#also mobile why am I even awake

[bloodyjuls-blog]

Im gonna fight for both of us

P4

So here we go with part 4, sorry it takes me too long but I'm working and hate work haha...

When Alexia entered the hospital she had no idea what she would find there, in one hand, she could find y/n awake but with some tiny injuries (it was what she wished) but what she found was a nurse informing her that they needed someone to give consent to perform an emergency surgery because y/n's accident is a serious life threatening emergency and Alexia knew well, the only person who could do that was your sister, she had the obligation to call her and inform her, she didn't bother to call your parents because she knew that you were not the most beloved daughter in that family, moreover, she knew that they wouldn't even miss you if you died, because she heard many conversations with them in which they clearly told you that you were a failure.

While Lilah, your sister, gave the authorization over the phone, the doctors explained to Alexia what had happened to y/n. First, when they arrived at the hospital y/n went into cardiac arrest due to the impact, then doing a general sweep they found cervical and spinal injuries that compromise her mobility, hence the emergency surgery. What worries them the most is the injury of her brain, apparently it has a severe inflammation and they are concerned that when she wakes up (if she does) she will have compromised her cognitive functions such as speaking, moving, remembering things, most likely she will have memory loss.

When her sister arrived at the hospital she was furious, how was it possible that y/n was drinking again and doing these things as irresponsible. Alexia got angry and said a few things to her.

"Look, I don't think that looking for blames is the solution, what I think is that we should support each other without blaming in favor of y/n not dying, because I swear that if she dies I am going with her, you don't understand the things she was going through, and being honest neither did I, and if looking for blames then blame me because I was the one insisting" Alexia said. "Insist on what, what did you say Alexia" says y/n's sister "I insisted so much on the idea of starting a family, having children, that without those things I couldn't continue with her, that all this time was lost, but I swear it's not like that, it hurts me a lot to know that probably the only thing she heard from me was that while she's always being the loveliest person she is told me that for her the family was me and she didn't need children while she was with me, you don't know how much I regret it." Says Alexia crying and Lilah just approached and hugged her. At the end of the day their relationship is very close. "Ale calm down a little and come let's sit down, I think I understand why y/n is like this with the family thing and maybe when y/n wakes up it will kill me because it's something she didn't want you to know" lilah says calmly. They settled into the waiting room chairs.

"Since she was very little, my sister has always been the black sheep, the daughter that nobody wanted, the girl that when she had the opportunity to left home she did and never came back, you know Alexia when my sister left I was very sad but as an older sister I always saw the mistreatment and never said anything, she stopped going to so many events, so many Christmas reunions, so many birthdays or things like that because she simply knew that they didn't want her, they didn't show it love of support, the only thing that accompanied her in her gray days and well not so gray, was her bottle of whiskey, what can you ask from a teenager who has social pressure for what she does and no support or family that can tuck her in and tell her that everything will be okay" says the sister between soft tears. "I didn't know that, I thought that since she was also getting along with you..." Ale said remembering the phone calls from your parents.

"Of course Ale, you more than anyone knows that she is not one of those people who scream her problems and plead for help, she didn't want you to see her as something weird, that's why she gets along so well with your family, she found love in you, to feel loved, tucked in by someone, valued, no matter what and luckily your family is just like you, if you see the relationship my parents have with me and have with her you would surely get angry because you and I know what is y/n and how important it is to have her in our lives, Ale I'm not going to lie to you, a while ago I also thought that my sister wanted to be a mother because you know mate, look at how she treats the children, they have a very special relationship, very nice, she is a pure soul, but all her life she has seen examples of how not to be parents, how my mother ignored her and her things, Alexia the fact that my parents are not here is not new, when that 17 year old girl in her peak career broke her cruciate ligament, nobody was there for her, not even to give her a bottle of water, and because of that and more things is that y/n is super strong and every thing she sets in her mind to do she achieves it. For many years it was just her against the world and she has lived many blows without saying a word, so if she gets out of here you will understand that it will be very difficult, she will need a lot of support because according to what I have been told, her injuries are serious, probably the only thing that keeps her alive is football and she won't can do that anymore" says Lilah calmer. "I swear Lilah when y/n gets out of here things will be different, I would have liked to have this same talk but with her and avoid this bump in our road but life gives some people a lot and others very little, I swear I will be in her way as long as she lets me, that girl deserves nothing but good things and I believe that all the people she has given her love have let her down in a certain way, but just like you, I also want to do well, did you know that at home I have the ring to propose to her? I swear that without it I can't live" says Alexia more calm and confident. "I'm glad to hear that Ale, you two do each other good, please don't lose that, you're all would be miserable for life and that's not what you're all deserve." Lilah said as she gave Alexia a hug.

Hours later

"Relatives of y/n y/l" says the receptionist on the OR floor. "We are" say Lilah and Alexia at the same time. "The doctor is cleaning up but he's on his way here to report his relative" says the girl stoically. "Thank you very much" they both say in unison.

Once in the study room with the doctor....

"Well, I must say that it was a very complicated surgery because we found internal injuries that we couldn't see in the x-ray and that compromised her health, I am not lying when I say that she went into cardiac arrest at least three times and that worries us a lot because it means that her heart is weak. About her cervical injuries I am afraid that only when she wakes up we will be able to know if she has sensitivity in her legs and if she will be able to walk again, but I must admit that because of the blows her spinal cord has been affected, I want to be very realistic with you, if we manage to have a satisfactory recovery it will be very difficult for her to return to her profession, because the high impact can cause definitive injuries, now my colleagues are monitoring her brain signals because in the resonance we saw very few but we can guarantee that there is no brain death, but any sequels will be determined once she wakes up, at the moment she is not in coma but she was not awake either, we have implemented a method of sedation a little strong but I insist she is not in coma, so now later when the entrance to her relatives is authorized you're all can talk to her, in this state she can listen hope so. Of course, the view that you are going to find is very strong, because she is connected to many tubes and intravenous lines, also her external injuries are a little strong and her foot has an external fixator because there was a fracture of the tibia and fibula". Says the doctor super calm but forceful.

"thank you very much doctor, the fact that she is still alive is because of your effort, let's hope that the evolution is positive, sure it is" says Lilah calm and Alexia super scared because she doesn't understand anything. "Well Ale, y/n is not well and there are strong changes coming in her life and the only thing we have left to do is be by her side to make it as bearable as possible, I am not so much worried about her physical injuries but mental then we must make sure that when she gets out of here she gets psychological attention, and have faith that she will get out of this because she is a super strong person, she always has been and this will be just a very fat bump for her, are you ready to see her" Lilah says optimistic. "I don't know, I just know that if I will always be even if she doesn't want me to, it will be hard for me to see her like this but that's okay" Alexia says forcefully. Alexia's phone starts ringing, it's Ana and Leah on joint call.

"Hi girls."

"Hi Alexia, what happened to y/n, did you find her" says Ana worried.

"Girls, y/n was involved in an accident and it's serious" says Alexia with her voice cracking remembering the anguish experienced a few hours ago.

"How???? What do you mean accident and serious????, my goodness" says Leah in dismay.

"Yes girls, apparently her car overturned at high speed on Tibidabo and her injuries are serious, she probably won't be able to play football anymore" "if you want to come I'm sure y/n would really appreciate it" says Ale sadly.

"I'm already looking at flights to Barcelona, I just can't believe it, what a downer girls, I'm so sad" says Leah in tears.

"Ale tells me which hospital you are, I'm on my way" says Ana in a hurry.

"We are in the one near Tibidabo" "now I'm sending you the location, I'm going to hang up, I'm going to go in to see my baby" and Alexia hung up.

Before entering the room Alexia calls the team managers to discuss what happened and they tell her not to worry that everything is going to be fine and that she can take all the time in the world to be with y/n.

Lilah takes Alexia's hand and asks her if she is ready to go in to which Ale nods not so sure....

When they enter the first thing they see is y/n lying on the bed with many tubes everywhere, one coming out of her mouth, IV in her arms, one in her leg and the fixator in her ankle adding the bandage on her head (because nothing can be seen from her spine but that's where her surgery was) a tube coming out of her side, Alexia's heart breaks in little pieces to see her like this, the love of her life lying on a bed fighting for her life....

"Ale, talk to her and hold her hand, so she could feel you are here, with her, while I go make some calls" "Ok" alexia says.

"Hello my love, I know that the last time I spoke to you I didn't say very nice things but I want you to know that they're not true, I was very angry with you, it is that you are a stubborn honey, why don't you tell me your things, my life you are going to be very well. You are going to recover and although everything will be very different I am going to be with your sister and you all the way, you are going to be well, healthy, strong and laughing at life as always, I am sad to see you like this, I don't like to see that you are having a bad time, I only ask you to fight and stay here with me, don't go without me, I love you so much, all the girls are worried, even Leah is coming from London later and Ana is on her way, I'm sure that when they see me they will want to tear my head off for being stubborn, and you should know that I don't mind not having children but as long as I have you, nothing happens. .. We will buy the little house on the beach that we want so much and we will be very happy my love, I cannot do without you, you are my life, you have always been my life, I love you, very much and I will not leave here and go home without you. I love you too much, you can't imagine how much..." Alexia says through tears as she comes over and gives you a little kiss on your uninjured cheek. She arranges the chair next to you and doesn't let go of your hand, trying to give you some human warmth in that cold room. And she falls asleep for a while to the sound of the monitors lulling her to sleep.

[imsorrythatimweird101-blog]

Do you want to shift? Here's the answer

Gateway tapes. GATEWAY TAPES, G A T E W A Y T A P E S. hello, my name is Athena and I help people to shift. No, I haven't successfully shifted.

"WhY aRe YoU tAlKinG iF yOu HaVenT ShIfTed YeT. I WaNt REaL ExPeRt ThAt CaN"

Okay, to give you some background. I have astral projected many times. Means I'm able to leave my body. Now, why I haven't because I am mastering the basic before I start doing anything crazy but if I really REALLY wanted to, I can. Now to start the post, gateway tapes will be your best friend and lover. The whole point of shifting is getting yourself into a void state. The gateway tapes do that. It basically trains your body to get into void state to manifest, solve problems or whatever your intention is. Not only that, it shuts off the side of your brain and helps you do it in command. You have to enter **F10**. Then you can do whatever. Now before you start running with it. do not and I mean DO NOT. Rush through it. You can't train yourself if your just rushing through it like crazy because you want shift. These options are important because you will be like **ME**. and having go fucking back again and again because you decide to take your training wheels off too early and you have nowhere to go.

