#also there's a link under the post to part two of that portfolio if you want to get some more now

[paticmak]

Woah.

Thank you beff jezos

part one

part two here

[the-witty-pen-name]

The Nanny Pt. 3

Lee Bodecker x Nanny!F!Reader

18+

Word Count: 3.3k

Warnings: alcohol/drinking, food, corrupt cop, mentions of prostitution/smut, implied age gap (reader is in her 20s), cursing, mentions of serial killers/murder, mutual pining, 

Summary:

Based on this Request: The reader moves to Meade/Knockemstiff while answering an advertisement for a nanny in the paper. We learn that the ad was posted by Sandy, who has the reader watch her child whenever she and Carl leave to do their secret thing. After one of these trips, Sandy and her husband never return, so the reader is left caring for their baby. With the new investigation into these events, she meets Sandy’s brother Lee, the older, out of shape, alcoholic bachelor, and they are suddenly thrown into each others lives as he begins looking into his sister’s disappearance. Through it all, Lee starts to fall for her, and they slowly become a family.

A/N: I got inspired re-watching one of my favorite shows and I want to know if anyone else gets the reference I’m using! If I missed anything I should include as a warning that I missed please let me know! This is also unedited!

Taglist Form is in my bio!

Series Masterlist

Your shoulders tensed listening to the radio in the morning. Sitting on your ottoman, you were painting your nails, using the coffee table as your nail station. It was a really bright morning, and you had the curtains pulled open to draw in light. Julie frantically rushed between her room and the bathroom getting ready for her shift at the diner. The newest single from The Beach Boys was playing through the little counter top radio, but at the top of the hour, the melodies playing through the speaker changed to the news. The top story of the morning was chilling.

“Jules,” you said, calling her over hesitantly, putting the cap back on the bottle of polish. “Come listen to this.”

She scurried out of her room while working to tie her apron in the back, and then she stood next to where you sat to listen to the story on the news. The color drained from her face as you both listened to the reporter describe the horrific scene that was under investigation early this morning.

Roy Laferty was an evangelical preacher whose body washed up by the lake very early that same morning. The news report talked about the police investigation, and also disclosed his wife Helen, is also reported missing. They are looking into the disappearance of Helen, as well as opening a full investigation on Laferty’s murder. They also urge individuals with any information regarding the two to call the Sheriff’s department and to provide a statement.

“That’s horrifying,” you mumble, shocked as you try to process the news. Julie nods in agreement but strangely doesn’t seem nearly as affected by the news as you.

“It’s happening again,” she mutters, obviously concerned but her lack of surprise worries you.

“What do you mean again?” you ask.

“There was a string of unexplained murders, all men, like this newest one,” Julie explained, “This was all over the news like two years ago- can’t believe you hadn’t heard about it.” All you could do was shrug; this was all new to you. “Obviously, there was nothing linking their deaths, but there were these five killings a couple of years ago that are still unsolved. There’s no evidence, but the town rumors it was like a serial killer or something. Nothing is confirmed, of course, just a story.”

“What makes people think it was all the same person?” you ask, hesitantly.

“All the people were always the same type,” she shrugs, “Men all in their 20s and 30s. Again, there’s nothing linking them all together. It’s just talk.”

You clicked off the radio, and didn’t know what to do with yourself. Julie patted your shoulder, comfortingly but she had to go on with her day. So did you, and you almost her ability to move about the apartment almost unfazed by the news. You suppose it makes sense, her growing up here she’s probably used to it. You didn’t have the experience or the thick skin she had.

You had decided to go to the library, still preoccupied by the news segment as well as the things Julie had told you about the Sheriff. You spent the better half of the morning looking at the library’s archives of old newspapers. You wanted to read more about the unsolved cases Julie had told you about, so there you sat for several hours looking through the microfilm reader. You even stumbled upon articles that featured the Sheriff.

There he was plain as day on the front page when it was announced he had won the election the first time he ran several years back. You couldn’t help but notice the changes in his appearance and demeanor compared to the man you keep running into. He was a little slimmer, and he looked a lot happier, a little fuller of life, you decided was a good way to explain it. His smile was wider, and you could see the difference in his eyes as well. It was seeing how he was before the stress of the job began to take its heavy toll. He had on the same leather jacket as well, you were fairly certain, even though the one in the photograph hung a little looser.

You continued to skim through articles, piecing your way through the history of Knockemstiff. Little articles in black and white that persevered the history of this dark little town. You were beginning to realize this backwater town was a lot more tangled and complex than you originally believed. It was a tangled history, riddled with crime and unclosed cases, that people seem to have either forgotten or choose to ignore for their own sake. Your mind wandered back to the things Julie had told you about the Sheriff and him being corrupt. You wonder how much of what you read about linked back to him. Though you imagine if he has any sort of political connection, which a man like him must have, the things he was involved in probably didn’t even make it into the paper. The thought made you physically shiver.

You put the large leather portfolios of archives you took and put them back into their proper place on the self chronologically. You grabbed your sweater from the back of your chair, and pushed the chair back into place. Looking up at the clock on the wall, it was only just one in the afternoon. You decided to head down to the diner and grab a bite, and also visit Julie during her second shift. It was a short walk from the library to the diner. Everywhere felt like a short walk here, probably because everything in downtown was not much bigger than a few blocks. The majority of people lived far from the center of town, on their own land and farms.

The little bell on the door rang when you stepped in and Julie waved at you from behind the counter and pointed for you to grab an empty table in her section. You put your bag on the table and took a seat. It was a fairly busy time, most people who worked at the surrounding businesses coming in for their lunch break. Julie brought you over a coffee and then said she’d be back to chat when she got to take her five.

Lee hadn’t been able to go home since the phone call. The symptoms of his hangover were worsening and he was growing more irritable. His five o’clock shadow was still evident on his tired face and his head was pounding. He tried his best to just power through it but the sound of anyone trying to talk to him just made his ears ring.

After leaving the scene, he had to stop by his office and then he was on the phone for the better part of an hour fielding calls from frantic citizens not only of Knockemstiff but also Meade, where Laferty was from. Despite how horribly he felt, he tried his best to keep his temper level and just reassure people he had things under control. He was losing his patience.

He opened up his desk drawer and grabbed his bottle of asprin. Empty. He threw it into the small waste bin and got up abruptly grabbing his jacket off the hook and storming out. He didn’t tell anyone he was leaving and he didn’t care. It was a short walk to the drugstore from the station and he wouldn’t be five minutes. He just needed to do something to stop his head from hurting.

“Afternoon, Sheriff,” the pharmacist greeted when he walked in. He nodded his head upwards briefly to reply without having to talk. He just needed to get in and out. She went back to whatever she was working on when he came in, and he browsed the aisles for what he needed. After paying and walking out, he glanced in the direction of the diner when he was crossing the street. There you were, again. Sitting alone and chatting with the waitress that was refilling your coffee.

He let out a heavy sigh, and then continued walking. He didn’t want you to see him like this, hungover, unshaved, wrinkled uniform and heavy undereye bags from his lack of sleep. You looked- well, Lee thought you were the prettiest thing he’s seen in a while, maybe ever. There was something about you he couldn’t pinpoint. Maybe it was just because you weren’t from here. You were a fresh face, and not ruined by this town. There was a sweetness and an innocence in how you talked to him, because you didn’t know him like the rest of people here did. He liked that.

Even when he left the station for the day, he couldn’t even go home yet. He had a meeting at the bar with one of Brown’s lackeys. He was just supposed to collect his cut so he couldn’t imagine it would take long, but he was still annoyed. Stepping into the bar he looked around as he took off his hat. It was a little more crowded tonight then when he was here last. The red curtain was closed and his eyes lingered there for a moment before directing his attention to the man he recognized who was waving him over.

“Sheriff,” the man greets and Lee slides into the booth across from him.

“Hayward,” he replies. Without even needing to order, the bartender comes over bringing them a bottle of scotch and two glasses.

“You ever go back there?” Hayward asks, watching as a girl came out and brought a man behind the curtain who had been waiting at the bar.

“No,” Lee scoffs.

“They are amazing,” Hayward says, almost giddy. Lee feels sympathy towards the poor woman who had to take care of him. Lee doesn’t acknowledge the statement and just empties his glass and begins to pour himself a second.

“So, my cut?” Lee asks. Hayward frowns and goes into the breast pocket of his sports coat and pulls out an envelope of cash.

“You aren’t getting full,” the man says when Lee cocks a brow at the thinness of the envelope.

“Still?” Lee asks, pissed. Hayward nods. Lee’s jaw clenches.

“You didn’t keep things tidy on your end,” Hayward reminds him, “You got one job. Keep the cops out of our territory. We had two cruisers drive through last week. The only reason you’re getting anything at all is cause you managed to keep your people off us when we did the exchange with Deckard’s crew.”

The man finishes his drink, and then slaps the empty glass on the table. He pulls out his own envelope, which is much thicker than Lee’s and drops down more than enough for the drinks. He chuckles condescendingly and tells the Sheriff to get a dance. Fuck that. Lee takes the extra money and plans to just put it right in his pocket and go home. He finishes his third scotch and suddenly his headache was back. He felt worse than he did earlier today.

“What can I do for you, Sheriff?” a feminine voice asks, making him break his line of thought. He looks to his side and he recognizes her as one of the girls he sees bringing men to the back room, behind the velvet curtain. He shakes his head, and instead of leaving him alone, she slides into the booth next to him. Her hand grazes over his thigh. “You seem awful tense, Sheriff,” she says and then bites her lip.

He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t tempted. He knows she doesn’t actually want him, and it’s just an attempt to get him to spend money in the backroom. If he doesn’t focus his already hazing vision, maybe she could vaguely remind him of you. He can’t do it, but he wants to. Her hand moves up his leg and he pulls away. He adjusts his pants and she shrugs.

“Maybe next time then,” she winks before walking away. He rests his head back on the vinyl seat and sighs. He grabs his hat and jacket, leaving before he changes his mind. “Ask for Cherry when you come in, yeah?” she calls when he walks out.

You are just everywhere. You’re in his head and he doesn’t even know you. He needs to sleep, desperately, and part of him in the back of his mind hopes you’ll be there. When he wakes up, he doesn’t remember.

“Have you heard about the Church fundraiser coming up?” Julie asks. You shake your head. “It’s a pretty big deal here. Everyone participates.”

“What is it?” you ask, kicking off your slippers so you can sit crisscross on the couch.

“Bid-On-A-Basket,” she says casually, like it’s the most obvious thing.

“Never heard of it,” you reply, “It sounds fun. What is it?”

“All us single gals put together a picnic basket with everything for a lunch,” she explains, “and then all the eligible bachelors bid on the basket and a date with the girl who made it. Last year, the dreamiest guy, Bill Whittier, bought mine- it’s so fun. Me and Bill didn’t work out but it was a good time.”

“I don’t know anyone here,” you say hesitantly.

“Perfect way to get a date then,” she teases. You bite your lip. You aren’t sure about this.

“And what if some creep is the highest bidder?” you counter.

“You get a bad date story for your next date?” she poses. “Please,” she begs, “It’s for a good cause, all the money this year is going to help the Sunday school.”

“What if no one bids on it?” You rebut.

“Look at yourself,” she scoffs, “you’ll get bids. Trust me.” You roll your eyes.

“I’ll think about it,” you say finally. She smirks, completely planning to wear you down.

“Remember it’s for the kids,” she reasons, “It wouldn’t hurt to go and participate.”

“I said I’ll think about it,” you laugh.

Time passes and soon enough you get another call from Sandy, and you are suddenly back to taking care of Valerie. You had missed her, a lot actually. You definitely have gotten attached to her, and you think you’ve grown on her too. Sandy was vague this time for how long they’d be gone, but since the previous time went so smoothly, you didn’t worry about it.

About a week after Sandy and Carl left this time, there was another disturbing news report. You were sitting on the floor, changing Valerie and you had the television playing softly in the background. The news told the story of another body, this time found in the woods off of the highway. You finish changing the baby and hold her close, her little chin resting on your shoulder as you watch the news story. It was just like Julie had talked about. Another man, thirty years old. He was shot and his body abandoned. You jump at the knock at the front door.

You peep through the curtains, and you see the Sheriff waiting on the front porch. You wonder if he knows you’re there. Part of you almost wishes he knows it you here and he wanted to see you. It’s incredibly stupid on your part and you know better, but nonetheless, part of you hoped he came here for you. Very stupid. With Valerie on your hip, you open the door.

“I’m sorry, darling,” he says walking into the house. He stops in front of you and presses a kiss to Valerie’s forehead and she squeals happily seeing Lee. You close the door with your foot. “May I?” he asks, and opens his arms. You agree, based on Valerie’s reactions to him whenever she sees him. He takes her in his arms, and she starts playing with his tie. He loosens it so she can play with it and not choke him.

“What can I do for you, Sheriff?” you ask. He reacts in a way in a way you can’t really read, but you don’t press.

His mind just goes back to the woman a couple weeks back in the brothel who asked him the same thing, and that his mind immediately had gone to you. He just clears his throat and snaps himself out of that thought process.

“Um, I just came by to see Sandy,” he says, “But I can fathom a guess that she’s not here?”

“Excellent deduction,” you joke, and he smirks. Valerie has his tie in her mouth and is covering it in drool. He doesn’t even seem to care.

“Are you okay?” he asks, and you nod. “You looked a little scared when you answered.”

“Just watching the news before you showed up is all,” you explain, “They were talking about how there was another man found dead.”

“Ain’t got nothing to worry about,” he says, “We’re on top of it. I’m on my way over there now.”

“Can I ask you something?” you ask hesitantly.

“Of course, darling.”

“My friend, you probably know her- Julie Grady.”

“Yeah, nice kid,” he says, listening but gently pulling his tie from Valerie’s grasp. She starts playing with the flap of the pocket of his jacket.

Kid. You almost grimace. That’s right. Of course, Lee would view someone your age that way. You weren’t. You chastise yourself for even caring, but you decide to continue. You shouldn’t care how he sees you.

“Yeah- well, she told me there have been others,” you continue, “I also read up about it, just the newspapers at the library- but she said people thought it was some kind of serial killer… I just, I want to know what you think.”

“I don’t think know,” he answers honestly, a little taken aback, not expecting you to approach him with something this serious. “I doubt it,” he explains, “Serial killers stay close to home. Now those cases you read about, and these two we are looking at- they sound close together but logistically, they aren’t really. Two of those unsolved were in completely different states- just like this new one.”

“So, no traveling serial killer?” you chuckle, trying to sound lighthearted. He chuckles and shakes his head.

“Most people like that stay in one area,” Lee explains, “They work jobs, they have a home, you know? They tend to stay near where they live.”

“That makes me feel much better,” you answer honestly.

“You got nothing to worry about, and that’s a promise,” he grins, although he supposes coming from him that probably doesn’t mean much. Regardless, it makes you smile.

“Are you sure I can’t get you anything?” you offer again. He bites his lip, taking a moment to think.

“Sandy keeps a bag of candy in her cabinet,” he says, walking into the kitchen with you following close behind. He passes Valerie off to you and he chuckles under his breath at the state of his tie. He reaches up in the cabinet and pulls down a brown paper bag, filled with taffies and chocolates.

Something about this man who has a whole time scared of him playing with his niece and then stealing sweets from the cupboard is something you find so strangely endearing. He unwraps one of the brightly colored taffies and then puts the bag in his pocket.

“I gotta go,” he announces, “let me know if you hear from Sandy, yeah?”

“Of course,” you reply.

“Gonna head out to that scene, and do my report,” he discloses, not really sure why he’s telling you. “Then I have a meeting at the rectory about that fundraiser thing. Figure out security.”

“They need security at Bid-On-A-Basket?” you ask, with an eyebrow raised. He smiles.

“You going?” he asks, flirtatiously.

“Just seems weird to have police at a Church thing.”

“There’s been stupid fights,” he shrugs, “some guy will get outbid and cause a fuss. Nothing serious. Probably just gonna be me and a deputy in case. You going?”

“I don’t know, maybe,” you say sheepishly. “Why?”

He walks towards the front door, and you follow seeing him out.

“Cause I gotta know if I’ll be bidding on a basket,” he winks.

“You gonna start a fight if you don’t win it?” you joke.

“If it’s yours? Absolutely, darling.”

Taglist:

@adelaide-walker @thedepressolit @samanthadegaro @pyronack @greeneyedblondie44  @acciosiriusblack  @weenersoldierr @teenagemutant @witchybarb @iraot @my-love-darling @hold-me-like-a-heart-beat @swiftieandthewintersoldier @letsfly-andbe-free @rebekahdawkins @stiles-stilinski-24-dylan @hersilencedscreams @unsaltedalmonds @dangerdolns @vintagepigeon @bluebouquetcupcake29 @goslytherin @captainofallfandoms @buckistan @aynanasstuff @everything-is-all-clear @rosalynshields @tinynshykitten​ 

[florrickandassociates]

TGF Thoughts: 5x02-- Once there was a court...

Season five is off to a great start. I’m feeling more energized about TGF than I have in ages, maybe since the beginning of season three. After the mostly standalone premiere, I wasn’t sure what to expect from the rest of the season. Episode two introduced a lot of new elements that I’m intrigued by and excited about, so here’s hoping the rest of the season can sustain that energy. (Many) more thoughts under the cut.

And, again, since the most consistent thing about Tumblr is its inability to roll out new features that are actually helpful, here is a link to view the post so you don’t have to read it all on your dash. (Omg, Tumblr, not only do you force people to keep reading on their dashes but you also jump down to the middle of the post when the full version opens? Do you have ANYONE beta test these features?)

Reddick/Lockhart is bustling when the episode opens. The fact they’re calling it Reddick/Lockhart seems like an indication that Liz chose to partner with Diane—it's not. The firm just needs a name, and it can’t have Boseman in it. (The signage still says RBL... for now.)

Everyone in reception is talking animatedly, except for Carmen Moyo, who’s just taking it all in. You might be tempted to read her as nervous. You would be very, very wrong. But we don’t know that now. Right now, it wouldn’t be wrong to assume she’s Maia 2.0. This scene strongly parallels Maia’s first day at the firm (opening with the reception saying “Good morning” and the firm name, then showing new associates waiting for an orientation by David Lee). And in that scene, Maia is absolutely nervous, like you’d expect a new hire might be.  

Carmen focuses on another associate’s hand. I assume this is meant to be a parallel to how Maia fidgets with her rosary ring in that initial scene. Carmen then peels a price tag off her portfolio—possibly another Maia parallel, since the portfolio Diane gives Maia is such an important symbol in Maia’s arc.

I also see shades of Alicia and her first scene here—Alicia's silent and focuses on small details (the thread on Peter’s jacket) too.  

I don’t say any of this in hopes of comparing Carmen directly to either of those characters. Carmen is not like any other character this show has had before. But these parallels are quite good at establishing character, building intrigue, and showing contrast (even if you don’t see them as parallels, we’re still getting a lot about Carmen just from watching her reactions, even if we don’t yet have the context to understand how to read Carmen). Since I’m now thinking about Maia and Alicia, I’m also now thinking about how Carmen is different from them and triangulating her spot in this universe—that's a good thing. She’s not a copy of either character, but I understand a little more about what the writers are telling me about her from the parallels.

The RBL sign in the background is being taken off the wall. It falls and adds even more chaos to reception.

David Lee walks in and screams, “Stand up! Those seats are for clients.” This is the exact same language he uses in the 1x01 scene; this is definitely an intentional parallel.  

Btw Carmen already has more personality than Maia and she’s been in one episode so far! I didn’t hate 1x01 Maia, but I will say that nearly everything that intrigued me about early Maia was that I could project more about Alicia (whom I, obviously, care a lot about) onto her. I can and will compare Carmen to Alicia, but when I do, it won’t be because Carmen is an interesting lens through which to analyze Alicia... it will be because Alicia is interesting precedent to use to understand Carmen.  

I still hate Maia, yep.

David Lee accidentally instructs a client to stand and then has to save face, heh.  

In David’s tour of the office, we see the partners squabbling. Sounds about right. And STR Laurie is still a thing, which explains why David is there (though not why he is giving a tour).  

Throughout the tour, we get a lot of shots of Carmen. Again, she’s silent and looks like she could be nervous. (Spoiler: this is a fakeout and when you rewatch this scene, you can see what new cast member Charmaine Bingwa is doing here—expertly putting on a face that looks like anxiety in one context, but is actually just Carmen calmly sizing things up.)

Marissa eagerly joins the tour. “That’s right. They’re letting you play lawyer, Marissa. How nice,” David says. Carmen takes this in, too. “Fucking prick,” Marissa mutters. Carmen hears.

David Lee introduces “someone from HR” which is a great sign that HR is very effective at this firm.  

In the conference room, the partners are still arguing about who should replace Adrian. Diane tries the “all options are open to us and we plan to decide in the next 48 hours” strategy, but this audience is too smart for that. Madeline asks about the new leadership structure. (I am kind of hoping that one nice side effect of having to kind of shoot the season in a COVID bubble will be that we’ll get more small recurring characters. Madeline’s been around for a little while but we’re already seeing her get to do more this year.)

“Diane and I are going to run the firm together. For now,” Liz says. Oh, no, Liz, do not open the door to change. Letting the partners know you’re not sure is probably the worst strategy. You’ve gotta decide or they’ll sense weakness.  

“Just the two of you? A black firm being run by a white woman?” a partner asks. “Well, I’m not running it alone. I’m here to assist Liz,” Diane says, trying to deflect. “Really? Because she needs assistance?” he counters. Diane doesn’t know what to say, but she and Liz both know these questions aren’t going to go away.

HR is running an orientation for the new hires and it involves having them all take pieces of toilet paper. Man, I hate ice breakers. Carmen takes a moderate amount and then passes it to Marissa, who takes only one square. Carmen notes this and makes eye contact with Marissa. And this is where it starts to become obvious that Carmen is not nervous—just observant and not chatty. Carmen knows Marissa is one to watch from how David reacted to her presence. She gives Marissa a look that’s meant to be noticed and start a conversation. It works, and Marissa explains that for each square you take, you have to share a fact about yourself. Carmen hates this and hides the rest of the toilet paper so she only has one square.  

Liz tries to say there will be a discussion about the partnership, and Daniel (that’s what the captions call him, though they do reference him as “Barry” at one point but I'm like 99% sure I know which actor is Barry and it’s not him) says it feels like they’re just being told what the new state of things is. Liz says she hears him but right now they need a senior associate to backfill Lucca.

Daniel doesn’t think they need one. I don’t get why, unless it has to do with the budget cuts.  

“We need someone with real experience to take on her caseload,” Liz notes. Hell yeah you do!

Liz asks if any of the partners want to take over family law. None do.  

After the meeting, Liz asks Diane if she can call a head hunter. Diane approves. David Lee pops up to ask which one of them is taking Boseman’s office and they haven’t discussed it yet. I love that they managed to order a sign with their names on it before they’ve talked about how being partners will actually work.  

(Also, Adrian’s office is quite obviously going to end up with Liz. And it would be weird if it were Diane, anyway, because it’s Diane’s old office from Lockhart/Gardner and it would look it if she sat there again lol)

David notes that an empty corner office looks like failure. He is correct. He gives them until Friday to decide.

Marissa does not like the ice breaker at all and pointedly notes she only has one secret, and it is that she used to be married to a mime. She makes a whole bit out of it and then whispers to Carmen, “I usually just make things up.”  

Carmen’s next and she finally gets to speak her first words of the series. You know who else didn’t speak at all in her first scene? Alicia Florrick. Very different scenes, but I can’t help but think this is intentional. From what I’ve seen of Carmen, both she and Alicia use silence strategically and are comfortable with quiet. Alicia’s first scene is silent because she doesn’t need to use words to be expressive, but it does establish that she’s going to be a character with a lot of internal thoughts she won’t vocalize and that she’s observant and tries to maintain composure. Sure, you can watch the first scene of Pilot and just see a woman who’s stunned into silence, but when you watch it knowing Alicia and realize how much of the essential parts of her character are in her totally silent intro sequence that kicks off the show... it’s kind of amazing.

