#also the title is a lie I took no goddamn notes
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pastryslutsupreme · 11 months ago
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Here r the afformentioned drawings, sashamilla doodles from class + campers from memory. I was also wondering whether Sasha would actually enjoy the club at all but I think the answer is solidly no, too many people but he would like German industrial techno or smth + too lazy to crop lawl
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roseghoul26 · 6 months ago
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König x fem!Reader
Synopsis: After a long day, König offers some much-needed “stress relief”. Tags: Title From A Sabrina Carpenter Song, Bed Chem - Sabrina Carpenter, Edging, Not Beta Read, Fem Pronouns For Reader, Bit Of A Size Kink, Porn No Plot, Vibrators, Fingering, Cunnilingus, König Lifts His Mask The Tiniest Amount To Eat You Out, Scar Kink(?), Is That Even A Thing, Doggystyle, Safe Sex, German Is A Fun Language, Kissing, Cuddling Author's Note: My four-and-a-half years of German classes are finally coming into use (but I’m nowhere near fluent, so correct my mistakes lol). Also contains descriptions of what I imagine König to look like. Everyone is free to their own interpretation. Also I'm like a year too late for this but whatever lol and this one is just pure porn guys, so... do with that what you will Explicit content, minors DNI
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You felt ridiculous. 
Desperate. Anxious. Ridiculous.
Pacing across your small room didn’t help, your frenzied state unending. Anxiety hammered your heart, your stomach twisted in knots, and your hands ached from tensing them so much. Your breathing wasn’t much better, coming and going in quick huffs of air; you felt like you were going to pass out. 
You were a goddamn soldier, a ruthless mercenary; you shouldn’t be acting this way. You’d faced down the worst of humanity and came out victorious; the idea of König coming to your room shouldn’t render you so… timid. 
You’re not sure why you took König up on his offer for “stress relief”. He’d seen how tense you were all day around the base, the reason for that feeling long since forgotten, your words clipped, muscles tensed. It wasn’t an unusual emotion for you, but he’d never offered his assistance. 
Until today. You weren’t quite sure what changed.
A shiver went down your spine when you remembered his voice as he whispered, large frame pressed up close against yours, but not close enough to touch. “Let me help you, Schatz,” he’d said, and you were certain if you could see his face, there’d be a smirk on his lips. You wondered if he knew how you felt about him. 
Desperate to be rid of the tension in your body, and desperate for him, you’d agreed. It wasn’t until you’d reached your room that it sunk in, what you’d agreed to. It wasn’t that you regretted it, far from it, but now your stress levels were even higher than they were before. 
You wouldn’t lie and say that you hadn’t hoped that something like this would happen. You’d had the biggest crush, which sounded so juvenile for someone like you, on him since the moment you’d signed on with KorTac a few years ago. 
And how could you not? He was tall, almost intimidatingly so, with a broad build to match. And the muscles weren’t all for show, just as deadly with his body as he was with his weapons out on the field. You remember the first time you’d watched him take down someone with his hands, a memory that had ingrained itself into your dirtiest dreams. 
As for the rest of his appearance, you weren’t quite sure. He’d never taken off his “mask” (a shirt, you’d later come to find out) in front of you, even when on jobs together. You never pried, though, respecting his need for privacy. And besides, you didn’t have to see his face to know that he was the most stunning person you’d ever met. His eyes, baby blue, yet torturously haunted, were all that you needed to see to confirm that. After years of only seeing them, you’d gotten good at reading them like you would facial expressions. 
Too caught up in your thoughts, you nearly tripped as your foot caught on the edge of your bed, a small, dingy thing. A mix of a sigh and groan left you, as well as a soft curse as you shook your hurt foot. Glancing at the small LED clock beside your bed, the time read 9:26.
König hadn’t given you a time when you asked, only a teasing, “Tonight.” Which meant, that at any moment, you’d hear him knocking on your door.
Or maybe he wouldn’t. Maybe this was all a joke, a cruel one at that. Maybe he knew about your infatuation with him, and this was his response. Deep down, you knew König enough to know that he wouldn’t do something like that, but your anxiety-riddled brain couldn’t think rationally right now. 
Before disappointment could set in, there was a surprisingly gentle knock on the door. But to you, it sounded like two gunshots had just gone off in the room, your ears now ringing in response. 
A soft gasp left you, and you swore your heart stopped. Taking a second to take a deep breath, you fixed your hair as you walked to the door, suddenly worried about your appearance. Your hand shook as you grabbed the handle, time seemingly slowing as you opened the door.
There, just like he said he would be, was König, his body damn near filling the entire doorframe, the tiniest bits of light from the hallway sneaking in. He was dressed down, which made sense for the time of day, so it shouldn’t have come as such a shock to you to see his bare arms. He must’ve been feeling particularly cruel, to be wearing a tight, black short-sleeve shirt instead of his usual loose long-sleeves. His hands were shoved into the pockets of some black sweatpants, and it almost felt wrong to see him like this. 
And as his eyes widened the tiniest amount, you realized that he, too, had never seen you in loungewear. Wearing a tank top and some sleep shorts, you might as well have been naked with the way his gaze roamed over your body, setting your body alight. A part of you wondered if this was the first time he’d looked at you like this, or if your attraction hadn’t been as one-sided as you believed. 
You weren’t quite sure what to say; you both knew why he was here. So instead of making a fool of yourself by attempting to talk, you took a step back, wordlessly inviting König into your room. 
As he stepped in, you watched as his head moved around, taking in his surroundings. Your room wasn’t much, but it was a step up from the shared room you had when you first joined. There was a bed, a full size at most, the headboard pressed up against the wall, with standard-issue grey sheets. A nightstand sat beside it, with the LED clock, and a lamp that currently struggled to fight against the darkness of the night as it poured through the lame excuse of a window that resided at the top of the wall. A few other pieces of furniture, a dresser, a desk, and a shelf, were each in their respective spots, leaving not a lot of free room.
So, as König walked in, your room felt incredibly small, nearly suffocating. It didn’t help that every time you saw König your breathing turned labored, which wasn’t the best thing to happen to you out on the field. But your years of suppressing your desires had trained you well, able to put on an impression that you were unaffected. 
“Do you want this?”
You’d barely heard König, your heart thudding too loudly. He had turned to face you, hands still in his pockets, a casual stance. But his eyes told a different story, hooded with lust, and boring into you. 
Swallowing, you failed to notice the way his eyes zeroed in on the action. Nodding your head was the only thing you could do, never feeling so certain bout something in your life. But you were nervous. What if you disappointed him? What if this wrecked what relationship the two of you had? What if this was all still a joke?
You hadn't expected König to have moved so that he was right in front of you. Was he always this tall? Towering over you, you felt his fingers, free from their usual gloves, grasp your chin, forcing your eyes onto him. A strangled noise died in your throat at the action, but he felt it, and you watched his eyes crinkle in the corners. He was grinning. 
“Use your words, Schatz.” The endearment, although in a foreign language, made you melt. You weren’t entirely sure what it meant, even after hearing it before, but he said it so sweetly that you didn’t need to know what it meant to feel its effects. 
Your heart was fluttering now, your brain fighting between feeling anxious and exhilarated. König must’ve detected this inner battle of yours, something softening in his gaze. The hand holding your chin moved to your wrist, grabbing it loosely enough so that you could pull away if you wanted to, and he slowly pulled your hand up until it rested on his chest, palm flat against his left pec. 
Once the shock of touching him subsided, you were confused as he watched you expectantly. You went to try to speak but were subsequently silenced by König as he shook his head, pressing your hand down harder. It was then you could finally feel beneath your fingertips his heartbeat, much too fast for the casual stance he had earlier. 
He was just as nervous about this as you were.
He let go of your wrist once he saw you felt it, but you didn’t pull your hand away, quickly gaining confidence knowing you weren’t alone in your nerves. “I want this, König.” You were pleasantly surprised to find that your voice was steady, not even the tiniest bit hoarse. I’ve wanted this for a long time.
Pleased, you could also detect the tiniest bit of relief from him, uncertainty playing a part in his nervous behavior. But that was quickly washed away when his authoritative demeanor returned; you’re not sure why you expected anything else. In every room he walked into, he demanded respect, to be listened to. Followed. Obeyed. You just never thought that it carried into more intimate moments. 
You certainly weren’t complaining. Not when you could feel arousal pool in your gut, a pleasant warmth that flowed through your entire body. Not when every word he spoke made you shiver, his accent thick, voice pitched lower. And now that your nerves had died down, all that was left was excitement, which nearly made you just as jumpy. As he brought his masked face close to yours, you swore your breathing stopped; it almost felt like the anticipation you’d feel before a kiss.
But his destination wasn’t your lips, although his eyes did flick down to them momentarily. No, he stopped before they could connect, mask and all. Resting his head against yours, which took a bit of bending on his part, you felt two warm hands begin to trail down your body, starting right at your collarbones. 
You watched as his eyes trailed over your face, gauging your reaction. When he was met with nothing but desire and want, his touch grew more certain, yet he didn’t pick up the pace. His fingers continued to drag down your body until you wanted to push them down to where you wanted. Something told you that that wouldn’t go over well, but you had to admit you were curious to see what his reaction would be. 
You chose to just shift in his grasp instead of trying to force his touch lower, hoping he’d get the message. You knew he did when you heard him chuckle, a sound that always made you weak in the knees, now especially. “Patience.” 
You could detect the warning well enough, but you couldn’t bring yourself to listen to it. “Please, König.” You didn’t care if you were begging. All you could think about was how close he was to giving you what you wanted. 
Another chuckle left the Austrian, but this one sounded more cruel. “You are going to have a long night.”
Before you could even think about his words, he was effortlessly sweeping you off your feet, hands having found their way to the back of your thighs. Insticinvly, your legs wrapped around his body, but you knew he didn’t need the extra help, and you also knew that he wouldn’t drop you. With a surprised laugh, you hung on as König carried you over to the bed, eyes never once leaving your face like he was enraptured by it. 
Unfortunately, the walk to the bed was brief, and before you could get comfortable in his arms, he was depositing you onto the bed. So much for not dropping you. It didn’t hurt, no, more surprising than anything, the breath briefly getting knocked out of you. The cheaper bed groaned under the weight, rusty springs a godawful symphony of noises, but you paid them no mind. 
Hungry eyes watched you from the foot of the bed as you moved up towards the headboard, back resting against it. Once you were settled, König stalked over to the side of the bed, his movements nothing but predatory. Yet oddly enough, you felt safe. You both trusted each other enough to watch over the other while out on the field and so you felt that same trust here. Deep down, you knew that if you were to tell him to stop, he would, no questions asked. Yet you knew you probably wouldn’t need him to. 
But he didn’t sit down, rather moving to the nightstand beside you. Your dazed state quickly dissipated once he started rummaging inside of it, but you were too late to do anything. With burning cheeks, you watched as he pulled out a pink device, which looked comically small in his hands. 
You wanted nothing more than to bury your face in your hands and pray for your demise, yet you were stuck in place once his attention returned to you. You just knew he had a shit-eating grin on his face, and if you weren’t so mortified about him finding the toy, then you would’ve made some comment to wipe it right off. 
Finally, König sat beside you, the vibrator still in his hand. With his other, you felt his touch return to your calf, featherlight, and leisurely making its way to the waistband of your shorts. “You use this a lot?”
“König…” Your voice wasn’t as assertive as you’d have liked, coming out more as a breathy whine. 
“Answer my question.” His hand stopped moving, stopping right at your knee. No matter how you shifted or squirmed, he didn’t move.
With a deep sigh, you tried to ignore the embarrassment you felt when you nodded your head. You then remembered his words from earlier. “Yes,” was all you said, but that seemed to be enough for him, as he continued his ascent with his fingers.
But his tormenting wasn’t done there, as after a few seconds you heard him speak again. “What do you think about?” This question came quieter than the first like he was sharing a piece of gossip, not asking you to reveal your deepest fantasies. 
You. 
The word was on the tip of your tongue, yet you couldn’t bring yourself to say them, to admit to him. How you’d dreamed of moments like this. How you’d imagined him touching you, fucking you, devouring you. So much information was on the verge of being spilled, and you were scared of it happening, too many what-ifs floating in your brain to keep track. 
But any attempt of holding back your words disappeared when König’s hand retracted, and you found the words stuttering out of you, desperate to feel him again. “I think about you, König…” You nearly felt out of breath after, your chest heaving for air, your cheeks now on fire. 
König, much to your surprise, didn’t seem taken aback by your words. Instead, you watched as his eyes darkened even more, which seemed like an impossible feat. “I thought as much,” his voice sounded more like a growl, and you fought the urge to press your thighs together. “And what do I do, when you think of me?”
Now that the cat was out of the bag, you felt less embarrassed about speaking. You were further encouraged when his hand settled on your thigh, pulling lightly at the hem of your shorts. “I… I’ve thought of you using toys,” you glanced at his other hand briefly, “your fingers. Your mouth.” The last one came out more like a whisper; he’d have to take his mask off in order for the last one to be true, and you both knew he wasn’t doing that. 
By the time you had finished speaking, he had reached your waistband, fingers dipping beneath it to brush against your skin. He hummed like he was truly thinking deeply over your words. “In that order?” If it was meant to be teasing, you couldn’t tell. 
Words died in your throat as you struggled to speak, your newfound confidence nonexistent. König, thankfully, took some pity on you, realizing that this was all a bit much. “Would you like me to take care of you?”
That you were able to respond to. “Please.”
An appreciative groan reverberated through his broad chest. “Sehr gut.” You weren’t certain what he was saying, but the infliction sounded like a praise, and your body responded as it would if it had been spoken in a language you knew.
You expected him to continue speaking, so imagine your surprise when in one strong tug, he tore your shorts off your body, before throwing them somewhere in the room. You heard an audible gasp from him when he saw you were completely bare underneath, completely exposed to him. You watched his hands flex from where they hung in the air, momentarily taken aback, his restraint pulled tight. 
He recovered quickly, blue eyes obscured by black irises now staring at you. “No underwear?” It was a redundant question, yet he asked anyway, wanting you to admit to it. Sheepishly, you nodded, your reward being a low chuckle. “Gott, you are trying to kill me.”
That was the last thing he said before he was settling at the end of your bed, right where your feet sat. His unoccupied hand grabbed your ankle, pulling your legs apart so that he could settle between them. With both thighs resting on his shoulders, you could no longer close your legs, unless you wanted to suffocate the man between them. You doubt he would complain, though. 
His face was inches from your center, and you could feel the heat radiating from him with each breath he took. His eyes had left your face, now drinking in the sight before him, and you could tell he was pleased with what he saw. Quite pleased, if the groan he let out told you anything. 
“So wet already,” he murmured as if he was surprised. You had little time to feel any sort of embarrassment, before two wide fingers ran through your folds, collecting the arousal there. You watched, then, as he brought his fingers below his mask, and you were able to fill in the details as his eyes fell shut with a hum of appreciation. 
Very much distracted, you’d momentarily forgotten about the device in his other hand until the unmistakable buzzing noise filled the air. Your breathing was labored as you waited for his next move, where he would touch you next. You, luckily, did not have to wait long to find out, as those two fingers returned, this time working to spread you open. His eyes finally shot up to yours, his desire evident, and there was an unspoken question in the gesture. More?
You would take all that he could give you, greedily. If he gave you scraps, you would take scraps with a thankful smile. If he gave you a goddamn meal, then you would savor every moment, every drop. With a shaky smile, you gave him a nod, not needing to use your words this time. 
The first graze of the toy over your clit made you jump, eliciting an amused shake of König’s head. “Relax, Schatz.”
And you tried. Taking a deep breath, you went through the breathing exercises you were taught when you first enlisted. Either it was thinking about the breathing exercises, or the exercises themselves, but you found yourself relaxing a bit, your muscles not as wound up as they once were. 
So when König once again pressed the vibrator against the bundle of nerves, you still jolted. Not out of shock, but because of the pleasure that action brought. And instead of pulling away like last time, he kept his hand in place, making you squirm. 
Soft whines and gasps of air were heard from you, hands fisting the sheets beside you. You wanted to hold on to him, but you were worried that once you grabbed on, you wouldn’t want to let go. “König…” you moaned, trying to express just how good he was making you feel. Every nerve in your body tingled, that unmistakable tightness growing in your abdomen. You weren’t close, but you didn’t think it would take long with how worked up you’d been waiting for him. 
The hand holding you open ascended, your back arching into his touch as he dragged his fingers over your stomach, your ribs, before encapsulating one of your breasts in a large, warm hand. “Du bist so schön,” he murmured, a glint of something in his eye. It quickly turned mischievous, though, when you just nodded along, his words meaning nothing to you. “Du hast keine Idee, was ich sage.”
When you neither confirmed nor denied his observation, he laughed, much to your confusion, but you were too caught up in your pleasure to care much. “Oh, Schatz.” It almost sounded patronizing, something that shouldn’t have gotten you as worked up as it did. Another plea of his name tore from your lips, the pressure in you building and building. 
Glancing down between your legs, you were surprised to find his eyes already on you. A squeeze of his hand had you keening, König making a noise that almost seemed proud. “So responsive. Nur für mich.”
What could you do besides nod? Even if you could understand him, you doubted you’d be able to process his words. And besides, hearing him speak his native tongue was always a treat, so hearing him like this was melting you, another thing setting your body alight. Your thighs were beginning to shake, something that did not go unnoticed by the man between them. 
“König… fuck, just a lil’ more…” You failed to see the plan he was formulating, your eyes screwed shut as pleasure overtook you. That tension was becoming unbearable now, and just on the verge of snapping. Your hips rocked and twisted, your fingers cramping with how hard you were gripping the sheets. You were on the edge, just teetering. All you needed was a little push, and-
The sound of silence was deafening as König turned the toy off, setting it on the bed beside you. Your eyes flew open, nowhere near expecting him to pull away just as you were about to cum. It would’ve been embarrassing, the frustrated noise you let out, but all you could think and feel was your waning orgasm. You went to try and finish yourself, but a strong hand caught your wrist before you could move. 
“König…” you warned, pleaded. Like sand, you could feel your release escaping through your fingers. “Y-You said you would help me relax.”
“You are distracted, nein?” 
It was true, your mind was far from the stresses of the day. But a new stress was building, one that was being caused by him. “König-”
“Lay back down.”
You hadn’t even realized you’d sat up, and with a sigh, you sunk back against the pillows, hoping he didn’t see the way your cheeks darkened at the way he commanded you. You could feel yourself continue to come down from that delicious high, body still strung tight like a string on a violin. König played you so well, that you doubted it would take long for you to reach that precipice again. But would he give you what you wanted, or continue to dangle it above your head, just out of reach? You both loved and hated the game he was playing, but your patience was bound to run out eventually. 
He settled in between your legs again, both hands empty this time. A few minutes passed, König lazily tracing his fingers across your bare legs and stomach, truly letting the embers of your previous orgasm burn out.
After what felt like an eternity, he began to drag his touch inward, making you gasp lightly. Like he did before, you felt him pass his fingers through you. The stimulation was almost too much, but it was the best thing you’d ever felt, a soft whine leaving you. That whine turned into a moan when he pressed a digit into you, aided by your arousal. 
He wasted no time in working his finger in and out of you, setting a slow yet intense pace. Your previous decision to not hold on to him quickly fell apart, desperately reaching down to him. There was a second of surprise before he gave you his other hand, your fingers immediately locking with his. It was a startling difference, the innocent gesture of handholding versus the way he was making you see stars with every crook of his fingers. 
His fingers were wide, much wider than yours, so the stretch burned when he added a second. He gave you a moment to adjust before moving, murmuring soft words of praise. “Gutes Mädchen,” he purred. “Gott, look at you, taking me so well.” Each word was enunciated with a thrust of his fingers, pulling noises from you you didn’t even know were possible. 
As amazing as his fingers felt, you need more. Wanted more. Glancing down at König, you gave him as wide eyes as you could, and he seemed to get the message. “You want more?” Upon your fervent nodding, he shook his head teasingly. “So greedy.”
For a moment, you were convinced that he wasn’t going to fulfill your request. That was until he pulled his hand away from yours, reaching for the base of his mask. Your heart damn near stopped when you realized what he was doing, and with a shocked gasp, you shut your eyes, unsure if he wanted you to see. 
