#also pls use he for pasha even before he knew

[wynn-ing]

i didnt even think abt pasha mb being trans, i was just like "has pasha ever been a normal kid? nah hes always been feral" if we want an in fiction reason mb kid pasha just cut her hair short herself with scissors cuz its always getting in the way. yeah that make sense - dw abt how hunt knew he was a boy before pasha not important ajjcnfnxbxb

also he got the long quiet/the hunted testosterone so u know that shit is strong (also the sideburns are more feathers than hair by the time hes an adult i think)

Hunted: -arrives in this kid's head- boy i need you to listen to me Pasha: !?!??!?!?!? wait. boy? Hunted: ? Are you not? Pasha: ......... I'm allowed to pick? Hunted: yes Pasha: oh. Okay I'm a boy then. I'm Pasha. Who are you? Hunted: I'll explain in a second but we need to go into the woods RIGHT NOW Pasha: they said not to go with strangers Hunted: okay. I'm not a stranger, I'm Hunted. I live in your head. go in the woods. Pasha: okay! I like the woods -cue feralification-

(he actually didn't go into the woods until he was a little bit older, bc Hunted wasn't sure his tiny baby hands were strong enough to start a fire or carry things yet. Second he managed to make a trap and catch a rabbit for the first time they were gone.) also SO true. Mannnn im jealous imagine having a voice in your head that gives you the hormones u want, even if only based on your belief that they're capable of doing so. Actually that's a good point. Their power changes and increases based on their own belief and the belief of their hosts, so I feel like if you have a Voice in your head, placebo effects work REALLY well on you compared to regular humans. ESPECIALLY if you have one of the body-affecting Voices like Hunted, Paranoid or Stubborn. You could literally transition off vitamin gummies if you genuinely believed they'd work.

Nobody in this cast is cishet except for Etienne's nice older coworker Neil.

[arcanaapprenticecatherine]

Julian X *Expecting* Apprentice

This was only suppost to be a short little blip but my heart poured out and it got long. My apologies, and pls enjoy!

Subject: Julian Ilya Devorak and MC expecting, morning sickness, Mazelinka to the rescue, family

Very SFW

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

It's only been a week or two since I told Julian that I'm expecting. One particular symptom has set in and I can't seem to shake off: morning sickness.

This morning was a really bad bout of morning sickness. Julian and I had just finished breakfast when the feeling hit me. I knew I wasn't going to keep that food down. I managed to get to a bucket before losing it, Julian hot on my heels. He must have seen my face before I bolted, he's holding my hair away from my face and rubbing my back.

"Okay, eggs are definitely out of the question," he starts. I shake my head, this is the fourth time I didn't keep my food down. Thank gods Mazelinka gave us the bucket.

"Maybe Mazelinka will know some foods I can eat until this blows over," I suggested to him.

"I'll be sure to ask her when I stop by," Julian continues to hold my hair and rub my back. I use the rag near by to wipe my face. Once he's cleaned me up, he pulls me to himself, my head on his chest listening to his heart beat as his chin rests on the top of my head. He strokes my hair back into place, all of which having a calming affect on me.

I know he's a doctor, trained in battle conditions for that matter, and is used to unsightly conditions. Yet I love how he gently cares for me in this state. Over a bucket emptying the contents of my meal, holding my hair back, rubbing my back and whispering calming things. And gentle cleansing my face of whatever mess. Each act just so full of care.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Sometime later that afternoon, as I'm tending to the store, a sort of knocking at the shop door convinces me to open the door.

To my surprise, Mazelinka waltzes in, arms full of prepared soups and potions and ingredients in baskets, Julian on her heels carrying more items.

"Heard you're having a hard time keepin it down in the mornings," Mazelinka cheerily says while settling her load on the counter. "Can't have you starving like that lanky boy of ours," she winks. It's strange to hear Mazelinka refer to Julian as "ours" though of course we're family, now.

Julian settles his load next to Mazelinka's. "I thought you were just going to give me some ingredients or recipes, not an entire week's worth of food," he says to Mazelinka, "though we do appreciate it."