So comparing Carmen’s introduction to that? I mean this as a huge compliment. Carmen deploys silence for reasons both similar and different to Alicia. While Alicia uses silence to maintain some kind of boundary between her inner thoughts and the outside world, Carmen uses it to get a chance to observe and take things in without showing her cards. (We do see Alicia do that as well, especially at work, but I would call this a side-effect of Alicia being a quiet person rather than her intention; Carmen seems to be more conscious of how she uses her silence.)  

Carmen is from Victorville, California. That means nothing to me but I’m sure there’s some significance. Carmen mimics Marissa’s response when asked for her secrets—she also responds with, “secret,” emphasizing she only has one. But what she says next also shows her in contrast to Marissa. She says her secret is she hates games. We already know so much about her and she’s said like ten words!  

I think it’s smart to set Carmen up as a contrast to other characters. I know who Carmen is not because of how she differs from more familiar presences like Alicia, Maia, and Marissa. Marissa hates ice breakers, but her reaction to them is to use them as an opportunity to say something funny and over the top. Many others (including probably both Alicia and Maia) would likely resent the activity but play along and say something unremarkable (I could see Alicia overthinking it and sharing something surprisingly quirky though!). Carmen just does not give a fuck, and in a different way than Marissa doesn’t give a fuck. Marissa insinuates that she thinks the whole activity is stupid... Carmen just flat out says it. I would not pull this move on my first day of a new job! And that is the point—who is this person who is so self-assured she’s willing to insult HR on her very first day of her very first job as a lawyer?  

ALL OF THIS FROM A FEW WORDS AND SOME WELL-ACTED GLANCES! As I said, I’m very intrigued by Carmen. I have some questions about the logistics of this plot, her endgame, and how she’ll function when brought into the firm drama/debate plots, but for now, I only have good things to say.  

Liz interrupts the ice breaker to announce that everyone will be assigned a mentor. She then pauses to greet Marissa, which Carmen, again, notices. Liz is really there to say that they’ll be working on client maintenance that day, and each new hire will get to help with one of their clients. When she reads off their top clients, all the hands shoot up—except Carmen’s.

Madeline’s last name is Gilford. Noted. John’s last name is Wilson.  

No one raises their hand to assist with Oscar Rivi, who is in a maximum-security prison. Carmen confidently raises her hand.  

Barry’s last name is Poe. Noted.

Marissa and Carmen exchange glances. Super curious to see how this evolves. There are too many Marissa/Carmen exchanges in this episode for the writers to not plan to have them interact more in the future.

I’m kind of loving that it seems like the show’s leads are now Diane, Liz, Marissa, and Carmen. Diane’s obviously great, Liz is someone who’s been deserving of leading material for ages, Carmen seems interesting, and I’m so impressed they have managed to make Marissa, usually good in small doses, into a character who can handle larger plots without wearing on my patience (like that awful Elsbeth centric episode of Wife).  

Diane has a client who received a summons directly, which Diane finds strange. But, since she is already working with this client on the same case (teaching kids during COVID) in another court, Diane is optimistic about this second suit. She thinks it could set a good precedent.  

Diane introduces Phoebe, an associate who will help out on the case. Diane says she’s not personally going because it’s a formality and Diane needs to work on the brief. I’m like 99% sure Diane isn’t personally going because Diane’s role here is to convince the client she’s getting senior-level attention while having junior people do the work, but nice story!  

Diane asks Marissa to go along with Phoebe. Marissa thinks she’s going to get to argue in court... Diane says no, Marissa gets to hand hold a client.  

Oscar Rivi is basically Lemond Bishop, which is the only explanation I have for why RL would represent him. And, you’ll recall, I didn’t understand why RL would represent Bishop either. But we’ll just have to go with it.  

(I think representing multiple drug lords is probably a bigger PR issue for RL than having a white partner! How come no one ever talks about this! Actually, new complaint: wasn’t Liz, who now has more power than before, the one who was most against representing Bishop?)  

(I guess it may make sense that she’d be more okay with this Rivi dude than Bishop. Whatever Rivi’s done, I don’t think he’s threatened Liz’s kid like Bishop did!)  

(Also, I’m fine with them switching it up and suddenly having this new drug kingpin. Mike Colter is obviously unavailable since he’s a lead on Evil, and I was tired of Bishop anyway. If the writers stop using Bishop and Sweeney as shorthands for corruption I will be very happy; I don’t think there’s much more mileage left there. Speaking of, Dylan Baker popped up in 2x02 of Evil!)  

“I don’t want you to be intimidated,” Barry tells Carmen as they arrive at Rivi’s prison. Carmen reads articles about Rivi on her phone, saying she’s taking notes. Barry tells Carmen to “sit, listen, leave.” But then he discovers his ID is expired (he didn’t get it renewed during the pandemic) and he can’t go visit Rivi as a result. Carmen says she’s fine alone—she'll sit, listen, leave. She’s calm and not at all cocky as she says it, and it really takes until she’s actually talking with Rivi to realize that she’s not (just?) a hypercompetent law school grad trying to impress. She doesn’t seem to care at all what people, no matter how powerful, think of her, as long as she’s able to find security of any sort. (Tbh, it is kind of amazing she doesn’t get fired in this episode.)  

(I’m getting ahead of myself but in Alicia’s first ep, she also changes up strategies on the partners. Alicia does it almost without realizing she’s gone against their wishes—she's just sure of the right strategy—and Carmen does it much more intentionally.)  

Marissa and Phoebe can’t locate Judge Wackner’s court. Marissa asks a security guard she’s friendly with (of course she is) for help. He says there’s no Judge Wackner there, and the security guard notices that it’s a summon for a “9 ¾ Circuit.” The guard laughs at the Harry Potter reference; Marissa is not amused. They leave the courthouse when Marissa spots a sign for “9 ¾". She follows the sighs down an alley. Phoebe wants nothing to do with this; Marissa and the client are intrigued. They end up in a store called Copy Coop and are directed to a warehouse.

In the warehouse, an argument is resolved through Rock, Paper, Scissors. Then it’s Marissa’s turn. She asks for a continuance just like she was supposed to, but she uses the wrong phrasing. Judge Wackner notices. That’s when Marissa notes she’s not a lawyer, and Wackner responds that he’s not a licensed judge. So it’s fine that Marissa isn’t a lawyer.  

Marissa tries to protest again that she’s not a lawyer, and Wackner basically tells her to proceed anyway. The client wants to stay, weird as this fake court seems.

Carmen reads with Rivi. She stares at him, getting him to speak first. His translator asks if there’s another lawyer with her; she just introduces herself. The translator does a terrible job of translating Rivi’s complaints, sharing very little of what Rivi said with Carmen.

Unsurprisingly (to me at least, because scenes like this ALWAYS have the twist where a character doesn’t let on that they speak the language until the exact right moment), Carmen speaks Spanish.

She lets Rivi know she speaks Spanish AND insults the translator in one go. Pretty big move. That gets Rivi’s attention and he kicks out the translator. He asks who she is and she repeats her name again (characters reacting like this will never not remind me of “Who are you?” “Kalinda.”).

Carmen notes that she’s just out of law school, explaining that’s why she’s eager to help. She doesn’t reveal that by mistake—she's using it to her advantage.  

Credits! As I predicted, things are blowing up again this week like normal. No more kittens and puppies. There’s a new couch that blows up in the credits. Wackner’s desk also makes it in. I can’t remember if the purses were in this position before; they might be new. All the exploding TVs show footage of January 6th (which I hear is going to be a major theme of the season, though it’s not heavily featured in this episode). And the zoomed in shot of the closet (that I’ve never really liked) is gone, as is the falling curtain!  

I still hate the font of the logo for this show. I also don’t understand why the show seems to have three logos—the one that’s the TGW logo but with “fight”, the one in the credits, and whatever the one they’ve come up with for this season’s marketing materials is. I like that they’re trying with the marketing of this season but I don’t get why the show has three logos.  

While I’m talking about the marketing, can we just talk about the “Goodbye Lucca” graphic the official social media account posted? It had a fucking crown drawn over her head like this is a 2013 Tumblr shitpost!!! Who are they targeting with this?! WHO ARE THEY MARKETING TO? DOES THIS WORK ON ANYONE??? It literally says, “Chi-Town” on it. I cringed so hard. Sometimes I feel like the marketing of this show is meant to cater to the people who would, like, watch the credits of last week’s episode and be like, “Yes! It IS all now puppies and kittens! Everything bad in the world has been resolved!”  

But hey, at least it’s better than the absolute trash they used to post for TGW. Remember when there’d be episodes about Alicia making career moves and they’d be like, “#TeamPeter or #TeamWill????”  

OR, OR OR OR, the fucking time they tried to crosspromote TGW and the Victoria’s Secret Fashion show (yes) with a tweet that read, “All ‘Saint Alicia’ needs is a pair of wings&she practically turns into an Angel.” I... have no words.  

Hey, Caleb is back! I was not expecting them to actually wrap up his arc with Liz. I think I’m actually pretty thankful it’s ending like this—he comes back for what I assume is one last episode and I don’t actually have to deal with the Liz/Caleb plot. Apparently the writers were setting that up so they could do some plots about power dynamics and interracial couples and who is seen as having power. Caleb and Liz were going to have an encounter with the police, who were going to listen to Caleb instead of Liz even though this encounter would’ve taken place in Liz’s house and Liz is the name partner and Caleb the employee. Interesting enough, but anything boss/employee just squicks me out and I don’t need it around and Liz deserves better.

But I did like Caleb as a character, so I’m glad he gets an exit, unlike past characters who have just disappeared. (Remember Robyn Burdine? Or that time Taye Diggs was a major character for two seconds?)  

Liz was NOT expecting to see Caleb as a candidate for Lucca’s old role. Things are instantly awkward. I guess Caleb left STR Laurie?  

Diane immediately senses that things are awkward with Liz and Caleb. Caleb is very professional throughout all this. Diane gets an important call and leaves the room, so Caleb and Liz can chat privately.  

Caleb says he thought Liz was reaching out; Liz says she should’ve reached out but things ended abruptly. Love that Caleb checks that no one else is in the room with Liz before getting even more personal. He says they should just act like nothing ever happened between them and Liz asks if he can do that. “I’m the employee. Of course I can,” he says. This is why you don’t sleep with employees.  

He says he really does want the job and he liked the firm. Liz says she’ll talk to Diane. Caleb says if it doesn’t work out he’ll be fine.  

Phoebe tells Diane about 9 ¾ and Diane does not understand... at all. “If it has no power, and it doesn’t have jurisdiction, what does it have?” Diane wonders.  

A little more on the case: RL is representing a woman who taught a small group of students during the pandemic, and some parents are suing her for preaching socialism at the children.  

The woman suing did NOT like being called a Karen by her daughter or being compared to the family from Parasite. She wants a refund.  

Marissa objects and makes up her own grounds, realizing that since it’s not a real court, she can object for any reasons she wants—as long as they follow common sense.  

These scenes could so easily feel ridiculous, like a gag that goes on for too long. They do not. There’s just enough zany humor and theatrics to make the 9 ¾ court feel surreal. And, most helpfully, Wackner is a GREAT judge. He is engaged with the work and only concerned with the facts and arguments rather than politics. He’s tough but fair. He’s direct and he maintains control over his court. He’d be one of the best judges in a normal court. His sincerity is enough to make you wonder why courts DON’T operate like this. It’s easy to see why the characters are sold on this BS-free, rational, and effective system, even if it makes no sense that it would exist and it has no power. It’s simultaneously idealistic (if only things were resolved fairly) and threatening (how can something like this exist?! What does it mean that the real courts are so ineffective that there’s a need for something like this?! What happens if this goes beyond what are basically mediations for simple issues?).

This type of thought experiment is where TGF excels. I think they were going for something like this with Memo 618 (which hasn’t gone away!), but that arc always felt like it was on the verge of going off the rails. Mandy Patinkin’s performance and the writing for the 9 ¾ court already have me more invested in this than I was in Memo 618.  

Marissa tries yet again to wait for help to arrive, but Wackner insists that they keep things moving. She tries to stall and ends up referencing George Clooney. Wackner cuts through that, too—he hates speeches “unless I'm giving them, and even then I’m just trying to stall.” Then he holds up a sign that reads, “CUT THE SHIT” and the audience laughs. He says this isn’t the kind of court where you can just run out the clock. Kind of ridiculous that real court IS that kind of court, no? (And that’s why this is an effective device so far.) (I say so far because I have watched content from these writers for long enough to know that things that work in small doses or initially can go wildly off the rails.)  

Marissa changes strategies and does what she does best: she goes on instinct and adjusts her strategy as she goes. She eventually catches the woman accusing her client of teaching socialism in a lie about Parasite. It’s very Legally Blonde and very smart of Marissa. And I’m rather proud of myself for seeing what Marissa was doing (getting the woman to commit to a time frame and then baiting her to talk about a moment that proved the time frame fake) before she revealed what she was doing.  

Sarah Steele is so good in this scene. I love her smile when she realizes the woman took the bait, and that she reacts with “AHA!” instead of something more proper. This is pretty much the perfect court for Marissa.  

Diane and Jay arrive; are confused.  

Carmen leaves Rivi after quite a bit of time has passed, making Barry nervous. Carmen tells him very little and repeats that she sat, listened, and left. She told the translator to go fuck himself (almost in those words) so she’s gotta know that Barry will hear what happened from someone. She does not care. She lies to Barry like it’s nothing.  

Diane does not understand the 9 ¾ court, nor does she understand why a non-lawyer like Marissa is arguing. She does not understand why losing in this venue would matter or why a lawyer she knows (ha, I looked him up to see if he’d been on Wife or Fight before, and he has... as a totally different character!) is there.  

“Okay, I’m losing my mind. Look, this is not legal. We have got to get out of here,” Diane says. Toni, the client, wants to stay.

I don’t actually know the answer to this—would there be repercussions to someone who is a member of the bar participating in something like this? Everyone knows it’s not real or binding, so nothing is being misrepresented, but this FEELS illegal?  

Toni notes that a lot of people suing her are there watching, so walking out or losing would look bad. She also likes Judge Wackner because he is “better than the judges in real court.”

“Diane, what is real?” the client asks when Diane points out again that this court is fake. The client’s spent 8 months on this case in limbo, so this feels like reality to her. Fair point.  

Diane chats with the other lawyer and asks what he’s doing here. He says he’s getting paid—with business down and court dockets backlogged (how much would that affect a large firm that settles most cases out of court? I’m actually curious about this), it’s a good source of money.  

Diane realizes it’s basically arbitration. Then says she doesn’t understand anything anymore. The other lawyer replies, “Sure you do. That’s why this is throwing you. Welcome to 2021.” Yup.  

Diane goes with it. A former teacher is on the stand. He’s got a grudge and wants money, so he’s helping out. He tries to say something that is the most obvious hearsay ever... and Wackner has no problem with it. Marissa likes that.  

Wackner basically says he’s fine with hearsay because he can use his brain to figure out what’s real and what’s fake, just like we all do every day. Crosstalk is also allowed.  

Wackner also doesn’t allow for bullshit breaks where lawyers tell clients what to say, because he “likes the truths found in sudden utterances.” All his rules make a lot of sense. They are all also counter to every single sneaky legal strategy these characters tend to use.

Toni made a comment that she “couldn’t fall in love with anyone who voted for Trump.” That gives a point to the plaintiff. Diane notes that this belief is shared with most of the country, and Wackner asks her if she shares it. “I’m not the question,” Diane replies, because she definitely doesn’t want to talk about her husband who worked in the Trump administration.  

Wackner flat out tells Diane that Marissa should argue instead of her. “Marissa is not a lawyer,” Diane tries to say. “Well, I’m not a judge!” Wackner responds. And that’s it for the day.

Diane asks Jay for intel, and then we get one of the most effective Jay scenes in a while—he bonds with the Copy Coop security guard, who only has good things to say about Wackner. I like how the writers use COVID in this episode—they treat it like it’s recent past (fingers crossed) and reference it when it makes sense, like how the courts are backlogged, or this guard was laid off.  

The security guard notes that he thinks Wackner is building something good in his spare time. He also notes that Wackner is a big Grateful Dead fan.

Carmen takes it upon herself to visit someone else in prison to help Rivi. She points out they’re under surveillance and convinces this other dude to take the fall for Rivi so he can go free. It’s very smart. I assume this is all her own strategy, as we see her look up this other dude before she’s even met with Rivi, though it’s possible Rivi came up with some of it.  

There is something about Carmen’s demeanor when she deals with clients that is very Alicia-like in interesting ways. She’s very direct and unflappable in a way that people seem to take to (remember how all the creeps loved Alicia?), and she only shows emotion when she decides to. The similarities stop there. Carmen doesn’t seem remorseful or conflicted (Alicia always did). Sociopathic definitely isn’t the right word for her, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say it didn’t cross my mind. Carmen knows that her clients are bad guys. That doesn’t trouble her. And she doesn’t try to take the easy way out—she does more than she needs to. I don’t know what she’s really trying to do here, but I suspect she does.  

Carmen is 28, just fyi.  

Liz gets a call from Charles Lester. Obviously, Lester now works for Rivi, because Rivi is New Bishop. (Usually I’m a bit against saying any character is the new version of an old one, like how Lucca was not the new Kalinda (even if she was brought in to bring new energy to the space Kalidna occupied) or how Carmen is not the new Lucca (same), but I’m pretty comfortable saying Rivi is New Bishop. He’s not the same personality, but he... is New Bishop.)  

Lester notes that Rivi only wants to meet with Carmen from now on. Liz does not understand this and she’s not thrilled with it. She notes that Carmen is a first year who has been there for two days, but she doesn’t want to lose Rivi’s business so she goes along with it. Was that Carmen’s endgame? Job security? Does she not care about the RL job and see a good opportunity to... just represent Rivi without a firm behind her? I can’t tell.

(This is where I could see this arc faltering. I get why Liz keeps Carmen on—she doesn’t want to lose the client—but I don’t really understand why Liz wants Rivi as a client. Losing Carmen who’s been there for two days and Rivi who she probably doesn’t want to represent seems like a fine outcome to me. And, beyond that, if Carmen doesn’t care about the firm and also doesn’t need them, what’s in it for her to stay? I don’t think she really cares that the firm would have more resources to use in defending Rivi. Like, why isn’t the outcome here just that Carmen teams up with Lester and leaves RL behind?)

Diane listens to the Grateful Dead and writes down lyrics she can use in court. Kurt gets home from work. Diane asks him if he thinks she should give up her name partnership since it’s a black firm. Kurt asks if she’s the best lawyer there. She says no, but she’s one of the best, and besides, it’s a bad look and she wants to do what’s right for the firm. “You and I disagree on so much. You obviously ask my opinion because you know that I will argue something you know you won’t,” Kurt says. This is a very good, and very accurate, response.

Diane keeps going, though. Kurt plays along and starts talking about identity politics. Diane starts debating back, ignoring that Kurt is not really wanting to play devil’s advocate. Kurt doesn’t give Diane an easy out and tells her she’s right—she should step aside. That’s not what she wanted to hear. Kurt laughs and then goes to take a shower.  

Liz is eyeing Adrian’s office when Carmen walks up. She’s invited Carmen to talk to her. She asks her how things are going. Carmen just wants to know if she did something wrong. Carmen says she likes the firm and it’s great to be out of the legal clinics.  

Liz shares the news that Rivi only wants Carmen going forward. Carmen is pleased and says that’s surprising... though she looks more pleased than surprised.  

Liz suggests maintaining a professional distance, to which Carmen replies “I’m very professional.” “Oh, I don’t doubt it,” Liz tries to backtrack. “Is the firm dissatisfied with my work?” Carmen asks bluntly. Liz says no. “It’s my intention to treat all my clients like humans. Even the ones who might be murderers, or definitely are murderers. And I think Mr. Rivi might be responding to that because it’s something that he hasn’t received at this firm previously,” Carmen notes. This is QUITE the tone to take with your boss.

One question I have—and this is mostly inspired by the recap at I think Vulture?-- is to what extent Carmen knows what she’s doing. It seems like a lot. I can’t tell how much Carmen knows vs how much Carmen THINKS she knows. She’s definitely smart, and I don’t think she is an idealist (when she says her intention is to treat her clients like humans, she means that’s her strategy), but she is young and new to the law and only out for herself, which makes her vulnerable.  

Liz does not take well to Carmen’s talk and notes she’s talking about her personal safety. Carmen thanks her and says she’d understand if Liz doesn’t want her on the case.

There is something a little unnerving about Carmen. She keeps saying things that are boldly inappropriate but masked by how professional and correct her arguments sound (like the line about treating clients like humans). And she has a way of gaining power over a conversation. Liz squirms way too much in that conversation and loses some of her control as a result.  

I just need to know more about her!!! The fact that I can’t understand her makes her immediately interesting.  

Diane and Liz interview Julius for Lucca’s position. They all know it would be a demotion for him, but they’re seriously considering it. I feel like this would look awful for the firm and they are going to handwave it anyway after a few lines about how bad it would look.  

Diane quotes the Grateful Dead in court and it works. The other lawyer tries to quote songs too... it does not work.  

Carmen gets Rivi a bunch of candy bars from the court vending machine so he can have a snack he enjoys. The security guard doesn’t want to let Rivi eat them, but Carmen is right that this is permissible. The guard smashes the bars in defeat. Carmen opens one for Rivi.  

It is a little distracting to see the main characters pretend that COVID is in the past when the extras have masks, but honestly, that’s kind of what life is like right now?

Carmen zones out a little in court—not sure if she just does that or if she is trying to look unfamiliar with the rules so people will go easy on her/have low expectations. I think it’s a combination of both, considering that we’ve seen her laser-focus on things elsewhere in the episode AND she tells the judge it is her first day in court.  

Court stuff happens; Carmen’s strategy works.  

The judge tries to give Carmen advice and a warning. Liz is also there, watching, which is good because I was shocked anyone would let Carmen do this unsupervised.  

Carmen is also kind of like if you removed all of Maia’s worst traits (her selfishness, her spoiled brat attitude, her sense of entitlement) and skipped right to her willingness to partner with Blum.

Liz and Carmen talk again, this time about the reputation of the firm. Liz notes that Carmen is clearly capable and reminds her sternly that she needs to conduct herself in a manner that does not put the firm at risk and that’s the only reminder she’s going to get. Carmen twirls a pen and stares at it instead of listening to Liz. She says she’s just listening like she’s perfectly innocent. It’s the right thing to say and, again, it’s SUPER UNNERVING.  

“Wow. You really don’t give a shit what people think about you, do you?” Liz says in frustration. “I’m here to do a good job for my clients,” Carmen notes. Is she??? Does she just not care who she’s representing and want to do a good job, and that’s her whole motivation?? I would find that interesting but I need more to believe it. She’s so perplexing.

(Again, I don’t really get why Liz hasn’t fired her, because if she and Carmen keep having these interactions, Liz IS going to end up ceding all of her power and looking weak. But maybe Liz is as intrigued as I am.)

Liz also tells Carmen she’s going to be her mentor. Carmen says thanks and that she respected Liz’s father. Liz does NOT take that well. Audra’s reaction—a mix of shock, irritation, and confusion—is perfect here. I think Carmen is trying to say that she respected Carl Reddick—but she has no such respect for Liz. (It could also be about the sexual harassment, but I don’t think that’s public knowledge.)  

I noticed earlier that the courtroom was #305 and was wondering why they chose that number (it’s similar to Courtroom 302, the book that inspired the bond court arc, which is why 305 stuck in my mind). I see now that the Copy Coop’s address is 305. Heh.  

Turns out that the woman suing Toni is someone who would break COVID protocol and be generally terrible. I’m shocked.

Wackner decides to skip closing arguments and rule. He sides with Toni.  

See, this is where this kind of thing is dangerous. Wackner is great and fair. But you can’t really replicate a system like this (though I also think this system would fail if replicated on too large of a scale; the reason it works is that everyone involved is buying into it and if it were to be corrupted no one would buy into it unless forced to—and if people are forced to buy into an extrajudicial system then that’s its own problem). What if some other judge were to just decide to skip closing arguments or decide suddenly a trial was over? That could be unfair in so many different ways.  