You felt him pause, the rustling of fabric ceasing, before his voice rang out. “Look at me.” For the first time since you’d met him, you’d heard his voice clearly, not muffled by his mask. 
Cautiously, you opened your eyes, still partially convinced that this was a test of sorts. All of those worries disappeared when your eyes landed on him. His mask wasn’t fully off, not like you expected, and a part of you was relieved. You don’t think you were ready for that. 
Instead, it was pulled up just past his mouth, revealing most of his lower face, and any image you’d created of him in your mind was immediately forgotten, replaced with the sight in front of you. He had a wider jaw, with a decent amount of stubble adorning his cheeks. His lips were full, the top smaller than the bottom, and pulled into a small smile that made your stomach erupt into butterflies. He was, without a doubt, one of the most handsome men you’d ever laid eyes on, and this was only a part of his face.
But what stuck out to you the most, and would stick out to anyone who saw him, was the large scar that cut upwards on the right side of his upper lip, disappearing under the mask as it continued. The rest of the skin had healed together, except for on his lip, where, similar to a cleft lip but smaller, there was a gap, exposing a sharp canine. It was like his lip was turned up in a constant sneer.
You had no idea how he got that scar, and knowing the job you both did, it was probably quite traumatic. But the scar, alongside the rest of him, had desire churning so strongly in your gut that you nearly felt ill. It felt almost too good to be true, yet here he was, in between your legs, staring at you like you were the best thing on this forsaken planet, his hips grinding against the bed as he pleasured you. 
“Hallo, Schatz.” You were entranced by the way his lips moved as he spoke, and he noticed it, a cocky grin now on display. God, the effect that smirk had on you was immediate, his smugness immeasurable when he felt your body react on his fingers. “You know how to make a man feel good.”
You managed to roll your eyes, not wanting to bolster his ego that much, making König laugh in response. But his playful mood was quickly replaced by one of pure desire, moving forward until you could feel his warm breath hit your center. His fingers had resumed their motions, that tension once again building in your abdomen. It felt stronger this time like your body was punishing you for not allowing the tension to release last time. 
Not once did his eyes break away from yours, not even as his tongue flicked out to taste you, and you could feel his smile, never once dropping. He did it again, this time nudging your over-sensitive clit, making your hips buck. Letting his mask fall on your body to keep it held up, his now free hand splayed across your lower abdomen, keeping you in place, unable to escape the onslaught of pleasure. 
Even quicker than before, you found yourself careening toward that edge, your nails digging into König’s arm, likely leaving marks. His name replayed like a chant on your lips with each crook of his fingers, each flick of his tongue, every suck from his lips. You couldn’t see him any longer, your head thrown back against the pillows.
“König… please.” You almost didn’t want to tell him you were close, afraid of him taking your release away from you again. But you figured he didn’t need you to tell him to know, with the way your thighs shook and walls fluttered around his fingers. You felt him smirk again, a sense of dread washing over you at its implication. “Please, König… let me cum.”
Forcing your head back down, you watched as he considered your plea, and for a second, you thought you were in the clear. That was until he pulled his mouth away, his lower face glistening, that smirk still there, before the mask fell back down. His fingers pulled away next, groaning when he watched you clench around nothing.
Frustrated was nowhere close to how you felt, tears now prickling your eyes as yet another orgasm was withheld. The torture was delicious, yes, but you were going to lose it if you didn’t get to cum soon. You’d wanted this for so long, to fall apart under his ministrations, and you were tired of waiting. Your voice wavered as you whined his name, but there wasn’t anything either of you could do now, as you felt that almost high fade away again. 
With a defeated sigh, you let your head hit the pillows again, your legs sliding off König’s shoulders. You didn’t get to relax long, though, before his accented voice hit your ears again, unfortunately muffled. “Roll over.”
Without trying to hide your displeasure, you complied, glaring at him as you turned. You hoped he couldn’t tell how excited you actually were, fighting back an eager smile. He chuckled from behind you as you settled on your hands and knees, trailing off when he took in the sight before him. “I will ignore that attitude. This time.”
As you thought over the implications of this time, you felt König stand, followed by the sound of rustling fabric, as well as the crinkle of plastic. Something stirred in you at the fact that he came prepared, meaning he wanted this as much as you did. You’re not sure why you still believed he didn’t, but the reassurance was nice, to say the least. 
Glancing over your shoulder, you managed to catch a glimpse of him, the sight making you nearly snap your head back around. Nearly. He had shed his pants, his black shirt rising enough to reveal a pale, muscular abdomen, created from years of intense labor and exercise. He radiated power, and a part of you wondered if that translated into more intimate aspects like his authoritativeness had. Would he be rough with you? Or would he be more ginger, like his touch had been for most of the night; not gentle, but not on the verge of hurting?
You would take either way, as long as it was him doing it. 
“It is rude to stare.”
His tone was teasing, yet it still pulled you out of your shameless ogling. Caught red-handed, an almost sheepish smile appeared on your face. “You can’t blame me when you look like that. You’re a sight, König.”
For the first time that night, König seemed at a loss for words, staring at you like you’d grown a second head. If his mask was still pulled up, you figured you would see his lips struggling to form words, and, if you were lucky, a blush creeping up his face. It was a beautiful image in your mind, one that made you smile harder. 
Clearing his throat, König shook himself out of whatever daze he had been in, and you pocketed his weakness away for later. Checking you for any last-second hesitations, he let the rest of the clothing on his lower body fall away, effectively shifting the power back into his hands. And despite yourself, a small noise left you at the sight, further stroking his already massive ego. 
As to be expected for someone of his size, he was large, and painfully hard, if the hiss he let out told you anything. He was proportional to his hand as he took himself in it, stroking himself a few times, but you knew you’d struggle to hold him in yours. Just like the rest of his body, he was pale, with an almost purple tip that leaked precum. 
Turning your head back around before you lost your nerve, a few seconds passed before you felt the bed creak again, assumedly to put on the condom. One hand pressed between your shoulders, wordlessly pressing your face and chest into the bed. His other hand grabbed your hip, pulling your ass against him, another small noise leaving you when his cock pressed into you. You let him maneuver you as he wished, surprised with how much you were enjoying him taking the lead during this. 
“Ready?” His voice sounded relaxed, but the fingers digging into your hips told a different story. Still, the sincerity of his gesture made your heart thrum happily.
“Yes.” You’d never been more ready for something. 
A strangled moan tore from your lips as he pressed in, obscured by the mattresses your face was currently being pressed into. Tangling your fingers into the sheets around you, you could do nothing but take him as he sheathed his length into you, inch by inch. Time seemed to slow, your breathing ragged, when it wasn’t interrupted by noises of pleasure. 
The pain wasn’t as bad as you initially thought it would be, and for a moment you were thankful that König had worked you up so much. But that tension returned again, König still not fully in you yet. A whimper of his name had him stilling, an almost painful-sounding breath leaving him as he steadied himself, using every ounce of restraint to keep going slowly. 
The words tumbled out of you then, unable to stop yourself. “I-I can take it… please.”
“Scheiße.” The expletive was not unknown to you, nearly turning smug with the fact you made him lose control again. And just like before, he was quick to put you in your place, any comment dying on your lips when he bottomed out with a sharp thrust of his hips.
You swore you saw stars, unable to make any noise besides a soft oh. König, trusting that you were telling the truth, didn’t wait to give you time to adjust. He set a brutal pace immediately, hips snapping against yours with a slick noise. You could cum just from this alone, still so worked up, and König knew this.
The hands on your body shifted, wrapping around the front of your body and lifting you effortlessly until your back was pressed against his chest. He wasted no time tearing off your shirt, groping and toying with your breasts as he continued to thrust up into you. His voice was like gravel as he spoke, his covered mouth speaking right in your ear. “Du fühlst- Gott, mein Schatz.”
Even though your brain was hazed with lust, there was one thing that stuck out to you when he spoke. Never before had he added the word “mein” before calling you Schatz. You had no idea what it meant, but it certainly sounded like an English word you’d been dying to hear from his lips. Mine.
“Yours?” You knew you were probably connecting dots that didn’t exist, but the idea of being König’s was too appealing. 
König stuttered in his movements, an absolutely sinful moan being pulled from him, a sound that nearly pushed you over that edge. “Smart girl,” he spoke while regaining his breath. “Cum for me, mein Mädchen.”
That was all you needed, reaching your release the hardest you’d ever had in your life, the relief you felt immeasurable. Your head threw back to his shoulder, and because your eyes were screwed shut you couldn’t see the way he stared at you with awe. Every muscle tensed and then released, causing you to go slack in his arms, your nerves buzzing with pleasure. 
Your ears rang too loudly to hear him groan your name as he felt you cum, and a few more thrusts of his hips was all it took to reach his own end. The sensation of him spasming inside of you rode out your waves of pleasure until it became too much. König, thankfully, seemed to realize this, and he pulled out of you, then easing your limp body to the bed carefully. 
Completely blissed out, you didn’t feel as König got off the bed, nor know how much time passed before he returned. All you knew was that suddenly the blanket was torn out from under you, before covering your bare body.
Even though every muscle in your body didn’t want to work, you forced yourself to sit upright and watch the large man, who was currently in the process of getting redressed. “You’re not staying?” You didn’t try to hide the obvious disappointment in your words. 
König stilled at that, turning to face you slowly. “Do you want me to stay?”
“Of course.” The words came out so easily, so honestly, that you nearly startled yourself with your honesty. 
Something like relief sagged his broad shoulders, and before long he was back beside your bed. You let him lay down first, as he did take up more space, before settling yourself in the crook of his arm. Well, it was more like you were half lying on top of him to keep from falling off the bed, but neither of you were complaining. König certainly wasn’t, his eyes crinkling in a poorly concealed smile. 
A few moments passed in silence, simply savoring the afterglow and the feeling of being in each other’s arms. Then, “Are you relaxed now?”
You snorted at that, lifting your head to look at him, shaking your head lightly. Fondly. “I suppose I am,” you agreed. “Though I am gonna be sore tomorrow for… other reasons.”
It was König’s turn to laugh now, the sound lighter than you expected. “I hope you are not expecting me to apologize. You were the one who asked for it.” You merely shrugged your shoulders in response, knowing he was right, but not wanting to give him the satisfaction of verbally admitting it. 
Every part of your body wanted to lay back down, but you had a different idea as you continued to observe König. He tracked every movement of your eyes, and you could see his brow furrow in confusion. Before he could say anything, though, you were speaking, so quietly you wondered if you had merely thought the words.
“Can I kiss you?”
And for the second time that night, König was at a loss, blinking at you like a deer in the headlights. But it seemed he’d already made up his mind, nodding lightly, the mask creasing with every movement of his head. 
Letting the blanket fall off you, you were quick to straddle his abdomen, eliciting a gasp from the Austrian. Tentatively, you let your fingers reach for the hem of the mask, scanning his eyes for any hesitations. When you were met with none, you flashed him a gracious smile, before pulling the cloth up right to his nose, not going further than he had before. 
His hands, which had fallen to his side, now ran up your thighs, before settling on your waist. Blue eyes danced across your face and your body, not able to decide which sight he liked better. You were quick to keep his attention on your mouth, though, as you planted one of your hands on his chest and leaned forward.
Taking your other hand, you let it trail up his neck before settling on his lower jaw, his stubble tickling your hand. He shuddered under your touch, lips parting in a soft gasp. Even with everything the two of you had done tonight, this felt the most intimate. 
When you pressed your lips against his, you couldn’t help the smile that tugged yours when he made another audible noise. A part of you wondered how long it had been since he’d been kissed, been touched this softly. If he’d let you, you’d remedy that. Gladly.
You kept the kiss short, but it promised more to come. Setting the mask back down, you pressed one last peck to his covered lips, unable to help yourself, before laying your head on his chest, keeping any comment about his fast heartbeat to yourself. “I hope you know I’ll be getting my revenge,” you said instead, hoping he didn’t realize it was just another way of saying you wanted this again. 
“I am looking forward to it, Schatz.”
Translations:
Schatz - treasure (term of endearment)
Sehr gut - very good
Gott - God
Du bist so schön - you are so beautiful
Du hast keine Idee, was ich sage - you have no idea what I am saying
Nur für mich - only for me
Nein - no
Gutes Mädchen - good girl
Scheiße - shit, fuck
Du fühlst- Gott, mein Schatz - you feel- God, my treasure
Mein Mädchen - my girl
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be-side-my-self · 6 months ago
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Rewatch of ONLY Murders In The Building to prepare for season 4 (V)
<Part I> // <Part II> // <Part III> // <Part IIII>
Block #OMITBRewatch if you don’t want to read notes that will have spoilers up to seasons 3. Just to make it clear, while quoting, I use M, O, C for the main characters.
Also I’m putting this under a read more because it gets long. (also, also this is the fifth part and I finally added "only" to the title.)
S2 E7
Episode of Mabel.
There is Theo and that is a really nice apartment.
M: "Is that me? Did I stab someone? Again?"
Detective Williams baby is so cute! Keith.
Mabel: "Nice accesory." Theo: *Looks down at his ankle* Mabel: "You steal jewelery from dead people, and the state gives you and anklet. Kind of poetic." Theo: *slams the mug, pissed off.*
THEO DIMAS I'm deaf. I write, or use ASL _I catch only 1/3 of what you say,_ through lip-reading.
*insert that video from american psycho about the business cards.
Theo: "When you got off the train, you were in shock so I took you to my place like creep."
Theo is really nice.
Detective Williams is so great.
.... they are so stupid it's amazing... but also that apartment is poorly soundproofed
Talking about a two-men job on the toilet is a really weird thing to say.
M: "Ah, yes. The adventures of a teenage grave robber. Got it."
Theo likes the simple solutions. Nice.
Someone with frustration is playing Whak-a-mole
Crane game... my sister is so good at it. Better than Theo.
So, how did he manage to get the ring in the crane-game? Sleight of hand? He could have put it in there when Mable did not look.
Oliver probably has probably flash-back to the time Will was a baby.
The dads are consulting.
Oh Mabel :(
Of course she is angry, her dad is dying and he can't keep his promises and she does not know.
Uh oh... glitter.
That is such a good scene.
So, the background on Mable's phone... is that her fursona?
Omg... please... I know you need to look at the lips Theo, but please look at the street.
M: "Thank you for stealing my fish."
Oh right! A blackout!
S2 E8
Sith-Avenue Slasher
Something about this was correct...
Also love the fan-made merch. All the tie-die stuff.
You always get Oliver with dips.
Howard! Go for it!!
Psycharatist: "There may be more to life than cats."
... lmao Charles and Oliver bonding over the guy who operated their knees. Besties.
Howard: "Sevenlyn Marie Morris, num num!"
Smooth, Howard!
It's actually nice to see some side-characters in that episode...
Howard and that other guy are a match made in heaven... pity it does not last :/
Also the scene with Nina and the door-man is really good.
Oh... the whole house singing sound of silence. That is such a nice scene.
:(
Mabel takes the dips with her!
lmao everyone getting drunk in the lobby XD
M: "But why are you here? Other than interrogating teenage girls? Detective Kreps: "That's just one part of the job I happen to like."
YIKES YIKES YIKES
The GLITTER!!
S2 E9
Rose Cooper and Leonora Folger are the same person iirc.
Well the alimony is probably partly your fault, Kreps.
Kreps: "And she, or he, if that is your thing, they smile at you, and your whole goddamn universe turns upside down. And that's when shit gets really crazy."
M: "That is ASL for glitter." C: "Oh, that is kind of fun."
Congrats Oliver! You are the father!
O: "There's no real difference. All the European countries are esentially the same."
... boy.
Hey, Alice!
As I said, I did not like Alice but this is really tragic. It would have been nice for Mabel to have an artist as a girlfriend.
Oh lol... Rose just acted like she was Leonora.
And... now I think I remember that Oliver is lying about being greek... but it's a white lie?
25 Willow Dr Lake Placid New York
"Excessive Force Fighting Gym" ... that sounds fun and not serious at all. But gosh the upcoming scene is so good.
Hey, Teddy!
Lmao... Oliver just going for Teddy's throat.
O: "You're my son's father, you piece of shit!"
Kreps: "If I'm so stupid, how come I was able to land the smartes woman on the planet?"
It they weren't murderers their story would have been kinda cute.
Teddy: "Ow!" O: "Can I get you something!? Coffee? Water? A swift kick in the dick?" Teddy: "Look, Oliver, let me explain--" O: "Oh no, no, no. You know you don't have to. I was up all night talking to Roberta. She told me what happened." Teddy: "Did she tell you it only happened once?" O: "She said twice." Teddy: "One night, two times." O: "Well, now you're just bragging."
Mabel figures it out but comes to the wrong conclusion... I mean I would too.
Teddy's whole family was a bunch of crooks.
Teddy: "Aren't we square at this point? You send me to jail, I fuck your wife?"
Well, shit.
S2 E10
I remember that I really enjoyed the episode.
Poppy really had a shitty life.
The Mayor... yikes, yikes, yikes...
Cinda is such a bitch.
O: "Torture? Can we torture her? Charles, get your concertina and whatever you consider your 10 most intersting stories." C *rubbing his nose with his middle finger*: "Hm, let me just muse on that, uh, for a second." O *smirks*: "Mm."
No, Oliver it does not feel like a finale yet... but at least we got to see Poppy's background story.
M: "Oliver, what did we agree on?" O: "You and Charles do the talking."
I know people who are disgusted by the inside of the tomatoe but also someone who gets an allergic reaction when eating unprocessed tomatoes. I on the other hand can eat a tomatoe like an apple. And I enjoy it.
Liverwurst? Yum. Marmelade? Yum. Togther? ... nonono
Uma is great.
Lester's (Doorman) story is hardcore.
Oliver is so fast with giving away Charles' money.
O: "The sexual energy between you two was obvious. I'd say more, but this is a family murder podcast."
Charles and Oliver doing slow motion is so hilarious.
Don't waste food.
... love how Mabel ist using the ego of Poppy to confess.
Holy shit what a scene.
I remember the first time I saw that I was so freaked out.
And the fact that Cinda is now complimenting Mabel...
Again... if they weren't murderers, I would have wished Krebs and Poppy all the best.
C: "Hallelujah! It's a miracle cure!" Lucy: "Nice. you got de-dementia'd."
LMAO... How Charles tries his best to ask out Joy and luckily she understands his grunts.
Pity, that the mural is painted over.
Also it seems like Mabel and Alice stayed friends at least. Maybe dated some longer, who knows?
Awww... Will and Oliver having a moment.
I screamed when I saw Paul Rudd in that role.
But like what kind of ass do you have to be to get on the bad side of Charles?
*dramatic yodeling*
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dontmindme2600 · 2 years ago
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Things that have happened to in Fallout 3 so far as I go into the game not knowing anything at all about it, part 3 (part two is in the reblogs of the og post I just don’t want to make it any longer lol):
-Game just straight up crashed randomly (love u Bethesda) but thankfully it was like soon after I turned it on so I didn’t really lose anything important. What was weird though is that after closing it and reopening it, it was still crashing. Like it just froze with glitched audio on the title screen. Also somehow when I tried to open a whole other game to give it a break the glitching sound continued over to a whole other goddamn game for some reason. I am using past tense here but I actively write this stuff as it happens (I have this post drafted) and literally have no idea what to do rn because I’m playing on Xbox GamePass and like wha (I’ll figure it out)
-I found the mechanist and tried to do that speech thing on him where you try to tell him he’s become just as big of a problem as the AntAgonizer, the first time it didn’t work and he killed me. The second time it immediately worked, and after like 3 lines of dialogue he took the suit off and I completed the entire quest. Like. Like the whole thing. What the fuck. I don’t even know what the AntAgonizer looks like yet. I was. I was expecting a little more there
-Was hanging out in the Rivet city marketplace for the first time, got some pre-war clothes, gossiped with some NPC’s, all of sudden one of them starts running and I’m getting shot at, I leave and come back and everything’s normal, don’t know what that was about but I LIVED THIS TIME THOUGH HA
-Was going through hell in DC as you do and started repeatedly clipping through the ground with every step I took, had to reload a save to get it back to normal
-Whatever you do, do not take a left after you discover Friendship Heights
-Found an area that was full of raiders to practice my combat and the raiders just like. Hung a bunch of dismembered bodies from the ceiling of one room and I will not lie I was a bit aghast. Appalled if you would. Flabbergasted. Like have some class???
