#also love that silly little part where Kenny says: ‘be mine the same way I want to be yours.’

[purplepeptobismol]

War is over…

[queen-of-my-goofball-army]

Favorite Voice Actors

For those of you that know me, you know that my number one special interest is cartoons and the people that voice my favorite characters. Studying my heroes and watching them in interviews became a favorite pass time of mine. A lot of my friends thought that it was really weird and they stopped talking to me because of it. For a long time before I got diagnosed as having aspergers I talked forever about it. I think that both bored and confused people. For me, I love voice acting because anybody can be anything. You can watch a show and years later be like I know that voice it’s insert name here if you’re like me. True, certain actors have something that is brought to every character (I can think of one prime example later on down the list) but it is always about the heart that they put into their characters. 

10. Charlie Adler: I’ll admit that I am mostly a fan of him due to the amount of work that he has done and the quantity. This man was the voice of Cow, Chicken and Big Red guy in Cow and Chicken. True, this show was past my time (and if it wasn’t I feel like it would get the Fairly OddParents treatment where my parents would forbid me to watch it.) When I listened to his episode of Talkin’ Toons I found his story’s really interesting and compelling. I can only imagine how much work and effort went into all of his characters in that show. To develop one character is one thing but to be able to switch between them like a deck of cards is a completely different thing. I did however watch a lot of Brandy and Mr. Whiskers when I was younger!! Growing up with that show and hearing him play Mr. Whiskers brought me a lot of joy when I was sick at home and for that I will always be a huge fan of his voice and his work. 

9. Jim Cummings. If I were to say that one voice actor had a ton of versatility it would probably be him. I was a major Tigger fan when I was growing up. Not just that but I loved Raymond when Princess and The Frog came out. He is actually my mom’s favorite voice actor. But I also loved CatDog when I would see that on reruns, I grew to love Darkwing Duck and countless other shows that he leant his voice to. Studying voice acting and the people that do it has led to me finding some things out that I would rather not. Especially when I found that he wasn’t actually the nicest person in real life. But, to me that doesn’t matter when it comes to this list. He is here because so many of his characters made my childhood just a little bit happier. When I was thinking about favorite voice actors I considered two things, personality and character content. This one is here just for character content. 

8. Bob Bergen: I reblogged a post a long time ago with this man at the helm. What he can do every time I see him do it blows my mind. Bob has been the voice of Porky Pig since pretty much Tiny Toons back in the early 90′s. He has stated that there have been some others but when I think Porky this is the name that comes along with it. Watching him do his thing is something that continually blows my mind. Listening to his life story on Rob Paulsen’s podcast Talkin’ Toons is something that inspired me more than anything. It’s this story of persistence and resilience from a young age. He is one of the few voice actors that actually got to talk with Mel Blanc when he was fourteen. I love his genuine heart and the ability that he has to jump into his character full force. Porky was a big portion of my childhood and I grew up laughing at his “silly” stutter. It wasn’t until I got older and learned that the stutter is an actual art form that I learned something entirely different. 

7. Richard Horvitz: Most of you that know me might be surprised at this rather seemingly low placement for somebody that I greatly admire. I mean he was Invader Zim and Billy from Billy and Mandy for crying out loud!! I just bought a print for the man but really when I thought about it, he hasn’t really inspired me as much as my top six have. I love his sense of humor and his love of musical theater but he hasn’t taught me anything life altering. I think that he is hands down the funniest voice actor in Hollywood. I could listen to him make jokes forever and just talk in his voice but at the same time he is so other worldly and knows so much about the craft that it inspired me that way. He is as most of his fans joke “the dad voice actor” complete with dad jokes. I love Invader Zim so much, the show has helped me through a lot of loneliness and emotional moments in my life reminding me to keep laughing at life’s craziness. I also love Moxxie from Helluva Boss. All in all Richard is a fabulous man and actor. He has helped me figure out the kind of person that I wanted to be and I owe him a lot of laughter hours. 

6. Greg Cipes: Can I talk about probably my OG hero for voice acting? When I was six I spent a lot of time in front of the television watching the original Teen Titans. My favorite character was Beast Boy his character that he played. When I say that BB changed the way that I think about my life that is not an exaggeration. He was one of the first characters that made me laugh so hard my stomach hurt. Growing up I had to fight people for his validation. It seemed like nobody loved him as much as I did. Cut to me in middle school I’m a bit more grownup and I start channel flipping. I wind up on Nickelodeon and see the reboot of Ninja Turtles. I figure I’ll watch it and see what all the hype is about. I hear Mikey open his mouth and instantly I get this rush of my childhood coming back. It was one of the first times that I made the connection between voice actor and character. Greg taught me so much vicariously through his character. He taught me about fun and laughter, about the importance of feeling lonely doesn’t mean that you’re alone in the world and even if you’re the goofball that doesn’t mean that’s all you have to be. The fact that he is such a relaxed and genuine person only adds to the admiration of this vegan beach bum. 

5. Corey Burton: This is a very personal hero of mine. It’s one that I hold very close to me because of one thing. As far as I know, there have been very few voice actors on the autism spectrum. Corey is the only one that I have ever found. He’s the man that actually surpassed every expectation and said screw live performing it makes me anxious I’m going to get my experience through something that I know I’m good at radio. So he does radio and becomes really good at that. Then he goes to cartoons. He does Dale in Chip And Dale Rescue Rangers with a certain feminine icon of mine. He gets Ludwig Von Drake and has been that voice actor since the original DuckTales. Then he hits the peak, he was Mole in Atlantis Lost Empire a big budget Disney movie. I am so often inspired by my top six favorite voice actors. They are the ones that took me by the figurative hand and told me hey you can do get through whatever it is that you are struggling with. It just takes a little bit of laughter through the bad times, and an optimistic attitude that things will slowly but surely get better. Corey was the one that actually got himself to the top of the mountain and got to say that he did it. I admire that about him so much because for a while I thought to myself “Hey, he did it so can I”. 

