#also scarian angst

[angeart]

things i didn't know i need in my life: bad boys as dog hybrids.

[tubbytarchia]

I need to know if Scar is the Watchers' favorite and they like to stir up crap with him, or if they're pissed that he defies the order they set by holding something from a previous life game so deep in his memory

Or if they're just pissed at Grian who, to his own dismay, buried himself into someone's memory when he's the only one who's supposed to remember past lives. And if the Watchers are using Scar to purposefully punish and mock the Grian who was only ever meant to watch. Or if it's all Scar, to consciously show that he hasn't forgotten and he knows Grian hasn't either. What if the Watchers (who believe to be manipulating him), like so many others have, see him as an oblivious fool, and what if Scar plays into that notion yet again as one of his greatest strengths

[pumpkakin]

Character notes for that old 3rd life timey-wimey au that I dont have a name for based on that one post. A lot of queer themes. (Disclaimer: history is not my thing, and the point of the au is not to explore the realities of the lives of queer people in these eras. They inform the characters' internal struggles, but are not meant to be the focus of the story)

Grian: London, 1893; an architect that stays closed up in his studio working. He is gay, and considering the era he lives in, he is ashamed and afriad of anyone finding out. Reserved, snappy, and a bit of a bastard underneath. He just wants to be accepted, but never believes it can happen.

Scar: California, 1987; former action super star. He's struggling to find work because he is a vocal advocate for gay rights. Optimistic, stubborn, and unwilling to pretend to be something he is not. He leaps without looking and seizes the moment when it comes. He's an incurable romantic <3

Jimmy: England, 1940; soldier, just drafted to join the war effort. He's not a fighter and is afraid of war; he doesn't think he will make it back. Brave (or foolhearty, depending on who you ask), sensitive, and loyal. He is a young romantic who dreamed of a great love and a family, but he is resigned to never having it.

Scott: UK, 2012; vlogger. His brand is similar to irl, based on that on vlog video he did a while back; openly gay. Cynical, sarcastic, and always teasing and poking fun. He is slow to love but loves deeply.

Scar and Grians story is seperate to Jimmy and Scotts. Flower husbands' is a lot sweeter and softer, while Scarian's is a story of Grian finding self acceptance through his love for Scar. They both end, however, in tragedy. Such is the nature of the game.

[w1ngedv01d]

Why is it when I start writing my brain wants to devote too much time to a subplot I didn't even INTEND to have innthere innthe FIRST PLACE.

Doing a Limited Life x Phasmo AU

Bad Boys centric

Scar was going to originally be an ally ghost hunter who works for a different company and occasionally helps them out unofficially

Now my brain has decided to meld some 3rd Life Scarian into the backstory, and he is Grian's ex-fiance and the reason Bad Boys just moved cities and have a ghost investigation company in the first place

And their breakup was 100% Scar's fault and it fucked Grian up

Hey. Hey brain? This was supposed to be a funky lil AU where Grian and the boys hunt ghosties and only Grian has a braincell. Where is this Scarian angst coming from- why are the only scenes you have ideas for about the Scarian angst?? Bestie that wasn't the point of the fic-

[reading-writing-dying]

Five weeks in a row of writing and posting a new chapter, please clap.

Hotguy/Cuteguy love-square fic chapter five is here! a little shorter this week meaning the fic is still just shy of 10,000 words but I've never written so many words on a single project before!

[gtwscratch]

Smart Decisions

Summary: Scar's left alone in the zombie apocalypse, having lost everyone he's cared about, but maybe he isn't entirely alone

CW: angst, mentions of death/grief/loss, self-deprecation, minor animal injury, mention of animal death(?? Scar sort of comes to that conclusion)

I promise you guys there's a happy ending

Word count: 1,558 words

===============================

Even before the zombie apocalypse started, Scar had never been known for making smart decisions. He acted before thinking—speaking, too—and was always too enthusiastic to enact plans that would always end in disaster. There was always someone telling him not to do this or that, but when you’re alone in the apocalypse, there’s no one to tell you what you can and can’t do.