-Made it to the underworld, I’m considering killing Ahzrukhal to learn more about Charon without having to pay, but the people there already probably don’t trust me and I don’t want them to become hostile because I killed him lmao
-Found a glitched like,,, floating armor I think??? It was just a chest plate and mask floating in midair in some closed off area of an underground metro station, and I’m not joking it scared the shit out of me because it looked like a floating corpse staring straight at me alsjdhakksj. When I walked into it gravity kicked in and it fell to the ground, but when I went back into the same area again later it respawned, floating again.
-I’ve realized that there’s a counter for “pants exploded” in your stats and I am,,, very curious on when that will be a thing I can do
Notes:
-I still have absolutely NO idea how to use V.A.T.S. properly, so I avoid it, so I’m absolutely dogshit at any combat in the game. I kind of think that at this point I should probably work on it because I’m struggling to make any major progress with the quests. So I’ll make sure to practice sometime
-From now on I’ll tag these posts as “fo3 with Stupid” (the old ones are tagged with this as well)
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archived-kin · 4 years ago
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simeon with a himbo boyfriend
note from kin: once again i am writing for the boys because this fandom doesn’t have nearly enough content for them, especially for Big and Beefy Men. let them be in dating sim fandoms too!!!!!! give them more content!!!!!
anyway i’ve made you an angel since i don’t want to have to think about the deeper repercussions of what simeon dating a human would be (i mean we all know what happened to lilith when she tried it)
fandom: obey me!
character(s): male!reader, simeon, luke, belphegor, beelzebub, asmodeus, satan, leviathan, mammon, lucifer, barbatos, diavolo, solomon
pairing(s): simeon/reader but it accidentally becomes everyone/simeon’s boyfriend at some point whoops (this ended up as a pretty big block of text as a result so please let me know if you have difficulty reading it so that i can try to format it better!)
warning(s): nope!
genre: fluff!!!! fluff everywhere!!!!!!!!!
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simeon thinks you’re the cutest goddamn thing in all three realms
you may be six foot four inches of muscle but to him that is six foot four inches of ADORABLE
you’re very strong so he likes to just run and jump up at you from behind and wrap his arms around your neck because he knows you won’t be fazed by it (physically anyways, emotionally is another story)
the other angels always gasp when he does this in public because it’s so far from his usual ‘poised and elegant’ thing but how is simeon NOT supposed to climb all over you like a koala when you’re so big and huggable???
simeon just really loves jumping at you like that okay
because every time he does you’ll just pause for a second and look very confused as to why your back has suddenly gotten heavier, and then you’ll turn your head, and your smile and excited little ‘simeon!!’ is to DIE for
he has to be incredibly upfront with you about what he wants because otherwise you will not understand
he has to say, word for word, “i want to sleep in the same bed as you every day” before you actually realise that that’s what he meant
the whole exchange kind of went like this:
simeon, being sappy at like seven in the morning: “i want to wake up like this all the time from now on”
you: “??? do you want me to come lie down next to you before you wake up tomorrow morning?”
simeon: “no, for the whole night”
you: “you want to wake up like this for the whole night??”
simeon: [sighs]
he also often has to be the one taking charge when it comes to physical affection  
like you’re always willing to give him hugs and carry him around and let him sleep sprawled out on your chest like a starfish and give him kisses but half the time simeon has to ask you because for some reason you just won’t do it on your own???
at one point simeon starts getting a little insecure that you don’t actually really like physical affection and are just going along with it for him
because he’s a sensible angel, he brings this up with you before jumping to conclusions
he was not prepared for you to reply that you always wait for him to confirm that he wants affection because you’re afraid that you’ll accidentally hurt him with your strength if you go for it by yourself
simeon doesn’t cry a lot but dear god did he come close that day
after that it’s just hand holding and hugs and forehead kisses galore from you and simeon couldn’t be happier
now, it’s time for a bit of backstory
you were created purely to fight during the big celestial war, which is why you are so Beefy and Stupid
the beefy is because they needed you to be both strong and intimidating, while the stupid is because they didn’t create you with anything but fist fighting in mind
during the war you were a force to be reckoned with because you could just run at and headbutt a demon and they’d immediately be flung straight out of the skies and back into the devildom
and, even better, this meant that you didn’t have to kill anyone! you could just punt them so hard that they’d be flung out of the realm where the battle’s taking place entirely
once the war was over though they didn’t really know what to do with you
you were basically just this giant baby who didn’t know how to do anything but war
so they just dumped you in a garden and told you to take care of the flowers
which was how simeon originally met you! he was taking a walk around the gardens and saw you crying over a tree that you accidentally snapped in half with your big clumsy hands
now, simeon wasn’t one to believe in love at first sight, but HOLY FUCK
if he hadn’t already been an angel in the celestial realm he’d have thought you were some divine being from the heavens
anyway long story short simeon consoled you and started helping you take care of the garden, taught you how to live a life in times of peace, spent entire nights just lying awake and thinking about your smile and your laugh and how warm your hands look to hold and how it would feel to hug you, and finally managed to confess to you without you misconstruing it as just a Friendly Act of Kindness, and now you two are the proud holders of the title Cutest Couple in The Universe
granted only asmo calls you two that but you’ll take it
speaking of asmo allow me to segue this to the rad exchange programme era
you get so sad when simeon tells you he’ll have to leave for a year
your face falls when he breaks the news and your voice is all lost and quiet when you ask, ‘does that mean i can’t see you?’
simeon is absolutely devastated
it’s like a thousand puppies and kittens are being murdered right in front of him
he nearly cries (when i say nearly i mean he does)
but he can’t back out of the exchange program now, and one year isn’t THAT much for beings that live for possibly forever, so in the end, giving you a giant hug and about a million kisses to make up for the ones you’ll miss over the coming year, simeon leaves for the devildom
he makes it about a month and a half without you before he starts getting all mopey
and you’re not doing much better up in the celestial realm
michael actually has to message simeon and ask him how to deal with you because you spend every day dejectedly shuffling around the gardens that you take care of and it’s making everyone sad just looking at you
simeon reads that message and immediately decides that either he’s going back to the celestial realm or you’re coming down to the devildom
the authorities are a little cautious about it because you’re one of the purest angels they have and they really don’t want you getting corrupted by demons
but simeon assures them that the few demons that you’ll actually be having contact with wouldn’t do that, and you’ll be under both his and lord diavolo’s protection
so you end up being allowed to join simeon in the devildom for his exchange year!!!
honestly with the way the two of you react when you see each other again you’d think you hadn’t seen each other in years
simeon runs up to you and jumps straight into your arms and you spin him around in a big hug and ahhhhhhhh it’s like a teen romance movie but with an actually compelling relationship
and so you move into his bedroom (because of course you’re still going to share one down here) and take up a temporary position as a gardener to take up time since you can’t really do school
pros: simeon now gets to see you every day again and you look very cute bustling around the devildom’s fancy gardens with a watering can and wheelbarrow. also he gets to watch you lift an entire shed and it’s the best thing he’s ever seen
cons: the others are all basically in love with you now as well
simeon’s torn between ‘why wouldn’t they be, he’s literally the most perfect being ever’ and ‘what the fuck, that’s MY boyfriend’
belphie likes you because you are similar to beel and you’re also warm and big and strong so he can take naps on you and you won’t be bothered in the slightest
one day simeon sees belphie just jump onto your back and start sleeping there while you’re crouched in the garden doing some weeding and he’s so stunned by the sheer audacity that he forgets to be mad about it
honestly you don’t really notice that belphie is sleeping on you until you go to get up and feel something move on your back
and then, being the dumb precious idiot you are, you just lie face first there on the lawn so that he can carry on sleeping without being disturbed
consequence: simeon nearly cries at your sweetness but is also incredibly jealous and belphie is now having Feelings that he didn’t sign up for
beel meanwhile isn’t sure how to feel about you at first because he kind of feels like you’re stealing his twin all the time, but then you make him your special candied fruits (from produce that you grew yourself) and he loves you from that point forward
also PLEASE share your workout routine with him he wants to know your secret
it turns out that you don’t really have a workout routine?? you were just made like that
though the constant exercise and heavy lifting and stuff you do as part of your daily garden-care routine (you take care of basically all of the gardens back in the celestial realm) helps as well
he’s a bit disappointed but he does like that you can pick him up without any effort
one time he asked if you were capable of it and without missing a beat you went ‘let’s find out!’ and straight up swept him off his feet
beel was fucking screaming on the inside but no can’t feel feelings that’s simeon’s boyfriend
meanwhile asmo… okay we all know the way asmo is
boy took one look at you and immediately started drooling (figuratively anyway. physically his jaw just dropped)
kudos to him though, he backs off with the flirting as soon as simeon informs everyone that you’re his partner
asmo may be the avatar of lust but he is no home wrecker (he still finds an excuse to hug you every time he sees you though because awooga, muscles)
(he does know his boundaries so simeon doesn’t mind too much)
asmo also very likes the fact that you have such a green thumb because it means you can grow the prettiest flowers and you’re always willing to trim him a few to use as accessories
at some point simeon accidentally eavesdrops in on a conversation between the two of you where you’re just gushing about what kind of flowers he likes and how you’re going to plant them everywhere in the devildom because you like it when he smiles when he sees them
CRITICAL HIT!!!!!
simeon is pretty sure he combusts on the spot, while asmo is just squealing
thus was the origin of the title ‘Cutest Couple in the Universe’
satan on the other hand is mostly disinterested in you at first
the two of you live in pretty different worlds even if you live within the a five minutes’ walk of each other. he prefers to stay locked up in his room or the library and just curl up with a good book or ten for hours on end, while you’re always outside, digging flower beds and pruning bushes and cleaning fences and walls and basically doing every other little bit of manual labour that none of the brothers could be bothered to do before
he does note that you’re pretty good at what you do but that’s about it
until one day
you’re just pottering about in the garden outside the house of lamentation doing your angelic gardener thing when the stray cat that satan’s secretly been feeding for the past month or so comes by for its usual afternoon meal
satan has the window overlooking the garden so he quickly spots its ginger fur as well as you staring directly at it, and he immediately panics because what if you scare it away with your intimidating stature???
(yes, part of the reason satan doesn’t acknowledge you before this is because he was kind of scared of you and your muscles that he heard could punt beings out of entire realms back in your hey-day)
so he quickly dumps his book (though not without carefully bookmarking his place first) and rushes down to the garden in hopes of salvaging the situation, only to find you lying face first on the grass once again, though this time it’s not his little brother on your back
it’s the cat, who is purring like a little motor and aggressively kneading its paws against your back
satan can’t even see your face in this moment but he still basically gets cupid-shot in the heart because this is the cutest thing he’s ever seen
he has to force himself to calm down for a bit before he approaches lest he get overexcited and accidentally incur simeon’s wrath in the process
anyway after that satan makes a beeline for you every time he sees you and learns that you are an Absolute Idiot, but it just makes him like you even more
if satan was intimidated by you at first though, levi is downright terrified
you look like you could snap him in half with a single punch
he doesn’t try to talk to you at all for the first few weeks because how could he possibly find common ground to talk to you about?? you probably hunt dragons and eat rocks or something in your spare time
it isn’t until satan brings you up one day and mentions that you are incredibly dumb of the ass and probably couldn’t hurt a fly even if you tried that levi even entertains the idea of befriending you
he’s still not making the first move though
but it turns out that he doesn’t have to! one day you just show up at his bedroom door holding a giant crate of his latest akuzon haul
turns it got dropped off at the local post office after traffic problems and you volunteered to go pick it up and bring it back
anyway levi thanks you and starts unpacking his stuff, expecting you to leave in silence, but then he looks over and sees you just standing in front of his tv and staring at it
he’d been playing some battle platformer to pass the time before you showed up, and while levi himself doesn’t consider it particularly remarkable, you’re absolutely fascinated
being a gardener in the celestial realm you’ve never really had experience with this kind of thing, and you’re even more tech-illiterate than simeon, so what you’re seeing is basically like magic to you
so levi takes it upon himself to teach you as much about the art of gaming as he can in the short span of the next four hours before simeon gets home from a meeting of some kind and you inevitably immediately run off to greet him
you learn the basics relatively quickly but you’re still pretty awful at it
levi loses count of the amount of times you’ve accidentally run right off the end of the platform and fallen to your death once it reaches thirty two
it’s pretty much the most he’s laughed in, like, forever
congratulations! you have gained a new member in your party! levi will now follow you to the ends of the earth because you are the first person he feels like he can just be totally at ease around without being judged at all and just have fun with
(once, after you leave another gaming session to go cuddle with your boyfriend in the garden, levi catches himself thinking that ‘it isn’t fair that simeon gets to date him’ and has to do some serious self assessment)
mammon meanwhile has none of the reverence for you that his brother does
the amount of times he’s tried to rope you into his money-making schemes (which never work because he fails to realise that you are incapable of doing anything malicious in the slightest) is honestly just embarrassing at this point
simeon has to step in more than a couple of times because honestly mammon could ask you for your wallet and you’d probably just give it to him without another thought
that being said your wallet wouldn’t be much use because you never have any money
you just don’t understand the concept of exchanging money for goods and/or services so you never see any need for it
that being said, simeon does give you some money every time you go out into town on your own because something will inevitably catch your eye and you’ll suddenly realise that you just cannot live without it
the thing is simeon spoils you ridiculously so he always gives you way more money than would be considered a reasonable allowance
which means all mammon has to do is tag along and ask you nicely and you’ll probably buy him anything he wants
he does this a couple of times but then stops because he actually starts feeling bad about it
something just doesn’t sit right with him when he’s walking around with a bunch of shiny new things you’ve bought him with money that was meant to be spent on you while the only thing you’ve bought of your own volition is a pack of chocolate lollipops shaped like rabbits to share with simeon and luke
he may be the demonic avatar of greed but even he has a line that he won’t cross
he makes up for it by buying you things instead
nothing too expensive (he’s still mammon after all), just little things like sweets or bulbs for flowers you haven’t tried planting yet or food colouring for you to use for your candied fruits
speaking of those candied fruits, guess who loves and would probably kill a man for them?
lucifer
man may not seem like it but he has a hell of a sweet tooth
there was a bit of tension between the two of you when you first met (well there was tension from lucifer anyway) because he’d never met you like he had simeon and luke and had no idea what you were like
plus he’d heard about how you’re everyone’s favourite now back in the celestial realm and the little piece of him that still misses his life as an angel is a little petty about it
but then he interacts with you more and he realises that that favouritism is absolutely deserved
he will not admit it but he has wondered what being carried by you would feel like on multiple occasions
figures out how to read you really well which isn’t much of an achievement when you wear every single feeling you have on your sleeve but it still brings him a bit of satisfaction when he notices something that simeon doesn’t
he may be a pridey mcprideface but he is willing to give up a bit of that pride by pretending he can’t carry something heavy so that he can watch you do it
simeon acts like he doesn’t notice this but he absolutely does and he doesn’t know if he should tease lucifer about it or whack him over the head with a newspaper for it
all that aside though, much like simeon,  lucifer also thinks you’re just the cutest
he comes across you building a pillow fortress in the middle of the house of lamentation’s living room one day and is understandably like “what are you doing in my house and what are you doing with those pillows”
you explain very seriously that satan asked you for help in an apparently pre-arranged pillow fight with mammon and that every warrior needs a well-protected base of operations and offer to show him all the optimised battle features somehow recreated from nothing but cushions and blankets and chairs 
lucifer’s heart goes d o k i  d o k i
he also has experience with Big and Dumb men from dealing with both beel and diavolo (when the three of you are together it’s just himbo3) so the stupid doesn’t bother him much
speaking of diavolo (wow i am nailing all of these transitions from character to character look at me go)
this man is basically just a grown up golden retriever boy and you are a big gentle st. bernard so the two of you get along like a house on fire
you’ve seen how much this man gushes about lucifer. now imagine that times a thousand
that is how he talks about you
honestly sometimes you’d think HE’S the one dating you
simeon would probably get defensive if he didn’t get so much whiplash from their conversations about you
diavolo: “i must say, i never would have pinned [name] as being your type”
simeon, ready to Fucking Brawl: “excuse me?”
diavolo: “though i don’t blame you, have you seen his page in that book about the celestial war? the illustration does his true beauty no justice, of course, but it’s enchanting in and of itself. to be honest i’d have loved to have seen him in action during the war, i imagine it would have been quite breath-taking to see”
simeon: “…what”
barbatos is usually just there in the background during half of these exchanges and he has to seriously stiffen up his poker face to resist just bursting into laughter
the other half of the time the conversation is just simeon and diavolo going back and forth gushing about you
barbatos honestly dislikes you a bit at first
not for any personal faults of your own! it’s just that all your garden work + your very forgetful mind means that you’re often tracking dirt everywhere
it doesn’t help that diavolo keeps inviting you over to the castle for tea and a chat and half the time you leave these big footprints on the floor and he wants to cry because he just spent four hours mopping that
he mentions it to diavolo in passing at one point, who then passes the message on to simeon
barbatos kind of gets concerned for himself because he knows simeon does not take well to you being insulted (one time a demon at the r.a.d. called you an ‘unintelligent buffoon’ and he was ready to start a fist fight right then and there)
not that it was an insult, but you never know how love can blind you to reason
but simeon just assures him not to worry and tells you to remember to clean your shoes as well as changing clothes after doing some gardening
normally you’d forget being told these things within a few hours but simeon offers to give you a kiss every time you remember to do this so now you remember every single time you’re about to enter a building after doing some gardening
after that barbatos holds no ill will to you at all
he teaches you how to bake and is honestly so endeared by how clumsy you get in the kitchen
you knock an entire container of salt into the cake mix by accident because your hands are too big and you moved too fast and barbatos is just like 🥺
he low-key babies you even though he’s like an entire two heads shorter than you
you don’t mind though because getting babied by barbatos means you get given all sorts of cakes and sweets all the time
simeon isn’t sure how to feel about it but it doesn’t seem to be the patronising kind of babying (it’s more of an affectionate doting) so he lets it happen
what he doesn’t let happen is solomon’s relentless attempts to feed you his food
you are both too dumb and too nice to realise just how bad his cooking is, but simeon knows you have a sensitive stomach and are actually a pretty fussy eater - you just tend to stay quiet when something isn’t to your liking because you don’t want to complain
having had a sample of solomon’s food himself in the past, he knows that you’ll probably get sick eating it, and he doesn’t want you to be uncomfy so he refuses to let you try even a bite
it’s like he has a radar in his head that goes off every time solomon approaches you will a bowl of ‘noodle soup’ that looks more like something he’s fished out of a nuclear waste tank
solomon, when he’s not trying to indirectly poison you, is probably the guy you spend the most time with apart from simeon and luke
he’ll just hang around nearby with a spell book while you do your gardening and show you some neat little magic tricks every now and then
he tries to help with the gardening but he’s not exactly physically strong and he nearly breaks his back trying to lift a giant bag of compost
so he decides it’s probably better for him to just watch from afar
kind of wants to conduct an experiment to see just how much weight you can lift before you start getting tired
one time he sees you cut down a whole tree with one hard swat of your hand and just walk off carrying it over your shoulder and he has to take several deep breaths
luke knew you already, so not much changes while you’re in the devildom
he really wants to learn to make candied fruits the same way you do but he can never get the hang of boiling the sugar mixture to the right heat and consistency (plus he’s kind of scared of how hot it gets)
you like to just carry him around on your shoulders and while luke would normally bristle at being treated like a child, you act like this with nearly everyone
(once he sees you running around the garden with diavolo of all people perched on your shoulders, arms raised in the air like he’s on a rollercoaster ride, and he nearly passes out on the spot)
he seriously adores you and acts like a guard dog whenever he feels like any of the others are trying to take advantage of your dim-witted naïveté because NO demons are allowed to harm his big brother like that
he will also chase them off with a stick if he has to if they get too close because no being is allowed to even remotely try to disrupt your relationship with simeon 
simeon himself is no fool, and he’s well aware of the effect you have on pretty much everyone you come across, but he trusts them because they’re his friends
besides (and he isn’t being cocky or anything), it’s not like the relationship you have with them even holds a candle to what you have with him
they’ve all known you for less than a year, he’s loved you for nearly two millennia
they might be allowed take naps on your back while you work or be carried about on your shoulders, but do they get to spend every night snuggled up in your arms, feeling your chest rise and fall with every breath you take? no, he doesn’t think so
in conclusion: one day himbos like you will probably take over the world with their big muscles and unwavering loyalty and clueless grins that could make anyone’s heart skip a beat, and simeon’s pretty sure he’d be okay with it
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dreamwritesimagines · 2 years ago
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It’s CMA-
Btw I took notes as I went through the chapter which is why these are kind of progressing with the story
When I saw the title I squealed istg I’m so excited. Just the mention of carnivorous plants and I’m super pumped Lmao okay imma read it now
Anthony when he learns about Josie/meets her: fuck no there’s more clovers
Colin when he meets Josie: fuck yes there’s more clovers
Anthony is going to have a fucking aneurysm and Colin is going to be having the time of his life (besides the whole marina thing)
Damn Eloise is going to be so pissed about all of them getting engaged and married in one season, besides Colin (sort of). She’s going to think it’s hilarious until she realizes that oh fuck she’s next. Instead of having years to herself, now she’s next on mama bridgerton’s hit list of trying to find her love and she’s got no shields.
