#also its not ordered. at all. dont worry about it. ill do it eventually
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kiddokori · 7 months ago
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this fuckin guy
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and the red one too because thats the one i used for the playlist title because spotify kept making his playlist bg color purple when i used the other one and it pissed me off so bad i made him red. anyways look at my 2 hour kim dokja playlist boy
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inkykodo · 1 year ago
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STRESS RELIEF
Warning: Sub!bottom reader!, Dom!top Miguel, Rough play, Breeding kink miguel!, Voyeurism, use of pet names (Good boy etc.), office sex, oral sex, gagging and unprotected sex
This Smut is intended for amab readers, fem aligned readers dni
(This is my first smut fic i ever wrote so im sorry if its a bit rough or amateur i thought i just might try doing this 😭, i also added a bit of fluff in the end lol)
After A hard day of chasing miles morales he eventually escaped with the help of his friends. now he has to find Miles all over again and not to mention the anomaly "The Spot" thats constantly being a pain in the ass to even get a finger on. disappointed Miguel went back to the spidey HQ to asses the situation with layla; its late at night and everyone already went home so he has to pull an all nighter for this one. as he was about to enter his dark and quiet office when he noticed a cubicle being lit up by a computer; he went over to check at the cubicle.
"hey! who's there? (y/n)? why are you still here? you should be home." Miguel asks with frustration and disappointment. you were his assistant but he doesn't want you to work late hours just like him. he worries that you'll be exhausted.
"oh sorry sir. i was just doing paperwork and theres quite a few..." you say let out an awkward laugh as you rub the back of your neck. Miguel puts his hand on his hips as he squeezes the bridge of his nose with the other one; "just get it done... and will you get me a coffee while you're at it? if you dont mind." he said with a deep and exhausted voice. "uh yes sir, ill get you a coffee as soon as possible!" you say immediately as you get up and go to the coffee shop just across the street. Miguel sighs as he turns his back and entering his office again.
you grabbed your coat and prepared to exit the building into the cold and windy night. there were rarely any cars around as you walk across the street; the silent buzzing of the lamp above you as you walk, the damp sound of your boots thumping the ground, your hot breath as you exhale around the cold air; it was all so calming to be just by yourself and not worrying about any reports or documents to get done. ring you enter the coffee shop and greet the barista "hey! (y/n)! nice to see you" Joe plasters a wide grin on his face as he waves at you. "hey Joe can i get the usual?" you chuckle as you approach the enthusiastic barkeep. it puzzles you how someone could be this energetic especially when its late at night. "one latte and café americano coming right up" Joe smiles as he gets to work and you sit down by the window silently observing the place you work at. The towering building reminds you of so much; the first time you went there for your job application, the people you met and hanged out with. ever since you started working here it's been great; you were able to hold down a job and live a comfortable life. ding Joe rang a bell and you snap out of your melancholic trance. "Here's your order (y/n)" you get up from your seat and hand him the payment "Thanks Joe I'll see you around" you chuckle as you wave goodbye and head back to your boss who's waiting for his coffee.
You reach the 20th floor and exit the elevator; you make your wake to his office. "ugh... (y/n)" you hear muffled moans when you approach the door when you hear his deep growls your body immediately tenses up. "you're so cute..." You peep through a slight crevice through the door. you see him then and there stroking his throbbing cock as he calls out your name. "im close... (y/n)" you gasp as you back away and clear your throat. "Sir? your coffee is here" you knock on the door. "Oh- uhh come in!" coffee in hand, you enter his poorly lit office. he always preferred it that way although, you always wondered why. "Here is your coffee sir a caffé americano just as you like it" your body tenses up more as you know he's hard down there and its because of you; as you place it down Miguel suddenly grabs your wrist his talons flexing and protruding "i heard you peeping at me through that hole (y/n)" as Miguel pulls you close to him your body freezes on the spot "do you want a better view cariño?" he leans in and you can see his tip dripping wet with precum.
"Please... Miguel..." you try to avoid his gaze but he grabs your chin and tilts your head downward as he forces you to look at him "Please what cariño?" Miguel lets out a deep and menacing laugh "Be clear with your words boy." Miguel says sternly as he grips one of your thighs with his hands. his sharp talons poking your thigh but not enough to draw blood. "Please... continue..." Miguel's lips curled into a grin "That's more like it. good boy" Miguel begins to move his calloused hands; as it travels up your body he lets his fingers slide through your smooth and soft skin. "your skin im feels like a soft cloud mi vida.." Miguel says as he leans in your neck leaving behind a couple kisses here and there. Miguel continues tracing the shape of your body and he lands on where he started. He pinches and twisted your nipples it tingled and burned against his touch. this turned you into a moaning and whimpering mess. "Miguel... that feels so good..." you bite your lip and you begin to move your hips rubbing against his huge boner. the shape of his girth and the way he was playing with your chest like stress balls drowned you in pure ecstasy. "Getting impatient now are we cariño?" Miguel stops what he's doing and he grabs your waist "Such small and slutty waist i wonder how they'll feel when i use them" He grabs your ass and spreads them "oh and im sure these will feel good too" Miguel looks you dead in the eye letting you know what he's about to do next
"im sorry sir i didn't mean to-" Miguel cuts you off mid sentence as he lifts you up and he places you on his lap. you can feel his boner pressing against your rear as he stares you down ready to absolutely swallow you whole. "shhh callate ahora... we can keep this a secret cariño" Miguel leans in close to your ear as he nibbles on your earlobe; his fangs slightly poking your ear. "you're so adorable cariño all tense like that... i could eat you up right here..." Miguel's hands creep under your clothes as he traces your back. his warm hands making you involuntarily whimper as you arch your back; Miguel smirks as he heard you let out a quiet whimper "Que lindo (How cute)" Miguel removes his hands as he violently rips your buttoned down long sleeve polo. this makes you gasp and "that was my favorite shirt..." Miguel chuckles "Well, you look better without it" Miguel looks up at you as his smug expression seems to be clearly enjoying your reaction. "What do we have here?" Miguel's eyes fell to your chest, letting his calloused hands travel to your waist and closer to your thighs. But something glimmering caught his attention. "Oh?" A low chuckle would rumble as he traced his fingers around your nipple piercing, "What do we have here?" he flicks your pierced nipples. "where have you been hiding this huh? such a naughty naughty boy" Miguel continues to flick and twist your pierced nipple as he takes the other one in his mouth. "ahh... Miguel..." Miguel smiles deviously as he takes your swollen nipple in his mouth. "Hold still cariño" Miguel growls as he plays with the metal object that's attached to your nipple using his tongue. you start to moan and whimper as he plays around with your swollen and sensitive chest; "Miguel... too good..." your chest rises and falls as every sensation shoots pleasure up your brain and makes your whole body start to shake. Miguel stops abruptly as he smirks and leans in your ear "Yeah? Beg for it then."
as he was about to tear your clothes to shreds you two were interrupted by a facetime call. he picks you up and sets you down under his desk and his bulge throbbing right in front of you. the shape of his dick under his Spider-Man suit was impressive. his hard cock pressing against the tight fabric as he sat down properly; it was irresistible. your eyes were fixed at his cock glaring back at you as if its taunting you to suck it. you hear miguel talk with one of the Spider-Man that he worked with earlier you decided to have your turn with him. you slowly unzip his Spidey suit his cock immediately springs out and it even slaps your face. Miguel's eyes widened as he looked down at you; his eyes fueled with surprise and rage "Uh miguel? Are you listening?" Miguel Clears his throat and looks back up "Uh yes, you were saying?" Miguel continues his conversation with the nice lady hes on the phone with. You slowly licked Miguel's tip; the w way his precum drips down your tongue like a busted faucet makes you want to lick it up more. you start licking the base of his shaft and then his glans. "So it seems that the spot wa-" Miguel abruptly stops with a groan as you lick up his leaking tip. "Miguel? you good?" Miguel snarls at you knowing he cant do anything yet "yeah im fine, im kind of busy right now ill call you later" Miguel bids farewell to the nice person as he ends the call. you dont even notice their conversation as youre too busy licking up and lapping his dripping dick. Miguel growls at you "You really want my dick that badly huh? you cant wait to slobber all over it? have at it then" Miguel grabs a handful of your hair as he lines up his dick to your mouth and pushes; He pushes it in deep all the way to the base of his huge cock. "how do you like that huh? i bet youre enjoying the taste of my cock now its all the way down your throat like a good slut you are"
your protests were muffled by Miguel's whole length down your throat. "MmpH!" was all you managed to say as you gripped on his thighs trying desperately to pull away. "Whats wrong (Y/n)? wasnt this what you wanted huh?" Miguel snaps at you he sounded pissed and he wants to put you in your place. Miguel then pressed down further you chin dripping with spit and drool as it sticks to Miguel's balls; he lets go just to catch your breath. "Hah... hah..." your chest falls and rises rapidly as Miguel's precum dripped down his shaft. "We're not done yet cariño" Miguel laughs sadistically as he grabs you by your arms and pins both your hands on his desk "since you clearly want it so bad, ill give it to you good" miguel rips apart your pants his rough hands traces your waist. he moves down lower as he reaches your ass and he feels around. "oh this will be good" his laugh gets deeper and colder as he bends over; his hot throbbing dick pressed against your lower back. "You'll regret playing me (Y/n)" his talons flex as he opens your ass wide open. rip the sound of fabric tearing as he finally rips apart the last remaining clothing you had on. "your puckering hole is just waiting to get fucked" Miguel slaps his drool coated dick on your rear he whispers to you "im gonna make you cry and beg for more"
/Time skip/
Miguel stops abruptly as he opens a drawer and takes out lube you stare at it as he squeezes some on his hand "wait- why do you have lube in your office?" you pant as you ask Miguel "Its better to be ready and not need it or need it and not be ready" Miguel says panting as he rubs some of the lube on his dripping dick. an idea flashes through your mind as you push him down his office chair. "its my turn to take the wheel" you say as you get on his lap and line his dick on your hole. you slowly lower yourself down halfway and you stop. His impressive size was appalling; it already felts so good half-way in you. savoring the sensation you try to prepare yourself for his girth. Miguel seems annoyed as you suddenly stop moving. he grabs your slutty waist and rams you down his fat cock. you let out a lewd moan as it crushes your prostate. you gasp as you try to collect your thoughts from the sudden sensation burning your mind. Miguel pants and squeezes your ass as he begins to thrust on your fat piece of cake. he growls and squeezes down not letting you go anywhere but deeper down on his cock. he watches you bounce up and down while you make noises of pleasure making him smile proudly. "yeah.. thats right be a good boy and take my cock like a slut." Miguel pushes you down deeper as his cock directly presses on your g spot. "Miguel... please..." you beg miguel as he stops and just keeps his cock in you. its throbbing and twitching like crazy. "Not yet Cariño... i wanna see you ride me." Miguel Sneers as you squeeze down on him. As you start riding in your own pace Miguel leans back and puts his hands on the back of his head enjoying the view before him. the more you ride his cock them more it seems to grow inside of you. As you moved yourself up and won on him you began to drool. the wet slicking of his dick on your ass felt so good; everytime it hits your prostate you were sure too see a glimpse of heaven. "You look so good in this position Cariño" Miguel reaches down and feels your hips and thighs as you ride him. saddling up to make yourself feel secure as he guides along your waist as he watches you ride.
After hours of nonstop fucking, (y/n) could only focus on the pleasure he was receiving. His mind could only focus on the man who gave him ecstasy. His voice was starting to hurt from shouting Miguel's name. "Too..ah..much" (y/n) whimpers begging for release. "Hush cariño... im almost there..." Miguel's rough voice drowned out y/n's moans. (y/n) practically lost count of how many times he came. "I can't..." (y/n) moans out.. "yes you can, baby.." Miguel's thrusts were getting rougher and faster. the wet slapping of skin crashing against each other echoes through the office. "do it for me cariño... Just one more" That was a lie. Miguel didn't plan on stopping not until the sun was rising. After one final deep thrust he finally released his final load "Agh...! Cariño im cumming!" Miguel buckles his hip as he grabs your ass and pushes it deep inside you as he came. "Miguel- youre filling me up!" (y/n) yells in surprise as miguel shoots his load deep within (y/n)'s gut. "Fuck im gonna give you my babies" Miguel keeps on going; shooting his load deeper into you it felt like a bump was appearing on your tummy as he does so. Miguel snuggles his lips on your neck as he finally lets his cock slip out of your gaping hole. your shaking legs finally give out as his seed slowly drips onto hour thigh "That was alot..." (y/n) says breathlessly. "Apologies, cariño... i got carried away." Miguel's voice seems to be at ease; somewhat satisfied i guess he had some stress relief. miguel picks you up and cleans after you. he takes you to his apartment since he ripped apart your clothes and gave you some of his clothes. "Thank you Miguel..." You thank him as you grab his clothes. as you put it on his clothes seem too big for you; the sleeves of his shirt droops below your elbow which exposes your neck and his baggy pants that looks like a pajama. "(y/n) you look so cute...) Miguel stares you down with admiration as he grabs you by the waist and outs you down in bed. "Can we cuddle? i feel tired after what we did at your office" (y/n) says sheepishly as he grabs Miguel's arms around his waist and presses against him. "Sure Thing cariño" Miguel kisses you around the nape of your neck as both of you drift to sleep.
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xamaxenta · 1 year ago
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Ghostbusters au but its not at all in which ASL are a small freelance group of childhood friends who bandrd together to create a silly little pest control group their marketing strategy was theyre pros, theres nothing they can’t remove
Until they get the order that someones grandmother is haunted by rhe vengeful family guardian angel and they need a group that isnt godfearing but also come cheap
Sabo’s mad that theyre charging by the job and not hourly but Ace and luffy dont seem to be bothered by this
They brainstorm like what do we do about this, a corrupt guardian angel isnt exactly your typical household pest
Sabo whos godloathing personally is like i guess we just shoo it on out with a broom
Ace: vengeful bro
sabo: :/
Sabo: my original plan was guns then but i was worried youd be upset about that
Ace: my license hasnt expired
Luffy; mine did
Ace: fuckssake everyone gets a gun but luffy
Sabo: hes a better shot than u triggerhappy
Luffy:
Ace: fine ill just beat the feathery bastard up with my bare hands then
So he does
They get paid monumentally well and they eventually open up a proper monster and the supernaturals who have overstayed removal services lol
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topazpearl · 1 year ago
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So remember my big sbg theory doc? forget that existed, heres the new one
Discusses up to Ep 61. Fast-pass spoiler FREE
Content discussions about death, mental illness, sui.cide; yknow. Heavy Thriller webtoon stuff (tm)
[Hamilton chorus voice] NUMBER ONE: Giant freakin phantompedes and how to escape them
-I was right about the football field lights to try to kill them idea yippee
-HOEWVERR, theres so many attacking the school rn and its freaking collapsing?? I literally dont know how they’re gonna get outta this
-Unless (unless) my Phantom Ashlyn theory is relevant, ashlyn can talk to them and tells them to go away and they… do! idk lol it's stupid but maybe ash has enough girl boss energy to convince them. or theyre so shocked by a human talking to them theyre like "dang ok". Could still happen! 
NUMBER TWO: Phantom Transformation Theory
So it’s Basically confirmed: 
If you die in the PD, you start to turn into a Phantom.
Of course we wont know for sure until we actually SEE it but like, Aiden’s creepy af smile and basically coming back to life in ashlyn’s arms after DYING it’s like, basically confirmed. 
Ash wonders why Aiden snapped out of his seizure so fast compared to Tyler. Severity of injuries could definitely be a factor (tho like, im assuming Aiden got freaking blunt force trauma brain damage which, to me, is just as bad as being impaled). Another factor could be that Tyler died only about 30 minutes into the Time, while Aiden died almost right when it ended. And… we saw how fast Aiden started to “turn”. Red technically never shows us Tyler during those hours after he died. He very well… may have completely phantomized, but when he woke up in the real world, the transformation reverted. I'm very scared abt what Aiden’s gonna be like next night.