4. J Michael Tatum: In terms of anime voice actors, even though I love a great many, only one has ever remained of legend status. It comes yet again with a rather personal story. I was 17, lost and a little bit confused. I knew that I was ace but I had no idea how to tell my parents. It was around this time when I was getting back into anime due to Yuri On Ice, Space Dandy and Princess Jellyfish. I decide what the hell I’m going to watch some panels of my favorite voice actors for anime haven’t done that since I was thirteen. I had always loved Tatum as Kyoya Ootori in Ouran High School Host Club and France in Hetalia but other than that I didn’t know very much about him. I looked up panels for him and came across one for Florida Anime Con filmed that year. In it, he talked about being gay a lot. It implanted a seed that would inspire me. If he could be out and proud then why was I stoping myself? It might sound silly or stupid to some but to me it changed everything. From that moment on I loved everything Tatum. It led me to discover my love for Rei in Free, Okabe in Stein’s Gate and many other countless roles of his. 

3. Tom Kenny: This man right here, he is the OG voice actor special interest of mine. He is the first name that I remember hearing because he did so much for Nickelodeon showing children how he did his most iconic voice. Who is that iconic voice you may ask yourself? Well it’s Spongebob flipping patties Squarepants. If that alone doesn’t put him at this spot then I don’t know what does. Like so many children in the early 200s I spent a good chunk of my childhood with me and my parents on the couch and this show on the television screen. You want to talk about legacy? This man voiced his way into the hearts of millions of children across the united states. I remember the first time I saw his actual face. I was flipping through channels and I saw this man on Nickelodeon. He had a goofy smile on his face and I figured what the hell I’ll give this a watch even though it’s not a cartoon. Then he started talking he introduced himself as Tom Kenny. Then he starts doing Spongebob. My five year old mind was blown. I never forgot his name ever since. Every time I would watch Teen Titans and Mambo would be on that episode I would be like “Oh that’s Spongebob’s voice actor”. It was that moment that changed everything for me. I have never looked back from my main special interest ever since. He has helped me through so much. Whether he be my favorite exorbitant yellow sponge, or Dog on CatDog, or Lazlo on Camp Lazlo part of me will always be with Tom Kenny. Keep making children happy Tom you’ve been doing a great job so far. 

2. Tress MacNeille: Hoo boy this is a big one for me. For those of you that haven’t ever been around here before and don’t know the name of my character on my icon her name is Dot Warner (the Warner sister) and this is her voice actress. I hope that she changes your life and inspires you as much as she has mine. When I was nine I had an incredible fourth grade teacher. She showed us Yakko’s Nations Of The World for geography class. She also encouraged us to watch the rest of the show because it was full of educational songs and humor. I went home that day with on thought in mind. I wanted to watch the rest of that series. I go home and I make one distinction, hey that Warner sister I can kind of talk like her a little bit if I try hard enough. It was a little bit harder back in those days and I talk a lot more like her now with the reboot out in the world. This is the first and only impression I can do. I can do Dot and that’s it. And to me that was what mattered I didn’t need to be able to do anybody else. There aren’t a whole lot of woman voice actress’s that can keep working. All we have is Tara Strong, Cree Summer and the one and only goddess Tress MacNeille. Tress has helped me out so much in my life. I have never been the most confident person alive but from a young age hearing her absolutely smack down the actors of her brother’s in the show (Rob Paulsen and Jess Harnell) something about that inspired me. It was around this point in my life that I learned I can speak my mind and just not give a hoot if anybody feels the same way that I do. I can make my opinions known to other people. I was sixteen when I made that discovery and Tress was there for me all the way cheering me on in her Dot voice.  I owe a lot to her and I wish that she was more active on social media so that I could have the opportunity to thank her for everything that she has done vicariously for me. 

1. Rob Paulsen: If you were surprised by this, we probably haven’t talked before. At least not extensively because my dog do I love this man!! He has inspired me more than any other and he is not just my favorite voice actor but I consider him my ultimate hero in life. Where do I even start with him? There have been so many moments where I’ve fallen in love with one of his characters. I suppose one should start at the beginning. As I mentioned with Tress, my introduction through Animaniacs was Yakko’s Nations Of The World. This moment it changed everything for me because this was the first time that I could actually remember seeing Rob do a role. Yakko was the first cartoon character to actually make an impact on me. It was the first time that I ever loved a character that deeply. It was also the first time I ever made my own character to pair up with a canon character not even knowing that I was doing it. Ever since then a part of me has known okay that’s what Rob talks like. Now thanks to Tom Kenny I can recognize him in other places. And recognize him I did. From there I found that he was Carl on Jimmy Neutron, Mark Chang my favorite character on Fairly OddParents and countless other roles that we could be here all day for. As I mentioned, I was in middle school when the 2012 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were originally airing. When I watched that first episode, Donatello sounded really familiar to me. So I waited to the end credits only to find out that holy hell that was Rob!! The same person that played my favorite fast talking older brother. I found out about his fight with cancer a few years after it happened. This is when he went from favorite voice actor to hero legend status. He fought his way out of hell so that he could continue to sing “United States, Canada, Mexico, Panama, Heidi, Jamaica, Peru” until the end of his days. Reading his book changed my life forever as it gave me insight to not just the man who made me laugh, cry and cry laughing listening to his podcast but that same man had a whole ass heart and soul that he put into every character that he did. I find it really hard to explain what he means to me. He’s my hero, the one that made me laugh when I was a sad and lonely elementary schooler and the one that continues to bring me back to my childhood every time I see him in a show. I don’t feel the compulsion to give strangers hugs very often but if I ever met Rob I don’t think that I would be able to stop myself from giving a hug and just telling him thank you. Thank you for making my childhood and the childhoods of countless others much better than they would have been without you. 

And that’s it folks!! Whew that’s a lot of me rambling but I feel a bit better now. Finals preparation week has officially started for me and I just wanted to give myself this big ol’ boost of serotonin before I went into it.     

[thesinglesjukebox]

FULL TAC FT. LIL MARIKO - WHERE'S MY JUUL??

[6.11]

Do we choose rule, or do we choose suck?