After the resolution of the case there’s clapping and even Diane is surprised at how reasonable the verdict was.

Wackner then insists that everyone shake hands because “the thing we all crave most is respect and acknowledgement.” They also have to say, “I respect and I love you.” And they do! And no one even seems that unhappy with it Marissa and Toni are super into it.

And, someone in the gallery wants to get Marissa’s number because she did such a good job. Yep, sounds about right.

Diane fills Liz in, and Liz can’t believe it. Liz wants to hire Wackner (jokingly). Then she says she wants Julius since they know and trust him. Diane’s good with that, but she also chooses this moment to playfully let on that she knows Liz slept with Caleb. We’ve seen Diane observe Liz’s reaction to Caleb/mentions of Caleb all episode, and I don’t think it’s coincidental that Diane brings this up now, and in a friendly way. Diane doesn’t need to bring it up. I don’t think Diane needs the answer. I think she just wants to throw Liz off without making it obvious that’s what she’s doing.

I really, really hate to say it, because my whole thing about this season is wanting to see Liz be a great manager, but I don’t... actually think... Liz is a great manager? She’s second-guessing herself far too much. She’s more thrown in this scene than Carmen, who has like two days of experience, is by anything she encounters. And worse, she doesn’t hide it when she’s thrown. I think Liz is very smart and capable, but this episode is a pretty good case for why she might not be able to manage alone.

I know I’ve said that I want to see Liz manage and think she’d be good at it. I still think she could be. But I’ve also tended to think that Liz is a good manager and Adrian talks down at her, and I’ve dismissed some of her less strategic ideas as the fault of the Adrian/Liz dynamic. But nothing in this episode seems out of character, so now I’m less sure. (And to be clear, Liz not being a great manager isn’t a problem with the show, it’s actually pretty interesting to me.)  

(Here are some of the things Liz has done in this episode alone that she needs to stop doing to be more effective: 1) Everything about her reaction to Caleb (and the fact she slept with him-- and yes I would, and did, say this about Will too so this is not a double standard!) 2) Not having a clear plan when meeting with the partners, even though she—and not Diane—is the one who is seen as having power. 3) Not being able to hold her own nearly as well as she should be able to with Carmen. I’m curious to see how the other partners hold up, and in fairness to Liz, I may be able to make this criticism of any character who doesn’t just immediately fire Carmen.)  

And, I say all of this now because Diane in this scene is SO smart and SO strategic. She mentions Caleb to disarm Liz, then casually notes that she thinks Liz should take the corner office since it’s a black firm.  

Liz isn’t sure if she should thank Diane for that (it is a little patronizing) but she does anyway.

Diane has another “last thing” to say, and it’s that she wants to bring on another partner, a black one. She wants to be in the discussion and to retain a name partner position. Liz says yes, as long as she has any power over the decision. This is a very smart move for Diane. It’s a compromise that’s to her benefit, and she makes the request of Liz at exactly the right time. I think Diane likes Liz as a person and wants to work with her, but she’s definitely buttering her up. This is kind of like an audition to show Liz that she should stick with Diane—Diane will be friendly with her! Diane won’t judge (but definitely knows about!) her indiscretions. Diane is reasonable and not power-hungry! Diane is understanding!  

(And again, to be clear, I don’t think Liz is falling for Diane’s trap or anything. If Diane is smart enough to plan all this out, Diane is absolutely someone you’d want to keep on as a name partner. It’s just that Diane showing how smart she is, is a pretty stark contrast to Liz getting disrespected by a first-year associate.)  

(And, because I feel like I'm being quite harsh on Liz, I don’t think Liz has handled the Carmen situation badly... yet. I just see signs that Carmen is able to shift the balance of power in her favor without really trying, and that Liz is getting flustered. I think Liz mentioning the mentorship is a way of Liz asserting power, and I think/hope that now that Liz knows the situation, she will try to regain control. And, I could very easily see this same plot happening but with Diane—it's just that there are a few other plots where Liz seems flustered in this episode alone, so it feels like a pattern. I’ll be looking out for more of this.)

Marissa and Carmen, both with large folders of casework, get in an elevator together. “So. I guess it begins,” Marissa says as the episode ends. I very much want to see more of Marissa and Carmen interacting. Mostly, I just want to see what Carmen does when she’s in situations that aren’t about representing a client or defending her work. I know what type of lawyer and employee she is, but who is she as a person?  

Wow, this might be the most I’ve written about characters on TGF—as opposed to plots—in quite a while. I think that’s what has me so excited about this season. Carmen is interesting as a character because she’s so unique (or, perhaps, because she feels so much like a part of this universe yet so little like any other character—that's why I keep trying to compare her to others and find out where to place her). The 9 ¾ court is interesting because Wackner is so grounded, because it challenges Diane’s sense of reality in a way that’s new and interesting (this whole series is about making reality seem like it’s shifting under your feet; this is a new take on a familiar theme), and because it is a great match for Marissa’s personality and will give her a lot of opportunities for growth. It seems like we’re heading for some interesting material with Diane and Kurt, and there’s been a little bit of a tense undercurrent in their interactions in these first two episodes—I truly can’t tell if it’s supposed to be part of their banter or if there are mounting frustrations; I think the former but could see it being the latter. And, as I’d hoped, Liz is getting a lot more material.  

[trifoliumrex]

Fresh Blood Chapter 1

Your money troubles drive you to make a someone what desperate move. For a quick buck you decide to take advantage of the newly revealed vampires and sell your blood at a more reputable clinic. What could go wrong? Especially when you catch the eye of a beautiful Stanger.

Word count : 4532

updates Fridays, tags will update each chapter.

Unfortunately RM, V, and JK are not in this fic though they may be alluded to

Thanks to @slaughter-mama for all her incredible work as beta

A03 link

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31734712

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https://trifoliumrex.tumblr.com/post/653732705819869184/fresh-blood-chapter-2

The clinic is clean and mind numbingly quiet, the smell of cleaner making the air stuffy with its sterile scent. You look down at your hands and are tempted to bite your nails, a habit you thought had long been a part of your past. Your teeth chew on the soft flesh of your cheek, doing nothing to dissuade the nervous itch, the idea more tempting than ever given your current situation. Shoving them under the crooks of your knees, you sit on them not wanting to damage the nail beds like you had in your careless youth. You weren't going to let your nerves take away from your hard-won victory, even as cool sweat ran down your back in anticipation.

Donating blood was something you were quite nervous about. Well, being a live donor, anyway. The old fashioned way of needles, tubes and the works were no problem for you, in the rare occasions you had blood work done. This way of donating blood though, you hadn't ever done, not once in your adult life. The thought of letting someone, a stranger, from a different species at that, bite you, and more concerning, taste you? You weren't scared of vampires like most of your peers but it just seemed so intimate and so personal.

It wasn’t dangerous, you assured yourself again, you knew the rules, just about everyone did now, and this clinic was as reputable as they came. You had heard about back alley clinics where girls went in and agreed to all sorts of “special requests”. Clinics that were shut down the next day with donors found in the back allies with marks from differing sets of teeth. You had doubted that such places were even real and if they were this wasn’t one of those places, so it didn't matter. You give your head a little shake to dispel the notion. This one would have someone come check before, during and after the procedure. They vetted donors and recipients. They had organic orange juice and a cookie waiting for you! Besides all that, the fact was you needed the money.

Your manager, Craig, the source of all your problems, had been cutting back on your hours lately. Not only did he play favorites, he was the self-appointed office creep, everyone knew it and no one seemed to care. You had complained to the HR department about various incidences; when his hand on your shoulder started to linger just a bit too long, when he would come too far into your cubicle essentially trapping you, looking down like you were prey. Unsurprisingly, no help came, no investigations, no other witnesses. As a customer service rep, you were the lowest rung on the ladder and no one higher up gave a shit. It was hard to be afraid of the idea of vampires who for the most part didn't seem to get up to much when the mundane creeps were already so prevalent.

So now here you are, struggling financially. You had burned through what modest savings you had managed to gather before your manager had taken a little too much notice of you. Blood clinics like this offered good, quick pay and you were getting desperate.

You didn't live an extravagant lifestyle, far from it, but working at Park Industries you did have to meet a specific dress code and needed a place close to work in the downtown area since you didn't have a car and needed quick access to the subway. Your apartment was shit and still almost out of your budget. It was a scam in your option but you craved the independence that working in the city afforded you. You haven't lived there long but you would do what you needed to avoid moving back to your home town. Your manager sucked but the work, though difficult at times, didn't worry you.

You look up with a start realizing the nurse was calling your name. You flush and smile at her apologetically hoping she only called the once and stand up on, you are happy to note, legs that are only slightly shaky. She seems annoyed but she is trying to hide it for you, or at least trying to appear like she's hiding it from you.

She leads you back to what could be a doctor's office save for the couch on one end and the lack of the exam table. But the sinks there and even the little jar of cotton balls. It's almost comforting how mundane the room is. The couch is leather and you wonder if that makes it easy to clean. You let out a nervous giggle preferring to stand in the corner across from the couch, watching as the nurse ignores your anxious body language.

“The client will be by, in a moment,” she says putting a clip style monitoring device on your finger. She flashes what seems like a practiced smile, with teeth that are too white, but you offer her a smile anyway. You were here kind of late after your shift and maybe you were the last client of the day keeping her from going home. Or maybe she was just unpleasant, hard to say. “They will knock first and once you give permission they will enter. If at any point you would like to stop just take the monitor off your finger, alright? We’ll have someone come right in.” You hadn't noticed anyone else when you came to the clinic but maybe you just hadn’t been looking in the right place.

You swallow and nod. She puts a hand on your shoulder. You can tell it’s meant to be comforting, but it comes across a bit condescending. She seemed to be able to tell how nervous you were though so you try and at least appear calmer. You don’t think you are successful. “Anything happens and this will let us know right away.” She taps the monitor and flashes you another phony smile “Just remember that the act itself makes your blood more attractive to other potential clients.” Vampires, you think derisively, she should just say the word. “It also forms a temporary bond that can become permanent from repeated donation. We highly recommend that you return to this clinic if you wish to donate again to avoid accidental repeat donation to the same client and to make sure you get any open wounds sealed before leaving.” Her speech was well rehearsed, easy and almost natural. “You’ll do fine” she winks in a distinctly unfriendly way as she walks out the door gently shutting it behind her.

You shudder slightly. She didn’t tell you anything the forms you had just signed didn’t tell you or the multiple brochures you had read in the lobby didn’t spell out in a variety of clip art presentations. You knew about the blood bond side effects but weren’t particularly worried. Whoever you donated too would be able to hear your heartbeat after one feeding, but only if they were relatively close. The other part though, other vampires being more attracted to you? Even with where everything was now with rouge attacks almost unheard of, it was still a bit frightening even if you knew that most vampires as a whole were pretty much like normal people. It was almost negligible anyway as they needed to be right on you to smell the other vamps on you unless you were actively bleeding.

There was a knock at the door. Two raps in quick succession. Confident and sure unlike your repose. “Uhm, you can come in?”

An hour before his appointment slot at the clinic, Jimin loosened his tie slightly, glaring into his reflection in the window, glancing down at his watch. It was getting late, and the clinic (for fucking vampires no less) wasn’t open for 24 hours, not even dusk to dawn hours. He didn’t want to miss his appointment after the day he had had. He had put off his feeding for too long and was becoming a bit testy. He let out an angry huff making his way to his private elevator and to his car. His driver had it pulled around, so at least that was going well tonight. Truly, Jin was almost always dependable but with a day like today it was a nice surprise.

He was in the business of business, as he liked to say. His portfolios were diversified and Park Industries had its fingers in many pies but he had started as a shipping company way back when the world still needed candles to see at night. He had a knack for it and at the time he needed something to eat up the long hours spent alone. He started as a captain and eventually one ship turned into a fleet, then into a fully fledged company. Much had changed but it was still something to distract him. He had been a vampire capable of adapting unlike so many of his day and it often gave him a competitive edge. It also made him a target, especially from those who did not take so kindly to the shifting centuries. He worked long hours and enjoyed his life to its fullest not sparing any expense on himself. Jimin was hard working, but today had been trying to say the least.

Today he had been reminded of a blunder he had made years ago by some annoying rival company. He needed access to one of their shipping ports but The Twins, the owners and the namesake of their shared company were not having any of it. They owned most of the ports that were closed to Park Industries and he had expected them to approve the request to use the ports as it would be mutually beneficial, but apparently long ago he hadn't brought them a blood sacrifice or some dumb shit like that. Who even cared anymore? The Twins had refused to modernize and resented those of their kind who had. Preferring to be kings if not gods among men rather than live amongst them, collecting power and money in a modern way.

He was tired of the hassle. Of working around ancient idiots but also of the new regulations imposed on his kind. When vampires had become public, feeding had become such an ordeal. He had considered contracting a donor privately which was legal but had the disadvantage of forming a strong blood bond. He didn’t want to know his foods’ feelings. He missed the dark, the days he could just take as he pleased but those days were long gone. The government was strict on his kind.

He supposed he could always get a rotation of donors. This was technically illegal unless you had admins to ensure they were properly taken care of. He could hire the staff but the thought made him scowl. It was no real secret what he was. The rumors were rampant and every now and then he would do something particularly aggressive to make certain they circulated, but he was careful that his undead status was on as few official documents as possible. His eyes rolled back in his head as he thought of an acquaintance of his whose easily searchable government I.D. declared him a literal monster to anyone with a smartphone. An idiot move and one he did not intend to emulate.

Jimin was a dangerous man through and through. His CEO status and ruthless business sense alone was enough to make him formidable in every sense, though the fangs and supernatural advantages certainly didn’t hurt. He rarely needs to use them these days as legal means could destroy a competitor just as brutally, though he had readily used less than legal means when he deemed it necessary, or when the threat was less than human like the aforementioned Twins and their now, shell of a company.

So now here he was, at the clinic. He got out of the car and re-buttoned his suit jacked in a one handed practiced movement. He vaguely gestures to Jin to wait for him. If it had been anyone else, they wouldn't have understood but Jin was always good at reading a situation and even better at reading people or in this case what used to be people. He nodded at Jimin and pulled off to wait. The garish neon light illuminated Jimin's face and made his scowl more intimidating as he went in. Except for another vampire, it was basically deserted. Good, he thought to himself, checking in.

As they were expecting him it was a quick process. His money and reputation got him fast service and the best donors. Clean, quiet and usually pretty. The clinic wanted to impress him. A blandly pretty nurse led him to a door. Maybe he had seen her before as she seemed to know him but he didn’t care enough to bother trying to remember. She smelled off, putting too many creams and perfumes to try and entice vampires to look her way. He was repulsed by her. He didn't even bother keeping it off his face, in a place where he didn't need to play at being human. He paid good money here to stay off the official books

“I think you’ll like this one sir, pretty and young and if you don’t mind me saying, just the right amount of nervous. Her first time.” She snickered. He frowned, not liking the nurse's tone or obvious insinuations. Despite his reputation he didn’t think of his donors as victims and didn't want them to be scared of him. He knew plenty of vamps who liked to cause donors pain but that had never been his style at least not in private. Even before the world had changed when he took blood from the unwilling, he had preferred to cause as little suffering as possible.

The nurse stopped at the door and he stared at her with disdain, clearly dismissing her. Once she scuttled away, he felt like he could breathe cleanly again, picking up on other warm bodies in the building. A scent pulled him back to the present, just on the other side of the door. It was faint but quite pleasing. He knocked. Twice. No hesitation.

“Uhm you can come in?” A nervous voice rang out from behind the door. He waited a second composing himself trying to make sure he wouldn’t scare the girl any more than she already was. Probably scared of monsters, the poor thing. Unlike the nurse, you smelled good. He could smell a tasteful amount of perfume, a soft floral smell and sweat that didn't mask the sweet smell of your blood.

You haven’t been expecting Nosferatu or anything. You had met a few beings in your life, that you were fairly confident were vampires, not that you had asked, but there were instances. This man before you certainly wasn’t what you were expecting either. He was, quite simply, beautiful. Striking features, bright eyes, a color you couldn't quite place, that looked like they were a light source on their own and intense red hair that was clearly a fashion choice. A good choice, you think to yourself. To your dismay, the person in front of you was very well dressed. Clearly this suit was not off the rack; it fit him so well and looked so good. Oh god, you could feel the blush rise in your cheeks and hoped the monitor on your finger wouldn’t register the spike in your heart beat. You suddenly wish you were in something other than your business casual work clothes. You didn't have anything that would rival his look but you couldn't help the desire to make a good impression.

He walked over and sat on the sofa, undoing the bottom button of his Jacket. He was careful to leave a lot of space between you at all times. You thought they only did that in the movies, the button thing. It was so fluid and quick. Good with his hands, you thought before you could catch yourself. Great, if you weren’t blushing then you certainly were now.

God you're pretty, he thinks. And that smell that's coming from you...You smell like a fine wine and he wants a taste the second he’s in the room. That flush of blood so close to the surface of your face is so appealing, you look positively edible. Did you know the spell you were casting over him? Your nerves but distinct lack of fear made you give a vulnerable air and he leans in just a bit, unable to help the minute shift in his posture. He chuckles and carefully gestures to you to sit with him, letting the space speak for itself. Your heartbeat spikes and he grins at the sound in his ears, revealing a hint of white fang. The sight brings you back to the reality of the situation and with a touch of hesitation, you sit next to him. You realize you are now more nervous to sit with this beautiful man than about the whole blood donor thing. Maybe, you mull over, you hadn't met a vampire before, not if they were all this hot.

He can tell how nervous you are and he is surprised by how much he doesn’t like it. You smell intoxicating and you look so helpless, nervous and trembling ever so slightly. You probably didn't even realize you were doing it, he wasn't sure a human would be able to tell. He wants you to feel safe. Safe with him. The only thing that makes sense to him would be that you are afraid of what he is, not really considering that it might be his appearance, his supernatural beauty making you behave like this.

“You seem nervous. You don’t have to do this. If you want to leave, you have that choice. I’ll walk you to the door even if you like.” He’s surprised he said it the second it slips out. He means it though, he realizes; he’d walk you right to your door if you would let him. He wants to take you right here right now, wants to feel your heart pump for him, that was true, but he also feels protective. He wants to... well he's not entirely sure what he wants from you, only that he wants you.

“No I... I want to. I mean I need to.” You are just as surprised as him by your own admission. “I’m sorry, I’m just so nervous, I've never done this before.” You blush again or maybe it just deepened, you’re unsure if the blush had ever really left your face. You do feel very warm. The whole conversation sounded like innuendo in your ears and it wasn’t helping.

“I can tell.'' He smiles and it transforms his face from beautiful to truly stunning. He looks soft almost and any threat you felt seems to have disappeared. He can hear your heart slow into a regular rhythm and the blush creep higher into your checks. Did you know what it was doing to him? He felt almost drunk being next to you. “What brings a girl like you to a place like this?” He knows he shouldn’t bother and he won’t see you again but he doesn’t want this to end. He wants more than your blood; he wants to know you, wants you to be his.

“I-uhm,” you frown suddenly. He doesn’t like it. You should be smiling, mirthful, joyful, sparkling. “Work is complicated. My manager, “at manager, your nose wrinkled in disgust. “Has taken it upon himself to cut my hours.'' Jimin frowns as well, leaning in.

“And why is that? Are you a bad worker? You seem responsible.”

“Do I?” You laugh, disbelieving. It's a wonderful sound. He idly mulls over the idea of asking you to laugh again so he can record and listen to it all the time. That was probably creepy to say so he tucks the thought away.

“It’s your shoes. Very sensible.”Your eyes flick from his face to your shoes. You had swapped to plain flats before you had walked into the clinic, heels in your bag hanging from the hook on the door a few feet away. The flats weren’t bad but you did wish you hadn't swapped now.

“No, I'm not a bad worker, I just don't think my work is what my manager wants from me. It's all I'm willing to give him though.” His frown deepens, not pleased to know this at all. Should he offer you a job? It might be strange, given the circumstances. He doesn't want to scare you away. "I don't mind the job, it keeps me here in the city. The lifestyle of the glamorous and all that. Just like I don’t mind being here.”

“If you are sure,” he can’t wait anymore now that you're relaxed, he has to have you to taste. But he decides then and there he’s going to leave you a tip. He doesn’t want you to ever come near this place again. He doesn’t want anyone else to touch you. Or to taste you. Hell, even to behold you. Hopefully it will take some of the stress off of your shoulders.

You carefully move your hair for him, leaning your head to the side, offering your neck. As pretty as he is you have to close your eyes. The actual bite is still a little much to face with your eyes open. The thought of teeth actually biting into your flesh is scary you have to admit, and you're worried it will hurt. This show of trust, intimacy, almost overwhelms you and he bites down before you have a chance to think about it too much. He’s careful to make sure he doesn’t harm you more than what is absolutely necessary. You let out a small gasp. He’s drinking faster than you thought and your vision starts to tunnel after the rush passes and you realize you are going to pass out, the feeling of the blood being pulled from you proving to be too much. You hand clutches at his jacket but you're not quick enough to pull the monitor off your finger to signal something's off.

Mine. It's all he can think as he closes his eyes for a moment, lost in the ecstasy of your blood. Your smell and taste surrounding him completely. He should slow down, savor every drop of your blood but he can't. You tasted even better then you smelled, he holds you closer to him, careful not to hurt you despite his overwhelmingly distracted state.

He opens his eyes wanting to see your face for a moment and realizes you have passed out. Panic sets in slowly. Fuck, not good. This could happen, especially to first time donors. Especially when he had been pulling out your blood so aggressively. Guilt and hunger mix in his throat. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. He forces himself to pull back from you, easily moving to the other side of the room with a single movement. Your body hits the couch, your neck still oozing blood. It’s all he can do to make himself leave the room, breathing shallowly, when he wants nothing more than to go back in and drain you dry.

He storms out with your blood still on his lips and angrily stops at the front desk. They were supposed to stop him if the donor passed out, the shared negligence almost cost you your life. They had staff on hand that could at least have broken the trance your blood had put him under! He didn't even know how long he had been drinking or how long you were unconscious, he had been so lost in your blood. Fuck, he had almost killed you. He strains his ears to hear you breathe just to make sure you were still alive.

The rude nurse who fancied herself your pimp and his dealer looked up, startled. He made a startling if not terrifying sight, blood at his mouth and eyes alight with rage. He was angry with himself, with the clinic, with whoever had fucked around with your schedule resulting in you being here in the first place. He storms to the front desk and can't help but enjoy it when she recoils back from him.

“She gets home safe and with double pay or this place burns to the ground with you inside. If I find out she goes to another one of your clinics or to any clinic you all fucking die.” Jimin’s voice is level but reveals nothing but wrathful promise. The rude nurse gulps, terror in her eyes as she manages a nod. “Bill my fucking account.” he spits out, turning on a heel to leave, resisting the urge to shatter the doors on his way out. Jin pulls the car around in seconds. That's what he liked about Jin; he paid attention, he was never playing on his phone or something nonsensical, he was always there right on time

Jin doesn’t miss the fury rolling off of his employer as he slides in to the comfortable leather seat. He cocks his head in the mirror, waiting for an explanation but Jimin doesn't even notice. Jimin is already making plans, he’s going to send someone tomorrow to make sure everything was taken care of. As much as he wants to go back in and make sure you're okay now, he doesn’t trust himself to not kill you in the process. He wipes the blood that fell from his lips and brings it back up to his tongue, tasting you again for an agonizing moment. Fuck, you tasted amazing.

“You okay, boss?”

“Yes, just...tonight was interesting.” He makes a note to have them find your number when he sends whoever he thinks to send. Probably his head of security if he wanted this done right.

You awake some time later, the nurse cleaning your neck. She looks pale and when she finishes signing you out, she presses an envelope into your hand. She tells you that you did fine but that due to your reaction you wouldn’t be invited to donate again and that clinics would be warned in the future not to expect you. Reasonably, you are confused. Why did she seem so scared? You gently touch your neck thinking about your beautiful vampire client. Glad for the wound because at least it was proof that tonight was real. You may have passed out, sure, but you could be convinced to do it again, especially for him.

