching for him. “There’s still time. Can’t we just–”

“No,” he cuts her off. “I’ve been spoiling you, and it’s made you stupid.”

“I’m not stupid!” She protests. “If I remember correctly, it was you who called my degree a ‘glorified book club’.”

“You still need to try,” he tells her, frowning.

“You don’t try,” she argues with a shrug,” and marks in your first year don’t count towards the final degree.”

“I don’t have to try, but I still get firsts in everything. Marks this year may not count towards the final degree you get, but they count towards you keeping your scholarship. Think about your future instead of being a fucking brat for once in your life.”

His words are a sharp sting to her already fragile ego, and she lowers her gaze, fighting the sudden urge to cry.

“I’m not touching you again until your essay’s handed in and I’ve seen what your mark is.”

Her head snaps up, eyes wide with disbelief as she looks at him, searching his features for any indication that he’s being unserious. She finds none; he really means it.

“And you’re not to touch yourself. I’ll know.”

The next two weeks are torturous for her. On the occasions that Michael does invite her to his room, there is no more casual half dressed lounging on his bed. Instead, he has a study space set up for her at his desk, and won’t allow her to speak or leave until she has at least a thousand words written. 

They meet up in the library during free periods so that he can read through what she’s written, and her skin burns hot with humiliation each time he screws up a page and throws it into the waste paper bin, calling her arguments “lazy” and “uninspired”.

It lights a fire of determination beneath her, but bubbling under the surface is also a heightened state of arousal, driven by the lack of intimacy, and the fact that she finds that she likes it when he is so authoritative over her.

By the time she has finished, she has produced an essay that both her and Michael are satisfied with; it discusses the use of irony in Chaucer’s poem, the Merchant's Tale. She has used a number of excerpts and lines from the poem for analysis, revealing the instances of irony in each, and from this has determined that the irony Chaucer used in the Merchant's Tale is controlled.

Her eyes light up when Professor Ware hands it back, and she sees the 85% that’s circled at the top of it.

A first.

She feels giddy with excitement as she knocks on Michael’s door that evening, brandishing the now dog-eared pages at him as he opens the door.

“A first, I got a first!” She squeals, watching as he takes the essay from her, his eyes moving slowly over the top page.

“Hmmm,” he settles it down on the desk, removing his glasses and placing them on top. “Take off your jeans and underwear.”

“Wha–what?” She stammers, her grin fading.

“You want your reward, don’t you?” He asks, moving to lay back on the bed.

She swallows thickly, excitement fluttering in her lower belly, as she quickly complies, ridding herself of the clothing that covers her lower half.

“Come here,” he commands softly.

She joins him on the bed, a gasp leaving her as he manhandles her until her knees are positioned either side of his head.

“My clever girl,” he whispers. His words could be mistaken for softness, were they not directly juxtaposed by the rapid darkening of his blue eyes, and the way his thumbs drag across the indentations between her thighs and pelvis. “I knew you could do it, you just needed a little…push.”

He drags his tongue from her opening all the way to her pearl, and her jaw goes slack, the wet sensation making her clench as she falls forward, hands clawing at the wall in front of her.

His grip on her thighs tightens and he tugs her flush against his face, the sloppy sounds of him devouring her are lewd combined with the wanton cries of pleasure that tumble from her lips.

She feels her mind go blank as he inserts his tongue inside of her, keeping it rigid as she begins to grind herself in a circular motion, keeping his nose pressed against where she needs it most, desperately chasing the release she’s needed the last couple of weeks.

His hum of appreciation reverberates through her core, and as he withdraws from her, plush lips wrapping around her sensitive bundle of nerves she feels herself fall apart as the growing ache intensifies, completely at his mercy as he laps at her, while white hot waves of pleasure wash over her.

She raises up when it becomes too much, jerking at how oversensitive she feels and gazes down at him through heavy lidded eyes, breathless.

He looks like an utterly different person without his glasses, almost kind, though she knows better. His chin is shiny with her slick as he smirks up at her.

“You’ve worked so hard,” he says quietly, though the edge of malevolence to his voice is unmistakable. “But don’t worry, you can give that pretty little mind of yours a rest while I fuck you stupid again.”

She is powerless to resist as he tugs her back to his face once more, beginning the exquisite torture all over again.

Part one || Series masterlist

[gureumz]

come to me, make it right

rating: explicit

member: heeseung

notes: fem-bodied reader, backup dancer!reader, slight dom!heeseung, canon-compliant (?), dirty talk, semi-public sex, choking, unprotected sex, creampie, fingering, cum-eating, reader breaches professionalism lol

a/n: let's give heeseung a break and let him have his (your) cake 😔 so here i present the backup dancer fic! don't lie to me i know y'all wish it was you bc i do

"he's really something, isn't he?"

the question catches you off guard, your head turning abruptly as you give your friend a look. sion, dressed nearly identically to your all-black get-up, scoots closer to where you're seated on the floor, shoving her shoulder right up to yours.

