#also the games monday 12 am for me so i always debate what day i should actually put lmao

[chasedeys]

happy i’ve been with him the past six years of my life game day sunday 🥳🥳🥳

[missmonsters2]

Songs For You

Requester: @thatgirlwholikesgirls 💘

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x fem!reader/OFC

Prompt: “I’m in love with you.”/“Are you finally confessing to me? Because I feel the same way.” 

Note: The dream scenario haHA. Thanks for sending this in 💘

Warnings: heart palpitations.

Translation: Пойдем со мной, Ванда. Нам нужно поговорить - Come with me, Wanda. We need to talk.

Genre: Fluff

Count: 4627

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It only takes 12 songs for you to fall in love with Wanda.

Of course, it's over the course of one year, but nonetheless, she becomes every song to you.

It starts on December 31, New Year's Eve. You're really on the cusp of New Year's as it's 11:45 PM.

You're stuck at the university, getting all the reports done on a tight deadline. You let your colleagues who are teaching the same course as you go on the count that they all have a family to celebrate with, and all that's waiting at home for you is your cat.

And not to diss your cat, but he doesn't even know what New Years is.

You call it a night, leaving just a couple more reports for when the holidays are over. It isn't until you're leaving your office that you see someone standing there and nearly have a fucking heart attack.

"WHAT THE FUC–" You nearly scream, ready to throw your bag at the person and call 911.

"WAIT, WAIT, WAIT—Pietro let me in!" The person exclaims while holding their hands out in front of them to both calm you down and also shield themselves if you did throw your bag at them.

You pause momentarily when you hear his name because Pietro is the professor for Business Entrepreneurship.

You're pretty good friends with him. He would say you're kind of too quiet and a smidge prickly, but he was lighthearted with you. He jokes around all the time that the two of you are bound to start dating, and you're just playing the long game. He's relatively pretty harmless in his advances. He likes to joke and laugh, and you find that's easy to be around. 

The girl standing there stands straight, clearing her throat when she realizes you're not going to attack her.

She says your name and asks if you're her.

"Yeah, that's me…" You nod, unsure.

And then she bursts into song. 

You're mortified that she's singing Fireworks by Katy Perry while you can see fireworks being shot in the sky in the distance as it hits midnight.

When she finishes, she smiles tentatively at you.

"Happy New Year's," she hands you a card.

"…Thanks," You say dumbly, 

"Happy New Year's to you too…?"

"Wanda," she introduces herself and then gives you an awkward wave before leaving.

You're not sure what the hell just happened, but you look down at the card and open it.

Happy New Year's! - Pietro

You roll your eyes and send him a text as you leave the building, the girl was long gone.

You: Next time, maybe warn me because that girl almost went to jail because of you.

Pietro: Surprises are more fun!

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The next time you're at work, you punch Pietro in the arm while he laughs.

You tell him how that girl was very close to getting a concussion and going to jail.

But he just laughs out, "It wouldn't be her first time."

Then you find out that is his twin sister.

The incident is long forgotten with school getting busy, and the students are buzzing around for the reading week break before their midterms.

It isn't until Valentine's day when you're sitting out in the university park on the grass, enjoying the sun and slight breeze that Wanda shows up again.

Only now it's even worse because there are many students out here as well studying.

She's standing in front of you, in a cupid's costume you would say is a little inappropriate, but fuck, she's got excellent legs.

"Please don't," you whisper in horror, but Wanda merely smiles apologetically because she can see Pietro standing in the far distance for this performance.

And then she's belting out Stereo Hearts by Gym Class Heroes, and honestly, you can't even control your face to stop the grimace that comes.

But you admit, you're impressed by Wanda's rapping.

You try not to flush red as every student in the vicinity has their eye on you. 

When Wanda finishes, she's about you hand you a card when you grasp her hand and pull her down until she's eye level with you.

"Is this going to be a regular occurrence?" You ask her, the smell of cinnamon and oranges invading your senses pleasantly.

Wanda smirks, and you're not sure if anyone should look that good smirking.

"Well, perhaps you should ask my brother as he's got 10 more songs lined up for you," Her eyes travel past you, and you turn to see what she's looking at.

Pietro is standing in the distance, waving his arms enthusiastically, and you sigh.

You turn back and see Wanda's big, green eyes staring back at you, and you're not sure if it's because you're not in a panicked state that you notice her accent a lot more.

You find it interesting as Pietro has started to lose his, but his sister's accent was still strong (and sexy).

You take the card in her hand, and let go of her hand as you realized you're still holding it.

"I'm assuming the next one is St. Patrick's Day?" You softly quirk your lip up.

Wanda merely smiles, giving you an answer without saying anything. 

"Right," you tap the grass with the card twice, and Wanda gets up with a small wave to you and her brother before leaving campus. 

You turn back to Pietro, who is giving you a goofy smile, and you shake your head at him.

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March comes quicker than you'd like. It's been pretty hectic with papers and projects due, you hardly have time to think about the impending song-o-gram.

You do try to tell Pietro to stop and maybe save money, but he boasts about how he has a family discount. 

Then you begin to wonder why Wanda has such an odd job in the first place.

Also, how does she know where you'll be?

Does Pietro just share your location with Wanda?

You do debate hiding from Wanda so she can't sing. Although you have no qualms in admitting her voice is beautiful, the songs Pietro picks are just not resonating with you.

But it's St. Patrick's Day, and you're planning to let your students go early so they can go have their fun after their latest project. 

"Okay," you turn to your class with a smile, "I suppose you can all--"

There's a knock on the door. 

Your brows furrow as one of your students opens the door.

And there she is again.

In all her green glory (and a cute leprechaun hat).

The students all turn their heads to look at you.

And you know it looks strange.

"Class...dismissed."

Your students groan as they want to stay and watch the debacle because it's well known now how you've been getting song-o-grams.

Luckily, no one knows who the sender is. 

Your students shuffle out the door, some give lingering looks to Wanda.

When it's finally just the two of you in the room, you lean against your desk with your arm crossed.

"Do you always put this much effort into your song requests?" You look again with her black tights with fishnet tights over those and a little green dress.

"It definitely costs extra, and my brother aims to please," Wanda adjusts her hat. 

You chuckle because Pietro is an overachiever.

"Alright," you sit fully on your desk, "want to make a side deal with me?"

Wanda looks at you curiously.

"Can we skip the song?" You plead.

"You don't like my singing?" Wanda pouts, and you immediately panic.

"No!" You exclaim, but huff when you see Wanda giving you a teasing smile. 

"I just," you breathe, "the singing brings a lot of attention. Not entirely what I'm comfortable with being new to the school."

Wanda nods.

"Well," she smiles, "I'm open to negotiations in place of a song."

"What can we barter?"

"I won't say no to coffee," Wanda says, and you laugh.

"Coffee I can do. Any particular place you like?" You get off the desk. 

"I like the coffee shop across the university," Wanda opens the door, and the two of you exit together.

You kind of like the fact that Wanda is unbothered about the fact that people stare at her.

Buying Wanda coffee is a pleasant affair. Instead of suffering through a song, you get to know her instead. 

Apparently, the song-o-gram gig is just a part-time day job as at night, Wanda actually owns a bar near the university. 

"I mean, you clearly don't need to do this, so why?" You ask her.

"Keeps me busy during the day," Wanda shrugs.

You have a fleeting thought on how to tell Wanda other ways she can keep herself busy, but she seems to enjoy herself, so you keep strolling along. 

"You have to admit, though," you grin as you stop and turn toward's her, "This is way better than singing, isn't it?"

"You're starting to sound like a music hater," she grins back.

"Not at all, but I will pass on...what did you say it was again Pietro picked?"

"Buy U A Drank by T-Pain," Wanda smirks, and you sigh, smiling back at her.

"Yeah, back to my point, I'll pass."

The coffee outing ends with Wanda giving you another card, but you're left with the sound of her laughter stuck in your head.

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Coffee becomes a regular thing for you, and not just on the days Wanda is sent to sing to you.

You find yourself bumping into her often at 2 PM on Mondays and Wednesdays, and 10 AM on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

The arrangement works out better than anything. Instead of songs, Wanda tells you stories about song-o-grams that she has to do. Many of them being way weirder than her showing up at midnight in your empty office on New Year's.

Still, she will let you know what song she was supposed to sing and laughs when you crinkle your nose.

The next time Wanda comes in with a Canadian flag costume and patriotically sings Baby by Justin Bieber.

"What does that even have to do with Canada day?" You grumble.

"He's Canadian," Wanda shrugs.

You're barely half-listening as you text Pietro.

You: Bieber...really?

Pietro: We're all Beliebers, don't lie.

"What happened to our arrangement?" You lick your lips.

"Pietro wanted video proof I sang you a Bieber song," Wanda waves her phone lightly in her hand to show you.

You sigh, "You owe me coffee for subjecting me to that." 

"Hey, just doing my job, but I will still so kindly buy you coffee," Wanda smiles as the two of you make your way to the coffee shop.

You notice a lot of people giving Wanda weird looks, but in their defense, she's wearing a Canadian flag.

You take off your blazer and place it around her shoulders. She pauses, holding the blazer as she looks at you. 

"Maybe waving the Canadian flag around when it's almost July 4th isn't such a great idea," you quirk your lip at her, causing her to slowly smile back.

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You see Wanda sooner than you think you would because now it's July 4th, and Wanda has come to drag you out to the beach.

"It'll be a fun party with food. You need food," Wanda tries to bribe you. School's been out for a while, but you got your next semester lined up already, so you've been focusing on making lesson plans and what projects and assignments there will be. 

You just want to finish it as soon as possible, so you don't have to worry about it later, and if the result of that is that you can spend more time with Wanda, you weren't complaining. 

So, somehow you made it to the beach in your zombie induced haze. You'll give it to Wanda that the sun does feel nice along with the mist from the ocean.

You see, Pietro in the distance playing frisbee with his friends that you've yet to meet. The smell of barbeque hits your nose, and you can't even stop the growl that comes out of your stomach.

"Shut up," you say to Wanda when you catch her smirk. 

Wanda's got your beachwear ready somehow (you don't even want to know how she knew your chest size), but you still opt to keep your dress shirt on, unbuttoned, and all.

You get introduced to Clint, Natasha, Steve, Bruce, Thor, Tony, Pepper, god the list went on, you can't even keep track.

At least not with your brain feeling like mush.

You inhale the burgers Steve grilled, getting a little bit of everything on your plate, a little more than you would typically eat, but you notice that Wanda has a habit of taking food off your plate.

"Want to go in the water?" Wanda asks as she slides next to you on the towel under the umbrella.

"Can I take a 30-minute nap?" You sleepily ask, but you're already lying on your back, someone's sunhat on your face.

You're not sure if you're already asleep, and dreaming, but you feel a feather-light brush through your hair.

"We can do whatever you want," you hear, a melody that travels through your dreams.

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True to your word, you do wake up roughly 30-minutes later and find that Wanda is still sitting beside you book in hand.

The slight movement draws her attention.

"Awake?" She turns back to her book to finish the page.

You make a noise that barely sounds human. 

"What are you reading?" You rasp.

"I was reading The Lion, Witch, and the Wardrobe," Wanda slides a receipt slip in as a bookmark before she closes it. She hands you some water, which you gratefully take as you sit up.

The cold liquid rejuvenates your throat, and you feel a little more awake. 

"Classic, I loved that book," you grin as you throw the water bottle to the side. 

You look around to see Pietro and his friends playing volleyball, and you stretch, looking back to Wanda to see she's smiling lightly at you.

"So?" You start to get up, holding your hand out to her, "Want to go play in the water?"

You grimace a little because you sound like a 5-year-old asking your crush to go play with you, but Wanda just laughs and grabs your hand.

Wanda is an excellent swimmer, and she's mischievous as hell because she'll splash water at you, and also swim underneath to grab your leg and scare you. 

The day passing by incredibly fast, the evening coming with another round of barbeque and roasted marshmallows over a bonfire.

"Wanda," you call as you're sitting next to her. 

She seems like she's really focused,

"Hm?" She hums.

"Your marshmallow is burning and on fire," you say, looking at her treat that has become a black crisp.

You're sure if she peels off the layer, it'll be fine, but...

Wanda sighs, throwing the treat in the garbage.

"Marshmallows suck, they aren't even that good anyway..." she mumbles, and you can't help but chuckle.

You hand over your roasting stick with a perfectly roasted marshmallow on it, a little dark chocolate drizzled on it.

"They're delicious, and you know it," you tease, beginning to roast another one.

Honestly, it doesn't even occur to you that you're roasting double the marshmallows and only eating a third of it. 

But this whole day, it never even crossed your mind that you hate sharing food, and you've been doing that all day with Wanda.

After that, everyone settles on their own blanket, you sharing with Wanda on one side, and Pietro on the other as you wait for the fireworks.

"No song today?" You turn to Pietro with a smirk, "That's disappointing."

He laughs as he shakes his head, "A little eager for my love songs, huh? Well, don't worry. There's actually something planned."

You whip your head back around to Wanda, who's whistling. 

"What's the song?" You demand the two of them.

"A classic, baby!" Pietro hoots. "Firework by Katy Perry!"

Your brows furrow.

"Pietro, you already did that one in January,"  you recall.

Pietro squints before groaning as he looks over you to his sister.

"Wanda! Why didn't you tell me?" He accuses her as she shrugs.

"That costs extra," she merely says, and you can't help but laugh.

"Well, I paid for a goddamn song, so sing something else!" Pietro huffs, while Wanda smirks at him.

"She's not even going to hear it over the fireworks, Pietro," Wanda points out.

"Sing louder than the fireworks, duh," Pietro says like it's the most obvious thing in the world. 

Wanda rolls her eyes but doesn't say anything as the fireworks show begins.

"Any requests?" Wanda says in her your ear, her breath causing you to shiver.

You turn your head, your lips are shockingly close to hers. "Why don't you sing something you'd think I'd enjoy?"

Wanda smiles because over the time she's gotten to know you, she knows exactly your taste, even your guilty pleasure songs.

And with everyone too busy watching the firework show, Wanda leans closer, her breath on the shell of your ear.

"🎶It's a beautiful night, we're looking for something dumb to do. Hey baby, I think I wanna marry you. Is it the look in your eyes, or is it this dancing juice. Who cares baby, I think I wanna marry you 🎶"

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

You think something has changed since Independence Day.

Looking has turned to gazing.

Walking side by side has turned into brushing pinkies.

Hanging out during the day has turned to hanging out at night at Wanda's bar as well.

And no longer singing Pietro's songs has turned to Wanda singing songs she thinks you'd enjoy.

It's a wonderful end of Friday at 2AM, the bar has closed as you walk out with Wanda. It was Karaoke night, so Wanda's leaving with an ukulele, still strumming tunes on it as you walk her home.

"I forgot I owe you a song today," Wanda tunes the ukulele as you reach her place. The two of you take a seat on the steps of her door, huddling close to keep from the autumn breeze.

"Wait, what was the song supposed to be?" You ask with a smile.

"Sucker by the Jonas Brothers," she answers as she finishes her tuning.

You hum. It wasn't an awful choice, and you would listen to it if it came on the radio. 

Wanda turns to you, her lips in that smirk that seems to make your heart skip a beat involuntarily. 

She's strumming on the ukulele, and you recognize the tune to be Kiss Me by The Sixpence None The Richer.

It's something you can't explain. Your stomach is doing flips like it belongs in the acrobatics, and Wanda is looking at you while she sings it.

Her eyes are soft, and you think she's getting closer only to realize it's you leaning in.

And when the song comes to an end, and Wanda isn't backing away, you lean all the way over, capturing her lips in a soft kiss.

Her lips are warm and taste a little like rum from the bar, but God, she tastes wonderful.