So, if Scar wants to talk friendly to the undead like they aren’t trying to kill him? Perfectly fine! He wants to decorate his survival base to look nice? Hell yeah! Scar wants to waste his bullets and go a bit crazy to let off some steam? He’ll waste all the bullets he wants! Scar’s never had more freedom in his life.

That doesn’t distract him from the fact that everyone he once knew is gone, though. Every risky and stupid move he makes, he can almost hear their responses.

You know they’re not going to respond, right, says a dark-haired man with glasses, humor in his tone.

It looks nice, mate, but we should be focusing on fortifying it rather than making it look pretty, says a tall, lanky man with a mustache.

Scar! We need to save those! They’re a limited resource, says a short, blond man with beautiful, colorful wings.

Scar’s heart aches whenever he thinks of them. He misses them dearly. He replays what happened to them again and again, trying to think of what more he could’ve done to keep them alive. Maybe if he had gotten more serious, then he’d still have his brother. If he had been paying more attention, his friend wouldn’t have gotten bitten. If he hadn’t nodded off, his partner would still be with him, in his arms. But no matter how much he thinks, nothing will change. They’re gone, and Scar’s left alone, wondering why he’s the one still alive while the others are dead. He knows they wouldn’t want him to blame himself, but survivor’s guilt is a bitch.

He wanders through one of the empty buildings on a bright day. It’s been a rough morning, Scar having woken up from a night terror that involved pretty wings being torn apart. He just needs to take a good, long breather outside the safety of his home (more of a base than a home at this point, really). He knows the building’s clear, so he wanders freely through the third floor. He tries to ignore the night terror and the memories of that day, he really does. He does some breathing exercises, he tries to shake out the anxiety and bad feelings through his hands, and he tries to think up blueprint plans like when he was an engineer, but he can’t shake it. He’s overwhelmed with grief and panic, and it quickly turns to anger.

That shouldn’t have happened. None of it should have happened. They were all so capable, and they should have survived. 

They would have survived if it wasn’t for me.

Without thinking, Scar kicks over a trash can with an ugly cry. He flips a table. He grabs the baseball bat with nails sticking out of it that’s hanging at his waist and smashes an old computer with it. He breaks old mugs. He bashes and punches holes into the flimsy material of cubicles. He breaks a window. He throws a chair. He hears a yowl. He stomps- wait, he hears a yowl?

Scar is broken out of his sorrow and fury by the sound. He stops, going very quiet and still to hear the noise again. After a few moments, there's another yowl, quieter than the first one. He follows the sound to the overturned table and looks behind it. He blinks when he sees a little gray and white kitten cowering there.

He quickly wipes his eyes. When had he started crying? He kneels down and speaks softly. “Hey there, what’re you doing here all by yourself?” Scar reaches a gloved hand out.

The kitten hisses at him and bats at his hand, her tail fluffing up more than it already was. Scar coos softly to the kitten, trying to calm her. “It’s okay.. I’m not gonna hurt you.” Despite her hissing, he manages to carefully pick her up. Upon doing so, he notices her back left paw was injured. Or was it her right paw? Scar was never good at telling his right from his left.

He feels tears burn his eyes again, and shame fills his chest. “Oh, I’m sorry, did I cause that? I’m so, so sorry. I didn’t see you. I never would have thrown everything. I’m so sorry for scaring you. I’m sorry.” A few tears run down Scar’s face as he continuously apologizes to the small cat, petting her and trying to calm her down. Scar can see the fear in her eyes, and he gently shushes her.

“Here, stay still for a second, yeah?” he sniffles. “I think I’ve got some bandages on me.” 

He lets go of the cat, which, to his surprise, stays in his lap despite her fluffed-up, flicking tail. He pulls out a roll of bandages from his bag, sighing in relief. “Thank god I didn’t forget it this time.” He carefully tries to stretch out the kitten’s leg so he can wrap it, but he realizes his gloves are a little too padded to handle the bandages. He takes them off to work more easily, and he’s surprised at how soft her fur is despite it being matted in some spots. 