"what are you on about?" you question before taking a big gulp from your water bottle.

"heeseung," she whispers, gesturing with her eyes to the tall figure standing across the practice room. he's typing on his phone, back turned to you.

"what about him?" you ask.

"he's good. like really good. one of the better idols i've worked with," sion explains, hooking an arm around yours.

"oh, please, you wish you could work with him personally," a different voice whispers from your right. serin, another one of your co-backup dancers, slides up to where you're sitting.

"too bad _______ got the gig first," serin adds, nudging you. you roll your eyes as the two of them collapse in giggles.

it's been two weeks since you were onboarded onto this project for enhypen's comeback. today was the dance practice filming and you can say that so far, it's been smooth sailing for the most part. the company was generous enough and the performance directors were easy to work with. the members themselves gave you no problems whatsoever, though you could only truly speak for one of them.

heeseung was nice enough, extremely polite, but also tremendously serious when it comes to performing. you've only known him for all of the two weeks, but you know better than to get in his way. you stepped on his foot once and you remember wanting to disintegrate right then, but to your surprise, heeseung merely smiled, reassuring you that it was fine.

it was rather easy to fall into rhythm with him. you don't know if it was your doing, or his, or both, but it's like the two of you spoke the same dance language. there were barely any words uttered, but understanding passed between you effortlessly.

he was kind of sweet too, always asking if you've eaten, if you need any more water, if his hand placement was too much. you appreciated it, a far cry from some other people you've worked with that barely spared you a glance. you'd be fine with the bare minimum of friendliness, if it was all out of courtesy that heeseung asked you all these questions. but the way he stares down at you attentively has your stomach churning. whether that's a good or bad thing, you've yet to decide.

your eyes draw towards heeseung as he pockets his phone, his gaze somehow finding yours in a split second. before you could look away, he smiles, waving rather cutely at you.

you wave back politely, quickly signing a 'have you eaten?' to him. heeseung shakes his head and points back at you as if to ask, 'how about you?'.

you reply no and heeseung pouts.

'eat soon, okay?' he mouths to you. you hold up the 'okay' sign and heeseung nods, satisfied.

sion and serin fall silent as the three of you watch heeseung gather with the rest of enhypen, all seven excusing themselves to go eat. heeseung locks eyes with you briefly one more time and smiles, eyebrows raised.

and then they were gone.

"what was that?" sion asks, grinning like a feline.

"he's being nice," you contest. "doesn't jungwon tell you to eat when you should?"

sion balks at that, clearing her throat. "he does. he's very considerate."

"but that," sion continues. "that look is different, ________, i'm telling you."

serin nods enthusiastically in agreement. "right? do the two of you talk outside of practice?"

"you guys are so unprofessional," you complain, though a smile creeps onto your face.

"and, no, we don't."

---

"did you see my kakao request?"

you peer up at heeseung, eyebrows knitting together. it takes you another few seconds to register what exactly he was asking.

"you added me on kakao?" you finally ask back.

his hands are in his pockets, a fluffy blanket wrapped tightly around his frame. the weather in poland is more than a little chilly this time of year, a struggle for you all as you drag yourselves through the music video filming.

heeseung chuckles, his eyes squinting down at you. "yeah, last night."

"sorry, i must have missed it," you reply sheepishly, pulling your own blanket tighter around your shoulders. "i have about a dozen requests at any given time."

"ooh, someone's in demand," heeseung teases, nudging you lightly. you laugh nervously, scanning the set around you.

the members and their respective dancers have gotten friendly over the course of the comeback preparations. nothing too chummy, but all of you are comfortable enough to strike up conversations with each other on and off schedule. it was nice, getting to know the guys of enhypen a little better.

but the way heeseung caught up to you in this dark, secluded part of the set where you were merely looking for cell service makes it look a little too suspicious.

'what do you want?' is what threatened to come out of your mouth. you often think you would rather be dead than be caught in a dating scandal with an idol. not that you're assuming anything, but you've seen this behavior before, and heeseung really is just a man at the end of the day, so who's to say that—

"um, is everything okay?" heeseung asks, waving a hand in front of your face. you blink, your surroundings coming back into view. you look up and are met with heeseung's grey-colored lenses. you stop a shiver from running down your spine at how hard he's staring down at you.

"yeah, sorry," you respond hurriedly, clearing your throat. "what i meant to say is, i have messages from people asking for dancers for a program or shoot or what-have-you, all those stuff."

heeseung nods before looking away, eyes scanning the staff as they arrange the set. before neither of you could say anything more, jake's head pops out from behind a stack of equipment boxes.

"hyung? oh, there you are," jake says with a start, noticing you at the last second.

"hi, _______!" he adds cheerily.

you smile warmly at him, slightly relieved that someone is there to interrupt.

jake turns back to heeseung. "jungwon says to drop by the hair and makeup tent for a bit."

heeseung nods at the younger, brushing past you to get to jake.