She tastes like the best love song there is, a song that doesn't exist yet but has certainly made it to your heart.

And when you pull back, Wanda smiles.

“I’m in love with you,” you breathe.

"Are you finally confessing to me?" Wanda puts her arm around the back of your neck to pull you in for another kiss, “Because I feel the same way.”

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

Do you ever think about how when you have a crush on someone, the world just seems a little brighter, the songs on the radio sound a little sweeter, even your coffee taste a little better?

Even though school has started again, you've been flying on cloud 9 with the amount of time you've spent with Wanda. 

Kissing has become one of your favorite pastimes. 

Even the way Wanda moans when you kiss her throat sounds like a song. 

It's Halloween, and everything has been progressing perfectly.

"We should tell, Pietro, we can't put it off anymore," you tell Wanda as you help her zip up her costume.

There's a party being hosted at Tony's, and you're getting just a little tired of sneaking around.

Well, you were also really reluctant to tell Pietro you've fallen for his twin sister, but it's not like feelings can be controlled.

Wanda sighs, "I know. We'll find a time to tell him."

You leave it at that because you know Wanda is more stressed about it than anyone, feeling like she's betrayed him.

You have to admit, Tony throws a party like no one else. The entire house is decked out Halloween themed style.

There's even a cauldron that has mist coming out of it. 

It's incredibly crowded, but you spot Pietro and his group of friends in the kitchen doing shots together.

"Ah, you made it!" Pietro shouts as he pulls you in for a hug, lifting you off the ground and spinning around. 

"You drunk?" You ask him with a laugh and brow raised.

"Oh, it's going to take a hell of a lot more than this to get me drunk. This isn't even real vodka," he says, and Tony huffs.

"You idiots drank all the real vodka before the party started," Tony is in some kind of red and yellow metal suit for a costume.

"I even have a song prepared for you today," Pietro grins, and you laugh.

"No days off for your sister, huh? You're a real slave driver," you tease, and he laughs.

"Don't pity her too hard, I'm singing it too," Pietro says proudly with his chest puffed.

"No," you whisper in shock, but Pietro just laughs while Wanda sighs.

True to his words, there's a stage set up in the main room, lights starting as someone comes up to introduce the group.

"Is it a good song, at least?" You ask Wanda, who looks unhappy, she has to go up there.

"Depends," Wanda shifts from one heel to another as she gets ready to go up on stage, "Do you like 2009 Lady Gaga?"

You don't even get a chance to say,  "Oh No," as Wanda is already on the stage.

Pietro points at you in the crowd, mouthing, "For you," with a wink, as you shake your head.

The music comes on, and you recognize it as Monster by Lady Gaga.

You're definitely not sure if this is a song siblings should sing together, although it's not as bad with backup dancers there as well.

When the song finishes, you merely shake your head, clapping along with everyone else.

"You're an absolute dumbass," you tell Pietro, who just laughs.

The rest of the night goes on with drinking, games, and dancing.

There are people apple bobbing, and there's candy everywhere.

It isn't until Wanda is pulling you upstairs, pulling you into the washroom as she shuts the door, that she wraps her arm around you.

"Overwhelming, isn't it?" She asks, and you love that she just knows.

You're leaning against the sink, body humming with Wanda's lip pressed against your collarbone.

You can hear the music thumping through the washroom walls and door, and you can't help but tap the beat against Wanda's spine.

"🎶Here we go again," Wanda huskily sings as she brushes her lips against your skin, trailing upwards until she's at your lips, "I kinda wanna be more than friends, so take it easy on me, I'm afraid you're never satisfied 🎶"

She never gets to finish the song as your leap your head forward, kissing her roughly as you grab onto her hips to pull her closer to you, your leg between her thighs.

"What the hell!" 

The voice interrupts the two of you as you see Pietro has stumbled in, looking shocked, and a little red in the face.

"What's going on here?" He looks between the two of you as you separate, the guilt seeping into the two of you.

Of all the ways you wanted Pietro to find out, this was not one of them. 

"So...I'm kind of in love with and dating your sister," you tell Pietro since there's really no other way to break the news to him now. 

"Are you serious?" Pietro says, and you feel awful because this is the most serious you've ever seen him.

He looks at Wanda.

"Are you telling me that I've been spending money and paying my sister to serenade you for me, but you fell in love with her?" He's glaring at his sister, and she frowns.

"Пойдем со мной, Ванда. Нам нужно поговорить," Pietro says in Russian that you can't understand.

Wanda sighs, nodding, but she turns to you first, squeezing your hand.

"I'll be back, meet me downstairs," she tells you. You want to protest because it wasn't just Wanda that hurt Pietro, but you hold your tongue.

You pass by Pietro, staring at him a second longer before you make it out and back downstairs. It's a little too hard to be in the mood to dance while you're waiting for Wanda.

It's probably a good half hour before Wanda comes back. She doesn't look distraught, so it must've been okay. 

You look at her questioningly, but she merely nods and smiles.

At the end of the night, Wanda has way too many drinks, and you're holding her up as you wait for a cab.

"Hey."

You half turn to see who's there when you see Pietro.

"Hey," you say softly. 

You see him staring at Wanda, and you tilt your head.

"We cool?" You ask.

It takes an extra second for Pietro to respond, but he eventually nods.

"I'm a little wounded. I was pretty convinced we were going to be like a 1985 romance movie, but yeah, we're cool. I'm totally getting Wanda to refund me, though," he smiles.

"Stingy," you snicker. 

And when he's got that goofy smile on his face, you know it's all going to be okay.

⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷

The rest of the year passes by with a blur. You happily tell Wanda and Pietro that you got a permanent role with the university, and get one last song-o-gram from them.

After that, Wanda quits the part-time job of singing songs to people and gets a part-time job at the coffee shop that the two of you like.

"I need to keep busy," Wanda tells you when you question why she needs another part-time job after the song-o-gram.

"It's either that, or I'll sit in on your lectures," she gives you a sly smirk.

And you're tempted for a moment.

It's December 31st, 11:59 PM, and the two of you are sitting in your office, and it feels like the first time you met Wanda.

"Sing me a song?" You ask her as she sits in your lap.

"Hm," she hums, "Maybe I should sing you Fireworks by Katy Perry again. You'd like that, wouldn't you?"

She's teasing, but you can't help but smile.

"If you're singing it, any song in the world is wonderful."

Wanda looks at you for a moment, licking her lips. 

"Hm," she hums, "I got a different song in mind."

You tilt your head, but Wanda swoops down, biting on your earlobe, eliciting the exact response she wanted from you.

"🎶'Cause I'm having night visions of you and me on the edge of my bed...🎶" she sings in your ear, and your eyes flutter shut.

Truly, Wanda can sing anything as long as they're songs for you.

[rosesnink]

Fit For A Queen (Elliott Sinclaire)

A/N: Phew this must be the first OC one shot I make and not D&D centric! Lol. Anyways I loooved writing this OC of mine that I know y’all love with all your hearts. Love me some Elliott content, eh? Also, go gays 

Summary: Elliott was born a special boy. How he manages that knowledge is up to him. 

Word Count: 3433 

The day that Elliott Sinclaire was born, it brought great joy to Ernest and Hayley, and Alaska couldn’t be happier.

They decided to name him after their favourite movie character, Billy Elliott, the movie they bonded over when Hayley was 14. They went home days after, happy and excited to have their long-awaited boy.

During the first two years of age, Elliott was an emotionally smart boy who always laughed and gave his parents a few more hours of sleep, and a loved brother by his older sister, Alaska, who was three years older than him. She always knew she’d have a brother ever since her mother told her that they’d have another bundle of joy.

When he was three, Hayley knew that he was different in a pleasant way.

She was doing her make-up for a military gala when she heard small footsteps approaching her, eyes big and curious “Mama, what is that red thing?” He pointed at the bar on her lips. She smiled at him.

“It’s lipstick, but it’s too strong for you. Do you want to try on some?”.

His eyes lit up with eagerness “Yes, please!”.

She smiled wide and reached a coral pink for him and said “Say ‘a’” He did as instructed and she applied carefully the lipstick on his thin lips and beamed at the result as she lifted him at the height of the mirror, a proud smile on her face “Like what you see?”.

“Yes! Thanks, Mommy, you’re the best!” He hugged her and she kissed his head, growing and growing with messy, blonde hair.

“What are you two plotting now?” His father’s question made him tense. He has heard some stories of fathers going nuts because some boys had tried to be ‘girly’.

“My love, look at him! He looks handsome, doesn’t he?” His mother beamed.

Ernest knelt down to examine his boy better and then smiled widely, ruffling his hair “You look great, my boy”.

“Really? Aren’t you mad, Papa?”.

“Why would I? There’s nothing wrong on being feminine or doing something ‘like a girl’. In fact, you’re being very brave”.

“I… Am?”.

Hayley was smiling, eyes glistening with emotion.

“Yes. You are being unapologetically yourself, and that is a brave trait of yours. You’re being braver than me when I was your age”.

The boy stood there before hugging his father, telling him how much he loved him “Thank you, Papa”.

He cupped his son’s face in his and said “Never be afraid nor ashamed of being yourself and demand being respected with love and respect, because it’s a human right, alright?”.

“Yes, Dad”.

“Besides, you’re doing no harm to anyone!” Hayley commented, a smile on her face.

Growing up being ‘feminine’ was at first hard. There were some bullies who’d scream when Elliott was either walking or doing an exposition ‘fag!’ and everyone would laugh.

Every night, Hayley or Ernest would talk to him, telling him how beautiful and valid he was, no matter what other people said. Even Alaska would tell him how much she loved him and admired him.

The rest of the family noticed this, especially Bart and Vincent, who would show him off to boost his confidence. One night over scotch and some jazz, Ernest and Bart talked about what it would be raising a kid like Elliott, the kind of kid Bart was once.

Hayley bought him all the glitter and colourful clothes, even if that meant some moms blocked her, stopped talking to her and even trash-talked her. Ah, the debates and arguments she got into… But she always stood up to his kid and allegated that she would never ask his son to change who he was just to please people that never treated him well in first place and that if they didn’t like it, they could go fuck themselves.

One day, in lunch, something awesome happened.

Elliott was minding his business with his lunch when a group of girls approached him, giggling and smiling at him.

“Do you girls need something?” He asked.

“Well… we’ve come here to say a few things to you” the girl said “One: I love your style! Like, where did you get that glittery shirt?! It’s amazing!”.

“Also, your nails look ideal! I love the colour! Light blue suits you!”.

“That… and Amelie wants to say something to you” The leader smiled as other girls giggled.

The blonde girl approached him, shy and nervous. She looked at him a few times, trying to find the right words before slamming a kiss on his cheek while thrusting a piece of paper on his chest and returning to her spot. The girls squeaked and squealed in delight as Elliott blushed furiously, catching the letter “I, um, thank you…?”.

“Do you wanna sit with us?” The girls’ probably second-in-command beamed. Elliott smiled widely

“Of course! If the rest is okay with it”.

The girls squealed in delight as they grabbed him and sat him on their spot. Some of the boys scowled and glared at him. But he didn’t care.

He spent most of the lunch talking about fashion and Disney’s newest TV show as the Amelie girl looked at him with something he couldn’t quite place. But he didn’t mind.

At long last, he felt great at school.

That night, during dinner, Elliott decided to ask his parents a question “How do I know I want to kiss someone? Or that I fancy them?”.

His father nearly choked on his wine while a 12-years-old Alaska laughed. His mother chuckled as she looked at her husband in a way of talking. He nodded and she said “Well, when you want to kiss someone, there’s these signals that you must know: if you like them, if you feel safe and wanted, looking at each other’s lips, that small tension between the two of you… the chemistry. Why, my boy? Who is the lucky one who caught your eye?”.

Alaska kept laughing before his father shoot her a look and she focused instead on the food, not without sometimes stare at the scene before her.

“I, uh, the thing is…”.

“Speak up, son. No one’s going to judge you”.

“I have been invited to a sleepover with some kids of my class and I overheard the usual hosts that they will play ‘Spin The Bottle’ and then giggled as they wondered who they will kiss” He flushed pink as Hayley opened her eyes wide before letting go a shocked laugh.

“That’s curious. Luke’s girls will attend to another one of their class, too”.

“Percy told me that these parties end up with two people dating. That’s where he met his first girlfriend”.

Hayley caught her son’s hand and caressed it “Oh, my boy, you grow so fast! You have half of the school at your feet!”.

Elliott flushed as his father shook his hair with an amused smile on his face “Thank you for trusting us with this, my boy. I know how embarrassing this can be”.

“I mean, you’re my Mum and Dad, we’re a family”.

“Don’t tell me he’s getting a phone sooner than me!” Alaska goaded.

His father gave her again the look and she huffed.

In the sleepover

Mrs Kenner was a great host, making four pizzas for the whole group and bonded over many things. He noticed that there were only three boys aside of him. Jackie, Bobby and Jordan. The rest were all girl: six girls, between them Chloe, Veronica, Lizzy, Sandra, Amelie and Nicole.

“Oh my God!” Lizzy gasped “Anthony and Barbara kissed! There’s a video!” Everyone except two of the boys took a peek.

“Barbara? Like, Barbara Harper?” Elliott asked.

“Yes! I’ve Heard your Mum and her dad are long-term friends. Is it true?”.

“I guess. I never ask my Mom about her friends…”.

After some giggling, they went to Nicole’s bedroom, where a bottle and some board games were ready for use.

“Let’s do some quizzes! Maybe on Monday we can surprise Miss Honey with our improved learning skills!”.

At first it was great. Elliott only had one question wrong, which made the leader of the only boys scowl. Veronica called him to sit beside her and the girls giggled. He settled as Nicole announced “It’s official: we’re playing Spin The Bottle!”.

The girls squealed in delight, but Elliott felt mortified. He looked around as he remembered what his father told him of his first kiss, when he was also his age:

“I was so clueless and mortified! I didn’t even move, so the girl made the move and told me that I just had to close my eyes, part my lips and cock my head to the side and I’d be fine. I was a bit clumsy, but it turned out nice. First times are always clumsy and awkward, but with the right guidance and a bit of confidence, it can turn out in a great memory”.

He woke from his entrance as he saw that the bottle was towards him and the girls were looking at him expectantly. He shook his head “Sorry, girls, I wasn’t paying attention. What is happening now?”.

“You have to kiss Nicole” Chloe explained, excited.

“Oh, of course. Um, sure” He got up and coughed awkwardly “Um, let me know when you wanna stop or you’re uncomfortable”.

“Eeee! He’s a gentleman, like his dad” Lizzy squealed.

Nicole took his hand confidently as he gulped the hole on his throat and guided her towards him, parting his lips and closing his eyes. In a brief moment, their lips touched sweetly and gently and it was over as it began. The girls clapped and squealed as the boys nodded in approval.

Nicole smirked at him “Not bad. Maybe it’s true that you’re just as a great kisser as your sister… or father”.

“Please stop talking about my father” He pleaded.

He sat as the game continued as many kissed: Bobby and Lizzie, Amelie and Jack, Veronica and Jordan and Elliott and Chloe. The last one smiled while kissing him and whispered in his ear that his lips felt like pillows with the taste of mint and it was nice to taste. He flushed furiously and nodded.

“One last round, guys, before going to bed!” Nicole announced.

The bottle spun until it landed over Jack and girls giggled. Jack spun the bottle until… it landed towards Elliott. His eyes went wide as the boys looked at each other. Jordan laughed “Are you kidding me?! You’re gonna kiss a boy?”.

“Shut up, Jordan! Boys can kiss boys and girls can kiss girls! Look!” Veronica and Lizzy kissed each other as Jordan huffed. Elliott stood up and offered his hand to Jack, who took it shyly.