Alex Clifton: Juuls. Juuls. Juuls. Oh my god, Juuls. [7]

Katie Gill: It's a little bit telling how all the comments on the YouTube video are comparing this song to other meme songs and not talking about the merits of the song itself. Still, there will always be a place in the world for meme songs that are serviceable memes but less than serviceable songs that teenagers can obnoxiously quote on the bus. "Where's My Juul" fits that niche perfectly. I expect a fleet of TikToks featuring people lip-syncing to this and will be very disappointed when this inevitably doesn't happen because I am out of touch with the youth. [6]

Kalani Leblanc: I can see there's already an abundance of blurbs submitted for this song, and the number will have risen by the time I finish this. After thinking so hard about how to go about being the fifteenth person to say "It sounds like "Shoes"," I'm realizing it's not really "Shoes" anyway. While they're both jokes that bear a resemblance in the thrash of a breakdown, "Where's My Juul??" is also listenable. The comparison is getting tired because it's like did anyone listen to "Shoes"? As a song? In earnest??? While this is not an entirely impressive piece, no concerto or FKA Twigs production, it's enough. Since 2006, we've been making everything into jokes, so it makes perfect sense. Nicotine-induced freakouts would've been the subject of an after school special ten years ago, but now they're joke material for hypebeasts and others on Twitter. Lil Mariko makes an impressive case while trying to find her Juul; I can't find anything this song did wrong, sorry. [8]

Will Adams: The mid-song 0-to-11 ramp is what takes this past the mean-spiritedness of "#Selfie" and the meme-spiritedness of "Phone" into effortless "Shoes"/"Let Me Borrow That Top" absurdity. The Juul is a placeholder; sub in any other monosyllabic cultural artifact, and Lil Mariko's rage against Full Tac's electroclash-y beat would cut through just as effectively. "Sorry, guys!" she says at the end, except there's nothing to apologize for. [7]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: I wrote 20 pages about Juul culture in 2018 so I should in theory be the exact target audience for this. Yet "Where's My Juul??" doesn't really click for me. It's charming and funny in parts (Lil Mariko's spoken verses, which transmit nervy anxiety and barely restrained fury effectively) but the hook, which takes up most of the very long minute-forty-five, is comedy via brute force principles: repeat a phrase enough and it will transfigure into a joke. [5]

Brad Shoup: About as funny as the related TikTok meme, though not as menacing, surprisingly. I wish so badly that Full Tac had gone full hardcore -- or even brostep! -- but am glad that Lil Mariko's Danny Brownian ad-libs and sudden reversals grind "#SELFIE" into the dirt. [7]

Oliver Maier: I need not catalogue the myriad ways in which this is transparently designed to blast off on TikTok -- you would probably know better than me -- but that cynicism detracts from "Where's My Juul??" for me. There's none of the spontaneity or sense of genuine fun that animates certain other genre-agnostic, threat-spewing, extremely online weirdo duos, more savvy than it is genuinely silly. It's not badly executed, but I felt like I got the picture before even hitting play. [4]

Will Rivitz: I get this is supposed to be more meme than song, but I so wish it had leaned into the latter for more than half its runtime. The "FUCK!!!" at the beginning of its second chorus is worth at least a [7] on its own, and its redlining nu-metal production is such a tight fusion of XXXTENTACION's sonic fingerprint and simplified TikTok trap that I'm surprised the "oh my God" ad-libs aren't followed by a "Ronny." As it stands, "Where's My Juul??" and its just-a-little-too-long interludes that grate after listen number four or so functions as a sort of "Thrift Shop" for the current day, a track defined by its novelty that we as an Internet music-Twitter hivemind all agree was genuinely good about five years after it's exited the public consciousness. It deserves more. [8]

Ian Mathers: Both less musically compelling and with less of a point than "Can I Get a Box?". [5]

Katherine St Asaph: It's kind of amazing how it took seven years for Rebecca Martinson to release her debut. [1]

Nortey Dowuona: Lil Mariko is actually kinda weird in the lol so random funny way that people think that [insert overrated white comic who had a Comedy Central show] is and has a really great metal screaming voice. I don't know who made this dull approximation of Kenny Beats and Pi'erre Bourne, nor do I care. Lil Mariko will hopefully get a recurring cameo role on Nora From Queens and get her own show from that. [5]

Mo Kim: The best joke here is the escalation of nonchalance (hey, where's my Juul?) into something desperate, and therefore dangerous: it hits like the drop in a rollercoaster when Lil Mariko finally breaks out the deep-throated metal screams, but the moment wouldn't have half the thrill without the masterful way she gradually ups the heat on the song's first chorus before that. Both of her spoken monologues, where she merges Valley Girl affect with murderous menace, only sweeten the deal. [8]

Ryo Miyauchi: "Where's My Juul??" gets spiked with an infectious dose of adrenaline when it suddenly turns a lot more aggro than you'd expect from a meme-y cross-section of Rico Nasty's mosh-pop and PC Music's ironic bubblegum. The demented beat stings with a pungent metallic sourness, and while her Valley Girl accent scans as an obvious put-on, Lil Mariko's blood-curdling scream is legitimately hair-raising. The song rapidly combusts, ensuring the joke doesn't overstay its welcome. [7]

Joshua Lu: Yes, hearing the unassuming Lil Mariko scream and snarl over a missing Juul is intrinsically funny, especially accompanied by a music video that knows exactly how to push the limits of its concept. But the real strength of "Where's My Juul??" lies in its sheer relatability. The title could be anything -- where's my wallet, my phone, my eraser -- because anyone who has ever misplaced anything can relate to the escalating panic and rage in not only the cataclysmic vocals, but also Full Tac's discordant production. Also crucial to the song is its sense of plot, as it steadily progresses from confusion to blame to outright violence. The ending, though predictable (Lizzo used the exact same twist not that long ago), is a necessary denouement, as it provides the moment where everyone involved can look back on the last minute and a half of chaos and laugh. [8]

Iain Mew: As a song structure trick, I love the fake-out final verse, those ones that seem like something slowly developing before the artist brutally cuts it off for the chorus or instrumental to come back stronger than ever; the "Don't Speak" and "Your Best American Girl" kind of thing. The key moment of "Where's My Juul??" comes in taking that same trick to a ludicrous, brilliant extreme. It has a drawn-out, jittery verse, a cartoon scowl of a chorus, and then one question into verse two it veers straight into swearing, screaming and fucking everything up. That's perfect enough that it would ideally be even shorter than it ends up. [7]