When you finally count the money, the amount surprises and confuses you but the clinic insists it’s correct when you call. They tell you your client had offered you a tip. You didn't know that kind of thing happened but maybe it was just the standard thing? You frown though when the clinic insists you don't call again. You hang up your phone, still unsure but deposit the money the next day, very thankful to your mysterious beautiful patron.

[seercayder]

No but I feel as though artists are probably experiencing one of the most hostile years of posting art online that they’ve ever experienced for maybe forever. And I mean this for both amateur artists and professionals (with maybe a lil bit of bias since I also do The Art).

Tumblr’s nudity ban has crippled any piece that is either NSFW or uses nudity as artistic expression and it ultimately drove away both the artists themselves and a lot of their fans, which destroyed any remaining traction for the artists who managed to remain. Tumblr is no longer an artistic freedom-friendly site and it shows, which is a fucking shame bc they genuinely have one of the better tagging systems than other sites and I believe that most feedback on art there has been positive and friendly, which has now gone the way of the dinosaur much like Deviantart.

Twitter has problems with image compression but their biggest issue is toxic abuse, which I find to be the most damaging to artists out of all the other problems i’m listing here. Both the lure of anonymity and the mindset that ‘Speak Loud In Little Words To Make Point Means You Are Important And Right’ has fuelled the absolutely vile comments I have seen directed at artists on the site. Although it’s mainly aimed at fanartists and ship artists, I have noticed unwanted (even rude) criticism on immaculate, well-done art pieces, which is extremely belittling and insulting because the artist (although they may be open to criticism) if they haven’t asked for criticism then that means that they are not in the right mindset to receive any, and therefore it is not your place to throw disparaging comments at them.

But the biggest issue with abuse on Twitter is obviously aimed at fan-artists, especially those those that draw NSFW or “problematic” content. I could go into a whole spiel about how a drawing of a fictional character doesn’t affect reality but in short: If you find disturbing art of a non-existent character (or hey, even non-disturbing art, it’s just something you don’t like) then ignore it. Don’t go and fucking bully the artist you psychopath. If it is truly illegal then report the piece and then see if it gets taken down. Because 90% of the time it won’t be taken down because it doesn’t go against guidelines and you’re just trying to police the site like you’re the thought-police, monitoring other peoples art as if you have the god-given right to. And if you’re a minor stay the fuck out of 18+ accounts. Don’t comment, don’t follow, don’t even look. I am absolutely amazed by the mindset that some children have to waltz into a space not made for them and having the balls to insult the 18+ artist, who have specifically said “no minors”, for posting icky content. It gets even worse when you see how they abuse the Privatter or Curiouscat links the Twitter artists provide, made for anonymous feedback or for being the final barrier for an adult piece that says “hey this stuff is NSFW, don’t click if you are underage, last warning”. I’m gonna go into this more when I cover TikTok in the next few paragraphs. But ultimately, the artists on that site are having to be constantly vigilant against abuse, and it’s not unusual for them having to spend hours going through their 1K+ followers and having to block every underage follower who just didn’t fucking listen to their warnings. Imagine how exhausting and irritating and down-right uncomfortable that must be; having to monitor every fan that sees your work out of fear that they’re a minor seeing adult content or that they could throw abusive comments at you. Horrible.

Instagram is saturated with bots attempting to steal your work or advertise it on their own page and feedback isn’t really a ‘thing’ on there. Also, their algorithm (which may have also been implemented on Twitter, I believe that the Twitter algorithm now avoids promoting popular artist terms, but I can’t be certain bc the Twitter post that pointed this out is long-lost in the depths of my timeline, bc again, no tagging system) is based more around sharing than likes, which can be a huge barrier to artists. Sure, you may like someones art and even leave a nice comment on it, but do you really want to share every piece you come across, especially if it’s not something you would show dear Aunty Susan who follows you? It’s infuriating that a whole site dedicated for images is so difficult to use for artists, and with Instagram implementing features that are similar to Snapchats ‘stories’ it’s clear they’ve moving in a different direction, focusing on momentary attention-grabbing photos. This is simply because Instagram is advertising itself as more of a promotional influencer site nowadays, and anything that could sully their reputation has to be thrown into the algorithm trash. NSFW art or just plain ‘bad’ art? Trash. If you’re not gonna make money for them then why should they bother? You wanna promote your art? Pay for it because the algorithm will absolutely be working against you.

Now, the biggest fucking offender for worst art-sharing site of the year is TikTok (no surprise there), which is absolutely rampant with reposts and uncredited artwork and a gateway for abusive comments against artists. Like the Ouroboros snake, it goes through the same pattern every time; People (usually minors) find art on Twitter or Pinterest and repost it, usually without credit or going against the artist’s wishes about reposting. Then it either goes two-ways: Firstly, if the piece is SFW it will get about five-seconds of interest, a like for the reposter and people will then just move on. TikTok is built entirely around short bursts of satisfaction, feeding a a constant loop of serotonin for a few seconds before you move on. So ultimately, people rarely then hunt down the original artist, especially if their credit isn’t readily available, and usually the original artists doesn’t see any rise in likes, followers or popularity and are usually unaware that their art is even getting any attention on TikTok.

Or, if the art is NSFW, it can go down the second way. It is reposted and, as the majority of TikTok users are under-18, many users find the image uncomfortable, especially if it is a bit more ‘out-there’ or of a ship they don’t like. The reposters sometimes find the image off of Privatter, which is even worse since the piece has been posted to Privatter not just as a final barrier against minors, but also as a form of directing the piece to a specific and niche audience due to it’s... spicer than usual NSFW content. I’m talking really specific pieces with really specific kinks. Now that piece is floating around TikTok, widely seen by the general fans of a fandom, who again, are usually underage. The viewers grow uncomfortable, as the piece is not made for them, especially since sometimes the reposter only posted the piece for shock-value, and would even encourage insulting comments by only posting the credits for the purpose of getting fans to throw abuse at the artist (”The artist is ***** but they ship **** and are icky”) and so the viewers finally decide to make the effort to hunt down the original artist, only to throw insulting and bullying comments at them, made worse by the fact that they are children who don’t have the sense to hold back and have been fuelling their mindset in the echo-chamber that is TikTok.

And as a result of a lot of this hostile feedback for artists, it is becoming increasingly difficult to find a space for amateur artists who are just starting out, since the art community is becoming a little bit scary. I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say that new (or not even new but recently promoted) sites such as Artstation are becoming a better place for professional artists only, but it is very intimidating for learner artists. That’s not necessarily a bad thing - I believe that part of the reason for Deviantarts decline was that the tagging system was horrible, so good art was being drowned out by amateur, fetish content, so more advanced artists were distancing themselves from the site, especially if they were trying to build a portfolio for employment. I also find that fanart usually gets far more likes than more original art pieces, even if the original piece is amazingly good, which isn’t a criticism against fanart but posting your original piece on a site more aimed at professional pieces may help you reach your target audience better and improve likes and interaction. However, that does mean that if you are an amateur, or hell, just an average artists who is still learning, your best bet for exposure is posting your piece across multiple sites and very, very regularly, braving any abusive comments if you try anything slightly “spicy”. Which, obviously, become a very potentially toxic atmosphere and it’s not uncommon for artists to feel burn-out or depressed at their lack of attention or the cyber-bullying they may receive.

I’m not trying to say that posting artwork has always been easy, but there is definitely a more aggressive culture surrounding it and I think artists have to be aware that chances are they will face insulting comments, reposters, frustrating algorithms, cyber-bullying, a lack of interaction and burn-out as they try and appeal to websites that would do the bare minimum for you in terms of promotion.

This isn’t meant to be a post to scare away artists, I just wanted to point out that there is a big fucking problem and it feels as though it’s getting worse. Nowadays, websites have become a bit too comfortable targeting creators rather than fans when it comes to monitoring content and artists have been put under more and more pressure as they face more and more abuse that is rarely addressed, especially by the sites themselves that host the content. Things that are a huge punch in the face for artists, such as NFT’s, are becoming more normalised and it’s honestly just sad.

[spaceschool]

🎄That’s right! It’s time to start getting ready for Space School’s 7th annual 12 DAYS OF GUESTMAS! 🎄

It’s that time of year again! Time to start getting ready for this year’s Spacemas!

BASIC INFO:

I need to fill about 10 guest comic slots.

Comics should be at least 1 single page. (Max 4 pages)

Comics should be in full color.

Comics need to be X-mas/Winter themed!

I also accept illustrations, but they must have a clear narrative or dialogue!

Tone can be humorous, serious, anything like that. As long as it’s Space School and X-mas/Winter themed all at once.

DEADLINE IS DECEMBER 13TH FOR ALL FINISHED ART!

HOW TO APPLY:

DON’T send me any completed art, instead just send your idea/pitch for what you’d like to do for said comic.

Link or attach example of your art or portfolio!

Send all of this to my e-mail colinxzain@hotmail.com

Label e-mail “Space School Guest Comic Pitch”

And  that’s about it! It’s pretty flexible and this is all in good fun! I  would be honored if some of you applied to make a guest comic this year!(If you applied last year, feel free to apply again this year if you’re feeling up to it. I loved all the artists I worked with last year and would love to work with ya’ll again.)

This full post on Tumblr has more info about Space School and Christmas/Guestmas in general in case you're curious!

Below is more info about Guestmas and Christmas time in Space School:

Space School Christmas Illustrations by year:

2011

2012

2013

2014

2015

2016 (PART 2)

2017

2018

2019

Original 12 Days of Spacemas announcement image

12 DAYS OF GUESTMAS 2014

12 DAYS OF GUESTMAS 2015

12 DAYS OF GUESTMAS 2016

12 DAYS OF GUESTMAS 2017

12 DAYS OF GUESTMAS 2018

12 DAYS OF GUESTMAS 2019

I would love to see some of these past outfits re-created in any comics but new ones or just general winter themed outfits are fine too. Zeggy should most always be Santa though, unless joke calls for otherwise. BUT! Jokes trump everything– if it’s funny, I want it.

SPACE SCHOOL AND THE HOLIDAYS:

Because Winter-time has always been a time of hoilday-stuffs for lots of places and planets (especially those who were colonized by Earth or Nubia) Space School most often gives the whole school lots of time off in December from school-life.

All holidays are accepted to celebrated within the walls as long as everyone is being respectful of each other– as with most things in Space School. The School decorates mostly with lights and tries to stay away from leaning one way or the other. Students are allowed to decorate inside their dorms as they please, obviously.

Most students leave home to their respective planets for the holidays but some students and teachers stay at the school thru the whole month– sometimes celebrating together!

It’s an exciting and peaceful time for everyone~

Alkaline, Zeggy, and Toggy usually go home for the holidays (sometimes together) and Joe stays at the school. Sometimes Joe joins Toggy, Terrago, and Omnivera at their homes.

Dude, Maleena, and Vava either see their separate families alone or all stay together in their home near the school.

Dennis and Booker spend the holiday cooped up alone at Booker’s apartment avoiding everyone but each other.

ZEGGY AND HIS PLANET’S CULTURE:

Zeggy is canonically the most all about Christmas out of the whole group.

X-mas was an adopted holiday by Ollce when Earth colonized the planet and as such, it resembles Christmas as we known it with some key differences.

As far as the tree goes, it starts out as a sculpted pile of dirt resembling a tree or other X-mas object that is watered thru the month with various glowing mushrooms and other fun alien-glowy-bits appearing as it’s watered– so by the time Christmas rolls around the tree will have grown it’s own ornaments to light up the room!

You buy bags of seed/spores each year for the tree, these bags make great gifts and are often put in stockings!!!

Otherwise, a lot of the traditions are the same with either having different looking aesthetics. They do stockings, presents under the tree, and Santa– who instead of having a sleigh– instead rides a single giant mole (which is a creature from purple planet, I can provide reference for) and is of course, purple himself. He rides this mole– who is named Rudolf, around all the underground cities of Ollce delivering presents to all the kids.

Zeggy gets into the holiday spirit way too early and way too fast. He decorates his whole dorm room as well as wearing as much X-mas accessories as he’s allowed over his school uniform.

He’s the type of person to put everything non-Christmas away and replace it with Christmas themed things.

He absolutely spoils Alkaline with tons and tons and way too many gifts– all of which are extremely personalized.

Otherwise, he only buys presents for his parents/grandparents, Joe, Toggy, and gives cards to his teachers. Most of his efforts go towards Alkaline.

He eats a billion food, sings a billion songs, and is fucking obnoxious. It’s beautiful.

ALKALINE AND HIS TRADITIONS:

Alkaline likes Christmas just as much as everyone else and is definitely not as hype as Zeggy because who could match Zeggy’s energy, honestly. But, he definitely gets into the spirits! Enjoys the food, drink, songs, presents– etc.

Christmas on Earth is very similar to what we think of it now which some differences– many of which haven’t totally been decided upon so feel free to have some fun interpretations.

Christmas has most definitely become a non-religious holiday in most all senses on Earth. It’s more just about the aesthetics and being with family members, buying fits, eating food, etc.

Alkaline is either with Zeggy in his home on Ollce or has Zeggy over on Earth. He stays with his Mom and Sister, visiting extended family on Christmas Day for dinner.

Alkaline buys everyone he knows presents– even if it’s just something small!

I usually draw Alkaline as a reindeer because Alkaline with antlers is super cute.

JOE’S ‘CHRISTMAS’:

Christmas isn’t celebrated where Joe is from– they have other traditions. However; Christmas Day is actually Joe’s birthday– which he usually chooses to spend alone or with Dennis or Lorna (his girlfriend)– depending on the age.

As such, Joe doesn’t care too much about Christmas and see’s it more of just as “his birthday” but starts to appreciate the holiday more when Zeggy’s festive spirit invades him. And, he likes the presents.

I’m sure Zeggy and Joe have some special X-mas moments together with Zeggy trying to show Joe all about “The Christmas Spirit”!

TOGGY’S TRADITIONS:

On Nubia, they don’t really have a Christmas but rather a big celebration of a New Year like holiday where they begin the new calendar year.  Like Christmas, it’s a time to celebrate with family and loved ones.  

Typically people travel long distances to spend the two days reunited with family, and everything shuts down.  The most important part of the festivities is to tell stories about the year–letting out stress or frustration while also reliving good moments and bonding with family members.  

This is always accompanied by large amounts of alcoholic beverages, which are enjoyed by all ages.  

Oftentimes everyone gets really smashed the first day and then sleeps it off the next.   Food varies from region to region but typically includes mostly unprocessed foods such as berries and vegetables, or dried lizard or fish jerky. As the festivities mark the beginning of the new year, many Nubians will dye their hair to a different color or get a new piercing around this time. Presents aren’t really a thing on Nubia, though it is common for parents and grandparents to give their children small sums of money to encourage them to have new adventures in the new year.  

Toggy’s family is a bit more accustomed to Earth traditions though, and so he tries to buy his close friends gifts for “Christ-mass” but they are always strange and often food.

DUDE, MALEENA, VAVA:

The 3’s traditions are similar to Alkaline’s since they’re all from Earth– so not much to say there.

Dude spends a lot of time in an apron baking cookies, cakes, etc as presents for everyone he knows and Vava and Maleena definitely gain some weight this time of year.

They all get drunk a lot and laugh a lot and just have a good time together BEING A LIL FAMILY.

Dude always makes sure to exchange presents with students he’s helped thru the year; since he often takes troubled students under his wing.

DENNIS AND BOOKER:

Booker nicely decorates his apartment and spends a lot of time with Dennis on the couch eating food and talking. They frick a lot too.

It’s chill.

OMNIVERA AND TERRAGO:

As the resident “gays into roleplays”, Omnivera and Terrago do a lot of dressing up for X-mas.

There’s a lot of time Terrago will be with Toggy’s family with them– and so I’m sure Omnivera is there sometimes as well. In a billion, expensive outfits.

The two of them absolutely spoil each other and nobody else in presents– except for Toggy who they buy something for– OF COURSE.

NOTE ABOUT REX: Due to some wild stuff happening with the creator of Rex, Rex will no longer be appearing in Space School and therefore should not be appearing in any Guest Comics! Sorry!

AND PLEASE, FEEL FREE TO ADD NEW HEAD-CANONS OR INTERPRETATIONS FOR FUTURE HOLIDAYS!! REALLY, THIS STUFF IS JUST HERE TO GET YOU STARTED SO GO HAVE LOTS AND LOTS OF FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[rokutouxei]

the wonder that’s keeping the starts apart

ikemen vampire: temptation through the dark theo van gogh / mc | T | [ ao3 link in bio ]

The challenge seemed pretty simple: to try to befriend the university bookshop's most sour employee, Theo van Gogh. As a literature major with a boatload of book recommendations on her back, it ought to be a simple task indeed. But as she uncovers what lies between Theo's pages, the more she finds it harder to become closer to him without having to put the feeling directly into words. What can she learn from Theo about what it means to stay—and how can she teach Theo about what it means to let go? | written for ikevamp big bang 2020!

[ masterpost for all chapters ]

CHAPTER 4 OF 22

She is… persistent.

The kind of persistent that would be inspiring if the persistence wasn’t pointed in his direction. Theo isn’t anti-social—he’s not the kind of person who would purposefully avoid conversation or hide from people, because he knows that, especially with his major, building networks is a thing. 

But she’s different, because it’s not like she’s doing it for any sort of plus or gain on her end—at least in Theo’s mind—so he doesn’t quite understand why she’s like this.

“Do you have a favorite book?”

“What’s your favorite food?”

“Why’d you decide to work at Dragon’s Hoard?”

“What’s it like being a business major?”

She asks just a handful of questions in a day, as if not to scare him off. But she makes the most out of his patience. She sits there, the book he’s lent her in her hand, a finger stuck between the pages to mark where she was last at. She gives an answer for every question she gives, as

“Me? Man, I wouldn’t be able to pick a favorite book…”

“I really like Japanese food, actually, but…”

“Hmm, I’m thinking of getting a part-time too, so…”

“It’s prettier on paper. Everything is prettier on paper in the lit department…”

Something about her persistence reminds him of Vincent, in a mirrored way that he can’t quite put into words. She and Vincent both have something thrumming in their veins that pushes them forward. It’s something he doesn’t understand, because it’s never been like that for him.

So one day, he finally asks:

“Why me?”

“What?”

Theo asks it out of nowhere, and she looks up at him curiously from between the pages of Ocean Vuong.

“What do you mean, why you?”

“It is what it is.”

“Okay, mister vague-posting,” she rolls her eyes at him, but there’s a smile on her face. “I don’t know, really. You’re interesting, I guess.”

It’s not the eloquent answer he expected out of her, but he’s a little relieved it’s not anything more complex. He doesn’t know what he would done with that sort of information. “Glad to have been entertaining, then.”

 “What do you think of yourself, a shiny thing?” she says, laughing. “You’re just more than you show yourself to be, and that’s the fun part. I just might see through you, Theo.”

“You do not.”

“I do! You’re all barbs but Vincent calls you the sweetest thing and that’s all I need to know. Maybe I can even guess your favorite color.”

“That’s irrelevant.”

“Is it yellow?”

Theo didn’t have a favorite color. And even if he did, yellow might not be that high up on the list of contenders. But in that moment, he considers it: yellow, the color of Vincent’s hair, yellow, the rye fields of their home town, yellow, the color of childhood summers and painting in the backyard, yellow, the colors on their bedroom wall.

Maybe this silly girl was right. Maybe yellow could be his favorite.

“Lucky guess, hondje,” he says, instead, watching the sun blossom, bright yellow, on her face.

--

“You’re trying to justify a friendship with a guy who called you a dog?” he asks, tucking beautifully-tinted violet hair behind his ear. “You deserve better, Toshiko-san.”

It’s late afternoon, and she’s sitting in the gazebo near the Arts Building, the small, undignified hangout spot of the school’s already tiny literary club. Her friend and senior, Dazai, sits across from her on the table with his glasses on, squinting at her in confusion.

Dazai graduated a bit back, being two years older than her, but he’s still studying under the department.  For some reason or another that she could not comprehend, he decided to take his MA in Japanese Literature here as well. One shared intensive writing workshop class with him has made them good friends.

“Called? No, present tense. He calls me a dog,” she corrects, shaking her head as she finally lifts her head up from the book she is highlighting. “I mean, he uses my name… sometimes… rarely… okay nearly never, but somehow he’s figured out calling me his puppy in Dutch is a good nickname.”

Dazai shakes his head. “Sounds like a fuckboy,” he comments, readjusting his glasses into place, as he flips his readings back to the right page. “Steer clear unless he has a huge cock, I guess?”

“Shut up, oh my god!” she exclaims, rushing over to cover his mouth with her hands. “No way, no way. He’s a business major, and I don’t want to be in a relationship with a business major of all things. Besides, there’s a better option than him in the same house. Does arts too.”

“Oh? Pray tell, who might it be?”

“His brother,” she whispers, conspiratorially, “is Vincent.”

Dazai blinks. There is a moment of silence before he can compose himself. “No way. Van Gogh? He has a brother? He’s still here?”

“Yes, him, the ‘genius of the College of Arts’, he ‘who haunts the hallways of the Fine Arts Department’, the professors’ favorite ‘artistic genius’,” she rattles off, having memorized the rumors with how many times she’s heard it. “The only reason I know he’s still here is because it would have been huge news if he actually graduated.”

“Seven years in the shitty College of Arts? He’s some sort of masochist for sure,” he comments. She poses no comment to the fact that Dazai took his undergraduate studies here, too, and now he’s also doing his masters… here, too. “But you’re telling me the guy at Dragon’s Hoard is his brother? His brother is a business major?”

“Look, I know, I was surprised too,” she says. “I was already shocked enough that he was the friendly barista at the café when you told me… but to know they’re related? They’re like ice and fire.”

“Exact opposites, huh?”

“Either way, that’s the story of how I got into some sort of mini modeling gig and into a friendship that I did not expect or want,” she says, finally finishing her story, with a wave of her hand like a conductor at the end of a piece.. “I’m trying to make the most out of it, though.”

Dazai nods, but his face is full of disbelief. “Yes, by sticking around a guy who calls you a dog in his free time.”

“No nickname will stand between me and getting people to read some good old poetry.”

“That’s not the point, Toshiko-san, but if that’s what makes you happy.”

For a moment, the two of them return to their studies. She, turning back to the book she’s highlighting and annotating for a class tomorrow. Him, going back to his readings for tonight’s class. The College of Arts’ literary club used to be open to everyone, but after dwindling membership, it became one that was limited to the Department of Literature’s students—or, rather, all of the students are immediately made part of it, and could hang out at their said sad, lonely gazebo if they want. That didn’t make it any more popular, though, so she’s made it her and her friend’s little nook for studying when she’s not in the library.

“Say, what made Vincent a legend in the College of Arts?” she suddenly asks, just as she reached the end of a page. Dazai hums, finishing a passage he’s reading before looking up.

“Isn’t it because of his style?” Dazai answers, though hesitantly. “I’m sure the painting hanging in the Dean’s room is his.”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure of that too, but…” she pauses, thinking of Vincent in his studio room, planning his paintings, the corkboard, and the canvases. “Why didn’t he just…get it over with? Why hasn’t he graduated? I’m sure there’s some sort of—apprenticeship or studio that’ll take someone like him when he paints like that. Maybe they’ll give him an allowance too. And with the number of recommendations that he can get from the professors?”

With a hum, Dazai offers: “Maybe you can ask his brother.”

They make a face at each other, laugh, and get back to studying.

--

Dazai’s class starts at five in the afternoon, running up until seven p.m., and while there are days that she waits out for him at the gazebo for dinner, tonight was a special day. The Office of Student Relations has meetings on Tuesday mornings; and while they do post their announcements online the next day, the fastest way to get the news from them is to check the bulletin board outside their office at six p.m., which is when they post. Sitting on a bench right outside the office, she waits for the assistant or secretary to post what she’s waiting for and—

There he is!

“Hello,” she greets, standing up from her seat and walking toward the bulletin board. The secretary smiles and greets her back, tacking the notice to the board.

“Waiting on the requirements?”