SUB THEORY: The Power of Human Connection and Phantom Reversal
Remember how Jasmine (the gang tour girl) asked if it was alright that all the kids got sucked in w/ ashlyn? This implies that 
1. They usually expect 1 person/their target to get sucked into the PD
2. The origami gang has never dealt with a group being sucked in at once
- I believe (and the evil gang doesnt know this) that the kids being together is an integral part of their future survival. Tyler snapped back to consciousness in the hospital after Taylor had her PISSED moment. This moment was similar to Logan’s freakout, in that it tugged the phantom world to the real world, for a second. I think these intense emotions (taylor’s specifically out of anger and worry for her twin), pulled tyler’s “soul” out of the PD and into the RD. 
- Now, you may ask, “what abt if a random person got into the PD and died and went into a seizure/coma? Why couldnt their loved ones “bring” them back?” thats a good Q idk. Perhaps the kids all being in the PD together is what creates this flow, a two-way street, between the two dimensions. 
- Anyway also while Ashlyn and co didnt didnt get into an angry freakout moment when Aiden died, but we all know Ash and Aiden got something developing/going on thats special ♥, and thats what tugged Aiden back (its cliche but its the power of love there i said it). 
- Also NOT saying that the other kids’ concern over their friends doesn’t matter or count (Ben and Aiden are Fam too), but like, i’m wondering if it needs to be a REALLY INTENSE love (familial/romantic/whatever) in order to basically bring someone back from the dead. idk
-interestingly, ty WAS essentially in a coma-like state, like how the spy said, which supports that it’s expected that ppl die in the PD eventually, and go into comas. I’m wondering if those who normally get sucked into the PD and die, theyre dealing with it by themselves, have no one to “pull them back” like taylor and/or ashlyn did, and they stay in a coma. 
-rlly hope the boys arent like “possessed” or smn. Maybe the soul is like, tainted? Those big black eyes man… (ALSO THAT PREVIEW IMAGE WITH LOGAN AND THE BIG BLACK EYES??? WHAT??)
-going off the dead PD ppl turn into phantoms theory>> If a phantom is killed, their connected person in the RD who was in a coma dies fr permanently
NUMBER THREE: Ashlyn and the Phantoms (cool new band name) 
we know the kids are getting influenced by the PD, making phantom noises (further supports phantoms were people theory) but with Ashlyn's "really strong" connection to the PD, she's in special danger. If one can turn into a phantom without dying, it's gonna be her. Ryan the spy said that "the girl" – assumingly ashlyn– should be "especially" at risk of danger. This could be bc she was the one who interacted with the rift, or bc she already has a higher level of phantom influence on her. 
-when ashlyn told the phantom to let go, and her friends to calm down, both times she spoke with a black speech bubble WITH PHANTOM NOISE LINES NEAR IT. this is different than characters who have also spoken with black bubbles (aiden, logan, taylor). obviously these have been with threats/malice, but they didn't have the red lines. These times ashlyn has spoken, the phantom acknowledged her voice, and her friends' spell-like violence trance was broken. Theory: ashlyn not only can hear phantoms, but she can speak their language sort of
-when ashlyn was born, a phantom like touched her in a blessing/cursing sense which is part of the reason why she can hear phantoms and her strong PD connection. possibly even possession???? 
-tldr i want ashlyn to enter her monster girl era 
The evil gang seems confused why the kids have lasted so long. maybe Ashlyn's PD connection goes both ways. she provides a strong anchor to the RD. Maybe the PD is USUALLY all desolate with the pillars that we saw in the finale (maybe it's even an afterlife of sorts?), but Ashlyn makes a huge radius (~30 miles! (assuming kids were driving at least 60mph for 30 minutes)) of the PD around where she wakes up mirror the real world, creating a safer space for her and the kids. meanwhile a normal person that gets sucked into the PD gets thrown into a desolate hell world different from the RD (also maybe stuck there permanently), causing them to die much quicker. 
-maybe this influence is even part of the reason why RD tyler is awake (And aiden)
-Ashlyn's influence extends to jamming the recording devices like some kind of weird phantom static.
-Broke: Ashlyn's parents wanted her to learn self defense and have a knife bc they're in the military. Woke: they want her to be able to protect herself after the phantom scare when she was a baby
-Also THANK GOD she’s finally acting on her intuition. Sm times she’s been like “this feels bad!” and doesnt do anything. Almost makes me wonder if it’s a supernatural intuition based on phantom stuff. Like shes WAY OFF from the hospital and the drama and is like “HMM! Smn going on” 
NUMBER FOUR: Origami gang and Co INC. 
-The gangs symbol is an origami crane (orizuru). the crane in East Asia has longevity as one of its symbolisms, with some myths saying it flies souls up to paradise. there's the popular myth that if you fold 1000 cranes you get a wish.
Heres where the evil twist comes in. The gang boss believes that if he traps 1000 people in the PD as like, a sacrifice, then he'll get a wish and he'll ask for eternal life or whatever. this gang is a cult and he's tricked everyone saying that they'll also get a long life but really it's probably only gonna be him 🤫 So they go around to different haunted places in America and pick ppl they sense can open these shadow rifts and get sucked in. the phantoms may be ppl they trapped in the past and they've turned into phantoms
-Ryan, the guy who's spying on the kids, maybe is ALSO "Mr. thomas". he just puts on a wig and is a good actor lol. this is the reason why he asks about "Mr. Thomas's" fate. What goes against this is that Ryan seems to know all about the PD mechanisms, which doesn't fit Mr. Thomas being confused abt ashlyns hair. Unless he wasn't expecting it
– or "Mr thomas" could just be Ryan's friend or brother or smn. A low ranked guy in the gang that got stuck with roping Ashlyn into Savannah, but doesn't know the truth/details about the PD. 
-the gang mentions that "both sides" are trying to track them. either the government and a supernatural hunting group, or even some force in the PD like some Alpha Phantom like the devil who's like "Where's my dead people quota hello?" or better yet "you're messing with MY domain and I'm gonna Get You". 
-This is based solely on the Boss' appearance and smiling countenance: the gang Boss is Aiden's uncle, his dad's brother, his weird, estranged brother who's also evil probably. I'm really hung on this idea don't mind me 
-you have to be able to make a paper origami crane from memory to be an official gang member /hj 
NUMBER FIVE: Gen story/Character arcs and futures
-ready for a “power of love and friendship” aesop. these kids are gonna be so Bonded now after these traumatic experiences
-i had come up with an elaborate “death order” but thats now completely jossed now so im ignoring that
-PRAISING THE FREAKING LORD THAT ALL THE PARENTS KNOW NOWAND THAT MIKE BELIEVES THEM AND IS HELPING HIS DAUGHTER. DAD OF THE YEAR AWARD. IF ANYTHING AHPPENS TO HIM IM SUEING!!!!!
- SO NOW that all the parents know, and like, have seen all the phantoms and everything and BTW WILL PROBABLY GET SUCKED INTO THE PD AT SOME POINT because they felt the shift like the kids did, they help the kids get to Savannah yippee!! a cool Big family squad force they all hop on a working school bus or smn and drive there. PLs
- the families getting sucked in would be HUGE cause they arent prepared. Logan’s grandparents and Lily are top targets 😭
So the kids are gonna get kidnapped. that's definitely gonna be a thing, either mid S2 or ending. up in the air whether the kidnapping is successful or not. (assuming the gang would be smart enough to get rid of the kids’ phones when they get them)
-actually I'm placing my bets now S2 finale will be them getting kidnapped and it just cuts off there for another awful cliffhanger.
-since it seems Mr thomas will be involved, he'll ask the kids to stay after school to talk abt their failing grades or smn, and then maybe they're hit with knockout gas??
OR the gang has been spying on them so they pick a time the kids all separated and jump them. 
-maybe this is when aiden knowing where ashlyns dance studio is is actually plot relevant!!?? like he (and Ben probably cuz they're always together) are able to escape their attackers and Aiden goes to help ashlyn cuz he wants to make sure she's OK. and she's either fine cuz she's a girl boss and can kick butt, or he saves her oo la la 
–lol imagine kidnapping is successful, gang tells kids why they were kidnapped, (if Evil Boss Uncle theory is true this helps facilitate this) but Ashlyn "goes off" on Aiden yelling and "attacking" him and stuff saying he's part of the gang, he planned it all along etc, but it's all a ruse to have the gang think she'll cause another energy spike (and Aiden gets this and plays along) so assuming the kids are locked up, the gang opens their cell to stop ashlyn, and that's when they escape lol
so like, i THOUGHT ashlyn/aiden was gonna be a slow burn but HAHAHA. i mean not as freaking slow obviously as like Miraculous love square lol, but like slow for thriller standards? But things are gonna be heating up between these two 😏 watch ashlyn be ~conflicted~ and ~in denial~~. And meanwhile poor aiden is a confused boy who doesnt know what ash wants like “b u told me to give u space and now here u are grasping my hand like ur life depends on it” 
Sorry back to character arcs:
Ashlyn: Learn to trust and connect with people, make friends, lean on others. Could be nice if she accepts and admits the kids are her friends by the end of S2, leaving the next season for Aiden/Ashlyn dev specifically? More development about her connection with the PD, which could put friendship to the test. [already getting this with her dad and Aiden so this is great]
Also she has the freaking GUILT like i expected! Watch her think tay hates her for like a week before tay is like “no?? I hate the ppl who did this to us instead” and then they hug it out 👍
Taylor: Willing to bet money the twins are unhealthily codependent on each other. She is on the edge bro. Unhinged feral. Is probably gonna be more angry in general despite it being a bad idea, like the top has been blown off. Bottled up emotions~! 
Still thinking she’ll get close to Ben too (whether anything romantic develops on top of it is debatable, but I can see it. theyve already got a cute little closeness going on)..
Tyler: Get this boy some ~THERAPY~ help he’s so depressed and angry. Learn to have hope again (like ben 😭). He has so much negativity inside him, i dont think that’ll help with whatever is going on with him rn like, hes probably in the THICK of the PD influence. He’s kinda like ash, needs to learn to rely on others.
Logan: Seems to be overcoming his fragility well if the arcade scene is any indication. Still has self-worth issues to overcome due to his parents' abandonment. Maybe we'll learn more about that in S2. That could be a rumor and the real reason he lives with his grandparents is that his parents died but idk why that'd be hidden unless their death was suspicious (like, drug ring?? His gpa got the GOODS APPARENTLY). 
Ben: Still needs to find a new passion for life, i suspect playing musical instruments like the guitar will be the answer (thank you tyler). Tho maybe learning to love his altered voice could happen? (tons of dudes have a rough/husky singing voice that ppl love) But this is probably unlikely.  
Aiden: Good Lord like, Aiden being (most likely) suic.idal in the past (and possibly even still NOW?) has floored me. I figured his loneliness and suspected parental neglect was bad but IT’S BAD. Dude wants to feel alive and not depressed… frick. AIDEN ARE YOU going to therapy??? Do your parents KNOW??? Is that why your parents finally settled down?? Guh. this on top of probably untreated ADHD.
–I’m assuming now Aiden started dying his hair to try to get any fragment of serotonin. 
– Kinda wondering if he grew up in a "toxic positivity" mentality home, where his parents are like "we're so privileged we shouldn't complain" ?
– im actually THIS close to beating Aiden’s parents with a stick.
NUMBER SIX: Miscellaneous predictions, wants, musings & hypotheticals.
-guessing now that the twin’s dad had cancer or smn
-hey uh what about the photo Logan took of the phantom back at the sorrel-weed house?? surely he still has it? can he show the parents?? will they be able to see it?
-Logan saw the whole Aidlyn hug from the roof from his snipper position, change my mind.
-Another “death” will happen in S2, possibly even two deaths. (GOD I WAS RIGHT)
-Mr thomas switches sides and helps the kids, gives them info
-Ryan (the spy) switches sides and helps the kids
-the tour lady Jasmine and the Boss are a hot evil couple 
also kinda want them to have a Rourke & Helga dynamic where he throws her under the bus at the last moment and she's Bissed 
-I want the boss to die by his own evil plan. 
–i doubt a redemption arc will happen but I'd be down for it if done well.
-*grabs your shoulders until they bleed* listen. Aiden saved ashlyn, now I need her to save him. I need this. 
-Taylor and Ashlyn girl time please!!!
-Logan and Aiden becoming closer would also give me joy. big Freckle and Rocky energy. 
-this doesn't have to happen but I think it'd be really funny if Aiden somehow gets the IDEA that Logan has a crush on Ashlyn when Logan doesn't, causing a stupid silly short jealousy arc.
-actually I really need a "can skydive from 10,000 ft but can't confess to the girl he likes" Aiden Clark 
-I've got a bad feeling smn will happen to Ashlyn's parents, specifically her dad
-if any of the gang/cult members hurt the kids or their fam fr irl im gonna >8) lose it
-the Origami gang fails to kidnap the kids and they accidentally create a huge "energy spike", making phantoms appear everywhere in town.
-if the kids DO get kidnapped successfully, I want Ashlyn to be an awesome girlboss and use her knife shoes to help them escape.
-if my puppy fic became Canon that'd be swaggie actually.
-let Ashlyn have a dog 2023
-pov you're in Georgia in the fall and a hurricane hits, knocking out solar power for a few days. what then? :)
-when all this garbage is over and they hopefully all live in the end, I want them to have a fun stargazing party led by Logan cause they can finally enjoy the night (And maybe aidlyn have their first Kiss?? 🙈)
-If there ISNT a "group goes to see Ashlyn in a ballet performance" scene then I'm WRITING IT MYSELF 
-At the end of all things, Aiden and Ashlyn will become a couple, or at least have reciprocal romantic feelings. This is not just my shipper heart talking. I feel it in my brain, in my soul. 
-So we know one or both of Aiden’s parents are writers. If anyone knows if that trophy Aiden’s dad is holding in that photo is a real award, hmu
-a kid going into an angry protective phantom mode to protect another(s) 😳 (aidlyn on the brain but it could be anyone)
-if I had a nickel for every time I've imagined Aiden dying in Ashlyn's arms, I'd have many nickels (IT BASICALLY HAPPENED! GREAT! 👍😭)
-what if having a good singing voice ran in Ben's family? haha jkjk…unless??? but they don't sing like ever cuz they don't want Ben to feel bad 
-man what if an sbg kid “died” by a phantom pushing them down a set of stairs.. 
-Rlly hope that Aiden's parents don't get scared seeing phantoms in their house and hearing other families having phantoms in THEIR houses and thinking the whole town is haunted, and they consider moving which they don't wanna do bc Aiden finally has friends but what else can they do!? angst. 