Scar takes a moment to gently scratch between her ears to relax her further. “You’re okay, see? I wasn’t trying to hurt you. I’m sorry.” He keeps petting her before carefully moving her leg. He’s careful as he wraps it and is quite impressed with how well-behaved the kitten is. Maybe she’s been just as lonely as him out here and wanted some company. That’s what Scar hoped at least. Not that he hopes she’s been alone! He just couldn’t think of another reason that she’d be so willing to let a stranger pick her up and pet her like this.

It doesn’t take long for him to be finished. “All right, there you go, little lady. How’s that feel?” Scar keeps his hands back. As much as he wants to keep petting her, he doesn’t want to smother her and scare her off. To his surprise, she butts her head against his stomach with a quiet, “mrow.”

Scar exhales shakily, smiling and wiping at his eyes again. He holds his hand out and smiles wider when she rubs her face against it. He scratches under her chin. 

“Well, aren’t you just a little sweetheart? I guess that means you accept the apology, huh?” Scar just sits there, continuing to pet her, and the kitten starts to purr. He stays like that for a long while before glancing out the window and notices the sun setting. Carefully, he picks her up off his lap and sets her on the ground. 

“Welp, I’ve got to get back to my survival shelter before it gets too dark. You see, it’s easier to evade all the undead when it’s light out and I can actually see them,” Scar explains. “I’m not like you with your night-vision eyes.”

She simply meows up at him as he stands. He smiles back at her, a sad smile. “You take care of yourself now, okay? Stay away from those zombie guys, and I hope that leg heals up soon.” He walks over to grab his bat, and the kitten meows again, a little louder. Scar looks over to see her limping towards him.

“No, no, you’ve got to stay here. I’m sure you’re mama will be here to get you soon,” he says as he hooks the bat to his belt again. “I’m sure she won’t be too happy to see you missing from where she left you.” He starts to walk to the stairwell, but her meows become louder and longer, like she’s demanding him to take her with him. He stops and looks over to her, the sight tugging at his heartstrings.

This poor little cat, so small in the middle of the torn-up office space, is limping towards him as quickly as she can. Scar wonders how long she’s been up here. How long she’s been without food. How long she’s been alone with no one to take care of her because surely, if she had a mother, her coat wouldn’t be so unkept and messy. 

Scar had never been known for making smart decisions, and maybe this wasn’t the smartest decision, but he knew that if he left this kitten here by herself, it would be the absolute dumbest thing he’s done in his entire life.

He walks over and scoops her up in one hand, holding her carefully to his chest. “Okay, okay, you win,” he says with a soft smile. “So pushy. Don’t expect to get your way like this all the time, your highness.” She simply meows at him and butts her head against his chest, purring once again, and Scar instantly knows that he’s going to spoil this cat as much as he can.

The two leave the building, and Scar’s heart is a little less broken than when he entered it.

===============================

This has been on my mind for literal MONTHS, and I'm so incredibly proud of the outcome. I hope you guys liked it as well!

I have another TDC idea where Scar is taken from that world and brought into Hermitcraft, but I have to do quite a bit more thinking on it, and that will have multiple parts to it :)

[the-lesbian-orpheus]

SCARS DEATH. THE DESERT DUO OF OT ALL. THE THIRD LIFE FLASHBACKS “it’s the ultimate betrayal”-G “you can’t just shoot a man in the back” -S “course I can” -G

Also Grian was starting to apologize- season one vibes but he goes “I’m s-“ and when he hears scar say you can’t do this- he changes his mind says he can LIKE- AHHH

Also the last thing scar hears before dying is G yelling “gotta go” which I know was in like a joke ish tone but THE ANGST POTENTIAL

Afkshskvdjajdhakdhiahdjqltusvxekakxtaldvjdjdgwudjgsjsbfhwidjhaidhskhduakdhjsbdvksksjdjakhd

“We’ve learned never turn our back on grian” ON THE FLOOR CRYING PUNCHING MY PILLOW AH who cares if he was just chillin in spectator mode the animatic people can do a lot with this.