"see you in a bit," heeseung says, fingers lightly curling around your forearm. you tense up but nod in reply.

"see you," you return weakly.

you wait until the two of them are gone before sighing, stalking off to the other end of the set to where the dancers' tent is set up.

---

studio choom is one of your favorite parts of being a backup dancer. the staff was nice, the set was wide and airy, and the lighting was amazing. your excitement concerning the last part was evident in the way you couldn't take your eyes off your phone as you held it in front of your face.

"i look so good," you comment with a laugh, surveying yourself on the camera display. "even with the mask and all."

"right?" serin agrees from behind you, getting into frame with you. you quickly snap a couple photos.

the director barks out an order to get into blocking and you quickly hide your phone away, silently thanking in your head one of the other dancers for bringing in the large tote to hold all of your devices.

you walk under the bright multicolored lights onto the actual filming set, hovering over the general area of where you're supposed to be blocked. you wait for the members and other dancers to find their places, eyes downcast as you try to find your exact spot.

a hand brushes your arm and you look up to see heeseung smiling down at you.

"you look good," he mutters quietly before walking to center, getting on his hands and knees as he settles into his starting position.

serin passes in front of you, eyes expressive enough that you instantly get what she's saying despite half of her face being obscured by the mask.

'what was that?!' her eyes seemed to cry out.

you shake your head. 'i have no idea,' you respond as best as you can with your own confused gaze.

the director calls out another command and everything else is dropped as all of you fall into performance mode. autopilot takes over you, every take passing by quickly, much to your surprise.

an hour and a half later and on the last take of the chorus, you find yourself restless, stomach already grumbling. you pick at your long black gloves, wishing for this day to be over.

enhypen are in formation in front of the camera, with the dancers at the wings, ready to approach for the chorus. somehow, despite blending into the shadows of the set, heeseung finds you, tilting his head to the side in a sort of greeting.

you mirror his action and heeseung instantly smiles. you can't help the grin that breaks out behind your mask.

"last take, everyone!" the director calls out.

with a little more difficulty than you'd like to admit, you rip your gaze away from heeseung's, a tingling feeling settling in your stomach.

---

almost all thoughts of heeseung disappear from your mind as you get home later that day, too exhausted to pore over every interaction you have with your dance partner. you lay sprawled out on your bed, having just finished freshening up, eyes heavy as you feel drowsiness creep into your consciousness.

the keyword is almost.

you hear a notification ping from your phone and your sleepiness is immediately replaced with pure adrenaline. your read the notification over and over again just to make sure you weren't imagining it.

이희승 (lee heeseung): hi

you sit up, your heart pounding. leaning against your headboard, you watch as another message comes in.

이희승: you up?

you snicker, opening your kakaotalk app. heeseung's name is at the top of the chat room, easily indicating just who you're talking to. you quickly type a reply.

너 (you): ooh he finally messaged ㅋㅋ what an opening tho

you chew on your lower lip as you send the message, the 'read' sign immediately appearing. you watch as heeseung types out his reply.

이희승: lol sorry did that come off too creepy?

너: not at all. why the sudden message tho? was my performance that bad that it has you staying up at night?

이희승: oh no nothing of that sort. just wanted to say thank you for your hard work today

you blink, cheeks growing warm. he messaged you at ass-o'-clock to thank you?

너: thanks! you did super well today too

이희승: don't i always? (pouting face)

it's at this moment that you realize, without a shadow of a doubt, that lee heeseung, a member of a globally renowned k-pop idol group, is flirting with you.

you lock your phone, laying back down on your pillow, contemplating on what to do.

you could always flirt back, then act as if nothing happened the next time you see him. see how far the two of you can take it. you might end up sneaking around green rooms and closets, but, hey, half of the fun is the thrill of getting caught. or you could shut it down now, rejecting him gently because what kind of unprofessional loser would fold at the slightest display of romantic interest from an idol?

you sigh.

you would.

you're a (slightly) unprofessional loser that would fold at the slightest display of romantic interest from an idol.

you open up your phone, fingers moving at lightning speed.

너: my bad. you always do well (wink)

a whole minute passes by, heeseung typing then stopping then starting up again, before he stops once more for a few seconds. you feel anxiety seeping out of every pore on your body.

이희승: good girl ㅋㅋ that's what i like to hear

you gape at your phone, a strange tingle spreading all over you.

you take a moment to scream into your pillow.

---

you're waiting for it to boil over. to culminate into something. for shit to hit the fan, as you would inelegantly put it.

you left heeseung on read last night, at a total loss for words at his reply. he doesn't press further, either. in your mind, he's probably thinking one of two things: 1) that he deeply offended you, or 2) that he's achieved the desired effect.

you don't have to think too hard about which one of those is true.

you enter the assigned green room to you and the other dancers, poking your head in first, eyes landing on your coworkers lounging about.