“ “It’s not the emotional aspect,” you cut her off. “It’s physical.” “
Wait is she implying to her sister that she wants to hate fuck Benedict??? lmfaooo clover giving mixed signals about her sexuality with this and the fuck buddy thing with Benedict lmfaooo
““Which wasn’t a lie at all.”” Wait did clover just admit that she truly wants to fuck him and that’s not part of the ruse??? Wait what if she’s going to be one of those people who sees themselves as/thinks they’re going to be enemies to hate fuck buddies (to lovers) LMFAOOOO
WAIT enemies to fake relationship to hate fuck buddies (to lovers). Wow love that lmao
OH MY GOD she’s misinterpreting the physical signs of her deprivation of romantic/emotional intimacy as a sign she wants to fuck him……. She’s touch starved af and she thinks she’s just horny……….
She realized that he makes her happy fucking finally oh my god clover. She is so emotionally repressed that she makes me look like the fucking pinnacle of mental health.
(Sorry I just realized I’m swearing so much and I don’t know why. I think it’s just because I care too much lollllllll. Let me know if I need to tone it down)
Oh my god she thinks she’s happy around him because he makes her horny istg this woman……… when she finally realizes….. I hope she keeps a journal so she can look back and laugh at her own dumbassery.
Andrew and Bess immediately approving and Andrew lowkey wanting to fuck benedict is genuinely the funniest possible response they could’ve had. Let’s be real Andrew is low key going to flirt with Ben and Ben is going to be like ‘is he hitting on me??????’ But then they both have too much respect for clover so maybe not. But also them having a harmless flirtationship would be so funny. But it would hurt clovers feelings…… I’m so torn
““Besides you could charm a goddamn rock apparently, you’ll be fine.” He repressed a proud grin. “
Stooooop they’re so cute what the fuck
Side note but I totally thought that Bess and Andrew and Josie lived in Scotland lmfao and I definitely mentioned that in the gretna greene ask which in hindsight does not make sense lmfaooo. But I guess Josie and co could still give Anthony a hard time and everything since they’ll be in London.
Also with all the scandals this season Josie is going to be like ‘I can’t believe you married into this family they’re messier than Andrew and that’s saying something’ lolololol
Andrew strikes me as a himbo I’m just going to say that. And Bess kind of seems like lesbian Charlie.
Okay I’m sure I will have more thoughts but I need to get ready for my day lolololol *terminator voice* I’LL BE BACK (I think it’s terminator I could have that wrong tho I’m not good with older movies)
CMA MY LOVE HIIII! ❤️
I love notes! 🥰
Yessss and fun fact, sundews symbolize "surprise" in language of flowers! ❤️ And I also kind of thought it'd be fun to have two carnivorous plants for the two sisters; sundew for Josie, Venus Flytrap for Clover! 🥰
Lolll you're absolutely right, Anthony and Colin will have very different reactions to Josie 😂 Especially considering Josie will not like Anthony at all....😈
Oh yeah, this season will be full of scandals and romance for so many of them 😏 And Eloise will so whine about it to Clover 😁
Clover totally admitted that yes! 😂 "enemies to fake relationship to hate fuck buddies (to lovers)" sounds about right 😏 I actually have this idea for Clover to propose a "friends with benefits" type of deal before she acknowledges her feelings but I'm not sure yet 😁
She is going to be so confused about the emotional and the physical aspect of their relationship😂
Oh no worries darling, I don't mind you swearing 😂
Andrew and Bess instantly liked Benedict but Josie still needs some time to get there 😂 Omg Andrew flirting with Benedict?! 😱❤️
Aw no they lived in Spain love! At least for a while ❤️ They loved travelling around 🥰
Andrew as a himbo omg I love this, he's so hilarious and amazing 😂❤️ I think he and Benedict will get along really well because Benedict is a himbo as well😂
Thank you so much for this my darling! ❤️❤️ ILYSM!❤️
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atimefordragons · 3 years ago
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HE'S SO OBSESSED WITH ME, AND BOY I UNDERSTAND
☾♔; June 8, 2022 ☾♔; 6:32pm ☾♔; sotd: River - Ochman ☾♔; cotd: Kamala Khan ☾♔; Boyfriend Material ☾♔; High Fashion Layout (I Guess)
𝐓𝐢𝐭𝐥𝐞: yeah, the title is a lie, I'm the one who's obsessed. lyrics from Taylor's "I Think He knows"
literally had to make a fucking template in photoshop, and it still took forever! at least this set is better than the celene and andreas one. yikes.
side note, this form was such a fun dive, because I never really think about what my characters want in like a romantic partner, or even a friend, I sort of design them to be what I like in relationship dynamics and think how they should be. so this was fun to try and expand my thinking.  
𝗕𝗢𝗬𝗙𝗥𝗜𝗘𝗡𝗗 𝗠𝗔𝗧𝗘𝗥𝗜𝗔𝗟 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗡𝗗 𝗜: 𝗜𝗡𝗧𝗥𝗢𝗗𝗨𝗖𝗘 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥 𝗖𝗢𝗨𝗣𝗟𝗘 urstyle.fashion/contest/5974-introduce-your-couple
𝗬𝗢𝗨
𝗡𝗔𝗠𝗘: Alexis de Angelis
𝗔𝗚𝗘: 26
𝗟𝗶𝗸𝗲𝘀: a song of ice and fire, daenerys targaryen, dragons, winter, blizzards, maple syrup, the raptors (go raptors go), tolkien, dostoyevsky, tolstoy, history, cities, cars, driving, astronomy, space, the moon, disney, lilo & stitch, anime (big time nerd), sci-fi, fantasy, EUROVISION, peonies, rose gold, blue, pink, purple, sailor moon, the mandalorian and ONLY the mandalorian, the rest of star wars does not exist.
𝗗𝗶𝘀𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲𝘀: americans, anti-dany's, stansa's (not sansa stark, but her psycho fans), game of thrones, conservatives, quebec, instagram/tiktok (aka influencers, urg, the scourge of the earth), woods, "nature" (she's glad it exists, she just doesn't want to be in it), bugs, slow internet, the goddamn patriarchy, and the fucking TTC.  
𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗶𝗻 𝗮 𝘀𝗶𝗴𝗻𝗶𝗳𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿: a wife guy, if you're not obsessed with your partner you're doing it wrong. aside from that, someone... dreamy and enchanting, not a literal like fairy prince, but someone who makes the rest of the world invisible from just their presence alone. someone with a good heart, nice hair (jk, mostly), someone who will be there, no matter what, and who will always show up. she's prefers and honestly just needs someone mature and put together, at the very least someone who can stay calm and rational so that she can do the freaking out and the yelling.  
𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱𝗻'𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝗶𝗻 𝗮 𝘀𝗶𝗴𝗻𝗶𝗳𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿: an american. lmfao, can you imagine? that'd be a fucking nightmare (yeah, that's more clara than her oc's, but also all my oc's, we all hate america together). apart from clara's anti-american bias, someone who mansplains. there's being explainary, and then there's acting like the authority on a subject the other person has a fucking degree in, shut the fuck up. someone who is disloyal, gaslights, and is a fucking dick. being a bitch on it's own is fine, fun even, but to your friends, family, the people you're supposed to care about? you don't fuck them over, that's how relationships work. don't be a douchebag, that's why you're alone and no one likes you.
also, anyone who says bullshit like "girls don't like me because I'm a nerd and don't look like thor," no, girls don't like you because an asshole. and newsflash, only one person looks like thor, thor! idiots.  
𝗦𝗜𝗚𝗡𝗜𝗙𝗜𝗖𝗔𝗡𝗧 𝗢𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗥
𝗡𝗔𝗠𝗘: Sebastian Piper
𝗔𝗚𝗘: 31
𝗟𝗶𝗸𝗲𝘀: coffee, cooking, history, magic, taylor swift (don't lie, she makes everyone feel things and there is no shame about it), tv shows about witches and magic (they're kinda funny and he's definitely not totally actually obsessed with the original charmed - he very much is), reading, wikipedia deep dives, mythology, autumn, halloween, monster movies, godzilla, carrie, stephen king, britney spears, kafka, kazka
𝗗𝗶𝘀𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲𝘀: summer, mornings, kale, clients (god, they're the worst), annoying people (no, he will not spell out what he finds annoying, good luck to you), his little sister's mean streak (she was so nice when she was little and now she's so mean, and he's so shocked about it, like she didn't pick up that bitch ass behaviour from him), "rare" meat (it's literally just uncooked, you freaks), america
𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗶𝗻 𝗮 𝘀𝗶𝗴𝗻𝗶𝗳𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿: he thinks he doesn't have a type, but it's definitely the type of woman who could kick his ass, and kick your ass. an "in love with your carnage" boy.
𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱𝗻'𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝗶𝗻 𝗮 𝘀𝗶𝗴𝗻𝗶𝗳𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿: an insufferable know-it-all, and someone too gossipy, like, tv mean girls who make their whole personality about shit talking, that's so boring, you have nothing else to do with your life? delusionally self-centred people, the world revolves around the sun, not you, get some damn perspective.
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willowbird · 4 years ago
Note
For the prompt game: andreil and 5/6/2
Bookstore! Oblivious idiots in love! Inside my favorite disaster gay's closet!
(You guys REALLY wanna see what happens inside Andrew's closet, don't ya? XD )
---
Two short knocks, then the quick patter-tapping of nails against the door: ta-te-ta ta-te-ta ta-te-ta. Andrew sighed, but only one person ever bothered to knock when invading his domain - and he always did it in the exact same way. Two knocks and three quick series of ta-te-ta. Instead of calling for the idiot to just come in or going over to open the door, Andrew grabbed a due-out from a nearby pile of returns and hurled it at the door.
Neil apparently took the harsh thump of hardback-on-door as the permission it was and opened the door, scooping up the weaponized book on his way into the closet and letting the door swing shut behind him.
It wasn't actually a closet - it was the shop's back room. But it was such a tiny back room that the staff of The Foxpaw Bookshop had taken to calling it "the closet". There was even a sassy note on the door that said:
If it isn't on the shelf we don't have it. No, we cannot 'check the back'. There is no back. This is not a room. It is a closet.
Yes, Andrew had been the one to make up the note. Yes, he instantly regretted it when every time he stepped out of the room some idiot just had to shout "Andrew's coming out of the closet everyone BE SUPPORTIVE OR HE'LL STAB YOU!"
Yeah. Yeah.
Neil appeared on Andrew's right and instead of setting the book on the narrow table Andrew was working off of, he set a giant cup of coffee from the shop across the street. What followed was a paper plate that Neil then wordlessly unloaded the contents of a takeaway bag onto.
An orange scone, a chocolate muffin, a strawberry-frosted donut - with sprinkles, a chocolate-filled croissant, a brownie.
Andrew looked from the offering up to Neil and back again. He did not resist when Neil eased the PDT from his hand and took his place scanning and sorting titles. Instead, he stepped back to let Neil work, if only to give himself time to process what the fuck was going on. He frowned at the tiny feast, then frowned at the tiny menace beside it.
"Is it poisoned?" he asked without an iota of sarcasm or irony.
Neil looked over at him, both eyebrows raised. Then his expression smoothed out into something truly offensive. His brows relaxed and the tension he always carried around his eyes and mouth completely melted away, making him look softer and younger and too goddamn beautiful to be allowed. He wasn't smiling, not quite, but there was a warmth about the whole expression that always made Andrew feel uncomfortably... good. He did not have a word for the kind of "good", or if he did he wouldn't allow himself to even think it because those things - those warm, good, happy things were for a very different kind of person than Andrew Minyard. People like Andrew Minyard... they didn't get those things.
"No," Neil said softly, his voice matching the stupid look on his stupid face, "it is not poisoned."
Andrew snorted and picked up the coffee. He pulled off the top and inspected it, pausing at the suspiciously familiar scent. Carefully, he sipped. It was... perfect. It was exactly the way he took his coffee. Andrew's frown deepened. He took another sip, just to be sure. Then another, because it was fucking delicious and he hadn't had his coffee yet today thanks to having been called in early to deal with the surprise early delivery of their holiday stock.
"See?" Neil said, and this time there was a distinct note of teasing in his voice. Andrew shot him a glare, and Neil turned his head back to his work - but not fast enough to hide his smile.
Fuck he was pretty when he smiled.
No. Nope. Not going there. No.
Andrew took another sip of his coffee then set it aside to poke at the offering of baked goods. He picked up the brownie first. After a far-too-satisfying bite of that wonder, he asked, "Why?" He kept his tone mild, unbothered, unaffected. You know, like a lie.
Neil gave a small shrug as he manually entered an ISBN that wouldn't scan (their sole PDT was a singular piece of shit). "You had to come in early. Figured you wouldn't have time to get coffee. Even if you did, it's not like you wouldn't have use for a second cup."
This morning when he'd gotten the text from Wymack about coming in early to handle the delivery, Andrew had had to drag himself from bed and directly to his car in order to get there on time to meet the truck. Normally, he and Neil carpooled - so he'd had to text Neil at a stoplight to let him know he'd have to find his own way into work. Neil was a resourceful little fuck, so Andrew hadn't thought about it again. It certainly had never occurred to him that Neil would... do this. That Neil would do anything. That Neil would... care at all.
"That explains the coffee. Not the breakfast."
Another careless shrug from the puzzling little terror. "You like sweet things. There were a lot of sweet things in the bake case."
"So you got one of everything?"
"No, you don't like almonds, and two of the other treats had almonds on them. You also once told me that bagels are the buttholes of bread, so I didn't think you'd want to eat a bread butthole."
Andrew almost choked on a bite of brownie. Not because of the reminder of his denouncement of bagels from a few months ago, but because of the bright, delighted grin on Neil's stupid pretty face. He had not had enough coffee to deal with this idiot.
"Good call," Andrew managed dryly once he was sure he wasn't going to asphyxiate on fudgy goodness.
Looking far too pleased with himself, Neil returned to his task. Andrew glared at him for a moment, then he picked up his coffee and took a determined gulp, despite the fact that the coffee was still too hot for gulping. The burn was good, though. It woke him up a bit, helped ground him. So what if Neil detoured to the coffee shop on the way to work just to get him coffee? So what if he knew exactly how Andrew took his coffee. And that he hated almonds. And that he thought bagels were fucking stupid.
So what? It's not like it meant anything. It didn't mean anything. It didn't - it couldn't.
...right?
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andypantsx3 · 4 years ago
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war paint | 3 | captain
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pairing: Bakugou Katsuki / Reader
length: 27,765 words / 10 chapters
summary: Desperate times force you to disguise yourself and join the kingsguard. When a suspicious string of crimes strike the palace, however, Captain Katsuki Bakugou starts paying extra close attention. (spin off of in cinders)
tags: mulan AU, secret identity, romance, reader-insert
warnings: aged up characters, some violence, eventual smut
The first few weeks of your enlistment were inarguably the worst you’d ever lived.
If not on patrol, soldiers were awakened before dawn every morning and marched to the training pitch behind the castle where you drilled in different formations with various weapons. You were run through exercises that seemed designed to drop anyone with less than iron willpower, then set to menial tasks like cleaning the barracks or repairing any damaged weapons or equipment. The midday meal was the first break in your day, followed immediately by training in basic first aid and survival skills, then by more weaponry drills that took you until the dinner bell.
Between your extra training with Nishimura and the time you had to invest in sneaking off to use the lavatory or a spot to bathe in private, you were hardly resting. Even the time you did spend bathing, you spent in a constant state of anxiety, wondering if a random bunk check would reveal you missing. You hadn't chanced more than a wild, lightning fast scrub down in weeks.
At the end of the first week, you’d collected your enlistment fee with hands blistered from sword work, and it took you longer than you’d ever admit to count it out, stopping every few seconds when your eyes drifted involuntarily shut. You’d been happy to send it off to your family, though, with a short note that told them you were doing well.
Which was, of course, a lie.
You weren’t exactly the most popular among the kingsguard thanks to the show you’d put on when you arrived, and you had the misfortune of dorming in the same room as Nishimura. Despite Captain Bakugou’s warnings, he’d gone out of his way to make life uncomfortable for you, slipping bugs into your sheets and loudly discussing you in less than flattering terms well within earshot.
More than that, you were terrible at nearly everything and it was obvious. Kaminari helped you to the best of his ability, and so did Sero, the guard who’d poked fun at your age at the castle gates. Neither of them, however, could make up for the fact that as a woman, you were somewhat smaller and slighter, and hadn’t had the same opportunities building up muscle mass as men your age. Every sword felt like an anvil in your hands; lifting a mace like hauling a boulder.
The only thing you seemed to excel at was the first aid trainings. You found yourself listening with rapt attention as the court physician walked your battalion through wrapping injuries and cleaning wounds, noting which easily obtained herbs and flowers could slow blood loss or ease pain. Kaminari was always eager to pair with you during the practical exercises, as you were among the least likely to accidentally poison him with the wrong herbs. It was gratifying to be good at at least one thing.
Your favorite part of castle service, though, was the patrols.
After your first month of training, you’d been assigned thrice-weekly patrol routes and found that it was like wading into a cool river on a hot day. Patrols got you out of whichever drills were happening at the time and took you out from under Captain Bakugou’s purview and behind the relative safety of the castle walls.
Though monotonous, you only had to walk a specific route throughout the castle with a partner, and you were rarely supervised. On your first patrol with Kaminari, you also found that patrols were - for him - more of an opportunity to make social calls.
“L/N,” he said, nearly the minute you stepped inside the castle walls. “We’ve got an excellent route today.”
You raised an eyebrow in question.
He chuckled, gesturing you along. “Come on, our first stop is right over here.”
“Our first stop?” you echoed.
Kaminari grinned and grabbed your sleeve, pulling you into a side door. On the other side sat a cramped office stuffed with bright fabrics and colorful spools of thread. A woman with shocking pink hair hunched over a spill of pretty silk, working tiny, perfect stitches into the fabric.
“Mina!” Kaminari boomed and the woman sat up with a smile.
“Denki!” she said, reaching over to hug him. “It’s been a while since patrol took you over here! I have so much to tell you!”
Kaminari laughed and pulled you forward. “Me too. Mina, this is L/N! He lied about his age and wormed his way into the kingsguard.”
You whirled on him. “I’m old enough to be in the guard!”
The absolute wrong gender, but definitely the right age.
He gave you an innocent look. “I’m just passing on the popular opinion.”
Mina chuckled. “Oh, ignore him, L/N. We all do. It’s quite nice to meet you.”
Kaminari whined but Mina just laughed again, redirecting his attention to the dress she was making, saying it was for the princess-to-be. Apparently, Prince Shouto’s bride had been a kitchen girl that Mina and Denki had both been acquainted with, and they talked eagerly of the wedding they’d both been invited to and the food that would be there.
“Think old Bakugou will show up?” Kaminari asked at one point, making himself comfortable at Mina’s workstation. Mina met this with a shrug.
You gave them both a questioning look. “Why would the captain be invited?”
Kaminari turned to you conspiratorially. “Captain Bakugou and the prince grew up together - they’re something like old friends. Plus, Bakugou’s a marquis, he’s probably got an invitation just for political reasons.”
“He’s a marquis?” you asked. That explained the Lord appellation on your contract, then. “Why join the palace guard if he’s titled?”
Kaminari shrugged. “Probably not enough opportunity to torture innocent civilians in Musutafu. If he wants to hold the land, he’s got to be nice to them, hasn’t he?”