These grown ass adults sitting behind their computers controlling little blocks have altered my fucking brain chemistry I can’t even- the block people are everything to me. Like I thought the canary curse and Joel’s response made go insane but this. THIS.

I don’t think I will get over limited life any time soon like all the 3rd life and double life parallels- even some last life moments I just- AHFSSKJH

Also here are more details that made me loose my mind in this section

-scar was behind grian while watching the chaos when he died even though he was cheering for everyone G was separate and he was near G

-Cleo died almost immediately after scar and the clockers were officially dead

- just scar mention getting shot/stabbed in the back at their little family reunion in the sky I-

-scar eagerly watching Grians death only to watch him walk away safe with a member of his own “family”. Also not to take away from the moment but scar writing dad i want to kill you now in the chat was hilarious to me idk why

-from Grians perspective early on: I was gonna cut scar some slack, but not anymore

- also in Grian’s perspective you can actually hear him say I’m sorry before the I’m s- and it’s so third life I can’t even

-“I did scar so dirty there- it was- he was- he had his back turned”

-Also the two of them goofing off in the sky in the end just funny and cute reunion

Also grian kept mentioning how he was lost without his bad boys(so real), but even though he had made an alliance, he spent around half of his episode focusing on scar and his team until they were gone. HAGSJAHHSKAGDJA Also, the fact that he is now a nosy neighbor which has BIGB of all people, and yet he does a 180 from double life and focuses on scar like AHH. and I could go into a whole side thing about sky sibling but not the time. Also don’t even get me started on grians “I can rebuild” moment and him running out of materials and clinging to he bad boys as his time ticks down because that can be a whole other ramble post. THIS is just my dessert duo brainworms lmfao

Time to listen to tongues and teeth on repeat for the s1 and s3 feels

If you actually read all that thanks for listening to my word vomit. :))

I will probably end up with lots more ramble posts when I finish all my usual perspectives so buckle in

EDIT: APPARENTLY GRIAN SAID “you gotta go” THATS SO MUCH WORSE/BETTER AJDHAKSHGAHAHSJ

[all54321]

Poppies Mean Death and Remembrance

For no particular reason, I decided to revisit the thing I wrote with the flower meanings thing. It originally came from thinking about them making flower crowns for each other during a date (on Hermitcraft), and then I wove in meanings and made it more painful. After some time, Scar stopped giving bouquets to Grian and instead just wove some into his hair.

—————

Grian trails after Scar, heart hurting. They really had to do this, didn’t they? He didn’t want to, but with the ghosts shouting in their ears, they don’t have much a choice.

He’s startled out of his thoughts as they cross through a field of flowers. While many were there, two specific flowers catches his attention. “Lilacs and poppies,” he murmurs.

Scar looks over his shoulder, turning slightly, just silently giving him a sad smile. Grian’s pain being mirrored in it.

Grian reaches up and touches the stem of the poppy still in his hair. Scar had woven one of each into his hair before the final battle started. After all the fighting and his respawn, they’re in a terrible state, but still hold strong.

Poppies mean death

The irony isn’t lost on him. He starts walking again, he can’t afford thinking on this more, it will make this all the more harder. Scar seems to agree as he continues walking as well.*

~

Grian looks down at the perilous drop down the cliff. Everything hurt, both physically and emotional. His tears haven’t stopped coming, but he’s no longer violently sobbing like before.

He reaches up and touches the poppy again, he wants to take it out to look at it, but he can’t bear to undo what Scar did. Not anymore.

“Poppies represent death,” he murmurs. He glances back at Scar’s body, unable to resist, “and remembrance.”

The irony cuts through his grief, maybe it was spelled out from the start.