Kylo Nocom: Full Tac and Lil Mariko do in less than two minutes what took Justice five. The gimmick is the least fun part, and judging by my sample size of BigKlit's "Liar" and Full Tac's very own "CHOP" the producers behind this might not even be as funny as this video would imply. But I've long settled with music that's good on the merits of just being fun; when the production here is layered with discordant guitar sampling, analog drum kits, and distant screams of "piss!" and "fuck," I'm willing to buy into the ugliness. [8]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: Full Tac returns with another take on "Liar," succeeding because the goofy conceit here finds an appropriately goofy (that is, unexpected) vocal performance. Part of the appeal is how "Where's My Juul??" could sit comfortably alongside songs from Rico Nasty and Rina Sawayama, but has the appeal of shoddy viral videos from yesteryear. It's that "Kombucha Girl"-type reaction it's striving to elicit, and it accomplishes that as soon as the screaming starts. The best detail, though, is the most subtle: the moment Lil Mariko stops herself from saying "who" and politely asks "have you seen it?" [7]

Michael Hong: Have you ever been dragged to a party only for your only friend to disappear, leaving you to mingle with a group of people you don't know? And one person makes a comment so absurd that you just giggle along with the rest of the group even though you're not really sure if they're layering their statement with even a hint of irony or if there's something much more unsettling lurking underneath? But the jokes are getting more and more uncomfortable and suddenly fewer people are laughing along, instead furtively glancing across each other with an exasperated look as if to say "is this person for real?" And instead of backing away, that person instead starts doubling down, getting more and more aggressive, screaming across the room for what feels like hours and surely people must be ready to head out. Instead, when you finally catch a moment to glance down at your phone, you find that only two minutes have elapsed since you arrived and you realize that not even a quarter of the time has passed before your ride will come and you can leave this godforsaken party. You have absolutely no choice but to continue standing in the group in discomfort, waiting for this moment that feels like an eternity to finally finish, with the only background noise being the stereos blaring what sounds like someone's first attempt at using GarageBand. [0]

Crystal Leww: While I was digging through "likes" on SoundCloud, I noticed that a friend of mine had liked "Baby Let Me Know" by Full Tac, which sounds like the synth heavy dreamy pop that was popular at the beginning of last decade. I did not stick around for "Where's My Juul??" so imagine my surprise today when I turned this on and it's umm, screaming. A consistent genre as an essential part of an up-and-coming artist's brand is less essential than ever, especially in an age where (waves hands) dance music has eaten itself alive in its swirling storm of troll energy. Chaos in and of itself is a brand -- from 100 gecs to Alice Longyu Gao's dueling sister tracks "Rich Bitch Juice"/"Dumb Bitch Juice" to any DJ Bus Replacement Service set, it has fully infiltrated dance music. How this goes from sweetly threatening to full-on psychotic and back to cutely apologetic is chaotic so yes, I think Full Tac could make some noise (both in creating a fanbase and also like literally) with this. [8]

[Read and comment on The Singles Jukebox]

[uas-art]

Title: A Visit Summary: Mysterion drops in to pay Leopold Stotch a visit. Rating: G Ships: N/A Other: Contains implied/mentioned child abuse. Set in a superhero AU