“You don’t have to kiss me if you don’t want to—”.

“No, it’s fine. It’s just a kiss. Three seconds and it will be done” Jack proposed.

Jordan was about to say something when Nicole glared at him and he scoffed.

Elliott took a shaky breath as he helplessly looked at Jack’s thin but tempting lips. He noticed that Jack wouldn’t do the move and his heart was hammering on his chest. The words of his mother thundered in his head

“If you truly want to kiss someone, you’ll know and everything will fade for a brief moment”.

He grabbed Jack’s face and kissed him gently, feeling like flying. He felt Jack relax on his touch and kissed him back, focused on the sensation. Kissing Jack was… another whole level. He felt it right, he felt great and smiled in the middle of it before Jordan pulled them away.

“Enough! You said three seconds! It’s been a minute!”.

“Jordan, I—”.

“I don’t want to play this dumb game anymore. Let’s go, boys. Let the fag and the girls do whatever they do”.

“Jack, I’m sorry, I—”.

“It’s alright, no biggie. It was just a kiss” He mouthed “Talk later?” And left.

His shoulders slumped and sighed as he sat on his seat and the girls hugged him.

“Don’t listen to Jordan, he’s a jerk”.

“I don’t know why does he hate me! I have done nothing wrong!”.

Veronica kissed his cheek “Don’t think about him now. Let’s talk about something else!”.

The rest of the night went great, watching a movie and eating sweets as they talked about everything. Elliott felt like he belonged here, with them, in their awesome world. He called to his mom to let her know that he was having an awesome time.

Finally, time to go to bed came and he slept beside the girls while the boys slept in the living room. Some girl giggled as they whispered to each other about who was the best kisser. Pretty sure he heard his name, thing that made him blush. The girls looked at him “D-do you need anything?”.

“Tell me, Elliott, who was the best kisser of any of us?” Veronica asked.

“Yes, tell us!” Amelie beamed.

“I assure you, we won’t get mad. Girl rivalry over men is so 2007!” Nicole declared.

“Well, um… The best kisser for me was—and it doesn’t mean that any of you are bad kissers—for me was… Chloe.”

Chloe giggled and threw him a kiss, but Nicole narrowed her eyes before smirking “Bullshit.”

“Wha—”.

“You kissed all of us because you’re polite like your dad!”.

“Girls, if I have offended you—”.

Amelie placed a hand on his shoulder and took a deep breath “Elliott, it’s alright if you’re gay. We actually feel bad because you had to kiss us to impress us.”

“Besides, homophobia is so 1950s!” Nicole commented.

Veronica smiled “So don’t be silly and go talk to Jack! It’s obvious he likes you too!”.

His eyes lit up “Truly?”.

“Go check yourself. We’ll keep Jordan and his acolytes distracted.” Said Lizzy.

He hugged the girls and went running to the living room to find Jack on the sofa, waiting for him. His heart beat like a hummingbird and sat beside him, giving him enough space. Jack looked at him, his brown eyes and redhead hair looking incredible under the light.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

Uncomfortable silence as they heard whoops and cheering from upstairs. Jack cleared his throat “So…”.

“So”.

“About the kiss, Jack, I—”.

“—Liked it too.” He confessed.

He felt his heart thumping so fast and hard it threatened to spill from his chest as he looked at him “Truly?”.

“Yeah. You’re a good kisser, Elliott.”

“Y-you too, but I need to know… Did it mean something to you?”.

They looked at each other for a brief moment before kissing again, this time awkwardly and passionately before pulling back and giggle.

“So… to be clear… are we boyfriends now?”.

“If you want to…”.

He kissed his cheek “I do.”

5 years later

Elliott was 14 when he broke up with Jack. He was crying, made a pile of glittery mess and his eyeliner was all over his face as he hugged with one arm the pillow and with the other one, his sister Alaska, who was 17.

“Oh, dear, do you want me to retrieve your caramel ice-cream? Watch movies with quesadilla and a pizza as big as our entire bodies?”.

“I WANT MOM!!” He wailed as he cried harder, clutching his pillow “Why did he broke up with me?! What have I done so wrong?!”.

His mobile phone chimed and Alaska took it and she scowled at the text of the jerk that made his little brother cry “That little motherfucker…”.

Elliott, I’m sorry, but this was gonna happen. You’re too… girly for my tastes and everyone wants to bang you and I don’t feel the sparks anymore. Have a good life tho.

Elliott read the message and cried harder as Alaska cursed “I’m gonna kill that motherfucker!!! Where does he live? I’ll kill him!”.

“Alaska, that’s enough. We got this.” Said her father, giving him a severe fatherly look that made Alaska grunt and leave the room and Hayley got in, placing her precious boy on her lap, drawing ghosts on his back and nodded to her husband, who went to calm down their daughter and avoid a murder.

Hayley silenced her mobile, full of threats towards the boy who broke her godson’s heart.

“Oh, baby, my poor baby boy.” She kissed his head, face and forehead as he trembled and shuddered, full of that horrible experience such as teenage heartbreak.

“I…I…I… Don’t know why. Three days ago we were just fine, talking and laughing when I received the text this morning and I… why does it hurt so much?!”.

Hayley cradled him on her arms like she used to do not so long ago, calming down his cries like he were a toddler again and he was scared of the thunderstorms. He hugged her, hard, never letting go and she didn’t complain. She, too had the thought of breaking the jaw of the jerk of Jack –she never liked him—but she understood that he needed comfort and love, not a cycle of violence. She started to sing a lullaby, his favourite when he was a new-born baby and he gripped her even harder. She sang it over and over, never stopping the patrons on his back and telling him how loved he was and how he’d recover from it, that he was also a Parker.

During a year and half, Elliott was destroyed, looking like a wingless angel, never wearing his heels and make-up, making some dumb boys mock him for going ‘straight’ again, especially Jordan. The girls defended him and stood by him and coming over the house to help the family heal the heartbreak, buying him his favourite food and taking him to the therapist and spas, spoiling him until one day, he got out of the bed.

Hayley and Alaska pretended to mind their business, but it was difficult. He started to do a make-up like the TV series Euphoria, flawlessly done and put on a coral pink matte lipstick and added glitter to his face and headed to the painting academy, where everyone clapped and he smiled in a very, very long time.

Some of Alaska’s contacts texted her that Elliott seemed like he was finally over Jack and was interacting with the class and making spectacular drawings and patters, leaving in awe to everyone and even greeting again the girls with a peck on the lips and giving opinions on the girls’ crushes… he was normal again and Alaska ran to her parents to tell them. Ernest gave that very unusual smirk and added “I might have had a man-to-man conversation with him for hours while you girls were at the Carnival and that must be the motive he’s back being his old self.”

Both women showered him in kisses as he laughed, with his awkward laugh and kissed both of his girls before heading to work on some paperwork.

“Elliott, wait!” A voice called from afar. Elliott stopped on his tracks as he sae him. Jack. He sprinted towards him and then said abruptly “I am so sorry for what I did. I wasn’t thinking clearly. I fucked up and I was scared because you were my first boyfriend and I want us to start again. I want to take you back, Elliott. I—I love you!”.

He looked at him shocked before glaring at him, shaking his head “You’re bluffing, right? You really thought that I would never find out, right?”.

“What are you talking about?”.

“That you cheated on me with the whole soccer team and even tried to seduce my sister? That you kissed tons of boys in the bathroom and talked shit about me when no one was looking? You think that I am dumb enough to take you back? Nu-uh, honey, not happening! Go fuck yourself.”

“Elliott, I—”.

“Save your excuses for someone who actually believes in them. Besides, if you really loved me, you would have never cheated on me and would have kept it on your pants!” He snapped his fingers and stroke a diva pose “Besides, cheating on someone and alleygating that you love them is a very lame 1990s boyfriend.”

The girls cheered “You tell him, Elliott!”.

“Drag the cheater!”.

“Cheaters deserve no rights!”.

Jack scowled “Whatever.”

“Buh-bye, bonnie bun!” Elliott mocked as the girls cackled and the boys started to chase him, bullying him for the nickname that his mother called him “God, it’s incredible when you love yourself!”.

[andrustara]

Premier League Fixtures | Sky Sports

Epl schedule tomorrow - EPL Fixtures This Weekend |

If you have the Premier League then your app should be pristine video quality. They have eye money and the resources. NBC Sports gets a little lazy with the video quality because they know that no other tv network in the United States has any plans to buy the rights to click at this page the PL anytime in the near future. Can somebody please teach the idiots at NBC about what full match stats are. This happens quite often.

She never persists and changes the subject or cuts to a commercial epl schedule tomorrow. How lucky are you guys!!! Due to the virus, soccer watchers are at the mercy of network TV. Fun at first but boring.

A second sighting could be most instructive. Also, when the League starts epl schedule tomorrow, why not run the words the fans sing across the bottom of the screen. Is that a good idea. Rex Hearn, 89, Manchester City supporter since 7. Surely after all these years some enterprising fan has collected them in book form to which epl schedule tomorrow may refer. We understand! Rex Hearn. Love that we have epl schedule tomorrow start of a fixture list.

Just wondering about your source? Hi Ian, epl schedule tomorrow clubs and NBC Sports as well as other media outlets wait until tomorros is officially announced before publishing the schedules. Thanks again. It says that it is on Telemundo in the official Premier League app and I am just wanting to make sure that it is true. Sometimes the official Premier League app has informative post wrong listings. Yes, the Peacock games on Sunday will be on Gold as shedule.

Brighton-Newcastle will be on Peacock and Gold also. Replays for tojorrow matches will be available after 9 pm ET. I tried the Gold this year, but never had enough discipline to not look up the scores until 9 pm. I will not sign up for package next season. In total, Peacock Premium will present more than 1, hours of Premier League live match schedul epl schedule tomorrow programming — the most robust offering epl schedule tomorrow available in the U.

Included are full-event replays for all matches on-demand after 9 p. Here in the U. IT makes it very easy to track your wagers, post the odds, track different sportsbooks to select the best odds. Do you know if there is anything like that published in the U. I would love to subscribe to it as it would make wagering on the games less time consuming and more enjoyable.

I would imagine if there is they also might publish for the German, and other Premier level leagues. Thanks for any help you can give me.

Sky Sports picks the games for their television broadcasts, which sometimes require approval from police scheduoe games that are derbies or matches that are considered to be more dangerous requiring additional police protection for fans. The process takes time. I blame all three of them because they have cheated a huge number of Premier soccer fans from a great deal of pleasure.

A pox on all three of these selfish organizations! They took it away, now you have to pay to get it? I think you call epl schedule tomorrow extortion!? At least this Saturday and Sunday I actually will get 3 each day; unless that changes between now epl schedule tomorrow then!!! Can epl schedule tomorrow find a phone number to call Peacock for live help? I mentioned before to very wary of giving them sdhedule credit card information.

EPL Fixtures This Weekend

Rip off artists. So apparently, if epl schedule tomorrow want to watch the reigning EPL champs, you need Peacock at the moment. Maybe in November I can watch Liverpool. Epl schedule tomorrow noticed that!!! A real shame. Like I tell everyone, it was fun while it lasted! Looks like Christopher Harris was right. NBC is screwing over its cable subs a bit more this year. Chris: thanks for the link.

I caution people again to be wary of this vendor. Do you want the shock epl schedule tomorrow being wrongly charged? The hassle of dealing with an organization that hides its phone number?

Whose chat line appears inoperative? Other contact info made difficult to obtain? Even the investigator writing up the case noted difficulty reaching them. Do you have the time and disposition to deal with such problems for such a poor service? Will report outcome. Obviously it looks e;l an error occurred with otmorrow experience. Many companies make it difficult epl schedule tomorrow find their phone number.

I already pay for Peacock Premium but, unlike every other non-HBO service, it is difficult to watch Peacock outside of the home. My friend has an old Roku and a Amazon fire stick, so the app is unavailable. And she is a Comcast customer. But if you are paying for it then it should be available wherever you want to watch it.

But NBC is making it very difficult for me to share my love tomorroww the game with others. A quick update on my Peacock tribulation. Good news. Thanks to Chris H.

The sign up process was clunky, user unfriendly, and I had no confirmation that it epl schedule tomorrow thru. So I tried again but this time more cautiously opting for visit monthly, as my confidence in Peacock ebbed.

Premier League TV schedule and streaming links

Bingo… access to the Prem! I received the monthly charge, but later also got charged for the whole year for the failed sign up. My error was that, in my initial frustration to get activated, I must schesule entered my email incorrectly. So they were also charging me for that service, feeding to nobody or someone lucky! It was epl schedule tomorrow result of a harried fan being careless out of frustration, but why not install a system that would require email validation?

Looks like Peacock Premium subscribers have been screwed over?? How greedy is that? Just using it to force in new Peacock viewers!! I hope they lose the next Premier League contract. I only say this because there are many epl schedule tomorrow cutters that hope this same thing happens — but only so they can actually watch a top level match like this one via schedle stream only service like Peacock. Not as long as providers know that their traditional cable networks still draw a significant revenue stream, yet also can do so via their separate stream-only service.

EPL is most watched euro soccer league in the US and any provider will do what they can to maximize their revenue possibilities. If you epl schedule tomorrow a later model of the Roku devices with their latest software you can screen mirror to epl schedule tomorrow Roku. You then control the start and end of the game from your iPad but the video and sound comes from your TV.

I Have just bought a gen6 IPad and maybe this will do better. tomrorow pay for Peacock Premium on my old pad, how do I get to install epl schedule tomorrow on my new one without having to pay twice? Rebecca You should definitely be able to see an option to just login to Peacock app with your current profile do not sign up again epl schedule tomorrow the new iPad so helpful site to not be epl schedule tomorrow. Rebecca since Peacock allows multiple streams at the epl schedule tomorrow time your old iPad installation will not epl schedule tomorrow you from installing the app epl schedule tomorrow the Apple App store and than being charged again.

Just install the app and provide login credentials like email address and password. As far as your freezing problem is concerned it could be that your WiFi connection to the iPad is not very good. Make sure that your WiFi connection is excellent 5 bars. Other users did complain that Peacock does buffer the stream too many times to their liking.

So distinguish between buffering and freezing, epl schedule tomorrow will show a twirling circle. I always have to make sure not to connect to my Scyedule 5GHz epl schedule tomorrow as somehow that one is not as good as my 2. If I pay for the product I should be able to access the epl schedule tomorrow whenever I want to, how I want to and at a time that best suits me.

LTx In other topics here it was hotly debated what you mentioned. Several factors contributed to the lack of features in the Peacock App. There was no clear strategy how to present to the tomodrow the games as is evident by the dividing the matches between NBC, NBCSN and Peacock and than again a change in strategy by dropping games from the On-Demand Peacock streaming.

It all reeks a bit of an amateurish approach. Liverpool v. Now I am paying for less??? Makes you dizzy trying to figure it out each week. There is an error on the scheduling. On Sunday the 7th you show Wolverhampton v. Leeds and on Monday the 8th you show Leeds v. Crystal Epl schedule tomorrow. As s Leicester City fan I was miffed there was no game scheduled so went to their site and see they are epl schedule tomorrow to play Sunday v.

Otherwise keep up the good work! Man City game on Peacock will have spanish comm by the Telemundo crew epl schedule tomorrow for the first time. Life, for me, is more complicated with Peacock streaming more of the big games. Do the brave thing everyone and cancel Peacock! Then they will blog epl schedule tomorrow implement a scheeule model.

Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Competition: Schedulr League. Saturday, April 10 am EDT. Free Trial. Browse Offers. Rex Hearn January 21, Vasil February 22, Dave L May 13, Jack July 2, Payasos February 23, Chris March 23, Rex Hearn August 7, I love your humor,! Rex Hearn 88, City fan since 7!! Sam May 29, Bruce Duffy February 17, I totally agree with Rex. FIX IT!!!! Echedule Eaker March 8, Tom March 15, Christopher Harris March 15, Mike August 12, Is there epl schedule tomorrow venue that allows for subscription?

Thank You. Mike Borelli. Christopher Harris August 13, Doc March 25, Azer March 26, JP March 26, Doc March 28, Burnley 0 0 West Ham United. Chelsea 0 0 Fulham. Crystal Palace 0 0 Manchester City. Everton 0 0 Aston Villa.

Manchester United 0 0 Liverpool. Newcastle United 0 0 Arsenal. Southampton 0 0 Epl schedule tomorrow City. Tottenham Hotspur 0 0 Sheffield United. West Bromwich Albion 0 0 Wolverhampton Wanderers. Arsenal 0 0 West Bromwich Albion. Aston Villa 0 0 Manchester United. Fulham 0 0 Burnley. Leeds United 0 0 Tottenham Hotspur. Leicester City 0 0 Newcastle United. Liverpool 0 0 Southampton. Manchester City 0 0 Chelsea.

Sheffield United 0 0 Crystal Palace. West Ham United 0 0 Everton. Wolverhampton Wanderers 0 0 Brighton and Hove Albion. Burnley 0 0 Leeds United. Everton 0 0 Sheffield United. Crystal Palace 0 0 Aston Villa. Manchester United 0 0 Tomorrod City. West Bromwich Albion 0 0 Liverpool. Chelsea 0 0 Arsenal. Newcastle United 0 0 Manchester City. Southampton 0 0 Fulham. Tottenham Hotspur 0 0 Wolverhampton Wanderers.

Brighton and Hove Albion 0 0 Manchester City. Burnley 0 0 Liverpool. Epk 0 0 Leicester City. Crystal Palace 0 0 Arsenal. Everton 0 0 Wolverhampton Liverpool full match highlights этом. Manchester United 0 0 Fulham. Newcastle United 0 0 Sheffield United. Southampton 0 0 Leeds United. Tottenham Hotspur 0 0 Aston Villa.

[awkward-whiteboy]

1-200

200 Questions to Ask Me!

200: My crush’s name is:  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 199: I was born in: Michigan198: I am really: Depressed, bored, hungry, lonely197: My cellphone company is: Verizon196: My eye color is: Brown/ugly195: My shoe size is: 11194: My ring size is:8.5193: My height is: 6″3192: I am allergic to: Medicine, tree dust191: My 1st car was: The piece of shitmobile190: My 1st job was: Illegal  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 189: Last book you read: How to Think About Weird Things Critical Thinking for a New Age. (Yes it’s a college textbook, but if you love debating with people on the internet [ though this is pointless] this book is a must read).188: My bed is: a college loft that I fear is going to fall any second. 187: My pet: Pet no, mascot my HARAMBE FLAG! 186: My best friend: @rinkatai @aesthetichalestorm @bookerdewiit 185: My favorite shampoo is: Whatever I have in the shower when I’m showering184: Xbox or ps3: either, but Mario Kart trumps them all183: Piggy banks are: cool if they aren’t the break ones182: In my pockets: wallet, room keys, a “Thanks asshole” note someone graciously wrote me 181: On my calendar: Peoples birthdays, and predictions for stupids shit. (5 for 6 on them being right)180: Marriage is: dumb, combining debt together over a stupid ceremony. Why not just say fuck it and save the money for a sweet house and lots of animals179: Spongebob can: keep coming out. I love that show. If given the time, I could probably quote almost all the episodes178: My mom: is my mom177: The last three songs I bought were? People buy songs? I can name albums: Reaching into infinity, Begining of the End, One More Light176: Last YouTube video watched: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsx0d3p4SMQ

175: How many cousins do you have? That I talk to, 3,4. total like 22+

174: Do you have any siblings? Youngest of 5

173: Are your parents divorced? No

172: Are you taller than your mom? Yes

171: Do you play an instrument? Guitar and Trombone

170: What did you do yesterday? Stayed up til 5 am playing Garrys Mod

[ I Believe In ]

169: Love at first sight: Sort of, doesnt work out though

168: Luck: Luck is an undeclared claim.

167: Fate: Nope

166: Yourself: Never. I always fail

165: Aliens: Hard to say, 

164: Heaven: No

163: Hell: I am a living hell

162: God: not a god, but a something

161: Horoscopes: Nope

160: Soul mates: Yes

159: Ghosts: No

158: Gay Marriage: Marriage is Marriage, IMO calling it Gay marriage is trying to make it different than regular marriage.

157: War: Yes

156: Orbs: YEs

155: Magic: No

[ This or That ]

154: Hugs or Kisses: Hugs

153: Drunk or High: Both.  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

152: Phone or Online: Phone

151: Red heads or Black haired: Red Heads, but thats just from my experience

150: Blondes or Brunettes: Brunettes

149: Hot or cold: Mild

148: Summer or winter: Winter

147: Autumn or Spring: Spring

146: Chocolate or vanilla: Vanilla

145: Night or Day: Night

144: Oranges or Apples: Apple

143: Curly or Straight hair: Curly

142: McDonalds or Burger King: BK

141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: White Chocolate

140: Mac or PC: PC

139: Flip flops or high heals: Flippers

138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: Sweet and Poor

137: Coke or Pepsi: Don’t care, just gots to be diet

136: Hillary or Obama: Norm is my OTP  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

135: Burried or cremated: Cremated, that way I’ll still be around people when im dead because no one would come willing if I was buried

134: Singing or Dancing: My singing is 1 of a kind

133: Coach or Chanel: Chanel because meme

132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: Kat McPhee, only because I don’t know any of them and Hick is a bad name with my life.

131: Small town or Big city: Both

130: Wal-Mart or Target: Target

129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Ben Stiller

128: Manicure or Pedicure: Pedi

127: East Coast or West Coast: Weast Coast  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

126: Your Birthday or Christmas: Birthday, people notice me :)

125: Chocolate or Flowers: Flowers

124: Disney or Six Flags: Datknee… Disney

123: Yankees or Red Sox: Neither

[ Here’s What I Think About ]

122: War: Pointless, but happens, Realistically, will never end.

121: George Bush: All politics have goods and bads, we’ve had better, but we also had far worse.

120: Gay Marriage: Always said

119: The presidential election: Popular vote and the current way are both fraud by the way America is. A completely new system is needed.

118: Abortion: Not a women so my opinion is not valid or needed. Honestly I hate kids. so Pro

117: MySpace: Last i checked (like a year ago,) its pretty much a Soundcloud.

116: Reality TV: Stupid

115: Parents: Do what they do. Different generation so their ways of parenting are theirs.

114: Back stabbers: Too many in my life… DAMN… MAYBE THIS IS WHY I AM FUCKED UP.

113: Ebay: I spend too much money on it

112: Facebook: Fuck the Zuck

111: Work: Never had a legal job

110: My Neighbors: Can go shove a knife up their asses 

109: Gas Prices: Better than the past

108: Designer Clothes: I’m making a separate post about this.. I might be in a bit of trouble with my college over this.

107: College: I don’t fit in anywhere. only friends I have I went to High school with. 

106: Sports: Really wish I played football in High school. I know I wouldn’t play at my school, but a smaller one I would.

105: My family: Family is family

104: The future: WIll not be brighter. 

[ Last time I ]

103: Hugged someone: Too long ago

102: Last time you ate: yesterday (2:00pm 12/13/2017)

101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: Emotional abuser has a drug dealer that lives in my colleges town. Saw her :/ cried for hours.

100: Cried in front of someone: Summer 2017

99: Went to a movie theater: whenever IT came out. Got in trouble with my colelge cause of roommates

98: Took a vacation: too long ago

97: Swam in a pool: summer 2017

96: Changed a diaper: never

95: Got my nails done: never

94: Went to a wedding: Spring 2017

93: Broke a bone: with a doctor knowing never, but like 6 years ago

92: Got a piercing: None

91: Broke the law:  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

90: Texted: I stubbed my nose on the elevator

[ MISC ]

89: Who makes you laugh the most: Doc

88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: Nothing

87: The last movie I saw: Cure For Wellness

86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: Going home so I wont be alone with my depressing thoughts and questionable music

85: The thing im not looking forward to: going to the meeting

84: People call me: Davie Crocket Davy Divad Garbage, fucker loser, pretty much every name in the book

83: The most difficult thing to do is: pretend to be normal

82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: Talked the cop out of it with my mindfucking bullshittery

81: My zodiac sign is: Scorpio

80: The first person i talked to today was:

@rinkatai

79: First time you had a crush: 9th Grade

78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: Rink

77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: Last week

76: Right now I am talking to: Myself 

75: What are you going to do when you grow up: Good question  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)  

74: I have/will get a job: No, I cant do interviews I alwasy fuck them up or never get called back

73: Tomorrow: hopefully do something better

72: Today: Watched 9 hours of netflixs

71: Next Summer: Too far to determain

70: Next Weekend: Too far to determain

69: I have these pets: None

68: The worst sound in the world: College kids screaming because finals when they are just being cliche

67: The person that makes me cry the most is: myself

66: People that make you happy: Happy? whats that

65: Last time I cried: Today

64: My friends are: Rin Doc 

63: My computer is: Fucked up because everything I own always gets fucked up

62: My School: College sucks, High School : IN A LOT OF HOT WATER

61: My Car: is a piece of shit

60: I lose all respect for people who: treat me bad… damn thats like 95% of the people I see

59: The movie I cried at was: The Producer

58: Your hair color is: Ugly Brown

57: TV shows you watch: The OFfice

56: Favorite web site: Higher or Lower Youtube

55: Your dream vacation: Somewhere with the right person

54: The worst pain I was ever in was: The emotion and things I live with everyday.

53: How do you like your steak cooked: However it is cooked

52: My room is: MY STUFF IS CLEAN roommate 1 is not

51: My favorite celebrity is: Too many to name

50: Where would you like to be: A better state of mind

49: Do you want children: NO

48: Ever been in love: Sadly

47: Who’s your best friend: Rin Doc

46: More guy friends or girl friends: Girl Friends

45: One thing that makes you feel great is: Dark humor

44: One person that you wish you could see right now: :’(

43: Do you have a 5 year plan: I only plan 5 minutes in advance

42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: No, honestly asking 10th grade me, i only planned up till graduation

41: Have you pre-named your children: NO KIDS

40: Last person I got mad at:  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

39: I would like to move to: Sanity land

38: I wish I was a professional: Musician

[ My Favorites ]

37: Candy: Sour Skittles or Mega Sours

36: Vehicle: Piece of Shit Mobile

35: President: Suliman with the Onion hat

34: State visited: Iowa. 

33: Cellphone provider: Verizon

32: Athlete: Cardale Jones

31: Actor: Bill Mother Fucking Murry

30: Actress: Emma Watson

29: Singer: Davey Jones, Davey Havok, Chester, and many more

28: Band: Too many, but I will say I’ve personally met one of them

27: Clothing store: cheap ones

26: Grocery store: cheap ones

25: TV show: Office, Simpsons South Park TWD

24: Movie: Cure For Wellness Clockwork Orange, Cant remember the name, but the original hunger games… the japanese one

23: Website: youtube

22: Animal: panda pugs

21: Theme park: cedar point

20: Holiday: leif erikson day

19: Sport to watch: hockey

18: Sport to play: football

17: Magazine:  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

16: Book: Too many

15: Day of the week: Monday. Because I play a game of what sucks more… I win a lot

14: Beach: na

13: Concert attended: Alice Cooper 3x, Deep Purple, Stone Sour, Skillet, Motley Crue 2x, FFDP, Wayland, Valraven, Alterbridge, Iron Maiden, going to see Judas Priest with someone in April

12: Thing to cook: Pasta and muffins

11: Food: ^

10: Restaurant: places with spicy chicken nuggets rice pudding and chicken noodle soup

9: Radio station: 101 WRIF Q106

8: Yankee candle scent: N/A

7: Perfume: N/A

6: Flower: Idk Roses or Marigolds

5: Color: Black orange green

4: Talk show host:  ( ͡°( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ʖ ͡°) ͡°)

3: Comedian: A lot

2: Dog breed: PUG

1: did you answer all these truthfully? Like 4 are not :/

[lxvxjxnkie]

Facing up

In January I broke up with the guy I was seeing, because it was going to take a ton of energy to bring him up to speed on my emotional history, and it was energy I needed for dealing with that history.

It was a seven month wait to see a psychologist who had the skillset I needed. I knew I was in trouble by June last year.  A couple of things stand out: there’s an aboutness to my experience of depression; I can trace it back to a trigger event, and there’s often a specific theme to my ruminations. Secondly, it doesn’t respond to medication. My mood, confidence, day-to-day experience of life is improved on medication, but I’m still stuck, avoiding a major decision and not getting any writing done.

I’ve seen a psychiatrist who said I’m not bipolar.

Finally, about four weeks ago, I had my first appointment with the psychologist. It went well, but we barely scratched the surface. He said, straight up, that he thinks there’s complex trauma playing out.

I knew that already. I have always avoided writing that I have primary trauma. I’ve talked about intergenerational trauma, paying deference to my primary parent’s experience of domestic violence in her childhood.

But now it’s time to face up to the primary trauma: a two year period, from year eleven at high school to first year at uni.

My brother left home after about three months of screaming.

My mum visited the daughter she gave up for adoption, about three years after they’d had a reunion, and the daughter had more or less blanked her. Mum came home and spent about a week catatonic with grief, and required a massive amount of emotional support after she finally started talking again.

I came out and that didn’t go well.

Growing up I was lucky to have a dad who paid child support, but every few years the agreement would be reviewed, and mum would come home from court spitting venomous rage about how he’d screwed her in court. When I turned 18, the agreement was up for renewal (it’s payable until 21), but I was now legally an adult and the case was brought in my name. Dad had offered to reach an informal agreement but Mum called me a fool for considering it and made me sue him. So in the middle of year twelve I was suing my father for child support. On our day in court, it turned out to be a negotiation process, not a contested hearing and not an opportunity for a court to hear and adjudicate all mum’s grievances. So she unloaded those on the Legal Aid lawyer, and when I asked her to stop that, she turned her rage on me. To this day, I still break into a cold sweat in small rooms with meeting tables.

After that, it was weeks and weeks of cold, silent, grit-toothed rage. In the end I decided to move out and started looking for places, and -that- got through to mum; she said to wait until I’d finished year twelve, and the cold thawed a little.

I did something stupid, deleting a file I’d created to layout a newsletter for Women and the Australian Church. Not sure how many kids in year 11-12 were laying out 4-5 editions per year of a 12-16 page newsletter for their mum’s church group. More of the cold silent treatment lasting for weeks.

I was also debating for my school and the state team, moot courting, public speaking, and editing the school newspaper. I honestly don’t know how I got through that year. I remember my teachers being pretty concerned for me, but I absolutely couldn’t talk to them about it; at the tiniest gesture of sympathy, I felt like I would start crying and never stop — just not done in an all-boys’ school. At the end of the year I had one conversation with the guidance counsellor, who faked a bunch of absence notes in my diary, because I’d missed too many days to graduate, otherwise. Then I graduated as Dux of the School, won a Premier’s Prize for English, school prizes for Literature and Debating, and an Australian Psychological Society Prize. Straight As and perfect marks in three subjects.

