#also oliver... hes such a nuisance..... you have to tell him to behave.

[go6jo]

rin will hastily tag along with you when you tell him you’re shopping for swimwear that afternoon and while you’re skimming through the racks of clothing you loose sight of him for a bit and you think he must have decided to sit down to let you wander around freely but then he returns with a pile of all different kinds of bathing suits in his hands telling you a bit bashfully that he thought those would look good on you. (you’re a little surprised when you notice they’re all the skimpiest two pieces you’ve ever seen btw… it swells your ego that he wants to see you wearing those, that he wants to show you off… also i think hes particularly keen on those bikinis that you have to tie together. he absolutely loves it when you ask him to help you tie the back of your top also thinks they’re a bit risqué and it makes him a little crazy… is constantly playing with the strings of your bottoms that look so good digging into your thighs…) goes inside the fitting room with you to help you tie the bikini tops and kisses your shoulder before standing behind you with his hands on your waist and you’re trying very hard to suppress a smuggish smile from showing because he’s staring so intensily and he’s so tense, his hands are digging at your waist and it’s kinda amusing “so?”

“look so fucking good.” it's so characteristically blunt and you chuckle softly because he’s said that about all the bikini sets you’ve tried on so far. and he means it. you tell him to help you pick one but he's sooo far gone and he feels a little guilty because he's not being much of a help but he's only thinking about hurrying back home where you'll model your new purchase for him like you always do (a way to show him your gratitude, you say, for spending his money on you yet again. he thinks it’s a fair exchange.) he'll close his eyes as per your request as you walk out of the en-suite bathroom of your shared room - doesn't matter he bought it for you, that he's seen you in it and that he's been thinking of you in it ever since. he's thinking of beckoning you closer to him sitting in bed and kissing your exposed tummy. you'll smile, knowingly, because you know how he gets, because you’re all too aware of what he wants yet is too reluctant to put into words, when he begins to play with the strings of your bottoms, his face still buried in the plush of your stomach - a bit too embarrassed to let you in on his desire, scared that it is too flagrant on his features. he feels his greed might be inadequate. you'll smile and guide his hands to your waist, it's okay, you can touch me, and he will trail his hands up your spine and strip you slowly, starting at the knot on your back, followed by the knot on your neck and then the ones on each side of your hips...

he's rushing out of the fitting room with the pile of different bikini sets you couldnt choose from and goes straight to the register to pay for all three of them despite your protests that three new sets is excessive and completely unecessary.

[whatdoesshedotothem]