-John 15:13 for Ashlyn with the others except it's not permanent (I'm not saying ash is a Jesus figure tho WHWKEJEJDJ)
-I rlly wanna see ashlyn laugh
-Taylor actually using her mechanic skills. like maybe the jeep gets damaged [HAPPENED] and she fixes it. I dont want that jeep gone bro its already iconic (update: it’s probably gone bro.. sad)
-might be nice for Logan to have a reflection moment where even though all this horrible stuff is happening some good came out of it like he's not a slave to bullies anymore 
-I want to see Ben happy. well actually I want them all happy pls
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enlighten3d · 5 months ago
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THEORY UPDATEEEE
im out fishing rn (edit: not anymore lol, im finishing typing this on pc, thank fuck) and i heard some Things about the kenadian stream.. wato has read our posts... so, hello wato! i swear im not THAT insane. anyway, we carry on as usual.... SO NOW: THE UPDATED THEORY ON WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING IN THIS LORE !!
this is actually the third theory update, the other two just never survived for long enough bcs we kept finding new stuff lmao. but, heres my first theory (now very outdated), and here are the other two, copypasted from messages of me explaining the two unposted theories (feat. me speculating wildly as i do): theory 2, theory 3 (mind that both of these were formatted for discord which is why they may be odd)
okay so now! the fourth theory, yet again featuring wild speculation, now with the added spice of me having read too much mcyt fanfic! (that last part prolly makes no sense. dont worry abt it.)
in this theory, i am proposing that evil wifies is like, a LOT more evil, and has done a lot of fucked up Experimentation. which lead to void wifies. explanation below the cut (its prolly gonna be long again T-T) (also, as always: tons of wild speculation ahead. ill try to present all evidence but i forget what those outside of the gc know or dont):
okay so first off, as always, we assume that wato got the mask from killing ken during the train escape. then (evil) wifies somehow got the mask from wato at,, IDK, SOME POINT. before everything happened.
so wifies, corrupted by the power of the mask, starts faking escape rooms and invents cloning in order to do it. now hes evilfies (thank you wifies for calling him evilfies thats so much quicker to type than evil wifies)! and so evilfies, having invented cloning, starts fucking around and Experimenting like the mad scientist ive decided he is.
what does he next Experiment on? the mask! why? why the fuck not. he likes the power it gives him so he decides to somehow try and tie it to himself permanently. he does this by somehow merging a part of his code with that of the mask, and therefore unintentionally giving it sentience (somewhat). evilfies thinks this is fineeeee...
so, to test the constraints of this new form of the mask, evilfies puts the mask in a bunker of sorts, to see if the tie between him and the mask would remain. the bunker is a bedrock room...
also, at this point, evilfies has already asked wato to build that escape room for the video. so wato starts Planning it (and filming the tutorial video that we can assume exists in canon), doing so in the same world as all of evilfies stuff. why? bcs evilfies want to keep an eye on wato and the escape room build. also, why not. i am not discounting the idea that evilfies is forcing wato to build escape rooms for him yet.
so bcs its in the same world.. wato accidentally falls down a chute into the bunker where the mask has been placed (as seen in the wato yt short). now, i STILL cant explain what the fuck that snom is, but.. voidfies (void wifies, now with a shorter name!) is there (for anyone who hasnt seen @fncreatures post: voidfies is the weird void guy with the mask. yes thats wifies too.)... I WONDER WHY.
ysee, when evilfies tied part of his code to the mask, that code and the masks code ended up getting tied together, yeah? well the world needs some way to render the mask in the world (btw were getting into the way that realistic minecraft works in mcyt fanfiction now lmao). and when it reads the masks code, it sees that theres wifies code there too.. and renders the mask as being on wifies. ofc, the code is corrupted, so its not entirely wifies. its just.. the outline of him. the mask remains the only clear thing.
so wato falls down into the bunker where voidfies is, and voidfies/the mask attacks wato - hence the blood (redstone) on the ground. eventually wato makes it out of there, but.. but now he has the mask again. now the mask has control of them once again. oh noes,,, but yeah, the mask now being partially wifies code-wise is my explanation for wato wearing wifies clothes as well. the world just tries to partially render him as wifies and that results in her having the wifies clothes.
but, wato carries on! they keep building the escape room, mask or no. he finishes up the escape room, tells evilfies, and evilfies is like.. 'why the fuck do you have the mask'. yet again,, oh noes! oh well. this is an opportunity for more Experimentation! atp evilfies deserves the whole mad scientist getup, labcoat and goggles and all... but i digress. anyway, wato proceeds to disappear for the next little while. i wonder where they are !! definitely not, and i quote watos tumblr post, "an elaborate array of escape rooms". which i asSUME means the uhhh absurdly big one seen in but there was more. idfk what kind of Experimentation evilfies got up to, but.. we dont talk about it. definitely involved comparing wato to the wifies clones in some way tho, in order to explain wato having the wifies head on.
so anyway, the wifies and ken videos happen as per normal (this is why wato knew the servers ip when he gave it to ken!! cause shes trapped there!!), and then.. then evilfies teleports masked wato into the escape room right before the Confrontation happens.
now, all the Experimentation that evilfies has done has fucked up the masks code even further, and now wato along with it! to say his memories are Scrambled would be.. an understatement, id say. but now, with the masks code being even more fucked, it Glitches sometimes and like, loses the way it manifests (the clothes/wifies silhouette) or its control slips and wato can Think. however due to her memories being Scrambled, when the masks control slips once theyre inside the escape room, the last thing he can remember is falling into that hole where evilfies was. its always the last thing they can remember. every single time the mask Glitches, the last thing she remembers is that hole. its the Final Memory until the mask regains control
but either way, now inside the escape room with the masks control having slipped, wato is confused as FUCK as to where he is. wasnt he just planning this escape room? now its built? and completed (twice)? wild.. so they panic, but the mask unglitches and regains control. masked wato continues solving the escape room in order to get out, uses the wifies head to get out, the norm. but on the win platform,, masked wato Glitches again. this time, its a clothing glitch. LISTEN, THIS IS MY EXPLANATION FOR THIS. I MAY BE MAKING SHIT UP WITH THAT ONE, BUT ITS IMPORTANT ENOUGH TO MENTION. either way, the Glitch happens then goes back to typical masked wato.
then.. things go as usual ! masked wato makes their way to evilfies evil lair, go up to his office, takes one of the wifies heads from the armour stands, put it on, and sits in evilfies chair. now, why, you ask? well... due to the mask being in control, and the mask being partially evilfies code right now, its reasonable to assume that itd have some sort of memory of sitting in that chair, right? that office belongs to the person whose code it is partially made out of. so it might feel like it belongs there. so masked wato sits there. then a Glitch or internal conflict of some sort happens. masked wato paces around, trying to resolve it, but fails and.. jumps out the window.
masked wato goes to the Array Of Escape Rooms that they prolly spent the last while in. its also where his spawnpoint prolly is (yet again, according to watos tumblr post. thank you, wato.), so i suppose the instinct to go there when in probable distress makes sense. there, at the Escape Room Array, wato.. somehow loses the mask. i dont know if she manages to somehow separate himself from it, but the mask is gone and is back to being its own separate being. however, due to wato having had the mask for a while and the code being Fucked Up, it takes a while for the world to stop rendering watos clothes are wifies clothes.
but as with all the other theories, there at the absurdly big escape room, is where ken finds wato, drags them back with her, and then ken and wifies Interrogate wato. watos memories are fucked up, doesnt remember anth concrete, he leaves to go on the 'looking around and having Flashbacks' adventure. during the interrogation, voidfies made its way back to the main area, and is Spying on them through the windows..
so after all this, wato is the one that gets evilfies evil clone factory. he owns it now (this is based off the same post that wato made across three platforms lmao)! woo! cleans the place up, sets her spawnpoint there, and yay they have a home [:
what happened to voidfies tho?
no clue.
BUT WITH ALL THAT OUT OF THE WAY, HAVE A TIMELINE/SUMMARY OF EVENTS ACCORDING TO THIS THEORY (gods i love tumblr having no wordlimit im so sorry abt the length of this post):
- wato gets the mask during the train escape - a long while before any of these videos, wifies gets the mask from wato, which compels him to be Evil and invent cloning in order to fake escape rooms - evilfies likes the mask and decides to tie his code to it via Experimentation, which gives the mask sentience and a physical form resembling wifies - to test if the mask stays tied to him, evilfies puts it in a bedrock chamber far away from him. wato, having been building and planning the escape room wifies commissioned on the same server, accidentally falls into this bedrock room, gets attacked, and the mask gets control of him. masked wato now has wifies clothes due to the world being unable to read the masks code properly - masked wato finishes building the escape room - evilfies finds out about wato having the mask now, and drags her off to the Array Of Escape Rooms for more Experimentation (possibly using her as a comparison point for the clone wifies, hence the wifies head (so he Blends In)) - wifies and ken videos happen - before the Confrontation, evilfies teleports masked wato into the escape room, where masked wato Glitches and the masks control slips. wato, their last memory being falling into that bedrock room, is confused as fuck. mask regains control, masked wato finishes the escape room using the wifies head, Glitches visually at the win platform, and makes his way to evilfies evil lair - at the evil lair, masked wato takes one of the wifies heads and put it on and sits in evilfies chair possibly due to the mask having residual evilfies memories from his code. then there is either a Glitch or internal conflict of some sort, and masked wato jumps out of the window - having made her way to the Escape Room (where his spawnpoint prolly is), wato manages to get rid of the mask - the world hasnt stopped rendering their clothes and those of wifies yet - and is found by ken - ken and wifies interrogate wato. wato does not remember many things. voidfies is Spying on them.. - wato goes on a bit of trip down flashback lane - wato gets ownership of the evil lair
thats that!
tldr: wato is FUCKED - now both on a memories AND code level! the mask is sentient and partially wifies, and no one know how fucked up stuff is
what this theory DOESNT explain: the White Blob (AGAIN. WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING.), why theres a chute to the bedrock bunker if the door is the intended exit (we see wato go out through the door in the true creator), how on earth this theory would work if i hadnt read too much mcyt fanfic, when on earth wifies originally gets the mask from wato, how wato remembers 'building most of the escape room' when he got the mask before even starting to build it and hence not remembering building it (this one could be explained by saying her memories are coming back, actually).
is this theory probably wrong? once again: YES! do i care? not particularly! i am bullshitting! this is Wild Speculation!! its fun! evilfies deserves to be a mad scientist!
ty for reading this 2149 word post, and ty to the other members of the theorising gc! @brain-empty @fncreature and @viv-imus-illogic ! shoot me a dm with your discord username if you want to join o7
and.. thats that, yeah. im going to go cry now /nsrs
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theultimatemodjester · 21 hours ago
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I am bored and insane so therefore i will write about my TAOCC Shovel Knight AU (mainly featuring Simon, Zachariah/Zombie, and Alice/Wonderland (thats what im calling her for now) and Dusk/Dark Dusk (i forgot her name). spoilers for Specter of Torment cause i havent seen all of it iM WORKING ON IT
Ok so roles
Zachariah/Zombie -> Donovan/Specter Knight
Simon -> Luan
Alice/Wonderland -> Reize/Dark Reize/Nightmare Reize
Dusk/Dark Dusk -> Shield Knight/The Enchantress (Jessy is Shovel Knight so i dont wanna hear it)
I dunno who Black Knight would be. so yolo take Black Knight as whoever ig rn lol
ALRIGHT NOW STORY TIME
So, the "beginning" of this ver of SoT lore wise starts off with a memory of Zachariah and Simon being partners (not in a romantic sense, like buddies in crime) and them going on a journey to find the Amulet™️(this is important), to which Zachariah says it'll help keep Simon's sister, Alice, safe, since Simon worries Alice's reckless nature will get her in trouble.
(Now from this im reading off the wiki) Once the two get to where the amulet is, right before they take it, Dusk appears and warns the two about the amulet and the dangers it poses. This causes Simon to rethink taking it, but causes Zachariah to think she wants it for herself and tells Simon to just take it. This causes Dusk to attack Zachariah and battle while Simon stands to the side. After the battle, the Tower crumbles (did i mention we're in the Tower of Fate), Zachriah still wants the amulet, Simon tries to convince Zachariah to leave it, and Zachariah tells him to back off and hurts him by slicing him with his sword. Eventually the floor collapses as both fall and Dusk watches from a distance.
After Zachariah falls, close to death, Dark Dusk shows up (ill explain how when i do SoH) and gives him a chance of life if he brings her an army of knights, he accepts and she turns him into an undead reaper, now Zombie. Dark Dusk then gives him a locket that will grant him life if he does his task of recruiting 8 knights for her Order.
NOW WERE IN MAIN GAME !
Blah blah blah Zombie goes out, recruiting knights, most being forced to, theres a Magic Mirror in the ToF that can take him anywhere, eventually Alice shows up and wants to disspell the evil in the tower, Dark Dusk appears, and Zombie tries to say shes a nobody and escort her out (yknow to protect her) Dark Dusk then shoots magic at Alice, turning her into Wonderland, now the Mirror operator.
After the last stage, Wonderland was nowhere to be found. Black Knight shows up when Dark Dusk appears and calls her out for being Dusk (how he knows i have NO IDEA he doesnt have a campaign and i couldnt care less about bk). Zombie hears this and wants to get revenge after everything shes done to him, Black knight leaves, Zombie deafeats him yaddah yaddah yaddah
At the very end, Zombie finds Dark Dusk in the same room he fought Dusk. She wants an eight member (theres only seven rn), but Zombie wants to end her. She gets pissed and they battle, eventually she summons Wonderland and turns her to (a more evil?? Wonderland??) and sends her to fight Zombie. Once he deafeats Alice, she goes back to normal as Zombie quits. Dark Dusk says that she would have Alice be the eight knight and give Zombie life. Zombie refuses and tells her to leave her alone and joins himself. He then uses the locket to bring Alice back to life instead of him.
Of course being himself, in a scene where all the members bow to Dark Dusk, he stands tall, defiant to the end.
Also in one of the memory sequences Simon gives Zachariah a locket cause he felt that Zachariah was family, as he promises to lay his life down to save Alice's. Get it? Hahaha dark humor go brrrrrr
Anyways yeah thats the whole story shovel knight au go br
I dunno how Silhouette would come into play cause Simon kinda. Dies at the fall and doesnt fucking Sonic (this haunts Zombie) OMFG ITS PLOT POINT PEAK ALL OVER AGAIN
I wouldve swapped Simon and Zachariah but the Simon and Alice thing fit too well since its a family bond so yolo
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3liza · 3 years ago
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talking about flters and real beauty vs fake beauty and cultural standards etc always makes me think about all the victorian and edwardian novels i read, where the things that people thought about beauty were recorded at length. recently ive been reading a lot of Thomas Hardy (best known for Tess of the D’Urbervilles and Jude the Obscure) and there’s so much discussion of the beauty of people, particularly love interests, both men and women. and these writers, and their eras, and the culture of the eras, was of course obsessed with beauty and youth and also artificial beauty (being the eras of the really transformative corsets, not to mention some of the earliest industrialized or modernized beauty products or processes), as all human societies are to a greater or lesser extent in their own ways, but the thing that sticks out to me in reading these books is how beauty is not the singular or even the most important aspect of a person’s overall attraction. if someone has a beautiful face or figure, it is mentioned, but never to the obsessive, fixated extent that physical beauty is isolated from and elevated over all other features in modern american/western culture. there are plenty of protagonists or love interests in these books who are described as not young, or not remarkable, or not pretty, or even ugly or frightening, but nevertheless compellingly sexy and attractive, or simply interesting, or worthy in some way. 
its weird that the cultural consciousness has become seemingly ignorant of non-physical attraction. like that anon that was in my inbox talking about how they were “normal looking’ and therefore “needed” filters in order to “compete” with attractive people. it’s a weirdly mercenary and capitalist view of the social economy, first of all, which absolutely is not zero-sum no matter how badly the social networks want to convince us that it is. but there was never a single mention from that person about their ability to charm or entertain or attract using anything except a fake photo of themselves. wild. im fuckin worried about them! im worried about every young person how has brain worms
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when i was about 4 and starting to become aware of how much adults were obsessed with my appearance because i was dainty and blonde and could do a passable shirley temple imitation, my parents gave me a very serious lecture about what physical beauty actually meant: i didn’t work for it (yet, i mean i do a lot of work now as an adult), it was given to me genetically. and someday, maybe sooner or more suddenly than anyone could predict, it would be gone. if accident, illness, or hardship didnt get me, old age eventually would. so with that being a certainty, i had better build a life and a personality on something other than my looks. and i said, ok. every day i get older im more grateful for that advice and the fact i decided to take it to heart instead of trying to gamble on Being Hot for long enough to get job security. which is also a valid career choice but it’s a risky one. always better to have a fallback just in case.
im of an age rn where a lot of women in my peer group are starting to get a very hunted vibe about the impending end of their youth, which is valid. theres nothing foolish about it, its not their fault, theyre not stupid or somehow lacking because this is an issue in their lives. but im noticing that i am significantly less freaked out by, idk, how long ago the 90s were or whatever, because i have been expecting to get old since i was in kindergarten. and i had adults around me who were just like “hey this is what old people look like and what bodies do over time. its not a big deal. everything on tv is fake btw”. i didnt get out unscathed, ive had eating disorders and all sort of weird brain-body problems. 
my advice i guess if i have any is to go outside and really look around you. notice how almost every single woman, and most men, has at least some cellulite, even if its just when theyre sitting down or whatever. notice how everyone has blemishes and zits. most people have some dandruff. if someone is wearing makeup, it’ll be cakey or balled up or smeared or uneven or clumpy even if it’s just a bit. everyone over the age of about 20 will have stretch marks somewhere, even if they aren’t visible except in certain light. i was under the impression i didnt have many until one time seeing a picture of my butt in FULL natural light and finally saw the entire surface of both cheeks was covered in straitions, they just were hard to see most of the time because im the color of drywall and scars tend to be light. it’s really easy to spot hair extensions and wigs and fake nails and fake tans and shapewear once you figure out how to see it. and none of these things take away from someone’s character. 