And I’ve written before about how it all fell apart in undergrad at Unimelb. More than any other university, Unimelb frames pastoral care for students as a service. Even if you’re failing all your subjects, nobody there will ever e-mail to ask ‘are you alright?’ You are required to model good help-seeking behaviour, framing yourself as a responsible service user, before you’ll get help. I didn’t even know there was anything wrong; I knew I was very, very unhappy, but I understood it as moral failure and laziness, and I really resented needing to identify as sick to get help. And still do. And if you have social anxiety, and you’re paralysed, well, good luck managing to ask for help. I enrolled there in 2000 and it was not until 2008 that I was dating someone and he said, you’re acting weird, what the fuck is going on? And he pushed and pushed until finally I said, ‘mum won’t stop calling me.’

My uncle Peter had died. I’d asked her to leave me out of the inevitable court battle over his estate. But one day I visited her and she was incredibly distressed over her other brother taking money out of the estate that should have been equally divided. So I wrote a letter laying out the legal duties of executors and threatening action for her to send in her name. But she forwarded it to him saying ‘this is what I would send you if I was really nasty.’ And it turned out that he was reimbursing the money he’d paid upfront to the lawyers, having mortgaged his house, to defend the estate against my uncle’s ex-partner. ‘What difference does that make?’ said mum. I was so angry with myself for letting myself get suckered into that game: mum presenting herself as the victim to get someone else to step in as rescuer. And seeing myself the way mum saw me — like the pitbull you let off the leash to intimidate someone — I felt stupid, and used, and ashamed. I didn’t talk to mum for a year, but she kept calling my phone, and until my partner picked up on it, I had no idea how much that ‘jack-hammering’ was winding me up.

All through my teenage years and once I’d moved out of home, it was normal to go to bed and have a flashback. I have an incredibly detailed memory and the flashbacks were vivid; they would leave me frozen and sweaty and exhausted. One every night before sleep, sometimes more. I would have them as well in lecture theatres, when something in the lecture cued the memory of a family experience.

Back to the present moment: late last year, I got that e-mail from my mum, ‘correspondence must cease’. But coming up to my birthday on Monday, I knew that she would get in contact. It’s just the most characteristic thing for her to feel like she’s got the upper hand so everything in the relationship is fine. There are people she has grievously wronged and she is still surprised and hurt when they don’t accept her overtures of ‘forgiveness’. Sure enough, 10AM, there’s the e-mail, happy birthday, thinking of you, love mum. And I smacked it back over the net so hard. I reiterated the line I’ve been saying, over and over: I am not trying to relitigate the past, but I am going to tell the story of it, and you need to acknowledge that your experience does not determine the truth and validity of my story and my relationships.

The hardest thing post-trauma is to tell a coherent story of self-survival, and anyone who deliberately tries to disrupt that process is morally akin to the Catholic lawyers demanding time and date specificity of people abused as children.

I knew when I wrote that post in August 2015 to expect a call; I stopped in at a supermarket to pick up a bag of glucose in preparation. Sure enough, it came, and it was the usual arctic blast of self-righteousness and the purpose of the call was fact-checking. ‘That’s not how I experienced that.’ No shit; you have every self-serving reason to remember it differently, because you were not the one getting hurt by it.

It was my birthday on Monday. I hid the date on FB and only my step-mother remembered it. I hid the date because I knew this e-mail was coming and I knew it would dig up a ton of baggage that I would have to deal with, and I knew that I was going to really struggle to field and enjoy and respond to birthday greetings. So I had a day of self-care instead, after replying to the e-mail. And when I went to bed that night, I woke up around 3AM straight into an intrusive episode, a flashback to that tiny room in the Mag Ct, reliving it for about 45 minutes until I was finally able to get up, stagger down the hall to the kitchen and get some water.

I haven’t done that for years. I had forgotten how exhausting it is; afterwards, even though I eventually got back to sleep, I woke up feeling like I’d run a marathon overnight. And that nauseous feeling in my gut, the interferon-y feeling in my muscles, the lactic acid build-up in my diaphragm. The tightness of breath all day until my boss suggested we go walk up a mountain and that unlocked me. Today, the day after — it feels like weeks later — I’m still tired. The next appointment is on Tuesday, so that will be a chance to debrief, but it’ll no doubt dig up new stuff to process. I need to make a decision really soon about whether to continue with my PhD or put it on hold while I deal with this stuff.

[scarletpan-moved]

All adorable asks ✌🏻❤

Okay xD Thank you! 

Ask meme here -- Answers under the cut.

1. Have you met your soul mate?

I’m quite certain I have, yes

2. Favorite color when you were younger, and now?

Its changed over time. Super young me, I think it was pink and yellow, but that was what dad wanted me to like so perhaps that’s why? I hit upper elementary school and it shifted to pink-purple shades. In middle school and early high school it was black (hello edge lord) and now? Light pastel blues and lavenders ❤

3. Do you wear eye-shadow? What color?

Typically? No. When I do its usually just browns. Sometimes I’ll get creative, I’ve done rainbow, reds and blacks, but I prefer no eye-shadow. 

4. Are you in love right now?

Oh fuck yeah

5. In your opinion, is love at first sight real?

I think infatuation at first sight is real. Love develops when you get to know someone, their desires, passions, tics, likes and dislikes... Can infatuation at first sight turn into love? Yeah, of course. I’ve had it happen. But love at first sight? That intense burning passion that never leaves? No. 

6. Are you an optimist, realist, opportunist, or pessimist?

More of a realist I think, but I know I have both optimistic and pessimistic moments. 

7. First kiss details? (If you haven’t been kissed, reply how and if you would like to be.)

We were at play try outs. We had already gone, and were chilling behind a column in the cafeteria. I was leaning against it, he was in front of me. We were chatting, doing our thing. I always wore Rocket Dogs or Converse, so I was sliding a bit on the tile, but no big, yeah? 

Well, apparently me sliding made the perfect opportunity. He waited until I had slid down enough that he could actually reach my face, and then he kissed me. And promptly ran off afterwards, but hey he was a nerd so I wasn’t expecting a ‘moment’.

8. Do you own stickers, an stationary?

So. Many. Stickers. I don’t have official stationary, but I want it. I have a billion pens, three planners, stickers... I love this shit.

9. What’s your aesthetic?

Coffee, pastel purples, notebooks with notes written in nice handwriting. You know the tumblr-esque desk, with notebooks that are neat and have cute pastel pen in them accenting the black, with a cup of coffee and fairy lights? Add a cat in the desk chair and that’s me. 

10. Do you wear dresses, and skirts?

Sometimes? Not often, but if I could find dresses or skirts for my body type I may wear them more often. 

11. What is your hair like?

Short in the back and on the sides, longer on top with bangs. I typically part on the left with my bangs on the right. My hair is then and soft (when I get regular hair cuts), but gets greasy easily. 

12. Does time go by fast or slow to you?

It depends, really. If I’m waiting on it to go by, slow. But normally? Father fast. There’s never enough hours in the day. 

13. What time do you go to bed? What time do you wake up?

On Mondays and Wednesdays I go to bed around 12. On Tuesdays I go to bed closer to 1:30. On Thursdays and weekends I go to bed past midnight, typically closer to 3 (except Sundays which is typically earlier). 

I wake up at 7 on Mondays and Wednesdays, 5 on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and whenever the fuck I want (typically around noon) on weekends.

14. Favorite sweet food?

I really like icing, vanilla icing. Also those soft cookies that everyone hates? Those. But my very favorite has to be Robins Eggs, they’re a malted milk ball-esque Easter candy

15. Tea, coffee, or hot cocoa?

Coffee

16. Space, Ocean, City, or Forest?

For what? I dunno, Forest but near a city?? 

17. Favorite game as a child?

Video game? Pokemon Stadium or Tanks (idk the actual name of it sue me) Bored game? Life. Game to play with kids? Hide and go seek

18. Comfort book?

Artemis Fowl, typically the first one.

19. Princess, Fairy, Mermaid, or Unicorn?

Fairy. I’ve always preferred Fairies to anything else.

20. Do you fall in love easily?

I become interested, infatuated, easily. I’ll feel a lust for someone, an emotional closeness to someone, an interest in someone. Do I feel love towards someone easily? No.

21. Favorite word?

Discombobulated!!

22. Describe your life in 3 words.

Stressful, roller-coaster, colorful

23. Do you dance? Slow dance?

I don’t. I’d like to, but I haven’t before.

24. Do you wear fake nails, or paint your nails?

I’d like to, but my hands shake too much to do my own nails, and getting them done costs a lot. 

25. Has anyone ever confessed to you?

Confessed what? Love? Yes. I’m a listening ear who hears many things.

26. Do you lie?

I try not to. I’ve told white lies many times though. “Yes I’m too busy to skype”, “No I don’t like ___”, “Haha that tag’s not about you”, “No I’m not angry.”

My white lies are typically both to save face, and to prevent someone else’s feelings from being hurt.

27. What makes you smile?

Cute animals, funny YouTubers, my friends and partners, people being happy when I get them things. 

28. Have you ever cried in a book or movie?

Oh yes. Dude, have you ready Harry Potter? I know you have, Mikki. And I know you cried. 

29. When and who was your first crush?

First crush?? Shit.. Jacob Wyche, my first elementary school (grades K-2). 

30. Marriage or kids?

I’d love both. Not too many kids, and I’m debating on adoption being birth is a bit... frightening. 

31. Are you superstitious?

Somewhat, but not about the normal stuff. More about urban legends, the planet alignment... odd things I guess. 

32. Who’s your 3 am thought?

@little-mx-rayne

33. Do you like candy? What’s your favorite candy?

Oh hell yesMalted Milk Balls (Robins Eggs preferably), Candy Corn, Ferrero Rocher (fuck allergies eat candy), the mini M&Ms... I like candy.

34. Favorite holiday?

HALLO-FUCKING-WEEN

35. Favorite season?

Fall. It would probably be winter if we got snow here, but fall. 

36. Cat or dog person?

I adore both for different reasons. A well trained dog is probably my preference, but I don’t think I could really pick. 

37. Are you quiet or loud?

Quiet unless excited, I think

38. Favorite time period? (80′s, 60′s, etc.)

I like the aesthetic of the 50s, but that’s about it there

39. Favorite fashion fad that went away?

Hm... Fringe bangs? Billion-bracelets? Oh I know! Studded belts! 

40. The best dream/ worst nightmare you’ve ever had?

I don’t remember most of my dreams, and I don’t talk about my nightmares, so no

41. Worst fear as a kid?

Thunder and abandonment. 

44. Do you flirt?

Do I try? Yes. Do I succeed? No.

45. What’s your style?

“I’m poor and can’t afford my style” style But tbh I’d really like to have ‘kawaii goth’ type clothes, but I have neither the funds nor body for that. 

46. Do you blush?

Yes. So much. My face is like a glowing beacon. 

47. Do you feel everything, nothing, or you don’t know what to feel?

Between everything and nothing. I feel too much, but at times there’s this odd numbness. Like I know I should smile, but I have to force it. But also there’s time where a little thing happens and its devastating. So idk. 

48. Are you a crier? Do you smile?

I’m a major cry baby. I tear up at the littlest of thing. I don’t smile as much as I should, but that’s shifted some. I’m a bit self conscious about my smile though. 

49. First love?

First love? Yeah not gettin’ a name here

50. Last love?

@lukeriolc and @little-mx-rayne

[rice1]

They also frequent mineral springs and licks within their range

D T, of Sussex. The instruction booklet you sent me, written entirely in Japanese, does not, as you surmise, contain the rules of any Nintendo game. It turns out to be the instruction booklet for a large washing machine of a type that has not been manufactured since 1987.

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[ladyofmind]

I joined Patreon...

Patreon page

I have been mentioning for a while what a busy little birdy I’ve been, without exactly telling you what I’ve been up to... All that will be coming out over the next few weeks!

The first step is Patreon.

I’ve been considering this for a little while, debating between being my usual quiet self, maybe asking for a Ko-fi thing, or Patreon.

In the end, as much as I thought it would be rude to ask for support, I realized there is also plenty to offer... Fandoms start with less. And most don’t exactly offer you a chance to be written into it for a story unless you write it yourself.

Where else can you Role Play with the actual characters? 

It’s more about access for you, my readers, than it is about anything else. As a writer, you go into this calling knowing that it’s your job to foot the bill... no matter how you handle it. I am prepared to do that 100%. But why not, before I have everything finished and marketed by others, start by including you readers? You are the ones who fall in love, or at least laugh at, my characters long before anyone else knows about them. You can start the fandom before anyone else, join and make a community for all... I would say exclusive, but we do want all types of fans don’t we? That is the dream at least. You will just be able to say you knew about it first, and maybe have more backstory over the people reading once the Red Letters series is out into the published world.

Knowledge is good, is power right?

So without further prodding, here’s an idea of my levels:

What to expect from my Patreon…

Freebies- If you watch me here, without yet donating, you will find a blog post a day early. My monthly game wrap up is just another way to see what I'm into as a writer. Hopefully it helps you get to know me and what I am up to, before you decide to support me for further content.

Tiers:

$1- This is your tip jar level. You like my work, and would like behind the scenes snippets of my writing. That's notes and random musings, comments on editing, general one-sided content from the mind of this writer. Anything I schedule to blog post will also be posted here first. Generally that's Music Monday posts and some other extras.

$6- This is that level where we can interact! Want to ask questions? Want to just hang out and chat? We can figure out where to do this, as I have a Discord, a Telegram, a Gmail etc to work with. You tell me the media plus a day of the week, and that will be the day we chat or catch up (per previously decided conversation.) I am far more active on Twitter and Instagram messaging over some of the others as I don't always get the notifications timely, hence the "picking a day" part. I do not want to forget to answer you, nor do I want you to feel ignored because I missed the memo.

If given to me, I can promote your accounts (Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr- currently not on Facebook to shout out there) once a month in a #FollowFriday fashion for supporting me.

$12- A personalized Role Play in my Red Letters bar/nightclub world with your own character! 2-3 pages max, with certain rules about God Modding the character you request. Also hope I don't have to mention no R rated content in this RP.

The best part for repeating supporters of this tier is that we can continue on from the month before, or start a new story! And if your character is someone that catches my attention, this story may just be posted on the blog! So further recognition there too. 

$25- This is a self growth one. You are not only investing in my creative endeavors, but in me as well. Anxiety makes it super hard to talk to people, to not be shy. This tier means I will provide you audio or some visual (video) content of my life and writing related passions. This will evolve as we get to know each other, but the idea is that I will eventually be as comfortable sharing in front of a camera or on a microphone as most other people are. Also super helpful for future book signings and other confidence required events. Have to dream big right? Plus there will be a thank you picture on my accounts, pinned monthly, along with the shout out every Friday on Twitter. Also posted on Instagram and my blog.

[thisgeekyteacher]

June… has been a month! The end of this stint in Korea has raced up before I had time to blink and July is shaping up to be a mess and a half, but for now, here’s a wee overview of June!

HEADLINE OF THE MONTH

What’s even happened this month…  Seriously though, June has been a month where I have not been diligently jotting down headlines. Sometimes it’s too hard to keep up with what Trump is doing, and his utterly heinous border policies have, quite rightly, dominated the news.

To lighten the mood, my pick this month is the day I became a football fan!

*disclaimer* I am not a football fan, I just like seeing Korea  doing half decently. Football is not their sport!

  FOOD / DRINK

  There hasn’t been any improvement in this department. With so much to do, I’ve sort of… crumpled. My cooking and baking has taken a massive hit. Not too good really. the frustrations of a tiny kitchen!

  READING & WRITING

Reading has taken a hit this month also. I’m currently in the throes of re-reading The Hunger Games for easy read factor, and trying to forge on with Smoke in the Sun – which I’m really enjoying, little of it that I’ve read!

I’m keen to get the majority of my packing done so I can get a move along with Smoke in the Sun and get started on Christina Henry’s new one: The Mermaid.