You grimaced, thinking of all the drills he’d run you through since you’d gotten here. That definitely wouldn’t endear him to anyone.
“Speaking of our favorite captain,” Mina said conversationally, “I heard he’s been meeting with the prince more often than usual.”
“Wedding stuff?” Kaminari asked, but Mina shook her head.
“As if he’d touch that mushy shit with a ten foot pole. He wouldn’t know romance if it pranced in front of him wearing a soldier’s uniform. No, I heard it’s because a bunch of papers and other valuables went missing from the prince’s study last Thursday night.”
Your mind wandered back to last Thursday, wondering if you’d been on patrol when it had happened. You only dredged up a memory of snuggling down into your bunk, relieved that Nishimura and his goon friend Hasumi were out on their own patrol and your bed was thankfully bug free.
Kaminari’s eyebrows went up. “Important papers?”
Mina raised a thin shoulder. “From what I heard, it seemed to be a weird selection. A couple letters, some wedding arrangements. But a land treaty disappeared as well. They think it’s a spy.”
Kaminari whistled. “Bet old Baku is pissed this happened on his watch. No wonder he’s been in such a foul mood lately.” He turned to you. “Don’t you think he’s been a little too happy when one of us gets clipped by the wrong edge of the sword?”
You thought back to his threats in the mess hall. “He seems normal enough to me.”
Kaminari mulled that over. “I suppose he’s usually that awful.”
Mina smiled. “Talking of which, shouldn’t you be getting on with your patrol? I’d hate to find out what he’d do if he found out you were in here gossiping.”
A spike of panic stabbed through your heart and you grabbed Kaminari’s sleeve. “Excellent observation, Mina. We really should be going. It was wonderful to meet you!”
You tugged Kaminari roughly back through the doorway. You thought it was a testament to his own fear of the captain that he went willingly enough.
The rest of your patrol proved uneventful, however, Bakugou thankfully never being alerted to your social stop. Your patrol ended just after the dinner bell and you ate quickly in the mess hall, then rushed off to the training pitch.
Today was also the last day of your punishment for fighting in the mess hall on your first day, and you thought dreamily of all the rested muscles and extra time you’d have on your hands once extra training ended. You might be able to sneak off to bathe at a normal time of the evening instead of in the dead of night, starting tomorrow.
Your good cheer faded quickly, however, as you arrived at the pitch to find Captain Bakugou there.
Nishimura was just behind you and he stopped short at your side. “Where’s our usual drill officer?” he demanded.
A horrible grin cut into Bakugou’s features, bearing his sharp canines. He looked like a wolf ready to tear into a nest of rabbits, and your stomach flipped. “Ojiro’s off duty tonight. Thought I’d see if you’d learned your lesson myself.”
You inhaled sharply, and Bakugou caught it, laughing. “Thought I’d forgotten about you two fucks, didn’t you?”
You lowered your gaze and took a deep, steadying breath. Just tonight. You just had to get through tonight and you would be free.
Nishimura seemed to steel himself as well, sweeping a hand through his dark hair. “What are our drills tonight, Captain?”
Bakugou’s crimson gaze flickered over you both. “Fight me.”
You looked up, startled. “Fight you?”
He looked you over disdainfully. “You’re a goddamn soldier, you telling me you can’t fight? Didn’t seem to stop you in the mess hall.”
You bit your lip, but Nishimura stepped forward, that violent gleam in his eye. “Yes, sir.”
Bakugou grinned. “I’m gonna fucking wipe this field with you.”
Nishimura didn’t dare correct his superior, but his hand went quickly to his sword and he leaned forward eagerly. Before you even had time to blink, the clash of metal rang out across the field and Bakugou had Nishimura on the defensive, pushing him back into step with you. You hadn’t even seen him go for his sword.
Swearing, you fumbled for your own blade, whipping it out just in time to catch the swipe Bakugou aimed at your side. You stumbled under the force of the strike, tripping backwards.
Nishimura growled and lunged again, but Bakugou was faster, parrying his attack and following up with his own. A low chuckle escaped him as he caught Nishimura with the back edge of his blade, winding him and sending him staggering back.
Bakugou whipped back to you, targeting you with another fast swipe that you barely caught in time. The strength of his blow almost knocked your sword from your grasp, shuddering up your arm and leaving you gasping.
“What the fuck are you in the kingsguard for if you won’t fight?” he snarled. Another swipe came your way and again you barely caught it. Your heart beat frantically in your chest and you tried to duck out of range of his arm.
“Come back here, pretty boy,” Bakugou taunted, advancing on you, but Nishimura cut in with another attack. Bakugou whipped the edge of his blade up again, faster than your eye could follow, catching the strike. You caught the curl of that savage grin on the corner of his mouth again before he moved, ducking under Nishimura’s arm and twisting his blade. It slid along the edge of Nishimura’s sword with an awful screech, then caught the hilt at an angle, ripping it straight out of Nishimura’s grip.
A kick from Bakugou had Nishimura on the ground and just as quickly he twisted back around, stalking back towards you. Your heartbeat quickened in fear as he approached, crimson gaze burning into you.
“You don’t belong here if you can’t face me,” he ground out. “Fight me or I’m discharging you. That’s a fucking order.”
You trembled, but lifted your blade. You needed the money to send back to your parents. It was too early to be discharged - if you left now, they’d have no way of clearing the debt.
You thrust your sword forward but Bakugou dodged easily. You quickly flicked through all the maneuvers you’d been drilling the past month, and followed up with a lunge. Bakugou grinned, flicking it aside with a quick twist of his wrist.
“Put your back into it, shrimp,” he demanded.
You gripped your sword with both hands, bringing it down on him with all the force you had in you. Bakugou deflected, and before you knew what was happening, your sword was rent from your grasp, skidding along the dirt of the pitch behind you.
The flat of Bakugou’s sword came up to tip your chin up to him.
“Pathetic,” he spat, “you fight like a damn woman.”
Your hands curled into fists at your sides. Bakugou’s sharp eyes caught it and he smirked. “You gonna punch me, pretty boy?”
You struggled to tamp down the hot anger bubbling up inside you like a spring from the earth. “No, sir.”
He eyed you distrustfully, pressing the flat of his blade into your chin a little harder. “I’d think seriously about what the fuck you think you’re doing here. This is the kingsguard and I don’t need weak little shits like you endangering the royal family or your fellow soldiers.”
You stared back at him, not daring to speak. Your blood rushed in your ears and your heart hammered wildly in your chest.
After a long moment he lowered his blade, sheathing it back at his hip. He looked over at Nishimura, who was delicately picking himself up off the ground.
“Disappointing,” Bakugou said roughly. “I’ve seen enough here. You’re both dismissed - back to your dormitories.”
You nodded, backing away from him. Nishimura stalked off, and you turned and picked your way gingerly back across the field, stopping only to pick up your sword and tuck it back into the belt at your waist. You set off slowly for the barracks, something like hot tears stinging at the back of your eyes.
You didn’t look back, but you swore you could feel a pair of crimson eyes on you as you slipped quietly through the dark.
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anonniemousefics · 4 years ago
Note
Can we please get more tfota scenes from cardan's pov? Maybe something from qon this time 🙈
Happy New Year! ♥️🥂
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It’s so great you guys are enjoying these Cardan POV pieces! This one sort of follows His Monstrous Bride and this other little continuation -- it’s taken from Chapter 18 of The Queen of Nothing when Jude and Cardan talk about her exile before meeting with the Living Council. 
I don’t have a title for it -- let’s just call it His Monstrous Bride Part II. lol
(Also a shameless plug for my ongoing fic The Nine Terrifying Moons, which will feature a Cardan POV chapter coming soon. Wheeeee!)
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Cardan is well versed at hiding his emotions, but it doesn’t hurt to look the part. And the day that his High Queen is finally awakening, once again restored to Elfhame, is a day to dress for a very specific kind of battle. Jude has ignored him for months – now he must be unignorable. He has gold along his cheekbones and caps like gold knives at the tips of his ears. Jude likes knives after all.
He’s flanked by his guards at her door. (Their door? He’s unused to sharing.) The Living Council means to interrupt her convalescence, and he’ll have none of it. He’s there to make sure she is fit and ready, and he doesn’t have to do more than that, he tells himself. His envoy is at his sides at all times now, and still, in this moment, some part of him wishes there were more of them. Wishes he could shrink back from what may lie ahead.
“Your Highness?” His guards are waiting for him to do something. He hadn’t realized how long he’d been hesitating.
It’s just… it’s been months of endless rejection, though he knows now she never received his letters, but still…he’s not sure he can take one more. And his heart is still cracked and raw from her most recent brush with death.
He steels himself. And knocks at the door.
It’s Oak who answers with an innocent smile, which is something of a relief. With Oak around, Jude’s less likely to become stabby.
Although, at least if she’s stabbing him, she’s no longer ignoring him. And Cardan really can’t stand one more minute of being ignored by Jude Duarte.
She’s there now, and the sight of her standing catches him right in the chest. The last time he’d clapped eyes on her, she was bleeding all over his spider-silk sheets. He’d cleaned her blood with his own two hands, but now she’s upright and clear-eyed, dressed in a foreboding black number with silver at her collar and cuffs. Her auburn hair has been braided like a crown, and with smoky traces of rose around her eyes, she looks deadly and formidable once more.
It’s such a welcome sight. He has never been so thrilled to see her. And that’s such a treacherous and terrifying notion, since he thinks it’s very likely she’s might smack him in the near future if he can’t navigate the mess of crossed wires between them.
The thrill lasts only a moment, because then his stomach gives a lurch. He’s just realized that all of her sisters are there, too. And they’re all staring at him. And he’s been staring right back.
Suddenly, Cardan’s on the verge of breaking into a cold sweat.
“Walk with me,” he finally tells Jude, eager to get away from so many Duarte eyes.
“Of course.” Jude’s brown eyes in particular seem uncharacteristically wide and confused.
Vivienne catches Jude’s hand before she can join him.
“You’re not well enough,” she objects. As if Cardan can’t take care of her. As if he hadn’t cleaned up her blood himself.
“The Living Council is eager to speak with her,” he says instead. Jude should be proud of how he’s learned to curb his tongue in her absence.
“The only danger anyone has ever been in at a Council meeting is of being bored to death,” Jude is reassuring her family, before stepping away, the guards folding in around them.
Cardan offers her his arm – he wants to keep her close, and he wants Vivienne to take note. It is different now, and he wants them all to see. Jude is cared for here.
He wants to take his time with her at his arm as they swap neutral business about the Roach, about the Bomb, about Madoc, but he can hardly even look at her. His head is full of visions of those nights he wrote to her again and again, outright begging in the end, and then lying awake, alone, certain his agony would be never-ending. Gods above, he’d even written once that his heart was hers, buried with her in the soil of the mortal world -- and she’d sent no reply. And though he knows now it’s because she hadn’t even received it, he’s still completely unsure of how to act.
It’s extremely unsettling how normal Jude seems in this moment. As if no time has passed at all.
And there are still so many eyes on them. Courtiers bobbing their heads as they pass. The guards just an arm’s length away. This is no place to try to sort through what he had written to her, what she needed to know. So maybe he just won’t, he thinks. Maybe it can just be like this for an eternity and he can go back to drinking away his feelings after this Council meeting. Maybe this is the most he should hope for.
But then, Jude says: “I need to talk to you.”
And his heart plummets to his guts. He’s not sure he can keep the dread off his face.
“It won’t take long,” Jude says, which is maybe worse. It means it’s simple: she wants to end their marriage. She wants to return to the mortal world. Of course she does.
But then, she says: “Whatever your scheme is, whatever you are planning to hold over me, you might as well tell me now, before we’re in front of the whole Council. Make your threats. Do your worst.”  
What? What the bleeding skies is she talking about? This is such a mess he’s made. And it is, perhaps, the first mess he’s ever truly cared to clean up.
Cardan turns them away toward a corridor to the outdoors.
“Yes,” he agrees. “We do need to talk.”
He steers them for the royal rose garden, where he knows the guards will stop at the gate and leave them alone. He has only a few steps down a path of shimmering quartz stairs among the roses to decide exactly what parts of his heart he’s willing to reveal today. What exactly won’t hurt so terribly much should she throw it all back in his face.
“I assume you weren’t actually trying to shoot me,” he says, choosing first the obvious and easiest. “Since the note was in your handwriting.”
“Madoc sent the Ghost--” Jude starts, but then stops. Softens. “I thought that there was going to be an attempt on your life.”
This does not mean that she cares for you, he has to remind himself. He still doesn’t want to look at her. The memory of perceived rejection is still too strong, still too bitter.
But he’s not going to live with the regrets he’d drowned in when she’d nearly died. He tries to choose his next words carefully.
“It was terrifying,” he admits, feigning interest in a nearby bush of jet black roses, “watching you fall. I mean, you’re generally terrifying, but I am unused to fearing for you.” He swallows back the memories, threatening the periphery of his mind. “And then I was furious. I am not sure I have ever been that angry before.”  
“Mortals are fragile,” Jude shrugs him off. She doesn’t get it.
“Not you,” he sighs. “You never break.”
There. Can that be enough? He’s made it fairly obvious now, hasn’t he? Surely she gets it now – he doesn’t want her to die, he doesn’t want to see her hurt. Witnessing it was the worst thing he’s ever seen. Because he cares for her.
If he has to spell it out, it might kill him. So, he just waits for what she has to say to that.
Jude’s looking at the roses, too, when he glances at her, her thick lashes lowered.
“When I came here, pretending to be Taryn, you said you’d sent me messages,” she says, and oh, please, gods, not this. “You seemed surprised I hadn’t gotten any. What was in them?”
Cardan wants to vomit. No, he needs to vomit. If his nervous stomach would cooperate and vomit everywhere, he could still get away from this with a shred of dignity.
He clasps his hands behind his back so she can’t see how they shake, his smile telling the lies that the rest of him can’t. That he is cool and unaffected, not at all hopelessly in love with the mortal girl in front of him.
“Pleading, mostly.” He tries to say it like it’s a joke. “Beseeching you to come back. Several indiscreet promises.” Maybe that little bit of tantalizing will flatter her.
It doesn’t. Actually, he’s not sure Jude can be flattered. She closes her eyes shut in no small amount of frustration.
“Stop playing games,” she growls. “You sent me into exile.”
“Yes. That.” Right, of course she doesn’t love that he’s beating around the bush. If only he could help it. He’s so goddamn nervous. “I can’t stop thinking about what you said to me, before Madoc took you. About it being a trick. You meant marrying you, making you queen, sending you to the mortal world, all of it, didn’t you?”
The glare she throws him is so very Jude, though he loves it less when it’s directed at him.
“Of course it was a trick,” she seethes. “Wasn’t that what you said in return?”
Well, this is rich.
“But that’s what you do. You trick people.” Though Cardan’s starting to realize just how wrong he’s been about the things Jude enjoys. “I thought you’d admire me a little for it, that I could trick you. I thought you’d be angry, of course, but not quite like this.”
“What?” Jude looks like she could unhinge her jaw and swallow him whole. He might even deserve it.
He needs to put an end to this nightmare. There’s still a miniscule chance she’ll find some part of it amusing.
“Let me remind you that I didn’t know you’d murdered my brother, the ambassador to the Undersea, until that very morning,” he points out. Surely, the context will help his case. “My plans were made in haste. And perhaps I was a little annoyed. I thought it would pacify Queen Orlagh, at least until all promises were finalized in the treaty. By the time you guessed the answer, the negotiations would be over.”
But Jude’s face is unchanged. He isn’t seriously this good at trickery, is he?
“Think of it,” he presses, hoping she’ll follow along. “I exile Jude Duarte to the mortal world. Until and unless she is pardoned by the crown.” Any minute now. Any minute.
“Pardoned by the crown,” he repeats to her blank stare. Right, so, this game isn’t funny anymore.
“Meaning by the King of Faerie. Or its queen,” he explains, watching her eyes grow wider, wilder. “You could have returned anytime you wanted.”
When he’d first envisioned her figuring out the riddle, he’d expected probably a punch in the arm, maybe she would have even drawn her blade again. That would have been delightful. He’d thought about trembling beneath her again, about that searing look she got in her eye just before devouring his lips. That would have been – gods. He might have considered letting her murder more of his brothers to have that again.
But what is happening now is decidedly the opposite. Jude’s breath is quickening, her face flushing, and in the air between them, Cardan feels a rift cracking wider. He hasn’t played a trick – he’s done something horrible.
When Jude begins to back away from him, he thinks back to what it felt like to find Nicasia with Locke. What Jude’s face is doing now – that is what his heart had done then. She is recoiling from him. Jude Duarte is recoiling from him, because he has hurt her.
He honestly had not thought it was possible. He honestly had not thought himself capable. He honestly had not thought she cared enough.
She whirls then and marches away from him, and he has never hated himself more. Stop her, he thinks, but he’s still stunned. If he’d known she cared…
Stop her!
He runs after her. She has to know he wouldn’t have done it if he’d known. She has to know he will fight to keep her now that he knows. But when he seizes her arm, she hauls around and slaps him, hard enough to turn his face.
It’s not the worst hit he’s taken, not by a long shot, but its sting is entirely different. There’s something fiery in her eyes, and, for the first time, he’s aware that he is not the only one who has been in agony these long months. Oh, he would undo it all now if he could. He would pull her in and kiss her over and over until they both stopped hurting.
Except she still looks murderous. Getting close to her face is probably not a good idea if he doesn’t want to be bitten. (He does kind of want to be bitten, just…in a very different scenario.)
“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” he says, carefully, and his hand finds hers. To his great surprise, she lets their fingers lace together, and his heart seizes with a wild hope. It does not mean she loves you, he thinks. He fumbles. “No, it’s not that, not exactly. I didn’t think I could hurt you. And I never thought you would be afraid of me.”
“And did you like it?” Jude asks, narrowing her eyes.
His cheek is hot from the slap of her hand, and now with shame. Because how is he supposed to answer that? He didn’t hate being more powerful for once. He didn’t hate being the one with the answer to the riddle.
“Well, I was hurt.” He’s hesitated too long, and now Jude’s pressing on. “And yes, you scare me.”
Cardan finds himself taking in her full face then, the one that has always seemed so defiant and fearless and headstrong.
“You’ve always scared me,” Jude is saying, and this is what almost undoes him. She repeats it, telling him again and again each moment she had been afraid of him, and with each one, his mind bursts a little more. This doesn’t seem real. “And I am scared of you now,” she concludes, that defiant gleam in her eye til the end.
Cardan is speechless. And Cardan’s never speechless.
There was a time when he enjoyed playing a villain in her heroic story line, but she wasn’t supposed to be truly afraid of him. She was supposed to vanquish him and make him beg for her kindness. (And he would now. He really would.)
(Maybe he will.)
“You despised me,” Jude reminds him, because he does need reminding. He’s not sure now if he ever really did. “When you said you wanted me, it felt like the world had turned upside down. But sending me into exile, that made sense. That was an entirely right-side-up Cardan move. And I hated myself for not seeing it coming. And I hate myself for not seeing what you’re going to do to me next.”
At that, Cardan closes his eyes. Hopelessness is threatening to overtake him. Fear has created this monster before him, the one who irrevocably holds his heart. Is it possible to unmake such a curse? He’s certainly been unable to find a cure for his own fear, lifelong coward that he is.
When she’d first returned and his heart was freshly cracked, he’d thought back to a fairy story about a boy cursed with a heart of stone and the monster he took as his bride. It had been patience and fearlessness that had won over the monster in the end – something the boy had managed only because of his stony heart.
So, Cardan thinks of stones then. Of pulling together all his cracked and raw edges. Of being impenetrable and solid and fearless. He thinks of doing what needs to be done. He needs her, for so many things, and she must know that. Perhaps it is folly to wish for anything more than simply averting a crisis.
But he can’t manage it if he’s looking at her. He releases her hand and turns away.
“I can see why you thought what you did,” he says at last. “I suppose I am not an easy person to trust. And maybe I ought not to be trusted, but let me say this: I trust you.”
Patience. Fearlessness. Deep breath.
“You may recall that I did not want to be High King. And that you did not consult me before plopping this crown on my head. You may further recollect that Balekin didn’t want me to keep the title and that the Living Council never took a real shine to me.
“There was a prophecy given when I was born. Usually Baphen is uselessly vague, but in this case, he made it clear that should I rule, I would make a very poor king.” It hurts more than he thought it would to say it out loud. “The destruction of the crown, the ruination of the throne – a lot of dramatic language.”