Grian steps off the cliff before he can think on it too hard. The ground comes up fast and hard, but hurting a lot less then killing Scar did.

Poppies means remembrance.

~[Scar POV]~

Scar isn’t aware of the path his feet take him on, too lost in thought, until he sees the flowers. He unintentionally led them to where he collected the poppies and lilacs that he gifted to Grian.

“Lilacs and poppies,” Grian murmurs, realizing.

Scar turns around to give him a sad smile, realizing he never show Grian this place before. It hurts for Grian to see it now.

Grian reaches up and touches one of the steams in his hair, a sad look on his face. The flowers themselves are slightly wilted and missing a few petals. They still look beautiful, Grian still looks beautiful.

After a moment, Grian start walking again, Scar following a moment later. There isn’t anything for them to say. Not anymore. Not anything that won’t cause them more pain.

~

“Gri,” Scar chokes out, hovering next to Grian as he stands on a cliff. He knows what his lover is planning to do and he can’t stop it. Tears are still flowing down his guilt and grief stricken face.

Grian touches the poppy again, before murmuring, “poppies represent death.”

Scar winces at the irony, he never thought about their meaning before.

“And remembrance,” he murmurs, glancing over his shoulder.

An emotion flashes across his face, but before Scar can read it, Grian steps off the cliff. Scar reaches out, as if he can catch Grian, but misses and is forced to watch him fall to his death.

[the-speyeral]

When he was gifted his wings it was painful. Unlike any pain he had ever felt.

He could never forget how excruciating it was to feel them growing beneath his skin until they burst out. He could never forget how much blood there had been afterwards. The bleeding was constant for days.

The others had always sworn that it was normal, yet when he saw the other recently gifted, they were fine.

The pain never fully went away. There was always a stinging when he flew or his wings brushed against something.

He had been told it would be fine.

He had been told it would heal in hours.

He had been told that everyone else was going through or had gone through the exact same thing.

What bullshit.

How pathetic did they have to be? To lie to a child?

He just wished that never would have happened.

His wings even still hurt while he preened them. After nearly twenty years. And what did he get? More lies. More people saying he was lying.

He hated himself for falling for their lies, even if he had just been a kid. He guessed some part of him had just wanted something positive to be able to believe. Maybe he never fully believed it himself.

He remembered neglecting his wings for the first few months. Someone else would do it for him, and most of the time they would not be gentle.

He had fallen back into that habit after he was old enough to leave, then the habit left after he realized it only made things worse.

Well, that's what he wished. He really never liked just leaving them, but when they hurt that much he couldn't bring himself to touch his wings, he wouldn't.

For years after he left he was alone. There were people that were kind and people who had offered to help when they had seen the state of his wings. He was still alone.

Sometimes he wanted to get rid of them. Chop them off or something. Those were just thoughts though. Nothing he could ever be brave enough to act upon.

His wings had been in great condition when he had joined that server, but good things never last and his wings soon were filthy.

The players on that server had noticed and asked about it, saying he could talk to them if he needed. He never did. He thought it was all fake.

Then he joined their next season, and he felt closer to certain players. He didn't think he could call them his friends yet.

His wings never got particularly bad that season. He had only neglected them for a week at most before he was able to preen them properly.

The season after that was when his wings got really bad. They were so bad that he had shut himself inside for weeks without coming out. He had told his friends that it was just some nasty cold, and they had just given him soup and get well soon gifts.

Every now and again he would muster up the energy to start preening, but never really finished.

When he finally stepped out of his house, his wings had looked fine enough from the outside, and none of the village members questioned it. They just said that they were glad that his cold was gone.

Now it was the beginning of the season after, and he couldn't bring himself to stop welling in his thoughts and he couldn't take care of himself.

Only one person had noticed. One he had grown particularly fond of and close with. When he had asked about the wings, and why the avian looked a mess, he had just broken down.

He let his friend preen his wings, and they didn't hurt as much. He had been thorough and hadn't missed a single spec of dirt. It had taken a significantly long amount of time, but the friend had insisted that he was fine with it.