You can also read this one a03

~~~~~~

He would have rather slipped through the window and snuck up on him. It would have been like old times. Leo probably would have gotten a laugh out of it. Unfortunately, Doctor Timothy had insisted Mysterion enter the mansion properly through the front door as a show of trust.

The butler did not seemed all that surprised at the caped vigilante standing in the doorway. Mysterion didn't even need to flash his Freedom Pal's badge for the man to step aside and usher him in.

"The Master is in his study. Would you like me to lead you there, or would you prefer to sulk through the shadows there yourself?" The butler asked in a less than joking tone. Mysterion didn't answer, instead purposefully walking past into a ray of sunlight cast by a near by window.

The butler must have been one of Leo's old hires. Mysterion wouldn't have been too surprised if the butler hadn't been on the receiving end of one of his attacks back in the day. Most of Leo's personal staff use to members of the Chaos organisation that Leo quickly rebranded and name changed to keep them out of jail.

The butler shut the door and wandered off, leaving Mysterion to his own devices.

In the past, when Mysterion snuck into the mansion, he had to keep close to the walls and duck in and out of doorways to avoid being detected. He would use his unworldly powers to slip from shadow to shadow and distract servants and guards. Now, however, he marched up the large set of stairs and down the hall as if he were a member of the household.

Finally, Mysterion came to a large door. He reached up and rapped his knuckles against the hard wood three times in set rhythm, two quick knocks, a pause, then the final knock.

The over-excited sound of footsteps hurried to the door before it swung inwards.

Leopold Stotch looked at Mysterion with a wide, almost goofy-looking, grin. Green and red paint smeared across his cheek and a streak of navy blue across his forehead with a whole rainbow of oil paint on his artist's smock. His eyes even seemed to sparkle with joy at seeing the hero.

It was hard to imagine this baby-faced man was ever one of the most feared and wanted men in all the United States less than two years ago.

Leo jumped back. "Mysterion, come in, come in! It's so good to see you, buddy! Do you want some tea? One of my staff just brought some, and it's got extra honey and lemon."

"No, but thank you," Mysterion shook his head as he entered the study.  He glanced around. It had been a year and a half now since he, Tupperwear, and Toolshed had come in and removed all the machines and weapons and monitors. Now the walls were lined with stacks of canvas and shelves with jars of paint brushes, chalks, crayons, and all other assortments of art supplies. A single TV was affixed to a wall in the corner with the weather channel playing.

Leo grabbed hold of Mysterion's arm. The hero let himself be tugged along towards an easel. The before mentioned tea sat steaming on a small table next to it.

"You have to see my latest painting." Leo took the canvas from the easel and held it in front of him. Pride beamed from his face. The piece in Leo's hand was a mess of colors and different textures, greens and blues and whites, and Mysterion couldn't for the life of him tell what it was suppose to be or if that was the point.

Mysterion frowned. He didn't grow up in a house hold that really appreciated the finer things, modern art being one of them. The closest thing he could recall print of Jesus in a fancy frame his mother had gotten from some free store or another.

"Its...nice." Mysterion commented. "I like that...green diamond pattern."

Leo laughed. "Ok, you just gotta see it with the others, silly!" He ran past Mysterion and began to pick out some other canvases. As he set them next to each other on the floor, a picture began to appear before Mysterion's very eyes: an emerald dragon nestled among the clouds over looking a castle and forest.

Mysterion whistled, impressed. "You painted all this?"

"Yup!" Leo grinned. "Took a while to figure out what parts to put where, but I did it!" He stepped closer to Mysterion. "I'm donating it to a children's hospital next week. Think the kids will like it? Or is the dragon too scary?"

"They'll love it," Mysterion replied softly.  

The two stood in silence. Mysterion gazed at the paintings, trying to take in the smaller details Leo had hidden. So far he found a blue birds nest in the trees and a little family walking along a path towards the castle.  As he gazed upon the blue-grey stone of the castle, Mysterion noticed a figure in the tower window. Careful not to disturb the paintings, he walked around to get a better look.

"Is that...?"

"Yup." Leo joined him and crouched. "It's Charlotte. I saw her on the news recently." He reached out and gently brushed his fingers over the woman in the window with a heavy sigh.

Charlotte had been his fiance, until he was finally arrested for his villainous crimes. At first, she had stayed with him, proclaiming Leo couldn't be Professor Chaos, that he was being framed, but soon the constant media attention and rumors finally drove her away. The last Mysterion had heard of her was from an interview she gave saying that she hoped Leo got the help he needed.

Leo fell back on his heels. "Hey, Mysterion, can I, um, ask you a question?"

"Of course," Mysterion replied.

Leo rested his head on his knees, not looking up at the hero. "Do...do you think it'll ever be enough? Will I finally stop feeling guilty for all I've done one day or is this," he paused to gesture to the paintings, "all for nothing?"

Mysterion pursed his lips before going down to his knees. He placed a hand on Leo's arm but didn't speak.

"Sometimes," Leo whispered, gripping his legs, "I wish they just had thrown me in jail. I wish my lawyers weren't as good. I hate them for that." He gritted his teeth. "I hated how they played up how badly my parents treated me and made me cry at the stand. I hated how they kept acting like the doctor who said I had dissociative identity disorder was right when I know he was a lair." Bitterness seeped into Leo's words. "I ain't got D.I.D.. Chaos isn't another personality of mine that I didn't know about. He is me. I am him. We both deserve to be punished for everything we did."

Mysterion reached out and pried Leo's hand off his leg before he hurt himself.

"I know, Leo." Mysterion said, slowly. "But maybe there is something to all that. Not that you have D.I.D., but that maybe you and Chaos aren't the exact same person." At this, Leo swung his head around and met Mysterion's eyes.

Mysterion took a breath and chose his words carefully. "The Professor Chaos I knew always owned up to being a villain. He never denied that what he was doing was against the law but, he always said he shouldn't be punished for it. Chaos said he was doing the world a favor. That it was the lack of chaos in our society that made us so lazy and sedentary." He squeezed Leo's wrist. "He didn't feel any guilt for what he did. But you, Leo, you do. That's how I know you two aren't the same. Professor Chaos is gone. He's dead, and he's not holding you back from your growth like he's done for years. Do you understand?"

Leo swallowed. A layer of moisture covered his eyes, and he had to blink from tearing up. After a moment, Leo blew his nose against his smock and turned back to the painting.

"You know, there is another person I know in this painting." Leo leaned forward and grabbed a canvas from the middle. He sat back on his bottom with the canvas propped up against his knees. It was part of the scene of the sky and clouds. He turned the painting towards Mysterion.

"Can you see him?"

Mysterion narrowed his eyes, scanning the painting. After a moment, he pointed. "There?" He asked. It looked like a person, a child, sleeping, their head resting against the dragon's foot. The child's hands rested over their stomach with a peaceful expression on their face.

Leo nodded.  "Yeah, he's...an old friend of mine who passed away a long time ago." He pressed his fingers against the canvas. "He died at the hospital this is all going to. The doctors tried all they could to save him, but it couldn't be helped." Leo shook his head. "I hated seeing him waste away like he did."

Mysterion pursed his lips. After a heartbeat, he asked, "What's his name?"

Leo sighed. "His name was Kenny. We were only nine, and get he was diagnosed with muscular dystrophy."

Mysterion took in a sharp breath that caused Leo to look towards him with a concerned expression. He coughed into his hand. "Sorry, I...someone very close to me passed from that same thing. I know how hard it is."

Leo's expression soften, and he turned back to the painting. "I'm sorry I brought it up then."

"Don't be. People get sick, and people die, that's...that's just how the world works."

Unless they’re me, Mysterion added to himself. He pushed the thought and the guilt away. Until he finally joined Freedom Pals and started to live full time at the estate, he had been faking his death and relocating himself over and over. It had been the only way to keep everyone he cared about safe from his growing rogue gallery. His drawn out battle with muscular dystrophy had only been the first.

'Kenny' needed to die for 'Mysterion' to raise.

For split second, the truth pressed against Mysterion's teeth. He had to swallow to keep the words from escaping. Leo didn't need to know about their shared past. It would only hurt him more.

"Heya, Mysterion." Leo whispered, almost inaudibly, "Think they would let me take flowers to his grave? Or would that break my parol?"

Mysterion let out a shake breath he prayed Leo didn't notice. "I'll see if I can pull some strings and let you go, even if I have to escort you there myself."

Leo's eyes grew wide. He stared at Mysterion. He didn't try to blink the tears away this time.

"Thank you, Mysterion."

~~~~

AN: This was for a gen challenge from a facebook group but i misread the information and this doesn’t meet the criteria, so yeah its just a normal fic now. Also, the wiki mentioned Butters is really artistic, and I'm sad that doesn't get brought up much. :(

[weirdwariii]

My Top 20 Albums of 2017 Part 2: 10 - 1

10. Alvvays - Antisocialites: What a delightful album. Like, I should just leave it at that, because I’m not sure what else I want to say about it. This is just the kind of indie pop-rock album that felt plentiful and unavoidable 10 years ago, but doesn’t show up as much anymore. But I don’t think its noteworthy just because it’s filling a niche. It’s just an effortlessly tight album. It sounds good, the vocals are great, the songs are amazing. There’s hints of some interesting inspirations sprinkled throughout (someone was listening to Stereolab…), and I just can’t get enough of it. I wouldn’t be surprised if, in the longrun, this album has some more longevity than most of the other albums on this list.