He has to be cavalier about it; it stings too much otherwise. It’s been the bane of his existence, this prophecy. It is the reason his entire childhood was filled with nothing but dismissal and cruelty. It’s the very, very low standard he’s spent his whole life trying not to meet. The best his family had ever hoped for from him was his complete and utter disappearance – and he’d failed to do even that.
He turns back to Jude. Patience. Fearlessness. He has so much more to say. He has so much more he wants to be than this. Deep breath.
“When you forced me into working for the Court of Shadows, I never thought of the things I could do – frightening people, charming people – as talents, no less ones that might be valuable. But you did. You showed me how to use them to be useful. I never minded being a minor villain, but it’s possible I might have grown into something else, a High King as monstrous as Dain. And if I did – if I fulfilled that prophecy, I ought to be stopped. And I believe that you would stop me.”
Jude sputters at that, blinking hard.
“Stop you?” she echoes. “Sure. If you’re a huge jerk and a threat to Elfhame, I’ll pop your head right off.”
“Good.” And he means it. To die by Jude’s hand would be a dream. “That’s one reason I didn’t want to believe you’d joined up with Madoc. The other is that I want you here by my side,” and just for good measure, just in case she still isn’t getting it: “As my queen.”
But he can’t read the expression on Jude’s face when he says it – if it brings her joy, if it brings her more distress. He’s not sure what else he could have said to make it any more clear. And now her silence is threatening to eat him alive. This reeks of the beginnings of yet another rejection.
He smiles at her, instinctively, a last ditch effort to make this even slightly less awkward.
“But now that you’re High Queen and back in charge, I won’t be doing anything of consequence anyway,” he promises. “If I destroy the crown and ruin the throne, it will only be through neglect.”
He wants her to smile back. To roll her eyes at him and act like she isn’t amused when she so clearly is. He’s missed that, oh, how he’s missed that.
He gets all that and more when she blurts out a laugh.
“So that’s your excuse for not doing any of the work?” She quirks an eyebrow, and it makes his heart swell. They’re smiling together again. He’d needed that, too, more than he’d realized. “You must be draped in decadence at all times because if you aren’t kept busy, you might fulfill some half-baked prophecy.”
“Exactly,” he says. Exactly�� It’s more true than he wants it to be. His smile fades. And Jude is looking more tired than he’s comfortable with. He hopes he has not pushed her too hard. He touches her arm, gently, not thinking. Her gaze catches his, soft and warm. He finds himself leaning in…
“Would you like me to inform the Council that you will see them another time?” he asks. “It will be a novelty to have me make your excuses.”
But Jude is stalwart and determined as ever. He expected nothing less.
He pulls back. She does not need him. Not like he needs her.
“No, I’m ready,” she says.
How he wishes he could say the same.
-----------
Tagging: @yellowavocadopit, @dagypsygirl, @ireallyshouldsleeprn, @booklover-sleeplover, @mwejh, @courtofjurdan, @faeriequeenofwest, @sugawsites, @loveyourselfsolid, @owl0y0s, @feelinglikecleopatra, @akaloto, @charrise, @persephxnecoven, @raging-bisexual-alert, @rteme, @nahthanks, @addies-invisible-life, @elorcanislife, @snusbandxknifewife, @poeticbrownmermaid, @duarteegreenbriar, @thefolkofthefic, @alittledribbledrabble, @carmensworld17, @annejulianneh111, @amandlas, @elriel4life, @idk-what-name-to-use, @thewickedkings, @juliazato, @woodsbeyond1, @booksmusicandgoodvibes, 
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365days365movies · 4 years ago
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March 21, 2021: Orlando (1992)
Tilda Swinton...confuses me.
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Like, in a good way. Because Tilda may be the most versatile actor working today. I mean, look at the goddamn filmography, and you’ll see what I’ve mean. I’ve seen Tilda Swinton in a lot, surprisingly, and I don’t think anything I’ve seen was bad. For example, I am an ARDENT defender in the portrayal of the Ancient One in the MCU.
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I understand the controversy here, but I actually think this is excellent casting. Especially considering...being comic book-accurate would NOT have been a good idea with this role, if we’re trying to AVOID controversy. But Tilda Swinton FUCKING KILLED IT in this role, and I will always be happy for this choice.
Let’s see, there’s Jadis in the Narnia films, as shown at the top, there’s Snowpiercer, as Mason (an amazing character, and an acting job that Swinton disappears into), Moonrise Kingdom as Social Services, The Grand Budapest Hotel as Madame D., and Gabriel in Constantine. Which is a good segue to the next talking point...
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Gabriel is pointedly androgynous, and honestly, Tilda Swinton kind of is as well. You may have noticed that I haven’t used any pronouns in referencing to Tilda Swinton, entirely out of respect. Gonna be a little hard to keep up with, so I’ll be using she/her from here on out, only because those are the pronouns that Swinton’s most recently promoted for herself. She’s also referred to herself as queer of some variety, as well as being famously gender non-conforming.
Which is fitting, given that a lot of that public image began with today’s movie, one of her first big roles. I’ll be revisiting Swinton in the independent movie scene in a couple of months, but this may be a good introduction. Instead of spoiling anything off the bat, I’m gonna jump right in. And so, I present: Orlando. SPOILERS AHEAD!!!
Recap (1/2)
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We begin with a young man named, well, Orlando (Tilda Swinton), a young man with a feminine appearance and a good upbringing. His name means power land and property, but all he really wants is company. He writes and rests by a tree in the day, but falls asleep by mistake. When he wakes up, he runs back to where he’s meant to be, with a tribute to Queen Elizabeth I (Quentin Crisp) playing in the background. And that’s a REAL song, by the way, actually sung in the 1600s for Elizabeth! Very neat.
A title screen flashes, reading “1600: Death”, and we see where Orlando is meant to be. He speaks poetry for the Queen and her court, but is interrupted by the aged queen, who asks whether or not his poem is appropriate for her presence, as the poem is about youth, and Queen Elizabeth is not that. Orlando’s father (John Bott), who is serving as host to Elizabeth, intervenes on his behalf. However, it doesn’t seem to matter to the Queen, as she invites Orlando back to England to serve as her “favourite”. He accepts, and soon lives alongside the Queen. She quickly promises Orlando much land and property, for him and his heirs, but on one condition: that he does not fade, wither, or grow old. 
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The same wish cannot be applied to Elizabeth herself, nor to his father, as both grow old and die soon afterwards. Fast forward 10 years, and it’s a cold winter in England. Visiting Orlando’s vast estate is a woman from Russia, named Sasha (Charlotte Valandrey), and Orlando quickly falls for her. This is to the dismay of Euphrosne (Anna Healy), his fiancée? I’m not sure, to be honest, but they’re definitely involved, and she’s definitely upset.
However, this is also a scandal for everybody else as well, not just because Orlando’s already engaged, but also because Sasha is Russian, during a particularly poor economic period for the country. Euphrosne angrily throws his ring back at him, and Orlando speaks directly to the audience, telling us that a man must follow his heart. The two go to his private cottage, and they start to make out, when Orlando suddenly comes down with intense melancholy.
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Because this is such great happiness that he feels, but this happiness too will one day end. Which is, like, the most emo-shit I’ve ever heard, but I’m kinda here for it. And yet, that happiness does indeed end, when Sasha is forced to return to Russia, despite Orlando’s pleading for her to stay. He asks her to meet him at London Bridge, so that they may elope together.
Later, Orlando happens upon a performance of Othello, noting to us that it’s a terrific play. This is as the death of Othello is being played out, so that’s probably foreshadowing, right? Anyway, Orlando leads two horses through the thick fog, waiting for Sasha to arrive and come away with him. But as a storm sets in, there is no sign of Sasha. And Orlando stands there in the rain. Said rain, though, soon becomes ice, underneath his feet, floating away down the river, along with his hopes of a happy future with Sasha. The treachery of women, according to Orlando.
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Over the next week, Orlando languishes in his bed, asleep for the entire time. Increasingly more servants are brought up to try and rouse him, only for him to remain asleep, no matter what they do. But then, he wakes up, noting that he can only conjure three words to describe women, none of them worth explaining.
Forty years later, and the title screen cries “Poetry”! And Orlando looks exactly the same. Guess he really took that whole “don’t grow old” thing from Elizabeth to heart, huh? He speaks to a poet, Nick Greene (Heathcote Williams), and gushes about his poetry, which is a pursuit that he loves greatly. But Nick is...well, Nick is kind of a dick, to be honest. Orlando wants only to share his love and his poetry with him, but Nick’s only in it for the money. Not a true artist, and he mocks Orlando’s poetry, which he reads only after Orlando offers him money. And then, he writes a poem mocking Orlando further, which angers Orlando...but doesn’t stop the money flowing to Nick.
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Orlando moves onto his next pursuit, in 1700, in the next section: Politics. Now over 100 years old, Orlando becomes an ambassador to the Ottoman Empire, and travels to Constantinople. There, he receives a somewhat rough and awkward greeting, which Orlando is not helping with. They share some Turkish coffee, Orlando has trouble drinking that Turkish coffee, they drink a LOT of Turkish coffee, and they toast to multiple things, including the “beauty of women, and the joys of love.” Orlando pauses at this, and reveals that he is still suffering quite a bit of heartbreak. His Turkish friend, the Khan (Lothaire Bluteau), bonds with him about this.
After 10 years, Orlando has fully retreated into life as a Turkish man. This is interrupted by a British emissary, sent to bring him news of a new appointment and power from the Queen. However, something goes wrong when the Khan arrives and takes Orlando hostage. The city is under attack, and the Khan asks Orlando if he will help against their enemies. Orlando agrees, and gives them arms, and heads to help himself at the walls. There, he witnesses a man dying, and it shakes him greatly. And just like before, he sleeps it off for seven days. And then...she wakes up.
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YUP. WHAT.
Yeah, um, Orlando is now a woman. Like she says: “Same person, just a different sex.” Which is a very interesting premise, not gonna lie. Looks like Orlando now has to live life as a woman, which is going to be...difficult in 1700s Turkey. Or England. Or anywhere. Or any time.
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Still, Orlando approaches this new life with aplomb, and without really any needed caution. Parading in some awesome dresses, she greets fellow nobility as the lady Orlando. However, the emissary from earlier, Archduke Harry (John Wood), begins to recognize her as similar to the lord Orlando.
In speaking with a group of poets, however, Orlando learns EXACTLY what men think of women in this society, and it’s not even a little bit good. She leaves, enraged and embarrassed. Harry also speaks with her, assuming that she was a woman all along. However, Orlando’s in EVEN MORE shit, as she’s quickly served with papers that are an attempt to take away all of her property and titles, because Lord Orlando is legally dead, and Lady Orlando is a woman, which one of them says is basically the same thing. FUCKIN’ YIKES, BRUV.
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Ah, but Harry tries to help by proposing to her ON THE FUCKIN’ SPOT. He believed that Orlando was perfect as both genders, and is happy to do it. However, Orlando understandably refuses, and after Harry tells her that she will die as a spinster, alone and dispossessed, she runs into a nearby hedge maze. And while in the hedge maze, time passes, and her outfit changes to match the period accordingly.
Forward 140 years now! The year is 1850, and a new chapter begins: Sex.
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And as she runs from the maze, she runs into who else...but Shelmerdine (Billy Zane), a man who...Shelmerdine? SHELMERDINE? What fuckin’ witch cursed his entirely family line to have THAT name? That’s the kind of family that was named AFTER a bridge, not the other way around! WHAT KINDA NAME IS FUCKIN’ SHELMERDINE?
Well, I’ve looked it up now, and it is apparently a real name. So, if any Shelmerdines are reading this...I mean, I’m sorry, but also, FUCKIN’ SHELMERDINE? OK, back to Shelmerdine. He’s twisted his ankle falling off his horse, and Orlando is now taking care of him. She reveals, in the process, that she’s about to lose everything. The reasons for that aren’t quite said, but Shelmerdine offers a place at his side, back to the great free land of America.
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After having a conversation about the roles of men and women in the world (which is interesting given the context of the film in general), the two fulfill the chapter’s imperative. And we never see the act, but we do get some interesting angles and hand-holding. But the next morning, this post-coital reverie is interrupted by the lawyers from the Queen. The lawsuits have been settled, and Orlando has been legally declared a woman, meaning that unless she has a son, all of her possessions will be lost.
Shelmerdine (I swear, every time I say that name, a fairy gets chlamydia) leaves as well, with the southwest wind. As he heads back to America to fight for freedom, Orlando stands in the rain, facing an uncertain future, and broken fully by the politics of the time period.
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And then...the sound of planes overhead. Looks like a new time period once again, heading into the periods of World Wars, and Orlando is now...heavily pregnant. OH. FUCK. Welcome to the next chapter: Birth.
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We jump past the period of World War II, and to the 1990s! Orlando is presenting a book to a publisher, and he believes that the book will sell. With her young daughter in tow, she finally goes back to her old mansion, now finally able to go back after losing it 100 years prior. The narration from the beginning repeats, recontextualized for Orlando’s new life. She is over 400 years old, and finally, FINALLY...she is happy.
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And that’s Orlando! I think I loved it. Real talk, this was a fascinating movie, and I’m into it. I’m very much into it. I’m sure there’s more to be gleaned from this film, but I’m glad I watched it regardless. More in the Review, though! See you there!
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17tetsuro · 4 years ago
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semi eita x reader where y/n is a vb player too, they dislike each other but are usually civil til one day one of them get jealous and they start insulting each other badly but then they make up and realize they actually might like each other
semi x gn!reader enemies to lovers
warnings: swearing
requests are open!
oh god- this one was so fun to write, thank you for requesting!! i kind of altered your request (just a teeny tiny bit), i hope you don’t mind !! i also didn’t specify if reader is on the boys’ team or not, so the story stays gender neutral <3 i couldnt come up w a title to save my life so- but i still hope you like it !!!
* you seriously have no idea why you and semi hate each other
* like ?? objectively theres nothing wrong with him but if you look at him you kinda wanna punch him
* like ,, no hate involved?? he just has a v punchable face
* both of u being volleyball players at the same school you’d think you’d get along
* but nope
* whenever he gets the chance, semi just starts relentlessly dissing you and your plays and thats another thing u wanna punch him for
* “your posture was off and the way you attempted to spike that ball was terrible”
* you always have a comeback that includes at least one profanity and (only, if hes lucky) one attempt to knock him out
* everyone involved in volleyball at shiratorizawa tried to get you to get along but it never worked
* one time tendou locked you in the storage room and you had to climb out the window and endure semi’s constant commentary on how the way you’re climbing is inefficient
* so, you were both pretty fed up with each other
* it was no surprise the whole thing exploded in your faces
* it was after a match that semi started talking about your mistakes again and oh boy
“seriously, if you just paid attention in practice, you’d know how to hit a damn line shot, but no,” semi said, and you finally had enough.
“why would i take advice from a replaced setter? go back to practicing pinch serves, maybe you’ll actually be useful to the team.”
okay, well, that might have been too low of a blow, because you actually thought (though it was hard to admit it to yourself) semi was a decent player and reliable teammate. even as a pinch server, he always did the best he possibly could. but he was not going to hear about these thoughts of yours. ever.
you took in his appearance and duly noted the traces of hurt that were visible in his eyes for a split second.
“you’re a bitch. whoever thought you playing volleyball was a good idea, was clearly a fucking dumbass. you could not get a single point if it weren’t for everyone else dragging you along,” he spat back, arms crossing as he spoke. you tried to not be visibly surprised at the way he just pulled up a facade from out of the blue. his words, though harsh, didn’t sting as much as they should have; he clearly just said these things out of pure anger.
“fuck you, semi,” you replied, fully ready to leave the conversation, when you were suddenly grabbed by tendou, and taken to the locker room.
“tendou, if you don’t put me down i will set your fucking house on fire,” you said, struggling against his grip.
before he could reply, ushijima showed up, with semi dragging behind him. who’s the dog now?, you couldn’t help but think.
“you are going to figure out why the hell you can’t even be in the same room together. now. knock three times when you finally decided that you were going to be civil with each other. if either of you tries to escape, i will personally report it to the principal. toodles,” tendou said, while ushijima nodded along. seemingly satisfied with themselves, the two men left the room and you hear the faint sound of the lock turning. great.
you heard semi huff, and undoubtedly he had that stupid pout on his face that irked you so much. you just rolled your eyes.
“what, no comment about my posture?” you mocked, unable to stop yourself from picking a fight.
you did not expect semi to stay quiet; he always bit back when you attempted to pick on him. the only thing you could think of that could have fucked him up was your comment, but there was no way he was so affected by it, right?
“whatever,” you mumbled, crossing your arms and fixing your gaze from the wall in front of you to your shoes.
the silence was practically eating you alive. you were not used to just being in semi’s company without bickering, and it felt horribly wrong that you were both quiet.
you just opened your mouth to make a comment about how much tendou and ushijima suck, when he spoke up, finally: “you’re a bitch, you know that?”
oh, now that you could deal with. “and you’re a dick. what’s your point? you thought you could constantly pick on me and i would just take it? think again,” you spat, glancing at him.
he was hunched over, elbows resting on his knees, hands supporting his chin as le leaned forward. he did have the pout on his face.
“you’re so fucking dense,” he settled on saying, and you just rolled your eyes. before you could form a comeback, he continued: “tell me, did i ever pick on you, as you put it, without commenting on a mistake of yours?” he tilted his head to look at you and there was something unfamiliar in his gaze.
you thought hard about his question; thinking back, he never did anything but point out mistakes you made that you were not always aware of. he must have seen your answer on your face.
“exactly. did you manage to work on your posture while spiking? did your line shot improve?” and you hated that he kind of had a point; you did spend hours perfecting your form and your line shot after he commented on them. “i was trying to help you,” he added, seemingly as an afterthought.
now that just made you confused; helping you? why? “and why would you help me? aren’t i your mortal enemy or something?” you mumbled.
“where did you get that from?” he asked, eyebrows furrowed. “i just wanted you to improve because i think you have a bright future ahead of you if you continue to play volleyball.”
“what?” you deadpanned. “you’re just pranking me. you’re gonna make fun of me for believing you.”
“yeah, sure. this is all a ploy, i want you to know you’re a wonderful player all your faults aside just so i can go and laugh behind your back that you believed me,” he said, rolling his eyes.
you firmly nodded and he sighed.
“you know what, whatever. i thought you’d understand, clearly, i was mistaken.”
you just stayed quiet and tried to think of why he would lie to you about it, but no matter how hard you thought about it, he wouldn’t benefit from telling you you’re a good player. so you decided to believe him.
“i- i don’t actually think you’re a useless player, either. the team wouldn’t have made it as far as it dd without you,” you confessed, fiddling with your fingers.
“yeah?” and oh, he sounded genuinely surprised and his face kind of brightened and oh.
“yeah, i just... i never knew why you would comment only on my plays and not the others’ and i kind of thought hurting you back would be a good way to deflect,” you said quietly, rubbing the back of your neck and avoiding his gaze.
“yeah, i admit, i could have been nicer about it but... i didn’t want to seem soft, you know. that’s not very impressive now, is it? and also, maybe i was kind of jealous of how talented you are,” he replied, smiling slightly. and- impress and be jealous of? impress who and why? you?
“i personally would have been more impressed, to be honest,” you said, finally meeting his eyes. “and the jealousy i can maybe understand, but why would you want to impress me?” you asked, confused.
“god, you’re lucky you’re so talented at volleyball, cause you can be a real dumbass sometimes,” he said, straightening up and turning his body towards you. “i wanted to impress you because you’re cute and delightfully annoying and i think the moment i first saw you i almost fainted and every goddamn thing nowadays reminds me of you and i wanted to get closer to you and kind of wanted you to see me in the same light i see you in.” everything kind of fell into place after he finished his speech; you finally could place why his pout irked you (it didn’t, what irked you was how cute you thought it was), why you wanted to cause him bodily harm (because, again, you were attracted to him and you subconsciously buried that deep down and thought instead of kissing him, punching would do more good) and why you worked on your mistakes after he pointed them out (it wasn’t spite, it was because you valued his opinion).
“and what light is that?” you asked, smiling widely.