Okay, so your wondering. How do I start?

Well you go through each mediation *MORE THEN ONCE* until you master each one. Simple, now tapes are long and can be boring. I won't denied it but if your still trying shift from xyz. This will be easy for you

Tips/recommend:

Do tapes once in morning or night. But I really recommend to do them at night and btb (back to bed). I had my most successful when doing btb

Do each tape at least 3 times before moving on or keep doing them until you feel like your ready to move on. It's practice, I have done body asleep and mind awake for good week or 2. Now I can do that on command. Because I practice. Last time, when I rush. I couldn't even do anything. So be patient and practice

Be consistent. I recommend everyday. If you don't everyday then maybe every other day.

[gateway tapes ](https://drive.google.com/drive/u/0/mobile/folders/1vZJg5oJvfYVwWryJh05pfkZTV0cnd026)

Read the Manuel to get more deep into it but also please just do wave 1. You can advance if you want but it gets more extreme and complicated. Can be wonderful but still if your not used to out body experience

If your interested in my journey here's some links to my account (I want fans 😔✊)

Tiktok: @athenashiftsto

[insta](https://www.instagram.com/imsorrythatimweird?igsh=NGVhN2U2NjQ0Yg==)

[autism-autobot]

LMK Angst Fic Part 5

Author's note: I think there need to be more platonic and friendship cuddling in media and in the world, so here we are. (Definitely not touch starved nope not me!)

Part 4:

It was around three in the morning in the celestial realm. Nezha had become accustomed to sleeping beside Sun Wukong every night and had even begun to enjoy it despite the reason why they started doing it. He had always thought of Wukong as a good friend and companion, which he didn't have very many of thanks to his workaholic attitude. Him and Wukong had even become quite comfortable with each other.

Nezha was aroace and Wukong still considered himself spoken for since his previous marriage had ended in death and not divorce. So it was as platonic as could be. However, they were both touch-starved and emotionally neglected as children, so there's that.

Wukong and Nezha had grown used to falling asleep snuggled up next to each other, with limbs tangled in weird form around each other. But neither of them were exactly still while they slept, so Nezha wasn't immediately concerned when he couldn't feel Wukong next to him when he flopped his arm around beside him to try and find the monkey he'd grown so close to.

Until he heard the whimpering.

That can't be good.

Nezha bolted upright in the bed. He searched the dark room for his friend's ginger-colored fur. He found it at the edge of the bed.

After clambering over to Wukong's side he gently and quietly asked:

Nezha: Wukong, are you awake? What's the matter?

SWK: *sobbing* I-it's my head! It's hurting! It hurts so bad! Please-

Nezha: Shhhhh, Wukong. It's alright. I'm here, it's okay. You'll be okay.

Nezha had become accustomed to Wukong's post-circlet migraines and various other symptoms of Wukong's traumas. It seemed as though even after Wukong had learned to cope with the physical damage done to him, his body had not, and was therefore having it's own posttraumatic episodes.

Nezha had found ways to sooth him luckily.

Nezha laid Wukong in his original position on his side of their shared bed and put an ice pack on his forehead. He then lit some incense and lightly wafted the fumes in Wukong's direction so he could smell it. That was more to soothe the monkey's panic than anything.

After laying back down beside Wukong, Nezha wrapped an arm around his chest.

Nezha: Are you comfortable enough?

SWK: I think so.....*gasps*

Nezha: Wukong what-

SWK: Hot flash. Don't worry, it's already over. Gosh, that felt bad.

Nezha: It will be alright my friend. I am here.

SWK: Thank you. For everything.

Nezha: No problem, I quite enjoy your company. I just wish you weren't in pain as often as you are.