“Sure am,” she answers, wringing her hands behind her. “Been very anxious.”

“Well, here they are. Best of luck.”

“Thank you!”

The secretary takes his leave shortly after that, returning back through the large wooden doors of the antiquated office. She left behind, stands in front of the bulletin board with her eyes closed, and takes a deep breath.

This is it. The requirements for her dreams, right in front of her.

She opens her eyes and takes out a flyer from the small pocket that the secretary had pinned onto the board. A flyer detailing the requirements for the one-year, international scholarship program of the Office of Student Relations.

A long, laundry-list of requirements, from filling in forms, requesting official paperwork like transcripts and recommendation letters, submitting portfolios, and passing a certain number of assessment interviews.

“I can’t afford to get distracted,” she says, to no one in particular, as if saying it out loud will make it real, will help it come true much easier than it actually will take. This is what he was all supposed to be—a small, pleasant motivation, a distraction for when idle, but not one that will stop her from what she originally intended to do.

This.

To go away.

But…

She tucks the flyer in between notebooks, thinking quietly to herself, But those are only books, so it can’t be that bad—can it?

[revenantwinery]

For the sake of Art

This article came about because of a discussion between two longtime friends who have happened to have built their careers in the wine industry.  Each of us reside on opposite sides of the country but speak frequently about all things wine, food and sports.

Earlier in the week during a phone conversation with my good friend Tim, who resides in The Garden State  (New Jersey), I made a comment about a piece of art his eldest daughter Ashly had just completed and shared on Instagram @ashmyersdesigns.  It was a portrait using spray paint on an 8’ by 8’canvas. The subject of the painting, Gary Vaynerchuk, of The Wine Library, a prominent retail wine shop in New Jersey.  Gary used to host a series of video posts where he reviewed wines and sometimes interviewed winemakers as they made their way up and down the east coast on sales trips. The posts originated on Gary’s Wine Library TV platform.  There is no argument in the fact that Gary garnered a cult-like following on the internet, while creating his own viniculture vocabulary.  Let us not forget his contorted facial expressions while growling “the oak monster” or commencing a tasting with the words, “it’s time for a little sniffy-sniff.”  Was it all part of his shtick?  Undoubtedly it was but objectively I offer these observations, Gary “Vee” made it fun, he made it informative, albeit based on his opinions. Gary also spoke in an unpretentious and unceremonious bit of banter to anyone who appreciates wine and is willing to spend 15-30 minutes online watching his latest episode.

My colleagues, many of whom are national or regional winery sales managers along with state wide distributor representatives, eagerly awaited the Wine Library TV link featuring the latest installment to arrive in their inboxes.  They sat in horror as Gary made negative comments or throws of elation when the scores matched the accolades given to a particular wine in their portfolios. Such is the fault with selling a bottle of wine based on the 100 point rating system.

As I spin through this yarn there are a few disclaimers to put out there.  It is not my intent in this post to offer any personal opinions or criticisms about the wines or wineries presented in the two video clips.  Now to be transparent, I have never sold wine nor interacted with Gary Vaynerchuk or the Wine Library in a professional setting.  My good friend Tim does in fact sell wine to the Wine Library on an ongoing basis.  His daughter Ashly “The Artist” does not know Gary Vaynerchuk personally but is simply inspired by his positive attitudes and does follow him on twitter.

What started as an acknowledgement of a talented young artist painting led me to reexamine a wine critics videos from 2006 & 2008.  I then compared those same wines using their current vintages, prices and scores supplied by an independent retailer on the opposite coast as a way to illustrate the changes in the Napa Valley wine industry over the last twelve or so  vintages.  But to further entice the reader I felt the story would have been incomplete had this piece not contained the data supporting those changes.

Embedded in this post are two old Wine Library TV videos that I suggest you view so as to better digest the points being presented.  The first is from 2006 and the second released in 2008. The subject of the 2006 video is the tasting of Napa Valley Cult Cabernet Sauvignon.  

The wines with the vintage and retail prices per bottle are as follows.  I have chosen not divulge the outcome of these tastings so you will have to view the videos for yourself and discover the outcome.

Wine Library TV video links

Napa Valley Cult Cabernet Sauvignon

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tdGQURCdnaE&feature=youtu.be

Napa Valley Cabernet (Tasted Blind)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tdGQURCdnaE&feature=youtu.be

Video One… 2006 – Napa Valley Cult Cabernet Sauvignon

2003 Opus One $125.00

2003 Insignia, J. Phelps $110.00

2003 Cabernet Sauvignon “Reserve”, R. Mondavi $88.00

2004 Cabernet Sauvignon “Special Select”, Caymus $120.00

Video Two…2008 – Napa Valley Cabernet Sauvignon’s Retail Price $30.00 - $60.00 per bottle (Tasted Blind)

2005 Beringer, $30.00

2005 Barnett Vineyards, $52.00

2004 Stelzner “Reserve”, $54.00

2005 Newton “Unfiltered”, $40.00

2005 Cliff Lede, $45.00

As the Wine Library is an east coast retail wine shop with great national exposure I have decided to compare what these wines look like in today’s retail environment by enlisting the help of my friends at the San Francisco Wine Panel, which is the wine tasting group for The Napa Valley Winery Exchange. They are one of the premier west coast based retailers with both national and international customers and exposure.  I chose not to include Stelzner in this updated comparison as the label still exists but is under new ownership and the original vineyard has been sold to another prominent Napa Valley producer. There are a couple of wines that did not meet the criteria of NVWE and have been omitted altogether.  When a San Francisco Wine Panel review was not available a Wine Spectator review was substituted and noted.

The Wine Library TV reviews and prices are documented in the two videos but I have chosen to enlist the San Francisco Tasting Panels extensive tasting notes and today’s current retail pricing to illustrate and compare how the Napa Valley wine industry has developed over the last 12+ years. In addition there will be a chart depicting the rising cost of grapes by utilizing past and current harvest data from the California Department of Food and Agriculture’s Annual Grape Crush Reports for District 4 to substantiate the numbers.

Present Day Update on Napa Valley Cult Cabernet Sauvignon – Video One from 2006

San Francisco Wine Panel - 98 Points                     Retail: $383.00       2017 Opus One Proprietary Red Wine Oakville Napa Valley                  This year’s Opus is at once notably creamy and fruit-rich to the nose, where blueberry, dark plum sauce, mulberry, black currant, fig, sweet tobacco, vanilla, clove, cedar and hints of dry dark rose and laurel all fan-out. The impression of creamy-edged ripeness is mirrored on the palate, where the polished tannins are almost entirely submerged by a wave sweet vanilla, toffee, clove, mace, tobacco and peppercorn that support juicier flavors of blueberry, mulberry and plum. The finish is plush and full and beautifully food-balanced. Everything is deliciously satisfying now, but those with patience can expect four or five years of steady evolution. A blend of 81% Cabernet Sauvignon, 8.5% Petite Verdot, 5% Cabernet Franc, 4.5% Merlot & 1% Malbec. - DG

San Francisco Wine Panel - 99 Points                     Retail: $169.00       2016 Robert Mondavi Cabernet Sauvignon “Reserve” To Kalon Vineyard, Oakville Napa Valley                                                                       In really great years Mondavi almost always makes great Cabernet and 2016 is one of their classic vintages. The aromas are a dense, tightly focused melange of Cassis, black raspberry, sour red cherry, pomegranate syrup, crushed dark rose, dried herb, tobacco, leather, cedar and mace scents poised above a drying mineral undercurrent. Despite all its savory counterpoints the wine remains fruit-centric on the palate, where substantial yet highly polished tannins bring a chiseled raciness to the mouth-feel. The finish is extremely long, fruit dominant and never less than satisfying. Truly dinner-worthy now, it will reward at least six year years of cellaring and should prove long-lived. - DG

Wine Spectator - 91 Points                                         Retail:$274.95       2015 Insignia, J. Phelps Red Wine Napa Valley                                        This red offers lots of spice, cedar, gravel and lead pencil flavors, with a woodiness overshadowing the trim fruit.  A Bordeaux style version that begs for cellaring. - JL

Wine Spectator - 95 Points                                          Retail: $180.00     2015 Caymus Cabernet Sauvignon Special Selection Napa Valley              This delivers unbridled plum sauce, blackberry preserve and melted licorice flavors, but keeps a smoldering edge for form while picking up alluring black tea and incense notes on the broad finish. There’s a long echo of chocolate adding to this hedonist’s delight. – JL

Present Day Update on Napa Valley Cabernet Sauvignon (Tasted Blind) – Video Two from 2008

San Francisco Wine Panel - 95 Points                     Retail: $85.00         2017 Cliff Lede Cabernet Sauvignon, Stags Leap District Napa Valley      If still a bit youthfully reserved, this Cabernet shows its class in the focused array of blackberry, Cassis, licorice root, cocoa nib, vanilla, mace, cedar and clove scents that the nose gradually unveils. Tannins and fruit zest tighten the mouth-feel at opening, yet once again airing reveals the wine’s energy, depth and length. If certainly closer to maturity in three years or so, it wants service with fatty meats to show its best at this stage. - DG

Wine Spectator – 90 Points                                         Retail: $59.002017 Newton Cabernet Sauvignon, Unfiltered Napa Valley                         Solidly built, featuring a core of plum and blackberry notes, threaded with mesquite, mineral and savory hints.  The finish shows a twinge of the rustic tannins that mark many 2017’s, but ample fruit keeps them well absorbed. – JM

Wine Spectator – 91 Points                                         Retail: $95.002016 Barnett Cabernet Sauvignon Napa Valley MMV                                      This mixes bright cherry and plum fruit with dark black currant and licorice snap notes.  A briary spine adds energy, while the frame of roasted apple wood slowly melds on the finish. - JM

Questioning the escalating cost of your favorite Cabernet Sauvignon? This graph illustrates the rising price of Napa Valley’s dominant red varietal.

6 Year Average Price per Ton for Napa Valley Cabernet Sauvignon

At the time of this writing only the preliminary numbers from the 2020 Napa Valley harvest are available but I have one more observation to leave you with and that being a list showing the highest dollar amount paid for a ton of Cabernet Sauvignon grapes with coinciding vintage.  Preliminary reports show that Napa Valley grape crush for Cabernet Sauvignon was down 43% for 2020. 

2020 – A total of 17.8 tons were purchased at $65,919.21 per ton.

2019 – A total of 20 tons were purchased at $50,000.00 per ton.

2018 – A total of 18 tons were purchased at $50.000.00 per ton

Despite wild fires of 2020 raging through the valley creating hardships for owners of vineyards and wineries, winemakers, cellar hands and picking crews alike there was still over 120 tons of Cabernet Sauvignon picked priced at or over $30,000.00 per ton. Perhaps this might be better served in another discussion.

The expression of art can be created in different forms, with paint on canvas being the obvious or in the vineyard and then the cellar where the crafting of wine is refined while both should be admired and enjoyed.

Anthony Knox

Revenant Winery

Publié (Blog): @revenantwinery

Instagram: @revenantwinery

Twitter: @RevenantWinery

[omc-juniperpublishers]

Quality by Design in Enzyme Catalyzed Reactions-JuniperPublishers

Journal of Chemistry-JuniperPublishers

                                Abstract

Quality by Design is the new-age path chosen towards achieving the demanding quality standards in pharmaceutical industry. The present paper aims to throw light on Pharmaceutical Quality byDesign (QbD) and how its implementation will help manufacture better quality of Pharmaceuticals. Quality by Design is introduced along with its key elements to help make the understanding process easier. To attain built-in quality is the primary objective of Quality by Design. Finally, it can be said that the quality that is achieved by end product testing is not something that can be guaranteed unlike the quality assurance that can be provided by Quality by Design.

Keywords: Quality by Design (QbD); Quality Target Product Profile; Design Space; Critical Quality Attributes

Go to

Introduction

“Quality Can Be Planned.”-Joseph Juran

The above quote is self-explanatory when it comes to product quality in the pharmaceutical manufacturing industry. Quality by design (QbD) is not very old but a recent inclusion in the pharmaceutical industry. It`s sole objective is to achieve better quality standards that is especially important in the pharmaceutical industry. The QbD approach consists of various components, important ones being risk assessment, assessment and management of the identified risks, design of experiments (DoE), quality target product profile (QTPP), and establishing a control strategy to keep the product within the design space that was created with the QbD study [1]. Out of all the components, a lot of pharmaceutical development studies have incorporated DoE for a more rational approach [2].

The target of analytical QbD approach is to establish a design space (DS) of critical process parameters (CPPs) where the critical quality attributes (CQAs) of the method have been assured to fulfil the desired requirements with a selected probability [3-4].

The principles that are involved in the pharmaceutical development and are relevant to QbD are all described in the ICH guidelines (ICHQ8-11) [5].

Any Pharmaceutical Development Process Typically Covers the Following Sections:

a) Complete portfolio including all the details as well as analysis of the Reference Listed Drug Product

b) Quality Target Product Profile (QTTP) compilation.

c) Figuring out the Critical Quality Attributes (CQA)

d) Complete characterization of API &CMA (Components of Drug product) identification of the API

e) Excipient selection& excipients CMA identification

f) Formulation Development

g) Manufacturing Process Development [6]

Quality Target Product Profile (QTPP) describes the design criteria for the product, and should therefore form the basis for development of the CQAs, CPPs, and control strategy.

Critical Quality Attributes (CQA) – A physical, chemical, biological, or microbiological property or characteristic that should be within an appropriate limit, range, or distribution to ensure the desired product quality (ICH Q8) Critical Process Parameter (CPP) – A process parameter whose variability has an impact on a CQA and therefore should be monitored or controlled to ensure the process produces the desired quality. (ICH Q8) Critical Process Parameters (CPP) identification and their impact analysis is done by conducting a preliminary risk analysis for every process parameter (PP) that is involved in the individual unit operations.

Need for QbD in Pharmaceutical Industry [7,8]:

a) To integratepatient needs, quality requirements and scientific knowledge all in one design while the pharmaceutical product is still under developmentand further extending to the manufacturing process.

b) To have a better understanding about the impact of raw materials and process parameters on the quality of the final product. This is especially important for biopharmaceutical products since raw materials like cell culture media can be the risk for variability, effecting important factors likecellular viability, cell growth and specific productivity.

c) To collaborate closely with rest of the industries and the regulators and successfully keep up with the regulatory reviews

d) To maintain harmonization in all the regions so that a single CMC submission worldwide is all that is needed.

e) To encourage continuous quality improvement for the benefit of patients.

f) To enable better product design that will have less problems while manufacturing, thus facilitating more efficiency in the manufacturing process.

g) To make post-approval changes easier since it will be contained within a pre-defined design space, thus resulting in regulatory flexibility.

Every production process in a pharmaceutical industry to implement certain control strategies with the ultimate goal of a robust process. A robust process is the gateway to high product quality at the end of the day [9]. Process variability stands as a hurdle to process robustness, and this originates from lack of control on the process parameters. Thus, QbD steps-in to avoidbatch to batch variability in pharmaceutical products [10].

The net outcome of the detailed QbD study (applied in any product) is the segregation of process parameters with respect to their criticality and the finalization of a proven acceptable range (PAR) for every operation. The knowledge that is gained post the QbD evaluation encompasses every minute detail of the operational process as well as the product in general, and lead to the defining of a Design Space. This way, the impact that the manufacturing process might have with regard to the variability of the CQAs becomes apparent, which helps in strategizing testing, quality and monitoring of batches [11].

Process Evaluation: Linking Process Parameters to Quality Attributes

It is important to carefully evaluate the process completely before applying QbD to it. The better knowledge you have of the process, the more effective your QbD will be. Moreover, process characterization is required to specify the proven acceptable ranges (PAR) for critical process parameters (CPPs). In the traditional approach that is implemented in biopharmaceutical production, existing empirical process knowledge is used on a daily basis. However, this approach leads tolaborious and time consuming post approval changes during process adaptation and any new technology implementation that may have become necessary for raising the efficiency of the process. Also, the effects aprocess scale-up can have on the quality of the final product cannot be predicted when using the empirical process development.

This can increase costs and also can cause difficulty in implementing any changes in the set manufacturing process. Thus was born a way to achieve deeper understanding of processes which would lead to greater flexibility and freedom to effect changes. The concept of operation under a pre-defined design space gave this flexibility. Design space is nothing but a concept that is a part of the “Quality by Design” (QbD) paradigm. Now, manufacturers are to follow a science-based process development than their empirical counterpart.

The QbD Concept is Best Explained in this Flowchart Below

Define a Quality Target Product Profile (QTPP) for product performance

⇩

Identify its Critical Quality Attributes (CQAs)

⇩

Create experimental design (DoE)

⇩

Analysis done to understand the impact of Critical Process Parameters (CPP) on CQAs

⇩

Identify and control the sources of variability.

Process characterization sets the ball rolling in any process development, which employs a sound risk assessment rating the various critical process parameters according to their importance [12-14].

Downstream Processing in Biotransformation

Downstream processes of biopharmaceutical industry essentially include the following steps:

a) Harvesting

b) Isolation

c) Purification

Various unit operations that constitute any biopharmaceutical process follow a designed sequence to form an integrated process [15]. Thus, any change in any one of the one-unit operation can affect the functioning of the subsequent unit operations. This is the reason why interaction effects between participating parameters across unit operations should also be taken into account during the process development. Interactions are said to happen when setting of a parameter will show effect on the response of another parameter. Due to this dependence between the parameters, the combined effects of any two parameters hailing from different unit operations cannot be predicted from their individual effects. Regulatory authorities demand inclusion of interactions of parameters within the QbD approach during any process optimization [16]

Example: Downstream processing of 1, 3-propanediol

Process: Fermentation

Fermentation broth that uses flocculation, reactive extraction, and distillation was studied. Flocculation of soluble protein as well as cellular debris that were present in the broth was carried out by using optimal concentrations of chitosan (150 ppm) and polyacrylamide (70 ppm). It was seen that the soluble protein that was present in the broth decreased to 0.06 g L-1. Recovery ratio (supernatant liquor: broth was found to be greater than 99% (Figure 1) [17,18].

The above flowchart shows a typical fermentation process broken down in steps. Glycerol fermentation process is taken as example for the illustration [19].

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Case Study for API

API product development from the very nascent stages require a lot of planning when implementing QbD at every stage. Whether it is two-step process or a multi-step process, each and every operation and parameter needs to be scrutinized before creating a relevant design space. Brainstorming every possible roadblock that might threaten the quality of the final pharma product is what will help design a top-quality process. A futuristic vision is important in the initial steps of QbD planning. The most important part is to pay sufficient attention to detail lest critical aspects might be missed. This is best done by sitting with the entire development team and taking every minor detail into account. Given below is a case study for a API intermediate development process with the help of QbD that highlights the important steps as to how to go about implementing it from the very beginning of your research. QbD is done best, when it is implemented from the very nascent stage of product development.

Quality Target Product Profile

When making your QTPP, make sure you list down everything from your vendor details to target costing. This step basically asks you to think of every aspect of your product and make a comprehensive profile of it. The specification of quality must be highlighted here with all the challenging impurities that might threaten your quality. Everything from stability testing requirements to raw material quality [20] is encompassed in this stage of QbD.

CQA Determination

Given below are some typical CQA parameters that are considered in most of the enzymatic methods of API intermediate preparations.

a) Purity

b) Chiral purity

c) Enzyme residue

d) Assay

e) Appearance

f) Residual Solvent

g) Yield

h) Polymorphic forms

i) Moisture content

j) Melting point (Table 1)

Initial Risk Assessment

The risk assessment can be done in various ways and is the customizable step in QbD. This part calls for a group-discussion or a team meeting where everyone can list down all possible risks related to the project in discussion and grade each one in the list with the amount of risk that it poses. The simplest module suggests you number them 1, 2, 3 with the increasing or decreasing order of the risk threat. A more complicated and detailed risk assessment requires linking of CQAs and CPAs to highlight the risk of their interdependence (Figure 2) [21].

Post risk assessment, comes the control strategies to be followed to tackle the possible risks that are probable. The control strategies are for you to think and execute to achieve your target quality specifications.

Design of Experiment

This is a valuable tool for channelizing your experimental work, to move ahead in a systematic manner. Design of experiments can be of several types: comparative, screening, response surface modeling, and regression modeling [1].

Comparative Experiments: The aim of this study is simple, i.e., picking best out of two options. The selection can be done by the comparison data generated, which is the average of the sample of data.

Screening Experiments: If you want to zero-in on key factors affecting a response, screening experiments would be the best bet. For this, list down concise list of factors that might have critical effects on response that you desire. This model serves as preliminary analysis during development studies.

Response Surface Modeling: Once you have identified the critical factors that affect your desired response, response surface modeling comes handy to identify a target and/or minimize or maximize a response.

Regression Modeling: This is used to estimate the dependence of a response variable on the process inputs.

A step by step guide is given for the DoE step of the QbD process (Figure 3).

Response columns were filled post experimentation as per the design creation (Figure 4).

Factorial Design Analysis Done as Given Under

Analysis Done First for One of the Responses, “Yield”: (Table 2)

P-Values Were Checked for Significance and Higher P-Value Term Eliminated First to Create a Reduced Model:

(Table 3) (Figures 5 & 6)

Observation

From the above graph, significant interaction between the two terms can be inferred.

Analysis Done for the Response “Diacid”: (Table 4)

P-values Checked for Significance and Higher P-Value Term Eliminated First to Create a Reduced Model: (Table 5) (Figure 7)

Observation

From the above graph, significant interaction between the two terms can be inferred.

Response Optimizer Was Used to Optimize Both The Terms With Respective to The Given Responses- Yield and Diacid: (Table 6) (Figure 8)

The optimized parameters predicted for maximum yield and minimum impurity (of di-acid) was found to be 8pH and 37C.

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Case Study 2

As mentioned before, regression analysis is another important tool that can be used to study existing data. This means that if you have done some experiments (without designing them beforehand), you can quickly run a regression analysis of the collected data to derive a relationship between CPPs and the reaction results.

A lot of times, when one follows the one-factor-at-a-time optimization process, by the time any CPP is optimized, a lot of data stands generated. Instead of just tabulating the data and wasting time manually making sense out of them, regression analysis can come to your rescue. As always, graphical data representation seems much easier to understand and also saves your valuable time.

The effect of pH was studied [22] separately in the preparation of deoxynojirimycin base (stage III). The reaction involved N-formyl amino sorbitol, water, oxygen and whole cells of Gluconobacter oxydans DSM2003. Later involvement of sodium hydroxide and sodium borohydride gave rise to deoxynojirimycin. Further work-up and 2-methoxy ethanol facilitated crystallization yielded Deoxynojirimycin base. In this experiment, pH of the reaction was changed to find out its role during the reaction and a regression analysis was run using Minitab to study this affect.

Observations recorded showed that reaction did not occur at pH2 and at pH8, the reaction did not reach completion. The optimum pH range between 4 to 6 showed certain effect on yield and purity. The significance of pH variation during the reaction was thus established as described below (Graphs 1-3):

When null hypothesis p-test was carried out, no significant effect of pH was to be found on product purity, impurity1 and impurity2, but its significant influence was seen in minimizing impurity3.

Furthermore, large-scale batches conducted were statistically analyzed as well to achieve better understanding of the influence of list of parameters on the output obtained. The following parameters were studied during the stage III reaction described above:

a) pH, RPM and Oxygen cylinders consumed during the course of the reaction.

Their effect on the output and reaction completion time was studied. It was seen that only RPM showed statistically significant effect on the reaction completion time and rest of the factors did not contribute to any significant effect on the output or reaction completion time.

During biotransformation process, i.e. during oxidation of N-formyl using Gluconobacter oxydans DSM2003 whole cell, three main unknown impurities peaks were observed in HPLC chromatogram while reaction monitoring. This process is capable of removing these three impurities during down streaming, work up & isolation to the levels mentioned below:

a) Impurity 1 (has defined RRT on HPLC chromatogram) not more than 3%

b) Impurity 2 (any other unknown impurity) not more than 1%

c) Impurity 3 (has defined RRT on HPLC chromatogram) not more than 10 %

Since higher level of impurities affect the yield of the process, efforts were carried out to study the factors which can reduce the formation of process impurities.