there’s a strong argument to be made that when corsetry was the norm, no woman was expected to simply be the shape of the corset unless she was actually wearing it. photographs and drawings of women in the 19th and early 20th century were retouched a bit as all photos have been, yes, but they were not retouched to make naked women appear to be corset-shaped. THAT is new. people are now getting surgery to be corset-shaped. and like, i dont think anyone should not be able to look however they want if they want to have that surgery. that is one meaning of cyborg feminism, probably. what i dont want, is for anyone to ever think that’s a normal way to look (except for veryvery tiny mathematical outliers, the Barbie Hips Georg of instagram) WITHOUT surgery or shapewear. which i see a lot now. i saw an instagram fashion designer with a very obviously surgically-altered body answer a question in her inbox about how she maintained her figure with some nonsense about diet and exercise. so now some (probably young) person out there is thinking that if they just do intermittent fasting enough, theyll look like a woman with butt and boob implants, a BBL, fillers, etc. that person probably thinks that if they arent able to diet and exercise good enough, they will fail at looking that way through their own laziness and lack of work ethic or whatever. i see that mindset constantly, especially in young women.
the surgery isnt the issue. the look itself isnt the issue. the filters themselves arent the issue. the issue is that on none of these images, is there an indication of what has been changed or how. the brain damage effect of filters would be lessened, i think, if everyone KNEW which images had been altered and how. so maybe thats the answer? mandatory labeling? i dont know. what’s terrifying is that the average adult human in america cant tell from a glance what has been altered in a photograph, no matter how clumsily, because they simply dont have a template for what a real human looks like anymore. the false images have supplanted the real images, the actual memories of alive humans that you know and have met or lived with. 
if you go into any of the shittier men’s spaces online you will find threads for posting pictures of “beautiful girls”, and it is page after page after page of teenagers in full makeup, hair extensions or wigs, circle lenses, facetuned, bodytuned, surgery, etc, and then hundreds of men yearning and fanning themselves over her “natural beauty”. dont go looking for this stuff, it will permanently fuck you up to know what a basic guy on the bus is thinking about women every day. dont do it
but i also seriously predict a backlash into “natural” looks after this current madness, similarly to how the 1960s saw the rise of the hippie girl with swingin titties, pit hair and no high heels after the consumer beauty madness of the 50s. of course the 60s beauty ideals were in some ways just as fake, but there was some authentic yearning towards a freedom from capitalist bodies as well. so when that happens send me $20: paypal.me/3liza. should be in like the next 4 years or so. thanks
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faggotgamzee · 3 years ago
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hello i have a skephalo vampire au that ill never write but i want it out of my head, a plot outline under the cut, feel free to do whatever the fuck you wanna do with this id just love to see it if you do
Skephalo vampire au: Bbh meets skeppy in the most unfortunate of circumstances, 12 year old skeppy gets bitten and kept as a vampire spawn with no will and servant to the vampire that bit him, bbh and his mentor raid the place and kill all the vampires, bbh takes pity on young skeppy, not being capable of killing a child he decides to feed him the blood of the vampire that bit him to free him of the trance and orders him to run, unbeknownst to his mentor. Time skip 8 years later skeppy has left his hometown where he was bitten and is doing very well for himself, he is a very adept vampire with a clan thats like a family (think idots, invadedlands gang) he is rich and invests in real estate (lol) but tells people he is a magician for a living. Vampires in this au can be in the sun but only for short amounts of time otherwise they’ll get bad skin burns eventually think 2-3 hours max, skeppys strong suit is that he can stay out in the sun double the amount and skeppy is very adept at using vampire compulsion in a way that makes people not realize, it’s very soft and more of a suggestion and planting ideas in people's heads he is also very good at blending in with normal people. Skeppy decides he wants to go back to where he grew up on a whim one day, either to confront his past or something like that, everyone disagrees with him and the he shouldn't because that area isnt a safe space for vampires due to vampire hunters but he decides to hell with their warnings and leaves, they all follow him one by one eventually because theyre worried for him and theyre not gonna leave him alone in case he gets in trouble In almost a string of fate type deal he immediately runs into bbh in a bakery/coffee shop looking for muffins, skeppy recognizes bbh and is almost floored he is just standing there staring at him in shock before he realizes he should probably act normal, he says hi and then he is worried at first that bbh will recognize him but he doesn't skeppy has changed very much from when he was 12, skeppy almost considers following bbh but he knows he is a hunter and doesn't want to risk it, instead he camps out the shop hoping to see him again and he does, bbh comes in every couple days for muffins and coffee After a while he works up the courage to approach him out of impulse and to talk to him he doesn't know what compels him but he needs to know more about him Essentially he tries super hard to befriend him, after a couple false assumptions about dating and a LOT of suspicion and shut downs, bbh agrees to hang out with him after skeppy tells him he is a magician and he gets roped in to do a show for kids that bbh teaches and skeppy is floored thats the thing that gets him to open up Bbh hasnt been a hunter in a long time, he works as a teacher’s assistance for elementary kids, he does become a sort of a mentor to the dteam in terms of vampire hunting picking them up like strays over the years, dream especially is very gungho about being a hunter after a bad experience with werewolves and he is very good at studying and the reputation of the area being dangerous for the paranormal comes from him (i think itd be cool if he gets bit and turned into a vampire later on and skeppy gives his help and its a secret between them)
George comes from a family of witches/warlocks so he is already familiar with the paranormal he met bbh when they were both highschool age and they kinda just.. Knew that the other knew and stuck together Sapnap was bad’s first stray he (dream being second) that he picked up after saving him he was orphaned after a real bad vampire attack and sapnap just kinda stuck to him like glue bad tried to avoid him but sapnap is persistent and real quickly bad kinda just warmed up to him and started teaching him and took on a more father figure role for him Everyone jokes that skeppy really seems to want to date bad cuz skeppy is obsessed with bad and no one realizes why skeppy is so fascinated by bad in that he saved his life years ago, he knows bad would kill him if he knew what he was so he keeps it a secret and he is very good at blending in, he keeps wanting to see how far he can take it and after a bet from one of the idots (they dont know bad is a hunter) that he wouldnt be able to drink bad’s blood he takes it to a next level and starts a dance between them, bbh is immediately suspicious of skeppy and shares that suspicion with dteam only to be met with something along the lines of not everyone who is interested in you is out to kill you Skeppy enjoys toying with bad and seeing how far he can go, its maddeningly harder than he thought to drink his blood, bbh is very prepared and very vigilante, any attempts of following him home are moot he always loses him, he still manages to fuck with him, bad is always doubting if skeppy is a vampire or not until he isnt either via dream getting bit and skeppy helping him and it coming out or something like that, but its important for it to come out after bad and skeppy have grown inseperably close so he doesnt kill him immediately lmao Notable mentions technoblade and skeppy both were orphan vampires in a city and have a sort of camaraderie between them
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honeykawa · 4 years ago
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Fly | Route: Tanaka Ryuunosuke
genre: mafia au, choose your own adventure
warnings: violence, suggestive themes but nothing graphic
word count: 3.1k
Fly Masterlist
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“I choose him”
You looked at the man who had been standing in the corner of the room with his arms crossed
“Tanaka get your ass moving and take them home. Pick them up in the morning and take them home from now on. Make sure they dont run away or itll be on your head”
“Got it boss”
The car ride to your apartment was filled with silence and the soft sound of music coming from the radio
You were too nervous to say anything
The growing feeling of anxiety in your chest made it almost hard to breath
You started to unconsciously grab at the area above your chest and your breathing became irregular
‘How did i get into this mess?’ ‘whats going to happen to me?’
These thoughts keep rushing through your head
“--hey are you okay?”
Tanaka pulled the car over so he could stop and assess just what was happening
And from the way he saw it...it looked like an anxiety attack
His panicked a little himself watching you like this he didnt even want to imagine the feelings rushing through you right now
He got you to control your breathing again and come down from your panic
“You good now?”
You nodded your head, still weary about being near this man
He could tell you were still on your guard with the way you wrapped your arms around your body, as if you were trying to make yourself smaller
“I know it seems rough right now but i swear itll be okay”
His voice was soft with you, something you didnt expect from someone in the mafia
The car ride after that went pretty smooth
“We’re here”
The ride went faster than you thought it would and you got out of his car before saying your goodbyes
“Ill pick you up in the morning...if you need me heres my card”
He held out his card to you as you slowly took it from his hands
“See you”
And with that he sped off as you went inside your apartment to go to bed, hoping that maybe this had all been a dream
Once tanaka got back to his apartment he immediately plopped himself onto his bed and covered his eyes with his arm while thoughts of you plagued his mind
‘Cute’
His arm fell down to his side and he just stared at the ceiling
“Get your shit together tanaka. Your job is to watch them, nothing more”
He rolled over to his side with thoughts of you fading as he drifted into sleep
You woke up to the sound of light knocking on your door
And as soon as you opened the door it finally set in that last night really did happen
“Are you ready to go?”
Tanaka took one look at you and let out a deep sigh knowing that you werent
“Ill give you fifteen minutes”
You nodded your head as you ran back into your room and changed into something work appropriate
Wait where were you working? What would be considered work appropriate?
Based off of what tanaka was wearing you assumed something business casual
When you came out you looked at tanaka to see if this was good enough and he just nodded his head and started walking back towards his car, opening the door for you to get in
“I talked it over with daichi and youll be working with me as my assistant”
Your eyes widened and he immediately knew what went through your mind
“No not like that! Like with actual business stuff you wont really have to do anything with the mafia”
His flailing around made you laugh a bit and lifted a weight off of your shoulders
Listening to you laugh was almost relaxing, his cheeks heating up from the mere sight of your carefree smile
He gave you a quick tour of the place and introduced you to the others if you ran into them but that was about it
As his assistant you really didnt do much
If anything it felt like he was just an over glorified babysitter
But you shuffled through the files he gave you and sorted them the way he wanted
Tanaka watched you from the corner of his eye while you both worked
It wasnt that he was worried you would do it wrong
But it was just last night that you had that anxiety attack right in front of him
“y/n do you want to go out?”
You looked up from your papers and looked at him in confusion
“Right now? And what do you mean by ‘go out’?”
A big smile appeared on his face
“Yeah right now! Lets go! And dont think too much of it”
He stood up and grabbed his wallet
You followed him and as you two rounded the corner of the block he held the door open to a small cafe
“Go ahead and order whatever you want its on me”
You were weary about being here
Would you two get in trouble for leaving like that?
Tanaka could see the worry still lingering on your face and rose his hand to gently pat your head
“Like I said its on me so dont worry about leaving the office ill take any repercussions if there are any”
The grin on his face took a weight off of your chest and you felt like the air around you wasnt so thick anymore
After getting back to the office no one had even noticed that you two had even left
Whos running this place??
The next few weeks seemed to be fine
It was almost like you lived a normal life and you werent being watched by the mafia
You and tanaka had grown closer and it was easier to talk to the others now
He treated you kindly and tried to understand your situation
Unlike the two interns who always berated you for not knowing where certain files were or would roll their eyes when you would flinch at sudden movements the first few days
But tanaka took it slow with you, doing little things so that youd be more comfortable
At first it was subtle
If you needed to go make a copy of something he’d suddenly need to go grab something from the copy room with you even if you insisted that you could get it for him
Or how he always tried to include you in conversations with others so you would get more comfortable around everyone
Tanaka grew to be someone who it was easy for you to be around
But that sense of calmness was quickly wiped away when you joined him on one of his...excursions
“Heres the case. Now give us what we want”
Tanaka held the case in front of him while you just watched from the car
Sure, he’d take you with him but he’d never let you actually get out
He didnt really want this to take too long
Especially since it was just him against a good handful of men
But the men he was making the trade deal with suddenly saw you in move in the car and locked eyes with you
His smile sent a chill down your spine formed on his face
“New deal: give me that hot piece of ass in the car and you have a deal”
Tanakas jaw clenched at the the disgusting words just said about you
“Im sorry but,”
You couldnt see tanakas face until he looked up at the man in front of him
The look on his face utterly terrified you
“I’ll kill you if you even try to put a hand on them”
Everyone stood there unmoving, too scared to move
Tanaka turned around and headed back to the car where you were
“Deals off if that wasnt clear”
But one of the other men moved towards him
“The fuck you mean its off!”
Tanaka easily evaded the man’s advance and took him down with only a quick few movements
“Anyone else want to try”
The question was simple enough but no one dared made eye contact with him as he got into the car and drove off
The car ride was quiet, youd never seen tanaka look like that before
It scared you
He scared you
Tanaka noticed your silence and reached a hand out to pat your head but his chest went heavy at the sight of you flinching
“Y/n?”
You knew he wouldnt hurt you but you couldnt stop the slight tremble
“Im sorry tanaka”
A weak smile appeared on his face
“It’s fine y/n. i’ll take you home, okay?”
You just nod your head and neither of you talk the rest of the ride
A few days go by and you can feel the distance between you and tanaka growing
Its so noticeable that the others in the office can feel the awkwardness between the two of you
Tanaka suddenly stood up from his seat which startled you but he quickly rose his hands
“Woah sorry didnt mean to scare you”
He said it with such a sad smile on his face that it almost hurt to even look at him
“Ill be back in a moment, gotta use the bathroom”
You nodded your head as he left and let out a sigh
You knew he was just doing business
This was his job
It just shocked you to see the man thats been so kind to you to look...like that
Tanaka on the other hand knew this would happen eventually
He washed his face in the sink and looked up at his reflection
‘Remember your place. They deserve better’
He wiped off his face before heading back to his office only to see you not there
His heart just drop not seeing you there
“y/n?!”
He was about to bolt out of there but as soon as he turned around he bumped right into you
You fell onto the ground and the papers you were holding scattered around everywhere
You both just looked at each other for a moment
“Tanaka--”
Before you could say anymore he scooped you into his arms and you could feel the slight tremble in his shoulders before he quickly pulled away once he realized what he was doing
“Sorry y/n i dont know what came over me”
He started help to pick up the papers you dropped but before he could get too far you pulled him into a hug
He was frozen on the spot at feeling your touch
The warmth from your hands made his heart beat erratically
“Im sorry tanaka”
Your arms tightened around him
Youd seen so many sides of him
How clumsy he was
How kind he could be
Youve also seen how scary he could be and honestly it still shocked you
But you want to believe in him
The him thats been nothing but gentle with you
You could hear him let out a shaky breath before pulling you into his chest
After that your relationship with tanaka went back to normal
Or at least as normal as it could have been
Ever since that day youve started to notice how your heart speeds up whenever you look at him
Or the butterflies in your stomach when he smiles at you
He was careful to not let you see the mafia side of things anymore
You appreciate the thought but youd be lying if you said it didnt worry you when he came to work bandaged or bruised
Today was one of those days where tanaka had picked you up with some visible injuries
The cut on his face looked fairly fresh and without realizing it you reached up and gently ran your thumb over it
“Um what are you doing y/n”
Not that tanaka hated this
He felt his heart flutter at your touch
“You know, i dont mind helping you if you need it”
He smiled and took your hand off of his face
“Thank you y/n but im fine”
Just knowing that you cared was enough for him
‘I love you’
They were words he couldnt say
But he knew this life wasnt for you and he couldnt force you to come live in it
A few weeks go by and you feel like every time you get close to him he pulls back to just keep it barely within the realm of just friends
But that was fine as long as you could stay near
It was another one of those days where tanaka was off doing mafia business so noya kept you company
He always had his guard up but he seemed to take a liking to you
“Do you like tanaka”
The question caught you so off guard you dropped your pen
You looked up at him
“Is it that obvious?”
Noya kept working on whatever was in front of him not even sparing you a glance
“Painfully”
You could feel your embarrassment rising
“But if it makes you feel any better i think he likes you too so promise me...make him happy”
Before you could say anything back noyas phone went off and he immediately answered
His eyes went wide and his head whipped towards you before hanging up and dragging you somewhere
“Noya! Where are we going?”
He rushed you into a car and he took the wheel before driving off to who knows where
“Where are we?”
He got out of the car and opened your door
You were at an apartment complex from the look of it
“We’re at tanakas apartment hurry up”
You immediately got out and followed after him and you almost felt your legs give out seeing the state tanaka was in
Bloody and battered
Hinata was sitting next to his bed with his arms crossed
“Idiot rushed in despite not having a gun”
Noya rolled his eyes
“You know he doesnt like carrying one whyd you let him go alone?”