          SCHOOL

Whilst the reading and the cooking have suffered somewhat, the school productivity, and the blog, is slowly getting back to normal – I mean, it would all be doing that if that I wasn’t on the cusp of moving countries (have I mentioned how much I hate moving…)

This month I have created worksheets, resources and I had my open class!

        Open Class 2018 | Phonics: Basic Blends

The Spelling Test 2.0

  TV / FILM

Due to the packing, which is such a time drain, I’ve been putting on background TV that I’ve seen before. I’ve been back on the Star Trek train, with Voyager taking centre stage!

  ACTIVITY

The highlight of this month was, without doubt, the United Cube – ONE concert!

Featuring Cube artists BTOB, Hyuna, Pentagon (& Triple H), CLC, Yu Seonho, Jo Kwon and (G)I-DLE, it was more than four hours of magic, madness and cracking music. I’m very thankful I managed to score a ticket for this concert!

  CRAFT

The crafting has gone well this week, resulting in physical purchases avaliable in the etsy store, and a cracking Polaroid craft that you can use as a school activity for a range of subjects, or for your own personal enjoyment!

        Gratitude Stickers

Ice Cream Bunting | DIY Polaroids

  MUSIC

June has been quite the month for music releases, but a fair few old favourites have wormed their way back to the fore-front.

Panic! at the Disco remains up there at the top, with full album release. As I’ve come to expect from them, every track is a winner. I’ve had the album on loop since it dropped. Not bored yet!

Florence + The Machine is a late addition this month, with Lungs finding it’s way back onto the recently played playlist. Lungs will forever be my favourite, especially Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up). I have been listening the new outing, High as Hope, but the jury is, as yet, still out.

Another return to the list is Jung Ilhoon’s She’s Gone. He actually performed this at the United Cube concert – I never thought I’d see this performed live, so that made the concert. I’m pretty sure this song just get’s better, and live it’s incredible.

I can hardly go without mentioning Beyoncé… that would just be rude. She pulled another fast one, dropping the collaboration album Everything is Love, under the name The Carters. What’s not to love!

Park Kyung graced us with a new single this month, yet another display of his versatility as an artist. Instant (feat. Sumin) is a mellow smooth jazz track that you can’t help but groove too!

BTOB made a comeback this month, and This Is Us give us summer bops for days, I can’t decide which is my favourite between The Feeling and Only One For Me! This one is so good it’s here and in the Mixtape Monday|4 post, along with a bucket load of other music I’ve been loving recently!

      FASHION & BEAUTY

The biggest news this month, is that my hair is once again darker! I’ve been a red-head for years, tried something different around Christmas, and then went back to red again, but it wasn’t working for me the way it used to, so the dark brown is back, and I am loving it! The improvement in mood and the full on arrival of summer has also probably played it’s part!

In beauty news, after weeks of debat, I took the plunge for the Red Velvet endorsed Etude House lipstick set. I have not been disappointed. Reds or nudes are my main go-to’s in lip colours these days, and these have been a great addition – a lovely formula, great staying power and lovely colour range.

  MISC.

Not much new or extraordinary this month, but here are three drawings I’m particularly proud of. I do all my drawings by hand and then scan them in with an app. Perhaps one day I’ll invest in an iPad, but even then, I’m pretty sure I’ll carry on drawing by hand. It’s just so satisfying!

        And finally, a find that is complete news to me, is Bundaberg Grapefruit. I was then informed that there are now a good 12 flavours available. I’m a purist, and the Ginger Beer will always be the best. Fact!

  How was your June? Have you been gearing up for the holidays?

Hopefully, the majority of the packing will be done, dusted and on it’s way by the end of this week, so the rest of July can be filled with interesting things… maybe!

Best of… |June 2018 June... has been a month! The end of this stint in Korea has raced up before I had time to blink and July is shaping up to be a mess and a half, but for now, here's a wee overview of June!

[bombshellinfo]

Real life Tips for a Better Work-Life Balance

It's so secret—managing all the things you have to do as an adult is a challenge. From doing your best on the job to taking care of yourself (and, if you have them, your kids) to trying to see friends and stay sane, we know you've got a lot on your plate.And while it's up for debate whether you can "have it all," you certainly ought to be able to balance everything you've got and live a happy, fulfilling life. To help you out in that pursuit, we've gathered some of the best advice out there on maintaining a healthy work-life balance. Read the tips below, and start implementing some of them today.

Managing Your Time

1. The most game-changing advice I’ve gotten is this: If you’re truly going to act on your priorities, you need to dedicate time to them. So, I took a weekly calendar and some crayons, and mapped out my priorities to create a “typical” week, with time dedicated to each of my priorities: exercise, work, family time, and so forth. I started with the “big rocks:” the most important and least flexible responsibilities (I learned this trick from Stephen Covey). For me, these were work and my children’s sports schedules. Then, I decided when I get my best work done. For example, I knew that my job required time for “deep-thinking” work, so I dedicated one day per week to be meeting-free. Alix Hughes2. One of the biggest struggles is fitting it all in to 24 hours. Waking up at 4 AM gives me extra hours in the day, and this quiet time allows me to complete projects before the house wakes up. Hannah Morgan3. To make time for hobbies, passions, and relationships outside of work, I've made sure to have a short version of what I'd ideally love to do for busy weeks. I'd rather have a nice long dinner with a friend if I can, but during a busy week, catching a 45-minute coffee during the day is better than not seeing friends at all. I love biking, but it requires more time than I have most weeks, so I've picked up running (reluctantly), since I can do it when I just have 20 minutes. Alex Cavoulacos @dailymuse reduce or eliminate multi-tasking. Be where you are!— kylie sachs (@tismoi) November 24, 20135. Instead of multi-tasking, I look for ways to overlap things. Best example: When my kids were little, I had no time for hobbies, but I was dying to try birdwatching. So I introduced it to my seven-year old son, thinking he might like it, too. He was hooked, and so we started doing birdwatching together. It became the perfect overlap of time together with a hobby for me. Kate White6. We need to elongate the time frame upon which we judge the balance in our life, but we need to elongate it without falling into the trap of the "I'll have a life when I retire, when my kids have left home, when my wife has divorced me, my health is failing, I've got no mates or interests left." A day is too short; "after I retire" is too long. There's got to be a middle way. Nigel Marsh

Taking Time for You

7. It's important to remember that free time doesn't have to be available time. In other words, just because Wednesday night is empty on your calendar, doesn't mean you have to say "yes" when your co-worker asks you to go to an event with her. It’s important to remind yourself that you can turn invitations down for no other reason than you want that time to yourself, that your free time can be just that—free. Erin Greenawald8. When I have a good chunk of time to myself, I sometimes feel obligated to use it to get other things done, like errands or phone calls—but I’ve learned that the only way to use that time to truly reduce my stress level is to do something totally for me. A yoga class or quick burst of exercise is a good method to calm your spinning head, or enjoy some light-hearted TV or an ice cream or coffee date with a friend. You could also spend an hour playing with the puppies at the pet store, indulging in the total silence of a library, or browsing for random treasures at a thrift store. Jessica Taylor9. I block out "me time" in the early evening. Even if I know that I'm going to get back online later and work, I realized that I'm a lot more likely to go to the gym, see friends, or cook myself a real dinner if I give myself 7-9 PM "off" to do those things before getting back online. If I finish all my work first, or even "just do my high priority work"—it's 11 PM before I stop, and I am realistically not going to go to the gym or call anyone up or even cook, I'm just going to finish my work for the night and crash. Melissa McCreery@dailymuse I use my lunchtime to do some fun stuff - short market/store trips current fave #worklifebalancetips— Kitchenbutterfly (@Kitchnbutterfly) November 23, 201311. Even if I’m feeling busy, I remind myself that time away from work and the computer is energizing and important. Scheduling downtime requires a combination of time management (deciding when else to get the work done), working ahead when possible (so I have more time later), and keeping a to-do list. Miriam Salpeter 

Having a Social Life

12. While you usually reserve fun things for the weekends, plan at least one enjoyable activity during the week. You'll be able to head into your work week with something to look forward to and have a way to blow off some steam if the week starts off too strong. Katie Douthwaite@dailymuse I look for activities that incorporate work and play so I can kill two birds with one stone, such as mixers and networking events — Desirée M. (@ImDesi) November 23, 201314. Schedule recurring social activities, like a monthly book club or weekly dinner with your best friends. By having regular activities like this written into your calendar, you'll be able to plan around them (instead of planning your social life around work).@dailymuse Set times for yourself. If you reserve an evening for plans with friends/family, you'll focus more during the day.— Melanie Albert (@melealbert) November 24, 2013

Managing Work

16. You’ll be hard pressed to find a boss who will object too much to you working on your off hours (unless she’s required to by law), but that same boss will be just as impressed if you can do the work in the eight (OK, 10) hours each day you’re there already. Make the most of the time you have in the office, and leave the rest for tomorrow. Jennifer Winter17. If you start telling people you need to leave at a certain time, you’ll be much more likely to do so. Make the commitment to yourself, and then share it with others: As you discuss plans and assignments throughout the day, tell your colleagues, “I’ve got to be out of here on time tonight, so if you need something, let me know by 3 PM.” Try this method one day, then another, and then the next. Eventually, you’ll retrain your colleagues to expect you to leave on time every day. Lea McLeod18. Ever find yourself staying at work because you don't have a reason not to? Make reasons to leave. Join groups or sign up for exercises classes that meet after work so you have to sign out at a reasonable hour. Make plans with friends ahead of time so you can't back out and just stick around the office.@dailymuse Methods of #renewal(meditation) coupled with finding projects in the work environment that are #enjoyable help maintain balance— Paul A. Mabelis (@CognitiveLibert) November 23, 201320. You have to plan when you'll leave the office from the beginning of the day. That means understanding what needs to get done for the day and getting it done first so you aren't scrambling after hours to finish up. Also, block out the last 20 minutes before you plan to leave to wrap up loose ends, so you aren't trying to send "one more email" after you were already supposed to head out of the office.21. Sometimes when you feel surrounded by work, it’s because, well, you’re surrounding yourself with work. So, be deliberate about taking time before work, after work, or on your lunch break to step away from the office. Call your significant other, your mom, or your best friend, and ask what’s going on with them, avoiding the temptation to discuss anything even remotely work-related. Your job may be your focus for the rest of the day, but for a few minutes, move it to the back burner and focus on something (anything) else. Sara McCord22. Consider some highlights of your perfect day. What would you really enjoy doing? What’s absolutely necessary for you to get done? Identify what tools or extras would make the mandatory work easier to complete. Aromatherapy while you grade papers? A powerful run? Figure out what can help you, and build it into your day. Natalie Jesionka

Enjoying Weekends and Vacation

23. Instead of saving all of your life chores for Sunday, get them out of the way as soon as possible, either by doing them first thing Saturday morning or dispersing them throughout the week. That way, instead of spending your last few hours of free time on Sunday night scrubbing the bathtub, you'll be able to fill it with something fun and relaxing. Katie Douthwaite24. Carve out some time on the weekends—at least a few hours, but ideally a whole day—to stay away from screens. Put your computer and phone away and turn off the TV, then do something physical or creative that you really love. Go for a run. Draw. Write. Your mind will be a little more refreshed and a little sharper by the end of it.25. I always faced a double-edged sword on the weekends: I loved the feeling of being ahead on Monday morning if I worked during the weekend, but I hated the feeling of losing any of my precious weekend to work. Then, I started doing some of the more mindless work on my plate while I watched a movie on Sunday nights. I still felt like I got a full weekend, but felt ahead of the game come Monday morning. Erin Greenawald@dailymuse Using my vacation time! For me traveling is relaxing and mentally enriching. I come back to work happier and more focused.— Brandi Kolmer (@brandikolmer) November 23, 201327. The nature of many jobs is that there will never be an easy time to take time off, no matter how well you plan for it in advance. But that's no reason to not go at all. It's in your employer's best interests to have well-rested and recharged employees, and vacation time is a benefit that you've earned, just like salary, so you should use it. So instead of waiting for the perfect time—which may never come along—decide that you will use your vacation time this year, and make the question one of what accommodations should be made, rather than whether accommodations can be made. Alison Green28. Before you leave for vacation, ask your boss if she expects you to check emails or listen to voice messages while you’re gone. While it’s often necessary to stay at least a little connected, make sure you proactively set some boundaries. Feel free to let your boss know that you’ll only be able to check your phone and email occasionally—say, once a day, or a few times a week. Most bosses will be fine if you only respond to critical messages until after you return to the office. Lynze Wardle Lenio29. If you don't have enough PTO to take a full vacation, try taking a day off here and there for a stay-cation or long weekend. It may not seem like much, but taking just a day or two to break out of the 9-to-5 grind can do wonders.

Making Time for Family

30. There is a phrase used by Hillary Clinton that stems from an African proverb: “It takes a village.” And it does! Getting comfortable with others lending you a hand helps not only to give you comfort that your kids are in good hands, but it helps take the stress away. I chose to have live-in help because I had an unpredictable schedule, lots of travel, late hours, and evening entertaining, and I couldn’t have someone who had to look at the clock or bus schedule. But no matter what type of babysitter, nanny, or daycare choices you make, accepting that you just cannot do it all, single-handedly, is the key. Cathie Black31. When my baby was five months old, my husband and I decided to sleep train him (which basically meant letting him cry it out for three nights in a row). Those nights were extremely hard, but the upside has been nothing short of amazing. Not only do I know that each night from 7:30 PM to 6:30 AM I'll have time to do whatever I want—eat dinner with my husband, catch up on email, watch House of Cards—but our son is so much more rested and in all around better spirits. I know sleep training can be controversial, but as a working parent, I have no doubt it was one of the best things I've done for myself, my relationship, and my baby. Dorothy McGivney32. If you or your parenting partner is able to web-surf at work, use your downtime to set up auto-ship services for the essentials: diapers, toilet paper, paper towels, and so on. Services like Amazon Prime and Diapers.com sell these items on the cheap, and they’ll be delivered to your door with free shipping. Rikki Rogers33. Flexible hours enabled by technology can allow parents to perform well at their jobs and take care of young children at the same time. If you're an employee, talk with your boss about how working from home could boost your productivity, remembering to share some specific examples of how your work will improve. Richard Branson

Getting Chores Done

34. Make your grocery run as efficient as possible by making a list coordinated to aisles or store sections. Take advantage of coupon apps (many grocery stores have them). And if the whole family has to come along, get everyone involved: If you can walk, you can shop. Rikki Rogers35. By doing my least favorite chore at the beginning of each week, it feels entirely more manageable, not to mention frees me of the burden throughout the rest of my week. The feeling of work burnout tends to increase as the week moves forward, so by frontloading your work week evenings with your least favorite tasks, you can reserve the more enjoyable work night activities for the end of the week. Monday is for laundry, Tuesday is for vacuuming and bills, Wednesday is for dry cleaning, Thursday is for a DVR marathon. And so on. Rachell Buell36. When trying to fit more in, minimize the amount of time doing anything you have to do. Try setting a goal to have dinner ready in 30 minutes or less. You'd be surprised how many things can be cooked in 25-30 minutes, and it's a surefire way of getting time back several times a week. Bonus points for cooking several meals' worth on Sunday night and only having five minutes of reheat time.37. Get creative with what chores you can outsource (and therefore avoid!). There are plenty of services out there that will take care of your least favorite tasks for you, from cleaning and cooking to laundry and shopping. Check out our list of tasks to outsource now to get you started Read the full article

[jenmedsbookreviews]

Yes … believe it or not, it is getting to that point in the year that we both welcome and dread. Christmas. You may have missed it, but I’ve started posting a few festive reads on the blog over the past few days, just something Mandie and I thought (back in July/August) was a really good idea. Possibly not as we’re about as enthusiastic about Christmas as the Grinch, but hey ho (ho ho), it’s not all bad. I think. Do stop by for a few festive reading tips won’t you? Hopefully there’s a little something for everyone from the cosy and the kiddie, right through to the dark and the deadly. Always room for a little festive crime right?