He loved his friend, more than he thought friends could love one another. He couldn't tell what his feelings were, but he didn't really mind it.

Grian was happy.

Grian was cared for.

And, most importantly, Grian's wings were clean.

[w0yxe]

I’ve realised that in the Life Series seasons where we get Scarian/Desert duo we don’t get Ethubs but when we get Ethubs we don’t get Scarian

I like to think that Double Life doesn’t count as Ethubs because of Boat Boys but you can definitely see it that way if you want to because they did ally in the end. If that’s the case then we get Desert Duo every other season

The watchers dont want us to get both so then by that logic, because we got Etho and Bdubs alliance this time, in the next season (Grian please make another season I am begging of you to), we’re going to get Desert Duo!

Knowing Grian I’d usually feel like he would do anything he can to prevent that from happening mainly due to him believing Scar will only weigh him down and because he would want to interact with more people rather than just the same alliances repeatedly. That was the reason “Secret Soulmates” spawned in the first place but he does care more about winning then the lore, so if Scar proves himself worthy then theres a chance

and Scar has.

The reason I think the alliance might work is because Grian keeps mentioning how “the one season he’s not with Scar, Scar’s actually doing good and getting kills”, not knowing its his curse causing Scar to do poorly in the first place. With how many times Grian brought it up I wouldn’t be surprised if he decided to go back to Scar

The only question is will Scar accept Grian?

[light-wave42]

Grian from a fic I’m writing

No promises it’ll get finished I’m bad at committing to fics lol

[angeart]

dance with me?

-- closeup and alts:

[happy-hermit]

Hey does anyone want to hear about my scarian fantasy/medieval-ish AU i'm planning on writing eventually? :)

[bluiex]

A Game of Pretend

I’ve decided to post my cheating DL Scarian angst cuuuz i prob won’t finish this LOL so at the end, let your imagination run wild in what happens(and mayhaps write the ending yourself :D) 

Enjoy!  word count: 1868 CW: Angst, hurt/comfort, cheating

AO3 LINK

===

The new death games Scar woke up into, was not what he expected. Romantic soulmates? PREPOSTEROUS! Those didn’t exist! So he played along, started out not thinking of finding his so called “soulmate” at all in this game. He found the allay and the Jellies! Those were his one true soulmates. Or Grian but what were the chances of him being soul bound with Scar?

Then Grian dropped a dripstone on his head and they both felt the pain, they both bled. 

Scar felt his heart soar. Okay maybe romantic soulmates were real. If Grian was his love here as well as back on Hermitcraft, Scar couldn’t not believe in soulmates now. 

Scar was so happy Grian was paired with him. It seemed at first Grian was too, but after a day or two Scar noticed Grian being standoffish. He wouldn’t allow the Jellie Panda’s inside their base so he was forced to make another one close by to house them. Grian wouldn’t return his soft touches, pulls his hand away whenever Scar tries to hold it or quickly pushes away from a hug with an excuse to go do something else. 

Now it was late some nights later, Scar sitting in his bed alone, across the bedroom from Grian’s own bed. That fact Scar tried to ignore, how Grian purposely made a separate bed, surely there was a logical reason he did that– like accidentally smothering the other while they slept! 

The smell of fresh bread wafts in from the kitchen, where Grian was baking. Scar wondered idly why Grian was up so late into the night baking of all things. Maybe it was for tomorrow, for them to share and go out to gather resources like they planned. With a soft sigh and hopeful smile, he scooted down into the covers and laid on his side, falling into a restless sleep. 

Scar didn’t see the bread anywhere in sight the next morning and Grian was already gone. 

A couple days later, that is when Scar stumbled upon Grian in the shadows of a setting sun close to somebody else. He slowed down his horse to a stop and jumped off it, grabbing the reins and silently walking closer to get a better look.