“Not my fault he didnt stop to think”
They kept talking to each other and went into the other room leaving you both alone
His breathing seemed stable as he slept but tears escaped your eyes as you took a seat next to him
Noya left you with tanaka and told you to take care of him
“He’ll try to tell you hes okay. Dont listen to him hes a fucking liar so take good care of him for me”
It was funny but it almost sounded like a goodbye
Tanaka woke up later that night only to see you sitting next to him with tear stains on your cheeks
The thought of you shedding tears because of him both hurt and warmed his heart
He reached up to wipe your face despite the pain he felt
Your cheeks fit perfectly within his hand and he found it cute how you leaned into his touch subconsciously
He couldnt move much but this is all he needed
You woke up before he did that next morning and decided to make some breakfast for the both of you
When you came back in he was just waking up
“Good morning tanaka”
The smile on your face as the sunlight trickled in through the window made him feel at ease
This...this was the life he longed for
“Morning”
He tried to sit up but flinched while doing so
You rushed to his side and set the food down before helping him up
“Dont push yourself. Youre still pretty banged up”
You changed his bandages for him every evening after that
“I can do this myself you know”
He said it with a light laugh
He was starting to get back on his feet and regained most of his movement and strength
“I know but...id like it if you would rely on me just a bit more. I know i cant do much but i can do this”
He didnt say anything back to you after that
In all honesty he didnt want to do it himself
Every time your hand even brushed over his skin it felt like he was on fire
Even the scars that have long since healed throbbed at your touch
His heart beat so hard against his chest that he was afraid that you could hear it
“There all done! Hope that wasnt too bad”
‘Dont smile at me’
‘Youre far too precious’
‘I dont know what ill do if you look at me like that’
He really was planning to let you go, he was fine with just keeping you at an arms length away but now he knew he was in too deep
You got up to put the first aid kit away but he quickly pulled you into his bed with him and he held you tight against his chest
His face was buried into the crook of your neck
He didnt know what he wanted anymore
He wanted to keep you safe but he couldnt guarantee that with him being in the mafia
He hated it
This life wasnt the one he wanted anymore
The life he wanted was with you
Slowly, he rose his head to look at you
“Run away with me y/n”
Your eyes widened in pure shock
“What...what did you just say?”
You couldnt believe what he just said
His eyes were serious though
“Run away with me. I dont want this life anymore. I want to give you the life you deserve. One filled with happiness and laughter where you dont have to worry about things like if ill come home the next day or not. One where you arent targeted. I love you y/n. I love you so much so please, run away with me or so help me god ill just take you”
He held you so tight that it felt like he might break at any sudden movement
You wrapped your arms around him and held him gently against you so you wouldnt hurt any of his wounds
“Then take me away”
That was all tanaka needed to let go of any reservations that were holding him back up
He kissed you with everything hes been bottling up until this moment
Your lungs burned as pulled away, both out of breath but hungry for more
“I hope you know Im not letting you go. Youre stuck with me now”
You laughed and kissed his forehead
“I wouldnt have it any other way”
That night was spent in each others arms, both of you longing for the others touch and neither of you wanting to be apart for even a second
Noya visited the apartment a few days later only to be met with complete silence
A knowing smile appeared on his face as he shook his head
He knew wherever you two were you were both happy
Because he knew you would keep your promise to him
65 notes · View notes
blazeismyname · 9 months ago
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AUGH YOU JUST KEEP FUELING MY SILLY HYPERFIXATION.
BEFORE I GET INTO MORE! I ANNA SAY THAT I KINDA WANT TO WRITE THIS? IM SETTNG A DEADLINE FOR A DIFFERENT STORY AND IF I CAN GET IT IN BY THEN THEN ILL DEF WRITE THIS!!!
So, without further ado, in order of your points, tome for hyperfixation rants
Yeye, Gaston proposing! Like, at least in the musical (again, bringing that up), he makes it a whole entire REALLY awkward song. Like, full on him telling Belle he's gonna make her a housewife with a bunch of children who are gonna all be boys. I think for Marius, it'll be a million times more tame because bad at villain + basic respect. And, consider, Brian following it with "Take a piss fuck boy". And Carmilla would definitely be so proud when she finds out. Probably from remark from Marius after hes over Brian like "Rmemebr when you told me to take the piss and called me a fuck boy?"
Yeah, I was thinking about the entire getting Camrilla committed thing. Doesn't really fitt.... umm, I'm trying to remember what Belle sees in the mirror during the play. I think it's him running through the woods to find her himself? So maybe Carmilla just doesn't return after that and then isn't able to thus calm the crowd?
SO MY WHOLE THING WITH NASTYA AND CAMILLLA!!!! My whole idea was that Carmilla was watching from some upstairs window, and Nastya like, pretends to cast a spell and throws out some sort of like, finally crushed bone glitter while Carmilla actually does the spell.
Oh, no doubt Marius played the violin. I think that EVERYONE pitched in. Lumim (Lumiere Tim) was strumming a damn guitar with his candlestick hands or something-
AND YES!!! THEY NEED A MONTH!!! I was ignoring the whole few days thing and was just acting like it'd be a good amount of time because I firmly believe with these two, a lot more time is gonna be needed.
TS PROMPTLY KNOCKING MARIUS OUT IS SO FUNNY- What if the "safe" place is Carmilla and Brian's house LMAO-
SLAMS MY FIST AGAINST THE TABLE. TS NOT BEING NOTICABLE SINCE IT'S LITERALLY A FUCKING TOY SOLDIER IS SO GENUIS I A POLIETLY SHAKING YOU AROUND LIKE A RAGGEDY DOG TOY OF A DUCK /POS/POS/POS
THEM FIGHTING IN THE RAIN OYGH! ESPECIALLY IF ITS SUPER STORMY AND BRIAN KNOWS HOW JONNY FEELS ABOUT STORMS QND IS FREAK8NG OUT LIKE "He's probably so scared... AND GOING TO DIE! MARIUS! TIM- WHOEVER!"
AND MARIUS SOBBING- ugh- I can just- ugh- he's scared and upset and worried, and TS isn't listening until it freezes, and he's sees the expression on its face and then sobs into TS... and TS end up hugging back as Brian dashes with Jonny in his arms, also sobbing his eyes out
Creature Jonny will always win. It's a creature, Jonny. For the symbolism, he gets a brief moment of male patterned baldness and half his hair falls out but he grows it out again eventually. And Brian is all for it (if not teasing Jonny a little after Jonny looses some hair) (JONNY KNEELING ON THE GROUND, HOLDING THE FALLEN HAIR, SHOUTING AT THE FUCKING OUTER GODS BECAUSE HE VERY MUCH WANTED TO STAY HAIRY, KEEPS HIM AND HIS BF NICE AND WARM!!!)
The bookkeep being blind is.. AGH, I love it so much. AND TH PARALLELS TO FRAKENSTEIN. LISTEN, I MAY HAVE ONLY WATCHED ANALYSIS THAT WENT THROUGH THE PLOT, BUT I STILL UNDERSTAND IT AND I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOURE DOING AND ITS MAKING ME SO HAPPY AUTISM RIGHT NOW, YOU LITERALLY DONT UNDERSTAND
To explain further what the wind-up key was, it was supposed to show how short time was turning on the rose to the point where Clocksworth was one sentience removal from being a clock. Thus, this would stress Lyf out MONUMENTALLY because he literally doesn't know if he'll be alive from one second to the next. I don't think Marius would immediately be able to understand what the wind-up key is and why it's upsetting Lyyf, but he would know that he cares about the clock dude and needs to comfort him.
Purring Jonny was considered, I was just withholding it for a later date. Glad to know you're in my mind. BUT YES. AND THERE HAS TO BE SOME SILLY SCENE WHERE BRIAN HEARS IT AND JUST IS LIKE "shit, that's cute"
OH MY JON, AND THE CASTLE FELING IT. LIKE, AURORA IS SO UPSET BECAUSE THIS IS SOMEONE SHE KNOWS AND JONNYIS BITTER ABD PISSED FOR PICKING A FLOWER OR SOMETHING AND THEN SHE HEARS THE DESPERATE CRIWS OF A SON AND IS JUST COMPETELY JUST, SAD AND SLIGHTLY PISSED AT JONNY (she refuses to comfort him and help him through the castle till he genuinely says sorry). I imagine that Ashes is like, "You feel it too, right? She's not happy. Jonny really did it this time, " and Tim, Bertie, Lyf, Ivy, and Raph aren't up to their normal shenanigans and are all solemnly like "Yeah. We feel it".
EXTRA STUFF EVEN THOUGH THIS IS GOING ON LONG
"But he's-" "The most interesting boy in town! That makes him the best..."
BRIAN. SINGING. THE BEGINNINF SONG. AND LIKE, IN THE MOVIES AND STUFF THE OTHER VULLAGERS ARE SINGING BUT INSTEAD ITS JUST WHISPERS AND BRIAN IS SINGIN AND DOING HIS THING
The 3 ladies swooning over Gaston have to make it in. I don't care who. I don't care how. I just think that Marius either hired them to be his ego boost or dated them and they're not over him. I just think it'd be funny
Anyways, this took like an hour, and I started watching Beauty and the Beast, so I can kinda be a little more versed, but I forgot sk I gotta get back to that... and also, no nap for me cause of this silly hyperfixation- bye
Beauty and the Beast, but it's the Mechanisms.
Jonny must be the beast because feral Jonny and the whole heart thing... prove me wrong.
Tim or Brian is Belle.
Rest of the Mechs are the servants in the Beast's house. With an exception for Marius as Gaston cause I can totally fucking see it. He would suck at it though because it's Marius. And also, short Marius HC.
This is probably not new. But it's been brewing in my head for a good few months, ever since I put my Mechs OC in the iconic Belle dress.
210 notes · View notes
peachiikawa · 4 years ago
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Caged Bird | Prince!Oikawa Tooru x Reader
a/n: if you know anything about fairytales then you might realize that the reader has the flute of the pied piper, though modified for the story. been watching a lot of once upon a time and got the idea from the neverland arc. hope you enjoy!
word count: 1.9k
genre: fantasy, romance
trigger warnings: reader gets hurt a bit but nothing graphic
summary: oikawa has always lived a lonesome life in the cage that is his castle. one day he sneaks out and a beautiful melody leads him to you, a traveling musician. oikawa is about to find out that his luck is going to change for the better.
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oikawa gazed out over the town from his balcony
he let out a long sigh as he grew bored from his studies
“why the long face trashykawa?”
his bestfriend and knight walked up next to him and leaned against the railing
“oh you know, just bored of being in this castle. theres a whole town of people out there and im stuck in here. gets tiring after a while”
iwaizumi listened to his friend and nodded along to what he was saying
“then sneak out for a day”
oikawas eyes widened
“youd help me sneak out?”
“only if you come back by sundown”
so oikawa grabbed his cloak and thanks to iwas help got out of the castle
despite being born and raised in this town oikawa had no idea where he was
and after about ten minutes he was completely and utterly lost
until he heard the faint sound of a flute
he followed the sound until he ended up in the mostly cleared out town square where he saw you playing a small wooden flute for those who were present, though you had no audience
everyone walked past you as if you were invisible like you werent playing such a beautiful song
he approached you slowly and listened until you finished your performance
“that was really good”
you looked up at him and smiled
“always a pleasure to play for those who need it”
the bright smile on your face felt warm and inviting
like he was meant to be here
“would you like to take a seat next to me?”
you gestured to the spot next to you and he gladly took it
“so...whats your story”
hes hesitant to answer your question
“ill tell you mine if you tell me yours”
you set your flute down in your bag next to you
“well first of all my names y/n and my life is nothing too interesting. im a traveling performer and play my flute as a way to pass time and help those who need it. always come across the most interesting people this way”
traveling. thats something oikawa could only dream of
“so cmon now tell me about you”
he peaked at you through his hood
“ok but dont make a big commotion..im oikawa tooru”
you laughed a bit
“thats funny you share the same name as the prince”
you stopped laughing when you saw the serious look in his eyes
“oh..oh! im so sorry for being so rude!”
you started to scramble around when he grabbed your wrists to stop your movements
“shh yes im the prince but stop flailing people are starting to look”
once you had calmed down he went on
“ive been confined to my castle my whole life and stuck to certain rules i have to follow. it seems like even if i catch a break something else comes along. i have to stay this perfect image because im the prince and it just gets so lonely. its as if im a bird trapped in a cage and theres no way out”
ah so there it is
the reason he could hear your flute
you picked a flower that was growing next to you and placed it in his hair as you spoke
“im sorry your lifes been like that but oikawa, if i may be so bold, even a caged bird will become wise enough to break free. the dream of flying is too great to resist”
Once you had properly placed the flower you smiled at him before standing up from your spot and grabbing your bag
you then held your hand out to him
but he couldnt gather his thoughts
you were so bright it was almost blinding
“now cmon! lets go have some fun!”
he looked at the hand held out to him
and with a leap of faith, he took it
he was going to get out of this cage, this perpetual cycle
and finally add some meaning to his life
day after day you two spent your time together
oikawas days that were once filled with hollow words and empty actions were now filled with happiness
filled with you
and everyday slowly but surely he was falling for you
passing glances turned into prolonged gazes
his heart could no longer stay still around you
you became the key to his happiness
but for now...he had to be content with just being next to you
it would be too selfish otherwise
to ask you to stay with him here in the kingdom...he could never trap you like that
“so what are we doing today y/n?”
you were strolling through the town on a quiet sunday afternoon like you had the last few sundays
“how about we go to the bakery? theyre usually busy but since its sunday i bet its not as packed and then i want to take you somewhere”
he was curious as to what you had in store but decided against asking questions
so you two got some baked goods and headed out towards the woods
“cmon we’re almost there”
you pushed some branches and shrubs out of the way
and one eventually hit him in the face
“watch it y/n! i keep getting wacked by you”
you just chuckled a bit which oikawa had found adorable in itself
it made his heart slow just hearing it
“just come on!”
eventually you two made it to a clearing over a beautiful lake
he didnt know that there was something like this so close by
he was absolutely amazed by it
“take a seat oikawa! we can rest and eat here!”
this moment was just too perfect to him
with you here he felt as if nothing bad could happen
that if he only could see your smile everything would be alright
being content with just being at your side...was no longer and option
he knew that if he wanted this he needed to take his chance
“y/n”
your eyes were full of life and he couldnt help but feel so happy next to you
and before he knew it he was closing the gap between the two of you with a hand gently cradling your cheek
but right before you two could kiss you were ripped away from him
“dont you dare touch the prince commoner!”
oikawa frantically looked around as many of his guards came out of the brush
“get your hands off of them!”
you were pressed to the ground and the sight almost broke his heart
“sorry your highness but we’re under strict orders to bring you back and throw whoever was seducing you to leave the castle into the dungeon”
the guard that had been on you lifted you up like you were a sack and bound you by rope
you gave oikawa a final smile before you were taken away even though you were so banged up that it made him want to puke
he was speechless
this is what he was talking about
being so controlled and monitored made him feel so small and helpless
and he absolutely abhorred it
“your highness your mother is waiting for you in the throne room”
oikawa was beyond upset
this isnt how he wants to live
“mother how could you throw the only good thing in my life away!”
his mother sneered at his words
“only good thing? what need to you have for that filthy peasant! and how dare you cast me aside as if i hadnt given you everything you own, everything you are is because of me! i will not allow for any of this nonsense! now go wash up. and dont you dare ever leave the castle again and i forbid you from seeing that nasty peasant again. wasting your time with such a person...”
he gritted his teeth and was about turn to leave
his emotions were running too high
he wasnt himself and he knew it
but even so...he wont allow it to end like this
he was going to end it on his terms
“no”
“what did you say?”
he stood his ground
“i said no mother. im going to live the way i want and with who i want. ill gladly give up my title because frankly, i never wanted it in the first place. and dont you ever call y/n filthy or nasty again. their so incredibly kind and full of joy and laughter. i can only hope to be like that one day. so ive decided that im leaving. with y/n.”