9. Thundercat - Drunk: Let me start here: I picked up this album on vinyl this year, and it’s one of the coolest looking packages to come out this year; great cover art, lots of art inside, and...the album spread across three 10” discs. To get through the album on vinyl you need the steadfastness to flip three different discs after each side, and to put away each disc and replace it with the next at least twice. That’s a lot of commitment for any album, and the very thought of listening to this album on vinyl exhausts me (considering that my turntable is located on the opposite side of the room from my couch). With that said, I’m pleased to announce that I love this album, despite its presentation. I feel like this is the third year in a row that Thundercat has felt like an important part of important music (see also: To Pimp a Butterfly, You’re Dead! and The Epic), and its good to see that its own name on the cover of his work this year. This is an album that feels uniquely his, and somehow makes a song about watching anime in Japan seem as much of an artistic accomplishment as making the best yacht rock song in 30 years with the help of Michael McDonald and Kenny Loggins. The entire album is an equal parts quirky and soulful trip and hints that future albums could be even quirkier and more soulful. Just, like, listen to it digitally.

8. Rolling Blackout Coastal Fever - French Press EP: So what does this say: For a 6-song EP, these songs must be exceptional if it was better than all those other albums? Or that, as an EP, there’s less of a chance to be bored with it by the end? Well, for what it's worth, this is the only EP on the list, so it clearly did something right. Honestly, if this was at LP length and was 10 songs at the same quality as the 6 presented here, this would probably rank even higher. As is, this is just a breezy and effortless set of indie rock songs from a new band that sounds like they’ve been around 10 years longer than they really have. There isn’t a moment that goes to waste, and I’m always left wanting more at the end - a quality that even some of my favorite albums this year didn’t have. I sincerely hope there’s a full length on the horizon, and that it makes good on the promises hinted at here.

7. Oh Sees - Orc: Sometimes there’s just the perfect album at the perfect time. Maybe its a band that you’re finally getting into as they put out a new album, or maybe it's an album that just seems to mesh with the kind of music you’ve been into lately. Maybe it's an album that just resonates with how you’re feeling in that moment.  Sometimes it's all of the above, as was the case here. I finally got into Thee Oh Sees last year, absorbing their two albums in my quest for more music that was in the same vein as Ty Segall’s Emotional Mugger. Between these albums, and King Gizzard’s 2017 output (we’ll come back to that), I was 100% on board the fuzzed out psych-garage-punk bandwagon, and that's when this album fell into my lap. I just love everything about this album. It’s raw, it’s weird, it’s loud, it has the most epic drum solo I’ve heard all year on it. My garage-rock sensibilities were spoiled silly this year, and this album played a huge part in that.

6. Japandroids - Near to the Wild Heart of Life: I read a review earlier this year for this album, and I’m kind of paraphrasing from memory, but it essentially said: “In a trying year like 2017, you’d think a band like Japandroids would have more to say on that, rather than making more fun punk music.” And that literally made me love the album even more. The best response to the darkness of our world, as it turns out, was to remind you of what it looks when you make it to the light at the end of the tunnel. The band doesn’t necessarily do anything they haven’t done before - there are few risks or moments that would sound completely out of place on an earlier album. But they really are great fucking songs. The title track is, hands down, the best song that was released this year. Yeah, maybe this didn’t call our orange meat puppet a buffoon or anything, but it sure as hell will be playing on my headphones on the day that we wave goodbye.

5. Washed Out - Mister Mellow: As we approached the end of 2016 and with the mostly unknown, but likely dark, void of 2017 looming ahead, I vowed to make art more important in my life. It needed to be an escape just as much as a response. And when I felt overwhelmed by the news cycle, or when the inspiration I needed just wasn’t there, Mister Mellow was. Between the “visual album” aspect of this project (that I strongly urge you to check out) and the music itself, it completely fit in with my aesthetic as artist and never failed in giving me a little pep talk. It's not a long album, nor is it an especially deep one. But in terms of style and just being a pool of strangeness to get lost in, this album never let me down. It might not be an explicit reaction to 2017 in itself, but it definitely aided me in creating my own.

4.Tyler the Creator - Flower Boy (or probably, Scum Fuck Flower Boy): The genesis of Odd Future was a weird time for me as an aging fan of music. On one hand, here was this collective of talented young rappers churning out a near-constant stream of albums for free - a concept that was novel and exciting to follow. On the other, between fast-paced Twitter stream-of-thought and community in-jokes, Odd Future definitely felt like the exact moment that I felt like I was an old man who didn’t get what the kids were listening to. And through that, I followed Tyler from afar. He’s a funny guy who you’ve been able to watch mature, year by year, to someone who feels very much like a spokesperson for a generation (am I crazy for thinking this??). This album feels like his most personal, self-aware, and world-aware album in his career, and there’s a quality in the production and the songs worthy of that awareness.  I recognize the lack of hip hop music in my list this year, and that’s a very fair observation. My only excuse (and it is just an excuse) is that Flower Boy was just that hard to beat, for me.  I listened to this album a lot this year, and I found myself relating to some of Tyler’s own personal revelations.  

3. Father John Misty - Pure Comedy: Earlier this year, speaking to a friend of mine about this album, I was voicing my displeasure: “The album is just far too long and says far too much. I just feel like I’ll never have the energy to slog through the whole damn thing.” But, again, 2017. The world needed protest music, or at the very least, music that seemed to understand the world we now lived in. So I slogged through Pure Comedy and...it wasn’t a slog at all. Okay, sure. It’s long. It takes its time. But Josh Tillman GETS it. Its a bad, and darkly amusing, world out there, and he’s here to let loose about it. The album only got better through the year, with every single listen. Even the 13 minute “Leaving LA” centerpiece feels wholey essential, acting as almost an origin story for FJM as much as it's a state-of-the-union on Josh’s personal life. This album didn’t just grow on me this year, it came to feel absolutely essential.