SWK: You and me both.

~~~

They slept for a few more hours before getting up. Sun Wukong tended to be very weak during and after a migraine, as was the design of the circlet he once wore. Nezha helped him to the downstairs living room and set him up on the couch.

SWK: Ow.

Nezha: Sorry.

SWK: Nah, it's fine. I should be the one saying sorry to you.

Nezha: Whatever do you mean by that?

SWK: You're always having to help me out with stuff and getting me out of trouble.

Nezha: That is only half true. Besides, I do not mind taking care of you.

SWK: But don't you think of me as weak for needing help like this?

Nezha: No, not really. If I did, however, I'd be the world's biggest hypocrite.

SWK: What? How so?

Nezha went into the adjacent closet and pulled out a wheelchair, it was the active kind too, unlike the bulky ones you'd find in the hospital.

Nezha: I haven't told you this before, I probably should've by now but, I guess I share similar insecurities.

Nezha: I am disabled. I'm an ambulatory wheelchair user, meaning I can walk about easily at times, while others I cannot.

Nezha: That is also why I have my fire wheels, sash, and staff. They are mobility devices. Albeit they are a bit atypical.

SWK: Cool!

Nezha: Really? You think they're cool?

SWK: Well, yeah! I think that type of stuff is pretty interesting. I get why you wouldn't exactly want to show it off though.

Nezha: Thank you. Perhaps if you are ever needing some help after a migraine or other health complication, you can use one of my many wheelchairs! I hardly use most of them anymore, it's nice to have backups. Just in case.

SWK: Thanks for the offer. Maybe I'll give one a spin after I feel a little bit better. I still feel like my head will explode if I sit up.

Nezha: Alright then. I'll park this one next to you so you can have an easy transition when you are ready.

SWK: Thanks again.

Nezha: You are quite welcome.

Part 6:

Masterpost

[obsolescent]

Kinktober Day 5

Pairing: Leon S. Kennedy x Reader

Prompt: Familiar scent

Author’s Note: Is this inspired partly by the fact that I got Leon’s perfume the other day? Perhaps, but I am big on smell in my own life and love smelling things, especially if it’s something dear to me so I was eager to do this prompt all around hehe. Also so sorry I am lagging on these, but I hope you enjoy!

Content Warnings: No gendered language for reader, trans!Leon, masturbation, oral sex, domestic bliss.

Kinktober Masterlist

“Honey?” Leon calls out, entering the house and shutting the door behind him. When the only reply he receives is his voice echoing back to him in the empty home, he frowns. Hoping to have surprised you, he expected you to be home around this time. It was 6:45 in the evening, past the time you left work for the day. He let out a disappointed sigh, removing his dirtied boots before trudging to the bathroom to remove the rest of his ruined clothing.

He had just gotten back from another arduous mission, the ones that always make him want to hold you closer and never let you leave the house again. Knowing that it’s just not feasible to ask of you or even consider, he shakes his head at those thoughts, not wanting to lose himself in that type of thinking. He lets out a groan as he bends down to remove his socks, before moving to turn the shower on.

He rushes through, scrubbing the grime off of his body to the best of his ability at the moment, having sustained some serious bruising on his side, it would be a challenge for a regular person to even stand after the things Leon went through, thankfully it just limits some of his mobility for the time being. Turning the faucet off and stepping out, he quickly towels off before heading to your bedroom, not bothering to put on any clothing, sleep–and you–the only thing occupying his mind currently. 

He collapses onto the bed, rolling to your side, crawling into the sheets and burying his face into your pillow. He inhales deeply, your scent relaxing him further, yet he remains annoyingly awake. He groans, grabbing your pillow and bringing it into his embrace, he lays on his back while staring at the ceiling. Continuing to take in your smell, his clit begins to stiffen.

‘Oh. That’s why’. He thinks to himself, feeling himself beginning to throb. He reaches down, hand grasping himself and beginning to rub in tight circles. He whimpers, pulling your pillow towards his face, increasing his speed. Imagining it’s you who’s touching him, he spreads his legs wider, reaching further to delve inside. Fingers crooking, palm hitting his throbbing clit, he’s nearing the end while stuttering out your name.

“This is a very pleasant surprise,” your voice cutting through the pleasure, he gasps and his eyes fly open. Startled, he closes his legs and sits up, watching you come further into the bedroom. “Aw, missed me so much, huh?” You teased, beginning to rid yourself of your clothing as you walked closer to the bed. He nods, reaching his hands out for you for which you happily obliged, crawling onto the bed and into his embrace.

“Missed you so much,” you whisper into his ear, pulling back and kissing him deeper. Leon moans, clutching onto your upper arms as you ease him to lay back down. “Let me take care of you, pretty boy.” He makes a noise in the back of his throat at the pet name, burying his nose into your neck and taking you in. You’re here now, that’s all he could ask for. 

You pull away from him and pepper kisses down his body, kissing over new abrasions and bruises, softly rubbing his aching muscles and you descend further. His muscles begin to loosen up, pleasure coursing through his being. All at once, you grab the back of his thighs and push them up, diving in to lick from his hole to his clit, sucking it in your mouth.

A moan tears through him, back arching. “F-fuck, feels so good, baby, love you so much, missed you so much,” he babbles, his hand reaching down to grab at your head, pulling you closer to his core. You breathe him in, his natural scent mixed with the soap from his recent shower has you groaning yourself. 

Dropping one of his thighs to slide two fingers into him, quickly picking up the rhythm he likes as well as hitting the spot you know drives him mad, Leon’s eyes roll back into his head as his thighs begin trembling. “M’so close, don’tstopdon’tstopdon’tstop,” words almost incomprehensible from how fast he’s rambling, hips rocking up into your face, he cums with a cry of your name. His clit rhythmically jumps in your mouth, walls clenching tightly against your fingers, he’s seeing heaven. 

Keeping your ministrations going until he pats your head, you pull away, climbing up his body and pulling him into you. Leon cups your face and pulls you into a sleepy, yet passionate lip lock. With your own hand tracing his sharp jawline, you whisper, “Welcome home, my beloved.”

Tags: @roseglazedlens, @neondogs, @caramlizedtomatoes, @cheezbites, @dwkfan, @httpsuguru, @scar-crossedlvrs, @xxacademy (Sorry I forgot them when I first posted this, oops)

[tgmsunmontue]

Another Time (Chapter 1/14)

Summary: Jake wakes up in Rooster's body about ~30 or so hours post-Mission and they have to deal with it. They're adults. Apparently.

A/N: There seems to be a lack of body-swap in this fandom, so I thought I’d give it a crack. It’s one of my favourite tropes. I am from New Zealand but I write with lots of ‘z’s and remove a lot of my ‘u’s. However I don’t in my author’s note. Hopefully I caught them all – apologies for slip-ups. (I also type with wrist braces on so my finger mobility can be a bit screwy – that said I’m also a fandom old (but not an elder) so while this isn’t my first fic, it is my first in the fandom and after I’ve taken a break.

Jake’s POV for odd chapters, and Bradley’s POV for even chapters.

Also, obligatory note that I have no knowledge of the US Navy (and that whole ‘girl, what were you doing at the devil’s sacrament?’ thing applies here as well in terms of military propaganda).

(Posting on Tumblr, chapter a day until it's complete (currently 12 chapters in), after which I will post it on AO3 once a day until it's complete).

CHAPTER ONE 

               Jake wakes up in the sick bay, his breath coming in gasps as his dream fades into mist. Why is he in the sickbay? He doesn’t remember getting here and that’s never a good sign. There’s only half-light, the room has no portholes just some lights left on the dimmest possible setting; he can tell he’s still on the ship. The last thing he remembers though is falling into exhausted slumber in his rack, Javy below him and Payback and Fanboy opposite. He doesn’t feel right though, body aching all over, skin tight in places it shouldn’t be. He holds his hand up in front of his face and squints. Blinks.

                That is not his fucking hand.

                Okay.

                Deep breath.

                In.

                …

                And out.

                …

                Again.

                 …

                He tries to sit up and needs to slow down the movement, body stiff and he’s not in his own body. Or there’s something very wrong with his head. Or both. He’s staring at mostly bare feet that don’t belong to him (one is wrapped in a bandage and is slowly throbbing in time with his heart – it doesn’t feel like a good idea to test bearing weight on it) when the door to the sickbay opens abruptly and he just stares. He guesses he knows where his body got to.

                “Thank fuck! You okay?”

                “I… Rooster?” He’s hazarding a guess, but it’s the only one that makes sense. He has no idea where Mav is, the other bed is empty. And he’s somehow in Rooster’s body, and not in a way he previously imagined was ever possible.

                “Yeah. Fuck this is weird. You’re in my body.”

                “Yeah, no shit. You’re in mine. What the hell happened?”

                “I don’t know! I woke up in your rack and promptly whacked my head because I thought I was here…” Rooster says, putting his hand to his (Jake’s) forehead where a bump is already forming.

                “Be a little more careful with the goods there…” Jake says, and he feels like throwing up a little, although honestly he’s not sure if that’s in response to seeing himself through someone else’s eyes or if he’s feeling Rooster’s concussion. This is already a colossal mindfuck and he’s only been awake for a few minutes.

                “Yeah, you too. Are you feeling okay? I was feeling pretty shit yesterday.”

                “I can confirm this body still feels like shit.”

                “Okay, here, drink some water. I’m allowed to take some ibuprofen. That’ll help.”

                “We need to report this?”

                “No! Fuck. No… I mean, maybe it’s just a short 24 hour thing?”

                “You think it’s like a stomach bug? You think people just change bodies with someone and it goes away overnight?”

                “You have any smarter ideas? I want on the next transport off, and if they think I’m not stable enough to travel… or if something is wrong –”

                “There is something wrong!” Jake hisses, because he is not okay with this. Maybe if he wasn’t feeling like he’d ejected and then crash landed he’d be more… relaxed. Fuck if he knows. He can’t argue with wanting to get back to shore though.

                “Okay, there is. But let’s get back to shore, RTB and then… figure out a plan of attack.”

                “Oh, I cannot wait to hear what you think might work.”

                “Shut up.”

                The door to the sickbay opens again and they both turn to look at the corpsman entering the room.

                “Morning lieutenants. Any reason you’re here Lieutenant Seresin? Not bothering my patient I hope?”

                “Not at all, I just needed, uh, wanted to check on him…”

                Jake watches his own neck flush in embarrassment, and hmm, that’s interesting.

                “He can, uh, stay, while you check me over,” Jake says, because he has no clue what Rooster was like last night, over than alive. He’d been fine on deck right after Mav had (crash) landed, but he suspects adrenaline had been carrying them both forward for the most part. Now it’s been over 24 hours and he’s pretty sure Rooster’s ankle might be broken, given the sharp increase in pain as it dangles freely. He has no idea where Mav has fucking disappeared to, but he’d been here yesterday when he’d popped in for a quick check-in with some of the others.

                “Well, okay. Let’s look at your ankle first. I hope you weren’t seriously considering walking on it after what I told you last night.”

                “Sorry, forgot. Really need to piss,” he states, which is partial truth and lie. He couldn’t forget something he didn’t know.

                “Hmm. Here then.”

                Jake takes the container and chances a quick glance at Bradley who is fucking smirking at him with his own damn face. Unbelievable.

                “Nothing I ain’t seen before sailor…”

                Jake feels heat flood his face for no good reason and that’s mortifying, he’d take his own neck flush of embarrassment over this any day. Of course Bradshaw means it because it’s his fucking body, but the look the medic is giving them is amused, clearly having drawn their own conclusions and Bradshaw is looking completely unrepentant. Asshole.

TWO

[needtoloveoutloud]

Minors little angels pls ignore if you're uncomfy with tipsy peeps

Tell me pls why