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Conclusion

The concept of Quality by Design (QbD) is highly reliable when it comes to achieving foolproof quality of your product. This is a modern tool that is going viral in Pharmaceutical industry especially because this industry demands high quality standards and tolerates no compromise when it comes to the quality. Breaking down QbD, it essentially comes down to identifying the critical parameters of the process and assigning a particular design space for every single critical attribute. Thus, QbD can be considered as an intelligent approach to quality that yields robust processes. QbD also ensures that there is continuous improvement in the process during the entire lifecycle of a Pharmaceutical product [23].

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Acknowledgement

Our group would like to thank the Department of Scientific and Industrial Research India, Dr. Hari Babu (COO Mylan), Sanjeev Sethi (Chief Scientific Office Mylan Inc); Dr. Abhijit Deshmukh (Head of Global OSD Scientific Affairs); Dr. Yasir Rawjee {Head - Global API}, Dr. Sureshbabu Jayachandra (Head of Chemical Research); Dr. Suryanarayana Mulukutla (Head Analytical Dept MLL API R & D) as well as analytical development team of Mylan Laboratories Limited for their encouragement and support. We would also like to thank Dr. Narahari Ambati (AGC- India IP) & his Intellectual property team for their support.

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[allthingslinguistic]

Part III - How to start a Weird Internet Career

Previously: How I built a Weird Internet Career as an Internet Linguist

A lot of people start their Weird Internet Careers as something more like a Weird Internet Hobby, where you're making some things and putting them on the internet and developing a few people who enjoy your things, and then you're trying to figure out how to convert that into a Weird Internet Career or whether you even want to. 

So let's break that into two pieces: 

How to start a Weird Internet Hobby 

The founding principle of either a Weird Internet Hobby or a Weird Internet Career is something small and repeatable that you can do in parallel to your day job, at least at first, because it takes a while to build. For example, I spent over a year blogging regularly about linguistics while being a linguistics grad student (this was a job, grad students get stipends, don't go to grad school if they're not paying you to go) before anything paying came along from it, though I probably could have sped it up somewhat if I'd tried pitching earlier. 

Maybe you post regular photos of your art or your cat and engage with other art or cat fans. Maybe there's a community of people who are trying to learn a skill you already know things about and you answer people's questions. And so on. You might keep this as a hobby because you're primarily interested in the emotional gratification of making a thing exactly the way you want to make it or connecting with people around a shared interest, you want to be able to stop at any time, or you're content with your existing job and don't want the pressure of trying to depend on the internet for money. All very reasonable, but if you're aiming for a hobby, you don't need to read advice, just keep having fun! 

Aside from the obvious financial reasons, another good reason to start something alongside a day job is that if you're not sure about the whole Weird Internet Career thing or trying to build a portfolio career, you don't want your basic, bread-and-butter, getting-your-name-out-there project to be something that already eats up all of your time. If your first project already takes up all your time, then you won't have any time left to develop other pieces of your portfolio, such as when you start doing more on the money side (the kinds of things that do in combination eventually take over from your day job). 

Thus, the reason why I can run my blog, All Things Linguistic, on its frankly ludicrous daily posting schedule is that if necessary, I can make a post appear in under 15 minutes, because one common type of post I make is links to interesting linguistics things elsewhere that I've vetted for accuracy using my background as a linguist and with a bit of context framing them, so I only spend time writing long posts myself (like this series or linkposts) when I feel like it. This meant I could maintain it as a grad student and while writing a book, and I can easily build up a week-long buffer for when I'm busy travelling or want to take a vacation. 

But the blog also works because it fits into my existing habits: the part where I find interesting linguistics links to post and vet them for accuracy I don't count as work, because I was already doing it long before I started posting in 2012. I was already hanging out in linguistic circles online and noticing when some articles or videos were better than others, and even forwarding articles to specific people or keeping stars or folders so I could find good articles later since, like, oh gosh, 2005? Maybe earlier? (RIP Google Reader.) For someone who doesn't have this kind of time or access or expertise, such as more junior linguists or more casual linguistics fans, it would take them much longer to come across all these links, and they might not be able to really vet them at all, so one reason people follow the blog is for a regular feed of interesting and vetted linguistics things showing up all in one place. 

That's also why I've never tried to directly monetize the blog in a serious way: for the amount of effort it takes now, it would be way more effort to convert it into something monetizable than it is to just keep the blog active and use it as a springboard for other, more easily-paying projects I want to take on, once I realized that people would pay for pop linguistics. (I did a fair bit of reading about blog monetization strategies a couple years into having a blog in order to figure this out though.) But I could probably have similar results if I'd made a blog that produces a post that I do write myself say, once a week. (That's my business partner Lauren Gawne's posting schedule on Superlinguo.) For that matter, three months ago I switched my posting schedule from every day to every weekday and literally zero people have said anything. Which is great! Making things is great, but the flipside is that no one owes the internet endless free content, especially not when it's a hobby. 

From Weird Internet Hobby to Weird Internet Career

But what small, doable thing do you actually make? Are some things better ideas to make than others, career-wise? It's not a sure thing, but there are some hints. The basic principle is you want to connect your interests and expertise to something that's of interest to other people. 

You have a choice, when you make a Weird Internet Thing. You can make whatever you want, however you want. And in that case, people may like it or they might not, you might make a few bucks or you might not, but it doesn't matter! You're doing it for you! That's a hobby. Or, you can care about how many people are following you or how much money you're making, in which case you need to take into consideration what at least some people want, at least some of the time. This is a career. What you can't do is just make whatever you want and also somehow expect everyone to love it and the riches to start flowing in. It's not that everyone needs to love it, just enough people for whatever your business model is. (I feel like there's an obligatory citation to 1000 true fans here.) 

There are two primary ways of figuring out what other people are actually interested in. There's research, and there's experimentation. 

The advantage of research is that it's faster. If you're planning on going into an existing business or market, it makes a lot of sense. You don't waste a bunch of time making stuff that very few people are actually interested in, because you've already done research into things like your prospective customers and where they get their information and what their pain points are and what they're already a fan of and what prices are being offered for similar products and the direct practical outcome that you can offer prospective customers. You can go pretty quickly from building up authority by solving problems for free to launching a paid-for product that solves the same problems even better, and with a greater likelihood of success. Honestly, you can probably make more money. (There are already some pretty decent websites that can coach you through this model so I'm not going to spend much time on it here.)

The advantage of experimentation is that you can be weirder. If you don't even really know why people might like your thing, just that YOU like it and you can't help but want to share it with people, and gosh wouldn't it be great if you could somehow connect with other people who like it enough to make a living out of it, then you probably need to go with experimentation. But even here, there are ways of approaching your consuming passion that make it more or less likely to eventually turn into a career, and that's why this category is called "experimentation" rather than "just do whatever you want".

For example, I'm really keen on linguistics, but linguistics is a fairly big domain, and actively engaging with linguistics can take many different forms. This is where I do my experimentation. 

In my first year of having a blog, I found out that I really enjoy writing linguistics analyses of things I come across in my everyday life, such as memes and pop culture. But my pop culture taste can be….uhhh, somewhat niche. So, while the fans of Night Vale and Lizzie Bennet Diaries and BBC Cabin Pressure enjoyed my linguistics analyses of those shows, there just weren't that many of them in comparison to people who'd seen the doge meme. So I wrote a book about internet linguistics instead of trying to write a book of "linguistics analyses of pop cultural items that appeal to Gretchen McCulloch's highly specific taste." Both of them would have been interesting for me to write, and I do still indulge the hobbyist side by posting linguistics dives into things I find interesting on the blog or on twitter, but for something like a book where I'm investing several years of work in it and hoping people will actually buy it? Yeah, no. 

Experimentation didn't mean I got stuck with something I hated. It means that, of two things I liked about equally, I picked the one that was also clearly resonating with other people to focus on for the career side. Of course, when you spend several years working deeply on a topic that interests you, you discover further depths in it, so now it seems really obvious to me that of course I like internet linguistics! There are so many things I keep learning and wanting to write about with respect to internet language! I have a whole column about them in addition to the book! But writing this series and reflecting back on the early days of the blog has reminded me that this wasn't as obvious at the time. 

Many people who have passions that influence the kind of work they're looking for feel more strongly about certain areas than others. 

Do you care about working with a particular group of people? (eg students, people in your local area) 

Do you care about working on a particular topic? (eg linguistics, science, history) 

Do you care about working in a particular format? (eg writing, coding, drawing) 

Do you care about working in a particular style? (eg teaching, making, analyzing) 

Do you care about working in particular conditions? (eg flexibility, stability, geographic location, travel, with or without people) 

Personally, I knew I was in "topic" (linguistics) and loosely in working conditions (I don't want to have to get up at 6am every day), but it turns out I’m pretty flexible about formats and style and people. 

I sometimes confuse friends who are writer-writers because, when we're out for coffee, I'll tell an interesting anecdote about my life and they'll say "That's a great story. You should write it up". I always reply, "Nope, I only write about linguistics," and they're kinda like "Wait, what?" For me, I find this very relaxing — it helps draw boundaries around what of my life I put out for public consumption — but my friends who care about writing as a format probably think I'm a fool for letting a perfectly good writing topic go to waste. 

Similarly, I'm always surprised when someone who has one podcast starts a second one. I have one podcast, it's about linguistics, and I have no intention to start a second one because I have literally no idea what it would be about. The only topic I want to podcast about is linguistics. I guess I could start a second linguistics podcast that's different in some way (shorter? longer?) but this seems inefficient and confusing. But of course this makes complete sense for people who care about podcasting or audio as a format. 

Other times, you'll read stories about people's career changes and they'll say things like "Well, it's great, because I still get to help [Group of People] or I still get to [teach, make things, analyze data], I'm just doing it in a different way." Or you see people talking about career progressions, such as shifting to a meta-level (managerial, instructional, editorial) position, which can be satisfying for someone whose primary goal is to help a particular group of people (now they can help them at scale!) but frustrating for someone whose primary goal is to work in a particular format (now they don't get to write or code or work hands-on anymore). 

One general tip for thinking about which of your things might resonate with people or why some of your things are resonating more than others is to compare them with other things that already do. Maybe you research some questions or problems that people search for, in some domain where you have expertise, and make helpful posts or videos that solve their problems or teach them how to solve them for themselves. Maybe people are already fans of a particular song or some existing characters, and your covers or fanart help them find you and start appreciating your original stuff as well. Maybe your webcomic or weird bot captures a relatable slice of modern life or your photos bring people bring people laughter or warm fuzzies. In my case, maybe people who are already invested in a meme or cultural phenomenon would also like to read a surprisingly deep linguistic analysis of it.

You may also have things that you know would be popular but that you're unwilling to compromise on (it's YOUR Weird Internet Career, and not anyone else's, after all). For example, there are certain language topics that I just won't touch. I know that the typical audience of people who think they like language stuff would LOVE to read witty rants about The Youths that confirm their sense of smug superiority. But I cannot ethically produce something so false and so harmful. So I have a harder time attracting an audience, because I need to either convert traditional language fans away from being cranks or convert general nerd audiences into language fans, but on the plus side I can sleep at night, I get recommended by other linguists to their friends and families and students (since linguists aren't language cranks either), and the smaller number of people who do follow me are more pleasant and open-minded people. And, hopefully, I contribute to there being fewer language cranks in the world rather than more of them. 

It's not being fake or inauthentic to figure out the intersection between "things that you're willing to produce" and "things that other people want to consume". It's literally just running a business. Your local ice cream shop doesn't get to stay in business if they only make ice cream flavours that everyone finds disgusting just because it's "true to their artistic vision" (though they might do well with a mix of weirder or experimental flavours along with crowd-pleasing classics!), or if they're only open during months where the weather is unsuitable for ice cream because they "don't believe in going with the crowd" (though they might do well by being open later than other local ice cream shops). 

It's easy for people telling the stories of their Weird Internet Careers (or other careers, for that matter) as a question of staying true to yourself. I think that's a combination of selective memory and survivorship bias. You might genuinely remember the early days of a career as "I was unfocused for a while but then I found my true idea and stuck with it" when what might have actually happened was, you tried various things and then one of them resonated with people so you realized it was a good idea and went for it. Which is actually great! Plus of course, there are plenty of bands that disband, startups that fail, hobbyists that never make it big. They too, had visions. 

When you buy or watch things yourself, you don't engage with them because the creator is a nice person or was true to themself. You engage with them because there's something there that you're actually into. Other people also have this same autonomy. If you don't offer people something they want, they...won't want it. I don't know how to make this any clearer. 

If people are telling you they love this one thing you make, that doesn't mean that you have to make only that exact thing for the rest of your career. But it is useful to figure out what it is that they like about it, and how you can give them more of that general principle in a way that you still find satisfying. Or if you make things in multiple categories, and some people only like a particular part, it can be useful to give them ways to primarily follow the part they like so they're not annoyed at being stuck following everything or nothing. 

(For example, people might be more or less interested in my assorted linguistics thoughts at unpredictable intervals as compared with the more measured posting schedule of the blog, and some people do or don't love listening to audio, so my personal website and personal twitter are distinct from the blog's website/twitter and the podcast's website/twitter, although they sometimes cross-post each other.)  

If you genuinely only make stuff that's so weird it's impossible to tell whether people are going to be into it or not, then you might also want to focus on making a whole lot of different things each with a relatively low investment of time/money and releasing them into the world with open expectations. (Here's a good talk about this strategy as buying lottery tickets.)  

Summary steps from Weird Internet Hobby to Weird Internet Career

Start a Weird Internet Hobby regularly producing something that interests you, which doesn't take up too much of your time or money

Experiment with different incarnations 

Pay attention to what people like, respond to, ask questions about, try to buy 

Keep an eye out for potential role models/business models in adjacent spaces 

Assess which things you're willing to compromise on and which things you aren't (topic, format, market, etc) 

Keep producing and experimenting and paying attention to how people respond

That brings us to the "paying for" side. How do you convert "making a thing that people value" into exchanging some of that value for money? That's the topic of the next post.

I’m posting this series about Weird Internet Careers and how to build them to my blog over the next few weeks. However, if you want to get the whole series now as a single doc, with bonus Weird Internet Career-building questions to think about, you can sign up for my newsletter on Substack here, which will also get you monthly updates about my future Weird Internet Career activities as an Internet Linguist.

Part I - What is a Weird Internet Career? Part II - How I Built a Weird Internet Career as an Internet Linguist Part III - How to start a Weird Internet Career Part IV - How to make money doing a Weird Internet Career Part V - What can a Weird Internet Career look like? Part VI - Is it too late for me to start my Weird Internet Career? Part VII - How to level up your Weird Internet Career

[d2kvirus]

Dickheads of the Month: September 2020

As it seems that there are people who say or do things that are remarkably dickheaded yet somehow people try to make excuses for them or pretend it never happened, here is a collection of some of the dickheaded actions we saw in the month of September 2020 to make sure that they are never forgotten.

Remember how proven liar Boris Johnson said he had a world-beating oven-ready Britait deal, which was also the basis of his election slogan campaign of “Get Britait done” and the lack of support for the deal is the reason he sacked 21 of his own MPs?  Just asking, because he tore the whole thing up and said it was unworkable - which also led to Brandon Lewis saying in Parliament, so it is now forever enshrined in the Hansard, that De Pfeffel merely broke international law “in a very specific and limited way” - you know, sort of like how the Manson Family broke the law in a very specific and limited way

The bold vision of a new BBC shared by Tim Davie was revealed when he threatened comedy shows with the axe if they kept making jokes about Britait, the Tory Party or Donald Trump on his first day on the job, because as we all know the best form of comedy comes from punching down rather than up, which is why Little Britain definitely hasn’t aged appallingly

Master of decorum Donald Trump couldn’t even wait a few short hours after Ruth Bader Ginsburg’s death before he started rallying the foot soldiers about cramming somebody more fitting with what he wanted into the Supreme Court

Mayor of Amity Island governor of Florida Ron DeSantis continued his bid to be recognised for having the worst response to the Covid pandemic in the congress of having the worst possible response to the Covid pandemic by deciding that, actually, the state of Florida needs to lessen its Covid restrictions at a time when cases of Covid have begun to rise alarmingly in the state

It’s no surprise that proven liar Boris Johnson lied in Parliament by referring to Serco’s failing test & trace app as “NHS Test & Trace” - however the biggest issue is that the BBC had been using the exact same phrase for at least two weeks before that

Nobody was surprised to hear smirking cretin Priti Patel personally using the term “activist lawyers” that the Home Office (headed by P. Patel) had previously used to dehumanise and demean people upholding those pesky immigration laws that the Tory Party really don’t like getting in the way

Tax dodging orange goblin Donald Trump was asked a simple question: Do you think that white supremacists are a problem?  We are still waiting for an answer to that question...

Okay, so now the Conservative Party are cracking down on people breaking lockdown, with threats of a £10,000 fine - rather than circling the wagons around them and throwing out one cock and bull excuse after another like they did when Dominic Cummings broke lockdown to nip off to Durham after testing positive for Covid on what just so happened to be his wife’s birthday

You know that Matt Hancock is good at his job when, having been sent out in front of the cameras to defend The Tory Party appointing ex-Australian PM and all-around arsehole Tony Abbott as a trade advisor in spite his history of misogynistic, homophobic and “Let’s kill the elderly so we can survive Covid” comments the best he could do was say he was a good negotiator...which promptly led to all manner of comments about Harold Shipman being a good GP and Fred West laying one hell of a patio 

According to Jacob Rees Mogg the public having a legitimate complaint about it being damn near impossible to have a Covid test is nothing more than “endless carping” and not, say, legitimate criticism of a woefully underprepared government trying to coast by on the bare minimum who have the gall to try and blame the public for their long list of catestrophic fuckups

It was no surprise to hear proven liar Boris Johnson hand-wringing about “the freedom of the press” after Extinction Rebellion finally realised that being annoying idiots is far more likely to gain support if you’re being annoying idiots with a purpose - just as it was no surprise to hear that proven liar Boris Johnson had no opinion whatsoever of Tim Davie telling BBC newsreaders to fall in line with the corporation (read: Tory) line or they’d be sacked

Once again there was a chance for Keir Starmer to show that his talk of being “true Opposition” is more than a soundbite and, once again, he wimped out on it when ordering Labour MPs to abstain from voting on the Overseas Operations (Service Personnel and Veterans) Bill for fear of being accused of being “anti-British” by voting for a bill created to stop prosecution of British troops for using torture instead of voting against it - and then sacking Nadia Whittome, Beth Winter, and Olivia Blake from their junior ministerial positions when they were three of the 18 Labour MPs who voted against it

It clearly never occurred to Marsha Blackburn when she was browbeating people about the Constitution of the US never being rewritten that the Constitution of the US has been rewritten several times already.  There’s a reason they’re called “Amendments” and not “Footnotes” you know...

Smirking cretin Priti Patel proudly stated that, if she saw her neighbours, she’d gladly call the police due to them breaking the law.  This was around 14 hours after she’d voted to break international law in the Commons, or a few short years after she broke ministerial code by nipping over to Israel to have undisclosed meetings with israeli officials, which begs the question about whether her neighbours are just as willing, doesn’t it?

Judging by Alan Sugar tweeting out conspiracy theories about Covid being created in a Wuhan lab, I think it's safe to say that no Apprentice game show host is capable of not acting like a complete arse on Twitter.  Luckily for the UK, Sugar isn’t Prime Minister - he’s merely a member of the House of Lords...

It’s been a while since WWE acted like totalitarian dicks to the wrestlers employed independently contracted to them but they managed to find one by telling every single one of their employees independent contractors that they could no longer use Twitch or Cameo as it was decided this was being “detrimental” to the company...you know, the bunch of carnies who sign billion dollar deals with our journalist-murdering, woman-oppressing, Yemeni-slaughtering, 9/11-planning “allies” Saudi Arabia, don’t have any for of healthcare for their employees independent contractors, continued a pay per view even though one of their employees independent contractors died due to a stunt going wrong that was linked to the company cheaping out on a safety harness, and apparently not knowing that the term “independent contractor” doesn’t mean the company can sign them to five year deals but sack them at any point - and then prevent them from working anywhere else for 90 days

We had confirmation of Alison Pearson possessing a terrifying combination of pig ignorance and outright sociopathy when she began a Telegraph article with the following: “My son has Covid-19.  Good.”

Sour grapes from Lisa Nandy over people forgetting she was in the Labour leadership race judging by how she apparently didn’t listen to a party pledge to tax corporations and instead spout off a bunch of nonsensical gibberish that sounded uncannily like Britain First rhetoric under the belief that sounding like Britain First is guaranteed to win back working class Northern voters

Litigious TERF JK Rowling revealed her latest book is about a man who murders people while dressed as a woman, which definitely hasn’t drawn any form of comment whatsoever...

You would like to believe that reports of Limestone Games not only effectively stealing the game Aeon Must Die! from the actual dev team who were forced out of the company by a culture of abuse and harassment by a shady cabal who took over the studio would have eld to the game’s release being postponed, especially after it emerged that assets used in the game’s trailer were infringing on various copyrights - but instead Focus Home Entertainment responded by twiddling their thumbs and doing nothing

I’m sure there’s no connection between Alan Sugar demanding people go back to work as if the number of Covid cases has been rising to an alarming degree and how Alan Sugar is bemoaning that his commercial property portfolio is not making him “enough” money due to people staying at home.  None whatsoever...

The fact that those moron parents in California started a wildfire after setting off fireworks for their baby’s gender reveal party that led to over 20,000 people having to evacuate their homes is dickheaded enough - but the fact that it’s not the first case of this happening, as a similar incident happened in Arizona back in 2018, makes them look even more dickheaded

If you want to say you put Britain before anything else, like Andrea Jenkyns did in her latest Twitter tsunami of childishness and spite, it doesn't look good when you say you're pro-Trump before pre-De Pfeffel as it defeats your own argument almost as fast as being Andrea Jenkyns - or, you know, failing to spell the word “British” correctly when accusing people of being anti-British

It would have been wise if West Ham announced that manager David Moyes and two players had tested positive for Covid before their match with Hull - not after the match had kicked off, leading to Moyes legging it out of the stadium

Whatever it is in the mind of DeAnna Lorraine that snapped and had her babbling insane nonsense that The Masked Singer is part of a covert plot to have people wearing masks probably can’t be repaired, and appears to have also caused her to accuse anyone who thinks she does sound insane of being acolytes of George Soros

Professional victim Laurence Fox somehow believed that posting a chat log of a conversation between himself and Rebecca Front and then howling about being “cancelled” - and then a few hours later had to very publicly backtrack, no doubt because his agent had several dozen words with him

I have no idea why David Cameron convinced himself that showing himself helping out in the Chipping Norton food bank was a good idea, considering he’s the reason why food banks exist in the first place

How nice of Manchester Metropolitan University to tell the students who were confined to accomodation so unable to go out and buy food, who were paying £9000 tuition fees for face-to-face tutoring that was done via Zoom that makes such good value of the hundreds of pounds of rent they have to pay per month when they could have had those same lectures from home, that they’re not allowed to protest about this situation and had to take any signs posted on their windows critical of the government down immediately

In normal circumstances Mason Greenwood and Phil Foden sneaking girls into the England team hotel would look pretty stupid, especially in Foden’s case considering the odds of his live-in girlfriend not finding out about this are practically nil, but during a global pandemic it looked so incredibly boneheaded it’s lucky they play for the Manchester clubs otherwise the front pages would be calling them ignorant traitors or some such bullshit

Nothing sums up Premier League referees quite like them clearly not understanding the current definition of the handball rule, but rather than actually look it up they make it up as they go alone leading to more penalties being awarded for handball in the first four rounds of Premier League fixtures than in entire seasons - not helped by Premier League referees also operating VAR, where they seem to have a policy of “If you ignore my cock up, I’ll ignore yours”

And finally, inventing yet another terror atrocity, is Donald Trump and his batshit insane proclamations about cans of soup being a much bigger threat to American lives than, say, and AR-15.  But then again, it’s not like his support base has a habit of throwing cans of soup at crowds of people

[merlinmyrddin]

What's your favourite part of The Curse of Silence? And what's the story you're most proud of?