2. King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard - Flying Microtonal Banana, Murder of the Universe, Sketches of Brunswick East, Polygondwanaland: Not only did it not seem right to pick just one album of the 4 (at the time of my writing this) albums released by KG&TLW this year, but it felt like there was a larger picture here that needed to be recognized. King Gizzard promised 5 albums this year, and of the 4 we got, not a single one disappointed. Not a single one felt like a weak link to me. Not a single one felt like a misstep or seemed inessential. In a year where albums from some of my favorite bands bounced off of me after a listen or two (sorry, Grizzly Bear), this one band somehow made 4 albums that I cared about and kept coming back to. Flying Microtonal Banana and Murder of the Universe were both instantly loveable. They feel right into the same psych-rock wormhole that Oh Sees had me traveling through - especially the latter, with its story-driven sections and spoken words just hit the spot in every way possible. Sketches didn’t resonate with me at first, admittedly, perhaps because of its vast difference in sound from Murder - but I came around on it quickly, and its jazz-leaning pop would actually become the second most listened to of the 4 albums (with Murder being 1st). Polygondwanaland, finally, felt like a singles compilation - a complete set of tracks that, while feeling a little disconnected from each other thematically, shows off everything the band is capable of as well as hinting at what could be on the horizon. I honestly can’t say enough good things about this band, nor can I recall the last time that a band’s entire aesthetic just resonated with me so much. And to bring such a great quantity of music (with equal amount quality) to the table was just...perfect.  Or, y’know, close to perfect. Because these albums are only #2 on the list.

1.  Priests - Nothing Feels Natural: Nothing Feels Natural was one of the first (if not the actual first) albums I fell in love with in 2017, and it felt like the album that all others would be measured against. And, for the most part, this album always felt like the best. There were times when other albums felt more important in a moment (Murder of the Universe and Flower Boy both immediately come to mind), but when the buzz wore off a little, I was always happy to come back to Nothing Feels Natural. Here, Priests nail both a cohesive sound, yet its done through an assortment of genres. The surf-rock of “JJ” (another contender for year’s best song), the spoken word punk of “No Big Bang” and the new wave of “Suck” all seem to be at contrast with each other on paper, but the entire album flows together effortlessly. The band is tight as hell, and for as much as I want to call them “punk” there just isn’t a lot of the discordant noise I’d associate with that label on this album. There’s a Spoon-esque attention to production on this album - everything feels planned and well thought-out and there’s barely any wasted moments. Musically, I think the album holds its own against almost any other that I’ve listened to this year. Yet, I don’t even think its the music that even puts it here in the top spot - that’d be the lyrics. You’re probably as sick of hearing about the influence 2017’s politics had on music as I am sick of writing about it, so I’ll try and condense it a little...but you get the idea. For songs written prior to the year, they certainly hit all the right spots for the issues that mattered in 2017: Identity. Feminism. Consumerism. Culture. Even if it would’ve been the right album at any time, it still felt especially poignant this year, and the fact that it sounds so great only propelled it the very top.

And that’s it. That was my favorite music of this year. All done. The end. Onwards to whatever black hole of despair 2018 will be.

[andysrhythmicregression-blog]

Young Caucasians Soundcloud playlist

https://soundcloud.com/user-405314491/sets/young-caucasians/s-roJuO

The Young Caucasians 1980-1989

Matt Hahn- Vocals

Judd Lees- Guitar

Andy Kaulkin- Keys, Guitar

Jerry Hergenreder- Bass

Bill Kalish- Drums

also:

Ted Vanderclute: Vocals; Jack Lees: Drums; Bob Bullock: Bass; Go Go Tim: Rapping & percussion; Mark Philips: Guitar

Albums:

Pop Quiz- 1983;  The White Stuff- 1986; The Shroud Of Elvis- 1987

The Young Caucasians was my band from '79 or '80 until '89 when we split up and i moved to LA.

The band was started by myself and guitarist Judd Lees with his brother Jack on drums and a really interesting bass player named Bob Bullock and our good friend Ted Vanderclute on vocals.   Judd was a musical omnivore.  More-so than me, and very studious.  He was good at playing pretty much any style he wanted to.

We started out doing Grateful Dead and classic rock covers plus a lot of 60s r&b, which i was obsessed with, as well as some originals that were written by myself and lyricist, Andrew Ellen.  By the time we started gigging and recording, we had morphed into an r&b flavored 60s garage punk type of band with a bit of early rock and roll and more of a focus on originals.  

Right around this time, Andrew died in a car accident, but left me with stacks of lyrics that i continued to write music to for the next few years.  all the songs on this playlist up until the "white stuff" sessions are his lyrics.  After that the lyrics are mostly mine.

About the lyrics.  Lyrics were never supposed to be an important part of the band.  We knew Andrew was a talented lyricist, but I was not sophisticated enough to really pay attention to what he was writing about.  I was really only going off of the sounds of the words.  He is the one who got me into all the big lyric writers like Bob, Tom, Neil, Bruce, etc.... but, even though i loved those artists, i really only listened to them phonetically as well.  I didn’t really start taking it seriously until i started writing them, and even then it was a while before i started to understand it.  The point of this band wasn’t lyrics though.  it was about fun and energy and crowd interaction.  I talk about lyrics on this blog because the process of learning about them became important to me, and i feel self consious about my lyric writing in this band.   Listening back now, I really like Andrews lyrics a lot.  He died when he was 18 so they were all written by a teenager, but they were youthfully fatalistic, ambitious and passionate and actually fit what we were doing really well most of the time. Most of my lyrics in the band were way worse.

Around '82 we had a big personnel shift and the real band started coming together with the addition of Matt Hahn on vocals and Jerry Hergenreder on Bass.  Matt is a big personality and a great performer.  He created the personality of the band, which was really fun and energetic.  To me, he sang a lot like Buddy Holly (in the early days), which was very unique for this type of band.  Matt loved the Beatles.  Matt and I both loved the Ramones.

Jerry has a very natural musicality and had a great feel for r&b.  in addition to bass, Jerry wrote most of the background vocals and wrote songs for the band as well. He probably was the most tuned in with the funky stuff and we probably couldn't have done the Go Go as well without him.  Because of these guys, we were incorporating a lot of showmanship and flashy r&b cadences in the arrangements and got a reputation as a really great live band.

At this point, Judd had become a very serious guitarist and was deep into chuck berry, steve cropper, and roots music in general which is actually my favorite part of this music when i listen back to it now.  any actual toughness in our sound would definitely be attributed to him. He was probably the most professional player in the band as well.  on some of the live recordings he is the only one holding it down while the rest of us are flailing, caught up on our stage moves.