as soon as the doors shut behind him he let out the breath he didnt even know he was holding
but it also felt as if there was a giant weight off of him now
“im coming y/n dont you worry”
it had been a couple hours since you were brought to your cell
you didnt have any major injuries, just a few cuts and scratches from when you were body slammed to the ground
“do you mind if i play?”
you pulled out your flute and the guard nodded
“thank you!”
you started playing and filled the cell you were in with a relaxing tune
“why do you play if it doesnt make noise?”
you stopped and looked at the spiky haired man who stood outside your cell
“it takes a certain person to appreciate its music”
he just looked at you as if you were crazy
but you continued anyways
until you heard frantic running coming from down the hall
“iwa you gotta let them out”
oikawa was panting trying to catch his breath
“dude no offense but your mom would kill me and you if i just let them out”
oikawa grabbed the key from iwaizumis waist before he even realized what had happened
“dont worry about it iwa. and dont worry about me. today i start my new life. it was good knowing you buddy”
they gripped hands the way they always had. A solemn but knowing look was shared between them
“if i had known me letting you leave the castle one time would lead to this...i would have done it a lot sooner. good luck out there bud”
oikawa quickly turned to you and helped you off of the ground
“you ready to run?”
he cupped your cheek and ran his thumb over one of the small cuts
hed be sure to treat that later
you nodded and leaned into his hand
“are you sure this is what you want?”
you were happy to leave with him
its more than you could ever ask for
“y/n youre the only person thats made me feel free. and by doing this i will be.”
you two finally got to share the kiss you had been deprived of and not only was it full of love but also full of hope for your future
“then lets go”
and you two sprinted off to your next adventure together
the flute you possessed was one he could no longer hear the sound of after that day
for it was enchanted, only to be be heard by those who were lost and lonely
with you he was neither anymore
and he couldnt be any happier than living out the rest of his days with you as a free man, a bird outside of its cage
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madame-butterfly-knife · 3 years ago
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gimme a 🖊 about Jayden because he has taken over my brain recently
oh don't worry he has also given me Brainrot actually which is a perfect fucking coincidence anyways! Jayden Kojima. funky lil dude. i know you know him Cut but others dont so ill give the rundown. i like bulletpoints so im gonna use those - never knew his parents, basically adopted by some military school because they had nowhere else to put him and a bunch of others - turned out to be really fucking good at stuff - so they made him into a teen spy! - ...by isolating him from others and indoctrining him into a thought process of blind obedience
- guy has the cover identity of a dumbass professional video gamer to justify all the crazy tech and money he has just lying around - eventually he ends up in a series of events that lead to him being cut off from his handlers and ending up in some random camp with a bunch of other young adults his age - where he realizes "wow. what the fuck. what the fuckkkkkkkkk" - tl;dr he begins to question his orders for once in his life and breaks away from his lifetime conditioning and ruthlessness other shit - in his cover identity he like. blatantly misuses slang. this was done so i could piss off my friends in discord RP. i have done an amazing job because every time i write dialogue for him i get death threats because of him saying that something is "cringe and unpoggers"
- related to that prior bulletpoint the first time i used him in an RPG the mods told me that his speech was "absolutely fucking stupid" but not in a fun way so i have made people suffer in both forms by his cursed speech patterns
- i dialed it down eventually dw - despite his last name he has never played a SINGLE metal gear game in his life. or any kojima game. i ended up bs'ing a more tragic reason why but when i created him that was like, his only reason to exist. so i could make the eventual punchline that he didnt know shit about solid snake - he likes bright colors. every oc of mine is contractually forced to like them because i absolutely abuse bright colors like im some 2007 scene kid rawr XD
- he is dependent on energy drinks. he has a Monster every day and its a miracle he isn't dead. he once mixed takis and monster into a Hell Drink that i am honestly tempted to try for myself now
- yet he can't handle a fucking toberone probably. not even one of the big ones
- old habits die hard so you could probably get him to do anything if he trusts you as long as you just ask. you dont even have to be nice
- he looks like this
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- im so bored
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blookmallow · 3 years ago
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hi uhh this video about Anxiety Is Good Actually keeps being on my dash and its making me mad so this is me breaking it down 
if this kind of thinking helps you im not trying to destroy your coping methods but it just feels so far removed from what the actual experience of anxiety is 
i understand the value in trying to redirect negative self-thoughts into positive ones ( “i worry about people all the time” --> “i care deeply about people i love”) but there’s ways to do that without just, denying there’s anything wrong?? this just feels like the. whole issue with romanticizing mental illness/not moving toward positive recovery because I Dont Need To Change Myself when its actively harming you (not to mention “anxiety is good and helpful” is uh, not a great thing to say to someone with anxiety, bc then you get more anxiety spirals of ‘wait if this is how anxiety is for other people then whats wrong with me, i must be doing something wrong. i shouldnt need help and be having breakdowns bc apparently its easy and even beneficial to other people’ i dont need to be anxious about how im doing anxiety wrong lmfao) 
- where is this “anxiety means you’re intelligent” claim coming from. says Who. hyperanalyzing and overthinking constantly doesn’t make you Smarter, anxiety brain isn’t “im carefully and logically considering all the possibilities” it’s your brain trapping itself in a hell spiral of “what if what if what if” to the point where it becomes increasingly difficult to come to any conclusion at all. it’s not “considering all possible outcomes rationally” it’s “im spending 30 minutes worrying about the least likely thing to happen in a way that is not constructive and i need to recognize that and get myself back on track with whats actually relevant” 
my critical thinking is actively impaired by my anxiety. i sometimes have to go take a nap for 3 hours to reset my brain before i can even approach a problem because my brain is just going “no no no no no too big too scary i cant i cant i cant i cant i cant” too loudly for me to even consider any options at all. “anxiety can make you better at decision making!” is the biggest fucking bullshit claim i have ever seen. anxiety PREVENTS me from decision making. it makes decision making a huge ridiculous ordeal when it really doesn’t need to be. i have to go through a whole process of quieting my anxiety down and working around it in order to do anything at all. its like if you had an alarm system for your house but it went off just constantly all the time for no reason and you have to keep getting up to turn it off. eventually you’re going to have a hard time being able to identify when it’s actually going off because someone’s breaking into your house and when it’s just Doing That Thing Again and you keep losing track of what you were doing because you keep getting interrupted by having to turn that stupid alarm off again
anxiety isn’t “constantly looking for how to solve things” its “constantly thinking of new problems that could exist” in a way that is not beneficial. ill be sitting here feeling sick and completely disoriented for an hour because What If The Customer Service Guy On The Phone Thought I Was Stupid. Maybe I Am Stupid. Maybe I Was Accidentally Rude In Some Way I Never Considered And He’s Going “Wow What A Stupid Rude Bitch That Was” for literally no reason. sure that also means “i have empathy for other people and i want to be polite and not make someone else’s life difficult” but im mostly just thinking about How Stupid I Am, You Stupid Fucking Idiot which is not helpful
like if i recognize “this is my anxiety talking” and just. silenzio bruno. ignore that, put that away, move on, focus. that’s a much more healthy way to cope than indulging it on another spiral of “how is this Actually My Little Anxiety Buddy Trying To Help Me” trying to find some meaning and purpose in it isn’t going to help. anxiety is irrational. that’s what it Is. it’s okay and actually healthy to realize that. my best coping skill is to just say “okay, that was a brain glitch. that wasn’t my fault. im not stupid, my brain just has bad wiring. ignore that. keep going” 
- “we can think of it as our anxiety giving us an extra energy boost to get things done” fucking WHAT?? i cant get anything done because of my anxiety. i will bury myself in 19 blankets and stare at tumblr for 5 hours because my brain Won’t Start and i feel sick and worried and shaky for literally no reason instead of like, getting up and cleaning my room. and then i spend another hour thinking about how useless i am for not cleaning my room. i can only get things done at all bc i have medication that makes my anxiety quieter 
- they have this cute little image of “anxiety” telling you to tell the store person you need more time to decide as if it’s there shouting solutions and advice when really it’s more like “GO GO GO GO YOU HAVE TO ANSWER NOW YOU’RE TAKING TOO LONG YOU’RE HOLDING UP THE LINE YOU’RE BEING THAT GUY HURRY HURRY HURRY HURRY IF YOU DON’T DECIDE SOMETHING IN 3 SECONDS EVERYONE IN THE STORE WILL HATE YOU AND YOU WILL DIE” its not constructive, it’s not a helpful little advice friend, it’s just random loud static you have to work around constantly. of course it’s okay to need a second to process because of your anxiety but that’s not what anxiety Does. i cant ask for a second to process because my anxiety is so loud i cant think and it has convinced me if i dont act normal Right The Fuck Now everyone will hate me forever. i guess a more effective illustration would be like, the Anxiety entity going “AAAAAAA” and instead of you thinking “im stupid and terrible because i cant control that thing” you go “hang on a second, i need a minute” and you step away to calm it down. instead of. the anxiety just offering you a solution. for itself. i dont understand this video 
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like. what the fuck are you talking about. “you can do it!! you got this!” is literally the exact fucking polar opposite of what anxiety brain is like
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violetnotez · 4 years ago
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I am in serious need of soft hours headcanons with Izuku. I wanna pamper him with love, hold his cheeks and kiss him tenderly, hold his hands and draw circles on them with my thumb, hug him to my chest to cuddle him, pet his fluffy hair, just tell him how much I appreciate and believe in him. Forehead kisses, cheek kisses, nose kisses, ALL THE KISSES DAMN IT! 😭 I. APPRECIATE. THIS. CUTE. BROCOLI. BOY. Help me plz 😭 I mean, if you can 😂 I know you're very busy with matchups (btw kudos to those
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OMG Im so sorry this was so much later! I was really need some good Izuku loving hours when I wrote this, so I hope you like it! Also sorry it was posted at an UNGODLY HOURS I cant have a normal posting scheudele no matter how hard I try!
ALSO I REALIZED U ASKED FOR HEADCANNONS IM SO SORRY!!!!!!!!!
Izuku x reader
⤷ Genre: Fluff
⤷ Word Count: 1600+
⤷ Warnings: cursing if ya squint
⤷ Synopsis:   You have been noticing Midoriya has been a little down lately, so you take it upon yourself to cheer him up by sneakily taking his favorite notebook and writing cute messages in his notes, and of course, his reaction is priceless!
This fic is for the @bnhabookclub bingo event!  Here’s my masterlist to see all my work for this event!
Bingo Slot: Doodles On Their Notebook
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Your hands were frantically shoving through Midoriya’s things, the collection of All Might merchandise staring at you with piercing eyes as you continued with your search.
Being Izuku’s girlfriend, you pretty much knew Midoriya like the back of your hand. So when he wasn't acting like himself, becoming more sulky and training more, you knew something was seriously wrong with the greenette.
But of course, the green haired boy was determined to prove you wrong, always saying “Im just fine!” or “Dont worry about me angel!” whenever you brought the topic up.
It just- didnt feel right to you...he seemed so sad, so burdened with something inside of him, his green eyes no longer shining like they used to and his body looking as if it was carrying a tremendous weight on his shoulders.
You had decided enough was enough, and that you would remind your boyfriend of how amazing he was by writing affirmations all over his favorite notebook in order to uplift his spirits-if only you could find the damn thing.
“The hell is that book,” you cursed under your breath, your hands now lifting up every textbook on his desk.
“What book are you looking for puppy?”
You felt a spike of coldness rush through your body, your eyes wide as you turned around to look at your confused looking boyfriend.
His hair looked slightly wet, a towel folded underneath his arms and his signature white shirt a little damp from a shower he probably had taken after training. His cheeks were still a little pink, making his freckles a little more prominent, and in any other circumstance you would have pounced on him with kisses from his cuteness.
But-he had just caught you red handed, looking through his stuff...the hell were you gonna get out of this?
“I-uh,” you stumbled out, trying to find a good lie, “I-I lost a notebook, and I-I think it might be here? From when I came over to study?”
Izuku didnt seem to notice your obvious fluster, his eyes downcast and his expression preoccupied.
“I havent seen any of your notebooks lying around...I’ll look for it, dont worry! We’ll find it eventually,” the boy tried to send you a reassuring smile, but it didnt work very well. 
It was sad, tired, worried...just not the usually reassuring Izuku you knew.
All thoughts of your plan filtered out of your mind, your body instantly walking over to the boy. Your hand wrapped around his arm gingerly, some parts rougher than others from his scars as you gently trailed your hand down to rest in his palm.
“‘Zuku, are you feeling okay?” you asked, your voice sweet as you looked up at him with wide eyes. “Is something on your mind? You seem-sad,”
Midoriya sighed, his green orbs looking at you with love and warmth. 
Even if he was looking down, it was reassuring to know he still looked at you like that- at least it wasn't you who was causing this...but what?
“Im sorry puppy, I didn't realize I was worrying you so much,” he said, his voice low as he rubbed his thumb against your hand. “Its just-I-I feel like I'm not improving as much as I should be. I've had this power for some time now, and I can barely use it to half its potential...the others are improving so much, especially Kachan..I just- sometimes I can't help- but think that maybe I'm not cut out for this…”
You tilted your head in confusion, your lips pursed and eyes full of empathy.
You were so relieved to finally know what was eating at your boyfriend so much, but it hurt you to know he was fighting with such insecurities All you wanted to do was love the hell out of him right now and smother him with cuddles and kisses.
“Oh, ‘Zuku,” you sighed out, your free hand finding refuge against Midoriya’s cheek. The boy quietly nuzzled himself into your touch, his skin soft and warm against your palm. “Is that what was bothering you?”
“Yeah-I-I know, it seems silly, its just-”
“No, it doesnt,” you quickly interjected him, a reassuring smile playing on your lips. “Everybody doubts themselves sometimes, no matter how good or bad they are at what you do.
“You're still just training, you're doing everything you can to be the best, more than what most people do in their whole lifetime. Yeah, others are going to improve faster than you, and others are going to improve slower. Just focus on yourself, and your goals, and don't forget what you’ve accomplished. You done so much with yourself Izuku, more than you would ever know, just don't forget that kay?”
Izuku face light up, his expression washing with relief. He instantly buried you into a hug, his taught arms wrapping around you and squeezing you slightly. You smiled at the big softie your boyfriend was, your hands cuddling his body close to you. You felt the boy chuckle slightly, his voice sounding flustered yet more relaxed than before
“What would I do without you?” 
“Probably train until you passed out,” you giggled, a smile gracing your lips, “but seriously Izuku, dont be so hard on yourself, your doing just fine,”
“Okay, I-Ill try,” he stuttered out.
Izuku held you like that for another moment, you both relishing the feeling of the other against your arms. You felt Midoriya pull your body gently away from his, his face facing yours as he placed his hands on your shoulders.
He finally looked a little less solemn, some of the weight being taken off of his shoulders..but that tell tale look of sadness was still there.
“I-I know you were looking for your notebook...but did you maybe want to- stay for a little bit?”
You felt your insides light up from warmth, a grin growing on your face.
God, why did he have to go and be so cute?
“If you want cuddles, ‘Zuku, all you have to do is ask...”
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:・゚
Deku stepped into class the next day, his body almost in a trance as he sat himself down at his usual seat.
Last night was healing for him, just cuddling and having you in his arms, but reality hit him in the face the next day. Those inner demons weren’t quite destroyed, and he realized he still had to battle them, even after the night with you.
He sighed, his shoulders feeling tired as he rummaged through his backpack, pulling out his notebook. 
Mind as well study as he waited for class to start…
He flipped through the first few pages, trying to find the last place he was reviewing, until he noticed something-there was new writing, unlike his own, scrawled in the empty gaps of his notes..
Izuku cocked his eyebrow, his fingers dragging against the message:
“I love how sweet you are, no matter what comes your way.”
Izuku felt his cheeks rise with heat-who wrote that?
He flipped the next page, finding another message:
“Your freckles are adorable and I’d kiss each and every one if I could.”
God, how could these make him so flustered? He felt his whole face rise in heat, beginning to recognize the handwriting as your own. He began to flip through each page, a message almost on every one, all about him:
“You are so strong.”
“I love when you get flustered.”
“Your going to accomplish your dreams and more,”
“Your hair is so cute pls dont ever change it,”
He chuckles at that last one, his digits racking through his locks. His classmates were beginning to file into class, the room becoming much louder than before.
Izuku turned around, his cheeks on fire as he hoped nobody saw him get so flustered-until his eyes met yours.