"oh, _______!" sion calls out excitedly. the rest of them turn their heads to you, erupting into similar squeals.

"close the door!" serin orders. too stunned to protest, you do as you're told, leaning against the wall as all of your friends talk over each other.

"heeseung was looking for you," sion's voice rises above the rest and your eyes unconsciously widen, your heart rate picking up.

"yeah, he came here himself and asked where you were," serin adds, nodding.

"what's going on with you two?" another dancer, yeeun, asks in a singsong voice.

"n-nothing's going on," you say with a laugh, waving them off nonchalantly.

"like we'll believe that," sion retorts. "we'll keep it a secret, promise!"

the rest of them agree, sounding like a chorus of schoolchildren hearing about their teacher's boyfriend. you sigh, setting your things down on the floor.

"we're messaging on kakao, that's all," you admit, shrugging.

"sexting already?" serin chides with a laugh. you give her a look as the room erupts in laughter.

"you guys are hopeless," you say with a shake of your head, but you can't help but laugh along.

"we're not sexting. not...yet," you add. there's a pause before the laughter grows louder, all of them throwing jokes around about being safe and dating scandals.

"luck you," yeeun says with a sigh. "it's taking jake forever to make a move."

the whole room shifts its attention to her and you breathe a quiet sigh of relief. your phone vibrates and you feel your whole body grow hot as you read your screen.

이희승: come out for a second

before anyone can stop you, you quickly slip out of the green room, looking down in both directions of the hallway. to your right, you see heeseung standing outside enhypen's own waiting room, eyes staring at you intently.

with a nervous glance back behind you, you make your way to him. the hallway seems empty at this time, with most artists and staff in their respective rooms, the early prerecording hour hanging heavily over everyone.

"hi," heeseung says with a grin the moment you're near enough to hear him.

"hi," you respond, fidgeting with your hands. you scrape over your knuckles with your nails, waiting for heeseung to continue.

"about last night, i'm sorry if i went too far," heeseung begins, voice dropping, eyes looking around nervously.

oh.

so he's thinking option number 1.

"oh no, not at all," you reassure him. "i appreciate the gesture. i know you were only trying to be friendly."

heeseung raises his eyebrows as you say this. he purses his lips before speaking.

"friendly isn't the right word, exactly...," heeseung says, trailing off. he bites down on his lip, eyes momentarily flitting up and down over your figure.

it's your turn to be surprised.

"i see," you reply.

there's a long stretch of silence after this, both of you avoiding each other's eyes. an awkward laugh escapes you and heeseung follows, scratching at the back of his head.

you finally look up to meet his eyes, his pupils blown wide as he seems to consider his next words.

"i mean, i'm down if you are," heeseung says, stepping closer. "i won't hold it against you if you aren't, though."

you don't need to be told what his words meant. with the way he's staring at you right now, eyes unmoving but filled with something you can only describe as desire, you know full well what heeseung is implying.

"i am," you say after a moment. you're still fidgeting, hands clasped together in front of you. heeseung notices, his own hand coming up to lay on yours, stilling your movements. his fingers curl around your wrist.

"are we waiting after the recording or...?" you ask, letting heeseung pry your hands apart. he grips you firmly and you feel yourself practically igniting from his touch.

"i could use a pick-me-up right now" heeseung throws out casually, as if merely suggesting that the two of you get coffee. he jerks his head towards the door right next to their waiting room.

"this one's empty," heeseung informs. "i checked."

you can't help but grin up at him. he licks his lips as if he's looking down at his next meal, which you know, isn't that far from the truth.

"and no surveillance cameras, either," heeseung says, leaning down to whisper next to your ear.

without replying, you walk backward in the direction of the empty waiting room. heeseung follows, still gripping your arm, letting you pull him along. you never break eye contact, even as you reach behind you to turn the knob, pushing the door open.

only now do you avert your eyes away from him, stepping into the dimly lit room, a single weak lightbulb turned on in the farthest corner. with heeseung right behind you, you hear the door close, and without missing a beat, heeseung tugs you back, hands grabbing you by the waist.

he shoves you against the door, his face impossibly close to yours, your breaths mingling as you practically pant in anticipation. heeseung reaches down, locking the door, the click of the mechanism deafening in the silence.

"you can still say no," heeseung whispers.

"why would i do that?" you say before leaning forward to kiss him.

heeseung sighs against your mouth, his hand holding one side of your face to keep you steady. you're both still in your casual clothes, and you thank the heavens for this because your hands slip easily underneath his oversized hoodie. your palms smooth over his toned stomach and up his chest where you lightly rake your nails back downward.

you gasp when you feel heeseung roughly grab one of your boobs through your shirt at the same time he pushes a knee between your legs. you belatedly realize that it's today of all days that you've decided to wear a miniskirt.