As The Curse of Silence will be discussed here, readers discretion is adviced.

I have different favourite parts. One of them is when Arthur retrieves the portfolio. (Chapter 5)

With a deep breath, he extracted what looked like a collection of portraits. His shoulder relaxed as from all what he imagined, this wasn’t gonna give him nightmares.

And this sentences are followed by the most horrific discovery that Arthur could have imagined. He is physically sick. To the point where even looking at his coffee table becomes impossible.

Then we move on to the start of the sixth chapter. Writing a rape scene is not easy. Writing a rape scene involving a twelve years old was even worse. But I am proud of the result, as the total indifference with which "The man" watches the video, mixed with the graphic description. The shortness of the paragraph. The clear disgust that the readers feel whilst "The man" is just nostalgic. It is not a favourite part for the content, but it is a favourite part for the way it transcribes the action. It is sickening, no room for misinterpretation. This scene is a call out. And it's a nightmare, for all of us.

The whole Morgana story arc is also one of my favourite from all the characters. She is broken, yet she stands tall. She tried to take her own life, she was raped repeatadly, she got pregnant whilst she was still just a kid, but she is here. Despite all what happened to her, she never lost her dignity. She is not a victim anymore, she is a woman, and a strong one.

And we move into the murder cover up. (Chapter 12). The whole chapter was amazing to write, juggling with the ten characters, all in motions. The texts messages telling a story, while their actions tell an other. The way they manage to connect each other to justify their relation without raising suspicion. Arthur and Leon using their forensic knowledge. It's all coming together. None of them is breaking down. None. Until it's all too much, and all too nothing. All emotions are passing by in a blink of an eye. It's done :

He did not know what overtook him : despair, fear, exhaustion or else but without realising his own action, he seized the back of the head and smashed it once again in the windscreen. And once more. The third time, he felt the neck breaking under the impact. He undid his seatbelt and laid the body on its back, torso resting on the passenger seat. He opened the car door, the cold from the forest slapping him. He buried his face in his hands and kneeled, unbothered by the dew soaking the leather. A mute scream escaped his lips, and his arms dropped on his sides. The slow purr of the British drizzle meeting the tree leafs was now accompanying the beating of his heart as his eyes were directed towards the stars, reminding him of the futility of all existence. 

Merlin ran back to the road, oblivious of the sudden rain and cold. He bent over the ravine, arms leaned against the trunk of a twisted spruce. Panting, his voice would not escape his throat as he tried to call Arthur's name. A hand finally appeared, gripping a moss covered rock, followed by a familiar face. Merlin was submerged by a manic laugh, the biggest grin plastered on his lips. His hand ran through his hair as he looked up, thanking who ever was willing to listen. 

This post is becoming long, and I have no idea how to do a "keep reading" link so I'll be quick here.

Merlin's anxiety attack, Lance's death, Mordred's revelations. Those are all parts that I cherish.

But then, we have the final chapter. The Trial. We know the story, we know what happened but the court does not. And they can not know. Everything has subtext.

The cliffhanger from the chapter 15, as Cenred enters the Crown is cut short. We never get to read what happened. Not really. Instead, the chapter 16 starts four years later, with an article:

“Merlin Emrys is to appear before the Crown Court this Tuesday for the alleged murder of Arthur Pendragon, Morgana LeFay, Gwaine Greene and Cenred Fyrien, four years after the now infamous Camlot Massacre. The trial will be held over the next two weeks. As requested by Annis Gorlois ( Mr Emrys' defense advocate), the trial will be held with no jury, following concerns for the safety of the public. We believe it to be important to remind the public that Mr Emrys is innocent until proven guilty. The witnesses' names are yet to be disclosed to the press.”

And it ends with an article. And truly, nothing in between really mattered, did it?

“Mr Emrys avoids trial by committing suicide.

Following the death of Gaius Borden from natural causes yesterday, Merlin Emrys took his own life. Two guards found the body at Woodworm prison, where he was currently held on remand. The autopsy states that no foul play is to be suspected.” 

Or did it actually matter?

And London carried on Her daily life. Days, weeks, months and years passed, and slowly, the name of Merlin Emrys had been forgotten, once again. 

But if only the city knew that Merlin had taken his own life by stabbing himself five times – in the back. 

But this story goes beyond being just words on a screen though. Here, I am asking ; would we ever truly know?

Know what? You tell me, for I don't know either.

[thehomierobbstark]

Do you think Erik likes being in front of the camera? Like if his woman was a photographer and asked him to do an x rated photo shoot just for their eyes only. I’m talking baby oil and everything, would he be a little nervous?

+

A/N:  First, l want to say that I absolutely LOVE this question.  I know I’ve been sitting on it for a minute, but every time I read it I get so many ideas in my head of how this would go, and I love how unique this thought is.  I also really wanted to incorporate the above twitter post into a story, so I figured this would be the perfect opportunity! I broke this up into two parts because I felt like it would flow better, so more is to come for this. As always, thank you for asking!  I hope you enjoyed my interpretation of this!

Warnings: At the bottom 👇🏿👇🏿👇🏿.

This is for all my lil cute ass black gorditas out there rockin back fat, belly rolls and thick ass thighs that touch!!  x Reader is always gon be black, chubby, and sassy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I want you to come home.”

Erik lies face up on the arm of the couch, his long legs making his feet dangle over the edge on the other side, his huge body taking up all the space in the middle.  He throws an arm over his forehead, blowing a raspberry and playing with the coiled extension cord that strung out from the base on the wall.

He was soo bored, waiting for her to get back to keep him company and make his night much more interesting.

“Baby, you know I’m working late tonight.  I won’t be back for another few hours, I’ve got one more client left to shoot.”  Y/N looks out the large glass window of her downtown studio, looking at the traffic pile up down below.  

She hears him groan on the other side of the line, followed by the sound of shuffling.

Erik sits up, leaning over the back of the couch to look at the wall clock.  6:47.  He kisses his teeth, pressing the phone back to his ear as he lays back down.

“Is this that same picky ass indie chick that cancelled on you twice already?”  The bass in his voice comes out, and she can tell by the way his breathings changed that his nostrils are probably flared out in irritation and his grip on the phone is tighter.

It was 6:47 on a Friday night, and instead of being laid up on the couch with him, his baby was still at the studio waiting on some flake.

“You should’ve told her to find somebody else, my baby time far too valuable to be sitting around for some bummy ass knotted haired white chick to show up.”

“Relax, babe! Please? She called earlier and told me she’d be here at 7:15.  I’m good babe, I promise.”  Her voice is soft and soothing in his ear, and the veins in his forehead smooth down at her request.

Fine.  He’d relax.  But only because she’d told him to.

Rolling over to his side, he changes the subject, not wanting his own sour mood to influence hers before the shoot.

“You eat yet?”

“…No,” she admits, voice meek.

“I’ve been caught up in portfolios since three, but I’ll see if I can take a break around 8:30 and order in.  Maybe that Indian place down the street?”

It was one of her favorites, and she’d discovered it one day when she was scoping the area for her studio a few years ago.

“You ain’t eat since WHEN? Uh uh. I’m coming down there Y/N.  That lady got you and me fucked up.”

He shoots up from his spot on the couch, reaching over to grab his Nike Air Bakin’s he’d kicked off earlier.

“Erik-”

“Nah babe, that bird not coming, and my girl not going hungry a second longer.  Call up that Indian place and order what you want. I’m on my way.”

She doesn’t even have a chance to dispute the plan before he air kisses her over the phone and hangs up, the hum of the dead line left ringing in her ear.

“Well, OK then,” she shrugs, and she holds down the switch, listening for the dial tone before typing in the number to Akbars Indian Restaurant.

~

At 7:30, Erik rolls into the parking structure under the building, the warm to-go boxes of Indian food filling the car with their mouth watering aroma.  He’d taken it upon himself to order a couple extra samosas and garlic naan, even though Y/N said she was swearing off carbs a couple days ago.  

He knew she loved the baked goods, and even though she didn’t agree, he loved the way she looked when she carried some extra weight on her.  All he wanted to do was keep her fat, happy, and laughing.  

His perfect little plump princess.

He keys himself into the building, riding the freight elevator all the way up to the top floor.  He lifts up the gate with one hand, stepping onto the dark marble floor of the wide open space and hearing the melody of soft jazz echoing around from the overhead speakers.

She often liked to work while playing music, stating that it helped to get her mind in the zone.  He eases up on his heavy footsteps to quietly navigate his way through the hallways, the veins in his forehead making a comeback.  

Even if that bird did end up showing up he didn’t care, she was just gonna have to wait in the lobby or some shit while he pulled Y/N aside for a lunch break.  And if she had any problems about that she could speak directly to him.  He had a few things of his own he wouldn’t mind getting off his chest.

He turns the corner into the main room, seeing a white backdrop and studio lighting on the far wall, the reception desk mirroring it on the other end of the room.

A few white leather couches decorated the space in the middle surrounding a dark oakwood coffee table, and off to the side laid an old quilted blanket with a couple floor pillows thrown on top, looking out of place.

He puts the food down on the coffee table and walks around, looking to see where Y/N is.  Before he can exit out into one of the neighboring storage rooms, she appears from around the corner, carrying some silver utensils and napkins from the kitchen as well as a couple bottles of water.

Her face warms as she sees him, mouth spreading open to reveal that gorgeous million dollar smile of hers that Erik couldn’t get enough of.

“You’re here,” her voice is airy and light, and he walks to meet her halfway, enveloping her into his arms.  She lets herself be engulfed, burying the side of her face into his chest.

They stay like that for a few minutes, no words being said as they hold each other, Erik making soft grunts of contentment as he presses kisses into the top of her head.  He lets the smells of her blueberry scented hair products fill his nostrils, taking in a huge breath.

“I missed you.” He finally speaks, and she leans her head back, neck craned as she looks up at him, resting her chin on his stomach.

“I missed you too,” she smiles, and she links her arms together behind him, his head dipping down low to kiss her on the lips, groaning lowly at how soft and plush like they feel against his.  

He closes his eyes, letting his mouth lazily rest on top of hers, too comfortable to move away.

“Where patchouli at?” He mumbles against her mouth, and she snorts a laugh.

“She not coming.”  She sighs, and he sniffs, giving her an admonishing Uh huh, told yo ass.

“Whatever,” she grunts, peeking around him towards the coffee table, the smell of the Indian food sparking the interest of her nose and her stomach.

She tries to pull away to go check out the awaited meal, but he pulls her back, whining from the back of his throat.

“Mmm nooo, I’m not done yet.” He lays his head on top of hers and holds her in place, her weak little attempts at wiggling out of his grasp failing miserably.

“Mooveee,” she moans at him, fake crying. “I’m hungryy.”

He can hear the pout in her words, and he smacks his gums and lifts off of her, succumbing to his baby girl.

“Fine.  But I’m laying on you while you eat.”  He takes her hand and leads her over to the blanket and pillows on the floor, grabbing the bag of food on the way.

“Baby ass…” she comments under her breath, but his ears pick up it, and he drops her hand, swatting her on the butt.

“Yeah and you love it too, don’t even front.”  He remarks confidently, and a bashful smile pokes at her cheeks that she fights from becoming full blown.  She did love it.

They sit, working together to lay out the food, Y/N grabbing one of the brussels sprouts out of the container and popping it into her mouth, chewing hungrily as she finishes filling up her plate.

She sits cross legged, digging in as Erik settles himself with his head in her lap, the rest of his body sprawled out on the floor far out of the range of the blanket.  He doesn’t care at all though, rubbing his large palms against her thighs and nudging his face under her shirt to kiss at her increasingly expanding stomach, happy to see all of the items on his list of three being fulfilled.

He munches on some of the food eventually too, mainly after she’d shoved one of the potato samosas into his mouth to stop his nipping at her tummy so she could finish in peace.  

After scooping the last bits of saag paneer into her mouth, she packs up the leftovers, Erik taking it to go put it in the staff refrigerator.  She folds up the floor blanket, dumping it and the pillows into one of the storage chests lined against the wall.

Before she even realizes he’s back in the room, Erik latches back onto her, wrapping his arms around the front of her waist and puling her back into him, humming into her neck and rubbing her full belly.

“You gon gimme a tour now?” He asks her, and she laughs at their little ongoing joke.

Y/N always changed around the decor and artwork of the studio, utilizing the projects of her latest clients and collaborations to give her fresh ideas and inspiration for upcoming shoots.  

Every few weeks there was a new theme, and since Erik could only visit a couple times a month because of his own busy schedule, every time he came it was like a new experience for him.

Since it was February, her current theme was “Black Love,” her way of honoring both the cultural celebration for the month and the Valentine’s Day celebration that fell in the middle.  There were portraits of several of her old clients hung around each studio room, like family portraits, engagement photo shoots, and maternity spreads.

Each studio had a different focus, too, so it was almost like walking through a museum the way that each room told it’s own story.

Since Erik had wedged himself back into his favorite spot - arms around her shoulders and nose buried in her hair - she had no choice but to waddle herself (and his) out into the hallway to begin the tour, starting with the first door on her left.

Opening the door, they step in, immediately hit with the scent of cinnamon and soft vanilla, and it feels like the aura of the room wrapped them in its arms for a warm, comforting embrace.

“I present to you: Studio One; Age Ain’t Nothin But a Number.”  She smiles lightly to herself at the name she’d borrowed from Aaliyah’s infamous first album.  She’d absolutely loved the artist since childhood, and wanted to pay homage to her legacy, honoring her the right way.

The color scheme was a shimmered gold and deep burgundy, the colors immediately, reminding Erik of his friends grandparents house he’d often visit after school back in Oakland.  Their house smelled exactly the same, and he could even spot the cinnamon broom sticks in the corner, giving off the fragrant smell.

The couch was vintage but it wasn’t old, and the carpet under his feet had him flashing back to the countless nights he’d spent on one just like it playing hot wheels and street fighter Sega matches.  

The whole room reminded him of his childhood, a feeling somewhere between nostalgia and longing striking him in the chest.  It was solidified even further for him when he looked up at the wall and saw the portraits that were hung around.  

Staggered along the wall were pictures of older black couples, some by themselves, and some of couples portraits.

The biggest picture hung in the middle, and it was of a young black couple, maybe early to mid thirties, the man a deep chocolate and the woman and ebony goddess.

It wasn’t until Erik took a closer look that he noticed the clothing they wore appeared to be from an older time.  As he studied their facial features, he realized that all of the pictures in the room were of them, just at different ages.

“One of my first clients,” she speaks from under his chin.  He’d walked them further into the room, stopping in front of the wide portrait to get a better look.

“They came in for a shoot to celebrate their 60th wedding anniversary and they told me their story.  How they met, their first kiss, their first ‘I love you’s’.  Four kids and eight grandkids later, and this is the legacy they’ll be leaving behind.”  She smiles warmly as her eyes roam around the walls, taking in the history of their love.

“I asked if I could feature them in this months theme and in return restore their old photos for them, and they happily agreed.  They even lent some photos of their own parent’s for me to use.”

She points over to the corner of the room, Erik shuffling the both of them over to look at the aged photos from another time.

The both of them observe silently for a few moments, finally separating from each other to explore on their own.  Since Y/N had already seen the collection, she hung by the door, watching as Erik walked around the room like he was visiting and exhibit.

“I wanted this room to represent love in it’s truest form, and how it can survive through the years if you’re willing to put in the work.  It’s never too late to find love, or do everything you can to keep it alive.”

The entire display was absolutely beautiful, and after Erik was done soaking in everything, he felt as if he’d experienced this couples love story, right along side them.

“What are their names?” He asks her, making his way back to her to assume his original position.

“Judy and Maurice Jackson.”  She answers, and it’s almost as if by saying their names it breathes life into the room.

“This is amazing, baby.  You’re so incredibly talented,”  he praises her, and he brings her hand up to his mouth to kiss her knuckles, making her cheeks warm shyly.

“Thank you Erik,” she whispers back, and she kisses him on the cheek before grabbing his arm and pulling him out of the room, turning off the lights and shutting the door behind them.

For the next hour, that’s how they spend their time; moving from studio to studio as Y/N explains the story behind each idea.

The themes explored parental love, familial love, friendship, and cultural identity, the last one detailing just a few examples of how diverse and expansive black culture is in the United States.

Each studio had it’s own name as well, titled in order: ‘Me and Your Mama’, ‘We Are Family’, ‘Way Back’, and ‘Say It Loud’.

The last studio was a private one that Y/N had been working on for the last couple months to get it prepared for a new service she was offering in the spring.

The service would only be available to select clients, but she’d been dying to give it a test run.

Luckily, her favorite client had decided to drop by today of all days, giving her the perfect opportunity to try it out.

Approaching the closed door, she slides herself out from under Erik, instructing him to stay put while she goes inside to get the room ready.

Thinking it’s an interactive theme, he stays put, his only complaint being for her to hurry up because it was cold without her.

A few minutes pass with Erik out in the hallway by himself, and when she finally opens up the door, her small body is looking up at his, her favorite DSLR camera around her neck with a 28mm lens attached to it.

Before he has a chance to voice his confusion she pulls him into the room, shutting the door behind her.

This studio is significantly bigger than the other ones, large enough to fit an entire California King size bed and two sofas, one a suede midnight black and the other a leather blood red.  Fur pelts decorate the ends of the couches, and a gigantic faux white fur rug sits in the middle of the floor.

A couple lighting setups are sitting in the corner of the room, along with a few shaded lamp covers, one in purple, one in red, and the other in white.

Over the bed hangs a low hanging chandelier with both red and purple bulbs alternating around it.

Erik hadn’t said a word since he’d stepping into the space, just the sound of his footsteps as he walks around the room, observing everything.

His curiosity leads him over to a table on the far side of the room, and he picks up one of the many bottles of baby oil sitting on top of it.

He turns around, and his face says it all.

“Y/N….” She can hear the unnervingly calm tone in his voice, meaning that she had about 5 seconds to start explaining before he put a hit out on all her male coworkers.

“Okay BEFORE you start freaking out, just wait a minute and listen.”

His nostrils flare out a little bit and he works his jaw, putting the bottle down and crossing his arms.

“You got one minute.”

She launches into her rehearsed pitch, already having practiced it in her head ten times before she even opened the door to let him in.

“Spring is coming up, and I want to offer a new service to returning customers who’d expressed their interest in the past when I brought it up.  I’ve done their maternity shoots, their engagement portraits, their anniversary photos, and now I want to try my hand at…boudoir photography.”

He opens his mouth to speak, but she cuts him off, still having 30 seconds on the clock.

“It’ll only have a trial run of two months and I already have five clients booked.  It won’t become a permanent service yet until I can get feedback from them, but… I need someone to test it out on first before I can start.”

His eyes grow wide at that, his eyebrows almost up to his hairline.  He’d met a few of her loyal clients, and while he tried to keep it under control, he couldn’t help but be a little bit cautious when it came to some of them.  

She was adored and loved by all of them, and on more than one occasion he felt like a few of the women had tried shooting their shot at her, right in front of him.

When he’d brought it up she’d laughed it off, telling him he was just being paranoid because she was bisexual, but he knew what was up.

No way anyone could just take one look at Y/N and not be immediately drawn to her; she had that effect on people.  He had to protect what they had, and he wasn’t about to just watch it slip through his fingers.

“Nah babe, Ion like it.  You already got way too many people up in here tryna get atchu, they don’t need an entire room dedicated to giving them an opportunity.  Get one of your interns to do it.”  The plain look on his face combined with his still crossed arms indicated that the conversation was over, and there would be no further discussion on the topic.  

He must’ve forgot who he was fucking with.

She narrows her eyes, taking a step towards him.

“First of all, I wasn’t asking for your permission, I was telling you about my next business venture.  I’m a grown ass woman and this is my business.  You have no say here, Erik.”

His eyebrows were raised again, but for a different reason this time. It wasn’t often that he and his girl got into arguments, but when they did he always got just a little bit aroused at the fire in her eyes when she started going off.

She continued.

“Second of all, my interns aren’t paid to soothe your bruised ego, they’re paid to assist me when need and to gain valuable experience in their field.  So try again.”  She’d gotten increasingly closer with each word, and before either of them realize it she’s back in front of him again, her presence dominating.

He gives her a once over before laughing humorlessly, looking away for a moment before speaking again.  

“So, what? I’m not even allowed to have an opinion on this?” His brows are furrowed together, eyes concentrated on her face.

Her own facial features soften, and she reaches out with one hand, holding his face in her palm and stroking her thumb over his cheek.

“Aww babe, of course you’re allowed to have an opinion.”  A small smile appears on her lips, and she finishes her statement.  “Just make sure you have it quietly.”

She drops her hand and turns and walks away to finish setting up one of the light fixtures in front of the bed.

He stares at the back of her head as she goes, burning holes into it with his blazing thoughts.

She was completely right.  He had no place trying to take control over her ideas regarding her studio, especially after just seeing how amazing the outcome could be when she had creative license.

Even so, he couldn’t help but to be pissed with the way his princess was speaking to him.  He’d have to remind her before they left tonight about keeping that mouth of hers in check when she was popping off at him like that.  He figured a few backshot sessions over the front desk would be a good memory refresher for her.

Reaching down to adjust himself through his pants, he grunts in acceptance, following her over to where she was.

“Well, do I at least get to have a loud opinion on who it is you’re gonna be testing this out with?” He pouts.

She clicks the soft white shade into place on the camera, then walks over to the light switch to turn off the main fluorescent lights and tun on the red ones, their subtle glow primarily on and around the bed.

“I hope so baby.  Because you’re the one whose gonna be testing out for me.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Warnings: Fluff, Humor, SoftBoi! Erik

[citizenscreen]

It’s been the practice here to honor notable film-related anniversaries at the onset of every year – Looking back to move forward, if you will. This year there is particular excitement across social media because 2020 brings with it echoes of a century ago, the decade called The Roaring Twenties when youth threw caution to the wind and enjoyed life to its fullest. It was an era of economic prosperity and interesting (to say the least) social and artistic changes, an era of happenings and creativity. Some of that is reflected in films depicting the Roaring Twenties, which – luckily for us – happens to be this month’s theme on TCM.

In all pictures about the Roaring Twenties you’re likely to see the Flapper, perhaps the most familiar symbol of the era. The Flapper helped the decade retain a certain “feel,” one of partying and promiscuity with distinct style and energy. In movie terms you might look to Colleen Moore and Clara Bow to get a sense of what the Flapper was like.

Colleen Moore

Clara Bow

While the flapper enjoyed life throughout the decade, she gained considerable freedoms in 1920. On August 18 of that year the 19th Amendment was passed, giving women the right to vote. Due to the great economy at the time, millions of women worked in white-collar jobs and could afford to contribute in ways they previously could not. The increased availability of birth-control devices allowed for more personal choice and advances in technology helped the effort as well. Many homes in America, especially in the industrialized cities, were now powered by electricity, and effort-saving devices such as refrigerators, washing machines, irons, and vacuum cleaners, most of which were used by women, made life much easier as well.

Other inventions that came to be in 1920 include the hair dryer, invented by a women who inserted a hose in the exhaust of a vacuum cleaner. Brilliant! The traffic light was also born that year thanks to police officer William Potts who used red, amber, and green lights and $37 worth of wire to make his traffic light in Detroit, Michigan. The Band-Aid was invented by a man called Earle Dickson for his wife Josephine who cut herself often. The final invention worth noting was the automobile with the combustion, probably the most popular invention in the 1920s, which facilitated the Flapper lifestyle and led to many new jobs. The popular, reliable, and inexpensive Ford Model T made it all possible – and made it in the movies.

Harold Lloyd in GET OUT AND GET UNDER 1920

Stan Laurel in a Ford Model T 1920, which appeared in several Laurel and Hardy movies

  While previously mentioned freedoms were expanded, others were curtailed in 1920. The most famous being the 18th Amendment to the Constitution, ratified in 1919, but put into effect in 2020. The Federal Volstead Act, formally the National Prohibition Act, established to carry out the intent of the 18th Amendment, banned the manufacture and sale of “intoxicating liquors,” and at 12 A.M. on January 16, 1920, the Act closed every tavern, bar and saloon in the United States. Tragic as that may seem to some, there was plenty of booze to go around thanks to unseemly types who took control of underground “wet” businesses.