Jack was younger than us and was more into commercial hard rock, but he was a very accomplished drummer and his precision gave us a punky edge.

In my mind, we were The Ramones meets The Rascals, but the other band members brought their thing into it so that was really just a starting point.

Our Pop Quiz ep was made half with this band and half with a new drummer, Bill Kalish, who was an NRBQ fan and brought a little of that looser vibe into the band.  Jack was great, but we wern’t really his taste in music, and Bill ended up fitting in with us really well.

the song "Natalie" from pop quiz got played a lot on local radio station called WHFS, and we started doing really well at our gigs and playing out of town more.  Local promoters liked us and we opened for a lot of national touring bands including multiple shows with bands like the Fleshtones and The Ramones (5 times!).  We were a smaller band in the same scene as local heroes, The Slickee Boys, Tru Fax and The Insaniacs, and The Insect Surfers, to whom we were sort of the little brother band.  In fact Pop Quiz was on the same label as the Surfers, Wasp records, owned by local record store owner, Bill Asp.

I think this is when we were at our best.  we were a fun, goofy band and in addition to club gigs, we got invited to play at a lot of schools and dances.  We were very proud of our live show and always working on it.   The originals were catchy, but we also knew a lot of old r&b tunes and we enjoyed winning over tough crowds.

Around this this time, a local studio offered us free studio time to make our next album thinking that being associated with us would bring them business...big mistake!  we took forever and never finished the record.... i included a couple from this session (unmixed).  there were actually a bunch of good songs from this period but unfortunately the recordings are lame and wimpy.  We probably should have released it anyway.  This was the last of Andrew’s lyrics and sort of the beginning of the end of the band. First of all, this is the point that i started writing lyrics which weren't very good.  a lot of word vomit….nothing to say…swaying from portentous to silly and back...  But even worse, this is when i started taking myself seriously as a songwriter and started wanting the band to be taken more seriously.... without the actual songs to back it up, of course.  I started playing guitar more live with the band because i was writing on the guitar, and the band was getting less fun. Also, the focus on lyrics and the switch to writing on the guitar made the music simpler and less distinctive than the earlier stuff.

  Luckily, while this was happening, we stumbled into the DC Go Go scene where we had a lot of fun playing those kind of shows.  There was a guy named Kenny Marshall that i worked with at a record store who introduced me to the scene and he was in the band for a short while.  Kenny was a good rap writer and he wrote the rap in “Right On Time” He also introduced us to Go Go Tim, who was a really talented mc and percussionist.  Tim was actually in the band for a while and played on our 2nd ep, The White Stuff, which included one of our attempts to mix gogo and rock&roll, the very catchy but ridiculous, “Right On Time”.  It’s a dumb song but it was popular at our shows and got played on our cool local radio station.  It may have been the first lyric i ever wrote.  Its literally random rhyming words and phrases put together with no meaning.  Another early song that i now think was much better than Right On Time was “Your My Reason”.  I think i was trying to write like Andrew, but was ultimately embarrassed by it’s earnestness so I didn’t want it on the album. Instead, we had a bunch of songs that made no sense.  I have a hard time listening to this album because of the words,  but i included some of the songs because we were definitely trying some new things musically.  Its a little more “professional” and “accomplished” than Pop Quiz. For better or worse, we were evolving.

I should also mention that before we recorded the White Stuff, we had an unfortunate episode where we worked with a pop producer and recorded some of these songs with really slick, un-listenable production.  The only redeeming value of these recordings is that the version of Right on Time features Kenny doing his own rap in that classic 80s broadcaster style.  i still couldn’t stomach putting it on the playlist.

Live, the Go Go thing was pretty awesome.  We did some crazy gigs, like the time we opened for Trouble Funk and r&b star, Shannon at a football stadium at North Carolina A&T for thousands of people.   We had a lot of cool experiences that were way outside of the scene we came up in and it really kept things interesting on the surface.

Unfortunately, as a rock band, we were getting more unfocused. The next record, “The Shroud of Elvis” is sort of all over the place…. some stones-y rock with the 2 guitars….some awkward attempts at a funk rock hybrid,  some really portentous songs, but some good ones.  I was listening to a lot of Television, Clash, Velvet Underground, Husker Du, Replacements...None of it really fit in with the Go Go stuff the way our earlier music had.  Having said that, the band was playing really well at this point, especially Judd.  Some of these tracks did come out pretty good.  In particular, I Don’t Love You, which is a total stones rip off, but is still kind of clever and catchy.  I also included Real Things which is closer to the stuff i was doing on my own, but the band and Matt sound great with it.

Judd quit at some point after that and was replaced by a guy named Mark Philips.  He was younger, more from a punk/post-punk background and, listening back, did not fit our sound as well as Judd.  I have some recordings with him, but i didn’t include them because they sounded really forced and the songs were also pretty bad.  

We did end up back in the studio one more time in 88 or 89 before the band finally broke up.  We did a lot of straight up go go in our shows but never recorded any, so we wanted to do that, and that is “This Joint Is Bumpin”…. i actually think it came out pretty good, for what it is, and was in the spirit of our early stuff in its own way.

I don’t remember exactly how and when the band broke up, but i think it was late ’88; early ’89.  I spent most of 89 working on my own music and i moved to LA at the end of that year.  

I hadn’t really much thought about the Young Caucasians (or my own music from that time)  since my life took other directions in the mid ‘90s  The band existed before i fell in love with chicago blues, or delta blues, or Erroll Garner, or took piano lessons, or listened to classical music or electronic music or latin music and so much more of what informs my tastes these days.  However,  I recently discovered forgotten tapes of the band and remembered what a big part of my life this music and these people were.  It was a very odd feeling.  It all sounded so alien but intimately familiar at the same time.  I feel a very strong sense of gratitude for all of it and I’m actually proud of a lot of it now.

At our best, we had no “artistic” motivation.  We just wanted to have the most fun, exciting show around and I believe we achieved that on many nights.  The recordings don’t really capture it, but I now enjoy them.  The ones on this playlist are my favorites in sort of chronological order.  It’s an odd journey.