"making my job easier," heeseung teases, as if able to read your thoughts. he smirks at you, planting a brief kiss on your lips as he angles you better on his thigh.

"your job...," you say in between labored breaths. you feel yourself growing wetter as you grind down on the taut muscle. "...is to fuck me before anyone notices we're gone."

heeseung grunts, pulling his leg away, ignoring the way you whine at the loss of friction. he pulls your skirt up roughly, letting it bunch around your waist. you gasp as you hear the sound of ripping fabric.

"heeseung!" you say in disbelief as he pockets your now torn-up lace panties. he merely chuckles, leaning in to kiss down from below your ear to your conveniently exposed chest, a feat made possible by your skimpy tank top.

"turn around, baby," heeseung whispers, planting another kiss, but this time, on your nose.

you stare at him for a moment, eyes bleary. are you really about to do this?

"please?" heeseung adds, eyes wide and round as he utters this one word so sweetly.

with weak knees, you do as you're told, letting heeseung press his chest flush against your back. you mewl when you feel his rough fingers slip between your slick folds, rubbing up then down, circling around the relative area of your clit. he finds it a second later, pressing down and working it expertly.

"fuck," you say, voice trembling. you let out a startled noise as you feel heeseung press a large hand over your mouth.

"no one can see us here but that doesn't mean they can't hear us," heeseung says against the shell of your ear.

"so i need you to be quiet for me, baby, okay?"

melting at these words, you could do nothing more but nod. heeseung kisses the back of your head tenderly. you hear him tugging his sweatpants down, letting it pool around his ankles.

you whimper when you feel a hard poke on one of your asscheeks, anticipation bubbling in you. you wriggle around, spreading your legs slightly apart and sticking your hips out.

"good girl," heeseung praises you, pressing his tip right against your hole. "doesn't need me to tell her what to do."

heeseung keeps his hand pressed firmly on your mouth, ensuring to muffle any sound that escapes you. and it's a good thing, too, because you're tempted to sob when you feel him push in, filling you in one swift motion.

"god," heeseung grunts as he bottoms out. "spent so long imagining what it would feel like to fuck you like this."

heeseung lets go of your face in favor of bracing himself against the door. you gasp out, the feeling of him quickly overwhelming you. and to think he hasn't even moved, yet.

"tried so hard not to let my hands wander but, fuck, you make it so difficult," heeseung says directly into your ear. he gives his first thrust and you decide to take on the responsibility of covering your own mouth because the stretch from his cock threatens a scream out of you.

"those goddamn stylists putting you girls in those tight dresses," heeseung continues. "and they expect us to keep our eyes and hands still?"

your eyes roll back at the filthy admission. heeseung grips you harshly by the waist and the whole world falls away from view when you feel him hammer in and out of you.

it's unknown to you how you could keep yourself upright, your knees feeling as if they could give out any moment. heeseung fucks into you roughly, your words about finishing quickly before your absence raises any questions seemingly spurring him on.

"so good, so fucking good," heeseung blabbers on, surely lost in his own pleasure. you lean back against his large frame for support and heeseung is quick to wrap a hand around your throat.

"yes!" you gasp out, blood rushing loudly in your ears as you feel heeseung squeeze down around your neck.

you wonder what you must look like right now. if anyone on the off chance would walk in on you and see your clothes and hair disheveled, your already short skirt pushed up even further, back arched in pleasure as heeseung fucks into your throbbing, drenched pussy. as if reading your mind again, heeseung prods against your mouth with two fingers, slipping them inside, leaving you no choice but to suckle on the salty skin.

at this moment, the two of you are possibly the very image of sin.

"squeezing me so tight, babe," heeseung breathes out against your neck. you gasp when you feel his teeth sink into the skin of your shoulder, soft moans escaping his own lips.

heeseung pulls his fingers out of your mouth and drool drips down your chin. he grabs at your neck once again, tighter this time, his other arm wrapping around your midsection as he picks up the pace.

"fuck, i'm getting close," heeseung practically growls, maneuvering the two of you away from the door.

"help me out, baby," heeseung pleads in your ears. "tell me how good you're feeling."

you finally let out the sob that's been fighting its way out of you.

"h-heeseung you feel so g-good," you comply, voice breaking from heeseung's vice grip around your neck.

"want you to ruin me like this every day. need you to f-fuck me in front of the practice room mirror," you continue, trying to find the right words despite the growing haziness in your head.

heeseung lets out a noise. "yeah? wanna watch yourself get split open like this? every day, huh?"

you nod frantically. "yes, yes, yes! d-didn't know i needed you this bad."

heeseung grows quiet as he holds you against him, hips snapping up erratically. you're sure that you've made a mess on the floor by now, seeing as you're absolutely drenched. the thought pushes you closer to your own release.

"c-cum for me please," you implore, feeling yourself shake at the thought of your impending orgasm.