You were currently talking to Mina and Kaminari a few seats behind, your body sitting on a desk as you watched Izuku with waiting eyes.
Once he made eye contact though, he knew for certain it was you who had written the sweet notes in his notebook- your face lit up with relief, a smile gracing your lips as you sent a wink his way.
Midoriya couldn't help but let a squeak slip out of his lips, his body swiveling around quickly- god, he was too flustered around you!
Midoriya heard Aizawa enter, all his classmated quickly taking their seats and going silent.
He listened to the instruction, opening his notebook to a fresh page to write down notes...but he found himself flipping back to those few pages, rereading every message. It uplifted his spirits, made him feel loved, and he felt so lucky to have someone as caring as you love him back.
。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:・゚★,。・:*:・゚☆ 。・:*:・゚
It was now the end of class, the bell ringing daintily around the room as everyone bombarded out to the lunch hall.
You on the other hand stayed behind, walking over to Midoriya as he slowly put his books away in his bag.
“So, did you like it?” you asked, a smile in your voice as you waited for your answer.
Midoriya looked up at you, his eyes wide with gratitude and his cheeks a rosy red-
Yeah, he liked it.
MIdoriya smiled, his grin wide and child-like. “I-I loved it, y/n, thank you!” he shouted, his voice dripping with gratitude.
“God,” you giggled sheepishly, “I took me forever to find that notebook after you fell asleep…”
His hand wracked into his hair again, his bright smile turning into a nervous smile
“Honestly, I don't know if I deserved all that work, but I-I really liked it-”
“Of course you deserve it Izuku!” you quickly reached for his hand, your body moving closer to his, “You are such an amazing person-everything I wrote in there was true, and will always be true.”
Izuku looked up at you, his eyes full of love and admiration. He had never been so grateful and felt so lucky to be with someone as amazing as you.
Midoriya’s cheeks began to turn red again, his body leaning in quickly towards yours. He planted a kiss on your cheeks, his skin leaving a lasting tingle on your skin.
“You know I-I love you-right...cause I do, I really really do,”
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trikxx · 4 years ago
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I try to put a lil something before the chapter cause thats what I usually do but I can think if anything😀 on to the story.
Songs for this chapter ⬇️
•shame by summer walker
•if you let me by sinead harlett
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Armoni's pov
I got up early cause I didn't want y/n to kill Shinsou for letting me drive. I have my permit and all but I still have to take my drivers test... again. Y/n doesn't trust me with the car but shes gonna have to give in soonnn.
I go into the living room and they not there anymore
So I go to Shinsou's room to get him. "SURPISE SHAW.." He wasn't in there. The last place he could be thats inside the house is y/n's room. 'God please let me going here and know that nothing happened last night even though I want a niece not yettt' I think in my head while putting my hands together.
I slowly opened the door. 'please please pleaseee' I slowly open my eyes and they are fully clothed and only facing each other "THANK THE GODS!" I accidentally yell out waking up Shinsou.
"Wtffff Armoni."
"Damn, what happened to hey, hello, good morning." I say. "Waiting in living room ill be ready in a little bit.
Shinsou's pov
I slowly slip out of y/n's bed and go to my own room and hop in the shower, brush my teeth, fix my hair and get dressed. After I finished I grabbed my keys and put on my shoes. "Lets go." I say to Armoni
"I would have let you drive y/n's truck but you know how she is." I say "Yea i know" Armoni said adjusting the seat. "Check it out so I have a automatic so you dont have to worry about all that fancy stick shift shit you thought was finna happen when you got in. Nope." I explained to Armoni everything he needed to know. "No music til you drive a mile" I say. Armoni pulled out the parking spot and out he garage and started driving.
"Damn you actually drive good." I say to Armoni. "I know its just my sister." We started driving toward y/n's parents house to take Armoni home and so I could make it back home so me and y/n could go to Sero's shop.
~Time skip~
Y/n's pov
I wake up and get in the shower not really acknowledging the fact that Shinsou and Armoni were gone out the house. The quiet was nice. I stepped and wrapped a towel around my body and staring to brush my teeth. I heard the front door open. I walk out my bathroom into my room to peek out the door.
"Oh your woke now?." Shinsou says. I tolled my eyes and  closed my door back to get dressed.
Your outfit
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I did my hair the same way I did it last night then grabbed my wallet and keys and walked out the room "We taking your car?" I ask Shinsou. "Yea." He responds. I out on my shoes and we walk out the door.
~Time skip~
We pulled up to a tattoo shop that had a sign that said '4RT' "You ready?" Shinsou said. "Wait they open?" I say. The shop looked like no one was there even though there was four cars outside besides ours.
"Naw they not open." Shinsou said side eyeing me. I rolled my eyes and got out the and Shinsou did the same.
We entered the shop and heard low music playing. "Yoooo Shinsou!" I heard Sero yell from down the hallway. "Is that the beautiful y/n?" Denki said following behind Sero. Shinsou side eyes Denki and Denki puts his hands up like this '✋🏽😐🤚🏽'
"What tats do yall want?" Sero asks. "Ima get this." Shinsou says showing Sero the picture.
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(This is the only one I could find that I liked Pinterest did me wrong yall ✋🏽🥲 ill edit it if i find sum different;-;)
"Still a minimalist I see." Sero says joking around. "And you?" Sero resumes pointing to me. "Oh I was thinking something like this."
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"Thats niceee." Sero says. "Ok I'll do y/n and you can get Shinsou." Sero says to Denki. Denki nods and leads Shinsou to his area and I got Sero's. "This your first tat or nah?" He asks. "Nah." I says showing him the dragon tattoo behind my ear that goes on to my shoulder. "Thats dope as fuck." Sero says starting the sketch for your tattoo.
(Idk how this works🧍🏽‍♀️)
~Time skip~
Third pov
Sero finished the sketch and started apply the stencil (yall know the little thing they put on the you before they actually tattoo..yea that.)
Sero turned on some music (the song at the top played first) and started tattooing. At first it hurt but soon you got use to it. "You ok?" Sero asked. "Yea." You say looking back at you phone.
~Time skip~
You here the door of the shop open. You saw a pink haired girl rush passed the room you and Sero were in. Eventually peeking her head in ti the room "Im here Sero they kept me late at the mall my bad... Y/N?!"
"Heyyoo." You say smiling at her. "We have to talk after your done ok?" She says. You nod your head at her and she skipped away. You lay your head back vibing to the music trying to ignore the pain.
"Ok Cool Kami.." Shinsou says walking into the room. "Y/n... holy shit." You look up at Shinsou then look down at the tattoo and back at Shinsou "what." You ask. "I should have let you pick my tattoo."
You raise your eyebrows and formed an straight like with your lips then nodded your head up and down slowly. "Im gonna wait in the lobby ok?" Shinsou says "ok." You say. Shinsou walks out the room and you look back down at you phone.
Shinsou's pov
I walk into the lobby and sit close to ok the desk and talk to Mina and Denki. "And bro she was like..." Denki was saying then pointed to where he was looking at.
'Woah' I see a girl come through the door." Hey! Welcome to Art. How may I accommodate you today." Mina days with a smile. "Hiii I had made an appointment." The girl says. "What was the name?" "Camie." She says.
"Alright, you can sit over there..." Mina said pointing over by me. "and Denki will be with you in a moment." Mina finishes. "Hey hottie whats your name." The girl says to me. "Shinsou. And yours?" I say looking at her.
"My names Camie." She says. "Hold on." She says getting up. She comes back with paper and a pen. "Camie?" Denki says to her. "Here." She whispers to me and hands me a piece of paper then follows Denki. I looked her up and down looking at her outfit. She winked at me before disappearing into the hallway. 'Damnnnnnn'
Camie's outfit
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"Finally out that fucking chair got damn." Y/n says stretching while walking into the lobby.
"Thats one hell of a grin Toshi." Y/n says making the "😏" face. "Hush and let me see." I say.
Y/n's pov
I show Shinsou my tattoo. "Im just fye like that." Sero says. I chuckle and start walking to pay. But Shinsou stops me "I'll pay." He says. "But.." "unt uhn." I roll my eyes and step back.
"Alright I'll see you guys." Shinsou says walk towards the door. "Byeeee" I say going after him. "Wait!" I go back in the shop. "Heres my number Mina facetime, text, call, or what ever. And we can talk." I say writing it down. "Ok! Bye Y/n!" I wave at her walking out the door and running ti the car.
"Alright I'm ready."
~time skip~
We get back to the apartment and I flop down on my bed. "Sooo tireddd." I say. I pick up my computer and check how many orders we had 'its not that bad' i think to myself closing my computer and putting it back on my nightstand.
I walk out my room to go mess with Shinsou but when I got closer to his room he was... giggling? I held in my laughter and knocked on his door. "Yo Toshi you hungry?" I say through the door. "Yea hold on." He responds back.
20 minutes later
Shinsou's pov
"Ok what did yo..." I say. 'This mf really fell alseep in 20 minutes' I think to myself. I pick y/n up and put her in her bed.
I walk into the kitchen and ordered y/n's f/f for her and something for me.
*DING*
Camie🤍: Hey Hitoshi🤗.
Hitoshi☄️: Hey👋🏽.
Camie🤍: i wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tonight and get to know each other?
Hitoshi☄️: im cool with that but where.
Camie🤍: your place?
Hitoshi☄️: I would sag yea but we would just be in my room. I have a roommate and they get kinda rowdy.
Camie🤍: Its ok. What ever you want babes😁.
Hitoshi☄️: cool.
Hitoshi ☄️: Also eat before you come over i only provide snacks.
Camie🤍:LOL. Ok☺️.
*UBEREATS NOTIFICATION THING*
|your food for HITOSHI has been delivered|
I go out the door to get the food and come straight back to the apartment. I look through and make sure everything is there. Then I put y/n's food in the refrigerator/on the counter(depends on what you picked).
~time skip~
Camie🤍: should i park on the street?
Hitoshi ☄️: yea.
I walk downstairs to let Camie in. "Hey handsome." She said and kissed me on the cheek. We went back to the apartment and into my room. "I'll be back." I say walking out the room. "Hey Shinsou." Y/n says waving at me while walking out her room.
"Hey, Your foods in the fridge." I say. "Thank you." She says hugging me then warming up her food and going back to her room. I cut off the lights in the living room and a leave the one above the sink on. Then I go back to my room with Camie.
Y/n's pov
I go back to my room and watch tv and start packing orders. Sometimes I do orders by myself just for some me time (play if you let me by sinead harnett).
*DING*
Unknown: Y/n please I miss you so much please. Im sorry I didn't mean for it to happen please just take me back ill do better please. I still love you.
Y/n: If this is who I think it is No. cause you know what you did and it really doesn't make sense that you cant get that shit into your head stop contacting me. Im not taking you back even if its the end of the world.
Unknown: please y/n
*this number you are contacting has blocked you*
———
I finished eating and went to throw my stuff away. I got in the shower did my skincare and brushed my teeth. 'I should just chill out in my room.' I think ti myself while getting out the shower and drying off.
I put on some spandex shorts and a hoodie. The pull out my sketchbook to make more designs.
———
I've been sketching for about a hour so i go to see if Shinsou wanted to watch a movie but as I got closer to the door i hear moans getting louder. 'No, he did not.' I thought to myself. I go to the living room and just turn on the tv and watch a movie alone in the dark.
About an hour late I hear him coming out the room. "That was sooo nice." I hear a girl say. She come out of the hallway where Shinsou's room is. "Who are you?" She says.
"I'm y/n." I say. "Shinsou there's a girl out here. Maybe your roommate has her over." She says.
'Is she-' "wait whats your name?" I ask her
"Camie." She says "oh, do you know Todoroki?" I say "yes i know him." She says kind of with a attitude. "Ohhh I remember youu. Aren't you his ex." She said.
"Alright are you... hey y/n." Shinsou said. "Really Hitoshi." I say getting up. "Of all the people in the world HER." I say. "What are you talking about y/n."
"You know what im talking about Hitoshi. Or do you not remember why your own best friend broke up with her boyfriend." I say. Shinsou looked like his heart dropped to his ass.
𝐅𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐡 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤
"Hey y/n its gonna be ok forget about him."Shinsou says. "Im gonna call Ace to come and get you."
Ace: Hello?
Shinsou: Hey Ace i need you to come to Y/n's house right now.
Shinsou looks at the code book you gave him for emergencies like this.
"Code...uhhh pink no wait its a purple"
Ace: Im on my way right now.
Y/n's pov
"Two years down the fucking drain for what!" i yell as Ace comforted me. "N/n you have to calm down a little." Ace says. i layed in my bed under my cover with my music blasting. My parents were on a business trip and my brother was at our Aunts house.
Me, Ace, and Shinsou heard someone knock on the door so I go to open it. "Y/n i'm sorry! It all happened so fast and I was drunk." Todoroki says. "DRUNK MY ASS SHOTO! YOU NEW WHAT THE FUCK YOU WERE DOING AND IT WASN'T A ACCIDENT." I say yelling. "Hey Y/n I got this go chill out." Shinsou says pulling me back.
I step back and then I look at his car and she was in there. I push both boys out the way and walk to the car. I snatched the door open and pulled her out the car. "SO YOU FUCKING LOVE ME RIGHT?! YOU WANT ME BACK HUH?! BULLSHIT SHOTO GET YOUR SHIT AND GO. IM DONE. AND AS FAR AS I KNOW ONCE YOU OUT YOU DICK IN HER WE WERE DONE SO GET YOUR SHIT AND LEAVE."
Todoroki grabbed Camie from you and got her back in the car. "Im sorry ill leave.".
𝐄𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤
"Damn i did it again." Camie says with a smirk on her face. "Maybe its just not meant to b..." I cut her off by gabbing her hair and slamming her on the couch.
"Say some slick shit again Camie. I fucking dare you. I will do something I didn't get to do then. Cause i dont give a fuck now. Ima let you go this is what you do to avoid getting your ass beat. Get your bag, keys, and shoes and get the fuck out this house and never come back." I say. She nods and I let her go.
Camie runs and gets her stuff and leaves the apartment. "Wtf Y/n." Shinsou says. "You know she was just gonna be a hit and kick anyway so im saving her the heartbreak." I say walking to my room. "Thats not the point y/n you didn't have to do that."
Shinsou said
"THEN WHATS THE POINT HITOSHI?!" I say. "THE POINT IS THAT YOU BROUGHT UP STUFF FROM A LONG TIME AGO." Shinsou argues back. "you know i tried to ignore the fact that you brought the girl that he cheated on me with." I say calmly. "but dont argue back. i dont want to waste your breath on this. and just to tell you ill leave for the night to give you some time to yourself." I say walking away to my room.
———
When I get into my room I feel and tear come down my face as i get out some overnight clothes. I text Mina to see if she was free.
Y/n🤍🌸: Hey Mina are you free to night
Mina🥀: Sorry babes im out with my boyfriend
——
I sighed and texted Sero
Y/n🤍🌸: Yoo Sero
Sero🤠: wsp y/n
Y/n🤍🌸: Can I crash at your place tonight? Me and Hitoshi kinda got into a fight.
Sero🤠: Sure, im still at the shop so you can come here til i close up
Y/n🤍🌸: alright cool.
——
I finished packing my bag and slip on some grey sweats and went to the door. As i was putting on my shoes Shinsou came out to the door. "You don't have to leave Y/n." He says. "Well if you dont want me to leave for then ill be leaving for myself. Ok? Cool." I says as I grab my keys off the rack and walk out the door.
👀 dont hurt me ya’ll please dont😬
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catboymingi · 4 years ago
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hurting - in this life and the next chap. 7
navi/masterlist
story masterlist
pairing: mingi x reader
genre: angst, a little bit of fluff; soulmates & reincarnation au
word count: 3.9k
warnings: dissociation resulting in some self harming behaviour (reader doesn’t realise she’s getting hurt - she’s not hurting on purpose), dealing with grief, insecurities
the realisation that someone wants your happiness more than their own can be a painful one
instead of doing anything yet, mingi decided to sleep. he wouldn’t be able to do anything right now anyway, since you were asleep, and maybe yunho had come up with a solution the next day. but it was hard, falling asleep, even though you were in his arms, because he had no idea if he should tell you about it or not. he didn’t want to make you feel like he only cared about that, about being soulmates, but he also cared about that - how could he not? it by far wasn’t his main reason for liking you, but he couldn’t deny that it did affect him. and even though he’d told you that yunho liked you, too, earlier, that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt for him to think that you might choose his best friend over him, even though he deserved it. he was just anxious, overthinking, or maybe thinking just the right amount, and that made it hard to sleep.
though he did fall asleep, eventually, because he was with you right now and he was your friend and that thought calmed him down enough to enter the land of dreams.