- it's past 4am and I am awake and very much so also tipsy (more than tipsy??)

- I am in another city and in a hotel and away from home and my cat and my husband and I am stressed

-i am extremely overwhelmed because a super close collegue of mine is pregnant and we would have been pregnant at the same time and given birth around the same time (tw miscarriage?) (I knew before i lost my baby) and went through everything together and this is the first time I'm seeing her irl and she has a healthy bump and I love her but I also feel like I wanna die when I see her I am so sorry

- I talked about electronic mobility (e-cars), work ethics, Hitler (?) and his rise to power for HOURS?? In the hotel lobby? With a vollegue I am not when close with?

- I apparently make customers of my company feel safe enough to fucking traumadump me out of gd nowhere at 2 am about how he was with his gf for 3 months and she git pregnant andbtheyvhad twins and he doesn't like his life and he is stuck and he legit thinks about leaving out of nowhere like ???? Imma send your girl the number of a lawyer what do u mean ???

- I will have less than 2 h of sleep until I have to get up

- mayhaps I won't even sleep at all wtf do I know

- am crying uncontrollably and fucking semi crack posting on Tumblr about this shit now wtf is my life

Pls ignore, I just need to

Talk to fucking tumblr

Or someone

I guess

[liveinfantacy]

BRATTY BABY (JUNKOOK SMUT)_REQUSTED

pairing: jungkook & reader

warning: dirty talk, strong language, overstimulation, FINGERING, hard and rough smut.

"Baby, are you still awake, I told you to sleep right," Jungkook said while walking toward y/n, "yes, I have to study " y/n said while still focusing on her notebook. Jungkook sighed "Love you only slept for like two hours only, it's not good for your health, let's just go to sleep okay, do your study tomorrow," he said while stroking her hair softly "Jungkook please, I have exams in few days, If I don't study hard right now, I'll going to fail in the exams, so please don't disturb me," y/n said and again started to focus on the notebook, Jungkook get frustrate that why she is not listening to him, but he makes himself calm and again speak sweetly " sweetheart, don't take so much stress over a mere exam, please listen and let's go to sleep hmm," he said and try to take her notes but y/n just glare at him "Jungkook I said don't disturb me, and don't worry about me just worry about yourself, you understand, not leave me alone," she said while getting frustrated and take the notebooks which is Jungkook holding.

Jungkook stared at her, he knows she just stresses because of studying, but he was so mad cause she not caring about her health. "y/n, I am asking you last time, are you coming with me or not" Y/n got a little afraid because of his raspy voice and over that he call her by her name that means he is really angry right now but being stubborn she refuses and again started to study. "okay then " Jungkook said and walk away from there.

y/n gets a little worried now cause, Jungkook is the most dangerous mafia in the world and also the richest person in the world, he can do anything he wants. She just sigh and started to focus on her study. After a few minutes suddenly her mobile get a notification, y/n check the notification and her eyes widened "What the fuck, why do suddenly exams get postponed, how-" she started to think that how a can university cancels exams suddenly which are actually few days. finally, it clicked to her, that who is behind all this "Jungkook " she shout his name loudly, she knows her mafia boyfriend can do anything by making just one call.

Jungkook came while smirking at her, she glared at him "What is it Jungkook, why did you postpone exams, why do you alw-" stop speaking when he put his finger on her lips to make her shut "Shh baby or I will cancel the exams which I just postponed seeing your hard work" he said in deep voice making her gulp her saliva . he came close to her face "now come with me and sleep okay" he said and about to pull her with him but she stands still not moving from her place "I am not going anywhere, even though exams are postponed but still I am going to study " she said with courage, Jungkook close his eyes to calm himself, he is losing his control over his anger seeing her stubborn self. he look back at her while she look down not wanting to look at him, in the next second she was in his arms, "what are you doing " she ask while struggling to get down but he hold her tight and started to walk toward the bedroom " Jungkook leave me to put me down, I have to study" she said but he ignored and enter on their shared bedroom, he walked toward the bed and put her down gently on the bed before she gets up he hovers over her body making her shiver.

"my baby getting bratty day by day, isn't she," he said while being dangerously close to her face "Yes, so what, what will you do Hua," she said while raising one eyebrow at him, he smirked toward her bratty behavior "then daddy should punish his bratty babygirl, so she can learn her lesson and be good girl, right" he said while rubbing her lips with his thumb. she widen her eyes and try to get up but her strength is nothing in front of him.

"Jungkook-" Before she says something he cut her off by kissing her passionately, he started to suck on her lips and lick her lips asking her permission to enter his tongue but y/n refused, she started to stop him but him being strong don't let go of her. after satisfying himself he pulls out from kiss and stare at her face, she glared at him "leave me," she said with anger but he just smirks, his hand started to go down from her stomach and then in her panties "what are you- ahh" she moaned when he started to palm her fold "ahh please stop," she said and hold his hand which is in her panties." do you want me to stop" he asks while going closer to her face "yes-ahh" before she says anything he enter his meddle finger inside her pussy and stated thrusting slowly "ahh Jungkook-" she started to moan while closing her eyes "yes baby, answer me do you want me to stop hmm," he asks again and enter two more fingers and started to move in and out in fast pace. "ahhh no please don't stop , oh my god" y/n said while biting her lips and feeling intense pleasure in her body "that's what I think " Jungkook said and pull her dress strand from her shoulder , he started to kiss her neck "ahhh it feels so good , ahhh" y/n started to feel her high , Jungkook realize it when she clench her pussy walls around his fingers " are you going to cum baby hmm , cum on my fingers babygirl" he said and stare at her face ,while y/n close her eyes in pleasure "ahhh I am gonna cum-" she said and finally cum on his fingers "good girl" he said and pull out his fingers slowly while getting up.

y/n open her eyes and stare at him who is already looking at her with a smirk. suddenly he stand between her legs and pull down her panties in one go "What are you-" she is about to ask but he cut her off " Do you think its over, not yet Baby girl, " he said and spread her legs wide and went down near her pussy, she knows what he is going to do "Jungkook stop, I am sensitive please" she pleaded but he ignored her pleading and leak her sensitive bud "ahh" she moans in pain of overstimulation " it's your punishment for being a bratty baby" he said and started to eat her out "ah stop " y/n begged and started to close her legs but Jungkook hold her legs tightly and started to lick her pussy.

y/n finally came for the third time but Jungkook does not seem to stop he eating her out like its a meal "Ahh Jungkook please " Y/n said while gripping his hair in her one hand "Please what baby" he ask her while looking at her "please stop I can't " she said but he ignored her and again started to eat her out. "ahh Jungkook no I can't anymore" she begged him to stop, her eyes get teary, "you can and you will " y/n started to moan loudly, she started to cry cause of overstimulation but till she is getting so much pleasure, his tongue doing magic on her pussy, she looked down at him, he creates mess there his mouth covered with her cum, his hair is all messy but still he licking her pussy with his wet and warm tongue.

finally, when she cum fourth time in a row, Jungkook smirked proudly when he realize he make her cum fourth time. y/n started to breathe heavily. the hand gripping his hair now loosen up. he again started to lick her pussy but stop when didn't get any reaction , he look up at her and chuckled , y/n is fall sleep already. he get up and went to washroom to wash his face , he came back with towel . he again spread her legs and clean her there. after cleaning her he lay beside her and cover both of them with blanket.

"my bratty baby," he said and kiss her forehead, he take her sleeping figure in his arms and slept.

[android-and-ale]

AU Where Spock Lives Out Both Sides of a May/December Romance

I had an angsty A.U. idea drop into my head where Spock gets to be on both ends of two different May/December romances. Since I am all about lighthearted shenanigans right now, I’m putting it out there for anyone else to use, in whole or any bits and pieces you like. 

TL;DR - The timeline here has changed so Pike and Kirk are separated by 50 years. 

Spock meets Pike when Spock is in his late 20’s and Pike is in his 50’s. They end up together for the rest of Pike’s life. 

After Pike’s death, Spock is only in his late 70’s, which is still younger than Sarek was when he married Amanda. He goes back to the last place he felt belonging and contentment before he met Pike, which, of course, is Starfleet. Within a few years, he’s risen in the ranks to become the Chief Science Officer of the flagship, the Enterprise. A brash young Captain takes over. Kirk is 50 years his junior, not to mention his CAPTAIN, but despite his best efforts to resist, there’s a spark between them. 

THE ANGSTY DETAILS:

The biggest difference here is Pike and Kirk’s personal timelines. Instead of their service overlapping, they’re decades apart. 

Spock meets Pike fresh out of the academy and there is an instant mutual attraction. Since he’s not a predator, Pike decides OH HELL NO, this kid is way too young for me. Meanwhile, Baby!Spock has just ended things with T’Pring and is entering his Slut Era. Pike resists Spock’s charms for a couple of years, but during an away mission gone wrong when they both think they’re going to die in the next hour, they end up furiously making out and giving each other handjobs. 

When they’re rescued Pike says listen, kid, that can’t happen again. Spock is prepared for this. He makes a PowerPoint outlining why this relationship is logical. They’re intensely compatible, mutually attracted, and frankly, their lives will only overlap for a maximum of five years. After all, they both know Spock is on a fast track to being promoted to X.O. of a science vessel, and later his own command. Let us acknowledge the fleeting nature of time by embracing this all too brief opportunity to be mutually beneficial to one another. 

Pike tells himself he’s going to hell for this - a lot - but gives in. 

Over the next decade, Spock does get promoted up to Chief Science Officer, and eventually also steps in as X.O. when Pike’s Number One is offered her own command. Starfleet repeatedly tries to give Spock his own ship, but he’s happy where he is, at his Captain’s side. Life is good. 

And then Pike’s accident happens. 

Starfleet Medical says it’s bad. Really bad. There’s no brain damage, but his body is a ruin. He’s going to spend the rest of his life essentially with locked-in syndrome, only able to communicate with the outside world in a very slow binary. 

Spock calls bullshit. Instead of taking Pike to Talos IV like he did in The Menagerie, he contacts Una and asks for the biggest favor of his life. Transport both of them to Illyria and put him in touch with people who can use their genetic engineering technology to help Pike. 

Una says she’s so glad he called, because if he hadn’t, she was planning to kidnap Pike herself for that very same reason. As soon as they touch down on Illyria, Spock resigns his commission so he can be there for Pike. 

Pike spends the next two years on Illyria getting treatments and therapies. Eventually, they’re able to restore his hearing to 70% of what it was, his vision to about 20/80 (so now he wears sexy glasses), his VOICE, and a limited amount of his mobility. He’s still disabled, but he has autonomy again. He’s able to get himself in and out of his wheelchair, and even take a few steps when absolutely necessary, but he’s never going to walk unaided. He needs at least 10 hours of sleep a night to be fully functional, but when he’s awake, his mind is as sparkling as ever. 

Because of the differences in how much sleep they need, Spock ends up living two lives. When Pike is awake, he’s the center of Spock’s world. When he’s not, Spock maintains a thriving part-time career in the sciences. As far as he’s concerned, this is a very satisfying have-your-cake-and-eat-it-too compromise. 

Pike tries to tell Spock to go back to Starfleet. Pursue his own command. Stop wasting his time with a disabled old man. Spock tells him sorry, it’s too late for that. I told Starfleet we were married in order to get access to your hospital room, and Una backed me up. I meant to tell you, but we’ve been busy, you know, kidnapping you then performing illegal medical aid. According to Starfleet paperwork, we’ve been married for the last 3 years. Our anniversary is in March, and Una will be throwing us a party. Do you really think I would break Starfleet’s (very human-history-centric) laws and bring you here in the first place just to abandon you?