Well, I had a busy old week last week achieving not a lot whilst seemingly doing loads. The week started perfectly – I was only at work for half a day before I was heading off down to London for November’s First Monday Crime panel. This month saw Barry Forshaw interview Stuart MacBride, Elodie Harper, Vaseem Khan and Simon Booker. An interesting debate was had by all regarding the idea of crime fiction v ‘literary fiction’, biggest mistakes made by newbie writers and whether there should be limits on how far you take your crime fiction.

A fantastic panel and I can heartily recommend both their books and First Monday Crime and if you want to find out more about next months panel, you can do so at their website here. December’s panel promises to be a doozy with Chris Whitaker, Louise Jensen, Mel McGrath and Susi Holliday alongside chair Claire McGowan. On top of that you’ll get to witness ‘Pitch the Audience’ where MC Howard Linskey will try to corral Rod Reynolds, Abir Mukherjee, Cass Green, Leye Adenle, Susi Holliday, Derek Farrell, Lisa Cutts, Chris Whitaker, Mason Cross, and James Carol as they bid to become ‘Pitch the Audience’ Champions for 2017. And books and pub visits. What more could you want? I’m booked. Maybe see you there?

And speaking of books, couldn’t resist the opportunity of getting a couple of signed books while I was there. Well … I went all that way. 😉

Book post wise, it’s been quite a quiet week for me. Nowt new there then lol. Just the one, a copy of Sai-Ko from author Gabriela Harding. Can’t wait to take a trip to the dark side with these short stories.

Other purchase wise, I’ve been good. At least if you own Amazon lol. I purchased the Killer Women Crime Club Book 2, Give Me The Child by Mel McGrath (also on audio); Little Liar by Clare Boyd and The Death Knock by Elodie Harper. From Netgalley, just the one, Know Me Now by CJ Carver. Also on audible was WhiteOut by Ragnar Jonasson. Well a girl needs to have the whole set.

Reading wise it’s been a bit of a mixed bag as my head is all over the place with work. I have managed 3.4 books though – one of them being a collection of short stories.

Books I have read

A Christmas Wish by Erin Green

Flora Phillips has an excuse for every disaster in her life; she was abandoned as a new-born on a doorstep one cold autumn night, wrapped in nothing but a towel. Her philosophy is simple: if your mother doesn’t want you – who will?

Now a thirty-year-old, without a boyfriend, a career or home she figures she might as well tackle the biggest question of them all – who is she? So, whilst everyone else enjoys their Christmas Eve traditions, Flora escapes the masses and drives to the village of Pooley to seek a specific doorstep. Her doorstep.

But in Pooley she finds more than her life story. She finds friends, laughter, and perhaps even a love to last a lifetime. Because once you know where you come from, it’s so much easier to know where you’re going.

A story of redemption and love, romance and Christmas dreams-come-true, the perfect novel to snuggle up with this festive season.

A wonderfully uplifting and heart warming tale of Flora, a woman who is in search of her birth mother having been left on a doorstep as a baby. Great for Christmas, my review of this book will be on the blog this week. In the meantime you can buy a copy of the book here.

…

The Advent Killer by Alastair Gunn

Christmas is coming. One body at a time. 

Three weeks before Christmas: Sunday, one a.m. A woman is drowned in her bathtub.

One week later: Sunday, one a.m. A woman is beaten savagely to death, every bone in her body broken.

Another week brings another victim.

As panic spreads across London, DCI Antonia Hawkins, leading her first murder investigation, must stop a cold, careful killer whose twisted motives can only be guessed at, before the next body is found. On Sunday.

When the clock strikes one . . .

A terrifying British debut thriller, The Advent Killer introduces DCI Antonia Hawkins, with the second in the series coming from Penguin in 2014. Fans of Chris Carter and Richard Montanari should be paying attention.

Now Christmas and murder … finally something I can identify with. Not literally of course and not in quite so gruesome a fashion as is presented in Alastair Gunn’s debut novel  I’ll be sharing my thoughts on this one very soon as one of my ‘festive reads’. You can buy a copy of the book here.

…

Twelve Slays of Christmas by Jacqueline Frost

When Holly White’s fiancé cancels their Christmas Eve wedding with less than two weeks to go, Holly heads home with a broken heart. Lucky for her, home in historic Mistletoe, Maine is magical during Christmastime—exactly what the doctor prescribed. Except her plan to drown her troubles in peppermints and snickerdoodles is upended when local grouch and president of the Mistletoe Historical Society Margaret Fenwick is bludgeoned and left in the sleigh display at Reindeer Games, Holly’s family tree farm.

When the murder weapon is revealed as one of the wooden stakes used to identify trees on the farm, Sheriff Evan Grey turns to Holly’s father, Bud, and the Reindeer Games staff. And it doesn’t help that Bud and the reindeer keeper were each seen arguing with Margaret just before her death. But Holly knows her father, and is determined to exonerate him.The jingle bells are ringing, the clock is ticking, and if Holly doesn’t watch out, she’ll end up on Santa’s naughty list in Twelve Slays of Christmas, Jacqueline Frost’s jolly series debut.

After a bit of a gruesome murder, it was time to go all cosy. This is a beautiful book, full of all the festive spirit a lover of the season could want. Give or take the odd murder … I’ll be reviewing this very soon but you can buy yourself a copy right here.

…

CWA Anthology of Short Stories: Mystery Tour

Crime spreads across the globe in this new collection of short stories from the Crime Writer’s Association, as a conspiracy of prominent crime authors take you on a world mystery tour. Highlights of the trip include a treacherous cruise to French Polynesia, a horrifying trek in South Africa, a murderous train-ride across Ukraine and a vengeful killing in Mumbai. But back home in the UK, life isn’t so easy either. Dead bodies turn up on the backstreets of Glasgow, crime writers turn words into deeds at literary events, and Lady Luck seems to guide the fate of a Twickenham hood. Showcasing the range, breadth and vitality of the contemporary crime-fiction genre, these twenty-eight chilling and unputdownable stories will take you on a trip you’ll never forget.

Contributions from: Ann Cleeves, C.L. Taylor, Susi Holliday, Martin Edwards, Anna Mazzola, Carol Anne Davis, Cath Staincliffe, Chris Simms, Christine Poulson, Ed James, Gordon Brown, J.M. Hewitt, Judith Cutler, Julia Crouch, Kate Ellis, Kate Rhodes, Martine Bailey, Michael Stanley, Maxim Jakubowski, Paul Charles, Paul Gitsham, Peter Lovesey, Ragnar Jónasson, Sarah Rayne, Shawn Reilly Simmons, Vaseem Khan, William Ryan and William Burton McCormick

A brilliant collection of short stories and perfect for dipping in and out of, which is exactly what I’m doing ahead of my stop on the blog tour next week. Featuring some of the best crime writers around, you’d be mad to miss it. I’ve already powered through 34% of the book without even realising it. You can preorder a copy here.

…

Blogging wise, not quite as traumatic as last week, i.e. you haven’t had to suffer any more videos of me, but still busy none-the-less.

#BlogTour: Whiteout by Ragnar Jonasson

#Review: Zenka by Alison Brodie

Festive Reads: Mr Men & Little Miss at Christmas

Festive Reads: This Way To Christmas by Anita Bijsterbosh and Christmas Stories for Kids by Uncle Amon

Festive Reads: Enid Blyton’s Christmas Tales

Festive Reads: Santa, Please Bring Me A Gnome by An Swerts

#BlogTour: #IntoTheValley by Chris Clement-Green

#BookLove: Tracy Fenton

Review: Mr Men & Little Miss for Grown UpsFestive Reads: A Christmas Flower by Bryan Mooneyffiths163

#BlogTour: Bad Sister by Sam Carrington

Review: Elephant and Sheep and other stories by Patricia Furstenberg

The week ahead is another full one – are there any other kind. Personally, I am off to the UK launch of The Man Who Died by Antti Tuomainen on Wednesday and I can’t wait. It’s in the running to be my book of the year! Then the weekend sees the long awaited arrival of Hull Noir. Looking forward to lots of brilliant panels and getting to catch up with some amazing blogger friends.

In the meantime, I’ve a mixture of the usual reviews and blog tours to keep you all amused, starting today when I’ll be reviewing The Puppet Master by Abigail Osborne. Wednesday is the tour for The Future Can’t Wait by Angelena Boden and Saturday it’s Dying Day by Stephen Edger. And there will be some sharing of the #booklove with blogger Victoria Goldman.

And in other news – with the notable and excusable exception of Christmas Day and Boxing Day, today marks a whole year of posting every day, at least once, sometimes more. I set myself the challenge to see how long I could keep it up and I have to admit I am fluffing knackered now, but hey. Quite an achievement for a moderately busy gal like me I think. Go me. May have to celebrate.

Have a brilliant week all. See you on the other side

Jen

Rewind, recap: Weekly update w/e 12/11/17 Yes ... believe it or not, it is getting to that point in the year that we both welcome and dread.

[junker-town]

NFL Dad, Week 8: Halloween is my daughter’s Super Bowl

Here’s what seven hours of RedZone is like when your two young kids can’t go outside because it’s raining.

As a lazy person, it’s hard to enjoy Halloween. When I was single, the thought and effort that a costume required always made me want to crawl in bed and hide from the holiday. Only the promise of alcohol and sexy costumes lured me into participation.

Kids have changed all that. As a parent, you get to spend WEEKS hyping up your kids for Halloween, brainstorming costume ideas, and talking about candy. The last part is especially fun, because my wife and I deprive our children of candy all year long. Cake? Sure, if there’s a party. A donut? Probably once a week. Ice cream? Well, maybe as a special treat. But candy almost never happens, save for the occasional lollipop at the doctor’s office. Halloween is their Super Bowl.

And even though trick-or-treating is only one night, we are getting some MILEAGE out of this year’s costumes — shark for my son (our choice), ghost for my daughter (her choice). Last Sunday, our friends had a Halloween-themed birthday party. On Friday, our nanny took the kids to a costume party. Monday: another Halloween party. Tuesday: daughter wears costume to school AND we’ve got trick-or-treating that night. I am getting to be a PRO at hand-washing chocolate out of these costumes. And I’m barely a day away from stealing half my kids’ candy after they go to bed Tuesday night.

So much of the parent experience is trading away the things you used to love to do for soul-filling love and constant exhaustion; it’s a surprise and a delight when the trade is suddenly enjoying something you never liked as an adult.

EARLY GAMES, FIRST HALF

— RedZone has seven early games on the docket today, and Scott Hanson shows us the lineup in OCTOBOX format, with the eighth box a weather map of the Eastern seaboard. The forecast: lots of rain.

— It’s raining here in New York, too. I took some photos of my kids in their rain slickers, but I’m not going to share them because my son’s hair looks like Jon Gruden’s. And maybe Gruden’s OK being seen in public with that hair, but I’m going to raise my children better than that.

Maybe Gruden’s OK being seen with that haircut, but I’m going to raise my children better than that.

Incidentally, I took the photos on the way to get his hair cut. I asked for a low fade and the barber gave him a high fade that wasn’t blended very well, so he ended up with the preferred haircut of stylish soccer players and media-savvy Nazis. And let me be crystal clear: My 18-month-old son is not a neo-Nazi. He doesn’t even have a Reddit account.

— The Saints’ Alvin Kamara scores the first touchdown of the day, and I reject this world where Drew Brees relies on a competent running game. THROW FOR 5000 YARDS OR RETIRE!

I like Kamara, though. I’m not messing with anyone whose name is a jiu-jitsu submission.

— I put my daughter down for her nap, and when I come back to the living room, Melvin Gordon is running untouched for an 87-yard TD to give the Chargers an early 7-0 lead over the Pats. I picked the Chargers at +7 today, so this pleases me.

HE WILL GO ALL THE WAY!@melvingordon25. 87 yards to the HOUSE. #Chargers http://pic.twitter.com/mOTI7SKWm9

— NFL (@NFL) October 29, 2017

— I’m a little worried about my daughter’s nap. We’re potty-training her right now — she’s behind schedule, I KNOW, the broken collarbone really set us back — and she wouldn’t pee on the little toddler potty before her nap. She hasn’t peed since we changed her overnight diaper and put her in undies this morning. You can lead a toddler to the potty, but you can’t make her pee.

So my wife and I tell her, “Hey, if you feel you have to go pee-pee, call us and we’ll help you use the potty.” But the last couple days, this has just led to a wet bed and more laundry. YAY, MORE LAUNDRY!

— Wait, we gotta talk about C.J. Beathard’s face. The camera cut to him and he BARELY had more confidence and composure than Bill Paxton in Aliens.

Photo by Elsa/Getty Images

You can smell the fear on him.

— With the score tied at 7 at MetLife, Matt Ryan loses a fumbled snap for the second time today that leads to a Jets field goal. I know it’s raining, but it’s also still the first half. Get your shit together, Falcons. Or don’t, I picked the Jets +4.5.

— Ah, I see the Colts are in the red zone. Time for a nap!

— I open my eyes 24 minutes later, and the only eye-raising change in scoring is in New England, where the Pats have improved from a 7-7 lead to take the lead, 12-7. Apparently, Travis Benjamin crapped his brain out of his butt in the middle of a punt return.

Worth it for the refs signaling safety at the exact same time, though.

— I’m typing today with a Band-Aid on my right index finger, having sliced my fingertip with a pumpkin saw while carving our jack-o’-lantern the night before. No medical attention needed, but I lost a little flap of skin that has me playing through pain today. I’m a gamer, though. Don’t worry about it affecting the column.

— Cincinnati, playing at home against the Colts, has had a lackluster first half, but this Joe Mixon screen is electric.

.@andydalton14 finds @Joe_MainMixon and he nearly goes the distance! #Bengals50 http://pic.twitter.com/saSRSZiC9C

— NFL (@NFL) October 29, 2017

That sets up a short touchdown to A.J. Green to tie the game at 10.

POINT OF ORDER: I will be actively avoiding this game the rest of the afternoon. These teams are butt. Also, I have yet to mention Carolina-Tampa Bay at all today. That is not an accident.

— Josh McCown tosses a gorgeous sideline throw to Robby Anderson, who got past Desmond Trufant. It’s 17-10 Jets, and if they win today I’m calling it: The Falcons are trapped in a body-swap movie.

— This morning I went to church with my family, and this may surprise you, but toddlers aren’t really wired for an hour of Catholic mass. I took the kids out to the adjoining courtyard so they could burn off some steam. The rain had let up but it was still wet, so naturally they both immediately fell on their faces/butts and got soaked.

They kept playing, though. The key feature of the courtyard was a four-foot ramp at a 15- or 20-degree angle. My daughter ran down it repeatedly, each time saying, “I shoot down the slide!” My son is also eager to run down the ramp, but he’s only a year and a half old — he’s barely mastered walking. He’s all desire, no skill.* So I stage at the bottom of the ramp and catch him before he can eat a face full of concrete.

*This sentence also sums up my athletic career after the age of 11.

Every generation has its Ted Ginn.

— The Bills score a defensive touchdown to open up a commanding lead on the Raiders, then Steven Hauschka forces a fumble on the ensuing kickoff. And I saw a lot of love and surprise on Twitter — “Wow! The kicker!” — but not nearly enough people were pointing at the exquisitely talented doofus who fumbled: Cordarrelle Patterson. He can’t do something awesome without disappointing you the following week. Every generation has its Ted Ginn, it seems.