It was BigB. With Grian on his tippy toes his wings fluttering and arms around his neck, with BigB’s hands on his waist to stabilize him as they kissed. 

Scar felt his blood run cold and froze in place, gaping as the two pulled away from the kiss and giggled. 

“Woah what is this? Secret meetings in the dark?” 

Scar called out, hoping his voice didn’t waver and break like his heart was at the moment. 

The two quickly jumped apart, Grian sputtering nonsense awkwardly while BigB was looking anywhere but at Scar. 

“What? No. No! BigB was about to hit me- Isn’t that right?” Grian’s voice came out with a forced laugh, turning to look at BigB while taking a step back in a mock fighting stance.

Scar watched unamused as BigB lightly threw a punch at Grian. He felt the lightness of it.

With a hurt look to Grian when they caught eyes, Scar turned sharply away and marched toward Impulse’s and Bdubs’ home. When he was there he felt a couple tears fall and lamented out loud into the empty space that Grian was cheating on him. 

“Grian is cheating on me! With BigB of all people!” 

Scar heard a loud shushing noise from some corner of the house

“Quiet Scar!” he heard Bdubs whisper-yell, completely shrugging off what Scar just said. 

He sniffled and wiped the tears from his face. Right, now isn’t the time to be crying. 

Maybe it was a misunderstanding.

It was the next day when Scar grabbed Grian by the arm and dragged him away from a conversation with Etho and Joel. He ignored Grian’s shouting protests and smacks to his arm to let him go and brought them to a secluded spot before looking down at Grian.

“What was that with BigB last night?” Scar asks finally, he’d hoped he just imagined it or it was some secret plan Grian had. 

Grian stiffened at that looking at the ground. 

“What.. What did you see?” Grian asked softly, wrapping his arms around himself, wings tucking farther into his back. 

Scar felt his heart drop into the pit of his stomach, tears stinging his eyes. That pretty much told him all he needed to know. 

“How could you?” Scar asked, voice cracking. 

“Scar, listen. You know as much as I do how awful of an idea it is for us to be together here of all places.” Grian took on a defensive tone. 

Scar scoffed. 

“And what would possibly make you think that Grian?” Scar said getting offended, was their love not real? Was he not good enough anymore? 

“We’re connected, Scar. If you die, I die. If you take damage, I take damage.” Grian says as if it was the most obvious thing in the world and explains why he is cheating, looking up at Scar incredulously.

Then it hit Scar like a ton of bricks, he took a step back as if struck by someone. 

“So, I’m just a liability.. I’m not good enough for you?” 

Scar laughs bitterly, his hand covering his eyes.

Grian made a small noise at that, face scrunching up as if in pain, “That isn’t what I meant Scar.” he tried reaching out. 

Scar reared away, “Do not touch me.” 

Grian’s hand dropped instantly. 

“Scar listen, please, you are good enough! It’s just that–” 

Scar cuts him off, “Then why are you cheating on me with BigB?” he lets out a small helpless sound, feeling so betrayed. “I thought.. I thought you loved me. People in love don’t do this type of thing Grian. If this was some sorta plan to win the games, I could understand. But this, going behind my back? You’re my boyfriend here and back home, we’re supposed to work together right?”

Grian coward at that, mouth opening and closing a few times before remaining shut.

Scar stared at him, stared as Grian’s wings twitched and he bit at his lower lip nervously. 

Ah. I get it now.

“You never really loved me back did you? Not like I have all these years.” Scar spoke quietly, finally letting the tears well up and fall. 

“Scar.. We never really put terms on us.” Grian said quietly, looking toward the ground again.

“So you just led me on? I was just someone to warm your bed at night.” 

“No! Scar–” 

Grian began but Scar held his hand out as if to tell him to stop and shook his head, turned and walked away. 

Scar felt his heart break a little more that Grian didn’t chase or call after him. 

Hours later with the moon high above, Scar found himself outside of Pearl’s tower. He did end up going back to Red Velvet Keep, to maybe try and reconcile with Grian but he wasn't there. There wasn't any sign he went back to base after their talk. 