Hollywood’s fascination with Prohibition and the times during which it took place have resulted in fantastic film offerings through the decades. Sam Mendes’ Road to Perdition (2002) is one example of a great modern film dealing with the subject. But I am here for the classics and suggest you revisit the following to get a sense of how colorful the world was during the Prohibition era:

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Another right was curtailed on June 13, 1920 when the US Post Office stated that children could not be sent by parcel post. Various instances of this occurrence made the law a necessity.

More interesting facts about 1920:

The average life span in the United States that year was about fifty-four years.

The top ten toys of the 1920s were:

Teddy bears

Erector sets

Lionel trains

Lincoln Logs

Raggedy Ann

Radio Flyer Wagon

Tinker Toys

Crayons

Tin toys

Tiddlywinks

On January 29, 1920 Walt Disney started work as an artist with KC Slide Co. for $40 a week.

On May 1, 1920 legendary slugger Babe Ruth hit his 50th career home run, his first for the NY Yankees in a 6-0 win over the Boston Red Sox. How sweet it was.

On May 16 Joan of Arc (Jeanne D’arc c. 1412 – May 30, 1431) was canonized a saint. Her life has inspired numerous films starting as early as 1900 with Georges Méliès’ Joan of Arc. I must admit I’ve only seen two films on this topic, but can recommend both: Carl Theodor Dreyer’s deeply affecting The Passion of Joan of Arc (1928) and Victor Fleming’s visually appealing Joan of Arc (1948).

On June 2 the Pulitzer prize for Drama was awarded to Eugene O’Neill for Beyond the Horizon.

On July 29 rebel leader Pancho Villa surrendered to Mexican authorities. As it turns out Villa who had an interesting connection to movies as this Smithsonian Magazine article explains.

On November 2, 1920 the first commercially licensed radio broadcast was heard, from KDKA in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. The first broadcast was live results of the presidential election, a transmission of breaking news that was new and unprecedented. The impact of the medium of radio and the importance of this 1920 event cannot be overstated.

1920 in Hollywood

By the early 1920s, the film industry had made its (more or less) permanent move to Hollywood from the East Coast. The face of American cinema was transformed. Hollywood was now the world’s film capital producing virtually all films shown in the United States and 80 percent of the revenue from films shown abroad. Many American towns had a movie theater with over 20,000 movie houses operating in the U.S. by that year. Most Americans went to see the movies at least once a week. The movie industry became a big business. And Hollywood’s position only got stronger as many of Europe’s most talented movie players arrived.

By the end of the decade, the movies claimed to be the nation’s fifth largest industry, attracting 83 cents out of every dollar Americans spent on amusement. It’s only natural then that through this journey Hollywood also became the ideal of many things in the audience’s eyes. In particular the movies excelled at extravagance, fun, and glamour – and they were the primary distraction through tough times. Here’s more…

In 1920, Metro Pictures Corporation (with its already-acquired Goldwyn Pictures Corporation) was purchased by early theater exhibitor Marcus Loew of Loew’s Inc. In another acquisition, Loew merged his Metro-Goldwyn production company with Louis B. Mayer Pictures.

In 1920 C.B.C. Film Sales Corporation was founded in 1920 by brothers Jack and Harry Cohn, and Joseph Brandt. C.B.C. was renamed Columbia in 1924.

On March 28, 1920 the wedding of the century took place when Douglas Fairbanks and Mary Pickford joined in matrimony. Fairbanks bought a lodge for his new bride and it was named Pickfair, a place that soon became the social center of Hollywood. In June 1920 the couple joined fellow newlyweds Frances Marion and Fred Thomson on a European honeymoon.

On April 3, 1920 F. Scott Fitzgerald wed novelist Zelda Sayre at St. Patrick’s Cathedral in New York.

Director John Ford wed Mary Smith in 1920.

Charlie Chaplin discovered Jackie Coogan and chose him to play The Kid released in 1921.

Alice Guy, the world’s first female filmmaker and a key figure in the development of narrative film, directed her final film, the feature-length Tarnished Reputations (1920).

Born in 1920

I am astounded by the talent born in 1920. Expect major centennial celebrations for these important people who have given us so much joy through film and television.

Vincent Gardenia

Constance Moore

DeForest Kelley

Federico Fellini

Delbert Mann

James Doohan

Toshiro Mifune

Jack Webb

Denver Pyle

Peggy Lee

Yul Brynner

Maureen O’Hara

Shelley Winters

Ray Bradbury

Jack Warden

Mickey Rooney

William Conrad

Walter Matthau

Laraine Day

Montgomery Clift

Merlina Mercouri

Hy Averback

Nanette Fabray

Gene Tierney

Ricardo Montalban

Noel Neill

Virginia Mayo

Frances Gifford

Jack Lord

Tony Randall

Ray Harryhausen

Deaths in 1920

1920 is relatively early in the life of the movies so it’s not surprising only one stood out as notable…and particularly sad. On or about September 10 of that year actor Olive Thomas ingested bi-chloride of mercury from a French-labeled bottle in a darkened bathroom, believing it to be another medication. Found unconscious, she died five days later. The death made worldwide headlines. Olive was only 25 when she died.

With Olive’s death came a flood of stories linking her to alcohol and drug use and to sexual promiscuity. The evils of “movie people” were spotlighted along with her death by moralists everywhere. Regardless of the circumstances, which I believe have never come to light, this was the tragic death of a 25-year-old woman. Olive was survived by her husband Jack Pickford who was with her in Paris when the tragedy occurred. You can read more about the life and death of Olive Thomas at Silents are Golden.

Olive Thomas c. 1919

Among the notables who made their film debuts in 1920…

Mary Astor made her film debut by way of an uncredited part in Buster Keaton’s The Scarecrow

Madge Bellamy made her debut in Edward José’s The Riddle: Woman.

Charles Boyer in Marcel L’Herbier’s L’homme de Large

Greta Garbo in Ragnar Ring’s How Not to Dress, which according to the New York Times obituary is a short sponsored by the department story where Greta worked as a sales clerk.

Alfred Hitchcock – Hitchcock submitted a portfolio of title cards for The Sorrows of Satan and The Great Day and is hired by Famous Players-Lasky British Producers Limited. (Hitchcock.zone)

Barbara La Marr , the girl who was too beautiful caught everyone’s attention when she co-starred with Douglas Fairbanks in The Nut in 1921, but she made her debut the year prior in Bertram Bracken’s Harriet and the Piper.

Victor McLaglen in A. E. Coleby’s The Call of the Road (1920) he gets a starring role right off the bat as a gambler-turned-boxer.

Nita Naldi – the story goes that her dancing was spotted by John Barrymore, who obtained her debut role for her in Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1920).

Claude Rains – we see him for a brief moment at the end of the film, but it’s a brilliant turn he delivers in his formal film debut as James Whale’s The Invisible Man in 1933, but as is news to me at this writing, Rains appeared in Fred Goodwins’ Build Thy House in 1920.

Notable Film Releases

Germany’s silent landmark classic, director Robert Wiene’s The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari was released in the US in 1920.

Douglas Fairbanks’ first swashbuckler, Fred Niblo’s The Mark of Zorro (1920).

Buster Keaton made his first solo film appearance in the comedy short One Week (1920), after co-starring with Roscoe Arbuckle for the three previous years.

Legendary Broadway stage star John Barrymore appeared in the adapted Robert Louis Stevenson tale-horror film Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1920) directed by John. S. Robertson.

Ernst Lubitsch’s Passion was released in the U.S. bringing attention to Polish actress Pola Negri.

Way Down East, a romantic drama directed by D. W. Griffith and starring Lillian Gish was a top grossing movie of the year.

Harold Lloyd and Buster Keaton released several shorts each that are worth watching so check out their filmographies and get to it. Roscoe Arbuckle had a slow year given his star status in 1920, but that would all fall apart in 1921 following the Virginia Rappe scandal.

Harry Millarde’s Over the Hill to the Poorhouse or just Over the Hill starring Mary Carr was one of the top grossing films of the decade.

Paul Powell’s Pollyanna starring Mary Pickford was popular despite both screenwriter Frances Marion and Mary Pickford not liking it.

Shipwrecked Among Cannibals, a travelogue/documentary directed by William F. Adler, was the first Universal film to gross $1,000,000.

Cecil B. DeMille’s Something to Think About starring Elliott Dexter, Gloria Swanson and Monte Blue was popular with audiences.

Top Money-making actors

According to Quigley Polls from results of 1919 film releases.

Wallace Reid

Marguerite Clark

Charles Ray

Douglas Fairbanks

Mary Miles Minter

Mary Pickford

Clara Kimball Young

William S. Hart

Norma Talmadge

Theda Bara

Theda Bara in THE LIGHT 1919

◊

I hope you enjoyed these hundred-year-old highlights. I look forward to what I hope will be a stellar, enjoyable year of blogging and wish you and yours the very best. Now, in 1920s lingo, “Go chase yourself!”

HAPPY NEW YEAR…1920, A Centennial Celebration It's been the practice here to honor notable film-related anniversaries at the onset of every year - Looking back to move forward, if you will.

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Be still my beating heart: My longtime partner, Brian Libby, wrote this OR Arts Watch article twinning the stories of two of my favorite artists, actor River Phoenix and musician Elliott Smith, and relating them through their time in our hometown of Portland, Oregon. The original story (link above) shows photos of some of Elliott’s Portland homes and the road with “the fucked-up face” from My Own Private Idaho, but I’ve pasted all the copy below. Hope some of my fellow River and Elliott fans enjoy this as much as I did.

River and Elliott: Remembering two troubled princes of 1990s Portland

River Phoenix and Elliott Smith brushed Portland and maybe Portland brushed them

NOVEMBER 27, 2018 // CULTURE, FILM, MUSIC // BRIAN LIBBY

There’s a name you keep repeating You’ve got nothing better to do

— Elliott Smith, “Alphabet Town”

From James Dean to Jimi Hendrix, Kurt Cobain to Heath Ledger, we have immortalized a constellation of famous artists—especially musicians and actors—who died young and, then, through a combination of their talent and the public’s grief, lived on. Robbed of the futures we imagined for them, yet frozen in time and thus never to suffer the indignities of aging or late-career artistic mediocrity, their luminosity—and our love for them—intensifies as if in proportion to the tragedy.

Portland and Oregon haven’t traditionally produced a lot of bold-type names that have endured in the international pop zeitgeist. Far from America’s entertainment capitols, this is arguably a place where talents are nurtured, not where one becomes a full-fledged star. The most high-profile artists, such as the great abstract expressionist painter Mark Rothko or Simpsons creator Matt Groening, have tended to move on and live their career-defining creative moments elsewhere. Yet even if their time here is fleeting, sometimes these artists don’t just remain culturally relevant long after their deaths but also come to represent something essential about a particular time in the city.

Last month brought reminders of two such one-time Oregonians and what they left behind. October 21 was the 15th anniversary of musician Elliott Smith’s death, at the age of 34 in 2003, while Halloween brought the 25th anniversary of actor River Phoenix’s death, at the age of 23 in 1993. They died a decade apart, but each moment of mortality came in Los Angeles, and the two sites are less than nine miles away from each other: Phoenix outside West Hollywood’s Viper Room club after an accidental overdose, and Smith by stabbing at his home in Silver Lake (a presumed suicide but never officially determined).

The coincidences don’t end there. River Phoenix and Elliott Smith were born within a year of each other: Smith in Nebraska (he was raised until age 14 in Texas) and Phoenix in Madras, Oregon (raised mostly in Florida). Each arguably made his most famous work in collaboration with director Gus Van Sant. Phoenix co-starred (along with Keanu Reeves) in Van Sant’s 1991 film My Own Private Idaho and Smith was nominated for an Academy Award for the song “Miss Misery,” on the soundtrack to Van Sant’s 1998 film Good Will Hunting. Each struggled with drug abuse, which in different ways led to each artist’s untimely death. River Phoenix and Elliott Smith presumably never met, yet each is a kind of fleeting prince of ’90s Portland, and their work acts as time capsule and talisman for the days many locals now look to longingly: a grittier, more affordable and off-the-radar city that predated Portlandia, a succession of swooning New York Times stories, and an ensuing wave of tourism and gentrification.

Like Rothko, neither stayed here for good. But also like Rothko and many of the city’s other most famous sons and daughters, Phoenix and Smith were transplants to the city who saw Portland with fresh eyes. Like rain clouds that give way to bright sunlight almost daily for much of the year, each artist’s Portland-based work is personal and often deeply melancholic, yet also joyful, lyrical and instinctual. It’s not always pretty, yet we are drawn to their work again and again.

By the time Phoenix signed on to star in My Own Private Idaho, he had long since become a star, thanks to such minor Hollywood classics as 1986’s Oregon-filmed Stand by Me and 1988’s Running on Empty, the latter of which brought him an Academy Award nomination for Best Supporting Actor. But Idaho, the third in Van Sant’s trilogy of Portland-set films (preceded by 1986’s Mala Noche and 1989’s Drugstore Cowboy), would become the role of Phoenix’s career and the standout classic in its director’s now decades-long portfolio.

While Drugstore was initially a greater critical success for Van Sant, winning Best Film and Best Director from the National Society of Film Critics in 1989, Idaho is somehow the film that endures in public imagination and as a lasting artistic achievement. Besides being a landmark of gay cinema, casting two young Hollywood heartthrobs as lovers, it also turned out to be Van Sant’s most cinematically ambitious effort.

The premise of My Own Private Idaho is audacious if not a little crazy. The film is a loose interpretation of Shakespeare’s Henry IV, Part I and Part II—the story of a delinquent, debauchery-loving prince planning to shed his skin and embrace his more virtuous monarchical destiny—transposed to the realm of contemporary Portland street hustlers. As legend has it, Phoenix and Reeves spent nights on the streets of Old Town researching their roles by hanging out with the city’s young street denizens, some of whom would enjoy supporting roles in the film.

Phoenix plays a hustler named Mike with a handicap—narcolepsy drops him off to sleep in any moment of stress. We first watch him collapse in sleep by the side of a rural highway, his possessions and even his shoes stripped from him as he slumbers; then he collapses in the middle of turning a trick, carried out of a rich woman’s house by his fellow hustlers and left slumped against a tree. Reeves’s young Prince Hal figure, Scott (in this case a Portland mayor’s son), is along for the ride as part brotherly companion, part lover. Yet this quirky Shakespearean tale is also bookended by and interwoven with a larger quest, played out under the limitless skies and golden hues of the eastern Oregon landscape, as Phoenix’s Mike searches fruitlessly for his long-lost mother: to the Idaho of his youth, to Italy, and finally back to Portland.

Part of what makes My Own Private Idaho so great is how Van Sant conjures indelible cinematic moments: time-lapse footage of clouds rolling over the Oregon landscape; symbolic slow-motion shots of salmon (Mike’s spirit-animal; Phoenix even wears a salmon-colored jacket) fighting their way upstream; and even an entire house falling from the sky onto the highway. It’s dazzling cinema that makes both rural and urban Oregon its muse like perhaps no other movie. That Van Sant has gone on to make several Hollywood movies that overdose on schmaltz and are short on cinematic eye candy, and few if any great works of art (the Cannes winner Elephant and the Matt Damon/Casey Affleck vehicle Gerry perhaps being exceptions) only makes Idaho all the more special in his oeuvre. In fact, it’s as if Van Sant refuses to enter Idaho-like territory. Consider, for example, that his last film, Don’t Worry, He Won’t Get Far On Foot—a profile of cartoonist John Callahan starring River Phoenix’s brother, Joaquin, which is set in Portland and another story of a lonely man’s longing for his mother—was shot in Los Angeles. Suffice to say, there are no houses falling onto the highway.

At least unofficially, My Own Private Idaho owes as much to Phoenix as Van Sant—and not just as it relates to the acting. After all, River Phoenix didn’t just act in Idaho; he reportedly was able to alter the script and his character. The draft that Van Sant brought to the actors didn’t include romance between their two lead characters, but by the time production was complete, Idaho’s most touching moment was a campfire embrace wherein Mike declares his love for Reeves’s Scott. Phoenix is at his zenith here as an actor, a marvel of delicacy, communicating a blend of easy cool and endearing vulnerability.

Both Phoenix and Reeves came to the Idaho cast with something to prove: that they could be serious dramatic actors. To a large extent it worked for both. While Reeves has never been considered a master thespian, his roles in blockbuster franchises like The Matrix and even the more recent John Wick movies have cemented his place in movie history. And for Phoenix, post-Idaho there was no longer any doubt that the child actor we’d seen in Explorers and the angst-ridden teen of The Mosquito Coast (not to mention a memorable “Family Ties” guest-starring turn) had graduated to leading roles with the charisma, looks and vulnerability of a budding superstar. Would it be going too far to say he was the James Dean of his time? Maybe. But the comparison is not ludicrous.

Of course longevity was not to be for Phoenix. Within 25 months of Idaho’s release, his story ended, just like Mike’s, collapsed on the pavement—in this case on a Hollywood sidewalk rather than Highway 216, and sadly, not simply asleep for a few minutes. The brother with him that night, Joachin Phoenix, would go on to enjoy the long acting career River never got.

The year of Idaho’s release was also a turning point for Elliott Smith. In 1991 he had just returned to Portland after four years at Hampshire College in Massachusetts, and promptly formed the band Heatmiser with three musician friends. Over the ensuing years, Heatmiser would become a fixture at celebrated indie-rock clubs like the X-Ray Café and La Luna, while also recording albums like 1993’s Dead Air and 1994’s Cop and Speeder that infused punk energy with melodicism. The band was part of a broader indie rock scene that included Pond, Crackerbash, The Spinanes, The Dandy Warhols and Quasi.

After Nirvana’s breakout success, both indie and major labels began combing Portland clubs looking for the next grunge sensation. And what was grunge but punk with a little more melody and a flannel shirt? Heatmiser received enough attention that a major label, Virgin Records, eventually came calling. But by that time Smith was ready to venture out on his own, breaking up Heatmiser just as they’d made the big time. As the singer-songwriter explained in a later interview, he had grown tired of screaming all the time as a member of a loud rock band. And besides, by that time Smith was gaining notice for a series of stripped-down solo albums with little more than voice and an acoustic guitar. To the astonishment of many, they sounded less like punk or grunge and more like Simon & Garfunkel or Nick Drake. Smith’s solo debut, 1994’s Roman Candle, was released at the height of the grunge era but also just nine months before Kurt Cobain’s suicide, essentially prefiguring (and perhaps even giving birth to) the emo-core wave that would in time follow grunge.

In the four years between Roman Candle’s release and Smith’s leap to international fame with the Oscar nomination for “Miss Misery,” local audiences who had feasted on loud guitars and pounding punk rhythms filled Portland clubs for his solo acoustic shows, trading chaotic mosh pits for stillness and pin-drop quiet. Not only was there the wistful simplicity of Smith’s voice and acoustic guitar. It was also how the singer-songwriter bared his soul in his lyrics. Though some songs were inspired by others’ lives, it was clear that for the sensitive, often-depressed Smith, music was a confessional and a lifeline. Yet in his almost Lennon-McCartney like gift for melody, even his sad songs feel uplifting.

In those early Elliott Smith albums recorded here, through his 1997 masterwork Either/Or (his last for indie label Kill Rock Stars before signing with the mammoth Dreamworks and leaving Portland for New York), the singer-songwriter also painted a cinematic if melancholy picture of the city. You can almost feel the gray wintertime skies in songs like “Alameda,” as he sings:

You walk down Alameda Looking at the cracks in the sidewalk Thinking about your friends How you maintain all them in A constant state of suspense

For your own protection Over their affection Nobody broke your heart You broke your own because you can’t Finish what you start

When the Oscar nomination for “Miss Misery” came, Smith’s life changed overnight. If that new audience and international media attention meant exponentially greater album sales and the end of his penny-pinching way of life—staying in nice hotels on tour instead of sleeping in the van or on some stranger’s floor, not to mention no longer moonlighting as a drywall contractor by day—it also isolated Elliott from his community of not-so-affluent friends and musicians still sleeping on those floors. This time in his life was also accompanied by increasing drug abuse and greater depressions. Perhaps Smith new that despite overwhelmingly positive reviews for albums like XO and Figure 8 as well as a worldwide audience of admirers (he was particularly smitten when a musical hero, Elvis Costello, attended a London show), DreamWorks saw its Smith signing as essentially an investment that didn’t quite pay off because he wasn’t the megastar they envisioned.

Like Cobain, Smith also retained that nagging Gen X rocker’s worry that he’d sold out. Maybe today a young fan who falls in love with Figure 8 doesn’t care that it was recorded for DreamWorks instead of Kill Rock Stars. After all, going to a major label gave Smith a bigger palette of instruments and fellow musicians to work and record with. Yet for Smith, the decision wasn’t without impact. In “King’s Crossing,” one of Smith’s best posthumously-released songs, he sings, “The method acting that pays my bills/keeps the fat man feeding in Beverly Hills.”

Particularly in the couple of years before his 2003 death, Smith was a shell of his former self, consuming cocktails of heroin, crack and prescription drugs. At times onstage, he even had to abort songs halfway through because he couldn’t remember his own lyrics. Yet Smith was also in those final months showing signs of recovery and renewal, which enabled the superlative album he was working on when he died. Songs on the magnificent From a Basement on the Hill (including “King’s Crossing”) exhibit a layered richness of sound that goes beyond what he recorded in Portland a few years earlier. Yet it all screeched to a halt in Silver Lake—whether inevitably, as some observers maintained, or out of the blue.

Today I can’t look at certain places in Portland and Oregon without thinking of them.

For River Phoenix and My Own Private Idaho, there is the Elk statue downtown on Southwest Main Street between Chapman and Lownsdale squares, where early in the film Scott cradles a sleeping Mike in his arms. There is also the stretch of Broadway downtown near the Benson Hotel where the duo cruise the street on Scott’s motorcycle, handsomely and heroically, like cinema’s sunglasses-masked successors to The Wild One and Easy Rider. And perhaps most of all, there is a lonely stretch of Highway 216, east of the Cascades and not far from the tiny town of Tygh Valley, where River Phoenix begins and ends the movie, succumbing to narcoleptic seizure. Last year my partner and I found the coordinates online and made a pilgrimage. To get there you drive white-knuckled through a series of hairpin turns through a small Deschutes River gorge, and then suddenly you come onto a plateau where the road seems to unfold forever.

If one seeks vestiges of Elliott Smith’s Portland, it’s not just the venues where he took the stage (one of which, La Luna, is now a café of the same name), but also, if you know where to look, one of the many Southeast Portland houses where he lived and recorded. Roman Candle, for instance, was recorded in a home on Southeast Taylor Street that recently was listed for rent. (And yes, I admittedly took a tour.) Smith also lived in another Southeast Portland house, off Division Street, that prompted him to sometimes spend late nights hanging out on a bench in the rose gardens of Ladd’s Addition; the documentary Heaven Adores You includes a long shot looking down over the neighborhood. In “St. Ides Heaven,” he writes

Everything is exactly right When I walk around here drunk every night With an open container from 7-11

Division Street itself also wound up inspiring a lyric in “Punch and Judy” (on Either/Or), albeit not exactly an ideal marketing tagline:

Driving around up and down Division Street I used to like it here It just bums me out to remember

Every time I listen to “Punch and Judy,” that line makes me wonder what Smith would have made of gentrified Division Street now, with its canyon of condos and string of popular restaurants. It’s a phenomenon that has swept most close-in east side neighborhoods—precisely the formerly cheap old houses he and his friends used to inhabit.

Even so, to absorb the work of Smith (especially his early records) and Phoenix (particularly My Own Private Idaho) is to make a nostalgic return to ‘90s Portland. And yet, through the power of these works and these two princes’ immense talent, their work also transcends that time capsule. Even if their tragically early deaths don’t guarantee them true artistic immortality, the more Portland changes, the more their works resonate.