Mazelinka waves her hand. "Nonsense! I'm happy to! Don't want her starvin', especially not now," she reassures him as she begins unpacking various items from her baskets. I recognize some of the herbs, with their magical and medicinal properties.

"Well it's not like they train you for expecting patients while on the battlefield," Julian mutters, but with no bitterness. The truth was that he was studying night and day from whatever sources he could on expecting, delivery, and caring for new borns. I couldn't be more proud. I make a mental note to praise him for it later.

I cut off what had the potential for Julian to spiral into his previous, toxic thought patterns.

"Oh Mazelinka, you didn't have to go to this much trouble!"

"I've been caring for these trouble makers since they were yea high," she vaguely approximates heights by moving her hands, "I'm happy to do this." She smiles up at my face, and then down at my 10 week baby belly bump. Nothing really visible, but the energy is present.

"Besides, I can't wait to meet the new trouble maker," she adds with a sincerity to her words.

She heats up a soup she had already prepared, and her magic has it's effects immediately as I scarf it down. The constant nausea subsided, grumpiness melts away. After I'm finished, I feel significantly better.

"I feel so much better already," I look up gleaming at Mazelinka.

"Glad to hear it! Where do you want all this stuff?"

The rest of the time while Julian is carrying the various items up to our shared space where the kitchenette is, Mazelinka and I begin writing down each ingredient, it's magical and medicinal powers, what to not mix with what, and recipes for whatever sife effect.

The rest of the afternoon and evening, Mazelinka retales the stories of Julian and Portia's (Ilya and Pasha's) childhood and growing up, Julian blushing but enjoying reminiscing about his youth. It dawns on me that I have no stories of my own youth to tell, I don't even remember my parents, since my memory only goes so far. Yet I enjoy the familiarity between Julian and Mazelinka, and now myself. The feeling of belonging and being at peace, perhaps what Julian also yearned for during his time running: family.

Mazelinka stays for dinner, I don't recognize the ingredients but it was warm, savory and filling. I feel... content.

Julian and I walk Mazelinka back to her place after. On our way back, Julian and are have our arms on each other: one arm over my shoulders, his cloak/jacket over me, the other holding my hand while my other arm latches around his waist. Comfortable, content, secure.

"You know, I don't remember my family, or my childhood," I begin to say to him, "But Mazelinka feels almost like a mother or close aunt, and Pasha a sister." I rest my head on his shoulder, "and of course I love you, too. It's like having a family of my own." He rests his head on top of mine, "Darling, you are family," he whispers softly as he nuzzles his face into the crown of my head.

[mrkrychek]

Brighter than the sun (Part 3)

Waited a little bit longer to update even though I’ve already written that part a while ago. So please let me now your thoughts of this.

Here you find the last part

Warning: some cuteness but also a lot of heart breaking

Word count: 2282

Part: 3/?

Translation: 

Доброе утро (Dobroye utro) - Good morning

Спасибо (Spasibo) - Thank you

Удачи (Udachi) - Good luck

Time passed by faster as you liked to. Today was your final exam and actually you weren't really ready for it. Mentally. You were scared to fail even though you knew that you know all the stuff you need to know. You anxiety made you unable to eat properly for two days now. And sleep was something you haven't had in a week. You felt like a mess and you probably also looked like one. But you needed to to you best because you wanted to be the best. You needed to pass this exam. But your friends were just like you. Everyone was a wrack. Everyone of your friends except for one.

Of course Pavel wasn't like anyone. He was just in his second year so he'd just have his normal finals. But he'd been your friend for almost two years now. And gosh he was such a good friend and always a sunshine in your life. You became really close pretty fast. There had been days when he followed you around like a little puppy and never stopped talking. Sometimes it had been hard to get along with him and his carelessness. But he got your heart.

You were on your way to the auditorium where the final exams were held by your own. Needed at least a little bit silence before it. But there was someone who wasn't aware of your wish. A certain Russian boy was shouting your name and running to you. A little smile came on your lips. Of course he would come here even if you'd told him not to do so.

“(Y/N)! Доброе утро (Dobroye utro)!“ He came to a stop right before you, a little bit out of  breath and his looks a little bit messy. But his smile was bright as the morning sun.