“i- you’re really gonna make me say it?” you just nodded, trying to bite back a laugh. “i like you. there, happy?” he grumbled and you finally let the laugh bubble out of you. “what’s so funny?”
“we could have been dating for the past three years if you could have just chosen a different tone to call me out,” you replied, grinning.
“wait- you like me too?” he asked in disbelief.
“i’m like 99% sure i do,” you said.
“what about the remaining 1%?”
“well, i might need some confirmation. maybe a kiss? we’ll see if i can make it a hundred,” you replied cheekily and semi finally let out a laugh himself.
“don’t mind if i do,” he mumbled, taking your face into his hands and pulling you in for a kiss.
you have just closed your eyes and could feel his breath on your lips, when the door burst open. you tried to lean back, but semi held your face in place.
“uh- i-“ a very flustered ushijima started, “tendou asked me to check up on you two and i- i think i need to get back to- to practice. good day,” and with that, he closed the door again. both you and semi burst out laughing.
as your laughs dissolved into giggles, semi glanced down on your lips and you took a sharp breath. you were getting impatient.
taking matters into your own hands, you crashed your lips to his. you felt him smile into the kiss and you knew that the missing 1% has been added to the 99%.
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xxkellsvixen19xx · 4 years ago
Text
Merry-Go-Round Colson Baker X Reader
A/N: wrote this fic in 2019 with a different character revised it using Colson of course also changed up original title it was Addicted. Note there is drug use, overdose and death involved so this could be triggering for some. Might want to have tissues handy cause it's sad folks!
Warnings: drug use, overdose, death & smut 
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Word Count: 3,248
𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐁𝐨𝐛𝐛𝐲’𝐬 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐩𝐚𝐲 
𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧
𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲, 𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲, 𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐠𝐨 𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 
𝐈 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨𝐰𝐧 
𝐈 𝐝𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐰𝐧 
𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐠𝐨 𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝...
Y/N looked on in mute horror. Horror was something she had not felt before in her life. There he was, almost catatonic, a look of aloof disinterest on his otherwise flawless and beautiful face. In his left hand a small bottle was loosely clutched, open, contents scattered upon the ground below. His hair was dishevelled, his upper body unclothed, a trail of saliva dripping from his slightly-parted mouth onto his chest. His unblinking gaze stared at something beyond focus, something only he was seeing.
What what happened? She asked in a cautious whisper. She gently plucked the small bottle out of his hand, realising he had overdosed. Purposely overdosed. What could have happened to drive Colson  to such reckless, illogical behaviour? What drove this normally calm and deliberate person to such an abrupt, impromptu act? What demanded such drastic and permanent release?
It was too late. She knew it was too late. Not knowing what to do for such circumstances normally, Y/N only looked on helplessly, slowly crouching down by his side. She tentatively reached out and touched his bare shoulder.
Cold  both her fingertips and his skin. The two of them were both abnormally cool-blooded, he had penetrating and yet distant blue eyes,  tattooed skin and fine features. And yet he was colder than was normal for the two of them.He gave her no response, didn’t register her presence. 
Taking a firmer grip, she shook him gently, knowing he wouldn’t respond. He lost the balance from his precarious position, haphazardly propped against a fallen chair. His right arm, previously draped across a side of the chair, smacked the ground with a sickeningly final thud. She caught his head against her chest, his head lolling down and to the side as if he wanted to suck on her breast. He was heavier than she remembered. She couldn’t think of why this could be.
She cradled him, rocking back and forth slightly. A tightness grew in her stomach and throat, a cold shiver ran down her spine. Her breath was suddenly shaky and her mouth grew dry. A tear froze as it formed at the corner of her eye, falling and shattering upon impacting against the colder-still floor. “Colson… please please wake up,” she stated desperately.
She closed her mind thinking back to the first time they had met, both of them were junkies it seemed to be one of the few things that kept them together asides from the sex. They may have had a toxic relationship but like a moth to a flame she was drawn to him and she kept coming back for more.
2 years ago...
‘I need it so badly, and I need to see him, be near him.’
I want to find another dealer, but I can't bring myself to look. I just keep coming back.
I love him. I don't know if he knows it, but I do. With all of my heart.
I took my first fix to impress him. I don'tt care that I’m an addict; it gives me an excuse to see him.
And I do see him. Almost every day.
I let myself fall into the delusion that he loved me too, at first. When we met, in a bar, he gave me some crack. I liked it, of course, and he told me where I could see him and get more.
At first he just scared me, but gradually I started to look forward to going to see him to see him, as well as to get my fix.
I was a virgin. One night I gave that to him, and it was the best thing that ever happened to me. But when I woke up the next morning, he handed me about three weeks worth and told me I’d earned it all. I slapped him, but he just laughed and said he’d see me soon.
I held off the stuff for about a week, and then I couldn't do it anymore. It was even better than it had been the first time around.
When I ran out I went back to him, same as I always had before, with my money in my backpack.
He smirked, and told me I didn't need to give him any money, looking my body over knowingly. I was so tempted to do it. “Are you brave Y/N?” He asked me not taking his eyes off of mine. I looked at him nervously “why do you ask?” My stomach was tied in knots an excited feeling rushed through my veins.
“You want some of this?" He held up the small baggie to my eyes, which contained a fairly sized black hunk of something. I didn't have to ask him to know what it was.He had the sexiest face when he was offering you drugs, a straight, poker face, with a little smirk that just screamed "Come on, you know you want to,". I chewed at my bottom lip contemplating it for a moment. "Come on, it's the greatest feeling ever. I'll shoot it for you and everything, I guarantee you won't be able to move for the next hour, I swear. It's the best, no lie." Colson urged me. 
I hesitated slightly, my heart thundering against my ribs. Everything in my brain was screaming 'NO! You idiot! Remember health class?' "Awh hell, off to the races!" I said, laughing, and instantly feeling a rush of anxiety. Colson laughed, "Yeah, you want this," and then he pulled out a spoon from his pocket, breaking off a chunk of the black tar heroin and setting it in the spoon to melt it down. He was always so cocky, but it suited his personality.
My stomach was starting to feel funny from all the adrenaline pumping though my body as he patiently turned the black mass into a liquid; I hadn't felt this antsy since the last time we were tweaking out on shards. I couldn't believe I was about to do this; one hit and I could be addicted.
𝙎𝙤 𝙞𝙣 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙬𝙖𝙨 𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙨𝙤 𝙞𝙩 𝙘𝙖𝙢𝙚 
𝙉𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙝𝙖𝙙 𝙖 𝙨𝙞𝙡𝙫𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙤𝙣 𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙥𝙖𝙨𝙩 
𝙉𝙤𝙬 𝙖𝙩 𝙡𝙖𝙨𝙩, 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙨𝙥𝙤𝙤𝙣 𝙞𝙨 𝙥𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙨𝙤 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙤𝙮 𝙬𝙚𝙩 𝙞𝙩
Before I knew it, Colson had taken a hold of my left wrist and was holding my arm out straight, tapping against the main vein in my elbow until it was raised and throbbing.
"You're gonna want to look away for this," he said, as he held up a small syringe he'd filled with the drug. "This is gonna be like nothing you've ever felt before."
I smiled, and said "Hell yes," before I looked up into his eyes. He met my gaze, his blue eyes distracting me from where the needle was going. I felt the pinch, and winced slightly.
“You're ok, you will be ok Y/N," he said, he smiled, still staring into my eyes. "Eyes right here."
𝐁𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐫, 𝐬𝐡𝐞 𝐢𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞 
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐲 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐡𝐞’𝐬 𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐝, 𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐬 “𝐈 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐨𝐤𝐚𝐲?” 
𝐓𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐫𝐦 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐬 “𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲?!”
I stared back, smiled, and felt the needle being withdrawn from my arm. I exhaled slowly, wondering when it was supposed to take effect--
The rush of euphoria you get from shooting up heroin is unlike anything else. You could be going through horrible withdrawals, but after you see that red cloud of blood erupt in the syringe, you’ll feel like you're on top of the world in seconds. You feel weightless, and warm, and safe. 
“How you feeling Y/N?" Colson asked, getting down to my level to look me in the eye, his smirk setting my nerve endings on fire. ‘fuck why is it that his smirk damn near destroys me?’ I thought to myself. I tried to speak, but my mouth wasn't working with my brain...or, my brain wasn't working with my mouth. Actually, I don't think my brain was working at this point at all, it was all just too slow. Even my tongue felt heavy.
It seemed like a long time passed, I heard Colson opening up the small baggie once again, heard the lighter click to life, closed my eyes and felt my breathing, watching the colors dance past my eyes as I heard him hiss from the needle, heard the THUMP as he hit the floor.
A few moments had passed then I saw Colson get up from the floor, and plop down onto the end of the bed, smiling and looking down at me. I looked back up at him, and in my mind a vague feeling was starting to swim around, to spark to roaring life amidst the haze that I was feeling everywhere else.
“You feelin' good?" He asked, tilting his head and grinning at me in the way he always did after witnessing me getting fucked up in some way or another. A grin that said, 'Now that's what I'm talking about', before always asking the same question; You feeling good?
I tried to wrap my mind around how I was feeling, to grasp at how hot it was starting to feel between my legs, how when I arched my back upward I wanted something to be there, to be in the space between my legs, in the heat and the wet, to fill me up, make me moan.
And without really meaning to, I did moan. I let out a low, hungry growl, closing my eyes and allowing my head to fall backward. 
Colson chuckled, a low, almost animalistic sound. “Y/N...you want to fuck don't you?" I didn't respond, merely laid there, eyes still closed, feeling my head fall to the side, my nose against my right bicep. It was so hot, I could hear myself panting, feel it in my breasts as they rose and fell with my breath.
"Yeeeeeaaaaahh, you wanna fuck," I heard Colson say, his words long and drawn out. "You're so horny right now it's driving you out of your Goddamn mind, isn't it?"
I heard myself moan again, still unable to think my way out of the warm cloud that had settled over my body. All I knew was that I wanted a dick, a hard, long, thick dick, shoved into my pussy, and I wanted it now. I gave a small growl of frustration, arching my back upward again.
Colson takes hold of my wrist all of a sudden, forcing me to still. Then he lowers my arm, meeting my stare in the dimness of lamplight shining from a table. “You look like you have somethin’ you wanna say, Miss Y/N.” I bite the inside of my cheek. “Do I?” “Yeah. Do you?” “I – I.” I was unable to formulate a complete sentence. God he’s beautiful. I’m mesmerized. Enthralled. Captivated. Whatever this emotion of want is.
His blonde hair dusts across his forehead. Glazed in a sheen of sweat.“Oh…” I’m at a loss for words, so awestruck. He begins undressing himself,His hands are on his belt, undoing the buckle. His trousers sag some, slipping down his waist.I close the distance between us, pushing aside his trembling hands to use mine. I undo his belt then unfasten the button of his trousers, letting them fall around his ankles. 
Colson looks at me he holds my face in his big, calloused hands. “You can’t be real.” “No?” “No. You have to just be some illusion I’ve thought of. You’ll disappear soon.” “I don’t think I’m leaving, Colson,” I confess, voice breathless. His touch is like fire, letting me feel that more than I desire.
I flush with heat, taking in the truth that he’s naked now. Naked. In front of me.“You wanna join, darlin’?” “J – Join?” He gently traces his fingertips across my arm I can't help but shiver “yeah you look cold  guess even angels need warmth, huh?” he narrowed his gaze on me, he stretches out an arm to grab my wrist. He pulls me into him, sitting up to hold me in his strong arms. Heat blooms all over my skin as he embraces me from behind, sensations I had thought I lost or maybe never realized I had. 
He makes it seem like I have nothing to be afraid of. Nothing to do but relent, to surrender and release the tension I’ve been holding in. His breath warms my ear, tousling strands of hair. He moves closer, pinning me to the wall. I hold in all the breath I can as his scent overwhelms me, musk and oil and smoke. He has one arm over my head, bracing his position over me. His other hand rests near my abdomen, hovering over his shirt that I have on. His blue gaze doesn’t leave mine. “Can I touch you?” I blink, dark lashes fanning out tears. “I – I’ve never been touched like this.” “Never?” “No.” 'sure we had had sex before but this moment seemed different electrified. This was the first time he even really touched me at least like this… so soft, so sensual. 
“You – You don’t have to.” I managed to stutter out awkwardly. “I can. You look like you want me to. You have for a while. It doesn’t have to be more than this, and I don’t mind doin’ it for you.” His touch is like fire, as before. That tingling that I hunger for. The licks of heat over my skin sets my nerve endings on fire. His rough fingers slither over my slit, forcing me to let out a muffled noise as I shudder. “Want me to stop?” “No. No. More… do more.” 
He pushes closer, leaving no space amid us. His teeth sink into my throat, biting sensitive areas I didn’t know I wanted to be bitten. I arch my back, bending a little as he presses a knee between my thighs.He rubs, for a few minutes. Stroking. Caressing.He nibbles my neck, the muscle that runs down to my shoulder. His shirt falls off of me some, slipping off the shoulder his mouth is on. I rest my palms on his tatooed chest, nails scratching over his skin. He hisses then sucks beneath my ear, licking his tongue back and forth. “Oh, Colson,” I moan my breath becoming more rapid making me almost dizzy. 
He parts me with his fingers, rubbing the warm slick that’s dripping out of me. “God, Y/N. You moan like an angel.” He pushes one thick digit into me, then another. Stretching me, he thrusts in and out at a slow pace. I fall into a haze of bliss, drowned in the blazing sensations that wash over me. I move my hips in time with his hand, finding a tempo with him. A blinding crescendo rises and rises. Hotter. Brighter. ”I’m so close, so close –”  Then the flat of his thumb circles over my clit and I scream, coming undone.
This was an all new heightened sensation, and throughout our relationship it seemed the more we experimented with different drugs the more the sexual connection we had seemed to get more and more intense. Hell we were just as addicted to the sex as much as the drugs. To be honest I think we tried just about everything, Crystal meth, shrooms, coke, mollies you name it then most likely we had tried it. But it seemed like nothing was enough, another fix needed to keep the euphoric rush going. Each time more and more it seemed like he needed, like a junkie he couldn't seem to get enough. But it seemed heroin was always his vice, his ultimate fix of choice. 
Being on heroin is akin to being in a toxic relationship. You start off knowing you're playing with fire, but you tell yourself it’ll be casual and you have more will power than to let yourself fall into addiction. Unfortunately, the pull of heroin is stronger than you, and by the time you realize you’ve lost control, you already lost it a long time ago. This kind of end was not for the likes of him. In one long continuous movement she eased him to the ground, laying him on his back and lovingly straddled him. She had one hand pressed against his cold chest, the other gripping the handle of the blade. Her hand wavered a little as it hovered above his chest. She glanced away, eyes a little misted by tears that were unaccustomed to forming, and thus shy of coming out.
Die by the blade, she whispered barely audibly. He never was much of a fighter she was the warrior of unparalleled potential of the two of them and yet she believed, she knew, that he wouldn't want it any other way either.
With one efficient movement, she plunged the blade neatly into his heart. She opened her eyes with a start, sharply glancing down at him as she felt a tensing beneath her and the slightest of hitched gasps. His eyes, free of the madness, clear of the haze, looked back at her with such a whirlpool of emotions and questions she nearly choked on a gasp of her own. She felt a new horror. A new kind of chill. She couldn't find her voice, and wouldn't have known what to say anyway. She looked back into his eyes, silently pleading.
“Colson Baker?”
Questioning turned to acceptant understanding, forgiveness, and finally to a slightly guilty apology. The corner of his lips twitched into the briefest of smiles, as if trying to reassure her that everything would be fine.
“L-love,you.” 
His eyes glazed over again. This time he wouldn’t be waking up for her again. The crimson trickled over his skin and stained her sleeves and her skirts. Never had she made such a costly error of judgement. 
𝐃𝐚𝐦𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫 
𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐠 𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫
Colson Baker died of an overdose. A plaque in his memory was put up, reading, “There is no substitute” Unfortunately for music fans, as well as the family and friends of the victims, too many singers have died before their time either directly or indirectly because of drug use and abuse. 
Colson Baker
The raspy deep voiced rocker died at the age of 30,  from a heroin overdose.  Born Richard Colson Baker, but known as “Kells” to his friends and family, He is famous for some of the hit singles such as “Bloody Valentine,”My Ex's Bestfriend” “Forget Me Too,”  “Concert For Aliens,” and his personal  favorite, “Jawbreaker.”  In 2020, Rolling Stone magazine ranked him #46 on their list of the 100 Greatest Artists of All Time.
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the-acid-pear · 3 years ago
Text
Scarface was too fucking boring, didn't make it past chapter 3, but that's good, because that means Baki-Dou time 😍
Time to read the fourth book in this series! Excited to see Musashi <3
Chapter 1
COLORS
Baki please stop flexing
A FELLA SAYING THE SAME I SAID WHEN YUJIRO PULLED HIS SOB STORY, FR GO TRY SOMETHING ELSE! What happened with that whole "i don't care about fighting" eh Baki?!
Chapter 2
HOHO ALI JR???
ah no :/
HOLY FUCK is this quality bad!
He wants to taste defeat i see
TOKUGAWA PLEASE STOP SMOKING
Oh they removed the... Egg in the back of the neck, nice
God this guy's tits so fat 🥵
FINALLYYY HOW LONG SINCE WE SAW A FIGHT IN THE ARENA? A PROPER FIGHT I MEAN
Chapter 3
He doesn't even know 🐍
DON'T BRING THAT FELLA HERE RETSU KICKED HIS ASS IN TIME. RECORD
Oh i saw fanart of this scene
Baki, it's your fault that you are bored, you fucking teen
This shit boring ME
Chapter 4
Oh, goroukou is a title
I like how the prime minister is becoming a recurrent character
I thought he said babe for a sec-
That little "oh~" is a bit sus, are the old men... No, it can't be 😳😳😳
I'm fucking choking fuck
GOD ALMOST READ THAT AS JOHN CENA 😭
"yes <3"
These ppl never learn
Chapter 5
What a way to go, a la gamzee /j
This dude so weird lmao
FAHDGAHDH king
Dude he has huge round eyes tf you talking bout?
IGDUFSUEASEUURSS he's such a freakkk 😭😭😭
This is the most wtf thing Baki has pulled, remember when this was about fighters fighting? I don't know enough about science for this shit either man
Okay so their hug wasn't Tokugawa being touchy like he is, this guy is even worse, se juntaron el hambre y las ganas de comer HSHAFSFG
Chapter 6
Baki's dead
Katsumi about to kill get killed by my grandpa i see
ALSO KATSUMI OG HAIR WOOO
Katsumi bro don't be so happy over nearly killing him-
I love seeing him get better tho
Uwaadgsgsjdga 😍😳🤤 twisting my hair irl,,, 🥴
Finally Motobe remembered he was a character here 😐
FSGSHDAHDA KOSHO PLS
I LOVE that they got dark lips again
IM SORRY GOUKI HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT EVERYONE?! LTDKFsjyrd 😭
Jack's scar looks cool ngl
Retsu living the good life lmao
AND HOW DO YOU KNOW, GRANDPA?
Hana just doesn't care, smartest Baki character lmao
Idk what they talking bout but good for em <3
Cum basement
Chapter 7
SHOW US MUSASHI'S COCK
Obsessed he thought his heart was failing 😭
Dude you can just hear the heart beat of your friends/opponents just like that? 🤨
Notice Gaia in the top left 🥴
WHY CAN HE RECOGNIZE EACH OF THEIR HEARTBEATS AAHSGA
Thick 🥵
Unironically built different
Chronic back pain if you ask me, that's how I stand to relieve my agony
Did. Did you just call him a femb-
STOP SHOWING ME PANELS FROM VAGAMOND
I love John sm lmao
Mr Musashi has 2 (3?) dads
Chapter 8
HAIRY LEGS 🥴
Those things look like boobs
Bet you would know eh SHAFADB
They jerked off the mummy?