Tuesday 10 April 1838: SH:7/ML/E/21/0074

7 25

12 10

finish morning – high wind – F41° at 8 40 – somehow I think more of A- than she deserves I wish I was well rid of her – Looking into Backwell and De la Beche (Geology) till 9 – then breakfast and sat downstairs talking till 10 – soon afterwards sat down at my desk and wrote 3pp. and under seal (of ½ sheet) to Lady S. de R- and wrote over again (to date my letter today) what I wrote to Lady S- on Sunday writing it now in 4pp. of ½ sheet and 1 p. of envelope – then wrote 4pp. (letter paper) to Lady V.C- chitchat to Lady S- and thanks for her letter and congratulations on the birth of the little Sibbella – delighted and exulting to have waited till practice has made perfect that my Sibbella may not be behindhand with the little people her predecessors – Lady S- writes ‘tho a daughter she is the finest child she has’ – offer to put myself at Lady S-‘s disposal for 2 or 3 weeks anytime after the end of this month – shall want only my maid – will send my carriage to the coach maker to have what done may be necessary for a longer journey and will send my manservant home – wrote the substance of all this to Lady S. de R- adding that a very unexpected circumstance but not  a windfall had upset my plans and that I now thought I should not be able to get quite off before near or after Xmas – wrote congratulations to Lady V.C- hope she did not feel the effects of her fall (just before her confinement) beyond the moment – mention having purchased the 2 books she recommended (Combe and Dr. Birgham) ‘much for us all to profit by, especially your mothers, whose olive-branches spring up, and thrive so pleasurably’ – ‘Surely you will condole with me on my being still here – I had arranged a plan of northern tour, and fixed the day for being in London; but a very unexpected circumstance upset my schemes once more; and I am waiting as patiently as I can – But I shall never go far without telling you – at this moment, I fear I cannot be absent for long together of some months to come – nous verrons – but I think I could manage a short while, and have just written to dear Lady Stuart, and offered to put myself at her disposal for 2 or 3 weeks’ then mention Breadalbanes’ asking my subscription to Mr. Robertsons’ work of travels and her ‘alluding with regret to his having published some foolish history of the Mclean family – of this I, of course, took no notice, as I really knew nothing about it – but considered Breadalbane’s request a sufficient reason for my taking two copies – she told me, too, of York being thought of as a place of residence for the Hugh Macleans, and that she herself, and the premier-lit girls were to spend the summer at her cottage, and talked of living together – why York for the Hugh Macleans? Is any part of England particularly cheap? Give a kiss for me to my little Sibbella, and to little Louisa, too, who behaved so beautifully at Leamington, and believe me always affectionately yours A. Lister’ – at 1 40 had just written so far of today and copied my letter to Lady S. de R- - then A- came to me all in the dolefuls about a handkerchief frill tried to get her right she had been very hardly used twice by me and now by her aunt  never thought of going to Cliff hill as she had done   could not bear    when she came here thought of going abroad and when I said I had offered her to go away to any friends or do anything I could she said she did not like to go with my servants  I said she had the whole management    I said I had nobody to advise with might I write to her sister  no it would be very hard  well said if I could but have my own way I should not fear  indeed but she did not like to be an automation I was very calm and quiet and said by and by she must forgive me if I did not forget the word automation I would not break her heart nor use her hardly nor make her an automaton  these things could be easily settled but every sensible kept up appearances as well as they could – she sat all the while on my knee  I begrudged the time and said I must seal my letters and go out she had before declined reading them she now said as she had waited so long she might as well read them her curiosity got the bette[r]  she made no remark nor did I – I hope I shall be rid of her by and by had I not be better remain a little with Lady Stuart if I can with any comfort? – at least I had best not return to A- sealed my letters (A- with me till 2 40) and wrote the last 17 lines till 3 – then in about ¾ hour wrote 3 pp. and ends to M- ‘Shibden hall. Tuesday 10  April 1838. It pothers me, my dearest Mary, to see amid my