“Доброе утро (Dobroye utro), Pavel!” you said trying to hide the nervousness in your voice. “What are you doing here so early?”

“I'we vanted to see you before your exam. To vish you luck!” He took your hand and put something in there. As you took a look you saw a little matryoshka lying in your hand. “Zis is for you. Should giwe you luck!” You just stared at the wooden figure. Never have someone gave you anything as a lucky charm. And especially had no guy ever gave you anything. You just figured that you were a lucky girl to call Pavel your friend, probably even your best male friend. The girl who would end up marrying him would call herself the luckiest girl in universe.

“Thank you so much Pavel. Спасибо (Spasibo)! This is really cute! I guess now nothing can go wrong, doesn't it?” You started laughing a little bit and ran a hand through his hair to make it even messier. “Really..thank you kid. But I have to leave now otherwise I would be late. See you later!”

“Удачи (Udachi)“ With one last smile you continued your way to your exam. In your hand this little matryoshka, your lucky charm for everything now on.

-

Your exam had been not that bad as you thought it would be. You were confident that you would pass it. In just a few days you would know it for sure and hopefully you would also be assigned to a space ship and start off working. But you would still have to wait for this to happen and today – well today was the day you would get wasted pretty much and party with your friends and classmates and pretty much everyone who wanted to join.

“Damn where are my fucking earrings?” you heard your roommate shouting while she was walking through your little dorm. In the meanwhile you tried to put at least some make up on. You've never been much of a girly girl when it came to make up. Usually you wore non except maybe for some mascara and if you felt like it some lip gloss. But you felt like being some extra pretty tonight. Not like you needed make up for getting attention and being attractive. But hey why not?

“Have you been looking in the dresser next to my bed? Last time you put them there?”

“Nah I'm fine just found them...in the fridge....how did they get there?” You started laughing. Hannah was sometimes a little bit messy but you loved her. So after you finished your make up you came out of the bathroom and walked to your wardrobe and looked for something to ware.

“I would go for the blue dress! It looks good on you and it matches your eyes perfectly!” Hannah said while putting her earrings on.

“You're sure?” You took the dress out and hold it right in front of you and looked into the mirror. “And it makes me look sexy.”

“Keith will like it.” You had to grin because she was right he would like it very much.

“Then the blue one it is!” Quickly you put it on and looked at your best friend. “Ready to party and get drunk?”

“Definitely and maybe get me this cute guy from second year. You know this blonde one. The one who had every girl on campus.”

“Everyone except you and me obviously!” Both of you started laughing. “But go and get him. Don't want him.”

So you both got off your room and to the meeting point of your little party. You'd planned a little party on the biggest green area the campus had. Some classmates had agreed to get drinks, some others would got food and one guy was actually good in doing music so he'd agreed on being the DJ for the night. It sounded like it would be an awesome night and you were so ready to make it your night.

When you arrived there were already a lot cadets were already there and a few seemed already pretty drunk. Hannah dragged you immediately to both of your friends who were standing at the bar.

“Hey guys, we're here” she said and grabbed some drinks to gave you one of it. Both of you exed them before greeting the others properly. And you were right about Keith liking your dress.

Everyone around you was so relieved that the finals were over. They were all stressed out over the past weeks barely slept like you because no one wanted to fail the final finals. No one wanted to have another year – if it wasn't really necessary. But tonight no one cared if they'd made it or not. Tonight was about having fun and getting drunk and forget the last weeks.

You were already on your best way of being totally drunk but wasn't that the plan for tonight? So you got yourself and two of your classmates on the dance floor at some point and swayed you hips to the rhythm of the old Earth music – pretty old stuff from the 21st century but it was still good. Your eyes were closed while you let the music guide your body. There were no actual lyrics with this song but you felt the feeling that it was spreading with every beat. Man, the people of the 21st century knew how to make music an you bet that they had had the time of their lives at parties. It was when someone grabbed your hand that you snapped out of your trance. You looked down to your hand, wandering along the arm of the hand which hold yours, until you reached the face of it's owner an to looked into this bright face of your favorite Russian.