//
of course you noticed that something was odd with mingi the next day, and you brought it up, but he told you that he just felt a little weird being like this with you, even when you were just friends, when he was still mourning. he also told you that he was worried about you, about how you were feeling, and spent another one or two hours with you before leaving to make sure you’d know he did care about you and your wellbeing. then he left, still seeming awkward, uncertain and anxious, and you texted yunho, who was still texting mingi and trying to come up with what to do, though you didn’t know that.
[y/n]: ask mingi to come over, i dont think hes okay rn
and yunho knew, of course he knew that mingi was far from okay, so of course he would do that.
[yunho]: will do. ill update you once i know more, okay?
he didn’t want to snitch on his friend, he didn’t want to do anything hasty, he wanted to find a solution with mingi before any decisions were made. but he also didn’t want you to worry too much, so this seemed like a good compromise. he just hoped they’d actually find a solution, because this situation wasn’t exactly an easy one.
but because you had no idea what was going on you just waited, though it lasted for exactly ten minutes before you got tired of it and too anxious to sit still and you went to the shelter, hoping to calm down a little. there you stayed for several hours, until mingi messaged you, asking where you were and if he could come over, saying he was feeling better now and apologising for his odd behaviour that morning.
and because you were too soft for him you immediately agreed, waiting at the shelter until he came over to spend time with you.
//
yunho had asked him to come over, and of course he would. he really wanted to know what to do, he wanted to know how to handle things, he wanted to not fuck up. he wanted to do things right this time, he didn’t want to lose you again.
“hey”, the blond said as he opened the door for mingi, who moved into the flat wordlessly, throwing himself on the sofa with a loud groan.
“i take you still haven’t told her?”, which made the groan louder and had his friend cover his face with his hands.
“i just don’t know if i should”, he almost whined out, so incredibly unsure about everything right now. he wanted to be with you, but he was scared that if he’d tell you about this latest development you’d think he only cared about you for this soulmate business, something that wasn’t the case. while he hadn’t entirely forgotten about it it wasn’t his main motivation, his motivation was wanting to get to know you and getting to be with you and, in part, showing you that you weren’t just a poor copy of whoever you used to be, showing you that you were worth being cherished the way you were now. and because he knew that you wouldn’t let him, these next words left his mouth, something he’d thought more than he’d like to admit.
“i think you should tell her how you feel. it wouldn’t surprise me if she likes you, too, with the way the two of you are always talking. she trusts you, and i know you wouldn’t hurt her. maybe that’s better.”
“are you… trying to set us up?”, yunho asked, confused by the brunette’s words because this was the last thing he’d expected.
“that sounds horrible. i just want her to be happy, you know? and i know you wouldn’t let anyone make her sad, not even me.”
while that was true yunho wouldn’t do this to mingi, even if he did like you - something he’d noticed, but that he’d just accepted as unrequited feelings, because it was so obvious that his friend still meant so much to you.
“i mean, yeah, but you like her, don’t you? you could make her happy, too, just get your shit together first.”
mingi sighed loudly, a long, pained, resigned sigh.
“that’s the thing. she deserves better, don’t you think? better than someone that keeps fucking up because of his own baggage. i can’t promise i won’t hurt her again, and i don’t want to risk that.”
this was so thoughtful of mingi and it showed his friend that he really was trying his best, that he really did care about you, and that he’d even put his own happiness back if it would make you happier. and because he cared so much yunho couldn’t do it, wouldn’t even consider it; maybe if mingi had ignored your feelings and his concerns and just thrown himself in head first yunho wouldn’t have had these hesitations, but because the slightly shorter man cared so much he couldn’t do that. and he told mingi that.
“she doesn’t even like me that way. trust me, she doesn’t”, when mingi was about to protest, “she cares about you. she just wants you to care about her, too. why else would she still give you a chance, hm? if she didn’t care you’d long be blocked, because, in all honesty, you’d deserve it.”
“i guess”, another loud sigh. “but i won’t tell her, not yet, at least. i don’t want to hurt her”, laying down on his stomach on the (too short) couch, almost slamming his head into a pillow in frustration because he had absolutely zero idea what to do. because he wanted to be with you but didn’t know how to go about that. because life kept making things hard for you when they’d just gotten even a little easier.
“maybe you should still text her, though. she worries.”
“mh. i think i’ll go home, i need some time to think. see you, yunho. and thank you.”
and then he left, went home and showered and realised he didn’t want you to worry at all even if he still felt unsure about things, so he texted you, asking to meet up again now to show things were still okay.
//
mingi looked like he’d cried and tried to hide it when he arrived, hair slightly wet from a shower you assumed he’d taken before he got there, eyes no longer red but still slightly puffy. you had no idea what had happened, but all you could imagine was that he felt guilty because he’d told you he liked you even when it hadn’t been that long since his love had died, something you could understand. or maybe he was overwhelmed with his emotions, something you could most definitely understand, as well. still, he tried to smile at you, coming over to where you were feeding the bunnies once he’d spotted you.
“hey”, obviously still not doing all too well, something you weren’t about to question him about, especially when he was trying to smile at you anyway.
“hey”, smiling back at him, moving your attention back to the bunnies soon after so he wouldn't feel like you were staring.
“again, sorry for acting weird, i was just… feeling weird”, an awkward laugh at his lack of eloquence, but you didn’t mind at all.
“don’t worry about it.”
you knew telling someone not to worry didn’t exactly make them worry less, but it was all you could do right now, telling him that it wasn’t a big deal and trying to act as you always did around him. or, always since you started talking again.
you’d spent about an hour with mingi and he had finally relaxed when your phone buzzed with messages from yunho, several at once, something that worried you a little because the brunette was here with you right now, so you didn’t at all know what yunho could possibly be double texting about. after checking that you had the time to read and reply right now, that there were no animals running around, you unlocked your phone, clicking on the notification in order to find out what was going on.
you hadn’t expected the messages you got, though. when you read them it quickly became very obvious that yunho had no idea that mingi was with you right now, and it seemed pretty obvious that mingi had no idea about what his friend was revealing, either.
[yunho]: i know mingi hasnt told you, but your soulmate mark is gone
[yunho]: dont freak out, its fine, he isnt planning anything
[yunho]: thats why im texting, actually
[yunho]: he told me to get with you, told me that he knows i like you and that you might like me and that even if it means hes not w you at least youre happy
[yunho]: i think hes really changed from when he fucked up, hes learned, and he wants you to be happy more than anything
[yunho]: so while i do like you, i think hes good for you. i think hed make you happy. i know you still like him, and he obviously likes you, enough to try to set you up w me
[yunho]: just thought id let you know
you looked at the phone in shock, unsure what to make of this, unsure what to make of not one but two confessions in the same message, unsure what to make of all the information you’d just gotten, and you almost dropped the little device, completely out of it.
“y/n?”
the man that apparently was really, actually your soulmate seemed worried by your reaction to the messages, and when you showed him the screen he understood what had happened. he didn’t know what to say either, though, but he knew you’d have to tell yunho something, at least, shouldn’t leave him on read.
“please message him back, okay? or i can do it. and then we’ll talk, but he’ll worry if you don’t say anything.”
you nodded, still only half there, and typed up a small message.
[y/n]: mingi is here rn. well talk about it now. thank you
then you locked your phone, staring at the now black screen, completely in shock. you hadn’t even thought about it. you hadn’t even thought about the whole soulmate thing when mingi had held you, or when he’d kissed your head. all you’d thought about was how you wished someone would care about you, really, deeply care, and now you’d gotten that in one of the worst ways you could imagine, because your best friend whom you’d not see as more than a best friend had apparently confessed just like this, and the man you did like seemed to want to set you up with said best friend because he cared about you so much. everything seemed to be going wrong and you had no idea what to do and you felt yourself slowly slip away, something you’d noticed you did when you were stressed, leaving reality so you would first have to deal with things when they’d settled in logically, removing the stress of having to deal with them logically and emotionally simultaneously.
“y/n?”, mingi asked again, looking at you with worry apparent in his eyes but that you missed anyway because you were staring into nothing.
“i’ll bring you home, okay?”, he told you when you didn’t react, and then: “can you tell me your address again? or i’ll take you to my place if you can’t.”
you couldn’t, so he brought you to his place as he’d said, trying carefully to prevent you from getting hurt on the way because it still seemed like you weren’t fully present. he had his arm around your waist the entire time, guiding you, and then you entered that place again, the place that had been your home and refuge for a few weeks and that now looked so different but still the same. it looked… inhabited, maybe, and you tried to focus on all the small details that had changed as he took off his jacket and shoes and you mechanically did the same. then he led you to his room, their room, carefully sitting you down on the bed to figure out what would be best to do right now, whether he should talk or wait until you were more present. he decided to wait, you could tell from how he was looking at you, wait for your next action or reaction.
your next action was looking around; this was the first time you’d ever seen his bedroom, and you’d immediately noticed the picture on the bedside table when mingi had sat you down on his bed, focusing on him and her, taking in all the details to bring you back to reality at least somewhat.
“she’s pretty”, you said once you were kind of there again, and “she was” the man replied, looking at the picture with a mixture of fondness and pain on his face. it kind of hurt, knowing you’d never be as pretty, feeling guilty for worrying about having to compete with a dead person, but she looked ethereal, she looked at mingi with such happiness and he looked at her with an expression you knew he’d never have on his face when looking at you. you were nothing compared to her, you were a mess, you were ugly with your piercings and your hair and your messy, weak body that was still dealing with the effects of apparently having been bed-bound for ages, even if you couldn’t remember, and you didn’t fit with him. you didn’t fit with anyone like him.
“i want to sleep”, even though it was maybe five or six in the afternoon, but you didn’t want to have to deal with your emotions right now and sleeping helped. maybe you were his soulmate, but you were a second choice, not just for him but for fate, too, you weren’t enough and you’d never be the one he wanted. and if you didn’t sleep soon you’d be sobbing in his arms again, something you most definitely didn’t want.
“i want to shower”, you then changed your mind, wanting to cry and knowing that if you stayed quiet you could do so in the shower and he’d never know.
he just nodded, getting out a towel for you and some of his clothes - neither you nor he would want you to wear her clothes -, then brought you to the bathroom, asking you to please not lock because he was still somewhat worried. that was fine with you because you didn’t expect him to come in, anyway, because what was there to see? you weren’t pretty, you weren’t attractive, you weren’t hot. you were a stick and you were a mess and you looked sickly even though you were starting to build up muscle, and nothing of that would ever be something he’d want to see naked. so you closed the door and undressed, the light turned off as soon as mingi was gone, unable to stand looking at yourself naked, too. you hadn’t even known that you had these insecurities until you saw how beautiful she was and how horrendous you looked in comparison, and the first sob escaped your lips as soon as the water was turned on enough to swallow it.
//
you’d been in the shower for thirty minutes now, and at this point he worried. you’d reacted when he knocked at the twenty minutes mark, so he knew you were still alive, but you hadn’t been doing well when you went in, and when he knocked again and he just heard you whimper he went in.
as soon as he opened the door he was greeted by hot steam coming out, and he could barely see because it was so steamy in there, the air hot and humid. it cleared a little now fresh, colder air was coming in, and he made his way to the shower after turning on the light - why was it turned off in the first place? -, pulling back the curtain because he heard you sob and because the water had to be really hot for the room to be in this state and he worried, he did.
and there you were, skin bright red, the water burning you and you just sitting on the floor and crying.
“y/n”, he almost yelled, shocked and scared, and turned off the water, getting slightly burnt on the tap and from the few drops falling onto his skin even as he tried to avoid the water. then he kneeled down, pulling you to his arms carefully because he didn’t want to hurt you but he worried so much about your sorry state, and you just kept sobbing.
“why’d you do that, why’d you do that, why’s the water so hot”, he repeated, completely overwhelmed, you still sobbing in his arms, but trying to answer.
“i just wanted to feel something”, you told him, “it was so hot but i still didn’t feel anything. it’s not hot enough”, arm moving to turn the water back on, but he stopped you.
“no, no, we won’t do that, we won’t do that, angel”, stroking your head and his heart hurting at how red your skin was. he could only hope you didn’t actually get any burns.
“i want to feel something”, you repeated, and mingi was so overwhelmed, he didn’t know what to do, but he wanted to help.
“can i turn on the water, but cold? maybe that’ll help, maybe it will, but i can’t let you burn yourself.”
he was pleading, hoping you wouldn’t hurt yourself any more, hoping you’d let him take care of you, and when you nodded he felt relieved, making sure the water was at an acceptable temperature before turning it on, gently washing you with the cold water, hoping to prevent it from getting too bad, rubbing your naked body but not caring about the fact that you were naked, caring only about taking care of you even when his clothes were getting soaked.
“is this okay? how does it feel?”, gently rubbing your scalp with the cold water, then your neck and your back and your sides, carefully, trying not to hurt you any more than you’d inevitably be when your senses registered your surroundings again.
“it hurts”, and it seemed like you were starting to come back, the sobs getting more violent again now that you were able to feel your skin be so tight and aching and red from your stupid attempt at feeling something.
“i’m almost done, let me just make sure everything is a little soothed, let me take care of you, i’m almost done”, he tried to calm you down as he rubbed your legs with the cold water again, finally turning the water off and getting up, grabbing a towel and wrapping it around you before he told you to turn around, stripping himself of his wet clothes quickly, drying himself just enough to not soak his new clothes as he put on the pants he’d picked out for you before he told you that he’d put his shirt on you now, asking you to lift your arms if you could so he could do that.
you looked so small and hurt in his massive clothes, you made him want to protect you, and at least for the night he would.
“do you want to go to bed? let’s go to bed, angel”, he told you like he was talking to a child, but it kind of felt like he was. he could tell moving hurt and it made his heart hurt all the more, wanting nothing more than to take at least some of your pain, just enough for you to not be crying out like this because you didn’t want to do anything anymore.
laying down hurt, too, he could tell from how you flinched, and he tried very carefully to not make the bed move too much as he laid down next to you. you were laying on his side, he was laying on what used to be hers, and for a moment he felt a pang in his chest, but now his focus was on you, on trying to make sure that you’d be okay.
“it’s time to sleep. i’m here and if it gets too bad, wake me up. i promise i’ll be here.”
if being alive hadn’t hurt so much you would’ve thanked him, but now you just closed your eyes, and mingi watched your form almost vanish underneath the blankets he’d put on you, hoping that the next morning you’d be okay.
//
you woke up around one am, as the little clock on the night table told you, with your body hurting and your heart hurting even more. you wanted to be held, to be protected, you wanted to be taken care of.
“mingi”, you whimpered, hoping he’d wake up, “mingi, mingi.”
he shuffled, though you couldn’t tell if he was awake or not, so you continued whimpering, until you felt him sit up, and shortly after you heard his panicked voice.
“what’s wrong? what’s wrong, what’s wrong, are you okay?”
he sounded so scared that you felt bad, whimpering even more because everything was horrible and everything hurt.
“y/n, are you okay? do we need to go to the hospital?”, and although you couldn’t see him he was scanning your body - or, as much of it as he could see - for burns or any other clear signs of you needing immediate medical attention.
“no, i just… hug me, please”, you pleaded, him immediately complying even though he hadn’t expected this to be what you needed right now, especially not when you flinched in his embrace, but when he loosened his embrace and was about to move back you grabbed his hand, whimpering again, not wanting him to let go even if it hurt.
“is it okay? i don’t want to hurt you”, he told you with a soft voice, but he moved back closer towards you, trying hard to not move you as he came to lay as close as possible to you, one arm around you and the other above his head so that that one wouldn’t hurt you.
“don’t go”, you cried, his hold around you tightening slightly in reaction.
“i won’t go. i’ll take care of you, angel, i’ll take care of you”, he repeated against you, over and over, and you fell asleep to his promise.
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