Because of Starfleet’s draconian anti-genetic-engineering laws, Pike essentially loses most of his citizenship rights. He and Spock give zero shits. Sarek steps in and says hey, your husband has a lot of diplomatic experience, having been Captain of the Flagship, and you Spock grew up in my shadow. Let me set the two of you up in a new career. Spock and Pike become a well trusted power couple, frequently sought out by anyone needing fair and impartial diplomats. 

They stay together for the rest of Pike’s life. 

And then, in the worst year of Spock’s life, within three months he loses both his human husband and his human mother. 

He knew this would happen. Human lifespans are so much shorter than Vulcan ones. On top of that, Pike was well into middle age when they met. That doesn’t make it any less devastating. 

He’s only in his 70’s, which for Vulcans is pretty young. Sarek didn’t marry Amanda until his 80’s, and it’s not uncommon for Vulcans to put off starting a family until they’re over 100. Everyone he meets tells him he’s young enough to start his whole life over, and he wants to punch them all. 

The only person who understands is his father. 

Both he and Sarek are devastated. They lean on one another in their grief. After a year, Sarek asks Spock what was his last happy/contented memory before he met Pike. Spock tries to deny it, but when he’s finally able to be honest with himself, the answer is Starfleet. He spent years there before he met Pike, and was well on his way to what everyone expected to be an illustrious career. Sarek says perhaps you should go back there? It’ll be different than it was decades ago, but that too is a good thing. 

Una’s still around. Illyrians have longer lifespans than humans, though shorter than Vulcans. When he asks her advice she says if he didn’t bring Starfleet up soon she would’ve. She’s already reached out to her many contacts in the fleet about putting together an unofficial refresher course so Spock won’t have to go through the academy again.

He buries himself in taking virtual, updated versions of academy classes, and uses his diplomatic assignments on a variety of ships as an excuse to get a real world refresher in modern ship design and culture. When he’s satisfied, he gathers his new transcripts and references and sets up a meeting with an admiral (because he’s the kind of diplomat who can casually do that). They agree to put him on a smaller vessel to get his feet wet again, but with full understanding that he will absolutely be able to rise quickly in the ranks if Starfleet is still a good fit for him.

He spends a year on a science vessel, then a year on an exploration vessel, then is offered the position of Chief Science Officer of the Enterprise - the very post he left when Pike was injured all those years ago. Yes, Sarek and Una are absolutely pulling some strings in the background, but Spock rises to the occasion. 

He’s missed this more than he would admit to himself while Pike was still alive. His duties bring him contentment and peace - but also excitement and adventure. He has no regrets about the decades he spent with Pike, but now his One True Love is space. 

A few years into his service on the Enterprise, the ship gets a brash new captain - James T. Kirk. And god dammit, there’s a spark. Kirk likes what he sees, and flirts mercilessly. Spock tries to tell himself he’s not into it, but deep down, he isn’t sure how long he’ll be able to resist. 

At this point, Spock is 50 years Kirk’s senior. He desperately wishes he could talk to Pike again. Pike would laugh his ass off at Spock getting his comeuppance. Now you know how it felt, all those years ago, when you were a tasty morsel who wouldn’t take no for an answer! On nights when the chess games with Kirk feel a little too intimate, he listens to Pike’s Captain’s Logs from the years when he was resisting Spock’s advances. This mirroring of their lives makes him feel closer to his dead husband. 

Spock gets the biggest shock of his life when his father announces he’s not only remarrying, but taking another human wife. 

Spock rages at him. How can you do this to yourself AGAIN? 

Sarek points out that first, the very few Vulcan widows his age do not want him. Second, he’s used to having a human around. And third, at his age, he and his wife will actually grow old together. Their estimated remaining lifespans are within a decade of one another.

He reassures Spock that yes, he would’ve preferred to grow old with Amanda, but he always knew that their lives together would be cut short. Being with her as long as he could was still worth it. Then he tells Spock not to let the pain of his loss prevent him from seeking out future happiness. That’s not what Pike would’ve wanted. Or Amanda. 

Sarek has seen Spock and Kirk together on assignment, and he knows a lot of Spock’s anger is because he’s repressing his own feelings. He points out that with modern medical technology, if Kirk can avoid getting himself killed in the line of duty, he could realistically expect to live another 70+ years. It’s not a perfect alignment with Spock’s aging trajectory, but they could reasonably expect to be middle aged together for decades. 

Spock says there is no damn way he’s getting involved with another human. The heartbreak isn’t worth it. He’d rather spend the rest of his life dedicated to science. He’s had his Romance Era and now that part of his life is over. 

Until one day, he and Kirk are on an away mission gone wrong. They’re trapped in a cave, and realistically believe that they have less than 4 hours left to live. Kirk says hey, we’re going to die, we should give in to this UST. Spock protests he’s too old for Kirk. Kirk laughs and says they’re both going to be dead in four hours, so who cares? Let’s live a little before we die. 

Spock remembers being the one who said the same thing to Pike. He’s hit with an overwhelming sense of deja vu as he gives in and lets Jim kiss him for the first time. He’s terrified of opening his heart again, but when Jim says his name like a prayer, he thinks yes, I could do this for the next 70 years. It’ll be worth it. He kisses Jim back, and in that moment it feels both like coming home and the start of something new. Losing this man will break him, but not as badly as turning away from a lifetime of love. 

[ilgaksu]

I'm sleeby too so my prompt is also: sleepy

Sleepy heihua maybe? Or whoever you feel like writing! Are they grumpy? Are they cute? Are they morning people? Who is bringing the caffeine, what were they up to late at night...(I'm rambling soz)

(what i find SUPER fun about this choice is that i actually think i write heihua resting too much, and i suspect it's partially me using rest-as-kindness for characters who are nearly always defined by what they do. I accidentally fell into writing a headcanon I've always held, which is Xiao Hua is an inhuman monster who is energised after sex, because it was that or just outline their imagined coffee orders. Which, you know. Secretly vanilla latte but gets snobby about it, cheapest item for caffeine yield on the menu, guess who is who.)

There had been a moment, you know? Horrible in its depth and clarity, all Truth Climbing Out of Her Well To Shame Mankind; minor key eulogy in concerto; ask not for whom the bell tolls, it tolls for thee -

And it had been the one where Hei Xiazi had realised how truly, madly, deeply fucked over he was going to be by this man, and it had been shortly after they first time they had fucked, so the verb form truly is doing dual-lifting this time. Every night since Xie Yuchen had intruded onto his life, and then every morning, and incidental, alternate, opportune times, a similar pattern has emerged. Today was not an exception.

With all the scathing curiosity of a scientist, Xie Yuchen sits up in bed, reaches over Hei Xiazi's prone body for his phone, and says, sounding entirely, searingly awake, "Why is it that you're always falling asleep after?"

Hei Xiazi half-opens his eyes in outrage at the implied criticism. Xie Yuchen briefly looks at him, clear-eyed and unrepentant, the smug little shit. If it wasn't for the darkening bruises on his chest and the kissed-stupid colour of his mouth, he might look as alert as he does walking into a morning meeting. It's obscene. It's unnatural. Hei Xiazi feels like he's being killed on a hill entirely worth dying on, because -

"I'm tired," Hei Xiazi says, and the incensed nature of the statement isn't carrying over too well with most of his face pressed against a pillow, but he refuses to move and concede ground. He's earned this. "I put in work, and then I get tired. That's human biology."

"Hm," Xie Yuchen says, with the mild disbelief of the superior. "I didn't realise we were an ongoing scientific demonstration. Am I grading you for effort, or on a curve?"

He returns to opening up one of the many stupid little mobile games on his phone he refuses to admit he's always playing. Hei Xiazi has seen his player score on at least three different ones, and nobody is getting to that number without some serious, single-minded waste of their one wild and precious life. In his opinion.

"It's normal," Hei Xiazi feels compelled to state, "To be tired right now."

"You've said."

"I'm saying again."

"I've heard you say it again now," Xie Yuchen replies, "If you're tired, aren't you meant to be asleep?"

His hand, very briefly, reaches down and sinks into Hei Xiazi's hair, combing out the tangled mess of it -

Until he's fully absorbed back into the complexities of fucking Tetris or whatever and needs the hand back to, Hei Xiazi doesn't even know, turn the leaderboard into an unholy massacre.

Hei Xiazi sighs, and tells himself he wins if he does nothing else but close his eyes again.

[bloop-im-a-frog-now]

If The Gods Were Kind — wings

We are now at the hurt/comfort part of this fic!!! It only took 7 parts to get there... I would like to thank Jupiter for giving me this prompt for the @lifefanworkexch and @bluiex and their anons for all the positive feedback.

Enjoy!

Master Post

— —

Content warnings: None that I can see, tell me if that’s not the case!

This was the third time. Three too many. Why Pizza? She barely did anything wrong. He wasn’t sure if he should trust Etho’s word, even when he confirmed it to Grian personally. Were they using Pizza as leverage against him? What did they want from him?

The chill breeze of the night submerged him, a shiver coursing through his body. He held his crutches closer to his legs, afraid of dropping them. He didn’t want to run down the mountain to catch tumbling crutches. Today had been a rough physical day, and he would rather keep all of his energy to eat and find a comfortable position to sleep. 

He looked up and wished he was surrounded by the natural light of the moon instead of torches. The torches were important though. If Grian caught him getting rid of them, his glare might kill him on sight. Scar didn’t want to get Grian mad at him. 

Speaking of his companion, he was almost done building their tower. Scar watched him, head turned. Grian glanced back and forth between the two materials in his hands. When Scar was around, he had often asked him to help him identify what he was holding. Scar found it odd, but Grian also helped him decipher messages in the chat log. Each to their own quirks. 

He heard his name being yelled and flinched, his thoughts dissolving. He tried to identify who said his name and saw Grian waving at him from the top of the tower. He sighed, a small smile forming, stood up, and walked inside their base. Grian might’ve put stairs and slabs throughout the mountain to facilitate going up, but inside, he didn’t bother. Scar wasn’t annoyed. He could climb ladders on a good day. Most of their stuff was on the first floor, so Scar didn’t bother going to the upper levels. 

Still, after parading around the world, he had trouble raising his foot onto the next step. He had his crutches in his inventory, knowing he’d be disadvantaged with them in his hands. As he climbed the ladder, his muscles cried in overuse and wished for a break. He groaned at the aches in his shoulders and hips.

After many close calls of falling, Scar reached the second level of their tower. Grian sat on the edge of the small tower he was building. Scar leaned against the ramparts and gestured at Grian to ask away. The avian jumped down to Scar’s level, flapping his wings in reflex, and showed him the two materials he had been looking at for the past five minutes. 

“Am I holding birch or sandstone?”

Scar leaned closer to the materials. He pointed at his left. “That’s sandstone.” He pointed at the other material. “That’s just sand.”

Grian groaned, mumbling about sand and how useless his eyes were, and used dirt to get himself back up. Scar simply admired Grian working as he finished the small tower. He was still wearing his red sweater, despite Scar trying to convince him to put on some lighter clothes. Scar also wondered how Grian was this mobile while wearing armor. 

He rested his head against the ramparts, eyes closing under the moonlight. He almost dozed off when he heard dirt being shoveled. He jerked awake, and gaped at the tower before him, in awe of Grian's talents. Grian stood beside him, hands on his hips. 

“Whaddya think?”