"yeah, angel, gonna cum for you. g-gonna cum in this tight, gorgeous pussy. so good for me, letting me fuck them in s-some dark room right next door to m-my manager and members and all the staff, fuck—!"

heeseung abruptly stills, hand falling away from your neck. you take in a gulp of air, your fingers frantically reaching down to rub at your clit. you feel heeseung twitch and spill himself inside of you and you squeeze your eyes shut, coaxing yourself closer to euphoria.

finally, the floodgates open and your whole body seizes up from your orgasm. heeseung's face is buried in your neck and you can vaguely register him encouraging you through it.

you relax after a few seconds, leaning hard against heeseung as you feel your body nearly give out. heeseung pulls out but quickly replaces his cock with two of his fingers. you whine weakly, head lolling back against heeseung's shoulder.

"i got you," heeseung coos, working his fingers in and out of you at a languid pace. you twitch in oversensitivity, complaining how it's too much.

heeseung retracts his fingers and you catch him licking them clean just as you turn to face him. your eyes have adjusted in the dim lighting, heeseung's features coming into focus.

"you just tasted yourself," you say in half surprise and half bewilderment.

heeseung breathes out a laugh, letting his fingers out of his mouth with a soft pop.

"had to keep it in somehow," heeseung says nonchalantly. "seeing as i, ah, compromised your underwear."

you roll your eyes, giggling. "i think you more than compromised my underwear. you tore it in half, heeseung."

heeseung shrugs, donning an unapologetic expression. you swat at his chest playfully but you stop mid-laugh when you feel something drip out of you.

"oh god, fuck—," you start to complain, but before you could get another word out, heeseung drops to his knees, doe eyes peering up at you.

heeseung prods your legs apart, sticking his tongue out just in time to catch his own cum dribbling out of you.

"i'll clean you up, baby," heeseung says, mouth already pressing against your leaking hole.

all you can do is grab onto his shoulder, eyes rolling back as you feel your clit twitch with newfound arousal.

[achilles-rage]

achilles-rage’s twelve days of christmas

day eleven: wrapped in red (ft. eddie diaz)

summary: with the chaotic weeks leading up to christmas meaning that you and eddie have barely had a moment alone, you decide to surprise him with an early christmas gift.

word count: 2.7k

series masterlist

a/n: sorry this is late, i’ve been having trouble writing smut lately. i hope this is okay!! and also i can’t believe this is the second last day of twelve days!! i don’t want it to end!! at least i still have one more day, and possibly a part two to my rocker secret santa fic (depending on how i feel). anyway, enjoy<33

warnings: smut, hint at predator/prey kink(??), no use of y/n, fem!reader, plus size!reader, race inclusive!reader

With the holidays coming up, life with Eddie has been extremely chaotic. If you’re not anxiously looking for gifts that Christopher has asked for – that every other kid in LA wants too, apparently – then you’re shopping for gifts for your friends and family, or planning Christmas parties, or attending Christmas parties. Honestly, you’re barely even sure that you or Eddie has had a moment to yourself since December 1st.

This also means that you’ve barely gotten a moment with Eddie for weeks, and you’re starting to get a little bit restless. Other than the occasional touches when you’re both just waking up; barely conscious enough to open your eyes and hands wandering aimlessly and with no real intentions, you can’t remember the last time Eddie has properly fucked you.

So, you came up with an idea: wrap yourself up and surprise him with some festive lingerie. It’s, admittedly, a little silly, but you’re sure that Eddie will appreciate it. At the very least, he’ll get a good laugh out of it.

You already have the perfect wrapping paper; a bright red, sparkly design with small white snowflakes, so all you have to do is cut it and tape it together. You decide to only make a little skirt out of it, instead picking out a beautiful green lingerie set with a small red bow on the bra, and one on the panties. You even add a gift tag reading “To: Eddie, From: Santa”

Before Eddie gets home, you get ready; putting on your set and your skirt, and then you decide at the last minute to put two big red Christmas bows on your bra, right where the straps meet the cups on the front.

You’re extremely proud of your skirt; you’d found a tutorial online for a pleated wrapping paper skirt, and it turned out perfectly. Now, all you have to do is wait for Eddie to get home.

Christopher is at Buck’s for the night, probably baking cookies and building gingerbread houses if you know them at all, so you have your boyfriend all to yourself.

When you hear the front door open and shut, you smile to yourself, then step out of the hallway and into Eddie’s sight. He’s in the middle of greeting you when his eyes land on you, and the words die on his lips as he takes you in.

“Why are you wearing wrapping paper?” he asks after a moment, brow raised as he focuses on the skirt. He tries extremely hard to not focus on your tits, otherwise, he might rip your skirt to shreds in a desperate attempt to see you naked underneath him, and he’s not sure what the skirt is for.

“Because I’m your present tonight. Do you- do you not like it?” you ask sheepishly, feeling your cheeks heat up as you look down at your outfit. You thought it was silly, sure, but you didn’t think he’d hate it. Instead of being met with a smile, he just looks confused, and it’s making your stomach churn and your hands fidget at your sides.