SH:7/ML/E/21/0075

heap of unanswered letters one from you received Tuesday 27 February’ six weeks ago – not long compared with the term of my delinquencies to many other people, but longer than my custom is to youwards [towards you]– I let you take your own time, of late generally eked out to many weeks; but it is never my intention to let my pen be dilatorily to you, and I think it seldom is so, in fact – one reason of my waiting, I meant my date to have been from elsewhere – all was arranged and the day fixed for our begin off, when a very unexpected circumstance upset all; and here we are, and are likely to be off, at this moment, I cannot guess how much longer – I do not pretend to enter into any sort of explanation on paper – it would be too tiresome to say, or, rather to write, more than that poor Mrs. Walker imagines herself within some short while of that bourne from which no traveller returns; and we are lookers on – if you chance to come this way, you will, of course, come and see us – if not, you will take it for granted, as I do, that ‘all things work together for good’ ..... glad to hear so good an account of her mother no wonder at M-‘s bad cold..... ‘when is Lawton to be finished? your comfort is at stake; and therefore I am anxious for the completion – as far as Shibden is concerned, I have got over all impatience – my care about the finishing is reduced is reduced to very comfortable dimensions – I am so engrossed with other things, I have little time for musing about my house – but, I do assure you, I seriously meditate making my escape by and by – your account of Mr. Lawton is so excellent, it seems as if he, like many others who have been ailing for many years, may survive many of the stronger and junior ones of our day – what you allude to, may, with his own common care, be of little nuisance or danger – I cannot help hoping you might slip away for 5 or 6 weeks well enough, if such should be recommended by your own inclination, and more especially by your medical advisers – I have not time to run into the minutiae of Rhine expense – my rough calculation was 25fr. ie. one pound English sterling per day – taking very little luggage – no servant (you and Mrs. M- would not want one) and travelling by steam – the fares are very moderate – I dare not say I myself ever travelled exactly at this rate; but I know that it has been done – there is no difficulty or disparagement in dining for 3fr. having breakfast and supper for 3fr. and bed for 2fr. = 8fr. and one fr. for the servants will suffice, leaving 16fr. out of the 25fr. for steaming and etc. quite enough si les voyageurs le veulent – It is travelling en milord that is expensive – 4 horses and 2 postboys not only entail your own expense but double everything else’ – as M- regrets gently leaving Leamington ‘I abate my own sorrow – I still however wish you well backed out of all your scholastic troubles’ – conclude she is still at Moreton – no doubt I should much approve all your alterations – your description vivâ voce would be more agreeable than any other means of bringing them before me, except in situ – I hope the prince with a long name has along enough purse’........who has just married Mr. W. Crewes’ cousin – ‘Perhaps  you are busier than I – it may be so – but it does not take long to write me enough to inform me how you are, and where you are – However, I am always satisfied – come what may, there ought to be a never failing spring of happiness within us all – as touching those I am interested about, I always believe all right, till I am credibly informed to the contrary – I anticipate no [disagrees] – I dream but little – yet the little is carefully selected from what is pleasantest – I never saw any good in moody musings – God bless you Mary! you or your letters will find me here, and always faithfully and affectionately yours AL’ – at 4 10 had just written the last line of p. 137, the whole of the last p. and so far of this – then sealed my letter to ‘Mrs. Lawton hall, Lawton, Cheshire’ and left also ready for the bad tonight my letter to ‘the honourable Lady Stuart Whitehall’ and to ‘The Lady Stuart de Rothesay undercover to ‘Lord Stuart de Rothesay, Carlton terrace, London’ and my letter to ‘The Lady Vere Cameron Achnacarry Fort William Invernesshire’ went out at 4 20 – a few minutes with Robert Mann + 5 levelling at the meer in the morning and in the afternoon in the garden George Naylors’ horses carting clay from the flower garden to the great sycamore, and my own cart bringing clay from the Laundry road side to cover over the turret passage – the 2 teams carts in the morning bringing necessary stuff from Hx- on to the land – then to Listerwick pit walked there with Joseph Mann – told him the engine would be a £700 business – I had no choice – I must either let the colliery or settle about it someway – then to John Oates – laid up with an inflammation in his right hand and about the wrist – Mr. Swallow came and I went out while he was there – then returned and was an hour at John’s told him about the engine – he still inclines to an endless chain – and thinks the engine will cost little more working their ginning with horses would have done for 2 horses could hardly have done the work – said what I had said to Holt about knowing what the coal would make me clean per acre – said I only wanted £150 per acre for the coal (very fair said John) and 10pc. on outlay – but this would be near £6000 – say £5500 at the least – say 3 acres per annum £450 + £550 = £1000 – John thought it could not clean so much – but said he thought it really would clear me £300 per acre - .:. if 4 acres – could be sold per annum it would pay – there will be a deal of straight work but this will leave something – In fact, John says, I must go on now – and only wait a little and the Dove house coal will be bought reasonably and then I can go on without incurring any more expense in looses as long as I live – John says he thinks we can sell 3 acres if the coal is as good as that got at [Ship] Inn pit, the quality will sell – none like it hereabouts – well! I must go on, and if I can weather out [of] the storm a little longer perhaps I shall do pretty well at last – I think I can manage – at all rates, I will not despair – came in at 6 ¾ - gave A- my letter to M- to read – went into the cellar – 1 port 1 marsala – dinner at 7 10 – A- poorly – could not see Joseph Mann who came at 8 about Landymere – went to bed at 8 ½ - I made my own coffee and sat reading

SH:7/ML/E/21/0076

the h-x Guardian till 10 ½ - then 5 minutes in the west tower – the cupboard above the stairs ceiling put up – then wrote the last 25 lines till now 10 55 pm at which hour F50° finish afternoon and evening dampish in the morning with highish wind – and whistling wind tonight – I looked very grave at dinner A- had a headache temper-sick so I let her go off to bed and have taken no notice  I must be rid of her be it as it may hear bad temper vulgar pride and littleness of mind   would be an insupportable drag upon me for the rest of my life – surely I shall get some way I dread the loneliness most but heaven will provide me even against this in some way  had A- been barely tolerable I could have go ton perhaps I am obliged to her aunt for making me this opportunity of getting off does A- suspect my thought of not returning to her?  cunning and suspicious as she is does she think that I hope not to trouble her long? – had Booth tonight till near 7 – told him JO. was still for the endless chair – that Garforth was to send plans of with and without; and we would all meet at John Oates’s at 3pm on Friday instead of here – has A- thought much of losing the forget-me-not ring I gave her? then read Bakewells’ geology for 10 minutes till 11 35