“It’s,” Scar paused. “It looks amayzin’ .”

Grian chuckled. “Glad you like it, ‘cause we’re gonna live in it for a while.”

Scar nodded, squinting his eyes to study the tower closely. There was a mix of materials; sand, sandstone, stripped birch log. At the top, the ramparts were oak stairs, and lanterns hung to illuminate the monument. Scar elbowed playfully Grian’s shin, careful to evade the legging, a smirk on his face.

“I didn’t know you had talents for building.”

Grian blinked at him, then gazed at the tower. “Me neither,” the wind carried his quiet voice. 

Scar’s smirk dropped. He followed Grian’s gaze, a pit growing in his stomach. Nobody talked about the holes in their memories. It was one of the most obvious things to question about, to learn more about this world. Yet, no one brought it up.

“How much do you remember?” Scar asked. 

Grian grimaced. “Not much.” His few feathers ruffled, almost jerking to open up. “I remember the feeling of flying.”

Scar hummed. He glanced at the macaw wings. “Do they hurt?”

Grian sent him a questioning look. “What do you mean?”

“Your wings.”

Grian sighed loudly. He sat down beside Scar, elbow propped on his knee, chin resting on his knuckles.

“It’s not the most comfortable,” Grian admitted. His wings fluttered. Scar wondered if that meant anything in avian body language. “I guess it just sucks that they’re basically useless and ugly.”

Scar quirked his eyebrow. “I find them quite magnificent.” Grian stayed silent for a while. “Are they normally this greasy?”

Scar was extremely curious, but he learned over the last few days that Grian kept to himself, preferred his personal space, his time alone. Scar never wanted anyone to feel uncomfortable around him. After all, there can’t be an alliance without some trust. A voice in his head told him that he and Grian weren’t allies, Grian was stuck with him. He promptly ignored it.

“No,” Grian’s voice was muffled by his fist, but Scar heard him clearly. 

“Is it like taking care of your hair?”

Grian sighed, looking away, eyes closed. “I guess.”

Scar frowned. “Why aren’t you taking care of your wings?” The sound of the mobs filled the silence, and a pit formed in his stomach. “You don’t need to answer me.”

Grian looked so distant, so deep in thought, Scar wasn’t sure what was alright and what was not in avian culture. Was it normal to not take care of your wings? Was it a sign of laziness or just the fact that Grian was too busy to take care of his wings? Sure, his wings looked damaged, with patches of skin showing underneath those red feathers, his primaries cut and their structure looking twisted. He might remember the names of every creature, but anything beyond that was out of his realm. 

“Why would I take care of something useless?” Grian said, frustration in his voice.

Scar hummed. “Do you think hair is useless?”

“Yes.”

Straightforward as always, it seemed. “Then why do you keep telling me to go wash myself?”

Grian harrumphed. “That’s different.”

Scar laughed. “It is very much not so different.”

Grian groaned.

“Is it because you need help?” Scar wasn’t sure if he was allowed to ask that, but he would much rather Grian be comfortable. He might be his lackey, but that’s no excuse to treat him with little dignity. Grian shifted his eyes to him. Scar looked away. 

“Yeah,” came in the soft reply. Scar’s head snapped towards his teammate, shocked. Grian gave him a leveled look, cheeks warm. From the day under the sun or something else, Scar couldn’t decipher. “Not here, though.”

Grian gestured the ladder. Scar assumed he wanted to do it in their shared room. He wasn’t sure what he was helping with. He almost slipped off the ladder (his grip kept getting weak no matter how hard he clenched the steps), but Grian caught him before any bones could be broken. 

Grian guided him to their room and sat down on his bed. He pointed at his wings.

“Can you take out anything that’s sticking out that’s not a feather? Only touch the scapular and secondary coverts, I can’t reach those spots very well.”

Scar complied. He inspected the area closer to Grian’s back, gently taking out twigs, chunks of dirt and sand. Every time his hand brushed past the region Grian told him to work on, the wing would shiver and give out a twitch. He winced, but kept going. As he took one of the last twigs out (how were they able to hide so well under the scarce feathers?), he cleared his throat.

“You’ll tell me if it’s getting too much for you, right?”

Grian scoffed and rolled his shoulders back when Scar gently dusted sand out. “Yes, of course. You didn’t pull on any feathers so far, so you’re good.”

Scar nodded. He realized Grian couldn’t see him and hummed in confirmation instead. His fingers reached underneath the feathers, almost grazing the skin, to get rid of some dirt and sand hidden there. The wings suddenly stretched out, making him stubble away from the bed. His knees buckled and his legs trembled. He clutched the edge of the bed in order to not fall over Grian even if the call of its comfort tempted him. 

He shook his head to clear his mind. Right, he did walk all the way to the Crastle (which did look like a toilet seat for a while), and made his way to the village to get the cat Etho found there (he lost 50 points of reputation for giving him false hope like that). He tried to contain his grimace, but he felt his brows frown and his jaw click shut. Grian turned back, eyes wide.

“Oh gosh, I’m so sorry.”

Scar clenched his teeth, trying to stop the trembling and ignoring the ache in his calves and the heaviness in his hips. He let out a chuckle, flashing a reassuring smile.

“No, it’s okay, it just took me by surprise,” he laughed, huffing slightly. He was so glad he wasn’t wearing any armor and that Grian didn’t scold him about it. 

“It’s my fault, I should’ve warned you.”

Scar waved him off. “Your fault, my fault, gods above fault.” Grian stared at him for a couple of seconds. Scar hesitated. “Do you… want me to continue?”

Grian’s cheeks became red, and Scar wondered if Grian caught a sunburn or if he felt embarrassed. About what, Scar didn’t know.

“N-no, it’s fine,” Scar swore Grian’s voice raised an octave, but decided it was his imagination, “I can take it from here.”

Scar nodded. “If you need anything else, I’ll be in the kitchen.”

Grian hummed, already brushing his feathers with his fingers. Scar let him be, and decided to make Pizza’s favorite meal. Maybe if she could smell it, she would come back home.

<- Prev _  Master Post _ Next ->

[reveuni]

The Flower & the weed: chapter five

Prev // mlist // next

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ Synopsis: Yerim a girl used as a drug mule by her own mom. After a drug delivery goes wrong she flees the city and heads to the countryside where she meets a boy. He’s taking care of a garden behind school where he unbeknownst take care of a illegal plant

ੈ✩‧₊˚ Pairing:Jungwon x fem! drug mule! reader

It’s Friday night and the city is still awake. The moon’s glow was strong, and the air was chilly. Yerim shivered and pulled her black bomber jacket tighter around her, people who were out partying wore light clothing and didn't seem to care about the cold weather. Massive buildings stood beside the street, loud noises could be heard from all the clubs open. Yerim was now outside club Aura, waiting for the guard to finish looking at her ID. Without a suspicion, he let her in. Loud music, people yelling and dancing, the smell of sweat and alcohol fills her nostril’s. She is trying to slip through the crowd, but it's hard when people dance body to body with each other and push the girl back and forth. She has reached a staircase and begin to text the customer.

A man in a white shirt comes forward her and whispers in her left ear.

“Reindeer”

“ID”

The man takes out his mobile and shows his chat ID now she knows it’s him.

She leaves two bottles in the man's hand, and she gets back a wad of money. She skims through it quickly to see she got it right money back. She was done for the day, all she wanted was to go home and sleep. On the way out, she sees a familiar woman in a tight-fitting black dress, the face is very familiar. The woman approached her when she was within range so yerim could see her properly, she saw the one and only Joohyun.

“What are you doing here?!”

She grabs Joohyun's wrist and when joohyun notices it's yerim she tries to pull away from her grip.

“What are you doing?”

She asks Joohyun once more. The girl's face was not pleased at all.

“What about you. Are you selling here!”

She snarls back.

A bit away, Yeji and her group are standing and looking towards them surprised that Yerim is in a club.

“What the hell! Is that Yerim?”

“Huh? Yerim… it's true that's her”.

“Do you guys know her? She can join us”

A man comes up to Yeji and wraps his arm around her shoulders. Yeji doesn't answer him. She hadn't even listened to what he said, she was completely absorbed in listening to their conversation.

“Let's go and talk to her”

“Come back quickly I will be here” Said the man, drunk and impatient.

“What did you do with your expensive clothes?”

“What expensive clothes it's all just debt.”

They couldn't believe their eyes. The silver spoon child wasn't wearing her usual expensive branded clothes. She was instead wearing worn out all black clothes, a dusty cap that had become more gray than black a new different sight for the group.

“What a joke she is always acting like she is all that. You and your mom are just pretending to be rich”.

“Joohyun let's go”

Yerim still has a grip on her wrist, she tries to pull her out of the place, but she refuses and pulls back.

“She’s with us starting next week”

The man from before came towards them again and asks them.

“You are not coming?”

“Go ahead” Joohyun answered him.

“Hurry up”

The man was also very familiar. He had a white shirt the same as the customer she sold to she looks closer and recognizes his face and his snake ring on his index finger, it’s him.

“Anyway we are busy, so we’ll get going, let's go”

“Are you really going to hang out with those guys?”

When Yerim realizes who Joohyun really was going to hang out with, she became more worried and tried even harder to get her out of the place.

“I'm asking you a question”

“So what if I am. Why do you even care”

“Those guys….just don't be with them”

“And if I do?”

“For fuck’s sake just listen to me”

“Who the hell are you and why the hell should I listen to you? Do not talk to me anymore”

Yerim can't stand to argue anymore she leaves the troublesome girl inside the club, why does she even care. She was now some blocks away from the club, you could still hear the music in the background. She can't completely let it go with Joohyun. She sits down at a bench thinking should she go back in or not. Why should she, she doesn't care about her, but still, what if the man uses the drugs Yerim has sold, and he spikes her drink. After a while, she decides to go in and really get her out. She does the same routine as before to get in. She runs around the whole club looking for the girl. She arrives at a table completely deserted of people. All that was left were drinking glasses with empty bottoms and liquor bottles and the small bottles Yerim had sold, he had used them after all. They had left the table. Yerim thought it was not her problem anymore until she realizes that there is someone laying under the table completely still. Yerim runs forward and shakes the woman to make the woman respond to her actions, but no response comes from the girl.

“Hey,Joohyun…Joohyun”

She puts her one finger in front of her nose, she doesn't feel any air coming out of her nose. She tries to get her cell phone out of her pocket and almost drops it from shaking. She dials 911 and gets on the line, immediately a lady answers the call.

“This is 911. What can I help you with”?

“She…she is not breathing. Here is a person who is not breathing”.

“Where are you calling from?”

“Club…. Aura”

After she had called 911 she had rushed to the bus stop to buy a ticket for the earliest bus leaving, she could not stay in the city. After she had rode the bus a bit, the landscape began to change, it went from skyscrapers to farmland. When she arrived, it was an early morning. She was unable to understand what had just happened during the night Joohyun was dead. She sat down on a bench completely destroyed, she started crying and shaking. She cried and cried, so people were staring at her and didn't know what to do with her.

“Excuse me. Are you okay?”

She looks up at the person who had just asked her how she was. It was a boy around the same age, he had feline-like eyes who looked at her with a concerned look.

“I…killed”

She looks down again and tries to get the words out from her mouth, but her sobs made it hard for her to get it out.

“What did you say?”

She wipes away the tears with her sleeve and tries to calm herself down and is able to get the words out.

“I killed someone”

[zaebeecee]

Pairing: Hannibal Lecter x Will Graham

Prompt: “It’s a surprise.”

•••

“I’m going to be out most of the day.”

Will looked up from his coffee and, instead, focused on the man in the chair across from him. Hannibal wasn’t giving him the same courtesy, instead focused on cutting into his frittata. It was the same image their breakfast nook had borne every morning since they had first moved into the house: Will wearing the same clothes he had been since he woke at roughly four AM, Hannibal in one of his suits without a single hair out of place.