“No, no. I fucking love it, just wasn’t sure what it was for.” he reassures you, quickly closing the distance between you two and grabbing one of your hands. He gives you a smile, and you smile back, nodding slowly.

He raises your hand over your head and urges you to do a spin, and as you turn, he tries to look at every inch of exposed skin. He takes in your soft belly, and your chest sitting perfectly in your lace bra, and your bare legs, and his mouth waters.

When you’re turned to face him again, he pulls you toward him, moving the hand he’s holding to drape over his shoulder and then placing both of his hands on your waist. It’s now that you can see the lust in his eyes, and your smile widens as you feel your whole body get hot. Having his undivided attention after so long feels so fucking good.

“I missed having you like this, mi amor. I’m gonna make sure you don’t leave the bedroom until tomorrow morning. If you can even walk tomorrow morning.” he purrs, and you giggle softly, rolling your eyes.

“You like it that much?” you ask, eyes darting across his face so close to you as his eyes travel down your body again. He lets out a growl at the sight of your tits sitting so perfectly for him, and his next words come out low and raspy, which has your squeezing your legs together.

“I fucking love it. I feel like a little kid right now; all I want to do is rip the wrapping off my present.” You bring your hand up to run through the hair on the back of his head, which makes him finally look back up into your eyes.

“So do it.” you tell him, raising a challenging brow. He smirks, and lets his hands run over the paper and down to your hips.

He lets out a quiet chuckle when he reads the gift tag you’ve attached to the waist of your skirt, and then in one quick motion, he rips the paper off of you.

You’re left in just your matching bra and panties, and he groans when he sees the tiny red bow sitting on the waistband of your panties. Like a present. All for him.

His hands are gripping your hips hard as he looks down at your body, a grip threatening to leave bruises as he drinks in all your dips and curves. He can’t believe you did this all for him. If you were to ask him what he wanted for Christmas, he’d say that this is it. Just you.

“Bedroom. Now.” he growls, and without another word, you turn on your heel, practically vibrating in excitement. He smacks your ass as soon as you turn, and you squeal at the impact, looking over your shoulder at him as you keep walking.

He has a predatory look in his eyes as he watches you, and when he begins to stalk after you, eyes narrowed and chest puffed out, you let out something between a giggle and a squeal. You begin to run to the bedroom, your heart racing in your chest as you begin to feel like you’re being hunted.

He runs after you, footsteps heavy as they hit the hardwood, and when you both get to his room, he grabs your hips and pulls you back against his chest.

“Uh uh, why are you trying to get away? You’re my gft, remember? I get to play with you however I want.” he rasps in your ear, causing shivers to shoot down your spine. You can feel his hard length pressing against your back, and you let out a soft whimper, slowly moving your ass back against him.

He lets out a hiss as his grip gets tighter against your hips, then turns you around and pushes you onto the bed in one quick movement.

You bounce gently as you hit the mattress, and when you look up at him again, you back up on the bed, watching him step closer and drink in your plush figure. He pulls his shirt off quickly, and then his pants and boxers, and when he’s completely naked, he crawls onto the bed and towards you.

He meets your lips hungrily, his hips grinding against you and letting you feel the hardness of his cock. Your hands go to his sides as you kiss him with equal fervour, letting your tongues meet each other as you feel your brain go fuzzy. He’s barely started and you already feel so overwhelmed with his touch, and his attention.

He moves his kisses down to your neck, nipping and sucking as he goes, and when he reaches the top of your bra, he leans back and looks down at your dazed expression.

“Don’t know if I want to keep this on or rip it off of you.” he tells you in a low tone, letting his eyes move back down to your lace covered chest as he licks his lips.

“Well, what are you supposed to do with the wrapping on a gift?” you tease softly, quirking a brow with a small smirk.

He chuckles, then shrugs his shoulders as he looks back up into your eyes.

“Good point. Just wanna see you in it for a little while longer.” he mumbles. He presses one more hot kiss to your lips, then leans back on his knees and moves his hands up your legs until he gets to the edge of your panties.

He pulls them to the side quickly, then grabs the base of his cock and brings the tip down to slide between your folds. You both let out soft moans, and you spread your legs wider, letting him move freely as he slides the head of his cock along your clit.

You’re both desperate to feel all of each other, to get the sweet release you’ve been waiting weeks for, but Eddie is more patient than you, it seems. He wants to see you cum before he actually fucks you.

You sit up on your elbows as you watch him in a daze, biting your lip as he taps his cock against your dripping pussy.

It’s hard to resist the urge to bury himself to the hilt, but he holds back for now, enjoying your soft mewls and whimpers as he drags his cock through your folds in achingly slow movements.