Reminds me of eye surgery
AFjshAFDGAJAHAF
Mf came out the tube ripped af 😭
Chapter 9
Everyone is so feminine lately good ol Kureha fell behind 😭
I like his bandana tho it's cute
OH HE TOO? AND HE'S NOT EVEN THAT STRONG
Fat tits 🥴
Eheojeudkshs 😖😳👉👈
JACK STOP YOU ARE BIG ENOUGH ALREADY
HOLY FUCK
You know like i understand Baki, he is at the highest he can be rn, NO ONE can defeat him, but the rest? Like c'mon y'all just beat each other up or something
Ah, the miracle of birth 😍
Chapter 10
I love how all these two do is hang out together in bars, boybosses
TF IS UP WITH THAT ICE? AHDHS
I love what they have
Hana thinking of getting his 4 limbs broken again i see
WOOO!! Nice cock Mr Musashi 😳
HANAYAMA PLEASE 😐
Chapter 11
I love those freaks
I just now I'm seeing the little scars on his cheeks from the fight with Spec ☺️
I love the fact that Musashi has hair in his legs BUT not his arms like ??? Okay king
Heated scientist moment
HOHO POGGERS 👀
Chapter 12
UTSURAARSDFAFA sibling goals
GIRLBOSS 😍
URAURUSYRSAESGA IN LOVE???
Holy shit she's amazing
Chapter 13
And his ass is very thick too 😳
Those fucking sunglasses, obsessed
Debatable, he got struck by lightning :/
HE WAXES HIS HAIR? OMFG OBSESSED
WHY IS HE WEARING THAT LMAO 😭
Nooo they censored the cock again 😔😔😔
DO IT QWEEN 💅
STOP SAYING SHE'S GONNA FUCK THE CLONE
"I'm exciteddddd" "ok."
Chapter 14
You just hate seeing a girlboss win
She truly is amaizing
Also i just realized spirits have been showing up since the first book so this isn't so crazy lol
MF HOW IS THAT GONNA HELP 😭😭😭
THE LITTLE BUBBLES AND SPARKLES... I BET HE DID 🥺
Chapter 15
WHY ARE HIS TITS SO ROUND AND FAT GODDAMN IT,,, 😳😖
Glad seeing some things never change
He looks so much like Jun
IGSITSURAURZES EPICCC
Someone question if Yujiro knew how too write obsessed,,,
Chapter 16
Goddamn it you got even older in the past 3 or so chapters bro
Mouth to mouth soul transference
OHHH
HIS EYEBROWS FELL HOW IGDUTSITDIYDIGD
Some mf got turned on by this HELP 😭
Chapter 17
I love how Yujiro and Hana are still getting ready to throw hands while this happens lol
Okay yeah that was super disrespectful honestly, guy is having a chat :/
HAHAGSJAHA obsessed
God i thought it was Hana the one grabbing some random lady for a second AFDJSJSSJS
He cute af ngl
POOR GUY MUST BE SO CONFUSED OMFG,,,
Fsr I'm surprised he can talk, like it should be obvious but in all the fanart i saw he never said a word, also, he's so damn respectful 😍
Chapter 18
Idk he was never that clever /hj
Hehehe blood
I love how John can only sit that way
The size of his balls lmao
Coward won't even fight with his dick out smh :/
God he mad cute-
Chapter 19
I MISS THE DEATH ROW FELLAS FUCKKK
Hm i think this random tiny bald man is not Tokugawa but someone that looks awfully similar to him
YEAH NO SHIT I FEEL SO BAD FOR HIM, HE MUST BE SO DAMN OVERWHELMED
Apparently there was a cameo, i don't know enough about anime to know or care
Chapter 20
He's tripping balls
Tokugawa should have gone a bit slower with this poor guy, this is like a lot to process at once <:/
Nvm he's doing better than me
Oydirsusefs look at himmm
WAIT A FUCKING SECOND OMFG DIDN'T DOPPO FIGHT THIS GUY?!
SOMEONE ELSE RECOGNIZED HIM HE ISSS
Chapter 21
OHDIRAYEASURRSUURS HE DOESN'T KNOWWW FFS
Musashi be like °_°
LOOK AT THAT SMILE LMAO
He's just chilling, mentally killing this dude
Murder baby
Chapter 21
The way his eyes are drawn is so cool
YRAURSUFSIDTGA
And he jokes too! Wow I'm in love 😍
(nsfw) CAN YOU HANDLE DICK LIKE THAT TOO? 😍
WOW
I TAKE BACK THAT QUESTION
I remember a show where you would bring your own knives and swords and go thru a bunch of test, Musashi should have been one of them
Mf truly is like :]
I love how he didn't buy it
I can't wait for him to fight Yujiro 😍
Chapter 23
He truly is 😌
ATFJAIDQYSF OBSESSED
He was happy this time at least, 5 times he lost already btw
Tokugawa truly in unhateable lmao
Chapter 24
IM SORRY, HIS LEG???
Oh I forgot Musashi does that
JAGSKSGSKSGS HIS FUCKING FACE I CAN'T 😭
I miss when translators would add notes i don't want to google shit myself :/
"I'm hard as rock" /j
Chapter 25
Look how happy he issss
MUSASHI POG MUSASHI POG-
I love how Tokugawa can't believe he got it first try and it's trying to lie now sjdakdyv
This mf is actually making me insane what the actual fuck i don't know what he has but he's gonna make me act up 😳
Mf be shadow boxing too dammit /j
Baki please
Chapter 26
OLD MAN JUST WANTS A PUBLIC TO SEE THIS LMAO
Look at the size of Baki's eyes holy fuck lmao
He's gonna yeet him!
OH NOOOO
FIRST HIS DAD NOW MUSASHI, THIS GUY CANT CATCH A BREAK LMAO
Chapter 27
How little time passed? They have barely moved
Yeah you did it last book too Baki
King shit
Chapter 28
AKSGSKGSJSGS KING
I love how he only now realized
Okay no he has a point
I love how he just calls him boy
Look at that smug face
I trust Musashi but at the same time he, really should be walking around this new world alone. Now, if i were to accompany him... 🥴/j
Baki please
Chapter 29
I love how soft the artstyle suddenly got, like if done big a big brush
Yujiro you just insulted every single anime character in history
Baby Baki's just like "Ok."
I like how Yujiro looks here
AUGHHJF HE'S SO BABY 🥺
HOHO badass
Chapter 30
He died 😔
Idiot hasn't even beat he 0.5 reaction seconds lmao 🤣
HOHOOOOO?!? 👁️👁️
"my curiosity exceed my fear!!" I RESPECT THIS MAN SO MUCH??
Chapter 31
AMAIZING HONESTLY
Fighter to fighter communication
SHIT LOOK AT THE STATE OF THAT HAND
He's just gone now LMAO
I honestly don't mind Baki being weak against this, he never fought against a two handed swordman, this is new territory
Chapter 32
Oh his really tripping balls now this is why he shouldn't be alone
NVM HE'S STILL DOING BETTER THAN ME ON A DAILY BASIS, I HAVE A LOT TO LEARN FROM THIS MAN
I just now realized he's barefoot
Nice ass king
The policemen are quite nice
He's very cooperative but i can't blame the cops either
Chapter 33
Yeah no shit that must be so insane
IF YOU HADN'T DROPPED OFF SCHOOL THEN...
That's kinda funny but idk man he's right i think
He's just like :3
I love how he isn't picking up a fight out of malice but rather just instinct like, he can't understand shit that is going on
YOU ARE SO RIGHT BAKI IT ISN'T BORING FOR ME EITHER
Chapter 34
Don't you fucking dare shave him Itagaki
It's funny how it took 2 books and a half for Baki to start being a protagonist
Holy fuck did Baki add height or is Miyamoto that big?
Wow how perfect i ran out of space just now!! Having fun with this book ngl :]
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snarkwriteswrasslin · 5 years ago
Text
FFT: spared but not forgiven; jon moxley
Notes:
So.. this is the second part to the FFT I just posted. And the more I read them, the more I wanna write this into an actual thing at some point, or at the very least, write more for these two. At any rate, here we go.
{ wanna send in one of these? here’s how | masterlist of fake fic titles | your days are numbered }
Summary:
Mox has managed to get Grace out of Shawn’s clutches. Now.. He has to make a stand for his Omega’s sake. Can he do that without spooking her?
Pairing:
Jon Moxley x OFC, Grace
Warnings:
heavily implied feral!alpha situation, mentions of a fight, fluff - if you squint aaaand alpha x omega dynamics.
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The door banged shut and the scent of him filled the room. The unease she’d felt a little while ago started to melt away. Grace was smart enough to be wary though. Mox wasn’t just any Alpha. Mox was one of the wild ones. There was no telling how he’d react to anything at any given moment. The last thing she wanted was to do or say something wrong.
She didn’t even realize she’d been holding her breath until he stepped up to her, hand reaching out and cupping her jawline. Like her, he was keeping a little distance. One quick scenting revealed that also like her, he wanted to be so much closer. He wanted no distance between them, but for whatever reason, Mox felt that keeping a little space between was safer.
Grace studied him intently, gaze fixed on baby blue eyes that almost seemed to glow neon in the semi darkened room. The breath she let out was ragged. Things were so intense right now. So up in the air. She had not one clue what was about to happen.
Truth be told, it both scared her and excited her. Mox seemed to pick up on the slight excitement in her scent and as  a result, that rugged smirk surfaced, tugging up the corners of his mouth. He stepped a little closer, not breaking her gaze.
“Goddamn.” the word was choked out in a hoarse whisper. The sound of his own voice almost threw him off and he raised a brow. She wanted him to get closer. She was okay with it, with him.. The thought shocked him to his core. The rumor going around about him, one that he didn’t bother trying to dispel, was that he was dangerous and he gave zero fucks.
… mine mine mine all mine…. Gonna treat ya so good, kitten…. Gonna take real good care of ya…. He didn’t dare say the words aloud not just yet. But the thought was there and it was taking hold, cementing in his brain. There was a light in his world now. The very thing he thought he’d never feel. He could feel it awakening.
Thick digits reached out cautiously again, caressing her face. Grace nuzzled against his fingers before she could reign herself in. She did the same, raising her hand, resting it against his stubble lined jaw. Mox nuzzled against her hand, almost as if he were trying to let her know that it was okay, she was safe now.
And god help him, she’d be staying safe.
Grace picked up on the shift of his mood and the result was her dropping her guard completely. One look into those glowing blue eyes of his drove home the fact that she had absolutely nothing to fear from him, ever.
She carefully pressed against him, staring up. “ Thank you.”
“For what, kitten?”
“For doing what you did… With Shawn.”
Mox’s fingers curled underneath her chin, tilting it up so that she didn’t drop her gaze. He shook his head and said quietly, “You don’t gotta worry about him anymore. I’m not gonna let him or anybody fuck with you. I mean it.”
It was probably the most she’d heard him say yet.
“I-I… I know.” Grace stared up at him, licking her lips. His music hit and he eyed her, sizing her up.
“If ya don’t wanna come down.”
“Oh, I’m going, Mox.” Grace took a deep breath, giving a look to the door. Mox nodded, pulling her closer. He pressed his lips against her forehead and mumbled quietly, “Let’s go then, hmm?”
Grace curled into his side and he slid his arm around her, pulling her even closer.
They made their way down the ramp and inside the ring, Shawn was jumping, practically snarling at Mox. Mox didn’t even give the man the grace of the ref ringing the bell, he just went in and started to attack, succumbing to the blind rage he felt earlier at the way he’d seen Shawn daring to treat his Omega.
He barely realized the match was over when Shawn tapped and the ref was raising his hand in victory.
He was going to get out of the ring, but he turned and strode back to Shawn where he lie on the mat, leaning down, pulling the other man up by his collar. “ If she hadn’t been out here, man? I’d fucking kill ya. It’s because of her ya still breathin. Think about that shit while you go on Twitter and bitch because I beat your ass.”
He stepped through the ropes, made his way to where Grace sat between JR and the other announcer, scooping her up out of the chair, wordlessly carrying her up the ramp.
“Are you… okay?”
“Everything’s perfect now, kitten. And I don’t think you gotta worry about Spears anymore.”
Grace rested her head against the crook of his neck, nuzzling her nose right against his pulse as she muttered a quiet “Thank God.” and held onto Mox just a little tighter. A lot had happened tonight but Grace finally felt free.
Safe.
And definitely happy.
Those weren’t things she’d really felt in a long time, either. And they definitely weren’t things she took lightly.
“Let’s get outta here.”
“Where you wanna go, kitten?”
“Anywhere you’re goin, Mox.”
Mox smirked and chuckled quietly. “Anywhere, huh?”
“Mhmm. I mean it. I’ll go anywhere.. As long as you’re with me. Just feels better.”
“I know what you mean, kitten. I know exactly what you mean.”
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nodesiretogrowup · 5 years ago
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ok, I think I’m ready for my in depth recap/analyse/review of today’s episodes, one by one
hopefully this shows up in the tag because my last few posts haven’t for some reason
Challenge of the Senior Junior Woodchucks!:
Frank-This season is about legacy. The first word we hear-LEGACY
The graduation ceremony took me back to my Girl Scout days. And is pretty accurate to the graduation ceremonies I did in scouts, though they had more levels. And the names of their ranks made more sense than the Girl Scout ones. Not sure how the Boy Scout ones work.
Poor Donald. Though from what we see in this episode, it might be better to not be a Woodchuck. They’re a bit...intense.
RETURN OF THE FANNY PACK
Launchpad’s notes were great. He totally wrote them, hence the grape jelly stain
THE LITTLE BABY SCOUTS ARE SO CUTE
The title is a lie. They’re trying to become Senior Woodchucks. And the challenge itself was called the Junior Woodchuck Wilderness Challenge
Poor Huey, that’s always awkward
DUCKTALES SAYS GAY RIGHTS
LENA SAYS GAY RIGHTS
Lena cheering Violet on was ADORABLE
The “I’m with Dad” shirts...chef’s kisses. I now want them to make NEVERENDING DAD JOKES
Vi’s little blush DAAAWWW
Why would Huey have seen her at scout events? I thought Violet had just moved to Duckburg, though I might be remembering wrong. Even then, Duckburg is a fairly large city she might have gone to events closer to where she lived
That fold out sash is DOPE
“DEWEY’S BROTHER!” Ouch, Launchpad.
Huey’s little wave
PROUD MAMA DELLA MODE ACTIVATED
DELLA’S IN THE THEME SONG! We all knew it would happen, but still. I NEED more Della/Launchpad interactions. They look like they’ll have a fun dynamic
He probably isn’t, but I’m gonna pretend that little asian scout is Russel from Up
Webby is a good friend
When Launchpad took Huey’s guidebook it reminded me a lot of whenever someone took the Journals away from Dipper. Complete with self doubt
Dewey is a horrible pep-talker
“Show the other nerds that you are king nerd.” Louie is actually a pretty good pep-talker. He could be a motivational speaker
I like Violet’s quirk of calling the others by their full name (ie Webbigail, Huebert)
Lena takes her new big sister role SERIOUSLY
I really like that the person Scrooge looks up to is a woman. And him sharing a room with his parents was a nice touch
“Story about Scrooge as a kid in 3..2..” Louie knows the formula (probably why he just accepted the sitcom lol)
The bee one made me laugh because alliteration...and bees
How did that map/painting work? It looked like she was actually holding it but the picture still looks fine after Scrooge peels the map off
“OOO, TWIST” I love you Della
I love the Tittertwill and its song and dance. I want it as my ringtone. And I want plushies. STAT
“I’m speechifying” I’m gonna use that next time someone interrupts me
I hope someone gets a good screencap of that post. I want to see what all is on there
Violet trash-talking is ADORABLE. She wants to fit in
“CALL HIM A CLOWN!”
When they tried handshaking...too cute! I don’t really like shipping the kids because of how young they are and that they haven’t had much experience in the crush/romance department...but Huey and Violet are adorable and I think they both have crushes on each other
I kind of wonder what Launchpad was doing while everything was going on. Also he looks SO HOT in that uniform
I didn’t notice it the first time, but all three groups took a different path. Neat
I got upset when Huey used his water bottle to make a compass. Now that lid is dirty and the rest of your water will spill
Violet dots her i’s with a Mickey. The note also made me think of the halfway there joke in an episode of Spongebob
“Do you feel appropriately razzed?” This girl is too sweet
Huey going back to pick up the note so he doesn’t litter
The little growls Donald was doing while swatting at the mosquito were cute. Also FUCK MOSQUITOS
Dewey INSTANTLY forming a connection with the bird is great
“Aw, they’re both cute” My thoughts exactly
“It’s JUST a mosquito, you should give it some of your blood”
I like that over the episode we see Huey continue to forgo the rules to try and boost his chance of winning while Violet follows them
WHY THE FUCK IS THERE LIGHTNING RAIN?!
In Huey’s panic he forgets what he knows. I feel like that’s gonna come back
“That was the smack-talking” Vi is extra adorable in this episode
Webby’s disappointment in the lack of actual giants, cute
Donald and Della should start a slapstick comedy duo
“YOU WANT US TO FOLLOW YOU ON A BRAND NEW ADVENTURE, WELL LET’S GO”
I love when Huey sings
Huey needs to see a therapist cuz that shit ain’t normal
I like him giving the guidebook a soothing, southern voice. Did anyone else think of Ratatouille when the book showed up? Like how Remy imagined Chef Gusto
“Well that’s a pickle of a different color” Oh southerns and your weird expressions
My sister kept saying that the bear looked like it was mixed with a hyena and I can totally see it. Maybe he’s a lost Wuzzle lol
“THAT BEAR DON’T CARE FOR BOOK LEARNIN"
“I’m the food"
VIOLET HAS A KNIFE
Even though I knew it would happen, I was still very disappointed in Huey for not helping Violet. That’s a dick move
“CURSE MY FLAWLESS SLAMS”
God, poor Donald
WHY DO YOU WANT YOUR FAMILY TO DIE, SCROOGE?
I love how blunt Louie is
“EVERYONE FOLLOW THAT BIRD” *Blue Bird of Happiness flashbacks*
WHY THE FLYING FUCK IS THE LAST MARKER IN A GODDAMN ACTIVE VOLCANO?! 
“Where you go I cannot follow” I love JW
“I DON’T KNOW, I’M GONNA THROW THIS ROCK” That’s how I solve my problems
HUEY’S LOSING HIS GODDAMN MIND
“I’m so mad I can’t even aliterrate”
“I’m cold and terrified, sounds like an adventure to me”
“Poppycock, whoever told you that?” “YOU”
“So let’s rewrite history” That was last season, Dewey
Scrooge doing the song and dance was great
“WHAT IS HAPPENING?!” “I DON’T KNOW, WHY ARE YOU IMAGINING THIS?!” That’s some fucked up shit right there
“Wait, there’s a failure badge?” I would like one
I’m glad they clarified that the challenge isn’t a one time only thing because I was confused
I like that this show included the lesson that it’s ok to fail. I still struggle with that to this day
Violet opening up to Huey is sweet. And offering to share the win. She’s a good noodle
“I thought this would be more climatic” BITCH YOU IN THE MIDDLE OF AN ACTIVE VOLCANO! WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?
“I RESPOND TO AUTHORITY” And she just pats him on the head
“LAUNCHPAD?!” “LAUNCHPAD?!” “Hey, I’m Launchpad” COMEDY GOLD
I KNEW DELLA WAS GONNA BE THAT MOM! I NEED MORE OF IT!
“YEAH, CUZ YOUR A...” “Lena, please”
Launchpad giving Huey one of his failure badges is kind of adorable. Though I thought you could only earn one of each badge. Then again they have a failure badge so normal scout rules probably don’t apply here
Dude, that DEATH GLARE Della gives Launchpad. Something tells me this isn’t over yet. I hope this means Della is gonna see Launchpad as her Sitcom Nemesis while he’s completely unaware of it. Like DW and Gizmoduck
The Sabrewing family is ADORABLE and MOST BE PROTECTED AT ALL COSTS
JW returning as a ghost. I’m not sure if that’s funny or dark
I feel like the Duck family finding the journal is...unfair in a way. Like Violet got to become the Senior Woodchuck but Huey and his family are gonna find tons of treasure/get rich and famous
I think we’ve got some future episode titles in there
I thought Goldie said she found the fountain of youth, why was it in the journal
“MY NAME IS DEWEY”
OMG FOWL!!! I think it’s funny that Phantom Blot is still wearing his FunZone mascot costume
And now we know what this season’s goal is
Seeing Della with her family was great. Like everyone has said, it feels like she was meant to be there the whole time. Her and Donald were great. It was nice to see them being all sibling-y. I heard that this wasn’t intended to be the season opener but you could of fooled me. This sets up everything so nicely for the season. Huey is going to question who he is and what defines him. We have a list of treasures to be discovered. And we see the FOWL are after those treasures too. This was a solid season opener that has me excited for the journey ahead.
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