“Out?” Will prompted, when Hannibal didn’t elaborate. His lover—or perhaps it was fiancé, Will didn’t know anymore—didn’t take the bait. “Where are you going?”

“I can’t tell you. It’s a surprise.”

“I hate surprises.”

Hannibal’s lips curved into the shape of one of his more infuriating smiles. “I know. You aren’t eating.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“You’ve been awake for nearly five hours.”

Will set his coffee down and picked up his fork in a manner that he hoped would read as begrudging. The frittata was full of fresh and crisp vegetables, the egg supplemented with spinach, red pepper, and mushroom. The moment that Will swallowed the first bite, he realized he was hungry after all. This annoyed him, so he elected to not tell Hannibal that he liked it. “How long will you be gone?”

The infuriating smile was still there. Hannibal knew Will liked it. This also annoyed him. “Until this evening, I imagine,” Hannibal answered. “I must ask that you remain at home while I am gone.”

That was, of course, what Will did most every day, except when he had errands or Hannibal took him out somewhere. “Why?” Will asked, suspicious and full of a sudden urge to go somewhere even though he hated leaving the house and he hated being around people even more.

“It’s a surprise.”

“You’re pissing me off.” A threatless sentence. Sentiment without heat. They both knew it.

“Just stay here while I’m gone, Will. Please.” A word that would have been used to placate, were Hannibal speaking to anyone else. Will, however, was not one to be soothed by empty niceties and polite, expected phrases. What did move him was sincerity, especially sincerity so transparent as what Hannibal had been electing to wear in recent months.

He thinks you’re going to leave, Will thought.

“Fine. I’ll stay at home,” Will said.

“Thank you.”

Will had already finished his frittata. He didn’t know if he was still hungry or not. He turned back to his coffee. The silence was odd, maintained like a thick blanket pulled over and between them until Hannibal broke it again.

“How is your physical therapy going?”

“Fine,” Will said, and found he meant it. “I have most of the mobility back in my shoulder.”

“Does that mean you plan to start going on your morning runs again?”

“I don’t know.” Will had taken all of his morning runs with Winston, once he was trained to stay close to him. “I hadn’t thought about it.” Except he had, most every day since he had fully internalized surviving the fall, and it was no less painful that morning than it had been every other.

“I would like you to consider it.”

Breakfast concluded, and Hannibal left Will with a kiss and a promise that he would return soon after nightfall. The front door closing felt like a wall of separation between them, and Will wondered when he had grown so pathetic that he could barely function without the knowledge of where Hannibal was. Most days, it was fine: Will understood where Hannibal was going, what he was doing, and when he would be back. It wasn’t until this moment that Will realized Hannibal had been so specific for his benefit.

You’ve grown so accustomed to knowing exactly where to find him that you can’t cope with the idea of him occupying a space outside of your awareness.

There were a thousand things that Will could do around the house, so naturally, by the time the clock in the entry hall struck noon, he hadn’t completed any of them. Not for the first time, it struck Will how thoughtful Hannibal had been in designing their living space, taking Will’s acquiescence to live with him as a sign to try and make that life as comfortable as possible. He had a shed in the backyard to work in, and a better fishing rod than the one he’d had to leave behind, with all kinds of books dotted around the house, some of them even in Hannibal’s study for the times that he was working at home and Will either wanted or needed to hover in his periphery. There was even a piano, larger than the one he’d had at his house, dark wood and vintage with real ebony and ivory keys. At first, Will wondered if Hannibal was attempting to purchase either his loyalty or his attention, but that wasn’t Hannibal’s style. Hannibal simply wanted Will to be…

…happy.

Will wasn’t certain he was capable of happiness.

It had been six months, and their relationship remained as contentious as it had been in those days that Will was pretending (pretending?) that he would run away with Hannibal. Of course, the flavor of the contention had changed: now, instead of riding a pendulum between having cordial dinners together and plotting their murder of one another, they alternated between bouts of passionate sex and an almost gut-wrenching clingy need for one another and phases of exchanging little more than pithy and petty insults. Will was aware it was unhealthy, even more so than every other romantic liaison he’d ever had, but he didn’t know how to stop the anger and the bitterness and every other pent-up emotion he couldn’t help but unleash on the man he had given up everything for.

There were moments that he wished Hannibal were there so he could shove him away and tell him to leave him alone. This was one of those moments.

He sat at the piano, even though he knew he should eat something. He was hungry. But he was already sitting, and despite the knowledge that he should go to the kitchen, he couldn’t make himself move. Instead, he laid his hands on the keys and began to play.

The melody wasn’t anything in particular, simply dabbling in A Minor and allowing the music to carry his frustration and anger and every other pent-up emotion that he felt unable to express or control. Occasionally, he banged on the keys a few times, listening to the discordant noise and searching for the melody in it.

Or maybe you just want an excuse to hit something.

Autistic inertia carried him through the afternoon and into the evening, his mind continuously telling him to stop what he was doing and his body refusing to obey. By the time he finally managed to tear himself from the keys, his arms and fingers were near numb with soreness and his stomach made an inhuman noise that accompanied a sharp, yet brief, stab of pain.

Food.

Will sat at the piano for several minutes, telling himself every argument he could think of to spur movement out of his argumentative limbs. It was only when he told himself Hannibal will be disappointed if he comes home and sees you didn’t eat anything that he managed to force himself up and meander into the kitchen. He opened the refrigerator and stared blindly into it, looking for anything he could eat that required absolutely no effort.

Juice.

He grabbed the bottle and looked at the counter.

Fruit. Crackers.

It would have to do.

He carried the bottle of juice, the box of crackers, and a pear back to the living room, laying on the couch and staring at the ceiling. Getting the food together was one thing, but actually eating it was completely different. Eventually, he managed to get his knife out of his pocket and began cutting slices off the pear just to have something to do with his hands, then eating the slices just to get them off the knife. By the time he heard the front door open, he had barely touched the juice and he hadn’t opened the crackers at all.

Will listened for the usual sounds of Hannibal’s return home: he would remove his coat and his shoes in the front hall, he would put on his house shoes, he would put his keys in the dish near the door. But this time, he heard two more sounds: the low murmured tones of Hannibal’s voice, and a rhythmic clicking noise.

A very familiar rhythmic clicking noise, at that.

Will set his knife down and pushed himself up into a seated position on the couch. “Hannibal?” he called suspiciously, and immediately, the clicking sped up, growing louder and closer as it approached.

You know that sound. That’s a dog.

Will had barely gotten to his feet when a familiar coat of brown and white entered the room, the click of his paws on hardwood softening as he reached a rug. Immediately, Will’s heart caught in his throat, his eyes widening. “Winston…?!”

Their eyes met, and Winston barked with delight, running over to Will in a sudden frenzy. Will barely managed to fall to his knees before the dog reared up to put his paws on Will’s shoulders. A stunned laugh escaped him as Winston began trying to simultaneously crawl into his lap and turn circles around him, which led to him practically falling over multiple times. Will found himself truly smiling for the first time in weeks, his vision growing watery as the dog whimpered with excitement.

It wasn’t until he finally got Winston to calm down and was holding him, rubbing the side of his neck, that Will finally looked up. Hannibal was standing in the doorway, leaning against the wood of the jamb, his hand in his pocket and an expression on his face that Will could only describe as achingly fond.

Will reached up and rubbed at one of his eyes behind his glasses. He couldn’t stop smiling. “…you have dog fur on your slacks.”

“I’m aware,” Hannibal said without a trace of irritation or admonishment. “He gave me a very similar greeting, though nowhere near as enthusiastic.” A pause, and then, “I must feed both of you.” Before Will could voice a protest, he was disappearing towards the kitchen, already rolling up his sleeves to prepare for his work.

It was only once all three had eaten, the dishes were complete, and Winston was curled up on the rug in a heavy, exhausted sleep that Hannibal joined Will in their sitting room. Will was curled up in the corner of the couch, watching the rise and fall of the dog’s chest, but he tore his eyes away when his lover entered the room. Wordlessly, he extended his hand, and just as silently, Hannibal came forward. Once he sat, he tugged at Will’s hand, pulling the other man to his side.

They sat in silence for a long moment, one far more comfortable than that morning.

“I didn’t know how long it would take,” Hannibal confessed, answering an unspoken question. “I had to wait for both Molly and Walter to leave the house.”

Which meant that Hannibal had kept his promise. He hadn’t hurt them. They hadn’t even known he was there. Will tightened his grip on Hannibal, curling further into him. “…I told you that I hate surprises.”

He could hear Hannibal’s smile in his voice. “I know.”

“…thank you.”

Hannibal turned his head, pressing his lips into Will’s curls. “I know things have been difficult for you, Will,” he said, voice soft. “I know how hard it is for you to adjust to new environments, and I know how much you missed him. I thought you wouldn’t begrudge me a day of absenteeism and a little dognapping to rectify the situation.”

“I was mad at you for leaving.”

“I know.”

Will huffed out a quiet laugh and found himself smiling once more. “But you do have an infuriating habit of ignoring what I say I want and doing whatever you will anyway.”

“Are you going to tell me that it’s a good thing I have that habit and I should continue to indulge it?”

Will raised his head and found Hannibal looking down at him, his eyebrows raised just slightly. Will shook his head, then leaned forward to kiss him.

“Absolutely not.”

[autism-autobot]

Flower of a Poisonous Seed Part 8:

Part 7 (When the series had no title):

Wukong had become quite used to Nezha's loaned wheelchair and various other assisting devices (walkers, canes, crutches, etc.) but he still has not yet comfortable with using them in front of others.

When he met with the Demon Bull Family last week he didn't use any mobility devices even though he really needed it that day. Nezha understood his insecurities and supported his decision to not use them in front of others just yet. He went so far as to say that Wukong was feeling unwell and it was causing him a great deal of pain and difficulty moving, which wasn't untrue, he just left the part out of potentially needing a wheelchair.

Sun Wukong was sitting in a rollator when he lamented his anxiety towards using an assisting device in front of others, especially his elder brother and his family.

SWK: Honestly, Nezha? I don't think I'll ever be able to use any of these things in public! And that's when I tend to need them the most! My physical condition has only been getting worse since I moved in with you.

Nezha: *sighs* Indeed, it has.

SWK: ...

SWK: WAIT I DIDN'T MEAN TO SUGGEST YOU'RE MAKING THINGS WORSE, THAT WAS NOT WHAT I WAS TRYING TO IMPLY!!

Nezha: I know. I've just also been concerned with your health and if there are any outside influences that may be causing your condition to worsen.

SWK: Oh... phew. I thought I was making you feel bad about trying to help me for a second there.

Nezha: No, you remind me daily of how grateful you are for my help.

SWK: Well I am! Really, honestly!

Nezha: I know.

Nezha: You don't tend to get help from others very often, do you?

SWK: No, can't say that I do.

Nezha: Well, know that I am always here if and when you need me. I am always happy to help.

SWK: Thanks.

Nezha: Also, I believe I may have an idea of how we can go forward from here to try to get you back to full strength.

SWK: Okay, what'd you have in mind?

Nezha: We take you to a medical professional.

Never had Wukong felt a chill up his spine quite like the one that immediately followed Nezha's words just then. He must have gone pale too, since Nezha instantly became worried and insisted on laying Wukong down on the nearest sofa. It took less than a minute for Wukong to fall unconscious.