“Eds, please.” you whine softly after a while, your eyes pleading as you look up at him. He chuckles softly, then pushes himself into you, just barely. He lets himself rock against you gently, hand firmly gripping the base of his cock as he lets his tip enter your desperate cunt.

He switches between this, and tapping the head of his cock against your clit, and pretty soon, you’re both close to the edge.

Your moans have gotten breathier, and your hands are gripping the sheets beside you as you feel that ball forming in your lower belly. And Eddie is slowly losing the ability to hold back; his cock moving deeper and deeper each time his tip slips between your glistening folds.

“You gonna cum for me, baby? You’re so pretty when you cum.” he rasps, and you nod quickly, letting out a soft whimper.

He chuckles lowly and pulls his cock away completely, instead using his hand to fist his cock as his other hand comes down to circle two fingers around your clit. You throw your head back as you near the edge, but when you hear him tut softly, you bring your head back up so he can meet your eyes.

“Look at me, baby. Watch me when you cum.” he tells you sternly, and in a few more seconds, you’re both falling over the edge with loud moans. He covers your cunt in his release, groaning at the sight of his seed painting your slick folds and dripping down onto the sheets below you.

He barely gives you enough time to come down from your high before he’s flipping you over on the bed. His hands move to your ass, massaging at the flesh before he brings a hand back and spanks you hard. You whimper, letting your body lurch forward in response to the surprise, and then he spanks you again, just to hear the harsh sound of skin meeting skin.

“Gorgeous, mi amor. And all mine.” he murmurs, then rips your panties off you and tosses them to the side.

You gasp at the sound of fabric ripping, and try to look over your shoulder at him with narrowed eyes.

“Eddie, I just bought those!” you argue, although you’re not really mad. They were expensive, but you can’t deny that the action has desire pooling in your belly.

“I’ll replace them.” is all he says before he reaches down to your hips and brings you up onto your knees, face now pushed into the mattress as he spreads your ass cheeks and takes in the sight of your pulsing cunt.

You shiver when you feel the head of his cock teasing your folds again, but it doesn’t last long; he’s desperate to feel you wrapped around him completely. When he pushes into you, he buries himself to the hilt, letting his hips meet yours as he grips at your flesh hard.

You moan into the sheets, body moving forward at the force behind his actions, and when he pulls out almost completely just to bully into you again, you moan louder.

His hips pick up their pace, and as they snaps against yours, flesh slapping against flesh, his hands roam your body, squeezing and massaging at your ass and your thighs.

“Taking me so well, mi amor. Fuck-” he groans, tip kissing your cervix as he relishes in the way you squeeze his cock so perfectly.

He watches the way your ass and thighs jiggle with each thrust, and he has to tilt his head back and close his eyes for a moment, focusing on not cumming too soon.

You moan loudly under him, eyes clouded with pure bliss as he fucks into you roughly, hands eager to touch every inch of skin. When you reach your hand back in a desperate attempt to feel him, he grabs your hand and brings it behind your back, then moves your other one to the same spot and holds your wrists there with one large hand.

“You like that, baby, huh?” he asks, and all you can do is nod, whimpering as his hips meet yours harshly.

When you begin to push your ass back towards him, he growls, then releases your wrists and brings both hands around to your front and squeezes your soft tummy between his fingers. His thrusts momentarily stop as his front presses against your back, but when he pulls you up with him, back still pressed against him, his hips continue their unrelenting pace.

One hand goes back to your hip, helping you move back to meet his thrusts while the other cups one of your tits and squeezes it. He rolls your nipple between his fingers as he feels it bounce with each thrust of his cock, and he can feel himself beginning to twitch inside of you as he gets close to the edge.

“You wanna cum with me, baby? Cum on my cock?” he murmurs in your ear.

“Yes, please. Please, Eds.” you whine, and he smirks, moving his hips harder, if at all possible.

“Cum with me, baby. Let me feel you.” he tells you sternly, and in no time you’re clenching around him as you cum.

When he feels the way your pussy squeezes his cock as you let go with a loud whimper, he lets go, filling you to the brim as he keeps himself buried deep inside you.

You feel him paint your walls with his cum, and you lean your head back against his shoulder in pure bliss, letting your eyes flutter shut as you ride out your high.

He slowly pulls out with a groan, and lets his hands travel up and down your sides as you lean back against him.

“God, I’ve missed this.” he tells you quietly, feeling himself come down from his high, your skin under his fingertips helping to ground him and forget all about the stress of the holidays.

“I love you.” you whisper, trying to catch your breath as you feel your pulsing cunt clenching around nothing. You can feel the mess between your thighs, but you hardly care.

If you know Eddie at all, he’s not done with you yet, anyway.

“I love you, mi amor.” he whispers back, then kisses the side of your neck before helping you lay back down on the bed.

“That was the best gift I’ve ever gotten.” he teases softly as he crawls over you.

You giggle as he begins to press kisses across your face, not leaving an inch of skin unkissed.

“I’m glad.”

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