Scar can only assume he's off with BigB.

He hitches his horse to the nearest tree and climbs up the ladder, calling out to Pearl halfway up. The trap door opens up flooding the darkness with light as he climbs the rest of the way and hauls himself up into the small room. 

“What brings you here so late?” Pearl asks with a yawn, rubbing her eyes with a hand. 

Scar hums in response, sitting himself down on the ground under one of the windows, thuncking his head back into the wall, closing his eyes, trying and failing to will the tears away. 

“Scar, what happened?” Pearl quickly moved to kneel in front of Scar, reaching out to cup his cheek softly. 

“Grian he...” Scar breathed out, feeling the pain in his chest once more. The image of him kissing BigB ingrained into his mind. 

“He’s cheating on me.” 

Pearl breathed in sharply, pausing for a moment before pulling Scar into a hug. 

Scar broke down, letting out an anguished sob into Pearl's shoulder, wrapping his arms around her tightly. She ran her hands up and down his back soothingly as he cried out his hurt. Crying for a love that was never there. 

“I'm so sorry Scar.” Pearl murmurs, pulling back to cup Scar's face in both her hands. Wiping away the tears as they fell, she pulled him back into her, starting to rock back and forth. 

It took awhile but eventually Scar calmed down to just sniffles, eyes closed as he nuzzled into Pearl’s shoulder. He pulls away after a moment wiping at his face with a disgusted noise. 

“Sorry for sobbing all over you like that.” He mumbled looking down feeling a little embarrassed. 

“I feel a little silly now. How can he cheat on me when apparently we weren't really a thing to begin with?” Scar laughs, unhumourous, feeling stupid for giving Grian his whole heart.

Pearl grabs Scar again at that, making him look her in the eye. 

“My brother is wrong for even leading you on to think you two were ever a thing. What you're feeling is valid, Scar, just because he didn't love you back the same way doesn't mean you aren't allowed to hurt.” 

Scar fights back more tears at that, “Thanks Pearl.” He sighs, feeling exhausted.  “Can I stay here tonight? I'll sleep on the floor.” 

Pearl makes a noise, as if offended, “You will not be sleeping on the floor mister!” she gets up and jumps into bed again, making room for him and patting it. 

“Come now! In the bed!” 

Scar flusters but he's way too tired to fight back and chooses to comply. He gets up and drops into bed next to Pearl who immediately pulls him into her chest. Scar blush deepened as he wrapped his arms around her, nuzzling into her chest and closing his eyes. 

He falls into a deep sleep to the sound of Pearl humming. 

The next morning Scar woke up still holding Pearl, face pressed into her neck while her nose was buried in his hair. He clears his throat and slowly moves away, causing Pearl to wake up as well. 

“Good morning!” Pearl says cheerily, moving away to stretch. 

“Morning.. Thanks for letting me stay.” Scar says, letting out a yawn before sitting up and moving to stand. 

“You know.. You can stay here if you'd like. It does get lonely up in this tower.” Pearl says sitting up but staying in bed. 

Scar thinks for a moment. It'd probably be best to stay with Pearl. Team with her now.. Maybe.. 

Scar turns to look at Pearl, a fire in his eyes. She looks back with a quirked brow. 

“Help me get back at Grian. Pretend to be all lovey with me now.” Scar looks at her determined, wanting to make Grian jealous, maybe hurt him as much as he hurt Scar. 

Pearl froze before breaking out into laughter, “And they're calling me the crazy one?” She teases, no bite behind her tone. “Yeah of course, let's make Grian's life hell.”

[fireylesbianhell]

I see your haunted by taylor swift and I raise you ‘the way I loved you’ by taylor swift for double life where it’s grian singing about his awesome current partner big b but he just can’t get his mind off of scar

ohhhhhh. ohhh you undertsand me anon you understand.

[funkily]

seriously i love biggri so much i WISH they werent cheaters that would make my job so much easier