~~~

When Sun Wukong awoke, he had incense burning on the coffee table, a filled water bottle beside it, and a moist towel pressed against his head by an expertly gentle hand.

(Was incense burning Nezha's solution for all his ailments? He was a celestial after all, and it's kinda their thing. Wukong was too ill to consider the matter further.)

Nezha noticed Wukong coming back to consciousness, and started apologizing profusely. Wukong couldn't make out anything he was saying, but he also couldn't tell if it was because he just fainted or because Nezha was genuinely not speaking clearly enough for anyone to understand him. He hoped it was the latter.

Nezha suddenly pressed his forehead gently to Wukong's (with the towel still between them) and continued muttering apologies. Wukong tried to sling his arm around Nezha's neck to hug him.

Which resulted in him slapping them both in the face.

Nezha: Ow! Why did you do that?

SWK: Sorry! I ws tryna hg yuh.

Nezha: ....?

Nezha: Oh! You were trying to hug me!

SWK: Ya!

Nezha helped Wukong wrap his arms around him and gently cradled Wukong in his arms. After refreshing the moist towel, he attempted to help Wukong drink from the bottle. Wukong wasn't awake enough for that though, and spilled all over them.

Nezha cleaned up the mess, refilled the bottle and knelt back down beside Wukong. He didn't dare bring up the subject matter of medical attention again, but luckily once Wukong fully came to, he was more than willing to explain his unfortunate reaction.

~~~

Nezha could understand Wukong's reaction to that particular topic once he gave a brief synopsis of the history between human scientists, doctors, psychologists, and the experiments preformed on his people used for "furthering their understanding of the human mind and body".

It was a dark history to say the least.

He didn't even go into great detail, only surface level things he could mention without further exasperating himself.

~~~

Once the subject was dropped, Nezha could only do his best to make sure that Wukong's present condition didn't worsen.

But he can't just not have Wukong see a doctor.

He needed help. Even with his own chronic illness, Nezha still saw a doctor when things suddenly got bad.

But how was he supposed to get Wukong to see a professional when that's how he reacts to very idea of it? What was he to do?

Another problem that would have to wait until tomorrow. It's not like he could take him now. Wukong was still too unsettled and frail. Nezha could only sigh at the weight on his chest.

Another problem, another day.

Part 9:

Masterpost

[brokenpaladin]

10, 20, and 38! (I rolled a dice so I have no idea which ones these are 👀)

And A for the creator ask!

Oh boy, a fun selection!! This'll be long, hopefully I can put a read more here via mobile. Also, I'm gonna answer the creator one first,

A) Why are you excited about this character?

*drags over a chair* WELL I'M SO GLAD YOU ASKED. Though I guess an easier question would be what am I not excited about over Talis. I love him!! He's my boy!! He'll second-guess himself into the ground over something as simple as small talk, and he'll commit physical violence to protect a frightened stranger. He's convinced he's a terrible, foreboding presence and he gives off the biggest kicked puppy energy ever

He's seven feet tall and tries to stand as small as he can. He knits and mends to calm himself. If he stares at the sky too long he'll cry. He'll swear on his life to help someone get somewhere safely and he fully means it. He can't spend more than a few weeks traveling with someone before he's convinced he needs to leave for their own safety.

He once became a crux-point person in the change of power in an entire city, was nearly executed in another's place, and I'm not sure he realizes it. He befriended an injured owlbear. He's functionally homeless. He's absurdly powerful for a random forest stray living outside a town in the middle of nowhere, and he still will hire himself out as a day laborer in exchange for a meal

More seriously, he's become a very near and dear representation of an archetype I've always felt drawn to but never really sat down to extrapolate or write with abandon-- the self-sacrificing hero. The one who will put himself in danger to protect others. And specifically, the toll that takes, time and again, throwing yourself between another and cruelty you can't stop. The way it warps your thoughts and your view of yourself

And hopefully also how you learn to redirect that protective instinct into a healthy direction, how to grow and heal and value yourself again >:T But we're working on that bit

10. What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them?

I mean, tbh, everything haunts him-- he lets nothing go :') But the lie he tells most frequently, and actively, is probably about his own state or well-being. The simple regular ones, "I'm fine" and "it's nothing", the ones you tell to keep going. He doesn't think much of it, actually. He's sturdy and has survived worse, so to fuss over a bout of fear or a single wound feels painfully pointless

20. If they were asked to explain the difference between romantic and platonic or familial love, how would they do so?

Oof….. um, that would be a tricky one for our paladin lad. For you see, he's aromantic! He's never really felt a draw towards any particularly romantic relationship? But he's always been an affectionate, friendly lad, even as a kid, so growing up it was a little tricky to navigate-- he and his mom had many a long talk about how it felt weird when people made a big deal about holding hands, or how sometimes the way someone insinuated around him spending time with a friend felt uncomfortable. But she listened to his anxious talking over it, and helped him figure out that while he was fond of folk, he didn't feel drawn to them in a coupling sort of way-- just general affection or physical attraction, though he always got embarrassed to bring that up (I mean he was an absolute goob as a kid)

Now though, you're mostly just going to get a momentarily puzzled look and a shrug. He's not so talkative, these days

38. What memory do they revisit the most often?

Consciously, none. Or, he tries not to think on anything that has been, but he finds his memories of living in Neverwinter intruding most frequently when he's awake. For good or for ill, that was his safest and best home when he returned to the surface. He'll push those memories away as often as he can, because he doesn't think he has any right to miss his home there. He left voluntarily, after all. They would have kept him and looked after him forever, if he let them…

[fizzingwizard]

Credit where credit is due: I was thrilled to see this in my activity tab yesterday:

Tumblr makes so many tweaks and changes almost daily that it'd be impractical to roll this out for all of them. But for anything that might confuse or take users by surprise, I think using this more often would be great. It's so common on this site for me to open up Tumblr and find something just utterly different, and unless I think of wading through the Changes on Tumblr blog (which can be an ordeal if you didn't notice the change the day it was implemented) I'm just left to my own devices to guess why.

Now that that's over with.

I AM MISSING POSTS ON DESKTOP NOW. Before I thought it was just mobile. It seemed that on mobile, when lost of posts appeared while I was out or sleeping, Tumblr just wouldn't show the to me until I had reached the end of my dash, scrolled back up, refreshed, and scrolled through my dash again.

I did it for experimental purposes - to prove it was really happening - which is is - but I do NOT want to keep combing through my dash two or three times looking for stragglers. If it was just one or two posts, Idk, I guess I'd chalk it up to something with those posts or my connectivity. But it's been like ten missing posts a day. And that's my lowball number!! I'm doing my best to account for the possibility that I just didn't notice them on my first scroll. But that definitely doesn't explain all of them.

I figured it was to do with my data - because I normally have a long dash only when I'm on my commute to work, when it's been hours since I've last looked at tumblr, and all the chatty folk across the world who are awake while I'm asleep have been busy bees. So maybe it's too much for my data, plus I'm always on the train when I look at Tumblr and I lose connection every time we make a stop, lol.

But that can't be the case IF IT'S ALSO HAPPENING ON DESKTOP!!

I'm not a train right now! I'm at my apartment! My connection to the internet is the best it ever gets! It is wifi, but it isn't giving me any trouble on aaaany other website. Even Tumblr - when my wifi gets spotty, the picture become gradients, videos buffer forever, and I get shake my fist at the way loading ads is prioritized over loading you know the content I actually want to see.

Right now though my wifi is crystal clear, and Tumblr is working perfectly - except it's eating random posts!! Yes, I'm sure - once again there were too many for me to have just not noticed them all. My dash is long in the morning, but not TOO long. I deliberately follow only a handful of active users so that my dash doesn't overwhelm me.

Now that I think of it, I wonder if that's what's behind this? Maybe (I have no idea) it's common for people on tumblr to follow soooo many people it's impossible they'll keep up with all the posts on their dash anyway, so Tumblr just doesn't want to bother making sure everything shows up?? I don't know, I just know that that does NOT work for me. I use Tumblr because I want to see content posted or reblogged by people I follow. Also, being a very small blog myself, I don't like the idea that on the rare occasions I post something I actually care if other people see, that post might not even show up for anyone.

No idea if this is a bug or something purposeful but it's definitely happening. To me, anyway. Although, if it's happening to others as well, it makes sense they don't know because who scrolls through their dash TWICE?? The initial way I figured it out was because I saw a post I liked and forgot to Like it, so I scrolled again to find it... and found more than I was expecting :/

[kinetic-elaboration]

August 23: Good Day

Sometimes I think it honestly takes so little to make me happy and to turn around my mood, begging the question of why I am not always doing so little in that direction.

Today was a pretty good day. I think taking off from work an hour early yesterday (just an hour!) and taking a nap really helped. I was much more awake today. I accomplished a bunch of small, random things at work that I'd been avoiding dealing with and, unsurprisingly, they weren't that bad.

The crepe food truck was back and, against my better judgment, I had one. I didn't like the last one I had in the spring, but I remembered not liking the inside, so this time I had a nutella and banana, thinking, you can't go wrong with that. Also I miss crepes, my primary sustenance during my study abroad in Paris, and am thus always suckered into American crepes even though they are not as good and not the same. Anyway, suckered in yet again: I forgot that the crepe material itself was not to my liking. I ended up just pulling out the banana slices and eating them, about 3/4 of the way in. But, that's okay. I had a nice talk with K while we were waiting for our crepes, got to spend some more time outside on the nicest day we've had in a while*, and I supported a local business.

*Nicest day we've had in a while because noticeably cooler, but still 81. I died a little inside when the girl next to me by the crepe-mobile said it "felt like fall." Girl. It is a good 10 degrees too hot to be called fall. Please, love yourself.

After work I went to Food Lion for the first time in a while. I almost fell asleep on the bus but other than that, it wasn't a bad excursion. The cream cheese I like and can only get at the Food Lion was on a close out sale, which means I will probably never taste it again. But on the upside, I bought my first apple cider of the year and also this extremely cute Halloween bucket that projects a ghost from it, which is definitely meant for kids trick-or-treating but... ghost friend.

Then I stopped by the Starbucks, which was taunting me with fall drink advertisements even though fall drinks are not yet available. I desire them greatly, in a this-will-fix-me way. But I got cold brew that was very good and one of the baristas told me I looked really cute and she liked my skirt, which was just very kind because I've been sort of doubting my fashion lately and it made me feel better about that. (This is the second time someone has complimented one of my skirts at the Starbucks.)

I came home and did nothing much other than drink the coffee really slowly and screw around on the internet, but it felt nice. Forced myself to wash some dishes, even.

Anyway, it's pretty late now, so I might regret the dishes. I feel a lot better than I usually do on Wednesday and much better than I was expecting to feel after Monday. I'd love to get some writing done tomorrow although I don't have high hopes for it. We'll see.