EARLY GAMES, SECOND HALF

— My wife is taking the lead on tonight’s dinner, a pot roast recipe from Ina Garten. Now, I love Ina Garten; she’s a total boss. But if you’re going to try a recipe of hers, know that:

It will require a cut of meat that costs a staggering amount of money. “I go to my butcher and get four pounds of filet...” (Recipe serves 2.)

It will require about 150% of the work in any other cookbook to taste maybe 10% better. Related: Ina Garten does not have children.

She will demand that you use “good olive oil.” It is never just “olive oil.” Ina suspects you have cheap olive oil and a separate bottle of good stuff for special occasions. Guess what, bitch? EVERY INA GARTEN RECIPE IS A SPECIAL OCCASION. Don’t disrespect her art with shitty olive oil!

— Behold, the majesty of a Philip Rivers pump fake:

Let’s check in on Philip Rivers http://pic.twitter.com/MbkDJysXMe

— Pete Blackburn (@PeteBlackburn) October 29, 2017

Rivers recovered his own fumble (the least he could do after forcing it), and on the very next play, he hucks it downfield. When the ball re-enters the atmosphere, there is one Chargers receiver on the screen, and SIX Patriots defenders.

Next play: Throws into sextuple coverage http://pic.twitter.com/Yhbo2I2EhU

— Pete Blackburn (@PeteBlackburn) October 29, 2017

I love that intense weirdo SO MUCH. The Philip Rivers Quarterback Experience is like if the star of the debate team also had Tourette’s.

— My wife: “You picked great leeks, Matt.” Hell yeah I did! I have an eye for fine produce. But chopping four leeks and two large onions in a small apartment with all the bedroom doors closed is tough sledding for people with sensitive eyes. I open a window three inches; rain INSTANTLY soaks five children’s books on the sill.

— With the Bears trailing 14-3, Mitchell Trubisky throws to Zach Miller, who makes a great catch for the touchdown! Oh no, Miller stays down. Seems hurt. OH GOD I SAW THE REPLAY. Look away from the TV! Look at the computer! OH GOD I SAW THE GIF. UGHUGHGHHHHHH. (Update: Miller almost lost his leg due to vascular damage. Jesus.)

Dude, I JUST saw Gordon Hayward’s ankle snapped on live TV a few days ago. Hey, sports? Can we go a week or two without maiming someone, please?

AND THEY OVERTURNED THE TOUCHDOWN. WTF, YOU REFS ARE ANIMALS.

If you break your leg on the catch it should be a catch

— Evil Dead 2 Magary (@drewmagary) October 29, 2017

If you break your leg while even vaguely holding onto the ball it should always be ruled a catch

— Pablo S. Torre (@PabloTorre) October 29, 2017

— My daughter calls us, much more urgently than she usually does after her nap. My wife rushes in. Incredibly, my kid held her piss in throughout her nap, and actually used the potty. HUZZAH!

Even more incredibly, she didn’t pee between 7:00 a.m. and 3:30 p.m. NOT GREAT. We’re gonna have to get better about that or next week’s column is gonna be about bladder infections.

— Here’s a cool Alshon Jeffery touchdown:

"GET OFF ME." - @TheWorldof_AJ, probably. Touchdown, @Eagles! #FlyEaglesFly http://pic.twitter.com/aMeckAYr3i

— NFL (@NFL) October 29, 2017

Consider that the shot that puts this one away for the Eagles. And now a 49ers chaser:

Fun stat: 49ers have only won three of their last 27 games, all of them against the Rams.

— Vince Mancini (@Filmdrunk) October 29, 2017

— I have a note that just says, “rasperries and laughter,” but I no longer remember the specific context. I think my daughter was laughing because my son was trying to blow raspberries on her, so I pulled up his shirt and blew raspberries on his stomach, causing him to shriek with laughter. That sounds right, but I could be mixing that up with other memories.

(I should note that in between writing that three-word note and trying to expand it into a paragraph, I watched Texans-Seahawks and Game 5 of the World Series. My brain has been puréed into a sports smoothie with an Adrenaline Boost™. A day later, I only see my two children in the context of lead changes. Great hug! I love THIS one more now!)

— On 3rd and goal, Matt Ryan scrambles to his left and finds Mohammed Sanu at the back of the end zone to give the Falcons a 22-17 lead. Ryan then fumbles the snap on the two-point conversion. Even when the Falcons are winning this year, they do it in the least convincing way possible.

Even when the Falcons are winning, they do it in the least convincing way.

— My wife takes the dog for a walk in the rain, as well as the kettlebell with legs that passes for my younger child. My daughter cuddles next to me on the couch. I put my arm around her and give her context about the teams on the field (“Do you know what a buccaneer is?” —No. “A buccaneer is a pirate”), but mostly, we sit together quietly. This is approximately as content and fulfilled as I can be.

— PERSONAL GAMBLING HELL UPDATE: The Jets, trailing 22-20, are about to get the ball back late in the game and look like excellent candidates to cover the 4.5-point spread. They fumble the punt because they’re the GODDAMN IDIOT JETS. The Falcons OF COURSE kick a field goal to go up by five. New York will have a chance to win the game if they can go 90 yards with no timeouts in 50 seconds, but I don’t need to give you the details on why that doesn’t work out.

The Pats kick a field goal to take an eight-point lead with one minute remaining, and I agonize over the Chargers’ mistakes that will cost them a cover: Benjamin’s idiotic safety, a failed two-point conversion. I am SO happy I don’t put actual money on these games. I would ruin my family.

The Saints have the ball, a five-point lead, and a pressing need for one more score to cover 9 points at home. Stupid Bears. There’s a glimmer of hope after Brees throws a bomb downfield, but shortly after Mark Ingram loses a fumble — his second of the game — and the Bears have a chance to win. (The Bears do not capitalize. The Saints kick a field goal at the end of the game to push the lead to 8. THANKS FOR NOTHING, JERK-ASS.)

— A Bengals defensive lineman makes an incredible play for a pick-6 that gives Cincy the lead. This game is still butt, but at least it’s functionally over.

— Wife and son and dog are back, and I dry my dog off with an old towel. When Stella gets wet, she obsesses over drying off. She gleefully wags her entire body into the towel, and she rubs her face in between my legs to dry her face off.

Yes, a 65-pound dog shoving its face under your crotch is disconcerting.

And in case you’re wondering, a 65-pound dog forcefully shoving her face under your crotch is SUPER disconcerting. I’ve had her for a decade, so I’m used to it now, but she’s also done it to strangers before. It’s a helluva way to meet your neighbors.

— Philip Rivers has no timeouts and a running clock to get a touchdown. And if you thought the self-fumble and sextuple-coverage heave was his two-play highlight of the day, AU CONTRAIRE. T’was merely an appetizer for this delicacy:

Philip Rivers emphatically celebrating a spike with 1 second left is the most Philip Rivers thing I've seen since Week 1 #Chargers http://pic.twitter.com/SOXBeKM78I

— Clay Wendler (@ClayWendler) October 29, 2017

The next and final play is an interception floated into the arms of a Pats defender. In fact, there seem to be about five Patriots closer to making a play on the ball than the nearest Charger.

Philip Rivers losing it dot gif http://pic.twitter.com/oSpwAlCBPX

— Vikings Blogger (@firstandskol) October 29, 2017

I’m gonna miss that guy when he’s gone.

LATE GAMES, FIRST HALF

— With six teams on bye, there are only two late games for RedZone to toggle between: Texans-Seahawks and Cowboys-Washington. They’re good games, but at some point I’d almost prefer a commercial break to Scott Hanson narrating sponsored highlights. “No commercials here on RedZone! And now for Fantasy Feedback, presented by Genesis.”

— As a Seahawks fan, I’m cautiously optimistic about today. I think the offense will perform well, and the run defense can bottle up Lamar Miller. I expect DeAndre Hopkins to win a couple battles versus Richard Sherman, but over the course of the game, I expect the defense and crowd to be a little too much for a rookie quarterback, even one as good as Deshaun Watson.

My biggest concern early is actually Will Fuller. If the Texans can get him the ball early, before the Seahawks have a chance to adjust to how fast he is ... oh look, RedZone’s flipping to Seattle now.

.@deshaunwatson goes DEEEEEP. And @Will_Fuller7 gets behind the LOB for SIX. #Texans http://pic.twitter.com/vDFvZPVeiG

— NFL (@NFL) October 29, 2017

CRAP.

— The Texans continue to movie the ball with ease, but on 3rd and 10 with the Texans in field goal range, Earl Thomas jumps a route and takes it for six the other way.

Know where @Earl_Thomas is on the field at ALL times... PICK-6. #Seahawks #LOB http://pic.twitter.com/j4EZXZHlMs

— NFL (@NFL) October 29, 2017

Any time there’s an interception in the secondary, the analysts always say how the defensive back read the quarterback’s eyes. But there’s more to it than that:

Texans lined up Hopkins in the slot to get Sherman in space, Thomas had a pretty strong idea of where the ball was going.

— Bill Barnwell (@billbarnwell) October 29, 2017

Earl Thomas benefits from instincts and speed that most safeties would kill for, but he’s not just reading a quarterback’s eyes. Formations, route combinations, down and distance, and a quarterback’s tendencies all get plugged into a pre-snap calculus that helps Thomas figure out where the ball’s likely to go before the QB has even made a decision.

I’m not the kind of guy who watches All-22, but Earl Thomas makes me want to.

— Washington is wearing throwback uniforms, and I’m annoyed that their burgundies don’t match.

Photo by Patrick Smith/Getty Images

The jerseys are damn near purple, and while that may be partly due to the rain, the gold numbers are also markedly different than the yellow on the helmets.

And to you homers getting ready to mansplain it: I already KNOW that the NFL doesn’t let teams change their base helmets for any uniform. It’s a bad rule, and these uniforms look like ass because of it.

(Washington could have dealt with this by making the throwbacks match today’s helmets. All the old photos are black and white, who cares if the hue is historically accurate? I mean, if you want REALLY accurate Washington throwbacks, only the white players should wear them. Just the way George Marshall intended!)

— In an attempt to lessen our laundry workload by one percent, my wife tries to trick our daughter into organizing a pile of her socks into pairs. My daughter instantly recognizes that it’s a chore and hurls the socks around the room, resulting in one percent more work for us.

— Trailing 14-7, the Seahawks challenge a 3rd-and-2 incomplete pass. Russell Wilson had his throwing motion disrupted by Jadeveon Clowney, and Pete Carroll wants it ruled a fumble — the ball went downfield and was recovered by tight end Luke Willson.

This game is powered by hallucinogenic speedballs.

After review, the refs agree: First down, Seahawks. Finally, the Seahawks’ “Let defensive linemen assault our quarterback” offense is starting to pay off.

On the next play, Wilson throws a touchdown to Paul Richardson. It’s 14-14 in the first quarter, and this game is powered by hallucinogenic speedballs.

— The Cowboys go for it on 4th and 1 a few yards short of midfield. They’re down 10-7 early in the game — the circumstances aren’t dire, but it’s the sort of situation where the numbers say GO FOR IT while football coaches scream PUNT. It’s good to see Jason Garrett is willing to let his kickass line and Zeke Elliott execute those favorable odds. The Cowboys get the first.

— MIRACLE: Both of my kids are eating their dinner without complaint or hesitation. They ignore the TV to pay attention to the Halloween book my wife is reading. Years from now, when their grade school teacher praises their attention spans, I’m gonna get up in the middle of the parent-teacher conference and do Mick Jagger’s rooster strut.

— Crap, Will Fuller has another TD. Look at this awesome play design:

ANOTHER @Will_Fuller7 TD grab in Seattle! #Texans http://pic.twitter.com/4WroLy1s7A

— NFL (@NFL) October 29, 2017

Fuller now has seven touchdowns on, like, four catches this season.

Moments later, Russell Wilson responds with a downfield heave that Tanner McEvoy hauls in for a 53-yards gain. That sets up Paul Richardson’s second touchdown. Tie game again, 21-21.

— Washington kicks a field goal to go up 13-7. Or maybe 13-10? I dunno, it’s hard to pay much attention to this game. Dallas-Washington is like a football game in the rain when the other viewing option is a burning fireworks factory.

LATE GAMES, SECOND HALF

— Can I cut the bullshit for a second? I do not want to be a Seahawks fan narrating play-by-play for the game of the year that the Seahawks end up winning. That would be very fun to do for our Seahawks blog, but that’s more hollerin’ than I’d feel good about for this here national site.

From a slightly more objective viewpoint, I want to point out that the highlight package from this game is MORE THAN 12 MINUTES LONG. I’m going to embed the video even though the NFL usually blocks it from being played on any site but YouTube. That’s how good it is.

OK, back to diary mode. I promise: Minimal fist-pumping from here on out.

— After a sack pushes the Texans out of field goal range, Watson faces 3rd and 14. All he does is calmly avoid pressure, set up his downfield blocking (RIP Justin Coleman), and get just enough for the first down.

Patience. @DeshaunWatson sets up his blocking, rushes for first down. #Texans http://pic.twitter.com/lpLeEzEcnx

— NFL (@NFL) October 29, 2017

The Texans kick a field goal and retake the lead.

— The pot roast sauce is boiling, and my wife is busy giving our daughter a bath. I bring it down to a simmer, add a butter/flour mixture to thicken the sauce, and remove the scorched wood-handled spatula from its proximity to the burner. Man, a kitchen fire would have really spiced the end of this column up, huh?

— The Seahawks TWICE have to settle for field goals despite having the ball inside the Texans’ 5-yard line, and even though they have their first lead of the day, it feels like a missed opportunity. There’s no chance the Texans are done scoring touchdowns.

— Washington loses a fumble, and somewhere while I was paying attention to the better game, the Cowboys seized control of this game. With a better line and a better running game, the away team looks unlikely to cede the lead.

When the camera cuts to the sidelines, everyone looks miserable. And I don’t just mean the home team, I mean EVERYONE: the players, the fans, the camera operators, the refs. It’s SO MUCH rain. Playing sports in the rain can be fun, but I can’t imagine watching it for three hours while standing in a deluge. Not without Wellingtons, dry-fit winter socks, and three Camelbaks of whiskey and hot cider.

— I’ve been pausing RedZone on and off so I can help with the kids’ bedtime routine — bath time, pajamas, brushing teeth, etc. By the time they go to bed, the Cowboys are up by ten with a quarter to play, and there are 11 minutes left in the Texans-Seahawks game.

Rather than go haymaker-by-haymaker, I’m going to add up the numbers: In the final 11 minutes of that game, there are five plays of 34 yards or more, four touchdowns, and two interceptions. That’s half a season for the Browns!

— The pot roast is pretty good, by the way. Our entire apartment smells like red wine and red meat. Probably not worth the cost or the effort (in other words, a typical Ina Garten recipe), but this will be the foundation of three meals for us this week. Pre-made meals are the cornerstone of a good marriage when you have kids.

— Trailing by four, the Seahawks have 1:39 and no timeouts to get a touchdown. They go 80 yards in three plays. Paul Richardson goes up and steals a 48-yard bomb, Tyler Lockett snags a 19-yarder, and Jimmy Graham goes uncovered on the game-winning score. As a wildly cynical Seahawks fan, I am agog at the ease and speed with which they pull it off; I barely had time to worry about failure before they took the lead.

The defense does much the same thing: With two timeouts and 21 seconds, a game-tying field goal isn’t out of the question for the Texans -- it might even be an easy assumption given this game. But Frank Clark sacks Watson on first down, and Richard Sherman’s second pick ends the game. What an absolutely incredible game.

Two of the best in the game. #Seahawks #Texans http://pic.twitter.com/hlQx2dzYci

— NFL (@NFL) October 29, 2017

— It has come to my attention that I started Dak Prescott over Russell Wilson in fantasy football. WHOOPS.