#also my s/o told me earlier this summer that i make stuff up bc i sometimes feel well enough to do something
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#first of all i want to say that you have to skip this bc i' m just rambling#so i havent eaten for a week bc i feel disgusting doing so#if i want to talk about it with my parents they say that i'm making problems bc im bored and basically they dont want to talk with me#my brother says he wont talk to me anymore because he doesn't like ky high picved voice and that i should lower it#i cant talk to my friends bc it feels like i an using them to bemy#be my* therapists and thats very shitty of me#also my s/o told me earlier this summer that i make stuff up bc i sometimes feel well enough to do something#just like my family that says by being over 18 i shouldn't act like i am the center of attention#i cant talk to my therapist bc my next visit is in october and she always calls me childish for not saying that everythings ok#im so sorry i dont wany to#dont want to invalidate others feelings and experiences#i just want to stop existing#i am a bad person#im so sorry#i want to never wake up again#but i cant talk to anyone i know about it#i will nrver feel better just let me die
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