“Pavel!” you said with a smile on your face bending a little down to hug him. Did he just grew bigger since the last time you'd hugged him? He seemed smaller the last time. Kids are growing so fast so it could be possible. And actually you didn't care because you were already too drunk to do so. “Are you having fun here? But don't get too drunk...because you're actually not allowed to drink anything....you're still underaged....actually I don't know if it is okay for you being here at all...it's well over bedtime...” Okay when did you got so overprotective over him? Not like you were his mother or big sister. God, lucky you were neither of it.

“No, no I'm fine” he said and just smiled for a moment. Then his smile just died and he looked very seriously. You've never seen him that serious like now. No matter what he'd always been smiling. “I...uhm...do you hawe a moment...I need to talk to you...alone...” Okay that sounded very serious and you were very concerned about him so  you nodded and let him take you away from the speakers and the people to a bench far enough that you still could see the party but the noises weren't disturbing you. So you sat down next to him looked very worried.

“What's wrong Pasha?” You've never used this nickname for him before even though he'd always asked you to do so.

“I...I zink I'm...I'm in love viz...someone...” He was sitting right next to you but it was hard to understand him even the music was far away. But he spoke so quietly plus the alcohol made it a little bit harder for you to hear.

“Do I have to punch someone for you? Does she still have I boyfriend I need to get rid off for you? Did she hurt you and I need to punch her? Is she from your class? Or is she from another one? Oh gosh...or is it a guy? If you're gay I'm totally fine with it...you know my little brother's best friend is gay and I love this boy. And you're my best friend...I would never reject you because you are gay or so...” You took a deep breath. Sometimes when you were drunk you forgot to breath and talking quite too much.

“No...no I'm not gay...” he said, waving with his hands but still not looking at you. And whether it was the alcohol or your really saw his hands shaking a little bit. You took a closer look at him. He looked sad and confused and desperate. Never have you seen him like that. His feelings for her had to be really deep already if they made him look like that.

“Hey...okay...what's wrong, Pasha? Being in love should make you happy not sad...” Now he took a deep breath or maybe too an he slowly turned his head to look at you. You had to swallow hard when he looked you in the eyes. The sprinkle which was usually always there was gone and all you could see was the desperation in them. “Did she...rejected you?” He shook his head but kept his eyes looked to yours. “What's the matter then? Have you already told her about your feelings? No you didn't right? And that's the matter, isn't it?” It was like you and him switched places because usually it was him talking so much and you the one who barely speaks.

“No...no I hawen't...because...I'm afraid...”

“Afraid of what?” You saw him swallowing hard and taking a deeper breath than before. And now you were sure that he was shaking. His whole body was shaking as he tried to get himself together to find courage to speak of his mind.

“I'm afraid of....losing her...because she is...my best friend....” This was when it hit you right into your stomach. Now it was your breath that was missing. Anxiety took away you breath, made you feel sick all of sudden. Everything around you began to spin around and the alcohol was definitely not the only reason for it. You knew that Pavel just had one friend here on campus, one truly friend, his best friend and it was you. He was in love with you and you haven't seen it. How long did you already lived with it? How long did he already planned to tell you but found never the right moment?

You nearly jumped off the bench. A little bit too fast because everything around you started to spin around even more but you kept it together. Then you took a few steps backwards, staring at this little boy and seeing his little heart breaking into pieces.

“I'm so-sorry....I...I can't....” You immediately turned around and started running. You nearly fell sometimes but you kept yourself on your feet. Tears forced their way up into your eyes but you swallowed them away. No you wouldn't cry  now. Not because you broke the heart of your best friend just because he fell in love with you.

And then you nearly fell on the ground as you stumbled over a bigger stone you haven't seen. But someone grabbed you in a firm grip and kept you just centimeters away from ground. You were lifted up again on your feet. The person looked at you worried while asking you if you were alright. No of course you were not but you wouldn't say that out loud. Your heart hurt because you hurt someone else you really liked. And you wanted to forget this pain. So either you would get even more drunk and risk to wake up in hospital because of alcohol poisoning or you would just let yourself get fucked so hard that you would forget everything. And the person in front of you seemed like the right person to do so. So your decision was made.